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weirdowithaquill · 1 month

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Let's Talk About Rebecca:

Well, I said we needed to talk about Rebecca, and here we are.

To begin with, I would like to preface this with a simple disclaimer: I am in no way telling people to like or dislike the version of Rebecca found in BWBA, but instead looking into what caused such a deep disdain for this character, one that lasted long after Henry had been departed and was fuelled not by her position as a ‘replacement’, but rather by the series itself. This is not a dissertation on why Henry is a stronger character and why Rebecca should never have been introduced - that is counterproductive and, in some ways, false. This is instead something adjacent to an essay in which I will focus on how Rebecca’s flawed introduction, characterisation and tenure in the series both represents the BWBA era as a whole, but also what led to her being notably absent from All Engines Go, the reboot of Thomas and Friends. This will be followed by me attempting to redesign her characterisation and create an alternate version of Rebecca, one which in my opinion would have done far better for herself in the series.

Part 1: Who is Rebecca, and Why Her Characterisation Doesn't Work:

According to the former official Thomas and Friends website, Rebecca is: “...a very cheerful and happy engine. She is painted a sunshine yellow which reflects her positive outlook on life. Rebecca always sees the best in others and enjoys helping everyone around her feel good about themselves. Despite her warm nature, Rebecca is not afraid to stand up for herself or her friends. She is a big, strong tender engine who is not intimidated by the more experienced engines on the railway. Rebecca is the number 22 engine.”

Already, there is a major issue here: her characterisation is a strange amalgamation of others, who could probably just as easily take on her roles without really breaking any of the episodes she is in. “Cheerful and happy” are characteristics held by Ryan, Stanley, Whiff, Thomas, Percy, Edward, Mavis, Peter Sam; the list goes on. There are already far too many engines whose main qualities are cheerful and happy. She is painted yellow - like Molly and Flora were, or if we go further back, like Jock, Pip and Emma were. “Sees the best in others” was once upon a time a quality unique to Edward, as well as Salty. “Enjoys helping everyone around her feel good about themselves” sounds way too close to what Emily has become in the series, without mentioning the evolutions of Mavis’ character or Rocky’s character. If we add in her clumsiness and shyness, we get Kevin and Molly respectively - and Kevin is also yellow! She isn’t intimidated nor does she have any trouble at all with fending off engines who want to be mean to her. She isn’t unique here either: Duck did this when he first arrived, and he had a much bigger and more notable impact because of how he acted when confronted with the big engines' attitudes. What all this really means is that Rebecca has already finished a character arc at some point in the past and does not need to grow further.

And here we reach the crux of the problem with Rebecca in BWBA: she has nowhere for her character to grow into - something all the other main characters have done decades ago. This is especially problematic at this late stage in the show; Thomas & Friends has been running since 1984, and almost every character they pair Rebecca up with has had an exceptionally long time to bed themselves in and grow into the space they occupy. For Rebecca to compete, and truly qualify for her status as a main character, her character needs to make its own space - and importantly, make that space bigger than as many other characters as possible. This is a running problem in the TV series post Season 7, and something that really baked itself into the show by the time the series reached CGI: the characters do not develop. The Steam Team (bar Emily) hasn’t had any real, natural character developments since the Mitton era - not any sustained over multiple seasons, at least. If we go back to the Classic series - or further back to the Railway Series - we find that the very essence of Thomas is in its strong characters and their natural growth. Gordon grows into being more humble, Edward and Henry grow more confident in themselves, Thomas and Percy mature and (to some extent) learn their limits - the list goes on. There are characters that do not grow as much or remain the same, yes - but they still have some sort of character arc where the essence of them as a character is tested.

Rebecca does not undergo character growth in the series, and her character itself is not tested in any meaningful way. Instead, she is overused and underutilised - by which I mean, she appears constantly throughout the series but is given nothing to define her as being any different to any of the characters mentioned above. Worse yet, Rebecca’s leads are easily interchangeable with any other Steam Team member, and this further complicates her. Rebecca takes trucks perfectly - like Donald or Douglas would, or perhaps Edward? Rebecca is too fast and leaves passengers behind - like Peter Sam did to the refreshment lady. And when she causes all kinds of delay, is that not like James did way back in Series 3? And she’s tricked by Diesel… like almost every single engine in the entire series, going as far back as Gordon, Henry and James were in Series 2.

Would it have been better to divide Rebecca’s leads up and give other, more established engines more spotlight? Probably. Her personality is similar to a number of others, and her introduction is basically a mix and mash of older episodes - notably the eighth series episode, Thomas and the Tuba, the tenth series episode, Seeing the Sights, the first series episode, Thomas' Train, and the fourth series episode, Peter Sam and the Refreshment Lady. This really doesn’t help to define her, especially when all fans think about when they watch the episode is what other, older episode it is most like. Her subsequent appearances do very little to endear her either, both due to the lack of effort put in by Mattel to ground Rebecca in the series and the low impact of the episodes she does star in. Characters like Oliver or Duke have had lasting impacts on the fandom despite their short tenures because their episodes have high impact. Duck is one of the most popular characters in the fandom of this show, despite having been a secondary character ever since Series 5, and being practically absent from the series between Series 8 and Series 16.

Rebecca also takes up a difficult spot as a replacement for Henry, which complicates her relationship with a large portion of the fandom, meaning a lot of her as a character is questioned in relation to what Henry would have done. While technically, Rebecca was slated as a replacement to Edward, her arrival coincides with Henry’s departure, and thus for the purposes of this, we will consider her to have taken the position Henry had, similarly to Nia and Edward. Whether or not Henry’s departure from the main cast is a bad thing is an issue unto itself, which dives into character assassination and to what extent the Henry seen in Season 21 is the same Henry seen in Season 1. In either case, Rebecca’s roles could have quite easily been filled by Henry or another standing character, and her characterisation is too similar to other, pre-existing characters to make her stand out amongst her costars and their longer, more notable characterisations and character growths.

Much of this is compounded by how Rebecca was introduced and integrated into the main cast, which is clearly seen when compared with another notable case of an engine joining the Steam Team after it had been first codified: Emily.

Part 2: Rebecca vs Emily - How to Introduce a Main Character:

Rebecca’s introduction is extremely underwhelming, especially for a Steam Team member. Thomas and Gordon shared the very first episode, Edward established himself as a foil to Gordon in his introduction and in Henry’s first appearance, he is bricked up in a tunnel in perhaps one of the series’ most infamous and iconic episodes. James makes his grand entrance by crashing into a field, Percy nearly gets destroyed by Gordon and Toby tugs on the viewer’s heartstrings as we watch him lose his entire livelihood. Moving forward several seasons, Emily’s introduction includes her saving another engine from a terrible accident - and then lastly, Nia gets an entire movie to embed her. Rebecca just bumbles about for ten minutes and takes the final shed at Tidmouth.

To make matters worse, Henry’s departure is equally low-intensity. Edward at least got a full episode; Henry got a single line, used to further Gordon’s character as opposed to finalising Henry’s arc and introducing Rebecca’s. And while Gordon’s character here is interesting and new and possibly the first real growth we’ve seen from any of the Steam Team since Henry, Toby and Percy regressed into children before CGI even began; it does nothing to create a satisfactory conclusion to Henry’s arc or properly build up Rebecca’s arrival. This ultimately undermines Rebecca’s position as a primary character in the series, where she has joined far too late in the series to make an impact without dedicated time and effort being put into her.

We are expected to accept that Rebecca has simply arrived and is now a main character by the show without any reasoning behind this. There is no connection between the viewer and Rebecca to justify this promotion to main character status, and it is telling. The writers don’t have anything new or unique to say about Rebecca either and it reflects in her episodes, which are remixes of old episodes or bland and unoriginal. This is especially painful in an era when so much of the writing is like this, bar the few episodes that really manage to break through the white noise. Ironically, two of the episodes that do really stand out have Edward and Toby as main characters respectively.

In contrast, Emily is very well introduced to her position and has a long, notable character arc that plays out across both the Classic and HiT eras to cement her as a main character before making her a permanent member of the Steam Team - a journey that endeared her to fans and helped to build her characterisation to make her unique and interesting. Emily is first introduced in Season 7, where she has a strong introductory story played out against Thomas where she steals Annie and Clarabel and then rescues Oliver from a nasty accident. I’m not entirely certain, but this might be the first time that an engine takes Annie and Clarabel without asking - prior to this, Percy and Duck both got permission or it wasn’t mentioned. And after this episode, Emily does not immediately move into Tidmouth Sheds - she remains at Knapford, despite having further notable appearances across the rest of the season.

What is made apparent in Season 7 is her characterisation. Emily is brave and bossy, but kind-hearted. She doesn’t headline constantly either, instead playing off other characters and rolling into the background when needed. She slots naturally into a secondary role in this season and feels like an engine who belongs on the NWR. Season 7 introduces Emily to viewers and gives her characterisation to back up her unique appearance. Season 8 continued this trend, building on her more and pairing her up with different engines to settle her comfortably into being a proper presence on the island - notice how it’s an evolution over two seasons? By Calling All Engines, Emily is a main character by virtue of her cementing herself into the cast, and her berth at Tidmouth feels like a natural progression of her story, firmly planting Emily as a Steam Team member. By Season 11, she is being used as a primary character to bounce newbies like Whiff off of!

When considering Emily and Rebecca, two takeaways make themselves known: firstly, that characters need time and effort to be cemented in the story, especially when introduced long after most other central characters have had time to imbed themselves; and secondly that characters need strong, interesting differences when compared to those they share the screen with in order to fill unfilled positions. Emily is brave and bossy, giving her a unique style that makes her work great either as the protagonist or antagonist of a story. It gives her character flexibility - she can either be the engine that the protagonist is paired up with to learn something from or it can make her big-headed and in need of being taught a lesson of her own, one which she will - in her own way - try and pass on. We don’t meet someone with a truly bossy personality like Emily’s again until Bradford, and even then it isn’t the same. Bradford is used as a comedic character, whereas Emily’s bossiness was treated seriously.

In comparison, Rebecca’s characterisation causes her to fade where she needs to shine. By being given a personality that has already been used consistently in Thomas, she fails to have a lasting impact and the abruptness of her introduction and elevation to the Steam Team is jarring and gives older viewers no reason to be interested in her. When combining this with the few defining qualities she has, it is equally hard for Rebecca to intrigue new viewers, making her feel bland and unoriginal when compared to many of the characters she shares the screen with. Rebecca is asked to attempt and hold her own against characters who have been intentionally woven together by the series for decades - and as explained above, this is not an impossible feat. It is not an impossible feat in the CGI series either, as Hiro, Paxton and Marion have all managed to stand out in an era when characters very rarely got much character building beyond their introduction. Unfortunately, Rebecca is given none of the same care, and it is reflected in how little she is used. Despite appearing more often as the seasons continue, she gets fewer leads to the point where she has an equal number of leads to Toby in the final season.

Emily and Rebecca are two sides of the same coin in terms of introduction, both first appearing in an episode rather than a movie and then becoming members of the main cast - the difference is that where Rebecca was shunted in and thus the writers were unsure how to use her, Emily’s careful character-building and integration into the series ensured she would always have fans, something that is reflected in her being given a proper conclusion to her character arc in Series 24, where she is given the number twelve and thus immortalised in the same way that Thomas through to Oliver were.

Considering the above issues, it becomes quite clear that the potential best way to introduce Rebecca and have audiences become invested in her and her story is not to simply drop her into the series, but rather to build her up slowly, similarly to Emily - which was entirely possible and plausible.

Part 3: What Could Have Been:

If we assume that Mattel was fixated on Rebecca having her canon characterisation as well as the BWBA series, there is still an entirely plausible method that could naturally build her character into the main cast, though it is underpinned by the original intent of the showrunners to have her introduced in Series 21 and replace Edward:

In Series 21, Rebecca is introduced and shown to be clumsy but kind. In keeping with the original episode, she messes up the express and gets in trouble, however she then redeems herself by rescuing Gordon when he breaks down with the express. She is shown to be clumsy but kind, and gets the lead in a couple of episodes, as well as several minor roles. Preferably, she stars in at least one episode with Thomas specifically. At the same time, audiences are introduced to Henry’s dilemma surrounding whether or not he should sleep at Tidmouth - be it cause of the Kipper, arguments with Gordon, or whatever. This both places Rebecca into audiences’ minds while simultaneously opening up the question of whether or not Henry will remain at Tidmouth. Edward leaves, but the shed remains open - this is filled by Nia.

Continuing in this vein, in Series 22, Rebecca gets a couple more episodes than last season, specifically with both primary and notable secondary characters - I’m talking Duck, Oliver, Rosie, Daisy, Ryan - characters who are popular, relevant to the series and allows the series to cement her as a main addition to the cast. This is to cement her and give her plenty of characters to bounce off and develop relationships with. Meanwhile, Henry’s arc comes to a conclusion and Henry quits Tidmouth in the last episode of the season, leaving it open. This also allows the creators to build up Gordon’s reaction to Henry leaving, showing his struggle to adapt to Edward’s absence and his simmering disdain towards Nia for replacing Edward before the 23rd season.

Finally, in Series 23, Rebecca takes the empty berth at Tidmouth, replacing Henry and kickstarting an episode - or preferably two, but this is Mattel, so it is likely to be one - where Rebecca is forced to withstand the brunt of Gordon’s anger as he boils over, being compared to Henry before proving herself. This plants her firmly as a main character, while also potentially giving her a strong reason to become close friends with Nia - who also had to deal with Gordon’s stubbornness. Henry is given a proper farewell arc as well, allowing him to gracefully retire to his secondary character status.

By arranging Rebecca’s arrival over several seasons, she is given time to fall naturally into her position and role, developing slowly and making the connections with other characters needed to cement her position on the NWR before taking centre-stage. This would also help writers learn how to write her, creating a scenario where Rebecca has a real chance of taking off as a character and potentially even getting similar stories to Emily where she is the lead main character who is used to introduce new characters - like how Emily interacted with Whiff in the eleventh season. This would also help viewers to understand who Rebecca is and get comfortable with her presence in the show before being asked to accept her as a member of the Steam Team.

However, I still feel like her characterisation is weak in comparison to other Steam Team members - as mentioned previously, her clumsiness has been done by several characters including Kevin and Percy, who is a fellow Steam Team member. Her “Cheerful and Happy” characterisation has been used by far too many characters to count - including Percy, Peter Sam, Derek, Stanley and more recently Ryan - and not even her bright yellow paintwork makes her unique in terms of the series, seeing as Molly and Flora both had similarly bright shades of yellow for paintwork back in the model series. Moreover, her leads place her in relatively generic situations where other characters likely would have produced far more interesting plotlines, such as Molly easily pulling trucks despite being built for expresses or James trying to prove he can still pull the express and getting into trouble. Based on this, a complete overhaul of Rebecca’s characterisation is needed.

Part 4: How to Redevelop Rebecca as a Character:

When designing a Thomas and Friends character, one of the first things required is a real-life basis - and Rebecca was given a very interesting and unique basis that had the potential to give her very interesting stories. Rebecca is a Bulleid Light Pacific, in particular an unrebuilt West Country Class. These were strong, powerful mixed traffic Pacifics used by the Southern Railway from 1945 until 1967, giving them a lifetime of about 22 years. They were praised for their free steaming, excellent boilers, and had a number of notable innovations for British steam - including welded fireboxes and frames, as opposed to the traditional, riveted system. The class was also well-known for their availability, being able to pull trains on almost every line that the Southern Railway had.

In contrast, the class was also very famous for their flaws. Remember, Rebecca is an unrebuilt West Country Class, which had many of the same problems and flaws as their larger Merchant Navy Class relatives. These issues would plague the three Bulleid Pacific classes to such an extent that many of them were rebuilt by British Railways in the 1950s into a more conventional design which utilised the strengths of the class while altering or replacing many of the issues that Bulleid built into the engines as he used them as a testing bed for some of his more modern ideas. In particular, the major problems with the West Country Class were:

Adhesion problems: the lighter load on their driving axles meant that they were even more prone to wheelslip than the larger Merchant Navy class, requiring very careful control when starting a heavy train - there are several surviving videos of these engines struggling to start a train due to their wheelslip.

High fuel consumption - these engines were hungry, and this was in many ways highlighted during the 1948 locomotive exchanges where the West Country Class burnt 13.5 kg/km as opposed to the 9.02 kg/km of the T9 class that they replaced - for reference, the West Country Class’ coal consumption is comparable to the Gresley A1 Pacifics prior to the exchange trials of 1925 - a number which was dropped to roughly 10 kg/km after they were modified into the A3 class.

Restricted driver visibility due to the air-smoothed casing and soft steam exhaust from the multiple-jet blastpipe. The exhaust problem was never adequately resolved, and smoke continued to beat down onto the casing while moving, obscuring the driver's vision.

Maintenance problems: the chain-driven valve gear proved to be expensive to maintain and subject to rapid wear, which was particularly problematic during the Post War period, as British Rail focused on availability rather than high quality maintenance.

Leaking: leaks from the oil bath onto the wheels caused oil to splash onto the boiler lagging. Once saturated with oil, the lagging attracted coal dust and ash, which provided combustible material, and sparks from heavy braking would set the lagging on fire underneath the air-smoothed casing. The fires were also attributed to oil overflowing from axlebox lubricators onto the wheels when stationary, to be flung upwards into the boiler lagging in service. In either case, the local fire brigade would be called to put the fire out, with cold water coming into contact with the hot boiler causing stress to the casings, meaning these un-rebuilt locomotives would have warped casings, the result of a lagging fire!

All of these strengths and flaws tell a notable story about the kind of engine Rebecca may have been in real life: an engine with extremely good power and speed, but with difficulty at slow speeds and design issues that could have dangerous and rather embarrassing unintended consequences. This is a brilliant basis for a character, and it really irks me how little of all of this characterisation gold that Mattel ended up using - while it is consistent with how they treat their newer characters, it is also a real shame. Especially considering that from all of this, it is really not hard to build a genuinely interesting character that wouldn’t feel too out of place in the Railway Series or Classic series.

Firstly, based on the high coal consumption and severe maintenance and wheelslip issues, we can suggest that Rebecca is a bit clumsy and worries about how others perceive her. Her class was large enough for this to be less apparent back on the Southern, but perhaps she was one of the worst for it, so she was teased mercilessly - and so after having moved to Sodor, she fears how the other engines will treat her. To cover for these insecurities, Rebecca acts standoffish or gruff, wanting to keep the other engines at a distance so they can’t find out about her flaws and tease her for them - already very different from her original characterisation, but far more interesting as it makes her one of the few new NWR engines to actively try and push both steam and diesel engines away. Furthermore, her excellent steaming abilities and fast speeds in service could translate into Rebecca being somewhat reckless or a speed demon, wanting to use her strengths to both hide her weaknesses and as something she enjoys. Rebecca has an air-smoothed casing, and it may help her feel the wind better at speed, like Spencer with his streamlining. Quite simply, by using her basis as a starting-point for her personality, building up character-traits from strengths and flaws of the class, we can construct an interesting and different characterisation that draws people in, similarly to how the Reverend Awdry did with his eight famous engines. Better yet, it means that once the other characters crack open this more standoffish side to Rebecca, we can still see the kind and clumsy Rebecca from the TVS, but it feels more natural and rewarding to go through a journey to get there and if it’s directed only to her close friends, while also meaning that we the audience can still see her gruff side when dealing with unknowns or characters she dislikes.

There is also the fact that by considering her class basis, show writers can find interesting stories or take other issues with Rebecca’s class to incorporate into her personality. For example, the low-visibility created by the air-smoothed casing could translate into eyesight problems for Rebecca that she tries to hide because she fears engines would tease her for them, potentially culminating in Rebecca passing a red signal and getting into a crash. Maybe she doesn’t like fire or hates the works because of bad memories, meaning Rebecca hides any mechanical faults until they cause her to break down on the main line.

By building her character around her class basis, we can develop an alternative personality for Rebecca that naturally stands strongly around other engines - especially as there are very few other Southern Railway engines on Sodor who could see Rebecca’s gruff and cold attitude as the defence mechanism it is. It also gives Rebecca a strong connection to Henry, who acted practically the same when he first arrived on Sodor to hide his steaming problems, making him sympathetic to Rebecca and opening the two up to a long-term arc that ends with Henry having helped Rebecca grow into the happy, cheerful and clumsy engine from the series before leaving. Her recklessness could translate into a rivalry or competition with Gordon, who is far more responsible and meticulous with his express due to his experience and the pressure that has been put on him.

However, this is not the only way to build a better characterisation for Rebecca, the other option being to make Rebecca into a foil for other main characters.

Part 5: Rebecca as a Foil:

The other way to build Rebecca’s character into something that flows naturally with the other, previously introduced Steam Team members with making her more unique and interesting is to build it around the concept of the foil character. A foil character is a character who contrasts with another character, typically contrasting with the protagonist - a strong example of foil characters are Edward and Gordon, or Thomas and Diesel 10. Rebecca could quite easily fall into the position of being a strong foil character to the three big engines, more specifically James and Gordon, who are without a solid foil character to be contrasted against since Edward’s departure. In BWBA, when Nia arrived, she was considered to be closer to Thomas and Percy than Gordon or James, leaving them without a natural opposite. Rebecca has all of the strengths and weaknesses to fill this role.

For the first option, using the personality the series gives Rebecca, we get the following scenario: Rebecca arrives on Sodor and is both an express engine and a mixed-traffic engine. When she arrives, instead of fumbling her first Express badly, she succeeds, and James and Gordon become worried about their status and jealous of her high speeds. Remember, prior to the codification of the characters into one or two jobs by CGI, James was a common replacement for Gordon on the express, and having his role as secondary express engine threatened would be a major blow to his ego. Worse yet, Rebecca likes pulling trucks, and is thus both similar but also a complete narrative opposite to the pair. Other engines like her for her kindness and helpfulness, even if it does get her in trouble when she doesn’t get her own work done on time - which Gordon and James exploit to make rude remarks about her.

Already, Rebecca is a natural foil for Gordon and James, being similar enough for viewers to compare one to the other while also being different enough that her positive traits are highlighted against their negative ones.

Then, Gordon could discover her hidden clumsiness and wheelslip problems, exploiting them to cause her embarrassment - something that has previously happened to James and when Rebecca is reprimanded for the resulting incident, he remembers his own struggles with wheelslip. This makes him more sympathetic to both Rebecca and the audience, and places him on a path towards apologising to Rebecca for how he spoke to her - while Gordon enjoys having the express to himself again. This could follow naturally towards an endpoint where Gordon gets his comeuppance and Rebecca is accepted into the Steam Team, having been a natural foil to both and developed close character relationships based on how she is positioned in contrast to Gordon and James. The series then progresses to seeing Rebecca act in opposition to the pair, as well as trying to one-up them, being either the protagonist or antagonist depending on who the hero of the story is.

The second option is to use the character made for Rebecca in the previous part - the one built out of her basis and its issues - to turn Rebecca into a strong foil to Gordon and Henry, as well as potentially to Diesel or Thomas. This would begin with Rebecca arriving and acting recklessly with the express, being a speed demon where Gordon demands professionalism due to his experience. This startles CGI Henry, who is also not a fan of recklessness and places her at odds with them but also potentially makes her interesting to James, who is himself quite reckless. Furthermore, Rebecca’s standoffish behaviour and grandstanding alienates engines like Thomas or Percy, while being very similar to how Gordon, Henry and James acted during their younger years, forcing the three to be confronted with how they used to act, reminding them of their old selves (BWBA is so obsessed with flashbacks and dream sequences, so this would be a good opportunity for them to use classic series moments to help flesh out all three and Rebecca here).

This could build into Henry recognising the traits he used to hide his insecurities before he was rebuilt, helping to shift how the audience sees Rebecca and giving Henry an arc where he helps Rebecca learn to trust other engines and accept friendships - though notably not Gordon and James, who she sees as being the most likely to make fun of her. This helps Henry gain his classic series confidence back, giving him a boost to stand up and tell the Fat Controller that he wants to move, as well as the confidence to push back against Gordon when the big engine gets angry about the change. The series then follows Rebecca as she argues with James and Gordon, with engines taking sides depending on the episode - including Thomas potentially absolutely hating Rebecca due to his alliance and friendship with Gordon.

Finally, Rebecca’s actions and attitude could help spur Diesel into recognising some of these negative traits in himself, finally ending the character arc that was attempted with Springtime for Diesel.

Both of these options really focus on taking these established characters and growing them using Rebecca’s characterisation and unique position as the new big engine at Tidmouth, while also building off of Rebecca’s character strengths to make her stand out as unique too. Remember, Rebecca is the same size and strength as Gordon - the series hasn’t seen a NWR engine of comparable size to Gordon since Hiro was introduced, and he was neither an express engine nor a candidate for the Steam Team, so he was never a credible threat to Gordon. And before Hiro, the last engine of that size was Murdoch right the way back in Series 7, who never made it beyond the model series era. Rebecca has a real potential to be this threat to Gordon, being the first engine of such size introduced in almost a decade - she can pull express trains as well as Gordon while showing up James and being mixed-traffic and versatile like Henry. This is what irks me - Rebecca had everything going for her before she debuted, and got none of it.

What is even more painful is the fact that there are an infinite number of ways to further develop and build her character or other characterisations to give her that take inspiration from the source material while still being fresh and interesting - for example, what if Rebecca’s clumsiness came from her being a static exhibit, possibly one at a children’s theme park which would explain the bright colours. She could be so kind and cheerful as a way to handle the pain of watching her siblings be scrapped - something that she could bond with Oliver over. The point is that Rebecca had and still has potential but needs a lot more effort put into her than what she got in canon.

Part 6: Characters to Pair off with Rebecca:

This brings me to my final core part to this long, and slightly ridiculous dissertation: who to pair Rebecca up with to best build her character and insert her into this universe while feeling natural and potentially giving them some more screen time and character dynamics outside of their usual social circles.

For this, I decided not to look at Gordon, Henry or James, seeing as they got a lot of consideration in the previous parts, where they were core components of building up Rebecca’s character while also naturally removing Henry from the Steam Team. The following ten characters are engines who I feel would be some of the most interesting to pair up with Rebecca earlier on in the series, to help her bed into the series and give a wide range of popular or interesting characters for viewers to connect her to:

1: Rosie: Rosie is a USATC s100, a class that worked at Southampton when Rebecca would have been in service! These two potentially have history, and even if they don’t, Rosie would be one of the first engines to realise why Rebecca is acting so standoffish and breaks through to her, seeing as she would have known the class from her younger days. Maybe they become confidants once Rosie manages to break through Rebecca’s facade? Maybe Rebecca decides she prefers Vicarstown and we go back to the Classic-era ensemble cast? The opportunities here are great, and it has the potential to give Rosie some real backstory too!

2: Salty: Salty also worked at Southampton when Rebecca would have been in service, his class having been introduced in 1962, giving up to five years’ worth of potential overlap. Though it’s less likely the pair would have crossed paths, Salty would still know a lot about the West Country Class. He could potentially even float the idea of her getting rebuilt like a number of her siblings, which would add some real-life facts to the series! It would also be interesting to see Rebecca avoid Salty because she doesn’t want to be exposed by him - remember, she was in service at the end of BR, and really wouldn’t trust diesels based on what they did.

3: Thomas: Thomas’ class also worked at Southampton when Rebecca would have been in service! However, Thomas would not have personally been at Southampton which means the connection is a little looser. Instead, he could have heard about them from a sibling, or maybe Stepney? Imagine Thomas being really excited to meet this new engine who he’s heard all these positive things about and then it’s this standoffish, grumpy engine who Gordon says is dangerous at speed. It would make for such an interesting dynamic and we could see the cheeky and blunt Thomas from the early series again!

4: Oliver: These two both made it through the darkest days of BR and survived, and both are also very proud of their achievements - these being Rebecca’s speed and Oliver’s bravery - which could make a scenario where the two hype each other up, much to their own detriment. It would also be interesting to see how Toad would fit into this, seeing as Rebecca is quite reckless and Toad would be opposed to such a thing - and could create a really interesting dynamic where Oliver is forced to pick which of the two he believes during an episode. I can see Oliver being someone Rebecca trusts due to their shared experiences, and it gives Oliver some spotlight.

5: Emily: Emily was what Rebecca is - an express engine with wheelslip issues who is considered to be one of the best engines of their time. Emily is also an engine who has some issues with CGI-era characterisation and could really do with being revitalised, so why not work with it? Emily tries to be nice and kind with Rebecca, only to keep hitting brick walls and reverting to her old, bossy ways to try and force the new engine to do what Emily wants - bonus points if this is held as being the right thing to do in that situation! It could also play into her getting her number, maybe by rescuing Rebecca from an accident she got into?

6: Sir Handel: Sir Handel is another engine who desperately needs their characterisation revitalised, and Rebecca is a great chance! Sir Handel considers himself an express engine, and meeting Rebecca puffs him up as she regales him with tales of her speed. This plays into Sir Handel’s cockiness and he gets himself into trouble - and then he decides to get payback in whatever way possible, and we see the reverse of the situation where Sir Handel’s stories get Rebecca all fired up and she gets her own comeuppance. This would not only reintroduce Sir Handel, but also could set the foundations for Duke to return, with references to the MSR.

7: RWS Flying Scotsman: I specify RWS Scott because I want the kinder, more humble version we got in the RWS to the version we got in the CGI era. Seriously - this engine has just been saved from scrap and given a second chance and his first action is to antagonise his only living sibling? I want him trying to be a voice of reason to Rebecca, seeing as he is uniquely placed to know the consequences of wheelslip - something he also has; as well as recklessness - Scott was the first to officially hit 100mph, so he knows a thing or two! Even more, Rebecca might look up to Scott, based on his fame, though his stories may lead to her being more reckless!

8: BoCo: Remember I mentioned that the West Country Class caught on fire? Imagine a story with that, with BoCo (a Class 28 infamous for catching fire) as Rebecca’s foil. It could begin with BoCo backfiring and Rebecca making fun of him for it due to her disdain for the diesels who replaced her class before she suffers a similar fate when her boiler lagging catches fire and it’s BoCo who has to help her get her train home. It would be a great way for Rebecca to learn that diesels aren’t all bad, as well as giving her someone new to be friends with - and it would reintroduce BoCo! This could also help draw Rebecca down the branch to meet Bill and Ben…

9: Molly: Overtly shy Molly and secretly shy Rebecca who covers her shyness up with aggression would make for such an interesting dynamic! I can imagine Molly gathering up all of her courage to speak to Rebecca only to be shot down (unintentionally) and then never want to talk to Rebecca again, and it’s only when Rebecca realises that the bigger engine tries to hunt Molly down - possibly with hilarious consequences. This idea would really work well if you popped in Mavis, who would want to help Molly and stand up to Rebecca. It would also be interesting to reintroduce Molly, especially with Mattel wanting more gender equality.

10: Mike: This would be a case of grumpy, standoffish Mike versus standoffish-to-hide-insecurities Rebecca! These two would be about as productive as a house on fire. Literally! These two would naturally bump heads in the worst way possible, and it would create incredible comedy and infinite story potential. This would be even better if you added some inferiority complex on Mike’s side, based on the fact he’s never seen an engine this big before - seeing as Rebecca is the only engine of this size able to visit Arlesburgh. They would rile each other right the way up the wall and it would probably never get any better.

To conclude, Rebecca had real potential as a character - she had an iconic basis, good timing for her introduction and the role she was aiming to fill in many ways needed to be filled; Henry’s character assassination had made him hard to watch for a long time, and moving him out of the spotlight to give writers some time to rehabilitate him was long overdue. It’s just a real massive shame that they managed to fail so badly. By failing to properly plan and develop Rebecca, Mattel created a background character that they tried to have fill a major role that she simply was not able to fill. There were many better choices in the show to take Rebecca’s role, not least of all Molly - a yellow tender engine who was shy and a bit clumsy. By neglecting to properly integrate Rebecca into the series and then giving the show writers very little personality to work with, Mattel ensured that Rebecca would be a BWBA-exclusive character, an engine who never managed to gain half of the popularity of other characters who had comparable runtimes. Engines like Murdoch, Molly and BoCo have far better legacies than Rebecca, and it comes down to how they were treated by the series. All three were introduced with something that made them unique, be it through their interactions with other characters or through their own unique characterisation. Rebecca is a grim reminder to people developing characters for stories - especially characters being added later in the series to a cast of strong, notable and even iconic characters - that these late introductions need a lot of effort and carefully designed arcs to make them viable and allow them to become embedded into the series alongside those they share the screen with.

Rebecca is one of those characters who is enough of a blank slate that it is easy for people to project onto her. In some cases, this is useful to a character’s legacy - Fergus, Molly, and even Smudger all have been remembered far more fondly by the fanbase than their limited appearances ought to warrant, however this is mostly because they were given a strong enough personality by the show that these projections had preexisting characterisations to connect to. Rebecca was given far too little, and in redesigning her character, I feel like I’ve gained a new understanding of just how far Mattel had pushed the show prior to its cancellation. By expanding the series to include new characters from around the world while also demanding episodes with new, untested characters back on Sodor, the writing team was rushed to complete episodes with a plethora of new faces that had no substance to back them up. There was no chance for these foreign engines to become anything meaningful while Mattel demanded enough new characters to fill an entirely different series, nor was there time for many of the characters back on Sodor to develop meaningfully while the writers scrambled to try and create far too many new characters from scratch.

And it was the characterisations that suffered for it.

Once again, this was not an attempt to convince people to like or dislike the version of Rebecca found in BWBA, but instead look into why Rebecca as a character failed to stand up against the other Steam Team members or even many of the more notable secondary faces found in the TVS at this point in the series. This can be boiled down to comparisons to her predecessor, a lack of effort from Mattel to give Rebecca a chance to develop and the decision to use cliched characteristics to create a version of Rebecca that never was going to capture many viewers’ imaginations. This was also an attempt to redevelop Rebecca into someone that can be used by the fandom to rehabilitate her image, or at the least to point out what went wrong and what could have been done to fix it. Maybe someday Rebecca will get the redevelopment she deserved, or perhaps she will be left to the annals of Thomas history, becoming just another footnote in the ever-expanding list of characters who couldn’t stand the test of time.

Thank you for reading.

#weirdowithaquill #thomas the tank engine #railways #ttte #ttte rebecca #very long post #very very long post #ttte analysis #we do not like bwba in this blog #ttte emily #ttte henry #ttte gordon #ttte james #fix-it for rebecca #7600 words later...

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panspy · 1 day

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im so normal about the ending of black sails and i have a conclusion i came to that i have to share. spoilers OBVIOUSLY for the finale. also this is just the tip of the iceberg of revelations my brother and i have been talking about these last couple days i am so normal and cool about it

I think Silver killed Flint. And in doing so he thinks he saved him and is able to cope with this death the same way he copes with everything- denial.

Something immediately nagged at me about the whole story of sending Flint to find Thomas in Savannah. It has the same energy of telling your child that "no your dog Spot didn't die, we sent him to live on a farm upstate." and is exactly the kind of fantastical story Silver would concoct to placate anyone who asked- whether or not it would work. Why would it matter? He could tell them anything.

When John recounts Flints journey to Savannah he talks about the aggression and denial and reluctance to accept that on the other side of the journey will be peace. Which brings me, once again, as many of you who experienced (not watched. experienced) the shows unbreakable connection to greek mythos... the journey Flint takes to Savannah across the ocean, is his voyage across the River Styx. The stages of anger, grief, and acceptance to come to terms with your death and what awaits you on the other side, which isn't the fiery hell he's been promised for his sins but rather a tranquility in the Elysian Fields- the Isle of the Blessed. Located in the Western Ocean at the Edge of the World. The actual fields Thomas is working in and worked so hard for, waits for him in eternal peace. The Elysian Fields are for heroes, for martyrs, for men of such standing that history will remember them until there is no one left to tell their stories. Stories that Silver makes effort to tell. As all journeys on Charons boat, a toll must be paid. The simple sack of coins given to the Groundskeeper as admittance to a simple paradise.

I think Silver believes he saved Flint from something he could not bear to see his friend experience, and the greatest gift he could give him was a death at his own hand. And in the conclusion of the act, separated himself from it altogether by entering his final metamorphosis into Long John Silver, the separate being from John Silver, partner of James Flint.

The thing about Silver I can't get out of my head is his inability to envision a future, any future, in which he doesn't sacrifice his whole being, the whole world, for the possibility of peace. And when you sacrifice the world for your own self preservation, you destroy the people you wanted to protect in the first place. Silver has no past to learn from, he only has the present. He can't envision a future because he can't see himself being perceived in the lives of others. He's not watching the past, the wrist, and he can't picture a future outside the present, the tip of the sword. He's too busy looking at the eyes.

#black sails #black sails analysis #john silver #long john silver #captain flint #james flint #black sails finale #john silver black sails #captain flint black sails #black sails spoilers

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tutyayilmazz · 1 year

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The sheer number of older and more experienced professionals involved in Måneskin introduces a tension between the rock conventions that characterize their songwriting and the fundamentally pop circumstances under which those songs are produced. They are four friends in a band, but that band is inside an enormous machine. From their perspective, though, the machine is good.

The American visitor to Rome arrives with certain preconceptions that feel like stereotypes but turn out to be basically accurate. There really are mopeds flying around everywhere, and traffic seems governed by the principle that anyone can be replaced. Breakfast is coffee and cigarettes. Despite these orthopedic and nutritional hazards, everyone is better looking — not literally everyone, of course, but statistically, as if whatever selective forces that emerge from urban density have had an extra hundred generations or so to work. And they really do talk like that, an emphatic mix of vowels, gestures and car horns known as “Italian.” To be scolded in this language by a driver who wants to park in the crosswalk is to realize that some popular ideas are actually true. Also, it is hot.

The triumphant return to Rome of Måneskin — arguably the only rock stars of their generation, and almost certainly the biggest Italian rock band of all time — coincided with a heat wave across Southern Europe. On that Tuesday in July the temperature hit 107 degrees. The Tiber looked thick, rippled in places and still in others, as if it were reducing. By Thursday morning the band’s vast management team was officially concerned that the night’s sold-out performance at the Stadio Olimpico would be delayed. When Måneskin finally took the stage around 9:30 p.m., it was still well into the 90s — which was too bad, because there would be pyro.

There was no opening act, possibly because no rock band operating at this level is within 10 years of Måneskin’s age. The guitarist Thomas Raggi played the riff to “Don’t Wanna Sleep,” the lights came up and 60,000 Italians screamed. Damiano David — the band’s singer and, at age 24, its oldest member — charged out in black flared trousers and a mesh top that bisected his torso diagonally, his heavy brow and hypersymmetrical features making him look like some futuristic nomad who hunted the fishnet mammoth. Victoria De Angelis, the bassist, wore a minidress made from strips of leather or possibly bungee cords. Raggi wore nonporous pants and a black button-down he quickly discarded, while Ethan Torchio drummed in a vest with no shirt underneath, his hair flying. For the next several minutes of alternately disciplined and frenzied noise, they sounded as if Motley Crüe had been cryogenically frozen, then revived in 2010 with Rob Thomas on vocals.

That hypothetical will appeal to some while repelling others, and which category you fall into is, with all due respect, not my business here. Rolling Stone, for its part, said that Måneskin “only manage to confirm how hard rock & roll has to work these days to be noticed,” and a viral Pitchfork review called their most recent album “absolutely terrible at every conceivable level.” But this kind of thumbs up/thumbs down criticism is pretty much vestigial now that music is free. If you want to know whether you like Måneskin — the name is Danish and pronounced MOAN-eh-skin — you can fire up the internet and add to the more than nine billion streams Sony Music claims the band has accumulated across Spotify, YouTube, et cetera. As for whether Måneskin is good, de gustibus non est disputandum, as previous Italians once said: In matters of taste, there can be no arguments.

You should know, though, that even though their music has been heard most often through phone and laptop speakers, Måneskin sounds better on a soccer field. That is what tens of thousands of fans came to the Stadio Olimpico on an eyelid-scorching Thursday to experience: the culturally-if-not-personally-familiar commodity of a stadium rock show, delivered by the unprecedented phenomenon of a stadium-level Italian rock band. The pyro — 20-foot jets of swivel-articulated flame that you could feel all the way up in the mezzanine — kicked in on “Gasoline,” a song Måneskin wrote to protest Vladimir Putin’s invasion of Ukraine. From a thrust platform in the center of the field, David poured his full emotive powers into the pre-chorus: “Standing alone on that hill/using your fuel to kill/we won’t take it standing still/watch us dance.”

The effect these words will have on President Putin is unknown. They capture something, though, about rock ’n’ roll, which has established certain conventions over the last seven decades. One of those conventions is an atmosphere of rebellion. It doesn’t have to be real — you probably don’t even want it to be — but neither can it seem too contrived, because the defining constraint of rock as a genre is that you have to feel it. The successful rock song creates in listeners the sensation of defying consensus, even if they are right in step with it.

The need to feel the rock may explain the documented problem of fans’ taste becoming frozen in whatever era was happening when they were between the ages of 15 and 25. Anyone who adolesced after Spotify, however, did not grow up with rock as an organically developing form and is likely to have experienced the whole catalog simultaneously, listening to Led Zeppelin at the same time they listened to Pixies and Franz Ferdinand — i.e. as a genre rather than as particular artists, the way my generation (I’m 46) experienced jazz. The members of Måneskin belong to this post-Spotify cohort. As the youngest and most prominent custodians of the rock tradition, their job is to sell new, guitar-driven songs of 100 to 150 beats per minute to a larger and larger audience, many of whom are young people who primarily think of such music as a historical artifact. Starting this month, Måneskin will take this business on a multivenue tour of the United States — a market where they are considerably less known — whose first stop is Madison Square Garden.

“I think the genre thing is like ... ” Torchio said to me backstage in Rome, making a gesture that conveyed translingual complexity. “We can do a metaphor: If you eat fish, meat and peanuts every day, like for years, and then you discover potatoes one day, you’ll be like: ‘Wow, potatoes! I like potatoes; potatoes are great.’ But potatoes have been there the whole time.” Rock was the potato in this metaphor, and he seemed to be saying that even though many people were just now discovering that they liked it, it had actually been around for a long time. It was a revealing analogy: The implication was that rock, like the potato, is here to stay; but what if rock is, like the potato in our age of abundance, comparatively bland and no longer anyone’s favorite?

Which rock song came first is a topic of disagreement, but one strong candidate is “Rocket 88,” recorded by Ike Turner and his Kings of Rhythym band in 1951. It’s about a car and, in its final verse, about drinking in the car. These themes capture the context in which rock ’n’ roll emerged: a period when household incomes, availability of consumer goods and the share of Americans experiencing adolescence all increased simultaneously.

Although and possibly because rock started as Black music, it found a gigantic audience of white teenagers during the so-called British Invasion of the mid-1960s (the Beatles, the Rolling Stones, the Who), which made it the dominant form of pop music for the next two decades. The stadium/progressive era (Journey, Fleetwood Mac, Foreigner) that now constitutes the bulk of classic-rock radio gave way, eventually, to punk (the Ramones, Patti Smith, Minor Threat) and then glam metal: Twisted Sister, Guns N’ Roses and various other hair-intensive bands that were obliterated by the success of Nirvana and Pearl Jam in 1991. This shift can be understood as the ultimate triumph of punk, both in its return to emotive content expressed through simpler arrangements and in its professed hostility toward the music industry itself. After 1991, suspicion of anything resembling pop became a mark of seriousness among both rock critics and fans.

It is probably not a coincidence that this period is also when rock’s cultural hegemony began to wane. As the ’90s progressed, larger and again whiter audiences embraced hip-hop, and the last song classified as “rock” to reach No. 1 on the Billboard Hot 100 was Nickelback’s “How You Remind Me” in 2001. The run of bands that became popular during the ’00s — the Strokes, the Killers, Kings of Leon — constituted rock’s last great commercial gasp, but none of their singles charted higher than No. 4. Let us say, then, that the era of rock as pop music lasted from 1951 to 2011. That’s a three-generation run, if you take seriously rock’s advice to get drunk and have sex in the car and therefore produce children at around age 20. Baby boomers were the generation that made rock a zillion-dollar industry; Gen X saved it from that industry with punk and indie, and millennials closed it all out playing Guitar Hero.

The members of Måneskin are between the ages of 22 and 24, situating them firmly within the cadre of people who understand rock in the past tense. De Angelis, the bassist, and Raggi, the guitarist, formed the band when they were both attending a music-oriented middle school; David was a friend of friends, while Torchio was the only person who responded to their Facebook ad seeking a drummer. There are few entry-level rock venues in Rome, so they started by busking on the streets. In 2017, they entered the cattle-call audition for the Italian version of “The X Factor.” They eventually finished as runners-up to the balladeer Lorenzo Licitra, and an EP of songs they performed on the show was released by Sony Music and went triple platinum.

In 2021, Måneskin won the Sanremo Music Festival, earning the right to represent Italy with their song “Zitti e Buoni” (whose title roughly translates to “shut up and behave”) in that year’s Eurovision Song Contest. This program is not widely viewed in the United States, but it is a gigantic deal in Europe, and Måneskin won. Not long after, they began to appear on international singles charts, and “I Wanna Be Your Slave” broke the British Top 10. A European tour followed, as well as U.S. appearances at festivals and historic venues.

This ascent to stardom was not unmarred by controversy. The Eurovison live broadcast caught David bending over a table offstage, and members of the media accused him of snorting cocaine. David insisted he was innocent and took a drug test, which he passed, but Måneskin and their management still seem indignant about the whole affair. It’s exactly this kind of incongruous detail — this damaging rumor that a rock star did cocaine — that highlights how the Italian music-consuming public differs from the American one. Many elements of Måneskin’s presentation, like the cross-dressing and the occasional male-on-male kiss, are genuinely upsetting to older Italians, even as they seem familiar or even hackneyed to audiences in the United States.

“They see a band of young, good-looking guys that are dressing up too much, and then it’s not pure rock ’n’ roll, because you’re not in a garage, looking ugly,” De Angelis says. “The more conservative side, they’re shocked because of how we dress or move onstage, or the boys wear makeup.”

She and her bandmates are caught between two demographics: the relatively conservative European audience that made them famous and the more tolerant if not downright desensitized American audience that they must impress to keep the ride moving. And they do have to keep it moving, because — like many rock stars before them — most of the band dropped out of high school to do this. At one point, Raggi told me that he had sat in on some classes at a university, “Just to try to understand, ‘What is that?’”

One question that emerged early in my discussions with Måneskin’s friendly and professional management team was whether I was going to say that their music was bad. This concern seemed related to the aforementioned viral Pitchfork review, in which the editor Jeremy Larson wrote that their new album, “RUSH!” sounds “like it’s made for introducing the all-new Ford F-150” and “seems to be optimized for getting busy in a Buffalo Wild Wings bathroom” en route to a score of 2.0 (out of 10). While the members of Måneskin seemed to take this review philosophically, their press liaisons were concerned that I was coming to Italy to have a similar type of fun.

Here I should disclose that Larson edited an essay I wrote for Pitchfork about the Talking Heads album “Remain in Light�� (score: 10.0) and that I think of myself as his friend. Possibly because of these biases, I read his review as reflecting his deeply held and, among rock fans, widely shared need to feel the music, something that the many pop/commercial elements of “RUSH!” (e.g. familiar song structures, lyrics that seem to have emerged from a collaboration between Google Translate and Nikki Sixx, compulsive use of multiband compression) left him unable to do.

This perspective reflects the post-’90s rock consensus (PNRC) that anything that sounds too much like a mass-market product is no good. The PNRC is premised on the idea that rock is not just a structure of song but also a structure of relationship between the band and society. From rock’s earliest days as Black music, the real or perceived opposition between rocker and society has been central to its appeal; this adversarial relationship animated the youth and counterculture eras of the ’60s and then, when the economic dominance of mass-market rock made it impossible to believe in, provoked the revitalizing backlash of punk. Even major labels felt obliged to play into this paradoxical worldview, e.g. that period after Nirvana when the most popular genre of music was called “alternative.” Måneskin, however, are defined by their isolation from the PNRC. They play rock music, but operate according to the logic of pop.

In Milan, where Måneskin would finish their Italian minitour, I had lunch with the band, as well as two of their managers, Marica Casalinuovo and Fabrizio Ferraguzzo. Casalinuovo had been an executive producer working on “The X Factor,” and Ferraguzzo was its musical director; around the time that Måneskin broke through, Casalinuovo and Ferraguzzo left the show and began working with the stars it had made. We were at the in-house restaurant of Moysa, the combination recording studio, soundstage, rehearsal space, offices, party venue and “creative playground” that Ferraguzzo opened two months earlier. After clarifying that he was in no way criticizing major record labels and the many vendors they engaged to record, promote and distribute albums, he laid out his vision for Moysa, a place where all those functions were performed by a single corporate entity — basically describing the concept of vertical integration.

Ferraguzzo oversaw the recording of “RUSH!” along with a group of producers that included Max Martin, the Swedish hitmaker best known for his work with Backstreet Boys and Britney Spears. At Moysa, Ferraguzzo played for me Måneskin’s then-unreleased new single, “Honey (Are U Coming?)” which features many of the band’s signature moves — guitar and bass playing the same melodic phrases at the same time, unswung boogie-type rhythm of the post-Strokes style — but also has David singing in a higher register than usual. I listened to it first on studio monitors and then through the speaker of Ferraguzzo’s phone, and it sounded clean and well produced both times, as if a team of industry veterans with unlimited access to espresso had come together to perfect it.

“There’s hundreds of people working and talking about you and giving opinions,” De Angelis said at lunch. “So if you start to get in this loop of wanting to know and control and being anxious about it, it really ruins everything.” Here lies the conflict between what the PNRC wants from a band — resistance to outside influences, contempt for commerce, authenticity as measured in doing everything themselves — and what any sane 23-year-old would want, which is to have someone with an M.B.A. make all the decisions so she can concentrate on playing bass.

The other way Måneskin is isolated from the PNRC is geographic. Over the course of lunch, it became clear that they had encyclopedic knowledge of certain eras in American rock history but were only dimly aware of others. Raggi, for instance, loves Motley Crüe and has an album-by-album command of the Los Angeles hair-metal band Skid Row, which he and his bandmates seemed to understand were supposed to be guilty pleasures. But none of them had ever heard of Fugazi, the post-hardcore band whose hatred of major labels, refusal to sell merchandise and commitment to keeping ticket prices as low as possible set the standard for a generation of American rock snobs. In general, Måneskin’s timeline of influences seems to break off around 1990, when the rock most respected by Anglophone critics was produced by independent labels that did not have strong overseas distribution. It picks up again with Franz Ferdinand and the “emo” era of mainstream pop rock. This retrospect leaves them unaware of the indie/punk/D.I.Y. period that was probably most important in forming the PNRC.

The question is whether that consensus still matters. While snobs like Larson and me are overrepresented in journalism, we never constituted a majority of rock fans. That’s the whole point of being a snob. And snobbery is obsolete anyway; digital distribution ended the correlation between how obscure your favorite band was and how much effort you put into listening to them. The longevity of rock ’n’ roll as a genre, meanwhile, has solidified a core audience that is now between the ages of 40 and 80, rendering the fan-versus-society dimension of the PNRC impossible to believe. And the economics of the industry — in which streaming has reduced the profit margin on recorded music, and the closure of small venues has made stadiums and big auditoriums the only reliable way to make money on tour — have decimated the indie model. All these forces have converged to make rock, for the first time in its history, merely a way of writing songs instead of a way of life.

Yet rock as a cluster of signifiers retains its power around the world. In the same way everyone knows what a castle is and what it signifies, even though actual castles are no longer a meaningful force in our lives, rock remains a shared language of cultural expression even though it is no longer determining our friendships, turning children against their parents, yelling truth at power, et cetera. Also like a castle, a lot of people will pay good money to see a preserved historical example of rock or even a convincing replica of it, especially in Europe.

In Milan, the temperature had dropped 20 degrees, and Måneskin’s show at Stadio Giuseppe Meazza — commonly known as San Siro, the largest stadium in Italy, sold out that night at 60,000 — was threatened by thunderstorms instead of record-breaking heat. Fans remained undaunted: Many camped in the parking lot the night before in order to be among the first to enter the stadium. One of them was Tamara, an American who reported her age as 60½ and said she had skipped a reservation to see da Vinci’s “Last Supper” in order to stay in line. “When you get to knocking on the door, you kind of want to do what you want,” she said.

The threat of rain was made good at pretty much the exact moment the show began. The sea of black T-shirts on the pitch became a field of multicolored ponchos, and raindrops were bouncing visibly off the surface of the stage. David lost his footing near the end of “I Wanna Be Your Slave,” briefly rolling to his back, while De Angelis — who is very good at making lips-parted-in-ecstasy-type rock faces — played with her eyes turned upward to the flashing sky, like a martyr.

The rain stopped in time for “Kool Kids,” a punk-inspired song in which David affects a Cockney accent to sing about the vexed cultural position of rock ’n’ roll: “Cool kids, they do not like rock/they only listen to trap and pop.” These are probably the Måneskin lyrics most quoted by music journalists, although they should probably be taken with a grain of salt, considering that the song also contains lyrics like “I like doin’ things I love, yeah” and “Cool kids, they do not vomit.”

“Kool Kids” was the last song before the encore, and each night a few dozen good-looking 20-somethings were released onto the stage to dance and then, as the band walked off, to make we’re-not-worthy bows around Raggi’s abandoned guitar. The whole thing looked at least semichoreographed, but management assured me that the Kool Kids were not professional dancers — just enthusiastic fans who had been asked if they wanted to be part of the show. I kept trying to meet the person in charge of wrangling these Kool Kids, and there kept being new reasons that was not possible.

The regular kids, on the other hand, were available and friendly throughout. In Rome, Dorca and Sara, two young members of a Måneskin fan club, saw my notebook and shot right over to tell me they loved the band because, as Sara put it, “they allow you to be yourself.” When asked whether they felt their culture was conservative in ways that prevented them from being themselves, Dorca — who was 21 and wearing eyeglasses that looked like part of her daily wardrobe and a mesh top that didn’t — said: “Maybe it turns out that you can be yourself. But you don’t know that at first. You feel like you can’t.”

Here lies the element of rock that functions independently from the economics of the industry or the shifting preferences of critics, the part that is maybe independent from time itself: the continually renewed experience of adolescence, of hearing and therefore feeling it all for the first time. But how disorienting must those feelings be when they have been fully monetized, fully sanctioned — when the response to your demand to rock ’n’ roll all night and party every day is, “Great, exactly, thank you.” In a culture where defying consensus is the dominant value, anything is possible except rebellion. It must be strange, in this post-everything century, to finally become yourself and discover that no one has any problem with that.

#måneskin #maneskin #i had a free nyt article so here you go #the article is so painfully a middle aged american perspective #which the author admits #and like thinking the fans on stage is staged?!??#or like how there can be no more authentic rebellion - maybe that's what it's like from your cushy position #but doesn't go into tdi at all #the stuff about the industry surrounding them i agree and its worth the read though

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rmstitanics · 5 months

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List 5 topics you could talk about for an hour without preparing any material.

With Malice Toward None: a Musical of Abraham Lincoln and the Civil War. I’ve been developing this musical since summer 2020. With Malice Toward None focuses on exploring the mental health struggles that Lincoln experienced during his presidency. The musical is narrated by Robert Todd Lincoln, who recalls the storyline’s events with complete omniscience while at the 1922 Lincoln Memorial dedication. Relevant themes for the show include mental health, public history, teams that become brotherhoods, compassion, the stages of grief, leadership, and a bunch of other concepts that I’ll probably end up yapping about on here at some point. Orchestrally, the show can be described as “if Les Misérables, Hello Dolly, and Evita decided to have a threesome in my brain”.

all of my original characters. seriously. I have SO MANY OF THEM that I’ve developed over the years, mostly for historical fiction. 😭 the ones that are living rent free in my head the most right now are Anastasia Andrews-Ismay (the human personification of the Titanic), Lieutenant General Ethan Clay, and Dr. Constance Pierpont Morgan. Honorable mention goes to my Star Wars OC Shi’al Valorum 💅 if any of these muses seem familiar to you then we’ve probably either been in a discord server together or you’ve somehow stumbled across one of my roleplay blogs.

the rms titanic. literally EVERYTHING about this ship and her sinking is my Roman Empire. I’m particularly fond of yapping about Captain Smith, Thomas Andrews, Wallace Hartley, William Pirrie, J.P. Morgan, or any of the officers — but if you get me talking about the vilification of Bruce Ismay by the sensationalist yellow press in the aftermath of the sinking, then I WILL NEVER SHUT UP.

star wars. my first exposure to the Star Wars franchise was when I was a sophomore in high school and I got to see a screening of A New Hope where the soundtrack was played by a live orchestra. suffice to say, this altered my brain chemistry and I’ve never been the same since. I’m a Prequels girlie and Jedi apologist to my CORE; my favorite characters are probably Yoda, Dooku, Mace Windu, and Bail Organa.

film and tv soundtracks. …the fact that I once did a TWENTY FIVE MINUTE LONG presentation on the film score for Titanic (1997) should tell you everything that you need to know about this silly fixation of mine.

HONORABLE MENTIONS: ghost hunting, tarot cards, classical music, Taylor Swift, creative liberties taken by Lin Manuel Miranda for Hamilton, historical fiction as a genre in an era where media literacy is on the decline, Antebellum America, the Great Triumvirate (Henry Clay, John Calhoun, Daniel Webster), the Lost Cause of the Confederacy, and public history.

TAGGED BY no one. I stole it from the for you tab LOL

TAGGING: @viellohi, @the-rmstitanic, @man-i-dunno, @allysah, @charmwasjess, @quicksiluers, @aceofthyme, @tipsywench, @macaron-n-cheese, @meerawrites, @elisabeth515, @its-rmstitanic, @mattaytchtaylor, @tommy-288, @chamberlainswifey, AND YOU.

* make a separate post. do not reblog.

#I’m going to start doing dash games on here and I figured this would be a perfect one to get us started 💅#dash games

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thepastisalreadywritten · 8 months

Text

By Dina Fine Maron

January 24, 2024

Scientists have cleared a significant hurdle in the years-long effort to save Africa’s northern white rhinoceros from extinction with the first-ever rhino pregnancy using in vitro fertilization.

The lab-assisted pregnancy, which researchers will announce today, involved implanting a southern white rhino embryo in a surrogate mother named Curra.

The advance provides the essential “proof of concept” that this strategy could help other rhinos, says Jan Stejskal of the BioRescue project, the international group of scientists leading this research.

Curra died just a couple months into her 16-month pregnancy from an unrelated bacterial infection, Stejskal says.

However, the successful embryo transfer and early stages of pregnancy pave the way for next applying the technique to the critically endangered northern white rhino.

The process was documented exclusively by National Geographic for an upcoming Explorer special currently slated to air in 2025 on Nat Geo and Disney+.

BioRescue expects to soon implant a northern white rhino embryo into a southern white rhino surrogate mother.

The two subspecies are similar enough, according to the researchers, that the embryo will be likely to develop.

Eventually, this approach may also help other critically endangered rhinos, including the Asian Javan rhinoceros and the Sumatran rhinoceros, which each now number under 100 individuals, Stejskal says.

But the northern white rhino’s current situation is the most pressing by far.

There are no males left, and the only two remaining animals are both elderly females that live under armed guard on a reserve in a 700-acre enclosure in Kenya called Ol Pejeta Conservancy.

The boxy-jawed animals once roamed across central Africa, but in recent decades, their numbers have plummeted due to the overwhelming international demand for their horn, a substance used for unproved medicinal applications and carvings.

Made from the same substance as fingernails, rhino horn is in demand from all species, yet the northern white rhino has been particularly hard-hit.

"These rhinos look prehistoric, and they had survived for millions of years, but they couldn’t survive us,” says Ami Vitale, a National Geographic Explorer and photographer who has been documenting scientists’ efforts to help the animals since 2009.

“If there is some hope of recovery within the northern white rhino gene pool — even though it’s a substantially smaller sample of what there was — we haven’t lost them,” says conservation ecologist David Balfour, who chairs the International Union for the Conservation of Nature’s African rhino specialist group.

Blueprints for rhino babies

To stave off the animal’s disappearance, BioRescue has used preserved sperm from northern white rhinos and eggs removed from the younger of the two remaining females.

So far, they’ve created about 30 preserved embryos, says Thomas Hildebrandt, the head scientist of BioRescue and an expert in wildlife reproduction based at the Leibniz-Institute of Zoo and Wildlife Research in Berlin.

Eventually, the team plans to reintroduce northern white rhinos into the wild within their range countries.

“That’d be fantastic, but really, really far from now—decades from now,” says Stejskal.

Worldwide, there are five species of rhinoceros, and many are in trouble.

Across all of Africa, there are now only about 23,000 of the animals, and almost 17,000 of them are southern whites.

Then there are more than 6,000 black rhinos, which are slightly smaller animals whose three subspecies are critically endangered.

In Asia, beyond the critically endangered Javan and Sumatran rhinos, there’s also the greater one-horned rhino, whose numbers are increasing and currently are estimated to be around 2,000.

The BioRescue effort has experienced many setbacks, and even though the team now has frozen embryos, the clock is ticking.

The researchers intend to use southern white rhinos as surrogate moms for the northern white rhino embryos.

However, scientists want any northern white rhino calves to meet and learn from others of their kind, which means they need to be born before the two remaining females die.

“These animals learn behaviors — they don’t have them genetically hard-wired,” says Balfour, who’s not involved with the BioRescue work.

But birthing new animals in time will be a challenge.

“We’re really skating on the edge of what’s possible,” he says, “but it’s worth trying.”

Najin, the older female, will be 35 this year, and Fatu will be 24.

The animals, which were born in a zoo in the Czech Republic, are expected to live to about 40, says Stejskal, who also serves as director of international projects at the Safari Park Dvůr Králové, the zoo where the animals lived until they were brought to Kenya in 2009.

Impregnating a rhino

The next phase of BioRescue’s plan involves implanting one of their limited number of northern white rhino embryos into a southern white rhino surrogate mother — which the group plans to do within the next six months, Stejskal says.

They’ve identified the next surrogate mother and set up precautions to protect her from bacterial infections, including a new enclosure and protocols about disinfecting workers’ boots.

But now, they must wait until the female rhino is in estrus — the period when the animal is ready to mate — to implant the egg.

To identify that prime fertile time, they can’t readily perform regular ultrasounds at the conservancy as they might do in a zoo.

Instead, they have enlisted a rhino bull that has been sterilized to act as a “teaser” for the female, Hildebrandt says, adding that they must wait a few months to make sure that their recently sterilized male is truly free of residual sperm.

Once the animals are brought together, their couplings will alert conservancy staff that the timing is right for reproductive success.

The sex act is also important because it sets off an essential chain of events in the female’s body that boosts the chances of success when they surgically implant the embryo about a week later.

"There’s little chance the conservancy staff will miss the act. White rhinos typically mate for 90 minutes," Hildebrandt says.

What’s more, while mounted on the females, the males often use their temporary height to reach tasty plant snacks that are generally out of reach.

Boosting genetic diversity

With so few northern white rhinos left, their genetic viability may seem uncertain.

But the BioRescue team points to southern white rhinos, whose numbers likely dropped to less than 100, and perhaps even as few as 20, due to hunting in the late 1800s.

Government protections and intense conservation strategies allowed them to bounce back, and now there are almost 17,000.

“They have sufficient diversity to cope with a wide range of conditions,” says Balfour.

Researchers don’t know exactly how many southern white rhinos existed a century ago, he says, but it’s clear that the animals came back from an incredibly low population count and that they now appear healthy.

Beyond their small collection of embryos, the BioRescue team hopes to expand the northern white rhino’s gene pool by drawing from an unconventional source — skin cells extracted from preserved tissue samples that are currently stored at zoos.

They aim to use stem cell techniques to reengineer those cells and develop them into sex cells, building off similar work in lab mice.

According to their plan, those lab-engineered sex cells would then be combined with natural sperm and eggs to make embryos, and from there, the embryos would be implanted into southern white rhino surrogate mothers.

Such stem cell reprogramming work has previously led to healthy offspring in lab mice, Hildebrandt says, but rhinos aren’t as well-studied and understood as mice, making this work significantly challenging.

A global effort

The northern white rhino revitalization venture has cost millions of dollars, supported by a range of public and private donors, including the German Federal Ministry of Education and Research.

Other partners on the effort include the Leibniz Institute for Zoo and Wildlife Research, the Czech Republic’s Safari Park, Kenya Wildlife Service, Ol Pejeta Conservancy, and also Katsuhiko Hayashi, a professor of genome biology at Osaka University in Japan who conducted the mouse stem cell research.

Building upon Hayashi’s stem cell techniques could ultimately bring the northern white rhino gene pool up to 12 animals — including eggs from eight females and the semen of four bulls, according to Stejskal.

An alternative approach to making more babies, like crossbreeding northern and southern white rhinos, would mean the resulting calves wouldn’t be genetically pure northern white rhinos, Hildebrandt notes.

The two subspecies look quite similar, but the northern version has subtle physical differences, including hairier ears and feet that are better suited to its swampy habitat.

The two animals also have different genes that may provide disease resiliency or other benefits, Hildebrandt says.

There are unknown potential differences in behavior and ecological impact when populating the area with southern white rhinos or cross-bred animals.

"The northern white rhino is on the brink of extinction really only due to human greed,” Stejskal says.

“We are in a situation where saving them is at our fingertips, so I think we have a responsibility to try.”

🩶🦏🩶

#northern white rhinoceros #rhino embryo transfer #in vitro fertilization #IVF #southern white rhinoceros #critically endangered animals #National Geographic #BioRescue #rhino horn #International Union for the Conservation of Nature #African rhino specialist group #Thomas Hildebrandt #German Federal Ministry of Education and Research #Leibniz Institute for Zoo and Wildlife Research #Kenya Wildlife Service #Ol Pejeta Conservancy #Katsuhiko Hayashi #genome biology #IVF rhino pregnancy

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literatehiss · 5 months

Text

Split Stage

The musings of one Thomas Zane on those that keep him company, their differences and what unites them, in the endless night of the Dark Place. Mature. Blood & Violence Read on AO3 here

A swirl of the glass, the muffled clink of an ice cube, the refreshing smell of oranges.

Zane took a sip, watching the lights in his room reflect off the crimson drink. It had been a while since his usual visitors had stopped by and if it wasn't for how recent getting any visitors was, he would likely be getting pretty lonely by now. After so many years however, with only himself and the creature pretending to be his beloved, loneliness was an old, familiar friend. It wouldn’t be long, he supposed, between his writer and his scientist, he was sure his room wouldn’t be empty for much longer.

--------------------

Alan was the more frequent of the two, more able to actually control when he showed up. Up to a point of course, Zane shuddered to think what Wake would be capable of if he actually fully mastered his abilities.

Generally, Alan entered the apartment with little warning, a few knocks if he was feeling generous, but mostly the writer just swung the door open as soon as he arrived. Alan rarely entered room 665 in the same mood as the time before, whatever horrors he had experienced on the way affecting his mood wildly.

Mostly, he seemed confused, lacking memories of previous encounters or concussed from wounds he had sustained on the journey. Easily overwhelmed, that was how Zane would describe Alan, whether he was already soft and confused, angry or sad, violent or searching, it was never too hard for Tom to wind his words and power around the other man and get him how he wanted him.

Tom definitely preferred the writer pliable, often inebriated. Like everything with the stubborn man, getting Alan to let loose, have a few drinks and indulge in all the other things Alan pretended he didn't want, was an endless, thankless task. The handsome bastard was lucky Zane had gained inhuman patience in his time in the Dark Place. He certainly needed it.

--------------------

Casper, on the other hand, always waited at the door, waited for Zane to let him in. Always ever so excited to see him again, never sure where he would end up next and glad to find a safe haven. Tom loved to compare him to a puppy, affectionate, excitable, deceptively destructive and dangerous.

Like Alan he was often confused, but that beautiful scientific mind of his buoyed Darling from the darkness around him. His curiosity and wonder at the incomprehensible world around him was gorgeous to behold, after so long down here any curiosity Zane had once had in this world was long dead.

Zane didn’t need any pretty words to get Darling to relax in his presence, and honestly rarely used his powers on the other man. Well… at least not without Casper’s enthusiastic approval. Dangerous in its own way, Tom had planned many an enjoyable evening only for it to get sidetracked because Darling wanted to experiment with his abilities.

Not that the experiments couldnt be enjoyable in their own way.

Zane always offered the other a drink, but unlike the writer, his scientist was much more fun when he was still mostly sensible. Their post-sex talks, sipping on whatever cocktail Tom was making that week, were the highlight of his day as he learnt so much about the world in the decades he had been trapped down here. Zane hid his affectionate grin behind his glass as the other man giggled over his own dumb jokes.

--------------------

With a flicker of film Zane was looking out of one of the tall windows that took up the back wall of his apartment. Curtain fluttering slightly in the breeze of the open window. It was dark out. It was always dark out.

An unending expanse of writhing shadow, the only light coming from the few streetlights in the immediate vicinity of the Oceanview Hotel. Sometimes, if he was lucky, he would see a tiny form jog across the pavement below.

Most of the time it was Alan, sometimes he wasn’t even coming to see him, just passing by, but every so often someone else had reason to visit the hotel. He could count the number of people who had come to his room on one hand and despite his craving for company, he just would not risk leaving the relative safety of his room, his domain.

--------------------

Alan, given enough time and effort, was more of a sweetheart than most who knew him would expect.

Zane loved to push him to the floor, to the couch, to the bed and occasionally to the cold glass of one of the windows. Anywhere that would let Zane look at all of Alan, those nervous blue eyes and trembling legs, so similar to his own. Once the writer had been calmed down, tamed and compliant, he was lovely in Zane's opinion. Wake was all grasping hands and stuttered moans, not passive exactly, but glad enough to lie back and let Tom have his fun.

Art and Artist combined in Zane’s bed, booze-soaked and pleasure-drunk, Wake bucking under kiss and bite in equal measure.

And how beautifully Alan showed the marks Zane gave him. The director, the poet, loved to make the other man into yet another work of art, little bites and bruises turning Alan into an ever-shifting, writhing canvas.

--------------------

Darling gave as good as he got.

Just as likely to shove Zane down to the bed as he was to let the artist press him down to those same sheets. Wrapping his arms around Zane’s waist, reeling him in. Casper was always enthusiastic, always as keen to get his hands on Tom as he was to be held in turn. Firm and solid against Tom, the scientist was often a whirlwind of manic energy that was hard to handle, even for Zane

Sometimes Tom found it difficult to reign the other man in, struggled to pull him down to earth, down into his own orbit and make him stay put. Whims of curiosity only sated for a moment before Darling was up and away yet again, crying out his latest theory in the same voice he cried out in Zane's bed. Reams of incomprehensible babble, understandable to Casper and Casper alone.

Zane loved him all the more for it.

Casper made him feel like a god, like a monster, like an experiment.

Powerful.

Dangerous.

Fascinating.

--------------------

Gazing around his room, the ‘House of Zane' as he liked to call it - mostly to annoy both his visitors, he recognized the mess that had been left after his last bender.

He really should tidy up.

Zane managed to gather a couple of empty bottles and place them to the side before boredom overtook him and he fling himself into his bed with an over dramatic sigh. The lights dimmed with his wish for sleep, but he knew it was as futile for him as it was for Wake. Casper managed it on occasion, but only after he had been thoroughly exhausted, the lucky bastard.

Pressing a hand to his side, he groaned as his fingers sunk into half-healed bruises. His memories as they were and time in the Dark Place as it was, he couldn't quite remember who or what had given them to him.

Film glitched and spluttered and Zane found himself holding another glass of liquor.

A sip.

A sigh.

It wouldn’t be long now.

--------------------

Sometimes the Alan that appears at his door, is not the writer he knows. Hair styled differently, clothes switched out and an unfamiliar grin, a confidence that suits the other but does not belong upon his face.

This Alan does not spiral in despondent misery as he fails to write, simply types and types and Scratches out what doesn’t fit, what doesn’t work, what doesn’t set them free.

This Not-Alan, this devil hiding in his writer's skin, this Mr Scratch that growls and bites and spits it's hate. Venomous in it's possession over their shared author.

Scratch pulls and snarls and fucks with no regard to the poet's pain or pleasure. Blood staining the scattered bedsheets, dripped from stinging cuts and a broken nose. Gushing from an open wound, the knife still standing proud from his twitching thigh. Crimson pooling between his lips and running like a trickling stream that threatened with each gasping breath to turn into a raging torrent down his heaving throat.

Face pressed to overfilled pillows, muffling Zane’s unwanted voice, not the voice the monster craves. Hands worn by violence oh so similar to those same hands stained by ink and rough from the press of typewriter keys.

And still Zane let him in.

--------------------

Sometimes after a night together, or when they are still tumbling in the sheets, Zane watches as his Darling drifts away, his touches meant for another.

Casper never talks about before he entered this looping hell. Brief mentions sure, he worked for the FBC, he was a scientist. But that was it.

Zane, given half a chance, would tell Darling his whole life story, his homeland - before he moved to America, his Barbara, the films he had made and the things he had seen.

But given silence in return.

Zane could feel the shadow of another, never made present but their absence obvious in what the other did not say and did not do. A name half-cried before silence once again reigned. A name that was not Zane's. A widening of his eyes, a stuttered breath when the poet lit a cigarette. He’d asked once, Zane sure he would receive no answer, not sure if he was scared of truth or of another secret kept.

A man. Casper's boss, his friend once, his lover once, lost to paranatural paranoia. Missed but gone from Darling’s life long before he’d shot himself.

No closure.

Zane could understand that.

--------------------

Flicking through piles of paper, theories and manuscripts left abandoned on the carpet floor, stained with spilled drinks. Tom amused himself with reading both side by side and wondering if he could build a film through the lens of these opposing scripts.

They were so different, his beloved visitors, both so focused and confused they barely paid attention to his manipulations of their worlds and of their memories. A scientist and an artist both so handsome in their different forms. Tom thought that he must be so lucky despite his horrific circumstance to share his time with two such bright stars in this endless night.

But they were not so different once he pressed them into his sheets. They moaned the same, begged the same, chanted his name like a god the same.

Looked at him like he had answers, the same.

He never did. Not that it mattered after all…

They always ate up his lies, the same.

Muffled sounds from beyond his door, footsteps approaching.

A knock.

Was it hesitant or impatient? Hard to tell.

A flicker of burning film and he stood before the door in all his glory. An unnecessary brush off of dust on the leather of his trousers, swiping away unnoticeable creases from his jacket. The door swung slowly open, moving on his command. A grin upon his face masking all other thoughts. Once more he was nothing but a part to play upon a darkened stage.

One day Tom Zane would leave this place, with the help of these two men he hoped, and in his place Thomas Seine would step out into the world once more, no more characters.

Just him.

#tom zane #alan wake #dr casper darling

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dustedmagazine · 2 years

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Learning to go out again: Jennifer Kelly’s 2022 in review

Meg Baird plays Chicago

Meg Baird calls it “people practice,” the ordinary skills that we require to interact successfully with other human beings. Small talk, the appropriate amount of eye contact, a certain minimal degree of comfort in crowds: these are all things that eroded in the pandemic. And going even further, I’d add we ran short of “leaving your living room practice,” the difficult process of readjusting to unpredictable environments again. I got really bad at that in 2020 and 2021.

So, while 2022 was, in many ways, a joyous return to the norm, it was also deeply uncomfortable. Again and again, I’d show up far too early to shows and avoid talking to strangers. I’d mistake soundchecks for music. I’d get bands mixed up and think the opener was the headliner or at least the second band. It was like I’d never been to a show in my life. But gradually, over a year that was really genuinely rich in opportunities to see live music, I started to remember why I loved it — and how to be marginally less annoying to everyone around me. And I got to see some wonderful performances.

There was James Xerxes Fussell’s intricately re-arranged Americana on the eve of a blizzard in January and Jaimie Branch’s mesmerizing Anteloper just a month or so before she died. Our local festival, Thing in the Spring, once again delivered incredible abundance with Lee Ranaldo, Myriam Gendron, Jeff Parker, Tashji Dorji and others all taking turns on the stage. I experienced the twilight magic of Bill MacKay and Nathan Bowles on a back porch in Northampton as the bats darted overhead, as well as the viscera-stirring low tones of Sarah Davachi at a three-story-tall pipe organ at Epsilon Spires in Brattleboro. I got to see one of my very favorite bands, Oneida, at a club in Greenfield, MA, late in the year. I saw my friend Eric Gagne’s band Footings expand Bonny Prince Billy’s songs into epic, twanging bravado. Yo La Tengo came to my tiny little town and tore the place down. In Chicago for my birthday weekend, I got a chance to hear Meg Baird and Chris Forsyth at a whiskey distillery on the Chicago River. It was a great year. I’m so glad I was there for it.

It was also an exceptional year for recorded music as, honestly, it always is. Here are the records I enjoyed the most in 2022, but don’t pay too much attention to the numbers. The order could change tomorrow, and I may very well discover more favorites in other people’s lists. (We’ll have a Slept On feature at some point early in 2023.) I’ve written a little bit about the top ten, but you can find longer reviews of most of them in the Dusted archives. I’ve linked these where available.

1. Winged Wheel—No Island (12XU): An underground-all-star remote collaboration melds the hard punk jangle of Rider/Horse’s Cory Plump, the unyielding percussion of Fred Thomas, the radiant guitar textures of Matthew J. Rolin and the ethereal vocal atmospheres of Matchess’ Whitney Johnson in a driving, enveloping otherworld. Just gorgeous.

2. Oneida—Success (Joyful Noise): The best band of the aughts has dabbled in all manner of droning, experimental forms in recent years, but with Success, they return to basics. “Beat Me to the Punch” and “I Wanna Hold Your Electric Hand” are gleeful bangers. “Paralyzed” is a keyboard pulsing, beat-rattling psychedelic dreamworld. Success is Oneida’s best album since Secret Wars and maybe ever. (I wrote the one-sheet for Success, but I would feel this way regardless.)

3. Cate Le Bon—Pompeii (Drag City): Eerie, madcap Pompeii refracts pandemic alienation through the lens of ancient disaster, floating narcotic imagery atop herky-jerk rhythms. Abstract and experimental, but also sublimely pop, Pompeii haunts and charms in equal measure.

4. Destroyer—Labyrinthitis (Merge): Dan Bejar is always interesting, but the COVID lockdown seems to have shaken him loose a bit. Labyrinthitis is typically arch, elliptical and elegant, but also a bit unhinged. Hear it in the extended rap that closes “June” or in the manic disco beat of “Suffer” or oblique but perfect wordplay in “Tinoretto, It’s for You.”

5. Horsegirl—Versions of Modern Performance (Matador): Horsegirl elicits a lysergic roar that’s loud but somehow serene, urgent but chilled. The trio out of Chicago were everywhere suddenly and all at once, as sometimes happens to bands, but on the strength of “World of Pots and Pans” and “Billy” I suspect they’ll stick around.

6. Jake Xerxes Fussell—Good and Green Again (Paradise of Bachelors): An early favorite that refused to fade, Good and Green Again considers old-time music from a variety of angles, often incorporating more than one version of a traditional tune in a seamless way. The music is lovely, made more exquisite still by James Elkington’s arrangements, which are subtle, right and unexpected.

7. Lambchop—The Bible (Merge): Stark and lavish at the same time, The Bible catches Kurt Wagner at his morose and mesmerizing best. Surreal sonic textures—including orchestral flourishes and autotuned funk beats—wreathe his weathered baritone, as he traipses through ordinary landscapes turned strange and warped.

8. The Weather Station—How Is It That I Should Look at the Stars (Fat Possum): Tamara Lindeman drew on Toronto’s vibrant jazz community to form her band for this sixth album as the Weather Station. The band improvised alongside here as it learned the songs. As a result, these songs have the usual pristine folk purity, but also a haze of late night sophistication in elegant runs of piano and pensive plucks of bass.

9. The Reds, Pinks and Purples—Summer at Land’s End (Slumberland): Glenn Donaldson is pretty much the best at bittersweet jangle pop right now, and this wistful, graceful collection of songs about life’s dissatisfactions is every bit as good as last year’s Uncommon Weather. Plus it’s got a seven-plus minute improvised guitar piece right in the middle, what’s not to love?

10. Tha Retail Simps—Reverberant Scratch (Total Punk): Montreal’s Retail Simps make ferocious garage rock with a bit of soul in its tail feathers. “Hit and Run” sounds like a lost Sam and the Shams b-side and “End of Times – Hip Shaker” with having doing exactly that. If they ever remake Animal House, here’s the band.

25 more albums I loved:

Non Plus Temps—Desire Choir (Post-Present Medium)

Joan Shelley—The Spur (Important)

Mountain Goats—Bleed Out (Merge)

The Sadies—Colder Streams (Yep Roc)

Spiritualized—Everything Was Beautiful (Fat Possum)

Superchunk—Wild Loneliness (Merge)

Hammered Hulls—Careening (Dischord)

Kilynn Lunsford—Custodians of Human Succession (Ever/Never)

Oren Ambarchi/Johan Berthling/Andreas Werliin—Ghosted (Drag City)

Green/Blue—Paper Thin (Feel It)

E—Any Information (Silver Rocket)

Sick Thoughts—Heaven Is No Fun (Total Punk)

Pedro the Lion—Havasu (Polyvinyl)

Pan*American—The Patience Fader (Kranky)

Weak Signal—War & War (Colonel)

Frog Eyes—The Bees (Paper Bag)

Pinch Points—Process (Exploding in Sound)

LIFE—True North (The Liquid Label)

Mary Lattimore & Paul Sukeena—West Kensington (Three Lobed)

Wau Wau Collectif—Mariage (Sahel Sounds)

Vintage Crop—Kibitzer (Upset the Rhythm)

Anna Tivel—Outsiders (Mama Bird)

Chronophage—S-T (Post-Present Medium/Bruit Direct Disques)

Sélébéyone— Xaybu: The Unseen (Pi)

Zachary Cale—Skywriting (Org Music)

Jennifer Kelly

#dusted magazine #yearend 2022 #jennifer kelly #winged wheel #oneida #cate le bon #destroyer #horsegirl #jake xerxes fussell #lambchop #the weather station #the reds pinks and purples #tha retail simpls

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weather-usa · 2 months

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‘Astonishing’ Antarctica Heat Wave Brings Temperatures 50 Degrees Above Normal

A record-breaking heat wave is unfolding in Antarctica, typically the coldest place on Earth, raising concerns among scientists about its implications for the continent’s future and the potential global consequences.

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Since mid-July, temperatures in parts of Antarctica have soared up to 50 degrees Fahrenheit above normal, with unseasonable warmth expected to persist through the first half of August.

Recent data reveals that temperatures in East Antarctica, where the most extreme conditions are occurring, have risen from the usual range of minus 58 to minus 76 degrees Fahrenheit to a much milder minus 13 to minus 22 degrees Fahrenheit.

While these temperatures are still cold, they are comparable to winter temperatures experienced in Bismarck, North Dakota, which has reached minus 20 degrees at least once a year since 1875. Antarctica’s usual winter cold is far more extreme than what most people in the U.S. are accustomed to.

The presence of summerlike heat in the middle of winter—despite much of the continent remaining below freezing—is alarming. This development is particularly concerning for a region capable of significantly contributing to sea level rise as global temperatures continue to increase due to fossil fuel pollution.

Most of the planet’s ice is stored in Antarctica, and if it all were to melt, it could raise global sea levels by more than 150 feet. Even smaller ice formations, such as the Doomsday Glacier, could contribute an additional 10 feet to sea level rise if they were to melt, causing catastrophic impacts for coastal communities around the world.

Climate and Average Weather Year Round in 15216 - Pittsburgh PA:

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Future heat waves of this magnitude could further weaken the continent’s ice, making it more susceptible to melting during subsequent warm periods. David Mikolajczyk, a research meteorologist with the Antarctic Meteorological Research and Data Center at the University of Wisconsin-Madison, warns that this could leave Antarctica less protected during its summer season.

Increased melting in Antarctica could also potentially disrupt global oceanic circulation patterns, which play a crucial role in maintaining the planet’s climate. “We are still in the early stages of understanding the full impact of this heat wave,” Thomas Bracegirdle, deputy science leader for the British Antarctic Survey’s Atmosphere, Ice and Climate team, told CNN. “At the moment, it’s just astonishing to witness what we’re seeing.”

Bracegirdle told CNN that the temperatures observed during this event were record-breaking and could signal future trends. While heat waves of this magnitude are rare in Antarctica and it’s uncertain if they are becoming more frequent, there is concern that this may change.

“All we can say at this stage is that increased high-temperature extremes are expected in Antarctica due to a changing climate, but we need further study to understand this particular event,” Bracegirdle said.

This heat wave also played a significant role in contributing to Earth’s hottest day on record in late June, according to the European Union’s Copernicus Climate Change Service.

This is the second major heat wave Antarctica has experienced in the past two years. The previous event in March 2022 saw temperatures soar up to 70 degrees above normal, marking the most extreme temperature deviations ever recorded in the region.

A 2023 study in Geophysical Research Letters found that climate change contributed 3.6 degrees of warming to that heat wave and could exacerbate similar events by 9 to 10.8 degrees Fahrenheit by 2100.

Weather Forecast For 55125-Saint-Paul-MN:

https://www.behance.net/gallery/201054649/Weather-Forecast-For-55125-Saint-Paul-MN

While this current heat wave has not reached the extreme temperature departures seen in 2022, it has been more widespread and prolonged, according to Ted Scambos, a glaciologist at the University of Colorado Boulder.

The key difference between the two events lies in atmospheric conditions.

“This is a very unusual event, from that perspective,” Bracegirdle noted, explaining that the ongoing heat wave is linked to a breakdown of the southern polar vortex. This atmospheric disruption, expected to occur only once every two decades on average, releases cold air trapped over Antarctica and allows warmer air to move in.

The southern polar vortex, which operates similarly to its northern counterpart by trapping cold air, is disrupted less frequently, making such heat waves rarer, according to Amy Butler, a research physicist at NOAA’s Chemical Sciences Laboratory.

The disruption of the polar vortex began in the latter half of July and is expected to continue into early August, with its peak intensity anticipated in about a week, Butler told CNN. This ongoing disruption is likely to keep surface temperatures elevated.

Simultaneously, multiple waves of warm air from the southwestern Indian Ocean have moved over East Antarctica, which covers about two-thirds of the continent. Each surge of warm air has been closely followed by another, resulting in nearly continuous warming over the past few weeks, according to Scambos.

East Antarctica, which includes the South Pole and is typically shielded from such extreme warmth, has experienced unusual temperatures during this event, as it did in 2022.

This pattern reflects a broader trend with already documented effects. From 1989 to 2018, the South Pole warmed at a rate more than three times the global average, according to a 2020 study published in Nature Climate Change.

While West Antarctica and its Thwaites “Doomsday” Glacier have drawn significant scientific attention due to their potential impact on sea level rise, recent research indicates that melting in East Antarctica, where this heat wave is occurring, is also becoming a major concern. See more:

https://weatherusa.app/zip-code/weather-19891

https://weatherusa.app/zip-code/weather-19892

https://weatherusa.app/zip-code/weather-19893

https://weatherusa.app/zip-code/weather-19894

https://weatherusa.app/zip-code/weather-19895

Recent warmth has posed a serious threat to Antarctica’s vital ice sheet. According to a 2019 study in Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, the continent lost 280% more ice mass in the 2000s and 2010s compared to the 1980s and 1990s.

“As recent events demonstrate, the rapid changes previously associated with the Arctic are now also occurring in Antarctica,” Mikolajczyk said. “This indicates that significant change can happen quickly in Antarctica as well.”

#usa #weather app #climate #forecast #Youtube

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jordandhallu · 8 months

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WBA TITLE SHOT UP FOR GRABS AS DAN AZEEZ TAKES ON JOSHUA BUATSI AT WEMBLEY ARENA

This Saturday, Dan Azeez will look to set up a world light-heavyweight title shot with current WBA Champion, Dmitry Bivol as he looks to secure his 21st victory and retain his unbeaten record in a final eliminator for the world title.

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Billed as the “Battle of South London”, Lewisham born Azeez will have to defend his British and Commonwealth titles in an exciting ‘friend turned foe’ showdown with Croydon’s own, Joshua Buatsi.

Buatsi, who is 17-0 and ranked #1 in the WBA rankings ahead of #2 Azeez, also comes into this fight having never experienced defeat and will look to get one over someone he once called a “good friend”.

‘Super’ Dan Azeez goes into this fight having won his previous bout against Frenchman, Khalid Graidia in Italy. Four months prior to that, saw him win the EBU European light-heavyweight title against Thomas Faure, in his opponent's home country of France. Many applaud the 34-year-old for rising up the ranks the “old-fashioned way” by winning domestic and European titles before stepping up to world level and he has continued to grow his fanbase over the years for his humble personality and ‘Marvelous’ fight style, after his idol, Marvin Hagler.

Wembley arena is a location he is familiar with, having fought there twice previously in 2021 & 2022, winning both by TKO. Questions remain on if he can get the job done again against what will comfortably be his most testing fight of his career so far.

Buatsi is also coming off impressive victories over Ricards Bolotniks, Craig Richards and Pawel Stepien, winning the latter two fights by unanimous decision. Unlike his opponent, he is yet to fight at Wembley arena and was probably not expecting the contest to be there due to the cancellation of their previous date at the O2 Arena, where he would have fought for the 8th time in his professional career.

Originally scheduled for the 21st of October, this bout had to be cancelled and rescheduled due to an injury sustained in Dan Azeez’s back on fight week. It has been said by Dan that he knew about this injury before it was announced but Buatsi only found out days before the event was expected to take place. Conspiracies have circulated online, at how this could have been a ploy to allow Azeez more time to prepare, but he has since said that it is untrue.

Speaking to Sky Sports, Joshua Buatsi explained how despite his knowledge of Dan, he was sceptical about the conspiracies.

“What do I think about the whole thing? The truth is, I’m not sure. From what I know with Dan, I don’t think he’d come and say he’s injured if he’s not.

“Do I think Dan was injured? Maybe, who knows?”.

All this has done is create an unexpected tension between the two fighters who have confronted each other on a number of occasions on the lead up to Saturday.

Azeez and Buatsi know each other very well and have openly revealed that they have sparred many times in the past. They have also shared the same experience of holding the British title at different stages of their career, but it will be Buatsi who will be looking to reclaim the prize.

It’s evident that the mood has changed between the two men since the build up to their originally scheduled fight last year, now becoming more contempt with taking the other fighter’s ‘0’ in their undefeated record. Some have claimed that the newly found rivalry has come at the hands of the promotor after not being able to sell enough tickets, which is why they moved from the O2 Arena to a venue with a lower capacity. However, what is promised is that fans will be treated to an exciting dust up between two hard-working fighters that believe they should be world champions.

Regardless on their relationship with each other, it’s clear to see that they are keen to dispatch of their opponent on Saturday night and move on without any hard feelings.

The OVO arena in Wembley will also welcome rising star and EBU European Super-Lightweight Champion, Adam Azim as he attempts to defend his title for the first time against the experienced, Enock Poulson. Controversial Olympic silver medallist, Ben ‘The Surgeon’ Whittaker is another growingly familiar name that will grace North-West London as he aims to take his record to 6-0 since turning professional in 2022. Highly favoured to become the next best female fighter, ‘Sweet’ Caroline Dubois returns to the ring following her unanimous decision win over Magali Rodriguez as she defends her IBO lightweight title for the first time. Also making up the rest of the card for Saturday is Francesca Hennessy, daughter of former boxing promotor, Mick who will be looking to dance and dazzle her way to the third victory of her promising career as well as heavyweight, Jamie TKV who will try to bounce back from the first loss of his career in September 2023.

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#boxing #journalism #boxxer #Sky Sports #AzeezBuatsi #Instagram

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supportingfire · 2 years

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" thoma, it's okay - really. " and it is, truly. a lot of time had passed since the days when they were reckless youths, playing, pretending they didn't have bigger responsibilities waiting for them. gone were the days when diluc would gaze longingly at jean, and thoma ; diluc, and ... kaeya ; thoma. childhood crushes were fleeting things after all, miracles if one got the chance to act on them. if anyone deserved a miracle, it was his brother. " charles probably thought you knew ! i'm sure he wouldn't have brought it up otherwise. he was used to me coming in , complaining about my latest infatuation. " it's awkward, and a tad vulnerable. and frostwind doesn't like it one bit. " i assure you that even back then , your companionship was too important for me to sabotage. it still is. now so more than ever. i needn't remind you that if anyone hurts diluc there would be hell to pay. don't think i'll go easy on you just because we're friends. "

he remembers what it was like, to be young and experiencing an emotion you thought was love for the first time. it was an important time in a kid's life, but it was also incredibly transitory. a stage of growth that lead to more permanent outcomes. did his fourteen-year-old self look at diluc and think, with dreamy sighs, they would be together forever? sure, maybe in his daydreams. but it wasn't until a decade later, when he returned a stronger man, was thoma able to make sense of it all. the first crush was important to figuring out who you were, but it didn't define it.

even with knowing that, thoma can't help the feel of guilt that has floated around his person since earlir that morning. since it was casually joked that the ragnvindr brothers both pined after the wrong person in their youth. thoma hadn't even seen it, too busy watching diluc chase jean…kaeya had been doing the same, but with him. how isolating must that have felt for a young man, just coming in to his own? thoma recalls the times they did spend together, when diluc was busy being the youngest knight the faction had ever seen; waiting up late at the winery for him to come home. whispering under pillow forts to not wake the maids. kaeya didn't indulge too often his personal shortcomings, even when they were kids, but every once in a blue moon…thoma would hear it. the longing to be as good as his brother. the desire to be favored. still just kids, thoma hadn't been sure how to help. he was struggling with his own hardships, after all. now and adult, he believes kaeya when captain says it was alright. time forever marched on, childhood crushes fizzled and withered.

but still. how lonely must kaeya have felt then? and then retainer left without much word...thoma feels a soft ache in his heart.

"i have always cherished our friendship, you know that," at least, thoma hopes the man does, "if i ever made you feel isolated, or rejected…i'm sorry. even though we were kids, i never wanted you to hurt. i…knew what that felt like. if i had known…" a pause. thoma isn't sure what to say. what would he have done had he known the truth? he was a child, the answer was hard to find. so he doesn't answer at all, not wanting to respond with something that might not have been truthful.

"i'm happy we're still friends. and i'm happy we get to be family…you don't have to worry about me, i think i'd sooner fall on my own spear than hurt diluc."

#ecleips #( ( answered #why DOES THIS MAKE ME SO SAD #even tho i know #kaeya is crushing albedo #UGH #diluc and kaeya were dumb #but so was thoma #everyone was a big giant love circle #UGH UGH #thx for the stab #loveu

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cromwellrex2 · 10 months

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The Third Civil War, August-September 1650: ‘all in disorder and running, both right wing and left.’

Dunbar: Cromwell’s Greatest Triumph

Highlander Pikemen at Dunbar by Graham Turner. Source: Warfare History Network website

WITH HIS unseemly betrayal of Montrose and, in effect the cause of High Church Scottish Royalism, Charles had given himself little choice but to accept wholeheartedly the requirements of the Scottish Committee of Estates and to relinquish Anglicanism. This conversion was not a happy one: Charles departed the Netherlands on 2nd June 1650, and when his ship was forced to dock in Helgoland, seeking refuge from Commonwealth naval pursuit, his accompanying Scottish commissioners required him to sign further binding conditions as sub clauses to the Treaty of Breda, confirming his adherence to Presbyterianism ‘in the presence of Almighty God.’ Charles was now effectively a theological prisoner of the Kirk. When Charles landed in Scotland he was immediately subjected to a regime of Puritan religious indoctrination, in an attempt to purge the young man of what the Covenanters believed were his Popish inclinations, inherited from both his father and his mother. Whereas Argyll’s government were determined to use the influence of their reluctant convert King to justify its suppression of all opposition to Presbyterianism within Scotland, it was not at this stage seeking to extend its creed to England, despite the terms of Breda and the Solemn League and Covenant. The English Commonwealth however were not so sanguine. For the Independents of the Rump Parliament and the New Model Army, the combination of ideological Puritanism with a Presbyterian version of Royalism was a potentially deadly threat, with the risk that any number of dissenters in England could rally to this new challenge to the still barely legitimate Commonwealth. The English Council of State believed a fourth Covenanter invasion of England was inevitable and it determined that the New Model Army should pre-empt this by invading Scotland first.

The command of the expedition was awarded to Oliver Cromwell, but not before a sincere attempt by both the Council of State and Cromwell himself to persuade the old warhorse Sir Thomas Fairfax to do so. Fairfax however declined. He was a reluctant supporter of the Commonwealth, having opposed the execution of Charles I, and was also a sincere Presbyterian who was genuinely troubled by Parliament’s reneging on its commitment to the Solemn League and Covenant: he could see no justification for an invasion of Scotland. On 22nd June, Fairfax, probably the most successful and influential Parliamentary commander of the civil wars, called a permanent end to his military career. Perhaps typically of this general, characterised as he was by his loyalty, dignity and humanity, his departure was prompted by a point of principle. He retired to his estates in Yorkshire, never to return to the political or military fray, his reputation intact.

Cromwell, the champion of religious toleration and opponent of Presbyterian fanaticism, had no such qualms. Promoted to Lord General by the Council, he was provided with an army of 16,000 men, a third of which was cavalry. It was a strong force but as importantly was the calibre of the officers Cromwell had recruited to his staff: Charles Fleetwood, John Lambert, Thomas Pride and George Monck were some of the best military men in the New Model Army, battle-hardened by the fighting in the two previous civil wars and in Ireland. Cromwell still hoped a peace could be negotiated and, once he reached Berwick, called on the Scots to renounce any attempt to invade England. The Scots, with an English army at their gates, unsurprisingly refused. Cromwell crossed the Tweed and into Scotland on 22nd July.

The Committee of Estates put an army of 20,000 in the field under the command of the experienced and capable David Leslie, a veteran of Marston Moor and Philiphaugh. His defence of Edinburgh, organised in a fortified line between the capital and Leith, proved effective against an initial English assault and Cromwell broke off hostilities, but this apparent strength was deceptive. The effective civil war that had overthrown the Engagers following the battle of Preston had led to much purging of Scottish military forces by the Kirk party and the replacement of experienced men with godly and enthusiastic, but poorly trained, replacements. The contradictions of Covenanter policy were also underlined when a visit by Charles to Edinburgh was enthusiastically received by many of the soldiers led to a further purge of 4,000 of the troops, suspected of recidivist Royalism, organised by the radical Presbyterian ministers embedded in the Scottish army.

Nonetheless, Cromwell still found it difficult to bring the cautious Leslie to battle. After a number of inconclusive skirmishes, the general withdrew to Dunbar. His army was wracked with dysentery at this point and by the end of August, his force had been reduced to no more than 12,000 effective fighting men. It began to look as if the Commonwealth’s pre-emptive action may well fail. Leslie sensed weakness and therefore moved his much larger force out of Edinburgh and looked to a pitched battle to defeat decisively the English invasion. Leslie occupied a strong defensive position overlooking Cromwell’s troops on Doon Hill, but urged on by his officers and the Presbyterian ministers, convinced the English were fatally vulnerable, the Covenanter general ordered an advance. As the Scottish forces streamed down Doon Hill towards him, Cromwell allegedly murmured to his officers: ‘God is delivering them into our hands, they are coming down to us.’ However at a subsequent council of war on horseback, Cromwell’s officers recommended that battle be avoided: that the infantry and artillery should be evacuated by sea and the cavalry should force its way south and both should then regroup in England.

Cromwell was not happy to take this advice. He had noticed that as it formed into position, the Scottish right flank was over-extended. In discussion with Lambert, he decided to reorientate his own army by focusing its strength, both cavalry and infantry, on the Parliamentary left, thereby dispensing with the traditional formations of strong infantry flanked by cavalry. This manoeuvring took place under cover of a rainy night, unobserved by a soaked Scottish enemy, confident that victory was already theirs. At dawn on 3rd September, the Commonwealth left, supported by artillery who had also moved into position overnight, assaulted an unsuspecting Scottish right flank, led by Lambert’s cavalry. This caused disarray until Leslie reinforced his right with cavalry and pikemen. Monck’s infantry were hard pressed and began to retreat back across the Broxburn River. Cromwell decided to throw in his reserves not to reinforce Monck, but to attack the stretched Scottish left. This caused complete confusion as Cromwell’s personal mounted guard crashed through the Covenanter ranks. When the Scottish cavalry broke, the battle was essentially over. In the rout that followed some 3,000 Scots were killed where they stood or in flight and some 10,000 were eventually made prisoner, offered the choice of military service in the army of their enemies or enslavement in the Caribbean. Cromwell had won possibly the greatest military victory of his career: it is little surprise that the Lord General took his extraordinary reversal of fortune at Dunbar as a sign of divine providence.

The battle of Dunbar, although ultimately decisive, was not the end of this third British civil war. Although Cromwell occupied Edinburgh on 7th September, Leslie, whose offer of resignation was rejected by the Committee of Estates, regrouped his surviving forces, numbering approximately 4,000, and took up strong defensive positions at Stirling. Cromwell, meanwhile, master of much that he surveyed, determined to finish the menace of the Solemn League and Covenant once and for all, by negotiating an end to militant Presbyterianism in Scotland, thereby also ending Scotland’s attempt to restore Charles II to his throne and any further threat to the integrity of the English Commonwealth.

#the battle of Dunbar #english civil war #third english civil war #war of the three kingdoms #Charles II #oliver cromwell

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thetoxicgamer · 2 years

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3 G2 Players Highlight 2023 Lec Winter Split All-Pro First Team Alongside League Newcomer and Accomplished Jungler

League of Legends players in Europe are getting set for the 2018 LEC Spring Split after a thrilling 2023 Winter Split. But to start off the new year, the league has given out awards to the top performers before the new season starts. The All-Pro First Team consists of three members from the championship-winning roster of G2 Esports, including mid laner Rasmus “Caps” Winther, ADC Steven “Hans Sama” Liv, and support Mihael “Mikyx” Mehle. The other side of Summoner’s Rift features LEC newcomer and Team Vitality top laner Kyeong “Photon” Gyu-tae and popular MAD Lions jungler Javier “Elyoya” Prades Batalla. G2’s trophy-winning run was only possible with the efforts of their most experienced players, even though their regular season didn’t stand out as much. When it mattered most, however, this trio of stars shined bright, with Caps, Hans Sama, and Mikyx all leading their respective roles in KDA by the end of the playoffs, according to competitive League stats aggregate Oracle’s Elixir. Vitality, on the other hand, might have dropped out of the playoff race early, but Photon impressed fans and analysts with his aggressive style of play. Through the regular season, he led all LEC top laners with 40 kills over nine games, with the highest average damage to champions per minute in the role too. Lastly, Elyoya stood out as a cornerstone for a shifting MAD Lions roster, even though he was relegated to Sejuani duty for a majority of the regular season and group stage. During the playoffs, however, he finally got a chance to do some damage on champions like Vi and Elise, leading all junglers with 40 kills, a 70.9 kill participation percentage, and 22.9 percent of his team’s total kills, according to Oracle’s Elixir. One standout individual in the two other All-Pro lineups is SK Gaming’s rookie marksman Thomas “Exakick” Foucou, who took over the regular season as one of the best players in the league. The 19-year-old was the driving force behind the organization’s best season performance since 2015, leading the regular season with 48 kills, a whopping 36.1 percent of his team’s total kills, and absolutely destructive early game stats. All of these star players will need to prepare quickly since the 2023 LEC Spring Split is scheduled to begin on Saturday, March 11. The action is ready to kick off once more, and like last season, every game will matter from the opening match to the last. Read the full article

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damiano-mylove · 3 years

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How the members of Måneskin would be while taking your virginity

Obvi NSFW, lil bit of swearing, but that's really it, I think *Masterlist*

Vic

Despite your potential nerves when telling Vic you were a virgin, Vic completely and totally accepted it

She wouldn't push sex stuff on you, but she would be beyond honoured that you wanted her to be your first time

That said, before the main course, Vic was asking if you were sure every 5 minutes, but you were sure, absolutely committed to her and you wanted to share with her, not only your heart, but your body too

Unless it happened in the heat of the moment, Vic would go out of her way to make it an event for you, because she never wanted you to regret it because she fumbled the bag

There would be scented candles all over, and she would wash her bedsheets during the day so that they were extra soft and clean for you - Vic would have bass heavy jazz in the background just to set the mood

It would be very slow, starting with kissing that was prompted by you, then a bit of over the clothes stuff that you'd done a couple times before

Things got naturally heavier until things reached their full potential

It was sweet, and gentle, and everything you'd expected (which you'd almost hadn't expected)

After the fact, your relationship stayed mostly in the same place, but you two entered the honeymoon stage where you'd be fucking every chance you got - Vic assured you that that was natural and you shouldn't feel embarrassed about it

You felt more accepted than ever before, just because Vic took you as you were and made you feel like perfection personified

Thomas

There was no big talk when you revealed to him that you a virgin, it sort of came out after both of you were already laying on the bed, slick with sweat and the smell of sex heavy in the room

It never came up in conversation, and you were just going with the flow of the night - and at risk of the revelation ruining the moment, you kept it to yourself

Sex with Thomas was sloppy, it was full of bitten back moans, full of praises, full of gripping at each other and scratching each other

It was genuine and worth the wait

When you told Thomas, his reaction was laughter, then he said, 'Could've fooled me, my love of loves.'

You both chuckled at the comment before Thomas asked if you were serious, to which he told you that he was happy that you let him be the one to take your card

The honeymoon period after that was an absolute exploration of each other; bodies, turn-ons, turn-offs. It was an experimentation period, that neither of you judged the other for - boundaries were set and things were found out

Thomas was a sweet lover, always allowing himself to be vulnerable with you and being more patient than you ever could've asked for

Ethan

Telling Ethan that you were a virgin was right before sex, which had him pause everything for just a second

'We don't have to do anything you don't want to.'

Those were the first words out of his mouth, to which you told him you wanted him to fuck you into next week - Ethan asked if you were sure, then all bets were off

The moment returned in the snap of your fingers, with Ethan pining you back against the bed, into feather filled pillows

Ethan held back a bit, sure. He didn't want to hurt you, to potentially ruin your first time

The scene was entirely in your hands, with a bit of guidance from Ethan, who was slightly more experienced than you - but Ethan had you in the driver's seat, ready to discern what you wanted to have happen

It was sweet, it was full of love and explosive passion, with acceptance, with just a slight amount of confusion and testing

Afterwards, Ethan asked for your full review, which you gladly gave him, and then you fell asleep, wrapped in his arms, with your legs tangled together

The honeymoon period was so extreme that the other band members actually started to wonder where and why the fuck Ethan was staying home so much - and you were the answer, because you were Ethan's favourite answer

Damiano

In lieu to Damiano asking you if you were sure you wanted him to be your first, he told you 'You don't want me, Y/n. You deserve to give that to someone way better than me.'

You were disappointed to be shot down in a way that was so fueled by Damiano's own self-consciousness

It took a few days for both of you to bounce back to normal after that, but once you did, it was like nothing ever happened, which was really what you were hoping for

Gradually, you and Damiano began to work your way up to doing away with the stupid social construct of virginity - always just turning the dial up notch by notch, slowly but surely

On the night where the jackpot was hit, Damiano tried to make it as nice as he could

He'd take you out to a very nice date first, but by the time you returned back to his place, you two were all over each other, pushing each other against walls and walking with your hands all over each other

The anticipation of the main moment was what made it only that much more special, and it was exactly as you imagined it

Your honeymoon period was shorter than most, but only because Damiano loved to tease you, to make you wait, instead of sneaking off with you - that is, until you started to learn how to tease him back

Once that ground was established, you two had the best sex life int he entire world, without competition

tell me if it sucks

#måneskin #maneskin #vic de angelis #victoria de angelis x reader #victoria de angelis #victoria maneskin #thomas raggi #thomas raggi x reader #thomas maneskin #ethan torchio #ethan torchio x reader #ethan maneskin #damiano david #damiano #damiano david x reader #damiano x reader #damiano maneskin #x reader

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ptergwen · 4 years

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from one kid to another

w/c: 6.0k

warnings: mentions of drinking, lots of swearing, implied smut, and angst at times

summary: it was a mistake, a beautiful one that you didn’t make on your own

a/n: this genuinely is my favorite thing i’ve ever written :,) i say that a lot but this time i mean it, it’s really special i think and i so so so hope y’all do too <3 enjoy my loves

there’s only one thing in life that testing positive for is actually positive.

depending on the situation, obviously. yours isn’t ideal, or planned or a blessing or whatever people say. it’s a gigantic mistake that you didn’t realize you made until a minute ago.

you’d noticed something was wrong when your time of the month came and all you experienced was the symptoms. cramps, cravings, everything except your actual period. as everyone is pretty much taught to do, you ran to the closest drug store for a pregnancy test. what the hell else could it be? you messed around a few weeks ago, so there’s a possibility.

your heart felt like it was going to explode out of your chest the whole time you waited for the results. you’d thought of calling tom over for support, but there are a couple of reasons why you couldn’t do that. you realized you made the right decision when your timer for the test went off.

two red lines. you’re pregnant. you’re pregnant, and your best fucking friend is the father.

where do you go from here?

the test falls from your hand and hits the floor with a mocking clank. you slide down until your back is against the bathtub. well, you’re fucked. what an ironic word choice.

the fact that you aren’t ready in the slightest to be a parent when you’re still growing up yourself is one thing. it’s another that this could ruin the most important relationship you’ve ever had.

no, tom won’t be mad. he’s never once fought with or even raised his voice at you. in your times of need, he’s been the one to uplift you and kiss your puffy cheeks dry. no matter how he takes this, you know it won’t be out on you. he is half responsible.

but, with how you left things the last time you spoke, you’re not sure you’ll be able to get past it.

tom is alarmingly good at hiding how he truly feels. you always tease him that it’s because he’s a gemini. he’ll come back with shut up, i’m an actor and stick his nose in the air to give you the full image. in all seriousness, it does take a toll on how well he can communicate.

you’ve seen it in small ways, like when he brings you along for press days and uses unenthusiastic smiles to cover up his yawns. how he’ll be polite in a conversation with people he’d rather not speak to, then mumble about it once you’re home. he tries to put forward the “appealing” parts of himself even though he’s more than them.

tom’s biggest communication issue is that he’s been in love with you since year nine and hasn’t said a word about it. you’ve yet to figure that one out.

you two became friends while tom was starring in billy elliot. his schedule was so scattered between shows and school, so he struggled to balance both. he often had to stay late for extra help on the lessons. you’d also been there a few times. you worked better in the classroom, and he was grateful he didn’t have to be alone with the teacher.

most kids made fun of tom for his interest in theater, to his face and behind his back. not you. you thought it was just incredible that someone in your own classes worked at the west end. you’d told him on your way home one night.

he’d heard you before he saw you. “you’re tom, right?” you asked from behind him, the two of you making your way through the hall. the question sounded friendly, and it wasn’t every day kids were nice to him. tom stopped walking so you could catch up. “yes, and you are?” you gave him a small smile, books clutched to your chest. he instantly returned it.

“y/n. i heard you’re in billy elliot?” you laughed at your understatement, then corrected yourself. “that you are billy elliot, i mean. that’s so cool.” “oh, i am. thank you,” he chuckled back, a full grin taking over his face. you were both walking again, you by tom’s side. “i was hoping to come see you soon.” your voice got quieter as you told him, like you were nervous.

tom never had much luck with girls, not at this point in his life. this was an opportunity to change that. at the very least, to make a new friend. he offered something you said yes to without a beat of hesitation. “what if i got you the tickets?”

from then on, you began talking during class and not only when it ended. tom really knew how to keep the conversation going, telling story after story that left you laughing so much your teacher would shush you. you’d eventually moved to hangouts at either of your houses. harrison came into the mix at some point, the three of you forming your own group.

the difference between tom and harrison was that while harrison linked with other girls, tom was only interested in you. he’d gotten a crush on you pretty fast, if he was being honest. it might have been your shared sense of humor or the way you said his name.

thomas, when he was being cheeky. tommy, which took the place of a pet name. even regular tom. that might have been his favorite. he loved how it rolled off your tongue. he loved, and still loves, you.

you’d gone to all of tom’s performances you possibly could, the ones for school theater included. you also gave him the push to take his talents to hollywood. tom was afraid he wasn’t cut out for the big screen, that he needed more practice and experience first. you told him that if this was what he wanted to do, he had to start somewhere. why wait?

tom then landed his first movie role in the impossible at the age of fifteen. he’d received tons of praise and almost gotten nominated for an academy award, all because you convinced him to audition. you played a huge part in keeping him grounded when he was between films, and caught him up on whatever schoolwork he’d missed.

you practically zoomed to tom’s house when he was announced as the next spider-man. you’d been constantly refreshing every social media platform marvel was on since tom became a finalist for the part. that process was probably the most difficult experience he’s ever gone through. you’d know, having heard all about it from tom.

the two of you celebrated along with the rest of tom’s family that night. you kept giving him little proud of you squeezes on his shoulder or knee. tom is eternally indebted to you for being the most supportive of everything he does.

he of course sends the support right back. although he went down the movie star path, acting wasn’t for you. you’d gone off to university and studied hard as hell and aced all your shit. tom quizzed you on material whenever you needed. he wanted to help you somehow, and this was all you’d let him do.

he’d offered to pay off your loans and any other expenses necessary because he had the money to do that now. you refused every single time, not trying to become dependent on him. he admired your drive, yet hated it at the same time. everything you’d done for him, it was his turn to be the caretaker. it should’ve been.

whenever tom wrapped filming for the holidays and came back home, you were always preparing for final exams. he kept you company, content with simply being in your presence. you typed away on your keyboard and read over notes until your eyes burned. tom occasionally brought you snacks, tea, asked how you were and what he could do.

sometimes, he would have to cut your study time short. he’d say it wasn’t healthy or you were overdoing it and to come relax with him for a bit. other times, tom let you be. he didn’t want to get in the way of your already stressful assignments. those were the nights you’d fall asleep in front of your laptop. drool on your chin, hunched over at your desk.

tom made sure to tuck you in, press a light kiss to whatever part of your face wasn’t covered in spit, then let himself out. he knew where your spare key was, so he used that. you’d wake up to a “Fell asleep studying again. Rest today x” text the next morning.

when it came time for you to graduate, tom was on the first flight there. it was during another round of reshoots for chaos walking. he respectfully told doug that he’d have to work around his schedule or replace him, which couldn’t be done so late into filming. tom didn’t care that it made him seem like a prick. he was getting to you no matter what he had to do.

he’d earned plenty of stares and whispers from people as he took his seat in the crowd. he was a proper celebrity now, so he expected it. his solution was to ignore everything and chat with your family about how proud they were of you, tom the most. he saw you go from a kid attempting algebra equations to an adult at her uni graduation. you’ve really grown up together.

it was why he teared up hearing them call your name, seeing you beam as you walked across the stage. your mom grabbed his hand and nodded at him, like she could tell exactly what was going through his head.

you ran right up to tom after the ceremony was over, leaping into his arms. he let out a couple of chuckles as he spun you around. “i didn’t think you’d make it,” you’d admitted, happy yet sad tears in your eyes. tom put you down so he could pull you in for a real hug. “i’ll always be wherever you are, y/n,” he said into your ear, rocking you while you gripped at his suit collar.

flash forward to a year later, your career is finally taking off, tom’s is flourishing like it has been for years, and you’re pregnant with his child. you’re trying to recall the series of events that led you to this moment.

you were both drunk, blackout drunk because the only reason you remember sleeping together is that you woke up naked in the same bed. harrison’s bed.

he threw a housewarming party for himself, having recently moved out of tom’s and the other boys’ place. the three of them, sam, and you were all in attendance, along with a lot of others you hadn’t met.

neither you nor tom could figure out where he knew all those people from. he’d clinged to you two for the most part, more so you now with tom usually away. they could have been from work. harrison is breaking into the business himself, small roles here and there. tom actually met him in your school’s theater program, then he introduced him to you, ten years ago already.

sam entertained himself by making concoctions with the snacks harrison set out. harry got together a playlist for the party. harrison and tuwaine struck up a conversation with some of harrison’s actor friends. that left you and tom alone, out of stuff to do, and with one way to fix it.

“drink?” tom had asked you, a smirk playing on his lips. “love one,” you hummed back and set off for the kitchen. the two of you raided harrison’s liquor cabinet, grabbing his biggest bottle of wine. he’d dumbly pointed it out during the house tour he gave you before the other guests arrived.

you were about to search for glasses, but tom’s fingers threaded through yours. he gently tugged you away and nodded behind him. “let’s bring this upstairs. seems much more fun there,” he’d murmured over the music, a grin breaking across your face.

tom is big on clubbing and socializing, however, you aren’t. he comes up with ways to get you out of these events, just in case.

“we can break in harrison’s bed for him,” you said as a completely harmless joke, no intentions of that becoming your reality later on. spoiler alert: it did. “and how are we gonna do that?” tom quirked a suggestive eyebrow and breathed out a laugh as you dragged him towards the stairs. despite yourself, you’d giggled at his words.

not one drink in either of you yet, and you were stumbling and cracking up as you ran upstairs. you’d pulled tom by your still attached hands into what you remembered as harrison’s room. tom shut the door, locked it, saying under his breath that would be a “convenient investment” for him to make as well.

he took out a bottle opener that he must have put in his pocket at some point and got to work on your wine, you getting comfortable on the new mattress. the two of you passed it to the other after every sip, tom licking the taste of your lip gloss off his own lips every so often.

the equivalent of three drinks in, you were making out. both of you were just tipsy at this point, tom holding you by your hips as you lied down, your legs around his waist. god, he could’ve done this sober. he’d dreamed about kissing you, really kissing you since he was fourteen. you’d always felt like you two had something more. ah, there it was.

halfway through the bottle got you past the next two bases, and you were ready for the fourth and ultimate one by the time you shook the last few drops onto the tip of your tongue. tom groaned at the sight of that, drawing your half naked body in closer to his.

you two had forgotten to use protection in each of your drunken states. without a doubt, you both would’ve agreed to a condom had your minds not been everywhere but where they should have.

you’d woken up first the morning after, panic immediately coursing through your veins thicker than blood. a fully nude and sleeping tom had you in his embrace, arms secured around your middle, facing you. you gasped when you made the connection, loudly enough to wake tom up. his long eyelashes tickled your face, a confused pout on his lips. uh... um...

“did we fucking...” you trailed off, no words to describe whatever unfolded. “fuck?” tom finished for you. a very blunt explanation, but true nevertheless. “looks like it,” he rasped, pout changing into a smile. your face fell at the vague memories of how you spent your night.

you definitely wanted to do it. just, he’s your best friend, who’s seen you at your least sexy moments over the years. when you were sick, had breakdowns from stress, you name literally anything, tom was there. it took one bottle of cheap wine for him to forget that?

the real answer was no. tom is entirely in love with you, for a decade at that. you were beginning to discover you feel the same, only you had no idea he already loves you. you’d assumed this was meant to be merely a hookup. from the frown your face held, he’d thought you were regretting it. oh, were you both so wrong.

“um... we don’t have to talk about it,” tom told you halfheartedly, under the impression that’s what you preferred. you physically felt yourself get weaker in tom’s strong arms. he’s not interested. “yeah, that’s probably for the best. i...” you were lying. his heart shrunk, shriveled up inside his chest. she doesn’t love me like that.

“you have to go. aren’t you behind on some emails?” tom hoped you didn’t hear his voice strain from the tears pushing at his eyes. “right. almost forgot, thanks.” you’d plastered on a smile, slipping out of his grasp. a tear rolled down his cheek, so he wiped it away before you noticed. you’d already gotten out of the bed and begun picking your clothes up off the floor.

“i’ll drive you home, then.” he rolled on to his other side, you thought so he could give you privacy to change. it was that, and also because he was crying. he couldn’t hold it in. tom is naturally an emotional person. imagine finding out the love you’ve had almost half your life is unreciprocated. it’s soul crushing.

you two found harrison snoring and on top of tuwaine as you left the house. no silly remarks or shared glances for the first time in ten years. tom couldn’t muster anything up, and you felt numb.

the drive was painful. you’d said your goodbyes after tom pulled up to the curb, which held an odd weight to them. once you were out of the car, a sob wracked through him, banging on the steering wheel and not giving a shit about the loud horn going off. you collapsed face first onto your bed. hours passed by while you stared at nothing and contemplated everything.

since it happened, you haven’t spoken much. small talk over text every few days or so, both of you pretending things are normal for the other’s sake. about a month later, today, is when you found out you’re pregnant.

there’s no use wallowing in any of this. you need to figure out your next move, one that should probably involve tom. first, you want to talk to someone else. you want other opinions and a voice in your head that isn’t your own. harrison gets a text from you saying to come over now, the now in all caps. he does.

you let him in after the second knock, his eyebrows furrowing in concern. however torn you are, you must look it. shirt balled in your fists, lip quivering. he keeps his eyes on yours as he steps inside, pushing the door shut behind him. this is all becoming too real. “y/n, are you okay?”

you’re about to cry in three, two...

“haz, i fucked up,” you choke out, tears unable to stay at bay. he takes you into his arms for a hug. half your face is hidden in his shoulder, hands clutching at his back. he lets you cry it out, holding you until your heavy breathing steadies. “what’s happened?” harrison asks quietly, both of you leaving the hug.

“if- if i tell you, you can’t freak out. you can’t tell anyone else, either,” you instruct, searching his eyes for certainty that he won’t under any circumstances. “i won’t, y/n/n,” he assures you and puts an encouraging hand on your arm. your heart pounding abnormally fast, you spit it out. your first time saying it aloud. “i’m pregnant.”

harrison flinches and doesn’t even try to conceal it. he takes his hand off of you, worry swimming across his features. he blinks at you, unsure of what to say. you’d react the same way, maybe worse, so you don’t blame him. a discussion you, him, and tom had a couple years back replays in his mind.

the three of you were talking about your futures, seeing as you were close to living them. when tom asked you two where you stood on having your own families, you didn’t hesitate to answer. “nope, the factory is closed for a long ass time.” until you were in your thirties, you aimed to focus on yourself. harrison distinctly remembered because of how you phrased it.

“you’re... you... wow,” is all he replies with. you head over to the couch, more tears welling up in your eyes. do the pregnancy hormones act up this early? harrison follows you over and sits down next to you with an awkward clearing of his throat. “do you want to be pregnant?” he has to ask because he’s not sure if he should congratulate you or what.

“i don’t know,” you answer honestly, voice airy. your eyes are fixed on the wall in front of you. you haven’t given yourself time to think about it. there are so many reasons you don’t, and a single one you do. “do you, um, know who the dad is?” harrison glances over at you. “yeah.” your voice cracks. you’re both afraid for him to ask what he does next.

he shifts so he’s sitting up. “can i know?” a sniffle passing through you, you finally look at him. “it’s tom,” you say it before you lose the nerve to. harrison’s face doesn’t change this time. he isn’t surprised you and tom went there. he’d seen your friendship growing into more the older you all got. what he can’t believe is where it took you.

his best friend pregnant, and his other best friend responsible for it.

“when did you...” “at your party,” you explain, bringing your legs up so they’re criss cross on the couch. “i thought you were gone a little too long.” he says that to try cheering you up. you appreciate the effort, but it doesn’t work. you’re not in a joking mood. he’ll stick to the main issue. “so, have you told him?”

“clearly not,” you scoff, not at him but at what you two have gotten yourselves into. “y/n... i think you should tell him,” harrison sighs out, then adds, “whether you keep it or not.” “why? that would ruin everything, it already has.” you’re getting angry now, which plunges you into angry crying, voice unsteady as you go on.

“the last time i saw tom was that night, and i guess it meant more to me than it did to him because we haven’t talked about it at all. he didn’t want to.” you swipe the back of your hand across your eyes, gaze stern compared to harrison’s soft one.

he drapes an arm around your shoulders, you curling into him with another sniffle. he doesn’t say anything for a minute, then he tries again. “i know you, y/n, and i know tom. you’ll kill yourselves not talking about this.” he’s right, no shit he is. avoiding telling tom how you feel, and your pregnancy on top of that, it’s eating you up inside. it’s swallowing you whole.

“what if he doesn’t want to be a dad? or- or i’m a shit mum?” you croak out, your doubts getting the best of you. “i can barely take care of myself. what am i supposed to do with a baby?” you’re leaning forward with your hands pressing into your temples. harrison’s hand moves to your upper back. “i- i don’t think i should have them. i... we can’t,” you conclude.

“tom loves kids,” he gives you a gentle reminder. “why would his own be the exception?” another good point, yet you still have rebuttles. “right, he’s a godfather and he’s really good with them and all that, but i’m not the right person, and it’s a terrible time,” you tell him all at once, in a rush to get your words out before harrison’s sway you.

“he’s never around, i’m doing my own stuff. we’re not meant for this.” you lift your head out of your hands and sit back on the couch. harrison returns his hands to his lap. he’s frowning at you, which you see from the corner of your eye. “i’m not going to force you to have the baby. just saying you have options.”

yeah, really shitty ones.

“either way, talk to tom.” harrison says this more like a demand so you’ll take his advice into actual consideration. “at least about the hookup.” your teeth sink into your lower lip, eyes watering for the nth time already.

you have no choice because he’s right again. you’ll never move on from what happened unless you and tom address it.

the next morning, you do what harrison told you to and invite tom over. he replied saying he was on his way maybe a minute later. he’s nervous to see you because yeah, but more so looking forward since it’s been so long. you’re so nauseous you barely have room for nerves. it’s morning sickness with a hint anxiety.

it feels almost normal when he first gets here, no how’ve you been and what are you up to these days? being as close as you and tom are, you’re not capable of such a dry conversation. personally, you still feel uneasy while he recounts a golfing incident him and harry got into the other day. you know something he doesn’t.

“when i tell you we flew, we flew,” tom makes a pushing forward motion with both hands. “right into the tree. i think harry, like, dented part of his face.” he lets out a breathy laugh, you forcing out one of your own. you’d be more interested without the fact that you’re expecting a child, his child, at the back of your mind.

tom exhales, shifting to face you on your couch. it’s funny how different things were when you and harrison sat in these same spots yesterday. so much has and is about to change.

“they had to send another golf cart to come get us. it was wild.” “it sounds wild,” you hollowly agree. he can tell you’re not too invested in hearing about harry’s terrible driving skills, so he changes the subject. “anyway, harrison told me he came over last night?” your stomach drops, heat coming over your whole body.

“did... did he say why?” you murmur with a look of urgency in your eyes. tom shrugs a shoulder, and casually. there’s no way he knows. “no, was he supposed to?” his tone stays playful, which you can thankfully tell. that puts you more at ease. “no. no, never mind. i would’ve asked you to come, but...” you’re searching through your catalog of excuses.

thank god tom says something else because you can’t find a good one. “it’s alright. i actually, um, had a work call.” a small smile spreads across his face, a proud one. intrigued, you raise both eyebrows. “what’d you talk about?” tom twiddles with his fingers in his lap. “i’ve been offered an audition for this really amazing film. everything works out, it’ll be huge for me.”

you’re smiling back this time, putting a hand over one of his. “woah, that’s incredible. i’m so happy for you, tom.” you lock your fingers with his from the back of his hand. he looks down at them, humbly shaking his head. “when is it?” “a few weeks from today. it films in brazil...”

oh. you can’t tell him now. it’s not worth him missing out on a milestone in his career for a baby you’re not sure you should have. that would be so unfair of you to ask. what are you going to do, not support his dreams for the first time in a literal decade? and, you’d call yourself his best friend through it all?

you guess this also means the way you feel about tom is one sided. he’s okay with leaving you after the most intimate moment you two have ever shared. you’ll dance around it the rest of your lives. better yet, act like the night never even happened. that’s not so easy to do when you’ve got a permanent reminder of it.

the thought makes you sick to your stomach. so sick, you could...

while tom is talking more about what the audition entails, you suddenly bolt up from the couch. you run for the bathroom, a hand cupped over your mouth. his face twists up in confusion from your disappearance. tom calls, “y/n/n?” out to you, but you can’t respond because your head is in the toilet. he rushes in when he hears you retching.

he gets onto the floor with you. you’re bent over, puking your guts out, back in another place where your life changed forever less than twenty four hours ago. tom pulls your hair out of your face and into a makeshift ponytail with one hand, his other on your back. that’s all you have in you. you stay over the toilet just to be sure.

saliva drips from your mouth, making you cough roughly, the sound echoing. tom moves so he’s next to you, keeping his hand in your hair and not caring one bit about the smell because he loves you and he’s utterly concerned about what he witnessed.

“love, are you sick?” he coos, searching for your eyes. they water from the intensity of everything. “morning sickness,” you answer without thinking first. shit. shit, shit, shit. it came out of you like more vomit, word vomit. there’s no going back now.

tom lets go of your hair with his eyes still on yours. his hand on your back then leaves you, fingers trailing down your body as they go. “morning sickness,” he repeats, putting it together. “you’re pregnant?” guilt taking over your features, you sit across from tom. you’re once again leaning against the bathtub, him against the counter.

“this isn’t how i wanted you to find out,” you admit and bring your knees up to your chest. “i took a test yesterday. it was positive.” your arms wrap around your legs, you now tearing up because tom figured it out. a shaky breath passes his lips. “i haven’t gone to my doctor or anything yet, but i-“

“are you keeping the baby?” tom cuts in. not to judge you for your choice, to find out what the fuck is going on before he travels across the world. you tighten your arms around yourself, grabbing your wrist. “i haven’t decided.” he gives you an understanding nod and reaches out for you. you dodge him. he might not want to do that after what you say next.

“tom, i... there’s more,” you whimper out. “yeah. i’m... i’m listening,” tom croaks, unable to hold in his infinite amount of emotions for a multitude of reasons. he’s losing you a second time. more tears spill from your eyes as you break the news, the news that will destroy what he’s been working towards his entire life.

“the baby is yours.” his face relaxes, looking almost relieved when you confess it. “when we slept together, uh,” you’re sure it’s obvious enough that you don’t have to go over the details. he’s tearing up himself. you reluctantly continue. “if you still want to audition, i get it. we don’t have to do this.”

“fuck the audition. fuck the whole movie. all of my movies, really,” tom surprises you by blurting out. he moves in until your legs are touching. “i’m staying. even if you don’t have the baby, i have to be here.” you watch in disbelief as he wipes away what are actually happy tears. “really? i was scared you’d resent me for it, or hate me even,” you mumble to him.

“y/n, what? why would i ever do that?” tom places a hand on your cheek, touch gentle and filled with love. you part your legs so he can be closer to you. he takes the space between them, thumb brushing over your skin. “i didn’t think you’d want to deal with all of this. i thought that night was only a hookup for you.” your voice wobbles under his gaze.

“no, are you kidding? i thought that’s what you thought.” he’s smiling now, eyes twinkling along with it. what he’s been meaning to tell you since you were only kids finally comes out. “i’ve loved you as long as i’ve known you, y/n. i always imagined myself doing this with you.” his words draw a quiet laugh from you, a happy one. “i know we were drunk, but i meant it all.”

the sincerity in his voice, the warmth in his eyes, they make you cry all over again. you’re getting used to it.

“i love you, tom,” you lean into him with a sniffle and a grin, his forehead now resting on yours, using his thumb to catch one of your tears. “i really do.” “i love you forever. i always have,” tom speaks lowly, breath fanning across your face. your hands grab at his shoulders. “so, you’ll stay? you’ll do this with me?” he reminds you of what he said before, this time a promise.

“forever.”

you ended up having the baby, and tom held your hand through the entire labor. nikki was holding his other hand, your mom holding your other hand. harrison had originally been in the room as well. when you started to push, he got freaked out and had to leave. your support system remained strong either way.

despite his repulsion of your daughter’s birth, you and tom decided to make harrison her godfather. he eventually became the godfather of your other two children also, which you had a few years later.

tom took a paternity leave from the industry so he could be with you and jamie. he’d also used his time off to propose to you, something else he fantasized about since year eleven in school. it wasn’t anything too grand because the whole world was already buzzing about you two, and a big gesture felt too impersonal with everything you’d been through together.

he did it in the form of passing a note, something you often did in class to avoid being scolded by your teacher for talking. the note came with a pencil to check off either the yes or no box, “will you marry me?” written above them. anyone else would have found it so unromantic, but you giggled as you checked off yes before your lips crashed into his smiling ones.

you were married shortly after the proposal, jamie as your flower girl and all your friends and family in attendance.

to do what he loved and stay with the people he loved, tom created his own version of hollywood in london. he took it upon himself to assemble a team and make a production company. harry behind the camera, harrison and tuwaine in the films, and tom either starring alongside them or directing. they give so many young actors tons of opportunities.

you eventually went back to work, too. it was like you’d never left, coworkers offering endless hugs and going over what you missed, not that you struggled getting into it. tom was there to celebrate every promotion, every compliment from your boss, every part of your life. jamie was also there, then liam and lucy.

all three of them are running around the house right now, putting on shoes and collecting their supplies for school. you take a sip of the orange juice liam didn’t finish with a lighthearted eye roll. tom chuckles as he passes you in the kitchen, getting the kids’ lunchboxes for them to minimize the chaos.

“you have that pitch meeting today, right?” he slips his hands through the lunchbox handles and walks over to you. “mhm,” you hum, mouth full with juice. his lips press to your temple, giving your waist a one handed squeeze. “you’ll smash it. always do.” “thanks, tommy.” putting down the cup, you reach up to button whatever parts of his shirt he didn’t have time to.

“aren’t you doing a casting? for the new script they sent?” you wonder aloud and smooth down the cotton material. “me and harry. should be interesting,” he remarks, you giving him a quick kiss back on his chin. they tend to have their artistic differences. “good luck with that. you do drop off, i’ll do pick up?” you pat one of the lunchboxes around his arms.

“deal.” tom goes in for a kiss on your lips, then a chorus of dad, we have to go led by jamie rings through the house. with a knowing smile, you push at his chest. “see you later. love you.” “love you, holland,” he bites back a grin of his own. his last name, now yours, suits you perfectly.

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