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velvetm00light · 11 months

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Drunken Confessions

gif: pinterest dividers: @benkeibear, @mariariley, @haerinism

Word Count: 2.3k

Pairing: drunk&dom!Spencer Reid x sub!Female Reader

Summary: After a night out at the bar, Spencer drunkenly tells his coworker, Y/n, how he feels about her. She's shown the side of him no one knows as they go to his apartment together and show each other exactly how they feel.

Warnings: Alcohol, PinV, fluff, coworkers, domxsub, smut.

A/N: First attempt at a one-shot. This honestly went in a different direction than I actually planned for and I'm not mad about it. I hope ya'll enjoy. ;)

GLASSES CLINK NOISLY AS the Behavioral Analysis Unit team of the Federal Bureau of Investigation cheers each other over the too small wooden table inside their favored bar for after-work drinks. They had just gotten back from a particularly gruesome case and all agreed to try and let loose for the night. They even managed to get their innocent boy wonder, Dr. Spencer Reid, to tag along.

Music thundered around the bar, y/n's feet feeling the vibrations through the hardwood floor beneath her. It was almost impossible to hear each other over the music, so they all had to result to either yelling or not using their words at all.

JJ basically jumps from her seat and yells across the table, "time to dance!" Y/n, Emily, and Penelope wasted no time rising from their seats and rushing onto the dance floor, the boys decidedly choosing to stay at the table.

Emily has made the point multiple times before that they reason they all choose not to dance is most likely because they're embarrassed of their dancing skills and it might just kill them to make a fool of themselves in front of strangers. Even though Morgan swears he actually dances like a "sex god" per his own words, he is perfectly fine sitting his married ass down and sipping on a nice cocktail.

The girls waste no time getting down to business on the dance floor as the boys at the table talk, well, more like yell, amongst themselves. Despite only having a single drink, in which he is currently still nursing, Spencer finds his eyes gluing themselves to y/n. The way she gracefully moves her body to the rhythm of the music, the flow of her hair behind her, stray pieces already beginning to stick to the nape of her neck and shoulders.

"Earth to Reid."

Spencer's attention snaps away from y/n's mesmerizing moves and stares at Morgan. A heat creeps up his neck and into his cheeks, feeling like a kid caught red-handed.

"Go dance with her. You're oogling her and I won't be surprised if you started to drool had I not said anything." Morgan was reveling in the fact that Spencer finally couldn't deny what the entire team pretty much already knew, a smirk on his face as he tilted his head in y/n's direction.

"Absolutely not!" Spencer cried, already feeling the second hand embarrassment. His too long limbs cause a great deal of trouble every time he's ever attempted to dance. He can't imagine making that big of a fool of himself in front of the girl he's been developing a crush on ever since she joined the Bureau.

"You've got to take life by the balls, kid. How do you expect her to know you're pretty much in love with her, if you tell her?"

"What? I'm not in love with her," Spencer argues, knowing damn well his actions rat him out as a total liar.

"Fine, have a few more drinks and then let me know how you feel." Morgan gets another round of drinks and pushes two new, full rum and cokes in front of Spencer. "Try not to take an hour to drink these, kid."

Deciding he could actually do with some liquid courage, he downs the first drink. The instant burn of the heavy handed pour sliding down his throat causes a war within his stomach and he instantly regrets it. He's not used to alcohol and alcohol definitely does not tend to agree with him. But hell, who is he kidding? He might be better off getting so drunk he finally tells her how he feels and doesn't remember doing it to save him from the embarrassment likely to follow.

Y/n and the girls are in the middle of a pretty heated dance battle together when Spencer stumbles onto the dance floor.

"Do my eyes deceive me or is wonder boy coming to dance with us?"

The women immediately stop their dancing and turn towards where the man himself is carefully weaving through the crowd towards them. "I thought I might join you guys,"

"Please do!" Y/n shouts over the music. The women instantly resuming their dancing and Spencer immediately feels at ease. He's unsure if it's the multiple rum and cokes he downed just a few minutes ago or if it's because the women begin dancing like lunatics without a care in the world. He joins in without hesitation.

They all dance the night away together, y/n and Spencer laughing with each other as they sing and dance together, him spinning her across the dance floor, and on occasion them getting so close he almost took the risk to kiss her.

As the night gets darker, the bar gets emptier, and swear pours down their entire bodies, they finally make their way back to the table.

"You looked great out there, kid." Morgan chuckled, sipping the last of his drink.

"I think this was the best night of my life," Spencer smiled. For a brief moment, y/n and Spencer's gazes caught each other and they shared wide, toothy smiles. The tension between them so palpable you could cut it with a knife. As if realizing it, the rest of the team says their goodnights and leave y/n and Spencer to their own devices at their littered table.

"I'll drive you home," y/n suggests, fishing into her purse for her keys as they make their ways toward the parking lot. "Before you ask, no I'm not drunk. I haven't even been able to touch a drink most of the night because I was obviously too busy getting down and dirty."

Spencer smiled down at her, "Thank you, I would appreciate that very much."

They climb into her car together, and Spencer instantly heats up at the proximity and the fact that they're alone. As she starts up her car and focuses on pulling out of the bar parking lot without hitting drunk pedestrians, Spencer is compelled by the very essence of her. His eyes greedily roam over her from her lush, lip glossed lips to her sweat slick hair sticking to her neck, to her perfectly formed nose. He drinks in each and every one of her features, truly unable to find a single flaw on her.

The short, red dress she's dressed in hugs her curves perfectly, her long legs teasing him as they move back and forth from gas pedal to brake and back again. Desire courses through his blood and feels as if it might boil him from the inside out if he doesn't act upon it.

"You know what's crazy?"

"What, Spence?"

"I've had a crush on your for years and I've been way too scared to tell you." He bursts into a laugh and y/n's breath catches in her throat. She doesn't even consider allowing herself to believe he's telling the truth, because out of all people, why her?

"You're drunk, Spence."

"You know what they say, drunk words are sober thoughts."

Her whole body tingles as her grip tightens on the steering wheel. Her core feels molten at the desire pooling at the bottom of her stomach as it has been all night. Even when he was dancing like an absolute goof, he was still the hottest man she's ever seen in her life. The entire night, all she could do was wish the moment would last forever, Spencer spinning her across the dance floor, their faces being inches away from each other. She almost gave in and kissed him every single time she could feel his panting breath on her face.

"I mean it, you know. Ever since you joined the Bureau, I've just had this...pull to you. You're seriously the most mesmerizing, brilliant, generous, exquisite woman I've ever met in my life. I ache to be near you every single time you leave. I ache to kiss those beautiful lips every single time you talk, or when you bite your bottom lip when you're nervous, or when we'll sometimes accidentally get so close to each other it almost just makes sense to grab you by the chin and kiss you."

Y/n is dazed after his revelation. Her heart begins to beat so rapidly in her chest she swears it might just burst through her ribs and out of her body completely. "I-Are you sure you're not just drunk, Spence?"

"Oh, I'm drunk. But I'm just saying the things sober me would have never said in a million years," he smiles at her. She catches his gaze for a moment, wide-eyed and absolutely dumbfounded, before quickly returning her gaze to the road in front of her. "I was always afraid you would never feel the same, and I guess the suffering of never telling you how I felt was a better option than telling you how I felt, you not feeling the same, and then our entire friendship is ruined. I don't think I could bear losing you."

"Spence.." Y/n chokes out. "Let's talk about this inside."

She swiftly pulls into a parking spot outside Spencer's apartment and they both rush inside. As y/n shuts the door softly behind her, she whirls around and almost slams into Spencer.

Before she can do anything, she's backed up against his apartment door, his hands above each side of her head, trapping her. "This doesn't make you uncomfortable, does it?" He asks softly.

"No," y/n manages to breathe out.

"Good, then hopefully this doesn't either."

Before she can ask what he means, he greedily crashes his lips into hers. A small moan escapes her lips as he takes her bottom lip between his teeth and tugs roughly. The opening of her lips gives Spencer the chance he was hoping for and she readily accepts his tongue as hers dances along. The kiss between them is greedy and hungry, the built up tension between them finally snapping.

She's pushed completely into the wall by Spencer's towering body. He bends down slightly, reaching for the back of her legs. He pulls her off the floor, and wraps her legs around his waist without breaking the ensuing passionate kiss.

She feels his body move beneath her as he grinds up into her. A whimper escapes from her and passes into Spencer's mouth which only causes him to grind against her center again, his arousal evident.

She removes her arms from around his neck and fumbles for his belt. She swiftly unbuckles him and pulls out his hardening length. She slides her hands slowly up and down, teasing small moans from his lips.

Before she can even react, he's pushed the hem of her dress up to her waist. He finally breaks the kiss and says, "How wet do you think you'll be for me?"

"Why don't you check for yourself," she purrs, attacking his lips, their tongues once again battling for dominance.

He groans at the pleasure and the desire in her reply, wasting no time pulling her panties to the side and sliding a finger between her lips. "God, you're so wet for me," he breathes in her mouth before tugging on her bottom lip once again.

He removes her hands from him and slams her hands above her head, his hands on her wrists to keep her from budging. "Are you going to take it like a good girl?" He murmurs.

"Yes," y/n manages to get out.

"Yes, sir," he scolds.

"Yes, sir."

"Good girl."

Without another word, he lines up underneath her and gently pushes into her core. He can feel her throbbing against him as he eases into his movements. "Oh my god," she whimpers. Spencer releases her swollen lips and trails kisses down her jaw and neck as he thrusts hungrily into her, his hands solid against her wrists.

He releases one hand from her wrist and commands, "Do not lower your arm."

"Yes, sir."

He lowers the neckline of her dress, exposing her breasts taut from the desire coursing through her. He sucks on the skin of her breasts, leaving his marks along her chest. He takes her nipple into his mouth, using his tongue and teeth to play with it, perfectly mixing the right amount of pain with her pleasure.

He pounds into her harder as he works her nipples. Her rising climax becoming almost unbearable.

"Don't cum unless I give you permission."

"But-"

"You heard me."

"Yes, sir."

Y/n's body moves in tandem with his as if their bodies unconsciously know this dance together between their sweating bodies. His thrusting doesn't cease or stutter, the euphoric feeling of him perfectly hitting her aching spot sends her eyes rolling.

"Please," she chokes out. Her head pushed back against the door, her back arched off the door as if instinctively reaching out for Spencer's body. Spencer releases the nipple in his mouth and returns his ravenous gaze to hers.

"Come for me, baby."

Their lips join together again as he pumps harder, the both of them chasing their releases. She can't help but cry out at the ecstasy that overtakes her as she falls over the edge, Spencer following with his own.

Y/n's entire body trembles against the door, both of their breaths heavy and mixing with each others.

He lets her down gently from the door. "How about we take a bath and wash up," he suggests, need written all over his face. Y/n nods, her legs threatening to give out beneath her.

Spencer helps her into the bathroom, smiling at himself for being the reason she can barely walk. He wastes no time getting a bath started and they lower themselves into the tub without waiting for it to completely fill up.

She moans as the hot water soothes her muscles.

"Relax all you want right now because I'm not done with you yet."

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skaruresonic · 11 months

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The common rebuttal to "this reads like fanfic (derogatory)" is "read better fanfic," which is true in certain cases, but on the other hand, there is some grain of truth to the idea that you can tell when someone's primary mode of literary analysis is fanfic instead of... well... literally anything else. It's okay to like or even prefer fanfic, but if you want to take your craft seriously you also need to read books, dude. Published books will teach you a lot of stuff fanfic doesn't, like proper dialogue formatting and how to introduce your reader to unfamiliar characters. Even the crappiest book (well, if it's not After or 50 Shades, which started off as fanfic to begin with lol) will have been subjected to some sort of editing process to ensure at least the appearance of proper grammar. That's not a guarantee with your average fanfic, and hence why you can't always take all your writing cues from fanfic because it's "so much better" than commercially published original fiction or whatever. Frankly, fic writers tend to peddle some absolutist and downright bad takes sometimes. "Said is dead" is a terrible rule, though not because said is invisible and a perfectly serviceable tag; that's just part of it. Dialogue tags are a garnish, not a main dish that can be swapped out for more ostentatious words. If your characters murmur and mutter instead of simply saying stuff, your readers are going to wonder why nobody speaks up. "'I'm explaining some very plot-important shit right now lol,' she elaborated," likewise, is a form of telling. Instead of letting the reader extrapolate that "she elaborated" via the contents of the dialogue itself, you're telling them what to think about it. And that's why it's distracting: your authorial hand is showing. Writing is an act of camouflage. You, as the writer, need to make your presence as invisible as possible so as to not intrude on the reader's suspension of disbelief. That's the driving reason behind "show, don't tell." And overall, everyone could stand to cut down on the frequency of their dialogue tags anyway. Not every exchange needs "he said" or "she whispered" attached as long as you establish who is doing the talking before the exchange. Some people will complain of confusion if you go on for too long without a dialogue tag, and that definitely is a risk, but at some point you also need to resist the temptation of holding the reader's hand. If they can't follow a conversation between two people, chances are they weren't meeting you halfway and paying that much attention in the first place. In fact, you don't even necessarily need action beats in between every piece of dialogue, as Tumblr writing advice posts will often suggest as a fix. Pruning things often cleans them up just fine.

Another fanfic-influenced trend in writing is, I guess, beige prose? A heavy focus on internal narration with lots of telling. It's not a style I can concretely describe, but every time I click on a non-mutual's writing, I feel like it always has, like. This "samey" voice to it. There's no real attempt to experiment and use unique or provocative language, or even imagery half the time. It's almost a dry recital of narration that doesn't leave much room for subtext. I see this style most often in fanfic where you can meander and wax poetic about how the characters feel without ever really getting around to the plot. And it's like. DO something.

Other tells that the author is taking their cues from fanfic mores rather than books: >>too much minute description of eyes, especially their color and their movement >>doesn't leave much room for subtext (has a character speak their every thought aloud instead of letting the reader infer what they're thinking via action or implication) >>too much stage action ("X looked at Y. Y moved to push their seat in. X took a deep breath and stepped toward Y with a determined look on his face. 'We need to talk,' he said.") >>tells instead of shows, even when the example is about showing instead of telling ("he clenched his teeth in agony" instead of just "he clenched his teeth") >>has improper dialogue tag formatting, especially with putting full stops where there should be commas ("'Lol and lmao.' she said" instead of "'Lol and lmao,' she said." This one drives me up a wall) >>uses too many dialogue tags >>"em dashes, semi-colons and commas, my beloved" - I get the appeal but full stops are your friends. Too much alternate punctuation makes your writing seem stilted and choppy. >>"he's all tousled brown hair and hard muscle" and "she's all smiles and long legs." This turn of phrase is so cliche, it drives me up a wall. Find less trite ways of describing your characters pls. >>"X released a breath he didn't know he'd been holding" >>every fucking Hot Guy ever is described as lean and sinewy >>sobbing. why is everyone sobbing. some restraint, pls >>Tumblr in general tends to think a truism counts as good writing if you make the most melodramatic statement possible (bonus: if it's written in a faux-archaic way), garnish it with a hint of egotism, and toss in allusions to the Christian God, afterlife, or death. ("I will stare God in the face and walk backwards into hell," "What is a god to a nonbeliever?") It's indicative of emotional immaturity imo, that every emotional truth need be expressed That Intensely in order to resonate with people. >>pushes the "Oh." moment as the pinnacle of Romantic Epiphany >>Therapy Speak dialogue. why is this emotionally constipated forty-something man who drinks himself stupid every morning to escape gruesome war memories speaking about his trauma like a clinical psychologist >>"this well-established kuudere should Show More Emoshun. I want him to break down crying on his love interest's shoulder from all his repressed trauma" - I am begging u. stop >>"why don't the characters just talk to each other?" "why can't we have healthy relationships?" I don't know, maybe because fiction is not supposed to be a model for reality and perfect communication makes for boring drama?

>>improperly using actions as dialogue tags ("'Looks like we're going hunting,' he grinned") >>why is everyone muttering and murmuring. speak up >>too many adverbs, especially "weakly" and "shakily." use stronger verbs. ("trembled" instead of "shook weakly") >>too many epithets ("the younger man" or "the brunette detective") >>too many filter words ("he felt," "she thought," "I remembered")

>>no, Tumblr, first-person POV is not the devil; you're just using way too many filter words (see above) and not enough sentence variation to make it flow well enough. First-person POV is an actually pretty good POV (not just for unreliable and self-aware narrators) if you know what you're doing and a lot of fun crafting an engaging character voice. Tumblr's hatred of first-person baffles me, and all I can think is you would only hate it if your only frame of reference was, like, My Immortal. Have you tried reading A Book? First-person POV is just another tool in your toolbox, and like all tools, it can be used properly or improperly. But it's not inherently a marker of bad writing. The disdain surrounding it strikes me as about as sensical as making fun of the concept of characters. Oh, your work has characters in it? Ew, I automatically click off a fic if it has characters in it. like what.

#writing #obligatory disclaimer that I am speaking broadly and this is in no way intended to make anyone feel self-conscious

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lucky-clover-gazette · 3 months

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kings rising highlights & annotations

chapter 7

edit: there is much better analysis in this follow-up post, although it does build on the stuff i wrote here

indented text is from the book. some quotes have commentary, some do not. some comments are serious, and some are definitely not. most of them will only make sense to people who have read the series. and, like, there are spoilers. so please read the books first if you're interested!

also: part of the reason i'm doing such a close reading is to study cs pacat's style, especially in terms of how she does romance and erotica. there are "craft notes" that might seem weird, like i'm being redundant or restating something rather than analyzing, but those are more things that i want to remember/take away from the writing!

i'm going to tag these longer posts with "sam reads capri" in case anyone wants to read them all at once.

this is a google doc i wrote with overall content warnings for the captive prince series. it's not perfect, but i do think it's important to include.

There were very few problems, the public killings having been good for the soldiers’ morale.

so where are the people like me in this world who would like pass out witnessing that. just too desensitized to care?

The Veretian herald was named Hendric and he had very strong arms, because banners were heavy.

Damen and Laurent were to ride alongside one another. Neither one of them had the better horse.

THEIR HORSES!! BACK TOGETHER DESPITE ALL ODDS!! because they’re definitely the same ones that fell in love during prince's gambit shut up

Damen was taller, but nothing could be done about that, Hendric had said with an impenetrable expression. Hendric, Damen was learning, had something in common with Laurent, in that it was never a simple matter to tell when he was joking.

give laurent a comedically large hammer and he’ll find a way

‘I hope the injured boy was returned to you safely.’ ‘Thank you, he returned with Paschal,’ said Laurent. For a salve? Damen opened his mouth to say, and didn’t.

throwback <3 but kings can’t have inside jokes :(

In the next moment, the horns rang out, triumphant and lonely at the same time, the pure sound absorbed by the sky and the wide open landscape around them.

“triumphant and lonely” nice detail

He remembered exactly how it had looked, and that was why he didn’t recognise it at first: the forest of broken spears was gone, and there were no gouged ruts in the earth, no men face down in the churned mud. Marlas was now a tumble of grass and wildflowers in the blowy, sweet summer weather, shifting back and forth in the gentle air. Here and there an insect droned, a drowsy sound. A dragonfly dipped and darted.

i like this :) we don’t get a lot of love for nature in this series, so i’ll take what i get. especially nice when nature represents healing and the passage of time.

Lining the hall were two dozen slaves.

oh this is going to be a headache. but it’s a headache worth having, because i’ve approached these annotations so far with integrity and fairness, and i refuse to treat this subject any differently. i don’t want to just ignore the things that are more difficult or less fun to unpack in order to get to the fun shipping stuff, i want to analyze them to the best of my ability and feel as comfortable as i possibly can moving forward.

so let’s set up some context:

1) damen has come a long way from his stance on slavery in book 1. he is actively refusing to partake in this expected custom, and finds the institution disturbing and triggering. he has developed a new appreciation for sex with truly consenting (not trained) partners, aka laurent, and can’t really go back. still, his reasons for refraining here are almost entirely based on his evolving sense of morality, not really relating to his relationship with laurent at all. for more on that moral evolution, see my analysis in chapter 4. further proof of this Really Mattering to damen is the fact that by not taking slaves, he is losing points with his own people. another great hint of his development as a king, making his own authoritative decisions rather than upholding tradition.

2) laurent does not like slavery. he does not think it is morally correct, and has made many jabs at damen throughout the series for disagreeing. he is disturbed by idea of people who have been groomed into relinquishing their own free will. if put in the situation of damen in book 1, laurent would not have been nearly as compliant or allowing—honestly, he probably would have tried to kill his master, and failing that, kill himself.

HOWEVER. vere does not do slavery. slavery had never been a relevant issue to laurent, at least until he was gifted a slave of his own and was made to deal with them in negotiations with patras. slavery is a thing other countries do, to laurent, and his current objective is make nice with a country that keeps slaves. therefore, he knows that his only real option is to keep the appearance of partaking in the custom, even if damen can get away with refusal. and i think we can safely assume that in laurent’s vere, there will be no slavery, even if he’s taking up the appearance of a slave owner now. additionally, i think we can also assume that there will be reform of the country’s pet system, which is an issue much more relevant to laurent’s lived experience.

if the stuff with laurent and slaves here was simply performative and un-indulgent, i wouldn’t need to be writing anything more here. but it is, as it is, one of the few things in the series that makes me feel very conflicted (see also: the garden scene in book 1). because while it’s true that laurent doesn’t actually use isander as a sex slave, and does have this kind of passive disdain for slavery, he does use isander in another way. he uses isander, a non-consenting brainwashed slave, as a way to make damen, who has never actually been a slave, jealous. this is an abuse of power that directly conflicts with laurent’s stated and assumed values regarding free will and individual personhood. we’ve seen things like this before, in arles, but laurent had known that damen was a prince and not a slave the entire time. but isander is a victim of this system—even if isander himself doesn’t know that, laurent damn well does. and laurent historically is someone who advocates for victims. so the fact that his morals here are being set aside in favor of a petty gesture against damen, is… disappointing. everything i said in chapter 3/4 about laurent’s mean girl era still stands: he knows he’s being shitty, and he’s doing it because he doesn’t want to be vulnerable and insecure. better to be a villain than a victim, etc. but laurent being a villain to damen, who laurent knows is perfectly capable of defending himself, is distinctly different from laurent parading out isander the slave just to hurt damen’s feelings.

it’s wrong for the obvious moral reasons, which laurent perfectly understands in the abstract. but it’s not a hill he’s going to die on here, and that’s not just because of the political advantage. this is 100% about personal shit with damen too. and sorry laurent, but slavery does not stop being wrong when it’s useful in creating drama with your ex. in fact, indulging in it for that reason specifically trivializes all of the legitimate problems with the practice. it makes laurent a hypocrite and it crosses a line, in terms of his mean girl schtick. i just want to make that clear—that there is very much a difference between laurent just being kinda cunty to damen in general, and specifically using a slave as tool in that cuntiness.

laurent is, and always has been, a morally complex and often hypocritical character. he has done things that have made me feel uncomfortable to read, like the way he treats damen in the garden scene. and that’s okay, and it doesn’t make him a bad character, or even a bad person. and to be fair, he isn’t doing any practical harm here—if he hadn’t chosen isander to kinda just vaguely flirt with in public and then leave alone in private, someone else probably would have done far worse. and that is an easy cop-out, and it’s not wrong. but still.

the problem isn’t with laurent's actions here, necessarily, but the principle. which is usually what laurent himself cares about the most, as he often values the ends above the means. politics aside, i think that laurent would readily admit post-mean girl era that the ends of making damen jealous did not, and should not, justify the means of using another human being who does not possess free will. maybe he even does that in the text, eventually, and i’ve forgotten.

(also, let’s not forget that isander may have been trained to not have his own feelings, but definitely still has them, because he’s a human being. and it probably makes him feel pretty bad to be chosen and then ignored by laurent. not that it should, because the entire thing is super fucked up, but it’s what he’s been groomed to believe. like, i did just want to throw that in somewhere, even though it’s obviously predicated on brainwashing and a lack of free will. it’s still what he’s feeling, and his feelings matter. just as much as damen’s or laurent’s.)

basically: laurent is failing to be honorable in his usage of isander, even if he’s not using isander as a sex slave as intended. his abstract values about the wrongness of slavery take a back seat to the political and interpersonal advantage of not only passively partaking in the custom, but actively using it to make damen jealous. even if laurent needs to pretend to take a slave to be politically accepted, he does not need to do All That. and honestly, with laurent’s ability to convince and command a crowd, i think we all know deep down that if he didn’t at least want to do this at least a little bit, just to piss damen off, he would find a way out of it. and that is a reality of laurent’s characterization here that i have to deal with, similar to his actions in the garden scene.

and then there’s the other thing that laurent's "performance" with isander has in common with the garden scene:

it’s hot. it’s wrong, and hypocritical, and could have been done in a way that would better suit my personal tastes, but yes, it’s hot. and on top of that, it’s also VERY funny. laurent’s performance, damen’s reactions, and isander’s obliviousness are all very, very funny. and i do want to be able to enjoy them for the petty gestures they are, and joke about them, without constantly having to throw in a “but also this is bad.” so doing this initial disclaimer feels like a happy medium to me, where i’m not ignoring the complexity of the situation entirely, but i’m also conceding that it’s not necessarily meant to be taken seriously, and it’s ultimately written for the reader to enjoy. like, don’t get me wrong, most of the slavery stuff in this series has NOT been written for the reader’s enjoyment—the values here are very clear, especially in damen’s arc—but there are still some indulgent moments. and it is fiction. and these characters aren’t perfect, nor did they create the culture of the kingdoms that they’re about to rule. and they do ultimately change the things that they, and we the reader, know are wrong.

but just like with the garden scene, i can’t quite get myself to write “so it’s totally fine to just have fun with the whole slavery thing” as a conclusion. and honestly, i feel pretty okay about that hesitancy. when i make jokes about this subject in this specific context (laurent and isander), i don’t want it to be forgotten that the subject itself (slavery) is still entirely serious. so instead, i’ll say:

this is fun because manipulative petty lamen mind games are fun. this is hot because manipulative petty lamen mind games are hot. this is somewhat intended as a backhanded insult and display of moral superiority—laurent showing damen how awful he and his culture appear to non-slave owners—but that moral superiority ultimately falls short due to laurent’s hypocritical use of a slave to make damen jealous. all of those separate pieces of analysis are true to the overall experience of reading and interpreting these scenes. it’s a mixed bag, we know it’s a mixed bag, laurent knows it’s a mixed bag, and damen knows it’s a mixed bag. the only relevant person who doesn’t know it’s a mixed bag is isander, because he’s a slave and isn’t allowed to think for himself, and that fucking sucks.

Isander was olive-skinned and lithe as a fawn, with dark hair and eyes: Akielon colouring. He shared that with Nikandros; with Damen.

yeah i’m sure that’s just a coincidence

Male, either in deference to Veretian customs, or to suit Laurent’s assumed preferences.

akielon slave owners, trying to assess laurent’s preferences:

(can you tell my heart still isn’t fully in the humor here…)

Nikandros would never offer royalty anything less than a slave’s First Night.

god, the first night thing is fucked up. in general, i love the lack of like… uh… traditionally conservative (read: christian) attitudes about sex in capri, so the few similarities especially give me the ick. i haven’t read or annotated the erasmus short story yet, but i know it’s going to piss me off too. basically, the closer we get to the handmaid’s tale, the more i want to read complicit characters dying horrifically on the page. nikandros and the other akielons are skirting by for now with the plausible deniability they have re: fully understanding how slaves are trained, but they’re on thin fucking ice.

also, lighter side question, what’s the recommended reading order for the short stories?

sweet grace of a palace slave

gag

‘I like that one,’ said Laurent.

>:(

‘Slaves are trained in the arts of pleasure, but they do not lie with another until their First Night,’ Kolnas said. ‘Here we use the same strict, classical training that is used in the royal palace. Skills are learned through instruction, and practised with indirect methods. The slave remains wholly untouched, kept pure for the first use of the Exalted.’

imagine if real-life cultural customs were built around grooming a certain group of people to be sexually submissive and modest as a thinly-veiled way to control their sexuality and ensure that they are attached to dominant societal figures from a young age without the education or free will to consider themselves actual human beings, so they can unquestioningly spend their entire lives as sex machines and domestic servants defined entirely by their responsibility to the family, and then they die and their headstone identifies them by their status as a possession of their dominant partner. wouldn’t that be fucked up

‘I never did learn how to command a bed slave,’ said Laurent. ‘Teach me.’

guys i wish i could find this hot or funny but now i’m just mad about disturbing stuff in real life that i can’t analyze out of existence. i’m taking a break and eating a chocolate strawberry greek yogurt popsicle and then i’ll try to refocus on the funny toxic gay people

‘They cannot speak Veretian, Your Highness,’ Kolnas explained. ‘In the Akielon language, using the plain form of address is appropriate. To command any act of service is to honour a slave. The more personal the service, the greater the honour.’ ‘Really? Come here,’ said Laurent.

laurent go sit in the corner.

Laurent extended the tip of his boot. ‘Kiss it,’ he said. His eyes were on Damen.

god this is so good. i hate it so much.

to be fair, there is no way to do this that would be more effective than laurent using a slave. because, y’know, damen was his “slave.” it wouldn’t hit the same with some random non-slave guy. laurent wants to fuck with damen’s head, and part of that is making him miss something he most certainly should not be missing. laurent is also fucking with my head, because this gesture is so conflictingly wrong and compelling, a word which in this case means "something i’m embarrassed/ashamed to say that i find hot."

‘Good boy,’ said Laurent, reaching down to pet Isander’s dark curls, while Isander’s eyes closed and he flushed over.

(easy joke to make, but we’re all probably thinking it) damen:

(also, this being the only “good boy” in the entire series is just diabolical. but i get why it is, because i think it might not be the only one—and if it isn’t the only one, that means the regent says it at some point, and that’s exactly why it’s never used in a lamen sex scene.)

Kolnas preened, pleased that his selection was appreciated. Damen could see that the fort’s household around them was also pleased, having gone to great lengths to make Laurent feel welcome. They had considered with intense thoughtfulness Veretian culture and Veretian practices.

i sense some slight snarkiness here—not even from damen, but from the narrative itself. there’s palpable irony in the “great lengths” and “thoughtfulness” of akielions considering veretian culture while presenting laurent with slaves, all while veretian culture doesn’t have slavery.

It was pointless. There were two dozen slaves here, while the number of times Laurent had had sex in his life could probably be counted on one hand. Laurent was just going to be dragging twenty-four young men back to his rooms to sit around doing nothing. They wouldn’t even be able to unlace Veretian clothing.

according to damen:

this is stupid.

laurent is, in all ways but physical, a loser virgin.

he’s going to set out board games for those sex slaves. he’s going to throw them a pizza party. he’s going to answer emails the entire time.

they don’t even know how to unlace laurent’s clothing like i do.

this is stupid.

‘Can he also serve me in the baths?’ said Laurent.

CUNT.

‘And at the feast for the bannermen this evening when they give their pledge, if that pleases you, Your Highness,’ said Kolnas. ‘It pleases me,’ said Laurent.

damen is about to throw up on the floor

Cloth wound around his waist and over his shoulder, the sort of ceremonial Akielon garb that you could unreel from a person by taking hold of one end and pulling while they rotated.

looney toons-ass imagery

He could feel their discomfort, their need to debase themselves; this sort of proximity to royalty permitted only the extreme submissiveness of slaves.

thank you damen for being the only normal person here. you've come a long way.

“discomfort, their need to debase themselves” is something book 1 damen would have found adorable and charming. he definitely wouldn’t have worded it like this, back then.

“this sort of proximity to royalty permitted only the extreme submissiveness of slaves” building on the damen vs. kingship theme, he thinks he can’t have real love or intimacy or vulnerability if he’s a king. he can’t truly be paired with an equal, because he needs to be exalted.

He had sent away the slaves.

damen you’re the only one i’m not at mad at in this chapter. actually i liked the funny banner guy, we’re chill too. and isander is just trying his best

Laurent, he knew, was rooming in the adjoining suite, separated from him by a single wall. Damen was in the King’s chambers, which any lord who built a fort installed, in the hope the King would stop there. But even the former lord of Marlas’s optimism had not stretched to the idea that the heads of two royal families would visit simultaneously. To preserve their arrangements of scrupulous equality, Laurent was in the Queen’s chambers, beyond that wall.

i’m getting so much whiplash from this chapter like yeah this is funny and cute but also is the slavery stuff just normal to people like i’m aware the series started from a specific subculture and kink and body of literary work, so i guess i’m the weird one and the outsider here for being so distracted??

Isander was probably tending him, gamely doing his best with the laces. He would have to unhook the lacings on the back of the neck of Laurent’s riding leathers before drawing them through their eyelets. Or Laurent had taken Isander into the baths, to be undressed by him there. Isander would be flushed with pride at being chosen for the task. Attend me. Damen felt his hands curl into fists.

i don’t think i need to point out in a note, every single time, that damen being jealous of isander is funny and his possessiveness of laurent is hot. but i will still highlight the passages where it happens.

He turned his mind to political matters.

good call buddy, you and i are going to get through this chapter together

Men and women reclined on couches

(said apprehensively, given the overall themes of this chapter) ...women?

Makedon leaned, selecting a slice of peeled orange. Pallas, the handsome officer-champion, reclined with the easy posture that spoke to his aristocratic blood. Straton had hitched his skirts up and drawn his legs onto the couch, crossing them at the ankles. Everyone whom rank or office entitled to be here was assembled, and with every northerner of standing gathered to give their pledge, the hall was packed full. The Veretians present were mostly vertical, standing awkwardly in small groups, one or two perched gingerly on the edge of a seat.

There was no trumpet flourish or herald’s announcement, as there would have been in Vere.

okay i didn’t realize there was a trumpet flourish in vere. that is very funny in retrospect. a trumpet is not the instrument i’d choose to announce laurent’s arrival. in arles especially, i personally think that a halloween sfx cd would have been much more appropriate

Laurent didn’t rise. He wasn’t required to. He just watched from his reclining couch, as the hall prostrated itself. He had cultivated an elegant sprawl, with his arm draped over his couch back, and his leg drawn up, revealing the arc of an exquisitely clad thigh. His fingers dangled. Silk rucked around his knee.

laurent lean #14. kings leaning.

Isander was prostrated, an inch from Laurent’s casually draped fingertips, his lithe body bare. He wore a brief garment like a Vaskian man’s cloth. His collar fit him like a second skin. Laurent sat relaxed, every line of his body arranged tastefully against the couch. Damen made himself stroll forward through the silence. Their twin couches were next to each other. ‘Brother,’ Laurent said, pleasantly.

no comment

The eyes of everyone in the hall were on him. He felt their gazes, their underfed curiosity. He heard the murmurs—it really is him, Damianos, alive and here—accompanied by the brazen looks, looking at him, looking at the gold cuff on his wrist, looking at Laurent in his Veretian clothes like an exotic ornament—so that is the Veretian Prince. And beneath that the speculation that was never spoken aloud.

at least one akielon politics rpf truther is losing their mind rn. we have gaylor, this world has gaymianos

Laurent was scrupulously correct in the face of it, his behaviour immaculate, even his use of the slave was an act of unimpeachable etiquette. In Akielos it pleased the host for a guest to make use of his hospitality. And it pleased the Akielon people for their royal family to take slaves, a sign of virility and power, and a cause of great pride.

narrows my eyes

Barieus stepped forward. ‘I want assurances that Vere does not hold undue influence over Akielos.’ Undue influence. ‘Speak plainly.’ ‘They say the Prince of Vere is your lover.’

found the gaymianos truther

‘Who we take to our bed is not your concern.’

well i mean if you’re using the royal “we” to represent the kingdom, then yeah… it kinda is?

‘Shall I tell them what really happened between us? They want to know,’ Laurent said. Laurent began to unlace the cuff of his sleeve, drawing the ties through the eyelets, then opening the fabric to expose the fine underside of his wrist—and then the unmistakable gold of the slave cuff.

Laurent leaned his wrist elegantly on the curved arm of the couch, the open sleeve reminiscent of a delicate open shirt collar, its laces trailing. ‘Do I have the question clear?’ said Laurent, speaking in Akielon. ‘You are asking if I lay with the man who killed my own brother?’ Laurent wore the slave cuff with utter disregard. He had no owner, the aristocratic arrogance of his posture said that. Laurent had always possessed an essential quality of the untouchable. He cultivated a faultless grace on the reclining couch, his chiselled profile and marble-chip eyes those of a statue. The idea that he would let anyone fuck him was impossible.

and damen is so into it. love love love the contrast with the description of slaves in this chapter. damen doesn’t want them, he wants laurent. he sees laurent as a complete and compelling person. there is honor in laurent’s performative submission—wearing the cuff—because damen respects laurent’s personhood. but he’s no longer able to see the submission of slaves as honorable, because he knows they’re fucking slaves who have been robbed of their personhood entirely.

Barieus said, ‘A man would have to be ice-cold to sleep with his brother’s killer.’ ‘Then you have your answer,’ said Laurent. There was a silence, in which Laurent’s gaze held that of Barieus. ‘Yes, Exalted.’ Barieus bowed his head, and unconsciously used the Akielon Exalted, rather than the Veretian titles Highness or Majesty.

a vine boom echoed through the court

‘Well, Barieus?’ said Damen. Barieus knelt two steps before the dais. ‘I will pledge. I see that the Prince of Vere stands with you. It’s right that we swear to you here, on the site of your greatest victory.’

“he is simply too cunty for us to deny his authority.”

Slaves brought the food. Squires served Damen, since he had made his preferences clear. It was an awkward arrangement that displeased everyone in the hall.

YES DAMEN!

Isander was utterly in love with his master. He strove continuously to do well, selecting each delicacy for Laurent to sample, bringing him only the best, in small, shallow dishes, refreshing the water bowl for Laurent to clean his fingers. He did it all with perfect form, discreetly attentive, and never drawing attention to himself. His eyelashes drew attention to themselves. Damen made himself look elsewhere.

but that’s not real love, and damen knows it. laurent knows it too. and damen did it way better in nesson-elroy

Laurent said, ‘Play The Fall of Inachtos,’ and a murmur of approval passed over the hall. Kolnas, the Keeper of Slaves, congratulated Laurent on his knowledge of Akielon epics. ‘It’s one of your favourites, isn’t it?’ said Laurent, transferring his gaze to Damen.

diabolical. need this energy for the lamen divorce playlists (they each have their own)

He had always liked the depiction of Akielons cutting down their enemies, as Nisos rode out to kill Inachtos, and take his walled city. He didn’t want to hear it now.

yayyy character development

It was Loyse and not Guion that Jord was approaching. She gave him a cursory look. ‘Yes?’ There was an awkward pause. ‘I just wanted to say . . . that I’m sorry for your loss. Your son was a good fighter.’ ‘Thank you, soldier.’ She gave him the token attention a lady might give to any servant, and turned back to her conversation with her husband.

loyse hiiiiiii loyse (said with appropriate sadness for her current state of grief)

Jord gazed at him for a long moment, then indicated Laurent with his chin. ‘I’m glad you two are friends,’ said Jord.

jord always knows exactly when to show up and make ill-timed commentary on damen and laurent's relationship

‘I thought when he found out about you, he’d swear revenge,’ said Jord. ‘He knew all along,’ said Damen. ‘It’s good that you could trust each other,’ said Jord. And then: ‘I think before you came, he didn’t really trust anyone.’ Damen said, ‘He didn’t.’

also isn’t it like SUPER awkward for jord to be around guion and loyse right now

Isander was bringing Laurent a sprig of grapes in a small dish. Laurent said something approving, and gestured for Isander to join him on the reclining couch. Isander glowed, shyly besotted. As Damen watched, Isander picked a single grape from the sprig, and lifted it to Laurent’s lips. Laurent leaned in. He twined a finger around a curl of Isander’s hair and allowed himself to be fed, grape by grape, a prince with a new favourite.

damen is about to start scratching the walls like a cat confronted with a closed door

He lifted the wine blindly. The cup was empty. Straton wasn’t the only Akielon departing with a slave; men and women throughout the hall were availing themselves. The wine, and the slaves enacting the battle were breaking down inhibitions. Akielon voices grew loud, emboldened by wine.

between the heavy drinking and sex practices, the akielon court actually sounds like my living hell. and we haven’t even gotten to the naked sports chapter yet

Laurent leaned in further to murmur something intimately into Isander’s ear, and then, as the recitation reached its climax, the clash of swords like the hammering in his chest, Damen saw Laurent tap Isander’s shoulder, and rise. I’d wager you never thought a prince could be jealous of a slave. At this moment I’d trade places with you in a heartbeat. Torveld’s words. He said, ‘Excuse me.’

The entire court around him rose as he pushed up from his couch-throne.

“couch-throne”

Trying to follow Laurent out, he got tangled in ceremony, the hall a stifling press of bodies and noise, and, as a blond head disappeared towards the doorway, he was stopped by party after party blocking his path.

okay i’m so curious what he’s meaning to do when he catches up to laurent. yell at him? yell at isander? throw up?

He ought to have brought a slave of his own, then the crowd would have melted away, understanding: the King wished privacy.

i am begging the protagonists of this book to stop using human people as objects. again maybe that’s just a me problem, this isn’t my usual genre and the akielon slavery system clearly doesn’t align with my kink sensibilities, but COME ON

The corridor was empty when he strode out into it. His heart was pounding. He turned the first corner into a section of the passage, half expecting to catch Laurent’s retreating figure. Instead, he saw a stark, empty arch with all its Veretian lattice stripped away. Under the arch was Isander, standing with his fawn eyes, looking confused and abandoned. His confusion was such that for a moment he just stared at Damen with wide eyes before he seemed to understand what was happening, and folded to the floor, forehead to the stone. Damen said, ‘Where is he?’ Isander was well trained, even if nothing was happening as he had expected tonight; and even if, rather mortifyingly, he was being asked to report this fact to his King. ‘His Highness of Vere has gone for a ride.’

well at least if “going on a ride” is laurent code for “feeling morally and emotionally troubled,” that’s… less disappointing, i guess.

also, i do realize that this is the place where laurent’s brother was killed, currently taken over by the nation that orchestrated and benefitted from his death. so there’s probably a twisted vindication in learning exactly how fucked up their culture is (asking about the first night, etc), and getting whatever kind of enjoyment out of the whole situation he can (pissing off damen). but there still had to be a crash, and as soon as laurent was excused from his duties he dipped to deal with it alone.

‘At the stables a handler might know his destination. This slave can inquire.’

i caaaaaan’t stand the way they’re denied use of personal pronouns

Closer; the approach was difficult because it was sharp with memory. Here was the place where their left flank had fallen. Here was the place where he had ordered men to attack the lines that would not fall, the starburst banner that did not falter. Here was the place where he had killed the last of the Prince’s Guard, and come face to face with Auguste. He dismounted from his horse, looping its reins over the cracked stone column of an overgrown pillar. The landscape was old, and the pieces of stone were old; and he remembered this place, remembered the torn soil and the desperation of the fight. Clearing a last jut of stone, he saw the curve of a shoulder in the moonlight, the white of a loose shirt, his outer garments stripped, all wrists and exposed throat. Laurent was sitting on a stone outcrop. His jacket was discarded uncharacteristically. He was sitting on it.

this is a beautifully set scene.

A stone slid under his heel. Laurent turned. For a moment, Laurent looked at him wide-eyed, young, and then the look in his eyes changed, as though the universe had fulfilled an ineluctable promise. ‘Oh,’ he said, ‘perfect.’

a moment of surprise and vulnerability, and then practiced cool again. onto Some More Bullshit, i guess

this isn’t the chapter to really tackle this, but i will eventually write a long essay about how laurent goes through his own mini character growth arc, completely off the page, during the lamen divorce era. it’s just that damen has custody of the reader, so we don’t get to see it—only hints, like this moment here. laurent must have had a lot on his mind, too, ever since their last heated conversation. i have some ideas about what that “a lot” might be, but again, i don’t think i’ve gotten quite enough from laurent yet to really start forming a conclusion.

Damen said, ‘I thought you might want—’ ‘Want?’ ‘A friend,’ said Damen. He used Jord’s word. His chest felt tight. ‘If you’d prefer me to leave, I will.’ ‘Why cavil?’ said Laurent. ‘Let’s fuck.’

ON YOUR BROTHER’S FIGURATIVE GRAVE WITH HIS MURDERER????

‘That isn’t what I meant.’ ‘It might not be what you meant, but it’s what you want.’ Laurent said, ‘You want to fuck me.’ Anyone else would have been drunk. Laurent was dangerously sober.

yeah, no, he’s definitely being going through Some Shit on his own. lots of self-loathing, especially due to the fact that he can’t hate damen as much as he knows he should. yearning, more self-loathing because of that yearning. companionship withdrawals, a return to isolation. a revived sense of grief for his brother, and nicaise, and damen (not damianos) and even his relationship with his uncle, who he hadn’t thought would be capable of trying to kill him. hating himself and blaming himself and regretting things he’s done to push people away. just an all-around bad time, but a necessary time of reflection that he needs to experience on his own. damen can’t just swoop in and fix laurent, laurent has to decide that he’s worth saving first. he’s not there yet, clearly, assuming that damen only wants him as a sexual object. whiiiiich was probably why he went so hard on the eroticism with isander easlier, it was an easy victory to get damen hot and bothered. a game he could win, among the many other games he knows he’s losing—especially the ones against himself.

i’ll put together something more coherent before the divorce era ends. tbh, i kinda think this scene should have been a separate chapter, because there is some pretty massive whiplash here. although maybe not, maybe the buildup of emotional and sexual tension was the point. yeah, it was. the slavery stuff just made it more frustrating to read. never mind.

‘You’ve been thinking about it since Ravenel. Since Nesson.’ He knew this mood. He should have expected it. He made himself say the words. ‘I came because I thought you might want to talk.’ ‘Not particularly.’

it almost sounds like laurent played himself, for the millionth time, by getting himself worked up with isander when he just really wanted damen

He said, ‘About your brother.’ ‘I never fucked my brother,’ said Laurent, with a strange edge to the words. ‘That is incest.’ They were standing in the place where his brother had died. With a disorientating sensation Damen realised they weren’t going to talk about that. They were going to talk about this.

"yes, honey..."

‘You’re right,’ said Damen. ‘I’ve been thinking about it since Ravenel. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it.’ ‘Why?’ said Laurent. ‘Was I that good?’ ‘No. You fucked like a virgin,’ said Damen,

deserved

‘half the time. The rest of the time—’ ‘Like I knew what to do?’ ‘Like you knew what you were used to.’ He saw the words impact. Laurent swayed, like he’d been dealt a blow. Laurent said, ‘I’m not certain I can take your particular brand of honesty just at the moment.’

oh well this is particularly horrifying with [redacted] context. also i think the quote “i’m not certain i can take your particular brand of honesty just at the moment” says A LOT about how laurent has always viewed damen, for better or for worse. laurent can count on damen to tell him what he needs to hear, not what he wants to hear. so it makes sense that he’s been avoiding damen lately, because laurent is going through his own crisis of personal reflection

Damen said, ‘I don’t prefer sophistication in bed, if you were wondering.’ ‘That’s right,’ said Laurent. ‘You like it simple.’ All the breath left his throat. He stood, stripped, unready for it. Will you use even that against me? he wanted to say, and didn’t. Laurent’s breathing was shallow too, holding his ground.

is “that” just laurent making fun of the way damen is earnest in bed? seems like an overreaction from damen if that's the case, so it’s probably something else i’m missing. maybe laurent is accusing damen of keeping the secret of his identity, even when they fucked, to make things simpler between them? that would support my previous theory that laurent is convinced that damen wouldn’t want him how he really is, as damen really is, with all the complications between them. or it’s a dig about auguste somehow, and i just can’t figure out how it connects.

‘He died well,’ Damen made himself say. ‘He fought better than any man I’ve known. It was a fair fight, and he felt no pain. The end was quick.’

like i said—what laurent needs to hear, not what he wants to hear. even if damen thinks that it’s going to make laurent hate him more, he still has the integrity to say it.

‘You sent your men out to look for me too?’ said Laurent, his mouth twisting. ‘No,’ said Damen, and pushed Laurent hard out of sight, into the shelter of one of the huge, crumbling blocks of stone. In the next second, the troop was on them, at least two hundred men, so that the air was thick with the passage of horses. Damen pressed Laurent firmly into the rock, and held him in place with his body. The riders didn’t slow, even on this uncertain ground in the dark, and any man in their path would be trampled, tumbled, kicked from hoof to hoof. Discovery was a real threat, the rock cool under his palms, the dark shuddering with the pounding of hooves and heavy lethal horseflesh. He could feel Laurent against him, the barely contained tension, adrenalin mixed with his dislike of the proximity, the urge in him to prise himself out and away, stifled by necessity.

throwback <3 i think this is very intentionally placed in this conversation, as a reminder that they are the same people they were in prince’s gambit

‘I know you’re not cold,’ said Damen. ‘You weren’t cold when you ordered me tied to the post. You weren’t cold when you pushed me down on your bed.’

more true things laurent does not want to hear right now! also i like the use of warmth, as the opposite of cold, to signify both vengeful rage and romantic/sexual passion. two sides of the same coin

‘A fair fight?’ said Laurent, turning back to him. ‘No fight’s ever fair. Someone’s always stronger.’

rewinding to their previous argument. aren’t they both tired? i’m tired.

#this might be the most mixed bag chapter for me so far #curious what other people think #might just be personal taste and an unfamiliarity with reading stories about this kink #or even like historical fiction/fantasy in general that might have systems like this one #if i'm reading about stuff like this it's probably something like the handmaid's tale #or a crime/thriller novel #so #shrugs #sam reads capri #capri #captive prince #laurent of vere #damen of akielos #lamen

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cain-speaks · 3 months

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LMK Season 5 Animation Analysis

basically just me rambling about how i feel about the animation. i'm not going to talk about plot but i tagged spoilers just in case :3

First, to put it bluntly:

No, I do not like the look of season 5. The movement of the characters is regularly stiff and slow, the character proportions are odd, lines are oddly angled instead of smooth (like the monkey tails), you can tell they're still adjusting to how LMK does character lighting, and it's not as flashy and fun in my opinion. I think some of the sound design was a little weird this season, too (in EP3, Wukong busting a giant hole in the wall makes like no noise? Just seems weird to me). The space cracks are oddly... solid, if that makes sense? In season 4 they appeared much more delicate, while in this season they're, in a way, heavy? Also, this is certainly a personal irk, but the blended style for the tears? Not a fan. I could be misremembering, but Flying Bark made them crisp.

Having said that, it's not nearly as bad as I (and others, I imagine) thought it would have looked, judging from the trailer. Part of this is probably because they reused a lot of animation from previous seasons; which, by the way, isn't bad, it saves time and I'm sure it's a lifesaver while they're learning. It's just... obvious. Very obvious, especially because you can tell they did it more this season than Flying Bark did.

I've watched some clips from Carmen Sandiego because I think it's one of Wild Brain's most recent shows, and I think you can see the similarities. I didn't watch a lot, but it seems to me that characters are less expressive with their body language and more stagnant. They also don't seem to be super facially expressive to me, but like I said, I didn't watch a lot. Now, Carmen is a beautifully animated show! But it's different. And different's not bad, it's just... hard. Unsatisfying and disappointing, currently. Flying Bark's style, in my opinion, had the characters constantly moving. Whether it was a tail twitching, a position shift, a little expression in the background, they were moving. And they moved fluently and quickly. It really made the characters feel alive. I THINK it's also a different between puppet animation and frame-by-frame animation but don't quote me on that.

ANYWAY all of that is to say that yes, there are visible differences and they're upsetting. I hold LMK very near and dear to my heart as I'm sure many of us do, so as thrilled as I am to have season 5, it does hurt a bit.

HOWEVER.

Wild Brain isn't responsible for that. Flying Bark had a learning curve just in season 1 vs season 2. We have to give the new studio TIME to grow and adapt to the style. It's really unfortunate because now we have what feels like a very crudely animated season that I just know would have been better with the style we all know and love, but hopefully there will be more seasons, they'll get better, and we'll realize that this is just a blip in our hopefully long lives.

And to the neurodivergents: you are valid, we are valid. God knows I loathe change. I was really hoping the studio change was just a misunderstanding, but unfortunately it's not. LMK's visual aspect is important. If you decide to leave the show behind, that's okay! If you don't, welcome to the ship I'm trying to keep afloat!

Back to everybody now. Your decision is yours; don't let others make you feel bad about leaving or sticking with the show and most DEFINITELY do not lash out at the studio, because istg if the show gets cancelled from backlash I'll jump off a bridge (/dramatic).

Anyway idk if this is really an analysis. But it's something! Less than 4 days for the english dub, whoop whoop!

#cain speaks #lego monkie kid #lego monkie kid season 5 #lego monkie kid spoilers #monkie kid #lmk #lmk season 5 #lmk spoilers #flying bark studios #wild brain studios #me writing as if the masses are gonna read this and not just like 6 ppl LMAO

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nsyncat · 6 months

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OK, so this is my first post EVER since I joined Tumblr like ten years ago. Always been a lurker, enjoying all of the wonderful things here, the gifs, fics, ships, art, all the knowledge and all the amazing heritage posts, but never posting and hardly reblogging, I don't know why, was always afraid I would make a mistake or reblogg incorrectly...

Anyway, the reason this is my first time posting is because THAT amazing moment that happened a week ago, and I've been losing my mind ever since, and unfortunately I have nobody to share this excitement with that will understand... So I had to get it out somehow, and here seems like the perfect place to do so.

I don't know if anybody will read this or pay it any attention, but never mind, I just have TO. GET. IT ALL. OUT!

So I've been a loyal fan of 9-1-1 this past six years, got hooked to these kind of first responders dramas, also Station 19 and then of course Lone Star. I fell in love with the writing, the drama and action, the characters of course, the emotional and moving stories, both of the regular cast and the people in the emergencies (am not afraid to admit that I cried more than a few times, especially when I was pregnant... woooh, that was a tough season for me).

Anyway, like everyone else, got invested in Buck's storyline and of course hopped on the Buddie train in season 2. And obviously there was something between them, and the fandom always clowned themselves that "in the next season SOMETHING is going to happen!" and I always wanted to believe it, and also fooled myself a few times but always was the cold harsh realist and realised it was not going to happen... But enjoyed the ride nonetheless, read amazing fics, saw wonderful fanart, read interesting breakdowns and analysis.

And then 704 happened and I'm not joking or exaggerating, my life changed!

Confirming that Buck is Bi was amazing! I'm ashamed to admit that I really thought it won't happen, EVER! So I still can't believe it actually happened (thank you soooo much ABC!) and like a lot of you, I've been on cloud nine this past week and can't wait for tomorrows episode (also not from the US), literally counting down the hours.

And look, I love Buddie, I really do, but I fell in love with TEVAN (my favourite one yet) 😍 and been OBSESSED with them this past week. Just from those few moments between them and what we barely know that is going to happen the next episode, I truly fell in love with them and really hope they make it as far as they can. I think its an amazing thing for Buck and also CANT. STOP. WATCHING THE KISS! The actors did an incredible job, especially Oliver, also with his spoken support of the storyline and his love for Buck. Such a KING! So this whole thing is huge.

And I have a one-year-old, my life is hectic with taking care of a little human being, a hubby who is also very busy, work, family and a million other things and this past year with a heavy heart I kinda neglected reading fics, and it was my main hobby, my escape, my one and constant thing in my LIFE since I was 12. I do read here and there, but not like I used to, reading hours and hours and into the night, multi chapters and long oneshots, in multiple fandoms, and now whenever I do get to read something once In a blue moon I'm not fully invested or enjoying it because either I'm tired or have something else more important to do. And unfortunately, eventually I noticed that I lost this fire, the passion in me and it left me sad and heartbroken...

And then something incredible happened. Ever since that earth-shattering kiss, the fire and passion came back! Holy shit! I've been reading and ENJOYING fics nonstop this whole week, I can't concentrate on work thinking about everything and reading in-between tasks, I use every single free minute I have to search new fics and scroll through the tags, I go to sleep late because I need to read just one more fic(!!!) even tough I have to wake up very early in the morning and I DON'T EVEN CARE. I'm thinking about it sooo much and imagining new scenarios in my head, and feeling giddy and happy, in a good mood a lot of the time, more optimistic, knowing I have a new and exciting place I can "escape" to, like I had in the past.

Its not that i'm not happy, I have an amazing son and a wonderful husband and I cherish every moment with them, but these are hard and difficult times and life can be hard and stressful and I'm a different kind of happy... So these past few days have been nourishment for my soul and my mood, it sounds so silly but its true! I'm feeling a bit like my old self and it's amazing.

And if someone did read this or did pay attention and got to this point, sorry for the long rant and thank you so much for the patience and understanding 🙏 I love you and wish you a wonderful weekend and happy Buck's-first-date-with-a-man day! 🥰

So I want to thank, from the bottom of my heart, ABC, Oliver, Lou and you crazy lot for resurrecting my old fangirl self 😌 I'm so grateful for all your posts, your takes, your similar enjoyment and of course your amazing fics you're writing and sharing 🩵

#911 abc #buck x tommy #evan buckley #tommy kinard #911 season 7 #personal #oliver stark #lou ferrigno jr #911 #tevan

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hastalavistabyebye · 2 months

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HI!!

First things first, thank you so much for your tags under my art nouveau Fox pieces!! they are so nice and lovely, thank you!

And secondly, if you ever feel like the adrenaline spikes again and you wanna write that "essay" on the symbolism of them, I'd LOVE to read it! *w* 👀 (I'm not sending you this ask as a pressure or obligation or anything - I've promised overzealous things in tags in a sudden spike of enthusiasm after all XD - but just in case, you know... Who doesn't like the idea of that level of flattery? XD)

Seriously though, thank you for the super nice tags! <3

Hi !!!

It took me some time to write but YES ABSOLUTELY OF COURSE I WANT TO WRITE THAT ESSAY *-* The only reason I didn't do it right away was because I didn't want to overstep or something 😅 so here is some more appreciation and love for your art in analysis form, because it's so freaking beautiful *-* and thank you so much for letting me write it <3

If anyone else stumble on this iconography/symbolism analysis, the art in question are those beautiful pieces. I recommend to keep it in easy access while reading because I'm not going to dwelve in heavy descriptions, it's already going to be long as it is xD

First things first : Art nouveau Fox piece #1

Here, Fox is standing in a pose very reminiscent of ancient Greek sculptures such as Lysippos' Farnese Hercules or Praxiteles' Resting Satyr. He's leaning against a pillar with a mild contrapposto (the swaying that is one absolute characteristic of Greco-Roman sculptures). It's a very heroic pose, emphasized by Fox being bare chest, in a echo of the heroic nudity that can be found in the two artwork I mentioned, by the sword he's holding (a weapon associated with heroism in collective imagination) and by the halo around his head.

To that is added his attributes. The sword looks like a parade weapon and not a practical one, it's more of a symbol than a real weapon. The guard looks like a very stylized version of the Senate's (and the Coruscant Guard's) symbol, especially regarding the outline. It also reminds me of the statues leading to the Senate Dome. This can represent the protection of the Republic part of his duty. Fox is the embodiment in the Senate and on Coruscant of the GAR and its soldiers, but he's also the Commander of the Coruscant Guard charged to protect the Capital and the head figures of the Republic (the senators). That sword can be the symbol of that protective and active aspect of Fox's responsibilities. The datapad holds a similar meaning, but for the most bureaucratic part of Fox's duty. On this datapad, Fox plans all those protection details. This is the peaceful tool to keep the Republic safe. It's with that that peace treaties can be written, it's with reports that everything is kept organized. It's the "Paper pushers" part of the Guard duty. Fox's helmet, seeming to frown like that, is his public face. It's the face he shows in the course of his duty, the face the Senate and Coruscant knows of him.

The fact that he's not in full heroic nudity but in half his armor is one more representation of his duty too (thanks to the armor itself). And his too long, overflowing kama looks practically like a cloak, a cape. It's very much unpractical but it is underlining his heroism. And also leading to the procession of shock troopers under him. He is at the center of this parade because he is the head of the Coruscant Guard. This is once again a way to monumentalize him and show Fox through the spectrum of his role of Commander.

And for the last attribute, the halo looks like a sun surrounded by cog-like rays, reminding of the cog of both the Senate and the Republic's symbols. I'm not going to go over the sun's own meaning and symbolic, it's pretty straightforward. Now, this sun/halo is right in front of the Senate Dome, itself surrounded by Coruscant's skyline illuminated in a rising or setting sunlight the same color of the heart of the halo. Sorry for the tortuous sentence. This imagery puts Fox as the shining star of the Senate. He is the armed hand, the eyes (with the cameras of both the datapad and his helmet turned in front of the spectator), the hero of this sun-like Republic. But is it a rising or setting, falling Republic ?

The orange Lilies stands for enthusiasm and energy and are good as congratulations for a new job or promotion. That fits Fox heroical representation and the glory of the Republic he stands for (litteraly here). But they also mean deep hatred and doom. Moreover the black Dahlias mean betrayal, evil and dishonesty and frame the Senate Dome (where the Lilies are around Fox's armoured legs, practically sprouting from his feet and going a little bit down to the shock troopers). The Lilies are symbols of what the Coruscant posting should deserve (congratulations for the honorable position) but what it really means for the clones : doom. The Dahlias are the truth of the Senate but also what's hiding in it, Palpatine/Darth Sidious and his machinations against the entire Republic.

This piece reads as the glorification of the Republic's doom. This is Fox as the Commander of the Coruscant Guard, favorite and most illustrious weapon in the Senators' hands, and most importantly in Palpatine's hands. And it's hiding the Clones and the Republic (and Fox)'s fate behind shining glory.

And now : Art nouveau Fox piece #2

This piece is very interesting in how it oppose the first one. First in the colors that are paler and lighter than for the precedent piece, with its vibrant orange and dark purple. But also in the composition.

Fox this time is sitting. He's looking down, not half-smiling anymore, the gray in his hair is clearly visible (where it wasn't precedently). He might still be bare chest but he isn't heroic at all anymore. His visible skin highlights more his scars than anything, but again, without the heroic quality to them either. The blaster he holds is not an allegory of a weapon this time but his real one. His finger is not on the trigger but the barrel is coat in blood red. His helmet isn't turned towards the spectator either. It's turned towards Fox, the visor looking straight at his face. The helmet is also surrounded by a halo in place of it being around Fox's head. That halo looks like a sun again, but this time a more conventional one. It's also white reminding of a white dwarf, a dead star. Behind Fox's head is a sort of broken glass/non-reflecting mirror and the breaks echos Fox's Lichtenberg figures. Around it are medallions with every canonically named Corry.

The kama is still too long, billowing at his feet and around the words "Code Red" in aurebesh. It looks more troublesome and heavy than illustrious. And the words 'Code Red' in military jargon means "an unauthorized, covert disciplinary action taken by members of a military unit against one of their own".

This piece is not about the glory of the Commander of the Guard's posting and of the Republic. Here Fox is shown tired, lost in his thoughts. He is not shining with his duty, he's not even looking at it. The presumed blood on his blaster associated with the Code Red might means that this is after shooting Fives, especially when the meaning of the flowers surrounding him in a crescent is added. The Poppies are for the dead and the Foxgloves are for deceit. Also note that the Poppies are colored in a gradient following the colors of Fox's kama, greaves and cuisses, and that some of them are not open yet. The three unopen poppies might represent people not dead yet or that more deaths are coming. But the colors can indicate that the dead in question is Fox himself. Especially when linked to the broken mirror and the dead star. Something broke in him that killed his faith in his duty, in the Republic symbolized by his helmet, the face he showed to it. One of the breaks, leading to his temple, might indicate the chip. He killed Fives, betrayed his people (the Foxgloves) and it could have weaken the chip grip on him (but not broken it completely as his hand, holding the helmet still, shows).

Moreover, this time the Corries are named and surrounding him, this is Fox, not the Commander. The man loved and supported by his troops and that care about them and hold them before himself.

This piece has so many layers, once again. This can be seen as Fox's true face behind his facade. This is far away from the Republic eyes (no camera) and where he feels safe enough to rest. But this is also full of grief, it shows the behind of the precedent piece. The blood, the doubt, the betrayal(s) and the death of the Republic. Betrayals plural because it is Fox betrayal to Rex and Fives, the betrayals caused by the chips, from the Republic, through Palpatine, to the clones and the involuntary one from the clones to the Jedi. But I don't believe it to be after the order 66 exactly, because Thorn's helmet has no distinction to the others. So either all of the Corries are dead. Or Thorn is not dead yet, and it's only Fives' death causing Fox's doubt and weaken belief in the Republic, but also signing its demise by burying the last hope with him (again referencing the white dwarf of the dead Republic).

After the face of the Republic, this shows what lies behind it.

---

Of course, as this is a symbolism analysis, it can have many interpretations and this is only my own take. And those pieces are so detailed that the layers are just stacking over and over on top of each other's. So it can means so many things at the same time !!

This study was incredible to write because every time I stopped on a detail I found more meaning in the entire pieces (really loved the 'Code red' meaning that I discovered in the making of this, for exemple). It's just incredible art and thank you so much Omaano for letting me study a little bit all of that !!!

I hope I've been clear enough in my explanations and that I've made somewhat justice to this beautiful pieces <3

#art analysis #not my art #sw #tcw #commander fox #if i had more knowledge on art nouveau i could have stopped on this part of the iconography more #saldy it's not yet the case so i had to skip those elements :(#but with all of the other details i don't think having less to say is exactly a bad thing xD #hi tumblr void #and thank you whisky for commissioning those beautiful art pieces too !! xD

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cursedvibes · 6 months

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I saw "Gege" was trending in the Jujutsu Kaisen tag on twt, wanted to check it out to see what people were complaining about and...I don't know why I even bother... Yes, I have my criticism with Gege's writing too (as you might have noticed), but in this case it was really all just "Gege is sucking Sukuna off/Sukuna is the main character now". That was the only joke I saw in the tag, barely any actual points made. I always thought that complaint was ridiculous, barely any better than "Fraudkuna". Especially after ch 254. Nothing about the current fight makes it seem like the heroes have absolutely no chance, we're just stretching the time until we get to the actual meat of the fight surrounding the central conflict of Yuuji, Sukuna and Megumi. I get the impression the only reason people think this way is because they assume every character who is currently off screen is dead or permanently out of commission and couldn't possibly show up again in the future.

Besides that, Kusakabe losing to Sukuna isn't Gege over-hyping Sukuna, it's what's to be expected. The setup was already treated like a joke last chapter. If anything Kusakabe was the one getting overhyped (which I think was the point of 70% of the chapter). He's the one getting fan favourite characters say from beyond their grave directly to the "camera" what a strong, kind, beautiful, handsome boy he is. It's not organic or natural either, this wouldn't even work in animation unless you want to constantly jump between quick action shots and half a minute of Mei Mei doing her Kusakabe Character Analysis. I don't think the bit landed for me personally, it went on a little too long in my opinion, but characters going out of their way to praise Kusakabe was very much intentional and much more heavy-handed than anything we got for Sukuna. In his case it was mostly just the observation that grade 1 sorcerers won't be able to do much against him and that assessment has been very consistent. I don't think even Mei Mei, Nanami and Gojo would've said Kusakabe could solo Sukuna. Obviously that's not gonna happen no matter how good he might be otherwise.

I think the problem is how the general progression of the Shinjuku fight is written, not that the protagonists are struggling to take Sukuna down. And also that the group has horrible timing. I don't find it believable that Yuuji, Maki, Choso, Ino, Miguel, Utahime, Ijichi and Gakuganji all just happened to not be around to help Kusakabe out. If Miguel had been a few seconds faster he could've helped Kusakabe hold out until the others arrive, thereby avoiding losing another player and giving Shoko even more work. But no, he had to wait his turn until Kusakabe has been crossed off the list of possible opponents for Sukuna to intervene. That's what makes it so ridiculous in my eyes. They are just passing down the baton between each other. It feels similar although not quite as bad as the kids patiently watching the live stream of Gojo's death before they decide to jump in.

The memes about Gege sucking Sukuna's dick are just so overdone at this point and don't even point towards a real issue. Also funny that they don't say that any time Gojo or some other character who is currently fighting Sukuna gets excessively praised.

#jjk spoilers #jjk leaks #jjk 254

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enigmaticexplorer · 1 month

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I Yearn, and so I Fear - Chapter XXX

Masterlist | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

General Summary. Nearly a year since the Galactic Empire’s rise to power, Kazi Ennari is trying to survive. But her routine is interrupted—and life upended—when she’s forced to cohabitate with former Imperial soldiers. Clone soldiers.

Pairing. Commander Wolffe x female!OC

General Warnings. Canon-typical violence and assault, familial struggles, terminal disease, bigotry, explicit sexual content, death. This story deals with heavy content. If you’re easily triggered, please do not read. For a more comprehensive list of tags, click here.

Fic Rating. E (explicit)/18+/Minors DNI.

Chapter Word Count. 6.0K

15 Kelona

The words dangled in the minimal space separating them. Their eyes were locked on one another.

Wolffe blinked. “What?”

Kazi started to tremble. The vulnerability of her confession combined with the intensity of his gaze left her feeling exposed. Transparent, like the lake.

“You heard me,” she whispered. “I am scared.”

“I…scare you.” A thumb slid along her wrist; Wolffe leaned even closer. She swallowed at his proximity, at the way he was observing her: gentle, bemused, aggravated. Slowly, he repeated, “I scare you.”

“Yes.” The word was a shallow exhale, and she lifted her head. Just enough, so their jaws grazed. “What I feel for you terrifies me.”

His eyes swept across her face, nearly tangible in their analysis. “Why.”

“Because I want to be with you.”

The hand on her wrist spasmed as Wolffe stilled. Kazi let out a choked breath.

“I want to spend the rest of my life with you,” she said angrily, desperately. Her fingers curled into his shirt. “I want holidays with you. I want the good days and the bad days. I want my first gray hairs with you. I want to be with you, and I’m so fucking scared because I can’t control this—”

Large hands were cupping her face; warm lips were on hers.

Wolffe was kissing her.

A kiss most ardent, it promised strained bodies and breathy sighs; strong arms a fortress and tender fingers a solace; carefree smiles and easy laughter.

A kiss so deep, it demanded decadent breakfasts and long, morning strolls; planted orchards and the intimacy of commitment; late night stories and private, honest conversations.

Wolffe held her tightly. So tightly, as if he wanted his hands imprinted into the flesh of her profile and jaw. As if he wanted to bottle this moment—the starlit atmosphere, the visceral yearning, the candid confession—and lock it away forever. As if he wanted to mold their two bodies together and return them to the stardust from which they were formed.

And then he was pulling away, just enough to peer into her face.

“You don’t get to be scared,” he said. Her breathing was loud, erratic, in her ears. His thumbs grazed her cheekbones; their noses brushed. “You don’t get to be fucking scared, Ennari.”

Kazi wrapped her fingers around his forearms, ignorant of pain, concentrated solely on him. “Why not?”

“I’ve made it obvious that I want to be with you.” Wolffe levelled a hard look on her. “Since we first got together—”

“We were enjoying each other, seeing where things went,” she argued. “You can’t expect me to believe that you’ve felt this way since—”

“I bought you that packet of seeds.” A tired smile twitched at the corner of his mouth. “I researched the custom, Kazi. I knew what I was doing. I got Neyti and Daria packets to prove it to you.”

“But that was…”

The events at the Harvest Festival flickered through her mind, a rapid succession of burst shots: some blurry, some clear. However, it was unthinkable, unfathomable, his sincere remark. So illogical, she could only stare incredulously at him. And yet his forthright stare, his frank tone, impugned the emotionally-driven inferences she’d clung to for so long.

“All this time?” she whispered.

“All this time,” he murmured. Soft lips grazed her forehead, her cheek. His hands shifted to her shoulders as he held her gaze; he gave her a light squeeze. “I know this is scary. Yeah? But I see you. I’ve seen all of you, and I’m still here. I want to be here.”

She pursed her lips. “I’m difficult.”

“You’re independent,” he replied equally.

Her eyes narrowed. “I’m stubborn and opinionated.”

His eyes danced. “I don’t mind.”

“I’m a perfectionist and hyper-critical.”

“I know.”

“I’m completely closed off.”

“Yeah. But I’m still here.”*

The simplicity of his responses—his confidence in her—was grating.

“Wolffe.” Kazi scowled her exasperation. “I don’t deserve you—”

“Kazi.” Wolffe let out a harsh chuckle. “You think I haven’t asked myself that same question? Wondered how I deserve you?”

The rawness hoarsening his voice made her wince, and she reached for his jaw. “You deserve so much.”

“Then be with me.” Wolffe spoke with such aplomb—such calm, steady resolution—that she couldn’t help but smile smally. He held her hand to his cheek. Nuzzled her palm. “Please.”

For a fleeting moment, Kazi searched his face. Studied the stars reflected in his eyes and the openness in his expression. Then, the revelation dawned on her, slow, creeping, unfaltering, like the pale yellow of the cresting sun: Her fear was illogical. That damned fear of abandonment as a result of her unworthiness. It was unfounded, absurd. Because this was Wolffe.

The man who challenged her opinions with an omnipresent respect.

The man who had proven himself trustworthy, who acknowledged his mistakes, who dedicated himself to self-improvement.

The man who had seen her hollowed, angry, struggling yet still pursued her, patient but persistent.

Kazi stroked her thumb across the bottom of his scar.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered. “For not trusting you. For making you wait. It wasn’t fair of me, and I’m so sorry—”

“I’d do it again.” Wolffe dug his thumbs into the tips of her shoulders. The gentleness of his half-smile assuaged the firmness of his gaze. “I gave you space because you needed it. But I’d never regret waiting for you. And I’d do it all again. So long as the outcome is the same.”

Once more, she searched his face: a need for assurance, a momentary pause to collect herself. For there was an intimacy in revealing one’s insecurities, one’s worst flaws. An intimacy that transcended the physical. An unequivocal, irrevocable baring of oneself.

But her heart had quieted, its beat the mellifluous splat of raindrops from autumnal leaves. Her body was cast in repose, accepting, willing. And her mind, overrun with such conflicting emotions and warring wants—it had fallen into quiescence.

“I want to get married.”

The statement startled her as much as it did Wolffe. He stiffened, his eyes growing wide.

“I’m not asking to get married today,” she said quickly. “Or tomorrow—”

“Ennari—”

“—but it’s something I’ve wanted since I was a little girl—”

“Kazi.”

She fell silent. Wolffe considered her with a rough, raspy laugh.

“We’ll get married,” he said. A smirk played on his mouth. “After I ask the question.”

An unbidden smile overtook her face, even as a tear tickled her cheek. Gently, he brushed it aside. “Promise?” she asked.

His chuckle was low. “I promise.”

Beneath dewy starlight, surrounded by bioluminescent flora and inquisitive lightning bugs, she smiled, she quietly laughed, she pressed her forehead to his chest and breathed him in. His arms around her back were familiar, the hand intertwined in her hair intimate. It reminded her of spraying waves and jubilant whoops on a bobbing sailboat, colorful shops and the awe of sea creatures discovered, popping firewood and citrusy fruit shared among secretive grins.

“You know,” Kazi said, peering at him, “if you marry me, you’ll be getting Neyti and Daria, too.”

He tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “I always knew it would be the three of you.”

Eventually, they locked themselves in her bedroom, the glow of three moons casting them in an underwater ambiance of flickering shadows and streams of blue. They had spent the last few hours packing the house and transferring the boxes to the men’s ship. Their new plan: to leave for Ceaia in the morning.

The moons were at their zenith, sunrise far off, and they were caught between the respite of confessions and the relief of mutual affections.

Naked, Kazi stood between Wolffe’s legs, bruised knuckles tracing her ribcage, the underside of her breasts. From where he sat on the edge of the bed, he surveyed her body as an artist would study his muse. A cock to his head. Lowered lashes. Parted lips. His hands spanned her waist, his breath warmed the skin between her breasts where he placed a light, teasing kiss. Her sigh was breathy; a smattering of goosebumps dotted her arms. He smiled in response. Lazy, amused.

But his relaxed countenance quickly shifted when he reached for her hurt hand.

“I should’ve been there,” he said quietly.

“Wolffe.” Kazi murmured his name with half-hearted chastisement. He continued to assess her hand, his hold gentle, careful as he grazed the color purpling her knuckles. “I’ve always known how important the missions are to you—”

“I’m done.” He looked up at her, his face set. “I did what I could. The guilt…” His throat bobbed and he cleared his throat. “I’m ready to move on.”

Kazi tilted his chin back, to look him in the eye, to cup his jaw. Silent gestures to acknowledge the difficultness of his decision. Wolffe kissed her palm and, as she played with a curl, he lowered his face to her stomach. A chaste kiss warmed her navel. Another teased her breast. And another tickled her hip.

Scattered kisses and wandering fingers, closed eyes and carefree smiles encouraged them into bed.

Splayed beneath Wolffe, with his head settled against her chest, Kazi told him about the house she’d bought. How, nestled among ash-painted trees and dark evergreens, it overlooked the ocean. How the abundance of rooms offered privacy for his brothers, if they chose to live with them. How the plot of land accommodated gardens and orchards and a possible bee farm.

Soon, a half-smirk and curiously arched brow led to a historical and cultural recount of Ceaian marriage traditions: Traditionalists preferred a pilgrimage to the religious isles in the south where Luss—the dragon of unity—was buried, as a grand gesture of celebration; Reformists maintained marriage a duty and emphasized a humble, local ceremony.

The conversation reminded her of Neyti and the adoption, but her attempt to apologize was interrupted by his quiet “I already know.” A memory pulsed through her: a cracked open window and a silhouette hunched over a puzzle.

“I had to make the decision,” she said, kissing his jaw. “On my own.”

“I know. But, Kazi”—he grasped her chin—“she’s mine now. As much as she is yours. That clear?”

She kissed his scar. “Yes.”

As the hour latened, conversation gave way to long expanses of sleepy silence, their touches heavy and lingering. But there was one thing, something she had avoided for months, that Kazi needed to understand.

“Wolffe?”

“Mm-hmm?”

She hesitated. “What was the first holofilm you saw?”

An exasperated exhale tickled her neck as he raised his head. “What do you know about it?”

“Nothing,” she said with a small shrug. “I was only told to ask you about it.”

An annoyed roll of his eyes and a muttered “Fox” followed. Wolffe hesitated, brushing hair from her forehead, and then said, “Fox, Cody, and I were competitive. When we were young.”

Kazi snorted, and he levelled a bland look on her. Her disbelieving smile went ignored.

“We liked to challenge one another,” Wolffe said. “See what things we’d get away with. One night, we decided to slice into a Kaminoan computer and download a holofilm. They were contraband and we’d never seen one.” He shrugged. “We thought a war film was a good idea. See other soldiers. Watch them in action.”

While Wolffe spoke, a subtle change overtook his expression: a distant look in his eyes, a half-smile starting to form.

“We were looking through the film options when the door opened. Cody and Fox ran for the vent but I didn’t. I wanted that film.” He flashed her a cocky grin. “I downloaded the first one I saw. When we got back to the barracks, we started it. ‘Cept it wasn’t what we’d wanted.”

She frowned. “It wasn’t a war film?”

“No.” He chuckled. “It was a romance. About a soldier.”

Kazi laughed. “You must’ve been devastated.”

“Cody and Fox were pissed. They went to bed but I decided to watch it.”

An expectant pause fell. Then, he told her about the film.

A soldier, having survived a war, returned home to his farm. The farm sat on a plot of land shared with his neighbor. The soldier spent his days planting crops and caring for the animals, tiring himself so that he could sleep at night.

One day, while reading a book beneath the willow tree near the river, a woman appeared. Flustered after an argument with her father, she’d sought the willow for solace. The soldier offered to leave. The woman refused. Instead, they whiled away the afternoon in mutual silence. The next afternoon, the soldier returned to the willow. The woman greeted him with a basket of cookies. They indulged, together.

Afternoons, regardless of rain, were spent beneath the willow tree chatting, strolling the river, swapping stories. The soldier asked her to marry him; she agreed. However, the woman’s father—the soldier’s neighbor—refused. That night, unbeknownst to the soldier, the father shipped his daughter away. The soldier searched for her. He couldn’t find her.

Years passed. Each afternoon the soldier sat beneath the willow. He told it about his day: the good, the bad. He referred to the willow by his lover’s name. Eventually the neighbor passed away. The woman returned; she’d left the man her father forced her to marry. Days later, the soldier and the woman married. A few weeks of bliss ensued, and then the woman fell ill. She died a few months later.

The film concluded with the soldier, old and gray-haired, sitting beneath the willow, telling her about his day.

“I was a young boy when I watched that film,” Wolffe said. “I’d spent my entire life being told that I was a soldier. I wanted to be a soldier. We all did. But…we didn’t know that there were other options.” He released a heavy breath. His knuckles skimmed her jawline. “I don’t regret being a soldier. But I also wanted more for my life. And that film was the first time I realized there could be more. That I could have more. It changed everything.”

Kazi pressed a hand to his chest, and Wolffe acquiesced her unspoken request. He settled onto his back, his attention unwavering on her. With a gentle smile, she straddled his thighs and placed a kiss against his cheek.

“You were a good soldier, Wolffe,” she murmured. “And you’re an even better man.”

Her second kiss—a tender touch to his throat with a light tease of her tongue—earned her a soft exhale. She kissed his collarbone next, and the inside of his biceps soon followed. Beneath her, he was pliant, muscles tautened at her exploration, and yet malleable to her touch.

As her tongue mapped ribcages and stomach muscles and the lines of his hips, he grabbed her arms. Held her still. His cock was dripping; his eyes were half-lidded with want. But he merely motioned her closer, into the heat of his chest, the clutch of his arms, the embrace of his neck.

“This is what I’ve wanted,” Wolffe murmured. “For a long time.”

She brought his mouth to hers and confessed, “It’s what I’ve wanted, too.”

16 Kelona

Kazi rechecked the rucksack on the kitchen counter.

“Are the dragons still in there?” At the laughter in her sister’s voice, she rolled her eyes. Daria rounded the kitchen corner to stand beside her. “They haven’t flown away in the fifteen minutes since you last checked?”

“No,” Kazi muttered, shoving an uneaten citrus-star inside the bag. Quick snaps buttoned the bag closed, and she rubbed her hands together. “It’s just…I feel unprepared for this.”

“This was the original plan,” Daria remarked. She angled her head back and scanned the skylights. Black clouds, swollen with unshed rain, enshrouded the night sky. “We’ll be okay.”

Kazi gave a curt nod; her sister was correct, after all. For days, they intended to depart on a public transport rather than leave on the men’s ship. However, the sudden change earlier this morning—the men’s decision to leave Eluca—had thrown her off-kilter.

A hard knock on her door had awoken her and Wolffe. Only an hour had passed since they’d fallen asleep. With a concerned frown, Wolffe answered the door. The dim hallway light revealed Fox outfitted in his black armor.

She’d known then that something was wrong. Wolffe’s overt agitation confirmed her mounting unease: rigid spine, angry whispers, a grim look in her direction.

The moment he closed the door behind Fox, she let the sheet fall away. “What happened?”

“That missing ship I told you about”—Wolffe perched himself on the edge of the bed—“just heard that they went down. They’re stranded. Need a rescue. And we’re closer than Rex.”

“You’re wondering if it’s safe enough to bring us,” she said.

“They’re stranded on a remote planet.” He scrubbed his jaw. In his momentary pause, she could see him strategizing. The narrow-eyed calculation of risks. The jaw-clenched assessment of various plans. “They weren’t followed. It should be safe.”

“How many men?”

“Five.”

“It’ll be crowded.” Kazi placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder. “We’ll take the transport—”

“No. I told you—”

“Wolffe.” Frustration stiffened his posture, and she offered him a small smile. “It’s the only way.”

He shook his head. “I’ll travel with you. The others can man the ship without me.”

Kazi laughed at the absurd suggestion but sobered when she noticed the grim set to his jaw.

“No,” she said quickly. “Security at the spaceport is intense. They’ll recognize you.” Wolffe remained stubbornly resistant; she stiffened, clutching his arm in desperation. “Wolffe, please. They will know that you’re a clone. They’ll grab you. They’ll interrogate you—”

“Ennari—”

“You’ll jeopardize Neyti and Daria. You’ll jeopardize me.”

“I know.” He ran a hand down his face, glared at the opposite wall, thinking hard, and then exhaled a bitter breath. “We’ll meet you at the Naboo spaceport.”

“Take Fluffy with you,” she said. Her attempt at sportiveness fell flat. Instead, she rested her forehead against his, taking his hand in hers. “We’ll be okay.”

A low boom of thunder rattled the windowpanes in the kitchen. Overhead, electric-white lightning fractured: blinding, branching, lighting the black sky in a display of sheer power that could rival the sun in its intensity.

“Kazi.” The deceptive calm in her sister’s voice forced her to return her attention to Daria. But her sister was staring at the kitchen counter. “Why do you have that?”

Kazi followed her sister’s gaze to the small blaster near the sink. She grimaced. Hastily, she tossed a hand cloth over the blaster, hiding it from view. But her sister continued to stare at the counter.

“I told Wolffe that I’d keep it with me until we arrive at the spaceport,” Kazi said. She knew the blaster unnerved Daria. A possible lapse in memory could result in tragedy. She added, “Just in case.”

Daria’s nod was stilted. “I understand,” she murmured.

Silence settled between them offset by the rolling thunder. Kazi took the opportunity to survey her sister. Hollows were visible to her once naturally-blushed cheeks. Her collarbones protruded against her skin. Her former curves and muscles had thinned. Not even a year had passed since they left Ceaia and yet Daria looked so different.

The return home, regardless of the difficulties with her medicine, would be good for Daria. The freshness of the ocean breeze and the familiarity of Outlook Harbor created an idyllic setting for her final days.

Kazi straightened, tucked her hands into the back pockets of her trousers, and smiled. “We’re getting married.”

Daria leaned against the counter with shrewd analysis. “Tattoos?”

Traditionalists and Reformists differed in their beliefs, customs, and celebrations on several fronts. However, both practiced one significant custom: the tattooing of a partner’s initials into the inner skin of the fourth finger. A symbol of eternal commitment. For only death and its inevitable weathering of skin and bones could remove the tattoo.

“I told Wolffe about it,” Kazi said. She struggled to smother her smile. “He said he’d been wanting a new tattoo for some time.”

Daria gave a quiet laugh but quickly turned thoughtful. “I’m happy for you,” she said. “I’m really happy for you, Zee.”

Kazi bit the inside of her cheek with a small, grateful nod. The groan of the pipes allowed her a moment of reprieve—Neyti must have finished her shower—and she glanced at the chrono. They were due to meet Fehr in half an hour.

Realizing the time, too, Daria made her way toward the kitchen table where she tugged on her boots. Her labored breathing convinced Kazi to recheck the rucksack for her nighttime potion—

“I’d like to go sailing.” The sudden comment made her glance at her sister. Daria sat with her hands clasped proprietarily in her lap. A nervous smile dimpled her cheeks. “I know I haven’t been in years—”

“I’ll take you,” Kazi said. At the thought of sailing with Daria again—the possibility of finding a narwhal pod and perhaps swimming among the curious cetaceans—she grinned. “Whenever you want.”

“I was thinking my life day.” In two months, then. Daria corrected a wrinkle in her loose, white dress. “I think I would like to visit the islet and see the turtles. One more time.”

“I think that’s a good idea,” Kazi said quietly. “We can—”

The front door smashed open.

Kazi flinched back a step, staring wide-eyed at the hallway. Before she could grasp the situation, before she could react, a blaster emerged from the shadows. It was aimed at her chest.

Her heart collapsed, stuttered, and then pounded into a terrified flurry.

“Hello, Kazi dear.”

Kazi blanched. “Magistrate Aro?”

The buttery lights of the main level warped the magistrate into a waxy luster. His dark skin had taken on a pallor; his lips were pale, drooping at the sides.

“What—” Kazi looked from the blaster to the magistrate. “What’s going on?”

“You betrayed me.” With the blaster still aimed in her direction, Magistrate Aro stumbled around the bookcase, toward the opposite side of the kitchen counter. His walk was uncoordinated, similar to a drunk traversing dunes. “You outsmarted me,” he said, “and for that I must say, well done.”

“There must be a misunderstanding,” Kazi said. She raised her hands in a placating manner; they shook. “I don’t know what you’re talking about—”

“Don’t lie.” The magistrate’s shout echoed eerily across the main level. He sucked in a sharp breath, readjusted his ornate robes, faced her with a renewed sense of composure. He smiled. “I know that you are a rebel spy, Ms. Lucien.”

She felt the blood drain from her face. “I don’t know what—”

“Spare me.” He spoke with a singsong lilt. Like he was a schoolboy taunting her on the playground. “All this time I trusted you, and yet you were spying on me”—he looked at Daria— “and harboring another spy—”

“She’s not a spy.” Kazi dropped the pretense of innocence. She regarded the magistrate with cold disgust. “She’s not a part of the rebel network. She knows nothing.”

The magistrate stared at her unblinking and then he fixed his blaster on Daria. Kazi clung to the edge of the counter to steady herself. At the kitchen table, Daria stood frozen.

“Don’t—”

“I believed you for so long,” Magistrate Aro murmured. A wounded pout jutted his lower lip. “You were so clever, my dear Kazi. I trusted you. I was yours.”

The distance between her and the magistrate was too far. He would either injure or kill Daria before she could stop him.

“But then I saw an interesting report.” The magistrate feigned a frown. “You accessed my prison’s schematics. It was so unusual. Why? I asked myself. But I trusted you, so I let it go.” Spittle dribbled from the corner of his mouth. “And then your most recent analysis came in.”

Kazi frowned. Her analyses were solid, a testament to her education and honed skillset over the years—

“Your analysis claimed that the old Republic outpost received another transmission.” The magistrate blinked, his pupils tiny dots against the red veins webbing the whites of his eyes. His hand dipped, the barrel of the blaster drooping. “I didn’t understand. I had the transmission tower decommissioned after my investigation.”

The air seemed to vanish from her lungs.

She remembered the data manipulation. Hell, she’d even told Wolffe about it when trying to delay her talk with Neyti. The possibility of the magistrate tampering with the transmission tower hadn’t crossed her mind once.

“I did not want to believe it,” the magistrate continued. “But I had to have you investigated. It riddled me with guilt, you must know.” He sighed. “I learned that you registered a flight plan last Telona. A food export carrier. And yet you have not claimed any exports in the trade books. I realized your flight plan was a cover. To ferry rebels to and from my planet.”

Kazi gritted her teeth. She’d known that registering the flight plan was too risky. And it didn’t matter that the magistrate’s conclusion was wrong. (The flight plan was for Wolffe, not the rebel network.) Still, the registration was suspicious. She’d merely hoped no one would investigate it.

“Alas, you played me well,” Magistrate Aro conceded. He mocked a bow, twirling his blaster haphazardly. “However, I have won, in the end. My stormtroopers will be here in minutes. You will accompany them to the capital where you will reveal all that you know of the rebel network and its clone conspirators.” He paused and then winked. “Do cooperate. I would rather keep you to myself than relinquish you to ISB.”

A chill sunk into her bones. “Keep me?”

“Oh yes.” He smiled. A maniacal smile born from the unnatural coupling between paranoia and megalomania. “You will be an example for the people. Who better than a rebel-turned-Imperial whore?”

The magistrate barked a laugh—a sound so grotesque the hairs along her neck raised. He licked his lips and then his eyebrows shot up.

“I will make you a deal.” The magistrate grinned. “Do as I say—come with my stormtroopers willingly—and I will allow this woman to live.” He shook his blaster in Daria’s direction, a limp-wristed flourish rather than proper aim. “Resist and I will kill her.”

“No.” The single word reverberated across the main level. Daria comported herself with an aristocratic glare. A reproving expression honed by several years at finishing school. “Don’t do it, Kazi.”

“Daria,” Kazi said in an even, cold tone. Her sister frowned at her. “You’ll do as the magistrate says.”

Daria started to protest but Kazi ignored her. She concentrated on Magistrate Aro. He was watching them, simultaneously perplexed and intrigued, like a youngling at a magic show. When Kazi met his gaze, he schooled his features. And it was that reaction—the cunning behind his self-effacing, falsely magnanimous mask—that confirmed his spurious offer.

Magistrate Aro wouldn’t allow Daria to live. The moment Kazi accepted his proposal, he would kill her. He would probably kill Neyti, too.

The conclusion left her with one choice.

So Kazi didn’t hesitate as she lunged for the cloth-covered blaster, drawing the magistrate’s full attention.

She didn’t second-guess her decision as she aimed the blaster, trusting her analysis of his character: that his self-preservation would dominate his reaction.

She didn’t flinch as she pulled the trigger.

Time stretched, Eluca’s axial rotation stalled, a branch of lightning spiderwebbed across the sky.

The magistrate looked down at his chest. He fumbled to pull apart his robes. Vermillion blood stained his white undershirt, a small pool that thickened and enlarged.

Kazi pulled the trigger again.

The magistrate looked at her. His lips parted. He gurgled, blood spurting from his mouth.

She fired the blaster again.

The magistrate collapsed to his knees.

She walked toward his crumbling body, aimed the blaster at his head, and shot him once more.

And then silence, a calm foreboding, settled across the house. Not even the heavens dared to cry.

Kazi stared at the body lying prone on the recently mopped floor. The gravity of the situation pressed on her: overwhelming, damning.

The main level distorted—her vision tunneled; a ticking sounded in the back of her mind. Her hands started to shake. Her breaths quickened. She stepped away from the body, the blaster falling from her clutch, and then she took in the chrono. They didn’t have much time.

“Take Neyti to the spaceport,” Kazi said. She spoke calmly, if a little inhumanly, returning to the kitchen to retrieve the rucksack. “Get on the transport and get out of here. Wolffe will meet you both on Naboo—”

“Kazi.” Her name was a soft admonishment. Daria sighed, resigned. “You’re going with Neyti.”

“I can’t.” Extracting a small box from the rucksack—suddenly grateful for the rebel network’s foresight—she approached Daria and pushed the bag into her arms. “The stormtroopers will be here any minute. As soon as they realize what happened, they’ll shut down the spaceports. No one will be able to leave until they find the culprit. If I turn myself in, the spaceports will stay open long enough that you and Neyti can leave.”

“But—”

“The chain codes are in the bag,” she instructed. “You need to go—”

“Kazi.”

“Tell Wolffe—” His name punctured a hole in her composure. Her voice broke. But they didn’t have time; she needed to remain in control, for just a bit longer. “Tell him—”

She sucked in a shallow breath. There was so much to tell him. Gratitude for the last year. Apology for the shortness of their time. An order for the future, to find happiness—

Daria shoved the rucksack into her arms with enough force she stumbled backward.

“You’ll tell Wolffe yourself,” Daria said. “You will take Neyti to the spaceport, and you will go home, and you will live the life you always wanted.”

Far too many seconds elapsed before Kazi understood Daria’s intent. She shook her head, her smile wan. “No. This is my fault and I won’t let you—”

“I am going to die, Kazi.” Daria held out her hands to encompass her withering body. “I am going to die sometime soon, so why not now? At least this way I can go with my memories still intact. I’ll remember you, and Mama and Papa, and Neyti, and Cody.”

Kazi straightened. “You’re my little sister—”

“I’m also my own person,” Daria said. “I have spent my entire life fulfilling the expectations set for me, and now I have the chance to make my own decision regarding my life. You have a future, Zee, one that I can’t have. So fight for it.”

“I can’t let you make this decision,” Kazi said. The seconds on the chrono seemed to be counting faster. Urgency thrummed through her veins. Get them out, it demanded. Get them out now. “You need to go—”

“Kazi—”

“Please, Daria,” she whispered brokenly. Her chest constricted tightly; she was finding it harder to breathe. “Please don’t make me choose—”

“Mum?”

The word hung in the air: quiet with confusion, soft with worry. Slowly, Kazi turned around.

Balanced between two stairsteps teetered Neyti. A tiny hand grasped the railing; strands of wet hair gathered around her shoulders. The little girl looked between Kazi and Daria before taking in the dead male on the floor. Her mouth parted.

“Neyti.” Kazi beckoned to her. The youngling hurried forward, tiptoeing around the blood seeping across the wooden floor. Her shoulders were hunched, her eyes darting. There wasn’t time for consolation, though. Kazi ushered Neyti toward the sunroom, speaking quickly. “Something has happened. You and Daria are going to leave—”

Neyti halted. She searched her face. “What about you?”

“I can’t go with you,” Kazi said gently. Neyti started to back away, tugging on her dragon necklace, her lower lip quivering with refusal. Kazi mustered a reassuring smile. “Neyti, I can’t—”

A low rumble sounded beyond the shattered front door.

She tensed. Her head spun, dizzied by the terror seeping through her veins. She pressed a palm against her forehead. Tried to stifle the pain throbbing behind her eyes—

“I will do this, Kazi. I’m not scared.” Daria stood in front of her, a portrait of poise, and grabbed her hand, replacing the small box with a necklace. The necklace she’d gifted her sister for the winter holiday. “I’m not scared anymore.”

A memory sputtered to life: two little girls cowering inside a lighthouse, a storm raging outside. Her six-year-old sister curled into her. I’m not scared, Kazi. Not when you’re with me.

“You have a family, a future, a life,” Daria said, closing her fingers around the necklace. “So go and live.”

“Daria—”

A tug on her sweater cut her off. Kazi looked down at Neyti. The youngling stared back, fear wrinkling her forehead, her stormy eyes frantic. She clung to the sweater, knuckles white, like she could prevent Kazi from leaving her.

And it was the sight of this little girl—a little girl who had lost so much, who had suffered too much—that rived Kazi’s heart in two. For the choice was clear. Even though it would steal her past, her childhood, her sister from her.

She would forever hate herself for this decision. But she had to make it.

And as she moved, the memories swam before her: dances in rain puddles (she lifted her head), daring climbs among the sequoia trees (she hefted the rucksack across her back), freeing wild sea creatures from fishermen's catches (she grabbed Neyti's hand), citrus-stars split beneath ancients constellations (she faced her little sister).

“Write me a letter,” Daria said. Her benign smile carried a hint of wistfulness. “Promise me you will.”

Kazi swallowed. “I promise.”

Beneath the partition between the living area and the sunroom, she paused. Her gaze met Daria’s. She started to speak—

Doors slammed outside the front of the house. Kazi took in her sister one final time, and as Daria gave her a solemn nod, she and Neyti rushed into the backyard.

Bold lights limned the elder trees and swaying ferns. A torchlight swarmed the side of the house and Kazi ducked. She held her breath, waiting.

The light flitted away and she yanked Neyti toward the jungle. Toward a path she had routed.

Bioluminescent mosses lit their path. Tree roots snagged at their legs.

The moonless night cast the dense thicket of wild jungle in a darkness reminiscent of the ocean on a moonless night.

A root caught her ankle and she fell. Thorny flora scraped her palms. Her ankle twinged as she regained her feet. Concern widened Neyti’s eyes.

“I’m okay,” Kazi whispered. Grabbing Neyti’s hand, she led the little girl onward. “We have to keep going.”

Sweaty, their hair snagged with twigs and hands dirty, Kazi and Neyti emerged at the edge of Hollow’s Town. A comm call to Fehr, a brisk explanation, and the older woman retrieved them.

The clouds unshed their wrath, gray sheets of rain thrashing the earth, as if the skies had waited with baited breath and were now intent on purging the earth of the spilled blood.

News over the radio confirmed an incident involving the magistrate. Kazi stared out the aircar’s window, rubbing the family portrait within Daria’s locket.

The spaceport was crowded for such a late hour. Kazi and Neyti wound their way through security. The rucksack was cleared. Their chain codes were accepted. They hurried to their transport and boarded, taking their seats in the far back.

Minutes passed, Kazi clenched and unclenched her hands, keeping watch over the platforms, and then the transport’s doors closed. The pilot told them to fasten their seatbelts in preparation for departure.

The transport grumbled to life. Exhaust steamed the windows and they started to rise.

From her seat overlooking the spaceport, she watched as stormtroopers rushed inside. Access gates across the port closed. Red lights blared warnings.

Neyti curled into her. Kazi held her.

The transport jerked forward and they exited the port, taking to the stormy skies. Lightning glowed among the clouds around them, random bursts protected by the thick cloud cover.

Outside Eluca’s atmosphere, the transport set a steady pace, its sublight speed nauseatingly slow. And then the cold reality of the last hour finally set in.

Kazi exhaled a sharp, painful breath. She dug her fingernails into her thighs. She ground her teeth until her jaw was aching and her lungs were constricting and her eyes were burning.

Her sister was gone.

Masterlist | Chapter 29 | A Muse

A/N: Read “A Muse” for additional story context.

* Lines inspired by When Harry Met Sally (1989): “I’m difficult.” “You’re challenging.” “I’m too structured. I’m completely closed off.” “Yeah, but in a good way.”

#I Yearn and so I Fear #commander wolffe x oc: kazi ennari

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weirdmageddon · 11 months

Text

long meditation on jade and dave's relationship - part 1

here's a three-part heavy homestuck meta. took me about 3 days to scrobble together and format and everything

part 2 part 3 cooking

i apologize in advance for the disorganization of my thoughts. after writing it i realized this is probably one of the clearest glances into how my mind thinks associatively so everything relates in some way to something else in here. the foundations for my thoughts might be invisible to others because they can’t see the connections ive built upon but you can probably see them here, and that strong foundation is also why i care so much about them and why i chose to lay it all out. sometimes i feel like i have Got to get this tangled associative web out of my head and into some form of writing so other people can be like, “oh so This is why you have so much to say” and can just. see into my head and where it all comes from for me. people have expressed interest and the general opinion tends to be that people like hearing my thoughts a lot so yeah. pov you are in my brainwebs. seatbelts everyone get on the magic school bus in that bitch

some time ago i saw this post i saw as i was going through florals jade tag again. my homestuck hyperfixation flared up again and ive been hyperfocused on dave and jade and particular just absolutely entering these monotropic black holes over them and turning them around at different angles and looking at discussions and what people thought both now and in the past and now that im older i can appreciate them even more. ive always been a fan of dave and jade both, but i cant even lie dave has my whole heart so maybe im biased as well. but i like to believe that regardless of my liking for dave and interest in not even x-ray scanning him just straight up 3D mri scanning him and rotating him in my head that my argument is still very reasonable. i just understand his psychology a lot

i want to preface this by saying i absolutely love floral and im so glad she’s on the hsbc team because i know she can do jade harley justice. one of the best jadesters fr. we all come into media analysis with different personal experiences and perspectives, and i understand this was from her perspective as someone who had run ins with dumb boys and relates a lot to jade which is why she can put so much love into her <3 i just found myself disagreeing with some of the arguments that she presented in that post just as a peer who also read the comic from my own perspective. keep in mind i also love jade to bits and want the best for her

so yea this isn’t a targeted post at all. it just got the juices flowing and inspired me to actually write my pre-existing thoughts down and i used it as a springboard for them

i think it ended up being pretty insightful overall especially because i was stoned as fuck writing it and ive come to realize being stoned amplifies and improves the output of my deeply inwardly associative thought processes tenfold. or maybe weed just changes how significant it feels. maybe a little of both

part 1: on using davesprite as a basis for interpreting jade's relationship with all daves

i love what hussie does with alternate versions of characters and. it’s one of the coolest things about homestuck’s characterization. like floral quoted:

… we see that Jack is a simple man, no matter what name he goes by. He is, if not much else (and he’s not), impatient and violent. We only got the briefest glimpse into these qualities when we were first introduced to him on Derse. But now we get to spend much more time with him, albeit in the form of a completely different character. This is another bit of sneaky utility provided by this intermission tangent. It serves as an arc to help indirectly characterize the villain of the early acts. Having multiple copies of a character operating in totally different circumstances turns out to be a great stealth characterization tactic, and it gets used much more aggressively later in the story. In fact, it proves to be inseparable from one of the story’s most essential themes. (Hussie’s Intermission commentary)

so i agree in principle and think the alt self thing is fucking brilliant

however, i disagree with the argument it’s supporting.

So, not the same character, but if switched, I would go out on a limb and say that Dave would experience all the same issues as Davesprite did, but without the “bird” part acting as an easy explanation. That doesn’t make Dave responsible but it does speak volumes to how their personalities respond to each other, insinuates that a relationship involving any Dave would end badly for Jade and that “Real” Dave indeed has Some Issues To Deal With.

i don't agree that dave and davesprite should be compared in this context. yes they are splinters of the same character and floral is right on the money in that canon deflecting the relationship failing on "bird issues" doesn't really explain anything meaningful, but i do not think its the case that all of jade’s relationships with dave are doomed to fail because of what we saw with jade and davesprite.

yes, if switched, dave strider would be practically identical to davesprite since they were the same exact person until a branch in the timeline

however, it's the unique things davesprite has been through that made him like this. davesprite has baggage that dave doesn't. a timeline where john was tricked into fighting his denizen early and died and jade couldn't get in on time and was presumably wiped out dinosaur style on earth. with alt future dave's year-worth of knowledge, gear, loot, and experience, he rescinded his player status and "realness" as a human person to be a game guide for his naive past self right before the timeline split in order for himself and his friends to continue existing.

that would mess anyone up mentally. it's no wonder he's jaded, no pun intended. he's depressed as shit and bitter and probably has trauma issues unrelated to his bro, though they do compound on it. yes they both experienced bro's abuse but i'm talking about the differences between alpha timeline dave and davesprite; right now im not going to talk about things that are the same about them prior to the timeline split because it applies to them both so it's redundant.

essentially what's setting them apart is their experiences playing sburb, their chronological age (alt future dave/davesprite had been making timeloops over a span of four months and he says that in total the time from his chronological perspective is close to a YEAR in sburb grinding shit out before he goes back), their relationship to their friends and how their friends see them and how they see themselves, their ontological natures as beings, what their purposes are.

davesprite had his ontological status as a person and purpose changed. he assumed he'd be the one playing and doing important main shit in the alpha timeline with all his friends but then it turns out that wasn't the case due to the events that went down in his timeline. and becoming a sprite solidly changed his degree of existence. davesprite's best friend john asking if he can talk to "the real dave" is when i think he realized just how fucked up his existence as a person has become despite him doing pretty much everything for everyone for nearly a YEAR before the alpha timeline was even able to get properly started. if davesprite didn’t exist, nobody would have (john needed to live to do ectobiology). davesprite knew this and weaponized it against john who john treated as a secondary, lesser dave. so of course he’s kind of an asshole. it’s like his efforts and sacrifices meant squat to the people he considered his best friends because they didn’t experience it. to john he just suddenly appeared from the future and became a sprite.

this is heavy shit for davesprite that alpha timeline dave does NOT have to go through and it did change him in ways that cannot be said about alpha timeline dave. this is not a universal dave experience. so while it’s true that dave has the capacity of act like davesprite under those exact circumstances, alpha timeline dave didn’t undergo those that led to davesprite’s more miserable traits. therefore i don’t think it’s fair to conflate jade’s failed relationship with davesprite in particular as informing of how most of jade and dave’s relationships would unfold, because davesprite has been in exceptionally tragic circumstances, coming to terms with the state of his own existence. the last thing davesprite needs is romance. alpha timeline dave does not carry this burden.

Everyone believed that what was creating the dissonance wasn’t a central part to Dave’s character but an aftereffect of Bird Syndrome. Which you can’t blame them for because there’s nothing that would lead them to think differently. Every character besides Dirk is completely in the dark about Bro’s abuse and Dave stated he’d probably never tell any of the Betas. Which is fine, no one’s owed to know somebody’s baggage. But when you don’t give people a means to understand what you’re going through, especially when it leads you to hurt them, its only inevitable everyone’s going to be confused and going to come to conclusions using what they do know.

rebuttal to this: as i said earlier i don’t buy the whole bird issues thing and i get the handwaviness about being fused with a bird being john’s explanation for davesprite’s bullshittery. however i think it’s important to mention that john and jade both question if becoming a sprite might have had something to do with his change.

being fused with a bird never bothered him, as jade says. it was all the other baggage that came with the prototyping.

this includes playing the game for way longer than anyone else and mindlessly grinding from the ground up for about a year, then turning himself into a game construct and having his ontological level of existence as the platonic ideal form of dave strider lowered in the eyes of his friends.

JOHN: like what? JADE: its hard to explain JADE: just some slight differences in personality i guess JOHN: he still raps sometimes. JADE: yes... JADE: so? JOHN: i just thought i would mention that. JADE: ok i will admit i cant really tell if his rapping style has changed JOHN: trust me, it hasn't. JADE: i dont know if the differences are because he is a sprite JADE: or because he lived for a while in a different timeline... (p.4733)

JOHN: why is he such a basket case? he's like regular dave, but like, aloof enigma edition. JOHN: maybe it's because he's part bird? i think becoming a bird and a sprite did something weird to him. JADE: i dont think being a bird ever bothered him JADE: like i said... its all more complicated than that JOHN: normal dave was so much more level headed. JOHN: i have to admit, i spend a lot of time wondering what he and rose are up to. JADE: me too JOHN: ehh... JOHN: maybe it's for the best he broke up with you. JADE: why? JOHN: well, what kind of future do you think you would have with him? JOHN: he's a sprite. like really, what even is a sprite? how long do they live? will he still be around if we win the new game we are allegedly trying to get to? JADE: i dont know (p.5294)

as for the bro abuse thing, i can’t tell if floral’s position here is that davesprite is fucked up and had a failed relationship with jade because of bro’s abuse, and that dave would also necessarily have failed relationships with jade because he had the same experiences and also doesn’t tell anybody? the wording there is kind of vague and can be interpreted in different ways but that’s how i interpreted it.

they are right that bro’s abuse is something dave keeps to himself. but remember that dave has also deluded himself about it to cope. he doesn’t know what to think of it himself. both alpha timeline dave and davesprite have this baggage, but we explore it more with alpha timeline dave.

i know dave said in the post-retcon timeline when having a conversation with dirk that he could never tell karkat all of this or any of the betas about his abuse. but i still find this pesterlog interesting and i want to put a spotlight on it. even while dave was still chugging that copium, jade was the person he was closest to opening up about the nature of his relationship to his bro at this point. remember this is quite early on in the comic and he didn’t have 3 years on the meteor to contemplate it yet when he said this to her, his bro had just died at this point

GG: anyway dave im really sorry about your bro/dad GG: you were pretty close with him right? TG: meh it was a pretty bizarre relationship by any standard TG: fightin off wave after wave of face pumicing puppet ass every day TG: always being on guard for stealth attacks in the middle of the night while getting up to go to the fucking bathroom GG: heheh TG: but i guess it all sorta amounted to some vague unspoken semblance of kinship TG: if thats a thing TG: like if honor among thieves is something then lets call it camaraderie among ironic rapping roof ninjas TG: but thanks GG: sure TG: i thought about taking his sword TG: when i was there TG: but i couldnt TG: couldnt really bring myself to try to pull it out it was too weird GG: dave we have to stop him!!!!! TG: what GG: jack! GG: he shouldnt get away with this TG: you think (p.3204)

even if he’s in denial about it, deciding to point out the positivity he can rationalize about it to avoid spending too much time thinking deeply about it (it makes him uncomfortable), he’s getting closer to acknowledging the truth here that shit wasn’t normal, about it being “bizarre” and you can tell hes being genuine here when he thanks jade for her concern about his loss

dave then continues talking about his thoughts/feelings on the situation after jade says “sure”, as if he took her concern as an invite to open up about his thoughts even when it’s something vulnerable for him that he tried putting on false bravado in front of terezi about. jade then abruptly changes topic to what’s to be practically done about these tragedies—dave was still on the topic of his bro and she changed the topic to jack noir without clarifying, hence he goes “what”

this is interesting because terezi tried to get something out of him about this and was met by riddly puzzlecock and false bravado but he’s pretty straight up about his current feelings with jade. basically it really depends on the person dave is talking to.

in this specific argument, floral approaches grimbark jade solely from the position of her being uninhibited which is true in many ways, but grimbark jade is also quite nefarious and not in her right mind. i think that even if jade were unihibited and spoke her mind, she wouldn’t have it in her push the mayor into lava to get dave to fight her. thats the evil. floral does acknowledge this in a separate post though, but it’s not really touched on in her argument im discussing. i also want to reiterate that even though it might seem like im violently ripping this post limb from limb its really just something to bounce my pre-existing thoughts off of. this is all written with civility towards and respect for floral

even roxy says something about this—that the schtick doesnt suit her. like it doesnt feel like something she’d have the natural capacity to really be without some external influence

ROXY: so alt grannydaughter english ROXY: whyre u part dog + evil lookin JADE: DO NOT CALL ME THAT!!! ROXY: what JADE: my surname is harley not english JADE: but you may refer to me as jade, or ma'am if you are feeling especially nervous and deferential JADE: which as it turns out is the way you should be feeling about me, ALWAYS >:B ROXY: LOL!!! JADE: lol WHAT ROXY: jade i am in no way buying that ur normally this pompous and tyrannical ROXY: the shtick rly doesnt suit you its so obvious (p.6291)

so i don’t think everything jade says here should be taken to heart about her real feelings or how she would express them if she was being genuine as her normal self. we know jade can get mad but i think we’re giving her evil possession a little too much credit

that’s why i was personally disappointed in grimbark jade when homestuck was ongoing, is it felt like it didnt really give us anything? it was like empty calories while just waiting for the regular jade to come back which she never did. it is interesting to look at in retrospect to see if there’s anything there but…grimbark jade isn't exactly a reliable narrator. i guess none of them are but like, especially not grimbark jade. if i can’t separate what’s genuinely jade under this mess from what isn’t then what’s the point?

like for example this was left out of floral’s argument when showing this part, but in the comic grimbark jade tells dave that he’s “more messed up inside than davesprite” …. right after dave wouldnt comply with her demands to fight her and doesnt want to fight lord english. that’s…not really telling about anything at all for either of them. jade is evil and if things dont go the way she’s programmed to get them to go she’s gonna flip her lid. this is what i mean about her not being in her right mind

JADE: the fact is youre going to have to rely on those powers if you want to stand any chance against a lord of time JADE: it is safe to expect he can only be challenged by someone with a similar command over the aspect DAVE: why is that safe to expect DAVE: where are all these presumptions coming from DAVE: if you can use swords why dont you take the welsh cueball sword and fight him yourself DAVE: i bet you could fuck him up DAVE: youre probably even more extra strong now that youve succumbed to the bark side DAVE: did you ever think about that JADE: dave i am perfectly aware of the awesome powers granted to me by the bark side JADE: it does not matter JADE: i cant be the one to wield your sword against english JADE: it has to be you JADE: it is the will of the empress, and thats final DAVE: the empress can suck it DAVE: i have no intention of fighting him DAVE: and this isnt even me pulling more lame self aware reluctant hero junk DAVE: i am just straight up not going to do it DAVE: see thats not reluctance its just petulant refusal on my part DAVE: reluctant hero shit is when the guys like aw shucks i dunno if i wanna but deep down we all know he really does DAVE: but i really dont DAVE: why should i DAVE: i dont give a damn about lord english or his nebulous atrocities out in nowherespace DAVE: what kind of villain is someone you never met who hardly did anything evil to you or your friends directly DAVE: or even to anyone in your universe for that matter other than through some vague insidious influence DAVE: who even is this guy and why should i hate him DAVE: am i really supposed to be pissed off at a green muscle monster i never met DAVE: cause i aint pissed off at no muscle monster DAVE: hell wasnt he in some ass backwards way responsible for us existing in the first place? DAVE: or all of humanity for that matter?? DAVE: maybe i should thank him before chopping him up via welshscalibur JADE: jeez you sure have some issues JADE: honestly it has become very tiresome listening to this sort of thing JADE: i thought davesprite had problems JADE: his issues i could kind of understand JADE: i thought you might be different, being the alpha dave and all JADE: but no JADE: you might be even more messed up inside than he was! DAVE: what DAVE: why are you dragging that guy into this (p.6385 / 6386)

part 2

#homestuck #homestuck meta #dave strider #jade harley #davejade #davesprite #hs #homestuck analysis

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theprodigalpragmatist · 7 months

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Fic Tag Chain

Rules: List the first line of your last 10 (posted) fics and see if there's a pattern! (thank you to @roxannepolice for the tag!!!)

"Six dogs. One Will Graham." ~ old mr graham had troubles of his own (will graham + dogs + cat + L + ratio)

"At first there’s sound—noise, really—it grates and grates and is that panting he hears?" ~ you reap what you sow (uhhh...tensimm identity crisis with a twist, we'll go with)

“Kneel.” ~ cut mouth bleeding razors (tensimm smut, with its own twist, even...)

"The issue isn’t that the Doctor is old, though he is…unpleasant to look at, the Master can admit that." ~ hand in unlovable hand in unlovable hand (simm master + simm master + ten + the most rancid selfcest vibes in eternity)

"They used to play a game when they were children, a long, long time ago." ~ a martyrdom, a kingdom that will never come (part ii of a gallifreyan funerary ritual fic w/ @koscheiisms, tensimm edition)

"Borusa was the one who found them." the purest lick of fire (part i of the gallifreyan funerary ritual fic, academy era thoschei, torvic rock murder ft. borusa pov)

"He stumbles, helpless as a newborn woprat, and sometimes not being bad is like being good, so she watches him meet the ground of his own accord without throwing herself into the mix." ~ and i find you with a thimble weeping (tenmissy <3 beloved tenmissy <3)

"He opens his eyes to darkness, to a staunch nothingness that grates in its totality." Clawing for the Stars (sam tyler whump) (edit: currently hidden because of bot targeting 😔)

"Crawly adjusted the tails of their blouse around their embroidered girdle, the shirt spread wide and exposing the smooth planes of their chest." As time began unwinding, I'd be yours alone (aziracrow through the ages + music)

"The knife glints in the peek between shadows—sharp, wicked, honed to a point and chipped towards the hilt." i'm only what you wanted for a little while (installment from ongoing series informally known as 'saxteen kissies')

WOW okay i am terrible at analysis...however, fascinated by the recent trend of launching into the thick of it...in my head, most of my fics start with a heavy lead-up, this is really great insight! and was a blast to do, so thank you again @roxannepolice!

tagging @lohengreen @harrowq @koscheiisms @incorrectquotesconaisseur @thesecondbeatitude (fully sure i've double tagged people but soo la voo, as the kids say) (please join in if not tagged if you'd like!)

#hannibal #tensimm #thoschei #tenmissy #life on mars #good omens #saxteen #prodigalpragmafic #i really need to change that tag

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secretmellowblog · 2 years

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I noticed a bunch of new people in the Les Mis tag because of @lesmisletters, so I thought I’d share my Les Mis Blog recommendation list! If you’re looking for Les Mis blogs to follow, here are some people I recommend checking out! : D

Because Les Mis Letters is a readalong of the Brick I’m going to keep my recommendations to “currently active Les Mis blogs who focus on posting primarily canon era Brick-related things, are participating in the readalong in Some way, and post a lot of meta or academic analysis or information about historical context/political context/artistic movements relevant to Les Mis.” if I were to include every Les mis blog I enjoy this post would be 200 miles long XD.

1. @pilferingapples is basically the pillar of the Les Mis fandom on tumblr! They’ve been here for a decade and have an extremely organized blog that basically feels like an archive of the entire fandom- including everything from meta on all the different characters, information about lesser known adaptations like the anime Shoujo Cosette, and discussions about the historical context around the novel/French Romanticism/Victor Hugo’s life. I definitely recommend looking through the tags in their pinned post ajdjdjd. They are also just Very Nice.

2. @everyonewasabird is a Brick-Club member who has already done exhaustive chapter by chapter analyses of the entire book, and writes amazing intensely researched fanfiction. They are also very nice! (Just assume everyone on this list is nice)

3. @fremedon also has tons of exhaustive analysis/meta, and also writes great funny intensely researched fanfic that captures Hugo’s writing voice extremely well.

4. @bobcatmoran posts a lot of great things, but i especially love their recent posts about the Arai Manga and its translations!

5. @vapaus-ystavyys-tasaarvo has been posting tons of great historical context/footnotes lately—- and they’re also the number one source of Les-Mis-related maps!! So many high quality maps

6. @psalm22-6 posts translations of old 19th century reviews of Les Mis, as well as vintage advertisements and other weird ephemera. It’s very fun and often deeply cursed stuff.

7. @thevagueambition also does a lot of historical research (especially into things like queer history) and writes really great intensely researched Grantaire fic!

8. @persefoneshalott does a lot of great translations of Spanish adaptations of Les Mis, and has recently been posting about what things were removed in censored editions of the novel.

9. @alicedrawslesmis is a great Les Mis art blog that also dives into jokes/analysis too!

10. @shitpostingfromthebarricade posts a lot of brick-focused stuff, and does a lot of clever clever and thoughtful modernizations (ex. Retelling an entire chapter with nearly the exact wording Hugo uses, but changing the setting/historical references to modern day ones)

11. @ueinra posts illustrations from old editions of Les Mis across the world and screenshots of/ information about obscure adaptations. :3

I might add more later because I know I’m missing people, but these are just the first currently active brick-focused somewhat research-heavy blogs that came to my head! :D

#Les mis #les mis letters #and I hope no one is insulted by the way I described their blogs ? 😂#But YEEE there are so many more blogs I could add #like there are people whose stuff I love but #who don’t primarily post Les mis right now #including some of my fandom friends ….#anyway I recommend following Everyone but this is just my non exhaustive top-of-my-head list #obviously there’s also pureanon and byjuxtaposition #and badlesmisimagines #and etc etc #but yeah i spent too long on this XD

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themadknightuniverse · 1 year

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Nacho Varga's outfit analysis and symbolism

Okay uh I just saw a gif set of the scene where Nacho gets rescued by the twins, and I had a revelation but I have no idea if this has been pointed out before. I gave myself like 1 hour of research through tags to see if it was and I didn't find anything. But if it has been, sorry! Anyway here is another very long post about BCS because I have no self control anymore.

! TW blood and heavy spoilers !

So the thing is after all that time spent looking for Nacho and Lalo's outfits yesterday combined to the gif set, I just got hit by the fact that in the scene he's shot and found by the cousins, Nacho is wearing the same kind of shirt as in the very first time we see him.

I even thought at first it was the same shirt, but they are different. And it's a very interesting choice to make considering the scene. It would have been awesome if it was the exact same shirt. Why? Because Nacho gets badly hurt in this scene, right after being caught up by all his choices. He takes a bullet in the shoulder and in the side, which can be compared to many christian representations. @seraphtrevs already did a splendid analysis of Nacho being a Christlike figure, so I wont be too long on that parallel, you can check out her post about it here . So here Nacho is left to die in the desert, covered in blood, and between all the blood and the shirt pattern itself he looks like he's been torn apart by hell hounds and he just came back from the Purgatory. He's caught up by his actions, his choices, he's suffering for it.

It even goes further than just him being badly hurt in this outfit tho. The shirt even gets shredded by the hands of the cousins, the previous version of himself symbolically destroyed by the hands of a Salamanca. And when Leonel removes it with the help of the vet, it even looks hard to get rid of it, like the second skin of a snake if I push the comparison to an extreme.

And of course we have Marco giving him the Salamanca blood afterward, which is still an insane thing in terms of symbolism, I can't believe it happened. It's just plain "you've been torn apart, stripped of a part of you, and now we fill the emptiness of it with a part of us". Wild.

But still, why is it so interesting that Nacho has the same kind of outfit? Because this exact scene happens when his traitorous side is revealed to one of the character that has a lot of power, Fring, and he's now to serve as a double agent. And so, putting him in a look alike outfit from the first apparence tells us that the Nacho we knew before has been killed. There is no way back. There is no healing from this. It's a permanent change. A permanent consequence to his actions. And after all this, Nacho's desire for power and money starts to disappear (and he's been going down this road for a while once his dad is threatened, but this whole situation seals it I believe). So Nacho doesn't wear the exact same shirt. It would have been great for the blatant symbolism of it all, BUT the fact that it's slightly different gives us the opportunity to actually see something more. We have 3 scenes with Nacho that happens in the desert and that kind of echoes each other with their similarities (multiple people gathered, all there to solve a problem, and there is at least one Salamanca in each one). And if we take a look at his outfits in the 3 scenes, that's where it becomes even more interesting than just the first comparison. So let's take a look at the 3 outfits during those 3 key scenes.

We have the first scene we meet Nacho. The pattern is blotchy, black and white (or maybe blue/green/grey something like that, it depends of the light). It's messy, a bit wild looking. It fits Nacho's personality at the beginning of the series. He's got more wit to him, he makes reckless decisions/have reckless ideas (Selling his own stuff on a cartel territory with the pills, terrible planning of a robbery, plotting Tuco's death, hiding his illegal activities to his dad, planning Hector's death, etc) Also black and white suits his personality and his double agent role pretty well. Nacho is stubborn, he has a strong personality. The heavy contrast of black and white fits the way he's capable to strike with his words as well as his fists. He's a sharp thing. He's also in a grey place when it comes to morals, like most of the characters in the show.

Then we have the scene where he's shot and found by the cousins. Like we said we still have a shirt that have some similarities with the first one. It's still a heavy black and white pattern, blotchy, it's irregular BUT there is more structure to it already. We can discern horizontal and vertical lines creating something like a grid pattern. Compared to the first shirt we could assume it represent his change of direction in life. At this moment he got scared of Hector killing his dad, so he acted to get rid of this menace. Nacho isn't looking for more money and power. He's trying to survive and keep his dad safe. He can't be as reckless as before, he has to think things through. So, more planification for survival, more restrain, more care into what he does.

But then, we get to his last scene. The pattern isn't blotchy at all anymore. Still black and white. We have the horizontal and vertical lines still present from the precedent shirt, and of course they look like crosses. But there is still a bit of wildness/irregularity to this pattern, with the way the lines doesn't all connect, it isn't just crosses all over it. Nacho has drastically changed. He's still himself deep down, but there is all the things that changed in him too. At this point he went through everything, and finds himself in a dead-end. He's been obeying orders but also staying alert to not fall into another manipulation, he's more sharp than ever in his perception, still playing his last cards thoughtfully. He's been stripped of so much, all his hopes for a new life, no more desire for power and money at all, he's even sick of all this cartel thing. There is almost no more wildness to him, he was forced to become more calculating and cold in order to survive and protect. And his last moments are spent to surviving long enough to make sure his dad will be safe, to punish the Salamanca once more by revealing what he did to Hector (and there we can see his wild side exploding, it's raw but controlled), and keeping the choice to take his own life instead of letting others have that power over him.

To me, these 3 shirts, using them for desert scenes, it just screams morphing patterns, and so his mind morphing too.

#I could speak about him for hours #if you couldn't tell yet #nacho varga #bcs #better caul sall #analysis #nacho varga analysis #text post

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supergoopersworld · 1 year

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The DM saga: A retrospective

Dedicated to Duck. Thanks for requesting.

This wouldn’t be a Quinton Reviews blog if we didn’t at least mention the event that put him in the radar of many. It all started with one tweet:

Replying to herself Sarah would tweet this message came from a male YouTuber that would mention in video when she wasn’t replying to his messages.

Then Lindsay Ellis adds another six messages from the same guy.

Everyone suspects Quinton. Those are the components of this saga everybody knows.

Three years later, some people still say Quinton's involvement is merely a rumour and some even try to spin it as Quinton being the victim. Sounds familiar.

Here are some facts that only sickos knew about.

Sarah mentioned the original message was from a male YouTuber that mentioned in his videos when she didn't reply his messages.

youtube

At 56:35, Quinton mentions that he couldn't reach Sarah (who played Irma in a previous video reading Garfield strips).

Lindsay's reply contains three pairs of messages. Two of those pairs line up with times Quinton was in Anaheim.

July 2019: VidCon 2019. Quinton attends a panel held by Ellis, tags her in a tweet.

February 2020: Quinton goes on a trip to meet with friends and use his soon to expire Disney Land annual pass.

There were also attempts by forensic photo editing aficionados to prove it was Quinton.

If these tweets among others didn't pick up more traction at the time it was because the moment it became very obvious it wasn't MovieBob then people started to say it wasn't their place to speculate since the male YouTuber hadn't been named directly.

You can probably figure Quinton wasn't going to react directly, but in very Quinton fashion he had to make his feelings known.

But someone just so happened to notice and subtweet.

Quinton disappears of the Internet for a week, while most people either already know it was him or are doing mental gymnastics to say it suddenly doesn't matter.

It could have ended right there, but it didn't. Some context will be necessary. Quinton has two Discord servers: one of his Patreon (Quinton's Quarantine Quew), where all the parasocial talk comes from, and Quanto Analysis, from where he runs his channel with his friends and closest allies (until this controversy you only needed six dollars to enter). Someone leaked the latter in a html file for all the comments around the DM saga.

He would go to say other things like how the Mumkey Jones nontroversy prevented him from reaching 1M, mock Ellis by saying "stop me if I ever make a long video after I get cancelled", that he needs to suffer to make 'good art', complaining about his weight or expressing surprise when his channel broke the free fall it was in to make the way to the current state of his channel.

Now and then people accused Quinton of harassment and even labelled him worse things. None were true, he is just a cringelord that still acts like he is in high school. For that very reason, I took enough issue to write about the Flowergothic saga and revisit this one. Because I know Quinton incapable of being a creep, but he is one heavy prick who has bent the truth before and would do again.

#quinton reviews #quinton #sarah z #marysuewriter #lindsay ellis

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thedarkeyedcaptain · 5 months

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Just wanted to say, Oathbringer has some really heavy themes.

I absolutly love your blog and your thoughts, and I am so excited to see your interpretations of some of the events! I really respect you analysis!

That being said, there have been times where I have had to take a break during Oathbringer. I just wanted to say that if you have to take a break, return the book, and then come back to it later, that is okay! We will all still be here later!

Remember this project is for fun, not a responsibility, so as much as I loooooove your content, please remember not to feel pressured to process more than is comfortable. ❤️

(Oathbringer is an amazing book and I think you will really enjoy it, I dont mean to be intimidating, 55 hours of Oathbringer is just a lot for 2 weeks. I wanted to remind you that 2 weeks is an artificial deadline. You can take as long as you want.)

first of all this ask is so kind!!!! thank you a lot <3

I am also so glad that you like my interpretations and analysis ! (I mean, I do do it for fun, but it's always nice to get confirmation from people that have come farther than you yourself haha feeds a bit into my ego ngl XD )

It's actually been really interesting for myself too because at my first readthrough I didn't think that much about kaladin (since I was too busy kissing the floor shallan walks on lol), I mainly dismissed my mixed feelings towards him due to the reluctant hero archetype he embodies that I don't really like. it's only after the end of wor (that fucking moash scene 😭) that I went slightly feral for his arc. *slaps his left ass cheek* this bad boy can fit so many parallels.

now I can actually pinpoint *why* Kal is my least favorite pov character (cuz I'm afraid that hasn't changed lol)! which is cool. I was a bit nervous at first since my interpretation of him isn't necessarily the most charitable (especially considering this is literally a kaladin sideblog 💀) but I'm glad that people seem to agree or at least find it interesting <3 I really love it when people somehow engage with my analysis (tags, answers, asks, rbgs, etc, be it to agree or disagree) and I do try to always respond (though sometimes it takes a bit bcs i need to translate word vomit into sth actually coherent or I haven't really thought about it before)

I have also been told multiple times by now that I need to read row, which I am hyped about !! ^^

wow. okay. I feel like that went away from me for a bit. I apologize for that lol

the two weeks are actually because I'm listening to everything on Libby, and you can't really extend the stormlight books because they are so popular. with words of radiance for example (which I bought, bc for some reason that is the only book in the series that isn't available at my library??) I took about a month I think, so almost double that haha

but I thought it over and I'm probably gonna either make a free trial run at bookbeat or sth so I can listen to it with more calm or just straight up buy it as well. rushing through oathbringer specifically will probably be no good rip

I've actually recently discovered popcorn thrillers so I'm taking breaks from oathbringer by reading some relaxing *checks note* patricide and child kidnapping!

thank you again and I hope everyone reading this has a marvelous day <3

#this was actually great timing cuz i couldve used a lil pick me up abt rn haha <3 #speaking to the stormfather #out of character.

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onlycreatedtowriteoneessay · 1 year

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The Hypocritical Nature of Fandom Shipping

Pairings we should be concerned with in Teen Wolf

Please read this as I feel I have made some relatively important points

Disclaimer:

This is about the concerning age gaps and what people focus on, this is mostly regarding people who are Anti-Sterek.

This is primarily on AO3 because I couldn't be bothered to go on any other website when it is the prominent one people use.

I have made a separate blog in order to keep those who may send me hateful DMs and I don’t exactly want what could be hate mail in my personal DMs because I am arguably a fragile person, and I will absorb the hate until I need to seek a therapist.

I also come from England, where the age of consent laws differs from the State of California, in which it is legal for 16-year-olds to date anyone over 18, so long as they are not in a position of responsibility/authority – like a teacher or an officer[1].

I would also like to point out that I am not against any ship except ones with particular elements I am completely against, such as people who ship blood-related family members (Wincest) or age gaps larger than ten years. However I won't go after people for shipping them, I would block that content so I don't come across it.

If you are curious about the ships that are found in Teen Wolf you are free to follow this link to all the known pairings (platonic and romantic)[2]

EDIT - 14th April '23

I can't reply to comments as this is a side blog so

I realise I didn't talk about the predator and abuse of Isaac aspect, but that wasn't really the focus, I wrote this based on what I have seen on tumblr and twitter and even TikTok(?) and the only thing that really gets brought up is the age and how people who ship these fictional characters are "delusional", but thank you for adding to the discussion!!

Fanfiction is a transformative world. There are endless fandoms and pairings to write about such as those that focus on Formula 1[1] and Real Person Fics (RPFs)[2].

I hope to give a reasoned analysis on the pairings of Teen Wolf and the issues that I am aware of following the release of Teen Wolf: The Movie in January 2023.

This essay will focus on the hypocritical nature of shipping fictional characters with age gaps in Teen Wolf but will have a small comparison to other popular media. There will not be a heavy focus on age but rather than size of the gaps of these fictional characters.

TEEN WOLF'S ORIGINS AND AO3

Teen Wolf[1] originated in 1985s with Michael J. Fox starring as Scott Howard; the original production greenlit two sequels[2] leading MTV to adapt a modern version produced by Jeff Davis in 2011[3]. Teen Wolf has been met with a positive audience in the years of production with favourite seasons including season 3B and Season 5. The show continues to exhibit overwhelming popularity as the years go by as people rewatch it for nostalgia or because they wish to return to comfort episodes.

As with anything that exists, there are people who wish for their favourite characters to have an extended story or they do not agree with what the writers have decided is their fate, such as character death (Derek Hale in Teen Wolf: The Movie). Due to the disagreement viewers have with how their favourites end up, they will turn to fanfiction websites, specifically, in this decade, Archive Of Our Own (AO3)[4].

The AO3 tagging system is a complex aspect of the website but can be understood when the time is taken for people to find suitable fics relatively easily (when the fanfics are tagged properly of course). Tags often include spoilers regarding what is contained in the fanfic, typically “watersports”[5], “dub-con”/”dubious consent”[6], and “misunderstandings”[7]; but the tags could also include the author ‘talking’ to the reader which could include “no beta we die like [character]”[8].

THE STEREK SHIP AND THE POTENTIAL ISSUES

The Teen Wolf fandom contains popular ships such as, Sterek[1], Stydia[2], Stalia[3], Scallision[4], Liam Dunbar/Theo Raeken[5], Berica[6], just to name a few. A lot of pairings include Stiles Stilinski, most likely because Dylan O’Brien’s performance allows Stiles to have a chemistry with anyone he comes into contact with.

The pairing that contains the most fanfics is of course, Sterek; at the time of writing, Sterek contains 70,770 works which according to the last page of the date posted sort by began 26 June 2011[7]. Due to the popularity of the pairing, there is of course an exceptional amount of hate that comes with it, a lot of this hate can simply be found on Tumblr, known as Anti-Sterek(s)[8].

The chief problem that people who consider themselves to be Anti-Sterek have with the pairing is the age gap, Derek Hale is meant to be older than the rest of the main characters, however, it is unknown exactly how old he is meant to be due to the constant changing of his age (shown in the pilot screening presentation script where he was written to be nineteen[9]), but based on the events of that took place before the pilot episode, and for the purposes of this essay, it can be assumed he is around twenty-one to twenty-two at the beginning of the show[10].

Stiles Stilinski has obviously been written to be over sixteen years old, as he holds a valid licence. However, again, it is almost unknown when he turns seventeen due to the discrepancy in the timeline of events and almost contradictory statements made by the Teen Wolf calendar and the Teen Wolf Facebook page[11]; but it can be assumed Stiles turns seventeen during the events of Season 3 (3A and 3B). For the purposes of the writing, it can be assumed Stiles is sixteen during the pilot episode.

I am aware that shipping a sixteen-year-old with someone who is supposed to be (at the maximum) twenty-two is a large problem, however, if you consider reality, there are a lot of people who actively seek out relationships with people who are significantly older than them. When you contemplate actuality there are celebrities who have yet to face repercussions for dating people who are remarkably younger than them; Leonardo DiCaprio, and Sam Taylor-Johnson.

A factor that could be the reason that Sterek is scrutinized is due to the relationship that Kate Argent pursued with Derek when he was fifteen to sixteen. There is a lot of discourse on Tumblr and Twitter and even TikTok comments where fans equate the Sterek ship with that of what Kate did to Derek.

It is reasonable for viewers to abhor the relationship when based on these facts but, it should be remembered that a lot of fanfics involve alternative universes such as those of High School, and College where a lot of characters are specifically written to be the same age. I am not removing the reasoning behind the dislike of Sterek, I just want those who will take the time to read this analysis to realise that there are hypocritical aspects of shipping.

THE OTHER POTENTIALLY PROBLEMATIC SHIPS OF TEEN WOLF

It cannot be ignored that Sterek is not the only ship that has an age gap, there are viewers of the show who enjoy reading fanfics involving Steter (Peter Hale x Stiles Stilinski)[1]; this ship is also a problematic pairing due to the even larger age gap than that of Sterek’s, and this pairing on AO3 is considered to be the second most popular Teen Wolf ship with (at the time of writing) 10,766 works[2].

If you were to venture onto Tumblr and searched for the Anti-Steter[3] tag you would find less posts than the Anti-Sterek tag, and less frequent postings in general. Based on this, it would appear that there is more hate for Derek than Peter.

Another ship pairing that is more concerning, if fans of the show dislike large age gaps exceeding ten years, would be (Chris Argent x Stiles Stilinski) of which 866 fics are found on AO3[4], this is less than other ships but of course, still an interesting number of fics that have spanned 2012-2023.

The more popular ship containing Stiles and Chris is Stetopher which is a polyamorous ship that also comprises Peter. The works on AO3 are few in number, with only 739 published at the time of writing, these fics began being uploaded in September 2012[5].

This ship should again be scrutinised far more than that of Sterek because of the even larger age gap that exists. As aforementioned, it appears that Derek is greatly disliked due to the awareness of the Sterek ship.

Another ship that fans should be aware of is the Melissa McCall x Stiles Stilinski ship, of which there are 45 works on AO3, starting from November 2012 to 2023[6].

This ship is feasibly far more concerning considering Melissa is Stiles’ best friends’ mother, and undoubtedly this is the most unsettling pairing of all as Melissa would have watched Stiles grow up, and this would therefore be considered grooming.

In sum, the ships involving, Peter Hale, Chris Argent, and Melissa McCall should give rise to far more concern than that of Sterek. Again, this could mean that Derek’s character is far more hated, either because of Derek himself being written as something of an enemy in the first few seasons of the show airing, or because it’s easier to target pairings that are more popular than the other.

OTHER PAIRINGS THAT HAVE LARGE AGE GAPS BUT RECEIVE ALMOST NO HATE

The Vampire Diaries is also a popular show that aired from 2009 until 2017. The premise of the show is a seventeen-year-old Elena Gilbert falls in love with a one-hundred-and sixty-three-year-old. It is common lore that a vampire stops aging once they are turned, however, if people are concerned with age gaps of characters then there should be far more concern over the beloved shows.

Let’s not forget that popular fantasy books, such as that of A Court of Thorns and Roses and the Throne of Glass book series, also contain exceedingly large age gaps, it should not matter how old the characters are when they first meet, it should instead be about how many years apart they actually are. Yet, there is almost no hate found online regarding this aspect. When you compare this notion with that of Teen Wolf’s, there is a hypothetical question that could be raised, is the reason that Sterek is so hated down to it being popular, or is it because it is M/M pairing?

If an age gap is larger than ten years, that is when you should be concerned. I am not really concerned with age gaps in fiction being less than ten years, because it is fictional and I like the dynamic the pairing has, it is very rare that I read fanfics for any media but when I do, it is because I want more from these characters. If people in reality (where it is openly illegal to do so) are in relationships with large age gaps with someone underage, that is when you should troubled.

CONCLUSION

Teen Wolf is a popular show that generates a lot of discourse in the online community, it is probable that there is a heavy hypocritical nature to the pairings that people find. If people were truly concerned with age gaps exceeding two years, they would have more hatred for other ships in the show such as Marrish (Lydia x Parrish); however, it appears that Sterek is hated more due to how popular it is and could also be because Derek was written as a villain, especially in Season 2.

FURTHER POINTS

As stated in the disclaimer, I come from England and I write this with a different attitude, I am aware that the age of consent is eighteen in California, and it is illegal for anyone to leave the state with someone with the intention of having sexual relations. However, Teen Wolf is not real, and if you are getting exceedingly defensive and antagonistic around characters that other people ship and proceed to write long hateful messages to people anonymously on Tumblr to Sterek blogs and those who tag Anti-Sterek with claims that shipping Derek with Stiles is "pedophilic" in fact shows up the Sterek tag.

I expect that I could get hate for this, but I am not defending Sterek, I just hope I pointed out a few problems that I have found, I attempted to do extensive research, but I admit I would get more annoyed about the hypocrisy that I would have found.

I am not against people shipping whatever they want (look at the House of Dragons show) but I personally will not seek out ships that I don’t like and I don’t write hate because what’s the point? It’s not like it’s going to change anything, people enjoy what they enjoy. If you personally attack someone for who they ship, you are a terrible person. If you don’t like something, just block it so you don’t ever see it!!! IT IS THAT SIMPLE!!!

SOURCES

INTRODUCTION

[1] https://archiveofourown.org/tags/Formula%201%20RPF/works

[2] https://archiveofourown.org/media/Celebrities%20*a*%20Real%20People/fandoms

TEEN WOLF'S ORIGINS AND AO3

[1] https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0090142/

[2] https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0272412/;https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0094118/

[3] https://www.imdb.com/title/tt1567432/

[4] https://archiveofourown.org/

[5] https://archiveofourown.org/tags/Watersports/works

[6] https://archiveofourown.org/tags/Dubious%20Consent/works

[7] https://archiveofourown.org/tags/Misunderstandings/works

[8] https://archiveofourown.org/works/search?work_search%5Bquery%5D=no+beta+we+die+like

THE STEREK SHIP AND THE POTENTIAL ISSUES

[1] https://archiveofourown.org/works?commit=Sort+and+Filter&work_search%5Bsort_column%5D=created_at&include_work_search%5Brelationship_ids%5D%5B%5D=264659&work_search%5Bother_tag_names%5D=&work_search%5Bexcluded_tag_names%5D=&work_search%5Bcrossover%5D=&work_search%5Bcomplete%5D=&work_search%5Bwords_from%5D=&work_search%5Bwords_to%5D=&work_search%5Bdate_from%5D=&work_search%5Bdate_to%5D=&work_search%5Bquery%5D=&work_search%5Blanguage_id%5D=&tag_id=Teen+Wolf+%28TV%29

[2] https://archiveofourown.org/works?commit=Sort+and+Filter&work_search%5Bsort_column%5D=created_at&include_work_search%5Brelationship_ids%5D%5B%5D=301210&work_search%5Bother_tag_names%5D=&work_search%5Bexcluded_tag_names%5D=&work_search%5Bcrossover%5D=&work_search%5Bcomplete%5D=&work_search%5Bwords_from%5D=&work_search%5Bwords_to%5D=&work_search%5Bdate_from%5D=&work_search%5Bdate_to%5D=&work_search%5Bquery%5D=&work_search%5Blanguage_id%5D=&tag_id=Teen+Wolf+%28TV%29

[3] https://archiveofourown.org/works?commit=Sort+and+Filter&work_search%5Bsort_column%5D=created_at&work_search%5Bother_tag_names%5D=Stiles+Stilinski%2FMalia+Tate&work_search%5Bexcluded_tag_names%5D=&work_search%5Bcrossover%5D=&work_search%5Bcomplete%5D=&work_search%5Bwords_from%5D=&work_search%5Bwords_to%5D=&work_search%5Bdate_from%5D=&work_search%5Bdate_to%5D=&work_search%5Bquery%5D=&work_search%5Blanguage_id%5D=&tag_id=Teen+Wolf+%28TV%29

[4] https://archiveofourown.org/works?commit=Sort+and+Filter&work_search%5Bsort_column%5D=created_at&include_work_search%5Brelationship_ids%5D%5B%5D=280222&work_search%5Bother_tag_names%5D=&work_search%5Bexcluded_tag_names%5D=&work_search%5Bcrossover%5D=&work_search%5Bcomplete%5D=&work_search%5Bwords_from%5D=&work_search%5Bwords_to%5D=&work_search%5Bdate_from%5D=&work_search%5Bdate_to%5D=&work_search%5Bquery%5D=&work_search%5Blanguage_id%5D=&tag_id=Teen+Wolf+%28TV%29

[5] https://archiveofourown.org/works?commit=Sort+and+Filter&work_search%5Bsort_column%5D=created_at&work_search%5Bother_tag_names%5D=Liam+Dunbar%2FTheo+Raeken&work_search%5Bexcluded_tag_names%5D=&work_search%5Bcrossover%5D=&work_search%5Bcomplete%5D=&work_search%5Bwords_from%5D=&work_search%5Bwords_to%5D=&work_search%5Bdate_from%5D=&work_search%5Bdate_to%5D=&work_search%5Bquery%5D=&work_search%5Blanguage_id%5D=&tag_id=Teen+Wolf+%28TV%29

[6] https://archiveofourown.org/works?commit=Sort+and+Filter&work_search%5Bsort_column%5D=created_at&include_work_search%5Brelationship_ids%5D%5B%5D=280222&work_search%5Bother_tag_names%5D=&work_search%5Bexcluded_tag_names%5D=&work_search%5Bcrossover%5D=&work_search%5Bcomplete%5D=&work_search%5Bwords_from%5D=&work_search%5Bwords_to%5D=&work_search%5Bdate_from%5D=&work_search%5Bdate_to%5D=&work_search%5Bquery%5D=&work_search%5Blanguage_id%5D=&tag_id=Teen+Wolf+%28TV%29

[7] https://archiveofourown.org/tags/Teen%20Wolf%20(TV)/works?commit=Sort+and+Filter&include_work_search%5Brelationship_ids%5D%5B%5D=264659&page=3539&work_search%5Bcomplete%5D=&work_search%5Bcrossover%5D=&work_search%5Bdate_from%5D=&work_search%5Bdate_to%5D=&work_search%5Bexcluded_tag_names%5D=&work_search%5Blanguage_id%5D=&work_search%5Bother_tag_names%5D=&work_search%5Bquery%5D=&work_search%5Bsort_column%5D=created_at&work_search%5Bwords_from%5D=&work_search%5Bwords_to%5D=

[8] https://www.tumblr.com/tagged/anti%20sterek?sort=recent

[9] http://www.zen134237.zen.co.uk/Teen_Wolf_1x01_-_Pilot.pdf p. 17

[10] https://www.seventeen.com/celebrity/movies-tv/a42596259/teen-wolf-the-movie-cast-ages/

[11] https://www.tumblr.com/cupidsbower/112807545186/how-old-are-the-other-characters-then-stiles

[12] https://www.google.com/search?gs_ssp=eJzj4tDP1TdIKctNMWD0EsxJzc9LLErJV0jJTE4sKMrMBwCL2QoE&q=leonardo+dicaprio&oq=leona&aqs=chrome.1.69i57j46i433i512j46i131i199i340i433i465i512j46i131i340i433i512l2j0i20i263i512j0i433i512j69i60.2189j0j9&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8

[13] https://www.google.com/search?sxsrf=APwXEddzeFoS5DHyEmaO4XJhSdWXbqHpqQ:1681421852321&q=Sam+Taylor-Johnson&si=AMnBZoEofOODruSEFWFjdccePwMH96ZlZt3bOiKSR9t4pqlu2IBZAUCsyQgyLwj0MoQ908Yd_5yfBFTQnKmrTdOBY_oGZMx_iDGadZ7BTbaX1BRN2xJ09_hJbT1ar31kHk-6dwqLOBGvzEIYoQZLvnmd_LzjzLjljhUzrWuM6alU8XkV8NtcXQ5mteAHnosD10Mit8AZSn-qBTOut8iiP9hjTojm_q-T_A%3D%3D&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwiInubB6Kf-AhWabcAKHSraDxQQmxMoAHoECB8QAg&biw=803&bih=690&dpr=2

THE OTHER POTENTIALLY PROBLEMATIC SHIPS OF TEEN WOLF

[1] https://archiveofourown.org/works?commit=Sort+and+Filter&work_search%5Bsort_column%5D=created_at&include_work_search%5Brelationship_ids%5D%5B%5D=297569&work_search%5Bother_tag_names%5D=&work_search%5Bexcluded_tag_names%5D=&work_search%5Bcrossover%5D=&work_search%5Bcomplete%5D=&work_search%5Bwords_from%5D=&work_search%5Bwords_to%5D=&work_search%5Bdate_from%5D=&work_search%5Bdate_to%5D=&work_search%5Bquery%5D=&work_search%5Blanguage_id%5D=&tag_id=Teen+Wolf+%28TV%29

[2] https://archiveofourown.org/tags/Teen%20Wolf%20(TV)/works?commit=Sort+and+Filter&include_work_search%5Brelationship_ids%5D%5B%5D=297569&page=539&work_search%5Bcomplete%5D=&work_search%5Bcrossover%5D=&work_search%5Bdate_from%5D=&work_search%5Bdate_to%5D=&work_search%5Bexcluded_tag_names%5D=&work_search%5Blanguage_id%5D=&work_search%5Bother_tag_names%5D=&work_search%5Bquery%5D=&work_search%5Bsort_column%5D=created_at&work_search%5Bwords_from%5D=&work_search%5Bwords_to%5D=

[3] https://www.tumblr.com/tagged/anti%20steter?sort=recent

[4] https://archiveofourown.org/tags/Teen%20Wolf%20(TV)/works?commit=Sort+and+Filter&page=44&work_search%5Bcomplete%5D=&work_search%5Bcrossover%5D=&work_search%5Bdate_from%5D=&work_search%5Bdate_to%5D=&work_search%5Bexcluded_tag_names%5D=&work_search%5Blanguage_id%5D=&work_search%5Bother_tag_names%5D=Chris+Argent%2FStiles+Stilinski&work_search%5Bquery%5D=&work_search%5Bsort_column%5D=created_at&work_search%5Bwords_from%5D=&work_search%5Bwords_to%5D=

[5] https://archiveofourown.org/tags/Chris%20Argent*s*Peter%20Hale*s*Stiles%20Stilinski/works?page=37

[6] https://archiveofourown.org/tags/Teen%20Wolf%20(TV)/works?commit=Sort+and+Filter&page=3&work_search%5Bcomplete%5D=&work_search%5Bcrossover%5D=&work_search%5Bdate_from%5D=&work_search%5Bdate_to%5D=&work_search%5Bexcluded_tag_names%5D=&work_search%5Blanguage_id%5D=&work_search%5Bother_tag_names%5D=Melissa+McCall%2FStiles+Stilinski&work_search%5Bquery%5D=&work_search%5Bsort_column%5D=created_at&work_search%5Bwords_from%5D=&work_search%5Bwords_to%5D=

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