#that includes personality improvements
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You know what’s funny, like if a man loses a good woman , he doesn’t really have to go to hell and back to find another. Finding a good man? That’s a whole blockbuster adventure/thriller with a horror twist
#and personally it’s why I stop playing Barbra the builder cuz girl you’re just building him up for the next#get him to pay for some stuff and leave when ya ready 🧍🏾♀️#and when I say don’t build him: I mean in any context!#that includes personality improvements#education#especially money#philosophy#like if that’s not your husband what is the point#there’s like nuance to this but um yeah I stand on leaving him where you left him for the most part
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i don’t talk about bridgerton on here but just to clarify. i will not be having ANY eloise hate on this account. i will bite.
#eloise bridgerton they could never make me hate you!!#addressing the normal talking points one by one to get them sorted:#- no i don’t care that eloise called pen some names after the discovery. she was devastated and furious.#she can apologise in the future but in the moment of course she said it#- yes pen did write about eloise as a way to save her but that doesn’t mean it hasn’t possibly ruined eloise’s life#- similarly: eloise isn’t (just) angry that she was written about. daphne also went through whistledown and it very much terrified her#so have many other women including marina#- eloise is betrayed because she told pen everything and is realising pen told her nothing#(and she’s probably thinking about any secrets she might have said to her best friend that could now be used against the ton and her family)#- as claudio said: being regency gossip girl isnt a moral girlboss thing its deeply harmful tbh#- pen did have reasons to become whistledown! that doesn’t mean that she’s innocent or right!#- eloise isnt now friends with cressida to spite pen lmao she’s alone and scared and cressida was the last person who offered her friendship#she has no idea how to manage society by herself#(and she needs someone to improve the reputation of her and her family)#- im also convinced she has other ulterior motives for befriending cressida. like she’s keeping an eye on her or smth#- eloise didn’t just ignore anything pen said and that’s why she only just figured it out. pen deliberately didn’t speak like lw to hide it#the moment she did eloise was like huh that’s weird she doesn’t normally talk like that. and THATS when she figured it out#- eloise just found out her best friend has betrayed her and been hiding this massive secret#but she hasn’t told anyone. not even her own family. im not hearing out any accusations of HER of being disloyal#- also pen clearly wasn’t that upset at writing about eloise bc the moment eloise and colin upset her she went straight back to it lmao#side note but no i don’t think the queen is going to name her the ‘emerald’ or anything because she’s suddenly in the spotlight#eloise is tbh the only debutante she actually consistently recognised (for good or bad)#a new dress is not going to be interesting for charlotte to change her whole tradition#tl;dr i love eloise and i will die on this hill#eloise bridgerton#bridgerton
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baby's first binder ♡
#low stakes 🦇#my comics#this is pre-vampire mort of course#also i felt the same when i got mine like. suddenly everything seemed wearable again. including the tight stuff i never wore. wild#and my posture genuinely improves. but yes.#it's very based on my personal experience lol
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tomgreg is about the fantasy of being able to find someone who genuinely likes that you're mean and in fact thrives very well being needed in the particular kind of fucked up way that you need someone which makes it so you don't actually have to work that much to strip away your superiority complex in order to be loved for who you are
#mine#tomgreg#like wait i can kind of very openly see you as an extension of myself and you LIKE it? jackpot#(slash pos obviously there's a lot of nuance here and tom is very selfless underneath it all)#anyway genuinely tho i do feel like a bit of their thesis is very purposefully lacking the notion of self-improvement#like tom def does work to change the parts of himself that harm greg - WHEN he learns that they do#but there's a certain like. ok maybe it's just me and my personal revelations#in any case those revelations are that it's NOT necessarily the goal for every person and every relationship to be any particular#idea of 'healthy'#like yeah sure MAYBE if greg went to therapy and if he really WANTED to he could become someone who didn't tolerate#the way that tom as a closeted man is only able to express affection#but like... if he CAN tolerate it... if he's pathologically WIRED. even. to tolerate it#then is it really harmful?#if it's love and if both parties are willing and passionate is it REALLY bad? does it REALLY need to change?#maybe the diversity of the human condition simply includes#that what's horrible for one man is ideal for another#and that includes the people you love. idk
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in my spreadsheet era
#i have the usual reading book tracker#but awhile back i also made a list of wi state parks that includes park highlights and notes#then i made a tracker for my progress on the ice age trail#and yesterday i added a cute page for the mammoth challenge#this year i also made two separate workbooks to track my physical book collection to note what is unread and where to get audiobooks#and to track my game collection noting games that are unstarted in-progress or complete and notes to spark interest for mood gaming#then there is the whole ass workbook i put together to better track everything going on for my two characters used in the magical readathon#after adding a new readathon and challenge sheet to my reading tracker#oh and i made a tracking sheet for my books read crochet blanket#i swear i'm missing at least one but that might just be the work spreadsheets i have improved or created#text#personal
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I have a big google doc thing where I keep track of media and stuff (putting everything in loosely ranked categories), which is mostly just for my own reference so I know what tv shows I've already seen before, etc. and I never really look back through it, typically just a quick "okay, watched two movie in the past 8 months, need to quickly slap them somewhere in the lists. okay. done. save document. exit". But today I was actually reading through some of the old notes and there are like... MULTIPLE places where my comment is basically "It would have been good if it were about elves" or "I wish there was a fantasy show made in this same style" or "It's well made, but I just keep thinking about how I would like it more if everyone was an elf or was in old 1700s costumes" or etc like...... lol.... Most biased media ranking system on earth blatantly made by someone with an extremely hyperspecific range of narrow interests. It'd be like if a food reviewer only had 5 foods they actually liked, so they'd just go to a pizza place and be like "eh, the pizza was okay, but I just think it would be better if it was cereal instead. :/ ...2 out of 10"
#Which.. I mean... I am allowed to be biased because literally it's just for my own personal reference (or occasionall#y to send to friends or something if we're discussing the topic) so like.. nowhere am I saying 'I am the god of perfect taste and these#rankings are objectively the absolute truth and everyone should have my same opinion' or anything#BUT still.. it's funny to me sometimes#'Succession would be 100x better if it had the same cast/character quirks and shaky camera style and#acting choices/weird dialogue and general concept etc. EXCEPT it takes place within an elven noble family or something#managing the family business and everyone is in fantasy costumes now'' like.....okay...... but it's NOT that way..soo... thats not the show#''I like the acting style/general tone of Fleabag but i don't care for any of the characters or any of the subject matter and I wish it was#set in the 1800s and had vampires and was about magic instead'' okay..... again... you are making up an entirely new show in that case lol#OR my other beloved typical complaint ''The concept is good but theres too much plot and action and not enough people just sitting#around doing nothing and exposition dumping world and character lore'' ''this needs more goofy sideplots and filler episodes''#''this Drama was too dramatic I think it should be more lighthearted & people need to sit around doing nothing just being weird more often'#''the Action Movie was ok except for the action scenes - which I skipped through all of- but I liked the costumes and worldbuilding'' etc.#ERM sorry your plot has too much plot. also elves have to be included somehow. bye#BUT SERIOUSLY!!!!!! I literally genuinely believe that any show I like (or even dislike) could ALWAYS be improved greatly by#putting people in fantasy or historical costume/setting/etc... why the FUNK would I want to see bland jeans and cars and cell phones#when I could see elaborate velvet cloaks and fantastical landscapes and interior design and innovative takes on historical or#magical technology or etc. etc. etc. I LIVE in the modern day. I see it all the time!!! BORING! stinky!! boo!!!#ANYWAY... another social divide for me.. People love to bond by discussing media. which is hard when I'm like#'I literally will not watch something at all unless it fits into one of these 10 extremely specific categories which are all i care about i#the entire world''.. I say this and yet I still dislike most fantasy or historical things I've watched lol. ok TWO main criteria then!!#it must 1. be in a different world or time period. 2. be goofy silly. Nothing ever has BOTH. It's always overly serious boring drama action#fantasy/history stuff OR it's comedic lighthearted but with modern day characters... WHY.. anguish and woe and so on..#ANYWAY jhjnk... at least I can make that divide. Some people seem to project their own personal preferences and get really emotionally#defensive if you say you didn't like something - as if the fact that they DO like it is some Objective Truth or something rather than just#opinion/preference based. I can still easily say ''this is well made/well written/acted/good in a technical sense/has a lot of#points of appeal that most people would be drawn to/etc'' and admit that it's a GOOD show probably. I just PERSONALLY think its#bad because my tastes are very narrow. Some things ARE actually made badly but. things are not bad INHERENTLY just bc they dont suit ME lol#Better to recognize/accept whats odd about you and be peacefully aware of it than just being mad at everyone all the time for not fully#agreeing with you even when you're the one with the Weird opinion in that case lol.. I am right though :3 but.. lol... still. i get it
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No crafting update today because I spent all my spoons checking out a local(ish) wildlife reservation/hiking place, which was awesome!
I could not explore the whole place, and it is very much "only wheelchair friendly if the person pushing my wheelchair is capable of holding my entire weight against a steep slope and immediately pushing the chair up another only partially paved steep slope", but I walked the whole time*! I got to hear wolves howling through the forest and it is a whole hell of a lot eerier to hear on a foggy day in a winter forest than it was the only other time I've heard it, which was a very bright sunny day in an amphitheater at a zoo where one wolf howled alone on stage. There were crows cawing and wolves howling and it was absolutely magnificent and suddenly a whole lot of things from various fantasy novels I read as a kid hit very different. Like, I get why hearing the wolves howl in the night would be alarming now!
*we did bring my rollator/transport chair in the car, and the backup plan was that my dad or my brother would go get it and push me back to the car if I needed help
#the person behind the yarn#there were other animals and educational stuff but dang those howling wolves were something else#what can I say I grew up in a city with like zero wildlife that was bigger than lizards#well okay there were crows and seagulls and pigeons but I lived so far into a city there weren't even coyotes!#when I got a little older I did move somewhere with more wildlife (including but not limited to coyotes) but no wolves#my physical stamina is absolutely terrible at the moment because of the anemia and POTS#but the meds I am on are working pretty well!#I mean. they don't make me able bodied but they mean that my heart rate might be elevated but my blood pressure is okay#like my heart rate might be in the 130s but I'm not going to pass out! which is a huuuuge improvement!#it was also good to find out that the rest of my muscles are absolutely fine with an hourish long walk across uneven terrain#like. my heart was not so cool with it but the rest of my body was fine! and that's cool!#uphill slopes are still my nemesis and today was not a good heart day so I had to take very small steps#like half the length of my foot at a time#but it was a bad heart day and I COULD walk up slopes!!!
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Current Hindu gods in fgo
Kama-vessel Sakura Matou
Parvati- vessel Sakura Matou
Durga- vessel Sakura Matou
Kali- vessel Sakura Matou
Ganesha- vessel Jinako Carigiri
Alakshmi- vessel Lakshmi Bai
All- vessel Arjuna Alter
(If you’re wondering why Vritra is not here, it’s because she isn’t a god but rather an Asura, which is more akin to a demon or demigod)
#love how 57% is Sakura and 71% isn’t even an Indian person. that is really cool and not at all annoying :)#and also the two that are Indian barely even represent their gods they’re just chilling. lmao#hahaha *attacks fgo with a rock*#I’ll get over it but man what a pain. how do you make over half a group one girl and not go ‘is this maybe not a good plan’#I stole this from a twitter post that included vritr which annoyed a lot of ppl bc she isn’t a god lmao#which is kind of sad bc she actually would improve the stats IF SHE QUALIFIED (she doesn’t)#my post
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The other thing I’ll say about dead boy detectives is that it does include one of those character archetypes that I enjoy (guy who’s a bit of a dick but only because he’s the narratives chew toy)
#FREE MY BOY#HE DOESNT DESERVE YHIS#it also includes ‘guy who uses positivity to cope with anger issues and the unending horror’#and ‘teen who wants to improve as a person after realizing she ducks’
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I AM SO GLAD I'M STILL ALIVE FOR ALL THIS
#personal#really thought the blob full of nothing but terror and grief stage was permanent for a while there#and i wasn't even suicidal anymore i thought i had just permanently borked my brain#no!!!!!!! it just needed time! and my body needed more health!!! and i needed more community again!#DON'T GIVE UP!!!!!!!! if you're seeing this and you're exhausted beyond your bones or being eaten alive by a black hole#please know that you don't need to have hope and you don't need to be gung ho about it to survive#just keep going through the slog and take any opportunity that seems vaguely better each time you can#and rest rest rest i guarantee you that you need unholy amounts of rest that you're not getting#and just hold on. just hold on. it might take years but god everyone was right it was worth it to stay and keep going a while longer#you can give up on life. just don't give up on yourself. you keep hold of yourself and don't let ANYONE convince you to let go including#your own brain. you are SO much cooler and braver and wilder and livelier than you think you are and you're only going to improve over time#i love you and i'm here if there's anything i can do for you#don't be afraid to change your mind and don't be afraid to demand your right to live#those are my two rules for life at this point besides the cardinal rule of 'everyone is suffering and traumatized so be as kind as possible#and watch what happens in a snowball effect around you'#i love you. i love you. i am so glad i am alive to love you.
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aro culture is being confused by the long long list of micro labels and trying to find like a master post for them
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#Anonymous#aro culture is#aro#aromantic#actually aro#actually aromantic#ask#mod phoenix#honestly like. there's always more microlabels#generally i'd say a decent resource is aromanticism.org#go to the resources stuff and look at their glossaries#they aren't perfect - they've improved on personal bias in definitions since they first started but there's always some#selection bias in what terms they feel are big enough to include#by necessity#but it's a good primer on the larger microlabels
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I really hate the criticism of the "hurt people hurt people" trope.
I feel like it's denying that cycles of abuse exist. It's denying that prolonged abuse can warp your perception of reality and morality. It denies that after enduring the idea that your pain doesn't matter for so long, it's so easy to internalize that pain itself doesn't matter, whether or not it is yours or someone else's. It denies entire generations of people claiming "My parents hit me as a kid and I turned out just fine!" when in fact they are not just fine. It denies that mental health services are insufficient throughout most of the world still, and a lot of people carrying trauma or mental illnesses caused by trauma are still undiagnosed.
If you went through abuse for literal decades and didn't come out the other end with an enraged monster in your heart that genuinely believed that if your pain didn't matter, then nobody's pain mattered, then count yourself fucking lucky.
Because a lot of people who hurt others are hurt themselves. It doesn't excuse their actions, but it's foolish to try to erase it.
And you know, maybe let's not try to erase the voices of people who worked very hard to overcome their own internal monsters grown from abuse, who decided they wanted to be better than how they were taught to exist.
#personal#hurt people hurt people#obviously I am NOT suggesting that being the victim of abuse absolves somebody of being an abuser#but I've seen this criticism come up for depictions of cycles of abuse in general#and like....#shut up#that is reality for SO MANY people#and everyone who has ever tried to IMPROVE THEMSELVES has had a lower point that they started from#which INCLUDES having treated people poorly
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#really really hate how thoughtless and oblivious i can be to my own bad behavior#ill know something is important or that a shouldn't do a particular thing#but over time and assumptions and small acts of carelessnes shit just....fades and accumulates and one day#i look up and ive done something very stupid and hurt someone else#and i didn't feel it happening#my mind will take things and hide them from me is what it feels like. ill know they're there but it fades into the background noise#i am hard on the things in my life including people and relationships. and i am always so vulnerable to my own fuckin lmfao inattentivenes#this is why i struggle so much with the idea of ever having an intimate partner or children. it doesn't matter how much i care.#eventually and inevitably i do damage.#and i know consciously that people make mistakes and all you can do is try to course correct and make it right. but it's better#not to hurt anyone in the first place and i really don't know if i will ever be capable of that.#trying to convince myself this kind of shit is growing pains but man. man. i can't stop being what i am and it really#really feels sometimes like i am just destined to break and neglect#but then that ''im broken'' thing feels like trying to dodge around taking responsibility and improving. and i should be better than that.#but god how tf are you supposed to stop dissociating from the reality of what you're doing when you're. dissociated.#all i can ever think to do is isolate#*sigh* guys i think i might need to graduate to therapy with a trauma specialist#or adjust my medication. god. im so tired.#why is it so gd hard to be a normal decent person. it doesn't seem hard but then
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Hi I was just wondering if you plan to reopen your shop sometime? :)
howdy!! yes, absolutely!! i'm so sorry for the delay oTL
i expect to reopen in early 2024 (´▽｀)💗
i'm aiming for the first week of jan, but i'm looking into switching platforms (from bigcartel to shopify), so i can't provide an exact date 😭 hopefully i'll have some new designs available too, though!! :D
thank you so much for your interest and patience!!
#cott.txt#asks#anon#i was really hoping to squeeze another round of shop-open-time in before 2024#but the october pre orders bested me#i am so IMMENSELY grateful to my fellow bg3 fans who like my designs!! i received an unprecedented number of pre orders THANK U SOOO MUCH#i'm currently working on shipping them out!!! they should all be sent by next friday >:3c#BUT i had to set up some new systems for myself to handle the increased qty + reduce the potential for mistakes on my end#so i wasn't able to reopen in nov after all :(#i'm going to work really hard to bring in new designs for next year though!!! and i'm really excited about maybe switching to shopify!!!!#i think it will improve the experience for customers as well as significantly reducing my workload managing inventory etc :D#ANYWAY hopefully super early january 🙏🙏#every design will be either in stock or available to pre order then -- including a range of charms i'm really proud of#that i can currently only offer in-person due to bigcartel's item variation limitations but will be available if i switch to shopify!!!!#YAYYY
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Good news, girlies.
It is now ending day one of catsitting for my friends, and I’m not (I repeat, I am not) dying in an allergy hell of my own making.
I did take medicine yesterday before I arrived and today as soon as I woke up, but it’s only active for ten hours, and it’s been more than that. My sinuses are perfectly unclogged. My eyes are clear. I am not sneezing.
#and there IS fur everywhere.#including all over my own person.#I did have allergy issues yesterday and today morning#but I think I can be cautiously optimistic.#apparently my cat allergy is like a fussy cat itself#it just needs time to understand no one is trying to murder me.#like a half hour ago I did get a flareup#but then I washed my face and it immediately improved#so I think I'll be fine as long as I remember to stop touching my damn face.
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Just had the idea of doing a Roxy askblog that's based on it being a secret blog she's not allowed to have and every so often if someone asks her something she just says stuff like "To the Fazspy reading this, I'm not the real Roxy." to try and throw the staff off her trail lmao
Will probably never make a blog like that, but it could be kinda funny. Maybe I bring the idea of an 'ask Roxy anything' game back where I draw the answers for it instead so it's not a whole ass blog dedicated to Roxy being a sneaky lil shit on the internet
#there's several reasons I probably won't do it but it's a fun spin on stuff#roxy exploring the closed off parts of the plex in first person lmao#taking pictures like 'look see? its right there!' and she's pointing at literally nothing because the camera doesn't see what her eyes see#could be funny!#but doing things is... I would say it's improving but not really#it's improving in a maybe it is maybe it isn't sort of way so who knows if I'll ever get to do it anyway#ANYWAY yeah I'll probs not do this. literally no one would interact with it#the people are bored of my plex history stuff anyway so like... yeah it's cool I know when something won't work#an askblog only works if it gets asks and uh yeah the amount of askblogs I've seen die off within a week here because of that is crazy#no thank you to that I think!#I'm not putting the effort into something like that just to have it die so fast#hi if you read this far go find an askblog and pester the shit out of them it's fun#I haven't seen any around for a while but I also can't view half of tumblr on my phone#so it's really fucking hard to see them even if I follow them :(#but yeah if there's any sb askblogs out there or anyone that wants to have a go at it tag me in a post.#I WILL show up to be silly in your inbox though I may not always remember the plot if there is one#again. I can't see half of tumblr on mobile and that includes blogs but I'll do my best man#askblogs are fun! they're goofy and chaotic!#highly recommend!! I haven't ran one in years but they were very fun!!#ANYWAY Roxy just making posts like 'Jerry. Sandy. I know what you two keep doing in the Gator Golf caravan. :)'#just name dropping random plex guests to be like 'I KNOW WHAT YOU ARE' for shits and giggles#'who are they?' 'oh just two morons that dont know I know Everything Ever. Don't worry about it.'#ya know?? fun! goofy shit! could be funny!#random pictures from inside the plex like 'lmao they think I cant see them' and its just a fucking wall like yeah I wonder why#maybe it's the fucking wall in the way who knows? it's a mystery sdfdsf#pop rox talks
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