#they live in a house or something and sleep in two seperate rooms

[dante-mightdie]

part 3. of the toxic!simon adventure (contains smut)

alex begins making many more appearances in your life and simon can’t fuckin’ stand it. tells himself that there’s just something off about that guy, doesn’t seem like he could protect you if it came to it. this statement made price let out a scoff in response

“he’s one of the best soldiers i’ve ever worked with, simon. besides, they’re just bein’ friendly with each other.”

“too friendly…” simon mumbles under his breath, narrowing his eyes as he watches you laugh at one of alex’s silly puns

simon spends a lot of time at the Price household. he says it’s because your old man lives closer to base but the truth is he can’t stand being alone in his flat in manchester, haunted and plagued by the chaos he’s seen on the field

he didn’t appreciate how often he was bumping into alex keller when he came to visit. price claiming that alex has to some work to conduct in the UK and offered him a place to stay. nothing to overthink, he says.

except for the fact that you’re both attached at the hip. watching tv together, joining alex on his morning runs, driving you around to help you run your errands. simon watches with a twitch in his eye, a mean feeling bubbling up in his chest as he watches his favourite toy get snatched up by the new kid in the playground

simon is constantly finding opportunities to get in your way, or more specifically, get in Alex’s way. He’ll watch from the kitchen as Alex’s hand twitches to reach out for yours when you’re both watching some show you were both talking about at dinner…

so simon decides he wants to watch that show too, planting himself right beside you, if he was any closer he would be sitting in your lap.

he caught a peek of the two of you stood in the back garden, alex pointing up at the night stars and leaning over to whisper something in your ear, making you giggle

so simon decided he needed to have a cigarette right that second, stalking out into the garden and slamming the door to announce his presence

“not interrupting anythin’, am I?”

you both sheepishly smile and shake your heads, seperating from each other

later on that night when the house is quiet and everyone has headed off to bed, simon finds himself unable to sleep. he thinks about going for a smoke or having another glass of bourbon but instead finds himself with his hand down his sweats, sloppily pumping his cock

in his other meaty hand, he holds his phone. a picture of you clad in some stringy lingerie that you sent to him one late night a few months ago. these pictures were always the product of you having a bad day and then being ignored by simon

crying in your room because he’s an emotionally unavailable prick, telling yourself that you’re over it and you’re gonna ignore him too. and then less than an hour later, your posing for your camera in a desperate attempt to get him to come to your room

well, at least, that’s what you used to do. simon never responded to these pictures. not even a thumbs up. perhaps you got tired of being ignored by him, simon thinks. or maybe you want him to send you a picture this time. or maybe, just fucking maybe, you’re sending these pretty pictures to someone else…

the thought makes simon yank his hand from his trackies with a curse falling from his lips. his cock aching and leaking against the material of his boxers, desperate for release. he snatches his mask from the bedside table and trudges down the hallway, only to stop at the sound of breathy moans coming through the crack of your door

it’s nearly 2AM. why is the light on in your room? why are you awake? simon’s brain runs a mile a minute with thoughts of you. when did he start thinking about you?

he places a hand on your door and slowly pushes it open enough so you can’t see his bulky frame in the dark hallway

and there you are. laying on your back with your forearm over your eyes, loud moans escaping your throat as desperate sobs. for a second, simon’s brain doesn’t even notice there’s another person in your room, too focused on watching your blissed out expression to notice that Alex was on top of you, pushing on your thighs to tuck your knees behind your ears

the slick sounds of your pussy being fucked would probably have been enough to keep simon’s cock hard, but not when he’s watching you fall apart in another man’s arms

he’s got you folded into a mating press, repeatedly slapping his hips into yours. he nearly vomits from rage when he hears you cry out his name

“Alex! fuck, I can’t… ‘s too much…” you whine out, bracing your hands on his shoulders when Alex reaches up to grip the headboard of your bed

“yeah, ya can, sugar. so good for me. such a good fucking girl. all pretty for me, ain’t that right, baby?” he whispers in your ear, but simon heard it. and it makes him fucking rage that this is what has become of him. standing in the pitch black corridor, watching you get fucked by another man like a pervert

but simon isn’t getting off on this. no, how can he enjoy staring at your panties dangling from your ankle knowing he wasn’t the one tugging them off your wet pussy? how can enjoy the sound of your moans when you silence them by pulling on Alex’s dogtags for a kiss?

you look so pretty when you come, simon thinks to himself as you squeal and kick your feet against Alex’s back. so pretty when it’s too much for you…

not that simon would know. he always turned your face away from his when you fucked, putting you on your knees and shoving your face into the mattress.

simon decides it’s too much for him to handle when he hears you begging for Alex to come inside of you. stalks back to his lonely room and unlocks his phone, shoving his hand back into his boxers and loading up a picture of you…

[brittscafe]

𝐅𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐲 𝐖𝐢𝐧𝐤𝐬

Pairing: Gojo, Geto, Nanami, and Toji x gn! reader (seperate)

Summary: When you catch them in the act...of falling asleep...

Content: Fluff, slight cursing, nothing suggestive.

Gojo

The house was quiet when you got home, too quiet. You didn't hear Satoru's dramatic, loud voice down the hallway nor did you see him rushing down the hallway to greet you.

Your eyes dart around the entrance of your house and you set your stuff down.

"Satoru?" you call out, your voice echoing in the empty hallway. You make your way down the hallway and into your room, the door creaking openly quietly.

The sight you see makes your heart felt. A smile makes its way onto your face as you gaze at Satoru, his knees bent up into his stomach as he's curled up into a ball on your shared bed.

His white hair is hanging down in front of his forehead and the blanket is up to his knees. The golden sun is peaking in through the blinds, rays glistening onto Satoru's pale, perfect face.

Satoru is so perfect, especially laying here in the sunlight, fast asleep and at such peace. You wonder over to the bed and sit down on it, the bed sinks down a little.

You rake your fingers up and down Satoru's back. You watch as his side goes up and down with his breathing. You chuckle quietly and curl up beside him.

You wrap your an arm around his torso and press a soft kiss into his back...

Geto

Silence. Silence wasn't unusual between you and Geto. The two of you would be in the same bed, sharing the silence as you are occupied in different activies.

Your face is buried in a book, humming quietly. Something falls onto your shoulder and you perk your head up. You glance over at your shoulder and see Geto's head resting on your shoulder, his eyes are closed.

A piece of his raven hair is hanging down in front of his face and you place your book down in your lap. You reach your hand across Geto's face and cup his cheek, that one that's not smushed against your shoulder.

Your thumb gently caresses his soft skin and Geto curls his body into yours. He throws his leg around your thigh and a smile dances along your face.

You move your hand up his cheek and brush your fingers through his hair, moving it away from his blissful face. Geto's soft, tender sleeping face made your stomach have butterflies.

"Goodnight, Suguru," you speak in a quiet voice, pressing a kiss on his forehead as you close your book.

Nanami

Your boyfriend was a hard working man, usually putting in overtime at his workplace. It wasn't unusual for Nanami to take short naps after work, but you're were never there when he was, until today.

You come in through the front door and Nanami is in his usual spot on the couch, glasses off. Your eyes gaze over his face, he's fast asleep.

His head is tilted back, resting on the top of the couch. His mouth is slightly open and he's inhaling and exhaling heavy breathes. His blonde hair is still nicely combed back over on one side and he looks so handsome right now.

Nanami is vulnerable and at a level of peace, you've never seen before. His broad shoulders are no longer tense like they are when he's at work.

You quickly, but quietly set your stuff down and slide off your shoes, heading over to the couch.

You glance over at the blanket beside Nanami and grab it, carefully draping it over his lower half. You grin warmly, admiring the peaceful, sleeping man that you're towering over.

You carefully whisk your knuckles on his jawline and chew on your bottom lip, gazing at him.

Toji

You and Toji had busy lives that made the two of you exhausted. You had seen Toji fall asleep at the most unusual spots. You name it and he's probably fallen asleep there.

You head into the living room where Toji is fast asleep on the couch, one arm hanging off of it. You chuckle, a little too loud and Toji's eyelids slowly open.

"Come here," Toji mumbles out, his voice husky and groany. Your mouth gapes open and Toji grabs onto your wrist, tugging you down onto the couch.

Your body doesn't have time to react as you collide into Toji's chest and he wraps his strong, muscular arms around you. His arms squeeze you tightly and you chuckle, a smile tugging on your face.

"Damn, Toji, you're squeezing me," you groan out as his arms are crushing your waist. Toji smirks widely and shakes his head, loosening his grip on you.

"Shut up," he sighs out, pressing a chaste kiss to your cheek and then returning to closing his eyes. It doesn't take long for Toji to fall back asleep, arms secured around you and his cheek resting along your shoulder.

You can't hide the growing smile that's forming on your face as Toji breathes heavily into your ear, falling into a deep sleep.

Donate/tip

[writingoddess1125]

In Another Life

Depression Time!!

Trafalgar Law x FemReader

Sadness, Angst, Death. And More Saddness!

Support me on Ko-Fi! Gotta survive to write more!

Wrote this while watching a movie- can probably guess the movie..

'Law! You have to promise me, when we get married we get a kitten' You giggled at your long term . The two of you holding hands as you walked through the meadows next to the secret base.

Law bristled at your words, remembering his own parents and the happiness they shared- but also the heartache he experienced thinking of them. The two of you looking to each other-

'Why do you say that?'

'Cause kittens are cute?- especially ones with gray fur and blue eyes' He cut you off with an annoyed scoff.

'No the marriage thing? Why would you think I'd marry you!?' His words harsh and rude which made you flinch.

'Law.. We aren't long for this world- we have already spent most of our lives together then seperate.. I'd want to spend the rest of it with you' You said so softly, confuses by his tone. Law yanking his hand away from you in false anger.

'Then I shouldn't waste my time in doing something stupid like marriage' He said annoyed. Your eyes filling up with tears, you didn't say a word. Instead walking away from him- he didn't stop you. Assuming you had just went to clear your mind from the harsh reality- but he didn't expect you to never return at all...

He should have know... he should have truly heard her words when she said she waan't long for this world...

That had been years ago.. he hadn't heard or seen (Y/N) since. Truthfully he regretted that so much- his world ever darker since that day.

At night he would wince when he thought back on his words before sleep- his dreams filled with the life he should have had with her if he wasn't so angry at the world.

It had been a few days ago however when he'd gotten a letter- recognizing your handwriting so well. But he never could have even guessed the words on those pages- asking to see him again before (Y/N) passed... a illness no one could treat claiming her life and taking her away soon.

Running to her home, he went to the hospital she was in- entering the room with a heavy heart knowing what was on the other side.

Law had always been a man of few words, but as he stood by (Y/N)'s side one final time, a thousand emotions wrestled within his heart. Her form weakened by the ravages of time, lay in a bed adorned with soft blankets that him and others had brought for her, her frail hand clasped in Law's strong grip.

"I wish we had more time," Law murmured, his voice heavy with regret.

(Y/N) smiled weakly, her eyes shimmering with love as the light began to fade from them. "We've had a lifetime of memories, Law. I am grateful for the time we've shared."

Her words struck Law like a blade to the chest, as he struggled to hold back the tears threatening to spill. His hardened exterior cracked, and vulnerability seeped through the cracks.

"I often dreamed of a life together, you know," Law confessed, his voice barely above a whisper. "A quiet house by the sea, with our children running through the sand. We would sit on the porch, holding hands and watching the sunset."

Her expression softened with reminiscence, her voice a gentle melody. "That sounds like a beautiful lofe, Law. A life filled with love and peace."

Law's grip on (Y/N)'s hand tightened, as if trying to hold onto the fleeting moments they had left. "I would have given anything to make that dream a reality. To protect you, to see you smile every day."

(Y/N) lifted her free hand and gently caressed Law's cheek. "You have already given me so much, Law. The love you have shown me is more than I could have ever asked for."

Tears rolled down Law's face, his breathing uneven as he held back sobs. "If you'd had told me- I could have save you! protect you from the cruelty of this world. But..."

Her touch provided a soothing balm to Law's tortured soul. "You gave me a life filled with adventure, love, and purpose. Our time together has been a gift, Law.. even if it had to end like this."

Law lowered his head- sitting next to her as his tears started to drip onto the bed, his shoulders shaking with silent sobs. (Y/N) despite her weakened state, gathered her strength and pulled Law into a tender embrace. They held each other, the weight of their emotions filling the room like an unspoken song.

As the sun began to set, its warm glow bathing the room in a golden light, Law whispered his final words into her ear. "I will carry your love within me until my last breath, and beyond. You have forever changed me, and our love will have another day."

(Y/N)'s touch grew feeble, her breathing shallow. She mustered the strength to raise her gaze to meet Law's tear-stained eyes. "Thank you for loving me, Law. I will always be with you, in your heart."

With those tender words, (Y/N) slipped away, leaving Law alone in a world forever altered. He held her lifeless hand, his despair mingling with the emptiness in his chest as loud desperate cries ripped through his soul.

Law sat in the inn, staring at the empty bottles infront of him- his chest feeling hallow and full of regret. Part of him wanting to walk into the sea and return to his love.. see her smiling face one last time-

Rolling himself up from his seat, he stumbled out of the bar- the alcohol making his brain fuzzy and uneven as he was met with the cold night air. His mind drifting to the sea... maybe he would see (Y/N) on the other side- his family.. love out that fantasy the two of you had always wished for.. one that he was too stupid to realize was more important than anything else-

As he walked down to the peir, his mind only of his regrets in life.

He looked out on the ocean, his legs felt like they were lead and he wanted to jump in and let the Goddess claim him- till the sound of his name drew him back. Looking to see a man in a suit rushing to him with a box and crate in tow.

"You there! Are you Trafalgar Law?"

"Yeah what's it to you?" Law grumbled-

"Ah Sir. Im Wallace J, Lawyer for (Y/N)- You were listened in ger will fkr everhthing including her home but (Y/N) had left some items that needed to be personally handed to you- oh and this" The man said calmly as he gestured to the crate.

Law looked confused by this and nodded, taking the box and opening it. There his heart broke for a second time that day- there was several letters, with his name on it- he knew (Y/N) hand writing too well to say these were from anyone else.. paired with the dried flower ring he had made her years ago when the two of them were children, with other sentimentalthings from his childhood. The lawyer holding out a letter that had been separated from the box. The doctor quickly taking it and reading it-

My Darling Law

As I write this letter, I want my time with you in this world has come to an end. But i want you to know that my love for you is unwavering, and my deepest wish is for your happiness. Life is a journey filled with twists and turns, and in those moments when I may not be by your side, I implore you to seek joy and love.

Find someone who fills your soul, someone who understands and cherishes the beautiful person you are. Embrace love, laughter, and companionship with another. Life is too short to settle for anything less than genuine happiness.

Remember, your life is precious and unique, and your happiness is what I want the most for you.

So while I can't be there to be on that journey, I still want you to walk thay path. I know you are hurt, and im sorry i was the one who caused it.. but I hope this little guy can give you just a bit of love to you while you find your way.

I love you Law, to the end of the stars and back.

Forever yours, (Y/N)

The doctor gave a breathy sigh as a sob threated to spill from him. Setting the box down as he looked to the crate, Opening it slowly and tears rolled down at the sight.

A gray kitten with sleepy blue eyes mewed at him- Law reaching forward and picking up the little thing. Remembering the words when the two of shared long ago.

'When we get married- you better get me a kitten. One with gray fur and blue eyes'

The lawyer watching in empathy, watching the man before him crumble and fall to his knees as he held the kitten in his arms.

[bruhhhh-huhhhhh]

if you could by chance, feed my obsession with some graves fluff, anything you want just something fluffy.

my obsession is out of hand, thank youu. <3

Anything for you boo thing <3

Coming Home

It had been a long few months for the both of you. You'd both be sent on missions by Shepard, a man you hated ever so dearly.

The worst part?

You weren't sent on them together.

You both didn't see each other, and when you did you had to act like you didn't know each other. It was nothing short of torture.

But you pushed through. The mission was simple enough. Get info and deliver it safely. It only took four months of sleeping alone in a safe house far too big for just yourself.

When you got home, you wanted nothing more than to see your boyfriend. But the house was eerily silent when you opened the door, and you knew that you had gotten home before he did.

So, ever so carefully, you sat your bag down in your shared bedroom and walked back out to the living room. You plopped down onto the couch, and started mindlessly scrolling through your phone that you had only just gotten back a few hours ago.

It took Phillip two hours to get out of the base and back to your shared home. The whole time he was nervously itching at his pocket, making sure his gift for you was still there.

When he finally got home, the sight of you on the couch made his heart leap into his throat. He missed you so much.

Graves sprinted to the couch, diving onto you and pulling you into the longest hug ever.

"Fucking hell, Phil," you complained, smooshed into his chest.

He just shushed you and placed a kiss onto your forehead. "I missed you," he confessed.

"I missed you too, but you don't see me jumping over the couch onto you."

"I didn't jump over the couch! I jumped from the side of the couch and... oh." It took him a minute to realize that he had, in fact, jumped over the couch. "Oops."

You just sighed and kissed him.

He, regretfully, pulled away and stood up. You went to follow suit, but he just pushed you back down. "No, no. I have something to give you," he explained.

You were curious as to what it was, but he was adamant on getting dinner and then giving it to you. Phillip ordered from your favorite restaurant and had it delivered to the house.

While the two of you waited, you cuddled on the couch and told each other everything that had happened while you were away. Graves got up and got the food from the driver, insisting that you stay sitting, and brought it over to the couch.

He placed the boxes on the coffee table and the two of you kept talking while you ate. Four months is a lot of time to be gone, after all.

When he was sure that you both were done eating, he cleaned everything. When you complained that you wanted to do something, Phil just shook his head and pressed a kiss to your cheek. "You deserve to be treated tonight. I don't want you lifting a finger."

With an eye roll, you let him keep doing whatever he wanted.

When Phil came back, he looked a little more nervous than before. Carefully, ever so carefully, he pulled something out of his pocket and got down on one knee.

"Y/n, I've loved you for a long time. I've known that I wanted to marry you for just as long. I planned on waiting just a little longer for the right moment, but after that mission we just had I couldn't. It was paining me not to have you with me at night. To not hear your laugh, your sarcastic comments. To not see the way you smiled when I told you I loved you or to see you roll your eyes at my jokes. I want you to be my husband so that I can argue when Shepard tries to seperate us. Will you marry me?" Graves asked, his eyes hopeful.

You couldn't help the smile that split your face, and you jumped off the couch and into his arms. "Obviously yes! God, I've been waiting forever for this!"

Phillip smiled and kissed you, tears springing to his eyes.

The two of you stayed like that for a minute before he pulled away and slipped the ring on your finger. It was beautiful, made with all your favorite colors and gems.

Graves picked you up and took you to your shared bedroom and laid you down in bed before getting in himself. He held you close to him, not wanting to let go.

He never wanted to let go if he could help it.

[cherryjuixce]

Trust me. (Captain John Price x reader)

Warnings: swearing, slight mentions of reader being s/a in the past, if that triggers you please skip this one!, reader is a smoker.

A/N: This was requested by a lovely anon! Just for a disclaimer, this is completely platonic. It took me a long time to finish this because I haven't had the perfect time to actually write out all at once, and I don't know if It's even good or not but I hope I lived up to the expectations of my anon<3

Words: 2.4k

Your back was aching in absolute pain. The only thing on your mind is to go to bed, even though you knew you wouldn't get a lot of sleep as always.

Price was currently driving next to you. The silence between you two and the neat road making your eyes drop every few seconds because of how tired you were. The radio in the car was off, thinking about if you should turn it on or not crossed your mind many times, at the end deciding it was better off, even though the awkward silence was killing you.

You were on a mission with Gaz and him when it sidetracked a bit, making you and Price be seperated from Gaz due to Laswell's request of him helping her to find the drug cartels.

You never admitted it, but this was the first time you were alone with Price. He was always kind of intimidating to you, the reason why you guys actually never spent more alone time together. He was much older that's for sure so you felt like he didn't have much respect for you because you were a lot younger than him and constantly got yourself in trouble.

You reminded yourself of the times when he stared at you differently. Soap and you were getting back from training, talking about of how you both could improve and roasting each other a bit. Price was getting coffee in the kitchen when you walked in, passing by him.

"Ay Cap. Good morning"

"Good morning Captain."

"Good morning Soap" Price said while taking a sip of his coffee. "And morning y/n" He said changing his expression completely, almost mumbling while passing by you two.

You weren't confused, because it wasn't the first time he acted like that towards you. But you were pretty sure in that moment he didn't like you that much.

And yet here you were. In a car alone with him, trying to find the nearest hotel you can both sleep over in so you could continue the mission in the morning.

"You cold?" Price's sudden voice pulled you out of your thoughts.

"Ah, no I'm okay." You said with a nervous smile, turning your head back to the window trying to avoid his gaze.

Silence filled the air once again until you spoke up, trying to get rid of the akwardness between the two of you.

"Did uh, Gaz call?"

"Yes. He's still settled up with Laswell somewhere safe. We didn't exchange locations for security measures, but if something happens i'll let you know." Price said as he kept looking at the road in front of him, a bright sign slowly appearing close to us that said 'MOTEL'.

"Okay, good" You answered as Price turned slightly left nearing the Motel and parking in front of it.

---

You carried your bag as Price went in front of you, going up to the register. He talked to a woman working there asking for rooms as you looked around. The Motel wasn't anything fancy, but you would rather settle in a motorists hotel than somewhere on the street or some crappy old safe house.

It was pretty quiet inside of the Motel. But as you glanced at behind the register you could see just a few more keys on the key stand. Not paying much attention to it you walked around the lobby slowly, playing with the ends of your hair.

"Y/N, let's go." Price called out for you as he held up the keys in the air signalling to the elevator.

You both got inside, Price clicking number '3' as the low hum of the elevator going up could be the only sound you hear.

When you got to the door, Price unlocked it. Moving to the side he mumbled a quiet "after you" as you walked inside of the room, turning the lights on you stopped in your tracks.

You were definietly confused for a second, because at the right side of the wall you could only see one queen sized bed. Looking around, there was only a door to the left were you assumed was the bathroom, in front of the bed was a dresser and on top of it a small TV, as well as the door leading to the terrace.

"Uh, Captain did you order a queen sized bedroom on purpose or?" You said as you turned around to meet his gaze. Price was entering the room right as you turned around holding his bags.

"What are you talking about?-" Price said as he finally got next to you, realising that what you said was true. The beds weren't seperated, it was just one big bed perfectly fitted for a married couple or...worse.

"Um, I'll go downstairs and check with the receptionist." You said as you turned around leaving the room.

You knew it wasn't intentional, but the thought of sleeping in the same bed with Price made your palms sweat and your head hurt. Not because of him, you trusted Price more than you trusted yourself. It's because you were nervous. Nervous about the fact that you could share a bed with a man, and the last time you did that you trusted one too easily.

The elevator doors opened as you stepped inside the lobby again.

"Oh, hello again is everything alright?" The woman behind the reception called out.

"Actually not really. My uh- friend asked for a room with two single beds, and you gave us one with a queen sized bed."

"Oh I'm so sorry! But unfortunately we don't have any more single beds available."

"Not even one with a pull out, or a chair or anything?" Your voice was high pitched, while you awkwardly held your hands on top of the register. Hoping that she could have anything you asked for.

"I'm so sorry, we don't. If you came maybe a bit earlier we could've given you even two seperate rooms, but as you can see it's our busiest time of the year." The woman looked around, the christmas lights and a bright big colorful tree at the corner of the lobby showing that she had a point.

"Alright, uhm- could you sent extra pillows to our room by any chance?"

"Of course! And we're sorry again, I hope you have a good nights rest."

You hoped so too.

---

The door clicked shut behind you, Price was standing by the end of the bed, searching through his bag. He turned his head around at the sound of the door closing.

You sighed, throwing the pillows that you got on the floor as you sat next to him on the edge of the bed.

"They don't have any other rooms available."

Price hummed, continuing to search through his bag once again. Your back connected with the bed as you kicked your feet, huffing at a few strands of your hair.

"Soo what are we gonna do now?"

"I'm going to go take a shower." Price said as he finally took some stuff from his duffle bag and left the room. The sound of the water coming from the shower head draining your thoughts away as you got up a bit, propping yourself on the bed with your hands.

"Don't worry darling, I'm not gonna hurt you."

The line coming to your head, reminding you of what could happen again. You got up from the bed immiediately stripping down from your clothes, taking the time while Price wasn't in the room to undress and take a few pillows to make your own bed on the floor.

You rushed to the light switch to turn the lights off, the only light source now peeking through the bathroom doors. Quickly getting yourself on the ground you closed your eyes shut, pretending to sleep so Price wouldn't protest, if he even would.

The sound of the water stopped and some shuffling was heard from inside of the bathroom as the door finally opened after a few minutes.

It was quiet at first, Price stood at the bathroom entrance confused, seeing your sleeping figure on the floor. He sighed as he got closer, inhaling a bit, he wanted to say something. Tell you you shouldn't sleep on the floor when there's a perfectly good bed next to you. To tell you an old man like him should be asleep on the floor, not you. To tell you you were safe with him, and that you can trust your Captain enough to sleep next to him.

But he didn't wanna wake you up. As much as he wanted to, he knew how tired you were. Reminding himself a few hours earlier how your head would drop every few seconds in the car but yet you wouldn't let yourself sleep.

So he got in the bed, dissapointed in himself of how he didn't say earlier that he should be the one sleeping on the floor.

---

You were squirming.

That's right. It was so fucking uncomfortable to sleep on the floor. Surprisingly it wasn't your first time, there were worse places that you've slept in. But the hard wood floor was killing your back, and it suddenly got extremely cold as you didn't have any blankets with you.

You got up quietly peeking up at the bed, the only light source you had was from the moonlight and some street lights outside, seeing Price soundly asleep as he lightly snored. Standing up slowly, you sneaked towards your duffle bag pulling a sweatshirt from it and putting it over the t shirt you were currently wearing.

You knew that you wouldn't be able to sleep tonight as you glanced at your watch on your wrist, seeing that it was 3:08 am. So you took your pack of cigarettes out of your jacket pocket and headed out to the terrace. The cool air instantly hitting your face as you quietly tried to open the door from the terrace.

You sat on the plastic chair that was close to the railing. Lighting down your cigarette, you took a big puff out from it.

"What, you think I'll try something with you just because you're a woman? You're funny."

"But I didn't even mention you'd try anything.."

"I know. But that's what most women think so I just wanted to clarify."

"Um yeah, you're right. Silly me." You answered as you fidgeted with your hands, standing at the edge of the bed.

"Well? Come on. Get in the bed."

You hesitated for a second as you finally got under the covers, laying so close to the edge to try and not make any physical touch.

Not expecting for him to actually pull you in, holding you by your waist.

You cringed at the memory, not wanting to think about it any further, but the past resurfacing because this exact same thing happened to you once before.

You were even younger back then, not knowing what to do in the situation or if it was right or wrong.

"You shouldn't have worn those shorts to bed."

It wasn't your fault, right?

Sniffing, you used the sleeve from your sweater to wipe down the tears.

"You're awake."

You gasped at the sudden voice, turning around you placed your palm on your chest where your heart was and saw Price leaning at the doorway to the terrace.

"Captain, you scared the shit out of me."

"And you scared the shit out of me. Why the hell are you awake y/n." Price said as he sat on the plastic chair that was next to you.

"Sorry Captain, it was too uncomfortable to sleep on the floor.."

"So why didn't ya' wake me up?"

"What, why?" You looked at him, shaking your head a bit. The cigarette already burning out.

"Because I should be the one sleeping on the floor."

You stayed quiet, still looking at each other.

"And you've been crying, so clearly there's something more than just an uncomfortable floor." Price sighed as he looked away from you, gazing at the stars.

To be honest, you didn't know what to say. Because you couldn't say that you didn't trust your Captain and that it was just your stupid imagination that thought you could get hurt again.

"Captain, please go back to sleep."

"I'm not leaving until you go to bed." Price said as he leaned more in the chair.

"You can't do this, you can't- do this to me right now." You said, your voice stuttering a bit.

Price turned around to look at you and stayed quiet for a moment.

"I don't want you to lose your sleep because of me Captain."

"Fine, then let's both sleep in the bed." Price said finally as he stood up not looking back at you.

"Wait! No, I don't wanna- do that." You said as you stood up, your voice dying out at the end as Price turned around to look at you. His expression changing, as if he was intrigued by your statement.

"May I ask why, sergeant."

You glanced around the room, not daring to meet his gaze again as you rubbed the palms of your hands onto your sides.

"Do I have to say, why?"

Price looked at you as he let his hands fall to his sides, his gaze softening.

"Nevermind I'll just sleep on the floor-" You passed by him as Price took your arm stopping you in your tracks.

"Y/N..you know that I wouldn't let anything happen to you, and I most certainly wouldn't do it myself."

You looked at him again, his face showing that he meant every word.

Price looked around for a second, seeing the pillows on the floor he let go of your arm and placed three pillows in the middle of the bed, seperating both sides.

"Are you,- comfortable with this?" You blinked, not knowing what to say. Finally nodding your head as you stepped on the other side of the bed.

Hesitantly, you took the covers and got in the bed. Price doing the same as you felt him lay down next to you. Your breath hitched as you stared at the ceiling, glancing at your side where one pillow was you couldn't see his face. You slightly gripped the pillow and moved it to your side hugging it, Price's face now being clear.

"Is this okay?" Price asked as you nodded at his question.

"Thank you, Captain."

"Price. Please call me Price you're making me feel old."

You huffed a laughter, a small smile forming on your face.

"Thank you, Price."

Price smiled at you as he closed his eyes, you doing the same.

Not even expecting to sleep better than you have in a while.

[b0n3s-is-gay]

Falling for your love: Chapter 1

Tags: mentions of religion, fallen angel, forbiden love, Demon Simeon, fluffy angst, GN! Reader

Synopsis: Simeon wants to love his beloved human but cannot without falling. So he questions the word of his leader and wonders about something: Love or his status?

~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~

Rules, laws, and god is all that Simeon has known for the past thousands of years. He never saw a problem with those rules and laws until he saw another angel get killed during a war for loving a mortal. He even saw his only brother figure fall. He stood by the laws but he questioned them everyday.

Now he stood infront of the Lord of Devildom with his young angel companion and two humans. His heart was pounding in his throat and ears. He tried to look anywhere but the king but his eyes stopped on one of the two humans. They looked at the Lord with the confidence of a thousand soldiers.

He'd only seen that confidence in two people, his mentor Lucifer and the demon Lord infront of him. He loved to see that this human was so dead set on doing something. What that something is, he would never know.

"Luke, Simeon, and Solomon will be staying in Purgatory Hall while Y/n will be staying in the House of Lametation with the seven demon brothers." The mighty Demon Lord bellowed out in a strong voice that shook the angels and Solomon. The smaller human didn't even blink as the stronger demons looked down on them as the Lord's voice shook.

After the Demon lord finished speaking, the exchange students walked to their respective areas so they can start to settle down before school. Simeon's eyes could not leave the smaller student that stood infront of the seven rulers of the underworld.

"Simeon, come on. We have to get to Puratory Hall so we can start settiling in before we start school tommorow." Luke said to the older angel as he grabbed onto the angels gloved hand. Simeon just looked down at the younger angel as he started walking. He may not be looking at the confident student but his mind is still by their side.

"Simeon, what are you thinking about?" The socerer asked the distracted angel. He looked at the white-haired wonder and shrugged as he kept walking down the road to their new home till they went their seperate ways back to their own realms and kingdoms.

"Are you two ready to see our new home till we head back to our own realms after the semesters are over?" Simeon said while trying to change the subject and hoping that it'll get his mind away from the other student that he hadn't been introduced to yet.

"I just hope it's livable, I bet demons don't even know how to live." Luke said while looking at the large doors that stood tall infront of the trio. Simeon looked at the younger angel with a look of dissaprovement. "Luke, 7 of those demons were angels, they fought for their sister who was killed for loving a mortal man."

Simeon opened the door and lead the two other people into the hall so they could see where they would be living for the next couple of years. Simeon didn't really care what his room looked like so long as he had a bed to sleep in, a place to pray, and a desk to work at.

"Good night others, I feel absolutely tired from the trip to devildom. Have a good rest of your night." Simeon said as he walked to his room that was marked just for him. He opened the door and saw his semi-simplistic room where he would spend his nights while in Devildom.

What a strange human he encountered today. Hopefully he'll get a chance to speak to them more before his time in Devildom ends. He found them quite nice on the eyes , he just hoped that he won't have the same fate as her.

Simeon even felt sick even thinking her name made him feel sick with guilt, he could have helpt them but he didn't so he could save his own skin. "I was such a cowerd back then I should've helped them... I don't even know what it's like to be in a situation like that."

Simeon dropped on his bed and fell asleep for the night, Tommorow would mark his first day in Devildom.

[thefisherqueen]

Granada's Sherlock Holmes: The mazarin stone

I feel like the ghost of Jeremy Brett is starting to possess me by watching so much of the Granada series lately. I even dreamt of him last night, lol. Might be better for my inner peace to take a break, but nah, being normal about something is overrated, so tonight I'm watching The mazarin stone. An outlier in the canon stories for having only one act, for being almost all dialogue and for taking place entirely within Baker Street. From what I read, this is all because it is an adaption from a screen play. I quite enjoyed this story with its great dialogue and think it would work even better in a visual medium, so I'm very curious to see the Granada version.

So this episode starts with Holmes talking about obsession and being haunted by a ghost. Feels relevant to my currant state

The opening scene is an prologue to the canon story then, with Holmes telling Watson he'll be away for several weeks. Watson will be lonely :( Watson's patients will be glad :)

Holmes saying he will be watching Watson with his third eye. Ehm, sir? Interesting storytelling choice

Such dramatic music in the scene where the diamond gets stolen, it's making me laugh

Not sure why those ladies in Watson's practice are here, but I love them. What a comic duo. It appears that Watson is struggling to figure out why they are there as well. Wait. Garridebs? I guess this episode is loaning some material from that story, then. That makes sense because I imagine it would be hard to fill a full episode with just the Mazarin story

Ladies, after some hipster nonsense of not being able to be ill because of their habits: "We insist that all our gentlemen do the same." Watson: "...your gentlemen?" *trying hard not to judge* Ladies: "Our gentlemen tennants" Haha, love this scene. I did spent some time before thinking about how awkward victorian doctor's consults must have been, with all those societal norms of modesty. I bet Watson would be really good at putting his patients at ease, though

Oh no, let Mycroft sleep! He certainly did not deserve such a rude awakening. Rude man talking to Mycroft: "You must keep your brother on a shorter leash" I feel like getting into a fist fight with that man on behalf of Holmes. Do not talk about my man like that

Mycroft is taking on the case? Was Jeremy Brett not available for this full episode? Because of health reasons, maybe? All right, that's a fresh development, let's see how it goes

I love the strong visual storytelling of the count actually shooting at female figurines when Mycroft confronts him

This episode is an interesting interpretation of each character's different way of investigation. Mycroft uses his network to speak to people and gain access to places he can follow the count, Watson stays polite and pretents to be quite ignorant while secretly thinking on it and gathering information from documents, while I think Holmes usually does everything the other two do but adds a lot of hands-on examination and a trick or two

Mycroft flirting with the ladies Garridebs threw me off. I guess this series has so many queer vibes that I didn't expect that level of straightness

I actually really like getting to see Mycroft and Watson working together. I do miss being able to stare unnecessary long at Jeremy Brett, of course

Just a side note, but the two sisters sleeping in one bed is an interesting detail. Besides houses historically commonly being small, in part because of heating reasons, bedding used to be very expensive; I would have to do research to say anything specific, but I do know from museum visits that it was quite common until at least the start of the 20th century for siblings to share a bed and thus save the family on cost. It would make sense for two unmarried elderly sisters to still be sleeping together if they got used to it after their whole lives doing so, even in the case they could now afford seperate beds, rooms maybe even. I think no one would have frowned if Holmes and Watson themselves would have shared a room. It was common for the lower classes and just didn't have the sexual/romantic association it does today. Which begs the question: what did cause victorians to become suspecious a sexual same-sex relationship was going on? I would be delighted if anyone could tell me more. I have just brought 'Strangers: homosexual love in the nineteenth century' by Graham Robb, so I hope I'll soon learn more

Watson still gets wounded in the confrontation, I see. And by that nastly looking diamond cleaver. Ouch. What a shame we didn't get the emotional 'It was worth a wound' scene. I LOVE however that it is the sisters who save Watson when he got that knife pulled to his throat. You go, ladies! And Mycroft in interrogating mode is quite delightful

Mycroft... in multiple bodies? Being immortal? Is the count hallucinating? What is going on???

Holmes is proud of his brother. Aww :)

This was a enjoyable episode, all in all. Of course I missed Holmes/Jeremy Brett in this, but even without the main character there it was still a good story, great acting and beautiful scene building. Just a bit of a shame for the odd paranormal (???) bits at the very start and end. They felt out of place and were unnecessary for the episode to work

[theflyingfeeling]

"#no but seriously WHERE are all the BC in a shared flat in los angeles fics?? WHERE#i could come up with a plethora of plot ideas at command if that's what it takes!!"

can I have a plot idea? maybe the added pressure of "someone gave this to me" will make me actually write something for once ☠

Apart from all the Olli/Allu headcanons, here's a few I just came up with off the top of my head, with various ships:

Jetlagged Joel wandering to the kitchen in the middle of the night to find a snack, but instead he finds Niko (also jetlagged) and they end up having an emotional talk, reflecting on the past two years: everything that's changed in all of their lives, how far they've come as a band and how far they're still gonna go 🥺 The others find the two of them in the morning, having fallen asleep on the couch in each others arms 💕

The BC Cali house doesn't have a pool (they really wanted a pool, but then Tommi took a look at the BC bank account and told them they don't need one). However, upon arriving at their rented house for the first time, they immediately notice their next door neighbour has one 👀 Being antisocial Finns, none of them don't need to go for a swim that much that they would go and knock on the pool neighbour's door and politely invite themselves for a brisk dip (since they have come all the way from the far north where there's eternal winter and all the bodies of water are frozen at all times, and besides it would be far too dangerous with all the polar bears and killer seals), but then, on one of their morning walks around the block, they ran into their neigbour across the street (they stop to pet her dog), and they're told that the pool neighbour is on a vacation abroad and won't be coming home until after Christmas. 4/5 of them think nothing of it, but Aleksi's menacing brain is immediately intrigued 😏 later that day, when everyone else has already retreated to their bedrooms, Aleksi knocks on Joonas' door and asks him if he wants to do something crazy 🤭 and of course Joonas does, especially if it includes nudity 😌 up to you to decide how the story continues!💦

And let us not forget the classic: from the pictures they saw of the house, there was definitely supposed to be 5 beds. Joel had looked at the pictures many times, and clearly there were TWO rooms, one with three single beds (although one of them seems to be dwarf-sized), and another with a wider bed that Joel was SURE was just two single beds pushed together. Porko is happy to share (because of course he is), but Joel is determined to sleep in the living room, on the scruffy leather sofa that is very obviously way too small for him. After a few nights of stubbornly trying to make himself comfortable on the tiny (and sort of smelly) sofa, Joel finally gives in and joins Joonas and Mr. Pork (the pig plushie) in the master bedroom. Maybe waking up to Joonas playing with Joel's hair is not the worst fate after all...

Next I'm asking you to humour me a little and imagine they could afford a place with seperate bedrooms for everyone. And because Olli/Allu is the cutest ship that ever was, let's imagine them claiming bedrooms next to each other. And then imagine them just staying up in the other's bedroom talking about important stuff (the new songs, the cute dog they saw earlier when they went grocery shopping). And neither of them wanting the other to go to their own bedroom, but they're both too shy and insecure to suggest they share the bed, just for tonight. Olli loitering at the doorframe until he can't come up with anything new to say, and finally dragging himself to his bedroom, mentally kicking himself for being such a coward (Aleksi does the same after Olli has closen the door). Olli being about to turn off the bedside light when he hears a faint knock on the wall by his bed (the wall he shares with Allu). I'd ask you to imagine them coming up with a secret knocking code to communicate with each night after saying goodnight, but that would be way too cute and sappy, wouldn't it? 🥺 Not to mention Olli trying to figure out how to spell "I love you" with the knocking code 💕

To jump into a completely different kind of vibe with no transition whatsover: the house is great alright, but it appears the lock on the bathroom door is not working 🤔 This, however, they don't notice, until Olli - still half asleep - is about to go take a leak the first thing in the morning, and ends up walking in on Joel having is morning wank shower 😳 It's all kinda awkward for a moment, and Joel's climax enjoying-the-nice-hot-shower face (you know the one) is now imprinted on Olli's brain and he doesn't know what to do about it 😩 (somehow, walking in on people in the bathroom becomes his "things" during their stay (perhaps because he keeps forgetting about the malfunctioning lock after every nights' sleep); one morning he runs into Joonas blowing Niko under the shower 😐 another morning he catches a glimpse of that juicy Kaunisvesi peach 🍑👀 he's not a perv though, it just keeps happening! 😬)

[risebto]

Blood is Thicker than Ooze | Chapter Two

Word Count: 2279 Warnings: Bad Parent Draxum, Hurt Donatello, Unreliable narrator, Psychological abuse, Seperated Donnie AU Description: Purple is the son of Draxum, a great warrior alchemist. With his help, Draxum will eradicate the prophesied human threat, and restore yōkai to the surface. Purple doesn't understand why these three turtles are trying to stop them.

Navigation | Previous | Next

Purple looked at the blueprints hung up on his wall once more, and glanced back at his contraption. It looked just like it, with the addition of a scope. Two nights ago, Father had left the plans for a gun able to shoot a web-like substance just outside his door. Since then, he’d worked tirelessly to complete it, even halting work on Shelldon. This was a priority. It was for Big Mama, who had made a deal with Father. He didn’t know the fine details of the deal exactly, but he knew his part to play, and he’d completed it.

A wicked idea came to mind as he held the gun in his hands, and he grinned maliciously. He pushed himself off the floor and made his way to the living room of the large house, finding both Huginn and Muninn sleeping soundly in their dog bed. Why they weren’t on his father’s shoulders he didn’t know, seeing as that was literally the biggest (and only) part of their job, but he didn’t care right now. Standing just before the entrance of the living room, Purple used the scope of the gun to aim at Huginn, before pressing the trigger. Immediately, the gun shot the web-like substance out, and trapped Huginn to the bed. The recoil was jarring, but not unlike the other guns he’d held before. Just a bit stronger. 

Huginn woke up from the shot, and immediately tried to get up. But he was struggling to get out of the trap, the webs strong enough to pin him down. “What? Ew, what is this shit!?” He tried to maneuver his body out, his wings flapping in a desperate attempt before he gave up with an exasperated sigh. 

Muninn woke up, too, and poked the webs with a finger suspiciously. His eyes narrowed, before he shrugged. He turned to see Purple in the doorway, and tilted his head in curiosity. “What’s that?”

“It’s a web-gun,” Purple said proudly, holding it up in the air for the gargoyle to see. “Father asked me to create it for a deal with Big Mama.”

“Ooh, in exchange for the imperium?” Muninn asked, before glancing back to his friend, who was still stuck in the webs. Huginn glared at him, and Muninn smiled apologetically. “Also, uh, is there a way to unweb Huginn?”

“Empyrean, and probably,” Purple corrected before he shrugged dismissively, turning his back to them. “Good luck with that,” he chuckled to himself, and began to walk off without a care before he saw his father standing behind him, staring down at him, before the large yōkai glanced down at the gun in the turtle mutant’s hands. 

“Father!” Purple said in surprise, cowering in on himself slightly just from the shock of seeing him there. “What a surprise! And a coincidence!”

His father hummed in amusement as he looked past him and towards Huginn. Purple craned his neck around to see the two gargoyles struggling to get him out of the trap, and failing, by the looks of it. “I see you’ve completed your part of Big Mama’s bargain?” 

“I have!” Purple exclaimed excitedly, holding up his machine in triumph. His father took it from his hands carefully, looking at it with curiosity. He turned it over in his hands, inspecting it closely. “I even added a scope! It wasn’t on the instructions, but I thought, ‘Hey! Why not go above and beyond’? So I did!” Purple added, rambling a bit. As soon as he realized that he was rambling, he stopped talking and bit his tongue.

Father held the gun up, looking through the scope. He looked at the room through the scope’s lens, before stopping. Purple was about to ask if he’d done something wrong, before the trigger of the gun was pulled and an unsuspecting Muninn was hit. Now, both gargoyles were stuck to the dog bed.

Father lowered the gun, nodding in approval at the craftsmanship of his son. “This will certainly do. Thank you, Purple.” He patted his son's head, and began to make his way towards the exit. 

Anxiety pulsed in Purple’s chest as his father walked away, and he quickly followed close behind him. “Is there anything else I can do?” He asked, keeping pace with his father eagerly. “Anything that needs to be done?”

Father stopped, tilting his head in contemplation before nodding slightly. “Indeed there is. I need a few chemicals to complete my Mutagen.” 

“I can go to the Hidden City Science Market,” Purple suggested happily. “What do you need?”

“That would be helpful. I need… Ethyl methanesulfonate, Helicobacter pylori, and nitroindole,” Father listed off with a thoughtful expression. “Thank you, Purple. What would I do without you?” 

Purple didn’t respond, mostly because he couldn’t take compliments all that well. “I’ll do my best, Father. I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

“Very good. I have much work to complete in the lab,” with that, Father left Purple alone in the hallway. Dread filled Purple as he realized what he’d just volunteered for: social interaction. The bane of his existence. He could stand talking to his father and the gargoyles, but interaction beyond them was always uncomfortable and awkward. He never knew what to say, what made them tick. He knew that Huginn found insult humor amusing, but he’d tried it with a total stranger once, and they thought he was being an asshole. Which was honestly fair for them to assume. He sighed, resigning himself to his fate. 

“Is anyone gonna help?!” Huginn shrieked. The loud noise caused him to flinch, but his success in annoying them made him feel a little better.

Purple stood just outside the Scientist’s Market, his dread for this mission only increasing as he stared at the crowd of yōkai around the stalls. It intimidated Purple, and the urge to just turn tail and go back home was strong. Instead, he took a deep breath and pushed forwards, entering the market. 

This wasn’t the first time he’d been to this part of the Hidden City. Despite its name, “City” was probably an inaccurate term for the home the yōkai had made for themselves. There were many subsections of the Hidden City, like the Witch Town or the Pirate’s Cove. The Pirate’s Cove held many, many criminals such as Big Mama and Draxum. Due to this, Father often avoided wandering out of the Pirate’s Cove, lest he be imprisoned for his “crimes” against humanity.

But Purple (and the goyles) wasn’t tied to his father’s “wrongdoings”, and was able to traverse the entirety of the Hidden City without much trouble. There was no doubt that Draxum would be able to escape the clutches of the incompetent Hidden City police force, but Father never liked the hassle it brought him. Therefore, Purple was often sent on errands outside of the Pirate’s Cove, like the Docks- or the Scientist’s Market.

It was a beautiful sight, Purple would have to admit. Stalls advertising priceless inventions or materials (human and yōkai alike) drew him in, the temptation of seeing each and every stall pulling at his little scientific heart. But he shook his head, pushed away the thoughts of taking a gander at the holographic equipment, and continued on. He couldn’t get off task. He was there for three things, and three things only: Ethyl methanesulfonate, Helicobacter pylori, and nitroindole. 

A crude tent set up with a foldout table caught his attention, as it stood out from the rest. Many other stalls at least had some color to them, or some sort of professional feel or setup. But instead, this one was bland and simple. A small paper taped to the top of the tent read “CHEAP CHEMICALS”. Purple was wary of the small setup, but found his way to it anyways. The worst that could happen is that he went to another stall for chemicals instead of here.

At the folding table was a yōkai that looked similar to a rat. She wore a lab coat and goggles, and her ears twitched in excitement as Purple strolled up to the stall. “A customer!” She exclaimed, leaning over the table as her tail waved in the air. “What are you looking for, kid?”

“I’m 14- not a kid,” Purple said bluntly, uncomfortable by her eagerness. “I’m looking for Ethyl methanesulfonate, Helicobacter pylori, and nitroindole,” he recited, nearly robotic in the way he’d said it. I have to get it right. One wrong ingredient could jeopardize the whole thing!

The rat nodded enthusiastically, before turning her back to him and rummaging through a cooler. Her tail flicked in the air as she did so. She grabbed two bottles, one labeled Ethyl Methanesulfonate and the other Helicobacter Pylori. She pushed them on the table, and used her tail to close the cooler behind her. “You’re gonna have to be more specific about the nitroindole, my turtle friend.” 

“Both 5 and 6,” Purple said, scratching his arms anxiously. Which one did Father want? Will he get mad if I spend money on both just in case? I should’ve asked for clarification…

She raised her brow curiously, her tail twitching in interest. “Is this for a science project? What are you usin’ these for?” She sounded dubious- of his knowledge, or his intelligence?

“None of your business,” Purple said, a little upset by the idea that she might be questioning his ability to use the chemicals he was asking for. “I know what I’m talking about. 5-Nitroindole and 6-Nitroindole. I need both of them. I can write out the molecular formula and structural formula of both of them.”

She raised her hands in defense, nodding in understanding. She turned back around and put both of the variations of Nitroindole on the table. “Got it, got it. Just be safe with these. This all comes out to… two hundred.” 

“Two hundred?” He repeated, and looked down at the chemicals on the table. There didn’t seem to be anything wrong with them, and they weren’t small bottles, either. They should cost over six hundred, easily. “Only two hundred?”

“I promised cheap chemicals, didn’t I?” She said with a toothy smile, her tail pointing towards the sign. “I believe in a more accessible world of science. Finances often get in the way of advancement in the field.” 

“That and magic users,” Purple grumbled to himself, but the rat either didn’t hear him or didn’t care, because she was still looking at him expectantly. He sighed and placed the money on the table, sliding it gently towards her before she grabbed it hungrily. He took the chemicals, and released the shell from his back. It was painted dark purple and had spikes along the back, where his spine might be. Many of his other shells served specific functions like a jetpack or mechanical arms, and this one was purely made for storage during trips like this. 

He set the shell down on the floor, opened its hatch, and placed the bottles securely in spots where they wouldn’t get damaged, closed the hatch, and placed it back onto his back. 

“That’s nifty, that thing you got there,” The rat lady said, leaning against her table with a hint of intrigue in her eyes. “What happened to your shell, though? Looks like ya got into a nasty fight or somethin’ to make it that deformed.”

“My shell’s fine,” He said hesitantly. Biologically, it was fine. But he knew how weak it made him- how exposed and vulnerable he was without his artificial shell. It made his skin itch with anxiety. “Thanks,” He said, standing there a bit awkwardly. He was used to conversations ending when his Father wanted it to end. It was always odd with others, seeing as he was the one in charge of ending the conversation rather than them. “See you later,” he said awkwardly. 

“Yeah. Good luck with your science,” She said, turning her back to him to place the money in some makeshift register. 

“Y-you too,” Purple said, immediately cringing from it. Before she could turn around, he quickly sped off, hoping and praying that he would forget this interaction soon enough. 

Father was going to be so happy and proud of him for getting them- and for such a low price!

“Purple.” 

The boom of Father’s voice could be heard throughout the house, Purple was sure of it. He wasn’t yelling- not really. His voice was just loud and powerful, and made Purple want to hide in his shell for a million years, and then some. But he wasn’t yelling. Draxum didn’t yell. 

His creator stood in front of him, clutching both 5-Nitroindole and 6-Nitroindole in his hands, cracking the glass bottle that held the substances. The frustration and anger was evident by the yōkai’s face, his lips drawn into a nasty snarl.

“I- You never said to get nitroaniline,” Purple insisted, watching as the liquid began to seep from the cracked glass and spill onto his father’s gloved arms before dripping onto the floor. “You said nitroindole. I remember you saying nitroindole. Not nitroaniline”

“I know what I said- I was the one who said it, afterall,” Draxum retorted, his grip tightening. “I asked for nitroaniline. We have plenty of nitroindole here already- why would I ask for a substance we have an abundance of?!”

Purple scratched his arms anxiously. He should’ve realized that. He knew they had nitroindole- why had he gotten more? He should’ve brought this up when Father first asked for it. “I don’t know,” Purple admitted, his voice low with regret. “I remember you saying nitroindole.”

“Huginn?” Father called upon the gargoyle, who sat perched on his shoulder. The yōkai nodded to Draxum, his wings flapping a bit in response. “Do you recall what I said this morning?” 

“You said nitroaniline, sir,” Huginn reported, glancing at Purple with a mix of sympathy and smugness. 

Did he? Purple wondered, trying to replay the conversation in his mind, but he couldn’t remember his exact words. He could hear him saying nitroindole easily, but he could also hear him saying nitroaniline easily. The two substances were so close in name… “It was a simple mistake,” Purple explained, trying to find a reason for his error. He hadn’t done it on purpose- he’d never try to sabotage his Father’s work. “It won’t happen again. I’m sorry.”

“I don’t want your meaningless apologies,” Father narrowed his eyes, his eyes holding a sense of disappointment that made the guilt only fester and grow in Purple’s gut. “You always do this- you always say ‘I’m sorry’ for every little thing. I can never know if you actually understand the weight of your mistake this time or if you’re just feeding me another lie about your remorse. Which is it, Purple?” 

“I do- I’m sorry,” Purple insisted, silently begging for this to end. He knew he messed up- he knew he got the wrong chemical. He knew it was his fault. He should’ve asked for clarification, he should’ve known they already had nitroindole, he should’ve written it down, he should've done so much more. His eyes stung as tears threatened his composure. Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Please don’t cry. “Tomorrow- tomorrow I’ll go back and get the right one,” he promised. 

“Of course you will,” Father said coldly. He snorted, as if he was offended by his willingness to go back. “You’re not doing something amazing by fixing your mistake.”

Purple felt his legs shake violently and the tears began to fall. His face felt hot with embarrassment and guilt, and he wiped his face, wishing he could stop his crying. Why are you crying? There’s nothing to cry about.

“I’m sorry,” Purple repeated, his voice thick with both remorse and guilt. “I’m really, really sorry, Fath… Father. I misheard you. I’m so sorry. It won’t happen again. I promise it won’t happen again. I’m sorry.”

Father’s features softened as Purple rambled on, and he placed the cracked glass bottles down, removing his gloves in the process. He embraced Purple, holding him close to his chest.

The hug was warm and comforting, something that Purple desperately needed in that moment and that Draxum gave to him. “Thank you for your apology, Purple,” Father said softly, pulling away after a moment. He was much taller than Purple, being a sort of pillar and shield for the teenager. He used a hand to cup Purple’s cheek, wiping away a stray tear. Purple leaned into the touch, and looked up at his Father with red, puffy eyes. 

Father’s gaze was soft and sincere, a fond smile on his face as he looked down at his son. 

“I forgive you.”

[maolong]

Saying Goodbye to my cat, Misty

Today is unfortunately the day that we're going to have to put my cat down. She's 14 now, and she's lived a good life, but it still feels like there's so much more left for her to live.

I still remember when we first met her, there's a number of shelters around the area including the general one as well as an animal rescue facility outside the normal shelter system that we'd ended up working with. After one of our two cats, molly and old cat with long fur who'se heart gave out before her spirit did, died, we'd decided we would get another one or two from them. It was a nice place, with small rooms where cats were allowed to roam around and play with each other in all seperated by age range. There's something funny about the fact that if I'd had my way we wouldn't have gotten you Misty. My family had issues finding a cat that they felt meshed with everyone, but there had been three that I'd managed to connect with prior to us meeting you. One was a talkative Siamese cat who's brother had been adopted, one was a gentle tortoise shell who no matter who was in the room only seemed to want to spend time with me, and the last was a loving big fur ball who'd at one time slept on my sister and I at the same time. His name, was Puff and we'd been thinking of getting him around the time that you moved rooms from the ones with the smallest kittens to ones who were a few months old. However someone else had bought him first, it was close, a matter of hours. But it's thanks to that you managed to get the other boys into your life.

You probably don't remember this, but at the Shelter you were called Star and were quite active. You'd still had your spunky streak going then, and now that you're old and I can see the pain from Arthritis in your movements and hear the raspy breathing brought on by your asthma I can still see that spirit in you that had attracted us to you. We had purchased you with two boys, Matthew and Bear (Though none of you kept those names) and ended up staying in my siblings room as all three of you adopted to life at our house. My sibling spent almost a month sleeping downstairs on the fold out couch while our old boy got the run of the house, you three spent longer in there then we'd intended because whenever you were let out Matthew would often times go after Nicholas (The old one) and try to play with poor nicky. It was around that time you got your name, Misty, from how you moved. Silent as the mists rolling in, and just as ever present as the mists on a cold day. You'd show up whenever you wanted something from us, and we'd do our best to help you get it. And eventually, the troublesome kids that we were, this included freedom. Despite the trouble it'd casue each time, my sibling and I would intentionally release you three now Misty, Shadow, and Pounce, to let you run about the house. Eventually one day, you decided you didn't want to go back in. And we accepted.

I know during that time you were jealous of Nicky, how couldn't you be? He recieved Lettuce and hot dogs, roast chicken, he had his own water bowl and litterbox, and rooms of the house that we wouldn't let you in. And even then he was allowed to go outside when you weren't! But all that came to an end a few months later. I know you missed him, all three of you, from how you walked around the house looking in his hiding places meowing at the table seats he'd take to be fed at and looking outside at the spots he'd slept as if he'd be there. We know we'd hung onto him for too long, and I believe my parents feared and still do that the same would happen to you. His body had begun to fail him when he was put down, and in many ways on the day he died it was the most reassuring day because after all the suffering he had gone to he still had it in him to on that last cold November day he still had it in him to fall asleep purring happily on my dad's shoulder after he'd been taken into the outside world one last time.

After he passed away, thankfully peacefully, we were distraught. Us kids hadn't been informed that he was going to be put down soon, and the day it happened was a school day of which we were informed on the way back. And I know that you as kittens sat around his body respectfully. It was a mixture of grief, confusion, and despair. We hadn't known this was happening, to young to know the signs that he was in constant pain at 19, and in many ways I'd believed he could live forever. We ended up seeking out comfort in the three of you, now the last three cats in the house. Pounce, and Shadow were far more receptive to it than you were, you always did have your defiant streaks. But you were still wiling to serve as our little girl. While we were all having issues during this time, you'd had more then once.

You weren't even two when your anxiety got the better of you and you began cleaning your tail to the point that you would clean away the skin. It was always troubling, but I remember clear as day the night when we got back home and you had cleaned so far that bone was showing. It wasn't memorable because of the shock of seeing it. I don't even recall that, I remember how you had run all through the house with blood falling from your tail dripping it on everything and spraying it everywhere you went. Who knew a kitten could have so much blood! To this day we're still finding specks of blood from this all around the house. Just in June I found a new patch in my bedroom where you must have run and hid. But we were able to get you help, though you didn't appreciate it at first. Fighting so you wouldn't have to take your meds and I remember how at some point you had hated wearing the cone so much that we had to exchange it for an inflatable blue ring decorated with daisies. You wore this for so long, and while you had your issues with it, it helped you heal and eventually when it came off you became the only one of the cats to wear a collar. We had a few that you'd wear. One was pink, another purple but eventually you'd stop wearing them.

When I was still young, and you were still small you weren't as cuddely then as you'd used to be. It became a game between me and my sibling to try to catch you and cuddle you. And then do it with the others at the same time as well! You weren't so obstinate that you were against this but you'd make your displeasure known. You never tried to hurt us though, even when I'd managed to grab all three of you at once and hold you together. You were strong and could have injured us if you wished, I still have faint scars from times you almost tried, but you didn't.

During the next few years I'd try to be at every single vet appointment you had. I'd try and be with you in the car to talk to you, as well as to try and pet you through the grates in the carrier. You would spend the whole ride despiratly trying to convince us and me to turn around and bring you back. But at the Vetrenatians office, that's where you really appreciated my presence. Like clockwork, each time we went together you'd attempt to hide from the vet, oh how you hated being their, and we'd have to disassemble the carrier to do so. When you were finally forced out and put onto the table you'd hunker low trying for a place to hide almost inevitably burying your nose into whatever I was wearing (Usually a hooded sweatshirt) and doing your best to ignore everything that was going on. An as much as you hated it, we know that you could tell when we were going back home from the way your demenour changed. Not just were you more quiet you were friendlier. However, as you aged and as your health problems grew worse we'd often have to put a pillow over the door to prevent you from scraping the skin off your nose from trying to force your way out. I'm sure given enough time you could have tried to use your paws to escape, and you thought of that once, but in your desperation it was a rarity.

Through much of middle school, you were my ally through all the work that needed done. You wouldn't join to 'help' with my work like a certain other cat would. However you would be there to support me emotionally whenever I needed it. You'd visit me often, perking up and jumping up to meet me. It was also during this time that you were at your most playful. Still young enough to dance about with the greatest of ease, flitting through the air like a dragonfly, but also you were fast and lethal capable of killing a string in seconds from when it started moving. You were quick, but so agile that I could stand right in your path and trust that you would barrel through like a freight train and not so much as brush my toes! Even our new cats can't match that. There were so many different things you liked to play with, we had cat dancer ribbons that our old cats had loved to death (In one case literal for the dancer), the paper and wire toys that we'd get at the vets, many a string some such as your favorite pink ones my dad had owned, others like the blue cord that were ones I had used in scouting, and one of the most special was a thick red cord I had gotten in 8th grade chinese class. All of these were ones with their own merits to chasing, and their own unique texture to chew on. But there was one toy that was far above the rest. The Fishie, as we call it, is a toy that's composed of a small plush fish attached to a three part plastic rod by a long thin elastic cord. When used properly it could dance through the air better then any bird, and could zip and zoom so fast that it became a blur. And still, you found it easy to catch. You could snatch it out of the air with one paw, or pin it to the ground to prevent it from escaping! In some cases, even pick it or the string out of midair with your mouth! No matter what was chosen though, the thing that you loved most about it was chewing on the strings. You loved their texture, taking them into your mouth and chomping the elastic between your teeth. You could shred through them so fast, that if we didn't do something to stop it the toy would be unusable in seconds. You did this so often that I've lost track of how many were ruined in replaced. As far as I know there are currently seven in our house at the moment, only two of which are intact. But I know that the number is much higher than that, only proving what a great huntress you are.

Of course, it wasn't just toys that you hunted. You loved hunting bugs, to the point that even as you got older and I was at college age you'd still be willing to chase down a bug and could be seen stalking one through the halls and rooms of our house. You could keep up with flies, and could hunt so well that when you set your mind to it none of the insects could escape her grasp. While you were younger your favored method was to have someone pick you up and use their shoulder as a platform from which to hunt at new angles Dad was always your favorite for that, he had nice wide shoulders and while I did as well I was much too bony to make a good ride. That didn't mean that you weren't willing to hunt with me, but I was far from your preferred choice. Of course, as you got older you stopped doing this as much, before only doing it with dad, and then eventually stopping altogether. It's easy to see why, your daring exploits as a kitten and young cat were something that were dangerous. Perching on someone and standing wide. While you were young this may have seemed fresh and exciting. But now, that was quite dangerous. But that didn't mean you stopped the hunt, instead you took it to the ground. And for anyone who would have thought that caution would have slowed you down you proved them wrong. You were still, even when I went to college, able to rush around the house in hot pursuit of the devious mayfly and ensure that she as the Huntress brought them to justice. A proud warrior for many years, even after she'd gotten asthma that crippled her potential.

Your explorative heart was one that was right at home with us. While you never went outside (And never wanted to) the design of our house left a number of nooks and crannies all over the place for you to explore. And explore you did! You went from the depths of the basement to the point that we had to wall off all the entrances to the crawl space in order to prevent you from getting lost in there, all the way to the top of the refigerator finding new spots for you to lie down and sleep. In our rooms, you found spots in our closets and beds that we wouldn't discover for years to fall asleep, and now that you've passed I'm not sure that we ever will find all of your hiding spots. I think I may have found all the ones you used in my room. And if I may say so, there are quite a few devious ones that you had from various places under my furniture to areas that were just hidden by line of sight in exceptionally devious ways. You were an expert at finding areas of the house that no one else knew about, and when you wouldn't show up for meds we'd often find new hiding spots we didn't know you used let alone existed that you would come trotting out from once we had been searching long enough.

Misty, you are perhaps one of the cats I've known who's the best at cuddling. It wasn't just how much love you gave, but how you gave it as well. You were an expert at knowing how to lie down just so the weight was put in all the right places. You were able to make it so that someone could feel all of your bodyweight on them from just the head. And were able to make it so that you could find just the right angle to put their leg to sleep. Of course your timing was perfect as well, you knew just when we were going to get up and would always try and visit us then to get us to stay just a little longer. It worked on me far less times then I would care to admit, though I'm still glad you chose me so many times. You were in many ways one of the best cats at cuddling I've ever had, a master of knowing just where to lay and just when to change positions. You were able to put on so much weight, that after spending so many hours with your dead body I can no longer call the pressure you put on my legs 'dead weight.' You were a loving girl who was able to make me smile just by popping up, but only more so if you would choose to lay down. I have seen how you've changed through the years, and I'm sorry that I've changed as well. From tossing and turning too much in bed to serve as a good resting spot, to that period where when you slept I'd get so anxious about whether or not you were alive that I would check your breathing almost always inadvertently waking you up. The fact that I would do so many things to be a worse place to cuddle and nap is one of my biggest regrets with how I treated you. And I wish so deeply that I could go back and fix it that you will never know.

You have stuck by me for all these years, and I will be ever thankful for that. We met in the fourth grade but you were my support and guidance for every year after till I moved to college. And when I had to return, you were still there for me. When I was a child you were my playmate, and you were my friend always there when I needed someone. When i was a tween you were there to be my companion when I was adrift in the sea of a new social environment. You were my advisor through my high school years always willing to join me when I needed to do homework for longer and a friend when I was finished and needed someone to spend time with. And that didn't change when I came back from college. I was at some of my lowest then, fully cognizant of how much I had failed and helpless to prevent it. But you didn't care. You still loved me. And through doing so you helped me through that, by being the companion I needed and guidence forward every step of the way. I have never fully repayed you for that, and now I never can. You have been a guiding light, and I as I have grown older have found myself not giving you that which you deserve. Something I regret to the deepest depths of my heart, and will carry with me till the day we meet again.

But I know who your greatest friends were. It wasn't me, or my dad whom you had chosen as your people. It was the other cats, specifically Pouncers. While Nicky was someone that you had fondness for you never truly developed a bond with him and the youth of Cypher and Jasmine may have been entertaining to watch it is impossible to deny that they were far from the kindest to you. Though early on, you were quick to give them a what for before age began to catch up to you. No, your greatest friends were the ones you arrived at our house with: Pouncers and Shadow. Shadow was a good friend, and while he often annoyed you with his desire to always be close to someone, and how loud he was you still more then tolerated him and would let him clean you. He was a bit of a bully to you, but eventually that to would end even though he desperately wanted you attention. However, we know truly that Pouncers was your soulmate. He was a Russian blue, far cuter then a button, and with a heart that was large enough to hold everyone in it. He was the one you truely loved, the two of you often snuggling close to each other and spending as much time together as you could. Cleaning each other, as well as curling up close even in areas as small as someone's lap. You two were practically made for each other, no creator could have done a better job. And I'm sure you were the most devastated of us all when he died. I know that a year and a half prior you had been at deaths door yourself, and despite the poor health that he was in Pounce was still just as himself as ever. He was still as energetic as he was, and he was still just as loving as he was. And when I came back from college, I could tell that you had lost a part of yourself with him. You had lost some of your spark, I could still see it dancing behind your eyes, and you hadn't lost any of your spunk. But I knew that you would never show it as you had before.

While you have suffered with anxiety and depression for a long time, I know that they were managed and under control. And I know you knew as well, from how you would rise in the morning to take meds as well as how you would dutifully demand them every night. But we weren't sure that you would make it after you got asthma. When it started out it wasn't minor, it was a health risk that very nearly put you in a state where you would die if it got worse. But at the end the medication worked, and you survived. And you were able to spend a year and a half more with Pounce before he passed away. And then an additional three and a half years with us and shadow. I'm sorry that this was around the time I stopped traveling with you to the vet. And this was the time I stopped going in with you. This was when covid was around, and in my anxiety about catching it again I had neglected to give you the treatment that you deserve. It was a failure on my part to act like I had, to neglect you and force you into such a situation without due cause. And this is another deep regret in how I treated you. I can only hope that when we meet next you can find it in you to forgive me.

College was a good time for me, I enjoyed what I was doing, but I had to do it without you. This wasn't gaurenteed. We very nearly had me go to a school where I would be able to live at home and still spend time with you, but in my haste for freedom I left. To this day I can't say that was a mistake. Even if at the moment I deeply regret all the time I couldn't spend with you. But, when I came back from college in 2020 that was after pounces death. No one was alright at that time, everyone was still grieving, you most of all, and I had so far failed to fully conceptualize what it meant. I remember being in the college mess hall, and was talking with some friends from a club. They had asked if I was excited to return home, and remembering that Pounce was dead I responded with a dejected "No." That isn't to say that I didn't want to be back with everyone. But despite having a week to prepare for coming home to a house without Pounce, I was not ready at all. It was like having a wound that was torn open again before it had even begun to heal, and I know it was far worse for you. I know people say that Cat's can't grieve. However, anyone who would have seen you then would've known otherwise. You hadn't just lost a friend, you'd lost a soulmate and the other half of your spark had been lost to you. While you are reunited now, at the time you would have nothing to take comfort in besides us. And I had little to take comfort in besides you. But you helped me, more then you'll ever know, to work through the grief I was feeling. It was awful, yes, but you helped me through the loss more then you'll ever know.

These past few years have been bad for both of us. I have been affected by Gender Dysphoria, Anxiety, Depression, and ADD while you have been afflicted with the rigors of age. I know that it must have been painful for you to see me as I was without any understanding as to why I would breakdown like that or why I seemed to be at times broken. But, nonetheless you still came to help me with it. To spend time with me, and act as emotional support by being there for me when I needed you to be. I wish I could have done the same for you. But when you get so old that your eyes and ears begin to fail there is nothing that can be done to help. I have watched as you have stopped going to your favorite hiding places such as the top of the refrigerator, or the upper shelf of a closet, because you can no longer jump. And if you did you are no longer confident enough in yourself to get down. I have watched as you've slowed the hunting of bugs from running to beat them at whatever game they claim they are better at, to stopping and sitting to bat at you. But these past few months have been the worst. I have watched you go from dashing to catch a string, even if it was only once, to just yesterday being unable to do so because you had something stopping you that I can't see or know and can only guess on. I have watched as you've gone from tracking a string with all of your senses, to you being unable to track your favorite cords when they are right in front of your mouth. Yesterday I did my best to interact with you as much as possible, to do everything in my power to make sure it was excellent. And I watched, as you were unable to jump up to explore the counters you so desperatly wished to walk on, I felt it as the string in my hand was tugged forward with a far weaker force then it ever had been before, I heard it as you struggled to keep your purr motor running and it weakened even as I was petting you. Misty I love you. I wish I could do everything in my power to help you. But in these last few days, I do not know what I can do to help you. Except this.

The person who came to put you down today arrived four minutes early at 10:26 instead of 10:30. You were put down around 10:50. I couldn't read the clocks through my tears, I can only guess based on when my alarm sounded to announce the change in hours. You may not know this but you died in dads arms with me caressing you, even though you fell asleep from the anesthesia in my arms tucking yourself into my arms just like you do at the vet in a sight just as tragic to see as it is joyous that even now you can find comfort in me. I wish it could have been another way.

Yesterday on the 20th the appointment was made. I was supposed to work that day but called it in to spend time with you. I thank you for being willing to spend it with me, yes you hid in the backroom and the closet like you usually do. But you were willing to spend most of it with me. You were willing to spend most of it getting carressed, petted, skritched, loved in a hundred different ways by me. My sibling came in to give you love as well, but they had to go to work. Dad was too sick from the flu to stay awake long enough to spend much time with you. But when he woke up in the evening you still spent hours cuddling with him. You made his day with that you know? My mom had to go to work, but she still took care of you. I wish they also could have spent the day as I did. Memorizing every contour of your body, taking enough pictures to fill a book, filming and recording you as I tried to get every little thing you do recorded to try and stop my memory from drifting too far away from who you are. I have tried to memorize the shape of your head, the contour of your back, the way your ears flick when you rub them. I know the contours of your gut from when it bloated, I can feel just how they shift as you slowly remove it from your system. I know how you purr, I know your dusty scent. And I dread that I will one day forget it all. Please don't let me. I know it wasn't the best day to memorize everything about you. I know I say how you failed to dash, how your body was slowing down, how you couldn't see or sense where things where. But, I could also tell that under there it was you.

On the 19th we were debating what date for putting you down was best. We still tried our best to spend time with you knowing this could be our last chances. I didn't do a good enough job. I should have done better. I grew bored with it, not fully realizing how little time we had left and spent much of the afternoon simply being near you. On that day we hadn't made a decision and the way that you acted gave us hope that you could survive a few more weeks without your condition getting worse. That day you lit a fire under me in order to many things done. And I thank you for that.

The 18th was when I got my first full day knowing what I wanted to do to make your life as nice as possible before you passed. However I don't remember much of that day. I know how desperately I tried to spend it with you, as well as later failing to do so. I am not proud of how I operated that day, and wish I had focused more on you.

On the 17th I had work. I don't think you'll understand the pain it was to spend it away from you. It was only five and a half hours, but even with the medications I had taken it felt like an eternity. I was a Dead women walking all day at work, unable to get the energy to do my job because of how drained I was. I had spent much of the morning trying to be with you but I had not gotten much sleep waking early that day from thirst. Thankfully you still accepted me that day, and we spent good time together. At this point I didn't know when you would be put down, but I was fearing for the worst. This was also the day we almost decided to switch back and try insulin. We know you were living a good life, and one that you weren't in much pain. And we know that you were enjoying it. But we also knew all that would change once the treatment started.

On the 16th it was confirmed we would put you down. I had an eight hour work day and after coming home we ate dinner and then we discussed what we would do with you. Only a few days prior we'd learned that you had Diabetes, and it was barely two weeks ago from today that we'd taken you in to the veterinarians office for testing to help you with your gas problem. I was distraught, we all were. No body wanted this option, the issue is that we also knew that your bloodsugar was so high that in order to feel better you would have to endure weeks or even months of bihourly pin pricks, twice daily injections, and a hormone drop of over 300 that would leave you grumpy, hungry, and generally feeling awful for weeks on end. It was that, or put you down. Because letting you die to diabeties wasn't an option. I had trouble sleeping that night, I couldn't cry myself to sleep that night as much as I tried and was forced to try and find another option to fall asleep. It worked, eventually.

In many ways today has been the worst of the days. As much pain as everything else was, as much pain as it was knowing just how physically frail you've gotten, as painful as it is knowing just how much age has caught up to you, you were still you. Misty, it was painful to see Misty trapped in her own body. A body that was unable to fully do what it wanted to do, that couldn't see what it wanted to see, a body that couldn't be what it wanted to be. But through it all you were still at your core Misty. And now I've lost that. It has been around six hours and thirty minutes since you passed as I write this. It was painful to lock you out of your sleeping places Misty. But we wanted to make sure your death was as painless as possible. But that pain of forcing you to do what you didn't want to of making you uncomfortable. It's less then the pain of losing you, and far less painful than if you had died by one of the other options creeping up on you. I know the details of liver failure deaths. I know the details of diabetes deaths. And I will take the pain of feeling hollow physically and emotionally only to breakout in extreme grief at your loss if it means that you will never have to experience that. Please, if you can, let us know if we made the right decision. Do you approve of what we did, I can only pray that you do. To who? You of course. I pray you are still watching over us and waiting for us with Pounce. I pray that when it is our turn to leave for the afterlife we can meet again. I pray I can remember you forever and always, and that I will never forget you.

Misty, you have been my greatest companion through life. I am 22 years old, we got you when I was 9. You have been with me so long I find it difficult to describe. You have been with us longer then I have been reading books without pictures, you have been with me longer then I have known about sex and human reproduction. You have been with me before schools started implementing personal computers, and those that I brought home were all younger then you and part of a program younger then you. You have been a part of my life for more then half of it and I am so glad you were. I am so glad that you were willing to stand by me, I am so happy that we have had 14 long beautiful years together. I remember playing with you, you leaping through tunnels as the crinkle and rustle just like pounce would. I remember you and him sleeping together in a yin-yang esque symbol. I remember oh so much about you, the bad and the good, I remember accidentally throwing you off while I sleep. And how mad you were at me. Now that you are gone, I can not go back to normal. Because you are so intertwined with it that I must create a new one if I wish to be normal again. And I hate doing that, I hate having to construct a new world without you to understand. But please, wait for me on the other side. I pray it will be long, but please. Wait for me. I know in your old age you have become, as my dad put it, "A Peaceful Patience" so please show me that. Wait for me so we can meet again.

Please my Darling Misty.

My Little Girl.

My Princess.

My Cat.

Until we meet again, I love you, I love you always, and I love everything about you.

[0daytrick0]

Back home...

So, I'm officially back home in the Isa. Compared to Townsville the place is definitely an eyesore 😅. Just one big industrial town.

Anyway, it's definitely felt easier since I got back. Me and my partner have had to move back in with his parents due to the lease ending at our flat. But we can finally save money at least.

We were on the lookout for a house and came across this place with potential. Three bedrooms plus a study, a two bay shed with a little garden shed. The front and back yard are fenced off from each other. There is plenty of room for my partners cars. There is a nice front deck followed by a nice shaded, concrete area out back. The loungeroom is seperated from the dining room. And the dinning room is massive and leads into the kitchen. There is an inside laundry and a decent sized kitchen. The toilet is sperated from the bathroom. And finally lots of windows and wooden floors.

The place is really nice. Especially when you compare it to the flat we were living in prior. We didn't even have room for an inside laundry or dining room. And the kitchen was so small we could only cook basic meals. One of the rooms didn't have aircon and when we first moved in the loungeroom didn't even have a working aircon. The flat was more than enough for us when we first moved out. But when me and my partner started to grow and do our own things, we found it would be nice if we had seperate rooms to do so. He has a study for his YouTube and I have a study for my university studies. Then we have a guest bedroom for when mates stay over. And this is what this new place has!

Long story short, we got approved yesterday for the house. After a year of applying for countless houses, we finally have one to call our home.

I am so pumped to move in. I have a few weeks before we can as it needs a deeeeeeep clean. The person who lived there previously clearly didn't get his bond back...

The only sucky thing about the house thus far is the location. I mean it works in our favour to have cheap rent. But it's smack bang in what we would call the "bronks" of Mount Isa. But, in saying that, my partners parents already live in the bronks and as long as you have a good fence and a big dog, they won't touch you. The neighbourhood is too busy fighting each other than to break into a house next door. Plus you don't shit where you sleep as the saying goes.

The house is fairly private too. So I'm not too worried as we have fencing and lots of greenery to give us our privacy from the street.

I'm just super excited. For once something is correctly falling into place. And after all the drama in Townsville, it feels real nice to know I made the right decision and finally getting something we have wanted for ages.

The house itself needs a bit of fixing and maintenance. But my partner is all over that. And if we do it right, they will probably compensate us for what we do fix. Then we get to make the place how we want it.

I still have some things to do. So there is no rush to move in anyway. So it works in nicely.

To catch you up on the drama in Townsville. It was just not realistic to stay there anymore. Census sad was coming up. And that meant I had to make a decision to stay or drop out soon. As if I pull out before census date, I'm not in debt and owe the campus nothing. But if I stayed, I would be stuck there for at least the rest of the year. And I could not financially afford that.

Job hunting sucked. And I only managed to get two jobs out of the 30 resumes I handed out. Both jobs were corrupt and mean. I can deal with stress and pressure. But when menagement doesn't care about their own staff, that's when I draw the line.

I couldn't get youth alowence due to my parents income. As untill I'm officially 22, I'm considered a 'dependent' and it relies off my parents combined income. Which is alot...

I tried going to a youth centre for financial assistance but all they could really do is offer me a shelter to stay if I did become homeless.

Then the accident that occured with my partners sister and how she lost her leg. Then to have him trying to move out of the flat on his own with barely any assistance.

All of this background noise was just too much to focus on uni. I couldn't even afford to put food on the table as all of my friends and partners money was going straight to fuel and rent. As I couldn't go to job interviews without fuel. And I couldn't be presentable and study without a roof over my head. Food really was not a priority. Which is crazy to think about looking back at it now.

The university itself couldn't really help me. And all they could really do is offer me 10 free counseling sessions. Which doesn't fix my problems.

Sure I could of stayed. Could of worked at a shitty job. Could of starved and made do where I could. But honestly, it was realistic in the end. And that's how I had to look at it. In black and white.

The best thing to do was to drop out, and even as I am writing this a few weeks later, I do not regret my decision. I can still do university online. Still do a bachelor of psychological science online. But this time... There is no rush. No need for loads of savings. No pressure. I do it when I'm ready. And I don't have to worry about changing my whole lifestyle to suit it. As it's online and flexible.

While in Townsville, as short lived as it was, I got to do everything I wanted to. I finally got to experience the atmosphere of a university. Meet new people. Attend a lecture in real time. I got to bludge around in the campus and purchase food and a coffee and be 'that girl'. I got to experience what it would be like to live on my own away from my partner and just focus on me, myself and I. I got to move to a whole new city and live there by myself. I learnt my way around and got lost a few times but always managed to find my way back home. I got to experience a whole different lifestyle and live near an ocean. Eat fish and chips on the beach with a friend. As expensive and stressful as townsville was, I got to do everything I wanted to do in the first place and more. And in top of it all, now when I do online, I know that it's the better option and it will keep me focused. There will be no "oh, i wonder if it would be easier just to be in Townsville to do university?" As I know now, that it would not.

As of right now, all I have to do is relax. I have the textbooks from my psych classes to study this year. So I can get ahead for next. I can look for a job related to mental health while I'm here and work at bambinos while I wait. I can save money with my partner and purchase some nice things for our new home. All the while being with my partner. And I can stay with my friends and not have to ditch them to focus on me.

Overall I see this as a win and I'm am greatful I had the opportunity to have a supportive boyfriend to get me to Townsville and an amazing friend to help me pay to stay in Townsville. It's been tough. It's been tough. But I'm glad it's over and I can take it a little more easy. While still working towards my dreams.

[asleepandawake]

6.03.2022 - 4:50 PM [AWAKE]

I woke up early today with no dreams to remember. My new FWB stayed up with me until the sun arose, and as we tried to fall asleep, the noise in the world outside my room kept me from falling into a deep sleep. I can't recall if anything we talked about last night was of any importance, but it was what I would call a "nice distraction." Sex, talk, T.V. on in the background, snacking... distraction. She's very nice and kind. I feel horrendous though, as my friend Stephen told me that this girl reminds him of my ex. I didn't see it at first, but I guess after that statement I can.

"I'm not saying you're looking for your ex in her, but she seems familiar to you, and I guess that's good. Just know I saw how you acted when your ex did what she did. So, I don't know." That's what he told me.

Am I trying to replace my ex-partner? With someone else similar? I don't know. But distraction is nice. I'll take it.

When I woke up, my FWB had to leave. Something about dog sitting, she said. The loneliness settled back in quickly and I decided it was time for a drink early in the afternoon, so I banged my fists against my roommates door and woke her up and forced her to come out with me.

There's a lot of bars in this town, but only a few I like. My favorite is the bar I work at. As we arrive, I see my ex-partners car parked close to the entrance. I know she's inside and I can't face her. I should be the better person, put on a smiling face, show that nothing's wrong, have a facade of "I'm doing okay." But I can't. If I see my ex-partner I know it won't end well for either of us. My roommate and I head out to a different bar with my tail between my legs. I am ashamed.

The new bar is completely empty in the early afternoon. One bartender and just the two of us, my roommate and myself. All of the screens we can see are playing '90s Disney Cartoons, which I find hilariously fitting for me as I feel like a child in this moment, running from my problems. My roommate and I take two shots of whiskey back to back. I order a beer, which I never do. I think I'm looking for change in the small things. I'm not sure I'm a fan of Coors Lite, but it's not terrible. Plus, it's cheap, and I am broke after the breakup.

My roommate gets a phone call from a family member and disappears outside for several minutes. It is not good news. It is something more devastating than what I am going through. Heartbreak and heartache aren't always caused by a partner in your life. Heartbreak and heartache comes in many forms. When my roommate returns to her seat, I can see the heartache in her eyes. We are now both in a state of complete devestation we cannot avoid or hide. We take two more shots. We both begin to cry, silently, seperately, and together.

I am thinking of my ex-partner. I wish she could see me crying in the same way that some people wish they could attend their own funeral. I want her to see me without her knowing that I know. How complicated, this emotion is. How selfish, this emotion is.

I turned to my roommate at this exact moment and felt even more selfish. I buy us both one more shot and we go home. We now live in a house of grief.

[thewidowsghost]

Blessings (Daisy Johnson x Romanoff!Reader)

Daisy Johnson Masterlist

Main Masterlist

imapotatao asked: Hey! I have another Daisy X Reader request. Daisy asking Natasha Romanoff, Readers older sister, for her blessing to marry her little sister? Daisy being nervous to ask. (Cute and fluffy. )

(Y/n) Romanoff - an ungraduated Black Widow - and her girlfriend, Daisy Johnson, had gone over to her older sisters’ house to visit.

(Y/n) and Natasha had reunited with their other sister, Yelena, a year or so ago, and Natasha had opened her home to their blond sister.

(Y/n) cuddles up to her girlfriend of four years, pressing her face into Daisy’s neck. Breathing in through her nose, she smiles sleepily as she smells Daisy’s cherry vanilla shampoo.

“Why are you cuddling on the couch?” Yelena’s voice startles (Y/n), and she falls off the couch.

“I don’t like you,” (Y/n) grumbles, her face pressed into the floor.

Daisy peers down at (Y/n), who is still on the floor, through sleepy eyes.

“Lena, leave the two Lovebirds alone,” Natasha scolds, coming into the living room.

(Y/n) remains on the ground, still grumbling.

. . .

Daisy and (Y/n) had moved into the guest room to cuddle more in the privacy of their own room.

(Y/n) peppers kisses across Daisy’s cheeks and Daisy smiles, leaning into (Y/n)’s touches. She nuzzles into Daisy’s neck, her nose brushing the nape of Daisy’s neck. Daisy smiles as (Y/n) falls asleep against her, Daisy feeling more sleepy, listening to (Y/n)’s soft snores.

. . .

“They’re so precious,” Yelena whispers to Natasha, pulling out her phone and taking a picture of the two sleeping women.

Natasha slaps Yelena’s arm, looking amused.

. . .

(Y/n) had gone to the grocery store to pick up the essentials - salted caramel ice-cream - and Daisy had been pacing the guest room for about five minutes.

“Hey,” Natasha knocks on the door.

Daisy starts, staring at Natasha, her eyes wide.

“What’s wrong?” Natasha grows concerned, her eyebrows knitting.

“I - I,” Daisy stumbles over her words.

“Hey,” Natasha looks a lot more worried now. She places a hand on Daisy’s shoulder, squeezing it gently. “What’s the matter?”

Daisy exhales a little. “I have something I want to ask you.”

Natasha tilts her head in question.

“I - I,” Daisy pauses, taking a deep breath before continuing. “I love (Y/n) so much. I wanted to ask your permission to marry her.”

Natasha smiles gently at Daisy, her gaze warm, but she does ask, “Why do you need to ask my permission?” she asks.

“(Y/n) always wakes up from the same nightmare,” Daisy says.

Little (Y/n) Romanoff - age four - cries as her older blonde sister, Yelena, is pulled away from her and her oldest sister Natasha.

“Lena!” (Y/n) cries, and tears stream down Natasha’s face.

“Take them!” Draykov says, two guards pulling (Y/n) and Natasha away from Yelena.

All three young girls scream in protest.

One of the guards throws Natasha and (Y/n) into a shipping container, and Natasha cradles her baby sister to her, keeping (Y/n)’s head from hitting the metal floor of the container.

“Nattie! Lena?” (Y/n) asks her sister.

Natasha’s eyes cloud with sadness at the reminder of her and (Y/n)’s seperation from Yelena.

“You mean so much to (Y/n), I thought that it would mean so much more if you gave us your blessing,” Daisy tells Natasha.

Natasha softens, gazing at Daisy with contemplation. “I give you my blessing,” Natasha says with a smile.

A joyous smile spreads across Daisy’s face, and she hugs Natasha tightly. “Thank you!” Daisy replies happily.

“I don’t have to tell you to treat her well, because I know you will,” Natasha says.

. . .

(Y/n) and Daisy sit on a blanket, facing the ocean, (Y/n) leaning into Daisy’s side.

Tears well up in (Y/n)’s eyes as Daisy moves beside her, getting on one knee. (Y/n) cover her mouth with a hand.

“I love you so, so much,” Daisy begins. “We’ve been through so much together these last few years, and I want so much more with you, if you’ll let me.”

(Y/n) stands stunned, for a moment, her silhouette looking like blended charcoal against the setting sun.

Daisy’s expression grows worried at (Y/n)’s silence, which shocks (Y/n) out of her silence.

“Yes. A thousand - a million times yes,” Daisy’s eyes brighten, and her eyes sparkle joyfully as she slips the ring onto (Y/n)’s finger.

(Y/n) presses her lips to Daisy’s eagerly, her hand slipping behind Daisy’s neck, and Daisy responds with the same elation.

. . .

(Y/n) cuddles into Daisy’s side before bed, her stomach resting against Daisy’s side. The brunette relaxed by (Y/n)’s soft snores as usual.

A little redhaired girl runs into the room and over to the bed; the girl’ chocolate brown eyes brighten as she looks at (Y/n)’s belly.

Daisy leans over, and lifts the little girl, Yelena, up onto the bed, and she leans over (Y/n)’s belly.

“Hi Baby,” Yelena’s little hands rest on (Y/n)’s stomach.

(Y/n) smiles sleepily at Yelena, wrapping her arms around the little girl.

Little Yelena lets out a murmur of protest, squirming out of (Y/n)’s arms to lean over (Y/n)’s belly again.

“Hi, Baby!” Yelena says again. “It’s your big sister! I love you, Baby!” Yelena cuddles (Y/n)’s belly.

Daisy’s eyes are warm with affection as she gazes down at the little girl. Then, she looks up, meeting (Y/n)’s gaze. (Y/n)’s gaze is sleepy, but full of affection and love.

Daisy shifts forward a little, pressing a soft kiss to (Y/n)’s cheek.

(Y/n) smiles up at Daisy.

“Come on, Love,” Daisy tickles Yelena’s stomach, and Yelena squirms, giggling. “It’s bedtime. Mommy’s tired.” Daisy slides off the bed.

Yelena pouts a little, but she gives (Y/n)’s belly another short cuddle, before letting (Y/n) press a loving kiss on her cheek.

Yelena holds out her arms, and Daisy scoops her up.

“Good night, Mommy! Good night, Baby!” Yelena says over Daisy’s shoulder.

“Night, sweetheart,” (Y/n) replies sleepily.

When Daisy returns, a few minutes later, she finds (Y/n) asleep, snoring softly.

Daisy’s gaze softens. Walking over to the other side of the bed, Daisy covers (Y/n) with the sheets and the comforter.

Daisy climbs into bed, and (Y/n) shifts unconsciously towards Daisy’s warmth.

Daisy smiles, resting her chin on (Y/n)’s head.

Word Count: 1049 words

Skye / Daisy Johnson x Fem!Reader Taglist:

@imapotato

@confusinggemini612

@marie45019

[farfromharry]

Call me when you get this | College!Tom fic

Summary: you knew it’d be difficult for your relationship when you and tom went away to seperate universities. but now you were missing each others calls, your only form of communication, living off of the sound of your lover through a voicemail.

Word count - 14.3k+

Warnings - language, mentions of underage drinking, suggestive content, angst

━━━━━━━━━♡♥♡━━━━━━━━━

Friday, 7th September

Standing in front of your boyfriend’s house before nine in the morning on a cold Friday in September was not the place you really wanted to be right now, especially when you were having to say goodbye to him for who knows how long.

“I guess this is it,” he said, his voice lacking that usual boyish excitement it possessed when he was around you.

Today was the day you and Tom had been dreading for so many months. The day Tom left and really solidified the fact that the two of you had to part to go to different colleges, which were also quite a few hours away from each other. Your heart was aching as he stared at you with those sad, brown, puppy dog eyes, but you were sure your own eyes were exactly the same.

You began to tear up as you watched him pack his bags into the back of his mum’s car, your bottom lip jutting out in a pout directed at him. When he turned his head he noticed you staring and opened his strong arms for you, inviting you in. You obviously immediately accepted, rushing into his warm embrace. He squeezed you tightly in his arms, feeling your body begin to shake as you let out a broken sob.

“Hey, hey, look at me.” He cupped your cheeks, making sure you were looking at him before he spoke. He had a comforting smile on his lips, one that always made you feel all warm inside. “This isn’t goodbye,” he promised, kissing your head a few times, “‘m gonna visit as much as I can, we’ll see each other soon. I’m not leaving forever,” he said.

“I’m going to miss you, so much,” you whispered, letting his strong, calming, scent overwhelm you when you buried your head back in his hoodie. “I’m so used to seeing you everyday.”

“I’m going to miss you too, more than you know Y/N.” You sighed sadly, nuzzling your face even deeper into his chest, if that was possible. Tom smiled, running his fingers through your hair as you both swayed softly in your embrace.

The moment was ruined all too soon by Nikki shouting for him. She felt bad for breaking up your moment, but the drive was already long and they wanted to arrive before lunch.

“Tom, we have to go,” his mum announced, trying to motion for him to start heading to the car. All his stuff was already packed inside, you’d helped with most of that part earlier this morning just so you got to spend more time with him, and now he was all ready to go; even if you wish he wasn’t.

Nikki offered you a sympathetic smile, knowing you were struggling to part from her son. She’d always called it ‘puppy love’ but she didn’t quite understand the extent of your affection for one another.

“I love you, and I’ll call you as soon as I can,” he promised, pressing no less than three quick pecks onto your lips. You nodded, plastering on a fake smile. He wiped your tears with the pads of his thumb, his heart fluttering as you giggled at how silly you were being.

He leaned down to kiss you one more time, ignoring the mixed taste of both of your salty tears. Only then did you realise Tom was crying too, your heart aching.

“We’re idiots aren’t we?” you asked. He nodded, chuckling as he pulled away from you. The only touch you had now was from the way your pinkies were still locked in a promise that you were going to make this work.

“I’ll see you later, bub.” “See you later, Tommy.”

He placed one final kiss on your head before turning on his heel to walk down his driveway. As he climbed in the car you were tugged into a hug by one of the twins.

When you looked up you noticed the wild curls and rolled your eyes at Harry, but nonetheless rested your head against his chest. “I still don’t know how you put up with him for so long.”

You laughed, playfully pushing Sam for the comment to scold him.

“Seriously Y/N, he’s so in love with you. Everything’s gonna be fine,” he admits in Tom’s absence. He knew that if Tom were here right now he’d probably hit him for saying so out loud.

“He’s right, he never shuts up about you,” Harry added. “Always gushing about everything you do,” he fake gagged.

“He’s whipped,” Paddy said, the youngest of the brothers making you giggle. Your heart swelled in your chest, your body suddenly feeling warm, even in the cold London weather.

Within the time of your conversation, Tom had already left, shooting you one last longing glance along the way, a smile forming on his lips when he saw you laughing with his family. You eventually had to part from the brothers and head home to pack your own things, saying your goodbyes and then starting your short walk home.

»»——⍟——««

You didn’t expect that Tom would already be desperately missing you by the time it turned dark. But your computer ringing on your desk proved you wrong.

Seeing his contact name on your screen for a facetime call made your heart flutter, sitting down in your chair to answer his call. It was slightly glitchy for the first few seconds, just while it connected, but within a minute Tom’s pretty face was lighting up your screen.

“Missing me already, Holland?” you poked fun. You watched him roll his eyes, completely ignoring your comments. “Hi, angel,” he greeted.

You bit back a smile, tucking some loose hair behind your ear to try and tame it after you caught sight of the mess you looked like in the small box at the top of the screen.

“Hi, how was your drive?” you asked. You shuffled around a bit, trying to get comfortable in your now much more bare bedroom. You’d been packing your stuff for most of the day after you got home, so your hair was a complete mess that had just been thrown out of your face when you started getting too hot to have it in your face all the time. You had one of Tom’s many hoodies you’ve stolen clinging to your body, his scent surrounding you.

Just bringing the sleeve up to your nose was enough to make it feel like he was really with you right now and not just on a screen.

“It was long, very boring too,” he whined, running his hands through his curls. “I suppose my mum made it at least a little better.” You giggled, pouting playfully for him. “How awful.”

“I’m sorry I couldn’t help you pack,” he said, motioning to the boxes stacked behind you, a soft pout on his lips that just made you want to kiss him. He’d already told you he’d felt guilty that you helped pack for him, but he wasn’t there to do the same for you in return.

“S’okay, one more box and then I’m all ready to go in the morning anyway,” you reassured, motioning around your pretty much bare room with your arms.

“It looks so empty,” he commented, recalling in his head how nicely decorated it’d looked during his millions of visits. You nodded, frowning as you looked at your childhood room that held almost no kind of decoration on the walls.

“Anyway, let’s stop moping, I don’t want to cry again today,” you demanded, hearing a chuckle come from his end. He nodded his head, quickly changing the subject to something more positive.

You and Tom were talking for hours. In that time he showed you his new dorm room, and told you that he’d need your assistance at some point to help decorate, but it was more of an excuse to get you to come visit already. Your parents also made themselves known at one point, greeting your boyfriend and asking how everything was going so far. You kicked them out after a while, playfully irritated that they were hogging your boyfriend from you.

“Get out,” you said, trying to hide your little giggle. Tom was laughing on the other side, watching this all go down. “I am so sorry about them.” He was still giggling, making you smile and roll your eyes.

“I love them, don’t worry,” he reassured you. You huffed. “I’m pretty sure they love you more than me,” you told him. He shrugged his shoulders, flashing you a cheeky grin.

“I can’t really blame them.” You scoffed, shaking your head at him, feigning disappointment.

Over the course of the call you could see him growing more and more tired. His words would come out slightly more slurred, his movements slower and his eyes fluttering shut every few minutes, craving sleep desperately.

“Is it bad that I miss you already?” he asked, eyes drooping as if he was about to fall asleep any second. You smiled, watching him with a heavy heart.

“No,” you whispered, so gently Tom almost didn’t hear it. “But i told you so.”

Your lips twitched into a grin, hearing an unimpressed groan come from the other end. When the moment died down you took another long look at your boyfriend. “You should get some rest, looks like you’re going to fall asleep any second.” He hummed, smiling at you sleepily as he rested his chin on his hand.

The simple action, even after seeing it a hundred times, still made your stomach erupt with butterflies, yet another smile overtaking your features. You were sure that at this rate your face was going to end up hurting from smiling so much, but you suppose those are the kind of sacrifices you have to make when your boyfriend’s adorable.

“Goodnight Tom, I love you,” you said, your finger hovering over the end call button. You waited for his reply patiently, knowing his very sleepy mind often took longer to process things.

“G’night. Love you.” He nuzzled his face into the blanket you’d given him before he left. The one you normally take with you to sleep at his house, the one that smelled just like a mix of your shampoo and perfume.

It made Tom’s heart pang, but your smell also comforted him in a way he couldn’t explain in words. You took one last look at his sleepy face before ending the call with a small sigh.

You fell back on your bed, your eyes landing on the box of stuff that you had to finish up before you could head to bed, your body and mind screaming at you for not doing it earlier. You begrudgingly pushed yourself up, moving over to the wall of your room that held your photos of your friends and you.

You smiled as you looked through each one, some of friends and family, others with Tom or Tessa or the other Holland siblings that had built up over the years.

One specific picture caught your eye, one where you and Tom were happily slow dancing together at his cousin's wedding in late June of the same year. The memories from that night all came flooding back all at once, your heart overflowing with love and adoration for the male for the thousandth time today.

“Ow tom, you just stepped on my foot,” you whined, frowning at him. Instead of apologising like a normal person would’ve, your boyfriend instead chose to burst into laughter. You gawked at him, trying not to crack up yourself, trying to keep up your angry facade.

“I-i’m sorry-“ he wheezed. You started to giggle yourself due to his contagious laughter, shaking your head at how childish he was.

“That hurt. You’re heavy,” you laughed, “You’re such a dick,” you mumbled, your smile refusing to fade. Tom beamed unphased by your attempted insults, kissing your head and somehow pulling your body even closer to him.

“But you love me,” he whispered, his head tucking into your neck, placing another barely there kiss on the skin of your bare shoulder. You rested your cheek against the side of his head, fingers stroking the short hair at the nape of his neck, listening to the sound of him humming along to the song.

“Yeah, I do.”

You didn’t even know Nikki had snapped the picture until you were in the car with his family driving home that night. Tom had fallen asleep in the car, his head on your shoulder after one too many drinks, the boy taking much advantage of being over the legal drinking age for the first time.

His mother had grabbed your attention in the silence and showed you the beautiful picture on her camera, watching as your face twisted into one of delight. “Nikki, it’s beautiful,” you told her, being completely honest with yourself, you were in awe.

“Well, I thought you two were just completely adorable.” She smiled at you. The romantic aura had your heart melting, asking her if you could have a copy for yourself. She was more than happy to oblige and the next day she was handing you a physical copy of the image.

Now here you were, taking the picture down after only two or so months of having it up. You felt your eyes welling up again, wiping them with the back of your hand. “Damn it Tom, you cursed, chuckling to yourself over how obviously in love you were with this boy.

»»——⍟——««

Monday, 10th September

Tom's classes at uni were scheduled to start almost a week earlier than yours, which is why he had to leave home before you. Today was his first day of classes, he only had the one today but he had already promised to tell you about it as soon as it was over. He also knew that you should’ve arrived at your own campus this morning, making a mental note to ask you how it was going so far when he called you later.

Everything on your end was going well, you ended up driving there by yourself because your parents were unfortunately busy, but the unpacking process was coming along well.

Tom left his first drama class after the hour with a wide grin on his face. He'd just had arguably the best class of his life and he could barely contain his excitement long enough to wait to tell you about it. He pulled his phone out almost as soon as he stepped out of the classroom, stepping out of the way of the students piling out of the class. He pulled up your contact and hoped you weren’t too busy with unpacking your stuff, so he could talk to you while making the long journey back to his dorm.

Your loud ringtone filling the silence in your room interrupted your current task, shuffling over to see Tom's contact lighting up your screen the same as the night before. You knew you couldn’t be annoyed at his little interruption, especially because you’d already missed the sound of his voice so much and it’d only been a few hours at most.

“Goodmorning, angel.” You smiled as he greeted you, almost as soon as the line connected.

“You sound cheerful today,” you pointed out. You held the phone between your ear and your shoulder, putting the last of your books on the small wooden bookshelf in your room.

“I just had an amazing first class.”

“Well, I’m glad, tell me all about it,” you told him. He talked to you about his morning class for almost 20 minutes, rambling and gushing about how much he enjoyed it and everything that happened, down to a T. You couldn’t have been happier for him. After your long discussion, making sure you asked him lots of questions to give him the chance to let him give you every detail, he seemed to finally take a breath and turned the topic of conversation around. You ended up talking about you now, one of Tom’s favourite things to talk about as he’s told you tie and time again.

“How’s unpacking going?” he asked, finally arriving back in his own dorm. You heard him greet someone with a hello, furrowing your eyebrows in confusion. “Who was that?” you asked.

“My roommate,” he answered casually, like he hadn’t forgot to mention he ever even had one.

“You have a roommate, since when?” He paused and thought for a minute.

“Since I got the room I think, his name is Harrison,” he suddenly lowered his voice, cupping his mouth around the speaker of the phone, “He’s a bit of an arsehole though, I won’t lie.” You laughed loudly, glad you didn’t have your own roommate to share the small dorm with. You quickly got back on topic, Tom asking you even more questions.

“How are you settling in?” he asked, just as you had asked him last night.

“I'm okay, have some unpacking left to do, and classes don’t start until next week.” He hummed along with what you were saying, listening to every little word. “How’s the campus?”

“It's nice, but it’s lacking a certain pretty boy that I’m so used to seeing.” He awed, teasing you thoroughly about how sappy you were. You always got nervous when trying to flirt with your boyfriend, scared it wasn’t going to come out as smooth as you’d hoped.

“Shut up,” you said, trying to mask your embarrassment. He always managed to make you flustered when you talked about your feelings for him. He didn’t let it linger too long though, changing the subject as quickly as you’d moved on to it.

“So,” he started. “When do you think you could come help me decorate?” he asked, once again changing topics, this time however you were rather grateful he did.

“Need to see me in person already, Holland?” You turned the teasing around onto him, pausing what you were doing to give him your full attention.

“You know I do,” he said. You rolled your eyes when he didn’t end up nearly as embarrassed as you had just been. Sometimes his confidence in flirting really did infuriate you.

“No, but really, I want to see you. I miss your cute face,” he said, groaning towards the end of his sentence. You giggled, shaking your head. “Well, I have all this week that I can come down and see you,” you offered.

“How's Friday? You could stay the weekend, go back Sunday,” he suggested, “If that’s okay with you,” he added, not wanting to sound so demanding like he was forcing you to come.

“That sounds perfect, but check with your roommate, I don’t want to give him a reason to be more of a dick.” Tom laughed, nodding his head. “I appreciate that,” he chuckled. “and I will, don’t worry,” he promised.

There was a sudden, unintentional shift in the mood, the two of you becoming rather quiet as you both thought for a few moments. There was still the traces of your smiles on your lips, but they were quickly fading.

“How are we supposed to do this for so long?” you asked after the laughter completely died down, finally showcasing your worry to him that had been eating up at you practically since you got your college offers.

He smiled, shrugging his shoulders to himself as if it was obvious. “We’re Tom and Y/N, a fucking power couple, we got this,” he said, quoting something your school friends used to call you, all while calming your nerves about if your relationship would work long distance. “We had this discussion plenty of times before we left, I promise you, we’ll be okay.” You smiled, not that he could see.

“Good, because I'm not letting you go that easily mister.” He chuckled.

“I wouldn’t dream of letting you go either, you’re one of a kind Y/N.” You grinned, the two of you just basking in the knowledge of each other's presence.

“How did this get so cheesy so quick?” he asked, making you laugh.

“That’s just who you are,” you said.

You heard a childish scoff on the other end. “Am not.”

“You so are!” The two of you stayed on the call until you realised how much work you really had to do with your room. The boxes were still stacked up and unopened, you hadn’t even unpacked half yet.

“I appreciate your company, but I really need to get back to putting stuff away.” You didn’t really want to stop talking to him, but you couldn’t deny he was a massive distraction from your original task.

“Yeah of course, but I can't wait to see you Friday,” he said, making that giddy feeling linger in your chest. Butterflies were erupting in the pit of your stomach the more you thought about it.

“Me too, and we’ll have to plan when you can come down here sometime,” you said. “Unlike you, I have a room to myself,” you pointed out, having a slightly suggestive undertone to your words.

“I’ll remember that,” he paused, “Princess.”

You shivered, chills shooting down your spine, the nickname was something he would only use when the two of you were having, adult time.

“You bastard,” you said, referring to the way he said that with such ease, knowing it’d play on your mind for the rest of the day.

“Alright, well i’ll text you later,” he brushed it off, making his promise instead, hearing an ‘alright’ from you on the other end.

“I love you, Y/N.”

“I love you more, see you later Tom.” You ended the phone call with a fuzzy feeling all over your body, smiling to yourself, dazed. Tom was exactly the same all those miles away, laying back on his bed with a lovesick grin painted on to his face. You were both so in love, and so, so confident that your relationship would make it through this distance.

»»——⍟——««

Friday, 14th September

Friday thankfully came very quickly, something you were very, very happy about. Before setting off on your long, lonely journey, you pulled your phone out of your pocket to call Tom.

“Hello Thomas,” you greeted, unable to wipe your grin from your face. You were seeing your boy today.

“Hi beautiful, what’s up?” he asked, sounding rather out of breath. You furrowed your eyebrows. “Do you need an inhaler or something, or-“ you teased.

“I woke up late, I'm currently running across campus to my class.” You laughed at him, receiving an annoyed scoff from him.

“I just wanted to tell you I'm leaving now, I should probably be there just after lunch,” you said.

“That’s amazing, I’m sorry you’ve got to drive all that way alone though.” You shook your head, once again forgetting that he couldn’t see you.

“It’s okay, but I should let you get back to being late for your class, good luck,” you said.

“Thanks, very funny, I'll see you when you get here,” he said. You could practically hear the smile in his voice, even over his dog-like panting.

“See you later.” You hung up with a small squeal, a small smile staying glued on your face, even well into the drive after the conversation had ended.

You had to admit, the car ride was lonely by yourself, but it was also so worth it for Tom. It’d only been, not even two weeks, but you missed him greatly already and from what you’d heard from him, he felt exactly the same.

The silence in your car was filled with the sound of your different playlists playing through the speakers. Some were just from random playlists, others from the playlist that you and Tom seemed to most enjoy together.

You could feel your heart starting to beat faster, butterflies erupting in your stomach as you got closer and closer to your destination.

You sent him a quick text when you hit traffic just outside of the campus, telling him you’d be about 10 more minutes. You just received a simple smiley face in response. You and Tom both had your locations on for each other anyway, so he’d know when you arrived. It’d become a promise that you always would after one night when you’d been out with your friends getting drunk, and you’d gone a little bit too far.

You could barely even stand straight anymore, having already forgotten about a few drunken messages you’d sent to Tom before the last shot you’d taken. You were drawn out of your daze when you felt your phone buzzing against your leg, seeing Tom’s contact on your screen. You squealed like a little girl, answering his call with a slurred yell of his name.

“Where are you, baby?” he asked, concern laced all through the tone of his voice.

“ ‘M having fun with m-my-” he heard you huff, “I can’t find them.”

Tom’s eyes widened at the thought of you being alone and drunk in now an unknown location. He cursed under his breath, trying to think of a reasonable thing to do.

“Can you turn your location on for me, Y/N?”

You hummed, pulling the phone away from your ear. You tried to steady your vision, telling Tom that the room was spinning. It made things ten times more difficult, but you eventually managed to do it, alerting Tom with a cheer.

“I did it, Tommy,” you said, “Are you proud of me?” you sounded like a scared child, desperate to receive Tom’s validation.

“So proud of you, angel.”

Tom pulled up your location on his phone, noticing you were at a bar. He wasn’t sure how you’d managed to successfully get in underage, being only 17, but you managed.

“Can you stay where you are for me?” You nodded your head before realising he couldn’t see you. You giggled to yourself quietly before mumbling a quiet yes. Tom offered to stay on the phone with you but you told him you needed the bathroom, feeling as though you were going to throw up.

When Tom arrived, he had to ask the bouncer if he’d seen you, showing him a picture. The large man motioned to where you were sitting on the curb by yourself, shivering from the cold hitting your bare arms. He bent down beside you, reaching out to place his hand on your arm, shocked by how cold you were.

“Tommy,” you gushed, wrapping your arms around his neck, “By the way, I didn’t throw up,” you stated, almost as if you were proud of that achievement.

“That’s good, but let’s get you home.” He pulled off his jacket to wrap around your shoulders, helping you up off of the floor and guiding you to his car. You were heavily drunk but you weren’t completely out of it, so when Tom drove past your house, you began to whine at him.

“I’m not letting your parents see you like this, they’ll kill me and then you.”

You huffed like a child. “You’re too pretty to die.” Tom laughed, reaching over to grab your hand and press a kiss to your knuckles.

“Yeah?” “Yeah,” you sighed dreamily.

Tom helped you inside his house, making sure to avoid any creaks in the floorboards so he wouldn’t wake his family. He guided you up to his room and then started the process of being a good boyfriend. No matter how tired you were, he helped you change into some of his clothes, helped to take off your makeup and tied your hair up and then made you brush your teeth by yourself, even when you complained.

The last move was getting you under the covers off his bed, seeing you pass out almost as soon as your head hit the pillow. “Goodnight angel, you’re going to have a horrible hangover tomorrow.”

And true to Tom’s word, you woke up the next morning in his bed and clothes, your head pounding and only a faint memory of the previous night. Tom strutted into his room clad in only a pair of plain black joggers, his abdomen on full show.

“Ah, you’re finally awake.” He placed a glass of water and two pills down on the nightstand beside you, telling you to drink up so you could feel better. He filled you in on all the basic details and you just wanted his, ridiculously comfy bed, to swallow you whole.

“Maybe we should keep each other’s locations on from now on,” Tom suggested. You nodded, rubbing your side head and leaning into him. “I think that’d be a good idea.”

That’s how he knew you’d arrived in the campus car park. You had barely even stepped out of the car when he practically tackled you in a hug, taking you off-guard. You laughed loudly, wrapping your arms around his neck and nuzzling your nose into his cheek.

“I'm so glad you’re here,” he said, squeezing you tightly. You couldn’t push away your grin, your heart feeling like it was going to explode as you held your boy in your arms.

“I missed you bub,” you whispered, pulling back to kiss him. Your lips molded together perfectly, the two of you feeling as though you were complete again.

You weren’t sure you’d ever shared a kiss like this with Tom, and the two of you had shared lots of kisses. This one was different though, it felt like every moment of emotion from missing his person these past two weeks was being poured into this kiss and you loved it.

“Oi, Holland, cool it with the pda.” Tom turned his head, spotting one of the lads from his drama class and suddenly feeling embarrassed. You tried to turn his head to kiss you again, searching for his lips with yours and ignoring the obvious moron that interrupted you, but then huffing when he denied you. You followed his gaze, seeing a boy standing a few feet away.

“Who’s that?” You watched as he flipped him off jokingly, making some comment about how he at least had a girlfriend.

“That's Tuwaine, he’s in my drama class, met him the other day.” You nodded, smiling before turning back to look at your boyfriend.

“So, are you gonna show me to your dorm, or do we have to stay out in the cold?” you teased. He laughed, helping you take the bag you packed out of the back of your car and offering to carry it for you.

“Such a gentleman,” you commented.

“That I am,” he said, bowing playfully. You shared another round of laughter before you silently decided you really should get out of the cold weather.

“Lead the way, handsome.” He laced your fingers together, leading you in the direction of his building. You walked slowly, giving you both a chance to catch up. Over the small journey you’d shuffled closer to him, resting your head on his shoulder and wrapping your other hand around his arm.

“Right in here,” he said, guiding you through the door of his building. His hand resting comfortably on the small of your back. He unlocked the door to his room, opening it and like the gentleman he claimed he was, let you go first.

The two of you entered his dorm room, Tom holding out his arms and muttering a quiet ‘voila,’ making a show of it. You giggled at his behaviour, humming as you looked around at the messy and pretty much bare room.

“Very nice, it practically screams boy,” you pointed out, sending him a tormenting smile.

“Hey, hey, be nice.” He pointed his finger at you, scolding you teasingly.

“I’m always nice, whatever do you mean?” you smirked, playing dumb. He tossed your bag on his bed and pulled you in by your waist, he kissed you again, more passionate this time now it was without the interruption of the public eye. You gently pushed on his chest, ignoring his whine when he tried to follow your lips again, just as you had done earlier.

“I came here to help you decorate, not to sleep with you.” Tom rolled his eyes.

“We could do both,” he muttered. You tossed one of his pillows at him, seeing him raise his hands in defense.

You punched his shoulder lightly, kissing him quickly.

“Alright, let’s decorate,” you said, clapping your hands in front of you. Tom pulled out the boxes he had yet to unpack from his small wardrobe, handing you one that had pictures in it.

“Where do you want these?” you asked. He motioned to the wall next to his desk.

“Right there, so I can stare at your beautiful face when I don’t want to do my school work.” You giggled, nodding your head.

“Alright then, can’t argue with that.” You started pulling pictures out of the box, some of you two together, some of his family.

“Do you remember this?” you asked, holding one of the pictures of you both between the tips of your fingers. It was you and Tom at his family’s cabin in France, the one where they go skiing almost every year. You were both in big coats and snow trousers, trying to keep warm on the snowy mountain. You both had your ski goggles resting on your head, the two of you grinning widely. “Yeah, I do, he smiled, “That was such a great trip.”

“That reminds me, my mums been asking about if you’ll come again with us this year.” You smiled at the thought of Nikki thinking about you and wanting you to be around her family.

“I'd love to, I always have so much fun there,” you said, trying to be heartfelt and honest.

“Me too,” he winked, referring to the separate ‘fun’ you two always have right after midnight on new year's day, just to start the year off right.

“Behave,” you warned, pointing your finger at him.

“When's your roommate coming back?” you asked, changing the topic while stretching to put up another one of his pictures. He laughed, pressing his solid front to your back, cheekily nibbling on your neck.

“Why, something on your mind?” he asked, hinting at something else, squeezing your waist underneath his hands.

“No, stop that,” you scolded playfully, shaking your head at your boyfriend. “Just wanted to know if he’d have an issue with me being here, that’s all.” Tom hummed.

“He said he’d be fine with you being here, in his words ‘as long as he doesn’t have to hear us fuck,’ so.” You laughed, nodding your head.

“Well, he won’t have to worry about that,” you said, a cheeky smile on your lips. Tom pouted, however accepting your kiss as apology.

You spent the next few hours unpacking Tom's things, focusing more on hanging up some of his clothes on the racks he had, rather than the pictures you were doing earlier. At some point you did steal one of his hoodies, pulling it over your head just to have a sense of him close to you, even if he was already in the room with you, receiving the comment of, “Just can’t stand to be away from me, huh?” tugging at the material of the pink hoodie. “Shut up.”

After it went dark, you and Tom put off the rest of the decorating until tomorrow, not that there was much left to do anyway. You agreed on just watching movies for the rest of the night, calling for pizza. He got some extra too, to thank his roommate for letting you stay.

You spent what felt like forever searching for a film on your boyfriend’s laptop, finally settling on one that you and Tom both thought sounded good. The two of you sat together on his bed, your legs in his lap and his hand rubbing the scratchy fabric of your jeans.

“I’m starving,” you whined, burying your head in Tom's chest. Your stomach growled just to prove your point, making Tom laugh.

“It'll be here soon,” he reassured. A knock on the door made both of your heads perk up.

“That was good timing,” you joked. Tom jumped up from his bed, pulling some cash out of his wallet and opening the dorm door.

He frowned slightly when he saw his roommate.

“Forgot my key, sorry,” Tom nodded, seeing your face drop knowing you had to wait even longer for your food. “Someone did hand me this on the way in though, said it was for our room.” He held up 2 pizzas, a cheer coming from you that made Tom laugh. He handed them both to Tom. Tom however handed you one of the boxes, then the other one to the blonde male, who looked at him confused.

“This is actually for you.” He handed him the box of pizza, receiving a rather shocked thank you. “Just a thank you for letting Y/N stay,” he explained.

“This is Y/N by the way, Y/N this is Harrison,” he introduced. You smiled, waving to the blonde.

“You can join us if you’d like, we’re just watching a film,” you offered, just trying to be polite.

“No it’s okay, I’ll let you enjoy your time together, but thank you.” Tom smiled before making his way back over to you, climbing back into his bed behind you. He kissed your head, wrapping his arm around your waist and getting himself comfortable. Harrison put in his own set of headphones, watching something on his computer.

The movie dragged on, finding it growing harder and harder to keep your focus on it.

“Are you tired?” he asked. You hummed, turning your face over your shoulder to look at your boyfriend.

“We can finish the movie tomorrow,” he said. You thanked him, nuzzling your face in his chest and wrapping your arm around his stomach.

“Get ready for bed, I’ll pack this all away,” he said, motioning to the food and things on his bed and nightstand.

“Okay,” you mumbled, begrudgingly letting go of him and climbing out of his bed. You stretched your arms, your shirt riding up slightly and exposing the bottom of your stomach. Tom playfully jabbed you, making you squeal at the ticklish feeling.

“Stop,” you whined, slapping his hand away, pouting as he laughed at you. Tom kissed all over your face until you smiled, getting rid of your pout.

You grabbed your bag off of the floor, sticking your tongue out at your boyfriend childishly. You headed to the attached bathroom to change. You changed out of your current outfit, putting on some comfortable shorts to sleep in that you’d brought with you and then leaving on Tom's hoodie that you stole earlier. You put your hair up, just so it wouldn’t get in your face, tying it in a messy ponytail at the crown of your head.

“Y/N, are you decent?” Tom asked. You furrowed your eyebrows, opening the door for him.

“What’s up?” you asked, pulling your makeup remover out of your bag.

“I need to brush my teeth,” he said. You nodded, shifting to give him enough room by the sink as you began to take off your makeup. He watched you like a hawk the entire time, following your hand movements with every gentle swipe of the cotton pad on your face.

“What are you looking at?” you asked, causing him to snap out of his slight, dreamy daze.

“You’re just so pretty.” You huffed, shoving his shoulder.

“Stop being such a sap,” you commented.

“Only for you,” he teased, sending you a wink through the mirror.

Halfway through him brushing his own teeth, you began to brush yours. Playfully bouncing your hip against his own to push him out of the way of the sink. He stumbled and you let out a muffled giggle, watching him glare at you.

“Oh it’s on, I'll get you back,” he promised, receiving a teasing ‘oo’ from you.

After spitting in the sink, he flashed you a toothy grin through the mirror, one that made you giggle. Now that he had nothing left to do, he moved over to start bothering you, wrapping his arms around your waist and gently prodding your stomach to try and tickle you and get you to laugh.

“Tom,” you scolded, trying to focus on brushing your teeth.

“Hurry up, I wanna go to bed,” he whined, sounding almost like a pouty child. You finished up brushing your teeth, holding your hair back as you spit your toothpaste into the sink.

You wiped your mouth with the towel and then turned to Tom with a smile. He playfully pinched your cheeks, telling you you looked cute.

“Okay, I’m done,” you said, slapping his hands away. He placed his hand on the small of your back, guiding you out of the bathroom.

Upon entering his room again, you saw that he’d actually cleaned up his mess for once, receiving a proud, but sarcastic, clap from you. He caught on, telling you to behave.

“Come on, get in.” He pointed to his bed, letting you get in first. His bed was barely bigger than a single, so the two of you had to cramp together, not that either of you would ever complain. He climbed in after you did, pulling you back into his chest and burying his face in your hair.

“You smell really good.” You giggled tiredly at his comment, eyes fluttering shut.

“Thank you bubba, now go to sleep.” He turned off the light above his head, kissing your neck and closing his eyes.

“Goodnight,” he mumbled.

“G’night Tommy.”

You had to admit to him, his bed was almost as comfy as sleeping on a cloud- not that you’d know what that’s like, but still. It was possibly the best night's sleep you’d had in months, and you weren’t sure if it was because of the bed or because you were back in Tom’s strong arms. When you woke up though you were alone in the bed, looking around to find you were alone in the room too, Harrison’s bed already having been neatly made.

The door opened right on time and Tom strolled in. He noticed you were awake and flashed you one of his charming smiles.

“Good morning,” he greeted. You stretched your arms above your head, making a soft noise that almost made Tom melt in his converse.

“Morning,” you smiled, pulling his covers up so they were right underneath your chin. Tom thought you looked so precious, pulling out his phone to snap a quick picture of you, even after you protested against it.

He leaned down, kissing you gently.

“I went and got us some breakfast.” You pushed yourself into a sitting position, thanking him quietly. You ate together, making happy conversation. Tom asked about how you slept and also admitted he slept better with you in his arms. He basically forced you out of bed, after you refused to leave the warmth.

“Let’s finish decorating and then we have the rest of the day to spend together, doing whatever you want,” he said. “I like the sound of that.”

The rest of the weekend after that went by quicker than you would’ve liked. It felt like only hours before Tom was walking you to your car, ready to say goodbye to you again.

“I hate this,” you whined.

“Me too,” he mumbled. “I'll come and see you soon though, I promise,” he said, squeezing you tightly before opening your car door for you.

“Such a gentleman,” you teased, referencing the moment when you arrived a few days ago, kissing his lips.

“I’ll see you as soon as I can,” he repeated.

“I love you,” you muttered, running your fingers through his untamed curls.

“I love you more.” He kissed you one more time. You climbed into your car, waving to him through the window as you started up the engine. You sighed as you drove out of the gates of the campus, not really ready to start your long journey back to your own.

»»——⍟——««

Friday, 18th November

Unluckily for you and Tom, ‘soon’ ended up being almost a whole two months later. Tom was so busy with schoolwork that just kept piling up and by the time he was free, you were busy. The cycle kept repeating and it was horrible. You missed your boyfriend greatly and you were hoping he missed you just as much as he said he did.

Tom had arrived at your campus early in the morning, at a time you wished you didn’t have to be awake, just so he could spend longer with you. At least you could appreciate the gesture, even if you were losing out on sleep.

“And this is where the magic happens,” you said, opening the door to your dorm and guiding him in. He chuckled, kissing your head.

“What kind of magic?” he asked, an underlying dirty meaning to his question.

“Shut up.” you flushed.

“I can’t believe I haven’t been able to touch you in almost two months,” he whined, his boyish attitude dissolving and being replaced by your whiny, adorable boyfriend, nuzzling his face in your neck.

“I know,” you said, getting completely distracted by running your fingers through the overgrown curls that were peeking out from underneath his cap. You thought it was adorable, but you knew he’d grow to hate it soon enough. “You need a haircut,” you mumbled, pressing a kiss to his temple.

“I think I like it longer,” he said as you pulled off his cap, tugging at the long strands of dark hair. Tom stared at you as you did so, watching how fascinated you seemed to be with his hair. He couldn’t help leaning in, connecting his lips with yours.

“Uh-uh, not now,” you told him. “Later, baby.”

He huffed, pulling your lip between his teeth, running his hands up and down your body.

“Come on, you can decide if you like my hair longer.” His sentence had an underlying tone of lust to it, just like his earlier comment had too, trying to hint at a very non-pg act the two of you could be doing right now.

“Nope, later though, I promise.” He whined, throwing his head back. You bit back a grin, taking in the way his jaw looked sharp and very much attractive from this angle.

“Well, get dressed handsome, I’m taking you to dinner.” He lowered his head and looked at you with a smile, kissing you softly. “Are you trying to woo me, now?”

“Of course, now put on something pretty and let’s go, I need my arm candy.” You slapped his butt playfully, moving over to your wardrobe to pull out a slightly raunchy dress. Tom recognised the fabric instantly, one he’d seen time and time again that made him go wild.

“That’s what you’re wearing?” he asked, in a state of shock just imagining you in the material.

“Got a problem with that, Holland?” you asked. He rapidly shook his head, unsure if you were joking or not. “Good, now if you don’t mind, I’m going to go change.” You made your way into your bathroom, changing into the risky dress without any more interruptions from your boyfriend. 

You took your time getting ready, wanting to make Tom wait just to build up even more anticipation.

“Y/N, hurry up,” he whined. “I want to see you, already,” he complained, whining like a child on Christmas who didn’t get the toy they wanted. You opened the bathroom door slowly, leaning against the frame, staring at him innocently.

“Oh wow, you look incredible,” he said, getting up from his seat on your bed to shuffle over to you, sliding his hands around your waist. You made eye contact with him through the mirror, giving him a seductive smile that had his hands wandering around your body.

“How is my girlfriend so attractive?” he asked. You giggled, leaning back into his touch.

“We need to go, we don’t want to be late,” you said, dodging having to respond to the compliment that made you feel all warm inside, taking his hand and your purse and leading him out of the door.

Tom was in awe of the restaurant when you arrived, he didn’t realise you were taking him somewhere this fancy. “This place is really nice,” Tom said, looking around the restaurant. His hand clinged to your waist nervously as you told the hostess about your reservation. He wasn’t sure he’d ever been somewhere this nice that hadn’t been some sort of family function, so he felt like royalty right now.

“Are you trying to bankrupt me?” he asked, poking your stomach. You slapped his hand away, turning your attention back to the woman.

“This is my treat, come on.” You snapped him out of his daze, guiding him with you to your table. He pulled your chair out for you, kissing your head and almost daring you to make the gentleman joke again.

“You know I’m not letting you pay for this, right?” he asked. You stared at him with a furrowed brow. “Why not?”

He rolled his eyes. “I’m visiting you, let me spoil my girl.” He changed the topic of conversation before you got the chance to object.

“I’m so glad we got to do this,” he said. You shook your head, a grin growing on your face. You couldn’t lie though, you were happy to see him in real life again.

“Me too, I know we say this like every day,” you laughed. “But I really missed you Tom.” 

He leaned over the table, kissing you gently before sitting back down in his own seat. You went straight for and picked up the drinks menu, making Tom laugh and shake his head. “Already on the alcohol.” 

“Oh hush.” You scanned the list of wines, finding one that you and Tom had purchased before on a special occasion. You pointed to the name, seeing the cheeky grin spread across his face.

“I remember that night,” he chuckled. “How many rounds- I’m sorry I mean bottles, did we have that night?” Your jaw dropped, giggling at his false cover up. You shook your head.

“We’re in public, stop being inappropriate,” you warned. He shot you a wink, making your whole body flush for the thousandth time since he’d got here this morning.

“Hi, are you ready to order?” the waitress asked, glancing between you two and interrupting your reminiscence into the past. Tom looked up at her with a smile, her eyes widening.

“Could we just have a bottle of red wine for now, please,” he pointed to the one you meant. She nodded, trying to give him a flirty smile that made you snicker. She glared at you, timidly touching Tom’s shoulder before walking away.

“What was that?” you asked, a playful smirk that told Tom you weren’t mad at him.

“You can’t blame me, I’m just that irresistible.”

Her antics continued for most of the night, and you were growing more and more frustrated with how she was blatantly ignoring you to flirt with your boyfriend.

“If she flirts with you one more time, I won’t hesitate to knock over my wine on her,” you threatened, seeing Tom’s lips twitch into a smile. 

“Are you jealous?” he asked, intertwining your fingers on the table. He raised his free hand in defense when you glared at him. 

“Shut up.” You kicked him gently as a warning, seeing the wince cross Tom’s face.

“But not the red wine, you know that’ll stain,” he continued to tease, sarcasm lacing his words. You huffed, flipping him off. Tom didn’t let up on teasing you about your spontaneous hatred for the waitress all night. When she brought out your food he couldn’t help but make a few sly comments in response to her flirting.

“Do you want to try some?” he asked, holding his fork to you. He was trying to make up for pissing you off. You nodded, taking the food off of his fork with a hum.

“That’s really good.” He nodded, taking a sip of his wine. 

“Do you want to try some of mine?” You offered, doing the same for him as he’d done for you. He took it with a thank you, telling you he really liked it. Your food didn’t last long, you were both starving and it was exceptionally good.

You and Tom grew more and more tipsy as the night went on. You began to flirt with him some more too. You’d forgotten how much you enjoyed spending time with Tom.

“Oh here she comes,” you scoffed, rolling your eyes. Tom laughed, squeezing your hand in his.

“Do you need anything else?” she asked, her flirty gaze focused on Tom. You rolled your eyes, teasing your heel up his thigh under the table as you sipped on your drink. He coughed nervously, trying to ignore how close your foot was to his crotch.

“C-can we get another bottle of wine, please?” She nodded, leaving you both as you were.

“Spoiling me today are we?” you teased. He laughed, nodding his head. “Always, gorgeous.”

After your second bottle you didn’t waste much more time at the restaurant after paying the rather pricey bill, calling a taxi to take you back to the campus.

You could barely even stand straight by the time you were pushed up against your dorm room door. Your hands were working on unlocking it, struggling with the way his lips were attacking your neck and shoulders. You still weren’t wasted, but you could definitely feel the alcohol in your system, making everything feel lighter and Tom’s touch even more amplified than normal.

“So, when’s your roommate coming back?” he joked. You giggled quietly, throwing your jacket somewhere in the room. 

“Very funny, now shut up and just get in my bed.” He laughed loudly, picking you up by your thighs. You wrapped your legs around his waist, grinning up at him when he dropped you back on your bed. “Get ready for the night of your life,” he whispered, attaching his lips to your neck.

“I’ve been ready.” 

»»——⍟——««

Wednesday, 3rd April

As the months went by, the visits became less frequent, finding it increasingly more difficult to find time to actually physically go and see each other. Rather than at least once every two weeks, it started to be once in a while, and then eventually you wouldn’t see each other until the trip over Easter break. 

You both tried to call as much as you could, but you eventually started missing each other's calls more and more. It got to the point where you could not talk to each other for a minimum of 3 days, with the exception of a quick text in a morning or just before you went to sleep and the occasional voicemail.

It felt like everyday one of you was waking up to the notification of a missed call on your phone, followed by the message you’d received a voicemail. They all went the same way, a greeting, making some kind of light hearted joke that you’d manage to plan badly again, a simple i love you and then a call me when you get this.

When Easter time finally rolled around, painfully slowly, you and Tom were able to organise a time when the both of you would be free so you could plan the trip you wanted to take together.

The familiar sound of your ringtone blared through your dorm room, a small smile creeping onto your lips when you saw Tom’s contact picture lighting up your phone. The picture was an old one you’d taken of his a few years ago, reminding you that you should probably update it soon with a more recent one, that is if you had one.

“Hey, Tom,” you said, greeting him sweetly. You got a hello back, followed by a rather uncomfortable silence that the two of you had never experienced before. “So, um, where are you thinking we should go?” 

The man on the other end was biting his lip nervously, not sure if you’d like the sound of his idea or not, but this also had never happened before, so what was he supposed to do? He always came up with ideas you loved.

“I was thinking we could go to this cabin I found, really pretty view, um-“ He hated that he was unable to see your face right now, not able to see what kind of reaction you were giving off to his words. “You can say no of course, but I thought it’d be nice.” His voice trailed off towards the end and he spoke much quieter, almost like he was scared to hear your answer.

“That sounds really nice. I’d love to.” You could hear him let out a sigh of relief, the man feeling as though a weight had been lifted off of his chest.

“Great. I’ll make sure to call the place.” “I can’t wait.” 

When the day of your trip rolled around you were nervous. You hadn’t seen your boyfriend in forever and you weren’t sure if things were automatically going to jump back to the way they’d been, even if you were hoping they were.

Your eyes landed on Tom with a smile, the man opening his arms to you for a hug. You had no problem practically jumping at him, wrapping your arms around his neck tightly while his snaked around your waist to hold your body close.

“I missed you, so much,” he whispered, his nose buried in your neck to take you all in. You agreed silently, pulling back to be able to press your lips onto his sweetly, sharing your first kiss in months.

Tom had been generous enough to pick you up from your campus and then drive you both down to the cabin, rather than you having to drive yourself. The car ride was full of the stories you hadn’t been able to tell each other yet, filling what would’ve been an awkward silence.

You were more than happy to be back with him, and little did you know he felt the exact same.

However, it felt like for the first few days of the week that you weren’t really there. Of course you and Tom were both physically there but it felt like you were sending longing gazes and looks from a distance rather than really feeling that natural spark between you both.

You’d be sitting on the couch in the cabin, both of you in silence as you watched any random movie that played on the TV in front of you. Normally the two of you would be making constant unnecessary commentary throughout the duration, but here you were, sitting stiffly next to your boyfriend.

“What is wrong with us?” Tom asked. You turned your head, furrowing your eyebrows at the pretty boy who was staring right back at you with those puppy eyes. 

“What do you mean?” you asked. You had an idea that he was talking about the atmosphere between you both.

“This is so awkward, we- we’re usually so natural and us,” he complained. You sighed, leaning your head on his shoulder with the first display of affection that night.

“Yeah, I know. We’re probably just out of practice, right?” you suggested. You didn’t want to believe that your relationship could be going downhill, you were Y/N and Tom, that couldn’t possibly happen. “We’ve got this Tom, we’re still us.” 

That short conversation seemed to have worked. Over the next few days, and the last few remaining days of your trip, you and Tom were practically back to your normal ways. Your affection and love was able to come naturally again, calming all your racing thoughts about the pair of you drifting apart.

Unlike the past few days, now you’d be in the kitchen cooking, laughing and making jokes while having mini food fights. Or you’d be getting ready for bed, brushing your teeth when Tom would wrap his arms around you from behind and start placing kisses up and down your neck, making you flush and giggle sweetly. You spent your mornings sharing sweet words and kisses that made you completely weak for the man, and even thinking about giving it up again for who knows how long brought you physical sadness.

When it came to the time you had to leave you were obviously sad, more than you thought you’d be when this week began. You and Tom had almost managed to rebuild your relationship to the strength it once was, so now it was hurting just as much as the first time he left on that Friday in September.

He drove you back to your campus in mainly silence, the two of you keeping your fingers interlocked while he drove, soft music playing over the radio in the background. 

“How much longer?” you asked, hoping to have at least a little longer with him. He flashed you a small smile. “Under twenty minutes.” 

You sighed, feeling him squeeze your hand in response while his eyes stayed fixated on the road.

In a very short twenty minutes Tom was pulling into the College, parking quickly and turning off the car. The two of you just sat there for a minute, not saying anything but at the same time saying everything that needed to be said.

“Well, I guess this is it,” you said, turning to him with a sad smile. He nodded his head, lifting your hand from where it rested in your lap to place a gentle kiss on the back of it.

“‘m gonna miss you,” he whispered, leaning forward to rest his forehead comfortably against yours. You hummed, quickly pecking his lips.

“Don’t forget to call me, Holland,” you warned, pointing your finger at him playfully.

“Wouldn’t even dream of it.”

»»——⍟——««

Sunday, 29th May

By the time June was about to roll around you hadn’t seen Tom in almost two months.

He never did call, and the calls you left for him only ended up being missed. Everything had gone back to the way it was before. Almost two whole months. You still had faith in him, and almost everyday you’d wait to see if he’d call. Most of your calls to him would go straight to voicemail, so you simply gave up on putting in the effort.

It was the same routine everyday. Wake up, go to class, wait for Tom’s call, give up. Today was slightly different because you had plans for the night. You tried to wait as long as you could in your dorm to see if Tom would call, but when the clock hit six you gave up.

Some girls you’d begun to be friends with from your History class had invited you to a party they were going to, so to take your mind off your boyfriend not calling, you agreed to go. You did some light makeup, curling your hair like you knew Tom liked, then slipped on a black dress that would’ve made him drool.

You snapped a few pictures, some of just your face but then others of you in your dress too, debating on whether or not you wanted to post them to your account where Tom would definitely see. 

After staring at them for probably way too long, you gave in and did it anyway. You smiled as your friends gave nice comments, waiting to see absolutely anything from your boyfriend.

A sudden knock on your dorm door startled you away from your entrancement with your phone, opening it to see your new friends with large smiles. They held up a bottle of alcohol that would no doubt be for pre-drinks, making you laugh. You ignored their attempts at trying to get you to do a shot, telling them you were waiting on something from Tom. 

“Are you ready to go yet?” one of them asked. You sighed sadly and nodded.

“Let me just grab my purse,” you said, you walked back over to your bed, checking your phone one last time with a sigh, still nothing. 

“Alright, let’s go.” You smiled, closing your door behind you and heading off to the party to forget. You laughed together along the way, internally grateful for them trying to take your mind off your boyfriend.

But even in the party atmosphere, after they’d gone to get drinks or find someone to hook up with, you struggled to tear your eyes away from your phone. 

“Y/N, I don’t want to see this phone again,” Lainey said, holding two drinks in her hands. You were guessing she was already tipsy.

“Hey, fuck him okay? He’s the one missing out.” You giggled, thanking her and nodding. You put your phone in your bag out of sight and took the drink from her outstretched hand.

“Now, let’s party,” she announced, dragging you into the crowd of people where you’d end up being for the remainder of the night.

When you finally got back to your dorm after the party, it was the first time you checked your phone in hours. You saw a couple missed calls from Tom, as well as a voicemail. Your excitement from the night faded and your heart clenched, frowning that you’d missed him again. Even when you were waiting for any sign of contact from him, you weren’t expecting him to call you today and now you just felt guilty for mentally cursing him out earlier on.

You played the voicemail on speaker as you were taking your makeup off. The sound of Tom’s voice still made you feel all warm inside, even when you were mad at him, and you were addicted to the feeling.

“Hi beautiful, looks like I missed you again.” He laughed. “We really need to get better time management.” You nodded your head with a smile, agreeing. “I just wanted to hear your voice, I had a pretty shitty day and uh, yeah,” he paused. After hearing that you were able to hear the obvious signs of sadness lingering in his tone. “I saw your post by the way, you looked gorgeous, I hope wherever you went you had fun.” It was quiet for a few seconds.

“Call me when you get this, I love you.” 

Your heart ached, you didn’t know he’d had such a bad day. You planned on calling him back straight away, but upon noticing the time and realising that at three in the morning Tom would most likely be asleep, especially due to him having classes in the morning, you didn’t have much faith in him answering.

Just as you suspected, the call almost straight away went to voicemail, telling you to leave your message after the beep.

“Hey Tom, I’m so sorry I missed your call,” you started. “I-I was at this party and just got so caught up in it all, I didn’t even see my phone ring,” you paused, the line going silent again.

You knew when he listened to this voicemail that he’d hear how happy you sounded talking about the party. For now you knew you needed to say something else before the line cut you off.

“Well, I’m really sorry your day was bad. Call me back, I want to hear what happened, ‘nd know what I can do,” you told him. “I love you tom.”

Your eyes wouldn’t let you stay awake much longer after that. Letting you change into comfier clothes before you passed out for the night.

The next morning was a Monday, and you had absolutely nothing to do all day due to having no classes. You woke up earlier than you would’ve liked, having a quick snack for breakfast and then climbing back into your warm bed.

You pulled out one of the books Tom had bought you over Christmas, smiling as you traced the hardback cover. You could still vividly remember how happy you were the moment he’d given it to you.

“So I know I already got you something,” he stated, grabbing the wrapped book from out of his suitcase, “but I also know how much you’ve been wanting this.”

He placed the present in your hands. You thought it felt quite heavy, beginning to tear away the wrapping paper until the mystery was revealed. Your eyes widened as you read the front cover, over and over, just to make sure your eyes weren’t deceiving you. It was the same book that you’d been trying to find since its release, however it’d been sold out everywhere and you’d complained to your boyfriend countless times.

“Tom, oh my god,” you gasped, staring at him in shock, “How did you get this?”

“I have my ways.” His lips curved into a smirk and you pulled him into a tight hug, practically suffocating him.

“Thank you, you angel.” You kissed him softly, but it was a kiss that was filled with so much passion and adoration that it made your head spin. “You’re perfect.”

“I’m guessing this means you like it?” he teased. You rapidly nodded your head, even if he was being sarcastic.

“I adore you.”

You were engrossed with reading it for the next hour or so, a soft smile on your face as you got lost in the storyline. It was arguably unlike anything you’d ever read and you absolutely loved it.

The loud, blaring noise of your ringtone filled the silence in your room, making your heart leap, alerting you of an incoming phone call. You reached over to your nightstand, picking it up and glancing at the caller ID.

Seeing Tom’s name splayed across the screen made you smile, bringing the phone up to your ear after answering.

“Hi Tommy, I wasn’t expecting to hear from you today,” you said, smile wide as you answered the call. “I was just reading the book you got me for that one Christmas, d’you remember?” You heard him clear his throat, taking a deep breath before he spoke.

“I think we should talk.” Your heart dropped, smile falling from your face, putting down your book and sitting up straighter because he definitely didn’t sound happy.

“What?” you asked, following with a nervous laugh. It probably wasn’t what you thought it was right? It was just a harmless phone call. “Where is this coming from?”

Tom felt vulnerable. He was never one who was amazing at having deep conversations where he’d wear his heart on his sleeve. And he was positively in love with you, so this was torture. “I never talk to you anymore- We never talk anymore. You’re always out having fun and I-I feel like you don’t want to be with me now.” You frowned, tears beginning to cloud your eyes at his confession. You weren’t even aware he felt like that until now. You were glad he’d told you, but your heart ached at the idea of you making him feel like this unintentionally.

“Tom, I love you, with my whole heart and I-“ You heard his shaky breath and quiet sniffle down the phone line, your heart breaking at the sign he’d been crying- or maybe even still was. “Tom.” 

“No, I, it’s breaking my heart Y/N,” he cleared his throat. “I just-“ he stopped talking, sighing loudly. He was starting to get frustrated with himself. He didn’t know how to confess his feelings and it felt to him as though he was making it harder. 

You weren’t able to process what was happening right now. Your thoughts were running wild and you were scared to death that he was about to break your heart, something he promised he wouldn’t do when you started dating. As cliche as it sounds, you thought he was it for you. You weren’t able to picture anyone else in your life besides Tom, and even though you were young, you were certain this would be endgame.

You were crying now too, tears racing down your cheeks, dripping from your chin to your lap as you sniffled. You whimpered his name into the phone, prepared to fix this and fight for your relationship, you couldn’t lose him like this, not this easy. Part of you was hurting for him, you felt utter sympathy for what you’d been putting him through, you wish he’d told you sooner so you could’ve tried harder. But, another part of you was angry at him, for springing this onto you so suddenly, for doing it over the phone and for being so selfish.

“What are you saying?” you asked, your voice coming out weak and filled with obvious desperation. “Tom, please, I can’t lose you.”

There was a few moments of silence. A few hours away from you Tom was sitting alone in his dorm room. At least he thought he was alone. For the entirety of the phone call Harrison had been standing outside of their dorm room. He was about to enter when he heard Tom talking on the phone, not wanting to interrupt he decided to wait, but the course of the call clearly took a turn from the usual lovey-dovey conversations he overheard.

Tom had his knees pulled up to his chest, his head leaning back against the wall and his bottom lip tugged between his teeth as he played out all the things that could happen from now on in the call.

He was evidently stressed, tears streaked across his cheeks as he took shaky breaths to push down his sobs. “I-I think we should talk about this another time,” he said, the sound of a small sniffle following down the phone. You squeezed your eyes shut, more tears spilling down your cheeks.

You didn’t know what that meant. Did he want to break up? Did he want to fix things? When was another time? There were so many questions floating around unanswered and you wanted to scream at him for leaving things so open ended.

“I-I don’t understand. We can figure this out- Please.” Your voice broke towards the end, showing your pain through to the man who was struggling to hold back all of his emotions. 

He hated knowing he’d put you in pain but his own heart was hurting too, and it was almost like part of his resented you for that.

He gave up a little bit, deciding he couldn’t do this anymore, not today. “I’ll call you some other time Y/N. Goodbye.” You let out a sob as the line went silent. 

Tom, for one, hadn’t told you he loved you when ending the call, and two, he’d said goodbye. The one thing you promised that you wouldn’t say to each other while you were gone, a promise you made on the very first day he left. It was always, see you later, and now you didn’t know where you both stood.

When Harrison heard the call ended he took it as his chance to enter his room, only to find Tom with his head buried in his hands as he tried to muffle his heartbroken cries.

“Hey, man.” The brunette looked up nervously, furiously wiping his eyes and trying to pretend as though he hadn’t just been bawling his eyes out. “You okay?” he asked. 

Tom wasn’t an idiot. He knew he looked a mess, he knew Harrison noticed, and he didn’t particularly feel up to lying right now. He just needed a friend.

“No,” he answered honestly. Harrison frowned, taking a seat next to Tom on his bed. The two hadn’t been that close since becoming roommates, but were much closer than when they’d first met.

Harrison pulled Tom close to him in a friendly hug. He hadn’t quite been through a breakup so he didn’t know what to say to Tom to help him, but for Tom this was enough.

“Things will get better, I promise.” He shook his head, almost laughing at how ridiculous his roommate sounded right now.

“I don’t think they will. Not anymore.” 

»»——⍟——««

Thursday, 3rd June

It got to the point where you hadn’t heard from Tom in four days. You were almost sure it was over at this point if he didn’t call you soon. You’d tried calling him of course, left countless voicemails and texts, as well as the ones to wish him a happy birthday, something you were rather upset you missed.

You’d barely left your bed in days, it felt like you were too heartbroken to even move. Little did you know Tom was exactly the same. He’d overthought everything he’d done, refusing to speak to anyone but Harrison, who was only making sure he still ate and drank, meaning he missed lots of messages and calls on his birthday.

With a lot of persuading and guilt tripping from his roommate he finally decided to do something about it. “You need to talk to her, mate. Don’t let this ruin everything you have.” 

After that he showered for the first time in days, which Harrison was very grateful for, and got dressed and was ready to head out with one last burst of reassurance to himself.

When you heard the knock on your dorm door you didn’t even consider moving to see who it was, choosing instead to keep ignoring the world like you’d been doing for the last near week. You’d ignored pretty much everyone that had tried to see if you were still alive this week, messages from friends included.

It was only when the knocking became more urgent that you started to get frustrated. Normally after a few short minutes your friends would give up and just leave, but this only seemed to be carrying on.

You groaned, wiping your dried tears and pushing yourself out of bed begrudgingly. You didn’t care that you looked like a mess anymore, so you didn’t care that this person, whoever it was, was going to see you like this. 

You pulled open the door open rather angrily, your eyes widening in shock when you saw Tom standing there with a bag on his shoulder, looking almost as broken as you did, but possibly more cleaned up as he’d actually made an effort.

You didn’t know how to react at first. You didn’t know where the two of you currently stood and you didn’t want to push his boundaries, but seeing him standing there told you he was ready to fix this. When he flashed you a small smile you didn’t waste another second, nearly flinging yourself into his arms, almost crushing whatever it was he was holding.

“Oh, thank god,” you cried, wrapping your arms around his torso. You were scared he wouldn’t hug you back at first, confirming what you thought about your relationship truly being over. That wasn’t the case though. Tom wrapped his free arm around your shoulders, squeezing you tightly in his grasp, his hand drifting to the back of your head to keep you tight against him.

The two of you thrived being in each other’s touch again after so long without it, feeling as though your heart was finally mended again. 

You were reluctant to pull away. However, you unfortunately had to at some point. You led him inside your room, trying to quickly tidy at least a little bit of your mess that had collected over the past few days, even if that meant just making your bed for you both to sit on.

Tom set whatever had been in his hands down on your desk and then placed his bag on your floor before sitting down next to you on your bed, finally letting you see the mini cake he’d brought with him. You felt your heart flutter, the idea that he still wanted to be able to celebrate his birthday with you was too precious for you to handle.

You didn’t talk for a few minutes, messing with the sleeves on your jumper that was probably Tom’s as you waited for him to talk.

“Y/N,” he said, watching as you raised your head to look at him. “C’mere.”

He opened his arms for you, not feeling physically close enough to you as he wanted to be. He helped you crawl into his lap, your legs thrown over his while your face tucked into his neck. His hand rubbed up and down your back when he felt the way you were shaking slightly.

You were trying to string together the sentence of words you wanted to say to him but for some reason it was just too emotional for you.

“I-I was so scared Tommy,” you admitted. “I didn’t want us to be over,” you cried.

Tom hated seeing you like this, knowing that he’d been putting you through this for days without returning your calls or messages, even if he was no better on the other side of the phone. He shook his head, cupping your cheeks and making you look at him so he knew his words would sink in. He gently wiped away your tears, even if they just kept on coming.

“I would never, I promise,” he said. “I could never let you go that easily, not without trying to make it right. I’m sorry for putting you through that.” You smiled, for the first time in days.

“Good, you’re too hot to leave me,” you teased. He chuckled, shaking his head at you. “I’m sorry too, by the way. I didn’t know I was hurting you.” 

It fascinated you that all you needed was to apologise and pretty much all was forgiven. Things clearly weren’t going back to normal straight away but you were glad you were able to at a minimum not break up.

The whole moment felt like something from a movie. Tom was looking so lovingly into your eyes, silently pouring all his love for you in the simple action of holding you while his thumb stroked your cheekbone. You looked back with an exact reflection of his own emotions, your heart feeling as though it was mending everything that had broken it this past week.

Tom took the moment to lean down to kiss you, his lips curving into a frown when you turned your head for his lips to meet your cheek.

“Why can’t I kiss you?” he whined. He looked like a scolded puppy, his expression bringing a smile to your lips. Your expression changed though when you remembered why you didn’t let him kiss you, letting out a huff that twisted into a frown. Tom gently kissed away the crease that had formed between your brows, your face heating up at the simple gesture of love.

“You said goodbye,” you said, hitting his chest lightly. He cocked his head in confusion. “What?” he asked, innocence lacing his tone.

“On the phone. You said goodbye, and you told me we wouldn’t do that.” 

He could tell you were getting worked up again, his hands coming up to wipe any stray tears that fell. “Oh bub, I’m sorry. I’m an idiot for doing that over the phone,” he apologised, tucking a few loose strands of hair behind your ear to keep it out of your eyes.

You smiled at him, letting him think you’d forgiven him enough to finally let him kiss your lips. He leaned in again, only inches away this time when you pulled your head back, giggling quietly to yourself as he let out an audible groan.

“Now what?” he asked.

“You need to tell me what that cake is for first,” you grinned. He rolled his eyes, reaching over as much as he could to grab it from your desk.

“I thought, seeing as we missed my birthday, we could celebrate together a little late.” 

Your heart melted as he confirmed your thoughts. You rested your head against his shoulder, letting out a sigh as you allowed your eyes to close for a few seconds.

“I missed you,” you mumbled. It was something the two of you said a lot, but even then every time was just as true as the next. He hummed quietly, kissing the top of your head lovingly.

“I know, I missed you too.” You gave in this time when he gently guided your chin so you were looking up at him, letting him press his lips to yours gently. Your hand snaked into the hair at the back of his head, keeping him close to you so he couldn’t pull away from you prematurely.

When your lips parted you rested your forehead against his, your eyes tracing the freckles that decorated the skin of his nose and cheeks. 

He lifted his hands up slightly, a motion to show the object he was holding. “So, how about some cake?” 

You let a soft giggle slip past your lips, nodding your head as you wiped away and excess tears that still remained on your face. Tom rummaged through a few things in his bag until he found some utensils to eat the cake with, making you laugh at how he’d come so prepared.

“Happy late birthday to me,” he said, taking a bite of the cake with a content look on his face. You hummed, watching him with complete adoration glittering in your eyes.

“Happy late birthday, Tommy.” 

The two of you ate in a comfortable silence, relishing in the fact you were back together again. Your mind was brought back to the bag you’d seen him bring, catching his attention long enough to ask him a question.

“Are you planning on staying?” you asked, trying to contain any excitement just in case you’d end up getting your hopes up. He nodded, trying to suppress his grin as he saw your eyes light up. “I want to take the time to make this right again, Y/N,” he admitted. “As long as it takes.” 

You agreed, pressing another kiss to his soft lips. “As long as it takes.” 

━━━━━━━━━♡♥♡━━━━━━━━━

tom holland taglist → @seutarose​ @lmaotshollandd​ @photoshopart15​ @hopelessly-harry​ @call-me-baby-gir1​ @icyhollands​ @sinisterspidey​ @siriuslyslyslytherin​ @musicalkeys-blog​ @itstaskeen​ @tpwk-grande​ @zspideyy​ @spideyssunshine​ @givebuckyhisplumsnow​ @lowkey-holland​ @hollandcrush​ @wizkiddx​ @sannie-san-shine​ @sonnydoesrandomshit​ @hopeless-romantic-baby​ @thehumanistsdiary​ @dummiesshort​ @itsbieberxholland​ @lillucyandthejets​ @piscesparker​ @bvttercupbby​ @mymilliefrommarketing​ @spideyspeaches​ @kujokura @l0velyevans​ @jess-holland23​ @felicityparkers​ @quxxnxfhxll​ @captainamirica​ @tomsirishgirlx​ @lou-la-lou​ @slutforsr​ @tayyx​ @bora-world​ @annathesillyfriend​ @lovableparker @whoeveniskendall @hollandswife @sunwardsss @dhtomholland @messedupmyfuckinglife @bi-lmg @londonspidey @multixfandomwriter @mrsholland96 @tomhollandismyhusband1996 @just-lost-inbetween-worlds @magicalxdaydream @hallecarey1 @aayaissaa

[meloswifeyyy]

Relationship Alphabet

A - Attitude

Who often has the worst Attitude ?

Well, you obviously. Most of the time because you are hungry or you and Melo just got out of an argument. Melo usually fucks the attitude out of you anywhere, anytime tho.

B - Baby

Who wants Babies the most - first ?

Melo. He often jokes about having kids or when you are having sex he would whisper in your ear  “You trynna have my babies?” or  “You boutta have my babies ” when he nuts in you. He says that he wants 3 or more. You only want 2. You arent rushing into it.

C - Crying 

Who Cries the most in the relationship ?

You. You often cry alone when you miss Melo when he is at away games for so long. Or when your BP triggers, Melo would comfort you. When watching sad movies, or when someone you love dies. Tears of joys appear here and there. Or when you get into arguments and Melo says something wrong or disrespectful out of madness.

D - Dates 

Who has the best Date spots ?

Melo. He would often take you to fancy restaurants in L.A or Miami, or wherever you guys went. Or take you shopping at an expensive place. He would do dates at home like watching movies, have you cook dinner because he cant cook for shit, or he would have a bath waiting on you. 

E - Eat 

Who Eats the most ?   

You. You know damn well you cant survive without food. Its the 2nd best thing that has ever happened to you besides life and Melo. Cant even survive a night. If you would wake up in the middle of the night and get hungry and go to kitchen and try to sneak some food without waking Melo up, he would hear it and go to the kitchen and scare you, picking you up over his shoulder with one arm, and with the other putting the food away carrying you back to the bed because its a little to early in the morning to be eating. 

F - Freak 

Who is the Freakiest ?  

Both of you. You being the only girl that can fuck Melo like you do, and being the only girl Melo is sexually, physically, and mentally attracted to no other girl can do it like you.10/10 in bed. Now Melo on the other hand is a demon in bed. His strokes, hitting your G - Spot constantly with you feeling it in your guts. His 9 inch is almost  always on hard when he is around you. And his tongue is crazy, going in and out and on the pearl AT THE SAME TIME. Crazy right. Spelling his name out on you. He loves when you scratch his back up or give him hickeys everywhere. 10000/10. Makeup sex is the best. 

G - Games 

Who wins the most games ?  

Melo. He would always dare you to a game of Call of Duty or Fortnite to see who would win first. And he would always win. When you would play a game of Uno you would often win and he would be mad the rest of the day due to his competitiveness. But any other game he would win.

H - Happy

Who is the Happiest in the relationship ?  

Both of you. You are always happy when you guys are around each other. Even when you guys just got done arguing you are still happy that he is in your presence. Melo on the other hand is always happy with you around him, he loves to cuddle with you. Its one of his favorite thing to do. He just loves that you are in his presence. You are his other half.

I - Irreplaceable

Who is the most Irreplaceable ?  

You would say Melo but Melo would say you. Melo knows how to deal with you more than anyone else does. He knows all your spots and what you like and dont like. He notices all of your flaws and sees the good and beautiful in them. He knows your body, mind, and soul. No man has a better or brighter or bigger smile than him. He always brightens the mood. You on the other hand are different. A big beautiful smile. You know how to deal with Melo when he is sad, looses a game. You can tell when he is lying or telling the truth just by looking through his eyes. You know how to make him happy. You are the best he has ever had.

J - Jaded 

Who gets the most Jaded after doing something ?

Melo. He usually gets really bored after sitting in the house all day. He really wants to leave the house and do something fun but usually its night time and you would be taking a nap or would be sleep. 

K - Kisses

Who gives the most kisses?

Melo. He is always so clingy and that comes with all the kisses in the world. He kisses you all over your face in your sleep, even when you are sleep he gives you kisses. He loves to kiss all over your body.

L - Love

Who fell in love the fastest?

Melo. He had always had a crush on you and everyone knew you were the one for him. You just didn’t know it until you two started dating. He’s always making sure you are good. He loves your hugs. He was the first one to say “I love you”. He want kids you to have all 10 of his kids.

M - Motivation

Who gives the most motivation?

You. When melo is going to a game and is not having a good feeling about it you motivate him to push through it and win for you. 9/10 he will win or get a lot of points for you.

N - Night Owl

Who is more of a Night Owl?

Both of you. Sometimes when his ADHD is on 10 you guys stay up and listen to music, play games, go on ig live, or just fuck for 7 hours straight. Sometimes you have to tell him to got to sleep or put him to sleep (😏) because he has a game tomorrow and needs all the rest and energy he can get. It also the same for you.

O - Oral Sex

Who gives Oral Sex the most?

Melo. Trust me, you give him head a lot and it’s amazing, 10/10. But melo loves giving you head. He loves to spell his name out on you. Loves to see the faces to make you scream and shout. Loves sharing your cream with you (🥲). He loves to climb under the blanket while you are sleep for some breakfast in bed. Maybe even dinner. His lips make it even better. So glad he don’t got them white genes in his lips (😋😭).

P - Perfect

Whos perfect?

Obviously, no ones perfect but God (🙏🏾). But in your eyes no one else is better for you except melo. You couldnt imagine living life without him. Cant imagine what anyones elses kids would look like with you but. No relationship is perfect. Melo sees you as perfect. Your body. Your style. Your personality. He absolutely loves your touch. He loves touch but for you loving your touch is an understatement. He couldnt imagine his kids with anyone else but you. Cant imagine getting married with anyone else. When you guys get into arguments and sleep in seperate rooms. You barely get sleep because all you can think about is each other. How perfect you guys are for one another.

Q - Q? (Cant find a word, Tell me one and ill edit it.)

R - Relate

What traits do you guys have a like each other?

A lot. Both of your favorite food is Chicken tacos. You both love a good game of Uno. You both love sex. Duhh. Both of you guy’s love language is touch. Love playing fortnite together. Love listening to music and taking drives together. Both love lil uzi (we pretending yall💀). Just in general you guys are very alike.

S - Sex

(No question for this one lol. Y’all already know how we is round hea nahhmeannn😭)

The sex. Omgggg. The first time you and melo had sex was. So amazing. Can’t ever forget that moment. Melo is always so horny. Morning sex is the best. Sometimes a little top at the red light can turn into a few rounds in back of the McDonalds parking lot. Lucky enough all his windows tinted as hell. Or in the Victoria’s Secret fitting rooms. You guys could be listening to Chris Brown and he would really take you down, fuck you back to sleep, switch up the tempo, or make you wet the bed (i’m laughing hard ash). The hickeys. The high sex. Drunk sex (drunnnnkkk in lovvveee). Car sex. Balcony sex. All over the house sex ( i got bars.) Mad sex and Make up sex. I could go on. Sex with me so amazinggggg. (i was listening to this song while writing this one💀😫😫😫)

T - Trips

Who likes taking trips internationally?

Melo. He love to take you and a yearly or even monthly vacay. Just you and him. Turks and Caicos. Bora Bora. Jamaica. Iceland. Japan. Africa. Anywhere where you can get away from the world. The different places. The hotels. Being able to fuck anywhere and everywhere. The pools. The different air. (united states ait is so boring). The new food. The animals. You guys love the new places. He loves to see you happy and with a smile on your face.

U - U (Cant find a word, Tell me one and ill edit it.)

V - V (Cant find a word, Tell me one and ill edit it again.)

W - Right the Wrongs

Who rights their wrongs after an argument?

Usually it would be you first. If you said something that was out of pocket or melo didnt like you woukd quickly apologize. He would forgive you and still cuddle and kiss you and stuff because thats what he does. Tease you. But he would ignore you until he actually forgave you in his head. Melo would apologize and give you some bomb ass d for and apology. Or make that cute face that you can’t resist.

X - (Can’t find a word for X. Give me a suggestion and i will edit it)

Y - Young

Who acts like a Young ass child?

Both of you actually. That’s what makes you love each other the most. The laughs and jokes, the tv shows, everything you could think of. It’s nothing wrong with it at all. Y’all are always gonna bust a joke out at the right time. Maybe sometimes even the wrong time. (damn, double homicide). You guys love laughing with each other.

Z - ZZZ

Who has the worst sleeping habits?

Probably Melo. If you scooted over him even a little bit, he would probably scoot back closer to you or pull you back over to him. And the only con of that is he snores a lot. (Why this nigga snore with his mouth open?🤨💀). Sometimes if he was awake and you werent he would kiss all over you. He loves to lay on your 🍒.

Y’all welcome. I haven’t pose the one of these in a minute. This took me a whole month and a half. I’m tired as hell. 💀

[karlsjackbox]

the end. | irl!quackity x gn!reader

A VIEW OF two people falling out of love.

type: angst

warnings: taking pills (brief, not much context), swearing, fight, death threat

w/c: 1.6k

quackity pushed his hair out of his face, fingers placing themselves in a rhythm on the keyboard. music played through his headphones, placed on the second to last volume to help soothe his aching headache. eyes traveling to the corner of the screen, his eyebrows furrowed at the sight of it being 4:57am. rubbing his eyes, he leaned back and let out a sigh. saving the document he was writing on, quackity shut off the monitor and shuffled his feet.

the door across the room opened. snapping his eyes forward, quackity was met with his s/o holding their cat, tired smile adorning their face. quackity mirrored the smile, pushing himself off of the chair and standing beside his love. “you’re awake late.” he muttered, though his words slurred together. y/n looked at him with a lopsided grin, pressing a short kiss to his lips. “couldn’t sleep without you.” quackity gasped, using his hands to cover tiger’s eyes.

the paired laughed, dragging themselves to the bedroom.

it had been a few weeks. y/n’s eyes forced themselves open, bed empty beside them. quackity was laughing down the hallway, having to ignored the text from y/n asking him to tone down just a little. rubbing their eyes, y/n sat up and tapped on their phone. 4:23 am. muttering a curse to themself, they laid back down. shutting their eyes, y/n eventually fell asleep to the sound of their boyfriends muffled laughter and curses.

quackity ended the stream near 5am. he leaned back with a sigh, rubbing his face as the discord call eventually dropped. grabbing his phone, he check notifications and read the text from y/n with a frown. he texted a quick sorry ! just saw this :( coming to bed now <3. with no text back, he pushed himself off of the chair and shuffled his way to the bedroom. tiger rubbed against his leg, the mexican biting a smile back. y/n laid curled up, body facing the wall as they snored quietly. 

quackity shuffled out of his day clothes, sliding into pajamas as he laid beside y/n and fell asleep.

y/n danced around the kitchen, music playing quietly through their phone as they made their breakfast. they hummed along, carefully pouring their cereal into their bowl. scratching their chin, they turned at the noise of somebody behind them. quackity stood in the doorway, hair messed up from sleep. “hi, my love.” y/n greeted.

taking a minute to answer, quackity shut off his phone and sighed. “good morning.” he sat down at the table, rubbing his eyes. “whats up?” y/n asked, pouring their milk and grabbing a spoon from the drawer. they sat across from quackity, who had picked up his phone as it buzzed. 

“tommy wants me to record today and george wants me on his stream. i’m trying to make them both work and i just don’t know if i can.” quackity explained, using his hand for more emphasize. y/n swallowed the cereal before answering, crossing their legs at the ankle. “i think you need a day off.” they huffed, eyes rolling. “i wish.” quackity responded, standing to make his own cereal.

“i’m serious. we haven’t spent time together in forever.” y/n shrugged, getting no response. “i can try for soon, but definitely not today.” quackity kissed y/n’s temple before he sat across from them again.

quackity didn’t talk to y/n until the next afternoon.

y/n sat on the couch, holding a mug of hot cocoa. their legs were crossed, eye trained to the television screen as rapunzel played. they hummed along to the songs, turning at the sound of footsteps. quackity held his phone to his ear, laughing at something somebody said.

y/n smiled at him and gave a short wave, quackity repeating the wave and making his way into the kitchen. the refrigerator door opened and closed, y/n turning their head and resuming the movie. 

quackity took out the strawberry container from the fridge and made his way into the living room, standing at the doorway as he listened to karl talk. eventually he tossed the container away, finishing the strawberries and going back upstairs to his recording room.

by the time the movie finished, the sun was barely kissing the horizon. turning spotify on through the tv, music started to play through the playlist, ‘y/n & quackity!!’. y/n smiled at the memory of them sitting together and making the playlist on their second date.

making their way into the kitchen, y/n opened the cabinet and pulled out the pasta noodles. pulling out a pot and filling it with water, they began to boil it and dump in the noodles. their phone gave a simple ding! and another notification came through.

alex<3: can u plz turn music down? streaming soon x

y/n frowned, though gave a simple thumbs up. they tapped the spoon on the side of the bowl and left it to drip, entering the living room and shutting of the tv in a whole. tiger sat on the couch, head peeking up with a quiet ‘mrrp?’ as the noise suddenly ended. cooing, y/n walked over and scooped him up, cradling him as they made their way into the kitchen again to stir the pasta.

setting tiger down on the floor after 15 minutes, y/n scooped the pasta into two seperate bowls and ran butter through them. deciding against sauce, y/n placed the bowls on the table and texted quackity.

you: made pasta !! <3

the food was still untouched by the next morning.

it had been a while since then. y/n woke up before quackity. they were faced with his back, black sweatshirt hugging his body. they sat up slowly, sun fading through the curtains and hitting the blanket. they shivered a little, blinking hard a few times to try and wake themselves up. after a few more moments, they pulled their legs out from underneath the blanket and carefully moved away from quackity and out of the room.

quackity woke up an hour or so later, groaning softly as the sun had now positioned itself to hit his eyes directly. he sat up, head turning to look at y/n. frowning as nobody was there, he picked up his phone and drug himself out of the room. the house was empty as he searched around for his s/o, frown adorning his face.

standing in front of the fridge, a sticky note hung to it.

quackity ripped off the sticky note, crumbling it in his pocket as he opened the fridge to search for his breakfast.

y/n returned home that night to the noise of muffled swears and laughter, though y/n wore mainly a frown. their bones ached and a headache roared. sighing, they dropped their bag and kicked off their shoes and made their way into the bathroom. they opened the medicine cabinet and took out tylenol, swallowing the pill with sink water in their mouth.

rubbing their nose, y/n made their way upstairs to their bedroom. they grabbed clean clothes and made their way into the bathroom, turning on the shower and letting the water run until it was hot. they stripped and dropped their clothes onto the floor, pushing them into the corner before stepping into the shower. y/n couldn’t help the sigh that escaped their mouth as everything from the day washed away, lathering their hair with shampoo and conditioner.

quackity ended the stream around the same time that y/n stepped out of the shower. he sat at his desk for a moment longer, chatter with his friends slowly dying down. “hey guys, i’m gonna head off now.” after a wave of goodbyes, he left the discord call and stood up.

quackity made his way into the bedroom, y/n sat on the edge of the bed. sliding off his beanie, quackity ruffled his hair and let himself fall beside his s/o. they didn’t talk, y/n texting somebody before shutting off their phone. they let out a sigh and rubbed their face, tossing their phone beside them.

curling up, y/n and quackity fell asleep facing each other for the last time.

they woke up at the same time. y/n sat up and rubbed their eyes, yawn falling from their mouth. there was a tension in the room quackity couldn’t figure out. “hey, wanna watch a movie?” y/n asked, scratching their nose as they met eyes with their sleepy boyfriend. “mm.. i can’t. i have homework and i have to be on a stream,” quackity slurred, missing how y/n’s eyebrows furrowed. tsking, y/n stood. “right.”

quackity’s head shot up at their tone. “what do you mean?” he questioned, choosing to stay silent on their eye roll. “you haven’t spent time with me in ages. i’m shocked i even fell asleep with you beside me.” the younger shrugged, opening their closet to pull out a sweatshirt.

“yeah, because its my job? the fuck do you mean?” quackity sat up, leaning his weight on his hands. “okay? you can still make time for me. i’m not just somebody who feeds you, alex.” y/n turned to meet his eyes, hands resting on their hips. “i can handle myself, you know.” quackity rolled his eyes.

“i wanna see you fucking try.”  y/n looked the older up and down. “you just mooch off of me anyway. if you’re so pissy about me working then leave.” quackity seethed, anger radiating off of me. he froze as the words fell out of his mouth, y/n’s hands dropping. “i hope you fucking starve. waste of space.” y/n cursed, turning and grabbing their bag from the closet.

“y/n, i didn’t-- we didn’t mean that.” quackity apologized, stepping towards the younger. y/n stayed silent, shoving random clothes into their backpack. quackity didn’t try to fight them, standing and watching them pack with tears brimming his eyes.

“..is it the end for us?” it was silent. the silence pushed against quackity’s skull, taunting him in a way he would remember forever. y/n turned, face blank as their eyes were puffy.

“it was the end a long time ago.”