#the Malfoys

[meemoop]

The Appointment

Me going to my first doctor appointment for the first time by myself

[lilbeanz]

POV: Draco had a nightmare.

[daddiesdrarryy]

Lucius: Son, since you are together with that Potter boy, your mother has told me to give you “the talk”

Draco: …okay

Lucius: All right, Draco, you see, with a man, as you two get in bed together, when he inserts himself—

Draco: Insert himself? Insert himself where?

[moutainrusing]

Lucius: You’re starting to look more and more like me everyday, son.

Four-year-old Draco, bursting into tears: But I don’t wanna look like you! You’re ugly!

Narcissa, leaving the room so she can laugh while owling Alice about how Draco has inherited her opinions:

[wilberia]

Malfoy patriarch and his son. Can't stop thinking about his bow..🎀

[jmscornerlibrary]

Lucius: (holding baby Draco) We made this!

Narcissa: ...I believe so.

Lucius: He's an absolute treasure, a thing of perfection, beauty! How was this even possible?

Narcissa:

Lucius: I mean, look at me. I'm a horrible person.

Narcissa:

Lucius: the only good thing about me is genetics, really, and those aren't even mine to begin with. Yet look at this!

(holds up Draco like he's Simba)

Lucius: *tearing up* This is literally an angel, a cherub straight from the heavens! And we made this! This is half me! I can't believe I did this.

Narcissa: Do you know what else you've been doing?

Lucius: what?

Narcissa: Drinking.

[blorger]

Look, listen, this is a very important question for the culture: why does the hp fandom at large like to act like Lucius Malfoy meant to open the chamber of secrets?

Book 2 Lucius Malfoy was clearly in his live laugh love era; the Great Diary Reshuffle of 92 was very much an improv moment, a petty action to mess with a Weasley and get rid of a cursed artifact at the same time. I'm sure he went home feeling real proud of his innovative problem-solving.

Even when Draco recounts the letter from his father, all we get from Lucius is basically "sit tight and watch", not exactly the words of someone invested in the outcome.

I'm very much in the "the diary was left to Abraxas Malfoy and Lucius had no idea what it really was" camp, tho that is just a personal spice I like to add to the books, am unsure of jkr's actual intentions (if she even thought it through to that extent)

[the-phoenix-heart]

Sorting Hat Chats - The Malfoys

Since the Malfoys have been a bit of a hot topic lately, I decided to give them their sorting post similar to what I did with the Weasleys...3 years ago??? Where does the time go??

Anyway, this is an explanation of the system I am using by @wisteria-lodge.

LUCIUS MALFOY is blatantly a Badger secondary. His methods are to make donations to people, goad Arthur Weasley into a fight so he can slip Ginny the diary, he uses blackmail against the other members of the Board of Governors, calling in favors, and when in the hall of prophecies with Harry and his gang his strategy is to talk him into giving the prophecy over. It's what makes him so effective in the first five books, but is also why once everyone knows the truth about him he is in a constant state of free fall.

As for his primary, I think it's fairly obvious that he's a Snake. He can look like a Badger, dehumanizing muggleborns and joining the Death Eaters, but that's a performance. When the chips are down, what Lucius really cares about himself, his wife, and his son. Snake Lucius is willing to get rid of every association to the Death Eaters he had, and in the Second Wizarding War is not enjoying himself at ALL. He's also clearly got that Snake hedonism to him.

NARCISSA MALFOY née BLACK is an equally blatant Snake primary, although she doesn't appear to even play the part of a Badger. Everything to her is her son and her husband (and her husband takes a backseat to her son usually). Narcissa doesn't even appear to like Bellatrix all that much anymore since Bella is a threat to her family. Down to the end her motivation is always to keep Draco safe, damn the consequences.

As for her secondary, since she's such a minor character you can probably make an argument for any of them. But I personally think she's a Snake secondary, making her a Double Snake. This is a woman who lies to Voldemort's face and doesn't get caught. Who is willing to go behind his back and make back-alley deals with someone like Snape.

I've sorted DRACO MALFOY once before with @awinterrain which you can read right here, but I would like to reiterate it and expand on it.

Draco may be the epitome of Slytherin in the books, and he may hate Hufflepuffs and think of them as "duffers," but this boy is Double Badger down to his bones. This is a boy who cares deeply about communities. He defines himself by them, first as a Malfoy, then as a Slytherin, then as a Seeker on the quidditch team, then as part of the Inquisitorial Squad, then as a death eater (which he doesn't care for). I think at the beginning of the series he's a good case for an Immature Badger primary, where he just IS the group he's into and nothing outside of this.

His Badger primary can look very insular and Snake-like, partially because pureblood culture alienates everyone outside of it, and partially because his family is so Snakey that it colors the look of his Badger primary. Idk if I would even call it a performance or a model, it's more like a flavor.

But he does start to look like a Snake primary in his Sixth Year, where he's single-mindedly focused on saving his family. That's because in Sixth Year he burns after joining the Death Eaters. And it's honestly really sad, but it's because Draco has realized his communities are toxic and not good for him. The Death Eaters aren't good, they're the reason his father is in prison and his mother is in danger. This is the year where he really stops engaging with his peers and is sort of just coasting on his former reputation.

But that Badger shine is still there, and it's in the fact that Draco Malfoy has to kill Dumbledore and cannot do it. A true Snake Draco Malfoy would probably have gone through with it, even if it he felt bad about it. Badger Draco, who spent books 1-5 shit talking Dumbledore at any opportunity, cannot do it. I think it's because 1. He isn't ready for casual murder, and 2. I think Dumbledore for Draco represents one more community that he identifies with-Hogwarts. And clearly he does care about Hogwarts (I don't think the Room of Requirement would reveal itself to him if he did).

As for his secondary, Draco is his father in miniature. Draco is a tattle tail, he has bodyguards that follow him around, he usually goads Harry into confrontations so Harry gets into trouble and Draco can have plausible deniability. What's most interesting to me though is Draco's proclivity for elaborate smear campaigns. The "Potter Stinks" badges are HIS work as is the "Weasley is Our King" song, which is very...mean badgery. Like this is his community building with Slytherin (arguably all of Hogwarts with the badges), and using his powers to bully Harry. It's funny, despite everything. He does perform Snake though, to make everything look quicker or look like his mother.

Even his methods when he has to kill Dumbledore are Badger powered. Working on the Vanishing Cabinet all year, poisoning Professor Slughorn's mead he intended to give Dumbledore, and charming Rosmerta to imperious Katie Bell. But, he still has that influence from his mom where he can lie to someone's face (though not as convincingly).

I think Draco looks at his father's Badger performance, and thus thinks they house match. And it explains why he is so wary of his father after the Death Eater reveal, since Draco has realized he does not enjoy that sort of Badger primary.

As a bonus I decided to sort BELLATRIX LESTRANGE née BLACK as well. Since for some reason the movies always advertised her as part of the Malfoys. No doubt about it she is a Lion secondary. I don't think Bellatrix has every learned the meaning of the word subtle. She never lies in the series, just blasts the truth out whenever, and is always an attack first think never character.

As for her primary, can she be anything other than exploded snake primary? Her everything is Voldemort. She doesn't really care for anyone outside of him, with the exception of Narcissa, who stopped liking Bellatrix when she became a danger to her son. I think at one point she had a Badger performance or model that allowed her to willingly marry someone like Rodolphus who she doesn't appear to like, but by the time she's going to Azkaban she doesn't care. It's honestly such a Black Family sorting. Sirius was a Snake Lion as well, and the culture of the "Noble and Most Ancient House of Black" seems to just be Snake coded in general.

So...

Lucius Malfoy - Snake primary, Badger performance/Badger secondary

Narcissa Malfoy nee Black - Snake primary/Snake secondary

Draco Malfoy - Badger primary, Immature at the start, burns in his Sixth Year, has a Snake performance or flavor/Badger secondary, Snake performance

Bonus:

Bellatrix Lestrange nee Black - Exploded Snake primary, Badger performance/model long discarded/Lion secondary

Sirius Black - Snake primary/Lion secondary

[actuallymoon]

*Lucius having an obsession with his dark artifacts collection and peacocks*

Narcissa: I like that autistic man, and is it wrong when I ask "is you autistic?" Because I like that in a man, mhmm

[mrsnerdygirl]

I hate, HATE IT, when i see people online that ship Draco Malfoy with Hermione Granger, make Astoria Greengrass, a character that we know NOTHING about, a bad guy.

Or people who say that, Narcissa and Lucius forced Draco to get married to her, but he loved Hermione.

Astoria was a bad mom.

After Astoria died, Hermione took her place etc, etc.

Stop it . You know nothing about Astoria, but if you used your brain you would realise that she was actually very liked. She was a good person who supported Muggle borns, and that is why Narcissa and Lucius didnt like her . She was nothing like the Malfoys.

Astoria was an amazing mom and wife. Both her son and husband were devastated to lose her, and Draco nor Scorpius ever replaced her .

Stop putting down characters that do not deserve it, only so that you can enjoy your fics and ships.

[expectopatronum18]

I feel like Narcissa Malfoy is rather overhyped(when she isn't being forgotten completely) as a character. She is the perfect example of 'the aristocratic wife' until the real world hits her in the face (and even then it takes a while).

Coz in the books she doesn't do shit. We have no indication that she has any sort of job(not that she'd need one). You could say she raised Draco but I don't count that because she did such a bad job at it; Draco turned out to be a spoilt, entitled bully (tho ofc Lucius equally shares the blame for this). She was pretty, came from money and a respectable family, and had no real valuable contribution of her own (unlike bellatrix who had the first 2 things too but was voldemort's right hand DE). Lucius has a constant presence in the books, we see different ways in which he subtly exercises his power and influence (ranging from donations to cozy up to fudge to threatening the other board governors that he'll curse their families if the don't remove dumbledore from the position of headmaster), plus his whole arc from one of voldemort's most trusted DEs (he was entrusted with a horcrux) to the pathetic situation we see him in in DH. Narcissa, however, has nothing of this sort. She's briefly introduced during the Qudditch world cup, not mentioned at all in book 5, and is an absolute dumbass in book 6.

Ik tht last one is controversial, but i was with bellatrix the whole time, coming to snape was fucking stupid. I get tht she thought he was on their side, especially considering he was with the DEs during the first war too, but y tf would u trust a double agent? Him convincingly answering all of bellatrix's questions means nothing, its obvious that he'll hv similarly tailored answers for dumbledore. I get that she was terrified and desperate, but it always struck me as odd that she never volunteered to take her 16 y/o son's place to get the task done (or at least we don't get any mention of this, and at any rate i don't think voldy wud hv oblidged considering this was punishment for lucius's failures), or if she already knew that this wasn't a viable option, she doesn't even try to help him out herself. Instead she runs straight to snape and weeps on his floor. This is so unlike, say, lily, who stood in btw her baby boy and voldemort. Mind u, the whole thing worked out only because dumbledore put on the ring and was going to die in a yr, she got lucky( imo this is lyk remus getting lucky with keeping sirius being an animagus as a secret coz he didn't turn out to be a mass murderer after all). U couldn't even say she was using snape too because she's clearly too distraught in tht scene to be doing any kind of manipulation. It all falls on the shoulder of her 16 y/o son to keep his family safe from voldemort.

She doesn't do anything throughout book 7 until the very end, where she lies to voldemort just to know if her son's alive or not, which inadvertently leads to voldemort being defeated by harry. This is only thing of substance she does in the entire series(and likewise i ll give her the credit, it was ballsy asf). As much as i appreciate her for what she did in the end, i think the fact that it took her roughly 40 years to do something of value is heavily ignored.

[meemoop]

The Shopping Trip

a little light hearted comic for you all 💕💕

[lilbeanz]

Draco & Bartholomew playing together -- 1985

Source:

[basiatlu]

F2 with snucius if u like it? Or B1 with snily? Love ur artstyle!!

I hope you enjoy Sev’s messy apron over his apprentice robes - gave me a small chuckle

[sneverussape]

for @crocky-wock and @wanderusprince who wanted to see teenage choir boy severus and the malfoys being able to watch him by accident :) i’m so sorry it’s so sketchy but my life has been so busyyyy

bonus: sev getting ready

[wilberia]