#these people know they’re causing pain to vulnerable people and they keep doing it anyway

[edandstede]

I am so sorry for the hate you’re facing right now, is there anything at all we can do to help? Please don’t listen to assholes, they’re just that and they aren’t the majority I promise you that. Keep being you ❤️

thank you, i appreciate the kindness. people are being really sweet and supportive, showing me a lot of love, which is all i can ask. nobody need do anything else <3

[phoenixkaptain]

There is something so comforting about characters who choose not to be evil.

Like, Luke Skywalker stands on the precipice of not coming back, almost let’s his rage and fear overtake him, and you can see him realize that. You can see the moment where he makes the conscious decision to take the hard way out of this. You can see him choose to stop, choose to control his own impulses, and choose to show mercy on a being that has not showed or been shown mercy in a very long time.

Or Cissie King-Jones in the Young Justice run. Her school was attacked, the woman who got Cissie out of her horrible living situation was murdered, and Cissie was inadvertently shown the tape that the murderer made of killing her, where he made her beg to live but shot her anyway. Cissie is rightfully pissed. Cissie hunts down the shooter. Cissie makes him beg for his life, makes him fear that she’s going to kill him. And, Superboy comes in to remind her that she doesn’t want to be a killer, but it’s Cissie herself who stops. It’s Cissie herself who realizes that she doesn’t want to be in this position, that she’s scared and feels alone and vulnerable and she doesn’t know what to do. Cissie pulls herself out of the situation, she decides that she can’t kill someone who isn’t worth going to prison for. She makes that choice, even though it’s the most difficult choice she’s made.

Peter Parker’s violent thoughts are often portrayed as a joke, especially early on, but Peter is always holding himself back. He is constantly making the choice not to hurt people. He is always conscious of his super strength and how easily he could hurt someone or kill someone with it. He is always aware of his own potential to cause pain. But he chooses not to. He chooses to keep his touch light, even when he could make the excuse he was distracted. He is always making that choice, he always makes the choice to be a better person, he always tries so damn hard to be a halfway decent person, even on days he wishes he could be awful and selfish and cruel.

There’s just something about characters who have walked that line. Characters who stopped themselves and thought “I don’t want to do this.” Characters who are scared and who worry that their capacity for evil alone makes them less good. Characters who decide that it doesn’t matter, because they’re going to try to be a better person whether the universe allows it or not.

I don’t know. I just love those characters who had to go through Hell to be what they eventually become. Characters who are broken down and build themselves back up even stronger. Characters who put the reins on their impulses and decide that they’re in control, not their instincts and not anybody who might desire to control them.

There’s something immensely comforting that some of the most powerful characters in media are not made any less powerful or any less heroic because of things they cannot control, like their thoughts. They can only control how they respond to those thoughts. That’s what separates them from villains, that’s what makes them so powerful, they don’t choose the easy way out of things. Their willpower is stronger than steel. And it’s nice.

[jacensolodjo]

Sometimes I think about B’Elanna Torres.

No, no stay with me for a second let me gush abt my fave mixed engineer.

I think about this woman who, before the Maquis, she had nobody. Her mother was only the Klingon gods know where, her father fucked off when she was a kiddo because he was a racist prick. She was teased mercilessly by people she was, arguably, smarter than simply for the crime of being part Klingon.

And like, yeah we talk about how Star Trek timeline is ~post oppression~ but if you watch Voyager and DS9 you know that isn’t true. It comes in different forms, different species of intelligent life. But it’s there. The biggest of which of course being the Bajorans vs. Cardassians.

And here we have B’Elanna Torres. Half-Klingon, fighting against that half of her all of her life because she was told since birth it was Bad Wrong. But she joins the Maquis. She has a spirit that still hasn’t been crushed. She was ‘betrayed’ by Starfleet (read: dropped out because things were racist there too). She is a good person no matter how much she rails against the idea of being so. And she finds a family with the Maquis. She doesn’t start thinking about it until of course suddenly she’s trebuchet’d across the fucking galaxy to a totally different quadrant.

And she is once again surrounded by Starfleet, made to feel Bad Wrong. She’s smart, exceedingly so. She’s still acerbic even to Chakotay who she is arguably closest with next to Seska who turns out to surprise be one of the enemy (aka Cardassian).

She has earned her attitude. She has earned keeping people at a distance. Nothing she could say or do would make things better or worse anyway, so why not just protect yourself?

But then. Shock of all shocks. Janeway appears like an angel descending from the fucking clouds (insert harp music) and she almost immediately trusts B’Elanna’s word despite their first impressions not being too great. Janeway was there because of the Maquis. B’Elanna is Maquis. But she’s a damn fine engineer. Janeway makes this honestly almost out of left field decision to trust Chakotay’s word (perhaps with Tuvok admitting despite everything that B’Elanna is as good as Chakotay says cause he’s seen it and he knows they can’t afford to lose such a fine engineer in an unknown scenario).

B’Elanna has the total capacity to be loyal. She’ll be a pain while being such but she is loyal. And everyone learns that. Her family is no longer just Maquis. But it’s Harry Kim, it’s Kathryn Janeway, it’s even on some level Neelix of all people. And then we add Seven of Nine down the line who instantly recognizes B’Elanna’s skill and authority regardless of how mean B’Elanna is for a while there. Given her trials when she first got the job I don’t blame her being on guard with Seven especially given this is an ex-Borg we’re talking about. Seven doesn’t sit there and question B’Elanna’s orders, though, and that’s so key (she may feel she has a better solution but she accepts B’Elanna gives the orders even if she does do stuff without orders for a while there). She is maybe the third person who has so quickly accepted who B’Elanna is and what she’s capable of and that is just so uplifting. Sure, they’re antagonistic for a while but things settle. They recognize each other’s skill and expertise. It’s never explicitly them jockeying for position as the go-to engineer, they’re just made to do that by the script on a meta level. 

But the Voyager crew. They accept she is who she is. ‘Forehead and bad attitude’ and all. She is accepted without hesitance for the first time in her goddamn life and I’m not supposed to be emotional about that decades later? To say nothing of getting to see this brown woman, who is a successful engineer with a family, struggle with things like Depression. I mean, at that point non-white people weren’t allowed to show emotion like that. They weren’t allowed to be vulnerable. Still aren’t on some level now. Especially women without being accused of having some motive or whatever. She is also allowed to be angry without being accused of it being her time of the month every time you turn around. In fact I can’t remember a time she was ever accused of PMSing when she had an outburst. Though I guess it depends on how you feel abt it being blamed solely on her klingon side. 

But she gets through it not exactly through the power of love but the power of acceptance not just of the emotions she has that are negative (depression) or deemed negative (anger) but of her as a person. Bad shit happened, she can’t change it, but it’s okay to feel like shit abt it, too. They don’t ‘save’ her. They stay there while she saves herself.

Lieutenant B’Elanna fucking Torres. Chief Engineer. USS Voyager. She is the hero of her own damn story whether you like it or not. With a little help from her friends family.

[proudfreakmetarusonniku]

Anyway if I see ANY fucking negativity towards any streamers connected with Techno right now I will punch the wall. No matter what you think of Dream or Ranboo or Wilbur or WHOEVER, they’ve just lost a close friend of theirs. Someone who was an idol for a lot of them. Even a lot of streamers not as close to him were work colleagues. Even if they didn’t really know him, they sure as hell knew more than we did, and considering how distressing this has been for all of us, it must be awful for them. And this goes generally- now is just not the time for any sort of negativity- but applies especially when it comes to how they display grief. That’s something incredibly personal and vulnerable. Whether that’s very raw and messy or collected and clean, whether that’s something they’re willing to show in public or if they’re keeping it separate from their professional life. Whether they want to talk about it at all. None of this is a sign of being fake, or not caring, or being disrespectful, or anything like that. Grief is complicated. On that note, don’t bring up the topic unprompted. It’s entirely possible they’re not ready to process it at All yet, it’s been a day max, and even outside of that complete strangers bringing it up in a possibly insensitive context isn’t helping anyone.

Just… I really don’t want to have to make this post, but I’ve already seen people start to behave disrespectfully in YouTube comments and stuff. Please don’t do that. Please don’t cause more pain in an already painful situation.

[valssecretshit]

🌡😷🤧👃😭✨💊😔

Masky and Hoodie plaz

OOOO GOODIE A H&M ASK

a

🌡 tim tends to run moderate fevers and usually it’s unnoticeable cus he has the mask on but he doesn’t sweat a whole lot, his face just flushes a little. but tbh, when he’s running a high fever, you still wouldn’t be able to tell cus he probably would hide it well. brian tends to run higher fevers but he doesn’t feel hot, he feels colder. not when you check him but he gets chills and it feels like his blood is freezing up. you can tell when his fever is higher by just looking at him, his face will be super pale and he will be shivering like a cold dog.

😷 tim and bri/an both tend to still want to work and carry out orders although slendy never lets them when they’re sick. when they end up staying home they really don’t have any other choice BUT to rest, if they end up not fooling slendy. they both basically already wear their masks around the house anyways lol, plus if they didn’t they’d be unrecognizable, so they wear them around others and it still works effectively in not spreading it.

🤧 tim’s sneeze is moderately loud, it tends to spray a lot from how his tongue is placed in his mouth during release so it has wetness to it, he tends to cover up a lot of the time. they sound something like “hhuh- hhAHHTSSHUHh!!” or “hhAP-NNSHH!” when he’s stifling. brian’s sneeze is kinda naturally quieter, a lot less spray but he does sneeze in fits. they’re pretty long and can range from 5-7, he tries to hold them back a lot but they fail so hilariously. they sound like “hEHTSHH- eHhTSSSH! heIHHGHSHH- eHHGGNNXT- hYYEHGHHSHT- eHHIHPPSHH!! hEHHTSHOO!” and ofc he has to cuss at the end lolz.

👃 tbh tim’s nose is a lot less sensitive than people assume, due to him smoking a lot. the smoke kinda fucked up his nostrils and sinuses so now he’s pretty immune to a lotta things. i’d say on the sensitivity scale he gets a 3/10, but his nose does twitch when he DOES come into contact with something that irritates him. brian’s nose is actually a 6/10 on the sensitivity scale, he sneezes quite often. usually it’s just reflex on his body’s part, but it can be caused by hayfever, i see people giving him hayfever all the time lol. nose doesn’t twitch, i’m sad to say lol.

😭 both boys tend to whine in their heads when they’re sick, brian also makes little noises but never verbally complains out loud. masky tries to downplay his symptoms at whatever cost but it’s not the end of the world if someone finds out he’s sick, brian can’t really hide his pain like that so he’s more willing to be vulnerable than try to say everything’s fine lol

✨ feathers don’t do anything for both of them so rolled up tissue is def the best way to go. for masky you may have to try a lot harder to get a sneeze to come out cus his nose isn’t too sensitive, which obviously makes it more fun cus he’ll be wanting to sneeze but it just keeps sitting and growing 💖 as for brian he’ll hitch and start gasping for air between sneezes almost instantly in the first few seconds of the tissue being up there, and for as long as you have the tissue swirlin around in there he will just keep going on and on. for him you could also use lavender sprigs, if you have them.

💊 tim and brian take medicine like adults lol, they know they’re gonna need it. they don’t care what medicine it is, they’ll take it, however tim understandably feels weird abt pills.

😔 tim and brian sleep a lot longer than usual when they’re sick usually about 2 or 4 hours more than usual. tim is one to take naps frequently but not as much as he does when sick. tim tends to get snappy but not like aggressive, just shuts down conversations being made with him quickly. they both tend to withdrawal or at least try to with the other pastas. if you were their partner, first thing to look for with tim AND brian that others may not know, look for them whining or shaking in their sleep, that’s a sign of fever nightmares.

[bratz-kitten]

blockages that the placements need to work through 

here are some things i’ve been working on ft. the astrological placements that i believe they’re revelant to, in case anyone else needs this 

sun aspecting venus, harsh aspects to the ascendant - saying no. it’s not so much like... a need to say yes to please other people, but a fear of saying no and facing the repercussions of it. lately i’ve been trying to simply say no to things that make me uncomfortable because turns out i do have a great difficulty setting boundaries lmfao. when my male friends make a sexual comment about me, i just say “stop, don’t talk about me like that” and when people invite me to hangouts that i don’t have the energy to go to i simply say “i won’t go, but thank you for inviting me”. the most difficult part is dealing with the guilt that comes with refusing others, and i’m telling myself that it’s okay to piss people off if it’s to maintain my feeling of safety 

moon in capricorn, moon harshly aspecting saturn - letting myself depend on others. i’m coming to terms with the fact that i’m not as big of a lone wolf as i believe myself to be lmfao. like, it’s okay that i depend on my emotional bonds sometimes! it’s okay to allow myself to love with no restrictions, with no “but i can’t let them see me vulnerable”, with no “what do i get out of this connection?”, no “oh i have to be nonchalant about how much i care for them or else they’re gonna know they have power over me and abandon me” no. i’m letting myself write the dumb sappy texts, to make the effort, to show how much i care, to open up to others. i’m easing with my calculating instincts. i don’t have to drown in my loneliness and i refuse to spend a lifetime avoiding getting close to others in fear of them hurting me. i’m working on seeing my strength, like... it’s ok if they hurt me because i will survive 

saturn in gemini, mars in the 12th house, mars harshly aspecting neptune - taking action when i need to. especially in real life, i have a lot of difficulty with taking action. like, if i’m in an argument with someone, or if someone is actively pissing me off, my first instinct is to end the conversation and escape so that it won’t escalate. theoretically, that’s smart... in practice, it makes me gulp down a lot of situations in favor of keeping the peace, and it makes me live an entirely different life in my mind vs. in reality. like, in my mind, when something happens i’ll fantasize about being assertive and talking back to the person, about standing my ground. but in real life i just... quietly move to a different room. plus it’s difficult for me to feel things in the moment, like something will happen and i won’t register it but days later i will think back on it and be practically fuming in anger. these past few weeks i’ve been working on just, saying what i want to say. even if i’m aware the situation can escalate, at least i won’t have any regrets, and it’s made me realize that people aren’t as easy to anger as i thought them to be, and that i’m stronger than i believed myself to be 

moon harshly aspecting jupiter - allowing myself to break down. my moon opposite jupiter is at a 0º orb, and when i tell you i feel every ounce of it, i really do. like, my emotions are extremely disregulated. on one hour i will be at the highest of the highs, and then the next hour i’ll be crying on the floor telling myself i’m the worst person alive. which just... causes me to feel even more guilty about how i speak to myself, and about how volatile my emotions are, and then i’m just a mess of guilt and self-criticism and “stop acting like a baby”; i feel easily overwhelmed and like i’m doing way too much, overreacting to every possible situation. and then, an hour later, im just like.... emotionally numb. anyways, instead of making it worse by blaming myself for my emotions, i’ve been just. allowing myself to feel. no guilt, no shame, just allowing myself to feel bad because of the innate belief that i’ll get over this, i’ll move forward, it’ll get better 

venus harshly aspecting the ascendant - dealing with a poor self-image. i have a lot of issues with my body image. so, instead of analyzing my body from every single angle and blaming myself for it, i’ll just. not look in the mirror. like, you know when you’re a kid, you’re barely aware that you have a body - it’s there, it functions, it helps you play and eat and grab things, but you don’t really spend time thinking about it’s shape and appearance because it doesn’t matter. that’s the mentality i’m trying to work with right now, that my body is there: it deserves food, exercise, to be washed and dressed in comfortable clothing, and that’s that. i’m releasing myself of the judgment that comes with my poor self-image 

natal saturn retrogade - stop buying things just to watch them sit there. like, i buy things that i don’t even use. or i buy things that i plan to use, but then i end up not using them out of guilt of having bought them, or lack of energy to use them, or fear of using them and messing up. so, what i’m doing is grabbing all the things i don’t use, and if i truly don’t want to use them, i’ll simply discard of them, and if i do want to use them, then i’m making plans to do so. no letting them sit in my room and feeling guilty every time i look at them 

mars dominance, mars aspecting personal planets, mercury aspecting pluto, debilitated moon (in capricorn or scorpio) - stop verbally insulting others in discussions. the point of having a discussion is to explain both perspectives and come to an agreement/compromise, not to try to win. unfortunately, this is something i’ve always had great difficulty understanding lmfao. as soon as i’m in a discussion the point stops being to shed light on the situation but to use the words i know will hurt the person the most so that they’ll feel the pain that i feel. when someone is not understanding me, part of me just wants to make them go through what i went through so that they’ll get it - especially if i have an emotional attachment to the person (for example, them being my family or romantic interest). this is extremely toxic and it’s giving me when your parents say “when i was younger i had it much more worse than you, and i’m going to somehow make this your problem”. so, i’ve been thinking twice about what i say to people. is what i’m about to say to this person relevant to this discussion, or do i just want my words to sting them so i can watch them crumble? i ask myself this question, and i try to show others the empathy that i want them to show me. 

planets in the 12th house, lilith in the 12th house - developing a better sleep schedule. i don’t remember the last time that i went to sleep before 5am, and this has greatly impacted my mental and physical health in general. like, i’ll go to bed extremely late, and then i wake up late and it takes me hours to find the strength to get out of bed because i just feel so shitty. the reason why i avoid sleeping early is because i struggle a lot with nightmares, because of my own paranoid thoughts and fears, and because it’s my “peaceful” time. like, during the day i have to deal with my parents being awake and... well, just existing in general, and i have to deal with my responsibilities and my family, but at night i get to just exist for myself and do whatever. but also, i struggle a lot with intrusive/paranoid thoughts that keep me from falling asleep. this is due to my anxiety and mental health problems, and to be honest i still don’t really know what to do to deal with this. like... the thing that’s helped me the most so far is to turn off my phone/computer since i get headaches easily, petting my cat until i feel calm enough to at least try to sleep, and to avoid taking naps throughout the day since that’ll just leave me with way too much energy at night 

[mc-lukanette]

*crawls over completely exhausted* No Canon Lukanette... Need fluff... maybe salt too...

Luka gave Marinette's parents a smile as he waited for Marinette to come downstairs, though to say he was concerned was an understatement. He and Marinette hadn't been dating for long, but he knew something was wrong due to her song singing even more stress-filled notes than usual. He wanted to talk to her about it, but also wanted her to open up to him herself when she was ready.

Wanting to focus on smiling for her when she came down, Luka shook off the thought and stared up at Marinette's trap door. Seeing that she hadn't come down yet - understandable given that she had no idea he was there - he pulled out his phone and navigated to her contact. However, just before he could tap on it, there was an abrupt, loud, and unusual noise coming from Marinette's room, followed by the sound of Marinette yelping and presumably hitting the floor.

Luka gasped. “Marinette!”

Not even thinking, he hurried upstairs, phone clutched tightly in his hand as he pushed the trap door up and let himself in.

Over a dozen tiny kwami were speeding around her room, each with distinct voices and one of whom he recognized as Sass. He'd initially thought that the Liberty was chaos, and it was, but there was something different about fifteen little melodies all moving around simultaneously and wreaking havoc. They hadn't even seemed to notice that he was there.

There was also a ladybug-patterned ellipsoid lying on the table in the middle of it all, though Luka's eyes fixated mostly on Marinette lying there on the floor, now staring at him with wide eyes as he took in the whole situation.

"L-luka!" she greeted, voice forced. "W-what a surprise! I mean, you must be surprised at my toy collection! See, there's—there’s this magnetism thing going on that lets them seem like they're flying and—"

She was cut off as one of the kwami accidentally dropped something to the floor, making her flinch from the loud noise. Even the sound all around the room was overwhelming, the little beings ignoring Marinette’s panic in favor of playing with her things.

That's when the tears started, subtly at first until Marinette let out a whimper.

Ignoring all the revelations he just went through, Luka hurried to Marinette's side, helping her up and checking her for injuries. "Marinette, are you okay—"

"You know!" she cut in, running her fingers anxiously through her hair. "You're not supposed to know!"

He took a breath, recognizing that he was going to have to deal with these revelations now. "It's okay. I promise, I'd never—"

"No, it's not okay!" she argued, throwing her hands out. "I've been guardian for just a few days and this—this isn't—! I already—and now the kwami are out—!" She slumped and dropped her gaze to the floor, ashamed. "I'm a bad guardian. I'm a bad girlfriend. I couldn't protect you from knowing!"

"Marinette, you're not a bad girlfriend. You—" He paused, something occurring to him. "Protect me...?"

He hadn't been Viperion for long, but Luka remembered the importance given to secret identities. He understood that it was a form of protecting oneself and one's loved ones, meaning that a permanent hero like Ladybug needed to keep hers a secret the most.

"Is..." His stomach twisted in knots as he remembered all the dates she'd had to either miss or postpone. He bent down, trying to look at her face, and when he still couldn't, he gently cupped her face and encouraged her to make eye contact with him. "Is that why—"

"Yes! That's why I have to keep cutting our dates short, and not being there for you, and not going on patrols with Chat, and why I haven't had time to take those stupid Adrien pictures down! I can't do anything right!"

At some point, the volume of her voice had finally drawn the attention of the kwami, who all stared at her like children watching their parent having a breakdown and feeling awkward about it. Luka paid them no mind, his heart breaking as he processed all the information Marinette was telling him while all he could do was pull her into a hug and just hold her.

"I'm sorry I found out like this," he admitted, running his hand up and down along her back. "I'm glad that I know but I would've wanted you to share that secret with me instead."

"I-I'm sor—"

"Please don't apologize, Marinette," he gently begged. "I hate hearing songs with meanings I don't agree with. You don't have anything to feel sorry for. If I had the ladybug earrings instead, I would've had to do the same thing as you, and you wouldn't have asked me to apologize, would you?"

She looked up at him, expression pained and full of so many burdens that he couldn't believe he hadn't seen before. He brushed her fringe aside and rested his palm against her forehead, concerned about how pale she seemed and worried that she'd stress herself to a cold.

She leaned into his touch, then further until he was forced to move his hand away. She buried her face in his chest, surprising him as she hugged him tightly. Her song turned from the harsh wail of an electric guitar to the mellow tones of an acoustic, and he sighed in a mixture of relief and happiness.

"...Luka," she murmured, lightly clutching whatever fabric she could reach. "The movie. We'll miss it at this rate."

He hummed, half in response to what she said and half in content. "You're so much more important than the movie."

His heart skipped a beat when she actually giggled, her grip on him loosening and the hug turning to something she did because she wanted to, not for comfort. "More important than Jagged Stone?"

He chuckled, burying his face into her hair as he returned the hug. "Always. Even my idol can't compete with my muse."

She leaned further into him, her melody picking up hints off a bell chiming happily. She almost knocked him over from how much of her weight she was putting on him, but he didn't protest and even enjoyed it; it meant she was trusting him with her secrets instead of shouldering the weight herself.

"I know I couldn't have known," he began, "but I'm sorry that our dates took up your time. I never wanted to cause you any stress."

"But I wanted to!" she insisted, jolting up to look at him. "It's just—it's been a lot, and—"

He placed two fingers against her lips before she could start rambling. "Marinette, I don't need to go on normal dates to have fun with you."

She blinked, waiting for him to move his fingers before asking, "Y-you don't?"

He smiled. "Of course not. I can hang out here while you work, while you do important stuff."

With a small, amused snort, she pulled away from him and wiped any stray tears away. "You're 'important stuff.'"

He grinned like the love-struck fool that he was, then shrugged. "Well, I'll still be here anyway then, right?"

"That's true." She paused, glancing off to the side in consideration, then looked back at him as she asked, "in that case... would you help me with something?"

"Anything," he answered immediately.

She pointed, his gaze drawn to her wall full of Adrien pictures. "Like I said, I haven't had the time, and... I've been wanting to remodel forever."

He was more than happy to help, and there was a selfish part of him that considered it far better than any movie they could've seen.

—————

It took a bit more time than either of them anticipated to take down all of the images, but between the two of them, it wasn't a hard job. The biggest time-waster during the whole thing was Marinette's rambling, but Luka welcomed it wholeheartedly.

Due to not watching much TV, he honestly hadn't heard about what'd happened when Jagged Stone had been at the bakery and the camera crew had invaded Marinette's privacy, and he couldn't believe how much mental stress she must've gone through. After all, even though he and Juleka shared a room, there was still a divider for when they needed their privacy, so he wasn't unaware about how personal it was to have one's room recorded without their consent, even if nothing embarrassing got caught on camera.

It seemed cruel to know that Paris' supposedly lucky superhero was perhaps one of the unluckiest people he'd ever known.

Almost on cue, just when the last picture was down and Marinette was debating on what to do with them, her phone went off with a ringtone that sounded very much like danger. Looking over, there was a butterfly symbol flashing on the screen and Marinette's expression faltered at the sight of it.

"Akuma alert," she said flatly, with a pout that would've been cute had he not known what it meant. She hesitated, eyes flicking from him to her phone. "Um... look, I... I have to—"

"Go," he interrupted with a reassuring smile. "I'm not going anywhere, and I'll be here when you're done."

"But—" She frowned and glared at her phone, clearly knowing that she had to leave but not wanting to.

"I mean it, Marinette. It's okay."

She looked at him like she'd never heard those words from anyone else before, eyes vulnerable but fond. She gave him a nod, a brief smile flickering across her face before she turned away and rushed to the stairs. She shouted for her transformation on the way out and Luka watched as her clothes shifted into her ladybug-patterned bodysuit.

When she was completely gone, Luka felt a sudden unsteadiness and leaned against the table for support. It wasn't that he was shocked exactly to hear that Marinette was Ladybug, but he was still overloaded nonetheless.

As his hand rested on the table, he felt the heel of his palm brush something and looked down to see the pile of Adrien pictures next to him. It sent another rush through his body at the reminder that she'd asked him to help her take them down. He was dating her, sure, but he wasn't foolish enough to think that there were no lingering feelings for Adrien. He knew where she stood and he was okay letting her test the waters with him, as she did have feelings for him and who was he to complain if his crush wanted to date him? Besides, he couldn't help wanting to see if maybe it would truly make their bond stronger.

Looking at the wall now, clear of anything but the pink paint, he knew this was real and ended up wishing he'd brought his guitar.

Then, remembering the akuma alert on Marinette's phone, Luka pulled out his own and began to search, eventually finding what she already had: a direct link to watch streams and updates on whatever akuma or sentimonster shenanigans were going on. He knew well enough that he would only give himself anxiety from it, but he wanted to watch his girlfriend in action as a form of support.

Gosh, Ladybug was his girlfriend.

He took a deep breath to steady himself as he watched the footage, his eyes locked to the screen and only shifting when he felt various figures drawing close. He looked up to see that the kwami had all gathered around him, watching the screen closely.

"So..." the pig-looking kwami began, fiddling with their own paws like they knew they were being awkward. "Have you ever wanted to be a hero?"

There was a hiss off to the side, Sass cutting in with, "He already has me."

Luka wasn't feeling up to smile at that, debating with himself before sighing. "Marinette works really hard, and her song is full of sour notes right now," he said. Stepping away and heading for the chaise lounge, he sat down and added, "I hope you can figure out how to rewrite them."

The kwami all exchanged looks, some confused by the metaphor and others who perhaps understood but didn't know how to follow up on it. Luka didn't give them his attention, focusing on the akuma battle playing on his phone.

As he'd expected, it made him a little nervous actually seeing Ladybug in action due to now knowing it was his girlfriend fighting out there. He believed in her abilities and mentally cheered her on, but he just kept remembering all the akuma he'd known about and how stressful it had to have been.

Off to the side, some of the kwami joined forces to help pick up some of the items they'd previously dropped on the floor. It was only after Marinette's room looked as it did before that they properly joined Luka to watch the battle with him.

It was a start.

—————

The battle between Ladybug and the akuma (and Chat Noir was there he supposed) seemed to be getting into its final verse when Luka heard the sound of the trap door being grabbed and clicked open, making him jump. He was only able to whisper a, "Hide," so the kwami could act before Sabine peered inside the room and took a curious look around.

Apparently, they all thought that huddling against his back was a great hiding spot, and he could only smile sheepishly at Sabine while attempting to ignore the weird feeling.

"You're still here?" Sabine asked. "I thought you were going somewhere, and..." She raised a brow, looking around once more. "Where's Marinette?"

"Ah," Luka began, his mind rushing for an excuse, "we actually decided to have our date here instead. Marinette just went up to her balcony to grab something."

It didn't feel good to lie, though he also felt a sense of accomplishment in protecting Marinette's secret. Was this what Marinette dealt with all the time; having to lie to people even if she didn't want to?

Sabine glanced up briefly to where the balcony was, then back to him, slightly confused but rolling with it. "Alright. Do you two need anything?"

"No, ma'am. Thank you though," he replied, hoping it didn't sound forced.

Thankfully, Sabine nodded and left without asking any further questions, the kwami emerging and clinging to Luka while they peered at the now-closed trap door. Luka breathed a sigh of relief, then went back to watching the akuma battle on his phone.

The rest of the fight took a couple minutes, and all that was left to do afterward was wait for Ladybug to return. Once again, Luka wished he had his guitar, making a mental note to get all of his feelings out when he got home, as typical music apps just didn't do anything for him.

An expected "thump" eventually came from the balcony, and the kwami drifting away from Luka as Ladybug descended and landed on her bed. She saw Luka staring at her and initially flinched, but it was clearly a reflex from people seeing her as Ladybug where she shouldn't be, and she hurried down to meet with him afterward. Luka hopped to his feet, not hesitating to meet her halfway and envelop her in a hug, earning a squeak out of her.

"L-luka?"

"Sorry," he murmured. "Just... I got to think about everything you must've gone through without m—" He choked off, suddenly embarrassed, then corrected, "—someone to help you."

She blinked, then giggled and hugged him back. "You're my boyfriend. You're apologizing for hugging me and being worried about sounding selfish?" She nestled her face against his shoulder and he blushed at how warm she was. "Don't. I like it when you're a little selfish, Luka. It grounds me; makes me feel like you're not totally out of my league."

Luka scoffed, nuzzling his head against hers. "You're in a league all your own. I'm literally dating a superhero."

"Trust me, it's not as cool as it sounds."

"I disagree. I think you're really cool."

She blushed profusely. "H-hey..."

He chuckled. "By the way, your mom came to check up on us."

Ladybug gasped, then pulled back, eyes wide and concerned. She was clearly about to apologize, so he cut her off before she could.

"I told her that we were having our date here and that you were getting something from the balcony. Everything's alright."

Her shoulders eased. She let out a sigh of relief as her head fell back against his shoulder. "Thank you."

He hummed contently, resting his hand along her back and keeping it there. Then, realizing when Sabine came up earlier and might do it again, he reminded her, "You're still Ladybug."

"Huh? ...Oh!" she said, though with less panic than normal and unwilling to recoil from the happy spot she was in.

He heard the whisper of her de-transformation phrase and winced as the light engulfed her, slowly turning her back into Marinette. He felt the spandex under his hand turn into fabric and Marinette's breath against his skin as she exhaled.

A kwami that Luka deduced was Marinette's flew a small distance away, eyeing Luka warily and semi-critically. Luka didn't blame her - he wasn't supposed to know - but he also knew that it was far too late to change anything now, and there was no way he was going to abandon Marinette or pretend he knew nothing. He imagined that the kwami knew that too.

"...I'm Tikki," the kwami greeted finally. "It's nice to meet you officially, Luka."

Luka gave her a nod in return, then stiffened somewhat as Marinette squeezed him tighter, burying her face further against him like she truly cherished him.

"It's still a lot," she whispered. "Is it okay if you hug me a little longer?"

"Of course." Though, he paused for a moment before adding, "Would it be more comfortable for you if we move to your chaise?"

"Hm?" She pulled away just enough to look down and realize that they were still awkwardly standing at the bottom of the steps to her bed. "Oh! Yeah, I mean—I didn't even—"

"Hey." He tenderly cupped her cheek, offering a smile. "I didn't complain, did I?"

She looked briefly surprised, making him wonder just how much she'd had to apologize in the past. They slowly made their way over to the chaise lounge, Luka settling down and opening his arms for her so she could settle onto his lap and snuggle against him. He leaned back against the chaise, throwing his legs across the length of it, then wrapped an arm around Marinette to make her feel secure.

"This is nice. It's... um—" She peeked up at him, then grinned shyly. "—melodic? Is that what you'd call it?"

He couldn't stop himself from snorting.

Marinette blushed in embarrassment. "H-hey! I'm trying, okay?"

"I know." He took a strand of her hair in his hand and stroked it. "You always try, and I love that about you."

She let out a series of whines at that, but doesn't protest the compliment either. She nestled against his chest, keeping her face turned away enough to still talk to him without her voice being muffled.

"I just... want to know more about you, Luka," she told him. "You're so sweet and I felt awful having to ditch you. Didn't it bother you?"

He gave a one-armed shrug. "You were busy. I unders—"

"Luka."

He stopped, meeting her firm gaze and knowing that he wasn't getting out of this easily. He sighed, admitting, "...Yeah, it bothered me, but it wasn't because of you or that I didn't trust you. I... see—my dad..." He rubbed the back of his neck, realizing that he'd never told anyone this story before. "I never knew who he was. I asked my mom so many times, but she never gave me an answer. Whenever you had to leave and lie to me, I..."

"Oh." She raised herself up more to meet him closer to eye level. "I'm so sorry—wait—sorry, you told me not to apologize—Sorry! I did it agai—ACK!"

He laughed, feeling warm and delighted by how much she cared about him and wanted him to feel secure in their relationship. He squeezed her shoulder in reassurance, wanting to nuzzle her for how cute she was being and just barely able to hold himself back.

"Don't worry about it. I'm glad you were looking out for me, but you deserve someone to look out for you too."

She pouted a bit at the heartfelt comment, then smiled and raised her hand to settle on his along her shoulder.

He hummed, pausing purposefully for effect before asking, "...So, what does the great guardian Marinette want to do now?"

"Oh my gosh, Luka."

He grinned, happy to compliment her until she was completely red. "How about the brave and heroic Ladybug then?"

"Luka."

He reached up to caress her cheek with his thumb. "But, if you ask me, I like the kind, sincere civilian Marinette best."

"LUKA!"

—————

The rest of their "date" passed by smoothly, Marinette's parents having left them alone so as to not interrupt anything. Marinette had idly brought up the idea that the movie might still be playing - just at a different time than they planned on going - but Luka brushed off the idea and insisted that he was happy there and didn't need to go on a "real" date with her to have fun, opting to leave it up to her.

And... yeah, neither of them were willing to leave their current position and exchange it for having to sit in different seats at a theater with other people around. They opted to just stare at the ceiling and talk, the kwami having respectfully retreated to Marinette's bed to give them privacy.

Talks of their past meetings and when she left to become Ladybug soon turned into a game of finishing Jagged Stone lyrics. Luka, either by being the bigger fan or just having an easier time remembering them, ended up winning in the end, though he couldn't have expected Marinette to follow up by immediately leaving his lap. He'd held back a whine at the sudden lack of warmth and wondered if maybe she'd been teasing him with some sort of punishment by going away.

But then she'd returned with a tiny pink gift box, and inside was a guitar pick necklace signed by Jagged Stone himself.

"He came into the bakery the other day and I had him sign it for you," she explained. Taking it out to fully present it to him, she asked, "Do...do you like it?"

"I love it, Marinette," he replied immediately, reaching out to feel the guitar pick and properly appreciate it. "I can have this?"

She smiled in response, holding the necklace out in a gesture that made his heart skip a beat, realizing that she was offering to put it on him herself. He leaned close, feeling the light brush of her fingers against his neck as she slipped it onto him. He silently hoped that it was durable because he was absolutely never taking it off.

Marinette's hands lingered on the string even when the necklace was fully on, Luka meeting her gaze to see that she was looking at him with all the love he'd ever dreamed of her offering him. He didn't say a word and neither did she, but with a light tug on his necklace, he was pulled towards her into a kiss. It was definitely too deep for their first but also so nice that neither of them cared, and not even the Ladybug revelation could outmatch his surprise at being so readily smooched.

Luka reached for the hand grabbing his necklace, Marinette letting go of it so they could thread their fingers together. His song was going crazy as she leaned forward, clearly wanting more from him and him being wonderfully helpless to resist her. He breathed her in, his other hand finding its place on her side. Her own hand rose up so her fingers could settle against the back of his neck, and he couldn't bring himself to be embarrassed by the sound he made when she started playing with his hair.

She didn't even pull away when their kiss broke, merely pressing her forehead to his while they each caught their breath. Despite the boldness she'd just displayed, she somehow couldn't maintain eye contact and ended up looking elsewhere while all he could do was stare at her in a daze.

"S-sor—" She paused, remembering again that he told her not to apologize. "I-I mean, I'm... not sorry? I—ah—remembered you saying that music is simpler than words, so I just—I thought that maybe I shouldn't ask you with words and just... play it instead?" Luka could feel the heat radiating from her blush as she hurriedly added, "Um... is that okay?"

He answered her with another kiss.

[kojinnie]

Why you should NOT date AOT boys...

Headcanon on what kind of headache you're bound for when dating the AOT boys, and why I advise you NOT to date them! Enjoy, loves!

levi - eren - armin - reiner

part two here | erwin - zeke - jean - connie

— LEVI

He's an incredible man with a lot of talents and he'd be doing real good at his job, that dating him would give you a huge sense of pride. However, this man suffers from being emotionally constipated. He'd always keep you in the fine line of "are we or are we not?", even though you’ve been seeing each other for a long time. He’d never say “I love you” or any type of flashy display of affection. His love language is acts of service and quality time, so if you’re the type to wanting outward reassurance of how someone feels about you, Levi’s not gonna be the person to give you that. 

This problem stems from his deep, unresolved insecurity about the nature of relationship. It’s not just the “Am I good enough?”, he genuinely thinks that he is not a good person, and thus the inherent belief that everybody will abandon him in the end  — something he picks up from his traumatic childhood. He’s wary about establishing relationship because he’s afraid to succumb into his own feelings and vulnerability. He fears at certain point he has to feel and suffer the emotional consequence of being left by someone he cares for. He dreads the idea of getting caught off-guard with being fragile.

You gotta be extremely patient and understanding when it comes to Levi, the reassurance needs to come from you, and frequently too. Bluntly saying, “I’ll stick around” or “I’ll accept your shortcoming” is really soothing for Levi, because although he never shows it, he really thinks he does not deserve you.

— EREN

If you wanna be frustrated in a relationship where you constantly feel like you’re in an endless coaster, then dating Eren gotta be your poison. Sure the honeymoon phase was intoxicating, sure he makes you feel like the prettiest girl in the world. The morning text, the playful neck peck out in the public, the butterflies you feel in your tummy when you catch him staring at you even from afar with those oh so enthralling green eyes. But once the honeymoon phase over, Eren is quick to get bored. Especially if you’re an unproblematic, matter-of-fact type of person. Eren likes to fight, he gets thrilled by it, and he’s high with the rush of adrenaline. He likes it if you’re jealous, if you sulk, if you argue. He likes you to be ‘childish’ because then he gets to be the adult, the savior, the knight in shining armor. It grinds his gears. If you’re unfazed by his antics, if you’re easy to forgive, if you’re chill, Eren will think that you’re not really into him, and will exit the closest door out before his ego gets bruised even further.

Eren is sort of babied by people around him – his parents, his friends, and constantly being compared to his older brother doesn’t help either. He realizes that he got saved a lot of times by a lot of people. And this creates a deeply rooted insecurity with him that turns into an incessant impostor syndrome. The constant thought of not being good enough and the idea that all the achievement he’s ever got was the result of someone else’s help really crush him. You can shower him with praises and reassurance, but he would completely dismiss it, because he thinks your compliments are not based on objective views and that he does not deserve it. He painfully seeks for approval from any authority figure that (he thinks) does not have any emotional connection with him. And it can be really hurtful when he constantly dismisses your sincere compliments while desperately chasing from others who don’t care about him.

— ARMIN

It’s really hard to hate Armin. He’s a really nice man through and through, but what is his strength can also be his deepest weakness. He’s too nice and unsure about a lot of things. He knows he is knowledgeable, but he often doubts himself for being too ‘text-book smart’. Which is a valid cause, because at times he would get very oblivious to how relationship works, and treat feelings like it’s a quantifiable system. It will literally take years for him to finally get down and say how he feels about you, because all these times he was so busy filling the check-list in his mind to convince himself whether you truly like him or not, even though you couldn’t be any clearer with your intention towards him.

He is perceptive with what you think and how you feel, unfortunately this does not materialize into any action as he doubts his own intuition when it comes to his significant other. He fears that his own sentimentality has affected his intuitive judgment and thus deems it invalid, which is completely untrue because every hunch he has about you has always been accurate! That’s just how much he understands and knows you from years of quietly observing and taking each of your word into account.

He really relies on you sitting him down and telling him in details how you feel and the things you expect from him. He will do it, in a flash with no hesitation, but really, he just needs that verbal affirmation that he is doing the things that you want, and it’s not just based on his assumption. So, if you like sweet surprises, impulsive dates and expect your significant other to read your mind, Armin might not be the person.

— REINER

Oh my, truthfully, he is such a sweetheart, and can be completely smitten for the entirety of his life if he has found that one person. However, it’s a treacherous road for both Reiner and you to get to that stage. Initially, when you start to get closer to him, he may seem rigid and uninterested. The first date you had with him probably went awkward and although you really liked him, you were pretty sure he didn’t like you back, until he texted you the morning after, asking for a second date. That’s basically how being with Reiner is, a series of you being sure that he feels nothing towards you, only for his following action to prove the otherwise. He is really awful in displaying his emotion, he tries to be stoic all the time, and it often frustrates you because you cannot really tell how he feels, and you fear that you might have hurt him without realizing.

He may start to open up, only when you open up first about yourself. He thrives in romance with someone who he thinks shares his inner pain, and that’s very important for him, because he is always in a position where everyone expects him to be strong, and to have a significant other that understands his struggle is all he wants. But this gets hard for you, because sometimes Reiner’s sadness can be quite extreme and you cannot match that. Once Reiner realizes that you’re not on the same boat, he may become withdrawn, as he thinks he’s a burden and inadequate for you, and may end up self-sabotaging the whole relationship he has with you.

Although he does not like to admit it, but Reiner often slips into his sadness too deep, that it almost seems like he victimizes himself with his self-hatred. He will be the one to say stupid shit like, “You deserve someone better.” Or “I cannot make you happy.” When in fact you are perfectly willing to be with him all the way through.

With Reiner, you gotta be the bigger person, with bigger gestures and bigger patience. It’s because Reiner needs an anchor and a figure to lean on. In returns he would be the best lover that you will ever have for he is selfless and will be helplessly devoted to you.

Racking my brain writing for the rest of the boys (Erwin, Jean, Connie, Pocko) because they're the ones we SHOULD date.

Update: Thanks thanks thanks for everyone who read this! I received a lot of love and you dunno how much this encourages me to keep going. Anyway, 2 things:

- My Masterlist

- Talk to meeee ♡

[ON-GOING REQUEST EVENT]: Kojinnie's 200 Followers Celebration - 24/7 Writing Event

[multifandomimagines]

Let Me Show You - A Theo Raeken Imagine

Characters: Theo Raeken x Reader

Word Count: 3469

Summary: Reader is feeling stressed and insecure, so Theo wants to be there for her and make her feel perfect.

Warnings: Smut (female-receiving oral and vaginal), insecurity, mentions of IED

Written by: Josie

A/N: Keep reading after the cut 👀

Disclaimer: GIF isn’t ours - credit to who it belongs to

Y/N sighed as the puffy red eyes of her reflection stared back at her through the mirror. This week had been… different. Every little thing had been going wrong, and each day brought more and more emotion, stress and insecurity. Her under-eyes were dark with exhaustion and her smile wasn’t as bright as it usually was - that is, when it showed itself anyway.

She didn’t even hear when her bedroom door opened and closed softly, didn’t register the light footsteps across her carpet moving toward her; not until the eyes of her boyfriend met hers in the mirror, round with concern. Seeing him so suddenly would usually have elicited a wide grin from Y/N, and she would jump into his arms, wrapping her legs around his waist. Yet, in the state she was in, his arrival made her feel as if she could finally let it all out. Her emotions overwhelmed her like a tidal wave, and her eyes prickled with tears.

“Theo,” she whispered, her voice cracking, and hurriedly turned around to bury her head in his neck. Almost like a reflex, Theo held her tightly to his chest as she cried, his hand rubbing up and down her trembling back. He slowly walked them backward until his legs hit the edge of her bed, and pulled her shaking body onto his lap.

“Shh, baby,” Theo hushed her sobs tenderly. “It’s okay.” Her head had made its way back to his neck, Y/N couldn’t even look up at him. He wouldn’t show it, because he had to be strong for her, but seeing his girl like this broke him to pieces inside. She was the only person who saw the good in him when everyone else tossed him aside as either a failure or a villain. Either way, he was a lost cause in the eyes of most people. Everyone really… well, everyone except her. Out of all of the people Theo had met in his life, he knew Y/N deserved to be happy more than anyone. She deserved to be cared for, celebrated, loved. As someone who dragged him out of his darkest places, Theo wanted nothing more than to help her out of hers.

Y/N sniffled, and slowly lifted her head from Theo’s shoulder, her eyes staring downward and avoiding the gaze of her boyfriend. She knew it hurt him to see her like this and she wished she could just… stop.

“Hey,” she heard him say. “Look at me Y/N.” His voice was rich with worry for the girl he loved, and she flinched at the thought of causing him grief. It was quick, but Theo saw it, and his heart snapped once again. Slowly, he raised his hand to her cheek, running his thumb along her cheekbone softly, collecting the tears that were slowly drying on her face. She subtly leaned into his touch without even realising she did it, it was like her body moved off it’s own accord, drawn to him. Gently, Theo moved his hand to Y/N’s chin and turned her head to face him.

For the first time since he’d arrived, Y/N finally let Theo see the pain in her eyes. They were glossy and slightly bloodshot, and Theo’s gaze softened at the sight of her vulnerability. “What’s wrong?” He asked a simply question, not wanting to overwhelm her.

“Everything,” she breathed. Theo’s fingers ran themselves through her hair, encouraging her to keep going. Initially she wanted to shrug him off and succumb to her feelings again, but she let him comfort her. “I’m just feeling everything all at once. Theo, I can’t-“

“It’s okay baby, it’s okay,” He held her cheeks delicately, scared to break her fragile form. “Breathe with me.”

It was something Theo had learned over the months. Sometimes Y/N really needed to calm down and just breathe slowly, in and out, exhaling the intensity of her feelings as much as her brain would allow. Though she hadn’t admitted it, Y/N realised that the method worked better when Theo led her through it.

After a minute or so of long, deep breaths, Y/N was no longer jolting with the ghosts of sobs from earlier. Theo continued to hold her close, remaining gentle but tight enough to always remind her that he was there for her. No matter what.

“This week has been so bad,” She began, and Theo stayed silent, realising that she was finally feeling comfortable enough to talk. He felt a small surge of pride flow through him at this, knowing that it was hard for her at times. “I’m stressed. I still have so much work to do, and deadlines are creeping up on me like a freakin’ predator. I’m worried for my brother, he’s struggling with his IED and he’s even been taking his meds, but they keep needing to up the dose and it kills me to see him in the state he gets. I keep screwing up too, like earlier I kept stalling the car, and I broke a photo frame yesterday morning, and I forgot to submit an assignment for grading at the beginning of the week. And I can’t sleep at night… Theo, I’m so tired.”

“Hey, come here,” Theo whispered, pulling her into another hug. “Okay, first of all, you are so smart and every time you get stressed about an assessment, you always go and smash it, don’t you?”

A smile threatened to pull at her lips at his confidence in her, and she nodded.

“Right,” Theo grinned. “Next thing, Liam is resilient, just like you. He won’t let one little setback get him down, and his meds will be sorted before you know it. Plus, he’s lucky to have you as a sister, you know that? You’re always there for him, everyone sees it.”

Y/N shifted on Theo’s lap, looking into his eyes as he spoke. “And,” He continued. “Everyone has weeks where they feel like they mess everything up, even super cool badasses like me.” Y/N giggled, spurring Theo on. “Someone as perfect as you doesn’t need to worry about a few little mistakes. They’re nothing, okay? Not important.” His hand moved soothingly up and down her arm, leaving goosebumps in their wake. “Is that everything?”

“Um, yeah…” Y/N trailed off quietly, suddenly avoiding her boyfriend’s eyes and sinking into herself. Theo knew her so well at this point that not a single subtle movement would go unnoticed, so he raised his eyebrows at her response. He knew she was holding back, and she knew that he knew. Sighing, Y/N gave in a little. “It’s stupid.”

“What have I always told you?” He said, smiling at her. “You can tell me anything. Anything at all. I’ll be there for you no matter what. You know that, don’t you?”

Y/N nodded and breathed in, slightly shakily. “I feel ugly, Theo.”

“What?” Theo whispered in disbelief, his eyes the size of saucers. He didn’t know what he’d expected, but it wasn’t that. “Baby-“

“I told you it was stupid-“

“No, it’s not that, it’s just-“ Theo searched for the words in his brain. He never thought he’d have to convince the most beautiful girl in the world that that’s what she was. He thought it was just common knowledge, really. “You and ‘ugly’ would never even fit in the same category. Not even in the same universe.”

“That’s just not true though,” Y/N stated, shaking her head, her eyes tired. “I can’t even look in the mirror at the moment. I feel like when I look, I’m not looking back at me. And it makes me cry. I’d rather not see myself at all than to look at that reflection.”

If Theo’s heart wasn’t broken before, the damage was definitely done now. Hearing Y/N, his girl, say that she wasn’t pretty, but ugly, made him feel all kinds of lost and confused, but more so sad, because he wished he could take away her pain and make it all disappear. Unfortunately, his powers of pain transference only worked on physical pain, and he silently cursed that fact.

“How can you not see what I see…” He whispered, almost more to himself than to her. “You know, the first time I saw you Y/N, even from a distance I knew I’d never see anyone as beautiful as you. And now I’m looking at you, months later, and I still think you’re just as stunning. You are gorgeous. You hear me? The most gorgeous ever.” Theo placed kisses on her nose, her cheeks, her forehead as he spoke, causing Y/N’s heart to flutter. His words stirred something in her, and the intensity of his eyes boring into hers made her forget about everything she was worried about. A wave of adoration for her boyfriend washed over her, and she cupped his cheeks delicately, a smile pulling at the corners of his lips.

Y/N didn’t have the words at that moment, all the emotion was caught in her throat, so she did what she felt conveyed her feelings best. She leaned forward and kissed him, Theo’s lips moving against hers immediately, as if by instinct. It was so soft, so pure, light as a feather. She pulled away from him all too soon, their eyes meeting each other once again, but Theo didn’t feel like stopping. “I want to show you how beautiful you really are,” He spoke lowly, holding her hand and giving a gentle squeeze. “Please baby. Let me show you.”

He didn’t have to explicitly say what he really meant by that for both of them to know, and his request sent warm shivers through her body. She spoke only one word: “Okay.”

Theo connected their lips again, harder this time. Even with just a kiss, he wanted to pour every ounce of love he had for her in it. He would make sure that he made her feel exactly how she deserves to feel. Her hands had moved to the back of his neck, plucking at the hairs on his head, while Theo held her as close as their bodies would allow.

His fingers slid up her t-shirt slightly, brushing the skin underneath. Theo’s fingers were so cold that Y/N gasped against his lips, so her boyfriend took the chance to slip his tongue into her mouth and explore. Slowly, he lifted her shirt up further and further until they were forced to pull away so Theo could tug it over her head and toss it on her bedroom floor.

Of course, Theo wanted to marvel her brilliance as best he could, so he gripped her by the waist and moved her carefully so she was laying flat on her bed, looking up at him. “So beautiful,” he murmured, and waisted no time in resuming their kiss. His hands travelled down her sides as their lips moved in sync like a perfectly choreographed dance, and his hips ground into hers - gently still, yet hard enough to give Y/N friction where she needed it the most.

He dragged his lips to her neck, sucking and biting on the skin to create dark marks to decorate her already perfect body. Theo considered it his finishing touch to her, as he knew she needed him as much as he needed her, which was what made them so perfect. Y/N’s hands roamed his back, one leg secured over his hip to keep him close, and Theo reached around to unclip her bra. His eyes widened - he would never get used to seeing her body like this, and she wasn’t even fully exposed to him yet.

“I love these so much,” He said, lowering his head to one breast and closing his mouth over her nipple, his tongue sliding across her sensitive skin. Y/N moaned as he simultaneously kneaded her other breast with his hand. “I love this one,” He said, moving away from the one he was playing with. “And I love this one.” Theo reattached his lips to her other breast, her rapidly increasing breaths spurring him on.

Y/N’s hips involuntarily bucked up at Theo’s, and he chuckled lightly against her skin at the movement. He trailed his lips back up to her collarbone, her neck, her jaw, all while dragging her leggings and her panties down her legs as far as he could. He pulled away from Y/N’s lips to crawl down the bed until he could completely reveal her entire body. Her leggings and panties discarded on the floor, Theo looked his girl in the eyes as he placed his hands on her thighs and lightly encouraged her legs apart.

Shivering with anticipation, Y/N watched her boyfriend wide-eyed as he licked one long stripe up her centre. Her eyelids fluttered, but she couldn’t bring herself to break the intense eye contact she held with Theo, until he began to flick his tongue against her clit. Her head fell back onto her pillow, arms flying down to grab onto Theo’s hair, feeling his head moving between her legs. She moaned as he licked and sucked at her clit, doing everything in his power to make her feel good, and it was music to his ears. He soon replaced his tongue with his fingers, rubbing her clit quickly, and started licking along her core, like it was his whole life’s purpose to do so.

“Fuck, Theo,” She whimpered, and Theo groaned against her at the sound of her saying his name in such a situation. Her voice held so much vulnerability yet so much excitement, so much feeling, so much love. The vibrations against her core sent waves of pleasure racing through her, and Theo watched through his eyelashes as her back arched off the bed.

Theo removed his mouth from her core, and her head whipped up briefly at the loss of contact, her eyes wide and pleading for something, anything. Barely moment after, Theo pushed two fingers inside her, pumping them at a quick pace. Y/N moaned louder, and Theo pulled himself up so his head was level with hers, staring directly into her eyes as his fingers worked their magic. “How good does this feel Princess?”

“So good,” Y/N breathed, barely being able to find it in herself to speak. She gripped onto his biceps as he continued his work between her legs, moaning with every thrust of his fingers. “It feels amazing.”

Theo smirked slightly, content that he was getting exactly the reaction from her that he set out to get, and leaned down to capture her lips with his once again. He added another finger and picked up the pace of his actions, his mouth drowning her voice as she cried out. He kissed her hard, drawing the breath out of her almost completely, and she could taste herself on his tongue which only brought her closer to the edge.

Feeling her walls clench around his fingers, Theo moved his lips around to her ear. “Are you gonna cum?” He said, his voice rough with his own arousal. He knew the answer, but he also knew that Y/N loved to hear his voice, and it somehow turned her on even more. All she could do at this point was nod frantically, her moans and whimpers making it impossible to get the words out. Theo sped up his actions even further, trying with everything he had to send her over the edge. “Cum for me baby.”

The words uttered into her ear sent her into ecstasy, and she let go screaming Theo’s name. He watched with his mouth hung open as her body pulsed and jolted as her orgasm washed over her in waves, her cries slowing into whimpers and her contorted face relaxing into one of sheer bliss.

A few moments later when Y/N had caught her breath, she reached down and palmed Theo’s bulge through his joggers, eyes widening when she realised how hard he already was. He groaned, dropping his head to her shoulder and tensing at her touch. “N- no, baby,” He stuttered out, voice rough from the feeling. Y/N was confused as he slowly moved her hand away, tilting her head to the side in a silent question. “Tonight is about you.”

Usually she would protest and say that they both need to be pleasured equally, but she wanted him so badly that she didn’t have it in her to argue. Frantically, she yanked his head down and smashed her lips against his, tongue and teeth clashing in desperation. All she wanted was him, and she didn’t want to wait any longer.

She pulled his shirt up his body, almost ripping the fabric with her speed, and he pulled away so she could pull it over his head. She loved to admire Theo’s toned chest and stomach, so she reached her hand down to feel up his abs. She tried to look, but Theo was adamant on her being the one who was worshipped, so he dipped his head and began sucking on her neck once again, causing her head to fall back and a moan to fall from her lips.

As he painted her neck with purple bruises, Y/N reached down and played with the waistband of his joggers, fiddling with the drawstrings. Theo felt her fingers brush him and growled against her neck, hurriedly standing up to yank them and his boxers to the ground, completely exposed before her.

Y/N whimpered at the sight of him, naked and ready for her, and he crawled back over her just as quickly as he’d stood up. Theo looked at her with dark eyes, wordlessly asking for permission to treat her to just what she deserved. “Please, Theo,” She whispered, and of course, Theo didn’t want to deny her anything she wanted, especially when she asked so nicely.

The two of them moaned in harmony, jaws dropped open, as Theo pushed himself inside her, easily sliding in due to her wetness. He moved all the way in until he felt like he was inside Y/N’s stomach, pausing there as they both breathed heavily from the sensation. “Feeling better?” Theo spoke thinly, smiling at his girlfriend’s expression of pure pleasure.

“Miles better,” She replied, thrusting her hips up at Theo, making it known that she wanted more. The chimera began to move, pushing in and out of her at an ever-increasing pace, making sure she felt every single inch of him to give her the best sex possible. Y/N hands roamed his back, nails scratching at it and breaking the skin as she moaned and cursed into his ear.

“Always so tight and wet for me,” Theo groaned, his hair falling messily over his forehead as he moved. “So perfect. Every inch of you is perfect.” He sped up his movements, making sure to hit the spot that gets her screaming, and grabbed at her breast with one hand and delicately stroking her cheek with the other. “I love you.”

Theo was going so deep and fast now, Y/N was so close. Her nails dug into his back as her release approached, unable to tear her eyes away from his as they glowed yellow from the adrenaline. “I love you too,” She spoke shakily, so nearly there, when Theo kissed her hard, knowing she was reaching her orgasm from her clenching walls.

“Now,” He spoke against her lips, and as soon as the word had left his lips, Y/N screamed out Theo’s name at the most euphoric feeling she had ever experienced, shaking and quivering around him. Moments later, as she was still feeling the high, she felt Theo slow his movements as he spilled into her, his own release washing through him like a tidal wave.

After coming down from their high, Theo flopped down next to her in bed, immediately pulling her close to rest her head on his chest, which was still rising and falling. He kissed her head lightly, stroking her hair affectionately, and then pulled the covers over their bodies. He knew Y/N was exhausted, not just from their activities but from her whole week. Her breathing had slowed and he realised she had already fallen into a relaxed slumber.

Theo smiled to himself - seeing his girl finally calm with no stress lines pulling at her face made his heart soar. He hated seeing her so upset, in fact it was his least favourite thing to see in the world, so he vowed to always be the one to lift her back up again.

Theo would always be there for her: rain or shine, any day, any time. And one day it’ll be ‘til death do them part. His smile lingered on his lips as he let his own eyelids closed and he joined her in her slumber, meeting her in her dream.

[blu-joons]

Broken Heels ~ Kim Namjoon

The distance continued to grow between the two of you as you walked home from the event that you had attended that evening. With every step that you took, Namjoon could tell that you were struggling more and more with the heels that had tormented you all night long.

“I’m fine,” you tried to assure him as he looked questionably across at you. You were stubborn and convinced that you could get home in your shoes without letting the pain that you were feeling get in the way of you walking.

However, Namjoon could see right through you, as he had done all evening. Every time he turned to look at you, he watched you stumble to the side or reach out for something to balance you preventing yourself from toppling to the ground in a heap.

“We don’t have to walk home if you’re hurting,” he tried to remind you, stopping so that you could catch up with him, “those heels are killing you on the inside.”

“The heels are perfectly fine otherwise I wouldn’t have worn them this evening,” you protested.

You picked up your pace to try and catch up with Namjoon, however as you did, you felt yourself shake to the left once again. Namjoon stepped forward and grabbed onto you, watching as you tried to steady your feet, only for your ankle to roll to the side again.

Straight away you knew that you were in trouble as you looked down to see the heel had fallen off the sole of your shoe, a crack that had threatened to break all night long.

“This is all I needed to finish my night off,” you vented, glancing helplessly across at Namjoon as at last the inevitable seemed to happen for you, having been threatening for some time.

His head shook as he knelt down, unfastening the strap of both of your heels, “we might as well bin these, they’re no good to you now to get you home.”

“How else am I supposed to get home then?”

“We’ll find a way,” he assured you, “I don’t even know why you wore these things tonight anyway.”

“There’s a standard,” you spoke, bringing Namjoon’s eyes up to look at you as his eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “There’s always an expectation on me to dress a certain way when I’m with you, I’ve got to look the part, haven’t I?”

Namjoon’s head shook as he carefully slipped your feet out of your heels, placing them gently down onto the cold concrete of the pavement being wary not to cause too much pain for you.

His heart sunk as he realised what you meant, struggling to believe that you felt such a way. Namjoon knew that you felt the pressure dating him, but he never imagined that you would put yourself through so much just to play the part that you felt you needed to fulfil.

“I can’t believe you’d wear heels for the sake of other people,” he whispered, “you should wear what you’re comfortable in, that’s all that I ever want for you Y/N.”

“I don’t need people talking about me,” you admitted as Namjoon stood back up properly by your side, “it’s better to just do the right thing, even if it does kill my feet all night long.”

His head shook as he stepped forwards, pressing a kiss to your forehead, “people don’t talk about you, anyone who wants to talk about you won’t get very far when I’m around.”

Your head nodded as Namjoon searched for your eyes, using the reflection of the streetlights to study your expression closely. “I don’t want to make myself vulnerable Namjoon, I don’t want to give them a reason to get to me.”

“No one will, I’ll make you feel safe, always, and keep you safe too.”

The pain in your voice killed Namjoon on the inside, he had no idea how long you’d felt such a way without telling him. He couldn’t begin to imagine how scared you were for every single event that you went to with him, terrified that you wouldn’t fit the bill.

“I don’t want you to suffer, I want you to feel protected by my side. You should have told me what was going on, you shouldn’t have struggled all night long by yourself Y/N.”

“It’s not just been tonight Namjoon.”

“I know,” he sympathised, “and I hate that it’s been going on for so long. You’ve been falling all over the place and all because you’re scared. What did you think would happen if you opened up to me, did you think I’d make you wear your heels?”

Your head shook back at him, “I just didn’t want you to feel let down, every woman at that event wore heels, it’s like I would have been the odd one out.”

“You would have been comfortable, and that’s the main thing,” he smiled.

Namjoon kept you in position before standing himself in front of you, bending down. You watched on in confusion as he tapped against his back, encouraging you to leap on so that he could carry you safely the rest of the way home.

A laugh came from you as soon as you realised what was going on, “are you really sure you can carry me on your back Namjoon.”

“Of course,” he assured, catching your legs as soon as you jumped on, shaking you gently so that you were positioned comfortably against his back. “It’s the least I can do for you.”

“You don’t need to do anything for me, I really am alright, my ankles already feel better.”

Namjoon knew you meant well, but his head shook, “you’ve suffered in silence because of me, I failed to see what was going on, and I failed to take care of you too.”

Whenever it came to you, Namjoon always blamed himself, even if it wasn’t always his fault entirely. There was no way that he could blame you for wearing your heels and hurting all night long, he just wished now that he could ease the pressure that was in the back of your mind.

“I love you,” he suddenly whispered as he began walking along the path, “and from now on, I want you to promise me that comfort will always be the thing you worry about the most when putting together an outfit.”

“I promise,” you grinned, stretching around his shoulder so that you could press a kiss against his cheek, “and I love you too by the way.”

A gentle blush crept onto Namjoon’s face as he bounced along the pavement with a spring in his step. It had been a long time since the two of you had messed around, carrying yourselves as if you were kids once again.

“Do you reckon you’ll still love me once you’ve carried me all the way home?” You teased, “your back will be in pieces tomorrow morning.”

“I’ll be fine,” Namjoon confidently replied, “and if I’m not, I can join you in the land of injuries, your ankles are going to take a few days to get better after tonight.”

Reluctantly, your head nodded in agreement with him, “I don’t regret wearing the heels, it felt like the right thing to do, at the time at least.”

“I just hope you’ve realised that you don’t need heels for me,” Namjoon smiled, “especially broken ones.”

“Definitely, it’s flats all the way for me from now on.”

---

Masterlist

[aetherarf]

So as my first request, if possible and you feel comfortable, I would like to ask for something with diluc, kaeya ​​and childe with a fem reader who had an abusive father. I don't care how he was abusive, you can choose which one favors you best. And with that, I would like to know how the characters would react by discovering this or how they would deal with the traumas and the reader's fear. Anyways, whatever you think is best 💓

Hello! Also I think I'll go with somewhat different one's each time... ( Diluc gets the short end of the stick again ). Also... I will admit, unless I tackle gender-based topics, I write men and women Readers the same...? You can easily read it as GN but I'll probably just default to GN terms since men and women both suffer from abuse and Gender is a complicated thing that doesn't fit into these writings. [Sorry if I disappoint!]

Edit: forgot to put a summary oopsie

[[ WARNING: ANGST, ABUSE MENTION, RAPE MENTION ]]

[[ Summary: You loved him, you loved him with your whole heart... but no matter your love, you had to eventually tell him what broke you, and caused you to act this way

Total Word Count: 1'880

Childe Word Count: 544

Diluc Word Count: 734

Kaeya Word Count: 602 ]]

Childe

Childe considered himself a pretty affectionate guy--He liked innocent wrestling, tickle-fights, and if he had his way, he'd have his hand on you every second of the day, on your hip, around your shoulders, holding your hand, or even just having your pinkies intertwined was enough.

However, you flinched. Every time he ever tried to make a motion towards you, you flinched, and i you didn't flinch, your eyes widened in shock.

You would apologize, and he tried to dismiss it, It's okay, you didn't do anything. I'm sorry for scaring you.

And he left it at that. But, you were sitting next to him, and he yawned, trying to casually wrap an arm around you, but as soon as he touched your shoulders, you yelped, flinching and staring at his offending arm in shock... and then, slowly, you took deep breaths.

"I'm sorry," you said, exhausted, "I didn't mean to jump."

Childe put his hand on his lap... and he frowned.

"You didn't do anything wrong... but... can I ask... why you flinch from me?" He asked, tilting his head to the side a little, "Normally, that wouldn't be an issue, but... I guess after seeing it so much, I wonder if I've been hurting you on accident, or... if you just don't trust me. I don't like... feeling bad all the time."

You shook your head, grabbing his hand--you were always better when you initiated it, rather than him, "You-Of course not. You've never hurt me, you're always good... it's just..."

Childe looked at you, expectantly, "Just...?"

"... I-I got hit a lot, in the past. I... don't think I've gotten over it. But-you didn't do anything, it was just... him."

Childe's face... darkened. His eyes--they seemed almost empty as he stared for a moment, his hand slowly shifting to grab yours, firm but gentle.

"Who hit you...?" He asked, completely serious... dark.

"It-Childe, you're scaring me."

He blinked once-twice, and that horrific expression disappeared, back to his sweet, charming, slightly-dumb self.

"I'm sorry, snowbird. But-Who hurt you? What happened?"

You hesitated... you'd have to tell him eventually, and there would never be a more perfect time than this.

"My-my father. He... He was a very angry individual. Any slight irritation, and..."

Childe, slowly, lifted your hand to his mouth to press a gentle kiss upon the back.

"You don't have to keep talking if it's too hard," he said, with a smile, "I get it... But-It must be hard to live like that, right?"

You nodded, "It's... awful," you admitted, "I hate it. I don't like feeling scared of you... Even if... No, wait..."

"I get it," he reassured, even if he didn't hide his pained expression well. "I'm a Harbinger... I can get you the best consoling and therapy that money can buy... I can't help you, i mean, talking me me won't help that much, but... Would you do that for me? I can set it all up, I promise... I just need you to go."

You stared.

"Will you go with me, the first time?"

He hesitated.

"Well, I probably won't talk much, since I want it to be about you, but... I'll go. I'll make sure no one as much as lays a hand on you ever again."

Diluc

You and Diluc got along well. You both enjoyed cuddling, but sometimes you slept back-to-back, not from any sort of lack of intimacy, but you just didn't want to cuddle.

You liked to cook together, Diluc oftentimes taking the lead. When he was alone, in the safety of your home, he was quite soft spoken, never raising his voice, and he was gentle whenever he touched you--He truly was a gentleman to his core.

But as you both lie in bed, Diluc reading a book as he furiously squinted at it, you reminded of his worsening vision, you sighed softly.

"Diluc," you said, and he lifted his head, surprised, before he looked down at you. He didn't say anything, just waiting for you to speak.

"... Are you disappointed? With me? With us?" You asked, months and months of fear finally coming out--you couldn't even be upset, or sob, or fuss, you just felt tired.

"What?" He asked, staring at you for a moment. "No. I'm happy. Are you... Disappointed?" He asked, his voice barely a whisper, barely able to hold in his fear.

You pushed yourself up, "No, no, I just... You know what people do when they're together."

Diluc stared at you blankly, waiting a response. After a few second too long, "Oh," he said, "... Do you think I don't love you?" He asked,

"No, no, I meant-sex. I just... We've never done it. Are you... Disappointed?" You asked. He shook his head,

"No. I have you, I don't need sex."

You were quiet for a moment.

"You don't want to... Have sex with me?" You asked--you didn't know whether to be pleased, to know he loved you so dearly that he didn't care for that, or to be insulted.

"I..." He took a deep breath, "I don't want to have sex with anyone or anything, really. If you wanted to, I could... Come to terms with the idea. It's not you, I just... Sex doesn't... Appeal."

You sighed... Were you relieved? You still felt an agonizing pain in your chest. "I get it--and... I guess not, I'm happy with us." You said, smiling as you looked over his face... He, however wasn't smiling.

"You're lying," he said, stating it so plainly that it sounded like a fact, "You brought this up because it was upsetting you."

While lying, you put your arm over your eyes... focusing on breathing, as to not sound choked up--strained.

"I just... I don't know. I was-I was scared you'd ask."

He set everything off to the side, and instead laid down beside you, gathering you up in his arms as he held you close--his hand gently running up and down your back.

"Are you afraid of sex?" He asked... "... If it makes you feel better, I am too."

You looked up at him, staring for a moment.

"I... I was raped," you said, without realizing, "By... my father. He-He was... drunk. It happened... more than once. I don't think he ever remembered, he was-he was so good to me when he was sober, but..."

You hid into his chest, hiding from the world.

"I'm scared," you whined, softly, "I'm tired of waiting for it to happen... with you."

Diluc pressed a kiss atop your head, "... I would never do that, and I don't drink." There was a long moment of silence, "... You have told me about your pain, and... I believe it's only right I tell you of mine. I... Have a similar story," his voice was shaking, as he was struggling to even think... or to talk.

"It was not by my father, he was a good man... But-I... had a friend. Someone I... once cared for. I was drugged, and..."

He swallowed thickly.

"I was aware. I could feel everything, but I could not control my body. I... I understand why you are afraid. I think, I'm afraid too."

You held him close.

"I don't want us to be afraid anymore."

You could only nod at that, closing your eyes as he held you--But, somehow, despite all this fear, you felt so safe in his arms.

"Do you think... we should talk to someone? A professional?" He asked, "I... I never told anyone, but... It... Might be good. For both of us."

"I think so, too." You pressed a kiss over his heart, "Can we go to bed, though, like this?"

"Of course, my blossom."

Kaeya

Kaeya considered himself pretty keen--He noticed how you would, oftentimes, try to desperately explain and justify doing anything. You were minding your own business, reading? You'd try and justify it, "I just... had a hard day. It's not anything bad, I promise."

And he's usually reply with that signature smile, "You could be reading porn and I wouldn't mind, you know."

You laughed it off, but there was an edge of fear in your voice.

Fear.

You were always afraid, and he wanted to fix that. So, he took a day off, just to prepare everything. Some nice candles, a good dinner, some fine wine... And when you came home, he hugged you, held you delicately like you were made of glass. You had a lovely dinner together, with sweet smiles and gentle kisses...

Until the two of you sat together, and Kaeya, lightly, rested his hand on your leg.

"I... Figure you're in a decently-good mood, right?"

You were, it was nice... but you were terrified about what he was going to ask.

"I wanted to you about something... why are you so... scared around me? I don't mind what you do, you can read what you want and do what you want, you don't need my approval for anything... except maybe sleeping with others, but..." He sighed, "Did I do something wrong? Did I hurt you?" He grabbed your hand, holding it with both of his own, "I want to make this right, I don't want you to be afraid of me."

...

How could you respond?

"I'm not afraid of you, I'm... just afraid. Old habits die hard, I guess," you laugh, but it's broken and forced--Kaeya does not laugh.

"Why?" He asked, voice low, "Are... is something threatening you? Blackmailing you? If you just tell me, I can fix it. I have my ways."

"No, it's... not blackmail." You tried to think of how to word it.

"If I may guess," he said, "Has someone... hurt you in the past?"

As you looked at him, eyes wide and vulnerable... he knew he hit the nail in the head.

Suddenly, you poured it all out.

How, everytime you did anything, even just looked at someone for too long, how he would yell at you, punish you for anything you did. Reading a book for your studies, he would threaten to burn it, you desperately having to convince him of its innocuous nature, hiding anything you wanted to keep safe.

How he'd scream for hours at a time, until his voice was hoarse and you were terrified he'd make good on his promises that you'd die by his hand.

As you spoke, Kaeya had only stopped looking at you for a single moment, to grab a box of tissues to set upon your lap, "Go on," he said, when you hesitated.

And, now you leaned against his shoulder, slumping... weak and exhausted. He, slowly, wrapped his arms around you, letting your head fall to his chest as he squeezed you close.

"I... I'm sorry. I truly am sorry, love,"

For a moment, he was quiet.

"I don't know how to help, but... I know someone you can talk to. Help you... Get through it. Therapy."

You lifted your head, looking at him with glassy eyes.

"Will you come with me?"

He hesitated.

"He's safe... But I'll go with you a few times until you can trust them, okay?"

You, weakly, nodded. "Okay."

"For now... Do you want to go to bed?"

Weakly, you smiled, "Only if you keep me safe from my nightmares."

Kaeya smiled back-"I'll do the best I can."

[vhenanshiral]

On the Topic of Seiya Kou.

This is a Sailor Moon post rather than a Dragon Age post. Shocker, I know, but Sailor Moon is another one of my loves. This will focus on the 90s anime adaptation of the manga. So do not come at me with “but in the manga,” because the 90s adaptation and the manga were incredibly different in multiple ways. Seiya will be referred to as she/her because the male form was a disguise. That being said, any interpretation of Seiya’s gender is valid and I love them all! Anyway. I see a lot of shit talking about Seiya and it’s honestly ... super tiring. So many of the “negative” points against Seiya are misinterpreted, misunderstood, and misrepresented for the sake of making her look like a dumpster fire. 1. “Seiya is creepy towards Usagi and stalks her.” Except ... she doesn’t. They meet by accident numerous times, and in fact Usagi even seeks Seiya out. They develop a friendship, and it’s normal and natural for friends to seek each other out. Usagi and the girls actually, literally stalk the Three Lights more than once during the season. 2. “Seiya thinks Usagi is weak because she told Mamoru to take care of her when they left.” This honestly makes no sense to me. It is repeatedly shown that Seiya admires Usagi’s strength, both as Usagi and as Sailor Moon. It is natural to want the people you love to be protected, and that does not mean that you think they’re weak and incapable of protecting themselves. Seiya knew Usagi was capable and strong because she had seen her demonstrate these traits multiple times. Throughout the season, Seiya repeatedly lifts Usagi up with her confidence in her capabilities. This is even before she knows she is Sailor Moon. Let’s not forget that when Galaxia kills all of the Inners, they ask the Starlights to protect Sailor Moon, so saying that Seiya telling Mamoru to take care of her means she thinks she is weak ... that must mean everyone else thinks she is too, right? It’s absurd. 3. “Seiya can’t take ‘no’ for an answer, always hits on her, and is constantly pressuring her into a relationship.” It is true that Seiya repeatedly quips about “having a chance” with Usagi. It’s also true that Usagi repeatedly reminds Seiya that she has a boyfriend. But it isn’t true that Seiya repeatedly attempts to coerce her into a relationship. It also isn’t true that she does it all the time. While she shouldn’t have done it even more than once (when she was unaware of Usagi’s relationship status,) it’s obvious from the context that she isn’t being serious. Seiya repeatedly making quips is an issue, and while those kinds of situations can and often do mean someone is being a “Nice Guy,” a predator, an abuser, etc., we know from everything that we see that it is not the case with Seiya. Let’s take the “date,” for an example: Seiya throws it out there (literally, just time and place and walks off) and Usagi willingly shows up the next day and is even irritated that Seiya is late. Usagi is not forced or coerced into the date; she retains all of the power regarding whether or not she shows up. She would not have gone if she didn’t want to. Actually, let’s look at these instances of Seiya hitting/making a move on Usagi. - In the “date” episode, Usagi thinks that Seiya is going to make a move on her. Some suggest that Usagi thinks she is going to kiss her, but the language, Usagi’s expressions, and her reaction to the truth seem to imply that she thinks Seiya is suggesting something more intimate. - In the episode with the beach monster when Chibi Chibi opens up the door and pushes Seiya over on to Usagi, Usagi is the one who, again, assumes Seiya is up to No Good, despite it being a complete accident and innocent on Seiya’s part. - In the episode where Seiya spends the night at Usagi’s because she’s alone and Seiya very nearly confesses who she is to Usagi while they’re in her bedroom, it is Usagi who believes that Seiya is going to confess to having a crush on her. - Later in that same episode, when they are hiding in the cabinet and Seiya again thinks about confessing her true identity to her, it is Usagi who thinks Seiya is about to suggest something intimate. In fact, throughout the season, it is everyone from Usagi, to the other girls, to single-episode characters, to even Luna who think that Seiya is going to suggest or attempt illicit activities with Usagi, and not Seiya. It is all but explicitly stated that Usagi is attracted to Seiya. Not just because of the implications of her assumptions, but also because she is scolded over it. In fact, Rei tells her that she needs to sort her feelings out. Haruka and Michiru forbid her from seeing Seiya because she has Mamoru. She may not love Seiya the same way, but she is attracted to her and she does love her (and Usagi being attracted to other people is not a new thing.) Let’s look at the softball episode, because it’s ... pretty problematic and people often point to it as being one of the episodes that paint Seiya as some creepy stalker who can’t just take a hint and tells everyone that Usagi is her girlfriend. It is Rei who thinks that Seiya training Usagi in softball is inappropriate (let’s remember that it is Ami who thinks that something illicit is going on with Seiya and Usagi in the bodyguard episode...) because Mamoru is Usagi’s boyfriend, not Seiya. It is Sonoko who insists that Seiya’s “relationship” with Usagi isn’t acceptable, and it is her that places the bet that if Seiya’s team loses, she’s not to associate with Usagi anymore. Seiya agrees because she’s competitive, hates to lose, has confidence in herself and Usagi, and knows that Sonoko is wrong. When Usagi tries to interject about the actual nature of their relationship (that they’re not dating,) it’s the girls who shush her because they’re expecting Seiya’s team to lose and that will give them the opportunity to make Seiya feel better. I want to touch on the “Seiya knows Sonoko is wrong” part. I think what a lot of people don’t think about is that when Sonoko placed this bet and openly stated her disapproval of Seiya spending time with Usagi, Sonoko was attacking Usagi’s worth as a person. She was openly saying that Usagi wasn’t good enough to be hanging out with Seiya in any capacity. Seiya took issue with this because she obviously believes and knows differently. She values Usagi as a person. Who is Sonoko to decide who is and isn’t good enough to spend time with her? Seiya is not approaching the situation with entirely selfish motives, unlike the girls who fed into the Seiya/Usagi romance for the hopeful eventuality of them being able to comfort Seiya after a loss when she’ll be forced to stop hanging out with Usagi. She uses this situation to help bolster Usagi’s confidence in herself. That doesn’t change the fact that the bet is stupid to begin with, but it is what it is. Oh, additionally ... Seiya doesn’t tell the school that she and Usagi are dating. Them dating is an assumption that Seiya simply doesn’t correct. It’s worth noting that if she did correct that assumption, it would feed into Sonoko’s declaration that Usagi isn’t good enough to be with Seiya. 4. “Seiya tried to make the rooftop scene about herself and used it as a way to try to take Mamoru’s place in Usagi’s life.” This whole entire scene is consistently misinterpreted and has all of the context ripped from it, because that is not what that scene is. No, it 100% was not the best time for Seiya to ask that question (and no, it is not “can I take his place?” that she says,) but people tend to forget that Usagi is not the only vulnerable person in this scene and it isn’t just about her. It is Seiya who triggers Usagi’s emotional breakdown on accident, and in these moments she is watching the person she loves crumble into pieces. The rooftop scene is about both of them and the context makes that clear. Up until this point, the only person who knew that Mamoru wasn’t keeping in contact with Usagi was Seiya. None of the girls knew, none of them. Imagine the amount of trust Usagi had to have in Seiya in order to share that incredibly sensitive information with her and with no one else, not even her closest friends. Usagi had told Seiya a whole 13 episodes before this one, and since finding out Seiya tried her best to make Usagi happy and to keep her mind busy. It isn’t until a few episodes after this that everyone including Seiya finds out that Mamoru is dead. So Seiya spends all of this time believing that Mamoru ditched Usagi when he moved overseas and that he’s a horrible boyfriend who obviously doesn’t care about Usagi. This is naturally hurtful to Seiya, who grows to genuinely like and love Usagi through the season. She cares for her and doesn’t want to see her in pain, which is why she does her best to help Usagi feel less alone. There is no point in the season where Seiya’s intentions are to maliciously shove herself into Mamoru’s place in Usagi’s life. She has no idea who Tuxedo Mask is. She had no idea that throwing the red rose - her own personal trademark - was going to trigger such an emotional response from Usagi. So here they both are on this rooftop in the middle of the pouring rain. Usagi’s breaking down over how alone she feels, and Seiya’s suddenly faced with the realization that not only did she cause this breakdown, everything she had been trying to do to help her wasn’t working and she failed again. She couldn’t save her system/planets, 99.9% of her people are literally dead because she wasn’t strong enough to save them, and she and the other two members of her team had no idea where their princess was or even if she was okay until the episode before this one. Immediately after the destruction of everything they knew, the Starlights had to flee to an alien planet with alien people, disguise themselves, and pander to a bunch of complete strangers that salivated over, stalked, and harassed them, all while searching for their princess  and fighting the minions of the person who ctrl+a ctrl+x’ed their home system. She had no time to process any of the unimaginable loss and failure she had suffered through. When people talk about the rooftop scene and about how Seiya “makes it about herself,” this is everything they’re forgetting. When Seiya is asking Usagi if she isn’t good enough, it isn’t Seiya trying to weasel her way in, it’s Seiya both coping with her own numerous losses and trying to remind Usagi that she’s there for her. In the end, Seiya is the one that Usagi credits with being able to get herself through everything she was dealing with.

[theghostofblackbunnymask]

can you pls write alphabet for yandere fundy ty and ily!!!

Author's note- Little furry boi, I really want more Las Nevadas Crew request

Warnings- Obsession, Worship, mental abuse, Psychological torture, physical abuse, panic attacks (Fundy), lack of freedom, guilt tripping, and fear

Yandere Fundy Alphabet

Affection: How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?

Fundy would be very touch starved, so he would cuddle you, kiss you, and just pick you up and carry you around.

But if Fundy couldn't touch you, he would give you gifts of things you like, he'll spoil you rotten.

Blood: How messy are they willing to get when it comes to their darling?

Fundy can be pretty messy. His main method is quite simple, he'll just slash the person in the back with his claw like nails and then claw them to death.

Cruelty: How would they treat their darling once abducted? Would they mock them?

Fundy wouldn't want to to treat you badly, he doesn't want to be like his father, and just the thought of it makes him sick.

Fundy would treat you with respect and will respect your boundaries, but if you don't like being touched, well I'm sorry because this furry boy will NEVER let you go.

Darling: Aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling’s will?

I mean, possibly touching you if you don't like being touched. Oh, and not taking you outside, he'll only take you to Las Nevadas since you two live there, but even then he'll watch you like a hawk.

Exposed: How much of their heart do they bare to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?

Fundy is pretty vulnerable, everyone basically left him, he can't loose you too. So if anyone threatened his Darling, he would fucking beat them to a pulp until someone pulls him off.

Fight: How would they feel if their darling fought back?

Pretty disappointed, he's given you everything, besides freedom, but who needs freedom anyways when you have someone to think and do things for you. He'd most likely just lock you in your room until you behave.

Game: Is this a game to them? How much would they enjoy watching their darling try to escape?

This. Isn't. A. Fucking. Game. This man would go into straight fucking panic the moment he find out, he may even have a panic attack. But after that he'll calm down and using his fox sense of smell to find you.

Hell: What would be their darling’s worst experience with them?

Picture this:

You just said to Fundy that he was just like his father, and that, that would break him. All of his common sense, all of his self control and all of his sympathy and empathy are all gone.

"Just like Wilbur? HAHAHAH, you think Wilbur would do something like this... Oh... I'll show you what he would do if I'm just like him!"

Fundy would pin you you down and start punching you, and they he would start to claw at your face, and he would only stop when he looks at his hands, all of it covered in blood. Fundy would look at your passed out and limp body with so much regret. He would patch you up while crying and cuddle you saying.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, you're right... I'm just like Wilbur..."

Ideals: What kind of future do they have in mind for/with their darling?

Living in Las Nevadas with no worries. No more wars, no more Dream, no more Wilbur. Just peace.

Jealousy: Do they get jealous? Do they lash out or find a way to cope?

Fundy gets jealous quite easily, and when he does he starts to get rude to the person and insult them until they run off crying. If you were to ask what was that for, he'd just say that he was protecting you and that they were just going to use you for their own disgusting desires.

Kisses: How do they act around or with their darling?

Pretty soft, he'd do whatever you want and treat you like absolute royalty. But don't take him for a push over, the moment he sees your taking advantage of his kindness and generosity, he'd lock you in a room with no food and no water, just so you learn that his kindness and generosity is a privilege, so treat it as such.

Love letters: How would they go about courting or approaching their darling?

Fundy would be so blush around you, he would send you love letters and gifts anonymously, and would watch you when you open them, wanting to see your reaction to his gifts, seeing you happy makes him so happy.

Mask: Are their true colors drastically different from the way they act around everyone else?

Not really, no, but he is 10x softer.

Naughty: How would they punish their darling?

Fundy would never want to hurt you physically or emotionally on purpose, he doesn't want to be Wilbur 2.0

Key words are- Physical or Emotionally.

This man will definitely use some psychology shit on you. Have you heard of white room torture? He would definitely do that. This man would harm you mentally, but he could never harm you physically, cause whenever he sees the scars he starts to cry, seeing himself as a disgusting monster.

Oppression: How many rights would they take away from their darling?

Freedom and freedom of speech. God forbid you mention or say the name Wilbur around him, this man would go insane and beat you to a pulp, before regaining his composure, patching you up, and crying while cuddling you.

Patience: How patient are they with their darling?

Fundy's pretty patient, he understands that love takes time, trust, and that it can be cruel. He'll give you all the time in the world for you to love him, there's no need to worry.

Quit: If their darling dies, leaves, or successfully escapes, would they ever be able to move on?

If you were to escape, he would find you within a few hours, and then drag you right back while ranting and guilt tripping you about how much pain you caused him.

Now if you died, he'd be heartbroken, he wouldn't even take care of himself anymore and would just let his nightmares consume him, and juust allow himself to wake up from those nightmares.

Regret: Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let their darling go?

Fundy would know it's wrong to hold people hostage, but he just wants to protect you, they're too much bad and terrible people on this server and he doesn't want you to fall victim to them, so if kidnaping keeps you safe, then I guess that's what he must do, love hurts, but it'll be worth it in the end.

Stigma: What brought about this side of them (childhood, curiosity, etc)?

☆PEOPLE LEAVING HIM☆ So whenevethe starts to fall for someone or befriend someone, he'd do anything for them not to leave him, but if they abuse or mistreat him, he'd drop and let them go.

Tears: How do they feel about their darling scream, cry, and/or isolate themselves?

Fundy would feel terrible if he made you cry, he would beg you to stop while apologizing. But if someone else made you cry, he would threaten the person.

If you were to yell at him, he may get scared since it reminds him whenever people got upset with him, mainly Wilbur, so Fudny would just back away scared before running off.

If you were to isolate yourself, he would tell you it isn't healthy and that you should talk to him if he or someone else did something wrong.

Unique: Would they do anything different from the classic yandere?

Not really sure.

Vice: What weakness can their darling exploit in order to escape?

A few things actually.

His obsession with you, if you act like you're obsessed with him, you may be able to escape.

His desperate attempts to not be like Wilbur, if you continue to assure him he isn't like Wil, you could gain his trust and escape.

Using guilt tripping against him, make him feel bad and he'll give you more freedom, then you could escape.

Wit's end: Would they ever hurt their darling?

Fundy has outbursts sometimes and during those times he can't control himself, leading him to hurt you. He doesn't mean to though.

Xoanon: How much would they revere or worship their darling? To what length would they go to win their darling over?

A lot of lengths, he basically worships the ground you walk on and would do anything for your love, affection and approval.

Yearn: How long do they pine after their darling before they snap?

1 year.

Zenith: Would they ever break their darling?

Fundy doesn't want to break you, he could never live with that.

[shirophantomvox]

How Illumi, Hisoka, and Chrollo would react to their S/O in the hospital

Hi, anon! You are welcome to join my Discord Server if you are a fan of Hxh, Voltron, or both! I promise this is a safe environment! This is an interesting topic for sure! To the other anon(s), I am working on your request! This will contain both fluff and angst. I forgot to include Leorio in this, so I’ll include him in the next HxH post. You’ll have to forgive me, I have 2 more requests in my inbox and I am not feeling the best. I just got my second Covid shot and it is hurting like hell. Nevertheless, I encourage you all to get your shot if you can. I will be on this site one and off and I should be on it for real next week. I have run out of ideas to write and I began to think I was annoying people with my HxH content (no one said this I just assumed). This post has 1974 words. After these requests are finished, I plan on doing a character analysis for Leorio.

Anyway, let’s get into the post!

We’ll start with Hisoka this time.

Hisoka

In all honesty, this man has heard of a hospital (since he sends a lot of people to it after fights) but has never been in one.

The signs, floors, staircase numbers, and elevators all confuse him. He has only been in one once when he was a kid and has never been again.

He isn’t a social butterfly in this setting because this is a professional establishment and not a college party. Asking for directions takes quite a toll on him because of his established pride. You know guys act when they want to find a destination on their own and will go miles out of the way instead of just asking for direction.

He doesn’t talk to anyone; all he wants to do is find you and make sure you are alright.

He is the tallest person in the freight elevator. So tall that everyone at turns to look at him at once for at least 10 seconds and turn back around surprised.

“How tall is he,” one of the nurses ask.

“Tall enough to be my house!”

This annoys him. He takes out the Joker card and lays it against his thigh but realizes he cannot make any hasty decisions. His bloodlust was activated merely out of irritation and not by threat. You were on his mind and destroying these worthless humans wasn’t an option for today.

He approached the guest desk and waited for about 2 minutes before he was acknowledged.

“May I help you,” a smug receptionist asked. Wow, these people do not know who they’re talking to.

“I’m here to see y/n.”

“Y/n is in room 345. Go down the hall and to the right all the way down.”

This man nearly ran with a quickness! His jester shoes somehow made the floor shake as he ran.

You were awake, eating the horrible food the hospital provided and watching TV. It seemed like you were doing ok, but you had just been in a car accident. Your arms and right leg were still sore. It was so bad that you’d be fine with Hisoka carrying you everywhere.

When you two are alone in serious public places, he doesn’t play games or tricks. He is often portrayed as a ruthless man, but in settings like this, he places the jokes and games aside for later. When he enters your room, he is silent for 30 seconds. Much too long. He was shocked; he walked around your hospital bed, pulled up a chair, and stared at your cast. It had many names written on it.

“Yes, I am ok.”

“I apologize for not being there for you,” he began to say.

“Shh… it’s ok. This is life. It hurts like hell, but I’m a trooper!”

Admiring your cast and its multiple fonts of handwriting and messages, he grabbed a sharpie marker, wrote his name, with a heart and spade next to it. Surprisingly, his cursive was very neat and legible.

“I didn’t know you knew how to write in cursive! Why don’t you write me letters?”

“I see you every day and it hurts my hand.”

The doctor wouldn’t be in for another 1 ½ hours, so Hisoka used your thigh as a pillow as he took a nap. He had been up for countless nights thinking about you. He was screwing up so bad, Chrollo let him leave early.

“As soon as your better, we will fight again. I won’t go easy on you. You won’t be in the hospital but you get the jest.”

Illumi

Illumi isn’t the type of man to overreact in these types of situations. When you both agreed to date each other, you knew you all were tough cookies. You were aware of the dangers of dating an assassin and he knew about the dangers of dating a bounty hunter. People hated you both and you targeted.

One night you both were caught in a vulnerable state. While you both enjoyed chocolate milkshakes at a laid-back 1950’s styled diner, two men were previously thrown out for fighting. While your back was turned one of those men shot your arm, causing you to carelessly throw your body to the ground due to impact.

While everyone else was screaming, Illumi jumped to the ground and tied his hair tie around your arm to temporarily stop the bleeding.

“Illu, why does it feel cold in here,” you managed to breathe out.

His heart dropped to his stomach for the first time in history.

“Don’t say things like that!”

Illumi is already horrible at displaying emotions, but all he could do is frown in fear. Once the EMS came barling in, he demanded that he ride with you.

Illumi hadn’t experienced anything like this since Killua had been injured when he fell from a tree.

You and he were separated when you were rushed into surgery leaving him alone in the waiting room.

When Illumi is stressed and cannot properly display how he feels, he tends to act in “odd” ways.

He begins to furiously turn pages in magazines or bother the receptions every 2 minutes about the status of your surgery. When the woman finally says that you’re still alive, he tones it down a little.

Illumi is open to conforming advice from strangers; he has been receiving it secretly from strangers. Since Silva was busy abusing him, he often found comfort from “the streets”.

He has a bad habit of pacing back and forth and fidgeting in his seat while horrific images fill his mind. All he has seen is pain and even though he was used to it, he didn’t want you to go through it as well.

While sitting in his seat (finally!) and head in his lap, doubled over indescribable sorrow, a little girl walks up to him with her hands folded and a doll under her arms. Illumi feels her presence and looks up. The girl’s curly hair covered her endearing eyes and her smile is wide.

“They’ll be alright. I just know they will,” turning around returning to her mother, the girl said with confidence.

On cue, Illumi placed his hand over his heart, smiling just a little.

He walked quickly to your room once you were out of surgery.

His speed walk mimics one of a soldier; his left arm in since with his right leg. His shoes echoed throughout the hall.

As soon as he enters the room, he shuts the door harder than usual and gives you a tight embrace. This surprises you! You’re lucky if he lays his head on your shoulder!

Illumi had been working out lately. He wanted to beat you in the “squish the melon” contest. He is very competitive and even if he lost, that doesn’t hurt his ego. Not in the slightest. Since it was just the both of you alone, he bends down to hug you tight, so tight that your face is squished against his.

This behavior is only surprising because he usually doesn’t coddle you even when you get hurt, but this time he realized that you could have died from the gunshot wound.

After that he kissed your forehead and almost simultaneously the doctor barreled in just missing the sweet moment between you and your beau.

Chrollo

When Chrollo is holding meetings with the Phantom Troupe, he always appears to be neutral. That is very important. A leader has to show strength even through the worst/hurtful times of their lives.

Chrollo had gotten a call from Nobunaga that you had gotten hurt on a mission and had actually gotten captured by the enemy. Phinks was able to get you back but you suffered horrible injuries.

This is protocol; they do this for any of the members. The troupe was oblivious to the fact that you and Chrollo were dating. They thought you were here to replace Uvo.

In situations like this, he is calm on the outside but screaming on the inside. Common sense will tell you if you are startled by the news you’ve just received and you begin to drive, you could cause more harm on the way to your destination.

Chrollo is very silent; he doesn’t call to check on your status or anything; he would rather see it for himself.

You were a trooper! After all, you are dating a dangerous robber.

Chrollo already knew what room you were in so he just went.

“I knew I should have kept y/n by my side. Y/n insisted on doing my dirty work that they almost died! How foolish could I have been?” He constantly cursed himself for letting his guard down with you.

He always gave you room to think and complete your own tasks but he can’t help his protective nature; one he has for the troupe but times 10.

His childhood friends had been shot by law enforcers, his home was horrific, and the last thing he needed was for you to be gone. You were keeping him afloat in society.

When he opened the door, Phinks was sitting in a chair, one leg over the other, laughing at a TikTok video.

Nobunaga on the other hand was watching the world news and seemed invested that he didn’t hear Chrollo enter the room. Once they both saw, they stood to their feet.

“Y/n is ok boss. They suffered a few cuts and burns, but they're breathing.”

Chrollo’s straight face remained as he stared at you.

Chrollo’s silence is something the troupe has internalized as a sign of anger, rage, or both. When he didn’t speak and just stared, everyone knew that their next mission was going to be a brutal one.

Chrollo is a man that isn’t afraid to express how he feels. He could cry right now if he wanted to and no one would dare laugh at him or insult him. After all, Nobunaga cried when he realized Uvo was dead.

Nobunaga and Phinks excused themselves as they saw him place his hand over his mouth.

Once the door closed, He pulled up the chair, grabbed your hand, and gently squeezed it. His warmth woke you up instantly and you turned your head. You winced in pain causing Chrollo to jump from his seat, moving to your right side so you wouldn’t turn your head too much.

“I’m glad you're alive, darling. What were you doing putting yourself in danger? Feitan could have handled the beast!”

He isn’t trying to doubt your ability to fight, he’s just concerned for your safety. Even so, why would he insist that you join the spiders?

A tear dropped from his face as he silently kissed your hand three times. You smiled warmly and placed your right left hand on top of his.

“I am fine, boss. You need not worry. I’m a trooper, remember?”

He placed your hand against his dry cheek and continued to kiss it. You were his lifeline and he wanted to spend every moment with you.

[thebadbatch]

Hunter X Unwell Reader

Plot: Hunter takes care of the reader as they've fallen ill.

Warnings: Detailed description of being unwell accompanied by a lot of fluff.

--------------------------

Loved

Upon waking, you realized how quickly your heart was beating and how hot you felt. Everything seemed to hit you at the same time, the temperature you appeared to be running made you feel like you were on Tatooine wearing all of the gear you usually wear during missions on Hoth. Your head alone made you wince, shutting your eyes as it grew sharper and more tense - your entire body felt fragile and weak and you were certain that you wouldn't be able to get yourself out of bed without falling. Then again it must be worth a try? Your throat felt dry and coarse, the feeling making you feel like you could die without it.  Attempting to sit up, you pulled your legs out of bed and placed them upon the floor - that previous pain you felt really kicking in now as if it hadn't already.

"Kriff." Your voice mumbled, a sharp pain accompanying it. Pushing yourself up with what remained left of your energy, your body threw itself against the closest wall to keep your body from falling. Quickly Pressing a button on the doors control panel, they finally opened so you could drag yourself into the Havoc Marauders hallway. Your legs began to shake as they held you up and you knew that you wouldn't be able to hold yourself up much longer. "Hunter?" Your gentle-toned voice rang out, worry and fear coating it. Being unwell has always been a struggle for you due to constant thoughts filling your head saying that you'd only get worse and end up dying. Heath anxiety was always a nightmare to deal with and you lay all your thanks to Kamino for giving that to you. Rapid footsteps come closer and closer toward you, completely grateful for the sound as your legs give out resulting in you falling in what felt like slow-motion. Waiting for the hard floor to greet your body, which strangely never came, your eyes opened to see Hunter's worried gaze as you realised you were now in his arms completely vulnerable and weak. They had never seen you like this before, you had never called out for help as you were always making sure that their reckless selves didn't get injured or hurt.

"Y/N!" Hunter spoke, "What's wrong?" Closing your eyes, you hesitantly laid your head against his shoulder with your breaths completely ragged.

"Not well." You managed to croak out, whimpering a little at the wave of pain that engulfed your body. Hunter nodded and began to rush back with you to the cockpit where all of the other members were working on their own individual projects. You had definitely woken up late as all of the others never woke up as early as you did, at the sight of them you knew it was early into the afternoon.

"Tech," Hunter breathed, "Run a med scan for y/n stat." Tech turned in his seat at the never-before heard request for you, the others staring at you completely terrified. He soon stood, running the device over you before gazing at the information he had received.  

"They have the flu." Everyone turned to him with puzzled and worried looks that intertwined. They were clones, they rarely got sick but when they did it was absolute hell. "The flu is a common Illness among humans which features a fever, aching body, exhaustion, cough, sore throat, headaches, loss of appetite, stomach Pain and being sick." He took a deep breath in, "It's a short term illness that will resolve itself in all due time, about five to seven days. Since y/n grew up on Kamino though, this may be one of the first times they're unwell, meaning that everything will feel one hundred times worse. Hunter gently sat down, keeping you against him as he used his fingertips to thread through your hair something you were usually too proud to let him do but you really needed this right now. Whilst leaning into his touch much to his joy, you attempted to speak. 

"No... No tests." Echo looked over at you completely sympathetic, knowing how Kamino must have poked you with every needle available to see how illness affected you. You used to be an experiment for them to see how they could Improve their clones and if anything it just damaged you instead rather then improving them. 

"No tests, Mesh'la." Hunter reassured you continuing to thread his fingertips through your hair, feeling your forehead against your burning temperature. "I promise." His gentle promise seemed to soothe and calm you straight away as you hid your face against his neck.

"How can we help her?" You heard Wreckers voice pipe up, he was always so sweet and fun to be around so when that serious tone drained away his usual laughs you couldn't help but pout.

"Plenty of liquid and food, especially rest and medicine which we will have to retrieve from Ord Mantell." Echo nodded, gazing over at Hunter who couldn't look away from your fragile form clinging to his body for any kind of comfort. "We need to do a Supply run anyway so we can collect it with ease."

"Would you mind staying, Hunter?" Echo questioned as he stood to gather any necessities for the supply run they decided to go on. "I think it's best for one of us to ensure they're safe." Within a heartbeat, Hunter had agreed as the others left to gather everything needed. Now it was just the two of you, leaving Hunter who was more than happy to take care of you. Lifting you up, he carried you to his bunk to softly lay you down under blankets and placed a cold cloth on your forehead that he retrieved from the fresher for you. 

"Don't go." He had heard you whisper, a moment of clarity washing over you as you shifted a little to turn to him clinging to the pillow that smelt like him. A chuckle left his lips as he sat on the bed with you.

"I won't go anywhere, y/n." Those words alone gave out immense comfort before you pulled back the blankets for him to cuddle with until things stopped hurting as badly. Once he had cuddled back down with you, holding you delicately in his arms he began rubbing soft Circles against your back. "When they get back I want you to take the medicine and make  Sure You drink plenty of water and have a little something to eat. Understood?" His words were more like soldier-talk, but you understood he did that when he was stressed or worried. A simple nod was returned by you before you hid against the warmth of his chest beginning to get some well-needed rest.

"Y/n…" A softer voice spoke which made you wince and furtherly hide against Hunter's chest, gripping his blacks. "Mesh'la, you need to take your medicine…" Opening your eyes, you Peeked above the comfort and safety of Hunter's blankets and his body - clearly not impressed that you were awoken by them. 

"They seem angry..." Wrecker spoke, a little spooked at your angered expression. 

"They will be."  Hunter chuckled, his thumb running across your cheek causing you to melt into his touch with a smile. 

"They've woken up to us needing them to take medicine, waking them from what relief sleep offered from y/n's flu." Tech gently crouched so he could see you clearly, Showing you a glass of water and a tablet. "Please take this, Cyar'ika." Nodding at his gentle tone, you took the tablet and water much to their glee.

"Good job, Mesh'la." Echo spoke with a Smile, "We will leave you both be. Shout for us if you need us okay?" Hunter thanked his brothers before turning back to face you, wiping some water away from your mouth. 

"Why don't you sleep now y/n?" He smiled, pressing a kiss to your forehead as your eyes began to shut - excited for some relief from your aching body. "You'll feel better soon, I won't leave your side." His Previous kiss soon moved to your cheek as he held you even closer, protecting you from everything and anything. "I love you." With that, you finally drifted off with a smile, entirely in love with everything about The Bad Batch. Despite being unwell, you knew that you were free from the past and got to enjoy a well deserved future filled with people you loved and people who loved you too. 

[holdmecloser-gandydancer]

love and revolution

Magnus was intently working on a bookshelf. It was made of a beautiful, dark mahogany and, upon the request of the customer, was going to have dozens of birds carved into the sides and edges. He began sanding the shelves with a fine grit sandpaper. For a while, the only sound in the Hammer and Tongs was the soft, repetitive noise of wood being worn down.

The calm monotony was broken when the front door creaked open. Magnus looked up and grinned at the entrant; Julia Waxman, loaded down with bags from various merchants in town, had returned, the last dregs of the late afternoon sun trailing in after her. The sharp bite in the air let everyone know winter was just around the corner.

Magnus quickly stood up to relieve Julia of her burden She smiled and handed him half the bags in her arms. As the pair got to work unloading the bags, Magnus frowned. Everything Julia had brought home was either small, poor quality, or about to turn.

“This is what everyone had. Season’s been tough for farming and everyone’s raising prices to keep up with Kalen’s tariffs,” Julia said before Magnus could comment. She inspected the hard loaf of bread she’d been able to grab.

Magnus shook his head. For nearly a year, Governor Kalen and his cronies had been enacting increasingly harsh laws, oppressive curfews, and predatory taxes; the citizens of Raven’s Roost all felt the firm pressure of Kalen’s fine leather boots on the neck of their economy and of their freedom.

“How is everyone doing?”

Julia shrugged. “They’re all doing as well as they can. The Silverstrings are worried because their wheat harvest was half as fruitful this year as it was last year and a good portion of what grew was seized by Kalen.”

“Lucatiel?”

“His wool has largely been commandeered by Kalen. He hopes to be able to shear another large batch before winter hits in earnest but he’s uncertain.”

“And Therala?”

“Her herd’s dwindling. Most of the calves from this past spring either died or –“

“Were taken by Kalen and his pals. Right. Jules, how does he keep getting away with this?”

Julia laughed sharply and started putting some of the dry goods in the storage closet in the back of the shop. “Magnus, that’s just how things have always been here. For a while, anyway.”

“But how’d he even get into power in the first place?” There was nothing but pure astonishment in his voice. In the five years he’d lived in Raven’s Roost, he’d never quite been able to comprehend how someone so ruthless could have gotten the trust of the town; his friends and neighbors were good, honest folks and good judges of character. It made no sense to Magnus.

She puffed out her cheeks and thought for a moment. “He helped form Raven’s Roost into a proper town. We used to be vulnerable to bandits and those who sought to cause pain. He was stern but that kept us in shape. He used to be better. Genuinely. Not good, not at all, but not like this. His policies were never quite this harsh. I suppose he’s gotten greedy.”

“It’s senseless for him to dig this deep this quickly. If it continues like this, I don’t know that the town is going to last much longer.”

Julia said nothing. She knew Magnus was right but what was to be done about it? The two continued to unpack and put away items in silence.

“Papa won’t talk to me about how business is going here. Said he doesn’t want me to worry about things. How are we doing?” Julia looked at Magnus seriously.

He hesitated. Steven had specifically asked him to not discuss the business with Julia but when he saw her in front of him, firm hands anxiously picking at a sliver on the table, he found it hard to deny her.

“We’ve done better. I’m sure you’re aware the craftsmen corridor has been hit pretty hard by all the tariffs. Not only can we hardly afford to replace the tools and materials we need but the rest of the town can’t exactly afford our wares. We get the occasional customers,” he gestured to the bookshelf he’d been working on. “But we’re not doing great.”

Julia nodded and looked down. “That’s not exactly reassuring. But thanks for telling me.”

“Of course. Just don’t tell your dad I said anything,” he said sheepishly.

“Deal,” she said, glancing back at him with a smile.

-

Magnus sat on a bench outside the Hammer and Tongs and stared up at the moons. His teeth were chattering quietly but he wasn’t quite ready to turn in for the night. Isaiah Erksine, Kalen’s right-hand man, had distributed yet another list of tariffs and regulations to all the shops in Raven’s Roost earlier in the day. They were unconscionable; taxes and levies on every single scrap of material you could think of. Harsher curfews that made it nearly impossible for those in the craftsmen corridor to do much else besides make goods that nobody could afford. It was like the very essence of life was slowly being choked out of the town. Or, at the very least, the spirit of its inhabitants.

Magnus’s ruminative spiral was broken when he felt a thick, scratchy blanket draped over his shoulders. He glanced up and smiled; Julia, dressed far more sensibly than Magnus, darted a hand back through the doorway. In a moment, Magnus’s hands were wrapped around a piping hot mug of mint tea. Admittedly, the drink was more water than tea, but he drank it appreciatively.

“You seem troubled,” Julia mused, sipping from her own chipped mug.

“I am, Julia.” He confirmed, scooting over to make room on the bench. Julia mulled it over for a minute before sitting down. Heat was radiating off her like a fire and it took everything in Magnus to not immediately wrap his arms around her and hold her close. Though he did scoot a little closer. You know, to keep warm.

“I’d like to think that we could go a single week without tax hikes but it’s seeming more and more like a pipe dream,” she said flatly. “I hate this. I’ve lived among these people for as long as I can remember. Raven’s Roost is my home. When I was a little girl, I always used to think dream about the day that I’d get to raise my own family here. It felt like such a safe and warm place. And now…” She glanced at Magnus before she looked to the sky. “Now most days I feel like things might be easier if I just go somewhere else. And I don’t want that. I want to stay. I want to want to stay. I just don’t know that there’s going to be anything to stay for if this keeps up.”

“I want there to be something here for you,” Magnus murmured quietly, looking at Julia’s profile in the moonlight.

“Magnus, believe me, I don’t want to leave my home. I don’t want to leave –“ She looked at Magnus from the corner of her eye. “I don’t want to leave the people here. I just don’t think I can keep living under Kalen.”

“What if we don’t have to?” The words escaped Magnus’s mouth before he could even make sense of them himself.

Julia lurched and turned to look at Magnus, bewildered. “I’m sorry?”

Magnus had a choice. He could have easily retracted his statement. He could have laughed it off. But instead of thinking it over for any amount of time, he doubled down. “What if we don’t have to keep living under Kalen? What if we could still live here, in Raven’s Roost, but without that tyrant?”

Julia looked around before scooting closer to Magnus, their wind-chapped noses nearly touching. “Are you suggesting…” she took a breath, as though to steel herself. “Are you suggesting a revolt?”

Magnus could barely focus on the question with Julia this close to him. “I-I think I am,” his voice was near silent.

Julia nodded. “Okay. How’re we going to do this?”

-

Watery winter light did its best to penetrate the frost coated windows of the Hammer and Tongs. Magnus was idly whittling a piece of scrap wood. There weren’t any orders to work on and Candlenights was right around the corner; he figured he could fashion something homemade for both Julia and Steven.

His pocketknife nearly went flying out of his hand when the door of the shop burst open, startling him out of his focus. Standing in the doorway was a young earth genasi he recognized from town. He looked frantic and near tears. Magnus set his project down.

“Hey, Allura, what’s the matter?” Magnus asked, inviting the young man inside and shutting the door behind him.

“Magnus, it’s my dad,” Allura choked out. He looked gaunt and miserable; Magnus thought back to a few months ago when the entire Mountaindeep family came into the Hammer and Tongs, jovially talking about commissioning a crib, as a new baby was on the way. Allura, a kid all of fifteen, had chattered to him for ten minutes about how excited he was to become a big brother. He looked decidedly less excited in that moment.

“What happened?”

“W-we couldn’t pay the tariffs. My dad has been charging everyone half price. H-he said he couldn’t hike the prices up, it wasn’t right. And we couldn’t… Kalen took him away!” he cried, bordering on hysterical.

“Allura, buddy, you gotta breathe, okay? What do you mean Kalen took him?” Magnus led him to a chair.

“H-he hauled him off to the prison and I don’t know what’s gonna happen to him and my m-mom’s giving birth soon and I can’t help with that, I don’t know how,” He managed to get out, hiccupping between every few words, too distraught to calm down.

“Julia!” Magnus called up the staircase in the back of the shop. He had to get this kid to stop crying so he could get the full story and Julia tended to have a calming presence on, well, everyone.

In a moment, she appeared at the bottom of the stairs and sent Magnus a confused look. He nodded towards the crying teenager as explanation.

Julia rushed over, knelt down, and took Allura’s face in her thick hands. “Hey, hon, can you breathe with me?” she cooed gently. And for a few minutes, the shop was silent, save for Julia counting breaths for Allura.

“Can we hear the story again, bud?” Magnus asked quietly after a few moments.

Allura nodded and sniffled. “You guys know that Kalen raised the tariffs. Again. Um. My dad decided to slash his prices, not raise them to keep up. Said he couldn’t. He’s a big follower of Helm and he said it wasn’t right to keep medicines behind a steep price. He just wanted to help people. But Kalen came collecting today and he took my dad. And it’s not just him. He took Mr. Anvilrock and Sevara Mountainwillow and a few other people. And I don’t know what’s going to happen to them,” he said, his voice small and scared.

Magnus and Julia exchanged a look. She sent him a nod and turned back to Allura. “Okay. Thank you for telling us. Do you think that you can do us a favor?”

Allura furrowed his brow but nodded cautiously.

“Go around to the others in the craftsmen corridor and tell them to meet at the Hammer and Tongs tomorrow night? Just tell them it’s really important that everyone come. And if Kalen or his buddies ask you about it, be as vague as you can.” Magnus said seriously.

“If you’re asked about it, say that I’m teaching everyone how to patch their own clothes since Masden had to close down shop. ” Julia offered.

“But what about the curfew?” Allura asked, voice meek and eyes rimmed with red.

Magnus thought for a moment. “Tell everyone that we might have a way to keep us from having to worry about curfew ever again. I just need everyone to trust me.”

“I think I can do that.” Allura said, rising from the chair.

Julia patted him on the shoulder and slipped a gold piece into his hand. Before he could protest, she held her hand up and shooed him out the door.

Magnus rubbed his face for a moment. “Something’s gotta give, Jules.”

Julia reached a tentative hand out to squeeze Magnus’s hand quickly. “After tomorrow, I think something will. I hope.”

-

“Can either of you tell me why three separate people assured me that they’d do their best to make it to the shop tonight when I stopped in town a little bit ago?” Steven asked from the kitchen table.

Julia avoided her father’s gaze, busying herself with prepping tea instead.

Magnus focused intently on cracking eggs without getting any bits of shell in the bowl. He quickly whisked them together and held off on adding any salt or pepper to the mixture before setting them in the skillet. That was a little tip he picked up from—he thought for a moment—well, from his moms, he supposed. Apparently kept the egg from getting tough or something. He wasn’t really sure what that meant but followed the rule without fail. Made for good eggs, anyway.

“Am I just meant to be okay with the two of you encouraging our friends and neighbors to break the law to come over for a late-night chat?” A stern edge crept into Steven’s voice.

“Steven, we just wanted to have a meeting with the other craftsmen.”

“About what? What’s so important that it requires possibly getting some good people thrown in jail?”

“People are already getting thrown in jail!” Magnus protested. “Allura Mountaindeep came crying in here yesterday. His dad’s in prison, along with a handful of others who couldn’t pay. I just…Steven, you don’t have to agree with what we’re doing but you have to understand. I can’t keep sitting by and watch the town and people I love be beaten down by some big bully.”

Magnus returned his gaze to the eggs. The silence in the kitchen was broken by the teakettle’s shrill whistle.

“We have a plan. And hell, after tonight, it might not even be anything. But Papa, aren’t you tired of struggling? You can be as stoic as you like but I know the truth. This isn’t the life we should all be living. We should be able to have some shred of hope for a future that could matter. A future that isn’t just toiling until we die.” Julia stared at her father as she moved the kettle from the flame.

Steven stared back for a moment before glancing back at Magnus. He let out a sigh. “We can have the meeting but everyone is out before moonrise.”

Magnus and Julia smiled wide.

“Deal.” Magnus said, dividing the eggs between the three plates.

-

A hush fell over the group of craftmakers who all crammed into the Hammer and Tongs. It was a tight fit but it appeared that most of the corridor had managed to make the meeting. The sun had long since set, leaving only the meekest dregs of light hanging in the sky; moonrise was due in less than an hour. Magnus knew he had to make the meeting quick.

“I’m sure you’ve all heard of the few imprisonments that have come about as a result of Kalen’s new tariffs.” Magnus began, bouncing his gaze across those gathered in the shop.

A grumble of acknowledgement reverberated through the dense crowd.

“And I’m sure you all know that any of us could be subject to the same treatment just for being at this meeting.”

More noises of agreement bubbled up in the crowd.

“Then I’ll make it quick and worth your risk. I hate seeing Raven’s Roost like this. I know in my bones it could be better if things were different. I hate seeing everyone beaten down by these laws. I hate seeing Kalen’s friends allowed to do whatever they want, whenever they want, and never see any kind of repercussions for it. I’m sick of seeing people starving in the streets. Sick of seeing families torn apart because one of them had the audacity to be a kind person. I want Raven’s Roost to be a flourishing place.” He glanced over to Julia and pink stained his cheeks. “I want to be able to raise a family here. I want to want that. But as it stands, I don’t know that I can imagine a future for Raven’s Roost. I don’t know how many of us can last like this for much longer.”

“And what exactly are you proposing we do about it?” Hector Anvilrock, another metalworker in town, demanded.

“We’re proposing a revolution.” Magnus said simply.

The shop erupted in conversation. It began civil enough but quickly devolved into name calling and accusations of espionage and snitching. Magnus’s stomach dropped. He knew it wasn’t going to be an easy sell but if this was any indication, he feared for the future of any kind of revolution.

“Enough!” Julia said, climbing onto a chair. She was already taller than Magnus and nearly as broad so the added height made her the single most imposing figure in the room, though her warm brown eyes added an air of compassion. “I understand it’s a scary thought. But do we really think it’s a better idea to just roll over and get kicked? Sure, Kalen has numbers and power and resources. But we actually have something worth fighting for. We have the most skilled craftspeople on the continent. We have conviction. And we have a goal.” She sighed and rubbed her hand down her face. “I understand if any of you are scared or apprehensive. I won’t make demands. I won’t beg. I want you all to join us but I won’t look down on you for not getting involved. I just want to know that we can trust you.”

She glanced over at Magnus who was watching her, stars in his eyes. She raised her eyebrows at him and sent him a tiny nod.

“Well?” He asked, seeming to snap out of his daze. “Can we trust all of you?”

It felt like the entire show was holding its breath until Hector nodded. And then Allura. And then Therala. One by one, each person in attendance gave a silent pledge.

Magnus grinned, relief flooding his veins. This was only the first step, but they’d already hurdled over it with grace. He was certain they’d be able to make Raven’s Roost a safe place for all someday.