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suugarbabe · 10 months

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Softer Side (pt.3)

[Final part 😘]

Pairing: Mattheo Riddle x reader

Word Count: ~1.9k

Warning: fighting, mentions of blood, fluff

sorry this did not end in smut, but this whole series has been about Mattheo's soft side so I felt it was only right it ended fluffy 😌

Your senses were enveloped with what you’ve become familiar with as Mattheo’s scent. The smell of lemons and patchouli with the ever familiar hint of tobacco was slowly becoming your favorite. His strong arms wrapped around your shoulders from behind as he placed a gentle kiss to your temple. You smiled at the tender gesture as he sat down at the table next to you. “Coming to study with me, Teo? Are you feeling ill?” You placed the back of your hand on his forehead in a teasing manner.

He knocked your hand back playfully, “You should know me better than that, y/n/n. Studying on a Friday?” You snorted, “Studying at all…” Mattheo rolled his eyes, “Do you wanna know why I’m really here, Princess?” You nodded, leaning your head on your hand. “There’s going to be a party tonight, in the Slytherin common room.” When your face was unchanging Mattheo raised his eyebrows at you, “You’re coming, right?” You sighed, leaning back in your chair, “Dunno, might just keep studying.”

He groaned like a child being told no sweets before dinner, “C’mon…please come. You never come to parties.”

“How do you know I don’t go to parties?”

“You’re not the only one who’s people watched this year,” his wink caused an immediate flush to your cheeks. “You can get ready with Pansy, then you can sit by us the whole time. It’ll be fun, we’ll drink, play games. Theo will ask you to smoke and you can deny him, it’ll be the best of times.” You gnawed on the inside of your cheek, contemplating your decision. The longer your thought the closer Mattheo was bringing his face. Closer and closer and closer until his nose was pressed against your cheek. He knew your answer before you could even say ‘yes’, knowing the grin on your face meant he won and you would be going. He stood triumphantly, letting out a slightly too loud cheer and being shushed by Madam Pince. He kissed your cheek, letting you know he’d see you at the party as he and the other boys ‘needed to finish some planning’.

You did your best to continue to study, even for a few hours. But your nerves about the party were too loud. You decided to find Pansy, seeing if she’d spend a little extra time helping you get ready as this was your first party in a long time. She was more than excited, practically destroying her dorm room with flying dresses, tops, and skirts. She finally landed on you wearing an emerald green pleated skirt, a little shorter than you normally wear; falling just above mid-thigh. Your top was a black crop top with two delicate strings criss-crossing around your abdomen and tying in the back. She had you accessorize with a dark green velvet choker and a gorgeous silver snake ring. Pansy argued that you should wear heels but thankfully she let you opt for shiny black doc martens.

You looked yourself over again, doubt clouding your brain. Pansy encouraged you, telling you how good you looked and how much Mattheo would be drooling over you. You pushed your doubts aside, entering the party with Pansy hand in hand as she led you to the rest of the group. Mattheo greeted you with a kiss, whispering in your ear about how breathtaking he thought you looked in the Slytherin house colors. He brought you down to the couch with him, draping your legs over his lap. You all talk and joke together, playing some games and drinking. You needed a refill, so Pansy agreed to go with you, both of you agreeing to grab some drinks for some others. You were surprised how well the night was going. Until it wasn’t.

“Can you believe who Mattheo’s been spending time with all night?” You stilled at the drink table, listening now to the conversation of the girls behind you. “Oh god, yes. Little mouse of a girl, that Ravenclaw. I mean, what does he think he’s going to accomplish?” You were seething now, Pansy noticing your change in demeanor. You made eye contact with her, her eyebrows raising as if to ask you what’s wrong. You opened your mouth to answer, but then you heard the girls voices again, mocking you and Mattheo, talking poorly about him and his intentions. You couldn’t take it.

You turned around, grabbing the main girl's shoulder. “What the bloody hell is your problem? Have you ever even had one conversation with Mattheo or do you just pine for him from afar like a loser?” You'd forgotten about the drinks, hands at your side clenching and unclenching. Pansy was behind you, arms crossed and smirking. The girl scoffed, “Do I have to? Everyone knows how he is.”

“You have no idea how he is. You don’t know the first real thing about him,” you were doing your best to stay calm, but you could feel your anger rising. One more thing, just one more ignorant thing out of her mouth and you weren’t going to be able to control yourself. The smirk that formed on the girl’s face told you that she thought her next words were going to make her seem like she knew it all, “You think because he gave you a few hickey’s that it’s your job to defend him now? Do you even know the number of girls he’s done that to? You are not special to him. He’s a prick, always been a prick, always will be a prick. Honestly we’re doing you a favor leveling out your expectations right now.”

And there it was, your boiling point. You turned your head slightly, speaking to Pansy now, “Do me a favor, Pans?” She nodded her head, confused by the smile forming on your face, “Go get Mattheo, maybe Theo too while you’re at it.” The girl across from you gave you a mocking pout, “What’s wrong? Need big bad Mattheo and friends to come defend you, feeling bad now?” You closed your eyes, pinching the bridge of your nose as you tried to contain your laughter. The girl clearly confused by your response. You took a deep breath, opening your eyes and making direct eye contact with her, “God no. Pansy’s gonna go get them for your sake. Because they’re going to be the only one’s strong enough to stop me from beating the shit out of you.”

The girl opened her mouth to respond, but your fist was already connecting with her nose. She doubled over in pain, and you used this as an opportunity to throw her down to the ground. You pushed her back to the ground, kneeling over her chest as you took swings at her. You had to give her some props, she really did try to fight back for a moment, pulling at the strings of your top and trying to grab at your hair. You laughed slightly at her efforts, which probably made you look slightly more crazy than you already did to the crowd that was forming around the both of you. You got one more good swing in before you were being lifted into the air, the same familiar scent of lemon and patchouli filling your senses like this afternoon.

The girl was lucky Mattheo was so strong, because you were thrashing against his grasp but he still held you like you weighed nothing. Your adrenaline and anger still high as ever, not wanting to be done with the fight, “Mattheo you let me down right now, she deserves it.” You felt him chuckle against your back, “No way, princess. Parties over for you. You keep thrashing around and you’ll make me have to use a binding spell on you.” You slumped immediately, making him laugh again. He carried you to his dorm, finally setting you down once you exited the hall. He led you to the bathroom, where he lifted you back up to have you sit on the large countertop, hands settling on either side of your thighs, “Now, you wanna tell me why I just witnessed my innocent little Ravenclaw in a fight that easily rivaled one I would get myself into?”

You averted your gaze, looking down at your hands in your lap. Your bruised and bloodied hands. You wanted to feel awful, but her words played in your head again, “She was being a cunt.” You mumbled your response, causing Mattheo to tilt your chin up, forcing your eyes on his, “Come again, darling?” You sighed deeply, speaking more clearly this time, “She was being a cunt.” Mattheo was laughing again. You were glad he found this whole situation so amusing. “While I don’t doubt that, do you mind telling me exactly what happened to earn her the title?” He took one of your hands in his, grabbing his wand with the other. He started waving his want over your injured knuckles as you explained to him what happened. How you overheard them talking about you, and what they thought his intentions were. How you told them to shove off, then they told you that you were just another girl to him. Which, you clarified, was fine if it were true, but that he did not deserve to be talked about that way just because they were jealous of you being the current girl gaining his attention.

Mattheo finished mending your hands, then did a quick once over of your face and neck to make sure you didn’t have any other injuries before he responded. “You know, usually I’m the one getting mended, kind of a nice change to be the one taking care of somebody.” You blushed as he continued, “You're not just some girl to me, y/n. Not just another name on some list I have in my nightstand. You're different. Special to me." You looked at him with wide eyes, not quite expecting those words to be told to you. He cupped your face, thumb rubbing your cheek gently before placing a kiss to the other side.

"You seem to have this habit of defending me, y/n. Why do you get so mad when someone talks bad about me, love? You know most of what they say is probably true.” You shook your head, “It’s not true. Not the Mattheo I know. Not my Mattheo.” He hummed at your words, “Mm, your Mattheo. I like the sound of that.” You giggled slightly, pushing his shoulder, “You know what I mean. Just- I see a different side of you.” He nodded, dimples on full display as he came to stand between your legs, “Yeah, you do. But there’s another side that I’ve just been dying to show you.”

You wrapped your arms around his neck, looking up at him through your lashes, “Is that so? And what side would that be, sir?” That last word alone caused his irises to flash just a shade darker, pupils slowly growing, “Careful with your words, princess.” His hands gripping the underside of your thighs, your legs wrapping around his waist. You were feeling confident now, leaning in to whisper in his ear, “I’m always very careful…sir.” He lifted you up then, carrying you from the bathroom to his bed, making promises to show you a different side of him that he said was also just for you.

#annnnnd it's done #not super happy about the ending but still generally happy nonetheless #mattheo riddle #softer side #softer side series #mattheo riddle x you #mattheo riddle x y/n #mattheo riddle x reader #golden era #harry potter

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twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat · 6 months

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you drink your coffee black and we are afraid of each other ; shoko ieiri

synopsis; shoko makes you a morning cup of coffee; turns out she’s not very good at that, but it’s the thought that counts.

word count; 4.2k

contents; shoko ieiri/reader, gn!reader (but written w a fem!reader in mind), fluff fluff fluff!!, just normal morning shenanigans at the ieiri household, implied stsg (my brand), shoko can be a girlfailure. as a treat, reader is absolutely whipped (and so am i)

a/n; been writing too much gojo n geto lately. neglecting my wife :((((((( let it be known that i am a shoko stan first human second. this one is for my wlws pls eat up!!!!

you wake up to the sound of your girlfriend’s voice.

melodic and soft, low and saccharine; almost like she’s coaxing you out of hiding. a sound so lovely you wish you could drown in it, laced together with a distinctly raspy tilt, one you can only attribute to the copious amounts of cigarettes she smoked back in high school. a leftover residue, bittersweet memories ghosting her lips — one that gets you a little bit weak in the knees.

in the mornings, it’s particularly prominent, a little intoxicating. manifesting itself as a shiver down your spine, a jolt of your heartbeat, a flush on your skin for every word that she speaks. it’s enough to have you slipping from sleep’s embrace, carried back into the cradle of reality.

why you notice her voice first, and not the smell of something burning — or the sound of insistent beeping — is honestly beyond you.

it doesn’t take long for your sleepy brain to react, however, a pang of anxiety rushing through your slumbering veins. hurriedly stirring you awake. abrupting your dreamlike, drowsy state, tangled up in silken sheets with your neck smudged by lipstick marks; an alluring red, one shoko typically favors when she’s going out for a drink. coming home just a tiny bit tipsy, affectionate and giggly.

and when your eyelids finally flutter open, your mind melting into the motion of the waking world, you shoot up in a sudden bout of panic.

because fuck, you belatedly, groggily realize — that’s the fucking fire alarm.

and shoko is spewing curses, from afar, loud enough that you can hear it even through the fog of fatigue that clouds your brain. a raspy string of words that you don’t quite catch, but they’re enough to have you scrambling out of bed, nearly bumping into the doorframe as you kick the blanket off your legs.

”what happened?” you croak out, chest heaving a little, having stumbled into the smoke-filled kitchen. disgruntled, reeling with the aftermath of your deep slumber, cold air nipping at your bare skin. the balcony door is open, and the smell of rain invades your apartment.

when you look out the window, all you see is a gray sky, blanketed by a thick coating of wool. smothered by clouds, not a single ray of sunlight slipping through the cracks. the world smells dewy and sweet, asphalt and flowers melting into a nostalgic fragrance, one that reminds you a bit of high school smoke breaks — huddling under the slide at the nearest playground, watching a pretty girl wrap her lips around a cigarette, exhaling smoke just for it to melt into the pouring rain.

one that reminds you a bit of the woman right in front of you, balancing on a chair and stretching her goosebump-ridden arms towards the ceiling, wearing nothing but a lacey bra and a pair of unbuttoned jeans. messy hair that cascades down her back, brows furrowed, eyes simmering with irritation — before flitting over to meet your own.

shoko blinks. then sighs. ”you woke up?” she mutters, and you try not to shiver when the tremor of her voice deepens, morning-fatigue seeping into the syllables. “fuck. sorry, i —”

she stumbles a little, shifting her weight from one foot to another, and you take a step forward. on instinct, as if getting ready to cushion her fall. ready to be of service, in any way you can.

”don’t worry,” she fumbles with the fire alarm, clicking her tongue. nails scraping against plastic. “it’s fine, i just need to — there we go.”

finally, the beeping stops. and your shoulders relax, immediately, the tight little ball inside your chest untangling. with a deep inhale, the fragrance of espresso and smoke fills your nostrils, and a sense of calm washes over you. rooting your feet to the floor.

shoko settles down, too, seating herself on the wooden chair. a huff slipping from her lips. they’re smudged, a blurry red she still hasn’t found the energy to wipe away.

bringing a hand up to card through her hair, lithe fingers in between her messy auburn locks, she exhales. a blend between fatigue and relief.

”god. i need a cig.”

a moment passes. she raises her head, and sees the sleepy little pout playing at your lips — her eyes softening. blooming with something fond. giving you a smile, tired, small. but reassuring.

”i’m just kidding, love,” she chuckles. “relax.”

”don’t joke about that,” you frown, rubbing the sleep from your weary eyes. stifling a tiny yawn. ”.. took me so long to get you to quit.”

(sometimes you can still see the smoke leave her lungs when she exhales.)

shoko keeps smiling, but doesn’t say anything else. the pitter patter of rain against your balcony railing fills the silence of the kitchen, still brimming with a light layer of smoke, slowly dwindling. cold air drawing it out. clad only in one of suguru’s old t-shirts, you shiver, and shoko seems to notice.

“good morning,” she coaxes, opening her arms slightly — and you move forward, a moth to a flame. without thinking. “sorry for waking you.”

she wraps her arms around your waist, attaching her jaw to the curve of your shoulder, and you melt into the embrace. leaning close, to tuck yourself into her neck. she smells like lavender shampoo. “‘s fine,” you mumble, a yawn muffled into her collarbone. “what happened? are you okay?”

when her plump lips press against the sensitive skin of your neck, right next to one of the kiss marks she left there last night, you can’t help but shiver again. she must feel it, because you can hear the smile she’s trying to bite back in her voice when she answers.

“mm,” she hums, a gravelly noise that makes your throat clog up a little. “just burned something, it’s fine. don’t worry.”

tentatively, you take a step back. just to see her. gazing down at her, into her hazel eyes, the fading crescents beneath them. not as dark as they used to be, not as heavy with lost sleep.

shoko is gorgeous. always, every single day, but you think she’s particularly breathtaking like this. when it’s early, and she’s groggy and a little disheveled, eyes weary and lipstick smudged — bra strap close to slipping off her shoulder, black lace against pale skin, moles littering her forearms and chest like star clusters. oversized jeans that expose the curve of her waist, the fat of her hips, and you don’t notice how intently you’re staring until shoko’s raspy voice reaches your burning ears.

“eyes up here, baby.”

you do as you’re told, and she stifles a chuckle. eyes rich with amusement. you try not to blush.

“sorry.” you chew at the inside of your cheek. eyes trailing to the houseplants by the windowsill. “.. you’re just so pretty.”

shoko tilts her head, an exasperated little breath rolling off her tongue. almost a coo. she’s incapable of blushing; but if she wasn’t, you’re sure she'd blush.

“thanks.” her touch is light, fingertips trailing down the expanse of your arm. “you are, too. red is a good colour on you.”

you blink. shoko’s eyes are crinkled at the edges, soft lines of crows’ feet, and you huff when you realize she’s talking about the marks on your neck. suddenly a little self-conscious, you bring a hand up to rub at the skin — as if hoping to wipe them away. you doubt it works. shoko just breathes out an airy chuckle, getting up from her seat.

she looks tired, still. stretching her limbs out, sleepily, blinking drowsily.

and it’s odd, you think. that she got up this early, that she didn’t cling to you and make you stay with her in bed like she usually does. you don’t know anyone who loves sleeping in more than shoko does. especially after a night out.

so it’s strange. very strange.

“hey, sho.”

“hm?”

you tilt your head. “why are you up this early, anyway?”

she blinks, and then glances at the clock on the wall. ticking idly, counting down. when she looks back at you, she’s got a single eyebrow raised. “it’s not really early.”

“for you it is,” you quip, something resembling a grin tugging at your lips. and she rolls her eyes, smiling, before linking her arm with yours. bringing you to the stove.

“i was, uh —“ a pause. she does a little cough under her breath, clearing her throat. “trying to make coffee.”

silently, you look at the mess in front of you; what used to be your squeaky-clean stovetop, now stained with a muddy, rusty residue. an unassuming coffee pot sits to the side, having seemingly boiled over, smoke still drifting up into the air.

shoko cringes, a little, before a wry smile makes its way to her lips. ”it was…” she clicks her tongue. sighing softly. ”an attempt.”

”… wait.” you turn to look at her, dubiously, and she avoids your gaze. ”that’s what you burned? coffee?” still no answer. a tiny smile tugs at your lips, and you can’t help it if your voice comes out sounding a little teasing. ”how is that even possible?”

”look,” shoko exhales, heavy. ”i don’t know, okay? i think it was the coffee grounds, or something. i look away for one second, and it’s just —”

a little giggle slips from your lips, and shoko shoots you a glare. mostly harmless, but she untangles her arm from your own. ”sorry, it’s just —” you apologize, failing to hide your amusement. ”why didn’t you just use the espresso machine, honey?”

she bites her lip, and you think she might be just a little embarrassed. averting her gaze, briefly flitting towards the machine in question. ”… i didn’t know how to use it,” she mutters. ”i’ve seen you do it, obviously, but i never paid attention to the steps.”

a smile graces your lips. consoling. “it’s not that complicated once you know how it works,” you nudge her arm with your elbow. ”it just looks that way.”

she hums. a click of her tongue, as she adjusts her bra strap. ”well, anyway. i tried. so.”

”right.” you try to stifle a grin, to no avail. ”so… you burned your coffee.”

”and woke you up.” she grins, herself, just a tiny bit self-deprecating. but pretty, always, hair falling over her eyes when she tilts her head. ”a mess, aren’t i?”

”not at all.”

shoko looks at you, and your eyes meet hers. unflinchingly. tired irises falling into the gentle hue of your own, trickling down to the curve of your lips. there’s an honesty to your voice that she’s never quite been able to deal with.

(love, she thinks. a kind of love she finds somewhat hard to stomach. a sea of acceptance that she fears she’ll eventually drown in.)

before she can properly fall into a morning spiral, you stretch your neck a bit, idly, and she gets a good look at the red marks littering your skin. the way your pulse beats at the base of your throat. tender, slight, a mantra she’s grown just a little bit addicted to.

”why, though?” you hum, and shoko blinks. snapped out of her thoughts, and back into reality. back into you, the faux pout on your lips. playful, but a little confused. ”i thought i was the coffee brewer of this relationship…”

and it’s true. you’ve been making shoko’s morning cups of coffee for a while, now, even before you moved in together. she likes it black, sometimes with a drop of cream, sometimes with a cube of sugar. never both. you think it’s very like her, to tiptoe that line between bitter and sweet — never entirely giving in to one or the other. there’s a balance to shoko, something stable. something for you to hold on to, a bitter tinge or syrupy taste that always leaves you yearning for more.

truthfully, your coffee brewing skills aren’t anything special. but it makes shoko happy, to wake up and stumble into the kitchen, being able to hug your back. being handed a cup of fresh coffee. sipping from it in silence, muttering out a groggy good morning that makes your heart flutter.

(to you, it’s precious. that lilt of her voice, that bittersweet tinge. the dearest thing in the world.)

plump bottom lip trapped between her teeth, shoko furrows her brows. ever so slightly. nails tapping at the edge of the kitchen counter, a series of satisfying clicks against the marble. “… well.”

she clears her throat, but doesn’t say anything else. a moment passes. you try to find the answer in the curve of her lips, the crease of her brow, in the depths of her eyes — but you don’t succeed.

something discomforting settles in the bottom of your throat. almost uncertain, maybe a bit anxious. sheepish, as your tired mind spins in circles. parting your lips. hesitant.

“do you… not like the way i make it?” there’s a dejected tilt to your voice when it spills out, one that makes you feel a little silly. so you smile, or try to, eyes trailing towards the windows; you note that the rain has grown heavier. “i can change how —“

“what?” shoko cuts you off. “no. no, of course not — your coffee’s perfect. honestly.”

again, your eyes meet. and again, shoko seems to be struggling with finding the right words. or maybe she’s struggling to voice them.

“i just… haah.” she brings a hand up to her face, pinching the bridge of her nose. you just watch, silent, hungry to hear the thoughts she’s not letting you in on.

a beat. again, the sound of the rain against steel railings, the scent of honeydew and concrete. espresso-flavored smoke, almost entirely faded, leaving only cold air to nip at your thighs.

and again, as always, inevitably, your eyes are fixed on shoko — a moth to her flame. helpless to the cinders that ghost at your skin whenever she looks at you. a certain contemplation swims inside her eyes, simmering beneath the surface, as she chews gently at the plush of her lips. before turning to face you.

you can only blink. but shoko finally speaks, clearing her throat in a way that strikes you as rather sheepish.

“well — you’re always the one doing all the work. aren’t you?” her voice trickles out into the air, low and saccharine, a blanket pulled over your shoulders. so soft you hold your breath and strain your ears, just to make sure you hear it. “i guess i figured… i don’t know.”

shoko pauses, again, and you can almost delude yourself into thinking there’s a cherry red tint to the tips of her ears. when she parts her lips, that usually carefree voice of hers sounds almost meek. almost, but not quite. more like unsure. embarrassed?

another moment passes, entirely silent. shoko swallows her pride.

“.. satoru always brags about suguru making him those fucked up sugary drinks he likes,“ she mumbles. turning around, to rest her back against the counter, looking out at the downpour. “says it makes him feel so loved. or whatnot. so i just —“

she waves her hand, haphazardly.

“you know.“

a beat. then another. you can physically feel your lips part, a kind of surprise weaving itself into the contours of your face.

and when you finally speak, your voice comes out a little garbled, scrambling for the right words. not sure if you should feel deeply amused, or just a tiny bit horrified. “wait. you’re saying you…” a moment passes. silent, slow, and all you can do is blink owlishly. in disbelief.

“… got inspired by suguru?”

shoko groans, deep and gravelly, almost comically agonized. covering her face with her pretty hands. “don’t say it,” she pleads, “you’re making it sound as dumb as it is.”

a little giggle slips from your lips. accidental, but she still shoots you a displeased look, huffing under her breath. crossing her arms just to tap at her forearm with her nimble fingers. frowning.

“don’t laugh at me.”

“sorry,” you search for her gaze, but she keeps looking ahead. so stubborn. “i don’t mean to, ‘s just — not very like you, y’know?”

shoko exhales. nearly a huff, but not quite. and you think she must be embarrassed, gnawing at her lip like that, fingers eagerly searching for something to fidget with. it makes you soften, impeccably, the blood inside your veins warming up beneath your skin. stirring you, coaxing you into soothing her. your very own heartbeat seems to be a little enamored with shoko ieiri.

”i appreciate the thought,” you smile. a tender tone, sincere. lingering with amusement. “really. but let’s not base our entire relationship around satoru and suguru of all people, alright?”

and again, she sighs. brittle, a little fatigued. brows scrunching together. ”look, i —”

a pause. she gnaws at her plump bottom lip, eyelashes fluttering like a battered heartbeat. her voice comes out sounding soft, all duvet pillows and fresh lavender, a lilt that anchors you to earth. sweet words. so honest it makes your breath hitch.

”i want to take care of you.”

and this time, you’re the flustered one. burning under her gaze, feeling a heat blossom on your skin. feeling the fervent pitter patter of your heartbeat, as her pretty eyes look into yours. a nice mocha brown.

but even with the fresh embarrassment trickling through your veins, you find it in you to speak. desperate, maybe, to cross the distance between you — even when it borders on non-existent. desperate to feel your heartbeats synchronize, figuratively or literally. to stitch them together.

“i want to take care of you, too,” you echo, looking down at the floor. and then back at your girlfriend. hesitant, a tad shy. but sincere.

a sincerity so palpable it makes shoko feel a little jealous.

(sometimes, she finds herself wanting to put a hand inside your chest. dig around your organs, run her fingertips down every single one, until she finds what she's looking for. that miraculous something that makes you stick around, that makes you so frighteningly easy to love. that makes her want to safeguard you so terribly.)

”then let’s take care of each other,” she breathes, a small smile slipping into the curve of her lips. reaching out to brush against your knuckle, weave your fingers together. delicate.

she clears her throat. “… i guess.”

and you can’t help but smile. somewhat cheeky, a little teasing. “ah,” your eyes crinkle, and you stifle a coo. “did that embarrass you?”

a sharp little scoff. shoko gives you a lazy grin, paired with a soft roll of her eyes. brushing her thumb across your knuckles, even still. “oh, shut up.”

the world seems to still, ever so slightly, as you look into each other’s eyes. like everything else is just background noise, from the pitter patter of the rain to the fading smell of coffee all around you. shoko looks at you like she’s trying to see inside your brain, see what makes you tick, see you for what you are.

and when she eventually leans in for a kiss, you’re pliant. expectant. her lips against yours, breathing you in, as soft as ever. like she’s afraid of getting too greedy. she tastes like nectar and cosmetics.

“give me some time,” she says, after pulling back. hands on your waist, squeezing softly. “i’ll make you another cup right now.”

”sure you don’t want me to do it?” you ask. “i don’t mind.”

another little scoff. offended. ”look, i’m not incompetent, okay? i’m just not used to it.” she untangles herself from you, warmth slipping away. you will yourself not to chase it. “just stand there and look pretty for me.”

and she smiles, when those words make you giggle, infected by your sleepy joy. something soft and silky blooms inside her ribcage, mirrored by the glimmer in your eyes when you intertwine your hands again. fingertips brushing against each other, delicate, a love that’s handled with care.

”.. i like making you coffee,” you whisper after a beat. smiling. under your breath, like you’re telling her a secret. ”it makes me happy.”

a moment passes. something in shoko’s bones still, for a second, enough for you to notice. and her eyes fill with a kind of hesitance. doubt, maybe. or fear.

when shoko opens up to you, it’s always like this. sleepy, rainy days, or tipsy afternoons. in no more than a whisper, a fragile breath, the ghost of a confession. when you can feel her heartbeat, one finger on her wrist, listening to the rhythm of her pulse. intimate. a little clumsy, but…

”i just don’t want you to spend too much of yourself on me.”

the words are spoken in passing, almost casually, a lighthearted kind of resignation. a hungry ghost. one that follows her, follows you. suguru and satoru, too. there’s a lump in her throat, you can tell, something that makes it a little harder to say what she means. an intimacy that frightens her in a way nothing else can; frightened to hold it in her palms, to keep it close without having it break apart.

(not just her — you all are. all four of you. that’s why you've always been together, you think, why you always will be. four hedgehogs huddling together in the cold of night, too desperate for warmth to stay away from each other's spines.)

carefully, almost cautiously, you bring her hand to your lips. as if you’re handling a flimsy sheet of glass. featherlight, a touch so tender you hope she knows what you’re about to say before the words leave your throat.

“you’re worth it,” is whispered against her skin, your lips against her knuckles. shoko softens, but you think the sigh that slips from her lips sounds just a little shaky. “always.”

and finally, you know you aren't deluding yourself. it’s there, visible, the cherry red of her ears; a red that matches the lipstick on your skin. a flush that never travels down to her face. but it’s enough.

she clears her throat. voice beginning to change shape, slowly but surely, morning fatigue peeled off with the ticking of the clock. there’s still a raspy residue, leftover smoke that’ll never quite leave her lungs, but it’s silkier now. trickling like honey from her parted lips.

and it’s terribly soft, her tongue twisting around the vowels, a low lilt that drips with tenderness. she wills herself to smile. tired, but fond. “just let me make you one cup, then.”

so you do.

you let her, after briefly pointing out the functions of the far too expensive espresso machine that satoru bought you when you first moved in, and she listens intently. those pretty eyes, the intelligence behind them, her lips pursed in focus. shoko’s a genius, you’ve always thought — so effortlessly good at memorization, at figuring out how things work. what ties everything together.

you think it’s a little comical that she struggled so much with making coffee, of all things, but you choose to attribute it to her slight hangover.

because she’s focused, when she begins to fiddle with the machine. attentive. as if she’s dissecting it. a satisfaction in the way she moves, the way everything clicks into place as she works. everything serves a purpose, every single part in the machinery, every tube or pump of caffeine. she compares it to the human body, a glint in her eyes, and you can’t disagree.

all you can do is watch her. silently, entirely mesmerized. sitting on the kitchen counter, bare thighs against the marble, swinging your legs. telling her about the dream you had, while she listens. always.

a fresh, thick aroma of espresso and rainwater begins to waft through the apartment. one you drink in, greedy, steam filling your lungs. as you admire how the tiny droplets bounce off the hyacinths blooming on your balcony.

and when she’s finished, producing one cup of espresso, tailored to your liking, you can’t still the beating of your heart. unsure if you should blame it on the caffeine yet to enter your veins, or the proud smile that lingers on your girlfriend’s lips. maybe the way her fingers curl around the handle, the way a soft here, baby, spills from her smudged lips. all of the above, probably.

she’s gorgeous. breathtaking. sometimes you want to give her everything, more than you could live without. your heart, your lungs, your eyes. anything she asks for.

but she would never. all she’ll ever need is for you to keep sticking around, keep telling her about your silly dreams, keep letting her feel the beat of your pulse at the base of your throat. a mantra she’s fallen a little bit in love with.

and when you put your lips against the ceramic, and a bittersweet scent fills your lungs, you think you can taste it. that care, a love soft enough to mend all the jagged edges of your heart.

shoko smiles. smoothing a stray eyelash from your skin, thumb against your cheekbone. “how is it?”

(you swear it’s the best cup of coffee you’ve ever had.)

#i love!! my wife!!!!#shoko gap moe is real (and heres why)#i just think she’d be a lil softer around someone she likes . shes awkward w intimacy but she treasures u so dearly :<#dont get me wrong tho she definitely has smth Wrong w her and i love that side of her too!!#i feel like she would joke abt wanting to dissect u (but is it rly a joke 🤨🤨)#if this reader seems more whipped than usual then that is bc im projecting <33 oh to live in a cramped apartment w shoko ieiri …#to have her cover my neck and face in kiss marks…….. (dies) i literally need it SO bad u dont understand. there r tears in my eyes.#title from a clementine von radics poem that i cant remember the name of … all her poems r so shoko coded tho #shoko ieiri #shoko ieiri x reader #shoko fluff #shoko x you #shoko ieiri x you #shoko ieiri x y/n #shoko x reader #jjk fluff #jjk x you #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen #jjk x reader

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