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#the wait and price was totally worth it
maruneia · 11 months
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after almost 3 months of waiting it's finally home 😭😭😭😭!!!!!!
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narutomaki · 25 days
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hey genuine question here: why does it cost me nearly 80$ to ship art from an American store regardless if size but under 1kg ... but it (would) costs me under 60$ to get 0.7kg of (art) stuff from Japan? both I'd be getting charged the same amount of import fees on if any.
#is shipping just THAT cheap on the Japanese side of the equation?#im so fucking confused#i mean trust me i was more confused when i was like oh yay a sale i will order 2 print and 1 pin from ray#why is the shipping 150 dollars 🧍‍♂️? (pre covid).#that was the at check out price estimate. deranged. any way.#the items themsleves cost like.... 25$? idk wtf was going on in the back end or if it was a calculation error or a surcharge due to holidays#but i have never even seriously considered even thinking abt looking into ordering any of his merch again LNAO#ray can you please just send it yo me folded up via letter mail? ill unfold it. its okay. skip any fancy packaging#any way my fav japanese fox artist opened an international store and i have a cart worth 172$ after shipping costs waiting for me#once i get my tax refund (i will probably not end up buying any of it)#(i can not justify that expense)#(but i wpuld very much like them. the shipping isnt even an issue. its about half the total cost. which. its coming from japan. Yeah. Duh.)#lays down. fox.#they have three little charms i want to bad. i want essentially yheir entire stock. there liks 3 things i dint rlly want and even then im#like idk maybe i do kinda#also asidr aside they have a piece of three toxes that sent a bilt if sheer terror theough me but i added it to my cart and thiught#well if i invite the three sisters in they canthurt me#all defiant.#and well the fear left#why did no one tell me it was that easy#unralted to the three sisters food crop#more related to the three sisters greek wiyh the eye ball except they are thosw girls#these are specifics spectres that haunt me and only me to try and rip my soul from mybkdy when i least expect it#but suddenly im lime. nah rn? wete good :) they cant hurt me! i invited them in! that would be rude of them. and they cant be rude!#i havent slept in. almost 24 hours now and i barely slept last night i am getting too old for this (is 27)
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cordeliawhohung · 7 months
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the mafia boys taking their girls shopping for lingerie!!
(shy!reader getting flustered by everything meanwhile mafia!simon is just thinking about how gorgeous she’ll look 🫣🤭)
oh goodness the poor girl would be so flustered!
i'm sure at first it started out innocent. you needed a new bra after the strap on your favorite one went haywire, that was it! it wasn't your fault that the sluttiest lingerie you had ever seen in your entire life was on display in the store! and at first it was fine. Simon just followed you around as you perused your simple bras, but he just couldn't keep his eyes off the teddys. there's a baby pink one that catches his eyes at first, something frilly with bows, but it's the black, lacy one that really catches his attention.
when he points it out, you tell him that you're fine with just getting a few sets of bras, you don't need anything fancy, and he hears none of it. he's picking out several styles just to see what you end up liking better, totally guesstimates your size because he flustered you and you won't give it to him. of course he pays for it all, too, and that shit is not cheap. like several hundred dollars worth of lingerie for you ): but god he cannot stop thinking about what you'd look like wearing it. he just knows the lace and straps will complement your body perfectly, ugh. this all is definitely what happens before this drabble here lmao
with Price, i feel like it's a lot easier because you two know one another just too damn well. honestly, half the time he buys you lingerie without you even there just because he knows your size and style preferences so well, so it's not uncommon for you to come home to something new laid out on the bed for you. you've learned he's really partial to red. like that classic, bright red. it really gets him going.
every now and then he'll actually take you out shopping for it though, and believe it or not you're the menace in this situation. through some way or another, you've learned that crotchless panties are his favorite, and as you're looking through them you mutter the most risque filth to him. then you've got your poor husband all hot and bothered in the middle of a lingerie store and you take your time. do not be surprised when the two of you get home and he doesn't even wait for you to try on the items he bought you before fucking you, the poor man waited long enough.
when it comes to Johnny, it's a little different. okay, a lot different, because the first time you let him take you shopping for lingerie is when you're forcing him to apologize. not for anything nefarious, he just owes you after decimating your favorite lingerie. when you had worn it to surprise him the night before, you hadn't expected him to react like a wild dog. he had all but torn the lace to shreds in order to get to your cunt, and when you tried to tell him how expensive that set was, he shut up your complaints by bullying his cock into you ):
so he quite literally pays for it the next day, but he doesn't mind. he still isn't sorry about ruining the first pair, and really, taking him shopping only gives him more ideas about how he could ruin more pairs. he likes the sheer babydoll sets, and buys you at least three different versions of them. when the two of you leave the store, you've basically come to an agreement that he's supposed to leave one specific pair of your choosing in tact, but since he bought the other ones he can tear them up to his hearts content next time you decide to surprise him.
with gaz it's a little different just because your relationship together is not at all normal. some sort of strange enemies, yet still friends, yet still not makes it a little difficult for him to buy you lingerie, let alone take you with him as he buys you some. but lets say for the sake of our hearts the two of you are actually together and you're not being a brat about it lmao
this man loves silk. i just know it. silk anything. he likes the texture, he likes how shiny it is, he likes the way it falls around your body, he loves all of it. especially slips. a mini slip with a little slit in the side trimmed with lace? god if you wear that around him he's going to hike up the skirt and fuck you, i don't make the rules and neither does he, it's just some primal urge that overwhelms him. like imagine you're getting ready for bed in the bathroom and you're wearing a cute little slip and the lights are dimmed because it's late and you just watch as he approaches behind you. and this man is patient. sure he's got his hands resting on your hips as you brush your hair or wash your face or something, but he's gonna wait for you to finish your routine before dragging you off to bed. (or maybe he just fucks you over the bathroom counter, who knows, certainly not him).
i got a little carried away but enjoy these thots 👍
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paradiseprincesss · 2 months
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dangerous woman | jonathan crane
i'm sure everyone is familiar with the album cover of "dangerous woman" and what she's wearing on it. if you don't, then i feel like the outfit and nickname won't make sense in this fic !!!
summary: you've been stealing the scarecrow's fear toxin for months, and finally, he catches you red handed.
warnings: smut, p in v, bondage, rough sex, general adult content lol, MDNI 18+ only
word count: 3.1k
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you’d been stealing the scarecrow’s fear toxin for months now — and you knew it was only a matter of time before he found you. 
it was profitable, okay? you would steal his supply, leaving him empty handed, and selling it at a much higher price to the criminals of gotham city. easy money, light work. simply put, you were running him out of his own business. 
jonathan was growing increasingly more frustrated with this mysterious thief that was stealing his supply — it’d been months and yet he couldn’t catch the guy. “the guy” — yes, he thought perhaps this was the work of one of the many dangerous men in gotham. 
this type of organized, deliberate crime couldn’t possibly be done by a woman working all alone — wrong. he was so wrong. this was exactly the type of crime that would be committed by a woman such as yourself. he was a psychiatrist for crying out loud, shouldn’t it be in his job description to know personality types? 
jonathan had his goons working overtime, keeping a keen eye on the drug shipments, but it was no use — you were one step ahead of jonathan every time. jonathan was ready to snap his glasses in two at this point. for someone who was trained in human behavior and complex criminal psychology, you would think he would be able to detect a pattern by now. 
tonight, you had big plans — you were going to steal his toxin from his warehouse directly.
forget shipments and hideouts, this time you were going big or going home. it was all or nothing — and right now, you wanted it all. 
your fitted, latex, corset-esque bodysuit clung to your figure as did your matching, latex thigh-high pleasers. the cherry on the top was the black bunny ears you accessorized with.
sure, it was a little risque, even bordering on kinky, but hey — it screamed dangerous woman. it was like wearing a caution sign but in the best way.
something that said: “i bite.”
dressed in your usual attire, you head to his warehouse in the dead of night. you sacrificed a prolific amount of late nights to figure out the location of this warehouse, but it would all be worth it once you were drowning in piles of cash after profiting off of his toxin. 
you’d been watching him for months — you even knew where he lived. you knew his profession, his full legal name, where he grew up, what type of food he ordered the most when he got takeout…
but what can i say? you were dedicated to your job — your morally dubious and ethically questionable job, but still a job nonetheless!
you strategically checked every entrance point of his warehouse (which, by the way, took a total of two hours of driving and twenty minutes of walking in high heels to get to!), making sure that there were no cameras or potential threats waiting outside. once you decided it was safe, you went through the back door. 
how, you ask? well, it was simple — you had a key replicated ages ago when you’d first broken into his office back at arkham asylum. in fact, you had all of his keys replicated. you know, just in case. 
stop asking why — it was for personal reasons!
after sneaking into the warehouse, you flicked on the lights and started to rummage around immediately. you came here for one thing and one thing only; fear toxin — and lots of it. you looked up at the ceiling as if some higher power up above would answer your calls. please, you thought, show me what i'm looking for.
god was your witness that night — and your prayers were answered. 
…just not in the way you thought they’d be.
as you were bent over, half hidden behind a bunch of empty crates, you were digging through piles of miscellaneous items. you were locked and loaded, so very focused on the task at hand, that you didn’t hear the front door creaking open quietly. 
jonathan heard shuffling once he entered his warehouse, the lights being turned on clearly indicated someone was here. jonathan did not panic, however — he believed that the feeling of panic and anxiety was useless to the human body. how could he make rational decisions when his mind was filled with the what if’s?
he was certain that this time, he’d caught the thief that had been stealing his toxin red handed — finally. however, as he got closer to you, he realized that you were not at all what he was imagining you to be. as he inched closer and closer, he saw two little bunny ears peeking above some empty crates.
he silently made his way around the crates, only to be met with a sight that caused his jaw to drop slightly and his cheeks to turn pink. 
you were bent over in your latex bodysuit, on your knees, rummaging through a pile of random things and the best part? you were completely oblivious to the scarecrow standing directly behind you, watching you poke your ass out as the bunny ears on your head moved every time your head did.
jonathan cleared his throat, causing you to startle. you turned around as a small gasp left your lips. once you looked up at him, you couldn’t help but notice his eyes — they were so blue. he seemed to have noticed you staring though, as he raised a brow and gave you an opportunity to explain yourself silently.
“um,” you started a little nervously, “hey?”
you mentally face palmed yourself — all you could come up with was an “um, hey?” so much for being one step ahead all the time.
“that’s quite the costume you have on," jonathan said smoothly, looking at you through the frames of his glasses. “i assume you’re the one who’s been stealing my supply?” 
you stayed silent as he loomed over you — he was tall. very tall. he was still standing above you as you sat almost obediently on the cold, concrete floor of the warehouse. empty handed at that. 
“listen, bunny,” he continued, “do you know how much trouble you’ve caused me?” 
finally, you found your voice. “i do — that’s why i did it.” 
“is that right?” jonathan said, crouching down so that he was now at your level. you felt awfully immature; but it was kind of…exhilarating. to be in the presence of someone so dangerous, just like you. “you’re not what i was expecting.”
“what do you mean?” you asked, tilting your head to emphasize your question. his eyes darted to your black bunny ears, then back to your face. he didn't answer your question, but instead, he reached his hand out towards you. 
hesitantly, you took a hold of it as he helped you up. “do you always go around stealing what doesn’t belong to you in outfits so…promiscuous?” he asked, eyeing your body up and down shamelessly. 
“...i’ve never done anything like this before,” you admitted shyly, watching his eyes trail along every part of you. “i get off on the thrill, mostly.” 
jonathan almost choked when he heard your response — if he wasn’t so attracted to you, he would’ve sprayed an extra concentrated dose of fear toxin in your face. he was standing so close to you now that you could smell his cologne — montblanc, if you remembered correctly. 
“maybe we could work out a deal,” he suggested, his voice low and almost…sultry. “i won’t kill you or turn you into the feds — if you give me what’s mine.” 
a feeling of sheer panic surged through your veins; you’d already sold all the drugs you seized from him. it’s not like you just could get any of it back, and now your life was on the line.
“i-i already sold the drugs—”
“not that,” he reprimanded, eyeing you down hungrily, “i think you know where i'm going with this.”
you stared at him blankly for a moment before you felt your cheeks heat up at his insinuation. he didn’t want the drugs, no — he wanted you. according to jonathan, you were his now. 
i mean, that wouldn’t be so bad, would it? 
jonathan was not one to fall so easily, but once he laid his eyes on you, his heart stopped. a beautiful, young, witty woman who was also a thrill seeking, danger loving felon? you were just asking to be his. it didn’t help that you came dressed like you were a triple-x star, either.
“well, what’s it going to be, bunny?” he asked softly, brushing a piece of your hair behind your ear. 
“what tough choices,” you pouted, looking up at him as you feigned distress, “i don't know what i'm going to do, jonathan.” 
he paused, his hand coming to grab your face gently. “how do you know my name?” he asked, his tone sharp. 
“i know everything about you — i've been watching you for months.” 
he was silent as his jaw clenched slightly. a tell that his calm, collected persona was about to crumble at any given moment — you had him where you wanted him. “i see,” he replied calmly, “i should have you admitted to arkham, really. something is very wrong inside of that pretty little head of yours.” 
you didn’t say anything back, but you bit your lip softly whilst looking into his impossibly blue eyes.
that, however, seemed to be the trigger that pushed jonathan over the edge, because suddenly, he had you pressed up against the cold cement walls of his warehouse. your ass was pressed up against the obvious tent in his pants as your face was met with the rough texture of the cement. 
“i’m going to test your limits,” he breathed, “a little experiment between you and i.” 
“i live for danger,” you mumbled against the wall, not letting up as he continued to threaten you. his threats were fuelling you, if anything — didn’t he hear you when you said that you got off on the thrill of things? 
“prove it, bunny,” he challenged, and you pushed away from the wall, grabbing him by the tie that hung loosely around his neck. 
holding onto it with an iron grip, you brought your lips awfully close to his as you whispered out to him. “take this off,” you instructed, “and tie me up.”
“rope bunny — i should have known.” he teased back, undoing his tie. 
roughly, he pulled your body back against his. your ass was flush against his bulge, and he bound your wrists up with his silky, red tie. “walk,” he commanded softly, guiding you into a whole separate room — a room with an old bed. 
he helped you sit on the edge of the bed before shutting the door completely, making his way back over to you. with your hands tied, you were limited in terms of mobility, but jonathan's hands were free — and he intended to make very good use of them. 
“latex,” he pointed out, reaching over to your bodysuit, “bold choice...but it looks good on you.” 
his comment caught you off guard — his tone was far too sweet for what was about to go down. his voice had you in a trance for a moment, but the feeling of him trying to maneuver your garment off of your body brought you back to reality. after a few moments of fumbling with the tight suit, he finally got you out of it. 
his lips were on yours in mere seconds, kissing you roughly as he squeezed the sides of your neck gently. he continued to kiss you, his tongue exploring your mouth as you both moaned into the steamy kiss. however, after a few minutes, he breathlessly pulled away and took a good look at the sight that was in front of him.
you were suddenly very aware of how exposed you were — it’s not like you wore a bra or any panties underneath your latex bodysuit. there’s nothing quite like the thrill of wearing nothing underneath to get your blood flowing…
he let out a heavy breath, looking slightly disheveled as he took in every inch of your perfect body. the way your tits sat up, the way your skin was slightly flushed, the way you were on display like an art piece at some french museum — you were a divinity.
not to mention those latex thigh-highs that you still had on — and the bunny ears, too. fuck, maybe he’d keep you like this. take a picture and frame it to really make a point of you being an art piece for his eyes only. 
suddenly, he harshly pushed you down and flipped you around on the bed so that your stomach was against the mattress.
he hoisted your hips upwards, putting you in a face down ass up position. the way he positioned you made how wet you were all the more obvious, your glistening cunt on display for him as he choked back a moan at just the sight of you this powerless.
you heard his pants being unzipped, along with the sound of his belt being undone, and his hard, thick cockhead was brushing up against your sticky folds. he pushed into your tight hole, making the both of you moan. his hands were suddenly reaching for your bound ones, gripping onto the tie as he started to fuck you mercilessly. 
“j-jon!” you squeaked out against the sheets as you felt his cock drilling into you at a brutal pace, sure to leave you sore for days to come. “s-slow down, f–uck!”
“you can take it, bunny,” he assured you lowly, continuing to ram into your tight little hole. “you’re going to fucking. take. it.”
you let out a strangled moan, feeling his cock brush up against that spongy spot inside of you over and over again. it was only a matter of time before you were creaming his cock, the angle giving him access to the deepest parts of you. you were certain that at one point, you swore you’d felt him inside of your stomach with how deep and how forcibly he was fucking your cunt. 
“is this what you — fuck —  wanted, bunny?” he groaned, giving your ass a harsh smack with one hand as the other was still gripping the tie around your wrists. “you just needed to have your tight little pussy stretched by my thick fucking cock?” 
“y-yes, fuck yes!” you whined, “i need to be filled, j-jonathan please—”
“i know,” he cooed with faux sympathy, “you’re such a needy little bunny. you get a cock in your tight fucking cunt and suddenly you’re not so tough anymore, are you?” 
his words went straight to your core, rather than your head, soaking you even further and making his cock slip in and out of you with pure ease. he was slamming himself into your dripping cunt, fucking you raw as you took him so deep that you were full on screaming his name over and over again.
“j-jonathan, fuuuck!” you wailed, letting him ruin you entirely.
this wasn’t exactly how you planned the night to go, but it was better than you’d imagined. better than you’d hoped. you couldn’t dwell on the thought for very long though, because suddenly he was pulling out of you right before you were about to come, much to your displeasure.
you whined, causing him to scoff a laugh. he flipped you over to that you were looking at him now, in missionary, before he sunk back into you. you let out a bratty whine along with a pout. your hands were still tied so you couldn’t touch him — and you were getting desperate. 
“please!” you exasperated as he fucked you stupid, “let me t-touch you, oh my god—”
jonathan watched as your eyes rolled into the back of your head, and finally, he decided you’d been good enough for a reward. he reached behind your back, still balls deep inside of your warm, wet hole, and quickly undid the knot around your wrists.
and as soon as your wrists were free — you were clawing at his back. 
“fuck,” jonathan groaned, feeling your hands pawing at him.
his hand suddenly reached down, playing with your clit as you mewled out incoherent babbles and pleas. he continued to press his fingers against your bundle of nerves, bringing you closer and closer to the edge once more as he plowed you. 
your cunt was dripping with your arousal, you’d never been so wet in your life. you felt the knot in your stomach tighten as you were close to coming, and jonathan moaned as he felt your cunt flutter around his thick cock. “close?” he asked breathlessly, and you just nodded — unable to speak as your orgasm washed over you in a blur.
“thaaaat’s it,” he growled, “pretty baby.” 
you whined, looking to the side as you came down from your high, but he continued to ram himself deeper and deeper into your cunt. you reached for his biceps, clinging onto them for dear life as his cock stretched your walls right open. 
“i’m about to come, fuck!” he groaned. “should i come inside? i think i will — you like the thrill, right bunny?” 
before you could protest, he was spilling his warm, thick cum into your abused little cunt. you were on birth control but you hadn’t taken your pills in days — so you were going to have to figure this out later, after the reality of what could happen would set in. he was right though; you did love a good thrill. something to get your adrenaline pumping and your blood rushing. 
you were a fear addict, and he was the supplier of fear — you were freakishly perfect for each other in all the worst ways. 
after both his and your endorphin levels gradually calmed down, he pulled out and watched the mixture of his sticky, white cum and your arousal drip out of you.
“you know, i could use someone like you to help me distribute my toxin — i'd pay you more than whatever you're making now.” he said after a minute, and your head shot up.
of course — his version of pillowtalk was bringing up business. he seemed to read your thoughts unnervingly well though, because before you could say anything, he was talking once more.
“we’d make a good team, don’t you think? since you’re my girl now and all.” he teased.
“am i?” you teased back, placing a kiss on his plush lips. “hm, i don’t see the harm — i'm game if you are.”
“that’s my girl.” he said softly, brushing his thumb against your cheek. “i’m curious though, out of all the people in gotham — what made you want to steal from me?”
“what can i say?” you whispered, “somethin’ bout you makes me wanna do things that i shouldn’t.” 
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@girlinterrupted505 @ciriceimpera @jordyn-yeager @thevelvetvampyre @galactict3a
@xanaxiii @nocturnest @psylrd @bloodandglitter207 @humbuginmybones 
@oceanstem @futurefamousdeadmusician @jonathancraneslittlepet @esotericdoe
@kpopgirlbtssvt 
@ll4n4 @ilovetoxicfictionalmen @the-buddy-things @ellebelleshelby @wiseyouthinfluencer 
@abprill @minedofmoria @strangeobsessed @5tud10-54r4h @franzine-xii 
@stsrfujid @psylrd @eyraaaaaae @nyxxie-pooh @momoewn
@fauxcongenialite @ceruleanrainblues @o0laura
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ghcstao3 · 10 months
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Retirement is supposed to be peaceful—at least, that's what Price had told Ghost. He'd said that, while the quiet is unnerving at first, you settle into it relatively easily until it's something in which you find solace. You learn to relax your shoulders if only a little bit, and you rediscover small joys you had completely forgotten about when your entire life was routine, routine, routine.
And now Ghost is starting to believe that the old bastard had been lying to him if only to talk him down from a ledge.
Because retirement is anything but peaceful. Sure, it's nice to be able to cook his own meals and have more downtime for his reading, and sure, it's nice to not have to be so hyper-vigilant in his own space for once—but God knows he knows nothing of the experience of silence when his neighbour is so goddamn loud.
Maybe it's Ghost's fault for choosing to live in a flat—he could find himself a home in the countryside without issue, he's sure of it, if only it didn't require so much effort and paperwork—but at the same time, he feels totally blameless. Because he is.
His neighbour, however, is not.
Now, Ghost has never encountered this person before. Never ended up stepping out as the same time as them, never bothered to introduce himself when he moved in. All he knows is that the person directly across the hall from him has no concept of respecting one's neighbours in terms of volume.
Be it making a racket in the wee hours when, presumably, making breakfast, or be it playing music or movies far too loud, or hell, be it talking to themselves about something Ghost needn't know the gist of, whoever it is knows no quiet. And it's getting on Ghost's last nerve.
He doesn't feel it quite warrants a formal noise complaint, but he does think it needs an intervention. If Ghost had to be forced out of the military due to injury, he's very well going to make the most out of his retirement.
Which involves silence.
Ghost waits until he knows his neighbour is home, if evidenced by the loud clashing of pots and pans in their kitchen, to go over and knock to finally, hopefully talk something out, but he too soon discovers that the plan is entirely useless.
Because as Ghost knocks and knocks, it's as if his neighbour doesn't hear him. Even in the lulls of little to no noise, there's absolutely no response. It's unbelievable.
He knows confrontation isn't everybody's thing—it's barely his own—but Christ. At least he'd answer the door.
Ghost leaves a note instead. Slips it beneath the door and retires to his own flat, hoping that his neighbour could at least bother to read.
And they must. Because Ghost realizes, over the course of the next few days, he can finally hear his own thoughts again.
A week goes by, and it's blissfully quiet. Maybe Price hadn't been such a liar after all.
Two weeks go by, and... Ghost realizes that no, Price is still a liar. The complete silence isn't peaceful at all, not when he'd grown so accustomed to noise.
Maybe Ghost had overreacted.
He's on his feet and across the hall before he has time to think about it, fist hovering over the door, unsure if he should knock. It didn't work last time, but he feels an apology should be spoken, not written, so certainly it's worth—
The lock on the other side clicks, and suddenly Ghost has no choice. The door swings open to finally reveal his mystery neighbour, and... oh.
Oh.
"Well, hello. Can I help you wi' somethin'?"
Ghost tries not to wince at the man's volume, though he doesn't think he's all that successful. Years of wearing a mask had not done well for him and keeping his expressions schooled.
But loudness aside... the lilt of his neighbour's Scottish accent is otherwise... pleasant. Rough in a way Ghost finds far too enticing, and brimming with life in a way his own deadpan never has been.
He tries not to linger on that thought.
"I'm..." Ghost wets his lips, feeling strangely nervous. "I wanted to apologize for my note. It wasn't very... it was rude. So I'm... sorry."
Since when is talking to new people nerve-wracking for him? Ghost must be going soft.
The man tilts his head. There's a slight furrow in his brow, and Ghost assumes it's because he's recalling the note to put a face to its scribbled words.
Ghost assumes wrong.
"Sorry, could you... repeat that for me?"
Ghost frowns. That was... not at all what he was expecting. So much for apologizing for his own note when his neighbour is going to be a prick anyway.
He opens his mouth to bite back a response, but not before his neighbour's eyes are widening and he's frantically gesturing in surrender.
"I don't mean to... I'm only asking because I'm deaf," the man hurriedly explains. "I don't... I've never been good at readin' lips."
And, well. If that doesn't answer every one of Ghost's questions.
His first thought is that he'd been stupid for not thinking of the possibility. His second is thank God for Roach.
Tentatively, Ghost raises his hands, a little out of practice but familiar nonetheless with sign language. Now he just feels even more like an arse.
"Want to apologize," Ghost repeats. "For the note."
A grin slowly appears on his neighbour's face at the use of sign, responding with enthusiasm despite the rocky start and the reason for Ghost's being there.
"My fault," the man says, shaking his head. "Never realize how loud I'm being."
"Still sorry." Ghost offers out one of his hands, finger-spelling with the other, "Simon."
"John," the man replies aloud, his smile warm as he shakes Ghost's hand. There's an awkward moment after their hands fall back to their sides, and for a second Ghost considers just turning and leaving, but thankfully John saves him from that.
"Well, I have to get to the shops," John says, and right, he'd just been leaving, "but I'll see you around?"
Ghost nods, and that seems to be enough for John to brush past, closing his door behind him.
That was certainly... something. At the very least, a better outcome than Ghost had been anticipating.
He should call Price. Tell the man that his idea of retirement is entirely twisted—because clearly he doesn't have a neighbour like John, who Ghost fears just might find a way to worm himself into Ghost's post-military life one way or another.
Maybe he shouldn't have left that note after all.
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yumeka-sxf · 4 months
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It's been a few months since my last merch haul post, so time for another one! As usual, acrylic stands are my main purchases, with the below set being one of the rarest I've found 💖
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The reason these are so rare is because I couldn't get them from my usual places on Amiami and Mercari JP. They're from a company called Ultrizon and are currently only sold in China. I saw them advertised on Twitter from a shop in Thailand and decided to reach out on the off chance that the shop would ship to the US. And much to my pleasant surprise, the shop, Chibishiba, replied and said that they would ship to me 😃 I was a bit concerned because they seemed to be just a small "mom and pop" shop, with only Twitter DMs as their form of communication and they kept track of everyone's orders in a google sheet. But I looked around on their social media and they seemed legit, so I placed an order (a few other fanatics I know on Discord did as well!) And thankfully, they were totally legit! They ordered the items from China, then once they shipped to Thailand, they then shipped to me in the US! Only took a few weeks 😁
Here's some more photos because they're so lovely~ For some reason the two Twiyor sets make me think of a scenario where they're going to a dance or other fancy event together (the left ones), but then something happens and they have to switch to "action mode" to stop a villain, save Anya, etc (the right ones).
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Bond looks so adorable in his suit~ Also the one of Anya on the left is her totally thinking "Papa and Mama are so cool 🤩"
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Even though I typically only buy merch with the Forgers, Yuri, Damian, and Franky were also part of this set. Lol, when I made the below photo of the three of them, I laughed because it looks like they're posing for a photo, with only Damian having fun…Yuri's like "whatever" and Franky's like "how long will this take, I have a date!" 😂
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Besides the Ultrizon acrylics, the other ones I was most looking forward to getting were these chibi ones from the cruise arc (two different sets)
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Between all of these, I now have acrylics of the Forgers' full wardrobe from the cruise arc 😅 My favorites are suit Yor, "I won't stop fighting" Yor, and Fun Dad Loid!
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I really liked these Twiyor acrylics from the recent Tsukuba collab. It's like they're going on a hiking date ❤️
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I also got these chibi "famous scene" acrylics from the Waku Waku Park event.
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I've been trying so hard to get the complete set of these big acrylics for a few months now...I managed to find Loid and Anya, but no one is selling Yor 😭 (or Bond). I won't stop looking though!
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As for non-acrylic figures, I've been looking forward to getting this Yor & Anya figure for over a year! It was actually one of the first SxF items I preordered, way back in November of 2022! Considering they had the colored prototype available way back then, I'm surprised it wasn't officially released until March of 2024. But worth the wait ❤️
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For Code White's release, I got the set of Luminasta figures (all three for a good price on eBay).
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Also chibi Loid & Yor~ I know there's a ton of chibi Loid and Yor figures out there, but I really liked these for some reason.
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Last month I went back to Kura Sushi for the last merch from their recent collab: this nice shirt~ You were able to get it if your bill was at least $70, which isn't hard to do if you bring a friend with you and you both eat a bunch of sushi! (well, he did most of the eating, lol). I'm planning to wear it for the first time at Anime Expo in July 😁
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They also had this little Anya dessert.
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And miscellaneous items I recently got were these pretty picture cards that I plan to make scans of.
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The McDonald's collab booklet, the season 2 complete set box, and the Loid & Anya cloth poster that came with the box. I also plan to make scans of these!
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A mug from the Tobu Zoo collab.
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And lastly, some new decals for my car! I found this set at Walmart of all places, lol. Found room for them among my other decals.
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Since I bought so many new acrylics and figures lately, I had to do a major reorganization of my display shelves. But I'll save those photos for another post~
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plutosbow · 3 months
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𓊆ྀི❤︎𓊇ྀི , tgm — bradley bradshaw x f!reader
`` 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭'𝐬 𝐜𝐨𝐨𝐤𝐢𝐧' , 𝐠𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐤𝐢𝐧' ? ``
summary: a sunday morning of sleeping in calls for your specialty; half-burnt pancakes. but it's always the effort that charms bradley, anyway.
warnings: none! just some silly fluff and perhaps bradley pining over you (isn't he always?)
note: this is the first little blurb i've decided to flesh out more than others, lmk if i should start posting my stuffs :3, (i don't really know how tumblr works but if anyone has some requests for miles teller characters i'd totally try to do them!)
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there was a soft light that beckoned itself into the bedroom, like a staircase to heaven as your dreary-minded eyes followed its path onto bradley's visage. right through the crack in the blind that he always complained about since it only ever reached his side of the bed — that thought made it impossible to stop a smile from tugging at your lips.
his expression twisted in his slumber, eyes wiring tightly shut in a feeble attempt to drown out the warm rays adorning his face. you always felt bad, but thanked the sun silently in the end because it allowed for domestic tidbits like this to be available to you - and only you. shifting at a snail's pace beneath the covers, you leaned forward to press a chaste kiss to his temple before rolling from the warm confines of the bed.
as much as you enjoyed your times of quiet with bradley, you enjoyed treating him to the little things in life even more. a day at home with your boyfriend called for celebration because you knew just as well as him that these moments were fleeting. downtime was barely even a word between the two of you, but that was the price paid when dating a pilot — and unfortunately, he was worth every ounce of worry that plagued you when he walked out the door with death hanging over his head.
but, he was here now. that's what mattered.
you were swift in preparing breakfast, perhaps a bit too swift as you clumsily forgot to spray the pan before pouring pancake batter into it. it spat and hissed at you, like it was wincing in agony and trying to bane you to hell before it died. you couldn't dwell on it, though, not when it still managed to make the kitchen smell like sweet dough and something nostalgic sprinkled in beneath the waft of burning batter.
a second pan was laid down, and this time it was methodical enough to have been prepped for eggs that plopped down into its gentle dip. a much kinder sizzle ensued, earning a satisfied hum from your lips as you went on tending to the curdling pancakes (could they even be called that, now?). the aroma of them crying for help was enough to rouse the grizzly bear from his surprisingly light hibernation — only let on by the groan that was pouty enough to put any sassy teenage girl to shame.
you didn't look back on account of the fact that you were trying not the burn the eggs — not on fire, which was a feat in itself — and you just assumed he would shuffle his way in and groggily mutter something about waking up 'so early', and then plop down at the counter while he waited for the meal. that was too generous of an idea, though, because his former growl from the bedroom had not been out of frustration (well, sort of), but out of a longing for you to have been in bed beside him.
thick, calloused fingers snaked their way around your waist and curled into the tender flesh of your hips, earning a soft hum from your throat. it was a sound that bradley had grown fond of, whether you be pining for his attention or whining at his incessant teasing — he could always count on that sweet, purring hum to fall from those pretty lips.
"my lady, my lady," he rasped, voice dry and scratchy as he recited his little morning mantra. his head dipped down, nose pushing your hair out of the way as his face pressed into your nape. you can't stifle the soft giggle that bubbles up in your throat at the tickle of his mustache and slightly stubbled chin. "i was expectin' .. room service .. on this fine mornin'?"
you scoff with a roll of your eyes, flipping the eggs and using this motion to elbow him in the gut. he tenses and grunts, hands gripping the gentle dip of your hips like they were a safety blanket to him.
"room service costs extra, mister bradshaw," you tut, grabbing the pancake-contaminated spatula to begin painstakingly scraping them off of the poor pan. "and i'll have you know, i am not a cheap commodity." your words earn a low chuckle from his crackling throat, lips migrating from your nape to your ear, his mouth finding your earlobe to give it a small nibble - just innocent enough for a morning like this.
"a high-end gem such as yourself must be making somethin' extravagant, no?" bradley chuffs softly, peeking down at the pans as his chin rested into the dip of your shoulder. he winces idly at the scraping sounds that ensue from your assault on the .. pancakes?.. his brows crease, and he bites his tongue for a moment.
you .. never were the finest cook in the world.
bradley found that worth more than any perfect dish.
"hm," he clicks his tongue before you even had a chance to respond, "flapjacks with a side of black tar 'n soppen eggs; gourmet." the pilot cooed, making you laugh and frown simultaneously at his unfiltered jab at your skills. you always knew the effort payed off more in his eyes than the actual taste of the food (thank goodness). you flip the ashy, flaking pancakes onto a plate and try tending to the barely edible eggs, but it seems all too lost as you resort to just turning the burner off.
even though you knew he never minded your ineptitude in the kitchen, it was moreso a personal duel when it came to your absentminded degradation over your failures.
"good-lookin'," came that husky voice, tinged with slight guilt after realizing you hadn't responded to his silly jab after some time now. a hand trails up your abdomen to let the pad of his thumb run along the edge of your jaw. you can't see his face, but one can assume his brows are quirked in silent question with a hint of a plea in hopes you'll forgive him (silly. over something that never even hurt you to begin with). it earns a soft giggle from somewhere in your chest.
"i bought extra syrup last errand run to make sure you can drown out the taste of mustard gas, my love." you hum, swaying a bit as you shift away from the counter and squirm around to finally face your big ol' grizzly bear. at your words, that exact expression you expected to see from before quickly lightened. a crooked grin curled up on his stupidly kissable lips and his head tilted almost expectantly.
"maybe i like my breakfast with a lil' bit of radioactivity." bradley retorts before burying his face into your neck, letting his stache poke at your flesh and make you squeal and wiggle around. now satisfied at your ticklish state, he grumbles something inaudible and presses open-mouthed kisses against your exposed collarbone. his tongue is too dry to really give you the full effect, so he compensates and gives your ass a good and satisfying squeeze.
you squeak at that, letting one hand curl into his tousled up locks while the other drifts down his bare back. he keens at the sensation of you tugging his hair, broad arms consuming you further like a moth to a flame — your body a burning star in his foggy vision. he keeps kissing, not lingering long enough to suck against the skin but it fills you with contentment anyway, because the softness of the embrace is far more fulfilling than sex could ever be in that moment.
he was more desperate than a starved dog, it showed in the way his grasping motions along your body were so fervent yet .. straining to be tame. your thumb rubbed against his scalp and you sway absently along the kitchen tiles with him, breakfast merely an afterthought as your bodies consume one another in their loving warmth.
"missin' ya so much. all the time, sweetheart." bradley murmurs, hoarse voice tugged by the vulnerability rearing its ugly head in his heart. you crane your neck and hum softly, lips pressing into his temple to leave a warm, wet kiss in their wake. it was an action that always hushed his aching mind when it was on the cusp of spiraling, something only you could ever do for him — a jockey who soothes their racehorse that froths at the mouth before each race.
"i'll always be here, honey. always gonna make you shitty breakfast, always gonna tolerate that loud mouth a' yours." you mumble against his prickly, stubbled face. the soft, whiney sigh that slips from his lips reassures you that your words, in fact, soothed the raging stallion in your grasp.
his mouth latches onto your collarbone once more, this time lingering for a beat too long and making a suctioned pop as he pulled back. cloudy hazel eyes peer down at you while his dry tongue flicks out for a second of thought.
"go lay down, sugar," bradley mutters - his voice stirring from deep within his rasped throat. it managed to make a familiar warmth bubble up in your stomach. ".. 'm gonna pour myself a cup of orange juice and give you some good goddamn art on this blank canvas 'a mine."
that thought alone makes you chew the corner of your lip to suppress a stupid, cheeky smirk, and you scurry off before he gets a chance to question you and your unbridled excitement for the mere opportunity to be adorned in his artwork (he never called those methodical hickeys of his anything different).
you can't help the fuzzy sensation that begins to pour down from your heart and sift into each crevice of your innards. you can't even recall the last time the two of you started off a morning so soft and tender, and it makes you pause in the hallway to glance at bradley while he looks through the fridge. a quick double take, just to make sure.
he was here.
and oh, he was so pretty, goddamnit.
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PART 2 HERE !!
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salaimoi · 5 months
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will you hold my purse?
how the jjk men would react when you ask them to hold your purse. ib this tt starring: gojo satoru, toji fushiguro, & ryomen sukuna guest appearance from choso kamo
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Gojo Satoru
This diva would hold it as if it were his purse to begin with – no shame whatsoever, utterly unbothered by anyone else’s fragile masculinity. He would proudly wear it under his arm – to the point that your purse gets confused as to who its original owner is. He’ll get sooo into character that if someone got too close for comfort to him while you’re gone, he’d shriek like a little girl and whack them over the head with said purse. Total princess behavior.
Even if the person was only passing by, he assumes the worst of them: they’re trying to steal your handbag. 
And to your shocking dismay, when you return from the restroom you’re met by an innocent man laid out on the floor – all while the culprit continues to slander him with false accusations. You had to drag him out by the ear so he’d put a stop to his tomfoolery, but even then he continued to act a fool.
Safe to say you got kicked out of the restaurant and you’re both no longer welcomed. Your purse still under his arm, he clutches it tightly and ‘humpfs’ – head held high and nose tilting towards the roof to put emphasis on his sassiness.
“Your breadsticks were stale anyway!” he yells out to the closed door behind the two of you as he tosses an imaginary strand of hair over his shoulder. The tiny bag had given him an infinite amount of cheekiness – as if he didn’t have enough of that already.
Too bad if you really liked that purse, because it didn’t belong to you anymore.
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Toji Fushiguro
He’ll look at you weird, baffled as to why you trust him with your purse in the first place. How naive of you, really. The thought of rummaging through it and stealing your valuables goes through his mind, but decides against it – you were both equally broke anyways. He’s not afraid of your purse, but he won’t wear it on display – so he throws it over his shoulder nonchalantly, one hand on his hip as he whistles while he waits for you to be done with your business. 
Eventually the wait gets far too boring for his liking, so he begins to dig through your purse, not to take anything from you – even though he was tempted to do so – but to entertain himself. And just as he expected, he found so much useless crap. Gosh, you were such a disorganized person. Not to mention you had like a year's worth of tampons in your bag. what the hell woman? 
Taking advantage of the business opportunity, he stands outside the ladies bathroom and begins to “offer” tampons to the passing ladies. Not for free, of course; his benevolence came at a price: $5 a tampon. 
When you overhear women giggling and fawning over a handsome man being a “girl’s girl” outside, you immediately knew. You were inclined to smack him silly, but his logic behind the whole ordeal was so stupid that you were afraid he’d get dumber than he already is. 
“What the hell are you mad at? I just bought us lunch, woman.” 
“Yeah, with MY tampons. That’s literally blood money, you insolent shit.” you reprimand him, furiously snatching your purse back from him.
And you continued to scold him over some nice hotdogs. His treat, according to him. 
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Ryomen Sukuna
“Hell no.” He doesn’t hesitate to turn down your absurd request, crossing his arms over his chest in refusal. The fact that you were incapable of multitasking baffled him, so much so that he began to deem you incompetent from that moment on. But you were literally pissing your pants so you just shove it against his chest and sprint to the nearest restroom. 
To no one’s surprise, he allows the purse to fall to the ground, completely unbothered by the thing. And yet, he would glance down at it to make sure it was still there while you were gone – but not daring to touch it.
Once you had returned, though, he began to kick the thing around so that you wouldn’t be able to pick it up. He barked in laughter every time you thought you would finally get it off the ground – only for him to kick it around some more.
“Serves you right for trying to boss me around,” he roars.
All you wanted was for him to hold it for a few minutes, and now he had you playing ball with your own purse. It was quite amusing to him regardless.
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Choso Kamo
Being the teeth-rotting sweet man he is, he’ll nod an infinite number of times – his face lighting up that you actually entrusted him with such an important task. Eyes gleaming with nothing but excitement, he’ll relentlessly clutch it over his chest with both hands, looking from side to side every other second to make sure no one tries anything with your purse. To anyone passing by, he’d look like a sweet grandpa taking care of his beloved’s tote while she freshens up.
A group of girls happen to stumble upon the sight, taking notice of the man holding the bag as if his life depended on it. Because of how defenseless he seemed, they almost thought he was lost – so they approached him and asked him that.
“I’m holding my girlfriend’s purse while she runs to the restroom,” he replies shyly, completely unsure how to handle these types of situations – he’d never been left alone without you before.
The girls find his actions so adorable that they compliment you for having a boyfriend like him by your side. But that was before they had walked away and you had noticed Choso’s red-stained cheeks from how much they had been pinched prior to your arrival.
“Please don’t leave me alone ever again.” He pleads, not wanting to relive something like that during the spawn of his life. 
You’d be better off taking him into the restroom with you next time. 
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see-arcane · 3 months
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With a total of 1,176 votes tallied, the preferred plushie poll winner with 28.8% of votes is…
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What a close one! Jonathan came in with 27.7%, the mysterious Mr. Morse with 24.9% and, delicious irony of ironies, London Dracula with 18.9%. Rest in pieces. Now, what does all this mean going forward?
First, just to reconfirm: I will absolutely be looking into the costs for having more than one plushie character produced at a time. For all that Mina has the top spot if it comes down to a solo run, Nobody Wants to Separate the Gothic Horror Soulmates, even as wee little plushies. It hurts my heart to think of. Mina and Jonathan deserve to sit side by side on everyone’s pillow. Just as Quinn Morse deserves to haunt the pillow next to theirs while casually throttling and carving London Dracula into pieces. For enrichment.
But beyond that, some other key things:
How is this getting done?
Sadly, I was not a cool enough kid for Makeship to greenlight a collaboration with me. Tragique. But while I was sitting around waiting for them to get back to me, I had time to browse around for other options. During that sniffing around I dug up a couple of promising manufacturers—one of which has some really neat options for not only plush toys, but all sorts of bric-a-brac like stationery, shirts, bags, cups, et cetera—and I plan to reach out to them for quotes to start with. Nothing really gets to move forward until I can nail down prices and the amount of X plushies to be made.
I am more than a little hesitant to tell anyone MAKE ME 1000+ PLUSHIES, PLEASE, THE TUMBLR POLL SAID THEY’RE GOOD FOR IT. These aren’t as simple as print/make-on-demand products, so I need to be careful estimating the amount of folks ready and willing to drop money on the little guys. But I will keep everyone updated on the numbers regardless!
Sooo is this a crowdfunding thing or an investment or what?
Don’t know yet. I am still between jobs at the moment—reminder to check out my Ko-Fi if you want to drop me a buck or commission some art!—but if this is something I can safely drop some of my own money in with the guarantee that it will let me do better than break even, I’ll do what I can out of pocket. However, if the cost of making something of good quality turns out too steep, I’ll start looking into stuff like Kickstarter and Backerkit and so on. I want to be sure I’m not gutting anybody’s wallet to pull this off and I want to be double-sure that what we’re paying for isn’t some flimsy throwaway junk. We are all here on the same Dracula book club starving artist site, so It Has to Be Worth It and not a money-sink for anyone.
Got it. Any other info to spare?
For the plushies specifically, this is when I’ll start:
Polishing up the current four designs into cleaner illustrations with different angles to provide for mockup samples with whoever I pick to manufacture with. If I get stuck on something—(which is likely)—I may throw up another poll to bug everyone about palettes and fashion choices. I have a few more designs I haven’t dropped yet for Epilogue Harkers, a non-Bloofer Lucy, and keychains that I’d love to share too!
Eyeballing materials. I’m already picturing a very close-cut cloth for the build and clothes, but I need to decide on filling too. Stiff overstuffing to hold a pose versus softer/lighter plush for floppy cuddleability. 
Poking at other character roughs, ala the Suitor Squad, the Weird Sisters, Van Helsing, Renfield, and Baby Quincey. And if all of those go well…
…maybe some designs for other favorites in the public domain playground. (Looks meaningfully at Clarimonde, Carmilla, Victor Frankenstein and the Creature, the King in Yellow, too many others.) ((But that’s all far-future stuff at the moment.))
Cool! But you also mentioned something about other merch?
I did.
Because goddamn do I want some Dracula-themed stationery. Journals! Memo pads! Pens! Every day we don’t have these things with the Harkers’ mark upon them is a victory for the forces of Count Dracula’s document-destroying evil. Likewise for shirts, totes, mugs, keychains, face masks and other things that could use some novel-flavored goodies. Hell, I’ll probably even get on with making stuff for The Vampyres to link on my website too. Because I am. Maybe behind on that. By several months.
Anyway.
I’ve got to start working on some designs for those too while the plushie process is progressing. Pray that my carpals don’t get tunneled.
Nice! Sounds like your plate is pretty full. So that’s it, right?
:)
Arcane?
:3c
Arcane. I need you to tell me this is all you’re working on.
>:}
Arcane.
Please stand by.
I have a little treat brewing for the Dracula Dailiers and @re-dracula folks in honor of a very special day for our good friend Jonathan Harker.
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manicpixiedreamcurl · 8 months
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The More You Give ❧ (Part VIII)
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Pairing | Eddie x shy!reader Warnings | 18+ only. Do not interact if you are underage. Roleplay (PrincessxWannabe Usurper lmao), sexual fantasies (including rockstarxgroupie), Eddie says some weird possessive stuff but reader likes it, oral (M receiving), P in V sex, dom!Eddie, sexual guilt as per, there’s aftercare. Word Count | 10,400 A/N | Nobody ask me about the timeline of this story, either in the fic or how long it takes me to write it. Taglist Previous Chapter
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The air is stuffy, despite the growing chill outside. The last days of Summer are at least a week gone now, and with Autumn comes heated stores. An ABBA song is playing on the main floor, filtering through enough for you to make out the tune. It’s the sort of thing your Mom plays in the car all the time, your mind following the words even though you can’t quite hear them over the buzzing ceiling lights. 
I try to capture every minute, the feeling in it. Slipping through my fingers- 
The curtains pull back, the sound of metal over metal dragging you to full attention. May’s eyes are bright with excitement as she twirls, showing off how the strapless black dress fits around her waist and flares out at her hips. 
“It’s perfect, right?” She says, smoothing it down only to twirl and puff the skirt up again. “Ooh, let me see with the jacket.” 
You search through the bag at your feet for the cropped jacket she’d found earlier, then watch as she pulls it over her shoulders. She fluffs her hair and poses in the mirror at the end of the changing room hallway. “I mean it actually is perfect, right?”
“For sure, you can totally see who you are already.” 
“Right? And then I can just backcomb my hair a little. My Mom’s gonna lend me her scarf. God knows what earrings I’ll wear, but I can work it out. Definitely can’t get anything new after this,” she finishes, turning her head and pulling at the tag on her back to double check the price. She pulls a face before tucking it away gingerly.
“That bad?” 
“That bad. Even with 30% off.” May smooths her hands over the skirt again, turning once more to the mirror. Her smile lights up her pretty face. “But totally worth it.” 
Once the dress is folded and wrapped in tissue paper by the woman at the counter, paid for with what seems like every spare penny in May’s purse, attention moves to your costume. “Okay, Fairy God Mother,” May says, linking her arm with yours. “Game plan. Where do we need to go?”
“I think just the costume store. I have a blue dress I can use. But I’d like some wings and a wand. Maybe a tiara, if I can afford it.”
“Ugh, you’re gonna look so cute. Are you sure you don’t want to come to Tommy’s party?”
“The whole reason I’m dressing up is for Grace,” you reason, spotting the orange banner reading City of Fright, which appears in the same spot every year mid-September and vanishes November first. 
Gone are ABBA’s lilting tones, replaced with stock Halloween music, the occasional creepy laugh and thunder clap. The entire front of the store is complete costumes, wrapped up in plastic and hanging on metal rods, but once you reach the shelves at the back, you are surrounded by an array of vampire teeth, witches hats and face paints. 
“Eddie’s renting Theatre of Blood,” you tell her, not waiting for a reaction before launching into a prepared defence. “It sounds really good. It’s about an actor who takes revenge on his critics by murdering them like Shakespearian deaths - drowning in Malmsey wine, that kind of thing. He picked it cause, you know, he thought I’d like it.” 
“Okay, but she’ll be in bed by what? Eight?” May asks, wandering around the table of paraphernalia as you start thumbing through fairy wings piled next to fake blood bags, searching for the right blue. “You could come after.”
There’s a moment of silence, then she sighs softly. “Okay, I will say it’s kind of cute that he picked that. In a weird, not really that cute cause it’s a horror movie about gruesome murders, sort of way.” 
You stifle a grin, chancing a look at her over the table. “That sounded…almost like a compliment?”
“Almost,” she agrees, walking back round to your side. Then, before you can answer, she has seized a shiny silver plastic tiara and is reaching out to place it gently on your hair. “There. Fit for a Princess.”
You shake your head, laughing. “What about a Fairy Godmother?”
May hums, grabbing a set of the net and wire wings and pulling them over her arms. “I’m the fairy now!” She declares, raising her chin and going up on tiptoes to whirl around the racks, wings shaking behind her. “Here to make all your Halloween costume dreams come true!” 
Your heart warms, a giggle escaping as she peers curiously at the rubber masks and cat ears in character, mumbling about the strange habits of humans. 
“Oh please, fairy godmother! I need a wand if I’m going to look anything like the real thing!” 
“A wand, of course!” She cries dramatically. “No true fairy would be seen dead without their wand.” You watch her scurry on tip toe around until she comes to a display of wands of various colours, topped by stars and hearts, sequined tassels and glittery handles. She wiggles her fingers above them, picks out one with a simple silver star and travels back to you gracefully. You take it from her with a flourish. “There, and now your wings.” She helps you into your own pair, then turns and throws a graceful hand into the air. “Now, we fly!” 
You flit about after her, laughing at her with every pause she takes to frown disapprovingly at fake scars and rubber spiders. She stops in front of a Tinkerbell costume, pointing with a surprised smile at the model on the package. “Hey, I know her!”
You snort a laugh and it sets her off, all attempts to stifle your laughter only making it worse. Your giggles are only beginning to settle when you feel the sudden awareness of being watched tickle the back of your neck. 
“Uh, hi girls.” 
Your heart drops. Caroline stands, a hand over her mouth, barely covering the smirk. “You look like you’re having…fun.”
Suddenly, the clear elastic of the wings is too tight around your shoulders. You can feel the crooked angle of the tiara atop your head, close to slipping off entirely. The wand in your hand isn’t silver now, just chipped paint on plastic. 
Next to you, May is wrenching off her wings, laughing airily. “Just messing around,” she assures, folding them up and holding them with a tight fist at her hip. “You costume shopping?”
Caroline looks around at where you are. “I mean, obviously. Not for me, though, for Ethan,” she sighs. “You know boys, no interest in shopping.” She sets her stare on you, eyes scanning from the crooked tiara downwards. “Are you girls dressing up together?”
Your throat feels blocked, leaving you just to shake your head. May answers for you both. “No, no. Like I said, we’re just messing around. So we should probably put this stuff back.” She slides her wings into the space between some hanging masks before elbowing you into action. You’ve abandoned the tiara and wand and are in the process of sliding off the wings when she adds, coolly, “I’m actually going as Madonna.”
Caroline’s smirk falls, replaced at terrifying speed with a deep frown. “What? You can’t, I’m doing Madonna. I’ve got a veil and everything. Ethan’s going to be Sean Penn.”
“Oh, don’t worry. I’m going as her in Desperately Seeking Susan, so it’ll be, like, totally different.”
“But I don’t think there should be two Madonna’s,” Caroline continues, almost sounding sympathetic. She crosses her arms, shrugging. “You’ll just have to go as somebody else.”
“Oh,” May says, shoulders falling. “Um, right. I get what you mean.”
You’re not in the habit of arguing with Caroline. It’s been easier, historically, not to contradict her or answer back. But you can feel May deflating beside you, and it tumbles out. “But you won’t look similar or anything, they’re completely different costumes.”
“They’re not though.” She answers with finality. “They’re both Madonna, and the last thing we want is comparisons, right? People talking about who wears it better all night?”
May nods. “You’re right. Totally. I’ll think of something else. No worries.”
“But May, your dress! You can’t return it now, it was on sale!” 
“It’s fine,” May snaps before smiling close mouthed at Caroline. “I can find something else to wear, no issue.”
“You could be fairies together!” Caroline says. “I bet the guys at Tommy’s party would love that.”
“No, no, like I said, we were just messing around,” May says. “Not really my thing. And anyway, she’s not coming on Friday.”
“Oh no!” Caroline pushes her bottom lip out into a pout. “But I haven’t seen you outside of school in ages!”
“I’m babysitting,” you explain, clutching your removed wings in your fists. 
“Oh sure you are, not spending the night with your boyfriend. We hardly see you anymore, I feel like there must be so much detail we’ve all been missing out on. You’ll have to come on the next girls trip, right May? So we can hear all about you and…Eddie.”
Your heart pounds as May nods. “Yeah,” she answers. “Eddie can’t have all your time.”
“Perfect. Well, let me know what you end up doing, May! See you later, girls!”
She flounces away, and May hides her face in her hands. “I can’t believe she saw me doing that.” 
“It’s okay-”
“It’s not!” She says, throwing her hands up. Her eyes shine with frustrated tears. “It’s not okay! Not for me, anyway. It’s different for you, people already think you’re weird.” 
You blink at your friend. Then you look down at the speckled linoleum floor, watch the spots fuzz and blend into each other as the lump in your throat builds. Before five seconds have passed, her arms appear at your sides, pulling you into a tight hug. “I’m sorry,” she whispers. “I didn’t mean that.”
But you know that she did. You know that’s exactly what she thinks. 
For the moment you have to think about what you say now, you imagine calling her out on this. Pushing her away and telling her that she doesn’t have to spend any more time with you, given you embarrass her so much. You’d buy your fairy wings and your crown, walk out with your head held high. 
Maybe she’d call after you, apologise again, say that losing you isn’t worth impressing Caroline or sitting at the cheerleader table.
But maybe any pain she’d feel at the prospect of your friendship ending would only bring out her anger. Maybe she’d swear to never speak to you again. 
If you were somebody else, someone who didn’t love May, maybe you’d take that risk. But you are you, and you’ve loved May since you were five. To you, the only thing worse than feeling hurt yourself is the thought of hurting her back.
So you shake your head at her shoulder, blink away tears and squeeze her tight in your arms. “It’s okay,” you whisper. 
“Really?” 
“Yeah,” you nod, pulling away from her collar that smells the way being seven smelled. You release her, and in turn her arms fall from you. “I get it, you’re just stressed.”
“I know! I don’t know what I’m going to do about my costume!” 
Your heart pangs. You swallow the lump in your throat that’s trying to rise back up. “Well, at least the dress is black,” you say, sniffing quick and quiet. You drag your hands over your eyes, clearing away the wetness clinging to your bottom lashes. Stop it, you think. Stop crying. “Let’s return the jacket, yeah? Then you’ll have money for a witch hat or something.” 
May nods slowly as she thinks it through. “Okay, yeah. Yeah, that works.” She gives you a relieved smile. “God, what would I do without you? Let’s go.”
❦⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄❦⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄❦⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄❦⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄❦  
“Well, I didn’t think I wanted glasses because Katie has glasses,” Grace explains, holding her plastic pumpkin, now close to overflowing with candy, in both hands at her stomach. She looks at you with a look too knowing for a seven year old, then continues. “Katie is a tattle tale.”
“I see,” you nod. 
“But I want ones like Jessica’s!” She cries, arms extending with the weight of her treasure trove before she pulls it back up. “They go dark in the sun!”
“It’s not the same,” she whines. “And then when we went to the optom- uhm.”
“But you already have sunglasses,” you reason, picturing the little red plastic pair you’ve had to run back for when out on walks many times. Grace hefts the pumpkin again and you give in, lifting the bag from her grasp and burying your wand in with the candy. You soften when she grabs your hand with a deep sigh.
“The optometrist?”
“Yeah, when we went to see him, he said my eyes were perfect!”
“Well, that’s good.”
“No!” She yells, dramatically, pulling on your arm with her whole weight until you have to  heave yourself back up. You stifle a giggle at her distraught expression. “Because now I’ll never get glasses, and everybody has them.”
“Well, first of all, I’m sure not everybody has them,” you say, smiling down at her grumpy face. “And secondly, you shouldn’t just want something like glasses because other people have them, even if it was everybody else. You can’t just live your life just trying to be like everyone around you.”
“I know,” she mumbles. Then, catching your raised eyebrow, “I know!”
You round the corner to her street, and by the time you’re approaching her house, she’s moved comfortably on to the next topic of her candy eating schedule for the next three days. “Because Jessica saves all her Skittles for last,” Grace explains, her position now firmly against being anything like Jessica. “Which is stupid, because you should have the best candy first.”
“Mm? Why’s that?”
Grace looks at you with a frown. “Because the best comes first,” she tells you, with the tone of somebody kindly trying to hold in their frustration with an imbecile. 
“Of course, silly of me to ask. Hi, Mrs. Miller!”
Grace’s Mom was clearly waiting for you near the front door, already out and standing on the front steps as you walk up the front path. Grace holds her hands out to take her bucket back, launching forward when she’s got ahold of it. “Mom! Look at all my candy!”
“Whoa! There’s no way you’ll be able to eat all that!” Her Mom says, eyes comically wide. “Think you need someone to help you out, hm?”
Grace shrieks indignantly, running under her Mom’s arm inside and clambering up the stairs out of sight without a bye nor leave for you. 
“Everything went okay?” Her Mom asks, smiling when you give her your usual answer, all fine. “Will you be okay getting home? I can get her back down if you need a ride.”
“Oh, um,” you check either side of the street, feeling suddenly warmed inside at the sight of Eddie’s van parked at the end of the road. Now that you’re concentrating on it, you’re sure you can hear the music blasting behind glass. “No, it’s okay. That’s my boyfriend.”
“Ah, Eddie.” She smiles, then smacks her teeth as she, too, registers his music. “Maybe tell him to keep it down next time? I don’t mind but I already get monthly phone calls from Mrs O’Hara about the sound of the lawnmower.” 
“Oh, sorry. I’ll do that,” 
“Okay,” she says, calling after you as you start up a fast pace towards Eddie. “You have a good night!”
You pull your cardigan sleeves down over your hands to fight the chill as you move, smiling when you can properly make out Eddie sitting in the front seat. He had a special D&D night planned when he dropped you off at Grace’s earlier. While your costume sat folded in your bag all day, he’d gone to school dressed all in black, even his white Reeboks swapped out for a pair of knockoff doc martens he’d launched himself towards when he caught sight of them at the thrift store. They’d fit him just fine with three pairs of socks.
This morning, sitting in his van, he’d barely managed to control his excited twitches while you lined his eyes with a cheap black pencil from the drugstore. Your work is a little smudged now, but on him, it looks even better than before. Which makes sense, you think. Eddie doesn’t suit neat lines. 
“Hi Princess!” He calls, turning the music down enough that his excitement is just audible through the glass as you approach. 
“Not a Princess,” you remind him as you climb in, turning your back to shake your shoulders and display the blue net wings. “A Fairy God Mother.” You settle back into the seat, shivering away the chill that had gooseflesh rising over your body. Eddie rubs your arm over your cardigan, and you take the opportunity to grab his hand. As much as you want to warm your cold fingers, it’s mainly just to touch him. “How was the game?”
His grin turns sharp as he leans back in his chair, chin tilted up. “So fucking good. I have them right where I want them. I thought for a second Lucas had me worked out. He hesitated when they were getting to the caves, but then he just went along with it. I can’t wait till next week.” He lets go of your hand long enough to start up the van before returning his open palm to the space between you for you to take hold of him again. “How is Princess Grace?”
“Increasingly despotic. She executed like five of her toys before we went out trick or treating.” 
“Jesus,” Eddie laughs. “What for?” 
“Well, her not-so-wise Fairy God Mother,” you start, gesturing to yourself. “Made the mistake of telling her about royal food tasters? Now there’s a poisoning attempt every few days.” 
“Very active imagination, this girl. Violent, but active.”
“Mm, I think most girls play that way. When I was little- Well, me and May, we’d act like witches sometimes? And make potions out of mud and sticks and stuff. And talk about who we would curse.”
“Yeah?” Eddie asks. “And which poor soul had earned this spite, pray tell?” 
“Did you ever have Mr Gilmour?”
“Oh, Gilmour, yeah, I fuckin' hated that guy!” Eddie yells. His eyebrows furrow. “I threw up during gym in seventh grade and the sadistic prick made me finish running a mile.” 
“Yeah, I forgot about that till now.” His brows stay taught for a second longer, then he shakes his head a little, tapping his fingers along your knuckles. “Too bad I didn’t have you around then, coulda cursed him for me a little earlier.”
“Oh, Eddie, that’s horrible.”
“I would have,” you promise. “But you were telling me about the game. Did you get Dustin with the, um, venom troll?”
“Not yet. We didn’t get as far as I’d have wanted before they had to go. I mean, what fourteen year old has a curfew? I didn’t, and I turned out alright. But I’ll get him next week. I can’t wait to see his face - that little punk thinks he’s so smart, but he is pre-dictable.”
Eddie continues describing the campaign, the traps he’s set for them that he’s sure they’ll run into, the whole drive to his place, excited and animated as he usually is on the rare occasion you get to see him after Hellfire, wound up from the events of the day. He only slows down when you’re settled on his couch. Sneakers left at the door, wings, tiara, and wand abandoned on the kitchen table, wrapped up in his arms as the opening titles of Theatre of Blood play. 
Eddie’s so warm, and unusually still when you sit with him like this. Being cuddled up to him puts you in mind of your aunt’s black cat. She spends the first couple hours of every visit pretending that she isn’t interested in being anywhere near you. Then, after letting her sniff your hand, rubbing gently between her ears, she darts up on your lap, her soft heat spreading through you. 
Eddie might not admit it, at least not verbally, but he likes being petted the same way. You’ve seen his eyes flutter when you play with his hair, heard the gentle sighs he lets out when you touch his cheek. Now, leaning into his chest, rubbing lazily at his torso, you can feel the way his body relaxes into the couch under your touch. It makes you smile at the TV even as Vincent Price swears revenge on all his critics.
You turn your head just a little, trying to be subtle as much as possible so you can look at him properly. Eddie’s eyes, which in sunlight can be bright as copper, are dark and focused in the electric light of the TV. The light freckles that dotted the tops of his cheeks and nose during Summer have faded from the cloudy days and early sunsets, leaving only his soft pale skin. His lips, as always, are soft looking and pink, still shiny from the last time his tongue peeked out, set in a near constant subtle pout. 
You sigh gently, and in turn breathe in the remnants of smoke and laundry detergent from his shirt, the fading spice of his drugstore aftershave.
“You know I picked this movie out special,” he says, only his eyes moving to fix you with a mockingly suspicious expression. “Vincent’s a master.”
You’re surprised to find you’re not ashamed at having been caught. “M’just looking at you.”
“Therein lies the problem, sweet thing. One minute you’re just looking. Next thing I know my head’s trapped between your thighs.” This time he leans in properly. “Wicked temptress.” He whispers it, his breath warming your face. 
You think he’ll kiss you then, but instead he relaxes back into the couch with a sigh. “M’just lucky you weren’t dressed up all day.” His hand tugs at the hem of your skirt, then spreads out just above your knee. “I wouldn’t have been able to think about anything else. It’s a miracle I even got the movie playing instead of trying to touch you.”
“I wouldn’t have minded,” you answer, trying not to sound too eager. 
“I bet,” he says, eyes shining. Then his face turns serious, palm coming to his heart. “But Eddie the Chivalrous would never touch a Princess without properly wooing her first.” His eyes scan over your face quickly. “I guess that means we need to finish the movie.”
He’s teasing you. He wants to push, see how much he can get you to say, if you’ll ask him outright to just touch you the way you want. Warring feelings compete to decide what you do next. Maybe months ago, when you first started dating Eddie, you would have pressed your thighs together and settled in to finish the film. A part of you still calls for that, screams that whatever you say won’t be right. 
You stare at Eddie now. His eyes still lined dark, the smirk he’s trying to hide. Your toes curl just looking at him, and the thought escapes naturally. “You don’t look like Eddie the Chivalrous, right now.” 
Eddie blinks slowly. His head tilts. “No? Who do I look like, then?” 
Now, something like shame creeps back in, and you wish you’d just settled down to watch the movie.
You haven’t ever put a name to it before. In your fantasies, the ones that appear unprompted when you’re alone in your bed and you haven’t been able to touch him in a couple days, Eddie’s always Eddie, but sometimes just a little different. 
Maybe Eddie the Chivalrous is the right name for how you first thought about him like that, calling you Princess as usual but meaning it. You thought about him as your knight and guard, sworn to protect you, breaking all the rules by laying you down and treating you gently, better than any lord or Prince you could be promised to.
Then you’d think about his laugh, the one that comes out when you moan a little loud, or lose your patience and try to direct his hands or his tongue to where you need him. The mocking gasp and teasing tone that often comes along with it, you want it bad, huh, Princess? You think about an Eddie who’s like that all the time, teasingly mean with you, dark and dangerous to everyone else, finding you alone in your soft bed, holding your hands above your head and- and-
People already think you’re weird.
You give in to the sudden hot shame, pressing your face to Eddie’s chest lest he read your expression so perfectly that he works it all out. You whisper into his shirt, more to yourself than him. “I’m so weird.” 
“Well, s’a good thing you’re with me then, mm?” He says, big hand moving to stroke the back of your neck. “Cause if you got a fantasy, like, something you think about when I’m not around. You know I won’t judge you for it, right?” 
“I know.” It comes out muffled against his shirt but it’s certain. It’s instinctual, now. You’re as sure that you don’t need to worry about Eddie judging you as you are that the sun will rise tomorrow morning. More and more, you find yourself talking to him the way you talk to yourself in your head. Easy and free, not waiting for the other shoe to drop. But this is different. “It’s just- It’s like-” You sigh, searching for the words that won’t come. 
He hums, still rubbing your neck. “Maybe I could- I mean, do you…wanna hear one ‘a mine?” You emerge from your hiding place, leaning back into his hand to gauge how serious he is. Eddie’s eyes crinkle at the sides at having coaxed you into looking at him again. “Yeah?”  
“Okay.” 
“Okay,” he echoes. Eddie searches his side for the remote first, pausing Vincent in the middle of another monologue. “Okay. Well, yeah, sometimes I think about- Wait no, gotta set the scene. I’ve just played maybe the best show of my life. Nothing too big,” he continues, giving you a serious look. “I’m not a sell out. We’re talking the smaller arenas, you know? Anyway, after, when I get backstage, feeling like hot shit, there’s this girl. Prettiest I’ve ever seen. And she’s wearing the band’s shirt.”
“And she’s a little shy. Can barely look me in the eye-” He catches you just as your gaze moves to his collar, pulling you back to staring, helpless, into his dark eyes. Eddie takes your hand from where it was playing with the hem of his shirt, weaving your fingers together. “She’s kinda fidgety, too.”
You swallow. “Me?”
“You, sweet thing. S’always you.” You bite the gum behind your bottom lip, holding back from grinning too much. You squirm a little under his gaze, waiting for him to speak again. “And you tell me you’ve been waiting for me,” Eddie says, voice smooth and quiet. “You tell me you’re my biggest fan. And you can’t quite say everything you wanna say, but it doesn’t matter, cause I’ve got you worked out. So I get real close,” he says, his face disappearing as his mouth moves towards your ear, “and I ask if you want me to touch you?”
“And I do,” you continue for him, shivering again at the little groan Eddie lets escape from his throat. 
“Mm hm, real bad.” His eyes reappear, scanning over each part of your face. “So bad you wanna earn it. Wanna show me I was right to pick you and not some other girl. You get on your knees for me.” Eddie licks his lips quick. “And I know you’re kinda inexperienced, but it’s good, the best I’ve ever had. You know why?” You shake your head, gaze darting between his eyes and his mouth. You watch his lips move around his words. “Cause you’re so fucking grateful for it.” 
“Mm. And when I decide you’ve earned it, I lay you back on a couch somewhere. A green room or a tour bus or something. And I show you you were right to wait for me.” You shiver. It’s a delicious thrill to picture Eddie that way, completely new to you, a total stranger, yet so sure of what he can take. “And after that?” He says, giving the back of your neck a squeeze. “I keep you.”
“Eddie.” You feel your heartbeat between your legs, wishing he would touch you there now, or even put you on your knees the way he wants so you could show him you’re as grateful for him here and now as you are in his fantasy. 
The fantasy fades when Eddie kisses you. With the press of his lips, the taste of Dr Pepper on his tongue, he’s your Eddie again, familiar and perfect. You’re still floating back to Earth when he pulls away. “Your turn.”
You flinch, crashing to the ground instead. “What?”
“You like Latin, right? It’s quid pro quo, sweetheart. I show you mine, you show me yours. Tit for tat. That was the deal.”
“It was implied.” Eddie answers breezily. Then, with his thumb rubbing gently at the back of your hand. “C’mon. Try? You liked mine, right?” You give a barely noticeable nod, but Eddie catches it. “Yeah. And I bet I’ll like yours.”
“There was no deal!”
“I can’t- I don’t have it all, like, thought out the way you do.”
“Well, I’m a storyteller by trade,” he says, pressing his free hand to his chest. “All my sex fantasies have lore. And we can build on yours, if it needs it.Alright. I’m not Eddie the Chivalrous right now. Who am I?” He tilts his chin to where you have started playing with his rings, twisting each round his fingers in turn. “Apart from Eddie the Stress Toy.”
“It’s not- You’re just-” You swallow, rubbing your thumb over the metal skull sitting where a wedding ring would go. “You’re just somebody…somebody I shouldn’t want.”
“Intriguing. And you are?” Your face flames. You mumble it, barely opening your lips, and Eddie squints. “Mm?”
You sigh. “Princess.”
“Always,” Eddie replies, ducking his head to make sure you see his face, reassuringly still smiling. “Okay. I can work with this. Maybe I'm…Eddie the Banished. I tried to take power for myself by force but I failed.” He brings your hand to his mouth, kisses the thin skin at your wrist. “And I’ve returned, because I realised I don’t need to win a battle. I just have to…take the Princess?”
You clench around nothing. “Yeah.”
“Fuck, yeah. C’mon, sweet thing.” 
Your gaze follows him as he stands. “You want- Right now?”
“Why not? We’re all dressed up. The time is now.” Eddie pauses his excitement when he registers the fact you’re still sitting. “If…if you want.”
“I do,” you breathe. “But I can’t, y’know, talk like you.” You just know Eddie already has some dialogue thought up, things he can say as the character he’s just come up with that will make you dizzy. “I’ll get stuck.”
“Maybe you will, maybe you won’t,” Eddie says, squatting down in front of you, hands spread out on your knees. “I don’t mind taking the lead. Besides, the Princess would be kinda nervous anyway, right? If you’re not supposed to want me. The outlaw, the traitor. You’ve been told about all the terrible things I’ve done, what I tried to do for power. Now you feel guilty about what you really want from me. And I’ve been thinking about you while I’ve been on the run, living rough- You know, this is good stuff,” he says, interrupting himself and looking round. “You got a pen? I should maybe write some of this down- No. After, sorry.” He gives you a sheepish grin, then leans in close. “Don’t think there’s much chance I’ll forget this, anyway.” 
He stands then, hand extended to you with wiggling fingers for you to take and let him guide you through to his room. Eddie hums when his door is closed, shutting out the world beyond the frame. “Shoulda done this at yours,” he says, sitting you down on the mattress. “In your pretty Princess bed.”
“Doesn’t matter,” you say breathlessly, meaning it entirely. All that matters is it’s him. He’s the only person you could do something like this with. 
“Okay, I need a little more. You shouldn’t want me, I’m…morally grey, let’s say. Chaotic neutral. Am I mean?”
“Kinda,” you answer. “You’re…selfish?”
“Selfish,” he repeats. 
“Just like, y’know. It’s like-” Eddie’s hands spread at the sides of your thighs, teasing the skin at the hem of your skirt. You want them everywhere. “You know I want you. That I’ll…do things for you. And you take advantage. ”
There’s a pause. “I think I’m following. Things somebody like you shouldn’t do?” You nod quickly, cheeks burning as you watch him work it out. “You wanna get your mouth on me, Princess?”
You fight the instinct to hide, the urge to look away, the voice telling you to deny everything, take it back. Instead, you start playing with the hem of his shirt again, soft cotton between your fingers.  
“Mm hm.”
“Shit. Okay. Anything-” His voice cracks a touch, and he clears his throat before he speaks again. “Anything else?”
“It’s not like- Even though you’re mean, you still- With me, you feel-” Now you do have to look away, staring at where your fingers are fiddling with the black fabric. He can read you too well, and you don’t want him to see exactly what you want from him. “You-”
You love me. 
“I feel…how I feel about you?” He suggests.
You bite the gum behind your lip to stop yourself asking exactly what that means. “Yeah.”
“Okay, good. Hard to pretend anything else.” Eddie leans down to press a soft kiss to your lips, long enough that your whole body relaxes into it, your mind settling on Eddie, Eddie, Eddie. When he pulls away, it’s easy to answer his question. “Ready?”
“Ready.”
Eddie stands to full height, his shoulders back. He tilts his head, expression shifting. From your Eddie, with chestnut eyes and his perfect, dimpled smile, to a smirking man with a dark gaze excited to ruin you. 
“I’ve been looking for you, Princess,” he says, voice smooth and confident. A thrilled shiver runs up your spine. “Knew I’d find you eventually, but I could only hope I’d find you like this. All alone.” He takes a step towards you. “Unprotected-”
“Eddie,” you whisper. 
Softness peaks through with raised eyebrows. “Good?” You nod quickly, and it disappears again as he slinks closer towards you. “I missed you, while I was away,” he tells you, soft and teasing. “Did you miss me?”
“I-” You swallow. You’re used to repeating back what Eddie says to you, in times like this, letting him guide you through everything he wants to hear from you. But you don’t want to just watch him do this for you. “No.”
Eddie blinks, surprised, then he puts on a mockingly hurt face, hand over his heart. “No? You wound me, Princess.” That same hand reaches for your face, cupping your cheek. His thumb strokes gently under your eye and you can’t help but lean into him. “Or you would, if I believed you.” He tilts your head up to see him properly, standing over you. “You think I didn’t see the way you’d look at me, before I left?”
Your fingers twitch to reach out and brush at the ends of his hair as it falls towards you, but you keep them at your sides on the bed, curling into the sheets. “You didn’t leave, you-”
“Left, banished, driven out; it all comes to the same end, mm?” His eyes scan your face, down your dress and back up. “That’s you and me, Princess. Here, alone together. You gonna pretend you never wanted that?”
His thumb, callused and warm, keeps rubbing over your cheek. “I can’t want it”
“No, you can,” he presses. Eddie, your Eddie, would sit with you now, squat in front of you to talk to you at the same level. Now, his grip on your jaw tightens just enough to remind you that he could stop you looking away if you tried. “Cause I’ve had time to think about it.”
“While you were hiding in the woods?”
“While I was regrouping,” he corrects. “I realised something. I went about it all wrong.” he tells you. “It was foolish of me to try and use force to get what I want. Not when you were right here. Waiting for me.”
His thumb pulls at your bottom lip, then presses inside to the tip of your tongue. 
“If I make you mine, everything else follows. That’s right, isn’t it?” He nods slowly until you copy him. “The throne, power, vengeance on everyone who tried to hold me back. And you, in my bed every night. All day if I wanted.” He pulls at your lip again as he steals his thumb back, leaning in until his breath is warm against your cheeks. “That sounds nice. Doesn't it, Princess?” You glance at his lips, wanting him to kiss you now, to take it from you. Eddie shakes his head, drawing your gaze back to his. “I wanna hear you say it. You wanted me to touch you, just like this, and more, didn’t you? Wanted me to show you how to make me happy?”
You can feel your heartbeat heavy in your chest, your breath coming quicker. Only Eddie could do this, have you convinced of a story which before tonight only existed half formed in the fantasies of your bedroom. You can feel the internal conflict as if it really is your duty to say no, and your heart’s only desire to give your next answer.
“Yes, Eddie.”
He gives you a kiss that’s half teeth, dragging at your bottom lip. Even this is different. You’re used to the gentle start, feeling him smile on your mouth. He breathes deep through his nose, pulls from you so suddenly that you make to follow him until he presses a hand to your shoulder. 
“And I will. Get on the floor.” Eddie steps back, and it doesn’t even occur to argue with him now. You slide off the mattress easily, knees falling to the carpet without looking away from him. There’s a pause. He speaks quietly, as if he doesn’t want an invisible audience to hear. “You comfy? You want the pillow?” 
“No,” you answer, heart aching. “I’m okay.” 
“Okay.”
You watch the way he steels his face again, looking at you on your knees in front of him like that’s where you’re meant to be. His hands work at his belt, a soft hiss escaping when he presses his palm down the front of his pants. His head tilts back, displaying his thick neck, the rising pinkness across his pale throat, and he breathes a laugh. “Now, Princess- Wait!” You jump at the suddenness of Eddie pulling his hand from his pants only to clasp them at his waist as he half-jogs towards the door. “Just a second. Don’t move!” 
Eddie disappears through the door, mumbling to himself. His words are faint but it’s clear enough that he is looking for something. You close your eyes, focusing on his voice, however fuzzy. You never thought you could have something like this. Someone like Eddie. Someone safe. So safe that you can abandon yourself to fulfilling a silly fantasy thought up under the covers of your bed. 
Something catches your hair and you open your eyes to find him standing over you again. The tip of his tongue curls over his top lip as he places the plastic silver tiara just so on your head. When it’s as he wants it, his teeth show with his smile. “Perfect,” he says, pressing two fingers to your chin and turning your head each way. “My Princess, mm? I’m going to show you what it is to be mine.”
Eddie reaches into his pants to pull himself free. His hand drags over the shaft, quick and dirty, just for a moment’s relief if the clench of his jaw the second he stops is any indicator. 
You think you know what to do now, tipping your chin, opening your mouth, ready to take him. Only he angles his head away from your tongue. You peer up at him in confusion, watch the way his excitement plays out on his face. “C’mere, Princess.” 
Cupping your cheek with his spare hand, he guides you to the base of his cock, where he is softest. Your lips graze the fuzzy skin of his balls and Eddie makes a noise that has you squirming for the lightest touch between your legs. You kiss delicately, blinking up at him, watching his thumb rub over the head of his cock, catching wetness to ease the slow movement of his hand. He taps his fingers on your cheek gently. “Open up. Want your tongue.”
Your toes curl. You want to taste him here, aching at the smell of him; like his neck at the end of the day in Summer, his sweat and musk, fading body wash. You want to make Eddie feel good so badly, you think you might do whatever he asks as long as he looks at you the way he is now. 
You reach for him, palm settling on his knee where denim meets exposed skin. Opening your mouth, you lick quickly at the seam of his balls, taste salt on soft skin. He groans, fingers flexing around your jaw. “That’s it,” he encourages. “Fuck yes,” Eddie bites out when you lick broad and wet up to the base of his cock, thinking of his wide tongue drawing upwards from your pussy to your clit. “Fuck, yes.” 
He draws you back, smiling down at you. It makes your face burn, but you struggle between looking him in the eyes and staring at his cock. His balls are pink and wet from your attention, his hand moves steadily over his length, drawing folds of skin over his thick head and back.
“Want you to suck on them a little,” he tells you. The pause he leaves gives a moment for you to squeeze at his knee, as if presenting your open mouth wouldn’t be enough to show your agreement. He drags the weight of his balls over your chin to your wet tongue, listing off curses when your lips close just enough to suck gently. Eddie’s hand moves faster over his length, the curve of his fingers brushing your forehead with each tug.
Eddie’s groans are all that matter now. His sack is heavy, falling past your lips the wider you open your mouth. “So fuckin’ full cause of you,” Eddie bites. You hum, closing your eyes, his hips stutter. First towards the warmth of your mouth and then away entirely, replacing his sack with the head of his cock tapping against your tongue.
Eddie gasps when you lap at his leaking tip. “Can I-” He pauses, rephrases, puts on the right tone. “I’m gonna fuck your mouth now, Princess.” 
He watches you carefully, gives you time to tell him no. You squeeze his knee once more, gaze moving from his dark eyes to his cock. You press a quick kiss to the swollen head, a darker pink than the rest of him where it peeks through folds of skin, then let him press your head back against the mattress. 
Eddie’s cock glides smoothly over your tongue to the top of your throat. “Fuck,” he breathes, rolling his hips. “M’starting to think this is what you wanted the whole time.” He eases further, just past the entrance of your throat. It’s easier, like this. You are more open to him with your head tilted back this way. He holds himself in the warmth of your mouth, watching you blinking back tears to try and keep him clear in your gaze. Finally your throat protests, and Eddie draws back till you can suck at his head, the exposed length of his cock shining with your spit. You gaze at him, wanting him to be proud of you for taking him deeper than you have before. He makes a soft encouraging noise, but Eddie like this won’t give you the validation you want so easily. “Teased me for so long. I think I deserve to take what I want, now.”
Eddie thrusts slowly at first, easing you in despite his words. The hand that was on your cheek now stroking at your heated forehead. 
You like it like this. 
You liked having him in your mouth the first time, and every time after that. Like watching him shake, hearing him groan and whine, and knowing that you’re the one making him like that. You like focusing on him; lick here, nip there, let him feel you moan around him. Now, you don’t even have to think about how best to please him. You can focus on your breathing, taking air in through your nose when he pulls back enough. And on Eddie and how he looks as he takes his pleasure from you. 
Eddie’s so beautiful. His dark hair frizzes around his face, eyes crinkling at the sides when he closes them and groans into the air. His neck is pink, a pretty blush crawling up to his cheeks as his thrusts speed up. “We’re gonna do this all the time, Princess, you hear me?” He grits, fingers curling into the sheets at the side of your head. You moan in answer, pleased when it makes his cock twitch in your mouth, his tip dipping deep enough past the entrance of your throat that you can’t blink away the wetness that springs to your eyes. “You’re gonna be in my bed all the time, maybe I’ll tie you up, mm?” He presses deep again, then holds steady. When the tears collected at the corners of your eyes start to fall, he wipes them away before they can reach the apples of your cheeks. “Keep you here, just for me. Don’t need to see or talk to anyone else ever again.”
If your head weren’t fuzzy, you’d start questioning why that makes you ache. Eddie withdraws his cock from the top of your throat and you only take a second to gasp in the air you need before following him, reaching up to touch the inches of his cock your mouth still can’t quite cover. Eddie laughs through a moan at the feeling of you jerking his cock into your mouth, licking wet at the end of him. “You want that, huh? Hey-” He drags you away from his cock, leaving you with wet, pleading eyes looking up at him. “You want that?” Your mouth opens, then closes. Your hips roll, seeking friction you can’t get while kneeling like this. Eddie’s eyes flick down, lips turning up at the sight. “Get on the bed for me, mm?”
Eddie reaches a hand out to help you sit up on his mattress. Then he pulls his shirt off over the back of his head, exposing all the soft pale skin and dark ink of his torso. You pull your dress up too, knocking your tiara in the process. When the dress is off entirely, Eddie’s there in an instant to fix it for you, his fingers caressing your cheek when he’s done. “Hey, uh. Am I doing alright? Is this the sort of thing you imagined?”
“This is better,” you tell him earnestly, loving how pleased he looks. You’re learning that this, the pleasure gained from praise, is something you and Eddie share. You love it when Eddie calls you good, or smart, or sweet. When he tells you that you’re good at something he’s teaching you. In turn, Eddie likes it when you tell him how good he makes you feel, that he’s doing everything right, that he’s looking after you exactly how you want it. 
He kisses you, and it’s softer this time until he bites gently at your bottom lip as he’s pulling away. “C’mon and lie down, Princess,” he says, guiding you to lay down. You press your legs together, knees bent and feet flat to the mattress as Eddie climbs up after you. His hands stroke up and down your thighs, making you giggle softly as he passes ticklish spots. It relaxes you enough to let him guide your legs open and back, allowing him closer. Eddie tilts his head, thumbing the little blue bow at the waistband of your panties. “You really want me to tie you up?” 
Without thinking, you glance quickly at the handcuffs hanging from his door. You feel the beat of your heart against your chest, wondering if you’re ready for that, knowing really that you’re not. Eddie’s hand cups your cheek, directing your gaze back to him. He kisses your knee. “Not tonight, Princess.” He leans in, whispers. “And only ever if you really want, okay?”
“I know, Eddie,” you answer. And you do. You know that as much as Eddie is teaching you, seemingly leading you along to each new experience, in truth he’s making sure you set the pace. 
“Take this off for me,” he says, pulling at the strap of your bra. You reach underneath your back to unhook it, shimmying it off your arms and letting it drop to his floor. Once you’re settled, he takes both your hands in his, pulling them up over your head. You can’t help but giggle, feeling both nervous and giddy. “Hold onto the headboard?” You follow the instruction, wrapping your fingers around one of the wooden slats. Stretched like this, chest presented to him, you feel open and exposed, your nipples tightening from the cold air and from Eddie’s attention. “Don’t let go, mm?”
He leans down, kissing from the base of your neck down the skin between your breasts, his hair dragging behind him, tickling the sensitive skin. He leaves a wet mark on the curve of your left breast, the sting of his teeth quickly soothed by his tongue. When he takes the tight bud of your nipple between his lips, your whole body tenses. It’s a test of your submission, if you can last with only your memory of what it feels like to tangle your fingers in his hair. If you can bear not to tug at it when he flicks his tongue like that. 
Your hands tighten around the wood, hips tilting to find his cock where he tucked it back in his boxers, still hard and throbbing between your legs. The friction, however light, against where you have been waiting for him all evening, is too good to give up, and you keep searching for his hardness to rub against. 
Eddie releases your breasts with a grin. “You want it bad, huh, Princess?”
You whine, melting when he presses his hips forward to give you more delicious friction along your pussy. He huffs a laugh, sitting up and quickly reaching out for the pack of Trojans on his bedside. You watch him kneel between your legs, the way he fists his cock while he tears at the foil square with his teeth, his desperation to roll the condom over his length. Eddie shuffles forward on his knees and presses his wide hands to the back of your thighs. He gently guides your legs back, hitching your hips up for better access to your pussy, wet and swollen under his gaze.
“Wanted this for so long, Princess,” he says. “You’ve been waiting too, hmm?”
“Yes, Eddie. Been waiting so long.” You nearly cry from relief when his cock latches at your entrance, then from despair when he stills instead of filling you. The headboard creaks from your squirming. “Please,” you whisper, sounding pathetic in a way that would embarrass you if you weren’t aching from the emptiness.
Eddie stretches you perfectly as he presses inside your slick cunt. The tease of pain feels good now that your body recognises what it means, where Eddie filling you up leads. “Good?” He asks, once he’s deep enough inside that the curls of hair above his cock are teasing your clit. 
You mean to answer properly, but the intention is overtaken by the need for him to move. Waiting for him, your fingers tighten around the wood so much you swear there will be marks from your nails. “Eddie.” It comes out whinier than you intended, but he certainly doesn’t mind. 
“Eddie,” he mimics breathily, his teeth showing as the heat of pleasant humiliation crawls up your spine. He doesn’t keep you waiting any longer, snapping his hips to draw back and press deep again through your clenching cunt.
You’ve been under him every time, but like this you feel helpless. Hands voluntarily useless, body tilted up and legs opened by his hands, your body presented to him and positioned perfectly for him to set the pace. It feels right for this - you know now what the romance novels you hide under your bed mean when the heroine is taken. 
Your toes curl when Eddie’s hips roll just right, the heavy head of his cock hitting the end of you. When he reaches between you to press a thumb to your clit and rub in tight circles, your body tilts, hips trying to chase the pleasure, only for Eddie to press you back down to where he wants you.
“I like it,” you answer. “I like it, Eddie.”
“You like it, like this, hm?” Eddie asks. You blink at him slowly, wondering if it’s your boyfriend or Eddie the Banished asking. “Tell me.”
He shakes his head like he can’t believe it, hair shaking. “Knew you would. Pretty Princess just needed to be fucked right, mm?” You shudder, tightening around his cock enough that he gasps, “fuckfuckfuck. S’good. It’s so good, honey.”
You breathe a laugh. “Princess, to you.”
“My apologies,” he says, snapping his hips to land heavy against the spot at the back of your pussy. You gasp, legs kicking out against his grip involuntarily only for him to tighten his grip and push them back to where he wants them. You can hear how wet you are, the sound of him moving inside you as loud as the bed springs, as loud as your moans. “Mine now, aren’t you, Princess?” 
You nod easily. “Yes.”
“Gonna give me everything I want from now on, aren’t you?” 
“Yes. Yes-”
“Made it so easy for me. Should have just done this in the beginning, just taken you for myself.”
“Yes. Yes, Eddie.”
“Fuck,” he breathes, head tilting back as his hips speed up. “Fuck, I can’t- Can’t get enough of that.” When he looks back to you, the detached, mocking look is gone. He’s all intensity and warmth, your Eddie again. Your whole body tightens. “Tells me everything I need to know when you say my name like that.” He gives you a mean thrust, tongue peeking out as he watches where you’re connected, the slick coating his cock, before his gaze returns to your pleasured, sweaty face. “You’re so fucking good, you know that? So fucking good, the way you talk to me. Telling me what you want. Not gonna hide anything like that from me again, are you?”
“Nuh,” you manage, legs twitching. “Eddie.” 
”Again,” he gasps. “Please. My sweet girl-”
“Eddie. Eddie-”
Maybe you keep chanting his name, maybe you cry it out, maybe you stop altogether to scream out instead. You don’t know. You just know he’s all you’re thinking of as the pleasure crests, spreading out from the back of your cunt through your body until it’s intense enough you think you might cry. Then it fades to the gentle delight of Eddie still moving inside you, the warmth and weight of his cock when he buries himself deep. You hear him groan, feel the potential for bruises blooming where his fingers dig into your thighs. Then it’s his weight easing down on top of you, the ache in your shoulders and your legs as you let them relax before wrapping yourself around him.
You finally get your hands in his hair. The roots are damp from sweat, his curls tangled in knots. Eddie’s face is pressed so fully to the space between your breasts that you’re not convinced he can be breathing. He mumbles something that’s lost to your ears, then tilts his head up till you can see his face, and his goofy smile. Your heart aches even as you giggle. Then he’s crawling up your body to kiss you, his mouth warm and tasting like the sweat from his upper lip. 
“I’m gonna pull out now but I want it known that it’ll take amazing strength of will on my part.” 
He does so, disappearing from the bed for less than five seconds to throw out the condom before flopping next to you again and opening his arms to let you clamber into his hold again, you try to fight the rising worries by pressing your face into his neck. He hisses at the scrape of the plastic tiara under his chin, taking it off himself before returning to stroke at your temple with his fingers.  “How do you feel, sweet girl?”
It takes you a minute to answer, sorting through all the complicated feelings that emerged the second Eddie wasn’t inside you anymore. “Good,” you murmur. Then, “weird.” 
You hate how fast it all happens so soon after something so special. You feel overwhelmed and tired, like you want to scrub yourself raw under hot water, like you want to curl up in Eddie’s arms and smell like him forever. You feel like you don’t want to ever be touched again, but the thought that Eddie won’t makes your heart sore. You wish you were normal. You wish you didn’t have weird fantasies. You wish you didn’t feel guilty about what you want. 
Eddie holds you tight against him, and you let yourself feel the comfort of that. Eddie doesn’t think you’re weird, or gross, or immoral. Eddie won’t ever leave you alone to cry and scratch at your crawling skin. 
He presses his lips to your forehead, mumbles against your skin. “Gonna let me look after you?”
He keeps you with him while he runs a bath. You’re wrapped in a towel while he runs around naked, giving you mock coquettish looks over his shoulder every now and then until he gets a giggle from you. As steam starts to rise from the tub, he searches through the cabinet under the sink before emerging with a bottle filled with suspiciously bright orange liquid. “We don’t have bubble bath but, uh, this is six-in-one.” 
You try sitting in the water together, wrapped up in him, but the pins and needles come too fast, eight limbs not quite fitting as they should. You end up facing him, legs tucked up to your chest, watching the water drip from dark ends of his hair. 
“Not as romantic as I’d hoped,” he says.
“It’s okay. I like looking at you.”
His dimples show. Sweetest boy on Earth. He splashes at you a little, waiting for you to smile before talking. “Feeling better?” 
“Much,” you answer honestly. Somewhere between giggling at Eddie rushing to his bedroom to fetch towels for you both, a hair tie for you, with his hands covering the crack of his ass while leaving his dick uncovered and him quietly insisting on taking the side of the tub with the tap at his back, the grey cloud hanging over you faded. “Cause of you,” you say, splashing him back. 
Eddie smiles, resting his face against his knee. “Is there anything I can do, you know, to make it better, like, before it happens?” He reaches for your hand in the water. “Cause it hasn’t, in a while. I know that this was, like, different, but if I did something-”
“No,” you interrupt. “It wasn’t you.” Eddie lets that sit for a while, waiting for you to continue. “When it’s just me and you, it’s like-” You swallow. “Sometimes I feel like I’m being really, actually myself for the first time in my whole life.” Eddie’s eyes are so soft, looking at you now. “And I know that you won’t ever judge me for…my fantasies, or whatever. But then it’s like, it’s almost like- Like without even wanting to, I imagine what other people would say, if they knew the stuff I told you. If they saw how I am, when it’s just us. And then I just feel like, even though they’re not there, it’s ruined it.”
Eddie squeezes your hand, sighs with his whole body. “That sounds exhausting.”
Tears prick in your eyes even as you laugh without real mirth. “It is.”
“Well, you know this stuff really is always going to be just me and you. Right?” 
“I know, Eddie.”
“I wish I could fix it for you, sweet thing.”
You close your eyes tight, trying to force back the tears. You swallow the lump in your throat, thinking, me too. Instead, you sigh, remind yourself that however hard it is now, you’re sure it used to be worse. Before you had Eddie and his humour, his touch, his kindness. “You make it better, Eddie. I promise.”
He’s perfectly gentle with you the rest of the evening, curling back up with you on the couch when you’re dry to restart Theatre of Blood. You let yourself sink into his chest, playing with his rings. You are just about engrossed in the story again, watching with sick fascination as the first critic is stabbed like Julius Caesar. Then, a thought suddenly occurs.
“Did…did you say the soap was six-in-one?”
“Sure did,” Eddie answers. “Face, body, hair, laundry, pets and dishes.”
“That’s why it smells like the terrier next door.”
Eddie hums, lifts your hand to his face and sniffs. “You mean that’s why we smell like the terrier next door.”
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CATCH ME IF YOU CAN.
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BlackCat!Reader x Miles Morales Summary; Miles is defintely gonna catch you this time, right? A/N; I loved Felicia and Peter so much, even more so in PS4 game. They have a little saying to??? "Quiet as cat, sneaky as spider" and I just watched spider-verse SOOO,.,,,,SDKNASDJHAUIO i love me some Criminal x Hero heheheheh ill probably make a part 2 of this soon maybe.... Not proofread.
“Catch me if you can, Spidey!” 
And the rivalry began, you always got away, always leaving with a devious smirk on your face as you left with Diamonds in hand and Miles wondering who was behind the domino mask you always wear. But tonight was different, he’s definitely gonna catch you this time — he’s maybe gonna catch you this time. 
He was invisible, sticking to the roof of the museum waiting for you. It’s not like he had a vendetta with you or anything, you were just any other criminal —  who flirted with him sometimes, and made him smile sometimes. Which totally didn’t lead to you getting away or anything. 
You finally entered the museum, dropping down from the skylight with a rope landing on the ground with a silent thud. Cats do have to be quiet don’t they? Your heels clicked on the ground, as you walked over to one of the displays containing a diamond necklace worth over at least fifty five million dollars. Your hands reached out to it, cutting the display glass with your claws making a perfect circle. Your corners of your mouth upturned, smiling as you reached the display with both of your hands almost reaching it. 
“Fancy seeing you here,” Miles hanged from the ceiling with his web hanging upside down, finally revealing himself to you. 
“You were waiting for me?” You asked with a slight smirk on your face, looking up to him as you remove your hands from the display and cross your arms. 
“Well I figured a necklace like this would catch your eye,” 
“You know me so well spidey,” you replied smiling before, reaching back into the display to take the necklace for yourself. You put on the necklace, “Tell me spidey, does it look good on me?” you watch as he drops down from the ceiling, next to the display leaning on it crossing his arms and looking at you, “Everything looks good on you, but I thought cats liked fish more than diamonds?” he replied. 
Smiling, you take out your grappling hook from its holster. 
“Well a cat’s gotta pay off some debts, and diamonds fetch a real good price,” you point your grappling gun towards the skylight, quickly pulling the trigger you raise from the ground swinging up to the air almost to the exit before a web clings to your leg stopping you. 
“Y’know I’m gonna catch you right?” Miles said, holding the web with one hand, looking up at you. 
“You always let me go though,” You look down at him smirking, pulling a knife from your pocket severing the web letting you free. You pull yourself up, before looking down at him again blowing a kiss. 
“Not letting you go this time…” Miles mutters, swinging his way up there to catch you.
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squarenail · 7 months
Text
Some absolute nonsense inspired by @pfhwrittes recent post on British Wildlife.
T141 and the British Wildlife they’d lose to
Kyle: 🦊
Kyle Garrick feared no man. He’d looked plenty a terrorist in the eye, pulled the trigger to ensure they couldn’t hurt anyone again, throwing himself into unknown territories in the pursuit of world peace.
But this was no man.
This was a London Fox.
Kyle was trapped, helpless, watching his hard earned dinner be scarfed down by a mother and cubs who had all but robbed him at knife point for it. Some fights were not worth the trauma, and this was definitely one of them.
Simon: 🦔
Silence lay heavy across the dark country lane, disturbed only by the hissing of a newly crumpled car radiator.
“Unfucking believable” Simon muttered, perched on the rise of dirt that bordered the ditch his car was currently head first in.
He watched, hands twitching, as the hedgehog that caused him to swerve continued its slow plod across the road.
“Stupid spikey cunt” he thought, wondering just how mad Price is going to be that he’s totalled his 3rd job car this year.
John: 🪿 (I know it’s a swan, best I could do)
It took police 8 minutes to respond to the call at the beach. Concern for safety, said the log, for a man shouting at the sky. On arrival they were presented with old mutton chops himself, screaming at a seagull perched on the lifeguard post.
“You fucking feathery fucking cunting bastard, you wait till I get my hands on you, I’m going to rip you wing from wing you utter cunt”
The seagull, completely unbothered by the noise, continued to peck at the cigar it had mistaken for a sausage.
Johnny: 🐿️
“Ach ya wee prick” Johnny hollered, only managing to get to his feet by the time the squirrel had scaled the tree. A picnic in the forest seemed like a good date idea until his homemade trail-mix was clocked by the local wildlife.
“Johnny it’s fine, just come and sit down” his beau soothed.
“Naw. It’s the principle of the matter. Those walnuts were fucking expensive” he replied, never taking his eyes off the bushy tailed target hopping between branches.,
Johnny didn’t get a second date. Nor did he get his nut back. Apparently spending twenty minutes jumping to swipe at a squirrel and cussing out its da’ gave them ‘the ick’
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spookypete-94 · 2 months
Text
Dark Horse-Fight or Flight
Chapter 6
PricexFem!reader
PriceXFem!reader
Reader is a single mother, working double shifts at a restaurant. Father of the child starts to become a problem while reader is at work and Price offers a solution. Slight age gap between reader around 25 and Price around 35. Will be around 3-5 Chapters once finished (Probably will be more about 6-8 chapters total now)
Sorry its been a bit for an update. Finally moving up in shifts and got to bid days is leaving me trying to find time to write. 7 months pregnant and tired all the time too isn't exactly helping.
This one might get a little dark (drowning/death/language), coming to wrap this one up. Might be two more chapters left.
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John's activities went on for a few hours into the night. Starting in the living room and ending in the bedroom. Somehow, through all the activity, you awoke still on your schedule. The morning light beamed in golden rays next to the side of the bed. Yesterday was so extraordinary, but here it returned to normal routine once more.
John laid next to you, on his stomach arms folded underneath a pillow holding it close. His legs still strewn in with yours. Carefully pulling them out of the entangled snare, you slipped away quietly heading to the bathroom to get showered for work. Today, you would talk to Kate about transitioning to part time... for the first time in your life.
Part time...Only partly at work. More time at home. More time with Abel. More time with your husband.
The shower curtain being pulled back startled you, making jump dropping the bottle of soap on to the bottom of the shower.
"Ya' tellin' me ya wan' somethin'... or...," John's morning voice rumbled from his chest, making a slight innuendo as he bent down to pick up your soap. On the way back up he greeted you with raised eyebrows and a cheeky smile.
"Ha-ha," you announced sarcastically. "Forgive me, I don't have many that join me in the shower."
"Better start gettin' used to it, takin' any chance I get. Could of woke me, would of joined you sooner." He had taken your loofah and dumped soap on it, starting to wash you.
"You were sleeping."
"Want to take you on a honeymoon sometime, feels strange not doing something after were married. Untraditional." He said kissing the back of your wet head.
"No offense, I'm grateful but this whole thing was kind of untraditional."
"Do you regret it?"
Instantly you shook your head. "No," quickly escaped your mouth. The regret or hesitance better labeled left you sometime yesterday. This was no doubt now in your head the best choice. It's always been you and Abel. Part of you longed for someone else to fill that void... But Abel's father was never qualified to fill that position. John's over qualified.
Upon reward for your eager answer, John's hand slipped off the loofah and further down your body.
***********************************
John and Abel joined you at your morning shift for breakfast. Both sitting at the counter while you waited tables. John had already asked Abel if he wanted to join him and the others for a fishing trip for the weekend.
The young boy excited to partake with something in the outdoors. Abel's father had always wanted him to stay indoors with him and played video games, which was fine. But you had noticed that Abel's soul often craved more. He was a boy who had a hard time sitting still for long periods of time. Maybe this was the answer he needed. All very clearly over 6'0 ft and pure man and willing to teach.
If you'd of asked yourself a few days ago, never in a million years would of sent your son off with someone you had just got to know. However there was something about John that made you trust him. You would give him your soul... bound to your bone and blood.
It didn't take long for John's strays to find and join him. Taking a seat further extending your counter. It really was a sight to see, four very large, very built, very dangerous men... and there sat little Abel. It would of been worth a picture to you if you had time to take one.
"Wanna wish you an' the Captain a Congrats," the one you had learned as Gaz started off.
"Congrats indeed, he's lucky he fund ya firs', bonnie lass," "Soap" joined in. "Any o' us would of made you a wife jus' as quick."
Very quickly you dropped their plates in front of them, your cheeks burning red and walking away. It made laughter erupt from Soap, while John side eyed him carefully.
"Easy Mactavish, can't scare the help away." Ghost, the giant always in black said, giving a slight pop on the back of Soap's head.
"I don' mean nuthin' by it, just happy for the Cap' is all."
John's watchful eye dropped back to yours were he sighed.
"Sorry love, why I meant we don't feed the strays. They don't deserve it."
All of them groaned loudly at his words.
"We haven't even left yet, and you're already making him mad." Gaz said elbowing Soap.
Ghost had rolled his mask halfway up his face to eat his breakfast making Abel lean forward to look at him. John had told you enough that Ghost wears the mask to stay anonymous to people having "died" years ago.
"Abel..." your voice warned, trying to keep him from being rude. Ghost's eyes glanced down towards Abel, as if asking him what he wanted.
"Yes?" Ghost acknowledged him.
"What do you look like under there?" His quiet shy voice asked.
"An ugly mug," Soap answered long before anyone else could. Again the laughter echoed in the diner.
"Quite the loud bunch," Kate said brushing past you grabbing a coffee pot.
"Won' be here long, Kate." John said trying to curb her building anxiety.
"Would like to talk to you later today." Your courage finally building having a second to talk to her.
"Not quitting on me are you?" Blunt. Straight to the point. Kate was never one for beating around the bush.
"No... not exactly."
"After the rush. We'll sit down take break and you can tell me what's going on."
***********************************
Little arms wrapped around our waist, Abel buried his face in your abdomen.
"Love you, mom."
Stroking his hair back you leaned down, inhaling his hair.
"Always love you more."
Just like that he ripped himself from you, running to the vehicle they had all packed to go on their little "trip". Sure, Abel spent weekends away from you with his dad before... but this felt different. You wanted to bond as a family, but it was important that Abel and John bond together as well.
"Gonna be alright, love?" John asked arm wrapping around your shoulders and pulling him into you.
"Yeah..." you muttered into his shoulder, laying your head against it.
"Just one night, we will be back tomorrow before noon."
It was like he knew you through and through. Like he was looking past glass and could see what was making you tick.
"Just one night." You mirrored back at him, trying to convince yourself.
"Wouldn' even worry about it, if I hadn't of promised the others when we got back."
"You need your time too, John."
"And so do you, relax at home for once." He said rubbing your arms and kissing your forehead before tilting your head up and planting a gentle kiss on you.
"Besides, had you busy enough for the past couple of days, you could use the break." The same smirky smile and attitude from your shower together returning. It made you pat his chest lightly with a little slap, your way of telling him to get going. It made him chuckle, the rumble you have come to love echo from him.
You waved goodbye to all of them, Abel's hand slipping out the window at to you. They disappeared turning a corner to go out of town, and there you stood all on your own.
Going back inside, there sat Kate, two pieces of pie and two cups of coffee. The sugar and caffeine trick to get you ready to the next "rush" as she calls them.
"Probably shouldn't let you have coffee, knowing you could be pregnant." She teased, making you roll your eyes.
"Haven't I been picked on enough today?" Referring to the earlier banter.
"Come on, sit down and tell me what's going on." She said still laughing quietly, patting the seat next to her.
***********************************
The walk home was quiet, peaceful. Kate had taken the information well, telling you she had started to expect it and was honestly happy for you. This whole feeling was alien to you, spending most of your life struggling for the things you had or being in fight and flight mode.
Tonight, the first night you had to yourself in ages. The possibilities were endless, but still it seemed your heart wanted one thing. To be with Abel. He needs this you reminded yourself. You needed this too.
Stopping at the store on your way home, buying a bottle of wine to pair with your burger and fries you had brought home for dinner. You glanced at it while pulling it out of the brown bag the store had hidden in it. Still trying to be a responsible adult, working on your daily chores, you then ran a bath and ate your supper.
Glass of wine in one hand, you slipped into the bath, resting the bottle next to you on the table. near by. The water was hot, scalding your skin, but it felt so nice to be engulfed by it all while you soaked. Propping your legs up on the tub, toes out of the water, you sent John a picture. Trying to communicate without being over bearing, missing them both still.
"You just send my kid out with random people?" A voice asked coming from the open bathroom door making you jump and look over.
There stood your ex... impending doom in the doorway.
"What are you doing here??" You asked sitting up, fear rising within.
He bolted to you, one hand at your neck pushing you under. The water was even hotter inside your body. Quickly filling your lungs, air leaving your cells.
You tried to scream, instead it left your body in large ripples floating to the top were they popped. Useless, it was futile. The feeling of fight or flight returning once more... and you couldn't leave. You have to fight.
Wrapping a hand around his arm, you grabbed and squeeze digging trying hard to push him back.
There was recoil as he brought you back up from the water.
"Fuckin' dumb bitch!"
Heavy large waves of water pouring off of you and back into the tub made it hard to hear, but he was close and loud enough you could make out every syllable and vowel. Rage and hatred dripping off his words.
"You know what I'm gonna do?" He dangerously asked. The tone matter of fact. Finally striking you as rhetorical. He wasn't worried about what he was going to do, as much as he was making you pay.
"I'm going to hold you underwater, let them think you drown. I'm going to clean up the water, refill the tub. You're already drinking, making this easy for me." he said gesturing to the broken wine glass on the floor. "You'll be dead and look like a drunk. I'll have Abel full custody then. What a terrible mother," mockingly.
There he forced you back into the water and down to the bottom.
"No!" You shrieked trying to resist, still unable to.
The battle started all over again... The blazing feeling of the water. Who knew water could burn? Your tongue was heavy in your mouth, the urge to get up leaving you.
Splashes and splashes of your spent oxygen rising to the top, towards your attacker. Your last gift to him.
Fight or flight.
War. This means war and death and you were picking yourself, tired of bowing to this man.
Your hand reached up pulling up on the tub, reaching, passing, bucking. Finally finding the bottle you gripped it, swinging as hard as you could. It smacked him, making him let go. Breaking, wine mixing with the matter on the floor, blood soon following. A large gash was on the side of his head, but he was still conscious. His hands reaching for you again, making you strike him once more. More of the bottle breaking, shards flying out and into his flesh.
Down he went, body lying on the floor. His face was hacked, skin and muscle torn down from his head to neck and into his shoulder.
It looked like an animal was let lose, like a bear had mauled him. The bathroom an entire wreck. Eyes wide as you glanced up in the mirror. Your skin red from where he had a grip of you.
Where was your phone?? You needed to call. You needed to call him now.
Finally you found it near the tub on the floor, covered in water. Reaching for it you tried to wipe the excess off... praying and hoping it worked. By the grace of gods, it somehow lit up. A new text message from John blessed the screen.
Looks nice love. Meaning the picture you had sent before the attack took place. Oh, how ironic.
Using it as a shortcut, you called him. Instantly he knew from how you were breathing something had happened.
"Love?? What's wrong?"
"He broke in." A sob, loud breaking your words after.
"He still there?" Hastily asked.
"Yes... but."
"But what dear?"
"I...he's..Hes dead!" you wept.
"I'm comin'."
"No, Abel will know somethings wrong." It was short and choppy. Relayed in away that you hoped he understood. You didn't want Abel to see this. You didn't want him to know you had killed his father.
John was quiet for a moment trying to come up with a solution.
"I'm sending, Simon." His next trusted, next in lead to come help you.
There, John listened to you cry, trying to motivate you to get dressed before Simon got there.
Finally, you had enough nerve to get out, finding simple clothes. A T-shirt of Johns on and a pair of shorts. Huffing the material of his trying to find peace and the ability to stay sane...A knock at the door breaking your temporary peace, bringing you back to your bloody reality.
Carefully you opened your door a crack, brown eyes behind smudged eye black and mask waiting for you.
"You ok?" he asked waiting for you to open the door fully.
Breaking the threshold, you pushed the door open for him. Simon stepped full foot in, scanning his eyes over you looking for injuries before turning the way you were pointing.
You followed him, but him stopping in the living room made you confused. Looking around there you saw curtains billowing. Simon approached it pulling them back looking through the window, the screen down on the ground.
Your ex had popped it off and crawled through...
"How he got in without you knowin'," Simon said dropping the curtains heading back towards the bathroom.
"Steamin' Jesus," His voice quiet. Harsh whisper as he looked at the literal blood bath in front of him.
"Put up quite the fight didn' ya'?" He asked looking over his shoulder sympathy in his voice.
"I tried."
Simon grabbed a towel placing it over the mixture of blood, wine, water and glass, sliding it away. Pushing his way through the debris to get to him.
Both of you jumped and startled as your ex groaned on the floor.
"Did you make sure he was dead?" Simon asked, almost like he was shocked that you hadn't.
"No!" fear settling back in to your bones.
Simon dropped a foot on his chest, a loud groan leaving him. Clearly very much still alive.
"Go back out an' shut the door." His voice low, matching what you were sure the one he used in a warzone.
"GO." he said louder and firmer. You watched as your ex's hands reached around his leg attempting to push him off. Simon replied with a harder press making him cry out... This you realized was Ghost.
"Gonna finish what she started, and end this problem once an' for all." Ghost's growled reaching down, your ex screaming. The fear he must feel seeing death stand before and on him... His last gift to you.
Just as soon as it had started, it stopped. You dare not ask Simon how he ended it... but part of you relieved it would never happen again... this would never happen again.
The door finally opened where he dried his hands off.
"Next time, sweethear'. Make sure they are dead."
Next time? you wanted to say. Next time?
Like this was so easy for him, like they all did it for a liviung
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fluentmoviequoter · 9 months
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Imagine: being in a long distance relationship with deacon and you surprise him at home. He doesn’t know it and is still at the HQ. Hondo knows about your surprise and sends him home with a knowing smile after the shift. When Deacon comes home he finds you sleeping in his bed
Oh my gosh, this is adorable. I'm not totally sure if you wanted a fic or not, but I wrote one! I hope you like it and please let me know what you think!
Warnings: fluff!
Word Count: 1.3k+ words
Picture from Pinterest
Long Distance to the Future
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Since you left Los Angeles to take a new job across the country, you’ve stayed committed to Deacon and he to you. The job is supposed to be temporary, only it is indefinitely temporary. It’s been nearly three years since you started dating Deacon, but it will be your first anniversary away from him. It would be a lie to say long distance is easy, but it’s worth it. You haven’t used a single vacation day since you started, so you’re checking the price of flights to LAX, hoping you can afford to surprise Deacon for your anniversary. The first few months of long-distance were surprisingly easy since you were getting settled and forming a new routine, but now that things are settled, you miss Deacon more than anything. The screen finally loads, and you cheer in your quiet bedroom when the low price appears. You quickly book your ticket, prepared to see Deacon in person again. You text Hondo and ask him to call when he has time, hoping to get his help in the surprise.
Your phone rings less than a minute later, and you answer before the second ring. “Hello?” you greet, expecting Hondo.
“I have big news!” your boss cheers. “You got the promotion; if you want it, its yours!”
“Are you serious?” you ask, experiencing the second miracle in less than ten minutes. “This is such an honour, I don’t know what to say.”
“Think it over for a day or two then let me know, okay? Congratulations, you deserve it!”
“Thank you! I- can I sign the contract while I’m on my trip?”
“Oh, I forgot you’re off this week. Yes, we can do it online or we can just get a written acceptance and handle the paperwork when you get back. I’ll let you get back to your vacation, but I couldn’t wait to tell you. Have a great time and talk soon.”
The call ends, and you lay back on your bed, kicking your feet up in excitement. Your phone rings again, and you see Hondo’s name, smiling as the pieces of your plan begin falling into place.
✯✯✯✯✯
The landing in LA is a little bumpy, but nothing can take the smile off your face. You practically skip through the airport, energized by your countdowns until you are back in the same time zone, state, county, and now, city as your boyfriend. Hondo is leaning against his car, smiling, when you walk out.
“Thank you so much,” you tell him, hugging him before he takes your bag to put in the trunk.
“I should be thanking you. He misses you,” Hondo replies as he opens your door.
“I missed him, too.”
“When do you leave?”
You let the question hang, waiting until Hondo is in the driver’s seat with the door closed to answer, “About that.”
✯✯✯✯✯
Hondo drops you off at Deacon’s house, giving you his spare key to get inside before Deacon returns from work. Waving at Hondo, you go inside and lock the door behind you. You leave all of the lights off and hide your shoes and bags in Deacon’s closet so there is no evidence of you visible when he walks in. Checking your watch, you see that Deacon should be home in about an hour, so you order his favorite food for dinner and wait in the kitchen, away from the windows (in case he gets home early), for the delivery. Once the food is dropped off, you hide the containers in the microwave and throw away the bag before walking to Deacon’s bedroom to wait. The adrenaline is wearing off, and you’re getting tired, even though you know Deacon should be home soon. Sitting on the edge of his bed, you wipe your eyes before realizing how tired you are. You yawn once and fail to find the motivation to get back up.
✯✯✯✯✯
“Alright, Deac, head out and get some rest,” Hondo says. “The rest of us got behind on our paperwork.”
“Okay,” Deacon says, his brows furrowed as he walks by. “Have a good night, guys. Don’t work too hard.”
He walks out to his car, a little suspicious as to why Hondo seemed so eager to send him home, but he’s tired and misses you, so he’s okay with a quiet night at his house.
Parking in his driveway, Deacon sighs before exiting the car and going inside. He puts his backpack in the front closet and then walks toward his bedroom, ignoring the kitchen and planning to order food later. When he walks into his bedroom, he freezes, part of his mind telling him to get a weapon while the other works on recognizing who is sleeping on his bed.
He whispers your name and smiles when you move your arm, exposing your face. He sits on the edge of the bed beside you and lays a hand on your back, leaning down to kiss your temple. You stir slightly under his touch, unconsciously moving closer to him.
Running his fingers over your hairline and down your jawline, Deacon keeps his attention on you, questions to ask when you wake up flooding his mind.
You stir again and crack your eyes open. When you see Deacon, you sit up slightly and blink before asking, “Deacon?”
He nods, slipping his arm around your waist to help you sit up. You lean against him and look up into his eyes. You missed his eyes.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to fall asleep, I was trying to surprise you and didn’t realize how tired I was, I guess,” you apologize, pinching Deacon's shirt collar between your fingers.
He takes your chin between his forefinger and thumb, looking into your eyes as he speaks. “Don’t apologize. I’m so happy to see you. Why am I seeing you?”
You laugh at his question, leaning against him as he twists you so your legs are draped across his lap as he leans against his headboard.
“I had a bunch of vacation days built up and.. I really wanted to see you. I missed you so much and our anniversary is coming up,” you explain.
“I didn’t want to be alone,” you and Deacon say together.
“Well, it’s an excellent surprise. You didn’t leave any evidence you were here. Although, how did you get in?”
“Hondo let me use his key.”
“Hondo. Of course. That’s why he wanted me to go straight home. Are you hungry?”
“I ordered food. It’s hidden in your kitchen,” you reply.
“You’re amazing.”
“I know. You’re pretty amazing, too.”
“This was an excellent surprise. Thank you,” Deacon says as he pulls you to your feet.
“There is one more thing,” you say, squeezing his hand.
“Okay,” Deacon says slowly.
“I got a promotion.”
Deacon’s eyes widen as he picks you up, twirling you around. You laugh, holding onto his shoulders. Your hands stay on his shoulders as he sets you back down.
“That’s amazing! Congratulations, you deserve it!”
“That’s not the good part.”
“What’s the good part? That seems pretty good.”
You lean up, close enough to kiss him, as you say, “It’s in Los Angeles.”
Deacon closes the small gap, kissing you like you’re his source of life. When you finally pull back, breathless and feeling whole with Deacon in your arms, you know you made the right decision to come home and take the job.
“Did you forget about the food?” you ask, laughing as Deacon kisses your cheek.
“We can reheat that. I had food earlier, I haven’t seen you in,” he looks at his watch to say, “11 months, 2 weeks, and 14 hours.”
“No minutes?” you ask.
“Just this one,” he replies, pulling you in just to push you backward onto the bed where he found you.
You laugh and cup his face in your hands. “I love you, Deacon Kay.”
“I love you,” Deacon says, his eyes glancing toward the top drawer of his nightstand, where a black velvet box is hidden. Future Mrs. Kay, he adds to himself.
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eco-lite · 3 months
Text
My favorite moments from David Mack's Control. Most of them are Garak, even though he's barely in this book...
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[Text ID: “’I'm well aware that you're all fugitives of the highest order in the Federation. Nothing new for you, Doctor, or for your inamorata"—he let contempt drip off that last word—"though I have to imagine being the target of an interstellar dragnet must be something of a new experience for your friends.’” End ID]
Okay this is hilarious. David Mack establishes that Sarina Douglas (the genetically-engineered woman Julian helps in "Statistical Probabilities." Remember her?) and Julian have been in a relationship for a while, but he's also clearly a garashir shipper who loves to make Garak suffer. Jealous!Garak my beloved.
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[Text ID: “Garak shot a wary look at his bodyguards, then he moved closer to Bashir. ‘Are you asking as a Starfleet officer? As a doctor? Or as a man in need of asylum?’ ‘I'm asking as your friend.... Help us, Elim.’ It might have been nothing more than Bashir's imagination, but he thought he saw the faintest hint of jealousy in Garak's eyes when the castellan glanced at Sarina. But then Garak looked back at Bashir and smiled. ‘Very well, Julian. For an old friend... anything is possible.’” End ID]
Poor Garak. This is truly painful. Especially since Julian recognizes his jealousy and doesn't ever address it.
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[Text ID: “’Executions without judicial oversight? It's an obscenity masquerading as national security.’  ‘Yes. And it's also how the Obsidian Order kept total control over the Cardassian Union for nearly a century.’ That put an end to Bashir's perambulation. ‘Wait, no. I didn't mean to say—' ‘That any part of the Federation could ever have anything in common with the Obsidian Order? Or with the Tal Shiar? Oh, how I envy your naïveté, Doctor. To believe that any nation state could ever endure without having an appendage willing to stain itself in blood—what a luxury it must be to live in the arms of such delusion.’ He expected a tirade from Bashir. A red-faced defense of the Federation's principles, its integrity, its virtue. Instead the doctor reined in his dudgeon and approached Garak's desk. He set his knuckles on the polished wood and bowed his head while he drew a calming breath. ‘I can't deny there's rot in the core of Starfleet. In the heart of the Federation. I've seen it.’ He looked up at Garak, and his eyes had the hard, unyielding focus of a man ready to go to war. ‘I came to you because I need to know how to stop it. How to end it. How to destroy it.’ ‘Well, that's simple, Doctor. What worked for Cardassia will work for the Federation. To excise this cancer from your body politic, all you need to do is kill the body, burn it down to ash, then resurrect and rebuild it with wiser eyes and a sadder heart.’ Bashir's brow creased with scorn. ‘You mock me.’ ‘Not at all, Doctor. You saw what happened to this world at the end of the Dominion War—to all the planets of the Cardassian Union. The Dominion burned us to the ground. Slew all but a fraction of our population. Left us with nothing but cinders and cenotaphs. That is what it took to free Cardassia from the grip of the Obsidian Order. Are you ready to pay that price so the people of the Federation can bask in the purity of their liberty? Is it worth the blood of billions? Is it worth seeing your worlds on fire?’ ‘You make it sound as if there's no middle ground,’ Bashir protested. ‘No choice besides surrender or slaughter.’ Garak saw no reason to blunt the truth's cutting edge. ‘Why else would such programs exist, Doctor? What is the value of intelligence if it doesn't lead to action?’ This time Bashir rose to Garak's challenge. ‘What is the value of action if it betrays all that we stand for?’ His shoulders slumped as if they bore a terrible weight. ‘Garak, I didn't come here to be lectured, or to be told I'm too idealistic. I came here for advice.’ ‘Of what sort?’ ‘The kind that will help me stop Thirty-one. Permanently.’ Maybe the doctor was foolhardy. Perhaps his mission was doomed to fail. But there was no denying the man possessed the courage of his convictions. Garak tried to remember what that had felt like in his long-ago squandered youth—and then he realized, to his shame, that he had never known the sweet sting of such passions. ‘If you want to kill Section Thirty-one,’ he said, ‘you'll need to turn their greatest strength against them—transform it into their most dire weakness. They thrive on secrecy, on anonymity, just as the Obsidian Order once did. Take that away from them. Expose them and they'll be vulnerable—and that's when you strike the killing blow.’ He set his palms on the desktop and leaned forward to emphasize his final piece of counsel. ‘But make sure you leave nothing of your enemy intact. When your work is done, don't try to turn their assets to your advantage. Destroy them all, every last one—or else the monster will simply rise again.’” End ID]
Although the concept and plot of this book is really interesting, I was generally not impressed by the characterization in this book. But Garak is an exception. I love this passage because it's a brief return to Garak and Julian's cherished philosophical debates. And it so perfectly encapsulates Garak's world-view after all he's been through. He's under no delusions of how far a society will go to "protect itself." Or how hard it can be to dismantle a broken system. He's experienced both tragedies first-hand.
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[Text ID: “’The codicil concerning Doctor Bashir indicated a ninety-four percent likelihood that he would seek the aid of his former lover and Deep Space Nine crewmate, Captain Ezri Dax. Instead, he ran to Castellan Elim Garak.’" End ID]
Ha. That's telling, isn't it...
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[Text ID: “’Have you considered the possibility that you've chosen the wrong side?’ The question felt to Bashir like a vote of no confidence. He hoped he had heard Garak wrong. ‘What do you mean, the wrong side?’ ‘I merely mean to ask, Julian, if you've ever stopped to entertain the notion that perhaps Section Thirty-one serves a valid purpose?’ The question itself offended Bashir. ‘Don't be absurd, Garak. Thirty-one wields deadly power with absolutely no legal accountability or oversight. It commits countless crimes against Federation citizens and foreign peoples. It steals, defrauds, counterfeits, murders. It acts in the name of the Federation while betraying every principle for which we stand. Its continued existence is an insult to our entire civilization.’ Garak struck an imperious pose. ‘Really? An insult? What if that insult to your Federation is the only reason it still exists?’ He prowled forward, crossing Bashir's imaginary boundary of personal space. ‘Every nation-state in history has relied, at one time or another, on the services of such organizations for their very survival. Why should yours be any different?’” End ID]
Devil's advocate as always. But Garak has a point. Cardassia was only able to maintain it's strictly military society--the status quo--because of the Obsidian Order. Based on his own experience, it's reasonable to think that Section Thirty-one may be the only thing holding the Federation together. No matter how much its actions go against the holier-than-thou principles the Federation claims to uphold.
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[Text ID: “’Beliefs are dangerous things, Julian. Once we invest in them, it can be hard to challenge them without invoking cognitive dissonance. But in this case, I suggest you try. Because if I'm correct, going to war with Section Thirty-one can only end badly for you. Either you will lose, and you and all your friends will suffer gruesome fates I'd rather not imagine; or you will win—and in so doing, end up inflicting more harm than good upon your beloved Federation.’" End ID]
Not Garak trying to predict the ending of the book. Somehow the real ending was a mix of both. And that "beliefs are dangerous things" line... Yeah.
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[Text ID: (Referring to the décor of the Federation Headquarters in Paris, which is scientifically constructed to be soothing and discourage potential violent behavior) “Like the Federation's pervasive imperialism, the lobby's social controls were subtle and hideously effective.” End ID]
Damn, you said it, not me. I do love this book's determination to deconstruct every charitable feeling the reader might have about the Federation.
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[Text ID: “Alone with Bashir, Garak looked at his friend. He circled in front of him. ‘Are you still with me, my dear doctor?’ He squatted in front of the hoverchair and tried in vain to make eye contact with his friend. ‘Are you blind to the sight of me? Deaf to the music of my voice?’ Bashir's silence and his wounded stare into an empty distance disturbed Garak in ways he feared to confront. This was not the man he remembered from Deep Space 9, or the confidant with whom he had trusted his private musings in the aftermath of the Dominion War. This man was detached from the world, in it but separated from it by a barrier as unbreachable as it was intangible. This was the shattered husk of a good man, the sorry remains of one who had refused to bend to the cruelties of the world and ended up broken instead.” End ID]
I didn't realize this book leads directly into Una McCormack's Enigma Tales (excellent book, go read it!) until this point. That knowledge makes this moment hurt more, I think.
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[Text ID: “There was naught left for Garak to do now but keep his friend safe, in a clean and well-lit place, and give him whatever time he needed to heal himself—or at least to die in peace, with his last measure of privacy intact and jealously guarded by someone who loved him.” End ID]
Time to curl up in a ball and stare into the middle distance for a while...
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schizochroal · 1 year
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I think, right now if you're a transfem or trans woman, with any sort of income and address, in the US right now, who wants to go on hrt but for whatever reason you are waiting, I think you should seriously reconsider that. DIYing is still relatively accessible, and along with estrogen, while Spiro isn't the best anti-androgen it does the job for most people and is dirt cheap and easy to get. If you live somewhere and have the insurance or other means to afford it, I'd also recommend pursuing official medical hrt as well, but keep in mind that depending on restrictions put in place in the future, you might need to switch to DIYing. That being said, starting officially and then switching to DIY after a certain point really isn't that bad at all, hormone testing and stuff becomes much less important after the first couple of years. If you have insurance (and the right kind) , it could be basically free for you to pursue the official route, if ur insurance won't pay for it the doctors appointments will be expensive but you probably won't be spending more than 20$ a month for your hrt, assuming you go for something like Spiro as an anti-androgen. Even if you art totally DIYing , you're still probably not going to be spending more than a 30$ or so dollars a month for hrt, and I know it's possible to pay way less than that depending on some factors.
I live somewhere with pretty high food costs, so for me that kinda cost is the difference between say getting eating like just some rice and beans or something a couples nights in a month instead of getting fast food or whatever. Tbh most of the people I know are pretty poor by American standards, but still make random purchases on stuff like food , video games, clothes, caffeine, weed, etc. that are a lot more than they would need to pay for hrt even at full DIY prices.
Like if you're holding off for financial or other reasons, I think you really should seriously consider whether those reasons are worth continuing to put it off when in all likelihood beginning hrt is only gonna get harder in the future, and every year you wait is another year you could instead spend living the life you actually want.
Starting is always scary, but like nothing about HRT is instantaneous, depending on ur hair and fashion you can probably guarantee that u can still fly under the radar for at least a year after starting hrt, potentially a lot longer. And a year is a long time to figure out if uve jumped the gun and it really would be better for you to wait, and for the most part it takes a long time for any non-reversible changes to happen (other than maybe some breast growth, but like plenty of cis guys have gynecomastia, it's not that big of a deal). But the only way you're going to be able to find that out is if you start. And honestly, outside of some very specific individuals, I think for most of us there is not going to be another, better time to start her anytime in the near future!
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