#so uhhhhhhh here's the end ig ??

[the-bimbo-bunny]

okay y'all listen

TLDR: my friend who was the Aziraphale to my Crowley did the same thing Azi did at the end of season 2 (but worse) and it ended up only validating my kin

for almost 20 years (I'm 23) I had a best friend who ended up kinda being my Aziraphale friend. after basically our whole lives of being friends we both got really into Good Omens, they borrowed my book, we binged season 1 together, and (after it being announced years later) anxiously awaited season 2 to binge as well. after season 2 we only resonated with the characters more and it became a really comforting bit calling each other Aziraphale and Crowley (we're neurodivergent and got attached to the fictional characters, sue me) It was very wholesome and fun, and I mean hell they even threw me a Good Omens and Jimmy Buffett themed surprise party (again, neurodivergent)

like dude they even made me this cake!

then like a week later they literally did the worst thing they could've possibly done (not going into detail here) and just up and abandoned me and everyone else for something that is genuinely hopeless and they're the only one not able to see it.

so, obviously we're all heartbroken bc we lost someone who meant the world to us, but uhhhhhhh

weirdest fucking way to validate my kin but like damn okay, ig I am Crowley lmao

[duderaveart]

idk what happened to my other account but ig this username is available again so : ) thats cool hello

im uhhhhhhh gonna try to post art on the internet again so heres something old but good that was featured at the end dimension 20 (season 2? ehhh idk) : )

[limoncats]

hey, remember the tag on this post?

you know what? i'm gonna explain.

quick apology if the post sounds weird, it is currently 1 minute away from 11 pm as i'm typing this sentence.

ig this is a vent? anyway long post up ahead so !!

also apologies if this sounds stupid.

btw this post is not a self-diagnosis post

TWs for: mentions of self-h@rm, discussion of trauma

if these trigger you, don't read this! or do, but just be warned.

okay, so,

am i disabled?

alright, so am i physically disabled? no, not to my knowledge.

am i mentally disabled? i have no official diagnosis, but i am speculating. the speculation in question? this whole post

i have speculations that i have Asperger's Syndrome and possible selective mutism

Asperger's Syndrome

okay so. let me show you the symptoms and i'll explain

according to nationwidechildrens.org, the symptoms for Asperger's are:

i'll go over each one and tell you my experiences with each

now uh. i don't actually know what this means ;; but if this counts, i'll put it here: whenever i'm supposed to say basic things like "good morning," or "thank you," i can't seem to verbally? like the words don't seem to be able to come out of my mouth. it actually is more like that i don't even think to say them, so i don't. i remember this whole thing resulted in a fucking argument i had with my mother and her friend JUST because i didn't say good morning to him. as you can imagine, it was pretty traumatic. i think this may actually be more of "struggling to understand social cues," but eh.

i– yeah i can understand emotions usually (if i can clearly see it/tell based off of a person's facial expression what emotion they're feeling.) and i think my expressiveness is fine? idfk however kill me.

i can understand gestures just fine, unless i don't clearly understand what the person means? it's like if my mum points to something but i don't know where she's pointing to because i can't tell (and then she gets mad at me ;;). it might just be a thing on my mum's part but honestly i don't fucking know.

yes! irl the only thing i talk about with my school friends is CoAD since they like it too, and it's usually super awkward when i try to talk to an irl friend who doesn't know/enjoy CoAD so ;; and if they don't, sometimes i tell them about it and keep rambling on and on about it. now regarding the "convos revolving around them," part, i'm also pretty sure that's a yeah too? like yk when i ask a question like "guys what (insert thing here) am i"? i feel that i do that pretty frequent and i think it counts so ?

nah i think my speech is fine

mfw CoAD

auhhh???? i don't know i don't have memory of it so i think no

uh. if getting mad at my mum for making me do chores while i'm having fun either watching a video, talking to friends or drawing counts then uh. yeah

oh ofc. like i memorised how tall Wadanohara's familiars (Memoca, Dolphi, Fukami and Samekichi) are and when Yonaka's birthday is instead of memorising what the word "verbatim" means (it took me some time to memorise)

i don't think i'm that clumsy + my handwriting is fine and it's easy to write so

ohhhh Hm. so i can hold emotions pretty fine (it does sorta hurt to hold in so much anger) but sometimes they do come out a little and i end up like punching my thighs or something. it's happened at school before (yes, i've actually punched my thighs out of anger before)

uhhhhhhh??????? i feel like i'd have to get reeeeally specific for this one and i'm not feeling it right now

now to lights and touch i'm fine, but sound? lemme explain. so i can listen to like a video at (somewhat) loud volume while at home, but if i overhear like loud music coming from a club i get uncomfortable and i sometimes cry

so that's that for the Asperger's part, now let's move on to:

Selective mutism

i'll format it basically the same as the previous section so.

according to NHS, symptoms of selective mutism are:

"characterised by a sudden stillness and frozen facial expression when they're expected to talk to someone outside of their comfort zone" is so real ngl

anyway

yeah i do get nervous. i assume i look so too

my mum tells me i come off as rude, she says like, "hey you can't just stay silent! that's really rude!" wow mum i feel so much better! (<- lie) also i'm pretty sure i come off as sulky because whenever i frown around my mum's friends, once we're separated for something, my mum always says "suratına asma," which basically means "stop frowning." you have no idea how angry i get when i hear that my god.

nah i'm like. 99.9% sure that i come off as the opposite of clingy

yeah i sometimes describe myself as shy (sometimes is emphasised because i usually don't like calling myself "shy" because it makes me feel cringe.)

i. don't know lol. i guess so yeah? yeah i think so actually

i'm not aggressive (at least not physically or verbally), but i do get pissed when my mum asks me. ofc i don't let it out because i don't want to fucking assault mother

now i didn't include this because i don't think it's a disorder, but whenever i go through something traumatic (or the aftermath of something traumatic), i question if i'm real? like i think i sorta put myself in this sort of delusion that i'm living in a nightmare i can't wake up from whenever i go through something traumatic

also i hate looking in a mirror due to questioning who i'm looking at

i still question who i was looking at in the mirror that one day to this day.

i'm not sure if this is dissociation because i don't understand the definition of dissociation, or if it's part of a disorder. i did suspect DPDR, but i don't know i don't think so ? i'm also not sure if this is just puberty with the whole "questioning who you are" thing (though i think that's in terms of identity, not fucking questioning your REALITY 💀)

have i tried getting a diagnosis?

yes, i have, actually, so let me explain:

i wrote a text document to my dad about my speculations on having Asperger's, but he just laughed it off and said "i've met people with autism and you're NOTHING like them haha!!!" which was just. okay dad.

he suggested i tell my mother and i agreed

now this is when things go downhill 😭😭

so i told my mum when i went back to hers and she also basically had a similar response but she agreed to get it diagnosed one day.

then some time later she tells me that i might have to wait 2 years to get my diagnosis so 💀💀💀

and then one day i start telling her that one of my school classmates recommend talking therapy and all of a sudden she gets all hostile like "why do you need to label yourself? what difference does it make? it's unnecessary" which is VERY funny considering this woman is a FUCKING SOCIOLOGY LECTURER WITH A PHD.

we've had a couple arguments about it and it still pisses me off. she even practically made fun of me to her friend's husband when i went to The Netherlands last week and she was like, "yeah i think her generation has a weird obsession with needing to label themselves?" mum do you hear yourself. oh i'm sorry i want to improve my mental health by knowing what's up with me and attempting to get support.

SPEAKING of trying to get support once diagnosed, during one of our arguments over if diagnosis really does anything at all, in response to her saying, "what do you do with it?", i said, "i can well. try and get support ??" and then HER ASS responds with, "THERE IS NO SUPPORT."

FUCK YOU MEAN THERE IS NO SUPPORT???? YOU'RE A SOCIOLOGIST YOU KNOW DAMN WELL THERE IS.

i haven't told either of my parents of my speculations for having selective mutism, though i feel it'll just go the same as what happened with the Asperger's shit so

i think my parents just have stereotypes of autism that i don't fall into so thErEfoRE YoU'Re noT aUtistiC!!!!11!1!!

anyway so that's practically it. thanks for reading what absolute insanity i've gotten myself into, and also what state my mental health is in!!! (ofc this isn't the entirety of my mental health lol.)

have a good day/afternoon/evening/night ♡

— limoncats

[jelly-as-in-grape-concord]

48 + 50!

48. OC who is a perfect cinnamon roll, too good for this world, too pure

no one in either story is textbook "perfect cinnamon roll" but sasha ramirez and gigi (gianna crane (shes from cannibalistic pigeons, the project partner i mentioned)) are close contenders. Sasha is a nice person, but not like the pure and innocent variety yk? gigi on the other hand, does start out in cannibalistic pigeons as like 100% cinnamon roll but eventually unfurls completely as the forest begins to call her into it. kinda like how you unfurl an actual cinnamon roll, the sugar and cinnamon and sweetness is still there, it is fundamentally still a cinnamon roll, however it is now a strip of what it once was. or something like that idk the metaphor got away from me

50. Give me the good ol’ OC talk here. Talk about anything you want

uhhhhhhh this is really long so

the gloam started out as bnha fanfiction LMAO

from the basic idea i had written in my notes: "Izuku is accidentally taken to a different universe where the prototypes exist (yu takeyama=uraraka, that version of bakugou that was blunt about everything, other weirdly designed people like kaminari and toruu). The world is kinda in an apocalypse state thats overrun by creatures called aberrants. there’s “heroes” but they’re treated like pest control than celebrities (people still did hero gimmicks for the fun of it)

he ultimately made friends with the other versions. he was forced back home after katsuki was killed by aberrant and yu wanted revenge

when he wakes up back in the regular mha world, aberrants start entering the world and hes the only one who knows how to deal with them"

which in short: alternate universes or whatever. the reason why i abandoned this idea though was because it sorta molded izuku and several other characters into something that they werent. so i saw a post that was like something about fanfics turning characters into basically OCs and i was like. wait a minute. I CAN DO THAT

and so:

the first original idea used to be about 7 teens going on a big camping trip after graduating from high school. the main couple (sylvia + guy i forget the name of) get into an arguement, its super awkward so theyre all like ok ig lets just go home, so sylvia goes in the car with isaac and sasha and in this version, theyre not rlly besties, just people who are friends with each others friends kinda deal yk. but BOOM on the way back they get into a car accident. Sasha and sylvia r badly injured and cant get out, so isaac goes to get help but gets replaced by another person(same as happens in the gloam 4.0 (yeag there is a 3.0 im gettin there)). the rest of the group catches up, get out of the car, and get eaten by a monster. then the whole plot after that was that sylvia and sasha wanted to find isaac as the replacement admits that on the other side of the forest, theres an alternate universe that they could travel to find him. i have no idea what was so supposed to happen after so i scratched the idea.

gloam 3.0 was something similar, adding in the spiciness that the inside of the forest WAS the alternate universe and everyone in it was fighting for their lives. and also sylvia got a gun. what!!! then i scrapped it because i still had no idea how it would be ending or how the story would start because i kinda hated the car accident thing. i could never imagine it quite right.

then theres the gloam 4.0, where you BECOME this alternate version of urself by becoming a sick monster. and also i aged up the main three because i dont know how to write teenagers. im hardly one myself sometimes but i have hanged around both middle aged and old people for my entire life.

i did keep the original ig crossing a threshhold into an alternate universe thing as a seperate idea (anti-glory) but its not something im thinking or working on

(theres a lot more detail that i coul write here but im currently typing this in a moving vehicle and very sleepy)

[whitneydaniell]

by: L.S. Stratton Published: Mar 28, 2023 Genre: Thriller, Murder Mystery, Fiction 320 Pages, Paperback

★★★

GoodReads Synopsis:

Tasha Jenkins has finally found the courage to leave her abusive husband. Taking her teenage son with her, Tasha checks into a hotel the night before their flight out of D.C. and out of Kordell Jenkins’s life forever. But escaping isn’t so easy, and Tasha soon finds herself driving back to her own personal hell. As she is leaving, a white woman pounds on her car window, begging to be let in. Behind the woman, an angry man is in pursuit. Tasha makes a split-second decision that will alter the course of her she lets her in and takes off.    Tasha and Madison Gingell may have very different everyday realities, but what they have in common is marriages they need out of. The two women want to help each other, but they have very different ideas of what that means . . .   They are on a collision course that will end in the case files of the D.C. MPD homicide unit. Unraveling the truth of what really happened may be impossible‒and futile. Because what has the truth ever done for women like Tasha and Madison?

My Review:

Uhhhhhhh, where to begin?

I love a good murder mystery but I hate terrible, unlikable characters. Tasha and her son, Ghalen are both.

An unsuspecting Tasha invites a stranger, Madison, into her car to save her from her abusive husband - or so she thinks. Madison then reaches out to thank Tasha, invites her to lunch, then drops a bomb on Tasha as she is heading to the METRO to get home. Tasha is a victim of domestic abuse and ultimately, she is returning home from this lunch right back to the man who has been holding her captive!

Here are some areas where things fall off the tracks for me:

Tasha leaves the hotel to return to Kordell because her 17-year-old son wants to stay. He is 17. He can make that decision for himself. If he is unwilling to see his father for who he really is and has your best interest at heart, LEAVE HIM THERE WITH THAT MAN AND GO ON ABOUT YOUR BUSINESS.

Madison's proposition to Tasha. Madison is not an intelligent criminal if this was her plan all along because now, you've been seen in public with this woman. You've messaged her on IG - which could be used as evidence. Not only with Tasha but, you're talking on the phone with Summer about committing a crime. That's like, the number 1 rule when doing dumb sh*t; don't leave a paper trail or have conversations on the phone. Word to American Gangster!

Morris was way too nice and way too willing to go along with Tasha's dumb sh*t. As a man, how could you walk around with this woman knowing what her husband is doing to her? Why not go to the police to try to save her?

Ghalen! I saw his abusive tendencies coming a mile away. Sadly, Tasha is a mother that we all know; a mother who loves her son instead of raising him. That boy is immature and emotionally stunted and from the moment he was able to discern what was going on around him, he should have been in therapy. For seventeen years he witnessed his father abuse his mother. Not only that but, his mother has only babied and pacified him, his actions, and his behaviors. He was insufferable.

For a murder mystery, it had a great twist. But for me, when there are no redeemable characters, and no one to root for, it makes it hard for me to "like" the book as a whole. Detective Simmons was the only character who had some sense and even he got on my nerves. You cannot function off of lack of sleep and 12 cups of coffee.

I've said it before about murder mysteries: usually, the cops are useless and dumb but, Simmons sniffed out the right clues immediately.

Final Thoughts: The story was cool, I'd give it a 4/5. The characters killed it for me tho, they're a 1/5.

One-Word Summary: 818 Wicker Street

[glittermork]

Modern Royalty AU pt. 3

part 1 part 2

Summary: Jaemin’s mom is suing the king.

(Alternatively: Renjun and Jeno finally have that talk they’ve been meaning to get to for the last three months, and Jaemin is alive.)

Jaemin hasn’t woken up in a hospital since he was seven and his father bashed an empty soju bottle over his skull. Back then, the scar had been cool and the schoolwork he’d missed was easily made up. His mother had been by his side crying when he’d woken up. His father had given him ten bucks and the new Spider-Man comic for lying to the nurse about how he’d gotten hurt.

Roughly sixteen years later, he wakes up to the sound of someone sobbing.

“Hnnngnhghn,” he says, and the sobbing stops with a choked gasp.

Jaemin peels one eye open and regrets it immediately. Sitting on Jaehyun’s lap on the left side of his bed is Taeyong. (Fuck. Jaemin doesn’t know how to deal with people when they cry! This isn’t part of his job!)

“Oh shit, he’s awake,” he hears Jaehyun mumble, and he just barely resists the urge to roll his eyes, (mostly because he suspects that it would really fucking hurt), as he struggles to sit up. Unfortunately, this is also the exact moment his body decides to let him know that there is a bullet hole in his fucking torso, and maybe he should take that into consideration when he tries to make any sudden movements.

Collapsing on the bed in an uncoordinated flop, Jaehyun smirks at him and Taeyong frowns. “Lay back down, you dummy,” Taeyong sniffles, collecting himself from his boyfriend’s lap. Jaemin would spare a thought to wonder why he’s not worried about being caught, if it didn’t feel like his entire body was on fire. He should probably stop jumping in front of bullets.

“Na Jaemin,” Taeyong begins his lecture, and Jaemin groans. “Do you have ANY IDEA how fucking worried we were about you? You almost died on the operating table! TWICE! I thought we were really going to lose you the second time! What the fuck!”

“I almost died again? Jesus,” Jaemin mutters.

Taeyong splutters. “The fuck do you mean—AGAIN?!”

“You know I had a job before this, right?”

“Well, yeah, of course, but—you know what? No. Shut up. I was worried! And I thought your mom was going to actually strangle my dad and—“

“Hold up, my mother is here?”

Taeyong stares back at him blankly. “You got shot, Jaemin. Of course she came.”

“Your mom is, like, really fucking mad at you, by the way,” Jaehyun says. Jaemin assumes he’s just here for Taeyong’s emotional support.

“Shut up, Jae,” Taeyong groans, drying his tears on his boyfriend’s sweater. “I’m gonna go get a nurse. Play nice or I’m not putting out for a month.”

“Damn,” Jaehyun mutters under his breath, and sits back down in his chair next to Jaemin’s bed. “Seriously, though, kid, the doctor handed your mom your nipple piercings in a plastic bag ‘cuz I guess they had to take them out for surgery or some shit and she fucking, lost her mind.”

“Great! Thanks, Jaehyun! That’s exactly what I wanted to hear, two minutes after waking up from a coma!”

“I didn’t know you had nipple piercings,” he continues, and Jaemin thinks this is maybe the last conversation he’d like to be having right now. He’s tired. and he misses Jeno and Renjun. “Aren’t you, like, five? I didn’t know they let toddlers get nipple piercings?”

“First of all, I’m twenty-three,” Jaemin grumbles, glaring at him. “And I’ve had them since I was eighteen, so fuck you.”

Jaehyun holds his hands up defensively. “Hey, you do you, man, all I’m saying is—“

Jeno and Renjun, of course, decide that it’s the appropriate moment to make an appearance. Seriously, fuck his fucking life. The door flies open, and standing there, in all their slightly-haggard, stayed-at-the-hospital-for-over-24-hours-glory, are the two (2) loves of his life. Jaemin kind of wants to go back to sleep.

“Fucking hell, Nana,” Renjun mumbles, and promptly bursts into tears. Jeno looks mildly alarmed but he’s also holding up his boyfriend with one arm and staring at his other boyfriend (they really need to have that talk) in a hospital bed, so, whatever. Together they sort of half-limp-drag-walk to the unoccupied side of Jaemin’s bed, and now Jaemin has to fight the urge to cry as well. So maybe getting shot is god-awful, but as long as these two are safe, he’d do it again in a heartbeat.

“Please never do that again,” Jeno breathes, and buries his face in Jaemin’s neck. Jaemin wonders if maybe this is some sort of punishment from god or whoever the fuck is up there, for falling in love with the prince and the prince’s boyfriend. There’s no other explanation for why they’re both climbing into his bed, and crying on his shoulders and holding his fucking hands.

“Um. What is happening here?” Jaemin asks Jaehyun, who is currently taking pictures of them for his blackmail folder.

Jaehyun gives Jaemin the most deadpan look, and sighs. “There’s no hope for you.”

He’s about to make a weak retort, when Taeyong, followed by a line of medical professionals, the king, and his mother, burst into the room.

Jaemin sighs. It’s going to be a long morning.

—

“What I don’t understand,” his mother is saying, but Jaemin hasn’t been listening since she started ranting about the Pride photos again. “Is why you didn’t think to tell me that boys you were in love with were the prince that you’re supposed to be guarding and his boyfriend?”

Jaemin shrugs half-heartedly, and licks another spoonful of pudding. They’ve gone over this four times already. He wants to take a nap. He misses his. . . .charges. (Are Jeno and renjun considered his charges? Is that the right word for it? Does he need to maybe cool it with the pain meds? Yeah, probably.)

“Could you keep your voice down?” He winces, and glances out the door. It would honestly be the cherry-on-top of the bullshit-sundae, if he got fired for being in love with Jeno and Renjun after he quite literally just took a bullet for them. Maybe it’s what he deserves.

“Oh, shut up,” his mom rolls her eyes, brushing a lock of Jaemin’s hair out of his eyes, and kissing his forehead. “You know they love you back, right, baby?”

“Mom, I—“

“No, you listen to me, Na Jaemin.“ Shit, she full-named him. “Those two boys have been here since the moment you were admitted. They’ve been crying over you all night and all morning and if you think that doesn’t mean they love you too, you’ve got another thing coming, honey.”

“Mom,” he sighs, and closes his eyes. The Academy didn’t train him for this. “They love each other. I’m sure they were just worried about me because we’re friends. Or they felt guilty that I took a bullet for them. Which they shouldn’t, it’s my fucking job. I’m probably just—reading too far into things. They’ve been in love since they were, like, infants, you know? I can’t mess that up. And I don’t want to.”

His mom gives him an unreadable look, and huffs, shaking her head. “you always were too stubborn for your own good, baby,” she says, and pats his thigh.

“Mom,” he sighs, and hides his face in the sweatshirt Jeno had given him because ‘I know you get cold easily’, (Jaemin had practically swooned right on the spot). He’d looked nervously to Renjun after that comment, but the older boy was just smiling affectionately at both of them, hand easily continuing to stroke the hair at the nape of Jaemin’s neck, his other resting clasped with Jeno’s over Jaemin’s lap. The entire morning had felt unreal.

“Jaemin,” his mom sighs back in the same tone of voice, and gives his sweatshirt a pointed look.

So maybe they do have some things to work out. But he just can’t get his hopes up. He’s doesn’t know what he’ll do if they get crushed.

“Don’t give me that look,” he blushes, tugging the hood over his greasy hair, and grimacing. “When’s the soonest I can take a shower?”

“I don’t know,” Donghyuck replies, poking his head into the room to announce his arrival. “You should’ve thought of that before you jumped in front of a bullet, idiot.”

“Hyuck!” Jaemin grins, making grabby hands at the giant plushie Hyuck is balancing with a bouquet of sunflowers and what looks like the entire boxed set of Buffy DVDs Jaemin keeps in the back of his closet.

“What’s up, Nana,” he grins, handing his mother the flowers and setting the DVDs on his bedside table. “How’s my favorite little bodyguard doing?”

“Shut up, Hyuck,” Jaemin rolls his eyes, hugging the soft bumblebee plushie to his chest. “I'm guessing the flowers are from your other thirds?”

“Yeah, Mark said sorry he couldn’t be here, poor baby’s been arguing with the charity ball security team all morning. The plushie is from Jisung, though.”

“Yikes,” Jaemin winces, “tell him I’m sorry I can’t be there to help him. And I know it’s from Jisung, I got his for him for his birthday last year.”

Hyuck shrugs. “I forgot about your weird symbiotic relationship. Anyway, clean up is Mark’s best skill, Nana. Besides, you should tell him yourself—he hasn’t stopped anxiety-ing over you all morning.”

“Tell him the flowers are lovely, too!” His mother interjects, gathering her purse and jacket and kissing him on the forehead. “I’m gonna go get lunch and find that dumbass king of yours—“ “Mom! Promise me you won’t—“ “I’m not promising anything!” She finishes, calling over her shoulder as she swings out the door. Jaemin would be assed to stop her if he didn’t already know what a losing fight looked like.

Hyuck rolls his eyes, and peels open Jaemin’s other pudding. Jaemin just barely suppresses the urge to pout.

“What kind of shit are they feeding you in here, anyway?” He asks, licking the lid, and Jaemin slumps back onto his pillows.

“Mush.”

“Gross. Okay! I’m done with small talk, time for the real reason why I’m here: you took a fucking bullet for them.”

“Hyuuuuck,” he whines, smashing his face back into the bumblebee plushie to avoid Hyuck’s knowing gaze. “Can’t you just be a normal visiting friend and tell me I was brave or some shit?”

“Fine. You were brave! And incredibly fucking stupid! Now, please tell me how you call that ‘a little crush that I’ll get over eventually’?”

“In case you haven’t noticed,” Jaemin mumbles into the pillow, “it’s kind of my fucking job.”

Hyuck sighs dramatically, and plops down on the newly-vacated chair. “Hopeless,” he mutters, and shoves another spoonful of low-fat pudding in his mouth.

—

The nurses had cut him off after two seasons of Buffy, so Jaemin and Hyuck had elected to play quiet music and talk about food. A subject neither of them could ever grow tired of.

Hyuck’s not really sure how that turned into this.

There are tears streaming down Jaemin’s face. It’s only two in the afternoon. The Weekend by SZA is playing for the sixth time in a row. Hyuck is five seconds away from murdering him in cold blood. His bullet wound kind of throbs but maybe it’s just his heart breaking into a million pieces.

“You’re not a side hoe,” Hyuck groans, snatching Jaemin’s phone and turning it off.

“Fuck you,” he sniffles, leaning back on the crinkly hospital pillows, “I’m a home wrecker. And I’m ugly.”

“You’re so incorrect about both of those things that I’m not gonna even respond to that! Okay, I think that’s enough phone-time. How about we just talk, okay? Doesn’t that sound nice?”

Jaemin sniffs. “Maybe,” he admits, sinking slowly into his pillow pile until the only visible part of him is his hair sticking out like an unruly tree branch.

Hyuck snorts. “Do you want to go to take a nap, baby?”

“Shut up.” Jaemin replies, and promptly passes out.

“Absolutely fucked,” Hyuck sighs to himself as he tucks the younger boy in.

—

Renjun has never been certain of anything as much as he and Jeno.

JenoJenoJeno. He could talk about him for days on end. He could wax-poetic about his eyesmile and his teeth and his hands for the rest of his life. Really, he plans to. Jeno, Jeno, Jeno. The boy he’s loved for as long as he can remember.  

And while Jeno is lovely and beautiful and Renjun’s very best friend in the entire world, he has a tendency to hang off Renjun’s every word. And while that’s, admittedly, fantastic, it’s not always what Renjun needs. Sometimes he needs someone to push back. Someone who can meet him blow for blow. Someone who’s not afraid to talk back.

In other words, Renjun needs Jaemin.

JaeminJaeminJaemin. His ears, his nose, his cheeks. Renjun could think about him for hours—days—weeks, on end. He feels like the wind is knocked out of him every time the bodyguard makes eye contact with him with that gorgeous smile. That smile. Renjun has dreams about it.

And, if his suspicions are correct, (fucking hell, please let them be) Jeno needs him too.

“So,” says Jeno after fifteen minutes of him and Renjun staring at each other across the unforgiving plastic benches of the hospital cafeteria.

“I think I’m in love with your bodyguard,” Renjun blurts out, and then immediately freezes.

“Oh, good,” Jeno sighs in relief. “Me too.”

—

“You can’t sue him,” Taeyong sighs for what feels like the hundredth time.

“Of course I can’t sue him,” Jaemin’s mom rolls her eyes. “He’s the fucking king. I’d lose in a heartbeat.”

“Then what, exactly,” Taeyong pinches the bridge of his nose, “was the point of you wasting my entire day?”

She shrugs, and takes a neat sip of the Diet Coke the prince had bought her after the first twenty or so minutes of arguing. “Just buying my idiot son some time to figure his shit out.”

—

Jaemin wakes up to the two people he’s most recently almost died for. It’s a pleasant surprise, considering he thought he’d be fired by now. Shit. Maybe they wanna do it in person?

“—min? You’re not listening to us at all are you?” Renjun chuckles, and Jaemin feels his cheeks heat up in embarrassment. So much for not being obvious. These meds are seriously fucking him up, huh?

“Jaem,” Jeno continues for Renjun, grabbing his boyfriend’s hand. Despite his better reasoning, Jaemin let’s his gaze rest painfully, just a second too long, on their clasped hands, and sits back against his pillows with a wince. Apparently, it’s time to be friend-zoned by the first people he’s been interested in since he was 20. What a sad end to a short career as a professional Kevlar vest.

“Jun, and I have finally had a talk, and—“We love you!” Renjun blurts out, and then promptly buries his head in Jeno’s shoulder as the prince chokes out a laugh in surprise. “Yeah,” he nods hopefully, staring expectantly at Jaemin as he scratches the back of his neck. “We love you. And we want you to be ours. That about covers it.”

Jaemin is absolutely floored. There are very few people in the world who Jaemin considers worthy of his complete love and protection, and two of them are standing here in his room looking at him like he’s the last piece to their 2000 set jigsaw puzzle, and this cannot be real.

He’s distracted from his own frantic, rambling thoughts by Renjun’s delicate, light fingertips brushing away a tear. That’s an interesting development, he hadn’t realized he’d been crying.

Through a few disgusting, choked out sobs, he manages to warble in his stupid, watery voice, “I love you too.” And then lips—he doesn’t know, and, frankly, doesn’t care who’s—are on his like a lifeline, and there’s nothing he feels like thinking about more right now, than how good it feels to finally, finally be complete.

In Renjun and Jeno’s strong, warm, arms, it feels like home.

—

There’s something to be said about the persistence of the paparazzi. Somehow, someway, they always know where to be to make the most absolute inconvenience of themselves and to make their subjects’ lives just that much less private. Truly, a marvel of a job.

There is also, however, something to be said about the sheer terror of going head to head with Jaemin’s mom.

“LISTEN UP, YOU FUCKING CREEPS,” she yells, and Jaemin doesn’t bother listening to the rest. “That was a pretty good start, I think,” Renjun comments, happily playing with the strings of Jaemin’s hoodie. He’s sitting on Jaemin’s lap and they’re both snuggled under the hideous blanket some nurse had draped over them when they’d gotten situated on the wheelchair. It still feels unreal to Jaemin, just as unreal as the sweet kiss Jeno drops on both of their foreheads as he skirts around them to deal with even more paperwork. Who knew even the prince’s bodyguard had to sign release forms?

“I can’t wait to get home,” Jaemin murmurs shyly into the base of Renjun’s neck, receiving a mouthful of soft, baby-pink turtleneck for his efforts.

“Me too, baby,” Renjun sighs, leaning further into his boyfriend’s embrace.

*click*

Their moment is interrupted by the snap of Jeno’s phone camera, as the prince shrugs at them sheepishly. “What?” He laughs, turning back to his paperwork. “It was perfect lock screen material, don’t judge me!”

Jaemin blushes, thinking back to his own lock screen, a picture of Jeno and Renjun he’d taken on one of their many forbidden, late-night, this-never-happened adventures. Renjun is on Jeno’s back, kissing Jeno’s cheek and holding up a peace sign, and Jeno is practically beaming at the camera, eye smile in full power. It’s Jaemin’s favorite picture of them ever, and he’s certainly spent an embarrassing number of nights staring at it desperately. Oh, if only he knew what was coming for him.

When he shows Renjun, the older boy gasps, immediately shoving it in Jeno’s face. “Oh, baby, this is one of my favorite pictures of us too! But, if I’m being honest, it’s missing something.”

“Hey!” Jaemin pouts playfully, trying not to grin. “It was the best I could do with my shitty old phone! I promise I’ll take many, many more.

“He didn’t mean the photo, Jaem,” Jeno laughs, leaning over to wrap Jaemin’s slightly-shaking hand in his warm, steady one. “He meant you.”

“Oh.” Jaemin, gasps, tears welling up in his eyes. How did he possibly get so lucky?

“Awwww, baby,” Renjun grins brightly at him. “We’re just gonna have to take a million more,” he shrugs.

Jeno nods solemnly in agreement, as he takes the safety brakes off of the wheelchair. Renjun slides off his lap reluctantly, taking Jaemin’s hand and tucking his blanket tighter around his shoulders.

“Ready?” Jeno grins, flicking his favorite pair of baby blue heart-shaped sunglasses down from their perch on the top of his head. Jaemin makes a mental note to buy him more colors when Renjun playfully whines that he wants to borrow them.

“Let’s go, you fucking dorks,” Jaemin laughs, tugging on Renjun’s hand and leaning his head back gently against one of Jeno’s arms. Renjun squeezes back and Jeno grins down at him, leaning down to peck Jaemin’s nose, and they’re out the door in mere seconds, to the flashes and screams of paparazzi and reporters alike.

Jaemin instinctively stiffens in his wheelchair, but relaxes immediately as both Jeno and Renjun squeeze his respective hands tightly in comfort.

It’s going to be fine. He has everything he needs, right beside him.

[despacitobandito]

alright Skylander OC shit les go

firstly lets start off with our fav bastard (affectionately), Tiphr

(also imma link all Picrews down below for when I'm done)

this lil bastard probably uses tumblr

age is uh around mid 20s, old enough to know better but young enough to not do better

he/she pronouns

intersex as well as genderqueer

lost both his right eye and arm in an accident. he can't get his eye back but he got a wooden arm from Dr. Krankcase

speaking of Dr. Krankcase, he ended up being Tiphr's father (adopted)

the "you're not my real dad" jokes are... frequent to say the least

also from Tiphr's joke department, he'll often say shit like "ah yeah it cost me an arm for this" or if you need help he'll say "need a hand?" and he'll give his entire fucking arm to you

he's a portal master

a headcanon of mine is that all Portal Masters have a "leaning" towards certain elements, which means that those ones are the quickest to control and/or learn. Tiphr's are Life, Tech, Air, and Dark, respectively

he kinda remembers where he was originally from, but most of it is just kinda... lost to time ig

ig since he is from another world, per say, does that make him an alien? the answer is yes

lots of steampunk vibes from this guy, but also with nature. good fun

he likes to call bras "tit jackets." no one knows where he learned it from, no one has been able to get him to stop

his wooden arm makes normal guitars sound like bass guitars

yes he can play guitar

he can be serious when need be, but he does enjoy being a funny source of comedy sometimes

loves plants, is a plant parent (would let moss grow in her room, much to Krankcase's dismay)

uhhhhhhh so here's an Inky boi

his name used to be Inkwash but uh i had to change that

i was in 7th grade when i made him, ooooooof

anyways, this guy is a Dark element

basically, he's an artist. his weapon is ink. oh and he's emo

creativity 100

haha ah well still love my emo wolf boi

listens to whatever the Skylands equivalent of MCR is

probably relates to that one pic of the anime girl where it has two sides and it says "I'm Fine."

godspeed you

has a sad aesthetic tumblr account

actually can kick ass in a fight surprisingly

catchphrase is "A painting of pain!"

my first OC (technically my second but an overpowered shapeshifter self insert doesn't count) which i have changed. a lot

she's a fire/undead element hybrid

catchphrase is "Here kitty kitty!"

has a pair of dragonlike wings (used to have a scorpion tail too but that was too edgy so that got scrapped)

now she just looks like a little charizard with her tail on fire :)

can self-immolate

was originally just a feathercat (like Scratch's race) who was dared to go into the Land of the Undead. she didn't come out the same, though...

was one of the first to be a hybrid element (not counting the SWAP Force but damn what they got going on is unnatural to say the least)

is totally a punk alt girl

likes being petted

you know that one song "go kitty go"? yea she unironically enjoys that

Tiphr makes fun of her for it

also yea Tiphr is besties with Grave

also Grave doesn't mind being called Gravy

so yea that was a long read. i'm not really sure how to conclude me rambling on about my own characters for a game that is kinda dead (not saying the fandom is, godspeed you guys) but yea, hope you enjoyed and here's a link to (almost) all the picrews i used

the other wolf one is from a game on DollDivine called Wolf Maker Unleashed (due to the death of Flash you can't run it on Google anymore but there's tutorials on the website to help you get around this)

[loverofallthingssmart]

hello!!! how about tvd i wanna know what it's like

hi sahar!!!!! you r everything tvd (these violent delights NOT the vampire diaries is SOOOOOOOOOO it literally makes you go insane)

okay here we go

favorite character: marshall seo. hes my bestie like FOR REAL

least favorite character: UGH tyler cai WHAT A DICK juliette IS the heir of the scarlet gang shut UP i dont wanna hear it from u

brOTP: marshall and juliette UGH besties !! like fr their interactions r so fun to read

OTP: ROMAJULIETTE DUH but also...benmars...

NOTP: is there a notp?? OH actually i think some people could interpret kathleen/marshall from their ONE interaction with each other but u need to understand marshall is just. like that (flirty) not to mention it says he’s gay like. straight off the bat his intro is like “that’s marshall. he’s blah blah and he got caught with a boy which is why smth smth” like i rmbr that

favorite storyline: the whole plot is so good. romajuliettes childhood era is so innocent and their falling out OURGH does smth to my heart but also the tension in present tense....not to mention the ACTUAL plot of the book its so good. also kathleens backstory was OHHHHMYGODDD

least favorite storyline: idk hmmmmm. actually maybe i dont kind of enjoy the tension + distrust rosalind has towards juliette near the end. thats all? or maybe that ENDING????? HELLO....

what I wish had happened but didn’t: benmars getting together i adored benedikt's pining i did i rlly did but i want more marshall pining and them getting together which im sure happens in the sequel so im not too mad about it

what happened that I wish hadn’t: idk. HELP uhhhhhhh alissa getting infected maybe??? but that spurred the plot on and the SECOND betrayal is also going to affect the plot so nothing ig?? it even had SO MUCH white man slander i ADORED it

send me a book/movie/show and ill answer some things abt it!!

[cheswirls]

alright alright think i am somewhat organized enough to lay this out n hopefully that will clear it from my system enough that i can focus on other things again; sa sw au based on @wallpengi‘s art here

(this one gets long rip mobile users ig)

ace

in this au roger is some sort of war criminal - to the reigning empire; his motives were hidden and he ultimately failed, so no one outside of command knows his true intent; his name is big enough to make a splash but instead of a ‘hope against the order’ its more of a ‘this fool who died for no cause of his own’

ace spent the first few years of life residing on some backwater planet in the inner rim. by backwater i mean specifically that it isnt connected to any hyperlanes so traffic is v limited. he adopts the outlook the ppl there had of roger over anything his mother had to say, since she never told him a straight-up answer in the end

after his mother dies he spends time being traded off between various people, before finally being fed up and running off on a cargo ship sometime when hes 10-ish

fortunately that ship was operated by shanks, who had a bit of a soft spot for little kids, even if they were stowaways; unfortunately ace learns shanks was part of rogers crew when he was active, and wanting nothing to do w that, isolated himself immediately from everyone on board, requesting to be dropped off at the next planet or ‘wherever the hell this thing stops next’

between this and that ace gets a low rundown of shanks’ life under roger and warms up enough to the crew to decide to stick around when they reach land; he becomes a proper member for several years, experiencing various planets, races, cultures, etc and his viewpoint expands immensely

when ace is 16 he leaves to make it out on his own, supplied with a ship hes saved up for and various mementos from the crew hes come to regard as a makeshift family -of sorts. but he hits trouble and crashlands on the first planet he enters into on his own, losing everything

luckily enough the planet has a [trading post] that he takes advantage of, hitching a ride to another post, and its from this trip that he steps into the world of underground transport

he works for a number of years transporting people to and fro for money, gaining a reputation as a cynic, and a hell of a pilot, willing to venture almost anywhere for the right price

its a series of happenstance that lead him to discovering hes force-sensitive (hes one of the last to know) and roger was as well. his last strike against the [order/empire/whatever] had been a jedi putting to rest, and what inspired the current rebel faction he ends up taking refuge in, and joining, after hearing all that about his old man

sabo

v cold and calculating and ruthless

high up enough to have some freedom of mobility and not be directly under anyones thumb but not high enough to have ppl under his command

era is uh??? rule of 2?? multiple sith???? thinkin theres gotta be more bc sabo isnt like. someones only disciple yknow. less impt than that

has only met dragon once and that was under an alias. in the same vein, hes run into several rebellion commanders but theyve all been disguised so he knows virtually what zero of them look like. this is largely strategic on dragons part to remain cover, bc the less sabo knows the less he can inadvertently reveal, conscious or otherwise

has a reputation for being meticulous and thus only communicating w one operator whenever he needs one -this one operator is koala, undercover within the empire, and lots of what sabo conveys to her is deep-coded messages to send back to the rebellion. this is the only form of assistance to the cause hes able to do, as anything else hes deemed as too high-risk (for himself)

background is probably uhhhhhhh parents sold him to the (empire-equivalent) once they figured out hed only be trouble to put up w and theyd have better luck putting their hopes in stelly; part of a stormtrooper unit/training/whatever until hes revealed as force-sensitive and then gets moved to develop that more; if the first half of his life is spent under his parents thumbs, the second half is spend in training in the dark side of the force (its a combo of meeting dragon n witnessing things while in stormtrooper training that keep him from sinking entirely, that allow him to maintain some sense of self, but hes also firmly attached to that side of the force n knows splitting away entirely at this point is impossible)

going back to the first point sabo is. not a good person here. hes supplying the rebellion but what he does in the meantime to maintain cover is a far cry from their intentions

very good actor, keeps his thoughts deep, essentially “loyal” to the dark side of the force til the very end in the sense that no one on that side ever suspects a thing, until theyre not around anymore

runs into ace once on accident n realizes before ace himself that hes starting to develop a connection to the force; forewarns rebellion via koala and acts independently in an attempt to try and steer ace their way before anyone else can pick up what he himself has, knowing firsthand how dangerous is it for potential jedi and force-sensitive creatures to be by themselves this day in age

again, his methods are different from his intent, so ace knows him only as the asshole that gives him a hard time whenever they cross paths

[when the conflict begins to die down and the rebellions victory becomes more prominent, sabo questions what he should do -if he had a place in the world anymore, if he could assimilate back into society; if he had to live the remainder of his life in isolation could he do so without losing himself entirely? could he interact with anyone without risk of infecting them with the dark side of the force’s malice? would it be better off if he perished? did he have a life worth living after the end of the war? its ace that convinces him to stop thinking and feeling so much, because no matter what happened, no matter what came for him, no matter what lie in store, he wouldnt be facing it alone, not with ace a constant at his side]

[kideternity]

Under the cut but uhm I read ostraunder/yale’s suicide squad and i have opinions 

This particular essay is gonna be babs oracle and count vertigo focused especially in regards to their disability (shown in the run bc ig ostraunder/yale forgot? count vertigo had menieres disease?? thats fucked up) I have other thoughts about this run but. Later. Also originally I was gonna do this in a rly fancy nicely written structured way but uhhhhhhh this run pissed me off lol! A lot! So they don’t deserve that effort. Anyways I’m speaking on this from the perspective as a physically disabled person with a personality disorder though if anyone who actually has bipolar or is a wheelchair user wants to add their two cent please do, but the way Ostraunder + Yale wrote Babs’ and Count’s disability is uh. Its sure complicated! And by that I mean it’s like....... outside of typical early 90s confused attitudes regarding to how being a wheelchair user or bipolar is, it’s very much a story that FEELS progressive on paper but still falls into classic ableist narratives. Like, The Count and Babs are both characters who are given legitimate agency regarding their disabilities- and like, they do have good scenes, I'm giving credit where credit’s due! They are written in a way that obviously makes you sympathise to them over their trauma and root for them as characters. I, personally, despite having fault with it, still believe Count Vertigo is the only dc character I have EVER felt properly represented by in a comic thus far- I empathised heavily with what he went through, and having now read the run in full, I empathise with babs and her struggle, too! But its just. Its just. The fuckers decided, that the natural “happy ending” to these arcs, was that both Babs and Count needed to be cured- that they would only be able to be truly content if they weren’t bothered by these ‘ailments’. Babs memory of the attack by the joker borderline feels like torture porn when it show ups, and they manage to find a way to bullshit Count being ‘cured’ in the end for his arc. And it’s just... it sucks! I hate it here! This isn’t a narrative I WANT- What I want, is too see two disabled people, who learn that despite their issues can and will be able to live happy lives, who will be able to live with both. And like, sure, there’s good stuff afterwards, they conclude Count being suicidal in a way that still impacts me, and it’s great seeing Babs take charge and lead the suicide squad pretty effectively and confidently when Waller is out of commission temporarily, but its just- There’s like. A sting to it, you know? I dunno. I just wish they talked about it more in a less shitty light, is all I’m saying. Though unfortunately it sucks even more even this is probably better then whatever the fuck they’re doing with the two now 😭😭 

[ivanaskye]

absolutely ridiculous dream under the cut. for the record I am not in the les mis fandom and only saw the movie once but I guess I was exposed to a bunch of barricade day posts. enjoy.

so the guy who played eliot in leverage and lindsey in angel was being tortured in my parents’ house. by my mom. for information??? aboht what op, mostly this took the form of uhhhhhhh repeatedly breaking his legs but then he regenerated them? at one point he was uh put into a female body also but ig that didn’t bother him that much and also it didn’t last long. anyway my parents were playing a board game in the kitchen and asked me to put on an album (while eliot was recovering in the living room which also had a bedroom bc layers)

the choices were mostly dir en grey albums and I wanted to put on kisou bc it fit the like, kinda gloomy weather outside. then my mom got mad at me bc somehow this particular album might allow eliot to escape? but no other album Fit The Day so in the end I still went w it. but it turned out that suiting the day wrll was exactly what eliot needed to uhhhh have the willpower to? leave? so anyway I caught him w a bunch of supplies clearly preparing to sneak out the front door and I took pity on him and let him

at this point I was like ok I gotta pretend really hard I had NO idea about this to my mom otherwise uh… idk maybe she will torture me too? so basically I tried to just like. pretend to be SO INTO the music I didn’t notice. also I took a bubble bath but first I had to take a vacuum cleaner out of the bath while it was partially filled and I was rly worried abt getting electrocuted by I didn’t. anyway somehow I fooled my mom

cut to: I’m out driving somewhere. in colorado. I’m trying to drive home but somehow a wrong turn happened and I ended up near castle rock. some buildings are like… surrounded by tiny tornadoes and I’m like “I think there might be a tornado forming” so I decide to drive in the direction most away from the tornadoes, for safety. this involves driving on really weird roads thst for instance involve uhhh zip lines and flipping levers and other video game mechanics except I’m In A Car

anyway this is how I end up at uh. a town in colorado that obciously contains the notre dame. keep in mind that the hunchback of notre dame and les mis we’re both based off the same book. obviously. so anyway I’m still driving wildly trying to avoid tornadoes. and eliot is there and mb also valjean and people are trying to kill him but at first I don’t rly want to get involved bc just bc I didn’t want him eternally tortured doesn’t mean I know if I support his goals

anyway in this complicated driving procedure I eventually ascend the notre dame and eliot is there and this is when I decide I’m on his side??? but wesley (from angel) is behind me and thinks I’m on HIS side and wants me to stop eliot. then I dramatically reveal that not only am I on eliot’s side ….. THE BABY IS NOT WESLEY’S. (it’s eliot’s). what baby. the newborn one I have in my hand now shut up

anyway now we’re at the top of the notre dame and that means the French Revolution Happened and is uhh a democracy now. a bunch of nuns and other catholic people are there thanking us. I explain how I only ended up here bc I was basically herded by tornadoes and the nuns are like well that is such an OBVIOUS sign from god/divine intervention. anyway there is a little package from the future that I can investigate and decide whether or not to open

at first I’m a little worried it might uh undermine everything we’ve done here or be fascist or something, but I look through the contents (via mobile game mechanics ofc) and it is from ben franklin congratulating us and has no ulterior anything. I open the package. everyone is happy. the dream ends

[pxrxmoore]

ohhhh anna’s lil tag game is very cute i love these questions! thank u @ashtcnirwin 🥰

feel free to answer all of them or just some of them or just ignore this all together, whatever you’re comfortable with, and then tag however many people you want!

1. what was your first encounter with fanfiction? asjdfk god it was atl fic on livejournal and mibba in like 2010 maybe?? idek but it was all slash fic like had literally not heard of reader insert until i joined the sos fam properly in 2018. also don’t remember what my reaction to it was?? reading slash fic has been so normal for me for like 10 yrs i dont know how the fcuk it started 😂 this was before i got tumblr but i used to keep up to date with some of the bigger atl blogs like it was the morning news or sumat and like 90% of them wrote amazing fic so 🤷‍♀️

2. your favourite creation of your own of all time if you create stuff (feel free to link it)?

3. what vibe are you going for with your home decor (or what vibe do you wanna go for one day, if you don’t have your own place atm)? oh man, unfortunately i dont have my own place right now, but my room is full of plants and i also just spent half an hour looking at witchy occult cat figurines on amazon sooooo ig those are my vibes rn 😌 but i feel like it changes all the time tbh

4. first fandom you ever joined? what was it like? on what platform did it happen? paramore was the first band i was a massive fan of but i didnt rly get into the fandom ig i just was my own lil bubble of pmore. i had a massive kpop phase when i was like 13 and my fave band was UKiss - i joined a forum (cannot remember what it’s called rn) and met a few people thru that! i met this rly sweet girl and we used to message every day and we like designed our own merch ackskrkr so ig that must’ve been my first fandom! i also taught myself basic korean and this is gonna sound Very Weird but instead of like knowing celebs zodiac signs it was rly common to know blood types like it was kind of the same deal apparently ur blood type says a lot about ur personality ajxjkskf so i knew like kpop idols blood types ajsjjfjjcjfjjf ahhhhhh so wild

5. what are your sun, moon and rising signs, and do you think they make sense in relation to how you know yourself? aries sun, leo moon, cancer rising - i am an absolute disgrace of an aries LMAO i do not fit my sun sign in the slightest its the complete opposite of me, leo is kinda similar tbh i feel like its kinda close to aries? so yeah i dont fit those at all. ig i kind of am more cancer bc im emotional as all hell LOL but yeah i never put a lot of thought into my signs for a rly long time bc i always felt they were a completely wrong description of me

6. if you write and/or read fiction (original or fanfiction), do the tropes/plots/character types you typically seek out to read and/or write about reflect something about you as a being or how you see the world? i don’t write but uhhh i usually go for like hurt/comfort which??? ig i could relate to me LMAO how emo 😌 i’m not sure tbh, i deff don’t feel the characters i read reflect anything about me?? tbh i have never rly thought about this thats super interesting.... i feel like i love a good angsty fic but it has to have a happy ending asdksnidfg and im a pretty emo person but like ig im tryna be hopeful in the end?? so maybe?? yeah ig its how i would see the world!

7. what is the hardest obstacle you’ve had to overcome so far in life? holy shit uhhhhhhh man thts a tough one but idk if i wanna think about it in too much detail tbh 😌 ig recently i spoke to a dr about my mental health after years of pretending i wasnt depressed so 🤷‍♀️

8. what is your all time favourite song(s)? brighter by paramore - first song i fell in love with by them and ive been hooked ever since. before i listened to them i only listened to chart music lmfao literally had never listened to anything else and then after listening to paramore i started listening to rock/pop punk music and discovered all the bands that i listen to now!

9. what do you look for in a person you wanna keep in your life, be it a friend or a romantic partner or anything in between? hm ig recently ive realised its gotta be someone who has the same kinds views and values as me (i mean not down to a t but like generally the same kinda views and like respect for others u know) uhh someone i feel comfortable around to act my true chaotic self 😌✌️and also comfortable to know we can both talk about anything with no judgement no matter what it is. but also someone that respects like having seperate lives from each other? like not needing to be in each others pockets and knowing even if it’s been a lil while u can still message and it’s like no time has passed

10. this is a bit of a difficult one, but have you ever had a moment of clarity, a conversation with someone that made you go “oh!”, or anything along those lines? ooh i mean in 2018 i was working an office job in engineering and had a moment of like wow ive always wanted to work in events and especially live music and ive wanted to since i was like 13 and here i am 10 years later still considering that as a potential career path so ig it means something pretty significant and i decided to leave my perm job last year and go temp but then. yeah. this year happened so 🥴🤷‍♀️

i tag: @superbloomirwin @kindahoping4forever @spookydaddycal @pinkbubbles-and-bigtroubles @reveriesofawriter @mastasof-ravenkroft @rebelwith0utacause @karajaynetoday 💛

[aurltas]

author interview tag (!)

aaAAAA ty to @backcountry-deltora for tagging me!!! much loveee <333 i haven’t been looped into a tag game for so so long and this is making me feel 10000% better about the fact that i have not written a single fic related thing in MONTHS o)-( but i love to talk about writing and myself so here we go,,

Name: i went by crystal silvera on ffn and here for the longest time so a lot of ppl know me as crystal but my Real(TM) name is dani and my ao3 name is auritas so like take ur pick haha

Fandoms: currently in mxtx hell (im a mdzs main, to the shock of no one) but my og fandoms that i am still very much attached to are deltora quest (the OG og), young wizards, the raven cycle, and yuri on ice

Where you post: ao3 alllll the way babey (but i originated from ffn and still have some stuff up there.......it’s Not Good tho)

Most popular one-shot: oh boy i knew this was gonna be a popular one bc i only wrote like?? rambly reflective thematic pieces(?) before this, my First Attempt At Fluff lmao. even then, But we’re alive (because we bleed) still exceeded my expectations by far in terms of reception, probs bc mdzs was such an up and coming fandom at the time and i posted it right on the crest of that cql wave

Most popular multi-chapter fic: obviously where the light goes, also known as my beloved CHILD !!!! i don’t write multichaps anymore but this is 2 long ass chapters so ig that’s Technically a multichap haha,,, yeah i knew this one was gonna be popular for the same reasons as the previous one + the very intentional tipping of the scale i did here with the balance of fluff and other things. like this is just pure distilled sugar it’s so so fluffy

Favourite story you’ve written so far: oh mannnn i gotta say where the light goes. especially that first chapter, just,, damn. what was i ON ?? its so good!! what the heck!!! quite proud of my metaphor work there, even if balancing prose/poetry feel is very stilted at times . in terms of that balance i think i did a Really good job with and neither did the both of us bc i went back and reread where the light goes for inspiration and i was like “oh god this is DROWNING in metaphors i need to lighten it up a little”

Fic you were nervous to post: i was nervous about where the light goes bc i had such high expectations going in, like i Knew people were craving what i had but i was like, did i do it right?? will this be my breakthrough in the mdzs fandom??? and it sort of was and sort of wasn’t, which,, fair. also SUPER nervous for astriferous bc i had written it all in like, one (1) day and it was for an exchange LMFAOOO (and you can really tell it was all written in one go......it was only when i hit the end that it got Good)

How you choose your titles: when i write fic i’m often scrapbooking a TON of different things together so titles are often just whatever it is i’m already drawing from. there are a few exceptions, like here, then, begins the mending, or and i need nothing more where a phrase popped into my head during the writing/drafting/brainstorming process and i was like OH THAT’S REALLY GOOD. TITLE IT IS

Do you outline?: usually only if it’s plot-driven, like my (incomplete for . Reasons) (ok i was being pestered bc i took it as a prompt and my promptee was. hm) YW multichap equilibrium, for which i outlined EVERYTHING. it was so annoying but i also lowkey liked it because these were MY messy outline notes and i could go as ham as i’d like

Complete: everything that’s posted !! except equilibrium ofc . that’s gonna stay where it is unless by some miracle of nature i get my momentum back for it

In progress: i am working on another jaslief oneshot!!! and for my mdzs folks i have been working on a rly long lesbian songxiao oneshot for a Very long time and it’s . mwah (i showed it to one of my friends and she lost her mind so i think i can say that with confidence)

Coming soon: probably nothing until i’m released from ochem/thesis hell hahahahahahahaaa but if anything were to come out this year it would be the songxiao most likely !

Do you accept prompts?: not after what happened last time !!!! ;o; until i’m done with school altogether, i really need writing to remain something For Me

Upcoming story you’re the most excited to write?: i wanna finish my jaslief SOOOO bad oh my god . i put in so much self-indulgence in there and used what i learned from where the light goes to make it REALLY good n thematic. like don’t get me wrong i am also so excited for my songxiao but i wrote it with some uhhhhh Influence from things i was going through irl and it feels weighty now?? idk i’ll work it out eventually,, i’ve also had oubing fic brewing in my head for literally a year and i REALLY wanna write some pynch in the barns/cabeswater content. let me write about dreamthings and nATURE

Upcoming story you’re most excited about?: bold of u to assume i read multichapters anymore HAHAHA i rotate through the same library of 100 one-shots i have bookmarked now......but back when i did read multichaps i was REALLY into the work of iruutciv + orchids_and_fictional_cities team from yoi, they were absolute LEGENDS and their fic and miles to go before i sleep changed me as a person lmao (i also did read part of their ongoing but monsters are always hungry, darling and i’m actually still in their discord for it but it is SO so intricately crafted and i fell out of the loop and didn’t rly get back in) . currently i follow megafaunatic aka etymologyplayground’s work the most closely for my mxtx fix (my fav from them currently is probably you, asleep and dreaming)

tagging: @lenawin4 and uhhhhhhh anyone else who feels like doing this?? for my life i cannot recall any other writers off the top of my head rn o)-(

[recordmcqueen]

end-of-year asks

saw a post for this on my dash and figured no one ever sends me asks anyway so i may as well do em all myself umu

so here’s more info you didnt wanna know abt me :D

Song of the year?

hmmmmm thats a tough one but tbh i think clusterhug by idkhow sums it up pretty well and also absolutely sERVED the album we all been waiting for so :3

2. Album of the year?

well- razzmatazz i mean what else was i gonna say omg

3. Favorite musical artist / group you started listening to this year?

ooh sTARTED? probs waterparks then like yea i added turbulent to my playlist a while ago but i didnt actually Listen to them till lately but i am So glad i did :D

4. Movie of the year?

uh uhhh the old guard :3

5. TV show of the year?

i-i dont think i started any new shows this year rip :/

6. Episode of tv or webisode that defined the year for you?

BIJ WHO WOULD I BE KIDDING IF I SAID ANYTHING OTHER THAN SUPERNATURAL 15x18 SPANISH DUB OMG I DONT EVEN WATCH SPN LMAOO

7. Favorite actor of the year?

uhhhhh i mean..?? //idk noises

8. Game of the year?

i would say among us but yeet dabson is unparalleled so gotta go with hogwarts mystery uwu

9. Best month for you this year?

either january or december lel

10. Something that made you cry this year?

roughbreakupisroughahem uhhh l i f e :’3

11. Something you want to do again next year?

i- idk?? i honestly have no idea oop- survive ig :p

12. Talk about a new friend you made this year

“a” well i found ac and ashton and kamy and dia and ruby and all yall super awesome wonderful funky beans ilysm 🥺 <33

13. How was your birthday this year?

ask me after tomorrow :|

14. Favorite book you read this year?

tbh the only books i read this year were aftg and capri soooooo gonna go with prince’s gambit cause that thing was legendary :3

15. What’s a bad habit you picked up this year?

...uHmmmmmm closing myself off ig? but its kind of a coping mechanism for my circumstances so yknow :/

16. Post a picture from the beginning of the year

like...of me?

17. Post a picture from the end of the year

if yall want selfie then u gotta slide into my askbox and demand one lmaooo

18. A memorable meal this year?

hanging at timmys with my bestie before we moved qwq 

19. What’re you excited about for next year?

thats a question. uhhhh hopefully an improvement from 2020??

20. What’s something you learned this year?

I AM EPIC N FUNKY N FABULOUS N POGGERS it’s so important to love yourself and its helped a lot. also aHEM not tryna please everyone :/ it doesnt work qwq

21. What’s something new about your place of residence (room, home, or general location) now vs the start of the year?

well im at my grandmas house rn so im basically never going back to the place in question lmaoo

22. Favorite place you visited this year?

bruh its 2020 the only place i explored was my imagination

23. If you could send a message to yourself back on the first day of the year, what would it be?

uhhhhhhh see on one hand i kinda cringe but on the other if i had Gotten the message from my future self it would likely hinder the ultimate character development i Did go through so yknow ig id just say “good luck” :p

24. Did you keep any New Year’s Resolutions?

...yes and no but yknow what i did technically fulfill it so thats somethin :3

25. Did you create any characters (in games, art, or writing) this year? Describe one

SO MANY LMAOOO but mostly my persona :3 hehe kachow

[cleaduvalls]

i watched all 20 episodes of spy kids: mission critical in about a week and here are my thoughts (3/5)

1.9

i havent watched this in like 2 days i dont even remember what happened last time

why is everything in the desert the desert sucks

alsjhiajgdf i love tom kenny

listen i know hes like a superandroid or whatever but i really hope he and therese fall in love

wait hold up. i thought they already had midterms???? like the did that before scorpion went to her fashion shoot. AND they were kupkakkes midterms. whats up with this school

no drinking in class???? rude. let them hydrate

that seems imbalanced

aHh

thats only like 10

also that book is dummy thicc

its ok ace my nose whistles too

shut up carmen youre just jealous because shes pretty

there are no seasons its a desert

ok dude stop breathing so hard

he JUST said that

anywhere between an hour and umm... 11 months

you put it on one page why are all the pages back

me but with physics

thats literally the best line in the whole series

juni how do you not know that you were at a safe H O U S E

theyve been gone for like 2 hours are they not allowed to study?????

what even is AWOL???

absent without leave. neat

talon gives off some big draco energy

tick tock???? how dare you

slkdhfa she called sir awesome honey shes such a mom

dont make it obvious

oh look they made it obvious

roll credits

i was in cleveland when i watched this episode - well actually i left that day - and i was s h o o k e t h

also hes right. no spy would be in cleveland. theres 3 buildings

oh me too

right bc shes the only “I.A.”

ew

eW

this isnt HARRY POTTER. or maybe it is. talon is a hardcore draco

oh right bc swearing is for Men™

update tumblr decided to break AGAIN (im boutta cry btw) so we lost about 5 minutes from the end of 1.9 and 7 from the beginning of 1.10

1.10

its a DOORBELL do they not have those in the outback steakhouse

lots of people. doofenshmirtz, other people who i cant think of right now, etc

???? no it wont????

did your troop leader not give you The Talk??? you NEVER go in the customers house

ace no. youre allowed to not buy treats

theres a triforce on her vest, too

shes just gonna go to another house yall. shell be f i n e

oh my God shes holding hands with mauly im gonna c r y

yeah its called saliva

nope only scorpion lives in a castle

stop bringing up spy sense and tell him you saw her glare at you

HES ALLOWED TO LIKE FOOD

how do you know that he doesnt have his phone if YOU dont know where it is and HE cant tell you

i love how she says "floor. ceiling. more thumb"

haha i found the birth of venus

oh and the creation of adam

hes like squidward, which would make sense bc goldies voiced by tom kenny who voices spongebob

"sebastian oliver" "shadow operative" S.O. nice

why do you have a trailblazers badge. youre 4. i didnt get one til i was a cadette

also sebastian???? isnt that the toymakers first name????? you cant have 2 sebastians

also why do you have braces. youre still 4

"SIR MEANIE FACE" IF SOMEONE SAID THAT TO ME ID BE D E V A S T A T E D

SCORPION LET HER CRY SHES F O U R

so really, spy sense DID help

oooooh, sentry duty, thats gotta hurt

WHAT THE H E C K YOURE F O U R

she looks like frickin plushtrap

aCE NO YOURW GONNA D I E

oh trust me they hurt me more than you know

dude theyre so thin youre f i n e

eh, still worked

clicking her teeth together so hard must H U R T

i think she can get out of there. also shes concussed now

why was that so quiet. why did it get louder

thats not a y shape

no, they spy kids

oh shiitake mushrooms thats what THEY said

whenever they say pinnoquinoxx i always think of pinnochio

ahdhhsjak i miss pizza parties 😔

well now we ALL expect it

also, no one????? pick a cooler code name. your regular name was cool and now youve ruined it

2.1

oh theres finally a skip intro option. im not taking it

stop saying that its weird

EWWWWWW CRUSTY THATS SO G R O S S

haha shes shopping w the goon. love that

oh yeah i didnt get to tell yall yet but i absolutely h a t e gablet

a lot of people, juni

listen i know a jt (but he doesnt go by jt) and uhhhhhhh were not gonna go there

why are you happy. what about second semester makes you so happy

boi thats a tardis

the design on his hoverboard looks like the aperture science logo

i paused to read the Floops label and it says "fried corn and sugar loop shaped breakfast substitute, net wt. 13 oz" ITS NOT EVEN A CEREAL ITS A BREAKFAST SUBSTITUTE IM C R Y I N G

listen i know hes technically scorpions dad but i dont think he can legally be in the dorm rooms

aww, thats sweet

i dont think gablet has an attached printer

gablet always sounds like shes mocking people

oh dear God its dolores umbridge

haha nerd

awesome no im gonna die

whenever carmen yells she sounds like link

ok so i didnt find a reason why she sounds like link but i DID find that theyre making a wherea waldo tv series so uhhhh thats fun

why does the cat have a bandaid

GABLET S T O P

OH!!!!!! ON THE WALL!!!!!!! ITS THE TUMBLR POST WITH THE FORK AND KNIFE ETIQUETTE PICTURE!!!!! YOU KNOW THE ONE!!!!!

oh no fart jokes

its even the basic fart sound effect

BAHAHAH MY PHONE VIBRATED AT THE SAME TIME HE FARTED THAT WAS WEIRD

oh no i hate him

stop SLURPING

uh yeah???? you heard them yelling about it

how??? does that work??? you cant just like catch electricity in a cup.... can you???? i havent studied it since 4th grade

oh worm??

goldies such a boomer

worm??

psi shouldnt be at the drawing board right now. he also shouldnt be confused

what happened to the lasers

wait nvm we havent gotten to that episode yet

ace is valid, dark is Scary

im gonna punch gablet in the face

that doesnt sound realistic

do you not have stairs??????

dont you mean inside AND out??

that flashlight did NOTHING

how did it die so fast?????

who else would you be talking to??

isnt that bowser from the mario movie we dont speak of??

i havent gotten a chance to tell yall but i absolutely love clemp. hes such a mood

hes the greatest spy

does it use a mini transmooker???? ig it doesnt bc gablet works but thatd be lit

SEE SHES IMMORTAL

me when i see something interesting

ME WHEN IM NOT ON MY PHONE

i dont think you can legally say that

you killed her

me

wow nice promo

also just???? bring a charger????? like youre the tech girl why do you not have one at all times

how?????? did you go so fast

machete electric bubbles??? nice

just task manager him

mother of all boards sounds like it could be a cuss...mother of all fuckers

also throwback to 1.7 when she says "his ai firewalled his motherboard" i keep expecting her to say "his ai firewalled this motherfucker"

yes i said keep ive watched that episode too many times to count

worm??

why did you giggle and make a flirty pose. are yall supposed to get together???

did you????? kill him????????? holy shit

2.2

thats what my dad does. he loves hospital corners

idc what it is you have a bazooka

ok if it was a spider id get it, australia has some deadly ones, but does it have deadly ants too???? like is that a Thing????

also ants in your room are gross

was that just a cameo??? i dont remember what happens in this one

haha because he said grapevines and wine has dregs and wine is made of grapes

for the boys??? thats so cute

listen idc how evil you are EVERYONE should cry over otters

so one of the parents has a sister or sister in law named roxanna..... hmmm.......

if you dont use your turn signal h*ck u

hes gonna D I E

i just looked at my shoe and i think theres blood on it???? what the h*ck

suspicious??? about.... what???? having fears???? not being perfect?????

juni that was awful wording

JUNI WHAT DID YOU D O TO HIM

like i know what he DID but the way it plays out makes it seem like something significant

i thought his name was heavy meddle not.... deth metal???? thats how the subtitles spell it

hahah me

he sounds like bling bling boy

yeah ik im a fool thanks for reminding me

what are you gonna do??? kill juni????

POOR WORD CHOICE JUNI

oh he gives exactly 0 h*cks

a shoe doesnt make that sound

crack bugs?????

see thats why you dont mess with things

im a god among boys??????? what????

did you... kill them????????????

thats any australian person

theyre so stupid i love them

good i hate her

i thought the gunk just like... disappeared from the guitar but actually it shot off

he died... 😔

uhh.... yeah????? was it not obvious?????

me when i have 5 dollars

[diviinitism-a]

 (  @diviinitas )      ⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯      ❛        1, 7, 11, 36, 44, 50      ❜

End of Year Meme

First things first, did you have a good year?

KINDA but I'm definitely finishing it as a great year!! Had a super fucking messy break up in the middle of the summer and that was fucking rough, got hit by a car, fell into a funk for a couple weeks here and there but I'm alive!! And my year has only been improved since then.

Which fashion trends did you love?

Turtlenecks came back into fashion, where I'm at, for the most part, so that was fun. As a person who owns 10+ of the suckers it was kinda fun seeing them come back ig? I personally never had anything against them but my family hated the fact I had so goddamn many and wore them all the time asdfggkl

What album came out and has been on heavy rotation since then?

UHHHhhhh nothing came out. And I don't realy listen to the radio to hear their heavy rotation songs but personally, for me, I've been bopping out to Blue Öyester Cult, Shinedown, Akira Yamaoka, and Hozier!!

Who wasn’t as important to you this year as they were last year?

My now ex and the entirety of my family assddfghh. I just stopped caring abt what they thought bc like. They Were Not Right. And it's helped my mental health a lot.

Did your opinion of anyone change for the better?

Not really asdfgh.

What do you wish for yourself?

Besides my long list of personal goals, I really want to become a bigger part of the rpc! Not in the I want more followers way - I just want to get a musing and/or meme blog set up, start getting more involved, set up a positivity blog and whatnot! Last year, there was an rper on here who did a secret santa exchange, but I think they deactivated? So next year, I'd love to run one if no one else does.

Personally, I need to stop worrying about weight and that shit and just focus on recovering from what I'm recovering from. It's pretty simple but I know it'll take a lot of work.