#that's manipulation that's what ppl should be aware of

[cherrysnax]

was talking to my butch last night about feelings and self perception and it’s weird that ppl see me as kind. not nice, but kind

[badaziraphaletakes]

The autistic community in this fandom has repeatedly said that Aziraphale is extremely autistic coded. Maybe we should start listening. Let's go. *SIGHS*

There's so much I could talk about the critiques I see over this mostly pretty harmless scene, but I'll try to focus on the ableism here:

Aziraphale's playfulness is called "roleplaying" and "dismissive of Crowley's feelings" here. And I must say, as an autistic person, I find it offensive bc this is an extremely autistic coded moment where Aziraphale was unmasking in front of the only person he allows himself to do so and that usually implies he was inviting Crowley to do the same, he was most likely aware of Crowley's anxiety there and making himself vulnerable to him by unmasking, inviting him into his space and vice-versa. (I think calling his special interest, magic, "horrible" is also anti-autistic bias btw)

We never see Aziraphale acting like this with any other character besides Crowley, with whom he does this repeatedly. It's not a new situation. Crowley knows this, and he is used to this kind of behaviour from Aziraphale. And he loves to complain about it btw, and Aziraphale indulges him on that. This is love. This is intimacy.

I know it isn't perfect, I know it lacks verbal communication, but this isn't abusive behaviour in the slightest. Better communication is something they both need to work on after 6k years of having to hide their feelings bc they were being persecuted and abused, the story is telling us this. We have a whole other season for that, the story isn't over.

Now, regarding the second paragraph, the plot made it painfully obvious that the clue was real, so Aziraphale was not going to Edinburgh for fun. He had to go, and Crowley knew it (he never even argued against it), bc of the mystery of Gabriel's situation thay could backfire on them in the future. Who knows what Heaven was doing to their angels (and what they could do to aziracrow!! That's why Crowley had an informant. Didn't Metatron prove this in the end, that the threat was real?). Sure, Aziraphale had fun, bc he was bonding with Crowley through the Bentley and he loves him, so that makes him happy, but that's it. We're allowed to make the most out of a bad situation, guys. It's also a way to deal with stress. Aziraphale and Crowley have different ways of dealing with stress, and both are valid, they're different people, it's normal that they react differently to a crisis.

This scene was a very married moment tbh, filled with comfort with you partner (enough to unmask), an old known and comfortable dance for the both of them, and even an invite to take a step forward in their relationship.

Food for thought: I've been wondering why the fandom likes to say Azi and Crowley are like a "married couple" but some ppl at the same time hate when they in fact act like one?

And finally, again, this is such an autistic coded moment that I, an autistic person, had the exact same interpretation as Aziraphale. I had never noticed, until I read this take, that Crowley could've meant anything other than "you don't know how to drive" lol. Aziraphale was being himself here. His true confident unmasked self. Bc Crowley allows him that. Bc Crowley makes him feel like he can. He wasn't pretending or intentionally misinterpreting or manipulating anyone. Assuming the absolute worst of him bc he interpreted something in a literal way is anti-autistic bias. Assuming the worst of him bc he doesn't use the same code as you to communicate is ableism. Assuming his decision-making logic is invalid bc of the way he acts when unmasking is both.

[gold-rhine]

genshin characters ranked on how hard it would be to get them to get in the robot and fight alien horrors or whatever they fight in nge

scara would get in the robot enthusiastically and you will need to forcefully get him out of the robot. he's still crying the whole time tho

diluc would get in the robot if after he got out his dad told him he's done good and ppl treated him like a hero

jean and ganyu would have robot overtime and collapse from exhaustion

alhaitham would not get in the robot in any circumstances. in fact, he has powerpoint presentation on why getting kids in the robots is inefficient war strategy and he's instigating a coup to replace the head pro-robot mad scientist

kaveh would tell alhaitham he's a horrible person for refusing and should shut up and get in the robot. he himself would get in the robot to prove his moral superiority and have a breakdown after

kaeya would get in the robot and pretend he's fine, while suffering internally and also realizing he's being exploited

childe would get in the robot willingly, but he would be distracted by wanton destruction and not actually achieve mission goals

furina already canonically was getting in the robot for 500 years

clorinde would get in the robot without complaints

navia would not get in the robot and would be organizing protest groups to get kids out of the robots

rizzley would get in the robot and be very casual about it, hed be like yeah, being in the robot is torture, but its not that bad relatively to what ppl being killed by the aliens are experiencing and someone has to do something. also, this is a rare situation if you make neuvi the alien angel horror, you can get them somewhere close to enemies to lovers

xiao has been living in the robot for last thousand years

yae miko would be the one gaslighting and manipulating kids to get in the robot

kujou sara is one of the kids yae miko personally sent in the robot when she had nothing to do with the robot to begin with

kazuha would not get in the robot. if he was forced to interact with the robot by like blackmailing him, thn after a day with kazuha, robot would get self-awareness and self-destruct to atone for being kids-torturing war-machine

[yellowymellon]

I can see why some people don't want Sunday to join the SH because it might hurt him more or they simply don't like already established factions to have new characters, but some of the other arguments like joining the SH will destroy the character Sunday built in the main story just sounds like ppl putting him on a pedestal (some even start to hate HIM for this theory??) so I think this should be repeated :

Sunday didn’t build any character and that's the tragedy of his story. He tried to convince us of his side but didn’t hear much of ours, the AE was even impressed by his plan but instead of counter arguing with some solid arguments they went on the defense and most of all tried to honor the watchmaker's wish and will. The first time we debated with Sunday was a complete failure, he didn’t see our point and wasn’t convinced. The second time was when we fought, he told us that to prove that our ideal is better and that his is wrong we must defeat him. Notice how he isnt even trying to listen to our side? Sunday has been caged and brainwashed by the dreammaster to believe the order is right for a really long time that he doesn’t believe in any other salvation. He's hopeless, for him this is the only way out and cannot see anything else. When TB answers his question at the very end, he is taken aback, when he falls down he is motionless, in the new LC he despairs, only once he remembers Elio's deal that hope returns to him. Sunday didn’t learn anything, the confrontation was a failure, he didn’t stand up on his own nor did he come to any realization. Therefore joining the SH isnt going to 'destroy' his character. It might save him, depending on what Elio is truly like.

Secondly, I think we're all aware of the family's hypocrisy. We've seen it in like all the penacony quests, a lot of messed up underhanded things, heinous crimes that caused a lot of suffering, and who else sits at the top as the coordinator of all the families?  it's evident that he was aware of everything and chose to be a bystander, or simply didn’t have control over any situation despite being the oak's head.

 He never hesitated against aventurine once he deemed him evil, He was also implied to convey the order from the dreammaster to the executor of dewlight pavilion to eliminate his traitor family. That is to say, not only does he have a vague idea about what he's doing, not only is he disconnected from ppl but he has no control whatsoever to change anything. Im not saying he is evil, his beliefs were impacted so much that now he has a distorted sense of - most importantly - justice. He truly believes he's righteous, he's stubborn and narrow minded and it's hard keeping his emotions in control, thus can be perfectly manipulated by someone better at mind games, Elio. That is if he wants to.

Sunday is deeply compassionate and far too selfless but he won't hesitate against what he deems wrong, evil or unjust. Because he has to be the strong.

I mean SW is in the same morally ambiguous state as Sunday, both do not harm directly (supposedly) but are bystanders, firefly only kills the irredeemable evil and Sunday didn’t have any prejudice against her. Kafka is the most cruel and blade does what he's told. But if Sunday is made to believe what he's doing is right and shares the same position as firefly I think it works. It also depends on Elio, yes he can manipulate him and it's just the same fate as before but there's an off chance that Elio will genuinely help Sunday find his path. I mean even if he doesn't Elio doesn’t seem like he tricked anyone without fulfilling his end of the deal.

I trust that hoyo aren't screwing around. Sunday still has his harmony powers, not sure how elio will use the brain melt and the truth serum but maybe Sunday's near ascension grants him extra powers? Elio is aware that Sunday failed to turn to an aeon. Some say that Sunday might work as a diplomat but im not sure how it works.

Anyway we shall see more of this in 2.3 and hopefully 2.7! Tbh excited for the dynamics. I wish for Sunday to find his path as a person but as a character....Im a fan of tragedy Soo....yeh

[refeminizeme]

THIS IS A KINK BLOG

18+ ONLY MINORS DNI

Mandatory disclaimer that transphobia in real life sucks and so does misogyny etc and i dont condone pretty much anything on this blog if its not in a consensual kink context, obviously. If this content triggers you pls block me, your mental health comes first.

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kink list

loves

forcefem/feminization!!!!!!!

bondage esp sh1bari

brainwashing/conditioning/mind control

bimboification/dumbification

hypnosis!!!!!

breathplay (incl. being choked and more)

dp

edging & denial

sensory deprivation ♡

humiliation

consensual blackmailing but only w ppl i REALLY trust

gaslighting/manipulation (consensually and negotiated first, and only w the right person so dont do this right out the gate)

likes

cnc (if in the mood, with the right person i trust, etc)

breeding/sometimes pregnancy

spirals

intox (consensually and for the right person)

degradation in very specific like, um, ways??? like um, i like sweet degradation.

exhibitionism but like um, im not like, TOOOOO into this its a minor kink for me

misogyny kink

hucow

curious about

lactation

will update as i like, think of more???? if u think of anything not on this list ask me about it n like, it just may get added hahahahahaha

hard limits

findom/me

v0mit

watersports/scat

cgl/ddlg/daddy dom anything

age/re

alternate personality stuff/anything related to that

feet

body shaming, esp weight related

weight control/eating disorder stuff

racism/racist slurs/etc

any kind of inc3st including daddy/mommy as a title

ass to mouth in any capacity

rimming (giving)

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some of my hypnotic triggers im like, willing 2 share publicly:

drop and sleep - some obvious ones, put me into a trance

deeper and deeper - makes me go deep real fast if used after drop and/or sleep

throb - makes me really horny and makes my cunt, well, throb

edge esp in all caps/bolded - makes me immediately reach an edge and if im touching i HAVE 2 stop until the edge has passed

like a good girl - makes me want to obey whatever precedes it

submit/surrender - makes me feel very obedient n like, submissive

truth [question] - makes my subconscious answer a question without my conscious mind being aware of it and i will immediately forget answering the question after

_______________________________________________

i occasionally make detr4ns/misgen/bimbofication files (you can find them here!!) but im primarily a sub.

I used to be ftm and hypnosis fixed my brain 🥴

I've been listening to files for like 4 years+ and this is like, how ive turned out bc of it???? I really am detransitioning n becoming the best bimbo i CAN be irl this is not like, ENTIRELY a fantasy for me but i dont like, condone this stuff outside of a consensual kink context to be clear. ask me abt it if ur confused lol

currently my tits are an F/I cup depending on the day bc i haven't been keeping up my regimen 😅

also fwiw i AM a bigger girl, which like, means dont expect me to be the waifish manic pixie dream girl many guys like, seem to expect??? My icon + header are both me so that shld give u an idea of what to expect.

I have a gdrive folder full of nüdes (51 things including a few videos!!) n im offering access 2 that 4 an upfront donation of whatever we agree is reasonable n a small upkeep donation every so often. I dont update it often, but I do update a lot at once.

Alternatively, should you be interested in more saucy content on the reg, I've made an MYM.fans acct!! I plan 2 upload all the good stuff on there n thats $10 a month, ish.

I also do custom hypnofiles, pics/vids/audios/etc. DM 4 details.

Lastly, should you feel like being generous n tipping/ buying me a gift, my c4sh4pp is $pavementflower n you can buy me gifts/contribute 2 gift money here!!

im in a polyamorous relationship with someone, n also a dynamic with a Dom. im not really looking atm but im open 2 play through asks just dont ask me 2 touch myself as I'm not allowed without permission 🙈

[nymph-ette111]

Hello! I’m grateful you wrote my request and this is in no way me complaining, I only want to answer what you said about accuracy and all. I’m well aware than npd is not well researched so I’m putting this more so as a way to give you more insight than complain about your portrayal, I’m chill with it. Sorry for the long message. It’s kinda hard putting this stuff into words, but I want to bc I’ve seen one too many posts about all ppl with npd needing to be ‚separated from the society, put down or castrated to stop their kind from spreading’ so I’m not about to waste an opportunity to put out a different perspective. If you don’t want to publically respond I’m chill with that, this is just some info for you if you wanna know more

I really resonated with the part where you said Toby loves like a dog because that’s also the metaphor I use to explain npd. Bc it kinda feels like you’re a dog, you love like one certainly. It feels like you were raised for cagefights. They taught you when you need to bite to survive and get a pat on the back. Taught you that if you didn’t, things get ugly for you. Taught you that everybody is a threat. You have never been prepared to read emotions because surviving and winning were always synonymous and both consumed your youth too much to genuinely learn social clues. And maybe, now you’re out of that place. And suddenly you’re expected to be a good dog, to love and be soft and kind. But the best you can do is act and frantically look around the room for a sign of a threat, because at this point you expects to be hurt. Sometimes you still bite. You know how to fight for your life but you flinch when someone wants to hug you. You’re mean and bitter at heart because as far as you know anyone could hurt you for any mistake you make. Showing weaknesses is out of the question, so you put on a mask. You need to be the best and to be perfect because you know what happened when you weren’t. You hate yourself for every mistake and see that as a life-or-death threat. You seek patterns to be safe and you learn to respond well to things without knowing why you should perform a certain way. You remember that when you used to make a wrong step, it was hell for you. And it’s hard to make a connection when you fear everybody hurting you. When you can’t grasp why anybody would keep you around if you’re not benefitting them. So you act like you’re great and hope that people believe you enough to think you’re worth having around

When I met my roommate in the school dorms I really liked her. A few weeks into knowing her, she started giving me food and trinkets. And many times, though I acted with all the gratitude that I always had to show and I did all the things you’re supposed to do, I felt lost. Because I wasnt very useful to her. She had no benefit from giving me things. Shamefully, I do admit I sat there alone tearing up at a chocolate bar or two that she left for me because it felt so confusingly nice(?) and I still don’t know why she does it. But of course I know (by observation) that people are uncomfortable when others question things like that. So I don’t, I just try to be useful and hope she decides I’m convenient to have (a ‚pleasure to have in class’ of sorts)

With manipulation it’s hard to say how much of it is true because most of the diagnostics were based off of male case studies and generally when the label of ‚npd’ has been slapped on someone, most things they do are seen as kind of evil. I know I do avoid conflict and use my words to my advantage if I feel threatened, yeah. Just yesterday had a friend getting progressively more heated at me (we have very different opinions on things as it turned out) and I did subtly framed it as ‚I thought you were more mature than that, it’s really childish to blow up on me’ bc I know he feels like the group doesn’t treat him seriously. Is it good? Maybe not, but a threat is a threat and I’m not about find out what he does when he gets really angry lol

As to the ‚look at me, I’m the best’ kind of thing, you have to put yourself first because you’ve been put last by everyone else. In a sense, it really does feel like fighting for your life and then being thrown into a setting where nobody had that growing up so you feel like you need to act like them and count days before everything turns ugly again because it’s hard to believe most people aren’t cruel and dangerous. That’s all you’ve known and all you prepared for

So you have a hard time forming honest connections. You feel like an empty shell and discard your smile as soon as you’re through the door. You’re tired. And you don’t know how to act in this new world. So you still do what you need to survive, despite everyone telling you that it’s not about that anymore

Like, ofc I have some personality. I know I like making music and enjoy a quiet evening. I know others tell me I’m fun at parties, funny, charming. Sometimes it’s hard to tell what is me and what is my survival instinct kicking in though. The way I see it, the modern mirror of Narcissus is in other people’s eyes. And I just try to do anything to keep seeing admiration instead of hatred in them

To be fair I feel like that would work (somewhat) with the creeps, because they aren't super well either and someone who can see patterns in their behavior (how they act when something is wrong etc) could work better bc I don't see then opening up and talking about feelings either. Sure, all those things kinda suggest that they could also mentally destroy me if they wanted (but I would let them bc I love them, especially your portrayal of ben 😌😌). Also I heve a feeling BEN is the kind of guy to show you gore videos for fun and talk about tormenting others for funsies so inability to emotionally connect with others would probably make it easier to enjoy yourself around him lmao idk about others probably trauma bonding would work?? Lol

-⭐︎

HELLO?? I FUCKING LOVE THE WAY YOU DESCRIBE THINGS OH MY GOD I'll try to respond to every point in this message because I really like it and thank you for reaching out so often I love when people interact with me :) literally get so excited once I see that little star emoji at the end of requests because I know it's you lol. I mostly based the headcanons off of people on Quora (other than more research on different sites) since it's people with said disorder talking about personal experiences and other people who don't have npds' interaction with people who do have it.

I fucking love when people use the dog metaphors for toby when writing him.

I agree on the point that some creeps would have this, Jeffrey comes to mind, I feel like a lot brush him off as an evil person but I see it as a sort of defense mechanism for him? I can definitely see Jeff relating to this for sure.

IM SO HAPPY YOU LIKE MY PORTRAYAL OF BEN X3 and that's so true I literally mentioned it in one of my headcanons like that stinky fucker would show you gore and legit go 'its not even that bad' when you start freaking out. Definitely pops up those videos on your devices randomly. He's so annoying I love him.

One thing I don't like about creepypasta headcanons that revolve around the reader having a personality disorder is the creators make them act so...nice? Like I know that's what people want to read but let's be honest these serial killers never experienced a day of comfort in their lives, I genuinely don't see them being all that nice about it unless it's more of the kinder creeps like Liu or Jane or Nina but even then they'd be awkward about it. The most they'd do is notice (unless you straight up tell them) and that's it. I wouldn't say they would straight up fucking degrade you for having a disorder but I don't see them caring because they're all traumatized, I don't see them sympathizing with reader so yeah that's something that kinda bugs me in creepypasta headcanons.

[kendrixtermina]

how finding your type can bring out your insecurities (& how this may actually be a misunderstanding)

I hadn’t put these on tumblr & it occurred to me that I probably should

1: 1s tend to be hard on themselves & constantly judge everything they or others do by criteria like factual correctness, appropriateness of morality. They can also have a fear of being bad or corrupt.

So when they read judgy hypocritical ppl who constantly give others the death glare they might freak out a bit – So they might end up being critical of themselves for… criticality, think they must be bad for having all these critical thoughts, constantly check themselves for the amount & appropriateness of criticism...

Some 1s beat themselves up for being critical without ever encountering typology, seeing as they are generally drawn to self-improvement, life advice & enlightenment etc & while some immature & unhealthy ones can be sanctimonious, average ppl with some shred of self-awareness are generally quite receptive to feedback, so often someone called them out for being critical & they tried to correct it or feel bad for it.

The counterpoint here is not even as simple as „its ok to make mistakes“ – the 1 attention pattern is to constantly evaluate everything, often in a ‚binaristic‘ fashion – Are the requirements met, yes or no? Is the room clean, yes or no? Have we correctly followed procedure, yes or no? Am I a good person, yes or no? - So a key insight here is that most people don’t immediately sort everything they see & might very much be willing to forgive 5% annoyingness on a 95% good person – especially if you’re willing to do the same.

2: 2s can often have the feeling that their needs are shameful & selfish, or nagging worries that no one really likes them & they just „tricked“ people into doing so.

When they read the descriptions, there mere suggestion that they may have any self-interest ever can feel like a confirmation of that: „Haha, you’re secretly needy just like you always wanted to avoid. Yes, you DID deliberately do things to make others like you. Some people might think you’re a pushy manipulator!“ - 2s can be particularly hard-hit by this cause they have a need to see themselves in a positive light, and may have had their more self-interested parts of their motivations (that ultimately, everyone has) repressed out of awareness.

Of course the real takeaway message is that wanting ppl’s love is a normal human trait & that ppl might be willing to give it – and that saying what you’d like might sometimes be more effective than trying to elicit it indirectly.

3: Some 3s can have this lowkey fear of having no real identity but what they deliberately present to the world, but even those who don’t might feel strong pressure to prove themselves as what their idea of being worthy/ valuable is (whether that is being the smartest, a badass leader, the most creative etc.)

So you see some individuals resist the typing with like real existential terror, „No, I’m real! I actually do have value! I’m not just pretending to be worth something. I’m real please believe me!“, sometimes decrying 3 as like being the „fake“ version of whatever type they think is the „real“ version of what they aim to be… which itself betrays an idea that your value as a person depends on fitting a certain prototype of value. Often their idea of the ‚target type‘ will have gotten a makeover that puts it nearer to Peak 3. (like appearing to picture it with a lot more social skills or motivation) Sometimes you get a person who’s studied the system for longer, has a correct idea of the other types, & hence puts themselves in the „none of them fit“ camp.

The real takeaway is of course that you actually have substance outside of ppl’s perceptions, even if those are what your attention often focusses on. You’re still there when no one’s looking – still real & still have value. Being a 3 doesnt mean you’re fake, it means that fear is an artifact of your perception algorithms. Though, if you see a way that you could realign your life to subjectively feel more in line with your feelings & preferences, that might help with that too. Eg, if something feels too much like an act or a stretch (as opposed to simply putting forward your actual good points so they aren’t missed), consider dropping it.

4: So, 4s fear being insignificant & replaceable, leaving meaningless lives, & build their sense of identity out of the differences they notice between themselves & others.

Even fitting into any sort of type at all kind of pokes at that – all this stuff you thought was unique to you & incomprehensible to others is actually a known quantity? There are thousands of ppl scattered somewhere out there who share it? If you are looking to define what’s uniquely you, that’s a huge „back to the drawing board“ moment. Was it all just illusion? Did all that suffering mean nothing? Was it just another instance of how you always ruin everything? Consider also that the 4 attention pattern involves reflecting upon your own feelings & responses, so for a while, you might be feeling a twinge of embarrassment everytime you see yourself Do A 4 Thing. Some also take it to mean that they are doomed to be unhappy & have dysfunctional relationships forever.

Some 4s throw themselves into self-develovement stuff to be rid of this „predictableness“,

& if this really does lead them to be freer & more enlightened and helping others do the same through taking a ‚shamanic‘ or ‚social critic‘ role, that’s great. The capacity for self-reflection that lets you a crisis of faith on your own is indeed one of strengths 4s can have.

Sometimes, however, it’s at least partially copium, an attempt at maintaining separation through being „more spiritual than thou“ & lambasting those who aren’t, but also pointing to their own messed-up-ness as an example for why people need to „repent“, in effect treating their typing as another reason why they’re irredeemably wretched.

Lambast away to your heart’s content, we have free speech here. However, what you might really question the basic premise that things that are shared or definable are always less meaningful. You’re never gonna be, like, a 6 or a 9 who’d take comfort in it if their suffering is shared, but if this particular shared or definable thing is important to you personally or just happens to be your personal truth, it may be more ‚authentic‘ to stand by it.

As for being doomed forever or irredeemable wretchedness…

Seeing as you’re wired to notice the negatives, you need not worry that you will ever „run out“ if you allow yourself to be happy 5 minutes. However, the fear that, if you allow yourself to rule something „good nuff“ it will be wrested away & you’ll be dissapointed again is harder to deal with cause that can never be 100% avoided. Disappointments can happen. But if you go looking for them preemptively before they hit you unexpectedly, you’re ensuring that they will happen. You might want to think about whether that is really what you want in each particular context.

5: 5s tend to have insecurities about being unable to satisfy others, of being inadequate, and of generally being empty and lacking.

So many among you probably devoured tons & tons of paragraphs & videos about how creepy, unfeeling, unlikeable and uncaring you are, and how frustrated, unsatisfied and neglected your spouse probably feels and how utterly Not Enough they probably find even the best of your efforts, precisely because of how it lowkey freaks you out.

You probably didn’t even get mad or indignant, you just resigned yourself to it – no use fighting against reality.

Many a guide to spotting the types in the wild goes into great detail about some hopelessly weird individual they met, detailing all the oddities of their speech and body language and how thoroughly impossible it was to connect with them in any meaningful way. Which is still alot less worse than the accounts that fall over themselves with pity for what an impoverished and diminished experience that person must be living, devoid of anything the presenter would consider meaningful or important. „Look at that weirdo! They’re so bad at existing! If only they let us save them, and by save them we mean throw out all their priorities and submit be meddled with according to ours!“ [funeral march starts playing]

Which is certainly not what anyone actually said nor how they meant it, but that’s how it can be heard.

Most 5s know better than to get indignant about something that’s plainly true but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t sting.

You have to realize that a lot of people aren’t even aware of the whole delayed reactions/ low level freeze thing & might be shocked to hear/notice it (& may have dismissed any such feedback as „they just don’t understand me“ or „its the others who are overdramatic or otherwise sus“) – and of course, your thinking immediately goes to how you’re inadequate.

I remember this mass freakout in the type subreddit where everyone was agonizing about whether their art might strike ppl as flat, lacking and feelingless.

And like, 80% had done some art and most of the rest „I wouldnt call myself an artist but I’ve dabbled“. That was a fairly creative bunch of ppl assembled there. Also, there’s plenty of famous musicians, poets and writers whom being a 5 plainly did not stop and whose works are not in the least considered flat lacking or feelingless. Some are renowned for quite the opposite.

So, if your art sucks its probably cause of you, not your type. And if it’s cause of you, actual practice probably helps, rather than just daydreaming about doing it… as would exposing what you’re working on to an actual test audience rather than tinkering with it indefinitely. (hence the high incidence of „works were published posthumously“) – what people think about your works, ideas or projects might surprise you, and leave you feeling a little less Inadequate(TM)

As for satisfying others, it would probably help not to unilaterally pack up and run for the hills the moment you think you can’t do what they want. You might be mistaken about what they want & be able to reach some mutually satisfactory agreement if you talk this over.

You can’t underappreciate (and I’m emphasizing this because of how much I underappreciated it) that normal people really really like spending time around each other. Like they don’t just want it more cause conventions say so or cause they need it more, they actually get a lot out of it.

So you might not actually have to jump through that many hoops for them to be happy about it, and when they say that they „just having you around“ even if you’re not obviously doing something useful, some of them might actually mean it. It’s not, in fact, too much to ask that they appreciate your efforts.

It’s mindboggling how anyone can hear those descriptions & think they sound like anything remotely desireable or like it would make you popular. To me it seems that to like being a 5 you’d have to already be one and even among those that are, some „wouldnt wish it on their worst enemy“. But that’s probably proof that the ppl who thinks it sounds great somehow don’t share this particular set of complexes and insecurities, and that the complexes themselves aren’t entirely rational. Not sure if relieved because of that or unsettled because of the biased nature of perception. Both at once, probably.

6: 6s seek to see through bullshit, be well-prepared for adversity & have the courage to deal with whatever the world throws at them. They have a fear of fear itself – eg. That they won’t be strong/brave/prepared/perceptive enough, that they’ll panic or crack & fail to protect their loved ones.

So, when they read the descriptions, they’re gonna be sensitive to the parts that sound scared, weak, panicky, dupeable or lacking in independence, as that is usually the exact opposite of what they want to be.

It doesn’t help that many 6 descriptions out there genuinely & objectively leave a whole lot to be desired, but the 6s themselves also tend to focus on the negatives, & distrust the intention behind the good traits („Loyal probably just means exploitable“) or deny that they even have any such good traits because they dont want to be blamed if they cant live up to the expectations it creates.

So actually, you might want to consider if it’s not worth the risk of admitting that you have some good traits, like being logical, discerning, perceptive, realistic, outspoken, resillient, resourceful, likeable and having strong convictions, solidarity, and a sense of justice. If they don’t all apply, focus on the ones that do. Or poll some ppl who actually know you, specifically.

Which brings us to the next point which is category thinking. It’s important to state that this isn’t per se about conformism or „completely defining themselves by labels“, but simply about seeing things through a lens of systems & categories. An intellectual/thinking lens, basically.

A well-developed, discerning 6 will be the first person to tell you that categories aren’t absolute and often overlap in contradictory ways, because they have a sophisticated & discerning understanding that can’t be compared to the less developed systemic thinking of someone who doesn’t use it as the main means to understand the world & hence hones it every day.

Still, this can cause them to heavily weight category labels when it comes to their identity.

A good way to spot a mistyped 6 is if they’ve made their type their username, they’re looking to connect with others of the same to comiserate about how the world did them wrong, they’re writing opinionated thinkpieces defending said type from misinformation... That’s the 6 „algorithm“, a behavior seen in many other areas of life.

(Notably, you never see a correctly typed 6 making their type their username, because, like most correctly typed people, they have some embarassment of the weak points.)

The tedency to „band together with others of shared interests“ is a sound survival strategy.

But here it can cause someone to become quite entrenched in or attached to the label they first arrived on even if it was just due to a simple beginners mistake or a set of bad descriptions.

Or they may resist a label they associate negatively because it would mean something drastic about who they are. Like they loathe conformism and think being a 6 would mean they are one.

But you’re still the same person before & after pinning some label on you to describe you. If you’re a 6 you’re already one, and if you are not conformistic now, saying you’re a 6 won’t make you that way.

Besides its quite natural to be annoyed with immature members of your own type cause, sure seems convenient & easy to just follow your worst impulses and avoid anything that challenges you rather than making an effort to be reasonable and/or fair to others…

7: One underappreciated thing is that part of the reasons that 7s avoid difficult feelings is that they believe they can’t handle them or that „everything will be awful forever“

So being typed as the „cant handle tough shit“ type can feel like a confirmation thereof. You see ppl lamenting possibly being shallow or wishing they were what they perceive as ‚deep‘ types, probably reflecting an inner complex that they must be interesting/entertaining enouh for others to like them.

eg. What they’re really afraid of here is, on the one hand, being boring or limited (for some being typed at all seems like a limitation, as every type has weaknesses.) and, on the other, since 7s often feel they can’t really depend on others, that others might get tired of them if you burden them with stuff like flaws, insecurities, or even just, like, limited entertainment value.

Plus, 7s have a need to see themselves in a good light, so confronting how they may have been selfish, irresponsible, unreliable or flakey in the past can be painful - & at that point it seems tempting to just put a checkmark under that whole ‚enneagram‘ thing & move on to the next cool-sounding curiosity.

What you might want to note instead is your tendency to think you need to have everything figured out at once, & how that is not a reasonable expectation is some contexts. You’re studying a system that’s supposed to tell you what biases you have, so it’s normal that it will point you to some errors or shortcomings, some of which will take a while to overcome – if it didn’t, it would not be very useful. But, knowing about it is an opportunity to do better.

Realizing you might have some flaws might be painful, so you might want to avoid sitting down & letting it sink in, but the feeling won’t last forever.

Also, you don’t need to always be nothing but awesome & dazzling & entertaining for people to like & accept you.

8: Now many do not, but generally 8s are the most likely type to say that they like being their type, & no doubt that some of them are grounded, pragmatic ppl who accept themselves & reality, see no point in wasting time wishing for an alternate reality that will never happen.

However, for some of those ppl it may rather be due to how their defenses work – they can’t attack you by saying you’re a villain if you flat out admit it. „Insecurities what insecurities? What do you mean, river in egypt? Talking how I’m a villain doesn’t bother me at all what do I look like some kinda softie? Nothing self-hating at all in going on about what a proud arsehole I am…“

The truth is that, at least in quiet, non-action moments, many an 8 may have had worries of being „too much“ for ppl to handle, or have regets about situations that they screwed up with their impulsive actions.

And now they’re apparently the „intimidating“, „rageaholic“ type? Ouch. Doesn’t help the whole complex about being „bad“ at all.

Also, many 8s have painful memories of situations where they felt they had to keep it together & ‚tough it out‘ despite extreme adversity, because else they would be finished, or because others relied on them to be the Unshakeable One, & the typing can probably remind them of that – it doesn’t help how the type tends to be idealized. Oh great, more ppl expecting you to be tough, more apparent conformation that no one will care how you feel inside.

On some level 8s want respect & consideration, but „hey please be nice“ seems like an obvious invitation for someone to come & do the opposite, so, what you see are aggressive responses to disrespect & preemptive posturing so nobody will dare do the disrespect (or far worse).

But is it really true that no one will care & that you always have to tough it out? Now, ovsly that doesn’t mean that it’s safe to tell all your sensitive & compromising information to the nearest oily used car salesman. That’s bullshit, as you were no doubt thinking already. But maybe in some special situations with some special people, you might feel better if you let them know what’s going on with you. After all you’re as deserving of care & consideration as everyone else, despite what that subjective sense of „badness“ may be telling you - & you’re probably more likely to get it if you get better at seeing where you’re actually being opposed and where preemptive strikes may be less needed.

9: 9s can have insecurities about thinking they’re unremarkable, don’t really have special traits, & that their presence doesn’t matter.

So at lot of the more unflattering traits like being reluctant to make waves, having a diffuse sense of self etc. may at first feel like a confirmation of this. „Ah yes im a boring person, I even got the Boring Person Type….“

Actually what being typed as a 9 means is, your subjective sense of being ‚just little old me‘ might be an illusion (so rather the opposite of confirming it), & you might have plenty of special strong points rife for discovery… and also, further cultivation. Withdrawn types underestimate how they might change things & might feel that it’s hopeless or not worth it, but that may not in fact be the case. So even if you think that you are, in fact, a doormat, you can change it - not overnight maybe, but, you know, manageable baby steps. More people will notice & appreciate your interestingness if you don’t hide it as much.

Consider this also: The fact that 9s are common means that a lot of ppl liked 9s, screwed them, and produced tons of little baby 9s. It’s probably not cause people loooove boring mates.

It might be worth looking up a list of widely beloved or accomplished Type 9 celebrities to dissuade yourself of the notion that it is in any way the „boring person type“. Would you say Tolkien was boring? Theoretically, you could be both a 9 and boring but your boringness would not be due to your type.

…

Of course, it is easy to list the conclusions like this. Even if you intellectually accept that it may be true it still won’t immediately feel true or sink in enough for you to act like it is. But being open to the theoretical possibility at least is a good start to allow the rest to happen and to „confirm itself“ through experience.

[petitprincess1]

"Honestly, I dont feel like anyone should be judged for not boycotting or like still enjoying certain products/streaming services."

Just wanted to tell you thank you for this.

My autism makes it hard for me to eat a lot of foods and there's maybe only 10 or so foods I can eat.

McDonalds is one of those foods and I always feel so guilty about it.

You're welcome and you're perfectly fine. I absolutely hate seeing ppl judging those that are just doing something for themselves. What we enjoy should not be a constant political statement. Like there are a lot of ppl that still enjoy music from problematic bands/artists. I love Skillet's songs, despite them being Trump supporters. I already download the music from YouTube anyway, so x3

And I def get that. I'm on the spectrum, too. (Self-diagnosed using actual psychological tests.) I'm incredibly picky when it comes to the stuff I like eating or wish to eat atm. Sometimes, I just want some chicken nuggies and liquid TV static (sprite).

So, yeah. As long as you're aware and you're in agreement, then go ahead. Enjoy what makes you happy. I promise you that that doesn't make you a bad person. You're human.

Plus, boycott fatigue is real, esp when you constantly feel judged or are being guilt-tripped and manipulated (I'm looking at you TikTok 😑)

[daz4i]

I'm gonna sound a bit bitter for a sec so sorry for that, but i think the reason i can't get into most fyolai fics and such, in addition to a lot of ppl just straight up getting nikolai wrong as a character, is the flattening of their relationship in general and making it almost basic? or rather, i guess, just simplifying it, making it almost one sided at times

basically what i see people interpret them beyond what's in plain text is 1 nikolai is the only person to call fyodor a friend, thus making him stand out in his mind, and 2 they're both the same brand of weird/got the same quirks or sense of humor etc

which are both well and true imo. but my problem is, this is where it stops. this is what i mean by simplifying. it feels like it's only engaging with the tip of the iceberg of what they got going on, and it's a shame because their relationship can be so spicy

i think what makes fyolai interesting - in addition to the whole "i love him and that's why i want to kill him, i can't bear the thought of being tied to a person" - is that while fyodor is the first person to see nikolai, nikolai is the first person to outsmart fyodor

it almost feels like the reason people make fyodor like nikolai is for the sake of making a story about them happen and that's it. now, it's a romantic(?) fanfic, that's understandable, that's how most of them start. but it does feel unearned and at times even out of nowhere and pointless

nikolai is the first person to show fyodor that humans aren't as predictable as he thinks. that yes, he could read him, but not fully, not enough to actually manipulate him. that his method of cutting off all other possibilities is not perfect, and that at least nikolai will always get himself a way out. that's huge!! we've never seen anyone outsmart fyodor! the closest we got was whatever he's got going on with dazai, and he seems to be prepared for everything dazai throws at him anyway bc they're so equal. but honest to god going outside of his plan? ruining his plan, even? nikolai is the only one who could do it.

think about how that can impact fyodor's character! his world view! a blow to his pride that might actually change him as a person! this can be so interesting!!!!

i feel like this ship should be more about that. about how they're each other's special person - not because of titles of friendship, but because they truly challenge the way the other sees life

now, i will say, i don't expect fic writers to delve this deep into each character. it's just a hobby at the end of the day. let me emphasize, this post isn't to actually attack anyone, more like an observation with some bitterness about something i am well aware does not actually matter, bc i want to let it out and maybe change the way people see this ship if they agree. so i hope i made you see it this way, just like fyodor might show nikolai he's not as alone in the world as he might want to be, and nikolai can show him the same in return uwu

[feathergail]

ppl are still saying you’re manipulating people about the situation with the blog trying to defend adults talking to minors about sexual stuff 😭

i had every right to call out a popular blog for saying “i talk to minors about sexual things but it’s okay because they started it!”. there was no manipulation, all i did is share what was said to me.

and i don’t think ppl realize the original context is that i was trying to argue that it’s not okay for an almost 30 year old to talk to a 17 year old about their explicit sexual experiences lol. without consent too lol. the situation here wasn’t supposed to focus on what vqler did, but more of what they could do, since they’re still defending all of this and even wanting to make “pedophile memes” (even tho i not once stated they were a pedophile) and a milestone event out of this.

and i want to clarify! no, i do not think minors are innocent! no, minors should not be going to adults online about sexual content! but clearly they don’t understand how that’s not okay if they’re doing it. which is why i’m making such a big deal out of this, because this is the #1 reason most teens become victims: being unaware of what’s okay and not. many adults in this community are not aware how dangerous it is to indulge an adolescent in sexual conversation.

i am done with this situation, like i’ve stated before. i do not regret spreading awareness and i’d do it again if it meant protecting teens from having to deal with what i did growing up in this community.

[lordystrange]

other anon: “he hangs out with a bad crowd who's a lot older than him and he seems to be quite an impressionable ppl pleaser”

I think people need to look at that for the reality of it then. which is there are 30+ year old people attaching themselves to a (very freshly) 19 year old (who they met at 18 or even younger, so a child), with their own agendas and mindsets. a lot of these people he met on the manipulative propaganda trip earlier in the year where they use his beautiful religion and culture for promo of the country. it’s routine, wasn’t just him doing it. and they’ve kept the contact up. oh you know they love it, freaks leeching off him. and I don’t need anybody saying I’m making excuses for his choices when it’s not the case, I just thought it’s important to note the phrasing in some ways people speak about noah.

because things like “when I was 19 I wasn’t like that” from people mean nothing. congrats I guess! you’re actually still immature for saying that instead of understanding not everyone grows up like you do, so you have some growth to do anyway 😊. statements like that neglect the truth of his age, the fact that it is not the same as all the middle aged people with decades of damage and chances to educate themselves behind them, is he closer to 40 or is he closer to 17? or 14? he is grown enough to make decisions like hanging out with certain people, but that does not stop manipulation and harm done especially for - as other anon said - a people pleaser. I swear people speaking don’t know a thing about indoctrination. has anyone heard of the disease of US patriotism? was that not also bad and shown to be running deep a few years ago? how is that different, especially after an attack that would have the influential adults around you in high emotion likely parroting some ignorant beliefs (because believe it or not, there isn’t a huge jewish population worldwide for uhhh… a pretty well known reason actually! and the fact of the matter is that pretty much everyone knows someone living in isn’treal. many fucking idiots have overblown that attack of course, but the direct emotional ties are real - people just stretched it thin.)

I don’t ask people to justify his actions or make it some parasocial going easy on him situation, it’s just being able to have a wider view of the situation is important and what nobody is doing. instead favoring getting popular tweets and wishing death on him for extremely small things in the grand scheme of politicians and people in govt with actual real influence, or brett for eg. noah is not the person anybody should be prioritizing, he’s an easy target and everybody looks so painfully stupid hating on him daily like that’s doing anything for the cause they all supposedly care about.

don’t even get me started on the amount of antisemitic lean a lot of posts about noah have, that is not or will it ever be ok. you need to learn your history, people, and be careful of dog whistles in your performative rage.

Thank you for the ask.

And you’re right. If we want to be critical about him (which we should be), we have to be critical about the whole situation.

People also seem to forget, that US and Israel are a lot alike. Both are colonizers and their governments are committing actions that are lethal. Yet I don’t see people canceling celebrities who support US.

(I’m aware that the situations are different, but I still think this topic should be talked about more.)

And the age thing is also important to notice here. I was at my dumbest at 19. And while I’d like to believe that age doesn’t matter that much when everyone’s an adult, it does. It just does. I know there were rumours of Noah dating that old guy and there’s nothing to confirm it’s true, but also nothing to confirm it’s not. But if it is true and if he is the ”source” of Noah’s behavior lately, I hope the situation changes.

Very sorry for turning your ask into speculation. But it is honestly a very likely possibility.

[vallcro]

I read all that. ;p And I think it's interesting the psychology behind Joey's actions.

Regarding the bit in your tags, whether or not Tracy should do something bad- I think that depends on where you want the story to go.

Do you want it to be purely self indulgent? Then go ahead with all your favorite tropes and don't pay any mind to what others will think.

Do you want it to be very realistic? Real life victims can still end up doing no wrong but most are flawed because people are flawed.

And if you're lucky you might get both of these at once.

In the end it depends on what you want to do with his character. And how you want it to affect the story. If you'd like you can make his *lack* of action affect his character and story too. And of course you can make an AU of your OCs where something else happens in a different universe.

But I'll ask anyways. Regardless of whether or not he'll actually do something in the story, what would be Tracy's limits?

Would he commit an equally deplorable act and try to get his abuser to abuse another kid to set himself free?

Would he come up with some sort of self defense and abuse Joey back?

Would he do something that's actually moral but might seem immoral to someone who's been manipulated, like reporting his abusers?

I Think The Psychology Behind Joeys Actions Is Also Interesting Bc I Don’t Really Understand It And I’m The One Writing It LOL

When I Write I Like Writing Things I Think Other People Would Enjoy As Well As Myself So Idk If I Want It To Be Entirely Self Indulgent Just Mostly Bc There Is A Lot Of Ppl That Enjoy Smol Bean Bottom x Big Mean Top Like I Do

Honestly I Can’t See Tracy Actually Doing Something Super Bad The Worst Thing He’d Do Is Probably Be Mean To His Little Sister In Typical Middle Child + Big Brother Fashion And Calling Joey The F Slur Despite Knowing He Struggles With Internalized(And Tbh Externalized) Homophobia But Thats Not Like Awful And Most Defiantly Not Comparable With Being A Perpetrator Of SA And DV

So The Worst Tracy Is Gonna Do Is Be A Little Mean And Sassy Sometimes

For The Doing Something Moral That Might Seem Immoral Bc He’s Been Manipulated And Shit: Idk If This Is Considered Like A Morally Good Thing To Do But I Wouldn’t Say It’s Bad But Tracy Defiantly Feels Guilty Abt The Whole Thing With His Moms BF Even Tho He’s Technically Aware That What His Mothers BF Does Is Sexual Abuse And In Any Other Case The Victim Would Never Be At Fault He Still Blames Himself And Can’t Help But Feel Like He Did Something To Bring It On Himself His Brain Def Flip Flops Between “You Have A Perfectly Good Reason To Not Tell Your Mom Finding Out She Got With A Child Predator Would Kill Her + He Threatened You” And “The Fact This Has Been Going On For So Long And You Haven’t Told Your Mom Is Proof Your Basically Asking For It ATP Your Just Fucking Your Moms BF Bc You Want To” So He Definitely Feels Like He’s Doing Something Immoral There

I’m Still Trying To Figure Out If I He’ll Eventually Tell His Mother Abt Her BF Or Not My Original Plan Was For Joey To Be The One Who Helps Tracy Be Able To Finally Tell His Mom Abt It But I Think That’s Giving Him Too Much Credit TBH LOL Joeys Probably Worried If Tracy Realizes He Has The Ability To Report One Abuser He Might Realize He Has The Ability To Report Both Rendering Joey Both In Trouble With His Parents, With The School They Go To Probably, And Maybe Even The Law As Well As Leaving Him With One Less Tracy In His Life </3

Even Though Joey Beats On Tracy And Hates The Idea Of Anyone Else Touching Him He Also Genuinely Loves Tracy Even If He Has A Strange Way Of Displaying It

[m0tel6mxzzy]

i hate “dark psychology” tiktok NO!!! as a psych major, psychology can be such a beautiful resource for basic coping and time management as well as study skills. u don’t need elaborate terms to manipulate people to make it sound cute, you clearly wanna do it anyway so you don’t need to come off smart to justify it. knowing what love bombing is is useless if you understand why it’s bad but continue to do it for your own pleasure at the expense of others.

what’s “fun” for you could scar someone else for life and effectively make them anxious around others over your behavior bc they’re now fearful of the threat of your behavior from other people. if you have to do xyz animal mermaid siren triangle eye trick for someone to “like” you, you probably shouldn’t be in a relationship atm because you don’t yet know tools for open communication which is vital for one to survive. you have to communicate your feelings for one to work, not do whatever you want and expect the person you like to be a mind reader when you put zero work into communication to foster trust and honesty. not everyone is going to see you look at them and do ur makeup a certain way and think “they like me, i should reciprocate.” you have to do the vulnerable thing and accept the possibility of rejection. not avoid it at the expense of yourself and others. that’s human life.

psychology is supposed to be understanding of human thought and behavior so you can help others, not make their lives worse. and if u get off on hurting other ppl enough to brag abt it w/ a guide that’s literally a sign you lack self awareness and could benefit from the coping tools in psychology more than anyone else

[ardentpoop]

I know you don’t really like dean and Samdean in a really shippy way because you find dean to be abusive so I’m kind of curious: why do you like Sastiel/castiel? As another Sam girl I don’t really like Sastiel/castiel because I found the whole wall breaking thing in s7 to be horribly resolved and unforgivable tbh. But at the same time I sort of see the appeal in Sastiel where Cas is a simp for Sam. It’s more the fanon that is appealing to me than the canon but I’d love to hear your opinion as well.

who said I didn’t like dean and samdean in a shippy way LMAOOO 😭 im just not a fan of Generic Fandom Ship Treatment it’s painfully boring to me and tends to gloss over or manipulate individual characterizations as well as the actual power dynamics involved. and also I don’t like when ppl invalidate platonic readings of these relationships I think genfic enjoyers and slashfic enjoyers should be holding hands and kissing (i.e. exchanging ideas)

samdean is The most individually compelling relationship in this show to me not in spite of it being abusive but because of it!!!!!! this is the thing that I wish all the people romanticizing it could understand. I’m not suggesting it’s inherently wrong to engage with relationship dynamics like this thru a romantic/sexual lens lmfao I’m suggesting it’s so much more interesting to explore the psychological implications when you’re fully aware of what’s going on as opposed to somehow reading it as ~toxic on both sides but coalescing into something beautiful~

this logic extends to sastiel and tbh to every other sam ship I really enjoy (which says a lot abt sam’s place in the story given I ship him with almost every character in this show.) sastiel would not be interesting to me if it wasn’t also deeply fucked up!

anon join me in appreciating the cathartic pleasures of “problematic shipping” when you aren’t ignoring or obfuscating the true power dynamics and their impact on each character’s psyche there’s a whole new world of stomach-churning yet validating literature waiting for you

p.s. sincerely love you for asking me this lol bc I like to make it clear where I stand

[aspd-culture]

So what would you say is crucial to aspd if the textbook criteria (usually based in ableism) isn’t always adequate? Because a lot of my issues stemmed out of pure, unadulterated rage that I (not inaccurately) attributed to developing bpd + npd as a kid and as we all know, those disorders can be intense on their own. I’m asking not out of “prove you have aspd if you don’t meet violent requirements” (idk people are weird and bad faith), but more so like seeing these anons who don’t fit the textbook criteria having realizations. I happen to be alongside the more violent urges and have been since I was a kid but I always attributed those things, again, to budding bpd and npd and autism dysregulation

I've discussed this at length in various posts throughout this blog, but pretty much every criteria of ASPD can be taken in much less literal ways than many professionals account for when evaluating for ASPD.

Aggression is a criteria, but you can be aggressive without being violent. The criteria mentions breaking social codes as a form of rule breaking/disrespect for authority, but many professionals only ask about law breaking and/or only violent crimes. Disrespecting authority doesn't always mean not listening to what they tell you (that particular explanation should be easy to find by searching baboon on my blog - I'll leave you to search for the post to find out why). You can manipulate without causing harm to other people. Lying is not always pathological and/or detrimental to anyone's life - sometimes it's as simple as BSing strangers when they ask you where you work and for some reason something in you begs you to say something blatantly untrue just to see if you can get away with it. Doing hard drvgs comes with significantly more risk to your life, liberty, and pursuit of convenience than just burning some leaves (whichever leaves are legal in your area) and/or drinking, so many of us just stick to that because why bother with the other stuff when there are so many reasons not to? Breaking my own stuff? Totally legal if a lil scary for ppl around me. Breaking other people's stuff loses me access to those people, that stuff, and possibly my own freedom, so why wouldn't I make sure if something's gonna be broken, it belongs to me?

All of these are "atypical" presentations of ASPD criteria, and yet I've found that the vast majority of pwASPD actually present "atypically" because we don't actually want to spend our lives dealing with the excess effort required to be intentionally malicious.

Something I think is seriously missing from the conversation about ASPD (traits not criteria) is the tendency it gives you to view everything you do in life from a matter of being as convenient and efficient as possible and going out of my way to be violent is gonna put me in jail which is massively inconvenient and therefore big lame to my ASPD brain.

I mean, think about it this way, why would someone with a disorder that hates boredom, can't stand authority, and has trouble with rules *willingly* put themselves into a box with bars, guards everywhere that control your life, and a strict routine you have to follow to get out of the box faster? All of that sounds like the last thing I want in life, so of course I use my limited effort to follow the law. The law is far less restrictive than the punishment for breaking it, and life is easier when I'm kind to people (and I can get what I want faster that way).

Overall, in many ways I think ASPD criteria misses the fact that most pwASPD are very aware of what the consequences to not following the rules of the game we call "civilized society" are, and know which of those rules we can break (mostly social code as opposed to legal code) without ending up dealing with more bs than when we started.

The current criteria acts like we have no forethought, and it just uses a really naïve, prosocial way of thinking about ASPD imo.

And none of this is meant to invalidate those with the "typical" presentation of these symptoms! I'm sorry if it comes off that way, because those are totally valid presentations as well. It's just frustrating bc a whole section of the community thinks that bc I prioritize avoiding behaviors that make life harder for me (would I be violent in a world that didn't consider that behind bar worthy? Yeah, of course I would), that somehow invalidates my diagnosis.

In short, I agree with many of (almost all of) the core concepts of the criteria but not the extremely literal and narrow ways that criteria is boxed into by some professionals and p much all elitists. The worst part is the actual wording of the DSM-V isn't so restrictive and does make space for non-violent and law abiding pwASPD, and some professionals ignore that fact and project their opinions of ASPD onto the criteria they use to diagnose.

[sapphyreopal5]

I'v seen a lot of ppl wondering why Jensen always speak of elta in away that make her Seen as a control freak , the answer is elta herself want that image and it's a narrative that both agreed to sell to the public, there's is a video of them from the NYCC con and Jensen was talking about letting his hair grow then elta started to say I like it I like it then Jensen looked at her and said she might has something to do with it then she raised her thumb as a sign of approval as she finally took the credit and as I predicted when the video went viral her fans was like omg D has the final say ! , she likes that image because she is narcissistic and insecure and it also make her feel that she worth something as the only person she can exercise her control over is Jensen, as for Jensen I'm not seeing him happy with that , he is not some super liberal women loving man , the image that he love to portray is alfa macho male, and he is definitely not doing it out of love and respect for her as he clearly repulsed by her , the only explanation is he give up to her and enable her its almost like he buy his peace by feeding her ego , now do i think Jensen need to be saved? no but what he need is to grow some balls , Jensen isn't strong enough to leave this women, any man with self respect wouldn't let skunky woman like elta to control his life or even feeding such an image to the public but Jensen ain't that man, however he should at least try to solve the things with her so he could be happy , but knowing Jensen that won't happen, the man is incapable of setting boundaries and there's no cure to elta's malignant narcissism so he will continue to sell this poor excuse of marriage while she leeches off his money and he do everything possible to stay away from her and I honestly feel sorry for the life that he choosed to live

Hello Anon thank you for the ask. So some people would disagree with the Jensen not needing to be saved tidbit. Not sure if you believe in witchcraft or anything of the sort. However, I was made aware of some comments made specifically on Jensen's (or should I say "Jensen's") birthday post to Danneel as seen here. I myself have been talking to this individual but on another account of theirs and I have to say even though they are not on Tumblr or even in this fandom, they seem to have picked up many things as a fellow seer. It's been said for years amongst some in this fandom Danneel has been practicing black magic, which I myself believe is true. While "free will" is a thing on Earth, humans on Earth are still very prone to being brainwashed and manipulated to the point of compliance even at their own detriment. This is just nature of mankind on Earth. Sure he "chose" this life and chose to marry her but there does seem to be some very strong reluctance on Danneel's part to let Jensen go, despite his clear animosity towards her publicly.