#this is not a comprehensive list so die mad about it

[understandableparadox]

a comprehensive list of everything wrong with hazbin hotel.

quick note before i lose myself in madness, my standards for helluvaboss are non existent because its a free show on youtube. also i kinda like helluvaboss and i will indulge in any bias i damn well please.

oh and spoilers. i guess.

the greater narrative of the entire season is "White lady civilize inner city hoodlum". ex: The blind side. rich girl, affluent family yadda yadda.

the story is set up to be like amphibia, owl house, svtfoe, steven universe, that being starting as something episodic then transforming into story driven narrative. why? because we know the benefits and drawbacks, episodic starts allows us to wander the world, it allows us to understand the dynamics, we are not forced to reckon with anything because there is no deadline. characters are allowed to bloom and shine and the audience can actually get attached.

the source material is Vary Clearly formed from remnants of something out of a middle school edgelord narrative. the usage of transformation, the big spooky grins, the "and then i smile as my eyes glow and-"-isms which in most cases i don't mind because in some instances but in a vary Particular case its astoundingly annoying and that annoyance is like a mold, shit spreads quick.

the color Red. as a lover of homestuck cherubs and karkat and aradia, as someone who fucking loves the color red, it is so painful to say but holy shit tone it the fuck down, i know its hell but their are so many other colors that you can use, its everywhere, the streets, the air, the windows, the screens, the characters, i know the pride ring is represented with red but change up the palates every so often for backgrounds

the rush, this ties into the second point made but i think the story itself is rushed. we know everything way to early. i know way to much and it makes it hard to care about anything because im still trying to digest the last chunk of info. "oh ok, so they clear out hell once a year. oh hell has a heaven embassy? ok. oh that adam the angel, i though he wou- oh its every 6 months now. wait the exterminators die a lot? then why is everyone sca- people in hell already have weapons that can kill angels? w- oh we are in heaven now, ok ma- no one in heaven except for the elites know the exterminations occur? how do-" and its that, just this incessant rush to explain everything to you. notably that's just the god damn spark notes, we need to know everything about the characters now, every single bit of their story, their insecurities, what charlie needs to fix, how she can fix them, the major bad guys, everything. you are never allowed to dwell on a character because we need to rush towards something else. it almost feels like this should have been like... season three, it would have been a fantastic season three if you dropped the introductions honestly.

the concept of redemption. for a story of redemption to work you need to look at three things. What is there crime, Do they want to change, What is preventing them from changeing? there is only one single character that has a notable path of redemption, angel dust, but if you look through their story it feels off. What Exactly is he guilty of? he has sex, does drugs and drinks. his apparent nymphomania is tied to his sad backstory as someone forced into the sex industry so how is that their fault? then if you think about it you start to spiral and notice "hey why are most of these people in hell?" like sure some of them may deserve punishment but then you see the fucking dichotomy and its like "I was a inventor in england and died of the fucking plague, i may have made evil little contraption hoohoohoo" vs "I was a cannibal, a full on cannibal, i fucking killed people and ate them and then someone shot me". ONE OF THESE THINGS ARE A LITTLE MORE FUCKING EXTREME. i'm going to go fucking nuts, the thing they went to heaven with when presenting a case to angels on the idea that redemption and becoming a better person is actually real was angel dust not drinking at a party and not having sex with consenting adults and i want to go fucking insane. WHAT IS THE CRIME, WHO IS THROWING THE BOOK, WHAT DOES THE BOOK INTEL, ARE WE ON GOOD PLACE RULES?! half the cast dont Need redemption they need fucking help, and the other half of the cast do need redemption but they do not seek it making the point moot. sir pentious acts like he has the brain of a hyper intelligent toddler tossing about toys, its almost like he did his one bad thing of spying and then got caught, sank his little diddy about forgiveness and second chances and become a null point through out the rest of the series, sure their was Some weight to him sacrificing himself, he was a decently funny character and he had good moments but him popping up in heaven felt like a fore gone conclusion, he didn't deserve to be in hell so why do i care that he is suddenly in heaven? because its working on the concept the good place already made. no one actually deserves eternal punishment they just need help processing what makes them a dick, but instead of looking at all the parts of the afterlife that make it bad, inefficient and then creating and trying ideas to see if it work instead over a few seasons, we crash dick first into all the major plot points in regards to that and say "tada, we fixed it.".

having a sub-plot about sexual assault and its victims then having multiple sexual assault related gag ruins your point.

don't make a bunch of stereotypically jewish characters into cannibals, that was a big thing, really shouldn't have to say it.

if you are going to make a character black, make them black, you can say alastor was black but sweet seren-fucking-dippity that's not a black man.

pot meet kettle but yeah the cursing could be a little less liberal. maybe just blue hair or the pronouns, not both.

there is a very distinctive art deco/jazz aesthetic which normally i love but i feel as though it is not used to its full extent and in some cases really hurts the character design in and of itself.

this is a vary obvious bit but the story is a million times more interested in gay men then it is of lesbians, which culminates in this insane thing where the writers clearly have more talent or perhaps it would be more abt to say practice writing male gay pining then they are with lesbian pining. which i personally think is hilarious because i did not know you could min max fujoshi-ism that hard.

this next section is more to do with each character on a fundamental level, for the sake of brevity whatever there is left, i'm just doing ones with speaking roles.

13. Charlie:

(see what i mean about that red thing?)

as originally stated charlie fits rather comfortably into every white saviour narrative, though that seems to be part of her joke. though i'm not entirely sure how much of a joke it can be when its rewarded and expected to advance the plot.

her character design says nothing, it has the motif of old puppets or dolls, she wears something vaguely similar to service suits, her demonic form is just some extra horns.not to say every character needs to have their life on a clothes rack but some more snake and goat imagery would be nice

its not the chol design of charlie with snake hair, not an actual problem but its a problem to me, damn you @cholvoq for ruining my ability to look at any of the characters without wishing i was seeing your designs instead.

character wise aside from the white savoir bit, i'm having a bit of trouble understanding what the arc of the character is. she is shown to be naive, someone who doesn't understand how the world works but everytime she says something its something astoundingly clear like "people can actually get better". and its treated like someone demanded faygo in every water fountain. is the joke that the world around her to cynical or is so to naive? please pick one or the other.

now if you know me, you know i fucking hate overpowered characters with a blinding passion, one that would set alit the god damn abyss but in this one special instance, i feel like its warranted, she's the direct descendant of fucking God, she can swing her weight around a little, i mean god damn. she in so many instances looks like shes cowering so often, why would the daughter of lucifer get backed down by some rando pimp? why wasn't she the one to fight adam? sure you can say she is young but how young? her parents were there since pre-abrahamic times, most of the characters showed up in hell in the 1900s, some of them showed up in the 1600s, how old is charlie??? how long does it take for her to learn how to be strong? The story does not suffer if charlie is strong and knows she is strong. it can easily be a case of "i don't believe in violence to a weird degree". fit it into her apparent naivety about the world to believe that violence is never the answer even when dealing with a being that is unilaterally horrible and abusive and monstrous.

she ga- no im kidding, i do think her romance was waysided a bit, it would have been fine to have more scenes of them togather and in love you know?

14. Vaggie

why did you name the lesbian vaggie...? Don't do that maybe?

I like how her design is almost moth like but again i feel as though you could have amped that up.

she feels as though someone tried to combine undyne and pearl from steven universe, same story beats and design elements. it makes it hard to really distinguish her as a character.

i honestly dont have much to say about her. she is fine.

christ kill me, lets just get the big one out of the way

15. Alastor.

God Damn

where to start.

"alastor is mixed race" mixed with fucking what? concrete? there is not a single black feature on that creature, now im not saying you have to make him a png of louie armstrong but it wouldn't hurt to add a curl to the hair maybe? make it a tiny bit more wavy? Something? a crumb i beg of thee?

his symbolism is all over the god damn place, native american monsters (you know the one), voodoo, radio, puppets, stitches, circuses??? and Tentacles i guess. two of those are from closed religions so if you dumped those you would actually get a more concise character focused on the concept of vox populi as a means of societal control and influence as we see in his first song. but again that gets drowned out repeatedly by all the other random toy box bits shoved into him.

tumblr sexy man bait

he serves no purpose in the story. he does spooky stuff, pretends to do things and then goes back to sitting around looking spooky. i understand that his motif is supposed to be aloof mastermind but maybe have him do more mastermindy things? if you remove most of alastors scenes, bar the songs, it doesn't change all to much. husk and nifity can still be at the hotel, they could be looking for outs in their contracts the same as angel dust. hell it even helps with the one scene where he dose some spooky shit, asking charlie for a favor in exchange for his help in the fight with the angels instead of asking him about angel weapons which should have remained a strictly vaggie scene.

his presence in a way delegitimize the story, as I noted in in the section regarding redemption, the three parts are "what is the crime, do they want to change, what is stopping them?" and alastor kinda just spits in the face of that. he is a serial killer cannibal that has no qualms about how evil he is and apparently must continue being evil due to being under the control under someone legitimately called the Root Of All Evil. show him take a slight interest in the idea that maybe shit for him could be better, make him Want Change at the bare fucking minimum or dont have him at the hotel.

his stupid little fucking horns, big shot the troll liker wants characters to have big fucking horns, make them noticeable or dont have them.

he looks more like a dog boy, which could have been an interesting thing with the collar motif but fuck me i guess.

personal pet peeve but i fucking hate characters that have a million plus powers, stick to a set number, be creative.

im getting more petty as i go on so last point: he could have been in less episodes, he didn't need to be in dad beat dad, that should have been just a lucifer and charlie episode. inverse the red and black and i think he would be fucking great color wise, his body type is the same as ten different characters, he isnt radio enough, aside from the voice and and staff if you told me he was the fucking Cat Demon i would have been just as convinced.

16. Angel Dust

what the fuck, gay spider? its hard to actully articulate all the thoughts i have on angel dust, not in the sense that he is a deeply thought provoking character but in the fact that there is not much meat on the bones.

all around i think angel dust is kinda middling. he has a decent enough romance with husk, he has a decent enough story line that revolves around battling addiction and removing yourself from an abuser (which the story tries to brand as "Redemption???")

I dont like that most of his jokes would qualify as sexual harassment, i don't mind him being sexual as a character but continuing on when clearly someone doesn't like the jokes hurts the character.

not a critique but he is pink, which honestly ill fucking take at point, as long as its not more fucking red.

i think his design is an improvement over some of the old vivzie designs but it feels like it could have done with going a few more rounds of design changes.

same thing with alastor, charlie and vaggie, there is not enough of the animal that they are supposed to be. You could have told me angel dust was a fucking bee or something and i would have had to believe you. nothing about angel dust initially says spider, hell he dosent even have enough limps to be a fucking spider.

17. Carmilla carmine

are... are you supposed to be a rabbit...?

Big Yoai Hands

ballet fighting style, could have been cool, wish she fought more like sanji or chun li.

A single mom that works to hard, who loves her kids and never stops-

her song was decent, not great, decent. it feels as though the actress has experience singing but not in the way they tried to make her sing during her two songs. they have a obvious mexican influence, honestly just let her sing in spanish in the english dub. go listen to the spanish dub, "out for love" sounds great in spanish.

i wish i had more thoughts on them, fucking rip.

18. cherri bomb

that's not a punk aesthetic that's 2010s alt

decent character, they showed up once or twice i guess, no real thoughts.

19. egg boiz

absolutely perfect, i have not notes on them, these are perfect creatures.

20. Emily

im so fucking happy to see a singular blue character

does the naive dreamer bit better then charlie

We really shouldnt have seen her until the end of season two or middle of three.

good contrast with the other angels on screen.

Wait she is supposed to be black??? Where???

21. Husk

keith david you absolute delight, Why on gods green earth did they only give you one singing part?

one of the few charecters where its clear husk is a cat, i do like the kinda... marquee design, he is a magic cat, thats neat. i still think you can toss the wings and eyebrows and still have just as good of a charecter.

has a deeply intresting story of someone who died as a nobody, became the fat cat of hell and then was forced back to the bottom by their own vices, not used at fucking all.

huge potential, little pay off.

22. lillith

I know nothing about her except she ditched her kid and husband to vacation in heaven and i think thats kinda funny.

alot of werid things floating around her, again she shouldnt have been shown in the show at all until next season.

23. lucifer morningstar

no notes, funniest charecter, did a song based on friend like me.

few notes: i do like the idea that the immortal symbol of pride is a constant emotional wreckage constantly seeking approval through grand showmanship and manic energy that threatens to take over anything they touch.

would have liked more snake stuff on him, maybe some more goat things like horns.

that is such a stupid fucking staff lmao.

24. Adam.

alex brightman you absolute fucking delight, you should have had more songs.

I wish his design was more focused on the idea of him being a glam rock wash up

I fucking hate his mask

We shouldn't have met him until the end of the season.

25. Niffty

again she is supposed to be a bug or cockroach but nothing about her points to that.

token straight

keeps rocketing back and fourth between sexulization and infantilization

you had kimiko glenn but didnt give her a single fucking song?

26. Sir Pentious

the secret season one redeemed.

the pilot version of him felt more like someone that could do a season one redemption arc, a megalomaniac constantly attempting territory grabs, there is something you can work with, actual character flaws to work through.

essentially a child after the first episode.

actually a snake which i appreciate.

no where near steampunky enough.

27. the villians of the show dont make much sense, each one feels like they should be season long deals on their own instead of a bunch of team rocket esque idiots that show up on occasion, do a bad thing and then leave.

28. Valentino

gOD THERE IS SO MUCH RED

only a moth some of the time.

sucks as a villain, maybe they need more screen time to show why they suck in a more substantial way aside from being told that he sucks.

it is interesting that angel dust is only under his magical control when in the studio, it shows that angel dust has to make a conscious choice to return, which in turn can be made to show how abusers can draw back their victims. I do not think it was done well in this circumstance as it shows him to be cartoonishly evil, constantly flying back and fourth between sweet and utter psycho, there is no actual reason for angel dust to ever actually go back to the studio, he just does so every so often.

29. Vox

legit who cares? the only thing about him that is in any way substantial is all the dope ass fan art we get.

propaganda machine angle that is not explored at all, just hinted at. no actual barring on the story whatsoever.

why didn't he try to do the same shit as alastor by the way? he knows its bad if alastor gets in good with charlie so shouldn't it be a ass kissing race?

same body shape as literally every other male character.

tumblr sexy man version of pyrocynicals fursona.

30. Valvette

the actual poster child of the shows huge problem of "Show me, don't tell me".

apparently the glue that holds the villains together. never shown.

apparently the one that makes the love potions that valentino is famous for. had to learn about that in the fuckin wiki trivias

we know so much about her from things outside of the show.

was there to call carmilla a coward, that's her plot contribution. she shows up every now and again but its never anything substantial and serves to more around take up run time for people We Don't Need To Know Yet.

im not trying to be mean, animation is animation, we need smaller studios to have success in the industry so that other indie studios can have that success, felling a tree makes it easier for others to follow. showing that its possible to number brain rot exacs helps all animators.

but this show has so much bullshit attached to it, it has so much fucking potential that it fries my brain with unyielding frustration.

this took a bit to write, im tired, thanks for reading.

[naryrising]

So you like imaginary fandoms...

With the recent success of Goncharov, I thought I'd make a post to mention some of the previous times this has happened in fandom, and a brief explanation and some links on how you can find works for them. I don't claim that this is a comprehensive list, it's just ones that came to me off the top of my head based on several decades of fandom involvement.

Ghost Soup Infidel Blue. Originates from the annual Yuletide exchange, specifically a post by liviapenn in 2007 that used it as a default fandom to help explain how to write 'dear author' letters. The relevant quote (meant to illustrate the kind of letter that would be too specific) was "'Bad: "I would like a Ghost Soup story where Luke makes out with Angela's clone and Angela gets mad and seduces Moira just to make Luke mad, and then Ryan and Luke duel to the death with their lightsabers and it ends up in an Angela/Angela's clone/Moira threesome. And Ryan feels really bad and flies off to Mars forever."" Consensus is that it is a sprawling space opera anime series, something like Gundam or Macross, with many sub-parts and spin-offs. Part of the dynamic of Ghost Soup 'fandom' is people arguing in the notes and comments about the continuity or quality of these various spinoffs (e.g. Purple is reputed to be bad, but some people will staunchly defend it just to be contrary.) Deliberate wank and badfic is part of the humour. You can read the Fanlore post about Ghost Soup here and find works for it and its related fandoms here

Winterblumensaat. Again, this comes out of Yuletide, specifically a nomination in 2021 for what was strongly suspected to be a nonexistent German book. The nominator's sister found it in a flea market! It very definitely was real! They couldn't provide any evidence or a photo of the book, but they promise it was definitely a real book! Despite being rejected from Yuletide nominations as not having any basis in reality, it has nevertheless had some fics written for it. The AO3 tag is merged into Original Work, so you can find them by searching in Original Work for Winterblumensaat (results here). It seems to be a moody, dark mid-century European novel, with characters named Florientina, Mailia, Schnail, and Markus. A related non-existent fandom with the same origin story is Nur die Sonne - Maria Moßer, but this has only attracted one work so far (a crossover with Winterblumensaat).

Cordelia (Movie Poster). In 2020 a movie poster for the movie Cordelia came out that inspired fandom in ways probably not intended by the movie's creators. While the actual movie Cordelia is a contemporary horror/thriller, the poster gave people the impression that it might be about Victorian femdom with pegging. Needless to say, they were disappointed by whatever was in the actual film, and made up fic based on what they thought the poster was about instead. Currently ALL works in the Cordelia (2020) tag on AO3 are actually about the poster and not the movie.

Invisible Ficathon. In 2014 an exchange called Invisible Ficathon ran, which was based around "stories that never were". Nominated "canons" had to be nonexistent fictional works referenced in another work. Examples given included "The Casebook of Sherlock Holmes - Joan Watson" (from Elementary), "The Itchy and Scratchy Show" (from The Simpsons), the books in Lucien's library in The Sandman that only exist in dreams, and so on. The collections on AO3 contain 71 works for nonexistent fandoms. Alas that this exchange only ran once, because it was a fun concept. I think with the renewed interest in Goncharov, it would be ripe for revival.

[nightprompts]

&. 𝐡𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐝 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬.

(  various  non - halloween  themed  dialogue  prompts  for  all  your  slashers,  final  girls,  and  other  horrors  beyond  your  comprehension.  trigger  warning  for  dark  themes.  feel  free  to  edit  as  you  seem  fit.  ) 

❛ it’s the silence that scares me. ❜

❛ i’m every nightmare you ever had. ❜

❛ i want to see your true face. ❜

❛ one way or another, you’re going to die tonight. ❜

❛ just because you don’t see it, doesn’t mean it’s not already here. ❜

❛ by the time anyone finds your body, they won’t be able to identify it. ❜

❛ you’re playing a dangerous game here, girl. ❜

❛ i’m playing the villain, just like you wanted. ❜

❛ i won’t give up on you, i know you’re worth it! ❜

❛ scream all you want. no one will hear you. ❜

❛ what are you going to do to me? ❜

❛ there you are, my darling! ❜

❛ i knew you would come back to me. ❜

❛ don’t you want to be consumed by what loves you? ❜

❛ i’m going to send you back to hell where you came from! ❜

❛ you can’t keep me here forever! ❜

❛ how are you still alive? i killed you! ❜

❛ sometimes human spaces make inhuman monsters. ❜

❛ please. why don’t you just let me go? ❜

❛ this missing poster has your face on it. ❜

❛ that wasn’t so bad, was it? ❜

❛ what’s wrong, you don’t trust me? ❜

❛ i know a lot about you. more than you think. ❜

❛ you want me to shut him up for you? ❜

❛ we could have been beautiful together. ❜

❛ when you think you’re alone, someone watches. ❜

❛ rest while you can, because i will hunt you and eat you whole. ❜

❛ what you want is very wrong. ❜

❛ you look so pretty all tied up like this. ❜

❛ what, you like to watch? you goddamn sicko. ❜

❛ god isn’t here. god doesn’t even know about this place. ❜

❛ there is something at work in my soul which i do not understand. ❜

❛ i am the devil, and i am here to do the devil’s work. ❜

❛ you know what they say, an eye for an eye. ❜

❛ why don’t you scream for me? ❜

❛ are you... smelling me? ❜

❛ we’re going to die out here. ❜

❛ i’m not afraid of anything. not anymore. ❜

❛ we will be what everyone wants to be. perfect. ❜

❛ no offense, but i think you might be just a little too crazy for me. ❜

❛ we all go a little mad sometimes. ❜

❛ the harder i try to escape, the further i get into this awful place. ❜

❛ this was not how it was supposed to go! ❜

❛ this is the end of your little game. i win. ❜

❛ don’t leave me! i can’t be alone! ❜

❛ no one is coming for you. ❜

❛ you hide. and i’ll try to find you. sound fun? ❜

❛ fuck this place. seriously, just fuck this place. ❜

❛ what’s the matter, honey? you’ve barely touched your dinner. ❜

❛ don’t be afraid. dying is much easier than living. ❜

❛ i won’t let them kill you. i won’t let them even touch you. ❜

❛ let’s get you some clothes before i get too turned on. ❜

❛ you weren’t putting that tongue to use anyway. ❜

❛ shall i drink your blood fresh, or slice your neck and spill it out first? ❜

❛ dying keeps moving lower on the list of worst things that could happen to me. ❜

[utilitycaster]

Sort of related to the post about people coming in for shipping but something that’s struck me, as actual play fandom has spread, is that there is a certain lack of genre awareness currently - not just surrounding Critical Role, to be honest; it’s a frustration for me for the conversation surrounding Dimension 20 and Worlds Beyond Number for a while as well.

Take fate, for example. The idea of fate, whether it’s as specific as an ancient prophecy, or as broad as the general concept of destiny, is absolutely at the core of so many classic fantasy series that to be vehemently opposed to it within Critical Role is to display profound ignorance of the genre of fantasy. It’s akin to showing up to a sporting event and getting mad that people are running around in athletic gear; it’s like going to an Italian restaurant in the US and screaming in the face of the waiter when they give you bread and olive oil. There is not, per se, a required reading list. You do not need to read nor watch all of Lord of the Rings let alone consider it a formative work; Sam Riegel and Aabria Iyengar sure haven’t. But if you are not familiar with the genre at all, at the very least you do need to come with a certain awareness that you are not familiar with the genre and be open to its conventions. And to be clear: it’s valid to hate the theme of things being fated. But again, that’s like hating they serve bread and olive oil at the Italian restaurant; you should probably simply not go to Italian restaurants.

Another example that is my personal source of irritation is the obsession with radiation as a factor in Burrow’s End. Setting aside my original irritation at just good old-fashioned lack of reading comprehension with the conflation of the poison and the Blue/the Light, the idea that the intelligence was induced by radiation is really…not genre aware. Like, I recognize I’m coming at this with rather more knowledge than average (from a scientific rather than genre-aware perspective no less) but to get back to genre, I take no issue with, say, radiation in comic books. I know the premise of Spider-Man or of Doctor Manhattan’s origins is absolutely ridiculous; but that’s the genre. Radiation in comic books exists to be an easy origin story so we can get to the point of “here’s a guy with powers”. However, in a show that derives its narrative language from Watership Down and Mrs. Frisby and the Rats of Nimh, the idea that the magic and the lightning and the source of intelligence are radiation makes little sense. Another example is the weird response to Skip in Starstruck; the idea of an alien brain parasite like that is so genre-typical to space opera it feels like, again, someone going to an Italian restaurant, pointing at the bread, and saying “WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT? HOW DARE YOU!”

I think my particular frustration with both of the above (and when I talk about Worlds Beyond Number) is that those people ignorant of genre and not letting it wash over them a la Sam will often fall back to the real world (although, unfortunately, not when it comes to radiation) when trying to make sense of the narrative without the signposts, language, and tropes of the genres to which they belong. To understand the subversions or deconstructions that are likely to occur in, for example, the upcoming exploration of the Citadel in Worlds Beyond Number, you need to be open to the idea that it is a complicated place and not simply The Evil Empire That Suvi Will Definitely Leave; if you’re utterly suspicious of everyone and refuse to try to understand why this is a place people enjoy let alone will die for, you can’t actually experience the story. We are going into the Citadel arc; these wizards will be humanized, and if you have closed off your mind to them already you have set yourself up to be miserable. I do think it’s great that actual play has found an increasingly large audience, but the medium of actual play also carries a certain lexicon and ignorance of it will skew one’s interpretations. My personal bugbear here is of course interpreting bog-standard tanking strategies as either romantic or self-sacrificial in intent, but in general, any resistance to the mere concept of gaining power, the existence of concrete deities, combat, and the placement of plot above romance in D&D are all signs of this ignorance. And again: ignorance is fine! But with all of the above there also often comes this entitlement to a story that is familiar, in blatant disregard for those parameters of genre and medium, and I have to wonder, again, why people mad that a fantasy story is leaning heavily on fantasy story norms, or why D&D has combat, are still showing up to the fantasy D&D story. To return to the Italian restaurant, which is getting a lot of terrible patrons in this metaphor, it feels like a lot of people are showing up to this restaurant because they heard it was good, but then becoming furious it won’t serve them peanut butter and jelly. People who are not familiar should still be welcome, but that lack of familiarity needs to be accompanied by an openness and desire to learn, rather than the entitlement that is so often present.

[hawkeyeslaughter]

a comprehensive list of songs and lyrics that remind me of hawkeye pierce ( either about him / his perspective ) ( will be updated )

angst / sad

— johnny cash , hurt — “ what have i become / my sweetest friend / everyone i know / goes away in the end “

— jason isbell , white elephant — “ there’s one thing that’s real clear to me / no one dies with dignity / we just try to ignore the elephants of now “

— todd snider , too soon to tell — “ and dear lord if you’re up there / you sure got some nerve / seems like even the wicked / they get worse than they deserve “

— warren zevon , hasten down the wind — “ she’s so many women / he can’t find the one who was his friend / so he’s hangin’ on to half her heart / he can’t have the restless part / so he tells her to hasten down the wind “

— boy genius , afraid of heights — “ when the black water ate you up / like a sugar cube in a teacup / i got the point you were making / when i held my breath ‘ till you came up “

— surf curse , freaks — “ i am just a freak / my head is filled with parasites / i dream of you almost every night / hopefully i won’t wake up this time “

— dandelion hands , i could have sworn you were dead — “ i could have sworn you were dead / but i saw you in a dream last night / there were flowers growing out of your head / and it made me smile “

— todd snider , carla — “ leaving me was one thing carla / why’d you have to leave so slow / i didn’t mind you walking away / what hurt was how you walked so slow “

— willie nelson , angel flying too close to the ground — “ and i patched up your broken wing / and hung around awhile / trying to keep your spirits up / and your fever down “

fun

— bruce springsteen , born to run — “ together wendy we can live with the sadness / i’ll love you with all of the madness in my soul “

— todd snider , ballad of the devil’s backbone tavern — “ life’s too short to hurry / life’s too long to wait / too short not to love everybody / life’s too long to hate “

— hozier , someone new — “ i fall in love just a little oh , little bit / every day with someone new “

— mgmt , me and michael — “ in every scene , it’s me and michael / imaginary bombs raining down from the clouds / so it seems / the danger will never let the feelings die “

— billy joel , only the good die young — “ we might be laughing a bit too loud / oh , but that never hurt no one “

— alanis morissette , hand in my pocket — “ i’m sad , but i’m laughing / i’m brave , but i’m chicken shit / i’m sick , but i’m pretty , baby “

— aha , take on me — “ take on me ( take on me ) / take me on ( take on me ) / i’ll be gone / in a day or two “

— crosby , stills , & nash , love the one you’re with — “ well there’s a rose / in the fisted glove / and eagle flies / with the dove / and if you can’t be / with the one you love / honey , love the one you’re with “

love songs

— r.e.m , at my most beautiful — “ i found a way to make you / i found a way / a way to make you smile “

— john prine , iris dement , in spite of ourselves — “ in spite of ourselves / we’ll end up sitting on a rainbow / against all odds / honey , we’re the front door prize “

— arctic monkeys , baby i’m yours — “ baby i’m yours ( baby i’m yours ) / and i’ll be yours / until two and two is three “

—the cults , always forever — “ you and me / always forever “

— coldplay , sparks — “ and i know i was wrong / but i won’t let you down / oh , yeah , yeah , yeah i will / yes i will “

old songs

— etta james , one for my baby — “ i could tell you a lot / but i know you got to remain / true to your code / just make it one for my baby / and one more for the road “

— elvis presley , love me — “ treat me like a fool / treat me mean and cruel / but love me “

— frank sinatra , i get a kick out of you — “ some , they go for cocaine / i’m sure that if i took even one sniff / that would bore me terrifically , too / but i get a kick out of you “

— dooley wilson , as time goes by — “ you must remember this / a kiss is just a kiss / a sigh is just a sigh / the fundamental things apply / as time goes by “

— frank sinatra , in the wee small hours of the morning — “ when your lonely heart has learned its lesson / you’d be her’s , if only she would call / in the wee small hours in the morning / that’s the time you miss her most of all “

i have no explanation for these i honestly can just imagine him liking them . or singing them . obnoxiously .

— the gourds , fossil contender — “ well , how would you feel / if i dug up your head ? / well i wouldn’t want to be answerin’ any of your / loaded questions , no “

— counting crows , mr . jones and me — “ mr . jones wishes he was someone just a little more funky / when everybody loves you / oh son , that’s just about as funky as you can be “

— don mclean , vincent — “ and when no hope was left inside on that starry , starry night / you took your life , as lovers often do / but i could have told you , vincent / that this world was never meant for one as beautiful as you “

— warren zevon , werewolves of london — “ you hear them howlin’ around your kitchen door / better not let ‘em in / little old lady got mutilated late last night / werewolves of london again “

— queen , bohemian rhapsody — “ mama , ooh / i don’t wanna die / sometimes wish i’d never been born at all “ ( i’m sorry but you guys know he’d fucking love this song . idk what to tell you . )

— weezer , buddy holly — “ whoo - wee i look just like buddy holly / oh , oh and you’re mary tyler moore “ ( sorry . again . but we know it’s true )

unfortunately i am under the opinion that hawkeye would know all of the pitch perfect songs . there is nothing you can do to sway me from this opinion .

[oh1theseus]

today i bring u a comprehensive list of songs that are * definitely * about robb and theon bc i love these silly tragic men So Much

(happy pride especially to the GoT gays)

little soldiers - the crane wives ("on the broken backs of all the words we spared/like little soldiers in the trenches/it was a march we made towards ruin and despair/but we held hands all the while/i swear that i loved you")

allies or enemies - the crane wives ("remember when i could tell you not to smile when you were mad/and you would always crack/and we'd both be laughing in the end/now you're not so quick to forget/are we allies or enemies/this will be the death of me")

once more to see you - mitski ("but with everybody watching us/our every move/we do have reputations/we keep it secret/won't let them have it/so come inside and be with me/alone with me/alone")

futile devices - sufjan stevens ("it's been a long long time since i've memorized your face/it's been four hours now since i've wandered through your place/and when I sleep on your couch/i feel very safe")

i will follow you into the dark - specifically the miya folick version ("love of mine/someday you will die/but i'll be close behind/i'll follow you into the dark/no blinding light/or tunnels to gates of white/just our hands clasped so tight/waiting for the hint of a spark")

sinking man - of monsters and men ("cold dark sea/wrapping its arms around me/pulling me down to the deep/all eyes on me/i pus you away/although i wished you could stay/so many words left unsaid/but i'm all out of breath")

king and lionheart - of monsters and men ("and in the sea that's painted black/creatures lurk below the deck/but you're a king and i'm a lionheart/and as the world comes to an end/i'll be here to hold your hand")

dark paradise - lana del ray ("and there's no remedy for memory/your face is like a melody/it won't leave my head/your sould is haunting me and telling me that everything is fine/but i wish i was dead/dead like you/every time i close my eyes it's like a dark paradise/no one comparers to you/i'm scared that you won't be waiting on the other side")

never love an anchor - the crane wives ("it's a secret i keep tucked inside my chest/with this heart of mine that's guilty not remorseful/there is love that doesn't have a place to rest/but it would have buried you if it had settled on your shoulders")

sloom - of monsters and men ("the sea said goodbye to the shore/so the sun wouldn't notice/the seaweed that wrapped its/arms around you/the carpet on my cheek/feels like a forest/and i run through the tall trees/with your hand chasing me")

i could have sworn you were dead - dandelion hands ("i could have sworn you were dead/but i saw you in a dream last night/there were flowers growing out of your head/and it made me smile/because they were yellow and red/like the kind that i left on your grave")

love letter from the sea to the shore - delaney bailey ("i think i loved you in another life/where i was the sea/and you were the shore/like the tourist comes back to the beach/i come back to you for more and more and more/cause you hold in my tide/i would die a thousand times/just to see you in another life")

anchor - roland future ("so i am the anchor/and i am the sail/i am the hero and i am the villain/in this fairytale/i am the monster/and i am the sword/i am the reason i suffer/but i am worth fighting for")

the night is an ocean - winter aid ("oh little darling/please let it be/i won't speak of the things you dream/i will say nothing/i will say nothing/nothing at all/summer arrived while you were asleep/the days are sweet and sun fading/i want for nothing/nothing")

by your side - flatsound ("but i don’t want to say goodbye/because it’s safer when i’m by your side/it's safer when i'm by your side/i want to be near you/like i’m meant to")

i bet on losing dogs - mitski ("will you let me baby lose on losing dogs/i know they're losing and i pay for my place/by the ring/where i'll be looking in their eyes when they're down/i wanna feel it/i bet on losing dogs/i always want you when i'm finally fine/how you'd be over me looking in my eyes when i come/someone to watch me die")

in dreams - sierra ferrell ("i hope i'm in your dreams/the way you are in all of my mine/you've got a love so fine/i wish that i could make you mine/won't you sit down/you know i love you honey/and you look so tired/i know it's hard how we're thrown into this life/and one day we must die")

[sleepy-moron]

Byler is endgame starter kit:

So since this tag has blown up since volume one dropped and a bunch of people are new to the madness or are trying to convince other people that this is the direction the show will go in I thought it might be nice to have a post that works as a jumping off point for getting immersed in our little corner of Tumblr

1.

This edit is basically a 50 second thesis on Mike's behavior in volume one and everyone should watch it at least once....@sollody did an incredible job here and I think this is an excellent starting off point for understanding why people believe byler is endgame

2. @beepboop358 has the byler proof master slides available as a Google slides presentation on their account, it's probably one of the most comprehensive outlines of a lot of the really big byler proofs and is absolutely worth a read if you haven't checked it out before

3. Just read everything on the pinned posts for @kaypeace21 and @hawkinsschoolcounselor ..... seriously though, they both post some excellent analysis and their work gets discussed a lot here so it's a good place to read more in depth stuff about byler

4.

By @queerxqueen.... Excellent breakdown of why byler absolutely tracks from a narrative perspective and why m*leven endgame would be character regression for both Mike and El.... another account where basically all of the analysis posts are great and absolutely worth checking out

5. @bluemeetyellow is a fantastic blog to go through if you aren't super fond of reading long blocks of text.....super unique style of pointing out parallels and connections between different scenes and dialogue, absolutely worth a follow

6. @cmollyo does some really helpful compilation posts and reblogs a bunch of excellent content on top of some very cool original content

7.

@ghostgirlinsatin made this post with recommendations for a bunch of blogs that make good byler theory/analysis content so I will be yoinking it because I think it's a pretty good list of blogs to check out and also because I have a garbage memory. Their blog is also just good in general, especially when the doubt™ is at a high.

There are so many other people I could put on here but then I would never finish making a list so a lot of these are blogs who's content has been on my mind a lot lately or accounts that I read when I first got interested in endgame byler......also because 7 is a byler number and I thought it would be funny to keep the list at seven points

[black-paraphernalia]

Weak Black Male Willingly Allowed Alex Stein To Feed Him A Banana During Racial Humiliation -  Phillip Scott Podcast

Ok I have to put a commentary to this post. this was very disturbing!

WHAT THE HELL IS REALLY GOING ON HERE!!!!!

After running across this post I begin to have very deep thoughts about the state of our black people, no not the B1′s but the black people who are still sleep and in a WS euphoria of lies and propaganda. The ones who have not freed their minds so their behinds can follow.

The ones with their head in the sand, will not pick up a book to learn the real history of black people in America and abroad as well as the ancient history of our ancestors; are still not realizing that they are allowed to read now.

I also gave thought to the fact that we as a people have to own our own shit also and stand up to the fool lala we are a part of. There are three adages, 

1 There is two sides to a coin

2 When you know better, you do better.

3 See something - say something (speak on the bad behavior as well also)

In the future we at BP will be doing more post of the other side of the coin - that will emphasize to do better, move better, be better. Stop the madness and fool lala and be B1 first and foremost. 

Also, I came to the sad but truth, that some are still on the plantation of old mentally, the names like coon, racoon, uncle tom, sell out and so on to just name a few - are so rightly deserved for behavior of some black people.

All are doing tumble flips and spinning in their graves, shaking saying we did not fight and die for this behavior - MLK, Malcolm X, Marcus Garvey, Medgar Evers, Frederick Douglas, Fannie Lou Hamer, Ida B. Wells, Rosa Parks, Harriet Tubman, Nelson Mandela, Fred Hampton,Thurgood Marshall, John Lewis, W.E.B. Du Bois, James Baldwin, The Mississippi 3 freedom fighters,Emmett Till, all the black people lynched then and now, all the black people who loss their life due to WS.........This is not by any means an ordered comprehensive list, it is just the names that some come to mind while writing this post, there is a myriad of more names you can add.

We have been marching and wearing paraphernalia that say BLACK LIVES MATTER. but then for some who do not act like their live matter, let alone black lives as a collective. However, until we learn from within our own life matter with respect and dignity, the saying black lives matter will only be a slogan on a tee and not on our hearts and minds.

Phil Scott had a lot to say in his above podcast that step on some toes (as the old folk would say) but he told it like a ti is - take time to listen it a good podcast. *BP*

BLACK PARAPHERNALIA DISCLAIMER - PLEASE READ

[rhodestoruin]

≛ main ≛ bio ≛ face ≛ muse ≛ starters ≛ wishlist ≛

about:

This is a sideblog, and I follow back from my main @grimmusings. Please direct IMs there, since it's easier for me to keep all my messages on one blog. It's also easier to start interactions with me there, where I regularly post open starters and meme prompts. For a full list of rules, see my main. Honesty hour questions will largely be answered IC and treated as anonymous unless signed by a muse.

Rhodey is a mix of Earth-616, MCU, and headcanons, all of them meshed them together for Earth-3490. All details vary based on verse, and I'm happy to write him into AUs and fandom crossovers. His characterization is heavily inspired by The Components of Construction. All post-CW threads in an MCU timeline are written with the faceclaim Gabrielle Union. I do not acknowledge any of the D+ shows in my verses.

wanted connections:

This is by no means a comprehensive list, and I can roll with most muses as far as basic interactions. I'm happy to ship Rhodey with other Marvel characters and OCs/fandom crossovers based on chemistry, but unless they're on my OTP list, they need plotting and interaction first. There is never any pressure to ship with me, even if they're on my list.

OTPs: Carol Danvers, Clint Barton, Tony/Natasha Stark Possible Ships: most Avengers NOTPs: n/a Family: Safe to say he'd love to be the Cool Uncle to all of Tony's various canon and AU children, but given the age difference, this is probably not the Rhodey they grew up with. Other: TONY TONY TONY. Whether it's bros, romance, or platonic soulmates, I'd love all the Tony connections.

default verses:

616: A mix of comics and headcanons where Rhodey and Clint Barton were dating pre-Civil War and chose opposite sides, ending the relationship. As this is not an MCU verse and Vision was not involved, Rhodey wasn't seriously injured.

3490: A blip universe in the comics where Steve Rogers and Natasha Stark are married, and the Avengers' Civil War never happens. I'm most comfortable writing this version of him, so feel free to have your muse playing tourist in his dimension or vice versa, especially if the age is off.

multiverse!madness: Various comics universes collide, whether Marvel/DC/etc. have always existed on the same Earth, or other-dimension shenanigans are at work. Duplicate friendly!

verses by request only:

I'm happy to write these, but since they're more specific AUs, I don't default on them for asks/memes. Please feel free to request them.

alt!3490: A blip universe in the comics where Stephanie Rogers and Natasha Stark are married, and the Avengers' Civil War never happens. (fem!rhodey / fc: vanessa morgan)

alt!postblip: An MCU timeline where Steve Rogers stays in the present timeline, Tony Stark doesn't die, and the snap brings back Natasha Romanoff. Jane Rhodes was paralyzed from the waist down in the Avengers' Civil War and uses Stark tech leg braces to walk. She identifies as homosexual and only ships with female muses. (fem!rhodey / fc: Gabrielle Union)

college!verse: A modern/realistic AU where Rhodey is an engineering and ROTC student at MIT.

[loveskilljoy]

been having some EXSTENSIVE thoughts on runesmith caryll my friend runesmith caryll as of late and feel the need to share with the world. so. quick comprehensive list on hcs for them !

it/they agender + intersex realness first and foremost bc like. cmon youre gonna have a character who’s canonically only referred to by name and not pronouns and expect me not to make them some type of nonbinary?

its like. Shockingly tall but since they slouch 90% of the time people don’t really clock it until it stands up properly. like 6′1 ish

speaks in the third person and also is like. borderline if not completely incomprehensible (its the autism and also the mild eldritch madness) to everyone outside of laurence since i think the two are close (went to byrgenwerth together) and even still sometimes it just says Things

now for a silly one caryll is Currently the Host of Formless Oedon. that sounds fucking deranged but basically i think that while oedon enjoys the freedom that comes from lacking a form, he does also like being able to do certain things he cant as a great one through possession of caryll. its an entirely mutually beneficial thing. like its essentially symbiotic. so oedon gets a fun human form and caryll gets to not die of frenzy bc it gets great one plot armour !!! fun for everyone (this also means that sometimes instead of referring to themselves as caryll it’ll straight up just call itself oedon)

as a weird result of all the insight they’ve gained, its hair has gone completely white and so have their eyes (as in the pupil and iris are white) so it wears a black cloth blindfold over its eyes instead. mostly not to freak people out too much but thats kinda counteracted by their incredibly Strange and Offputting demeanor 

caryll gets everything from prophecies and premonitions (be it through visions or just this inherent knowledge gifted to it) to glimpses of alternate timelines. which. should totally have made it go insane by now but like i said, oedon’s got that covered

when it comes to bad premonitions, as soon as it receives them they’ll often get just awful headaches or will start wailing/clutching their head and babbling about said premonitions and how “oedon cannot tell you what it saw, oedon cannot change what it saw!” due to thinking its not within their right to dictate others’ fate as no singular great one rules over that. they hold a lot of guilt over not being able to tell people of these prophecies and also usually end up bedbound until the prophecy has come to pass 

caryll can talk to other great ones, though not as personally as with oedon. it speaks with ebrietas as well as the great one residing in ludwig’s holy moonlight sword, the name of which caryll says is “ianthe,” but that her (actual) name is not made to be spoken of in a human’s tongue. ludwig is utterly bewildered by the fact another person can hear his fucking sword

[succulent-mud]

R, T, X, Y for the fandom ask please! 💖

HELLO TATATATA, I hope you're having a good day, thanks you for the ask! :D R . A pairing you ship that you don’t think anyone else ships

UH, you got me a little hard on this one.

The thing is that my mind starts working when I finish X series or game. I do not know why but I just rush it into my brain like a rat would rush the last piece of pizza in the New York streets. Then, as if God had enlightened me with knowledge, start.

I don't think the ships I enjoy are, like, no-popular (?). I do remember having a ship between Jay (Marble Hornets) and another character, but I completely forgot about it.

Could we say something about Madness Combat? Yes, but the fandom lives up to his name; everything has a ship already and, in one way or another, is popular. But thanks to you now I have this little worm in my head catching serotonine when I see things of HouTata. /pos (They're lovely)

I do, however, enjoy (ironically) Springtrap x Belos. Best ship ever.

T . Do you have any hard and fast headcanons that you will die defending, about anything at all (gender identity, sexual or romantic orientation, extended family, sexual preferences like top/bottom/switch, relationship with poetry, seriously anything) -THE ASEXUAL HEADCANNON THAT RANDOMLY APPEARS. IT'S LIKE A WAVE OF LITTLE PEOPLE SCREAMING, FAR FAR AWAY BEHIND ME: "Asexual! Asexual! ASEXUAL!" -ANY character with glasses has the dad squints, I will not elaborate but I will fight with swords to anyone who disagree. -Nightmares, heavy, toecurling nightmares.

Many headcanon start like a pop ad, many of them are stupid, there indeed are more AND I FORGET TO WRITE THEM SO I CAN HAVE THEM THERE. X . Top 5-10 characters who are yoUR PRECIOUS BABIES AND YOU WILL DIE DEFENDING THEM PUTTING 5 CHARACTERS BECAUSE FOGGY BRAIN AND DON'T REMEMBER ANYTHING ELSE, ONLY INFORMATION OF WHAT A PROTEIN IS, HOW IT FOLDS, AND WHAT A PROTEASE ARE.

1-Kaneki Ken, Eto (Ofc, ma' two babygirls on the list) 2-Vee, The Collector and Lilith (The Owl House) (They need comprehension and care, precious characters truly, I love them so much) 3-Ralsei (Deltarune) 4-Montomery Gator and Roxxane Wolf (Freddy Fazbear's Mega Pizzaplex) 5-Masky/Timothy Wright and Jay Merrick (Marble Hornets)

Y . What are your secondhand fandoms (fandoms you aren’t in personally but are tangentially familiar with because your friends/people on your dash are in them)

YES YES YES, not so many BUT YES!

-Welcome Home -Chainsawman (I'm kinda more familiar with this one since I see some things here and there pretty often, I like it tho) -Sonic the Hedgehog (We all have individual OC's but I still have no god damn idea of anything from lore nor fandom) -Invader Zim

After that, we share the same braincell and, in one way or another, everyone ends up in the same brainrot the other one is in.

BUT I do remember me showing them Slugterra and Skullgirls, and then me and another friend kinda blasted the other one with a Roblox game.

[m0nopurple]

A moment of the hysterical for your pleasure.

Faint sensations of sizzling spiders echo within the layers of my skin.

There is a great plague sweeping through the decorated halls of my mind, wherein there lay great manicured monuments to the tragedies of which details are unknown. It creeps, with decrepit feet made of bottles of liquor and malice, a face covered with a thick veil of white moonshine. Bodily features are lost in the kerfuffle of a great debonair frilled dress, its plumes and peacock feathers shining enchanted. Long gone. Everpresent. Forevermore?

Poppies litter the gold gilding- red as a child's rosy cheeks. Containing stench of the mortician.

All trembles as the hands fall like gavels from the sky, bathed in the translucence of human skin. Nowhere to run, nowhere to hide, the judgement has arrived. Parents be damned and memories be cindered to ash it calls, opulent in its voice. Worship and fear me as a god, respect me and attempt to disregard me. Your children shall watch the dust fall and weep.

I want.

Thrive with stab wounds. Plunder the opium in our souls and our crime, and inhale the feeling of it all until you die trying. I want to drown and splatter and burn and cough and love and sneeze and murder and reproduce and see how much pain I can inherit and jump off a bridge with only a rope holding me back. To live is to love the process, and to die trying.

And I disregard?

Simple-minded fools who do not understand the serendipity in death. Passionless corpses, pacemaker animals. I hate and I hate and I hate. The eloquent critique is a signal of brilliance and peacefulness within one's self; this says the box cutter who views himself as an army knife. I am grand and I am special it screams in its decrepit box! I am not mad, nor am I hysterical! I am greater than thou, I am the harbinger for the world! Grand and mystical I am, so regard me so those who enslave themselves. The box cutter says this in a decrepit box lined with gold. It is a useless thing, repeating values about the dislike of repetition.

And of the notion that suicide is an option? Yes. It is.

Does opinion matter in the, chamber shaped like a tunnel with blueprints for it as timeless as our conscious minds? The neurons fire in a series of tubes. Pathways are blocked except for the greatest sycophants. Those sycophants that will lick you clean from lips made of 100-dollar bills coiled like snakes to the grime of your underbelly. They love the adrenaline, you see? They love smelling lies. They hate the moon for they believe it is of cheese, and they love to hate those who they describe as their kitchen utensils. Maybe I was too heavy on the object between your eyes there- I apologize. Hatred for the hues separating us, and the identity that should be free comes with the price of this poem, and all that is not streetcars desired is also of the topic. Now pardon me, but I hate clamouring, so let us move on.

Thunderbolts strike us in the brain- God loves us in every way.

He who is, and those who follow- recognition is the grand prize, as well as the whoring of others. So above us all, you are, oh great ones. Let me suck on your toes as you desire, behind the lectern made of stained glass. Please, teach others the great truth of hate and how to make it incarnate. For those who fake it well enough to butcher baby deer in lambs' skin- I applaud the market you exploit. All capitalism is capitalized on, and so you are right about the first to sin not being all too horrid. Throw the stone onto the corpse if you think the mourners will applaud, won't you?

Preference for the start of the story means you hate cognizance. I appreciate the intentions behind it but burn in agony, you, foul thing.

Perhaps if Cain sold the murder and what it lost… This is all for the evil of today.

In the end, this not-so-comprehensive list is of that which I shall shriek for, and perhaps die for. Sizzling spiders have burrowed back in me for another time and place. Who knows? Maybe then I shall also share this with future me?

[theuniverseisdarksometimes]

Here’s a comprehensive list of things that are more important to my boyfriend than I am, in no particular order:

A 64 Chevy Impala (this one is understandable because it’s a gift from his grandfather, but it’s on the list because he admitted to me that if something I did ever somehow ended up in that car being damaged, he would beat me)

A 2013 Fiat 500 (gets unbelievably angry at me if I park less than three feet away from it but blamed me when the door swung and hit my ankle)

A leak in the basement (a very small leak literally doesn’t cause anything but a small puddle on the floor but he canceled an entire trip we had planned because of it)

Sleep (canceled another trip because he didn’t feel like getting up in time to go, but he keeps complaining that we don’t do anything together)

A house built in the early 70′s that’s falling apart (but he refuses to even consider looking into moving so he just keeps getting mad when something goes wrong and we don’t have the money to fix it)

Transformers figurines (I literally dropped one onto a soft blanket while cleaning around and he got genuinely angry over it)

A 2 year old cat (the cat got upset because we found kittens outside and were taking care of them so he started hiding; I was blamed for it because I didn’t want to leave the kittens outside to fucking DIE; bonus points that I was the one who begged him to keep said cat because he wanted to get rid of him for being male)

A bike he bought not even a year ago (he and I have been together for 5 years by the way, he also admitted that he would beat me if I “did anything” to the bike, i.e knocking it over)

A carport (he got mad that I “park too close to it” when I’m literally over a foot away from the edge of it)

Shag carpeting (something something it’s soft so I’m not tearing it out I don’t care if you don’t like it something)

A clock that looks like a tire (it dropped off the wall when I closed a door and he got mad at me about it)

His PS4, Xbox, and laptop (not because they’re expensive or that I’m not allowed to touch them, but he does delete my games if he wants to play something else)

A pocket knife (I don’t get this one, but I’m not allowed to touch it?)

A kid from Texas he met over a video game about two years ago (he flat out ignores me as soon as this kid texts him to play GTA with him.  We can literally be in the middle of a conversation and he’ll drop me for this kid, and by kid I mean he literally turned 18 a few months ago.  My boyfriend is 27.  He calls the kid his son)

A group of random dudes he met on GTA literally a week ago (once again, drops any and all conversation or plans if they get online and want to play)

Our job (we work together and he tries to pull “seniority” on me outside of work if he doesn’t want me to do something; literally belittles me for not taking it seriously.  If I say “I don’t care” to something involving this job, he always hits the “Well I DO” as if that’s going to change my mind.  “Hey I’m gonna do a thing”  “No.”  “I’m gonna do it anyways”  “Well, I’m your Sergeant and I said no.”  Like, pal we aren’t even at work you ain’t SHIT)

[iridescentkippen]

a comprehensive list of the things my friend said while she watched falsettos for the first time last night

- *seeing tracie thoms in the title screen* "pretty girl !!! pretty girl from rent !!!!"

- *talking about anthony* "aww he's so talented!! and so tiny!!!" "oh yeah my fun fact is that i was born four days before him" "....he's older than me?????"

- *pointing at marvin* "he's gay" "....yes babes that's the whole point of the show"

- "ten months nine months ten months" "you know this one" "yeah it came up on my spotify !!!"

- *at the end of thrill of first love* "well we all know what they did next" "aYOOO"

- *me talking about christian* "oh yeah he's not gay irl" "hE'S NOT??? he is a gOOd actor"

- "babes did you know he was king george?" "wAIT THAT MAKES SENSE"

- "are you sure he [christian] isn't queer?"

- *marv at the psych ends* "aw, that was a nice one" "...my fathers a homo, my mother's not thrilled at all" *she proceeds to choke on her pizza*

- "did that just say my father's a hobo???" "no a homo" "oHHHH"

- "you can't say the word homo about someone else it's basically a slur"

- "i like the kid. he's a girlboss"

- "he [andrew] looks like mark wahlberg !!" ".....no?"

- "i don't like when black stache yells at everyone"

- *after being silent for all of i'm breaking down* "wow"

- *at the beginning of march of the falsettos* "what in the fresh hell is going on" "oh i probably should've explained"

- "wait no come back wait no don't kick him out !!!!! chess was not that important !!!!! come back !!!!! no !!! stop !!! black stache pls let mark wahlberg stick around"

- *quietly crying next to me during the games i play*

- "i'm mad at you for making me watch a sad musical"

- "why he [jason] blinkin so much ayo sir"

- *at the end of act one* "how do you feel so far?" "i like it but where is pretty girl one and pretty girl two it was advertised to me that there were pretty lesbians"

- "where are the pretty girls?" "isn't trina a pretty girl?" "well,,,, yeah but where are the other pretty girls???" "they only show up in act two it's called a princess track" "tHEY'RE PRINCESSES???"

- "hold on i need more pizza i don't think i'll get through act two without more energy"

- "babes it's lesbian time" *with pizza in her mouth* "leSBIAN TIME !!"

- "ew the regans"

- *going absolutely feral when the lesbians come on stage*

- *during year of the child* "where's pretty boy" "they broke up remember" "well then they BETTER GET BACK TOGETHER !!"

- *when whizzer shows up at the baseball game* "pretty boy is back !!! he's very pretty...too bad he's gay" "......and 43" "...and?"

- "they're getting back together :)))))))))))"

- "this is great i love this everything is good in the world"

- "god had parents?"

- "oh my god they're nAKED"

- "i don't think i'd ever wanna be that close to someone. people are just too toxic nowadays...no i'm not ace"

- *whispered* "do they have underwear on?"

- "are you sURE he [christian] is straight? that's v close to a man to be straight" "buddy some people are just good actors"

- "something bad is happening??? L"

- "wait is someone gonna die"

- "wait when does this take place........iS THIS THE AIDS CRISIS TOO????????"

- "if one of them dies i swear to god"

- "does one of them have aids?"

- *singing along to more raquetball* "1, 2, 3, hhh" "how do you know this?" "it came up on my spotify randomly !!!! i didn't know what it meant out of context"

- *whizzer collapses* "oh no... oh no no no no no no this is not okay caroline i didn't sign up for this"

- "wait didn't they just say everything would be alright???? .........was that a lie >:(("

- *whispering* "is weezer gonna die?" "whizzer" "huh?" "weezer is a band...his name is whizzer"

- *during holding to the ground* "......is she dying? no just him right?" "yes angela trina is not dying"

- *sitting next to me silently with a perpetual frown on her face*

- "why am i scared he's gonna die right now [during unlikely lovers]" "i promise you he does not die right now"

- "does he [jason] know what a psychiatrist is??? they're not a magician they just listen to your problems"

- "GO TO THERAPY !!!!"

- "something bad is happening :(("

- "wait.....something... something BAD is happening????? IS HE DYING TOO????"

- *grumbling under her breath* "i hate it here"

- *during jason's bar mitzvah* "are they both gonna die right now"

- "wait no he can't die right now i was joking !!!! whizzer stop this isn't funny !!!!"

- "tHANKS????? ALL HE SAID WAS THANKS???"

- *sobbing violently next to me*

- "it's kinda like the end of hamilton...how eliza sings with alex's ghost???? marvin is singing with whizzer's ghost"

- "this isn't nice. i don't like this anymore"

- "NO NOT THE CHESS PEICE ON THE GRAVESTONE" *sobbing onto my shoulder* "HE LET HIM WIN"

- "caroline that was evil......but it was so good :'))))))"

- "...........are you sure that marvin's actor isn't queer?" "YES I'M SURE"

[finalgirlbrainrot]

sam and victim blaming

inspired by this post, because sam getting victim blamed for one reason or another has been a consistent pattern since s1 and I wanted to make a comprehensive list of all the examples I can think of. if you can think of other examples, please let me know

dean blaming him for john's abuse "maybe he had to raise his voice a few times, but you were out of line" (1x08)

john making excuses for the way he treats him and blaming it on him "walking away" (1x20)

john trying to split the blame for their failed relationship between both of them (2x01)

dean putting the blame for sam and john's failed relationship on sam (2x02)

dean telling sam that he has something evil inside him because he was force-fed demon blood as a six months old infant (4x04)

s5 is literally the Victim Blame Extravaganza with everyone and their mom blaming him for being taken advantage of and tricked into breaking the last seal and for ruby's manipulation

war being like "addiction makes you evil" and sam agreeing with him and saying that the problem isn't the demon blood or ruby, it's him (5x02)

one of the hunters who tried to force-feed him demon blood saying "come on, you know you want to it" and "there, was that really so bad?" (this scene is already plain awful and has extremely rapey vibes, so those lines just makes it even more disturbing) (5x03)

the wraith-nurse telling him that he's far too angry to be out there in the real world (5x11)

sam saying that he doesn't understand why he's angry at john, lilith and lucifer, even tho he has more than enough reasons to be angry at all three of them (5x11)

dean victim blaming and shaming him for wanting to escape an abusive environment and because his heaven didn't include memories of his horrible home life (5x16)

brady blaming him for being manipulated by azazel's minions and ruby (5x20)

dean getting mad at him because of his hallucinations (7x02)

dean blaming sam's mental illness for him lying about amy's murder and for almost getting them killed (7x07)

sam apologizing for being mad about amy's murder (7x07)

hallucifer saying that he can't get rid of him because he let him in / wanted him (7x15)

dean saying that he wouldn't have manipulated him with the amelia text if sam just trusted him (8x10)

dean's list of sam's sins "ruby, killing lilith, letting lucifer out, losing your soul" (8x23)

sam getting blamed for the apocalypse for the 816482th time (9x02)

the aftermath of the gadreel possession aka the Victim Blame Extravaganza 2.0. I'm not even gonna list all the examples because there are literally too many to count, but mainly every single character telling him to get over it, dean demanding that he get over it without even offering an apology or acknowledging that what he did was wrong, dean getting mad at him for saying he wouldn't do the same thing to him, etc...

demon!dean's grossly victim blamey speech about how everything wrong in his life is sam's fault (10x03)

dean's whole speech while trying to convince him that he deserved to die to fix dean's own mess (10x23)

toni asking him if it was good for him after mind raping him via spell (12x02)

dean blaming sam for him lying about jack's death and saying that it's because he knew sam couldn't handle it (15x16)

I wanted to keep this list pertinent to instances that happened in the show without including fandom stuff, because otherwise the list would've been endless, but I have to include this one: people getting mad at sam for his speech in 8x23 and turning it into him emotionally manipulating dean and not wanting dean to have any friends, when he's literally suicidal as a result of dean spending a season guilt tripping him, putting him down and verbally and emotionally abusing him

[olreid]

I apologize if you've answered something like this before but I'd love to hear any time loop story recommendations you have if you're up for sharing?:) hope your day goes well! 🌳🌷

alright boys this is where i have to come clean and admit to having basically not watched any of the classic time loop movies, not even groundhog day. i have migraine madness and think films are too long disease and i will NOT apologize! also i didn't really even like time loop as a trope until very recently? i think it's very rarely done well because it's either like. presented as a comedy even though the very idea is horrifying, or it leans SUPER far into the horror in a way that is simply not enjoyable to engage with. however, i am now a time loop TRUTHER and am very interested in time loop as product of trauma / source of trauma / method of healing from trauma. so while this is not by any means a definitive or comprehensive list, here r some of my time loop media faves:

russian doll: a MUST WATCH ! a video game developer is trapped in a glitch with someone she's never met. why have they been thrown together? how can they escape the day they're stuck in? the answer WILL make you weep!

honorable mention pynch russian doll au fic my beloved which honestly is where my time loop interest began <3

the raven cycle: two characters are trapped in the very moment of their death, though they show it differently. people who die wake up again after hundreds of years; excavations reveal remains too recently manufactured to have been buried for so long; when something is going wrong, the clock always reads 6:21.

the locked tomb trilogy: i can't explain this one without spoiling it but you simply MUST trust me here. peak time loop as trauma response and ghost soup. i am just typing words at this point

my secret reading of moby dick where ishmael is trapped in an authorial loop and can't stop retelling the story of the pequod and that's why random chapters are in stage directions and why he stalls for so long with whale facts before getting to the fate of the crew and mr. moby dick

hadestown: every play is a time loop if we're being real but this play is a time loop that is self-aware <3 IT'S A SAD SONG / BUT WE'RE GONNA SING IT AGAIN! stream her on spotify

ghost quartet: i honestly can't explain the mechanics of this one because it's like. time loop soup. just time loops all the way down. but if you are interested in circular storytelling i think u will enjoy

the adventure zone balance, specifically the eleventh hour arc; it's a western-inspired arc in which the pc's get sent into a town where "time is sick" and it keeps repeating the same day over and over again and they have to figure out how to put things right, but ALSO [stuff about the meta plot redacted for spoiler reasons and also bc it makes me TOO crazy]

on my list to explore: palm springs, next to normal, stay? by e. jade lomax, hades, whatever all my smart friends suggest in the replies <3