#there are some things i thought should be addressed better but its a book it doesn't have to be perfect for me to enjoy it

[endlesslycoffee]

y'all love complaining tsats is GOOD

[revolutionarywig]

Frev locations compile

Thought of compiling a list of frev significant locations so it can help with recommendations for anyone who happens to be travelling/visiting! This is only done to my knowledge and not a complete list, please feel free to suggest if you happen to know more locations that I completely missed!

so here is the frev pilgrimage list! Long post warning.

(Note: The items are not in any particular order)

(Note: I typed this post up a long time ago but couldn't finish, a lot of thanks to the people who helped out on contributing information and your patience with me.)

Musée Carnavalet (Paris)

This one is very obvious, it is a must go for seeing a collection of frev related artifacts and paintings, including Couthon’s wheelchair, Robespierre’s hair, the most iconic portraits etc. Also its FREE.

Panthéon (Paris)

You can see the statue of the National Convention deputies. It doesnt have too much related to frev directly, but Rousseau and Voltaire (and Carnot…..) are interred there

La Conciergerie (Paris)

If you want to see the Deseine bust of Robespierre, but cant go to Vizille, there is a copy of it here within Paris at the conciergerie. It is the place where most frev figures as well as Antoinette spent their last monents.

Musée des archives nationales (Paris)

(June 2023) There is a temporary exhibit featuring frev rn which I highly recommend (also its free to go so like GO)

But beyond the temporary exhibit, I believe there are still a few things in permanent collection (Robespierre’s note book page, Antoinette’s last letter in prison, Comte d’Artois’ letter etc), including the famous 9 thermidor table that Robespierre supposedly lied on. the museum is free to visit.

Père la Chaise (Paris)

@robespapier wrote a better post on navigating the cemetery. It helped me so much with finding the graves of Lebas, Elisabeth and Eleonore Duplay! Thank you so much for the guide!

Rue Saint Honoré (Paris)

the current address of the Duplays household is 398 rue saint-honoré, which is now next to a louboutin store…. There is a commemorative plaque there indicating Robespierre’s residence there. Im not sure about going inside the residence….There was construction when I visited and the door was open, heres how it looks on the inside.

SJ’s bust (Paris & Angers)

I have not visited either of the two locations yet, but you can find that white bust of Saint-Just (that seemed to be modelled after the pastel portrait in the Carnavalet) in either Petit Palais (Paris) or Galerie David d’Angers (Angers). @orpheusmori has posted some Petit Palais pictures here @robespapier has posted some Galerie David d'Angers pictures here

Marat sign (Paris)

i have an image of this plaque sitting on my phone, I forgot where it was located until @orpheusmori helped me track the location of it! It is in the Odéon area and should be in the small narrow street with the back side of Le Procope. It commemorates the location as an important area during the French Revolution as well as the place where Marat established his printing shop.

The front of the same building also has another Marat plaque! I didnt know about it before thank you @orpheusmori for finding and contributing the photo! This one is above an Jewellery store (Amour de Pierres) https://maps.app.goo.gl/8X9zgKYpMiLJcULq7

Olympe de Gouges sign (Paris)

Once again, i have a photo of the plaque proving its existence, but I took it years ago and i dont remember where it was exactly.... It was all in the Odéon area, it shouldn’t be too far from the other….

Danton statue (Paris)

there is a Danton statue! Right outside the Odéon metro! You cant miss it. Also the placement of the statue is where he once lived.

Procope (Paris)

Its a really old cafe frequented by a lot of philosophes as well as many frev figures. There is also a bicorn from Napoleon inside. Right now its still a restaurant establishment, and its difficult to visit unless you eat inside….which is expensive…. However ! This whole general Odéon area is full of other frev landmarks (some more mentioned below). Including the metro station which has a bust of Danton.

Versailles revolutionary room (Versailles)

Beyond the royal family, there is a room dedicated to a lot of major Revolutionary Army generals and battles. Theres that one painting of Lafayette if u into that

Musée des armes/Invalides (Paris)

It has a significant collection of military artefacts from the French Revolution and its a really good resource for armory researches. The museum also has a sword that belonged to Lafayette, as well as a sword belonging to Carnot during the Directoire (image below)

Louvre

The Louvre does not have a lot relating to the French Revolution but it has a few significant paintings and a lot of David’s work. One of the Death of Marat copies produced by David’s studio should be in the museum, as well as a painting featuring the battke of fleurus (with SJ cameo)

Tennis court (Versailles)

Near the palace of Versailles you can find the room where the deputies swore the famous oaths. It is free to enter, although last time I went it was undergoing construction, hopefully it should have finished by now.

Musée de la Révolution Française (Vizille)

If you can go to Vizille… GO TO VIZILLE! The easiest way by transport would be to stay at Grenoble then take one of the buses that runs between Grenoble and Vizille. It is a whole museum dedicated to the revolution (and it is free) and the park is really pretty. This is where you can find the statue of Marat,

The Deseine busts including dear Bonbon,

And DJ Saint-Just.

Also special thank you to @citizentaleo for taking me there, I would’ve otherwise been lost in the French mountains lol, thank you!

Maison Robespierre (Arras)

You can visit Robespierre’s residence in Arras. It is possible to visit the inside, but it has a very specific and short opening hours.

I wasn’t able to go in since I was only in Arras for a few hours….But I got to attend a conference by Hervé Leuwers aaa (He is very sweet and I learned quite few new things from the presentation, but thats post for another day)

Robespierre metro stop (Paris suburb)

There is in fact, a Robespierre metro station on line 9! Not much beyond name but at least some credit to him! Alas it is not exactly within Paris and just on the outskirt. (Oh and there is also Voltaire)

Cordeliers club (Paris)

I dont have much information on what happened to the original location of the Cordeliers club and how it was modified, but the location is part of the sorbonne campus now i believe. I'd be very curious if anyone knows more information on this.

Place de la Bastille (Paris)

The Bastille is of course not there anymore, but the ground around the square and including the metro stations near by have traces/marks of where the old prison would have stood.

(and yea the picture was taken during a manif)

Pavillon de flore (Paris)

The pavillon attached to the Louvre and next to the Pont Royale is the Pavillon de Flore, which is where the Committee de Salut Publique worked.

Jacobin club (Paris) Alas the original convent in which the Jacobin gathered is no more and replaced by a commercial centre instead (Passage de Jacobins) . There is a sign however recognizing the place for what it was.

Place de la Concorde (Paris) Originally Place de la Révolution, there is a plaque remembering the executions that took place here near the obelisk.

Maison SJ (Blérancourt) I have not been to Saint-Just's house yet, because it is very hard to commute there without a car. But it certainly is still there and (I believe) maintained by the Saint-Just Association.

Catacombs (Paris) According to wikipedia....The bone remains of many revolutionaries buried in Cimitière Errancis (which has a plaque indicating it in the 8th arrondissement, according to wikipedia) are transferred to the catacombs, including Robespierre, Danton, etc. The catacomb is roughly organized chronologically but there is obviously no sign indicating which bone it actually is.

Cluny La Sorbonne station (Paris) It is on metro line 10 and the waiting tunnel is decorated with signatures of prominent French figures. It doesn't have any actual frev artifacts, but it looks cool and you can spot Robespierre, Danton, and Camille Desmoulins' signatures on the ceiling.

Louis le Grand (Paris) The school that Robespierre attended is still under the same name and still in use as a school! (i've reached the image maximum alas i cannot add more images...)

And that is all I can think of so far! There is surely a lot more that are out there (including outside of France). Once again, please feel free to mention if you know more frev landmarks that I missed out on. And to whoever happens to be travelling I hope you find this list helpful to start with.

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

can i be honest? im a fan of azul but his dream felt like it lacked impact. there were some very interesting moments and its better than the prediction that he would already be rich and own the world

like really? azul becomes a famous athlete and bullies others, then he takes over night raven? i feel like his struggles with his own identity and food could have been further explored and he is based off of ursula, which should extend to vanessa, right? it was the perfect reason to give him a total makeover and show that he has to be comfortable in his own skin before anything else, even if his other ness was what made him a target of bullying in the first place

your thoughts and worries on book 7 post has affected my perspective and i cant help but feel like something is missing 🥲 maybe all the budget went into Jade and Floyd?

[Referencing this post!]

As I’ve previously expressed, I have a lot of my own complicated feelings about the direction book 7 is taking, specifically with how the OB boys’ dream segments are presented and resolved. Azul’s dream is no different; it felt very contrived due to the formula TWST insists on running with in every new installment. It’s becoming even more apparent with each update, and it is really grating on me.

But!! Before I get to what I believe are shortcomings with Azul’s dream, let’s review what Anon has to say.

I feel like, no matter what, there will always be people claiming that the OB boys’ dreams are “missed opportunities”. This is simply because these characters have much more deep and complex issues than the rest of the cast, so we will naturally scrutinize them more. TWST is basically only able to go with one angle when they tackle the dream, leaving the other threads unexplored. This will surely annoy or disappoint people who wish that TWST would have addressed a different issue instead, or perhaps something closer to their personal interpretation of the events. In Azul’s case, I feel like some people (particularly in the west, not so much in the east) see Azul’s weight concerns or relationship with food as a prominent part of his character, so they wish that book 7 part 10 had looked into that more. However, that was never a big focus in canon, so it follows that TWST would want to dedicate its time and resources to the most pressing thing (which would be more centered on Azul’s general self-confidence, greed, and how those tie into his sense of identity). At the same time, they probably wanted to avoid a lens that is too broad. Having the focus be on Azul’s “otherness” or being an octopus might veer too heavily into something way beyond the scope of the ~10 parts of the story he has to himself.

We also need to consider that these dreams are meant to be shallow interpretations of what the dreamer desires (according to Idia). Only the OB boys get to go more in depth due to bring dragged down into deeper layers of their dreams. Azul wants to be accepted by his peers and is insecure about his lack of athleticism (as one reason why he was bullied was due to not being able to swim as fast as other merchildren). So of course the surface level of his dream makes him a star athlete beloved by all. The whole “his plan succeeds, he steals everyone’s magic, he takes over NRC” thing happens in the second layer of his dream, which, like all previous OB boys, is a dark display of what would have happened had they not been stopped. And finally, Azul being a bully is nothing new—we saw this behavior back in book 3 as well. He became the very thing he despised back when he was a victim, and now he continues to perpetuate that cycle of bullying in an effort to affirm confidence in his “cool” new identity. I think the dream was very intentional in trying to entice him with the promises of power and acceptance. That, in turn, shows us that the desire to be a successful businessman (the thing many of us thought would be his dream) actually hinges on Azul’s longing to be accepted. His struggle with his identity and how it depends on how others perceive him was portrayed. I’m just not sure if the idea was executed in the best way, since it sounds like the message may have gotten muddled along the way and it definitely requires some reading between the lines.

I noticed that you cited my original post where I detailed my concerns about book 7 and how that has influenced your own thoughts 💦 I hope that it just… informed or supplemented your opinions rather than suddenly altered them to be more “in line” with my own. I never want to be the kind of person who claims their interpretations are the “most correct” I’m not Riddle’s mom, okay?? 😭

About Jade and Floyd’s dreams, I feel like those are less heavily critiqued because they, by virtue of not being an OB boy, have fewer stakes and are predominantly there to be silly. It’s like contrasting Epel wanting to be big and buff to Vil literally murdering Neige; there is just no comparison. Even then, I wouldn’t necessarily say Floyd’s and Jade’s parts received “all the budget”… They seemed like pretty basic storylines to me, perhaps dressed up slightly better thanks to the new undersea assets and bioluminescence reveal.

My issues with Azul’s dream segment is how… ham-fisted several elements were. All of it, for the sake of sticking to the pattern already established earlier. It feels so unnatural and stilted because you just KNOW it’s written this way to fit the template 😔 For example:

Why did Jade become SO dumb when they were trying to figure out where Azul had moved the contracts? He’s supposed to be much smarter than how he is presented here. Wouldn’t his immediate thought be to check Azul’s room? But NO, Jade can’t come to that conclusion on his own because we need a contrived reason for each student to use their UM before the ending :/ so Jade has to waste time using his UM to get the truth out of his dream!self.

Jade and Floyd sitting around and going “………….” while they watch Azul make an ass of himself was such a time waster. Clearly you have enough brains to know what would trigger him, so why are you not acting on it???? Oh yeah, because we need to show more cool stuff in this dream like La Grotta!

Azul literally turns to the camera and tells his OB self, “Unlike you, I’ve changed.” It’s way too on the nose with what it’s trying to communicate. It breaks immersion and makes it so obvious the characters are outright stating their character development to make sure we all “get it”.

What was the purpose of Azul using his UM to get the mermobs to sign a contract to give all their power to him???💀 Bro can just say “excuse me, I forgot something back at the Coral Rush field” and they’d probably let him pass. But again, Azul isn’t allowed to do that because he MUST use his UM before the ending. Because Azul’s UM requires that another person willingly agree and sign a contract, his mandatory UM use before the grand finale feels particularly forced.

How many times do I need to listen to Idia/Ortho or other characters warn us about how we can’t have too many people dream hopping or else bugs might happen or Malleus might notice… It’s almost like the devs realize how long this is being dragged out for so they have to remind us every so often.

Not only that, but we get such poorly constructed explanations to keep characters behind while a new character goes with the main group. Why don’t you just leave them all behind once they’re awake then?? Oh yeah, because we NEED to drag along the current student into the next dream so everyone gets a cameo. It’s so inorganic how the characters are chosen to stay behind, Jamil just conveniently volunteers himself while we also listen to another spiel from Silver and Sebek about how their training makes them more stable than the twins to keep dream hopping.

I would actually consider Azul’s dream… serviceable? Like it isn’t fantastic or anything but for what it is, it works. It’s cohesive enough. But god, did I dislike how rigid it was… Nothing happens because it’s natural, it happens because the script demands it happens. To quote another post:

If anyone has played the first Ace Attorney game, this feels a LOT like that part in case 2 where Phoenix is too dumb to check the back of a receipt until Mia literally tells him to. The [characters have] to actively be made stupider because the scenario calls for it, and that really rubs me the wrong way.

[pdpenpals]

hihi! i was wondering if i could get a romantic letter from phoenix drop high gene? she/they pronouns please :)

and for the context of the letter, maybe Gene & Reader recently started dating but can’t text because Reader is away at an academic sleep away camp (preferably centered around literature/writing)? Reader is on the more academic/nerdy side and not officially part of the SK so them doing these kinds of programs is their usual summer thing but it’s the first time Gene and Reader have been away from eachother since they started dating

tysm <33

hihi!! thanks for sending this in, i think this prompt’s absolutely adorable!

unrelated but speaking of literature whenever i see gene now that i’m older i think of heathcliff (more of the name) or the phantom for some reason.

your entire being perks up at the mention that a letter’s arrived, and your heart races as you go through who could have possibly sent it in your head. the moment you have it in your hands, you can almost tell exactly who it’s from. the envelope’s a dark gray, close enough to be black. there are stickers all over its back next to your name and address, same goes for the front. opening it, you catch a whiff of someone familiar’s cologne. that cheeky bastard. 

you notice almost immediately that there’s not only a letter inside, but a bunch of printed photos and some unused stickers. after finding a spot to settle your new goodies upon, you get comfy and get to reading.

Hey cutie. Miss me yet? 

Heard a fair’s coming to town soon. I think it’ll still be there when you get back. There should even be fireworks on the last day. We can go there if you wanna.

Other than that, nothing much happened today. Dante was out, and I had the house to myself for a good portion of the afternoon. Without sugarcoating it, I was bored out of my mind.

It took me a while to figure out my texts or calls weren’t getting through to you. Mom must have seen how frustrated I was about it, so she shared some of her spare stationery with me as a last resort. She said something about wanting to hear about how your summer’s been doing so far.

That’s all the small talk I can handle for today. You might get too tired of staring at only words for too long over there, so you might want to check out the pics taken these past few days. The stickers are from Zenix and Sasha by the way, they also say hi.

Kidding aside, I know how much this whole camp thing means to you.  But I’ve been feeling weird ever since you left. It’s weirder knowing you’re not nearby. When you’re not a walk or a call away. Even though I know exactly how many days and many hours are left until you come back.

Sappy shit out the way, I decided to read that one book you lent me at random. I’m not sure you remember it much since you hurriedly gave it to me without a second thought, but it’s that really old one about the day before the world ends. All that apocalyptic and sad shit. Even though I didn’t get it, I guess it was nice that Vincent and Leticia got their happy ending. To be honest, the book overall didn’t stand out to me much, but the concept of having one day left to live sure did.

If I knew the world was going to end tomorrow I would

Y’know, maybe it’s for the best I save it for when we meet again in person, so you better come back home in one piece, yeah?

With an aching heart and hand, Your Gene, who misses you terribly

PS. I feel like you’ve been rubbing off on me recently, state-of-mind-wise. While it’s not that bad, it gives me the chills.

PPS. If not having you near me hasn't driven me insane yet, I definitely will go mad if this letter doesn't make it to you. Especially after all I've put my wrist through just for this. Maybe I should visit the post office a few more times?

[batrogers]

Civilized Or Not

So there’s some common Zelda fanon I wanna talk about, relating to civilization tropes I think some of y’all haven’t really thought about in detail before, and that’s Hyrule (Zelda 1 &2 Link), Wild (BOTW mostly), and Ravio (LbW).

I’m using the Linked Universe names, because that’s where most of it comes up, because these things happen most often where you can contrast the boys with each other. This is often done, quick and dirty, by people assigning “roles” to each without much thought. Ravio’s unfortunately tends to be extremely pervasive outside LU spaces, too.

But, in brief, there is a trend for people to craft these characters in a framework of innocent vs savagery vs trickery that can have some really unfortunate implications I’m not sure many are even aware of. Hopefully I can explain better where these ideas come from, why they’re so easy and appealing, and why we should try to avoid repeating them for more than just the sake of “easy” but also to stop repeating some really nasty historical tropes.

I would start from what’s probably the simplest one to address: the tendency towards a “feral” personification of Wild. This tends to come from two places: Wild’s amnesia, and the collapse of society around him and his lost place in it.

Now, brain damage is complicated. You can lose a range of things to any given injury because of the way information is encoded differently and in different places. You can lose memory and/or skills and/or coordination and/or balance, etc, because it all depends on what got damaged. But in-game a lot of stuff suggests that Link retains things like speech, reading/writing, coordination, and martial skills. None of the people who knew Link prior to his injury suggest he seems changed in any way not attributed to stress and anxiety...

And, more importantly, real people suffer memory loss just like that in the real world. Treating him like he’s become “feral” due to memory loss is cruel to actual people living with brain damage today, and if you go there you should have a good reason for it.

Social collapse is a wide-spread theme in basically every Zelda game. The threat that the Big Bad poses is almost always the destruction of society as it exists: Malladus literally vanishes the infrastructure of New Hyrule in Spirit Tracks; the Twilight turns people into spirits living lives they don’t realize are questionably real in Twilight Princess; Veran freezes the passage of time to force people to work forever in Oracle of Ages. King Daphnes and Ganondorf under the sea vie over the fate of the world above in Wind Waker: keep what’s been made, or start all over again?

In modern culture, people tell a lot of stories about the fragility of civilization and what happens in its absence. You get the range from Lord of the Flies, in which children wrecked on an island attempt (and fail) to recreate civilization on their own, Kipling’s “The Jungle Book” in which Mowgli is treated as reckless and innocent, and a much more obscure piece from the 18th century “Paul et Virginie” (and likely many more I don’t know offhand.) Essentially all of them play with the question of how do people become civilized, and what happens when they do? In Lord of the Flies, the children were civilized and failed to maintain it; in the Jungle Book, the boy wasn’t civilized and innocently interacts with it. In Paul et Virginie, the children were (relatively) uncivilized on the (French colonized) Mauritius, raised by their mothers but when the girl was sent away, she becomes civilized and dies tragically to preserve it.

The two Links most removed from civilization are Hyrule and Wild. Wild “lost” civilization, losing both his memories of it and the structure of it. Making him feral, without manners, and without a place to belong is that kind of Lord of the Flies savagery mixed with Mowgli’s innocent playfulness: there isn’t a structure to adhere to, so he’s a savage. Whereas Hyrule is more like the Paul eg Virginie side: innocent of civilization, he remains pure and sweet and kind, unable to conceive of big concepts like evil or money or so on. Neither position permits them to interact with the civilization that is right there in front of them! Wild can buy a house; he has people who know and care for him. He has social connections and social rights. The world exists, but the fandom does not seem to want him to interact with it in favour of remaining “wild.” In Zelda 2 – a game explicitly set within a decade of Zelda 1 – there are whole towns with trade and a castle and massive structures with on-going life in them... but very few fans seem to ever reach into that story or relate it back to the first. Hyrule, the character, does not exist within Hyrule, the country.

Strangely, Wind Waker does not fall prey to this, I think because the structures are presented as fait accompli: Link wakes up with his grandmother and his sister, he has a defined home, and a society in which you spend the entire game forced to engage with. Zelda 1 & 2 were not sophisticated enough to waste resources on going as in depth in social terms (although such interactions absolutely exist in Zelda 2!) and BOTW leaves such interactions as optional: you can survive the game with minimal social contact... but it’s a choice to play with it that way, not the default. The ways in which this edges onto the noble savage trope, in which “uncivilized” tribes are either innocent or brutish (rather than complex social systems in their own right) is fairly obvious.

There is one other character in Zelda who gets treated to the question of whether he is an innocent, free of civilization and all its rigour... or something else. Ravio, coming from the devastated world of Lorule, can often wind up slotted into the scared, innocent child trope and unfortunately that’s the better position people frequently take. The worse one evokes the Merchant of Venice: the deceitful, Jewish merchant who values money over people’s lives.

Lorule (and Nintedo’s approach towards their humanoid Zelda villains in general) is near-eastern-coded in many ways, down to the fact that Yuga’s outfit is the spitting image of Ottoman dress. Yuga being a depraved bisexual (a common historical trope about Muslim men towards Christian men and boys), and Hilda being deceitful and conspiring against everyone she was once allied to are a backdrop to the ways in which Ravio is a greedy coward. He’s not an evil character in the game; the mechanic of penalizing death without being too severe is interesting and works well! But that doesn’t take away the stereotype, just like it’s not okay Nabooru is pretty explicitly predatory towards child Link in Ocarina of Time, too.

Arab and Jewish stereotypes often converge, because both people's originate from the same region, and both are hostile "Others" to Christian Europe and Nintendo doesn’t have a great track record of their near-Eastern coding in Zelda. It crosses the whole gamut from harem and amazon tropes with the Gerudo to breath-takingly anti-semitic or anti-black (Ganondorf being green, eg. non-human, in various incarnations), all packaged neatly in the ideal of medieval fantasy Europe. The scale would be impressive if it wasn’t so damn awful, but we can at least stop repeating it in our fanworks.

Wild doesn’t have to be feral to be a playful little shit; Hyrule doesn’t have to be pure and innocent to be kind. Ravio doesn’t need to be innocent or scheming, and he shouldn’t place money over Link’s well-being (If you chose to respawn at home, he is consistently only ever concerned for Link! Once you buy the items outright, he promises he'll still be there to take care of you.)

Do better. It’s more interesting that way, and I want to see that variety grow!

[If any of y'all would like me to dig up better sources on any point, I can do so but I didn't want to bog this post down further. I have largely left the anti-arab stuff alone because it's not the biggest issue with Ravio's fanon presence, which is the focus here.]

[quimichi]

Hello! This is my first time asking so forgive my mistakes,

I don’t know if you’ve done this before but could you do headcanons for a reader who’s lumine’s traveling partner and when their in liyue (I don’t remember how it’s spelt 🥲) Qiqi randomly starts addressing them as her parent, uhhh what’s the reaction of the liyue crew (who kinda have feels for reader) when reader just accepts it and calls her their daughter

Gosh that was long, yea that’s my ask sorry for the mistakes 😅 you don’t have to do it if you’re busy

-Honey Anon

. . . . ╰──╮BEING QIQI'S "PARENT" ╭──╯ . . . .

PLATONIC!Qiqi x GN!Reader

¡! ❞ having qiqi refer to you as her parent, which is clearly not the truth, is a situation you needed to get used to

¡! ❞ but no wonder she thinks you're her parent when you take care of her. Yes, Baizhu does too but you somehow manage to not order her around and rather gently guide her and help. (Not like baizhu would mistreat her or anything!)

¡! ❞ you always remind her to take her notebook with her, on her worst days she may forget it to take it. On the absolute worst days she even forgot where she put it. Luckily you always remember

¡! ❞ awww look at you always packing her lunch for when she works at bubu pharmacy. And the lunch always includes coconut milk, thats very important

¡! ❞ you know she can't taste anything, but she can feel textures and temperatures, so her lunchbox may look weird to people who dont know. You always try your best to pack in every food she likes the texture or temperature of

¡! ❞ I don't really know if she needs to eat and drink but--pls it's to cute

¡! ❞ Qiqi also looooves to pick herbs with you! She can't really show emotions but having you by her side all day long really makes her feel "better". With you she feels like she can't forget anything

¡! ❞ she read in books how parents act with their children, and this is what you do with her. So obviously you must be her parent!

¡! ❞ she's proud of that conclusion tho

¡! ❞ she mostly stays over at your place, sleeps with you all cuddled up in her parents arms. Its cute, really

¡! ❞ she's stuck with you, or you're rather with her but who would complain about little cute qiqi being glued to your side?

¡! ❞ Lumine and Paimon also find it adorable, weird at first but it's cute. Paimon tried once or twice to explain qiqi that you are indeed not her parent but Lumine always stops her. Crushing a little zombies dreams like this is not what they want.

¡! ❞ but they're happy for you and sometimes even join in, in the herb adventures if they have time

¡! ❞ Baizhu on the other hand was not surprised at qiqi calling you her parent. (Considering he probably was the one who gave her the books where the most basic human stuff was written down so she would remember or know) Theres not much that can surprise him. But hes sure also very happy. At first he was worried, you could hurt her or play around with her forgetfull mind. But you didn't, you helped even more and then he was relieved. What a relief no he doesn't have to poison you---

¡! ❞ and after more time spend with you and qiqi together he understood why she feels this way. Youre patient, caring and supportive. Like a good parent should be. Hes even prouer when qiqi seemed to have thought you some things about herbs. It was for sure a accident she did but now you can even help around in Bubu pharmacy with little to no struggle

¡! ❞ not Baizhu realizing he caught feelings after a few months. Panic--like this was not his intention at all-

¡! ❞ but Zhongli was definitely warm around he heart. What a nice and caring person you must be that a child will call you their parent. He already was interested in you before but now---

¡! ❞ Qiqi calling you her parent was a big gossip in Liyue once, everybody knew or talked about it and it also came to the ears of Ningguang, Keqing and Ganyu. All three of them are taken aback by the cuteness overload of it all. Although Ganyu was more open to show how soft you made her feel with you parently behavior

¡! ❞ whenever Ningguang is in Liyue she will pay Bubu pharmacy a visit just to see you two acting along. She might even give you some Mora for Qiqi like a sugar mommy--but mostly because her heart is aching for you and your attention-pls visit her in the Jade palace too, you might also bring Qiqi along for a evening tea! Be careful to not let her fall down tho---

A/n: getting the others involved was very hard to do and didn't truned out this well but--yeah

[orchidyoonkook]

To What We Were Before, And All The Things After | JJK | Ch. 3

Title: Greenhouse Muses and Surprise Guests   

Pairing: Prince!College Student!JK x Fine Arts Major!(F)!Reader

Series Rating//Genre: (M) | College AU, Mild Royalty AU, Smut, Angst, Fluff, S2F2L, Indiffernce to lovers, sloooowwww ass burn

Summary: You need to think out this whole situation, and where better than your favourite place on campus? The one place where no one ever goes and where you can truly do your best problem solvi—wait who the hell is sitting in your supposed place of undisturbed tranquility? 

Warnings: PG18, heavy swearing, photography jargon (hopefully nothing tooooo confusing, I intentionally over explained a bit for those unfamiliar but a quick google search should clear up anything), euc=short form for eucalyptus “Youke”, art jargon but less, 1 (one) mention of metaphorical murder, and a bit of angst and fluff. I think that’s all?? Hella internal dialogue 

Word Count: 10,804

Release Date: March 2, 2023, 4:00PM

A/N 1: she somehow went from 8k to 10.8k???? Hope you enjoy!!

A/N 1.5: I’m literally so tired of looking at this, I’ve read it at least 10 times in three days. 

Series: Chapter One | Chapter Two

Jungkook’s sitting at a table outside what he considers to be his new safe haven, making a mental note to thank Yuri for showing him the greenhouse cafe—is that its name? He should’ve asked.

He can see himself coming here all the time for quiet morning work sessions. The coffee is great, the snacks are delicious, and there aren’t a lot of people around either—zero—to be precise. So he really considers this a win in his book.

The cafe is just southwest of a medium sized greenhouse, not even a minute's walking distance between the two. He could clearly see all the flowers and plants within from his seat outside. And behind the greenhouse was nothing but a small grass field followed by thick, dense forest.

It doesn’t even feel like he’s on campus. Just free about the world, grabbing a coffee and sitting down to work on a project like anyone else would. Like anyone else could. Another face in the crowd instead of the one on magazines in every corner store, book shop and grocer.

He can dream about it. Take in these small moments, but it will never be his reality. Not really. Even in this little corner of blissful nowhere the barista who served him his coffee knew who he was, addressed him properly, albeit a bit stuttered.

And he can’t blame her. It’s what she’s supposed to do. How she’s ‘supposed’ to react to him. 

He’s someone big and important. Someone people look to and see their future in his hands. Someone who merits reactions when in the presence of others. 

Someone who...

Someone...

So he dreams. And is thankful for what little normalcy he can get.

Taking a deep breath in, he holds it and he shakes his head, dismissing the thoughts before releasing a steady, controlled exhale.

Reset.

The cafe has an awning over its small patio, four tables on either side of the doorway, two that seat four and two that seat two on their respective sides, eight in total. He’s chosen to sit at the table of two furthest from the greenhouse, closest to the cafe. It has more shade, allowing him to see the screen of his laptop better.

Jungkook needed some time alone without anyone finding him, he gave that stupid speech on Monday for many reasons, but one of the most important ones was that he wants to be able to exist in a public space and to do his school work without a crowd gathering.

He’s taking this university thing seriously, and that means doing good work, excelling in his chosen subjects. It requires no distractions and lots of effort.

He doesn’t want to have to be cramped up in his dorm the whole time, too scared to leave for fear of never being left alone. He left that behind when he stepped foot onto the campus.

No more worrying about cameras or security or kingdoms. No more watching and tracking his every step.

This is his time to be a young man, not the prince. Just Jungkook.

And so far? He’s doing okay.

But just in case, he’s also wearing a hat, hoodie and mask for extra protection while editing some pictures.

Old habits die hard.

His Design and Visual Culture professor had given out an intro assignment to the class so he could get a read on everyone’s skill levels and to see where his starting point would be. Professor Hirmer asked everyone in the class to each submit three images: one portrait; black and white or colour, one still life of the photographers choosing, and one image of whatever your preferred style was. Then edit them to the best of their abilities, and submit by noon the following Monday.

Jungkook’s already finished his portrait. He hasn’t really made any friends here yet, so he just took one of himself, which made it easier in the long run because he was so used to his picture being taken.

Slicked back hair, a black tight fit shirt, silver chain and white background made up the shot aside from him. He’d decided on butterfly lighting because he’s always found it to be the most flattering aside from Rembrandt. Don’t get him wrong, Rembrandt’s a nice technique, Jungkook just didn’t want his portrait to be too dramatic.

He got the one he wanted to use in no time, and it required very little editing. Black and white is forgiving like that.

Currently, he’s working on his still life.

A latte with a basic heart design in a dark navy mug sat on the keys of a mahogany wood grand piano. The mug sat on the right side of thirds, and a couple stems of eucalyptus half cover the keys to the left, the tips of it just barely covering the bottom of the mug. He kept his depth of field wide so that most of what was in the frame was in focus, but the primary focus of the entire image is intended to be the drink and tips of the eucalyptus.

Jungkook managed to get one of the six guards his father insisted on him having here to go to a local market to grab the euc stems. Their remains were currently hanging in his shower, smelling wonderful and fresh.

The latte he did himself, a small talent after needing coffee constantly in his teen years to keep up with everything.

And as for the piano? He booked a music room for an hour with one in it. Work smarter not harder.

He’d kept his lighting dark, but gentle, really highlighting the whites of the piano keys while keeping the rich hues of the mahogany and navy present. The eucalyptus is comfortably set in the middle, having some brighter and darker tones to balance it out.

He’s quite proud of it, having created a visually pleasing image that had equal amounts of high, medium and low tones. But he wants the edges of the picture to blur slightly, so he’s adding a very subtly feathered vignette to the image.

He knows most of his peers will likely be doing a traditional still life of fruit or flowers, so he took a risk and made the prompt his own. He just hopes it pays off.

While editing, Jungkook’s simultaneously trying to brainstorm what he wants to do for his third picture. His style of choice is candids, takes them constantly, yet he doesn’t have a single one he wants to use for the assignment.

He likes them best because candids are those perfectly imperfect moments that show who a person truly is, when they’re at their happiest and saddest moments and everything in between. Candids are for when someone’s so caught up in what they’re doing that they look entirely serene in their task, and you want to capture that, forever. A small sliver of them, existing purely as they are.

Nothing fake, nothing practiced, no do overs. Just capturing genuine moments as they happen. A true reflection of humanity without filters or editing.

Jungkook’s thinking of maybe going undercover in the courtyard to snap some pictures of random people to see if that could work when a movement in the corner of his eye catches his attention.

Someone, with their back facing him, is very unceremoniously dumping their tote bag at the table most opposite him; the table for two that’s half covered in sunlight, half shaded.

Clad in loose fitting paint and charcoal covered overalls, a white shirt and bandana, they’re taking out what appear to be art supplies.

Brushes, small metal tins filled with paint, a very chaotically colourful water holder, and painting pad all gather onto the little table. He’s surprised at how they make it all fit.

It seems like he’s not the only one who’s seen this place for its potential.

But when they turn around, it’s…You?

It’s you.

Of all people.

What are the odds?

He wants to say hi, but hesitates, still aware of your conversation from earlier and hopes there’s no harm in a friendly hello between people who are acquainted, regardless of pending decisions.

But Jungkook watches your eyes pass right over him, unaware or uncaring he’s there. His half-raised hand falls along with the smile that’s found its way onto his covered face as you continue into the cafe.

A byproduct of his upbringing is being able to read even the subtlest of body language and facial shifts in people. And in your case, it’s like you’re screaming at him without actually speaking.

He knows from your closed off posture alone that you don’t want to be disturbed. But your expression…it's like a mixture of anger, worry and thoughtfulness.

Jungkook knows better than to interrupt someone when they look like that, and he decides against saying anything, returning to his assignment.

A minute later the bell on the door chimes, signaling your exit. 

Looking up, he notes the cup of warm whatever it is in one hand, a very full looking pastry bag in the other, and a water bottle tucked into your side via your elbow.

He wonders what’s inside the cup. Coffee? Would you drink caffeinated or decaf? Or maybe you’re more of a tea person. But would it be black or green tea? Do you use milk? What about sweetener? He can’t decide but that doesn’t stop the thoughts from racing across his mind.

Why does he care so much?

You settle down into your seat, the shaded one of the pair, and—somehow—place your newly acquired goods on the already jam packed table. Truly a talent within itself.

But a sip from your cup, and a bite of something that resembles a tart later, you wipe your hands on your overalls and pick up a brush, wetting it from the colourful container. Bringing the empty, water only filled brush to the paint pad in front of you, you start.

Your back blocks most of it so he can’t see much, but your eye line is honed in on the greenhouse. And if he had to guess just by looking, you’re focused on the orchid that sits front and center. 

He couldn’t name it specifically, but he can see why you’d want to commit it to paper. It’s pretty—yellow and red, very exotic looking, and he doesn't mean to—doesn’t even realize he is—when he finds himself watching you work instead of doing his own, mesmerized.

Your hand moves gracefully from paint to paper to water and back again.  Occasionally, switching out brushes or wiping the one you had on your pants, drying it or maybe getting the last bits of colour off. He’s fascinated with how you know exactly what to use and where to put what in order for the image to spring to life. Most likely years of practice and muscle memory guiding you.

Sort of how he does photography. Years of experience and knowing which poses and angles to use to really make an image pop. For a moment he wonders if anyones looked at his art the way he’s looking at yours.

When you take a small break, stretching out your back and limbs, Jungkook snaps out of his daze and looks at the clock on the bottom right hand side of his screen.

He’s been watching you for nearly 30 minutes.

That’s creepy as hell Jeon, he thinks to himself, lucky you didn’t notice, and returns his sights to his laptop.

Fuck. What was he doing again?

Staring at the still life in front of him, it takes a minute before he recalls.

Oh right.

Professor Hirmer’s assignment. The third image. A picture of his preferred style—his preferred style of candids. What could he do for his candid shot?

He thinks. A candid shot. Candids. Caaaannnndidddssssss. Caaaaaa—

A lightbulb goes off and he feels like both an idiot and a genius.

Retrieving his camera from his bag, Jungkook glances your way and sees you painting again.

Perfect.

Quietly, he gets up from his seat, moving just enough to be able to see a sliver of your painting and a small portion of your face. You're so focused that you don't even notice him, like nothing outside the page matters. And only for a second does he wonder what you’re thinking about.

Your body is easy to read, it’s your mind that remains a mystery.

The sun’s moved ever so slightly so that your page is now fully doused in sunlight, while you remain under the gentle caress of shadow from the awning.

Smart girl.

But your face is bathed in the subtle glow of your papers reflecting illumination. And it's like you’re the one creating light with every brush stroke.

You look transcendent.

With that sight in his viewfinder, Jungkook takes a few shots in portrait framing, his thumb covering the speaker that lets out the ‘click’ noise of a picture being taken, before adjusting his shutter speed.

These pictures all have you in focus, with the background consisting of half somewhat blurry cafe wall, half very blurry forest green. And they’re okay, they work. But he wants to have your movements and surrounding materials in the image as well, to really show the process of an artist at work. So he switches to a landscape framing and settles on a slower shutter speed to create a longer exposure.

Waiting for you to clean your brush in the water cup before snapping the capture button, Jungkook holds steady as it’s a couple seconds before the image takes. It makes him wish he had his tripod with him because it would make this so much easier, but he can make due if he has too. 

And he has too. Because he doesn’t want this opportunity to pass.

After a few more shots and near leg cramp later, he brings the results of his efforts up on the viewfinder for review. Jungkook’s thrilled to see that the movement in the piece was taken exactly how he wanted. Your arm steady on the canvas, but all your movements prior shown like angelically lit rays due to the angle of the sun, creating an ocean of movement around a steadily focused you.

They’re hauntingly beautiful. 

He takes a couple more like that for good measure, getting in different movements and shutter speeds before slowly making his way back to his laptop and table.

Popping his SD card into his computer for closer inspection, Jungkook sees there’s definitely more than one useful candidate and gets to work on narrowing down his favourite.

He is going to pass this assignment with flying colours. And it’s all thanks to you.

As you arrive at the cafe you notice a guy in a black hoodie, hat and mask with his head stuck in a laptop at the furthest table on the patio. Internally, you sigh that there’s someone else here; it’s almost always vacant and that’s why you love it. No people, no distractions, just you and your work, and your thoughts.

You try not to worry too much about it, doing your best to just ignore him and have hope that he leaves soon. At least he’s as far away from your spot as he can get.

Dropping your tote on the chair in the sun, you start placing all your things on the table. It’s an exact science you’ve perfected over many, many paint sessions and far too much spilled liquid. Countless art projects have fallen victim on this table, some you were able to salvage, but most were added to its body count.

Setting down your paint tins, you still can’t get the conversation with Yuri out of your head. Not leaving the building, not crossing the campus, not all the time it took you to get way over here either, no matter how hard you tried.

You huff.

Was your reaction really that unjustified? Could she not see how insane she was acting? Why did she jump to you being jealous? Why would she even think you’d be jealous?

You have Nel.

A prince isn’t going to change that.

And speaking of, you didn’t even get to tell her about your conversation with Jungkook.

After this fight though…you don’t think you will.

He seems to be becoming a sore spot between the two of you, ridiculous as that is, so you think it best to just not bring it up and deal with it on your own. That’s how you usually do things anyway, and you were only going to ask Yuri as a thinking out loud type of thing, hoping she had some input. But it’s clear now that none of it would have been useful anyway.

Finishing placing your things down—all fitting perfectly, by the way—you dig into your tote for your wallet and head into the cafe, still doing your best to ignore the other patron. Hopefully you can give off enough of a vibe that he takes the hint and leaves.

The bells hanging on the door sound as it opens and shuts.

“Hey YN,” Vivian, the barista, calls at your entrance.

You two know each other well, enough to be on a first name basis. You, being one of—if not the only—regular, and the cafe—being a little out of the way of anything else—not having many students make it a part of their routine.

A comfortable, welcomed sort of exile. One you gladly share with her.

“It’s good to see you,” she says, looking at the window closest to where you sit, “Are we painting again? I saw they switched up the flowers in the greenhouse on Monday. The ones they have out now are so beautiful.”

“It’s great to see you too, Viv” you respond, eyeballing the pastry display. You notice they have your favourite egg tarts in today.

At least one thing is going right for you.

“And yeah, they are,” you say warmly, regarding her comment. “I’m thinking I’m about to get real sick and tired of looking at that orchid they placed front and center.”

Viv laughs, patiently waiting on your order, though she’s got a good idea of what it’ll be.

“Could I get a hot chocolate with whip please?” You ask, and drum your fingers on your legs deciding how many tarts to get—two or three? Two or three?—before remembering, “Oh! and if you still have the not so super secret stash of mini marshmallows that you don’t have here,” throwing up air quotes and a smirk for good measure, “Could you toss a few of those in too? I’ll tip you extraaaaa.”

Viv only gives you a look that says yes they do but that she’ll never admit it out loud, and you’re grateful to her.

You’d spotted them one day by chance in first year and asked if you could have some with your drink. Viv merely stated that they don’t have marshmallows at the cafe while slipping a few in under your lid with a wink. You’ve been eternally appreciative for that kindness ever since, and tip her handsomely for it, but you’ve never known why it was such a secret. 

Maybe one day you’ll ask.  

Coffee isn’t really your thing, only turning to it during exams season, and you weren’t in the mood for tea, so hot chocolate’s always your favourite alternative.

But hot chocolate with whip cream and marshmallows?

Instant mood booster. And you definitely need that after the afternoon you’ve had.

“Anything else?” Viv asks, adding the large amount of whip cream she knows you like to the top of your drink.

“Yeah actually,” you smile, “could I get a water bottle and three of the egg tarts? They’re my favourite.”

Three seemed to be the most unreasonable option, therefore it’s the one you had to go with. And soon, a much too small, very full paper pastry bag finds its way onto the counter, accompanying your drinks.

“I’ll let bossman know about your dragon-like hoarding tendencies with the tarts and see if we can get them in more regularly,” Viv says, unsuccessfully keeping in a giggle at the end of her subtle jab and it makes you laugh too. “I mean, I don’t see why not seeing as you pretty much single handedly keep this place afloat anyway.”

You adore Viv. She’s real and kind, and very much someone you consider to be a bosom friend of sorts. You can tell her if you’ve had a bad day or a good one, and she’ll do the same, no shroud of inane pleasantries. You two having escaped the somewhat awkward ‘you work here and I go here so lets be nice to one another’ worker-customer relationship to a genuine friendship, and it makes the whole experience that much better. 

But it also allows for pulling on one another’s legs, like you do now.

“You’re so mean to me… and lucky I like you for it,” you say, opening your wallet, happy to pay whatever number you’re given plus 30%. The marshmallows and Viv are worth it. “How much will it be?”

She lets you know the total and you hand her a couple of mandatory bills plus a few extra, telling her to keep the change. You’ll lose any coins you have anyway, might as well give them to someone who’ll use them.

Viv says thanks and you make your way back to your spot, hands full and mind feeling a little lighter.

Thanks Viv.

Sitting down, you take a swig of your drink, a bite of your newly acquired tarts and get to work.

Starting with a wet on wet approach: you brush the canvas with water where you’ll eventually put some colour so it bleeds intentionally, and glance up every couple seconds to make sure to get a proper likeness.

It’s a yellow tiger orchid, truly beautiful—you’re a bit of a flower nerd because of your mom, but especially with orchids because they’re your favourite. They just come in so many different forms, it’s hard not to love their diversity.

Dipping into your paints now, you add some yellows in slowly, deciding to think of it as less of a flower study and more of an artistic interpretation so you don't have to use your brain too much. You’ll be using it enough to think through this whole Jungkook thing, no need to get caught up in the details and strain yourself even more.

Carefully put and one by one, more and more colours make their way onto the page and you settle into the calmness of creating. It leaves the open space you need for your mind to finally start working through the whole Jungkook–Yuri, Yuri–You, You–Jungkook situation before immediately correcting that there is no You–Jungkook situation.

He just wants to be friends, and that doesn’t constitute a situation. More of a predicament.

Yeah, that sounds better.

You switch out your brush in favour of a tart after getting base colours down, takinge a hefty bite and chasing it down with more hot chocolate. Damn it’s good, you need to ask Viv what magic she puts in it to make it this amazing.

Another swig and you think it’ll be better to just jump right into your mental debate. Get it over with, hash it all out. 

So that’s exactly what you do.

It isn’t that you do or don’t want to be friends with Jungkook, he seems nice enough.

It’s a matter of if you can be.

Jungkook is probably a very self-disciplined individual—if you knew anything about his upbringing—so it’s not like he wouldn’t understand your drive. He’d probably understand you in that respect more than Yuri does. Why you work so hard, why you don’t slow down. You can’t.

You won't. Not for anyone or anything.

And he can clearly understand social cues so you don’t have to worry about things getting awkward. He would act appropriately, never pushing boundaries—

Using a thin angled brush, you add more yellow to create sharper lines.

—And had he been just Jungkook, you wouldn’t even be sitting here having this ridiculous mental conversation with yourself. Because who stresses this much over a new potential friendship? You certainly never have before.

But that’s the problem, he isn’t just regular old Jungkook.

He is His Royal Highness, Prince Jeon Jungkook.

And as much as his title doesn’t mean shit to you, it sure as hell means a whole lot of something to everyone else.

He’s heir to the biggest kingdom on this half of the planet. On the cover of every teen magazine and online news article. Only child to the King and Queen. 

Powerful. Attractive. Single.

In short, Jungkook has been incredibly well known and incredibly important since the day he was born 24 years ago.

So you have to sit and think out what would happen if you became the prince's first female college friend. Well… aside from Yuri, but you don’t know how long that’s going to last, given where she thought things were going.

Being seen with him publicly would immediately put you in a spotlight you don’t want. You hate being the center of attention, but that’s the least of your worries.

You worry greatly that you wouldn’t firstly be known for becoming ‘YN, globally renowned painter, artist and business woman,’ selling pieces for more than they’re worth and then some. Galleries from all over the world knocking down your door, begging for your work. Having billionaires auction off paintings you’ve done for charity, being flown around the world for and by people to have you create something for them. Be it portraits or murals or even a performance—

Some burnished red now, with a small thin tip brush to begin the rorschach like patterns on the petals.  

—You wanted to be successful by your own hand, and then and only then would you occasionally speak of your very, incredibly platonic, not at all romantic, years old friendship with the prince, who you’d met in your college years by chance.

But you know that if you say yes, if you agree, all of those worries would prove true. That none of it would happen. None of the future you’ve worked for the better part of a decade on would come to fruition.

Oh no, no, no. That wouldn’t be the case at all.

Why would it? If you said yes, you’d become this week's most hot and trending piece of gossip. You’d be ‘the first girl Prince Jungkook was seeing in college,’ and everyone would ask ‘are you his new girlfriend?’ or ‘just a fling?’

If you said yes, it would be a constant barrage of:

‘Where did you meet?’ ‘Is he a good kisser?’ ‘How long have you been dating?’ ‘Have you met the king?’ ‘Does he like you?’ ‘What about the Queen, does she approve?’ ‘Has The Prince mentioned marriage at all?’ ‘Can we see the ring?’ ‘How many children will you have?’

At the grocery store, the mall, the hallways of your school, your hometown, the bathroom of a restaurant. It would be everywhere all of the time, constantly, and your head is already spinning at all the potential bombardment to your currently nice and relatively quiet life, so you take another snack break and stretch. 

Finishing your first tart and making a good dent in your second, the hot chocolate is half gone at this point. Whip cream and marshmallows having long melted, making the drink extra smooth.

Returning to your painting and back on topic; you’re not dense. You know how the media does what it wants with the people they see as mere puppets. As if they aren’t living breathing individuals with lives outside the very narrow-minded, click bait titled, news articles.

Their ‘reporters’ have absolutely no regard for what they say and how they act. They have not a care in the world for what their claims do to all the innocent individuals whose lives they write about after they’re done with them.

Selfish is the nicest word you can think to describe them. They’re vicious, heartless, vile people, and you have no desire to ever be the object of their attention.

The flowers are springing to life beautifully as you put layer after layer of detail. You add some darker hues, deciding to go with a more vivid red rather than the burnished one from before. Your wet on wet approach is working magic on blending the colours seamlessly for you. It really accentua—

—And another thing! If you did say yes, you could just see it now;

After your successful career launch, you’d always—no matter what you did—always be questioned about your relationship and what could have been with the prince. Or you’d be asked if knowing him is what got you to where you were, if he gave you a leg up, so to speak.

As if you would let him have any hand in making you what you were always going to become.

You didn’t and don’t need his or anyone’s help.

But it would always be, ‘YN? Oh you mean that artist got that much recognition just because she knew Prince Jungkook?’ or ‘YN, the Prince’s ex from college?’ no matter how hard he or you pushed that you were just friends. Because who would listen to either of you after the speculation was already there? After the seed was planted in their minds.

People love secrets and thinking they know all the dirty, gossipy scandals more than anything. Thinking they know more about other people's secrets than they do their own. As if they have nothing better to do with their lives.

Sighing, you drink the last bit of hot chocolate, wanting another one once it’s gone, but not the sugar headache that comes with that. Water then.

Adding some dimension to the petals by using a clean, damp brush to remove some pigment, you can’t help but let your mind wander to the most obvious conclusion that would be made and sink into it.  

You’re almost scared of the social pariah you’d become with every other woman and handful of men on campus. One dating rumor and you're done. Gone. Dismissed.

Or worse. One dating rumor and your popularity will suddenly skyrocket. You won’t have another moment to breathe alone so long as you’re still in school.

Jungkook is the most eligible bachelor on this side of the planet, potentially the whole world. His potential matches are princesses and the daughters of the filthy rich.

Who are you?

No one.

At least right now you are.

You aren’t royal, aren’t of ‘noble birth,’ aren’t a wealthy socialite. You aren’t even an independent, wildly successful career woman yet.

You’re just a scholarship kid who’s only at this school because she worked her ass off for it. Who has to continuously work her ass off for it if she wants to continue to be here.  

And you do want to. You want to work hard and become who you’ve always known you’d be. One invisible, important step at a time. 

From the first sketch to the last brush stroke.

So to summarize.

You don’t want to be the media’s plaything. Something for them to have their fun with and be bored of in a week, the future you’re working so hard to create destroyed before ever seeing the light of day. Fizzled out like a candle in a pouring downfall, only smoke remaining from the once bright and proud flame.

Secondly, you don’t want to be the social outcast or new campus favourite simply because you made a new friend. Having either icicles thrown at you from every set of eyes on campus or clout grabbers following your every footstep, begging for attention. Snubbed from any group projects, crowds parting like the red sea at your arrival, or never getting a moment to yourself again, late to every class due to your own personal assembly.

You’re exhausted at the mere thought of the possibility of either.

And lastly, you don’t want all the possible implications that come with knowing and befriending a man like him. Plain and simple.

What you want is to establish yourself because you worked for and earned it. What you want is to be successful, putting your near decade of practice and studying to good use. What you want is to have media attention, but for your talents, your efforts, and accomplishments.

Not his.

Not because you happened to treat the second most important person in your country like a normal, regular person.

Like he’d asked literally everyone else on your campus to do.

It isn’t your fault you're the only one who has ears that work.

But…on that note…

This is the prince.

And you are his citizen under his family’s monarchy. 

You don’t know if you’re even allowed to say no.

Can you?

He said you could…or was that him just giving you the illusion of choice? Don’t you have to listen to him? By royal decree or whatever it was that forced people to live under the royal family’s rule?

You have no idea, and choose to sit on it some more. There has to be a better solution to this.

You wish you could just talk to Yuri. She’s been your sounding board for the better part of two years now. But that’s definitely a no-go after today. You worry what bringing up anything prince related would do to your friendship right now. You’ve had enough arguments and mental taxation for the time being, thanks.

And if not Yuri…You would talk to Nel…

But Nel’s in a completely different country—a completely different time zone—right now. Already halfway through his night and you don’t want to wake him.

Wait, Nel.

Fuck.

Nel is another thing you have to consider in all this. You aren’t sure how he’d react to any form of relationship you’d have with Jungkook. 

How would he react to the media’s coverage of you with the prince?

Would he believe you when you denied everything?

Five years is a long time.

To know someone. To love them. To trust them. And you both know where you stand. You know where your future lies; with him. And he knows his lies with you.

But Nel is only human, and every human has flaws. No one is perfect. Everyone can have moments of weakness. Every person can feel jealous no matter how secure the relationship.

And jealousy can kill a relationship just as quickly, if not faster than anything else.

Jealousy can make you think things so irrational that it breaks down the wall of trust you built on a foundation of cement and bricks like it was nothing more than two twigs being held up by sheer luck and willpower alone.

A horrible rumor. 

A gust of wind. 

What’s the difference?

Five years of love, trust and communication could crumble to dust because of some asshole with a camera, an angle, and a computer with an internet connection.

You don’t want that to happen. You cannot express fervently enough how badly you never want something like that to happen to you or Nel.

You love your relationship. You love Nel, and you can’t do anything to jeopardize that. Ever.

But surely he’d understand if the heir to your nation's throne asked you to be his friend.

Surely he’d believe you when you told him that absolutely nothing was going on between you and Jungkook and that the media is just having a field day because he was the prince, and you were a girl around his age.

Surely he would…

Surely…

Five years is a long time.

But it’s also short. If you consider that for just over two of them you were long distance 9 months out of the year. And that two and a half more of them were when you were in highschool doing 60 hour weeks while he had football practice before and after school every day.  

When you spent most of your weekends at galleries, or portrait study or cramming for a test.

When he spent his studying and practicing and catching up on all his lost sleep from practice.

Maybe…

Maybe you shouldn’t bring it up to him.

A fire can’t start where there isn’t any kindling…right?

An argument can’t start, mistrust can’t begin, jealousy can’t exist if he just…never knows about it.

If nobody knows about it.

Actually.

Maybe that’s exactly what you’ll do. Just not tell anyone.

It’s not lying, not really. It’s just omitting a very, very small part of your life. 

And it’s not like you’ll be doing anything bad. It would most likely just be Jungkook asking about where to bring girls on dates or if you’ve seen the newest tv show that’s been on.

You’d tell him Azorè’s is the restaurant closest to campus that’s actually nice, and that no, you haven’t, because you don’t watch a lot of TV if you can help it.

That’s not devious, it’s normal friend stuff—just without the immense social pressure and potential repercussions of knowing him and being female at the same time.

Holy Shit.

This might be crazy enough to work.

And this way… this way you don’t have to say no to Jungkook, and Yuri won’t be mad, and Nel won’t get jealous, and you’ll stay out of the spotlight.

This way works out for everyone.

This way solves everything.

You huff, relieved. 

Now you just have to convince the prince that it’s a good idea.

He’s used to omitting things, isn't he? He must because of his future job. Don’t they train future monarchs in the wise and ancient art of social deception and secret keeping—to keep the peace or whatever?

You don’t think it’ll be that big a leap for him.

The longer you ruminate, the more you like the idea, deciding that when you get back to your dorm later, that’s what you’ll tell him. And if he doesn’t like it, well then problem solved all around anyway.

You reach for your hot chocolate, remember it’s empty, and switch to your water instead. Celebrating by mentally patting yourself on the back.

Always trust the greenhouse cafe. The greenhouse cafe is good. The greenhouse cafe is wise. The greenhouse cafe is all kno—

“That’s beautiful.”

You almost jump out of your seat at the voice, knee hitting the table in the process. It makes everything on it bounce and clang loudly and the hand holding your brush that was also nearing your water flies to your chest, leaving a splotch of red paint on your cheek.

“Ow, fuck,” you say, reaching to rub your now throbbing knee. That’s going to bruise. You’re just lucky nothing spilled, you certainly hit the table hard enough.

Looking up to see who your unintentional heart attack provoker was, you blink a couple times before a worried looking Jungkook with big eyes comes into focus.

Though, his worry is brief it seems, as his attention shifts to the painting in front of you, the small smile from the day you met making an reappearance.

Didn’t he just see you jump ten feet in the air? Because of him???

“What the fuck Jungkook?! You scared the shit out of me,” you say scowling, giving him a piece of your mind while your heartbeat returns to a healthier pace. “Didn’t they ever tell you not to sneak up on people in that big, fancy house of yours?”

Jungkook doesn’t think he’s ever heard anyone call the palace a ‘big, fancy house’ before. Another first with you. And he’s about to say as much when his gaze finally meets your own and see’s how upset you are. Right, he spooked you.

The hand not holding a laptop into his side slides behind his neck and he looks away. You swear you can see the prince blushing.

Did you cause that?

Wait.

Stop.

Rewind.

You look him up and down quickly.

Hoodie. Hat. Laptop. Mask around his wrist.

Jungkook was the guy sitting on the patio from earlier? How did you not recognize him? Like at all?

He has the most famous face in the world and you couldn’t recognize it when it was 20 feet away?

Wow.

Actually.

Hat to hide the hair, hoodie to hide the body, mask to hide the face. 

Impressive. He really knew how to blend in when he wanted too.

But he hasn’t even said hi or sorry. And he undoubtedly saw you earlier as you weren’t exactly subtle in placing your things on the table.

So much for wanting to be friends. He can’t even say hello to you?

...or maybe you got lucky and he saw that you really didn’t want to talk to anyone.

Thoughts aside, you won’t admit to him you find his camouflage techniques exceptional. He doesn’t need the ego boost.

Jungkook's hand recedes from his nape and he looks at you again, blush almost gone.

“Ah.. sorry.” He cringes a little. “I’ve always been told I’m light on my feet and I constantly forget when I’m around new people. I didn’t mean to scare you. Sorry, YN.”

So his manners haven’t completely escaped him. 

You give him a hard time as you point a finger his way. “You’re paying the hospital bill if my kneecap’s broken.”

It only takes a second for the joke to land this time, and a small laugh escapes his lips.

“Yeah, that’s fair. You break it, you buy it?”

It’s the first joke you’ve heard him make, and honestly, it isn’t bad. You chuckle.

“Something like that, sure. Here,” you say, holding the canvas up a little higher for him to see. “It’s a Yellow Tiger Orchid. The greenhouse likes to switch around the plants every other week, but these guys are always my favourite. Make for a fun challenge.”

Jungkook's loose hand touches the edge of the canvas lightly, careful not to disturb the still drying paint.

His words are almost thoughtless, entirely too focused on your work as he says, “You’re incredibly talented, your parents must be so proud.”

“Parent,” you correct, not harshly, just so that he knows you’ve only got the one. “And thanks, it stems from my many years of practice and a shady deal with an even shadier witch. All I know is I owe her my first born.”

That smile of his makes a comeback, only bigger and followed by a snicker.

You match it.

“But yes, my mother’s incredibly proud and a large part of the reason I’m here, never once having stopped supporting my goals.”

That’s true. Very true. Your mum never once thought your dreams were out of your reach, only ever pushing you towards them where she could. Placing steps down for you where she was able to.

She signed you up for lessons, drove you to galleries, bought you book after book on all your favourite artists and painting techniques. She got you paints and palettes and canvases, and did everything she possibly could have to get you where you now are.

She’s your number one fan.

And, in true proud mom fashion, she told everyone she could about how her daughter got into RABFA on scholarship all by herself—except you didn’t. You’re here because of all the support she gave during those years as well as your efforts, but she refuses to take any of the credit.

“I’m happy to hear it,” he says genuinely, before hesitating. Looking like he wants to say something but is debating it. “Can I–Do you–,” he inhales deeply,  clearly not used to fumbling over his words.

It’s...cute.

“Would you mind if I sat down?” he finally gets out. “I’d love to see more of your work.”

You think about it only for a second, taking a quick scan of your surroundings. There’s no one around besides Viv, and she’s probably working in the back. Plus, you're pretty sure he’s seen or even spoken to some of the greatest artists of your time. Not to mention, you’d love to hear his input.

“Yeah, sure.”

Instead of sitting on the chair your bag is currently using, he puts his things on the table to your right and spins one around from there, settling down with arms folded over the back of it.

“Thanks.”

You hand over your sketchpad. A perk to using a heavily water based medium is that your painting’s already dried in the time since you first spoke.

Jungkook flips his way through the pages slowly, taking his time in studying each painting as an individual piece. It’s not long before he reaches the one you were working on today. Having just started this pad a month ago, there isn’t much in it yet.

He searches back through to one right near the beginning.

“This ones my favourite,” he says, spinning the canvas around for you to see. It’s a tiger lily painting you’d done late in the summer at home.

Your mother is a notorious gardener, and has several flower beds that could rival a plant nursery with the sheer size, magnitude and variety of flowers in them. 

Rose bushes, dahlias, sunflowers, snap dragons, carnations, tulips, daisies, chrysanthemums, you name it, they were there.

So it wasn’t uncommon for you to spend an afternoon out in the garden sketching different blooms or picking one out in particular to paint.

She’d gotten the bright orange tiger lilies this past spring. They were the first ones you’d chosen when you got home after second year to paint. And then you just didn’t stop. They take up about a quarter of your summer sketchbook.

You couldn’t help it. They were hypnotizing.

“Why that one?”

“It’s my birth flower,” he says, lifting the sleeve on his right, revealing a forearm full of wonderfully inked designs. At the center of it is a tiger lily in matching bright orange hue. “It’s always had significant meaning for me because it’s something that represents me that didn’t come from my lineage, position, or name.”

“Oh.”

You sit there for a moment, stunned, yet to release your gaze from the sight of his arm.

The designs that cover it go all the way up to his elbow and don’t stop.

From an artist's point of view, you’re incredibly impressed with the quality of the work. Intricately placed mixes of black, white and colour. Never one or the other for too long. Strong clean lines. Clear, unmuddied colours. Striking.

Beautiful.

You shouldn’t be so surprised, knowing only the best would be allowed to grace his skin, but still. It was rare you were this taken aback by art. 

The colours chosen on the more visual pieces are gorgeous together. Bright, brilliant, bold. And the few quotes mixed in? Their linework is just… spectacular.

Jungkook doesn’t seem to mind your staring, twisting his arm to show you some of the designs previously hidden from your sight. 

The quality doesn’t lessen.

It’s after you're done intaking the art on his body that you see the strong muscle underneath it. And you let yourself appreciate the discipline that goes into achieving said strong muscle instead of how it makes your mouth water.

Long distance does not help your libido, and you’re only human.

Not that you would ever cheat. You do have a functioning moral compass, and a person you love that you could never do that too in a hundred years.

It's just that you have working eyes... and it doesn't hurt to look every now and then.

To make sure everything’s still working.

It is.

You bring your line of vision back into his.

“I never thought of my birth flower like that before. My mom keeps an entire garden full of them—only child and all.” Like him, you realize. “They’re one of her favourites too. I guess they hold a similar importance to her as yours does to you.”

Jungkook nods as he asks for your birth flower and you tell him. He says he can understand why your mum would be so fond of them, they’re a beautiful and elegant flower, suiting for you.

“Thanks,” you say, brushing off the subtle compliment.

He holds a hand out for the pad and you give it to him, watching as he turns the pages to another drawing before returning it again.

This one’s of your mother, in the small breakfast nook by a window in your home. It’s drawn with dark pencil lead and painted loosely, a slight blending of the two mediums.

She’s drinking a cup of tea and reading a book. It’s one of your favourite pieces that you’ve done recently because it’s your mom, existing naturally.

Not posed for a portrait, or a painting, or a reference, just her enjoying her morning. You couldn’t help but sketch it quickly when you saw her, adding the bit of colour later.

“Is this her?” he asks, taking it in again as if seeing it for the first time.

“Yeah, that’s our breakfast nook. But she reads there more than eats, always saying the window lets in the perfect amount of light.”

“I see where you get it from.”

“Get what?” but he just smiles at you before switching the topic.

“Who do you draw inspiration from, or look up to? I’d guess but I only know the bigger names.”

You inhale, knowing that this answer is always long for you. You get it semi-regularly—it’s a part of being a visual artist the same way asking a musician who they look up to is.

“Well, there’s a couple bigger names in the mix,” you start, “Van Gogh comes to mind first because his work feels like freedom. Lines placed seemingly wherever, yet so meticulously put at the same time. Some aren’t like that, but even then, they still flow like water. I adore his work,” another breath. “Da Vinci. Always. I stand by that fact that he was a genius and I strive to have an ounce of whatever he did. Michelangelo is another. Enough said. The sheer magnitude he was capable of creating was incredible.

“I have a lot of smaller artists I love too. People I’ve seen at local galleries, people I’ve found online, teachers from past classes. Some not nearly as well known artists from a hundred years ago who broke the barriers of art in their time,” you’re smiling like an idiot as you recall all your favourites and how they inspire you.

“I like the people who create and created just because they could, because they loved to. Because it meant something to them to make something with their hands. I mean, look what their passion got them. They all created for themselves, perfected their craft for themselves and that was enough. A satisfying, fulfilling life. I can only hope to have that. But a part of me wants to be one of the lucky few. The ones who shared their art so that others might not feel so alone. They became some of the greatest artists of all time.”

“Also some of the saddest,” Jungkook adds. But he’s looking at you differently now. You can’t put your finger on it but it’s not bad. Something close to curiosity. Or wonder.

“That just goes hand and hand with being a creative person. I don’t know a single one who doesn’t express their pain through their art.”

“Do you?”

“Of course, but those are just for me.”

“Shame.”

That catches your attention. “Why?”

Jungkook doesn’t hesitate for a second before saying, “Because some of the most beautiful things in life are created out of pain.”

You don’t really know how to respond to that.

You know he’s right. People are most likely to bare their soul into their art when they’re hurt, just to get it out. It’s cathartic for them in the same way crying or breaking things is for others.

The most magnificent things can come from that vulnerability, and it isn’t something you ever take lightly when you’re shown.

You’ve heard enough music in your life to know that the most beautiful songs are the most gut wrenching. You’ve seen so many dance performances you know the ones created from anguish and heartbreak are the ones that make for the most delicate movements; the most fragile moments on stage. You've painted enough pieces in grief over your lifetime to know that when someone doesn’t hold back what they’re feeling when creating, it’s the most emotionally provoking when looked at, listened to and experienced by others.

The audience can feel it in a piece. They can feel it in the movement and in the melodies. In the soul of what was created. Of the creator.

“Yes, they are,” you agree, near solemn, and that’s all that needs to be said.

And a moment of comfortable silence later, he hands you back the pad and you pick up your brush to continue with your orchid.

He watches your every stroke. You pretend he’s not there as you add green to the leaves.

“Have you given any thought to our earlier conversation?” he asks. “I know it was only a couple hours ago, so I understand if not.”

Jungkook looks nervous when you wash your brush in the colorful water jar. His face reads like he thinks you’re going to say no, like he’s preparing himself for the rejection but his body language gives him away. He’s wringing his fingers under the table, and his leg won't stop bouncing. 

It makes the corner of your mouth quirk. You thought he’d be better at hiding his tics, being prince and all.

But maybe he feels like he doesn’t have to around you.

Meanwhile, on the other side of the chair, Jungkook feels like he’s sweating buckets. Unknowingly showing every nervous habit he has, but can’t help it. 

He doesn’t tell you that he doesn’t have a lot of friends. Doesn’t have a lot of people he trusts enough to even consider them friends.

Yeah, he’s always surrounded by people. But they were just that. People. He barely knew any of them, and they only ever wanted to be near him for what it said about them, for what being near him could give them.

He doesn’t say how can’t pinpoint it, but that there’s just something different about you. 

So he’s really hoping you say yes.

Because it’s been…a long while…since he’s made a new one.

And it would be really nice too. 

But he’ll respect your decision either way.

Just please say yes.

Mercifully, you end his suffering.

“I have,” a brush stroke—more yellow. You don’t look at him while you speak, focusing instead on what’s in front of you. “That’s actually why I came here. To think. I come here for that a lot, or to get work done. It’s my favourite spot on campus. Secluded, pretty, quiet.”

He silently agrees with every word, but is also impatient. “And?”

You try your best to ignore the stars in his eyes when you look up from your painting.

“And I’ve thought hard about this, Jungkook. I didn’t just once over the idea and choose on a whim, I fleshed out what it would mean for me—what a friendship with you would mean for me, that is,” putting the brush down, you allow your most recent details to dry. “And I have a condition—just one. It's one you may not like, but it’s the only one you’d have to agree to in order for me to agree.”

Jungkook deflates a little, wondering what you could want. Because everyone always wants something. He was just really hoping you’d be different.

His mind runs through all the possible answers he’s used to hearing; money, clout, pictures, gifts, vacations, an audience with his father, donations, sex, power, the list goes on. 

He doesn’t want to think these things about you, but he can’t help it.

After so long… you get used to it.

“What’s the condition?” he asks, bracing himself.

“That nobody knows we’re friends.”

What? He thinks.

“What?” He asks.

You inhale again, wiping your hands on your pants and straightening your back.

Here we go.

“The more I thought about it, the more I realised that being seen with you publicly all the time would not go over well for me and my future. Anyone can be seen with the prince, but one girl over and over? People will talk about me. And it will be about me, because I’ll be the new shiny toy for them to play with. What I’m wearing, if we’re dating, who am I, what do I do, how did we meet, are you interested, blah blah blah,” you flick your hand, cringing at all of it. “I also don’t want my current relationships to change because of it. I don’t want my mother being cornered in a grocery store by a stranger asking about how her daughter knows Prince Jungkook and if she’s willing to give a quote,” you may actually come close to murder if that ever happened. 

“Not to mention the social repercussions. I can deny everything all I want from here into next week, but the second anyone knows we’re friends? I’ll become  either the most popular girl on campus—which is a waking nightmare for me—or the campus leper, which is a close second. And before you say anything to the contrary,” you fix him with a hard stare, unwavering. “You know I’m right.”

He tries to speak but you hold up a finger to show you’re not finished, and take a deep breath. 

Collect yourself YN, sum it up, drive the point home.

“I don’t need nor want that in my life. So if you want me to be in yours, nobody will know except us and whatever royal people need to so I don’t get tackled for being near you.” He cracks a smile at that.

“If that isn’t okay with you, then that’s fine, I understand. It’s probably an ask you’re not used to hearing, but I hope you understand that I have to put myself first and that this is a hard boundary for me. I’ve worked too hard to get where I am and I won’t let anyone get in my way. Not even a prince,” you say. “Not even you.”

Jungkook waits a second this time, making sure you’re finished. Then leans back, deep in thought, eyes still trained on you. 

He’s never been so impressed with anyone in his life. 

It’s been a very long time since he’s met someone with such blatant, hard earned self respect. Such candor and veracity, who spoke to him with confidence, completely unwavered. Let alone a woman. 

He’s so used to the fawning that he’s forgotten he likes it when a girl has backbone. Forgotten he likes a girl who doesn’t bend because he asks her to, who doesn’t need him or anyone to get what she wants. 

She can do it herself.

If he’s completely real with himself, his pants are fitting a little tighter as he remembers. As he continues to stare into your unflinching eyes.

But he dismisses that feeling immediately.

He should have known better. You’ve always been honest with him up until this point, sparing as those moments were. So he shouldn’t be as astonished as he is; you’re the one that has yet to break pattern.

Yuri’d fed him piece after piece of information about you. How you almost never leave your dorm when not in class, how you’re always studying or practicing all hours of the day, how school is your number one priority above all else—she really liked to talk.

He should’ve known you wouldn’t let anyone get in your way—not even him—given how the first time you met, you told him point blank that you would’ve rather been in the library than be forced to see him talk. 

Confident and direct from the very start. Unwavering in your goals. 

Jungkook should have known when you said you had a condition, that you didn’t want anything from him, but privacy for you.

You are young, driven, smart, and beautiful.

He’s never wanted someone to be in his life more.

Fuck.

He shifts in his seat, primarily for comfort, but also to buy a bit more time. You’ve yet to break his gaze.

Yes, it is a strange request, and yes it isn’t one he’s ever gotten before, but he can work with it. He understands your need to not be in the public eye. To not have your image decided by the public for you.

Most importantly, he knows what being seen with him can do to a person via the media. It’s terrifying. They’re like vultures, ready to pick the flesh off of any victim they deem fit.

More than one woman has been slandered off the palace grounds because of it. He also should have considered that before asking, but like he knew—like he knows—you’re smart. There’s no reason why you wouldn’t have thought this through thoroughly enough to weigh upon all of the possible outcomes.  

It was a day full of realizations. On both your parts is what he didn’t know.

So he really, seriously should not be as stunned, surprised and…still partially hard as he is. 

Here you are, staring at him, expecting a reply while his mouth is slightly parted and apparently speechless. It’s rare for him to be given such a harsh truth instead of the immediate yes he is so used to hearing. For someone to have this kind of power over him.

When he’d asked you, Jungkook had just wanted a friend. Someone to talk to, maybe hang out with, share jokes with. Someone to spend time with so his college experience isn’t as lonely as it’s turning out to be.

But where he saw a potential friendship, you saw potential disaster.

Because as much as the title grants him, being Prince isn’t a great thing for everyone around him.

Sometimes it destroys them.

He’s still learning though, that you aren’t just smart. You’re calculated. 

You are a scythe in a field of grass, a gust of wind in a foggy gulf, a sunbeam shining through the clouds on a rainy day.

You think things through to their every possibility, finding the best outcomes and worst fallouts. You did it with his request, and managed to find a solution that works at only a small hindrance to him.

So who the hell would he be if he didn’t take it?

The outside world already knows all of his friends. Granted about 95% of them are men, but that’s what you get when you grow up having the sons of the guards, groundskeepers and chefs around. The other 5% are the girls he met during childhood, the daughters of other royals and titled individuals.

And even then with them, the speculation never stopped. Not after years of platonic friendship. There was always a ‘what if?’ thrown onto them. So he understands that if he starts hanging out with a new girl, the media will go wild. Understands that existing in the same place as you and his social etiquette towards you have the power to make or break you, mentally, socially, even physically.

He understands.

So, everything considered?

Your one condition isn’t so bad after all.

And he has no problems with it.

“Agreed.”

You blink, clearly not expecting him to give in so quickly, or to at least debate it. Your eyebrows scrunch as you sputter, “Just like that?”

He grips the back of the chair, and leans forward again.

“I would never expect you to give anything up or be forced into an unwanted narrative because I asked you to be my friend. Of course I agree. It’ll be nice to have someone I don’t have to worry about the press bashing. To have someone normal, who I can be normal around, and who will, clearly, call me out on my shit or set me straight when I need it. So yeah,” he sucks a tooth, “Just like that.”

You flinch a little at his words. “Wait I lied, I have one more condition.”

He’s intrigued, especially considering the look on your face. “Go for it.”

“You can’t throw me in a dungeon for calling you out. My safety needs to be assured for any and all potential verbal ass whoopings you may receive in the future.”  

A full, loud cackle sounds from Jungkook, eyes crinkling as he says, “Deal.” And holds out his hand.

“Deal,” you say, shaking it and laughing with him. Because you know there aren’t any dungeons in the palace.

And somehow, you know that even if there were, he still wouldn’t.

Chapter Four: Sunday Nights and Lost Memories

A/N 2: we do be getting into though.

A/N 3: I know I’m jumping ahead here but I’m excited for you guys to read chapter 4, it’s one of my favourites so far!

<- Back

[pbjelly90]

I’m rewatching/rereading or checking out for the first time a lot of Sherlock media lately and after seeing the teaser for Knives Out 3, it’s got me thinking about fictional detective characters. I haven’t thought this through completely, but I was trying to decide how I’d rank my favorites throughout various mystery and crime media.

Of course I’m also happy to hear anyone else’s plugs for their favorites I’ve overlooked or not seen before too, so share if you’ve got ‘em and you happen to see this! Would love to see more female led detective stories and queer detective stories.

I’m thinking off the top of my head that my top 15 or so list goes something like this (might end up making this a top 20 or more as I keep adding to it lol) -

1. Sherlock Holmes - This is pretty obvious given the very few things I’ve posted about and my reblogs. The detective that truly got me into mystery stories about 20 years ago. I started reading a collection of the original stories I came across at a Borders bookstore and got hooked from there. I think Watson is what really sold me on Holmes, he humanizes him, givens him more of an emotional anchor. I also have always appreciated how flawed he is. Some genius characters are over the top, but he’s always had some genuine struggles like his drug use. And in the books he even admits Mycroft is better than him at deduction, just lazier with the legwork. My current favorite incarnations may be the original from the books and the Yuumori version, but credit due to the BBC version because I was obsessed the first two seasons in. I love that he’s in the public domain so we can get so many creative takes on him and his world and stories. I’ve been to the Holmes museum at 221 B Baker Street in London (an address they made just for the museum) and seen the statue of him honoring Sir Arthur Conan Doyle in Edinburgh. One of my top favorite fictional characters of all time. If you mention he’s in something, chances are, I’m gonna read/watch it.

2. Harry Dresden - Should probably be no surprise that as a fantasy and mystery fan, I’m a big fan of novels that started off as private detective stories with a wizard on the case. The series gets away from its detective roots later on in favor of bigger plots, but I always enjoyed seeing Harry mix workmanlike detective methods with practical magic. He’s no genius, but he’s clever and willing to mix it up sometimes to see what shakes out. I’d like to think Marcone is the closest thing to his version of a Moriarty, his criminal counterpart. There’s a grudging respect of sorts there even if they dislike the other’s methods. I love Harry and his stories so much I went to Chicago years back just to geek out at some spots from the books (and see Sue!) so he definitely deserves a spot on this list.

3. Ron Kamonohashi - This is a very close race between him and Benoit Blanc, but Ron wins out. He’s got a Watson like character with Toto, which I always appreciate (let Benoit’s hubby come along sometime?) and he’s very Sherlock coded with his little quirks (black sugar syrup is his drug lol) and dependence on mysteries for mental stimulation. Also his dynamic with the police. I enjoy his relationship with Blue and the characters from the academy very much. And I’m very curious to see how the Moriarty connection plays out. He’s just such a silly and I wish the manga was out in physical form in English, I love him and he’s my blorbo. He feels like Sherlock from an Ace Attorney game even more than Herlock Sholmes from The Great Ace Attorney did. This anime feels very much made for me like Yuumori feels. Also his cat is adorable. 💕

4. Benoit Blanc - I enjoy him so dang much. I’d love to see a book adaptation of Knives Out but I wonder how much of how charm is how well Daniel Craig plays him and how much fun you can tell he’s having. Love his relationship with his hubby, his accent, his dress sense, and how he just stumbles into these intricate mysteries with crazy rich folks (and helps support the women who’ve been wronged by them so they can take matters into their own hands to set things right.) I’m delighted they’re continuing to make these movies. I’d take a graphic novel too if not traditional books.

5. Shawn Spencer - Had to bump everyone down this list, how could I forget about Shawn from Psych? He’s definitely more on the strong personality end for detectives, quirky, more interested in romance, and much more extroverted than many examples. I love his friendship with Gus and also his relationship with his father always gave him more depth. Seeing how his father trained him up from a young age, sometimes at great personal cost between them, was an interesting spin on how a genius detective gained their special skills. Also the show is just so dang fun and silly. As a person, I’d probably find Shawn a bit annoying IRL, but I greatly enjoy his misadventures with Gus to rein him in. Lassie is totally his Lestrade. And Shawn’s last name is a Robert B Parker reference to Spenser, isn’t it?

6. Sam Vimes (and the rest of the Watch) - Vimes only doesn’t score higher here because somehow he feels like more of a cop or protector than detective? His emphasis has never been completely about just unraveling mysteries but more focused on defending Ankh Morpork, especially the common people, and delivering justice. Jingo, Night Watch and Thud are three of my all time favorite books of his, with Night Watch as one of my favorite books of all time. Feet of Clay is probably his main detective turn in my memory, as the later books see him have to take on more of a diplomatic role with different responsibilities. Angua and Cheery get a shoutout here as also being highly competent members of the Watch. Carrot has his moments too. Vimes and the rest of the Watch are notable on this list as the some of the very few ranked who are part of actual law enforcement and not some sort of private consulting detective. The Discworld books and the Watch books in particular were formative reading for me back in my teenage years and further cemented my interest in crime stories (and caring curmudgeon characters like Vimes.) Hugh Laurie would play a great Vimes.

7. Amy Santiago & Rosa Diaz (Brooklyn 99 Squad) - The only other official members of law enforcement on this list so far. Jake gets most of the focus and cases, and similar to Shawn Spencer, I enjoy him as a character even if he’d probably be annoying IRL. Love Terry and Holt as the two leaders and mentors of the squad. But my biggest shoutout here is to Amy and Rosa, I would adore a spinoff with them as the Sleuth Sisters solving cases together. Two skilled, nuanced Latina detectives with their own distinctive, non-stereotypical personalities and an awesome friendship? Yes please. They’re what carries this squad way up the list, even if the cases in this show aren’t usually as complex as some of the others, with the focus more on comedy.

8. Hercule Poirot - Been years since I last read the novels, but I’ve always enjoyed him as a little fussy looking Belgian fellow that folks underestimate. He’s got a different approach from Holmes. He likes a dramatic ending reveal. He always seems like he knows a joke others don’t, has a twinkle in his eye. I devoured a lot of the Agatha Christie stories back in the day, and Poirot’s personality maybe isn’t as strong on the page as Holmes, but I feel that’s more to give the reader a chance to feel like they’re the detective figuring it out alongside him. It’s almost like reading along with a silent protagonist at times in a video game. Part of this is due to the fact that Poirot novels never have one consistent narrator, which allows Christie to do some creative things with the narrator and have them take different roles in the story, but it also means we never really have a POV character who understands and describes Poirot on the same level as Watson does for Holmes (at least not that I remember? Apparently Arthur Hastings is in 7 novels at least but I guess he did not make as much of an impression on me. He appears to be more prominent in the David Suchet TV show.)

9. Conan Edogawa - I never finished Case Closed / Detective Conan because it’s crazy long, but it’s a very nostalgic show for me and I very much enjoyed the many episodes I watched back in the day. Conan is a genius, probably to an over the top degree, but his difficulties in working around being stuck as a kid helped add some stakes and obstacles in his stories and felt very relatable as a younger person interested in mysteries growing up. I wonder if they’d ever consider doing a reboot series someday with much fewer episodes, so we’d get a conclusion without needing to watch over 1,000 episodes.

10. Enola Holmes - A little Mary Sueish and teenage wish fulfillmenty, but dangit she’s fun. Essentially a younger teenaged Sherlock with a touch more people skills? Fighting back against the misogyny of her time period. I have a feeling if she came out back when I was a teen and first reading Holmes, I’d be obsessed. I’m curious to check out her books, I don’t mind if they’re more YA oriented if the mysteries are solid.

11. Ranpo Edogawa (and the whole armed detective agency from BSD) - I love and enjoy Ranpo and he very much has spoiled little brat energy. Fukuzawa as his dad figure brings me much joy. However, I also find him and most characters from Bungo to be over the top geniuses, to the point where they no longer feel very grounded as human. Sherlock often feels still believable to me, that someone could specialize to his degree and be that effective, but the BSD characters have always felt supernaturally competent. But with that aside, they’re also often very fun. Given that Ranpo doesn’t have any other superpowers, unlike other geniuses like Dazai or Fyodor, I can allow “ultra deduction” to be his. But Atsushi and Kunkida feel way more grounded and they’re the heart of this group. Love Yosano and Kenji too. Fukuzawa is my favorite but does little detective work usually, leaving that up to the team. I would have enjoyed seeing Aya and Bram be a detective team within the ADA. 😢

12. Nancy Drew - I read these so long ago but these books definitely contributed to my interest in detective stories growing up. I don’t remember many distinctive traits of Nancy now, but I have to give her credit for nostalgia and sparking my interest in mysteries back then. Has there been a modern day update of these?

13. Spenser - Got into these novels by Robert B. Parker at some point back in my twenties, as they were always mentioned in early blurbs for The Dresden Files as a point of comparison, Spenser crossed with Merlin. Very pulpy detective stories, a lot like the Maltese Falcon. Not the most feminist, got plenty of film noir type tropes, but the mysteries were compelling. I can’t say Spenser was necessarily likable, but he had the workman like detective style you find in Dresden that I appreciated. Not a genius like Holmes, he truly had to stir things up sometimes, make a lot more mistakes, and in general do extra legwork. Wouldn’t mind seeing someone update him for modern day somehow.

14. Anita Blake - Does she count here? I’ve found a sad lack of female detectives, maybe that’s because I’ve largely read older stories in the genre? She, like Dresden, started off more detective (and huntress) and since then has changed. Unlike Dresden however, I gave up on Anita’s series around book 10. I enjoyed her early on although she definitely had some viewpoints I did not agree with, I enjoyed the St Louis setting and urban fantasy elements. I think the Sookie Stackhouse mysteries are in a similar area of the country, also with vampires? Maybe I’ll give those a try.

A tie below perhaps for number 15?

Adrian Monk - I’ve only watched a few episodes of Monk, never got super into it, but he gives me Poirot vibes with how fastidious he is. Eventually I’ll try watching a bit more of this.

Miss Marple - Curious to see how these books compare to Poirot. I started one ages ago but didn’t finish it, got sidetracked. I’ve seen now someone has written a book with characters based on Holmes, Marple and Poe? (Interesting that it’s not Dupin.) Curious to see how that’s handled since Marple I don’t believe is public domain? Some Poirot is, but not her yet to my knowledge.

Auguste Dupin - Read The Purloined Letter, but not the other stories yet that I recall. I don’t remember Dupin himself having any traits that particularly stuck with me, but he is the proto fictional detective so I have to give credit there.

Sam Spade - Similar to Dupin, Sam Spade sets up the proto tropes for his genre of detective story, the more film noir type story. But otherwise he wasn’t super memorable to me, perhaps because he only had the one. Spenser takes a lot of inspiration from him.

Philip Marlowe - Ditto for the above. Read The Big Sleep, can’t recall if there were more that I read? But he helped establish the genre.

Nero Wolfe - I think I have read one of these, but I'll be honest, I don't remember it very well. Probably due to give this series another shot.

—

Honorable mentions: For characters that are not technically detectives by title, but still solve mysteries, or aren’t the lead in their respective stories -

Richard Ranasinghe de Vulpian - I first picked up volume one of the Jeweler Richard light novels because the boys on the cover are pretty, but I bought it because it was described as having mystery elements online and that the two leads would work through cases together. It’s shifted some in focus since then, but Richard is certainly like a detective for jewel related matters. He’s a bit of a Holmes figure, brilliant with specialized knowledge, clever, good at reading people, British, and Seigi is like his warm hearted Watson, good in a fight, deeply loyal. Yet another reason why I love these boys.

Maomao from Apothecary Diaries - Technically not a detective, but she does so much investigating and I love her. Her work sometimes even extends to non-medical cases, she truly has a lot of knowledge but it feels believable with her fixation on medicines / poisons and her upbringing, particularly with her adoptive dad’s mentorship and training. Love hearing her infodump on plants in particular.

All the Ace Attorney lead characters do so much investigating. I recently saw a post that said Phoenix is more of a skilled investigator rather than a lawyer, and they are not wrong. Herlock Sholmes is very silly and I need to finish GAA to really properly judge him, but I’ve seen him invent more than I’ve seen him deduce. I love Ema Skye and would love to see her get her own investigations game, really enjoy seeing her geek out over forensics and working cases once she lands her dream job. Gumshoe is precious but not the best at his job.

Jack Reacher technically doesn’t have a job anymore? But he was an MP and does investigate nearly as much as he fights. I read a fair number of his books when I wanted to learn how to write fight scenes better, and learned some other helpful details while following this series too, particularly about firearms. I like the new Amazon tv adaptation of these stories so far too. Reacher has earned a shoutout here on this list.

The first two Paper Mario games have at least one detective chapter, usually a very silly take on Agatha Christie like tropes, and I enjoy them very much. Give me a full detective spinoff in the Paper Mario world please. Detective Peach from Princess Peach Showtime maybe? Daisy as her Watson? I liked her cases but they were short and the mechanics got a little repetitive, gameplay-wise.

Also in video games, Professor Layton is technically an archaeologist and professor, but he certainly ends up solving quite a few mysteries. I haven't finished all of his games because I'm actually quite crap at a lot of kinds of puzzles, but I enjoy him very much.

House, MD - for a much harsher take on a Holmes like figure, with his own Watson in an actual practicing doctor, Dr Wilson. Ties back into Holmes inspiration coming from a real world medical doctor, Dr. Joseph Bell. I was really into this show for a few years, but House could be so acerbic at times I stopped caring for it as much. Especially when he would be a dick to Cuddy.

Neal Caffrey from White Collar does a lot of investigating and would be a clever detective type in another show, but here as a CI he gives me more Arsene Lupin gentleman thief vibes.

The leads from Cowboy Bebop do have to do a lot of tracking down criminals and investigating, but as bounty hunters, they’re generally after folks who have already been identified as major suspects or convicted, so they don’t quite fall under the umbrella of detectives. Still I love this show and it also added to my interest in crime stories and influenced my writing since I was a teen.

Spy characters in crime stories like James Bond, Twilight / Loid, etc - these guys do some investigation as well, but this is like a whole additional category on its own. Big fan of this genre typically as well, had someone recommend Alex Rider for a YA take on the genre.

I’ll probably continue adding to this post as I think of more fictional detectives to ramble about. 😆

[fictionadventurer]

It's time to start thinking about this year's Inkling's Challenge. There are a few things to address before I make anything official, and I'd like to bounce it off of you guys first.

Interest

Is anyone interested in doing this?

Themes

As in previous years, I'd like to have a list of seven Christian themes for writers to choose from to inspire their stories. This encourages people to think about the Christian element, and provides some guidance without being too rigid. I got the impression that last year's images worked better for people than the previous year's list of Christian concepts. I'm trying to figure out which direction to take with this year's list.

Options include:

Keeping last year's imagery list. Makes it easy for me, but I would like to shake things up to give each year's Challenge a unique feel.

Coming up with a list of new images. My first thought is images that have been applied to God (shepherd, father, king, bridegroom, servant, etc), though that may be too narrow and limit people to stories involving blatant Christ figures. At the moment, I can't think of anything else that goes beyond the major Christian images in last year's list.

Coming up with a new list of more abstract Christian themes. Virtues? Gifts of the Spirit? Books or Sections of the Bible?

I'm open to any ideas that anyone might have because I'm stumped.

Team Chesterton's Technology Category

Each team in the Inklings Challenge gets a fantasy and science fiction genre assigned to it. The split has been pretty even with stories written for Team Lewis and Team Tolkien, but after two years, we've yet to have a single story written for the Technology genre of Team Chesterton. This suggests there's a major problem with the concept, so I should probably switch it up.

The best solution depends on what exactly the problem is. Is the category too broad? Does the title make it seem too technical--like you have to be an expert in technology and write about it realistically? Does it not have a genre attached to it that inspires stories? "Space travel" and "time travel" both suggest going places, which naturally sparks stories. And they evoke certain not-necessarily-hard-sci-fi genres.

There is a possibility that it's chance--maybe Intrusive Fantasy, with its urban fantasy and fairy tale possibilities, is just too appealing to this crowd in comparison to any sci fi genre. But to have no stories in the genre (with Team Chesterton always sparking the fewest stories) suggests a deeper problem.

How to fix it?

Options include:

Choose a category name related to travel like the other two are. There are lots of stories you could tell based on air, land, and sea travel that still involve sci-fi technology (and the concept matches things included in Chesterton's work). But what to call it? "Earth-based travel"?

Choose a certain type of technology to focus on. Say, Biological Technology. Or Robots. This may have some of the same too-technical-sounding problems of the Technology category.

Choose a technology-related subgenre, like Cyberpunk or Steampunk. (Or all the -punks if I could figure out a decent term for it). This still fits Chesterton's work, but may be too limiting or may still not draw writers--after all, these were always options under the original genre category, and no one wrote any.

Any feedback in this area would help.

[understandingbimbos]

So. There's a few things I need to address. My documentation and study of bimbos began as a personal project. I only started a blog because I was putting a ridiculous amount of work and thought into this and figured it should be shared (and still, there's SO much I haven't shared yet...). And that's part of why this blog isn't so well managed, not consistent, and very informal. I write every post with the assumption whoever reading will have some familiarity with the fetish and that was kind of a mistake when dealing with subject matter as delicate as this and if I want to be able to attract literally any other audience. But the blog is here now so its kind of a moot point. I won't be rewriting posts. I want to kill myself every day, its astonishing I can write anything. Anyway, recently I discovered an adult performer named Celestina Blooms, in particular, this video:

We share a lot of the same thoughts. And her criticisms of BimboTok are a lot better articulated. Here are some of things she's said that stood out to me (paraphrased):

"As an actual political movement, the Gen Z bimbo isn't actually very helpful beyond being satire because there are contradictions."

"It makes no sense to be expected to have every single decision in your life, in every area of your life, be a form of activism."

"If you don't spend enough time watching all their videos to completely get the point it looks like they're satirizing the ideologies they're preaching."

"They're kind of taking this thing and being like 'Hey! This thing is leftist because I'm leftist and I said so!' when the thing is still something very tied to a lot of systems of oppression."

"I think there's an issue with saying that being feminine is feminist."

"Because there are so many minors on TikTok they'll come across this trend and see the cute aesthetic and cute clothes, and for good measure, the ideologies a lot of them agree with and be like 'Fuck yes! Sign me up!' and before you know it they're dressing like a bimbo, calling themselves a 'bimbo', and all this stuff while not even being aware of this whole other world of bimbofication as a fetish and unknowingly calling attention to themselves."

She also brings up Pink Bimbo Academy in this video (not by name, and if you somehow see this Celestina, sorry for blowing up your spot!). I bring this up because PBA actually reached out to me like two weeks ago. We had an extremely brief conversation. He lost all interest as soon as he realized my blog isn't primarily about real life bimbos and, like Celestina, I don't believe bimbos are really a real life thing. This is the reason for my last text post (now pinned).

Up until this point I didn't realize Pink Bimbo Academy was a guy, or extremely weird. He's one of those bimbo enthusiasts that genuinely believes every woman should be a bimbo, unless they're trans that is, because according to him a bimbo can't have a penis or possess any "masculine" qualities. He seems to view bimbofication less as a fetish and more of a means to an end. To him, bimbos are the peak of femininity and bimbofication only helps women to become more of who they're "biologically" meant to be. He has entire rants against feminism up on his website and aspires to create an actual real-life bimbo finishing school, like he's a super villain or some shit, like the antagonist of every school-set bimbofication story come to life. And unfortunately, he's basically the resource for bimbofication online. I have to assume not everyone that follows his guides reads all his posts and FAQ but its more than disappointing to have a transphobe be one of the main vanguards of this fetish today.

Anyway, I can't recommend Celestina's video enough. Its a bit long but all worth watching and has made the prospect of writing this book exciting again. I would suggest this video of hers too:

Post-script: After over an hour of writing all of this I realized I actually did something extremely stupid here. Celestina follows me on here, possibly one of the first people to follow me. I kept wondering why one of her icons looked so familiar and it took me until literally just now to figure it out. I hope she doesn't mind the plug, because you all should follow her too!

@celestinablooms Twitter Instagram

[usaigi]

Oh oh so you’re gonna have the Dimileth fic kinda go like Meghan and Henry with the media and tabloids being obnoxiously racist? I’d love to see that!

I don't want to give to many spoilers but so I'll just say kindaaaa.

This story was inspired a bit by Crazy Rich Asian, a bit by Spencer, a bit by Red White and Royal Blue, a bit by the Crown, a bit by my love of gossip and video essay on youtube.

Specially with Red White & Royal Blue, this video I watched joked about how the book felt like it's from the Obama/Hamilton™ era as it is clearly optimistic about government (and by extension, the British monarchy.) We had a black president, gay marriage was legal, Thomas Jefferson had a miku binder, racism was literally over.

I did not want to do that. I know why RW&RB did what it did, queer & poc people deserve our cheesy fictional romcom where we can overlook the horrors of the monarchy/government for the sake of wish fulfillment. If the Straights can have a million hallmark prince charming movies, we should too. But, what I thought was odd was that RWRB did mention how horrible, outdated, and oppressive the monarchy is, and yet Prince Henry still stays in the family? The monarchy just becomes progressive overnight? Storytelling wise, I thought that was an odd choice. Why even mention the horrors™ if you're not going to address them critically? I honestly think that why Yuri on Ice did it better. By just having an alternate world where homophobia(and racism) doesn't exist, you can just have your cute queer/poc romcom.

I have been (trying) to set up that the monarchy is bad, both to its members and because of its ties to British colonialism. Like I strongly believe that you can't just slap a rainbow flag on the monarchy and call it a day. Dimitri's mom was pushed to an extreme and was not given any of the mental health support she needed. Rodrigue tried to comfort Felix by saying that at least Glenn died in service of the Crown (while they were literally doing colonizer things in the Middle East). Rhea's mom was a random civilian killed by loyalists (*cough cough colonizers*) Sitri was forced to go to a residential school to be Christianized and stripped of her culture. Both events are rooted in British colonialism and by extension, the monarchy and its legacy.

I just think it would be irresponsible of me to have Byleth, a half-indigenous half-Irish girl, and not address it. Like irl the tabloids and the monarchy couldn't be normal about Meghan Markle, what would they say about our favorite working class autistic brown rural girl?

Anyway, it will come up soon! (Next chapter will conclude Rhea's story, then some hospital stuff, and then Rufus is introduced? So next three chapters? I don't know how the chapters will break but it's coming)

Thank you for the ask and interest in the story, I love talking about it! :D

[sidewalkchemistry]

Don't Let the Packaging Get to You😭...

this is my follow-up on "2023 Is the Year to Become A Mindful Consumer"

We learn to buy things based on their packaging - the labels, the colors, graphics, etc. It gets both the logically minded and artistically minded alike. Looking beyond the packaging is not a matter of "not judging a book by its cover." It's important to outsmart the package's many ways of crying out "buy me!" Next thing you know, you've come home with a facial serum that breaks you out, a superfood powder that's 85% powdered rice grains, a drink you saw hyped up on TikTok, and a laundry detergent that claimed was "environmentally friendly" but the contents are just like the conventional brands. You might not even realize how many disappointing purchases you make like this. But if they fooled you, they've surely fooled others -- which fuels the company's marketing team to become more convincing & appealing.

First thing to address is your mentality when you enter a store or online shop. Realize that the point of the set-up is to get you to leave with as many products as possible, spending the most money possible, and leave with the thought of as many products as possible in your mind. If you struggle with sticking to just what you need, understand what is it about the store (its layout, employees, samples, etc) which cause you to be so easily convinced.

Next, understand what kind of customer you are. Place yourself in the shoes of a product marketer. What would you put on a package to sell it to yourself? How would you design that package? Who would you sponsor to convince you even further to buy that package? Look at the common denominators between the products you buy. Do you like going for the tried-and-true/popular brand, glam or sleek aesthetics, environmentally-friendly or ethical claims, more affordable option, latest trends, "doctor recommended" claims, or whatever else?

Also, understand what it means to make a purchase. Sure, everyone has heard that we vote with our dollars. But we don't always take full responsibility or power of our positions. Let's say that you like a product's contents except it's watered down with some waste product (like mineral oil), or you know that the company is deluding consumers with its claims & people are getting sick from it, or you learn that a shop aligns its aesthetics to look a lot like a small & mindful boutique but really it's just a normal sweatshop-run production. What can you do? The easiest thing you can do is not buy from that company (buy from a small business with great practices or make it yourself). You can leave reviews which share the truth. You can contact companies to see if they will consider different ingredients, materials, etc. You should talk about the company with others. You can even discreetly move products in a store so that their less noticeable to shoppers (as to decrease their sales. This isn't something petty, but to prevent funding dangerous or unethical items).

Finally, it's always good to have the habit of questioning, "Do I really need to buy this?" This is how mindless consumption really becomes mindful. It's better to find ways to make the product on your own. Normally, we look at the selection of products offered to us and consider, "What among this appeals to me?" Really, most of what we buy has either convinced us that we need it or it is the closest fit to a product which will serve our life. Creating an item which suits you exactly is better by far because it tends to eliminate more of the unnecessary evils and "unknowns" which come with our industrialized products.

Soon, you'll get in the habit of getting only what you need, being more resourceful & creative, seeing through the marketing tactics, learning about what goes into production processes, and finding fun in supporting true artistry & ingenious handmade creations. You'll begin to feel freer and less easily swayed. This is an important piece in taking control over what kind of lifestyle you live and the impact it has.

[lego-man-speer]

It honestly baffles me that some people here apparently seem to have that little knowledge/interest in the Reich's history, like isn't this being a history "fandom" literally the entire point of it?? Like, I totally get it if people want to focus more on particular subsections or figures that interest them the most in their research or in what they post, I do that too, and it's totally okay not to be equally knowledgeable on everything - even actual studied historians have their specialisations, after all - but like ... I think a little bit beyond the most basic knowledge of general Third Reich history should be expected (I say "beyond" because I think the most basic of its history is something that actually everyone should be familiar with regardless of how much it interests you, like that's literally stuff you're supposed to learn in school). And if you don't know something that's not a shame, but take it as an opportunity to educate yourself further? Like, go watch a ww2 documentary or read a book or go on wikipedia - isn't learning new facts and finding out things you didn't know before what makes history research fun? (I don't know though, maybe that's just me because I probably spent wayyy too much time reading the most random wikipedia articles because something sparked my interest and I clicked on one link and then the next and then the next ...)

I honestly kind of get being tired of it, though I personally do not plan to leave the fandom anytime soon, but I also have zero interest getting involved in all the drama (hence I'm also writing this on anon). I'm just planning to stay in my own little corner and focus more on creating educational posts for the future. That being said I take absolutely no issue with the occasional shitpost or meme or jokingly "gushing" (for a lack of a better word) about our historical "favourites", I post those too especially when I don't have the energy for anything more elaborate, but recently I've been kind of missing the educational aspects a bit? By no means I'm expecting everyone to suddenly just post fully researched and cited essays or to write their master's thesis into a tumblr post. But an educational post can even be something more simple, for example a specific historical photo that you find interesting, maybe with a short description about the time, place, context it was taken in. <- This is meant more as an encouragement than a criticism for everyone reading this by the way (and I'm thankful that I'm already seeing these kinds of posts too), because isn't that also where the fun in it lies (if that's somehow appropriate to say it) , exchanging interesting material and info and anecdotes about our favourite historical figures with people who share our interests?

Anyway, I probably trailed off a bit. I hope this wasn't too bothersome, I wasn't sure if I should even say anything about this whole situation. However I thought if I'm already speaking on it, it probably reaches more people through your ask box than if I post it on my own account.

[also just for clarification, I'm using any "you" in this text not to address anyone specifically, but rather as a way of speaking to a general audience]

Your take is very much appreciated anon. And I completely agree with you.

I used to make shitpost content as well but I gradually moved away from it (at least on tumblr) because I didn’t want it to be the main focus of my account (my memes got more engagement than my educational works unfortunately). I’ve never discouraged people from making that content, I just take issue with people who make that the ONLY focus of their content.

Even if people don’t want to write themselves, they should at least engage with the educational side of the fandom (at the very least reblogging the educational content of others if you don’t want to make it yourself). There’s little to no excuse for not being educated or not spreading education in this fandom (especially because of its subject matter).

[edwinspaynes]

My reasons for not liking tessa and will but tessa and jem. I only went through the last hours and the dark artifices. This is partly so I wont spend forever writing this out and partly because I have no idea where to find the short stories that feature will and tessa though I know its at least one. i really like jessa in the short stories so i would have liked to include those.

I should probably first disclaim that in tlh I don’t like how shadowhuntery and not warlocky tessa is. I think its because ive become so used to warlock tessa seeing her not be a warlock is strange, it makes sense in tid and in a way it does make sense in tlh as well but it doesn’t sit right with me. I did my best to make sure this doesn’t impact the comparisons but I thought to let you know for fairness sake.

 I feel like in tlh when tessa and will are together tessa sort of becomes secondary to will or like an extension of him like he will be the main one talking and she will only either just agree with him or come with small comments. That’s also what I mean by muted that’s she’s not really her own character with him but an accessory to his. Meanwhile with jem I feel like she is separate to him, she talks for herself and isn’t only there to prop him up. And also more generally I think the jem and tessa dynamic is more fun than the will and tessa one, like I have a better time reading jessa than wessa. I hope you think this wasn’t too aggressive and I want you to know that I don’t hate will and wessa either, they are quite nice its just I have some problems with them and prefer jessa way more.  

You didn't come across as aggressive at all! I asked. Needless to say, I strongly disagree with most of this - but I think that we also perhaps like different traits in Tessa as well.

I don't find Tessa to feel like her own character at all around Jem, and I feel like she just becomes a prop to him. It's interesting that we see this so much differently, because I don't see any fun/fire/chemistry in that dynamic. They feel like friends to me, and I find that Tessa (in the modern day especially) just goes along with whatever Jem wants. Conversely, I find that she stands up more to Will, gives him a lot of lip and disagrees with and clashes with him a lot. I can't think of a single instance that she's voiced her opinions/needs to Jem outside of his own, while I can point to a million instances where she's bantered with Will or stood up to him when he was wrong.

I do think this is in part a writing problem. Cassie transparently loves Jem and thinks he can do no wrong, so of course no one is really going to clash with him.

I also really like those "small comments," I think, and I find that to be when Tessa is very much herself. She's so snarky and sassy there, which is one of my favourite traits in her and why I love her so much. To me, those little comments referencing books or giving will lip are such an integral part of building her character, and I'm not sure I would love her so much without them.

I also want to address this, because I think it's a huge reason why we view things a lot differently:

I should probably first disclaim that in tlh I don’t like how shadowhuntery and not warlocky tessa is. I think its because ive become so used to warlock tessa seeing her not be a warlock is strange, it makes sense in tid and in a way it does make sense in tlh as well but it doesn’t sit right with me. I did my best to make sure this doesn’t impact the comparisons but I thought to let you know for fairness sake.

Also for fairness' sake, I don't really read or reread the content with "warlocky Tessa" a lot, because I treat TID and especially TLH as the axis of my TSC experience. This is of course not something everyone does or even should do - TMI is objectively the "main series." But I like how "Shadowhuntery" she is because that's the core of my interests and hyperfixation. But I also feel like it's sort of fair to do this with Tessa in TID (not commenting on TLH here) because that's when we see the most of her. So my Tessa, the one I write/engage with, is that "Shadowhuntery Tessa" - because that's who she is in TLH, and I'm a TLH girlie.

Again, thank you for this. You weren't aggressive at all, and I think the beauty of fandom is in large part how two people can read something and interpret it totally differently. That's why I was curious. I hope I wasn't too aggressive, either. My main takeaway from this is that we like and prioritize different traits in Tessa and that makes us prefer one dynamic over the other.

[my-deer-friend]

Ohhohohohoho THE GAYS. Okay so Morton meets Rabenmark in the first chapter of the Germany section, at Auerbach's Celler in Leipzig. (If that name sounds familiar, its from Goethe's Faust. Morton was a massive Faust nerd and ripped off a bunch of stuff from it). There's 2 interesting parts of Morton/Motley's description of Rabenmark. (This is the kind of book where the main character is writing it within the story so the descriptions double as Morton's thoughts). The first one is "In precocity of character, in every respect, [Rabenmark] went immeasurably beyond any person I have ever known" This is interesting as well because it shows that even as a teen, people knew Bismarck was special. When describing his appearence, Morton says "I certainly have seldom seen a more unprepossesing [average] person at first sight, though on better acquaintance, after I had become warmly attacked to him, I began to think him rather well-looking" this is interesting when you consider the timeline. Rabenmark was "an intimate friend of a days growth" and in that time period, he went from average to attractive and Morton became warmly attached. Hmmmmmmmmmmm.

The next gay moment comes when Morton is at a nobleman's party and notices a familiar partygoer. "It was, indeed, fox Rabenmark, but instead of the savage, uncouth student, I saw an elegantly dressed young nobleman, of peculiarly graceful manner and distinguished address. His hair was curled and arranged in a becoming manner and his graceful and very handsome figure was displayed to the greatest advantage in a rich and well fashioned suit" Also I should mention that handsome is also used as a descriptor for a beautiful lady so HMMMMMMMM.

And lastly, the beauty that is the Adieu Forever scene. Rabenmark is in jail after killing 2 people (LONG STORY) and Morton finds out about this. He rushes to the jail and joins some of Rabenmark's other friends as Rabenmark explains what he did to get him in prison. After the explanation, Morton and his friends go to leave but Rabenmark calls Morton back. Rabenmark then throws his arms around Morton and kisses him, then says "we shall never meet again, except for a moment in the judgment-hall [courtroom] to-morrow" to which Morton says "I shall visit you afterwards, I can obtain permission easily" NOT KNOWING THAT RABENMARK IS PLANNING ON KILLING HIMSELF DURING THE TRIAL. Then Rabenmark says "Well, well-perhaps" BECAUSE HE DOESN'T WANT TO BREAK MORTON'S HEART YET, HE LETS HIM LIVE IF FANTASY FOR A BIT LONGER and then says "Adieu! - Morton, adieu for ever!" I am not, and will never be okay about that scene. Its the one good scene that Motley wrote. Its the scene that made me ship them in the first place. Its a thing of beauty.

After reading over this and cackling in delight, I went to poke around in the book a bit and... boy, I think there's some more here to unpack 👀

However, I am in the midst of moving house, so give me a few more days! <3

[kaocat-tatatat]

just read batman #71 and that moment with Tim really pissed me off, and now I am having thoughts about comic book bruce wayne and the direction of his character.

Look I don't mind bruce not being a good parent, in fact I kinda like it, and I understand it's a part of his character complexity (especially in the the canon comics) but ffs it's just really ruins his character for him to be physically abusive. like yeah, doesn't happen often in comics (thankfully) from what I've read but it's happened a few times in the past and recently, so I still see it as a problem rather than a product of the times or whatever, I really don't like it and I'd really wish they'd stop doing it.

a bruce wayne that hits his kids is not my bruce wayne, and I can't see in any capacity how it makes any story with him in it better, or makes his character better. the only thing I can think of that it is useful in is raising stakes and making things more dramatic (for lack of a better term). like there are other ways to show bruce's unstable emotional state and short temper than having him beat his kids.

Since they seem fond of it happening repeatedly though (looking at the time he hit Dick and ofc the way he treated Jason after learning he was red hood to name the first thoughts that come to mind) I need them to address it and for him to face consequences (and learn and grow so he can become the mediocre parent he was meant to be) directly in some form or another soon because it just feels like such a horrible thing to have as a reccuring character trait, one that is displayed over multiple stories by multiple writers, and just not resolve it or develop it much? like inxmost cases they at least recognise its wrong, and maybe they even have bruce deal with it individually- but never all at once and never with him actually dealing with the consequences and changing for the better.

I mean I have tried, but imo not very well and considering hoe it pops up again and again, it doesn't last long. I do have hope though, post gotham war (and now with failsafe), I think writers have been trying to in some way have that happen. Bruce loses his wealth, money, hand, and his relationships with his children are frayed after being taken over by zur-an-arth, and has to work to get to it back. then he has to fight failsafe, and then he finally gets clarity, with what things have been building up to, with the clone situation. of course, with the ending of the most recent arc has him get to have a new beginning, with bruce getting his money back, a new house, and potentially having his children live with him again. he faced consequences for hurting people through his actions and mental state and then has to build himself up again, and finally he gets to have a redemption arc and a second chance. while I don't think it has been done in the best way (there are high highs and low lows), I can see what they are going for and hope they are taking it the direction I think they are, and finally having bruce gore to be a better parent.

i am upset it hasnt exactly been direct, which makes me worry om reading into things wrong, but its a step in the right direction, and i feel that its possible comic book bruce wayne may actually take a second chance?? don't get me wrong bruce has had plenty of second chances thrown at him by the narrative, and while I think personally that this comes a bit to late, if my reading of the recent comics and there overall themes is correct then we may, may have bruce not be physically abusive anymore ( or less emotionally abusive too, ideally)

in conclusion: let bruce wayne have character growth, permanently (I have hope, aka, I am coping) AND STOP HAVING HIM BEAT HIS CHILDREN!!! HE IS PRONE TO HURTING THE PEOPLE HE LOVES THE MOST BUT THAT DOESNT MEAN HE SHOULD PURPOSEFULLY LAY HIS HANDS ON HIM!!

I might expand on this with why so many writers choose to write him this way, where i think it comes from, and ehy i still think him being physically abusive is bad for his character and (not OOC per say because its happened too many times and in multiple points in history for it to be) but rather, just a poor take on his character, but it's currently 1:35 in the morning where I am and the only thing keeping me awake is my poor decision to hyperfixate on bruce fucking wayne of all characters, so I must pay the price