#this is childish but I honestly don't give two fucks

[fiendishfables]

"You already know how much I love you~"

A 2024 Valentines Day Special Ft. Luci + Reader

a/n: Happy Valentines! I don't have a valentine (its my cat) but fuck that, I'm going to snag some cheap candy-

summary: Lucifer decides to take you to a special spot; one where everything began anew for him and his true beauty is revealed

warnings: fluff, cuddles, wholesomeness, Luci just needs some cuddles guys, just cute shi-

words: 1.6k+

additional notes: I like to think there is just some random cherry blossom hidden away somewhere in Hell and that is where our short king got the honor of falling. Or he created the tree upon impact, one of the two. I JUST WANT HIM TO HAVE SOMETHING NICE, THE POOR BABY-

This was honestly not what you had pictured in your brain when your boyfriend had said he wanted to take you somewhere special...

Currently, you and your boyfriend, Lucifer, were making your way up a hill. Its adorning grass was a brownish-green, making it look like autumn had begun to actually seep into the worlds crust instead of just being dusted off until next year. Another thing: it looked strangely untouched. Everything in Hell looked like literal shit, so this was a pleasant surprise, other than its stained color.

You looked up to see your boyfriend had left your side and was practically sprinting up the hill, like he was a Labrador who just saw a squirrel. You raised a quizzical eyebrow but felt the small, familiar tug of a smile grappling for a hold on each corner of your lips. A sigh slipped from you as you shook your head with amusement at his childish antics. He really never failed to make you smile.

Once you had decided to pick up your own pace with what you were using to climb the grassy hill, he had already reached the top. You met him in the next thirty seconds that followed.

Atop the hill he had brought you both to was a beautiful, giant, cherry blossom tree. Its pink petals swayed gently in the wind, brushing against one another and the branches that held them together in clusters. A few delicate petals would come free from the hold of a branch every few seconds, going on to continue its life in a different way, as it drifted towards the ground.

This particular blossom you were watching drift downwards was then caught, gently, in the hand of your boyfriend.

You had almost forgotten he was there, having been mesmerized by the beautiful pink and white colored tree hanging above both of your heads. Seeing him now, he was sitting underneath the cherry blossom, a soft smile on his face. He shifted his fingers so the plush, pink petal was between his thumb and pointer finger, holding it up and out to you like a silent offering.

You chuckled softly, walking further under the tree and plopping yourself down beside Lucifer, watching him examine the petal between his fingertips, almost as if deciding what to do with it.

He turned to look at you again, smiling still (when was he ever not when he was around you). That smile then turned to a smug smirk as he gently blew on the petal now in his palm, whistling softly. The action sent the petal drifting towards you and up, into your hair, where it found a place to nestle itself comfortably amongst the strands, lightly tickling your forehead as it passed by.

"Magic?"

You gave him a small smirk of your own. You knew he liked to do these little acts to impress you; not saying they failed to deliver, but you knew to expect them by now. Still, it was always a pleasant experience.

The ground beneath the two of you was covered in soft, little cherry blossom petals, showing the trees shedding tendencies. The grass that could be seen under the mirage of petals was actually green here, unlike the shit stained looking grass you had walked on leading up to the hill.

He offered a smile, a nod, then looked away, letting out a sigh as he raised his head again. His eyes seemed to be scanning the cities of Hell below; the hill gave a perfect view of all his people, the bustling populations giving light to the aspect that Hell was more alive than the pricks up in Heaven would ever accept.

Whilst observing all of these things, you also seemed to sense that your boyfriend was being a lot quieter than usual. He hadn't spoken since he had brought you up here to sit together. Not once. It was out of character.

"Luci?"

You spoke to break the ever-growing silence, turning your head and shifting your eyes back up to his, only to see him already staring at you. This caused you to flinch a bit in surprise. He noticed this and instantly looked ashamed, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly as he looked away from you.

"Ah- uh, sorry, darling. Just..thinking..."

He spoke almost nervously, like he was expecting something; walking on eggshells.

You looked at him sympathetically, smiling gently as you took his hand in yours.

"Babe, what's wrong? You can talk to me, y'know?" You said, gently running your thumb over his knuckles in a hopes to soothe him if possible.

He took a deep breath, your eyes trained on the steady rise and fall of his chest. There was silence for many minutes before he finally spoke.

"This is the place I fell."

You raised an eyebrow at his statement, the words taking a second to process before you realized he was talking about the cherry blossom. You looked up on instinct, taking in the swaying colors of pink and white, the wind letting them dance around freely and fall how they pleased.

"You...here? Like, fell...here? Of all places?"

You were a tad bit confused. The King of Hell, a.k.a. Lucifer, a.k.a. your boyfriend...fell in this exact spot? Fell where you were sitting right this second?

His nod was the only thing to answer you besides the delicately whistling wind.

"Well...its much nicer an area than I expected for what is to be deemed such a tragedy." You mustered an awkward smile. "Why would you bring me here?" You asked, now more curious than confused.

He looked over at you then back at his feet, bringing his knees up to his chest and wrapping his arms around them, like he was trying to shield himself from an invisible force.

"Well, ya know....I-I trust you a-and...I-I figured since, ya know, we've been together so long now...that maybe you'd wanna see the place most special to me..."

His slight stammering made a twinge of pity go through your heart but you quickly pushed it away. He didn't need pity right now. He needed support. This place had to be a bit of a touchy subject for him, considering its literally where he first landed when he was casted out from Heaven. You doubted it had many good memories attached to it.

"Most special?" You questioned. That did not make much sense in your mind.

"Yes. I feel like, in a way, my falling was another chance gifted to me. I mean, hey," He chuckled and his normal sparky attitude began shining through once again. "I'm King of Hell, am I not? I think I got a pretty good rep going." He puffed out his chest playfully, glancing over at you.

You laughed softly and leaned over to gently kiss his cheek. His already rosy cheeks amplified in color.

"That's one way to see it. I appreciate you showing me this place, Luci. You being vulnerable enough with me to tell me more about yourself and what's happened to you...I know it must be hard. This place sure is beautiful though." You smiled, looking upwards at the tree from underneath it, then back to him, a smirk replacing the smile.

"Do you think your fall is what caused it to grow with such vigor and beauty? Your fall is probably what birthed the tree, made it so beautiful and prosperous."

Lucifer blushed and waved a dismissive hand, biting his lip to fight his usual smile. This caused you to chuckle softly.

A soft, serene silence fell over the two of you. You could tell he was pondering your question just from the expression on his face. You hadn't expected him to actually try and answer it, if that's what he was planning on doing.

"...You really think so?"

His eyes were watery when he spoke again, as they turned their loyal gaze onto you. Just those words meant a lot to him and it showed, plain as day. He was rarely classified as a beautiful being. Not in Heaven and especially not by the living.

You smiled and nodded, slightly surprised by his reaction but going in full swing.

"I know so, Luci. There is no think about it. Someone with as beautiful a spirit as you is bound to spread that beauty. I have no doubt."

In the next second that followed your ceased speaking, Lucifer had flung himself on top of you. He sniffled as a few silent tears fell down his cheeks as he nuzzled his face into the crook of your neck, peppering soft kisses there. One of his hands held you close to him whilst the other carded gently through your hair, tangling the loose blossoms into the strands even further. He lifted his head to look at you, big watery eyes filled with so much affection; so much love for you it was insane.

Hellens, just the way he looked at you. Like you were the most beautiful thing he had ever yet to lay his eyes on. Like he was a dying man and you a fresh drink of water. Like the one ray of sunshine on a rainy day. Like you were a goddess.

But not just any goddess.

His.

His goddess.

One of a kind.

Your hand gently came up to sprinkle some more of the pink and white colored cherry blossoms into his pale blonde hair that you had come to love so much. Pink really was a good fit for him, you thought.

"I love you..." He whispered softly, sniffling. "So..so much. More than you'd ever be able to understand."

You smiled and let your lips meet in a gentle kiss, before parting once again so you could speak.

"I love you too, Luci. But I think you already know how much."

And it was true.

[goldustwomun]

pacifier (s.b.)

pairing: sirius black x younger potter! reader

summary: something about your relationship with sirius black had never sit quite right with you, and now that he's back after two years of travelling the world, you're beginning to think that you'll soon find out what'll happens if the two of you finally fall over the edge of whatever precipice you've been teetering close to all these years. anyway, you've got to work with him all summer, so what's the worst that could happen?

warnings: allusions to sex (minors dni!!!), swearing, cocky sirius and like kind of an annoying younger sister reader (but also that's literally me lol), bad transitions between light hearted banter and angst but i'm trying my best RIP, i imagine sirius to be mid-20s and reader only 3/4 years younger (but everyone is OF AGE), mommy issues if you squint

wc: 4.9k+

note: soooo i'm back :D again :D i'm almost done with second year and actually somewhat ahead with all my papers (with very minimal finals; def recommend being a history major x) and i've just been missing the community so enjoy this! i had this first chapter posted a while back (like maybe a year) but it was actually ass so i've redone it a little :)))) as always, reblogs and comments are MUCH appreciated and i can't wait to interact w/ y'all over this because i have been DAYDREAMING about brother's bf sirius :')

Oh but, babe, you know I've tried and failed But you just don't know how it feels To lose something you never have and never will

“What do you mean he’s working at the shop as well?!” you all but screeched, chasing your Mother around the kitchen, feeling a lot like the pesky youngest child you were. 

“He needs some help so we offered to give him a job. Honestly sweetheart, aren’t you too old for this childish feud?”

“Too old? Shouldn’t you be saying that to him? He’s like– thirty or something, and still continues to be the bane of my existence. Fucking Bla–”

Your Mother whirled on you abruptly, brandishing the wooden spoon she was about to stir the boiling pot with right in your face.

“Oi, language! I would tell him the same but unluckily for you, you’re my daughter and currently living under my roof, so you get to hear it first.” She gave you a saccharine sweet smile, the kind that had you biting back the urge to roll your eyes.

“--now, he’s been gone for such a long time, and we’re all very excited to see him, so don’t ruin this reunion with any more of your tantrums.”

You opened your mouth once more, intent on not letting the argument die there, but your Father bounded into the kitchen at the same moment, ruffling up your hair with a “Hey there, kiddo,” before promptly moving on to snake his hands around your Mother’s waist.

“Looking as beautiful as always, my dear,” he cooed into her ear. She let out an uncharacteristic giggle that had you bolting from the kitchen before you were scarred any further.

Your parents’ tooth-aching affections for each other was just that: sweet, but sickly all the same.

Somewhere inside of you, in between the urge for unattainable perfection and the fear of failure, you yearned for a love like theirs. Something genuine but passionate, able to withstand the test of time.

James, your older brother, had found it with Lily, and their son Harry being a product of their young but no less intense love. 

You loved that kid like he was your own. Would beg James to let you come over, play with the babbling toddler for a few hours, even going as far as to offer up your weekends, encouraging the young couple to “go out, live a little!”. But they were about as infatuated with their own child as you were, and had a never-ending supply of friends who were equally as eager to help out.

And one of those always eager friends was currently pounding his stupid fist against your stupid front door, and you were already riled up from the news your mother had broken to you only moments earlier, head pounding and fists balled into shaking fists, that you couldn’t take seeing his face quite literally in front of you, as well. 

You shoved past James, knocking him back a step as his hand reached for the door to let his best mate in. You caught a glimpse of him on the doorstep, the first in almost two years– hair unruly like he’d just rolled out of bed, long, black strands; newly tanned skin blushing under the heat of the sun; those thick, brooding eyebrows that raised up in your direction – eughh. 

“What’s got your knickers in a bunch?” James called at your retreating figure, shouting loud enough to be heard over your heavy footsteps despite the carpeted floor. 

“Ask your best mate over there!” you answered back with a bite, slamming your room door shut.

“Fuck,” he sighed, defeated, yanking his confused friend in and a chucking a thumb towards the stairs. “How’ve you managed to piss her off before you even got here?” he asked incredulously. “Peace– we had peace in this house for the past two years since you’ve been off, and now look–! It’s a bloody riot!”

“Oi– I’ve done nothing,” he moaned indignantly, hanging his coat and scarf on the gold-crested hooks by the door. “--I think,” he added for good measure after a beat. "I mean, I've only just stepped inside."

Sirius had yet to quite grasp why you got under his skin so quick, squirming between his nerves like a misfired electrical impulse.

You’d grown up together, spent every waking moment in each other’s presence when he was at the Potter residence (which happened to be just about always given his own family situation). If books and movies were to be trusted, what with fiction being so reminiscent of real-life, he'd have expected be like some sort of brotherly figure to you.

But even the thought of it had bile creeping up his through, as if it was so unfathomably wrong his body refused to entertain the possibility of it.

So no. Something about you and your irritatingly know-it-all personality, shrill when indignant voice (which was rather often around him), your need to always be right – something about you brought the worse out of him.

Had him constantly searching for something new to point out, to irritate you all over again, hit the nail on your specific head - something to really push you that little bit over the edge. 

It wasn't even like he enjoyed it, watching you get all huffy, nostrils flared, brows knitted together, face verging on a flushed red. Sirisu was well aware that with every jab the two of you threw at each other, things got a little more out of hand.

Right before he had left, two years journeying through the glades of Scotland, then France, Greece, Türkiye, India, Taiwan (he'd been close to everywhere), he had made the mistake of aiming a particularly ruthless dig at you, and watching your face crumple, devastated and defeated, it had finally cracked him inside.

But there wasn't anything he could do about it then, what with leaving the next day, and two years later, it seemed a little too late.

The rest of the Potter family didn’t share your sentiments about Sirius, and rather adored him immeasurably. Had since he’d taken to hiding out in their house after a particularly brutal fight at home when he was only eleven. Heck, he’d even attended every Potter-family gathering, dinner, birthday, you name it, since then. It was why he came over every Sunday for a roast, pudding and some chat – he could never put into words what your family had done for him, the safety, security, home, even, they'd given him when he’d been lost and entirely clueless of what a real family looked like.

So he made the thirty-minute drive, every Sunday, much to your irritation. He plastered on the biggest smile for your Mum, complimenting every minute detail of the meal she cooked for the family, drank a glass of whiskey and smoked a cigar with your Dad; he was even Harry’s favourite, always humming quiet melodies into the youngest Potter’s ear.

With him away, he’d missed out on the family time he usually looked forward to every weekend. Mondays seemed a lot less dreadful after having a belly-full of Mrs Potter’s food.

Still, he’d sent postcards and printed pictures of everywhere he went, the sights he’d seen, people he’d met. It wasn’t the same, not without the lot of you to pester him but he’d needed some time to find himself.

He still wasn’t sure if he’d found what he was looking for, but the money had to have run out eventually so he was back home, ready to work and settle down in his life for once after graduating Hogwarts. 

Sirius followed James into the living room where he found Lily, sipping on a glass of red, sitting by the empty fireplace. Instead, a window had been cracked in to let the temperate wind in.

She perked up as they entered, waving with that soul-wrenching smile of hers that could persuade even the most strong-willed of men into submission. 

“Pads, you’re back!” she called from her seat. "And you've grown a moustache-- interesting choice of facial hair." Sirius, however, raised an eyebrow at her questioningly, ignoring her greeting-slash-judgement as he peered into the empty crib by her side, even going as far as to search under it as if the toddler might have escaped.

“Harry’s gone to bed in the guest room. There was a bit of a shouting match before you arrived,” James explained, sinking into the space beside his wife and pulling her into his side. “Actually, now that I think about it, there was a lot of shouting after you arrived as well.” 

Lily snorted, snuggling into her husband without hesitation, and Sirius couldn’t help but avert his eyes, feeling entirely like he was imposing on an intimate moment as the two of them whispered in the other’s ear.

“Well, don’t mind me. Sitting here, all by my lonesome, no company or polite chatter to partake in, not even my dashing God son to entertain me” he sighed, dramatically, to no one in particular. James rolled his eyes at his best friend’s antics, chucking a frilly throw-pillow at his face (that’s what they’re for, right?) which he just as easily caught. 

“Har-Har! Ever the clown, Paddy,” James mocked, flipping him off just in time for his Mum to walk in and see.

“James! Don’t aim such crude displays at my son,” she scolded, wrapping her wrinkled arms around Sirius’ shoulders from behind his chair. She leaned down, kissing the top of his head affectionately. Sirius only whimpered in agreement, leaning into her motherly touch and whining on and on about how James was being a right bully. 

“My sweet child, I’ve missed you!” She beamed down at him, and that longing Sirius sometimes felt for his own Mother’s approval, her devotion or fondness, it lessened. 

“But you didn’t– He was just!-- You missed– arghh!” James groaned defeatedly, head flailed back to rest against the sofa, receiving no sympathies from his giggling wife and glaring Mother. “I’m starting to understand why she hates you.”

Sirius’ eyes flashed at that– did you really hate him? Had it gotten to that point?

At the mention of your name but current absence, Mrs Potter ordered, “Go call your sister for dinner, I’ve set the table.” 

He began to protest, failing to come up with a half-decent reason why he can’t walk up the two flights of stairs and pull your petulant frame from your bed– but Sirius interrupted in time, before James could make any more of a fool himself in front of his own Mother.

“I’ll go get her. Got to figure out what I did this time,” he offered coolly. 

Euphemia, that is, Mrs Potter, had a strict no-apparting rule in her house, had lost too many expensive vases from James and Sirius’ apparition-sprees the second they’d turned seventeen.

You already had your licence, having been of legal age for some time, and had, since graduating (top of the class, as you tended to point out, much to your Ravenclaw friends’ dismay) from Hogwarts, found a job at a school in the muggle world, teaching children English Literature in preparation of some exam -- O Levels, you’d called them. 

Sirius thought it to be some sort of torture device - these O Levels – but you’d smacked him across the head in admonishment with whatever book was in your hand before he could say much else. Having a family-run bookshop made it so that the books, or the weapons (in Sirius' mind at least), were in endless supply for you.

Your love for reading had come from him, your Father, from when he’d stay up till the late hours of the night, hushed whispers under your bed sheet so your Mother wouldn’t hear, as he read you the Classics in animated voices that had you completely enchanted. He made sparks fly from the tip of his wand, bright colours that your little eyes couldn’t quite get enough of.

You loved being a wizard, were eternally grateful for the world you lived in and the undeniable awe of it all. But words, books, literature – they were enough magic for you, took you to places you could only ever dream to visit, and had you feeling such all-consuming emotions that sometimes, you wondered if you’d ever make it to the end of the page, or chapter, or book. 

“Oi– your Mum’s put out dinner, she’s calling you downstairs,” he called through the thick wood of your door. 

Sirius didn’t know why he such an uneasy feeling settled into the pit of his stomach, like he'd swallowed some moldy bread or a particularly strong cider.

He's known you your whole life, watched you graduate from pencil to quill, and then again from Hogwarts.

Two years was a long a time, and the thought of you holding what he had said all those months ago -- what he hadn't meant, not really -- he was dreading the confrontation.

He nudged the door open when you didn’t respond, only to find you slumped across your bed, glaring, silently, at the ceiling and the pale-orange ring of light from the lamp on your bedside table.

You certainly looked different– older, possibly? He couldn’t quite place what had changed, only that he knew something had. In the way you dressed, styled your hair, held yourself. Even the look of your room– no longer plastered in repeated patterns of owls and roses, but instead a single wall painted a burnt umber and with the remaining covered in tapestries and muggle band posters hanging across every wall.

A stack of vinyls were shoved into one side of your room, along with stacks of books, some old and missing a few pages, while others were untouched. 

You heard the door click open, sitting up on your elbows to see a Sirius, oozing an annoying amount of effortless confidence, and leaning against your doorframe. 

Something in your chest stumbled almost immediately. He looked the same as the day he'd scolded you before leaving, and those stupid, brown eyes of his, like murky swamps you wouldn't be caught dead looking into, were training on you.

Though, he might’ve managed to actually tan, now that you really looked at him, imagining the broad planes of his shoulders, hidden by a thin linen button up, were more sun-kissed than milky-pale now. 

Except you refused to even entertain the thought. You were not thinking of him or his skin or his bare chest or--

“What’s with your face?” you asked, already knowing you'd regret the answer.

“Was that meant to be a greeting?” His eyebrow raised in amusement.

“Hi Sirius-- what’s with your face?” you answered, again, between clenched teeth. 

“You changed your room,” was his only response, and really, what did he expect to say to that?

"I did. Figured I'd use your absence wisely," you snarked back, meeting his gaze as you continued, "--you know, finally grow up and all that."

And you hadn't forgotten, but he didn't blame you.

You got up at his lack of silence, walking the few steps up to him, head tilted like a cat, wary of her surroundings but curious nonetheless.

"Was there something you wanted, Sirius?"

And fuck if the way you said his name didn't have him fighting whatever foreign feeling, urge, instinct was shouting at him in that moment.

You walked past, trembling as your shoulders touched, making it all the way to the bottom of the stairs before you had your moment of revelation as well.

Somehow, whether it had been a slow process over his two-year absence or something far more sudden in the past few minutes, he'd wormed his way back between the cracks of your heart, and this time, you worried you wouldn't survive.

The quiet jingle of the bell tickled your ears as you opened the door to the bookshop, dust immediately invading your senses as you fought back a harsh cough.

Your Dad pushed in front of you, forcing the door to stay open by propping a stack of intimidatingly large books in front of it. You laughed silently to yourself, noting how they were all Dickens (he hated Dickens, said his novels were disturbingly boring and unnecessarily detailed). 

“So, you can dust a little, and sweep the floor, before we open. Count the money in the till, as well, that’s very important,” he noted off, and you suddenly wished you had a pen and a pad of paper to write it all down.

It wasn’t like you hadn’t been helping out at the shop since when you were younger, but this was the first time you’d been granted the responsibility of having it all to yourself (minus the inconvenience that was Sirius Black). 

You were deemed an adult now – loved to point it out any chance you got, and that meant that your Dad trusted you enough to not hover over your shoulder every time you took a shift. He was working fewer hours, though now, none, as he wanted to finish the novel he’d been writing for the past decade after melodramatically announcing at the dinner table that “It’s time!” 

You weren’t sure what that exactly meant, but you weren’t about to argue with the man paying you an overly generous ten pounds an hour. 

You didn’t need the money for yourself, what with still living at your parent’s house, but you wanted to contribute to the house and expenses and what not, even if it was a minuscule sum. 

“Another thing,” he added, stopping, rather abruptly, in front of you, voice worryingly grave as he placed his large palms over either of your shoulders. “Please,” he begged, brows dipping, “don’t fight with Sirius in front of the customers.”

“I haven’t even done anything and you’re already after me,” you objected, pulling back from his usually comforting hold and pulling the broom out from behind the counter. His hands fell defeatedly against his sides as he sighed, standing in your way before you could mope yourself into a tizzy before the work day had even started. 

“I didn’t mean it like that,” he ensured, pulling you into his tight embrace once more. “You know you’re my number one, sweetheart. Just don’t like seeing you so upset.”

James always teased you for being your Father’s favourite, and you’d never argue, relishing in his pointed fingers and sneering words, because it was true– there was something between you and your Father, an understanding that no one else had clued in on.

He eased your worries like no one else could, smoothed irked creases across your face, replacing them with belly-hurting laughter lines and a grin so wide, you were worried it would fall off your face.

Anyway, James was the same with your Mum. You found her difficult to communicate with, what with her being as hot-heated as you were, so as much as you and your Dad got along, you butted heads with your Mum just as much.

“It’s ‘cause you two are so similar, like twins, I tell you!” But it did little to calm your nerves around her, or stoke the flames of anger you so often felt. 

You were about to respond, ready to tell your Dad just how much you loved him, when someone crashed through the door, slamming into the counter you were standing behind. You turned, eyes connecting with your (late) colleague. He looked utterly windswept, as if he’d run – or been chased – the whole way there. 

“You okay, son?” your Dad asked, worry shifting from you to the panting, bent-over Sirius. 

“Me? Oh– peachy, just– peachy,” he answered between heavy breaths, waving off his doting hands. “Sorry I’m late, got a little carried away with something and lost track of time.”

You were conscious of how your Dad didn’t offer Sirius the same advice, to not pick a fight or argue or whatever it was the two of you did, and you couldn’t help but roll your eyes at how he had everyone charmed.

So you busied yourself behind the till, doing as you were instructed and counting the money, writing down the number of each of the bills on a notepad you pulled from the drawer at your waist. 

Your Dad left soon after, turning the closed sign out front to open as he wished you, and Sirius, good luck. 

“Guess it’s just the two of us, little Potter,” Sirius pointed out, already sounding bored as he fell into a stool at your side. He leaned his head against his arm, stretching it from side to side as he groaned at his tense muscles.

You didn’t mean to stare, swore it wasn’t something you’d let become a habit, but your gaze immediately travelled to the exposed skin of his neck, zeroing in on the trail of newly-formed purple bruises  down the side.

You snorted, shaking your head at him, slamming the money compartment shut a little too aggressively so that it caught Sirius’ attention. He recognised your expression to be something close to amusement, jabbing you in your side until you were scowling and slapping his fingers away.

“What’s wrong with you– you’re acting like a fucking child,” you admonished, moving out of reach and resting a hand on your hip. 

“Why’d you make that face?” he asked instead of answering your question, nodding at you like it was you who had started it.

“It’s nothing,” you went with, hearing your Father’s words echoing in your mind from just moments ago. You needed to diffuse the situation before you really got mad, because past that point, you weren’t responsible for what you said– or did. 

So you ventured into the aisles of books, a curious Sirius on your heels, following you like a lost, yapping puppy. “If it’s nothing then why are you running away?” he pushed back.

You ignored him pointedly, stopping to stack a few books and dust along the shelves. No one had come in yet, still too early in the morning for any tourists to stumble upon your admittedly quaint but bursting shop. 

The sunlight barely filtered past the dense collection of books and mahogany shelves that lined the walls, but the windows stretched to the tall ceilings, and if you went up the spiralling staircase at the centre of the store, you’d find yourself in a cosy loft space, bathed in gold and stuffed with arm chairs and sofas for people to sit and read in. 

It was your favourite part of the store, and you were seriously debating hiding up there on your first day, just to get away from the walking-plague that followed you. 

“Come on– tell me,” he whined, standing too close for your liking. You side-stepped away, brushing a cloth against the worn covers of the Mystery section. He followed suit, returning to his previous position, and this time, you had no way out with the wall of books you’d met. 

You turned, facing him and finally acknowledged his presence. “You lied,” you stated matter-of-factly, loving that you actually had the upper-hand with him. As much as you prided yourself with being quick-witted, Sirius always seemed to find a way to stay on-top.

“Gonna have to give me something more than that, darling. Lied about what?” he countered, raising an eyebrow at you. 

You bristled at the endermeant but continued nonetheless.,

“You weren't busy. You were screwing some girl according to the bruises on your neck,” you stared pointedly at the affected area now, though it was covered by his hair in this position. His hand flew to his neck, as if hoping to shield them from your gaze.

“That’s none of your business Potter,” he countered, irritated. 

“It actually is my business when you’re both late to your job and lying to my Father,” you threw back, shoving forward and relishing in his slight stumble back– as if he hadn’t yet noticed the two of you were so so close. 

“You can’t–” his eyes were wide, worried, as he grabbed your elbow, forcing you to meet his gaze, “You can’t tell him. He’ll be so disappointed and I can’t–”

You frowned at the look of genuine distress written so plainly across of his face. If you two were anyone else, you might've let it go.

Might've--

“Well tough shit, Sirius. You’re an adult, now. This is the real world we’re talking about and not whatever fantasy you've been frolicking about these past two years." You were fuming, unnecessarily so, but both of you knew this was fight had been years in the making.

"I understand you lack the ability to form real, genuine connections but come on, Sirius. You're not a fucking teenager. Grow a pair and take some responsibility for once in your life!"

And really, you deserved it, now that you thought back. His anger was reasonable but your need to poke straight through his ribcage, wrap your fist around his heart and squeeze tight, was not. 

“Fuck you, Potter.” he bit out. “Just because you're not getting any doesn't mean the rest of us have to be equally as miserable."

It was already going to shit, Sirius was well aware of it, but he couldn't get himself to stop. To just shut up.

“Maybe if you weren’t so fucking uptight all the time someone might actually give it to you too," his voice now barely above a whisper with his anger deflated as he stared, pained, at your reaction.

And it didn’t take long for you to react -- for your hand to fly up and connect with his cheek, hard. You hadn't done anything two years ago but he thinks he saw you consider it. So the fact that you had finally, struck across the face, spoke to how different things really were. How different you were.

"Potter, I--" and he was speechless when he really shouldn't have been. He swallowed, trying again. “I’m sorry,” he whispered then, fighting the urge to look away from your glassy stare. “I’m sorry, Potter. You know I don’t mean it.”

What you hated most was that you did know. You knew you both brought out the worst in each other. Only, you could never figure out why that was. Why you wanted to hurl insults at him for every comment or look or the stupid way he’d string together the most perfect sentence and his irritating eyes and mouth and–

“Excuse me? Is anyone here?” 

You inhaled, all sudden, as if only just realising what you had done. You brushed past him without a word, needing, more than ever, to put some space between the two of you. If not for your anger then for whatever pesky emotion was seeping through your cracks.

You were (reluctantly) pulled from wherever your thoughts had been racing to as you called into the store, “Just one moment!”

Sirius debated if this was a sign for him to get back onto a train to anywhere you were not. It didn’t matter if he had no money or nowhere to be, but if it meant he could avoid maiming you with his words, he couldn’t quite see a way out of his predicament. 

“Sirius!” you shouted again, no longer faking your emotions but rather genuinely just exasperated by him once more. 

“I’m coming! I’m coming!” He managed to not get lost in the labyrinth of books, and found you by the travel section, chatting good-naturedly with a blonde in a tight dress.

“How can I help, doll?” he asked the blonde in question. His one tactic for almost every conundrum he’d ended up in was avoidance. And bloody hell was he good at it. 

He smiled at her, the customer, doing little to hide his admiration for the legs she had on display. She flushed a pretty pink, averting her gaze, lip between her teeth. Bingo! 

“Christ, you’re disgusting,” you muttered, mouth pouting and quiet enough that only he could hear.

“Only for you, sweetheart, only for you,” he bit back, not wanting the currently oblivious customer clue in on their conversation. “So, how can I help?”

“She needs that book–” you pointed to the top shelf, well out of reach. “--the green spine that says Amsterdam, but I can’t reach it and the step ladder is too heavy.”

“Alas! Only ever needed for my body, it seems,” he moaned with an irritating amount of flourish. 

“Whatever it takes to get the book down– do what you must, Black.” You patted his chest reassuringly, taking your spot, once again, behind the cash register.  

“So– planning a trip are you?” Sirius asked in between excessive displays of strength as he hauled the bulky ladder with a single hand. You glared at the girl as she swooned at him, wanting, rather unreasonably, for her to combust right where she stood.

But that was a ridiculous thought to begin with. You could barely stand to be even within a metre’s distance of the guy, let alone on the receiving end of his affections. You were tired, emotional and dehydrated. Must be. Though a glance at the clock had you realising it had barely been an hour since your day had started. 

So, maybe just emotional and dehydrated. 

“I’m going to get a coffee from across the street,” you announced, slugging your tote bag onto your shoulder as you walked past the preoccupied pair. Not waiting for a response, you stepped out into the early morning sun, frowning, for once, at the glare in your eyes and not the irritant you’d left behind. 

It was easier to refer to him as something pesky, infectious, fungus-like even, rather than the only person who knew how to break your heart (and despite your somewhat impenetrable facade, you let him do just that every time).

please please PLEASE reblog & leave some feedback <3 i'll boop you if you do x

[ericshoney]

Hide and Seek ~ Chris Sturniolo

You had just arrived at the triplets place, after receiving a message from Chris saying he was bored and lonely, so you made your way over quickly, not keeping your best friend waiting.

"Chris, I'm here." You called as you entered the quiet house.

"Yay! I was slowly dying of boredom!" He exclaimed, rushing to greet you in a tight hug.

"Where are Nick and Matt?" You asked, looking for the other two.

"Went to the store, Matt said the car needed gas too and I didn't wanna leave." He answered.

"So you called me over." You said.

"Yes!" He cheered, making you laugh.

"Not that I'm complaining, my day has been nothing but watching Netfix again." You said with a giggle.

"See! I knew you needed to come over! Keep both of us sane!" He said loudly.

"Alright buddy, what did you wanna do?" You asked, already kicking your shoes off.

"What about hide and seek?" He suggested.

"Fuck yeah!" You cheered.

One thing all three of the guys loved about you was your childish and fun personality. You matched well with Chris, basically being the female version of him, meaning you could take part in his crazy antics and random ideas, giving Nick and Matt a break.

"I'm gonna hide first!" You exclaimed, before Chris could argue.

"Ugh, fine." He whined.

You giggled and pushed him gently towards the stairs to his room, mumbling how he had to count down there, giving you a chance to find a good hiding spot.

Once Chris had started counting, you looked around, wondering where to hide. You knew Matt and Nick's bedrooms were an obvious spot. You then thought to try and trick Chris. You rushed to Matt's room, the door fully shut, but pushed it open slightly, to make it seem like you were hiding in there. You then managed to squeeze down the side of the sofa, making yourself as small as possible and throwing a blanket over you for extra coverage.

What you didn't know was, Nick and Matt had arrived back early, the gas station being empty so they got served quickly. The eldest two entered the house, coming up to the kitchen to drop off the food they bought from the store too. Nick glanced over and noticed your shoes by the stairs.

"Y/n? You here?" He called.

"Shh!" You called from your hiding spot.

"Did that blanket just tell us to shh?" Matt questioned.

Nick came over and pulled the blanket off you, he and Matt giving you a questioning look.

"What are you doing?" Matt asked.

"Hiding!" You exclaimed in a whisper, trying to grab the blanket back.

"From what?" Nick asked.

"Chris! We're playing hide and seek and he's nearly done counting!" You replied.

"Okay, we never saw you then." Matt said, as Nick threw the blanket back over you, just as Chris appeared from the stairs.

"Oh hey guys. Your back quick." Chris mentioned, seeing his brothers.

"Yeah, the gas station wasn't busy so we got in and out quickly, same with the store." Nick said.

"Oh cool. Well Y/n is here and we're playing hide and seek." He said, not knowing you had just told them.

"That explains the shoes." Matt said, playing along.

Chris nodded and ran upstairs to Nick's room, wondering if you were hiding up there.

"So do we just sit here and pretend we haven't seen you?" Nick questioned, sitting on the opposite end of the sofa.

"Yes!" You exclaimed.

Nick shook his head, playing on his phone as Matt giggled. Chris soon came running down and stood in the middle of the room.

"She's not up there, Matt's room next!" He shouted, dashing to the next bedroom.

"My nose is itchy." You mumbled, trying not to move.

"Shut the fuck up. Part of hide and seek is to be quiet." Nick mumbled, his eyes still focused on his phone.

"Not in here!" Chris shouted from Matt's room.

"I honestly don't know how he hasn't checked here yet, it's obvious." Matt mentioned.

A few minutes went by and Chris was still dashing around, checking every part of the house, besides where you were actually hiding. Matt and Nick shared a look as Chris came back.

"Dude..." Matt muttered.

"You serious?" Nick questioned.

"What? Oh wait!" Chris cheered, finally coming over and pulling the blanket off you.

"Found you!" He exclaimed.

"Finally." You mumbled, scratching your nose.

"Our place isn't even that big yet you couldn't find her." Matt said in disbelief.

"Well how about you both join in now." Chris suggested.

"Why not, got nothing better to do." Nick agreed, placing his phone down.

You smiled, knowing your day just got better.

[dsireland86]

SNEAK PEEK OF "MASKED"

Tags are opened. Just let me know

@poisongirl616 @lma1986 @thefallennightmare @foliosgirl @xxkittenkissesxx @concreteemo

18+ below the cut

"What the fuck, Noah, can you stop that, please,” you lash out, unable to handle the way he’s absorbing your very existence.

The table falls silent as both pairs of eyes fall on you.

Noah grins, shyly looking away for a moment before turning his attention back to you.

“Stop what?” He lays both hands out on the table in front of him, the tops of them and his long fingers on full display. You’ve always had a thing for Noah’s hands, his tattoos especially, which is why it was so tempting for you to lean over and study them. Noah knows this. The smirk covering his lips was a dead giveaway.

“Stop looking at me like that,” you order.

Noah scoffs, glancing down at his lap for a moment. When he raises his head, the hair that falls over his eyes delivers a strong blow to the defensive walls you’ve put up in the last hour.

“Like what, Princess?” he taunts. “How I’m looking at you?”

Noah’s pet name for you sends a chill down your spine. He’s teasing you, purposely getting on that last nerve of yours and hoping to get a rise out of you. It’s like he’s playing a childish game, hoping you’ll give in and give up.

You roll your eyes and bury your face in the crook of Folio’s neck, inhaling his intoxicating scent that always seems to calm you down, lacing your fingers through his.

He can tell by the way you grip his hand that you’re upset, but with a few whispers against your ear, he tells you to play along for a little bit, just to see how far Noah’s willing to go. You look at Nick like he’s just lost his mind, but he’s actually serious. The nervous butterflies in your stomach begin to flutter over your lack of confidence to play along. Noah may irritate you, but his entire demeanor honestly terrifies you sometimes. But you trust Folio.

“Stop looking at me like you want to eat me or something,”

It comes out more aggressive than you mean for it to, and when Noah’s expression goes blank, your body goes rigid.

But you keep eye contact with him, challenging him, possibly at his own game.

“Well,” he finally says, tapping his fingers on the table and glancing over at Folio as a wide smile spreads across his face

“Maybe I’m hungry, Princess.” turning his sight back on you with a raised eyebrow. His face is dead serious and that terrifies you in the most god awful, sensual way possible. You frown, shaking your head as your heart hammers in your chest.

“Seriously, Noah, really?”

You glare at him, annoyed that he’s pulling you along this rabbit trail, making you chase the breadcrumbs of desperation for him, only so that he can make you feel like a horrible person in the end.

“What? You have a problem with me being hungry?”

Noah’s smugness is bold, a side of him you’ve seen, but have never experienced. And the fact that he’s behaving this way with Folio right next to you is a little disarming. But Nick doesn’t seem to be bothered by anything Noah’s saying, probably because he knows Noah’s words aren't anything but empty threats.

You catch Folio's grin as he looks over at Noah, almost in the same manner Noah looked at him a bit ago. Something is going on between the two of them, and you don't like it.

“What is going on with you two? You’re acting really weird, and I’m not sure how I feel about it.” Your eyes dart between the two of them as you hold your breath, waiting for them to answer. FInally, Noah shrugs and stands up, shoving his hands deep into the pockets of his hoodie. “I don’t know what you mean, Princess. There’s nothing going on.” He winks at you, throwing out a smile that makes you swallow the lump in your throat, and walks out of the restaurant just like that. A few seconds later, your phone vibrates against your leg. You pull it from your pocket to find the message is from Noah. Sighing, you open it, and instantly, your heart starts to pound as you forget to take a breath. The only thing he sent was a picture of his black ski mask with the words “Do You Want To Play A Game With Me, Princess” written across the bottom.

[shadow4-1]

Sweet n' Silly Lieutenant Simon "Ghost" Headcanons (SFW & NSFW)

Ghost is a character who has so many different facets of his personality that he represses for one reason or another. Sometimes, though, he can't hide things well enough. Here are a few headcanons (NSFW Under The Cut):

Ghost is very picky about the masks he wears. If he buys them pre-made (which is rare - he likes to make his own, he can sew), they have to be a very specific type of fabric. Of course, it has to have all the tactical advantages, but it has to be SOFT most of all. All of his clothing is soft for that matter. This man will NEVER, I repeat NEVER, be caught dead in anything starchy or itchy or scratchy. Even his bed sheets are that crazy 1000 thread count cotton. He likes soft things.

Speaking of soft things, Simon carries around a very small square of quilted fabric in whatever extra pocket he might have. It's actually a piece of a handkerchief his mother sewed for him as a child to keep him from taking his baby blanket with him to school. It's old and tattered and stained, but he carries it with him anyway. It's been with him through thick and thin (and the grave). He doesn't need to sleep with it, but if he's severely stressed, he'll hold onto it and examine it for a little bit. Sometimes, that fabric feels like it's the only thing tethering him to earth.

Would absolutely love to get his nails professionally done, but because of his appearance, he doesn't want to intimidate some poor nail lady. Instead, he opts to give himself mani-pedis. Sometimes, if he's feeling rebellious, he'll bust out his trusty bottle of black nail polish and go for it. It's not like anyone'll see it under his gloves. And God forbid if you walk in on him painting his toenails. He WILL kill you.

Ghost has some interesting food habits. He'll honestly eat whatever if he has to, but he would much prefer to eat simple, almost childish foods. He likes things like pasta, sandwiches, juice, and pudding. God, he loves pudding. A giant bowl of hot mac n' cheese and an entire 6-pack of prepackaged pudding is his favorite meal. He KNOWS its bad for him and it totally fucks up his very specific diet he uses to upkeep his frame, but he can't help it.

Has an intense skin care and oral care regimen despite the fact that almost no one will ever see it. His smile would make you go blind because he practically bleaches his fucking teeth - and also because he chose to smile with teeth.

He's quiet for a multitude of reasons. Yes, it's because he's observant and wants to be in control of his surroundings. But it's also because deep down he's still a shy boy. He can stand up for himself and others if he has to, he's grown into that part of himself. But as for meeting new people, he's shy. He doesn't know you, and he doesn't know if he WANTS to know you. He'd rather just eye you up and let your actions speak for themselves. And that's why Johnny is one of his favorites. Something about a person who can outwardly show their genuineness is his kryptonite (although of course they don't have to be as much of a puppy as Johnny - take for instance Price or Gaz)

Absolutely detests physical touch unless he initiates it or it's fleeting. Handsy people piss him off. But a light punch to the shoulder, a tap or two? It makes him feel normal. Normal people aren't afraid to touch each other in that casual sort of way. Ghost is kind of normal. At least he tries to be.

Fucking sucks at flirting. He comes across as dry and uninterested even if it's the opposite. He just hopes the person he's interested in can pick that up so they don't run off thinking he's a prick. If they do then fuck 'em. Ghost is happy being by himself. He's been alone for so long, what's another few years.

Has a very silent praise kink. If his lover tells him anything good about him, goes straight to his ego. He won't show it, but that "I like being with you" went straight to his cock and made him puff out his chest. Of course you do. He's great. He's always been great. Now he's really going to show you how great he is.

Ghost is a huge scent guy. He's very picky about what scents he enjoys, and if he has a lover, he can and will throw out all of their expensive fragrances (and soaps and lotions, etc). His lover HAS to smell a certain way to him, and he'll supply them with whatever he deems appropriate. By the time he's done, his lover will have to adopt a whole new skincare routine. Smelling like sex is obviously one of his top picks, although once again, he'd never say that aloud.

He's a very, VERY visual creature. He knows it makes him come across as a creep, but he loves just watching his lover. He loves picking up on their mannerisms and their quirks. He loves watching their body move when walking or showering. He loves seeing wet stains in his lover's underwear and indentations of his teeth in their skin. He truly devours EVERYTHING with his eyes.

Gets aroused by the weirdest of things. Bare hands on metal, that section of skin in between the collar of a shirt and a throat mic, blowing bubbles in gum. Sometimes, he's hard for nearly an entire mission because someone's voice is too raspy in the comms. (And yes, he's an avid ASMR lover. Those tingles he gets goes straight to his dick and he's ashamed about it. He would absolutely die if his lover sees his search history. They can't know he wants their tongue in his eardrums - no one can.)

Rarely jerks off. He represses all of his sexual energy until he physically can't anymore. He knows it's because deep down he's traumatized. Pleasure is something he doesn't feel like he's allowed to have. His lover should be allowed to have it. But him? No. Jerking off feels like such hedonistic behavior. He feels like a degenerate after. No jerking off. Besides, the more pent-up he is, the sexier his dreams get.

He's always been afflicted by crazy dreams - mainly nightmares. Sometimes, though, especially if he's pent up his dreams get sexual. For the most part they're pretty tame, par for the course sex dreams but when he really gets pent up? When he feels like he's going to burst? His dreams get so realistic they might as be reality. He gets rough and possesive and fucks his lover into his mattress only wo wake up and have to come to grips with the things he's WILLING to do to them. He's so used to being disciplined that the moment that mask drops he can't look at himself in the mirror.

[beautifulfuckup99]

First , Your writing and storylines are PERFECT

Keep them coming cause i wait for your updates girl🌶️😍😍😍

Can we have JK in a secret relationship with a foreign reader who travelled to Korea to spend a limited tome with him. But we all know JK, he was on live and somehow forgets to close it and they statt making out in the back ,leading to them going public of course🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭. Smut Smut Smut and spice😍✌️🌶️

The tears I just shed are so REAL lol. You warmed my heart, Girl. Thank you so much.

Title: With You.

Warning(s): SMUT, H8 Comments, and Hurt/Comfort

Author's Note: This is just full of JK being a walking green flag cause honestly, he gives me Golden Retriever!bf energy lol.

**********************************

"Honey, I'm home!" Jungkook calls playfully as he walks into the apartment with a bright smile plastered om his face. "I love saying that..." He laughs as you smile softly at his childish ways. You stretch out more before going back to relaxing on the couch. After being approved by the big suits, you found yourself on the first flight to Korea to finally spend some much-desired time with your boyfriend of one year.

You never saw yourself dating someone like Jungkook, and that wasn't a bad thing, it's just that you never expected someone like him to want someone like you. And it wasn't just because he was an idol either. He was just so... Amazing. And he was yours? It was mindboggling.

"How was the shoot today?" You ask as you set your phone down. Jungkook had been upset having to leave you behind this morning to do a photoshoot for Vogue magazine, but you'd both agreed to keeping your relationship under wraps and you being there for his photoshoot would've raised some eyebrows...

"Fun. I guess." He shrugs before basically crashing on top of you, making you laugh out. "Mm... I'm glad to be home though. With you..." He smiles as he snuggles into your chest, making you blush and wrap your arms around his bigger frame.

"You act like such a baby..." You tease and he smirks up at you.

"You like it." He declares playfully before pecking your lips repeatedly, making you laugh again and push him away a bit.

"Oh! I ordered us some food from that new restaurant downtown. I kind of went... overboard?" He clarifies to make sure he was using the word right, making you smile and nod. "Good. Overboard." He says sheepishly as he goes back to resting on you. You hum as you play with his hair lazily while he shuts his eyes, always fond of your affection.

"Maybe you should show it off to ARMY." You suggest. Unbeknownst to Jungkook, you'd been all over Twitter this morning and had stumbled upon a post from a fan account that basically talked about how much fans missed Jungkook's lives. You took responsibility for that, honestly. Jungkook had told you up front once that he used his lives with ARMY to feel relaxed but talking to you had become the new source of peace for him. You felt bad. It was a two-way deal, really. Jungkook and ARMY both needed each other, and you didn't feel right standing in the way of that. Even though your boyfriend would tell you that you're not.

"A live? But you're here, I don't want you feeling left out." He says and your heart melts.

"Of course I won't. I'll be watching from the other room, baby. Come on." You encourage and he hums slowly.

"Fine. But only for a bit." He nods certainly and you smile excitedly.

********************************************

"Fuck..." Jungkook breathes out between heavy pants and your eyes are glued to the screen as you watch your boyfriend show off his new trick of one arm push-ups. You blink a bit, impressed that you hadn't ran to his gym area yet to jump his bones. You've got some great self-control, that's for sure.

"More? I did so much!" He complains as he reads the comments while pushing back his messy hair and you wanna laugh. These girls knew exactly what they were doing. "I'm tired, ARMY. I ate, I worked out. And now... I must go." He says in a playfully dramatic way that makes you smile. You get up and tip toe to the gym door from where you sat on the couch.

Jungkook is in the middle of exiting out of his livestream when you tap on the door, getting his full attention instantly. He gets up and walks over as ARMY starts commenting what's going on and why he hasn't stopped streaming.

"Hey. All done?" You ask excitedly and he nods fast while smiling.

"That was fun. ARMY was funny tonight." He chuckles as you hum and move closer to him.

"And you were adorable and sexy at the same time." You smirk, causing him to chuckle bashfully. You hum and grab the edge of his shirt to pull him closer, giving him that look.

"Yeah? You liked?" He asks quietly as he grabs you by your waist, making you blush now.

"Babe... You're all sweaty..." You playfully complain, not really put off by that factor though cause you're still holding him by his shirt.

"Oh? Let me fix that." He whispers playfully before taking off his shirt eagerly, making you laugh and grab his face to kiss him sweetly.

"You're insatiable." You mutter against his lips before grabbing his hand and pulling him off towards the living room couch as he makes quick work of your shirt, making you squeal happily at how quick he threw your shirt away.

"This why you ended your live early?" You joke as you grip his toned sides and move to press your body against his, needing that contact.

"And if it is?" He whispers as he lays you on the couch, hovering over you, making you smirk excitedly.

"I'll be flattered." You taunt before wrapping your arms around his neck, pulling his head down to kiss him deeply. He kisses back, not missing a beat. Even as his hands roam your bare sides and grips your ass in both hands, making you moan softly against his lips.

"I've missed you all day..." He whispers against your mouth that was now hanging open thanks to his hands gripping your ass and rolling your hips against his bulge that was becoming more apparent through his sweatpants.

"Fuck..." You breathe out in one long and shallow breath as his mouth moves to your neck. One of his hands move from your ass to the front of your shorts, sliding in and going straight into your underwear to check you.

"Jung... Kookie..." You moan softly and grind down on to his fingers as they slide effortlessly between your folds.

"No prep needed." He teases quietly in your ear, making you moan softly in a bashful way. He was always so damn cocky. Of course, you didn't need much prep! Not when you had a tattooed, pierced, and five-foot-ten Korean biker man on top of you grabbing at your body like he knew it like the back of his hand. He pulls back to look you in the eyes.

"You missed me?" He taunts softly as he strokes his tender fingers up and down your wet slot, making you moan more, head rolling back as you roll your hips against his hand, following his movements like his fingers are a paintbrush.

"Y/N? You missed me?" He whispers again as he watches you with dark eyes. You whine a soft 'yes', making him groan. "I love your noises..." He whispers as he pulls out his hand from your shorts and sits up on his knees.

"No. No, please. More." You moan as you sit up fast and go straight for his waistband, making him lick his lips, watching you pull his sweats and boxers down in one motion. You gasp as his cock springs out.

"No prep needed..." You taunt breathlessly before kissing along his chest as your hand squeezed the length, making Jungkook groan and buck his hips slightly, wanting more.

You look up at him and bat your eyelashes, putting on your best innocent act, making him moan more. "Oh my god, you're so fucking pretty..." He breathes out in awe before pushing you back down on to the couch. He yanks your bottoms off fully, and you smile up at him as you lift your legs and hold them up and apart by your knees, putting your pussy on full display.

"Fuck, you look... Fucking amazing like that." Jungkook pants as he strokes the tip of his cock along your wet slot, watching as it gets wetter from your juices. Thank god for birth control...

"It's been so long." He whispers, eyes rolling shut at the feeling of your clit twitching against his tip. You pause at that comment.

"Baby, we hooked up last night." You giggle softly and are cut off by a long moan as your always giving boyfriend slides into you slowly.

"You didn't miss this cock?" He whispers as he watches your face while he slides in inch by inch to really make you feel it. Your eyes practically roll back.

"Yes! I missed it!" You whine quietly as you keep your legs in place, wanting him deep inside of you. Jungkook smirks as he moves to hover over you again and his arms go above your head to hold you in place as he slowly slides out of your dripping cunt, ready to thrust right back in. It makes you melt, honestly. He always knew where to hit.

"Baby..." You whine, eyes shut, lost in his strokes. They made your mind go numb. It makes him smirk as he quickens his pace a bit more.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck..." He pants repeatedly in your ear as he shoves his cock deeper inside of you. He hits your spot and you scream out, almost going limp. You didn't wanna move, not when his cock was hitting that spot.

"Oh my fucking god..." You whine out in pure pleasure, making Jungkook smirk.

"There you go baby. Don't I always hit that spot that makes you go dumb?" He taunts in your ear as the pit of your stomach starts to tighten. Your head rolls back as you cry out, unable to move from under him. His toned body had you against the couch and his arms were keeping you from jolting from his thrusts.

"You gonna cum for me? Hm?" He asks, always excited at the thought, no matter how many times you've done this. You nod fast.

"Yes! Yes! So... Close..." You whine out as your head rolls back, your hands letting go of your legs and gripping his waist, nails digging into his skin as he uses that pain as motivation to keep going.

"Who owns this pussy, baby?" He whispers in your ear as you shiver.

"Y-You! You! I-I... Have... Cum!" You cry out as you do just that as Jungkook slows down his thrusts a bit as you cream on his length.

"F-Fuck I have to... Cum." He gasps as you pull him down to kiss him passionately. He pulls out to cum on your stomach and pants heavily as he basically lays on top of you after, making you giggle sleepily.

"That... Is so good." You sigh peacefully as Jungkook holds up his fist, making you laugh at his after-sex routine. You fist bump him before laying back with your eyes closed.

"This... Is the good life..." He whispers bashfully and you smile happily. You couldn't agree more.

****************************************

"What?!" You shout in panic as Jungkook rubs his face in an upset and nervous manner. His manager was on the phone, shouting about Jungkook's live staying on and having to be turned off by them.

You're quick to get on Twitter as Jungkook apologizes to his manager for being careless. "Oh... No, no, no, no..." You panic as you see Jungkook is trending and your '@' is going around everywhere. Some fans are following you out of excitement while others are leaving messages about how they can't believe Jungkook would choose you.

Your heart drops as you see the fanbase split down the middle. Some fans defending you and some telling you to flat out kill yourself. There was a small percentage of fans shaming you as well, blaming you for 'exposing' Jungkook. Like you purposefully revealed yourself for the hell of it.

Jungkook looks over at you as you just get lost in scrolling through each and every comment. He gets up fast. "Don't." He says as he grabs your phone away, but you already feel a lump growing in your throat as you try and blink away the tears.

"You'll have to disappear for a bit on social media. Both of you, And wait for something more interesting to happen." Jungkook's manager says as he just pulls you into his arms, focusing more on comforting you. "Hello? Do you hear me? Maybe Ms. Y/L/N should just go back home. This little honeymoon is over. Now." His manager says angrily, and you pull away from your boyfriend's strong grasp.

"Talk." You whisper before walking off out of the kitchen and going into the bedroom, needing to lay down. You get in bed and slowly hide under the covers, drowning yourself in Jungkook's scent. You knew you were no one special. You knew Jungkook ran with a higher class of people who were more his 'aesthetic'. Who the hell were you compared to someone... younger, prettier, smarter, thin-

You're cut from your spiraling thoughts by a log of a body, laying gently on top of you. "Y/N..." Jungkook whispers, making you sniffle.

"Jungkook, your manager." You try quietly as the sheets are pulled off of your head.

"We... Came to an understanding." He says and you nod slowly.

"When am I leaving?" You ask, breath hitching in slight panic. All of this was too good to be true. You should've known someone like you never gets a happy ending. Not with your luck.

Jungkook frowns and strokes your cheek tenderly, wiping away a stray tear you didn't even know was there...

"You're not going anywhere, baby." He says softly and you look up at him, studying his face for any sign of that being a cruel joke. Instead, you're met with soft and bright shiny eyes looking back at you in excitement.

"But... Your manager...-" Jungkook cuts you off.

"Understands that without you here, I'll have no distraction and therefore, will just have to make their lives a living hell for entertainment. Go right back to shirtless lives and getting drunk on camera." He smirks proudly as you slowly sit up, Jungkook moving to sit between your legs.

"But... That still doesn't change that we have to go MIA for awhile..." You sigh.

"Mm... No. We don't have to do that either." He nods before showing you his phone. You see it's open to Namjoon's Instagram.

"Babe, I don't need to see you've been learking on his page..." You try with a scrunched nose.

"No, no, look." He encourages and you open up Namjoon's Instagram story and see he posted a screenshot from Jungkook's live yesterday. It's of you two with his hands on your waist and your hands on his shoulders, smiling sweetly up at him as he looks at you with this lovesick puppy dog face. The little phrase in the corner of the picture says 'Happy Day!' followed by a purple heart emoji. You smile a bit and sniffle more as you see how many people have liked it already.

"That's so sweet. But baby... Your fans hate me. They'll stop supporting you if we try and go public..." You warn quietly.

"Then they aren't really my fans, are they?" Jungkook asks, giving you a pointed look. You sigh softly at the question.

"You're right." You finally agree, voice soft as you slowly let yourself lean into him more.

"I've got you, Y/N. It's you and me. And I wouldn't want it any other way..." He says quietly as he moves to kiss your temple, making you blush.

"Let's do a live tonight. I can introduce you to ARMY. Properly this time..." He teases and you giggle and smile up at him.

"Sounds perfect." You whisper before kissing him.

[dusty-siltstrider]

Alright I'm properly boozed and decently numbed. I promised to bitch excessively on here if our boy became a name on a missing poster. Here the fuck I am.

For reference I'm focusing on Viktor and Jayce here. More than enough has been said about everyone else. Y'all ate good. Let us starve in peace. Lots of this comes from lengthy discussions on the Viktor Nation disc.

To start - no, Viktor does not appear in the new trailer. I'm sorry, he just doesn't. Not even a voice line which should have been pretty fucking easy. Over at Viktor Nation we spent nearly an hour going over the trailer frame by frame brightening shit to see if he shows. He does not. No, not even a far-off shot of his arm. We got more Viktor in the teaser from two months ago than the official trailer.

However...

100% Glorious Evolved. Fingerprints around their faces match what appears to be Viktor face-grabbing that Shimmer addict from the teaser trailer. Similar rune carvings. This is his cult. Which uhh right off the bat is much different from any other interpretations?

Basically confirms they're going all-in on runic magic for Viktor and largely veering away from classic Machine Herald. Which I have feelings about. That will be reserved for the season itself once we see it play out.

And before any smartasses come in with "lol at least you got a shot of his feet" jokes those definitely aren't his. Just one of the random cultists floating judging by the angling. And Viktor's would be full grape Fanta. The silvery/gold texture is interesting. Some kind of manipulation of metal through magic?

Don't even.

Also been seeing a lot on the shadowy golden-eyed figure and we figured that's near-certainly not him either.

Looks sick, I'll admit. I kinda hope it's him, in fact. Most likely not him. Face shape is slightly too squared off, ears stick out too far, yes I went in deep on skull shape for this and I'm at least 75% sure that ain't him. And Viktor's magical influence/Hexcore spookiness has been defined by purple sinews and more organic forms than this more fantastical shadow tendril thing. This seems to be a new force entirely.

I won't discount it outright since Viktor's eyes are indeed associated with gold/amber but for all I know this could be Mel. Eye socket shape/nose does vaguely match. And Viktor's eyes would likely lean more towards a purple voidy glow in S2 if they're going all-in on the Hex Core.

Possible Jayce cameo? Very obviously meant to be his wristband gem, maybe somehow got fused with his skin. The grip on the object appears heavy so it's not Viktor's cane/staff. Could very well be the Viktor/Jayce confrontation since if you squint there might a robed figure standing in front of that weird fuckin magic doodad.

Speaking of...

Saw a pretty interesting post from @nylloth saying this could be Viktor's "hospital" or maybe some kind of Glorious Evolved temple. It does resemble the fucked up glowing sinewy appearance of the Hex Core so perhaps some kind of hallucination or vision that Viktor is having of his potential. Would love to hear more thoughts on that though. It's very obviously related to "the Arcane" as a broader more mysterious force.

Wanted to be angrier here but I'm honestly just disappointed. Which is ass because pit fighter Vi and Ekko and revolutionary Jinx are all things I'm genuinely looking forward to but I can't rally it. I'm very glad everyone else ate good though. Does indeed look sick and I'm still excited. Pit fighter Vi especially. Holy fuck. But I'm just too bummed out about Viktor, call that dramatic or childish but idc it's how it is.

Be stingy about appearances and character designs but it could not have been difficult to include a single voice line. Don't even bother including it in the show, get a couple trailer-only lines or a "Glorious Evolution" or SOMETHING. Don't give me that "well their fates are still ambiguous" No they aren't lmao they just aren't. By this point everyone knows Jayce and Vik live and 50/50 on Mel.

If Viktor had not appeared in that teaser TWO MONTHS ago for like 2 seconds then it would be reasonable to assume he got erased from the show entirely lol. We have a shot of his arm to go off of until we hopefully get a proper Viktor poster. Cool. Nice arm.

That is all. For now. Please refrain from discussing leaks. I don't need any more temptation.

[strangeswift]

It's different here. And I don't even have to stop and ask myself if it's a good different or a bad different. There's nothing good about it. I don't bike to school, Nancy drives me now. Lucas has basketball practice in the mornings, so he doesn’t meet us out front. I know that. I know he has practice, so I don't stand there like an idiot looking around for him. I still look for you. I still look for Jonathan's car, or your mom's.

I miss you. I miss you in the most pathetic, childish way possible. I miss Eleven, but it's different. Like I can live without her. Maybe that's wrong. Or maybe what's wrong is the way I can't even function without you.

Do you remember when we were thirteen, and my mom tried to make me give away a bunch of toys, because I kept getting in trouble at school? And I didn't pick out two boxes full like she said to, so when we were at school she did it for me. And she gave away Rory. And do you remember how I cried, Will? You and I walked into my room after school, and I saw that the toys were gone, so I started tearing shit apart looking for that stupid fucking toy, and it wasn't there. And I started crying. Thirteen years old and crying over a toy. I was so fucking embarrassed, but you told me it was okay, you said that you understood.

Every day I wake up, and I remember you're not here, and I feel that same panic. I feel like tearing apart my fucking room to look for you, because there's no way you're not here. I feel like biking over to your old house, pounding on the door. There are strangers there now.

I try not to let myself cry about it. Because you're not here to tell me not to be embarrassed about it. God, I don't want to think about what you'd say if you saw me crying over you. You'd be nice about it. But what would you think of me, really?

I don't feel the way I'm supposed to feel about you. I don't feel the way a normal guy feels about his best friend. I don't even feel this way about El. And I can't think about it for too long because I know what it fucking means, and how fucking ironic is that? All the names Troy called you, your fucking dad and his bullshit, and all this time it was me who was the fucking freak. It would probably be a slap in the face, if you found out, huh? They should've been picking on me. I would've taken it, if it meant they left you alone.

I'm sorry. For everything. I really fucked it all up. I don't think I can fix it. I don't know if I should, if I feel this way. Maybe the distance is better. People grow apart. You're gonna be okay. Maybe you'll be better off. That's what matters. That's all that matters. I've never been okay in my fucking life, and I'm honestly done trying. It's exhausting. But you deserve it, Will. You deserve to be happy. I hope you are.

I'm never going to send this fucking letter. I never was. So, for what it's worth, I love you, Will. Sorry.

[ilikekidsshows]

Call me a childish hater but I'm glad the Hack-San Ladynoir ending got obliterated into pieces. It already felt degrading and hollow back then with how Adrien's worry for Ladybug's life is not not addressed to give Marinette a free pass for throwing the worst possible situation in Chat's face (someone else suddenly having her earrings which he understandably took as Scarabella being a Sentimonster and Hawkmoth possibly having found Ladybug). That episode said so much more about Marinette's absolut lack of care for Chat as a person than about Adrien being "needy". At least he deeply cared for her safety, can't say that about Marinette apparently)

And I also hate how Marinette is using the term 'sulking' to describe her own feelings if she were in Chat's position. It's such a childish and degrading word to use here. That episode already killed most arguments that Marinette thinks about Chat's safety beyond how she plays into it (with Kuro Neko for example killing the rest. Gurl seriously thought Chat's akumatized as a civilian for a while and didn't even consider it BAD that Hawkmoth knows his identity, which she disregarded again in Elation), but I simply HATE that Adrien was made to attack Scarabella because he clearly thought about the realistic worst cases

And yet the end of the episode has Marinette use childish terms and not even once push back on Chat basically telling her that he's irrelevant. She took care of what's important and that doesn't include him. She's perfectly fine with him thinking that because obviously she considers his hurt feelings as unprofessional neediness that came from their 'special bond' and not because he was still left to believe that he's supposed to care for her safety in their duo and that Ladybug would do the same (which the show has shown over and over again, she literally wouldn't. She barely remembers that Chat is a real person and the show plays it straight)

I hate that the episode had Adrien initially REACT in a way that honors the bond Ladynoir was once supposed to have (meaning, seeing a new holder with the other one's miraculous as a red alert situation) just to be girlbossed into oblivion by the two leaders on top of the hierarchy who clearly don't consider him in anything.

That is such an awful way to morally approach this as show. Adrien was the only one of the three of them who treated the situation with the right seriousness and he got punished for it by being treated as a pet and needy child to the two treat Ladybug's above him.

It says honestly so much more about Marinette and Alya than Adrien.

Marinette viewing Chat's problem as some unprofessional neediness is also highlighted by her not even humoring the question of if he too may need a person to confine in. All she say sis that she would have sulked if she had found out like this that he revealed himself to someone else, but she does not care to ask of he needs anyone. For. Her it's a ridiculous thought apparently that Chat could need something.

Or have valid feelings that go beyond unprofessional hurt feelings because "their bond is so special uwu". How special can it be if Marinette at no point can be made to give a shit about the person underneath his mask? When she immediately ditched him after being told "no" once in Kwamis choice?

How special can it be when Marinette over and over and over again degrades anything Chat feels as childish pettiness and sulking that need to be fixed by him catering to her more?

I don't care what anyone says, Adrien was right in leaving in Kwamis Choice. Very obviously he had to learn ever since Hack-San that Ladybug is a person he needs to be able to live without because this girl is the most unreliable partner anyone could be stuck with. My hope is that Lila will have a blast with the broken pieces that is Ladynoir. I don't even want them to break up forever to punish Marinette or some nonsense, I just want the show to fucking DEAL with this horrible morality that is Marinette's absolut disregard of Chat being a real person.

---

This tendency is extra annoying when as early as the New York Special we saw Adrien’s despair over killing someone be sidelined with Marinette lying on the ground, sobbing about how Adrien went back to Paris instead of spending a school trip with her, the epitome of having petty “me problems”. Cat Noir giving up his ring is just pushed aside with a "he made his choice", because why would Marinette care about her loyal superhero partner who was just seriously traumatized when she can cry about Adrien going home from a trip early instead? Adrien having any feelings on actually important stuff is just him “sulking”, but Marinette can throw herself a pathetic pity party about how she can’t see Adrien for a few days and we’re supposed to treat it like she’s lost everyone who ever cared about her.

But, sure, Adrien is the one being emotional and needy, while our feminist icon “girl power” protagonist cries and throws up because she has to be a day without her crush. At this point, Adrien could have a hole in his torso, and the show would still treat him as an ungrateful whiner, while Marinette getting “Queen Bee” in a Miraculous hero personality quiz would be treated like the world was ending. It doesn’t matter whether or not someone is dead, has had their secret identity discovered or has been replaced by a Sentimonster. What actually matters is whatever petty shit Marinette is worried about today, which is usually the same petty shit she’s worried about every day, just for the record.

This is Marinette being sad that she failed to tell the boy she will see in school a few days later that she loves him, like she fails to do every day of the week. But this is treated as the emotional lowest point of the movie, with more pathos than anything else this entire show has gotten even after the fact, because she’s crying in the rain about it this time. Clearly Marinette has more important things to worry about than Adrien does and this isn’t all just emotional manipulation on the part of the writers! Her love life is being slightly inconvenienced! We're supposed to take this shit seriously!

Like, while Marinette is lying on the ground, in the rain, crying after failing to do something she will be able to try again in a few days at the most, Adrien is dealing with having (temporarily) killed someone and his abusive father being in a Mood(™). Cat Noir is missing in action. Soon after we see Hawk Moth is gonna try to cause a nuclear apocalypse, which ends up being treated as normal superhero hijinks. The special treats all of this obviously more pressing stuff as unimportant, because it’s not about Marinette's love life and god forbid this show be about anything other than Marinette for five minutes.

Like, when I first saw the NY Special, I said she deserved to lose Cat Noir as a partner. I only meant that in a “This was caused by her own actions and Marinette should learn a lesson from this” kind of way back then. Now, though? Getting away from Marinette is for Adrien’s own good, and I hate that being concerned for Adrien now translates to “wanting Marinette to be punished”, all because Marinette has been turned into such a toxic, needy, clingy person that she will be in emotional agony if anyone around her takes distance from her to take care of their own needs first instead of solely catering to hers.

In a narrative that treats Marinette’s smallest inconvenience as more important than the well-being of any other character, of course the idea that Marinette herself could ever be in any real peril is inconceivable. The writers would never let anything happen to her, so Cat Noir is just stupid for worrying about her well-being, he should just be aware of the meta narrative, I guess. No one could ever defeat Ladybug, which is why the writers’ commentary claims Marinette won in the S5 finale, so the only thing to actually be worried about is whether or not she gets to have her boytoy of choice. Actual peril doesn’t exist in the larger narrative of Miraculous, outside of vague hypotheticals that will never come to pass, because the biggest worry of the entire universe is to make sure Marinette isn’t upsette.

[tadpoles-and-daydreams]

Hey there! Hekate has pointed me toward your blog and I just wanted to say hi 💞

I do have a question though, have you ever had deities help you with motivation and executive functioning skills? I've got ADHD and the "laziness"(🤢) or what I call "going slug mode" (staying in bed all day, no motivation to shower, etc) really commands my life.

My periods of deity work tend to coincide with my periods of productivity and energy, but I often fall off when, well, everything else falls off. So I guess I'm also looking for advice or at least to connect with someone who's had similar experiences.

(I've also connected with Aphrodite and Loki! Other gods I've worked with in the past are Mother Hathor and Brigid)

First off, I may or may not have had so many feelings upon seeing "Hekate has pointed me towards your blog" because the idea that my blog can be useful enough that a deity would go "go look at what that dude has to say" just brings me so much joy.

Second off, OH THIS IS ABSOLUTELY SOMETHING I SHOULD SCREAM ABOUT THANK YOU. I can't believe I haven't already made a post about this!!

I, too, am an ADHD motherfucker and I have always had so many issues with keeping up with my craft. I will absolutely be calling it "slug mode" from now on, that's the best fucking way to put it. I've had deities help me with executive function at times, but if I'm honest I've forgotten lately that I can ask them for help with that. More often than not it looks more like nudging me towards a task than giving me the energy- but that doesn't mean you can't ask! It just means I forgot I could, lol.

This is gonna be a chonker post, so I'm breaking this post up into two parts; 1, why accepting "falling off" was the best thing I could have done for myself and 2, how to still connect with your craft (and deities) through those times anyway.

So for one, you're not broken or a failure, and your deities fuckin' love you.

Call me philosophical, but hear me out; I've always worked in cycles. Cycles of insane productivity, cycles of tiredness, cycles of hyperfixation on one thing, then another, then another. I'm just someone who works that way, and I've always viewed it as a problem to be fixed. I've always viewed MYSELF as a problem to be fixed, which really started with the school system but that's an unrelated rant. So, apologies for getting a bit intense especially since this may not apply to you personally, but just in case:

You're not a problem. You don't need to fix yourself. The world works in cycles. Seasons, reincarnation if you subscribe to that belief, the water cycle, and a billion other things I've forgotten- working with cycles is just a natural way of going about life that I think shouldn't be forgotten. I have intense periods of growth in my craft, and I have periods where I don't do much and instead play my favorite video game for eight hours straight- and that's okay! One of the best things I did for myself and my craft was give myself permission to do that. I, and you, are not failures as witches for "falling off" and our deities love us anyway. Not in spite of it, either, because of it. They know how to work with the cyclic nature of things; people are no different.

So honestly, there's a chance that none of this will make sense to you- but there's a chance that you, and maybe others seeing this post, might find that giving yourself permission to go through cycles might be the best thing you could do.

Okay, now that I've yelled about that, here's ways that I keep myself connected to my craft and my deities during my less witchy periods.

I give myself permission to use witchcraft for "dumb shit." I have at least one post on this, but witchcraft can BE childish, playful, "dumb-" it doesn't need to be serious all the time. So I'm learning to let go of what I think it should look like and recognize that sometimes the way to stay connected is to lay in bed and draw a sigil on my phone as a mini-spell to manifest a nice little treat or a thing I want in a video game.

This isn't deity work, but it had been huge for me: SIGILS. Sigils my beloved. I don't often have the time, energy, or supplies to do what most people think of when they talk about spells. So instead, if I'm feeling like I could do a spell for something but that's just too much, sigils can be done on my phone or computer while just chilling. Also, if you're like me and a writer, I just write spells too. Literally the same way I write statements for sigils, but a bunch of 'em.

Personally I just talk to my deities. I would like to do this more, actually. You don't need to have a big reason for calling them in, just ask them to sit with you and talk about your day or infodump about a special interest. They're not going to deem it unimportant; you're important to them.

Turn anything into a devotional activity if you want. Any self-care. Not just the typical stuff; I mean food, meds, literally any sort of "maintenance" to keep your body and mind running! If you can't do those, play music you associate with them, or watch a show/play a game and invite them to just sit with you. Whatever you're already doing, you can just ask them to do it with you. If that's literally just laying in bed doing nothing but feeling crappy, I can assure you I've asked them to sit with me during those days too and they've been more than happy.

Literally most of my offerings are just random food. As we speak, I have a little tiny thing with a few sips of soda because I give Loki some when I drink some. If you don't have the time or energy to put it on the altar, literally just drink it with the intention that you're drinking it "for" them. When I did a reading and Kali visited for it, she asked for a graham cracker of all things. It doesn't have to be associated with them. Virtual offerings too! If you can, I've seen people just scroll through pinterest/google images and pick images to offer to their deities.

This might not be something you struggle with, but this is definitely something I would need someone to tell me so: ASK. PLEASE. ASK FOR THINGS. They're not going to riot if you ask for things!! Let them help!! Ask for things, unapologetically if you can muster it!!! I am using excessive exclamation marks for a reason, I swear. My deities are in a constant state of telling me to just ask for things.

Be gentle with yourself. Genuinely, I think one of the best ways to honor your deities doesn't even require them to be there at all; just try not to hate on yourself for being the way you are, because they wouldn't want you to.

Overall, my only advice is just... throw away what you "should" be doing and find out what you LIKE doing. What works for you? It's a hard question to answer, but it gets a lot easier when you start looking away from what "should" work. Your deities are working with you, they wouldn't be working with you if they didn't accept every single part of you. That includes slug mode.

As always, my DM's and asks are open if you have any more questions/just want to connect because being a neurodivergent witch sometimes just feels isolating at times! If you actually read this whole post thank you, I hope some of it helped!!

[never-forget-viva-la-pluto]

To the SPN fans that are hating on good omens rn bc of the leak, I hope you choke. I've seen some really nasty shit today from some of my (now unfollowed) followers whom I followed for spn content. So let's make one thing clear from actual posts ive seen today:

-Saying that the "wrong angels kissed", is...homophobic. I was with destiel from beginning to end and yeah we were completely shafted, but it's not okay to then say that other gay couples in media aren't allowed to kiss just because they aren't the ones you thought were hot. Jesus christ didn't think I needed to write that one down for ya-bo burnham

-I saw so much fatphobia about how Castiel deserved a kiss more than Aziraphel bc "he has far more sex appeal." Wtf wtf wtf. How do you live with yourselves saying that shit?You can pry Micheal Sheens body type Aziraphel out of my cold dead hands, you CW brainwashed morons!

-hate against the author for some reason, no one is willing to give specifics about it, but I think the majority of them maintain that GO is not good rep because they didn't kiss and now they are claiming pandering or something? Honestly that guy has only ever stood with the writers guild and queer people his whole career from what I find so I don't think it's fair whatever hate they are spouting. He isnt even saying he is upset with fans that saw or shared the video. Hes being super nice about it!

-I will say, non of us SPN fans have a fucking leg to stand on when it comes to hating something bc of the authors, OK. I saw someone saying the writing for spn was better and I can say you did not watch the show. I loved spn but don't do the late Terry Pratchett like this. He did nothing wrong

-on that same ish strain, as an ace person who thrives off queerplatonic relationships in media, maybe they kiss, I dunno. I just have to wait until the season comes out. Not 1 SPN fan gets to bitch about GO asexualty rep when SPN never even tried that route with any of its characters. But also ace characters are allowed to kiss, so you can write them that way of you want and interpret them that way if you want still. This is your viewing experience.

-this leak is truly not the same as the SPN yo a ti leak, solely bc the episode hasn't aired yet. "None of you GO fans would have survived the yo a ti leak." No I think you wouldn't bc the spn leak was clinging to an already mangled straw, while the angel's in GO are queer already. Queer queer queer and no amount of kissing or lack thereof is going to change that. We have no idea what happens in that episode of GO, but we saw the creators butcher the only moment in the show that could have meant anything real for queer viewers in SPN.

-"SPN crowly was kissing dudes first so this one is not that impressive". I see two cakes. One was made with the intent to make gay people look evil, but over time got kinda funny and a little better bc gay people liked it, and the other was about telling an interesting story about how love is so important, especially at the end of the world, and gay people liked that one too! So for me it's YaY two cakes!

-again the anti aziraphel is so plainly just fatphobia. You have no excuses. Sorry you don't think someone who looks like a slightly chubby micheal sheen could ever get kissed by someone who looks like David tennant, but you are not only wrong, you are also childish.

OK I'm done. Go watch good omens s2 when it comes out for my fucking sanity please. Or don't if all you are going to do is try to rip it apart like you do to all media that tries to be better.

[0nyxvesper]

OBEY ME REDESIGN/AU? KINDA?Just read pls😭

Art -> Part 1 -SATAN- (art at the end)

Hey! My name's Onyx and I'm a artist, which gives me incredible powers of creation that I use to make or redesign silly characters instead of focusing on my already existing art projects or simply my overall future : what a life.

So as the title says, I'm redesigning some of the om! characters as well as changing up the world they live in. As for the first redesign I chose (very self indulged choice ) to start with Satan :)

This isn't really an AU but just me ''fixing'' (changing) things that I (emphasis on the I, this is MY opinion, you don't have to agree with me) dislike about the game's world and/or characters. I also added things that were, yes, absolutely unnecessary, but so fucking cool 😎

Btw english isn't my first language so if something doesn't make sense just pretend it does, thanks :)

START OF MY RAMBLING

So, in my vision of obey me, all demons have access to magic (curses, hexes, potions...) but some demons also have a connection with one to two elemental powers (water, fire, wind...)

The ''regular'' magic as well as basic knowledge of the devildom fonctionnement and history is taught to young demons (just born/reborn demons and fallen angels *wink wonk) at RAD (which explain why the heck some litteral ADULTS that could easily have a balanced working life are still in an HIGH SCHOOL environment.) (I know that adults can go to school, no problem with that lmao, but lucifer or satan in the og! game for example have nothing to learn there anymore and could be having a ''regular'' active life like-)

But yes, the academy's objective isn't really to ''tame'' demons, because they can't change their very nature and the idea that a demon (Diavolo) is working on turning other demons into more ''human'' beings seems really fucking off to me

And the human exchange program was supposed to be more of a ''exchange of culture'' kind of things where humans would learn about demon's ways and vice versa, it wasn't as diplomatic as it was in the game. See it as these ''special week'' thingy in school we're you'd learn about other cultures and try different country's dishes everyday. Exept it's for a full year. And in hell.

ALRIGHT THANKS FOR TAKING THE TIME TO READ YOU'RE SO SWEET ILYSM :))))

here's the part that you probably wanted the most : THE DRAWINGS x) (hope it not too pixelated 🗿)

ABOUT THIS REDESIGN

Soooo my Satan is connected to earth and shadows and is an expert in curses and potions as well as devildom's history which is one of his favorite subjects along with the optional Art and litterature classes. (there's multiple optional classes that are supposed to help students that can't keep up or have bad grades to balance their grades by just showing up and listening, for exemple, mammon sometimes goes to the optional business and trading classes. )

In the og! game, satan is supposed to be lucifer's opposite, but I felt like it was mostly showed with his design and wanted to make it go a little further by making them dress in a more androgynous way and changing a bit his personality, making him a bit more carefree. (he's still super self conscious about his dangerous changes of temper which makes him a very closed and silent person, he's also still introverted, but when I say carefree I mean that he often skips classes to go check on cats or go read, and that they don't feel obligated to fulfill a role of exemple as a head student or avatar of wrath like lucifer does) I honestly just wanted the opposition between these two to be more marked but not necessarily have this ''competition'' between them because it felt very childish.

As for the elephant in the room, yes, he has hooves, no, there's no other reason than the fact that he doesn't have an animal theme like all of the others have. Yes, I only chose it because I find it cute. No, you may not pet them. Oh and as for the ''but why do they show up, aren't they supposed to have a human form'' I just decided that being gifted at everything is unrealistic, so I officially declare that Satan SUCKS AHH at maintaining his human form. He's not helped by the fact that he's constantly concentrating on staying calm and having a neutral facade and would saturate if they also had to concentrate on his physical form. But yeah he's still bad at it.

Alrighty thats it for today :)

Much love !

[eithielk]

Modern!Zuko x Reader

Summary: Your best friend's brother is quite annoying, but it's okay cause hes cute

You and Azula had been friends for a while, only knowing little about her family, you thought she only had one sibling, Kiyi. But as her brother returns after 3 years of being away, you are left completely shocked.

Azula invited you to her house over the weekends, her excuse? She deserved it, of course, why should she need a reason

You've been her friend for over 3 years or so, you met with her friends around 9th grade, and ever since, you four have been inseparable.

Despite being friends for so long, you didn't know much about her family, only that her mother, wasnt really in the picture.

Also the fact that she had one other sibling. Kiyi.

She was so nice, and honestly a polar opposite of Azula. You thought Kiyi was her one and only sibling— or so you thought.

"We can watch that stupid show Ty lee has been gushing about and–"

Zuko sat on the couch and looked at the group, feeling awkward as they stared back at him.

Giving it a few more seconds before he spoke up, "Azula, you didn't tell me you had guests."

"Why should I tell you"

Earning a groan from the boy, who looked at you briefly before standing up and leaving.

"Dont mind him Y/N, hes always grumpy" Ty lee assured me, but that wasnt really what I was thinking right now.

"You have a brother?"

"Yeah, didnt I mention it" she replied too casually.

"No? Not really.." OF COURSE NOT WOMAN, you mentally cursed yourself, but knowing Azula, it was best not to cause such a scene

"I dont think its much of an issue, hes not really relevant."

"Hes also off limits" Ty lee jumped in, making sure to nudge on Mai's arm.

This action didnt go unnoticed by Azula, who then proceeded to recall childhood memories of them.

"Oh yeah, Mai's got a huge crush on him" she laughed, "Frankly I don't see the appeal."

"Remember when we were young and we had Zuko push her in the water" Ty lee jumped in.

"He didnt push me, you guys made him do that" Mai retorted in defence, a faint blush appearing on her face

"How it happened isn't important, you two looked so silly" Azula laughed.

Later that evening the four of you decided on a game of truth or dare, childish but a classic.

"Y/N, truth or dare."

"Dare duh!"

"I dare you to scare my brother" Azula replied almost too quickly, like she already knew what my choice was.

As you tiptoed across the house, going downstairs to find Zuko on the couch.

Crawling behind the chair, you waited for a moment to strike when–

"What are you doing"

A voice crept behind me as I turned to see Zuko hovering over me

"What– Ouch, the fuck?" You landed on your butt, wincing at the pain you didnt notice Zuko offer his hand to you

"Why are you hiding behind the couch?"

"Its a dare okay, I was suppose to scare you."

"It'll take more than that to scare me" Zuko replied laughing.

I took his arm and stood up, still recovering from that embarrassingly low fall.

"Did Azula put you up for this?"

"Maybe, why?"

Zuko scoffed crossing his arms, "Why are you even friends with her in the first place"

"Why are you so curious in the first place? Hm?"

"You know what– why did I even bother" he groaned about to turn walk away.

"Wait– Im sorry, I didnt mean to come off as rude, Im just curious you know."

"Right.. well whatever, moments passed go back to your friends now." Zuko waved his hand as he turned around

Jerk.

When it was time to go to sleep, everyone drifted off slowly, while you lied there, awake.

It was harder for you to fall asleep, especially since you had trouble sleeping in new places.

Deciding to go downstairs to grab yourself something to drink, opting for a glass of milk.

Turning your head, you meet with Zukos eyes staring back at you.

"I– fuck sorry, I didnt see you." I grab my chest, feeling scared by his sudden appearance.

Zuko nodded and moved past me

Feeling a bit awkward in you two standing in silence, you tried to break it.

You cleared your throat, "Sorry about earlier.. again... Azula didn't tell me she had a brother.."

"Figures, she just acts like I dont exist."

"Can I ask why?"

"Cant you just finish your milk?"

His comment made me roll my eyes, "You're her brother alright." I retort back quietly.

"What was that?"

"Nothing"

Your response was met with a glare, he definitely heard that.

[anonymous-eggy]

your leander analysis was soooo spot on !! it's the first one that made sense to me !! i was always like ?? why would he try to mess with you ?? it just didn't make sense to me ?? you're so big brain

exactlyyyy!

i think my point didnt really get across because i said it in a very dramatic manner, but the point is there.

at the end of the day, Leander wants to manipulate you into trusting him. for what reason? we don't know yet. To take down the senobium? for selfish reasons? both?

no matter the reason, he's cunning and manipulative. he's not prone to outbursts and immediate revenge from what we've seen in the demo. he didn't become the trusted and adored leader of a huge gang by having childish outbursts and taking his frustration out on others for not trusting him or not wanting to be around him. he's like a wolf. he will play the long game if he really has to. if it becomes a game of stamina, he'll keep chasing you until you dont want to or cant run anywhere but into his arms. into his maw of fangs that he's conditioned you to believe is home so he can finally snap his jaw shut on you.

He is the safehouse, the leader. everyone follows him eventually. he just likes to make you feel like it was your choice all along and not something he was steering you towards since the very beginning.

this is literally what makes him such an attractive character. we know in the back of our minds (whether or not we realize it) that this is what he's doing. its so bad, but it so good at the same time. he has secrets and depth to his character and we want to know them.

honestly, if anything, he grabbed mc's hand when they choose to hesitate out of desperation to prove he can handle it and gain that huge leap of trust in Mc.

which caused mc a moment of panic and surprise, thus causing their curse to flare up. the same way i assume mhin's curse would flare up to protect them. this flare up was more than what leander had planned for, so he has a moment where he has to bat away the curse with whatever stupid powerful magic he's gotten ahold of.

once again, he wants you to trust him. this is obviously a bad situation where there's only two believable and sucky ways to play it off. the truth, or a prank. so he has to pick the lesser of two bad choices and play it off like he was just messing around. like it was just jokes and everything was fine all along!!! i think theres a small crack in his facade when he says something along the lines of Mc's curse being some serious stuff he's never seen before. this is a true statement buried in false ones. its easy to breeze over. he's successfully fooled you and won if he can get you to believe he was genuinely just fucking with you.

but yeah, sure Mc could have gotten pissed with him, but isnt a moment of Mc being pissed at a joke better than them not trusting him with their curse? the trust broken from a prank is MUCH easier to repair than trust broken from a curse that almost slipped through his magical protections.

Leander wants Mc alive, safe, and trusting him COMPLETELY. He (i assume unknowingly) hints at this anytime he talks about how he shouldn't have let you leave his side. he is that one "the illusion of choice" meme.

My ending statement will be this: i am OBSESSED with characters that have a true personality hidden under a different one. the little phrases that slip out and give insight into the truth are my JAM. characters that dangle a shiny charming personality like an angler fish. maybe its because of my trauma, but we dont have to talk about that.

[writting-stuff-sometimes]

Fake it till you make it - Charles x fem reader

AN: After all the posts about Charles and A from this weekend, I got this idea. Honestly, I just care about that situation because I'm nosey but don't have any real interest in it, just wanted to write this idea that popped into my head. I have no idea how tennis and sponsorships work, clearly. I lost the first draft which I liked better so I might edit this one if I remember details I missed.

Warnings: Mean social media, a bad word here and there.

Synopsis: Y/n is a talented tennis player, but has a reputation of being a party animal and that scares sponsors away, so if she wants to attend Wimbledon she's going to have to fake a relationship with a recently single golden boy.

____________________________________

"You guys need to stop the bullshit and make this shit work" You always thought of this situation as a stupid game, but seeing Loraine's forehead vein about to burst reminded you that there was a lot on the line.

"But..." Charles was about to say something, from the redness on his face you knew he was as mad as the PR agent scolding you.

"No buts Charles, this is something to help you both, you knew what you were signing in to and you agreed to do this, we have 8 more months and we need this to work, so after today all I'm asking is for you to do what you're requested and stop being childish, agreed?"

You wanted to say no, maybe Charles had agreed to do this damn PR game but you were forced into it and found it stupid and insulting from your team to think that you needed to fake a relationship with some posh "athlete" to improve your image.

"I'm sorry Lor, but this is useless, we have nothing in common, ok? He drives in circles, how am I supposed to show interest in something I don't give two shits about?"

"Well, you're going to have to find a way if you want Puma to sponsor you, they're very concerned about the number of pictures of you partying and fooling around with guys all over the internet"

"They're my friends and I'm 25, they should care about what I do inside the court and not in my free time"

"And I wish I could spend the rest of my days enjoying the sun on a Spanish beach drinking margaritas but we can't all have what we want, can we?"

You were about to speak again when your "boyfriend" stood up swearing under his breath.

"Fine, whatever" he said before slamming the conference room door behind him.

Loraine let herself fall on the chair in front of you holding the bridge of her nose, it had been a long day and she was sick of it.

"Please, y/n, I wish I didn't have to do this either, but if you want to attend Wimbledon next year you're going to have to do this" She had been your pr agent for a little over a year now, and you had become friends, but this situation was idiotic.

"I just don't get it, why we couldn't do it with one of my friends? It would've been easier, at least they care about me, this guy couldn't care less, yesterday when we rode together to the track he said two words to me, "the seatbelt" and then complete silence the whole fucking ride"

"Yeah, well, the day he tried to invite you to train together you rejected him saying you were a real athlete and you didn't need him to get in the way of actual training"

You bit your cheek at the memory, in your defense, you were pretty hungover that morning and couldn't be bothered with this pr shit.

"Please?" Loraine looked at you with pleading eyes.

"Ugh, I'll try but I'm still not ok with this"

"I know, it's just until Wimbledon, you win that and this is all done"

"I don't like you right now" You stood up and walked to Charle's driver's room.

"Why should I be suffering when I'm not the one behaving like a toddler in a sugar rush?" Charles's voice made you stop as you were about to knock on his door.

"They want you to focus on your performance after the breakup"

"And me dating some brat is going to help? We need better strategies and upgrades"

"I know, and that's the team's job, but right now we just need you to focus on driving and try to convince the media that you're happily in love"

"It's going to be easier to win a fucking race in a tractor than look in love with her"

You weren't attracted to him and had no interest in having an actual relationship with the driver but his words felt like a cold punch to your chest, you couldn't be that bad, could you? You didn't want to hear any more of his rant and knocked on his door taking a deep breath trying to pretend you hadn't heard a thing.

"Come in" his dry voice made your skin crawl.

"Hi, can we talk?" His features softened, he feared you had heard him.

"I'll meet you in the garage" Andrea stood up and gave you a smile when he walked past you.

"Please" Charles stood up signaling for you to take a seat on the small sofa he had been sitting on.

"I think there's no way out of this"

"Seems like it" He leaned against the door in front of you.

"Look, I can't promise I won't say mean things, that's kind of my thing, but I will try to be nicer so we can make this work, ok?"

"I know I haven't been the best either and I'm so sorry about my behavior yesterday, I will try to do my best too"

"Sounds like a plan" You tried to give him an honest smile that probably looked more creepy than friendly but you were trying.

From that day on you two kept your word, you started easy and training seemed to be the one thing you had in common. But your gym selfies with Charles "accidentally" in the back didn't seem to convince the media your relationship was real, so you took it up a notch and started having date nights, he took you to his favorite restaurants in Monaco and the different cities during the GP's, and you tried to teach him how to cook, always uploading "candid" pics where your stuff and his were visible in the back this new plan seemed to be working little by little.

It was "date night" at your place and you were sitting on your couch scrolling through TikTok waiting on Charles when another "Charles and Y/n" edit popped up, you would usually scroll past them since you had no interest in what people had to say, if Loraine was happy it meant everything was good, but for some reason you let it play, photos of you and him musicalized with some taylor swift song playing in the back, they were mostly pictures of the beginning of the "relationship", you walking a couple steps away from him, sitting all alone inside the garage or the Ferrari hospitality and some others of you and Charles with a sour face on the way in and out the track, this pictures where surrounded by mean texts, and as if it wasn't enough, you clicked on the comments, they were even worse than the one lines, half of them claiming this was fake, the other half saying how ugly, boring, tacky and unworthy of him you seemed to be and juts a couple of them supporting the relationship.

A knock on the door startled you, you turned to look at the door as a pretty loaded Charles entered the apartment, you had given him a spare key to your place since him having to wait downstairs for you didn't seem very couple-like.

"Hi! Are you ready for the best fake date...what's wrong?" he asked worried when he saw the pained look on your face.

"Um, nothing, hi, you're early" He left the grocery bags on the kitchen counter and walked towards the sofa.

"What happened?" he asked steadily.

"Nothing, I'm fine"

"Let me see" he placed his hand in front of you and you immediately understood what he meant.

"Charles..."

"Please" If you had learned something from him this last couple of months was that he was stubborn as fuck and fighting him was pointless, so you ended up unlocking your phone and passing it to him. He looked at the screen and immediately a disgusted look covered his face.

"Why are you watching this?"

"I don't know, I usually don't but... I don't know"

"You know they're just talking out of anger and jealousy, right?"

"Well, you were on their side a couple of months ago, remember?"

"I've apologized about that, I was a dick"

"I know, and I know it's dumb that stupid comments affect me that much, I might be hormonal or something"

"Y/n, look" He threw the phone to the side and squatted in front of you taking your hands in his "This might be a fake relationship but I do care about you, and I don't want you to ever feel bad about what people say online, I'm willing to do whatever it takes to make this work, but you need to promise me that you won't let this kind of people get to you, I won't keep with this if what my fans say hurts you, it's not worth it."

You felt your eyes start watering and you swallowed the knot that had formed in your throat before answering him.

"Ok, I promise" you said in a low whisper.

"Good" He let go of your hands, he stood up pulling you up with him to hug you hard against his chest. "Don't let them hurt you" he said against your hair and then kissed your forehead. "Let's go, we have pasta to make"

He pulled you to the kitchen and started arranging all the ingredients.

"Instagram time" he said as he set his phone against a vase and took a picture of you for his social media.

CharlesLeclerc and Y/Naccount You are the best thing that's ever been mine. #datenight #imagreatchef #pastacrocante

LeclercLover I still don't buy his, worst PR stunt ever

16LoverCha I knew he was a Swifty!!!

CharlesandY/nluv Stop being jealous bitches and let them be happy.

ForzafFerrari I'm sorry but she seems dull and boring, what are you doing with her Baby?

You knew this post would let all hell loose for several hours so you turned off your phones and enjoyed the night together,

"It's getting late and we have an early flight tomorrow" he said taking the last sip of wine from his glass and picking up your empty plates.

"You know you can stay, right?"

"Are you sure?"

"Of course, plus, I got new sheets for the guest room"

"Ooohh, fancy"

You helped him with the dishes and then went to show him his room, he had never stayed the night, normally he would sneak out of your apartment and you would do the same when you went to his, but after the amazing night you have had, him staying seemed like a good way to finish it off.

"Here, need anything else?" You said leaving a towel on the bed.

"All good"

"Thanks" you hugged him and he hugged you back.

"No problem, don't ever let them make you feel bad"

"I won't" He kissed your head and you went to your room.

The next day you landed in Suzuka and it felt as if you had shifted realities, the fans were being nicer and more respectful, and some of them even brought gifts for you, maybe the plan was finally working.

The remaining months went by easily, and you and Charles developed a nice friendship.

"How do you feel?" Charles asked from the little bench inside your locker room.

"I'm shitting myself" Your statement made him laugh, he had become a big fan of your bluntness.

"You're going to be amazing, I know" he stood up and hugged you.

"Hello, am I interrupting?" Pierre peeked through the door, a white rose in his hand.

"Baby! you made it" You rushed to the door and hugged the French driver.

"Of course love, how could I miss it" He handed you the rose and took your face to kiss your lips softly.

"Hey! She's still my girlfriend!"

"Sorry mate, couldn't help it"

A month or two after the scolding session with Loraine you started hanging out with Charle's friends and he started hanging out with yours, one of those days you met his best friend Pierre, and you hit it off right away, it was crazy how perfect you were for each other. You knew it was going to be madness the moment you broke it off with Charles and announced your relationship with Pierre, but you couldn't care less, by then you would have had win Wimbledon and shown how talented you were, so who cares what the media and the fans thought.

"Y/n, you have one minute" your trainer said from outside the locker room.

"You can do it" Pierre kissed you softly

"Thanks, baby" You kissed his nose and turned to look at Charles

"Go kick some ass" he hugged you and kissed your hair.

"Thanks, boyfriend,. See you on the other side" You took your bag and rushed to the court, ready to be done with all this nonsense.

As always, feedback it's appreciated, and let me know if you want to be added to the tag list :)

Tag List: @wtrmlnsgr94, @ricsaigaslec

[mrsgravity]

jealous (TAA)

Note : Jude in this story is in Liverpool because I can't get over the idea that he's not coming to Liverpool and that makes me (💔)

W : angst , toxic Trent , bad words

English is not my first language 🫠

-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-

Your laughs came high with Jude because of a ridiculous joke he made, You couldn't resist and held your stomach hard. You two spent the last minutes gossiping nonstop until your third gave a reaction

"Why are you so fucking loud?"

Trent scoffed as he removed his headphones which he no longer heard much from it because of your voices, you looked at Trent while you narrowly hold your laugh.

"Then why don't you join us?" You looked at Jude and you two exploded with another bout of laughter, Trent rolled his eyes and went back to what he was doing. You used to mock him always, he was the calmest person among you and then you and then Jude ... I don't think he's even on the list of calm people. Very loud , funny , passionate and loved by almost everyone.

Either Trent? You wouldn't say he was the exact opposite, but he was remarkably calmer and conservative. And you were right in the middle. You've known your boys throughout your work here. You've been through all their wins and losses, and you wouldn't have been happier than seeing them happy around you. Of course you knew Trent a while before Jude, and by his coming you got closer to them more.

You continued gossiping next to Trent, who didn't take his head off from what he was watching until you decided to tease him a little by pulling his headphones

"I don't have time for games y/n give it back"

"Come and take it" you put it in youe head and looked at him with a playful look. He sighed and get up from his place in disbelief that he would engage in these childish acts, he stood in front of you and reached his hand waiting to get it back. And when he thought he'd get it you pulled it back from him and repeat it again and again, enjoying it.

"Alright keep it to yourself"

"Ugh you're so boring, I'll give it to Jude"

"let it be"

He returned to his seat surrendered and you smiled triumphantly to Jude "I told you he is in a shit mood today" You complete your conversation with Jude, and you're not realizing about someone else's gazes that almost penetrates you.

The following days passed without any events that might be remembered, the boys indulged in training and you got busy working too. Trent has been working a lot in recent times due to the decline in his level, that you noticed he was overexerting himself. Jude has been a supporter during this time a lot, in any case you've given the best of you to them as well.

Jude came to you to lie on the grass tired and then Trent followed him, you extended him the water bottle to drink

"You can't overstress yourself like that, in that way you'll collapse before you get better"

"When did you see me collapse before?"

He wiped his mouth and you looked at him with a smirk, you didn't deny that his confidence and foolish ego was attractive some times but your pride was too big to fall for him that way.

"You're a human after all"

You extended your hand for Jude to help him get up while Trent returned to the field, and you found yourself complaining to Jude involuntary.

"I think he ignores me sometimes"

"Ignores you how?"

"I don't know.. he doesn't treat me very well these times"

Jude arched his lips and put his hand on your shoulder

"Do you want me to talk to him about that?"

"No .. no Jude I'll deal with it"

Honestly you didn't know how to deal with it, you tried to think of something you did that might have bothered him, but he was your friend. He wouldn't be bothered by something that came from you, and if that happened he had come and let you know. So you didn't think of anything else than giving him time because he was a person with private space and you didn't like to intervene.

"Are you free tonight? We can spend time if you want"

"No Judie you better rest"

You knew he was trying to comfort you, but you didn't want to give the situation more attention, everything will be back as it was.

After that you started watching Trent's actions carefully, He was quiet as usual except for some annoyances act by harassing this and that. And by interacting with Jude so he won't notice what you're doing. Sometimes you noticed he prolonged looking at you, It was normal but it was intense this time and you decided to ignore this again because his actions are unpredictable. Jude was creating an atmosphere to talk as usual and you were trying to talk to Trent more, most of his answers were looking at you and nodding and you were smiling at him anyway. He excused to go and do something, and as soon as he left you sighed and you were on your own with Jude.

"Is that because I pulled his headphones?"

"I don't think so, I think you should talk to him"

"But I don't know what I've done"

Then you two stopped talking when he came back

"Something important I don't know about?"

"Nah bro we're not planning to kill you"

Trent hummed and Jude suddenly thought to leave you two alone so he look at you with an encouragement look and excused to leave, and at this moment you felt like you didn't know exactly what to say and why so you just looked at him until he noticed you

"Hmm?"

"Nothing but.. I wanted to know if you are upset from me"

"Why would I?"

"I don't know ask yourself"

"Nah you're delusional"

His answer wasn't enough to you and you even felt like he didn't want to give you the right answer so you wanted to press him more

"But Trent you've been ignoring me sometimes and I'd like to know if- "

"I told you y/n you're delusional, no one is ignoring anyone"

"Fine .. I have to go back to work"

He talked without even looking at you and you got up and went somewhere else, you barely understood that he was so carelessness to you and you still unanswered. You came across Jude on your way talking to someone then he noticed you and came to you

"So?"

He was waiting for your answer but you shook your head and didn't stop walking

"What happened?"

"Nothing interesting"

"Come on y/n you leave me unanswered"

"He didn't want to tell me anything"

You felt like he was a little harsh with you but you'll come tomorrow and pretend nothing has happened, until he makes an apology about this maybe.

"I'll talk to him"

"No need Jude"

You grabbed his arm and stopped him from helping you

"Everything will be alright".

You came home late and threw yourself on the couch, you were so tired that you lazed making food but you got up for a cup of tea as you think about what happened today. Bad mood Trent was all you thought about then you got a notification from your phone. It was Jude checking if you got home or yet. You loved how he cared about you and supported you always, very lucky to have a friend like Jude. You would never have compared him to Trent but after what happened today you started asking yourself if Trent had changed or not, but you knocked out all these thoughts and went to talk to him, so he might have gone back to normal a little bit

You

You awake?

Trentskii💥

Yeah

You

How do you feel?

Trentskii💥

I'm good

Why

You

Nothing I was just checking

Seen

You bit your lip and waited for him to react but he was silent, a little anger sneaked on you because he didn't think of apologizing for what happened today. Does it make sense that he forgot?

You

Did you forget something?

Trentskii💥

Don't think so

You

Oh

Seen

You

Why did you get so cold?

Trentskii💥

Am I?

You put your phone aside and decided it's better to sleep because there's no point in this. You were really mad at him this time to ignore you that way, and the worst thing is you didn't know why. He was bad and you couldn't bear it any more.

—————————————

He was looking at the ceiling for a long time, then he finally noticed that he couldn't sleep. He sighed and picked up his phone by the pillow and found nothing interesting or someone to talk to at this time except he was checking some chats. He huffed and he got up to sit on the edge of the bed stroking his forehead, the nights he wasn't able to sleep were awful. Suddenly he got a notification on his phone and you were checking if he was asleep or not. He took a moments to think about what to answer then he just go on with yeah. He found you asking how he was, something he didn't find out about, yet. He wasn't okay these time and you already figured this out. It's like he's not comfortable telling you things like he used to do .. and it got annoying for him. He found himself keeping you away from him which he didn't count and didn't want to do this to you but his feelings prevailed at that moment. He noticed that you ignored his last message and guess you gave up and just went to sleep.

In the morning, he found you avoiding even looking at him but he wasn't surprised anyway, expected to treat him this way indefinitely. Jude was going to her from time to time so he didn't worry about you being alone. Since morning, he hasn't spoken a word and been quiet so he found Robbo asking him if he was okay.

"I'm good no need to worry"

He was incredibly upset. And what upset him the most is when he sees you go to deep talks with Jude without feeling what's around you, just a lot of rubbish. You made an eye contact with him accidentally and he saw you turn your face and don't care about him at all. Which made him dispute more and more. He let the training early for today and was the first one who leave, doesn't want to see you and stop him on something.

Jude saw him leave quickly and couldn't reach him to stop him. He asked if you knew what's wrong with him today and you didn't think of telling him anything

"Do you want to go out tonight? I feel like work prevented me from the world a century ago"

Jude approved your ask and you finally felt like you were going to do something that felt good, and appreciate that one of your friends was with you, either Trent decided not to bother you two and go home and stay up over other things, his thoughts. Lots of concerns have come to him, not sure if the half of it was true or not until his head started hurting him

They say you won't know that you love someone until you see them fall in love with someone else. He finally confessed to himself but he won't dare tell you, not after seeing you so happy with Jude and not with him, and not after he pushed you himself from him. But what was he missing? He gave you everything he could and at the end he felt you prefer Jude instead of him. You made him feel shit so he put all the blame on you and not him.

And while that you were fooling around with Jude and having fun with him, you couldn't stop yourself from admiring all these moments .. running and laughing for no reasons and sneaking here and there in the city at night, hoping no one will catches you two. You felt you were free from everything, you felt like the world loved you. Although you're worried that someone will see you together and have problems but your mind was clearer than thinking of a problem right now.

Passing the luxurious bars of VIPs then down the streets and running randomly, the lights of the city's stars were so beautiful on you, but you felt like every one of them were blaming you for something you didn't know what was. Your hands were in your pockets and walking next to each other, breathing fresh air deeply and contemplate the streets. You looked at Jude and smiled and he smiled at you too

"What?"

"Nothing I'm just smiling"

"You're full of energy today"

You chuckled together, you were seeing Jude as your best friend next to Trent. You couldn't stop liking him always and all he does. He was very warm for you.

And at that moment you thought... What really prevents you from liking him really? He wouldn't have a problem or reject you mostly.. he was too kind for that, but you were not completely sure.

"Thank you for everything Jude"

"Come on, you wanted this and I tried to help you to be one of your best nights"

You laughed and held his arm, sighed with tiredness and pleasure. And before you go ahead to do any other action, Trent passed on your mind, wondering what he's doing now.. mostly stays up to watch NBA games or gets bored. Anyways he messed up your mood a little bit but you wanted to stay longer with Jude, apparently you didn't have a choice.

"Let's go back home, you must be tired"

"Yeah you're right"

"But Jude ..."

"Hm?"

Will you do it? Will you settle your situation, or will you just be doubtful and retreat? You were worried about his reaction, and Trent's reaction as well. Doing this means you're going to give up one of them and you're not going back like you were mostly. Why would you do it anyway? Yes, Jude was great with you in everything, but was he really your dream man maybe? You see him more as a best friend of yours. You felt so rushed and reckless and decided to end this before it got more reckless

"Oh no .. forget about it"

You were tired all the way by Jude's car and daydreaming on the views from the window. He get you home and make sure you entered the house, you waved him and close the door happily. You took your coat off and hung it, and before you did anything else the doorbell rang. You froze in your place and wondered who will visit you at this late hour of the night, the door knocked this time and you went to open it. Your mouth stayed a little open and you got nervous because he was the last visitor would have expected to come

"Trent?"

He stand there only looking at you through his dark eyes so you decided to stand back to let him in

"Come in it's freezing outside"

He get in and closed the door behind him and leaned on it with his back

"Where were you?"

"Outside.. just stayed up with some friends, why?"

"I called you until I decided to come myself and check, are you sure you were with just friends?"

You forgot that your phone was on silent and you were barely going to hear it while you were out there. But what you didn't understand was Trent's language by saying friends, you felt like he was blaming you

"What do you mean by friends Trent? And I'm sorry but I forgot my phone in silent mode"

"I mean if he was Jude or not"

"And what's wrong if Jude was with me or not?"

"He was Jude then"

He smirked and bit his lower lip, you were standing there pointlessly waiting to justify his situation by coming this time, and also hearing his reasons for asking these strange questions

"I can't understand you Trent, what are you trying to say?"

He shrugged his shoulders and stayed there just watching you

"You don't pretend everything's okay with us after all this, don't you?"

"Everything is cool"

"Trent! Stop being a fool and tell me what you want"

He came to you and stood inches away from you, you didn't want to walk away so you stood here staring at him in misunderstanding

"Tell me why you were with Jude"

"it's none of your business"

You simply said in defiance of his harsh looks

"I expect something more intimate"

"I said it's none of your business"

"Why? Didn't you bother yoreself telling me at least?"

"I was tired of you and your actions, so decided to take a break"

"Of me?"

He scoffed and looked at you with an arrogant look, and you weren't good under his looks at you that almost breaking you through

"Don't act stupid now"

He approached your face seriously and you felt like that you could barely breathe, your legs were holding you hardly because of the gaze he still kept

"I want to know what happened between you and Jude"

"I don't like to repeat-"

"Maybe you would tell me how many times you fucked him this time"

You pushed him hard from his chest, not believing what he was raving about and started yelling at him hysterically

"Are you drunk? Did you lose your fucking mind or what? Answer me Trent I can't handle any more of your shit"

"Can't you just say you've been a fool for him all this time"

"Not before I know why you suddenly decided to become a big asshole"

You didn't think of lowering your voice because anger was your sense at that moment and you didn't care if neighbors would hear you or not. And you saw Trent trying to control himself but you just go ahead

"You just ignore me until you show up at my house like you care about me, and you know what? Yes! I was going to confess for him an hour ago and gonna do it tomorrow either"

He insisted on his teeth and quickly approached you holding your arms, you struggled so hard to free yourself from him but he was stronger than you and hold you to look at him only

"You were just blind, you didn't see what I was doing for you because you didn't see someone who isn't Jude and insisted on your blindness"

"Trent you're hurting me"

"I cared about you many times, why didn't you notice me then?"

"Why didn't you make me then?"

"Was I even enough for you? Because you made me feel nothing"

He was just screaming at you there, evil flies out of his eyes and he become someone you never knew

"What the fuck is wrong with you"

The tears began to form in your eyes unwilling and your voice came shaking. Your brain couldn't bear that your best friend suddenly became a stranger to you, He even suspected you and Jude in a wrong way, hided his feelings and put the blame on you. He moved away from you after finally realizing he was tough with you, stood there without expressions on his face to watch you just shed tears. You covered your eyes trying to stop it but you were weaker than that, hours ago you had a great evening until it eventually just turned into tears and you wouldn't have forgiven Trent for this.

You felt his arms surrounding you and tried to get away from him but he didn't let you

"Just leave me alone and get out of here"

You muttered amid your tears not satisfied with his trying to comfort you after that but he didn't moved at all

"I didn't mean it"

"After what?"

He get away to grab your face and look at it closely while wiping away your tears, you didn't like his attempts yet but you just surrendered on his touches. Suddenly he hold your hand and sit on the couch then pulled you to sit on his thighs. You were surprised by his actions which you weren't used to and looked at him

"Why like this"

He didn't answer you and surround your waist with his hands

"You know .. I just fucked up so I decided to finish this early"

"Finishing what?"

"Don't act so stupid, I can't see you with him anymore"

"But Jude is my friend!"

You got nervous from this very close position and you turned your face so you could breathe a little bit

"And I don't want to see you more than friends"

"What's your excuse?"

You still avoiding any eye contact with him unaware of exactly what he wants from you. He put his hand behind your neck to make you look at him, making you more nervous because of this heavy atmosphere

"Just look at me, am I enough for you?"

"Trent .."

You felt like he was doing this on purpose to make you confuse, but he was very close to your face, so close that you sank into his eyes.

"Answer me"

"of course you are"

Your voice turned to whispers, lost between the features of his face and his look. You didn't notice that he was this hot from close before, and you felt guilt that you didn't give him the right space to make him confess to you

"You just had to tell me this before .. you know"

He looked at you with a cold look and put his hands on your thighs then you finally realized

"Oh right .. you're Trent"

He smiled and brought you closer to his face and touch your cheeks with his lips

"Can I kiss you now?"

He asked nicely with his hands squeezing your thigh now

"Not before you say sorry"

He exhaled heavily and came down to your neck to put a few soft kisses that made you laugh and told him to stop, but he kept doing it, then he raised his head to meet your eyes again and whispered I love you. And before you even respond he pulled you for a kiss that made your stomach disturb. A butterfly kiss , a heavy kiss , and praise you between each one .. anything to never let you go.

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I'm not completely happy with the final result 🫠 but let me know about your feedbacks ! Hope u enjoyed <3