#the iv in my arm was poking me but had to stay on that grind

[zanncom]

hospital doodles

[hellotoji]

FATHER’S PERFECT LITTLE GIRL - IV | III + V | III + VI | III

Toji Fushiguro X fem!reader ; Gojo Satoru X fem!reader ; Getou Suguru X fem!reader ; Kento Nanami X fem!reader

❝I am Father Fushiguro,❞ he spoke again with his deep and measured voice, the grin never leaving his lips. ❝I take it you are our newcomers ?❞

‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾ You had desperately tried to stay away from the church of the town you’d just moved in - afraid of one of the priest, Father Fushiguro, however, it seemed that he’d always find you.

What you did not expect, however, was for three other men to find themselves interested in you, as well.

WARNINGS: sub!reader, they all have ginormous cocks, dub con, manipulation, age gap, praise kink, degrading kink, corruption kink, father kink, daddy kink, blasphemy, innocence, virginity kink, coercion, religion sex, vampires, church sex, priests, yandere themes, dark themes, threesome, foursome, smut, blood drinking, pseudo-incest, size kink, dacryphilia, pet names, dumbification, BDSM undertones, choking, grinding, dry-humping, graphic description of violence

So I decided to combine three chapters together since they’re pretty short !

CHAPTERS LIST

⁀➷word count: 3.2k + 4.1K + 2.3K

CHAPTER — III

part four

FATHER FUSHIGURO walked towards you with purpose. You were sweating bullets, with Suguru at your side, grining devilishly as he placed the gun on his desk. You noticed how the object was slightly shiny with your—well—wetness and your cheeks warmed up further.

Suguru crossed his arm, leaving you to lean on his desk next to you, he seemed to be leaving space for the man. "Father. Here you are."

Father Fushiguro nodded, "Officer." He stopped right in front of you, taking you in. You saw his eyes go from your legs, then slide further up between your legs then stop at your face before lingering at your neck.

You shivered. He slowly approached you further, carefully, like he was trying to not scare you and you couldn't believe how is the time he wanted to act considerate.

"My little girl." He greeted you as he gently caressed your cheeks, his voice was low and raspy but his tone felt soft, friendly even.

Your heart bloomed in your chest, you nearly wanted to lean into his touch. Why do you feel like this ? Could it actually be that you missed him ?

"How have you been, my beautiful ? Mmh ?" His voice is barely above a whisper. You don't understand why he's acting like this—so intimate with you. You also don't understand why it doesn't make you feel grossed out.

"Now, don't get so scared around me," Fushiguro chuckles humorlessly, "I don't bite."

You look outraged.

Father Fushiguro has the nerve to look sheepish. Him and Suguru both let out an honest laugh. The latter slides his hands around your waist and his eyes glides to your neck, "It seems the bite marks are healing properly uh ?" He hums, lightly poking at the wound and you whine, giving him a sharp glare. He lifts his hand up in surrender, smiling playfully. "I wonder when I'll get to mark you like that." He slides closer, speaking softly in your ear, "When will you let suck you dry ?" You can hear a pout in his voice, undoubtedly mocking.

"No. I—won't." You don't sound confident in what you're saying at all. They both know it. You know that they know it.

You used to feel like a weak lamb, thoughtlessly stuck in the lion's den. You're now in between said lion and a wolf, trying your hardness not to cower in front of them. You want to prove yourself that you're no longer a lamb, even if a small part of you is craving to be held again. A tiny part of you wants to feel precious, wants to be touched. Never in your life had anyone expressed such desire for you, and it's normal that you can't help but feel flattered by it, it's normal that you keep dreaming about hands all over your body and lips sucking and biting at your neck while whispering atrocities. All of this is entirely normal, you try to rationalize.

"This is very unorthodox." You blurt out. "I can't."

Getou snorts, "Quite mouthy without the haze uh ?"

"Love that side of her," Father Fushiguro murmurs, his other hand resting on your exposed thigh.

"You didn't seem that opposed to it earlier though..." Suguru starts, tone absolutely teasing and malicious, "When you were grinding on my gun like a proper pet, baby. Didn't really seem you were going to stop me if I took a taste." He grabs the gun on the table to show it off. With how sticky the object looked—you had no doubt your underwear was ruined.

You had nearly forgotten how hot and bothered he had left you—and his words seem to have rekindled the burning desire in your guts.

"Your heart is beating so loud, darling." Father Fushiguro's fingers are flirting with the button of your blouse, not undoing them but instead tracing your chest his idle hands. He's in no hurry.

Suguru uses his handgun to tilt your head up by pressing it under your chin, forcing you to keep eye contact, you arch your back and whimper as Father Fushiguro slips a hand under your shirt, bringing a much needed cooling sensation to your body. He then undoes the buttons, one by one at a cruelly slow pace.

The sensation are much more different now—brainwashing makes everything feel like a dream, an illusion. What's happening right now feels very much real, the murmurs in your ears, the hands on your body. It's overwhelming you, making your vision cloud with tears.

Suguru slides the thick barrel alongside your jaw, and you tense, painfully aware of how much damage his weapon could inflict you if he wasn't careful. He forced your jaw to go lax by aggressively cupping your cheek with his other hand, he then dipped the handgun inside your mouth. You thought he'd be content with just letting it sit on your tongue but he seemed to have something else in mind as he continued to push the weapon, completely filling your mouth.

"How has your body been feeling ?" Your hear the father ask you as the calloused pads of his fingertips graze against the flesh of your chest, so close to the mark Satoru left. You think he might be taunting you since he has left your body feeling sore and weak for days because of his bites. You don't recognize the honest concern in his tone, too busy trying to adapt the forced object in your mouth, trying not to drool, not to choke.

You're trying so hard. The man notices with an almost demeaning chuckle.

"Yeah. Any changes noted ?" Suguru prompts. "Ah. That's right." His grin is maniac, "Little pet can't talk." His tone only makes the heat inside of you hotter, you feel so small, so insignificant.

It's a physical ache, you need them. You tip your head back, eyes wet with shame.

Suguru's eyes are intense and heavy on your exposed body. You think he must decide that he likes what he sees as he leans down at your eye-level and swipes his tongue on his lips, "Never knew humans could look this sweet..." he muses.

Use your common sense... run !

Both men were so big, overpowering you so easily. If only you could get your bag and take your silver knife.

As if sensing your thoughts, Father Fushiguro suddenly reached for your bag, and opened it.

"Aaah... I see you have a knife." He hums then whistles lowly, feeling the weapon in his hand, "Silver on top of that. You came prepared."

You look at Father Fushiguro with round eyes, feeling horrified and suddenly hopeless. He can touch silver ? You thought vampires were allergic to silver.

Dread filled your stomach, you are sure he is going to get angry at you and that he'd hurt. Will you even come back home in one piece tonight ?

Suguru chuckles next to him, inspecting your neck with a strange intensity, maybe envy.

"My baby is so smart. Is that the plan you came up with to stop me ?" You expected the father to be upset... since you tried to expose the nature of his kind but he only sounds... weirdly amused. "I'm so so proud of you sweetheart." He cups your cheeks, tilting his head to the side. He kisses your forehead and your heart flutters in your chest.

You're so adorably confused, they're praising you left and right when you wanted to kill them. It makes Father Fushiguro place another kiss on your forehead and the action is so sweet, so chaste compared everything he's been doing. It gives you whiplashes.

"A good choice on top of that. Silver really is the only thing that can hurt us," Suguru sing-songs, you suddenly see his eyes gleam then switch from a dark and deep red to a lighter, amber color. He removed the gun from your mouth. "Her daddy raised her well. It's a shame you're too weak to take after him. I bet he would've loved to hunt us alongside you." He says, absently as he slides the gun alongside your face, trailing your spit.

You freeze, absolutely scared to move in case he suddenly decides to shoot a bullet through your skull. What does he know about your own father ? It seems that you're always kept in the dark, and frankly you're sick of it... if you knew what everybody else—except for you—seems to know you probably would be able to make better decisions. If you ever come out alive, you're going to demand an explanation from your parents. Do they not even care about you ? How come they're letting this happen ?

Your heart is breaking, and the last of your resolve with it. What can you do ? What did you even think you could do ? Your eyes feel prickly and before you know it tears are silently streaming down your face. You're looking down at the floor, with empty and desperate eyes.

"Angel, look at me." Father Fushiguro grabs your chin and lifts it up. You're met with beautiful green eyes and you wonder briefly what his real eye color could be. Green fits him well, you think. "I am not going to hurt you." Then the green is gone and replaced with a soothing orange.

His voice is clear and loud but you don't trust him, how could you ?

You suddenly start sobbing and it seems to take Suguru by surprise as he places his hand on your back, rubbing it. He's even placed the gun back on his desk. It's supposed to be comforting but you only tense up further at the physical contact.

"Y-you're going to eat me." You sniffle, with your eyes full of tears you can barely discern them anymore but it doesn't matter. You know they are there and that's enough to send goosebumps down your body.

Suguru nor Father Fushiguro deny your claim, considering that one of them has already eaten (or drank if you're precise) a bit of you, twice.

You only cry harder.

It looks like Suguru truly doesn't know what to do with a crying girl in his arms. He's taken aback. He forgot how sensitive humans can be. He's half-tempted to simply haze you—wouldn't that be the most logical solution ? However Father Fushiguro doesn't seem to think that it's the case. He bends down to be at your eyes level. "We're never going to kill you baby." He's trying to pacify you. You don't look convinced so he continues. "If we wanted you dead you'd already be dead." He says matter-of-factly.

It clearly doesn't work. More tears stream down your face.

"She's crying even more now" Suguru pipes in, unhelpful.

Father Fushiguro glares at him, "Well I'd like to see you try." He focuses back on you and gently wipes the tears away from your face, "Angel. No one will kill you. Never on my watch." His tone takes a gentler and more honest turn, "We'll protect you. Because you're our special little girl. You're ours." He forces your eyes to stay on him and you slowly melt into the warm amber.

You're ours.

You stop crying because you're bewildered. You're not sure what to feel, but you know your heart is not supposed to be beating that hard in your chest, and that your stomach shouldn't flutter when he cups your cheeks and looks at you with the most tender smile you've ever seen him have. He looks almost... humane.

"If it's too much, pet, we can make it stop." Suguru tries, as he massages your neck slowly. "I know it can be hard. We can shut it out."

Is that really a good idea though ?

Didn't you say that you were tired of running away ? Wouldn't this just be jumping back into your old habit of ignoring your problems ?

But still, the temptation feels too good.

You feel the telltale signs of the brainwashing. It might be Father Fushiguro because you're loosing yourself much too quickly—but you don't stop it. You let it happen, and suddenly everything is alright. You're alright, your heart is back in one piece.

Father Fushiguro caresses your cheek before he leans down to press your lips against his in a exchange. Every kisses you've shared with the man have always been feral and animalistic and this one isn't. It's slow and nearly sweet.

After a few seconds, it ends. Suguru takes a look at your glossy eyes and sighs. "This must've been very emotionally draining. You should go back home."

Oh.

You swear you're not disappointed.

Your body slowly feels like it belongs to you again as the magic wears off. You're confused, "You're letting me go—like that ?"

Granted, you've lost the will to fight them but this doesn't mean you can't run away.

Father Fushiguro and Suguru simply smirk, "It's okay." the latter reassures. "It's because we know you'll come back."

You won't.

Father Fushiguro merely lets out a chuckle, the corner of his mouth pulling up, "If you want to leave, baby, you can. But I know you'll come back." He lifts an eyebrow at your confusion, "You want to know why ? Because you're a slut, my slut and i know you more than you know yourself, little lamb."

You gulp, refusing to believe a word of it. "Y-you're horrible-" you stutter out, your vision prickling. How could he go from sweet to this in a second ? In the end he's just a vile vampire, there's nothing humane about him.

"And you want me." His tone is playful and light, as if he didn't take you seriously, as if all of this was merely an entertainment for him and this made your blood boil.

"No. I-I simply wasn't in my right mind." You press, "When—you did those things to me."

Father Fushiguro cocks his head to the side, then moves to sit on the chair in front of you, "You mean you were hazed ?" He explains.

So there was a word for it ?

"Yes I was." You say pointedly, your story starts to feel more and more convincing to yourself as you utter it out loud to the men. "Hazed. I was hazed. You brainwashed me."

"Ah," Father Fushiguro laughs. It's mocking and you suddenly feel dumb and weak, "It seems we've got to break you out of it now," he gives Suguru a look.

Suguru nods exitedly, "We don't want this to become an habit."

"Indeed."

You have no idea what they're talking about.

"__, sweetheart, would you take Suguru's gun for me ?" Father Fushiguro orders you, and as always, his voice is laced with something that makes your head feel hazy and foamy. You can't think.

"Here, my gun, doll," Suguru hands it to you, but you don't want to take it. You still do it, your hand moving before you can clearly think it through.

"Now, you're going to shoot a bullet right through my heart. Okay baby ?" He tone is so demeaning, like he's talking to a child. "Weren't you trying to kill me earlier ? This shouldn't be much different."

But it is. You've never wanted to kill per se—at least not yourself. You're not cut for killing.

"D-don't wa-wanna do it—it—" talking is hard. So many clashing thoughts and feelings in you. You want to please him, shouldn't you do what he's telling you ? But you're scared, you don't like guns, the weapon feels so heavy in your hands—and you think it's too late because your fingers are enclosing on the trigger—

"You don't want to do it ?" Again that demeaning tone. Your skin burns. "Doesn't really look like it to me, see baby ? You're so close to doing it. Good girl."

You're grinding your teeth to prevent you from whimpering.

You cry and scream and you force your body to fall on the floor with a sudden jerk—then you suddenly regain control of your body and your senses.

What even—?

Before you could angrily spit at him he interrupts you with loud and chilling laugh.

"Ah. You broke it. The haze."

Suguru lends you a hand to help you stand up but you ignore it and attempt to stand up on shaky legs by yourself—which results on you wobbling and falling back on him.

You don't know what emotion makes your body burn the most—shame or anger ?

"Hazing is not brainwashing." Suguru starts, "It helps you relax—I guess it also makes it easier for our deepest desires and needs to manifest." He places you back on the desk. The gun stays on the floor. "Well, Father knew all of this would be hard to wrap yourself around." Suguru explains, "We were just making it easier for you, angel." His expression becomes dark, "Well, then your mother broke the haze."

What did your mother have to do with all of this ?

Breaking the haze wasn't hard—nor was it easy but it was doable - you don't know how this never happened before. How come you never tried to break it before ? Were you really this weak-minded, this desperate, this depraved ?

You wish your mind would shut up. You don't want to think about anything.

"You want me to haze you, baby ?" Suguru asks nicely.

You nod defeatedly, you feel something die inside of you, that little spark that wanted to fight for what they did to you.

You feel yourself being wrapped around an imaginary blankets that prevents your shame and embarrassment from coming through. And you bask in it, swim in it, drown in the feeling. You slump, your eyelids suddenly feeling heavy.

"At this rate she'll be an addict." Getou notes and Father Fushiguro seems conflicted.

You're not even listening, you're too lost.

He lets out a sigh, "She might already be addicted to being bitten." He looks at you and you smile at him with unfocused eyes, "Adding hazing to the list won't change much."

"That's not a good thing." Getou merely states but he doesn't look much alarmed, it's nearly as if he couldn't care less.

"I know." His eyes get darker.

"But you like that she's becoming dependent of you ?"

You're so pliant like that. So sweet so nice.

"Father, frankly you're crazy." Suguru lets a breathy laugh.

Father Fushiguro rolls his eyes, "I'm not the one that fucked her on a gun. You're worse than your brothers."

Suguru has the audacity to even look offended. "Come on." He lifts an eyebrow, "No one is worse than Satoru. I'm hurt." He pouts, "And I actually waited until she came to me. Satoru is always too impatient."

Father Fushiguro seems to agree with him but still side eyes him, "Sometimesa, I cant believe Nanami is the youngest. He's more mature than the both of you combined." He then gives you a gentle look, "Now, sleep."

You obey.

CHAPTER — III

part five

YOU OPEN your eyes. Your head hurts, and you have to make a conscious effort to focus your sight on what lies above you - you quickly recognized it to be your mother's face, scrunched up in worry. You're in your bedroom, she's sitting on your bed.

"Darling." She says when you try to sit yourself up. She helps you and slides an arm around your waist, lightly hugging you. "Did you sleep well ?"

You repress the swarm of feelings pinching your heart. You're angry and disappointed in your parents. You won't let yourself get swayed by emotions although you did miss them. It feels like it's been forever since you've last seen them both

"... we have to talk." Your voice is groggy from all the sleep. Hazing is a great substitute for melatonin, you realize.

Your mother looks like she'd been expecting this. "Sure, darling, we can talk." She suddenly scoots to the side and you notice your father sitting on a chair, at the very back. Your eyes narrow.

With a twisted sense of satisfaction, you notice that he looks pretty unwell. He probably hasn't slept very well these past few days judging by the heavy bags under his eyes. His hair is messy and there's a light stubble on his face.

"You both know." You state.

But how much do they know ? You don't ask. You don't want to know. Embarrassment warms your cheeks. They surely know enough. You're secretly hoping they don't know about what transpired in the confessional.

You promised yourself you wouldn't let yourself be hurt by your parents anymore, but their reaction isn't something that you prepared yourself for. You were ready for guilt, culpability. Hell, you were even expecting them to try to deny to it.

Indifference isn't something you were expecting. Your heart constricts so hard in your chest it hurts. You gulp down your saliva, forcibly preventing yourself from crying. You don't want them to see you so affected. They don't deserve it.

The silence is defeating, but tells you more than you need to know.

Your mother gracefully smiles, the corners of her mouth lifting up, "We know."

"We have to leave this town." You hope you don't sound too desperate although you are—because you want to be mean, you want them to know how deeply hurt you are.

"Darling—"

"No. If you don't leave with me, I'll leave alone." Legally, you can do it. You're 18, an adult. However the thought feels foreign, you've never felt like an adult, never felt independent.

Your mother's facial features harden, her smiles is gone. She stares at you for what feels like hours, before tilting her head to the side, "You won't leave. You can't." Her tone is strangely ominous and it sets you off.

"I'm an adult. I can." You've never done so much as argue with your mother or your father before. There was no reason to, you've always done as they told. You've always been your parent's perfect little girl, but frankly you're tired of it.

Your vision of your parents is distorted and your trust in them shattered. The father who you use to hold in high regard is now nothing but a weak, fragile man in your eyes, always looking out into the space as if he couldn't fucking focus on what was happening in front of him. Your mother is a control freak, who thinks she can still boss you around now that you are a full fledged adult.

"What about the other villagers ? Are you going to leave them alone in their demise ?" She wonders with an airiness that ticks you off. You shake off the hand she placed on your waist.

It's not as if she cares about what happened to me—why should I care about strangers ? But still, that slight feeling of guilt you've been trying to repress is steadily growing. You're going to run away and leave the rest of this poor village to die.

"I can't do anything about it." You hiss, voice wavering and unclear, "I tried. I tried my best. On my own."

You had no idea how painful being angry at someone who doesn't care - or worse, doesn't seem to think they're in the wrong - is. Your heart constricts painfully in your chest for what feels like the hundredth time, there's so much you want to say but the words are caging in your throat, unable to come out.

Perhaps this is what your mother had been waiting for, because she gently presses her hand on your shoulder, her eyes softening, "But you can help." She says, tone mysterious and all-knowing, "If you want to. That is."

Your father doesn't do so much as utter a word.

You scoff, "There's nothing I can do. I can't get rid of them. I can't kill them."

"Now, who said anything about killing them ?" Your eyes shift to your father, your mother follows suit. She looks back at you. "I'm talking about giving them what they want."

Your blood runs cold.

Blood. Isn't blood what vampires want ? Father Fushiguro as well as Satoru both said that your blood was sweet—does it mean that it's good ? That they want more ?

You swallow. You can't believe you're considering it. You entertain the idea in your head - they said they wouldn't kill you, they said you were theirs.

Could it truly be that bad ? From what you've seen, being drank from isn't a completely distasteful experience, you dare admit.

You're midly appalled by your own thoughts.

"If I go with the vampires, will the other villagers be left alone ?" You ask. That would be the only reasonable option, your life is nothing compared to everybody else's.

Your mother thinks for a little while, "If I tell you that you're right, will you stay ?"

"What ?"

"With Father Fushiguro. Will you stay with him ?"

"I want the truth."

Your mother then lets out a sound akin to a snort, your eyes widen in shock, "Well then don't be so ridiculous." She shakes her head, "How could you feed an entire pack of vampires ? It's nearly as if you want them to drain you dry."

An entire pack ? There's more of them !? Of course there is, a voice in your head tells you. Of course. It's never so easy.

You can't even save a village.

"T-then I don't see how I can be of any help !" You're offended, the tone she used to speak to you made you feel small and dumb. It striked a nerve.

"You can lessen the damage." She corrects. You wait for her to explain more, she looks briefly at your father, he's still as dazed-looking. "We've made a sort of deal," she continues, "They want you. They will not kill you. I dare say that they're quite enamored by you, so I doubt they will treat you badly either. In exchange, they kill less people."

You have a gnawing feeling that she's not telling you everything.

"Does the church know of it ?"

"The church knows enough, but doesn't want to be too involved in this. Which is where you come along." She's right, you'd be doing a noble task. You'd be acting as a sacrificial lamb for a bigger cause. "It's an honor to be with father Fushiguro."

"I don't want this." You grit your teeth, your eyes filling with tears. You force yourself not to cry.

"You have a choice." She shrugs, "You can leave to go wherever you want. Without us. However no one, not even me, will be able to protect you if it is the case."

Protect you from what ? Other vampires ?

She's probably implying that she's been protecting you from vampires for a long time now. You think all of this happening, might not be an unfortunate accident after all. Perhaps even your grandmother and aunt's deaths. Perhaps it's all linked to the vampires.

"... there are more of them." You state. In what kind of world have you been living in ? "Why me ?" You ask the question that's been burning your lips. You always hear that you're special but what even makes you special ?

She dismisses your question with a wave of her hand, "It's too soon for that." She changes the subject, "As I said, we'll respect your choice. You can stay or leave. When you decide, there will be no turning back." She warns you.

"... you want me with the vampires." It's not a question. Your mother doesn't deny it. You never really had a choice to begin with. If you leave, there will probably be other vampires around to kill you. Either way, you're doomed. You have to choose the lesser evil. "If I go with them, you have to tell me everything you know."

"I'm afraid I cannot."

"Then answer my questions. You owe me answers."

You have a point.

"I'll allow you three questions. However there's only so much that I know. And even less that I can tell."

"You both knew this would happen when we moved here." By this you mean the chaotic mess you've been put in, "Are grandmother's and aunt's deaths related to this ?"

"Not directly, but it's linked." You think see hurt in her features before she quickly schools them.

"What happened to father ?" You inquire, "It seems like he's had a rough night." A rough night is putting it nicely—he looks absolutely wrecked. Your prim and proper father is unrecognizable. "Why does he look so dazed ?"

"... sedatives." The words rolled out of her tongue too hesitantly. It's odd considering that your mother is a confident woman who's never hesitant. She always seems to know everything. "He's been a bit too hyper."

She's lying.

Your eyes slide to your father. His eyes glide over you, looking at you but not seeing you. Something finally clicks in your head.

He's hazed.

Your brain runs too fast for you to even catch your own thoughts. Your father is being hazed. By who ? You're aware that hazing can last even when the vampire who did it isn't in proximity. Strong will, as you've experienced with Suguru, can break it.

You think back about what Father Fushiguro and Suguru told you.

"Your mother broke the haze."

How did she break the haze ? This is a complete mystery to you. Furthermore, if she's able to break the haze why isn't she breaking your father's ?

Because she wants him to stay like this.

Maybe they're not on the same page about you being sold off to the vampires. You don't know. You're not sure of anything.

One of the vampires mentioned something about your father hunting vampires back at the police station. It all makes sense. The big silver knife, the books.

"Can I talk with father ? Alone." The question comes out before you can really think it through.

Your mother looks at you suspiciously. You do your best not to let anything show.

"This will count as your third question."

You simply nod and your mother stands up gracefully to leave the room. You follow her to close it.

"Father." You exhale loudly as you turn to your father.

"My daughter." He says with a jovial grin, eyes empty, "How are you ?"

You place your hands on his shoulders, shaking him off, "You have to wake up—we must talk !"

He stares at you, for a long, long time, before his grin slips off and he looks at you with a somber expression, "Oh, how I've missed you these past few days." He continues rambling on, but his happy tone doesn't match his face. "Where were you ? Your mother thinks you're simply having a teenage crisis." He laughs, and you see him taking a small paper note out of his pocket.

You're absolutely confused, and he seems to sense it since he tilts his head to the side, probably referring to your mother at the other side of the door, "Please, reassure her that it's not the case." His tone doesn't change. He sounds blissfully ignorant of what's been transpiring around him. You realize it's a facade.

You unfold the paper note he's given you.

She's listening. Accept to go with the vampires. I promised I'll protect you.

You give him back the piece of paper, and he hides it back in his pocket.

Hope blooms in your chest before it withers just as fast. "Father," your voice is weak, "I'm alright. I simply do not need to be looked after all the time."

He gets the message, his expression folds in concern, "My daughter, you're still young, and clueless. It's my duty as your parent to look after you."

"Father—"

Your mother suddenly barges in. Her smile crisped. "Dinner is ready. Let's eat." She waits for the both of you. She's not going to leave you two alone again, you're sure.

Your father looks as unaware as he was before she left. What a good actor he is. He smiles, "My darling. What would I do without you ?"

"Not much." She simply says then looks at you, "You don't have much time. You should make up your mind, fast. They're waiting."

You shiver.

CHAPTER — III

part six

IT'S BEEN three days. And you've holed up in your room under the excuse of 'needing time to make a decision' when in reality, you already knew what you would do, you've known since you talked with your mother, and maybe, even before that.

You're not sure of anything. You want to avoid thinking, but there's nothing else to do. You're alone with your own thoughts.

The bites on your neck are practically healed now.

You think you need to speak with your father one more time, and possibly, with one of the vampires. They're more questions you need answered, and you feel like you deserve to know. However you're not sure if going to the blood-suckers—even if under the excuse of asking innocent questions—meant that you were ever coming back. And well, you're not quite ready to leave yet. You don't think you ever truly will be, but your feelings clearly don't matter in this.

Luckily the chance of talking to a vampire without you physically going to them comes to you unexpectedly. In the form of a doorbell ringing, and a tall man in a grey suit, round spectacles and slicked-back blonde sandy hair entering your home. Upon hearing the doorbell you'd quietly creeped out of your room and peered behind a wall as the stranger was welcomed by your mother. He gifted her a box of sweets, whatever, probably mochis—a simple curtesy when you're invited in one's home—and took off his coat—to expose a much too tight fitting blue shirt with the first few buttons undone, exposing a generous part of his collarbones.

He takes off his glasses to reveal, tired but menacing eyes—that briefly slide to you making your heart jolt in your chest. He makes no move to come to you, nor does he show that he's even noticed you but you're sure your eyes met for the briefest moments.

So you stay hidden, until he is led in the living room and offered a much needed cup of coffee by your mother. You've met the man before, at church. You're not sure of his nature but from now on you'll assume that anyone who's associated with Father Fushiguro is a vampire.

You have to talk to this man alone—but not too alone—as it could be dangerous for you. You need to be somewhere where you could scream for help and someone would actually come through.

For now you simply decide to wait for an opportunity to show itself. To occupy yourself, you listen to their discussion. They talk about mundane things, the weather, the news. Your mother asks him how work is and he replies in his smooth and deep voice that it's been treating him well. His manner of speaking is slow and articulate. You don't hear your father's voice, you guess he isn't there.

Maybe you could go talk to him, you guess he's alone and your mom is busy entertaining a guest.

It's then that the stranger asks your mother where the toilets are, and she gently tells him.

You watch him leave the living room, and it's only when you're sure that your mother won't see you nor hear you that you show yourself.

The stranger hardly looks surprised to see you and a slow and lazy grin forms on his previously straight lips. Unlike the other vampires you've encountered, his isn't arrogant or cocky.

"It's not good to spy on people." He chastises, and your heart somersaults from the surprise. You thought you were stealthy.

"I was simply waiting for an opportunity." You try to save face, shrugging. "I want to talk to you." You're mildly satisfied that you did not stammer and managed to sound twice as confident as you feel. You want the shy and weak little girl to be gone and be replaced by a strong adult women. Fake it until you make it. It's your new motto.

"And you are ?" He questions with no animosity, but you still feel your assurance crumbles like a house made of cards. He doesn't know you. You thought he certainly did considering the sordid things you've done with his friends. "I haven't had the honor of being properly introduced to you yet." He bows quickly.

Your problem, you'll realize in the future, is that you're so easily swayed, so easily tricked and manipulated. Of course he knows about you. He knows so much about you.

"We met at church... about a month ago." You tell him your name.

Right. A month ago, 30 days, 720 hours, it has already been that long since you moved here. Most of the month was spent avoiding the world in your room, though.

"I've heard about you. Good and bad things." there's always that politeness coated with his words. It makes him sound sarcastic or downright mean. You don't think he means it that way, but it still kind of stings. You're not particularly curious as to what he must know about you. Instead you take a step back, weirdly conscious of how little space there is between the two of you.

"You're a vampire."

He blinks twice, incredulous, "I am Kento Nanami." He corrects, "And a vampire as well." He says the latter part with a airiness to it, like it is a minor detail that can be disregarded.

Adrenaline pumps into your veins. You should've taken your silver knife. Or maybe if he tries anything you can still scream for help. Maybe your mother would help. Or your father. You hope.

He lets out a low sigh. "Don't be so tense. I won't hurt you."

"I'm not tense." You lie through your teeth. Apparently this new version of yourself you're trying to make is also a bad liar.

"Your heartbeat is going very fast..." he says with a note of concern. His eyebrows furrows. "You know that repeated stress can be harmful for your health..."

You decide to ignore the fact that he can hear your heartbeat. You can't believe your ears. "Well, if you're that worried about my health you should probably leave, along with your vampire friends."

"That's..." he trails off, looking sheepish, "That's not really an option."

"Why ? Are the villager's blood that good ?"

"No." He says quickly, with an appalled frown. "We didn't come here for the villagers."

"So you came here for me ?" You boldly ask. It helps that although he is very big and tall, he doesn't ooze intimidation like Father Fushiguro. You're sure that under the Father's gaze, you would've already crumpled in fear.

He steps closer and you immediately step backwards. "Yes we did." He sounds defensive, his eyes narrow.

"I don't know any of you ! Why would I even come with you ?"

He merely stares at you, the grin off his face. He simply looks annoyed. "There's so much that you don't know."

"Because no one is telling me anything !"

"Your situation is more dire than you think. You're currently putting your family in danger, yourself as well. Coming with us will be the only way of protecting them."

You scoff. Everything is their fault and yet they're trying to make it sound as if you've got anything to do with it ! "Protecting them for you, you mean."

He chuckles humorlessly, sliding his hand through his hair in what you think might be frustration—and wow, his hand is big. "No. Little girl." Another dry chuckle, "Not from us."

"Why are you trying to convince me to come to you ?"

He tilts his head to the side, "I'm not trying to convince you." his answer is quick and clear, "Because we both know that you'll come whatever I tell you." his tone is factual, "I just thought that answering a few questions would be considerate."

"How hypocritical, now you care about being considerate ?"

"Believe us or not. We've been nothing but considerate from the very start. Considering your situation, you shouldn't even have been given a choice to begin with."

"There's no real choice to make here. My mom sold me to you blood-sucking leeches !"

"Blood-sucking leeches. Now that's a new one." He snorts, "And you always have a choice. You can either make a bad choice, or an idiotic choice. It's your call."

You stay silent. He looks at you intensely, like he's trying to read, to figure you out.

You look at him suspiciously, "Are you going to haze me ?"

He lifts an eyebrow and you try not to dwell on how attractive the action is. "Do you want to be hazed ?"

"No." You don't sound convincing. "I don't. But your kind doesn't seem to care much for consent, do they ?" You spit, as you recall your previous encounters with vampires. "They don't seem to care about what I want when they make me do h-horrendous things."

And—the stuttering is back. You think disappointedly, you still hope you got your message across and managed to sound disdainful enough.

"Ah." He grins wolfishly, like what you're saying is funny as he makes a move to close the space between you. "I thought we had already made it clear." He shakes his head, amused. " I thought you knew by now that if you act like a slut when you're hazed—is because you are a slut."

"I-I'm not a slut."

"Ah really ?" He steps even closer and you feel forced to look down at your feet to not feel the embarrassing heat of his all-knowing gaze. "Would a girl who's not a slut borrow dirty books and take them to church with her ?" He purrs in your ear and the temperature in your body skyrockets, "Would a good girl be having a wet dream about a priest, no less ?" You force your eyes closed as a familiar heat begins to simmer in your guts. He loves how easy it is to rile you up. "You make the prettiest slut." His thumb caresses your lip. "With perfect dick-sucking lips, always looking like you're dying to suck some quality cock."  He cups your cheeks, "And only the dirtiest slut would get wet by being talked to like that. Don't you think sweetheart ?"

Your face is positively burning. You can't exactly deny the wetness that has started pooling in your underwear.

"Cat got your tongue ?" He lifts your chin up and you meet his amber colored eyes. You watch suddenly, and furiously switch to a deep crimson red as they widen is mortification. "... you... should go to the bathroom." He suddenly says ominously.

"W-what ?" Your bladder feels positively empty.

He has to audacity to flush, and it is a sight to behold. His demeanor completely changes from a confident one to an embarrassed one as he moves away from you. He looks to the side and swallows, you see his Adam apple bop. "Because you've started your period."

★・・・★

You have started your period.

Unfortunately, you're not one of those vagina owner that have been blessed with painless menstruations—yours are usually spent on your bed, wailing in pain waiting for the painkillers to kick in.

What's even more unfortunate, is that you're not allowed the luxury to do that today, as you're sat right in front of your mother, with your father at her side, eating dinner.

As usual, not much is said, that is, until your mother suddenly lets her fork fall down her plate with a loud thud, making you look up at her.

"We don't have much time left." She says, panicking, "I don't know why you're so intent on stalling when the choice is obvious !"

"I need time to make up my mind," you protest weakly.

"Darling—" your father starts before he's cut off.

She exhales loudly. "I should apologize for what I'm putting you through. But I'm not sorry. One day you'll know, you'll understand." She stares at you desperately. "I only want what's best for you, whatever your father told you the other day, forget it. Even he knows that you're not safe with us anymore !"

She doesn't seem to know that your father told you to join the vampires, you think with a sarcastic laugh, she seems to think he's told you to run away.

Your father is not hazed anymore, he hasn't been for the last two days—or he's simply stopped acting as if he was hazed. You don't know, you two haven't talked since he told you to go with the leeches.

"Stop it." Your father tells your mother, he resumes eating, his jaw tensed, his facial expression strained, "Darling," he turns to you with sadness in his eyes "This our last dinner together. Let's enjoy it."

"I've taken upon myself to notify Mr.Kento that you've made the right choice." She makes an effort to sound more calm. "After you've had your little talk with him. I trust that you know what I'm referring to ?"

You swallow the lump in your throat. Of course she knew about it, she seems to know about everything.

"You'll be going with the vampires." She says her final words.

You only nod, not trusting yourself to speak without bursting into sobs.

The next morning when you open your eyes. You're not in your little bedroom anymore.

previous chapter | next chapter

[sweetiejunie]

Jealous

Summary: You get jealous that he was ‘flirting’ with another idol

Genre: fluff, smut «dont read if you dislike this, you have been warned»

Yeonjun x reader

—.*•—

💕request by anon: Hi! May I request jealous sex with Yeonjun? In which case the reader get's jealous of another idol being too close with Yeonjun?

A/n: havent wrote a smut in a while, hope you liked this!

======================================

You were ignoring him. Was it petty? Yes. Was it necessary? Well, to you it was. Did he deserve it? That was debatable, but to you it was a hell yeah he did.

So, what exactly did he do that made you this mad? Some may say it was harmless. Some may say you were overreacting. But he was flirting with another girl! Right in front of you! Another idol to be exact.

Okay sure, technically the both of you weren’t in a relationship. And yes, he had free will do what he wanted. The relationship between the two of you could have been described as... complicated. It was painfully obvious that the two of you liked each other. I mean, every-time you passed each other, yeonjun would either blow you a kiss or wink at you playfully. And you loved to tease him every now and then. Throwing him random complements that added to his — already— overinflated ego and then breaking it down again and vice versa. It was all in good fun, of course. And he knew that. It was just how your dynamic worked with him. It had been months since it first started, and you practically already acted like a couple, with all the hand holding, kissing and things that were better left to the imagination. You just never made it official, but everyone who knew you, knew the both of you were off limits.

Long story short, that’s how yeonjun ended up in you apartment. You hadn’t expected him to show up so soon. You left shortly after you witnessed the whole... ordeal... take place. You had just taken a shower, wrapping yourself in your thin silk robe when your door bell rang. And here he was.

“Come on y/n, I’ve already apologised.” He tried for what was most likely the tenth time.

You didn’t budge. Frankly speaking, you’ve already forgiven him, maybe after his second apology or so. But seeing his attempts to gain your forgiveness was just too cute to pass on. You were sure he had figured that out by now and was simply playing alone.

“Y/n, please? I’m sorry.” He pouted this time, trying to catch you glance. Giving you puppy dog eyes the entire time. “I was just kidding. You know i would never hit on anyone other than you.”

You didn’t reply, trying your hardest not to let a smile break your, slowly but surely, shattering demeanour .

“Y/nnnnn,” he whined again, poking your cheek. “I swear i was just having a conversation.”

Gosh, why did this boy had to be so darn cute all the time.

You let giggled escape this time. By the time you caught yourself, he’d already noticed. And he took that opportunity to hook an arm around your waist, tugging you closer to him. Sealing your back against his chest.

Something pulled at his lips, “i really am sorry.” A short pause before he continued. “Were you really that jealous?” You weren’t even facing him, but you hear the smug grin that was plastered on his face.

His question caught you off guard. “I- I was not jealous.” Never have you wanted to crawl under the table as much as you did in this moment.

Interest sparked in his eyes. “Is that so?” His hands rubbing gentle circles against your sides. “My mistake, then. But i have to admit,” he leaned in closer to your ear to whisper, “that knowledge actually made me extremely turned on.”

Your cheeks coloured at his confession. How were you supposed to reply to that?

“Baby... let me make it up to you,” he murmured.

He placed his hand on your shoulders, spinning you to face him as he leaned towards you. His lips were soft yet unrelentingly firm. Wasting no time to make your thoughts go blurry with nothing but the idea of him. He let his hand slide down your thighs, over the robe you wore. Lifting you to your toes then hire, he wrapped your legs around his waist. The lower half of the robe parted as the upper half rolled of your shoulders.

Yeonjun’s growing hardness pressed into you, and your body answered on its own accord, moving against him, dragging a grunt out from him. You weren’t sure if it was his hand kneading at your rear, feeling of him between your thighs or the intensity of the kiss that drove you closer to the edge. Perhaps it was a combination of everything. Everything about this man drove you insane.

“Bedroom?” His chest rising heavily against yours.

You nodded and his lips were back on yours as he walked you both to your room. Not having to look where he was going, he knew your entire apartment by muscle memory.

After several moments, one of his arms folded over your waist, his other in your hair as he lowered you onto the bed. The back of head rested on your pillows as his hand eased from underneath you. You opened your eyes when you felt the bed dip with his weight. His hands on either side of your head as he hovered over you.

Noticing that the robe had now slipped even further, you wanted to cover yourself. But you didn’t move. The swells of your breasts were now visible, and an entire leg was out, all the way to you hip. You simply shifted your gaze to his.

Neither of you spoke as his chests rose and fell, his breathing as uneven as yours. His lips parted, but no words came out. His muscles rigid as he held him up before he ducked his to neck. Kissing a trail along your jaw, down to your collar bones. Your breath hitched as you burned more.

“Y/n...” there was an abundance of need in that one word, your name. “Let me make it up to you the only way i know how.”

His hand drifted over you stomach, where your skin had been exposed. You could barely breathe or think as his lips brushed against the neckline of the robe. You felt the warm glide of his tongue through the fabric. You gasped, shocked by the act and rush that it brought you. His gaze lifted to you as his mouth closed over the tip of your breast. He sucked deep and long, and your gasp quickly turned into a cry. You felt his hand move closer to where you needed him the most, pressing down against your bundle of nerves.

“Fuck,” you sighed.

“Mmm.” His lips shifted back to your neck. “You like that, baby?”

There was no point replying. He already knew the answer, and he did it again, causing you to whimper more.

“You’re very wet, y/n.” He breathed against your jaw. “I like that.” A pause. “I also like how you react to my touch.”

Without another word, yeonjun turned you to the side, away from him. Confused, you looked back to him as he stretched out behind you. He rested on his elbow and met your eyes.

“I’ll take care of you,” he hummed, pulling you into the cradle of his hip.

Your robe had slipped and now there was nothing but the jeans he wore between your bare rear and the hard length of him. You bit your lip as he trailed down you side and lifted your leg, sliding one of his between. His hand drew along your body before meeting with your wetness. His touch remaining light, almost featherlike, as he slid a finger across your center, causing your entire body to twitch. He continued this motion for what felt like eternity, and then he sank that finger in. You kicked your head back against his chest, letting out a breathy moan.

“You’re the only one for me,” he grunted. “You know that.” He pulled his finger almost completely out of you before inching it back in again.

You couldn’t respond as fire sparked inside of you with each thrust of his finger. He angled his hand so that his thumb could brush against your sensitive nerves. Each motion taking more breathe out of you. His worked his other arm around you, and across your chest. Palming and squeezing your breast as he worked in a second finger.

“Yeonjun.” You managed, your hips still moving.

And you could tell he was loosing his composure when he replied. “Ah fuck.” He sucked in a breath. “Just ride my fingers.”

You cried out, rubbing harder against his hand, against him. His breaths hitched in his throat as you did this. Looking back, you saw him watching hand, watching you grind and clench around them. Right then, you couldn’t even remember what you had been jealous about. Was it some bitch? Well, she wasn’t the one here with yeonjun now. Your stomach tightened as you continued to ride his fingers, riding his length that pressed against you behind.

He started to move so there was space between your bodies. Instead, you reached for his hip, nails digging into his skin as a silent demand.

And yeonjun obeyed.

He stilled, cursing as his plunged his fingers faster, rubbing your clit harder. You rocked against him, the feeling in your lower stomach becoming too much. With a final thrust, you moaned out when you came. You shuddered around his fingers and he shuddered against you, still moving his digits, exploiting every sensation from you until you went limb in his arms.

You stayed there, both your breathing slowly steadying. He eased out of you and you turned your head to face him. You expected to see that cocky grin of his. But you caught the red hue that tinted his cheeks instead. And slowly you became aware of the dampness at your lower back. You eyes widened when you realised.

“Sorry,” a sheepish smirk appearing, pulling your robe back to its original state. “Only you could do this to me.”

Now it was your turn for your lips to twitch. “I guess i should get jealous more often, huh?”

“So you were jealous~” he sang.

“Shut up.”

.

.

.

======================================

What was this 😀 i think ive been reading too much

[thcweasley]

Yours

PAIRING : George Weasley X Y/N

SUMMARY : George getting jealous of his twin brother for being closer to you .

WARNINGS : none? Make out? implying things? hehe

WORDS : 1.7k

A/N: lol this hits too close to home, growing up i was shadowed by heather sister :(  I was going to turn this into smut but im not sure.. cos i never wrote a smut before lol.

“Focus on your work Weasley” Snape smacked George Weasley’s head with the book he was holding, causing the whole class to look at his direction.

George was already an easily distracted person to begin with. but today especially, he got his mind somewhere else.

He was looking at you and his twin brother Fred, giggling while trying to figure out snape’s task. All of his life he never thought that he would feel this much jealously towards the older twin. Sure, sometimes it bothers him a bit that people pay more attention to him, or the fact that people always refers them as “Fred & George”, not “George & Fred”. But he knew it’s a silly thing to be bothered about so he always managed to brush it off.

But not today, Fred had been assigned with you. The girl George met on his last solo trip to honeydukes. It shocked him how he never saw you around before, despite being in the same house and grade. But hes glad that he met you. George didn’t like to be cheesy, but he was so sure that you were made for him. Whenever youre around, he just felt so happy. You’re funny, kind, and on top of all you’re prettiest thing he ever seen. Sadly, for him, other people seems to think that way about you.

He introduced you 2 weeks ago to his brother and friends. You seem to get along great with everyone. He liked that, his brother and friends is everything for him. But he cant help it but feeling a little bit jealous. He didn’t wanna admit it but this jealously is most probably because he was insecure about his feeling for you. Before everything he was sure that you fancy him the same way he fancies you. But now, hes not sure. And he hated it, youre supposed to be his girl.

The class that felt so long was finally over. George quickly stood up, walking towards the common room. he just want to burry his face onto his bed now. He felt an arm linking his. “Hey you” it was you. He let out a big sigh, not knowing how to feel right now.

“Hey, did you have a good time today?” He hated how catty he sounded. Knowing you, he knew you wouldn’t able to tell.

“Yeah it was fun. Your brother is hilarious you know that?” He rolled his eyes, feeling his face getting hot.

“Well yeah hes a clown” George answered shortly. Wanting you both could just drop this conversation. He didn’t like this, being jealous of his twin brother.

“ahah yeah true, youre also funny too you know” You leaned your head onto Georges arm. At this point it was hard for him to not just pulls you into a big hug. “Whats your plan for the rest of the day?” You asked looking up on him.

“Im not sure, probably just sleep” George answered looking down to you. You looked so cute leaning on to him.

“Wanna have a study date? Snape’s test tomorrow right?” George’s ears perked up at the word date.

A smile creeps on his face. “Yeah sure”

“Brilliant! I’ll see you in 2 hours then!” You gave his arm a squeeze before you go. Leaving George all smiley by himself.

2 hours later, George found himself getting ready for his study date. He finally going to make a move on you. Its obvious that you fancy him now right? At least you were the one who refers their study session as a study date.

He tried to look around for Fred but he was nowhere to be found. He feels weird do anything without asking for the older brother’s advice. But it was time to go to meet you at the Library and he didn’t want to make you wait, so he just decided to cross his fingers and hope for the best.

“Hey” George greeted you, big smile on his face. You look up at him from the book you were reading, smiling back at him. “You got a lot of stuff here” He sat down beside you, looking at paper and pens in front of him.

“Oh its not mine” You answered. “So, do you have anything you’re particularly struggling with?”

Whilst you tried your best to explain the things that he was struggling with. George was doing his best to stay focus on what youre saying instead of you. He cant help but admire your face, your cheeks, your lips. He wonders how would it feel like you press his lips against yours.

“Are you listening to me George?” You asked, knowing the answer pretty well.

“Uh yeah, im sorry I got distracted” he blinked.

You brought your hand on to his head, messing with his red hair. “you’ve been a bit distracted these days. didn’t you got smacked on your head earlier today by Snape?” you chuckled a bit running your fingers on the back of his head. “Did it hurt?” You tilted her head closer to him, rubbing the back of his head.

He couldn’t seem to think straight at this point. The fact that youre so close to him right now, he could smell your scent. He took a deep breath trying to be brave and make a move. He put his hand on top of yours, pulling it away from his head. “Y/N..” He started, linking his fingers with yours. “I think I like you”

“Yeah?” You chuckled feeling. your cheeks starting to get warm. “Whats going on George? Why are you suddenly so serious?”

“Well, Im not sure how you feel about me. But I got nothing to lose so here I am. I like you” Surprised by his words, you didn’t say anything. So he thought he could just make a move then. He leaned in closer to you getting you lips closer to each other. Not knowing what to do you just close your eyes. He smiled, taking this as a greenlight to proceed his act. Until all of the sudden-

“Your tea is here!!” Fred walked in, causing them to pull away from each other. “Hey that’s my seat George, do you not see the stuffs on the table?” He said as he sat down filling the gap between You and George.

“Fred what are you doing here?” George asked, clearly  frustrated with the situation.

“That’s not how you greet people, my dear brother” He said handing you the tea he was talking about. “Besides, youre not the only one who got invited to this study group. Right Y/N?” You just nod at him feeling flustered, thinking about what could’ve happened if Fred didn’t just walk in.

The next day, George has been avoiding you since last night. He thought you guys shared the same feeling. But yesterday proved him wrong. He was just another friend to you

Snape’s exam was a group work, being Fred’s partner obviously made you work with him for the exam. You looked so happy, George wishes it was him working with you instead of his twin brother. He hated this so much, it’s ridiculous how jealous he felt towards his twin brother right now.

The exam’s finally over, George saw you coming up to him from the corner of his eyes. “Hey” you greeted him. “Wanna go to Three Broomstick later? I haven’t really seen you all week”

“Who’s coming?” He asked, hoping this time its just the two of you. And everything that he thought about last night wasn’t true.

“Uh everyone. Fred, Lee, Angelina and others im not sure” George snickered. How stupid of him to think that you wanna be alone with him. How stupid of him to think he got a chance with you.

“I think im gonna pass on that” he took a deep breath. “Im tired. Ill see you around” He left you dumb folded, walking away towards his room.

The night comes around. The common room feels empty, his friends had left him for Three Broomstick. George just chilling alone on his bed when he heard someone opened the door.

“George?” You walked towards him, sitting at the end of his bed “Hey, im just.. I just wanna make sure everything is okay”

“Why you here” George answered bitterly. “Arent you suppose to be out with your friends, with my brother?”

“Well yeah but I wanna check up on you. And talk about last night..”

“What do you wanna talk about Y/N?” He took a deep breath. “I already get it, you see me as a friend. If anything, you like Fred more than me. I get it don’t worry. Everyone always picks him over me, im used to it”

“George…” you scotched in closer too him, trying to stop him from rambling all these nonsenses.

“Im not even sure why I thought you like me, he is the better twin. Im just me. I just thought I have a chance with you. Throughout my life, ive always get hands down from my siblings, share with my siblings.” He realised how ridiculous he sounded but it didn’t stop him. “I love how you get along with my friends. But, i just thought, I thought youre my person. Finally someone I can proudly say mine. I thought you feel the same way as I do…” Georges voice was getting quitter when he felt your hand grabbing his. “I like you a lot and I get that you don’t feel the same way. So if youre coming here to explain that i-“

His words were cut off by your lips crashing to his. “You never let me speak Georgie”  You murmured against his lips “I don’t know how you got it all wrong” you kissed his cheek lightly. “I didn’t know you felt that way. George. I like you, im your person. Ive always been“

With a big smile he pulled in for another kiss. He held on to your waist pulling you closer to him, positioning you onto his lap. You threw your and around his neck, deepening the kiss whilst his hands lazily griped your waist.

You can feel something poking between the inner part of your legs. With a slight smile you press your legs more on to him, grinding it against him. Earning a low groan from him.

He held your hips down on him, so both of you can feel more of the friction. His lips travelled to your jaw and to the back of your neck. You could feel his hot breath, sending shivers down your spine as he moved his lips closer to your ears. “Prove it” OKAY SO Let me know if you want a part 2 smut off of this HAHAH.

hehe part 2

this was quite hard to write cos i feel bad for him ahaha. this is loosely based on a true story. but i never got my Y/N :’)

MY OTHER WORKS follow me / send request / talk to me! im lonely (if u send me anonymously maybe click here) my collaborative ford anglia playlist Christmas with the Weasley playlist

[ukaisprincesss]

hii Art!!! may i request some wedding night smut with tanaka 😏😏 THANK YOU!! 💕

a/n: Hellooooo beautiful!!! 🖤 Yesss ive been waiting for a tanaka request 😌😌 sorry it took so long ),:

word count: 1.6k

semi-edited

———————————————————————

warnings: 18+ smut, so much fluff, minor name calling, cursing, choking, oral m! receiving and f! receiving

———————————————————————

“I now pronounce you, husband and wife.”

You met Tanaka’s teary eyes with your own, your love for him displayed in the depths of your sparkling eyes. Hands held together, he leaned forward and pressed his lips against yours. The distant whoops and cheers were washed away in the background as you melted into Tanaka’s arms.

Reluctantly pulling away Tanaka mumbled, “As much as I enjoy this, I don’t think this is supposed to last as long as we would like it to.” You giggled and cupped his face in your hands, pressing a light kiss on the side of his mouth. Hand in his, you both turned around and smiled at your friends and family. Multiple flashes lit up the area as pictures were taken.

The rest of the afternoon was filled with games, dancing, and your personal favorites, karaoke from Bokuto and Noya along with Yachi catching your bouquet. As the night crept up on the happy crowd, things were slowly put up and goodbyes were said. You and Ryuu had a honeymoon planned, but didn’t leave until the day after tomorrow.

“Well Mrs.Tanaka,” Ryuu said as he twirled you around to face him. “Shall we...head off?” He pressed kisses against the side of your neck, slowly trailing up to your jaw. It was moments like these that would stick with you, soft and intimate where Ryuu saw you as a goddess in his eyes. You smiled and let out a small sound of agreement, eyes closed and head tilted back. Ryuu smirked and lifted you up bridal style. You gasped and clutched onto his suit, sending him a playful frown as he laughed.

“How are we-” you were cut off by Tanaka’s tutting. “Ah ah ah, that my dear y/n has already been taken care of. It’s a surprise.” You wondered what he could’ve possibly pulled off but knowing him it could be anything. You tried to slide out of Tanaka’s arms, but he tightened his hold on you and insisted that you stayed in his arms. You made sure the ends of your dress weren’t dragging on the ground as he carried you to the entrance of the outdoor venue.

“No Ryuu...you didn't.” You stared in awe at what was a horse drawn carriage with flowers and lights decorating the cabin. Two beautiful and large mottled gray horses at the front, the driver sat behind them on a small bench.

“You like it?” Tanaka asked smugly. He was quite proud of himself for coming up with this (with the help of Suga) and knew you would love it.

“Do I like it?!” You screeched, hitting his chest. “This is like a dream come true,” you sighed happily. Pressing a kiss against your forehead, he opened the side door and sat you down gently. He climbed in from the other side and leaned forward to speak with the driver.

“Enjoy the ride and view,” the driver spoke with a charming heavy middle eastern accent. At the crack of the whip hitting the ground, the horses plowed forward and set into a trot. Giggling you gripped Tanaka’s arm overjoyed. You felt like a real princess with your prince in your carriage.

The ride was everything you could’ve imagine and more. The pleasing clop of the horses hooves and the light breeze that blew through your carriage windows paired perfectly with the twinkling lights that were strung around you. Tanaka made several sneaky passes at you but you quickly admonished his horny self so you could enjoy the ride.

You were disappointed when it was time to get off, you could ride that for hours living out your princess dream. As you sat daydreaming about the ride, Tanaka opened your door with a flourish bow holding his hand out to take yours. You grabbed it and stepped out, giving an exaggerated curtsy. You thanked the driver expressing your enjoyment for the ride and waved goodbye as the horses pulled him away.

“This way my queen,” Ryuu had picked you up again and carried you to your front door. Pausing, he looked at you intently then stepped over the threshold. You grinned and gave him a kiss, patting him to put you down. “Not a chance my love, I'm taking you to our bed and ravishing my beautiful wife.”

You squealed as he raced to your room, lightly throwing you on the bed. You sat up on your elbows with a hungry gaze as he took off his suit and tie, leaving him in a tight white button up and slacks. The faint outline of his abs pressed against the shirt catching your attention. Tanaka smirked and flexed before unbuckling his pants and practically tearing off his shirt. He crawled on top of you, hungry gaze traveling up and down your body.

“You look so beautiful in this dress y/n, I almost don’t want to take it off. But,” he drawled out before slowly pulling down the zipper on the back of your dress. Your breath hitched at the feeling of his calloused hands brushing against your back. Ryuu murmured compliments of every part of your body as he carefully took your dress off.

Bare in your bra and underwear, Ryuu traced kisses up your stomach to the middle of your chest. Sucking your nipple through your bra he expertly unclasped it with one hand, the other sliding down your panties. You lifted your hips and let out a faint moan, the ghost-like feeling of Tanaka’s lips on your breast seeping through the fabric.

“You deserve to be worshiped my goddess, don’t hold back I want to hear you.” Ryuu mumbled as he slid the straps of your bra down your arms before attacking your breasts with his mouth and hand. You let out a moan and fidgeted beneath him, grinding on the thigh he placed between your legs. Your clit pulsed and the feeling of an incoming orgasm tingled through you. “R-ryuu I’m gonna cum,” you moaned, gripping the sheets as he nipped at your nipple and tweaked the other.

“Cum on my thigh princess,” he growled before digging his thigh harder against your slit. You let out a wanton moan and grounded against him as you fell apart. You twisted your head as Tanaka stood up, the two of you breathing heavily. Your eyes drifted down to the tent in Ryuu’s boxers, the head of his cock poking out the slit. Without thought you pulled down his boxers, his cock springing up to hit his stomach. You wrapped one hand around it, your fingers struggled to meet. You pressed a kiss on the swollen head before peppering kitten licks all along his cock.

“Fuck y/n,don’t be a tease princess.” Ryuu pried open your mouth with his fingers before gripping your hair and guiding you along his length. Fueled by his moans, you pushed his dick further into your mouth and moaned. Tanaka hissed and ripped your mouth off. “Don’t get me distracted, love, this night is about you.”

Grabbing your ankles Tanaka pulled you forward before dipping his head between your legs and licking a long line up your cunt. You gasped and arched your back at the unexpected pleasure. He pinned you down with one hand on your stomach and the other holding your thigh. Ryuu devoured you like a man who was starved, tongue delving into your wet cunt, desperate to collect every drop of your juice. Your eyes rolled back as he lightly but your clit, sending you into a strong orgasm. You moaned and rolled your hips as Tanaka didn’t let up. He continued to suck your clit as another orgasm washed over you.

“Ryuu please it’s too much.” You whined, thrashing around. He didn’t say anything as he let you go with one last suck to your clit. “Are you ready for my cock princess?” He mumbled while sucking on the inside of your thigh. You nodded and whined, attempting to squeeze your thighs together. Tanaka pulled them apart with his large hands and positioned himself between you, his cock brushing against your pussy.

You gasped as he slowly sunk into you, your walls clenched tightly around him in anticipation. He groaned and muttered out, “Relax princess, you’re too tight. You’re gonna make me cum too soon.” You huffed and let your body relax, sinking into the mattress. He inched his cock forward before bottoming out, leaving you two breathless. No matter how many times you took his large cock, you would never be able to take it without struggle. His long and slow thrusts sent you into a frenzy, but you needed more.

“Ryuu...I need more, faster.” You whimpered, meeting his eyes. He smirked and pulled out before thrusting into you. The force pushed you back and you clawed his back and groaned. He pounded into you, his cock hitting the special spot that made your body twist and turn.

Tanaka moaned and wrapped a hand around your throat. “God y/n you’re so perfect, my little cock whore.” He gritted his teeth, quickening his thrusts. You gasped and threw your head back, letting out a scream as you came.

“Ugh fuck,” Tanaka held you in place, shooting ropes of hot sticky cum into your cunt.

Careful not to crush you, Tanaka laid on top of you supporting his weight with his arms. He pressed a kiss to your sweaty forehead, brushing your hair out of your face. “Ready for round two Mrs.Tanaka?” You smiled and cupped his cheek. “Am I ever Mr.Tanaka.”

[marypsue]

Having an extraordinarily real one lately for no apparent reason, so here’s a more-than-usually self-indulgent ficlet. Enjoy. Or don’t, I’m not the boss of you.

...

The next thing he remembers, somebody’s giving him a sharp poke in the shoulder. “Hey. Are you alive?”

He tries to roll over and go back to sleep, but the prodding continues. And every inch of him’s screaming in protest, so lying here and taking it suddenly seems like the better part of valour. “No. ‘m dead. G’way.”

The weirdly familiar voice – a woman, one he knows, but can’t place – sounds amused at that, for some reason. Like it’s funny that he’s dead. He’s pretty sure it’s not. Sad, sure. Tragic. Bittersweet, a little. Ironic, even. But funny? That’s just rude. “All right, dead guy. Well, while you’re still talking, feel like telling me who you are and how you ended up in a secret Russian lab?”

Now that rings a bell. He bothers to crack an eye, and immediately squeezes it shut again. Neon and flashing emergency lights are a bad combination in an already-pounding head.

“Wh- happened?” he manages. He should ask about the kid, too, Joyce, the others, make sure they’re safe, but those are a lot of thoughts to form into words. And this feels like a good place to start.

The weirdly familiar voice has a weirdly familiar laugh, too. “I was kind of hoping you could tell me that. You just came stumbling out of that crack in the wall, cold-cocked the thug who was trying to stick my head in that big spinning blender, and then passed out all over the walkway.” Her voice goes a little subdued as she goes on, “You…probably saved my life.”

He’s not sure how to respond to that, so he defaults to sarcasm. “ ‘s what I do.”

She snorts out another laugh.

“Listen,” she says, after a beat or two of weirdly companionable quiet. The sounds of distant yelling and helicopter blades fill the silence, but they sound pleasantly like somebody else’s problem. And – they’ve gotta have given him something for the pain, because it’s starting to recede pleasantly too, behind a thick, insulating layer of pink cotton fluff. “You showed up with no ID, in a Russian uniform, in a secret Russian lab. None of us know you. The government’s here to clean this all up and sweep it under the rug, and unless you can tell me something really convincing about why they shouldn’t, they’re gonna sweep you right under that rug too. I don’t want that to happen. You really came through for us back there, I don’t think you’re a Russian operative.”

“ ‘m not,” he manages, around a tongue that seems to be trying to fall asleep in his mouth.

She sounds entirely too chipper as she says, “Great! Now can you tell me who you are?”

He manages to force both eyes open a sliver, turning to face her as he enunciates, as clearly as he can, “Jim Hopper. Hawkins, Indiana chief of police.”

Her face is a blur at first, cast purple in the flashing red and blue lights. But it quickly resolves into wide, stunned blue eyes, a sharp chin and cheekbones, a few dark curls escaping a tight braid. A face that’s familiar. Or would be, if it didn’t look a handful of decades too old.

He squints, but her face doesn’t change any more than her stunned expression does. “Nancy Wheeler?”

Her big eyes get, if it’s possible, even bigger at that. The twist of smile that crosses that foxy face as she nods is entirely unamused.

It’s what she says next, though, that really throws him for a loop.

“Yeah. Nancy Wheeler.” Her smile gets wider and whiter but no less disbelieving as she says, “Hawkins, Indiana chief of police.”

 …

 The stranger doesn’t stay conscious for long after that, whatever painkillers the paramedics pumped him full of finally kicking in. Nancy leaves him in the back of the ambulance and goes looking for that doctor. He’s around here somewhere.

She finds him at the mall’s service entrance, watching with a frown as the military guys he’d brought with him empty boxes and boxes full of tubes of glowing green…stuff out of the hidden elevator. Nancy hopes, vaguely, that it isn’t radioactive. That would’ve been the first thing they’d have tested. Right?

The doctor looks up as she walks up beside him, and lets out a little aggrieved sigh when he sees who it is. Nancy decides she’s taking that as a compliment. “Any word from our mystery man?”

“According to him, he’s dead.”

The doctor huffs a laugh, not taking his eyes off the elevator.

Nancy examines her fingernails. There’s blood dried in the beds. She’s not sure when that happened. “Also, according to him, he’s Jim Hopper. Hawkins, Indiana chief of police.”

She feels the doctor’s eyes on her, looks up, and smiles. “And you want to know the really weird part? I believe him.”

The doctor’s expression is inscrutable. All he says is, “You do?”

Nancy glances down at herself again, at the ill-fitting Russian uniform she’s still wearing. She can’t wait to get out of this stupid thing. She can’t wait to go home and sleep for about a month. The absolute last thing she wants right now is more supernatural weirdness to deal with.

But –

“He recognised me,” she says, slowly, putting her thoughts together as she speaks. “He knew my name. He – if you told me he was related to our Hopper, I’d believe it, the resemblance is that strong. He doesn’t sound Russian. And that – Gate, the place it goes to – that’s an alternate dimension, right? The kids’ ‘Upside Down’. It’s like here…but not.”

The doctor’s kind of smiling at her. Nancy bulls determinedly forward. “That’s one other Hawkins out there that we know about for sure. Couldn’t there be more?”

The doctor’s still giving her that smile. Nancy catches his eye and stares him down, and he sort of chuckles and shakes his head. “Sounds like we’ll make a theoretical physicist of you yet.”

“I don’t want you packing him off to some – secret bunker or lab or whatever,” Nancy says, like there’s anything she could do to stop it if the doctor did. If it comes to that, she’ll figure it out. She’s already starting to work on a few plans. But for now, she’ll give the doctor the benefit of the doubt that he’s actually trying to help, and use her words. “If the uniform’s anything to go by, he’s just had the same night from hell that we all have. Whoever he left on the other side must be missing him.”

“You’re forgetting, Chief Wheeler,” the doctor says, still sounding just a little too amused. “You and your…small army blew that machine down there to smithereens. There’s no way back into the – uh – ‘Upside Down’.”

Nancy glares back into that too-knowing look. Maybe the doctor does know Terry Ives still has the power to rip open worlds. If he doesn’t, and this is a good bluff, then no way in hell is Nancy going to be the one to tell him and start the Ives’ nightmare all over again.

“Well, if he ended up here, maybe things didn’t go so smoothly on the other end,” is all she says. “I’m sure we’ll figure something out.”

The doctor’s smile gets a little wider. But all he says is, “I’m sure. You’re a resourceful woman, Nancy Wheeler.”

Nancy watches his face, carefully, for any sign that it’s meant to be an insult. She doesn’t find one.

She leaves him to poke through the Russians’ stuff and heads back around the front of the mall. Partly because she wants to see the others – and one specific other in particular – again, make sure they’re all all right. Partly because she doesn’t want that ambulance driving off with the stranger in the back and disappearing forever.

He saved her life. The least she can do is get him home.

Jonathan’s sitting with Steve and the kids, when Nancy picks her way back through the parking lot. He looks up through his bangs, and a slow smile dawns across his face at that sight of her. Nancy feels something in her chest constrict warmly, and realises she’s smiling, too. And for once, it’s entirely real.

Yeah. If the stranger’s night’s been anything like hers – they’ve got to get him home.

Mike’s sitting in the ambulance, on one side of El, holding her hand as a paramedic washes out the nasty wound in her leg. Will, standing on her other side, has her other hand. Based on the faces all three of them are making, she’s probably grinding the bones in the boys’ hands together, but neither of them looks like they’ll be letting go any time soon. 

Karen’s perched on the ambulance’s tailgate with Joyce, sharing a shock blanket. Maxine Mayfield’s got a blanket, too, even in the hot July night, and Lucas Sinclair’s arm around her. She’s got her head on his shoulder and her arm wrapped around his waist, but her other hand is loosely holding Dustin Henderson’s, like she’s forgotten it’s there. And, even though he barely seems to notice and has gotten into some kind of good-natured argument with the crowd of kids Karen hangs around with these days, Dustin doesn’t let go of her hand either.

Everybody seems to be slowly coming down off the night’s adrenaline, still a little giggly and punchy but starting to sober up. Especially Max and Dustin, who are literally starting to sober up from whatever the Russians shot them full of. Little Phil Callahan’s nodding off against Nancy’s old college friend Kali’s knee, and Kali’s even tolerating it, though Nancy knows the eyebrow she quirks in Nancy’s direction is a clear command to get the kid off her before she stops tolerating it. Jill Stephenson also seems to be nodding off, but since she’s doing it against Benny Hammond’s muscular arm, Nancy has a sneaking suspicion it’s a put-on.

And Jim Hopper – thirteen-going-on-fourteen Jim Hopper, somehow-now-Karen’s-other-best-friend Jim Hopper, definitely-not-Hawkins-Indiana-chief-of-police Jim Hopper, is sitting with his back against Joyce Byers’ knees, listening to Joyce and Karen’s animated conversation with a half-smile that, Nancy thinks, looks an awful lot like contentment.

Nancy must have been staring, trying to mentally compare the kid in front of her to the stranger in the back of the ambulance, because he twists to shoot a scowl in her direction. “What?”

“Did you find anything out?” Jonathan asks, and Nancy can’t help another smile in his direction. Good grief, she’s going soft. “About -” He bobs his head in the direction of the other ambulance. “Him.”

Nancy looks the assembled crowd over, and settles on the truth. “He says he’s you.”

It very obviously takes Hopper a second or two to work out that everybody’s looking at him. “Wh- me?”

Nancy nods. “Jim Hopper. Hawkins, Indiana chief of police.”

There’s a moment of silence while everybody processes this, before Dustin Henderson pipes up. “What – there’s another alternate dimension out there? Other than the Upside Down?”

“Like in The Magician’s Nephew,” Will says, unexpectedly. “The Upside Down’s the wood between the worlds.”

Nancy shoots him a blank look. Karen rolls her eyes. “Mom. Narnia?”

“I thought that was about a wardrobe?”

Apparently this question is just too stupid to dignify with an answer.

Dustin, thankfully, steps in, picking up Will’s train of thought. “So you can only get into the Upside Down from any version of Hawkins -”

“But you can get into any version of Hawkins from the Upside Down,” Will agrees, nodding. He catches El’s confused squint, and shrugs. “It’s a theory.”

“Worth testing,” Nancy agrees. She goes to settle her hands on her belt, and is once again forcibly reminded that she’s still wearing the stupid Russian uniform. “Ugh! That’s it. Screw the government, I’m going back in there and looting the Gap.”

She’s not sure if Jonathan’s joking, at first, when he catches her eye and says, “Oh, but I do so love a woman in uniform.”

Joyce rolls her eyes, and Mike makes an exaggerated gagging noise. Steve shuts his eyes, giving his head a tiny shake, but he’s kind of smiling. Nancy considers flipping them all off, but she quickly decides on something else. Something better.

She crosses the distance between her and where Jonathan’s sitting on the asphalt in two big strides, and bends down to catch Jonathan’s chin in one hand. He turns his face up towards hers without her guidance, though, and when she presses her lips against his, they part with no resistance.

Nancy only holds the kiss for a moment before pulling back, but when she does, Jonathan’s red from the tips of his ears to the collar of his shirt. She allows herself a little satisfaction at that. Still got it, Wheeler. “There. Now, if you hyenas are satisfied, I’m going to go make sure the government doesn’t make our new friend vanish before we get a chance to learn anything more than his name.”

With that said, she turns and walks pointedly across the parking lot toward the other ambulance, not looking back.

She deliberately ignores the hoots, her children’s noises of disgust, and Kali’s sigh of “Finally!”

[calumance]

LA Devotee - Part X

Warnings: SO MUCH ANGER at the beginning, like I made myself mad writing it, mentions of smut, no details though

Word Count: 4.5k

Summary: Emily confronts Nathan with Calum behind her at all times. Calum thinks it’s best for Emily to stay with him knowing Nathan is in town. Even though the day started terrible, it ends magically.

A/N: Another long part, sorry! I got carried away. I hope you all enjoy! Happy reading my little berries!! Feedback and requests always welcomed!!! (Want to be notified when I post new stuff? Let me know and I’ll tag you!)

Part I | Part II | Part III | Part IV | Part V | Part VI | Part VII | Part VIII | Part IX

Masterlist

           I stomped closer to Nathan as he looked at my door and back to me with his eyebrows pulled together. “What am I doing here? Isn’t this where you live? Why are you not here?” The toothpick between his lips moved with every word that fell from his mouth. The boiling rage surging through my veins made me want to rip it out of his mouth. It was such a silly thing he started doing right after he quit smoking, he always had a toothpick in his mouth. To this day, I think that he thinks it makes him more hardcore, but really it just makes him look stupid.

           As I approached him, I poked his chest and gritted my teeth, “I don’t think that’s a question you have the right to ask. I have every right to know what the fuck you’re doing here.” Calum stood a few steps behind me, I couldn’t see him, but I could tell he was ready to pounce whenever I asked him too. Not that I thought I was going to need him too, I’ve dealt this guy for too long to need back up, but it was nice to know he was there.

           Nathan looked over my head and moved the toothpick to the other side of his mouth, causing my blood to boil even more. “Who the fuck is he?” He nodded towards Calum.

           I turned to Calum whose jaw was clenched, the muscles in his face moving in anger. Calum looked at me and silently told me that I did not have to explain myself to the man standing in front of me. As much as I liked Calum and respected what his thoughts were, it just made my anger combust. Calum’s face softened as if he could see the fire igniting in my eyes. He took a step towards me but I looked away from him and back to the idiot standing in front of me. “My boyfriend.” I spat out. Calum deserves everything in this world, not just because of how he’s treated me in the few weeks we’ve known each other, but also because of how kind his heart is. So if calling him my boyfriend to my ex-husband gives even an ounce of my undivided respect, then I’ll call him my boyfriend every fucking chance I get. “What the fuck are you doing here?” I asked again, rising to my toes as if I were about to physically bite his face off.

           “Boyfriend?” He chewed on the toothpick and looked down at me, leaning away slightly, “We got divorced, like, three months ago. You moved on that fast, huh?” He flinched towards me, causing me to back up a few inches. The fire now igniting in his own eyes. Calum took a step forward, ready to pounce. Without looking away from Nathan, I grinding my teeth and reached a hand back, stopping Calum from coming any closer.

           From all of the shit I had to deal with while we were together, I learned fairly quickly that I was not afraid of him, no matter how much he tried to intimidate me. After I was sure Calum was not coming closer, I repositioned so that I was inches away from Nathans face. My voice lowered, coming out almost in a growl, “You don’t think three months is enough time to get over a shitty person like you? I was over you long before we actually got divorced. Now, answer my question. What the fuck are you doing here?”

           Nathan’s jaw flexed as he looked between Calum and me. He took a step back, creating a small amount of space between us. He crossed his arms over his chest and moved the toothpick. My hands balled into fists as it took everything in me to not rip the stupid thing out of his mouth. “You have a few things of mine that I’ve come to get.”

           As if his words were like pouring gasoline over the fire in my body, I started to physically shake holding back my anger. “A few things?” My voice started to raise, “You took everything from me, what the fuck could I possibly have in that tiny apartment that is yours?” I wasn’t wasting time now, especially since I could hear my neighbors starting to poke their head out and figure out what was going on. I shoved my way past Nathan and opened the door to my apartment. The door slammed against the wall inside causing everyone, but me, to flinch. I stood in the middle of the apartment and spread my arms and hands out, “Go at it! Fucking take whatever it is that you’re looking for. Take it all, it’s not like you left me with anything in the first place.” Nathan stood where he was, his jaw flexing and looking into the small apartment. Just as fast as the fire ignited, it was extinguished and I chuckled. My anger suddenly turning into hysterical laughing as I realized that he wasn’t actually here because I had something of his. He was here to see how I was doing. “Oh fucking Christ.” I said through manic laughing. As I turned on my toes, I threw my clothes that I had brought back from Calum’s house onto the couch.

           Nathan finally crossed through the doorway, Calum following behind him, closing the door knowing it would drown out a little bit of the noise so the neighbors would stop coming out. Calum positioned himself by leaning against the door, his hands shoved in his pockets, his eyes locked on every movement I made. I ran my hands back through my hair until I stopped where the hair tie sat. My hands dropped to my sides with a slap and then I held my arms out again, looking at Nathan. “Since you’re here just to see how ‘terrible’ I’m doing, here you go. Here’s my apartment, it’s small, but it’s livable. I’ll admit that I wasn’t doing great, I wasn’t. You fucking destroyed me Nathan. But you know what, that man behind you, is the best thing that has happened to me. He’s helping me overcome what you did to me, and is even helping me build myself back up.” Nathan eyes looked down, but he didn’t look at Calum. “So, if you’re here to see how terrible I’m doing without you, then just leave, because I’m doing great.”

           As if on que, Calum opened the door, causing Nathan to look behind him. Nathan looked back at me, hesitating for a second, then left without a single word. Calum shut the door, and I could feel my breath hitch in my throat. The anger coursing through my veins causing my breath to be labored. I could feel my chest rising and falling with every passing second. The lock clicked as Calum turned the deadbolt and my vision became fuzzy, as if I were coming down from some sort of high. I stood in the spot I was standing in, tears welling up in my eyes. Calum hurriedly came over to me, gently placing his hands on either side of my face. The feeling of his hands on my skin caused me to come undone, my tough exterior finally breaking. The tears poured down my cheeks, and the anger turned into absolute hysteria. “How did he find out where I live? The lawyer told me he wouldn’t have access to my new address. Why did he come here? What did I do to deserve that, all of this?” My hands shook as they found their way to Calum’s shirt, balling the material in my fingers as if that were the last thing I ever had to hold onto it. My chest heaved as I felt like I couldn’t breathe anymore.

           Calum tried everything to get me to look into his eyes, calling my name over and over. Once his voice broke through the static in my ears, I looked into his eyes, “Honey, you did nothing wrong. Everything that you just did was perfect, he had no right coming here just to get satisfaction off your pain. You are an amazing, strong woman and none of this is your fault, okay?” I nodded in his hands, my breathing still labored. He used his thumb to wipe the tears off my cheek. “Maybe you should stay with me a few nights, just until we know he’s no longer in town. I’ll help you grab whatever you need.” I agreed with a nod and Calum pulled me into his chest, holding me there until I was able to catch my breath. My fingers unraveled from his shirt and I started walking down the hallway. Calum followed me into my bedroom. I found a duffle bag in my closet and grabbed a few days of clothes. He went into my bathroom and I opened my bottom drawer and caught sight of the papers. I grabbed them and sat on the floor holding them in my fingers. Calum came out of the bathroom, stopping when he saw me on the floor. “Are you okay, sunshine?”

           I sniffed and shook the papers a little, my eyes not leaving the papers. “I’m sorry I brought you into this mess. I don’t understand why you’re still here.” I pulled my knees to my chest and threw the papers down next to me. As the papers landed, they made a slap, I shook my head, “Not that I’m complaining, I just would’ve run a long time ago if I were in your shoes.” My eyes diverted from the papers, but still not landing on Calum, ashamed that somehow he fell into my mess. I placed my elbows on my knees and pressed my palms to my face, slowly moving the backwards through my hair.

           I could hear Calum’s footsteps as he moved through the room. Calum sat in front of me, wrapping his hands around the back of my shins. “Never once have I thought about running. So, you have a shitty ex-husband, so what? That doesn’t stop any of the feelings I have for you.” I wanted him to elaborate, maybe hearing him spill his heart to me would make this day better, but I kept my mouth shut, it’s not the right time. He lifted one hand to my cheek and I closed my eyes, leaning into his touch. When I opened my eyes, his eyes locked on mine. His eyes were soft and his lips were barely curled into a soft smile. I couldn’t help myself, I crawled into Calum’s lap, and pressed my lips against his. His hand wrapped around my head and after his lips left mine, they placed a soft peck to my forehead before he placed my head on his shoulder. My arms snaked around his torso and gripped the back of his shirt. How was I lucky enough to meet him in the club two weeks ago?

           After a few minutes of sitting in Calum’s lap, I finished grabbing some clothes and shoes. Calum took my bag from me and set it on his shoulder as I turned and locked my apartment. After I turned around, I was met with Calum reaching his hand out, asking for mine. I grabbed his hand and he interlocked his fingers with mine. A smile sat on my lips, and I thought solely about the fact that I loved holding his hand. My entire life, I’ve been a hand-holder. I’d hold my friend’s hands, my mom’s hand, basically anyone who would let me hold their hand. My ex-husband hated holding hands. If we ever held hands, it was for a minute and then he’d let go. He’d never brush his hand against mine and then grab my fingers. Ever since Calum and I have met and become comfortable with each other, he’s offered to hold my hand. I loved the feeling of his hand in mine, it was like our hands were just meant to be together.

           Calum put my bag in the back seat of his car as I climbed into the passenger seat. He started the car and started driving back to his house. As promised, Calum stopped at Starbucks on the way back to his house. When we ordered, I told him that I order the same drink every single time I’m at Starbucks. “I’ll keep that in mind.” He told me with a sly smile. As he drove away from Starbucks, I took a drink of the heavenly liquid, my eyes nearly rolling into the back of my head. It’s been such a long time since I’ve gone to a Starbucks that I forgot how much I loved it.

           When we got back to his house, I stayed quiet. It was still rather early in the day, but it has already been absolutely exhausting. Calum had my bag over his shoulder and told me he was going to take it to his bedroom. As he started to walk down the hall, my eyes locked on the swimming pool in his backyard. The water was barely moving, but it was sparkling in the sunlight, suddenly my skin craved the feeling of the cool water.  “Can we go swimming?” I ask him, pointing towards his backyard.

           He turned for a second and smiled, “Anything you want.” He kept walking towards his bedroom and I followed him. When we got into his room, I grabbed my swim suit that I had thrown into my bag as an afterthought and went into the bathroom to change. After I slipped my suit on, I looked at myself in the mirror. Swim suits were my worst enemy. It’s always so hard to find one that looks good, feels good, and fits right. Most of the girls I know own multiple swim suits, I own one, this one. It’s easily five years old and starting to show it’s age, but I hate shopping for swim suits so much that I can never bring myself to find another one. I ran my finger over my brow ridge and reached down to pull on a pair of shorts and a tank top. After I tugged on my tank tap, I grabbed the door knob and left the bathroom.

           Calum wasn’t in his room when I came out of the bathroom. I slid on my flip flops and made my way down the hallway. Just as I rounded the corner, I caught sight of Calum. He was kicking his sandals off and I took a few more steps towards the door. When he reached over his head and pulled his shirt over his head, I stopped dead in my tracks, my eyes taking in every detail of his skin. His back muscles flexed, and his dark skin glowed in the sunshine. He turned to grab his towel off the table and set it down on his chair. His pecks flexed with the movements and I eyed his tattoos that covered random spots on his chest and arms. It was like I was in a trance as I walked out the back door, eyes still locked on his body.

           He smiled at me, causing me to shake my head to come out of my trance. He plunged into the water as I kicked my sandals off next to his. He popped out of the water and started to float on his back, his eyes were closed. After I looked away from him, I stripped out of my tank top and shorts, then slowly dipped into the water. The water barely moved, and there was barely any sound, but Calum opened one eye to look my direction. Just as he caught sight of me, he swam over to me, wrapping his arms around my waist, pulling me so that my chest was touching his. The feeling of his fingers running along my bare skin made my stomach flip, and a tightness in the pit of my stomach that I hadn’t felt in a long time. I bit my bottom lip as I wrapped my arms around his neck. He pressed a gentle kiss to my lips then rested his forehead on mine, “Have I ever told you how beautiful you are?”

           I shook my head, “I mean, you always tell me I look nice.”

           He let out a breath that resembled a laugh, “That’s my sneaky way of telling you the you’re beautiful.” He kissed my nose and I let out a breathy laugh. I lifted my hand from his neck and ran my hands through his thick blonde hair. His eyes shut and a soft, quiet groan left his chest. My stomach tightened and suddenly I suddenly felt like I had no control over my actions. My fingers rested on the back on his neck and I pressed a needy kiss to his lips, taking a breath in. His arms wrapped tighter around my waist as the kiss deepened. Without thinking, I wrapped my legs around Calum’s waist. One of his hands was pressed to my lower back, the other pressed between my shoulder blades. He moved us through the water and in one swift motion, he moved his hands from my back and my back touched the wall. Once my back was pressed against the wall, his hands moved out of the water and grabbed the sides of my face.

           I took a breath and pulled away from him, my breathing was heavy. My eyes flickered between both of his trying to see if he was thinking the same thing I was thinking. His pupils were dilated and the brown in his eyes had gotten darker. “Is everything okay, love?” He asked, letting out a breath afraid he had done something to over step a boundary.

           I nodded, licking my lips. “I just wanted to see if I could figure out what is going through your mind.” I ran my fingers through his hair again and his eyes turned black.

           His eyes closed and another groan left his throat. “Honey, I don’t think you want to know what’s going through my mind.” Even though I could take a wild guess, I still wanted to hear him say it. His lips met my neck and my entire core tightened.

           There was literally a million words to describe what was going through my head. None of it being family friendly. “Tell me,” I sighed, “I want to know what’s going through your mind.”

           His lips left my neck, trailing up my jaw and to my lips. After he pressed a deep kiss to my lips he pulled back and smirked, “Can I show you, instead?” I nodded frantically. My breath hitched in my throat as he slowly leaned towards me. I felt paralyzed as a devilish smirk grew across his lips and he whispered, “Just tell me to stop if you want me to stop.” I agreed and his lips crashed onto mine again.

           I took a breath, feeling my stomach tighten more. His hand traveled down my face, down my arm, and then finally settled under my thigh, just under where my leg met my butt cheek. My hand ran down his chest resting gently on his stomach. His tongue gently slid along my bottom lip, I parted my lips and he took full advantage of it. The hand that was resting gently on my thigh, moved up and squeezed the exposed skin. My reflexes caused me to groan into his mouth. His hand moved to my hip where the tie of my swim bottoms were. Calum pulled away from me, “You promise me you’ll tell me if you want me to stop?” I knew what I was doing, and I knew what he was doing.

           “I promise, Calum.” He looked at me with another devilish smirk and my heart skipped a beat. With a nod, he lifted me out of the pool, setting me on the edge, before climbing out next to me. As he stood up, I eyed him up and down, my bottom lip settling between my teeth. He held out a hand for me and I grabbed it. He pulled me up and pressed his lips to mine again. I jumped, wrapping my legs around his waist, not letting our lips disconnect. He carried me into his house, pulling at the strings on my swim suit top and letting the wet material slop onto the floor. Just as Calum crossed the threshold of his bedroom, he kicked the door shut with his foot.

           I was laying on his left side, tracing the quill tattoo on his collar bone. His breath still slightly heavy. With my head pressed to his chest, I could hear his heartbeat. In the past few minutes, it has slowed from the rapid pace it was right after we finished. He kissed my forehead and took a deep breath. “I’m going to take a shower. Do you want to go get some lunch after I get out?” His fingers raked through my hair and I sighed at the feeling of his touch.

           I lifted my head to look at him, “Can I take a shower with you?” He smiled and nodded. I smiled back at him. He threw the comforter off himself and I watched him walk into the bathroom. I followed after him a second later. When I entered into the bathroom, he was already in the shower. My teeth sank into my bottom lip, still trying to figure out if the last hour and half actually happened. This felt like a dream, like I was going to wake up in my own bed, boxes still piled to the ceiling in my apartment, and the crushing weight still sitting on my chest.

           “You coming, love?” He asked, proving that this wasn’t a dream, and I was indeed about to share a shower with the man I am convinced was made just for me. When I stepped into the shower, his hand immediately grabbed onto my waist, and his lips immediately found mine. My knees felt weak as his fingertips sunk further into my skin as soon as I wrapped my arms around his neck. His hand landed on the wall behind me just as my back pressed against the cold tile. I gasped in surprise, and Calum laughed before he pressed his body against mine, my skin igniting at the feeling of his on mine. I dragged my fingernails down the back of his neck and he leans his head away from me with a groan, “Fuck, girl, what are you doing to me?” His eyes locking with mine. Just as I smirk he bends down and wraps his arms under my legs so I can wrap them around his waist as he presses his body onto mine for another round.

           We finally find the ability to separate from each other and finish our shower. I watched Calum as he got dressed, memorizing the muscles in his back. He turned toward me, holding a t-shirt in his hands, a smile flashing across his lips. As he pulled it over his head, I smiled to myself and looked at the tank top in my hands. “Can we just order some lunch in?” I asked as I pulled the tank top down and situated it so that it was comfortable.

           “Sure, anything sound good to you?” I shook my head and he grabbed his phone to search for something to order. I followed him into his living room and we talked through what to order. Once the order was placed, his phone started to ring. “I’m sorry, darling, I have to take this. I’ll be right back.” As he answered, I could tell it was about work. He closed the door to his music room and I glanced at my phone. My fingers wrapped around it as I gripped it and typed out a message to Mikayla, “Two weeks, it took two weeks for me to give in to how attracted I am to him. Am I a whore for having sex with a guy I met two weeks ago?”

           My eyes flashed down the hallway waiting for Mikayla to respond. I could see Calum’s shadow under the door as he paced back and forth. My phone vibrated and I read her response, “You should be proud of yourself for waiting two weeks. If I were you, I would’ve jumped his bones the first night. Tell me everything on Monday. Love you!” I chuckled under my breath and put my phone in my pocket. After I saw Calum’s shadow pass by the door again, I walked outside and sat in a chair next to the pool. The water had settled from us, and the sun hit it as only a few ripples rocked through the water. I pulled my knees to my chest and I placed my chin on top of my knees.

           The sound of the door sliding opened caused me to turn around. “Sorry about that, love.” Calum was holding two glasses of water, and he handed me one of them. “Are you alright?” He asked as he sat in the chair next to mine.

           “Yeah, I’m alright.” I took the glass he offered me, my thoughts rush back to his phone call from the night we met. “Can I ask you something?” He took a long drink of his water and nodded. “The first night you brought me here, I heard you talking on the phone. You said something about this being different. Were you talking about me?”

           He laughed obviously remembering the conversation. “I was. Michael had called me to remind me about being at the studio early the next morning and not to stay out too late. When I told him that I was already home, he asked me if I had brought someone home with me. I told him I had, but this was different, I meant that you were different, which you are.” He raised his eyebrows and set the glass down on the table between us.

           My eyebrows raised as I brought the edge of the glass to my lips, “Do you tend to bring a lot of girls home from the club?” I wasn’t asking to judge him, he hasn’t judged me on any of my past endeavors, I was more curious than anything.

           He shrugged, “I guess you could say I’m a ladies man, but that’s in the past. I found you.” He stretched his arm over the table and flexed his fingers, asking for my hand. With a smile, I placed my hand in his. He brought my fingers to his lips before he squeezed and wrapped his fingers with mine. His doorbell rang and he let go of my hand to go answer it. We ate lunch together by the pool, afterwards finding ourselves on the couch. His back pressed against the arm of the couch, his right leg outstretched on the couch, his left leg bent and his foot planted on the ground. My head rested against his stomach, arms wrapped around his torso. His fingers absentmindedly ran through my hair. My eyes fluttered shut, thinking of how amazing it felt to be wrapped around him.

[shes-soparticular]

Slow Burn (Part IV)

Part One. Part Two.

Part Three.

A/N: Part IV of Slow Burn. If you can tell, Kraków is one of my favorite cities and felt like a great point for this particular chapter. Other Alex related one-shots can be found in my Masterlist. Hope you like! Comments, reblogs, likes are always appreciated!

Word Count: 3890

For fear of moments stolen I don't wanna say goodnight But I'll still see you in the morning Still know your heart and still know both your eyes

Since that night the moon has never seemed the same

 He wakes up to the faint smell of coconut and a tingling sensation in his left arm. For a split second, the daily feeling of disorientation takes over him as he processes that he’s in yet another hotel room, in yet another country, living this incredibly strange existence. But there’s something different about this morning in particular. The smell of coconut is floating from the head of hair his face is practically buried in, the curls tickling his nose as he tries to take in the scent as deeply as possible and commit it to memory. The state of discomfort in his arm is owed to the fact that it’s nestled under her ribcage, his other arm draped over her stomach with fingers splayed over the skin underneath the t-shirt she’s sleeping in. His t-shirt. Even though his left arm is begging for relief, he doesn’t dare move a muscle. He knows as soon as he does, as soon as she wakes, the moment might be ripped away and brushed under the rug. So for now, for as long as he can, he’s going to breathe her in and relish being pressed against her in the early morning glow. Laying in the silence, basking in it, he lets his mind replay the prior evening. The bandage on the back of her shoulder jogs his memory and immediately takes him back to Kraków’s cobblestoned streets, the moonlight reflecting off of the windows of storefronts long since closed for the night.

 They move through the streets slowly, cheeks warm from the Polish Vodka they’d been nursing since the end of that night’s show. A piece of street stall zapiekanka passes back and forth between the two of them, which Alex had spent half the night on the hunt for. When the rest of the group had slowly started breaking off to head back to the hotel in preparation for the early morning drive to Vienna, he had been the one to convince her to stay out just a little longer. Even though he was often mesmerized by her for the simplest of reasons, there was something about Kraków Alex that was more intoxicating than even the vodka. She’d been mentioning since the beginning of tour how much she loved this city, stars in her eyes anytime she spoke about it. But it was different actually watching her wander through Kazimierz and Old Town with her eyes wide, fingers brushing across the brick buildings and taking it all in with nostalgia as if it were a home she’d never known. It was yet another facet of her he hadn’t seen yet, this childlike wonderment, and it only softened his heart for her more. As if it wasn’t already a hopeless puddle anytime she was in front of him. Not wanting to sacrifice a second of watching the flush in her cheeks as the spring night air swept through her hair, he insisted on not letting the night end. Even as the rest of the team, Andrew included, shot him discerning looks on their way out of the final bar, all he could do was shrug his shoulders from behind Alex’s back. It was next to impossible to be rational and lovesick at the same time.

“God, I don’t know what it is about this city,” She sighs to herself, arm tucked through his as they strolled through Old Town. The moon, bigger and brighter than he’d ever seen it, lit their way and reflected off of her eyes as she looked up to him. “I wish we had more time here, I don’t want to leave.” It was clear to him that she was trying to stretch the night out as desperately as he was. There was no other reason she’d still be out in the middle of the night with no destination in mind.

“I know, I can’t believe we’re almost through with Europe.” His forlorn sigh matches hers as they weave past a couple necking on the sidewalk. He and Alex share a momentary smile at the couple’s expense, but there’s an undercurrent of jealousy that they aren’t the ones pushed up against the city walls, lost in one another. Granted, even if they were simply, innocently arm in arm, Shawn still feels as lost in her as if they were tangled in the sheets. “I’m dreading the end of this leg. I’m not ready.” With a rush of nerves, he looked off into the distance, not wanting to make the loaded nature of his statement any more obvious. Because what he was trying to say, what he really meant, was that he wasn’t ready to leave her. Even if it was just for a couple of months, he couldn’t imagine not seeing her every day. Breakfast wouldn’t be the same without listening to her tease Brian. His afternoons wouldn’t be the same without her forcing a smile out of him by asking in a dead serious tone if he ever planned to collaborate with BTS. And the nights? God, the nights definitely wouldn’t be the same. Not without laying across her bed watching her proudly show off her bad dance moves to Lizzo songs. Or listening to her geek out over Game of Thrones theories. He wouldn’t even get tired of the sinking feeling he got every time he caught that last glimpse of her face before her hotel room door shut in front of him. Although, he was certain he’d continue seeing her face nightly anytime he closed his eyes. Nothing was going to match having her in the room, though. The comfort of just knowing she was there and that was enough for all to be right with his world. He just wasn’t ready for anything to change, not in that way at least. What he didn’t realize was that there were plenty of similar thoughts running through her mind at that very moment. She didn’t want to miss out on those sweaty post-show bear hugs, where she’d never felt more at home than wrapped up in his arms. She wasn’t prepared to give up their nightly ramblings about everything and nothing. She was even going to miss bickering with him about the right way to chop vegetables (she truly feared he’d be missing a finger by the time June rolled around). Alex was just as afraid to let this moment in time pass and face the real world again, without one of his smiles to start her day.

“We’ll be running around North America before you know it.” Alex replies with as reassuring a tone as she can muster, rubbing his arm for added comfort. “And you have some exciting stuff coming up in May, I’m already planning my SNL watch party. I’m going to make everyone take a shot if you say, “sing it!”. Two shots if you forget the words. Three shots if you fall.” At the look of offense on his face, she hides in his shoulder, her laugh vibrating against his arm.

“Maybe I am ready to be Alex-free for a little while.” Shawn scoffs, shaking his head but secretly eating up her mocking. “I’m glad to hear you believe in me, feels great.” He still can’t help but laugh along with her. When so many people line up to kiss your ass, it’s always a breath of fresh air to hear from someone who doesn’t mind poking fun. Who can keep you grounded. “What are you going to be up to with your time off?”

She takes a beat to consider the question, obviously not having as impressive of an answer. “I don’t know, I mean, I’ll be back in the office.” It’s easy for him to forget that she has a real job, one with a desk and a cubicle and probably one of those “hang in there” posters with a kitten on it. And far more likely, a bottle of Maker’s Mark in her desk drawer. “I have a lot of contracting to do for a few fall tours, but I should be able to handle all of that from Chicago. I guess I’ll just be hanging out, back to the boring old grind. Gonna be tough to go back to civilian life.”

Continuing their aimless walk, the sound of a busker strumming away on his guitar fills the air. Neither of them recognizes the song, but it’s soft and sweet and only makes his hands itch to pull her in. Not letting himself hesitate any longer, he grabs her hand and gives her a sloppy spin into his chest, grinning at the way he’s managed to catch her off guard. Being that she had more of an impulsive streak than he did, it wasn’t an easy feat. A giggle leaves her lips as she lets herself lean into him, the hand that isn’t in his moving to his shoulder. “I guess I should ask first, if you want to dance.”

He’s fully expecting a snarky response from her, something just sharp enough to keep his ego in check but still kind enough not to bruise it. Surprisingly, all she does is look up at him, the moon lighting her features. “I’d love to.” Her hand brushes further across his upper back, settling on the nape of his neck. It sends shivers down his spine and he can’t decide whether he wants her to notice what she does to him. However, the way she’s melting into him? He’s confident the feeling is mutual. That maybe he isn’t exaggerating this connection between them. Maybe she’s in as deep as he is. They keep swaying together in the empty street, even after the busker starts packing up to leave. He imagines that had neon lights not caught the eyes of this spontaneous girl, that they’d have kept right on dancing until sunrise.

“Hey, I have an idea.” She squeezes his hand, already biting her lip the way she does when a scheme is turning it’s wheels through her brain. “Come with me.” Reluctantly, he drops his hand from her waist, trailing behind her as she takes off with purpose towards one of the few windows that’s still lit up. When he finally takes his eyes off of her long enough to judge the place she’s whisking him towards, he realizes with a chuckle that it’s a tattoo parlor of all places. While it’s true he hasn’t known Alex for long, he knows her well enough to be a little jittery about her plans. When they make their way into the small shop, he stands back and lets her do the talking. He watches as she digs through her purse for her phone, quickly bringing up a picture of a floral sketch she’d already had saved. Listening intently to her rambling, the artist starts drawing out his own version, a small branch of cherry blossoms. He already knew she had several existing tattoos, mostly small and simple. A sailboat on her inner ankle to represent her life growing up on Lake Michigan. A small mountain range on the back of her arm that she’d gotten after spending the summer between high school and college hiking Pacific Crest Trail with friends. The doodle made by her late grandmother dotting her right wrist was her favorite, and the way tears had welled up in the corner of her eyes when she explained it to him made him want to hold her and never let go. In the scavenger hunts to uncover her existing tattoos, she’d never mentioned having another one planned. But clearly, based on the photos saved to her phone, it’s something she’d been thinking deeply about. Being that he’s lost in his own thoughts of her, he almost doesn’t hear her when she turns to him, asking his opinion. “I think under the branch, he should add the words ‘let’s get lost’, what do you think?” The way her eyes flash this vulnerable look she only seems to have when she’s looking at him, he instantly understands the meaning without having to ask. It’s his lyric. A lyric to the first song she ever saw him play live. A lyric that easily represented the way they’d been stumbling together through Europe, falling harder for one another in each new city.

“Really?” There’s this weird sense of pride and humility that fills him, to know that a piece of their time together, a piece of him, was important enough to her that she wanted it to be emblazoned on her body. “I love it, Alex, I really do.” This earns the biggest smile he’s seen from her yet and somehow, he’s never been this tempted to kiss her. Even though that’s the baseline feeling he has every time he wants to kiss her…which is pretty much constant.

Before long, the artist has the design prepared and the stencil complete. For a moment, Shawn is nervous that she’ll want him to wait for her out front. But there’s something about her going off with a stranger that’s going to inflict a certain amount of pain on her that makes him immediately protective. Fortunately, she grabs his hand without hesitation and pulls him along with her to the back of the shop, not letting go as she lays chest down on the cushioned table. Leaning on her elbows for a second, she shimmies down the straps of her dress and bra, leaving her right shoulder bare. She does have to let go of his hand briefly to accomplish this, but quickly grasps it again as soon as she’s finished. When she blows out a shaky breath, he realizes she’s more anxious than he expected. Squeezing her hand as the artist makes the final preparations and applies the stencil, he gives her the same reassuring smile she’d flashed him earlier in the evening.

“So how long have you been thinking about getting this tattoo? You never mentioned it.” He wants to hear the answer almost as much as he wants to keep her mind occupied as the tattoo gun makes it’s first contact with her skin. When she winces, he almost can’t bear it. Seeing her in pain, even at her own request, stings in a way he almost can’t understand. But she’s resolute and manages a smile through the pain.

“Oh, I don’t know, a month or so, I guess?” Alex bites her lip, but it’s out of exposing herself rather than the physical pain. “I’ve been having the time of my life.” This time, she squeezes his hand instead. “I never want to forget it.” He doesn’t even think before reaching up with his free hand to brush her hair back, thumb brushing against her cheek and resting there too long to be considered innocent. They sit in silence for awhile, interrupted only by the sound of the tattoo gun, until the artist announces that he’s finished the line work and ready to start shading the flowers. Clearly picking up on the tender moment between them, a gleam enters the older man’s eyes.

“You know, I never do this,” He chuckles in a thick polish accent, “But would you like to fill in the flowers? I’ll tell you what to do, very easy.” He says this with confidence, as if it’s no big deal to jab a needle into someone’s skin. Especially someone you’re falling head over heels for. To say Shawn is caught off guard is an understatement. No way in hell does he trust himself to do this, to anyone, much less Alex. But the way her face lights up, brighter than when it was awash in moonlight, he knows there’s no way he can get out of it.

“Yes, Shawn, please.” She whines, knowing it’ll be an uphill battle to convince him. The look of determination in her eyes tells him that even if he fights her on this, tooth and nail, he’s going to lose. Now it’s him taking a shaky breath, running a hand through his hair while racking his brain for an excuse that will appease her. Unfortunately, nothing comes to mind.

“Are you absolutely sure? What if I hurt you? What if I fuck it up?” He rattles on, hand still snuggly grasped in hers. “Alex, this will be on your skin for the rest of your life. You need to be sure.”

At his reluctance, she raises to her elbows again for a second, wanting to be even the littlest bit closer to him. “Shawn, I’m sure. You won’t hurt me, you won’t fuck it up. Even if you do, I’d rather have it be your mistake than someone else’s best work.” She lowers her voice at the last part, not wanting to offend the artist that still has a certain amount of her fate in his hands. “If you’re not comfortable doing it, that’s totally okay. I get it. But I’d love it if you did.” Will he ever be able to say no to this woman? Taking one last nervous breath, Shawn accepts the gun from the artist and listens carefully to his instructions, asking him to repeat multiple points before he feels confident enough to move forward. It takes one last soothing look from Alex before he’s finally ready to bring the needle to the skin of her shoulder. Unexpectedly, he feels her relax instantly under his touch. The tension leaves her shoulders, melts from her back. The mere fact that she trusts him to do this, that she wants him to leave this permanent mark on her, something that might outlast them. Something that will be a part of her until her dying day. His imprint on her for a lifetime.

Through some miracle, he’s able to finish filling in the petals as instructed without making any mistakes or causing her an undue amount of pain. For a second, he almost thinks she’s drifted off to sleep before he’s finished, with the way she’s relaxed beneath his hand. But after the tattoo artist takes over to finish some final touches and wrap her tattoo, her eyes flutter open with a look of contentment. He feels her gratitude without her having to say a word, and he hopes she feels his. For letting him in like this, for sharing this moment with him. It’s so strange how something as simple of a tattoo can make him feel so bound to her, which is both euphoric and terrifying all at once.

It’s not long before they’ve finished up and are cast back on to the streets, the back of her shoulder bandaged and their hands interlocked once more. She goes back to leaning into him with her good shoulder and by the time they’re in the elevator up to their rooms, he doesn’t think twice about planting a kiss on the crown of her head. Even if they never go any further, they’ll always have this night. And it alone means the world to him.

They pass his door first and he’s surprised when she comes to a stop. It’s part of their routine that he always walks her back to her room first. “I…” Alex stammers for a second, eyes flicking between him and the door. “I don’t want to sleep alone tonight. Can I…can I stay with you?” The pleading look she’s giving him isn’t even necessary, he wonders if she knows that, if she has any idea that he’d do anything for her. Without a thought. He’s aware how dangerous that could be, but so far, if it just boils down to tattoos and sleepovers, he’s more than ready to give her anything she wants.

“Of course.” He fumbles with the room key momentarily before getting them both inside. While he would have expected there to be an awkward tension in the air, there’s a comfortable familiarity instead. The way they maneuver around each other as they get ready for bed, it’s what he imagines a seasoned married couple is able to do. Except that he respectfully turns around as she changes into the t-shirt he’s tossed her, her boyshorts peeking out from under the bottom once he faces her. That sight alone is enough to make him blush, which he knows is a tad pathetic considering he’s not fourteen.

“Which side?” She asks as she glides towards the end of the bed, debating where to crawl in.

“Count of three?” He crosses his arms with a playful grin, earning one right back from her.

“Okay, one, two, three,” She counts off on her fingers before they both announce their preference. For once, their disagreement works in their favor as he says left and she says right. One more check in the mental “pro” column he’s been logging. He waits for her to crawl in and get comfortable before flipping off the light and crawling in after her. Not wanting to assume this is more than it is, he settles directly on to his back, leaving plenty of space between them across the king sized bed.

“You know, I can take the couch if you want, it’s actually super comfortable,” He has absolutely no clue if it’s comfortable or not…actually, he’s not even sure he’s picturing the right hotel room and couldn’t say for certain that there’s even a couch in the room at all.

“No, please stay.” Her voice is soft, the playfulness replaced ever so slightly with the same softness that was present during their impromptu dance. “Unless you want to, I mean, I don’t want to force you to cuddle with me. Please don’t feel obligated.” The way she sounds seriously concerned, as though she’s the one that’s overstepped, causes him to chuckle louder than intended.

“Cuddle? You didn’t say anything about that…” He inches closer to her, almost an unnoticeable distance, still reluctant to take a mile if she only means to give an inch.

“Shawn, I let you poke me with needles, I think you owe me a little TLC,” She rolls closer to him until they’re nearly touching.

“Okay, that does not get to be a thing you say to people by the way, you asked me to. Begged.” He can see her pout lip even in the darkness of the room, and just like in the elevator, his body moves faster than his mind as he pulls her into his chest. “But I’m glad you did. I hope you like the final result, it’s going to be there forever.” He’s beyond relieved when she settles into him, nuzzling her face into his neck, arm draping over his hip.

“I love it.” Her words are the last thing either of them hears before they succumb to sleep. Wrapped in one another in a way that they know they shouldn’t be but can no longer resist.

 Which is what makes it that much fucking worse when the first face to greet them in the lobby of their Viennese hotel is that of a guy he’s seen only in Facebook photos and Instagram posts. A guy he frankly hoped he’d never see in person. Of course, he is tired as hell and probably not seeing clearly, so he’s fully prepared to ignore the dude entirely. That is until he hears the quaking of Alex’s voice next to him.

“Ethan? What are you doing here?”

A/N #2: Okay, yes, this was inspired by a tattoo I got last night. Check my blog for a picture of the fresh product, that’s basically what Alex got ;) Art imitates life, right?

[thelangdoncooperative]

Scary Love

Homecoming (Repost due to Tumblr’s dumb rules)

Two days later, Jim was in a 7-day detox program. Most of the time, he spent it sweating out every last piece of shit he had ingested. He couldn't sleep. His body was on fire. He was sweating but he was shivering. His body ached and, if he was being honest, he thought he was there to die. As the time passed, he felt better. They gave him pamphlets for longer rehab stays. They pumped him with an IV of fluids when he couldn't hold down any food. On the second to last day, Michael was finally able to convince them to allow Y/N to visit although she wasn't technically family.

When she walked into the room, Jim’s face lit up and he sat up in his bed.

“Hi Jimmy” she spoke low, voice thick with the tears she was holding back. He let her pet his hair for a brief moment before he pulled her in, holding her as tight as he could.

Michael smiled at their reunion and only spoke up when Y/N let out a sound that signaled her struggle for air, “Jim, let her breathe” he chuckled.

“Sorry” Jim laughed as he let her go. She sat beside him on the bed as he held her face, not saying much of anything.

She couldn't help but smile back, her face hurting from how much smiling she was doing, “Jimmy, you look so good,” she ran her finger down his nose before poking it.

���Thank you for everything,” he turned to Michael, “you too,”

Michael moved to stand beside his brother, gently patting his shoulder, “Anything. That's what a tribe does,”

Y/N had heard of their tribe before but to be in it was something else. To hear them say it made her heart soar, “You come home tomorrow. How do you feel about that?”

“Good,” he nodded, “I wanna get back to the water,”

Y/N smiled up at Michael before rubbing Jim’s thigh as she spoke, “One thing at a time. Do you have the energy?”

“Never felt better,”

“Okay,” she leaned in, pressing a kiss to the corner of his mouth, “if the doctor says it's okay than we can go,” she paused and frowned, “Where does your mother think you are?”

“Visiting me,” Michael said, “The only way she'd let him out of her sight,”

Y/N rolled her eyes at the thought of that insufferable woman. She stayed at Jim’s bedside for as long as they let her. She held his hand while he watched TV or spoke to Michael. She couldn't stop touching him in some way. While he was away, she craved being near him. It was the longest they had been apart since they met. Of course, Michael gave her updates every day when he came back from visiting but it wasn't the same.

“Jimmy, I've got to go,” she said as she stood and he shook his head.

“Stay. Who cares what they say?” He waved his hand dismissively at the nurses station.

Y/N laughed, “I care,” she hugged him once more, kissing his forehead, “I'm so happy to see my Jim again,” he lifted his face up and caught her cheek for a kiss. She smiled and looked at Michael as she left.

She waited in the hall, a few doors down, for Michael. She hugged him tight, releasing a breath she didn't know she was holding. She quickly wiped her eyes, “He looks so good. I haven't seen that much color in his face in so long,”

“He still has a long way to go,” Michael reminded her, tucking hair behind her ear.

She nodded in understanding, “I know but...still” she made a move to turn and then stopped, turning back to him, “When you're out of here, would you like to have dinner?”

Michael seemed surprised by the offer, “Uhm...yeah. Okay. Visiting hours usually end at 7,”

“So 7:30?…” she bit her lip and smiled when he nodded.

----

Michael was surprised that she wanted to drive. She had texted him she was outside his hotel at exactly 7:30. There was something to be said about her punctuality. Hanging out with Jim as much as she did he was surprised she had any at all.

He headed out of his hotel and found her Jeep parked right in front. She seemed a bit nervous the way she wouldn't meet his eyes and kept tapping on the steering wheel whenever they were stopped at a light. When they finally got to the restaurant he was finally about to really appreciate the girl in front of him. Her white cotton dress was a tad sheer and he could just make out the shape of her body underneath. Her hair was piled up on her head in a bun and the way a few strands came out and framed her face only added to her beauty.

He only looked at her as the waiter read them the specials and Y/N swallowed a chuckle when she caught him. When they were finally alone he asked the question he had been wanting to ask all day.

“If I may, why did you ask me to dinner?” He folded his hands on the table.

“Because we’ve been through a lot with Jim the last two weeks and I thought it would be nice,” she explained. He could see that she was biting down on the inside of her cheek.

“That's all? Just because of Jim?” He raised an eyebrow.

She opened her mouth and sighed when the words didn't come, “Michael, I-...I don't know what you want me to say,”

“I think you do,” He said nonchalantly as he turned the pages of the menu.

She reached over the table, putting her hand over his, “I like being with you. I like when you're home or when I go see you,” he could see how hard it was for her to admit what she was saying, “It feels sorta like I'm betraying Jim when I do,”

“You're not dating Jim,” Michael reminded her.

“Aren't I, though?” She shrugged her shoulders in defeat.

Michael had to give her that. They had never defined what they were. Hell, he wasn't even sure if they had even admitted to the other but the love was there, “You love him,” he said it as fact.

“And you,” she said.

“You see why that's a problem,” he closed his menu, his eyes boring into her soul.

She nodded, dropping her gaze when she couldn't stand him looking anymore, “He's fragile to a certain degree. He's home with your parents and I don't want to make anything harder for him,”

“Do you take care of him because you want to or because you think you have to?” Michael asked, taking her hand and stroking his thumb over her knuckles.

“Because I want to. Because I love him,” she stated confidently and plainly. Michael was satisfied.

“But you love me too” Michael thought about the words over and over in silence, “Don't tell him that,”

“I'm not stupid,” she retorted, “I just had to say it to someone,”

“A bit selfish if you ask me,” Michael scoffed.

She took her hand back from his, “Maybe...Yeah. Yeah, it was. I'm sorry,”

As he opened his mouth to speak, their waiter came back to take their order. The rest of the dinner passed and it took a minute for the awkward air to lift. They talked about Jim’s pickup time and taking him to the beach. Y/N couldn't get off work so she was going to meet them there afterwards.

The car ride back to his hotel was fairly silent too, aside from the soft music coming from the radio. Michael looked over to Y/N who looked straight ahead at the road. He leaned over, taking her right hand in his and laying it in his lap. She looked at him briefly with a smile before turning back to the road. The silence remained as Michael played with her fingers, lacing them with his and running his fingers along the creases in her hand until she pulled in front of his hotel.

“I'll see you tomorrow,” she smiled warmly.

He nodded and got out of the car. He turned back, leaning his head half in the window, “I love you too, by the way.” He didn't stay to find out what she thought. He only heard her light gasp as he turned to walk inside. Her car didn't pull out right away but he didn't look back.

The next day dragged on and on. Y/N tried to will herself to stop watching the clock. A watched clock never ticks, or so the saying goes. It never felt more true. When she was finally off the clock, she changed in the work bathroom. She put on the white bikini she knew Jim liked. Whenever she wore it, she would catch him staring at her ass. The one time she called him on it he swore it was because she had something stuck to her. She threw a dress over and it sprinted to the car. She already had her board in the back. Y/N liked to consider herself a safe driver but she never drove faster or switched lanes so much in her life. She wanted to see him.

When she parked her car at the beach, she could just make out her two boys down by the water. For that singular moment she was going to allow herself to forget about the day before. She was going to try and push everything out of her mind but the well-being of Jim. He was alive, he was detoxed and he was back home.

She walked down with her surfboard under her arm, damning the thing for being so bulky. All she wanted to do was run to them. She saw Jim turn, his hair floppy and wet, smiling at her with a grin so wide it made her heart hurt.

“Y/N” He yelled, dropping his board. She did the same as she ran to him. He picked her up in his arms and she wrapped her legs around his waist. She did not expect the full on kiss he pressed to her lips, nor did she expect the light moan that escaped her lips when his slipped his tongue slightly passed her lips and they lightly grinded together as he lifted her up a bit to get a better grip on her thighs.

She pulled away quickly, aware that Michael was mere feet away, “Hi Jim,” she smiled, “Can you put me down?”

“Sure,” he laughed, setting her down on her feet but holding her against him, “I told you she’d come,” he turned back smugly to Michael.

“Of that I had no doubt,” he said, running his hand through his blonde hair and eyeing Y/N.

She pulled back from Jim, going back for her board, before explaining, “I know I was late. Work and all. Have you guys been here long?” She asked.

“Define ‘long’,” Michael asked as his eyes slowly took in the sight of her in so little clothing. Jim, so taken by her in front of him, did not notice his brother staring.

Jim laughed, “Michael was never a fan of the beach. Thank God for you,” he said as he threw his arm around her shoulder.

“Well are we gonna stand around or are we going to go in the water?” She asked.

“You two go,” Michael said, “I need a break,” he scanned her face once more before he retreated to the spot they had claimed earlier. Y/N didn't want to know what was going on inside his head. She should’ve been more careful with how she greeted Jim, she knew that now. She wasn’t used to having to do that. Her and Jim had always been playful and affectionate in their friendship but that was different. Jim had never kissed her like that before.

As they walked to the water, Jim turned to her, “You know, I’ve been thinking about a lot of things,” he stopped when the water was at their knees.

“Okay?” She chuckled nervously.

“I was thinking about me and you. Us together,” he said, rubbing his hand down his face, “What do you think about it?”

“I’m not sure what you mean Jimmy,” she looked out into the water. It was beginning to swell, “We should get out there,” He nodded and followed her. They were their normal free spirited selves out riding the waves. They teased each other if they wiped out. They splashed at each other while they waited for another swell to come in. When they had enough, they came back to shore, tired and sun-kissed.

“Have fun?” Michael asked as she laid on the blanket next to him. Her eyes were closed and her body was wet. He eyes roamed and he skimmed his knuckle down her side when Jim wasn't aware.

She squirmed when he did, not expecting his touch. She sat up, taking the sunglasses off his head and wearing them herself, “For now,” He smirked at her but turned his attention to the men coming down from the parking lot.

“Are those them?” Michael ask, squinting from the sun, looking up at the group who were rowdy and obnoxious.

Y/N nodded and turned to Jim, “Hey Jimmy, wanna go for a walk?”

He turned back from waxing his board to look at what had Michael’s attention, “No. I’m not scared of them,”

“It’s not about being scared. It’s about me wanting to go for a walk,” she hopped to her feet, “Please,” she put out her hand. The guys were closer and the one who had Jim do the dumbest shit, Chad, was already calling his name, “Jim,” she pulled on his hand.

“Fine, fine. Jesus,” he huffed and they left Michael, once again, alone on the blanket.

Jim laced his fingers through Y/N’s, rubbing his thumb along the back of her hand. When the water came close, she backed up. They had been out of the water long enough that it now seemed cold. He looked at her, a mischievous glint in his eyes.

“Jim, don't touch me” she nervously chuckled, pushing him away, “I’m so serious,”

He lifted her off her feet and spun her around, “What was that, Y/N? You want to go in the water?”

“James, do not!” She laughed and held onto the arms that held her, digging her nails into his skin. Their laughing stopped and he set her down when they heard yelling. They turned back to the source of the noise. Michael and Chad were coming to blows. Michael had yelled something about Chad being a piece of shit and that’s all Chad needed to start throwing fists.

Jim left Y/N to run to his brother’s side. He pushed through the circle that surrounded them, pushing Chad back, “What the fuck? That’s my brother” he shouted.

“Listen, you know the rules around here. Best teach them to your brother” Chad shouted back. Michael only took that as an invitation to continue to hit him. They fell to the sand, punching wherever they could get in a hit. When Jim finally pulled Michael back, Chad’s face was bloodied and bruised and he decided he had had enough. He went off to lick his wounds with his crew somewhere else.

Y/N had watched it all in horror, taking some ice out of their cooler and wrapping it in a towel, “Michael, you’re so stupid,” she said, her voice laced in panic. Her heart was racing a mile a minute.

“That’s my fucking brother, Y/N. He did this to him,” he yelled at her.

Jim nudged Michael’s leg with his foot, “ Don’t yell at her. She’s just worried for you,”

“Worried for you. Worried for me. That seems to be her job these days,”

Y/N wiped the blood off his face delicately before holding the ice to the swollen skin under his eye, “Don’t be an asshole, Michael” she said low. His face softened and his eyes fell, “Are you okay? Nothing broken right?” She gingerly lifted his hands, checking his reddened knuckles.

“Nothing broken.” He confirmed.

Jim began to pack everything up, “It’s time to go. I’ll bring all this shit to the car,” he said as he picked up the cooler and his surfboard. He turned back to Michael before he went, “Thank you,”

Y/N waited until Jim was out of earshot before she spoke, “I’m sorry about before,”

“Nothing to be sorry about. We don’t belong to each other,” he spoke harshly. Y/N held the ice with more pressure against his face, only stopping when he pulled away.

“Don’t be an asshole,” she repeated, “This isn’t easy for me either. It’s not like this is how I like to spend my days,”

“Sorry,” he mumbled, “He just...he loves you. You can see it in everything he does. Every move he makes,”

Y/N looked up the beach where Jim was just an outline struggling to fit everything in Michael’s car and sighed, “Let’s go,” she stood, holding out her hand and helping him up the best she could.

When they got to his car, she handed him the ice, reminding him to hold it to his face, “Jim maybe you should drive,” She looked at Michael’s face one more time, “and maybe you shouldn’t go home. Go to your hotel, Michael. Don’t let Sandy see you like that or she’ll shit a brick,” The two brothers looked at each other and nodded in silent agreement. Jim left to pack Y/N’s board into her car.

Y/N came to the passenger side bending over to talk, “Are your sure you’re okay?” She asked as she gently ran her thumb over his bottom lip.

“As good as I can be,” he said as he put his hand over hers. She dropped her hand when she saw Jim come back, yelling about having packed her surfboard in her car. She gave Michael a quick kiss on the head, afraid to touch him anywhere else and left him to tend to himself.

Jim left his brother in the car to walk Y/N to hers a few spots down. He followed closely behind, leaving little room for her between his chest and the car door, “There’s still a few things we should talk about,”

“Jimmy, maybe we should focus on you first. On getting you on the right track,”

Jim looked down, hands on either side of her, leaning on the door of her Jeep, “Is this you letting me down easy and me not taking a hint?”

She shook her head, grasping his face in her hands to look at her, “I love you, Jim. You know that,”

Jim smiled that boyish grin that always made her stomach flutter, “Love you too, angel.” She hugged him tight and felt him brush his lips against her jaw as she pulled away.

“Behave,” she teased, “Go take care of Michael. He did good today,” she reminded him.

He nodded, “Yes, ma’am. See you tomorrow?”

“See you tomorrow” She smiled before climbing into her Jeep and headed home as confused as ever.

@duncans-donuts @langdonfern @langdonsdemon @duncvn @goshdarnitthatsalongname @silkyhoneybaby @samanthasmileys @justareader @toohalseymuch @sloppy-wrist @xscarlett-rosex @lukeyasheycalymikey @14-bees @meggleangelo @kylolangdon @ofbadchoices @y0utoo @javeneov03 @our-mrlangdon @gallxntdean @drowning-ophelia-writes @bitchchatter @howaboutanap @tigers-pat @boofy1998 @hxdesworld @langdon-michael @ourownhorrorstory @daadddysprincesss @mystic-reader @01-800-mary @dunc-donut @abbys-horror-story @alexa-is-on-fire

[oddpairofeyes]

trii was tagged by sweethearts @080525 and @replaymp4 , hehe thank you so much!! 💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖

rules: answer these 85 statements about Urself, then tag 20 people

LAST

drink - water ; staying hydrated for shinee💦💦 

phone call - this stalker who harrasses us for two years now lol :////

text message - sent sara aka @01sag a post abt iced coffee ;_;

song you listened to - judge me but cheetah girls - step up

time you cried - yesterday e yedgug?? nvm edit : it was 10min ago

EVER

dated someone twice - i never even dated once ;( 

kissed someone and regretted it - hhhhhhhhhhhhh yee 

been cheated on - no and hamdoulillah 

lost someone special - yes 

been depressed - the grind never stopped since 6th grade !!!!!

gotten drunk and thrown up - yes 

FAV COLORS

#0f0096

#5fe8be 

black

all shades of blue tbh

#44080e

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE U…

made new friends - a very few but yes 

fallen out of love - noo

laughed until you cried - a friend stuck bread on a tree branch at school and i LOST it 

found out someone was talking about you - they aint about that .....

met someone who changed you - no 

found out who your friends are - hm i have no clue i dont really care lol :(

kissed someone on your facebook friends list - astaghfirullah no thank Allah😞

GENERAL

how many of your facebook friends do you know irl - all? i think

do you have any pets - not right now 

do you want to change your name - yes! i dont like my name that much :( 

what did you do for your last birthday - studied for an exam , cried , ate pizza and cake and watched a shinee concert if i remember well !

what time did you wake up today - 9am ish 

what were you doing at midnight last night - watching 2000s hit songs compilations ugfeguergdzi

what is something you can’t wait for - getting the fuck out of high school like please where’s my bac already 

what are you listening to right now - said the people - dinosaur jr !

have you ever talked to a person named tom - nope 

something that gets on your nerves - when someone has bad attitude or is tensed up for nothing , God 

most visited website - youtube , pnterest and tumblr i guess .. and one i cant say lol

hair color - B&B : Brown & Boring :D

long or short hair - reaaaaally short lmoa 

do you have a crush on someone - no

what do you like about yourself - that i’m ambitious and can talk my way out of almost anything ! 

want any piercings - a helix hehe

blood type - A+ 

nicknames - hib , gigi bc of my last name .. hiba inu , hibz , my brother calls me cheeky fool :( my parents call me pipish or bibita which is incredibly embarrassing to say right here right now 

relationship status - do i look like anyone could ever want to date me     ever

zodiac - libra ♎

pronouns - she/her ! 

fave tv shows - oooooooo crap i’d say sherlock bbc lol and peaky blinders 

tattoos - i want some stick and poke ones 

right or left handed - right 

ever had surgery - noooo 

piercings -i have two on each ear and planning on adding more !

sport - i    do not comprehend this qquestion

vacation - i’m still on vacation actually, the longest ones ive had, since the start of june so i’m currenty Dying tbh

trainers - ???

MORE GENERAL

eating - rn ...air ; we eat at very late hours in morocco especially my house 

drinking - water 

Im about to watch - a documentary 

waiting for - my teeny weeny afro to grow =( 

want - to have confidence in myself 

get married - i’m sorry but we do not believe in that in this household 

career - one i want is anything scientific ! one im forced to do is business stuff haha 

WHICH IS BETTER

hugs or kisses - hugsssss

lips or eyes - eyes 

shorter or taller - hmmm tough bc i like to hug people but also love to snuzzle my head in someones chest so i really dont know :/

older or younger - same age ? and older 

nice arms or stomach - neither i dont care egyegfegfe

hookup or relationship - well 

troublemaker or hesitant - as a libra thats just obvious but im a bit of a troublemaker too

HAVE U EVER

kissed a stranger - noo ): 

drank hard liquor - yeeeeees (:

lost glasses - oh GOD it was so bad i walked into a glass door while looking for them and started nosebleeding

turned someone down - yes :$

sex on first date - lmoa

broken someone’s heart - i hope not but some have told me that i did :( 

had your heart broken - meh 

been arrested - nooo but i got stopped by security guards a few times 😶

cried when someone died - this is just hilarious isnt it :P XD 

fallen for a friend - yes 

DO U BELIEVE IN

yourself - we’re working on it 😔😔

miracles - yes sometimes 

love at first sight - no honestly , i agree with nemeth 💞on the lust at first sight option 

santa claus - look i may have the mental age of a 5 year old but come on-

kiss on a first date - it seems to always happen so yes? even if i cant speak out of experience you know 

angels - YES 💞💞💞💞

OTHER

best friend’s name - i dont really have BEST friends but my really close ones are named sara , marwan and selma 

eye color - again ; B&B : Brown & Boring -_-

fave movie - the rocky horror picture show 

fave actor - none really

i’m tagging @01sag @taemsbaby @virgostellium @infpline @stylishmp3 @cupidjohnny @gothmonster @iloveminho @moon9oddess @viewgf @jaeminbf @diorclit @diorwlw @159rm @mlnho @tophyuna @nctanti @tittiesloveblog @6apricorn @chaoticsoftie and anyone who wants to do it, really ! also sorry for my dumbass answers 😤 i hope it was at least a tiiny bit entertaining to fucking read . 🤔👏💞

[paradisobound]

Piecing Together My Mind

Written for the Reverse Big Bang 2017!

Summary: When Dan is the victim of a terrible car accident, he suffers unbelievable trauma to his brain. As a result, only a few doctors in the world can perform the operation that is needed for him to recover: one the doctors being Phil Lester from America. Through the surgery and his recovery, Phil is there for him every step of the way, leading them into a spiral of love no one can predict, which eventually gains attention and popularity through a book written by Dan. 

Artist: @audaw

Beta: @carditawrites

Rating: Mature (for the themes involved)

Warnings: hospital settings, car accident, surgery

Word Count: 10,763

Authors Note: When I first began to write this fic, it came really easily and I was so happy with it. The car accident depicted was actually based upon my own car accident, just more dramatically, because I felt like I needed to vent it out and this fic was perfect for it. Through the process of writing, I went from nearly finishing it in one sitting to not touching it for months, and then finishing it all in one sitting. And it’s been a ride lol. But I seriously wouldn’t be able to do it without the help of my awesome beta @carditawrites because she literally helped give me so much inspiration for this! I really hope you all enjoy it as well! Happy reading! :) 

  In hindsight, Dan should have stayed home. He shouldn’t have attempted to get into his car and drive off in the severe downpour that was washing away the streets. He should have just waited until it stopped. But at the time, he thought the rain was going to stop and he would be able to make it to his parent’s house.

His mind was already clouded with dark afterthoughts and his eyes were blurry with unshed tears as the thought of the break up plagued his head. Maybe if Damien had just waited a few more hours, he wouldn’t have felt so inclined to travel back to his parents’ home in a complete downpour.

Dan could barely see the road in front of him, his headlights not making much of a leeway in this darkness. The glare from the lines on the road weren’t helping his already blurred eyes. Maybe he should have just pulled off and wait until the rain lets up. There wasn’t even a way that he could continue to drive in this.

But his mind told him that he was going to fine and the weather was going to change. The rain was going to stop soon and he would run out of it. So he powered on, his fists gripping the steering wheel tightly to the point where his knuckles were white; his foot moving over the gas pedal and then to the break when he needed to slow down.

He didn’t even know how long he had been driving now. It had been at least an hour. Maybe he wasn’t even going in the right direction. To be fair, he couldn’t tell. His windshield wipers were going as fast as they could and they still weren’t fast enough. They were beating away the rain that Dan just willed to stop so he could get to the safe haven of his parents. He craved their attention in ways that he couldn’t nearly describe. All he wanted to do was cry to them about how much he loved Damien and how heart broken he was.

The slip… he felt it within the first couple seconds. The tires on the car were fighting to pass through the water that was on the road. Dan’s foot found the break and he pressed it, willing his car to slow down but it wasn’t working. The back of his car had a mind of it’s own, swinging out right and he heard the noise. Metal on metal in a collision that will forever haunt Dan’s mind.

He didn’t remember what happened after that. Maybe a couple of turns and possibly some more colliding. All he knew was that the airbags deployed, leaving his flesh with black and blue marks that would later sting when he took a breath.

For the first few moments after the accident, Dan was conscious enough to realize the severity of it all. His car was upside down somewhere and his head burned with pain. His limbs felt tired and exhausted and he knew he needed to get out, call for help and pray that someone would come by and see him.

He went to move when his arm felt like it was grinding against shard glass. He cried out, trying his best to just escape but he knew he wasn’t going to do this by himself. He needed to get help.

His arm was moving to the passenger seat for his phone when he heard the first siren come. It was far enough away where the sound didn’t hurt his ears but close enough that he knew he was going to get help.

But he didn’t get to see the police officers and ambulance arrive, because his sight went black just moments before and his body fell limp.

The distant beeping was what pulled him from the void that clouded his mind. He opened his eyes and then immediately closed them when white fluorescent lights filled his vision. It was too bright in there: he needed it to be darker.

His body had other plans though, and his eyes reopened. It took a moment to adjust before he processed where he even was. Was he dead? Was this heaven? Was that why he was suddenly being blinded by the light? He was no believer in God but maybe after this, he would be.

After a moment of adjustment, he was able to come to his senses and realize that he was in an all white room. Cords littered the floors as they led out of his body in various places. The distant beeping wasn’t a weird noise that he was just hearing; it was his heart monitor.

His eyes hurt to adjust but quickly a pair of blue scrubs came into view and he opened them wider to see who was in front of him. A perky blonde in all blue scrubs was stood at his bedside, a clipboard in hand and stethoscope around her neck. “Good morning, Mr. Howell. We’re extremely happy to see you’re awake!”

Dan turned his head and whimpered at the ache of pain in his neck. His muscles felt stiff and unmoved, his mouth felt like cotton and as he opened it to ask for pain meds, he realized he wanted water a lot more. “Wa—wat—water,” he croaked out.

The nurse quickly moved around the bed and came back with a clear cup filled with the cool liquid. She handed it to Dan, who reached up to grab it when he realized he couldn’t move his arm very fell. Maybe it was the stiff muscles, but it took some shaky movements to get to the cup where the nurse helped him ingest the refreshing liquid.

When the cup was empty, the nurse moved it back to the side before looking him over. “How is your pain, Mr. Howell?”

“H-hurts,” he croaked out, his head now pounding and his lower body radiating pain. He didn’t know if it was from the movements he was doing now after being dormant for so long or from the accident…

The accident. The memory suddenly flooded his head. He had gotten into a car accident: he knew that much, but he couldn’t remember what happened or what had caused it.

“Well, we can't have you be in pain, can we?” the blonde stated as she picked up a syringe and injected the liquid medication into his IV. The long tube was connected to an area in his arm, scaring him slightly, but he looked like a machine being fed by wires.

Nearly instantly, his pain began to lesson and he relaxed into the bed, noting the terrible quality of the mattress he was lying on. “Do you know what happened, Dan?”

The sudden use of his first name made him turn his head a lot quicker than he should have. He groaned inwardly to himself at the movement and willed his muscles to relax to ease the pain. “No,” he finally said softly, his voice hoarse and raspy.

“Well, I’ll wait for the doctor to tell you then,” she said sympathetically. “You were conscious for the first few minutes in the hospital and I didn’t know if you were aware then?”

Dan shook his head softly, leaning back into the bed and shutting his eyes. Just this simple conversation was using all of his energy. He felt drained and ready to sleep all over again. He just wanted to relax further.

“You’re welcome to relax, Dan,” she said gently. “The doctor is now aware that you are awake and he’ll be wanting to speak with you soon, okay?”

Dan wanted to nod, but instead he let go of a shallow breath and shut his eyes. He let the nurse continue her routine vital checks as he felt poked and prodded all over again. She checked his breathing, his blood pressure, his IV drip, and a bit more that Dan couldn’t tell.

It wasn’t long after she was finished that he heard a soft knock against the door and the creak of it opening. He opened his eyes long enough to notice a tall middle aged man with a white coat enter his room. This had to be the doctor. His grey hair and glasses gave way that he was an experienced man and Dan didn’t know if that made him feel better or not.

“Are you finished, Louise?” the male boomed out in a deep voice.

The nurse, called Louise, nodded her head before exiting the room and taking the cart of equipment with her in the process. Meanwhile, the doctor was now pulling up a seat next to Dan’s bed, which scared Dan because this had to be obviously serious. There would be no other reason for the doctor to be sitting, other than telling him bad news. Maybe he was going to die after all.

The thought scared him more than the idea of being hurt.

“How are you feeling, Dan?”

Dan felt the urge to shrug his shoulders, but he didn’t know if he was able to do that action so he just replied, “Okay,” instead.

“Well, that’s good,” The doctor noted. “My name is Dr. Meny and I was your surgeon last night.”

Surgeon. Dan knew that wasn’t good. He had gone through surgery and never even known it.

“You see,” Dr. Meny continued. “If you cannot remember, you were the victim of a very serious car crash. You were brought to me at the emergency room last night, and had appeared fine. However, after just a few minutes within the ER, you began to fall into a seizure. Unknowing what could have caused this, we notified your next of kin - your parents - and they told us you had no history of seizures. Confused, we performed a CT Scan of the brain and noticed that you have swelling, which is what we call cerebral edema, or excess fluid within the walls of the brain cells. Now, noting this, our next priority was decreasing the pressure as much as possible because if there is a lot of pressure inside the skull, blood will not flow to that section of the brain and therefore, it can lead to very serious health conditions. This includes seizures, strokes, and even death.” He paused for a moment.

Dan took the time to process what he was hearing and a single tear escaped down his cheek as he thought the worst. He was going to die and this was the doctor telling him that he only had a short time to live. He knew it. Reaching a hand up, he felt the bandage around his head that he had never felt before. He moved his hand back down and allowed for the doctor to speak to him more.

“Now, do not think that this isn’t treatable,” Dr. Meny said reassuringly. “This can be treatable and that is why we operated last night in an emergency surgery. We went in and tried to relieve the pressure by removing some of the extra fluid because, you see, when the accident occurred, you did damage to your head. And I'm sure you probably are feeling the symptoms of it, like memory loss.” Dan nodded slowly, because he was experiencing that.“But the surgery was unsuccessful. We were not able to remove that fluid.”

“So what does that mean?” Dan asked just as soon as the doctor's words were finished. “Why wasn’t it able to fixed if it’s treatable?”

“Well, here is the thing,” The doctor began, “We think that there is something further inside of the brain that isn’t allowing for the swelling to go down. We think there is some trauma further down that we are not seeing. Since we are not specialists on the brain, we can only do so much.”

“But what can I do?” Dan pleaded. “What options are there for me?”

The doctor pulled out a notebook from his jacket pocket and flipped open the cover, “In the time that you have been recovering, we have found three surgeons in the world that are able to work inside the brain in a precise way that will not damage the brain. We have contacted all of them and two have responded,” he pulled out a pen and wrote some things on his notepad. “However, until we can find out which one will be willing to take on your case, we are obligated not to disclose their information.”

Dan seethed inside of his head. Why couldn’t he know who would be opening his head up and drilling into his brain? Wasn’t he important enough to find out?

“When will we find out?”

“Well,” Dr. Meny began. “We heard back from one of the two doctors, this one being from America, who is willing to fly out and consult you to do the surgery. However, we have not heard back from the other doctor—”

“I want the first one,” Dan spat out. “I want the one that is willing to fly from America to here to do my procedure.”

“Are you sure?” Dr. Meny asked, scribbling something else on his notepad.

“Yes,” Dan spoke out. “I want them to do the procedure because they’re clearly willing to fly over here to see me, so they deserve to operate on me.”

“But this needs careful—”

“Why?” Dan asked in a spiteful manner. “Why would I need to be careful about this? My brain is swelled. Remember, you told me so. This could mean so much and…” Dan felt his voice get choked up. “I want to be able to have a doctor who wants to do the procedure for me instead of doing it for the money. That’s all.”

“Dan, I just want to reiterate that—”

“I know,” Dan interrupted, “I want that doctor.”

Dr. Meny sighed and wrote something more on his notepad before standing up from his sitting position, “I will have my secretary contact the doctor and we’ll go from there.”

“Am I able to know the doctors name now?” Dan asked, relaxing into the bed as a strong headache began to form in the back of his skull.

“His name is Dr. Philip Lester and he’s a prized Neurosurgeon from Los Angeles.”

Dan nodded, half listening to the words as the pain in his head began to radiate towards his eyes and his vision clouded. Groaning in discomfort, he squeezed his eyes shut and gripped onto the blankets of his hospital bed with white knuckles as he willed for the pain meds to take over and take away this God-awful pain.

His wish was soon granted as he slipped into a black void as his body refused to fight the pain.

They had him Skype with Dr. Lester that afternoon, following the arrival of Dan’s parents who were worried sick over their son. Dr. Meny had reassured Dan multiple times that he was going to be okay and that he could do all normal, everyday things but he just had to be wary of his head and hitting it on surfaces too hard. For instance, like Dr. Lester later explained, lying down in bed or on a couch too fast.

But that still didn’t help his worry.

With his laptop sat on the conveniently placed table, he Skyped with this Philip Lester and felt his worries simultaneously diminish and also increase. On the screen, Dr. Lester appeared to be extremely professional as he spoke to Dan in the comfort of his office. The time difference was very clear but that didn’t seem to affect Dr. Lester at all.

Dr. Lester explained to Dan that his life was not going to be affected at all if he can help it. In fact, he had already booked a flight straight to the UK to see Dan the following day which Dan thought was extremely generous. He’d never heard of a doctor doing this before but in all honesty, he liked that.

The Skype call didn’t last long, because Dr. Lester told him that he was going to consult with him tomorrow more about what he can do to help Dan out. In the meantime, Dan was just worried about something else happening to alter his already swelled mind.

This worry was aggravated since earlier in the day, just as Dr. Meny was about to leave, Dan fell into another seizure that he had to be brought out of. He came out exhausted and ready to collapse. He couldn’t remember that it happened, but he had a sinking feeling that it had occurred.

Once Dan was alone with his parents again, they questioned him about Damien. But Dan didn’t even know who Damien was. Apparently, Damien was Dan’s boyfriend., but Dan couldn’t remember him. He didn’t even know of anyone named Damien.

A picture was showed to him from his nearly destroyed mobile phone which confirmed to him that he, in fact, did know a Damien and he was somehow involved with Dan. Another quick look at his text messages proved that whatever he had with Damien had fizzled out because of another person named “Becky”.

“Are you sure that you don’t remember him, Dan?” Dan’s father stated in a helpful manner as he sat at Dan’s bedside.

Dan shook his head as slowly and carefully as possible because no, he did not remember him. Frankly, he wasn’t sure if he wanted to. It had to be a blessing that his short term memory was altered so he couldn’t remember Damien and anything he did.

“Well, I guess that’s okay,” Dan’s mother piped in, “Right, John?”

Dan’s father nodded before reaching out and taking Dan’s hand in his own, squeezing his palm gently. Dan looked down at their clasped hands and smiled. He will be forever grateful for the love and support he received from his parents all this time.

“So the doctor comes in tomorrow, yeah?”

“Yes, he should be here in the morning.”

“But when will the surgery be?”

Dan shrugged his shoulders carefully. “Hopefully soon,” he said. “I don’t want any more damage to be done and I want whatever damage I do have to be fixed.”

“We know, Daniel,” his mother added. “But we’re very scared right now.” Tears glistened in her eyes.

Dan tried to fake a smile to tell her that he was okay but it faltered and tears cascaded down his cheeks like a stream. He wasn’t sure if he was ever going to be okay. He always joked about death but now that he was on the verge of death, it was terrifying him. He never got to fulfill his life. He hadn’t done what he was set out to do. If he was to die now, he wouldn’t have a lasting impression on anyone.

He needed to be remembered by something. If he didn’t make a lasting impression, then what did he ever do with his life besides waste it away?

A book.

Dan was going to write a book. But a book on what? He was fighting within himself mentally to the point where he was giving himself another headache. What would he write a book about?

Then the idea hit him.

He would write a book about this. About the car accident and what he remembered; about his fight for life as his brain swelled; about the doctor who was gonna save his life. He was gonna write a memoir. He was already thinking of the ideas for it in his head.

He was going to make a difference. If he survived this battle, he was going to show everyone what he went through: the seizures that he never used to have; the memory loss; everything.

“What are your thoughts right now, Daniel?” His mother asked, placing a hand over his fathers that was still clasped in Dan’s own hand.

“I want to survive this,” Dan stated, with a newfound courage in his voice. “I will survive this. Dr. Lester will help me. He’ll heal me and find the damage that is causing my seizures and pain.”

“Yes, Daniel,” she added. “God is looking over you in ways that we cannot believe.”

Dan had to agree with her words. He was a self-proclaimed Atheist but even he had to admit that this was somewhat of a miracle.

“Why don’t you get some rest, Daniel?” His father said suddenly, reaching behind him and undoing their hands so he could fluff Dan’s pillows, “I think you deserve to sleep for a little bit and rest your eyes.”

Dan had to agree with that as well. He was exhausted in ways that he simply couldn’t describe. His eyelids weighed heavily on his lashes and his mouth fought back a yawn. Shutting his eyes, this time with his own control, he relaxed into the bed and succumbed to the brink of sleep that was overtaking him.

“Dan.” Louise, his nurse, spoke as he carefully chewed away at a piece of toast. “Dr. Lester has just arrived to the hospital and is requesting to see you immediately. Is it okay for him to come in?”

Dan nodded, finishing up his bite of food before brushing the crumbs off from his hands onto the bedding that was surrounding his tired and bruised legs. He saw his body for the first time last night when he used the bathroom. The mirror didn’t lie when it showed him a discolored face with a bruised left side; cuts and scratches that littered his stomach and bruises that littered his chest, and the dark marks that stung on his thighs when he walked. He nearly cried because for the first time in his life, Dan didn’t recognize the man staring back at him in the mirror.

He had one more seizure that night. He woke up briefly before he fell into it, the machines going crazy as this one became the strongest and worst one yet that Dan has experienced. The nurses murmured about him. He heard their talk as they all discussed how Dan needs to be seen. The more seizures he has, the worse his brain would be and the more damage he would have: permanent damage that would change his life forever.

Dan’s parents were waiting in agony to hear about what Dr. Lester has to say. They wanted to stay by Dan’s side but Dan didn’t want them to worry so he sent them to a hotel for the night instead. He was sure that they were probably at the hospital, sitting in the waiting room while they thought Dan was still asleep. And hell, Dan still would be, considering the time was six in the morning but he had to be woken up for vital checks every few hours and they got the best of him last night.

“Yes,” Dan said to Louise, “I’m really eager to see him.”

Nearly a minute later, a soft knock echoed into his room and Dan watched as the door slowly opened. A raven haired man walked through the door with glasses that bridged the top of his nose. When he turned to Dan’s direction, Dan felt all breath leave his body as he stared into his deep blue eyes.

This had to be Dr. Lester.

“Pleasure to finally see you, Dan.,” He spoke with soft, careful words. “I’m sure you already know but incase you don’t, I’m Dr. Lester. It’s great to meet you in person and not over a webcam.”

Dan smiled at him. Not just a small friendly smile but a full big smile because he already felt better with him here. Dr. Lester gave off this presence that significantly made Dan feel better.

Dr. Lester’s hand stretched out to Dan’s and Dan took it in a warm handshake.“Nice to meet you too, Dr. Lester.”

“Oh please!” he said pulling up a seat next to Dan and taking out a medical chart. “You can call me Phil since I’m going to be seeing more of you than you probably want.”

Dan could have choked. Seriously, if he had been eating, he would have because that crude humor was exactly what Dan liked. He knew instantly he was going to like this guy.

“That came out really wrong,” Phil chuckled like a high schooler. “Oh, what a great first impression I have made. My excuse is that jet lag has gotten the better of me this morning.”

Before Dan could get any words in, Phil interjected again with the medical talk nearly immediately, “I have reviewed your CT scans and can tell already that the doctors here have missed a vital part of what is causing the swelling. From what I have seen, I can tell you are bleeding inside of your brain. The damage suffered is quite extensive and is quite definitely what is causing the seizures. Now, here is the problem: I will need to go into your brain within the next 24 hours because if any more bleeding occurs, life threatening instances will occur, and I don’t want that happening okay?”

Dan nodded slowly, having trouble keeping down his breakfast after hearing Phil’s words. Goosebumps crawled up his skin and prickled at his nerves. His stomach twisted into knots and squeezed as he processed the words that were just spoken to him. The more he thought about the phrase “life threatening instances will occur”, the worse his stomach felt and he temporarily looked around just in case he needed to expel his breakfast somewhere.  

“So what we are going to do, is that I’m going to do a final CT scan on you. What that scan is going to show is what I will be working with here. If your brain is swelled further, it’s going to make my job much more difficult. But do not worry! I will fix the problem,” Phil then leans over the bed, causing Dan to wonder what he’s doing until Phil shows him a graphic template of a brain on an iPad that shows exactly what Phil is going to do. “So here is the plan: you are going to be awake for the entire thing, just sedated. I am going to open up the cranial flap large enough to open the skull and reveal the brain. Once inside, I’m going to carefully relieve the fluid in a determined way so that all the swelling will decrease. Once the swelling goes down, I will go further into the brain and use a clamp to cut off the blood flow wherever you are bleeding. Once the bleeding is done, I’ll cauterize the artery. By the looks of it, the bleeding is coming from just above the cerebral cortex, which is a big deal because if the bleeding doesn't stop, you can go into shock. This can cause anything from paralysis to stroke, to an aneurism to death.” Dan nodded slowly to Phil’s words. “During the procedure, you’re going to be speaking with me. This is how I will know that I haven’t hit anything in the brain that can be life threatening. Do not be afraid, okay, Dan? Everything is going to be fine.”

“I’m really scared,” were the only words that came out of Dan’s mouth.

Phil nodded, pulling the iPad away and setting his belongings on the end of Dan’s bed. He reached out and grabbed Dan’s hand, noting the loss of color within Dan’s skin, and squeezed softly. Dan was shaking slightly, his body feeling fear from the impending operation. What Dan didn’t know was that Phil was nervous too but Phil couldn’t begin to even imagine the fear that must be setting inside of Dan as he spoke. “I know, Dan,” he said sympathetically  but at the same time he knew his words would be helpless. “I’m nervous too because this is the hardest procedure I’ve ever done, but I have full confidence that I’m going to get it. I’m going to heal you.”

Dan took a deep, shuddering breath before nodding and smiling softly at Phil. “I trust you.”

“I know,” Phil reiterated. “Now, I have to go over the risks. Anything done to the brain is a risk in itself. Although it’s never happened to me, one slip could be fatal. Any little slip from me and my scalpel can cause paralysis or death, but that’s not gonna happen.”

Dan nodded and took another deep breath, “So when does this happen?”

“If we can get your CT scan done this morning, I can do the surgery this afternoon.”

“That soon?”

Phil nodded. “The sooner the better.”

Phil’s hand released from Dan’s long enough for a new nurse to come in and begin prepping Dan’s for his CT Scan. Dan was amazed at the quick work of the doctors and nurses at this hospital, but Phil quickly mentioned that he put the order in as soon as he arrived this morning. Phil was just as shocked about the quick work.

Dan was wheeled to the nuclear imaging center of the hospital where he was shifted from his bed to another much less padded and much colder gurney. He was instructed to lay flat as they adjusted the lead protective shields around him. He’d groan and whimper if a nurse was too rough with him. Moments later, a loud voice boomed through the speaker next to him that caused him to relax: it was Phil.

“We’re about to start the scan now,” Phil said. “We’re going to move you inside of the camera now where you will be scanned. The test should go by fast and I’ll be here to speak with you the entire time.”

The bed underneath him suddenly shifted and he looked to see that he was moving forward into this cylinder that reminded him of a coffin. He felt like everything was closing in on him and he gripped the sheets under him, claustrophobia setting in.

“Dan,” Phil’s voice spoke out to him. “Dan? Can you calm down for us? Your heart rate and brain activity have suddenly spiked.”

“I’m sorry,” Dan spoke out, mostly in a whisper.

“It’s okay, Dan,” Phil coaxed. “Everything is going to be okay. I know that it’s hard to believe right now but you’re going to be okay.”

Dan didn’t move but he felt like he needed to relieve the pressure and tension from his shoulder blades. A weight was now sat on them, making him feel even more weighed down than the lead blanket that had given him to protect from radiation.

“Okay, we’re about to start the scan so stay as still as possible, got it?”

Dan didn’t reply. Instead he felt the hair on his body prickle up from the radiation. It made a small shiver go through his spine at the thought of the scan he was going through pumping his body full of toxic chemicals. But to Dan, this definitely isn’t the worst thing to happen right now. The worst thing would be him falling into a seizure on this gurney.

Dan could still feel and hear the buzzing around himself as the scan continued. He didn’t hear anything from Phil over the speaker for a while, until Phil told him the scan was almost over. Just a few moments after that, Dan heard the buzzing stop and he was soon being retracted from the cold metal tube he was just inside.

As Dan was helped back onto the gurney, his head throbbed with pain and he felt the need to reach out and grab onto whatever he could hold. Within moments, his vision blacked and his worst fears came true as he fell into another seizure: right there in the room as Phil ran to his help.

This one was a lot harder to come out of. His body was just so tired of fighting it and he wanted them to just stop completely. When he opened his eyes slowly, Phil was staring at him with concern laced over his face. He reached out, pushing Dan’s fringe away from his eyes and tucked it gently behind his ear. Dan relaxed into the touch, his body still tense and rigid.

“You won’t have this hair for much longer,” Phil said with a gentle smile. “But to be fair, I think you’ll look fine bald.”

“Hmm,” Dan voiced. “I don’t know about that.”

Dan’s words were slurred and showed of exhaustion.

Phil smiled at him. “We’re going to do your surgery in a few hours, okay?” he stated. “But when you keep falling into seizures, it makes it hard for us because we need to ensure you’re not going to have one when you’re being operated on.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Hey,” Phil said, running his hands gently through Dan’s exposed hair. “I know they’re not your fault,” he said. “But do you know when you’re about to fall into one?”

Dan nodded softly. “I get a headache and then my vision blurs.”

“So you’ll be able to tell me if you start feeling one?”

“Yeah.”

“That’s all I need to know,” Phil stated to Dan as he retracted his hand from Dan’s hair. Dan visibly shook from the cold chill he got when the touch was left. He felt like a puppy who just wanted to be petted and have attention. “After your recovery, do you think you would care to join me for lunch?”

Dan opened his eyes a little bit more, even though they were still heavy with exhaustion. “Possibly,” he spoke. “As long as you can guarantee that I’ll still be alive.”

“Then it’s a date.”

Dan smiled to himself, finding himself blushing at the forwardness that Phil was showing to him. He felt good at the presence of Phil. He liked having Phil here: it made him feel safe and secure.

“I need to go and get prepared but I’ll see you in a few hours okay?”

Dan smiled at him. “Okay, Dr. Lester.”

Phil smiled back at him as he stood up from where he was sat and walked towards the door. He gave Dan one last look before exiting the room, leaving Dan shaking like a leaf as the nerves of the surgery kicked in.

The operating room was cold. Dan had asked for a blanket as he sat up on the operating table. A back support for him braced against his spine as he was told he’d be sitting for awhile. According to Phil, the surgery could take anywhere from 2 hours to 8 hours depending on what he found once inside his brain. But regardless of the time it would take, Phil was going to fix him.

He was slowly being sedated with a list of medication that Dan didn’t even know. He was still awake but he was numb everywhere and couldn’t even move his own arm. The idea of being in a temporary paralysis was quite terrifying but the thought of having his brain wide open for Phil was worse.

Per the request of his parent’s, they had the hospital pastor come into his room and say a prayer for him right before he was wheeled away for surgery. Dan had cried hysterically to his mother before he left, telling her he was scared of it. She tried her best to help him out of the fear but when she was fearful herself, it was hard. He had Phil’s reassurance and guidance to help him through this but he was still terrified out of his mind.

Right before Phil was set to enter the operating room, the anesthesiologist come in with a syringe and went to inject the liquid into Dan. “What is that?” he slurred.

“Dr. Lester has requested you be fully sedated for the procedure after all. He is saying that the risks are too high to leave you in a mild sedative.”

Dan felt himself start to panic. He had been told this entire time that Phil would talk with him through the procedure and now he was going to be knocked out. What about if he got knocked out and then never woke back up? He’d be put to sleep quite literally.

He was terrified now. His body shaking even though it was paralyzed and now he was on the verge of tears. “Take two deep breaths, Dan.”

Dan struggled to take in the one when he felt the world around him begin to spin. Just as his vision was blacking out, he watched Phil put his gloves on as he walked into the operating room.

One Week Later

“How are you feeling, Dan?”

Dan sat up straighter in his hospital bed, his head still slightly sore but his body feeling much more recuperate. He eyed Phil up and down as he stepped inside in his typical hospital attire.

“Really good!” Dan finally answered.

“That’s great!” Phil answered, moving forward and sitting down next to Dan at his bedside.

Dan’s surgery had taken nearly six hours. Phil worked until he found every last thing wrong and he fixed every single one. His surgery was a pure success and Phil had never been so proud of the fact that he completed such a dangerous surgery.

It was after the surgery that really showed Phil’s generosity to Dan. Phil was supposed to fly back a few days prior but had decided to stay until Dan was fully recovered. He predicted that within six weeks, Dan’s healing would be nearly complete but six months would be when he saw full change back into normality.

At one week later, Dan was beginning to see the signs that normality was on the horizon. Just one day after the surgery, the nurses had him up and walking around to make sure he hadn’t suffered any onset nerve damage. Phil didn’t think Dan would but he still watched from the sidelines as Dan walked slowly up and down the hallways.

By the second day, Dan was feeling really good. The nurses removed his bandages for the first time and he was able to see the intricate stitch work of Phil that went halfway around his head. He felt a little destress over seeing his hair being gone but Phil had reassured him that he looked fine without.

Phil was Dan’s biggest supporter at that point. Besides his parents, Phil was always there for each small milestone that Dan went through. Everything that Dan did, they did together. Even though Phil was Dan’s doctor, Dan felt like he had a friendship with Phil that was building quite fast.

It was the beginning of Dan’s recovery process. Phil wanted to start him fast so he would learn his skills and memory back fast. Phil talked about sending Dan to a specialist to help but Dan insisted that Phil was fine to help him. So Phil helped him slowly, but he was grateful for every little bit.

They began with basic information., like Dan’s family. So Phil asked Dan questions about his family, like what his mother's name was and his father’s name and if he had any brothers or sisters. The entire time, Dan felt humiliated, because he knew his family. He didn’t see how this was helping him if he already remembered all of this. Dan felt like laughing at Phil, because that for this was a joke for Phil to get his humor up. It turned out not be.

The second test Phil conducted involved an advised trip to the centre of London, where Dan was told to recite the directions to a store. Dan did so easily, even showing Phil little quirks on the streets to prove that he did remember. Pleasantly surprised, Phil decided to test three other locations, and Dan remembered these just as easy. Phil was rather proud. In fact, he was almost sure that they wouldn’t need any more tests. To be sure, he did another one just in case.

The third and final test came in the form of puzzles. Phil hid a single cheerio underneath a cup, and then told Dan to point out which cup the cheerio was under, and Dan failed every time. Phil was dumbfounded as to why Dan wasn’t getting this riddle. So he tried it again. This time, he made Dan follow his line of vision so he could see where the cheerio was going, and that helped Dan a lot. But that still didn’t make Phil happy with the results. He pushed Dan for the rest of the day, trying to get him to help and to learn.

That night, Dan felt something inside of his head. Something that signalled something was wrong. He was already stressed from not doing good on the test earlier that day, so maybe that had something to do with it? Phil was writing something else down in his notes, ready to leave when Dan stopped him. “Don’t leave!” Dan pleaded, “My head doesn’t feel good.”

“What’s going on?” Phil asked, extremely concerned.

“I...I feel like I could have another seizure and I’m scared.”

Phil stood up from where he was sat and walked over to Dan’s bed, sitting down next to him, “You need to relax for one.”

“I can’t,” Dan cried, “I’m stressed!”

“Can I?” Phil asked, and Dan was confused until Phil lifted the blankets off from Dan’s legs and slid underneath, getting close to him, “Scoot into me and just relax.”

Hesitant, but eager to stop the bad feeling, Dan did so. He moved closer and cuddled into him, letting Phil massage his back to soothe him. Soon, Dan had fallen asleep; the bad feeling gone.

In the morning, before Dan was awake, Phil checked him over, running a quick check up on his brain, noticing the activity was normal. He smiled in content, before leaving for his other plan for the morning. He went to the hospital store and picked up a box of chocolate and a bouquet of flowers. When he got back up to the room, Dan was just waking, and surprised to see Phil standing there with his gifts.

“Why did you get me these?” Dan asked.

“Because you had a rough night last night and I want you to feel better.”

And Dan knew in that moment that something new and exciting was brewing between him and Phil.

Dan was filled with nervous energy the day he was released from the hospital. His stitches were nearly healed and dissolved and his hair was growing back the way it should be. He still wore a cap over his head though to cover the lack of hair.

Phil had left with him. Dan was shocked at the fact Phil had cancelled his flight again to stay with Dan for a few more weeks. Dan was ever so grateful for the friendship that Phil has given him: all of the nights Phil had stayed in the hospital beside him, the days Phil had got him food because the hospital food was terrible, and the one special night where Dan felt like he was going into a seizure but Phil held him in his bed to calm him down. All of these led up to the present where Phil was now holding his hand as Dan shakily climbed out of the taxi at his apartment.

Dan couldn’t remember anything about his apartment. If he thought hard enough, which he tried not to do because he was scared of something happening, he could remember little details: like how his bed was against a white wall and how he had a white piano in the corner. All of that was merely just an image to Dan and he didn’t even know if it was something his brain was making up.

“You okay?” Phil asked in a soft voice as Dan stood on both feet, his knees shaking slightly.

“Just a little nervous is’all,” Dan replied making a few steps on the uneven pavement underneath.

The truth was that Dan wasn’t scared of walking or moving, he was just scared of falling. He was terrified of hitting his head on anything and even though Phil has sworn up and down that he’ll be okay, Dan was still nervous.

Phil took a hold of his hand and led him to the stairs of his apartment building. Dan slowly and carefully took the steps one step at a time as he held onto the railing with white knuckles. Looking up in front of him, Dan didn’t recognize the door, but yet he had this familiar feeling in the core of his stomach that told him this was his apartment.

Phil handed Dan the keys that Dan had given him, too scared that he would lose them if he held them himself. With shaking hands, he pressed the key into the doorknob, and twisted, allowing the door to spring open. Immediately, the scent of home flooded his sense and Dan smiled, feeling grateful to not smell disinfectant anymore. Walking through the doorway, the first thing he notices is that there is a TV on in the distance. The slightly static and grainy sound made its way to his ear.

He suddenly tenses.

Who was in his apartment?

He reached behind him and gripped Phil’s hand, walking slowly, “Someone's in here,” Dan mumbled.

Phil looked at him, “Are you sure?”

Dan nodded, “The TV is on. I can hear it.”

Phil took the lead, walking towards the now loud sound that was resonating through the tiny apartment. As they near closer, a pair of legs come into view and Dan’s heart kick starts. He leans closer to Phil, confused and upset about who could have broken into his apartment, especially when he’s been in the hospital?

“Who...who are you?” Dan asked, his voice shaky and unsure, lacking confidence.

The figure suddenly stood up and rushed over to him. Dan cowered, turning into Phil and hiding. The man was large, with broad shoulders and blonde hair. He scared Dan…Dan didn’t even know who he was or why he was here.

“Dan?” The voice boomed, deep and emotion filled, “Baby, is that really you?”

Dan turned his head, feeling his bandages catch a little on Phil’s shirt, but he ignored it and stared at the man, getting a good look at him, “Who are you and why are you calling me baby?”

The man’s eyes widened, a now deep brown that was sucking Dan in, “Dan? Do you not remember me?”

Dan was confused, horribly and terribly confused. He shook his head.

“Dan, I’m Damien...your boyfriend,” Dan felt his heart drop into his stomach, “We had a fight one night and...and you left and then I never heard anything from you. I...I called everyone and everywhere for you and no one knew! I was so scared, baby!”

Something about the man, Damien’s, words bit at Dan in an uncomfortable way. He didn’t like his tone, and he didn’t like what he was saying. Something was resonating deep inside of him, telling him something was terribly wrong.

“From what I know,” Phil suddenly chipped in, long forgotten in the reunion of Damien and Dan, “You broke up with Dan that night.”

That thought clicked in Dan’s head. That sounded about right.

“So why are you still in his apartment?” Phil asked, “And further, why didn’t you try harder to locate your so-called boyfriend as he was lying dying in the hospital?”

Dan swallowed hard, a sudden headache beginning in the back of his head near his neck. He said a silent ‘ow’ and moved his hand to touch the sore spot.

“Dan...come on now, you remember me?” Damien spewed out, “We loved each other. We...we had everything and we…”

“Damien,” Dan finally got out. “I don’t remember you,” he stressed, “And I don’t remember anything that you are saying. But the part that is striking inside of my head is that everything you are saying is a lie. I would really like you gone, now, okay?”

“You can’t kick me out of our apartment, Dan!” Damien cried, “I help pay for this!”

Dan shook his head, “You don’t anymore and I want you go. If you’re not gone, I’m going to call the police.”

Damien’s body tensed, and he backed up away from Dan was shaking and holding tightly onto Phil’s arm for leverage. He didn’t understand where the sudden confidence boost came from but he was glad it was there. He felt a sort of relief over the fact that he stood up to Damien. Maybe that’s what his old self wanted to do all along too.

Damien walked away, stomping over to the living room where he looked reluctant to do anything. But then he was gone, and the sound of various thrown items hitting the floor was heard throughout the apartment.

And Dan felt incredibly okay with this...it was exactly what he needed.

“You’ve had a rough day so what about watching a movie?”

Dan looked up from their dinner that Phil had ordered from a local restaurant just down the road. He was happy to eat something else besides mediocre hospital food. This Pad Thai was much more exciting to eat than grilled chicken that was way overcooked and hard.

“Yeah, that sounds okay with me,” Dan said with a smirk.

Phil was already done eating, and although Dan had a long ways to go, Phil stood up and headed into Dan’s living room and turned on the TV. Dan watched from the corner of his eye to see Phil open Netflix and surf through the movies until he finally found a new TV that Netflix just released, “I know you said that you wanted to watch a movie but what about this show? It’s called Stranger Things and it seems really interesting!”

Dan smiled wider, an unspoken agreement that he was okay to watch the show instead. He finished his food in slow bites before moving into the living room.

Sitting on the couch, there was evident space between him and Phil. He knew that he and Phil had gotten a lot closer than they intended to. For one, it wasn’t a normal occurrence for a doctor to go home with a patient. But Phil had insisted.

He suddenly felt brave. Moving closer to Phil, he scooted until their thighs touched and Dan leaned into him. He carefully rested his head on Phil’s chest, letting himself relax. It was such a small intimate gesture, but one that meant so much to them both at the same time.

They show became forgotten as Dan sat back up, staring Phil in the eyes before leaning in. He didn’t mean to, but he was. And now Phil was leaning in as well. And then their lips were touching, so soft and feather-like against each other.

And then it was all over. The kiss just remained that soft gentle kiss. And Dan smiled. He smiled brightly and Phil smiled back, reaching up and smoothing his thumb over Dan’s cheek, “Spend the night?” Dan asked.

“Okay.”

The day came way before either one wanted it to come. The day of Phil’s flight back to America where he would need to go back to work and see his patients that have been waiting for him for these long months.

But Dan didn’t want him to go. He never wanted him to leave.

They were stood in Dan’s door way, Phil’s hand intertwined in his as they faced each other, “Let’s go get coffee,” Phil said, “Spend one last good time together before I leave.”

The words were bitter and they hurt Dan as he listened. His bandages were gone and his incision on his head was just a scar now, his hair was growing around it and looking nice. But he was scared of never looking the same as he once was.

“I...don’t want you to leave.” Dan said, the words catching in his throat.

“I know,” Phil said sadly, “I don’t want to either. So that’s why we should make the most of our last day together.”

Dan joined him, and they headed to the coffee shop, both of them ignoring the somber feeling in the air around them.

Over the course of the past few weeks, they had developed something. Little kisses here and there and cuddling was in their everyday routine. Phil even stayed majority of his time with Dan in his apartment. But they never said to each other what they were. But it was evident both wanted more.

They sat in silence for a while at the coffee shop before Dan finally spoke, “At least this will give me an excuse to finally visit America.”

A sad look washed over Phil’s face, “Dan…”

“And you can show me around!” Dan spoke up, his voice wavering as he held back tears, “I’ve always wanted to see New York City and you can show me, right?”

Dan broke and began to cry, silent tears ran down his cheeks as he picked up a napkin and furiously wiped them away. Phil began to speak to him, but he didn’t listen as he looked around at the paintings on the walls. He focused on everything but Phil in front of him. He just wanted the memory of Phil and him being happy to replace the one of Phil leaving.

Phil reached across the table and took Dan’s hands in his, pulling him away from his face, the napkin falling on the table, “Dan, look at me.”

Dan refused to look so Phil repeated his words.

Then Dan finally looked.

“I know you’re having a tough time with this and I am too, but just know that everything is gonna be okay,” Phil said softly, “And you’re right, you can come and visit me and we can go visit all of these wonderful places.”

Dan nodded and smiled, tears still softly rolling down his skin, “If you promise?”

“If you don’t forget,” Phil said with a smile. Dan chuckled, they joked occasionally about Dan’s condition, but it was always in good taste and spirits.

The rest of the coffee date went by faster than they would have liked. But it soon came time for Phil to get his things from his hotel room and make sure he had everything packed. Dan offered to come with him but Phil told him to rest.

So Dan reluctantly went back to his apartment, but not without kissing Phil one last time before departing.

Dan was still laying on his bed when his phone chimed. Picking up, he noticed he had a text message from Phil, letting him know he made it to the airport okay. Dan let a few tears fall down his cheeks because deep in his heart, he hoped Phil would knock on his apartment door and tell him he changed his mind, and that he was going to stay with him.

But that knock never came.

He remained in his bed, depression setting in because he wanted so dearly to be with Phil in his apartment. He was nearly ready to fall asleep when a thought rang in his head…he could get to the airport and see Phil one more time before he left!

Jumping up, but not too quickly, he rushed around his room and gathered his belongings, picking his phone back up, he scrolled through his numbers, hoping his old self had a Taxi company in his contacts. He found the contact and called them, telling them he needed an urgent Taxi to the airport. The company told him all the Taxi’s were out already on calls.

Defeated, his next resort was checking out the hours of the tube station nearest to him and what trains were still running to the airport. But he was unpleasantly surprised to see none of them were running right now. He didn’t know what to do. There was nothing he could do. His options were pretty limited here.

He Googled taxi places around him to try and call but nothing came up besides a rental car company down the street. But he wasn’t going to rent a car. He didn’t want to ever drive again! Maybe he wouldn’t have a choice. Driving the car would be his only option.

Closing his eyes, he hit the number on the screen and let it ring. Quickly, someone answered and he told them his situation. They gave him the location of their office and told him they would let him rent a car for 35 pounds for the night. So he left his apartment shaking on wobbly legs as he walked down the street, and took a right, seeing the place just down from him.

He was given a small four-door car to drive, the keys in his hand. He was scared beyond belief but he needed to get to the airport. As it stood right now, he probably wouldn’t even make it before Phil was through security and then he wouldn’t see him.

Dan started the car, his breathing quickening as he struggled to grasp the wheel without feeling like his entire control was slipping like that night in the rain. He slowly pushed his foot on the brake and let out a long breath as he shifted the car into drive, and then he drove.

He actually drove…

His eyes followed the roads, this time they weren’t wet. They were just normal roads. They weren’t standing in his way. They were a gateway between him and the love of his life. And soon, the signs for the airport came into view and he couldn’t believe. He couldn’t believe that he was actually here. He had drove successfully.

The airport was busy tonight, like always. But Dan was glad that he got there when he did, quickly parking before running inside. He didn’t even take note of where he was. He just ran. He ran, not even worried about the jarring of his head as he did so. He had no idea where he was going. He didn’t know what airline Phil was even flying. But his instinct told him where to go. So he followed them, dodging people in the process.

And he soon ended up near the the American Airlines gate. Looking around, he tried his best to see if he could spot Phil, but he knew in his heart it was going to be too late. But much to his surprise…he saw a tall dark haired man, walking in the queue as he neared security, already striping off a black peacoat.

Dan ran over to the line, outside of the velvet rope, “Phil!” He exclaimed.

The man turned and he saw for sure that it was Phil, and his blue eyes bore into his soul. Phil jumped out of the line, hoping over the rope before he swung his arms around Dan and holding him close, “Don’t leave me,” Dan cried, “I can’t be without you, Phil. You need to stay in England with me.”

Phil kissed the side of his head, “Dan, I need to go back, I have patients waiting for me.”

“Then take me with you,” Dan cried, pulling back and looking at Phil, “Let me go back to America with you! We’ll go together!”

“That’s crazy,” Phil said, leaning in a kissing Dan’s forehead delicately, “Your family is here. You deserve to be here.”

“But I want to be with you,” Dan pleaded, “You saved my life. You gave me this new outlook on my life that I almost never had. I owe you my life, Phil.”

“That’s not a reason to pick up everything and leave,” Phil said, reaching up and rubbing Dan’s tear stained cheeks.

“Phil,” Dan paused and hesitated, “I love you. I love you a lot and I don’t want to live knowing you’re not here. Please, let me go with you or stay with me.”

Phil looked at Dan with so much love and admiration that Dan melted, “I love you too Dan, I figured it out the first day I saw you that you were special.”

“Then stay,” Dan whispered, “Or let me go with you.”

Phil nodded and leaned in, kissing Dan soundly in a breathless kiss before pulling back and looking at him, “I’ll stay, Dan, I’ll stay with you.” Phil was crying now. “God, I’m so stupid. We’re so stupid.”

Dan smirked at him, “Then let’s be stupid together.”

Dan wrapped his arms around Phil’s neck and yanked him close, crying tears of joy. He was so happy to hear Phil was going to stay with him. It’s all he ever wanted and now it’s happened.

They shared that special moment in the airport, a crowd gathered around them before they parted and left, in the car that Dan rented.

And Phil could never be more proud of him in that moment.

The clapping was loud, deafening almost. He saw the cameras around him, filming the scene in front of him as his name was announced and he walked out, looking into the studio audience and waving as he sat down on the white couch across from the host of Britain’s new top talk show host.

After that night at the airport, he and Phil sealed their relationship in breathless kisses and whispers. Phil moved his practice to England where he got his new license to practice while Dan worked on his recovery more and more everyday.

Eventually, Dan did exactly what he told himself he would do…and he wrote a book. He wrote a book that became the best selling work of fiction in the US and the UK and Dan was so astonished. His life was turned into such an anomaly that he had producers begging him for the rights to turn his book into a movie. And now he was on a talk show, sharing his life. In this time, he also had created a blog in which he has gained another massive following, but mostly from those who are looking at him as an inspiration to their own brain injuries and ways to get over it.

They called out Phil next, or Dr. Lester, and Phil walked out, waving at the cheering crowd around them. Dan smiled brightly at him, loving the look of his new husband as his ring glittered in the light. They married about six months prior, in a small intimate ceremony with both of their families. But it was perfect, and Dan wouldn’t have wanted it any other way.

The entire time at the talk show, Dan laughed and cried slightly along with everyone else as he talked briefly of his experiences. Phil went into some medical talk about the procedure he used to help Dan. And then they even showed some photos of Dan while he was still in the hospital.

By the end of the show, they asked Dan who he wanted to play him in the movie adaption, and Dan jokingly said “Evan Peters”, even though they looked nothing alike. He just loved him as an actor.

The show ended and he and Phil walked off from the stage and back into their room. They grabbed their bags and belongings before leaving and exiting the giant building. Instantly, Dan was bombarded by fans who had copies of his book and were asking for autographs.

Taking it one person in a time, Dan signed as many books as he could before he felt Phil’s hand on his back, telling him they needed to move on. But before they could, Dan spotted a young boy, about the age of six, looking up at him with giant eyes, his head wrapped in a bandage. He looked up at Dan and handed him his book, and Dan bent down, signed the book and asking for his name. The boy didn’t answer but the mom chimed in, “He’s mute. He has a tumor that is affecting his motor skills and he doesn’t speak. But I read to him your story and it’s given him such a positive look on life, even so young. You’re truly an inspiration.”

Dan felt tears brim his eyes as he reached forward and hugged the trembling boy. This was the reason why Dan did what he did. He now had a purpose for his life, one that he couldn’t see prior to the accident. His life was full of meaning that he couldn’t even comprehend.

And that’s all because of one doctor who decided he wanted to take a chance.

[almightyhollands]

Strip That Down

Pairing: Peter Parker x Reader

Request: Could you write a smut where the reader and Peter have thus HUGE sexual tension and one day at one party with the Avengers the reader starts to dance in a really sexy way (u can choice the song, show us your playlist) and everybody (especially the booooys) is looking at her which leads to a rough jealous Peter? Oh, and can u  make her Tony’s daughter? Just bc yes. I FUCKING LOVE U I’M ALWAYS CHECKING YOUR BLOG TO SEE IF YOU POSTED SOMETHING

A/N: HI I LOVE YOU OMG okay I know ive been slacking with the whole tagging thing but that ends now i promise okay ALSO I DON’T HAVE SEXY SONGS SO I LITERALLY HAD TO ASK MY FRIEND FOR A SONG SO IF IT ISNT SEXY IM SORRY

Peter stares at you from across the room, his lips pulled into a small frown as you ignore him. He knew that you knew he was here, you had sent him a small smile and a wave as soon as he walked in. He had immediately gravitated to you, as he always did, but you were already too busy with Steve. Peter resigned back to his seat, assuring himself that the two of you would find your way together sometime in the night, but three hours later, Peter isn’t too sure that he’ll even get to say a word to you tonight. You had been far too busy for him.

You and Peter had an interesting relationship. You were friends, pretty good ones at that, but there was an undeniable tension that pulled the two of you together. At first, it was uncomfortable, and you could barely stand to be in the same room as him, but eventually you two had fallen into a teasing pattern and it had just become your relationship.

Peter is ripped from his thoughts when an unfamiliar beat starts and you laugh loudly. He looks toward you to find you wrapped playfully in Clint’s arms, the two of you singing along loudly.

“You know I’ve been taking some time, and I’ve been keeping to myself.” Peter smiles at the two of you as you dance around the almost barren dance floor. The two of you continue singing along, Clint spinning you out of his arms as the two of you dance independently, and Peter knows you’ve been teasing him when your hips start swinging and you look to him, still singing. “You know I love it when the music’s loud, but come on, strip that down for me.” You sing to him, a mischievous glint flashing in your eyes.

Peter’s suddenly glad that Tony isn’t here, because if he could see the way that Peter (and every single other person in the room) was staring at his daughter, Tony might rip him to pieces. Peter bites his lip and you grin triumphantly from the dance floor, turning away from him. He stands quickly, indignance written across his face as he takes strides to meet you, his hand outreached to grasp your wrist. You turn and smile as though you’re surprised to see him behind you.

“Peter, hey!” You exclaim, and he glares at you.

“I need to talk to you.”

Without further questioning, you let Peter drag you off the dance floor, ignoring the beating of your heart and the whistling behind you. Peter stop as soon as the door of the elevator closes behind you, pushing his chest against yours and pressing your back into the cold metal of the wall. “Hi.”

“Don’t play innocent. I know you were teasing me.” He says, and though you know he’s trying to be dominant, his voice shakes very slightly. Instead of poking fun at him as you usually would, you stay silent. He drops his forehead to press against yours and lets out a small sigh of anticipation. “I’m going to kiss you.”

Instead of nodding, you desperately reach for his lips with your own, your mouths quickly meeting in a heated kiss. Peter moans in satisfaction and raises his hands to cup your face, pulling you closer. You grasp his wrists in your hands and open your mouth when his tongue runs across your bottom lip. You turn your head to the side and search the right button to press as his lips trail down your neck, finally resting on your collarbones. When the bell dings, informing you that you’ve reached the correct floor, you pull away from Peter and lead him to your bedroom, making sure your father was down in his office as he promised. You close the door behind you and turn around to face the panting boy behind you. Rushing forward, Peter grabs you by the hips and presses his lips to yours once again, leading you blindly to the large bed against the back wall of the room. You collapse when your knees hit the mattress, Peter falling on top of you.

“I’ve wanted this for so long.” He informs you, breaking away to unbutton his shirt and pull it off as you worked on the zipper of your dress. Peter, who is altogether inexperienced except for a few moments of intimacy he had shared with someone he couldn’t even bother to think about while you’re in front of him, is flustered. He’s pulled all his clothes off, save for his boxers, and he’s shell-shocked at the sight of you in only your underwear and bra. You squirm uncomfortably and he reach a hand out to grasp your wrist. “No, no. Y-you look, like, really n-nice.” He stutters, and you giggle, shaking your head.

Any discomfort you may have felt has now melted away as Peter pulls you to him and presses his lips to yours, his hands moving up your arms to the clasp of your bra. He fumbles with it for a moment before the two sides are falling apart and the straps are sliding down your arms. Peter’s hands move to cup both of your breasts in his hands and you moan as his thumbs move over your nipples. You toy with the waistband of his boxers, his mouth still attached to yours. He groans and pushes the lace of your underwear down impatiently, his middle finger immediately finding your clit.

Gasping with surprise, you grip his wrist as he rubs harsh circles against the bud of nerves, and he hums contentedly. “Good?” He asks, his voice is relaxed, and you marvel at the fact he was able to go from shaking to confident in less than ten seconds.

“Good. So good.” You moan as the tip of his finger slips from your clit to your opening, teasing you. Your hips buck up and he chuckles, pushing his finger slowly inside of you, and you let out a long string of his name. “Peter, Peter please.”

“Please what, baby?” He asks, and you aren’t even sure of the answer because of how quickly your mind is spinning. He hits a particularly sweet spot with the tip of his finger and you gasp loudly, your voice shaky when you reply.

“More, Peter. I need more, I need you.” You ramble, and he grins, pulling his finger out of you and quickly testing the taste on the tip of his tongue. “Peter, please.”

He nods and pushes his boxers down, standing up quickly and fumbling to get the fabric off of his leg. You bite your lip to stifle your giggle when he falls back on top of you and he smiles, rolling his eyes.

His face loses all emotion except determination once again as he rubs his tip and up down your slit, causing a groan to fall from your lips. “What do you want?” He asks, and you turn your head, burying your face in your pillows and already blushing at your words.

“I want you to fuck me.” You say timidly, but Peter doesn’t comment on your tone.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.” At your word, Peter pushes into you, pushing a loud moan out of your lips. You grip his biceps and he grabs your leg, pushing it up over his hips. You push his hips forward with the leg he had wrapped around himself and he lets out a loud groan, stilling when his hips are flush with yours. “Peter...” You whine, and he chuckles, grinding his hips against yours.

As stated before, Peter Parker was not an experienced boy. He had only had sex a handful of times, but he had a few tricks up his sleeve.

You cry out, a hand automatically reaching to Peter’s hair. He pulls his hips back, slamming them into you until your mouth is open but sounds are void. With one hand holding his weight by your head and the other gripping your headboard, Peter pounds into you with speed you weren’t sure was human. “Fuck, (Y/N),” Peter says, and you moan, far too into your own pleasure to listen to what he’s saying to you. When he hits a spot inside of you that makes your toes curl, you scream out and dig your nails into his shoulders.

“Peter, right there. Right there.” You repeat, and he nods, slamming his hips repeatedly into the same spot. Pete moves his hand from the headboard to your clit, rubbing firm circles until all you can see, feel, and hear is Peter. You cry his name and clench around him, causing him to groan and drop his head into the crook of your neck, breathing heavily and coming right after you.

As soon as he’s done, his arm gives out from below him and he falls you your side, wrapping an arm around you with an appreciative, “Wow.”

You giggle and nod. “Wow, indeed.” You smile, nuzzling under his arm. “Definitely worth the wait.” You say, and he chuckles.

“Agreed.”

TAGS: @the-things-i-do-for-love-1999 @focused-on-bands @yukanda-tsuyoi @randisnotonfire @free-the-fangirl @littlenerdgirl16 @kyleemartinez01 @cat-in-a-hoodie @ladysnowren @problemforfuturetech @thelovelyoldscentofabookshop @captain-blossom

[funkymeihem-fiction]

The A-Mei-Zing Outback Adventure- Chapter 22

Something was poking her repeatedly in the back and she tried to pull away, keeping her eyes closed and her posture lax. If she kept pretending to be asleep, maybe it would leave her alone. There was a pause, but then it continued, what felt like the tip of a finger curiously prodding between her shoulderblades.

“Stop that,” she moaned, still not moving.

Junkrat hesitantly shuffled closer, hot breath wafting across the back of her neck as he poked at her again with his remaining hand. “You real, darl?”

She draped an arm over her eyes tiredly, feeling the tug of the IV still taped in the meat of her elbow. “Yes.”

Junkrat huffed suspiciously. “Prove it. How do I know you’re the real Mei and not another dream. Say somethin’ only the real Mei would know!”

She had just woken up and it was entirely too early for this, but he was still poking her and not letting it rest, so she searched her still-foggy waking mind for something that would prove that Mei was Mei. She rolled onto her back, looking up at the blurry ceiling. “We were out in the desert together, near the shack. You blew apart a little cliff and made a heart for me. I kept one of the rocks.”

Junkrat was quiet for a long moment and she had thought the answer satisfied him, but he merely muttered a low “Did I?…Yeah. That’s an ace idea. Explodey heart sounds pretty romantic. I mean, seems like something I’d do. Did I do that?”

She sighed. His poor memory couldn’t seem to dig that one up, so she tried for something she knew he’d found more…eventful. “You blew apart the cliff, you made a heart, then you took a bath-”

“Got ya! I’d never willingly take a bath! I knew you wasn’t-”

“You did! So we could…you know…out on that blanket? We, um, you know, were together physically. What did you call it? Er, we rooted?” She pulled at the collar of her pajamas, and there was the mostly faded ring of a bruise in the shape of his teeth.

She could almost hear the gears grinding between his ears, quickly pulling that memory back to him. His face lit up, his grin returned, and his lanky arms moved around her, burying his face into her bosom and wiggling his pointed nose down until he was smothered between her breasts. Mei made a show of rolling her eyes slightly, but rested a hand on the back of his head, slowly petting over the few tufts of blond hair that remained. His eyes rolled up to her from where he was still buried face-first in her chest, gaze full of adoration, and when he spoke his voice was muffled. “Yeah! Yeah we did. Had a good time, I recall. Really good fuck. Yeah, won’t forget that one.”

“It was…a nice time,” she said politely, lifting her chin a bit. “So to answer your question, I’m really me. I came to visit you and Roadhog here in the outer clinic.”

“Oh…Yeah, guess the clinic part is real too, then. Damn. Listen, lovey, it’s good you showed up, I knew you’d come to help me out! I think Nana hid my parts somewhere around here. If we can at least get my arm back, can do a makeshift leg, can work with that.” He paused from where he had started trying to slip his hand into her pajama pants, blinking and extracting himself from her cleavage to actually look around him. He seemed distracted, and not really in a good way. “Lots of wiring here. Oxygen tanks too, probably. Heh. They think this is gonna stop the unstoppable Jamison Fawkes? Should leave a present for ‘em, I should. All right, listen up. Outer clinic’s attached on two walls, can probably blow our way out the left side into that practice field and we’re home free.” He pulled himself off her, lifting onto his arm and calling aloud, “Oi! Roadie, you still in here?”

There was a familiar grunt behind the curtains. “Mm.”

“Get ready to move, mate. Just give me a few minutes here at the most, and we’ll- Oi! Mei, what’re you-” He paused as her arms wrapped around him. “Ooh, had a taste and can’t get enough of ol’ Junkrat, eh? Uh, look, maybe a quickie after we get a distance from here, but-”

“That’s not what I meant!” Mei said quickly. She had made an attempt at physically latching onto him, wrapping both arms limply around his shoulders and trying to drag him back down into the bed, wheezing slightly. How could he possibly find the strength to be up and about and hatching more escape plans, when she felt so weak and sick? She was having trouble even just trying to cling to him, protesting aloud. “We’re not going to do any more escape attempts. We need to stay here, and do what the doctors say, and we need to get better. You need to get better!”

“I am better!” he snapped, lifting himself to sit up as Mei landed in his lap. “Roadie, get the things!”

“Hmm…” Roadhog rumbled behind the curtain again, but didn’t seem to move.

“You’re not!” Mei continued her sad attempt at a headlock, even if he barely seemed to notice. “You are not better yet, none of us are. Jamie would you please…listen!”

“I am listening! I can listen while I find my bits! And while I get these…fuckin’! Poisons! Outta me!” He flailed his single arm, yanking at the tubes that connected him to his drip, blood streaming from where it became dislodged. Mei drew back in alarm, eyes wide, and Junkrat took the opportunity to stand, taking a deep breath before flinging his leg over the bed and lifting upright. “I been fine before, I’ll be fine now! These goddamn-” His leg trembled and then abruptly crumpled beneath him, sending him to the floor with a painful sounding thud, and Mei could only watch in dawning horror as he curled up into a ball, holding his gut and retching up a mouthful of mostly clear greenish liquid that pooled beneath his open mouth.

She had just started to climb off the bed after him, unsure of how she was going to lift nearly seven feet of agitated junker, when the curtain was drawn back. Ana stood there, looking down at the twitching Junkrat with an unimpressed air and offering a calm “Amil ayh,” before pushing the rolling curtain aside fully. Despite her small size and being in her sixties, she leaned down to grip him under his amputated arm, heaving with all her might as she helped boost him mostly upright, leaving Mei quietly impressed. “I think you need to get back into bed, dear. And that’s just a friendly suggestion for now. Now rinse.” There was suddenly a cup shoved up under his nose, smelling of mouthwash and mint, and he begrudgingly took it down to slosh in his cheeks. “…And spit.” Back into the cup it went, and the junker fell into a fit of minty fresh coughing. Mei had the feeling this was far from the first time this had happened.

Ana struggled somewhat to roll him back into the bed, Mei pulling him back towards her. She grabbed at the edge of her sleeve, going to dab away the bile that had dribbled from his mouth, brows furrowed in worry. “Is he going to be all right? Jamie, please just get in and lay back down with me?”

“None of you have been able to keep much solid food down since the treatments started,” Ana said, moving to the foot of the bed to help lift his gangly leg back into place under the sheets. “Dr. Ziegler told us it would happen, along with an unpleasantly long list of side effects, but I’m afraid Mr. Fawkes has found it…disconcerting. And Jamison, next time I will not hesitate to put you out again.  Even you have better manners than this, I know. Especially when we have a guest who came all this way to see you.”

Junkrat let himself be guided back into bed. At least he had mostly stopped fighting, though he looked away from them both a little sullenly. “I’ve been puking my soul out, love. Fuck…Everything’s dry and scraping and black on the inside, I can feel it, and it doesn’t feel right. This isn’t like getting hurt regular. Never had it this bad, and I have felt some shit over the years. Would rather just keep the damn radiation! This ain’t treatment. It’s torture.”

“You always did have a flair for the dramatics. Save it for the actual battlefield and try to get some rest for now.” Ana said wearily. With practiced ease, she inserted the IV back into its port, wiping away the rivulets of blood, before pointing to her single eye and then back to him sternly. “Be good.” And with that, she pulled the curtain back around them and their semblance of privacy returned.

“You shouldn’t cause them so much trouble just for trying to help us. It’s just a part of getting better…” Mei muttered lamely, feeling rather lackluster in her attempts to comfort him when she wasn’t feeling any better herself. “You brought me here so I could get better, and both of you are going to get better with me. You brought me all the way-”

“You were dyin’, love! And you, you’re not like Hog and me. We can just…Me and him, we get better or we don’t, arright? But you’re not a junker. You’re too good, that’s why you gotta be here. You gotta get better so you can go out and do your world-saving things.” He looked almost as frustrated as she felt, and she knew they weren’t seeing eye to eye again. He continued on. “I did what I was supposed to do. I got you back safe, just like the mission brief said. Contract’s all done.”

“Oh no you don’t,” she shot back, narrowing her eyes behind her glasses. “You don’t get to do that to me.”

“Darl, I-”

“No. You may have completed a task for Overwatch, and I’ll make sure you’re paid for it. But you and I…we made a new contract out in that awful desert. You didn’t abandon me when I needed you, and I promised you I wouldn’t leave either. Well, we’re back, and I’m still not going to leave you.”

“I told you, that’s different! You’re different!”

“And I told you, we’re not that different after all. After all we went through, I’m not going to let you just…throw me back into Overwatch and then you be off on your way. I promised you I’d be here for you, so here I am. We’re all going to get better together.” She folded her arms in a very final way, as though that action alone would finish the argument.

“Arroight, now you’re just bein’ stubborn.”

“Oh, I’m the one being stubborn?!”

They both heard Roadhog sigh audibly from the other side of the room.

Junkrat squinted at her, lips screwing up and off to the side in an incredulous expression. She childishly scowled back at him. The two seemed to be in a face-off, even as they sat next to each other in bed, half under the covers. Petulantly, he shoved a little at her leg with his own, and she kicked him a little back, jostling him back into place. She elbowed him, then he elbowed her in retaliation. And before he knew it, when he looked back over at her, she was suddenly on top of him and his arm was looping around her, and she was kissing him almost viciously, and they moaned together as his tongue searched covetously between her lips. His grasp around her tightened, almost as if he was making sure she truly was real, and was delighted to feel familiar soft flesh under the rake of his fingernails. She clutched back at him in much the same way, something hurried and desperate, hungry for the smoky taste of his breath mingling with hers. He ground himself up into her, cursing inwardly at the layers of cloth between them as he moved to free his hand to take care of them, but she was suddenly pulling away again, trying to undo where their IV tubes had tangled together in their haste. He stared at her unsurely, panting a few breaths of air. Her glasses were askew and her gaze behind them were still annoyed and tired, but even he could see that there was something pleading underneath it.

“Jamie…please?” she whispered.

Everything inside him was liquified agony and his instincts were still screaming, echoing inside the hollow places in his skull that he needed to flee. He needed to get out of here, back to where the pain was present but manageable, where the poisons in him were at least familiar. With just him and Hog again, that was all he’d ever needed; a life where they answered to nobody, not even each other. He could blow his way out of here like he’d done with every other trouble, in the few years of his life he really remembered. Blow it up. Blow it all to hell.

But she’d just said please…

He uttered a little conflicted noise, eyes darting around the curtains that enclosed them and the flowers that had appeared alongside Mei’s very presence. She was still looking at him in a way that hurt him almost more than the doctor’s cruel medicine, and he found himself sinking slowly back into the pillows in a defeated posture. He couldn’t even blame this on the now absolutely raging boner she’d given him yet again. This was something genuine. She wanted him to get better, so he supposed that now…he had to.

“…Yeah…all right…”

The brightness returned to her tired features and she hugged herself back to his side, pressing a kiss to his jaw. “You promise me?”

He groaned. “Blimey, you’re twisting the only arm I got here, love. Fine. I promise ya.“

“Good! Very good, I’m sure together w-” she started to say, before he abruptly held up one finger.

“But on one condition! I hear they gotta give you all the free ice cream you want. No more cutting me off like in the dining hall, all the ice cream I want!”

“Erm, Jamie, I think that’s only for tonsils, or- You know what, fine. If that will help you with the treatments.” She sighed, shaking her head a bit. Maybe she would never really figure out the way his strange mind worked, and maybe that would be okay. “Just, no more escape attempts and no more trouble. Why don’t we tell Angela, and maybe we can get you and Roadhog moved back to the main base. With me?”

“Yeah! You and me and Roadie, we can be true blue bunkmates.” He managed a lopsided grin, baring his teeth before looking at her a little more thoughtfully, as the promises of ice cream were edged out of his mind. “You fierce little fuckin’ thing, guess you meant it when you was talking about staying with me…I mean, us, ya know?”

“Of course I meant it. I promised.” She lifted her chin a little, taking his hand under the covers and folding her fingers to entwine with his, grasping and holding them there. “And you promised too now, so…I won’t let you forget it!”

He gave her a rather sparkly-eyed look, flushing as if suddenly lovestruck all over again. “That’s my girl. You tell ‘em! And you tell me! That’s my Snowflake. Aw, you make me feel real funny on the insides, you know?”

Mei smiled up at him, but then noticed his flushed features seemed to be turning from pink to green. “Um, Jamie? That might not be me, that might be the medicine…”

His grin turned a bit shaky. "Oh…fuck,” he said haltingly, “Think y’might be ri-" before his head flopped forward and he promptly vomited right into her lap.

***

Junkrat’s frantic apologies lasted for what seemed like forever, an onslaught of panicked babbling while he repeatedly kept trying to take off his own pants to give to her, and only ceased when Ana returned with a fresh pair of pajamas for her to change into. Worse yet, she’d barely gotten one pants leg on before she heard the door hiss open on the other side of the room, followed by a barrage of irritated German words that heralded the return of Dr. Ziegler. Ana stepped in once more, though she quickly took Angela off to the side and Mei couldn’t quite hear what was being said.

Were they talking about her? Or Jamison, maybe?

She felt a little odd, though she wondered how much of that was the own underlying unpleasant nausea from her own treatments. Why did she still feel like a kid again, as though she kept getting caught with a boy her parents didn’t approve of? She’d never even had that experience before, her parents had always approved of her choices, always been proud and supportive of her. Then again, she’d never tried to bring someone like Jamison home before. Maybe it would have been different if she’d ever presented them with a radiation-mad Australian demolitionist that had just accidentally puked all over her.

But the way he’d looked at her, just before that…And he had promised…

“Mei?”

Angela was pushing aside the curtains, and Mei must have startled or had a strange look on her face, because the doctor quickly moved to take her shoulder as if to steady her, still speaking soothingly. “It’s just me. Ana told me about all of the recent…antics, here. You really should have waited for me to return, you know. Do you know how frantic I was, coming back and finding you missing from your bed? And then I found Winston lingering in the hallway-”

“Please don’t blame Winston!” Mei said quickly, brows furrowing as she watched the doctor examine the IV bag, replacing it with another one soon after. “He’s been through enough blame. I asked to come here and then made a fuss. I just wanted to check up on them.”

“I had a feeling you’d be here before I even spoke to him, actually. Have you and Mr. Fawkes come to terms? I’m sure you were told of the wheelchair incident? Among others?” She flipped through her folder. “When we hired the junkers, I was really hoping he would be exploding targets other than our own medical facilities.”

“I’m right bloody here!” Junkrat’s voice came from the other side of the curtain. “Fuck me, just cause I’m sorta deaf in one ear and maybe the other ear, doesn’t mean I can’t hear you!”

“We ah, we did talk things over. He’s agreed to do the treatments and won’t make cause any trouble, but I was hoping you wouldn’t mind if we moved them back to the main facility with everyone else? I mean, if there’s no more trouble, they could stay in the main ward with me. Also…” Mei coughed, taking off her glasses and wiping at them on her pajama shirt. “Alsoifhegetsalltheicecreamhewants.”

“That’s really more for tonsilitis and other-”

“I know, I really do. But could you approve it?” Mei clasped her hands earnestly. “They both helped me get out of that desert and it just…feels strange without them? Is that an odd thing to say? Ana says Mr. Roadhog’s been a model patient and Jamison promised me no more rocket wheelchairs. Would you consider it, please, Dr. Ziegler?”

Angela pursed her lips, brushing a lock of hair from her eyes, staring at the curtain as though she could see Junkrat straight through it. To Mei’s dismay, she did not readily agree to the idea of it. It took almost a full minute of silence before the doctor relented, waving a hand and starting to type into her medical monitor’s screen as it suddenly projected between them. “I will give this a chance, Mei-Ling. I’ve just put in the transfer and I’ll have them moved. But this means that I expect all three of you to be on your best behavior. If I hear so much as one little boom from the hospital ward…”

Mei smiled in relief. “Thank you, Dr. Ziegler!”

***

Sometime later, Mei was back in her wheelchair, being pushed by the ever-patient Angela. Beside them was Junkrat, shoved in a mass of gangly limbs into another wheelchair (without rockets), and being pushed by the massive wheezing form of Roadhog, his breathing a little more labored than usual and his pace a bit slowed. He had insisted on walking, and neither woman challenged it, if only to spare his pride. Junkrat, true to form, did not seem to notice his bodyguard’s distress, somehow finding the energy to keep rocking to and fro in his seat. “Gee! Haw! Mush, Roadie, mush! We can still get there by breakfast! Remember, we got a whole deal going here, all the sweetie treaties we can eat. You want chocolate or vanilla first? You think they got weird flavors like banana here? D’you ever think they’d name an ice cream after us? Y’know, us being real world-famous and all. Fudge RIPple? Rocky Roadhog? Cookies n’ CreamMei?”

“Do you ever shut up?” Roadhog grumbled, pausing to catch his breath and pretending to examine something on the horizon.

Angela looked amused as the younger junker fidgeted impatiently in his chair. “Say what you will about your methods, Mr. Fawkes, your ability to quickly recover from trauma is second to none.”

“That’s cause I’m the best at what I do, mate. At everything I do. Don’t get me wrong, I’m still…er…what’s the word for when you’re proud but like, you ain’t too proud?”

“Humility,” Angela supplied.

“Yeah, I’m real humiliating!”

Mei felt two sets of eyes upon her and there was a long pause to see who and if anyone would laugh first. Mei’s lips tightened and thinned, but she gently coughed and corrected him instead. “You’re not humiliating, you’re humble. I mean, you’re not humble, but that’s the word.”

Roadhog’s gigantic hand encompassed the entirety of Junkrat’s head and face before he could answer, bodily shoving him back down into his wheelchair. “Sit down.”

They traveled slowly across the length of the base, stopping occasionally so Roadhog could rest, and listening to Junkrat’s incessant chatter. By the time they reached the main ward, their beds had been made up, and even Mei’s flowers and cards had been fetched and put back in place. Roadhog shoved Junkrat’s chair just inside the door, headed right for the largest of the three beds, and uttered a muted rumbling groan that reminded Mei somewhat of a beached whale, before he went sprawling back, snoring before his masked head hit the pillow.

Angela, no-nonsense as ever, bustled about, helping deposit both Mei and Junkrat into their respective beds and hooking them up to the newest battery of machines and monitors. Blood was drawn, paperwork was filed, and she pulled up her rolling stool between their beds before they could even settle in. “Well, I’ve good news, at least. Winston’s rescue came just in time. It will take some time and yet more of these unpleasant treatments, and I’m afraid you will both likely lose the rest of your hair…even you, Jamison, although your eyebrows still need to be studied as a medical miracle for being as robust as they are after all this…But we should be able to repair the damage done to your organs, purge the radiation eventually, and remove Mr. Fawkes’ multiple melanoma cancers and other issues.”

She paused, and then slowly reached down to pull two white buckets from under their beds, setting them nearby with a little hollow clunk. “The bad news is that you’re still going to be spending quite some time here, and the side effects are still going to be unpleasant. But I assure you they’ll be manageable. We’ll do everything we can to make sure you are all comfortable. Now, I want you both to follow Agent Roadhog’s example and try to get some rest. Die ordnung wahren.” There was a sudden rapid beeping from her phone, and she nodded fiercely to them before turning and hurrying from the ward.

Mei gave a little side glance to Junkrat, and found that he was already peeling the covers off, swinging his leg back down to the freezing cold floor and grasping onto his IV stand for support, scraping and hopping his way over. Mei scooted to one side, already making room for him, and when he struggled in over the bar on one side, she pulled the blankets over them both and moved right back up against him.

He wrapped one arm carefully around her, massaging one broad hand into the back of her shoulders idly. “Still don’t like the idea of bein’ stuck in this place, you know?”

“I know,” she said, snuggling into the crook of his elbow and resting her head on his bony chest, listening to the hiss of his lungs working and the always-rapid thudding of his heart. “But I’ll be here.”

“But y’know how I get. What if you’ll get annoyed with me, love?”

“Probably. We’ll probably annoy each other,” Mei murmured, tilted her head slightly to look up at him.

“But you ain’t worried?”

“No.”

He mulled that over, lips mouthing idly at the top of her headscarf, pecking not-quite-kisses to her head in thought. “Huh. Well, if you ain’t worried, I ain’t worried.”

“Good. Also, I think my ice cream would be more of a pepper-mei-nt.”

His eyes lit up again, although at least this time there wasn’t any sickness to follow. He pressed more kisses to her face and forehead, pulling her up closer still. “Oh, that’s awful! We should make a list of these for Roadie when he wakes up. You know, get to work annoying each other proper-like.”

“I guess we do have an open schedule for a bit,” she said, tilting her face up so his kisses would start landing on her lips instead. “Although it sounds like none of us are going to have very much fun. Maybe some of the others will start visiting us? That should help pass the time, I’m sure we’ve…missed a lot…in almost five months...” Her gaze started to go dark and distant once more, only to be jolted out of it a moment later when a set of sharp teeth closed together to nip her on the side of her jaw.

“Oi. Come back, darl, don’t get like that again. You were just taking a nap, but this time we were there with you, right? We were all together, still are. Cause we promised, right? You said you’re not going to let me forget, yeah?” He tilted his head, his strange golden gaze peering into hers.

“R-right.”

“Too roight. Now, who’s ready for some unlimited ice cream!”

[ablackwomansurvivingrape]

I Made A Baby With the Devil: A Black Moms Story of Parenting and Domestic Abuse

By MICHELLE BOND

Many years ago, I met a man who seemed normal, but was actually the devil. Well, not literally the devil. He was more like the guy the devil would turn to when he needed to be amused or inspired. This escaped me when we met and I fell in love with him. I thought, Yes! This is who I wish to create a child with.

I should have seen the red flags—there were plenty. I can see them clearly now, but the thing about red flags is that they wave quietly, like a soft whisper. Red flags should come with loud horns or a Justin Bieber CD—you know, something that makes the soul shudder and ache. But no, they just wave back and forth like a gentle tropical breeze, caressing the illusion of happy and cloaking poor judgment.

When I was pregnant, my son’s DNA provider promised me that he would stop being verbally and physically abusive. I should have known he was lying when he also promised me world peace and a moon-walking Unicorn. Domestic abusers don’t stop the violence because their women are pregnan; in all-too-many cases, they increase it. But I believed every word he said. It was easier to believe and accept this fantasy instead of facing the life I had created for myself.

I clung to denial as if it were my security blanket and avoided reality during my entire pregnancy. He was the local Karaoke King, and charmed both men and women each night. They figured since he had a sweet and sensational voice that meant he had a soul. In public we looked like any other couple. It was easy; we both had our scripts and knew our lines well. His role was to play the devoted soon-to-be father, doting over me and my every need, collecting kudos and pats on the back from his karaoke fans. My role was to smile and nod and pretend that the person on the stage was the same person I was going home with. There was no need to explain any scratches or bruises as they were well hidden. He knew how to land his fists and I knew how to dress accordingly.

The day my son was born I said that I wanted to stay with my mom for a few days, as I knew nothing at all about taking care of a newborn infant. This was enough to create an explosion in the hospital. Yelling at me through grinding teeth, he repeatedly hit my arm where the IV went in. Needless to say, when my son and I left the hospital, we went to our apartment and not my parent’s home.

I spent the first night with my new baby alone, with no one to help me and with no food in the house. The proud father spent the night out collecting “congratulations” from his Karaoke fans.

I fear that my inability to forgive him is because I do not forgive myself. While I love my son with the totality of my heart, I know deep down that this man should not have been my son’s father. I feel such shame for inviting this monster into my life.

My son should be here. His life has purpose. But I regret allowing this man the platform to say the word “father.”  Every time he does, the word should slide down his throat like a razor.

My boyfriend who has been my best friend for close to 17 years was listening to me vent one day. Instead of joining me in my hate-fest, he told me that I need to forgive this bama. He told me, “The hate that you have for this person is not hurting or affecting him, as he has moved on with his life.”  And the more hate you have only binds your own love. It holds you back from being who you are trying to be.

Love.

Love always seems to be the answer.  I know that had this man at any point been there for my son, I would’ve had the strength to stop poking needles in my DNA-Voodoo Doll.  I remember telling him, “Don’t worry about the child support. Do what you can. Just be there for the baby.” He chose to provide neither child support nor presence for my son. He chose to not be a man. Love, huh?

As I write this, I am reminded of this quote: “Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one getting burned.” — The Buddha

I am hopeful that one day I’ll write a follow up article to share the wonders and power of love. But for today, I will embrace the hot coal and endure the pain.

[miss-shojo]

A Cenjo Drabble

((just a little angst that I wanted to write about Shojo and @glowingeyedmadman. Triggers: kidnapping, electrocution, gun violence, chocolate pie. Enjoy~))

She had gone out to the store over an hour ago. It was just a few blocks down the street so even she couldn’t get lost. But it had been an hour.  Then two hours.  Then three.  Centarus glared at the clock as if it had something to do with this. She was just lost. No reason to get upset. He grabbed a light jacket and his shoes, and started walking down the road to get to the store.  One block down, nothing suspicious.  Two blocks down, still zip.  Three blocks in and Centarus came across an abandoned shopping bag just lying on the sidewalk. He poked inside and found a bar of dark chocolate, butter, cream, and flour. 

“No, I’m making you a pie and that’s final. Because I want to! Because you deserve it. I’ll make it chocolate- dark chocolate, okay? I’ll be right back.”

The butter was already soft. Centarus stood up and looked around for other clues. There were no tire tracks, nothing else that belonged to her, no bread crumbs of any kind. He started to walk back to his home, his pace quickening as he tried to come up with a plan, when he saw someone approach his door with an envelope. The two made eye contact and the man bolted like his life depended on it. And it did. 

Centarus easily caught up to the scrawny man, grabbed his shirt, and threw the man over his own head, upside-down, and smashing on to the concrete. The man groaned in pain, dazed from the throw, and Centarus snatched the letter from his hand. Inside was an address and a cryptic message: sixty minutes or she dies. 

“What the hell is this?” Centarus asked the man as he came to. 

“Ah.. fuck man...”

Centarus pushed his foot down on the man’s head. 

“I said, what the hell is this?” he repeated as the man screamed. 

“M-My boss! He’s got your dumb- AH SHIT! Fuck.. We took her. Just.. Just go to the address.”

Centarus had half a mind to continue pressing until the man’s head popped but he controlled himself. The address wasn’t far. He stepped over the whining man and took the car the crony came here in and was off. He may have let that man live but he sincerely doubted he’d be able to show that kind of mercy again.

The drive ended up taking a good forty-five minutes to an older building downtown. The address told Centarus to go to the second-level basement and he soon arrived at a long, ominous hallway. Multiple doors lined either side, as well as a few extra corridors with doors of their own. Centarus started down the main hallway, listening closely when suddenly from the right hand hallway he heard her voice. 

“Cen! Cen, help me!” He broke into a run, following her voice. He traveled further down and then.. nothing.  “Cen! Please, hurry!” It came from behind. He ran, taking the left hallway instead.  “Cen!” Right. Left. Down.  “No, please!” He ran faster.  “Stop! NO!” Her voice was all around him. She was crying.  “Cen.. Cen, help...” “SHOJO!”

Centarus punched in every door he came across, swinging madly, seeing red, desperate to find her, desperate to viciously rip apart whoever or whatever was making her cry out like that. Her voice got louder. His anger grew. Door after door he searched until- 

He entered a large room with two or three dozen armed men lining the walls with two or three important looking men in suits at the center, standing by the room’s centerpiece: a young woman strapped to a table, propped up for all to see, with several stuck on wires connecting her to a large battery on a nearby table. She was drenched in sweat, bleeding from her mouth and nose, and momentarily knocked out. Her chest rose and fell weakly, and she whimpered in her sleep. 

The men turned to Centarus as he entered, sneering at the Chronan’s intense reaction. One of them pressed a button on his phone and Shojo’s recorded voice rung out, crying for Centarus. 

“She didn’t want to at first so we had to persuade her to, uh, help us out,” he chuckled, slipping the phone into his pocket. “But now let’s get down to business. I’m sure that you-”

Centarus charged with a raging yell but the armed men ran at him, all together holding him back away from the suits. They were obviously no match for Centarus, a few of them being flung across the room and a few others getting their necked snapped, but he paused when Shojo began screaming. Another suit, holding the remote for the battery, activated the electric current at a higher voltage. Her suffering only lasted a few seconds but it left her shaking and sobbing quietly. Her eyes fluttered open and she could just make out Centarus surrounded by cocked guns to his head, fuming and staring right back at her. 

“C.. Cen....” she called out meekly, her tears dropping down into her blood. 

“Don’t worry, baby. I’m coming,” he replied, blinking as that familiar shadow crept in around the walls of the room. He didn’t give a damn. Let it come. 

“As I was saying, Chronan,” the man continued gruffly, keeping his hand on the remote as he spoke to Centarus. “I’ll keep this brief. You are here for the girl. We are here to make you a deal. If you want her to remain alive you will give us your suit. Any questions?”

“Actually, yeah. Can we hurry this up? My girlfriend was planning on making me a chocolate pie and I’m kind of looking forward to it.”

No one in the room knew how to respond to such a comment. 

“This guy is fucking nuts,” one of the men muttered to a buddy. 

The shadowy figure loomed closer, a maniacal smile playing across its face. 

“Yeah. I am.”

Centarus threw up his pistols and shot on either side of him, hitting with terrifying accuracy. Any bullets the goons shot at his head felt like nothing more than a tickle and Centarus laughed in their faces. The shadow laughed along side him, egging him on to not leave a single one alive. Two of the suited men were quickly escorted away, knowing full well that they fucked up. The last man with the remote grinded his teeth and activated the voltage again. 

“Do you want her dead, Chronan??” he threatened over the sounds of bullets and Shojo crying in agony. “Stop this insanity at once or I’ll-”

Centarus shot the man directly in his face, grinning all the while. He jumped up over another goon, landing on the remote to smash it to pieces, and turned to face the remaining lackeys. They took one look at the madman with the guns and turned to run. 

“Ooh ho, I don’t think so,” Centarus growled, shooting anyone remaining in the room with a rapid fan of the hammer. His blood ran hot, his adrenaline pumping. He missed this feeling. The shadow agreed, floating around the dead bodies with glee. This is what he was meant for. This was- 

“Cen..”

The Chronan snapped back to the present and turned to see Shojo still strapped to the table, her bound hand reaching out for him. Her eyelids drooped, whatever strength left over fading fast, and the shadow dissipated. Centarus holstered his guns and tore the leather straps and electrical wires off, quickly scooping Shojo’s shaking, frail body into his arms. 

“Hey, it’s okay. It’s okay, I got you,” he told her softly, stepping over the multiple bodies to leave the room. “You just stay awake, okay? Sleeping can happen later. Much later. After chocolate pie.” 

Shojo struggled to focus on his glowing eyes, starting to see shadows herself. Centarus pursed his lips and broke into a quick jog to get out of the basement faster. She didn’t have much time. 

“Sho, tell me about the pie you wanna make,” he insisted, making it to the stairs and taking them two at a time. “Tell me how to make it.” 

“Y..You said.. you wan..ted... chocolate.. So I.. I got some,” Shojo mumbled. “I.. I think I.. dropped it... I’m sorry...” 

“Don’t be sorry. You can make another one,” Centarus assured her, getting into the car he stole and gently placing her in the passenger seat, making sure her seatbelt was fastened. He placed a small kiss on her forehead and brushed her hair out from her pale face. 

“Hey, can you smile for me?” he asked. It took her a moment to process but she smiled weakly up at him. He gave her another kiss and hopped over to the driver’s seat, gunning it and not giving a fuck about the other drivers on the road. He held her hand as he drove, prompting her to tell him more about the pie and about what Centarus wanted to do after the pie. Shojo managed to let out a tiny laugh at his idea of using her as his plate. 

“You.. You’ll make a.. a mess,” she said. 

“Which I fully intend on cleaning up. With my tongue.” 

“Y..You goofball...” 

“What? It’s way more fun than washing dishes the normal way. I have one request though: can we add whipped cream? To both the pie and to you? Sho?”

Her head leaned forward. Centarus panicked. He pulled over, still in the middle of the street, and put his fingers to her throat to find her pulse. He sighed in relief. A weak pulse was still a pulse but he didn’t feel like having her fall into a coma any time soon. 

“Sho? Shojo? Wake up,” he called out to her, holding her face in his hand. His thumb stroked her cheek, brushing away a stray tear. He searched the car for something to drink and found nothing. Cars started honking at Centarus from behind and the Chronan shot them the bird before driving off. He held Shojo’s hand for the rest of the drive home, his hand squeezing hers in worry. 

Centarus brought Shojo inside to Doc Matthias were she was quickly put on IV and heart monitors. All seemed unnervingly calm as Centarus helped to clean her up, watching her heart slowly regain its usual rhythm. Doc insisted that Centarus do something while he waited, lest he lose his mind again, so he put himself up to the ultimate task: make his girlfriend a pie. 

Through some sort of miracle, Shojo woke up a few hours later and Centarus ran into the room to see her sitting up and drinking some medicinal tea. She beamed at the sight of him and set her tea down, reaching out both her arms to him. He held her close, mindful of the IV still in her arm, and stroked her hair. She started to cry and Centarus shushed her, pulling back to kiss the tears off her cheeks. 

“It’s alright, you’re safe,” he said, setting her back down as she smiled through her glossy eyes. Her lip trembled and her smile broke. 

“Cen.. I.. I was so scared,” she sobbed as he wrapped his arms around her. “They.. They just grabbed me and pulled me in, I didn’t know where I was, and I-”

“Shh, it’s okay. Don’t think about it.”

“They said I bait for you to do something with your suit. I don’t know what but I.. I’m sorry, Cen..”

Centarus pulled her back to look her in the face. 

“Hey. Don’t you dare apologize to me. You understand?” he said sternly. She nodded and rubbed at her eyes. He reached over to give her some tissues, helping her to blow her nose. 

“There. All better. Hm?” He smiled at her and waited until she mirrored his smile to lean forward to kiss her, holding her face tenderly. She eagerly kissed him back, leaning into his hand lovingly. 

“Are you hungry? I made you something,” Centarus offered. 

“You made me something?” Shojo asked curiously. Centarus dashed off to the kitchen for a moment and returned with a slice of what looked like chocolate pie. 

“Made by yours truly.”

“Oh, Cen, you’re too sweet.” She took a bite and stopped after one or two chews, looking over at Centarus with a very forced smile. “It’s... um. Really interesting.” 

Centarus was not fooled. He took a bite of it himself and made a similar face, using a tissue to spit it out. “How did I fuck this up?! There were three ingredients!” 

“Well, there’s more than three ingredients. Did you happen to mix up the salt and the sugar?”

Centarus paused. “Maybe.”

“And what kind of milk did you use?”

“Buttermilk.” 

Now Shojo paused. “Cen, honey, no.” 

“Wha- Then why the fuck is it called buttermilk?? Why do we even have it?! What are you suppose to use it for if you-” Shojo pulled him down for another kiss, smiling up at him with a giggle. 

“I love you,” she said and the savage beast was calmed. He dumped the slice of cake into the trash and scooted Shojo over so he could lay in the bed with her, holding her protectively. 

“Can I still make you a chocolate pie?” she asked. 

“Only if I get to eat it off of you.”

“Deal.”

The Chronan smiled and settled in for a nap with Shojo nestled safely in his arms. It was where they both belonged. 

[uoipaio]

Andrew had noticed Declan favoring an arm since they had gotten up that morning. He only seemed to use his left, which wasnt normal for him, and would wince when he tried to do anything strenuous with his right. He asked him several times what was wrong and each time got him a grunt or an off handed ‘I’m okay’, but after the third time of him almost dropping a fur bundle, the doctor had enough. He stomped up to the man double his size, and laced his fingers into his, dragging him over to their tent, where the others couldnt eavesdrop.

“Drew, what are you doing, Im busy right now.” Andrew didnt give an answer, just turned around once in the tent to close the flaps, then turned back to Declan. He walked around to his back, and started poking and groping at his arm and shoulder. “Stop that.” Declan turns away some, but didnt put in any real effort, as he could easily get away from the small man beside him if he very well pleased.

“Turn back around.” Andrews voice was deep and serious, unlike his normal light and sugary tone, and Declan knew that meant he wasnt his lover right now but a patient.

“Okay doctor.” Declan sarcastically said and turned his back to the man again, but kept his eye on him over his shoulder. Andrew stretched up on his toes to see and reach where declans shoulder and neck met, poking his nimble fingers into the large muscles there. He moved down to behind the neck, and finally reached right above the shoulder blade when Declan winced. He gently rubbed the length of the muscle, the whole time declan curled the shoulder into himself more and more.

“What happened.”

“Did something when I threw a redcoat off of me yesterday.” Andrew lowered back down onto his heels and grabbed Declans hand once again, leading him to the bed of furs laid out on the ground. He grabbed his bad shoulder and pulled him down to sit. “Okay okay I get it, no need to be so rough.”

“You should have told me yesterday, I could already be treating you. You are so fuckin’ stubborn, Declan Harp.” Declan chuckled at that, he always though it was funny that the doctors normal speech was sweet and soft, yet his bedside manners were always so abrasive and hard. It wasnt too much of a surprise that he never got far in an office, but an attitude like that was invaluable out in the harsh frontier. “Stay right here. Ill be back, and be shirtless when i return.”

“Yes sir.” Declan dryly stated, earning a glare from Andrew as his left the tent. When he got back, Declan was indeed shirtless and laying on his side, head propped up with his good arm. Andrew carried a small clay container with him which he placed in the ground next to the bed. He kneeled down next to Declan and brushed a few stray hairs out of his face before leaning down and pressing a gentle kiss on his lips.

“Lay on your stomach.” He whispered against the rough lips. He received an affirmative grunt and the mountain of a man shifted to lay as told. Andrew got up and straddled his hips, splaying his hands out onto the large toned back laid out before him. He traced his thin fingers along the ten long cuts on either shoulders, not done too long ago by Benton, and other scars along the stretch of his back. After a few minutes of his hands exploring, Declan had all but melted into his touch, and Andrew went to work. He grabbed the pot he brought and opened it, grabbing a small handful of the goo inside. He started by warming it on his hand some, then painted it onto the skin above the muscle that was pulled. He gently kneeded the ointment into the tanned skin, careful not to put too much pressure. The fragrance surrounded them both, a strong mint scent with undertones of lavender and chamomile. He moved onto the rest of the shoulder, applying deeper pressure, focusing on spots that were tighter.

“I didnt tell you because I didnt want you to worry about something so small.” Declan’s voice is barely above a whisper, but easy enough to hear in such close quarters.

“Im going to worry no matter what, not telling me when somethings wrong just makes me mad.” He pressed down hard against a larger knot that he found, making declan hiss in through his teeth. “Sorry.” He stroked the spot in apology and moved on to focus on the mid back.

“Ill remember that for next time.” andrew hummed in approval, and kept up with his massage. After a good ten minutes he was satisfied with his work, having rubbed out most of the knots in his lovers back. He rubbed his hands from the bottom of his spine all the way to the stop, leaning down to press a soft kiss to the back of his neck.

“You can turn over now.” Whispered Andrew into his ear. Declan looked back at him and smirked, flipping over onto his back while the smaller man stayed on him. Andrew leaned back down once Declan was situated and felt a hardness underneath him, causing a blush to rapidly spread from his neck to his cheeks, making the dark freckles there pop.

“I really enjoyed what you did for me.” Declan bucked his hips up to emphasize his point. Andrew giggled and stabilized himself by both hands on declans chest, while grinding back down against Declans length. He smiled wider at the groin that earned him.

“My pleasure, ill do you anytime.”

“Do you feel up to some repayment right now?” Declans large hands came to rest on Andrews hips, which he slid under his shirt to grip at the pale skin there.

“Like i said, anytime.” Andrew leaned down for a kiss. They started out soft, just feeling each others lips, but as usual andrew quickly became impatient and started undoing declans pants. Once he got them open, he shoved his hand in them, not even waiting to pull them down. He wrapped his hand around declans length, loving to be able to feel his heat again. Declan groaned and began undoing andrews shirt, but with only one good arm, gave up and just pulled it over his head, breaking a button or two along the way. He ran his good hand down his chest, feeling his body along the way til he started undoing andrews belt and pants. Andrew lifted himself off declans hips to take off the clothes, kicking them off to the side while declan did the same. Andrew immediately sat back down, now grinding against declan with nothing in between. Declan threw his head back, letting out a deep moan and bucking up against andrew as well as he could.

“Fuck youre so wet already I can feel it”

“Ive been thinking about since i got back in and you were shirtless. Are you ready?” Andrew lifted up a bit to align himself with declan, but waited for the okay. Declan nodded and Andrew sank down, almost taking his whole length in one go. They both let out a moan, though andrews louder. “Fuck Declan! God damn you are so big.” Declan dug his fingers into Andrews hips, trying his best not to thrust up into his tight heat yet. Andrew sank farther and farther down until their hips were flush against eachother. He moaned, loud enough for everyone around the tent to hear, and lifted himself back up just to take the length again. He started at a slow pace, moans getting louder as he went faster.

Declan tried to grab him hips and put some effort in too, when andrew pushed down on his stomach to stop him. “Let me do this” andrew got out between moans. He kept picking up speed, finally getting to a pace that he really liked. He threw his head back, high moans and declans name spilling from his lips. His thighs started to burn but he was so close, he could feel declans thick length twitching, so he was close too. Declan reached his hand to rub against andrews clit, throwing him over the edge in secondsand declan following close. Andrew took all of declan in, grinding his hips into his to ride out both of their orgasms. He fell forward to place a breathy kiss against declans lips, which was happily returned.

“I thought i was suppose to be the one repaying you” declans voice is heavier than usual, brain still fogged over. Andrew climbed off of him to lay against his side, too tired to clean them up yet. He wrapped his arm over declans chest and declan pulled him closer to rub his hand against his bare side, still damp with sweat.

“I didnt want you to pull anything else, old man.” Declan let out a load laugh at that, eyes crinkling as he smiled down at andrew.

They spent a few more minutes laying against eachother before Declan had to get back to work. Andrew stayed next to him the rest of the day, making sure his lover was careful with his arm and barking at him whenever he tried to do anything too strenuous. Declan huffed and glared at him every time, but andrew would glare right back, always winning. Most men wouldnt dare back talk a man like Declan Harp. but Andrew wasnt like most men.