#there was more to this doodle but I can't finish anything anymore

[yandereshingeki]

Milk, Honey, and Sugar

Yandere Eren x Reader

Milk Honey and Sugar Masterlist

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Word Count: 12.7k

Content: College AU, Yandere content, Obsessive and Possessive behavior, Fluff, Smut, Dark content, Jiyuu beloved

Content Warnings: Stockholm Syndrome, Obsessive Behavior, Eren is a bit of a pervert, but somehow also shy about it, reader going thru it, Eren is described at taller than reader, Pet names (Angel, Baby), Dubcon (from stockholm syndrome), Eren is SO WEAK TO YOU, you’re both a bit shy, Reader is implied to be a tiny bit insecure, Tiddy sucking, Falacio, hand job, Little bit of subby! Eren but only a little, description of Eren’s dick lol, reader makes him CRY, mention of him pulling their hair a little, a smidge of edging, aftercare

Summary: After the realization hits that you aren't ever going to see your friends again, Eren is the one to comfort you—slowly turning you more and more dependent on him.

Oh my goddd It's been so long and I'm so sorry!!! A bunch of things got in the way of me writing for a while, but It's finally back! I'm going to try to focus on this series more so hopefully, there won't be such a big gap in posting again! I already have the next part nearly finished so it shouldn't be long before the next chapter! Also, I'd like to say thank you to anyone that's still here after my absence and anyone that's been here from before :,,) I'm so grateful. I hope this is enough to satisfy until the next chapter! There's a little doodle at the end for you all <33 Can't wait to write the most exciting parts of the story!! (In my opinion at least, lol) Please enjoyy

Chapter 7: Warmth (part 1)

The hours grew longer the more days you spent alone.

Your world was quiet, apart from the tick of the plastic analog clock or the occasional sound of water going through pipes and creaking footsteps from above. Being stuck on your own was such a lonely, stir-crazy existence. The only time you found solace from it was when Eren would make his way down the stairs, greeting you with his abnormally gentle smile and a soft kiss, giving you the company you constantly longed for and sometimes a consoling meal.

He had you wrapped around his finger by now, so tired of the isolation and quiet that you’d do almost anything if it meant he’d stay, just to ease your loneliness for a while. He was a distraction you took with little resistance because you didn’t want to think about the pain of being trapped for even a second.

He seemed to be the only thing that helped your ever-fragile mood, the one thing keeping you grounded as your mental stability frayed. It was hell when he would leave you, forcing you to face the cold basement alone again. You’d try to sleep through it, but sometimes your brain wouldn’t quiet and your emotions would explode to the point that you’d bawl your eyes out and sob until your nose was clogged and your head ached, your mind plagued with the overbearing thoughts of your long-gone friends and freedom. If they’d been looking, you were sure they would have found you by now. It should’ve been so obvious who’d taken you. Or maybe, everyone was too trusting of Eren to realize that deep down, he was an obsessive stalker, someone who kidnapped his best friend. 

Either way, your hope of being found had almost completely diminished. With no access to the outside world, you didn’t even know if a search was ongoing. You had no motivation anymore, even for escape—although it’s not like you could because Eren hadn’t let you go upstairs since your last attempt. He hadn’t touched you the same way he did that night either, occasionally letting his soft kisses grow more heated but never going as far as he did then. You almost missed it. The intimacy, that is. He’d been nothing but sweet to you most of the time, even when all you could do was cry into him.

You felt pathetic being in such a state, constantly switching between craving his presence and despising him for taking you away. You barely felt deserving of being rescued since you gave in to your captor so quickly. Would anyone even want to help you if they knew what you’d done with him? How close you’d remained even after his betrayal? It brought a sick feeling to your stomach whenever you thought about it. All of the lame excuses and blaming your actions on your once adolescent crush or your dwindling will to escape. You knew the truth, yet you still didn’t want to admit it.

It’d been four weeks since your failed escape, and just a little over a month of being stuck in the basement—not that you even knew the specifics of how long it’d been because of how your days began to blend. Since your attempt, Eren spent more time downstairs, sometimes taking his entire day off to stay with you, slowly making you more dependent on his presence because it was all you had. 

Akin to every other day, it started with his journey down, breakfast in hand and laptop under his arm, the device fully charged and ready for another day of playing offline games and watching videos or movies. But, also like every other day, his plans, per usual, were halted when he reached the bottom of the steps and saw you curled up on the bed, crying into your palms. 

His guilt overflowed whenever he saw you like that, but he pushed it away when he remembered all the things that could’ve happened if he hadn’t brought you here. All of the people that could have gotten to you, the things they could have done to you. It made him irrationally angry just thinking about it. In his house, you were safe, and he always knew where you were. To him, that was worth the pain it brought you.

Laying everything on the desk, he rushed to sit next to you, trapping you in his comforting arms and pulling you into his lap, “What’s wrong, baby?” 

He always asked that when you cried, always with the same pet names he’d use to try and ease your tears. You always replied that you didn’t want to discuss it, but he knew what the truth behind your sadness was. He knew it was because you missed everyone and you were terrified of telling him. 

“I don’t wanna talk about it right now.” You said, as usual, voice hoarse from tears that’d been pouring since you woke up. You put your head against him, soaking the white pajama t-shirt while he rubbed your back and cradled you like a child. His warmth and his pleasant autumn-like scent made it harder to focus on your problems, the comfort pulling you back to him in an instant. Sometimes it was like you were addicted, craving the constant reassurance of his presence and the distraction from your situation. 

This had become almost routine—he would come downstairs or wake up with you, find you crying, and drop everything to comfort you, just to continue whatever he had planned for the day after as if nothing happened. It was such an exhausting pattern for you, but he couldn't care less. All he cared for was being able to have you with him where you were safe. Being able to hold and touch you was just a bonus.

He held you as tight as he could, trying to make you feel secure while compressed in his arms. You could only snuggle into him, pushing your ear against his chest to listen to his racing heart. It was a calming and familiar white noise that helped distract you from the fact that you were probably never going to get out. It helped you feel sane and reminded you that Eren was another human too.

He sighed feeling you ease into him, finally safe enough to relax too. The room was quiet other than the gentle sounds of breathing and the mechanical ticking of the clock. It was almost peaceful like this, just the two of you cuddled up together. Listening to each other’s soft sounds and finding comfort in them.

“Can I have breakfast now?” You asked, your voice still crackling from your dry throat. You were sniffling and your face was still wet from past tears, but you were more hungry than upset now and didn’t want to wait for food anymore.

Eren smiled and slid you off his lap, making sure to plant a loving kiss on your forehead before he got up to grab the wooden breakfast tray from the desk. He walked back, setting it on your lap and revealing the stack of 4 heart-shaped pancakes to you that still radiated the warmth from being cooked. There was a tiny plate of butter and a cup of syrup sitting next to it, along with a ceramic mug of Eren’s favorite drink, his warm milk with honey and sugar mixed in. He always used to give it to you every time you came over, trying desperately to get you to favor it, and every time it always tasted bland. Not bad, but it didn’t fit your normal preference for drinks.

Recently though, whenever he’d give it to you with your breakfast, it was much sweeter than before. The milk and honey blended together with a pinch of dissolved sugar just tasted saccharine all of a sudden.

At first, you questioned if he spiked it, but when nothing happened after you drank it, you abandoned the idea. It felt so strange to suddenly enjoy something you’d been so indifferent about, but you didn’t want to overthink it. After all, you just wanted to enjoy the warmth from whatever he made you—to enjoy his warmth because it was all you had. 

“Well, are you going to eat?” Eren asked, questioning why you were staring at your food for so long.

Realizing that you’d spaced out while deep in thought, you muttered a quick “sorry” before grabbing the dull plastic knife on the tray to spread the butter over your pancakes.

While you were preparing your breakfast to your liking, Eren sat on the bed again, placing his arm behind you and sliding as close as he could without getting in your way, your thighs pressing together and his cheek almost touching your head.

He watched intensely as you cut into the syrup-soaked cake and stabbed into the small piece you separated, chomping down on it. As you chewed and swallowed it, he leaned his head on yours to get your attention, “Is it good? Did you like it?”

Nodding your head, you cut out another piece to shove into your mouth, “They’re really good! Did you make them from scratch?”

Eren smiled, feeling his heart melt when you gave him praise. He always ate up every little compliment you gave him, no matter how small it was. It was like a hit of dopamine every time you were even the tiniest bit nice—and he was addicted to it. Once he’d even kicked his legs and squealed into his pillow after you commented that he looked hot in a picture he posted, but that was a secret he would be taking to his grave.

“It’s my mom’s recipe… I just made them with a heart-shaped pan for the shape.” He replied, leaning into you and burying his face into the side of your neck while you continued to eat.

“I didn’t know you owned a heart-shaped pan,” You paused mid-bite, “When did that happen?”

“I got it when all of the Valentine's Day stuff was on clearance in stores… I just hid it in my room because I didn’t want anyone to see it while they were here.” He explained, his cheeks warming up at the thought of someone other than you seeing he owned such a bright pink and heart-shaped pan.

You giggled at his embarrassment and kept eating, enjoying the sweet syrup-soaked pancakes while you could. They were delicious, but especially warm compared to everything else, and you were so desperate to have that warmth that you were scarfing them down and barely savoring the taste. The sweet milk with honey came next, the most familiar part of the meal. You chugged it down so fast that you could feel its heat travel down to your stomach, officially ending your breakfast that morning.

It almost made you sad whenever you finished your food. You always felt extra cold after, especially without Eren there. It was never fun to experience.

“All done?” Eren asked, not allowing you a response before taking the tray from you. He placed it on the nightstand at the foot of the bed and went back to you, pushing you onto your back and crawling on top of you without warning. 

After taking a moment to maneuver himself around and get more comfortable, he placed his head on your shoulder and embraced you, the weight of his body crushing you into the mattress. It hurt a little and almost restricted your breathing, but having what was similar to a heated and weighted blanket on top of you was nice. 

He always did this when you finished your breakfast. It was one of his favorite things to do too. He loved being close to you, breathing in your scent and littering tiny kisses all over your neck and collarbone. It felt wonderful to claim you like that.

As you cocooned him with your limbs, he wriggled his way down until his head met your chest, putting his face between your breasts and squeezing you so they squished against his face. You let a gasp slip, face growing hot as a large smile formed on his lips. 

You tried to push against him to get him off, but you struggled immensely from his weight compared to your strength. It took almost all your energy to get him to budge, but he finally got the hint and sat up after minutes of your whining and squirming—only to grab your chest and squeeze as soon as his hands were free. 

You flinched and simultaneously gasped at the sudden grope, yelling at him with fake anger while batting his arms, “You’re such a fucking perv!” 

He chuckled and put his hand on the bed to lean down, his reddened cheeks so close to yours that you could feel his breath against your face, “Yeah, sure. But you love me, don’t you?”

You were silent while you considered what to say, afraid to lie to him but knowing that if you gave him any answer other than yes, he’d probably lose it on you. You did love him. You really did, but not in the way he wanted you to. You didn’t think you did, at least. He was just a safe space for you. A source of comfort while you were trapped. That didn’t mean you loved him, did it?

Growing insecure at your lack of response, Eren squeezed your arm just tight enough to regain your attention and asked you again, this time with more desperation lingering,  “Don’t you, angel?”

Without thinking it over more, you gave him an unconvincing answer, “Yes. I do.”

Satisfied with your response, he gave you a quick peck on the lips and got up to grab his laptop from the desk. You watched him carefully the whole time, sitting up and eyeing him as he picked up the small computer and carried it back to you. 

He placed carefully it in your lap, plopping down and leaning into you like he did during breakfast, his arm slung around your waist. You stared at the sticker-covered computer in your lap, your hands trembling while you considered asking him about going back upstairs again instead of spending another day in bed binging a random show you chose. 

You’d asked previously, even begged him to give you another chance, but his answer was always the same. He’d tell you that he isn’t ready for that, or that he doesn’t trust you yet. If you tried to ask repeatedly or beg for it, he would get angry with you and even lash out, leaving you alone for the entire day as a punishment, no matter how loud your cries got or how much it stung him to hear them. 

“Can I ask something before we start, Eren?” You managed to get out, your words shaking as you spoke.

You could feel him tense up next to you as you asked, his gaze now fixated on the laptop instead of you.

“What is it?” He asked, already knowing the answer. 

You opened your mouth to talk but stuttered so much trying to get the first word out that you had to pause again before talking.

“Can I go upstairs for the day?” You pleaded, quickly adding onto it so he couldn’t instantly deny you, “I’ll do anything you want! Please! I just… want to leave the basement for a while.”

Silence followed.

You were shaking, terrified of what he was thinking. He was staring at the floor, his brows furrowed as he ran through all of his options. He wasn’t angry, not yet at least. He only would be if you pushed for it too much, but he still hated having to answer that question. Why couldn’t you just be happy with what he gave you? He understood that you were bored and lonely, but it was still frustrating. It was so, so frustrating.

“I don’t know if I can trust you yet,” was all he could manage in response, because If he said any more or got too aggressive there would be tears. And he was so weak to your tears. It was the sole reason he always had to leave you when you cried to be let out. If he stayed, his already weak spirit might break, and then you could weave your way into having your way and escaping. He didn’t want to risk anything close to that.

Despite his effort to avoid it, tears began to prickle in the corner of your eyes, almost as if on command. You wanted to leave so badly that you were partially willing to give up your hope of escape if it meant you could at least have that. You would give all of it, just to have that ounce of freedom and self-autonomy back. 

“I don’t want to leave anymore, Eren! I promise! Chain my ankles or handcuff me to you, whatever!  Please, just let me go upstairs with you!” You begged. It was evident you were pushing his limit with the look that took over his face, but you didn’t know what else you could do to convince him.

Eren shut his eyes, the frown on his face deepening, “Baby, please. Don’t do this today.”

“Please, Eren. Please.” You begged again, the first fearful tear spilling over your cheek. The look you gave him was painful, his chest tightening the longer he stared at you. You’d done this almost every day for the last week and it was so aggravating. He hated being separated from you but you forced it on him by pleading so often.

He looked away from you and leaned forward, his elbows on his knees and his face in his hands as he snapped at you, “Why? Why do you want to so badly?! Can’t you just be happy with what I give you?” 

He finished with a sigh and waited quietly for your response, but nothing came. You were silent. 

It took Eren several moments to realize that you weren’t going to talk back, so when he finally lifted his head and looked at you, the sight ripped his heart in two.

You had your eyes squeezed shut and your mouth covered as you sobbed into it, trying to hide the sounds so you wouldn’t irritate him more, but seeing you cry like that with such obvious fear diminished any anger he had. He hated being the cause of your tears. He hated it.

Pulling you into his arms again and pushing the laptop aside, he apologized profusely and held you tighter. You whimpered into him, gripping his shirt while he pushed your face against his chest. 

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry… I’m sorry for snapping, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.” He had his hand on your head, digging his fingers into your hair while he repeated his apology, “Please stop crying. Please, you know I hate hearing you cry.”

You hiccuped, holding your breath to choke down your tears. You held it in for a few more moments until you couldn’t anymore, taking an involuntary breath and sobbing into his shirt. In a poor attempt to silence it, you covered your mouth while you cried, quietly begging him not to leave you between sobs. It broke his heart. 

He tried to reassure you, hugging you tightly and petting your head while he cooed, “I won’t leave. I won’t leave this time.”

It took a while, but following a few violent hiccups, silenced sobs, and deep, difficult inhales, your tears were dissipating and you were calming down, clinging to Eren as if your life depended on it. 

He held you close, basking in your touch. He knew why you wanted to leave the basement. He was stupid to think that being trapped there would be enough for you, but after the last time he let you up, he was terrified that you’d try to leave again. If you ever did manage to get away from him, it would mean he’d lose everything, and he didn’t even want to think about that happening. 

You needed to stay with him, where you were safe. Where he could watch over you. But, it was clear you also needed at least a little freedom, otherwise, your mental state could deteriorate even more than it already had, and that would be just as bad as losing you through escape. He didn’t want to reduce you to a shell of your former self. He didn’t want to break you. He just wanted to keep you to himself.

Thinking it over some more while you were wiping your face on his shirt, Eren decided to go against his better judgment and give in to what you wanted, which was exactly what he had been trying to avoid. It was easier that way, considering you were both feeling awful about your situation.

“I’ll—I’ll take you upstairs. I’ll take you upstairs today.” He blurted out, sounding reluctant to say it out loud.

Your entire mood had changed from just that sentence, perking your head up so you could meet his eyes from where you sat on his lap. Eyes wide with excitement, they were lighting up more than they had in the month you’d been stuck there. It was nice for him to see. He’d missed that sparkle so much. 

“I’ll only let you come up if you follow my rules though, okay? If you break them I’m sending you back down and I won’t even think about letting you up for at least a year.” He aggressively added to his previous statement, wanting to be clear with what he expected of you so there wouldn’t be any complaints later.

You rapidly nodded your head, getting ready to agree to whatever he asked if it meant getting that slight sliver of freedom in the end. Lucky for you, he didn’t want to take advantage of your eagerness—not too much at least. He loved you too much to hurt you like that.

With a small sigh, Eren slid you off of his lap and took his laptop, holding out his hand for you after he got up. You took it with a large smile plastered on your face, pulling yourself onto your feet and practically skipping to the stairs because of how happy you were. He was slow to follow after you, not particularly joyful about letting you out of the safe haven he’d created for you, but still willing to if it meant he got to see your bright smile again.

Once he made it to the top, he was hesitant to unlock the door. He really didn’t want to let you out, but when he looked over and saw how excited you looked standing next to him, he couldn’t help but picture how upset you were just prior, and how quickly that changed when he said you could go upstairs. Keeping you locked up and to himself was already selfish enough, he didn’t want to keep suffering even more in a cold basement for his own benefit.

Before he went through the final step of opening the door, he grabbed your hand and squeezed it tight. He was trying to make sure you couldn’t just run off, but also trying to reassure himself that he was doing the right thing. With a final heavy sigh, he unlocked the door and turned the knob with his laptop under his arm, pushing it open and revealing the dim light of morning to you.

You tried to run, not with a hope to escape but more so out of excitement—but Eren was quick to pull you back to him and remind you of your place.

“Don’t forget what I told you.” He spoke sternly, the grip on your hand growing tighter to the point that it hurt. 

His rules—to behave. To do what he asked. From the first time he let you upstairs. The same rules that you broke the last time you were here, and not just because he was vague about what “behaving” meant. Of course, you couldn’t forget.

You sounded dejected as you looked at the creaky wooden floor, “I’m just… excited. Sorry.” 

Sighing, he sauntered forward while pushing you with him, taking the lead but ultimately doing what you wanted by going to the living room. 

Jiyuu got visibly excited when you walked into his view, his fluffy wings opening up slightly while he paced back and forth on the giant bird tree across the room, considering if it was worth it to fly over. 

Eren stopped in his tracks, a small smile brightening his face when he realized what the bird wanted. He always thought it was sweet that he liked you, despite parrots' common behavior of being possessive over their owner. It also made your integration into his home a lot easier, so he wouldn’t have to worry about the bird going after you whenever he was affectionate with you.

“Why don’t you go pick him up?” He asked, trying to push you forward, closer to Jiyuu. 

Excited to see the bird—a living creature other than Eren—but terrified of doing something wrong and being punished for it, you turned to look at him, asking for reassurance that this wasn’t a trap, “Are you sure?”

“Yes. I’m sure. I won’t be mad at you for walking away from me this time.” He assured you, the hand on your back pushing you even further, harsher this time to the point you almost stumbled.

You stepped forward with hesitance, slowly gaining confidence the closer you got to Jiyuu, your saving grace from complete isolation with Eren. Watching carefully, Eren stayed behind, his gaze burning holes into the back of your head. It made you so nervous, his eyes fixated on your every move. Being watched so closely was highly unpleasant and anxiety-inducing, and you could tell that Jiyuu didn’t like it either.

Climbing onto you when you held your arm out, Jiyuu was quick to run to your shoulder and puff his feathers up, squawking loudly at Eren. He’d never been especially protective of you, nor aggressive towards Eren, so this behavior was completely new—at least to you. It was especially shocking because of how loud he was able to scream, the sound triggering a constant ringing in your ears. 

“Eren? What’s wrong with him?” You panicked, turning to see what the bird was so upset about that he had to shriek, only to be face-to-face with Eren. His knees bent slightly so he met your height, startling you even more when you unexpectedly met his piercing green pupils.

His eyes were glued to the bird, his hand lifted in front of him so he would step up from your shoulder. To your surprise, the bird nipped at his hand and chewed on it, stepping on it when he was finished and acting like he hadn’t just screamed at him. “He’s just being moody. Don’t mind it too much, he just gets like this sometimes, ‘specially when I’m not in the best mood. He can tell.”

As he put Jiyuu back on the tree stand to chew on more of his toys, he walked closer and wrapped his arm around you, practically forcing you into his chest with his laptop pressed against your back. When his other hand was free from the bird’s talons, it joined his other to squeeze you tightly, keeping you close as he leaned over you, inhaling the comforting scent from your skin and hair.

You returned the hug, trying to distract yourself from the sinking feeling you had in your chest when he implied that he wasn’t in a good mood. It was obvious it was because of you—because you wanted to go upstairs. It made you feel so guilty, but also so afraid. He could be unpredictable when he was upset, which is probably why Jiyuu didn’t like it either.

“Why don’t we just watch some TV for now? Since he’s in such a bad mood and I still want to laze around…” He spoke up, backing away but leaving little space between you and him.

Without a thought, you nodded, ready to agree to almost anything as long as it would improve his mood and keep you out of your personal hell known as the basement. With your compliance, he was quick to drag you back onto the couch, setting the laptop down on the coffee table and pouncing, crushing you under his weight. Your whines went ignored by him in favor of grabbing the remote to activate the TV, bringing up the news before he swiftly changed it to an on-demand streaming service. He put on one of your favorite shows—one you’d already watched, probably dozens of times since you’d come here—and threw the controller

down, burying his face into your chest and engulfing you in his arms.

Resting your hands on his back when you finally processed everything he’d sped through in seconds, you focused more on him than the TV, although only able to see the top of his head and his messy bun. His face was buried between your boobs again, except this time, instead of smiling and teasing you about it, he shut his eyes and eased into you, feeling secure enough to relax with you trapped underneath him. The shift in mood was apparent, but all you could think to do was run your hands through his hair, hoping that would soothe him enough to think about letting you stay upstairs more often. 

It was silent after that, besides the background noise of the TV playing and Jiyuu preening his feathers and chewing wood. You were both clinging to each other, unmoving and resting. Eren was so warm, it almost made you tired—but you didn’t want to sleep. Not when you were finally experiencing what you’d wanted so badly for weeks. You longed to walk around and explore the house more, but he probably wouldn’t let you. It was frustrating.

“Eren?” You said, trying to get his attention on you instead of whatever he was thinking about in the silence.

He hummed in reply, not bothering to lift his head because he was too comfortable with his face against your chest. 

You twirled some of his loose hair between your fingers, silently trying to persuade him as you asked, “Can we go to your room? I want to see more than just your living room and kitchen.” 

Before you could continue with your long-winded speech trying to convince him to let you go to a different part of the house, he interrupted you with a finger over your lips, letting out a muffled “mm-mm” while he shook his head that was still against your chest. You frowned, moving his finger away from your mouth and continuing to push, “Why not?”

A scowl took over his face as he peered up at you, his chin stabbing into your sternum when he replied with aggressive venom in his tone, “Because I said no. Drop it.”

Once you nodded, a look of stinging fear glazing your eyes, his expression relaxed and he put his face back into your chest. Although your response calmed him, his answer did nothing to satiate your curiosity. You’d been in his room a few times prior to the kidnapping, so what was so different about now?

You let out a small sigh, continuing to run your hands through his hair but turning your attention towards the TV that still played your favorite show, although you’d begun to get rather tired of it after watching it over and over so much. Especially now, when watching different shows and dramas was all Eren had let you do aside from occasionally letting you play games on his laptop. As relaxing as the routine used to be, it was starting to grow excruciatingly dull. There were only so many days you could do nothing but laze around before you grew tired of it.

“Eren.” You began again, desperate for something to entertain you. You didn’t want to spend all your time out of the basement doing the same thing you did in it.

With a quiet groan, he lifted his head again and frowned, “What now?”

“I’m bored… I want to do something other than watch TV.”

Realizing that you weren’t trying to annoy him about getting into his room again, his eyes softened and he replied with a sweeter tone, “Like what?”

“I don’t know. You have games, don’t you?”

“In my room, yeah. But I don’t want you going in there right now and I’m not leaving you alone to grab anything.”

“Then what else can we do?”

When you asked, his brows scrunched together and he averted your gaze, deep in thought. You watched carefully, worried that he would become irate if you were too talkative while he was trying to relax. 

Slowly, his cheeks darkened as an idea popped into his head—one he’d usually tried to push away so that he wouldn’t risk making you feel uncomfortable with your already fragile emotional state, but right now? You seemed to be in a better mood, and much more content with doing just about anything to ease your boredom. There was nothing to stand in the way of his selfish desires.

Noticing the way his former annoyance bloomed into a red-faced fluster, you grew worried and tried to turn his head so he’d look at you, only for him to avoid meeting your eyes. His cheeks were burning hot to the touch and you could tell he had something on his mind.

“What’s wrong?” You tried to ask calmly despite the tremble in your voice, mentally preparing yourself for whatever emotion he might reply with.

A silent pause followed, and he barely managed to stutter it out, his hesitancy to explain his thoughts holding the words back, “I thought of something we could do if you are really that against just watching TV, but—but it’s kind of lewd. It’s—It’s really lewd actually.”

You could feel your cheeks grow warm at all the things that could mean, quietly urging him to continue out of curiosity about his desire, “Yes…? What is it?”

He was quiet again before he met your eyes, replying with a faltering voice full of anxiety, “I was thinking that maybe… we could take turns touching each other, and we could—I could learn more about your body… and we could make it into a game, I guess? If you really want to, the person who finds the most sensitive spots on the other person could win. That would make it more fun, right? Would something like that interest you more than TV?”

He stared at you with pleading puppy eyes while awaiting your response, his pupils swallowing his irises that practically glowed as they peered into your soul. 

Your entire face burned hot, now matching his. You were like shy kids confessing to each other, so tense and unnerved. 

Speaking with an unfamiliar kind of softness in his voice, he sounded like he would explode with embarrassment if you didn’t respond well, “We don’t have to, but I just—I just really want to touch you again. Even without the ‘game’ part. I’ve missed it. A lot.” 

He felt so perverted just saying it out loud.

His offer was tempting, but you didn’t know if you could trust it. Your judgment had felt so clouded recently and you’d been giving into him more under the guise of gaining enough freedom to escape, but how much would you need before you tried to leave again? The thought of escaping was crossing your mind less and less, and you were growing used to being with only Eren all the time, getting dangerously close to enjoying it. 

Part of you was terrified of ever leaving, terrified of how your friends would react when they found out what you’d already let him do to you, and terrified of leaving what you’d just started becoming accustomed to—but another part of you was terrified to stay. If you did, how far would things go? How deep of a hole would you dig for yourself before it was too late to get out?

“We don’t have to!” He repeated, pulling you out of your thoughts, “I could just find something else for us to do if you don’t want to,”

“It’s okay! It’s fine, it’s fine. We can do that.” You blurted out without processing what you were saying. The last thing you wanted was to upset him, so satisfying him was the only option even if it went against your better judgment. You could deal with the guilt later, but right now you had to focus on keeping his trust. Besides, it wouldn’t hurt to give in and have a little fun with someone you’d trusted while you could, take advantage and get the experience you missed out on years before. You’d rather it be him than a stranger. That’s what you told yourself, at least.

“Really? Are you sure?” He asked again to reassure your consent while his lips shifted into a sly smile.

No. You weren’t. But you’d already made your bed, and you’d rather lie in it than rip off the sheets and start from the beginning, “Yeah. I am.”

There was a small moment of silence, the two of you staring at each other before he jumped off of the couch, swiftly making his way to the tree where Jiyuu was. He was quick to take his feathery friend to his cage, closing the door and covering it with the blanket he’d normally only use for him at night. Despite the bird's clear displeasure of being put to bed early, showcased through his sad-sounding caws as the cage was locked, he left the cover on and returned to you on the couch, towering over you with half-lidded eyes and a beet-red face.

“Uh, could you get on my lap when I sit down?” He asked timidly, placing a hand on your shoulder. 

You responded by nodding and sliding to the side, allowing him to sit while he dragged you onto his lap to straddle him.

Once again, it grew quiet. You were looking at anything but each other, the awkward tension making it difficult to keep eye contact. You were both used to intimate actions, but not intimate words, so anything you thought of saying fell short before it could leave your lips. 

It felt like you were fumbling teenagers again, lacking experience and not knowing where to begin—although Eren was the only one of you who had any to begin with. The most you had under your belt was some awkward and sloppy kissing between you and your short-term ex-boyfriends from high school, but he didn’t know that.

“Since this is a game… Do I get anything if I win?” You asked first, trying to break the ice and guarantee at least something good would come out of this.

You watched the cogs turn in Eren’s head for a moment before he responded, trying to figure out how to word it so that you didn’t request anything unreasonable after his answer, “I guess you can have something… Just tell me what, as long as it doesn’t have anything to do with leaving.”

It only took you a minute to decide what you wanted, the idea popping into your head rather quickly when you thought about what he would actually be willing to give, “Can I go in your room?”

He sighed hearing your response, a cross glare in his eyes while he reluctantly acceded, “Fine, but only if you A, win, and B, give me until tomorrow to clean it.”

The excitement you had grew rapidly, but just as it peaked, it dissipated when you remembered what you would have to do to get your reward, and the fact that it wasn’t guaranteed in the first place. The small smile that’d grown on your face faded once you realized it, and then the pressure ramped up once again.

“So…” He finally began, a short pause holding him while his eyes drifted down to your chest, his hands landing on your hips where he rubbed small circles into them with his thumbs, “Where should we start?”

You were both anxious, but he was the only one trying to hide it. His hands were shaking, but he tried to mask it with subtle movements down your plush thighs. He wanted to touch you. He wanted to feel all of you and run his hands over your entire body—but he wanted to make sure you wanted it too. He needed you to want it too.

“Wherever you want,” you replied, too nervous to say much else. His hands felt like fire against your cold skin, the feeling of them gliding over your body making your cheeks boil. 

His fingers grazed down to your knees and back up your body, stopping just below your chest to speak quietly, “I want to touch you everywhere though.” 

It was obvious what he wanted to do, but was too nervous to do it. His brows scrunched together while he stared at your chest, sunken in thought. The sight almost had you giggling from how silly he looked like that, so deeply focused on your breasts. To try and urge him forward and get past both of your anxieties, you slowly intertwined your fingers with his, leading his hands up to grope you.

His eyes flicked up to you as he made contact with your chest again, his gaze relaxing and eyes lighting up as they stared into yours. You looked so pretty in your current position, sitting on his lap with your cute thighs squished against him, your hands covering his, and your gorgeous eyes shying away from his stare. 

“Can I kiss you? Please?” He asked, leaning in so close that you could feel the heat radiating off of his crimson face while he squeezed you.

Letting out a small squeak from his grip, you decided to skip the verbal reply and gently pushed your lips against his, your noses bumping awkwardly because you were hesitant to do anything that could deepen the kiss further. Despite this, Eren missed the cue and tilted his head to the side, trying desperately to interlock your lips and part yours.

His groping grew rougher as he relaxed, fingers touching your nipples through the thin shirt you wore, the fabric barely shielding how hard they were growing. Your face was burning while he felt you up, sweat beading on your forehead when something stiff pressed against your crotch. 

It was so warm. Everything about him was warm. His body, his demeanor, even his smell. It was all so warm compared to the cold you always felt. Even before he took you away, it was always cold. But he was so warm.

“Eren…” you mumbled into his lips, your pulse rising and your arms falling over his shoulders.

He pulled away for a moment, face still inches away from yours, “What is it?”

“You’re warm.”

You could feel him chuckle as you said it, responding with “So are you.”

He kissed you again, this time carefully pushing his tongue between your lips in a way that was less than forceful and moving one of his hands to the back of your neck to hold you there. His touch sent tingles up your spine, your body melting into his hands. It was like your integrity burned away when he was close, and you couldn’t help but crave more.

Eren’s other palm slipped under your shirt, sliding up your stomach and squeezing your bare breast before lifting the fabric further. Your body tensed again, suddenly growing anxious at the thought of him seeing your chest nude. It’s not like he hadn’t before, but it was only now that it felt so nerve-wracking. You couldn’t pinpoint why, but now the thought made your heart race.

When he finally pulled his face away from yours, giving you time to breathe, it was only so he could pull your shirt over your head and throw it aside. Following that, his mouth was back on yours and he was reaching for your chest again—but this time, you stopped him. You took your arms off his neck to cover yourself, anxiety pulsing at the thought of him looking at you more. You didn’t feel this way the other times you’d been nude around him, so why were you so nervous now? Everything was burning all of a sudden, and it almost made you feel sick.

“Hey, is something wrong?” Eren questioned in his sweetest voice, attempting to quell your sudden fear by backing off to cup your cheek, his other hand resting on your thigh. You tried to look him in the eyes, but your stomach sank when you met them. His irises were the brightest, most intimidating green that made your heart ache, you couldn’t stand to stare. 

“I’m—I’m kind of scared.” You stammered, staring down at his hand while his thumb rubbed small circles into your skin.

His brows furrowed as he overthought what you said, “Just… all of a sudden? It wasn’t like this before, why now?” 

He didn’t mean to seem angry, but his expression showed the opposite. So, feeling pressured with a slight tinge of fear in your eyes, you quietly apologized and began to uncover yourself, afraid of upsetting him and causing any harm that might get you sent back downstairs. He stopped you immediately, grabbing your wrists and holding them so your arms still covered you. 

“Don’t apologize… It’s fine if you don’t want to.” He reassured, reaching to grab your shirt beside him on the couch, “I don’t want to do anything if you don’t want to.”

Sadness laced his tone, his expression matching it as he pulled the garment over your head. It wasn’t because you were hesitant to go further with him, you knew that, but your heart hurt to see him making such a face. So sad, even with the tiny smile on his lips that was meant to reassure you. It was more than just wanting to stay upstairs. You wanted to make him feel happy. Even if you felt guilty about how you would do it.

“No, no, Eren…” You stopped him from pulling the shirt down, pushing it back over your chest while you wiped your watering eyes with your other arm. “It’s—It’s not that. I'm just—I’m—So nervous.” 

“What are you nervous about?” He asked, trying to avoid the temptation of looking at your now bare torso while he addressed the issue at hand. 

“I don’t know,” you started, mentally going through the list of things that were making you anxious to find something to say other than the truth about the shame you felt, “This is just… a lot different than the last few times you’ve seen me naked. You’re so close so you’re going to see… everything.”

“I don’t care what they look like. The only thing I care about is that it’s you.” He grabbed your hands and squeezed them, cheeks blazing red as he leaned close to you to confess, “You’re perfect to me. So perfect.”

Your heart began to swell again, this time for a different reason. 

He always made you feel so wanted, even before he took you away, his words like a warm blanket around your needy heart. It almost had you crawling into his hold, with no intention of ever leaving. No one ever praised you like he did, so maybe that’s why it had such a large effect on you. You were so susceptible to it that it was dangerous to your escape, constantly tiptoeing the line between enjoying the praise and falling face-first into Stockholm syndrome. It was a dangerous game you were playing, and without even realizing, you were losing. 

“Can… you touch me again?” You asked quietly after letting his praise marinate in your head for a minute, prying your hands out of his to pull your shirt over your breasts again. 

Shocked by your sudden switch-up, his eyes widened for a moment before he awkwardly nodded while placing his hands on your waist, finally letting his eyes trail down to your breasts.

Seeing them so close sent blood rushing not only to his face, but also down under, his already semi-hard on pushing uncomfortably against his pants. He wanted to brand them with his bites and kisses, cover them in his spit, and bruise them with hickeys to claim them as his. He was opposed to rushing you though, so all he could do was drag his hands up your torso until they finally cupped around your soft flesh, squeezing lightly just to confirm that he was really touching you and that it wasn’t just another wet dream.

You squeezed your eyes shut, trying to repeat his reassurances in your head while he fondled you. His normally cold hands were warm against your skin, squishing and playing with your chest and making your already hot body feel like it was burning. 

He was pushing them together, bouncing them, and holding them in his palms. It was so embarrassing, but you were trying desperately to keep it together. When you finally brewed up enough confidence to pry your eyes open, you saw how happy he looked, as silly as it was, and it took everything inside of you not to let out a giggle that could’ve embarrassed him. You wanted him to keep enjoying himself, even if your face burned from the awkwardness of it.

But just as you were growing used his hands on you, he threw a question at you that hit like a brick to the face, draining every ounce of courage out of you in a split second, “Can I… suck on them?”

He was leaning towards your chest as he spoke, looking up at you with anticipating eyes that made another wave of intense heat flare through your face. You were barely getting used to his fondling, but to suck on them? You might faint. With no experience except your own fingers and numerous toys, you didn’t even know how sensitive your nipples could be. The thought of squirming around in his lap while he lapped so leisurely on your tits made you shiver. But at the same time, it also piqued your curiosity and made the warmth between your thighs grow. You couldn’t help but wonder what it would feel like.

“Yeah. Sure. That’s—That’s fine. Just—be gentle, ok? No one’s ever done that to me before…” You replied with a shaking voice, brows pushed together with worry while you avoided eye contact.

“Why wouldn’t I be?” He asked rhetorically, hungry eyes still gazing up at you as he leaned towards your chest. He broke his stare to pull your shirt up and off again, cupping your breasts and latching onto one of your nipples like it was all he was born to do. 

You winced in response, anxious to experience the feeling for the first time. Just having your sensitive bud in his mouth felt so different, so warm and wet—so when he took a long, slow lick, you couldn’t stop the whimper that left your throat. 

He almost lost his composure right then when he heard that noise. It was amazing, like a slice of a heavenly melody he wanted to keep locked in his brain forever. He wanted more of those sounds. He needed more of them.

With your other breast cupped in his palm, he started to pinch and nudge the bud while he sucked softly on the one in his mouth. You were already letting out more quiet whines, holding the back of his head while your fingers tangled in his hair. You couldn’t even begin to explain the burning pleasure that rippled from your chest to your core or the throbbing ache that proliferated between your thighs. It felt so much better than you imagined, and as much as you didn’t want to admit it, Eren being the one to do it made your heart race. 

Desperate to pry more sounds from you, his intensity rose by the minute, lips tugging on your nipple and fingers pinching the other. As more soft whines and moans spilled from your mouth, your spine arching to push your chest further into his face, he could feel the stiffness in his pants painfully begging to be freed. You sounded beautiful, he just wanted to throw you onto the couch and fuck you senseless while you cried out. Holding back from that was so hard, especially with all the cute noises you were making. He wanted to take you right here, but he knew he’d have to be patient if he didn’t want you to feel rushed or forced. He needed to be like a wolf stalking its deer. Slow, calculated, determined.

Pulling away from your mound, he looked at your swollen, spit-covered bud, smiling to himself with newfound confidence while moving to your other one. His possessive feelings were growing with each mark he left on you, every new blemish claiming another piece of your body for himself. Once he had all of you, god knows how he’d act.

He had one arm around you, pushing you closer to him to make it easier for him to swallow your chest while his hands groped your ass and felt up the wet spot between your legs, just barely tugging at the hem of your shorts when the opportunity arose. He was sucking hard, running his tongue diligently over the nipple and flicking it repeatedly to steal more moans from you. Every noise, every whimper, and every whine was just more motivation to him, fueling his excitement to keep touching you and eventually have you touch him. He almost couldn’t take it anymore, the bulge in his pants becoming increasingly painful the longer this went on.

It seemed he finally snapped after a few more minutes of vigorous sucking and quiet whimpers, grabbing your arms and forcing his face away from your chest after he heard you whisper out his name. As much as he wanted to continue the petting, he needed to have you now or he might just burst. 

“Fuck whatever stupid idea I had for a game, I need you to touch me. I need you to touch me now, please.” Eren begged, sounding more desperate than you’d ever heard him before, almost growing teary-eyed at how pent-up he was becoming. His hips were roughly grinding into yours, praying for anything to rub against or release his tension. He was so frantic that you thought he might get on his knees and beg if you said no.

If you were being honest with yourself, you were curious. You wanted to know what he felt like and how he would react. You wanted to revel in the feeling of being desired so badly.

“You want me to touch you… that bad?” You asked, your voice quivering from the intense feeling rumbling through your body that you could only describe as heavy. Without Eren’s support, you would probably collapse into a hot mess on the couch.

Eren’s eyes grew wide as if you were spouting nonsense in a language he didn’t understand, “Of course I do! Why the hell do you think we’re here in the first place? I’ve never wanted anything so badly!”

His hands were shaking out of frustration, his grip strong enough to leave marks. Though, when the fear gleamed in your eyes and your muscles tensed up, he was quick to calm, loosening his hold and sliding his hands down to hold yours instead.

“I’m… I’m sorry, I’m just… so, so desperate. I want you so badly,” He apologized, looking down to avoid shameful eye contact with you, “I need you. Badly.”

You stared at him quietly for a moment, playing around with the ideas in your head before deciding through your lust-clouded judgment that you wanted him too. In the moment, you didn’t care if you would regret it later. You just wanted to touch him. You wanted to have control over him, if only for a little while.

For once, you were the one to make the first move, leaning forward and placing a soft kiss on his forehead while you reached your hand to his groin. His entire body stiffened as you put your hand on the tent in his pants, his cheeks flushing when he peeked up at you with that desperate look in his eyes.

“Please—Please be gentle. Don’t squeeze it too much, I don’t—know how much I can take…” He stuttered out as if the fabric holding his cock back hurt any less than you squeezing him too tightly would.

Nodding, you caressed him again, watching carefully as his eyes squeezed shut and he leaned back, uttering a soft moan from your hand on the underside of his cock. He was still tense, but you could see that he was enjoying your touch, so you carried on. Beginning gently, you cupped him through the thin fabric of his pajama pants and massaged your hand up and down his pulsing shaft, eventually moving to tug at the band around his waist to silently ask permission to free him from his confines. 

Although you wanted to take it slow, you were also desperate to see and touch him without the barrier separating you; and it seemed like he was too. That much was evident when he didn’t bother to let you pull his pants or boxers down, ripping them off himself and leading your hand back to his freed shaft by your wrist.

Catching on quickly, you tightened your hand around him and eyed up his length, examining it while he went back to gasping at every little movement you made. He was a lot bigger than you expected him to be up close, not to mention how heavy he felt in your palm. Seeing all of the little things you hadn’t noticed previously, it looked so different too. 

Veins crawled up from the bottom of his girth, stopping a few inches before reaching his head, and he was swollen and red at the tip, already leaking precum. His bush was well-trimmed, a tiny freckle at the base of it, and it curved upwards while it twitched in your hand. You never thought you’d see a dick that looked so… perfect. Just holding his weight in your hands had you clenching around nothing, the thought of it filling you up passing through your mind more than once.

You slowly moved your hand up, stopping with your thumb on the underside of where his head and shaft met. You’d read online about men being sensitive in that spot, and it appeared to be true by the way his breath hitched when you ghosted your digit over it. Curious, you pressed lightly and caressed the spot up and down, causing his hips to jolt unexpectedly while a louder gasp left his throat. 

“Ohh my god. Oh my god.” He breathed out, pushing his elbows into the cushions behind him to grip the couch beneath his thighs more efficiently. He’d never felt this good, even with his other, more experienced flings in the past. Even with less skill and precision, you were just so much better.

You were you. His dream. Everything he’d ever wanted in life. That’s what you were. His most prized possession, his most important person. That alone made everything feel superior. Because it was you doing it.

Enjoying the erotic look on his face, you kept up your motions and continued to stroke the spot below his head, sending him into a frenzy of squirms and whimpers as he grew overstimulated just by the pad of your thumb. His hips bucked up, desperate to get more friction to tip him over the edge of his already approaching orgasm.

“Fuck—Fuck, you have no idea how good this feels.” He uttered under his breath, voice shaking as you rubbed even faster. His whimpers were high-pitched, turning into something more akin to whines as he neared the end; but just as he was reaching the hilt of his pleasure, you pulled your hand away, leaving him to cry and plead for your touch again. 

Seeing him so desperate for it was such a change from his usual self. It was like the roles swapped, and now you were the one that had him wrapped around your finger. You never wanted it to end. You longed to keep what little control over him you had for as long as you could. Plus, he looked cute when he was the one tomato-faced and begging.

Leaning close, you kissed his jaw while he audibly sniffled, reaching up to put your hand behind his head and push it forward to kiss his forming tears away. He whimpered again, one hand clawing the couch while the other flew to your hip. You pecked his face, slowly trailing to his lips so you could kiss, fully entrapping him in the scheme forming in your head. 

Your fingers wrapped around his shaft for a second time, shocking him into pulling away before you pushed your lips against his again, assertive about keeping his mouth against yours. He was already moaning into you, grip growing tight as you began moving your hand up and down his length.

He was practically melting underneath you, arms trembling as your hand worked his hardness, pumping it rapidly. His cries for you were only growing louder, turning into muffled chants about how close he was to finishing. You loved to hear it, but you knew you didn’t want it to end so soon.

Once again, you let go of him, moving off of his lap and taking a seat next to him on your knees while he whined about your second absence. However, his complaints ceased when he realized what you were doing, your head already moving closer to his length and your hand taking its place at the base of it. 

“Wait, wait,” He panicked, trying to stop you, reaching forward to grab some of your hair and pull your head away, “Are—Are you sure you want to do that? It doesn’t taste as good as you might think.”

Your mouth changed from its open “O” into a pout, a frown taking over your features as he stopped you from finishing him off, “I know what I want, Eren. Please let me.”

With your familiar longing gaze piercing his, he was quick to give in and remove his hand from your head, thanking the lord that he held the motivation to wash himself regularly and make sure he was clean every time he interacted with you. Right now you wanted him almost as much as he wanted you, and if you were so certain about it then he wasn’t about to stop that. He needed to take his chance to savor it because god knows how long he’d wanted this and when he'd get another chance. You finally wanted him too, so it would be foolish to stop now.

“Just… don’t push yourself.” He muttered, running his hand down your back while you resumed what you were doing before.

You nodded with a quiet hum, placing a gentle kiss on the head and taking an experimental lick just below. Tracing the pad of your finger up and down his veins, you took in all of the little shudders you managed to coax out of him and began a trail of kisses down the underside of his length. The way he was almost pouting with embarrassment while his cheeks were such a deep shade of red was adorable, it just made you want more. You wondered if this was how he felt about you most of the time, so enamored that he couldn't think about anything other than your face.

Reaching the base with your pecks, his cock twitching every time you made contact, you stuck out your tongue and pressed it against him. Slowly and tediously, you dragged it back up to the top, leaving a trail of saliva in your wake while Eren bit back a whine. A few more frivolous kisses to the tip and you finally took him into your mouth, pushing your tongue against him while you lowered your head as much as you could without gagging.

Lifting your head, you peered up at him, studying his face while you tried to force more into your mouth, unable to fit more than a few inches before tears emerged in the corners of your eyes. He was so big, you could barely get anything in, but that didn’t seem to affect the amount of pleasure it gave him when you finally began bobbing your head. Eren was already turning into a mess again, but the second you started moving the hand on his shaft in rhythm with your mouth, he nearly broke down crying from the feeling. 

Tracing shaky hearts on your back, he stared down at you, trying to burn the image he saw into his memory and lock it away for safekeeping. It was exhilarating to see you like this, so much so that he had to cover his mouth to prevent the moans that slipped out from growing too loud. He couldn’t handle it, especially after being edged twice, he was going to go crazy if you didn’t let him finish this time. 

Holding himself still was the most difficult thing, especially when all he wanted to do was hammer into your throat like there was no tomorrow—but he didn’t want to make you choke on him. Not yet, at least. It felt too early to be that rough with you. 

Being built up and denied satisfaction the last two times meant it wasn't long before the band was stretched again, dangerously close to breaking. The way your tongue pressed against the sensitive spot below his head, the way your fingers curled around him and stroked everything that didn’t fit in your mouth had him gasping for air. It was driving him up the wall, pushing him so close that he could feel himself at the very edge, nearly tumbling over it even if you weren’t the best at what you were doing. 

When your eyes flicked up to meet his, watching his ruby-red and sweat-slicked face twisted with pleasure, he finally snapped. You watched his eyes squeeze shut as he threw his head back, crying out in whimpers as he lost control of his hips through his orgasm, repeatedly chanting “I love you” between swears.

You couldn’t help but gag as more than you could handle was shoved down your throat, eyes going wide as your mouth was coated with a bitter taste that made you wince. You had to pull away while he was still coming, coughing and gagging more at the feeling of his release in your throat while the rest spilled over your hand.

Eren was apologizing under his breath, still struggling through the pleasure of his climax—but you decided to push him the slightest bit further as revenge for making you choke, massaging your finger over the same spot you had earlier and sending a shock through his entire body again. You continued to touch him as you sat up, leaning into him with your head on his shoulder so you could feel the way he shook from the overstimulation. 

“Please—Please, oh my god I can’t take it.” He cried, tears bordering his eyes as you teased him. Seeing that you didn’t want to go too overboard, you decided to give him mercy and let go, watching him go limp as his body finally relaxed. He was panting, covered in sweat like he’d just finished one of the intense basketball scrimmages you used to watch him do, even though he’d only gotten sucked off and pleasured. It was almost cute to you, mostly because it made it much more obvious how much of a hold you had on him, and you enjoyed it. You enjoyed being desired.

  Following a few minutes of quiet, filled only with sounds of his panting and shuffling of you snuggling against his arm, he spoke up again through pants, slowly coming back into his normal headspace that was dedicated to caring for you, “Was… Was that okay? Are you doing okay?”

Your eyes half-lidded while you stared at him from his shoulder, you nodded with a smile spreading across your lips. The bliss of everything was still holding onto you, the giddy feeling that bubbled in your chest stemming from the moments prior. You just wanted to stay like this, cuddled up against him while you relaxed together in sweet silence, only broken occasionally by your back-and-forth comments about aftercare and gentle kisses to his collarbone.

When Eren finally decided to get up, still so delirious from the pleasure that he hadn’t even thought about how you were out of sight, it was only to grab a rag and some water from the kitchen. Then was back on the couch as quickly as he’d left, tidying you up and pulling you into his lap to cradle you. While you clung to him, burying your face into his neck, he leaned forward to grab your shirt from the floor, quickly pulling it over your head so you could get back to cuddling. 

You were feeling oddly clingy, more so than before. You just wanted to stay in his arms, snuggled up to his warm body. It was the most at peace you’d felt since you’d been taken. It felt nice. 

Suddenly pulling you out from your comfort, Eren pushed your face away from his neck, eliciting a whine from you as he grabbed the glass of ice water and brought it up to your lips, “Come on, you should drink. I know that I probably didn’t taste very good…”

Pouty about being pulled away, you snapped back playfully with a raised brow while pushing the glass away, “How would you know what you taste like?” 

His face twisted in embarrassment, his brows furrowing as he stammered trying to explain himself, “Well, I don’t, but I’ve just—I’ve been told it doesn’t taste very good.”

You giggled at his response, “That doesn’t mean you don’t taste good to me,” even though it was true that he tasted rather foul.

Slightly flustered, Eren quickly tried to regain control of the conversation, feigning confidence while placing his hand on your nape to push your face close to his, “Well why don’t you let me have a taste for myself so I can see?”

“Mm, how am I supposed to do that?” You asked.

“Like this.” He replied, pushing his lips against yours and dipping his tongue into your mouth before pulling away just as quickly, leaving you stunned at his sudden shamelessness.  

While you were still staring at him with your mouth slightly agape, he pushed the glass cup into your hands, forcing you to hold it as he guided it up to your mouth. Finally pulled out of your trance, you let out a small sigh and took a sip, the cool water finally washing away the bitter taste his release had left in your mouth. 

“I guess I don’t taste that bad,” He started, which on its own almost caused you to spit out the water, only to be shocked again when he continued the statement, “Or maybe I was just tasting you.”

You nearly choked while trying to swallow, yelling out afterward and slapping his shoulder, “Eren!”

“Shh, shh, just come here so I can hold you again.” He cooed, taking the glass from you and pulling you against him, “My angel.”

Pressing kisses to your head, he smiled as you snuggled into him, nuzzling your nose into the crook of his neck while he pet your hair. With both of you relaxed, it was quiet once more, the two of you cuddled into each other as the silence surrounded you, leaving you both to your thoughts.

Eren was thinking about what you’d said, about what you wanted if you won his “game.” Even if you didn’t remember it in the moment, he would feel bad if he didn’t give it to you eventually. Not to mention, you were smart. You’d end up asking about it again at some point. He knew you would, and the thought of it made him anxious.

It’s not that he didn’t want you to go into his room, it was just that the things he had out would be deathly embarrassing for you to see. Once he got the chance to clean everything up, it would be fine for you to come in. If anything, he wanted you to stay in his room. He wanted to be able to trust you enough to sleep in his bed with him, to experience that kind of deep intimacy with you; but with everything you’d done recently, he still wasn’t sure about it. However, he did have a somewhat peculiar idea about what you could do to gain his trust—one that would get the authorities off of his back too if he played the cards right. Your reaction to the idea would tell him all he needed to know about how much he could trust you too. It was brilliant—at least to him, it was.

As if your minds were parallel to one another, you decided to speak up and ask about what’d been promised to you, “Hey… am I still gonna get my reward since I technically won that game you mentioned?” 

“Funny you say that actually, I was just thinking about it,” he began his reply, tightening his arms around you so that you would be as flush against him, no space separating you, “And I thought about something else we could do that you might like a little more.”

Jumping to the conclusion that he was trying to back out of his past agreement, a frown formed on your face and you opened your mouth to scold him, only to be stopped with a finger pushed to your lips followed by his loud shushing.

“Shh! Just let me finish before you chew me out!” He hushed you, pressing kisses between your wrinkled brows until they relaxed, then continuing, “My idea wasn’t that different from yours. It’s pretty much the same. I’ll let you come into my room tomorrow, except I’ll also let you stay the night with me there.”

Again not allowing him to finish, you interrupted excitedly with a smile already taking over your face, “Really? In your bed? With you?”

Eren already spent many of his nights downstairs with you, but that wasn’t the same as sleeping with him in his bed. Sleeping in his room not only meant you were free from the unfriendly aura of the basement, but that you would have light when you woke up. You could wake up to the warm morning sun for the first time in a month. You’d missed it so much.

“Yes. With me.” He began again, clearing his throat and frowning at your repetitive habit of interrupting him, “But only under one condition.” 

Taking note of his annoyance, you stayed quiet this time, eyeing him as a way of silently asking him to continue.

“You need to call the police department tomorrow morning and tell them you don't want to go home.”

taglist; @kpostedsum @missyasma @localdepressedvampire @chateks @erenyeagerdrip00 @beclover @tiffanyy-21 @momoewn @alienvarmint @berriesandcrem @erenjagerwifee @Sashaisahoeee @jkeluv @bobateasilverpearl (ask to join, and since it's been a while let me know if you changed your username and want to be back on the taglist or leave it! <;3)

[katiekatdragon27]

Holy moly a rendered drawing!? And it's Flatland!? AND it's sort of gijinka-fied?!?!?!? Crazy.

Drip or drown fellas? Be honest lol.

Okay, so some design choices I wanted to point out and "explain":

A. Square does not look any different because he is peak performance. The whole thing of 2D creatures who live "water" and look like amoebas was too good to tarnish. I kept it simple, gave him some boots to help with gravitational pain n stuff on his feet, and he has glasses cuz I saw some character in the movie with them and I thought it would vibe well. He looks a little older because of them, but whatever. The nerd needs to look like a nerd.

A. Sphere I took so many liberties with. At first, I went with the most basic CEO fit I could come up with, found it boring, gave him a vest and bowtie, cut the bowtie for a normal tie and gave him rainbow suspenders, then gave him the bracelets for funsies. The most consistent thing through all the versions was the analog watch (that he probably can't read lol).

He doesn't really feel like a CEO anymore, but c'mon, in canon he's a gold sphere and the only metallic solid. He's gonna look flashy and extra. It's a given.

Are you reeeally a Flatland fan if you haven't drawn or edited an image of A. Square being yeeted like a frisbee?

I feel like this is a staple, and I found this really amusing stock image that just fit so well.

I made the whole Flatland species friend-shaped. As an OSC person (yes I'm working on stuff related to it give me a sec), I could not see the Flatlanders as anything more than the silly stick limbed creatures of that community.

Spacelanders are different, but that's more so because of how the book refers to them. "Spacelanders" in the book, although the context is probably just different 3D shapes, are addressed as people who have people systems who do people things. So, I designed accordingly. (Also, I did NOT want A. Sphere to look like that one Pacman TV show. I think I would have combusted before finishing if he did.)

These were some doodles I worked with for just looks purposes. The tendrils(?) on their corners are the longest ones on their bodies. Circles have them all mostly uniform cuz they're boring.

Below is a close up of A. Square, some progress photos, and the reference image of meme.

Thanks again, and have a wonderful day :)

[00127am]

signed with love and forever yours, chittapon

postage. ten lee & gn! reader, cursing, mentions of kissing, suggestive themes, mentions of the consumption of alcohol / being drunk, drunken kissing cost to ship. 712 words

is it unromantic to start a letter with the fact that i want to kiss you? because i do. badly. desperately. until my lips are raw and burned red. until i can't stand the pain of it anymore. and even then, i'd still kiss you. over and over and over until i began to crack and bleed. or until my lips went completely numb and i wouldn't be able to taste you on my tongue anymore.

that's my biggest fear. to lose my sense of taste. so that i wouldn't be able to taste you. and the coffee you drink in the morning and your mint toothpaste and the bland flavor of your chapstick. if i wasn't able to taste you anymore, i'm not sure we could make up for it in other ways. you're my favorite, after all. and thinking about it now, when you're not here for me to kiss, is nothing short of torture.

i don't think i can exist another second without kissing you. or touching you. or seeing you. all i can do is close my eyes and picture you and the way my hands would sit on your skin and my lips against your neck. and every time i reach out to grab you, to pull you closer so that i can feel you against me, i'm always grasping at air. i've learned to hate the air. or the solitude. it doesn't feel like you.

do you remember our first kiss? not the one you say is our real first kiss but the actual first one we ever shared. the one at the bar, in front of everyone else who didn't even seem to notice. the one that tasted like gin and shitty soju and you. it was sloppy and drunk. your hand was clutching my sleeve like your life depended on it and i fell off my bar stool trying to kiss you more. it's the kiss that you say was the most unromantic.

i think about it a lot. that kiss. i remember that i sat there after it happened and played it over and over again in my head. trying so hard to remember it when i woke up the next morning with a hangover that nearly killed me. i did remember it. and the feeling of you. but i've replayed it so many times in my head that i've worn the details out. i'd give anything to kiss you again for the first time. to taste you. to hear those pretty sounds you make. i know you don't count it as one of our real kisses. but it's my favorite.

i've been drinking that horrible concoction of gin and soju to try and replicate that kiss. it's not the same. and it makes me miss you. not just your kisses. i miss you. more than anything. more than wanting to kiss you.

about ten's love letters.

ten writes letters in pretty, practiced pose. he takes his time, looping every elongated letter and crossing every t with an elegant swipe of his pen. his words are recklessly chosen, every thought taken straight from his mind and planted directly onto the paper. his letters are intimate and honest, burning you down to your core with every earnestly longing word.

he writes on refined paper, filling pages and margins. he tries to make his notes look as romantic as possible, like the kind they show in movies or the historical dramas you adore ever-so-much. each and every letter is imprinted with a million and one kisses from him (you've watched him do it, slightly irked that he wasn't just kissing you) and sprayed with his cologne. ten often doodles on the envelope and on the back of the paper, silly drawings of you and him or whatever he saw that day that particularly interested him.

he likes it when you read his letters on a call with him. so he can hear every hitch in your breath and that lovesick lilt you have whenever you finish, showering him with affection for each and every sweet word he wrote. though that seems to only make his desperate yearning worse, leading to more letters and more incessant, whiny confessions of love over the phone. though, you wouldn't complain.

your mailbox

taglist. @evilsailorsenshi @yangasm thank you for supporting me! ♡

🧾 © 00127am 2024

[gittetj]

Ppffff, at this point the state of my drawing skills is just sad and I don't know how to make it fun for myself again.

The last couple weeks I've been trying a different approach where I've spent an hour or two most nights just picking away at the same drawing, because, for one, I'm so rusty it takes me hours to draw a character just standing around anyway, and for two, for the longest time, I've focused on always making something "finished" before I go to bed or before some other time limit, however sloppy and rushed it may be, which is great for finishing, but hasn't actually done anything for my enjoyment level or will to draw more stuff.

But, this picking-away-approach is not... working. I can keep picking forever - I fix something one day and then I come back the next and find a new problem, which will keep happening because, as mentioned earlier, I am not that great at drawing right now - my ability to see my own mistakes is way, way above my hand-eye coordination and visualization skill.

So I don't really know what to try anymore. I've been doing a lot of live figure drawing for years, which is fun and good practice and probably the only reason my wrist hasn't atrophied completely, but again it doesn't actually make me feel like drawing anything that isn't figure drawing. I never even look at my sketches again. They don't matter to me. Same thing with doodling random stuff. I've never been a doodler, I don't care for it and I don't stumble into inspiration that way.

I don't know, has anyone else been in this situation? What did you do about it? It's not really art block, it's more about that huge gap between what I can do mentally VS the time and effort it will take to do it physically that I just can't find the patience for.

[fictionalsownme]

EMERGENCY COMMISSIONS 💞

SKETCH $10 - COLORED $20 - RENDERED $30

Hi everyone! Unfortunately times have gotten very tough the last few weeks, I'm in the process of moving right now and things will be better once that's done but resources are running very thin until we can get there ;v; I'll explain in more detail under the cut for anyone who wants to know or is curious, but I'm not here to trauma dump or guilt trip or anything 💞 I also want to say that I know times are incredibly tough on everyone right now, so if you can't support, please don't feel bad! 💞

I'm gonna keep it super cut and dry so no matter what you want, if it's a sketch it's $10 total, if you'd like it colored it's $20 total, and if you'd like it rendered it's $30 total. Can be fanart, OC, self insert, anything you want! If you want an extra character we'll just take the base price and multiply it by the number of characters :) prices are negotiable, especially if doing multiple characters!! And if you want to support but can't afford $10, just let me know! Any little bit helps, I'd love to do a little doodle for you or something like that :)

Payment is through venmo, kofi, or paypal! Please DM if you're interested, thanks for reading :)

----

So yeah to kind of explain what's going on, I moved out of my parents place two years ago, and recently we realized that we just can't afford it anymore, so we're moving back in :) we're actually very excited about it, I have a wonderful relationship with my family and it'll be a great opportunity to save money and set up our futures a little bit!

The problem came up when my dog got sick. She's a nine year old pitbull mix, we've had her for five years now. She is the absolute sweetest girl in the whole world, and we found out this last month that she has heart failure. I won't keep you on the edge of your seat, she is doing much much better now. But it took lots of expensive tests, medications, and even an emergency vet visit at 2am to get her back to this point. You can probably imagine that considering we were already running out of money to the point that we have to move back home, these unexpected expenses have completely crippled us financially. We're very lucky that she's doing better, since there were a lot of treatments she would've benefited from that we just couldn't afford.

Now, all we need to do it make it through the next five weeks paying rent and utilities and groceries and stuff-- and we'll be pretty much home free, including being able to afford more treatments for her. So yeah! Commissions will hopefully help us across that finish line. Thanks again for reading :)

ps, this is my dog. her name is Asia :)))

[novemberfyshenuke]

Trigun AU

I was crying over my exams, so I went ahead and doodled a little more on the dentist au to cope. Here are the headcanons I came up with lol

Livio

Originally, Livio was meant to be a coworker or even an assistant to Knives in his clinic but I had a revelation. I think there's two things he is most likely to be: A dancer and self defense trainer. No one really expects a bulky guy like him to be so free flowing like that. I think it brings such a fun vibe to him.

He has a space above Knives' clinic and can often be seen picking up children from the ground floor.

He grew up in the church with Nico so he's someone who values God.

He slouches as if to make him smaller. The guy struggles to be stern with his students.

Razlo

Razlo is most likely a prosecutor. Livio grew up in a dangerous and terrible environment before he was brought to the church, so Razlo can be fiercely protective over him. That doesn't mean he hasn't hurt him at some point.

Razlo is musically skilled. I like to think the two of them have a thing going on where Razlo starts playing a random tune out loud and Livio's starts vibing to that.

Meryl

She's a journalist. Well, more like a blogger. Milly and her grew up in the same neighborhood and that's how she met Roberto. In her mind, she admires him and his job. As she grew older though, she did come to realize Roberto isn't the flawless role model she always thought of.

She's very perceptive and quite the smart cookie, but tends to get ahead of herself when she's too excited.

Loud unintentionally. It does benefit her with her work at times, but hanging out with friends? Just bury her six feet under, won't you?

She's studying accountancy because. Just because. I see her being stressed out at the data she's had to recompute for the past hour because Vash is being too loud.

Milly

MY GIRLLLLL

She works part time in a cafe/ restaurant her family owns

Roberto is her uncle (DON'T ARGUE WITH ME)

She's really strong from the amount of groceries and stocks she's asked to carry by her family

Also studying accountancy because she saw how determine Meryl was with her studies.

I guarantee you she finishes the homework first and Meryl asks to doublecheck her answers to see if she (Meryl) got it correct.

Many would call her naive but really, she just likes seeing the good in people. Her parents raised their kids that way afterall.

Her family's restaurant is where the gang hangs out most days.

She's really into motocross and that's how she and Nico bonded over.

Isn't really sporty but will definitely join and demolish you in basically any sport. Basketball? Just try dunking that ball when she's guarding. Hockey? Bro those bruises are going to hurt.

She's got really good luck and she's also really good at board games.

She does tend to get overly emotional though and acts before thinking. Meryl is always quick to swoop in and steady her in these situations.

Nicholas D. Wolfwood

He's an actual priest. I know he has a lot of repressed feelings because of his duties. I mean. His entire inner monologue is just, "You shine so unbelievably bright. You create hope for the people around you like the very god I worship. But it's not like I'd kiss you on the lips or anything or...or whatever."

He's definitely looks older than he actually is.

Weak lungs when he was a child and he's still on medication. That doesn't stop him from smoking though. Everyone around him is always telling him to stop but his response is always, "They didn't fix my lungs just so I don't make use of them."

He can't grow a beard. The best he can get is his stubble and so he is so envious of Roberto's.

He's always dropping bible verses and then gets corrected by Knives about certain facts from the book. He hates him for it.

Legato

He's a fashion designer. He loves being in the field just not as the main focus anymore.

Elegant af in public and yet so unhinged with his crew.

He's got a wonderful voice; probs does voice acting on the side for animated shows/movies.

I like to think everyone takes a look at his work and then research him only to be jumpscared by his alt lifestyle on instagram.

He's cringe as hell to his friend group ngl. He'd sing his early 2000s Avril Lavigne in that overtly cartoonish emo voice.

He's a little obsessed with getting Knives to model for him after they shared one class in college.

Elindira

An influencer and Livio's business partner.

Much stricter on lessons and I think that's why they're compatible.

She's also a lawyer, because I can see her fighting an argument for Livio and winning.

She's very mature...when's not with Legato. Then they immediately link and start bickering like siblings.

She's the type to use a number of pet names for everyone.

Red sportscar. Red lipstick. In her pajamas and wearing cat-eyed shades while holding her head because of the hang-over she has but she still has to pick up the tiny menace from middle school. (Zazie)

She's a wine aunt and you can't convince me otherwise.

Never had a bad hair day in her life

Terrible blunt about things it honestly causes more harm than good but she won't ever lie to your face.

Vash

He likes collecting happy meal toys and displaying them in a glass cabinet in the family house dining room. This has translated to him collecting every single mascot figurine from business partners and local businesses around the area.

In high school, he worked part-time promoting Milly's family restaurant by spinning a sign around in a beat up rented mascot suit. No one will ever know who the kid behind that giant dog head was.

Mama's boy...cough

He dresses like an 80s rockstar or a biker but he's never actually approached a bike because of Mama Rem's constant helicopter parenting.

People just assume he's a 'bad boy' because he has a piercing and is a little full of himself at times.

When he's not interning at Knives' clinic, he's an emergency medical volunteer.

He's always been more of an 'I excel in theory but not in practice' guy.

He once made a patient's gums bleed and had them sobbing because he was too focused on getting on with the procedure he messed up the prep work.

Sneaks candies from the jar on top of Knives' desk

He has a prosthetic because I think it's funny for boyfailure no.1 to randomly have the batteries die or it doesn't function correctly.

Dyslexic and was quite sensitive as a child so he often got picked on.

Knives

Boyfailure no. 2 is a well-known specialist who's always rebelled against his mom but still ended up following her footsteps in the field.

He's lazy. He really feels disgusted having to stick his hands in someone's mouth cavity, but dang does his morbid curiosity always win.

I like to think he's mellowed out here because Vash and him watched My Little Pony and at the same time Superbook. He's like super confused and yet enlightened by all these moral stories and going, "Yeah, you're right, Jesus. Twilight Sparkle did deserve better!" or something...

His older cousin, Tesla, always picks on him for going by Knives rather than the name their mom picked out for him.

Do I think Knives is a kid who decided to pick a chosen name when he was 12? Yes. Yes I do.

He excels objectively and fails miserably when it comes to subjective things.

He wears sandals. Rem always got him and Vash those Velcro strap shoes so he, although he doesn't want to admit it, doesn't know how to tied his laces. He also refuses to search it up because he's convinced himself that Vash has this wagered war of who learns from the youtube video first.

He has difficulty accepting affection despite having Vash and Rem around because as a child, Vash came first. He needed to be prioritized.

Imma get to the others another time.

[kafus]

kinda crazy how writing is far from my main hobby but it was also my first hobby? not by much, but i really started taking my stride with doodling and art at age 7, yet before that at age 5 i was writing self insert pokemon fanfiction (i didn't even know the term "fanfiction") on my mom's windows xp computer in microsoft word, and she still has all her files from back then so i can still access those stories today lol

a friend of mine asked me recently how to start writing and it occurred to me i had no idea how to answer because i've been writing basically as soon as i was able to. i wrote stories on looseleaf in school, stories on my mom's PC, i poured way too much effort into my english school assignments as a child, i've always been writing. as a kid i even said i wanted to be a writer/novelist when i got older

it's kind of unfortunate how far i've strayed from writing. there's a lot of reasons i didn't write a ton as a teenager and why i write so sparingly now, but the main two are a whole lot of bullying and disparaging comments from people i considered my friends about my writing around age 13/14, and also... my DID? i was so frustrated with being unable to write anything longform or stay attached to characters or ideas for such a long time but it turns out it's because i was switching all the time, having host changes, the works. i don't really lose attachment to characters or ideas all of a sudden anymore now that i have more of a grip on that than i used to

but even still, i never really gained back the level of motivation for it that i had as a kid. as a kid i wrote a 21k word pokemon fanfiction as a freaking 7 year old and it's still the longest thing i've ever written. i literally peaked age 7. now i'm struggling with like, ohhh i want to write a multichapter fic about this likodot boarding school AU i came up with, but i'm terrified to even try because surely i'm going to give up before i get far, surely i am still the teenager with no consistent grasp on identity who's also insecure about her writing and will never finish it... but like man. that's just not true. i want to take baby steps to being comfortable with trying larger writing projects again

i don't think writing will ever be my main hobby again and i love art dearly but at the very least when i do have something i want to write i hope i can form the right mindsets to do it. when i manage, i love writing. (i've also found that compliments on my writing stick with me for literal weeks and mean so much to me in a way that art doesn't? i think because someone took time and energy to really engage with the work, in a way that most people can't or don't with art which they just scroll by on their twitter feed. i still super appreciate it of course but writing is so vulnerable and special and the act of talking to readers is so social... idk!)

[valiantstarlights]

trick or treat!

(im going around my favourite tumble moots trick or treating. it can be anything you wanna share, no pressure! a snippet, a doodle, even a reading rec! even a trick if u can think of one (●'◡'●) )

I don't know what constitutes as a trick, so treat it is 😂 Here's a snippet from Vampire!Dream Soulmate AU/Lord Dimitrescu Dream AU Chapter 2 🧛‍♂️

Note: This is still subject to change so please proceed with caution. 🙇‍♀️

Hob glances up nervously as Mrs. Constantine watches him eat, liver spotted arms crossed, and one bony hand holding a wooden spoon with a handle that has a sharpened point. It reminds him of those sharpened prison toothbrushes in movies. A shank? A shiv?

She has been acting strangely (well, stranger) ever since he arrived last night. She didn't invite him inside after she opened all the ten thousand locks on her front door, only watching as he entered sheepishly and apologized for coming back past sunset. She said nothing and only redid all the locks, then pointed towards the dining table after she finished her task. A lukewarm bowl of stew had been waiting for him beside half a loaf of garlic bread. She had stared at him as he ate yesternight too, until he finished eating everything. Then she locked herself inside her room, leaving him to clear the table, wash the dishes, and turn off the lights.

And now, she is watching him eat his third bowl of garlic soup for breakfast while holding a wooden shiv-spoon.

Hob is pretty sure she was supposed to cook something else for breakfast, but he's too polite to point it out. Were he a ruder person, he would have declined eating the soup and demanded proper breakfast food. But he is English and has been taught to always be grateful to have food on the table, so here he is, finishing his third bowl after Mrs. Constanine ladled more soup into his bowl after he emptied it for the second time.

He sips another spoonful under Mrs. Constantine's beady eye and, unable to take the weird silence anymore, says, "Mrs. Constantine, I'm sorry, but is there something wrong?"

"No," Mrs. Constantine said. Then, ominously, "Not yet."

Wonderful. A cryptic answer.

"Well," Hob says carefully, "I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but...look, okay, your garlic soup is really delicious. I like the addition of the garlic bread croutons and the fried garlic garnish on top. But I don't think I can eat any more after this. And the guided tour starts in less than an hour, so..." He gestures vaguely towards the guest room with one hand, indicating that he has to go and make himself look presentable before going out. Mrs. Constantine had woken him up as soon as dawn broke, and Hob barely had the time to rub the sleep out of his eyes before he was being led towards the dining table.

He's sure he had a good dream too, though he can't remember what it was about now.

"That is last one," Mrs. Constantine says, her heavily-accented English a sharp contrast against the lightly-accented ones of the younger generation. She gestures to his bowl with her wooden shiv-spoon, pointy end towards him first. "Finish."

Hob waits for her to say more. At this point, he would welcome any additional information that would help him make sense of her strange (and lowkey alarming) behavior. But when nothing comes and she just stares right back, he sighs and does as she says.

--

Bonus doodle: Little Blanket Ghost 🖤

I rarely draw these days, but this is my art suggestion for the ghost square of the monsterfucktober bingo card, which @gil212 made even cuter in the final version. 🥰

I hope you enjoy these treats, and thank you so much for trick or treating! 🎃🍬

[crazysodomite]

artist quastions

1. Art programs you have but don't use

Probably CSP. It's one of the few software I actually legally bought. But their new monetization policy is just not for me. It's a genuinely good program for artists and I may use it again in the future (especially for the 3D functionality. If that hasn't been priced out yet...). I also have SAI installed. It's fun and runs very smoothly. I should use it more often. I also have krita if i want to do frame by frame animation.

2. Is it easier to draw someone facing left or right (or forward even)

I usually flip my canvas often so it's kind of a 50/50. It depends on the character if they're easier to draw facing forward or to the side.

3. What ideas come from when you were little

Man... I honestly don't know. As a kid I wanted to make a pet game (similar to neopets I guess) where you could earn currency and buy stuff and dress up your pet. I still really like pet games and collection games and trinkets. I would love to make a trinket collection game.

4. Fav character/subject that's a bitch to draw

Industrial landscapes and scenes. Painting a factory or trains or roads being repaired is fun. Until you actually have to do that....

5. Estimate of how much of your art you post online vs. the art you keep for yourself

It used to be maybe 90/10. Now its probably 40/60. I used to just. Start a painting and always finish it and post it. I didn't really sketch or doodle stuff without finishing it or give up on paintings and discard them.

Now I like doodling and exploring stuff on my own more. I have a ton of files that are just 20000 layers of different sketches. I also discard artworks much more often.

6. Anything that might inspire you subconsciously (i.e. this horse wasn't supposed to look like the Last Unicorn but I see it)

I honestly can't tell. People don't compare my work to anything often. I can't tell if it looks like anything...

7. A medium of art you don't work in but appreciate

Traditional art. 3d art. Animation of all kinds. Fibre arts. Sculpture. Film. Writing. Theatre. Music. I mean yeah. All. Art. Very broad very vague answer but it's trueee. I appreciate and am inspired by everything I see

Less broadly... Watercolor painters...

8. What's an old project idea that you've lost interest in

I am starting to not be interested in anything....... When I was a child I used to have an 'ask blog' of sorts for my characters. I don't really have anything like that anymore :(

9. What are your file name conventions

Gibberish unless it's a commission. Comms get labelled with the customers name.

10. Favorite piece of clothing to draw

I like drawing the nude figure 💯💯💯. Mmm probably gloves or hi-vis gear. Work clothes. Overalls. Rubber boots. Belts and harnesses.

11. Do you listen to anything while drawing? If so, what

Usually music or youtube videos. I often get anxious and scared so I draw with a single song on repeat to keep my mind off it.

12. Easiest part of body to draw

Arms and legs... Probably... Maybe breasts also.

13. A creator who you admire but whose work isn't your thing

I can't tell. If I admire someone's work I consider it to be 'my thing'. I think there's certain people whose work ethic and drive to create I admire while not really being interested in the subject matter.

I admire artists from dA or FA who draw 'weird' things or their gallery is filled with the same thing over and over, or just people who are laser focused on their subject matter of choice. I'm fascinated by 'widely known in narrow circles' type of thing. I love extremely niche communities 👍

14. Any favorite motifs

Industriallllll..... Concrete. Grime. Rust. Metal. Sparks. Pipes. Wires. Blood and gore. Dilapidated and abandoned places. Small places and things not always noticed. Scary and cute things ^_^

15. *Where* do you draw (don't drop your ip address this just means do you doodle at a park or smth)

Usually just at my desk.

16. Something you are good at but don't really have fun doing

This is a hard one.... I usually choose to draw what I enjoy.

I guess rendering if I was forced to render something I don't like?

17. Do you eat/drink when drawing? if so, what

It depends. I drink tea in all circumstances.

18. An estimate of how much art supplies you've broken

As a child I broke a wacom intuos tablet I got as a gift. Still not over it because it was quite expensive. Don't think I broke anything else unless breaking my computer also counts. I broke several laptops as a child...

19. Favorite inanimate objects to draw (food, nature, etc.)

FACTORY 💯💯💯 Nature and plants too but the prize has to go to industrial infrastructure. Even if I'm not good at it.

20. Something everyone else finds hard to draw but you enjoy

Hands 🙌. Animals ? Various textures ?

21. Art styles nothing like your own but you like anyways

I can't list them all 🥲 I love to be inspired by artworks that are nothing like mine. I really admire dynamic and expressive cartoon/simplistic styles. Artstyles well adapted for hand drawn animation are also amazing.

22. What physical exercises do you do before drawing, if any

I need to be actually doing this more. Squats, wall angels and just rotating my joints are my usual go-to. I also like to twist myself but idk if that actually does anything. I like hearing my spine crack 😄

23. Do you use different layer modes

I used to use multiply for shading but I don't anymore. I like using gradient maps and Hue/Lightness/Saturation layer modes. I also tend to just cycle through all layer styles to see if anything looks good. Overlay, darker/lighter color, add are useful on occasion. I try to not rely heavily on layer styles because it quickly turns into me agonizing over 2% opacity changes and shifting colors over and over. Instead of actually painting.

24. Do your references include stock images

Yeah. Sometimes. I just google or go on pinterest to find stuff I need.

25. Something your art has been compared to that you were NOT inspired by

I can't tell. People don't compare my works to anything.

26. What's a piece that got a wildly different interpretation from what you intended

I honestly don't know... Everyone has a different interpretation of any work and I enjoy hearing about people's opinions. I can't really recall a 'wild' interpretation...

27. Do you warm up before getting to the good stuff? If so, what is it you draw to warm up with

I try to! It's good practice. Usually it ends up in me hating the first iteration of a painting and re-doing it from scratch. But usually I just draw the pose/composition I want over and over until it looks good enough to proceed.

28. Any art events you have participated in the past (like zines)

Probably. I can't remember though.

29. Media you love, but doesn't inspire you artistically

I have no idea. I think I'm inspired subconsciously by everything I ever experience. It probably doesn't immediately show in my actual artworks but it's there.

30. What piece of yours do you think is underrated

All of them 💯💯💯💯💯

I don't really pay attention to how pieces are received. There's pieces I'm proud of and pieces I'm not. Other people either get it or don't...

@gothglam now its your turn ❗

[jeannos]

I'M CRINGE BUT I'M FREE.

every kid in this fandom MUST have their au phase where they make aus of this stupid skeleton, and I FINALLY got the courage to make one!!

I lied actually... I have like 6 sans/skeleton ocs... and 2 of them are self inserts... BUT ANYWAY this guy is the only one I posting publicly atm

btw this reference specifically is really old (I started drawing this in like- 2021/2022 I guess?? Idk honestly) but I never actually finished it till recently bc, yeah, I got super lazy... ironic isn’t it? I don't even draw Sanses like this anymore -_-

SUPER AMAZING AU INTRO ↓

THIS HANDSOME FELLA IS- IS- is...

...

he does not have a actual name yet...

I mean- I call him Dreamer!Sans but I'm not really sure if I'm gonna set with that yet, since I don't actually have a story/plot for him besides his purpose in the multiverse, but I do have some other ideas ;]

Dreamer!Sans is basically a protector of dreams, he protects mostly the realities of dreams (or the Dreamscapes, is what I like to call them) to make sure everyone from his au and multiverse have sweet and safe dreams.

Theres this things called Night Spawns or Nightlings who feeds from peoples nightmares and trauma while they are asleep. They oddly look like spiders... Dreamer is responsible for defeating these pests.

"But why?" you may ask.

Well... the Nightlings "power" to manifest bad dreams in your sleep can cause you depression, anxiety, paranoia, and much more, if they stay too long attached to someone, AND since they are really hungry they are trying to consume the dreamscapes of the person they are attached to. If they succeeds, one may never dream again (or woke up, in other words)

"What are Dreamscapes?"

Every time someone dreams, that person's consciousness is "transported" to this place, and each person has their own dreamscapes!! They are directly connected to people's consciousness and that is why they are so important.

SILLY BILLY SKELE INFO ↓

Hes mostly like classic Sans, very lazy, laid back/relaxed, and he enjoys puns a lot

but it's a little more extreme-

• He is always tired and cannot stay awake for more than 20 minutes without falling asleep again

• He aways looks tired/sleepy

• Sometimes he sleepwalks, he can do unbelievable things while he's asleep, from knitting and cooking to physically fighting or writing a quantum science research, all unconscious!

• For some reason sometimes he sleeps in super specific and random places, once he slept for two whole days inside Nightmare!Sans' castle and no one ever noticed... strange right? He wasn't even in a room, he slept in the kitchen storage the entire time lol

• He has been in and out of so many people's dreams that he probably knows EVERYONE, he has an incredible memory too!

• Sometimes he can't tell if he's really awake or if he's still dreaming, so he doesn't usually take things around him seriously. Which can make other people upset or annoyed that they're not being taken seriously.

• He learned to never try to find meanings in dreams that don't make the LEAST sense, and since he cannot distinguish which reality he is in because he is almost always dreaming- he will always accept anything absurd you propose to him.

You wanna make a birthday party for a giant unicorn baby? sure sounds fun.

You think Shrek is upset and needs help? yeah lets cheer him up.

Several alternate versions of him are fighting for some bizarre reason he doesn't understand?? yeah ok he can help, he don't mind.

• He snores when he's having a really deep sleep, he won't believe it if you tell him that tho

THE END!?

Well thats it! These are my ideas and thoughts about this Sans I created, I might and probably will add more things about him and his story later in other posts, can't wait to finally see his au takes more shape hehe~

also I will make another post about his magic skills and possible weapon along with more illustrations of him, so keep a eye out for more~~

heres a old doodle I made of him before finishing his ref, bye bye!! :3

ignore my old signature pls T-T

[huntinglove]

How about Apple Cider, Espresso, and Glitterbug for whoever you feel like talking about rn?

Hi hi!! Thank you so much for the ask!!

Apple Cider: What was your relationship with your F/O before you got together romantically? How did it change once you got together, and what were the most significant changes? (Also, what’s your F/O’s favorite flavor of juice? What’s your S/I’s?)

Alma and I were friends for a couple of months, before we decided to get together and go through with the possession ritual!

After they rescued me from the broken elevator, I started to stay late on campus on purpose, so they could show up and hang out with me!

We'd spend most of the night talking about random things and getting to know each other. They didn't keep many memories from when they were alive, so they were also re-learning a lot of things about themselves too!

Charlie and I clicked almost instantly, so it was a bit of love at first sight! I had just moved into town and I was looking for some friends, I ended up getting a dating app to see if I would meet any cool people, but I forgot to add "just looking for friends" to my bio and I'm honestly glad I did!

I remember Charlie passing out after I told him that I already loved him, but thankfully I was able to catch him before he hit the floor... I guess it was a very intense day for both of us!

Mychael and I became friends after he rescued me from the forest! I spent a few days in his cabin; and those days turned into weeks, and now a month!

We both ended up getting a crush on one another and we actually ended up confessing at the same time, which was a pleasant surprise! I was a bit nervous because I wasn't sure if he'd be into humans or not...

Espresso: Which one of you hears about anything the other one wants and immediately gets it for them? (Or is it both/neither of you?)

Alma can't exactly get me anything unless we're bound, so no surprises or anything, but while they were haunting the campus building they'd get me little trinkets, coins, snacks, doodles and anything else students left behind!

When I told them that I collect keychains, they started looking for those specifically, which I think is really sweet!!

I like to give them little mementos every now and again! I know they don't need to eat, sleep or anything like that anymore, but I'm still happy to "share" my food with them and offer for them to lean on me while they nap!

Charlie loves to bring me snacks and little keepsakes whenever he has the time to do some shopping!

He usually gets us matching stickers (he puts them on his shoes and I put mine on my phone case) and he always brings me a little bit of anything that he buys to eat while he's out and about!

I usually enjoy giving him stuff that's a bit more personal, like drawings or love letters! I also gave him a little plushie with a recording of my voice inside too!

Mychael only ever goes to the store for essentials, but when he visits the library he always brings back a couple of books that he thinks I'll enjoy, he loves reading them together!

He also collects flowers and berries for me whenever he goes on walks or wants some alone time. I keep as many of the flowers as I can, pressed inside my sketchbooks!

Whenever I go relax by the river, I usually draw any critters that come by, usually giving Mychael the finished sketches once I get home! I also bring him any and all pretty stones and crystals that I find on my way back!!

Glitterbug: What are things that the two of you do better together, or that you do for each other when one of you can’t?

Alma says that just being together is way better than haunting the campus all by themselves, things get pretty lonely most of the time and not everyone is patient or kind with ghosts...

They also enjoy eating and napping whenever I allow them to take over my body, little pleasures that just make them feel more connected to me, plus they're always very kind and praising of my body whenever they take over!

Charlie says that being in public altogether is a lot easier when I'm around. We both tend to overthink and worry a lot, but all that chatter in our brains goes away when we're next to each other!

It's also a lot more fun to play games when we're together! Even if it's not a multiplayer game, we're still cheering each other on and helping each other get better at it!!

Michael says that taking care of the garden and the hens is a lot more fun with me around! He says that the plants enjoy it when we talk and sing to them, so I guess hearing our little conversations have been making them thrive!

I personally really enjoy drawing while he's cooking or knitting, even if we're not saying anything out loud, it's nice to have his company and feel that warmth all around both of us!

[genericpuff]

I really wanna make a comic like you did but I feel so discouraged and idk... I wish I had your motivation and discipline :(

how do you do it?

I mean - and I'm gonna try and phrase this as best as I can without sounding curt - 'motivation' as people tend to view it... isn't really how you get shit done. Like obviously I had to be motivated to take on projects like Time Gate and Rekindled but that initial motivation isn't what keeps me going each week. People tend to have the general idea that motivation comes first, action second, but you actually need to take action in order to gain motivation, as the motivation to continue comes best from seeing the results of your work. And those results can only happen if you take action.

Discipline isn't the same as motivation, either. Discipline is not beating yourself over the head to force yourself to "do the thing" - rather, discipline can only come from creating routine. It's what I've done with creating comics, but it only came after a long time doing it. And when I say a 'long time', I don't mean a week or a month or even a year, I mean a solid decade of work. Before Lore : Rekindled, I was working on Time Gate: [AFTERBIRTH]; before that I drew Time Gate: Reaper; before Reaper I drew Uzuki; and before THAT I was in high school just doodling personal comics for myself (i.e. not for an audience). And every single project came with its own learning experience, audience, and results that motivated me to continue (though for some of them, I never did, a big part of growth and succeeding is knowing that failure is inevitable and some projects you just grow out of love with, even routine can't save you from not continuing a project that you're simply not enjoying doing anymore).

Drawing comics and writing is as routine to my day and life as going to work, eating, sleeping, showering, etc. even if I don't feel compelled to work, I'll still find myself picking away at a panel or two or coming up with a story beat to fill in where I'm going next. It's the kind of compulsion that comes not from internal motivation, but from not doing the thing that you usually do and that can only be gained from building habits and routine. I may not get the same amount of work done each day, some days I'll work on comics for 8 hours straight and others I'll only get a single panel done, but I still get something done (which is better than nothing, not getting anything done at ALL in the face of 'waiting' for motivation is where a lot of that discouragement can come from) and that's been reinforced into a routine that now feels effortless to do because I've been doing it so long. Just like building up any good habit like going to the gym or doing a skincare routine or drinking more water, it can feel impossible to do in the beginning, but the more you do it and commit to that routine - even when you don't 'feel' like doing it - the less overwhelming and impossible it feels and the easier it is to see it through.

As you fulfill those habits in the beginning and see the results of your work, THAT'S what gets turned into motivation to continue.

Take the motivation out of the equation in doing what you want to do, motivation is not the first step but the result of taking action. Don't wait until you "feel like it", take baby steps and start moving. If you're wanting to work on a comic, start with something small, like a single panel even. When I started out with Reaper, it would take me a month to get out an entire 18-22 page chapter; by the time I was finished, I was getting the same length of chapters out per week, and that was only possible after years of routine, practice, and polishing my workflow to the most efficient model possible (which only came with repetition and practice).

Of course, I wouldn't recommend people climb up to that output because it did take its toll on me, I'm actually currently in the middle of burnout from working on Time Gate: [AFTERBIRTH] and outputting 60+ full color panels a week, that's not something that a single person is meant to do and now I'm paying the price for doing just that.

But my point is, I'm not where I started - just like everyone else, I had zero clue what I was doing in the beginning, but I stuck with it long enough to finally get to where I wanted to be. This is the same advice I'd give to people trying to write novels, or learn an instrument, or even learn how to draw.

I think the only other thing I can recommend beyond that is finding a support network. Have someone to share your results with, whether it's friends, family members, or other people partaking in your craft online. I'm in several comic creating Discords full of wonderful people who are open to giving me feedback and celebrating when I hit milestones. Think of it like having an accountability buddy - it's a lot easier to pick up new habits when you have someone else there for you to hold accountable and to hold you accountable. At the very least, it helps you feel less alone in that initial suffering of building a new routine from scratch.

It gets easier.

But the hard part is getting started and sticking to it.

And that's not gonna happen with motivation alone. You just gotta pick up your pencil (or whatever tool you're using) and start, even if it's just a little bit at a time. Some progress will make you feel a hell of a lot more motivated than no progress.

[tophattrio]

TOP HAT TRIO ARCHIVES: Part 1

Warden: Look at all this lovely art of us! We could fill a museum! Professor: There's so much it seems like we can't keep up... Once-ler: ..... Y'kno what guys? I'm gonna take a break...

((A small fraction of my old old old trio art, most of which has never seen the light of tumblr (under the cut)! None of this is colored. Some of this is pre-blog or just... REALLY early-era Trio art, so some of it is... dated. Also, as indicated by the top, this is part 1. Meaning there will probably be more, LOL...))

((I hope it's okay if I ramble some fun facts in the middle of this!))

We're gonna start off with this silly lil doodle of the lads! This was drawn during the era where I did my silly crossover drawings, before I mustered the courage to turn them into an askblog.

Based on the date, I must've drawn this next one while I was in the process of actually making the blog... potentially their original "profile" images? Or just a doodle I did to get me hyped...

As you can see, all the drawings so far are pencil and ink... that's because (if I remember correctly) this is when I was VERY new to computer tablets! I felt more confident in my traditional art so I would slap quick colors onto the back of a bunch of ink-drawn replies and make minor adjustments with the tablet. I remember being hesitant to switch to a fully digital style since I felt the sketchiness was almost part of the style of trio? But I've come to accept change is good! Everything post-Greed M!A is all (or mostly) digitally lined (with the occasional trad sketch), but if you look closely at the trio in this (and many other) early-day responses, you can definitely see the pencil marks!

Unposted Thneedville High Trio!!! I was SO obsessed with the Once-ler Askblog AU's back in the Once-ler Fandom's hayday... they were a lot of fun to observe on the side and I wanted to be part of that in my small way, but unfortunately, I was a coward so I never did LOL... I'm thinking this was drawn in February or March 2013...

And, something I drew on the same page, Truffula Flu Trio!!!! I think I briefly thought about making it (and thneedville high) a sideblog but I felt like I couldn't commit for multiple reasons: (1) AU hype was dying down a little, (2) It was a bit too serious a concept for Trio; I wanted to keep them lighthearted and silly (covers bad end with a hand). And (3) I was still doubting whether or not my blog counted as a Once-ler blog (being only 1/3 once-ler) and whether I was valid to participate in events. Eventually I got over that fear when I joined Camp Weehawken and participated in the fandom revival of 2015, but the fear was definitely there at the very beginning and I hesitated to jump in on some stuff because of it!!

These were some of my earliest (unanswered) asks! I think for a while I thought I accidentally deleted the Pinkie Pie one, but it mysteriously came back one day?? I don't plan to finish these but might as well get some closure since I already drew them. I had to look up which troll typing was the one being used here so I might be wrong, I know nothing about homestuck except chapter 1 and 2 and whatever I osmosis from my mutuals LOL...

Peacock was drawn before I knew anything about Skullgirls...... within the past few years I recently watched her gameplay/storyline! She's defs a fun character. Trio are probs neutral about her. I'm not confident enough to do anything major with her, but I would love to cameo her more!

I got a few asks / M!A's about genderbent versions of the trio back in early 2013 and these were my doodles for that. The designs were based off of different designs floating around tumblr at the time that I liked. I'm not interested in doing this M!A anymore, but the dresses are cute!

Some glasses shenanigans I never posted for some reason?? (For reference: (1) (2) (3) (4).) It's silly stuff like this that make me realize Trio!Professor is a little bit like "Cheerful Mystery" Professor but like... waaaaay more tame HAHA (I never read the manga back then because I was upset they made Layton OOC, but from what I've seen he's... a lot more chaotic there). Which, ykno, good chance explains why Trio!Professor stays sane around Once-ler and Warden and their wacky selves.

Some wardlers and layclaires!! Also a few super old things I doodled out for Lovestruck M!A part 2 (including warden being a perv and oncie being flustered and confused, LMAO) but... idk if I have the energy to commit to it at the moment... partially bc thinking about getting an influx of shippy-type asks gets me overwhelmed and idk if I can commit to another magic anon all my magic anons manage to kill the blog somehow 😭, but ykno... saving the anons in my inbox in case I change my mind... Love these guys dearly regardless,,, <3

Some doodles of Layton and his rivals!! I think someone sent a small "Descole takes over the blog" M!A (hence the itty bitty chibi head LMAOO) but (again) I don't have the energy to commit to anything but vanilla THT right now. I still thought the idea was fun enough to draw out and anticipate in advance! If I change my mind y'all will know about it...

My first drawing of Wilson from Don't Starve!! I didn't even play Don't Starve at the time, but I wanted to do research if I was going to properly execute the magic anon and I fell in love with him immediately. Unfortunately he (and his game) became my new brainrot and I still feel really bad about that LAUGHS, but hey! Was worth it! Maybe someday I'll redo trio mods for DST...

I may have him cameo again, but potentially after his character update in Don't Starve Together eventually drops, of course, :3 chants give us lore lore loRE LORE-

Aaaaaand that's all I'm gonna show for now... until next time everyone!

PART 1 (you are here!) || PART 2 (TBA) || PART 3 (TBA) || …

[impostorsshow]

Hello Tumblr city I have nightly doodles

This time it was just finishing up old doodles since I only gave myself 2 hours, and uh. I also had a Garfield x Tom sketch but I decided not to finish that one also if you want to hear about my DSAF au that goes with the image click the read more below

Close up of the image along with the ref I used i wouldnt recommend clicking on any of my images for higher quality since my coloring is very unpolished

Anyway this au is pretty simple but I highly enjoy it so I'm going to rant about it past my bedtime - essentially, I looked at how the good ending is a pretty sad ending, and while it's great when the canon/best endings in games aren't the best outcome, I wanted to fix it /j. Specifically I wanted a good ending for Davenport, fuck the children fuck everything else let's take the morals of the Dave endings in the games and fucking run with them.

So i uh haven't replayed the game in a long while forgive me for mistaking a few details but it follows the ending where you salvage davetrap, and Jack doesn't go past the second layer of the flip side and never meets Dee, but instead of Henry possessing Jack or whatever the fuck happened there, Jack starts to work on a solution. I should mention this is a world where Jack never gets a new phone guy but listens to all of Henry's tapes - but Jack gathers the fact that daveyrap is unhappy because hes not a complete soul, and devises a plan. That plan is just to work with both Dave's, making sure davetrap doesn't cause his business to go under due to child murder but he can't completely stop him and working with flipside Dave to both figure out how to make a robot vessel that looks like Dave and could reasonably pass as looking like a human since it wouldn't need anything for programming or ai or movement that possession would be capable of, and to convince flipside Dave to try and be a complete soul again.

Because from what I've gathered, the whole soul thing means thag when the "child" or in Dave's case the part that doesn't want to deal with murder part of the soul goes away to the flip side, the soul is torn apart since there's still something with a mind in the animatronics, it's just left without the reason part of itself. If we incorporate remnant lore which I'm not going to go very far in it further exemplifies the point that Dave repossessing himself over and over tore his soul apart while normal dead kids just leave the remnant behind but whatever whatever Jack decides that if the two halves of the soul exist in one body again they can merge back together and become one soul capable of the full range of emotions, including happiness.

Also my jacks a bit fucked up in the head because this jack went to Vegas twice and killed the real Fredbear so he's on a slippery slope of almost becoming a Henry Miller pulling this shit and asking Dave to continue repossessing himself, but instead risking losing his soul entirely by asking him to possess something that doesn't have any connection to his dead body. And it works when the "it looks exactly like Dave but he can't go in the rain and doesn't smell like a rotting corpse anymore and also doesnt have nearly as many scars" robot vessel is built and the two try possessing the body. And then Dave helps Jack make a robot body for himself and is built in like 1/3rd of the time since Dave knows how animatronics work and not smelling is a pretty nice feature, except Jack doesn't actually *have* a soul so for all intents and purposes I have no clue how to fix that so the jack body is just sitting in the closet of jacks house useless but it's there.

And like then there's actual lore but I need to go to sleep since I have school tomorrow but Dave and Jack decide to keep running Freddy fazbenders considering Jack doesn't have a problem with murder, and the two soul halves in davetrap argue enough that the murder keeps to enough where Freddy fazbenders just seems like a hotspot rather than it actually needing to be a place in need of getting shut down for an investigation. That and Jack blackmailed the phone guy I forgot his name into helping them cover shit up in exchange for getting a hell of alot of freedom [for a phone guy it's a lot of freedom at least, Fredbears isn't a stranger to murder coverups even if it goes against his morals.] Also the nice part of Dave is only really staying with davetrap because he cares so much about jack because I do support Davesport but I try to keep it at a level of implication so it can be passed off as platonic if someone wants it to be

[lu-lus-dicks]

Still waiting for those cursed polycule designs lulu

I KNOW GIVE ME A BREAK!

The dopamine is driving all of my art and the dopamine says draw alastor pregnant.

I'll get to them, I have these things working in my drafts I swear!

I am working on them! Just need like 5 years

Rant below this line, you don't need to read

Plus unfortunately I do have a life :( I know, disgusting that I have a life but I have work I have to prepare for, uni homework to do (and trust me Animation homework isn't just a quick doodle, plus it's not even my only class, I have 11 different subjects in total at my uni and I will list every single one if you want me to), replying to your guy's comments, checking daddy nunalastors blog everyday and drawing them eating worms (most important one by the way), working on the nunwhiskers fic, trying to finish all my other art stuff I wanna post here (like for example, that Lucifer animatic I promised yall that I have been procrastinating on). There's too many of you who keep blowing up my inbox. I go and reply to one reblog and by the time I'm done at least 3 more appear. I love it but Jesus y'all really testing my typing speed. I checked my screen time during my drama class because my teacher was helping us realise just how little time we have in our lives and my tumblr screentime is 8 FUCKING HOURS A DAY. I DON'T EVEN LOOK AT POSTS THAT OFTEN ANYMORE. I can't even just not reply to your posts, y'all take the time to respond so I want to show that respect back but JESUS CHRIST I AM GOING MENTALLY FUCKING INSANE-

Haven't opened tiktok in a week because of this though so that's a big w but still

P.s. please do not stop blowing up my inbox, it feels great that someone enjoys my presense when no one in my school wanted to have anything to do with me

Anyway rant over. Pretend this never happened

[doodling-doodle]

More ABO?

If Alex is helping Kyle through heat, does that mean they are trying for a baby?

Doodle, we need answers!

I'll give you answers!

Kyle smiled after he woke up, not feeling like he was burning from the inside out anymore. He rolled over to curl up in Alex's arms, wrapping himself around Alex like a koala, feeling the grip tighten slightly, and a soft kiss to his head.

"Goodmorning, baby." Alex said softly, "how are you feeling?"

"A lot better..." He mumbled, curling up more. He could fall right back asleep if he wanted to, "I think it's over... thank you... for everything."

"Oh, darling, it's no problem at all." He smiled softly, kissing Kyle's head, "I'm glad your feeling better now. Wanna head to the mess hall, or, stay here?"

He thought for a minute. But shrugged, "let's go to the mess. I haven't seen any of them in a good few days now..."

Alex nodded, smiling softly and helping Kyle get dressed, holding his hand softly as they went out to the mess hall, where John and Phil had Iris with them.

She ran up to them, tail wagging and panting, making them chuckle.

"Hey, little girl." Alex said, petting her gently, "Come on, let's get food."

Kyle smiled softly, following Alex to their table with Iris trailing behind.

"You sure your actually okay?" Alex asked as they sat down, feeling Kyle's neck for warmth, since that was normally where he could feel it the most when he was in heat.

Kyle smiled, shaking his head, "I'm all good."

"Okay... just wanted to make sure." Alex said, smiling.

Kyle loved how gentle and attentive the Alpha always was. Whenever he was in heat, he was there. Whenever he was hurt, he was there. No matter what happened, Alex was there. If they were talking about making a decision, he would never, ever pressure Kyle into agreeing with him... and that was still going on.

"I should probably talk to Dad and see if there's anything I need to take care of." Kyle said.

"Just some training for the recruits at the track." Price said as he walked by, "Just talk to Ghost today after your done eating and see if he needs help."

He nodded, "Thanks, Dad." He said, smiling, "And pops."

"Hope your feeling better." Phil said as he walked past, smiling and patting his shoulder.

"You sure that you're able to?" Alex asked, "Your normally pretty tired day after..."

Kyle shrugged, "I think I'll be okay." He said, "If I can't do it, I'll just go back to bed..."

"Okay." Alex said, smiling, "Just finish eating, and We'll go find Ghost."

And they did, Ghost and Soap smiling when they saw them.

"Hey, guys." Ghost said, "How you feeling, Kyle?"

"A lot better, thanks." He replied, smiling, "I Just wanted to know if you needed any help with training?"

"Sure, if you'd like. It's fairly light today, so, you might just be off to the side."

He shrugged, following Ghost and Soap with Alex holding his hand and Iris at his side.

It was very light that day. A few Omega's were training that day, he could tell by the mixture of scents. Still, Alex was hovering over him and Ghost was hovering over Soap.

It ended at around lunch, and he and Alex went back to the mess, and then to their room, finally, and Alex left for a minute to get some snacks and drinks for them, leaving Kyle to scroll his phone and look through things.

He found something about an old friend of his expecting a baby.

Which made him think about the old conversations he and Alex had

They had talked about kids before, even before they got married and mated. He was never ready. Alex was, but he wasn't. He felt guilty for it, he denied his Alpha a family and that was always in the back of his mind. But Alex always said that he was never going to force him. He might bring it up every now and again, but he wouldn't pressure the conversation or decision.

At the time, he wasn't at the point of wanting children. He couldn't carry a child, he couldn't handle the thought of it. He'd been trying, but, he just couldn't.

But, now... whenever he was in heat, he just felt this overwhelming feeling of missing something.

And now he had to face the reality of what it was. He was thinking about how gentle Alex was with him. How gentle would he be with a baby? Their child...

He could already see Alex carrying a baby in his arms, gently rocking them to sleep or calming them down...

He could see himself doing it. He could see himself starting the family that Alex had wanted. He could see himself pregnant with that child...

He was ready. He just needed to talk to Alex about it...

But he didn't know how to bring it up. What would he lead with? Their last conversation about it was a little over a year ago, maybe Alex would ask again soon? Or maybe he was waiting for him to mention something.

Either way. He was ready. He was ready for a family.

Alex came back in shortly after, giving Kyle a snack and a drink before sitting on the bed with him.

"So..." Alex asked, "how are you feeling? Worse? Better? Tired?"

He shrugged, "Better. I think I just need another day or two to recover and then I'll be fine."

Alex nodded, "let me know if you need anything else, okay?"

He nodded, smiling and happily eating the snack Alex got for him.

"Well, turns out that one of the people that transferred here last week is pregnant." Alex said, "he was kind of freaking out in the mess, but, seems really happy..." He smiled softly.

"Wow... that's awesome." Kyle replied, "I... just wow. That's great. Can't wait to meet them... if he's still here."

"Yeah... I'd love to see that happen..." Alex said, looking down with a soft smile on his face.

"Alex..." He put the snack down, shifting closer to him, "I-"

"Kyle, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to start a conversation again." Alex said, cutting him off and holding his hands.

"No- Alex, listen-"

"I know, Kyle. I'm not going to force you to be ready. Don't feel guilty, just-"

Kyle covered his mouth with his hand, silencing him so he could quickly blurt out what he wanted to say, "I want a baby."

Alex blinked, freezing up entirely while Kyle took his hand away.

"Oh..." was all Alex said, looking down, but he teared up, smiling, "your being serious?"

"Yes- of course I am!" He said, quickly. He couldn't lie about that, he couldn't break Alex's heart.

Alex smiled, chuckling and looking at him, "oh, baby doll..." He said, hugging Kyle before knocking him on the bed and holding him, resting a hand on Kyle's stomach, "I'm so happy to hear that..."

Kyle smiled, but he just felt so, so guilty for not giving Alex a family sooner. But he knew that Alex would never blame him for that.

"Kyle, are you sure?" Alex asked, "I just need to know this for sure..."

"I'm sure, Alex." He said, smiling, "I'm sure."

"Good..." He pulled up after kissing Kyle's forehead, "good." He looked down at Kyle's stomach, scooting down, pulling Kyle's shirt up and kissing all over his stomach.

Kyle chuckled, running his hand through Alex's soft hair, "I'm not even pregnant yet, love." He said, smiling.

Alex didn't pull away, in fact, he just nuzzled Kyle's stomach gently, "we should still get you a test, just in case."

"Good idea." He said, sighing, "I'll stop taking birth control. Next time I'm in heat, I... We'll see what happens."

Alex nodded, pressing one more kiss to Kyle's stomach before crawling back up to hold onto Kyle, "That sounds good... Oh, I already can see you with our little one. I hope for a girl... What about you?"

"I'd love a little girl." He smiled softly, curving his body into Alex's, "That sounds perfect..."

They, of course, would love their child no matter what.

About six weeks later, Kyle sat in the bathroom, waiting for the results on the test. He was nervous. He didn't know what to do...

His timer went off, and he worked himself up to pick up the test and see what it said...

Negative.

He teared up, throwing the test away and leaving the bathroom, to where Alex was sitting in their bed.

"I-I..." He went to it next to him, sobbing slightly.

"Oh, baby..." Alex reached out to hold onto him, "It's okay. It's okay."

"N-No... I'm not pregnant..."

"You were still on the pill. Don't worry, okay?" He kissed Kyle's forehead, "It will be okay. We'll try again, hun, don't beat yourself up."

He sobbed into Alex's shirt for a few minutes. What type of Omega was he? Not even able to start a family.

His Alpha didn't care, though. He was just worried about him.

"One day, Kyle..." Alex said, "One day, we will have the child we want."

He hoped so...