#sorry for being slow I’m just working thru my thoughts

[theloveinc]

hi cato!! just wondering if you received my ask with the recs :>

hello!!😚Thank u for checking, I did indeed get it… just got a little flustered by it so I’ve yet to decide how to respond and say thank u👉🏻👈🏻 but it’s def there and ily!!

[fandomnerd9602]

So Easy

Wanda Maximoff x Male Reader

For @lifespectator and @aloneodi

It’s not like she meant for this to happen. You were so loving and kind, especially to Billy and Tommy. And for young widow, Wanda Maximoff, that was what made you so appealing.

You were a babysitter/ big brother mentor. Billy and Tommy had lost their father at a very young age and it seemed that they were yearning for someone to help guide them.

You were more than happy to become that mentor for them. You’d play soccer with Tommy and then create poetry with Billy. You’d run laps with one boy and help draw pictures with the other. They were practically begging their mom for you to be their babysitter whenever she needed a night out with her best friend and neighbor Agatha.

Every time Wanda saw you playing with her boys, it made her heart flutter. Every time you made the boys or even Wanda giggle, it made her fall that much more in love with you.

And then it all came to a head one night after you had gotten the boys off to sleep before Wanda got home. She walked you to the door, thanking you for your help.

“It was nothing Mrs. Maximoff” you smiled at the young mother. “Billy and Tommy are simply the best.”

Without even thinking, Wanda leaned in and kissed you, “okay bye I love you”

You were absolutely frozen. Shocked but pleasantly shocked. Wanda, meanwhile, went red in the face with embarrassment.

“I’m so sorry” she managed to say as she slammed the door in your face and sunk against the wooden door.

You, on the other hand, walked away with the goofiest smile on your face.

Wanda practically called Agatha about the whole thing. Her friend almost died laughing at hearing Wanda’s little story.

“Scandalous” Agatha answered back, “you got it bad for your boys’ sitter”

Wanda couldn’t stop herself from blushing. It had been so long since she had been in love. So long since she allowed herself to feel that kind of joy. How was it so easy for her to fall for you?

Didn’t take long for Wanda to try and invite you over for dinner. Just a little meal to straighten things over. The boys practically tackled you as you walked thru the door.

They told you about their day at school. And yes you were paying attention to them but your heart was drawn to the young widow preparing the meal for all of you.

You walked into the kitchen as Wanda was slaving away at a hot stove.

“Will you at least let me help if we’re not gonna talk about last night?” You joked as you aided Wanda with the meal prep.

The two of you worked in tandem, soon, dinner was in the oven and you had a few minutes to talk.

Wanda bites her lip in worry as she looks at you, “I-I don’t know what came over me. I’ve never felt this way for anyone in a long time”

“I understand”

“It’s not like I was trying to throw myself at you” Wanda lets out a nervous laugh, “it’s just that everything’s so easy when I’m with you.”

You take a step towards her. Her nimble fingers play with one another out of a nervous little habit.

“I like being with you and my boys” she tries to say, “they’re everything to me and I’m so glad that they have someone like you and…and…”

You take her cheek in your hand, caressing her porcelain face. Your eyes wander to her Ruby red lips. Her eyes dart to yours.

Like metal to a magnetic, you two launch at each other. Wanda holds you tight as your arms wrap around her waist. You kiss her lips with all the passion you thought you buried deep down. Out of pure instinct one of her legs wraps around your waist as you gently push her against the fridge.

“I love you” you whisper against her lips. “I’ve loved you for so long”

“Same here…detka” her voice drips with that little nickname.

You share slow loving kisses as her hands massage your scalp. Her touch, the very thing you’ve craved, satisfies your very soul.

“Wanda?”

“Mmm?”

“I think the oven’s about to go off” you warn as the smell of something slightly burnt fills the air. Wanda giggles as you and her pull away.

“To be continued” she giggles before giving you one last kiss.

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

HI RAVEN!!!! 🤔 kinda a random thought not really but would you consider ace and sebek to be like? RIVALS? or to have a strong dislike towards eachother compared to other first years/students? 🤔🤔 haven’t read much sebek stuff or book 7 so maybe it’s just the way I interpret things……..

🤔🤔 for me at least I feel like ace brings up sebek especially a handful of times? and to bash on him too or at least poke fun at him. can’t think of a lot off the top of my head but in ace’s birthday jacket vignette he picks at sebek specifically when going thru dorm choices. WHICH LIKE……. I DUNNO ITS GIVING VERY “I BEEF W HIM” VIBES. I figured it could just be because he’s a fellow first year but ?? jack or epel don’t get mentioned when he was talking about their dorms so i’m not sure 🤔

👁️👁️ but I wanna hear your take on it!!! are ace and sebek ACTUALLY beefing or was it all just a headcanon??? 😭😭 hopefully I didn’t yap too much. btw

Sorry for the lack of screenshots; I don’t own all the relevant cards in EN and didn’t want to include screenshots sporadically 💦

But!! I did my best to cite where I’m pulling my information from (main story, vignettes, etc.) and directly quote from the official localization. Hope that’s okay!

I mean… Sebek is pretty much always pissing off his peers because of the condescending way he talks to them. It’s no wonder why he rubs people the wrong way. As for Ace, he has indicated that he finds Sebek to be a pain in the ass. I don’t know if I would personally call it “beefing” though?? I see it more as Ace just wants Sebek to shut up and chill out (though Sebek would definitely shout at Ace and fight him) 😂

Point is, I don’t see Sebek having a particular disdain for Ace (he is abrasive toward everyone), but I do see Ace having a particular dislike for Sebek. They aren’t “rivals” in the same way that Ace and Deuce are, as Ace and Sebek don’t really compete for anything or get into many instances of bickering—at least not from what we see. That might just be a product of Sebek being formally introduced later than the other first years, but even counting vignettes and event interactions, it’s still pretty one-sided; often we see Ace commenting on Sebek but not the other way around.

According to Ace in 7-11, he knows Sebek because they’re in the same Magic Analysis/Enigmics (EN writes this class as both of these so it can get confusing) elective. He also implies (in 7-34) sharing other electives with Sebek. This means Ace has regular direct experience with Sebek compared to the other first years (except maybe Deuce?)… ie more opporunities to be annoyed by Sebek’s arrogant loner attitude.

Ace reports (again, in 7-34) that “[Sebek] insults people like, all the time. He even says stuff right to my face when we're in the same group, like, 'Don't you dare slow me down, human!' And he always finds some way to make every subject about Malleus, then drones on and on about how great he is." In regards to those intense feelings about Malleus, Ace says "[Sebek] takes it to a whole other level [...] I can see why people would idolize [Malleus]. But, like, you don't have to make it your entire personality, y'know?" Ace repeats these ideas in his Birthday Boy vignettes. “[Sebek]’s always yelling something or other about his precious Malleus. Oh yeah, and he talks down to us for being human. Dude's a total fae fanboy.”

In Sebek's School Uniform vignette, Sebek yells at Ace for running in the halls. Ace responds by calling him an "uptight nag" whose yelling will disturb other students. Ace also points out how pathetic Sebek comes across as after witnessing him trip over himself to apologize to Malleus. “Dude, nothing you say's gonna impress anyone after that sorry sight.” When Ace tries to leave the scene to make it to class, Sebek shouts at him. “You wait just a minute! I'm not finished! COME BACK HERE!” It should be noted that Ace is someone who always tries to find shortcuts or ways to get out of work whereas Sebek is strict and diligent. Their mindsets and values naturally clash.

This, I think, is a very good summary of most people's problems with Sebek. Ace is just saying what's on everyone's mind--and this makes sense for Ace's character, as he has consistently been the type of guy to call others out. He also encourages Yuu to do the same (in his Birthday Boy vignettes). This detail at least implies Ace finds it amusing on occasion to tease Sebek for his shortcomings.

We see Sebek’s behavior in class for ourselves in his Dorm Uniform vignettes. Ace actually appears in them too, remarking that Sebek is a “loudmouth”. This is something he echoes in his Birthday Boy vignettes; “Loudmouth doesn't even begin to describe him.” When Sebek starts arguing with his group members (some mobs) and refusing to work with them while simultaneously extolling Malleus, Ace says “Here we go again with Sebek and his ‘liege’… Man, imagine being grouped with that guy who […] All he had to do was play nice and let [the mob students] help. He CHOSE to make things harder. How does that guy even function in society?” Side note: In Ace’s Suitor Suit vignettes, he calls Sebek the “number-one worst contender” for a groom. Ace clearly thinks Sebek is unfriendly and annoying in areas extending beyond academics or school life. This is, of course, in addition to Ace finding his loud voice grating.

Later in the same vignettes, Ace and Deuce are forced to sit close to Sebek in the crowded cafeteria. Sebek insists to Lilia that his classes are going well, to which Ace starts snickering and reveals the truth: “Dude... No problems whatsoever? You've got nothing BUT problems, bro! Haha!” Deuce pitches in: “He got into a loud argument with some classmates during our defensive magic lesson. He called his groupmates ‘burdens’ and insisted on doing their entire project by himself.” Ace then says Sebek must think highly of himself and gets annoyed when his words are taken literally. “Do you not understand sarcasm either?” He tells Sebek to fix his attitude, but it doesn’t seem to work. Ace sighs and says he’s just wasting his breath on this.

Sebek’s Dorm Uniform vignettes illustrate Sebek’s general struggles to get along with all of his classmates, not just Ace or Ace specifically. Deuce notably also calls Sebek out for causing trouble for his peers, even stating “[…] as an aspiring honor student, I can't condone your behavior. Having confidence is fine and all, but you shouldn't make things harder for others. That's just being obnoxious.” Sebek pisses off the other first years in 7-34 too, calling them “shallow” and making a terrible first impression. Ace, who is also present, says that no one wants to be chummy with him anyway—not if he’s going to act like that.

In conclusion, Ace has explained his rationale for disliking Sebek many times over. Rather than saying Ace has a problem with Sebek, I think it would be more accurate to say that Ace has a problem with Sebek and is simply relaying the opinions that everyone else holds directly to Sebek’s face. (He gets annoyed that Sebek takes none of it to heart though.) As for the other party, Sebek chides Ace no differently than he would anyone else stepping out of line, not appreciating Malleus, or… just existing as a human 💀 He doesn’t seem to have issues with Ace other than his lax attitude (which could also apply to many other characters such as Leona).

In my opinion, Ace and Sebek are not rivals (at least not major ones), nor do they have specific beef with each other outside of one-off instances or whenever Ace is in the mood to lay down The Truth and embarrass Sebek. I see Ace and Deuce as your classic rivals and Sebek as like… a villain of the week who cameos here and there after his first appearance to cause shenanigans.

[superstarcherrycolagirl]

wanted to request a julien baker angst fic if u felt like it :) maybe a fight + reconciliation or julien comforting gf going thru something? tysm

omg anon THANK YOU SO MUCH! i think added way too much angst than you expect (i got so carried away) but i hope you like it :)

you’re losing me

julien baker x fem!reader/ 1.2k words

idea: you’ve been fighting for tjis relationship for so long, that you just can’t do it anymore

tw: angst, fighting, swearing, both are SO TOXIC yikes, crying

note: i’ve been listing to too much of “midnights” and “ttpd”.. so i might have mixed loml + you’re losing me + so long, london (if you squint) SO SORRY YALL AHHH! but yay first julien request EEEEK! i do love my angsty girl so I hope y’all enjoy

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ ˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆

“you promised you’d be here tonight!” “i never promised anythi-” “yes you did! you promised me that we’d make dinne-” “what the hell are you talking about?” this is what your evenings looked like. fighting back and forth. julien just arrived home from the studio today, and she’s been prickly all night long. and you’ve been impatient.

for months julien was leaving for the studio at the crack of dawn and coming home later than midnight. she would leave for tour for on end months, mores shows being added for her and the boys, and then come back home to do more work. you’ve been barely surviving off of kisses and updating each other on life during awkward phone calls, or worse, conversations with her at home. barely being together is already an tough pill to swallow, and then coming home in a bad mood every time?

you’re tired. so tired.

“i don’t understand why you’re acting like this. i’ve be-“ “i’m not acting like anything! honey you’ve been the one coming home in a shitty mood every single time!” “shitty mood? baby i’ve been working non stop on-” “on the album! the tour! the awards! i know! you’ve been running yourself ragged and your-” “oh my fucking god can you let me speak! christ! i can’t even speak without you talking all over me!” julien raised her voice, her firm and sharp words echoing in your LA home. the words in your mouth got caught in the back of your throat.

you’ve always had trouble advocating for yourself and using your voice to communicate your emotions, to be vulnerable. and julien was one of the main reasons why you could now freely express your feelings. so her yelling at you for just trying to be honest is like a punch to the gut.

your eyes stated to become glossy and your once caught words melted to created a soreness in your throat. you couldn’t help it. you tried to speak, but your words were breathy and dry.

“jules.. m’s-” “no! no you don’t get to fucking cry! y-you don’t get to cry when you started this whole thing! not when i’ve been the one getting out of bed every morning to fucking bring a meaning to my fucking life. i work and work and work until i’m basically killing myself just so that i can continue being there for the people who count on me! for the people who need me!” she’s breathing heavily, chest rising and falling so fast you thought she’d fall over. she’s fuming.

on the other hand your breaths are so slow and choppy, that it’s making your face and nose feel tingly. numb. you aren’t breathing enough, literally. you tried to open your mouth again, but she snapped at you before you could. and this time her words made your heart sink “so don’t fucking complain to me about not being home. you don’t get it because you can’t even get out of bed! you don’t get to tell me that i’m bad for trying to help others like me! who need me! you don’t fucking get it. and you won’t until you get up and out of the house and do something about it!” she said with a final huff, cheeks red and sweaty fists clenched.

silence fell between the both of you. you didn’t know what to say. what could you say? she basically said you won’t ever understand her life because she always needing to be there for others with because of her work. because of her art. she can connect with people and care for the ones who she’s helped. they count on her.

so why can’t you? why can’t she be there for you when you need her.

your ears were ringing, fingers shaking, soul aching. you expected your heart to be pounding outside of your chest, but it wasn’t. you expected to feel your heart beat and scream inside your body from how much you were hurting, but you couldn’t feel it. you couldn’t feel your heart beat for this life, for this love, for her. you couldn’t feel your heart beat, and without that heart beating there was no pulse to find, because that heart won’t start up. and you don’t think it will again.

“i can’t do this anymore julien” your voice broke the silence and filled the chilling air “i can’t keep living like this. i can’t keep waking up every morning and falling asleep every night without your there not know how long it will be like this, not until it’s too late” you couldn’t believe those words were coming out of your mouth, you never expected them to “i gave you everything i had because i thought you cared just as much as i did. you care so much about other people, you care so much to recognize them for who they are. you care so much to listen to them. you care so much to be there for them,” your emotions were building up until you couldn’t keep it in anymore. “i get it! i get it because i need you there too! i’ve been needing you for so long! and i’ve waited and waited and i’ve never complained because i thought that the time would come around where you would just be here! and you know what? it hasn’t happened yet! and i’m so tired!” you’re voice was watering, fighting off the to cry. you took a deep breath, trying to regain yourself enough tk finish “i’m so.. tired. of all of this. and i know now that you’re tired too” you spoke to julien directly to her face, really looking into her eyes for what you think will be the last time.

now her eyes were glossy, tears threatening to leak and stream down her face. she was speechless, feeling like all the life was drained from her body head to toe. how did she get here? standing in the house she built together with you and dreamed of growing old in.. to this? on the brink of losing the love of her life.

“baby..” “..julien” you wouldn’t even call her by her pet names. you couldn’t. you couldn’t keeping holding on when you still feel so hollow. you needed to stop. this needed to stop “i have to go, i’ll.. i’ll call someone to get my stuff out later” you start making your way to the front door “what-no! baby pleas-” she grabbed your wrist, trying to bring you back to her. she doesn’t want to lose you. she can’t. she stopped you just before you reached the door, but you quickly turned to her and placed your hand on top of her wrist “julien you need to let go-” “i can’t let you go! w-we can talk about this. fix us! baby i-i can’t lose you! i won’t!” the desperation in her eyes and pleading cries made you tremble, wanting to comfort her. but you tore her knuckle dying grip off you as you opened the door, looking at her one more time to see the tears rolling down her face. you wanted to run back in and hold her. kiss her. love her. be there for her. be here with her. but you knew that couldn’t happen, because you couldn’t find that pulse between you anymore. it was gone. you had to let her go, because she was already doing so.

“you already did julien..”

I can’t find a pulse, my heart won’t start anymore.

[bonnvivre]

A Funny Thing- Ch 22 word dump

shortening the title cus it’s a pain to write over and over, full title in the tags, link to chapter below cut (as if ppl other than the author themselves will look at this but hey)

very much a word dump i have no idea what’s going on below this cut it’s 4am im tired

————————————————

i read every single chapter out loud to myself- i like to pretend i’m an english teacher reading the assigned story of the quarter to their students and then i give an oscar worthy performance with the dialogue

ALSO GOSUKU TAG HAS BEEN ADDED FOLKS WOOOOOOOOOOOOO

yeah dr sato as you should lmao honestly i’d dedicate my entire work hours to these two mfs

“After all, she has a feeling their story is still far from over. Who knows what else may be lurking beneath the surface.” girl this is 16 yrs of LORE of course it’s not over 😭 they got BAGGAGE

4 yrs old, born 2007, we’re at 2011 now, gojo is around 22 yrs old (note for me)

OH RIGHT YUUJI WAS MANIFESTED THRU MAGIC LMAO OFC HE DOESNT HAVE DOCUMENTS

“Yuuji doesn’t have a last name.” A

oh my gkd giggling sukuna having beef w the cheater, got into indoor cycling just to best her love that for him 

also love chismosa ‘kuna, telling gojo abt the tea, kettle and all, even giving him a real time show 

“In a feat of superhuman strength-“ LMAO

god im cryimg are those full coherent sentences ??? OJ GODKM GONSN FCRUY AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA YUUJIIIIIIIIIII a hundred billions hours oh ur so silly

teehee their son, our son, such subtle changes in the writing but it says so much 🥹

AWHSGAFAHAGDIS I KNEW HE WAS GONNA GET THE ITADORI SURNAME IM SO HAPPY FOR WASUKE HE DESERVES HIS SURNAME TAKEN BY HIS GRANDSON OH THE JOY 

god im sorry i just bursted out laughing while i was reading i couldnt help but think of the memes WHAHSDJ dad i frew up 

damn he didn’t return the handshake that’s actually so crazy

YUUJI THROWS UP ON HIS DESK OH SHITTF AAAAAAAA DESERVED SCREW YOU PRINCIPAL IVE BEEN GIVING A SINISTER BRITISH ACCENT TO

i initially thought it was mainly about sukuna’s “tattoos” that the first two schools were wary about, but i forget that, to others, they’re a queer family and definitely back then, it still wasn’t socially accepted. not sure why it didn’t cross my mind, especially with a conservative country like japan, but i’m glad there’s some light to it as a part of the challenges they go through while navigating their relationship and their lives.

HELLO WE’RE NOT JUSY GONNA BRUSH OVER THE FACT THAT THERE WAS A SECOND TIME THEY KISSED WITHIN THOSE 4 YEARS WTF DID I FORGET THIS ???? (after chapter note: OK COOL I WASNT FORGETTING THINGS LMAO oh please i gotta see what this infamous incident may be pleaseeeeeeee)

oooooooh the romance is really slow cooking goodness my favorite om nom nomnomnom

ohhhhhh my heart….what are you doing to me, weiserr……wholesome cute family moment…….my cause of death indeed

AWWWW AN ADMINISTRATIVE BODY THAT ACTUALLY CARES FOR THEIR STUDENTS’S WELL BEINGS LETS GOOOOOOO

after chapter thoughts:

MY MOM HAS A PELOTON BIKE TOO AHAHAHAHA LOVE MORE OF ‘KUNA IN HIS MOM ERA

imagine if they came across toji dropping off megumi at school or smth (yknow if mamaguro is still alive and their lives are good), i cant even imagine the animosity gojo and sukuna would have towards him

“heyyyy guys sorry i tried to kill you and your son back then crazy times huh”

his new friend is junpei bet (watch me be wrong)

[taegularities]

! Brief trigger: this is not exactly a rant, it’s a story time but a very long one, pls bear with me 🥲 (also my first ask so there’s that)

Been following you for a while now Rid, I’ve mostly read your standalone fics like love me better, begin, silk & stones, stars behind waves & tale of broken hearts. I consider myself as the type who likes gut wrenching angst that ends in happy ending or at least a feeling of hope at the end. These ones like you had promised, were definitely angst heavy (esp the vmin fics). I prefer not to touch long series coz I fear I might lose interest midway thru & might end up thinking I wasted lots of time reading it since it often happens that authors end up adding bunch of filler scenes in between & im one who doesn’t like that.

So for the longest time I actually ignored cmi, until the amc thing came up & the some of the questions relating to the character arcs were def intriguing for me, & I thought ‘why not just give this one a go?’ The word count for cmi looked quite scary😶 so I took inspiration from seven & tried finishing from start till the recent update within seven days (…peak stupidity LoL) & GOD THE ANGST. I couldn’t help but take a blanket over my head to tear down through the rough patches that followed in midway through the fic…literally every scene was so detailed, it almost felt like I was looking at two people I closely knew & felt sorry for to suffer the miseries of being apart because of the conflicts they’d been facing.

Even if I actually succeeded in completing the 200k wc (the fastest & longest record for me) I was able to enjoy the fic. Maybe coz you actually understand the pacing of the slow burn and wrote their arcs so carefully which allowed the reader to slowly unveil their personalities, their flaws, their growth throughout the fic. I kinda skipped the drabbles in between (i did skim through but didn’t actually focus on them alot) coz the goal was to first read through the main storyline then take my time to unwind & re-read the drabbles after. Honestly this work might be my fav one from you, or any Jungkook fic I’ve read in the entirety of this website. Just wanted to say thanks for crafting such a wonderful piece of literature for us, im thrilled to read further what lays in store for jk & oc after they talked through their differences & patched up. And after reading so much pining that went behind in the past 9(?) parts, I’d actually love only fluff and warmth for this couple (me as angst enthusiast saying this✋🙂). And yes, I’m waiting for the cmi drabble (seven mv jk cross over with cmi jk is an unimaginable menace 🫠) and future parts to be posted sooner too! This couple has my heart💛

this was your first ask?! to lil ole me? 😭 omg hope you still see this one!! i wasn't around much when you sent it, then it got buried – but today i remembered it again and wanted to say hi 🥺

first of all, tysm for reading so many of my fics, and such long ones, too!! like, lmb is a huge ass piece, so im really happy you gave it a shot and enjoyed it, too 🥺 and like, same goes for cmi. it's also so lovely to know that people try out stuff on my page that they usually wouldn't – so it melts my heart that you gave cmi a chance and grew to love it as well!! angst, ikr? me too, i could live off of it :') LOL NOT THE SEVEN DAY CHALLENGE. that's actually so amusing and sweet 🤣 i know the word count is crazy and the chapters tend to get very long, but... i know i'm repeating myself, but i'm incredibly thankful that you tuned in. if you ever want, do read through the drabbles, too, since i think they give a deeper glimpse into the characters' flaws and personalities – no pressure tho!!

once again, thank you. it means the world to me to know you loved it so much. like, fav fic? please i'll sob :'') a lot of fluff incoming (but angst too, so fret not), and i truly hope you enjoy the rest as well. drop by anytime, seriously, i'd love to talk about cmi or anything with you whenever you like!! 🥺🤍

[russett-pots]

Can we have a smut based on hitomi working out and you cum on her legendary abs

Legendary Abs

Honda Hitomi

Word Count: 2.3k

Tags: Rough Sex, Ass slapping. Pussy Eating, Cum on Abs.

Well I enjoyed writing this. TBH I never thought I'll actually want to do something like this.

You check your watch—5:20 p.m. You are running down the street. You check again. It is 5:21 p.m, and you are still running down the road. Like if checking your watch multiple times is going to slow downtime.

You aren’t supposed to be late. You have never been late, usually at least. It is supposed to be your time with your client today, and she might be angry that you will make her late for her appointment.

Pilates is something you have been passionate about, and now you are supposed to be teaching one of your top clients in Tokyo, Honda Hitomi. She has a hectic schedule with being a celebrity with AKB48 and other TV shows. Her time is valuable, and you are going to waste her time.

You check your watch one more time—5:30 p.m. Finally, the door of your studio is in your grasp. Your hand grabs the handle and swings it open as your body flies to the other side. Due to the moment, you still have gone rushing to the door. 

You greet the guard at the door as your rush upstairs—each step growing louder by the second. When you reach the top floor, swing the door to your studio open and get greeted by the desk agent. But then you see Hitomi just sitting patiently on the bench waiting for you but still wearing her.

“Sorry, Hitomi, Sorry for being late.”

“That’s no problem. Plus, stop calling me Hitomi. I have been asking you to call me Tomi.”

You call her up, and you walk casually to the studio.

“So why are you late?”

“Ummm, let’s just say I got into an argument with a neighbor involving someone getting their door broken.”

Hitomi, stop and turns your head around and see a small bruise on the other side of the cheek.

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine. You should ask him. As far as I remember, his roommates tried to carry him back inside.”

“Well, if you can beat people up, I think I got the right trainer.”

“I’m not going to teach you how to beat people up.”

“Hmph.” Hitomi gets annoyed.

“Here we are. you can change in the locker room over there.”

“Hai.”

You go to the other side of the male side of the locker to get ready. You brought your bags with you—one with the equipment for the session and the other personal bag for your clothes. You swiftly change your clothes to your proper attire and place the bag inside the locker.

You suddenly hear Hitomi’s voice shout to you. “Sensei! Can you come here?”

Wait what?! Is Hitomi naked?

“Don’t worry. I have clothes on!”

You walk to the other side and see Hitomi in her leggings and only her sports bra on top. You have seen her abs before, but there is no shirt this time. It is very different to see Hitomi with her abs and without a shirt.

Your eyes just stare at her midriff. The sight of her abs mesmerizes you. Nowhere else have you seen the eleven so defined.

“Sensai?”

Hitomi’s fingers snap you out of your trance, and you get to refocus on why you are there.

“Can you help me find the box of hair ties? I can’t seem to find it.”

“Umm, sure…”

You go to her duffle bag and search for it while Hitomi double checks with her handbag to even find a single one.

While you still dig your way thru all the clothes that Hitomi packed, even if they include some panties and bras. Your cheeks turn red hot, but you ignore it as Hitomi might have been embarrassed by it.

“Sensai?”

“Hmm?”

“Were you staring at my abs?”

“What! No!”

“Come one, isn’t it obvious?”

Now you get flustered. Your cock is already growing rock hard, and now Hitomi is making it worse with her question about you being caught staring at her abs.

“Do you want me to help you find your hair ties or not?” You stop, stand up properly and look at her.

“Okay Fine. Fine, I was thinking things. I mean, your job is working if my abs are so irresistible.”

You sigh. “Fine. I did just take a peek, but I didn’t stare.”

“Sure.” Hitomi chuckles.

You just roll over your eyes, and you finally find something. It isn’t the box, but at least it is one scrunchie.

“Tomi, here.”

“Yes, Finally, we can get started.”

Hitomi exits while tying her hair while you follow and get your equipment bag. You get to the main exercise area, leading Hitomi in stretching and touching her body as the session goes on. The soft white skin is even smoother than before. You don’t know how it is, but it is more delicate than before.

“Tomi? Did you use a new soap?”

“Yup! You can tell?”

You sniff her skin, and there you can smell the papaya fragrance. The papaya extract moistens her skin, making it silky to touch.

Time goes on, and it becomes harder to concentrate on Hitomi or the clothed version. Right now, you want to rip those training clothes open and fuck her right then and there. But you have to keep in you. She is your client, and she is here to exercise, and that’s all.

Her tiny pussy isn’t meant for your large cock to destroy. Her tiny breasts aren’t meant to be eaten and devoured. Those thoughts have to be cast aside as you calm yourself down.

“Sensai?”

“Yes, Tomi?”

“Are you hard?”

You snap out of your lustful dream and come back to reality. You open your eyes and see your crotch all the way up to Hitomi’s ass.

“Uhhhh…” You get off Hitomi and take a step back for a second. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m…fine.”

Your first instinct is to bow as deep as possible and apologize immediately. “I’m sorry, Hitomi, for making you feel uncomfortable.” You say as fast as you can.

Despite her petite figure, Hitomi goes up to you, pulls your chin upwards, and looks directly into your eyes.

“I could tell you have been dreaming of me all day, but….”

“But?”

“But… I didn’t know you, and I are seeing eyes to eyes on things.”

“What do you mean? I don’t want to have sex with….”

“I never said sex. I know you want it, and I want it too.”

“Tomi, what are you planning to do?”

“Let’s say sex can also be an exercise too.”

Hitomi pushes you back at the wall and glazes at your eyes. She reaches for a kiss, but you try to refuse, but instead of giving up, she grabs your chin, makes it face her, and kisses it passionately. Your mind tells you to stop, but your body doesn’t want to.

Instead, it kissed Hitomi back, and back it went. The kiss went from smooth to rough. She bits you like as soon as your play with your tongue inside her.

You push her down to the floor with the lock unlocking your lips. You clasp your hands together and pull her arms upward. Her tiny crop top exposed the pack of abs you had seen just a while ago, and it is still so good.

You let go of her hands and kiss her from her lips to her chin to between her breasts and finally goes down on her abs.

“Tomi, I always have wanted to do this. I hope you don’t mind.”

You grab the top of her shirt and rip it open, tearing it apart like a wolf with its meat. Hitomi can only look at you and laugh. She can only imagine how long you have been desperate to have her.

“Fuck, serious What took me so long to get you, Tomi?”

“Well, I should be asking you.”

That is the question. All of the animalistic instincts now all lead up to this. The time of your life. Sex with an A-list celebrity, an A-list celebrity that has a body of a goddess. There is only a couple of these before you can finally see her body. Soon enough, they get disposed of quickly—first her sports bra. Just simply toss it away—lastly, her leggings. You slowly pull it down and remove it with her purple panties.

It is sweaty from the short workout session you have. But regardless, you want to drive and eat her pussy, and that’s what you do. First, give a good look and decide how you’ll take it. Then the plan formulates. Use your tongue and give a good lick to it, then gently use your finger to drag it between her slit. The small yet pleasurable session makes Hitomi whimper a bit. But you move in deeper.

You spread that pink flesh open and use your finger to play with it. You leave it open and allow your tongue to join it. You move your tongue up and down as you get a good taste of her. The saltiness and the girl cum that was leaking from when she was asking for you.

“Fuck, how do you know what to do?”

“Let’s say experience.”

Hitomi leans her head back as she takes in more of the pleasure. You probe in deeper and eat it out to your heart’s content. It tastes as sweet as well. Your sweet tooth pushes you more.

“Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! I’m going to cum!”

You ignore her warning but instead, your shove your finger inside and repetitively fingerfuck her pussy as fast as your can. Your middle finger is pushing as deep as it can.

Soon, enough like what she said. Hitomi did cum. She came all over your hand, face, and her crotch. The dripping liquid coats the entire area. Hitomi tries to slow down her heavy breaths. All of the surges of orgasm accelerated her heartbeat.

“You turn?”

Fuck yes. With Hitomi? You wouldn’t

 “Wanna do it slow—”

Without finishing her sentence, you pick her up and slam her back against the wall.

“Or you can do this instead?”

You grab her legs and wrap them around your waist; then you start fucking. You fuck her hard and deep. You are pushing in like you never pushed in before. You get in so deep you can feel her inside. Her walls constrict your cock as your pull in and out. But thanks to her natural lubricant, it doesn’t hinder your quest to push in.

You pick her up once more, but you use her tiny body and still fuck her like a fleshlight when walking. It feels incredible when you walk while you have this cocksleeve with you. You push her down against one of your exercise benches and spread her arms open and lick her face like she is ice cream. Her sweat may be salty, but you drink it like water. The pheromones that Hitomi emits turn into an aphrodisiac for you.

All of your basic urges just make you fuck her more. All you want to do is fuck her deeper and breed her. You toss her and make her lie on her belly. You look at her and lick your lips.

“Please, no anal.”

“Don’t worry. I don’t want anal, right. Now I want you.”

“Wait, what?!”

Without Hitomi to say anything, you start to prone bone her. She moans loudly as your groan in delight. But you worry if your assistant can hear you. So you push Hitomi’s head down to the bench. The force is so strong that her face is flat on it.

“Fuck yes. I like that hit me harder.”

You slap her ass.

“Harder.”

You slap it once more. There is a faint red mark on her ass.

“HARDER!”

You give in and slap her once more. But so hard it is bright red, and when you touch it again, it is slightly warm.

“Fuck yes, do it again if you—”

You slap her cheek again, but this time to the other side. The same red mark appears. You repetitive this several times even if there is already some blood bleeding. But you stop when you hear her moan again.

You flip her once more. Her eyes are on you. Her gaze is staring at the hungry cock penetrating as deep as possible. You cover her mouth.

“You fucking slut. Do you want to get caught or something?”

“Call me a slut one more time and scream one more time.”

You continue to push in deeper.

“Do you think I’m going to stop it, you slut. You have been hungry for my cock like I have been hungry for your pussy, and now you have to be quiet.”

She nods, but this cannot stop her from moaning. But as your last-ditch effort, you cover her mouth with your hand, sinking your fingers as deep as possible.

“Fuck Hitomi, I’m going to cum.”

You push in faster and faster like you haven’t before. You wonder where all of this energy is coming from. Maybe it is your urge to finish inside her. But Hitomi bites your hand. But you don’t remove your hand; instead, you silence her even more.

“Hitomi. It is coming.”

Hitomi bites your hand once more. This time so painful you cannot handle it anymore and remove your hand from it.

“Not inside!”

You pull and shoot your cum all over her abs. . Waves of cum coat her. The sticky white liquid enters and exits your cock like a fountain.

You breathe down and slow down yourself as your pull out. The cum slowly seeps around her.

“Fuck, that was amazing!” you exclaim.

Hitomi grabs a swipe of your cum on her abs and gives a good lick. “Yummy! Next time. I’ll tell you where to cum. I want you to cum in me. Cum in me so deep. The abs were a great idea tho. I like it.”

“Yes. Ma’am.”

Hitomi looks back at you as she walks to the shower. “My next appointment is this Saturday anyway. See you then?.”

[chippedaxe]

hello!! could i ask for a request where dream used to be a top but his ego has gotten up too high and the reader is tired of him being a bitch and decides to turn into the bitch? so it’s like sub!dream x dom!dream. i don’t really have ideas of what could happen, maybe dream won lost a manhunt and is pretty mad and yeahhh :) thank you already!

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Title: Poor Baby

Warnings: NSFW !Minor's steer clear, coarse language, praising, teasing, degrading, bit of humiliation, nipple play, fingering, anal play, begging, idk if there should be more.

Pairing: Sub! Dream X Dom! Reader

Pronouns: They/Them, non specified genitalia,

Synopsis: Dream tries to dominate you but you've had enough so you toy with Dream.

Word count: 1.5k

Note: tbh i was rlly confused so i hope this is somewhat what u wanted <3

- if it doesn't make sense like halfway thru the story then I'm rlly sorry, I wrote half of it one time and half of it another time (and I don't rlly reread or edit my work)

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Dream storms into the room looking angry, his hands have been balled into fists and you can tell that he's not thinking rationally "Dear- what's wrong? What happened, baby?" you tried to calm him down but he completely dismissed you "Take off your clothes." he ordered "excuse me?" you were taken back "come on- please just take off your clothes,, manhunt made angry.." Dream grumbled.

"Baby, just calm down.. Rest" you pulled him down onto the bed gently "Sweetheart, don't you want my cock?" Dream grabs your chin and looks into your eyes "of course I do-" he stops you right there "Then why're you being difficult?" he caresses your cheek, "Well I just feel like you're acting like a serious bitch right now" you confessed bluntly.

"Me? A bitch?" Dream groaned at your words, his hands reaching out to touch you but you stand up from the bed "Yeah. A really big bitch. So why don't you just calm down and rest, okay?" you put your hands on your hips and looked down at him "You don't give the orders okay? I give them! I'm the dominant one here!" Dream exclaimed "Then maybe I should be." you shut him down.

"What? You? Dom me? I don't think so" Dream chuckled to himself, "You think it's so funny now but wait I'm making you dizzy and seeing stars from how good I can make you feel.." you warned him "How do you expect to get me to be submissive for you?" Dream growled "Watch me." you responded as you then approached him.

You straddled his knee and crawled onto his lap, your hands moving to his chest "This is all you've got?" Dream rolled his eyes "Of course not, this isn't even close to the beginning" you leaned down to kiss his neck. You turned your head to the side and began suckling roughly on his skin, biting gently every few seconds "Ah- Yeah, keep doing that, doll." Dream tried to make it seem like he was in control but his words only affirmed your new dominant position.

"Yeah? You like it when I suck on your neck? I bet you'll like it a lot when I suck your cock too.." you tease him, your hands feeling up his chest and groping the man. "Don't tease me, or I'll punish you" Dream tried to sound scary "Punish me? But I'm being so kind, dominating you when you're clearly not fit to be on top.." you decided to bully him a little bit with some degrading words.

"Huh? What? What're you saying.." Dream started to get real riled up, his face starting to glow a bright red "What? Is my Dream angry with me?" you acted coy, kissing his jaw and pouting "Sorry Dream, I know how sensitive you are.." you teased him further "Don't make me flip you over and ram you- I will do it!" he threatened "Oh I bet you will.." your voice was condescending.

Your hands slid Dream's shirt off his body, revealing his tense muscles "Oh wow.. You look so pretty, all of this for me darling?" you cooed "Don't talk like that, I'm not you're little sub!" Dream shouted "Of course not, you're just someone who's below me and is acting quite submissive..." you pointed out. Your hands were cold, finger tips colder, pinching Dream's nipples to get a reaction out of him.

"H-uhgh..." Dream let out a small noise, his erection growing in his pants until it became a raging boner. "Aw you like when I play with your nipples? That's adorable.." you tease him as you continue to toy and play with his soft buds "n-no!" he was surely embarrassed, probably feeling humiliated. "Stop it- You're humiliating me!" Dream complained "Oh am I? You want me to stop? Then beg me, slut."

Dream went quiet and he froze up a little bit, clearly not expecting you to talk to him like that "Speak Darling, or are you too dumb?" you teased him. Dream gulped nervously and glanced up to meet your gaze "Please stop teasing me- please!" he gasped. "Okay, what do you want me to do?" you leaned over him.

Dream shuddered slightly "I want you to touch me properly!" he spoke up "What's the magic word?" you placed your hands on your hips, clearly enjoying the sudden change in superiority. "P-Please.. Please touch me, Please.." Dream groaned softly, you almost felt bad from the way he was begging you. Almost.

You looked down at him, his cock twitched in his pants, growing harder against the tight fabric "It hurt's so bad.. Please help me.." Dream hugged you and hung his head on your shoulder. "Okay baby, I'll help you.." you unzipped his pants just a bit so you could slip your hand in to palm him gently.

"Ah- I need more.. Please.." Dream bucked his hips up against your hand, desperately trying to grind against you but to no avail. "Be patient darling" you hushed him up and pulled his penis out, stroking his length gently. You admired the way it throbbed in your hand, twitching slightly as Dream rolled his head back and groaned "You're not usually this vocal, something change?" you smirked at him.

"That feels so good, so good.." Dream rolled his hips against you, legs closing together to give him a little more friction "Uh uh- open up." you slapped his thigh which made him open them back up reluctantly. You wanted to give in and let Dream fuck your insides but you fought the urges, today you were going to fuck him instead.

You took off his pants finally, letting the blonde boy relax more. "I'm gonna try something new with you, alright?" you didn't give Dream much time to answer as your hand dipped down between his legs, one of your fingers thrusting into his tight hole. "Ah! I- I've never touched there before!" Dream was feeling a little bit shy clearly.

"Your walls are sucking my fingers in so well, oh my god.. I should definitely buy a dildo or something for you.." you thought out loud to yourself. Dream quivered underneath you, his hole clenching around your finger at the thought of you fucking him with a toy. "M- More.." he was definitely feeling ashamed, his head turned away to face the wall.

You gave him what he wanted and stuck a second finger inside, curling them gently to press against his prostate. Dream squealed and covered his mouth to hide his lewd noises "Hands off." you instructed "But-" he protested "But nothing, hands off yourself or I'll stop touching you" you argued. Dream swallowed his pride and removed his hands, letting out a loud sound when your fingers thrusted deeper inside of him.

"Do you like this?" you asked "Of course- It feels so sO good!" Dream cried out "You like it more than when I play with your penis?" you questioned, Dream nodded and bit on his lip to keep quiet "So.. You'd let me do this again sometime?" you were starting to feel really excited "W-Whenever you want!!" Dream was now completely your bitch.

"I-I think I'm gonna cum, it feels sO weird!" Dream babbled on and on "Nuh uh- not unless you say you're my bitch." you wanted desperately to hear him say those little words "What??" you slowed down your pace and started to gently remove your fingers "No- No! I-I'm your bitch! I said it! I'm your bitch! Now please let me cum!" he bawled.

"Good boy.." You sped it up, not giving any mercy to his ass as you finger fucked him. "AH! I'm cumming! FUCK!" he arched his back, walls convulsing around your fingers as his hot white liquid spat out of his cock and ran down his legs. "Dirty slut, go clean yourself up" you snickered down at him before pulling your fingers out of his ass and leaving the bedroom.

You're not a monster so you obviously won't just be leaving him there, although it's not like you're gonna help him much. You grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge and came back to hand it to him, he weakly reached out to grab the bottle but dropped it "Don't tell me.. Does my little slut need help drinking from a bottle? Pathetic.." you spat at him before drinking some of the water.

You grabbed his chin and opened it gently, spitting your water into his mouth for him to swallow. Dream gulped it down and flushed a deep red, "Thank you.." he thanked you and was flustered. "No problem, I love you baby." you kissed his cheek "I love you too, thank you for taking care of me today.. I think I liked it better when you were in charge.." Dream admitted "I was thinking the same thing, sweetheart" you smiled at him.

[jaykaycreates]

Nightmares and Memories: Bravery

--

In the room that once was inhabited by Splicers now sits the Crown of Sorrows, infesting the space with its poisonous egregore. Thoriks stands before it, her mind imagining the worst as she waits with her head down. She then sees a blue hue brighten the surrounding area; lifting her head, she sees the visage of her long-dead brother, no longer in his Devil splicer gear but in rags similar to hers.

"Sister," He says, his arms behind his back as he looks down at her.

Thoriks is speechless; the ritual worked. She stands up, her SIVA prothetic creaks of old wear and tear. "Tarikks"

She can't think what to say to him; would it even matter? This wasn't really him, just a memory of him. It's not like-

"Glad to see nothing has changed, mind racing as usual. I wonder what more glorious ideas you will come up with next."

Her thoughts were interrupted and brought to focus on him. He sounded so much like him.

"I-I I'm sorry."

"What for?" He asks, floating down to her level and leaning over, meeting eyes to eyes.

"I was-was a coward, If I had finished, If I hadn't hesitated. Then m-maybe you would've survived, maybe you would ha-"

"Stop"

He says to her, stopping her rambling as she holds back tears.

"My sister was never a coward."

"But-But I!"

"You knew that you couldn't augment me in time."

"I could've tried! I JUST STOOD THERE AND FROOZE" She shouts at him, tears streaming from her four eyes down her mandibles.

"You knew that if you went farther, who I was would've been lost. You knew this, and you knew what I was asking, would risk getting rid of who I was." "Why do you deny what you know?"

"I-I don't, I don't rem- I" She stutters, unable to form a sentence, her memory that only showed the worst of the past shows that he is right. Those thoughts did race thru her mind in those moments in surgery. Those moments where she had to be slow and careful not to let the SIVA overtake his brother, the moments she saved his life from being lost.

"Well, even-even so! When the Guardian came, I didn't even fight! I-I just hid!" She says, in an attempt to win this argument, trying to convince him and herself that she is the coward she believes she is.

"I locked you in a room." She knew that was true already.

"You let your mistakes hang over your head, letting them control you who you are. You are no coward for taking precautions, for being scared. Every creature gets scared."

He places a hand on her shoulder, it phases thru, but she can still feel his warmth.

"A coward doesn't go out to skirmishes with a team of guardians against the Vex. A coward doesn't attempt to save humans during the Vex incursion all those months ago. A coward wouldn't stand up for her people, the people that ostracise her, to the more...vocal among the humans. A coward wouldn't be considering asking a certain human for a lifelong bond, hmm?"

Thoriks jumps back; if Eliksni could blush, her cheeks would glow as red as her eyes.

Tarikks chuckles loud

"You are no coward, sister; you are one of the bravest Eliksni I know. I just hope you will believe it as I did."

Thorikks tilts her head down, her mind racing in thought; she feels the warmth and glow of the memory fade, leaving her alone in that cursed room. She exits thru the corridor, limping past the two centurians. She felt their gaze on her SIVA prosthetics. Usually, she hid them from others' sight; she did not care anymore.

She reaches the central hub of the HELM and sees Aliyah leaning against a wall, looking at a datapad while she is waiting for Thoriks to return. She looks up to see Thoriks sheepishly approaching.

"How'd it go?!" She says excitedly

"It was... Enlightening, um, I have much. To think about." Thoriks looks towards the stairs leading back toward the room, considering the words Tarikks spoke to her carefully.

"Good thoughts, I hope." She wraps an arm around Thoriks back to rest a hand on her shoulder. Thoriks can feel her bicep flex against the back of her head.

"Yes.." She doesn't move; she stands lost in thought before her eyes widen with an idea.

'I would like to go somewhere, I want... I want to do something for my brother, an old human tradition I read about." She looks up to Aliyah, who smiles back at her and opens her mouth like she is about to speak, and Thoriks interrupts her. "I wou-would like you to accompany me if you would like to, that is." For once, Aliyah doesn't speak, at least for a moment.

"Sure! I'd love to! Where are we heading to?"

"The Plaguelands..."

"Oh, you always take me to the most interesting places." She says with sarcasm which Thoriks is slowly starting to understand.

Aliyah pulls Thoriks close into a hug before transmatting them back to Aliyah's ship, heading off together towards the Plaguelands.

--

[joansiefics]

CRASH, BOOM, BAM!!

MOSTLY BUCKY BARNES X READER

SUMMARY: You and your parents got in a car accident, while on your way to a holiday resort. You had several injuries, but your parents weren't so lucky. Luckily Tony, Natasha and Bucky saw the accident happen and helped you.

WARNING: Death (of family members), Car Accident, Blood, Injuries (cuts, concussion...), Crying over death, Held back against will (actually helps the reader), Nightmares, Blaming self.

REQUESTS are OPEN

MARVEL MASTERLIST

Add Yourself To My Taglist

“

”

You let out a satisfied sigh as you snuggle deeper into your makeshift car bed. The air in the car was stilled and you focused on the acceleration of the car as your dad made a turn onto the quiet highway, the broadcaster keeping himself awake with his own silly jokes and the light stertor breathing of your mother sleeping in the pushed back passenger seat, all cozy and cuddled up in her heated blanket. You squinted your eyes open as the winter sun was shining morning rays through snow clouded skies onto your face and you welcomed the slightly warmer feeling on your skin.

You let out a groan as you reposition yourself to let your numb side sensitize. "How'd you sleep?" you hear your dad's gruff, hoarse voice move through the stilled air.

"It was good, but my left side is entirely numb" you answer with a chuckle.

You mother utters a few tired and dreamful mumbles as the tyres slide on the road soothing her back into a light slumber. "I was thinking we could stop at a chick-fil-a for some breakfast before we drive the last few hours, what do you say?" your face lit up at his suggestion

"That sounds amazing, I could do with some food" your stomach growls in agreement with your statement.

It didn't take long before you saw a part of the red logo in contrast against the white, sheet of clouds, excitement bubbling in the pit of your empty, growling stomach. A few more miles covered and your dad was pulling into the drive -thru. The lady at the last window stretched her arm out, handing your dad the paper bag filled with deliciousness. The heavenly smell of waffle fries, chicken nuggets and sandwiches reaching your nostrils and making your mouth water. The smell made your mother stir, before she tiredly opened her eyes, searching for the source of the appetizing smell. Your dad handed the paper bag over to you, for you to pick out your food and you gave the paper bag to your mother, after taking your chicken nuggets, waffle fries and bacon, egg and cheese sandwich.

Your dad ate his food while keeping his tired eyes trained on the road as he drove. Your mother sat up and nibbled on some of her waffle fries, while you quickly devoured your portions of food, but still savoring every taste on your taste buds. You finished the last bite of your sandwich, wiped your hands and corners of your mouth with a napkin and put the rubbish in the now foodless, full of trash, paper bag.

"Thank you dad" you thank before plopping back down on your back.

"You're welcome".

The car became silent once more and your eyelids grew heavier, the exhaustion of a term's hard work and determination finally taking over. You can hear the whispers of your parents trying to have a conversation without disturbing you, the sleet pattering on the window, the soft tunes form the radio and the gusts of wind as other cars dangerously speed past yours, lulling you to sleep. You could vaguely here the conversation between your parents.

"Do -- want me -- take over ---- bit, honey?" some of your mother's caring words reached your ears as she asked your father.

"No, -- fine"

"Honey, -- been driving -- eight hours and ---- awake even longer ----, maybe -- should let me take -- wheel ---- bit, while you ---- rest?" your mother's voice was filled with concern.

"I'll stop at -- next gas station, -- we -- switch, okay?" your dad gave into the offer, the thought of sleep to good to turn down.

"I love you guys" you mutter from the backseat, a smile tugging at your lips, satisfied with the perfect life and loving and caring parents.

"Love you too" your parents said in unison, enlisting a small giggle to tumble over your lips - maybe a giggle of happiness, maybe a giggle of satisfaction, or maybe a last giggle before a storm, before a teared world, before the ruining of a perfect life.

The next line of events was all a big blur to you. You remember you were happy, smiling and giggling before you fell asleep, but you woke up with your head spinning 'It feels more like my whole body is spinning' and sharp pains running through your legs 'Did I sleep my legs into feeling numb again?' and then came the realization - you were thrown from one side of the car to another and crashed through the window as the car tumbled down a hill. You were scared, confused and anguished. But then it hit you...your parents - where are they? are they okay?

"Mom?! Dad?!" you called, your voice faltering, shaking and small.

You tried again "Mom!! Dad!!" - nothing.

By now the adrenaline was surging and pumping through your blood, filling your veins, the pain slightly dissipating as the only thought was your parents. As you took in your surroundings you noticed the thick, cold snow you were laying in with your left cheek sunken deeply into it, the snowflakes falling on you and the location of the car crash, which was at the bottom of a steep hill, a few meters away from you.

With every last bit of energy you push yourself onto your feet and trudge towards the wreck, trying to lift your feet as high as possible to escape the deep snow. You want to run to see if your parents are okay, but even though the adrenaline is anaesthetizing any feeling of discomfort or pain, you feel out of control of your own body. 'I'm useless, my parents might need my help and here I am, taking my sweet time getting to them.'  

Arriving at the wreck, you fall to your knees, next to the crumbled car. The stinging of the wet and cold, icy snow going unnoticed as you try to spot your parents in the battered car. "Mom!!!!" You call out with a tremble in your voice and a lump forming in your throat. "Dad!!!!!" The stinging tears in the back of your eyes escaping a bit through your lacrimal duct, almost freezing to your numb, rosy cheeks.

Through your blurry vision you can make out your mother's figure hurled against the dashboard. The mere thought of your mother being injured, pumps regenerated adrenaline through your tired body and out of utter impulsiveness you push half of your body through the hole where a window used to be. The few remaining shards of glass stuck to the side, slices the material of your shirt. "Mom!!! You gotta wake up...please!!!" You try grasping her shoulders with your numbed hands, shaking her vividly.

The overcharge of blood rushing to your possibly concussed head and overflow adrenaline causes a buzzing in your ears, blocking out the slushing of the oncoming car's tyres in the snow. "Mom, please... open y-your eyes" You beg with quivers. The panic only seeps deeper into your already thumping heart when you don't feel a pulse on your mother's wrist. "No, no, no, no, this can't be happening" You mutter to yourself, moving your tremulous hand to the main artery in her neck, desperately searching for even the slightest pulse.

Temporarily giving up on your mother, you try wiggling yourself further through the hole to your father, but with no use when a strong pair of arms snake around your waist, pulling you out of the car. "No!!! I have to get to him!!! Please!!!" You cry out to the stranger, but you only get pulled further from your parents with you struggling against the stranger's grip. You kick and twist trying to free yourself while the sobs break through your chest. The adrenaline is now ineffective, making you feel exhausted - drained - and the pain stimulus finally reaches your brain, making you whimper a bit.

Over your heaving and the still, slight, present buzzing in your ears you can hear sirens nearing your location. You are now almost fully depending on the stranger to hold you on your shaking, glass shard invested, legs. You can hear someone talking to the stranger holding you "I ask-- Jarvis -- scan their vital- ---- --- dead." You try to piece the snippets of vaguely heard conversation together, which makes bile rise to your throat and you concentrate hard to swallow it back down. 'I could be wrong, I mean I only heard some of the conversation...yep, I'm DEFINITELY wrong' you try to convince yourself.

The tightening of the arms around your waist pull you out of your internal reassurance. All senses heightened you perceive the snow, in which your knees somehow came to sink in, feeling like a fire blistering any skin it comes in contact with, the talking of the few men, clad in blue uniforms, deafening you, as the wheels of the gurney whooshes through the snow as they take your parents to the ambulance - "my parents" - you say hushed, more to yourself than anyone else. The pair of sturdy arms turn you around and one hand comes up to the back of your head, gently nudging it forward into the stranger's chest, blocking all the view from your parents' figures covered by white sheets.

The steady heart beat, of the stranger, eliminates the chaos around you and in that moment it's just you and the kind stranger, in whose arms you feel safe. The calmness settles in you - the silence before the storm - the calmness before the reality. A few more minutes pass with the stranger holding you in their arms stroking your tangled, snowflake invaded hair when the shock enters, destroying all calmness. If you were standing your knees would have buckled, but you were already sitting with your knees in the snow leaning back on your ankles.

The sadness is to overwhelming, holding back all the tears and only making dry sobs leave your body. "They are gone" You say disbelievingly, shaking your head in slow horizontal directions. "I'm really sorry for your loss" this is the first time you hear the stranger's voice, but you like it - it produces a certain serenity, perfect for the situation. You pull away from the stranger and he removes his arms from your waist, and you almost instantly miss the feeling of comfort. "Thank you for uhhh..." you pause a bit, trying to collect yourself "thanks" you get the only word out that you can think of suitable, while pushing yourself to your feet. The man also pushes himself to his feet, brushing of the snow from his pants.

"Bucky" he introduces himself, sticking his hand out for you to shake. There is a small silence before you reach out, shaking his hand "Y/N" "We should probably get your wounds checked out, it looks kinda bad" Bucky says sincerely. You haven't even given thought to your injuries, you were solemnly focused on your parents - 'they're REALLY gone' - your mind begins spiraling again. Bucky rests his flesh hand on your shoulder, preventing you to give into your spiraling thoughts, and usher you towards a car. "My friends and I are going to take you to our infirmary where we live. You'll get better treatment there." Bucky keeps talking to you, trying to keep you from dazing.

In any other situation you would have had questions: 'where do you live? how can I trust you? who are your friends?'  But in this case it's different: I just lost my parents and nothing can be worse than that, what do I have to live for now?' The opening of a car door, breaks through your thoughts and you hesitate a moment before you silently climb into the backseat, Bucky following right behind you. The contrast of the freezing weather outside and the heated air in the car, sends a shiver of pleasure through your spine. "These are my friends, Natasha and Tony" Bucky introduces the two people sat in the front of the car, pointing to each of them when saying their names "this is Y/N" he tells them, pointing to you. You didn't even notice there were people in the car, until Bucky introduced you to each other.

'Say something' you mentally scold yourself for your awkwardness "hey, nice to meet you...thanks for, uhh, you know what" you say. "No problem sweetie, anytime" Natasha says with a soft smile, before turning around and focusing in front of her. The shock, adrenaline rush and fuzzy brain definitely took a toll on you causing your eyelids to feel heavy, fluttering closed, before you force them open again "Get some sleep doll" Bucky says, hugging you closer to his warm body. Without having to tell you twice, you let your eyelids close, only this time you keep them closed.

After a long drive, of which you have no recollection, the car pulls up to the tower. Bucky picks you up in his arms, careful not to push any glass shards deeper than they already are, and carries you to the infirmary, swiftly but steady. The entire time that the doctors treat your wounds, Bucky stays by your side and after an hour the doctors and nurses leave the room, satisfied with their work.

The annoying beeping of a heart monitor, the bright fluorescent light hurting your eyes even through closed eyelids, the tight skin around the penetrating IV and the bandages almost, not quite, but almost stopping all blood flow through your veins, wake you up from your sleep. The light hurts your eyes but you force them to stay open and scan your surroundings. "B-Bucky" you ask unsure with a hoarse throat "Your awake" he says cheerfully, grabbing a drink of water. He gently puts one hand at the back of your head, slowly pushing it up and putting the brim of the glass to your lips. You take a few small sips, letting it soothe your dry throat before you thank him for the water.

Bucky rests your head onto the pillows again and makes his way back to the chair he's been sitting on for about an hour. After a long silence in the room, but constant debating with yourself, in your head, you ask the question that has been floating in your mind. "What's going to happen now? I mean like...with me? Where do I go?" you rush through your questions almost forgetting to fill your lungs with oxygen. The heart monitor beeping rapidly and the lines spiking as your heart's rhythm increases "Hey, hey, hey, calm down...okay? Just breathe for me." Bucky waits for you to calm your breathing before he continues "For now, you're just going to heal. Once you're all healed, we can contact some of your relatives, maybe you can stay with them" Just the mentioning of staying with one of your immoral relatives cause goosebumps to form on your skin. "Our umm...my relatives? they don't really like us...me, they don't really like me" you say, confusion clear on your face as you try to correct your sentence. "Well then, you can stay here at the tower, with me..." Bucky suggests, quickly adding "that's only if you want to" not wanting to push you into anything. "Yeah, I...I'd like that" you say with a smile tugging at your lips.

"Why don't you get some more rest and we can talk again in the morning, finalize all the plans and so forth?" Bucky says when he sees your eyes drooping and your best efforts to hide your yawns. "Okay, thank you again Bucky, it really means a lot to me" You say already closing your eyes "Goodnight doll" He leans forward pressing a kiss to your forehead "Goodnight Bucky" He walks back to his seat and plops himself down, getting comfy for the night.

' "I love you guys" "We love you too, Y/N" and then *CRASH*...glass shatters everywhere, penetrating any flesh in its way. I feel the tingling as the blood drips from the lacerations on my arms and legs. But then I remember, my parents, "Mom, Dad!!!!" I see their lifeless, covered in blood, bodies against the dashboard. Then I hear my mother mumble the last few words, coughing on her own blood, spewing it onto her clothes "You... could have...saved us...Y/N" and then she exhales her last breath. '

You scream yourself awake and jolt up on the gurney. Sweat is dripping down the side of your forehead, your breathing is hitched and the heart monitor is screaming at you, trying to pull you back to reality. The last string of your daze snaps as a strong pair of arms wrap around you for the second time that day. "It was just a nightmare" Bucky cooes softly into your ear, swaying you back and forth on the gurney. "It wasn't just a nightmare, it was real" you pant, the words of your imagination mother replaying in your head 'You could have saved us Y/N'

"I could have saved them Bucky" you whisper into his chest "You couldn't do anything Y/N" "I could have..." you pause trying to think what you could have done. You know it's your mind playing tricks on you, you know your mother would never say such a thing, but you still can't ignore it. "You could have what?" Bucky asks, trying to lure you into accepting that you couldn't do anything. "I could have...I don't know" you sigh giving in with no answers "You couldn't do anything, okay?" Bucky waits for you to voice your acceptance "O-okay" you answer. "Just try and sleep some more, I'll be right here when you wake up doll" Bucky settles in next to you on the narrow gurney hugging you tighter to his chest, breathing exaggerated breaths for you to follow.

Falling asleep again you didn't have any nightmares - maybe the last time that you wouldn't get nightmares, well at least for now. But Bucky would always be there, by your side, swaying you to calmness and holding you to his chest - the chest of the once stranger that held you tight on the day of THE awful incident.

[meltwonu]

| 𝔲𝔫𝔱𝔦𝔩 𝔦 𝔪𝔢𝔱 𝔶𝔬𝔲 |     [CHAPTER 3]

pairing; fratboy!wonwoo x reader

this chapter’s notes; fratboy!wonwoo, possessive!dom!wonwoo, daddy!kink, sex toys, dirty talk, squirting, fingering, oral(fem receiving), sexy aftercare! YALL WHAT A WEEK EH? 🥴 I’m exhausted and about to sleep thru the entire weekend(in actuality☠️) fkjhsdh Will try to answer inbox msgs if I’m not too tired(if I am, def sunday!)💕💕💕 and maybe thirst posts in between sleep if I can! 😗 Exciting!! I’m trying to be a bit more active, at least on the weekends lol baby steps!!😭💕 Anyway, I hope y’all have a lovely weekend~ Enjoy ch 3! I love u!! 💕

chapters; 1 - 2 - 3 - x - x

“Is this… It?”

Wonwoo laughs; the smell of alcohol on his lips when he leans towards you. “No, I just thought we’d have a little fun before I gave you your real present later, is all.”

The party had ‘started’ at least an hour ago and Wonwoo, despite his dislike of parties, was already three drinks in by the time you were knocking on the front door of the loud frat house. He’d dragged you to the kitchen to make you a drink while you chatted with others for a bit before he was tugging you up the stairs and into his room.

“Unless you don’t wanna play, ‘cause that’s okay too.”

He twirls the vibrating panties around his index finger - head tilted slightly in your direction. You roll your eyes in return, reaching for the fabric as you lean in closer to his warmth. “Me? Not wanting to play? Do you even know me?” You quip back, already taking the fabric from between his fingertips as you reach under your skirt to start removing your panties to replace them with the ones Wonwoo had given you.

Biting his lip, he watches as you slowly slide your panties down your legs. “I’m trying to get to know you.” He mumbles - more to himself than to you but the slight giggle he hears from you lets him know that you heard him perfectly clear.

“I know. Although, let’s be real, we haven’t done much talking, huh?”

Wonwoo’s lips purse into an embarrassed smile; cheeks a pale pink when you finish changing and toss him your old panties.

“We can go on a date? Tomorrow? Sunday?” He offers - taking the fabric and putting it in his pants pocket for keeps.

Nodding, you reach for his hand, squeezing it before linking your fingers with his.

“Let’s figure it out when you’re not already 3 drinks in, hmm?”

You catch up and surpass Wonwoo’s level of drunkenness in no time; taking shots with Soonyoung before Wonwoo can finally catch you.

“H-hey!” The room spins as Wonwoo grabs your arm and you find yourself in the familiar empty kitchen as your eyes try to adjust to the brightness. “I was, hic, gonna drink another s-shot!”

“I know, but you need water and I’ve been trying to get you to drink some for the last 25 minutes.”

“Daddy, why’re you so meaaaaan…”

Wonwoo pauses, fingers frozen on the bottle cap before he turns to you. He hands you the bottle silently before reaching for his phone - eyes on you as you start to down the contents.

It only takes a few seconds before the vibrations start and you’re taken by surprise as you sputter and spill water all over the countertop and floor.

“Good girls know when to behave. And you’re not doing so well right now, sweetheart.”

Your thighs clamp together, fingertips almost crushing the plastic bottle as the vibrations send thrums of arousal pouring over your body in an instant. “Ah, I--hic, wh--what, but--but I…” The alcohol makes your body much more sensitive and your head feels hazy and overwhelmed with the toy pressed firmly against your clit. “Buh--but I just wanted to d-drink…”

“And I wanted you to drink some water and you ran to take shots, princess.”

Pouting, you shakily place the half empty bottle down onto the counter before you walk up to Wonwoo. You wrap your arms around his waist, quiet moans rolling off your lips as you stare up at his intoxicated expression. “Well, I was trying to until you decided to make me spill it...”

Wonwoo’s soft laughter reverberates in your chest and he’s quick to turn off the toy as you slump against him.

“Can we go back up to your room now, daddy?” Your voice is slightly slurred and muffled against his shirt; eyes fluttering shut as you inhale his addicting scent.

“Now where’d all the fun be in that, princess?”

Throughout the night, Wonwoo sporadically turns the toy on - making you jolt and latch onto the nearest person or object as your legs threaten to give out when he doesn’t always start off with the lowest setting.

“Whoa, you okay?” Mingyu asks, brows furrowed when your vice-like grip on his arm only tightens as Wonwoo sets the vibration speed higher. “You look like you’re gonna be sick. You might wanna slow down on those drinks.” Minghao nods in agreement, stepping closer to you to place a hand against your warm forehead.

“She’s kinda warm too. Must be all the alcohol.”

The pair nod to each other, convincing themselves it was all the drinks as Wonwoo shoots you a cocky smirk. You shift your weight to your left leg, making the toy sit perfectly against your clit in the process. The wetness in your panties was already unbearable and it was only getting worse.

“Fu--fuck… I’m okay, just---um, I think I need to go to the restroom.” You excuse yourself just as Wonwoo turns the toy off again and you pry your sweaty palm off of Mingyu’s arm before making a beeline for the restroom down the hall. Naturally, there’s a small line to get in and despite the fact you don’t really need to go, you figure splashing some water on your face would help you a little.

“My, my, who do we have here?”

It’s a voice you don’t recognize and when you lift your head to face the person in front of you, it’s a male you don’t know either. “Um… Can I… Help you?” You ask meekly. He’s very obviously inebriated, eyes unfocused as he gives you a once over before licking his lips.

“D’you wanna go in together? You can help me in there if you’d like.”

You can only grimace - fully ready to give him a piece of your mind when an arm slings around your shoulder and you feel yourself being tucked protectively into Wonwoo’s side.

“Sorry, but she’s going to be helping me right now, won’t you, princess?”

The tenseness in Wonwoo’s jaw is ever present even when he’s situated between your trembling thighs - the tip of his tongue running through your soaked folds before he slightly pulls away.

“Wanted to play with you downstairs a little longer but, ah, well… Isn’t this more fun, princess?”

“A-ah, will they b-be mad you’re, mmh, ditching your own p-party though…?” Wonwoo grins, eyes peering up at your slightly unfocused stare and your swollen lips.

“I don’t even think they noticed I was gone, sweetheart.”

Wonwoo leans in, dragging his tongue from your clit to your entrance as slowly as possible as you whine and start to ease your fingertips into his hair. “Oh, d-daddy…” You tug slightly, pulling him closer towards you as you start to grind against his waiting tongue.

“Oh, god, it feels s-so good… Been w-waiting for you to, ah, t-touch me all night…” He moves slow, circling your clit with his tongue before sucking the nub into his mouth. Garbled noises spill from your lips - mixing in with soft pleas for him to do more.

But despite Wonwoo’s original annoyance of someone else trying to hit on you, that being the reason he even decided to leave the party, he finds it all melting away the second you start moaning his name in pleasure.

He dips his tongue into your entrance, collecting the wetness on it as he moans against your skin at how sweet you taste. It sends shivers up your spine - toes curling and hips bucking up towards his mouth as you chase the feeling. “Wonwoo… D-daddy, more… Ah, please, w-wanna feel your f-fingers too…”

“Fucked your pretty ‘lil cunt so good yesterday and you’re still so needy, huh, princess?” He reaches his hand in between your legs, popping his fingers into his wet mouth before running them through your folds.

“So greedy. Always want your cunt stuffed full of me, hmm? Whether it’s my cock or my fingers. Even just having my tongue on you is enough to get you to cum.” Once he deems his fingers wet enough, he positions his index and middle finger at your entrance before he starts to slowly sink them both inside of you. “Pretty ‘lil cunt is always ready to take my cock, isn’t it?”

You’re so wet that his fingers slide in easily; already curling into your g-spot as you cry loudly into the air. “O-oh, fuck! Daddy, please…!” Letting go of Wonwoo’s hair, you opt to tangle your fingers into his bed sheets - simultaneously spreading your quivering legs further apart when he starts to thrust his fingers into you at a moderate pace.

“Please? Please what, sweetheart? Use your words.”

Wonwoo scissors his fingers, stretching your pussy open as you throw your head back against his pillows. “Ngh, want y-you to fuck me, ah, d-daddy… Wanna feel your cock i-inside…” He smiles, leaning back in to pepper kisses on your inner thighs before you feel his tongue on your clit again.

He flicks the nub with the tip of his tongue at the same time he curls his fingers into your g-spot, sending your overly sensitive body hurtling towards an orgasm as you whine and mewl above him.

“D-daddy… I c-can’t, I--ah!”

Your walls clamp down hard onto his fingers; entire body trembling as you cum on his fingers and his tongue. And he works you through it - curling and wiggling his fingers inside your pussy to milk your orgasm.

“Mm, now you’re even more wet, princess~ Ready to take my cock?” Your head is buzzing, fingertips loosening their grip on the bed sheets when he slowly starts to pull his fingers from inside of you. “Mmhmm… Ah, hurry d-daddy… fuh--feels so e-empty…”

Wonwoo slowly sits up from between your legs; popping the wet digits into his mouth to lick off your wetness.

“So insatiable.”

You realize when Wonwoo positions his cock at your entrance that this is truly the first time you get to see his naked body since he’d come back.

“Daddy, I--”

The words get caught in your throat as he swiftly bottoms out in a singular thrust; his abs tightening and showing off his toned muscles as you feel yourself start to drool over his physique.

You tell yourself to ask him for pictures later, if you can remember.

The oversensitivity in your body makes you whimper and you’re quick to wrap your legs around his waist when he starts a moderately quick pace.

“Fuck, you’re so pretty, sweetheart.” Admittedly, Wonwoo knows he won’t be able to hold out for very long himself - already too aroused to stave off his orgasm for much longer with your slick walls sucking his cock in deeper. “And you’re all mine, right?”

You nod back frantically, bleary eyes peering up at Wonwoo’s own blown out pupils. “Ngh, y-yes, fuck! I’m, hah, y-yours… God, I don’t wan’t a-anyone, ah, else, daddy…”

Your words go straight to his cock as he growls, “That’s right. Only daddy gives you what you want, right, princess? Only my cock satisfies you the way you want - filling you up to the brim and keeping you full, just how you like it.”

“Mmh, oh g-god, Wonwoo…” Whines pour from your mouth as you dig your heels into his lower back to press him closer into you. 

His cock grazes against your cervix as you mewl; back arching off the bed with how deep he was fucking you.

He uses a free hand to reach down to your clit, rubbing the swollen, sensitive nub between his fingertips as you immediately latch a shaky hand onto his forearm. “P-please, oh, mmh!”

Wonwoo smirks, watching as your eyes cross from the immense pleasure pouring over your body. “C’mon, princess. Wanna feel you cumming on my cock again before I fill this filthy ‘lil cunt of yours with cum.”

You’re reduced to rushed, broken cries of his name as the pressure builds inside your body quickly; only a loud gasp falling from your lips as the tension snaps for a second time, only this time, much stronger than the first.

“Fuck, that’s right, cum for me, baby.”

He works you through your orgasm, fucking you harder as you squirt all over his lower half and the bed sheets.

 Drool dribbles down your chin, thighs shaking uncontrollably when Wonwoo pulls all the way out to tap the head of his cock against your sensitive clit - making your body jolt with each slap before he’s quickly sheathing his throbbing cock back inside your tight cunt.

“God, you’re so tight and wet, princess. Bet you feel so fuckin’ good, huh?” Wonwoo licks his lips, “Gonna cum inside your pretty ‘lil cunt now, okay?”

You nod, lips parted in quiet moans when you feel his thick cock throbbing between your walls. “H-hurry, give it to me, d-daddy… Wanna feel y-you, ah, cumming inside my p-pussy…”

He only groans in return, letting the pleasure wash over him as his orgasm starts to crest. 

This time, you work him through it - clenching around his cock as he continues to thrust into you. “Mmh... suh--so good...” You slur out; head fuzzy as you bathe in the post orgasmic haze. 

And Wonwoo fares no better - fingertips digging into your skin as he rides out his high. 

“Oh... fuck.” 

When you come to, it doesn’t even fully process to you what’d happened.

“Sweetheart? Princess? Baby?” 

Wonwoo’s voice sounds muffled as you try to sit up, but he’s quick to slow you down as he sighs. “Ah, not--not so fast. You just passed out, I was... really scared for a second there, sweetheart.” He leans in close, checking your eyes before gently stroking your cheek. “Are you okay? Feeling faint? Does your head hurt? Or any part of you, really.” 

“I--I don’t even remember that happening... Just, you were cumming and then everything went... dark.” You shake the tension from your body - already noting that you were re-dressed in your panties and one of Wonwoo’s big shirts. “I... Well, I’m not drunk anymore?” 

He shakes his head as you laugh airily; trying to ease his nerves. “Baby, are you sure you’re okay?” The ‘baby’ makes your heart jump as you mumble a shy ‘mmhmm’ back. 

“Okay, now you really need to drink some water. I got you cleaned up while you were out and put you in some warm clothes. I’ll grab you something to eat from downstairs in a bit, I’m sure there’s boxes of pizza still down there.” Wonwoo grabs a water bottle from the nightstand, handing it to you as he sits by your side. “I haven’t even given you your actual gift and you already passed out once for the night.” 

Gently slapping his arm, you down half the water bottle before you pass it back to him. 

“Can I still have it or will it also make me pass out again?” 

This time, the two of you share a laugh as he gets up from the bed and walks over to his dresser to fetch a small box. “I mean, I guess it depends on how you see it?” 

He passes you the small box - slightly nervous when you start to inspect it. 

“You’re not trying to pull a Van Gogh moment with a cut off piece of ear or something are you?” Wonwoo laughs; loud and exaggerated. 

“Sadly not. But open it, I think you’ll like it.” 

You start opening the small box, pulling away the layers of printed tissue paper to reveal a set of two keys. “Keys?” 

“Mmhmm.” 

“To... The library?” 

Wonwoo snorts, doubling over in laughter as he slaps his leg. “N-no... A key for the frat house and a key... for my bedroom. So you can have access here whenever you want. Or need, really.” 

You’re taken by surprise as you dangle the keys in front of your face; cheeks warming up at the fact Wonwoo essentially gave you keys to his private space. “I--Wow, I--Wonwoo... This, wow... I don’t know what to say.” 

“Good or bad?” 

“G-good! Really really good but just... are you sure?” 

He nods back - shy eyes avoiding the way you stare at him. 

“I--I want to trust you more and I want you to trust me too. You don’t have to give me keys to your place or anything at all. I just want you to know that you have a place here if you want to study or just chill. I don’t have a big work load this semester so I’m in here a lot anyway. And let’s be real, we can’t alway mess around in the library, right?”

 He chuckles gently under his breath, “But we can play all we want in here.” 

You nod, mentally contemplating whether or not to do the same. 

I’ll think about it later, you tell yourself.

“What if wanna just sleep here with you, hmm? Nothin’ sexy.” You ask, twirling the keys around your finger. 

“You can do that. I’d like that actually. Why don’t we do that tonight, huh, baby? Stay the night and then we can go out for breakfast in the morning.”

Biting your lip, you place the keys back into the box before setting it on the nightstand. “I’d like that too.” 

Wonwoo gets up from the bed, dusting off his sweats before readjusting his glasses. 

“For now, I think you need to eat some cold pizza from downstairs. I’ll be right back, okay?”

“Okay~”

[kindahoping4forever]

...Ready For It? // Ashton Irwin

Thank you to everyone who said they wanted to read this story, whether it was in the poll I posted 12 hours ago or when I first posted In My Dreams... You Should See The Things We Do back in June (!) - I actually started working on this not that long after I posted and while the skeleton concept stayed the same, everything else was kind of fluid until last month when I finally felt satisfied with it. As always, thank you to @cal-puddies​ for listening to me whine and obsess over every detail and for (virtually) slapping me upside the head every time I said I was going to just scrap it (and there were many times, trust.)

Note this is a sequel but I think there’s enough context within this piece that you’d be able to enjoy as a standalone if you haven’t read or forgot what happened during In My Dreams...

Warnings: Sexual tension, frustration and resolution. I couldn’t figure out how to do specific warnings without also spoiling the narrative (yes, really) so this is kind of a blanket fluffy smut warning. The sex is explicit in detail but not extreme in nature. ‘Tis a soft, dirty story you’re about to read. Also yes, Ash wears the mountain pants again and no, I will not apologize. 

Word Count: 10,555

Masterlist // Ko-Fi and New 2021 Taglist linked above

Let  me  know  what  you  think!

“I can’t say this is how I imagined getting you out of your clothes for the first time but after months of isolation, I’ll take what I can get,” you quip.

Ashton giggles as he peels off his button down shirt, leaving him in a classic white tank. “I can’t say anything about tonight has gone the way I imagined it would,” he confesses. “I’m sorry things have been kind of a bust.”

You try not to blatantly ogle his muscular build as you playfully jab, “You mean, you didn’t spend all that time longing for us to spend hours waiting outside a restaurant for a socially distant table only to be turned away because now it’s closing time and ending up having to eat drive thru burgers in the backseat of your car?”

“With ketchup dripping all over one of my best shirts? And you saving the day with a suspiciously convenient stain remover pen?” He riffs, passing his top to you.

“Exactly how I pictured it,” you shrug, dabbing at his shirt with the aforementioned magic pen.  “Shame, our fantasies tend to match up a lot better than this.”

You’d never thought much of long distance relationships and you especially never thought you’d find yourself in one with only a few miles separating you but 2020 had been full of surprises; getting to know Ash had turned out to be the silver lining in an otherwise terrible year. 

You’ve each reflected on it plenty and agreed it seems as if your connection was destined to see you both through this strange period. You met at the last party you were invited to before quarantine started, you ran into each other again at the last concert either of you got to attend. Your first date was also your final restaurant meal, the last time you went to a movie was with a group of mutual friends and you sat next to him, giggling like a teenager, intentionally brushing his fingers in the popcorn tub.

When the stay at home order was issued, it didn’t take long for you to check in with each other and while it wasn’t an easy time, you were grateful to build a bond with literally no outside influence. And now after countless texted inside jokes, heart to heart phone calls (and more than a few naughty ones), restrictions had been relaxed and you were finally able to reunite. Only the real world is proving to be a bit more complicated than either of you remember.

“You know, I’m not usually a ‘hop in the backseat on a first date’ kind of gal, but this is pretty fun,” you joke.

Ashton grins. “If it makes you feel any better, I think technically this is maybe our third or fourth date?”

“Anything pre-quarantine doesn’t count,” you shake your head insistently. “That was a lifetime ago, another world. I cook now, I go for walks, I do crosswords now. Whoever you went out with in The Before Times - I don’t know her.”

His loud laugh fills the car and the warmth of it overwhelms you; after months of hearing it through a speaker, you can’t believe you’re finally getting to witness it in person. 

"So if we’re starting over at square one, then what’s the explanation for that kiss you laid on me when I picked you up?” He teases.

“I’m a complex woman, I feel like you should know that by now,” you reply with a coy shrug, handing him his now stain free shirt.

The two of you finish your meals, chatting happily and making non-stop jokes about what a fail your date was. You’re relieved at how natural things are flowing; you knew there was undeniable chemistry but part of you was still nervous about getting used to being around each other - another person, even - again. But beyond the standard date jitters, things were comfortable and familiar.

Your anxiety briefly returns as he pulls the car into your driveway. Of course you want to invite him in, you’ve been waiting so long to invite him in but things just feel… off. You turn, ready to offer an apologetic goodnight but before you get a chance, he’s turning to look at you sheepishly.

“I can’t believe I’m saying this but would you mind if we maybe called it a night?” He rushes out, nervously running a hand through his hair. You watch him, fascinated. You’re still not used to how long his hair got in quarantine and you’re definitely not used to seeing him bashful. “I know we joked about it and I appreciate you being cool about everything but I really did want to give you the night out you deserve… and that just didn’t happen. I’d like to try again.”

Your heart swells at his sincerity; he’d always been so genuine and open over the phone, but it’s almost overwhelming experiencing it while he’s looking into your eyes. “Have I never told you that ketchup stains are one of my biggest turn ons?” You tease, hoping to ease some of his obvious embarrassment. “Hey, we’ve waited this long, what’s a little bit longer?”

A little bit longer ends up being the following weekend. It turns out, coming up with romantic and yet responsibly distanced date ideas is harder than either of you thought. With you both having the luxury of working from home and generally not having to venture out unless absolutely necessary, you both decide you’re most comfortable with eliminating the public out of the equation as much as you can.

You settle on a short hike followed by a picnic and when you open your front door you realize just how unprepared you are for the concept of Morning Ash. You smile to yourself as you realize that he must have overslept as his face is still adorably puffy from sleeping, hair still wet from the shower. Yesterday’s five o’clock shadow is still present - he must have been running so late he had to forego his morning shave. The thought of waking up next to him looking like this pops into your mind, that soon you could be the reason he’s running late in the morning and your stomach actually drops.

You push your thoughts aside as you move to greet him with a hug; his cologne is prominent and obviously freshly sprayed and you think to yourself that you're excited to smell like him for the rest of the day.

“Got a surprise for you in the car,” he murmurs.

You’re in the middle of wondering how he makes even a simple white t-shirt look devastating when he opens the passenger door for you. Before you even climb in, you’re instantly greeted by the smell of fresh coffee and breakfast burritos and he chuckles at the way your face lights up. 

“Flowers seemed too formal for a morning date, I figured caffeine and grease was just as nice.” 

“I’ve never felt more seen by a partner,” you smile, wrapping your arms around his neck and pulling him in for a sweet, slow kiss. 

You start to pull away to get in the car but Ashton snakes his arms around you and draws you back in for a few more smooches. “Figure we should get as many of these in as we can now, those burritos are no joke,” he laughs.

It’s a bit of a drive to get to a hiking trail that seemed unlikely to be crowded but you don’t mind. After months of waiting to be in this man’s presence, the more time you can spend with him the better. The trip passes quickly, with the two of you basking in each other’s company, play-arguing over playlists and agreeing that “when this is all over” you should plan a road trip together.

“Looks like we’ve got the place to ourselves,” he observes, pulling the car into the empty lot. He’s first out of the car and you hear a distinct “UGH” from him as soon as he steps out. He sees your puzzled look through the windshield as he walks around to your side to open your door. “I didn’t expect it to be so fuckin’ hot,” he explains.

You get out and instantly scrunch up your face as a gust of hot wind breezes over you. “Well, we did travel more inland, I guess it makes sense it’d be a little warmer,” you reason. 

You commiserate about the weather and then Ash starts gathering your things from the trunk of the car, taking non-essentials out of your backpacks since the heat is going to make your hike a lot less leisurely than planned. 

Despite the weather, the first portion of your hike is nice: you stroll and talk, enjoying the scenery and your time together. Ashton brought his camera with him and you catch him sneaking a few photos of you along the trail so you teasingly start snapping an excessive amount of pics of him using your phone.

As you get closer to the area you planned on stopping at for lunch, the heat starts getting more and more intense. The morning clouds have now dissipated and the sun is bright and unrelenting, causing the conversation to drag as you both start breathing a little more labored, focusing on getting to your stopping point as quickly as possible. It takes a lot longer than expected and by the time you reach your picnic spot, you’re both exhausted and covered in sweat.

You spread a blanket on the ground and immediately throw yourself on it, grateful for a chance to rest. You look up and see Ash peeling off his t-shirt and draping it over a rock in hopes it will dry before you have to head back.

Normally you’d be silently reprimanding yourself for staring at his bare flesh on display but truthfully all you’re thinking about is how much skin he’s exposing to the sun. “Think we left the sunscreen in the car,” you declare, sitting up to dig through your stuff. “As much as I’m enjoying the show, you’re gonna get fried if you don’t throw that back on.”

He sprawls out on the blanket next to you. “We’re shaded, it’ll be fine,” he insists, pulling his sweat-soaked hair back with a rubber band from his wrist.

The picnic is pleasant but far from the romantic adventure you’d envisioned. You’d hoped the two of you would be laughing under a tree, eating a delicious meal as an equally delicious breeze grazes your skin. The reality is the two of you sitting in silence because you’re so uncomfortable under the unforgiving sunshine, eating food that you would’ve preserved better had you known about the weather, as a hot wind scorches your skin. The part of you that had fantasized about sneaking in a heated makeout can’t get enough of the irony that this date is definitely heated, just not in the way it should’ve been.

With the peak temperature of the day still to come, you agree to call it and head for the car already; Ash puts his shirt back on and you notice him wincing as he moves his obviously sunburned skin, but you choose to say nothing.

The trek back is quiet, both of you physically drained and a bit mentally defeated at yet another date gone awry. At one point, you stop in a shaded area to catch your breath and you give him a quick kiss. “Had fun,” you say quietly. He offers you a soft smile in return.

The drive home is equally lowkey, the discontent and exhaustion of the day filling where there should be sexual tension. He knows the mood has deflated considerably so he doesn’t even ask you to come back to his, he just drives you home. 

The car pulls into your driveway and you turn to him. “Think we’re cursed or something?” Your voice is joking but he can detect the undertone of worry.

Ash gives you a bright smile that’s instantly a comfort. “Nah… maybe cursed with too much ambition and insufficient planning skills but I have no doubt this is exactly where I’m meant to be.” He reaches for your hand, interlacing your fingers and kissing your knuckles.

He walks you to your door and gives you a long kiss that almost has you reconsidering inviting him in. “We got this,” he whispers. 

You ruffle his hair. “I’ve also got aloe you can borrow for these sunburns, how are you even able to move?” You laugh, unlocking your door.

A few days pass before either of you broach the subject of another date; you’re finally the one to bring it up and you both agree on a simple dinner at home for the next night.

“Third time’s a charm, right?” You joke as he opens the door.

He draws you in for a slow kiss as you step inside. You murmur when you feel his facial hair brush against you; his beard is fuller than when you last saw him and you suspect he may have quit shaving simply based on the reaction you’d had to the look on your date. “Well, we’re already off to a good start, I’d say,” he comments against your lips.

You’ve only ever seen Ashton’s house in the background of your video chats and when he notices you looking around with fascination, he excitedly offers to give you a tour. You swear you can actually hear your heart going pitter patter as he proudly escorts you around, sharing funny memories about his friends involving each room or telling elaborate stories about different trinkets he owns. You can tell he’s missed entertaining people in his home and you’re so happy that you’re able to fill that void for him tonight.

You follow him to the kitchen. “Smells amazing, must be quite the dish,” you tease, knowing full well you sent him the “secret” recipe for your grandma’s spaghetti sauce the night before. He pokes at you and you giggle, “Anything I can do to help?”

“The groceries should be delivered any minute,” he answers, checking his phone. “There’s gloves and sanitizer wipes under the sink if you don’t mind taking care of that when it arrives.”

A few minutes later, you peck his cheek as you pass by to go outside and tend to your assignment. Ash nearly spirals when it’s discovered that the shopper made some substitutions without asking but you reassure him that dinner’s not ruined even if the sauce uses regular sugar instead of brown and will be poured over fettuccine noodles instead of spaghetti. 

“Not to jinx anything but I think this is our best first date yet,” you joke after dinner, getting out two coffee mugs from the cabinet he’d directed you to.

“All we had to do was eliminate the variables: other people, the weather, the outside world in general,” he ticks off the list on his fingers with a smile.

You hit the brew button on the coffeemaker and slide closer to where he stands loading the dishwasher. “Well. Just proves that all we really need is each other,” you muse, with a sweet smile. He grins at you, drying his hands so that he can cradle your face and kiss you. His hands are soft from the soap he just used and you sigh approvingly into his mouth as his thumb draws circles on your cheek.

That flirty but sweet tone continues as you move to the living room; you sit on the couch, drinking your coffee, chatting comfortably. You both keep finding reasons to scoot closer together, a thick layer of tension between you. You’d each talked a big game when sharing fantasies about what your first time might be like but now that it might be here, you’re surprised by the hazy combination of excitement and nerves you feel.

It’s hard to say who makes the first move: there’s a lull in the conversation and then suddenly, a kiss. Ashton’s hands quickly make their way into your hair and before long, things get heated and you find yourself climbing into his lap to straddle him. This was about as far as things had gotten between you pre-quarantine and it’s as glorious as you remember.

You roll your hips above him and he groans into the mark he was leaving on your neck; your shirt rides up with your movements and his fingers softly dance over the exposed skin. As you nibble along his jaw, his hands find their way up the back of your shirt and you shiver at his warmth. You put your hands on his wrists, guiding them up, letting him know it’s OK to take your shirt off; he does and you silently thank your past self for wearing one of your pretty bras tonight. 

“So beautiful, baby,” he breathes and then his mouth is back on yours, hands busy exploring the new skin on display for him. You shift your hips again and this time find yourself the one to groan, feeling him hard beneath you for the first time; you’ve spent a lot of time wondering what this would feel like and it’s more intoxicating than you ever could’ve imagined.

Ash lifts you off his lap and lays you back on the couch, peeling his own shirt off before moving to be on top of you. He kisses you hungrily and then makes his way down your body, the scratch of his beard deliciously teasing you, lips pecking over every inch of your neck before they attach to the tops of your breasts.

You pull him back up to your mouth and slide your hands down to unbuckle his belt. You brush over his length through his jeans and nearly gasp at the contact; you know he’s not even fully hard and he feels huge. This revelation has you getting impatient and you attempt to push his pants down. "Jesus dude, are these painted on or what?" You joke, struggling.

 "Hey, I could ask you the same thing," he retorts, running his hands along your ass to prove his point. With a goofy smile, he asks, "Should we pause and de-pants ourselves?" 

You laugh as you untangle yourself from his body and pull your pants off while he does the same. He eyes your matching lace lingerie and teases, "That’s some mighty fancy underwear you've got on there, Miss ‘Let’s Take The Pressure Off And Not Expect Anything To Happen Tomorrow Night’.”

You feel your cheeks warming at both his gawking attention and his implication you were hoping things would end up this way. You playfully fire back, "Maybe I dress like this all the time, you don't know me… or maybe I wanted to feel sexy for myself tonight." You try to pull him into a kiss but he pulls back, looking at you with a raised eyebrow. "Or maybe I'm really behind on laundry and I only have the nice stuff left," you say with a sheepish giggle. 

“That I believe,” he laughs delightedly. "Whatever the reason, you look fucking incredible.”

You intend to murmur a thanks but the way his kisses are currently being  peppered in between your breasts causes it to come out as a moan instead. His fingers toy with the closure of your bra and he looks at you to softly ask, “May I?”

You nod enthusiastically and close your eyes as his mouth acquaints itself with your bare breasts, your hands tangling in his hair. Your mouths find each other again, tongues familiarizing themselves with every detail of each other. You reach between your bodies and grip the tent in his underwear; you trace the shape of him through the material and he breaks your kiss to let out a strained moan. “God, I can’t wait to make you cum,” you murmur, a bit surprised by your own boldness.

You feel Ash breathe deeply, affected by your words. “Well, I’m afraid I have a strict ‘ladies first’ policy in this house, so I clearly need to get started,” he jokes, attempting to steady himself. “Bedroom?”

He helps you off the couch and you start to reach for your discarded clothes but he pulls you along, shaking his head. “You won’t be needing those for a while,” he grins.

You follow him to his room, impressing yourself with how steady on your feet you are, how calm you feel; your heart is racing but it’s from anticipation instead of uncertainty, which is unusual for you when you’re about to sleep with someone new. You tend to make these decisions impulsively, with a bit of a “fuck now, ask questions later” attitude. The fact that you’ve waited for this long to be with him and that you feel totally at ease, wandering through his upstairs hallway in just your panties, is the latest in a series of signs telling you that your feelings for Ashton are different.

You settle on the bed while he pauses in the doorway, fiddling with the dimmer on the light switch, determined to get it just right. He finally comes over and you don’t waste any time, climbing over to the edge of the bed to pull off his boxers. His cock springs free and you bite your lip, hoping you’re not actually drooling like you fear you might be.

“You good?” He goads you with a smug smile. During a couple of your video romps, you’d gotten yourself off with toys and he teased you about your selections, calling you a size queen. As you find yourself fascinated surveying the notable length and girth in front of you, you have to admit, he’s not wrong.

You silence his remarks by leaning forward and tentatively licking his tip, closing your eyes in satisfaction when you taste a drop of precum. You roll your tongue around the head, tracing every curve and ridge with your tongue. When you get comfortable enough to wrap your lips around him and slowly start taking him into your mouth, he quietly breathes your name, brushing your hair out of your face, and you feel like you could cum right then and there.

He senses your eagerness and lets you work for a bit longer before he gently pulls you off with a heavy sigh. "Ladies first, remember?" He rasps, flashing you a dazzling smile that would've made you weak even if he wasn't naked in front of you.

He gestures for you to lay back as he kneels at the edge of the bed, dragging his beard across your thighs before hooking his thumbs in your panties to slowly pull them off. You close your eyes, a blissful, close-mouthed smile decorating your face. Ash groans, gazing up at you. “Do you have any idea how many times I laid in this bed picturing what it’d be like to have you here like this?” He asks, raising himself up to kiss you passionately. “Better than I ever could’ve imagined.” 

His lips travel back down your body and you’re so caught up in how dreamy it is to finally feel him like this, you don’t notice he’s already made it back down your body and you cry out when his tongue licks a bold stripe up your center. You’re almost certain you feel him smile against you, proud of the reaction he’s achieved. 

You run your hands through his long hair, trying your best not to tug at it too much, although you suspect he might enjoy that. He alternates between soft, fluttering licks at you and long, intentional strokes, using every centimeter of his wide tongue. It’s overwhelming but you breathe deeply, trying to maintain control; it’s when he wraps his lips around your clit and starts sucking that you start writhing, your legs involuntarily closing in around his head and you tap at him to get his attention.

He immediately pulls back. “Too much?” He reassuringly squeezes your ankle, looking at you encouragingly. “Tell me what you need, sweetheart, wanna do what I can to make you feel good.”

You sit up on your arms, lightheaded from both pleasure and his care. “Ash, oh my god, it feels amazing,” you insist, reaching out to brush his hair out of his eyes. “I just… I really wanna cum with you in me... and I can’t always go for two… and it was feeling so good right now…”

Ashton leans up, pausing your nervous rambling with a sweet kiss. “Hey, it’s all good, I’m glad you told me,” he soothes. “Do you want to go ahead or do you need more time? We can do something else to get you ready. Your call.” 

You grin and guide his hand to run along your wet folds. “I think this qualifies as ready, don’t you?” 

“Alright, cheeky girl,” he teases, casually lifting his fingers from your wetness to his mouth, tasting you on them. “Still, there’s lube in the left nightstand if you want to get it out just in case.”

“Gentlemanly offer and a brag at the same time, I’m into it,” you laugh.

He giggles loudly, moving off the bed. “Gotta grab the condoms,” he explains, leaving the room.

You retrieve the bottle of lube like he suggested and tidy the bed up a little bit, adjusting the pillows to make yourself comfortable. He’s gone for what feels like a long time but you chalk it up to your excitement for what’s about to happen. You sit back, surveying the room, making mental notes about different things you want to ask him about later. Finally, you hear him call your name from down the hall and you curiously holler back at him.

He pops his head in the room, looking mildly panicked. “Please tell me you saw a box of condoms in the groceries you put away,” he inquires breathlessly.

Your heart sinks. “Um… no? I didn’t,” you take a steadying breath, bracing yourself for what seems like very bad news. “It was mostly food. And the napkins we used. Toothpaste I put in the bathroom. No condoms.”

Ash inhales sharply, nodding rapidly, which unsettles you; he comes to sit on the edge of the bed and drags his hands over his face and through his hair. “Well. This is just never gonna fucking happen, I guess,” he declares dramatically. You feel weirdly exposed now that the mood has shifted and you reach for a blanket to cover yourself with before you crawl over to him.

You rest your head on his shoulder, letting him know you’re there. He smiles sadly and strokes over your hair. “I’m so sorry, baby. I hadn’t dated in a while and then with lockdown… I didn’t know until yesterday what I had was expired so I tossed them and ordered some today… and they’re just… not here,” he says regretfully.

You chew your lip, evaluating how you should respond; you’re disappointed, obviously - very disappointed - but Ashton is clearly upset with himself and you don’t want to make him feel any worse. “I suppose it’d be irresponsible of me to suggest we ignore this road block by employing the old ‘spray and pray’ method?” You joke… at least you think you’re joking.

He snorts, turning to look at you with a smile on his face, which makes you feel better about things. “I’m sure you’re not serious but no, after all this time, after we finally had the perfect date, no, I’m not going to pull out and ‘spray and pray,’ he chuckles.

You smile back at him. “Well,” you start flirtatiously, “I meant it when I said I couldn’t wait to make you cum.” Your fingers dance along his bare thigh, travelling close to his softened cock. “We can still fool around, if you want.”

He looks at you fondly, squeezing your hand on his leg. “I really don’t know what I did to deserve you.”

“Ash, as sweet as you are, this is an entirely selfish act on my part, I really just want you to moan for me,” you smirk, moving to sit back against the pillows. “Plus this is possibly the most turned on I’ve ever been and if I don’t get off soon, I might actually die.”

Grinning, he crawls up the bed and settles in next to you. “Well. Can’t have that, now can we?” He teases in a low voice, kissing you with an intoxicating restraint. “Got anything particular in mind?” He feels you sigh against him as he gets his mouth on your neck and his hand on your breast.

It takes you a second to find your voice again, still getting used to the novelty of being able to feel his touch. “To be honest, I wouldn’t mind getting my mouth back on you,” you confess with heavy breath. “Or we could just, you know, play with each other.” You slide your hand down to find his cock, lightly rubbing your fingertips up and down his shaft, feeling it start to rise for you again.

Ash groans and throws his arm around your shoulders, turning so that you’re cradled into his side. Your hand lazily drags over his length while he holds you, kissing you with a renewed intensity. The arm around you softly massages your shoulder while his free arm is exploring your body: palming your breasts, twirling your nipples, fingers caressing the rise and fall of your tummy. 

He breaks the kiss as his hand makes its way between your legs, tentatively brushing along your inner thigh, watching you closely as his fingers move to trace your lips and then your folds. He swirls through your wetness and then gently starts rubbing your clit; your hand instantly stills on him and you let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding. 

“This feel alright?” He asks, studying your face. 

You take your free hand and place it on his, encouraging him to apply more pressure. “So good, Ash,” you murmur, raising your mouth to his again, eager to have his affection completely enveloping you.

You resume your motion on his cock, stroking him firmly, listening for the hitches in his breath or gentle grunts to tell you that your instincts of how to please him are correct. You try to recall what you can from the months you spent watching him touch himself online; you vividly remember him twisting over the tip while he used his other hand to cradle his balls. You give it a try and he lets out a loud moan, burying his face in the crook of your neck.

The two of you familiarize yourselves with each other’s bodies, savoring the noises you’re pulling from each other because although it’s not the first time you’ve ever heard them, it’s the first time they’re being caused by you. 

Ashton’s fingers tease along your entrance and you can’t breathe out a “Please” fast enough; he slides two fingers inside and starts thrusting. He starts with a moderate pace but you’re so worked up, you’re bucking against his hand almost immediately, overwhelmed at the thought of some part of him finally inside you.

You try your best to keep jerking him off but it’d be an understatement to say you’ve become distracted as his fingers move in you; you whisper an apology as you let go of him, starting to lose control, digging your nails into his bicep, whining at how you can feel it flex from the way he’s working your body. 

Ash can’t get enough of how receptive you are to him so when you mutter out another “Sorry” upon realizing how red the skin around his snake tattoo is from you holding on to him, he squeezes your shoulder in reassurance. “Listen, you can scratch that thing clean off if it means I’m making you feel that good,” he teases, nipping at your neck. “Are you as close as it sounds like you are?”

You’re sure your cheeks must already be flushed but you still feel them warm up at the implication that he recognizes your noises from quarantine. You nod, chest heaving, trying to catch your breath.

"Do you need something different to help you finish or keep this up?" He asks, understanding in his eyes.

You groan and jump as his fingers hit your spot again. "Um, actually I think I’d like if you went back to just my clit."

He nods, following your instructions. He rubs careful circles, checking your face to see if he’s getting the pressure right. You start to tuck your face into Ashton’s chest to minimize your reactions but he tenderly pulls you back to lay with him, stroking his hand through your hair to soothe you as he feels you start to shake in his arms. “God, you’re so fuckin’ beautiful like this,” he praises, sucking below your ear. “Let me hear you, baby, you always sound so good when you cum for me.”

His raspy affirmations work in perfect tandem with the vigorous movement of his fingers and you begin to unravel. You breathily cry out his name as your back rises off the bed and your hands fly out on either side of you, one gripping the sheets, the other grabbing for his arm again.

Your hips buck, riding the waves of pleasure surging through your body. Ash watches you carefully, continuing to work you until he detects a slight wince of overstimulation and he removes his hand, deciding to kiss you through the rest of your orgasm. 

Your body finally relaxes and while you’re definitely exhausted, you’re also eager to satisfy him in return. While he presses kisses over your face, whispering quiet praises as you settle, your hands move to explore his body again, one caressing at his chest and abs, the other taking hold of his cock, making good use of the precum he released while playing with you, starting to build momentum again.

He groans, closing his eyes, losing himself in your touch. You can't resist shifting slightly to travel down his body, pecking your way down his stomach, nibbling at his hips before moving your lips back to his cock. You suckle at the head and the throaty "Baby" you receive in return is already worth your trouble.

Ashton traces designs on your back while you suck him off; he constantly murmurs encouragement, which you appreciate because your heart is racing, this is the first time tonight you've felt truly nervous. You've always enjoyed giving head but you've fantasized about blowing Ash for so long you were slightly afraid it might not live up to expectations - for the both of you, since you'd shared many fantasies with him.

You try to pace yourself, not wanting to get greedy and take too much at once, using your hand to make up for what your mouth can't handle yet; every time you pull off to catch your breath and check in with him, he sweetly wipes at your mouth with his thumb and it's much cuter than it should be, considering the situation.

You bob along his shaft a few more times, fluttering your tongue along the underside, finding a particular vein you remember him paying special attention to. Your memory serves you correct and he emits a surprised whimper. He squeezes your shoulder a few times and you pull off curiously.

"Want your mouth on mine when I cum," he rasps.

You quickly reclaim your place laying in his arms, kissing him as requested. It’s just a few tugs until his breathing starts to stutter against your lips. "Fuck, yes, cum for me, Ash," you murmur, letting out a little moan yourself when you feel his cock throb in your hold.

Ash huffs out short belabored breaths as he moves his hand down to join yours, showing you how to work through his orgasm, adjusting slightly so that his cum shoots on to his own stomach instead of yours.

You lightly kiss him through it until he pulls your hand off of him, lacing his fingers in yours, squeezing briefly. You lay back in his arms, basking in the intimacy of the moment.

He pecks your forehead before he regrettably pulls away from you to gesture towards the tissue box on the bedside table. “Would you mind?”

You start to reach for it and then pause, deciding you’re comfortable enough to make a request. “Actually… could I…?” You trail off, raising your eyebrows as you steal a glance at his torso.  

Ashton chuckles out a surprised “OK” and then you’re quickly shuffling down his body to get your mouth on his cum covered skin. He breathes in sharply when he feels your warm breath on him and his stomach flutters under your tongue as you clean him up, blissfully humming as you discover his taste.

Your hair falls in your face and he brushes it out of the way, not wanting to miss a second of what you’re doing. When you’re finished, you sit up and daintily wipe your mouth with your fingertips. You catch a glimpse of Ash looking downright dazed, chest still heaving from his orgasm, eyes glazed over from watching you eagerly volunteer to lick up his release.

With the heat of the moment having passed, you start feeling slightly self-conscious about your boldness. “Was that over the top? I feel like that was too much for a first time, oh my god,” you laugh, hands covering your face nervously. “I just… on our calls, every time I would watch you cum, I would just… think about it…” You shake your head, surprised at your own behavior.

He laughs and reaches for you, kissing the top of your head as you lay against him. "Just the right amount of 'too much', trust me." His voice gets deeper as he leans in to whisper, “I’d thought about it too, for the record. As fuckin’ hot as I’d thought it’d be.”

You lay quietly wrapped up in him for a bit longer and when you move to get out of bed, he grabs your hand, squeezing it gently. “D’ya wanna stay tonight?” He asks, hazel eyes swimming with sweetness and sincerity. “I didn’t want to jinx it and get stuff for breakfast but I was thinking we could order in.”

You smile brightly, leaning in to peck his lips. “You can finally make me your famous coffee you’re always bragging about,” you tease.

“It’s disgusting, you’ll love it,” he grins, playfully pinching your ass as you get out of bed.

The next morning you wake up to the feeling of Ash climbing back into bed beside you. You open one eye and look him up and down suspiciously. “Where have you been?” You murmur.

He settles on his side, pulling you closer to him so your faces are inches from each other, at the edge of your respective pillows. “Ordered breakfast already, had to go unlock the front gate,” he explains, voice still thick with sleep. He strokes your hair and smiles at how you close your eyes, melting into his touch. “Sleep OK, baby?”

You feel your lips curl into a dreamy smile; you already knew you loved hearing him call you that but hearing it in his deep morning voice is fucking transcendent. “To be honest, it’s been so long since I slept next to someone, I wasn’t sure how it was gonna go at first,” you laugh, scooting closer. “You’re warm, though, which was nice.” 

“Well at least I have that going for me,” he jokes with a mock pout, which you promptly move in to kiss right off his face. You enjoy a sleepy, slow makeout for a few minutes and then he pulls away. 

He takes a deep breath before quietly saying, “Hey… I wanted to apologize for how I acted last night with the whole condom thing. I just got so frustrated because it seemed like we’d finally gotten it right… but that kind of negativity has no place in our relationship. Especially in a situation like that where you were feeling disappointed and vulnerable as well. So I’m sorry.”

“Ash,” you whisper softly. You take in the sight of him: long, dark curls darting out every which way from sleeping, scruffy beard you’re still certain he grew just for you, lips swollen from your kisses. His eyes are gorgeous as always but you can see the concern and remorse behind them and you feel like you can’t put him at ease soon enough. “You don’t have to apologize, it was disappointing and you don’t have to be Mr. Positivity 24/7 if you don’t feel like it. Not for me. I’d rather know how you’re really feeling.” 

“I guess I thought this would be easier. We’ve had so long to think about being together and to plan for it and it’s just been a constant let down,” he admits.

You chew your lip. “Well, listen. Last night still worked out? We still got to be intimate, I still got to experience waking up next to you. Sort of,” you tease. He cracks a smile and you couldn’t be more thankful. “But what you just said, maybe that’s part of the problem. Maybe because we had so much time to think about this, maybe we’ve built it up too much in our minds and we’re just setting ourselves up to be disappointed.”

He nods, mulling over your words. “Like the fantasy was important during lockdown but now it’s tripping us up. If we were in more normal circumstances, we would’ve just slept together without much thought.”

“You really think your game’s that good?” You joke and he pinches you in response. “You’re right, though, I haven’t thought this much about a first time since I was a virgin.”

“So we need to find a middle ground between this idealization we’ve invented and doing it just to get it over with,” he suggests.

“Exactly,” you peck his lips in encouragement. “At the end of the day, it’s just sex. I’ve been looking forward to being with you, not to some super romantic, candlelit lovemaking experience at the end of a dream date.” “Whenever it happens, it’ll be perfect because we’re perfect,” he smiles.

The two of you carry that mentality with you throughout the next couple weeks. You hang out, go on a couple dates and even end up having a spontaneous video sex session like old times. You still burn with desire nearly every time he’s near you but removing that looming pressure to set the mood really does help put you at ease with each other. You feel more connected than ever, like you’re able to focus on him now instead of the experience.

“The drive-ins are opened back up now,” Ashton mentions during your afternoon call. “Think you might wanna catch a movie tonight?”

“God, remember movies? That could be fun,” you agree.

“A buddy of mine went last weekend, opened up the hatchback, put a bunch of pillows down, made it nice and cozy. Thought I might ask if I could borrow his car… we could have a little picnic back there before the movie,” he proposes.

You smile to yourself, loving how excited he gets planning dates. “Better bring your comfiest hoodie for me to steal, we’re gonna get fuckin’ snuggly.”

Ash loves a good reveal so when he picks you up, he’s sure to walk you around the front of the car so you don’t peek in the back of the mini SUV. You have fun teasing him on the way there, adjusting the mirrors, exaggeratedly acting like you’re glancing over your shoulder; watching his eyes go wide and hearing his stern “Hey!” simply never gets old. 

Amused as he is by your game, Ashton knows how to tease you right back and when you arrive at the drive-in, before he gets out of the car to finish setting up, he offers you a kiss and a quiet warning of “Be good” that basically guarantees you’ll stay in your seat until he says otherwise.

After a few minutes, he finally calls you back there and you’re blown away at the elaborate transformation. He pops the hatchback up to reveal the back rows of seats have all been laid flat and a thin layer of memory foam lays across them, covered by piles and piles of blankets. Pillows of every shape and size adorn the setup, along with a small cooler and a tote of movie snacks. In the center of the makeshift bed is the pizza you picked up for dinner and two champagne flutes filled with your favorite soda.

“Ash,” you coo as you climb into the back of the car. “This is so fucking cute? You said your friend put some pillows down, not made an entire love nest back here.”

“Well, I may have embellished a little,” he chuckles modestly, following you inside. “One of our first hang outs was at a movie, so I thought our grand return should be special.” 

You grin as you serve pizza onto each of your plates. “That feels like that was a thousand years ago but I still remember the chill that ran down my spine every time you leaned over the armrest to whisper some comment about the movie.”

“Yeah? I remember being nervous because I couldn’t tell if you were aroused or annoyed, to be honest,” he laughs. 

“Oh it was definitely both at first. You talked a lot and I didn’t pay LA ticket prices to hear your commentary track,” you giggle, playfully shoving his shoulder as his jaw drops. “But then I decided I really liked how it felt to have you pay attention to me.”

“And of course what I was saying was clever and enlightening and added to your cinematic experience,” he adds on with a smirk.

You give him a tight-lipped smile, raising your eyebrows in exaggeratedly mocking agreement. He flicks your leg in response and you yelp, unable to keep from smiling at him. The two of you continue reminiscing and making easy conversation while you devour your pizza dinner. By the time you’re done, the sun is setting.

You lay back on the pillows you’ve propped up and watch intently as Ash gets rid of the pizza box at a nearby trash can. You’d both agreed that the dress code for tonight was ‘comfort’ and he went with a black t-shirt and an endearingly bizarre pair of lounge pants that feature a mountain landscape illustrated across the legs. Unsurprisingly, the t-shirt hugs his chest and biceps, drawing attention to the tattoos up and down his arms that you haven’t been able to keep your hands off of. What is surprising is how the loose pants still cling to his body in all the right ways - pulling across his thick thighs and ass, making you wonder if he’s keeping things in his pockets or if the bulging in front you’re seeing is all him. You squeeze your legs together, pleased that he’s almost back at the car, eager to feel him, even if it’s just for a snugged up movie date.

He flashes you a dazzling smile as he walks up to the car. “What’s got you all dreamy-eyed?” He teases, settling in next to you. You feel your breath hitch as he comfortably rests his hand on your bare thigh, toying with the hem of your lounge shorts, but he doesn’t seem to notice.

“Just happy to be here,” you shrug, leaning over to peck his bearded cheek.

He hums at your affection, leaning his head on your shoulder as he fiddles with his phone, pulling up a radio app so he can tune to the station that will be broadcasting the audio for your screen. “It’s kind of a deadzone out there, there’s only maybe 5 other cars,” he reports, reaching behind you to make sure the bluetooth speaker he’s connected to is on. “Even with all the distancing, we probably didn’t need to park all the way back here.”

“I like it… Gives the illusion you rented out the place just for me, makes me feel special,” you joke. He giggles and kisses your shoulder.

The first movie of your double feature starts a few minutes later and you couldn’t possibly enjoy it more. The two of you trade jokes and snacks; it’s all just so comfortable and lovely, unfiltered and natural.

During the intermission, you decide to get out and stretch a bit before the second film starts. You notice that when you feel Ashton’s eyes poring over you as you bend and twist, you only feel pride and desire, none of the nervousness or timidity you’d felt a few weeks ago.

Once the movie starts, you sit and try to patiently wait and see if he’s going to make a move but by the time the opening credits are over, you can’t help but advance things yourself. You scoot closer but his eyes remain trained on the screen; you decide to more explicitly ask for his attention by nuzzling your face into his neck, pressing a few light kisses behind his ear, scratching his beard with your nails. “I’m having a good time,” you whisper, feeling him grin under your touch. “This was such a great idea, I’m happy you suggested it.”

He slinks his arm around your waist, pulling you closer. “I’m so glad you like it,” he beams at you. “It’s fun to be out in the world again but also still pretty much alone.”

“Alone enough to do this,” you lilt, leaning in to plant your lips on his. Your kiss is gentle but urgent and he reciprocates your energy, cupping your face with one hand and using the other to press you against him, murmuring when you slide your tongue into his mouth. Just when things start to get heated, one of you pulls back and warmly smiles at the other, as if you’re both excited for more but still wanting to appreciate what’s happening in this moment.

You don’t want to disrupt the makeout but you can’t fight the craving you have to feel more of him; you’re finally able to pull yourself away and you lay down on the bed, patting the spot next to you in what you hope is an alluring manner.

He moves closer and you close your eyes, ready to feel his touch. You’re startled to instead hear a grunt of frustration and the shifting of a leather seat. Your eyes snap open and you see him straining to reach into the front seat, trying to reach the keys in the ignition. You’re half a second away from asking what the hell he’s doing when you hear a distant beep and the hatchback slowly begins to close at the end of the cabin. 

He plops himself on the pillow next to you. “Thought we could use a little more privacy,” he explains, grabbing a handful of your ass and using it to pull you closer. “Just in case someone else out there thinks the movie is as boring as we did.”

You start to giggle at his remark but your laughter is interrupted by his lips returning to yours. You both let your mouths and hands do as they please, exploring and enjoying without hesitation and without expectation. You’ve just peeled off his shirt and are sucking a mark at his collarbone when you feel his hand slip up your shirt to palm your breast. You give a light bite to his skin as his fingers pull at your nipple; he groans as you breathily tell him, “You can do it harder.”

A few dozen kisses later, his hand is sliding down your stomach and past the waistband of your shorts. You pull out of his kiss to whine quietly as his long fingers brush through your wetness, only touching your clit incidentally before adding light pressure. 

“Good?” Ashton checks with a smile as your head lulls back and you grab onto him.

“Oh, you know… ‘s alright I guess,” you joke, your attempt at being casual undermined by the way you’re basically grinding into his hand. You let out a long moan and he quickly brings his mouth back down to yours in an attempt to silence it.

As his fingers and lips drive you wild, you find your own hands reaching for his pants and you sigh into his mouth when you feel his cock hard and ready for you. You run your fingers across the straining fabric, teasing him with one hand while the other works to loosen the drawstring. 

You dip your hand inside and grip his cock, choking back a moan when you feel how much he’s already leaked for you. The slickness helps you easily begin stroking him and you shift so you can study his face, wanting to see evidence of the pleasure you’re giving him. As your thumb swipes over his tip and your fingers firmly squeeze his length, Ash’s eyes flutter shut and he bites his lip, quietly muttering your name under his breath.

His fingers slip inside you and you gasp as pumps them in and out, dragging them against your walls, teasing your spot. It’s an intense moment when your eyes lock as his fingers work inside of you while yours glide up and down his cock, the two of you breathing heavy as you basically fuck each other without fucking.

“Ash…” You start, voice wavering.

“Yeah,” he answers in strained agreement. “Do you want --”

“Yes, yes I do. I brought --”

“So did I.”

You break apart from each other and reach for your belongings, chuckling as he pulls a handful of condoms from his backpack and tosses them onto the bed at the same time you pull some from your purse and add them to the pile.

“Well it’s good to know we’re both the kind of people who can learn from their mistakes,” he laughs, pulling you into a delighted kiss. 

An exciting energy fills the car as you both shift around, getting yourselves situated. Ashton pulls back a layer of blankets from the seats in case you want to cover up and bursts out laughing when he turns around to see you’ve already stripped off your shorts and panties and are sitting there pantsless and unbothered.

“We’re parked in the back, there’s barely anyone here and the windows are fogged up,” you shrug, grinning.

You find yourself captivated as you watch him kick his pants off and get up on his knees, wrapping a hand around his cock, pumping it a few times before rolling a condom on. This is really happening. Finally, really happening.

“C’mere,” he breathes, reaching for you. You crawl to him and he cradles your face, kissing you softly. You nibble at his lip as you pull away and the two of you can’t stop smiling.

You climb into his lap, sitting on his legs, staring into his eyes. “Ready?” He asks you, sweetly rubbing your thighs. 

You nod eagerly and lift yourself up to hover over his cock. He slicks the tip through your folds, stopping to tease over your clit a few times and then he’s watching your face as he presses against your entrance. 

Your mouth drops open as you start to take him. He's so thick the stretch is instant, breathtaking and everything you've been dreaming of. His fingers gingerly brush over your hip, encouraging you as you ease him further inside you, rocking up and down until you're impossibly full.

Ash wraps his arms around you, kissing you deeply, hands in your hair then running down your back, then squeezing your ass. You feel completely surrounded by him and it’s overwhelming in the best way. You break the kiss to quickly peel your t-shirt off and then you’re reattaching your lips to his, pressing your chest against his, needing to feel as much of his skin on yours as you possibly can.

“Yes, baby, fuck” he murmurs as you slowly begin to move on his cock. “Feel so fuckin’ perfect… better than I’ve been imagining.”

You respond with a series of whimpers, so caught up in the feeling of finally having him in you. You move cautiously, almost torturously slow until you adjust to his size and then you pick up the pace, his hands firmly gripping your ass, helping you along.

You don’t even have the end goal of an orgasm in mind, you just can’t get enough of the new sensations his cock is making you feel. You shift from rocking to bouncing on him, moaning loudly each time his length hits a new place inside you.

“Ash… your cock feels so fucking good,” you pant, riding him with increasing speed, losing yourself in it. “Can’t believe you’re finally filling me up, baby… fuck.”

Your movements are bordering on frantic when you feel Ashton lightly squeeze your hips, attempting to still them, gently breathing your name. You slow down and look at him inquisitively. The mixture of amusement, desire and warmth painting his face is enough to make your pounding heart skip a beat.

“Can I?” He softly asks. You nod and he carefully pulls out of you and lays you back against the pillows before settling over you. He pecks over your neck and face as he guides himself back inside you. “Think we owe it to ourselves to slow down and live in this for a while.”

He starts to push up so he can get to work but you stop him, tucking his long hair behind his ear, stroking your hand over his beard. “You’re right, just feels so good,” you grin. “Hard not to get carried away.”

Ashton kisses over your palm and begins leisurely moving his hips. He keeps a moderate pace, steady enough that you’re feeling consistent pleasure, feeling something building in your core, but not so hurried that you’re aching to reach the finish line. You hook your leg around his hip and when he pushes it slightly back towards you, he slides in deeper and his groan blends with yours to form possibly the most gorgeous sound you’ve ever heard.

“Jesus, baby… pussy’s takin’ me so well,” he praises, voice sounding more wrecked than you expected. “Such a pretty, giving pussy, baby… what a good girl.”

You shiver at his words, your hands running up and down his back, feeling his muscles flex as he moves above you; you slide your hands down to grab his ass, pulling him closer, willing him even deeper. Ash reaches between your bodies to find your clit, teasing it with just the right amount of pressure to make you moan. The snap of his hips has become slightly quicker and you can tell by his breathing that he’s getting close.

“Ash… so good, yes,” you mumble, reaching down to direct his hand in the pattern you need. He mimics your movements expertly and you start rocking your hips along with him, feeling the stirrings of your climax. “Fuck, like that… god, please.”

“Yeah?” He pants, watching your body start to tense. He takes his free hand and reaches for yours, lacing your fingers, squeezing encouragingly. “Been waiting so long to feel you cum around my cock… come on, baby, cum.”

The first pulse of your orgasm hits you so forcefully you’re shocked he doesn’t react to how hard you squeeze his hand. By the time the next one hits, you’re crying out in senseless mutters from how heavenly this moment feels, how his thick cock couldn’t fit more perfectly inside you as you tighten around it. The sensations feel like they might echo forever as you start to come back down, Ash continuing to move gently in you, reassuring you in a soft voice about how incredible you feel around him.

You pull him down to kiss him breathlessly, satisfied from your orgasm but still hungry for his affection, still needing him on you. “Want you to cum for me, babe,” you whisper. “Let me know how much you love being buried in this pussy.”

Your words drive Ashton’s thrusts to become frenzied as he growls your name, followed by a raspy string of curses. He lets out a deep groan as he fills the condom, rocking into you deep and slow as he works through his climax. His head drops to burrow into your neck and you shiver at how his beard prickles your overstimulated skin. You stroke through his curls, lightly damp with sweat, and whisper in his ear, “So good, Ash… so fuckin’ good.”

He plants an exhausted but sweet kiss on you, only breaking it for you both to whine as he pulls out of you; he carefully ties off the condom while you reach for some of the leftover napkins from dinner to clean yourself up. You sort through each other’s clothes, the two of you grinning like fools the entire time you’re getting dressed.

Ash leans back against the pillows and sighs loudly, gesturing for you to come lay with him. You crawl toward him, making a small detour over the front seat to press the release on the hatchback again. You settle against him as the door opens, the cool night air filling the car again, the long forgotten movie still being projected in the distance.

“Worth the wait?” You tease, giving him a toothy smile.

He holds you tight to his chest. “Fuckin’ hell, baby… as much as we built it up, think we still might’ve undersold it. Like. Goddamn.”

You hum in agreement, closing your eyes, enjoying the afterglow. “I’m glad we just kind of let it happen. That’s probably the best first time I’ve ever had. Definitely the most comfortable.”

“Same. Easy but still just… perfect,” he says dreamily.

You play with his fingers, chuckling, “I was so comfortable I almost asked you to cum on me until I remembered we were fucking in your friend’s car.”

“I mean, it was already questionable for us to have gotten fully naked in his car, we might as well have gone all out,” Ashton laughs loudly, squeezing your hand. “I think Cal had a suspicion this might happen, he left breath mints, condoms and Clorox wipes in the glove compartment.” 

You cackle. “No blacklight, though?”

He pinches your leg and leans in to drown your laughter with a kiss. You gaze at him for a beat, marvelling at how normal everything feels for once. You notice he’s looking at you with a familiar fire in his eyes and you swear even though you were naked with him just a few minutes ago, you actually feel butterflies in your stomach.

You raise your eyebrows at him expectantly and Ash smirks. “Was just thinkin’ it’s for the best anyways. The first time I cover you in cum I don’t want it to be in a dark backseat, I want to be able to see it.”

You quietly groan, a naughty glint in your eye to match his. You sit up and plant a heated kiss on him, pulling away to murmur, “Well. It’s still early… my place or yours?”

————-

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[sluttyminghao]

please | k.mg

w.c: 2.2k request: could you possibly do mingyu and edging? genre: smut alllll the way thru my dudes pairing: mingyu x reader (gender neutral) warnings: sub!mingyu, edging, oral (m. receiving), use of toys (vibrator, cock ring), use of handcuffs, slight mention of sexting a/n: this has been the one thing I've been thinking about for days,,, I hope you enjoy!

“Please let me cum, I’ve been so good for you”

His whines and pleas were music to your ears, and the sight was even better. He was currently laying on his back while you straddled his thighs, a vibrator held to his cock and his whimpers getting louder and louder by the second.

How he had gotten into this position you ask? Well, it had started once you got home that afternoon, and you had been waiting for this to happen for a while. Probably for longer than you liked to admit, but now that it had played out so nicely, you knew it was worth the wait.

Your relationship with Mingyu was very dynamic, in the sense that you both enjoyed being the dom and the sub. While Mingyu had said he preferred being the dominant, you knew that if you could coax him enough, he would be able to enjoy being the submissive once in a while.

You had teased him the whole morning before you had to leave for work; leaving soft kisses all down his neck and grinding against his half-hard cock, before getting up and leaving him to deal with a raging boner and load of desire for you.

Before you had even walked out the door you could hear him whimpering for you. You stepped back into the bedroom only to find said man sprawled out on the bed, stripped right down except for his boxers, and one of his hands palming himself through his boxers, a loud moan erupting from him once he saw you standing in the doorway watching him.

“Please...”

You smirk and walk over to him, your mischievous and playful eyes meeting his dark and lustful ones. Slowly placing a hand over the one he was using to palm himself with, he sucked in a breath and waited to see what you would do, albeit impatiently with the way he was squirming around under your touch.

“What do you want baby boy?”

The pet name made him whine as you continued your ministrations on his clothed cock, a small patch of wetness now seeping through from his pre-cum. He continued to whine at the way your hand was moving and how you were now nibbling and lightly sucking on his neck, the feelings sending him into euphoria. 

“Please let me cum”

He watched in horror as you removed your hand and gave his neck one final nip, moving away from him. You smirked at his crestfallen face, knowing that he was definitely falling into a submissive state, just where you wanted him to be.

“No, you can wait until I get home. And if you touch yourself or cum before I get home, you will be punished, okay baby?”

His whine that ended in a groan gave you all the indication you needed that you had done your job, and finally left the house to go to work, shutting the door softly behind you. Now that you were alone with your thoughts, your mind began to spiral with all the things you could do to Mingyu when you got home later that afternoon.

A few hours into your shift at work, you were finally able to sit down and check your phone and catch up on social media things. One thing, or in particular, many messages from one man, caught your attention almost immediately, swiping open the messages to a ton of whines and pleas.

[Gyu <3] 12:34pm: Baby,,, I need you so bad

[Gyu <3] 12:34pm: My cock is so hard right now, it’s so hard not to touch myself 

[Gyu <3] 12:36pm: Please, I need to cum so badly

[Gyu <3] 12:40pm: 1 image attached

You drew in a breath as you clicked on the photo and let it expand to the whole screen, and you felt a pool of arousal form in the pit of your stomach. It was a photo of his cock, standing up and an angry red, the tip starting to turn a shade of dull purple. You could see his slightly defined abs contracting and while you couldn’t see his eyes, you could see he had his bottom lip pulled in under his teeth, obviously trying very hard not to touch himself without your permission.

You quickly started typing out a response to him, knowing that it would drive him absolutely crazy, but would be effective enough until you could get home from work and deal with him yourself.

[You] 1:02pm: Aw does baby boy want to touch himself? Make himself feel good? Why don’t you touch yourself for me then baby, but if you cum you will be punished when I get home. Understood?

His reply was almost immediate, a ‘yes’ and a quick photo he had snapped of him finally wrapping a hand around the base of his cock, pleasure evident across his face. A smirk pulled across your face as you glanced at the time at the top of your phone; only a couple more hours until you could go home and see how fucked out Mingyu really was.

You hadn’t even been able to turn the key in the lock of the door before you could hear his whimpers. Turning the key lightly, you let the door open with a soft thud, before shutting it and toeing off your shoes and peeling your coat off. The whines got louder the closer you got to the bedroom, and you couldn't help but peek in to see how Mingyu was doing, and you felt even more arousal pooling throughout as you watched him.

He was completely bare now, having stripped off his boxers hours ago. His cock was still red and hard, and he was thrusting furiously into his hand, trying so hard to make himself cum. You quietly opened the door to stand close to him, him not having realized you were home as he was too immersed in his pleasure.

You watched him carefully, his face contorting into one of pure pleasure as he had begun the build-up to his orgasm, his chest moving up and down rapidly and his hips bucking into his hand to meet the thrusts. You quirked an eyebrow as he finally came, long white spurts of cum covering his chest and stomach. As his breathing slowed, he opened his eyes and practically screamed when he saw you standing there, a small smirk on your face as you bent down to his level, lips hovering above his.

“What did I tell you before I left for work baby boy? I told you not to cum, and now I have just seen you make a mess all over yourself, care to explain?”

He was whimpering now as you took his still half-hard cock in his hand and begun to pump it again, the overstimulation sending shocks down his spine. He took a few ragged breaths before managing to stutter out a response to you, something along the lines of “I’m sorry,,, couldn't help m’self” while his cheeks became a dark red hue.

“Well I guess I’ll have to punish you now won’t I baby?”

He whined some more, knowing that your punishments were always on the more extreme side, not that he complained. He watched as you opened the drawer in your bedside table, pulling out handcuffs, a cock ring and a vibrator. He gulped at the sight of the vibrator, knowing that if you used it, he would cum immediately.

“Move your hands to the headboard”

He did as you said immediately, hands quickly moving up so that you could cuff his hands to the headboard. Making sure they were secure, you tugged on them lightly before kissing down his neck and onto his chest. His breathing became more rapid as you went further down his body, before stopping right above his aching cock, now leaking precum.

You took his heavy cock in your hand, giving it a few pumps before sliding the cock ring on and making sure it was snug. He moaned out at the feeling; he would never admit it to you, but he really did enjoy being submissive to you. You always gave him the perfect amount of pain and pleasure, as well as the best aftercare.

The dull sound of the vibrator pulled him from his thoughts as he brought his attention back to you, eyes glinting with lust and mischief. You brought the vibrator to his nipples first, eliciting a loud gasp from him as you ran it softly across his chest, playing with the intensities for a bit to watch him squirm.

When you moved the vibrator down towards his thighs, you could see them shake with excitement. An idea had popped into your head, wherein you placed the vibrator on the tip of his cock without warning, pulling a loud moan from his lips.

“I’m gonna cum!”

You immediately pulled the vibrator away, watching as he thrashed on the bed at the loss of an orgasm. You laughed at the sight, his face now a rosy pink colour and his hands pulling strongly on the restraints. He opened his eyes to look at you with his lust-filled eyes, practically black at this point.

“Please let me cum, I’ve been so good for you!!”

You had been edging him for some time now, waiting until you could see his thighs clench or his abs contracting, before pulling away from him and watching him almost cry from how desperate he was for his release. His cock was extremely red now, and the tip a dark purple, streaks of precum leaking down towards the base.

He had tears streaking down his face also, the amount of times he had pleaded and begged to let you cum only to be denied meant that he was extremely sensitive and even the slightest feather touch to his cock would send him into a mad frenzy, chasing his release like a mad man.

“P-please,,n-need to c-cum,,,,”

His voice was strained as he begged once more, the vibrator on the highest setting at the base of his cock while you had wrapped one of his nipples in your mouth, sucking gently. You pulled off with a pop, and looked him right in the eye while moving the vibrator up and down his shaft, his face contorting once more.

“Why should I let you cum baby boy? You didn't listen to me before I left for work, so now you’re paying the price”

He sobbed violently as you held the vibrator to the tip of his cock, watching at how his body shook from the amount of orgasms he had been denied thus far. You finally decided to give in, pulling the cock ring off the base of his shaft and turning off the vibrator.

You took his cock in your hand and pumped quickly, moving your head down and pressing a quick kiss to the tip. You suckled softly on the head, his back arching off the bed almost comically. Watching his actions carefully, you gave him a silent motion to say that he could cum, right as you engulfed his cock and began to suck on his cock like your life depended on it.

As soon as you had motioned that he could cum, he immediately let go, hands pulling roughly on the handcuffs as hot ropes of cum filled your mouth, which never seemed to end. He was seeing stars and blacked out for a few seconds from how intense his orgasm was, and finally relaxed back into the sheets, head spinning.

When he came to a little while later, the handcuffs were gone, and his boxers had been pulled back up. Everything had been cleaned up and he thought that perhaps it had just been a figment of his imagination, until you walked back in with a bottle of water and some fruit on a plate.

You handed him the plate and the water which he accepted gratefully, before you sat next to him, hands fiddling with the hem of your shirt. He watched you as he munched on a strawberry, eyes back to their playful nature. 

“Thank you”

You immediately looked up in surprise, looking at Mingyu who had a grin on his face. You gave him a quizzical look, before he continued on, eating another strawberry and having a sip of water before continuing.

“I deserved that, I really didn't mean to cum before you got home i promise,,, thank you for punishing me”

A blush had crept up your cheeks, not even able to look the man in the eye before he pulled your chin up with a finger, making you look him in the eye. He smiled at you, canines showing prominently, before leaning in and giving you a kiss that was so full of love and passion it made your heart flutter. Just when you had laid down together and snuggled in, Mingyu turned to you once more, a giggle erupting from his lips.

“By the way, that was the best orgasm of my life”

[ofherlionheart]

📕📗📘📙📖📚

daaamn okay let’s do this!!

in my head there’s a companion piece to like the sun that’s a mai POV that bops back and forth in time to explore her relationships with ty lee and azula and zuko. also largely abt her sense of sexuality and gender, particularly as 1. someone who meets/exceeds basically every fire nation beauty standard and 2. as the spitting image of her mother (who she does not have a gr8 relationship with). mailee endgame of coooourse

like the sun sequel, wherein zuko becomes izumi’s father. how, u ask? he’s doing his blue spirit thing when he shouldn’t be and he comes across a mother and her newborn (i named her izumi, mama says, because i discovered i was carrying her when visiting the spring at the temple); the mother dies, z can’t save her, but he can’t just leave the baby. how hard can it be to take care of a child, anyway? he brings izumi back to the palace and is like, can i get a wet nurse? and everyone LOSES their shit. ‘fire lord zuko how did u end up in possession of a baby?’ ‘she’s mine,’ he says and refuses to elaborate. the staff finds a wet nurse and gossip starts flying around, all omg the fire lord had a secret baby mama somewhere. when sokka first hears abt izumi he freaks the fck out — not b/c he thinks z had an affair (the thought doesn’t even cross his mind), but b/c he’s like 1. this baby is now a part of z’s life, this is immutable fact 2. i am part of z’s life 3. omfg i’m supposed to be part of the baby’s life?? that’s a degree of commitment and faith in the future that I DONT KNOW HOW TO PROCESS. like a nerd sokka doesn’t tell z any of this. shenanigans and misunderstanding as z embraces fatherhood super enthusiastically and sokka’s brain is short-circuiting and constantly being witness to all these dadko moments

percy/annabeth from pjo boarding school summer-before-senior-year-college-tour-roadtrip au!! bounces between the summer and the journey it took for them to become friends and end up on this roadtrip. annabeth POV, the slow realization that there’s something more to life than, like, grades and good colleges and career success. 

daichi/suga canon divergent haikyuu fic: daichi has always inspired suga to work harder; suga has always inspired daichi to be more adventurous. so daichi applies to a few unis in tokyo (gasp! so far from miyagi!) and is super excited to tell suga abt it (ofc suga applied to tokyo unis, he’s pretty smart and has always talked abt leaving miyagi for university) but suga beats him to the punch … he got the same scholarship as shimizu to go to america for college. daichi is proud of him! anyway college college blah blah one night daichi’s grabbing drinks w/ noya and suga’s instagram comes up, daichi says something abt that american boy who keeps showing up in suga’s posts and noya’s like oh yeah his boyfriend. daichi: ????? noya: yah dude didja not know? anyway suga can’t be super open abt it on social media b/c he’ll lose his scholarship if they find out he’s queer. blah blah daichi goes to visit suga in america during a break at school and he meets the boyfriend and realizes his feelings about his best friend have evolved blah blaaaah idk how this one ends lmfao. i mean ik there would be smooching but that’s the extent of the detail i have in my head

sneak preview to a prompt ask game drabble but yet ANOTHER zukka modern au 🤪 this time z and s meet in brazil while they’re both doing research out of the same university. sorry i keep making z and s absolute nerds?? anyway there’s beach volleyball incredible food amazing music. but all international flings between foreigners must end eventually. no plot here rly just vibes

this one is mostly a joke, buuuuuut haikyuu au wherein oikawa fcks up his knee in HS and has the deepest mope about losing volleyball. accidentally gets really into kdramas while serially moping, becomes proficient in korean thru that. one weekend he’s visiting tokyo with hanamaki and matsukawa and when they’re at a mall oikawa’s pounced on by a scout who’s like, hey wanna be an korean idol? oikawa’s like haha maki didn’t i always tell you i was so beautiful and mastukawa’s like he’s fluent in korean and hanamaki’s like he practices cute expressions in the mirror all the time and duets pretty good with his showerhead. scout leaves his business card, oikawa’s like ‘u guys r so mean for making fun of me like that’ and they’re like lmfao as if u could actual become an idol. oikawa: TARGET. LOCKED. he’s remembered how to work his ass off again. anyway fic would start like, 4 years after his group’s debut, they’re on tour in the united states where iwaizumi is oh-so-conveniently doing college. ‘iwa-chan your skin got so much darker!’ ‘you look fckn translucent’ ‘i’ll risk getting a little tan only for you, iwa-chan’

Put “📓” or some other version of a book emoji into my inbox and I’ll explain the plot of a fanfiction that I haven’t written but daydream about.

[yoonia]

❥ Replies for “slow dancing ● chapter vii”

@freyawreya:

Crying its hitting all the feels!! Can't believe JK would do that he just so good 😫 😩 OC better make Joon go thru hell before getting together cuz he needs to feel the pain 😤😤 Cant wait for the next chpt

Forgive me for making you cry. As I have mentioned, Namjoon won’t have it easy lol

@blushingatyou​​:

Ngl I teared up. Truly hurting for jk and oc. At the end of the day jk made the right choice: they are soulmates, literally bound to each other. I know Namjoon and oc still don’t know each other very well so he might be a bit distant just to be kind, but I still don’t know how to feel about the way he interacts with oc. I’m sorta glad he’s giving her space tho. I’ll be tuning in for the next chapter!

This is so true. Both of them barely know each other. They never got the chance to thanks to Namjoon himself tho. We’ll see how things go on the next chapter as they now have the chance to get to know each other a bit better (without JK distracting them lol) 

@yhern05​​:

😭😭😭😭

I’m right here with you 😭😭

@piecesofapril11​​:

Omg I want Jk back. That was too painful. And Namjoon sounds like an insensitive jerk. Like I know they’re soulmates but she really loves JK. Give her some time dude.

Okay I should not say jerk. I take that back. But Namjoon is being possessive.

Yes, that comment from Namjoon was a bit out of place and untimely placed. but he has his reasons for it. we’ll see more into Namjoon and Jungkook’s thoughts on the next one :) 

@sumzysworld​:

I was most terrified of how you'd handle this transition...trust me when it brought tears to my eyes

Is it wrong if I’m enjoying how emotional everyone is getting? lmao I wasn’t sure how this chapter was going to turn out but this was needed, so here we are T^T

@havetaeminforbreakfast​:

The chapter we've all been waiting for 😭😭😭😭 idk if I'm sad or... I'M DEVASTATED

I suppose we all have been waiting for this to happen 😭 I don’t think anyone was truly ready tho

@shaybeans​​:

I don't know who am i rooting for... Being in love is so intense.. it's more powerful than "s.o you're meant to be with".. hopefully, joon will show some good personality traits cuz damn he sounds like a villain, and i seriously don't think OC would be happy with him like this.. sorry i was just speaking my mind.. i really love all your writing.. and i decided to be an active reader and leave a comment hehe.. now I'm going to work heartbroken from this chapter/j

ah I’m so sorry, I hope you were able to focus at work after this one. I guess we haven’t seen what is going on with Namjoon and what he was thinking. I agree that being in love feels more intense and we’ve seen how OC was with JK. We’ll just have to see how OC is going to deal being left with Namjoon now :) 

[orangefoxes]

Hey, so I've been trying to submit a prompt but it won't work so here it goes I know this will be sad but what if Neil gets really sad and depressed (the reason is up for interpretation ex: bullied by jack or is haunted by PTSD) and so he becomes full of self hate and becomes anorexic and cuts himself #andreil (this would mean so much since I've been through similar circumstances and was strong enough to pull through and keep living, this book and your Tumblr have helped me so much)

Hi @soph-ie21 I am so sorry this took a whopping 4 years for me to post. I’m terrible for not checking my inbox as my notifications have been turned off for tumblr since I was like 13. I’m so glad to hear that you recovered from your ED, you must be so strong and I’m so proud of you as I know how difficult that is to do. I’m hoping this is the sort of prompt you were looking for, if you’re even looking after this long, as it’s not very dialogue heavy, but here you go.

TRIGGER WARNING: EATING DISORDER, SELF LOATHING, ANOREXIA.

When in high stress situations, to cope, the brain releases a hormone called cortisol. It’s alright in small doses, helpful even. It triggers your fight or flight response and readies the body to do something, fast. Constant exposure to the hormone however, has some not so good long term effects. Effects that include, but are not limited to: high blood pressure, heart disease, type 2 diabetes, osteoporosis, and, arguably the mildest, weight gain.

Cortisol results in weight gain for two reasons. The first is because it slows your metabolism, and the second is because the drop in blood sugar from constant high blood pressure means that you start craving fatty, sugary foods, which leads to overeating. Neil’s memory is not nearly good enough for him to recall what foods he had craved over the years, but he and his mother shied away from sweets and chocolate for dental reasons, it probably would have been a hardship for many kids growing up but Neil had never much cared for sugar anyway. However, what he and his mother did indulge in is a lot of fatty, fast food. Partly because it was cheap, partly because it was something they could eat while on the move, and partly because no one would look twice at two sketchy people in a Burger King or remember a beaten up old car briefly pausing in a drive thru.

While never giving much thought to how he looked (short of checking for ginger roots and the bruise on his cheek from where his mother had slapped that smile from his face), Neil does remember his weight fluctuating a lot when he was younger. The more stressful the months, the chubbier he got. It was in the quiet periods as he and his mother settled down and didn’t dare to venture into the supermarket too often that he began to lose it again. It was a cycle.

In Millport, Neil was at his lowest weight yet. There was only a solitary McDonald’s in town and Neil wasn’t about to become a regular. He stocked up on tinned food from the supermarket in his first week in town instead and meticulously made his way through them, heating the can up on the hot plate he had bought for four dollars from the thrift store in the high street.

He gained weight again once he started at Palmetto, he gained muscle mass too. This, of course, was thanks to three free meals a day and a new training regime with daily exercise. It was to be expected, but if, perhaps, he gained weight quicker than his teammates and muscle slower, well, he had bigger things to worry about.

Then he knew he was going to live.

Then everything with the Moriyamas was…well, not gone, but resolved.

That’s not to say there was nothing to stress about. There was the influx of reporters wanting to catch the Foxes’ attention to ask about Nathaniel Wesninski. There was Kevin’s impending break down as Riko’s funeral came and went. There was Aaron’s trial. Honestly it probably would have gone as stressful situations for Neil always go - here and gone just as quickly - except it turns out that Nicky cooks when he’s stressed, and Neil, well, he’s a stress eater.

After Aaron is declared innocent, Nicky resumes as normal. Neil…not quite. He’s constantly opening the cupboards to look for something to eat only to close them again when he finds nothing of interest. Without Nicky cooking, there’s nothing he can easily dig into and Neil, while accumulating many skills over the years, had never been a hand in the kitchen. The only things ready-eat that were consistently in the dorm were ramen and ice-cream. Even the thought of ramen makes Neil want to vomit and Neil wasn’t so desperate that he would resort to eating something as sweet as ice cream. Not that Andrew would let him if he did. (Andrew wasn’t a sharer).

He started to feel hungry.

He was always hungry.

The first few days he started to skip meals, he didn’t even notice he was doing it. Surely he didn’t notice he was doing it.

It’s just -

Here’s the thing.

Maybe he stress eats. Maybe his mother did too. They spent long car journeys with a family sized bag of potato chips resting by the gear stick and they spent half the time stuffing handfuls into their mouths and the other half checking the mirrors for cars that stayed behind them a touch to long. So maybe he stress ate, but it was never because of hunger: it was because of craving. It was because it gave him something to do with his hands. It was only when things quietened down, when the weeks turned long with the monotonous almost-existence that took up the majority of Neil’s life growing up (here’s something no one tells you about life on the run, in between the moments of sheer terror, it’s very very very boring), it was only then, that Neil actually began to feel things like hunger.

So when the hunger pangs began to curdle in his stomach, well, he didn’t mind. It meant he was safe enough to feel the hunger.

Maybe for the first couple of days he didn’t notice it. But then he noticed it.

He noticed enough to avoid things like rice and bread. Danger foods that packed on the calories and that made him bite the inside of his cheek until it bled at the mere thought. He noticed enough that he began to watch the others train and saw their muscles flex and couldn’t help but track their muscle growth and measure it up against his own. He always found himself lacking.

That’s when it started to get worse. If Allison spent 20 minutes on the treadmill. Then Neil would do 30. If Kevin did 40 push ups. Then Neil would do 50. If Renee had a salad for lunch, then Neil would just have a fruit pot.

The first time Andrew noticed that he skipped a meal, Neil just blinked. Being who he was, Neil didn’t do stupid things like stumble for lies and this time was no different. When Andrew asked about him not eating Neil just blinked like he hadn’t even noticed until Andrew brought it up.

He blinked and said “oh, you’re right. I got so caught up in watching exy reruns i didn’t even notice”

He said, “thanks, I’ll grab something in a sec”

Andrew breathed a scoffing breath down his nose, rolled his eyes and called him a junkie. He didn’t look at all surprised, as though Neil was only confirming what he had already guessed. Which of course is the trick all good liars employ.

Neil wondered if he would be surprised if he were to find out how impossible it would be for Neil to forget a meal time. He could never forget. All he thought about was food. It was all he thought about.

Food began to feel like it was all he cared about. Cared about more than school. Cared about more than exy. Is it terrible of him that that more than anything else feels like the worst thing?

And then, as things do, it got worse.

It turned into Neil stood in front of the mirror (looking at his body but not his eyes, never his eyes) and pinching the flesh between his fingers. Noticing every part of him that didn’t harden into muscle like the others. Noticing all the scars that had stretched strangely over a waist and thighs that are no longer as small.

He begins to peck at his food. Rip it into tiny pieces. Andrew looks down at his plate and glowers at him. Neil gives him a cheeky grin. He knows what he’s thinking. That this is just another one of those Andrew-mannerisms that Neil is taking on for himself. Like the sarcastic salutes and the blank, waiting stares. It’s so much easier to hide how little you’ve eaten when it’s all in pieces.

He didn’t know how to explain it. He just knows he needs to be thinner. He needs to weigh less. It’s not about looks. It’s never been about looks. He just needs to do this. He needs to be smaller. It will be alright then. Because then…then…

Well it will be alright then.

So here’s the thing about guilt and self loathing: they’re useless emotions. Andrew would be quick to agree. (Though Andrew is a hypocrite and is chock full of the both of them). His mother would agree too. How many times had Neil slipped poison into someone’s drink, stole from someone just as desperate, shot someone who maybe or maybe-not deserved it? And how many times after that did his mother pinch and prod at him and repeat the same mantra of “don’t you dare let guilt slow you down, you slow down and you’re dead”

Well, Mum, he’s slowed down. He slowed down so much that he’s stopped altogether and guess what? He fucking hates himself.

He replays it all in his head like a terrible loop. The boy in Switzerland that he tricked into taking his jacket so His fathers men would go after him instead. The old women he and his mother tricked into housing them and then slipped something in her tea until she slept and never woke up again. The homeless man who had broken into the house they were squatting in that Neil had shot on instinct. Seth.

Seth. Seth. Seth.

He fucking hates himself. Honestly the hunger pains kind of feel like the best thing he’s ever felt after that. The pain, the ache, he deserves it.

Then it gets worse. Then comes the worst part.

Andrew’s meds change again. The others had begun to make him irritable and he always had an energy crash by about 5pm and a terrible headache. The new ones wouldn’t be of much note as they did nothing groundbreakingly different, short of getting rid of the headaches and not sapping so much of his energy.

Except for one key side effect of the meds.

They suppressed Andrew’s appetite.

More and more Andrew is missing meals. He won’t even eat more than a tablespoon of ice cream. Neil watches him and adjusts himself to suit. He doesn’t know why, but he just can’t be eating more than him, he can’t.

The frustration he feels about Andrew’s meds soon turn to resentment. He hates that he has to watch Andrew not eat and not seem affected by it at all. Andrew lessens his exercise under Betsy’s advice and yet nothing changes. His weight stays the same. He probably even loses some thanks to the loss of muscle. Neil watches and Neil hates. He hates that if he skipped out on training he would pack on the pounds, he hates that his stomach hurt and hurts and Andrew doesn’t spare a thought on food at all.

He starts to avoid the roof. He starts to dodge Andrew’s gaze the same way he does his own in the mirror.

The next time they’re alone and Andrew leans in, more hesitant than he’s been in months, Neil jerks back and snaps “No.”

It isn’t even completely because of the resentment. The majority of it is because he feels disgusting and fat and he can’t bare Andrew touching him right now. Can’t bare him looking at him.

Andrew’s face closes off and he slides back to the other side of the couch. He’s searching Neil’s face, trying to find the misstep, trying to find what he did wrong.

Good, let him think he did something wrong.

Now that’s the resentment.

It’s immediately one of the worst things Neil has ever thought. He remembers sitting, trembling, on the roof, Andrew refusing to touch him saying “I wont be like them, I wont let you let me be”

And Neil’s trying to make him think, wants to make him feel -

Jesus Christ. He’s a piece of fucking shit.

He slams his way out of the dorm and runs and runs and runs.

He sleeps in the locker room and slumps out in the morning so he’s first in the main room for the meeting with Wymack. He sits on a chair that’s as far away from every other seat as it can get while still completing the make do semi-circle around where Wymack usually stands. When the others begin to filter in they take in his new seat, but don’t comment when they see his storming expression.

When Andrew sees him he pauses for a beat in the doorway before continuing to his usual seat on the couch. He stares at Neil blankly, but his hands are clenching and unclenching in his lap. Wymack hesitates but doesn’t say anything. The others play at being uninterested and only Aaron openly looks between Neil and Andrew with a steadyingly darkening expression.

Neil slams his locker and gets changed in the cubicles for the first time in months. He’s vicious in practice. Throwing in as many dirty moves as he can. Andrew stands in the goal and does nothing. When it’s only Wymack’s sharp whistle that stops Neil bringing his racket down on Matt’s arm when he attempts to steal the ball, Neil is benched.

He yanks off his helmet and slumps down on the bench and tries to remember how to breathe through rage.

He’s sat, pinching at the skin on his thigh, for ten minutes before Allison joins him. She holds out a breakfast bar and Neil stiffens.

“Eat, it might help you stop being such a raging asshole,” she says.

Neil takes the breakfast bar and when she doesn’t immediately leave he opens it and snaps a bit off with his fingers.

He stares down the rolled oats and nuts and grimaces at the sticky feeling of the syrup that holds them together. He feels sick.

“Are you going to eat?” Allison says.

Neil looks at her and huffs a bitter breath through his nose. A wry smile pulls at the corner of his lips.

He remembers that Allison battled bulimia for years.

You can’t lie to a liar.

She looks at his face. Concern trying to become anger that she’s trying to force to stay concern. She looks at his face and then over at Andrew, who is stood in his goal watching them as Kevin shouts at him to fucking do something already. She looks back at Neil.

“You know, relationships are hard enough without mental health problems in the mix. Seth and I were a terrible combination for many reasons and that was one them. I’m not saying it can’t be done or that it shouldn’t be done, I’m just saying it makes it so much harder. He used to try to make me eat. I hated him for that. Hated that I had to hide my own habits in my own room. One day, after he stopped me from going to purge one too many times we got into an argument. I said some disgusting things to him. The next day he was in the hospital because of an overdose. He had to get his stomach pumped. You know what the worst thing is? I don’t even remember what it is I said. I don’t know if what I did triggered him or if it would have happened anyway, but it couldn’t have helped. You’re always going to trigger each other at one point or another, it’s unavoidable. But if you know that and you don’t do anything to help yourself…well that’s when every shit thing you think about yourself starts to become true. So tell me, are you a piece of shit that’s going to drag everyone down with you, or are you better than that?”

Neil looks down at the breakfast bar. He still can’t make himself eat it.

He swallows harshly against the lump in his throat. He has to swallow two more times until he’s sure he can talk without crying.

“What’s betsy’s number?” He asks.

Allison doesn’t smile, but she nods like he’s done the right thing and pulls out her phone.

SIDE NOTE: I’d like to point out that Neil is very flawed and toxic in his thinking and Allison is harsh in what she says to him just because she’s a harsh person. If you have an eating disorder I know sometimes help and recovery seems like the worst thing in world and something you really don’t want, but please, please seek help. You can do it.