#sometimes. using yourself as reference for characters that you love can be something so special

[abrielarnold]

"You still deserve to eat. You still deserve to laugh."

me before watching trigun: "oh people really like the priest guy, i guess."

me after watching trigun 5 times and showing my brothers a wip of this to which one said "oh. the priest guy your favourite character, huh": (ᴬᵀᵀᴬᶜᴷᴱᴰ ᴬᵀᵀᴬᶜᴷᴱᴰ ᴬᵀᵀᴬᶜᴷᴱᴰ) "the characters are really strong and well written, okay. i just really like how they all interact with each other o k a y."

[thelightsandtheroses]

One: I was just coasting until we met

Your Hand In Mine | Joel Miller x female reader

Summary: When Joel finds you on your self-assigned insomnia bench one night, it sparks an unexpected friendship that quickly develops into more. Finding peace in the middle of an apocalypse always seemed impossible, but being with Joel feels natural, like a missing piece has fallen into place at last. When a ghost from your past threatens to destroy the peace you’ve found in Jackson, everything will change.

Word Count: 2.5k

Overarching Series Warnings - 18+ blog - minors do not interact, unexpected friendship, developing relationship, idiots in love, flangst, typical TLOU content, references to cults, references to past manipulation, references to past violence, references to PTSD, single parent reader, some secondary original characters, etc. No use of Y/N, any further warnings to be added as appropriate. No specific age for reader, but range is implied in later chapters (minimum of 30s but not specified any further than that) Notes: This idea has been going around my head for months and I’m so excited to actually do something with this and share it. Also, a special thank you to the lovely @darkroastjoel for encouraging me to write this weeks ago when I wasn’t sure of the concept. The chapter title is from I’m With You by Vance Joy. 

One: I was just coasting till we met

Series List | Next

Jackson, WY, 2024

There’s nothing but stars and night sky ahead of you. If you look behind you, you can see a few sparse lights illuminating houses in Jackson, but ahead of you there are no distractions, just the trees and the sky and vastness of the world around you.

The air is cool and smells fresh; a mix of woodland, of the night. You adjust the thick woollen cardigan around your pyjama top and faded sweatpants. There’s no one around at this time of night so you haven’t made a real effort to get dressed or worry about your appearance.

You’ve come here many times before but it never fails to take you aback. The vastness, the stars, the way it makes you feel insignificant but not in a negative way. The only sounds you can hear are the insects and wind blowing through trees.

It’s peaceful, or as close to peaceful as exists these days. For a while, you could forget about the world you live in, convince yourself the last twenty years have been some sick fever dream instead.

In the two years you’ve lived in Jackson, this has become your spot. It’s where you go when you can’t sleep. It’s where you go when the past gets to you, when you either wake because of creeping nightmares and ghosts, or after hours of lying in your bed in a restless, anxious state wishing for slumber. 

You only ever come here at night. It’s as if there’s some sort of magic in place that would either ruin or remove the bench in the daytime. 

When you first came to this town, the idea of wandering around in the middle of the night seemed preposterous, downright reckless after living in Kansas QZ. 

However, one night you hit a breaking point.

You’d been lying in your bed, restless and unable to relax. Every time you thought you might finally drift into sleep, your heart would race and your throat would be so dry that you wondered if you were dying. You would become irrationally concerned you might just stop breathing if you did fall asleep at all. It was a pattern of insomnia that had followed you for years, from before Kansas and beyond. When you did finally sleep, you’d have nightmares, but most of your nights were shaped by restlessness.

That night, as you desperately tried not to wake anyone else up, hating them all for being able to sleep, you felt like you were going to finally break. You had to get out, just clear your head a little. 

You discovered the bench that night, perfectly positioned to watch the sunrise, to take in the world around you without distraction or worries.

It’s a special spot; serene and soothing. It’s your sanctuary.

 Sometimes you don’t need to come here, your record is a week and half away - an achievement you only reached a few days ago, but inevitably, and usually at least twice a week, you’ll end up back on your bench waiting for the sun to meet you and wash away your ghosts. 

There’s the crunching sound of boots on gravel behind you and you turn around cautiously, one hand clinging to the edge of the bench. You’ve been complacent, you chastise yourself, you don’t even have a weapon with you.

Joel Miller stands before you; a battered brown coat buttoned up to his neck, torch in one hand, with the other jammed into a jacket pocket, and a bemused expression on his face when he sees you sitting there.

You’ve heard enough of him from the other locals since his arrival; he’s Tommy’s older brother, Maria isn’t sure of him, he settled here with a teenage ward a couple of months ago. Some of the other locals have said Ellie, the girl, is almost feral. Your impression of her from fleeting visits to the library is that she’s curious, she’s haunted, not used to a community like Jackson (and these days, who would be?) and perhaps the most honest person you’ve met in years. 

”May I?” he asks, indicating the empty space on the bench next to you. You almost want to laugh at the Southern lilt to his voice, the polite manners he’s showing you. 

‘May I?’ is not a phrase that belongs in this world anymore. People take, some people give, but most take. When the world ends, manners fade. When the world ends, you ask for forgiveness and not permission. 

It’s why your instinct is to say no, to say ‘Actually fuck you, Tommy’s brother, and go find another insomnia bench, this one is mine!’

You don’t do that though. Jackson brings back those manners, or it’s trying to at least. And even if you think it belongs to you, technically it’s not your bench because this is a stupid commune. 

So you grimace and nod, frustrated about the interruption as Joel Miller sits next to you. 

It’s the first time you’ve had a chance to look at Tommy’s brother this closely.  While you can see the familial similarities, Joel’s different. His greying dark hair is far shorter, almost messy at the moment like he’s just woken up and walked here. It’s almost endearing.

There’s a scar on the right side of his temple, the one closest to you, and you try and take in every detail of him, to analyse and evaluate just who this person next to you could be. 

You expect to feel uncomfortable at his presence, to feel on edge and ready to flee or pounce, but you don’t.  

“It’s uh, a good view from here,” Joel says after a moment. 

You nod noncommittally and clasp your hands together on your lap. 

“I’ve seen you around Jackson. I’m Joel,” he continues. His voice is surprisingly soft, gentle as though he wants to put you at ease. It shows a level of consideration you didn’t expect, one that makes you more honest in your reply.

“It’s a small town, I know who you are, Joel Miller.” 

“Oh really?” he asks, cocking an eyebrow and for a second something else flashes across his face. “What have you been told about me then?”

“You’re new, you’re Tommy’s brother. I think that’s about it. Heard you and Tommy are good on patrol.” 

“Oh yeah?” Unlike most of the men in Jackson, he doesn’t seem to puff with pride at that compliment. He looks at his hands, wringing them together then before asking, “So, that’s me. What about you then? What’s your name?”

You introduce yourself, taking in the way he repeats your name - how it sounds on his lips.

“I haven’t seen you around town much before,” he says after a moment.

“Would you have even noticed?”

“Someone like you? Most definitely.” You look at the ground in surprise, certain that you’re misinterpreting his words. 

He’s just being polite.

It’s just the insomnia. 

“It is a good view. You’re right,” you say quietly, keen to shift the conversation away from yourself and back to this moment. “It’s a really great spot for the sunrise.”

“I know,” he says calmly.

You pause. Has Joel Miller been using your bench when you haven’t? Is your bench essentially cheating on you?  You’ve always believed this was your secret, your place, but perhaps it’s a timeshare instead.

For some reason, the thought of that upsets you more than you expect.  You try and shake it off though, to be polite and good and everything someone who lives in Jackson is expected to be.

Perhaps you can share the bench … today. Just for today.

“How are you liking Jackson so far then?” you ask.

Joel scoffs quietly to himself and you look over with raised eyebrows. 

“Been asked that a few times already, huh?”

“You could say that.”

“Why am I not surprised? Well, we don’t get that many new arrivals and you’re Tommy’s brother. People were bound to talk. They’ll settle down when something else comes along.”

“‘S been weeks now. Besides, I thought you just said you don’t get many newcomers, how long exactly is this going to last?” he asks, leaning forward for a moment, his arms crossed on his knees and head down.

You smile to yourself, wondering if you should admit how long it took for people to stop asking your group how you were liking Jackson, how long it has really taken to be seen as a resident and not a new arrival. 

“Well, there’s a new litter of puppies due soon, and I heard a rumour that there’s going to be another dance again in the next few weeks. Your arrival will become old news before you know it,” you say with false sincerity.

He chuckles to himself. “This really is like a small town, huh? That uh, -“

“Nosiness? Lack of privacy? Gossip mill?”

“All of the above. So, you think puppies will help?”

“Everyone loves puppies, Joel Miller. Probably even you do.”

He smirks. “Really, do I look like that to you?” There’s a teasing tone to his voice, mischief in what you can make out of his eyes in the dim light. 

“Sure you do.”

“So we’ve just got to wait for a bunch of puppies or some town dance for me an’ Ellie to be old news? Okay, here’s hoping.”

A silence falls between you but unlike before, it feels companionable, calming even. 

“So, you said ‘I know’ when I said it was a good spot for the sunrise. Does that mean you’ve been out here before then?” you ask as your curiosity finally wins out. 

Joel looks over at you with a smirk, “Why, is that really bothering you, huh? A couple of times, sure.” He shifts his weight slightly, places an arm on the bench and turns himself so he’s facing you.

“I just haven’t seen you out here before, that’s all.”

“You come out here at this hour a lot?” Joel raises an eyebrow that you can’t tell whether conveys being impressed or incredulous.

“Sometimes,” you say lightly. Most times.

“How long have you been out here then?” Joel asks.

“On this bench? About an hour. In Jackson? Two years, give or take.”

 “An’ how are you likin’ Jackson so far?” he asks, a mischievous spark in his eyes that even in the dim light takes years off him, makes him look lighter. 

You laugh before you can stop yourself. 

“Touché, Joel.”

“Couldn’t resist.”

“Do you know what? Honestly, I didn’t believe it at first,” you say after a moment. “Places like this - they don’t work, okay? Someone always wants to be in control, power abhors a vacuum and then power corrupts, right? We were watching that play out before cordyceps, and if I’ve learned anything these last twenty years …  so when we got here, I didn’t want to stick around too long. I guess that I kept waiting for the other shoe to drop? Only now, now I’m still here and I guess this place, maybe it just works. It shouldn’t, but it does.”

You’re not sure what makes the truth spill out of you like that. Perhaps it’s because it’s the middle of the night, or it’s the power of the bench, or more likely, it’s because you know Joel is probably out here for a similar reason to you. 

You can see it in his eyes, in the way he’s sitting. 

“That’s what my - my - I’ve heard that before.  That this place actually works,” Joel says. “I know what you mean though. You see enough of all that in the QZs. Is that where you were before here?”

“Before Jackson, I was in Kansas for a while.” 

“Oh.” 

“Huh, I take it you’ve heard the stories then?” 

Kansas had a reputation amongst all the remaining QZs. FEDRA had been brutal there; ruled the city with an iron fist and realised every nightmare of a brutal regime.

 It was no surprise the fireflies had been so present there at one point, the symbol of hope and rising up against tyranny. Only they had abandoned Kansas years ago and it was down to those who stayed to try and fight back. You remembered Michael, who had tried to lead a movement against FEDRA, a man who was working towards a peaceful rebellion, as if such a thing could exist.  The QZ had gone dark months ago though. It didn’t bode well and you’d heard the whispers that perhaps Kansas was no more. 

“I uh - passed through on my way here.” Joel shifts awkwardly.

“It’s gone, isn’t it?”

Joel pauses and regards you carefully before he replies.“Yeah.”

“I take it that FEDRA and Michael’s group just - it doesn’t matter actually.” They’re all dead anyway, you think, the facts won’t change that.  

Flashes of years pass you. 

Violence. So much violence. Then those moments between, the ones that managed to burrow and bury themselves beneath your skin.

Your ex-boyfriend and you kissing in the kitchen of your crappy apartment  …

Your birthday - singing to that cheesy rock song in the living room and dancing to an old song with Sean and his sister.

Marking Gabriel’s height each birthday on the kitchen wall because it felt like a normal thing to do, a new line each year, each growth spurt measured.

Your ex-boyfriend and you arguing over the system, over the possibilities for Kansas. You wonder how long he lasted after you left Kansas - if he was there for its end.

Separations … losses …  too many deaths … pockets of hope and continued disappointments.

You okay?” Joel asks, a reluctant expression on his face.

“I’m fine. Left there for a reason.”

“Right.”

“It’s fine.”

Kansas had never really been home. You can’t make a home in a place you’re constantly on alert in, where you subsist on fear and anxiety. You could exist there though and at least in Kansas it was clear who was running the show, clear who was in charge. 

Jackson is the closest to a home you’ve found in more than twenty years, and even here you feel halfway out of the door. 

Joel’s still looking at you though, his brow furrowed like you’re a map he can’t read, an unfathomable equation.

You shrug and resume staring ahead at the forest ahead, at letting every sound, smell and sound around you just soak in, to create an illusion of peace.

After a while you steal a glance at Joel. He’s still on the other side of the bench; the hand on the arm leaning on the bench now pinching the space behind his brows, his eyes momentarily shut.

You’re not sure exactly how much time passes like this but soon the darkness fades and dawn rises to greet you with the promise of a new day.

You stand up, brushing imaginary dirt off your clothes and meet Joel’s gaze. “See you around, Joel Miller.”

“See you,” he replies lightly.

As you walk down the hill, you turn around and notice Joel’s still sitting there, focused on the horizon ahead.

This isn’t going to be the only time you find Joel on your bench, you realise. Suddenly, your lonely but peaceful sanctuary has an addition. You know the two of you will find yourselves on this bench again in the middle of the night.

If you hadn’t spoken to Joel, the loss of that solitude would be devastating, but it’s not. 

 So, you think to yourself, it turns out you’re not the only insomniac wanderer in Jackson.

Tag List

YHIM: @orcasoul @pedropascalsbbg @yoursoulsunbreakable @iamskyereads @genetics4life @everyth1ngfan @frickatives @perennialdoll247

Everything Pedro tag-list: @harriedandharassed @pedrostories @hiroikegawa @pedrosaidsheispunk

If you want to be added to (or removed from) one of the tag lists, let me know or you can get notifications for @thelightsandtheroses-fics if you prefer. If you do not have an age or age range showing you are over 18, I will not add you to this list. I block ageless and blank blogs.

[mrghostrat]

I remember you posting a blurred gif of the outline of atws, so if you don't mind me asking, how do you do that? Like, get the outline onto paper and not just scenes in your head. That's something I've always struggled with, because it's hard to write without an outline, but hard to do the outline when I don't have a first draft? I'm not sure how to explain it so I hope this makes any sense at all lmao

ahh so fair! some people just don't operate that way and you gotta do what's best for your brain. no point exhausting all your energy trying to squeeze into a "standard writing process" that'll make writing even more difficult for yourself.

under the cut, i'm going to explain my writing process every step of the way, using scenes of ATWS. i hope it helps in some way? i don't think it's anything special, but this is just how i write to appease my adhd.

first, this might help: i once used storyplanner.com when i didn't know how to even start a story and i loved it. it's a great tool that can hold your hand every step of the way, or just prompt you to think on your own. there's over 20 planners that ask different questions like "what's your character's major flaw?" "what's the inciting incident?" "what outside elements hinder the character?" etc that will present you with a complete story structure when you're done with it.

ok, now, how i write:

as for the post in reference, that's the 2nd stage of my writing process. i get carried away with tangents and hone in on details, so i plan in dot points to try and force myself to keep it simple and stay zoomed out.

i just write what happens in chronological order, and if i have an idea for a later scene (or something that i just want to happen, but don't know when/where/how), i note that in a separate document that i can refer to while i plan. this also allows me to gloss over vague sections to keep my writing flow going.

stage 1:

i've started using Notion's "toggle list" feature to minimise the less important parts of a scene and keep myself focused on the overarching plot during this stage. this is what the first point looks like:

i go beat by beat, essentially amounting to an elevator pitch for each stage of my story. "crowley and aziraphale are streamer roommates" + "people start to notice they each live with someone and the speculation starts" + "crowley and aziraphale interact on twitch" + "they attend the edinburgh meetup" etc.

i finish a story before i move on from this stage. i won't start writing something in earnest until i know how it ends.

stage 2:

this is what you saw in my gif, and why that page was so long. that's every scene i'm going to write in the story.

sometimes i jump straight from stage 1 to writing, but ATWS required a lot more figuring out before i started any kind of prose. here i'm basically noting down the details of what each scene is, the brunt of what's happening. this is when i have to figure out those "vague sections" i glossed over earlier.

it's still just intended to be a rough outline so i know where the characters are and what's moving their relationship along. most of these dot points are short because i've already thought about them a thousand times, and may have more details noted down in a different document.

meanwhile some of them i'm planning out the scene as i'm dotting it, making not of dialogue that i want to include.

stage 3: my bracket method

i only use this stage when i'm struggling to write and need to baby step into it. this is my "bracket method" in which i write the scene without, like... caring? some people may consider this "double handling" which may drive you mad, but it's the most helpful thing i've ever done for my process.

i switch tenses, i write how i chat (no capitals etc) and just word vomit the scene without focusing on prose. ATWS came quite easily at first, and i didn't need to use stage 3 until i got to chapter 4 and hadn't written in a few days.

stage 4:

this is writing the actual prose, but i wanted to include it so you can see the differences, to help better understand my notes/planning/outlining stages:

and this is what a scene looks like with stage three bridging the gap:

[hisui-dreamer]

could you possibly do some headcanons of some twst boys of your choice with a skinny reader?? if not its fine lol

his unconditional acceptance

Characters: Deuce, Azul, Epel, Silver

Synopsis: How does your lover treat you if you're insecure about being skinny?

Tags: reader is skinny, fluff, comfort, bot proofread

Word count: 936

Notes: Thanks for asking! I took this as a 'insecure about being skinny' sort of reader bc some of my friends are like that and I have more references hehe. Also gentle reminder that all body types are equally lovable and there's no need to change anything as long as you're comfortable! Variety in people exist and that's what makes people special <3

Part 2 ✧ Masterlist

Deuce finds it a bit confusing that you would be insecure

he thinks you’re absolutely perfect and he’s still surprised you like him!

but without a doubt, he’s very supportive of you

he values hard work and self-improvement, so he understands the struggles of insecurity and would want to help you overcome them in any way he can

he can be a bit blunt at times but it’s always laced with genuine care and concern for your well-being

provides reassurance and encouragement, and incredibly patient in helping you build self-confidence

constantly reminds you that you are valued and loved just the way you are

his lack of tact and slip-ups may sometimes unintentionally hurt your feelings

but he’s super quick to apologize and make amends, please don’t be upset!

invites to go jogging with him so you can exercise some, and automatically matches his pace with yours

 gets you water and towels the instant you need it

he tries super hard to support you in whatever way he can

is also super willing to beat anyone up who dares comment on something they shouldn’t have

Deuce’s cheeks are flushed as he tries to meet your gaze. "Remember that you are so much stronger than you think. You have overcome challenges before, and you have the resilience to overcome these insecurities too. I'll be here to cheer you on every step of the way." He smiles genuinely, fiddling with his hair.

Azul loves you for who you are beyond your physical appearance

as someone who has struggled with his own self-esteem and acceptance of his body, he’s more sensitive about body image and is surprisingly empathetic (for a scammy businessman) towards others who also face body-related challenges

he feels a bit self-conscious about his own appearance in comparison to you at first

but he strives to be supportive, understanding, and accepting of your body size

he knows firsthand how hurtful it can be to be judged or bullied for you appearance

he puts his silver tongue to use and showers you with compliments and gifts so often you won’t have time to doubt yourself

hugs you and whispers words of affection in your ears

he won’t stop until you accept them

this man is willing to go to great lengths to please you and make you happy

loves getting you snacks whenever you feel hungry

and indulges you on any food cravings

also sometimes sends the leech twins to check up on you to see if you’ve eaten

"Oh Angelfish," Azul says as he pulls you into a comforting hug."You are deserving of love and acceptance, regardless of your size or appearance. You are so much more than your physical body, and I admire you for who you are on the inside."

Epel empathises with you a lot

he is more understanding and supportive towards your insecurities

he knows firsthand how it feels to be dissatisfied with your own body

makes you so many apple treats so you can munch on them whenever you’re hungry

he tries to boost your confidence by offering words of encouragement and reassurance

he doesn’t like showing you his weak side, but sometimes he shares his own struggles and how he has learned to cope with them

he will rant to you a lot about vil

it’s a team effort of growing to be comfortable in your own skin

you learn together to focus on their strengths and accomplishments

the two of you set realistic goals for self-improvement on daily habits together

it’s a cute relationship where you both learn and grow

listens patiently and offers gentle words of affirmation

loves giving hugs, holding hands, or just gentle physical reassurance

he’s so happy that you can find comfort in him

also tries to eat most of his meals with you so he can make sure you’re eating properly

Epel clutches both of your hands, his eyes firmly on yours. "I know it's hard when ya wanna change things 'bout yourself, but remember, you're my sweetheart, and I love ya just the way ya are. I wouldn't change a thing about ya. You're special and unique, and that's what makes ya truly beautiful in my eyes!" he exclaims.

Silver's super supportive of anything you do

make efforts to reassure you and boost your self-esteem, showing kindness and empathy towards your concerns

always listens to you talk about your worries attentively no matter how trivial it is

offers words of encouragement and tries taking actions to help you

this man tries super hard to fight off his sleep for you

when he does eventually fall asleep, his first thoughts are you and how you’re faring

takes on a role of being a protector and supporter for you, always trying to make you feel safe and secure in their relationship

he is patient and understanding towards your insecurities given his serious and reserved demeanour

patient and understanding, never rushing or pressuring you to change or be someone you’re not

accepts your insecurities and helps working towards building your confidence at your own pace

he’s your knight after all, he would definitely go above and beyond to ensure your well-being, both physically and emotionally

becomes more assertive in addressing any negative influences or situations that could affect your self-esteem

Silver knelt to the ground, placing his lips on your hand. "I am here to support you, my love, through thick and thin. Your size or shape does not matter to me, for it is your heart and soul that have captured mine," he promises as he looks up at you, his eyes full of love.

if you liked this post, don't forget to reblog!

Part 2 ✧ Masterlist

[getvalentined]

I'm gonna say something really important here that was inspired by one specific event but applies to several others I've seen over the last few years. This is not vagueblogging to call someone out, this is a pattern I've seen a few times now that I'm genuinely concerned about.

If a series, whether books or television or films or video games, is so all-consuming in your life that a new installment going in a different direction from what you want is enough to make you have an emotional breakdown, you need to unplug from that series. If you sincerely refer to characters in this series as "[your] people" or "the love of [your] life" or "[your] family," not as a figure of speech but as something so genuine that having them handled in ways contrary to your preference makes you feel like your way of life is under attack, you need to distance yourself from those characters.

I'm saying this as someone who literally can't get into fandom debates anymore because I get so wrapped up that my heart rate spikes to the point of danger to my person. Because of a specific experience with a specific person (related to events outside fandom, but triggers are triggers) I have a very real trauma response to these discussions, and I can't engage with them anymore. I'm not saying this as "it's just a show calm down" or "why do you care so much about a video game" or as any kind of insult or passive aggression; I'm saying this as someone who understands firsthand that feelings get caught in specific places, and sometimes we just can't seem to pull them loose.

If you feel like this over a work of fiction, you need to get help, because there is something wrong. Something in your head and your heart has gotten caught on this work of fiction, and you need to pull it loose for your own wellbeing, but when it's gone that far it's all but impossible to do on your own.

I need to be very clear that I'm not talking about special interests or hyperfixations. I'm not talking about people who throw their lives into loving a specific thing, learning everything about that thing, expressing their interest in that thing, and so on. There's a line between passion and obsession, and a difference between what appears to be an obsession but is harmless and what appears to be passion but is an unhealthy level of obsession.

It's easy for those of us on the outside to write this kind of behavior off as just more entitled fans being entitled, but there's a point where what looks like entitlement exposes itself as something very different, something much more dangerous. If you're feeling this way—you need distance and assistance. If you're seeing friends behave this way—they need help, not rallying cries to "speak [their] truth."

I cannot express this strongly enough. No fictional character, no fictional story, no fandom is worth your health. Not one. Period. You are a real human being who deserves to be alive and safe and happy. The creators of a work of fiction are not attacking you or belittling your efforts by continuing to create within the boundaries of the fictional universe they created.

To put it as simply as I can:

If a work of fiction that you did not create existing in a state that you can't control is seriously damaging your mental and emotional wellbeing, you need to step away.

[solaroppositesyaoi]

Hold on ,,, i kinda fell out of the fandom a while ago

Is Tervo canon now?? Like... earnest canon? Not just in that limbo between homophobic jokes and queerbaiting but like... Actual committed, loving relationship that they're both working on and they don't just sometimes kiss for laughs?

Because in that case i might start watching again

(I fell off just before the christmas special)

OH BOY ANON YOU JUST ACTIVATED MY AUTISM

So the short answer is yes though not 100% and I understand if that’s not what you’re looking for but if you have time you can listen to me go off:

So they pretty much do everything except stare directly at the audience and announce that their in a relationship but the show pretty much tells us they’re in relationship

We’ll start with the Christmas Special since you stopped there.

There’s only one “tervo” scene where Terry reveals he’s been practicing punching for Korvo’s Christmas present and they share a kiss which is the best kiss we’ve gotten from them.

It’s very sweet

Now onto s3

I’m linking my own video if you want to watch the scenes yourself but don’t worry I’m gonna break into them: link to video

There’s a lot of little things through out the season the word “husband” is thrown around a lot, in episode 2 Terry refers to Korvo as babe a personal fave of mine. There’s also huge implications they’re having sex with each other which you know helps.

The main episodes with the biggest Tervo moments are episode 3 The Pupas Big Day and episode 8 The Cubic Lattice Crystallizer

The Pupa’s Big Day features jealous Korvo in the best possible way (this is my personally favorite episode in the series by the way)

I don’t want to ruin the episodes for you but Terry is buddy buddy with a new character and it drives Korvo crazy. In the end the episode ends with with this line:

Tervo for the soul

The Cubic Lattice Crystallizer starts well with this:

After the fam goes on vacation and a few shenanigans happens until Terry and Korvo end up a museum of betrayals which features an animatronic of Korvo getting banged by Chris the red goobler

This sets off Terry who shows quite a bit a jealousy from the situation I’m not going to show it cause of tumblr’s nsfw rules but the animatronic says something along the lines

“I’m coming harder than I do with Terry”

The final scene I want to talk about come from the season finale The Fog of Pupa. Ms. Frankie reveals the cunnilingus Korvo gave her in the s2 finale and Terry give him this look:

It’s just screams Terry’s pissed at Korvo for this but why would he be if they weren’t in a relationship??

Outside that we have the Halloween special where it’s revealed Korvo gave Terry bj coupons for Valentines Day

Cute

Also found this excerpt article with Mike McMahan (here’s a link for the entire article)

In the s4 preview (youtube link) Terry pretty much is the sole reason Korvo is British now because it made him horny, he also calls Korvo sweetie in the clip.

We also have a Valentines episode to look forward too which a lot of people are speculating a tervo wedding as “something big” is suppose to happen to two characters hmmm…..

So are they in a relationship? I like to think so but I’m also autistic and a little insane and I eat up all the scraps they give me. Maybe I’m delusional but i feel there’s a ton of evidence here. If you think this is just queerbait material I understand but I think it’s pretty clear they’re in love with each other. Either way I can't wait for s4 and more tervo content for me to tear into and analyze the death.

Anyway thanks for sticking with me here and I hope this answered your question!

[swollenbabyfat]

so maybe this is too out there of a question but you seem to draw a lot so i was wondering.... how? asking from a place where I used to draw a ton but had a burnout from it that i don't think i ever really recovered from, now im barely drawing and i feel like my skills are decaying but i just can't get myself to draw, and when i do i can't make anything i like and i just get frustrated ): i want to draw, i still have that urge in me to draw but i just. can't. do you have any advice? if not you can just ignore this ask.

Hmm....I will try my best to give a few ideas to help! But ultimately, I don't have a lot of interest outside of drawing to be honest (to the point I can argue in the past it's been unhealthy), I think a lot of it has to do with being autistic and it being my special interest, and I've always had a pretty high stamina from it, so I'm kind of bad to be compared to in a way I think ^^;

A few things though

-I have projects I work on, even if loosely, basically at all times. I consider my characters stories projects, and do a lot of work surrounding them outside of art that fuels the art - such as making mood boards, writing and talking about them, making playlist, stuff like that.

-If I feel burnt out in one area of art, i.e. character illustrations, I try to do something different, such as background focused work, or doing something outside of what I would normally do, like collage.

-I'm a really big advocate for studies to get out of burn out, and it's most likely what I will do to get out of one myself. Switching mindsets keeps things from getting monotonous, and can put your brain into a different gear which makes it easier to be creative in what you want it to be. Timed figure drawings can also be fun once you break through the "oh god I'm shit at this" feelings when you first start doing them.

-Drawing for others can be really nice sometimes, whether it be through art trades or drawing shit for your loved ones. I tend to do the latter one the most when I feel burnt out from my own work, and like to talk about their oc's a lot anyways, so it's fun to get to know their characters more through art. I use to also do art parties with my friends and do things like switching canvases every ten minutes, all working on one prompt but doing our own thing, stuff like that. In a similar vein, sometimes asking your friends for prompts can be helpful, think of it as an assignment of sorts if that works for you!

-Figure out WHAT you want to draw before you sit down and draw it. There's a lot of different ways to do this, a lot of time if I feel stuck unable to do work I'll look for visual references and make a mood board, or think about themes I've been wanting to explore and ponder on that for some times, a lot of times pieces will sit in my head for a month or so before I actually tackle them. Sometimes I'll go to my inspiration blog and hit the random button a few times and take the images I get from that and try to build something with it. If you feel stuck on a certain part of a piece, break it down further by doing a study of what's getting you stuck (if it has to do with form, I suggest tracing said thing and then practice drawing it yourself afterwards).

Overall, please don't beat yourself up, artist go through cycles of growth and slumber and sometimes you just have to rest, especially if you have outside factors making it hard for you to focus on drawing. It takes a lot for art skills to degrade and even if it were to be the case there's a lot of beauty in picking back up a skill, and sometimes you can even learn it better the second time.

I hope any of this was helpful, I'm rooting for you!

[pedges-world]

A Very Special Episode of PB and J

And now for a very special episode of PB and J. This one is drastically self-indulgent, though I feel there are some things Pedge and I can say to the fandom that might help. 

Sexy Disclaimer: Pedge is not a registered therapist, however therapeutic he might be. We are going to be talking about some challenging topics like SH, ideation, orientation, violence and shame…

Pedge and I have been talking a lot about shame and allowance lately, haven’t we Pedge? I know, it’s hard to sit with uncomfortable emotions no matter how many chocolate chip cookies we have. It’s easy to feel broken or like there’s something wrong with you. Hmmm? I mean, it’s only 11:30am but…yes we can have some for breakfast.

This first writing year on Tumblr I’ve learned A LOT. I spent a full year reading ALL KINDS of fics and some of them had me feeling all sorts of things! I read fluff, I read violence, I read about threesomes, I read about orientation, I read about SH, ideation, dead dove…

Sorry, Pedge has his fingers in his ears and is singing “Purple Rain” right now, just in case. Maybe I should whisper a little…I’m just gonna give a little reminder that trigger warnings are there for a reason. You just protect yourself like Pedge does, and if you don’t like something, block it! I saw some scary pics last night I just blocked that ish straight away, no thank you! 

But sometimes I have a tendency to “block” myself, and that’s something my REAL therapist and I have been working on. What? No Pedge, I’m sorry the time that we spend together is very therapeutic, but it’s also important to speak with a professional. No, she doesn’t make chocolate chip cookies the way you do, and yes I would like some Almond Milk.

Anyways, sometimes I feel silly or embarrassed or guilty about the things that I like. Do you ever feel that way? I worry that a playful cartoon like Pedge might appear childish or misrepresent some of the adult topics we address. I’ve started describing myself as a sexy ace, but that label doesn’t really fit. Pedge is running to get his Pride Flag from June, thank you for the support, P. I love fics that explore orientation and different types of love. Yes, Pedge I LOVED the work you did in “A Strange Way of Life”. I mean…that was hawt, and I’m not just talking about the oven right now.

I like unpacking fics that involve violence. I’m not 100% why, but I feel safe within myself to explore those feelings, particularly in a fictional environment and not a real one. Yes Pedge, I DID watch TLOU and that hospital scene was VERY believable. No, I don’t know if Laurence Olivier liked chocolate chip cookies, but I’m sure he would have liked you. This October we’re going to explore some Halloween fics with some of your SUPER scary characters like Dave York and Max Phillips. Pedge, you know I can still see you even when you’re hiding underneath the covers, right? Okay, you just let me know if we overstimulate ourselves, okay? Maybe we’ll read those during the daytime…

Pedge, did you know sometimes I even feel embarrassed about writing? (Ahem) alright, you don’t have to laugh about it, silly goose. I often refer to you as Pedge or P, because you’re an avatar. No, not the movie. Yes, I know it’s a classic. An avatar is an icon or figure that represents a REAL figure like Pedro Pascal.

Oh honey, I’m sorry, no you are VERY real. How could you eat so many cookies if you weren’t real? Oh cuddle bug…okay you just nestle up in here for a hug, I’m sorry I made you cry. All I mean to say is that thoughts and feelings and desires are VERY real, and sometimes giving them a name or an image can help us sort through the complicated parts of ourselves! And it can mean whatever we want. It doesn’t mean we’re delusional, or violent or bad, it just means that we’re human. And humans use art to understand themselves and life.

Yes, and cookies. We also enjoy cookies and movies and museums and pleasure and all kinds of things that don’t need an explanation, they just get to be enjoyed, much like the fandom.

Sigh. No we’re not broken, we’re just human. Well, some of us are human and some of us are avatars, but we both need Love. And cookies. They’re ready? Okay good, this existential and literary crisis has made me very hungry. When in doubt, try to remember that feelings and thoughts are neutral, it’s what you DO with those emotions that defines their meaning and external impact.

In closing, Pedge and I just want you to know how much we like you. You’re good. You’re not bad. Okay, you’re not PERFECT. You’re just you, and we like that. Keep doing your best! Keep exploring, keep learning, keep growing, keep wanting! And if there are some emotions that feel too big even for cookies to handle, think about getting your own therapist, like me! Pedge is currently occupied, so you’ll have to get your own. Mostly, just be good to yourself and be good to others. And remember that sometimes a cookie is just a cookie. Yes, Pedge, you’ve done an extraordinary job with this batch, I must say. Yes Pedge. I love you too.

*thanks @thecutestgrotto for the dividers!

[angryducktimemachine]

Hi Ed!

I really really love your drawings, specially the ones with holmes and your penciled ones. I hope it’s not to bold/rude of me to say but I’d love to draw like you, do you have any tips on where to start? I have some basics from forever ago but I very rusty on my abilities. Should I draw using references? A particular tutorial on YouTube? Something entirely different?

With love, from a fan of yours

Well first step you want to be a 11 year old that gets absolutely obsessed with Warrior Cats-

Ok jokes aside (and thank you very much first!!) I'll see what actual advice I can give you! My approach to art is not really actively focused on improving (as I do not want to do this as my job and so just take the motivation to practice something specific as it comes.) but I'll try and recall what has helped me over the years.

Using references is definitely a very useful thing, I'm currently trying to use them more when it comes to drawing fabric but they're useful for all sorts of things. what I did and do personally as well is just. Watching people. Trying to figure out how the movement of a body works, the way arms can bend or legs are stretched. This works both with your own body (sometimes I just stand in front of a mirror trying to see how my arm bends over my head to get a feeling for it's movement.) and just observing people in day to day life! I find this technique easier than "static" photo references cause I get a better feeling of the body but they can both be useful.

I never really watched YouTube tutorials however what I did watch is hours and hours and hours of speedpaints - i think they're really fun if you are looking for different tricks and techniques to try, the way this artist does linework vs how this one colours- i have a few up myself.

Third, if you're anything like me and thrive on compliments; get yourself a buddy who's as hyped about your own art as you are. I feel like this helps with both inspiration and motivation, most of the time when I had art, be it when i was still drawing cats or Star Wars OCs to now drawing Sherlock Holmes - I also had a friend who was currently into the same things I was - or even better, was actively creating characters and stories with me which gave me lots of ideas to draw.

Oh also a little side note if you ever find yourself frustrated with your art or struggle to find inspiration, it often helps me to switch things up a bit, do something different. Get out actual paint. Try (and fail, in my case) to carve something. Paint a wall. Learn origami. Do something with model clay. Convince yourself that you can sew anything if you just tried hard enough.

I hope at least a few of those things are useful - explaining how I got here art wise is a bit difficult cause I mainly just picked up a pen and then just never stopped. But art starts somewhere for us all and I hope you can find joy in creating!!

[live-from-flaturn]

Number 25: Wrapping arms around them when they make breakfast. Bonus points if whoever's cooking is terrible at it.

somehow this thing started off with vaguely horny vibes and then, as per usual, veered directly into character study territory and got sickeningly soft. thanks for the lovely prompt, darlin'!

tw: references to Korn in passing

wordcount: approx. 700

Title: "Tasting Sunrise"

Chay slips his arms around Kim’s waist and hooks his chin over his boyfriend’s shoulder. He watches as Thailand’s current indie sweetheart and rising star stirs wayyyyyy too much chili paste into the soup he’s making. “Whatcha doing, Phi?”

“What does it look like?” Kim sniffs. “I’m making us breakfast.”

“Are you secretly trying to kill me and collect my hefty life insurance policy?” 

“Wh– Why would you ask that?!” Kim spins around in his arms, looking so completely horrified that, for a split-second, Porchay feels kinda bad… 

Then he takes in the ‘Fuck You, it’s MY Kitchen’ apron (which Tankhun had special-ordered when Kim nearly burned down the house last summer making grilled cheese), Kim’s untouched bedhead, and his own rumpled Wik tee covering Kim’s chest. A smile blooms softly across his face. There’s no urgency in the gesture, no driving need to ease Kim’s worry – because Kim is already calm again. One look is all it takes now that they’ve learned how real communication works.

“That’s a lot of chili, P’Kim.” Chay noses along the hinge of Kim’s jaw until Kim finally relaxes back against him and exposes his neck for more. “Are you feeling congested, or did I snore last night and you’re trying to fix the problem with folk medicine?”

“Is it really that much?” Kim blinks at him innocently. Chay still can't believe that for all his ferality, all his killing and maiming and committing violent crimes on a near-weekly basis, Kim has no fucking clue how to read recipes. Something about cooking simply doesn't click; and that's fine with Chay, because cooking is his happy place. 

Therapy rocks and he’ll always be grateful for his access to solid mental healthcare – but sometimes, in the quiet of their kitchen, nothing soothes him faster or better than slicing up vegetables and mixing the correct ratio of seasonings into his broth base. He makes Kim a variety of healthy food and takes great pride in doing so.

“I love you so much, P’Kim… But there’s a reason I make breakfast when we have the time to eat together.” 

Kim pouts cutely up at him in disappointment so Chay smacks a kiss to his forehead. Totally fair compensation, in his opinion. “How about we go out for food, instead? There’s a new crepe place down the block that looks awesome and the reviews are good.”

“I like crepes.”

“Precisely my point.”

“Alright,” Kim smiles and turns off the stove. Chay follows him into the bedroom, pinching at his hips to keep them from getting distracted on the way. 

“Thank you for taking care of me,” Chay whispers, just before they leave the apartment. He takes one of Kim’s hands in both of his and presses several kisses along the ridge of Kim's knuckles. “But please don’t push yourself to do things that make you uncomfortable for my sake. We both make up each other’s slack, right?”

Kim looks apprehensive at this request. Wary. Almost as if he's been cornered. 

Chay wonders darkly if he’s been to visit Korn in the last twenty-four hours.  

“I make us healthy, tasty dinners and sometimes breakfast. You check the deadbolts every night and keep a holster under your bedside table,” Chay ticks the items off on his fingers as if he’s making a numbered list. Mostly he wants Kim to understand his point. Kim nods along, so he continues:

“I keep track of our toiletries and resupply when we’re at the store. You have a cool sixth sense about when we’re low on coffee beans, so we never run out. Cats come up to me on the street so we can both pet them. Your fans take candids of us petting cats together on the street and post them online for me to collect. We’re symbiotic, Kim. Not like Venom, I mean, but like two separate people who fit very well together.”

Kim pops onto his toes in order to bestow a pleased kiss to Chay’s lips. Chay can feel Kim's smile beneath the pressure of skin meeting skin and it makes him smile right back. 

When they pull back for air, Kim gasps, “I love you, sunshine.”

“I love you, too, Phi.”

“Breakfast?”

“Breakfast.”

The crepes, while delicious, don't hold a candle to the taste of Kim's early morning smile.

[jeongyunhoed]

As seen on my FF.net Also seen on my Ao3

Following the events of fifth year, a new adventure awaits for Norah Lee. Boys, exams, school events, common room parties, and old foes outside of Hogwarts. Even battling pensieve guardians was easier than this.

Main Pair: OC/? Genre: Adventure/Angst/Fluff (it's a little of everything, tbh)

KEEP IN MIND: Characters are aged up (even if the story's got them in sixth year) to make it more appropriate. Time period is leaning towards the modern day so in case you might find anachronisms in the dialogue or references, this is why. This may also be quite a lengthy fic too.

BE WARNED: Social anxiety, mentions of blood and injury, grief, drinking, kissing but nothing more than that, death (this is Hogwarts Legacy, after all)

P.P.S: An interaction with my Hufflepuff boy Caleb below! Also, something that I've long thought of writing here, I have finally written. Also shout out to @ellivenollivander for the Amit love hour on discord!

Masterlist

Chapter 15

It was in recent days since the trip to the Overlook mine that Norah realized how close the Hufflepuff common room party was. Everyone in their year seemed to anticipate what Professor Ronen had up his sleeve as an assignment again. Perhaps another matchmaking activity disguised as another lesson. One could never tell with Professor Ronen.

Sebastian and Amit were on board with researching, using the books Norah and Ominis retrieved from the mine. It wasn't long before the three of them were huddled in the Astronomy tower, poring over each page for any relevant details as to how Isidora managed to hone her magic. Henry had also offered to lend a hand, especially after Natty accidentally let it slip about her special ability. Not many in the school knew about it, except the teachers and a select few students. Of course, Professor Black couldn't be bothered to learn the details as all he cared about was that wizardkind won that battle.

"I would've loved to get Bragbor's journals, I'm sure there are other details we can take from there," Amit said, showing Norah some parts that had to do with what she saw from the pensieve. As another way to finally get Sebastian to stop searching for a cure for Anne, Norah told him everything she saw, including the memories from the Keepers. It stemmed from a heated conversation following Sebastian's attempt to get her to do something.

"Are you sure you're doing this for Anne? Or are you doing this for yourself?" Norah questioned him that day. "Sebastian, being reckless will only secure your place in Azkaban. It's time you trusted Anne when she says not to go looking for a cure anymore. She's accepted her fate, all we can do really is what your uncle said. Keep her comfortable."

The words that came out of her mouth then reminded her of the story Madam Kogawa told her about her time preparing to join the Toyohashi Tengu. Her friend's fate was not hers to decide. It resonated with Professor Rackham's comments to Isidora when she was a student. Her father's pain was not hers to take. It would be the same for Sebastian, no matter how much he wanted to.

Upon Amit's comment, Norah stared at him, realizing the answer. "Oh my god, Amit, you're right! You're a genius!" She said.

"Wouldn't those pages be in Gobbledegook?" Henry raised a brow as he looked up from the book he was reading.

"I can read Gobbledegook, Henry," Amit looked proud. "I can teach you sometime if you want."

Henry looked impressed. "That's actually a brilliant idea. I'd love to know how to speak another language."

"Don't you speak French too?" Sebastian was curious.

The blonde smiled. "I do. I grew up in France, and then by my 11th birthday, we moved to England. In case you don't already know, Beauxbatons only accepts girls."

Sebastian, Amit, and Norah looked amused. "You could've gone to Durmstrang," Sebastian teased.

"Ah, that was an option, but this was closer to home," Henry said coolly. "I would've turned out very differently if I went to Durmstrang."

Norah chuckled, and they continued looking through several pages. "But Amit is right though, knowing that Bragbor kept journals even after he was obliviated by the Keepers, he would've documented his process. It's likely he only revealed what he had to do to contain the strands of emotion, but there must be something included in there too, maybe things Isidora told him."

"Hang on, what exactly are you going after all of this for?" Sebastian was confused. "Didn't you just contain that magic not too long ago?"

Norah nodded. "Yes. Professor Rackham told me that there's no other thing to be done with that, until we can learn how to destroy it."

Her words raised a look of concern from the two Ravenclaws. Even Sebastian looked alarmed. "Destroy it?" The three boys said.

"Yeah. For me to learn how to do that, I'll need to find out all the information I can about what Isidora did, what Bragbor did. The risks outweigh the possibilities of the good that could do. It needs to be destroyed so there won't be a secret to keep anymore."

They nodded in understanding. "Norah, this might take a lot of time," Sebastian said gently. "Speaking from experience, that is."

"I know that, but it's never too late to start learning about it," Norah assured him. "I just hope I can find the time in the midst of the NEWTs."

An owl suddenly flew inside, dropping a letter in front of Norah. "Is that from your 'Nick'?" Sebastian raised a brow, as the girl seemed to be unfazed with the presence of the envelope. "The secret summoning is long over, why is he trying to- Is he courting you?"

The question made Henry snort, Norah finally looking up from the pages of the book on her lap. She reached for the envelope, noticing the familiar handwriting and opened it, reading the letter. Her expression fell upon reading it, just as Ominis finally found them.

"I have been looking everywhere for you all-" Ominis stopped when he sensed something about Norah. "What's wrong? Norah?"

Norah stood up, making the three other boys look up at her. "I'm being called to go to Professor Black's office by Professor Weasley," She said.

"For what? Is it related to your rare ability?" Henry asked curiously.

Norah shrugged. "Well, studying these might have to wait, unless the three of you plan on doing that while I'm away."

"We can deal with this later, it's best that we study this whenever you're around so we can make sense of it," Henry suggested, with Amit and Sebastian nodding.

"Norah," Ominis said softly, making her turn around, her cheeks suddenly heating up when she realized he was standing behind her. "Would you like me to come with you? If we were caught in that mine again, I can come up with something, twist the story a bit."

She nodded. "Yeah, that might be best, I think, thank you, Ominis. You have more sway with him than I do. But if he happens to punish me, then so be it," She said, while that feeling of dread was beginning to creep in.

~

Her mind was racing with thoughts of what might they want to tell her. Did she get caught sneaking into the Overlook mine? Was she found out for snooping Horklump Hollow, which had now become Ashwinder territory? Or perhaps it had to do with that duel with Carrow, when she was cursed into bleeding? Or did it have to do with defeating Ranrok and his loyalists, along with those Ashwinders? Did she do something that Professor Black didn't particularly like? Did they find out the actual events at the Feldcroft catacomb? She wasn't sure.

Yet, as they climbed up the staircase leading to the statue that opened another set of stairs to the Headmaster's Office, Norah was trying to ground herself. She was there, now, walking with Ominis, preparing herself for what might happen while she was in there.

With Ominis.

Even with his generally stoic expression, Norah could also see a hint of concern play across his face. She wanted to say something, but she felt like it needed to be said after what might happen in there. It was going to be alright, wasn't it? She told herself as they slowly emerged in the room.

There Professor Black stood, by the steps in front of his desk, along with Professor Weasley. Across from them, was a shorter man, holding a giant camera, with a woman holding a notepad and a quill with a levitated inkpot in front of her. But next to Professor Black, was another man, a much older gentleman with a white beard an a discerning face.

"Ah, here she is now," Professor Weasley said. "With Mr. Gaunt, who has been one of her friends since attending Hogwarts."

"Stand over here, Ms. Lee," Professor Black gestured for her to come over, to the space next to him, putting her in between the two men.

"H-have I done something wrong?" Norah managed to speak. She wanted to ask if she was to be brought to Azkaban, yet the words failed her.

The older gentleman broke into a smile. "Merlin no, but it's an honor to meet you at last, Ms. Lee. I am Faris Spavin, the Minister for Magic," He held out his hand, and she shook it.

"It-it's very nice to meet you, Minister," She stammered, seeing Ominis look just as surprised.

"I wanted to wait a bit for the Wizengamot to confirm the previous year's achievements before I present you with something," Faris turned around, picking up a small rectangular velvet box. "As minister for magic, it is my solemn privilege and honor to present you an award for your outstanding bravery in last year's goblin uprising. Ms. Lee, I present you, the Order of Merlin, First Class."

He opened the box to reveal a gold medal, with a green ribbon. In the middle of the medal was an engraved "M." Professor Weasley and Professor Black beamed with pride, as the photographer nearby took a photo of them.

"A fellow Slytherin too, as you can see," Professor Black chimed in, beaming as the photographers took another photo.

"Ms. Lee, some words?" The woman holding the notepad suddenly asked.

Norah looked like she had been caught off-guard, overwhelmed with the sudden attention. "I-uh, I am honored to receive this achievement," She said. "I could not have done what I did last year without the guidance of my teachers here, in Hogwarts. They have all taught me well, as well as my friends. I think they also deserve to be recognized."

"You are also the youngest recipient of the Order of Merlin, First Class, so it's even more of an honor, Ms. Lee," Spavin added.

Ominis slowly stepped to the side, his heart swelling in his chest as he was proud of the recognition Norah had received. She deserved all the praise and recognition she was getting, while he was also amused at how nervous she sounded when speaking to the reporter. He wasn't too fond of the fact that Professor Black would definitely go bragging about how a student under his tenure as headmaster became the recipient of such an award.

Still, he didn't want that to cloud the feeling he had, hearing Norah try and answer questions as best as she could, while not disclosing her rare ability just yet. He could tell Norah's nervous and awkward smile as flash upon flash upon flash of the camera took their photos.

"You must be Ms. Lee's friend," the reporter suddenly approached him. Ominis could tell that she was looking at him in a way that seemed to suggest otherwise. "Gaunt, is it?"

"Y-yes, I am Ominis Gaunt," He replied, and his response was met with a furious scratching of a quill.

"Well, well, the company Ms. Lee keeps is quite prominent. Anything you want to say about her? I'm gathering some testimonies from people in her circle. If you could also kindly tell me who else she's friends with, it would help me a lot."

Ominis tilted his head towards Norah's direction, a smile creeping up on his face. "She's a very good friend of mine, and I rarely say that. She's been through a lot, yet she still manages to be there for everyone around her. Norah always denies being brilliant, but she is. Beautiful too."

The reporter seemed to raise a brow at the last comment. "Oh, is Mr. Gaunt...romantically involved with Ms. Lee?" She asked.

"No," Ominis replied right away, cheeks heating up. "No-no we're not."

At the back of his mind, no matter how much he reminded himself that things can never be between them, he wished they were.

~

The news of Norah receiving the award spread like wildfire in the school, mostly out of the portraits chattering amongst themselves and Professor Black's house-elf, Scrope. Issues of the evening edition of the Daily Prophet immediately came in, with her photo on the front page. She tried to ignore the comments congratulating her for the award, many of whom were from their own house table.

Norah kept herself preoccupied with the book in front of her while she ate, as she had a long essay on Ancient Runes due two days away. "Merlin, after everything that's happened last year, I should be fluent in runeish by now, or at least be able to read them," She mumbled, in between bites of chicken.

"She helped retrieve bubotuber pus for me last year, you know," She heard the Hufflepuff Sacharissa Tugwood, say to her friends as they approached their table.

"Merlin, the stories they come up with just to say they know you," Sebastian muttered.

"That actually happened," Norah revealed. "I was on my way to Dogweed and Deathcap to get some more chomping cabbages when she called me. I had to fight another troll to get some of the bubotubers but I managed to get them all."

Sebastian looked at her incredulously, while Ominis also seemed to stare at her. "Bloody hell, she says that like it's a walk in the park," He said. "Why did she need those bubotubers in the first place?"

"She apparently needed them for her pimple cream or something," Norah replied, turning another page of her book.

"That's almost as ridiculous as Professor Black telling me that dittany and bubotuber pus made a good mustache paste," Ominis said, making Norah chuckle. "Of all things, mustache paste?"

Norah laughed. "I had to say something, didn't I? It's bad enough I nearly outed Garreth for asking me to get those billywig stings."

The three of them exchanged knowing looks. Norah reached for the copy in front of Sebastian and looked into the article. She noticed the things that were said about her, some from Professor Weasley, from Ominis, from Amit, from Natty, even from Sebastian. Amit's quote seemed to be the most endearing.

"Norah Lee is not only a brilliant witch, she is also very kind, very courageous, and very clever. Even that isn't enough to describe a dear friend of mine. I would compare her to a comet. You only meet someone like Norah once in a lifetime, and when you do, you can be sure that your memories with her are special."

She smiled to herself, before looking back at what Ominis said. It definitely sounded like him, and she knew the reporter approached him while they were having photos taken. "I think I'll mail this to my parents. I wonder what they'll say," she said, folding the paper and placing it in her bag.

"I'm pretty sure they're going to be proud," Sebastian said, his expression softening when she closed her book and put it back in her bag as well. "Are you heading to the Owlery?"

"Yeah, I'm going to write to them," Norah smiled, glancing at Ominis, who had an amused expression on his face. "Fingers crossed their windows are open enough to receive some owls," She chuckled, hurrying out of the Great Hall.

As she opened the doors to the entrance hall, she was seemingly met with a flurry of papers, including some books that fell to the floor. "Shit," She muttered, hurrying to pick up the papers and the books, belonging to the sixth year Hufflepuff Caleb Revri. "I'm sorry about that, let me help you," She said.

"I'm so sorry- It's okay, I can pick them up," Caleb looked just as flustered as they gathered his belongings, some of which he managed to summon before it flew further to the corner.

If there was someone who could be misunderstood with their looks, it would be Caleb. Sporting an undercut with a head of dark brown curls, Caleb had eyebrow slits and several piercings on his ears, including one dangling earring. When they weren't wearing their uniforms, Caleb was often dressed in black, even sporting black fingerless gloves, and a red short-sleeved shirt with suspenders. If no one knew him, they would probably think he was some dark wizard or an Ashwinder at the very least. Yet, as Norah knew, Caleb was actually quite the opposite.

"It's fine, Caleb, I bumped into you, I have to help you," Norah summoned the rest of the books and papers, in time to stack each one on top of the other. Caleb offered a shy smile. "Just be careful on your way in," She said, handing them back to him.

"I will," He chuckled. "You're quite the hero, my parents couldn't be more surprised knowing that I'm in the same year as you," He added, gesturing to one of the papers, which had her photo.

Norah shook her head. "I'm surprised I even received it at all."

"Nonsense, you deserved it. With everything people say about you?" Caleb assured her. "Well, I have to go have dinner now, thank you for helping me."

"Not a problem at all," Norah smiled, walking off toward the direction of the grounds. She passed a few other students, including an unamused Henry, who, as one of the Ravenclaw prefects, had already begun his rounds. It wasn't surprising that Henry was a prefect at all.

"And where are you going, Lee?" He teased.

"Owlery, I'm not sure my parents received the news, but I hope they will," She replied.

Henry nodded. "Don't stay out too late, I might have to reprimand you," He teased again, shaking his head as he laughed to himself.

"You know," Norah turned around, walking backwards. "I wouldn't be surprised if you became Head Boy next year."

Henry laughed. "I'm not counting on it!" He called out.

[aeoki]

Blackjack - Gifts Will Not Arrive: Chapter 12

Location: Underground Family Residence Characters: Shinobu, Mayoi & Hitsugi Season: Autumn

Shinobu: Y–You say you're being tailed by bad guys? Who are these bad guys?

Mayoi: Ah, I was curious about that too. But Hitsugi-kyun wouldn’t tell me any of the details.

Hitsugi: I’m sorry. I can’t say a thing.

…I probably can’t keep saying that, huh.

Anzu-senpai, you’re an amazing person. You’re loved by everyone and you’re a “producer” with a special position at ES and Yumenosaki.

If you continue to be successful in the industry, then you’ll definitely enter “his” field of vision.

No, maybe you’re already within his grasp.

Depending on the circumstances, “he” might use you as he sees fit – as a pawn in his schemes.

You should learn as much as you can about “him” before that happens.

If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles, after all.

It might not sound very convincing coming from me, who betrayed your trust and used you for my own goals.

But I want to protect you. At the very least, I want to make up for pushing you around and making you sad.

No, just knowing that you acknowledged, loved, worried and came to see me – someone who’s like a ghost…

It felt like I was rewarded for living so desperately all this time.

I want to repay you. Even if it’s just a small amount – even if it’s a shameless act,

Anzu-senpai, there was once a god in the idol industry you all dwell in.

Shinobu: A god… That’s someone who comes up in our conversations sometimes – the “Godfather” or something.

Hitsugi: That’s just a nickname of his, though. Perhaps it’s fitting but everyone has been using that to refer to him lately.

God created everything. He dyed this country in the colour of idols. There was a golden age of idols, by idols and for idols a long time ago.

But that’s in the past now.

One day, God abandoned everything and disappeared.

But there is an individual who took over his place with a nonchalant look on his face.

That is my life-long enemy.

He is called “Priest”, and he is my real father.

Shinobu: “Priest”...?

Hitsugi: It seems you know of him. Good, good. You really shouldn’t get involved with him.

“Priest” has the ability to transform into others. It means he’s good at using disguises. He can use his power to create false records in his family registry to become a completely different person.

“Priest” used those abilities and replaced God – even now, he’s sitting at the top of the idol industry, controlling everything from the shadows.

Mayoi: I–If you’re the son of someone who’s like a king, then that would make you a prince, right?

Shinobu: So you’re an unexpectedly distinguished person, huh, Kurone-dono.

Hitsugi: It’s nothing as good as it sounds. I was born to inherit everything from “Priest”.

By everything, I mean everything. Wealth, power, looks, mentality – in other words, his soul.

Anzu-senpai, do you remember wandering into that mysterious place during the school trip?

The people from that land have the ability to fraternise with the dead. They’ll let the soul of the dead possess them.

It hasn’t been proven by science that a soul exists, so it should all be treated as nonsense, wild ideas or a hallucination, though.

“Priest” believed in it. At the very least, he decided it was worth investing in.

So God captured a priestess from that land in Australia and forced her to birth a child.

Mayoi: You mean–

Hitsugi: “Priest” is human. He’ll grow old and will die one day.

But “Priest” strongly feared losing everything he went through so much trouble to obtain once he died.

So he came up with a plan.

If “Priest” were to die of old age or in an accident…

In that case, he would use the abilities of the priestess to summon his own soul into the body of an individual who shares his own blood and genes.

By doing that, a human being exceedingly close to “Priest” physically and mentally – in terms of soul and even personality – can be “reproduced”.

And so, “Priest” will attempt to live eternally by trading bodies every time he dies.

Shinobu: T–That sounds like something from a fantasy novel ~de gozaru. I did have a feeling it would be possible based on what Mayoi-dono said earlier.

Hitsugi: Yes. It’s rare in Japan, though.

“Humans that aren’t supposed to exist” who aren’t acknowledged by their country and live in the sewers or in the middle of nowhere overseas do exist on occasion.

Mayoi: Sometimes, those people are exposed and they make front-line news. It’s something that could very well happen to us, so we’re a bit alert when it comes to that sort of information.

Shinobu: Hmm… But if that “Priest” can trade bodies and reincarnate that way, then it sounds like something straight from a manga.

Hitsugi: A manga, hm? Yeah, I bet it’s all just fantasy.

I don’t think “Priest” is sane anymore. And annoyingly enough, this insane person has enough power and wealth to distort this world.

And I’m his son.

Born for the purpose of harbouring his soul when he dies in the future.

I’ve been given the appropriate body and skills to make that happen. That’s how I was able to summon my big sister’s soul.

I wouldn’t have any evidence to deny that it’s all just in my head and say that it’s just a split personality disorder, though.

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[schizosupport]

Hi! I'm kinda noticing some characters I like might experience delusions or hallucinations, and I'm interested in headcanoning them as such, but I'm a simple autistic system with no experience or understanding of the difference between various delusional (or hallucinatory?) disorders and I don't want to be offensive at all - are there any firsthand references I could look to in order to discern or something like that? thanks!

Hi there anon!! Tbh I think in some ways, there's a lack of helpful, respectful and representative first hand accounts available about psychotic experiences. In the same way as being autistic, and being a system, is very individual to each person, so is psychotic stuff.

This is a blessing and a curse to writers and other creatives! If you just look up generic information about any of these things, the characters will end up stereotypical and not very relatable to anyone.

I think a really helpful notion is to think of psychosis as something meaningful and personal, on some level. It isn't always, but often it is, and it's better to conceptualise it that way, I think.

Hallucinations and delusions are "unreal" experiences, but they are based in the individual's reality. They rely on the culture the person exists in, our personal background etc. When I am in a room adjacent to a room where any of my loved ones are, I am likely to start hallucinating that they are having a fight, and I'm likely to start making up reasons, and thinking that I'm at fault, and that they might hurt each other. This is directly related to my childhood experiences.

Delusions and hallucinations are often negative, but not always. They can be comforting, or helpful, at times. It's a special way for the brain to communicate/process, somewhat like dreams it doesn't always make sense, but it's not always a nightmare.

Another thing to keep in mind that non-psychotics sometimes forget, is that we experience these things in a very real way, and they affect us mostly as if it really happened. People can and do regularly get traumatized by psychotic experiences, even if there was no real danger in objective reality.

Think of being a child. Children are often scared of weird things, where the adults "know better". Compassionate adults still help, and take the child's fear seriously, but other children or less compassionate adults might laugh or minimize the emotion.

For many psychotic folks, this dynamic never quite goes away. We are often weary of sharing our deep dark fears and experiences, because people may laugh in our face when we do. Or call us crazy, childish or even dangerous.

...I guess I'm thinking that if you already have the existing characters, and you want to add some psychotic spice, I think you need to think deeply about the character first.

What are their complexes, their traumas, their cultural background etc. Try to think of symbolism related to this. Think "what is their worst fear?", and then imagine if their brain regularly decided to just make their worst fear feel like fact or look/sound etc like fact.

What makes them quirky and unique? Is there a way to turn this up to the max, pushing it past the edge of "oh they are just quirky" into the territory of "wait, are they being serious right now?". (Spoiler alert: They are).

I think it can also be helpful to familiarise yourself with things like negative symtoms and cognitive symtoms and other related stuff, too, and if you want to portray a specific disorder, like schizophrenia, I would consider it a necessity.

Hope this was a bit helpful..? Perhaps. Y'all, feel free to reblog and add helpful links or thoughts!

[nagamas]

Note to myself: Remember to log out

Fic by Anonymous for @slotumn       A/N: Hello my dear friend, I wish you a happy new year and hope that all your wishes come true and that you can achieve all your goals.

“Note to myself: Remember to log out”

By: Anonymous

-Like … Retweet … Block… Hahahaha… Really?...Like… Follow… -Claude, a photographer student, was enjoying Twitter, looking and reacting to different posts while traveling in the subway.   

-Are you serious @GoldenD3er?" some random person answered about a joke he would do to his worst enemy.    -"Of course @Ashen_Demon, that's one of many of ideas in my head. Nice nickname by the way"     

 --Next stop: Riegan Av. --- announced a voice in the megaphone   

-Oh, so soon? - he asked himself while keeping the phone. Once in the street, Claude stretches his legs, enjoying the view of a calm city in the evening, but the travel wasn't over, he opened again his phone and asked for an Uber, there were buses that could take him home, but there was something important to do and little time to do it.

Once in the car and in the privacy of the back seat, he pulled out again his phone, logged out of twitter and entered again, this time with another account: Username: @Fallen_Star. 

It was a special account where he follow profiles a bit more… spicy. For example, artist drawing fictional characters with less clothes than the original designs, people posting links to mature fanfiction of famous books and movies, and his favorites, people showing their photos in daring postures and outfits.

There was something alluring, seeing people without embarrassment or doubts, showing them to the world just how they like without worries, in poses and clothes that made his imagination run wild, it always aroused him without fail, sometimes even more than her girlfriend.

Some months ago, somehow he won a Christmas raffle of a famous woman , the prize a “Sexy Christmas pack”, including the most basic stuff but the most funny for him was normal black underpants with just a little image of a deer, as a reference to Santa’s sleigh, but it didn’t had any christmas decoration or figure on it. “It was the only thing I could get in time” was the answer thought a direct message while thanking her for the gift. “And tell me, could we see you using that?” she asked “If you want I could share it in my account, you know I’m a big star here babe, one retweet from me and you’ll be really famous ;)”

The idea resounded in his head for the next days, could he really became as famous as one of the many account he follows? He considered himself handsome, and constant exercise in the university gym made his body well formed, but could he endure to show his face and exposed body to the wotrld? … “Well maybe not the face…”

“Hello babes! @Opera_Mittelfrank announcing a new guy in the comunity. He’s a little shy and avoid showing his face, but I’m sure his body would be enough to Follow him, now give all your love to the one and only @Fallen_Star!”

It was amazing how the internet works, one day you are a no one, then a bit of luck occurs with a raffle, you publish a photo of yourself with a simple deer mask and an underpants with a little deer, and the next day you have more than 1k followers asking for more.

At first the photos were only aimed to his torso, but with every new entry and upload his shyness began to fade, leading to more spicy photos highlighting more private zones.

Using his photograph knowledge thanks to his classes and having a wide apartment made easier to create unique scenarios and fresh material, keeping him busy and especially fun.

Once in the apartment, he immediately changed for that day session, the classic deer’s underpants combined this time with birthday’s accessories. 

-Some photos later- 

“Al right, let’s see – he said out loud checking the material in his laptop – We’ll use these ones, the birthday hat seems nice right in my… and the color it also alright, a bit blurry but it will work. Now, let’s write the special message…”

-----

*bzzzt*

Her cellphone sounded, showing the new notification, the bus was almost empty and there was no one close to see her screen, so no need to wait. She was hoping for that special announcement since weekend, “please be good, please be good” she thought before reading.

“Hello my dear followers, @Fallen_star here giving you my last work, thanking you all for your support in my first year in this awesome platform. As a token of my love, I’ll follow my teacher example and give you a raffle. The price, a pair of photos wearing whatever you want. See the rules below. See you later and good luck, Date limit…”

“Oh come on, I never won anything in this raffles” she grunted… while giving a like and a retweet to participate. “Oh, I’m almost there” she realized while recognizing the scenery. Lysithea stood up ready to descend in the next stop.

---

“Wow, only 5 minutes and the participants are almost at 200” Claude was surprised seeing so much people interested in his body, it also make him proud and a bit excited… fortunately that could be solved. Once changed to his normal clothes, putting everything in place in the dark room and double checking to don’t leave anything compromising outside, he closed the room and went to the kitchen.

“Some cheese, the wine is already there, she will bring the bread and …

Toc, toc, toc.

A sound at the door interrupted his work, a smile appearing in his face.

“It’s open! – he shouted – I’ll see you in the living room, also pick the movie”

“Claude?!, I swear someday something bad will really happen if you are so careless!” his girlfriend answered back a bit annoyed, “how do you know it was me an not some thief?”

“Well you see- he walked to living room with the food in some porcelain dishes – you are so small that your footsteps make no sound, so when suddenly someone knock the door without me hearing steps in the hall, I know it’s… ouch!”

Lysithea didn’t hold back and tossed him a pillow from the couch, that landed cleanly in his face.

“You’ll make me spill the food – Claude warned her while keeping the balance.

“You know I hate your jokes about my… my…. you already know!” she shouted back, visible angry and giving him the back.

Claude sighed, he still didn’t know how she falled in love with her considering his explosive nature, he left the food on a near table and slowly approached her.

“Oh come on sweet pie, you know I’m joking. Besides, you didn’t comply last night when, thanks to your stature, we could try that new position you saw in…”

-She turned back once again but with great embarrassment, her face was so red and her body trembling without control: “Shut up, I knew I shouldn’t have tell you about that” 

“But it was really fun- he teased back – at least you seem to enjoy it more than…”

Another pillow flew but he avoided this time, making fun of her was a treasure but it was time to stop.

“Ok ok, I’ll shut up, besides I don’t want to ruin my turn tonigh, you remember today is…”

“Yeah yeah I know – she answered a bit more composed but still flustered – the clothes are already in my bag” she get embarrassed again, thinking what would be using later that night.

“Perfect – he said getting even closer, gently picking her chin to look her directly in those pink eyes- you know I love you right?”

“Yes, you dummy” she said while closing the gap among them to share the first kiss of the afternoon.

“Now stop being a bully and let’s watch the movie, my friend Cyrid recommend…”

-Are you still watching? – the text in the tv asked to no one since both of them left to the dorm room more than one hour ago.

--

-The next day-

“See you later honey, gotta go early today”

“Yeah, take care…” Claude answered still sleepy “don’t forget to…” he heard an specific sound.

“Sweet pie?”

“Yes?” she asked a bit nervous

“Are you trying to open the dark room”

“Maybe..”

Sigh “You know that…”

“Yes yes, important photos could be damaged if I open it harshly, come on!, at let me see the room at least once! I want to know how it looks” she argued back.

“Someday I promise, but not today, now go or you’ll miss the bus”

Some minutes later he heard the door closing, he left some minutes pass and stood up, heading to the dark room and getting everything ready to some quick shoots before going to school.

---

*bzzzt*

Her cellphone sounded, announcing than @Fallen_star uploaded just now another photo.

----------------------------

-2 weeks later-

“It sounded funny, but it was a real mess” Claude tought while taking the third shower in less that half hour, the winner of his raffle had a very specific request as her prize “I want your first photos, but being covered in oil” 

--

“Wow! Just wow!, you went all in my dear @Spellcaster_luna! To ask for such a sexy thing” he said to the winner by private message

“You said the winner could ask for anything, are you retracting now?”

“Never, I’m sure it’s going to be a mess but also seem pretty funny, I’ll sent it once they are done, if you want to share them to everyone is up to you…”

--

He missed one day to school just to have enough time to take the photos and clean it all without Lysithea noticing, “I hope you like them ;)” he said trough the app while sending the material.

“Now, I have till noon to myself, maybe some videogames or reading…”

---

“Miss Gloucester, is everything ok?” The professor Hannenman asked to the young girl after hearing her yelping in her place.

“No, no, no – she said extremely embarrassed and flustered – I mean, yes, everything is… no, sorry professor but – he packed all her things and stood to get out the classroom – I must go, sorry for interrumpting you”

Everyone in the room get confused, she was well knowed for his good behavior and seriousness.

--Your Uber is almost there –

The phone showed, she was waiting outside the university trying to control herself, “Damn it damn it, he looks so hot! “ it was everything in her mind, seeing the photos that the Fallen Star sent her really affected her. She loved Claude above everything, and she felt a bit guilty asking for such things in twitter, but it was a price she never expected to get and technically it wasn´t cheating, she just like to see those profiles to get ideas and add more excitement to her relationship. 

-Your Uber just arrived-

A red car parked near, she get inside and said to the driver.

“Thanks, I’m sorry but I don´t want to talk during the trip, please try to get as fast as possible to the destiny” – the driver, named Alois, get sad because he alwys liked to tell jokes to the passengers, but he respected her desires.

All that excitement had to get out somehow, she had an special underwear hidden in the apartment, for an special day, and today was that day. But she needed to set the mood in the bedroom for that, “with Claude outside I have enough time” she thought while seeing the photos again. Her excitement increased once again.

--

She stormed in the apartment using for the first time her spare key, all her plans halted after seeing Claude standing in the hallway just wearing a towel, “Lysithea! – he shouted with surprise – what are you…” he got interrumpted after being tackled and shutted down with a passionate kiss.

It felt really different, something wild was inside her girlfriend and really wanted to get out.

“Shut up, I want to make something more special but it will do – she kissed him again – come to bedroom, let’s try something new – she grabbed his hand and guided him – also… do you know how to use oil during…

--

They laid exhausted hugging each other in the bed

Claude was really surprised, he didn’t’ know she could be so passionate and wild, also it was weird to get covered in oil twice in a day.

Lysithea on the other side felt fulfilled and happy, she grabbed her phone when his companion stood up and, without thinking, texted back to Fallen_star to thanks him for the gift.

“Thanks a lot <3 “ a simple yet sincere message.

At the same time Claude ‘s phone ringed.

“Weird – she thought – my love, you cell just ringed – she said out loud since Claude had left for the bathroom

“I’m sure it’s a friend from the school , text him back please”

“Ok – she answered while picking it – oh wait, it’s a twitter message, it’s from someone named Spell…

Claude almost shoot down the door of the bath , the sudden arrival of her and the subsequent events make him forgot to log out, in that moment he felt the true terror.

“Honey, please… I can explain it… you see…”

She stood there without know what to do, a lot of things need to be processed, but she only grabbed her phone and show it to him.

“What is… are those my… YOU ARE?!...”

--

-The next weekend-

“Are you sure… what if they don´t like me?”

“Are you insane! You are gorgeous, the world must know you, only if you want of course”

In the ex dark room, now reconstructed as a mini photo studio, Lysithea stood there wearing a cat mask and black underwear that matched perfectly with the white piece Claude was wearing.

“Fine… I still don´t know how you convinced me” she hugged and kissed him in the cheek “but are you sure you don´t want to continue in your main account”

“No, I did it to get more excitement in my life… but having you is way more excitement than I could handle, and we can close this account whenever we want and just enjoy ourselves” he kissed her back and pet her head.

“Now, last chance, are you ready?”

She nodded and without warning she clicked in the computer.

--

“Hello my dear followers, today is the day that this account will be closed, Don’t be sad since we’ll be migrating to @Verdant_wind (special prize to the one that guess why we choose that name) and I say “we” because also today I’m presenting you to someone very special to me and that would be companying me in this new era. Say hi to @Swe3tCat and give her all your support <3 “

In the tweet, also appeared a photo of a couple, the well knowed Fallen_star next to a beautiful girl, with a skin as white as the snow in some gorgeous black attire, but the most important thing, they seemed extremely happy and in love.

[puppy-wife]

okokok i have charged up the social batteries and am ready to yap back @ u!!!!!!

so again, ty for such a big answer 😭 i love hearing ppl yap about their special interests, v cool v nice

questions i have are:

why is 3.5e your fave? im only familar with 5e so i dont know much

playing wit tarot cards instead of dice sounds cool af, which game do u do that in?

for ur world building, how do u personally go about starting such a vast project?

as for meee i havent actually played a TTRPG yet 🤓 i have only watched 5e campaigns on youtube so far! but i love the creativity that goes into this stuff & it has become one of my favourite pieces of media to consume

no YOU'RE very cool very nice I love opportunities to talk about my favorite stuff, so I am absolutely super happy lmao

1.) I really liked 3.5e because it gave a lot more variety and ways to make your character unique vs 5e today (don't even get me started on fucking OneD&D or whatever they're calling it. trash). Firstly, back then wizards was making so many books for that edition that you could make any kind of character you wanted to play. They even allowed official material to be printed by other companies!! you want to play the ultimate evil wizard who gives people cancer? that exists. you want to play the perfect necromancer, and maybe even be undead yourself? you can do that. You could build your characters skills to different levels and choose exactly how good you are at certain things. You could take a Flaw, a permanent debuff on your character but in exchange get a Feat! god fucking Prestige Classes!! those were the coolest fucking part of the game, building a character and leveling them up enough to unlock this special class with wild abilities you can't get from a basic class. this isn't to say that 3.5e didn't have its faults, it could be confusing and the math could sometimes really add up. in some ways it needed a bit of streamlining but 5e basically threw a lot of that away in order to streamline everything. If you want a good example but how fluid 3.5e could be, you should play the videogame Neverwinter Nights 1 or 2, the system they use in that game is taken directly from 3.5e. It just made characters feel so mechanically unique that each character felt different. These days it almost feels too formulaic and too streamlined.

2. I honestly don't know what the name of using it is called, anytime me and my friends have done it, we just use the reference book that comes with a tarot deck and spontaneously decide the outcome based on the way the card could be interpreted. For example, let's say you're fighting a monster, and you want to try and escape from the monster, maybe even lure it away from your friends so they can escape. If you drew the Ten of Swords, I would say that would mean that you successfully draw the monster away, but you fall prey to it in the process. or something similar, yanno? but I don't know if that style of playing has a name given to it lol

3. oh I actually had someone ask me that yesterday! I'll send you the post once I find it, I was very active yesterday so it may take me a minute lol

you're so valid for that!! it can be hard to find a good group to play with, every group I've had has kind of fallen into my lap, but also to be fair I am known for being very into ttrpgs lmao

what are your favorite shows/campaigns you've watched? fun fact somewhere out there exists about 30 episodes of a d&d actual play podcast that I DM'd from somewhere around like... 2019? I think? lmao. technically I have a TON of episodes in a backlog somewhere that I never edited but that campaign kind of fell apart and I never finished it.

[quetozcoatl]

For the fanfic game: B, F, and R!

Original ask meme here, feel free to send me a letter!

B: Any of your stories inspired by  personal experience?

One of my old RWBY fics is me angsting about my neurodivergency via the lens of Professor Ozpin. NGL, I'm considering deleting it, it's... embarassing, and not my best work.

On top of that, the backstory for one of my WoW OCs was based on, for lack of a better term, my daddy issues. It's a fucking cringe backstory and it just turned melodramatic and I'm so glad I reworked it.

But for a more light-hearted response, it's a fic I'd like to write. When I was young, one of my teeth was loose. I complained about it to my older brothers, and one of them responded with: "Oh, your new tooth is going to grow into a vampire tooth" ...or something along those lines. Knowing my younger self, she was terrified and probably cried.

I think it's a perfect concept for Klint and Barok van Zieks!

F: Share a snippet from one of  your favorite dialogue scenes  you've written and explain why  you're proud of it.

As much as I want to post a snippet from my roleplaying on WoW, I won't, because it will require a paragraph of lore-dumping, which I am prone to do at a moments notice, just read any of my AU fics.

I have a LOT of WIPs, and some of them do have dialogue I quite enjoy. However, one of them just takes the cake: it's from an AU inspired by Baldur's Gate 3 (a very good game!) and tried to work within the canon of Dungeons and Dragons. In it, Klint is a bard of eloquence, rather than a ranger. I decided to make Balmung his stuffed hell-hound that Mama van Zieks made for him and he cherishes deeply, and my favorite dialogue is Klint talking to that Balmung:

”What was I thinking, Balmung?!“ No one would hear him, he had wards specially installed to prevent that. In here, he was free to talk how loud he wanted to an inanimate object, and no one to judge him for it, either! “Acting like some sort of seductress, touching her with my bare hands!” He gives Balmung a squeeze. “I don't want to be a harlot, and, I must have frightened her terribly with these talons of mine.”

This too, which happens some lines later:

“Hells!” He snatches his head back in. “Can you believe this, Balmung?” The dog did not respond, on account of being just a stuffed animal.

R: Are there any writers (fanfic or otherwise) you consider an influence?

First off, Guillermo del Toro. He is one of my idols and I look up to his storytelling a lot. I love that he does not sacrifice color to tell dark stories, and that his works have taught me to accept that I'll write what I want! Another one is Zack Morrison who writes and draws the webcomic Paranatural, which I have kept up with since high school. They made the swap to a blend of writing and art sometime in 2021, and the descriptiveness and cleverness of the writing has made my jaw drop.

Next, Another one is Eiichiro Oda. That man can casually reference something he wrote hundreds of chapters ago, and no matter how crazy things get, it feels perfectly plausible within the world of One Piece. But unfortunately it's come at a cost due to him being a mangaka, and I must stress the importance of taking care of yourself before anything else.

These two are well-known for their diverse cast of characters, and Zack Morrison does little, but effective things to make the characters stand out even more in the mixed setting and it's genius. However, an honorable mention to Andrew Hussie and Homestuck, for popularizing the concept of using limited things in text like numbers and cases to distinguish the characters.

Now, the next is sillier: Elizabeth Hoyt and Tessa Dare. Yes, they crank out regency romance novels but they know their niche, damn it! My first romance novel was Duke of Sin by Elizabeth Hoyt, and it's helped me really come to terms with the fact that what I read is not necessarily what I want. I love the fantasies romance novels bring, but the idea of actually BEING in a romance makes me want to run away screaming!