hostiae · 1 year ago
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↪ william birkin familial headcanons
i 100% subscribe to the idea that birkin killing irons (rest in hell) and slicing through the tyrant was birkin fighting through g to save sherry. yes, g targeted sherry for her genetics, but i think there are clear moments where birkin's lucidity breaks through the monster he's morphing into.
that's not to say that he deserves any father of the year awards. william's obsession with g makes him 100% distant, overworked, and reckless with the life of his family. but do i think he loved sherry? absolutely. do i think he was a good parent? no. fuck no.
i think having a family is his attempt at normalcy. i think he married annette because he loved her, but also because "that's what you do." he barely has a life outside of the life umbrella gave him. he's a researcher first, but having a family did make him happy. it is one of few things that he'd give his time to that wasn't related to his work.
most of all, i don't think he would have ever pushed sherry how he was pushed, nor want her to have an abnormal childhood like he did.
my headcanon for birkin is that he cut off all contact with his own parents as a young teenager. while he's been indoctrinated by umbrella and would say he thrived as a young researcher (he has a huge ego when it comes to being a child prodigy), he also feels like they happily would have sold him to the company. his parents knew the kind of genius they had on their hands and were willing to sacrifice raising a well-rounded, human child, for money, prestige, etc. he wouldn't do that to his own kid.
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theostrophywife · 1 year ago
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le coup de foudre.
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pairing: regulus black x reader.
song inspiration: my love mine all mine by mitski.
author's note: this was a result of me binging dune and call me by your name. whoever fancasted timothee chalamet as regulus deserves a forehead kith cause look at him. he's so boyfriend coded it makes me sick.
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Regulus Black did not believe in love at first sight. 
It was a foolish notion. One that contradicted his pragmatic beliefs. At his core, Regulus was a realist. In his world, love was not a luxury one could afford. Regulus was raised with the expectation to marry according to class, wealth, and most importantly, blood status. The noble and most ancient house of Black only took the purest of the pure. 
After all, toujours pur, always pure, has been his family’s motto for centuries. There has never been any doubt in his mind that he’d marry another member of the sacred twenty eight. It wasn’t a matter of if, only a question of when. 
During his sixth year, his mother made her intentions very clear. Walburga Black was adamant that he begin his search for a suitable bride. Leave it to his mother to compose a list of ladies she deemed suitable to become the future Mrs. Black. Regulus was to adhere to the carefully curated roster. They were names that he’d seen a million times before. Greengrass, Prewett, Rosier. Girls he’d grown up with and inadvertently had absolutely no interest in. 
Still, his mother was insistent so Regulus complied. He took the girls out on dates. The formula was rather simple: dinner at the fanciest restaurant in town followed by a walk around the city square in which he offered to buy his date a dessert like the proper gentleman his mother raised him to be. Despite the fact that Regulus had the entire process down to a science, the dates were always unsatisfactory. 
He was polite, of course. Opened the door, pulled out their chair, asked the appropriate level of questions to get to know his counterpart, but by the time the appetizers arrived, Regulus was on the verge of stabbing himself with the butter knife just to rouse himself from boredom. 
Regulus placed no blame on the girls. They were only doing what their families had raised them to do. Sit pretty, chew gracefully, agree with his opinions. All while wearing breakneck heels and a smile to boot. It was all terribly fucked up, but this was the world they lived in. 
The more he went on these dates, the more he realized that he didn’t want some pretty, docile wife. What he truly needed was someone who was willing to challenge him, to call him out on his bullshit, to argue with him when his own stubbornness prevented him from seeing reason. Regulus came to the horrible, earth-shattering realization that he probably wouldn’t find a woman like that on his mother’s list. 
As he walked back from another mind numbing date, Regulus grappled with this newfound dilemma. He didn’t want to endure another one of these disastrous dates. He didn’t want to sit through an entire meal making small talk. He definitely didn’t want to disappoint another girl by not kissing them at the end of the night. 
It wasn’t like any of them liked him anyways. Though they loved the idea of Regulus Black, he was quite certain that they wouldn’t afford the same affections to Reggie—the real and true version of himself. The one that Sirius often said Regulus kept in a neatly locked cage.
He wished he could be more like his brother. Sirius had always been the brave one. It was that infamous Gryffindor boldness that prompted his older brother to rebel against his family’s expectations. Instead of heeding to their mother’s ridiculous list, Sirius chose to date Remus in open defiance to Walburga’s orders. It resulted in him getting kicked out of 12 Grimmauld Place and burned off the family portrait, but Sirius didn’t seem to mind one bit.  
In a lot of ways, Regulus envied his brother. Sirius had the guts to stand up for himself. He wasn’t burdened by the crippling pressure of pleasing their mother. In all honesty, Reggie wondered if such a thing was even achievable. As he brooded, Regulus found himself on the shores of the Black Lake. His body had taken him here on autopilot. It was his only place of refuge in the castle. 
Regulus paced the rickety wooden dock. His mind was working so fast, so many thoughts spinning in his head, that it felt like he might work himself up to a fit. This has always been his problem. Sirius often said that he lived in his head too much. He frowned, trying and failing to get ahold of himself. For once, he wished he could just shut his brain off entirely.
Just then, Regulus felt a drop of water hit his head. He looked up and found dark, gray clouds hovering over the horizon. The stormcloud broke open and unleashed torrential rain all around him. Fucking fantastic. The world truly couldn’t give him a bloody break, could it? 
With a sigh, Regulus began making his way back. The ground was sodden underneath his feet, his boots sinking into the sand and dragging behind his black coat. The waves lapped violently across the shore as the wind lashed against the murky waters. Regulus was almost at the edge of the beach when he spotted you. 
A flash of movement from the corner of his eye. Regulus stopped dead in his tracks. There, at the mouth of the Black Lake, in the middle of the pouring rain, stood a girl with the most breathtaking smile he had ever seen. 
Regulus was fairly certain that you had History of Magic together. He sat behind you in class, passed by you in the halls, even reached for the same book in the forbidden section of the library once, but Reggie had never once seen that smile. The gravity of it threatened to knock the very breath from his lungs. 
There was something carefree about you. The way you spread your arms, tilted your head back, and laughed in the midst of the rain and thunder. Almost like you were welcoming the storm. 
It was only when your eyes locked that Regulus realized he was staring. You cocked your head at him, trailing your gaze from the curls plastered against his cheek to the nice button down and freshly pressed trousers that were now soaked from the rain, down to the shiny leather boots that were now digging into the sand. You seemed amused at the sight of him.
Ever the perfect gentleman, Regulus snapped out of his daze and jogged over to you. Without hesitation, he raised his coat over your head to shield you from the rain even though you were already both drenched. 
“What are you doing out in the rain?” Regulus asked, his voice full of genuine concern. “You’ll catch a cold.” 
You stepped out of the refuge of his expensive looking coat and held your hand out, catching droplets in your palm. “I don’t mind. I just…I just needed to feel the rain on my skin, that’s all.”
You supposed it must’ve seemed strange to him, but the rain always made you feel better. Lately, life had been just a little too overwhelming. There was so much pressure to do well in classes, to hang out with friends while balancing your clubs and sports, as well as making time to write back to your parents. When it all became a bit too much, you tended to come to the Black Lake for some sort of refuge. The rain was just an added bonus. 
If Regulus found your behavior bizarre, he didn’t say. Instead, he just smiled softly. “Well, you got your wish. It’s soaked out here.” 
“I know,” you responded with an enthusiastic nod. “It’s nice, isn’t it?” 
“Standing out in the pouring rain? On a beach where lightning can strike me down at any second? Yes, it’s absolutely splendid.”
Your mouth quirked in amusement. “No one’s telling you to stay out here.” You nodded towards the castle. “You’re more than welcome to take your brooding inside where it’s warm and dry. Not to mention, free of the dangers of lightning strikes, which are extremely rare by the way.” 
“With my luck, I might be the poor one in a million git who gets torched while getting insulted by a pretty girl.” 
“Did I insult you?’ you quipped back. “I hadn’t noticed.”
“You accused me of brooding.” 
“I didn’t accuse, I stated. Even the Wizengamot would have to rule that you were, in fact, brooding.” 
Regulus raised a brow. “What happened to innocent before proven guilty?” 
“Unfortunately, the evidence is overwhelming and the verdict is set. You, Regulus Black, have been sentenced for glaring at the Black Lake so menacingly that even the giant squid refuses to come to shore. Off to Azkaban you go.” 
“Do you promise to write me letters? Update me of how the world’s progressed without my dazzling presence?” 
“It would be my genuine pleasure.” 
Regulus chuckled at your dry humor. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d bantered like this with anyone, much less with a strange not-so-stranger. You sat down on the wet sand and patted the spot beside you with a grin.
“Why don’t you take a seat and tell me all about your troubles.” 
Beyond the bleak horizon, the spires of the castle peeked through the gray clouds. Regulus thought of the common room where his housemates would no doubt be gathered around the ornate fireplace for warmth. Knowing his friends, they’d probably be indulging in spiked hot chocolate and playing some childish drinking game. A few minutes ago, nothing appealed to him more, but now Regulus found himself choosing the violent rain and soggy sand. All because of you, his mystery girl.
You leaned back on your elbows and cocked your head at him. “What ails you, Mr. Black?” 
“That depends. How much do you bill per hour?” 
“Fortunately for you, I’m in a generous mood so I’ll throw in a free session. Consider it my pro-bono work.” 
“How kind of you,” Regulus said with a serious expression. “My brother’s been nagging me to see a mind healer for years. All that childhood trauma, you know.” 
A small smile tugged at your lips, revealing a set of dimples that he found rather charming. “I can’t tell if you’re being serious or not.” 
“My brother is Sirius. I’m Regulus, remember?” 
You snorted in a very unladylike manner, which only made Regulus grin. There was something so unapologetically you in your laugh that was absolutely endearing to him. Regulus smiled and knocked his shoulder against yours. 
You mimicked the action and smiled back at him. “All sarcasm aside, I was being genuine. If you want to talk about it, I’m here to listen.” 
"Do you often offer therapy sessions to complete strangers?"
"Only to surly Slytherins with sad eyes and pretty curls," you quipped back. "And we're not strangers. I sit behind you in potions. We're practically best mates."
"You think my curls are pretty?"
"Like a little cherub's. Are you quite sure you haven't escaped from the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel? You look like one of Michelangelo's angels. Except with way more scowling." Regulus grinned. He got the feeling that you always said whatever you wanted, whenever you wanted. It was refreshing. "There's a smile. See? Our session is already progressing."
"I think you might get more than you bargained for with me, I'm afraid."
You met the challenge in his words head on. "Try me."
“You were right. I’m definitely guilty of brooding.” 
“What happened?” 
Regulus hesitated for a moment. He had never been the type of person to be candid with his feelings, especially not with someone he barely knew. Usually, he just kept his thoughts to himself and ruminated on them in the privacy of his dorm until he drove himself mad by overthinking, but your presence brought him an unexplainable ease. For once in his life, Regulus chose not to question it. 
“I’ve had a long night,” he said, tucking his knees up to his chest. “I just got back from a date.” 
“It didn’t go well?” 
“It was…fine. It’s always fine. But it’s the same thing over and over again, just with a different girl.” 
“I wouldn’t have taken you for a playboy, Regulus Black.”
Regulus chuckled. “I’m not some unscrupulous rake, I assure you.” 
“Yes, that much is obvious from your use of the word unscrupulous.” You tucked your legs underneath you. “So why go on all of these dates if you find them so tedious?” 
“It’s my mother,” Regulus explained. “She has this list.” 
“A list?” 
“Yes, a list of girls that I’m to court. Noble, pureblooded, proper ladies of society that my mother has deemed worthy of marriage.” 
“You’re seventeen years old. Shouldn’t you be worrying about quidditch games and potions exams?” 
Regulus nodded. “Yes, one would think. But my family has always been different. Since my brother left, my parents have been obsessed with grooming me into becoming the perfect heir.” 
“How do you feel about that?” 
He sighed. “Stifled. Exhausted. Smothered. I can feel the weight of their expectations weighing me down every second of every day.” 
“I’m sorry, Regulus. That’s a terrible burden to carry.” 
Regulus shrugged. “Others have it worse.” 
“It doesn’t mean that your problem is any less heavy.” 
To Regulus, the acknowledgement felt oddly validating. Even though you knew nothing of his circumstance, there was wisdom in your words and you delivered it delicately, like you actually cared to hear his troubles. You were devoid of the judgment he'd grown accustomed to and he found that rather freeing.
“It’s just…sometimes I think that I’ll never be the perfect son. My brother, he’s always been the brave one. Classic Gryffindor,” he said with an eye roll. You chuckled, but stayed silent. It was obvious that Regulus had a myriad of thoughts to unpack tonight and you were more than happy to just listen. “Sirius has never cared what anyone thought about him, least of all our parents. I admire that about him, but I just don’t think I’m wired that way. I care too much.” 
“That’s not necessarily a bad thing,” you said softly. “Apathy is so common nowadays, finding someone who can admit that they care is refreshing. Though, I think it’s not without limits. You can’t please everyone. No matter what you do, someone is going to have something to complain about. You might as well be yourself.” 
“That’s exactly the problem,” Regulus pondered. “All of these girls on my mother's list, I think they like the idea of Regulus Black, but he’s an illusion. It isn’t the real me.” 
“Then who is the real you?” 
“I don’t know,” he said honestly. “I’m just Reggie. I like playing quidditch and reading depressing literature and memorizing obscure history facts. I hate messy rooms and orange juice and anything that crawls.”  
You smiled. “And what kind of girl does Reggie like?” 
“Someone witty. Someone funny. Someone who’ll argue with me. Someone who doesn’t just nod and agree with everything I say."
"So what you're saying is that you don't want a nice girl?"
Regulus shook his head. "No, I think I need someone who challenges me. Who sees me for who I am rather than what I represent. Don’t get me wrong, I’m sure the girls on my mother’s list are lovely, but I don’t think they’d actually like me if they knew who I really am.” 
“I don’t know, Reggie seems like a great guy. That Regulus bloke, on the other hand…” you scrunched your nose in disapproval. 
“Hey!” Regulus chided, “I’m pouring my heart out to you. That took a lot of courage, you know.” 
“You’re very brave, Reggie,” you said with a grin. “But you know what would be even braver?” 
Regulus squinted in the rain as you stood to your feet. Lightning crackled over the horizon, illuminating you with an ethereal silver glow. You held out your hand to him. “Come dance with me.” 
“Deathly afraid of being struck by lightning, remember?” 
“Sorry, what?” You asked as you shimmied around him. It wasn’t graceful by any means. It was the goofiest thing he’d ever seen and yet he’d never been so enthralled. You danced without a care in the world and it made him genuinely laugh. “I can’t hear you over all the fun I’m having.” 
"This is ridiculous," he said over the roaring thunder.
You shrugged. "Perhaps. But everyone's allowed to be a little ridiculous sometimes. Besides, I was asking Reggie not Regulus."
“Are you really trying to peer pressure me into dancing with you?” 
“That depends,” you replied with a cheeky smile. “Is it working?” 
Regulus conceded with a sigh and leapt to his feet. The youngest Black brother bowed like a proper gentleman. “May I have this dance, my lady?"
“You may, good sir.” 
You grinned up at him as he took you by the waist and waltzed with you across the sand. Surprisingly, Regulus let you take the lead. He chuckled when you stepped on his toes and laughed even harder when you tried to twirl him. Towering a good foot over you, Regulus had to fully crouch for the maneuver to work. 
Finally, you gave up the formality and just spun around in dizzying circles. There was absolutely no rhyme or rhythm to it. Just two idiots dancing in the rain with the biggest smiles on their faces. 
Your coordination, or lack thereof, caused you to almost faceplant into the sand. Regulus yelped as you took him down with you. By the time you recovered from the laughing fit, the two of you were red-faced, out of breath, and laying side by side along the shore. He turned over to you and brushed a stray strand of hair behind your ear. 
“That was the most fun I’ve had in years.” 
“See? There’s more to life than just being moody and melancholic.” 
“So this mystery girl of mine keeps reminding me,” Regulus said with a smile. “You never told me your name, by the way.” 
“Wow, you don’t even know my name? I’m offended, Reggie. We’ve only been in classes together since fifth year.” 
“I—we’ve never been introduced—” 
You broke out into a smile and giggled. You thought it was cute that Reggie was so easily flustered. “I’m just kidding, Reggie.” 
He sighed in relief as you stuck out your hand. “Y/N. My name is Y/N.” 
Regulus slipped his hand into yours. He cocked his head, studying your eyes and your smile and those cute little dimples. 
Y/N. The last name on his mother’s list. The one he saved for last because he didn’t know who she was. 
The French had a saying—le coup de foudre. The infamous phrase translated to a bolt of lightning or love at first sight. Regulus had long dismissed it as flowery prose, but thanks to his mystery girl, he started to think that maybe the Parisians were onto something because meeting you tonight felt preordained. A date with fate. Like a bolt of lightning streaking through his dark, endless skies.
“It’s nice to meet you, Y/N.” 
You grinned. “It’s nice to meet you, Reggie.” 
Regulus smiled and laced your fingers together. He was frozen, it was raining, and he was fairly certain that you were both probably going to catch a cold, but he didn’t care. In that moment, as he stared up at the sky, blinking back the rain, and intertwining his fingers with yours, Regulus had never felt more content. 
So no, Regulus did not believe in love at first sight, but love at second, third, and even fourth glance? He smiled a little as he gazed back at you, letting his gaze linger as he drank in that infectious laugh and sunny grin. 
You made him think that maybe, just maybe, a girl like you could convert a skeptic like him into a devout believer.
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icallhimjoey · 3 months ago
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now you’re allowed to write again, this is a formal request for the smut pls 🤝🏼😌
okay so, im bringing back bet!joe for you, because part of your brand is privately requesting specific smut, so our double or nothing boy's back with a new bet! (lil tw: it's.... it's right there, in the request, 18+) Wordcount: 2.4K
---
All The Aces
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part one - part two - part three - part four - part five
“You’re wrong.”
He was wrong.
“Am I?” Joe smirked before he threw his head back to catch a handful of popcorn into his mouth.
“Izzy, please tell him he’s wrong.”
He was so, so wrong.
The flake of popcorn he then threw over that got stuck in your hair went vocally ignored – you just fished it out and threw it back, watched how Joe was chewing an open mouthful of his own, smugly smiling at your bad aim.
That flake landed on the floor about two feet away from him. Izzy picked it up as she walked past, already annoyed with the two of you before she’d even sat down.
Him visibly enjoying her disdain wasn’t exactly helping his case.
“Don’t get me involved in whatever you two do to get each other off.” Izzy commented as she sat down next to you to which you audibly gasped.
You were pressed into the corner of your sofa with a little bowl of crisps balanced on the side – your own one, because neither Joe or Izzy wanted any crisps. They wanted popcorn, so they got to share the big bowl.
With your flatmate slash best friend next to you, your legs pretty much filled out the entire sofa, leaving Joe sit by himself in the armchair and thus placing Izzy in between the two of you, right in line of your crossfire.
“We don’t–” you started, but the dropped jaw you’d had on show for a second too long had prompted Joe to chuck a whole handful of popcorn at you.
None actually made it into your mouth.
“I genuinely don’t need to hear about what does or doesn’t get you off.” Izzy raised her voice slightly as she looked at Joe, telling him off for throwing food. He immediately stopped his laughter and apologised by handing the bowl over to her before he sat back, giving you the opportunity to pick and drop all thrown flakes back into the bowl.
“Just, just take it from me that he’s– you’re wrong.” you urged, and Joe just laughed.
Izzy shook her head as she took a deep breath in through flared nostrils.
Joe took that to mean more than just sheer annoyance at being dragged into whatever childish fight you had going.
“Izzy knows what’s up,” Joe held up a hand, ready to high five her, absolutely willing her refusal to get into this argument with you as an agreement to him being right.
Which, he very much wasn’t.
Izzy ignored him though, left him hanging like a loser, which made you chuckle.
“Will you just, hear me out? Did you hear what he said just now?” you sat up a little, legs crossing in front of you as you turned to Izzy who was now finding whatever she said she wanted to watch on the TV, remote in hand, eyes trained on the screen.
“She did hear me, which is why she won’t.” Joe simply said, leaning back in his chair all relaxed, hands behind his head, legs crossing at the ankles as he placed them on the coffee table.
“No, but, listen. Joe said–”
“I don’t care what Joe said,” Izzy deadpanned. “These lovers quarrels ain’t it. I know you live here so I can’t just kick you out, but…” Izzy’s eyes flicked to Joe, which made him scoff in mock-shock before he let his face turn kind.
Sarcastically kind.
 “No, she’s right. It’s okay. I’m wrong. I’m wrong. I’m just a man, and what do I really know, right? You know, besides the fact that you have like, a billion more nerve endings than we do, which arguably should mean I’m right, just by the science and biology of everything, but, fine. I’ll be wrong if that makes you feel better. I accept my defeat.”
As Joe finished his small monologue, you were both frowning at him - for different reasons.
You, because he was being a little shit.
Izzy, because she was slowly trying to puzzle together what the fuck he was on about.
She then slowly turned her head towards you, eyes squinted in thought, and you sighed as you looked at her. You pretended Joe wasn’t able to hear you when you said, “Maybe you should kick him out, I’m not–”
“It’s 8000.”  She interrupted you sort of casually.
“What?”
“If you’re talking about what I think you’re talking about, it’s 8000 nerve endings for you,” Izzy nodded at you, and then turned to Joe to nod at him, “And 4000 for you.”
Joe raised his eyebrows in slight surprise as he smiled, reaching for another hand of popcorn with one hand whilst pointing the other at you.
“See? Double! That’s double the pleasure!”
“What do you mean, see? Like that proves you’re right?”
“Are you forgetting that we’re talking about something I am witness to? You can’t make such wild claims when I literally know how you–”
“Oh, my God. Stop!”
Izzy rapidly turned her head a few times between the two of you, trying to follow along, before she muted the TV and sat back a little.
“All right, I’m too invested now. What the fuck is the problem…”
“She said women don’t care for orgasms.”
“That’s not what I said, you– No, Izzy,” you had to laugh at the vile facial expression she gave you. “That’s not what I said! I said that for me–”
“No, no no. You said for women.” Joe was quick to correct you, wagging a complacent finger at you.
“Sure, yes. Fine. For women, sex isn’t just about the orgasm at the end. Like, that’s not the most important thing. It’s not all about that.”
Izzy’s face dropped as she blinked slowly, and you saw how Joe was studying her face as he did his very best to keep his own laughter inside of his body.
“Don’t you agree there’s so many other things–”
“Shh shh,” Joe held up a hand, “Let her think.”
You obliged with an eye roll.
Joe was wrong.
“I don’t…” Izzy seemed at a fucking loss. What the fuck was this conversation she’d just accepted herself into? It was bad enough that these were sometimes the type of discussions held within your group of friends, wild accusations thrown over a table that you all got far too passionate about. It was a whole other thing to have two of those said friends now together, as a couple, having the debate in Izzy’s living room where the issue was wholly personal and, worst of all, inescapable.
She sighed as she squeezed her eyes shut for a moment and pinched the bridge of her nose with her fingers.
“Sex isn’t just about the orgasm, right?” you tried, speaking softly, praying she’d at least sort of agree with you. You knew she did, but didn’t know if she’s vocalise it in the moment because you also understood she thought you and Joe were being fucking ridiculous.
She just wanted to watch her favourite show on TV.
Have a quiet night in.
And yet, here you were.
Talking about if orgasms mattered or not.
“Oh, then what is it about?” Joe couldn’t help spatting out as he went for another handful of popcorn from the bowl Izzy had now placed on the table in front of him.
“Um,” you sat up more, now borderline sitting on your knees and nearly knocking off the small bowl of crisps behind you, holding both hands up, ready to count on your fingers.
“Foreplay, intimacy, being close, feeling connected–” you saw Joe slump back into his seat, pushing his chin up as he sarcastically nodded at you with squinted eyes and a deep frown.
It was stupid how that made you laugh whilst you also tried your best at raising your voice to make sure he was hearing what you were saying. To convey you weren’t lying. Which, you truly weren’t!
You continued, “Doing a fun activity together, it’s like quality time, isn’t it?” you tried, nudging Izzy, but not waiting for an answer as you quickly carried on with, “The attention, being appreciated– giving appreciation! Learning about each other! All of these things go both ways, Joe, there’s just… there’s so many things.”
You looked at him a second whilst he seemed to think it over. Just when his facial expression seemed to give way with a raised eyebrow and a small cock to the side of his head, you sternly demanded, “Admit you’re wrong.” which was exactly the wrong thing to say.
“I’ll admit those things are nice, sure.”
Joe threw back his handful of popcorn and wiped his hands, giving himself a moment to think of how he was going to phrase what he was about to say.
You and Izzy waited expectantly, both sets of eyes on Joe who seemed far too relaxed for a single guy sat opposite two women, making wild claims that he somehow would know more about sex from a woman’s perspective than they would.
He truly did believe that to be the case, though.
So wrong.
“But, if we’re not crossing the finish line, what’s the point?”
“Did you not listen to the whole list of things I just gave you?”
“I’m not wrong.”
“You absolutely are wrong.”
“I’m not only not wrong. I am also, right.”
Izzy, who had been quiet for a bit, stared into the space in front of her as she suddenly loudly scoffed.
“He’s wrong right?” you pushed just slightly, desperately needing your best friend to be on your side for this one.
“Listen,” Izzy started, holding up a hand. “I’ve…” she faltered, and you made eye contact with Joe, a little panicked, a little confused.
What if she was going to tell you that you were wrong?
Oh no.
Best friend betrayal.
If Izzy disagreed with you, she could be an adult about it and pretend, just for the sake of it, that you were right and then tell you about her real feelings later, outside of Joe’s earshot.
Bros before hoes and all that.
“The finish line is important…”
Yes.
You smiled as smugly as you could and saw Joe’s slowly fade.
Izzy was a bro.
Yes.
You could just feel how she was about to side with you on this before she’d even said the words.
“But if it’s between all that she said and just, as you put it, crossing the finish line... she wins. She’s right.”
There.
End of discussion.
You didn’t cheer, or high five your best friend, or point at Joe to shriek at him that he was an idiot. You just accepted Izzy’s answer and gave a small shrug that quietly said, “See?”
Izzy reached for the remote she’d put down, unmuted the TV, and Joe watched as the two of you got comfortable on the sofa together. How you sat back and reached for snacks and laid the throw blankets across your laps just right.
It was a little suspicious how long he stayed quiet, but you knew it would only be a moment for him to try and argue his case once more.
There was no point, you knew, but you also knew Joe had an ego that was fragile, like all men had egos that were fragile.
Male egos couldn’t just take hits like this one, even if he was outnumbered.
You were chewing on a crisp when, from the corner of your eye, you saw Joe’s finger wag from left to right, pointing at the two of you before he spoke.
“You can’t actually be serious…”
“Oh yea.” Izzy didn’t even look at him as she answered, and it was hard to hide your smile. “So serious.”
“So, you’re saying…” Joe sat up, both elbows on his knees, whilst neither of you moved. “You’d rather have sex and not come–”
“Half the time, that’s just life,” Izzy complained, and you both laughed.
Joe didn’t.
Your moment of haha-men-suck that had its feet stuck in truths had you laughing louder when you saw how Joe definitely wasn’t in on the joke.
When Izzy saw, she snapped her head towards you and stage whispered, “Uh oh…” through her giggles.
Joe scooted forward even further and doubled down, “You would rather have sex and not orgasm, than have an orgasm? Is that what you are saying?”
He needed to hear you say it.
“Joe… please accept that you’re wrong and let it rest.” You were very much trying to be the bigger person, which was easy when your friend had just helped you win the argument.
But then Izzy grabbed hold of your arm as she looked at your boyfriend.
“Careful...” she warned alarmingly. “I’ve seen that face before.”
“Tell me you mean that. What I just said. Say that you would rather have sex without an orgasm than one with one...” Joe ignored Izzy, dark eyes locked right onto yours, facial expression made of stone.
“No, that’s not...” you sighed, looked at Izzy, said, “He doesn’t get it.”
“He doesn’t get it.” Izzy echoed.
You were still making fun, unable to stop your giggles.
“Say what you mean, then.” Joe was still leant forward, was still staring you down, all serious and urgent.
“Can we just watch TV now, please?” Izzy interupted, increasing the volume of the TV slightly.
Joe didn’t falter in this weird staring contest he’d started, one you weren’t participating in.
You looked down at your bowl of crisps as you fished out another one.
You bit it in half and saw how Joe grew a little impatient as his eyes followed your hand as you fed yourself.
Then, you finally answered, “Sex isn’t about the orgasm.” And Joe immediately clapped his hands together loudly, making both you and Izzy jump slightly. He seemed incredibly pleased as he sat back in the armchair, rubbing his hands together before he pointed a quick finger at you.
“I’m going to prove you wrong.”
A startled laugh escaped you as you and Izzy shared a look.
“All right, good luck mate.”
This time, it was Joe’s turn to scoff, and that smug little smile from before made its return.
“Won’t need it. You just wait.”
You looked at each other for a moment, and you didn’t trust his confident bearing one bit, but were too stubborn to let your own satisfied smile fade.
“Fine.” you said challengingly.
Joe was wrong.
“Fine.” Joe copied.
So wrong.
---
The Taglisted
@alwayslindie, @babybluebex, @capricornrisingsstuff, @chaoticgood-munson, @demonsanddemogorgons
@djoseph-quinn, @dolcevit4, @eddies-puppet, @emma-munson, @emotionaldreamer
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@hazelenys, @imjustjen14, @jewellethief, @joesquinns, @keikoraven
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@sweetberry47, @take-everything-you-can, @thebellenouvelle, @tlclick73, @werepartnersnow
@witchwolflea, @yunirgo
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huhmiya · 1 month ago
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MULLET | nick sturniolo
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pairing: bsf!nick x f!reader
summary: nick needed a haircut but he was impatient and decided to cut it himself, though when you noticed, you offered to help, even though you weren't a professional hairdresser.
warning: fluff (??), stress, use of y/n
a/n: not my photos, on pinterest. no joke but this happened to me before, my friend cut his hair so I had to give him a buzz cut because there was no saving it
WORDS: 1.0k
huhmiya on wattpad
you - pink | nick- purple
-
Not long ago, Nick called you in a panic, his voice filled with distress. He said he looked like a failed science experiment, making it difficult for you to understand what he was saying.
Despite thinking he might be overreacting, you agreed to help to whatever he was asking. However, upon arriving, you were still confused about what was going on.
Nick greeted you at the door with his hood up, avoiding eye contact. His demeanour only added to your bewilderment.
As you followed him upstairs to the lounge, he finally confided in you. "Y/n, I've made a massive mistake," Nick admitted as you took off your shoes.
"What have you done?" you asked, meeting his troubled gaze.
With his brothers in their room, unaware of your presence, Nick led you to the bathroom and locked the door so they couldn't come in.
Upon seeing hair scattered around the sink, you raised an eyebrow, studying the mess before turning your attention to Nick.
He pulled back his hood, revealing the haircut he had given himself, which was absolutely terrible. "Oh, shit," you whispered to yourself.
He shot you a glare and ran his hand through his hair, but some pieces of hair he had cut were still stuck in his hair and ended up on his hand.
"Nick... how did this even happen?" you whispered as he let out a frustrated sigh and replied, not too loudly.
"The hairstylist wasn't available for two weeks. I couldn't walk around looking like I had a bird's nest on my head for that long," he said, his eyes on you as he wiped away a tear of frustration.
You gazed at his hair, fighting the urge to laugh. It wasn't the right moment for that.
"Why don't you wash your hair to get rid of the cut pieces and then I can help you fix it properly?" you suggested quietly, making sure he could hear you.
He glares at you for a moment before grabbing the shower head, as you both stand in the bathroom.
You were cleaning hair from the sink, flushing it down the toilet, while Nick leaned over the bathtub to wash his hair.
"You know, you look like such an idiot with your haircutting skills," you tease, a slight smirk playing on your lips. In response, he sprays water at you, then back at his own hair.
Your eyes widen as the lukewarm water soaks into your clothes, feeling colder than expected. He chuckles slightly at his own antics before continuing to wash his hair.
There is a moment of silence as you sit on the counter, and he stands, annoyed at the sight of his hair falling out with the water.
After he finishes, he dries his hair with a towel, clearly frustrated with himself.
He looks at you and says, "I might as well shave my fucking head like I used to, I don't think we can fix this shit haircut." He gestures towards his hair in exasperation.
Even though his hair was wet, you were contemplating how to fix it, but he had already trimmed the sides and snipped randomly around the top of his head.
"Let me give it a shot first, maybe you can pull off a mullet?" you suggest, not fully confident in your skills as a hairstylist, but willing to give it a go.
"You can't even cut a straight line on paper, let alone my hair," he quips, causing you to roll your eyes. "I bet I can do a better job than you," you counter.
He gives you a defiant look and gestures with his hand before handing you the scissors.
You sit on the counter while he stands next to you, leaning in slightly so you can reach his hair more easily.
As you examine his hair, you try to stifle a laugh at how messy it is, especially with it being wet, which only seems to make it worse.
You begin cutting his hair, unsure of where to start, but determined to make some progress despite the initial mess.
"I'm going to record a YouTube video with a bald look. What should I say about it? Oh, I'm back as Eleven?" he says with attitude as you continue cutting his hair into a mullet.
"Nick, maybe trust me on this?" you say, making him stay silent, still annoyed by his actions.
You stay quiet while drying his hair, then grab the shaver and continue working on the sides, piquing his curiosity and prompting him to ask what you're trying to achieve.
"The only real option is a mullet," you say, causing him to raise an eyebrow. "Are you kidding me?" he mutters.
You hum in agreement and turn him around so he's facing you as you continue. "I don't know if I should thank you or not," he says quietly.
You just smile at him before resuming the cutting. Eventually, you finish his hair, and he looks in the mirror.
It definitely looks better than before, but you're not a professional hairstylist, so while your cutting skills are good, you're just unsure about styling it.
He simply smiled and gave you a small hug before tousling your hair a bit to style it into a mullet.
"You did resemble a failed science experiment earlier," you jest, causing him to glance at you in the mirror before playfully tapping the back of your head, though not forcefully.
"I might just trim your hair while you're sleeping and see who ends up looking like the failed science experiment with my haircutting skills," he teases with a smirk.
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ladykailitha · 1 month ago
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A Love Connection Part 2
Hey guys! Did you miss me? LOL!
Just a heads up this chapter is a little angsty because we have get Steve desperate enough to try going on a game show. But have no fear, it doesn't last long.
Also in this Susan Mayfield never marries Neil Hargrove, but she moves to Hawkins because her job moved her there. So Billy and Max aren't step-siblings.
Part 1
~
Steve nearly had a panic attack right there in the car when Chrissy screamed. There wasn’t a crisis. Or at least not one that needed immediate attention. What it was, was their little drunk text about #needsmoregays at A Love Connection went viral. There were actual fucking news articles. Yeah, the first was from Pink News, but the rest? Actual fucking trades. Variety, Dateline, even The Hollywood Reporter, for fuck’s sake.
Steve was going to pass out, but he managed to get them to the school safely. Thankfully there was nothing on Chrissy profile that was her real name or where she worked. She had a work Twitter for that. And that one was only on her computer at work. She was very careful not to cross the two. So there weren’t any news people out front of the school. But her DMs were filled with requests for comments or even actual interviews.
He decided she could do whatever the hell she wanted, he wasn’t going to get involved in this. She’s the one that drunk tweeted. Yeah, it was because of something he said when he was also drunk. But still!
He also decided ignore Chrissy and Robin at lunch, choosing instead to have it in his classroom to avoid them. Because, yes, he was avoiding them thank you. He just wanted to see gay people have love, too. Last Saturday was a disaster and he wanted proof that gays like he could find love.
Luckily, it was only a nine day wonder and Chrissy’s inbox went back to normal. Or as about as normal as one can get after have a tweet go viral.
They were cruising through the school year, same as always. There were always the super smart kids and the ones that didn’t care about history. So Steve always tried to make it as fun as possible.
Gladiator days where they wrestled stuff animals. Letting the kids stab him in March. Building their own mini pyramids. His hallpass was a gladius for extra fun.
They were gearing up the for Olympic games just before Christmas when Mrs. Byers, the principal pulled him out of his class.
“Hey, Steve,” she said warmly, “you’re not in trouble.”
Steve looked over his shoulder at his class before looking back at her. “Okay...”
She smiled up at him sweetly. “I was wondering if you’d be willing to watch the AV club today after school? Mr. Jenner went home because he’s puking his guts out. Normally I would just cancel, but a couple of the kids are in the club because their parents can’t pick them up until after seven.”
He let out a long sigh. He was going to go home and get ready to go try a new bar Chrissy had found. But now, by the time he got home, showered, and ate it would be too late to go out.
“Yeah, sure, Mrs. Byers,” he said.
“Thank you so much, Steve,” Mrs. Byers said. “Mr. Jenner will be so grateful too.”
Steve nodded and then waited until she walked away to roll his eyes. Nate Jenner’s alcohol problem was the worst kept secret in the school. Even students were aware that there were times he taught drunk. Most kids didn’t know why he would be slurring his words or conked out on his desk; only that they were his ‘bad days’. But the kids who did know? They tended to shield the other kids from the worst of it.
The problem was that Mr. Jenner was two years from retirement and they didn’t want to make him lose his pension. Which Steve thought that he absolutely should. That old coot had no business teaching students like that.
He went back to teaching his class, wondering who they got to cover Mr. Jenner’s classes. He finally got through to the last class and went to the science ‘wing’ of the school. He walked up to Mr. Jenner’s class room and there was Robin coming out of it.
“Now that’s just unfair,” he moaned. “If you were watching his classes, why couldn’t you watch the AV club?”
Robin patted him on the shoulder. “Because I played the dumb blonde routine until Mrs. Byers gave up.” She waved at him as she walked away.
With a sigh, Steve went into the room and began getting out the equipment that they would need. He didn’t know much about radios and shit, but he did know what they did and didn’t need.
He had just gotten set up when the first of the kids arrived.
He wasn’t surprised to see Will come in first. With his mom as principal, all of the teachers tended to tiptoe around him as to not have any ‘misdeeds’ taken back to her, so his last class never went over. Ever.
The next couple of kids to file in were Dustin Henderson and Lucas Sinclair. They both had Robin’s Spanish class last period, so it was no surprise to see them together.
“Sinclair!” Steve said, fist bumping the kid. “What are you doing with these nerds?” He was only joking and they all knew that. Lucas had been friends with Will, Dustin, and their other friend Mike since Dustin moved in in the second grade. Lucas loved history and was one of Steve’s brightest students so he liked to pick on him for his choice of friends.
“Sorry, Coach,” Lucas said with a grin, “if I wasn’t around they’d fall into an uncovered manhole or something.”
Steve gave Dustin their secret handshake, complete with death and everything to make up for the nerd comment. But Dustin and Will took it all in stride. They were used to the teasing.
A couple other kids came in. One spotted Steve and immediately walked back out.
“Some people just aren’t made for fun,” he lamented to the kid’s retreating back. “I’m just too cool for some people’s children. It’s not my fault.”
They all chuckled and then finally the last member of the AV club arrived. Mike Wheeler.
He sighed when he saw Steve, but didn’t turn around. He threw his backpack on the nearest desk and slumped into the chair with a heavy sigh. “Why can’t we get a teaching advisor who isn’t such a flake!”
Steve wiped his brow internally. Mike didn’t like him all the time, so the fact that he was complaining about Mr. Jenner not being there rather than Steve taking his place was a relief, honestly. It meant he wouldn’t be grumpy the whole time.
“All right everyone,” Steve said, clapping his hands together. “Dustin is in charge, Will will take notes for next time. Let’s go!”
The club went as well as could be expected considering Steve really didn’t have any idea of how all this stuff worked.
After class while Steve was waiting on the curb with the ‘Party’ as they called themselves, waiting for their parents to pick them up texting Robin and Chrissy.
“Coach...” Lucas asked, “did we ruin your plans?”
Steve felt a stab in his chest as his head shot up to look the kid in the eye. He looked down at his phone where there were dozens of messages bitching Robin out for leaving him with the AV club because she had a girlfriend and Steve didn’t even have that. Or boyfriend, which was his preference. He had dated women in the past but he liked men more. Or rather liked men full stop. That was certainly a revelation and a half.
He put his phone away with a sigh. “No, Lucas you didn’t. It was due to the irresponsible behavior of Mr. Jenner. He’s the one to blame. I was just a little annoyed at Miss Buckley because she knows this stuff better than I do, but got out of it under false pretenses.” His eyes cut to Will. “Don’t tell your mom I just said that. I don’t want Miss Buckley in trouble.”
Will held up his hands in surrender. Steve nodded.
“I love history and sports and swimming,” he began, he held up his hand to stall whatever words were going to come out that kid’s mouth. “For fun, Dustin. I like swimming for fun, which is why I didn’t include it in sports.”
Dustin huffed and crossed his arms over his chest with a pout.
“I like going out with friends and meeting new people,” Steve finished, “and of course I love teaching you kids. But I look around me and I just see someone who’s stagnated before he’s even thirty.” He sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. “I don’t know why I’m telling a bunch of teenagers this. Sorry.”
Will put his hand in Steve’s. “You’ll find someone. If my mom can find someone at her age, you can find someone, too.”
Steve gave his hand a squeeze and didn’t point out that Mrs. Byers, Joyce had already had two kids and had been divorced by the time she was thirty so it really didn’t count.
Mike’s mom Karen arrived first. Mike just waved goodbye and slipped into the passenger side of her car.
Steve shook his head. Mike was trying to learn how to balance friends and liking girls and after school activities. He’d get there.
Dustin’s mom and Will’s older brother Jonathan arrived at the same time. Jonathan was Steve’s age, but Will have been born over a decade after him as a last ditch attempt to save his parents’ marriage.
Steve waved goodbye to them and then it was just Steve and Lucas.
“My mom always told me,” Lucas said softly, “that there might not be one person out there for everyone, but there is the right person out there for what you need right now. I think she was trying to explain why Mrs. Byers had two husbands, but I think it works for you, too. You’ll find you right person at the right time.”
Steve blinked down at this boy, barely thirteen. He rubbed the top of Lucas’s head. “Thanks, kid.”
Just then his dad pulled up. “Go on,” Steve murmured. “I’ll see you after the break.”
Lucas re-shouldered his backpack to just the one shoulder. He paused as if he wanted to say something else, he just shook his head.
“See you later, Coach!”
He got into his into dad’s car and immediately started talking to him about school excitedly.
Steve pulled his coat tighter around him. He wanted to be that dad, but as time wore on it was looking less and less likely. He went back inside to clean up and grab his stuff. He had a pile of assignments he had to grade. He never gave homework and never did tests. Both were pointless in his opinion, plus it meant that he less stuff to mark and grade. He based his grades off participation and being able to stay on task.
He walked through the darkened halls and felt the weight of it on his shoulders. His best friend and her girlfriend were out having the time of their lives, while he was alone in more ways than one.
He didn’t even Garfield to keep him company anymore. Yeah, he was just a stupid goldfish, but he was Steve’s.
The cold seeped into his bones and buried into his heart. He was even going to be alone for Christmas. Chrissy was taking Robin to her brother’s for the holiday. They felt bad because they both knew Steve’s parents had cut him off long ago and didn’t have anywhere else to go.
But he had encouraged Robin going. Meeting her girlfriend’s family was important. And with Chrissy and her brother, Peter both being estranged from their parents it was even more important than usual. They promised they would be back for New Year’s and Steve promised he would be fine.
He stepped onto the curb and stopped, tilting his head back, eyes closed as he fought back tears. When the first snowflake landed it made him flinch at the sudden extra coldness to his cheek. That one was followed by another and another. It was hell.
He opened his eyes and let the snow melt on his lashes, the cold mingling with his hot tears.
~
Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8
Tag List: SEVEN SLOTS OPEN
1-@mira-jadeamethyst @rozzieroos @itsall-taken @redfreckledwolf @zerokrox-blog
2- @gregre369 ​@a-little-unsteddie @chaosgremlinmunson @messrs-weasley @cryptid-system
3- @maya-custodios-dionach @goodolefashionedloverboi @val-from-lawrence @carlyv @wonderland-girl143-blog
4- @justforthedead89 @irregular-child @bookbinderbitch @bookworm0690 @forgottenkanji
5- @anne-bennett-cosplayer @yikes-a-bee @awkwardgravity1 @littlewildflowerkitten @genderless-spoon
6- @dragonmama76 @ellietheasexylibrarian @thedragonsaunt @useless-nb-bisexual @disrespectedgoatman
7- @counting-dollars-counting-stars @tinyplanet95 @ravenfrog @swimmingbirdrunningrock @lingeringmirth
8- @gutterflower77 @a-lovely-craziness @just-a-tiny-void @w1ll0wtr33 @beelze-the-bubkiss
9- 9- @dreamercec @wheneverfeasible @garden-of-gay
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l4long-winded · 14 days ago
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l4l presents... kinktober day seventeen
today's act: deepthroating, starring carmen berzatto
admonitions: fem!reader, hair pulling, needy!carmy, facefucking.
word count: 758
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carmen’s fingers tangle into your hair, alternating between clutching your scalp for support and curling his digits to grip the strands into his tightening fist. he’s normally kinder to you, softer with you, treating you like a fucking angel (unless you ask otherwise since he also knows when being rough is necessary), but that’s all to his own volition. he can barely control himself, swallowing the gathering spit in his mouth, his adam’s apple bobbing in his neck while he inhales and exhales shakily. his eyes shut despite himself, his lips parted, noises he can not suppress for the life of him. grunts, groans, fucking whines he swears aren’t him, blooming a deepening rosy shade from the embarrassment of it, and from what the fuck you’re doing to him and his body.
he wills himself to glance down, finds the strength from within to crane his neck, and as his mind told him while he pushed his head back into the pillow underneath, he’s met with the vision that could bring any sane man to the brink of absolute madness. he quickly draws his gaze to your stretched lips down his shaft, close to gliding down to the base of him, the remaining inches of him glistening with your saliva. they drag upwards, and that’s when he feels your tongue snaking along the underside of his cock, draping until you get to the tip, flattening it to flick over his slit and then round the swollen head. sparks of electricity ignite from his crotch up his torso, up his spine to his brain, all from you sucking his cockhead, swirling your talented tongue over him.
feeling his eyes on you, you flicker yours up at him, staring at him through long lashes. it exacerbates his experience through enhancing it at the same exact time, holding eye contact, slurping before you descend your head downwards, moaning through a mouthful of cock. it vibrates deliciously, stroking a sensitive portion of him, but he can hardly think or dwell on it, moaning whenever you’re back to taking him in deeply, beginning to bob your head all over again as you had moments ago before you gave him time for a reprieve. and just like earlier, he yanks on your hair, unable to help himself, thinking with his dick, something that can’t be human ripping from the back of his throat as his tip hits the back of yours. where the fuck did you learn that?
“fuck me, fuck, k-keep doing that and i’m gonna cum down your throat, baby…”
it’s not a threat as much as he would like it to be. even though he’s the one beginning to thrust his hips up for more, seeking the hilt of your throat and the addicting outline of himself he makes out each time, you’re both aware of how he’s not in actual control. he bucks upwards, strikes shiny tears that almost spill over your lash line, barely able to breathe when you gag and the walls of your throat grasp him tighter like another favorite area of his on your body so often does, but you’re the one orchestrating all of this. you’re the one who started deepthroating him, testing your limits, testing his in the process, so he feels gratified, lost in pure bliss, fucking your mouth like you want him to do, content with being your lab rat if this is the science you’re into.
carmen enters a different stratosphere with a final thrust into your mouth, his palm holding your head to him before you get any bright ideas and continue to bob on him when he’s seeing stars on the ceiling and hearing the flutter of angel wings in the distance. he pants heavily, gushes of his cum pulsing down your throat. he’s so deep that you barely taste it, a fact you whine over, pleading eyes glancing up at him. how dare you give him that look right now? asking for mercy with your pretty irises whenever you didn’t show him an ounce of it during this endeavor?
he’s a sucker for you in every sense. although his blood is running hotter than it should be, he releases your head. he instantly whimpers as you lift your head, throwing an arm over his eyes as you tongue his sensitive tip. he twitches when you suck, cursing you, himself, the heavens, and the pits of hell’s flames he’s certain are licking his body. or maybe that’s you. it’s not like he can tell up from down right now.
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dufferpuffer · 2 months ago
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Just read your post about Tonks. Tonks surely was a student of Snape's. Just imagine. Tonks. In Potions. With Snape. Tonks, canonically the clumsiest character of the entire series. Potions. The SUBTLE science and EXACT art of potion-making. NO foolish wand-waving or silly incantations. Tonks is not subtle and exact. Tonks is foolish and silly. And that, to Snape, is INFURIATING. However, Tonks is an Auror. This means Tonks succeeded in getting an Outstanding O.W.L in Potions. This means Tonks took Potions N.E.W.T. This means Snape was probably hoping and praying he would never see her face again after her 5th year but SURPRISE. The girl is SMART and Snape is, unfortunately for him, a fair grader (yes he is idc what people say). I want to see this. I want to see Tonks being an absolute clumsy mess in Potions and Snape being livid but at the same time frustrated because he knows she has potential but she's just not careful and she's witty and talks back and he can't just truly hate her. THIS brings me to the scene in HBP where Tonks brings Harry to the gates after he got knocked out by Malfoy on the train. She sends a Patronous inside the school to get the gates opened. Snape comes and tells her that he noticed her Patronus had changed (now a wolf so cute omg). Therefore, Snape remembers her Patronus from before, but it's like he catches himself and makes a sly remark about her new Patronus being weak because it's a wolf. Like a father disapproving of his daughter's choices for falling in love with a mangy werewolf (love you Remus). Idk I loved that scene because it hints that they have a bit more history together than we think. It could also just be from both being part of the order, but I feel there is a bit more. What do you think dear tumblr friend?
I think she and Snape were buddies. As much 'buddies' as Snape can manage with a student, anyway.
There is a reason Tonks stomachs Moody so well - and its because she's had A LOT of practice with grumpy hard asses. She takes biting comments well, she isn't ever afraid to dish humor back, she knows well when to take things seriously and when to help lighten the mood - handy for people who can't relax easily.
She trained those teeth on Snape, I guarantee it. She LIKES bastards. She enjoys making people happy, she enjoys exceeding expectations, she likes proving herself reliable - and bastards are the hardest to please. She doesn't see blemishes or ugliness or scars - just the person. She likes making them smile.
She's clumsy. She's a disaster. He can't ignore her no matter how much he might want to sometimes - because she might die... ...and yet, her skill is obvious. She pulls through when she needs to. I like to think Potions might have been one of her worst subjects - but she worked hard at it, and enjoyed it, and asked questions.
Not just "Did I chop the Mudwort root thin enough, Sir?" But "Ey, Prof - if this potion utilities the healing properties within the cells of the root, shouldn't we be grinding it rather than slicing it...?" You know. She's actually invested, deeply learning about the topic, willing to experiment. Making him answer with thought. "...No, breaking the cell wall makes it burn away too quickly. We slice thinly to ensure good, even absorption."
And then her cauldron explodes later anyway because she accidentally tipped some leaves in with the slices. Oops. BUT... she will stay behind to fix it. She will ask to practice when she has free time. She isn't talented, nor careful - but its hard not to appreciate her enthusiasm and her dedication to success. He spent a lot of time with her. Being able to mark her a genuine "O" in her NEWTs was one of his proudest moments as a teacher.
Perhaps it's part of why Hermione annoys him so much, too - she appeared like an interested student on the surface, having read her books... but she never stepped the fuck up. She never tried. She never pushed it. She never used her brain. An insufferable know-it-all is ONLY better than a complete dunderhead in that they're safer to have in the classroom. But she doesn't encourage other students learning, she doesn't push herself, she doesn't actually care about the topic... just getting everything right, to prove she is smart or whatever.
Same with Neville: A clumsy oaf that seems to do nothing at all to mitigate that fact. barely even stays behind to clean his own messes. They say Longbottom is 'frightened of him' - well he isn't there to coddle him. He never needed to coddle Tonks. She took his bite as a challenge to do better and soared because of it. She was an oafish moron... but a rare gem.
...And then she started dating FUCKING LUPIN The first thing he said when she was so obviously showing interest it made him feel ill was "...You know he is a werewolf, yes?" And when she responded "Yeah, duh - what of it?" He groaned "Of course... you've never had any common sense..." And the look he snapped at her when she cheekily said "...Gave you hell at school, too - didn't he?"
Tonks teased him. Of course she did. There were days when he walked into class to see she had turned into a foolish version of him... But she knew how to hold back. She is a highly empathetic woman. Even when she was young... the few times she sensed perhaps she went too far: She was mature enough to apologize. Sensitive enough to realize he would not want such apology in front of others, either - and wait till after class to hang her head. It was difficult to stay mad at her. She was just too damn earnest.
In many ways: She reminded him of Lily. Firey, obsessed with magic, popular, friendly - brightened up every room she entered. Seemingly cared about everyone. Even him. It was just... pleasant. Familiar. She was a very different person, of course - but interacting with her felt a little like home. Perhaps a few times a little piece of him slipped out to her - something more juvenile and playful than he has been for years.
...That's what I think, tumblr friend B^) I think its a good thing they didn't find out eachother had died. They would have been distraught for eachother.
But if they both lived...? I think she could have been the thing that healed Snape and Lupins relationship. They both care for her - and can at least be civil with eachother for her sake.
Imagine: post-war family BBQ's with Snape and Lupin arguing over how to cook. Lupin wants to prove himself handy but Snape knows he's fucking useless. (Tonks is the true BBQ dad.) Snape babysitting Teddy. He'd be such a good uncle.
EDIT: Remus and Tonks were BOTH awful at potions. Tonks at least became competent through sheer effort - but they still both go to beg him for help when they need anything. I think Lupin/Tonks/Snape would be fun :^)
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ghouly-boiiiii · 6 months ago
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THE GHOUL: WHY HE'S HOT - (A SCIENCE!)
࣪⊹°˖✧ Welcome to a Powerpoint Presentation by Some Ghoul-Loving Freak ✧˖° ⊹
Why is The Ghoul hot? I think many of us who find ourselves swooning over this necrotic, murdering cowboy have been asking ourselves that very question lately. Is there something wrong with me? Do I need therapy? Will my friends ever look at me the same way again? Well my fellow ghoul lovers, you are not alone. And I am here to explain to you the exact reasons why this gun-slingin’, ass bitin’ baked potato with teeth has captured the hearts of so many... with science! (sort of) 🤠
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------(Spoiler warning... lots and lots of spoilers below the cut!)------
1. Walton Goggins… just Walton Goggins
I think we can all agree that the man behind the makeup and prosthetics is a large reason as to what makes The Ghoul so attractive. Walton himself is a very nice looking fellow, and he absolutely oozes charisma, both on the set and off. And for some reason decided to amp that up to 100 while playing The Ghoul. He managed to make Ghouly Boi likable and endearing, even when he's doing murdery things. So yeah, the dude's mad talented.
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"Strong enough to keep out the rads... and the reds." - Cooper Howard shooting a Vault-Tec commercial in episode 6.
2. The makeup artists knew what they were doing
Attempting to make The Ghoul “kind of hot” was absolutely intentional. There was serious discussion behind the scenes about how they could make The Ghoul attractive to viewers, despite him being… well… a ghoul. (So yeah, it is 100% the creators fault. They did this to us on purpose!) When creating The Ghoul’s design, they deliberately ghoulified features that weren’t that important for attraction and left the rest alone, or made them more accentuated.
For example, when it comes to the attractiveness of a male, specifically in the face, most people focus in on the eyes, lips, jaw and cheekbones, which they emphasized and brought out with the makeup. Things like the nose, hair and even skin can be safely tinkered with, and even with those they went pretty easy on. Many ghouls have cloudy or discolored eyes, but not Ghouly. (in fact, bro’s still got his eyelashes, lol) They also kept his ears, despite most ghouls’ tending to fall off just like the nose. His teeth are still intact, despite being rather discolored. And they even made his skin relatively smooth compared to most ghouls. (I’m willing to bet he gets made fun of in a lot of ghoul circles for being such a baby smooth smoothskin)
If the creators had made him any uglier - messed up his eyes, took away the ears, rotted out some teeth, or made his skin a lot more torn up - we might not be here right now. But the character designers and makeup artists were very intentional in his appearance, making him look rotten enough to be recognized as a ghoul, but not so nasty he’d be hard to look at. By keeping and even accentuating Walton’s eyes and bone structure, while giving the ghoulishness to other features, they managed to balance out the ‘yuk’ with the ‘hmmm… wait what?’ just right.
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"Sometimes a fella's gotta eat a fella." - The Ghoul to Lucy while munchin' on Roger in episode 4.
3. His charisma, charm and sense of humor
Look, Ghouly is charming as FUCK, okay? There’s no getting around it, so let’s just get that out of the way right now. He exudes confidence and beats you in the face with his overwhelming swag. He also has these… looks. Which I can only describe as “sexy” looks. I’m not really sure how to explain, but if you’re reading this, you probably know what I mean.
As mentioned before, a lot of this is just Goggins being Goggins, but the writing is brilliant as well. He definitely embodies that sort of hot badboy/outlaw/pirate sort of archetype that is often found in romantic settings/stories, so yeah. And also, who doesn't love a man with a great sense of humor? He's got all the best lines in the show and is just a joy to watch, even if it's just for the funny. Really, whoever wrote for Ghouly was a comedic genius, a gentleman, and a scholar. They should be commended.
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"I'd offer you one a' these cherreh tomaydas, but you got a hole on yo neck." - The Ghoul to some guy he just shot in episode 2.
4. He loves dogs
Okay, so yes, we all know he stabs Dogmeat in order to keep her from ripping his face off, which ALMOST ruined his character for me, but then he brought her back with a Stimpak and all was forgiven. I’m willing to bet he probably also tried to stab her in a place that he knew wouldn’t be fatal, and also his choice to stab instead when he could have easily just shot her, letting her get right up on top of him before doing anything to defend himself, shows his hesitation in harming a dog.
It’s clear that Coop has a lot of affection for dogs, especially when we see the flashbacks of him with his OG dog and how pissed he gets about not being able to bring him into the vaults. The way he handles Dogmeat with such loving care, and smiles with genuine joy as she leaps up off the table was one of the first moments to show that, underneath that hardened exterior, he’s still got a soft, squishy, gooey center (other than the rotting flesh, I mean).
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"Who decided that there were no dogs in the vault?" - Cooper to his wife upon finding out their dog Roosevelt wouldn't be able to go to the vault with them in episode 6.
5. He's a genuinely good person, deep down...
Not only does he save the dog (twice), but Ghouly also did other things that were surprisingly unselfish and not awful. Does that make up for the bad shit he did? Well, no. But again, it shows that he’s at least not ALL bad, and that the man he use to be is still in there somewhere.
For example, he could have easily ratted out Lucy for busting up the Super Duper Mart, but he took the heat for it instead. And despite the fact that he shoots (and eats) Roger, he does seem to have genuine empathy for the turning ghoul. So his choice to kill him wasn’t completely selfish, but also an act of mercy. Roger was essentially dying anyway, and Cooper saved him from an arguably worse fate than death. He even took a moment to remind Roger of a happy memory before doing the deed, a scenario reminiscent of the book Of Mice And Men, when George shoots Lenny at the end after reminding him of their dream in order to save him from a worse fate as well.
And let's not forget that before the bombs dropped, Cooper struggled to even fake kill a man on screen while shooting a film, not wanting his character to go down such a dark path. This shows that he was once a man who lived by a code of morals and principals, so much so that just the idea of stepping outside of that made him deeply uncomfortable, even if it was just pretend. This is why Cooper gives Lucy the line, "Oh, I'm you, sweetie. Just... give it a little time." Because he sees himself in her, or rather the person he used to be.
One of the things I love about how Cooper’s story is told is that we get to see his present and past self right away, juxtaposed against each other. His backstory isn’t revealed as a surprise later on. Instead we really get to see up front the complexities of his character that make him so compelling. He’s not just some heartless killer. He’s like this because he’s been through so much pain, and pushed to the point where he was forced to become something he's not in order to survive and carry on. Because of this, it makes The Ghoul a lot more likable and relatable than he would have been otherwise. It also kinda lets you put yourself in his shoes and ask yourself what you would do if you found yourself in his position. Actually brilliant writing, in my opinion.
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"Do I have to kill him?" - Cooper to the director of the film he's shooting in Episode 3.
6. That tragic backstory
This is where the character of Cooper Howard really got me in the feels. Not only does Ghouly love dogs, but he loves his family too. And it’s revealed at the end of the season that even after 200+ years, they are still on his mind. He’s spent over two centuries looking for them, and putting himself through absolute hell, because he loves them that much. And not just his daughter, but his wife as well. Even though they had gotten divorced, presumably because of what he learned at the end of the season. Maybe he’s even hoping his old dog is still alive somehow, although that’s admittedly very unlikely...
So... you know what that means... Although he’s done horrible things, Cooper is a man driven by LOVE. He's stayed alive because of LOVE. He does these bad things because of LOVE. He’s become a monster IN THE NAME OF LOVE!!! It’s all about the power of LOVE, you guys. Call it cliché, but if that isn’t romantic as hell, I donno what the fuck is, ladies.
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"Now, I've waited over 200 years to ask somebody one question... Where's my fuckin' family?" - Cooper to Hank in Episode 8
In Conclusion
So yes. He's ugly. He's mean. He's murdery. Kinda toxic AF. But that doesn't mean he can't also be a sexy motherfucker as well. 👍
He's a fictional character. It's a fantasy, and fantasies are allowed to be kinda fucked up. 😃 Hey, don't ask me why humans human the way we do. I didn't make us, so I don't know. It's all in good fun though, so let's just enjoy ourselves and try not to think too hard about it, eh? 😆 (So says the person who literally just wrote a fucking essay on the subject)
Alright, well... I guess that's about it. Thank you for coming to my TEDtalk. I hope this helped anyone who was feeling their sanity slip a little bit (like me 😃). Refreshments and resources are at the back. Exits to your left. Have a lovely evening and please excuse me while I drop my mic and go find myself a fuckin' gin martini. Team Ghoul Forever, baby! 🤠
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lemon-natalia · 15 days ago
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The Locked Tomb Reaction - The Unwanted Guest
it’s taken a while, but finally I’ve been able to get around to liveblogging this! my understanding is that The Unwanted Guest takes place in that period of time where Palamedes is ousting Ianthe from Naberius’s body? so i’m intrigued to see what actually happens, as well as how Muir writes in a new theatre-play format
‘kissing or feeding; we can’t be sure’ haha what the fuck. we’re really going in right off the bat with the surrealist horror here. i had a feeling that Ianthe’s mindscape might be a disturbing place, and apparently i was right
ok so i’m willing to suspend my disbelief that this is just a description for the reader to understand the concept but … does either Palamedes or Ianthe’s subconscious know what a 20th century English butler is?
ohhh my god Ianthe’s in a French maid costume, is this because Palamedes considers it sexy. this is so cursed. once again suspension of disbelief, but do either of these characters know what France is?
i am very much enjoying the dynamic between the two of them here, especially how unimpressed Palamedes is with, well, everything Ianthe 
oooh okay thats intriguing, there’s another person’s voice here. my first instinct is that it’s Camilla, given Palamedes is currently in her body
wow Palamedes’ immediate response to a game of essentially 20 questions is to immediately get philosophical and start a debate about whether the soul can be changed. he sounds like the kind of person who would be absolute hell to play Scrabble or Trivial Pursuit against 
what they’re talking about here is very interesting though. i like the little glimpses we get, primarily through the Sixth and the Fifth, about what academia and science looks like in a world with necromancy. whether the soul can be changed is kind of a big hypothetical in the real world, but in TLT where you can literally summon or ‘consume’ a person’s soul it would be much more directly relevant 
also a very interesting point (at least what I think he’s saying?) from Palamedes here that just because the Lyctors lived for 10,000 years doesn’t necessarily mean that the thanergy powering them is perpetual, it could just be declining very very slowly
okay so the Voice just started talking about ‘Camilla’s idea’, so presumably not her unless she’s talking about herself in third person? it could theoretically just be Palamedes debating with himself? 
Palamedes briefly trying to play bad cop/Ace Attorney and intimidate Ianthe is hilarious 
Ianthe’s insistence that she didn’t murder Naberius because it was his job to die for her anyway is an … interesting perspective
‘she and I both understand that the goal is always worth the cost’ ngl i think Harrow herself would have something to say about that, given she literally gave herself a Claire’s lobotomy in the hope of saving Gideon. it wasn’t so much Harrow who decided that Lyctorhood was worth defeating Cytherea, but Gideon deciding for her 
once again i feel horribly bad for Naberius Tern, whose worst crime was pretty much just being an asshole
hah has Palamedes picked up a cigarette habit from Pyrrha. i’m enjoying the insight into his thought process here given that he generally comes off as knowing more than other people all the time, so it’s nice to see him actually in the process of figuring stuff out 
‘She wandered around like she was the protagonist’ HAH Ianthe i have bad news for you 
aww it’s sweet to get Pal’s view on Gideon here, namely that he thinks she’s smarter than even she gives herself credit for and that he was initially jealous of her dynamic with ‘Dulcinea’ but came to like her anyways
‘My problem was reminding myself you were a child’ ohhh my god the mysterious voice is Dulcinea! i can’t believe this is literally the only time we’ve seen Pal and Dulcinea actually interact. and isn't this possibly the first time that they've had an 'in person' (so to speak) interaction since most of their relationship was sending letters to each other?? oh i am not okay
okayy i’m interested in what Dulcinea’s saying here about how she seems to have died again and ‘something awful’ happened to her soul … it doesn’t seem to totally line up with what happened at the end of HtN, especially with her mention that there are two shores on the River. again everything seems to point to the nature of the River playing a big part in AtN 
woooh Magnus Quinn reference, my beloved 
oooh i love the contrast between Ianthe’s descriptions of her relationships with Corona and Babs - despite Babs being the one who was actually the cavalier, the kind of co-dependent relationship she has with Corona is much closer to the relationship between the other cavaliers and their necromancers. which is why the fact that she’s apparently the only Lyctor to outright murder their cavalier vs her admission that she wouldn’t have used Corona is very interesting to me
‘Coronabeth herself is part of your goal’ i’m very interested in the long-term goal of Ianthe in general. obviously one part was becoming a Lyctor, but i do wonder if she has something else planned, i doubt she’s content to just sort of do what John wants her to do forever
‘Jeannemary Chatur regaled me with the story at breakfast’ woooh Jeannemary reference. also this is such a cute detail
ooooh Palamedes's newfound cigarette habit is from Ianthe not Pyrrha, that's very fun
and Palamedes’ final point here that the soul is permeable is not just very satisfying against Ianthe’s general smugness, but has very interesting implications for all of the Lyctor characters, especially the fact that their titles are named after their cavaliers. for example, how much of Mercy’s devotion originally came from her versus the fact that Christabel pre-Res was a literal nun. and what does it mean for John and Alecto exactly - how much of the same person, or even human, is he after literally eating the soul of a planet
ok this isn’t to do with the Unwanted Guest exactly but i am very concerned by the notice at the very end that ‘Hell Will Break Loose’ in AtN. it already sounds ominous enough without considering that the previous notice, ‘Gideon will return’ at the end of HtN was done in the most painful way possible 
overall i really enjoyed this! what i really like about the additional short stories Muir writes for TLT is that you get to see little character moments and explore bits of the lore that would have dragged the main story down a bit, so it was very fun to see Palamedes and Ianthe interact one-on-one and debate a bit
and now i really have run out of stuff to liveblog about these books rip my sanity
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generalissimomayhem · 2 months ago
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I usually don't like my headcanons to hit too close home (my home, mind you), I want them to feel relatable but not expose too much of myself.
This is why in spite of me having autism, I don't hc a lot of characters having autism. I don't feel comfortable with putting said thing out there.
WIth that being said, with my very much recent obssession with TNMN, I feel a little more willing to work with this, probably because the characters are pretty much a blank slate.
After some careful analysis, I very personally think that if there's gotta be someone in the apartment with autism, those would be three tenants:
Robertsky Peachman, Dr. W. Afton and Rafttellyn Cappucin.
Why them? Due to how I have characterized them (even though I haven't posted about them, but I do write. I just don't publish them.) I have been able to see some characteristics about them that just scream "THEY HAVE THE 'TISM (AND SO DO I)!" but I mean... its the 50s, of course they don't know, and most probably, will die without them knowing...
And as all cases of autism, they all have stark differences between them and how autism manifests, and sameness too!
They are all on the "high functioning" spectrum. (mind you, I DO know this term is not accurate and outdated but this is what I grew up with and what I have experienced, ok? Don't bite me on the throat)
All of them are bad at socializing: Robertsky is too blunt, Afton is too uninterested and Rafttellyn is too shy.
They all have their own fixations: Robertsky with shoemaking and peaches, Afton has the math and science autism and Rafttellyn loves collecting dolls and figurines.
They have their own mannerisms and stuff:
Robertsky loves the repetitive sound and motion of sinking the nails on the shoe. He will get angry if you cut his peaches, he has to bite them, always starting with the right side. Too dense, which makes him prone to not knowing if someone insulted or fucked over him. Robertsky has the tendency to observe people's shoes and thinking what type of maintenance they could need, sometimes he has even gone directly to people going like "your shoes look rank!" and then having Albertsky drag him out of the scene while apologizing akwardly before things escalate.
Afton, well, he's a bit like Sheldon Cooper: Stiff and often very serious to the point is funny. He likes having all his things in place, very perfectionist and feels like a failure for the slightest deviation (probably a mix of autism and asian tiger parenting). Like Roberstky, can't read too deep into people, which makes him suceptible to manipulation (thing that his boss gladly used against him :'/). Lines up things with the lines of the flooring, he has had to learnt that some things in the apartment are not symmetrical and will not line up, basically had to condition himself into ignoring these things around them or he will have a meltdown. Likes to mix his food, even things that aren't ideal to mix, once he mixed american biscuits into his coffee while Mia looked at him in absolute horror.
Rafttellyn can only have purses and bags with straps, she just likes to cling and hold onto her things. She wears gloves, not only as a fashion statement but because touching things with her bare hands all the time just feels wrong. As I mentioned, she collects dolls and figurines, she has a name for all of her dolls and can recite them from head to toe, she's usually very mousy, but if you give her leeway to talk about them, she will talk your ear off. Often too reserved to the point she gives Francis a run for his money, but has had to learn how to mask it (as if women with autism weren't often more prone to masking enough), she's extremely grateful that Alf has been there to help her open up more to people instead of giving up on her and treating her like an impossible case.
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cebwrites · 2 years ago
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*slams fists on desk* MORE WATER 7!!!!! can we get some n/sfw hcs about iceberg, paulie, lucci, and kaku having their first time with a partner they find absolutely adorable, if you feel up to it. for science <3 preferably gn reader but any is ok! super bonus points if you end up mentioning lucci's bird somewhere in there
HI ANON FROM AUGUST AAAAA I HOPE YOU’RE STILL AROUND;;; i finally found the right headspace for this- i’m not too confident about iceburg or lucci, but i can absolutely do paulie and kaku, hope you enjoy <33
paulie’s ended up so fluffy ajsdhkjarhgsjdhf
First time with a cute partner (Paulie, Kaku)
gn reader nsfw under the cut word count: 0.6k
Paulie
Paulie talks a lot of shit about how much he ‘pulls’ for someone who hasn’t had sex before - well, until now at least
He’d strut all the way up to the bedroom, holding your hand like the strong comforting boyfriend he is, talking about his mad stroke game but the moment that he’s in the moment with you, and more importantly sees how adorable you are, all of that goes out the window
Paulie’s head fills with cotton floss and, sure, he’s painfully hard but the man is at a complete loss for what to do, awestruck at your expressions in the moment or the way you breathlessly whisper his name
He kind of just, freezes up, he has to roll over onto his back to cool down a little before his head explodes before he stumbles over his words trying to explain that none of this is your fault but-- gosh, your adorableness is somehow overwhelming but he’s so happy to be your man
From there the two of you would awkwardly fumble to get back to where you were, giggling and ribbing at each other the whole time between shy but feverish kisses, calming his frantic hands with yours rubbing up Paulie’s arms, shoulders and neck while you ride him
He’s much more comfortable with you in control of the pace, less room for him to fuck up, hands on your hips, singing your praises to the highest heavens - the only downside to all of this unbridled devotion is that Paulie’s a little bit of a quickshot for this first time experience
The bright side is that at least you two were being safe, Paulie’s more than willing to make up for it with head afterwards to apologize for his embarrassment, and, a puppy can be trained ♡
Kaku
He’s sweet, but Kaku, first and foremost - is a tease
Kaku’s glad that you’re as cute as you are and fluster so easily, it takes the edge off his own nerves and worries about you seeing that he’s maybe not in his best element yet
He’d shower you with compliments, tracing a burning a trail up your body with gloved fingers, and then without - he does everything in his power to make sure you feel good, playing it cool so you don’t notice just how affected he is by your charms (intentional or not)
He’d take you from behind, in large part so you wouldn’t have a good view of his face, however awkward that makes maneuvering kisses because of his nose, but also because he’d have wonderfully easy access to your body and to whisper teases, praise, obscenities into your ear
No one ever said that Kaku was particularly fair
The cat gets out of the bag eventually, though, and Kaku caves to your honey-sweet pleas to let you see him, your hands frantic to touch his body in the same way he’d done to you, mewls begging him to kiss you properly where you could face him
He’s red all the way up to his ears, grunting and panting as he fills his thoughts with nothing but you and how adorable you are underneath him, filling you with every hungry, deep stroke
Kaku gets so, very loud when you rake your nails down his back, a secret glutton for punishment, he’s moaning for you dig them in harder, to mark his body up as yours - his pace definitely picks up to match
In the afterglow of it all, he’s at least a little sheepish, but all that melts away when you kiss his cheek and the two of you dissolve into tired, sleepy smiles at one another while the sun barely peeks over the horizon
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t0ast-ghost · 5 months ago
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S3 EP19 (Requiem For Methuselah) let me guess. Kirk is romancing.
Forthwards:
- beaming down together <3
- uh oh a time limit!
- Spock grabs McCoy’s arm to get him out of the way of the fire
- very drawable right here
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- Kirk is not fucking around today
- wow. Just wow.
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- A SHAKESPEARE FIRST FOLIO?!? This guy is fucking rich holy shit
- She’s just like me when I watch Star Trek
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- I like that she wants to talk to Spock about science :))
- “What is loneliness?” “It is a thirst. It is a flower dying in a desert.” Wow
- “Thank you, Doctor. I will have a brandy.” “Do you think the two of us can handle a drunk Vulcan? Once alcohol hits that green blood—” They’re adorable
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- fuck off fuck off fuck off (edit: this is probably about them immediately flirting with Rayna)
- Bottles of colourful liquid. You think one of them is ketchup?
- Does Kirk know how to play pool? Is she showing him for no reason? He seems to know what he’s doing…
- I love that Spock likes playing musical instruments
- His boyfriend is dancing with a woman RIGHT THERE. I wonder what a rewrite of this would be like with canonical queer Kirk in a relationship with Spock and McCoy and why he would choose to dance with her. Cause I think he should be able to just enjoy doing stuff like dancing and holding hands without it being romantic. AND THEN MCCOY WALKS INTO THAT OMG THE DRAMA
- Damn Kirk isn’t interested in Spock’s info dump about Brahms. Tragic.
- and they’re kissing
- The way Kirk just pushed her out of the way-
- YEAH SAVE YOUR BOYFRIEND SPOCK!!!
- Flint kinda wishes that the bot killed Kirk
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- Yeah it sucks to be home schooled
- This is becoming like Twilight but without the baseball and vampires
- This is a horrible power imbalance between Flint and Rayna
- And they’re kissing (Nichelle nichols futurama clip where she says "I had to kiss Shatner) (edit: here's the clip at 1:26)
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- WHY IS HE SHAKING HER LIKE THAT BRO WHAT THE FUCK
- Kirk’s ass damn why is Flint hiding the Ryetalyn
- “(Spock): Captain, I shall get the Ryetalyn.” “(Kirk): Why you?” “(Spock): There may be dangers within.” “(Kirk): Let’s find out.” “(Spock): Let me go alone captain.” “(McCoy): Why? Get to the point, Spock. If there is one.” “(Kirk): We’ll all go.” Kirk and McCoy ARE NOT about to let they’re boyfriend go into a dangerous area alone
- OMG SHES BALD! (She’s bald and she’s torturing people who have hair)
- “Her only flaw, she is not human.” THATS HER FLAW??? First off Spock is RIGHT THERE. Second I'd say the flaw is that she's being controlled by a awful man
- Wait what? this guy is DA VINCI?!? And still no bitches...
- “She is my handiwork, my property.” EW DISGUSTING KILL HIM
- HE JUST BLOOPED THE ENTERPRISE OUT OF EXISTENCE
- I’m giggling
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- “Give me back my ship. Your secret is safe with us.” YOU’RE JUST GONNA LEAVE HER?
- “Because you knew I could bring her emotions alive.” Bleh
- Kirk gets absolutely beat the fuck up
- “No. Do not order me. No one can order me.” YES GET IT! YES
- “She’s human. Down to the last blood cell she’s human. Down to the last thought, hope, aspiration, emotion. She’s human. Her human spirit is free. You have no power of ownership! She’s free to do as she wishes.” Kirk’s so happy for her!
- “No man beats me.” “I don’t want to beat you. This is no test of power. Rayna belongs to herself, and she claims the human right of choice. To be, as she wills. To do as she wills. To think as she wills.”
- Okay but she shouldn’t have to choose between two men. There’s so many more out there in the galaxy
- OH NO DHES SEAD
- “What happened?” “She loved you, captain.” Spock just admitted Kirk’s drop dead gorgeous
- This is giving boyfriend vs. father vibes which I hate. I hate that this is how women are treated. As burdens to be thrown from one man to the next. This is reminding me of A Dolls House by Henrik Ibsen it's a pretty short play and the ending is phenomenal for the time
- Kirk is lonely :(
- “If only I could forget.” Spock spends several seconds staring at Kirk and contemplating until McCoy comes in
“Oh thank heavens, sleeping at last.” McCoy just wants Kirk to get a good nights rest
- yeah
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- “You see, I feel sorrier for you I do for him…because you’ll never know the things that love can drive a man to. The ecstasies, the miseries. The broken rules, the desperate chances. The glorious failures, and the glorious victories. All of these things you’ll never know, simply because the word ‘love’ isn’t written into your book. Good night, Spock.” “Good night, Doctor.” WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT AND WHY HAVENT I SEEN AN EDIT TO THAT. Also now I REALLY wanna write a mcspirk fanfic based solely on THAT
- “I do wish he could forget her.” BOTH McCoy and Kirk wished for this and so Spock does something crazy for his loves omg omg I’m gonna throw up wtf
- there’s literally romantic music playing in the background as Spock leans down to mind meld and says “forget”
Well
Masterpost
Episode written by Jerome Bixby
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runesp00r · 15 days ago
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The long-awaited (by absolutely no one) Peter Pettigrew post is here! I mentioned it in my discussion of my James Potter Savior Complex post, and wanted to follow-up just in case anyone was genuinely curious about this rat of a human. Again, I’ll preface by saying this post isn’t meant to demean or criticize any other characterizations that other fans have — this is just how I took it.
I’m a political science major. A lot of the stuff I learn is determined by the environment where things occur, and the time in which they happen. I think this idea applies to characters as much as it does public policy and state formation, so it’s hard to say that any of the Marauders would act the same way they do in canon if they were in the modern era. Peter is the lone exception, because people like him exist in spades. They always have.
He’s fucked over from the start. He’s an overweight, unattractive, acne-ridden teen in the 70s who happens to be friends with three guys who are either a) conventionally attractive, capable, and perfect or b) terrifying enough to be given a wide berth by your average student. Moreover, you feel like an outsider because the other three — and I’m going under the assumption that these guys were in a shared dormitory — had already become friends, and added you as an afterthought. From the get-go, you’re on the outside looking in. It’s only rational that, over the years — and despite the fact that Lupin wanted you to be included — you internalize the idea that you’re a weirdo. That you’re strange and pitiable and that they only hang around you because they feel bad for you. And outside of James, I don’t think any of them did feel that way.
The truth is that they actually do try to include him, and quite often. I’m partial to the idea that the Marauders were like a group of frat dudes, who threw a lot of parties and did a lot of dumb shit all the time, alongside bullying and hexing other students who gave them flack for anything at all. Doesn’t make them good people, but they sure were great friends. And they didn’t actively shove Peter out of the group or try to, from what I can tell. James and Sirius respected Lupin’s wishes to integrate him, and he even participated in their favorite group activity: bullying Severus Snape.
But if you’ve already internalized the idea, it becomes an ego issue. He’s so self-absorbed because of how you were raised and seen from childhood that every little thing is a slight. He’s so caught up in what they “really” think of him that he misses the fact that they are actually being nice to him. In the only way frat boys can be, of course. I can assure you James has tried to hook Peter up with some girls before, or shared drinks or invited him to whatever kind of ragers wizards have. Maybe initially it was out of obligation, but now it’s choice. After all, he did become their Secret Keeper.
But this is the core issue of Peter Pettigrew. He thinks everyone is fake because he is fake. He’s a liar and a shrew who wants to be on top at the end of the day, and is willing to do what it takes to get it. He can stomach the feeling of being an outsider to the Marauders if everyone else in the school thinks he’s part of their year’s most infamous group. There’s clout in that, and fame. He’s the kind to exercise that reputation when he can, the kind who gets a rush from the success which is unique from the rush James or Sirius gets from their own harassment. James’ issue is his arrogance, but he’s not addicted to a power high. Peter is.
You don’t get to be a part of a group like the Marauders for that long unless they think you’re a good person. I think Peter, like everyone else, was a victim of circumstance. He was the only one who didn’t join the group based on who he was as a person. Rather, he got the only friends he’d ever had because of his connection to someone stronger and more popular than him.
See how this reflects in his future? He’s a rat through and through — all the Marauders represent the animals they could shift into.
And with him and Lupin… oh, it’s torturous. Peter gets James killed and Severus framed, and does nothing to Lupin (from what I can recall!). Lupin gets off scot-free. Peter probably thought he was being nice, finally paying Remus back for the kindness he received at Hogwarts, not getting him hunted down. For Lupin, this was hell. He was the only one left, and he believed Peter was dead for so long.
So terrible! But so very Peter Pettigrew, who sold out his friends the moment he saw a chance to latch onto someone else who was becoming the new power, the winning power. He’s a group thinker in the sense that he just follows the trends he’s surrounded by, too afraid to strike out on his own unless it can guarantee him a spot near the top.
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rabbithaver · 14 days ago
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ok i know i didnt throw silver today here on tumblr but frankly i have been super busy, and now that i'm free, i'm totally exhausted. i'm gonna have to take a rain check on throwing him today, but rest assured that i DID throw him irl. and i'm holding him right now. so he's getting the love he deserves, i promise :)
i just hosted a 7 hour Bumblekast Server Movie Night since there was no recording today. it went so well!!! we watched Interstellar and The Martian, two of my all-time favorite films. i talked so much with so many people that now my throat hurts and i am absolutely exhausted... but oh my god, we had so much fun. i got to connect with a ton of friends in the server whose voices i'd never heard before. i got to infodump about my special interests to people who genuinely cared to hear what i had to say. we got to crack jokes and have fun during breaks. the very first ever Bumblekast Server Movie Night was, overall, a huge success!
in fact, it was such a successful event that i am going to have to host a second screening of Interstellar! like eight people really wanted to join us and see it, but couldn't due to their schedules. i've promised them that i'll ping them when i start planning the next screening so that way we can make sure everyone is able to participate. and Interstellar is one of those movies i will happily watch several times a week so it all works out.
everyone seemed to love the movies, and they even seemed to appreciate the fact that i had behind-the-scenes trivia and facts about the science in the movies. one of my huge worries is that people i watch movies with get annoyed when i share things like that, but if anything, folks seemed to appreciate the movies more because of it.
man, i know i keep saying it, but i really do love the Bumblekast community so much. i have never felt so at ease with so many people. i've never felt like a burden or an annoyance there... like, i truly think it's where i belong. everyone is so caring and supportive, especially the mod team and Kyle. hell, Kyle even set up an event in the server for me so that we could spread the word to people! it was such a kind gesture.
that place truly is something so special. i've been there since September 15, 2023, and i can count on one hand how many genuine fights and bigoted statements i've seen. the mod team is so exceptional at maintaining a positive and friendly atmosphere there. it helps that they nip heated conversations in the bud before they can become arguments. they're also very easy to talk to —they're all so incredibly funny and approachable. they're constantly interacting with the community, too. and they're also really willing to work with people.
for example, occasionally i've broken rules by accident or flown too close to the sun with a joke and they've had to DM me about it. and they know that i have severe anxiety, so when they broach these subjects with me, they know to say right off the bat, "hey, you're not in trouble or anything and we aren't mad, we just need to talk to you about something." it's a little thing, but it seriously means so much to me. the fact that they keep my struggles in mind when doing their jobs is proof to me that they care about the community they support.
a lot of discord servers have mods who are very... distant with their communities. like, they don't participate in conversation amongst members, or they take jokes way too seriously, or they throw their weight around just to intimidate users into submission. those discord server mods just don't bother interacting with their communities, either because they're too busy, or they're not interested in what their members are doing, or in the worst cases, they think they're better than everyone else. i've encountered a lot of these people before and they're always so unpleasant. it just highlights to me how unique the Bumbleserver is.
i'm so fucking glad i got into Sonic, man. if i hadn't watched the game grumps play Frontiers, i never would have picked up the comics. i never would have known how much fun they are. i never would have started listening to the Bumblekast. i never would have decided to create the clips blog. i never would've been reached out to by Puppy Bumblekast, who i now consider one of my closest friends. and of course, i never would have claimed Silver as my son, which lead to Seán reaching out to me. i never would have fallen so thoroughly in love with him, either. 💖
ok that was a WAY longer post than i meant it to be . im really really tired so im gonna go to bed. goodnight everybody
goodnight my friends!
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deadbydangit · 1 year ago
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This might be strange and you may not even know what I'm talking about, but could you write characters with an S/o who acts like Jinx from Arcane?
Maybe this with Ghostface and Leon? Feel free to add any and all people if you do take the request. Thank you ^^
I did a bit of research on this character. She sounds rather chaotic but intelligent. So I'm going to go with that. I hope that's okay if I add one more to it as well. I hope you enjoy it.
With a Reader who is chaotic and intelligent.
Ghostface, Leon, Legion (Frank)
Ghostface
Yeah, let's fuck some shit up.
You and Danny are like the same person.
Much to everyone else's dismay.
Your collective appetite for chaos knows no bounds.
You could both be asleep when Danny shakes you to wake you up.
"Hey I remember this fucked up joke and wanted to tell you."
And you're both just going to laugh.
And then go right back to sleep.
You're both inseparable.
If he could sneak you into every trial to help him, he so would.
"Like, babe, think of the ways we can kill survivors together."
The Entity, much to everyone's delight, refuses to let that happen.
So you both go terrorize whoever happens to be in the woods at that time.
Not as fun, but still entertaining.
Your intelligence has helped him numerous times when it comes to constricting any sort of trap he'd like.
And he won't have to worry if his precious camera ever gets damaged.
The pranks you pull in each other are great.
The pranks you both work on together are masterpieces.
You are the bain of everyone else's existence.
And you both wouldn't have it any other way.
Leon S Kennedy
He has his hands full with you.
He may have the intelligence to match.
But he's a hero, not... Whatever you are.
He'll often walk in on you building some crazy invention or trap.
He is highly concerned.
More about everyone else.
Because that does NOT look safe.
He does take interest in some of your inventions.
Watching you build and explain them, watching how passionate you are about your craft.
It's super cute to him.
Leon is absolutely going to do that stereotypical hero thing where he tries to make you 'see the light' and 'renounce your evil ways.'
Good luck with that buddy.
Leon is very agile, alert, and fairly smart.
So pulling a prank on him takes some work.
If you do manage, he'll applaud your determination and creativity.
Provided it isn't something dangerous.
If he wants you to hold still for a while, he'll challenge you to a boardgame or chess.
This is where his competitive nature shines.
But it's all in good fun.
He never goes easy on you though.
Just because you love him doesn't mean he's going to let you win.
You've already won his love.
Legion (Frank)
Anarchy! Anarchy!
Frank has no idea what that word means, but it sounded cool and he heard you say it once.
He might not be the sharpest tool in the shed.
But he loves you for the chaotic crazy you are.
He's so down to pull pranks too.
And he's always willing to help you whenever he can.
Need him to sneak into Caleb's workshop to grab supplies for your newest invention?
On it!
"Hey. Want to go put mentos and coke in one of Herman's test tubes?"
That's the closest thing to a science experiment you're going to get from this boy.
Just be honored he's making an effort for you.
You might even see him trying to make inventions of his own.
You inspire him.
His lack of regard for the safety of himself or the safety of others might be a concern to others.
But the both of you couldn't give less of a shit about it.
You only live once.
Well, technically not in the realm.
But it's the principal of the matter.
Frank doesn't know what you mean when you say that, but you're smart and it sounded cool so he's going to say it too.
And, he knows you're cool, so he'll say it.
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fanmoose12 · 1 year ago
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Hi there! I've got a high school castes Levihan prompt for you, should you choose to receive it.
It's based on the 'I was talking crap about teacher A to teacher B and here they are at Target holding hands' idea! Maybe in this version Hange's a science teacher and Levi is the neurotic janitor. Who would have sensed the danger in venting about the janitor's psychotic standards on cleanliness and school rules to Hange? Who would have thought that those 2, in fact, had a little secret something going on...? Looking forward to what you come up with!
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Jean is fucked.
Jean is so, so fucked, and not even in the good way, not in the way he would have preferred to, not by a certain gorgeous black-haired beauty with eyes as magnificent as dark sky on a cloudless night, who would absolutely destroy him, at least, according to the fantasies that replay through his mind every time he makes it (and his hand) wander.
No, he's fucked in a cruel, merciless way, in a way that makes his knees tremble and his heart beat way too fast at the mere thought about it.
Honestly, Jean kinda wants to run straight to his mother, to hide behind her back and bury himself in her warm and safe (and that is his absolute priority) arms.
But he is seventeen years old, he's all grown-up. Wise beyond his years. Smart, incredibly brave. And very, very handsome. If his mother is to be believed. Which she absolutely must be. She wouldn't lie to him, right?
After all, mothers know their children best and all that.
So, grown-up, smart, incredibly brave and very, very handsome Jean doesn't allow himself to seek protection. He doesn't rush in his mother's arms, doesn't hide or quiver. He stands up tall, looks the danger right into its eyes, and-
Runs as far from it as fast he can, abandoning the snacks he's been craving throughout the whole day.
He'll probably have to later apologize about it to the poor girl, who tirelessly works at this store. He will do just that, beg her for forgiveness, get on his knees if she'd wish to, even volunteer to cover a shift or two for her.
But right now- his life is in grave danger, and Jean runs away, forgetting about sense, logic, honor and all those things that his mother was trying so hard to breed in him.
He runs until he's out of breath, until his legs all but give out. And stops only, when a familiar-looking house appears in his view.
It's Yeager's, because of course it is. Evidently, it's yet another sign that the universe is set on absolutely crushing him. Perhaps, it's a punishment, Jean thinks, for his incredible wit and unbelievably good looks.
But beggars can't be choosers, so loathe Eren though he does, Jean still knocks on the door of his house. Eren might be his mortal enemy and a jerk with a stupid face and ugly mouth that constantly spills out some bullshit, but Jean's situation is nothing short of dire, and he absolutely must vent his frustrations out to someone. And if fate decided that Yeager will be the one fulfilling the role of a willing listener, then so be it.
He can always punch that dickhead later, after he pours his heart and soul out to him.
It doesn't take long for his knocking to be answered, and, unexpectedly, Eren is not the one to open the door.
It's Mikasa, badass and beautiful Mikasa, who sets Jean's heart aflame like no other living person does. Even now, the sight of her takes his breath away, makes his heart flutter in a way it always does in her presence, although the glorious sensation is somewhat dulled by a prickle of resentment.
What is Mikasa doing at Yeager's house? Why does she never visit Jean? Are these two really-
His suspicions halt, as Mikasa's forehead creases with worry, and she asks in that gorgeous, deep voice of hers,
"Jean? Is everything alright?"
Mikasa's concern warms his heart, but the memory of the events that led him here serves as the metaphorical bucket of cold water that twists Jean's insides into a knot.
But he can't very well show it, not to Mikasa, the girl of his dreams, the absolute queen of his heart.
"Of course!" he lies blatantly, feeling proud - his voice didn't even waver, he didn't sound like that same pride is the only thing stopping him from bursting into tears. Good job, he congratulates himself after managing to put a hopefully convincing enough smile. "I just stopped by for- for a quick chat."
Mikasa's frown deepens. "With Eren?"
"Naturally," Jean says, before he can stop himself. "Me and him, we're great friends."
"If you say so..." Mikasa mumbles, sounding not at all convinced. But she does let him inside the house, and on a day that's already going horribly for him, Jean decides to count it as a win.
He follows Mikasa to Eren's room upstairs, and finds that she's not the only guest. Armin, Sasha and Connie are there too.
So all of them are hanging out together? And no one thought to invite him as well? What a bunch of traitors.
"Yo, Jean!" Sasha waves at him. She's lying on Eren's bed with her feet propped against the wall and head hanging upside down, and Jean debates if he should comment on it, but promptly decides against it. It's not the weirdest thing he's seen today, and definitely not the weirdest thing he's seen Sasha do.
"Hey, dude!" Connie turns to greet him too, eyeing him with an uncharacteristically thoughtful expression on his face. "Are you good?"
"You do look a little pale..." Armin chimes in.
Eren's the only one who doesn't at all react to Jean's arrival, opting to just glare menacingly at him. But he doesn't even try to throw him out of his house, and Jean is already grateful for that. If Eren wishes to just stare at him, that's more than fine with him. He's too emotionally drained to start another argument or even glare back at the boy.
He plops down on the floor next to Connie, and sighs so loudly and wearily that all eyes are instantly glued to him.
"Guys..." he begins, "There is something I need to tell you..."
"Oh!" Connie reacts instantly, beaming like it's a Christmas day. "You finally decided to come clean about your crush on Mikasa?"
Very quickly the room goes very quiet. And still. Jean promptly averts his eyes, doing all he can to summon a hole that will hopefully swallow him whole, while Mikasa fidgets with her skirt, a blush that Jean would have found absolutely breathtaking had he had the courage to look up at her, rapidly spreading on the apple of her cheeks.
"You idiot! That was supposed to be a secret!" Sasha hisses, smacking Connie's head. She probably meant to say it quietly, in a whisper that no one but Connie would be able to hear, but the universe hates Jean, so, of course, the whole room hears it.
The silence gets even more excruciating. It really is the worst day of his life. Jean can't even find it in himself to get mad at two dimwits he for some reason considers to be his best friends. He doesn't feel embarrassed too, not too much anyway.Mikasa now knows about his undying love for her, so what of it? His life is ruined anyway.
"Jean," Armin, kind and wonderful Armin, reaches out to him, offering a gentle smile and redirecting everyone's attention from the moment that will surely haunt Jean's nightmares for months to come. "You wanted to tell us something?"
And bringing it back to the moment that will haunt the rest of his now no doubt much shorter life.
But he came not just to feel sorry for himself. He came here to share his grievances, to warn the others to not repeat the mistake he's already made. He might as well spill it already.
"Well, yeah, you see, it's about janitor Levi..."
"That jerk?" Eren perks up. "I fucking hate that guy. He made me wash the floor of the whole east wing after I spilled some soda."
"Yeah, he's a bit intense," Sasha agrees. "He once threw out my burrito, because he said it stinks. I mean, who does that?"
"You think that's intense?" Connie exclaims. "He threatened to cut my dick off if he sees me missing the toilet once again."
"Well, he'd be right to do so, Connie," Sasha chides. "That's totally disgusting."
"I can't help it sometimes!"
"I've heard that he's actually a gangster," Armin says, interrupting Sasha and Connie's bickering. "And that's why he works at school. You know, so that'd be easier to sell drugs to the kids."
"He never offered me any drugs..." Connie complains. "You think that's because of the whole missing the toilet thing?"
Jean rolls his eyes at him, deciding to not dignify that nonsense with a reply. "What does it matter? What matters is that the guy is a psycho. I mean, you all agree with me, don't you?" He pauses, waits for everyone to nod their agreement, then continues, "Well, that's why I've shared some of our... mutual reservations about him to Hange-san. You know, just to vent out my frustration at the guy. And you know how Hange-san is totally cool and understanding, right?"
Once again, everyone murmurs their agreement.
"So, I ranted a bit about janitor Levi, maybe, called him names a few times... but Hange-san was laughing as I did so! Of course, they then told me that he's simply a complicated man and other stuff along those lines, but at the moment I thought they were just being professional and what not, but today I went to the store to buy some snacks, and I met Hange-san there, and janitor Levi was there too, and, well... they were holding hands and I think I even saw them share a quick kiss, like they were a couple or something..."
A chorus of 'Hange-san and janitor Levi?', 'holding hands?", 'a couple?' and a collective 'ew' erupts. Jean waits for it to settle down, before quietly inquiring,
"You don't think that Hange-san is plotting to kill me, right? I mean, as cool as they are, they're a bit crazy too, and I just insulted their boyfriend to their face, and they're a science teacher, they must know how to dispose of a body, I saw that on Breaking Bad, and..."
Jean's ranting, he knows, and maybe he's began hyperventilating too, and he's definitely in a desperate need of a hug, preferably from Mikasa, but all that he gets are sympathetic looks, and-
A scream from Yeager.
"Fuck!" he yells, beginning to pull at his hair with worrying ferocity. "Fuck, fuck, fuck! I didn't know they were together! I thought they hated one another, what the fuck! Guys, I-" he pauses, then looks ahead like a man that's about to be hanged. "Just the other day, I... I kinda told janitor Levi that Hange-san is batshit crazy, and that they... stink worse than a monkey's poo."
The whole room is rendered speechless, everyone is gawking at Eren with a mix of shock, sympathy and premature grief. And Jean- Jean bursts out laughing.
He was wrong. He was so, so wrong. It's not the worst day of his life, far from it. It's definitely one of the better ones. And it's bound to get even greater - when he witnesses janitor Levi beating the living shit out of Yeager.
He reaches out to him, clasps his shoulder just a bit too forcefully. "My friend," he says, with a grin that's threatening to break his face. "You're so fucked."
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