#the dark is generous and it is patient and it always wins

[the-far-bright-center]

Dystopian themes in the Prequels

“Looking back is helpful in understanding his work. Lucas started out in the 1960’s as an experimental filmmaker heavily influenced by the avant-garde films of the San Francisco art scene. Initially interested in painting, he became an editor and visualist who made abstract tone poems. His first feature, THX 1138 (1971) was an experimental science fiction film that presented a surreal, underground world where a dictatorial state controls a docile population using drugs. Love and sex are outlawed, procreation is controlled through machines, and human beings shuffle meaninglessly around the system.”

—Anthony Parisi, 'Revisiting the Star Wars Prequels'

The bolded parts in this description correspond with the Coruscant Underworld, the Jedi Order’s code, and the creation of the clone troopers, respectively.

Notably, in THX 1138's setting, emotions such as love and the concept of family are taboo:

I’ve always found it so interesting that Lucas incorporated the dystopian elements of his earlier sci-fi into the Prequels, taking place as they do in the context of the final years of the Repubic, with all its colourful and sumptuous visual spendour. In comparison, the post-apocalyptic ‘Dark Times’ of the Original Trilogy would seem on the surface to be the more outwardly ‘dystopian’ setting of the two—however, the actual story of the OT is a mythic hero's journey and fairytale, complete with an uplifting and transcendent happy ending. The OT's setting may be drained of colour, and its characters may be living under the shadow of the Empire, but as a story it is far from bleak or dystopian in tone. Rather, fascinatingly, it is the pre-apocalyptic era of the Prequels that is presented as the more dystopian storyline:

“On the surface, [The Phantom Menace] is an optimistic, colorful fantasy of a couple of swashbuckling samurai rescuing a child Queen and meeting a gifted slave boy who can help save the galaxy from the slimy Trade Federation and its Sith leaders. But beneath that cheerful facade is a sweatshop of horrors.” —Michael O'Connor, 'Moral Ambiguity: Beyond Good and Evil in the Prequels'

This is referring to the state of the galaxy during the Prequels era, including the fact that slavery is known to exist, but is largely ignored by the Republic and the Jedi alike due to being too economically inconvenient to combat. It also refers to how the Jedi of the Old Order come across as cold and distant atop their ivory tower on the artificial world of Coruscant, far removed not only from the natural world but also from the true realities of the people they claim to serve. And then there is the additional revelation in Attack of the Clones that love and family are 'outlawed' within the Jedi Order, creating an environment in which their own 'Chosen One' is unable to flourish, leaving him vulnerable to the Dark Side. Finally, there's the fact that the characters end up so distracted by fighting a civil war (something that goes against their own principles and involves the use of a slave clone army in the process), that they are blinded to the entity of pure evil that is guiding their every move...until it is too late.

“Without a clear enemy, the Jedi Order, the Galactic Senate, the whole of the Star Wars galaxy bickers and backstabs and slides around the moral scales. But there is one benefit to Palpatine’s pure evil crashing down upon the galaxy; against its oppressive darkness, only the purest light can shine through.” —Michael O'Connor, 'Moral Ambiguity: Beyond Good and Evil in the Prequels'

If anything, the Dark Times allows for the OT generation's acts of courage and heroism to flourish and succeed, because they are not hampered by the Old Jedi Order's restrictive rules, nor by its servitude to the whims of an increasingly corrupt Republic—so corrupt, in fact, that by the time of RotS, it is practically the Empire in all but name. Indeed, one of the key features of the Prequels, and what makes them so tragic, is that the characters are already living in a dystopia...they just don't know it.

There is, paradoxically, a level of freedom to be found in the midst of the Dark Times which had not been possible during the Twilight era, which allows Original Trio to rise above the tragedy that befell their predecessors. They are able to act as free agents (not as slaves of a corrupt government), serving only the fight for the liberation of all the peoples of the galaxy (not just citizens of the Republic), and are likewise free to live (and love!) on their own terms. Free to act on their positive attachments to one another, without having to hide the truth of their feelings. It's particularly telling that *this* is, above all, what makes the Prequels era so dystopian—the characters' inability to freely and openly participate in normal familial human relationships.

[septembersghost]

Not actual demon Vince Gilligan saying "it's a very dark show, there's a lot of light and fun in the making of it, which is maybe appropriate cos in the midst of darkness there needs to be a little bit of light" in this BTS video I'm watching 🤧🔫

vince is like the most wholesome, unassuming man, and he is also sent straight from the underworld to torment our psyches with agony until our final breaths.

i don't know when the video you watched is from, but that's so touchingly foreshadowing of that little flame of light and hope...and it's also one of my dearest held beliefs. we need light in the darkness! even the smallest flicker of hope. it's essential to define those edges, to find that humanity, to give us something to hold onto, to illuminate love at the heart of it all. it means everything to me and i'm endlessly thankful he understands that.

[tarothouselattier]

Describing you the way a Love interest would describe the Main character (you)

| private readings • PAC masterlist |

Pile 1 🌟

“I don’t know how she does it»

«She shines brightest in the dark”

“She is my everything”

“She is the funnest soul I’ve ever seen. She picks up her sword and shines a light ahead. She is a beacon in the darkest dark. I don’t know what I’d do without her. Without her positivity. Without her pushing me, picking me up, picking all of our spirits up. She is my everything. Evangelina(like the Star from Princess and the Frog I’m crying because there’s literally also the star card). When she’s lost on her track, reminiscing with what-ifs, I’ll be there to catch her. Not all that shines is gold and she deserves the world, and she WILL get it. Because that’s who she is, and I wanna be by her side forever. I can’t wait to see on what adventures she will take us))))”

PILE 2 ❤️☄️

Immediately I feel like you are the type of character where your love interest is like “y/n, NO!” and then you’re like “y/n, YES!!” lmaoo😂

“She is always one step ahead of everyone. She is an independent thinker. She doesn’t do what she’s told, doesn’t just take anything that’s given to her. She takes no prisoners, mainly she doesn’t imprison herself. She’s so much bigger than the world can see. She is the mastermind behind the turning of our world. This is her world and we’re just living in it.

The sparks of her youth turned into flames of wisdom, her spirit alone can hold this world together. She is the Sun. Fiery , passionate and she never gives up, she only moves and lives on.”

PILE 3 👸

Song - Dancing with the Devil by Demi Lovato.

“Out of control” Control is very important here. Immediate empress vibes. But not the vibes that the card gives, more like the Emperor. It’s giving Empress Navier from “The Remerried Empress” on Webtoon. I LOVE how you got a literal character from a comic/novel.

“She isn’t going to be controlled”.

You are very poised. Very meticulous, only the smartest of people can be the kind of virtuous that you clearly are. You know yourself but it’s like nobody can get a clear read on you. Not even me😅😅🥲

IT’S GIVING NAVIER FR OH MY GOD. Okay, so at first glance you are like a fortress, but if you let people to look deeper, you are SO nurturing, compassionate, considerate, kind to others. You’re not the only one who’s winning when you do what it is you do. You are GENEROUS with your community and loved ones. You put your all and you know how to be patient and PLAY the LONG game. You might overwork yourself and over-give yourself out of the goodness of your heart. Please rest, my Queen🥰❤��🕊️

[hidden-snow]

✦┈⋆┈ ⋞ 〈 Ｒｕｎｎｉｎｇ Ｈｏｍｅ ｔｏ Ｙｏｕ 〉 ⋟ ┈⋆┈✦

Summary // You thought your relationship was as special to him as it was to you. You thought he loved and cherished you as much as you loved and cherished him. But when his family leaves the Omatikaya and all he has to offer is ‘I’m sorry’ when you beg and plead for him to stay with you, you realize that you were so, so wrong about him. Heartbroken and defeated, a girl barely seventeen years old, you decide that you will never love again. After all, it hadn’t meant anything to him. Years later and you are the best of the best. A strong warrior and an even better hunter, you provide for your people in every way except for a child to add to the next generation of Omatikaya people. They respect your wishes but you can hear the whispers. You can feel the concerned gazes from your parents, too old to conceive a sibling to make up for your lack of children. When he comes back, it throws you through a loop. Handsome, mighty, and different, he comes to you right away. But you promised yourself.

Warnings // Angst, a bit of stalker Neteyam, some fluff, mentions of drinking, heartbreak

Word count // 1,234

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 / Part 6 / Part 7

The air felt cool and light, brushing against your skin as Danza flew high in the sky.

Your fingers outstretched, you watched with a gentle smile as your hand brushed through the light, fluffy clouds, easily parting them. If the air was cool, the clouds were even cooler.

In the night sky, Danza’s whole body was lit up in brilliant bioluminescent splotches, and the world below was lit up and full of life, something about Pandora that you would always love.

Neteyam’s ikran flew close to yours, chirping and calling softly to Danza as its mount attempted to keep up with your fast flying and crazy maneuvers.

You’d meant what you said; you didn’t want to talk to him. Insistent as he was, even if he had a chance at helping you fall for him again, jealousy still sat, harbored deep in your heart, making it nearly impossible to look at him without feeling the heat of anger begin charging within your chest.

You couldn’t love someone you harbored hatred for. It wouldn’t be fair to him or yourself.

“Y/n! How about a race? You and me. Just like before,” Neteyam offered when he finally caught up with you. You thought about it for a moment, skeptical, before raising an eyebrow at him.

“What’s the catch?”

“There’s no catch,” Neteyam laughed back and you rolled your eyes at the seemingly innocent suggestion he’d made.

“There’s always a catch with you, Neteyam te Sulli Tsyeykitan. What is it?”

“Alright. Alright, true,” the young man responded, hands raising in the air in a ‘you caught me’ gesture.

“Winner gets to pick what we’ll be eating for supper tonight.”

“And the loser?” you ask, ignoring the fact that he was implying that you’d even sit with him to eat together.

“Loser has to eat it, no complaints.”

“Not worth it,” you respond and he gives you an exasperated look.

“Alright. What do you suggest loser does?”

“Loser has to do whatever the winner wants them to do. So, when I win, if I tell you to leave me alone, you have to do it.”

“For how long?”

You nibble on your lip in thought for a moment before returning your straying attention to him.

“For as long as the winner wants.”

Neteyam fell silent, thinking it over, and you take the chance to look at him. The moonlight on his skin illuminated the rippling muscles in his body, his frame still on the smaller side compared to his father.

Bioluminescent spots glitter and flicker with light in the darkness, a stark contrast on his face compared to the black tattoos that ink his blue skin.

He was handsome and he seemed to only get more handsome the longer you looked at him. So you didn’t. Turning away, you waited patiently for his answer.

“Alright. Deal. Just know this means I’m definitely going to win.”

“Dream on, Neteyam! You haven’t bested me in a race since we first started riding the skies!” you respond teasingly, and he rolled his eyes at your response.

“We’ll see who gets the last laugh. I’ll see you back at hometree, then!”

He’s off before you have a moment to realize what he said. But you were determined to beat him. After all, you couldn’t stand to watch him flirt with one more woman. Not while you were trying to decide where exactly your heart was leaning towards when it came to him.

You spur your ikran onward, focused and determined, avoiding all of the possible obstacles that could slow you down. You were almost there. Almost side-by-side with Neteyam when he cheats. Or, that’s how you would interpret it. He smiles a crooked smile as you finally catch up to him and you can’t help but raise your eyebrow at him. That smile. The crooked grin, similar to his little smirks he gave when he was about to cause trouble for you.

His ikran dove towards yours and you veer off course, trying to steady your ikran the best you could.

“Hey! That’s cheating, you skxawng!” you shout, trying to catch back up with him. There’s no point. He lands before you do. He beat you.

As you dismount, you pat your ikran’s neck gently, rewarding her with some fish in a basket nearby, before stalking up to your childhood friend.

“You cheated!” you hiss, annoyed and frustrated by his childish antics. He just laughs, shaking off your anger. After all, it was hard to take you serious when you were like this; all puffed up in anger despite the height differences between you two.

“I didn’t cheat if there were no rules. Which, there were not any rules. So, I won.”

He got you there. He had a fair point. You scoff, hands falling to your hips, and he watches silently as you mutter to yourself in annoyance of your little forgetfulness. Of course, he’d pull something like that without rules! How could you have been so careless?

“Y/n, you have to do what I say, remember?”

You look back at him, mid-rant, and sigh in defeat.

“Alright, Neteyam. You won. What is it that you want?”

“Well…”

He takes a couple steps towards you, closing the distance so that you were basically chest-to-chest, staring down in your eyes with a softness that only he seemed to contain. A softness that brought a bit of warmth to your stone-cold heart.

“I want you to kiss me.”

“W-what?”

You’re not sure you heard him clearly. At least, until he slides his fingers up, cupping your jaw gently, keeping you from turning away from him. You’re frozen in your spot, fighting eternally with yourself.

Should you turn away? Should you allow him to do as he wished? After all, he’d won a bet you’d agreed on. You weren’t one to back out on a promise. You give in, just letting it happen, swearing up and down that no matter what, you wouldn’t let yourself fall in love. Not with him. It didn’t matter if he was a good kisser, though you had a feeling he was. It didn’t matter if he touched you like you were the most special person in the world. It didn’t matter.

Because when you needed him most, he left you behind like garbage.

Bracing yourself, you close your eyes as you feel his lips lightly brush against yours, almost like the ghost of a kiss, barely there.

His thumb rubs your jaw gently before he’s pulling back, still staring at you as if awestruck by you. His thumb skims over the plump of your lips before he draws back completely.

“I guess I didn’t finish what I said, did I?” he asks as he crosses his arms, watching you try to make sense of this whole situation.

“I want you to kiss me. But only when I’ve finally won your heart again. I’m not going to force you to do anything you don’t want to do. I’m not going to kiss you because of some bet. Right now, you still feel very little for me. One day, hopefully, you will kiss me when you truly feel something for me. Until then, I’ll be waiting.”

He brushed past you gently, heading back to the common area where the people talked and relaxed, leaving you staring blankly ahead of you, still trying to figure out what the hell just happened.

Taglist // @earthling55

[in1-nutshell]

Hi I love your work how would the tfp bots react to meeting a bot that has the personality of wendsday Addams

Wednesday Addams is a good character to put into Buddy. This was fun to write and think about. Here are the Autobots reaction to Wednsday Bot Buddy!

Hope you enjoy!

Autobots reacting to Bot Buddy with the personality of Wendsday Addams

SFW, platonic, slight dark themes mainly on general themes of murder and dark humor, Nothing graphic just mentions here and there, Cybertronian/ Bot reader

TFP

Optimus Prime

*Looks at dead Vehicon* “Lucky bot.”

*Concern truck noises*

Optimus is a bit concerned about the dark nature of Buddy.

He doesn’t question their allegiance. He knows that Buddy is a loyal Autobot through and through. If they wanted to be a Decepticon they would have already done it, but they haven’t. Being able strategist, Buddy truly helps when planning attacks accordingly.

They just have a peculiar taste in humor and in personality.

Optimus won’t interfere with Buddy and their passions… unless he deems it necessary.

They are just another one of his children with a different hobby than the rest.

Ratchet

“I’m fine Doctor. They only hit a major fuel line. I’ve only entered the first stage of paralyzes, it’s quite pleasant.”

“I’m sorry WHAT WAS HIT!?”

He is a bit wary of Buddy. It’s mainly their view on murder.

He doesn’t mind the dark humor or the occasional weird vibe they give off. They help Ratchet around in the lab and in any experiments since Buddy has a natural talent for science. Though he does get a bit annoyed whenever they bring up the supernatural around him.

Buddy is a regular patient in the medbay due to the fact that they downplay their injuries so much that sometimes he doesn’t even know if they get injured on purpose.

He has to physically check Buddy for any injuries whenever they leave the base. It’s a rule now, not even Optimus can stop him now.

Bumblebee

*Pointing blaster to a Vehicon* “No one gets to torment my family except for me.”

“Beeeep. Bep beep? (Aww you do care—wait what?)”

He looks up to Buddy in a way. Buddy is the oldest of the youngest group on the team. Meaning they are older than Smokescreen by default, older than Bee. Even though the three of them came from the same generation, Buddy is the older sibling.

He can tell the war did a number to Buddy over the eons, but Buddy also always had a peculiar personality that set them apart from everyone else.

He is glad that Raf has taken a liking to Buddy and vice versa. Whenever he is too busy to pick up Raf from school, he can count on Buddy to go and pick him up safe and sound.

He knows that Buddy means well in the end… its just the lengths they are willing to go and the lines they are willing to cross to do it makes him uneasy. Bumblebee knows that he can trust Buddy with his life and will do it without a second thought.

Arcee

“Time to go spider hunting.”

“I couldn’t agree more.”

She doesn’t mind Buddy as a whole.

Yes, their personality isn’t something that everyone sees and associates with Autobot, but they mean well.

She is willing to defend Buddy for that.

She does get worried about Buddy when they go out into battle. She is mainly worried that one day she or one of her teammates would accidentally hit Buddy since their frame has Con written all over it.

She trusts Buddy with Jack whenever she isn’t available. At first Jack isn’t too thrilled at the idea of being with this bot that looks like they would murder him if they ever got bored. But he gets over that initial fear after a bit of one-on-one time with Buddy. Arcee is happy for both.

The sass battles between these two can get heated and brings the team to becoming the audience.

Arcee tried a dark humor battle with Buddy. It happened only once because Arcee soon realized that Buddy had a bottomless pit full of this humor. There was no way she was going to win.

Bulkhead

“Nice knife you got there. That would be absolutely great in playing autopsy.”

“Playing What!?”

Oh yeah Buddy does not put him at ease at all. Sure, as a Wrecker he too dabbles in dark humor, but Buddy is on a whole new level of dark humor.

He would hate to see what would happen if Buddy turned to the Cons side. But time and time again, he is proven wrong about them ever defecting. Especially when Buddy has a huge sift spot for the kids, Miko begins the biggest.

Miko absolutely adores this bot. She has asked Bulkhead if he cannot pick her up or Wheeljack to let Buddy pick them up.

Buddy has been named her unofficial official “Sibling from another planet”.

Buddy doesn’t seem to mind so he is fine about that. He does get a bit uneasy about the lengths they are willing to go to fulfill a plan, but other than that he is fine with them.

Wheeljack

“You okay there, kid? You look half dead.”

“I’m always half dead Wheeljack.”

Oh yeah finally someone who can get some of his humor.

He dabbles a bit more in the dark humor than most other bots on the team, still nowhere near Buddy’s level but he can appreciate their artform.

He will defend Buddy against anyone who says that they should be in the Autobot ranks because of their personality. Not everyone is perfect, and they have a choice on which side they want to fight, and they have always chosen the Autobots even when things seem hopeless.

Wheeljack has worked with Buddy in making his famous homemade grenades. Buddy is one of the few bots he will allow to fly the Jackhammer by themselves.

While he isn’t around the base too often, he always finds it funny to have Buddy sneak up on him by accident. Not many can do that, so he finds it funny.

Smokescreen

“Have you tried doing another paint job that isn’t Black? You know, bright that color scheme a bit.”

“When they have a shade darker than black let me know.”

Smokescreen looks at Buddy with admiration and fear.

On one hand, he knows that he could jump off the Nemesis blindly with Buddy and Buddy would somehow save them both while still doing their jokes midair.

On the other hand

He isn’t a fan of their dark humor or dark personality. It reminds him too much of the Cons. The first time that he met Buddy, he nearly shot them thinking they were a Con. There was an apology afterwards.

He does not question Buddy’s side in the war for a second. Sure, they look like they could end his life with a spoon, but they haven’t and that proves the point.

Ultra Magnus

“How is the investigation coming along soldier?”

“There are so many threads in this investigation I’d have enough to weave my burial shroud and Bumblebee’s.”

“What?”

“BEEEP! (WHAT!?)”

Not a fan of their personality.

He would have put them on the same list of non-compliant soldiers as Wheeljack. But despite a few bumps here and there, Buddy is a true Autobot and lives by the code, to a point.

They are actually one of the few Autobots that have managed to follow must his plans. And has some respect for authoritative figures.

Or that might be just him and Optimus. He respects them that much. Not a fan of dark humor or personality, mainly because it isn’t his taste in humor.

[bakubunny]

I'm here to beg for daddy fumi hcs 😵‍💫

-Jasmina🌸

okay so i said i’d share smth but like honestly i feel like i’m repeating myself at this point so i hope you enjoy anyways. thx love!

i said this before but fumi likes frilly dresses. and chunky mary jane shoes with buckles. and pretty socks. and allllll of the little garb you can conjure up. more specifically, he likes to be the one to dress you up because it’s another show of how needy and good you are for him.

fumi doesn’t mind and even enjoys half or fully clothed sex because he can still see how sweet you look in that little dress and cute shoes if he doesn’t take them off. bonus points if he gets to rip through those pretty little tights or panties.

he’s got that soft yet firm voice down to a science. he knows how to teach and guide you. redirects gently most of the time unless you need more.

fumi is definitely the kind of dom who has to do no more than lift your chin and give you a look to redirect you, but he’ll often say something anyways. “princess…. try again, little one. show daddy the good girl i know and love.”

he loves it when you ask for something instead of bratting; doe eyes and a sweet tone of voice are an instant turn on. he won’t let you get away with things you shouldn’t, but good behavior from sweet little girls is almost always rewarded.

furthermore, he loves it when you talk around your hand or whatever’s in your mouth. i’ll let you decide why, but i think there’s more than one reason.

saying it again: he’s got a wall display of impact tools and ropes in various lengths, colors, types. while he does like paddles, he’s got a good collection of floggers, leather straps, canes, switches, non traditional implements, whips…. some of them match his aesthetic (dark and finely crafted), but he’ll let you get something pretty you like every now and then for him to use on you.

he’s arguably the most patient dom around. if you win an argument, it’s because he allows it and not because he’s given in. do with that information what you will.

fumi buckles you in the car, ties your shoes if they come undone, fixes your hat when it’s cold out, etc. generally big on casual dominance and doing things for you.

fumi cooing sweet words while dark shadow talks about how they both really feel…. dark shadow is the one who perhaps encourages fumi’s “mean”/rough side to come out.

“daddy loves you, angel…. you’re so pretty like this, all for me….” while he’s wrecking your shit. and i’ll leave it at that.

eta: he loves begging. encourages it.

age play. and cute pull ups. and sippies. i’m stopping while i’m ahead. but he loves how innocent you look.

he’s that dom who takes you to a local dungeon. and everyone watches his work. no i will not elaborate at this time. >.<

@heartofjasmina

[yanderes-galore]

I Simp for peach and bowser XD now I’m wondering how would it go if their were Yandere rivals who trying to win the reader hand in married 🤣 would their still be rivals or work together and come a poly 😝

I am such a Bowser fan so sure, lol. I need to give Peach some attention on here anyways. This is general but leans more game-based.

Yandere! Peach vs Bowser

Pairing: Romantic - Rivalry

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Manipulation, Kidnapping, Mentions of marriage, Forced marriage, Rivalry, Jealousy, Obsession, Forced relationship implied, Violence.

This is actually a pretty neat pairing.

You most likely knew Peach first and you're a "human" (?) like her.

You are close friends with the princess and her valiant heroes, Mario and Luigi.

Her obsession would be more likely to spark first as she doesn't need to kidnap you to fall for you.

You just visit her castle for chat and she can't help but fall for your voice.

Peach often plans to bake you cakes and you two are usually seen alone.

You just like to think you're best friends with the princess, completely unaware of her dark intentions when she looks at you.

You're so innocent... you don't have a clue she intends to marry you in the future.

Peach would be Manipulative, Caring, Obsessive, Delusional, Patient, Protective, yet Temperamental at times.

This is different than Bowser, who's Possessive, Impatient, Protective, Caring, Persistent, and Intimidating.

Although the two DO share the Protective and Caring trait despite their differences.

Due to them sharing this trait, when the rivalry eventually starts, they theoretically could share.

That's challenged by Bowser's impatient and possessive trait, however.

How this may start is with Peach, as said before.

The princess had fallen for you when she first met you.

You had helped the Mushroom Kingdom a few times before from other threats such as Bowser.

You didn't often fight but you did hand the two plumber brothers info you could snag.

Since then you often visited Peach, either invited or checking in to make sure she's safe.

Peach finds your care for her flattering.

You don't just care for her as a princess... you care for her as a close friend and ally.

The princess often tries to make herself look her best around you and always asks what your favorite treats are.

If you don't like cake she tries to practice making other things.

Peach is a yandere who thrives on physical contact.

Expect to be bombarded with hugs and friendly kisses on the cheek or forehead as greeting.

It's her form of getting the hint across.

Peach often bribes you to stay in her castle, using the excuse of you making her feel safe.

Peach would he manipulative due to the power she has in her kingdom.

If she did ask for your hand in marriage, there's a lot of pressure on you.

For the most part Peach is subtle with her manipulation.

She wants to make you fall for her without forcing a betrothal first.

Peach is incredibly caring to your needs.

She has wealth and a spacious castle... completely surrounded by mushroom servants loyal to her orders.

Don't you feel at home here?

She can get you whatever you wish... all the gifts and affection you could ever want....

She's patient yet delusional.

If you turned her down when she asks for your hand, she excuses it as you being shy or nervous.

It's fine if you're not ready yet...

She can wait until you are!

Although... constant/frequent rejection can make her irritated.

She may hit a breaking point if you keep ignoring her.

Lastly, Peach is protective.

For good reason, too, as soon she'll realize she's not the only one in danger...

Turns out, Bowser doesn't want Peach as his little special one now.

Which should be a relief to the princess, right?

Wrong.

That's because she learns you're his new target.

Bowser's obsession probably starts more after he kidnaps you.

Maybe he met you when you were helping Mario and Luigi one time and couldn't stop thinking about you?

The Koopa King is lonely... normally he kidnaps Peach to help with that.

But maybe his attempts with you will be different?

This could go two different ways.

Bowser kidnaps just you...or he kidnaps Peach and you by accident, which sparks his obsession.

If he kidnaps just you, it becomes very similar to the Bowser concept here.

He intends to have you help with his children and keep him company.

He is awfully impatient with waiting for you to love him.

Once he's attached he dreads the idea of letting you go or giving you up.

He's also protective, especially when Mario and Luigi show up to take you back.

Despite his intimidating strength, height, and persistent behavior... he's caring.

He truly just wants affection, and unlike Peach, you may just give it to him.

He had no idea the reason Peach didn't reciprocate was because she liked you.

Bowser isn't mad at you for stealing Peach's attention... he understands, honestly.

But now he's mad at the princess, causing the rivalry.

If you were the only one kidnapped, Peach will help Mario and Luigi to save you.

Peach's determination surprised the brothers when she asked to help get you back.

They probably don't know how obsessive she is with you.

Peach is determined to drag you back from that overgrown lizard no matter what happens.

Meanwhile, Bowser is determined to defend you and your "relationship" with his life.

He's already planned a wedding outfit for the both of you and gave flowers!

Then there's if he accidentally kidnaps you both.

This way keeping you is unintentional, but Peach desperately pleads with Bowser not to hurt you.

So he relents and allows your presence.

This is another way he can become obsessed.

Originally he thinks Peach is the one for him.

He pours all of his affection and attention into Peach, said princess ignoring it in favor of pouring hers into you.

At first, Bowser doesn't notice the attraction Peach has for you.

That is until he falls for you and notices how Peach acts around you.

How could he be so blind?

Peach loves you... but you don't love her like that...

Which means he must have a chance!

Expect fighting when they both find out they have a crush on you.

It's mostly verbal but they certainly don't get along.

Peach screams that he'll hurt you by accident!

Bowser growls that she's been so rude to him, she has Mario and Luigi, why does she need to have you?

They both want to marry you, a choice that intimidates you.

Peach promises you'll be her adored royal consort in the Mushroom Kingdom!

Everyone will love you.

Bowser claims, with a bit of an ego, that you'll be the fearsome consort of his Koopa Kingdom!

Everyone will fear you and him!

Peach wants to dress you in white with fire flowers for your wedding...

Bowser wants you in white too, but with pirahna plants for your wedding...

They fight and fight.

When Mario and Luigi eventually show up for the rescue of you and the princess, they're met with the two arguing over you.

They're confused but try to rescue you both anyways.

Even if they shared they'd still have fights over wedding plans and lack of attention.

The two royals would probably war with each other over something as simple as who you like more.

Truth is, after what you've seen, you're scared of both.

It's best you move away or hide someplace, honestly.

If you run from them who knows when they'll stop chasing you.

This rivalry could tear kingdoms apart... it's best you try to stay out of it in the end.

"Love, why do you look so scared? Bowser's the bad guy here... I'm just trying to make you happy!"

"Dear, don't look so sad... our kingdom will be the best in the land with you on my side!"

[midntarot]

[ pick a pile ]

what should i let go?

disclaimer: this is a general reading. take what resonates, leave what doesn’t. tarot isn’t meant to dictate or predict, but rather to provide insight. 

how to choose your pile: intuitively choose the photo that you feel the most drawn to.

⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡ pile 1:

let go of restraints. pull yourself out of these restraints you’ve given yourself. break out of your routine. don’t be so rational all the time and allow yourself to feel your emotions. you’ve been wanting to break in a new cycle, find a new opportunity to change things around, or to freely express yourself. to achieve this, you need to allow yourself to feel your emotions, be in tune with what you feel and how you perceive it. take a step back and really evaluate your feelings about certain things, events, or situations. don’t be too hasty about your actions and don’t be too impulsive. because you are too used to routines, you feel like you may expect the same outcome for every step you take. no, this time, take your time. indulge yourself. immerse yourself in everything you can. 

you are: the forest. – indulge deep into the darkness. feel your goods. feel your bads. take your time to scour this entire place. discover the known and the unknown, and make peace with it.

⋆｡ ﾟ☾ pile 2:

let go of control. though you have achieved very much or have big dreams and are taking steps to achieve them, you need to remember that taking control of your life may make it stagnant instead. let the way of the worlds dictate your life. flow freely with it and let in whatever comes your way. absorbing these events, emotions, and people like how you absorb the sun rays will enhance you as a person. it will propel you straight to your goals. remember not to feel discouraged if things are not going your way. cherish every moment you encounter, all the people who supported you on your journey, and the experiences and skills you’ve gained. though some moments may feel like it’s no use, every moment of it counts. it may feel like you’ve done this all by yourself, but remember all the help along the way.

you are: the unseen. – your guides are near. the doors to the path you’ve been wanting is slowly opening ajar. though you can’t see these forces quite well, they are watching you and they are guiding you. be patient. you’re almost there.

*:･ﾟ✧ pile 3:

let go of your impulsive habits. this is particularly speaking to your spending habits. there is an abundance of wealth coming your way, whether that be a job promotion, being hired at a higher paying job, winning the lottery, etc. any source of wealth it comes in, is coming for you. when this comes, however, do not let the numbers get to your head. do not spend your money hastily and remember where you’ve come from. you’ve worked so hard to get to where you are and to secure yourself a place in this world, but don’t lose sight of yourself. sure, you’ve finally made enough to support yourself and be able to buy things you want. but, remember, you’ve been secured and have always been financially independent. your work has paid off, but don’t let this money consume you.

you are: the cave. – remember your rock, a place that reminds you of your inner self, a place where after you’ve fallen, you can go back to and feel content and loved. remember your roots, where you’ve came from and what or who shaped you as a person. the cave is a place of a darkness, but a comforting kind of darkness – somewhere you can rest until you’re ready to pick yourself up again and move. 

「source and credits: all photos were found on pinterest, therefore we do not own any of them. credits goes to the rightful owner of these photos」

© midntarot, all rights reserved

[moonstruckloverwritings]

Hello could you do yandere bayverse tmnt x reader poly headcanon please, like how they first meet the reader, how they share the reader, do they fight over there reader, how they finally got the reader, does April, casey, and vern help them, does or how the reader escape them ect.

Poly! Yandere! Bayverse! TMNT X Reader General Headcanons

Authors note: okay so first off, the request was a lot of different topics but I decided to just put them all one one post with different categories. Adding the categories makes it easier to hone in on each question. And second, the song I picked for how they are with reader is actually more based off of Mikey and Raph. I don’t think Donnie or Leo would be that open about it. But I couldn’t really find one that suited them. Sorry. Anyway, I hope you like it! And sorry it took me so long to get to it!

How you met:

With them being who they are.. there’s a couple ways they could have met the reader.

First one is they simply see you during their patrols. They see you walking home and just fall in love with you or..

They could save you. They could be out doing patrols or on a mission and hear you cry for help from being mugged. And when they go to save you.. they fall in love. Or..

April and or Casey introduces you to them. They didn’t know it would end in such a dark way but maybe thought you all would be friends.

And for as how they get you, they end up kidnapping you after a long conversation. I don’t think Donnie or Mikey would like the idea but they end up falling in line with Raph and Leo who do think that it’s the best way.

How they share you:

It won’t be easy. Especially with Raph and Leo.

Mikey is really clingy and wouldn’t mind sharing you but would still be glued to your side while you hang out with others. Unless you asked him to go away. He wouldn’t go if his brothers asked him. It would have to lead to a bit of a spat and them raising their voice. Then he’d pout and give in.

Donnie could share you probably the easiest. Not that he didn’t absolutely love having you around but he’d have times that he’s better on his own, aka, when he’s working. When he’s inventing things or doing experiments he’d prefer you be safe with one of his brothers so you don’t get hurt.

Raph is a mix of both.. there’s times he can be without you but that doesn’t mean he likes it when others are with you. He’s insanely jealous. If he sees others getting to close to you (especially Leo) he will get angry and ask if he’s bothering you. If you say no, he will huff and begrudgingly stomp away. If you say yes, prepare for the them to brawl over you. He’s also insanely protective. Once he’s reminded that they agreed to share you and that no one’s going to hurt you, he can calm down again and allow it. But he still doesn’t like it.

Leo will follow you around much like Mikey will but more in a protective way. While Mikey will follow you around like a homeless puppy looking for cuddles, Leo prefers to follow you around to observe you and others around you. He wants to know you’re always safe and happy and cared for. It’s what he lives for. He’d be hurt if you said you didn’t like it or didn’t want him doing it anymore. He would take that as a rejection of him completely. But he is patient and understanding. So he can share you but he won’t leave you.

Does April or Casey help?:

Honestly.. April might. She would either help the turtles get you or “not want to be involved” but she wouldn’t call the cops or help you. I mean it wouldn’t be smart for one petite girl to go up against 4 giant turtles who know martial arts. She wouldn’t help you.

Casey might help you. He would either acknowledge it is wrong but wouldn’t fight the turtles or he would actively try to get you out of there. But if he picked the ladder.. he wouldn’t win. He would end up being 💀 before the sun rose. The turtles don’t play around when it comes to you.

Could you escape?:

I’m gonna be honest, you’re not leaving. Not when Leo nor Mikey refuses to leave your side. There isn’t an opportunity for you to even escape let alone it actually being successful. So basically once they fall in love with you.. your life is pretty much over.

[keen-li]

Only one | 03

Series Warnings: toxic relationship trauma, trauma in general, mentally broken oc, manipulation, yendere jungkook.

Psychiatrist jungkook x patient reader

Chapter warnings : panic attack, drugging.

. . .

"I wont be here next month"

She raises a brow at you.

"Y/n I hope you aren't trying to hurt yourself" the concerned look in her face has you chuckling.

"No no no, I'd never do that" you laugh awkwardly.

"And this is why I need you to keep this secret"

She nods and nudges for you to speak.

"Mr Jeon is gonna help me get out of this place" you say smiling and excited but she doesn't share your excitement.

"What?" You look brows furrowed her "Are you worried about yourself"

"I'm actually gonna ask if Mr jeon can also hel-" You say excitedly.

"Leave me out of it" She says a little aggressive which takes you back. You squint your eyebrows at her hoping to see what she might be hindung behind those eyes.

"What? What's wrong?"

"I don't think you should do it, you don't know Mr jeon" she lifts her eyes to stare at you.

"He said that he's gonna take me home"

"And what guarantee do you have? Huh" her voice rises. You stay silent not knowing what to say. You jnow it's kind of a stupid thing to do but you believe Mr jeon (even though you have no reason to.)

"You aren't even sure, he told you he'd take you home and you believed? "

"Y/n you need to say no to him" she says now sounding more fearful and worried.

"Why? You don't want me to leave this place."

"I do want you and I to leave here one day but not like this"

"Well I'm gonna do it, I don't wanna stay here any longer " you made your mind up, she doesn't bother to argue just staring at you and rolling her eyes. She knows there's no way she's gonna convince you otherwise.

She knows how convincing Mr Jeon can be, how he can lure you into a trance even the smartest would fall for.

After all she was once a fool too.

But she's gonna try and stop you from doing what you want to do. In her own way of course.

........

"I heard you had a carnival" he turns to face you "Did you have fun?" He smiles

"Yes I did. It was absolutely amazing" you start to describe the event and how you felt about it excitedly.

"I even got this bracelet but I didn't even win" you say showing him the bracelet.

"I wanted a panda but I didn't get one" you pout.

"That's okay" he comforts you.

"Show me your wrist" he commands as he takes your wrist into his hand after you hand it to him. You can feel the electrons from his hand to all over your body. His touch is warm and comfortable; like a dream, a melody.

"Very pretty" he says deeply staring at your hand then he moves to your wavering eyes that were perfectly accompanied by your eyelashes. Your face blessed with the most gorgeous features he's ever seen.

"The bracelet is very pretty" voice soft as your eyes are still connected.

You smile awkwardly and pull your wrist from his grip. You tend to pull away from men and their advances, you don't need a 14th reason or another 13th reason.

"I've been looking at it ever since I got it" your tone very gentle and soft and it lands warmly into jungkook's ears. His lips pull at your delicate voice.

After a moment of silence and a couple of minutes waiting for him to get your session in progress you decide to speak up but he cuts in.

"So have you been a good girl " he leans against the table hands gripping each side of the table.  You're taken back by his straight forwardness and the sudden question.

"I-i. Yes. Yes I have" you stutter and play with your fingers, you can feelyiur throat clog with nerves. He notices your little movements, of course he does he always does. Letting go of the table and putting his hands in his pocket, his feet move step by step until he's directly in front of you. The way he towers over you makes you even more nervous, he knows he's intimidating  and he loves it. He loves watching you quiver under his lowered dark gaze, hands in his pockets to make him look bigger ,badder. He bends his head to look down at you and his sleeked back hair doesn't dare to fall.

"Have you been a good girl" his voice is soft and silky, it's as low as his gaze. You aren't able to look at him because this is one of the things that scare you. Your ex did this a lot, stood over you to make you scared and show you how bad he is. So you're very anxious when jungkook stands over you like this, he doesn't even stumble, his figure as stiff as a pole. He notices your uneasiness and chuckles. You wonder if he knows how he's affecting you by doing this and if he does; does he enjoy it.

And so to get your eyes on him, he really wants your eyes on him. He uses his pointer and middle finger to lift your head and your eyes finally meet his.

There you go sweet, you can do it. Keep the eye contact.

"Have you?" He nudges your chin. You can't find the confidence to speak feeling kinda like how you did when you were with your ex. Does he do this with his other patients? Is it even professional? These are the questions you should be asking yourself but your mind can't seem to ponder any longer on logical thoughts.

So you nod, you just nod. Slowly and surely and those beautiful eyes stare at jungkook deeply.

You look so good from this angle.

He chuckles his thoughts away. Then he moves away from you, showing you his glorious back. You feel like you can finally breath. He takes his seat on his chair and pulls out his note book and scribbles something.

"You're leaving at the end of the week" he spits his voice going back to its professional tone.  "So you better get packing"

You honestly should've been happier, excited even. But you aren't, not fully atleast.

....

"Have you got everything?" The nurse asks you as you zip up your bag.

"Yeah" the weight of the bag over your shoulder pulls you down slightly.

The nurse mumbles an OK and guides you to the front desk. You look back into your room, you wish you could say bye to sicily but you're not sure where she is, so you'd settle with leaving her a note.

You walk slowly and a little gloomy as you spot Mr Jeon by the front desk signing some papers. He looks over to you and says something to the lady behind the desk which makes her laugh. By the way she laughs you know she's trying to be sexy and appeal to Mr jeon but he doesn't pay mind to her advances.  He instead turns to you as you stand by him and gold your bag closer.

"How are you feeling?" He asks in his Mr jeon voice.

"I'm okay" you say not sounding okay at all.

"Just sign here miss and you'll be all done" he lady behind the desk hands you a paper and pen. You take it and as you're ready to sign where she directed you to, you pause when you notice something.

Name of care giver: jeon jungkook

You blink twice and before you sign you look at him with a raised brow.

"Since when are you my caretaker" you wonder why he put his name there when he could've just left it blank, noting you as independent.

"You need someone looking after you so you can leave" he sounds like he couldn't care for your concern.

"You could've called my mom" you say.

"Did you want that?" His sharp tone lands in your ears, his persona faltering a bit as he stares at you darkly hoping you'd just shut up and make this process less tiresome.

You actually wouldn't want your mother to pick you up, you'd rather just stay here then.

You stay quiet as you sign the paper for your freedom.

"Lets go" Mr jeon says turning his back to you, body insinuating that you should follow him. Which you do.

His firm and stone-built figure guides you out of the hell hole you've been in. The sun and air have never felt so good, it feels like a fresh start. You're hopeful  and you've already been thinking about what your gonna do when you finally get to go to your own home and have your little pets running around.  You're so excited.

Your heart feels heavy as Mr jeon has the door of his hyundai open for you to enter.  You don't know why it feels so heavy on your chest to not enter his car, he couldn't do anything to you he's trying to help anyways. Ignoring the ringing bells in your mind you enter his car, your body mentally and physically shudders as he slams the door shut. You just pin it down to the anxiety of finally being back in society and having to regain yourself, even though both you and Mr jeon know you aren't fully well, you should be well enough to survive. Right? You hope.

You aren't going to leave .

You aren't leaving me.

You're not going anywhere, you're staying with me forever.

The ringing and voice in your head start to get louder, your chest falling and raising faster than the sun. You were ignoring it scared that he'd make you go back to the repetitive life of the hospital. You clutch the sides of your head trying to stop it, stop his voice from ringing reminders,  reminders of his ownership over you.

You can't be having an episode right now, you're going to end up back in the hospital. You can't end up back in there, all Mr Jeon's efforts and yours would go in the drain; you might even get him fired. You don't want that, he's trying to help you. All these thoughts fuel your heaving.

"Its okay you're not going to end up back there" you hear Mr jeon voice and for a second you thought you heard the devil's voice but your mind was playing tricks in you. You've been so caught up with yourself and your thoughts that you didn't realize you were speaking out loud and he had already closed his door. His hands on your skin try to calm you.

You push his hands away from you. You didn't like being touched during these moments. Every touch felt like a hot scalding slap, a reminder of your worthlessness to your mind. A reminder that you might never escape this reality of yours, being trapped like a bird in a cage set and bound to die that way.

"Take these" Mr jeon hands you two pills and a bottle of water. You've never seen these pills, with the way you had to take medicine you've mastered every name, colour and design of every pill and recognising every purpose they serve is your talent.

But these, you've never seen these. They're small circular and white (generic), their small size may fool other people of their strength but what you've realized over the past months is that the small, boring looking pills are always the most effective and dangerous. And whatever these little pills are they're no joke.

A little skeptical and nervous you stare at Mr jeon who's gaze feels like the morning sun revealing the stains on your white garment. He nods to you comforting you that it's okay to take them.

"They're a new batch, I think they'll help you calm down" he smiles no joy behind his smile. Why does it feel suffocating to be around him now, you'd never tell him that but he's probably already noticed it with the way your iris shakes when you stare at him.

"They are now part of your prescription" he informs you. One of his conditions was that you'd keep taking medication, you were okay with that. But you're kind of confused why he's adding a new drug, you were responding well to the others. So why the new addition? These are the thoughts you should be pondering but your mind never allows you to.

Relax you they do, a little too well. You can barely feel your muscles, the only feeling you feel being the tingling at the end of your fingers and toes, just to assure you that you're still alive in your human form. You've never been this relaxed, your mind is numb and dull; no thoughts. Only the little pictures of the nature you see appear in your mind. You surely were right those little pills were hazardous,  you hope to remember to ask him what they are later. You doubt you'll remember anything after this.

You watch the scenes pass by, then you hear Mr Jeon's voice speak. Its so distorted that you aren't even sure if he's the one speaking, but your body can barely react or question.

"Feels good doesn't it?" the grin on his face is audible.

Your eyes flicker from dark to light; leaning more to darkness. You can't stop the feeling as you feel darkness slowly consume you. You try and move your hands for him to reach out and help you but his are clenched around the steering.

"Ah-" you let out in a stuttered whisper. You're calling out to no one, no one you know. Or maybe the devil sat next to you, who has his mask so stuck on his face that you can't really tell who he is.

"You're gonna be free with me" he mutters as sincere as his will to help you but using this fucked up way of going about it.

. . .

Taglist: @gojosatoruhere @ane102

Masterlist

[poemnic-tarot]

Light & Shadow. What part of yourself you cannot see?

1 -2

3-4

🧡 ⭐️ ☀️ 🖤 🦋 🧡 ⭐️ ☀️ 🖤 🦋 🧡

(Disclaimer : This is a general reading please only take what resonate. For entertainment purposes only)

Pile 1🪲

Light: Buffalo, Son of Pentacle. “I haven't met all of me yet"

"It was never a question of biology of nature or nurture. I know now that we healed up through being loved and through loving others"

Light side that you don't see about yourself Pile 1, is that you are a slow and steady win the race kind of person. This trait is very admirable because whereas a lot of people would have get impatient and give up. You slow and steadily and patiently work toward what you want. Your trust in yourself and where you can go is unmatched. Your faith in your abilities, skills and the Divine is quite rare and extremely admirable.

You know deep within your heart that in order to grow a flower you must tend to it consistently, diligently and with love and care. We grow more beautiful where we are loved. You know that in order to be successful in your ventures (whether it's career, hobbies or relationships) it does need hard work, consistently and most importantly, faith in your own ability to make it work. And you have it, you have this faith in yourself that you might not realised.

You are also a very loyal person whether to people you considered your people or even to a particular place, or brand. You are a person who does not give up easily (especially in relationship). When someone need a reassurance or help solving a problem, they would definitely come to you Pile 1, because whether you know it or not a lot of people think of you first when they come across an impossible challenge. They would go "oh Pile 1 can definitely do it". This is not in a "I'm going to used Pile 1 to solve my problem for me" kind of way, but in a more, admirable for your skill, talent and your ability to overcome any impossible challenges. However, there is no obligation for you to help someone if you do not want to. But this is what your light side want to say to you that you have not been noticing.

"We are hard to kill, hard to defeat, our faith in the heaven and ourselves is unrivalled. We alway get what we want eventually and people trust us completely and they are right to because any challenges coming our way will be inevitably defeated. So trust in our ability to walk through mud and dark forest."

"I trust myself to go through hell because I trust myself to get out"

The word to describe your light side is Persistent. Which means it will never die. And that’s really scary to be honest. Persistently shining no matter what come at it.

Poems : Revaluation by @cant-find-my-name

There’s alway going to be a losing battle

It’s an inevitable encounter

But that doesn’t mean you should

Lose hope,

Failure doesn’t alway mean the end

As long as you’re breathing

You can still follow

The string of rope

That has alway been tied to you

And your fated destination…..

Song: The Rumbling by SiM

Shadow : Fire ant, 7 of swords. “This moment will just be another story someday"

Where there's light, there will alway be a shadow. One cannot exist without the other. Pile 1, your shadow side that you cannot see is that you tend to not be as discerning as you could have been about what you're getting into or committed to. You are a very committed person, hard to give up when you're decided to do something, but that also means, you can get stuck on a situation or promises that you can't fulfil. Or can fulfil but at your own expense and that can indicate a poor discernment on whether what you are committing to is worth it or not. Whether what you're committing to is a person, a job, or even a hobbies, a brand etc, bring you nothing but drama, headaches, negativity, gossips, overall not good energy.You might have to ask yourself, 'why do I feel like I need to be loyal to these kind of people, places, brands, etc?'. When all you get in return is anything but peace.

Your shadow self urges you to be very discern on who you share your secret or even your goals with because they might not have the best intention. Even if you think there's no harm in sharing them, or because you're very passionate and excited to share your ideas.Your shadow urges you to protect them for a while, unless, rumours will spreads and your name will be at the centre. Not in a good way. Your shadow have a tendency to overshare and spreads informations that you, yourself are still unsure about. You might think it's fine, no big deal but your words are quite powerful and people tend to listen to you and take your words seriously, so please be extra careful on what you are saying about other people and about yourself. Because weirdly, people tend to remember what you said to them or about them distinctly.

Poem: You wish by @cant-find-my-name

…….. You hated my wings

You aimed and try

To shoot it down

Too many times

But miss and then

It hit

And we both were surprised

To find a phoenix

Rising from ashes

Once again, the dead did not collect

However much

You Wish

Songs : Running Up That Hill by Kate Bush

Book : Focus by Daniel Goldman

🧡 ⭐️ ☀️ 🖤 🦋 🧡 ⭐️ ☀️ 🖤 🦋 🧡

Pile 2🌻

Light : Dragon, 4 of Pentacles. “And when tomorrow comes, you'll call it today. Time remains an illusory play."

Pile 2, What you did not see about your light side is that, you are quite a powerful person, specifically a powerful manifestor. I get a feeling that there's nothing you cannot manifest. As well as, you are extremely intuitive, even psychic. You can sense and see illusions, and things ordinary person would not be able to even comprehend. You have quite a skill and a good grasp of concept of realms and dimensions, and you are not even just powerful here in the 3D, but it seems you are quite active in many places/realms/realities/dimensions. Your light is strong, wide spreads. You see all, no lies or illusion can go passed you. It would be hard to fool or scam you Pile 2.

Your light side that you cannot see, yet, is that it can create something from nothing. Entrepreneurial vibes, build something up from the ground, from your own will power alone. And you have scarily good instinct Pile 2. Your success, in the materials world come from your own ideas and intuition. Never underestimate what you feel, even without proof, because almost, alway, you were right. It would be hard to play or even attack you Pile 2, not even just in the 3D, but also you are extremely aware in all realms/realities/dream realms, etc. One word to describe your light side is "Omnipotent",see all. Trust what you see or feels because that's your light speaking to you.

You also have extremely good self-control. It's hard to budge you from your goal, on what you decided to go for. Example, when you say you're not going to drink for a month, you won't. No amount of temptation or cajoling would break you down. Even when you attended a party full of alcohol. You still did not lose self control. This is one of the light side that you might not realised is within you Pile 2. Your light side is very protected of you, whether you know it or not, nothing can get pass you.

Poem : Hidden strength by @cant-find-my-name

My heart is brave but my mind is not

How can I make my intrusive thoughts

Stop.

Red flag, red light, demonise

Why do I think that everyone is a devil in disguise

Why can’t I believe in goodness

Kind heart, My angels, my spirit guides

I need more trust in me

I don’t want to be stuck

With my shadow for what seem like Eternity,

Kindness, kind heart, innocent,

That was all I am

Why can’t I see that I’m strong?

Strong enough to banish what doesn’t

Belong.

Song: Rainbow by Kacey Musgraves

Shadow side : Horse, 2 of Swords, “To tell the different between the absence of treatment opposed to the evidence of mistreatment"

"You don't notice your progress in life because you are alway raising the bar"

Pile 2, a shadow side that you did not see is that you tend to be extremely hard on yourself. Expect yourself to alway be doing something, anything. Achieving things, finishing one goal and what's next?. Alway planning the next steps ahead without taking the time to reflect and truly think on why you need to fulfil that particular goal so bad. This shadow trait love to watch you go way past your limit. Push yourself over the edge for something that doesn't fulfil you truly. Maybe reevaluate your priory, examine your list/tasks that you deemed important and see if self-care, relaxation is on that list. Because it is important for you to be doing nothing, to have fun doing absolutely nothing. It would be quite dangerous for you to be so concentrated on the material world, because it is a black hole where when one has fallen down, it's nearly impossible to come back up. Your shadow trait want you to questioned and reflect on, what do you consider to be 'true wealth'?.

Pile 2, sometimes you go too far, do almost anything to achieve your goals and watch out for that. When you found yourself compromising your integrity and personal values to get what you want. Then it's really time to reevaluate your priority.

Poem: Plateau Fever by @cant-find-my-name

Can you promise me something?

Let me be happy, give me my peace

As I learned my lesson

Nothing was taken

But nothing was given either

And I’m here flowing

Stuck in this Plateau Fever

Never dream of betterness

Thought it was impossible

A star too far to grab

Now my mindset is shifting

Now I believe in the better

I know goodness

They do last

Song : My Little Love by Adele

Book : Circe by Madeline Miller

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Pile 3🪁

Light : Lamb, Son of Pentacles. "And there will be nights when your life will fall apart and no one will notice the morning you spent putting it back together"

(Quite similar to Pile 1, might want to check it out)

Pile 3, Light side of yourself you cannot see is that you are a very honest person. Trust worthy and have a strong integrity. People can/ tend to trust you with their delicate secret, such as, their credit card number, affairs etc. That is how trust worthy you are. You are also a grounded person, lots of earth energy. People feel safe and protected around you pile 3, like you have their back and are extremely reliable, especially in an emergency. They know to trust you to tell them the truth, tell them like how it is, even if it's not pleasant to do so. "Truth is a gift", and your light side is like a gift to the people. Precious, special, delicate but not fragile.

You are also very determined and patient. Slow and steady win the race kind of person. You are a type to bring support, lift people up and contribute in a big way into people lives, not adding drama, troubles or headaches. Life is easier for people, with you in their life Pile 3. You are very patient and consistent in every area of your life, work, friendship, hobbies, etc. People know what to expect from you and that is a good thing because this light trait of yours make people feel a sense of stability, predictability, and reliability. You have this consistency in your character which make people trust quite easily. "I know pile 3 will come prepare, or Pile 3 will alway have my back."

Your light side or maybe physical vessel might seem delicate but people would be shocked with how much you can endured or how much you had gone through pile 3.People would never guess that you had such a hard time because you come across as someone who have everything in order and there is nothing that is wrong in your life. But that just how you come across, even in your energy, but that is not necessary the truth. The truth is Pile 3, you went to shit, hell and back and able to make it look easy and effortless. Just another day in the office. But if people were to be in your position they would be shocked in how much you have to carried on your shoulders (traumas wise), and surprised by how light you still are, despite what you went through?. It's a mystery to the people and a testament to your strength.

Your light side is strong Pile 3, but in a way that's unexpected. You are strong in your honesty, vulnerability, your conviction and your ability to stand your ground. Your light side can get you through any bad situations and come out on top, come out still you, every time.(Pure) Because whereas most people would give up, you continue to step forward, step by step, consistently, no matter the weathers. That is why people trust you so much because they know you will alway show up no matter what, for them, for yourself, for justice.

Poem : The Truth Doesn’t Sell by @cant-find-my-name

No sooner or later

You’d notice an elephant in the

Living room

The clouds obscuring the

Moon

Plants growing between concrete

Your silence spreads

Like deadly diseases……

(See full poem at @cant-find-my-name )

Song: Back to You by Flower Face

Shadow: High Priestess/Octopus. "When you love what you have, you have everything"

Pile 3

You got a major arcana (High Priestess) as your shadow self. This means that you got a major part of your self hidden in the shadow that you haven't been brought to light, yet. This side of you have an extremely strong intuition but you tend to ignore it. This side of you seem to questioned the intangible, the magic, the sprit side of thing. The things that cannot be proven, which means it's not real right?. Sometime the truth is in the feeling Pile 3,no need to touch it, cause you can't touch emotions but emotions are very real even though it's not tangible. This shadow side find it hard to trust in the unknown. You can trust hard work, day to day, the result from it, but a miracle that strike like lightning and made no sense and come from no where?, No way!. This shadow side of yours find it hard to have faith in the Divine. It is so attached and stuck in the 3D. Maybe too focused on what you can see, and ignore the sighs from your very strong, very real intuition, where you have to closed your eyes to see. Not everything that you think you need is in the 3D will bring that sense of security you are alway chasing.This shadow trait of yours, Pile 3, would have you work extra hard, extra diligent to get that promotion, that car, that house because you think you need it in order to feel secure and safe in this world. But true security comes from within, it come from connection within ourselves first and foremost and the connection between you and the source/Divine.That is the true security where it will truly make you feel safe in this world, the ability to trust one’s own intuition and something bigger than us.

Whenever you feel the need to chase that achievement in order to feel secure, sit still and connect with your own intuition because it would tell you to stop looking externally. It would tell you that you are enough as you are. You are the person you can love 100%.Your shadow self want you to trust in something bigger than yourself more.

Poem: Guiding light by @cant-find-my-name

Walk with me

Take my hand

I’ll guide you to where I am

Passing hidden memories

The illusion that drown out the

Objectivity.

I’ll replace it back to you

And show you the Objective truth….

(See full poem at @cant-find-my-name )

Song : Two by sleeping at last

Book : Wisdom of insecurity by Alan Watts

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Pile 4🥨

Light: Crocodile/Ace of Pentacles."People liked to focus on the things they couldn't have"

Pile 4, your light side is very patient, wise and observant. You have great inner discernment and wisdom to know what actually really matter. What is truly important. You know where to focus on to achieve your goals or to even be in a fulfilment/peaceful state in life. You know what to focus on in your life, which is the positive side of life. You take your time before you rush into things. Impulsiveness is not in your vocabulary. You need to observe and gather important information in order to make your move on anywhere or anything, whether that is a project, relationships. You might be good in investment, or a start up because you have the characteristic for it. Example, where people would focus on the profit, fame, status of entrepreneurialship. However, your light side know what to focus on, which is what is truly most important in life, the service, how can your business serve your community. How can we be of service to this earth, the humanity?.These are the big question your light side have an eyes for. You can see the whole picture, while most people only focused on themselves and what they can gain. Pile 4, you would make a stable, consistent leader. It's hard for you to succumb to instant gratification, you would be surprise how much you can hold back more than average on instant gratification,when you know the wait is worth it.Example, you won't buy a cheap furniture right now and saved and invested in a good quality ones where it will last you longer. Your ability to wait to strike when the timing is right is a strength you might not notice about your self because it just comes naturally to you, and Pile 4, when you strike at something, you never miss.

Poem: Kindness win by @cant-find-my-name

How kind of you to smile when you rather

Not

How kind of you to say ‘sorry’ first

How kind of you to notice unhappiness

In someone

How kind of you to hold the door

Open,

Every little gestures count

The impact life changing sometime

And you may never notice

How kind you are or the choices you made

Were kind……..

Song : come back home by BTS

Shadow: Horse/Justice."What suffering is behind your anger?"

Pile 4, your shadow side that you might not see is that you have more choices than you think. There might have been a limited mindset or limited viewpoint that you have.You might be unconsciously believed that your choice is limited. Your shadow side believes, that true freedom doesn't really exist. There has to be sacrifice, alway. There is no such things as true freedom. This side of yours feel limited, caged in, like you have to choose this or that and one is right and one is wrong, so you better choose the right one. Pile 4, the world is not black or white. There are truly no right or wrong choice for you to make, just one where it would benefit you or benefit others. Some choice might be right and seems wrong and vice versa, and some choices can be both. It's not neither or, it either and. I think this side of your feel that it has been making choices/ choosing a path that might have been benefiting others more than yourself, to the point of imbalance. Where it cannot helped but feel resentment towards others even though it was your own choice to do so. Example, I want to go for that promotion but since this co-worker of mine also want to, I choose not to and give it to them instead because they need it more?, something like that. And this side of yours that really want to go for that promotion wondered why can't we strive for it?, for our goals?, for ourselves.

Why do we have to make a choice benefiting others but not us?, what about us?. Why we need to hold back our momentum because of others?. Your shadow want you to run free, especially with your choices, express your wants and needs more. Want to dye your hair red?, go for it, no need to think if that person will approve of it or not. It is not their decision to make but yours. Go for what you aim for without the need to see if everyone is okay with it or not. You will find your buried anger/resentment will be abated after you acknowledge this shadow trait of yours, notice when you tend to hold back even to your own detriment, example, not confessing your feeling for A because you know B likes A, so you would give your way to B. Say it for yourself, do it for you. And F other people for once.

Poem: Show me by @cant-find-my-name

Surely, I must be sick

On the verge of death

The longing so deep

So agonising

Yearning for a miracle to exist

Or else, all my ability to feel

Will simply perish

I’ve lived on this earth

For far too long

To not be falling in love

Or be loved in return……

Song : Signs of the time by Harry Styles

Book : Atomic Habits by James Clear

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Thank you so much for reading!. If this resonate please leave a tip if you like. See you soon!

Check out @cant-find-my-name for more of my original poetry

[things-stronger-than-fear]

the difference between coryo/snowbaird and anakin/anidala is choice vs inevitability. (and also good writing, if we're being honest.)

yes, they're both tragic romances where the man ends up Losing It and trying to kill the woman (trying might be a strong word, he gets awful concerned about her after) after drinking too much Fascism Juice, and yes, the man made those bad decisions himself in both cases, nudged along by childhood trauma and asshole fascist mentors. but the star wars prequels are presented as a tragedy of inevitability; the hunger games prequels are presented as a tragedy of choice.

behold:

+ snowbaird meets because highbottom forces coryo into it and the lipps force lucy gray into it; very much the product of human choices.

- anidala meets because padme emergency lands on tatooine and anakin happens to be able to help (and happens to have a high m count etc etc etc); very much a matter of fate.

+ "it's written in the stars" for snowbaird is in the context of "we saved each other"; it's their own choices that intertwined their fates.

- "nothing can be done to change it" is what's written about anakin's fall. plus quotes like "all things die. eventually, even stars burn out" and "the dark is generous, and it is patient, and it always wins"?????

+ the tragic sticking point for snowbaird is the sejanus betrayal; it's coryo who made the shitty decision to snitch and then lie to lucy gray.

- for anidala, it's the pregnancy; a product of their decision to bang, yes, and welcomed on padme's and, but clearly not planned.

+ coryo goes nuts because of pretty baseless paranoia.

- anakin loses it over possibly prophetic nightmares.

+ lucy gray makes the choice to leave.

- padme is taken by mystical elements ("heartbreak" is not a scientific expectation gdi).

+ coryo's fall was irreplaceable to the tragedy; another person couldn't have replaced him in making the hunger games what they are (see: they were failing under gaul's watch and we get scenes specifically showing that coryo's peers wouldn't have come up with the same ideas -- arachne didn't understand, clemmie didn't help with the paper, sej never would've contributed). one might argue that snowbaird itself was irreplaceable to the tragedy (would the same changes have been made if coryo's tribute wasn't a charming performer lacking in brute strength? likely not). every choice mattered to the history of panem.

- anakin was ultimately replacement -- we was the chosen one, yes (another element of inevitability), but anyone else could've done the same job as vader, especially since obi left him disabled, nullifying anakin's advantages of being the chosen one. (maul, dooku, grievous, ventress -- they were all just as competent as assassins, really.) the fall of the republic was inevitable. nothing anidala did could change that. (yes, it's all palpatine's choices, but he's presented as an inevitable force of the universe.)

+ coryo is born to a legacy, and he's judged by the sins of his father, but he's just a human.

- anakin is The Chosen One. no one blames him for the sins of his father, because he literally does not have one??? so they judge him on that instead.

anyways i am tired the point is they are two different types of tragedy and comparing them is FASCINATING.

[mediocre-daydreams]

𝐟𝐢𝐯𝐞. 𝐚𝐬 𝐢𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐰𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐚 𝐦𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠

remus lupin x animagus!reader

𝚜𝚎𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚜 𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝: 𝚠𝚑𝚎𝚛𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚜𝚝𝚛𝚊𝚢, 𝚒 𝚏𝚘𝚕𝚕𝚘𝚠

summary: remus craves your touch and he knows you’d do anything for him, which is why he refuses to be with you. your affection spark nasty rumors from the slytherins.

notes: angst, fluff, a few slut shaming comments (will be expanded upon in later chapters), tw//the slug club :/

w/c: 5.7k

ﾟ⋆☾*･ﾟ.・。.*゜✭・･ﾟ✫・⋆。.

as if you were a mythical thing, like you were a trophy or a champion ring; if there was one prize, i'd cheat to win.

you and the girls had nice, established saturday mornings. dorcas, the natural early bird, woke up at seven without fail. lily, the overachiever, followed at seven thirty. mary began to stir around eight, and lily and dorcas would shake you and marlene awake no later than eight thirty.

you’d get ready together—you and marlene were always sluggish and slow in the mornings—and head down for breakfast around nine twenty. you always had a coffee, marlene and dorcas shared a pot of chamomile, lily liked earl grey, and mary liked experimenting with flavors. (she was currently enjoying matcha.)

marlene and dorcas would most likely sneak off somewhere, leaving you, lily, and mary to entertain yourselves. if the day was nice, you’d kill a few hours by the black lake. if the weather was poor, you’d get a head start on homework or wander the common room. you liked your saturday routine.

today was very different.

“mr. lupin is not taking visitors at this time, thank you very much,” madam promfrey quipped, sounding not at all apologetic. “please return at…” she checked her wristwatch. “this evening. preferably tomorrow afternoon.”

james batted his eyelashes. “c’mon, madam pomfrey. we’re regulars! you can’t make an exception for your favorite patients?”

madam pomfrey narrowed her eyes at him. “yes, because treating reckless quidditch players after every match is my favorite passtime.” she sighed, turning her head to hide how her lips quirked upwards. “fine, you may have ten- twenty minutes. but i’m being very generous, and reserve the right to kick you out at any time. alright?”

you and the marauders nodded enthusiastically. madam pomfrey waved you over to a curtain-covered bed, where remus’ hoarse grumbles could be heard.

“lukewarm water… can’t even read… so behind on potions… complete fool…”

“moony!” peter exclaimed, whipping away the curtain and jumping into a starfish-like position in front of remus, who jumped.

“pe- wormtail?” he stammered. “prongs? padfoot? hopper?”

“gee, don’t look so happy to see us. you might overexert yourself,” you teased, taking a seat at the edge of the bed. you took his hand, which was cold and beginning to crack from dryness. you frowned, glancing over at madam pomfrey, who looked busy shuffling through loose parchment.

“how are you?” james whispered. “after… y’know.”

remus snorted. “y’don’t have to whisper. pomfrey knows.”

“ah, forgot about that.” james scratched his jaw. “my question still stands, though. how y’feeling?”

“as well as one can feel after breaking most of their bones and transforming into a class five monster, i suppose.” remus licked his chapped lips. his undereyes were dark—an unusual sight—and his voice raspy from all the howling he’d done last night. he didn’t seem tired in the sleepy way; rather, worn down. “i’m just sick of this stupid bed. i’m fine. i’ve done this my whole life. i hate being here while everyone treats me like porcelain; like they pity me. and it’s boring.”

sirius furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. “i don’t pity you, moony. in fact, i take great pleasure in kicking you when you’re already down. for example,” sirius cleared his throat dramatically, “let’s discuss last night, shall we?”

you glanced around the room. “muffliato,” you murmured. “yeah, we were right. i wouldn’t trust sirius with any secrets.”

sirius glared at you and returned to his story. “apparently, my kisses are not appreciated by a certain rabbit, but snot is fine? i see how it is.”

you looked at your feet. remus became defensive. “i do not have snot!”

james looked at sirius knowingly. “yes, you do. it was dripping out of your nose, mate. you fell asleep and i swear, there was a puddle of wet stuff underneath you. horrid, i tell you.” james pretended to shiver.

remus quickly changed the subject. “how’d you all leave in time?”

“peter,” you all chorused. you tilted your head towards the bashful boy. “again, peter’s the most responsible one when you’re not here. he bit us until we woke up and we snuck out before sunrise. you were already asleep then.”

“wait, so did you four get any sleep last night?”

james pursed his lips. “hopper did… and- and sirius power-napped?”

remus looked at you all disappointedly. peter jumped in. “in my defense, i was a rat surrounded by giants! excluding you, hopper. it’s not exactly easy to fall asleep knowing you could be accidentally trampled and killed!”

you pointed at peter in agreement. “see? see? nobody’s scared of you, moony. we’re scared of james’ nonexistent coordination.”

remus cracked a smile.

james was offended. “excuse me? you’re talking to the best chaser in gryffindor history, here! i’ve got a bloody plaque and everything!”

as peter and sirius laughed, you turned to remus and the two of you exchanged a quiet moment. “how are you, really?” you mouthed.

“‘m alright, i promise,” remus’ lips twitched before falling into a frown. he winced. it seemed as if the corners of his mouth were beginning to bleed.

you gasped. “merlin, you’re bleeding! let me get some salve or something, stay right there.”

remus chuckled. “i’m not going anywhere, don’t worry.”

you hurried over to madam pomfrey, practically sliding on the tiled floor in your frenzy. “madam pomfrey, do you have any salve? remus’ hands are all cracked and his lips are beginning to bleed,” you huffed.

madam pomfrey blinked at you and remained silent for a second, before shaking her head clear and digging through a messy medicine cabinet. she held up a small jar labelled “BALM” and placed it in your hand. “it’s my own recipe. very effective.”

you thanked her graciously, and as you rushed back to remus, you could feel her eyes on your back, almost like she was judging you.

“rem, you’re bleeding! did you not notice?” you gushed, unscrewing the “balm” and sticking two fingers into it, scoping out a generous amount of the thick paste and grabbing remus’ hand.

remus’ chest shook with laughter as he watched you fret over him with more care than he’d give to himself. you kneeled down beside him, laying his hand on top of his leg gently, so you could rub the salve into his broken skin.

“rem, i’m serious. why don’t-”

“no, i’m sirius,” sirius interjected, laughing at his own wit. peter chuckled weakly. james didn’t speak, too busy watching you and remus interact.

“-why don’t you take care of yourself more? look, your skin is all dry and cracked. do you have eczema?”

“what’s eczema?” james’ head perked up. “is it a disease? is it contagious?”

peter sighed. “no, it’s a skin condition. it’s when you have dry patches or rashes and no, james, it’s not contagious.”

james sighed in relief.

you and remus were still in your quiet bubble. “i dunno, hopper,” remus mumbled, his eyes fixed on your careful fingers as they moved across the palms of his hands in small swirls, like young, sprightly dancers across an old theater’s well-worn stage. “all the little stuff was kinda forgotten after… y’know. i got bitten. eczema was the least of my worries.” remus laughed dryly, coughing slightly from the effort.

“have you had water? remus, you’ve got to take better care of yourself,” you chided. there was a glass of water on the table beside him, and you adjusted the straw so remus could drink while lying down. remus waved your hand away, pushing himself up into a seated position, much to your disapproval. he looked you firmly in the eye as he took the straw out of the cup, and made a big show of drinking normally.

you bit back a smile at his stubbornness. remus smiled too, the corners of his mouth stretching and pulling too tightly. you placed your hands on remus’ cheeks, willing them into a loose position. going back for more balm, you rubbed your fingers together so the heat of your hands would melt the paste into something thin enough to spread.

“i- i’m going to touch your lips now, if that’s okay,” you breathed, suddenly hyperaware of your compromised position. you were eye level with his chest. “is this alright?” you murmured, sitting yourself on the edge of his bed once more and turning your torso in line with his. you were now eye level, so you could reach the skin on his face more easily.

“yeah, i- it’s okay,” remus dipped his head in affirmation, swallowing thickly. you watched, mesmerized, as his adam’s apple bobbed, and you had to tear your gaze away in favor of the salve on your hand.

“okay, just- um, sit still, please.” your finger was wobbly as it inched closer to remus’ face, and you prayed he wouldn’t notice. you found yourself leaning closer, your free hand coming up to cup his jaw; you felt the growing stubble scratch your palm. oh, how torturous it was to be so close to him, to run your fingers over the lips you’d desperately craved for three years, only to stop yourself from kissing him. he was hurt, and all you could think about was your unrealistic indulgences. you knew remus would never be so selfish.

remus had closed his eyes. you felt like you were taking advantage of him, in some way, by slowing down the movement of your fingers so you could take a couple more seconds to memorize his face. the cluster of freckles under his eyes, the little bump on his nose, the curve of his eyebrows that seemed to twitch with each of your touches, the scars across his cheek that you longed to touch and worship and love…

“okay! okay, i’m all done!” you blurted. you’d recoiled as soon as you found your thoughts drifting into dangerous territory. you smiled awkwardly at him. “sorry about that.” your face scrunched.

remus’ eyes seemed to bore into yours, like he knew what you were thinking. wordlessly, he smoothed out the anxious wrinkles on your face, a content calmness washing over his face as soon as he saw you untense. you prayed that he couldn’t feel your face burning up.

“you could give madam pomfrey a run for her money.” sirius broke the silence, making both you and remus jump.

peter glanced over his shoulder and found madam ponfrey deeply invested in her work. “it’s definitely been more than 20 minutes. y’reckon we should just stay until she kicks us out?”

“duh.” james rolled his eyes. “that way, evans won’t force me to do my homework.”

--

remus looked much better by monday. you would occasionally glance over at him, but only because you were worried about his dry skin. you’d convinced madam pomfrey to let you take the rest of the balm, and now you would force remus to apply it at least three times a day. he didn’t object, much to your surprise.

“can you drop it?” reamus threw an arm over his eyes as peter and james prattled on about the importance of stretching and peter’s father’s muggle pilates class that had done wonders for his flexibility. after seeing remus bedridden from a transformation, their concern and caring nature only multiplied.

“okay, but get this. muggles go to this person called a chiropractor, and they pay the chiropracter to break their bones!” james’ eyes were wide with wonder.

“no, james. they crack their bones,” peter corrected.

“i know! that’s wild, right? i think it could be good for you.” james patted remus on the shoulder. “if not, you should look into cupping therapy. it’s an asian practice; it’s worked for centuries! oh! oh! or, you could-”

remus groaned. “seriously, i’m fine. thanks, though.”

you sat on his bed beside him; the two of you preferred watching peter and james’ antics from a distance. you moved closer to remus, the mattress shifting under your weight.

“hey, i know you’re kind of sick of us worrying about you, but will you at least let me do the balm for you? it’s just that i-”

“yes, yes, please do.” remus interrupted. his eyes widened as if he hadn’t meant to say anything. “i mean, yes, that’s okay. i’m okay with that.”

you tried to hide your giddiness as you pulled the balm from the pocket of your robes (you’d taken to carrying it around wherever you went) and followed the routine you and remus had fallen into. he’d hold out his hand, you’d take it and apply the balm, and he’d squeeze your hand and you’d probably look up at him, all flustered, and he’d probably look down at you, all flustered, and you’d probably stay there for a moment before letting go of each others’ hands, all flustered.

you hated how much of an effect he had on you. you prided yourself on being collected and consistent and confident, but he seemed to shatter every one of your walls with just one look. and you hated yourself for never being able to stick around whenever he saw past one of your acts. when he’d ask you what was wrong, or if you were okay, or if you needed to talk, you’d always plaster this stupid smile on and brush him off.

but sometimes you weren’t okay. sometimes, your mind raced with thoughts of the war, and concerns about remus’ lycanthropy, and what would happen to him as not only a half-blood but a werewolf, and what would happen to you as a muggle born, and what would happen to the two of you if you ended up tog-

you didn’t want to burden remus with such things, so you didn’t. you didn’t want to burden anyone with such trivial worries, so you didn’t. that was something you liked about yourself: you cared about your friends enough to make sure they didn’t have to fall into your pits of distress because you never tied them down with anchors. you made sure that they could sail freely.

so there went the routine. you dropped remus’ hand and busied yourself with screwing the cap back on, and you could feel remus’ eyes on the crown of your head as you ducked down and tried to avoid his gaze.

“what’re you two up to now?” sirius leaned on the doorframe, taking in the scene before him. 

“you’re back!” you jumped from remus’ bed and ran towards sirius, enveloping him into a big hug. sirius laughed, reciprocating. he lifted you from the ground and swayed you back and forth enthusiastically, much to your glee.

“i’m back!” he boomed. “good godric, i think i’d rather kiss my mother than take another detention with binns.”

“you’re back,” remus grumbled, suddenly sullen. peter and sirius exchanged the same knowing look that they had been for weeks now.

peter waggled his eyebrows at sirius, and james, for once, caught on. james stifled a laugh. “i never noticed, but you and padfoot look really good together,” he commented nonchalantly.

“yeah?” sirius raised a brow. “d’you think so, dove?” he lowered you to the ground and looked down at you questioningly.

“erm, what?” you smiled thinly. “like, as a couple?”

“yeah,” peter agreed, “i could totally see it. you’re both… uh…” peter struggled to find traits that the two of you had in common. you and sirius more so balanced each other out rather than complimented each other.

“you’re both beautiful!” janes shouted. “suuuper handsome. real lookers, you two.”

remus turned away from james and peter’s terrible matchmaking and settled for shuffling his feet back and forth on the floor. he tried not to tap; you always knew something was up when he tapped. he wasn’t in the mood to be interrogated.

“thanks, james.” you squinted. “are you guys okay? you’re being really weird.”

“all good!” james fumbled. “i just got excited about… the two of you, s’all.”

“oh, i know! you’re both really stubborn,” peter blurted.

you looked at sirius, confused. sirius shrugged.

“alright, you’ve officially lost it. sirius and i?” you wrinkled your nose at him.

sirius laughed in agreement. “we’d never work. i’m too ravishingly gorgeous and effortlessly charismatic for hopper. she’d blind herself trying to admire my radiance, and we don’t want that, do we?”

“for your information, sirius, i’m way out of your league. resort to your flowery language if you must, but i don’t need to prove my worth. it speaks for itself,” you humphed, sticking your chin up theatrically. 

remus grinned, hiding it under his tilted face.

“alright, i’m officially done here. goodbye, marauders!” you called from over your shoulder as you scurried down the spiral staircase.

“goodbye marauder, singular!” james shouted after you.

peter looked at remus smugly. “y’good, moony? or is your skin acting up? should we apply some more balm for you?”

“yeah, y’look a little off, mate. s’everything alright?” james pitched in.

“i’m fine,” remus snapped. 

“are you sure? you seem… upset,” sirius probed, inching closer.

“i’m not upset!” remus insisted. “i’m completely fine, see?” he lifted his head up and it was comically obvious that he was upset. his eyebrows were pinched and his cheeks slightly flushed.

“okay, okay! you’re not upset. would you say that you’re… jealous?” sirius grinned.

“i don’t know what you mean.”

“oh c’mon,” james whined, throwing himself backwards onto remus’ bed. “we all know you like her.”

“i- i don’t know who you’re talking about,” remus stammered.

peter clicked his tongue. “has anyone told you you’re a shit liar, moony?”

“oh, sod off, would’ya?”

“moony’s jealous! moony’s jealous!” james and sirius cheered, watching as remus’ ears began to turn red. “oooo, you so like her,” james teased.

“i do not!”

sirius shook his finger at remus. “aha! so there is a her!”

“no! i mean, i just-”

“mate, she obviously likes you back. she’s confessed her love to you at least twice now. i dunno what you’re doing, but whatever it is, stop.” peter crossed his arms, disappointed at his friend.

remus tilted his head back and stared at the ceiling. “it doesn’t matter if she likes me back, i don’t want to be with her.”

“why?” james yelled, absolutely horrified.

“that makes no sense!” sirius gasped, baffled.

“you dimwit!” peter scoffed.

“because she’s… she’s her, and i’m me!” remus snarled, whipping his head around to face his three meddlesome friends. “don’t you understand? i’m- i’m going to spend the rest of my life trapped by this damn condition and she’s been through one transformation with me and- and do you see how much she’s been struggling? she’s not been sleeping or eating properly; she’s constantly chasing me and she won’t let me bloody help her. i just know she’d spend the rest of her life trying to fix me but i can’t be fixed and i won’t let her waste her life tied down by someone like me!”

the marauders were silent.

“what do you mean, ‘someone like you?’” sirius croaked.

remus exhaled shakily. “a monster, sirius. she deserves so much more than a monster.”

--

monday potions with the slytherins was surprisingly your favorite class. you were good at potions, and as long as you sat near the front, you wouldn’t have to deal with the nastier specimens. today was no exception. you and lily—the two of you were almost always partners—were all the way up front, and early as well.

there were still a few minutes until class started and slughorn had not yet arrived. you and lily were sifting through your satchels for quills and parchment while you chatted.

“so where were you last saturday?” lily smoothed out her parchment with concentration.

“uh, mo- remus had a cold, so i went to check on him,” you lied smoothly.

“oh, remus had a cold, now did he?” lily didn’t look at you, but you could hear the teasing in her voice.

“yes, remus had a cold. and being the considerate and polite friend that i am, i went to check on him,” you stated plainly.

lily hummed questioningly. “let’s say i believe you—in terms of the friend bit, i mean. why haven’t i seen you all weekend? surely, you haven’t been sleeping over in the hospital wing. and you don’t seem very sick to me.”

“i-” you coughed. “i’ve been… busy.”

it was a flimsy lie, and you both knew it. lily sighed, tutting at your secretive behavior. “alright then, whatever you say. now, i have to fill you in on-”

“look, there’s two of ‘em!” mulciber’s crass voice interrupted you and lily’s peaceful conversation.

you rolled your eyes, resigning yourself to lining up your quill and parchment so they were perfectly parallel.

“the prude and the slut!” somebody laughed, their identity lost underneath the layer of chittering students who began to flood into the classroom.

you looked over at lily, examining her reaction. her eyebrows, thin and straight, twitched noticably. you watched as she pursed her lips momentarily before pulling them into a strained smile. “like i was saying, i’ve got to fill you in on mary’s minstrations at lunch.”

you smiled warmly at her. lily wore her heart on her sleeve unabashedly, and you were always better at hiding your feelings. that’s why people flocked to you for comfort, you assumed.

“hello, lovely ladies!” sirius suavely sat behind you, resting his elbows on the desk and propping his head up. “what a beautiful morning it is, but not quite as beautiful as you two,” he flirted.

you pinched his cheek. “hey, gorgeous,” you purred, looking him up and down. “i could say the same to you.”

remus slid into the seat beside sirius, smiling stiffly at you and raising his hand in greeting.

“oh! hi, remus!” you were caught off guard and your voice was pitched higher than normal. you cleared your throat. “i mean, hi.”

remus looked around nervously. “yeah. hi.”

“GOOD MORNING!” slughorn boomed, somehow even more passionate than usual. there were a few murmurs of “good morning” and other halfhearted greetings, though slughorn wasn’t at all put off by the lack of enthusiasm.

“is it just me, or has he lost it?” you heard james whisper to peter from beside you. 

“has he ever had it?” peter rebuked, making you chuckle under your breath. lily looked over at you questioningly. you waved it off.

“as you all know, your o.w.l.s. are coming up, which is why the rest of our classes this year will be dedicated to content review.”

the class groaned.

“however!” slughorn beamed. “this year’s examinations will focus primarily on brewing and less on history, which means i will be making all essays worth a quarter less.

“instead, we will be focusing on more challenging in-class potions in partners. now, i understand that you’ve all been allowed to choose partners in the past; however, to ensure that your brewing capabilities are not dependent on a certain partner,” slughorn looked at avery and crouch in the back, “i will be randomly assigning different partners for each class.

“today, we will be brewing the wit-sharpening potion—godric knows some of you need it,” slughorn muttered, “and these will be the pairs:

“evans and pettigrew, potter and crouch…” james’ head fell to his hands in defeat.

“longbottom and mckinnon, y/n and snape…”

the four marauders and whipped their heads to you in mortification. lily saw their expressions and rolled her eyes. she patted your arm reassuringly. “aw, sev’s not so bad. he’s great at potions; you’ll be such a fantastic team!”

you smiled painfully at lily, nodding along. “yeah, i bet. thanks, lily.”

“…let’s get moving, folks! the group with the best potion will be exempt from the 3 page essay for homework.”

your eyes widened. you really wanted that exemption.

“severus!” you called out meekly. “hey, it’s good to see you… again.” the last time you’d seen snape was when he’d come looking for lily only to walk in on a conversation which mainly consisted of you airing out your distaste for the boy.

“do not call me severus.”

“a- alright then!” you tried your best to be optimistic. “shall i get the ingredients, or would you like to?”

“i’ll get them,” snape scowled. he dropped his voice to a bitter hiss.“i can’t deal with another incompetant muggle-born messing things up.”

you raised your eyebrows but remained silent. there was a time and place for picking fights, and it would do no good to sacrifice your potions grade over some carbon copy blood supremacist. plus, a bad grade would only fuel the misconception that muggle-borns were less capable.

snape returned, handling the ingredients like they were precious. “you can boil the water.” snape didn’t spare you a glance before beginning to cut up the ginger root. his cuts were slow and measuredd; snape sat back and examined his work smugly. when you glanced over at his handiwork, you scoffed. 

“it doesn’t matter how carefully you cut the ginger,” you sighed in disapproval, “if the pieces aren’t even.” you held up the two slices he’d cut, holding them in the air next to each other. “see, this one has a bump, which probably adds two or three grams. just because they’re the same length doesn’t mean they’re the same volume.”

snape narrowed his eyes at you. “do you really think i would’ve missed that? you’re not better than me. keep your little comments to yourself.”

you glared at him. “sure. why don’t you run and grab a scale, snape, and we’ll inspect your work.”

you were right: snape had cut the ginger pieces unevenly. you didn’t bother rubbing it in, knowing that just being proven wrong was a blow to his ego enough.

snape dropped the trimmed pieces into the cauldron and the two of you admired the nice green that the potion changed to. snape, who liked to remain emotionless, seemed to be surprised. you cheered internally. last class, slughorn had told snape his potion coloration was slightly dull. if it hadn’t been for your advice, this potion would’ve ended up the same way.

“armadillo bile,” you read off from the blackboard. “you can do that, if you want. i’ll prepare the scarab beetles.”

snape agreed, much to your surprise. you could hear snide comments from the back of the room emerge and snape’s willing compliance.

“taking orders from a mudblood, is he?”

“he’s such a humiliation.”

“dear salazar, bella would throw a fit if she was here.”

you paid them no mind. in fact, you found yourself enjoying the slytherins’ belittling of snape. they truly were gryffindor’s opposites; no loyalty to their follow housemates.

grinding the scarab beetles turned out to be an effective stress reliever. you fell into a comfortable rhythm with old mortar and pestle, almost missing the look remus flashed at you.

you caught his eye before he could look away, and remus mouthed, “how’s it going?”

you gave him an exaggerated look of distress in response. he covered his mouth, but you watched as his eyes turned into little crescent moons, indicating his laughter. you bit back a smile.

“quit whoring around with the half-blood,” snape spat. he eyed the powdered beetle shells disdainfully, and snatched the mortar from your hands. “merlin, you’re useless.”

you let snape sprinkle in the powder and from the corner of your eye, watched as he added more armadillo bile. you were reoccupied with watching the back of remus’ head as he bent over his steaming cauldron. remus waved a hand in front of his face to fan the steam from his eyes. his partner, mary, was giggling. their hands brushed as they both reached for more ginger root, and you found yourself tensing up.

“since you’re so particular about it, why don’t you cut up the rest of the ginger?” snape jeered, sliding the knife towards your side of the desk. you barely looked up before you began to cut. you could feel snape’s watchful gaze boring holes into your hands as he searched for any reason to ridicule you, but your hands were steady. you were confident in your potion-making abilities, and it showed.

“here,” you held out four nearly identical slices of ginger root to snape, and he picked them up from your palms delicately as if the slightest touch or brush over your skin would burn him like acid.

the potion turned a pale, buttery yellow. focused, deliberate clockwise spins of snape’s wand began to reveal a pigmented buttercup color. you tapped snape’s shoulder and he recoiled, but allowed you to take over the mixing. a couple more stirs and you were left with a rich ochre potion, which had reached a consistent temperature without much bubbling.

“this is wonderful; truly fantastic work!” slughorn commended, clapping his hands together. “you should be very proud of yourselves.” in your potion-brewing haze, you hadn’t realized that slughorn had already reviewed most of the class’ potions. james and barty crouch sat in front of a cauldron that seemed to be hissing, while frank and marlene high fived each other, satisfied with their average outcome.

“you may be dismissed! the two of you,” slughorn waved at you and snape, “please stay back. and miss evans, i’d like to speak to you as well. you’re not in trouble, don’t worry,” he chortled.

lily hurried to your side, taking your hand and squeezing it reassuringly. she seemed pleased to see snape and smiled at him kindly. snape nodded his head in response, his oily hair falling from where it’d been tucked behind his ear. he pushed it out of his face bashfully.

“as fifth year students, i’d like to invite you to what i call ‘the slug club.’ it’s named after me, see?” slughorn pointed at himself jovially. “i invite the most promising fifth, sixth, and seventh year students, and i’d like you all to attend. the three of you have demonstrated incredible ability in my classroom.

“now, i’m hosting the first slug club event of the year this sunday at eight in the spare room across from my office. it’s an important meeting; you’ll introduce yourselves and get to know each other. dinner will be served as well, so there’s no excuses! i expect to see you all there.” slughorn patted his belly happily and made his way back to his desk, excusing the three of you as he squeezed through the rows of tables.

lily was sprightly as she manuevered easily through the desks. you patted your satchel, making sure you’d packed everything up. snape, who was always in a rush to get out of the classroom, lingered.

you paid him no mind as you buttoned everything up and tightened your straps, slinging your bag over your shoulder. it clanked as it hit corners and sides of tables—fifth year textbooks were much thicker and heavier than the years before.

you could feel snape’s gloomy presence behind you, trailing along like the stubborn smell of smoke. he was going down the same row of tables you were, most likely to bother you. he was so close that you could feel his sticky breath on your neck; he smelled of salty sardines and wilted cabbage. you shuddered.

snape cleared his throat ostentatiously, and before you could move aside like any decent person would do, he shoved past you proudly. his bag, heavy laden with textbooks and other snape-y evil contraptions, hit your hip. the bag bounced off of your body and flapped open—he’d forgotten to fasten it—and out fell a small book. it thudded on the ground, but somehow, snape didn’t seem to notice. you didn’t think much of it; you weren’t inclined to chase him down and return it.

curious, you slipped it into your bag for further investigation.

the marauders were waiting for you outside the classroom. “what was that, thumper?” james slung an arm around your shoulder, leaning his body weight on you until your knees buckled. the two of you wobbled before james grabbed onto remus’ forearm and grounded himself.

“slughorn invited me to ‘the slug club. it’s for promising students,” you sneered mockingly. “please, what’s so promising about me? i’ve got a couple major felonies under my belt that i’ve yet to be prosecuted for?”

sirius laughed. “godric, i love you. where’ve you been all my life?”

“in the library, with remus.” you snuck a glance at the tall, brown haired boy to find him smiling down at you, eyes darting across your face.

“ugh, you two are so infuriating.” peter kicked his satchel, which had been lying on the ground, in annoyance.

“what?”

“why?”

“because,” peter droned, as if it was obvious, “you’re so perfect for each other. the two of you must be the smartest, stupidest blokes i’ve ever met.”

“that’s quite the oxymoron,” remus noted.

“see?” peter pointed. “proves my point!”

“i don’t understand why you haven’t just ki-”

lily saved you from a very awkward conversation. “y/n, babe!” she skipped towards you, elated. “you’re going to slughorn’s event, right? sev promised to be my date, and i think you should find someone too. it’ll be a blast!”

james sputtered. “sev? what the bloody hell is ‘sev?’” 

lily stared at him judgememntally. “…severus? sev, severus?”

sirius’ jaw dropped. “your date is snivellus?”

lily scowled. “how many times have i told you not to call him that? he’s not so bad—babe, tell them! he was nice during potions today, right?”

you stretched your lips into a thin, pained smile. “yeah, he was… civil.” you thought​​ that was a bit too generous.

“see?” lily sighed happily. “i don’t understand why you can’t give him a chance. he’s very nice once you get to know him, i promise.”

you nodded slowly, unconvinced. you looked at remus, who looked at james and sirius, who looked completely outraged.

“evans, please, don’t go with him. hey- hey! you could go with me! mcgonagall told me slughorn invited me too, during transfiguration. ditch snivellus, we’d have a much better time together,” james winked.

lily wrinkled her nose. “you’re rancid, potter.” she turned to you and her expression softened. “bye, y/n. see you later!”

“wait,” james paused, “you don’t have a date, right? will you be my date to slughorn’s… thing? pleaaaase, thumper?”

you grabbed james by the shoulders (which was admittedly a bit difficult, because he was much taller than you) and shook him. “no need to beg, prongs. i’m all yours.”

remus began tapping his foot.

taglist: check “about me” for more taglist info

@im-a-slut-for-fluff @bambamwolf87 @yourallihave @cowboibeepbeep @liszblog @springflwer07 @getawayfrommewerewolf @ilovehotdads69 @soumya-13 @emmaev @urgrandadsashes @girl-ln-green @vilentia @bibli0thecary @khayhuij @summer-noir

[tanoraqui]

Trick or Treat! Something Silmarillion?

In the early Third Age when Turgon has returned to life and he and Elenwë and Finrod & Amarië are finally fulfilling their long-held plan of having children at the same time, that they might grow up close as siblings like Finrod and Turgon had, Idril and Tuor say, "Hey, we could also do that! We always meant to have more than one child, and there's nothing actually stopping us!"

So they do. Now, there actually is something stopping them a little - the bearing of Elvish or half-Elvish children is more...metaphysically participatory? than that of Men (or Dwarves, etc). For both parents. Tuor had done it once and been fine, but that was in his native land, and even with Ulmo's guardianship and life on Tol Eressëa, which was fairly mild in terms of blessing-intensity, at roughly 3,500 years of age, his fëa is now worn a little thin.

But their daughter is born hearty and whole, and if Tuor is abed for a few weeks with weariness, well, he's back on his feet soon, and Idril is more than strong enough to bear a single mother's spiritual burden now that the babe is born. Indeed, she insists. Unequivocally.

Moriwen ("dark-crowned maiden") is named for her grandmother Rian and the dark brown hair she inherited from her (to no small amusement to many, given that her parents were both very blond). Her hair never quite achieves the natural luster of Elvish locks - instead, it easily gets tangled, bedraggled, and encrusted with sea-salt like her father's.

She grows up on Tol Eressëa at a nearly Elvish pace, because that feels most natural to her, and chooses to live and die (or not) as an Elf. All her friends and family are Elves (or as close as one semi-retired prophet of the sea can be) so why should she wish to be otherwise?

(The Choice is natural to all first-generation half-bloods, though after that, majority-genetics determines it unequivocally, and mortality wins in a coincidentally 50/50 balance...unless complicated by Maiaran blood, see: the heirs of Lúthien. That extends the Choice for a couple more generations, though mortality is still a heavy draw. Usually. Several Valar very quietly wish those guys would stop reproducing because tbh it's freaking them out.)

But the Mannish half of her heritage did enrapture her as well, and even more eagerly than Tuor, she sought tales of mortal Arda from every newcomer to the immortal shores. What were her distant cousins up to now? How was their mastery of metallurgy going? Were Elrond's youngest (her great-niece!) walking yet? Was that cathedral in Osgiliath still under construction?

She started recording accounts, new and old, and copying any books people brought with them when they Sailed. She blinked and she'd founded a library, soon the greatest in Aman for records of mortal lands. She was called Moriwen Peradan ("half-Man"), and for at least half of the Third Age had a thriving covert correspondence with Elrond via specially bred seabirds. (If you combine the migratory endurance of the arctic tern with the seagull's ability to get everywhere, and you're very patient, long-lived, determined, and by a precise intersection of Ainu blood and favor have a particular knack with seabirds, you can create an all-new species that can travel back and forth along the Straight Road, and discreetly share them with family!)

Moriwen ends up marrying Maeglin about a century after his re-embodiment, after he awkwardly shyly sidles into the Great Library of Tol Eressëa to find out (without, god forbid, talking to anyone involved) what happened to Idril's descendants after they survived, y'know, Stuff; and some rom-com mistaken identity shenanigans ensue.

[redshoes-blues]

“The dark is generous, and it is patient, and it always wins—but in the heart of its strength lies one weakness: one lone candle is enough to hold it back.

Love is more than a candle.

Love can ignite the stars.”

From: Revenge of the Sith, by Matthew Stover

[bmodiwrites]

(Falling In Love) Losing Control Now

Hi friends! I'm back with a silly little thing that came out of my fingertips like they were possessed. It's one of those situations that I've always wanted to try with my own SO. It'd be so fun! This little baby ended up straying into smut territory, so minors DNI! Hop over to AO3 to catch the story there - it's worth the trip, y'all!

Walking through the door after an excruciatingly long day at work, Eddie expects to find Steve at the stove, cooking his patented Thursday night spaghetti. Instead, he’s met with darkness barely broken up by a singular flickering candle.

With a slight sigh, Eddie gracelessly puts his backpack and jacket on a kitchen chair. He usually is more cognizant of himself but he’s tired and not at all happy with the loneliness that sets in more and more as the seconds pass. Steve’s ire just might be worth the slight change in routine if it means actually getting the man’s attention.

Now that he’s feeling a tiny bit more comfortable, Eddie walks across the kitchen to his only light source. His sight is still good enough to pick up the stark white paper lying on their black marble counters. The candle flickers as he picks up what can only be a note. It takes a second for the light to allow him to read the words, though his impatience has him squinting in an attempt to read the words before him.

Eds –

You’ve been stressed, so let’s have a bit of fun. In the dining room, there’s something waiting for you. Snag what’s there and come find me. Each hit costs the other a piece of clothing.

Happy hunting.

Love,

Steve

Blinking from both shock and excitement, Eddie puts the note back on the counter, careful to keep it away from the open flame. He’s not ashamed to admit that he practically runs to the dining room where his surprise is waiting for him. It’s been a while since he’s felt anticipation like this bubbling up in his chest.

Between the kids at school and the music he’s still trying to produce, Eddie’s tired and filled to the brim with the kind of discontent that comes from having too much on his plate. Despite that, Steve’s thoughtful ideas and interesting ways of caring for him keep Eddie on his toes. Steve, in general, makes Eddie so very happy. Times like this reinforce that truth tenfold.

A soft gasp leaves his lips the moment he notices the Nerf gun sitting on the table. It’s one of the newer toys that’s out on the market – his kids are always going on about the damn things instead of participating in the amazing art activities Eddie meticulously plans. They’re the bane of his existence, yet Eddie is overjoyed to see the toy on the table.

There are already bullets loaded into the front of it, patiently waiting for Eddie to inaccurately fire them off. He sees another bundle next to the gun and pockets them. Despite knowing he’s not going to need many to get Steve successfully out of his clothes, Eddie isn’t one to take any chances.

Strip Nerf War is his new favorite game and Eddie is absolutely going to win.

Picking up the Nerf gun, Eddie is reminded of the many times he’s played laser tag with Dustin and the crew over the years. The pommel of it sits nicely in his hand. Eddie’s finger makes no hesitation as it settles over the plastic trigger. For some reason, relief washes over him. He’s seconds away from having one of the best nights of his life – Eddie can feel that in the very pit of his soul.

As quietly as possible, Eddie makes his way down the hall. Their house is small, despite the both of them working successful jobs. It’s just the two of them without much need for a lot of space. There are two spare bedrooms for their friends to use when they visit, though they’re pretty much empty – and absolutely piss poor for hiding.

Eddie bypasses both of those rooms in favor of tiptoeing into their bedroom. There’s a bedside table light on but no other signs of life. Knowing the calming atmosphere is just a trick to catch him off guard, Eddie arms himself, bringing the Nerf gun a little higher so he’s ready to shoot if need be. His heart races a little, like it always does when Steve is near.

That in and of itself should’ve been enough of a clue for Eddie to turn around and fire at will. Yet, he’s still caught off guard by the soft footfalls that sound behind them. There’s a sharp hit against his back before Eddie can turn and protect himself or get out of the way. He’s been hit and the game is truly on.

“I think I’ll take your socks first,” Steve says as he sidles up against Eddie’s back. His chest is heaving slightly, the beat of his heart tangible where they’re pressed together. It’s glorious in the way losing is not.

Huffing out a petulant laugh, Eddie leans down without trying to fight back. In doing so, his ass butts up against Steve’s crotch, drawing a breath from them both. He takes off his socks, dropping them unceremoniously on the floor.

“I’ll give you a ten second head start before I really start to hunt you down,” Eddie offers as he straightens back up. He doesn’t bother turning around because Steve is gone before all of the words are out of Eddie’s mouth.

It takes a few minutes for Eddie to find Steve again, though this time, he’s prepared to fire right away. The darts fly from the front of the gun, landing three against Steve’s chest easily. Eddie can’t help but let out a whoop of excitement – not only is he winning, but Steve’s flesh will be on display soon enough, too.

“Jeans first, baby. Then your shoes and shirt.” Eddie’s grin is mischievous and gloriously met with a saucy smirk of Steve’s own.

They don’t break eye contact as Steve kicks off his shoes. There’s not a chance in hell Eddie’s going to miss a single moment of Steve’s little strip tease. To get his pants down, Steve has to put his Nerf gun on the floor before him. Instead of going down the easy route, Steve turns around and sticks his ass out as he bends forward to put it on the ground. He’s oh so slow to get up and when he does, it’s with the slightest wiggle of his hips. The tease is glorious and way too much for the little game they’re playing.

Still, Eddie can’t deny that he’s hooked by the slow slip of the metal button on Steve’s jeans. Long fingers work it through the hole. Steve bites his lip as he drops the zipper and pulls the sides of his pants apart. For just a second, he stares at Eddie that way – a little more open and sexy than just a few seconds prior.

When Steve moves next, Eddie breaks out of his fever dream – Steve in real life without a shirt is better than any fantasy or memory his brain can conjure up. Eddie has to stop himself from drooling as inch after glorious inch of bare skin is revealed. At thirty, Steve is hairier and a little thicker than his twenty-year old self. For all that it’s worth, Eddie loves the body slowly being revealed to him more than just about anything else. Steve as a person tops the list, but only just barely.

The distraction is enough for Steve to move like lightening, grabbing his Nerf gun from the floor and shooting Eddie so quickly neither of them really see it coming. Steve is grinning at him with the most triumphant look in his eyes, as though getting caught and cornered was a setup. After a moment of counting the darts before him, Eddie comes to the conclusion that Steve is a mastermind, totally in control of all things happening.

Soon, both of them are down to just their boxers, the ridiculously fun toys still in their hands. Eddie is hiding behind the couch, peeking his head over the edge in hopes of catching Steve doing the same thing. They’re so close to the finish line that Eddie is getting impatient. He wants to grab the bare skin of Steve’s sides and pull the man close. He needs to have that chest hair against him, reminding him of all the comfort and love Steve’s mere presence brings. The familiarity of scars and blemishes make Eddie’s mouth water.

He wants.

So he gets a little reckless.

As usual, Steve is waiting for him, though this time, it’s to finally take home the victory. A practically naked Steve Harrington-Munson goes flying through the air, darts firing off as his body is taken by gravity to the ground. The sticky bits on the front of them are cold against Eddie’s skin, though that’s so far from Eddie’s mind.

His thumbs are already in his pants when Steve gets up and hurries over to him.

“Here, let me,” Steve practically purrs, his hands replacing Eddie’s without him actually giving the other permission. Though, Eddie thinks the white gold band on Steve’s left ring finger is enough of a yes for his husband to pretty much do whatever he wants. Especially when the heaviness of his erection is finally within that talented grasp.

Except, Steve doesn’t move to wrap his hand around Eddie’s cock. Instead, he leans forward and presses his nose into the soft hair at the bottom of Eddie’s stomach. Growing up brought him the sort of happy trail Steve can’t get enough of. His fingers or lips or tongue play in it more often than Eddie can actually recall. It’s lovely and so good, Eddie’s cock jumps in anticipation.

“Eager,” Steve whispers, though he does nothing to act on the teasing words. He simply wraps both arms around Eddie’s waist, keeping him close.

Despite the lust trying to take him over, Eddie is grateful for the closeness. It’s been such a long time since they took the time to have unadulterated fun together. Adult life is bull shit and both of them are so busy, it’s hard to find the sort of time that allows for this sort of thing. Simple connection and enjoyment of each other is a tough thing to manage.

So, Eddie allows the slow seduction of Steve’s hold. He can feel his husband’s own want against the lower part of his leg as Steve pushes in a little closer. Whatever is on Eddie’s mind is obviously mimicked in the dark caverns of Steve’s, too. Knowing that makes it easier to hang on when Steve starts to kiss and nip at Eddie’s skin.

“Fuck – “ Eddie groans out of nowhere, completely overwhelmed. Just having Steve there, on his knees, happily toying with him after an amazing night – it’s almost too much.

That thought is quickly replaced with blankness – Steve’s lips are eager and wet and so very good. They wrap around the head of Eddie’s cock without any further preamble. It’s almost like Eddie imagined Steve’s teasing, even though a wet trail of spit and eagerness is tangible on Eddie’s lower belly. A mouth around his cock is enough to make him stupid and forgetful, Eddie isn’t going to deny that.

The slow pace is gone so quickly, Eddie’s head spins. Steve’s lips slip down and around the length of Eddie’s dick, slicking the skin up there so the slide is easier with each sloppy pass. The pace Steve sets is ludicrous and going to get Eddie off quickly. Instead of fighting the tide, Eddie reaches down to thrust a hand through Steve’s thick hair. Even after all these years, the coif is still alive and well. It never gets old, destroying the poof of it.

Thoughts and ideas drip out of Eddie’s brain – Steve is managing to suck out the organ through another. Eddie is dumbfounded by the sharp way the entirety of him lets go and gives into the feeling. After the week he’s been having, Eddie is in no position to deny pleasure given to him so very freely.

Tickly fingers against his balls does him in. Steve’s mouth is talented, pulling moves off that Eddie is still unable to replicate. He takes Eddie in to the base until Steve’s nose is pressed against the hair he’s such a fan of. As that happens, Steve swallows and rolls Eddie’s balls in his hand. There’s not a chance in hell that Eddie is making it out alive on the other side of that.

His chest heaves with Steve’s name and a litany of moans Eddie is unable to choke back. The hand in Steve’s hair tightens almost painfully. He feels Steve moan around him and it’s all over. Pulse after pulse of cum slide down Steve’s throat, choking the taller man with hot jizz.

Steve is a champion that takes every last drop of it. He pulls back with a satisfied smirk before quickly climbing to his feet. As he does, Eddie’s hand in his hair drops to his side, though Steve is fast to grab at it. Fingers around Eddie’s wrist guide him to Steve’s needy erection that’s tenting boxers with little bats on them. Despite them originally being a joke gift, Eddie gets a little giddy when Steve wears them.

His attention is subverted from the mushy stuff when Steve pants, “touch me,” seconds before leaning in to press a firm kiss against Eddie’s lips. He’s let go of Eddie’s wrist in favor of cupping rosy cheeks. His grip allows Steve to deepen the kiss right as Eddie sticks his hand under the waistband of those glorious boxers.

It takes no time at all for Eddie to pull Steve to the brink. The weird angle of fabric in the way makes the tug and pull of Eddie’s hand that much better. For some reason, it’s like being back in Wayne’s trailer, learning each other all over again.

Steve pants into Eddie’s mouth, groaning out the sweetest noises. Eddie is proud to say he’s the only one for many, many years that’s been privy to that glorious music. He owns Steve’s orgasms, draws them out with his own hands and lips, makes him feel better and better each time they come together like this. Steve even says so as he cums with shaking legs and a huff of breath against Eddie’s lips.

Floating back down to Earth is a steady thing that allows Steve to cling to Eddie. They’re standing in the middle of the living room, completely unworried about their nakedness or the fact that it’s only six in the evening. The sun is still out, even.

When Eddie feels like Steve is able to speak again, he pulls back slightly, grinning his megawatt smile reserved for Steve and Steve alone. “Naked Nerf fight?” Eddie asks, still a bit incredulous about what just happened.

With a chuckle, Steve leans his head forward until it’s resting against Eddie’s collarbone. “We’ve got to keep our marriage alive somehow,” Steve mumbles, pressing kisses to Eddie’s skin all the while. “Why not beat each other up with soft darts and shit talk?”

Instead of answering right away, Eddie wraps Steve up again, keeping him close. He revels in the love he feels in that moment, tucking it away for the next time life gets him down. Once this memory is safe and sound, Eddie presses a kiss to Steve’s head. He’s happy and content. Filled with joy instead of dissatisfaction.

And it’s all Steve’s fault.

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