#this interview is full of gems

[astrangetorpedo]

Catching Up with Lucy Dacus and Fenne Lily

by Lucy Dacus | 11/13/20

Lucy Dacus is a Richmond, Virginia-based singer-songwriter and one-third of the folk supergroup boygenius; Fenne Lily is Bristol, UK-based singer-songwriter whose album BREACH was released in September by Dead Oceans. For this phone call, the two friends set out to dive deep on their recent dreams, and ended up taking in much, much more.

— Annie Fell, Talkhouse Senior Editor

Fenne: Before this call, I was just looking you up. Is that weird?

Lucy: You were listening to my music?

Fenne: Yeah!

Lucy: That’s so funny, I was listening to your music. “I, Nietzsche.”

Fenne: [Laughs.] You actually were one of the many reasons why I broke up with the guy that that song is about.

Lucy: Oh, my god, I didn’t like him at all.

Fenne: Do you remember? It was literally the first time I met you, pretty much, or maybe the second time. I was with him and he tried to pull me out of the conversation because he wanted to go home or something — probably to read Nietzsche. And you were like, “Don’t touch my girl like that.” And I was like, Lucy Dacus just called me her girl, and I need to leave this boy. [Laughs.]

Lucy: I felt quickly defensive of you. We had hardly met, but he was just acting so brutish. It was like, Damn, who is this guy? It was so brutish that I thought maybe you didn’t even know him, but then you were like, “No, I’m actually with him.”

Fenne: Yeah, he’s been inside me. [Laughs.] I mean, you’re someone who makes good decisions, so you’re probably not going to answer this with a yes, but have you ever been with someone that you’re like, “I can’t believe that I gave them my body, and my heart.”

Lucy: Yeah, I am easily disgusted by the idea of some of the people that I used to really have tenderness for. But then I realize, that was not a bad quality, to be able to find good things about a bad person. Even that’s tough, to call someone just a straight up bad person, but someone that I really don’t like now, I try not to be like, I’m such an idiot. That was just a part of growing, realizing that just because they have a couple good qualities doesn’t mean that they have to be my life partner.

Fenne: Yeah, I mean, I like to think of the really bad relationships I’ve been in as, like, an exercise in compassion, to an extent where now retrospectively I can see that they were manipulating me. But at the time, I was so ready to be like, You’re just an injured soul and you need a safe place, and I can be that place. But that should only be for a time. And I think I’ve definitely seen people in those relationships for a long time and it starts wearing away at them, and the way that you see yourself like personally. So as much it’s a practice in being able to see past someone’s bad qualities, I know that there’s a cutoff point for that. But yeah, thanks for protecting me. [Laughs.]

Lucy: Yeah, I think that was actually after I went through my long, drawn out, like, worst relationship. And I think that since then, I’ve been overly defensive probably. Or I just love my friends so much that I feel like nobody deserves them, and I’m just like, and I’m just like, “Go away!” to most people that my friends date. That’s not totally true, but it’s like a recurring feeling. But yeah, I hardly knew you so I was probably overstepping a bound by trying to defend you.

Fenne: It made my heart soar, and I honestly felt safe. But you have that lyric that goes, “You don’t deserve what you don’t respect,” and I always kind of thought that you were singing about yourself, but maybe you’re singing generally about people that you love also.

Lucy: Yeah, I definitely thought it about other people first, because it’s easier to defend other people than yourself. And then I realize, I should take my own advice, but I’m still not so good at that. But I think I’m better at it.

Fenne: Do you ever find yourself writing yourself as a character so that you can make clearer judgments on your own shit? Like, do you ever make yourself the third person so you can be like, “Lucy should do this.”

Lucy: A lot of people I know great as a character, but I have no such self-control. I definitely wish that I could write it as an exercise, but writing often just feels sort of like throwing up. You know what I mean? All of a sudden it’s just there, and you don’t necessarily want it to be there, an inconvenience. And I don’t really know what I’m saying until the song is written. Like, I would really love to be able to say, like, Oh, I’d like to process this event in my life, or this thought, — I will make art about it. But that has never been a skill. I feel like all my songs start as subconscious vomit.

Fenne: I agree. I thought you were going to go the opposite direction, because as a person, you seem like someone who thinks before they speak and considers the weight and the repercussions of what they’re saying. So it’s interesting that your process doesn’t reflect what I see in your character, in that sense.

Lucy: I think it’s easier to talk to other people than to myself. I think that I carry a weight of, like, you know, say-what-you-mean when I’m talking to other people, but I don’t have a practice of talking like that to myself. So it’s just kind of forced upon me sometimes, that I end up talking to myself through writing a song. Is that how you write? Do you actually sit down and say, “I’m going to write about this,” and then you write a song about what you intend to write about?

Fenne: No, I have very little foresight or planning or structure to any part of my life, and it is definitely affecting the way I work. I literally get to the point where I haven’t written in so long that I’m furious at myself for not doing anything. And I sit down, and it is like word vomit. I’m like, Something’s coming out, I’m just going to let it happen, because if I don’t, it might never happen again. And often, I’m writing and I don’t know why I’m writing from the perspective I’m writing from.

At the moment I am in a relationship that I am really comfortable in, and he makes me feel brilliant most of the time, I still feel these inexplicable periods of sadness that almost make me feel guilty, because he obviously sees me going through this and maybe thinks it’s a reflection on him. And often those are the feelings that come out when I’m writing. I think it’s a hangover from being a kid and being unable to talk about how I feel to my family, despite the fact that they’re really emotionally intelligent people and completely up fo talking about feelings, I was almost rebelling against that. So I started writing at that time because I literally couldn’t get out my feelings in any other way. I feel like I still do that, where I’m subconsciously storing up fuel to then speak to myself about songs, rather than having to vocalize it in words. So it’s never a case of being like, I’m gonna write a song about global warming — although now that I’ve said that, maybe I should do that. [Laughs.]

Lucy: I feel like it’s really rare to write about topical things and have it actually be good. I have some family members who are just like, “You should really write a song about everything that’s going on in these uncertain times!” And I’m just like, no. I just feel like my perspective isn’t necessary — just, like, as a white person, I simply don’t need to be taking up space. I’m grateful I have a platform that I can put other voices onto, with the literal easiest thing ever of resharing things.

But yeah, I think it could be useful for you to do a song about global warming, I hope you end up writing one. That’d be awesome. But don’t be tacky — it’s weird to be like, Oh, this is topical. It just it ends up feeling really tacky, I think, as a listener.

Fenne: I think to an extent, everything that I’ve written during this pandemic situation… I haven’t written a lot, I’ve feeling really unconnected to myself, and the world, and feeling really weird. But in a sense, everything that you’re writing is about the fucked up stuff that’s going on, even if it’s not directly preaching. I feel like the way you and I write is naturally diaristic, and doesn’t feel completely separate from the stuff that’s going on. You’re quite a permeable person emotionally, I think, and I definitely am. It’s inescapable that outside stuff is inevitably going to become part of the material, even if you if you don’t say, “Trump” and “Brexit” and the whole thing.

But you’re right. I mean, I’m dreading next year when all these quarantine albums come out, where all the songs are going to be called like, “Masked and Alone,” and “My Wifi’s Too Slow.” Have you been writing a lot during this period, or have you been feeling a bit dead?

Lucy: I actually have been writing a lot because, I think I end up writing to escape the present and to not think about the future. I feel like most of my creative life comes from the past. Thinking about the future is scary and living in the present is scary, and the past is certain, it can’t be changed. It’s static. I journal, so I’ve been rereading my journals and kind of remembering some emotional things that I haven’t really put to rest yet, and so that’s just kind of ending up being what I’m writing about right now. And then I might write about what’s happening in the year 2020 in, like, 2025. Do you ever have a dialogue about where you’re writing about something like many years after?

Fenne: Yeah, 100 percent. This record that I just released, when I first started writing for it, it [was] really important for me to reflect the growth that I feel I’ve experienced since the first album came out. That was kind of my first thing — I was like, I need to almost prove that I changed, if not just to myself, to people that are listening to the music.

And then as I started writing, there was a lot of stuff coming up. I was having these conversations with my mum about why I always feel angry rather than sad as my go-to feeling, and how I always feel panicky very fast. And she was telling me that when I was born, I didn’t have that big intake of breath that normal births provide — I was a cesarean, I just got cut out — and she was like, “For the first year of the life, you were crying if you weren’t held and you were always in pain and your spine was all weird and you just were not comfortable in your skin.” That was so interesting to hear that, because I genuinely feel like I haven’t really changed that much from how I came into the world. I definitely think there’s something to be said for your entrance into the world influencing how you exist in that world. So as much as I’m like, I really want to write about being 21, I feel like I also want to talk about being two again. It wasn’t a conscious thing, but it happened.

But you’re right about the past, it isn’t going to change, and thinking about the future is really scary, especially when — I don’t know how the rules are changing in the states, but especially here, it’s like we’re being run by children. It’s like “You can do what you want! Oh, no, those people died. Well, that’s a shit. Maybe we should stay inside again. Oh, no, that hasn’t worked.” No one knows what’s going on and to even try and get your head around what it’s going to be like in a week or year is impossible. And that makes you feel powerless, and then that makes

Lucy: Have you been having any of weird dreams during lockdown?

Fenne: The first couple of weeks I didn’t have any dreams. I think I was still in a state of shock, where I was like, This doesn’t feel normal. I almost [felt] like when you smoke too much weed, and your waking mind is going crazy, and then when you go to sleep, your body’s like, I literally can’t do it any more crazy anymore.

That was my brain for a while, but then come week three or four, I started having terrifying — like, not even apocalyptic dreams, just dreams when nothing was right. I had those, like. “running on the spot trying to get away from something but I couldn’t,” just really visceral, realistic horror dreams. I don’t know when they stopped, but it was dark for a bit. What about you?

Lucy: I think similarly in the beginning, I wasn’t having a lot of dreams. I did have this one dream about me and a lot of friends touring this big, kind of mansion-like house that was furnished. And they were like, “Oh, look, there’s a room over here, I found a new room!” And we were all just running around, like, laughing and loving this huge house. So I woke up and I was like, You know what, I’m just going to get on Zillow and see if there’s a big place that I could just fit my fantasy into. And there was this place that was listed, like, three days prior, and it looked so similar to the house of my dream. So I called my friends that were in the dream and I was like, “Hey, do you want to move in together? I just had this dream and I found this house and we were all in it together.” And that actually happened in July, like I live in the house with the people that were in the dream

Fenne: Oh, my god, that’s amazing.

Lucy: Did you feel you were psychic ever?

Fenne: Stupid stuff, like I predicted my brother’s birth. I was sitting with my mom on the stairs of old house, and I was, like, one and a half or two. I was like, “It’s going to be a brother, I think,” or something like that. And she was like, “What are you talking about?” And I put my hand on her tummy and said, “It’s going to be a brother, but it’s a sister I had in mind.” And she was like, “That was weird,” and then she went to get a pregnancy test and she was a month pregnant.

Lucy: Oh, wow. I thought you were saying like, “My mom was pregnant, so I predicted that she would have a baby.”

Fenne: No, like straight up, she had no idea.

Lucy: That’s much more impressive.

Fenne: She didn’t tell me for a long time — maybe until I was 15 I didn’t know, because she was like, “I don’t want to give her false power, I don’t want her to think that everything she has a feeling about is going to happen.”

But I think I go through certain areas where I get a bad feeling and try and squash it if I don’t know anything about it, and then it’s proven to me that I was right. I moved into this really spooky house… when I first moved to Bristol I was in shared houses, and then I was like, I really want a place to live with a couple of friends. We were looking somewhere and we, in the process, got kicked out of our existing houses, so we had to rush finding a place. We settled on this house that was enormous and really cheap, and we didn’t know why it was so cheap but we didn’t really think about it.

When we first went to view it, I was like, This feels wrong. Something about the energy of this house is not nice. It doesn’t feel like we’re welcome here. And I told my friend, and he was like, “Well, we don’t really have the chance to be picky right now, and we don’t have any money.” So we moved in, and then a couple of weeks after we moved in I was sitting outside — we signed on for a year, so we couldn’t get out even if we wanted to. I was sitting outside the house and the next door neighbor talking to me, and we were chatting and she was like, “Do you know the story behind the house you just moved into?” I was like, “No, but please tell me because I don’t like it.” And basically, about 10 years ago, maybe less, this family next door, who still lives next door, the dad in the family shot some guy because they were in warring gangs — I live in a really rough bit of Bristol. He shot this guy and tried to hide the body in the basement of the house that we live in now, and then he tried to escape to the States, and his wife bought him the ticket — they both went down for a long time, and the kids were in care. Now the woman’s out of jail and she’s living next door with the kids. So I was like, “There’s been a dead body in my house.” And I feel like I knew that something was wrong and I ignored it, and then ever since that point, I had to live there for another 11 months. And I had all my practice equipment in the basement, I’d made it into a room where we could record, and then it just didn’t feel good from that point on. I didn’t want to go downstairs.

Lucy: If you felt good, I’d be really concerned. [Laughs.] I do feel like people like haunted houses sometimes, like some people really get into that. I don’t understand it. I feel like you can only be into it if you haven’t truly been affected by the haunting of the house.

Fenne: It’s the kind of thing that you want to go into for a trip, but t you don’t want to really live there. I don’t know about you, and I will ask you, but I didn’t really think I was that much of a believer in ghosts for a pretty long time, and then I was listening to this podcast where people tell real stories from their lives — it’s not scripted at all, at least that’s what they say. There’s so many stories of people moving into a house, getting a weird feeling, and then their kid start talking to ghosts. Some of the stories are so visceral and so complicated and so obviously made me see that there is another world that I haven’t personally come into contact with, but why would we not? Have you had ghost experiences?

Lucy: Oh, yeah, more recently. I feel like I’ve heard from friends that the more you open yourself up to it, the more that it comes to you. I feel like I was just kind of closed off for a really long time. Even that podcast, I’d have been like, “Oh, good stories,” like whether that’s true or not, it doesn’t really matter. But having had your own experiences and having friends tell you stories — it’s really hard to refute someone you care about saying like, “This happened,” or something happening in your life. I’ve seen and heard things that I can’t explain, and I don’t know if it’s ghosts, but certainly something has happened that is completely unreasonable and inexplicable.

I do feel like they have sort of an architectural tone — you know, like haunting, need a place for it, and I do feel like there are some places that I’ve had, like, weird experiences that feel kind of supernatural. I think that once I realized, like, Oh, this is real, life is just kind of… The possibility has been there, so more of it has just come into my life. Not really as much right now — like the house we moved into should absolutely be haunted, but I don’t think that it is. There is sort of a weird energy — and anybody should laugh at me for talking about it this way, probably — but like, the energy is benevolent. If this is a haunted house, it’s a chill ghost.

Fenne: I think there’s no reason to not think that the energy of the previous people in a place affect it. Even if you don’t think a ghost is like an actual vision of a person, an exact replica of that exact person, I definitely think some places have bad vibes, some places have good vibes. But you can’t change the feeling in a place. When I moved into my current place, it was trash — the people that lived here before that burned the carpets up and left all their furniture here, and there were scrapes on the walls and stuff, and, like, everything was painted black. It was so weird. And again, I was poor and didn’t have much choice. So I moved in by myself and made it really nice with my best friend, and actually hung a picture of your face on the wall — that’s one of the first things I did, and I think that really helped.

But then I was broken into when I was on tour, and they stole all my merch money, which was a huge blow, and my laptop which had all my demos on it. So I went back to the house and the whole feeling had completely changed. And I worked very hard to not let this be a negative place for me, and I feel like that’s just been completely invaded and disrupted. And I obviously was scared as well, so I just got three of my best friends to live with me for a month, just to reset the feeling. And it worked.

I mean, you know as well as anyone that music isn’t particularly lucrative when you’re in the beginning stages of it, and a grand in cash will see you through two months. And that was not possible because… I don’t know, I hope that it was someone that needed it a lot, because I don’t like thinking it was just some guy that was like, “You know what, I’m pissed and I want stuff.” But I think as a person, I generally kind of revert to running away from stuff that is bad. So I think if I hadn’t really thought about it and wanted to stay in this place, I would have just moved.

Lucy: I don’t know if I told you, but I was robbed in May of this year, during quarantine. So, yeah, I’m really sorry that happened to you. I have a whole new, you know, knowing what it feels like. I was actually in the house, and I woke up at 5AM and heard — but I have such a creative mind, to put it lightly, where often I’ll hear things and be like, Oh, that’s the absolute worst thing that could possibly be. And I think like that all the time, so I know not to let it take hold over my thoughts.

So I woke up at 5 and was like, Oh, it sounds like people are in the kitchen opening the window, and well, they’re probably gone if they are, and probably they aren’t even there in the first place. I’m gonna go back to sleep. But then I went downstairs and someone had taken my wallet and a laptop and all of the booze in the house, and some other trinkets. Luckily nothing so bad — we had guitars around, and the guitars weren’t taken. One time I was robbed and someone stole my journals of three years, like all my journals of my whole college experience before I dropped out, and that’s the worst. That still hurts so much, not having those years documented.

But yeah, I did move. That dream I had about a new house, it was the old house that got broken into, and then we moved to this house. I feel a lot safer, but I definitely felt like, on top of feeling isolated and not leaving the house — like literally not even going onto the porch for a long time — I just dissociated for like a month and a half, basically June and the beginning of July.

I don’t know, I think a lot of people are going through things like that, and the general state of life is so fragile that when negative events come into life, it just feels kind of harder to recover. But I definitely I feel a lot better now. Do you feel any better in your house?

Fenne: I do, although it was a while ago. But yeah, just imagining that feeling — I wasn’t in. I was abroad, so I had to wait like a week to get back. But I can’t imagine knowing. You knew something was up, but you convinced your brain that it was just doing that thing that it does, and being in and being invaded in that way. That’s fucked.

It just hurt me so deeply that you had your journals stolen — that’s like taking a chunk of someone’s whole brain. And they don’t have any use for that stuff. Like the way that I was trying to frame the break in when it happened was like, OK, that’s cash, that’s a laptop. If they need them, those will provide for them in some way. But I was almost like, Why couldn’t they have left my memory stick with my demos on it? Because that wouldn’t benefit them. They took a packet of photographs, which was, like old family photos.

But there is so much bad, life ruining stuff happening at the moment anyway. And granted, it happens always, and I do think that the BLM protests in Bristol came right at the perfect point where everybody was angry about how we are being governed as a country, generally, through the corona stuff. And then the BLM stuff came at a time where everyone was so ready to be unhappy with the way that the world is run.

It was almost like, I’m aware that racism hasn’t just arrived overnight, and everyone was just like, “Oh, no, racism exists.” But it happened at a time when everyone was really open to the possibility that stuff is bad still, and we really need to make an effort as a community to change that.

I mean, this is completely unrelated to the health stuff, but there are so much bad, bad shit going on, and it’s a conscious decision to, daily, allow it to come in in a way that you can process in a positive way. It’s just so easy to doomscroll and be like, Fuck, this is really bad. You need to kind of police yourself as to when you let that stuff in, because it’s so easy to just constantly be tapped into this modern hellscape.

I recently got locked out of Instagram for no real reason, and initially I was like, Damn, that’s where I get all my stuff from. And then I was like, Actually, this is great for me because I can focus on the closest things to me and how to change the things that I can change. And not just think that the big picture is unattainable and so badly ruined that I don’t feel like I have the power to change anything.

Lucy: So maybe just to close, we can each tell a recent dream that we had.

Fenne: Weirdly, when you said that we should talk about dreams for our theme, I just typed in “dreams” in my notes on my phone, and I screenshotted a bunch of them, but two of them are so, so similar that it freaked me out, firstly, and then I realized that they’re exactly a year apart.

Lucy: Woah, that it so weird.

Fenne: The second one was when I was in Chicago recording, and the first one was a year before that.

So the first one, all I’ve written is, “Dream: Breastfeeding on a beach thinking, This would make a beautiful photo. Shiny sticker, little Game Boy, tiny nipples, holding hands while a wave rolls over.” And then the second bit is, “Nana is hosting a Halloween party. Me getting skateboard advice from a kind, kind man.”

I would like to pay the main attention to the breastfeeding part and the Halloween part, because exactly a year later in Chicago — I think around the time I was seeing a guy over there from Tinder, who was a skateboarder, so that’s kind of cool too. So the Chicago dream is, “Mum pregnant, me also pregnant. Letter writing to get better in school. Buying Halloween costumes with tall people and a beautiful woman on a minimum wage budget. Didn’t go for the white outfit.” And then the last line is,”Pour whiskey in my ear to unblock me, please.” [Laughs.]

Lucy: [Laughs.] Do you type these as soon as you wake up?

Fenne: Yeah, so they’re literally just key bits. I like to think I’m quite a stable person who’s got q handle on how they deal with their feelings, but it seems that there’s a lot of breastfeeding, pregnancy, weird kind of mom-daughter problem stuff that maybe I need to work through. And Halloween seems to be something I hold close to my heart, strangely.

What’s your most recent weird one?

Lucy: I almost never have any sort of, like, motherhood type of dreams. I mean, I’m also adopted and have pretty much no desire to ever be pregnant, so I guess I my subconscious just doesn’t complain. Like, Yes, that is true.

I’ve been having a lot of dreams set in Russia, which is a complicated setting because, as I said, I’m adopted, and my parents told me I was Russian when I was growing up. Actually when I turned 18, I got my file and found out that I’m genetically Uzbek, like from Uzbekistan, so not Russia. I took two years of Russian in high school to get connected to that part of myself, and then it’s like, I’m not even Russian.

So I’ve been having all these dreams set in Russia, and I had one a few days ago where the entire staff of Matador was swimming up an icy river and Rennie [Jaffe], who is both of our managers, and everyone that works at Matador was swimming up an icy river — freezing, and like chunks of ice floating by — because we were on our way to a show. We really wanted to see this girl sing.

Only four of us survived: Me, [Matador founder] Chris Lombardi, and Rian Fossett, and Malcolm Donaldson, who all work at Matador. We get to the shore and the promoters are there and they’re like, “Hey, we have blankets for you, thanks for making the trip, we know it’s such a hassle getting here. We have vodka and we have tea and blankets and heaters in this trailer, and we’re so happy you can make it.” And they have this little trailer set up next to this sports stadium where the show is going to be. They bring in the girl who they’re scouting, I guess to sign, and she’s so nervous. I’m trying to talk to her an be like, OK, it’s gonna be OK, you know, I was happy when Matador reached out to me, I think it’ll be fine, you seem really sweet.” We listened to her record, and the first song was the most beautiful song I’d ever heard. You know in a dream where you wake up and can’t remember what it was, but you know in the dream the supreme beauty was apparent to you? We all cried and were like, “We’re just honored to be here with you, you’re going to be a star,” everyone was so emotional. And then a couple of songs in, we were still liking it, but towards the end of the record, everyone got really bored and tired. So in, like, 20 minutes, it was just this beautiful, elated feeling to everyone sort of unspokenly getting really tired of her voice, the most beautiful voice in the world. And she noticed, and I noticed, and it was clear that everyone kind of just wanted to go. like when a party has gone on too long. She just started crying, and I just wanted to say, “I don’t know how to explain it, the feeling just left.”

And that was the dream, where I just had to console the best musician in the entire world that everyone just labeled not engaging enough.

Fenne: At the beginning of this dream, I thought the main part of it was — because this is way more detailed than I remember anything, like even real life — when you said that only only a few of you made it, I was like, Is this icy river a metaphor for the long road to being able to do shows again? And that a lot of people that we work with will just die after the market being ruined? But that’s so, so sad!

Lucy: I felt grief when I woke up. I have this problem where I wake up from dreams and I feel so deeply for everyone that I met in the dream. I thought about her the rest of the day, where I really felt bad for her even though she was a figment of my imagination. Like I had such sympathy for her position, and I really couldn’t understand and wanted to understand why we didn’t keep loving her music. I don’t know, it felt like something dark and sad going on there.

Fenne: Oof. I want to meet her. I want to climb in your brain and meet her.

Lucy: I could draw her. I wake up from dreams and I could tell you all of the architecture, I could tell you the fabric on the furniture and what makeup people are wearing, and shoes people are wearing. A lot of info.

Fenne: For a split second when I wake up, it’s like that, but yeah. There’s an artist called [Zdzisław] Beksiński — he trained as an architect and then he became a photographer, and then eventually he became this incredible painter, and his paintings inspired, like, black metal artwork. It’s like a lot of huge, imposing buildings draped in flesh, spiderwebs, and they’re beautiful because of how intricate they are, and they kind of glow. But he said that often he’d have the idea that — it’s not a theme, but it’s actually the picture itself, and then he replicated from this picture in his brain. So maybe you should go into Russian hellscape painting. [Laughs.]

(x)

[uhbasicallyjustmilex]

“A part of the idea of the title Romance was to kind of play it or nuance it off the grotesqueness of the sound in a lot of the record. The excess and the machinery. The industrial nature of it. I feel like the artwork really captures that because to me the heart looks very metallic and simulates feeling. Simulates emotion.” - Grian Chatten

Fontaines D.C. paint their album cover with DIFFUS

[kotori-mochi]

Can't afford art school?

After seeing post like this 👇

And this gem 👇

As well as countless of others from the AI generator community. Just talking about how "inaccessible art" is, I decided why not show how wrong these guys are while also helping anyone who actually wants to learn.

Here is the first one ART TEACHERS! There are plenty online and in places like youtube.

📺Here is my list:

Proko (Free, mostly teaches anatomy and how to draw people. But does have art talks and teaches the basics.)

Marc Brunet (Free but he does have other classes for a cheap price. Use to work for Blizzard and teaches you everything)

Aaron Rutten (free, tips about art, talks about art programs and the best products for digital art)

BoroCG (free, teaches a verity of art mediums from 3D modeling to digital painting. As well as some tips that can be used across styles)

Jesse J. Jones (free, talks about animating)

Jesus Conde (free, teaches digital painting and has classes in Spanish)

Mohammed Agbadi (free, he gives some advice in some videos and talks about art)

Ross Draws (free, he does have other classes for a good price. Mostly teaching character designs and simple backgrounds.)

SamDoesArts (free, gives good advice and critiques)

Drawfee Show (free, they do give some good advice and great inspiration)

The Art of Aaron Blaise ( useful tips for digital art and animation. Was an animator for Disney. Mostly nature art)

Bobby Chiu ( useful tips and interviews with artist who are in the industry or making a living as artist)

Sinix Design (has some tips on drawing people)

Winged canvas (art school for free on a verity of mediums)

Bob Ross (just a good time, learn how to paint, as well as how too relax when doing art. "there are no mistakes only happy accidents", this channel also provides tips from another artist)

Scott Christian Sava (Inspiration and provides tips and advice)

Pikat (art advice and critiques)

Drawbox (a suggested cheap online art school, made of a community of artist)

Skillshare (A cheap learning site that has art classes ranging from traditional to digital. As well as Animation and tutorials on art programs. All under one price, in the USA it's around $34 a month)

Human anatomy for artist (not a video or teacher but the site is full of awesome refs to practice and get better at anatomy)

Second part BOOKS, I have collected some books that have helped me and might help others.

📚Here is my list:

The "how to draw manga" series produced by Graphic-sha. These are for manga artist but they give great advice and information.

"Creating characters with personality" by Tom Bancroft. A great book that can help not just people who draw cartoons but also realistic ones. As it helps you with facial ques and how to make a character interesting.

"Albinus on anatomy" by Robert Beverly Hale and Terence Coyle. Great book to help someone learn basic anatomy.

"Artistic Anatomy" by Dr. Paul Richer and Robert Beverly Hale. A good book if you want to go further in-depth with anatomy.

"Directing the story" by Francis Glebas. A good book if you want to Story board or make comics.

"Animal Anatomy for Artists" by Eliot Goldfinger. A good book for if you want to draw animals or creatures.

"Constructive Anatomy: with almost 500 illustrations" by George B. Bridgman. A great book to help you block out shadows in your figures and see them in a more 3 diamantine way.

"Dynamic Anatomy: Revised and expand" by Burne Hogarth. A book that shows how to block out shapes and easily understand what you are looking out. When it comes to human subjects.

"An Atlas of animal anatomy for artist" by W. Ellenberger and H. Dittrich and H. Baum. This is another good one for people who want to draw animals or creatures.

Etherington Brothers, they make books and have a free blog with art tips.

📝As for Supplies, I recommend starting out cheap, buying Pencils and art paper at dollar tree or 5 below. If you want to go fancy Michaels is always a good place for traditional supplies. They also get in some good sales and discounts. For digital art, I recommend not starting with a screen art drawing tablet as they are usually more expensive.

For the Best art Tablet I recommend either Xp-pen, Bamboo or Huion. Some can range from about 40$ to the thousands.

💻As for art programs here is a list of Free to pay.

Clip Studio paint ( you can choose to pay once or sub and get updates. Galaxy, Windows, macOS, iPad, iPhone, Android, or Chromebook device. )

Procreate ( pay once for $9.99 usd, IPAD & IPHONE ONLY)

Blender (for 3D modules/sculpting, animation and more. Free)

PaintTool SAI (pay but has a 31 day free trail)

Krita (Free)

mypaint (free)

FireAlpaca (free)

Aseprite ($19.99 usd but has a free trail, for pixel art Windows & macOS)

Drawpile (free and for if you want to draw with others)

IbisPaint (free, phone app ONLY)

Medibang (free, IPAD, Android and PC)

NOTE: Some of these can work on almost any computer like Clip and Sai but others will require a bit stronger computer like Blender. Please check their sites for if your computer is compatible.

So do with this information as you will but as you can tell there are ways to learn how to become an artist, without breaking the bank. The only thing that might be stopping YOU from using any of these things, is YOU.

I have made time to learn to draw and many artist have too. Either in-between working two jobs or taking care of your family and a job or regular school and chores. YOU just have to take the time or use some time management, it really doesn't take long to practice for like an hour or less. YOU also don't have to do it every day, just once or three times a week is fine.

Hope this was helpful and have a great day.

"also apologies for any spelling or grammar errors, I have Dyslexia and it makes my brain go XP when it comes to speech or writing"

[bibliomoth]

I don’t blog about sports, but early this morning my favourite athlete Johnny ‘Hockey’ Gaudreau was knocked off his bicycle and killed along with his younger brother the night before their sister’s wedding. He had just turned 31 years old, married his next door neighbour and had a toddler daughter and a 6 month old son (who were planned to be flower girl and ring bearer at the wedding).

I adored Johnny because he was a such a small streak of lightning in a game full of huge dudes who were regularly a whole foot taller than him. His skills were just fucking phenomenal and he was so exciting to watch. I screamed with joy and cheered him on so loudly I lost my voice on many occasions. He represented his country for International Competitions and is the highest US point scorer.

I could get technical and talk about my favourite goals of his, his stickhandling, dangles, on ice spatial awareness etc but it is all on film for anyone to see, just too much to choose from. Nobody moved like Johnny Hockey.

As a person he was a sweet, kind guy who was universally liked in the sport and beyond. I do not follow celebrities on social media, but on hockey forums there are endless stories of his voracious love of mac and cheese (so much so Kraft put him in a TV ad) and skittles candies that he had a hockey stick covered in them and auctioned for charity.

In interviews he always talked hockey and his family. Whenever asked about new contracts and paycheques he would just shrug and say ‘yeah I bought my dad a boat so we can go fishing’ or ‘I just got a cool new wheelchair lift installed in my holiday home so my cousin can come and spend time with me’, or change the subject and talk about his dog, his wife and kids or The Birds. He was a real gem of a gentleman, modest and always ready to give credit to his team and dad (legendary NJ coach Guy Gaudreau) who motivated Johnny to skate as a toddler by placing skittles candies on the ice for him to fetch.

I’m am so sad for him, his family. This is just a blurb of feels about someone I counted down the days for until I could see them make magic on ice. I wish I could write a good tribute, dammit. Thank you Johnny Hockey.

[mirohlayo]

MOONSTRUCK | LN4

moonstruck (adjective)

unable to think or act normally, especially because of being in love.

( you just made lando loose all his senses )

warning : none, fluff

word count : 886

note : looks like an etablished relationship but no, just lando crushing on you lol. wrote something short for this one bc i think it suits much better. also kind of related with wonderwall post.

!! english not my first language !!

a great race.

it was such a perfect day. time seemed to stop for a while, like people had to enjoy every single minutes of this unreal moment. ends of races were often filled with happiness and a sense of pride always won over fans and racing teams. it was the amazing sport of formula one.

the drivers always celebrated their podium. with friends, race team, engineers, family and any others close people. it was an overload of joy mixed with lot of positive emotions, and these were such precious moments that must be cherished at all costs. but not everyone has this chance. this chance to say you did a great job, to say you drove well. when you feel like you're just not good enough. your being hurts you so much as if you were stabbed everywhere. no one wants to feel like that. and luckily, that wasn't the case for lando.

he did an amazing race. a fantastic job. as soon as he jumped out of his car, his race team congratulated him and praised him for his podium. p2, that's just incredible for the mclaren team. and of course, oscar was proud of his teammate. just like you. you were so proud of lando. you never stopped believing in him, you were always the one to cheer him up. that's why today he hugged you a bit longer than usual, his arms wrapped you tightly against his warm body. in that moment, everything seemed perfectly perfect. the rays of the sun dazzled only you two, in each other's arms, like a reunion of two souls who had been separated for far too long. it felt just like him and you against the whole world.

and with heavy hearts, the pilots had to separate from their favorite person to return to the one final task : post race interview. so as did lando. he gave you a soft smile filled with an amount load of love and let you out of his embrace. he took place in front of the interviewer, and kept his concentration for the race questions. the spot was that the mclaren team was still in front of him a few meters further, so he could still see the people he loved celebrate the efforts of both mclaren drivers. he saw lots of wide smiles, sparkles in all eyes. everyone was still cheering and lando's heart felt full of happiness and love.

his mouth was speaking words, answering bunch of questions about how was the race and stuff like that. a noisy background, filled with laughters and cries accompanied deep lando's voice as he was still talking to the interviewer. his eyes scanned everywhere, sort of a habit he have every times it was post race interview time. he looked from the mclaren engineers to his tired but proud teammate, from the fans of the paddock club to the others drivers. and then he saw you. your person.

his gaze immediately softened, as if he had found reassurance in you. his eyes laid on you so effortlessly because every time a weird but pleasant sensation seized him, as if he was hypnotized by a stunning thing. you were shyly laughing with his manager, charlotte. a crystal clear sound escaped from your mouth which turned into a beautiful smile. the way your eyes slowly squinted, shiny sparkles in them, your cheeks' lines came out and embellished even more your face. your perfect side profile that lando's couldn't help to look at. the sun rays colored your skin in an orange-pink shadow. now it seemed like the world stopped. he captured an unreal moment of you. wow. you just looked like a goddess. a pure gem he wanted to chase after and keep it for himself. and just with this glimpse of you, he started to loose all his senses.

now he was stuttering. he acted clumsy, saying dumb and incoherent things. he stammered on his words, let little "huhh" "hmm" out of his mouth while he was thinking about what he have to say. but he couldn't think because now all his attention was on you. nothing came into his mind but only this picture of you. he even started blushing and a shy smile took place on his lips. god why he was so fucking lost every times it comes to you ? it's just unfair how much effect you did to him. but soon the interviewer finally saw his awkward position and finished quickly the interview.

then he ran to join his team, especially you. you turned to face him, and without any hesitation you hugged him tightly. because it is never enough hugs. oh how his heart craved for your touch. your body pressed against him, your breath on his neck. he was for sure so in love with you. and whenever you would ask him why he acted so clumsy around you, he always had the same answer. "you just stress me that's all" he would shrugged. but actually, the most correct answer would be "i just don't know anymore how to act normal because of you, your person and your presence. because after all i think i'm just a bit too much in love with you".

yeah, it was the perfect answer. and that without any doubts.

[jmdbjk]

Mental gymnastics...

I am flipping out. That's all. Just my brain doing cartwheels and whatever those things are called where you flip between those high bars and let go for a breathless second and then grab onto reality again. Or this...

Too much Olympics these past few weeks I guess... anyway.

WARNING: POSSIBLE SPOILER ALERT! I may or may not mention scenes in detail and their outcomes during these long rambling messy posts beginning with the next sentence.

Before I get into it... kudos to the staff for keeping up with these two and for suffering many extremely anxious moments as Jimin and Jungkook drove themselves through NYC, as Jungkook and then both Jimin and Jungkook rode the motorcycle through traffic, and the few heart stopping moments when JK flipped his kayak over and then they took off down the river alone before staff caught up with them. Not to mention probably looking up the nearest ER/urgent care facility in case Jimin got too dehydrated from his bout with the stomach bug.

Seriously though, their lives and global headlines had to flash before their eyes when JK disappeared underwater under that kayak... so big applause for the staff/production crew for not shitting THEIR pants thirteen times too.

So here are some of my thoughts. I'll begin with the first episode...

Episode 1:

In the opening scene, I'm assuming this is Antoya Korean BBQ restaurant. They were talking about JK's sore throat and that he had to visit a medical facility. Jimin kept on about it. It seemed like JK's "stop babying me" attitude bubbled up a little bit. Let them be them. As you can see, JK adjusted Jimin's beanie so he could see his eyes. They were fine.

Pause and reflect: they didn't know what to expect with this idea of a travel show. The moment above happened on Thursday evening, July 13. Both of them were working. Jimin was still working on his concepts, photos, MV and whatnot, planning to finish everything for Muse in the coming months. Jungkook had a full schedule for promoting Seven which was dropping the next day. He had to get up early for Good Morning America concert in the park.

I'm stating all this for point of reference. Nothing is static. JK was in work mode: he had a performance the next day and also not feeling well himself. Jimin had been on a plane for 14 hours. Just keep these things in mind before jumping to conclusions.

In the next scene (the next day) back at the hotel after JK's done with his performance and when he's packing to go on this trip he's all in and ready to go. Hurry up Jimin!

Jimin asked him how the live performance went. As we know, the GMA live performance was mostly rained out. Before the storm came through, they quickly pre-recorded the performances before it would have been time for the live broadcast and then shut it down. Jungkook had to be driven quickly to the studio to be interviewed to fill the leftover time in the program that more of his live performance would have taken up.

Hearing Jungkook say "this isn't my first rodeo" was never going to be on any bingo card in my lifetime.

I don't know what he was scribbling on that iPad but it looked geometric. He was focused. Maybe it was something for the next week's performance, maybe it was a sketch for music show staging, trying to recreate that flower archway they saw at Antoya the night before? maybe he was doodling in Canva... we don't know.

Me either, Jimin... (this was the first of all the hilarious gems that begin to shower down on us).

They are both known to be perfectionists when it comes to their work. And we know they've also both performed when feeling less than 100% on that stage. Jungkook realized there were circumstances beyond his control and he took it in stride.

FYI, in New York City, they stayed at the Loews Regency on E. 61st Street in Manhattan. It is between Madison Ave. and Park Avenue and not far from Central Park. Swanky. The suite looks like the 2-bedroom "Park Avenue Suite" and runs $2100 a night... gasp. Yes, its the same suite where JK did his live after his rained upon GMA appearance. During this live he mentioned being poked with needles, IV's and shots in the butt as well as teasing us with what would become Are You Sure:

No, I don't think Jimin stayed in this suite with JK. Jimin's room had a smaller bathroom and a shower curtain instead of a glass shower door. Staff with camera woke him up.

To be that beautiful when rolling out of bed... anyway, I digress...

It truly was unplanned and spontaneous as if they were doing this with the idea of "let's try it and see if it can be viable." Even Jimin wasn't sure if any of this could be aired.

Once they got in the Jeep they started to find their groove. Being alone, just them, was what they needed. They could focus on what was ahead of them. The driving moments were some of the best for me.

We eventually learn that Jimin wasn't feeling well and I'm certain this is what Jungkook was telling Yoongi during that episode of Suchwita, along with the elbowing in the nose.

Seems like Jimin's stomach trouble started when they were at the first restaurant, the burger place. The bathroom visits continued at the brewery and into the evening at the campsite.

Jimin had some sort of stomach bug that kept him on the toilet a lot and he ran a little bit of a temp. I am sad that he wasn't feeling 100% when they were on the yacht the next day but he still seemed to enjoy it enough to find the humor in his situation. He was a real trooper.

It sure didn't stop him from eating. My man was very brave in that regard. Me... no way I'd be stuffing my face with a big greasy burger when at any moment I might need to make a run for the toilet.

They get back on the road and these are the moments that I wait for:

After arguing in satoori about who is the worst driver between them, they start shopping at Dick's.

And get recognized...

After shopping excursion at Dick's, they finally head to High Nine Brewery...

Jimin's first sample wasn't to his taste (again). His taste buds were probably a little off since he had the stomach thing going on... but JK's eyebrows say that his sample was pretty good.

They finally settle on a hard seltzer and a pale ale and relax for a little bit. Jungkook is still wondering what would make good subject matter to film. They are truly making it up as they go...

Jimin proceeds to explain and an interaction happens and I am not sure what to think about it:

I am going to end this post here because they are now on their way to the kayaks and that segment deserves its own post and I have too many screen shots of it to fit in this post.

[These are all my own opinions about what I am seeing and hearing them say and from what I am observing from the video. It's ok if your opinion is different from mine.]

[leveragehunters]

Feed is on sale! For 2.99!

Amazon link.

This is a bloody incredible series, and it hits even harder now that we've experienced a full blown pandemic. It's takes place in a world where we won a zombie apocalypse, but I describe it as: "It's about zombies the same way Animal Farm is about pigs."

Seanan McGuire AKA Mira Grant gives an overview of the series in this fantastic interview (from 2012):

The basic concept behind the Newsflesh trilogy is that in 2014 the Zombie Apocalypse happened, and it took us about three years, but around 2017, 2018, we actually managed to win. A lot of people died, a lot of land was permanently ceded, but we came out on top. So 20 years pass, and you have an entire generation of people that’s grown up in a world where zombies just are. They’re not something special. They’re not something exciting. They just are. And people go on, people do what they do.

It also includes gems like:

I would call [the CDC] back and say, “If I did this, this, this, this, this and this, could I raise the dead?” And every single time they would say, “No.” And I’d say, “OK,” hang up, and go back to working. After about the 17th time, I called and said, “If I did this, this, this, this, this, this and this, could I raise the dead?” And got, “Don’t … don’t do that.” And at that point, I knew I had a viable virus.

[grunklejam]

WOW!

Our interview with Jason Ritter was an incredible event. The man came to us, sat down in person, read the chat, spoke to people, and dressed in his full fucking Dipper outfit?! We had so many great questions, had a really informative chat and do you know what, it was incredible just how much of a Gravity Falls obsessive he really is. I've never met a man so passionate about the show.

We've got an edited VOD coming soon with captioned audio (we had a few audio skips) but before then, we do have an instant stream that Wynn, one of our amazing members, recorded for us.

Jason told us everything from his favourite quotes and episodes, to meeting fans at conventions, to the Cipher hunt, to his feelings on Dipcifica. He was so, so patient with our fans so direct with us, and gave us SO many revelations that you'll need to hear it yourself to find out more.

He left us with this gem:

Then gave us this beautiful parting message while just kinda hanging around chat for a while.

He was without a doubt the friendliest, most enthusiastic, humble and engaging man I've ever interviewed, and I was a music journalist for a decade. What an incredible experience.

I'm incredibly proud of us. To have a Hollywood actor come on LIVE to talk to us about a silly little show from ten years ago? Insane. Absolutely bonkers. Crackers, even.

The Gravity Falls fandom is still kicking, still amazing, and YOU made it all real.

Thank you to everyone who joined us, and I hope everyone will be listening when we get our edit together!

[if-whats-new]

What's New In IF? Issue 14 (2024)

By Erika, Marjorie, Axelle, and Noi

Now Available!

Itch.io. - Keep Reading below

Want to learn a neat fun fact? Check out the itch.io version ;)

~ EDITORIAL ~

Back on Track…

After a tumultuous early summer, where we had to restrict the amount of content included in the zine, we are officially back on track! ~ see the brand new editorial we have ~

From this week onward, you will see the return of Highlight on… : our section where we bring some hidden gems of games and sent titles you recommended. If you haven't filled our form yet, we really encourage you to do so!

We love to learn about games, especially what people liked about them, and share them along with all of you!

As we have somehow managed for the past three months (already!), we will continue to do our best to report on IF news, and hope help you all discover new IF sights along the way!

Thank you all for the kind messages, and all the support you have given us so far.

It really means a lot to us that you put your trust in this silly project!

ERIKA, MARJORIE, AXELLE, AND NOI

~ ANNOUNCEMENT ~

BECAUSE WE ARE MAKING SOME CHANGES…

If you follow us on here, you may have seen recent announcements about changes happening with the zine. For a while now, we have been wanting to include more original content, like short essays, longer-form reviews, and interviews (see the final page wink wink).

As such, we will be opening our email to anyone who would like to participate in this new endeavors. If you have a neat idea for a one-page essay, want to deep-dive into a game and review it, or have questions for IF person of note, contact us!

What's New in IF? is expanding! Be part of the movement! Submit!

~ ADDENDUM ~

BECAUSE WE MADE SOME ERRORS LAST WEEK

The game mentioned as Appt 102 is actually Apt 502. Apologies to @apt502-if

The player description for Heavy Is The Crown should have indicated royalty, not prince. Apologies to @heavyisthecrown-if

~ EVENT SPOTLIGHT : IFCOMP ~

The IF Superbowl

The Interactive Fiction Competition (or IFComp) is one of the major yearly IF events, since 1995. It may be even the longest still-recurring yearly game making event!

Started by Kevin Wilson in the IF Usenet Forum rec.arts.int-fiction, submitted games were limited to 2h playtime before being judged and ranked by players.

Throughout the years, the IFComp evolved, seeing a couple dozens of parser entries to a wide and diverse range of IF forms. Still, after ballooning during Covid, with recurring 70+ entries, the event continues to be a key avenue for IF creation.

Participating in the IFComp requires signing up ahead of time, by submitting an intent before July 31st. Completed games must be uploaded before August 28th.

Follows a month and a half voting period, where both players and authors can rate entries (a minimum of 5). If participants rank high enough, they are eligible for a piece of the Colossal Fund pie and prizes!

The IFComp committee is looking for prizes, both physical and digital, as well as donations to the CF!

~ ENDED ~

Almost 200 entries were submitted to the O2A2 Jam! If you are looking for some tiny Visual Novels, check them out!

Only a couple of visual novels were fixed and submitted for Fix the Worst Visual Novels (Jam). Come cheer on the hardworking fixers!

~ ONGOING (VOTING) ~

The 17 entries of the ParserComp are ready to be played and judged! Until the end of July, you can cast your votes!

~ ONGOING (SUBMITTING) ~

Only this weekend left to submit something to the Anti-Romance Jam!

Do you understand or write Ukrainian? Until the end of the year, the Ukrainian IF Festival is happening on itch.io! If Visual Novels are more your style, this jam ends in just a week!

Looking to check out a new IF program? The Decker Fantasy Camp is in full swing! A bit more than two weeks to mess around with the program and create something with Decker!

Did you submit an intent to the IntroComp? The deadline to submit your prototype is coming up! Don't forget, on July 31st!

For the francophones, the French IF community is organizing a summer-long camp to create parsers. Join the Confiture de Parser if you're interested!

Until the end of July, a chill IF (text-only) game jam is happening on itch, from the Interactive Fiction Club.

Ending in about a month, is the summer-long unranked SuNoFes Jam (Summer Novel Festival), where you can only submit one IF/VN game!

If it is mechanical restrictions you are looking for, then the Single Choice Jam might be for you. Until mid-August, you can only have one choice! @neointeractives

~ OTHER ~

Over on the IntFiction Forum, the Review-a-thon is continuing its initiative to get more reviews for games. Check out this post by Tabitha if you want to participate! This is also a sponsored event, aiming to raise funds for one of the Forum members.

The Interactive Fiction Showcase is still running! If you have completed an IF piece this year, consider submitting it! It is happening only on itch!

~ NEW RELEASE ~

Ocean Red (Twine) is a dark surreal game with a nautical setting and body horror. @paletteheart

Fluid Worlds (Custom) is an experimental piece about the nature of the world and humanity's need to change it.

Help! I Think I'm In Love With My Best Friend! (Twine) is a cozy little game about coming out and accepting yourself. @txt-frog

These Thieving Hearts (CScript) is the new Heart's Choice release. @heartschoicegames

La Noche del Ensayo (Inform) is a mystery text- adventure, where you must ensure a murder doesn't take place.

Biegnij/Run (TyranoBuilder) is a short visual novel about connections and relations.

time is but the drawing of a sword (Twine) is a small pixel-art illustrated visual novel about alienation and the passage of time.

marquis cut (Bitsy) is a short kinetic piece about trauma. @thesophiades

The Mother Deer (Twine) is short interactive fiction game based on traditional folk tales from Kyrgyzstan.

consumption (Twine) is a short game about contemplations before death.

SUNDOWN (Twine) is a tiny sci-fi adventure where you play as a star with a very important quest.

As always, don't forget to check out the submitted entries to the events mentioned in the previous pages. They deserve some love too!

~ NEW RELEASE (WIP) ~

Crystals of Aequarin (Twine) is a modern fantasy project set around a murder mystery. @crystalsofaequarin

Lies & Legalities (CScript) is a legal fiction project, where you incarnate a lawyer who can always tell who is lying.

Blue Shades (CScript) is a superhero-focused project, in which you play an ex-super tuned rogue and looking for revenge.

Operation: Wrath (CScript) is a sci-fi alternative universe project, where you lead an intelligence team investigating misuse of powers.

CyberHaven (CScript) is a cyberpunk-inspired project where you embody a detective.

The King’s Veins (CScript) is low fantasy project set in post-apocalyptic medieval era.

~ GAMES UPDATES ~

Confluence (Ren’Py) is now available in both English and Japanese. @forsythiaproductions

Such Happy Campers (CScript) added Chapter 5 to the demo and fixes. @girlfromthecrypt

Shattered Eagles (CScript) updated the demo by adding Chapter 4. @shattered-eagle

Ripples of Blood (CScript) includes extra content in the demo. @livdboba

Crown of Exile (Twine) added part of Chapter 10 to the Patreon demo. @ramonag-if

One Knight Stand (CScript) updated the Patreon demo to include Chapter 2-3. The demo is also now available on itch.io. @oneknightstand-if

The Harbinger (Twine) completed its move to Twine, with the Episode 2 update. @ourlittleaphrodite

Dawn of Heroes (CScript)'s demo now includes Chapter 25.

Echoes of the Kingdom (CScript) added some extra scenes to the demo.

The Game of War (CScript) has updated the demo with extra content.

Dance of the Night (CScript) added 10k more words to the demo.

~ OTHER ~

For Twine authors, another update is on its way, as SugarCube has upgraded to 2.37! For more info, check out this post!

Released every two weeks, the Amare Fortnightly Bulletin is once again available! Check it out here! @amaregames

The author of Ordinor Ultor (Twine) was recently interviewed about their game. @ordinorultor-if

Over on the IntFiction Forum, user mathbrush completed the History of the IFComp, where he looks back on past winners, influential games and authors, and continued his exploration of XYZZY winners: Superluminal Vagrant Twin, The Wizard Sniffer, and Bogeyman.

~

As always, we apologize in advance for missing any update or release from the past week. We are only volunteers using their limited free time to find as much as we can - but sometimes things pass through the cracks.

If you think something should have been included in this week's zine but did not appear, please shoot us a message! We'll do our best to add it next week! And if you know oncoming news, add it here!

~ HIGHLIGHT ON... ~

A couple of games that we thought were cool. an IF Comp highlight lol (we swear it wasn't planned!)

Turandot by Victor Gijsbers (CScript - IFDB)

An erotic parodic retelling of Puccini's opera with twists and turns, made possible thanks to excellent writing. Though a bit crass a times, it is very fun to play. One of the best non-commercial CScript game out there! recommended by Marjorie [Team]

Emily is Away by Kyle Seeley (Unity - itch.io - VNDB - IFDB)

Withdrawn from the IFComp in 2015, the game is a classic in communication sims, nostalgic of now-unused AIM chats. Spanning 5 years in college, you get to choose how your relationship with Emily evolves. recommended by Erika [Team]

According to Cain by Jim Nelson (TADS2 - itch.io - IFDB)

The critically acclaimed IF Comp entry of 2022, about the tale of Abel an Cain, and the first ever murder that changed everything. It has great puzzles and impeccable writing. An instant parser classic! Read the interview - Walkthrough

recommended by Axelle [Team]

Your favourite game here?

Do you have a favourite game that deserve some highlighting? A old or recent game that wowed you so much you spam it to everyone? Tell us about it! And it might appear here!

~ FROM OUR READERS ~

WE LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU ALL! WETHER IT'S GOOD OR BAD, OR EVERYTHING IN BETWEEN…

Hi What's New IF Team! Thank you so much for all your hard work with the zine! Thanks to all your efforts, I've been able to put in my favorites so many cool projects! You're doing such a good job! - Kyle

Um… I just wanted to congratulate Axelle on their exams, and thank them for introducing me to parser games. It's like a whole new world of fun and puzzle opened up! - anonymous

I am so so glad you guys are still doing the zine and keeping it all up no matter what! I've been reading What's New in IF religiously every single week since you guys launched and I couldn't imagine not spending a Saturday without it! - clawiffromme

Excited to see the zine's new direction! This project has in my eyes, a huge potential, and I'm really looking forward to see what you do with it… - InteractiveIntens

Can I just give a shout out to the author of Apt 502? Because that update had me ON MY KNEES! So obsessed with this WIP! (also thanks team for introducing me to it!) - anonymous

It's impressive you're still here. I didn't expect the zine to be going on for this long considering what it must take to make it every week. - anonymous

THANK YOU ALL!

Have something to say? Send us an ask on Tumblr entitled: Zine Letter!

~ FINAL THANKS ~

Before we end this issue, we would like to thank:

@chinchinashi, clawiffromme, InteractiveIntens, Kyle, nexthypertext, and a bunch of you anonymous helpers!

Sent news, helpful tips, cool links, filled form, written Sheet line, even emails… all these help us so much to make this Zine possible!

To the wonderful users who sent us cool recommendations, thank you! We will do our best to include them in the next issues!

And as always, huge thanks to all you readers to liked, shared, and commented on last week's issue! What might be tiny actions are huge support and motivators to us! Thank you for cheering us on this journey!

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

As final parting words, we would like to hint at a major addition a future issue:

IF enthusiast, software builder, and game creator Joey Tanden will be answering all your questions!

Want to know more about their work? How they came into IF? Or their game dev experiences? Send us all your burning questions!

And see you again next week!

ERIKA, MARJORIE, AXELLE, AND NOI

WHAT'S NEW IN IF? 2024-ISSUE 14

[fairycosmos]

ok unsolicited advice but a few things about job searching, if you have not already done so (ignore if this is outta line or you don't feel up to any of it) : 1. get on LinkedIn, add yourself to job searching/posting groups, periodically search for the job title you want in the locations you want (also select hybrid/remote) LinkedIn also has alerts for this. Try adding/ following people too, sometimes the employers do not like if an account looks "unfinished" 2. add those weird words (search online which ones help for the jobs/sectors you want) to your CV/resume even if you cant add them to the text, add them in white on Word or whatever program then save as PDF - this is to get past AI screening. but I did hear that if the CVs are printed and humans are manually screening them, they usually put half in trash immediately. It is literally pure fucking luck, horrifying and annoying but what can any of us do? 3. never forget this is a numbers game & requires a shitton of luck and the rejections received do not mean jackshit (unless they are providing you with constructive feedback on your CV, emails, interviews etc. most places never bother but mentioning just in case) like for a godawful example, both I and one of my friends (and we have master's degrees in our field, like we applied for adverts we had full qualifications for, was not enough) had to search for more than a year and sent literally hundreds of applications. we got a handful of interviews. I had like 4. she had like 6. the job market is fucking horrible, try your best to stay motivated and keep applying. it will come with time. But do take breaks, the mental load can get gross. Good luck Chloe, hope you find something that is decent at the very least.

thank you sm from the bottom of my heart this is insanely helpful!! 🧡 going to give it a tag so i can revisit it over and over - it's such a shitshow out here and worrying about how you're going to pay your pills and stuff can make you so fucking ill so any advice is deeply appreciated. you're a gem and i hope you know how much it means to me to talk to people who understand and who can boost my morale a bit lol bc it is truly flagging these past few weeks. sending a massive hug your way x

[gentlebeardsbarngrill]

04/03/2024 Daily OFMD Recap

TLDR; Rhys; Nathan; Rachel; David; Samba/BTS; Vote for OFMD on GLAAD; Watch Parties; Watch Party Polls; Pirate Experts; Uncle Ed; Fan Spotlight; Love Notes; Daily Darby/Tonight's Taika

= Rhys Darby =

Looks like Rhys is taking a page from Taika's book and doing some advertising this week!

Src: Rhys' IG, Rosie's IG

= Nathan Foad =

Love's Labor Lost

Nathan will be playing Costard in Love's Labor Lost! ROYAL SHAKESPEARE THEATRE STRATFORD-UPON-AVON11 APR - 18 MAY 2024 More info!

= Rachel House =

Rachel's new movie The Mountain has been selected for the Sydney Film Festival 2024!

Src: Rachel's IG

= David Jenkins =

Chaos Dad saying what we're all thinking.

Src: David Jenkins' IG

= Samba Schutte =

More BTS from Samba! This time improvising from the Revenge crews!

Tumblr Link to the Vid / Src: Samba's IG

== Vote for OFMD on GLADD! ==

Hey crew! GLAAD is opening up Fan Favorites for their May 11th ceremony! Let's see if we can't get OFMD one of those awards! Requires an email, and it's not in the inital dropdown, you'll need to add Other.

Please Vote! Img Src: Irene Adler's IG

== Active Watch Parties ==

Taskmaster NZ Series 1 Watch Party with @saveofmdcrewmates! When: April 3-12 (W,F, Su -2 eps each) Time: 11 am PT/ 2pm ET/ 7pm BST Where to watch: YouTube, TVNZ, Channel 4

Twitter Hashtags:

#Quartermaster

#OurFlagMeansDeath

#Taskmaster

== Poll Going on for Watch Parties ==

Twitter Poll going on by @iamadequate1 regarding two questions:

Should WP start times be the same for Europe and the US?

Is it useful for each WP to have its own separate hashtag?

Please vote when you get a chance if you use twitter. Full Thread

== Pirate Experts ==

== Uncle Ed ==

Some of you may have been seeing the theme of "uncle edward" going around and if you're wondering what it is-- well look no further! @eddiepeaches had a really great post (which is where it originated), please check it out!

== Fan Spotlight ==

= Cast Cards =

Tonight's Cast Card is Abshir! Good to see Devon Stewart getting some love! Thank you @melvisik!

= Big Gay Energy Podcast =

This weeks episode features an interview with Vico Ortiz!

Where to Watch: Big Gay Energy Youtube

Where to Listen: BGEPod

Big Gay Podcast Patreon!

== Love Notes ==

Evening/Morning m'dears. Hopefully today was a bit easier! We got quite a few crumbs of bts / script info today and lots and lots of Rhys which certainly raised some people's spirits.

I just wanted to send a reminder out today that lovelies, you are so much more than what others think of you. You are so much more than what you think of yourself even most days. You are such an inspiration, and you've been doing a really amazing job, even if you've had bad days. I'm sure you're tired of hearing that, but that's too bad because I'm gonna keep saying it until you get it in your beautiful brain that you are doing great. So many things are going on, and everyday, bad or good, you are getting through them. If someone was unkind to you today, I'm so sorry, and I hope they haven't made you feel too down on yourself. If they did, just know, you are a force to be reckoned with. They can be spiteful and hateful, but you are a wonderful force that keeps on kicking ass.

You deserve kindness in this world, no matter what, you hear me?

No matter what.

You're doing great, so give yourself a big ol hug for me and the rest of the crew, and know you are an absolute gem. <3 You're gonna get there, wherever you're trying to go. Keep going!

Love Notes Image Src: @ BethEvans IG.

== Daily Darby / Tonight's Taika ==

Don't ask me what theme this is 👀

Taika Gif Courtesy of @darkinerry Darby Gif Courtesy of @wastingyourgum

[sleepynegress]

So, I'm Watching Dollar Tree The Gilded Age: The Buccaneers (I apologize that this is a long one folks because of ADHD Romantic Period Drama w/ ~Color~ tangents)...

Okay... So, I have to preface this by admitting that Bridgerton never has been my great big thing. It's a cake sculpted from cotton candy.

Pretty and sweet, but not much substance. And very much leaning on the "fantasy" so everyone can enjoy the costume romance fun (but it does please me to see my marginalized players, playing well...). -Using an author's works as a base, who not only started with an all-white palette but was flippant and insulting in response to the idea of inclusion... And yet...

I'm just saying, it is something that the woman who walked away from ABC because an exec didn't respect her enough to get a Disney pass for her family, went on to make that lucrative author's uplift deal with, instead of say, Beverly Jenkins. I love underdog romances that aren't the typical het white bread. Give me the canon gays (I never got slash...but I love when it's canon, especially with color), the big girls, the dark brown skin girls, the Black couples, and the interracials, especially when both are BIPOC and there's no lag in charm/looks in the lighter half in some expertly lit, dressed, confection that makes everyone look as gorgeous as they actually are and there's all kinds of soft plotting and chemistry. Bridgerton for all its lazy ways of handling color, gave that. Everybody is hot. And the people that studios have typically just pretended either weren't "invented" yet or were all living horrible tortured lives of enslavement got to get the sweet costumed wooing, will-they-won't-they, ~romance~ treatment. But... being an obscure Black history nerd... I'm neurodivergent, so I have some deep-dive GEMS that I'll mention here that I NEED TO SEE DONE WELL, before I die. FYI I called Dido Elizabeth Belle a good 8 years before that was actually made. It is frustrating to see some of the ACTUAL interesting capacities in which some actual existing Black folks in history who did live interesting, not tragic lives, not given the big glossy budget, well-written renderings they deserve... In lieu of what has now, firmly taken hold as a trend, colorblind casting in known white works. See recent adaptations of David Copperfield, Persuasion, Tom Jones, & Great Expectations,

and now, this The Buccaneers (which like I said, is Dollar Tree, and *worse* the colorblind cast sister Conchita is using her regular-eggular Cali accent and...is not a compelling actress & her man is a jar of mayo) and baby...them costumes are Reign-levels of anachronistic/bad. It's the lazy jump onto the trend Shonda exploded, and Mr. Malcolm's List started (yeah, that short film was put on YouTube a full year before Bridgerton debuted). So, my point... Instead of *just* doing colorblind casting in old classic white period works... I need to see these ACTUAL GREAT stories of and/or written by or about the colorful people who lived in those societies. And this is where it could get long... but I'll do my best to keep it short... EXAMPLES that were gotten right and those *I need to see adapted*: ____

Interview With The Vampire is inclusive color-AWARE casting... The showrunner went beyond and actually rewrote the narrative to make sure the inclusion wasn't lazily done, but actually improved the depth of the source IMO. And I believe the showrunner is a queer white man. It just takes empathy and effort.

Passing... is a moody slow-burn horror based upon an actual work written by a Black woman in that period, and adapted by a white-passing WOC who not only lived the theme, but rendered it expertly.

Belle is often pointed to as a good example, but my nerd-ass knows Gugu's beyond AMAZING handling of the material elevated it.

Too much was changed from the reality of her life (IMO), still...Most period dramas are about as "true" and yall know I was not a fan of Sam Reid's over-dramatic ass in this... (yelling in that damn carriage for what?!) but he is PERFECT in IWTV. Sanditon being made, despite the typical side-character Black character issues...really was a reset because Miss Austen had already envisioned, in her day and above her class(!) a Black heiress as a character getting the Austen treatment, w/o any modifications the salty and ignorant would prefer to think is beyond "true history". ----- I have a little hopeful part in my brain that wishes it had the power to will capable adaptions of the lives of Carlotta Stewart Lai - middle-class educated Black woman who became a teacher & lived an "Anne of Green Gables" type of Edwardian life (more interesting really) surfing, having "bathing parties," and teaching Hawaiians with her Black family, Portuguese, Hawaiian and Chinese friends on the big island... Her life was w/o the stereotypes people assume all Black Americans lived in Victorian/Edwardian "America".

Gustav Badin, a Black man who was "Chessmaster" of the Swedish Royal Court in the 1700's...was in charge of the Royal family's secrets after the Queen's passing, really gives me intelligent queer Black man energy in his portrait and lived out a non-tragic life in a VERY white space many don't know we occupied.

And The Hunters... Who already have a short film and I've posted about it here... but I would LOVE to see an actual rendering of their lives in the Klondike, with their gold and silver prospects and son grandson Buster and daughter Teslin in Edwardian Canada.

(that is Teslin at the highest point in the photo, named after the lake she was born at)

(and the Hunters' grandson Buster ice-fishing)

All this to say... Now, that I've thoroughly veered away from my review of a middling show... I WISH THESE DAMN SHOWRUNNERS used a little effort in research and imagination and gave us more "true to life" renderings of Black life (and life of color, in these romanticized spaces) that isn't tragic nor the patronizin inclusive "fantasy"... That feels like it's smirking at me while saying "we know you weren't ~really~ here, but here! have a cookie!!" These people existed.

You don't have to *just* make inclusive versions of white works with the lie that you have to do that because thee above people ~didn't exist~. Nor do you have to be lazy when you do!! (see: IWTV) Right now, for me... It feels like for the most part we're in a period of very shallow "advancement" in period rep. And I'm saying if little old me can find the actual stories that could make AMAZING true history-based media. Why can't the more powerful people do the same?? P.S.

You already know I'm fresh off being mad about that shitty Bass Reeves show...but I'm even madder because I can't even say, "just make sure its made by Black people," because Jeymes Samuel (AKA Bullitts) gave us skinny biracial StageCoach Mary!!!

---NO!! I will never stop being mad about it!!

DO BETTER!! Have the empathy and care for the material, regardless, and don't rest on "I know what I'm doing because I'm Black" That male gaze won out over truth in The Harder They Fall *smh*

P.P.S I get the feeling the lazy adaptions are about cash-grabbing, what they see as a trend, and being all the ready to jump back into the whitewashed business as usual, that ain't true to *all* actual histories nor (as Austen proved) fictions of those eras or spaces.

P.P.P.S. On The Glided Age!! I do love that the Fellowes drama has Erica Armstrong Dunbar (known for her book and research on Ona Judge -another figure whose story needs to be adapted!!!- the Black woman who successfully escaped enslavement from George Washington's household and was doggedly pursued by him throughout her life) and Salli Richardson-Whitfield as producers... so, Denee Benton's Peggy is authentic... but as much as I like The Gilded Age, I want to combine Fellowes comfort drama... with a CENTRALIZED Black character... Why can't someone do all of it correctly?? WHY??!!!

[pbandjelly535]

Hi, Welcome! My page name was inspired by this gem of an interview. Full clip is down below if you haven’t seen it! It’s super funny, a must watch if I don’t say so myself .🤪🫶

I post about women’s sports but I do have a bias towards the ultimate rizzler Paige Bueckers and her partner in crime Azzi Fudd.🤦‍♀️🤣 I do use some profanity bc blondie pisses me off 🙄 18+!

I delete asks after awhile to clear up da feed so feel free to ask something crazy. I give my honest unbiased takes and thoughts. Not afraid to be messy! I support CC if you are a hater thank you next. 🥰

I’m also on Tik Tok under the same username🫵

PAIGE BUECKERS YOU ARE A DALLAS WING! 💚💙(Manifesting/delusional)

[ten-shi-fandoms]

Their love language + a bit of them as a partner:

Blue Lock addition pt 2

_______________________

CW: Characters are of age, Ryusei Shidou being himself, Slightly suggestive (Both Ryusei and Sae), fluff/angst headcanons, pet names, mentions of violence (Ryusei)

Characters: Sae Itoshi, Shidou Ryusei

______________________________________

Sae Itoshi ⚽😮‍💨:

Fluff:

I feel like Sae's love language would be gift giving more than anything else.

Since Sae is a famous football(soccer) player he's not usually home to spend time with you so instead he'll send you gifts to make up for his absence.

It will usually be souvenirs from the places he's went to trinkets that remind him of you.

He loves giving you gifts that compliment you as well.

Things like a certain types of clothing that looks amazing on your body shape, accessories that compliment your eyes or even new products for you to use like hair care or skin care he knows you like.

He wants you to feel comfortable and happy in your own skin so giving you gifts that compliment you are some of his favorites to give.

Sometimes he'll send you some scandalous stuff to though-

Things like handcuffs, ribbons and even lingerie sets regardless of your gender.

And he always will send notes with these scandalous gifts.

Usually these notes talk about how he wants to see you in the things he sent and how he can't wait to send you more stuff to use in the bedroom.

When Sae is home he still showers you with gifts but instead of him sending you stuff he likes or thinks you like, he'll take you out to pick what you want and will base his gift off of that.

If you stare at something to long expect it to be your next gift when you see a box from Sae.

Sometimes his gifts are elaborate.

Things like long trips to places you wanted to go see, large amounts of expensive clothing he got for you, and much, much more.

Sae will buy you outfits out of fine silks, and gorgeous fabrics just for him to "accidentally" mess them up when you two are alone.

Even his smaller gifts are expensive.

It ranges from diamond rings and bracelets to gem encrusted chokers and anklets.

He just loves gifting you stuff.

Angst:

Sae is usually a cool headed person but when does get upset similar to his younger brother he'll usually stay away from you.

He can control his temper but he gets even more blunt when he's upset and he doesn't feel like making you feel bad so he'll keep his distance.

However unlike his younger brother, Sae will ask you to stay nearby for him.

Its always a quiet gesture but he really doesn't want to deal with other people and will actively use you as a excuse to get out of situations when he's upset-

Like dude will full out lie and say that your being clingy and want to leave to have alone time with him-

Anyways- he still gives you gifts when he's upset.

But during this time he wants a gift back to even though he won't say it.

His gift is you.

He wants you and your undivided attention on him no matter the situations.

He could be in a interview with you sitting behind the camera and he'll be staring at you making sure your focused on him until it's over so he can drag you back to his place from a "private conversation".

He'll take his frustrations out on you, which ends up in you not being able to walk the next morning-

But if he's not in the mood he'll hold you.

His arms around your torso, his head laying on your chest as he feels your chest rise and fall. It calms him down and gets him in a better mood.

When your upset he'll shower you in even more gifts.

Of course he'll be by your side and won't leave unless you say so, but he wants you to know he's there so he'll get you little things.

Things like your favorite snacks, the one show you wanted to watch that needed to be bought, new blankets, new stuff animals like he buys it all.

If you don't want him to to shower you in gifts he'll just stay by your side.

He'll put your head in his lap as he plays with your hair while you complain about your day, take you out to eat as you rant about work/school, he'll even cancel his flights and put his phone on do not disturb just so he can hold you when you cry.

He isn't going to speak when your upset, he stays mostly silent unless its something small like asking what you want to eat or if you want to go for a walk.

He'll be there until you fall asleep.

The next morning expect him to be gone, usually it's because of work but he would have a small gift on your table and a note just for you. (expext more gifts to randomly show up at your house thoughout the day-)

Ryusei Shidou ⚽😈:

Fluff:

This germlin's love language is physical touch.

And no it's not cute or lovey at all.

Like this man full blown bites you whenever he gets the chance-

You are covered in bite like scars because of his sharp ass teeth-

People sometimes think you guys are in a abusive relationship because of how many bites you have on your body.

So many you can't even hide them-

Not to mention he is super handsy.

Hands on your thighs, hands on your chest, back of your neck, your ass like dude can't keep his hands to himself.

He does love you though-

He shows a rare kinder (not really-) side of himself when you cuddle.

He will have his hands under your shirt as you lay your head on his chest, your legs wrapped around his waist is his favorite position, and surprisingly he'll stay there and pretty quiet to.

Any type of touching he's doing it and you have no choice but to comply.

You can be out in public and man's will straight of grab your chest before acting like he did nothing with a bit ass grin on his face.

When he's being less handsy he'll just keep a arm around your waist, or make you sit in his lap with his hand on your hips.

He may not act like it (he does) but he loves marking up your skin just to show it off.

Like he'll bite your neck, ear, collarbone, inner thighs, and make you wear outfits that show them off.

Low cut tops, loose or very short shorts, hair clips to keep your hair away from the marks to make them visible to anyone who looks at you.

He had no shame- and he expects you not to as well-

He has moments when he touches you softer to though.

He'll hold your hand pretty soft, and sometime if he isn't kissing you breathless he's caressing your cheek or the back of your neck as you kiss. He'll usually do this to tease you making you want more only for him to leave you dry-

Will tease you until he himself is also a mess, and he'll praise you for getting him so railed up.

Then he wants you to help his little "problem"-

Angst:

When Shidou is upset just try to be patient and stay away from him.

You won't see it when he's upset but you'll hear it.

Fron the cries of people he's hit, to the sound of him kicking someone, all the way to the sound of bones cracking under his hands.

If you keep your distance make sure to let him know your not afraid of him, even if you are.

He doesn't want to scare you off (if you got into a relationship with this goblin then you got guts), but he also doesn't want your disapproval.

When you do see him reassure him your there, just be careful.

Don't pity him or try to make him calm down just tell hin your there and that you won't leave.

Gently rub your hands up his back as he washes blood off his hands, wipe the blood off his face, help him wash his hair in the shower to calm hin down.

Little things like that slowly calm him down, if that doesn't work do something extravagant.

Make it entertaining, make it loud over the top.

Things like loud fireworks, taking him skydiving, watching scary movies, paint ball anything thats exciting that will quickly get him out of whatever mood he was in.

When your upset however you'll get a mixed bag.

What I mean is some days you'll have a decent boyfriend who tries (not really) to make you feel better and other days you'll get a asshole who teases you until you snap.

On the days where he's being decent he'll just let you touch him the whole day.

You want cuddles? Sure, just force your way into his arms. You want a kiss? Okay, make him bend down and kiss you. Want him to hold you? Alright just expect not to being able to leave the bed for a few days-

He doesn't know how to help you when your upset so he lets you do whatever you want.

Take his clothes, take his snacks, roll up in his blanket, he'll just get you back when your in a better mood.

When he wants to be a asshole though expect alot of yelling on your end.

He'll taunt and tease you the whole day just for you to continuously snap at him.

However this move is strategic.

He knows your stressed and in a foul mood and also knows letting it out will usually make it better, so he'll just ramp up his normal antics to piss you off to the point your red in the face from how much you yelled.

After you finished yelling, or crying, or maybe even both he'll run you both a shower.

It's a small gesture but it's something he only does for you.

He'll still tease you as he washes your body, his hands ending up in places they shouldn't be but it's all in good nature.

After showering (a few more times than you would've hoped-) he'll make food.

Usually the food is for himself and your only getting some because he made extra but he'll sit next to you while you both eat, most times while watching movies as he shit talks the main characters for almost anything.

Though when your tired, he'll cuddle you.

Not his usual cuddling but he'll spoon you and if you don't want that he'll hold you.

This often happens in silence since neither of you wish to speak.

Once you fall asleep he'll watch over you for a while before he lets himself go to sleep.

When you awake tho he'll somehow be holding your legs, his face buried in your stomach-

That is if you don't wake up with him between your leg-

[landinrris]

oh that was me with the lando & martin timeline anon. the full timeline may make your brain melt more. this is the stuff we know about for sure:

met late summer 2022 at one of martin's gigs in Ibiza - lando was there on vacation with max f, ollie etc. the video going around of them at fisher's gig was a couple of days after martin's.

sept 2022 monza gp - martin was at the race even though he wasn't playing and was with mclaren - they posted pics of him and daniel in their hospitality. after the race, lando posted pics of them him & martin leaving in a heli - he called martin his uber driver 🤣. lando stayed in amsterdam for a few days. both of them posted videos of them on martin's boat on the canals with martin's friend jurrian. local gossip sites mentioned they'd been seen in restaurants with friends. in this time martin bought lando his decks. lando posted pics of himself with them on the plane back to the uk and martin said in an interview a few months later that he had bought them as a gift for lando.

oct 2022 - hang out after the mexico gp - there are clips on tiktok of them at a club.

dec 2022 dubai - martin was playing there on 30th dec, turned up a few days early and hung out with lando. martin posted pics of them on his insta with some masks & there was a video of them playing padel with martin k and someone else. lando's friends all posted from the vip section at martin's gig.

jan 2023 - following martin's gig in thailand, he and louis met up with lando & martin k and they all flew to finland for several days - lots of pics and videos - then on to ibiza for a few more days - martin has a home there and his parents & sister spend a lot of time there and were with them - martin posted a pic of himself with his family and also there were videos of lando and both martins on a hike. martin then flew to nice the same day lando went back to monaco - he posted a pic of himself the next day in nice getting a haircut.

may 2023 miami gp - martin was playing at the miami race. that's where the nipple pinch pics come from & also this gem https://www.tumblr.com/alexi-01/716928290612559872/stop-this-is-so-cute-look-at-martijns-face?source=share

june 2023 - arrive early together in nyc and hang out ahead of lando's press stuff. martin's parents and sister were also with them - there's a pic of them with lando & martin in a japanese tea house. lando stays through to martin's gig and arrives late for thursday media day in canada. martin shows up to play after the gp in canada. he and lando were out together that evening in montreal - a dj in the bar they were in took pics with them both. next day lando posts a pic of video of him, martin & louis on a hotel balcony.

july 2023 - max v & lando go to tomorrowland after the spa gp. max is in vip with his family, lando is up on stage with martin trying but failing to hide behind some speakers. videos of them at the afterpary. lando then goes to amsterdam for a couple of days before he has to be back in spa - posted a pic of the view from martin's place & a pic leaked of them playing pool.

august 2023 - after being on vacation with his family lando goes to ibiza. missed all his friends who had been there all summer, stays with martin's childhood friends incl jurrian from the amsterdam boat. pics of them out celebrating ward and jurrian's bdays and the afterparty of martin's show. lando then flies with martin to his shows in bratislava and then marseille - was pictured in bratislava plus martin posted a story with him in and lando let the marseille detail out in a ziggo interview at the amsterdam gp.

sept 2023 - zandvoort gp martin hanging with lando's dad on the grid. after the race there's a video of the two of them getting out of a van at amsterdam airport and boarding max v's plane which flew to monaco.

oct 2023 - hung out after the mexico gp after lando had had dinner with carlos. i follow a friend of lando & max v's who lives in mexico city who now has a locked account so the pics aren't public but he posted pics of both of them and martin started following him. swedish house mafia guys were also there (assumption carlos may have been there too as even though there were no pics the guy started following him as well though carlos didn't follow back)

nov 2023 - that hug at the vegas gp. local papers reported lando was also in the club with martin and max v but there are no pics and as he was probably still in some pain after his crash it's likely they confused thierry v with lando.

dec 2023 - ski trip with lando's friends. martin flew directly back from gigs in singapore and malaysia to join up with them.

to be continued...

and that's just the stuff we know about lol. bffs of w/e else, anyone's guess at this point, but they really did become very close very quickly.

Anon, I am giving you a big ole fat kiss on the forehead. God bless you for this breakdown ❤️❤️❤️

So much stuff happens throughout the season that I routinely forget tiny details (especially ones you've listed here like the family dinner in New York). To see them all spelled out here is 😘🤌

[dandysnob]

Would you mind giving us your favourite interview-moments of Paul? Much love to you 💙

Much love to you, too, Anon! ヾ(・ω・*)ノ💓 I love this Ask, thank you!

I'd like to focus on interviews that made me smile or laugh so hard that I keep a clip on my phone to watch again when I need to cheer myself up!

Paul Landers Talks New Album, Fire and More, 2017 📺 : I love this interview, because besides containing nice anecdotes and the gem “if no one dies, we'll have a new album out soon,” Paul randomly shits on Italian rock music which always makes me laugh! [e.g. 💩]

Telehit, Mexico, 2001 📺 : Iconic interview chock-full of moments that I still quote today! Paul exclaiming RAA RAA gives me life every time tbh! [e.g. 🗣️] I freaking love when he makes the hand gesture of groping the air like when you grope fruit in the supermarket to see if it's good and then says "it's a very cheap trick from us to slimy into the people." Bonus Till getting a laugh out of it!

VIVA TV 📺 : I could not help but include Paul who for once keeps his mouth shut and just makes expressions while Olli talks. Bless him, he's trying so hard.

ROCK HARD VIDEO, 2001 📺 : This is one of my favourite interviews of all time. If you've never watched it, I urge you to do so because it's interesting, stupid cute and full of great gems. The explanation he gives as to why they called the album Mutter always makes me smile. Bonus messy ciambellino rosso my beloved 🤲🏻🍩❤️

"Rammstein: Paris" Premiere 📺 : Last but not least, Paul explaining how he holds his guitar. Bonus Richard making him laugh. 💕