#so unlikely to get the standard Just Diet About It and Come Back Next Year “advice”

[lurkiestvoid]

I couldn't sleep but I have Shit To Do Today that I can't risk missing so I am mainlining caffeine. it's 10:30am and my chest is full of hummingbirds. This is maybe fine

[surveillance-0011]

TBOI Headcanons: Horsemen

Death

He/him

He’s...nice. Not a good person by any means but he’s the most polite of the bunch. Kind of strange though. Creepily calm, a bit sarcastic, and he has a pretty morbid view on the world.

Reserved and usually grumpy. He can be rather chipper off-duty, though. Putting up with the others takes a lot of energy from him.

Tired....

A bit neurotic but good at coming off as a down-to-earth guy.

He’s the most book-smart of the bunch and he’s fairly wise. A bit emotionally stunted, but he tries his best to be mature and make the right choices.

Death is more than a bit nihilistic and pessimistic. He has a hard time just... caring, mostly about himself.

Not to say he’s completely apathetic, he can be pretty empathetic but he tries not to act on that too much because if he did his job would have broken him by now.

He likes to think he’s got it all under control, but he does not. He’s more prone to pettiness and stupid decisions than he’d like to admit.

That being said he’s been pretty good with like. Growing and maturing though. He’s changed more than he realizes in just in the past.... decade or so ago. A bit of a late start for an immortal but hey at least he’s slightly less of a scumbag.

It’s usually not easy to anger him unless he’s really tired or something’s already set him off. When something does piss him off badly he’s a bit prone to freaking out. He’s not very good at handling his emotions. 

Sees his own job as a necessary evil, because hey, someone’s gotta do it.

Interested in botany/gardening, as well as literature.

Genuinely nice- or at least polite- to the kids when he’s not supposed to be murdering them. He sees no reason to go out of his way to do so, especially since unwarranted cruelty towards others has only bit him in the ass.

Famine’s older brother. The two have always had each other’s backs.

Diligent, and always considers the logistics to things instead of acting on emotion alone.

Protective of the other horsemen.

Pretty short tbh

His horse’s name is Chili.

Famine

She/he (bigender). You can use both interchangeably or only use one set, she doesn’t care. Fine with they/them too but it’s never really clicked w/ him enough to be preferred.

Usually prefers more masculine terms (brother, sir, mr...) but fine with anything.

.Flips between bouncing off the walls and having no energy whatsoever.

Impulsive, she’s got terrible judgement and has the most idiotic of ideas sometimes.

Fairly easygoing, tries to forgive and forget and doesn’t let little transgressions get to her

Actually pretty damn sad. Needs some self care but never looks after herself.

I mean she’s optimistic and usually happy but like. There’s always just a bit of sadness, you know? He’s dealt with a lot and it’s definitely taken its toll on him.

Disaster Lesbian

Tries to be a graceful loser but she can get a bit more competitive than she’d like to admit.

Has a hard time relating to others and considering how they feel, at least when it comes to anything more complex than “bad thing happened now I’m sad/mad” He’s a drifter by nature, always onto the next big thing for a quick thrill.

Eats a lot. It’s never enough.

Plants and a good deal of food will decay if she touches them, or even gets too close to them.

Like his brother he has some interest in nature. Famine is more on the adventurous side, though. She’s tried to live off the land a few times with varying success.

Named her horse Frisk

Pestilence

He/him

Calm, quiet, but also a pessimistic jackass.

Always in a bad mood. I mean, he’s permanently sick with just about everything contagious and deadly. You’d be grumpy, too!

Surprisingly high pain tolerance. A good deal of his nerves have probably just.. shut down or something. Or maybe he’s just numb to everything after a lifetime of pain.

Sleeps a lot

Dislikes his situation a lot, but doesn’t mind the company of the others.

Lazarus is terrified of this dude. The other kids are mostly grossed out or annoyed by him.

Likes to be alone.

Fairly smart, but comes off as absent minded bc he’s pretty much too sick to function. He slips up a lot and he’s pretty damn clumsy

Probably the most rational of the bunch, when he’s not in airplane mode. 

He’s also got a fairly strong moral compass. He doesn’t really like fighting the kids unlike War and Famine. Or just having to go up against people in general. Hell he hates the fact people get sick because of him. At the very least Pest has higher standards and is fairly transparent

But that isn’t to say he’s a good person. Yeah he doesn’t go out of his way to hurt others for shits and giggles and He’s Not Conquest but he doesn’t ever object to any of the shit the kids are put through and well. Yknow he still does kill them. He will also encourage some of War’s antics when it’s against someone he dislikes.

Tries to be as supportive as he can for the others. He knows he can’t do too much without overexerting so he tries to be encouraging and comforting as he can.

This compassion usually isn’t extended to humans, though.

Not very emotive, the only emotions he ever really expresses would be disdain and mild concern.

Not very fond of Conquest but they don’t hate each other. They actually work together well, too.

Friends with Mahalath. They’re pretty close!

His horse’s name is Moses.

War

He/it

He’s not very friendly, he’s pretty defensive and always on edge.

Out of all the horsemen, he’s probably the one closest with the Beast.

Lots of scars n injuries, it’s practically stitched together

One gold tooth

Impulsive, prefers solving issues through violence than through reason.

He can be fairly clever, though.

Intentionally angers/upsets others, likes causing problems and ruining things for people.

Desires wealth and power

Gets burnt out pretty quickly.

Emotional, insecure, and sensitive, and he hates this part of him. Definitely overcompensates for it.

Explosive temper, quite literally. Catches fire when upset and explodes if it’s more intense. Damage done to him also makes it happen. It’s not entirely voluntary but can be held off, and his “sobbing” sprite is him doing exactly that (but he’s probably also trying not to cry lmao). In the Ultra War fight, however...

Its daily routine leaves a lot to be desired. It wakes up, goes to work, then it goes home and just. Sits and rots.

Also, his diet is god awful. Please just eat a fruit or vegetable for once maybe you’d feel better goddamn.

He cannot remember if his horse is actually a horse or not but uhh he named her Bellum.

Conquest

He/they.

High and mighty sort of attitude. Can be very selfish. Stubborn, set in his ways. Gets defensive if you call him out or tell him he’s wrong.

Gay + nonbinary but in the closet (and denial) about both of those things. They’re trying to unlearn years’ worth of internalized bigotry.

Used to be worse, now trying to unlearn his toxic behaviors. But he’s still awful.

Doesn’t remember anything before their death. However they’ve held very strong Christian (specifically Catholic) beliefs all their life and they have a pretty black and white way of thinking.

Very cold and clinical. He has a bit of a temper but there’s a sort of calmness to everything he does even when he’s pissed.

Just as argumentative and aggressive as War but like more of a threat.

The others call him Connie sometimes, especially Death, who practically almost always calls him by this nickname.

Doesn’t harbor ill will towards Pestilence. They might have been overshadowed, but it’s not Pestilence’s own fault. If anything, being out of the spotlight has been good for Conquest, even if they do miss the attention sometimes. The only reason the two dislike each other is because their personalities clash.

Now if there’s anyone he hates that would be the Headless Horseman. Fuck that guy amiright

Very protective of Death. The two are close, Death is probably the only person who is consistently nice to him.

Utterly terrified of needles (hypodermic, not sewing needles, though he’s not good with sharp objects tbh) and medical stuff makes him anxious

Seems very... off. Just weird vibes but no one can pin point what about him is wrong.

Oh uh and his horse’s name is Josephine.

[krreader]

BTS scenario → dating an “average” girl.

pairing: bts x reader fandom: bts  warnings: / genre: angst ; fluff  word count: 1.6k+

a/n: let me start off by saying that I really don’t like to use the word average, because I think everyone is special in their own way. now, I wasn’t sure whether you wanted this to be angsty or not, but I decided to mix it up and throw a little bit of both in there, which I hope you enjoy :)

kim seokjin

“I don't think I'll be a good work-out-buddy, Jin,” you nervously looked around, “And besides, people are looking at me.”

“Hey,” he quickly grabbed your chin and made you look into his eyes, “You pay attention to nobody but me, okay? None of these people here matter, only you and I do. And you work out as much as you can and once it becomes too hard or you don't feel like it anymore, you'll stop.”

You had often complained to Jin about your body, but had been too afraid to go into a gym on your own. So he had offered to go with you to one of the private ones that a lot of idols often used and to help you with the exercising.

It was a good deal at first, but now that you were actually here, you began to realize that you knew jack-shit about working out and that you'd probably make a fool out of yourself.

However, the moment that you started, you forgot everything around you.

Jin made this day extremely fun and every time you 'messed up', your boyfriend turned it into a funny situation that had you laugh and not blush from embarrassment.

Others were probably judging you, but you didn't notice.

All you could see was this man in front of you, loving you unconditionally the way you were now, but wanting to help you on your journey to self-love in any way he could.

min yoongi

Yoongi had once been so worried about what would happen once the media would find out about you and him, especially because of your previous hatred for yourself.

But you've worked on those issues. You've worked hard to love yourself the way you were, to accept that you'd never have that flat stomach because – surprise – your organs had to find a place somewhere in your body. To accept that you'd forever have acne scarring, which now reminded you of the hard times and made you appreciate the current, good times.

So whenever there was yet another blog post of a jealous fan bashing one of the things that you used to hate about yourself, you just nodded to yourself and said: “They're probably going through their own struggles right now. One day, they will get over it.”

Jealousy was a bitch, you've experienced that first hand.

But as you've finally come to accept yourself, you've realized that you had no reason to be jealous of others anymore.

You were happy with yourself.

Yoongi leaned against the door frame and watched you put your phone down, then grab your cup of coffee and watch the rain pour outside.

And all he could think of was: “You're the most beautiful woman on this planet. Thank you for finally having realized that yourself.”

jung hoseok

Hoseok walked into the living room after having taken a shower and found you scrolling through your Instagram, liking pictures of several girls that he was sure you had never seen or met before.

All girls that looked a certain way. ‘Perfect’, as you used to call them.

With a heavy sigh, he sat down next to you and said: “We talked about this. You don't need to look like this, you're pretty the way you are, you know?”

“I do,” you smiled at him, “But I still think they're pretty. And I know how important it is to tell someone they're beautiful. You never know what they’re struggling with about themselves at the moment.”

You've come a long way.

Two years ago, you would have looked at these pictures and beaten yourself up over it. You would have gone on a diet the next day, the hairdresser the day after and the dermatologists soon thereafter.

But now? Now you could look at these pictures and leave compliments under them that the original owner of the photo always liked and thanked you for, because as you said, you never knew what somebody was struggling with about their appearance at that time and something as simple as a compliment from a stranger could mean the world.

“I'm so proud of you,” Hoseok whispered and pulled you against him.

“Me too,” you grinned happily.

jung hoseok

Once upon a time you had thought that if you wanted to date Kim Namjoon, you had to be some sort of prodigy.

But, newsflash, you weren't.

And while you had been more than upset about this years ago and thought that you were not worthy of being with him, you had now come to accept that you were normal.

And normal was good.

Normal, was what Namjoon loved the most about you, after your kindness and your warmth that you had for the people you loved and cared for. He didn't need you to be special by playing some instrument perfectly, because you were already special enough for him for just being you.

And as you were lying in bed and he was running his fingers through your hair, he whispered: “I love you more than I can say.. you know that right?”

It surprised you, but you still smiled, “I do. I love you too. And..-” you pushed yourself up a little to look him in the eyes and chuckled, “I love me too.”

It was a little inside joke. Something that Namjoon made you say over and over again when you had troubles accepting yourself once again. And now, you could say that sentence and honestly mean it.

And man, he was so proud of that.

park jimin

It really wasn't easy being with him when he was this perfect specimen of humanity and you were – in your eyes – the worst it could offer.

“You look gorgeous,” Jimin smiled happily when you walked out of the changing room, but you weren't quite as happy with yourself.

“It doesn't fit properly.”

“Hm, I think it does,” Jimin got up and took a closer look at it, “Zipper is up, straps aren't too tight.. I think it's good!”

“No, I mean.. this,” you pointed at your belly, “I told you I can't wear a dress as tight as this, I don't have your stomach,” it came out a lot more spiteful than you intended for it to.

But he didn’t take it to heart, thankfully 

“And thank god for that,” Jimin let out a laugh, then grabbed your chin and made you look at him, “My stomach reminds me of the nights in which I had to starve myself to look like people expect me to look. Your stomach reminds me of how healthy you are and how I don't have to worry about you.”

You looked into his eyes for a moment, then you let out a sigh, your shoulders dropping, “Sorry, I shouldn't have brought it up..-”

“Don't apologize. If anything, apologize to yourself for always being so hard on you and always finding an imperfection that isn't one,” he kissed your forehead, “You're so beautiful, angel,” he whispered, nearly making you cry.

kim taehyung

Taehyung could feel that there was something wrong today just from the way you texted him back. You didn't put any of your normally used emoji's after your texts, your answers were short and the amount of time it took you to even reply, was suspicious.

At first, he had thought that maybe something that he had done had upset you, but the more he thought about it, the more he came to the conclusion that that couldn't be. When re-reading your goodnight message from last night, everything was normal.

So it must be something else.

Once his break started, he decided that he'd spend it at your place and see what it was that was troubling you. He hadn't told you that he'd be coming, so you were looking at him, not in surprise, but shock.

“What are you doing here?!” you immediately turned around and scurried back into your apartment, leaving Taehyung to close the door behind himself with furrowed eyebrows.

“What's wrong?”

“Nothing, just.. I don't have a good day today, okay?”

Your boyfriend placed the bag of take-away on the floor and then walked over to you, gently turning you around by your shoulder to look at you, only to see that issue seemed to be something so trivial, that it made him let out a heavy sigh.

“Really, (Y/N)?”

“It's so ugly. I couldn't stand it anymore, so I just.. popped them. And now I look even worse than before and I hate it!”

You've been struggling with your skin for a while, had often gone to dermatologists that Taehyung had recommended to you, but while it did get a little better, you didn't have the skin that he had. And that is what you wanted. A journey that would take longer than four months, however. And... well, you were impatient. 

“How many times do I need to tell you that pimples are natural? That having acne is nothing to be ashamed about?”

“Easy for you to say, looking like your skin was made out of glass.”

“And you know how much I need to do for it. How many times I need to get treatments,” his hands slid down until he could hold yours, “You're still beautiful to me. Pimples won't change that. But popping them isn't good for your skin, it's only going to make it worse. You need to let it heal, as hard as it is.”

Again, this was easy for him to say and not so easy for you to do. You've had this conversation before and you were sure that you'd have it again and again.

But you were glad to hear these words. Because at that moment, it was what you needed to feel a little better.

jeon jeongguk

It wasn't hard to figure out that you never wanted to come to these dinners because you were uncomfortable around the other members' girlfriends. They were, what society would consider, 'the standard'. They were, what women were told to look like. They were, what people thought idols’ girlfriends should look like.

And every time you joined these dinners, you realized that you were none of these things.

You weren't the perfect woman, unlike the others.

Or so you believed.

“You're home early,” you stated as you closed the book in your hands, “Wasn't it fun?”

“It was,” Jeongguk nodded, taking off his shoes, before falling onto the couch and placing his head in your lap, smiling as you immediately began to brush your fingers through his hair, “But being here with you is better.”

He could spend his days trying to convince you that you were what he wanted, exactly the way you were now.

Or, he could simply show you.

And he opted for option number two.

[rapeculturerealities]

Long before she decided to help others eat better by becoming a dietitian, Jessica Wilson learned that the profession was unlikely to offer much to people like her.

Growing up as a Black girl in a mostly white area of Sacramento, Calif., she was bullied for her size and subjected to unpleasant visits with dietitians, who taught portion control with the aid of unappetizing plastic models of green beans and chicken breasts.

In her dietetics program at the University of California, Davis, Ms. Wilson was the only Black student. A single day was devoted to what the curriculum called “ethnic diets.” “It was not, ‘These are interesting and awesome,’” she recalled. “It is, ‘These are why these diets are bad. Next class.’”

Mexican food was dismissed as greasy. Indian food was heavy. Ms. Wilson was taught to prescribe a bland “kale-and-quinoa” diet. When she started treating patients — including many who, like her, are people of color or identify as queer — she learned how much those identities informed their perspectives on health, and how little she’d been taught about that.

“It makes people feel so guilty for not being able to eat what Goop would recommend,” said Ms. Wilson, 38. “I was no longer able to use the tools that had been given to me in school with good conscience.”

As the coronavirus pandemic has made Americans more aware of their health and eating habits, many have turned to registered dietitians like Ms. Wilson (or to nutritionists, who are not always required to obtain a specific education or certification). Yet the advice they get can sometimes seem more tailored to some past era than to the motley, multicultural nation the United States is in 2020.

In recent years — and particularly in the last several months, amid the national discussion about race — many dietitians have begun speaking out and reimagining the practice in a more inclusive way, often without institutional support.

Today, Ms. Wilson counsels many people of color on eating a healthy diet based on the foods they grew up with and love. Hazel Ng, 48, who runs a private practice in Alhambra, Calif., has created handouts for her Chinese clients that showcase produce found in Asian grocery stores, like bitter melon and lychees

In June, Sherene Chou, 36, a dietitian with a private practice in Los Angeles, organized a group letter to the Academy of Nutrition and Dietetics — the largest and most powerful organization for food and nutrition professionals — outlining steps it should take to address systemic racism in the field, including antiracism training and more support for people of color. Leaders of numerous dietetics groups lent their support, signing the letter on behalf of 70,000 practitioners and students.

Many of these dietitians say the academy’s research, programs and articles ignore non-Western cuisines, or imply that they are unhealthy. They feel the profession places too much emphasis on consuming less and not enough on understanding individual eating habits. And, they add, it perpetuates an ideal of thinness and gender normativity that can exclude different body types and identities.

“It is a good-old-girls’ club where, as a person of color, you have to do so much to be invited,” said Jessica Jones, a dietitian in Richmond, Calif., and a founder of the inclusive dietetics website Food Heaven.

In response to these criticisms, the academy said it is working hard to broaden its ranks and resources to better reflect different cultures.

“Like other professions in health care and countless other fields, nutrition and dietetics has for many years experienced underrepresentation by persons of color in its membership and leadership ranks,” it said in a statement last week. “The academy knows change will not happen overnight. Still, we are making real progress that will create permanent change in our organization, our profession and our communities.”

The group is influential in setting the United States Department of Agriculture dietary guidelines that Americans are urged to follow; its members make up half of the 20-member committee that oversees those recommendations. In a July report, the committee acknowledged that the dietary approaches it studies don’t “qualitatively address cultural variations in intake patterns,” yet said the resulting guidelines allow a “tremendous amount of flexibility” that allows them to be tailored to an individual’s cultural and taste preferences.

The recipe database on MyPlate, the agriculture department’s healthy-eating website, includes 98 dishes classified as “American,” but just 28 “Asian” recipes and nine “Middle Eastern” ones. Though it lists 122 “Latin American/Hispanic” recipes, they include dishes like a “skinny pizza” made with tortillas. The Asian recipes include “Oriental Rice” and “Oriental Sweet and Sour Vegetables.”(A spokesman for the department said that “expanding the recipe database and other MyPlate consumer resources to reflect more diversity is one of our top priorities.”)

If the options seem narrow, they may begin with the narrowness of the profession. More than 71 percent of the nation’s roughly 106,000 registered dietitians are non-Hispanic white, according to the academy’s Commission on Dietetic Registration. Nearly 84 percent are women.

Entry requirements are steep: Practitioners must earn a degree from an accredited program, complete an internship (sometimes unpaid) or a supervised learning program, and pass a registration exam with a $200 entrance fee. Starting in 2024, a graduate degree will be required to take the exam.

“This is an expensive profession, with no guarantee that you are going to have a high salary,” said Lisa Sasson, a professor in the department of nutrition and food studies at New York University. She called the new graduate-degree mandate “unconscionable” and “an even greater barrier to people of color in our profession.”

The academy said that its charitable foundation provided more than $500,000 in scholarships and grants from 2017 to 2019 “for diverse individuals within the field,” and that those funds continue to grow.

Internships are highly competitive, and some even require the intern to pay. Alice Figueroa, 33, who runs a private practice in the East Village of Manhattan, said she struggled to afford food during her internship, even as she was advising others how to eat. Evelyn Crayton, 74, who was the academy’s first Black president, said many of the people in charge of matching students with internships are white, and may be more likely to select applicants who look like them.

Funding for dietetics programs at many historically Black colleges and universities, including Fort Valley State University and Grambling State University, has been cut since the 1970s. The number of Black dietitians fell by 18 percent, to 1,107, from 1998 to 2019, according to the academy’s Accreditation Council for Education in Nutrition and Dietetics.

Even when Dr. Crayton was president of the academy, in 2015 and 2016, she felt out of step with its other leaders. “I have heard that behind my back they called me an angry Black woman, because I raised questions,” she said. Her nominations of Black dietitians for leadership roles, she added, were frequently snubbed.

Told of her comments, the academy responded, “We were not aware of this until now, and we are very saddened to hear that Evelyn was subjected to these inexcusable statements. They do not reflect the academy’s core values and we are moving swiftly to investigate this matter.”

The profession’s exclusivity goes beyond race. Kai Iguchi, 28, a dietitian working at Rogers Behavioral Health in Oconomowoc, Wis., didn’t feel comfortable coming out as nonbinary to graduate-school classmates. “When the program itself as a culture is very cisgender, thin, white and female,” they said, “it is hard to be different and succeed.”

Mx. Iguchi said what they learned at school did little to address the unique problems that transgender and nonbinary clients face — being misgendered by their dietitians and family members, or feeling discomfort with overtly feminine imagery on health materials. Adult transgender people are also at high risk of developing eating disorders, according to a 2019 study by the Stanford University School of Medicine.

Even some dietitians who teach the standard curriculum find it wanting. “I have reached my limit with my textbook,” said Maya Feller, an adjunct professor in nutrition at New York University, adding that it doesn’t take into account social factors that often explain why people of color are disproportionally affected by health issues.

She said she was also unhappy with educational resources like MyPlate, which recommends meals like salmon, brown rice and broccoli, but not the curried chana and doubles served by her mother, who grew up in Trinidad. (After her interview for this article, Ms. Feller was hired as a consultant to help make MyPlate more inclusive.)

“If I saw that plate and then looked at my doubles, I would be like, ‘Well, my food is no good.’”

Ms. Feller, 43, tries instead to promote an “ongoing and consistent education around cultural humility” — not telling patients what they can’t eat, but considering the foods they have access to, and embracing, not stigmatizing, their cultural preferences.

It rankles Ryan Bad Heart Bull, 36, a Native American dietitian who works with the Oglala Sioux Tribe in Pine Ridge, S.D., that many of his peers praise the nutritional value of traditional Indigenous ingredients like salmon and bison, without understanding how federal government policies have made it harder for Native Americans to hunt and forage on their own land. To be ignorant of this cultural and historical context, “and then to turn around and say bison meat is one of the best meats you can eat and here are the ways you can incorporate it into your diet,” he said, “it is insulting and saddening.”

In 2019, he published a guide for the American Indian Cancer Foundation to educate Native cancer survivors about the nutritional value of their traditional foods.

Diksha Gautham, 27, a nutritionist in San Francisco, tells her mostly South Asian-American clientele that a healthy diet can include palak paneer and aloo tikki. As a child, she said, she harbored a blind perception that anything that wasn’t dry chicken and broccoli, including the dal and rice her mother cooked, “was bad for me.” No nutritional database she has encountered includes Indian ingredients, so she created her own guides to healthful Indian food.

A Toronto dietitian, Nazima Qureshi, 29, has self-published “The Healthy Ramadan Guide” with her husband, Belal Hafeez, a personal trainer. It includes meal plans that adhere to fasting guidelines, with recipes like stuffed dates and za’atar roasted chicken, and exercises to give people energy going into daily prayers.

Some of Dalina Soto’s Hispanic and Asian clients in the Philadelphia area have been told by other dietitians that they can’t eat white rice. “They shut down,” she said. “Either they go way to the extreme, where they are no longer eating any of their cultural foods, or the other side is, ‘I am just not going to manage my disease.’”

“My goal is to bring them in the middle,” said Ms. Soto, 32. She’ll suggest a salad alongside their rice and beans.

Still, many of these practitioners feel frustrated as they try to nudge the dietetic establishment toward change.

The profession is governed by the academy’s board. One subsidiary organization, the Commission on Dietetic Registration, sets professional requirements and fees; another, the Accreditation Council, certifies programs. Together, these entities and their majority-white leadership act as gatekeepers, their critics argue, limiting deep-rooted change.

The academy, which has about 100,000 members, funds research and hosts the largest annual conference for dietitians, the Food & Nutrition Conference & Expo. In 2016, it announced the Second Century Initiative, an effort to expand its reach and teachings around the globe.

The academy has had a diversity and inclusion committee since 1987. But, like all the academy’s committees, it is filled by volunteers. Teresa Turner, 37, a member from 2015 until May, said the academy offers the panel few “resources or benchmarks.” “Its only purpose,” Ms. Turner said, “is to make the academy look like they are doing something.”

The academy denied those assertions, saying the committee plays an active role, recommending strategies to recruit people from underrepresented groups to join the profession, and the academy, and promote their advancement.

A group that calls itself Audit the Academy (whose members include Ms. Turner, Ms. Figueroa and Ms. Chou) said the academy research it has seen is largely conducted by white dietitians studying nondiverse populations; if they study communities of color, they often do so from a white perspective. Members also see little representation of transgender and nonbinary people.

“If we are invisible in the research,” said Sand Chang, 42, an Oakland, Calif., psychologist who specializes in the transgender health and eating disorders, “we are going to be invisible in assessment and treatment.”

The academy, however, said it “offers materials, programs and educational opportunities to help its members provide care to a diverse array of clients,” including articles about treating transgender individuals.

In June, the organization responded to pressure from disaffected members by committing to developing action plans to address inequities in the profession. It has created a new Diversity and Inclusion Advisory Group, and conducted virtual forums to hear the concerns of 126 randomly selected members.

Shannon Curtis, 30, a Houston dietitian who helped found a group called Dietitians for Change, attended one of the sessions. “Although it was empowering to know that we are not the only ones screaming about this,” she said, “it was kind of a waste of time, in my opinion, because I am not exactly confident that they will take this information and put it into an action plan they will actually act on.”

Other organizations have emerged to address the inequities in the profession, like Diversify Dietetics, founded in 2018 by Tamara Melton and Deanna Belleny. It offers resources like mentors and educational materials to help students of color pass the registration exam.

In response to criticisms that it is harder for nonwhite dietitians to succeed in the profession, the academy offered an interview with Kristen Gradney, a senior director at Our Lady of the Lake Children’s Hospital in Baton Rouge, La, and one of several registered dietitian nutritionists who speak on behalf of the academy.

Ms. Gradney, 40, said that while the academy “has really missed the mark” in preparing dietitians to deal with diverse populations, it is starting to make progress. Still, she said “true change” would probably not come from the academy, but from grass-roots initiatives like Diversify Dietetics, where she serves on the advisory board.

In 2018, Dr. Crayton, the academy’s past president, hosted a conference in Montgomery, Ala., where she lives, for World Critical Dietetics, an organization that champions a more inclusive approach to dietetics. Panels discussed the role that unconscious bias plays in education, and whether the registration exam was fair to all students.

Dr. Crayton took participants to the Edmund Pettus Bridge, in Selma, where in 1965, peaceful protesters marched for civil rights. “I could never have done that with the academy,” she said with a laugh. She said events like that could help pave a path toward sweeping change.

“I don’t know how to get to people’s hearts, but it is a heart thing,” she said. In a discipline that deals with such a deeply personal matter — one’s eating habits — “there has to be a change of heart, where people really feel empathy for groups who they are trying to include.”

[cherrywoes]

< entry 001:// prometheus in flesh >

                                        < 𝚘𝚙𝚎𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚐 .𝚑𝚝𝚖𝚕 𝚏𝚒𝚕𝚎...>

[The following is a recorded conversation between Senior Geneticist Ukai Keishin and Senior Biologist Takeda Ittetsu. It is narrated through a personal AI belonging to Takeda Ittetsu. After further review, this conversation has been classified for rank seven priority persons and has been archived.]

UKAI: This is… (He takes a puff of a cigarette. He sounds angry, petulant, and in a state of disbelief.) This is ridiculous. Who decided that this passed legislation? What need do we have for these—these things?

TAKEDA: (He coughs, perhaps out of nerves or anxiety. The shuffling of clothing and the scrape of a chair indicate that he has sat down beside Ukai.) You know what they said, just like I did, Keishin. Once it’s over, it’s done—we need to play cleanup crew afterwards.

UKAI: No one said anything about… (His finger slams into the table as he angrily points at something on the table near him. He doesn’t say the words aloud, fearing that someone will overhear him, perhaps his AI.) That. That is—I’ve spent years of my life with these things and—I can’t do that, Ittetsu. You know I can’t.

TAKEDA: I know. (He sounds sad.) But look on the bright side. Once this is done… (Previous interactions indicate that the slight swallowing sound prefaces nausea and purging.) We can leave this place and never come back. Right?

UKAI: (Hesitantly.) ...Right.

NECTAR CLUNG TO YOUR fingertips in crystal clear strings of sticky sweet euphoria. It spilled from the artificially enhanced flowers clustered in your lap and around your feet, the large, palm sized petals capturing globules of the precious liquid within their curved centers. It tasted sweet, flowery, and, above all, smelled divine; like camellias on the wind, or goldenrods in the spring. It ran down your arms and elbows and dripped down onto your thighs, running rivers down your calves to sluice between your toes, creating a crystal clear lake within your shadow and the chair you sat upon.

“Diet’s good.” The scientist standing outside your cage scribbled something on a bleach white piece of paper. It smelled acrid, a sting to your sensitive nose, and the ink was a bizarre scent, smelling almost like the oil that the older scientists rubbed into their skin to keep it from cracking and drying. “Though her metabolism is through the roof—I’m concerned something may have been missed in her genetic scan during incubation.”

You ignored the scientist, dropping the empty flower to your feet. Like it had been produced to do, it shriveled up and decomposed into a fine brown dust instantaneously, seeping into the biodegradable concrete to be absorbed as nutrients for the life system that kept your cage comfortable and at the right temperature for your body. You watched it shrink and wrinkle and disappear, rubbing your toe through the dust when it was done.

“I wouldn’t be surprised,” another scientist said, this one writing down something about your bone structure. “They’ve gotten so lazy in the gestation wing that you could probably slip a bomb in there and no one would notice until it had gone off. I’ll see what I can dig up about her records and genetic material.”

“You do that.” A fast scrawl again, the ink smell stronger this time. “At the rate she’s going, she’ll have eaten through an entire greenhouse before she’s through; let’s add some insects to her diet. Worms, maybe? Or crickets?”

You scrunched your nose and sighed. You hated worms, and crickets too. That didn’t stop them from trying to shove it down your throat every chance they got. They were adamant that it would help with your protein intake, but so far you’d only felt miserable and disgusted when you ate them, slurping them into your mouth obediently like the rest of your flock did. Perhaps with less enthusiasm, but your obedience couldn’t be questioned.

The lab you lived in was a kind of protective facility deep within the ground. They had taught you that the world above was scorched, hot and burnt by the sun and greenhouse gases; that the facility was the safest place to be while they planned to restructure the atmosphere and filter out the toxic fumes with specially made Morphlings—you wouldn’t even call them Morphlings, really, just a hybrid of humans and machines.

Morphlings—the real, true ones—were splices of human and a kind of animal. From birds, to insects, to carnivores, omnivores, or vegetarians, they had spliced them all; some in small amounts, or others, like yours, in large group spawnings that made it difficult to assert yourself over the crowd. You were one of the few who didn’t fit in with your group; the scientists assured you it was because hummingbirds were generally loners by nature, except for their mates, of which you were too young to have—in Morphling standards, you understood, anyway. In human terms, you were old enough; even in bird terms, you were old enough. But Morphlings didn’t reach full maturity until they were twenty-three, supposedly, and you were only two years shy of that goal.

Not that you cared, not really. You had a belly full of nectar at all times, insects to snack on whenever you wished, a few Hummingbird friends you could barely call your ‘friends’, and three humans analyzing you at all times, monitoring your vital signs to make sure you weren’t getting ill or growing some unnatural mutation like so many of the other Morphlings. The last one to have a mutation, you’d heard, had been a little crow Morphling, but any more than that was muddy, usually by default. Any information you heard was from the pieces you gathered from the scientists’ whispers, bland conversations really, and the idle chatter in the canteen in the carnivore’s circle where you weren’t privy.

“Ah, no, no insects for the rest of the week,” the scientist corrected. You looked over curiously, fingers fisting in the petals of a new flower and puncturing the membrane that held the globules of nectar within. You were already full, but you regretted the waste almost immediately when you dropped it to the floor. “They’re putting her through the Trials today.”

Dread crept into your belly. 

The Trials were almost like torture sessions keyed in onto prey surviving predators; for Morphlings, it was much more extreme. You’d heard from several survivors that they were forced to push themselves past the limit to survive whatever carnivorous or omnivorous Morphling they’d put in with them, even being forced to watch their friends get eaten when they got caught. It was supposedly to test their resilience and stamina, but all it really was—at least to you—was a way to cull the flock.

And you were next.

The scientist noticed you staring and smiled, tapping his pen against the frame of your cage mockingly. “Heard me, did you? It won’t change anything. You might as well prepare yourself before you go in. It’s likely you won’t make it out. None of the hummingbird morphs do.”

You wondered how easy it would be to shove your hands through the gaps in the bars and break his neck against the metal. It couldn’t be that difficult; you’d seen some carnivores do it before when they were getting ready for euthanization. Those were the more genetically anomalous ones, but you could probably do it; morphling genes allowed for unusual strength, even for a hummingbird. Despite your hollow bones, you could probably at least get to his eyes if you tried hard enough.

But that wasn’t typical of a Hummingbird morphling. You chalked it up to the human genes in your genome sequence; they always had said you had more ‘human’ in you than the rest, usually spitefully. Other than the two nice men who monitored your changes and such, the rest of them were foul creatures, miserable being stuck in an underground bunker. Humans typically were violent when they were cooped up in small places for extended periods of time, and you, well, you didn’t like being in a cage very much, unlike your fellow hummingbird morphs.

“Whatever you say,” you laughed, rolling your eyes, and got up off the stool. You sauntered your way back into the depths of your cell, vanishing behind a thick curtain of synthetic silk dyed a deep sea green.

The scientist cleared his throat when he spoke to the other man. “Did you know hummingbird morphs could talk?”

Oh. You frowned, bringing your fingers to your mouth, your previous anger forgotten. Experimentally, you flexed the vocal cords in your throat, capable of only chirps of affirmatives and negatives, and felt more—different. They were different.

Interesting... Interesting indeed.

                   < 𝚋𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚏𝚒𝚗𝚐 / 𝚊𝚕𝚙𝚑𝚊 𝚛𝚎𝚐𝚒𝚜𝚝𝚛𝚢 / 𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚛𝚢 𝟶𝟶𝟸 >

                    𝚗𝚘𝚝𝚒𝚏𝚒𝚎𝚍 𝚙𝚎𝚛𝚜𝚘𝚗𝚗𝚎𝚕: status: open.

[fatelotusorder]

Name: Elizabeth Tudor

Others  Names : Good  Queen Bess  , Liz  ,Lizabeth  ,Beth

Class: Ruler

other  Classes He  Qualifies For - Berserker(All Tudors Except Ed) , Caster, Saber(All English Ruler Qualify  for this class Bess Finds  this  dumb ), Lancer , Shielder

Alignment: Lawful Good

Voice Actor:Mitsuo Iwata (Sunny from Toriko , Hes  Also The Second Voice  For Ivanvok in One piece )

https://youtu.be/76jZj7Ymy9Y

Gender: Male  Likes: Sweets, Fashion , Beauty  in general

Dislikes: Don't call Him  Fat or  A Drag Queen , Dentists  , His Sister and  Father

Tags:King  ,English , Divine  ,Humaniod ,Servant ,Weak to Enuma Elish  NaturalEnemy: Mary Tudor  , Herny  the 8th  , Gilgamesh,Ozymandias  , Aslaung  , Medb

Cards: Buster,Art , Arts ,Arts Quick Active Skills:

Unwavering  Charisma (Increases Attack for  all Allies  and   Increases Allies  Defense  For 3 turn)

Ageless Beauty- Chance  to  Charm  All  Enemies  for 1 Turn ,and Seal their  NP for  Three  Turns

Glory of the Crown-Increase NP Gain and Apply Damage Cut to all allies for 3 turns

Passive Skills:

Rage of  Tudors - Increases allies   Attack  When Bess  is on  the Felid    Magic Resistance  

NP: Tudor Rose- Protection From the  Queen -  Arts-  Bess  Gives  a  Pray out  to God

,"when wars and seditions with grievous persecutions have vexed almost all kings and countries round about me, my reign hath been peaceable, and my realm a receptacle to thy afflicted Church. The love of my people hath appeared firm, and the devices of my enemies frustrate"

Before Similar  To  Neros A Room  Appears  Around  Him   as He Walks Towards  The  Throne , He Smiles as  Bess Sits  Down on  the Throne   And Snaps His Fingers   and a Light illuminates the Room. Give Invincibility for two hits and a 3 turn Heal Regen for Allies and Lowers Defense  for all Enemies .

Biography:

Elizabeth Tudor known By Many Aliases the last  Ruler of the  Tudor Dynasty in  England  , who Unlike her predecessors Before Enjoyed a Long Reign of about 44 years. Although Documented as a Woman in the History , The "Queen" was Actually  Male, Born with the name Arthur Tudor after his fathers late brother  but then Why Didn't  Bess take the  Throne  next Instead of   Edward he  was the Son Henry always wanted  .

Truth is  Henry  Declared  Bess as one  of His Daughters as Bess wasn't the son Henry wanted and Henry  didn't  consider   Bess Manly Enough  to  considered   His Next Heir   and  so Hid the Fact He Had another  Son by raising Bess  as  Girl and Eventually Declared Bess along with His Sister Mary as   Illegitimate  as Soon as He  had Edward .

Bess despite  His Arrogance, Flamboyancy, and Confidence in himself.Bess  Dose question if he truly a Man as He went through Great lengths to Hide the fact that he wasn't a Woman (even pulling an Artoria and giving himself breasts temporarily ) Mainly for political Reasons and so he didn't suffer the Similar short Rules of His Sister. Not for the Reasons that Modern Day people do it so His pronouces are He/ Them.

-—-

Summoned: "Elizabeth Tudor ,Servant Class : Ruler ,Is it Nice to be in the presence of a Queen  ,Master"

Bond 1:  Its  not  Everyday  Your  around a Queen My  Master ,Smile ~

Bond 2:Hm ,your an Interesting  person  to Say the Least

Bond 3: Your orders Master ,I’ll Do anything you  ask me  to.~"

Bond 4: Hehe ,You Remind Me  of  Someone Very  Special to  me in life. Who is this person? Your not ready for that just yet

Bond 5: this special person , Well his Name was  Robert Dudley , I  had a crush on him for the longest time .

Dialogue 1:"Why  Do you Stare At  me like that ? ,Master ? Is it Because I'm So Breathtakingly beautiful ... or Is it Something Eles?"

Dialogue 2: "D-dentist, Master ,I D-don't need a Dentist"

Dialogue 3:"Master ,This Scale Has to Be wrong I can't  have gained  weight ,I Cut  back on Sweets"

Dialogue 4: "Some Days I wonder Why I was Summoned as a Ruler I'm Not a Saint  or anything ,Just  a person Who believed that God was  on His Side protecting Him. "

(If you Have  Henry the 8th) " Master  , Don't   Compare me  to that  Boar  in Humans  Clothing  ,He dosen't  Deserve the Comparison "

(if You Have Mary Tudor ) "Mary ,Your Here  ...M-master We need to  Talk"

(if You Have Francis Drake )

"  Don't Go Telling People , How Big My (temporary) Breasts  Were! and they  Were Not  Bigger than  Raikou's Cow Udders ! "

(if You Have Ivan  the Terrible ) "You  Look Just as   Ugly and Horrid as  that Letter  You wrote Me"

(If You Have  Ragnar or Judge Vinsmoke )" You  Remind me  of my  Father   ,That is a  Bad  thing "

(if you  have  Sanji,Before whole Cake ) - Okama! Who are you To Say whether I'm  an  Okama or not  , I'll  break You  Arms  Clean off!

(if you  have  Sanji,After  Whole Cake ) "I seem We were Similar Situations, Your father  wanted to mold  you Into a Warrior that lacked Empathy and Compassion and Hated your Passion of Cooking  for his Ridiculous Standards on  What Royalty should and Shouldn't do.. ...Huh ,but I  thought You  didn't  like ugly ass Okamas.~"

(if you Have  Ivar the Boneless Before  Rwby Event) - "he's  the shortest  Viking I've  Seen  and  his Legs Flop around like  if he   was a Ragdoll , He's Kinda  Adorable looking  He reminds me of a Cat .”

(Ivar After Rwby) " Of  Course Come Here  ,Ivar  , If you Need  a Shoulder  to  Cry   come  to  me  , I have been Moved by Your Life  Story, You  still Remind  of  a Cat  though "

(If You Have Gilgamesh , Ozy or Medb) " Aww ~ You seem Jealous, Is it because of My Breathtaking Beauty  attracts Everyone to me like bees to a Flower."

Something you like: I love Sweets and Sugar ,but I'm on diet after looking at the Scale .

Something you dislike:  I personally Hate being  Called a Drag queen or Okama  its Basically  telling me I couldn't  past for a Woman to save my life  , I don't like being Called Fat my Father had to be carried by crane  you know.

About the Holy Grail: Grail , If I had  I'd wish  to  be able  to Find  True Love   and Get married   During an

Event: An  Event , Ah something  Different   than Our Usal Missions we should take break and relax. Birthday: Happy Birthday , Master  ,I shall  get the Cafeteria  to prepare a Banquet.

——-—

Other stuff

to clarify Bess is More gender non conforming and Really doesn’t caring for looking or acting Traditionally Masculine or Feminine . He’ll wear a Pencil skirt cause it looks nice and if people Mistake him for a women then he really dosent care to him that just means He looks pretty. He’ll drop to his natural sounding voice . Mainly because Elizabeth was Literally praised for his beauty even in his older Years where he was worse for wear in Servant form hes at most in his 30’s .

The reason why Bess hid as Women all his Life is that he was afraid of appearing weak and having a short chaotic rule like his sister as he says” It better to appear as a strong woman than be consider a weak man.“

also He’s 6’3 very tall .

In Fate Lotus order

The some of servants of Chaldea seemed to started a Fan club around Bess . This was started by Nobu and Nobukatsu( Whose actually a saber in this universe) cause Nobukatsu ended up forming a crush on him .

Bess pseudo Harem( cause he dosent know about this )now has

Finn mc Cool

a Chinese moth

Drake in there technically cause they’re Friends

his Advisor who is now a Pretty boy merged with a Snake like Eldritch god due messing with the Occult ( John dee )

he is unapologetically Bi and Unapologetically aware that he’s Thicc

Bess being a Male is based of a Debunked theory of Elizabeth Tudor being replaced by Similar looking male child after dying of illness . He is My Very first servant Oc along with his Sister Mary and Red riding Hood.

[duker42]

can i request this: Y/N is a well loved chubby lil cook for the soldiers, known to be really friendly but socially awkward. she one day bakes multiple batches of cookies with her own ingredients for heckin everyone but saves an extra special one with a little heart made of chocolate chips on it. she gives it to the last person to grab food, levi heckin ackerman. fluff, slight angst from a misunderstanding, and hilarity ensue. sorry if it's too specific ;w;

***So it was a little specific, but hopefully I got the gist of what you wanted. This one was a challenge, but I think it turned out well!

💜Baked with Love💜

Y/N hummed as her egg timer went off. She grabbed a thick towel and reached into the ovens, pulling out the last trays of cookies. Setting them to cool, she began to tidy up the large kitchen, her white uniform covered by the neat apron she wore.

She wasn’t a soldier but her gently rounded curves wore the uniform of one. She supported the soldiers, as their cook and it had just made sense to her higher ups to wear the standard clothes. It was a sometimes grueling job, making their meager budget stretch to try and fill those active bellies with sufficient food. Y/N was creative though. She had managed to convince Commander Erwin that the money saved on frighteningly expensive herbs was worth the time and effort she put into the small gardens in the castle courtyard.

Still, she tried to spoil the Scouts before any upcoming missions beyond the walls. Most of them were frightened kids, unsure of what was to come, unlikely to make it home again. So she did her best to try and remind them of better times if they had those memories or create them if they didn’t. And everyone loved chocolate chip cookies.

The dinner was prepared, and the cookies cooled by the time she had finished washing the last of the pans. Gathering the trays, she began to fill the bowls and plates, certain that the people would start to rush in now that the hour had chimed.

As the people passed through, she gave them a friendly smile, but tried not to talk. She normally stuttered from embarrassment or got tongue tied when there were too many people around.

The line had dwindled out, so she turned her attention to the last of the pans, scrubbing them vigorously as she let her mind wander back to that one last cookie. She had baked it in hopes to give it to one man that seemed to make her heart flutter, but she hadn’t seen him in the Mess Hall tonight.

Lost in thought, she stood for Lord only knows how long before a loud “Oi!” Broke through. Looking up, she spotted the abject of her thoughts standing in the doorway, a bored expression on his handsome face.

“Oh, Captain Levi! Sorry, sir. I’ll get your food right away! She washed her hands diligently and quickly set up his tray of food. With a slight blush, she carefully put the special cookie on the tray before handing it to him, avoiding his eyes.

He walked off without saying anything and she sighed in relief. She stopped herself from looking out across the dining room after him as she turned her attention back to the pans in the sink.

~~~~~

Levi looked down at the cookie with something akin to horror. About the size of his palm, the sweet treat had chocolate chips baked onto it. He HATED sweets. Picking the plate back up, he marches back towards the kitchens.

“Here” He thrust the plate back towards, Y/N throwing her rag down to grab the offending item from him. “I don’t want this shit.”

Spinning on his heel, he walked back out of the kitchens, unknowingly leaving a broken hearted Y/N behind.

~~~~~

Everyone had noticed that Y/N was not her usual smiling self. But no one could quite figure out what was the reasoning for it. The cheerfulness of the kitchens had been replaced by a melancholy air.

Levi’s eyes narrowed as he went through the line for his tray. Y/N had looked away from him every time he had come through lately. Was she upset because he hadn’t eaten her cookie that day? No that couldn’t the case....too many others loved the baked goods she spoiled them with.

He hated sweets for a very good reason. They hurt his stomach, BADLY. That one cookie would have been enough to send him to the bathroom for hours, praying for relief. While he enjoyed his shit jokes, he hated enduring the cramping ass burning pain that came with eating sugar, so he avoided it all together. He figured that he was that way because of the limited diet he had growing up in the Underground. Now, it was just something he lived with.

Maybe he should talk to Y/N. Hopefully he would be able to sooth any ruffled feathers without revealing his embarrassing personal fight against sweet treats.

~~~~~

A light knock on the door pulled Y/N away from planning the next day’s menu. Shuffling to the door, she opened it to reveal Levi, his normal expression in place.

“Can I come in?” His words were smooth and easy, like he hadn’t stomped on her heart a few days ago. She seethed in anger that he would approach her after working hours.

“No.” She moved to shut the door when he placed his foot in the frame, blocking her from closing it in his face.

“Shit, I didn’t think you would be this mad about not eating a damn cookie.” His slightly surprised tone pissed Y/N off even further.

She gave a short bitter laugh. “Yep, I’m upset because you didn’t eat the cookie. That’s what it is.” Her sarcasm wasn’t lost on him, but he was confused on why she was so damn angry.

“Then what the hell is the problem?” Rude and to the point as always, his grey eyes flicked to hers.

“Could have something to do with the fact that I gave you a special cookie, one where a HEART was formed from the chocolate chips, letting you know how I felt. And you returned it, saying, I quote ‘I don’t want this shit.’ Maybe....could possibly be the reason I’m upset. Now if you will please leave.......” She trailed off, nodding towards the door as she turned her back on him.

Understanding made him freeze. He hadn’t paid attention to the damn cookie. Once he realized the confectionary treat was on his plate, all he could think about was getting the devil food away from him. He hadn’t noticed the heart shaped laid out on top. Shit.....She had tried to tell him how she felt the only way she knew how, through her food. And like a complete ass, he had unknowingly rejected her.

He had wanted Y/N for years. Had been intrigued by the curvaceous little cook when she had first joined them. Watched her awkward social interaction in large groups, knowing that she was similar in her clumsiness in making small talk. But he had also noticed her passion for making the lives of the Scouts around her better by making the crap food they used to eat feel a bit more like something that would be served at a family dinner table.

Walking over to her, he placed a hesitant hand on her shoulder, feeling her tense under his touch. He would have to tread carefully and watch his abrasive tongue if he was going to set things right and perhaps earn a chance with her.

“Y/N, I’m sorry. I didn’t really look at the cookie. I didn’t see the heart on it. If I had, I would have never returned it to you.” He fought to keep the tremor from his voice. Every time he had practiced talking to her about anything other than food, he had stammered. He didn’t want to make a fool out of himself now.

“Would you have eaten it?” Her question was quiet. He winced, he couldn’t lie to her.

“No.”

Her shoulder slumped under his hand. He sighed, resigned to having to reveal his reasons.

“I didn’t want to spend the rest of the night shitting myself. So no, I wouldn’t have eaten it. Sugar upsets my stomach. I haven’t eaten any of the treats you make. I can’t.” He closed his eyes as his face begins to turn bright red.

She shakes underneath his touch. Her hand had moved up and covered her mouth, small noises coming from her. Shit....he made her cry. Feeling like a complete jerk, he carefully turned her around.

His eyes widened as he look at her. She was red-faced, her eyes dancing in amusement. The little shit was laughing at him. She released her mouth and grabbed onto his arm as her bright laughter filled the room. Rolling his eyes, he looks away.

“I didn’t realize....I’ll make you some savory treats next time. So you aren’t the butt of your own shit jokes.” She snickered, pulling his face back to meet hers.

Giving in to his own wants, he lowered his head to hover his lips over hers. “Your jokes are shit, Y/N.”

Mobile MasterList

[rachelanne2018writes]

Vignettes of Love: The Turner Family; An Unexpected African Souvenir

Summary: A Modern Take on Shelagh finding out that she is pregnant with the child we now know as Edward Patrick "Teddy" Turner.

Two weeks. Shelagh and Patrick had been home for two weeks from their mission in Central Africa.

Their mission, alongside the Sisters of Saint Raymond Nonatus, and the nurses had successfully improved conditions at Dr. Mayra Fitzgerald’s Hope Clinic- even when the doctor herself fell ill. The nights that she and Patrick had spent in Port Elizabeth had been blissful. The childless and colleague-less nights had prompted not only several necessary discussions but also marital relations for the first few times since Anglea Julienne came home.

Two weeks. Shelagh’s monthly cycle should have come two weeks ago, but it didn’t alarm her because of previous infrequencies. Although in the last year and a half it was more regular, Shelagh passed it off as a return to irregularity from flying across the equator and being away from their standard diet in Poplar. If Shelagh was honest with herself, she hadn’t noticed her lack of a cycle until her stomach troubles began.

Three weeks after they arrived home, Shelagh’s stomach began causing trouble. When Shelagh woke, almost instantly, the need to rid her stomach of its contents arose and won more mornings than not. At first, it seemed as though it was a simple stomach bug- but after an off-handed comment from Sister Ursula, Shelagh wasn’t so sure.

The next day, after her weekly food shop, Shelagh stole away to the chemist and picked up something she hadn’t thought about for nearly three years- a pregnancy test.

Nearly three years ago, an ultrasound from a fertility specialist had revealed scarring of the endometrium, the inner lining of the uterus. The doctor was sure that it was unlikely that Shelagh would conceive and carry a child to full term. It nearly broke Shelagh to hear the news.

Now her Shelagh was sitting on the floor of the flat’s bathroom waiting for the test result. Now it was time to determine whether Sister Ursula’s comment meant something more, or whether she was reading too far into a possible meaning.

“No. No.” Shelagh whispered as tears began to fall. There it was, printed in bold lettering, the word PREGNANT.

Although Shelagh had been a nurse and midwife for nearly a decade and knew the accuracy statistics of at-home pregnancy tests, she wasn’t sure that they would be the same for her troublesome body.

At that moment, Shelagh wanted to get back to bed, be next to her husband, and forget what worried her. That feeling brought her to a dangerous, split-second decision. She’d wait one more week and, if the symptoms persist, take another test or visit Julienne after work one day. For now, sleep called her name, and Shelagh was more than happy to indulge. Suddenly, Shelagh awoke to her cellphone ringing and several missed calls and texts from Patrick.

“Shelagh? Where are you, are you alright?” Patrick Turner nearly yelled into his cellphone “Patrick? What time is it?” Shelagh managed to squeak out before suddenly running to the and once again spiling horrible tasting bile into the toilet. “Shelagh? Shelagh, are you alright?” “I’m fine, Patrick; I’ll see you at the Surgery in a few minutes.” “Shelagh, no. I’m going to have Julienne come and visit you.”

Shelagh could tell from Patrick’s tone of voice that he wouldn’t put up with an argument, and so she agreed before falling back asleep.

(Patrick) Could I trouble you to stop by the flat and check on Shelagh? (Julienne) Is something wrong, is she ill? (Patrick) I feel as though she’s either ill or telling me something that she cannot put into words for some reason. (Julienne) I see I’ll pop over after midday prayers and take a look. (Patrick) Thank you, I appreciate it.

The next time Shelagh awoke, she slowly became aware of someone pressing on her abdomen. It wasn’t uncomfortable, but the sensation was quite strange, and as she became more aware of who was pressing on her abdomen.

“Sister Julienne?” “My dear Shelagh, why didn’t you tell anyone?”

That moment cemented the reality in her mind. Shelagh Turner was pregnant with a miracle child. A child that science deemed she’d never have, but faith told her otherwise.

“I just took a test this morning,” Shelagh whispered, “I didn’t believe it when it came up positive.” “Oh, my dear Shelagh. You’re nearly two months pregnant.”

Later that night, when Shelagh felt better and had eaten some soup successfully, she told Patrick the news. The news shocked him at first, but Patrick’s smile reassured Shelagh that everything would eventually be okay.

Even when Shelagh was admitted to the hospital suddenly a month or so later, their love and affection remained a strong force, overcoming and persevering over everything. Thankfully, technology allowed Shelagh to see Timothy and Angela while she was in the hospital. Without those FaceTime sessions in the Late Afternoons and Early Evenings, Shelagh wasn’t sure that she couldn’t have kept her sanity.

[happymetalgirl]

The 15 Worst Metal Albums of 2020

This list might have been shorter if not for my running into a few awful albums at the end of the year that I had been avoiding wisely up until that point. My morbid curiosity got the best of me, and what’s done is done. I’m paying the price for it by going back over the worst albums I heard all year. Let’s get this over with.

15. Ghøstkid - Ghøstkid

This was the debut solo album from the former singer of Eskimo Callboy, who had a pretty decent backing of hype heading into this release under the Ghøstkid moniker, but with the namesake frontman putting in no more than the standard performance on a bunch of poorly assembled tracks in an unappealing and dated poppy metalcore style, ultimately the eponymous album wound up disappointing me pretty substantially.

14. Powerman 5000 - The Noble Rot

Powerman 5000 are just such a low-rate band that even one of their more okay albums makes it here. While not as astoundingly, mind-numbingly basic as their worst material, The Noble Rot is still some of the most unevolved, underwritten, and forgettable electro rock and industrial metal I’ve heard from a big name artist. This is some eighth grade level songwriting here, and that’s a fuckin’ feat for a band that’s been around longer than any eighth grader has.

13. Corey Taylor - CMFT

There was a lot of hype around Corey Taylor finally coming out with a solo project, and it was pretty damn disappointing to hear a bunch of uninteresting classic rock too tacky for Stone Sour. CMFT focuses on the fun side that has made its creator such an enigmatic figurehead in the metal press, but its one-note approach does little more than highlight Corey Taylor’s songwriting deficiencies. I really could have seen this album turning out better too, with just some more time and care put into it, if a fun time of an album is what Taylor was going for. Unfortunately Taylor tried to make a party album and a grand ceremonial tribute to his greatness at the same time, and ego-petting and partying don’t really go hand in hand.

12. Evildead - United States of Anarchy

It has some good bones underneath it, but Evildead’s long overdue (if anyone was asking for it) third album wears out its welcome so quickly with some of the most adolescent thrash I’ve heard in a while. The band gets some good rhythms going and the vocals aren’t terrible either, fitting the older thrash style pretty well. But the band’s predictable formula tires out very quickly, and the political commentary of the lyrics is too cheesy and cringeworthy to ignore. It seems every year we get a handful of these kinds of albums that try to get into the simmering thrash revival with some ultra retro approach, and a good portion of those albums are from long-defunct bands who figure their primitive old-school approach might be a selling point despite their sounds often being even more juvenile against the backdrop of today’s metal landscape. So it’s not a huge surprise or anything to hear an album as ham-fisted and corny as United States of Anarchy; this year it just happened to be Evildead.

11. Five Finger Death Punch - F8

They may not always place highest in this list, but they always manage to make it here, and this was actually an improvement on the last album, not that that’s saying all that much. In fact, I’d say this is the only time in the band’s history that they actually shifted their trajectory upwards. But while the band’s ugly continual creative decay has been a hard thing to watch and made them the five finger punching bag of the metal world, there seems to be a large enough swath of mouthbreathing chuds who love their incoherent derivative shit and flock to their shows enough to put them in lucrative headlining slots and on top of the metal world. Goddamn that sure sounds a lot like someone else we all know doesn’t it. I’ve criticized them plenty in the past, and while indeed an improvement, F8 only mildly remedies the numerous problems with Five Finger Death Punch. Still septic to the system are the predictably formulaic and tiresome songwriting, the stale production, the corny butt rock choruses, the shitty bootlicking worldview that bleeds into Ivan Moody’s douchey and faux-deep lyrics, the contrived ballads and country-dabbling. Even with an improvement in the flow of the track listing and a few more bangers that somewhat hearken back to their first album, F8 is still an over-thought and overly calculated batch of Sirius XM fodder that’s trying to please everyone in some superficial way. I’ll grant that it seems as though the band realized they had been giving the more metal-immersed side of their fanbase that has been with them the longest smaller and smaller crumbs with each new album. I’m not gonna hold my breath for this being anything more than placating for the time being; I’m sure the next album will find the band back on whatever bullshit they feel (or their execs feel) they need to be on to pull enough streams from inattentive radio metal bros. I always end with the disclaimer that I still steadfastly stand by the band’s first two albums, and even American Capitalist to a degree, and that I totally acknowledge the immense potential for greatness this band could seemingly at any time decide to fulfill. Ivan Moody is a talented vocalist with a lot of star power and they really could have been the second coming of Pantera or singlehandedly ignited a new wave of American groove metal and metalcore or carried it on their own. But instead the band have followed the money on the path of least resistance to fast-track their way to the top of festival tickets, which I’m sure affords them quite enough luxury and comfort in life, more than most bands these days get, but it doesn’t exempt them from criticism, and unfortunately I think their legacy will show that they were a lowest common denominator kind of band at the end of the day when they could have been, again, like a second Pantera or something.

10. Anvil - Legal at Last

Another year, another album of Anvil unable to evolve past their prototypic thrash of their forty-year-old origins. Though as tacky as ever, Anvil actually also managed to make a mild improvement on their last album on the musical front at least. The songs are a little more energetic and easier to get through, if not for the lyricism though. Anvil lyrics are never anything beyond a fourth-grader’s poetry assignment for their English class, but some of the Facebook boomer lyrics here are fucking cringy dude. A quick look at the track listing will let you know exactly where you’re gonna find the juiciest cringe, but honestly, even as far as cringe goes it’s nothing comedically special and cringe culture in general is played out anyway. So do yourself a favor and just ignore Anvil the way they deserve to be ignored.

9. Halestorm - Reimagined

It feels a little harsh to place an EP here, especially for a band whose album back in 2018 was one of the best things I have heard to come out of hard rock in a long time. But these stripped back covers and revisions of songs from the band’s catalog just suck all the oomph out of them, perhaps making the case by contrast for the importance of the role the rest of the band behind the indeed charismatic powerhouse frontwoman Lzzy Hale play in making their sound what it is. It’s unlikely this points to any kind of new direction for them, so I’m not particularly worried about them running into this problem again. Plus, I don’t think Halestorm and Lzzy Hale are like fundamentally incompatible with more ballad-y rock music, this forced balladization of older songs just did not work, and it makes perfect sense as to why.

8. Gama Bomb - Sea Savage

The fact that this album is only number 8 on this list is just depressing for its reminder of just how much shittier it got this year. The fact that there are seven albums from this yet worse than Sea Savage, goddamn. With one exception, this was maybe the stupidest album I heard all year, at least in the thrash department it was. God this thing is a sugar high mess. I feel like a toddler on an entire bag of Halloween candy or an elementary schooler on a 2-liter of Mountain Dew sat at a computer to program a thrash album would’ve probably come up with something like this. The erratic operatic highs and dumbass lyrics, it all just embodies everything that ever made thrash look bad. It’s like that drunk guy at a party who’s hyper as shit and doing a bunch of crazy stunts for attention because he thinks it’ll make the people there like him more, but really he’s just embarrassing himself. Yeah, definitely the worst thrash metal album I heard all year, and one I wish I could unhear.

7. Amaranthe - Manifest

One of the albums I was avoiding but reviewed late out of my own weird sense of obligation that I wasn’t surprised to find only validated my reasons for avoiding it in the first place. The weird combo of dancy pop music and power metal isn’t as crazy of an idea as it might seem at first thought. In fact, that’s basically in part what Babymetal are doing, and actually getting better and better at. But Amaranthe get the worst of both worlds with Manifest, unsavory pop melodies and utterly generic symphonic metal to make for something I’m not at all surprised I was so repulsed by.

6. Trapt - Shadow Work

Yep, I listened to it. God, no wonder this band is flailing in irrelevance with aggressive MAGA nonsense being their only audible desperate plea for attention. The album, thank fuck, isn’t steeped in the same bitch boy tantrum that the band’s singer has engaged in all year to the point of getting his band’s Facebook page banned for hate speech, and the music isn’t like offensively poorly made or anything like that either. There’s clearly a conscious meeting of the baseline requirements for the type of music they make, but holy fuck it’s so damn flavorless and predictable. It’d be one thing if this was the trendy thing to be doing, but this diet hard rock for people who think Three Days Grace is too wild has been out of fashion for over a decade. And Trapt are just recycling the same dumb formula that overstayed it’s welcome in the early 2000’s. Yeah, I’m not surprised at all, but god, it’s the kind of thing that has to be apparent to the band themselves too unless they’re lacking of any and all self-awareness. Trapt have thrown themselves to the forefront of the online metal world’s discourse by being an annoying, toxic, and childish presence all year; the silver lining being the unity among metalheads in roasting their laughable posturing about their Pandora numbers and the juicy memes about their one hit “Headstrong” that rile the snowflake singer up without fail. And this shit album is just another reason to laugh at them and more fuel to roast their crybaby Trumper frontman with. Go back into your hole, Trapt. 3/10

5. Unleash the Archers - Abyss

I talked about it in my review, but there really is only one simple thing that sinks this album so low. And that is just how incredibly low-effort and lifeless it is with a genre that’s supposed to be so life-affirming. Power metal isn’t the most highly revered genre in metal, but that’s just for its cheesiness. I love it; when it’s at its best, it’s some of the most inspiring metal music out there and I genuinely wish there was a bigger demand across the board for it. But Unleash the Archers just sound so flat and unenthusiastic in this album, and, sorry, in power metal, unabashed enthusiasm is just nonnegotiable. The guitar parts are phoned in and lacking in imagination, and the vocals especially are so narrow-range, it’s all so antithetical to the ethos of power metal and it doesn’t make a strong case for itself. I’ll leave it there; this album is lazy and lifeless so I feel no need to waste any of my time and work on it.

4. Burzum - Thûlean Mysteries

Ol’ Varg must’ve needed a new wizard hat or camouflage pants or whatever goofy shit he’s been doing since retiring the Burzum name to focus on his racism and LARPing because I thought Burzum was supposed to be finished. I thought you were done with Burzum, Varg. Apparently not too done to not dump an hour and a half of embarrassingly half-baked ambient dungeon synth song fragments that sound, so many of them, quite obviously unfinished. Varg Vikernes has been a washed-up shell of the musical god the various weirdos who idolize him make him out to be for a long time now, and it has shown in the gradually degrading work he had put out after his release from prison. Yet after clearly not caring about creating music in any meaningful way for a long time, Varg drops this heap of shit in his fans’ laps. I suppose they deserve it, but I’m sure some of them are delusional enough to lap it up with a smile on their face while still believing their white nationalist idol to be a musical genius. Again, it’s entirely dull ambient music, not metal at all, but it deserves to be shit upon for its astounding laziness and purposelessness.

3. Asking Alexandria - Like a House on Fire

Doubling down on exactly the unflattering crossover of pop music with their significantly sanitized butt rock in their apparent quest for arena glory that started with their self-titled album back in 2017, Asking Alexandria’s bid for the big spotlight that Imagine Dragons occupies didn’t get any stronger this year with Like a House on Fire. After three or four years of aiming for this style, the band still aren’t even all that competent with the basics of fucking pop rock, which is pretty downright laughable. Honestly, for an album so high up here on my shit list, my feelings on it are more or less just that of unsurprised disappointment; as soon as I got a feel for what the band were doing with the album, I knew it was going to be a mess of predictable results. And lo and behold. This was just such a wholly inexcusably floppy paper towel of an album, and one more Asking Alexandria release I know I won’t be returning to ever again.

2. Hollywood Undead - New Empire, Vol. 2

Coming on at the last minute to get on the scoreboard, reliably, is Hollywood Undead. When I reviewed both volumes of this project earlier, I referred to them as “corporate Linkin Park���, and I stand by that 100%. This album especially showcases nothing but what an incoherent, vapid, clout-chasing act they are, with such a corny, focus-grouped sound that sounds like it was made in a lab by a bunch of out-of-touch boomers. God, they could’ve been safe too if they had left it with the more tolerable first volume back in January, but this follow-up sequel from just this month was exactly why I had avoided listening to the first installment in the first place. And I should’ve never played this second one either. The album opener, “Medicate”, is probably the worst song I sat through in my own volition this year, and the rest of the album doesn’t get much better. It’s nothing new for Hollywood Undead after I gave their 2017 album my award for least favorite album of that year: more unfitting interplay between machismo posturing Eminem-cosplay and the sappiest, wimpiest radio rock and pop choruses; more cringy tough-guy struggle bars; more forgettable-at-best instrumentals. Congrats again, Hollywood Undead, you made one of the worst albums of the year once again.

But even worse than Hollywood Undead is an album that I feel like is already so legendarily bad, that there is no other album that could’ve been sat here. It had to be this one.

1. Six Feet Under - Nightmares of the Decomposed

Shitty metal bands everywhere can breathe a sigh of relief any year Six Feet Under decide to put out new music because any album they release is just about bound to end up as everyone’s #1 worst album of the year, and boy is that guarantee becoming more and more airtight with each successive release. It’s truly astounding too how Six Feet Under manages to outdo themselves every time. I don’t even want to think about what could possibly come after Nightmares of the Decomposed; we’ll cross that bridge when we get there. But for now, holy fermented shit, this thing is not just bad, it’s like the holy grail of terrible TERRIBLE albums and I don’t want to know what kind of apocalyptically despicable album Chris Barnes and company could possibly conjure to outdo this one. And make no mistake, it’s still Chris Barnes dragging this band down. I gave this album a 1/10 instead of a 0/10 because there was at least a sliver of salvageable instrumentation on it, as thin of a sliver as it was, a few halfway decent musical ideas of you squinted hard enough. The instrumentalists are checked out and clearly just participating for the paycheck, but I can’t even imagine what kind of professional instrumental performance could possibly overshadow the embarrassment that Chris Barnes put to tape in the studio here. Maybe that says it, because it honestly sounds utterly unprofessional. It’s baffling how this got through management and sound engineering to be released to the public because I don’t think I’ve ever even heard any amateur high school band’s vocalist sound this bad. Vocal ingenuity is generally something to be applauded in the metal world, and pioneers like Randy Blythe, Dani Filth, and Travis Ryan deserve all the praise they get for their innovation with dirty metal vocals, yet what Chris Barnes has “invented” here on Nightmares of the Decomposed to compensate for his continually-deteriorating vocals is just sad. The man simply cannot perform highs anymore, clearly, and the alternative is this fucking comical, cartoonish squealing that sounds more like a bratty toddler gargling their own snot than it does anything fitting for a death metal record, even a death metal record at stupid and cheesy as Nightmares of the Decomposed. Chris Barnes should be thankful that metal is not a sport and that there’s not nearly as much of an abundance of performance statistics to point to and analyze to see what kind of records are broken in a legendarily awful performance. I feel like if there were any kind of performance stats to pull up, this album would have to break some kinds of records. Like this is worse than that 7-1 Germany-Brazil World Cup game, this would be like if the Brazilian team all got unholy levels of blazed and repeatedly scored on themselves because they kept going the wrong way and kicking the ball into their own net, and then pissing their fucking shorts. Even in 7-1 defeat, Brazil had more dignity than Chris Barnes here. Six Feet Under and their label have to know they are a laughing stock and that people will listen to them at this point for the sheer entertainment value of how mind-blowingly awful they sound. It’s not an illegitimate marketing tactic, and it’s the only explanation I can come up with for how this passed inspection. If that’s their mission, to be a spectacle and instill cringe in death metal fans in a regular ritual of comically stupid performances across every successive album, they’re sure doing it, and I guess this baffling headache-trophy is their well-earned prize. Congratulations Six Feet Under, you did it again! Worst metal album of the year.

[adelinathefairy]

Chapter One

“Hey,” Muriel, a round rosy cheeked boy turned in his seat now facing me. “Why do you wear your hair up when you have so much acne?” I sit still in my chair startled by his words. I want to be angry. I want to tell him that I don’t care what he thinks but my thoughts quickly crumble and what comes out of my mouth is a weak attempt at whatever it was I was trying to say. Muriel returns to his previous conversation apparently uncaring what effect his words have on me. My hands work to untie the ribbon holding up my light golden brown hair as I begin to feel the familiar feeling of pressure building behind my eyes. My long hair falls below my breasts shadowing my now tear stained face. 

I rub my eyes harshly, a frown planted on my face from the unpleasant memory. Although three years have passed that particular moment in my life has continued to haunt me. My hands fidget nervously in my lap as the words of my friend drone on. Ember was undoubtedly beautiful with her large brown eyes, full lips, chocolate skin, and naturally coiled hair that hovered gracefully above her shoulders. The Autumn orange dress she wore hugged her body in a delicate way that accentuated her curves and fell just below her knees. I was always curious as to why she had chosen me as her friend. While she was lively and outgoing, I was always quite depressed looking, or at least that’s what I've been told anyway. I turn to face her, once again straining my face to plaster on the most believable smile I could conjure up. “Adelina, what is it?”

 Her eyes hold an almost comforting concern and her smile only warms me more. “You’ve been shaking your head and using that dumb fake smile for the past hour at whatever I say and you think I wouldn’t notice?” My eyes widen and I rush to apologize but before I can think up what to say I notice her holding back a laugh, small giggles and snickers falling from behind her hand clasped tightly around her mouth. Dumbfounded I stare with wide eyes at her unexpected reaction. “You know i’m not upset right? I’m just worried about you.” She smiles gently continuing her giggling. “You’ve been acting strangely all day.” A frown creeps back onto my lips again as I recall this morning's affairs.

 I suffer from regular anxiety attacks and this morning was no exception. The thought of coming to school each day, being surrounded by people who criticise everything and everyone, and the overwhelming workload do nothing to ease my mind as I come closer to the horrid building each morning. Before I can come up with an answer a grey haired woman struts to the front of the class. Her mix-matched brightly colored floral print attire strain my eyes as I try to focus my attention on what she’s saying. “Today we’ll be focusing on the history of fairies and elves.” I roll my eyes at the thought of repeating the long drawn out story of how we came to peace with the elves. Every year since kindergarten we’ve been told of the gruesome battles and numerous peace treaties countlessly broken. It’s not like we ever had much to fight about but it’s in our nature to find flaws in everything. 

Unlike many other fairies I've known I never really took a side. Being a fairie i’m expected to be biased and choose to side with others of my kind, but i’ve never cared much for fighting and having known many elves I can confidently say that there’s not many differences between us. The loud blare of the bell pulls me from my thoughts and I quickly gather my things eager to leave the overwhelmingly loud classroom.

 Ember maneuvers through the cluster of loud teens making her way through the crowded halls to her locker, I follow behind losing myself many times in the ocean of chaos. Much to my despise when I arrive at my friend’s locker another girl has already taken the space beside her. I stand awkwardly to the side wishing for her to leave. Tyra stood facing Ember, her short hair covering one side of her pale face. She was neither pretty nor ugly with a rosy complexion, deep blue almond shaped eyes, and a full hourglass figure. Half her head was shaved the other side barely reaching below her nose. She had mousy brown hair with harsh blonde streaks and always wore an unpleasant look on her face. I always try my best to get along with her but she never seemed to like me much. We’ve had disagreements before but they always seemed to be about stupid things she would choose to get upset over. Before I could gather the courage to speak to her a tall awkward looking boy pulled her to the side. Tyra’s boyfriend much like her was neither attractive nor ugly. His face was littered with small red dots and his unfortunate taste in clothing didn’t help his appearance either. I can’t help but think that he could be quite handsome if he put in some effort.

I move to stand beside my friend relieved to be alone with her once more. “Hey do you mind if I borrow your gym clothes? I can’t find mine anywhere.” Ember was still digging through her locker in a hurry. We didn’t have much time till class and the gym was on the other side of the building far from where we were standing. I look down at the stiff greyish t-shirt and long black shorts in my hands. I bite my lip knowing these are my only pair and I can’t afford to have points taken off. “Yeah, of course you can use mine.” I hold out the uniform knowing I'll regret it later. We hurry off to the gym chatting on the way there.

As we reach the big blue doors my stomach drops. I know we’re late and I dread having all eyes on me as the teacher scolds us for not paying more attention to time. I push back those thoughts and make my way into the large room following closely behind Ember. We rush to our spots on the shining floor dropping our things down before plopping next to Oliver. I’d know Oliver since second grade and while he could be quite strange at times he was a good friend. He was tall and fit with honey blond hair and blue eyes. He was quite large compared to most others our age even for an elf. He wrapped his arm around me as I sat and I couldn’t help but shy away from his touch. He was a close friend but I couldn’t bring myself to think of him as anything more.

 I had known for quite some time that he liked me but the idea of bringing it up made me sick to my stomach. I jumped up as soon as the teacher gave us the signal to go get changed. I hurried to the locker room alongside Ember. My hands squeezed together into tight fists as my anxiety rose. I stood to examine myself in a long mirror propped up against a row of lockers but quickly turned my head at the sight of my body. I hadn't eaten in quite awhile but no matter how much weight I lost from my unsustainable diet I could never quite meet my own standard which only seemed to rise with each pound I shed. I was by no means ugly but I couldn’t shake the feeling of disgust that came over me every time I looked in a mirror. My blue eyes couldn’t compare to her green ones I thought. My waist will never be as small as hers. Nothing was ever enough.

[congadrug29]

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How long does it take to whiten teeth at dentist?

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I haven't had any of these therapies directly, so can not supply a testimonial nonetheless, go inspect them out online for a complete checklist of thir serivces. A couple of years ago I was stressed with whitening my teeth, to the factor of getting them brilliant-white as well as even taking place a few vacations to obtain a tan, as having a tan makes your teeth look whiter. Next off came the phase of the baristas, where I was drinking coffee at the very least 4 or 5 cups a day, so my teeth slowly went from brilliant-white to a tarnished shade of yellow over this 3 year period. Laser whitened teeth balance as much as 14 tones whiter than prior to laser therapy. For friendly service, as well as for secure teeth whitening that functions, get in touch with Notting Hillside Dental Clinic on today.

A cheek retractor is put right into the mouth to maintain it open during the procedure. You'll likewise use protective glasses to shield your eyes from the laser. Our caring and also very certified scientific group will certainly chat you through the teeth whitening options available.

Dr Marques additionally described it will certainly depend upon whether you smoke and advised me to drink milky tea as well as coffee as well as prevent red wine, carbonated beverages and also refined sugar. He also discussed that a top notch electric tooth brush, like a Philips Sonicare or Dental B version, will make a distinction. Cosmetic teeth whitening has actually been included on smile transformation TELEVISION shows such as Extreme Transformation. Teeth whitening gel is then placed into the personalized tray as well as worn either overnight or for a few hours during the evening. teeth whitening solihull have actually reported their teeth appearing whiter in as low as 30 minutes when making use of Pola Day, but for the brightest results, it is suggested to utilize Pola Night overnight when sleeping. If you're taking into consideration a whiter smile, call Freeman & Rosser Dental & Implant Facility on today to schedule a consultation.

Laser whitening needs you to also buy an in your home package, which allows you bleach your teeth when it's most hassle-free for you. Simply use your trays for either one to 2 hrs a day or overnight, relying on the formula your dental professional advises. You can safeguard your brand-new teeth brightness by consuming with a straw to decrease the effect of discoloration from beverages. Make certain to see your dental professional for regular appointments and cleaning, as well as you can likewise use a whitening tooth paste to aid whiten and protect teeth. The dental expert will certainly after that use a lightening gel to the front of your teeth. According to Bupa, the gel generally has either hydrogen peroxide or carbamide peroxide, which launches oxygen onto the surface of your teeth and also bleaches them. The dental expert will line your lips with a safety SPF cream which contains moisturisers.

Although they do not impact the all-natural colour of the tooth, they work at eliminating staining and also consequently enhancing the overall look of the tooth. Whitening tooth paste may also assist to keep up the appearance, as soon as teeth have actually been expertly lightened.

This innovative treatment can whiten teeth by up to eleven tones with the use of a bleaching gel and also special light. Your dental expert will certainly take perceptions of your teeth in order to custom-make a mouth piece. You will certainly wear the mouth piece - full of whitening gel - in your home for numerous hours daily. Dr Marques discussed to me that this also varies from person to person as well as relies on how white you want your teeth to be. I still wanted my own to look natural so I don't mind excessive that the outcomes will fade gradually but ought to last for a few years.

Both techniques use our comfy custom research laboratory made whitening trays to help maintain the whitening gel in close call with the teeth as well as not leak out and also irritate the gum tissues. The gels that we use additionally have the creative enhancement of an anti-sensitivity component which assists avoid the incident of sensitivity. The last decade has actually seen a big increase in non-professional teeth whitening being used in high road beauty parlor and also health clubs, as well as whitening gadgets you can buy online. Lasers speed up the peroxide gel used to bleach teeth, activating it with a mild warm that reduces the procedure time for the person. Laser whitening is backed by studies that have shown it is secure and reliable for your teeth as well as gums. As well as because our dental professionals suggests it, you can be sure that your outcomes will certainly correspond and also safe on any kind of fillings or reconstructions you may have.

[wanderlustlanguages]

Brazil study abroad roundup

So since I failed at posting during my study abroad I am going to attempt to sum everything up here. I hope this might be helpful for people who want to study abroad in Brazil in the future.

Disclaimer: This is written based on my personal experience which is of course affected by who I am (20-year-old, female, Austrian, introverted, straight, white,...) and the people I happened to meet and a million other small factors.

If you have any specific questions don’t hesitate to inbox me or send me a message.

Rio de Janeiro

I spent my exchange semester in Brazil or more precisely in Rio de Janeiro. Rio de Janeiro is without a doubt a city unlike any other (I have ever seen at least). My favourite thing about Rio is its diversity in both its population and the landscape. Rio really has it all amazing beaches, lush-greenness and a buzzing city. The city itself was probably my favorite thing about my exchange. I remember the first day I arrived and drove through the city to get to my apartment. I was fascinated by how the rich and the poor lived so close to each other and how there were 15 story buildings right in front of green hills and corporate office next to a beach.

Culture and People

The culture is completely different from anything I have ever experienced before. People in Brazil are so friendly it is shocking. Everyone seems to be open to have a chat and help you out. The one downside I found to this (as an introvert) while everyone is open to having a chat it can be hard to find real, solid friends. People tend to talk about hanging out or doing something but as you are talking about it both of you already know that it will never happen. So while in general, I cannot complain about people since they are very friendly to foreigners I have not made any real friends.

Language

However, not making friends might also have something to do with the fact that my Portuguese wasn’t really good enough to speak much when I arrived here and most people don’t really speak English. While it has improved greatly (especially my understanding of native speakers) I am still missing the practice to come up with words quickly enough to have a fluent conversation. Also, slang is still an issue while I have learned some of it there seems to be an endless amount of slang terms that I will probably never know (the fact that Brazilian Portuguese slang changes quickly and varies by region isn’t helping either):

Food

I have a love-hate relationship with Brazilian food. There’s some food I really enjoy but then there is even more food that I don’t particularly like. The food that I did enjoy seemed to get too monotonous quickly. In general Brazilian cuisine tends to be very much meat-based (being a vegetarian is still somewhat rare here) with carbs also playing a big role. As someone who prefers to eat a bit more plant-based and lighter it was a bit difficult to imagine eating a typical Brazilian diet every day. But of course, this wasn’t really an issue I just bought my vegetables in the supermarket and prepared them the same way I would have at home. But I did miss typical dishes from home and also Maki with avocado or cucumber (for some reason they only have sushi with actual fish here).

Money

Brazil is not as cheap as some other Latin American countries, especially Rio is quite expensive. I would say on average the living expenses here are as much as in other European cities (not London or Paris). The prices for food are pretty moderate with imported goods, of course, being more expensive. The metro is cheap compared to European standards and while it does cover much less area than the underground systems in most other major cities it really does take you pretty much everywhere that you’ll need to go. Uber is also surprisingly cheap. If you can split the ride it might just end up being cheaper than the metro ticket. My monthly living expenses without trips and rent were around: €500.

Housing

The rent prices vary greatly depending on the area you live in, however, in general, the standard of living is lower so even if you pay €500 a month the apartment might have all the necessities but often just doesn’t look as pretty (not an issue just something to keep in mind). I personally chose to live in an apartment in Ipanema which I shared with another girl from my university we paid about €500/month each. When choosing an area to live in you should keep in mind that there are areas that are not so safe. Personally, we booked our apartment on Airbnb but many people find theirs on facebook or upon arrival.

Trips

I managed to go on quite a few trips but getting around Brazil can quickly get complicated and expensive since it is such a huge country. If you have a place you already know you would like to visit I recommend booking the airplane ticket as early as possible the closer you get to the date the more expensive they tend to get. The cheapest airplane ticket I managed to get was about €70 (one hour flight, no checked bags). There are buses almost everywhere and they can be significantly cheaper however it is debatable whether you would rather pay €60 and drive for 14 hours or pay €150 - 200 and fly for 2 to 3 hours. For shorther distances buses are of course completely fine and you can book most of them online or buy a ticket directly at the central bus station.

Personally, I visited:

Paraty Salvador Belo Horizonte Ouro Preto Buzios Blumenau Curitiba Porto Alegre São Paulo Petropolis

Education system

Like in many countries getting a good education in Brazil means getting a private education. Since my university had a contract with a private university that’s the kind of educational environment I experienced. Personally, education is a topic I feel quite passionate about or more specifically I feel quite passionate about the belief that education should be as accessible as possible to as many people as possible (I am not going to go in-depth here about why..). The Brazilian education system is built in a way that greatly advantages people who are more well off than the average Brazilian. I personally was not a fan of my university since I felt the entire thing was just this bubble that didn’t in any way mirror the Rio that I experienced outside of university. 

Society

I touched upon this briefly in the previous section. One of the most interesting dynamics about Brazil is the society. There seems to be this strange dichotomy were Brazilians are proud of the diversity of their population yet there is some kind of deeply ingrained, probably to a large degree unconscious (like in many countries), racism going on. People who are noticeably darker in complexion are mostly still part of the poorest of the population while the richest look astonishingly European and nothing is done to change this. Brazilians are proud of their diversity yet the order of their society still reflects one of the colonial times. (I am in no way saying that every Brazilian supports the way things are. This is more a reflection of the politics going on in the country which are unfortunately corrupt to a large degree so we cannot exactly consolidate the current societal state with the actual opinion of people)

Touristy things + Leisure time

Now for a lighter topic. There is plenty to see in Rio and when I say plenty I mean a lot as in I didn’t even manage to see everything that I wanted to see. I plan to make a more comprehensive post on places to see in Rio (well-known ones and some not so well known). Leisure time is to a large degree spent outdoors on the beach, hiking, or at parties. One disadvantage of Rio is that it is a quite outdoorsy city so when it rains there aren’t many options for entertainment.

Party and dating culture

Parties here are a lot more spontaneous often happening on the street in front of university buildings. They are also a bit wilder it is quite common for one person to make out with several different people a night and it is almost unheard of that someone doesn’t drink alcohol. Dating culture from what I experienced (which is admittedly somewhat limited) is very relaxed. Casual relationships are extremely common and break-ups are usually quite pragmatic. At the same time, the macho culture is still a bit more prevalent than in many European countries. As someone who is introverted and doesn’t really enjoy casual relationships or just dating for the sake of dating it wasn’t my thing but each to their own.

Conclusion

Would I want to live here forever? No. Did I really like the experience? Yes. Brazil is what I like to refer to as an “extrovert country”. So as an introvert it can be quite exhausting to navigate the social life here even more so than in european countries since people here are very talkative and open. However, this was a thing I was prepared for and since it was a dream of mine to got to Brazil one day despite that I can’t say that I didn’t have a great time and that it wasn’t worth it. I definitely see myself coming back to see more of the country. I simply personally enjoy the openness for a short period of time but it would probably be too much for me to live like this for the rest of my life. I am also quite thankful to have been born in a european country with free education, pretty good public health care, less corruption and overall more stability. Still I would not ever tell anyone NOT to go to Brazil, or Rio especially. I like to think of Rio as the bad boy of cities. It might be a little dangerous or more uncomfortable than others but it’s just so pretty, fascinating and mysterious you can’t help but fall in love. 

[thatwitchglenda]

BASIC INFORMATION

FULL NAME: Glenda Calliope Chittock  PRONUNCIATION:  /ˈɡlɛndə  ka-LYE-oh-pee MEANING: Fair and good; beautiful voice REASONING: Glenda was a sort of ‘pick a name, any name’ sort of choice. Calliope is her paternal grandmothers name. NICKNAME(S): Glen, G  PREFERRED NAME(S): She doesn’t really prefer nicknames to her full name, so really it’s up to whoever is talking to her.  BIRTH DATE: October 3, 2000 AGE: 19 ZODIAC: Libra GENDER: Female PRONOUNS: She/her ROMANTIC ORIENTATION: Heteromantic SEXUAL ORIENTATION: Heterosexual  NATIONALITY: English ETHNICITY: Colombian/Mexican CURRENT LOCATION: While she’s shared a flat with Amelia in muggle London for some time, the two girls are currently in the process of moving to the Peakes. LIVING CONDITIONS: See above ^ TITLE(S): n/a

BACKGROUND

BIRTH PLACE: Mould-on-the-Wold HOMETOWN:  Mould-on-the-Wold, a quiet all wizarding village  SOCIAL CLASS: Middle class EDUCATION LEVEL: Hogwarts. While the end of her 7th year was interrupted, Glenda was in the process of and has since completed NEWT examination 

BLOOD STATUS: Pureblood, although her family is so far down the ranks it doesn’t say much.  FATHER: Augustine Chittock MOTHER: Collette Chittock nee Alderton SIBLING(S): None BIRTH ORDER: n/a CHILDREN: n/a PET(S): None. She never got one when she went to Hogwarts, but she’s been thinking about getting a cat for some time.  OTHER IMPORTANT RELATIVES: Honestly, the Chittock’s have very little family outside their immediate circle PREVIOUS RELATIONSHIPS: Peter Pettigrew ARRESTS?: None PRISON TIME?: N/a

OCCUPATION & INCOME

PRIMARY SOURCE OF INCOME: Working as Sienna Rowle’s stylist/assistant SECONDARY SOURCE OF INCOME: Sponsorship through her podcast CONTENT WITH THEIR JOB (OR LACK THERE OF)?: Very content. The podcast and getting to work with people she really admires is basically a dream come true for her. Working with Sienna, on the other hand, is just super fun? She actually really enjoys it and she can’t deny that the benefits of the job (ie pretty great pay, tagging along on trips, etc is awesome as well) PAST JOB(S): Internship at the WWN SPENDING HABITS: She used to spend way more than she has. Now she can actually afford to buy the things she likes but really she’s just... lowkey a shopaholic? She likes to shop, she loves to buy things for other people.  MOST VALUABLE POSSESSION: 

SKILLS & ABILITIES

LANGUAGE(S) SPOKEN: English  DRIVE?: Barely. Her family does own a car, simply because they live outside of London and relying on the floo and apparition constantly just isn’t an option. But she never properly learned how to drive? She’s driven it maybe a handful of times and is basically an old lady at the wheel.  JUMP-STAR A CAR?: LOL  CHANGE A FLAT TIRE?: Definitely not  RIDE A BICYCLE?: Yes SWIM?: Yes PLAY AN INSTRUMENT?: She used to play the piano fairly well but she hasn’t touched one since she was at least fifteen. It’s unlikely she could do more than a few cords and a few songs burned into memory.  PLAY CHESS?: Nope BRAID HAIR?: Yes, she loves to braid her hair! Her mum used to dutch braid her hair every night before bed and so she usually sleeps in braids out of habit? Girl likes her braids.  TIE A TIE?: Yes, she learned before Hogwarts on her father. Frankly, he liked to pretend that he couldn’t, it was very cute but also pretty horrifying until she got the hang of it.  PICK A LOCK?: She probably thinks she’d be able to do so with a bobby pin if she tried (thanks to all those muggle films), but thankfully, there’s alohamora. 

PHYSICAL APPEARANCE & CHARACTERISTICS

FACE CLAIM: Cierra Ramirez EYE COLOR: Dark brown HAIR COLOR: Dark brown, almost black HAIR TYPE/STYLE: She’s always kept it fairly long and can pretty much count the times she’s cut her hair in her life. Depending on her mood she’ll straighten it or just curl it; but Glenda’s gotten pretty decent at updos in the last year or so. She’ll throw in the occasional space buns or whatnot.  GLASSES/CONTACTS?:  Glasses but really only for reading far away/watching television. At Hogwarts she constantly forgot to take them to class with her, which often resulted in needing to take notes from whoever was sitting next to her. She’s gotten much better at wearing them when she actually needs them.  DOMINANT HAND: Right handed HEIGHT: 5′1″ or 155 cm WEIGHT: We don’t need to know that  BUILD: Petite/curvy EXERCISE HABITS: Honestly, she doesn’t really go to the gym unless someone forces her to go with them. Back at school when Amelia was on the quidditch team, the girls would regularly work out together. Now she more so relies on youtube videos and a yoga mat to get a workout done in her room TATTOOS: None, although she’s not opposed  PIERCINGS: She’s had the standard lobe piercings for as long as she can remember, but has gotten some over the years. Two on each lobe, as well as her helix and tragus on one side, and rook on the other.  MARKS/SCARS: Most of her scrapes were healed before they ever got a chance to scar; but she does have one particularly notable one on the back of her neck. Not having listened to her mum, she’d hurt herself and terrified of getting in trouble, had hidden the pretty large cut away. Sadly, it had resulted in dittany not being used soon enough.  NOTABLE FEATURES: None USUAL EXPRESSION: LOL let’s just say resting bitch face.  CLOTHING STYLE: Honestly, it’s always changing. Glenda’s super into what’s trendy and ‘in’ and her style really reflects that. She loves bright colors and things that make her stand out (especially given that she’s so short), and her staple is heels. She honestly almost always has some sort of heel on.  JEWELRY: She basically always wears her mothers necklace that was given to her before leaving for Hogwarts. It’s a pretty simple design, just a small pendant with a tiny wildflower in resin. Earrings are also a staple for her, she rarely takes them out and is always sporting something. ALLERGIES: Pollen, latex, dogs. Sad. DIET: She’ll literally try anything once  PHYSICAL AILMENTS: None to make note of

PSYCHOLOGY

MORAL ALIGNMENT: True Neutral TEMPERAMENT: Sanguine PRIMARY INTELLIGENCE TYPE: Musical Intelligence  APPROXIMATE IQ: 121 MENTAL CONDITIONS/DISORDERS: None SOCIABILITY: Emotive  PHOBIA(S): Touching raw cotton, spiders ADDICTION(S): At most her phone DRUG USE: Occasionally will smoke some weed but more socially than anything else ALCOHOL USE: Again occasionally and as a social thing PRONE TO VIOLENCE?: Not really. Although she might want to sometimes, Glenda’s never actually hit anyone

MANNERISMS

SPEECH STYLE: Very casual QUIRKS: Her height, she’s so short. She talks pretty loudly and very quickly compared to others, she’s definitely that person that you have to remind to speak quieter sometimes. Very extroverted HOBBIES: Roller skating, baking HABITS: She has pretty much the same wake up routine? Cannot function without making some tea in the morning.  NERVOUS TICKS: Lip nibbling. So much lip nibbling. When she’s uncomfortable or nervous or basically anything other than neutral.   She also tends to wring her hands when she’s nervous and she’ll fiddle with her rings or any jewelry she might have on. DRIVES/MOTIVATIONS: Honestly, she’s just always trying to one-up herself. It’s not that she necessarily has to prove anything to anyone accept herself.  FEARS: Being mediocre. Although she wouldn’t admit it, she’s terrified of people hating or disliking her when she does actually put herself out there. POSITIVE TRAITS: NEGATIVE TRAITS: SENSE OF HUMOR: DO THEY CURSE OFTEN?: Not too much, but she doesn’t mind cursing and regularly does so CATCHPHRASE(S): None, really? 

FAVORITES

ACTIVITY: Listening to music tbh.  ANIMAL: To have? Cats. To just like admire? Sloths, man.  BEVERAGE: Tea COLOR: Pink DESIGNER: Marc Jacobs FOOD: Straight up just some farfalle with pesto and loaded with pine nuts. Topped with some parm. Amazing.  FLOWER: Daffodils  GEM: Amethyst  HOLIDAY:  Halloween MODE OF TRANSPORTATION: Apparition  MOVIE: Ever After MUSICAL ARTIST: Tove Lo maybe? Stevie Nicks? SCENERY: Some pretty fucking mountains, man.  SCENT: Woodsy, musky scents. Or rose.  SPORT: Honestly, none SPORTS TEAM: ^^^  TELEVISION SHOW: Superstore, Arrested Development. ...Greys Anatomy WEATHER: Snow!!  VACATION DESTINATION: She’s gone nowhere really, like, she’s been on one holiday because of Sienna and so I don’t think she actually has a favorite. 

ATTITUDES

GREATEST DREAM: That her podcast really, really takes off. That she becomes properly relevant in the music industry as someone who genuinely has something to say.  GREATEST FEAR: Irrelevance, but also loneliness. She doesn’t want to base anything of herself on love or relationships but she definitely has this fear of ultimately being alone. Or not even being alone, but being lonely.  MOST AT EASE WHEN: In her room, hanging out with her best friends and listening to music. It’s peaceful, it’s happy.  LEAST AT EASE WHEN: In a new environment with new people that she doesn’t necessarily know or trust. She’s not necessarily uncomfortable, but she’s more on guard than in any other situation. 

[prorevenge]

Owner screws me over, screws up(s) his business.

To start, I won’t be saying the name of the shipping company franchise I worked for, suffice to say the title is very telling. This is a rather long story, so buckle in. You can skip the backstory and look for the revenge near the bottom. TL:DR at the end.

The Backstory

About five or six years ago I was relatively new to the workforce, having worked one minimum wage job at Mickey D’s. I had been there almost two years, but had little experience elsewhere. Well this one lady always came through early every morning to order a large Diet Coke, and would take a few minutes to talk to me. I mentioned to her that I was displeased with my bosses and the working conditions, and she invited me to come apply for a job at Not FedEx because they were always running low on employees! That should have been my first red flag.

The second red flag went completely over my head, because at this point I was 17 with no previous job experience. When I walked in for an interview, the boss (who I will call Jeph, because it sounds close enough to his name to allow him to remain anonymous) told me it would take five minutes. I wasn’t asked about my relevant experience, my goals within the company, or even told what position I was applying for. I assumed all interviews were different and went along with it, and started the next week with training. Everything went well for the first month. I basically just packed boxes, took down customer information, and sorted mail into the mailboxes we managed. The real trouble started after I was given my one month performance review.

I was deemed to be a valuable asset to Jeph’s franchise, and rightfully so. At 17 I was able to lift more and work better than the 20 and 30 something employees, and due to the work ethic my parents drilled into me I was never slacking off while at work. I was then informed that I would be swapping between Jeph’s two franchises, roughly 30 miles apart. (For context, the franchise I APPLIED TO WORK AT was roughly a mile from my house, so I could walk if I couldn’t get a ride.) Every other day I had to drive out to the location and somehow justify this with my slightly above minimum wage job. ($7.50 for those not in Texas.)

Overall my boss was a massive douche. His physical appearance could best be described as “troll like” with a shirt almost bursting, the top always undone to showcase his aging chest hair, and a face not unlike that of A&F owner Mike Jeffries. He openly cheated on his wife, bragging to coworkers about it constantly. He charged people one dollar for any amount of extra tape they needed on their package, despite the fact that we got roughly two rolls for that price in bulk. He had a special price calculator installed on the computers that charged people roughly 10% more than the package would be elsewhere. He would push employees (who he insisted didn’t work in customer service but sales) to never offer anything less than three day shipping even though we offered standard 7+ days and even cheaper options. I watched him actively lie to customers, claiming it was the price they had to pay blah blah blah, and almost yell at them to go to another store if they didn’t like it. But I digress.

Now here was the first dickish thing that my boss did to me specifically. Until this point, I was only working around 20 hours. After I graduated to working at both stores, Jeph had me sign a brand new W-2 for his second store, which was under a different company. (He owned both, naming one Blue (name for a .44 caliber bullet) and Blue (proper name for visible light)). Again, I had very little idea that this wrong because I had never had to deal with this before. He proceed to add another 20 or so hours to my schedule, bringing me up to 40 hours or more. But since I worked for two separate companies I never earned a dime of overtime or benefits of any kind.

At this point, I started accruing more and more duties, as my boss and coworkers started to trust me more and more. Buy my fourth month of employment (out of a total of eight) I was performing managerial duties such as: opening the store, counting the registers, closing the store, ordering product such as boxes and tape, and preparing shipments for transport. The work alone justified a raise, not to mention the hours I was being asked to work. However when I floated this idea by my boss, he very rudely insisted that since he had a manager for each store already, I was just doing my job and couldn’t earn a cent more.

Then came the second dickish move. We had a large company contract some drop off stuff with us, a telecom company we will say rhymes with Hey Tea and Tea. Customers would bring in their old cable boxes, wires, remotes and the like, and we would scan them and ship them back to Hey Tea and Tea, the company THAT LEGALLY OWNED ALL OF THIS HARDWARE. The customers would not pay us a nickel, but the telecom company would pay almost double what it actually cost to ship the package. There is no way Jeph could look that gift horse in the mouth and decide he was still owed the stable and all the horse’s tack as well, right? Surprise, surprise, Jeph had to take it one step further. ANY and ALL parts/cables/WiFi adapters/USB drives the customer returned to us that didn’t have a scan tag on them, Jeph would pull aside and either strip for copper or sell on eBay. And he would force us, the employees to package his eBay sales or copper wiring into boxes and ship them for him. He even popped batteries out of remotes and recycled them somewhere to get a tax credit. None of his employees ever saw a penny of this money (not that I would have accepted it). We estimated he raked in roughly three to four thousand a month just from stealing alone. For those of you bad at math, that is the price of TWO brand new 2018 Honda Civics.

The Revenge

The third (and fourth) final dick moves are what solidified my hatred for this boss, and my desire to strike back. They both came in the same week, roughly the same time, and both viscerally repulsive. My favorite coworker had recently gotten pregnant, and although the father got the hell out of dodge when he found out, she was doing very well for herself. She and I frequently closed together, and she promised she would bring the baby to sit in the back for the dull hours we had to kill from 6-10. We also had an annual store review from corporate that week, so our boss called a late night meeting after we closed one day. Our boss started out by saying that he was proud of our pregnant coworker for working so hard even with her “disability.” (Yes, even his sense of humor was slimy.) Then, in front of all fifteen employees, HE FIRED HER. He told her that because the Christmas season was coming up, and she would only slow down the store being pregnant and all, he had to let her go.

After she left, hatred seething in her eyes, he turned back to the fourteen of us who were left stunned, and continued on like nothing had happened. He proceeded to tell each of us our jobs for this weekend, leaving mine for last. My job, because I used to drive a decently sized mini van, was to ferry the corporate required supplies, cash for the safe, and OUR ONE WORKING FIRE EXTINGUISHER between the two stores while he kept corporate distracted between visits.

At this point I had taken enough shit from this guy, and I formulated my plan. I started by calling the Hey Tea and Tea fraud department, and telling them everything I knew. I took pictures and emailed them directly to the rep I was talking to, who seemed a little too excited about fraud being committed. I then scheduled a visit from a Hey Tea and Tea rep at the same time corporate was supposed to show up. My next step was to call Not FedEx and explain exactly what I just told y’all, with a few extra things thrown in that I couldn’t share for privacy reasons. They promised to send a rep as well, to the same store, at the same time.

The final step was put into action that Saturday. I dutifully loaded up my van with the supplies, cash (upwards of $4000 if I remember correctly), and fire extinguisher, and headed out. Except I did the exact OPPOSITE of what Jeph wanted. I took the crap to the first store he owned, which was the second one to receive a visit. After he texted the team saying they were moving on, I packed up all the shit and drove it to the other store they just left. Now I am unsure exactly what happened at the other store, but from some coworkers I pieced together that the Not FedEx rep showed up right after I left, but didn’t stay long, and the Hey Tea and Tea rep showed up just before Jeph had arrived and had time to hide his ill gotten gains in his office. The one coworker who was close enough to the office during the corporate meeting said there was lots of angry words being thrown and threats being made towards Jeph and his position as a franchisee. He also lost his franchises the ability to ship for Hey Tea and Tea, at least for a period of time.

Regardless, the very next day I was off because I was (and as cliché as this sounds I swear to God it’s true) helping my grandfather who just got out of the hospital. I receive a call from Jeph, saying I needed to come in right away, and work a double shift as well as close the store. I told him I couldn’t do that, and I was taking a personal day. He fired me right then and there, citing my usage of the work computer to run a photoshop business during work hours. (I’m assuming he was referring to the graphic design work I did FOR HIM, FOR FREE, which he asked me to learn how to do.)

The sad epilogue to this whole story is that he is currently still in business, and still running the same scams he was before. He WAS however fined for not having proper supplies in his stores, as well as forced to use corporate’s package rates rather than his own. So in some small way my revenge worked. He currently has a two star review on Yelp for both of his his businesses, and I hope to have a party outside his store one day when it goes belly up.

TL:DR: Boss is a total douche bag to me and customers, steals from a contract company, fires a pregnant woman for “slowing down the store” then gets his ass reamed by corporate and loses the major contract.

(source) (story by Chewbacca_Q_Wookie)

[lakeham]

CHLOE ORTEGA is 30 YEARS OLD, resides in DOWNTOWN and has lived in Lakeham for 3 YEARS. She is FEMALE and works as a JUNIOR ASSOCIATE AT ANDERTON CATES. She is portrayed by NATHALIE KELLEY  and is played by JEN.

Trigger Warnings: Alcoholism, divorce.

Jacob Cates was always a hard-working individual. Descending from a middle class background in Lakeham, he always had to fight for what he wanted in life. Money wasn’t a luxury he had growing up, but he knew that when he had a family of his own one day, he’d want them to have everything he never had. That’s why he became a lawyer, and when he met Annamaria Ortega, he was going to do everything he could do to make her his. Annamaria wasn’t like any other woman he’d met before. She was the type of woman who could put any man under her spell. On the surface, she wore a halo around her head. She was sweet, caring and loyal. As an opera singer from New York City, anybody could be easily convinced. However, there was far more to Annamaria beyond what those closest to her knew. She was entitled and manipulative. She had the cunning ability to get underneath anyone’s skin and get them to do as she pleased. Wrapping people around her little finger was a task that came all too easy to her. Jacob seemed to be blinded by the facade she kept up so well. The pair were together for a year when they had their first child, and got married whilst Annamaria was still pregnant. Their first daughter, whom they named Chloe, became the pinnacle of their relationship. Jacob had heard rumors of Annamaria’s affairs, but he didn’t want to believe a word of it. He loved his wife and daughter, far greater than some gossip he’d been told by a jealous colleague. Just a year after Chloe was born, they had another child, who they named Isaac. And for many years after their second birth, their marriage seemed blissful. Annamaria retired from singing to look after the children whilst Jacob became their sole income.

Regrettably, Jacob’s hard work was never enough for Annamaria. She was used to the lavish lifestyle, having grown up in a wealthy family. She once believed that their children would be enough to convince herself that they were all she’d ever need, but her impatience became her weakness time and time again. To Jacob’s knowledge, Annamaria spent most of every day in the safety of their home, taking care of Chloe and Isaac. In reality, she’d hire help to look after them whilst she’d be off having her own fun with a new man every month. Each payment was made from her own private bank account, therefore they were never traceable for Jacob. It was only when a family friend spied her in a local restaurant that the news got out and inevitably traveled back to her husband. Though instead of letting anger and hatred take control, Jacob kept a cool head and decided he was more disappointed and hurt. When he asked Annamaria why, he was only met with silence. He was willing to forgive her, for the sake of his love for her and their children, but when she simply shrugged, he could tell she simply didn’t care. A divorce wasn’t something he’d ever seen coming from the woman he’d fallen so hard for, but when she filed for one, he knew he had to sign on the dotted line. This was when he realized for the first time that the Annamaria he’d loved all that time didn’t actually exist. She was just a figment of his imagination; a woman he’d wanted her to be, rather than who she actually was.

The divorce was a messy one. Despite Annamaria claiming to be indifferent, she still wanted to see her children. Though Chloe and Isaac were living with their father, Annamaria had been renting an apartment downtown, where they stayed at the weekends. It became a game of back and forth for a long time, with Annamaria demanding to have her children for more than two days a week. But Jacob soon discovered he didn’t stand much of a chance for full custody when Annamaria’s father became involved. He was a powerful man who had friends in high places. After much dispute, an agreement was made. Isaac would remain in Lakeham with his father, whilst Chloe would return to New York City to live with her mother. Chloe was eight when she moved to the Big Apple, and though apprehensive at first, the little brunette took after her mother in more ways than one. She was sure of herself for such a young age and making friends came easy to her. Like Annamarie, she had the skill to make people like and need her presence. She missed her father and brother, but keeping in touch over the phone seemed enough for her when she was starting to like the life her mother was helping her to create. Annamaria always favored her daughter. Perhaps it was because she was female and that Chloe reminded her so much of herself when she was her age. Annamaria was raised in a poised environment, and now she could finally do the same for Chloe. Adorning her in make-up, jewellery and pretty dresses, she even had Chloe taught etiquette and singing lessons. She became the miniature version of what her mother was.

Chloe naturally became an egocentric adult. She attended private school for many of her pre adolescent years, but was eventually homeschooled when she reached fifteen. This was due to the fact that Annamaria had applied her daughter to many modelling agencies until she was accepted into one of the most prestigious agencies in the city. For the next few years, this was what Chloe’s life entailed. Constantly having to live up to the expectations of not only her mother, but her own modelling agent who had her on a strict diet and seemingly had full control over how she looked and what she wore. They even had power over what she did, where she went and who she was friends with. Chloe often beared a brave smile and simply went along with it, not wanting to disappoint anyone. She didn’t want her mother to think she was weak. Chloe was very similar to her mother in many ways. She was conceited and arrogant, but exuded confidence and kindness. She wanted everyone to see the nicer side of her, so that it could benefit her at a later date. Annamaria taught her that manipulating your way through life was how you got what you wanted. But with Chloe, there was also a softer side; one that meant she would sometimes feel guilty for tricking people the way she did. Making people you care about believe you’re something you’re not made her feel like a liar. At the age of nineteen, Chloe decided enough was enough. She wanted to be more honest with herself. Deciding to give up the life of modelling, the life her mother had forced upon her, Chloe enrolled at Harvard University to study Political Science. It was a move nobody saw coming; especially Annamaria. However, everyone’s surprise only drove Chloe all the more. She decided it was time to start living by her own standards and not other people.

Harvard was easy to get into because her family had money. Friends were easy to make because her family had money. The Ortega name on her mother’s side was well-known because her grandfather was once a reputable judge who had long since retired. Her grandmother had also been an opera singer, which originally inspired her mother. Her grandfather’s side had great significance within law and politics, which was what initially what made it so effortless for Chloe to get her foot in the door. She never had any particular interest in the field. Sometimes she believed she only chose it as her major not only because she knew it would be easy for her to get into law school with her grandfather’s help, but because it was also the complete opposite of what her mother expected from her; to choose the career path her father had chosen. Chloe was more driven than Annamaria, and that was a remarkable difference between the mother and daughter. She was determined not to let the Ortega name be known when she was attending both university and law school. She was a Cates whilst she was there, and though she was still self-absorbed and somewhat selfish at times, people seemed to accept her as she was. At least this time she wasn’t lying about her true self, and that’s what Chloe’s objective had been.

❝ A GOOD HALF OF THE ART OF LIVING IS RESILIENCE.❞

When she graduated, it took a while for Chloe to settle into the routine of adult life. At twenty-seven, she was still used to the idea of studying during the day and partying at night. To suddenly have to get a job and start to earn her own way was somewhat daunting. Unlike her mother, Chloe did want to have money that she could say was hers and no one else’s. She didn’t want to take favors from her grandparents. But letting go wasn’t easy. Chloe knew she’d need to complete her bar exam before she’d be able to practice law, but finding a job in the area wasn’t easy either. She considered asking her grandfather for further help. After all, it was his influence that got her into law school. However, something told her not to seek his help. This time, she needed to do this on her own. Contemplating over many weeks, Chloe made the unruly decision to go back to Lakeham to reconnect with her father and brother. Naturally, it was a decision that Annamaria disapproved of, but this made it all the more enticing for Chloe to go. Though she hadn’t had a lot of contact with her father and brother over the years, they were surprisingly a lot more open and welcoming when she told them of the news that she’d be in their lives a lot more. She lived with Isaac for a short period, until she was able to stand on her own two feet. She joined a team of paralegals as a project assistant, and from there her career simply built itself. People seemed to warm up more to who Chloe was becoming. It was as though being around Jacob and Isaac helped to dissolve the narcissist her mother had made her. Nevertheless, parts of the old Chloe still reappear. It’s what makes her the good lawyer she is today.

Chloe works for her father’s law firm in downtown Lakeham, at Anderton Cates where her father is a named partner. She begun simply by helping out the paralegals, but quickly became a junior associate. She made it very clear to everyone that she wanted to make it on her own; that it wasn’t her father’s influence that got her to where she is. She keeps her grandfather’s name tight-lipped. If anyone found out it was him who helped her into Harvard, she believes she’ll be ridiculed for the rest of her career.

Within the three years she’s been back in Lakeham, Chloe has been both married and separated. Striking up a friendship with one of her father’s clients was how it begun, and Chloe even helped him with some legal advice here and there. An attraction grew from Chloe’s point of view, which led to feelings, which let to dating. She was then more than a little surprised when Gabriel proposed to her and she found herself saying yes. After a small ceremony, the two were only married three months before Chloe found out something she probably shouldn’t have, leading to their ultimate separation. It’s been nine months, and Chloe still finds excuses to avoid a divorce.

The career path Chloe has chosen means she works more than she sleeps. She likes to let others believe that she can handle the pressure and that everything is fine, but the truth is, she has those moments where she has to work hard to catch her breath. Because of the stress, Chloe has a drinking problem she doesn’t let others privy to.

(+) Outgoing, independent, good-natured. (-) Self-centred, opportunistic, shrewd.

[nataliesewell]

monster prom pop quiz results

I was bored, so I decided to try and record all the questions and answers in Monster Prom’s Stupidest Pop Quiz Ever(tm). It’s really likely I haven’t found them all, so I’ll come back and add to this from time to time.

The pop quiz consists of three questions; the first two go towards determining your highest stats at the beginning of the game, while the third chooses your possible prom date (this isn’t set in stone; you can still try to pursue a different character in the actual game). The order of the questions is randomized.

Other links: Vera Walkthrough

You can find the questions and their results under the cut!

stat questions

What is your spirit emoji?

a. Caucasian guy with a turban because fuck stereotypes. +CREATIVITY

b. Octopus emoji. Best animal on Earth. I know 5 mixed drinks, 3 drug cocktails, and 17 sex positions that involve one or several octupi. +FUN

c. Snowman, because that motherfucker is in the middle of a blizzard and he’s fuckin’ smiling. He doesn’t give a fuck about blizzards. And he has a kickass hat. +BOLD

It’s your chance to fix global warming. Go ahead!

a. Global warming isn’t real. I invented it, and now science is claiming authorship because science is a lame copycat with no original ideas. +CREATIVITY

b. Nah, the world is doomed. But I’ll start investing in ships and start a profitable business for the “soon to be covered by water” world. +WEALTH

c. It’s time to be a real hero: I’ll lead a mission to the sun in order to... invite the sun to the party of its life! We’ll have so many hilarious misadventures that the sun will eventually become... cooler. ;) +FUN

Be a visionary: what will the next big social media craze be?

a. Bull$hit: it’s Facebook, but each time someone shares news that isn’t supported by real facts, they’re taxed, and the money goes to the people exposed to that bullshit. +WEALTH

b. Greek Agoras: like literal Greek agoras re-instated in our cities. Places where philosophy and arts are discussed by the greater minds. That’s the social media I want to log into! +SMARTS

c. Rbert: from now on, a socially awkward guy named Robert will do everything he’s commanded to do through the app by its users! +CHARM

You wish you were raised by...

a. A mysterious old man who saved me from the streets in order to raise me as his disciple in the ancient ways of rad DJing! +FUN

b. A pack of wild wolves... who also happens to be tech moguls who own some of the most profitable companies of Silicon Valley. They would be kick-ass role models AND wild wolves! Sick! +WEALTH

c. A really progressive marriage between a kick-ass venomous snake and... actual fire. I love fire and I see no issue with being raised by it. +BOLD

You build a 100ft statue commemorating an event so that in 1000 years archaeologists can learn something about the people of our time. What does the statue represent?

a. That glorious instant when your friend stopped you from texting embarrassing stuff to your ex while hella drunk. +FUN

b. That mind-blowing twist in your favourite TV show that clearly changed the life of everyone forever, unlike all that boring stuff they show on the news. +CREATIVITY

c. Your least favourite political figure... being devoured by rabid rhinoceri... which are also covered in badass tattoos. +BOLD

Which is the coolest mythological creature?

a. The invisible hand of the free market. +WEALTH

b. A sphinx... who’s super turnt up and ready to party! And she raps all her riddles (she still kills you if you don’t answer them correctly... but she raps the riddles)! +FUN

c. This weird creature I drew when I was six and which is clearly super derivative from other mythological creatures... but it’s super cool and it’s my OC and my spirit animal, okay? +CREATIVITY

You’re elected president for a day. What’s the first law you pass?

a. You can deduct taxes by writing sonnets instead. Amount of taxes deducted are calculated based on the beauty of the sonnets. +CREATIVITY

b. Trivia fact: presidents don’t pass laws... so is this a trick question or are you just being an idiot? +SMARTS

c. One dollar bills will now include a picture of me and the inscription “Beware: Too Much Awesomeness.” My presidency might last a day, but my fame will last forever! +CHARM

A radioactive possum just bit you... what superpowers did you get?

a. The superpower of always choosing the right combination of emojis to get the desired reaction from all people: seducing my loved ones, burning my enemies, settling an argument, and even conveying complex emotional thoughts. +CHARM

b. Uh, probably rabies? I’d go to a hospital immediately. +SMARTS

c. The incredible power of writing fanfiction so compelling that the actual creators of the TV shows decide to go with my ideas and crazy ships. +CREATIVITY

School is outdated and lame. We need a new school subject asap!

a. Critical thought. I mean... damn, this country could really use a subject like that in schools. +SMARTS

b. Turning people into your puppets through emotional warfare and deception 101. +CHARM

c. How to correctly punch a crocodile without terrible consequences. +BOLD

If you had to have sex with animal... which animal would it be?

(You don’t get six answers; the three answers you get are randomized.)

a. A great white shark. I have to fuck an animal, let’s at least make it a story worth telling! +CHARM

b. A swan. They’re classy. Plus it reminds me of that myth of Leda and the Swan, so at least by bestiality standards it has a certain chic appeal. +CREATIVITY

c. A human being, because I’m the kind of douchebag who loves to find loopholes in stupid questions like this one. +SMARTS

d. A purebred horse. At least I can keep his semen and sell it. It’s worth a lot! Who said there was no silver lining to bestiality? +WEALTH

e. A dolphin. They’re the only other animal that fucks just for pleasure, so at least we can both do our best to have a good time, right? +FUN

f. No on can make me fuck an animal. If I fucked an animal, it’d be of my own free will. As a matter of fact, I already have fucked an animal, so the joke’s on you, pal. +BOLD

The coolest reality show would be...

a. Twelve experts on the various arts of seduction live in a house where they must face a common challenge: seducing a potato into marriage... somehow. +CHARM

b. Eight rich people fight in weekly challenges to see who’s the best at giving money to you. +WEALTH

c. People in various positions of power must face all sorts of questions relevant to their field, and if they fail, they lose their jobs... and society wins. +SMARTS

You get the chance to produce a movie. It’s based on...

a. The most influential Russian novelists of the XIX century... have gone nuts! They don’t remember anything about last night and now they can’t find the manuscript of The Brothers Karamazov; and Dostoyevsky has to deliver it TODAY! +FUN

b. Two cool guys walking away from rad explosions. And they don’t look at the explosions. THEY DON’T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT THE EXPLOSIONS! They reflect on life and love... AND IT IS SUPER DOPE AND KICK-ASS BECAUSE THEY DO SO WALKING AWAY FROM NEVER-ENDING EXPLOSIONS! +BOLD

c. Something about superheroes, but with a love triangle between a beauty yet somehow relatable girl (maybe she’s always stating she’s a mess?) and two of the super hot superheroes, which are also like vampires or pirates or both. Instant hit! +WEALTH

Democracy is just broken. What would be the best way of choosing the leaders of modern society?

a. Whoever can play the most heartbreaking violin solo wins. +CREATIVITY

b. You put all the candidates in an empty room... with a wild grizzly bear. Whoever kills the bear should be our president. If everyone dies, then it’s obvious: the bear should be our president. +BOLD

c. We create a reality show called “America’s Next Top President” where the candidates compete in all kinds of physical and mental challenges. Voter turnout would increase and we would turn a profit on it! +FUN

If you could put a curse on your worst enemy, what would it do?

a. I’d curse them to fall in love with a wonderful person and be happily married before they realize that all this time... their partner was a wild panther in disguise! Then the panther viciously devours my enemy. Classic! +BOLD

b. The curse of always meeting obnoxious people at parties who are super into new fad diets that feel the need to explain them in detail. +CHARM

c. You can’t rely on the effectiveness of a curse. I prefer to take care of my enemies the old-fashioned way: by exposing them to unsafe doses of radiation over the course of several years. +SMARTS

What would be the coolest prize you could find in your box of cereal?

a. A tiny piece of sharp metal, so every scoop will be full of thrill and danger! +BOLD

b. The phone number of the sexy tiger on the front of the box. He’s so passionate about breakfast and health that he’s surely also a grrreat lover. +CHARM

c. A sample of a more nutritious breakfast option, so people are encouraged to stop eating that colorful crap. +SMARTS

What inanimate object do you think would make the best girlfriend or boyfriend, provided you went criminally insane?

a. A human-size pillow depicting a character created by myself. As a matter of fact, I have all the needed paperwork and I’m only waiting for the conservative narrow-minded laws of our country to finally step forward into waifu and husbando territory, as was clearly intended by God. +CREATIVITY

b. A dildo, duh. +FUN

c. An ATM. Sugar baby life, here I come! +WEALTH

Which god do you pray to each night before sleeping?

a. Praying is kind of lame. I have a group text set up with some deities: Dionysus, Bastet, Loki... coolest cats in town. +CHARM

b. Praying is for fools. I took some compromising pics of a god molesting a tree, and now I blackmail him for whatever I want. A lot more effective. +SMARTS

c. Oh, I pray to all kinds of gods. I have this business where people pay me to deliver their prayers every night. I’ve even started to look for a Chinese factory to outsource the prayers. +WEALTH

prom date questions

What is the sexiest type of knowledge a lover can have?

a. How to set stuff on fire. ❤️DAMIEN

b. All the principles to build a financial empire. ❤️VERA

c. Lyrics to all Disney songs. ❤️MIRANDA

d. Obscure 80s movie trivia. ❤️LIAM

e. Sports things. ❤️SCOTT

f. How to make a killer cocktail out of anything. ❤️POLLY

Your partner just gave you a cool gift for your anniversary but you totally forgot! Quick, come up with an idea for a great gift!

a. The head of their fiercest enemy. ❤️VERA

b. A silly toy that makes silly noises. ❤️SCOTT

c. The abstract concept of gratefulness. ❤️LIAM

d. A pony. Always a pony. ❤️MIRANDA

e. Anything on fire. Or a weapon. No, no: a weapon on fire. ❤️DAMIEN

f. Anything capable of leading them to an overdose of some sorts. ❤️POLLY

What would be a deal-breaker for a potential lover?

a. The person lacks taste. ❤️LIAM

b. The person is mediocre. ❤️VERA

c. The person is a coward. ❤️DAMIEN

d. The person is boring. ❤️POLLY

e. The person hates the outdoors. ❤️SCOTT 

f. The person lacks manners. ❤️MIRANDA

What would be a killer accessory?

a. Sunglasses... at night. ❤️POLLY

b. A fabulous purse made from the skin of your worst enemy. ❤️VERA

c. Coolness itself. ❤️LIAM

d. Fancy brass knuckles. ❤️DAMIEN

e. A necklace with your own name... in case you forget! ❤️SCOTT

f. Shiny armor. ❤️MIRANDA

The world will end tomorrow... What will you do today?

a. Nobody ends the world but me! I’ll end the world today. ❤️DAMIEN

b. It’s okay! We invented the apocalypse to take care of the overpopulation of commoners. ❤️MIRANDA

c. I’ll finish my novel... whoever comes after the end should know my legacy! ❤️LIAM

d. 100 push-ups... no, no 200 push-ups! ❤️SCOTT

e. They always tell you the world is ending... I’ll profit on other people’s hysteria. ❤️VERA

f. I always party as if there were no tomorrow... so who cares? ❤️POLLY

Which criteria would you use to name your children?

a. Meh... no name? It’s just too much work! ❤️POLLY

b. I will research for a name that is pun-proof and joke-proof. No one will pick on them. ❤️VERA

c. A non-heteronormative name to give them freedom to define themselves on their own terms. ❤️LIAM

d. Just a swear word. ❤️DAMIEN

e. My name + “II” (the Second). ❤️MIRANDA

f. Something simple and friendly, like Bobby or Mary. ❤️SCOTT

If you were an ice cream... which flavour would you be?

a. Double creme de la Gruyere and meringues. ❤️LIAM

b. Spicy chocolate. No... chocolate on FIRE! ❤️DAMIEN

c. Success. ❤️VERA

d. Tequila and coke. ;) ❤️POLLY

e. Rainbows and gummy bears. ❤️MIRANDA

f. Meat! ❤️SCOTT

What would be your dream first date?

a. An art exhibition experimental enough to give you a seizure. ❤️LIAM

b. A sweaty and manly wrestling match. ❤️SCOTT

c. A professional meeting where you charm your date with some astonishing business advice! ❤️VERA

d. A wild party in international waters. ❤️POLLY

e. A lovely walk in the forest... after rescuing your date from a dragon! ❤️MIRANDA

f. Crimes. ❤️DAMIEN

You find a genie in a bottle. You can ask for whatever you want. What do you ask for?

a. A rainbow that you can eat! ❤️MIRANDA

b. I don’t ask for anything. I drink the genie from the bottle. I can grant my own wishes! ❤️DAMIEN

c. Before asking for anything, you try to negotiate up to the three standard wishes. ❤️VERA

d. Infinite confetti! ❤️POLLY

e. ...His friendship! ❤️SCOTT

f. Him to not be so cliched. Genies and wishes... so mainstream! ❤️LIAM

What would be the most appealing in a love partner?

a. A big... horn. ❤️DAMIEN

b. Sharp wits. ❤️LIAM

c. Kawaii eyes. ❤️MIRANDA

d. A very tsundere personality. ❤️VERA

e. Soft fur. ❤️SCOTT

f. A taste for party. ❤️POLLY