#the who the hell is sans quote gets me every time

[positivexcellence]

‘Walker’s Jared Padalecki Shares a Look at What’s to Come in Season 4

Collider: You’re four seasons into this TV series now, which isn’t the 15 seasons that Supernatural was on the air, but it’s a very respectable amount of time.

JARED PADALECKI: Thank you so much. Hopefully, we’ll have 40 more. But Season 4 is certainly bizarre and amazing and incredible, and I’m grateful and flattered and love the journey these characters have gone through.

What are you loving about Season 4 and about the Cordell Walker of Season 4? What are you most enjoying about this point of the journey?

PADALECKI: With Supernatural, we would flip between maybe the big bad guy and then the problems at home or with the brothers. But in the case of Walker, we will go from big bad guy to family stuff to bad guy of the week to family stuff. Just like life is, it gets big sometimes and it gets small sometimes, but there’s always some issue. And so, what I love about Season 4 is having a serial killer out there that is from our past and that haunted us back then and is sure to haunt us again this season, as The Jackal does, and also, there’s so much drama at home. Cordell has a daughter who’s a freshman in college and a son who’s a senior in high school. Mom and dad are trying to figure out what to do. His brother is trying to figure out what to do. It’s just that feeling that we all get, as humans and as adults, where it feels like, “Can’t just one part of my life calm down?” And sure as hell, it never does.

It feels like this show was originally brought back to television because there was a real hole in this type of programming at that time, and I’m glad the series is still on because it still feels like it’s really needed in that space.

PADALECKI: Agreed. What’s funny is that I grew up in Texas. I grew up in San Antonio. I’ve lived in Austin for 15 years. I grew up watching Walker, Texas Ranger with Sir Chuck Norris, himself, so that was a part of my childhood. For those who’ve seen the original and seen ours, this is obviously a very different show. I’m certainly a fan of action movies and action shows and action books and action stories, but I found myself, after 15 years on Supernatural, which was very much based in family as well, wanting something that anybody of any age could watch. I wanted something that wasn’t just about cutting off vampires’ heads, or killing God or the devil and everything in between, but was more like, “How can we make this as realistic as possible to what’s going on right now, and what has gone on in the past, and what is sure to go on in the future?” The commentary is oftentimes about how people have seen the original and love the re-imagining that we Walker put together. But more often than not, I love that I’ve had parents come up to me and talk about how Walker, though the situation is different because he’s a widower, is going through life and trying to figure out his kids while they’re changing, and he has to go to work because he has a job. There’s something universal about that struggle and that experience that seems to have really communicated and landed with people, no matter what their job is and what their family situation is.

Is it challenging to make this series with a shortened episode count, or does it feel like you can really just pack more into every episode?

PADALECKI: I get both. There’s a quote I heard one time about actors and writers and directors and producers and whatnot, and they used it in the form of an actor. They said, “If you give an actor three years to prepare, it’ll take three years. If you give him three months to prepare, it’ll take three months. If you give him three days, it’ll take three days. If you give him three minutes, it’ll take three minutes.” It’s one of those things where life imitates art. We’ve found such wonderful stuff, and kudos to our great writing team for making it possible, but it feels very like life. It feels very much like Cordell’s life would be. You find out sooner than you would’ve hoped, “Hey, this is coming up,” or “You’ve gotta do this or that.” While it’s certainly been different, if you could give me 30 days to do an episode, it’ll have its challenges. If you give me one day to do an episode, it’ll have its challenges. I think that goes from top to bottom, cast and crew alike. We’ve had a great time. Because of cross-boarding some episodes, we might be doing episodes one and two, and even if a character is only in episode two, since we will shoot two together, I still get to catch up with that human being during the filming, which is wonderful.

You’re kicking off this season with a lot of storylines happening for these characters. He’s stepped up his romance, his daughter is not coping well with things, and there’s a serial killer. I love that there’s really this balance where you have the romance and there are some good things on the horizon for the family, but then there’s also the dark and deadly aspect of a serial killer. What sort of balance will we see this season between the light and the dark? Will we get to a point where things get more dark and more intense, as things play out with The Jackal?

PADALECKI: You certainly will. Given what happened with the strikes, over the last 12 months, it didn’t make sense to do a direct pickup after Season 3. So much time has passed between the end of Season 3 and when Season 4 will air that it just didn’t make a lot of sense for our viewers and our lovely and wonderful loyal watchers. Kale [Culley] just turned 18 in May, and he’s almost my size now. If we picked up Season 4, episode one, directly after Season 3, the final episode, it wouldn’t make sense. You’d be like, “Oh, I guess August grew four inches overnight.” Our writers were very aware of that and tried to make every bit of that as real and human as possible. We certainly do see, as characters and as viewers, how this Jackal that haunted Captain James and Ranger Walker back in the day, five years ago, still has a stranglehold on them, and just how deep and dark they go while trying to keep all the other plates spinning in the other aspects of their lives.

It’s certainly never great to keep secrets from people you care about, especially when they’re big secrets. And on a TV series, those secrets are bound to come out, and likely at the worst possible time.

PADALECKI: Yep, that’s what our sadistic writers try to do. Teasing, teasing, teasing. No, they do it in such a wonderful way. Going back to before even the pilot, one of the things that Anna Fricke and I talked about before we’d even staffed the room and cast the characters and hired the crew was that we want this to be as real as possible. Although in a different arena, with Walker being a Texas Ranger and a widow, we want this to have universal problems and issues that every person goes through on different scales as they navigate this life.

Jensen Ackles directed an episode of the series. Do you think he’ll do that again?

PADALECKI: I sure hope so. Now and always, I will work with Jensen, wherever, whenever. He’s obviously a busy man. He’s got a wife and three kids of his own. He’s here, there, and everywhere. He’s been in Toronto, he’s been in Vancouver, and he’s been in New Mexico. He’s a very busy guy. He and I see each other a lot, obviously, with Supernatural conventions, and we text often. He certainly is up for it. It’s just like life and like Cordell Walker, trying to figure out when things will work out.

Do you see yourself directing an episode?

PADALECKI: Not to speak for Jensen, but to try to speak for Jensen, directing is something that he was always really passionate about, and producing is something that I was always really passionate about. I have a deep respect for directors, and the door is not closed. If the opportunity arises and I think, “Man, I really wanna direct,” then I will. But over 24 years in the industry, I’ve worked with so many talented directors who deserve the episode more than I do. Obviously, as the executive producer and the guy in the poster, I could probably make a phone call and say, “Hey, I want an episode,” and they might say, “Okay, you get one.” That’s not what Jensen did.

From day one, he was like, “Hey, I wanna direct some day.” That’s not where I was. And so, I don’t wanna take an episode away from a really deserving, talented director. I really love my job as an actor and as a storyteller, and as an executive producer, I help guide the storyline and help in the casting and help with the editing. So, I’m a pretty happy cat right now, where I stand. I love that puzzle. The director puts the puzzle pieces together. I like getting the puzzle pieces and figuring out how they can work even better. I think a lot of artists go, “Hey, I wanna guide this.” For me, I love the puzzle of acting and scene breakdown and story breakdown, and just trying to figure out how to make what’s already great on the page and great on the set, even better if I can.

You and Jensen Ackles have both talked about having interest in a possible revival of Supernatural. Is that something you’ve seriously considered doing? Have you had any real conversations about that, or are you just having conversations about having conversations?

PADALECKI: It’s not that I have seriously considered doing it, my single answer is yes. It’s timing. It’s availability. Jensen and I feel so strongly about our show that we had for 15 years together that we don’t wanna just do it just to do it. We don’t wanna go, “Hey, I have two weeks off in June. Let’s go ahead and shoot 10 pages a day, just so we can have some more content.” If and when Supernatural comes back, it’s going to be a labor of love, and we’re gonna put every hour in to make sure that it’s as true to the cannon and to the fandom and to the story and to the characters as possible. So, my short answer is it’s not a consideration, the answer is yes. I just don’t know when I’m available. I don’t know when he’s available. But again, my answer is yes.

Have you thought about all the different possibilities of what it could be, as far as whether you’d do a shortened season, whether you’d want to do a movie, or if none of it works, whether you’d do an animated series?

PADALECKI: Yeah. Honest to God, I don’t think about the medium in which it would air. I think about the story that I care about. If Jensen and I talk about where we would like to see Sam and Dean appear on screens again, and we think, “Cool, we like this, and we like this arc, and we like this conclusion,” then let’s do it. If they make it into a movie, great. If they make it into a limited series, great. If they make it into a flip book that’s available on Amazon, great. But at this point in time, I feel so protective of Supernatural that if the story’s fine, then I don’t care how it gets into the world.

Eric Kripke has also always made it known that he’d love to have you on The Boys anytime you were available. Would you like to make an appearance over there? Have you actually spoken to him about that? Would you even want to be in that world?

PADALECKI: Yeah, he has reached out to me and my response to him 90% of the time is, “Dude, I’m 41 now with three kids. I’m not 25 and working out three hours a day. I know you’re going to fucking make me get naked, so give me a heads up. I’m in, but let me get a nutritionist and a trainer and get in the hyperbaric chamber for eight months before you make me show up.” But yeah, it would obviously be a lot of fun to see Kripke again and to work on that show, which is a great show that I’m a fan of.

It certainly seems like a little wild break of fun.

PADALECKI: A little wild? Have you seen the show?!

Yes, and I love it very much. But I also have a sick sense of humor.

PADALECKI: I do, too. I love watching it, but imagine putting yourself in it. I’ve got kids. My mom and dad are still alive. I’ve got grandparents that are alive. I don’t know how to just unplug their electricity when the show airs.

collider

[carefulfears]

https://www.tumblr.com/waiting-for-the-day/724638324438024192/taking-her-to-the-liberty-bell-after-she

well you have to talk about the way mulder loves now!! it can be very subtle but also so intense (thinking about the way he looks at scully, wants to know what she thinks, when he gives her his undivided attention...)

(x) (xx) well, yes! where scully's love is very contradictory, mulder's is contemplative, i think. he's a lot more aware than people realize. but you have to get it. like you have to get what it all means. blink and you'll miss it.

a superstars of the superbowl VHS tape, an apollo 11 keychain, creepy dolls, whatever the hell was in that christmas present. everything means something. it’s like that incrementum line:

Beside him on the couch, she rips into hers with abandon - Mulder's rare gifts are always puzzling, always a challenge, more of an experience than a thing in itself. They're extensions of him and all of his complexity, like little pieces of his soul.

everything means something, and scully loves to figure it out.

he says “i didn’t know it was your birthday, scully!” with a wrapped gift in his pocket, a sparkler and song in front of her. he says “i stole these from a guy with a broken leg down the hall, he won’t be able to catch me” about flowers we watched him come through the front doors holding, always prepared with a smile and an excuse. (they both really love to adore each other, when they can get away with it).

he notices everything. he remembers everything. he’s interested, he asks questions. have you ever been to san diego? have you ever seen the liberty bell? are you gonna see that guy again? how was the wedding? if you could take out 5 people from beyond the grave, who would they be? if you could be someone else for a day, who would you be?

he can quote her senior thesis verbatim, years after reading it. references it for decades. he always wants her input, values it. it’s that moment in ice when hodge (whose partner says she feels treated like his “assistant”) yells at scully that she’s wrong, and mulder just comes and asks what she found. when they find the parasite, the first thing he does is move away from the microscope and tell scully to look.

there’s an essay in deny all knowledge about this (what do you think? by rhonda wilcox and j.p. williams); in the x-files, love is respect, and respect is curiosity. valuing what someone has to say. to her peers and superiors, she’s “mrs. spooky.” to him, she’ll be head of the bureau someday.

(and always. he tells her not to take on his flagrant plans because he doesn’t want her to jeopardize her career, have a note in her file. he fucks off to alaska alone so that she won’t risk anything. he tells her to “go be a doctor.” seven years in, both of them teary in a motel room, he tells her that there is so much more for her in her life. “there is so much more than this.” she was never just an asset to “his” quest: she’s valuable to anything, whatever she wants, whatever she sets her mind to.)

i’ve talked about this before but i think the biggest misconception when it comes to mulder and love is that nothing comes before the crusade, but the crusade is love. it’s love for samantha, yes, but the only difference between samantha’s experience and scully’s is that scully lived. it’s for samantha. it’s for scully. it’s for everyone who came before and after them both. but by nature of having survived, having returned, having come back: there’s something hallowed and fragile about scully’s spot. he would walk away from all of the rest.

when she’s gone, he signs it all away. standing on a bridge, he would trade everything. when he holds every answer that he has ever sought, he gives it up, for no deeper reason than that scully would be able to see her sister one last time. (scully by missy’s bed, crying that her sister will never know that she’s sorry. mulder whispering “oh, she knows. she knows.” and leaning up from his spot on the floor to hold her. there is no deeper conversation than that, because what matters more than that?)

when he walks into a room that holds everything that’s ever been taken from him, everything that he’s lost, everything that he’s tried to find salvation in: he keeps walking. all that he needs is one vial marked with one name.

it’s ahab and starbuck, it’s a mad captain and a devoted follower, sure: but mostly it’s a cycle. mostly it’s a snake eating its own tail.

he can’t say “no” to her for anything. he’s world’s best baby daddy because she pouted at him (because she believes he could be). complete with presents wrapped in baby paper and going to birthing classes with her and tips he learned watching oprah. bugging her about finding out the sex 😭😭 he’s worse than her mother. (“this isn't about the x-files, scully. it is only about you.“)

she feels that she failed him for the rest of her life, he never stops meeting her with absolution. he barely speaks in ghouli except to say “you have nothing to apologize for” and hug her. the original line in the the truth script, before she says that she felt he would never forgive her, is “i’m so sorry about william. i can’t imagine what you must’ve gone through. i missed you so much.”

(she spent months afraid that he would never forgive her, that she would lose everything, and then the moment comes. and all he can do is hold her, and say “i am so sorry. you have been through so much. i have missed you so much.”)

he can “feel” her thinking. he tells her that he’ll curse god for awhile, so that she can sleep. he does not believe in god. it doesn’t matter, nothing is her burden alone. (“i might not believe in god, but i believe in you. i speak to him through you.”)

he “never saw [her] as a mother” until she spoke of herself that way. when she showed up at his door in her underwear the day they met, he wrapped her up and gave her the bed, sat on the floor. matched her vulnerability. seven years later, when she invited herself into his room, he took her shoes off and slept over the sheets.

he spends his life begging to be believed, but never at the cost of her integrity, or even her peace. when she asks what her ex’s stopped watch means, he tells her “it means whatever you want it to mean.” he tells her to believe only in what’s true, what’s true to her, even when she just wants him to be “pleased.” he tells her that he won’t hold it against her if she wants to go work with someone else (even if it’s someone who’s always degrading him).

he constantly lowers himself beneath her when it’s vulnerable. if she’s standing, he sits. if she’s sitting, he kneels. he looks up to her. (and a woman who salutes her father does not know how to look down to a man, but she has to learn).

he touches her very purposefully. it’s learned, it’s earned, it’s to communicate. a gentle hand on her shoulder to say: it’s not personal, we’re friends. a light touch to her back to say: i’m here, i’ve got you.

he says “dana” so softly and deliberately. “mulder” and “scully” are terms of endearment, it’s their secret language, it’s who she became next to him. but he says “dana” to speak to who she is beneath it all. in their annoyingly austenian email love letters, it’s “dearest dana,” but it has been “dearest dana” since the very first time.

he really really likes her. even before he trusts her, when they first met, he invites her out on his run. he doesn’t go anywhere without checking if she’d like to come too. she’s his best friend. they joke about porn and go out to eat barbecue. he gets so wide-eyed and awe-struck every time she talks about literally anything, just falls dead quiet listening to her. she’s the smartest person in the world.

but the hardest thing for mulder to learn is that it’s okay to come off the cross, that it’s okay to experience something other than punishment. so they maintain so much silence, and that snake eating its tail becomes a cycle of inadvertent denial. the best way that mulder ever loved scully is trading that impossible selflessness for movie nights and popcorn. being able to just be still, to sit with her, to be present. she used to cry every time. eventually, she’s giggling over sushi.

that quote i was on about on twitter earlier? “he had the awkward tenderness of someone who has never been loved and is forced to improvise.” (isabel allende).

that’s mulder. awkward tenderness, improvisation; something that you aren’t familiar with, but never giving up on trying.

[avatarkurukdefender]

Adhd is still adhding so lets talk about A Literal Team Avatar instead of writing it :3

Aang is NOT gonna have a good time. In fact to quote Sans he's in for a BAD TIME

So you know in the Yangchen books how her past lives would frequently possess her body at the absolute WORST TIMES for example, the past life that had really really really bad claustrophobia possessing her when she was in a tight claustrophobic space and making her freak out? Yeah that. You know how none of the avatars after Yangchen never seemed to deal with this? Well I headcanon that the reason why was because Yangchen actively BLOCKED the previous incarnations for pulling that same awful shit with every avatar after her.

So what do you think is gonna happen when Yangchen has been removed from the avatar cycle (and teenified) and is no longer to keep the others from fighting over Aang like a chew toy?

:3

Lets see how badly this can fuck with the poor twelve year old boy

(aka a bunch of random headcanons I came up with for the avatars we only have names and even a few of the nameless ones)

Szeto first of all had BAD sleep paralysis. Like almost every night, hallucination fo something just standing over him (or in some cases full on trying to strangle him) and he cant move or even speak levels of bad. Also had severe hemophobia (fear of blood) and would literally faint at the sight of blood (hehehehe)

Next is Salai who had severe thalassophobia (fear of the ocean/ fear of deep bodies of water) like he would get full on panic attacks every single time he had to cross the ocean. Even worse since I headcanon that he drowned in a a severe storm while sailing on the ocean. And considering the fact that the gaang presumably spends a few weeks on a BOAT on the OCEAN to get from the Northern Water Tribe to General Fong's base...yeah thats gonna be a really bad time for Aang.

Avatar Gun, aka the one that possessed Yangchen to go on a rant about how humanity is selfish and uncaring, how they expect you to pull of a hundred miracles and then get mad you didnt do a hundred and one, yeah...they're gonna be a fun one (also they are nonbinary now because they were never said to be male or female and the wiki used they them pronouns for them so bite me) aside from...that they also absolutely HATED crowds, like avoided them at all costs unless absolutely necessary, otherwise would be sweating and shaking the entire time until they could leave. (Which means Omashu, Ba Sing Se, literally any crowded town or city is gonna be absolute HELL for our favorite little airbender)

Ok now for the ones without names (I have two of those so far)

This armless firebender who someone on tiktok named Avatar Kazza (I dont remember who named her that though)

Oh boy :3

So you know how General Fong pulled Katara under the ground to trigger the avatar state in Aang? Well the same thing happened to her partner. Only difference is that her partner wasn't pulled back out. Oh no. Her partner was pulled underground and CRUSHED to death. (When Kaaza bent them back out, there was nothing but blood, broken pulverized bones and completely crushed organs...) Yeah its gonna be a lot bloodier than in canon (None of General Fong's soldiers will die Im not gonna traumatize Aang THAT badly, but they will be maimed very badly.)

Next is this pretty avatar

I think someone on tiktok named her Avatar Imiq but dont quote me on that

She's the avatar that was absolutely terrified of the Spirit World, to the point that it caused Yangchen's sister Jetsun to get kidnapped by spirits when they went there (because you know the spirits get hostile when you're afraid and guess who decided to pop in at the worst moment?) Luckily this one isnt going to cause too much trouble since I dont think Aang actually goes to the spirit in books two and three unless you count Wan Shi Tong's Library (though Aang is not gonna have a good time when Avatar Imiq starts freaking out because of Wan Shi Tong) but I havent rewatched the show in awhile so I could be wrong

Also you know the avatar that had claustrophobia? That was Wan. With the exception of his tree house Wan absolutely hated small tight spaces. And that is something he was going to make everyone's problem (just like how every avatar inherited Wan's iconic crooked avatar smile, every avatar also inherited some claustrophobia, some worse than others. Unfortunately thats now gonna be Aang's problem)

I just keep coming up with these and thinking "What would suck/be the most inconvenient for Aang to have in this moment" and then assigning that to one of the past lives

(Also here's something funny, you know the air nomad avatar behind Kuruk? They actually used him TWICE in the TLOK image of all the past lives. He's also the second one behind Szeto on the left side)

[dawsonscreekwasalwaysbad]

funniest parts of inside job pt 2

mommy likey drinky

“santa is fake! but student debt is real!” “you had to learn sometime, brayden”

“this is gonna be the most globally damaging midlife crisis since elon musk” oh that is APT

“ok boomer”

“are you poland? because that german guy straight-up owned you”

reagan saying that alex jones “looks like an orangutan fucked a fire hydrant”

“i’m the only one left who will listen to me!”

spending the whole episode confused on why oprah is back and then seeing her yell “i’m not the first oprah!”

“our missions do feel suspiciously like b-stories”

“why is my wallet on a metal leash? where would it be trying to go?”

lights being mothman’s kryptonite is a very obvious joke but it still works every time

KEANU FUCKING REEVES

“MOTHERFUCKER!” “well, he is fucking reagan’s mother, so yes. motherfucker.”

*takes out a lotus* “i don’t put these in my pocket. they grow there spontaneously.”

“i’m feeling drained from staring meaningfully into the distance”

“after dating so many billionaires, his millionaire lifestyle keeps me grounded”

the pussy posse being amazed and confounded by brett’s respect women juice

the real reason leonardo dicaprio only dates women under 25

“someone on the internet found out margot robbie is cgi” FINALLY SOMEONE WHO AGREES WITH ME

reagan accidentally imitating owen wilson

“when i’m done with you, men will look at you the way they look at me: briefly!”

gigi’s reaction to her make-under: “i wanna cyberbully myself!”

tamiko’s reaction to rand turning into a literal manchild: “way to turn subtext into text, rand”

myc’s absolutely SAVAGE comebacks at the constitution heist

“how would the founding fathers feel about this?” “probably the same way your father feels about you”

“ok, give me the word and i’ll blow the hell out of this thing” “said your ex-wife to brett’s dick”

“aliens? a woman being in charge of a team? nobody’s gonna believe this!”

“it’s a psychic union where everyone thinks the same and acts the same like fucking marvel fans” HGFHJGSDHKJHSJGH

“the last time i saw a white guy that generic, he was on a don’t walk sign!”

“fresh dirt is brought to you by blue apron. do you only care about the environment when it’s super convenient?”

INCEL STEVE

“how did he get that hoodie?”

“WE’VE BEEN FUCKED BY THE POPE!” “for the love of god, CONTEXT!”

saying “when in rome” is half the reason people come to rome

the gay dog weddings

“i now pronounce you two very good boys!”

“that’s me in the corner, losing my religion.”

reagan offending the italians (again)

“oh man, if god is real, i’m fucked”

“in the name of the father the son and the HOLY SHIT”

in a vow to make air travel as inconvenient as possible, the third wright brother invented sharing an armrest

“i deserve to be punished. i still quote borat sometimes”

“look! a woman’s ankle!”

*takes one look at hell* “those flamin’ hot cheetos commercials really nailed it.”

“i love cable news. it’s like watching the apocalypse in slow motion.”

gigi describing brett as “the comic sans of people”

andre reminding us how old millennials are now

“destroying your brother’s political legacy. what are you, a bush?”

the ayn rand tattoo

brett accidentally unionizing and legalizing sex work

“the solution just seemed so obvious”

“because faking your own death worked so well last time, reagan. redundant much?”

“maybe all conspiracies are real!” “oh, that’s not good.”

brett’s lil brett puppet

lil brett dying

lil brett going absolutely batshit crazy during the entire end credits of that episode

“you look like a white girl at burning man!”

the coughing and face-touching station

“the only way you’re associated with the number 300 is in pounds.” “you calling me fat?” “explicitly!”

“i literally have no idea what you’re going to say next!” “vagina egg.”

“i feel like we have the same interests. wanna start a podcast?” “no! this is like a siren song for straight white men!”

reagan once used cheetos as croutons

*route 96 turns into route 69* “haha, nice”

the fact that andre is just the original text of the “one fear” meme

“fun for ages six to six and a half!”

berenstain bears originally being berenstein makes SO MUCH SENSE

“and finally the rich white underdogs became the rich white ruling class. an inspirational story”

jr refusing to put his shirt back on

brett gives a tinfoil hat to the shazaam poster and it WORKS

“turns out i wasn’t pregnant, i just had way too much del taco” “i’ve been there”

“you said something nice, but it felt mean!”

mothman’s alternate timeline was a reverse of the fly

andre is canonically into tentacle hentai

lampshading the plot holes

“me? in charge of a whole workforce, like santa?”

“how many oscars is meryl streep supposed to have? three seems kinda low”

andre, just having shoved nixon back into his grave, now covered in blood and holding a shovel: “i don’t wanna talk about it”

air bud!!

“i could beat a dog in chess! probably.” same, brett, same

[bracketsoffear]

Spiders-Man (Marvel) "He’s a collection of sentient spiders that are Peter Parker and took his identity. They are spiders, but they also manage to maintain the role of spiderman, keeping control over New York City, and probably terrorizing more than one person with the fact that they can disassemble themselves and crawl all over people."

Director Lee Harvey Oswald (The Department of Truth) "In The Department of Truth, the protagonist’s boss (and the director of the titular department) is a much older Lee Harvey Oswald, though it’s not explicitly known which version of him he is. As in, what story of the assassination is true? Is he the CIA stooge? The innocent patsy? The lone gunman? Our protagonist muses this question in the second issue and can only conclude: “He’s probably not the one killed by Jack Ruby.” And looking at the picture the comic paints of who he is now, he seems much more the type to spend his time in Howard Hunt’s circles than Kerry Thornley’s, if you know what I mean. He has become the image of the perfect Cold War-era fed with his browline glasses, dark suit, quips about a new generation gone soft, and an ever-present cigarette. And that’s because he always has been that. He joined the Department as an agent when he was 19, working to counter the Soviets and gain information on their country’s equivalent of the D.o.T. And we, the reader, do not know what happened on November day in Dallas, but neither does he, it seems. Kennedy stood against the Department and it was his job to take him out, but in that book depository, he saw the Scarlet Woman (see the Extinction poll) holding a sniper rifle, ready to tear apart the country’s sense of truth with a bullet. (Well, three.) But as the story of the assassination spread, so did the idea of Lee Harvey Oswald, the concept of the shadowy assassin that was seen on the front pages, the conflicting theories and paranoias made manifest. To quote Hawk Harrison (another character), “the living embodiment of every horrible thing people think the government is capable of, filled up into a man-shaped thing.”

And we don’t know which one was saved and which one was killed. And neither does he. He’s left contemplating whether or not he’s truly real or simply another fiction, but at the end of the day, it doesn’t matter. Reality is relative, he’s no less real than this country is. No matter how human he may or may not be, he might as well be American paranoia personified in function. He’s a man desperate to do whatever it takes to uphold the ideal of what America is supposed to be, that Shining City on a Hill; a man fighting in a war of propaganda and information and disinformation, a war of stories and ideas. To quote Indrid Cold, he’s simply a “dream this country is having.”

For a brief moment though, he tried to escape from what he is in the way so many privileged young people of the 1960s did: growing his hair out and running away to San Francisco in search of drugs, free love, and an answer to his problems and existential malaise. He found the first two, the last is debatable. He finds himself in bed with an unnamed woman with whom he shares his fears about his nonexistence, about the country's nonexistence, only to pull a gun on her when he realizes that she laced his blunt with LSD. ‘Who the hell are you, and who do you work for?’ He asks, pointing the weapon in her face. “Do you know who I am?” She simply answers: “You’re not going to hurt me. I’m just a pawn in a bigger game. A patsy.” She knows. Of course, she does, she’s Company, a CIA agent involved with MKULTA, the agency’s infamous failed attempt at brainwashing its own citizens. “Was it you?” he asks, “Did you pull the trigger?” She tells him that they’re not the ones in control, that “Everyone misses the real conspiracy, don’t they? We’re the little shadow puppets they control. We do what they tell us to do. Some very smart, very dumb people thought they could control what America was without getting blood on their hands. They thought they were storytellers. They thought they were selling Coca-Cola and Chevrolet and hot dogs. They wanted to tell America that “It’s a Wonderful Life,” and they wanted America to believe it. Isn’t that right, Lee? But it’s not a wonderful life. People know that. People don’t want to get along. They want to fuck and feel good and feel righteous. The Department of Truth is selling America its own version of The Truth. Telling everyone Why We Fight. Why We Buy. Why We Believe. But it’s not working, is it? You know it’s not working. You can see the cracks forming all around us. You can see the fracturing. The Counterculture… It’s such a perfect little weapon. These kids think they’re fighting against some big war in Asia, but they’re on the front lines right here in Haight-Ashbury. They eat the lotus flower and they see themselves as little gods, and see their desires as something larger than they are. They sing their little protest songs, but they’ll be voting Republican before their first grays come in. I’m just a pawn. A patsy. I feed the kids the drugs and my bosses tell me that it’s to wash their minds, to see if we can push them, control who they are and what they think. It’s not working… This whole MKULTRA thing… Not how the men in suits want it to work, but me and the kids on the ground, we’ve been seeing it. They do it all on their own. They brainwash themselves. They become rancid, and bloodthirsty, and we have to feed them the blood they want.” “I don’t understand,” asks Lee. “Who killed Kennedy?” “You’re so fucked up that you can’t even how funny that is…” she continues, “Is it my bosses in Langley? Eisenhower’s military-industrial complex? The big bad commie-hating war machine, not willing to back down in the fight against the hammer and sickle, even if means having to kill our best and brightest? Is it Queen J. Edgar Hoover and his black-suited goon squad terrified that the kids are going to rise up and shoot their parents in their sleep? Is it the Italian mob, and Hoffa, and all their mobsters and teamsters angry that they’re losing their foothold,” No, she says. “It’s the same as it was in ‘63. It wasn’t any of them. It was you. It was me. It was all those kids smoking reefer on the street and thinking about free love. You can’t just tell them that things are going to be better forever like your idiot bosses thought. The kids want to fight for themselves. They want to own it for themselves. You need to let them taste glory.”

Lee wakes up with a campaign button in his hand: “NIXON’S THE ONE!” The next time we see him, he’s meeting the new president in the oval office, once again wearing a suit with his hair cut short. He has become almost exactly what the unnamed agent described, with one major difference. He succeeds.

History is, of course, written by the victors, and facts can be rewritten by them as well. After his “death”, the previous Director (Frank Capra, director of It’s a Wonderful Life) put him in the Department’s archives to try and figure out who the Scarlet Woman was, only for him to use the research to find a new way of doing things, a way to shift reality through manipulating what people believe to be true on a large scale through media, and symbolic imagery, and simple lies that serve to reinforce what the public wants to believe about this country, and for that, Richard Nixon appointed him to the job we know him in, Director of the D.o.T. Director Capra was a naïve idealist who truly believed that the American Dream was not only real but could be achieved through hard work. Lee knows that the American Dream is a lie, but my god, he will do what it takes to make it real, no matter how underhanded the tactics. If you can control the narrative, you can control the Truth.

For most of his tenure, it was the height of the Cold War, there was a distinct enemy to push against. It was a conflict of countries, of ideologies, of two superpowers trying to keep their way of life at the expense of the other, and it was the U.S. that won out. There is another version of the 20th century, the one that was once real, where the founding ideals of the USSR were much closer to being realized within its border, it was something better than what it became, but the U.S. won the propaganda war and what was once simply a fact had become a hazy fiction that never happened. And so the victor rewrites history. And how does one become the victor? Through whatever means necessary, from fabricating events that later became real, to assassinations, to media manipulation, to the creation of the Satanic Panic itself, playing off paranoia and Christian nationalism to strengthen the idea that America is something that exists, that the American Dream is worth fighting for. (And of course, in the case of the latter, to deflect media attention from the whole Iran-Contra Deal.)

And what did this victory get him? A hell of a lot of guilt and a shattered, post-truth society that he’s left trying to clean up the pieces of. The Department is no longer fighting an ideological battle against an equally matched enemy, they’re floundering against the misinformation and conspiracies they once spread, desperately trying to keep reality from falling into the hands of far-right reactionaries using their own methods (and in Lee’s case, his own stories) to try and rewrite reality in their favor. The D.o.T. is rotten to its core, an organization founded to uphold American hegemony, but now, they’re the closest thing to the heroes of this story simply because the other side is so, so much worse. Like Pandora desperately trying to stuff the evils she released back into the box, they’re trying to contain the lies they wrought upon society.

The phrase “post-truth society” is often thrown around concerning the present political moment, but the comic posits that this isn’t new. There has never been a unified societal truth. But it sure as hell is worse now when any internet fascist can go and rant about whatever fucking bigoted conspiracy they stake their brand on and sway thousands to their side. And we need to fight that at all costs. But preserving the status quo is not the way; I mean, look where attempting to do that left us. No, there’s another way. And that’s coming clean about everything. No more secrets, no more attempts to shape the narrative towards your ideal, the public needs to know. (And that’s the power of government transparency and the Fourth Estate, babey!)

Finally, I leave you with this monologue: “I know you don’t trust me. I don’t care. I’ve done enough bad shit, and spent the last sixty years of my life lying through my teeth every goddamn day. I don’t need you to trust me. But I need to trust you to know that the ends justify the means. You’re sour over your star-faced man. Hawk told you that he stoked the fire there, tried to make it seem realer than it was. That we had a vested interest in people believing that Satan was lurking behind every corner. I was younger then. I was stepping boldly. I was trying to defend the dream of what America was supposed to be. Not let those Russian fucks dictate our future. I’ve done many things that haunt me, more than you can imagine.”

[desire-mona]

randomly assigning house md characters internet moments / videos / memories / whatever i remember based off nothing at all (i did i dps version too) (also links for everything i talk about will be provided) (also also this isnt made to make fun of anyone involved in any of this)

house - mr beast and his OLD OLD youtube videos, like circa 2015? i think? he used to make cringe compilations essentially where he just made fun of kids' youtube intros. face and all like nothing was blurred for privacy, and then he'd call them cringe and make drinking bleach jokes. like a LOT. i binge watched those back in like 4th grade i think? maybe 5th? so thats kinda all i associate him with now. he also made videos where he would say a word like a thousand times, sometimes WAY more (like 100k+). or like. count to that number, he did both. anyway rip house you wouldve loved making fun of kids' youtube videos

wilson - does anyone remember the evian baby commercials? i think the whole shtick was like "this water makes you feel young again" I THINK? the one i linked was the one where the reflection on a building makes ppl babies, but theres one where babies are on roller skates or whatever too. this isnt entirely an internet moment as much as it is just a memory, cuz i remember my mom and my aunt DYING laughing at these commercials. idk what it was they were just in tears. theres something so 2007-2015 about dancing babies. wasnt a dancing baby the first internet meme? just googled it and yes it was.

cuddy - onision's shitty spoken word songs PLEASE tell me someone remembers them. onision really shouldve stopped trying to make music after the banana song bc the rest really suck shit. this is NOT based on vibes i gotta get that out there, i was like hmm cuddy has a kid. you know who else has a kid? YOU KNOW WHO LET THEIR KID FALL OUT OF A WINDOW? cuddy would fucking HATE onision. ALSO OH MY GOD PAUSE EVERYTHING ONISION JUST UPLOADED A SONG. I NEED TO MAKE A SEPERATE POST ABOUT THIS RIGHT NOW WHAT THE HELL. anyway dont watch it. i linked strange æon's video on his music just bc i really dont wanna direct u to anything of his directly. did u know i dont like onision?

foreman - the most insane youtube poop ive ever seen in all of my 19 years of living, i sent this to maddie specifically when i made my initial "like for a rando internet moment!" post but i really need to share it with the general public. general warning for youtube poop-ness; flash, loud noises, overwhelming, etc. i am actually begging you to watch this because it tops every other ytp ive ever seen, like actually blows it out of the water. i also has no idea ppl still made ytps after 2014 tbh.... btw this is probably the only ytp that i'll ever recommend LMAO

chase - OH MY GOD KYLERLOVESJESUS. so basically this one eboy influencer type on tiktok back in 2019 Found God and went on rants about how abortion is wrong and gay marriage is bad and blah blah blah. there was this moment on one of his lives where he went "i love gay people, i would be best friends with a gay person. do i support it? no." which was the FUNNIEST shit back in the day. i would quote it on the daily. btw the editing of the video i linked is VERY of the time so beware LMAO

cameron - cutie the kitten (sans' wife and gf) + the killing videos sans fan girls would make. i actually cant link anything bc the channel doesnt exist anymore but! basically back in 2016ish there was this one girl who had such a crush on sans and she had a whole ocxcanon situation with sans and her pink cat oc Cutie. a lot of ppl hated her + the ppl who had ocs shipped with sans but looking back its truly not a big deal. what is a big deal is that she (? maybe?) and other sans fangirls would make animated slideshow videos of their ocs using powers or whatever to kill other sans fangirls. like brutally. it was a wild time i wish cutie's channel was still up so i could prove thats a real thing, but ask an undertale fan from back then and odds are theyll know. heres a sans fangirl cringe compilation so you kinda know what im talking about, but fair warning it is a cringe compilation so. it wont be nice.

thirteen - TW INCEST!! this one hamilton animatic i saw back in forever ago to the song 'helpless'. usually animatics to that song use eliza and hamilton (im not a hamilton fan this is very surface lvl knowledge btw) but the one i saw was eliza and ANGELICA. like as in HER SISTER. big surprise someone in a big fandom ships incest wow I KNOW its tame compared to other shit, but it was i think my first exposure to anything like that circa 2017ish, so it kinda stuck in the brain. also the video i linked isnt the og its a phil collins mashup, the og got taken down. hamilton always makes an appearance in my house posts doesnt it, be lucky i didnt give kutner this one bc ppl were turn up abt hamilton fan kutner.

taub - WHAT DO YALL KNOW ABOUT MIKE AND MELISSA ⁉️⁉️ basically mike and melissa is this animated passion project this guy made to show himself (or his persona? or maybe just some guy) falling in love with his fursona that comes to life. this was the only episode this guy uploaded and i think he kinda disappeared after. the plot is kinda hard to follow and its not TERRIBLY animated but its certainly not professional looking. there's a video about what happened to him uploaded like 5 months ago, but i havent watched it. when i first heard of mike n melissa i fully thought it was a mid 2000s family sitcom but it definitely Is Not That.

kutner - undertale sans au christmas party comic dub. i probably dont need to give an explanation as to what sans aus are but idk how many ex or current undertale fans follow me so i'll do it anyway. making au's for undertale was a pretty common practice back in its early days, and usually the most popular character in any undertale variation is sans. who sans is shipped with was always up in the air, so much like the onceler, ppl ended up shipping sans with other au versions of himself. this christmas party comic is in my mind the undertale fandom equivalent of camp weehawken. i think there was also a sans au comic where all the sans' except for like 2 were toddlers at daycare? i dont remember who the adult sans' were but also i think the creator got into hot water? dont remember why.

[dimonds456]

Undertale is 8 years old today, and Papyrus is still one of my favorite fictional characters of all time, and definitely the one that's still the most important to me. Thank you, Toby Fox, for everything.

Time to get sentimental.

I was in middle school when Undertale came out. I wasn't there for the release, but I was there before the new year, around November.

At the time, I was in the worst mental state I have ever been in. I was deep, deep in the depths of depression, and no one in my family believed me when I told them that, since I had always been the "dramatic child". Attention-seeking. My brother was still very young at the time, too, so y'know.

To put it bluntly, my life was in danger from my own mind. Without saying the word, you can probably guess what I mean. I was alone, when I tried to reach out for help I was either denied or made fun of, and I was getting increasingly worse.

Then Undertale came into my life.

I loved it instantly, watching Jack play through the game and then quickly convincing my parents to buy it for me once I got to the end of his pacifist route. And playing it myself took weeks, since I wasn't good at games and the bullet hell format was torture, but finally making it to the end and getting to hug Asriel for myself marked a change in my life's trajectory.

See, I did not have the courage to play through the genocide route on my own, instead watching Lets Plays and YouTubers React compilations. I remember latching onto Flowey and Chara immediately (and I was in the camp of thinking Chara was good until the fandom made me second-guess myself, unfortunately). I remember getting upset at Undyne's death and feeling awful at Sans'. And I knew what the game was trying to tell me, I picked up on the themes of love and mercy.

But that's not the part that stood out the most to me. That, instead, goes to Papyrus' death in the genocide route.

"W-WELL, THAT'S NOT WHAT I WAS EXPECTING. ST... STILL, I BELIEVE YOU CAN DO A LITTLE BETTER, EVEN IF YOU DON'T THINK SO. I... I PROMISE."

This single quote saved my life. I say that without exaggeration.

Whenever I was struggling in school, I'd ask myself what Papyrus would tell me if he were there. And then he'd comfort me. Lift me up. Encourage me. Told me I wasn't the terrible person I thought I was, and even if I was that person, I had the potential and capability of change. I could do better. BE better. Help others do better.

So I did. I used that energy to pull myself out of my depression (by myself, btw. no one came to help me except one (1) teacher, who finally convinced my parents something was wrong with me, and even then they didn't really do much to help so). I put forth a persona of kindness, one that I embodied more and more as the months and eventually years went on.

To this day, I still try to be like Papyrus.

He's not perfect, far from it, but he also acknowledges his flaws while lifting himself and others up despite them. He loves himself, and uses that self-love to help other people, which is something I still desperately want to embody.

Papyrus' encouragement was the one thing I had to cling to when I was deep underwater, and he brought me up high enough that I could start swimming on my own again.

Was it silly? Yeah. Was it cringy? Maybe at the time. Do I regret it? Hell no.

When I fell, Paps was there to catch me, even if it was just from my own imagination. But if he could help me out that much simply by existing and leading by example, then goddamnit, there's hope. Hope I cling to every day.

Thank you, Papyrus. I owe you my life.

Thank you, Toby Fox, for creating Undertale in general. The whole game helped me out to many, many extensions (like telling me lesbians and trans people exist lol), but I can't emphesize enough just how much it's helped others, too. Just how sincere the game is. Hopeful. I look at Undertale today and I see a better future. Thank you.

And thanks for reading. Surely this isn't the first story you've heard like this, as Undertale is just one of those games that touched a lot of people, so I appreciate you giving it the read. Undertale means a lot to me, and it always will.

We can all do a little better, even if we don't think so. I promise.

[pup-pee]

*presents u my dick grayson hcs like ur @ my garage sale* (dick hcs #1?)

♡ this

♡ hes a passenger princess(no this is cannon whoopsie)

♡ dick is like the first girl 2 b killed in a slaughter movie, but just as a 27-ish yr old adult man

♡ draws on a beauty mark in a different spot everytime & gaslights any1 who asks about it -"hey wasnt ur beauty mark under ur other eye?" -"idk i cant see my own face"

♡ hes always losing his hairties bc he keeps shooting them @ ppl -& rubberbands 4 that matter

♡ we dont talk about the skin grip example -it involves a lot of falling & a lot of crashing -if ykyk

♡ dick usually has a twix in his pocket, but in order 2 get it u have 2 guess if its a left or right twix -he also respectfully keeps the left twin in his left pocket & the right twix in the right pocket

♡ he never believed in santa claus but is terrified that watermelon will grow inside him if he swallows the seeds

♡ not rlly a hc but hes vry mcdonals girl toy coded

♡ says "fuck it we ball" b4 jumping in2 a drug ring

♡ the hardest hes laughed in a while was @ a bucket falling over

♡ "masculine but in a peacock way" quotes,,,,,

♡ makes hot chocolate in a pot -refuses 2 make it in a mug it HAS 2 b done on the stove or its not the same

♡ knows how to do his make-up but doesnt know the name of the product he uses -foundation? no thats just my face paint

♡ if u ask him 2 draw, hell say "i cant even draw a straight line!"

♡ dick; *pulls out sticker sheet* *puts mlp sticker some1s face*

♡ swallowed grapes/blue berries whole as a kid bc he didnt know better -didnt chew them*

♡ dicks fav turtle is leo

♡ fixates on tinkering w/his bits & bots

♡ wears crocs -"y do u wear crocs?" -dick; kicks in their direction so the croc hits theyre face

♡ eyeballs measurements(like cooking) -until it comes 2 clothes, then its ultra mega super duper whopper popper deluxe edition focus

♡ h8s grippy socks -the textures weird + attracts halys hair(as if all socks wouldnt but-) -prolly h8s socks in gen

♡ had 2 have snorted pixie stick as a kid -i am such a believer that every kid has done this so he will 2 -as a dare @ LEAST

♡ when hes angry he plops 1 of those sweet cough drops in his mouth 2 chew on just so that he doesnt go off -any hard candy works 2 -he needs 1 of those chewie chewables

♡ biting/chewing hcs bc it needs a separate category @ this point -keeps chewing on earbuds -h8s biting his nails actually -no pen or pencil or eraser is safe -loves biting but h8s when his food is 2 chewy/has 2 bite harder than usual -has more than 1nce caught himself about 2 chew on electrical wire -bites ppl he loves 2 show appreciation/love nom -(i will defend this goddamn hc till the day i die)

♡ pizza bagels -if ur confused, come see me after class

♡ titans have basically banned horror movies from movie nights bc dick would complain about the gore/physics/traps/mo/literally anything 'inaccurate' -"dick its just a movie" "U DONT UNDERSTAND."

♡ has the most social media followers out of batfam but only posts 1nce a month(sometimes not) -its just a picture of his half eaten cereal captioned "beautiful day today"

♡ titians walked in on him doing a backbend & thought some1 murdered him(not 4 vry long though cause oviously he was alive i just like the thought of some1 like roy when he 1st joined the team walking in & doing the most dramatic gasp ever)

♡ listen, i like contortionist dick -its fun & silly

♡ takes 'cringe' as a compliment

♡ "ur mature 4 ur age!" dick; "let me fix that real quick"

♡ hair grows vry quickly

♡ h8s functioning labels(i mean we all should but yk)

♡ skilled in bingo

♡ over buys treats 4 haly -& toys

♡ insane internal clock -kinda ties in; tells ppl specific times -"meet me @ 2;37 pm" as an example

♡ comic sans enjoyer(literally stole from ttg but shhhhhh)

♡ more invested in presidential gay love affairs than WW1 or 2

♡ hes about yay high

♡ hyperfixates on languages istg

i literally could go on 4ever bc my brain is that highway in germany but i wont i regret nothing

pt 2 <- if i make 1 lol

[ghastlybin]

HI HI HI PLEASE IF YOU STILL WRITE FOR ATZ I NEED A YEOSANG FALLEN ANGEL AU WHERE HE’S THE READERS GUARDIAN DEMON OR WHATEVER THE OPPOSITE OF THE GUARDIAN ANGEL IS AND HE ENDS UP FALLING IN LOVE WITH THE READER ~ overexcited atiny anon 🙈

I love how everything was all caps except “overexcited atiny anon” LMAO as always, thank you so much for the request :,) I love Yeosang sm and this also took a long time to WRITE SO thank you for being patient and sooooo sorry for being hella late on this ily <33333

Pairing: Fallen angel/“Guardian” Demon! Yeosang x (GN) Reader

Feat: Guardian angel! Wooyoung, (domestic) demon! San, Reaper! Seonghwa, Souls Keeper! Hongjoong, (domestic) Angel! Jongho, bestie! yunho, & other bestie! Mingi

Word count: 13,028 (estimated)

Genre/contents: Demon/Angel! AU, Angst, maybe *some* fluff but don’t quote me, past criminal! Reader AU also lol

!!!!TW: Lotta blasphemy, Lotta cuss words/ mature language, blood, anxiety/fear, nightmare, guns, knives, weapons, near death, hospital mentions, revenge, familial/loved one loss mention, *kinda* gang mention?, past criminal history, youredefgoingtohelllmao, murder, unresolved trauma, kidnapping, poorly written fight scenes, death mention but it’s only brief, angsty overall lmao

Note: Not much to say other than I have no creativity with original names so the main antagonist is just “your enemy” etc. lmao. Also I love Yeosang so THANK YOU for requesting him but also please never fcking tell him about this long ass fic lmao before I get on with the fic, also know that I *tried* with the whole romantic sub-plot, fluffy cute shit but if you know me you know I suck at those 🥹🤟 I also do not know how to end a fcking sentence or stORY and I have thoroughly pissed myself for making this long bc editing is hell, it is 3 AM as of rn its fine if this flops I will cry (jk jk) If you read this, I love you. if you don’t, I still love you. also beware it’s a bit dialogue heavy. Goodnight.

btw Yeosang in this fic is halazia era Yeosang but this was the only gif I found that he wasn’t smiling in which definitely isn’t matching the theme I had in mind lmfao

There was the belief that everyone had their own guardian angel watching over them. Some people believed in it fully, others merely acknowledged it, and the rest dismissed the idea.

Those who believed it often had guidance and lived fulfilling lives.

Those who merely acknowledged it went on to lead normal lives, whether they were fulfilled or lived terrible lives, it was considered normal.

Those who dismissed it led arguably worse lives than the normal route.

But no one talked about the demons.

The ones who raise anxiety within you when something around you was wrong. The ones who send waves of depression that in turn, make you cancel the plans that would turn out disastrous due to some form of danger.

They were the ones that took the guidance you were given and manipulate it somehow to keep you alive, even if a bit reckless at times.

No one ever acknowledged that maybe demons could be helpful.

Demons were aggressive, but they sure did get the job done.

Yeosang never wanted to be a demon. He trained and abided by the rules, well on his way to becoming a guardian angel for whichever soul he was assigned to.

He was the top-ranked angel, even.

All it took was one mistake.

“Yeosang. You’re up.”

Yeosang always did as he was told. He passed every test, treated everyone with respect, he did everything. He thought it was bullshit that one mistake suddenly demoted him to a demon.

Bullshit.

He could think that now. He wasn’t an angel anymore, though he still acted like one. He wouldn’t be someone’s guardian angel either. Not anymore.

“This is bullshit,” Yeosang spoke out loud this time as the head demon showed an ounce of surprise at Yeosang’s language.

“Ha! That was fast. Looks like I just lost a bet.”

Yeosang frowned. He still couldn’t believe his surroundings. Everything smelled like blood and gore and that was how it smelled before he was even let into the title fair.

“Seriously though, you’re holding up the line, fallen angel. Go to table eight.”

Yeosang forced himself to walk forward and into the gross, humid area where every demon was assigned a title, or in angel terms, your soul's commitment.

The real difference, other than being surrounded by demons who had immortal sins attached to them, was the fact that demons weren’t called upon individually onto a gorgeous stage in front of thousands of other demons, proud to be promoted as a God or Goddess, Soul Keeper, Guardian Angel.

No. Down here, it was Demons, Reapers…

“Kang Yeosang?”

“Yes.”

“You’re listed as a Guardian Demon.”

Yeosang began to laugh, causing the man at the table to give him a strange look.

“That’s not a real soul's commitment!”

“What the hell is a soul's commitment?” The man heavily sighed, leaning back in his chair. Yeosang still grabbed the name tag with his name and title on it, but still found it laughable.

“Wait! You already have a human soul bound to you.” The man called out before Yeosang had gotten a considerable distance away.

“What? Like a soulmate?”

“Is there a problem?” A guard came up to them. The man at table eight was now standing as well.

“Nope. I have this under control.”

Yeosang rolled his eyes, “I’m not supposed to be here. I’m a damn angel!”

“Alright, wait in the back of the line again and come back when you have an attitude fix” the guard roughly put a hand on Yeosang’s shoulder. Yeosang didn’t budge but he did flinch.

“Hey, that’s not necessary! I will handle him.” The man at table eight walked around the table and tried to get in between the two as much as he could. “He’s just in denial. They usually are.”

The guard scoffed, “I don’t have time for this. Next time he causes trouble, I’m sending him to the boss. You too, San.”

“You too, San,” Yeosang mumbled under his breath mockingly as the guard walked away. San slapped Yeosang’s arm, shaking his head.

“I don’t usually do that for anyone. You better be grateful.” San went back behind his table and gave Yeosang a small, rusted box that was way heavier than it looked.

“Doesn’t seem like it, but that contains any and everything you need to know about your human.” San sighed, “every memory, every fear, every-“

“Every happy moment?”

San shook his head, letting it slide that Yeosang had interrupted him.

“No. That’s in the angel department.”

Yeosang had already exhausted his explanation, I am an angel. He wasn’t about to reaffirm that to a demon.

“If I have any questions, is this where I find you?”

San scratched the back of his neck, followed by another head shake. “I’m just a volunteer today.”

“Volunteer?”

“Anyone who sins has to volunteer or they are sent off to any punishment of the boss’ choosing.” San sat back down in his seat, “I hear no punished demon has ever come back the same.”

Yeosang shifted the box to his other arm to be sure it wouldn’t fall. All while maintaining a curious gaze toward San, “So it can get worse here. What did you do?”

“I set one fire that just so happened to turn into one giant one- Which is not my fault! I’m not the one that stored kerosene in a shed built with rotted wood… Amateurs.” San looked around the place, waiting for another demon to come up to his table.

“It was so fucking cool though.”

Yeosang furrowed his eyebrows, “Sure. Where do I go?”

“Don’t know. Not my department. Just find a cozy spot and open the box, I guess. Get to know your human that may or may not end up here in less than a century.”

Yeosang walked off, having exhausted any questions he currently had. That wasn’t to say he wouldn’t have any later.

Y/N.

Yeosang read your name and looked into every detail of your life that he had access to. All the while he had found a spot in the corner between a wall and a trashcan that somehow had a slightly less atrocious smell than the entire realm.

He knew your fears, worries, guilts, sins, and pretty much anything that an angel wouldn’t have access to if they were promoted guardian angels.

The rusted box became less heavy as he absorbed more information regarding you.

Yeosang was actually fascinated by you and all he knew were considered the ‘ugly’ parts of you.

And somehow he did not find anything ugly at all.

His entire career as an angel, he was taught what makes a person a good person.

The more that he had learned about you only left an itching in his brain that wouldn’t go away.

How does any of this make a person bad?

Why was this information only demons had access to?

Yeosang closed the empty box after every bit of information had been collected and ingrained in his mind. He had no use for the box but figured he should hold onto it anyway.

He let out a disappointed sigh and looked up at the red sky above him.

Maybe I don’t need your forgiveness.

The past month swirled in his mind. Memories of his rise and fall as an angel created a bittersweet feeling in his chest that even he wouldn’t be able to describe.

I know I didn’t deserve to be easily replaced.

But those thoughts were just thoughts and Yeosang knew they wouldn’t change anything.

The land of the living.

Where everyone had to pay just to live. Everyone had to work and to no avail. Most lived from paycheck to paycheck that just ended up in the hands of the rich again and then it was back to work with no time at all for themselves.

Hell, even semi-immortal, you had to work every day. But not like this.

Yeosang had never been on earth before today. Only caught glimpses during training, but this is earth?

This had to be hell.

Yeosang looked for you. He knew your location. He knew your face, name, age, and even your height.

But he did not know your exact location. Just the town and building where your workplace was.

“Oh, what the hell.” Yeosang mumbled, his shoulders drooping upon seeing just how many people were in the building. Finding you would prove to be difficult.

On his first day on the job and he was already tempted to break the rule of never showing a human your face.

That was a common Angel rule. Demons, well, they had no rules, technically. As long as you aren’t setting fires and causing mass casualties, that is.

Yeosang was an Angel. He was a perfect angel. At least he used to be.

“Yeosang?”

Until Wooyoung got into trouble.

“Speak of the devil and he appears,” Yeosang muttered, pivoting to face his friend.

“Devil? Pssh, you mean certified Guardian Angel?” Wooyoung grinned. Yeosang saw the halo and the very faint wings that only Wooyoung had.

Yeosang felt his heart sink. Jealousy, anger, grief, and even pride, all jumbled in the same pot that contained his emotions.

“Oh.”

Yeosang didn’t mean to hint at his disappointment. After all, it wasn’t toward Wooyoung. It’s not like Wooyoung forced Yeosang to save him from being denounced and outcasted.

Wooyoung didn’t send Yeosang to eternal hellfire, unforgiven, and all of his hard work amounted to nothing.

What was originally Wooyoung’s mistake, turned into Yeosang’s. Yeosang, who would- and did save his friend from the wrath of the gods and goddesses.

“I never got to tell you how sorry I am.” Wooyoung had immediately changed in demeanor, his grin was now a slight, sorrowful frown. “You deserve this halo more than I do.”

“Don’t. There’s no use in being sorry… Being a demon isn’t so bad.” Yeosang forced a smile, even though he was lying. Wooyoung knew he was lying.

“I know it’s killing you inside.”

“You were assigned to a human in here too, right?” Yeosang dodged the subject further. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to talk about it.

He did, but how to approach it? What to say? Would it make a difference?

“Yes. They are named Y/N.”

Yeosang froze, looking at Wooyoung in disbelief.

“My human's name is Y/N.”

Now Wooyoung was in disbelief. No one had told them that a single human would be assigned two vastly different guardians.

Amidst the crowd of people, their gaze had gravitated toward you, watching as you appeared to be quickly walking out of the building.

While Wooyoung saw your actions as you just trying to get home after a long day, Yeosang sensed the danger.

He had an immediate tunnel vision developed for you as well as the strange yet dangerous person who had been following you.

“Do me a favor and let me handle Y/N by myself.”

Then Yeosang left the building and followed the person that was following you.

You knew what you were doing when you pissed off the wrong person. Them being the wrong person only dared you to piss them off more.

All you did was minor. Setting a car on fire, cutting the brakes to their secondary vehicle, and causing a minor injury to this person that was after you, all were minor actions compared to what they did to you.

You knew they were following you, trying to get you alone. They’ve been attempting to ever since their discharge from the hospital.

They were powerful but you were smart.

You rounded a corner and immediately hid. The only problem was, this person wasn’t following you anymore. And judging by the tone they carried in their voice, it seemed someone had stopped them.

“What do you want? Get out of my way.”

You took this time to leave the area completely, now that they were distracted.

Yeosang felt you had left by the feeling of you pulling apart from him. He knew he couldn’t go a certain distance from you, that was just an unspoken rule.

However, he was not prepared for how excruciating it felt.

Yeosang fell to the ground in the most unbearable pain he had ever felt while the person, whom he had revealed to be a wanted serial killer and gang leader, had walked passed Yeosang and in your pursuit.

Yeosang reached his hand up to grab this man’s leg in an attempt to stop him but was instead met with even more excruciating pain from the memories absorbed.

He saw you and this dangerous man’s connection to each other. The man that caused you so much pain.

He murdered almost everyone you loved over a disagreement you had.

You were once a part of a team with that man. A partner in crime, only, you’ve both hated each other from the get-go.

Yeosang felt your emotions, your anger, your grief, but most of all, he felt your unwavering need for revenge.

Yeosang had regained his bearings, the pain eventually subsiding as he was met with the familiar scent of blood, rotting meat, and something he couldn’t attach an existing smell to.

“You’re welcome.”

San.

He must have spotted Yeosang and decided to check on him. Or maybe San brought him back from the land of the living.

“What?” Yeosang hadn’t meant that as a question but more as a statement. San smiled widely, picking Yeosang up off the ground.

“You’re welcome for saving you from having your soul ripped out.” San further explained. Yeosang was still very much confused.

“That’s what happened?”

“Yep. Go too far from your soulmate and not only do you possibly die, but they will eventually die an early death too.” San put his hand on Yeosang’s shoulder and led him towards a seating area as they trudged through a patch of mud and fresh blood.

“They aren’t my soulmate, that’s-“ Yeosang stopped himself and took a deep breath before continuing.

“What about their guardian angel?” Yeosang asked. He wondered if Wooyoung felt the same pain. Thinking about it made Yeosang feel guilty for telling him to stay away from you.

“Guardian Angel? Only humans who are on the borderline of redemption and damnation have a Demon and an Angel.” San sat down on a crate made out of human bones and motioned for Yeosang to sit on a similar crate as well.

“San,” Yeosang groaned, putting his head in his hands upon sitting down. “What does that even mean?”

San sighed in response, but further elaborated, “Y/N, a criminal, has one more screw-up with the law before they are either sent to your old Angel realm or to your current Demon realm where you will both be together, forever.”

San looked around the barren wasteland of fresh and old blood, mud, human bones, and even the occasional demon remains.

“It’s up to you and the Angel. If you succeed, you’ll have a better chance of getting them into redemption. If the Angel succeeds, well, Y/N is coming down here in our humble abode.” San pulled out a canteen full of whatever drink only San knew.

“Crazy how that works. Huh?”

You locked every available lock to your hotel room and even covered the bottom of the door with an extra sheet to avoid anyone from trying to pick the lock.

Nothing scared you, yet you were on edge. You weren’t ready to die, not without revenge.

But you weren’t afraid of dying either.

You received a call, forgetting to turn off your phone, only to see it was just Yunho.

“You can’t just call! What if someone tracks you?!” You spared any form of greeting and went straight into scolding him.

Yunho was silent for a few seconds after you ended your sentence.

“Well, hello to you too. Anyway, I wanted to tell you that they are moving into phase two.”

“What the hell is phase two?”

“Killing you. Y/N. They are planning to kill you.”

Yeosang listened from the corner of the room, invisible to you at the moment, but if you were to take a picture of him, he’d appear.

There were other ways he could make himself visible, even. But he chose to let it play out, observing until something was about to happen.

“Let them try.”

“Y/N, You need to leave town. As your current only friend, I beg you.”

“Goodbye, Yunho. Use a burner next time.”

You hung up before he could protest. You had a plan and you weren’t about to stop it in its tracks before it could start. Not even for Yunho, as much as you hated to worry him.

Yeosang sensed danger again. Only this time, it was impending. A danger that would come in a few hours. When you had gotten ready to sleep, Yeosang dreaded having to use his demonic abilities.

It was the only way, though. He wasn’t an angel anymore, sure, but he didn’t like being a demon.

“I am so sorry.” He mumbled. He touched your head with his fingertips and conjured the worst nightmare he could send as a warning about the impending danger.

Yeosang stood back, grimacing as you began to tremble and squirm, your breathing was out of your control and you had even begun to mumble fast.

“I am so sorry,” Yeosang repeated, looking away from you to avoid the guilt he felt. “But you should’ve listened to Yunho.”

Your heart thudded against your chest, your vision blurry as bile rose in your throat. You were running and whatever- Whomever- was chasing you would be an arm's length from catching you.

You were terrified. The earth beneath you felt like jello that would trip you at any given moment. You tried running faster, jumping, and even flying just to get away.

But to no avail, you were not fast enough.

You screamed as loud as you could, your voice catching in your throat as you slapped a hand against your chest.

You were in the hotel room. The sun had begun to rise, shining through the curtains. You actually slept the entire night for once.

Yeosang couldn’t bring himself to make eye contact with you, despite you not being able to see him.

You had a nightmare, the first since, well… Since you lost almost all of the people you loved.

You knew it was because of your criminal past. You weren’t sure it was even in the past just yet, but the point is, you knew the dangers.

It was just your subconscious telling you to stay away, trying to instill a fear that would burrow itself inside of you until it’s deeply rooted in your mind to stop trying to get justice for your lost loved ones.

“I just have to push through it.” You whispered to yourself. After all, it was only a nightmare.

If you had a vision instead, well, you still would’ve had your mind set on revenge. Nothing was changing that.

Yeosang stared at you, dumbfounded. All of that work and his plan failed. His first time using his demonic capabilities and it was futile. Yeosang, already fed up, slapped his palm against his forehead.

“Oh my fucking god.” He really couldn’t bring himself to look at you. Yeosang stood up and closed his eyes, phasing back into the demon's realm.

“So, I read more about Y/N.” San poured Yeosang a drink, which he downed in one gulp a second later. “They set a vehicle on fire? Yeosang! Why did you gate keep that information?!”

“Gate keep? It’s in the public records.”

San rolled his eyes, hesitantly pouring Yeosang another drink, only for Yeosang to down that in one gulp as well.

“At least take a second to taste it. I brewed it using the herbs in purgatory.” San frowned.

“You can harvest herbs from Earth?”

“You’re funny.” San scoffed, “you’ve never met a reaper, have you?”

“Only the Souls Keeper. Hongjoong.” Yeosang allowed San to pour him some more of whatever he had brewed.

“Reapers are different from Souls Keepers.”

Yeosang groaned. The more he learned, the more he wished this information was just an unspoken fact. He wished there was a way to automatically know everything, whether it was shot up his veins or absorbed in his brain.

“Seonghwa is the lead Reaper. You can go into purgatory and meet him. It’s also your only link with other Angels if they agree to meet you… Maybe you and Wooyoung can meet and get on the same page or something.” San handed Yeosang a key that was larger than his hand.

“That’s my spare key. Do not lose it. It unlocks the gates to the purgatory realm and you won’t be able to leave without it.”

Yeosang looked over the key, turning it over in his hands, and felt the weight of it.

“Seonghwa has the only direct line to the Angels, so you’ll have to talk to him anyway. He’s usually cooperative with most of us demons. Shouldn’t be a problem.”

Yeosang stood up from the chair San had in his living space. It wasn’t much, but San didn’t seem to mind and it wasn’t Yeosang’s place to degrade a house that wasn’t his.

“Thank you, San.” Yeosang held the heavy key in his hands, flashing a quick smile at the younger demon. San smiled back, only wider and longer lasting than Yeosang’s.

It didn’t take long for Yeosang to find the gates leading to purgatory. Especially with the key he had. He wondered if it would have appeared without the key.

Yeosang lifted the key and fit it perfectly into the keyhole before turning it. The black gates had creaked open, the sound echoing throughout both realms.

Once the gates had opened, Yeosang retrieved the key to honor San’s wishes. Yeosang was pleasantly surprised by the change in scent. It wasn’t much of a change, but it sure was better than the amalgamation of many horrid stenches.

“Seonghwa?” Yeosang called out. He had never stepped into the purgatory realm before. Yeosang was then startled by a tapping on his shoulder, immediately turning to face whomever it was.

“You called?” Seonghwa, presumably, raised an eyebrow, dropping the arm he used to tap Yeosang’s shoulder, to his side.

“Yes… I’m Yeosang, I was-“

“I know who you are. You’re the Fallen Angel. The first Guardian Demon.” Seonghwa nodded in the direction he had begun to walk. Yeosang followed, surprised at how much Seonghwa knew about him.

Word must travel fast.

Seonghwa took a deep breath, inhaling the mist that blanketed the realm.

“I admire what you did for Wooyoung.”

“You know what happened?” Yeosang furrowed his eyebrows. He felt a sense of dread, hoping the truth wouldn’t come out and then Wooyoung would be stripped of his Guardian Angel title.

His soul's commitment.

“You’d think your gods and goddesses would know all. But I won’t tell anyone. I know everyone’s story. And if you don’t believe me, ask Hongjoong. He knows the truth too.” Seonghwa gave Yeosang a quick pat on his back. “Hongjoong and I, are not bound by rules or contracts or commitments. We will not tell a soul.”

Yeosang scratched the back of his neck as he followed Seonghwa. “It’s good that you know Wooyoung because I have to talk to him.”

“Can’t.” Seonghwa’s reply was so quick that Yeosang wasn’t sure he heard him right.

“What?”

“Wooyoung is busy with his human. I can’t contact him directly right now.”

“Damnit!”

Seonghwa laughed, “Just go to Earth. What’s the worst he can do? Kill Y/N?”

“Yes!” Yeosang ran back towards the gate, lifting the heavy key again and repeating the process of entering, by exiting.

Yeosang felt you near.

He also felt Wooyoung near. And as soon as he found Wooyoung, Yeosang pushed Wooyoung against a wall, angrily pinning him to it.

“What the hell?! I told you to let me handle them!”

“I can’t just stay away! They are my human too!” Wooyoung stared at his friend, wide-eyed. Yeosang loosened his grip and let him go, not wanting to hurt him.

“You know if you help them, they will be commissioned as a demon.” Yeosang glanced over at you as you continued walking, unbeknownst of their short-lived conflict.

“I know. But there has to be another way without you traumatizing them.” Wooyoung crossed his arms. Yeosang shot a glare at him, following you as he started to feel a tinge of pain the further you walked away.

“It was one goddamn nightmare… And it didn’t work. They are dead set on getting revenge.”

“I can change that!” Wooyoung jogged after You and Yeosang and met his friend's pace.

“You need to go back to the Angel realm and let me handle Y/N.”

“Are you upset with me? I said I’m sorry.”

“Sorry won’t make the gods and goddesses forgive me! It was humiliating, Wooyoung! You shouldn’t have been getting into shit you knew you weren’t supposed to!” Yeosang halted his steps and faced Wooyoung. Every ounce of hurt was evident on Yeosang’s face.

“Yeo-“

“You saw how fast they replaced me! They didn’t give me a second chance! If you make another mistake, I won’t be there to save you!”

“Then why did you?! Why did you lie and say you did it?”

Yeosang was on the verge of letting every tear he held back puddle to his feet. Wooyoung manipulated the future Guardian Angel database. Hacked into it, as humans would call it.

“Because…”

Wooyoung wanted to be sure that his friend had been granted the Lead Guardian Angel souls commitment. But he was caught by Yeosang, who took the fall for it as Angel guards were immediately alerted.

Yeosang yelped, the pain he had ignored had grown significantly larger the further you had walked away. Wooyoung was unaffected.

“Yeosang? Are you okay? What’s going on?” Bombarded by questions, Yeosang had attempted to crawl toward your direction in an attempt to lessen the pain.

He felt a chill run down his spine, sensing danger coming your way.

“Y/N!” Yeosang yelled just before his vision had darkened as the excruciating pain had become too unbearable.

Your mortal enemy was powerful. That was a fact. You were smart. That was also a fact.

You were alert, but he was strong.

You were guarded, but he outnumbered you.

You were even stubborn, but in your mind, you had to be. Otherwise, bad things would continue to happen to good people.

And maybe you weren’t a good person before, but god, you were trying.

One more sin and you swore you would leave it all behind.

It almost cost you, though.

The copper taste filled your mouth as you were splayed on the ground, bleeding and twitching from the pain of being battered by a blunt object repeatedly.

Any ounce of you that fought back before had since depleted, a groan leaving your lips after each hit.

Only for a second did you see the silhouette of a man watching you from afar as you lay there on the pavement, running on your last bit of fumes.

The silhouette walked closer to you and the pain you felt had soothed away somehow. That, or you were completely numb.

“Close your eyes.”

Yeosang shot upright in an unfamiliar- and uncomfortable bed, trying to calm his panicked breaths. He felt you nearby, yet so far away.

He felt the pain you experienced as if it were his own and there was nothing he could’ve done to stop it during the time he was unconscious.

He even saw Seonghwa. His face was the clearest thing you and Yeosang saw while you were struggling to get back up.

You weren’t dead. Yeosang wouldn’t be able to feel the connection if you were. Then again, Yeosang has never experienced being someone’s Guardian.

Nor was he taught what it felt like if they ever died.

He could see you. Your location was vivid in his mind. The beeping of the monitors that kept track of your vitals. The sterile scent, the bright fluorescent lights, the hospital bed, the IV in your arm, how it felt, even. Yeosang saw, smelled, heard, and felt it all.

And then he appeared in that same room as you. He tried to will you into waking up. He shook you, tapped you, and even tried calling your name.

You weren’t waking up.

You weren’t dead either.

Some would say you were stuck in limbo. Purgatory wasn’t limbo. The mist obstructed your vision and nothing hurt anymore. You knew you were hurt, physically and emotionally, but you couldn’t feel it.

You saw the silhouetted man again, only this time he wasn’t a silhouette. Striding toward you, it seemed as if the mist had parted ways to let him through.

“Am I dead?”

“Why does everyone ask that?” Seonghwa couldn’t help but laugh. You failed to see the humor in it though.

“I feel…” you pondered what you felt inside if it wasn’t any more hurt.

“Free? Dead? Scared?”

“Happy.” You spoke. “I feel happy.”

Seonghwa gave you a soft nod and an empathetic smile. “I see. You have lived a tough life.”

“I will wake up soon. Won’t I?” Your heart sank a little at the thought of having to go back. You knew it would entail more continuous pain and disappointment of having failed your mission of getting revenge.

“Yes. It’s not your time. Not yet. You are just here temporarily.” Seonghwa walked closer to you and put his hand on your shoulder. “Sorry to say, but you have to return now.”

Your eyes shot open, immediately recognizing the room you were in. All at once, the pain you’ve felt for years and the pain you’ve gained from being beaten almost to death had collectively returned without a single minute to spare you any preparation.

Tears brimmed your eyes and you couldn’t help but let out a quiet whimper.

“Finally.” A voice you have never heard before startled you, a deep echo traveled through the almost silent room aside from the beeping of the monitors.

You turned your head as much as you could muster and saw him. Black hair, dark eyes, soft skin, a birthmark near his eye, and a faint outline of ash and flame around his body.

“You are difficult, you know that?” He sat in the chair across the room from your bed and he had one foot on the chair, hugging his knee to his chest.

“I’m tired of trying to anonymously guide you. You haven’t listened once, I hate traumatizing people and I can’t keep letting you stress me out like this.”

“Who the hell are you?” You asked, slowly- and painfully, sitting up.

“I’m Yeosang. Your Guardian… Demon.”

“Guardian Demon? That’s not real.” You questioned. Yeosang groaned, “I know, right? Who thinks up these titles?!”

“For a demon, you are handsome.” You rubbed your eyes. You were convinced you were dead for a second, but you remembered the mist-blanketed place you were just in, the man that seemed way too mystical to be real.

You wouldn’t have believed Yeosang was an actual demon if you hadn’t met that mysterious man.

“You actually believe me? Like, you’re not even gonna call bullshit?” Yeosang sat up, straightening his back. You shrugged, “I met another handsome man in this mist-covered area and nothing hurt, so, I might as well believe you too.”

“Ah, you met Seonghwa.” Yeosang stood up and walked towards the window, peeking outside. He sensed danger imminent, again.

“What are you supposed to do? Just guide me?” You asked, “are you like a Guardian Angel?”

“Would’ve been. But yes, in a way. I sense danger, I try to scare you away. The only problem is, you’re fucking difficult to scare and it’s even more difficult to keep you alive.” Yeosang looked at you, crossing his arms.

Ash sprinkled to the ground and disappeared a second later before repeating every time he moved. You weren’t entirely sure he was aware of it. Or how cool it looked to you.

“You’re not very good at keeping people alive.” You glanced at the monitor beeping.

“You’re not very good at minding your own business,” Yeosang remarked. You smiled with a tilt of your head.

“It is my business.”

Yeosang rolled his eyes in defeat. You had a point, as much as he didn’t want to admit it. You were after a guy you had years of beef with.

“Since you’re a demon,” You smirked, pausing to make sure he was listening. When Yeosang raised his eyebrows, his arms still crossed over his chest, you continued.

“Want to help me break out of here?”

Yeosang was still an Angel.

He was kind, despite his witty sarcasm, but you found him to be funny, he was gentle with you and even showed guilt if he thought he had accidentally hurt you, and you’ve noticed how shy he is- For a demon.

He was an Angel in a Demon form. Misunderstood, even. But you didn’t know the full story.

Even if you did, it wouldn’t change your mind. That was one thing you guaranteed.

He took care of you after breaking you out of the hospital, though he still felt conflicted on whether he really should’ve or not.

Point is, Yeosang was gentle with you. He nursed you back to health and was careful not to add to the pain you already felt. You were further unconvinced that he was a demon.

The outline of animated ash and flame did little to nothing to convince you.

You had spent days- Weeks, with him and he never left you. You weren’t aware of what happens when he’s a certain distance from you. He never told you either. He was shy, he made you laugh, he took care of you, watched over you, warned you when he sensed something or someone dangerous, and he tried to help you deal with your pain.

Yeosang, this Yeosang? He was anything but a demon.

He was like your safe place. Your comfort zone.

He was an angel. A misunderstood, fallen angel.

For some reason, fallen angel seemed more incorrect than a demon.

Yeosang knew everything about you too. Your darkest parts, your regrets, fears, everything. And not once did he ever interrupt you to say, “I know.”

He listened.

He learned.

And he accepted you for you.

He wasn’t a demon.

Yeosang had left a note for you while you slept, telling you he would return soon, and that he needed to speak to a friend of his in the demonic realm.

Aside from leaving a note, he left you alone while you slept, avoiding touching you and giving you another nightmare. He still felt lingering guilt from the first nightmare he had given you.

Yeosang trudged through mud mixed with fresh blood and remains, remembering how rancid the scent was down here.

He followed the path until he came upon a familiar, yet dilapidated shack.

San immediately opened the front door as if to expect Yeosang. That same smile he always had was plastered on his face.

Yeosang found himself smiling back.

“Welcome back!” San and Yeosang entered the shack, it was in the same condition it had been in before, but Yeosang didn’t complain.

“How is Y/N?” San poured Yeosang a drink and judging by the smell of it and the way it sizzled, this had been a new and different drink.

“They are okay. Recovering nicely too.” Yeosang accepted the drink and stared at the sizzling liquid.

“Good. You gonna deal with the guy that caused them weeks of recovery or are you still living by angelic means?” San sat beside Yeosang, noticing his stare towards the cup he held in his hands. San chuckled. “I call this masterpiece, blood ocean. It’s not actual blood, though… Ew.”

Yeosang took a sip and immediately tried to suppress the cough he needed so desperately to let out. San laughed in response, “I know. It’s strong. But it’s non-alcoholic if that makes it better.”

“No, not at all.” Yeosang cleared his throat. “By the way, I am not living- But of course, I’m going to deal with this guy. Y/N… They deserve better.”

“Even after all they’ve done before?”

Yeosang nodded without a moment's hesitation, “if you knew them, you’d see the way I do.”

San took a sip from his cup, ingesting it better than Yeosang had. Then he stood up again to take his cup to what would be considered San’s kitchen. Yeosang took another sip, only to decide he couldn’t handle the rest of it, and gave the cup back to San, still full of the strangely edible liquid.

“Blood ocean, is made with a herb from the Angelic Realm, believe it or not.” San came back to sit beside Yeosang. “I asked Seonghwa to retrieve some from Jongho while you were on an Earthly vacation.”

“Jongho… How is he?” Yeosang coughed into his elbow as he asked. San smiled.

“He seems busier since you’ve been demoted… Or promoted… We couldn’t meet up directly but he still passed on some herbs.”

San leaned back in his chair and observed Yeosang. The ash from his outline fell around him, but never on him.

“Do you like having Y/N as your first human?”

“Yes.” Yeosang didn’t hesitate, “I care about them. I like the aura they have. I like that they don’t see me as someone bad just because I’m a demon now. So, yes. I do like having Y/N as my first human.”

“Hm.” San stared at Yeosang for a moment, followed by silence. Yeosang took a deep breath, the aftertaste of blood ocean lingered in his mouth.

“Do you like Y/N?”

“Yes.” Yeosang felt like he was repeating himself. San chuckled, “romantically?”

Yeosang froze. He thought about it before. When you were talking to him about your happiest moments. How he wished he could absorb that feeling too rather than just the bad. He remembered how your eyes lit up as you recalled those memories.

He remembered the way your eyes lit up at a lot of things you spoke about. Your favorite things, mainly, but the memories he, as a demon, couldn’t see or feel.

But he still loved every second.

“Yes,” Yeosang responded after what San felt was an eternity. “I… I do.”

“Never heard of a demon and human relationship before.” San’s smile dropped and Yeosang felt the energy in the room darken even more, considering the realm they were in.

“It’s not forbidden if that’s what you’re wondering. But,” San sighed, leaning forward. “It will hurt when they inevitably die. Even if a human is destined as an angel or demon, it would be years, centuries, lifetimes- your lifetime, before you see them again.”

Yeosang didn’t speak. He just stared at San and tried to grasp the meaning of what San had just said.

“I won’t stop you, but I do ask that you are prepared for the inevitable.”

You, a human, who Yeosang had grown attached to. You who had the power, unknown to you, of breaking a demon’s heart.

If a broken heart was the worst he would get in the end, then he wasn’t afraid. He would go through that kind of pain over and over again if he could if that meant he could see you smile.

Yeosang felt a strange euphoria that had been short-lived when imminent danger clogged his senses.

“Ah, I have to go.” Yeosang rose to his feet and began to head for the door. “Y/N is in danger again.”

San softly laughed, “Already? They usually this stubborn?”

“Oh yeah.”

Like that, the door had closed behind Yeosang and he had raced to the exit that led to the land of the living.

It happened in the morning, shortly after you had read Yeosang’s note. The disappointment and feelings of worry that he might not return, that maybe he just left you for good, had filled your mind.

It happened in the morning while you were distracted by your feelings of abandonment. It wasn’t like he would never return. He was bound to you.

But something awakened inside of you and you felt an attachment to Yeosang.

You were chained to a pipe in a gross, worn down, and seemingly abandoned room. Wherever you were, you knew no one would come looking for you.

Even Yunho, your only current friend, wouldn’t know where to look. And he always knew where to look.

There was one person or being, that you thought of. Yeosang. He was bound to you, after all.

He would know. And for the first time, since you’ve been kidnapped from your home, you screamed a scream that was meant for Yeosang.

“Yeosang!”

You were met by a slap from the very person that caused you pain. He grabbed your face roughly and forced you to meet his eyes.

“Yeosang, huh? Who is that? Someone else I will need to take care of?” He roughly let go of your face and began to pace again. “Someone else I need to release from this world?”

“Screw you! You’ll never succeed.”

You felt comfort, knowing that you were right about that. No one could kill a demon. How would they try?

“I already have.” The guy drew his gun and aimed it toward you. You remained still, unblinking.

The downside if he shot you? You wouldn’t live to see his downfall. The upside? You wouldn’t be in pain anymore.

You smiled, staring down at the barrel of the gun. Not because you wouldn’t feel pain anymore and not to piss off your enemy.

But because Yeosang was there.

And he was pissed.

“How many goddamn times are you going to keep showing up?!” Yeosang’s eyes appeared to have darkened, if at all possible. Your enemy could see him too.

You widened your eyes when the gun went off and Yeosang had been right in the line of fire, but Yeosang just laughed.

“You can’t kill something that’s not alive.”

Your enemy continued to fire and for the first time, you were given the satisfaction of seeing him in fear. Actual trembling fear.

You watched the scene unfold, and how Yeosang, your angel, had become a proper demon at handling the man who caused you so much pain.

“Didn’t think you had it in you.”

You were sat in front of Yeosang, who tended to any wounds you sustained during his visit to San. Your enemy had left in a hurry after getting the lights beat out of him.

“You did say I was bad at keeping people alive.”

“Pssh, I say a lot of things.” You eyed his hands that carefully fixed the bandages that had been slipping off.

“Do you still believe I’m a demon?” Yeosang asked. You watched the ash falling on your skin, only you never felt it.

“Well,” You took in a deep breath. Dust and the scent of mold caused you to scrunch your nose, “I watched you take ten bullets to the chest and you still beat his ass and you seem perfectly fine, so… Yes. I believe you. Always have. Sort of.”

“Sort of?” Yeosang looked at you, yet still held your arm in the middle of rewrapping a bandage around a pre-existing bruise from weeks ago.

“You’re more like an angel.”

Yeosang felt his heart skip a beat. No one referred to him as an angel anymore. No one considered him one anymore either, at least not in a serious way.

Until you did.

“We have to get out of here before he comes back with more people.” Yeosang proceeded to rise to his feet, helping you stand. His touch generated a feeling of anger and fear in you, but he wasn’t aware that his feelings would absorb into you.

Only what he intended was what he was aware of. Still, you somehow didn’t mind.

“Quitting so easily?” You joked. How hard could it be to take down waves of goons with your demon companion?

Yeosang just stared at you, a shake of his head following. “Let’s go.”

You followed him out of the abandoned building, which appeared to be an old church. You laughed at the irony.

“Hey, aren’t you supposed to be writhing in pain in the presence of the Lord’s home?”

“Oh my, a demon in church? Who’d have thought?” Yeosang kicked down the front door after it failed to open the first time.

“Common myth. But if you want me to, I will.” Yeosang continued to walk ahead with you following. You took in your surroundings, seeing nothing but an empty dirt road for miles.

“Now what? Drag me to hell and teleport me home?” You asked. Part of you was dead serious. You were already in hell, after all.

“If I drag you to hell, you will die.” Yeosang put his hands on his hips and thought for a moment.

He was stronger than you. He was a demon after all. You couldn’t take ten bullets the way he did. They actually passed right through him.

You would have died for sure.

“On my back, let’s go.” Yeosang compromised by opting to carry you to your house. You climbed onto his back, still sore, but at least you didn’t have to walk.

Despite how long the trip actually took, Yeosang’s speed made you question what it looked like to any cars that eventually passed by.

Were you invisible? Did they see Yeosang too?

Can everyone see Yeosang now?

“Wait, take me to my friend's house.” You realized you were more than halfway home and how dangerous it would be to just simply return after being kidnapped.

“Yunho?”

“How do you know his name?” You asked, yet immediately dropped the question, “Yes. He has a gate with a code to his house, let alone the cameras fucking everywhere. No one’s getting in or out easily.”

“Language,” Yeosang mumbled as he changed his route. He realized then that he didn’t have access to Yunho’s location. He wasn’t the human he was bound to.

“Please. You’ve said far blasphemous things.”

“Where does Yunho live?”

You shut your mouth, trying to remember where your friend lived. You weren’t bad with addresses, but you weren’t good with them either.

You just remembered that Yunho had a huge house, was rich, and maybe a little paranoid- which he would argue that he’s just trying to be safe.

And you believed him. He was the only person in your criminal reign that didn’t turn on you as everyone else had.

“Take me to the rich side of town.”

Yeosang began to walk again, only to stop.

“Where the hell is the rich side? North? East? South? West? I’m not a GPS, Y/N.”

You sighed, burying your head into his shoulder. Your memory was fuzzy, and you didn’t have your phone on you to pull up a GPS.

Yeosang walked you over to the nearest payphone. He helped you off of his back and allowed you to into the booth as he waited outside.

You used a coin you found on the ground and dialed Yunho’s number.

“Hello! Can I call you back? I’m in the middle of getting banned in fifty countries!”

“Yunho.”

“Oh, Y/N? Long time no hear… I was kidding about getting banned in fifty countries. Just trying to scare unknowns away.” Yunho awkwardly laughed on the other line.

“I don’t think you’re kidding,” You looked out at Yeosang, who had gotten distracted by a stray cat that actually let him pet it. “Remember when you said I always had a place to stay as long as you were in town?”

“Yeah.”

“May I use that offer today?”

“It’s night.”

“Oh my god! Yunho!”

Yunho’s laugh emitted loudly in the booth, even as you held the phone away from your ear.

“Yes! Yes! You know where to find me.”

“I don’t.”

“Again? It’s in the North. Want me to send Mingi?”

“Holy shit, he’s back? yes! I haven’t seen him in a while!” You grinned, glancing outside to see Yeosang suddenly surrounded by two more stray cats and giggling at their cuteness.

“Too bad. He doesn’t drive.”

“Then why did you-“

“Where are you? I will get you unless you’re wanted for something.”

“What? Like getting banned in fifty countries? I’m,” you looked around for a notable landmark. “Just start driving by phone booths. You’ll find me eventually.”

“Fun. See you in three hours.”

You hung the phone up, opening the door. Yeosang was completely unaware that you were done with your phone call.

“Thought animals feared demons.” You crossed your hands. Yeosang looked at you, a bright look on his face.

“That’s very stereotypical, Y/N. Look how cute they are!”

You smiled at your demon companion actually showing happiness.

“Did Yunho tell you his address?” Yeosang asked, not looking away from the purring animals. You shook your head, still wearing your smile.

“He’s actually on his way.”

“Cool.”

Heart thumped, hitched breathing, and a lot of blood on his hands, Wooyoung ran through Jongho’s garden.

He knew Angel Guards would be on their way. They were always fast when sin was committed within their realm.

“Jong…Jongho!” Wooyoung stammered, his voice catching in his throat. “Jongho!”

Wooyoung frantically searched the garden for the other angel.

“Jongho-“

“What? Oh my… What did you do?” Jongho appeared, immediately wide-eyed upon seeing the crimson mess on Wooyoung’s hands and clothes.

“Accident! It- It was an accident! I just wanted-“

“Calm down, meet me in purgatory.” Jongho glanced behind Wooyoung, hearing the guards nearing.

Wooyoung nodded, ran to the nearest gate to purgatory, and entered the misty, gloomy realm.

Wooyoung wiped the blood on his shirt in an attempt to get it off of his hands. He wasn’t completely lying when he said it was an accident.

He never intended to murder someone, let alone another angel.

Nosey angel.

“Wooyoung, what did you do?” Jongho’s voice startled Wooyoung as he entered the realm soon after.

“Accident-“

“Tell me. Now. You have a lot of angels looking for you, it’s a manhunt up there right now so you have five seconds to tell me the truth.” Jongho was stern when he spoke, his arms crossed over his chest.

Wooyoung nodded, collecting his thoughts.

“Yeosang and I share a human. I only wanted to see how long their life was. I… Manipulated the database and absorbed the information to find out how long Y/N has to live.”

Jongho dropped his arms at his side, “so, back up. When Yeosang was publicly denounced for stealing information about the future guardian angels, was that actually you?”

Wooyoung began to cry, nodding. “Yes.”

“I knew it!” Jongho’s eyes went wide again. “Yeosang covered for you!”

“Jongho, what do I do?”

Jongho looked behind the older angel, seeing Seonghwa standing a few feet behind him. His mysterious aura parted the blanket of mist.

“What can we do?” Jongho asked, directly the question towards Seonghwa, whom Wooyoung was now aware of his presence.

Seonghwa didn’t speak and instead snapped his fingers, summoning Yeosang into the realm. Confused, Yeosang hesitantly made his way to the three.

“Wooyoung… That better be paint.” Yeosang couldn’t avert his eyes from the crimson stains on Wooyoung’s clothing and hands. Even more so concerned seeing Wooyoung had been crying.

“Yeosang-“

“What happened?” Yeosang didn’t wait for a second longer, pressing his palm against Wooyoung's arm and absorbing the negative memories he had.

Wooyoung pulled away, but Yeosang already learned what he needed to know.

At first, Wooyoung, Jongho, and even Seonghwa- for a split second, were expecting Yeosang to blow up at Wooyoung for getting into more trouble.

For stealing more information similar to what had gotten Yeosang cast out. For murdering another Angel who caught Wooyoung in the act. Wooyoung still not learning how to cover his tracks or lock a door.

But Yeosang was staring at Seonghwa, the Reaper, with a hurt and spiteful, volatile glare.

“You told me if I guided Y/N to the Angelic Realm, they wouldn’t die an early grave.”

“That’s true.” Seonghwa maintained his composure. He stared at Yeosang, waiting for him to continue. Jongho and Wooyoung stood silent, unknowing what to do, say, or even how to react.

“Two years is an early grave!” Yeosang yelled, shaking the entire realm. Wooyoung and Jongho flinched simultaneously despite not being the ones getting yelled at. Seonghwa, however, maintained his stance.

“Early grave is a grave less than their allotted lifetime.”

Something about Seonghwa’s calm voice only angered Yeosang further. The fact that you had two years left in your life wasn’t something he could accept so easily.

“What about Hongjoong? Can’t he change their lifetime?”

Seonghwa slightly smirked at the younger demon’s naivety. Still, Seonghwa snapped his fingers again, and Hongjoong- Who Yeosang, Wooyoung, and Jongho had seen around in the angelic realm on occasion.

“What?” Hongjoong walked towards the group, the mist parting for him as well.

“I have a favor to ask,” Yeosang glanced at Wooyoung. Hongjoong shook his head immediately.

“I’m can’t cover for your friend.”

Seonghwa looked at the ground, a laugh leaving his lips. Yeosang balled his fists in frustration.

“He’s asking for his soulmate.”

“He doesn’t have a soulmate.” Hongjoong looked at his wrist, checking the time ticking away on his watch.

“Let me reiterate. He wants his human to have more time in their life.” Seonghwa smiled. Hongjoong stared at Yeosang, an unfortunate expression following.

“That is beyond my capabilities. That is up to Y/N and Y/N only. I’m sorry.”

“Holy shit!” You entered Yunho’s house, immediately seeing Mingi. “You’re alive!”

Mingi grinned, taking his hand out of the bag of chips he held to give you half of a hug.

“I should be saying the same! You went AWOL for weeks!” Mingi seemed genuinely happy to see you, as you were with him.

“You went AWOL for months!” You remarked as Yunho had finished locking every lock on his front door.

“Oh yeah, sorry.”

Mingi held out the bag of chips, offering you some. You refused, though. Mainly because there were only crumbs left and Mingi knew this too.

There was something relieving about seeing your old friend in the flesh again. Alive, too.

As far as you knew, You and Yunho were ex-criminals. You, not so much, but Yunho definitely. Mingi was just the friend that tagged along but never participated.

He knew everything and never told a soul out of respect for you and Yunho. He listened to your and Yunho’s advice to lay low, for months until recently.

Despite not being the main target, he was still a target by association.

You were a team once and forever.

“Mingi! Did you lock the back door after taking out the trash?”

Yunho was cautious. Arguably paranoid and for a good reason. By the look on Mingi’s face, he had forgotten to lock the back door again.

Yunho let out a deep sigh, heading for the door. Mingi crumpled up the bag of chips after pouring the leftover crumbs into his mouth.

“If it makes you feel any better, no one would think to get in at this hour.” Mingi checked the time to be sure of what he said was true.

“You never know, buddy.” You gave him a quick pat on his back before walking by him to meet Yunho at the back door.

You stopped in your tracks, hearing an all too familiar voice. Multiple voices. Yunho was compliant, but if it were you, you wouldn’t have been.

“Where is Y/N?”

“Why is your face bruised?” Yunho asked, immediately followed by a groan.

You heard footsteps, and returned to Mingi, pulling him towards the safe room Yunho had installed.

“I need you to be quiet or so help me, Mingi.” You whispered to your confused friend as you slowly and quietly shut the door before covering it with something to make the door less obvious.

You ran up the stairs, looking for a weapon before the other guys found you. The ones who turned on you despite all you’ve done to save their asses.

Didn’t matter now. What mattered was keeping Yunho alive somehow. The worry and fear you felt, you weren’t sure if it were Yeosang trying to warn you to stop and just hide with Mingi, or if it were your feelings.

The fear you would lose Yunho too. PossiblyMingi too, if he attempted to come out from hiding.

Where do you keep the weapons?

He had to have one. No one has this much security and doesn’t have a weapon for added protection.

You turned a corner in Yunho’s giant home, feeling compelled to enter a room you had never been into. It had a layer of security to it as well and for a split second, you wondered why Yunho never used a burner phone for phone calls.

That was beside the point. You knew the password to this door, somehow, and behind it was an arsenal of weapons you never thought Yunho kept.

How he obtained them? You don’t know.

You grabbed a gun, ammo, and a knife that you could easily conceal, and left the room, heading downstairs.

All this while Wooyoung watched you, cursing himself for only being able to give you positivity. He needed Yeosang for this.

As bullets were fired, Wooyoung panicked and Yeosang appeared in that same room with him.

“I’m sorry. It didn’t work! They won’t stay away!” Wooyoung profusely apologized. Yeosang grabbed a short sword Yunho had and offered a look of reassurance to his angel friend.

“Calm down, and leave it to me.”

Yeosang followed your path throughout the house, seeing you as you shot back. He saw your enemy as well, how he ordered a retreat all while having two others take Yunho with them.

“Yunho!” You screamed, running towards them. Yeosang grabbed your shoulders and instilled as much anxiety and fear into you until you had second thoughts.

“Stop! He’s my friend!” You began to cry a stream of frustrated tears. “He’s my only family left!”

Yeosnag didn’t let go of your shoulders but hated every second of it. The fear, the anxiety, the hurt he was causing you. It was debilitating you but it was for your well-being, as strange as that was.

Yeosang squeezed his eyes shut, wanting to scream from your now shared pain, but he held it in as you collapsed to your knees in a hyperventilating, sobbing heap on the carpet in Yunho’s home.

“I’m so sorry,” Yeosang muttered, knowing those were just words in the end. You weren’t any more calmed hearing those words.

Your only family, found family, was in the hands of your enemy. Someone you knew was dangerous. Someone who almost killed you, twice even.

“Yeosang, you have to save Yunho!” You cried out as Mingi pushed his way out of the concealed safe room door. Mingi watched with a frown, seeing you a mess.

He noticed Yeosang too. The outline of ash and flames around his body continued to fall and crackle in a consistent movement.

Then he noticed Wooyoung, who had come down the stairs. His faint halo and wings had a pattern unique only to Wooyoung.

“We can’t,” Wooyoung spoke up, overhearing everything. You looked at him, tears in your eyes. The halo and wings gave his title away.

And you wondered where he had been all this time. You wiped your eyes, your sorrow being replaced by cold, frustrating anger.

There would come a day when you weren’t constantly living in fear, loathing, vengefulness, or regret. Where your heart wouldn’t be in it anymore to keep fighting the wars waging in your mind and with your enemy.

“Why the hell not? You’ve saved me! Why not Yunho?” You argued.

“Yunho isn’t our human.” Yeosang swallowed back the lump in his throat. His emotions were just as high as yours were.

“Well, he’s my human!” You yelled, forcing yourself to stand up again. You couldn’t believe what they were saying.

You would fight for him, as long as it took. Yeosang knew this. Wooyoung knew this.

Yunho was your family. Mingi was your friend.

And they knew you would never give them up so easily.

“I love you.”

You weren’t sure you heard him correctly. Your mind was just playing tricks on you- The demon? The angel? Was any of it even real?

“Now’s not the time.” You tried to walk past him, only for Yeosang to appear in a swift movement in front of you.

“I know. But I love you. I shouldn’t, but I do and I can’t lose you. So please just-“

“So you understand. I can’t lose Yunho.”

“You can’t save everyone.” Yeosang took a deep breath. You scoffed as tears began to leak out of your eyes once more.

“I haven’t saved anyone.” Your voice cracked, and for probably the first time, Yeosang had wrapped his arms around you tighter than you could imagine.

And despite the negative feelings you absorbed from each other, it was the most comforting hug you’ve received in years.

“You saved me,” Yeosang mumbled low enough for only you to hear. Wooyoung and Mingi glanced at each other, silent and confused.

“You want me to save Yunho, I will have to relinquish you as my human and switch with his guardian.” Yeosang cupped your crying face into his hands, wiping your tears away with his warm thumbs.

“Yeosang, no. You may never see Y/N again if you do.” Wooyoung spoke up, moving closer to where you two stood. Mingi took this as an opportunity to speak now.

“Hi, yeah, what’s going on?” Mingi leaned against the railing of the stairs. His head began to hurt from the confusion.

No one responded.

Yeosang accepted the possibility. He told you how he felt, he got to hold you one last time, and now he’s going to save Yunho.

For you. The mortal he would never be able to spend eternity with.

“I’ll do it.” Yeosang felt numb. Wooyoung shook his head.

“I will,” Wooyoung announced. “You know Y/N more than I do. I will be Yunho’s new Guardian Angel while I still can.”

You felt relief fill your chest, your guardian angel- whom you’d barely met, was going to take over as Yunho’s guardian.

He would lead you both to Yunho.

“Hey! Context?” Mingi threw his arms up. You, Yeosang, and Wooyoung looked at him.

“The context is; Go upstairs and get a weapon.” You ordered. “We’re getting Yunho.”

“That’s not context enough, who are they? What is going on? I don’t know how to fight!” Mingi argued. You pointed upstairs.

“You don’t need to fight. Just defend yourself. Go get a weapon.”

Mingi sighed and reluctantly jogged up the stairs, stopping halfway. “I’m only doing this for Yunho.”

You smiled at him in response.

“He could’ve just… Had this one. I don’t know why I got it.” Yeosang lifted the short sword he had brought down but didn’t use.

“Yeosang.” Wooyoung cleared his throat, motioning towards the front door. “A word?”

Yeosang walked away from you and entered the purgatory realm with Wooyoung upon leaving Yunho’s house.

“You know I’m going to be cast out if I re-enter the Angelic Realm.” Wooyoung rubbed his hands together nervously. Yeosang nodded.

“I’m sorry. For bringing you down with me, I mean.” Wooyoung avoided Yeosang’s eyes as he spoke.

Yeosang brought Wooyoung into a hug, “I would do it again.”

Wooyoung felt grateful for Yeosang yet sorrowful at the same time. He felt another feeling, a feeling he didn’t recall feeling before.

He felt free.

No more strict rules, no more need to be perfect for an entire community of angels. No more fear of being caught doing something wrong or needing to filter himself to please the gods and goddesses.

Sure, it wasn’t bad. The angelic realm is and will always be everyone’s dream. Everything is better there.

But it wasn’t for him.

“Since I’m already damned,” Wooyoung started, pulling away from Yeosang’s embrace. “Any last requests?”

Yeosang grinned, “Find out Yunho’s location?”

“And?” Wooyoung raised an eyebrow.

Yeosang’s grin faded. “What?”

“Nothing. Watch over Y/N and Mingi.” Wooyoung began to walk towards the nearest gate into the angelic realm.

And Yeosang watched. The only thing he could do for his damned friend.

Wooyoung raised his hands in the air, a proud and fearful smile on his face as he walked through Jongho’s garden. Jongho hadn’t noticed Wooyoung had re-entered the angelic realm until he heard the commotion of guards rushing to arrest Wooyoung.

And Wooyoung smiled towards him, “catch you in the in-between.”

“That’s not what it’s called,” Jongho mumbled, watching the guards putting handcuffs on Wooyoung.

“Jung Wooyoung, you are to be detained and cast out into eternal hellfire for the sins of theft on two accounts and murder.”

Wooyoung was cooperative. He didn’t fight it nor did he show any form of remorse- Save for the angel he accidentally murdered.

The gods and goddesses didn’t see it that way.

But that didn’t matter.

It didn’t matter for Yeosang, who was falsely accused of theft, and it wouldn’t matter for Wooyoung, who did commit these sins.

“You are to be stripped of your soul's commitment to being a Guardian Angel within the coming hour.”

Wooyoung thought about Yeosang. He thought about you as well, and Yunho, who was kidnapped by your enemy. Mingi, who openly admitted to not knowing how to fight, but was still ready to charge in and save Yunho with you.

For Yunho.

“Can you speed the process up?” Wooyoung mumbled.

“What was that?” A guard asked, giving Wooyoung a warning look.

“I said,” Wooyoung glanced at Jongho and Hongjoong, who had joined in to watch out of curiosity despite being on a tight schedule.

“Speed up the goddamn process.”

Yeosang paced, waiting for Wooyoung’s return. You and Mingi waited anxiously.

Waiting. Just like Yunho was waiting for someone to go save him.

“We’re wasting time.” You’ve had enough waiting. The anxieties that filled you, thinking of what could be happening to your friend at that moment.

“We don’t know where Yunho is.” Yeosang frowned. You felt helpless, and being bound to Yeosang, he began to feel it too.

“Sorry for the delay.” Wooyoung entered, out of breath as if he ran to get to you.

“They took for-fucking-ever.” Wooyoung had the same outline of ash and flames as Yeosang.

Every angel was unique, but every demon was the same.

Equal.

“Yunho. Wooyoung, where is Yunho?” Your voice was desperate in the words you spoke.

“He’s close,” Wooyoung answered, leading the way. Wooyoung winced and groaned with every step, now knowing the excruciating pain Yeosang felt when he was a certain distance from you.

A pain Yeosang understood all too well.

“I thought you said he was close.” Yeosang jogged beside Wooyoung. Wooyoung stopped and doubled over in pain.

“Everyone in. Yunho won’t mind, right?” You opened the driver's side of Yunho’s car and began to hot-wire it, failing to find the keys. Mingi shrugged, “he might mind you hot-wiring it.”

You successfully started the car up as Yeosang helped Wooyoung into the back seat while Mingi sat shotgun in the passenger seat.

“Where to?” You asked, peeling out of Yunho’s driveway. Wooyoung pointed a shaking finger at the street ahead.

You sped up, wondering why Wooyoung was in so much pain. That was a question you’d have to ask later.

The more you drove, the less Wooyoung felt as if he were being ripped apart. Yeosang kept an eye out, sensing danger.

“Here! That building!” Wooyoung pointed straight ahead. You came to a stop, freezing.

This was where you lost your loved ones all those years ago.

That same building, the paint peeling, the rusted door hinges, broken windows, and memories you couldn’t erase.

Yeosang wanted to shield you from it all, but he knew your determination wouldn’t allow him.

You were the first one out of the vehicle, Mingi being the second. Yeosang and Wooyoung followed before you two got hurt.

“Stay behind us, you can die. We can’t.” Yeosang instructed. You smiled, the helpless feeling fading and telling you indirectly, everything would be alright.

You would end this.

Wooyoung took the lead, sourcing Yunho out and finding him tied to a pillar. When the four of you entered altogether, the lights came on and you were all surrounded by the people of your enemy.

Some from before, and some new. But they all are against you. Yunho met your eyes.

He felt relief. Someone came for him after all. But it was short-lived, and he began to wish you or Mingi had never come.

Yeosang and Wooyoung guarded you and Mingi with their eternal lives, making sure no one came near you two. Wooyoung even kept an eye on Yunho, his soul being bound to him and all.

“Y/N. You showed.”

“Let Yunho go. It’s me you want!” You scowled, glaring at the man you called your enemy. He let out a dry laugh, standing beside Yunho.

“I know another way to hurt you.”

He had a gun, waving it around and threatening Yunho with it. It worried and angered you. The fear of losing another person weighed down on you more and more.

But while he had a gun, you had Wooyoung and Yeosang.

They weren’t here to be toyed with.

“If you touch him, I swear to god.” You clenched your teeth, fear evident in your voice.

Looking at Yunho, you saw how calm he was. He didn’t show fear despite the situation. All he wanted was for you and Mingi to be okay in the end.

“Y/N, get back.” Wooyoung grew impatient, charging at the speed of light, and disarmed the man that threatened Yunho. You and Mingi readied the weapons you two had brought along, though both of you were taken by surprise at what had just happened.

Wooyoung protected Yunho as the attack had set everyone else off into a battle.

Yeosang tried his best to protect you and Mingi, delighted to see how well you two held your own. Even Mingi, who claimed he didn’t know how to fight.

Yeosang sensed the danger. He always had, like an eerie premonition. He knew there was a chance you could get hurt at that exact moment.

He saw your enemy, the man who took so much from you, charge towards you when you were preoccupied trying not to get hit by the end of a bat or fist or whatever blunt object that was about seconds from connecting to your head and body.

It was a blur, really. You saw yourself about to be lunged at and suddenly you weren’t.

Your enemy had a crew, but you had two demons outcasted by their gods and goddesses.

Need there be any more of an explanation?

Two years had passed. Almost.

One more day and then it would be two years. Everything was okay again. You were no longer in constant danger, your enemies had been eliminated.

Yunho and Mingi were safe. Wooyoung and Yeosang were the kindest, angelic-like demons.

You, well, you finally began to learn how to live again. Yeosang, Yunho, Mingi, and occasionally Wooyoung were all by your side through it all.

You learned why Wooyoung felt so much pain back then when he was too far from Yunho. You learned that Yeosang had also felt that same excruciating pain.

You two were inseparable.

He treated you right, better than anyone you’ve ever been with, despite being a demon.

As unrequited as it felt, you loved him. He saved your life, what was left of who you called ‘family’, and you saved him, in some unknown way.

Yeosang was acting strange. He still took care of you, made sure there was food on the table, he did everything for you. A gentleman.

Until the end.

He dreaded the end. According to Wooyoung’s information, Hongjoong and Seonghwa’s confirmations, and your state lately, he dreaded the end.

One more day with you. However many hours you had left, he didn’t know. Wooyoung didn’t remember. Any information he absorbed from you, he no longer had access to.

Yeosang wasn’t the one who hacked a database. It seemed unfortunate at that moment. He never told you, though. Yeosang didn’t want to scare you any more than he already had to on occasion.

Yeosang tried his best not to let you know, given that you share each other's feelings.

“Tell me why you are radiating sadness.” You confronted. Yeosang forced out a laugh.

“What?”

“I know you’re sad, but what about? You can tell me, you know.”

Yeosang just smiled and you could feel his heart aching as if it were your own.

“I won’t be here forever. Who knows when I will see you again anyways.” You sighed, slowly putting a hand to your chest to soothe the shared ache you just felt. “Just know it will hurt when I’m gone and you didn’t tell me everything.”

You were only concerned about him. Despite him being a demon and semi-immortal, you still wanted to take care of him and help him the way he did for you.

“If it hurts, I will let it hurt. If it takes us years or centuries to meet again, I will wait.” Yeosang spoke, a slight crack in his voice when he did.

“Anything I don’t tell you now, I will tell you in your next life. And your next, and the one after that one. I won’t forget.”

“That’s so romantic… For a demon.” You placed a kiss on his cheek. “But you are kind of scaring me with all of this talk, so spill.”

Yeosang insisted nothing was wrong, even trying to hide his hurt from you somehow. He dreaded the end so much.

But he loved every second he was with you.

Time of death, 10:24.

The metal blade scraped across the dark red rock, marking another tally.

182,625.

Or, as Yeosang saw it, five hundred years.

All spent without you.

“Yeosang! It’s demon title day!” San startled Yeosang out of the gloomy state he was in as he stared at the new tally mark he carved.

“Let me guess, you’re volunteering again?” Yeosang tried to hide the fact that he wanted nothing more than to cry, impatient that he spent five entire centuries without meeting you.

Yeosang promised you he would wait, no matter how long it took, and he would keep his word no matter what.

“Nope. But you are!” San grinned cheekily. Yeosang frowned, closing the blade inside its shell.

“What?”

San grabbed Yeosang by the back of his neck and led him to the demon fair, where Yeosang had become a demon centuries ago. Yeosang squirmed out of his grip but continued to follow him.

Especially now that he was volunteered and that was one thing, if not the only thing, a demon could not get out of.

“What did I do to be volunteered?” Yeosang walked with San, who guided him to table 8.

“Nothing. I just volunteered you.” San pats his back. Yeosang sighed, sitting down.

“Meet the new demons.” San stuck around as the line of new demons began to walk through toward their tables.

Yeosang looked over at another table, seeing Wooyoung, who San had also volunteered without asking.

Wooyoung waved towards Yeosang but looked about as pleased with being volunteered as he was.

Yeosang looked towards one of the new demons that walked through the gates he’d once walked through.

Yunho.

Yunho walked towards Wooyoung’s table before he realized who he was. Yeosang watched as the two stared at each other in shock.

And he smiled. Yunho looked at Yeosang, who Wooyoung had pointed out, and was greeted with a wave.

Yeosang handed many new demons their designated titles. Guardian demons, reapers under Seonghwa’s division, guards, or demons like San who didn’t have a title- Citizens, San once referred to demons like him-.

He watched the entrance, and a sense of longing took over. If Yunho came, where are you?

That’s when his question was answered. All five hundred years of missing you, yearning for you, wishing you weren’t a mortal- All over.

“Aw, you look like you’ve never seen a demon before.”

Yeosang covered his mouth, pleasantly surprised. Then he pulled you into a tight embrace that he had longed for centuries to do.

“Holy shit.”

Yeosang quickly pulled away as a guard began to look in your direction. He cleared his throat and handed you your designated title.

“Cool. I’m a-“

“Citizen. San calls them citizens.” Yeosang couldn’t contain the emotions he felt- all of which were happy and positive emotions.

“Sweet?”

“Sweet.” Yeosang smiled. “We’ll be able to see each other more this way.”

You hugged him again. “Did you see Yunho?”

“Yes.”

“And that Mingi was promoted as a guardian angel?” You added. Yeosang shook his head.

“Yeah. Crazy how that works.” You chuckled, seeing Yunho and Wooyoung catching up after centuries of a long overdue conversation.

You looked at San, who knew all along that you’d be arriving as a demon. And Yunho too.

“Isn’t volunteering awesome?” San spoke up, jokingly. Yeosang rolled his eyes before sitting down again.

“I will catch you later. I need to finish giving demons their titles.”

You bent down to leave a kiss on his forehead before you left him alone, but he had looked up at the same time, causing your lips to meet instead.

Then you felt the memories you two had, the spark you two had, and the connection you shared five hundred years ago all come back in a flash.

“I will wait for you.”

[voidthewanderer]

INQUIRING MINDS WISH TO KNOW——>

For the OC Ask Game! ✨Creating your OCs✨

1, 3, 8, 12, 16 and 19 for Ripper, Shae and Arsenic!!!

:)

Please :))

Pretty please :)))

(Don’t make me whip out my quadruple chin!!!)

@anonwyvern || Questions About Creating Your OCs

Under cut for length; I needed to talk about my babiesss.

What was the first element of your OC that you remember considering (name, appearance, backstory, etc.)? 

Shae: Shae was appearance, though and through. She'd gone through so many changes; species changes as she traveled through fandoms and back and forth between getting pulled from them to be from original concepts. Being online during the massive point online where "Mary Sue bad and you're a terrible person for making them!", she kind of just went onto this backburner with everything; looks, appearance, story, everything.

Ripper: Mostly appearance, but a super loose as hell backstory as well. Rips was originally a Left 4 Dead OC and of a concept that never actually made it to the game at that. Most of what did exist of his backstory was just that he was an asylum escapee who was turned. Rather than the straight jacket being closed up, his arms were free. He's had the most changes over his entire timespan.

Arsenic: Appearance 100%. He actually was originally a concept made by my nephew! He wanted a zombie chef, so I made a zombie chef!

3. How did you choose their name? 

Shae: I honestly don't even remember where her name came from. It wasn't exactly a popular name when I made her, damn probably about seventeen years ago now? Maybe longer, I think.

Ripper: Was originally a sort of punny name. "A scream ripping at one's throat". Where Joseph Trumoil came from, is one of those things that just... happened. Sometimes names just get stuck in my head. I'll quote him directly from the WIP of Chapter 26 of Mnemonic Impressions for why it's still Ripper: "Thanks to my old line of work, if it were humanly possible at that time, I could rip someone apart and know exactly how to do it to cause the most damage; didn’t help I used t’ do some body building. My friends were… fucked up t’ say the least."

Arsenic: I kinda thought it would be funny for an undead, zombie chef to have his name be the same as a poison.

8. What (if anything) do you relate to within their character/story? 

Shae: Let's just say that I am actually very mouthy like Shae it. And, just like with her current situation with Sinjin, I need to learn how to keep my mouth shut so I don't get hurt.

Ripper: There's actually not much story wise I relate to with Rips. If anything, I'm envious of my own character. He's charismatic, charming, his style is impeccable. I guess he did get a lot of my "do no harm, but take no shit" personality.

Arsenic: The cooking! Arsenic is literally probably the person I would become (sans the murders) if I actually stayed in the food service industry.

12. What have you found to be most difficult about creating art for your OC (any form of art: writing, drawing, edits, etc.)? 

Shae: It's actually been difficult to keep her silver tongued, combative, defiant, but also keeping her... alive. In all honesty, she would probably be dead by now if I didn't mellow her out a bit. She's legit supposed to be as vile as Sinjin is, cutting some completely reprehensible stuff, but I also know that she would have been long since dead before her story even started.

Ripper: No lie, actually nailing down his official design. Every time I think I have something solid, I go "oh, this would work with him!" and then things would change. Rinse and repeat. Now it's more just trying to nail down exactly who I wanna build his facial structure off of, because William Treat is EXACTLY how he smiles, but I also adore him having sharp features like Dum Dum from Cyberpunk 2077 has. Trying to blend the two together is... fun.

Arsenic: HIS FACE. HIS FUCKING FACE. I DID IT TO MYSELF BUT GOD WHY

16. What is something about your OC can make you cry? 

Shae: Her story. Like, god her story is fucked up and just the fact that so much about her kids was kept from her and knowing everything she's gone through, that she's the way she is through so much tragedy and just out of a necessity to survive.

Ripper: Also his backstory, but also like... this man is such a sweetheart and sensitive. Be it because he's just being so goddamn cute or because he's going through an existential crisis, he's probably gonna say something that would either turn me into a mushy mess or bawling my eyes out because why did I hurt you this much.

Arsenic: There's two things with him. When he lets his walls down and lets people in, showing that he's not just a hardened ghoul who hates everything around him. Also, if anything were to happen to Crow, this man's heart would absolutely shatter and he'd probably lose his goddamn mind. That sort of mental torment of feeling like he's lost his soul mate, knowing how he'd react to it, especially now with them in his life again.

19. What is your favorite fact about your OC?

Shae: Not so much of a fact of the character itself (because imho anything I really say with her will give away parts of Addicted), but the fact that she's the second OC I've ever created! She's my second oldest OC, being seventeen (plus) years old.

Ripper: He's only second generation American born in his family! His parents are the first born, his grandmother is from Palermo, his grandfather from Verona.

Arsenic: No matter what, Arsenic was meant to cook and I don't mean that just by his concept alone. He's someone who would be considered to have a natural born talent for what he does and I genuinely cannot think of anything else I would have ever even considered putting him in. If it wasn't a chef, it would've been a cafe owner.

[akinomorie]

Black Sea

Author: Technicolour (Lirriel)

Summary:

A series of vignettes focusing on Atsushi - picked up by Mori and trained from a young age to be used as a tool. He's used to shackles, but he begins to seek freedom after meeting Dazai, an orphan eager to die. Alternatively: What if Atsushi and Dazai had been raised in the other's circumstances?

Relationship: Dazai Osamu/Nakajima Atsushi (Dazatsu)

Review:

• I'm absolutely in love with this fic. I've been rereading this tons of times already, analysing every sentence and theorising on the untold stories behind the words carefully left vague. This oneshot has so much potential I feel so inspired 😳✨

• I love the relationships between Atsushi and the PM members here. Mori is the horrible abusive adoptive father yet the one who saved Atsushi from his hell of the orphanage. Chuuya is still the same confident handsome bastard that I love in the canonverse, but with Atsushi as his partner he is gentler, calmer. And the Akutagawa siblings, who Atsushi cares for and grow to adore Atsushi in their own ways, really does weird things to my heart.

• The theme of this fic is freedom, which at first Atsushi didn't have because he was caged by the previous boss with a collar and later chained with thousands of ties to the Mafia by Mori, Chuuya, the Akutagawa siblings. His first meeting with one Dazai Osamu and many others later slowly change that. Personally I find the idea of relationship ties to be tragically romantic hhhhh.

• Atsushi's kindness. It is his kindness that leads to the, may I say, naive stubborn desire against killing, which Mori indulges, Chuuya sympathizes, and the Akutagawa siblings admire. Maybe I interpreted the lines wrong, or maybe I was right, but the PM members really try hard to protect this little hope of innocence that Atsushi holds, using their own twisted methods, despite how utterly foolish that hope is. Reminds me of the reasons why I fell in love with canon!Atsushi in the first place.

• Dazatsu's first meeting. I love the way Atsushi demands Dazai's will to live in exchange for the money, food and accommodation that he promises to provide. Really in character with Atsushi's love for life, both in this fic and the canon verse.

• Chuuya's gifts to Atsushi (and they are all expensive). Atsushi takes care of Chuuya when they go drinking. The two young boy comfort each other in the event of the trauma of their job.

• Akutagawa Ryuunosuke, calling Atsushi, "Atsushi-san" 😳😳😳 I also get this hunch quite often, that Akutagawa in this au is eager to kill because he wants to honor Atsushi's wish not to kill.

• Dazai's panic at seeing Atsushi's tears. Holy moly I felt like something in me was awakened when reading that part. Definitely one of my dazatsu favorite tropes.

• Atsushi! Smoking! (audible gasp)

• Dazai lit Atsushi's cigarettes 🤤 I want a cigarette kiss 🚬💋😉😘

• This fic was written back in 2017. The author admitted that they only read the manga and didn't know LN was a thing when they wrote it, which is why some details may seem out of place if you think about it. Personally I find this drawback to be quite appealing instead. I like to imagine how the other pieces of the BSD canonverse can fit into this au: Did Atsushi know about Yosano (because, Mori)? What would Fyodor do knowing Atsushi was the fearsome Beast of Calamity of the PM? How did Atsushi and Chuuya's first meeting go? How could Atsushi help dealing with Chuuya's Corruption power and Arahabaki? Where were Oda and Ango? How about Kyouka? So many questions, so many ideas...

Quotes:

*

“I’m never killing again.”

He doesn’t know where the sudden conviction comes from; he just knows that it bubbles and burns in his throat. The tiger paces inside his ribcage, making itself known in the ache that pushes up from the inside of his skin, pressing outward.

“What the hell, man.” Chuuya—doesn’t sound as angry as Atsushi would have expected, considering what he just said is tantamount to treason in their circle. Pacifists are dead weight, only good for menial tasks.

*

“I didn’t realize how famous Atsushi-san was,” Dazai says softly. He quirks his eyebrow at Atsushi, playful. “Imagine my surprise when I was being detailed on dangerous Port Mafia members and your name popped up.” He leans close to Atsushi, his breath hot against his skin and adds, “The reported number of deaths was strange, too.”

Atsushi shivers and says, “It’s complicated.”

Dazai shifts, turns his head fully to examine the camera that watches them. After a long pause, he turns back to Atsushi and asks, “Why are you with the Port Mafia, Atsushi-san? Someone like you...” and he pauses, looking down to where their hands are connected. “It just doesn’t make sense,” he says at last.

*

There are shouts, filled with rage and arrogance, as members of whatever organization has been marked for extinction surround him. They catcall and cajole him, laughing at the small, pretty sheep who has strayed from the flock and wandered into a concrete forest filled with wolves.

And always, always, Atsushi smiles mildly at them. Before each raid, he prays quietly for someone to have sense, for someone to escape into the night and not be foolish enough to stand and fight and die.

It is, Atsushi knows, a foolish wish borne from a foolish hope that this shall be the last death he must witness.

*

Dazai’s hand stills, and Atsushi feels his eyes. He continues to eat, quietly, layering the flavors that enter his mouth, trying to build a sensory symphony. “I have nothing to pay you with,” Dazai says, and Atsushi wonders if the lack of betrayal in his voice, the tired resignation, offers a clue.

“No, you do,” Atsushi says. “Something you hold little value in; something I consider to be of great value.”

*

Akutagawa does not quite smile at him – Atsushi does not think he even really knows what a smile is. But he quirks his lips, as if he is sharing something humorous with Atsushi, and Atsushi smiles back weakly.

“Atsushi-san could kill Mori-san and the other executives, and I would still want to follow Atsushi-san.” Akutagawa pauses, swallowing. And then he says, “Because Atsushi-san saved us… Our lives belong to you, Atsushi-san.”

Something weighty settles in the pit of Atsushi’s stomach, and he breathes out a hummingbird’s sigh. Akutagawa, he thinks, is so incredibly earnest. The obvious adoration in his voice makes Atsushi’s heart hurt.

*

We are only children, Atsushi thinks, as Chuuya lurches toward him with another sob, wrapping his arms around Atsushi’s neck. It is easier for him, like this – when Atsushi is in his tiger form, large enough that his bulk takes up almost the entire available space, with Chuuya curled into his belly.

He doubts Chuuya would treat his human form like this.

The tiger blinks, sharing its body with Atsushi, and chuffs softly at Chuuya, nudging at his head. It only succeeds in knocking his hat off. Tigers cannot purr, their vocal cords are not designed for it, but Atsushi tries to convey comfort in other ways. It is the only thing he can do.

It is his fault Chuuya is this way.

*

“Dazai-kun is incredibly kind,” Atsushi says.

There is a shadow of melancholy to Dazai’s face as he smiles and says softly, “No, but Atsushi-san is kind to think so.” He lets Atsushi eat a few more bites before asking tentatively, “Would you like me to leave?”

“No,” Atsushi answers immediately, and is surprised to find that it’s true. “I’d appreciate your company, if you have nothing else to do.”

“Never,” Dazai says. He smiles, and there is a gentleness to his expression that fills Atsushi with warmth.

*

“It was my home.” The “was” is weighty; there’s a finality to the words, and suddenly Atsushi sees what the tiger has seen all along, has known ever since that day by the river. There is a peace that comes from this knowledge, and he smiles at Dazai, trusting him to see what Atsushi saw. “But home is someplace different now.”

“I understand,” Dazai says. And he smiles back, a soft curve that dimples one cheek and makes his eyes shine like stars in the dark of night.

[baekhvuns]

Tbh I expected it I'm either very lucky or very unlucky in life, there's no in betweenen 🤡 I was hoping for January or late March/April dates, BUT NO, FUCKING FEBRUARY OFC. I HATE YOU KQ. And I bet they're gonna add more dates in London, Berlin, maybe Paris. My trip has already been postponed 4 times, I gotta go eventually... if everything goes well I'll be back in SK in June/July, bet they'll be in the US then 🔫 honestly I'm so pissed, I don't even wanna see any concert footage, idc.

I'M APPALLED WHAT POSITIONS GUIDE?! Poor avo...... but maybe uni AU with some avocado statue action should happen in one of your fics

Famous GOMs in a nutshell, that's why we started organising our own, cause fuck off. It's not even just about winning fan calls, but I don't want to give those bitches more chances they don't deserve it

Omfg, not My Little Prince I meant My Little Monster 💀 SNAFU's issue for me is... it's too long and has unlikeable characters, it's just annoying as hell. I remember Negima but at what cost... School Days YES IT'S SO BAD

Damn, I have my other faves in the Harem, because I'm still not sure if mister knight is up to something or not, but I guess them being the endgame would make sense. Klein my himbo <3 gonna read it so we can discuss

Cristiano you fucking fool 🤡 now I have no idea who's gonna win this shitshow

Since Seonghwa will be away he lost his chance, I'll marry Soohyuk in February in Korea, you're welcomed to attend <3

Finals in December, really?! Foul. 💀

Btw white shitty guys, Alaric from TVD is one too He even blocked Paul afterwards 😭 aaaaand that bitch played Elle's asshole ex in Legally Blonde, everything makes sense

Bestie I wouldn't survive Hwa rn, and clearly I won't even get a chance so aihdjashskieshkajsjssh maybe it's for the best. But I can't lie, I would love to die because of him. Now I hope he's not gonna keep his blonde hair for Europe, he should go bald

Hair makes kpop - now this is the quote 😂 you're right

Baek running away and breaking world's records jadhaisahahssha you should've been a part of the relay on Kingdom

I don't know I could never vibe with SuperM's music, I tried but it was always lackluster and I was so disappointed, it all sounded like it was catered towards NCT fans 😭😭😭😭 but if they came near me I would definitely see them (they won't)

Omg this is terrible and there are people who love snow?! That's what I'm fucking saying, it's insane! It's been snowing here as well, I was so happy the snow has melted, but it's here AGAIN. Not as bad as in Canada ofc, but even 10 snowflakes are too many

People are so vile and cynical, Hyuna and Dawn were together for years, so no it wasn't pointless. Yeah, this is fucked up

So maths, chemistry, physics, logic I was notoriously bad <3 you were feeling Fearless I guess huh? I don't use Spotify regularly, so I'm excluded from wrapped. But I checked YT and my top song is Knock Down by Xdinary Heroes

I played hockey in the past, my thoughts are: I could beat hockey player San

Aahhh Ouran quiz ok this is somewhat true actually

Lmao models? Ha ha ha ha right......

This thread, stop I can't 😭

Cathwa forever 😻 - DV 💖

hi hello!!!

Tbh I expected it I'm either very lucky or very unlucky in life, there's no in betweenen 🤡 I was hoping for January or late March/April dates, BUT NO, FUCKING FEBRUARY OFC. I HATE YOU KQ. And I bet they're gonna add more dates in London, Berlin, maybe Paris. My trip has already been postponed 4 times, I gotta go eventually... if everything goes well I'll be back in SK in June/July, bet they'll be in the US then 🔫 honestly I'm so pissed, I don't even wanna see any concert footage, idc.

NAURRR THIS ISNT FAIR 😭😭😭 DBWKDJWKDHWK RIGHT IN THE FEBRUARY PLS OUT OF EVERY MONTH TOO ON VALENTINES AT BERLIN COMEONNNN,, maybe the cb season will be june/july! u can see them then 😭😭😭 WHAT TIME ARE U LEAVING (if u leave like mid feb, so like around feb 15 what if u take the last min flight to whatever place theyre concerting at and attend the show AND then go to ur trip??) CAN THE TRIP BE CUT SHORT SO U CAN ATTEND 😭😭😭 the last part was me during the can concert 😭😭

I'M APPALLED WHAT POSITIONS GUIDE?! Poor avo...... but maybe uni AU with some avocado statue action should happen in one of your fics

IM NOT EVEN KIDDING THE SCHOOL NEWS PUBLISHED ABT IT FBDB 😭😭 SICK ATROCIOUS FBWNDHS ur betting im mentioning the avocado, have a san junior hockey player fic <33 fbwmdhwk

Famous GOMs in a nutshell, that's why we started organising our own, cause fuck off. It's not even just about winning fan calls, but I don't want to give those bitches more chances they don't deserve it

no bc that so??? id sue bc damn iM giving all my earrings for YOU to go on a fansign without even giving the albums???? 🔫🔫 NAAAAH THIS IS SO WACK

Omfg, not My Little Prince I meant My Little Monster 💀 SNAFU's issue for me is... it's too long and has unlikeable characters, it's just annoying as hell. I remember Negima but at what cost... School Days YES IT'S SO BAD

WAIT I JUST SAW THE REVIEWS OF MY LITTLE MONSTER WHATS SO BAD ABT IT 😭😭😭,,, AAAAAA TOO LONG tbh it do he looking good dbdb but maybe the unlike able character will break it for me,,, HRKWHDKW STOP BC NEGIMA WAS SO WEIRD 😭😭 I STILL QUESTION MYSELF ON WHY I WATCHED IT FBFB no buts the way there aren’t any good shoujo animes after the older ones,,,like something like the patisserie show, usui or even the fantasy ones! need that era back so bad STOP DO U RMR PRETTY RYTHM AURORA DREAM BC THAT WAS MY PEAK ANIME ERA

Damn, I have my other faves in the Harem, because I'm still not sure if mister knight is up to something or not, but I guess them being the endgame would make sense. Klein my himbo <3 gonna read it so we can discuss

tbh what the maid said to sir sonnaught broke me bc he might never get his chance 😭😭 harem’s plot is thickening but it’s quite boring bc we don’t see a lot of latil and the others,,, KLEIN IS SO FUNNY GBWNFBSK poor guy truly, if in the end either tasir or sonnaught end up with latil ill be so happy <3 AND THE GREAT SAGE??? LMFAOOOO???? THIS GUYS JOKES STRAIGHT JOKES WHEJ I THOUGHT WE COULDN’T GET FUNNIER PERSON THAN KLEIN

Cristiano you fucking fool 🤡 now I have no idea who's gonna win this shitshow

kr and brazil tmr 🧍🏻‍♀️🧍🏻‍♀️ kr truly needs a miracle to win against them dbdb AND neymar PLAYING???? SHIT???? hopefully they make him play in the second half dbdb its over, esp bc they’ll play for pele,, scary hours open for the next few days it’s gonna be so hectic, im gonna be streaming this match so hard anon 😭😭😭 it’ll be unpredictably predictable, who are u taking ur bets on?

Since Seonghwa will be away he lost his chance, I'll marry Soohyuk in February in Korea, you're welcomed to attend <3

BFMQHDKQHDKW HE LOST HIS CHANCE ESP AFTER THE EURO DATES 😭😭 u bet drop me the location and outfit theme im pulling up but it better not be a 30 min ceremony 🔫 a week 🔫

Finals in December, really?! Foul. 💀

YEAH 😭😭😭 BACK TO BACK TOO DBDDB

Btw white shitty guys, Alaric from TVD is one too He even blocked Paul afterwards 😭 aaaaand that bitch played Elle's asshole ex in Legally Blonde, everything makes sense

im so appalled actually

Bestie I wouldn't survive Hwa rn, and clearly I won't even get a chance so aihdjashskieshkajsjssh maybe it's for the best. But I can't lie, I would love to die because of him. Now I hope he's not gonna keep his blonde hair for Europe, he should go bald

LMFAOOOO 😭😭😭 no bc if u don’t get to witness blond hwa, he needs do due his asap them, BECAUSE NO WAY IS HE GONNA PULL UP TO EURO WITH THAT MALFOY HAIR AND UR NOT PRESENT 🤚🏼🔫

Hair makes kpop - now this is the quote 😂 you're right

exactly!! the crazier the hair, the brighter it is, it makes the kpop tier <3

Baek running away and breaking world's records jadhaisahahssha you should've been a part of the relay on Kingdom

FBAMDHWKDJWK SUDDENLY MINHO BECAME MY SPIRIT ANIMAL IN A DREAMFHWJBD,,, LMFAOOO GIVING WOOYOUNG A RUN FOR HIS MONEY

I don't know I could never vibe with SuperM's music, I tried but it was always lackluster and I was so disappointed, it all sounded like it was catered towards NCT fans 😭😭😭😭 but if they came near me I would definitely see them (they won't)

AHHH UR RIGHT it def was very nct centered,, but tiger inside felt like shinee exo and nct (but only in the vv last part) mix,, I THINK IT WAS TBH waiting for them to add changmin in it for the spice,,, best superm song was i wish u were here 🤚🏼 baekhyun CARRIED THAT song,, i hope they do!!!!! pls flaw lots of taemin pics and maybe that devil (kai) and incarnation’s too <3

Omg this is terrible and there are people who love snow?! That's what I'm fucking saying, it's insane! It's been snowing here as well, I was so happy the snow has melted, but it's here AGAIN. Not as bad as in Canada ofc, but even 10 snowflakes are too many

YEAH ITS SO TERRIBLE THERES WALLS OF SNOW PILLED UP its pretty but from afar and sO cold! pls pray it cancels my final <3 10 SNOWFLAKES ARE TOO MANY FBWND 😭😭 don’t slip and fall bestie!! bring out the chonky boots

People are so vile and cynical, Hyuna and Dawn were together for years, so no it wasn't pointless. Yeah, this is fucked up

yo literally??? like whole video essay’s on them and speculating what they went thru?? 😭🤚🏼 like if they announce they went back again suddenly everyone will be like “I KNEW IT!”

So maths, chemistry, physics, logic I was notoriously bad <3 you were feeling Fearless I guess huh? I don't use Spotify regularly, so I'm excluded from wrapped. But I checked YT and my top song is Knock Down by Xdinary Heroes

FBWMDHWKHDWK HES ON HIS WAY RIGHT NOW TO TEACH U, SOON TO BE UR FAV MATH NERD <33 ur tutor in question, was feeling so fearless for huh yunjin, hot take but she really, REALLY reminds me of krystal 🧍🏻‍♀️ANON U HAVE TASTE BC THAT SONG IS A BANGER very villain esque i must say 👀

I played hockey in the past, my thoughts are: I could beat hockey player San

BDMWFHWKH ur cameo in the fic confirmed, san’s rival from a different school <3! about to beat his ass, id pay money for this and yn will cheer for u and only u

Aahhh Ouran quiz ok this is somewhat true actually

i actually got the same one! setting us up fr, so here’s one more to celebrate it fbfb

Lmao models? Ha ha ha ha right......

NOT SEONGHWA FUCKIKG HOPPINGNFBFBF,,, to be that parent and go home to their s/o and not see hwa must be disappointing

This thread, stop I can't 😭 /// Cathwa forever 😻 - DV 💖

STOPPP THEYRE SO CUTE 😭😭😭 ADOPTING EACH OFHER FUCK OFF THIS IS SO PURE,, he is a furry. its in his dna atp.

also,,

AND?? AND WE COULD’VE GOTTEN HER?????? FUCK???

😭😭🤚🏼 not him walking past THE naomi campbell

a sign for u to read model hwa bc this is exactly the elevator scene

THIS ENTIRE THREAD?????? AND THIS its SO tempting to buy the album 🙂🙂

[dees-writing-corner]

three calls answered; one call missed - first call

pairing: wooyoung x fem!reader; ? x fem!reader

genre: angst

warnings: alcohol consumption

word count: 2075

a/n I'm gonna send this out in parts because I'm not really sure if I like having these long 5k+ oneshots on my page. may combine them together later on if I change my mind <3

ALSO, GUESS WHO'S OUT OF TUMBLR PRISON 🎊🎉

main masterlist

It's about 11.30 in the evening and Yeosang and I were in my living room, bingeing 'Peaky Blinders'. He came over earlier this afternoon because he said, and I quote, ' I need to get away from all of the chaos Wooyoung is making at home'.  

"I don't know why you like him. I mean, what do you see in him?"  

Yeosang sat back down on the couch, handing me a mug.  

"Yeo, you're talking about someone you've known for 8 years here. He's literally your roommate slash best friend."  

"Exactly why I want to know what you see in him. I've lived with him for 4 years and he has a different girl in his bed every weekend. I mean, I love Wooyoung, I really do, but the dude does not have a good reputation with girls."  

"Look," I shifted so that I was facing Yeosang instead of the TV, "If I could control my feelings, I would. However, I can't, which means I have to live with it until my body decides to like someone else."  

"How about San?"  

"What?"  

"San, you know? My other roommate? The one that -"  

Furrowing my brows, I cut Yeosang off, "I know who San is. What about him?"  

"How about liking him instead? You've known the two for the same amount of time, and they're always attached at the hip. Maybe you actually like San. Plus, I'm pretty sure he likes you."   

"Okay, first off, San definitely doesn't like me like that. Second off, stop talking about this. Nothing's gonna come out of it anyways. We'll just be friends."  

Raising his hands in surrender, "Okay, no need to get worked up over -"  

Yeosang was cut off by the sound of my phone ringing. Frowning, I looked around for my phone.   

"Who is calling you at midnight?"  

Yeosang looked around for my phone.  

"How the hell would I know? Now, where's my phone?"  

Yeosang shifted in his seat before pausing, "You know what? I think I'm sitting on it."  

Standing up, Yeosang took the phone that was under him and handed it to me.   

Furrowing my brows, I looked towards Yeosang, "Uh, why is your roommate calling me?" 

"What?" Yeosang leaned in closer to look at my phone. 

Answering the call, I brought the phone up to my ear with Yeosang pressing against me, trying to listen in. 

"Wooyoung? What's up?" 

Hearing music from the other side, I took a glance at Yeosang. 

Was he at a bar? 

"Hey, are you there?" 

Just as I was about to hang up, a voice came through. 

"Hello? Is this Y/N?" 

Double checking the caller ID, I brought the phone back to my ear. 

"It is, yes." 

"I'm a bartender at Moon Club. The gentleman has had a lot to drink. Could you come pick him up?" 

Sharing a look with Yeosang, "Um, yeah. I'll be there in about 20 minutes." 

Hanging up the phone, I just looked at Yeosang. 

"Why the hell did they call me? Don't they normally call the person you mumble or the last person you called or something?" 

Shrugging, Yeosang made himself comfortable, "I don't know, I also don't care. Now, off you go. You said you'd be there in 20."  

Blinking, I looked back at him, "You're not coming?" 

"No, thank you. I've done it enough times. You can do it. Oh, and remember to make sure he changes before bed." 

Dumfounded, I stared at him before sighing and grabbing my car keys. 

"And whatever you do! Do NOT sleep with him!" 

Closing the door behind me, I made my way to the car before driving to the club. 

The drive there was quick. Probably because of how late it was.  

Entering the club, I was hit by the sound of a strong bass and the smell of a mixture of perfumes and alcohol.  

Quickly making my way to the bar, I saw Wooyoung laying his head down on his arm as a bartender handed him a glass of water. Slipping my way through the crowd, I reached Wooyoung.  

"Wooyoung."  

Lifting his head, Wooyoung looked at me with hazy eyes, pausing as his brain registered who I was.  

"Y/N-ahhhhh!"  

Wooyoung got up from the stool, stumbling over his feet as he did so.

Grabbing a hold of his arm, I made sure he was steady before turning to the bartender.  

"Has he paid for his drinks yet, or?"  

"You're good. The drinks are already paid for."  

Nodding, I led Wooyoung out of the club and into the car.  

"Okay, let's get you home."  

Starting the car, I pulled out of the car park.  

"Hmmm, churinaaaa."  

Hearing Wooyoung mumble something, I glanced at him.  

"What?"  

Not hearing him respond, I simply shrugged it off and carried on driving.  

Guiding Wooyoung to their flat, I leaned him against the wall by the door.  

Ringing the bell, I waited a few seconds for San to open the door. Hearing no movement on the other side, I realised he must've been out.  

"Wooyoung, hey," Patting him on the cheek, I tried to get him to look at me.  

"Wha -?"  

Lifting his head, Wooyoung looked at me.  

"Where are your keys?"  

He just stood there before slumping against the wall again.  

Pinching the bridge of my nose, I debated on whether or not I should just leave him in the corridor for the night. Because this is not how I expected my Friday night/Saturday morning to be.  

Sighing, I reached a hand out, running it over his jean pockets, successfully locating his keys in the right front pocket on the first try.

Fishing them out, I opened the door before helping Wooyoung inside.

Kicking the door shut, I guided Wooyoung into his room, throwing him onto the bed before going to the kitchen.  

Filling a glass with water, I went through some of their cabinets for some ibuprofen. Once I got everything, I walked back to his room, only to find him sitting up, looking at the door.  

Placing the water and tablets on the nightstand, I turned to Wooyoung.  

"Come on, get ready for bed."  

Helping him out of his shoes and shirt, I tried to get him to lie down.  

"Dude, as much as I like you, I'm not taking your jeans off. You either go to sleep like this or take them off yourself."  

Sighing, I turned around to get my phone, wanting to call Yeosang to come back, but found myself being tugged into open arms.  

"Stay."  

Blinking, I was confused, "What?"  

Furrowing my brows, I turned my head to the side. Trying to get out of his arms.  

Wooyoung had his buried against the side of my neck, "Jaein, stay. Please."  

Rolling my eyes, I struggled out of his arms.  

"Wooyoung. I'm Y/N. Not Jaein. Now go to sleep. You're drunk."  

Ignoring the twist in my stomach, I tried to dodge his hands.   

And I failed.  

His hands went straight to the sides of my face and pulled me in. The second I felt his lips on mine, my mind went blank. I didn't know what to do.  

Feeling him move one of his hands to my waist snapped me out of my trance.  

Pushing him with all of my strength, I watched as he fell onto the bed behind him, before leaving. Trying to keep all emotions at bay.  

This was not what I wanted.  

Wiping my mouth, I grabbed my keys and phone by the door and left the flat.  

"Y/N?"  

Looking up, I saw San come out of the lift, confused.  

"What are you doing here?"  

Schooling my face into a smile, "Oh! Wooyoung was drunk and the bartender called me to get him. He's inside right now. Can you handle him?"  

"Yeah, no, sure. You head back home. I'll deal with him."  

Smiling I hugged San before rushing into the lift.  

Once I was in my car, I sat in the dark for a while. Collecting my thoughts.  

Jaein. The first and only girl Wooyoung loved. They dated for 3 years in high school and later went to different universities. They broke up because he found her cheating on him when he wanted to surprise her. After that, Wooyoung didn’t care for relationships. He simply slept around.  

Laughing at myself. I realised why Wooyoung was actually friends with me. I remember how surprised Yeosang had been when Wooyoung said that we were friends because he told me that Wooyoung didn't have any female friends.  

Ignoring all of the pain I was feeling, I now knew that Wooyoung didn't see me as a friend. He saw me as a stand-in for his ex-girlfriend.

Closing my eyes, I took a couple of deep breaths before pulling out of the car park.  

By the time I got home, it was already 1.30 in the morning.  

"You're back! Finally! What took you so long?"  

Walking into the living room, I saw Yeosang give me a once over before he frowned and pulled me down next to him.  

"What happened? You didn't sleep with him, right? I warned you -"  

"I didn't sleep with him."  

Leaning into him, I let Yeosang wrap his arms around me.  

"Wooyoung called me Jaein. "  

"What?"  

"He called me Jaein. Which means, deep down, or maybe not so deep down, Wooyoung sees me as a substitute, a stand-in for his ex-girlfriend. Oh, he kissed me as well. Thinking I was her." 

There was a pause before Yeosang said anything.  

"I'm sorry."  

Breathing out a laugh, I turned my head to look at a picture I had next to the couch. The picture was taken on Halloween last year. We all decided to stay in that year and just watch horror films as we drank and talked. In the picture, Yeosang and San were standing behind me, smiles on both their faces as they held up their beers. Wooyoung was sitting next to me, an arm around my shoulder, and his cheek pressed against mine. That was actually one of the best nights I ever had with them.  

"Y'know, I would've preferred if Wooyoung rejected me, because knowing that he sees me as Jaein hurts way more."  

Sitting there, we both stared at the tv screen. Our minds miles away.  

-1 week later- 

Standing in front of Yeosang's flat, I hovered my hand on the doorbell, wondering why the hell I was there. 

San invited me over for a Marvel movie marathon and couldn't say no because as much as I wanted to, San didn't do anything. 

Taking a deep breath, I rang the doorbell, though I quickly regretted it a few moments later. 

"Hey." 

Feeling my breath get caught in my throat, I watched as Wooyoung opened up the door to let me in. A warm smile on his face. 

Forcing a small smile onto my face, I entered, "Hi." 

Placing my bag by the door, I went into the living room, trying to find San. 

"San's in the kitchen making the popcorn. So, just make yourself comfortable on the couch." 

Sitting on the couch, I unfolded one of the throws and threw it over myself. 

"So," Wooyoung sat down on the opposite end of the couch, looking at me, "Are you and San dating?" 

"No." San came out of the kitchen, placing the bowl of popcorn on the coffee table before he started to set up the TV. 

"Just friends." 

Wooyoung nodded slightly before clearing his throat, "So, um, San told me that you picked me up last Friday? I didn't do anything, right?" 

Glancing at San, I saw him look back at me. 

You see, San knew I had a crush on Wooyoung from the very start, he saw right through me. I didn't even have to tell him. And just like before, San knew something happened last Friday without me having to tell him. It was one of the main reasons I was here. 

"No. You were, good." 

Clapping his hands, Wooyoung got up from the couch, "Right, I'm gonna go now. I have an appointment with Allison." 

San got all of the movies in order and took a seat next to me, "Andrea." 

Nodding his head once, Wooyoung grabbed his keys off the table, "Right, I'll be home tomorrow morning. Bye." 

The second we heard the door click shut, San turned to me. 

"Tell me what happened." 

part 2

[seirindono]

Mermaid/sirens and monster. Please

Also I don’t come empty handed. Prepare for a dozen fic recommendations (all of which I’m in love with) and a brief description. All of these are on Ao3

Roadside attraction by popatochisp. Dinner on the road where a scertain skeleton comes to visit. An underfell Papyrus fic that’s really good.

Your Friendly-Neighborhood Witch by earthvibes. Readers a witch, chaotic and doing work with Greek gods and also came across a skeleton who, upon their meeting, punched her in the face. It was Stretch

Skull Joke by Gotcha. This fic is purely just humor. Not much plot just the lazy brothers doing stand up comedy mentioning reader every once in a while. Had me laughing a lot and is really good.

Poor Little Meow Meow by Mystique. This- THIS! I’ve never liked killer before but hood damnit this does things to me. Killer interacts with a veterinarian MC who is clueless to the danger she’s in. They have kittens. Kittens. Adorable.

The Fulfilling Ordeal of Being Known by nighttimelights . It’s a one shot smut but, ah, Horrortale sans is a girl and I’m questioning me sexuality. It’s damn good and a spin off of a harem series by the same author.

Skeleton Sisters and the Architect. Whooooooooo damn this is good. Fluffy, humorous, probably never going to be updated but for what’s there it’s so good!!

Skeletons Sisters Meet the Landlady by her as well. It’s them again, shot but finished and great.

A Sea of Hope by Aylish91. Pirates and skelly reader. Axe is a simp, they’re out at sea, everything’s great except when it’s not and readers just trying to understand what the hell her body’s about.

To pray on the hunters by periodically_annoying. Pretty good haven’t read it in a while but nice.

Stolen Souls by RubyPasha. It’s a twist on the “reader gets transported to the dating sun with the skelly bros” trope. Except she’s not supposed to be there and it’s a real slow burn. She’s kinda just living her life and trying not to die but also becoming friends and she needs hugs. Lots of hugs.

A spider in a graveyard by the same author. Readers Spider-Man’s student, her versions of the brothers and villains. She fights them, gets sucked into another universe by the machine and stuff happens. What’s nice is it’s a harem but with versions I’ve never read about. Outerfell, farmswap, Lustfell and such.

Hey anon, good timing because I found some naga fics after the post from last time. I Was Going For A Walk One Day by YinYinChan (the Swapfell one, glad I didn't make it up haha). Also, Bear Traps and Snakes by A_Gorgeous_Hobgoblin. I haven't read it yet, though.

As for the mermaid/siren goods, I'll throw in a few names but I'm very much disappointed that you didn't choose my mafia selection sob. Er, some might be spicy… Haven't read them in a while and some I wasn't subscribed to. So, um, read the tags carefully, ok?

.The Mirror Bay Depths by lieleycat, ranger reader meets big scary sea monster husband(s) -I'm… quoting the tags- and fluff ensues

.Flotsam & Jetsam by potatochisp, drabble series, I recall it's pretty cute

.The Danger that Lurks Underwater, A Series of Sinister Drabbles, Cliffside (I made a fanart of it!) by AKA_Indulgence, no summary, just go read it and enjoy the ride

.Shells and Pearls by syst3m_of_3rr0rs and Cold Currents by JacketBones Oof, I… acutally don't remember much of these? But Reader is the siren here, so it's always good for a change.

.Sleepin' with the Fishes by Catsitta, because I'm not the only one willing to mix mobtale with absolutely any other AU.

---

Now, thanks for your selection, anon hehe. They sound like fun, and I actually recognize a few titles (Poor Little Meow Meow, A spider in a graveyard, A Sea of Hope) and names, like potatochisp and... um? @aylish91 ? ∑(°∀°) *slowly connecting the dots* Wait, we were mutuals all this time...??

[bracketsoffear]

The Full, Unabridged Director Oswald Propaganda

[LENGTH AND SPOILER WARNING]

In The Department of Truth, the protagonist’s boss (and director of the titular secret federal department) is a much older Lee Harvey Oswald, though it’s not explicitly known which version of him he is. As in, what story of the assassination is true? Is he the CIA stooge? The innocent patsy? The lone gunman? Our protagonist muses this question in the second issue and can only conclude: “He’s probably not the one killed by Jack Ruby.” And looking at the picture the comic paints of who he is now, he seems much more the type to spend his time in Howard Hunt’s circles than Kerry Thornley’s, if you know what I mean. He has become the image of the perfect Cold War-era fed with his browline glasses, dark suit, quips about a new generation gone soft, and an ever-present cigarette. And that’s because he always has been that. He joined the Department as an agent when he was 19, working to counter the Soviets and gain information on their country’s equivalent of the D.o.T. And we, the reader, do not know what happened on November day in Dallas, but neither does he, it seems. Kennedy stood against the Department and it was his job to take him out, but in that book depository, he saw the Scarlet Woman (a sentient thoughtform who is very personification of violent societal change and conspiracies, her summoning literally bringing about the Cold War itself against the intentions of those who designed the ritual à la the Manhattan Project scientists) holding a sniper rifle, ready to tear apart the country’s sense of truth with a bullet. (Well, three.) But as the story of the assassination spread, so did the idea of Lee Harvey Oswald, the concept of the shadowy assassin that was seen on the front pages—the conflicting theories and paranoias made manifest. To quote Hawk Harrison (another character), “the living embodiment of every horrible thing people think the government is capable of, filled up into a man-shaped thing.” 

And we don’t know which one was saved and which one was killed. And neither does he. He’s left contemplating whether or not he’s truly real or simply another fiction, but at the end of the day, it doesn’t matter. Reality is relative, he’s no less real than this country is. No matter how human he may or may not be, he might as well be American paranoia personified in function. He’s a man desperate to do whatever it takes to uphold the ideal of what America is supposed to be, that Shining City on a Hill; a man fighting in a war of propaganda and information and disinformation, a war of stories and ideas. To quote Indrid Cold, he’s simply a “dream this country is having.” 

For a brief moment though, he tried to escape from what he is in the way so many privileged young people of the 1960s did: growing his hair out and running away to San Francisco in search of drugs, free love, and an answer to his problems and existential malaise. He found the first two, the last is debatable. He finds himself in bed with an unnamed woman with whom he shares his fears about his nonexistence, about the country's nonexistence, only to pull a gun on her when he realizes that she laced his blunt with LSD. ‘Who the hell are you, and who do you work for?’ He asks, pointing the weapon in her face. “Do you know who I am?” She simply answers: “You’re not going to hurt me. I’m just a pawn in a bigger game. A patsy.” She knows. Of course, she does, she’s Company, a CIA agent involved with MKULTA, the agency’s infamous failed attempt at brainwashing its own citizens. “Was it you?” he asks, “Did you pull the trigger?” She tells him that they’re not the ones in control, that “Everyone misses the real conspiracy, don’t they? We’re the little shadow puppets they control. We do what they tell us to do. Some very smart, very dumb people thought they could control what America was without getting blood on their hands. They thought they were storytellers. They thought they were selling Coca-Cola and Chevrolet and hot dogs. They wanted to tell America that “It’s a Wonderful Life,” and they wanted America to believe it. Isn’t that right, Lee? But it’s not a wonderful life. People know that. People don’t want to get along. They want to fuck and feel good and feel righteous. The Department of Truth is selling America its own version of The Truth. Telling everyone Why We Fight. Why We Buy. Why We Believe. But it’s not working, is it? You know it’s not working. You can see the cracks forming all around us. You can see the fracturing. The Counterculture… It’s such a perfect little weapon. These kids think they’re fighting against some big war in Asia, but they’re on the front lines right here in Haight-Ashbury. They eat the lotus flower and they see themselves as little gods, and see their desires as something larger than they are. They sing their little protest songs, but they’ll be voting Republican before their first grays come in. I’m just a pawn. A patsy. I feed the kids the drugs and my bosses tell me that it’s to wash their minds, to see if we can push them, control who they are and what they think. It’s not working… This whole MKULTRA thing… Not how the men in suits want it to work, but me and the kids on the ground, we’ve been seeing it. They do it all on their own. They brainwash themselves. They become rancid, and bloodthirsty, and we have to feed them the blood they want.” 

“I don’t understand,” asks Lee. “Who killed Kennedy?”

 “You’re so fucked up that you can’t even how funny that is…” she continues, “Is it my bosses in Langley? Eisenhower’s military-industrial complex? The big bad commie-hating war machine, not willing to back down in the fight against the hammer and sickle, even if means having to kill our best and brightest? Is it Queen J. Edgar Hoover and his black-suited goon squad terrified that the kids are going to rise up and shoot their parents in their sleep? Is it the Italian mob, and Hoffa, and all their mobsters and teamsters angry that they’re losing their foothold,” No, she says. “It’s the same as it was in ‘63. It wasn’t any of them. It was you. It was me. It was all those kids smoking reefer on the street and thinking about free love. You can’t just tell them that things are going to be better forever like your idiot bosses thought. The kids want to fight for themselves. They want to own it for themselves. You need to let them taste glory.” 

Lee wakes up with a campaign button in his hand: “NIXON’S THE ONE!” The next time we see him, he’s meeting the new president in the oval office, once again wearing a suit with his hair cut short. He has become almost exactly what the unnamed agent described, with one major difference. He succeeds. 

History is, of course, written by the victors, and facts can be rewritten by them as well. After Lee’s “death”, the previous Director (Frank Capra, director of It’s a Wonderful Life) put him in the Department’s archives to try and figure out who the Scarlet Woman was, only for him to use the research to find a new way of doing things, a way to shift reality through manipulating what people believe to be true on a large scale through media, and symbolic imagery, and simple lies that serve to reinforce what the public wants to believe about this country, and for that, Richard Nixon appointed him to the job we know him in, Director of the D.o.T. Director Capra was a naïve idealist who truly believed that the American Dream was not only real but could be achieved through hard work. Lee knows that the American Dream is a lie, but my god, he will do what it takes to make it real, no matter how underhanded the tactics. If you can control the narrative, you can control The Truth. 

For most of his tenure, it was the height of the Cold War, there was a distinct enemy to push against. It was a conflict of countries, of ideologies, of two superpowers trying to keep their way of life at the expense of the other, and it was the U.S. that won out. There is another version of the 20th century, the one that was once real, where the founding ideals of the USSR were much closer to being realized within its border, it was something better than what it became, but the U.S. won the propaganda war and what was once simply a fact had become a hazy fiction that never happened. And so the victor rewrites history. 

And how does one become the victor? Through whatever means necessary, from fabricating events that later became real, to assassinations, to media manipulation, to the creation of the Satanic Panic itself, playing off paranoia and Christian nationalism to strengthen the idea that America is something that exists, that the American Dream is worth fighting for. (And of course, in the case of the latter, to deflect media attention from the whole Iran-Contra Deal.)

And what did this victory get him? A hell of a lot of guilt and a shattered, post-truth society that he’s left trying to clean up the pieces of. The Department is no longer fighting an ideological battle against an equally matched enemy, they’re floundering against the misinformation and conspiracies they once spread, desperately trying to keep reality from falling into the hands of far-right reactionaries using their own methods (and in Lee’s case, his own stories) to try and rewrite reality in their favor. The D.o.T. is rotten to its core, an organization founded to uphold American hegemony, but now, they’re the closest thing to the heroes of this story simply because the other side is so, so much worse. Like Pandora desperately trying to stuff the evils she released back into the box, they’re trying to contain the lies they wrought upon society. 

The phrase “post-truth society” is often thrown around concerning the present political moment, but the comic posits that this isn’t new. There has never been a unified societal truth. But it sure as hell is worse now when any internet fascist can go and rant about whatever fucking bigoted conspiracy they stake their brand on and sway thousands to their side. And we need to fight that at all costs. But preserving the status quo is not the way; I mean, look where trying to do that left us. No, there’s another way. And that’s coming clean about everything. No more secrets, no more attempts to shape the narrative towards your ideal, the public needs to know. (And that’s the power of government transparency and the Fourth Estate, babey!)

Finally, I leave you with this monologue:

“I know you don’t trust me. I don’t care. I’ve done enough bad shit, and spent the last sixty years of my life lying through my teeth every goddamn day. I don’t need you to trust me. But I need to trust you to know that the ends justify the means. You’re sour over your star-faced man. Hawk told you that he stoked the fire there, tried to make it seem realer than it was. That we had a vested interest in people believing that Satan was lurking behind every corner. I was younger then. I was stepping boldly. I was trying to defend the dream of what America was supposed to be. Not let those Russian fucks dictate our future. I’ve done many things that haunt me, more than you can imagine.”

Bonus Propaganda via @mx-information:

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[thedeterminedj]

Have some quotes with Cross being bullied by the gang because I have a bunch of those for some reason

Cross: Time sensitive question- how flirt boy?

Killer: Throw rocks at he.

Horror: Hot dogs.

Dust: Kill him.

Cross: Thanks guys.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Nightmare: Hey guys, what’s a himbo?

Killer, no hesitation: Cross.

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Killer: We could work on some of the ideas I've been suggesting.

Cross: Those aren't ideas as much as they are random acts of violence.

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Cross, to the gang: I love you guys, but I think a lot of you are the kind of people who are susceptible to falling in with a cult.

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Cross: The Star Sanses ask me how I manage the gang so effectively.

Cross: Truth is, I don't. I have no control over them.

Cross: This morning Horror yelled for me so I went to see what was going on, and then Killer shot me in the throat with a nerf gun.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Killer: So what time does the Judgmental Express arrive?

Cross: Error gets here at noon.

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Cross, about the Bad Sans: Look at this group, Night.

Cross: Look me in the eye lights, and tell me these trainwrecks wouldn’t stick a fork in a socket if they had the chance.

Nightmare: …No comment...

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Nightmare: What the hell is all that noise-

(He walks in on Killer shoving Cross into the washing machine while Dust records and Horror watches)

Nightmare, turning back around: Something suddenly came up.

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Horror: Is stabbing someone immoral?

Killer: Not if they consent to it.

Dust: Depends who you’re stabbing.

Cross: YES?!?

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Cross: Oh Stars… Where are the brownies Epic made?

Dust: I think I saw Horror with them, why?

Cross: Oh god...

Horror, high as shit: I feel like a DVD player.

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Cross: What’s Nightmare’s type?

Killer: Tall, brave, loyal, oblivious, tragic backstory, questionable morals.

Cross: Huh, sounds a lot like me. Too bad we’re just friends.

Killer: Did I mention oblivious?

Cross: Yeah, why?

Killer: Just checking.

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Cross: I wrote down all the plans we shouldn’t try again

Nightmare, reading: ‘Lust tries to seduce someone then starts crying on command’.

Cross: It works like a charm but makes everyone uncomfortable.

Nightmare: ‘Killer improvises a breakdancing number’, ‘Horror pretends to be a therapist’.

Nightmare: ‘Dust jumping down a building, again’, underlined. ‘Pineapple’.

Nightmare: This just reads ‘Throw Error at enemies like a cat’.

Killer: Oh, no, that one works every time. Put it in the ‘to do’ pile.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Nightmare: Good morning, what the fuck is going on?

Cross: Bullshit.

Killer: War.

Dust: Hell.

Horror: Idk I just live here.