#the betrayers having to put in work to save everything is so fun actually

[revvethasmythh]

it's actually so funny and telling that the champion of the strife emperor is working with the volition and opposing the imperium. RIP to bane, I know you love a good imperium, a hot conquest, sexy war and subjugation and tyranny. alas this time the conquest, war, subjugation, and tyranny will KILL YOU, and so here we are. working with freedom fighters, of all things. oh how the mighty fall

[stafyliaa]

"Miles it's me!"

Prowler!Miles x Spiderhero!Reader (gender neutral)

cw: angst,Jeff being funny,mentions of Jeff death (sorry it's earth 42 😭),tears,no comfort (maybe there will be on part two) "betrayal" and a big misunderstanding

Hii! This is my first time writing hehehe give me a chance and please be nice :D im gonna do a ending to this fic but it's gonna take a while

I'm more than happy to write requests so don't be shy!!

You are Miles lover..but you are also the friendly neighborhood Spider hero! While Miles is the Prowler! And the worst..you both didn't know that

But you never thought Prowler was a bad guy,he actually helped people too but- he kinda hates you for some reason

maybe he was jealous of the amount of popularity you have and how you are incredible strong and how your suit was soooo pretty so yeah,who cares about Prowler anyways? He's a douchebag

As for Miles..He is the best!!

He looks like he is trying to poop everytime with that "scary" face of him but he is really sweet and respectful boy

he respects your space and supports your decisions,he is great with gifts (handmade or purchased) and never fails to make you feel especial regardless of anything ♡

You were great friends with his family too! They love you! But, something happened

His dad was captain Morales,he passed away doing his job..being a hero without spider powers or something like that yeah good guy

You remembered that when he was alive he didn't liked the ideia of a masked hero around (another jealous man),but after some events you kinda "worked together" to protect the peace at the city

The Spiderhero and captain Morales protecting our dear Brooklyn! couldn't get better

he enjoyed talking about his son and you can't deny it was fun to see what Miles was like from his father's point of view

"My boy has a beautiful significant other,i consider them as my own child! You know? Don't tell anybody but i kinda get jealous on how much of attention my wife put on them cause like,does she like them more then me?!! That's unacceptable hmfp"

Yeah and things like that was really fun too

But that day you couldn't saved him

You tried.. But unfortunately it didn't worked

Miles was devastated..you felt so guilty every day for not being able to save his dad but you always comforted him whenever he need it and he is very grateful for that

If you thought you were nobody under your hero mask you are sorely mistaken! You are everything to Miles,you are his hero

it's been sometime since that happened and everything seems to be okay

Until now

It was a random night you were patrolling the city when you ended up realizing that you were close to where Miles lived

It wouldn't hurt anyone to take a look would it?

But the last thing you expected to see was this

And this i mean

Prowler on the rooftop at Miles building

[•••]

What if he is planning to hurt Miles? You couldn't let that happen, could you?

You were ready to attack him sneakily but his mask came off

Curious to know who your unbearably annoying enemy is you decided to wait a while

Then..you saw him!Miles Morales was the Prowler,and he wasn't alone..Aaron was with him

You were surprised! Who wouldn't tbh

You decided to stay a little longer to see what he is going to do:

- Miles..we will finally catch that spider,i can feel it.- said Aaron

- Yeah,i can't wait for that Tio (uncle) Aaron

You noticed that Aaron seemed to be hesitant to tell Miles something,then he said:

- Look Miles,they.. could be anyone -you thought to yourself "does he know I'm the spider hero!?-

- What are you trying to say?

- I'm trying to say that - he hesitates one more time - don't forget why we are doing all this ok? Mi hermano (my brother) ..Your dad, está muerto (is dead) because that "hero" couldn't save him,they saved everyone but couldn't bother to save him and - Before Aaron could say more Miles interrupt him

- I know tio,don't worry - his mask returns to his face - esta noche(tonight)..I'm gonna kill that spider

You know what he said

You know what he is planning to do

Miles..the boy you love

Is going to kill you

[•••]

You are on the edge of the building

The only thing keeping you from falling is Prowler

He got his claws ready to kill you

Your heart is beating fast

"I don't want to die! I can't die yet! I don't want to get killed by him! Miles please!"you thought:

- Who are you?

- I... - he moves his claws closer to your face

With his claws he slowly takes off your mask

When he took the mask off you ,tears rolled down from your eyes

That look of fear and your watery eyes

Made Miles heart break

"This wasn't supposed to happen"

Miles thought

"Why is this happening?":

- Miles.. - you said whispering looking at him

Miles is feeling a lot of emotions

He is scared

He is angry

He is confused

And he is sad

Miles face is revealed

You see a tear fall down from his eye:

- Amor.. - you can hear by his voice that he is hurt

He don't want to do this,he can't do this!

But still

Miles doesn't let go of you:

- Miles..look i know why you are doing this! And i swear my love i really tried to save him!

"My love" he loves when you call him that,you always call him with so full of love on your voice that always make he feels warm

But is he feeling warm now that you are calling him? With so much despair trying to prove your point?

He close his eyes for a second and looked away as if he was trying to ignore you:

- Please! The fact that i couldn't save him still hunts me..Look at me Miles

He looked at you

More tears fall down from your eyes:

- The hardest thing about this job is that you can't save everybody..It took me a while to accept this but it's the truth

It took a while to accept this? That made Miles wonders if you even asked to be a hero at all

He loosens his grip a little

You wanted to tell him everything

How much it hurts you to be a hero

But you keep it to yourself:

- I know it hurts Miles,i know you want to kill me but please..Those people - you you looked around - they need me..let me do for them what i couldn't do for you

He moves his claws close to your face

You look deep into his eyes and said:

-Please..if you find a little sympathy in your heart.. forgive me for everything- you said honestly - I love you Miles

you shut your eyes and...

[•••]

Please be patient cause this fanfic will have a ending!! Thank you for reading ♡

[yannig]

I need someone to theorize with me about the Pit Babe 2 trailer

Ok so I thought a lot about Tony and Way being back. And I think we've got 3 options, ranked in how likely I think they are to actually happen.

They are actually alive (faked their death, resurrected, or maybe even clones/evil twins).

They are ghosts/spirits/whatever. They are there but still dead.

They are not here at all. All of their apparitions are due to nightmares, hallucinations, paranoia, flashbacks, etc.

I am entirely uninterested in them being actually alive, one way or another. I think this is largely the most underwhelming option out of the 3, and yet also the one we're most likely to get. For me, Tony and Way being back from the dead would just negate most of the impact of the first season.

Oh Way sacrificed himself to save Charlie as an attempt to redemption? Yeah no he's still alive actually. Tony was finally put done by the son he always treated like a dog, and who at last managed to escape his hold? Nope, he survived.

Talk about a way to undo major character moments. (I hated Way's death, but it was still an important character moment. and Kenta turning on Tony was great.)

(for Way as his own character, it could actually be interesting. Like "yeah no, you don't get to just die and be done with the guilt. you actually have to work for redemption". but 1) I don't think it's where they're going; and 2) I'm not convinced it would stem interesting development for anyone else.)

The ghost option could be fun, I guess. I don't really have an opinion either way tbh, depends where they go with it. Ghost possession could be a fun threat.

I know what my favorite option is, and it's definitely n°3, which sadly I don't think we will get. Mind you, Babe would be perfectly justified to have nightmares or flashbacks about these 2, considering how much trauma they gave him. Also Way giving Babe trauma flashbacks might help me forgive what they did to his character. But well. The show hasn't seemed very interested in talking about trauma before so...

Basically, I think the most interesting option is for the show to toy with its characters' (and its viewers') paranoia, by leaving all 3 options open for as long as possible. Done well, it could make for a very good thriller.

Are they actually back or is Babe just hallucinating in broad daylight? Are they actually vengeful ghosts that need warding against or is Babe just having very justified nightmares? Is there a threat at all or are they all just paranoiac after everything that happened? Is it really paranoia if they're really after you? They all thought Charlie was dead, didn't they? Does anyone ever stay dead?

I'd argue that if that thriller part is done well, all 3 options could work as compelling endings. I also don't think (from the writing in season 1) that they could pull it off effectively.

Or even that they would try. Season 1 wasn't a thriller in the first place, and the S2 trailer isn't giving thriller either. My problem being: I'm not really interested by their return if it doesn't turn thriller.

Basically, what I'm interested in is what impact their return would have on the other characters, after thinking they were finally safe. Especially Kenta and Babe. Kenta who finally escaped, finally managed to turn on Tony, to get free from him. Babe who is finally safe after spending the last 10 years looking over his shoulder, after so many betrayals, after loosing his best friend in all possible ways, after thinking his boyfriend was dead. Imagine how terrifying the prospect of Tony's return would be.

But beyond that? I have no interest in what they would do as independent characters. Tony has plans? What does it change from S1? Way is being an idiot, either working for the villain or clumsily trying to earn his redemption? I don't care. That is the exact same thing they were doing in S1.

Basically, I'm afraid that by bringing them back, the show is just being lazy and re-creating the S1 status-quo instead of imagining new stakes. And I am entirely uninterested in sequels that just undo the original story's ending. Which is exactly what I'm afraid they'll do.

TLDR: the psychological impact of the potentiality of Tony and Way being back is much more interesting than them actually being back.

Sure, give me confirmed omega characters (Jeff and Kenta at least), give me AlanJeff and BabeCharlie being cute together, give me Sonic and North finally getting somewhere and maybe involving Kim (or aro/ace/aspec Kim, that would also work, but only if explicitly stated in the show), give me heats and mpreg and stop being cowards. I'll watch it for the relationships between the main cast if nothing else.

But I'm worried about what the big conflict is going to be.

[anonymous-dentist]

Hello I was wondering, what are your reasons for voting for forever? Asking because I can’t decide who to vote for lol

WHY TO VOTE FOR FOREVER:

Lore Museum to help people catch up so they don’t feel left out. This helps encourage creators to return to the server after being gone for a while

PvP Arena (think Fit’s boxing ring) to give non-rp focused people something fun to do. It’s enrichment! :D

If you’ve seen Empires SMP or Limited Life, you may have noticed that everyone is wearing armor, but you can still see their skins. That’s an armor mod, and it’s one of the mods that Forever (and Cellbit, rip) want to add

Once upon a time a month ago or so, Forever mentioned that he’d probably invite a Spanish-speaking person onto the server as his +1 because he feels like there should be more of them. That’s cool! :D

He’s FOREVER!! He’s done so much to help the island already. Look at NINHO! That thing has saved so many eggs from permadeath, it isn’t even funny.

And he’s doing this all to spy on the Federation. He accepts the risks of brainwashing and everything, but he’s doing this because he wants people off the island. He’ll be cooperating, yeah, because he has to, but he’s still a key part of the Ordo

So the rp storyline potential there is HUGE! A betrayal arc, a spy arc, a corruption arc, infighting between Insaneduo again, infighting between the favela five + richas, infighting between drama trio!!!, being forced to work with the Codes, it’s crazy!!!

Most of the other candidates haven’t really had anything that grabbed me tbh:

Bad’s entire thing is not becoming president and he wants an egg council, but wouldn’t that just put the eggs at further risk? And other than that, I haven’t really seen any other campaign promises out of him

Felps is only running because he, like Cellbit was, is meant to act as a meatshield in case anyone got too assassination happy. He’s kinda just doing it for fun, too, and that’s fine, but yk.

Etoiles’ campaign and narrative potential are SUPER GOOD, but, to me, it all just chalks up to “I will give people armor and do more dungeons”, which is super cool and all and I’d love to see him step into power as the Federation’s number one enemy rn, but Forever kinda just grabbed me more?

And Mike is actually my second choice. I like all his ideas, and I think he deserves it, but genuinely Forever got me more through his campaign speeches. He just sounded so genuine that I was like. Huh. Vote Insaneduo!

[goforth-ladymidnight]

@suckerpunchfemale asked: For the WIP game, The Never-Fading Flower. I'm so curious about your take on Amarantha!

I tried to save a draft of my answer for this tag game, and the whole ask disappeared. 😭

This is one of those “I have so many ideas but I have yet to put my pen to paper” WIPs I have, but at least it has a dedicated document! I have random sentences, ideas, and a couple of songs chosen to fit the vibe once I finally start writing it.

Essentially, I think there's more to Amarantha’s character than her obsession with Tamlin. We don’t know much about her, other than she was the King of Hybern’s general, she had a sister named Clythia, and she was good friends with Tamlin’s dad. There is so much fun to be had with her character! (Villains are always fun to write; for anyone wondering, I’m not condoning her actions, and it’s a shame I feel I have to say that.)

SJM only shows us the “she’s not that hot”, Tamlin-crazed, bored-with-power Amarantha. I’m more interested in the Amarantha who may have been passed over for the crown of Hybern in favor of her cousin; who probably fell in love with a certain High Lord of Spring until he met his mate and married her without warning; who avenged herself on her sister’s killer, only to be stripped of her title as general in response to the King losing the War and then being left with nothing.

To be clear, I’m not interested in writing about the Amarantha who is widely considered to be a pedophile. In my version, I imagine that Amarantha fell in love with her best friend, the future High Lord of Spring. She thought she was going to marry him and become Lady of the Spring Court herself one day, only for him to find his mate shortly thereafter and marry her. He is described in canon as fickle and vicious, after all. Can you imagine her hurt, and the betrayal? That is something worth exploring, in my opinion.

Tamlin is often headcanoned as inheriting his mother’s green eyes and blonde hair, but I imagine he looks an awful lot like his father. I imagine that Amarantha, in her own twisted way, didn’t start coming onto him until he became High Lord after his father passed. I even have a theory that Amarantha is the one responsible for arranging an attack on Rhysand’s family, but she didn’t expect Tamlin’s father to die as a result.

Which leads to her obsession with Tamlin. She’s already lost her crown, her sister, her title, and her best friend/ex-lover. She’s not going to lose Tamlin, too. But he only knows her as his father’s friend and emissary. He is repulsed by her sudden shift in attitude towards him, and he wants nothing more to do with her. Canonically, she “eventually grew to desire [him]--to lust for him with her entire wicked heart”. If he had actually been groomed by her from a young age, he might have been more inclined to give in to her demands.

I’m still working on the timeline, especially since I want this to feel like Amarantha’s POV of everything went down, but I’m probably going to condense some things. For example, I want Tamlin’s and Rhysand’s family’s deaths to be the trigger that sets the rest of Amarantha’s plans into motion. Drugging the High Lords, attending the ball where she curses Tamlin and his Court, taking over Prythian...

Anyway, that’s what I have so far! I don’t know how long it will be or when I’ll write it, but my goal is to have it done by the end of the year.

Thanks for asking!

[wuxiaphoenix]

Movie Review: Beyond the Mask

I’m rating Beyond the Mask (2015) a firm 3.5 stars out of 5, and classing it as a solid B movie. If you want an afternoon or evening’s entertainment, with a fun look at the setting of the American Revolution, you might check this out. One of the high points of the movie is their portrayal of Benjamin Franklin, as evinced in this exchange.

“I am looking for Benjamin Franklin. Are you he?”

“Well, that depends. Do I owe you money?”

Yes, if you’ve read up on Ben, this is spot on. He was an inventor and a printer and had half a dozen other businesses... and plenty of them didn’t work out, leaving creditors to dodge. To say nothing of outraged husbands!

So, yes. Genius, inventor, quick to size up a situation, with a dry wit - they got Ben Franklin right. Yay!

Now, is the movie historically accurate? *Cough, chuckle* Noooot so much. It’s an adventurous what-if drawn off a few interesting historical facts and some gaslamp fantasy. You know, along the line of the show Jack of All Trades. That comedy was based on actual history of the newly-formed U.S. and Britain allying against France at one point. So, for this movie - the British East India Company existed, had agents provocateurs, and a vested and ruthless interest in being able to do business in the Colonies on their favored terms. And there was an assassination attempt on General Washington in New York. Everything else is historical fiction. That’s not the problem.

Or, actually, problems. There are two big ones in this movie. First and more generally, pacing. There needed to be a few more breather moments so the viewer could get the full impact from, say, a bomb being placed, or a Sudden Betrayal. As it was I ended up pausing the video to give myself the breather when the movie didn’t.

Second... was the handling of religion. And that was the characters getting too much “light in the eyes shining through the hole in the back of the head” whenever the subject came up. I think this is a failure of the modern imagination. Writers and actors can’t seem to put themselves in the mindset of the times. And the reality of that mindset, for the majority of people, was that God exists. Fact. The sun comes up in the east, night is dark, if your head is forced underwater you’re going to drown. There’s no reason to go empty-eyed and thoughtlessly virtue-preaching over something as fundamental as the law of gravity.

It could have been done better. Especially the whole bit about trying to “earn” redemption - I honestly think William (our ex-spy) was doing the best he could to save lives with the information he had available. Who could he trust to not be in the Company’s pockets?

All told, the movie was still entertaining. We need more Revolutionary fiction!

Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HlyWBhWjWfk

Movie: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nBymbRqkxuU

[andorerso]

tell me your every errant thought on survivor pretty pretty please

OKAY everything that comes to mind in no particular order (and under a cut for spoilers)

the whole thing with Bode was so heartbreaking 😭 I saw the betrayal coming when he started acting weird, but I did not expect him to be a Jedi, and I definitely let out a gasp when he used the force against Cal

I understand what they were going for with him, but I'm not sure I was a fan of it. I think he genuinely cared about Cal, and the fact that he didn't even pause for a second in the end, even when his actions were actively putting Kata at risk... like yeah, I get that was the point but I just kinda wish he had a moment of clarity or something.

I have to say though, Kata putting her doll on his burning body was the saddest damn thing I ever saw. I also loved her lullaby (but that ending was unsatisfying I'm sorry)

okay, moving on from all that mess, fuck. the. force tears. seriously. ESPECIALLY the parkour ones. fuck them! there was no reason to make them so difficult 😭 I've finished the main storyline and all of the planets besides Jedha, so I'm dreading what more force tears I'll have to deal with because some of the ones on Koboh were already kicking my ass. I mean I finished them all in the end, but holy hell, the one with all the ziplines made me turn off the game without saving

I can't believe they didn't let BD jump into chests anymore!! outrageous

okay, enough negatives, I DID like this game. the semi open-world was nice, I'm glad they didn't go full open-world with this but having a little space to explore Koboh freely was definitely fun

the outfits. no notes, 10/10. Cal Kestis, fashion king (right after Cassian of course) I loved designing different outfits for every planet, and then matching BD to it <3

so I mentioned previously that I didn't really connect to Greez in Fallen Order (no hate, I was just kinda neutral) but I actually really liked him in this one! idk what changed, if it was just a growing fondness after spending more time with him or what, but I'm glad I was able to appreciate him more

I also loved Merrical. that first kiss moment was really nice <3

Cameron Monaghan is honestly so incredible in this role. couldn't have asked for a better Cal.

live slug reaction. gay. incredible.

when Cal embraces his dark side, and the level up menu goes all red instead of blue.... oof. that did hit me a bit, it was a nice touch.

the fact that Cere was so close to beating Vader 😭😭 that whole fight was so great, and lmao at him being set on fire again afdsgfdsgf

I love that they gave us so many different lightsaber stances and even a blaster! I mean I locked down on my favorite at the beginning and didn't use anything else lmao, but still, I love having the choice

Cal working with Saw!! and Saw being impressed by him, I know that's right. also here's my thesis on Cal meeting Jyn -

[barelymaddy]

Pick a card:General message 💫What do you need to know right now?

Pile 1 Pile 2 Pile 3

`~°•○●○•°~`~°•○●○•°~`~°•○●○•°~`~°•○●

Pile 1

Ok,so I see that you've been grieving after something for a long time now,and the Universe wants you to know that it's ok to take a break from time to time and have fun.(This might be specific for someone here) but if you are grieving after a person,their spirit wants you to know that they only wished the best for you and they want you to enjoy the time you have left here on Earth,not spend your days in constant suffering. Of course,you can deal with sadness the way you feel it's right.But,you've got some opportunities coming your way and sooner or later you'll have to come out of your shell.I also see that you might be a bit stubborn,so there is a need here for you to think outside the box for once or see the situation in a new light.Try to be a bit more optimistic, because someone out there will always be on your side,no matter how missunderstood you might feel.Also,try and reconnect with your friends,I feel like you might have distanced yourself from the people close to you because of the tragic event,and they are very worried about you.Remember:Don't be afraid to be happy!~

Additional messages: cinnamon,purple,mother,hippie,red hair,graveyard,garden,house,the sun,legacy,bee

Song:

Pile 2

Alright,so I see that there is this person in your life who is probably male and older(but doesn't have to be) who is quite greedy and tyrannical.I feel like they enjoy to put you down,and you need to distance yourself from them ASAP.I feel like you see the act of pleasing them as your duty,but that is not true.The only one you HAVE to please is yourself.You might be the type to work hard,even to the point of burnout.And this person likes to take credit for your work.Spirit is asking you to try and step into your power and put aside some money,in case you live with them.You will be much more happier once you are free of them.Also,you will receive the rewards for your hard work and they will get their karma sonner or later.Also,you might have another older male friend/relative who sees your struggle and wants to help you get out.You can trust them(spirit is telling me that you have trust issues).The Universe got your back,you are not alone!~

Additional messages: sibling,work,cabin,hunting,stag,uncle,shotgun, older daughter,Delia,embroidery

Song:

Pile 3

Ok,so I'm seeing that right now you might be in a conflict with somebody,and even though you know you are right,the people seem to support the other person.They might be one of your closest friends.Now,I don't know the situation but for some of you,this person might not actually want to be fighting with you,and this whole conflict is caused by miscommunication that you will need to sort out in order to save this friendship,which seems to go really deep.You two need to start seeing eye to eye,and realize that you don't have to agree on everything in order to be friends.For others,there is this person who actually believes you and got your back but for some reason they are hiding it.They might be a really influential person.In both cases,you need to gather some people who you can call close and go out with them,talk it out and rest for a bit,because this conflict seems to really tire you out and has a major effect on your mental health.Remember to take more care of yourself!~

Additional messages:Gemini,smart person,childhood,betrayal,golden,sports

Song:

That's it,I hope you enjoyed!~I know they are really specific but choose what fits best your situation.These are general readings and might not be for everyone.Also,if you felt triggered by anything I mentioned in the piles,I'm deeply sorry and know that it does get better!🤍

(Here are some cats I thought were cute)

[theflytecharm]

YEAH in this au marcias like that is my baby brother no I've never actually been able to physically touch him yes he is from medieval times. I don't see what this has to do with anything. She'd be so offended that any version of herself could ever be mean to him. They r besties who tell each other everything (or. Marcia tells Most things but she does see marcellus very much as a child bc he. Is. She's like 20 when he's maybe 10 so she doesn't tell him Everything but they're super close) and when he ends up in the future she introduces him to everyone as her little cousin from overseas who's parents r dead so he's staying with her. She does tell alther who he actually is tho bc alther figured out where she was disappearing to not long after the start of her apprenticeship and asked her abt it and she didn't want to lie to him,,, she didn't tell him Who she was talking to just that it was a friend and she wasn't at any risk of going through the glass.

And. Yeah <33 they r autistic. Together 😌😌 marcellus knows some basic magyk in this au and marcia knows some physik and a lot of the theory of alchemy. Also I should clarify marcellus stays in the future in this au. He never goes home ever he just lives in the future now,, things in the past play out mostly the same as in canon but marcellus's role is played by a different alchemist who isn't such close friends with julius so there's some suspicion that the alchemy disaster wasn't entirely the alchemists fault and that's why alchemy isn't Quite so hated in the future.

Marcellus being more argumentative!! I think in canon he would have stayed quiet just bc. He wouldn't have seen a way out. Like etheldredda is essentially unkillable and if he ever dares to act out what happened to his sisters could happen to him. But with marcias influence he kind of starts pushing boundaries and asking questions and sneaking around and stealing things because marcias optimism rubs off on him and he's sure that he'll be able to save his sister this time, definitely. If things get really bad he can run away with the money from stolen items. I have a lot of thoughts abt marcellus and etheldredda and maybe one day I'll even elaborate on them abdjdbdjbd

AND. YEAH marcia does get affected by marcellus also <3 ur right she is a lot more tolerant of ppl in general tbh like especially after marcellus is in the future. If she can handle a grieving 13 yr old she can handle anything. She's also a lot more polite?? Like marcellus was taught Court Rules since he was tiny and started teaching them to marcia just for fun and obviously most of them r incredibly outdated but the same principles apply so while she is still bitchy and rude she is bitchy and rude in such a way that no one can ever call her out on it. Most of the time. Sometimes she snaps <3 Maybe she comes across a little old fashioned sometimes but that only adds to the effect,, she has learned Social Skill and by god is she going to use it.

There's also the fact that she considers marcellus her brother + has decided to honour his older bio sister by doing her absolute best to take care of him. When he's in the past this is 100% just talking with him and trying to give advice and steer him away from trouble (she fails miserably on that) and when he's in the future she's a lot more involved,, unfortunately (for her) this means she has a Big Sister Mode that activates every time she sees someone younger than her having a bad time and she HATES it bc all the castle kids literally love her and r bugging her all the time. Anyway I do have more to say but maybe I'll make an actual post with a readmore instead of putting it in ur inbox abdjdnsjfn

I love this au, it's so cute to see marcellus being looked after for once lmao

I wanna see the grown up pair of them start working together on alchemy and magyk too, kinda like julius but without the whole blame and betrayal bit. Alchemy being suspicious but not outright banned is fun too, would it end up being treated kinda like witches are (though with the bonus of hopefully less kidnapping involved)? Or more accepted than that

Marcellus having marcias influence and a way out is v interesting, in the canon it does seem like his only way out is to outlast etheldredda so he puts so much effort into a tincture that actually works. But if he's out would he put so much time and effort into it? Or just let it be and get on with a normal length life this time?

I love Social Skill marcia, she's such a person to learn the rules to break the rules (or bend the rules to breaking point without actually breaking them, leaving room for plausible deniability). I can also see them researching Why different rules and etiquette exist just so they understand why people do what they do, even if it's old stuff that's not really relevant anymore

BIG SISTER MARCIA!!!!! she's such a softie <3

Does marcellus get a chance to grieve his sisters in the past? Not even as in a funeral or something, but did he just have to pretend it's all fine until he got out?

[aeniqmata]

List of Misc Headcanons

Storms or Clear Skies?

Storms for sure. Never mind that he can absolutely use the storms to cover his tracks and make sure that no one knows that he may or may not have been in or near the premises. But storms have a way of calming him, the noise and everything is just something he’s always loved since he was a kid even though he didn’t have anywhere to stay.

Describe a physical action that shows complete trust.

Given that Therion doesn’t show much of himself to anyone, there are a lot of them. But the serious one is that Therion tends to avoid eye contact with people that he really trusts. Because trusting people means that he’s opened part of his soul to them, it's oftentimes easier for these people to look at him and know when he’s feeling something. So he keeps his eyes away from theirs so they can’t call him out on something, especially when they are around other people that might not have that same perk.

Describe a verbal way they would express complete trust.

Stuttering. Therion could lie out of just about anything if he wanted to, but given his almost non-existent interpersonal skills, telling the truth and to someone that he’s given so much of himself already, it makes him incredibly nervous.

Where is the most unusual place they’ve fallen asleep at?

Therion has absolutely taken naps in the middle of the mansions that he’s robbed. Call it a stupid thrill, but he always finds that they have too many rooms and that people hardly ever look in all of them. Watching the rounds of the guards means that he can take a well-needed rest in a too plush bed, and when he’s found himself well-rested and fully aware of his surroundings again he will finish the job.

Other than B&E, Therion has found that large trees are a good place to sleep if one is traveling alone. Most creatures that are aggressive are too large to climb trees, and those that are small enough to climb either leave him be or he can make it readily apparent that he is not a target they should pursue. If he can find a branch that holds his not significant weight, then he should be ok.

Have they ever dabbled in drugs? If so, what kinds?

 -  There is a bit of a yes and a no. Has he done drugs, absolutely, but not because he wanted to. Post betrayal there was a whole lot of physical damage that had to heal and Therion was in a lot of pain. But of course he had plenty of money from previous heists where he’d saved his cut of it, and he was not at all ashamed to dip into his savings to buy some strange poultice off someone if it promised to dim his senses or put him under for a while. But when he started running out of money to support both that and his staying in inns, he turned to actually crafted drugs that would dull the pain so he could get back to work. It would be how he picked up his habit of staking out places for long times before making a move.

Therion’s dependency on them at one point in his life has made him avoid any and all medications that he could. No apothecaries and nothing that would dull his senses. But the habits he picked up while on them would continue, namely, the only picking wealthy targets with high priced items that he could sell for an extreme price.

Something my muse loves and never gets tired of.

If we are doing wholesome things, it’s seeing kids doing cool things with their parents. Therion himself has never had any, and what childhood he had was spent being used to steal things that Darius was too big to get to. In a way, it was kinda something cool with his parent but the whole memory is soured by what happened between them. These kids actually enjoying their lives before they become adults and have to worry about things is great, and if there is a way to keep your valuables safe from him it’s to give them to your small children because they don’t need to be taken from, they’ll get fucked over my life later so they should have fun now.

Less wholesome… seeing the look on someone’s face when they realize their letter or ill-gotten goods are gone. They panic and blame everyone around them instead of the traveler that is happily paying for some food thing at another stall. Being that Therion only steals from the rich who can stand to lose some ( because everything else is no longer worth his skills ) he never feels bad about their panic. Had they come across something by reasonable means he would have left it, but something that was stolen from another who’d been sold the item isn’t ok. Greedy people aren’t worthy of his generosity, he finds.

What is your muse’s favorite time of year?

Of all the seasons, fall is definitely his favorite. It’s cool enough for him to wander around and not worry about looking odd with his shawl poncho and nevermind that there are caramel apples and other sweet goodies on the streets during all of that season. It’s the one time a year where he loiters in cities so he can have his fill of all the things that come from the harvests and its when he tends not to steal as much. Chances are the things he plans on stealing are going to still be there when the winter hits and he bundles up more because cold weather is not nice on all his healed joints and scars. Also, people seem happier in the fall time? So it's just nice all around, its why he likes it.

Something that makes my muse happy.

Believe it or not, he does enjoy sitting and reading quite a bit. Therion spends a lot of his time alone, so when he does find a book that he genuinely enjoys he’ll sit out in nature and reads most of one when he’s waiting for the time for one of his jobs to happen. When he’s done with one he’ll just drop it in some merchant’s stall or leave it in a tavern for someone else to pick up and read. The silence is the nicest thing about it, just the ability to sit and listen to the nature that often times he can’t hear in the cities where he works.

He absolutely won’t be telling this to any of his party mates either.

[taigertea]

mental vs physical conflict

I noticed and thought was interesting was how the main conflict for Kotetsu and Barnaby seem to contrast, Barnaby having more explicitly mental conflicts and issues while Kotetsu’s primarily is more physical.

The crux of Barnaby main conflict in the series comes from Barnaby unable to let go of the mystery of who murdered his parents and the memory manipulation by Maverick. Even in Rising, we see his past history called back and referred to by Lunatic, to which Kotetsu needs to explain that Barnaby isn’t just magically healed, it’s a conflict he’s still healing from and that the death of his parents’ murderer isn’t going to fix that, especially considering how deep that betrayal goes. Further emphasized in season 2 in a more progressive/healing way when we see Barnaby picking up hobbies and making friends, especially a friend who comes from a time before everything upended itself in his life.

What’s even more interesting is that Barnaby’s conflict is always much more explicitly stated. It’s basically the main conflict of season 1. As mentioned, Rising has Lunatic calling it out and Virgil as a direct parallel. Then season 2 has the whole Subaru and Yuri scenes. Not to mention how it became something forcibly aired out to the public during the Jake fights. It ties in an interesting way to me that Barnaby is more open about verbally showing his inner heart to Kotetsu than Kotetsu is to Barnaby, and is more emotional too. I think he’s even more open to his friends than Kotetsu is. We actually see him hanging out and talking to Mattia and asking for help quite a bit, like with asking to bring Kaede over to show the lab and asking for advice on Thomas. Kotetsu and Antonio as a parallel, we don’t see them having as deep conversations. We get Kotetsu lending an ear to Antonio and the reference to Tomoe, but they’ve known each other for so long that lots of words don’t seem necessary and their friendship works in a different way it feels like.

Moving on to Kotetsu, of course, there’s definitely a heavy mental toll placed on him, but his main conflicts are expressed in the series as being too old and washed up starting as early as season 1 (honestly, probably as a result of mental strain brought on by the loss of his wife and inability to juggle his work and family) and an even greater emphasis on potentially being unable to keep up physically with the loss of his powers. Rising also puts this front and center of Kotetsu not being worth keeping in Schneider’s eyes. Part of the resolution of Kotetsu’s conflict comes from figuring out that he should be learning how to time his abilities better, saving it until the final moment with Virgil. Season 2 in how it shows more of how Kotetsu’s become physically capable with some direct parallels to Season 1 (saving Kaede). Even in private, we see Kotetsu “practicing” yoga. In general, we don’t see him flubbing around much if at all, leaving out what happens in the opening of the first episode.

In the opposite way of how Barnaby was more open in explaining his past to Kotetsu, you gotta pry shit out of Kotetsu with a crowbar. Which is fitting when most of his conflict deals more with the physical compared to the mental. Kotetsu never super willingly offers up information about himself in the series. No one knows Kotetsu has a family until the mayor’s kid. Barnaby and Kotetsu fight because Kotetsu didn’t trust him to restrain himself against Jake. The ironic bit is that Kotetsu needs to tell a lie to defeat Jake (even though it was all hinged on trust). S1 part 2, Kotetsu not explaining that his powers were declining (that one fun fact about Muramasa having to distract Kotetsu to get him to talk because Kotetsu’s so LIKE THAT). Not telling Kaede that he’s a hero. Rising where he doesn’t tell Barnaby that Schneider fired him. Even S2 we have him trying to reassure others when Barnaby’s in a coma! (God Kotetsu having secrets has so much evidence, wtf).

Honestly, not sure how to conclude this since it was more just a theme than something I can really put significant meaning to. I think it’s an interesting story telling method to watch unfold, because you almost have to switch your brain a bit looking at Barnaby’s development versus Kotetsu’s. We hear a lot of Barnaby’s changes through dialogue while we almost are shown Kotetsu’s (which is another funny layer when you consider Barnaby having shit eyesight and Kotetsu using 100 power to enhance his hearing). Just think it’s neat how their conflicts contrast and if we’ll be seeing more of this in the second cour or get a sudden reversal.

Disclaimer: And of course, not saying that Barnaby doesn’t have physical conflicts or that Kotetsu doesn’t have mental ones, but just that the big overarching stuff seems to have a focus.

Side note: I wrote all the examples of Kotetsu like not spilling his heart out unless it’s talking about hero things and he’s basically -

[ladyluscinia]

izzy is white and participated in colonial violence against his indigenous friend/co-worker/whatever. he actively executed that colonial violence for his own means so he could have ownership over ed. how is ed cutting his toe off any worse than that?

I assume this is referring to this post?

So first, anon, I want you to take a second and reflect on why you feel like the logical response here is to rationalize how a man could morally deserve his boss permanently mutilating him and feeding him his own toe.

And then I want you to stop asking yourself that because it's insane, it's absurd, and mainly because this is completely the wrong show for either of us to be taking that question seriously. Or your original "how is this worse than that?", for that matter.

The point of the toe scene isn't to prompt us all to start digging into the nitty gritty of every interaction and implication and power dynamic present between Edward and Izzy and try to figure out who the real victim / bad guy is here. It's a shocking escalation that makes doing that ridiculous, and lampshades it if you try anyway. We were already skipping around the absurd situation line when Izzy's betrayal was undone in 24 hours by mugging a guy for a dinghy, and that just puts us firmly past it.

And in this kind of show it can be a really good decision to make a situation too absurd to approach realistically.

I'll put this under a cut because it got very long, but I am actually trying to explain how in-universe handwaviness is a good and fascinating thing, and why you might want to excuse a character from narrative consequences (and how that's different from excusing them from character growth).

---

So to start, handwaviness is normal in OFMD. This is because some narrative consequences are fun and interesting to play out - Izzy's rising frustration and tragic drama playing out in the background cumulating in a great raising of stakes and proper arc set up for Edward - and some narrative consequences suck and / or are boring - actually making Stede and Edward get stuck working for the King of England. So if you do it right you can explore the good bits and drop the bad ones without the audience going "Hey wait a second! That was way too easy." And adding a character level just makes things more complicated.

Outside of Edward and Izzy's everything, the character situations are a mess if we start bringing in consequences. Stede's entire crew save Buttons, Oluwande, and Jim wanted to murder him in episode 1. Jim tried to kill Lucius in episode 2 (while Stede wasn't very concerned by his potential loss), and Edward pulled off a much better attempted murder in 10. Buttons and Roach were actively trying to murder and cannibalize The Swede after Edward abandoned everyone but Jim and Frenchie to die, and the whole crew including Fang and Ivan also tied Izzy to an anchor and were seconds from murdering him. Given all that, how many of these people should honestly just never be in a room together again? For personal safety if nothing else?

Hell, even if your defense is that most of these situations were played for laughs - which they were and I love the mutinies in particular - there's still a glaring exception in Edward trying to kill Lucius. That was right in the middle of the "serious" set of actions that showed Izzy's scenes, so we're going to have to treat it similarly if we don't want the bad kind of dissonance... which you also get if the toe scene gets handwaved but Izzy threatening Edward is treated as serious harm. All three of these are linked. Either being sorry is enough for them all or it isn't, and I would not want to be the writer who had to figure out how to reckon with the long lasting effects of traumatic harm committed by someone you thought was a friend while in a romcom.

If we treat all of these things as serious, are amends even possible? Much less amends that can be carried out with destroying the lighter tone of the show? What about the people around them? What kind of person does it make Stede if he forgives / accepts Edward's treatment of Izzy and Lucius even if they don't? Even if Izzy doesn't realize it was fucked up in the first place (which is now less a funny masochism joke and more a giant red flag for abuse)? And Edward's marooning of the crew wasn't treated as seriously as the rest at the time, but can we really keep stretching handwaviness to cover that if Lucius is being treated as an actual victim right next to them?

And while I'm sure plenty of people would say that Izzy's situation is different because he's the antagonist, he's also an antagonist who has been treated with a lot of nuance and caution. If he becomes the sole member of the cast who is actually considered guilty of his own actions it will be fucked up, and that has some yikes implications too seeing as our main protagonist is a rich white guy who is getting to benefit from handwaviness around race. (Check the notes on that 2nd one too because there were multiple interesting threads.)

Protagonist centered morality gets very unfunny very fast if your protagonists start becoming hypocrites with wildly unpleasant implications.

For all of these reasons, it is a far better decision for the show to continue its policy of excusing unwanted narrative consequences as soon as it's reasonable - via keeping situations absurd enough to pull it off - and that includes letting Izzy off the hook as soon as he learns his lesson. Because this deliberately written and genre embedded handwavy approach is not the same thing as just blanket excusing a character.

I mentioned this in passing in my original post (to keep it short lol) and elaborated in the tags so I'll just pull those here:

Narrative consequences that lead to character growth are the fun and interesting kind. You don't wave those off. You want to explore them.

This is why despite the extensive collection of fix-it fics, fanart, jokes, etc. I doubt most fans would be satisfied if Stede shows up next season, kisses Edward, and all the events of episode 10 are forgotten. That would be a retcon, not a resolution. Edward has to face the narrative and go through the character arc that they've set him on, and he needs to get the development out of it. He just doesn't have to keep facing the consequences once they've done what they needed to.

He can regret throwing Lucius overboard, Lucius and the crew can forgive him, and they can all go right back to hanging out and shipping him with their captain. Hell, the comedy is dark enough they can make jokes about the attempted murder. But it won't make much sense to keep haunting him with it for the rest of his life, so I don't think they will.

Izzy? Is in a very similar boat.

He has to face first and foremost the toxicity in his relationship with Edward, and this will almost certainly necessitate addressing the racial elephant in the room if they do it right. That's the part where he figures out he fucked up and earnestly gets sorry about it.

The thing is after that bit, the logical progression is just making him behave better in the future. It would be weird and inconsistent if Izzy gets the character development but is still deemed "beyond forgiveness" somehow (ex: Edward being unwilling to mend their relationship while getting along with Lucius, or the writers never letting him out of the apology phase). They could maybe present it like racism is a special form of evil, but for Stede reasons that is a dangerous play on a thematic level (and also a bit fucked on a real life level, since they put so much effort into making Izzy nuanced presumably to make attaining racial awareness and growth feasible in the first place).

EDIT: While it's still possible they might be addressing some of Izzy's standard white guy race obliviousness, the confirmation that the anchor hoist scene wasn't intended to be a racially motivated decision very much pushes that out of the spotlight. He needs to address his and Edward's whole toxic mess, but it's now very possible that character growth skips over any race based dynamic because the writers haven't been including that as one of their problems.

So yeah... I will very easily excuse Izzy's actions if he gets the "I fucked up" arc right alongside Edward's, because I know I'm going to very easily excuse Edward's actions and it does not make any sense for me to hold these characters to different standards. The show can still explore themes and character growth despite the handwaviness - in fact in part because of it giving them a way to cleanly exit a serious tangent without having to be completely serious about it. This is deliberate. This is fascinating. And this is fun.

(And tbh I have already excused specifically the Navy plot both because of the toe thing and because it very rapidly dropped in significance as soon as Edward signed the Act of Grace. It no longer matters as a specific thing that was done so much as just one of the steps in the collapse of Edward and Izzy's relationship.)

Also, as a final note... As with literally anything in fiction, people are going to react to things differently. Just like there's people who can't watch this show at all because Stede Bonnet was a real slaveowner, there are people who will not consider Izzy redeemable or who will be unable to handwave his actions to the extent they will other characters'. And if the show does go through with character growth, there is a good chance they won't be satisfied with what they get. It happens. There's not really anything to be done about it.

[kenrik]

Strong v Weak

Just random notes/rambling again, since I really really reaallyyyy cannot expound/dive deep because I'm supposed to be focused on something else -- and this is just a way to relieve stress!! *kenrik pulls out hair*

It's pretty long rambling this time! Be sure you wanna click ahaha

I've mentioned this in a fic maybe. In a comment, a review, I don't know.

Another point about GoUta -

1. Gojo is a good, dependable person packaged in a bad personality.

Gojo can do anything. His character sheet says he doesn't get involved in a lot of things, because he's a master of everything he does.

Out of the strongest, he prides himself - he knows he is the strongest.

Basically, that character Gojo Satoru, he can do anything. As far as canon is concerned, there are four special grade sorcerers if I remember correctly. Additionally, you have the notable characters that Gojo identifies as definitively strong.

I'm thinking Geto, Yuki, Yuta, Hakari, those from the Zen'in too I guess.

Out of all these strong characters, what do they do? Geto - he forms himself a cult and kills nonsorcerers. Yuki - she's labeled as a good for nothing slacker who travels in search for a different solution to the issue of curses. And Hakari - he quits sorcery and runs a fighting den.

Gojo, who can do anything he sets his mind to. What does he choose to do? That guy chose to be a teacher. He chose to be a protector of the weak. Regardless of why, he chose to serve and protect the weak.

I don't know if this is appreciated enough.

Gojo could do anything. He has the riches, the looks, the power to do anything and everything. He could've turned and worked with Geto. Hell, he could've started his own cult and floored Geto's from the start. He could've been a trust fund baby, could've wasted away in luxury. He could do anything. Anything. But he doesn't. He sticks to his code of protecting the weak. Why is anyone's guess. My guess is that it's a point of pride with him; that his strength is everyone's salvation (like a true god on earth), that; and that he has a softness - as seen from Gege's past works. Maybe as a penance for failing to save Suguru, for not being there when his friend needed him most. He seems to really take pride in the fact that no one can touch him and in extension, those who matter to him.

In Ch. 65, he rushes to save Mei and Utahime. He acts rashly. He acted on impulse. Because I think Gege wants to show that Gojo treasures his friends. That's why you have the - you crying, utahime?! I think Gege put that to downplay Gojo's kindness. This is also why Gojo took it very bad - Geto's betrayal. Because this time - his power couldn't save him. He was a kid then, (teenager i guess, but i'm old so i'm calling him a kid) who's used to his power fixing all his problems. And this once, with Geto - he couldn't. It would be way easier if it was just another Toji, just another curse. But it wasn't. It was this man he respected who's become the monster.

Gojo is a very complex character whose motivations we may never truly know because JJK; it'll only be a story of a great battle if I understand correctly.

But the fact is, he is a good person, a dutiful man. That's why, entering into the fandom surprised me - because the fans keep painting him like an asshole and a dick. I don't get it when you have actual asshole characters like Naoya and the other members of the Zen'in clan... Ahahaha.

To me, Gojo's character is a fun-loving friend to his peers; he's a man who could do anything. And he chose to be a teacher. He chose to protect and support the next generation of sorcerers. He's a good egg packaged in a trash personality ahaha. He's basically a kind man who - in the true toxic masculinity shounen way - hides his emotions because emotion is weakness!!

This is why I ship him and Uta. Aside from the chemistry, I think he really is a good guy! :^) Everything he does has purpose. When he picks on Gakuganji, there's hate and spite there. When he does it do Utahime, there's a fondness there. He lets Yaga headlock him for heaven's sakes! I think he also doesn't let Utahime hit him whenever she retaliates to lord over her how much stronger he was than her... because that riles her up even more so... just him being a special brand of ass - just for her~ xD So hehe - Gojo is a highly complex, nuanced character not everyone will understand, by us, the readers, even his own friends in the story. :D

Second GoUta point -

2. Utahime is the only combatant (among the protagonists' group) that Gege's introduced who is definitively weak.

She is just a semi-first grade sorcerer.

I know Miwa always says she's useless. But she's just on her second year. She can very well reach first grade by Utahime's level; seeing how Atsuya is a first grade himself with the same technique as her.

So really, it's just Utahime who is shown as a weak character. She's had more than enough time in field, and yet; she's just a semi-first grade.

Without knowing her CT, without seeing her in battle, it is hard to confirm if she really is weak/useless. It is something the plot will spell out for us eventually. For now, we have Inumaki who is a semi-first grade. And he was arguably strong against Hanami, a special grade curse. So, I don't know how weak Utahime is if Toge's the benchmark for a semi-first grade's skill. But being a semi-first grade at Utahime's age, I don't think that's a point of pride. Instead, it shows how her skill is stagnant; it definitively shows that she lacks skill to get promoted.

Additionally, out of everyone - even the students - you have Nobara, Yuuji, and Maki who were all being recommended for first grade.

Everyone's surpassing Utahime. She is the only one who isn't getting stronger. She is the only one considered weak. Everyone seems to defend her. You have Gojo always looking out for her. You have Atsuya stepping in front of her. You have Nishimiya as her support.

And I find that peculiar. I find that odd.

In a manga where everyone's abilities are highlighted; where everyone's abilities are a point of pride - even Mei's who thought her CT was weak because all she could do was control crows. Mei; she learned; she developed the power to wield her axe; she became strong enough to be a first grade sorcerer.

Really doesn't make sense to me - that Utahime is labeled as weak. That Utahime is just a semi-first grade sorcerer given her experience.

So, I want to say that Utahime is weak by design. Utahime is a semi-first grade sorcerer because Gege's story needs her/wants her to be.

Why? Who knows?

I can only assume GoUta's written in somewhere there.

Strong v Weak is a recurring trope that Gege's dabbled with in his past works. Strong v Weak is a popular trope.

I'm certain that this is a trope Gege's excited to put his own twist to.

Maybe. Haha

Utahime is a shrine maiden. Her technique involves singing.

Shrine maidens - it's not a role cast randomly and willy-nilly. There is a lore there, a history with the character type. Linked to the gods. Possessed by gods. Can purify, exorcise, perform rituals, seal.

I like thinking that Utahime is weak because she needs to source her energy/her power. Like how Gakuganji's body is the medium/is the amplifier for his power; Utahime's the medium/vessel from which the power of gods/deities are channeled. Shrine maidens are known for performing rituals, it takes time to harness their power. They usually take from the power of their shrine and in extension, from the gods that they serve.

If her power is structured this way, it would make sense to me why Gojo sees her/thinks her as weak. Because unlike him who channels waves of energy - like Yuta who's just a bomb of insane levels of cursed energy; Utahime has to source her power elsewhere. Because she is just a medium/a vessel for the power of the deities. It also makes sense, because she does need to buff her power, it's shown in the manga.

It'll be funny to me too, as a shipper; because Gojo basically sees himself as a god/the honored one he says haha. So having Utahime need a god to unleash her technique... just - they're just a match made in heaven aren't they... ompf xD

Gege is a buff for his Japanese history and folklore... So it'll be interesting to see how he envisions Utahime's character.

Finally, it's fun playing around with Gojo and Utahime's dynamic. They're a funny pair. So funny in fact - that they are always portrayed as arguing, bickering fools who hate each other. That bonus chapter with them was funny.

It's really funny.

Because all this, I believe; is by Gege's design. And he's more than happy to fan the flames of Gojo and Utahime's hateful relationship. Because there's something deeper waiting for their relationship in the plot.

As always, it's just me rambling. Could be nothing. I'm not Gege.

Just really a curious notion I thought to type down. :D

- that Gojo is hated when he's basically everyone's protector; and

- that Utahime is the only weak character from among the sorcerers.

[orionshounds]

I’ve been knee deep in dsmp lore streams and I just want to ramble about it

Dream smp lore is so good, it’s so good!!! Not only is the story itself just fascinating, but how it’s presented so uniquely through the medium of minecraft of all things is just so cool. One of my favorite parts of the lore is seeing how everyone on the smp has their own “style” they present it in, and watching them find the way they find the most enjoyment in is so cool. Literally no two streamer’s lore stream quite like each others and it’s just incredible! It just speaks to the flexibility of roleplay as an artistic medium and really shows everyone’s individual personalities. 

Wilbur was dramatic as hell and wrote eloquent speeches. He started a drug operation under the guise as a country, and it lead to a revolution in which he was able to explore the spiral of a man who loses control of everything he had built. And after his arc and he wanted a break from the server? He created ghostbur, an amnesic comic relief with just enough touch of tragedy that he is still able to make heartbreaking monologues when he wants to.

Tommy is able to run around with his friends and cause as much chaos to his heart’s extent, but there is so much more than meets the eye. He is incredibly social and isn’t afraid to start conflict with a lot of people, bringing them into the roleplay. He doesn’t back down from storytelling either. His character goes through terrible situations and he fully explores the trauma that comes from those experiences. His character goes against the “stereotypical” trauma I see alot in media; instead of being shy or scared he’s reactionary, he’s angry, he’s violent, he’s depressed. I’m actually really impressed with the heavy subject matter this 17 year old teen has managed to portray (I’ve connected with it quite personally at certain points), while still being able to keep the light hearted fun that’s so intrinsic to his personality. 

Tubbo isn’t really interested in serious lore as much. Even in dire moments he tells jokes and just has fun. So, in his recent lore, he just streams as normal while putting mysterious writing on screen that he doesn’t acknowledge or have to explain, which I think is just a genius work around for him to participate in lore. He still has his dedicated lore streams sometimes, and when he is in the acting zone he has some of the most powerful moments out of everyone on the server.

Ranboo, while having stake in the greater smp lore, is much more character focused. He presents his lore through long monologues and fucking heart-wrenching voice acting. He loves working in themes of horror and causing a specific feeling in the viewer. So he chooses specific music as a themes for events/characters and creates visual queues in his overlays to draw out that desired reaction. He also values improve a LOT, if something unexpected comes up he just runs with it and he has made huge changes to his lore as early as 30 min before a stream.

Technoblade, while arguably one of the most powerful people on the server, prefers a more light-hearted yet dramatic approach to lore. When Dream was at his house looking for Tommy, Techno had no problem joking around and making fun of him for being homeless. He tore down an entire nation on the server and had so much fun doing it! He’s more of an antagonist than a true villain in my opinion. And lets not forget how dedicated he is to the game, he’s cracked at the craft. He spends hours grinding and creating farms on the smp, for amazing pay offs (his several vault reveals, the withers, etc), most of which weren’t even on stream!

Karl Jacobs is extremely social, so he created Tales from the smp as a way to involve TONS of people in lore while exploring the past and future of the server (it was also a way for viewers who weren’t that well versed in dsmp lore to join and not have to worry about it!). And through this premise, he took the opportunity to develop his own character on the smp; making an incredibly tragic story of a time traveler trying to save his home while slowly loosing his memories. Not to mention the beautifully shot cutscenes of the Inbetween and the Other Side. He includes so many people behind the scenes as well, collabing with other members on lore, hiring building teams and people to make intros and credit scenes, and promoting fanart and fansongs from the community!

Quackity explores his lore through heavily scripted events and amazingly shot cut scenes. While the way he expresses his lore comes at the cost of improv, the payoff of the visuals and story is well worth it! The shots he makes of the smp is downright gorgeous, no to mention he’s the first person to include irl footage in his lore (not counting facecams)! He’s not afraid of thoroughly examining his own character, being one of the only people I can think of that shows us “past events” leading up to something that has already happened.

Badboyhalo, Antfrost, Ponk, Skeppy, Captain Puffy, Punz, Awesamdude, Hannahxxrose all work together on shared lore and the payoff is amazing! By introducing the Egg, a constant antagonistic force that constantly pulls on character’s relationships with each other, everyone is able to stream together to battle for or against the egg! There’s also plenty of room for people to do individual lore that's more intimate to their respective character. They spend hours changing vines, putting up posters, slowly shaping the smp in a way that makes it exciting to watch streams to see just what has changed everyday. Because there’s so many people necessary to tell the egg’s story, it does comes at the cost of time (the egg has been around FOREVER). However, they all work together super hard and I just admire their commitment to the story they’re trying to tell!

And Sam! He has several different “Modes” his character is in (and an entirely separate character, Sam Nook) that he gets to explore lore with. He’s a terrifying warden, he’s a money motivated businessman, he’s a conflicted lover, he’s a traumatized victim of the egg, and just so much more. Through having so many different “roles” in the rp he gets to explore relationships and plotlines with a whole array of people. Not to mention he’s absolutely cracked at redstone and has some of the most impressive builds on the server.

And Puffy! So much of her lore is calling into question the morality of the server and really makes you step back and think critically about the characters. Her character also has, in my opinion, one of the most interesting relationships with Dream, the main antagonist of the entire server, which is just fascinating to watch unfold. Not to mention she’s one of the first people to start exploring the backstory of her character!

George doesn’t exactly do lore. In fact he’s slept through so much of it it’s become a meme. And you know what? That mad man took that and ran with it. He explains his absence in the story by having his character literally being asleep through it, creating mystery where there used to just be an absence. He’s able to goof off with his friends and have borderline nonsensical streams, then at the end sucker punch the audience emotionally by “waking up” and have the viewers question just what was real and what wasn’t?

The smp has the freedom for people who want more independent lore to be able to explore their character’s that way as well!

Hbomb, Connereatspants, and Purpled don’t have a lot of lore on the smp, generally only coming on to have fun with everyone, but when they do have their moments it unfolds in very interesting ways!

Sapnap, Eret, and Schlatt maybe aren’t as active as some other people, but when they are on they actively participate in lore and have lasting impacts on the story (Ex: Eret’s betrayal, Sapnap’s visit to dream in the prison, Schlatt becoming president).

Philza mostly does his own thing, improving the server or making some bomb ass builds. He has incredibly devastating roles in lore (killing wilbur, blowing up L’manberg for the final time, starting the syndicate with Techno), but he also has quieter moments that speak to the depth his character has, such as fishing with fundy or reminiscing about his dead son and how it went so wrong. Like Techno, he doesn’t like to take lore completely seriously, often laughing no matter what’s happening or teasing chat after something big goes down, but his character is solid with a lot of potential for future lore.

Foolish has only started on his character and its already super interesting. The hints at his dark past as a “god of death” and his current conflict with the egg are intriguing as fuck. Not to mention the MASSIVE builds he does for everyone, helping to progress their lore as well.

Fundy has a lot of freedom with his character to participate however much he wants in lore. While generally he’s a trickster who loves to prank people he has enough tragedy build into his backstory he’s able to break the viewer’s heart with a flip of a switch. Not to mention his recent, almost surreal, stream that explored his character’s disturbing dreams that may or may not predict the future.

Niki is very character driven, exploring her character's grief of losing her best friend and her anger of being ignored in the very country she helped create. She has incredibly emotional moments, and even though she’s on her own building an underground city she still participates in other lore via teaming with jack manifold or the syndicate.

Jack Manifold’s lore is VERY character focused, and while he’s described his story as a “B plot that occasionally intersects with the main plot”, the story he tells is still fascinating. Being pushed aside not taken seriously his whole life, his character develops into a fun cartoony-esque villain who begs to be taken seriously, that has the depth of a truly conflicted person who is torn between wanting revenge on everyone who’s done him wrong and just wanting a friend.

Last but not least, the man himself, Dream. The most fascinating thing about his lore is that absolutely none of it is from his pov. All we know about his character is only from what we see from everyone else’s povs, and in his case it leads to a very intimidating villain! Not to mention, mans owns the damn server and yet has made himself the main antagonist! He is the only character I consider a “true villain” on the smp. His voice acting and writing is downright sinister. I could write a fucking essay on how his character’s obsession with power has led him to the point he thinks himself an unstoppable god

Everyone on this server is stunning and I love all of them!!!!!

[lucemferto]

Niki Nihachu & Barbara Kean

Gonna drop something controversial real quick.

Niki Nihachu is the most tragic character on the Dream SMP – and I don’t mean in the sense of her having a tragic story (though she is up there), but in the sense that she is tragically mishandled.

I want to start out by saying that this essay is by no means an attack on the content creator Niki Nihachu or her abilities as a performer. She is frequently one of the strongest actors on the SMP and I have no idea how much of her character writing was within her power. How much of it was improv, how much pre-planned, how much something she genuinely wanted to do and how much stuff she just stumbled into or – in the worst-case scenario – was forced upon her. I don’t know.

The Dream SMP is not very transparent when it comes to their creative process. As such I can only judge it as a discerning viewer and English major dropout, who retained some half-remembered stuff about narratology.

So, a few weeks ago, I tumbled on here that Niki’s character journey reminded me a lot of the character Barbara Kean from the hit TV-show Gotham. Then I got an ask asking me to elaborate. This is the elaboration.

Barbara Kean

So, a quick crash course for people who haven’t seen Gotham (the greatest comic book show on Television, seriously, what are you doing with your life?!): Barbara Kean was a major female character throughout all five seasons of Gotham – and not once during those five seasons did the writers ever figure out what they wanted to do with her.

Every 10-12 episodes or so, Barbara’s role shifted completely. She started out as cop-protagonist Jim Gordon’s girlfriend at home and moral compass, then became part of a bisexual love triangle, then a hard-drinking jealous party girl with a backstory as repressed, lonely rich kid, before being kidnapped by a serial killer and ultimately making her perfect metamorphosis into the psychotic ex-girlfriend trope.

And that was Season 1.

Since then, she became the pseudo-Harley Quinn to the pseudo-Joker, a whip-wielding dominatrix, the obligatory female member in a supervillain squad, some sort of information broker, a mafia kingpin, the leader of a girl-power posse and – my favourite – the reincarnated wife of an ancient immortal who also controls all of Gotham and transferred that control over to her before that plot-point was dropped harder than a half-dead Oswald Cobblepot of the Gotham piers.

Also, she’s Batgirl’s mom.

In short, it’s a mess – but that’s what makes Gotham kinda fun.

Character Cohesion

Now, obviously, Niki’s character journey has not been quite as extreme. But it falls into the same traps, I find. Namely, that there’s just a distinct lack of character cohesion or character continuity.

Now, character cohesion or character continuity doesn’t mean that the arcs these characters undertake can’t be explained in a logical way. Barbara’s character journey is logical in the sense that you can explain it all with in-universe logic – but it’s not logical from a narratological sense now, is it?

Character Cohesion basically means that a character’s journey is reflected in their personal conflict – their Want vs. Need. Their arc is the natural continuation of what was set-up in previous sequences. Everything falls into a whole with Set-up, Confrontation, Resolution – we set up the character’s Want, their Want and Need are conflicting, the Want vs. Need is resolved. Ideally this coincides with the plot beats of the large conflict surrounding the cast.

When you look at Barbara in Season 1 of Gotham, you’re not thinking “This one right here – she’s the reincarnated wife of Ra’s Al Ghul”. Because why would you? There was no set-up; it’s not part of what her character was about in this moment – or any moment before that concept was introduced. It’s not needed for her character conflict (or any thematic conflicts for that matter).

It’s quite transparently just something that is affixed to her so that she has something until the writers come up with the next at which that first thing will dropped, underdeveloped.

Niki in Season 1

Niki follows the same route, unfortunately. She’s set-up as the resistance in L’Manburg, allies herself with Eret and HBomb until – oops – it doesn’t end mattering, because that entire side of the “plot” is completely underdeveloped. Just be a damsel until Wilbur can swoop in and save you, Niki.

Okay, but now she has a big moment with Tommy and Tubbo just after the pit-scene. “We’ll figure something out”, she says. “We need L’Manburg back”. This is all before the backdrop of Wilbur completely giving in to his role as a villain and Techno’s apparent “betrayal”.

So, now, surely, Niki is gonna affect change in Pogtopia and will have some influence on either Tommy or Wilbur, the two people she’s closest to. What’s this? Her biggest contribution is holding a birthday party where Quackity convinces Wilbur to hold off on his TNT-plan? And after that … she’s just gonna be part of the Pogtopia-masses?

Now, I like Wilbur’s writing and Season 1 generally, but when it comes to Niki (and Eret) something went terribly wrong. Both of them provided many a set-up – none of which were taken advantage of, unfortunately.

And, just to be clear, I’m not putting the blame on Niki here (or at least not most of it). Season 1 was pretty firmly in Wilbur’s hand … and Season 2 was a train wreck.

Niki in Season 2

Niki is – for the most part of Season 2 – a nothing character. She has no real conflict, no character beats, no arc. This is because through some unfortunate writing decisions, Season 2 is pretty squarely focused on a specific set of characters – and even fewer of those characters are granted a fully explored, completed character arc.

It all culminates in her Doomsday villain arc – a moment that can be logically explained from both an in-character perspective and a meta-perspective, but unfortunately, it’s not justified from a technical writing point of view.

Niki burning down the L’Mantree is her “Ra’s Al Ghul’s reincarnated wife”-moment. It’s a big statement that put her character on the map for a large part of the audience again. It was a striking visual. It could not be ignored.

Most of that was because it was a stark departure from her characterization in Season 1. Now, such a departure doesn’t necessarily have to be bad. The problem comes in when

a.) The full potential of the character in their previous narrative role had not yet been fully or even partly exhausted

b.) It cuts into an on-going character arc and drastically changes its course

c.) It’s not foreshadowed or developed properly.

And most of those are true for Niki’s character. She was not necessarily underdeveloped but underexplored in Season 1 and had no consistent storyline going on in Season 2. She was a witness to Tommy’s trial, but that was never worked into an on-going storyline for her. No matter how much we retroactively pretend like this turn to villainy, this breakdown, was brewing deep inside of her – there was no foreshadowing.

The reason, why I said it’s understandable from a meta-perspective, is that the content creator Niki Nihachu had a self-admittedly hard time getting her foot in in Season 2 – because Season 2, for as much love as I will heap upon Tommy’s and Dream’s storyline, was a pretty messy.

So, the villain arc was not well foreshadowed and Niki’s turn was developed, but what happened after she was in it?

Niki in Season 3

Well, unfortunately that problem of an inconsistent storyline never really went away for her. In the beginning of Season 3, she hatched her wagons with Jack Manifold, which was a pretty big tonal shift – from darkly tragic to cartoonish villainy.

But as Jack kept developing his character in that lane and following up on big plot development with corresponding character moments, Niki again just … vanished. She then changed gears again, joining the Syndicate – a great idea if only the Syndicate actually streamed together and developed a storyline and group cohesion.

As it stands right now, Niki’s character exists in the negative space of the fandom imaginations. We are given some scraps and good character moments – her sleeping in a jail cell, “I started baking again”, her secret city – but those moments never coalesce into a full-fledged storyline.

Her character’s journey is still as fragmented and underexplored as it ever was. I really hope that – with Wilbur’s revival and the new character conflict that seems to arise from that for her – she manages to finally get the foot in and get the storyline and dynamic arc she deserves.

[fanmoose12]

the devil you know

Сharacters: Hange Zoe, Levi, Moblit Berner, Zeke Yeagar, Armin Arlert

Genres: Action / Drama

Summary: Can you still miss a person, if everything you knew about them was a lie?

Сhapter 4/?

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Every single night, she was tormented by the same nightmare. Every single night, the same memory replayed behind her closed eyelids. She saw that fateful night, the night when she had decided she couldn’t keep pretending anymore.

It was the night before the great battle, and, as always, Levi fell asleep in her bed, curled around her body, holding on to her almost desperately, as though he was afraid that should he let go even for a second, she’d vanish.

Levi thought that his embrace could keep her with him. Hange wished for it to be the truth.

Getting out of the circle of his arms was a considerable effort, he held her too close, too tight, and Hange… Hange didn’t want to leave that sweet embrace. Levi was wrapped around her like a vice, he was a poison ivy that had its twigs engraved so deep it reached to the very depths of her heart.

Hange had to cut it out, to cut him out. And, by gods, was it an unwanted progress.

But after a few moments of quiet struggling, of silent curses and pants, she slipped out from his embrace and their bed. That small victory was well-earned, but not enjoyed. Hange felt her heart break the moment Levi’s arms were no longer around her. Without him, she felt so cold. With every inch she put between them, the ice that began covering her heart continued growing.

Next, she packed her scarce belongings. She wanted to take more, she couldn’t do it. Everything she’d take back home – her uniform with Wings of Freedom splayed proudly on the back, her heavy notebooks with dozens of notes and sketches done by her beloved assistant, that book Erwin had once given her, the scarf Mike had knitted for her, the flower Levi had gifted her, the very same one she treasured just dearly as the memory of him confessing after the gift had been presented, - all of it was going to be looked at and thoroughly analyzed. By her Marleyan comrades, friends and possible prosecutors.

She could take nothing that could be conceived as dubious, but that jacket, the one that was shared by both of them and still held his scent and warmth— she wasn’t strong enough to leave it behind.

So she put it on, praying for it to give her strength.

A long way home was awaiting her.

And Hange couldn’t leave without giving him, the one man she truly loved, a goodbye kiss.

“I know you won’t,” she whispered against his brow, her fingers caressing his hair with a feather light touch, “but please try to forgive me. It was out of my control, Levi.”

It was his fault too. When Levi came, the ground had been kicked from under her feet. And a simple mission turned into a tragedy.

When she gathered enough strength to leave the room, the hallway was empty. Hange knew it would be, she was familiar with the workings of Survey Corps like the back of her hand. She strolled through the well-known hallways without fear, trailing her hand along the walls.

The Military Headquarters back at Liberio was better built than this building. Even Warriors’ barracks, despite being designed to hold Eldians, were built so much better. Those buildings were sturdier, more technologically equipped, much more comfortable.

But, god damn it, she was going to miss Survey Corps’ headquarters, this shitty building that was situated in the middle of nowhere.

Compared to Marley, everything in Paradise was ancient, outdated, useless. But it didn’t stop her from loving that fucked up little island. It didn’t stop her from loving people that were living there, despite them being branded as monsters by her nation.

She turned the corner, took the stairs, and, at the end of it, just near the exit Hange saw a shadow.

She meant to duck behind the corner, to run and hide, but the form of that shadow was all too familiar, and she was just as familiar to that shadow. Hange had no choice but to stop and surrender to another cruel twist of fate.

“Squad Leader!” Moblit ran up to her, smiling and endearing as always.

Fucking hell, and Hange thought that saying goodbye to Levi would be the hardest task. However, Levi, at least, hadn’t been awake.

“Are you nervous, as well?" he asked, curiously peering into her eyes. Was she nervous? That was an understatement. "Personally, I can’t sleep! I’ve been thinking and thinking, and I even wrote a letter to my Momma, do you remember her?”

Of course, Hange remembered Moblit’s Momma, the soft and caring Mrs. Berner, a far kinder woman than Hange’s Momma was.

“I told her about our mission and how proud I am for participating in it. And… I added a second part, the one that would be sent in case…”

“No.” Hange shook her head resolutely, her hands clenching into fists. No, no, no, she refused to even entertain that foul idea. Impulsively, she took a step forward, circling her arms around her sweet assistant. “No, Moblit,” she repeated, voice muffled by his shirt. If he heard the quiet sniffling, Hange didn’t care. Moblit never minded her eccentricities. “You will survive. You will survive this shit and the next one you will undoubtedly face. You will make your Momma and everyone else around you proud.” You will make me proud. “And you will leave a glorious, happy and long life. You promise me?”

“Squad Leader…”

“Promise me!” she demanded, bordering on desperation.

In that moment, the dream always divided from reality.

In reality, Hange waited until he had given her a promise, and then feigned exhaustion, leaving Moblit to use another exit. But in a dream, Moblit made her stay, coercing her to have a cup of tea with him. And in the candle-light lit mass hall, they met Erwin, then Levi joined their impromptu party, gluing himself to her side and blinking sleepily at everyone who had gathered.

In a dream, Hange never left. She stayed under Moblit’s care, was guided by Erwin’s wisdom, was surrounded by Levi’s love.

And that’s why that dream was a cruel, excruciating nightmare. It showed her things that could never be. It showed her the future she desperately wanted to come true. Escaping from the clutches of that fantasy was hard, painful. And if that was complicated….

Well, waking up in that bed was pure agony.

Every single morning, Hange woke up lost and disoriented, and had to spend a few long moments, making sense of it all.

Her first instinct was to stretch her arms, to yawn and reach out – to warmth and comfort, to loving embrace, husky voice and reluctant kiss. To him. To everything she had lost. To everything she never actually had.

But she was alone in that bed.

There was no Levi, lying next to her, complaining about her morning breath. There was no Squad Leader Hange, no four-eyes , who would smile and start singing in Levi’s ear.

There was only she, a broken, empty shell of a person.

A Marleyan who fell for an Eldian. A war chief that devised weapons for her enemies. A fool with twisted loyalties and convoluted goals.

She betrayed her homeland, she didn’t have a home.

She was abandoned by her fellow countrymen, was rejected by the people closest to her.

But, strangely, as pathetic as she was, as miserable and wretched, she was not alone. Even in her sorry state, despite her vile betrayal, she still had a friend.

He was by all means her enemy, a monster and a devil, and yet he saved her life more times than she could count.

Even now, when her lies had been discovered and her villainy uncovered, he remained by her side, continued to care for her.

If all Eldians were truly as monstrous as she had been told since her birth, then how to make sense if the existence of one extremely brave, inexplicably kind Moblit Berner? Hange, as genius as she was, couldn’t understand him, couldn’t explain why someone as good and bright as him had decided to stick with her.

“Good morning!” he walked into her room with a smile, carrying her breakfast on a plate.

He had been repeating the exact same routine every day for the past month. He had been doing this ever since Erwin had appointed him as her assistant.

In that room, that bed, nostalgia, memories and regrets were impossible to escape.

Hange tried telling Moblit that he didn’t have to this, didn't have to care for her as though she was still his comrade. But Moblit was relentless. And she was too lonely and miserable to cut off the only kind soul that remained loyal to her.

“I managed to get your favorite biscuits this morning,” he continued, moving around the room to put the cutlery down on a table and open the curtains to let the sunshine in. “Almost got in a fight with Sasha because of it.”

Despite herself, Hange snickered. Moblit always had that kind of an effect on her. He possessed the uncanny ability to cheer her up with a simple, but heartfelt and caring gesture.

There was only one other person who was better at it than him. But after everything that happened between them… the hell would freeze sooner than she would hear praise and a comforting word from him.

Waving those sullen thoughts away, Hange stretched her arms and rose from the bed. She followed the sweet aroma of biscuits to the table Moblit had set for her.

“Any updates on Gabi and Falco?”

That was the first question she asked every morning. And every morning, Moblit gave her the same disappointing answer.

“I’m sorry,” he ducked his head solemnly. “We didn’t manage to locate them yet.

Hange expected as much. And yet, the lack of news still troubled her. Where were fierce Gabi and adorable Falco? Were they—

She shook her head, pressing lips together. Of course, they were still alive. They were candidates, the best of all best. Mentally repeating that mantra a couple of times, she forced her mind flow into different direction.

“What’s our plan for today?” she asked through a mouthful of biscuits. “Are we going to work on a new uniform again?”

Working on that project was fun. Having Mobllit as her assistant once again was fun. In the moments, when her brain was too occupied with an idea, she could almost pretend that everything was normal. That she was Squad Leader Hange, working with Executive Officer Moblit on a new project. Sometimes, Hange got so lost in that little game inside her head, she even expected for the door to burst open to let a grumpy Captain inside. But, of course, that couldn't happen.

These distant memories, they were comforting. They reminded her of the rare times in her life when she was truly happy. But the past... was in the past.

“Eh, you see…” Moblit raised a hand to his head, scratching the back of it with an apologizing smile. “Armin asked me to look into something. I was actually wondering if you would like to accompany me. I bet you’re getting sick of spending days in these four walls.”

She was starting to feel like a wilting flower, that was true. It would have been nice to go outside. However…

“Am I even allowed to leave this room?”

Moblit winced. “I’m not really sure about it… But I was assigned to look after you. I think it wouldn’t hurt if you go with me. Besides…” he sat on the chair next to her, looking at her almost pleadingly. Oh, Moblit and his perfect puppy eyes, Hange could never resist them. “I’d like to have your company. And, perhaps, your advice as well…”

“Advice?” Hange frowned. “On what? What is your task about exactly?”

“Don’t know if I can tell you,” nevertheless, Moblit leaned in, lowering his voice to a whisper. “But they found out that one of the volunteers, Yelena, has been conspiring with Eren. They asked me to interrogate the other volunteer.”

“Oh?” that sounded both ominous and intriguing. Hange curled her lips into a grin and raised an eyebrow. “You want me to use my interrogating skills?”

“No!” paling slightly, Moblit frantically lifted his hands, shaking them from side to side. “No reaping out nails, please! No threats of bloody violence! Just… talk with him.”

She almost forgot how easy it was to tease and embarrass Moblit. Oh, how Hange missed him.

“Alright, I’ll do my best to control the violent urges,” she winked at him, laughing at his scandalous face. “And thank you for inviting me. It’s been ages since I saw the world outside that room.”

“There is another thing I have to ask of you...” Moblit cast his eyes down, playing with the sleeve of his coat. “Technically, I’ll be representing Survey Corps, so…”

Oh. Hange shifted her gaze to the wardrobe, where her old uniform was still hanging. That feeling inside her, she couldn’t quite identify it. Was it shame? Or trepidation?

She showed nothing of it to Moblit. As their eyes met, she faced him with an easy smile.

“Sure, I don’t mind. I do wonder if that thing still fits me.”

“It is. It always will.”

The remark was short, it could be read as meaningless. But Moblit’s voice was deep and gravely, full of conviction. Hange tilted her head, stealing a moment to study him more closely. He looked back at her, his hazel eyes honest and kind.

A lump in her throat was thick enough to make it hard to breathe. It brought tears to her eyes. Hange closed them tightly, to keep the tears from falling down.

“I need a moment,” she murmured, facing away from Moblit, “I’ll be ready in five.”

“I’ll be waiting in the hallway,” he said and let her be.

___

Walking through the streets of Sina was both pleasant and excruciating.

Feeling the sun on her cheeks and the wind in her hair after so many days of being confined to a one single room was enjoyable, enough to put a smile on her lips. And Sina, so very different from Liberio, was a lovely city with interesting architecture and narrow clean streets.

But these places were too familiar, the alleyways etched into her mind too deeply. And the uniform… the long green coat fitted her too well, and, at the same time, suffocated her. The shiny Wings of Freedom were burning her even through the clothes.

This proud emblem, it wasn’t hers. She wasn’t worthy of wearing it.

And the looks people had been given her, the awe and pride— fuck, Hange would rather prefer they cursed and flanged stones at her.

“Their smiles make me uncomfortable,” Moblit confessed. “They used to throw shit at us after every expedition. But now that Eren has killed a bunch of people, they suddenly decide that we’re heroes.”

“You always have been heroes.”

You, not we. There was nothing heroic inside of her.

“Remember that tavern?” Moblit’s cheerful voice and excited expression didn’t chase away the shadows completely. But the shadows took a step back, frightened by his light. “We had a glorious fight with MPs there.”

The fond memory brought laughter to her lips. “You almost got your arm broken in that fight.”

Moblit chuckled along with her. “Thanks to you I didn’t. I thought that punch of yours would get that guy obliterated.”

Hange touched her knuckles tenderly. Moblit was right, that was one hell of a punch. If she closed her eyes, she could almost feel how the force of the hit had reverberated through her skin, tendons, muscles and down to the bones. Perhaps, that time, she had overdone it. She always had troubles reining in her anger.

“And remember that guy Captain Levi kicked? I see him around from time to time. Because of his broken jaw, he still has trouble speaking clearly.”

Ah, Hange remembered that guy as well. He was red-headed and had an ugly moustache. He also left a nasty bruise on her cheek. Levi’s kick to his jaw was a payback for that.

“Those were the times, huh?” Moblit nudged her, offering a kind smile.

Hange averted her eyes, feeling her lips quiver. Yeah, those were the times. Distant times, now they seemed more like a dream. A dream Hange wouldn’t want to wake up from.

Sensing her discomfort, Moblit steered them to the side, taking their conversation in another direction as well. “Speaking of Captain Levi, I sent him the new uniform. He wrote back that he liked it.”

The uniform she accidentally created with Levi’s size in mind. It was in no way intentional. She thought of Survey Corps’ soldiers when she was making a design. And in her mind, the perfect example of the scout was Levi. She was surprised she still remembered his size. Although, considering how much time she had dedicated to studying his body…

The new uniform was a sudden project, a product of the abundance of free time on her part. She wasn’t going to show it to anyone. Even Moblit found out about it by pure accident, when he stumbled upon her crude drawings. She was surprised he liked it. She was surprised Levi liked it. Did he really, though?

“He actually wrote so?”

“Well, he wrote that it could be useful, and in his words…”

Oh. As high praise as one could get from Levi.

“You write to him?” truthfully, that was another surprise for Hange. She didn’t remember Moblit and Levi have any sort of relationships, especially this close.

“We talk a lot,” Moblit shrugged, looking anywhere but at Hange. She was starting to wonder why, but his next words quickly unveiled the mystery. “Technically, we’re the only adults in Survey Corps, and after you left, we… found that we have a lot in common.”

Well. At least, her betrayal had one good outcome. It gave birth to a new friendship. And destroyed several old ones. Hange winced at the last thought.

“Oh, look where are we!” Moblit once again pulled her out of the abyss with his clear, loud voice. The wonder, added to it, however, seemed a little bit too faked. As smart and sharp as he was, Moblit could never excel at lying and pretending.

Not like she did.

Forcing these thoughts away, Hange followed the direction Moblit was pointing at. She couldn’t help but smile at what came into her sights.

Sina’s pastries. The best bakery in the city. In Hange’s humble opinion, the best bakery in the whole damn world. The one they had back at home, on the corner of the street in Liberio, right next to her apartment, didn’t even compare.

Just looking at the sign made her mouth fill with saliva.

“Moblit,” she grasped at his sleeve, her hold desperate. Her eyes were still trained on that shiny sign made in cursive. “Moblit, I know I’m asking a lot—”

He grinned. “Want me to get you that cherry pie you loved so much?”

Oh god, yes. Right now, Hange wanted it more than anything else.

“I understand it if you can’t. I mean, I’m a prisoner from a foreign country. Isn’t buying pies considered to be treason in this case?”

Moblit chuckled warmly. He looked at her, and his expression was kind and gentle enough to make the saints weep. He curled his hand around her shoulder, and from the place where he touched her, warmth spread through her body. “I wouldn’t mind committing treason for a friend.”

Fuck. Hange felt it once again. Her heart squeezing painfully, her throat constricting, tears welling in her eyes. She had to shut her lids to keep them from falling down her cheeks.

Her eyes still closed, with her voice cracking, she asked, “Would it be weird if I give you a hug right now?”

“Don’t know. Is it weird that I really want that hug?”

Her sob turning into a giggle, Hange surged forward, falling right in Moblit’s waiting arms. He pressed her close, his palm patting her on the back. Hange buried her face in his chest and relaxed against him, inhaling his faint scent of citrus and cinnamon. Sweet and pleasant, just like Moblit.

What was she doing all that time, without him at her side?

Moblit smiled at her as they separated. Hange meant to smile back, but in that exact moment— her stomach gurgled. Loudly.

She cringed.

“So… about that pie?”

“I’m on it,” Moblit promised and darted to the bakery.

___

Perhaps, it was fate. It was destiny, divine intervention, that led her to this moment. To the wooden bench in the park, to the bird’s singing in her ear, to the sweet, heavenly taste in her mouth.

The pie was perfect, so much better than Hange had remembered. It was soft enough to melt in her mouth, leaving a pleasant aftertaste. It was sweet, but not sugary, the cherry toping adding slight bitterness.

Fantastic, the pie was fantastic. If Hange could, she’d stay in that bakery until the end of her days, devouring those phenomenal pastries until she exploded. Ah, what a happy death that would be…

Moblit observed her with an amused grin. “Did they not feed you at all in your Marley?”

“Not like this.” Hange managed, despite her full mouth.

Food in Marley was more diverse than on Paradise. They had more resources, they had a bigger variety of products and ingredients. But Hange was a soldier. She either ate at barracks or she cooked for herself at home. Food, made by army cooks, was nourishing, but lacking in flavor. And the dinners, prepared by her, almost always consisted of something quick and extremely simple.

The only place where Hange could eat to her heart’s content, where food was made out of the best, freshest ingredients and prepared by the most skillful chefs, was the official events, organized by the brass. And as the leader of the research facility, one of the most recognized war chief and the only child of her father, one of the Marleyan’s biggest heroes, Hange was always a welcome guest on these events.

But they were so boring that not even a promise of good food could make her sit until the end of them.

“Well, wait until you try Niccolo’s food. He is a true master.”

“Already did,” her stomach once again gurgled, this time the embarrassing sound was provoked by the memory of Sasha and Connie treating her to some of the maestro’s masterpieces. Sasha certainly was a lucky girl. “I ate so much, I thought I was gonna puke.”

“Yeah, I know the feeling,” bashfully, Moblit rubbed his neck. “The first time he made food for us, I was eating like the man starved. I was so ashamed, but then I looked around,” he chuckled lowly, a wistful smile tugging at his lips. “And realized I wasn’t the only one.”

“I see you had a lot of fun,” she said, swallowing the bitter taste in her mouth. She wasn’t one of them, and never was. The suddenly appeared sadness was foolish and unwelcome. She had her own friends back home. Perhaps, they still thought about her. Perhaps, they still cared. “And what about that guy you need to interrogate? Is he also an amazing cook?”

“No, he is a soldier, he taught us so much about your technology! He was the one who was in charge of controlling the airship we used to get to Liberio.”

So their new friend was a pilot? And, apparently, a skillful one at that. Navigating through Liberio during all that chaos was certainly a challenge. Hange wondered if she knew him.

“So what is the name of that ace pilot of yours?”

Moblit lifted his chin, something close to pride appearing in his gaze. "He really is amazing. His name is Onyakopon."

Hange's jaw dropped. Her precious pie almost dropped as well. Hadn't she misheard? Onyakopon? The same Onyakopon who had spent almost a year as her understudy? Who taught Hange how to pilot the plane? That Onyakopon?

Could it really be? Could they really meet here, after so many years, on Paradis of all the places? Or was it some other Onyakopon who also happened to be an ace pilot?

"Hange-san?" a worried crease lay between Moblit's eyebrows. "Are the two of you—"

"Don't know," she shrugged, promptly finishing the last of her pie. "Shall we go and find that out?"

Moblit nodded resolutely. Hange felt something like nostalgia stirring up inside her.

___

For a man who was supposedly under a close watch and a possible suspect, Onyakopon had the nicest of accommodations. Much better than Hange's single room.

The house was small, but cozy, surrounded by pretty garden and vast green fields. If one were to ignore the lonely guard who was munching on an apple in the shadow of the tree, the front yard possessed absolutely no flaws.

Hange immediately shared her observation with Moblit, telling it to him in a faint whisper.

"Let's hope Onyakopon isn't a traitor and we won't end up dragging him from this heavenly place," he answered her.

If their Onyakopon was the same Onyakopon Hange knew, they wouldn't need to take the drastic measures. He was a smart, honest and good man. And, judging by Moblit's set expression, he knew that too.

As they approached the house, a man came in their sights. Dark-skinned, tall and handsome, he was reading a book on the porch, a look of complete concentration on his face.

All doubt left her mind. It was the same Onyakopon. The bright, curious young man who wanted to learn from her and who taught her something in return.

At the sound of their footsteps, Onyankopon looked up. And recognized her too, from just one glance. As their eyes met, his grew in size, almost comically. So he didn't know she was there as well. Strange, Hange would have thought he overheard the commotion she had caused on their trip back to Paradis.

But, perhaps, Onyakopon was too focused on piloting the airship and keeping all of them alive.

"Hange?" his voice was no louder than the wind's song. Hange nodded swiftly, having troubles finding her own voice. She wasn't sure it would obey her. "Oh I'll be damned!" Onyakopon jumped to his feet and all but ran to her. He squeezed her elbows, peering into her face in disbelief. "I'll be damned, Hange! I've heard the talks about some Marleyan soldier, but I could never guess that it was you! No one told me that you were captured."

Well, captured might be a strong word to describe what happened to her. Levi didn't capture her, he simply caught her - unaware and unprepared. Hange saw the face that was haunting her dreams and didn't even think of fighting against him.

She thought that Levi came to kill her then. She was almost ready for him to do it, to finish it once and for all. Being killed by the humanity's strongest - was there a greater honor? Being killed by the man you loved so dearly - was there a bigger joy?

Gently, Hange pried Onyakopon's hands off her. "It's a very long story."

"I have—"

"You don't," Moblit took a step forward, partially hiding Hange behind his back. "We need to talk, Onyakopon. I'm sure you've already guessed why."

"Yeah. Your friend here," Onyankopon threw an accusing glare at his guardian who was enjoying the afternoon shade, not disturbed by their conversation. "Already warned me. Alright," he let out a defeated sigh, "Do you guys want tea or coffee? Maybe, some snacks?"

Moblit gave him a tight-lipped smile. "We've already eaten, thank you."

"I— I'll bring some tea anyway."

He disappeared inside the house without another word. Hange and Moblit watched him go, then, when he vanished from their sight, they shared a look.

"He doesn't seem nervous," Hange remarked.

Moblit seemed to be of the same opinion. "He looks rather disappointed. I really hope he is innocent. But..." he shook his head and mumbled, more to himself than Hange, "I was always bad at figuring out liars."

Ouch. If after everything she had been through, Hange still possessed a heart, Moblit's words would have dealt a fatal blow.

Alas... She felt but a small pang. It didn't make her wheeze with pain, only forced to cast her eyes down.

___

Onyakopon returned after a few minutes, carrying a tray with three cups on it. Jerking his head into its direction, he led them to a table on the backyard.

Once they all took their places, heavy silence hanged over them. Onyakopon was the one to break it.

"So, no offence," he tilted his head to the side, his gaze slowly switching between Hange and Moblit. "If this is the official business, then… why Hange is here?"

"It's a long story," Hange said at the same time as Moblit claimed,

"Hange and I have been working together before."

"Wait..." a frown appeared on Onyakopon's face. It was almost immediately taken over by the look of shock. "Are you telling me that the famed Marleyan spy I've been hearing so much about, the one who spent five years on Paradis and almost became the Commander of Survey Corps, is Hange Zoe, one of the brightest minds of Marley?"

"Something like that, yeah," Hange took a cup of tea in her hands, hiding her embarrassment behind it.

"Wow... that's certainly... a lot to take in. I heard so many things about you."

"Nice ones, I hope?"

The corners of Onyakopon's lips slid down. "Not really."

"Ah... Understandable, I guess."

"But if you're the famous betrayer, why are you here? Are you—"

"We've been working together for a long time," Moblit repeated. "I trust Hange's judgement."

"I have an exceptional talent of picking out bullshit. And," Hange grinned, the curl of her lips just this side of being feral. "I'm a master of reaping fingernails out."

Onyakopon promptly chocked on the tea he was drinking. Sending her the most disappointing of his looks, Moblit jumped out from his seat to help the other man to cough it all out. His panicked face did awake a bit of shame in Hange.

"It was a joke," she hurried to assure.

"A very bad one," Moblit grumbled, softly patting Onyakopon on the back.

"I see nothing has changed about you, Hange," after returning his breathing under control, Onyakopon raised his eyes, giving her a joyful smile.

Hange wasn't sure if his words held any truth, personally, she hadn't felt like her happy, curious and driven self from years ago, but, nevertheless, she answered his smile with the one of her own.

"Now, let's talk about you," Moblit returned to his place, sitting down on the opposite side from Onyakopon. His back was straight, his expression relaxed but solemn. He grew, Hange noted absentmindedly. He was no longer that timid, shy man she had met all these years ago. "Do you know what happened with Yelena?"

"I understand that she is in the same boat as I am right now."

"Not quite," Moblit retorted. "We've recently found out that she has been talking with Eren behind our backs."

Onyakopon put the cup down, his hands a little more unsteady than Hange remembered them to be. "I... didn't know about any of this. Do you know what they were discussing?"

"Commander Pixis and the others are attempting to make sense of it as we speak."

"And in the meantime you decided to interrogate me." Onyakopon's demeanor changed, his eyes flashing. "Have I not done enough, Moblit? For you and for the people of Eldia? Haven't we helped you enough? And yet, you still don't trust me. You come here with—" his gaze shifted to Hange, but whatever Onyakopon wanted to say didn't leave his mouth, Moblit's hardened expression stopping him.

"You know how hard it is to earn trust," Moblit spoke calmly. "Especially now. Personally, I don't think that you're involved in Yelena's dealings. But I have to make sure of it. Wouldn't you do the same, if you were in my position?"

"Besides," Hange chimed in, "Even Eren is imprisoned. Do you really blame them for not trusting foreigners?"

Onyakopon took his time before answering. His jaw clenched, as he fixed his gaze on the wooden surface of the table.

"Maybe, you're right," he said at last. At his admission, Moblit relaxed. But Hange knew that Onyakopon wasn't finished yet. "But I risked my life to help get Eren back. Doesn't that count for something?"

"Yelena took part in that mission as well." Moblit reminded.

"I'm not Yelena." Onyankopon harshly retorted.

Moblit scowled. Onyakopon was glaring back at him, hands crossed on his chest. Hange decided it was time to intervene once more.

"Are we thinking of the same Yelena?" she interrupted their staring contest, easing the air around both men. "Tall, blonde and absolutely crazy?"

Not taking his eyes of Onyakopon, Moblit nodded. "She also has a strange obsession with Yeager brothers."

"Ah," yeah, Hange knew her. How could she not? Yelena was... "A lovely girl. Even I get chills from her. I doubt that Pixis would be able to get something out of her."

"That what worries me," Moblit confessed, rubbing his temples. The gesture was familiar to Hange - Moblit always suffered from headaches when under stress. "The Queen is coming back soon. If we don't secure the capital..."

"Historia is coming back?" Hange wasn't aware of it. When she asked Sasha about a little girl that once was called Christa and then grew up to become a Queen, Sasha said that she was also getting ready to become a mother. Was bringing her to the capital a good call then? With everything in such state of disarray?

"It was her decision, not ours," Moblit explained. "When the Queen learned what is going in, she deemed it necessary to intervene."

"Hopefully, the Queen is loved more than Eren Yeager."

Yeah, that would be the best case scenario. For everyone - even Marleyans - involved.

"In these uncertain times..." Moblit hanged his head with a deep, weary sigh. "Hope is all we have. Thank you for your time, Onyakopon. We'll be heading back now."

Having said that, he stood up. Hange meant to follow his suit, but at the last moment, Onyakopon stopped her, catching her sleeve between his fingers.

"About what happened in Liberio," he stiffly began. "Marley destroyed my hometown," Hange solemnly nodded. She was forced to take part in that particular operation. She hated every second of it. "I can't and I won't forgive them for that. But..." his voice softened, his thumb rubbed comforting circles around her pulse point. "Liberio was your home as well. So I know what you're going through."

Taken by surprise, Hange blinked a couple of times, gawking at Onyakopon. She expected anger from him. In the worst case - pity. But he offered her only his understanding. She was grateful for that.

“Goodbye, Onyankopon,” she smiled sweetly.

“Hopefully, that wouldn’t be our last meeting.”

Hange could very well agree on that.

___

When they were back in Sina, the sun was already setting, painting the streets and buildings into shades of orange, red and pink. While walking through the town, Hange was once again reminded of how beautiful it truly was. The abundance of trees and flower bushes, the shiny cobblestone and petite houses added to its charm, making Sina look almost magical.

“Pretty as a picture,” Hange had once called it, during a walk through the town with Levi by her side. Her fascination, that careless mishap almost got her lie uncovered.

“You look like you’re seeing it for the first time, four-eyes,” Levi had thrown that line carelessly, but his had narrowed ever so slightly and his frown had deepened. “Didn’t you say that you have grown up in the city?”

In that moment, Hange had almost started panicking. She could almost see it too – Levi finding out the truth, Levi dragging her to Erwin, Erwin getting everything he could out of her, him, Mike, Nanaba, Moblit, Nifa, Keiji, Abel, Levi and countless of others feeling disappointed and betrayed. The story would have ended with her standing on the gallows.

Perhaps, this end would have been more merciful. But that day, her joyful, only slightly forced laughter and a meaningless ‘Don’t you know me, Levi? I always have my head up in the clouds?’ had saved her from the early demise. And doomed her to many years of torture, heartache and self-hatred.

“Hey,” a gentle hand on her elbow broke her out of the internal misery. Hange looked up, meeting Moblit’s hazel eyes. “It will take some time until we reach the headquarters. Can we talk in the meanwhile?”

“Sure,” she shrugged. “What do you wish to talk about?”

“I actually want to ask a question. You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to, but…” Moblit trailed off for a moment, pressing his lips in a line. Hange smiled faintly, she knew that expression too – he always wore it when he was contemplating his next move. As soon as his mind was set, it vanished, the usual kind face returning. “I would like to know why… you came here in the first place.”

That was it? Hange almost exhaled with relief. She thought he was going to ask something truly awful.

“Didn’t I tell you already? Just like Hoover, Leonhart, Braun and Galliard, I was sent to retrieve the Founding Titan.”

“But you didn’t do it. You had countless opportunities to take Eren from us, and you never acted on any of them. So why did you really come here?”

That was… a question more complicated than Hange was ready for. She didn’t know what to tell Moblit, how much she was willing to share. She had never talked about this, not to a single soul. Her comrades and friends from Marley would never understand her anyway. But Moblit wasn’t Marleyan, he didn’t possess the same mentality. Perhaps, he wouldn’t judge her. Hange was counting on that.

Without another second spent on doubt, she began her tale,

“My father was a hero – a soldier, brilliant tactician, an even better politician. He was resolute, fearsome and absolutely merciless to his enemies. No surprise that many considered him to be an ideal Marleyan citizen. And I was his only child. Naturally, everyone expected me to be as brilliant as him. I began my training at the age of five, and by the age of twelve I was already a perfect soldier. However, that’s not who I wanted to be. I wanted to explore the world, to travel to distant lands, but as the child of my father, I had my whole life controlled by him, and then, when he passed away, by the expectations everyone had for me.”

Taking a pause, Hange chanced a look at Moblit, expecting him to be disgusted or annoyed by her whining. She had everything given to her on a plate, a bright future guarantied, and she still yearned for something more. It was pathetic, wasn’t it? She was pathetic. However, Moblit… didn’t seem to share that opinion. At least, his face didn’t show the signs of it. Instead of the outrage Hange had expected to see, she was met with sympathy.

It made the pain in her chest grew tenfold.

Nevertheless, she forced herself to continue.

“I could never decide for myself, my whole life was controlled by my father’s legacy. I wanted to break free of it, by whatever means necessary. So when I heard about the mission to retrieve the Founding Titan, I latched onto that chance, convincing the brass to send me there with the kids. But I’ve arrived earlier than them, and we got separated. And so… I decided to use that time to do what I always wanted. To study and explore.”

It was the most brilliant of her adventures. She loathed being a soldier and having to kill countless enemies of Marley. But there was no war at Paradis. The only enemies were Titans, and as much as Hange felt for their struggle, she managed to convince herself that she was killing them for their own good. That she was freeing them from their never-ending curse.

“No one knew me here, and I could be whoever I wanted to. And I liked being Squad Leader Hange, because Squad Leader Hange was allowed to be as weird and curious as I wanted. People here accepted me. For the first time in my life, I felt like I found the place where I belonged.”

Of course, that wasn’t true, a mere fantasy, a delusion on her part. She was a Marleyan, a child of the man who condemned thousands of Eldians. She had no place in their world. And yet, Hange was happy. It was the bitter truth she was afraid to admit for so long - she loved the persona of Squad Leader Hange. So much more than the persona of the Professor and war engineer, Hange Zoe.

But nothing could last forever. And when the time has come to return to Marley, Hange was devastated. She lost herself in playing her own game.

“That’s it, I guess,” she said, rolling her shoulders. Looking up, she saw they were almost by the stables where they left their horses in the morning. So deep inside her own head, she failed to notice how much time had passed. “I ran away because I was sick of my life back home. And I spent five years pretending to be someone else.”

“Were you really?” Moblit watched her, his gaze inquisitive. “Were you really pretending to be someone else, Hange-san? Or did you finally allow yourself to release your true self?”

That was… a scary statement. And much more loaded than Hange could deal with in that moment.

“I could be wrong, though,” Moblit shot her an innocent smile. Hange cursed under her breath, a true devil, that’s what he was. Getting her to admit to so much of her insecurities, Moblit surely had a talent for it. And to think he asked her to help him with interrogation. He seemed to be pretty adept at it himself.

“Stay here, I’ll bring our horses,” he started walking in the direction of the stables, but at the last moment turned away, and, meeting Hange’s eyes, added, “I’m glad that you took that mission, Hange-san. And I’m glad that I got to meet the real you. All of us are.”

Hange snorted, watching Moblit go. Perhaps, her father was right about something. Devils, all of them were. How else to explain the ease with which they wormed their way into her heart?

Her shoulders dropped as soon as Moblit had disappeared from her view, and she turned to stare at the setting sun. Certainly, it was one hell of a draining conversation.

But as her thoughts were still scattered in disarray, her heart felt so much lighter. She never shared this part of her with anyone, was afraid to admit it even to herself. But now she was glad she had finally done it. Perhaps, she should have done it a long time ago. Her life could have been easier then, the amount of regrets considerably lesser.

She swept her gaze around the plaza Moblit left her at. With the day coming to an end, not a lot of people were there. As far as Hange could see, the only ones still present were a happy mother with a two children, who were feeding the pigeons on the bench at the far side of the plaza, an elderly couple, and—

And a girl that sat at the edge of the fountain. The short stature, slumped shoulders, that luscious long black hair were familiar to the point of setting Hange's heart ablaze.

She couldn't see the face, was afraid to, but even so, Hange denied what her eyes saw. Surely, it was her imagination, her mind conjuring things that weren't there. This girl, she was—

A shadow, fathom. It couldn't be— it couldn't be her. Even the possibility of it was raising the hairs at the back of Hange's neck.

It wasn't Pieck, just a random girl. Hange was wrong, simply seeing things. Those familiar traits belonged to someone else. Pieck wasn't here, in Paradis, Pieck couldn't be—

"Hange?" she jumped, and whirled around so swiftly her head went dizzy. Before her stood Moblit, his eyebrows knitted together worriedly. "Everything alright?"

She exhaled with relief. "Peachy," she answered with a smile she didn't feel. Her eyes shifted from one side of plaza to the other, searching for the figure she had seen. But like all shadows do, she simply vanished.

"I brought our horses," Moblit gestured for her to follow him. Hange did, not looking back even once.

Even so, she felt someone's gaze burning into her back all the way to the headquarters.

___

"Sorry," Moblit stood at the threshold of her room, shifting his weight from one foot to another. "I need to report to Zacklay and Pixis."

His expression was nearly apologetic. Hange patted his shoulder, touched by his not so subtle concern. "Stop worrying so much, Mob. Nothing would happen if you leave me for one evening."

Moblit kept frowning, looking as unconvinced as ever. "I'll tell Sasha and Connie to bring you dinner,” he nodded to himself. “And if you need anything, just tell the guard to call for me."

"Alright, alright. Now go!" Hange gave him a forceful push. "And make me proud!"

She didn't get an answer out of him, but she did see a faint blush appear on his cheeks. That was enough for Hange to chuckle victoriously.

Once Moblit had disappeared around the corner, Hange shoved the door closed and leaned against it. It was an exhausting, eventful day. She wanted nothing more than to rest. She headed towards the bed to fulfill that exact goal.

But no sooner than she had seated down, she heard the knock on the door. Albeit quietly, it was repeated three more times.

Sighing, Hange stood up again and walked back to the door. She swung it open, expecting to see Sasha and Connie. She was hoping to get a warm meal inside while gossiping with the two teenagers. A second later, the door stood open. And Hange's throat was closed up.

On the other side of the threshold— there was no Sasha, no Connie. Only Pieck.

And so the shadow finally took form.

Pieck was dressed similarly to her, in the dark green uniform. Her hair was gathered in a low ponytail, a smile was playing on her lips. The subtle differences in her attire only added to the sense of disbelief.

At the sight of her lovely face, all air left Hange's lungs. She desperately tried to take a breath, opening and closing her mouth rapidly. She wasn’t sure for how long she would have continued gaping like a fish fresh out of the water hadn't Pieck taken the matters in her own hands.

"It's been a while, Hange," as always, she spoke in a quiet, sugary sweet voice. Usually it calmed Hange down. Now it was sending shivers down her spine. "Aren't you happy to see me?"

"Pieck," Hange meant to sound leveled, controlled. But even a single word came out shaky and unsure. "Pieck," she tried again, this time with more success. "What are you doing here?"

Pushing past Hange, Pieck walked inside the room, heavily sliding down on a chair. "Serving my country. Something you have forgotten about."

Pieck stared straight at her, hands folded in her lap, a picture of friendliness and innocence. But the smile Hange always found so endearing, now seemed almost chilling.

"Tell me, Hange, is this the part of your plan? Have you decided to use your old history with these people to destroy them from the inside? Or," Pieck paused, tilting her head to one side. She didn't look angry, or disappointed. If anything, she seemed simply curious. But the atmosphere in the room was tense, air electrified with trepidation. Hange knew Pieck all too well, she knew how dangerous the shifter girl could be. "Have you already forgotten what they did in Liberio, in our city? How they destroyed it? How killed thousands of men, women and children? These monsters almost killed Reiner, Porco," her voice wavered at the names of her dear comrades. But even then, she didn’t drop the unassuming façade. "And do you know what happened to Udo and Zophia? Have you seen what become of them?"

Stunned, Hange could only stare at Pieck. The words left her, her mind unable to come up with anything she could have used to explain herself.

Indifferent to Hange’s internal struggle, Pieck continued.

"Do you even care, Hange? About Marley, about us?"

"Of course, I do." How Pieck could even doubt that? Udo and Zophia, those bright, adorable children Hange couldn't quite imagine them being gone. "Pieck, you misunderstand, I've been captured, I'm not—"

"Don't make me laugh." Pieck interrupted curtly. "You have your own room, you walk freely through the town, you wear their uniform. Is this how they treat all of their prisoners? Awfully kind of them then, considering the monstrosities these devils committed."

"Pieck, listen—"

Pieck didn't want to.

"You always were a strange one, Hange," gracefully, the girl stood up, taking a step closer. With her hands behind her back, she started pacing, circling around Hange. "I could never understand what was going on inside your head. I still can't. But, naively, I thought that I knew you. That after years of fighting side by side, we grew close enough. And after the disaster at Liberio," she picked up a sheet of paper from Hange's desk, gave it a quick once over before disregarding it in favor of focusing her eyes on Hange once more. "I kept looking for you. I was so afraid to find your body under a fallen building or see you with a hole in the head. But you were nowhere to be found. Everyone was worried sick, the brass was livid - the devils from Paradis killed the Warhammer, took our Beast and now our brightest mind was missing as well. And then I remembered what I have seen during the fight. A short man approaching you, the same one who nearly killed Zeke, that Ackerman. I thought he had captured you, I thought you needed saving. Seems like I was wrong about that, huh?”

Even now, Pieck was keeping her calm. Despite the harsh accusations, her voice remained gentle, almost soothing. The smile was still in place, and her head was tilted up, peering into Hange’s eyes.

Hange did everything she could to escape that unsettling gaze.

“I also came to because I needed you,” Pieck continued. “I thought you would help me with my mission.”

Would she? Should she? Hange didn’t know. She knew what Professor Hange Zoe would have done. She knew what Squad Leader Hange would have done.

But what would she do?

“I guess it doesn’t matter. Whether you help us or not, the outcome will be the same. Paradis will fall, Hange. Consider it my only warning. If you wish to witness its demise alongside these devils, I won't stop you. But," without looking at Hange, Pieck laid a hand on her shoulder, giving it a firm squeeze. "If your decision ever changes, I'll be happy to fight by your side."

After that, Pieck left the room, closing the door softly on her way out. Hange, however, didn’t move, remaining frozen in one place, too stunned to follow after Pieck and demand a more thorough explanation.

However... what was there to explain? Paradis will fall. Plain and simple.

Right now, Hange couldn't quite believe it, although she was supposed to expect it. What could possibly happen to that little island after Eren's desperate rampage? But even before that, Paradis was already doomed. The events that transpired at Shiganshina proved to the outside world just how dangerous the Eldians could be. And Shiganshina was simply a plant that had grown out of the seed of Grisha Yeager's crimes.

There was no hope for Paradis. There never was.

Paradis will fall.

What could she do to save it? Could she do something, anything at all? Could she help them, expose her nation's plans? Could she betray her motherland like that? If she shared the truth with people of Paradis, would they even believe her? Would her people forgive her?

Hange didn't know. Her mind was in frenzy, her thoughts flying from one horrible outcome to the other. It was in that catatonic state that Sasha and Connie found her.

"Hange-san? Is everything alright?"

Hange looked up, meeting their bewildered gazes. In that moment she realized - she didn't want these kids to die. She didn't want for them to suffer any more than they've already done. And the others - Moblit, Levi - Hange couldn't bear the thought of them in harm. But—

She didn't want for her fellow countrymen to die as well.

Fuck. Why was everything so hard these days, why it was so damn complicated? When would her heart stop tearing into two pieces? Why was everything out of her control?

It was always an issue of hers, the lack of control. This time was no different. Caught between crossfires, Hange didn't know which side to choose. Perhaps then... she shouldn't choose at all.

Perhaps, she should take the back seat. Let everything transpire the way it was supposed to be. Let them fight, let someone win.

And so, with a heavy heart and troubled consciousness, Hange came to a decision. She would not alert Paradis about the threat hanging over them. She would not help Marley in their fight.

But there was another side to all of this. Another warning, another trouble that couldn’t be ignored.

There was a danger of Marley invasion, but equally disturbing was the events transpiring inside the Walls. Something was brewing, a storm ready to swipe everyone in its path. And Hange had a nasty feeling that at the center of it, two figures stood – Yeager brothers.

Nothing could be done about Eren, Hange had doubts that even his closest friends had a single clue of what was going inside the boy’s head, what dangerous ideas were forming there. But Zeke, Hange knew how to deal with Zeke. She also knew someone who could deal with him in the most efficient way.

She didn’t know what Zeke was planning. But she was confident that Levi would be able to find out.

She just needed to give him a little push.

“Sasha,” Hange smiled at the girl, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. “If you would be so kind, tell Moblit to visit me before he retires for the night.”

Moblit had mentioned that he was corresponding with Levi. The time has come to use this detail to her and the world’s advantage.

The world as they knew was changing, perhaps, it was already at the brink of collapse, horrible destruction. What did Moblit say? In these uncertain times, hope is all we have?

In that case, her only hope was Levi.