#the index card just said “lol

[awholebunchobananas]

Ah, yeah, whoops

I’m sorry guys I think I may have been the one to cause Good Omens Season 2 to go the way it did

See, I wished on this thing that GO2 would have the Angel and Demon fall in love, and that they would kiss

But don’t worry I’ve still got a third wish on it, that dice roll has to go my way one of these days

[reysdriver]

Driver's License | Keys

You decide to tease your friend after seeing his real name on his ID — coworker!keys x reader fluff

warnings: alcohol consumption since the oneshot takes place at a bar

words: 0.8k

a/n: this is my first keys fic and I know this is niche as hell but i've been obsessed with him lately so expect more lol

The bar was one of the more popular ones—which means there’s sometimes a line outside in the cold—but it was the one you always went to because it was walking distance from work. You, Keys, and Mouser stood in line shivering and wondering what was taking so damn long. 

“Should we just go somewhere else?” You asked the guys. 

“No, it’s fine.” Keys answered. “We’re almost at the front anyways.”

Mouser looked like he was about to say otherwise, but then dropped his protests. “Keys, can you like, stand on your toes and see what’s going on?”

He obliged and stood up as tall as he could, looking for the front of the line. After a few seconds of the most perfect posture you’d ever seen on your friend, he slumped back down to his normal height. 

“It’s not the regular bouncer. This one’s checking, like, everyone’s IDs for five minutes each.” Keys explained, pulling out his wallet already.

You held back a laugh at the obvious hyperbole and thanked him for the update on what was taking this line so long to move. 

Keys was right; you were actually close to the front of the line. It was still unbearably cold and it wasn’t even winter yet. Keys saw your discomfort and wrapped an arm around you. Maybe that was more than a coworker slash friend should do, but hey, you work at a video game company: nothing was really like other workplaces. 

Once you were finally at the doors, the new bouncer asked for IDs from all three of you—which you thought was ridiculous because none of you looked like you were minors—and thoroughly scanned each one of them. 

Yours was first, and maybe the quickest. Mouser showed his ID next, and then it was Keys’ turn. The worker looked at his driver’s license for longer than he had yours and Mouser’s, then passed it back to Keys with the card in between his index and middle finger. 

Keys seemed to be in a rush to put it back into his wallet, and when you caught a glimpse of it as he shut the leather flaps, you understood why. 

Your friend had never told you his real name before. Come to think of it, you weren’t sure he’s told anyone. What was perhaps his biggest secret was now in your hands, and there were infinite possibilities on what to do with it. 

You kept quiet while the group picked a booth to sit at, then went up to order a round of kamikaze shots to start the night off with a bang. After you’d all taken one shot together, Mouser went off to use the washroom, leaving just you and Keys together. 

Impatient as always, you had decided now was the time to do something with your newly acquired information. Biting back a smile, you tried to act as inconspicuous as possible. 

“You know what?” You started. “I know we still have a round of shots, but I’m gonna head up to the bar and get something with as many maraschino cherries as they’ll let me have. Do you want anything?”

He shook his head, smiling at your drink request. “No, I’m alright. I’ll stay here.”

You stood up, bringing a dollar bill from your purse to tip the bartender. “Okay, I’ll be back, Walter.”

He didn’t even notice your use of his name at first. But when your words played back over in his head—as most things you say to him do—his eyes widened and he shot up from the seat. 

“How did you— I don’t tell people my real name.” Keys said softly but urgently. 

You smiled at him. “I know. I saw it on your driver’s license outside. I just wanted to tease you a bit since I’m now one of the only people in the world who knows it.”

“You are.” He confirmed. “Just, please don’t use it at work or anything. I just think it’s embarrassing.”

“More embarrassing than ‘Keys’?” You giggled. You started walking towards the bar, and he followed closely behind. “You don’t need to worry, though. I like being the keeper of your secret.”

Relief washed over his face. “Thank you.”

You waved over one of your favourite bartenders, then brought your attention back to Keys. “Just for the record, I actually like your real name. It’s like a cute old man you live next to and bring in the newspaper for.” 

He bit the inside of his cheek and stood up from the barstool. “You know, just for that, I do want a drink. You’re buying it for me.”

You rubbed his upper arm to confirm there was nothing bad between you. “I’ll surprise you, Walt.” You told him as he walked back to your booth. 

Unsurprisingly, you were met with his turned back and a middle finger flipped at you. 

[btsgotjams27]

fool for you ~ jjk | 3

Jungkook wants to go to another party, but you have other things in mind.

✨ title: fool for you | ✨ pairing: jungkook x f!reader ✨ word count: 5.7k | ✨ rating: pg-13 ✨ genre/au: fluff, light angst | college, fake dating, strangers to friends to lovers ✨ warnings: language, light touching(?), sexual innuendos, long hair yoongi shows up for a like a split second, jungkook is a sweetheart, mild jealously, flirting, this is just a very sweet chapter ✨ a/n: i'm in shambles after writing this chapter. honestly, i think i included too much lol. also, i'm a california babe at heart, so yeah, you'll see why :) but anywho, i hope you all enjoy this sweet, fluffy chapter. 💜 Any feedback, reblogs, asks are appreciated.

[ SERIES MASTERLIST ] prev | next ✨ part four

The next day was hell. You vowed never to get drunk again. One of the stupidest things you've ever done. And for what reason? What exactly did it prove? Almost certainly nothing. Jieun probably didn't think much of you after last night. She was right. You could barely hold your liquor.

You groaned, rubbing your temples at the pounding in your head. Someone seemed to be stomping around all night with no intention of stopping.

"Rise and shine, sleepyhead," said a cheerful voice, making your head throb even more.

Ugh–what time is it? And it wasn't Lyla's voice. You groaned again as you opened your eyes to see Jungkook. What exactly was he doing here, and how did he get in?

"You can't get enough of me, can you?" Looking down, you realized you were still wearing the same clothes you wore the night before, and you didn't have a bra on - instead, you noticed it on your chair.

Oh god–what did you do? And who took off your bra? Did you? Did Jungkook? At least it was a cute bra.

You rubbed your face, noticing the black on your hand as you drew back. You didn't even wash your face? You groaned again, pulling your duvet over your face, embarrassed that Jungkook had witnessed your worst behavior.

Jungkook chuckled. "Mm. That is precisely why I am here." He tried to pull the duvet, but you held on tight, refusing to let go. "No, but I'm going to a party tonight, and you're invited."

"Another party? We just went to one." You whined, pulling the cover down and scowling at his request. The last one was a disaster, and you didn't want another round with Jieun if she was going to be there - fighting with his ex wasn't part of the deal.

"That was yesterday," he said casually as he sat by the foot of your bed, motioning for you to lift your feet and place them on top of his thighs.

You stared blankly at the cute boy, who suddenly became at ease enough to sit on your bed and begin massaging your feet. You quickly backed away from his grasp. "I have to study today. Sorry, Jungkook, you'll have to go alone."

With only a few weeks left of the semester, your world literature final wasn't going to ace itself.

Jungkook wavered in his thoughts for a moment, then turned to you. "What if I help you study, and then you go with me to the party? It's a win-win for everyone."

He wasn't going to let this go, was he? Did he want another night like last night? "You know, other than drinking and partying, there are other ways to have fun."

Jungkook gasped dramatically, holding his hand to his chest. "There is? Like what?"

"Skip the party and find out."

Jungkook was intrigued, as demonstrated by his expression. He appeared ready to say something, but you cut him off: "Study first, then we'll have fun."

You flipped through your index cards while glaring at Jungkook. What was the point of him joining you and helping if he was only going to sleep? So you struck him in the shin beneath the table.

"Wha–what's happening?" He asked, poking his head up, all sleepy-eyed.

"Wake up, Jungkook! I thought you would help me study," you yelled at him in hushed tones. He muttered something that you couldn't understand. "If you're just going to sleep, go to the party. I'll see you whenever you want, "You fussed as you packed your laptop and books.

So much for being a friend. Did he not know the first thing about what friends do for each other? This exam was worth 20% of your grade, and you weren't going to let some stupid boy hold you back.

"Hold on–sorry, I'm up. I'm up," Jungkook perked up, reaching for your arm, but you were already down the aisle, returning the book.

"It's fine," you wave him off as he follows you. "I'll just go back to my dorm to study." You shook your head. You had no idea what you were thinking when you asked Jungkook for help or even to be your friend. Really, it was stupid - wishful thinking.

You set your bag down next to you, on your tiptoes, trying to reach the second row from the top, and the stupid books would move for you to put back the book. Jungkook tried to take the book and help you, but you refused. Looking around, you grabbed a step stool and attempted to replace the book.

"Lemme help you, come on."

You ignored him, tippy towing the books with your fingers barely touching the edge.  But you finally pushed the book through a spot, relieved that you didn't need Jungkook's help.

You faced Jungkook, ready to step off the stool, but you lost your footing, landing in his arms and causing a commotion as the stool collided with a row of books.

"Clumsy much?" He teased you while helping you to your feet.

You gave him a scowl. "Jungkook, if you don't want to be my friend, that's fine. That's it; our deal is over."

You wouldn't put effort into a friendship if he didn't care about his end of the bargain.

"Hey–" He held your arm, causing you to turn to face him. "I'm sorry, okay? I'm just not used to this whole friendship thing. Jieun and I never really had that–we were never really friends."

You huffed. It wasn't surprising to hear Jungkook say that–girls were probably ready to jump his bones at any second. Some part of you also felt pity. Maybe Jungkook just didn't know how to be a girl's friend. Not everything had to end in sex—it was never your intention, even if you fantasized about it.

"Forget about the party–it's dumb anyway. What do you need help with? I'm here, and I'm game for whatever you need."

"It's fine, Jungkook. I'm gonna go back to my dorm and study."

"Hey–I meant what I said about being your friend. Come on…"

You sighed, not responding to him. You weren't going to tell him what he should or shouldn't do, and he was free to do whatever he wanted.

Because you didn't respond, Jungkook was unsure what you expected from him. So he followed you out of the library, back to your dorm. You were a few steps ahead of him, and every now and then, you'd look back to see if he was still following you.

You came to a halt as you turned around. "Jungkook, please stop." You couldn't figure out why you were getting so worked up. Over what?  Because Jungkook refused to be your friend? You expected him to give it his all. Your deal didn't last long, and he couldn't keep his end of the bargain.  Did guys that look like Jungkook just not know how to be friends with girls or something?

He moved closer to you. His size towers over yours. When he was close, the familiar fresh scent of his body wash mixed with his cologne began to provide comfort. When he softly called your name, you were distracted from his gaze.

"Can you look at me, please?"

You waited for a beat before doing what he asked. When you saw him darting from your eyes to your lips, you peered into his dark brown eyes, your heart racing. You sighed, waiting for him to continue.

"I'm sorry, okay? I'm sorry for falling asleep and not helping you like I said I would. Can you please let me make it up to you?"

You glared at the cute boy. "Can we skip the party? I'm not looking to get wasted again."

He chuckled. "We'll do anything you want."

"Anything?" You cocked your eyebrow.

As he hummed, Jungkook's lips pursed into a pout. He was curious about what you had planned and what it would involve.

You couldn't help but indulge in self-care after Jungkook said he was up for anything, especially after a drunken night. This will make your skin very happy. You told Jungkook he couldn't complain or whine about anything you had him to do tonight.

Light conversations led the two of you to talk about your favorite movies.

"You've never seen The Breakfast Club? It's a cult classic,” with your mouth agape, you inquired. Who hasn't seen this movie? You were baffled by his lack of knowledge of pop culture or good pop culture.

Jungkook shook his head. "Nope. I've never been a fan of those kinds of films," he said as he carefully removed the sheet mask from its gleaming silver packaging. He pulled it apart and smoothed it over his face.

"Oh my god–" you exclaimed in disbelief. "We're watching this movie right now," you complained as you pushed yourself out of bed to find the remote.

As he lay against your pillows, he groaned in frustration. "It's late, and I'm going to fall asleep."

As he whined, you chuckled at his panda face sheet mask. You had already forced him to paint your nails and his, but the night was far from over. This was your revenge for your previous drunken night. "I'll punch you in the balls if you fall asleep during this movie," you threatened.

He narrowed his eyes at you, grinning, "If you want to touch them, just tell me."

He's at it again, using your crush on him to flirt. Your eyes widened as you balled your fist, raised your arm, and prepared to punch him in the groin. In case you weren't joking, Jungkook quickly blocked his goods.

"Told you, you were different. Other girls would have jumped at the chance to touch them," he slyly said while grabbing a pillow from behind him and placing it next to him. He shifted his weight and spread his legs. "I'm just saying—they're yours to take," he laughed.

You reasoned that two people could play that game. Your gaze darkens as you move closer, crawling between his legs, and kneeling in front of him. When your hands gently caress his thighs, he visibly gulps, inching closer to his ever-so-lightly growing arousal. "Don't flatter yourself, Jungkook," you flirted.

He gave you a half-smile as he looked away, then back at you. Feisty, he thought. "We gonna watch this movie or what?"

Throughout the night, you'd look at Jungkook to see if he was having fun. He appeared to be most interested in the snacks. You rolled your eyes at his constant nibbling. You were wondering how much a guy could eat.

Surprisingly, Jungkook did not complain throughout the movie. He'd pause to comment or laugh, but there were no protests.

The final scene came with John on the field, fist in the air, and the infamous ending credit song, Don't You Forget About Me, by the Simple Minds.

Jungkook thought it was amusing when he discovered you humming along, wondering how many times you'd seen this film. Was it your go-to movie? What did you find so captivating about it?  The characters? The romance?

Clicking the TV off, you turned to face Jungkook. "'Kay–question for you."

He shifted himself, mirroring you. "Go for it."

"Who do you want to be in the film?" You posed a question to everyone who saw the film with you. You liked it because it gave you a taste of who they were.

"Easy–John."

You chuckled. Of course, he did. "And why's that?"

"He's carefree, doesn't give a shit about what others think about him."

You wondered if that's how Jungkook was rebelling - by getting a full sleeve and piercings. Bet it didn't go over well with his coach, especially the piercings on his eyebrow and lip.

"And who is the character that represents you the most?"

"Andrew."

It was the obvious choice. Jungkook is a wrestler, so it was easy to connect with him. You'd heard through the grapevine that he'd transferred in on a scholarship and was under the same pressure as Andrew. You can't imagine what Jungkook has been through.

"Are there times when you wish you weren't a wrestler?" You couldn't help but inquire. You could tell he was more than just a jock.

He pondered the question while softly drumming your mattress. "Both yes and no. I enjoy wrestling. I'm good at it, but I wish my father weren't an ass about it. When he brings it up with me, it takes the fun out of it, and I become stressed. That's probably why it's always easier to fuck and avoid talking about real life."

You guessed he was talking about Jieun and his previous relationships. "Is that why you can't make friends with me? Because you only fuck around?"

Jungkook chuckled. "We're not fucking around right now, are we? So I guess I'll say I'm doing a pretty good job of being your friend."

You had to give him that. He was sweet for doing everything you asked of him tonight. The whole night turned out to be a lot of fun.

"And what about you, huh? Who do you want to be, and who are you really?"

You answered this many times, and your answer has never changed. "I want to be Claire, but I'm Brian."

"You wanna be a princess?" Jungkook wouldn't have pegged you as a princess type, considering you didn't like that pet name.

"No, not necessarily. Sometimes I just want to be noticed—but not always. I don't want to be the center of attention all the time. But I'm not sure, and all I want is to be noticed." You weren't demanding that guys wait on you hand and foot, but it would be nice to be wanted once in a while.

Jungkook hummed, wavering over your answer. "It's not everything it's cracked up to be, you know? Being popular can be annoying at times."

You laughed. "Are you implying that you're popular?"

"Yeah, I'm so popular that I have to get a fake girlfriend just to keep all the girls away from me," he remarked sarcastically.

"By the way, why is that? You're just average looking, "You teased him by gently tossing a pillow at him.

Jungkook scoffed as he realized you were joking. "You can ask someone else to hold your hand next time." He threw the pillow back at you, but you were able to catch it in time.

"You should ask one of the hyenas outside your door the next time. I'm sure they'd want much more than just to be friends with you. "You huffed angrily and crossed your arms. He'll never give up the hand-holding, will he?

"Anyway, I'm glad you asked me to hold your hand, and I'm glad I asked you to be my pretend girlfriend. It's nice to have someone to talk to, you know? So I'm glad we've become friends," Jungkook said as his gaze softened.

"Don't tell me; you'll get all sappy on me now, Jungkook. We've had good banter with one another," you quipped back.

He chuckled softly as he shook his head. He wondered if this was how you downplayed when someone showed you kindness and compassion.

"So, I should probably get back to my dorm. It's getting late."

You quickly checked the time on your phone. It was nearly midnight, and even though you didn't have classes the next day, you needed every minute to study, so it was time to call it a night.

"Yeah, right, of course," you smiled. "I'm sure you have things to do and have to wake up early."

Jungkook crawled out of your bed, grabbed his backpack, and put on his shoes before heading to the door, and you followed closely. He stepped through the threshold and opened the door. Before continuing on his way, he turned around and waved goodbye.

You felt a minor ache in your heart as you watched him walk away after only a few hours together, and a part of you wished he could stay longer. You hoped he'd look back, but he didn't, so you went back into your room, remembering the fun night the two of you had.

He did take one more look, unnoticed by you, catching a glimpse of your bunny slippers returning to your room. He wished he could stay but didn't want to cross any boundaries as a friend.

The next day, bright and early, at eight o'clock, Jungkook closed the door to his car, holding a bag of chocolate croissants and a drink tray of hot coffee. Because of his rigorous wrestling training, he was used to getting up at dawn. Since the season had ended, his body had been waking up like clockwork. He thought he'd be a good friend/fake boyfriend and bring you something delectable to start your day.

When he knocked on your door, to his surprise, you didn't answer. "Namjoon-hyung?"

"Oh–hey, JK," he answered with a low, hoarse voice, holding the door ajar. "Are you looking for your girlfriend?"

Jungkook peered in to see Lyla snuggled under her duvet. "Yeah, I am, actually. She's not here?"

"Nah, man. She left early this morning and had to study or whatever."

Jungkook slung his backpack over his shoulder, careful not to spill the coffee or drop the croissants. "Did she mention where she was going?"

Lyla popped her bed head up, sleepily looking at Jungkook. "She's at the coffee shop, on the second floor by the window, tucked in a corner."

He thanked Lyla for her response before leaving the two lovebirds. He never imagined Namjoon and Lyla together in a million years. That's great for them, he thought, and everyone deserves to find someone with whom they can have fun.

It was still early on campus, and only those doing the walk of shame, hungover, or studying were awake. Jungkook noticed a few girls and one guy doing the walk of shame back to their rooms across campus. He chuckled slightly at the sight.

When he approached the coffeehouse and looked up through the glass window, he noticed you sitting alone, intensely writing, your eyes darting back and forth between your textbook and notebook. Being so fixated on studying, he found you endearing. He'd never met anyone so obsessed with school before.

He was about to take a step when he noticed someone stealing your attention. He didn't recognize the person, but he'd find out soon enough. Jungkook sped up his search for you and this mysterious man. He came to a halt as soon as you came into view; he'd never seen you so happy, giggly, and almost unrecognizable. The man who was drawing your attention was dressed in an oversized white tee, dark slacks, and sandals. His hands ran through his long dark locks while flashing a gummy smile, which you warmly returned.

You shifted your gaze away from Yoongi when you noticed Jungkook carrying a drink tray and a pastry bag. You knitted your eyebrows in confusion, "Jungkook? What are you doing here?"

Jungkook made his way over to you and this mysterious man. "Hey—just wanted to bring you some breakfast," he said, holding up a bag and a cup of coffee.

"Um, thank you. You didn't have to," you admitted with a shy smile, "Oh-Jungkook, this is Yoongi. Jungkook, Yoongi."

You had feelings for Min Yoongi, the philosophy TA before you had feelings for Jungkook. He was always willing to go out of his way to assist you in passing the class, and your crush lasted a long time before Jungkook stepped in.

The two men in front of you nodded and stood awkwardly, waiting for someone to break the silence.

"Um—Jungkook is my boyfriend," you muttered quickly, rubbing the back of your neck.

"Boyfriend, hmm? Good for you, sweetheart."

You shook your head at the pet name. "Don't you have better places to be, Yoongi?"

"I do, actually," he smiled, saluting you before leaving. "Later, sweetheart."

Jungkook sat across from you, setting down the pastry bag and drink tray. "Do you like him or something?" Jungkook asked casually, trying not to sound protective.

You chuckled. Was he jealous of Min Yoongi? "And if I did?"

Jungkook shrugged. "That's cool, I guess." He had no right to be jealous because you weren't dating. He didn't think you'd be into guys who looked like Yoongi, and he had no idea what kind of guys you liked besides him.

It was hard to suppress the smile trying to escape. "Are you jealous?"

He pointed to himself. "Pfft–Me? Jealous? Of what?" Jungkook was the top of his class, ranked first in the Western Wrestling Conference, and had a massive line of girls waiting for him. There was nothing to be jealous about.

"Yoongi's probably more interested in you than he is in me," you said simply, wavering your pen between your fingers.

He knitted his brows in confusion, then realized what you meant. "Oh…"

"It's cute that you're jealous."

"Am not."

You hummed mmhm, sending a smirk before returning to your studies.

"Didn't know if you ate yet, so I brought some pastries and coffee–even though it looks like you already had coffee," he said, pointing at the two empty mugs sitting on the window sill.

You may have overdone it with two lattes before eight o'clock. "I'm starving," you said, dropping your pen and grabbing the bag with your hands. When you opened it, you squealed with delight. The aroma of a fresh croissant filled your nostrils. "My favorite," you said as you bit into the flaky chocolate croissant.  "What are you doing here anyway?"

"I'm here to help you study."

He was adamant about this whole being friends thing, wasn't he? A small part of you wanted to be a smartass but decided against it.

"Oh–thanks," you mumbled indistinctly.

Jungkook turned his ear to you. "I'm sorry. I couldn't hear you. What did you say?" He teased, and he just wanted to hear you repeat it.

You sighed, annoyed with him. "I said thank you."

After a few hours, you were surprised to find Jungkook by your side, studiously helping you with no complaints or whining.

"Do you have a hair tie?" Jungkook asked as he kept combing his hand through his hair, but it kept falling back into his eyes.

You perked up after having your nose buried in your textbook for the previous hour. Your eyes wandered, wondering if you had an extra hair tie. Grabbing your bag, you shuffled for your beauty bag, pulling out a simple black hair tie.

"Here."

Jungkook held his hand out. He was just glad you had something, and he just needed his hair out of his face. His pitiful attempt to tie up his fringe was tragic, and you couldn't take it any longer.

You waved your hand, straining the chair from under you, and told him to give you the hair tie. "Come 'mere." He leaned his head towards you as you asked. You tied his hair into a little sprout quickly and easily, making him look adorable.

He straightened up and ran his palm against the small flower blooming on his head. Jungkook mumbled his gratitude before returning to his flashcards.

When you sat back down, you sighed. You'd already spent the entire morning and lunch studying, and your brain was hurting. You cast a glance at Jungkook as he continued to scribble. "Hey–let's go do something fun. I need a break."

Jungkook peered up, setting down his pen. "What do you have in mind?"

"Wanna try the world's biggest corn dog?"

"Okay, what the hell is this? And why is it so fucking big?"

You didn't take Jungkook to be one to complain about the food. You'd seen him eat some ridiculous things before. "There's a reason it's the world's largest corn dog!"

You'd been watching far too many TikToks when you came across this one, and it sounded too good to pass up, especially since it was in the same city as the two of you.

Jungkook insisted on sharing, and after five minutes of arguing, you finally caved. Your jaw dropped when your order number was called. Good thing Jungkook persuaded you to share. The corn dog was the size of your arm.

"Aren't you glad you didn't get your own?"

You sighed and rolled your eyes. "Don't eat it all!" You cried when he took the biggest bite and took another mouthful before finishing what was in his mouth. "Jungkook," you grumbled. You were anxiously awaiting that corn dog.

He laughed when you playfully smacked his back. Goddamn, was this man pure muscle or something? You bet your hand hurt more than the slap against his back.

Half of the corn dog was gone when he turned around to face you. "Oh, my god. You owe me another one!"

Jungkook was ridiculous, so you stepped on the back of his calf, causing him to plunge forward. "Yah–okay, okay," he chimed, finding his balance again. "You're so violent." He finally handed you the corn dog.

"Don't mess with a hangry woman," you chirped back, taking a bite of the crisp cornmeal batter and juicy sausage. You were never one to care for corn dogs, but this one was delicious.

California nights were among your favorites, particularly watching the sunset at the beach. When life became difficult, it became a place of refuge.

You made Jungkook get you a plate of nachos with space cheese instead of real cheese melted on top and a heaping spoonful of jalapenos. Jungkook remarked that he'd never seen a girl eat so much, but he was glad you didn't mind stuffing your face in front of him.

"I love food. We were put on this earth to enjoy food."

Jungkook laughed. He was relieved that you were comfortable being yourself around him, as most girls were not. He had the impression that they were always putting on a show because he was Jeon Jungkook.

After a short walk along the beach, chit-chatting here and there. You noticed an open bonfire pit and suggested doing this one last thing before the night ended. The night sky was too beautiful to miss out on stargazing.

You were both unprepared for the beach. With no chairs or blankets, you two made do with digging your toes into the sand.

The afternoon with Jungkook was nice; being away from school allowed you to get to know him better. He was like other young adults your age, trying his hardest.

You two started talking about your friends, and he inquired about you and Lyla. You were surprised to learn that Jimin was his best friend. You only knew Jieun and Jimin slept together, but you were unaware of Jungkook's role.

"I'm sorry they did that to you. It's a pretty shitty thing to do."

Jungkook shrugged. "It's whatever. It just sucks to lose a friend, you know?" He said as he made a pile of sand in front of him.

You agreed with a nod. "It's hard for me to open up to girls, so the ones that I am close with. I'm gonna be loyal to them for the rest of my life. So, I couldn't imagine if someone did something like that to me, and it would suck for sure."

He flashed a bunny smile and nose scrunch, trying to ease the pain of his past relationships. "So, tell me, what is a friend to you?"

He wanted to know what you were looking for in a friend because you only asked him to be a friend, and maybe if he was brave enough, he'd ask what you look for in a significant other.

You sat with your toes in the warm sand, the heat from the fire illuminating your skin. You two sat in silence, collecting your thoughts and thinking up a viable answer for Jungkook.

"A friend is—someone who listens, doesn't judge you, calls you out when you're out of line, and somehow makes everything okay," you shrugged. "I'm not sure. At least, that's what a friend is to me, and everyone's definition is different."

Jungkook acknowledged your response. "Seems simple enough. I can do that." He smiled, flashing his bunny teeth - his smile had always been one of your weaknesses, and him being so close, smelling his cotton body wash, was driving you insane.

He's never had too many friends that were girls because they always turned into more than friendship fairly quickly. He's had guy friends, but it was hard to open up to them sometimes. Namjoon was the only person he could ever truly confide in. So, he appreciated that the two of you were friends first. To be honest, it was just nice to sit and talk.

"You wanna go touch the water?"

"You just wanna do everything today, huh?"

"Yeah, kinda," you softly chuckled.

Jungkook stood up, brushing the sand off his bare feet and holding out his hand for you to take. You were about to slap it away but resisted and decided to play nice because he's been sweet to you today.

So you took his warm hand in yours, and he whirled you up from your seated position, forcing you to dash with him toward the water.

The waves crept up to your feet, foaming ocean water bubbles making their way to you. When you turned around, Jungkook had already pulled his hoodie over his head, followed by his shirt.

"What are you doing?" You exclaimed with wide eyes.

"Going in. You said you wanted to touch the water."

"No, no, no…touch it, like with my feet, not immerse my whole body in it." You had a feeling somehow, somehow, he would convince you to go in.

And there was Jungkook, half-naked and ready to jump. He looked at you and extended his hand. "We've come this far, and you're not going in? Let's go. We'll go together." His puppy eyes didn't help matters.

You dipped your toe in, and it wasn't too bad, but you knew you'd regret it once you got out. "Ugh–fine!" You grumbled, grabbing his hand.

"On the count of three. One…two…three–"

You two took a step forward together. Jungkook came to a halt as the two of you were about to hit the approaching wave, allowing you to freefall into the freezing salt water. When you realize what has just happened, your mouth drops open. You stood there with your mouth agape, your hair and clothes wet.

When you turned around, you yelled his name, which caused him to clap and laugh. "I'm going to kick you in the balls right now! C'mere!" You yelled at him while sprinting towards him. He swerved to avoid you before you caught his ankle with your foot, causing him to tumble and land on top of him.

You smacked him in the chest a few times, grumbling at his trickery. He clung to your waist, squeezing it until you relaxed. His eyes softened as he drew you closer to his chest, your breathing slowing after you whined and complained. Jungkook laughed when he saw you and wondered if you were always like this. He carefully tucked a strand of wet hair falling out of place behind your ear, observing every detail of your face.

"Sorry, I lied," he whispered, eyes darting back and forth between your eyes and mouth.

You rolled your eyes, then made your wet hair fall down, lightly dragging it across his face. "Now you're wet too," you uttered before pushing yourself off him.

Because your clothes were soaked, Jungkook offered you his hoodie as he slipped his shirt back on. You took it without hesitation. It was freezing after being soaked by the ocean water courtesy of Jungkook.

Jungkook escorted you to your dorm hall's lobby. You expected him to join you all the way to the door, but when you turned around, he remained a short distance away, so you decided to return to him.

If he walked you to the door, who knew what he would've done - staying out in the open was a safer option. Seeing you drowning in his hoodie didn't help his thoughts one bit.

"Thanks for today," you glanced at him, toying with the string on his hoodie.

He smiled as the corners of his mouth curved. "Anytime. Have a good night." The desire to lean in for a kiss was strong, so he quickly turned his feet and headed for the door, trying not to break your rules.

When you entered your room, you were greeted by Lyla, sitting on her bed, closing her book in her lap. "Hi, bestie. Where were you all day? Hmm?"

You bit your bottom lip hard, trying to stop the stupid smile from escaping. "Err–out with Jungkook."

She set her book on the desk beside her. "You're so in love with Jeon Jungkook," Lyla teased as she crawled under her covers.

"I–I am not," you huffed, "We had a fun time at the beach, that's all."

His scent lingered on your skin after you removed his hoodie. You needed to shower to get the salt off your skin, but you also wanted him to linger around for a little longer than needed. And that's when you realized you were in big trouble - just a few days with him, and you were falling for him. Fuck.

✨ next ~ part four

[noisytenant]

personal story, regarding my adoption. poignant? don't know how to describe/warn for this.

first: kind of worried this is tmi? not in the sense of making others uncomfortable, but. "is it wise to share this information online to a sizable audience?"

but, well, i'm probably going to talk about it in a more coherent form eventually (i actually started a zine but didnt continue it; it was 2020, you know the drill), and i don't think it poses much risk to just share.

anyways.

i was adopted from birth, and was aware of my adoption from the beginning. my birth mother was 17(?) when she had me. not hard to see why she wasn't keeping me. never got the sense that i was rejected or abandoned or whatever.

with this knowledge i never really had any problems with being adopted, and mostly thought it was really cool, and that i was lucky. if anything i probably had a chip on my shoulder about it, and this has made me an extremely normal person.

anyways, in the office closet, shoved far in the back corner on a high shelf, was a baby bag that i assumed had things from my childhood.

but it actually had plushes, a doll, and letters from my birth mother--from her to me, and also from her to my parents--that i was unaware of and had never accessed. so it sat untouched for 20 years, i guess. to be fair, i never really asked about my birth mother at all, but... man, bit late for that, isn't it? but better late than never.

anyways, i'm rereading the letters now. some darkly(?) funny parts:

"...I know you guys [my parents] are everything you said you would be, and probably more." The "probably" is really fucking funny to me

She mentions that they (collectively) didn't negotiate how much contact they planned to have after the birth and adoption, which I think is really funny and typical of my parents. She was thankful about it, but whatever amount of pictures and letters my parents sent (I get the sense not many--maybe 3? 4?) was evidently not ideal. Really, what a situation to be in. When DO you cut the cord there?

She attached some printouts of "special emotional needs" for adoptees. The very first: "I need parents who are skillful at meeting their own emotional needs so that I can grow up with healthy role models and be free to focus on my development". Lol. LMAO.

Another: "I may appear more whole than I actually am. I need your help to uncover the parts of myself that I keep hidden, so I can integrate all the elements of my identity." Oh buddy... MISSION FAILED!

some observations and more poignant parts:

It's really weird to think that she was younger than me when she wrote these.

I think there is a photo of her and the father, but I'm not sure if we were certain about him. She was seemingly going steady with him since they got engaged after I was born, and I do have similar eyebrows (for the record, one of my best features). But the resemblance is challenging to discern. Neither of them seem to have as prominent a nose as mine, that's an index original.

She was evidently into scrapbooking/stationery; several of the cards are handmade. Thick cardstock, fancy hole punches, embossing powder and delicate stickers. It's easy to imagine the process of them being made. You can kind of feel the love coming off them, or whatever.

She mentioned struggling to write a letter for me. It's somewhat reassuring because I also struggle to write letters for people. In the end I think the pictures and craftsmanship did much of the speaking for her. The letter is three sentences long.

In the "special emotional needs" pages, one also says, "I suffered a profound loss before I was adopted." I get frustrated when people assert adoption trauma at me without considering my circumstances. I dislike the sentiment that blood relations are less traumatic when I think that the family structure itself is traumatic. But I do have this strong sense that I was born into grief, and reading some of these pages (and sidestepping the multiple Christian-specific ones, damn you) provided some interesting reflection on that.

She apparently made a scrapbook for me, presumably including the pictures she received from my parents. I am quite curious about their letters. I guess if I reach out I could see, but it's difficult to know what to say. ...And I'm transgender.

lastly:

there's a photo of her the day after she had me, standing outside and smiling. she has what appears to be a cigarette in her hand. This is, I like to believe, the source of all the problems in my life.

[hollywoodsargeant]

Hello again, UK reader here

I'm sorry but A RED CARPET FOR PROM?????

When I had my Y11 prom (which i guess is kinda like junior prom) we had on some boat on a river and there was like no food/drink or anything and it was kind of crap but the boat was cool. But the senior prom is just on our school hall which is kinda old and falling apart and it just makes me realise how different American school is.

Like I know it was different already but on this scale it's just so insane everything you guys do is just so much bigger. The football (im still tripping balls on how big of a deal that is, if you were to wear something with your bf's name on it you'd get bullied immediately) and the prom is just so so mad to me.

Screaming because a new chapter of course i would scream but now i am living in nervous fear of chapter 12 after what was said. Incredible once again!! 🩵💙

YEAH. i know for a fact not every school does that and my high school was weird for it but it amused me at the time and it amuses me now so i figured oscar and logan's high school would do it too... i've talked to my friends about it and yeah none of their high schools did that. but it was very much like. you had to walk that red carpet to get into the venue (maybe if you were late you would've skipped it idk) and it was the most horrible system to get that fucking index card with your name on it bc it was literally three people standing around a parking lot with different sectionf of the alphabet but that's like. a fuck ton of cards. and you'd stand there and wait for them to pick through and find yours while they're also looking for 12 other people's IT WAS A LOT but it's part of the experience methinks

my prom was in like a. i actually don't know what it is. i think it is just an event venue. but somebody's dad owned it so the school would host prom there every year they still do it there... but a lot of my friends were like. oh we had prom at our school. like on the football field or in the gym. but mine was off and there was a dramatic red carpet and it was. well. dramatic

but yeah american high school sure is a thing. if i'm not mistaken? i think we make a bigger deal out of high school graduation too? like oh. that's actually why i'm scared of chapter 12 lol nothing bad really happens there's just a lot i want to put in it so i fear how long it's going to end up being... sure i could split it into two chapters but as seen with the length of chapter 9 i am stubborn and i refuse. so i will just continue to be afraid of it

in the meantime though. chapter 11. i alr have some scenes written for it so we're starting strong

[running-in-the-dark]

I had a bunch of errands to run today, and absolutely nothing went right lol

it rained so hard almost the entire time, so I was soaked like 30 seconds after leaving the car for the first time - when I left, it wasn't raining that hard so I figured a hoodie would be enough. it wasn't. I later noticed that there was an umbrella in the trunk, but by that time it was too late lol

the most important thing was picking up my prescriptions from two different doctors. when I got to the first one, the sign said they closed two hours earlier. I went in and up the two stories to the office anyway because I figured I'm already here, and at least it's dry inside, so might as well check. and they were actually still open! so that was good. that was the only thing that went well, haha

then I got to the other doctor's office. it's not actually my doctor - that one is on holiday, so I had to get my prescription at this other place. I've never been there before. the sign said they'd close about 10 minutes after I got there. but they were already closed. I rang the doorbell, I called the number on the sign, just in case someone was still there. nope, nothing. awesome! that was the important prescription! I couldn't make it any other day this week so it's my own fault that it was this late, but now I only have enough Colestyramine until Saturday. if I can get the prescription on Monday, I'll probably get the medication on Tuesday. that sucks. but it'll (have to) be fine, I guess. ugh.

everything after that went wrong too. I had an embarrassing interaction at the bubble tea store (with a guy that I guess I have a bit of a crush on maybe? so it's kinda embarrassing every time. but it was worse this time because I've been there like 20 times already but I misread the sign anyway and felt soo stupid, then blamed it on my glasses being wet from the rain, and he offered me napkins to clean them and I said that'd probably just make it worse haha and then I wanted to die :) )

it stopped raining a few times, but every time I left a building it had gotten even worse than before. I didn't find most of the things I wanted to buy. I had to wait five minutes at the gas station because the guy in front of me just did not come back, and there was a lorry/truck behind me so I couldn't do anything about it. I stepped into a puddle and I was wearing sandals because I thought it wouldn't rain too much. paying with my phone didn't work in exactly one of the stores I went to, but I had gotten too confident that it would work everywhere, so I had left my wallet in the car and had to run there in the rain to get it.

I had promised my mother I would drop something off (and I really wanted to get rid of it because it has been in the way since we moved here and it made me mad every time I saw it), so I had to go there, but my clothes were completely soaked so I was cold and annoyed, and I forgot to eat so I was super hungry and just wanted to go home. it took two hours because she wouldn't stop talking.

I did get a couple 40 year old wooden index card boxes from her basement though! she didn't even remember she had them. I saw them a few times like 10-20 years ago and I guess this is the kind of information my brain thinks it should keep 🤷 and I saw some fabric that she wanted to get rid of, so now I've got that to practice sewing on! and some empty glass jars that were the exact size and shape I've been looking for. so I guess it was worth it in the end! still very annoying though.

oh!! I mentioned the other day that her cat had probably been killed by an animal. well. she turned up a day later! she had hidden between the shed and a bush, so they couldn't find her. she's okay! just a few scratches and missing bits of fur, but nothing deep. she's doing pretty well considering (the vet said she's more affected than a healthy cat would be because she has ataxia, which is also why it's incredible that she was able to get away!)

the good thing is that my mother has said she won't let her outside on her own anymore. she still lets her other (healthy) cat out, but she's old and stays in the backyard too.

the vet also said it was probably a raccoon that attacked the cat. apparently they've been getting pretty aggressive here lately. and the neighbour has had raccoons in her attic a bunch of times, so it seems pretty likely.

[beardedmrbean]

it's 12:57a and my video is made and uploaded to youtube. this one only took about 3½ hours to make between writing the lyrics/translation, notating time for pictures and lyrics, and getting programmed into windows movie maker. it would've been quicker but i stopped to eat, rewatch the latest episode of Futurama, and have a pot cookie and some mochi, lol. the copyright scanner said the band allows their music to be used so it should stay up. I got the lyrics and translations off of official sources and the band's official video shows who is singing, but i'm still gonna pass this along to the boys in the band to make sure i got everything right. but you should be able to tell who's singing with the visual better.

sorry i babbled on. cards on the table i'm REALLY high right now.

since i'm on my computer and desktop tumblr doesn't like youtube links, i'll just be posting the end part

/watch?v=Uqxj_6uU2yg&list=PLtlbcf4FnMyj1lxfHKTdjS5HldG1_rRSO&index=94&ab_channel=KyotoTig

This came out nice, good job on it.

I'd go nuts trying to put one together

[themetaphorgirl]

Okay idea: everyone is super stressed out, probably school related (idk how american school works but when I was at school everyone got stressed during exam season) and Spencer keeps info dumping on everyone as a way to not feel as stressed out but it’s having the opposite effect on everyone else and they get super snappy and telling him to go away or to be quiet and he ends up just going super quiet for the rest of the day/ study session. Aaron twigs onto what happened so when he’s putting Spencer to bed that night he asks him about his facts and he thrives telling them until he falls asleep mid-fact!!

Idk this has been on my brain all day lol 💙

Okay so this took a tiny bit of a turn but it made me laugh soooo…I hope you like it!

—————

The library was eerily quiet. Spencer fidgeted as he flipped through his history textbook. He wasn’t exactly sure how to study like everyone else- no one had every taught him how to study, so he just kept reading and tucking things away in the back of his memory.

The door slammed and he sat up a little too fast, smacking the back of his head against the wall. “Ow,” he whispered to himself, trying to not disturb the other students cramming frantically for exams. He pushed himself up and tugged down the hem of his half-tucked uniform shirt. Everyone seemed to want to study on their own, but his quiet corner in the middle of the 900s was just way too quiet.

He tiptoed down the aisles in search of someone familiar. Penelope was sitting on the floor surrounded by stacks of color coded index cards, frowning at them in confusion as she absentmindedly tapped her fluffy-topped pen against her cheek. “Hi, Pen,” he said. “Are you still studying?”

“Mm-hm,” she said without looking up.

He shifted his weight. “I like your index cards,” he offered. “Did you know they use color coding in food safety to prevent cross contamination?” He pointed to a neon green stack. “Green means processed meat. And blue means-“

“Precious, I know you really want to share things with me, but I have a lot of information to weed through,” she said. “Could you please go share your wealth of knowledge with somebody else?”

He hesitated. “Okay,” he said.

She went back to her index cards immediately. He wandered away, looking for someone else familiar. He found Derek sitting on a windowseat and JJ lying on the floor next to him, their review packets in wild disarray and the contents of their backpacks strewn around them. “What are you guys studying?” Spencer asked.

“Math,” JJ said glumly. “And Derek is making his study card for English.”

Derek held it up. “We’re allowed a three by five index card,” he said. “Think I can write smaller?”

Spencer brightened. “I can’t help with the writing, but I can help with math!” he said. “What is it? Algebra? Calculus?”

“It’s all the dumb y=mx+b stuff,” JJ said.

Spencer sat down beside her. “I can help!” he said. “I like linear equations. They’re so easy once you know what you’re looking at. So the y-intercept is-“

“I think I can figure it out,” JJ said. “Thanks, though.”

“You’re sure?” Spencer said. “Derek, do you-“

“Dammit,” Derek said, distracted as the lead of his pencil snapped. “Ugh, I’m running out of lead.”

Spencer stood up carefully. “Okay, well…I’ll help if you need me,” he offered.

He stood there for a moment, waiting to see if they were going to change their minds, but they both went back to their work. Reluctantly he bit back a sigh and kept walking.

He could hear Emily and Aaron arguing before he got to them. “You realize that these are the grades that prospective colleges are going to look at for admission, right?” he was saying.

“Cs get degrees, Hotchner. I don’t really care.”

The two of them sat opposite each other at a long table; Aaron’s work was stacked in neat piles while Emily’s books formed a tower topped by a damp cup of mostly melted iced coffee. Aaron dragged his hand through his dark hair in bewildered frustration, leaving it tousled and sticking up. “You could pull your grade up to at least a B if you just tried,” he said. “I’m trying to help you.”

Emily tossed a handful of skittles in her mouth. “Relax, Hotchner, I’ll be fine,” she said.

Spencer cleared his throat. “Actually-“

Emily jumped, spilling skittles across the table. “Jesus Christ, gremlin, when did you get here?” she said.

He rolled his eyes. “Actually, it’s been proven that standardized testing like the SAT and the ACT are more important for college admission than grades,” he said.

Emily smirked. “Aha, see? I told you,” she said, tossing a skittle at Aaron’s face. It bounced off his forehead and onto his open physics textbook as he glared at her in annoyance.

“Although a study of fifty-five thousand students did show that GPA scores are five times more reliable for predicting graduation rates than the ACT, so you might be more likely to get accepted to a college than graduate on time,” he continued. “And a student with a high GPA but a low test score can-“

“Spencer,” Aaron interrupted. “Do you need something?”

He hesitated. “I’m hungry?” he said meekly.

Emily held up the skittles. “Want these?” she offered. He shook his head. “Suit yourself.”

“We already had dinner, Bug,” Aaron said. “If you’re really that hungry I have some snacks in my room later.”

“Could we go get coffee?” he asked.

“It’s almost nine, that’s way too late,” Aaron said. “Go study, Spencer. We’ll head back in like half an hour.”

He rocked up on his toes. “Can I stay with you guys?” he asked.

“Only if you can be quiet,” Aaron said.

Spencer slunk away and trooped over to the circulation desk. “Alex, can I have a snack?” he asked plaintively.

“Wait, there’s snacks in here?“

Spencer balked. “Where’s Alex?”

Instead of Alex, Anderson was sitting behind the desk with his iPad in one hand and an Italian dictionary in the other. “She asked me to take her shift tonight,” he said. “Rewind, munchkin, were you saying your sister keeps snacks in the library? Where? I’m starving.”

Spencer ran back towards Aaron and Emily, nearly tripping over his untied shoelaces. “I thought Alex was coming with us,” he said.

“Nah, she and Blake wanted some alone time so they could-“

Aaron threw a wadded up piece of paper at Emily’s face. “They’re studying,” he said quickly. “By themselves. Alone. We’re not going to bother them. And Emily and I are studying. You should go see if JJ or Penelope need help.”

“They don’t,” Spencer said glumly.

“Derek?”

“He’s busy too.”

“Dave?”

Emily shook her head. “He left for home after dinner,” she said.

“Are James and Alex coming back?” Spencer asked.

“Not any time soon,” Emily smirked. “They’re busy.”

“Doing what?” Spencer pressed.

Aaron groaned, dragging his hand over his face. “Just go study quietly by yourself, okay?” he said. “We’ll leave the library soon, just…please stop asking questions.”

Spencer’s shoulders drooped. “Okay,” he said in a small voice.

He wandered back to the 900s and sat down by himself. Studying seemed boring and pointless, but he really wasn’t in the mood to read anything either.

—————

Aaron bit back a yawn. They’d meant to leave the library some time after nine, but it was well past ten already. He shouldered his backpack as they made the walk across campus. JJ and Penelope were quizzing each other on vocabulary words and Derek was playing on his phone but Spencer trailed behind him, unusually quiet.

“Kid, you doing okay?” he asked. “Need me to carry you?”

“I’m fine,” Spencer said in a small voice.

He could tell something was wrong with Spencer, but it didn’t click until they were almost up to the seventh floor. Of course Spencer was sad and grumpy- everyone had been telling him to go away and stay quiet and stop bothering them, of course he would be upset.

“Bug, are you still hungry?” Aaron asked as they climbed the last flight of stairs. “I’ve got some snacks in my room if you want them. Get your pajamas on and come over if you want them.”

Spencer didn’t answer and he half expected him to not show up, but after about ten minutes he heard a small knock at his door.

“Hi,” Spencer said in a small voice.

Aaron ushered him inside. “Hey, kiddo,” he said. “I still have some of those frosted animal cookies if you want them.” Spencer nodded. “Go get comfy then. Just don’t get crumbs in my bed.”

Spencer climbed up on his bed, his favorite blanket trailing around him, and accepted the bag Aaron handed him. “So do you feel ready for your exams?” Aaron asked.

“I think so,” Spencer said as he nibbled on a cookie.

Aaron cleared his throat. “So is it true that testing scores can be more important than a GPA?” he said. “Can you explain that for me?”

He let Spencer explain, quiet and a little terse at first, but as he warmed up he started to talk faster, words spilling out as he jumped from one topic to the next. Aaron let him talk, smiling and nodding and adding what he could when he paused to take a breath. He seemed happier, more animated and less reluctant to talk.

Eventually Spencer’s words began to slow as his eyes started to close. Aaron watched him carefully as he started to get sleepy, catching the bag of cookies before it could spill the contents.

Spencer yawned heavily and didn’t put up a fight as Aaron drew the covers back. “-and then they found out that…that baboons and mandrills aren’t actually that alike…they’re in a different genus,” he said sleepily. He laid down on Aaron’s bed and allowed himself to be tucked in. “That was in…in 1989, I think.”

“Wow, that’s interesting,” Aaron said, keeping his voice low. He tucked Spencer in securely and draped his blanket over him. “You want rain sounds or waves?”

“Both, please,” Spencer mumbled, cuddling under the covers as Aaron turned on the white noise app on his phone. “Bubba?”

“Yes?”

“Where’s Birdy?”

Aaron hesitated. “She and James are…uh…”

Luckily Spencer yawned hard and closed his eyes, cuddling into the pillow before he could say anything. Aaron waited until he was asleep enough to let out a tiny baby snore.

“Oh thank god, I don’t want to answer that,” Aaron mumbled. He bent to kiss Spencer’s forehead. “Get some sleep, bug.”

[whipplefilter]

this is a cliff daniels appreciation post

Man, I’ve said this before, but I really like Cliff Daniels as a crew chief. He has such a brain for the long game and he has pulled off some of the smartest recoveries in my memory--both in terms of being able to take big effective swings at an initially poor setup and in terms of putting an injured car in positions for finishes it really has no right to be in--including in victory lane.

The way he races is such a satisfying combination of measured, solid strategy and incredible daring. Sure, every time they have a Tire Strategy, risk-averse me is just like “well, don’t like that!!” but that’s why I’ll never crew chief a championship-winning Cup team. 😂 It’s only gone incredibly poorly that one time when it went so poorly not a single analyst could figure out what possessed them to do that. But like, this Pocono race was such a good example of that, even if Villain Denny cannot be accounted for LOL. That one Coke 600 win where they were *on fire* at one point, among other things, and still ended up winning. That playoffs race with the alternator swap!!

And I think he’s a good match for Kyle Larson’s personality, too. Larson comes across to me as someone does well with more coaching than less, and no one gives an inspo speech like Cliff Daniels. And I get the impression that Cliff is more than happy to share like, his color coded index cards and a powerpoint and hyperlinked reference pages, which works great when your driver is open to taking that level of direction.

[demonicintegrity]

2. Coffee or tea?

5. How many houseplants do you have?

6. Favorite flower?

17. A book you're currently reading

21. What color would you like to dye your hair?

24. How was your day today?

30. How do you feel about this weekend?

2. Coffee! I dont like tea lol

5. None to my name. Here at my family's house theres a handful around in various stages of actually alive. I wanna have plants of my own. Probably next time when I go to college

6. Hmm... Hibiscus! But I also like black eyed susans and have a soft spot for any roses.

17. I just finished The Many Deaths of Laila Starr it was so good. Next up is It's Lonely At The Centre Of The Earth by Zoe Thorogood. I'm excited to start it soon.

21. PURPLE. My hair needs to be purple again. I miss having dyed hair. Desperately need a haircut atm.

24. It was fine. Summer days blend together for me and that makes things eh. Towards the end now I'm getting in a mood again but it's chill. Trying to work on some index card crayon attacks to post in the morning rn.

30. It was fine. Like I said, things are kinda eh. I worked yesterday which was cool. But summer tends to be the time where because I stall my mind gets prone to havin fits. Haven't been sleeping well lately either. But again, it's chill.

[hekatiane]

hey! i’m just now getting into star guardian and i saw your (very helpful and well-made btw tysm) timeline but i’m very confused as to how most of the information got out there. i’m trying to catch up on everything but i- i think i did? like i don’t know how or when some of the events described were presented. i’m sorry if this sounds convoluted 😅

Glad to know my timeline was helpful, and don't worry, allow me to explain! All the information was taken from multiple official sources: The written stories (Starfall, The Slumber Party, The Twilight Star, and Twin Stars [this last one has an index on the right, it's easy to miss so look closely!]), the character's biographies, the Wild Rift comic called Star-Crossed, the visual novel on Wild Rift, some LoR cards and the visual novel on LoL PC. This last one has also a bond section that most people missed out , which is personal stories about the each member of Kai'Sa's team (sadly you'll need to look for these individually). I mention these since for example, Nilah's bond story tells us that Zoe is a Pretender Star and explains what these beings are, but it's not said anywhere else so many don't know about it. Since this VN was part of an event everything is now gone (like the WR one), but I provided you links to both VNs (and more) at the beginning in case you want to check those out! Due to all the lore being split throughout so many places, it's normal to miss things (like Gwen being freed is shown only on her LoR card) But in order to create this timeline I made sure to search for and read every published source! Hope this answer has clarified your doubts 😊

[trinidaddy888]

You Wanna Smoke? (Chapter 5)

Chase runs out of weed and must go to the human world to get more. How will they manage? And who will they be smoking weed with? Find out in this self-indulgent fic about my Obey Me blunt rotation.

Characters: MC, Mammon, Lucifer, Thirteen, Diavolo, Asmodeus, Simeon, Beelzebub, Solomon

Genre: Slice of Life

Tags: Marijuana, Recreational Drug use, No romance just bros being bros, No Spoilers

A/n: I had a blunt rotation list for Obey Me characters that I’d like to smoke weed with and I decided to make it into a story. The full story is already posted to AO3 but I wanted to keep a writing tumblr for all my stories. The previous chapters had art but I got lazy from this point on and stopped drawing lol.

Story Index

“Um,” I said trying to find an explanation that didn’t sound like bullshit, “When we say weed, we mean this species of herbaceous plant that can counteract the plague of…”

Diavolo chuckled and waved me over, “It’s okay, Chase. I know you are talking about marijuana. It’s okay!”

“Thirteen,” Mammon said with a growl, “Why? Why would you ask Diavolo? Out of all the people to ask?!”

“We all know that there are few people who can make it to the human world easily,” she said with crossed arms, “And besides, I sell weed to Diavolo.”

My mouth fell open. Diavolo? Weed?

“But you don’t smell like weed,” I blurted out.

“Edibles,” he replied with a shrug, “Barbatos throws some Hell Cannabutter I give him to put in his pastries. To this day, he still doesn’t know he’s been making edibles for me.”

Shit, Barbatos’s edibles must be so tasty. I was jealous.

Honestly, in retrospect, he was one of the chillest demons I knew. I thought he was just that way because he lived a privileged life from being the Prince of Devildom.

“Well,” I said, taking a seat next to Diavolo, “What is the plan?”

“Lord Diavolo,” Mammon cut in, “Does Lucifer know?!”

“Lucifer? Oh. No, I would never tell him,” he said smiling, “I think he’d have a heart attack.”

Mammon took a seat next to Thirteen and reclined.

“Okay,” Mammon said, finally, “Lord Diavolo consumes weed. I guess I just don’t know who’s a stoner anymore.”

Thirteen clapped to get our attention.

“So,” she said, “How are we doing this?”

Diavolo shepherded us to the human world on a Saturday morning. We managed to sneak out of Devildom by keeping Lucifer busy with paperwork. Barbatos was given a day off and never questioned Diavolo’s deviation from his duties. Luckily, Barb was loyal to a fault. We were clear.

We decided to rent a car to drive to the dispensary from the portal.

“Should we get human world food before or after we get weed?” Diavolo asked as we pulled up to a stop sign.

“After,” I said. “Mammon did you send Beel to Hell’s Kitchen so he wouldn’t find out we’re bringing human world food back?”

“Yeah,” he said with a sigh, “I gave him my credit card. What’s a few more charges and added debt?”

I felt bad asking him to do that but we needed to make sure that we would not be interrupted when we got back. We didn’t have to worry about most of the brothers barging into Mammon’s room but Beel would be looking for us the second he caught a whiff of human food and Lucifer is always checking on Mammon to make sure he’s behaving.

“Do you guys have your fake human world IDs?” I asked

They pulled them out to show me. I was impressed. I was not sure how they managed, but I assumed that thousands of years going back and forth between the human world and Devildom gave them the edge in obtaining any documents they needed to pass as human.

We pulled up to a dispensary in a town that was far from any place where anyone would know me but stocked with enough product to give us what we would need. Its website had a variety of strains in edibles, flower, carts, dabs— even some products even I never knew of. We stepped inside and were greeted by an employee.

“Welcome to Emanate Herbals!” exclaimed an employee, “What can I help you with, today?”

“Well,” I said, taking off my sunglasses and pocketing them, “We are going to need weed and a lot of it.

[sissytobitch10seconds]

Nerds

Fandom: Grey's Anatomy Summary: Bailey and Derek walk in on the residents doing something strange. Warnings: Mentions of trauma Word Count: 1,436 Ship(s): Meredith Grey & Alex Karev & Cristina Yang & April Kepner & Jackson Avery & Miranda Bailey & Derek Shepherd

Archive link!

A/N: I wrote this right after I finished a campaign and it was the first campaign that I ever finished which is why I wanted to write this so badly. I wrote it a long time ago, before I created the drabble collection series that I have now so I'm posting it later but that doesn't mean it's edited or anything lol. I hope that you all enjoy it! Stay sissy and bitchy everyone <3

"You walk down a hallway that stretches as far as any of you can see with the limited light from your torches and Cristina's lantern. The ceiling isn't in sight either," Lexie explained as she picked up the red dry erase marker and drew a vague circle around the area she was talking about. "Eventually you find a big room that has a door for each of you with your name and likeness on it."

"No, this is obviously a trap, Cristina pursed her lips and shook her head. "We shouldn't go in."

Meredith picked up her twenty sided dice in between her forefinger and thumb before dropping it back down onto the map that they were all sitting around. "I think we should try to walk to the other side of the room."

"Do you do that?" Lexie asked as she looked up from the papers she was hiding behind her DM screen. When Meredith nodded she continued, "Every time one of you turns in a certain direction the door appears three feet in front of you that way. When you walk up to the door and try to step around it that way it resets to three feet directly in front of you."

"Shit, we're going to have to go through them and that's bad. We shouldn't split up the party," Jackson mumbled into his hand.

"Well we don't really have any other options," Alex snarked back at the other man.

April looked up from where she had been staring at the collection of miniatures sitting on top of the shiny map. "Is this going to result in a TPK?"

A devious smile formed over her face. "Enter the doors and find out!"

"That's a shitty answer and you're a shitty person," Alex snarked. He picked up his character and moved it one square in front of where it had been before. "I go inside the door."

"Me too," Cristina said. 

Meredith swore as she grabbed her pager and saw that someone was calling her to go into the OR. "I have to go. I go into the door too, so you guys can keep playing with me until I get back and we're all together again. I know that you did this so that we can play more with less people," she glanced at her sister, who just flushed a bit. "Now I have to go scrub in with Callie."

"Good luck!" they all called after her. The aforementioned attending had been a little difficult to work with lately because she had just come back from medical and maternity leave. Meredith rolled her eyes at them a little bit as she slipped out of the on-call room that they were hiding out in and went to go do her job.

Lexie turned back to the rest of her party. "Alright, so you all go through your doors?" Once she had gotten a nod from each of the other residents she continued. "Roll for initiative order. If you get paged or have to go home because you've already worked eighty hours we'll just take you out."

"We know the drill, Lexie," Jackson chuckled as he picked up his twenty sided die and rolled.

The other doctor just smiled as she picked up the cards with their names. She got all of their numbers and then ordered the little name tags, which were really messy handwriting on index cards according to what they had rolled. She then picked up all of the miniatures and erased the map that had before. She split the board into even pieces for each of the players. She sat the miniatures down in the corresponding squares closest to each of the players they went to. "Alright, Alex, when you enter through your door you see a very very tall tree. It's about thirty feet away from you but it seems like there is something in the branches. Everything else around you is flat with grass that comes up to about your waist. There's no wind, and there are no clouds in the sky." As she spoke she pulled out a little tree from the box of miniatures under the bed next to her.

"Ugh, this sucks," Alex muttered. "I walk to the tree to inspect it, but I'm going to keep an eye out for everything else."

"Alright, roll-"

Before she got the chance to say anything else, the door to the on-call room burst open. 

April shrieked and began to scramble to clean everything up as quickly as possible. Lexie jumped and knocked over the DM screen to reveal all of the papers, which scattered forward and knocked over the miniatures that she had just finished setting up. Cristina calmly pulled her pager slightly off of her pants so that she could read any messages that she might have had, but there were none. Alex swore and then rubbed his forehead with his hands as if he was trying to hide himself. Jackson laughed at Lexie and April, though he began to pack up the dice back into the velvety bag they were kept in between sessions.

"What on Earth are you all doing in here?" Bailey asked, placing her hands on her hips as she looked them over. Derek had been walking by with a chart in his hand, and he stalled to look over her shoulder to see what she was yelling at someone for, and who. 

"We, um, we were just playing D&D," Lexie explained as she began to gather up her papers and shove them messily into the binder that she kept for this campaign.

"Why are you doing this in the hospital, and in an on call room at that?" she demanded.

April shoved her dice back into the bag, before she shoved them and her miniature into the small part of the box that was supposed to be for her equipment. She then shoved her character sheet into the binder that she took from Lexie's hands. She scurried out of the room and returned to the charts that she had been putting off until after her surgery in an hour or so. 

"No one ever uses this on-call room because there's too much foot traffic outside since it's so close to the OR," Cristina replied as she continued to calmly pack up her own items.

"Did you need this room for something, Dr. Bailey?" Jackson asked.

"Not anymore! I was going to use it for a quiet place to get some work done but you have this nerd game taking up all the room to do so," she threw her arms up in the air in exasperation.

"You can't call us nerds when you've watched all of the Star Wars films and read a bunch of the books too," Alex snorted as he tossed his bag of dice to Lexie. 

Bailey shot him a look and then walked down the hall while muttering to herself about how stupid the residents were and how she couldn't have been like that when was their age. Derek stayed there, moving into the doorway so that he could watch them clean up. "So does Meredith play?"

Lexie nodded. "She was the person to persuade Cristina to play, and kind of got the whole thing up and running when I pitched the idea to her," she began to roll up the map as tight as possible so they could hide it away like they always did.

"She never mentioned it to me," the attending scoffed a little. 

"Well we didn't want anyone to laugh at us so we never talked about it. I mean, it's like we're teenagers. What adults play D&D?" Cristina muttered as she stood up and pushed past the man that was basically her brother-in-law.

"If Yang's leaving then I am too," Alex said as he quickly followed after the other resident to go find somewhere to sleep since he was actually on-call that night.

Lexie let out a nervous giggle as she finished packing everything up and shoved it under the bed. "It's actually used in a lot of team building exercises," she explained. "And I just thought that it would be something fun to kill the time."

"No, I understand," Derek shrugged. "I played D&D in the club all throughout high school. I stopped in college because I didn't have enough free time. But, uh, I won't tell anyone what I saw here if you let me play."

Lexie opened her mouth and glanced at Jackson, who gave her a small nod. She then turned back to her brother-in-law. "Deal."

[scarefox]

Hi! Have you seen this? Lizzo singing Du Hast Mich wasn't on my bingo card, but here we are lol, and my first thought was to send it to you since you posted that video about them yesterday.

I've been meaning to ask you, and sorry if it sound silly, but how well known is Rammstein in Germany? Like are they played on the radio, do a lot of people talk about them, are they generally liked or considered "those weird dudes" or are they just like every other band? Thank you for you time if you decide to answer this, and have a lovely evening^^

lol, thanks for thinking of me :D I don't know Lizzo but that's awesome and funny!

Yea, Rammstein are quiet popular in Germany but more so for them being controversial and some people hate them, thinking they are right wing (they are left wing but some people love to ignore that for woke points and clickbait 🙄 don't know how many anti-right songs and liberal statements they should do till it clicks). Because of that, they don't get played on ordinary mainstream radio stations but on some music channels on TV (depending on how provocative the music videos are) and probably on special rock themed radio stations. Some videos are age restricted (especially Tills solo stuff.. don't know if you know but there are some only uncensored on P*rnHub lol) and one CD got indexed because of the song "Ich tu dir weh". Means it's iIIegal to sell, perform uncensored or published. They thought it was "glorifying violence against women". Tho the song is about BDSM if I am not wrong. Even my media ethics prof, who's a lawyer who's helping indexing dangerous songs, said that their lyrics are art and art can't be indexed. The song got set free after 2 years and then they even won an award for the music video 😅

Anyways, they are mainly listened by rock, goth and metal folks and some normies like them too. From edgy teenager to hardcore fans and even old people as well. I have a granny at work who loves them. It's basically the standard metal band besides the other standard german rock band "böhse onkelz" (they are as controversial as Rammstein.... lol). Might be also because they sing in german and a lot of germans (shockingly) don't speak english well. Probably comparable to the popularity of Marilyn Manson in the US.

[sharkface-daydreams]

i ask YOU of wash then

*shocked pikachu face*

Lmao honestly I do not think of him so much? Some other facet of me used to a lot I think. Our thoughts of Wash are all hand-written index cards in an unorganized deck wrapped with a rubber band. I will have to file through them to figure out where we stand lol

First impression: Let’s see. First meeting of Wash was season 6, disgruntled and determined to get what he wants. Good for him honestly. Love morally grey grumpy bastards with hidden agendas. <- this was also very long ago and memories are bad. may be an approximation lol

Impression now: There are so many Washes. I still think Re: Wash was my favorite. Or at least this facet’s favorite. I do like Wash’s friend caring side but if it’s too prominent. I get a little bored, I think. That’s not all there is to him.

Favorite moment: Wash parole revenge arc. Snark 2: Electric Boogaloo. “What makes you think I’m going to ask for it?” My man’s had ENOUGH. Love that for him. Honestly just the whole of him through season 8. Wish we’d had more time with Meta and Wash and Doc though. Rude comedy trio of the century.

Idea for a story: Haha, ideas for stories, that’s sil– *thousands of index cards fall out of my pockets and bury me. How did they all fit in there. Am i dead crushed beneath the weight of wip ideas. Who knows.

Seriously though, I don’t have much that’s Wash centric except for the fluffy locington au… but he does feature heavily in the Yurch AU Re:Seasons arc and gets to you know talk to Epsilon (and Alpha bc everyone lives) and work some things out.

Unpopular opinion: I genuinely can’t tell you what’s unpopular about him. And I think part of this is just. Canon has so many versions of him. I think you said it to me before, you can basically pick whatever Wash you want lmfao.

Favorite relationship: OH i was only thinking about friendships here a minute but like. Tucker, Caboose, Lina and I treasure the little bits of his friendship with Connie and the triplets we got to see. <3 these are good, I treasure them. But uh. I think I mostly just ship Locington wrt Wash? And WashMaine. OH. WashMaine friendship good. <3

Favorite headcanon: I always really liked the idea of Plural Wash but it’s not something that sticks in mind a lot. Unfortunately we do not think about him a lot lol

[nifftylicious]

here's a couple of notes n' stuf to get started!

👁 - despite being a niffty-centric blog and therefore sorta correlated with hazbin, this ground isn't pro-viv (literally like. she's done a bunch of shit that i just don't fuck with) or anything i just really like niffty lol. that being said, i don't excuse everything that happens within the show itself. and i definitely have opinions on things.

☕️ - generally sfw-ish (as the show gets), although, if anything saucy springs up (say, posts tagged as suggestive or whatever equivalent there is for here), i'd rather not have minors liking/rb, thankies

👁 - i am very sporadic and might not post in a while..

☕️ - i might private every once in a while. nothing personal btw /gen

👁 - NOT 100% spoiler-free! i'll tag but anything from the show itself is up tooooo *checks index card* episode 4.

- [ updated 1/26!!! ] i'm on episode 6!

- [ updated 2/1!!! ] episode 8!

☕️ - i'm fine with most things shipping-wise (barring val bc as ""funny"" as he is he's a fucking rapist creepazoid) just don't be weird weird and i'll be alright with ya