#the feast of realms

[annemarieyeretzian]

The Legend of Vox Machina S01E03: The Feast of Realms ★

[ravenquingvax]

Okay but I rewatched The Feast Of Realms again and I can't get this stupid scenario out of my head now - Fuck you, Scanlan Shorthalt.

Fuck you.

Anyway-

So remember how when Grog picks "chenga" for the safe word when Vax goes off to do hot rogue things, Scanlan comments on how he personally uses "mommy"?

I can't stop thinking about what if, while panicking and thinking he's dying, Vax accidentally said "mommy" instead of "chenga" before he passed out?

Like. Just, imagine you are Sylas Briarwood in that moment.

You live a pretty uneventful life in the castle you took over with your sexy wife who works for a god in the making and the teenage girl your wife forcibly adopted.

Then one day you get invited to an important state dinner and your wife decides to take the opportunity to make sure nobody pays Whitestone a visit and to ensure there's nothing to worry about.

Now you probably don't get to do lots, your wife is too paranoid about your health and safety despite you being a very big and strong vampire now.

You expect this all to be boring and quite uneventful, maybe dangerous even giving how you have to avoid direct sunlight now.

Then you get ambushed by mortals on the way over and your wife lets you stretch your legs to deal with the poor bastards.

You think, great! This is probably the most I'll get to do during this.

Then you arrive at the dinner to find the brother of your adopted daughter is still alive and angry at you + he has friends now.

And while you charm the Sovereign, your wife decides to passively torment the boy for fun.

Then when the boy meltsdown, you and wifey take that as your que to leave - you have not only secured your safety from the state but now the boy has lost trust and respect from the Sovereign.

But getting to your guest room you find a spy has broken in and that he looks like the pretty girl who was here with the angry boy, but this spy tries to play servant and even flirts with you and your wife.

You decide to have him for dinner and even get a lil handsy with him, possibly as foreplay for fun times with the wifey afterwards 👀😳👀, but then he escapes and yeets himself out a window.

So of course you give chase, only for this motherfucker to call you mommy of all things before he passes out in a bloodied fountain.

Like, how do you react to that???

[aspiringsophrosyne]

Episode 3: The Feast of Realms

What can be improved?

So....let's talk about episode 3.

Dinner With The Briarwoods.

This bit is mostly personal preference, but there's something here beyond that. Something I would like to get into so that we can come back to it later.

One thing I really enjoyed about the stream counterpart to this episode was the slow. Fucking. Burn.

Sadly, we weren't going to get nearly as much of a slow burn in the animated show; we have much, much less time to draw out tension and suspense. That said...I don't really understand the choice to change the circumstances around the dinner to make the scene as quick of a burn as it was.

Because now we have The Echo Tree, and the talk in Syldor's office.

That talk in Syngorn was exactly what I expected from the Briarwood dinner. It perfectly translated to animated medium the same horrible, slimy unease that comes from having to tolerate absolute vileness under a mask of civility because you just can't do anything else in the moment.

So....what up with that?

It's possible the writing crew didn't have the confidence three episodes in to try something so subtle...

But if that's not it, then why?

Adapting the dinner more closely to the stream would've served it just as well if not better. Both stream Percy and animated Percy are relatively quiet characters up to this point (especially compared to the other main characters). Letting animated Percy know about the Briarwoods in advance, letting him stay quiet, letting him subtly and silently boil at the Briarwoods audacity makes the resulting explosion of violence and irrationality that much more striking.

The CRew have said they didn't want the series to be a one-to-one adaptation. It can't be, and even if it could they wanted even stream watchers to occasionally be surprised. I respect and approve of that. However....while I can see the purpose behind other changes in the animated series (which I'll get into when they come up) I don't see what we get out of this one.

......I also think Vax with the Briarwoods in their room could've been dragged out just a little bit longer, but that's just a nitpick.

The Twins' Bond.

Recently on the TLOVM S2E12 q&a, Matt confirmed that the reason Vex couldn't sense Vax's presence in The Hope Devourer was because the golden life thread that had previously connected them had been redirected to the Matron of Ravens. Before this, they shared what was effectively a psychic twin bond, which allowed them to tell when one of them was in danger.

This....is not communicated incredibly well in the series up to this point.

What we get in The Feast of Realms is Vex inexplicably reacting to Vax being in trouble and knowing where he is, with no explanation or exposition. It basically comes across as a plot contrivance.

And it wouldn't have been hard at all to set up; while VM are talking and Vax volunteers to go scouting, Vex could've reassured the group that the twins have always had a sixth sense for each other. (You can even put in a gag here where she pinches him and they both react in pain at the same time.)

"I can always feel it if you're in trouble. And where you are when you get in trouble. So don't fuck it up. Or I will find you."

"Whatever you say, stubby."

Hell, they could've made it even more explicit than that by showing a golden thread pulling on Vex while her brother was downed in the courtyard. This would not only cause her to worry for him but would pull her in the correct direction.

This would've made it clear that there's an in-world reason Vox Machina was able to get to Vax in time. This would also set up Vax's deal with the Matron quite nicely. If the bond between the twins had been better established by that point, it being cut would have immediately communicated to the audience just how big a deal Vax's bargain was.

And how much it really changed what the twins once shared between them.

The Fight

One thing I have very, very little to criticize in this series and one thing Titmouse does exceptionally well is its fight sequences. Everything is kinetic, has weight, you can feel the damage being done to the participants, you feel the stakes....it's great.

What I think they have a problem with though, is cutting to scenes during a fight that have nothing to do with the action.

Let's look at how the show cuts back to Scanlan in the middle of the Briarwood fight:

The gang got kicked around for a bit, to the point where Keyleth and Vex were knocked off their feet and confered with each other:

Keyleth: We're not doing terrible, right?

Vex: No, this is terrible.

And then....we cut to Scanlan.....

For some reason?

This isn't to say that it's a bad idea in and of itself. Cutting back to the palace theoretically gives us a moment of comic relief, it can break tension, and/or drive up tension by pulling us away from the action while it's still ongoing. Also, Sam and Peter Habib's song writing is always a welcome addition to any episode.

The problem is the placement of it. Why did we cut to Scanlan then, at that point in the fight? What specifically did it give us to have it occur at that particular moment?

By all appearances, not much.

So, what can we do to make that moment more effective? There are probably a couple of ways, but here's just one possible example:

Have Delilah launch a very visually impressive spell at Vox Machina. Build up its approach. Have the camera pull in closer and closer to our heroes' faces to show this very dangerous spell getting closer and closer....only to cut away, right before it hits, to the inside of the palace. A loud bang is heard inside; maybe it even rattles the windows. The crowd notices and starts getting visibly and/or audibly confused and worried. Scanlan notices them noticing, then with desperate quick thinking, starts slathering cake all over himself and going into the climax of the song.

Placed this way, this scene serves multiple purposes:

It's one more thing that shows just how powerful Delilah is. Even people inside the palace are taking notice of her magic.

As mentioned earlier, it drives up suspense and cuts tension at the same time, as we see Vox Machina about to be hit by a powerful spell (that we hear go off inside the palace) but we don't get to see the result of it for a bit.

Having Scanlan notice this and then turn up the wildness of his act to try to distract the crowd gives him a touch of extra depth. Yes, Scanlan is a naturally outrageous character. But this helps show he uses his natural outrageousness strategically. This serves as a good example of why Scanlan is so integral to the group. Plus, it fits neatly with the way Sam would play at the table and how many people play Bards in D&D in general.

Lastly, it sets up Uriel and the palace guards coming upon the aftermath of the Briarwood fight at the end of the episode.

The Feast of Realms is a very solid episode, and arguably it's where everything really kicks off. There isn't much to really pick at here; just little bits and pieces that I think could've been done slightly better. Overall, damn well done, and surprisingly accurate to the stream as well.

[smoky-de-rolo]

“You…”

Percy reloads the List as he stalks over to the driver and kicks him to the ground.

“Start talking. Why were the Briarwoods here? What were they after?”

“They were invited like you. By Sovereign Uriel.”

“Sylas and Delilah have never left the confines of Whitestone before. Why here? Why now??”

He points the List between the driver’s eyes. Smoke begins emanating from the cuff of his sleeve and the collar of his jacket.

“Answer me…now.”

He puts on his mask.

Vax: “What the actual fuck?”

Vex: “Holy shit, Percy. What are you doing?”

Keyleth covers her mouth with her hand.

“Please I’m-I’m only a servant. They-they don’t tell me anything! Please don’t hurt me, please don’t hurt me!”

The driver brings his arm up in a futile attempt to Sheila’s himself as Percy points the List at him.

Percy shoots.

The driver screams as the five fingers of his hand go flying behind him.

Vex: “Percy, stop!”

The driver cries and screams desperately drags himself away with his one hand. Percy calmly walks up to him as his shadow grows impossibly larger. He places a foot on the driver and points the gun at him once again. His shadow seems to have claws, reaching down to the young driver.

“You fool. Now your soul is forfeit.”

[sclki-op]

[3starart]

my friend's telling me to post on tumblr dot com again

[alaynasansa]

Sansa Stark remembering Waymar Royce

[greyspirehollow]

Chains

Pairing : Quaestor Valdemar x Liam (mc oc) ; platonic Fandom : The Arcana visual novel Warnings : angst ; hurt/comfort (still not good at warning tags grgrg)

Summary : Reverse ending ; Thinking they have betrayed him by aiding Liam becoming the new Patron Arcana of Death, the Devil punishes Valdemar (nothing related to assault, don't worry). But this cruel treatment will not go unnoticed...

The room was dark. The only source of light was the faint red glow of the chains that bound the Quaestor kneeling to the floor. The air was filled with the scent of burnt papers and parchments. They could still feel the trace of the quiet tears they'd shed when the Devil left, despite keeping their face as expressionless as possible. They were pretty sure they had bruises, and the tip of their right horn threatened to fall off at any moment because of how they'd struggled against their binds. They knew their labcoat was scratched, and that their bandages were loose. They could feel strands of hair tickle the skin of their cheeks. This... was simply cruel. Unjustified. After their centuries, their millenias of loyal services, how could the Devil possibly treat them like this?? They hadn't crossed any lines, not in the terms of their deal at least... So why? Their gaze remained on the floor as they let their thoughts consume them. What else could they possibly be doing? Struggle against the chains some more? To what end? They wouldn't yield.

But their train of thoughts was interrupted by the distant muffle of voices...

______________________________________________________________

In the corridors, some of Death's troupes looked around the rooms, opening every door they could, seemingly searching for something. Or someone. The skeletons were quick and efficient as Death advanced slowly, surveilling the operation. His cape flowed softly with each step he took. The skeletal soldier's search was fruitless so far, but it was also interrupted by a red figure down the hall. "...Vulgora." Death muttered, similarly to a greeting. Probably posted there to guard the halls, the Pontifex yielded a double bit great axe. But their expression lacked the usual bloodthirst and thrill of battle. As if... They didn't want to fight. Death was skeptical ; they'd always loved fighting. But he didn't have time to reflect upon that much : they charged at his soldiers, determined, and made the bones cackle and fall to the ground each time they'd seem them rebuild themselves. Death marched towards them, and drew their sword. He did well, because the Pontifex charged at him next. He blocked their attack, momentarily face to face with them. "They're on the second floor" if it could've conveyed confusion, Death's skeletal face would've upon hearing Vulgora's words. "The last door to the left." They sounded... worried. Death nodded and pushed them off, letting them pretend to fight off part of his troupes and taking only three soldiers with him as they rushed upstairs. He heard the Pontifex pretend to chase after them, and give up once he was halfway up the stairs. He climbed the marches one after the other.

______________________________________________________________

The sounds and muffled voices grew closer. Valdemar couldn't make out the words being said -what was the point, anyway?- but could only distinguish the clinking of metal on the floor. The steps grew closer.

"General ! They're in here !"

what...?

The door was pound against, exactly five times, before it fell off its hinges, hitting the floor with a loud thud and blowing an air current that made them squint their eyes, in addition to the sudden pool of light red light pouring from outside the dark room. They caught the glimpse of four silhouettes, three human sized ones and another, more imposing, standing in the center. The three smaller frames returned into the corridor, and seemed to go keep an eye on the surrounding area, the light they basked in revealing skeletons in armor. The Quaestor's gaze then landed on the fourth shadow : it slowly started approaching. On the floor, it noticed the carcasses of journals, books, files and parchments. And a copious amount of them, too... Two little green lights served as eyes to them, and Vlademar recognized those. Their teeth greeted together, but they couldn't find anything to tell him. Liam. The reason they were in this mess in the first place... That foolish necromancer, taking the place of the thirteenth major Arcana... They briefly looked back at the ground, but their head instantly snapped back up as they saw him crouch down beside a burnt book, about to touch the crispy pitch black pages. "GET YOUR HANDS OFF OF THAT!!" They shouted, instinctively getting up on their feet, only to be dragged back down by the red chains, drawing a pained grunt out of them. Their shoulders hunched slightly. Liam's hand immobilized in the air and he looked at them. They briefly wished they could still read his expression in this moment... "...Your research." he simply commented. They knew he was right. He got up, and slowly walked towards them. Their gaze was suddenly drawn to his sword, as it morphed into a scythe in his hand. They looked up right at those greenish lights he had for eyes now, their gaze unwavering. Death towered over them... They looked at him grip the weapon with both hands and raise it above his skull. He was going to do it, wasn't he? They weren't even mad. They found themselves... Strangely determined. Fine. After all, maybe it was the greatest service he could make them in th-

SHCLANK.

THUD.

....

....

..

The chains...

He'd aimed for the chains. Eyes wide, they looked at one of the metallic binds that was snapped in two by the scythe, and had fallen to the ground. Liam then snapped the other one.

SHCLANK.

THUD.

They felt the remaining ones around their body loosen, setting their upper body free. They looked at their shaky hands, and then back up at Liam.. Confused. He'd crouched down to their level. Despite the lack of... basically anything that could convey emotions on his face, they felt no ill will or threatening aura coming from him. As if... He wanted... to help...

"Do you think you can walk?"

The lich's raspy and otherworldly voice asked. "How can I possibly trust you?" was their immediate response, which they briefly regretted. Liam didn't seem fazed however. Even... Understanding. He removed the glove of his right hand, exposing his bones to the dark room's air, and reached for one of the burnt books that laid at their feet. They were about to protest again, gripping his wrist to yank it away from the fragile paper, but as soon as one of his bony digits made contact with it, it's as if the book was reborn. The pages found their normal consistency, and their handwriting appeared through the book again. Their jaw hung slack in a mix of confusion and bewilderment. "I thought... Y-you said it didn't work with..." they looked back at his orbits, inhabited by those two green lights, their gaze unable to hide their emotion. "This is... One of Death's tricks. A very brief reversal of time. It only works on objects..." He replied, as he got up and removed his other glove, going around and picking one by one the journals, the files and parchments, each seemingly coming back to life as he touched them. Valdemar was stuck in shock, still on their knees on the floor, the overwhelming amount of emotions swarming them without a single warning. He... He had to have ulterior motives. It couldn't be out of... kindness. Their brows furrowed "What do you want?? wh-why are you doing this?!" as they got back up on their feet, their hands slightly shaky. Liam looked back at them "...Do I need a reason to help a friend?"

...

Friend...? "You mean... Fiend." "I mean... Friend." Shock appeared on their features once more. Death took a slight breath and spoke up again : "But if it is easier for you, consider this a thank you for helping me get where I am now. A... Payback, if you will." he paused, turning around to face them "But the truth is, I only wish to help." The Quaestor stood there, dumbfounded, their brows knitted together due to... Whatever emotion they were currently feeling. They observed as Liam went around the room, picking up each and every single document that the Devil had previously burnt right before their eyes. They watched as he carefully arranged it all in a pile, then a mount as more and more documents were added. They took a few steps forward, their shaky hand reaching for one of the journals, flipping through the pages, then reaching for another one, and another, and another... Tears welled up in their eyes as they held at least a dozen against their chest, crumbling back to their knees and hunching protectively over them, as if they'd vanish if they let go. Their researches... Their life's work, their reason to live... Nearly wiped out like a speck of dust. They couldn't help the tears. Yes, they could muffle their sobs, and yes, they could hide their face against the pile of journals, but they couldn't stop the subtle shaking of their shoulders... Nor the bony hand that gently settled on their back and started caressing it soothingly, Liam crouching beside them.

______________________________________________________________

After a while of such deep and sudden emotions, Death stood back up, ordering his three soldiers to fetch the others, so all of them could carry the mount of documents out of this place. Valdemar took with them as much as they could, their legs slightly wobbly from the whole ordeal, as they, Death, and the soldiers hurried downstairs. They left the damned halls of the Devil's palace, and at the entrance, the Quaestor's eyes widened as they laid upon a familiar centaur-like figure. The horse skull turned to look at them "well, would you look at that! Quaestor Valdemar, in the flesh. It's been a while" Death. Their throat tightened and they looked at the ground in shame. This... All of this was starting to become a little too much. "Cut them some slack" Liam spoke softly, patting Death's flank. "I'm going to need you to carry them home. The Devil's not been kind with them..." Death nodded, although slightly bitter, lowering themselves so Valdemar could mount them, while the lich walked on foot. The Quaestor desperately clung to the journals in their arms, and as the gentle rocking motion of Death's pace nudged them, they felt exhaustion start to close onto them, despite their best attempt to keep their eyes open and surveil the soldiers which carried the rest of their researches.

______________________________________________________________

They woke up in what looked like a cottage, resting on a couch, with a thick blanket over them and a plush pillow under their head. They blinked awake, looking around, noticing Liam sitting at a table. The lich was studying what looked like maps ; there was a warm fire going in the fireplace. Their eyes lingered on the flames for a while before returning to Liam. They observed his skeletal hands carefully holding the paper, before their red eyes looked out the window, into the snowy forest around. The sight felt much less dreadful than they remember. The soft creaking of Liam's chair drew their attention. "Ah, you're awake. How do you feel?" It was... paradoxal to have Death sound so soothing... Or maybe it wasn't. "...Better." Warm. "That is great to hear." he put the map down on the wooden table, getting up to reach for a set of keys and picked two from it. He then walked over to Valdemar and gently placed the keys in their hand. "It's to access a small shed I have built nearby. I've made it so your research could be stored there, in Death's realm." yet another emotional blow for Valdemar. But of gratitude, this time. They closed their eyes and let out a soft sigh to keep their composure. "...Thank you." Liam nodded. "It's my pleasure." He was about to return to his table when Valdemar gripped his sleeve. He turned around. They'd stood up ; they seemed to be contemplating something. Their eyes briefly scanned Liam up and down, before they gulped and extended their arms, before wrapping them around him, in a clumsy hug. A warm feeling spread in the lich's chest as he embraced their smaller frame back.

Valdemar could've never guessed Death's embrace could ever be this soft and welcoming.

[thinking-about-bats-again]

Random facts and canon tidbits from Heroes’ Feast: The Official D&D Cookbook

Dwarven cuisine doesn’t use many spices because dwarves have extra-sensitive taste buds and can detect complicated flavors in simple dwarven dishes like potato leek soup and corned beef and cabbage.

Halfling dishes include community cheeses (cheese fondue), melted cheeses (grilled cheese), oatmeal sweet nibbles (oatmeal cookies), and hogs in bedrolls (pigs in a blanket).

One recipe, Elven Bread, is said to be able to sustain an adventurer for a full day with only one bite. No, it’s not like any other fictional elven breads from famous high fantasy worlds. It’s cinnamon-swirled!

Speaking of totally original, legally distinct fantasy concepts, halfling meals include “second morningfeast.”

Dragonborns live in communal clans and eat mostly meat. As a result, they invented Brazilian barbecue. (Be careful when attending one, though, as some of the meat is from humanoids.)

Tieflings are the opposite of dwarves: their taste buds are charred, so they prefer extremely strong flavors. They also have a high spice tolerance, to the point where most tiefling spices could kill a human.

Half-orcs, being nomadic scavengers, often eat insects and grubs. Sometimes, they fry them or drizzle them in chocolate.

The book includes menus for restaurants on four different worlds. The menu for The Yawning Portal, a Forgotten Realms restaurant, offers four types of cheese. Checking the Forgotten Realms Wiki, I found that all four cheeses are from previous canon material, but the funniest one is Luiren Spring, which, according to the wiki, is a hard drug for halflings.

[bleakbluejay]

new oc. i don't have a real name for her yet.

she's nicknamed the "Spider Hag". she's the warden of a supposedly haunted forest. "wardens" are high lords of historic families tasked with protecting regions of the realm. people think her forest is haunted because she has filled the place with an intricate web of traps -- snares, pits, nets, and so on -- to keep poachers and trespassers from passing through the forest, making it seem like those with ill intent never come back from the forest. most who see her see only her dark silhouette in the gloom of trees, and mistake the flaps of her coif for horns, and her dark cloak as shadow wrapping her up. they spread rumors that she is a witch or a demon that guards the forest. those that have met her know she is very kindly. she's polite, generous, gentle. she has a strong relationship with the local villagers, who maintain her reputation as a demon, and she provides them with high quality game and forage in return. as kindly as she is, though, there's something... off... about her. the way her wide, pale eyes scan a room, look right through you, track your every move. the way she lingers in the treeline and watches you as you pass through her woods. the way her soft, polite smiles never quite reach her eyes.

[belsasim]

When they approached Kanaloa's place, the Dreamers were met with the mouthwatering smells of the now ready island feast. The children were amazed at how good something could taste after being covered with palm leaves for hours. They fired a barrage of questions to Kanaloa about all the edible things of the islands.

Then, they begged him for embarrassing tales of Rayne's youth. Kanaloa gave Rayne a look, who just smiled and shrugged. "There's really not that much to tell, kids," he tried, but he was betrayed by Kanaloa's loud laugh. Rayne sighed with a smile: "Ok, ok, fine, just get it over with... At least, Kana is a great story teller!"And boy, he was. For the rest of the evening, the children (as well as Sarah and Rayne) were hanging on Kanaloa's lips.

[pl9090]

As it is Empire month here is a band tour poster for the Feast of Fools.

[ccaptain]

Me, with a tomorrow full of fluffy/romantic memes and a long post about H:SR Kaeya's depersonalization and how he feels about it: that Rihanna winking gif

[teen-spirited-away]

The pov's set in Kings Landing are always a delight to read. Everyone there is always scheming and hating each other passive aggressively.

[tharelofthewoodlandrealm]

hc that mirkwood looks sth like the pandora forest from avatar at night with all the bioluminescent mushrooms and moss and flowers

[nightswatchdisbandmentera]

Of Kings and Pigs

I did a post before about how GRRM connects Jon Snow to Westeros’ ruling kings through laughter, but today I want to do one on how Jon is connected to these rulers through the imagery of pigs…

Let’s start with Jon. He takes an arrow to the leg after defecting from the wildlings and notes:

I am bleeding like a butchered pig, he thought, but there was nothing to be done for it until the arrow was out.

- Jon V, ASOS

So now, let’s look at which kings in the story are compared to pigs, especially bloody ones.

The first king is Aerys II, Jon’s grandfather.

Beneath the empty eyes of the skulls on the walls, Jaime hauled the last dragonking bodily off the steps, squealing like a pig and smelling like a privy.

- Jaime II, ASOS

In my previous post, I noted that Jon and Aerys were linked through laughter. There, it is said that Jon laughed like a drunk or a madman. We know that his grandfather, King Aerys, is the madman but who is the drunk?

Well, that brings us to our next king, Robert Baratheon.

“Look at us, Ned,” Robert said. “Gods, how did we come to this? You here, and me killed by a pig. We won a throne together …”

- Eddard XV, AGOT

So we have a connection between Jon and two butchered kings who have sat upon the Iron Throne. But we have a more general connection with all the kings in Westeros:

The cooks were serving the meat course: five suckling pigs, skin seared and crackling, a different fruit in every mouth.

- Tyrion VIII, AGOT

The quote above seems to be foreshadowing for the coming war of the five kings. Each pig has a different fruit in its mouth in the same way that each king held a different region in the war.

So we have rulers occupying all of Westeros being connected to butchered pigs, and then we have the bastard boy Jon Snow - who, while unaware of his royal blood, is marked as KING by the narrative.