#though 6 did not disappoint in the slightest

[silverselfshippingchaos]

tumblr really has it out for me huh?

[wheeboo]

to love and be loved | jeon wonwoo

SYNOPSIS. in which wonwoo tells you about his first (and only) love. PAIRING. jeon wonwoo x gn!reader GENRE. fluff, hurt/comfort, friends to lovers WARNINGS. self-doubt talk on reader's end, self-indulgent wooweee, this was painfully hard to write lmao n have no idea if any of this makes sense WORD COUNT. 1.6k

requested from anon: Hiiiiiiii first of all congratssss for you 2k. For the event, ive been thinking the same exact story with wonwoo and #6 from list 3 - #6: “You’re not hard to love, nor are you unlovable. You just… Need to let me in, and let me show you you’re just as worthy of love as anyone else is.”

notes: i'd quite literally do anything to have these kinds of talks with wonwoo ☹️☹️. anyway i hope u all enjoy this <3 hits close to home >< tysm anon hehe <3

join the 2k celebration!

"Hey, uh, Wonwoo?"

"Mhm?"

"...have you ever been in love?"

A cricket chirps into the evening air right after you ask, and you suddenly feeling like you're holding in a long-winded breath. Then you hear a loud crunch by Wonwoo from the crackers he was snacking on, and you blink up to him wiping away the corner of his mouth. There's the slightest glimpse of a curve to his lips that you manage to catch.

He silently offers you a cracker in your direction, the anticipating silence between the two of you growing thickly. You take the cracker from his hand, muttering a quiet thanks, before nibbling on it absentmindedly.

The night is absolutely beautiful right now, swearing that you could spot and make out the constellations above if you squinted hard enough. The distant chirping of crickets is the only sound that breaks the silence as the coolness of the night rolls in, carrying with it slight breeze that whispers through the leaves overhead the balcony of your apartment.

"I have."

You swiftly turn your head to him, eyes widening intriguingly. "You have?"

The chuckle that leaves him is somewhat awkward, a tad bit hesitant. He crumples up the bag of crackers and sets it aside, chugging down the last sips of his drink and setting down the empty can as well.

"Did you... ever confess to them?" You ask, suddenly feeling curious, though there's a bit of disappointment at the tip of your tongue.

You swear you could see the thoughts swirling around his head. Wonwoo keeps his eyes fixed up to the night sky. There's a distant look in his eyes, as though he's peering into some past moment that only he can see, before he shakes his head, a faint smile crossing over his lips.

"No, I didn't," he answers calmly. "They were too far away, so... I just chose to admire them at a distance."

You lean back against the wall behind, your shoulder momentarily brushing against his. "Did they know you?"

Wonwoo purses his lips together. "Mhm."

"Well, you missed your chance!" You exclaim, prodding him playfully with your elbow. "I can't believe you let them get away, dude. Like right through the little cracks of your fingers. You could've been in a relationship by now."

This earns you a low, playful scoff from Wonwoo. "Are you assuming that they loved me back?"

Immediately, you feel the heat crawl up your neck and to the tips your ears.

"Well, um... Yeah, I am," You admit sheepishly, letting out a small sigh. "I mean, who wouldn't fall for a guy like you? You're nice and... charming. I think anyone would be lucky to be loved by you."

There's a silence that falls between the two of you, one simply more than just comfortable yet denser than ever, because the thought of being loved by Wonwoo seems to linger longer than you notice. You steal a glance at him, seeing his face still turned upwards towards the night sky and the moonlight reflecting on his glasses. Strands of his dark hair blow across his forehead in the breeze. You can't quite decipher his expression, but a flicker of something𑁋perhaps surprise, maybe even amusement𑁋dances on his features for a brief moment.

He finally turns back to you, a small, hesitant smile playing on his lips. "You think so?"

"Yeah," You confirm, nodding lightly. "Absolutely."

Wonwoo still keeps his eyes on you as you glance away, seeing the way you fidget with your hands in your lap and smoothing out the creases in your pants nervously. He glances down at his own hand and back at yours, lips pursing together in contemplation, but only folds his fingers back together the second you reach over him to grab the crumpled-up bag of crackers. He feels a little bit too warm in his sweater right now.

"Are you okay?" he asks.

A crunch echoes through the air. Then another. And another.

"I've just been kinda... thinking a lot lately, I guess," You reply slowly, quietly. "And it sort of makes me sound desperate in a way, but there are times I just wonder if, um... if anyone has ever felt the same way about me."

Wonwoo tilts his head slightly. "Love?"

"Not just love, but... seeing me, you know?" Being able to talk about this out loud makes your chest feel heavy. "Since it's hard these days to find someone who sees you for who you are, not for who you can be. I... I just feel like I'm hard to love sometimes. Hell, maybe even unlovable. It’s hard to break out of that mindset when things get hard again.”

A thoughtful quietness seeps through the nighttime breeze, which sends goosebumps up and down your skin, but you don't mind it because you know that Wonwoo is listening either way. And the more you think about it𑁋the thought of knowing that he's here, with his presence is right next to you𑁋it seems to comfort you more than you notice.

There's a small hum of acknowledgement that you hear from his end, unsure if it's just your imagination or if he's actually responding as your mind feels a little jumbled up right now. But then Wonwoo shifts beside you, his arm lightly pressing against yours.

"But I... I think I've reached a point in time where I can say I love myself a little more than a few years ago, or last year, or even just yesterday," You continue to ramble a bit aimlessly, chuckling dryly to yourself. "It’d be nice to share that with someone too, you know? To finally get over this loneliness. But it's not entirely a sad loneliness or a happy one. It's, like, uh... both put together, I guess."

A few moments of silence pass. You feel Wonwoo gently nudge your leg with his.

"I'm proud of you."

You peer up to look at him, mind nearly going blank from the way he's gazing at you. Or maybe it's just the moonlight that's making him appear so... picturesque. "What for?"

"For loving yourself, silly," Wonwoo muses almost cheekily, and the delighted tone that you catch makes your stomach leap. "Even if it's just by a small percentage than yesterday, it's still okay. You're doing good. I want you to know that."

You're doing good. It's just those three singular words that has heat forming in your eyes that you somehow manage to blink back before anything could spill, and hearing it come from Wonwoo feels different. There's a vulnerable sweetness to them, a sincerity that catches you off-guard. You force a smile𑁋a grateful one, nonetheless𑁋before it shifts into a frown.

And Wonwoo catches it right away. "What's wrong?"

Your lips form a thin line, pressing together in thought. You refuse to acknowledge why you think your heart feels slightly... jealous.

"I hope whoever you loved before knows how lucky they are one day," You say to him. "if you're still in love with them, that is..."

Wonwoo stills for a minute, pensively. "I am."

"You are?"

"I never stopped."

You stare at him for a few moments, an eyebrow lifted in disbelief at him, before crossing your arms together and letting out a small, incredulous laugh. "Then you should've said that you're in love with them, idiot."

Wonwoo sucks in a breath.

"I'm in love with you."

You blink instinctively, once, twice, three times, momentarily thinking that Wonwoo's presence might somehow disappear into thin air. But he's still there𑁋a certain softness in the way he's looking at you, a gentleness that seems to wrap around you like a warm embrace𑁋waiting for you. His words suspend heavily in the air, and maybe the world is also holding its breath just as you are too.

"And... You're not hard to love, nor are you unlovable. You're far from that," Wonwoo continues, voice tender, fond, and soft as a lullaby. "You just... need to let me in, and let me show you you're just as worthy of love as anyone else is."

You could only sit merely frozen at this point, throat tightened and jaw dropped in shock among many other weird, fuzzy feelings happening throughout your body. Something between relief and disbelief. Hope and hesitancy. Comfort and uncertainty. You have the capacity to run yet you choose not to𑁋you're letting him in, letting the warmth of his words seep into the cracks of your doubt.

Your mind reels dizzily, almost like the world has been tilting away off-balance.

"You... You're in love with me?" You repeat, almost dumbly, because you cannot seem to fathom anything that's been said in the past few moments. "All that talk about earlier... about who you..."

Wonwoo hangs his head down low, rubbing at his neck in a bashful manner. "It was about you."

"And you never... you never told me?"

"Honestly, I'd like to think a part of it was you being a tad bit oblivious." And then he just simply grins, his nose crinkling along with it. "But that's okay. Watching you slowly figure yourself out made me realise that maybe I needed to find myself a little more too."

You open your mouth to say something, but nothing comes out, and you could feel the heat of embarrassment spreading painfully throughout your face. At first, you have the urge to brush it all away as a silly misunderstanding. Maybe laugh it off, retreat back inside, and go to sleep pretending all of this didn't happen. But the sincerity in his eyes stops you.

You lick your dry lips, the cool night air beginning to feel a lot less suffocating.

"Did you?" You ask vaguely, before shaking your head repeating, "Did you... find yourself?"

Wonwoo lets his eyes roam over you, taking you in, before leaning back on the wall and bringing his gaze back up toward the night sky. Your eyes refuse to leave him, and perhaps this is what it's like to admire someone from afar and close up all at once.

The two of you take a deep, deliberate exhale together.

"Yeah," he answers, smiling softly. "I think I found myself right where I want to be."

taglist (open) ʚɞ @enhazen @haowrld @icyminghao @slytherinshua @jeonride @lockburn-castle @vrnism @weird-bookworm @mhlsymlysn @ryuwonieebae @yeonjuns-redhair @wonwooz1 @woohaeyo @mark-geolli @caramyisabitchforsvtandbts @aaniag @wootify @carlesscat-thinklogic23 @phenomenalgirl9 @roziesmei @mirxzii @bookyeom @parkjennykim @melodicrabbit @bewoyewo @honglynights @bananabubble @treehouse-mouse @tanya596carat @starshuas @totomoshi @armycarat2612 @etherealyoungk

[tomatopers]

❝ I'm. . . late?! ❞

in honor of me also forgetting vday :,) here is my first post for this acc !! I also need to remember to make an intro post n stuff, and hopefully i'll make some friends on here eventually </3 i see ppl interacting with their anons/followers and it's sooo cute when will that be me !!!!

They forgot Valentine's Day... surely the nineteenth is just as special? Diluc, Zhongli x GN!Reader (separate)

Diluc watched you silently from a window, the sunny scene outside feeling worlds away from his own dim office. You were sitting on the stone wall surrounding the Dawn Winery, pretending to read one of his boring novels while pointedly ignoring him. He was very often unaware of his stumbles, this being his first relationship, but wouldn't he would catch on soon enough?

Sure it was immature to still act huffy at this age, but Valentine's day was 5 days ago! Not one! FIVE! You had to witness Lisa flirting with the Acting Grand Master for hours, which wasn't uncommon in the slightest, but the librarian seemed to make use of all her cheesy lines on the holiday.

The stone was frigid beneath your bare legs, and you were reminded that the sun hadn't yet begun to do its job this early in the month as your legs grew numb. Perhaps on this fifth day of snubbing your lover, you'd spend the night at a bar- maybe even in Venti's company, or Kaeya's. That last ditch effort to get him to notice your huffy behavior never failed.

The worst part of this whole affair was that you couldn't even be disappointed or properly upset in peace. How could you, when this was clearly not an intentional mishap? Diluc worked diligently, and was far more dependable than most; Though, this trait of his only served to deepen your guilt. Perhaps you should apologize for this childish behavior... Maybe talk it out like proper adults...

6 o'clock found you on a barstool at Angels' share, a little early for drinking but the glass in your hand was clearly not your first. Kaeya sat to your right, an arm resting on the counter as he lent an ear to your woes. Venti stood to your left, strumming his lyre quietly and pitching in jests during the quieter moments.

The door opened at 7 on the dot, and you turned around despite knowing who stood behind you. The backlighting of the evening sun made his hair glow like fire, exaggerating the irritation on Diluc's face to resemble anger. You stood up, slightly tipsy but no less aware, and grasped Kaeya's shoulder to steady yourself before walking forward.

"Good evening, Master Diluc. What brings you here so early?" He seemed to glare at you before casting a glance at Charles. The bartender visibly jumped, quickly bowing a greeting before averting his eyes as Diluc grabbed your wrist and tugged you out of the bar. His grip, though firm, wasn't the slightest bit painful- even now, in whatever bitter mood he was in, Diluc always treated you with the utmost care.

You felt even more guilty for acting the way you did.

He released his hold on you in a more private space, tucked behind a couple trees, and waited. Just as you knew he would seek you out immediately after work, he knew you'd soon crumble under his stare and explain what you wanted. Those red eyes, sometimes blazing with anger or warm with love, were now passive and unreadable.

"Well?"

You felt heat behind your eyes, feeling the tears before they could escape down your cheeks. How stupid. It was hard to form a sentence between sniffles, so you stood and cried as he enveloped you in a hug. Maybe you had more than a few drinks back at the bar...

When your tears were all but spent, you gripped his hand in embarrassment, unable to meet his gaze. "...I'm sorry."

"What for?"

You sighed, "I've been such a child about this, it honestly wasn't even that important yet I-"

"If it bothered you, then it's important. To me."

There it was again, the ever chivalrous Diluc and his overflowing compassion when it came to you. Despite the temptation to lie and play it off, you sheepishly admitted, "It's just that, uh- a few days ago, it was Valentine's day... and we didn't really um- celebrate together... But! It's okay! You do so much already and I honestly don't need to do anything for some silly holiday when we can do stuff like that any day and.."

Looking up, you trailed off into a confused silence. Diluc's face was red, and he was the one now avoiding your eyes. "I'm- My apologies. I admit, it did slip my mind, but that is no excuse. It's more than a silly holiday, and as such, I would be honored if you would allow me an attempt to make it up to you." You burst out laughing, and he looked relieved. You really had no reason to be upset, not with this cute of a lover.

"I would allow you all the attempts possible, Mr. Ragnvindr. All the attempts and more." He smiled and took your hand, giving it a gentle squeeze as you followed him out of the alley. "Shall we visit that famous traveling chef then, darling? I heard he's in town. Or the Good Hunter, for something casual? Or perhaps we could buy you one of those gorgeous necklaces they have at the-"

You pulled him in by his collar, feeling him stiffen at the kiss before relaxing. "Diluc, sweetheart, I was thinking something closer to home? I can make dinner, and," you gestured at the setting sun, "the night is still young, I'm sure we can have some... fun, in that great big house of yours."

He turned an even brighter red, trying to cover his blush with the hand you weren't holding. "...That would be perfect."

It was rarer for Zhongli to go a day without speaking to you than it was for him to remember his wallet. That's why it was evident to even those around you that there was something amiss. You worked at a teahouse, and that just happened to be where Zhongli's favorite tea was sold. When you weren't working, you'd help out at the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor, or stroll with him along the boardwalk. Plenty of time together, to say the least.

When the regulars witnessed you not serving the consultant's tea, as you always did, it immediately became a source of chatter- Some of the older women were having quite a laugh about young lovers' quarrels, though your relationship with Zhongli was far past the "young love" stage. As you walked from table to table, it was hard to ignore his stare practically burning holes through you.

The first whole hour of his visit must've passed this way; your every movement under the scrutiny of the ex-archon, your coworkers, and half the guests in the teahouse. Your work wasn't any different than usual, no. In fact, you might even be more productive now that you weren't stopping to chat with Zhongli whenever your hands were free. The owner of the place would never admit it, but he too was curious of the predicament under his roof.

Your scheduled break was minutes away, the one you would typically spend at Zhongli's table, but you clearly didn't intend to do so today. For a being such as him, it was inevitable that certain things would slip his mind, but Valentine's Day? You had planned out the entire day as a surprise, the holiday had even fallen on one of Zhongli's leisure days, but he called in the morning to tell you he'd be assisting the Traveler and would not come by. It wasn't even a brief task! He was gone for five days!

It wasn't like you hadn't told him anything, either. "Oh illustrious Rex Lapis, God among men, I beseech your presence in my humble abode on the final day of this week." He had chuckled at your attempt of mimicking the speech of those who cowered before him in his days of glory, taking your hand with a smile and a kiss. It was going to be perfect! But the plans were discarded, and the cake you made still sat untouched in the fridge...

Xingqiu walked in with his usual cheerful wave, heading to the back corner where he'd spend a couple hours reading; As though he noticed your restlessness, he smiled and offered you a seat to join him, "I'll take you up on your offer to regale me with the stories from your trip overseas, if I may?" You smiled back, "Of course! I'll bring the tea and join you."

You spent your break with the young man, and the following remainder of the shift passed with ease. At some point, Zhongli had disappeared- had he gotten upset? Most likely not, such a small matter was far from enough to garner his irritation. It was more likely that work had called for his presence. Maybe he'd notice shop owners taking down their holiday wares on his walk and remember his oversight.

You hung up your apron, bidding the staff goodnight before descending the stairs to head home. Someone was standing at the entrance to a darker alley, one tucked away from the streetlights and the watchful eyes of the Millelith. Quickening your pace, you were about to pass by when a voice, his voice, stopped you in your tracks.

"My dear, won't you tell me what has drawn your ire?" Zhongli stepped forward, his confused expression revealing his failure to decipher the issue alone. "I am unaware of any shortcoming, but I assure you it was far from intentional-"

"..."

He walked closer, "Pardon?" You looked up at him, hoping you didn't look pathetically sad. "It was Valentine's Day, the day you left for that trip with the Traveler. That's why I had invited you over." His face fell, his immediate regret making it nigh impossible to retain your frustration. "I will not make any excuses, beloved, it was entirely my fault that we could not celebrate such a wonderful day together-"

"It was, yes."

"-and I believe I grasp the value of celebrating love with a romantic partner, so while it won't compare, please join me for dinner tomorrow, where I can properly demonstrate my affections. I recall you liking when I cook, and surely such a thing is enjoyable together."

You pretended to consider the matter, before laughing and accepting his outstretched hand. "I would love to join you, and I hope I may occupy your time through the night as well." You saw his gaze sharpen for a moment before he swept you off your feet and into his arms.

"If I didn't know any better, my love, I'd think you were trying to tempt me."

"Whatever gave you that idea, darling?"

Without setting you down, he pressed a kiss to your forehead. "I believe you wouldn't protest to spending tonight together, as well?" You could feel the laughter rumbling through his chest, could see the smile splitting his face even with your face hidden behind your hands from the embarrassment. "My most adorable lover, I shall never again miss an opportunity to exhibit the extent of my affection for you."

[rempewiththetempe]

Is This Off The Record? — Quinn Hughes⁴³

Chapter One

Series Masterlist Masterlist

Pairing: Quinn Hughes x fem!reader

Summary: Y/n gets a job as a rinkside reporter for the Vancouver Canucks, befriending many of the roster members, but one player (who just so happens to wear the C on his chest) is rather against the idea of becoming friends with the girl.

Warnings: use of y/n, cursing, I think that’s it?

w/c: 3,198

a/n: I haven’t written anything in what feels like forever, so I hope this isn’t too bad. I started writing this at like 6 in the morning without sleep the previous night and finished it up after i finally slept so I apologize for any mistakes. I’m also not very educated in the world of reporting but I tried my best. I hope you enjoy!

  You weren’t new to the world of reporting. Not in the slightest, actually. You had dreamt of being a big-time journalist since you were just a girl. You’d had it in your head for a while now that you wanted to be a sports reporter. It was kind of niche, sure, but you were going to do everything you could to achieve that goal.

  Your dad originally fueled your love for sports, and while you never played any sports competitively, you loved watching them nonetheless. There were a few sports that you didn’t enjoy watching at all. You didn’t have a “favorite” sport per se, but if someone asked you what sport you pictured yourself covering, you would say football. Of course, he made it clear that no matter what you did, he would be infinitely proud, but once your dad had learned that you wanted to work in sports reporting, he brought up how cool it would be if you could be a sideline reporter one day. Since then, that was the picture you’d had in your head for what you’d be doing in sports. Things don’t always work out the way you want them to though.

  When you’d gotten the call that you landed a job as a rinkside reporter for the Vancouver Canucks, you were beyond excited, but part of you felt a bit disappointed. It was the part of you that always wanted to be perfect at everything, the part that always demanded the best of yourself, and the part that never accepted failure or defeat. You had been dreaming about your future job for years, and it wasn’t working out exactly how you’d planned. It was fine though. Lots of people would kill to get a job like this, so it had to be fine.

  You’d lived in the Seattle area for your entire life, so you’d been hoping to land a job with the Seahawks. It didn’t work out that way, but you still landed a job with a major sports franchise within five hours of most of your immediate family. You were glad about that. Family was one of the most important things to you. Well, your family and your job.

  It didn’t take you long to pack up your things, preparing for your move to Vancouver. You’d lived in that small studio apartment for the last 4 years and it still didn’t feel like home. It still felt empty and barren. No marks on the floor from the constant dragging of kitchen table chairs. No residue of crayon low on the wall from where you and your brother had drawn on it and done a shitty job of wiping it off the wall afterward. No crack in the porcelain of the bathroom counter poorly covered by whatever the fuck kind of glue concoction your mom had tested out on it. It wasn’t home. And now it really would never be considered home.

  You’d already found a place to rent in Vancouver, a one-bedroom apartment with suspiciously low rent, and even though you’d seen it in person once, you were still slightly skeptical because of the price. Despite the stress of trying to move and find a place quickly, you were happy. Stressed, but happy. And that’s what mattered.

  You didn’t want to take a plane when you went to Vancouver, for obvious reasons, so you drove your car. Well, technically you didn’t drive your car, your brother, Brock, did. He insisted on driving up with you, even if it was only a two-and-a-half-hour drive. He had a friend who had moved up to Vancouver about a year ago who he hadn’t seen since. He came up with the idea that he’d drive you up to your new home and make sure you were settled in, and then he’d have his friend pick him up from your place so they could hang out for a few days before he took a bus or a train home or something. He didn’t really have a fully formulated plan. He often didn’t. It annoyed you to no end sometimes. It somehow always worked out okay for him though.

  “I’m just a little worried about you is all,” Brock spoke from the driver’s seat, glancing over at you momentarily before turning his eyes back to the road ahead of him. You were sat in the passenger seat of your car, absentmindedly scrolling through social media to pass the time of the could-be-worse drive. Brock’s words broke the comfortable silence that had hung in the car for the past 30 minutes. You lifted your gaze up from your phone to look at your brother who was two years your junior, yet was protective of you nonetheless.

  “I don’t know what you’re getting so worried about,” you said with a faint smile and a fond shake of your head. You turned your phone off and set it face down on your thigh as you heard him sigh at your words.

  “You’re gonna be all on you’re own, Y/n/n,” Brock let out with a nonchalant shrug of his shoulders, not taking his eyes off the road this time. His words didn’t exactly make a whole lot of sense. You moved out over four years ago and here he was talking about you living on your own.

  “I’ve been living on my own.” An exasperated chuckle escaped you before your sentence had even left your mouth. You found Brock to be a little funny sometimes, even when he wasn’t trying to be.

  “Shut up, you know what I mean, dumbass,” he said, a little laughter making its way out of his throat as he spoke. He shoved at your shoulder lightly. It was kind of hard to have a serious conversation with a boy whom you once saw eat an entire pack of Oreos within five minutes, then vomit everywhere, and proceed to try again with a pack of Nutter Butters.

  “Yeah, yeah, I know,” you said, giggling slightly at the random memory that entered your mind. The car fell silent after that, but the silence was short-lived as 10 minutes later, Brock decided to play any and every Kidz Bop song on Bluetooth to annoy the ever-living shit out of you. It worked tremendously. You flipped him off and popped your headphones in, curling up on the seat in a way that you knew would have your back hurting later. You somehow managed to fall asleep, even with Brock brake-checking you about 10 times.

  Brock had helped you settle into your new apartment, staying there for a day to help you get your stuff unpacked. There was only a box or two left to unpack by the time his friend came to pick him up. You hugged him tightly, knowing it would probably be a little while until you saw him again.

  That night, you’d wanted to go to bed early, since you had your first day on the job tomorrow, but, of course, you couldn’t stop tossing and turning until about three in the morning when your alarm was set to wake you up at 6:30. You were sure that snooze button would be pressed at least a few times the next morning, and you were right.

  You’d finally gotten out of bed at around seven in the morning. Something like that. You weren’t entirely sure. It didn’t affect your morning schedule too much though. You’d given yourself extra time so you could unpack the rest of your stuff. That part of your schedule had been replaced by you lying in bed and repeatedly pressing the snooze button. You could always unpack your stuff when you got back to the apartment, so it wasn’t a huge deal.

  The Canucks’ practice technically started at 11 AM, but most of the players arrived at ten, so that’s when you wanted to be there. That meant you had to leave your apartment around 9:30. You wanted to be punctual. No mistakes.

  You walked into your very empty bathroom and looked at yourself in the mirror. You cringed slightly at the barely noticeable dark circles under your eyes. You knew that they would go unnoticed for the most part and that concealer would probably cover it, but you were still pissy about it. You hadn’t gotten any quality sleep, after all. Well, that’s that, I suppose, you thought to yourself.

  You stripped and stepped into the shower, grabbing the mini shampoo, conditioner, and body wash bottles you always kept in your toiletries bag, since you’d forgotten to buy some yesterday. Your family always teased you about carrying those bottles with you, but they actually came in handy so who’s laughing now? Probably still them. Eh, you can’t win every battle.

  You took a long shower, washing away the drive from the day before and the shitty sleep you got last night. You closed your eyes and let the warm water hit your face, finding comfort in the feeling despite just barely being able to breathe through the stream of water.

  You eventually turned the water off reluctantly and grabbed the towel off the rack that you’d put there just yesterday. You shivered as you opened the curtain and the cold air hit your wet skin. Warm showers were great until you had to get out.

  You went through the rest of your routine, brushing your teeth, blowdrying your hair, finding an outfit to wear, etc. The morning felt like it passed by in slow motion. The suspense was killing you. You were restless as you waited for the clock to tell you it was time to leave. When it did, you practically bolted out the door.

  The drive to the practice arena was anxious, to say the least. The excitement had turned into nervousness as soon as you put your key in the ignition. No music played through your speakers. The Bluetooth never connected to your phone, but even if it did, you wouldn’t have turned anything on anyway. Silence was what you needed to collect your thoughts and prepare yourself.

  You got to the rink early, but you were glad you’d gotten there early. Better than being late. You sat in your car for a few minutes, before finally taking a deep breath and getting out. You must have made sure you locked your car at least ten times as you walked up to the arena, which was most definitely unnecessary.

  Once inside, it was surreal looking at the environment. It was their practice arena, nothing incredibly special about it, but it was what the whole thing meant. It meant that you were doing what you loved, what you’d wanted to do for so long. You absolutely couldn’t wait.

  It didn’t take long for all the players to arrive. Most of them arrived around the same time, pretty much all within a span of about five minutes. You had a few words with some of them, mainly just quick questions that didn’t really get you anywhere, but, hey, progress is progress. You actually had a relatively long chat with J.T. Miller, you know, considering the circumstances. The conversation didn’t last nearly as long as you would’ve liked but he spent longer talking to you than the others did.

  The last one to arrive was none other than the newly-named Captain of the Canucks himself, a whole ten minutes after everyone else did. He wasn’t technically late, but still. It didn’t seem very Captain-like, but you guessed that you weren’t quite in the position to judge, seeing as you didn’t even play sports, let alone captain an NHL team.

  “Hi, if you wouldn’t mind, I’d like to ask-” You began cheerfully but cut yourself off due to the fact he didn’t even acknowledge your presence. He just…walked right by. You couldn’t tell if he actually didn’t hear or see you, or if he was just really fucking shameless about ignoring people. You could hardly believe either one, but at least the former option would be a misunderstanding. The latter was just plain fucking rude.

  You stood baffled for a moment but recovered as you saw him disappear into the locker room. You blinked a few times to clear your head of the weird interaction, before going over to take your seat next to the rest of the reporters and journalists.

  The practice went smoothly from what you could tell. It didn’t seem like a whole lot was going on, just routine drills. You made sure to take lots of pictures anyway, essentially documenting the entire practice, sometimes focusing your camera lens on the fan favorites. You were certainly better with your words than with a camera, but they say a picture is worth a thousand words, so you tried. Your photography skills weren’t as good as you would’ve liked them to be, but you were getting better.

  As their practice came to a close, most of the reporters and journalists gathered outside the door to the locker room, waiting for the okay to enter and ask their questions. Of course, they wanted their questions answered. It was the first official practice of the regular season, after all. You tried to wriggle your way to the front but to no avail. It seemed kind of counterproductive. Once the limited amount of media reps had begun filtering in, you certainly felt like a small fish in a big pond. Forget the pond, you were in the fucking Pacific Ocean. Everyone else seemed to know exactly what they were doing, exactly who to go to, and which questions to ask them, and you didn’t. You were sure you looked like a lost puppy in here.

  Someone seemed to notice that too. The fellow you’d had a friendly chat with earlier. The 30-year-old center was already answering some questions from another reporter, but as he answered a question you hadn’t quite heard, he jerked his head to the side, inviting you over. You gladly went. You probably wouldn’t have been able to work up the courage to talk with anyone in here alone. You made your way over to where he stood, a microphone held in front of his face by the middle-aged male journalist who stood directly in front of him. You stood slightly off to the side, waiting for the other reporter to finish up with his questions.

  Once he finished his questions, you made room for yourself in front of the man who had thankfully granted you his kindness. He chuckled as you awkwardly stood in front of him. His presence was somewhat comforting.

   “Don’t sweat it, Kid,” He said, flashing you a comforting smile. The way he spoke the words reminded you of the cool teachers in school after you’d fucked up so badly that you’d just barely gotten by with a passing grade.

  You laughed a little self-consciously at his comment, now knowing that your shortcomings were also apparent to others and not just you. You took a deep breath before speaking, attempting to calm your nerves.

  “Would you wanna answer a few questions?” You managed to ask and it felt like a big step for you even though it was just a seven-word sentence. He nodded wordlessly, a reassuring smile on his face as he did so.

  You actually shook off some nerves and asked him a few run-of-the-mill questions. Simple ones like, What aspect of play do you think your team has improved the most in over the off-season? What aspects of play have you improved in individually over the off-season?, and Do you think your team possesses the necessary chemistry between teammates to be a Stanley Cup contender this year? All of the questions either came with easy answers or came with no direct answer at all. You didn’t mind all that much though. Not right now anyway. You were asking the right questions, and knowing that made things just a little bit easier.

  After you had finished your short interview with J.T., he led you over to where his Captain stood, stating that you just had to ask him some of your questions. You weren’t entirely keen on the idea after your, for lack of a better word, odd interaction with him before practice had even started, but you begrudgingly obliged.

  “Are you sure he’s up for more questions?” You asked almost nervously as a sort of last-ditch effort to get out of talking to this guy. You knew it was a stupid question that wouldn’t get you anywhere. These people knew how to talk to the media and they knew that it was part of their job to do such, of course,, he’d answer some questions. No harm in at least trying to get out of it though, right?

  J.T. just laughed at your question and the insistence in your tone at first. He either didn’t know or didn’t care that you didn’t want to talk to Quinn and you didn’t know which one made you more annoyed.

  “He won’t mind,” He finally said said after a breath. You didn’t care if he minded, quite frankly, you did not want to go through another awkward interaction. You’d already gotten the answers that you’d needed anyway. You were screaming internally.

  Quinn was finishing up some questions with some other journalist when you made it over to where he stood. He had an intense gaze as you could tell he carefully thought about each one of his answers. He glanced over at you as the woman in front of him asked what you simultaneously hoped would be her last question and her first question, wanting this to be over with as quickly as possible but not even want it to start in the first place. His eyes weren’t on you long and you weren’t exactly sure what to make of the way he looked at you for that short time. 

  The question the woman had been asking had actually been her last question and you let out a breath when you realized such. With a smile on his face, J.T. nudged Quinn and it looked like he was about to say something, but he was cut off by the woman who had just been interviewing Quinn.

  “Could I ask you a few questions as well?” She asked J.T. with a rather confident smile on her face and you didn’t know how one could even be that confident in a situation like this.

  “Um, sure,” He said after a moment and you could see that he didn’t exactly want to, but he knew he kind of had to.

  You silently begged him not to leave you alone, but it was part of his job and you knew that. You still let out a long sigh as he was led a little further away from you and Quinn as to not interfere with your interview.

  You turned back to Quinn after a moment and he was also watching J.T. being virtually dragged away. It seemed that he saw you look back at him through his peripherals, and he turned to face you.

  “Can you answer some questions for me?”

[lvis44]

Sweet Escape Pt. 6 // LH 44

Lewis Hamilton x Y/N

Warnings: Swearing, 18+ (mentions of sexual activities), Anxiety, Jealousy, Angst, Mentions of Alcohol, Regret, Emotional Turmoil, Not Edited

Word Count: 4.3k

Summary: Paradise is supposed to be fun and relaxing... a Sweet Escape, but when unspoken feelings and jealousy rise to the surface, everything can be turned upside down in the blink of an eye.

Note: I felt bad leaving you all in pain, not that this will be much better but hey, we're getting there! This part is a tad shorter but I felt that this whole thing should be stand alone. The next part will be the final part of the story, but don't worry there will be an epilogue. I'm glad you have all been enjoying so far and I greatly appreciate everyone's support!

I am not a professional writer and all of this is a work of fiction and is strictly for fun. Enjoy! xxx

Previous Sections: Prologue - Part One - Part Two - Part Three - Part Four - Part Five

It was nearing three in the morning when you heard your door open. The second you had arrived home you had grabbed your stuff out of Charlotte's room and moved back into your old one. You weren’t particularly in the mood to face anyone. You had spent the last few hours quietly sobbing into your knees, balled up on the bed like a child. You had seemingly run out of tears but the sorrow didn’t change. You hadn’t even heard everyone come home, somehow beating them even on foot, you assumed it was because they had to go find everyone else.

“What?” You snapped at whomever had entered your room, not even looking toward the door.

“Hey, I just wanted to make sure you were okay.” You heard Miles’ voice from the doorway, his voice barely above a whisper.

“Do I seem fucking okay?” You snapped again, your filter long gone.

He let out a sigh, closing the door behind him softly as he dared to make his way over to your bed, sitting down beside you gently.

“I’m sorry Y/N, it wasn’t fair to you to cause a scene like that.” He says softly, glancing over at you to see you staring into space, your attention fixated on the blank wall to the side of the room.

You scoff, not trying to be rude but unable to control anything that comes out of you, “Well at least one of you knows how to fucking apologize. I’m still mad at you though.”

You hear him sigh again, moving closer to you so he can place a hand on your back, rubbing softly. You don’t even have the energy to flinch away from him, just letting him rest his hand there and enjoying the slightest bit of comfort.

“I know you’re pissed at Lewis, you have every right to be. Don’t kill her but Charlotte kind of filled me in when we got home. He massively fucked up.” His hand continues it’s light circling pattern, “And truth be told so did I. I don’t know why but I constantly feel like I need to protect you and hearing that asshole call you anything other than perfect made me want to kill him, he’s honestly lucky Lewis had half a brain to pull me away from him. I know you can take care of yourself but I’m always gonna look out for you, no matter what. Hence the reason I tried to deck my best friend earlier tonight.”

“I’m sorry, you what?” You whip your head towards him, that last bit of information really catching your interest.

“Yeah, when Charlotte filled me in I was still livid with the whole situation from the bar and finding out what sparked it really pissed me off. It only felt right he get at least a swift kick to the groin. Not to disappoint you but Char stopped me. I’m shocked you didn’t hear us.” He almost sounds like he wants to laugh as he tells you, like he can’t believe the whole situation himself.

“He needs a kick to the groin, taking that thing out of commission for a little while might do everyone some good.” You joke dryly, making Miles laugh next to you.

“If you need me to do it, I’m more than willing.” He offers, only kind of a joke, you feel like if you genuinely asked him to do it, he would, given the circumstances.

“I hate that I can hate him and love him all at the same time. I don’t want to lose him, but this can’t carry on this way.” You confess to Miles.

“I know Charlotte already said this to the both of you, but you guys really need to fucking talk.” He tells you seriously, before adding, “And sober.”

“I know, I know.” You groan, “I’m sorry we’ve managed to fuck up so much of vacation.”

“It’s been much more him than you sweetheart, he brought every ounce of drama himself. I could tell something was up with you over the last few days but I couldn’t really figure out what. I’m sorry it’s him.” Miles brings you in for a side hug, his arm wrapping protectively around you.

“I’m just so fucking sick of it all. I’m so tired.” You tell him, leaning against his shoulder.

“I know, understandably so.” Miles lets out a sigh, holding you in silence for a few moments. “You get some sleep and I’ll check on you in the morning, okay?” He says as he presses a kiss to your temple.

All you do is nod, knowing he’s right.

“I know you’re not all good or anything, but I’m glad you're still here. I was worried you were gonna be at the airport by the time we got home, we freaked for a second when we saw your stuff wasn’t in Charlottes anymore.” He tells you quietly, still not having let you go.

“I just didn’t want to have to face anyone, figured moving back to my old room would be the easiest way.” You just about whisper, feeling your exhaustion catch up to you.

“Well, I’m sorry to have intruded, but I needed to check on you,” Miles says, kissing your forehead one more time before easing you back toward your pillows, “get some sleep hun.”

. . .

You had no idea what time it was when you finally woke up and you have no idea how long you’ve been laying in your bed staring at the ceiling. It has to have been a good hour at this point. You can hear people moving around somewhere in the house, the last thing you want to do is go and interact. You were embarrassed, angry, hurt, and so much more you couldn’t even wrap your head around. You’ve had enough. As you’ve been laying there, more than once you’ve contemplated if you could manage to pack your stuff and sneak out of the house, fly back home without another word. You knew you couldn't and more than likely someone would come track you down the second they knew you were gone, well normally they would. You don’t know what your friends know of the situation. How much did everyone else see, how much had they been told? You knew you should get up and eat something but you had no appetite, anxiety and dread having taken over your body. You lay there going through your thoughts for more than an hour. You want to sit down and talk with Lewis, you need to, but the anxiety of the possible outcome is paralyzing you. What if he confirms your fears, admits that all he’s ever been trying to do is get it your pants? What if now that you’ve shut him down he doesn’t see a reason to keep you around anymore? The rational part of your brain knows that you're overthinking, that your friendship with Lewis still stands on semi solid ground. Maybe there will be some change to how he is around you or how often he’s with you but at the base of it all your still close friends. Lewis knows things about you that your own family doesn’t, he’s been able to read you better than you can read yourself on more than a few occasions, all of that can’t go up in smoke this quickly. Can it?

There’s a soft knock on your door, making you groan. You don’t respond hoping they’ll go away. They don’t, only knocking again and gently pushing the door open. You roll your head to the side, seeing Miles peeking his head into your room, a comforting smile on his face. True to his word, here he was to check on you.

“Good morning,” He says softly, making his way into your room once he sees you’re awake, “I brought you something to eat, you need to get something in you.”

You give him a small smile as he places a tray of fruit and a large glass of ice water on the table next to your bed.

“Thanks.” You croak out, your voice hoarse from crying all night.

“Everybodies in their rooms for the most part if you need to venture out of hiding at any point.” He tells you, knowing you’ve been avoiding everyone, but one person in particular.

You just nod, taking a small sip of the cold water. It feels amazing on your burning throat, as if it’s your first drink of water after a month in the desert.

“What time is it?” You ask, trying to get some bearing on where you are in your life, even if it's just the time of day.

He glances down at the watch on his wrist, “Just before noon.”

It’s still earlier than you thought it was at this point and it fills you with a small sense of dread, there’s so much more of the day to go about trying to avoid everyone.

“You know no ones mad at you, right?” Miles makes sure you know that there’s no hostility facing you in the house.

You just shrug, unsure of how true that actually is and also not quite wanting to admit that it’s more so that you’re embarrassed to even see your friends. There’s another soft knock on the door and you're praying it’s Charlotte, the only other person you could bare being around right now. Much to your dismay, a very tired looking Lewis pokes his head around the door that Miles had left ajar. Your breath hitches, anxiety filling your body.

“Oh, shit, sorry, I’ll um-” Lewis stutters, not wanting to interrupt your chat with Miles.

“All good man, I was just gonna head out anyway.” Miles says, standing from where he had sat on your bed.

You know Miles can sense your anxiety but he gives you a look that says “just get it over with” and heads towards the door. Before he exits he turns back toward you and says “Holler for me if you need anything, alright?”

He whispers something to Lewis as he walks out and you can see a pained expression on Lewis’ face at whatever he said. Once he’s gone, Lewis stands awkwardly in the doorway, not quite being able to look at you as he plays with his hands down in front of him.

“You can come in.” You squeak, not actually fully wanting to say it but knowing it needs to be done. 

He finally looks at you, putting his hand on the door as if to close it but you can see the question in his eyes. You nod, not wanting your whole conversation to be heard by everyone in the house. He very gently pushes the door closed, making his way further into your room. He looks around, evidently unsure of what to do with himself. He opts for perching on the edge of your dresser just across from where you sit on the bed, you’re facing each other and you can feel your stomach filling with butterflies, but not the good kind you usually get when you’re around him.

“I owe you an apology, well, multiple apologies.” He finally says, looking down at the ground, ashamed. His voice is hoarse as if he’s just woken up.

You don’t say anything, unsure of what you would even say.

“I’m sorry for the way that I’ve treated you. I’m sorry for not talking to you sooner. I’m sorry that my company embarrassed you in front of everyone. I’m sorry for my behavior last night, all of it. I’ve treated you in a way that if anyone else did the same to you, I would hate them.” He finally apologizes for the last few days, finally looking at you as he does so.

He looks exhausted, much older than usual with bags under his eyes and more scruff than you're used to him allowing.

“Thank you,” you whisper, “and I’m sorry I avoided talking to you too.”

He shakes his head, “It shouldn’t have been on you to fix, I’m the one that fucked up.”

You offer a small smile in his direction. All is not immediately forgiven and this conversation needs to continue, but hearing him acknowledge the reasons he needed to apologize in the first place does your heart some good at the very least.

“Why did you do it?” You ask quietly, your voice timid, not sure you truly want the answer.

He looks surprised by the question, also not quite sure how to respond. He lets out a sigh as he collects his thoughts.

“I know it doesn’t make it right,” He starts, pausing for a moment to make sure his words come across as clearly as possible, “but, it’s been on my mind for a long time. I’m well aware that I went about it all wrong, especially last night, I was incredibly out of line last night, but I’ve thought about it alot.” He cringes at his admission.

You furrow your brow, worried this is going exactly the direction you feared, hoping he will continue.

“I don’t mean for that to sound creepy, but I’ve been really attracted to you for quite a while. I should have made that clear in a much different way. I never want you to feel like I’m trying to take advantage of you in any way, it makes me sick to think that I have ever made you feel like that.” He says, a look of regret on his tired face.

“What I said last night was harsh, my drunk brain just felt like it was the best way to get my point across.” You admit to him.

“But it wasn’t really that harsh, despite it not being intentional, it’s kind of true. What I said on the other hand, that was harsh, I never should have called you a tease or said you indulged in it, it wasn’t fair.” His words are firm, for the first time he’s holding steady eye contact with you, demanding your attention so you feel the remorse in his words.

“I need to be honest, it really hurts that you’re able to treat me like all the other girls you fuck around with, I thought I was more important to you than them.” You quietly admit to him.

“Fuck, you are. So much more important to me.” He says, finally moving from where he’s been leaning on your dresser and cautiously making his way toward where you sit on your bed. He carefully sits next to you, leaving a good distance but making sure he’s near you.

“Then how can you be so okay with chatting up the bar tender, grinding on some random woman, and then still come over and try to fuck me, yet again. All because your ego couldn’t handle me dancing with someone else, when you were doing exactly the same.” You push, needing him to truly understand just how shitty his actions made you feel.

“You’re right, I was jealous. In my ideal world you would have been dancing with me all night, but I knew you wouldn’t have allowed that where we were in our relationship. And then you found that prick and the way you were with him, it just set something off in me. I wasn’t thinking. I know that sounds like a horrible excuse but there was part of me that was hoping I could make you just as jealous as I was, not that you would be when you’ve made it clear you’re not interested, and I should have respected that. Between the alcohol and my ego, I let myself treat you like shit and there’s no excuse for that, I would take it back in a heartbeat if I could.” His face is sincere, you can tell just how much he regrets last night but it doesn’t automatically let him off the hook. He continues “And as for the bartender, I wasn’t chatting her up, she’s an old friend. I’ve never slept with her and never will, she’s like family. I got distracted talking with her and by the time I found you again you had that Jason dude on your hip.”

You want to laugh, not only at him forgetting Jadens name, but also at him saying you’re not interested. He has every right to assume you’re not, you’ve done nothing but turn him down. You almost want to tell him just how wrong he is, how the only reason you said no is because you don’t want to lose him, but right now is not the time for that, you don’t want to open any windows and derail the conversation that so far is going shockingly well, even if it hurts.

“Is she the woman you went to after your fight with Talia?” You push him slightly, hoping to get more out of him while he’s being so honest with you.

His face screws up for a second, confused how you would know that. You see the questioning look on his face and rush to clarify, to confess.

“I know you lied to me that night, or at least I kind of hope you did. I overheard you and Charlotte talking the next morning, something about a woman named Marina.” You explain.

He lets out a deep sigh, “Yeah, I’m sorry I lied to you. I wasn’t particularly in the mood to explain the whole situation. But to answer your question, yes, that is the woman that I went and saw.” He doesn’t offer any further explanation, you want to push him but you allow him to leave it at that, at least for now.

You both sit in silence for a moment, trying to figure out where to go from here.

“Lewis,” You say quietly, getting his attention, “I don’t want to lose you.”

His face morphs into absolute sorrow and pain, for a moment you worry that he’s mourning your friendship, not knowing how to break the news to you.

“Y/N, you’ll never lose me. I would go crazy without you.” His voice is soft but sincere as he carefully scoots closer to you on the bed, testing the waters slightly. You let him get close enough that your knees are touching, his hand coming to rest over yours, squeezing tightly.

“How do you think I could ever let you go?” He asks with a deep frown.

“Because you seemed to be okay with ruining our friendship just to get me in your bed.” You accuse him, your voice wavering.

“Sweetheart, I was never trying to ruin our friendship, I-” He takes a long pause, gathering himself with a deep breath, “I don’t know how to explain it exactly, but truth be told, me trying to get you into bed was never just me trying to sleep with you. It’s been a long time since I felt for someone how I feel for you and I’m not good at making that clear. I don’t even truly understand everything that I feel for you but, I know it’s a whole lot more and a whole lot different than how I feel about all of my other friends. I guess somewhere in my head I felt like I could get that across physically, that maybe it would make everything make sense once I had you. I know it sounds ridiculous but I don’t know how to do this.”

His confession both shocks and confuses you, your mind flitting back to the night he disappeared after his fight with Talia. That night he had told you that he had feelings for her, now he was trying to convince you of his feelings for you.

“What about Talia?” You ask, voice still unsure.

“What about Talia?” He throws back at you, confused as to why she matters right now.

“The night that we talked, after your fight, you told me you were worried that you had messed everything up with someone that you cared about or liked a lot, I don’t remember exactly what you said but…” You trail off, a slow moment of realization coming over you.

He chuckles softly, shaking his head as he looks down at the ground before returning his eyes to yours, “Y/N, I was talking about you. In no universe was I ever even considering Talia.” His words confirm what you’ve just realized and you want to slap yourself, you feel like an idiot.

“I- oh my god.” You breathe out, shutting your eyes. His eye contact suddenly feeling like too much.

You stand from the bed, disconnecting your hand from his. He stays seated, looking up at you as you begin to pace, letting you process what he’s said.

“How long?” You ask suddenly, stopping and looking at him.

“In all honesty, I don’t really know. I only really realized it sometime last year. I was thinking it would go away, that it was just some silly crush, but it just kept getting worse.” He explains, shrugging his shoulders as if it’s totally normal.

“So all the time that you were sleeping with all these other women and still flirting with me was, what?” You feel yourself getting agitated, not quite sure how to feel about his actions.

“I kind of figured that if I kept sleeping around that I would be satisfied and I wouldn’t feel the same way, but I couldn't help but keep flirting with you, it’s just naturally how I am with you, it feels right.” Once again he shrugs as if it’s no big deal.

“Do you not want to feel this way about me?” You ask quietly, a slight sting of rejection settling over you.

“No, no, that’s not it at all.” He rushes out, standing to approach you, carefully he puts his hands on your arms, making you look at him, “It’s not at all that I don’t want to feel this way about you, I’m glad I do to be completely honest. It’s just that I’ve been single for a very long time and I truly do not want to fuck this up, I’m scared that I’m going to and I’m going to lose you. It felt like everything would be so much easier if I could just keep being your friend and keep you in my life. But that didn’t happen, I still managed to fuck it up.”

You can feel tears forming in your eyes, he notices them too, a look of regret on his face.

“So what do you want?” You ask him, needing more clarity.

“All in all, I want you, I want to do this with you and god I want to not fuck it up. I want you to be mine, all mine, all in.” He says confidently, much more sure of himself than you feel.

You stare at him as the tears start to roll down your cheeks, your emotions are at an all time high. Part of you is filled with pure ecstasy, the man that you have crushed on for years is standing here in front of you confessing his feelings, asking you to be his. The other part of you is filled with absolute fear, the thought of trying and failing with him, losing one of the most amazing men you have ever met, your best friend. You know that a life with Lewis could either end in the most beautiful love you have ever experienced or the worst, most gut wrenching heartache known to man.

“Can I hug you? You look like you could use it.” His voice is soft, his heart aching as he watches you cry.

All you can do is nod as you let yourself fall into his hard chest. He holds you against him tightly, rubbing soft circles on your back as he once again lets you cry into his chest. You’ve done this too many times in the last twenty four hours. He stays silent, just letting you work through your emotions. When you finally calm down you pull your head from his chest but he keeps you tight against him, one of his hands coming up to wipe some remaining tears from your cheek. You revel in the feeling of his touch, how comforting a simple action can be. As you stare into his eyes you can see how much emotion and affection is hidden behind them. A soft, sad smile across his lips.

“What’s going through that beautiful mind?” He asks, his voice just above a whisper.

“I don’t know.” You tell him honestly.

He just nods, understanding how overwhelmed you must be.

“I need time, I need to think.” You say, averting your eyes from his, knowing you’ll say yes if you look into them for a moment too long.

“Take all the time you need, I’ll always be right here if you decide you’ll have me.” He says softly, pressing a kiss to the top of your head as he gives you another proper hug.

He finally steps away from you, leaving you feeling displaced in your own room, before he turns to leave he grabs your hand, squeezing it tightly, “And Y/N, no matter what you decide, you will never lose me. I will always be right here.” With that he leaves the room, leaving you behind with a whirlwind of thoughts.

As much as every part of you wants to believe him in saying he’ll never leave you, you can’t help but wonder if it’s fully true. If you try this and all of it comes crashing down, you can’t imagine being able to be around him.

Is the possibility of loving and being loved by the most incredible human being worth the possibility of losing him entirely? 

[avocadoguru]

He was staring at her in a way no one had in her entire life. She couldn’t read anything in his eyes - not surprise, not fear, not malicious intent - nothing. (wolfrry, werewolf!harry, alpha!harry, ranger!y/n)

Lupus Noctis- Masterlist, Author’s Note & Warnings

Chapter 5 / alternatively, read on wattpad

Chapter 6 (word count: 20k)

Y/N was going feral, she was quite sure of it. She even checked to see if she had a fever. Two whole days had gone by since the lake and the kiss and she hadn’t heard a word from Harry since. She wasn’t sure what to make of it. He was probably trying to figure shit out just the way she was because Y/N wasn’t second-guessing their mutual attraction. Not in the slightest.

What had happened between them was real, still palpable in her mind’s eye. She could almost still feel his lips on hers, his tongue sliding against hers in perfect sync, she could still feel his warm hands on her body, his strong arms holding her eye level to him, his hardened cock pressed against the underside of her thigh. Could still hear the low growls that came from him, like he was some kind of animal ready to take what he wanted. All she had to do was close her eyes and there it was again. 

She loved how he handled her and looked at her and spoke to her.

And you’d let me, wouldn’t you? 

She’d been thinking about it nonstop, or in any case- an inappropriate amount. She couldn’t stop imagining scenarios with Harry. Taking it further than they did that day at the lake. How he could so easily just lift her up and manhandle her if he wanted. Maybe he’d place her on the ground and use his big mouth to lick all over her body and down between her legs. She felt like he’d be a man who’d enjoy eating a woman out. Using his tongue.

She couldn’t even focus on work, couldn’t pay attention to anything, because every time she had a spare second her mind wandered off to that evening. 

While she was at work, she was constantly holding her breath for when he’d inevitably show up. And when she was at home she half expected him to knock on her door again.

But he never did.

Y/N wasn’t all that worried about that aspect, though. She could feel it in her bones that she’d be seeing more of him very soon. Not that there was anything left to see. God, just picturing the way his cock wouldn’t even fit into those skinny jeans of his was making her clench around nothing. And well, it wasn’t exactly nothing- but her vibrator was no match for what Harry had been endowed with. Nevertheless, she’d abused it ever since he’d dropped her off at her apartment, all riled up and needy. Harry had even asked her if it’d be ok if he watched her get inside the building from his car- he didn’t trust himself to walk her to the door. And she wanted to ask him why he was resisting it- because in the moment, lord knows she didn’t want him to hold back. 

But looking back, she was glad for it. She didn’t want Harry to be just a hookup. Had they had sex that night, that’s what it would’ve felt like. And she felt like they deserved more than that. And judging by his actions, Harry did too. 

Y/N had nothing against casual sex. With how her past relationships had gone, she even preferred that to the seemingly inevitable heartache and disappointment. But she’d never felt that kind of connection with anyone else before, the way she did with Harry. It went beyond just the physical, at least for her it did. 

Unless there really was some other reason for which Harry was holding back. He’d ran off that first night when they were just about to kiss, and this time he’d taken her back home before things could escalate at the lake- and maybe it was just because she was cold (and for some weird reason he was absolutely fine with the drop in temperature), but then he’d have found a way to get her to invite him inside. But he wouldn’t even walk her to the door- not even with her bad ankle- which really told her that he was serious about not trusting himself anywhere near her apartment.

She hoped his reason was the same as hers- she wanted more than sex, and they should probably try and get to know each other a bit better before they jumped into bed. But what if it wasn’t, and something else was holding him back? It would explain his absence for the past two days… But then again, Y/N couldn’t exactly explain it, she just knew. She knew this wasn’t the end of her and the mystery man.

She was growing a bit frustrated though. There was only so much her flimsy vibrator could do. Y/N… ached for him. She was desperate to feel full of him. She knew he’d stretch her out better than any other man she’d ever been with, because… well, it was quite obvious why. Part of her was a bit worried she couldn’t take him. She was more than willing to try, though. She was even more than willing to go down on him and try to fit him all in her mouth. A little challenge of sorts. Only there wasn’t anything little about it.

Y/N threw the covers off of her sweaty body with a huff. If only he could hear her, his ego would inflate more than it already was. If only he knew how needy she was for him already, and he’d barely even done anything. Yet here she was, alone in her bed, trying and failing to fall asleep for the better part of an hour and although she’d made herself come once for the evening, she found herself reaching for her toy again. 

She just seemingly couldn’t scratch the ache he left. Just imagining the way he’d placed his large hand around her throat made her thrust the toy inside of her deeper and faster, she wasn’t trying to drag it out. She was tired. And all she wanted was to be absolutely railed by him. Was that too much to ask? She whimpered, bringing her other hand to her clit and adding pressure from the outside as well. She was ready to fall over the edge when a piercing sound made her jump, groaning in frustration when she realized it was her phone.

She turned the vibrator off and fumbled with the phone, almost dropping it when she saw the caller ID. Her heart was already beating fast due to her impending orgasm but now it threatened to break out of her ribcage. A glance over to the upper right corner of the screen read 1:03 am and then she answered when she realized she was taking too long “...Yes?”

“You’re awake.”

Y/N exhaled, trying to steady her heartbeat and breathing “Well, yeah. You can’t pick up calls in your sleep last time I checked.”

“You weren’t asleep though, were you?”

Y/N paused, “No, I wasn’t.”

“Had I not known about your ankle I would even assume you were… running. You’re quite out of breath.”

Y/N didn’t miss the hint of amusement in his voice. Oh, he was onto her. “I hurried to get to my phone, I’d left it in the other room. I thought it must’ve been some kind of emergency. Why are you calling at 1am, Harry?” It was her turn to tease him. 

“Liar. Probably for the same reason why you weren’t asleep.”

“And what reason might that be?”

“...I can’t stop thinking about it either.” 

Damn. Ok, touché. She couldn't even try and pretend otherwise. 

When she didn’t, having taken her aback, Harry continued, “And I know just why you’re so out of breath. I’ve heard your laboured breathing when you’re aroused and that’s exactly what it sounds like. If I close my eyes I can see your mouth parted just right, your eyes hooded and glazed over– I can see it all. It’s mine forever, the memory of you fucked out of your mind like that for me… What have you done to me?”

Y/N was at a loss for words. All she could muster was a pathetic whimper and in response, she heard his shuddered breath over the phone and without even contemplating it, she grabbed her vibrator and without turning it back on, she began sliding it in and out of her drenched pussy again. 

“I can hear that, Y/N. Can hear how wet you are for me from over here… Fuck.”

She gasped but increased her movements, she had already been close, but now that she could hear him, and hearing what he had to say to her- it was all too much. 

“Harry…” she whispered, just as she was about to come and then she heard him growl, almost as if he was in physical pain- that’s what sent her over the edge. She cried out into the phone as she spasmed and thrashed on her bed and she realized he was right there with her only after she’d regained her consciousness somewhat and could hear his pants of exertion.

Hearing his name on her lips as she was coming must’ve been the most beautiful sound Harry could think of. He knew he’d be repeating it in his mind over and over again, now. He was surprised he could even orgasm anymore after all the self-abuse he’d been indulging in because of her, but somehow she’d managed to coax the strongest one yet out of him, and he just didn’t know what to do with himself. He’d called in an effort to calm himself down- he was missing her so much that he felt he was going out of his mind. He needed something, anything- and now that the scent from her panties had completely worn off he was like a junkie desperate for his fix. He’d tried to keep his distance and gain some clarity over the situation- knowing the implications of what he was getting himself in with her he couldn’t just throw himself headfirst into this in good conscience, no matter how much he wanted to. After that kiss, he knew his fate was sealed, but she- she had no idea. She had no way of knowing, and he needed to be strong for the both of them and assess this from every angle.

But every angle was just blurred by the intensity of his feelings for her. He just couldn’t think straight. He knew it was imprudent, and he knew he was risking it all, and he knew it was unfair to her- but damnit he couldn’t resist this. It was bigger than him. He was powerless to stop this now that it’d begun. And it all culminated with him grabbing the phone and calling her in the middle of the night, just to find her rutting in her bed like a needy kitten for him. And just like that- his mind had been made up.

What felt like minutes must’ve gone by where they just listened to each other breathing, trying to come down from their respective highs and finally he broke the silence, “I need to see you.”

“What– now?!”

Harry huffed in amusement, “Don’t put ideas inside my head. I was gonna show up at your doorstep and decided to call instead, and now I’m regretting it knowing what you were up to. Soon. Tomorrow. After work. Come with me?”

“Okay… where?”

“Out.”

“Out? Like… on a date?”

Harry smiled to himself at the prospect. He’d never done that, but if his little human wanted a date that’s what he’d give her. He’d play it by the book, even if it wasn’t the way his kind went about things, he was determined to leave all that aside for her sake.

He was willing to leave everything behind. And the thought sent chills down Harry’s spine because he knew he was done for. 

His kind were loyal creatures. They believed in mating for life, that’s how they went about it, it was how they were built, it was encoded in the animalistic side of their DNA. Sure, Harry had had his fun, but never with any alpha females, and it was agreed on both parts it would be just sex, knowing full well nothing more could come of it. There was no bond, no connection, no hint of anything more there.

But with Y/N, he’d felt something so overwhelmingly different since the first time he’d laid his eyes on her. He recognized what this was, although it didn’t make sense- after all, she was human. She couldn’t be his mate. 

But every bone in his body screamed otherwise. She was his. Their connection was undeniable. Even apart they were losing their minds over each other. What had happened just moments prior over the phone was testament to that. They were so in tune it was impossible that she wasn’t made for him, and him alone. And his instincts told him to do everything to pursue this because it was meant to be.

“It’s a date.”

*

“Is this a bad time?”

“Depends on why you’re calling.”

“Had I wanted to snap your neck for the way you gave my number away I would’ve by now, don’t you think?”

Niall sighed dramatically “Thank you, oh merciful alpha, for sparing me. You’re welcome by the way.”

‘“Welcome?!”

“Yeah, I probably aided your trajectory right into her–”

“Okay. Let’s set one thing straight. You’re to stop talking about her like that.”

“Like what?”

“Like she’s… a piece of meat.”

“I mean, I don’t see her that way at all but I’m betting it’s kinda how you’re seeing her judging by how you were sizing her up the whole time the two of you were in my office, It’s almost cartoonish the way your pupils dilate around her.”

“Well, it’s not. Not at all.”

“Oh,... I see. Are you sure about this?”

“Hundred percent.”

“I mean, not to say I don’t think you thought this through, but…”

Harry cleared his throat, “Then don’t. Besides, I didn’t call to discuss this with you, it’s not up for debate. However… since you have a lot more experience with humans… romantically,...”

“Ain’t nothing romantic about it, I’m afraid.” Niall laughed.

“–Regardless. I was wondering if you could maybe spare some… tips.”

“Tips?’”

“Yeah. Advice.”

Niall furrowed his brows in amused confusion, “What exactly are you asking me, Harry Edward?”

“Well, for instance, how does this whole… dating business go about?”

Niall bit his lower lip, suppressing his amusement over this whole thing while spinning in his directorial chair at his desk in his office. Luckily for Harry, he was on his lunch break, but he was more than willing to skip eating altogether just to hear his friend ask him these uncomfortable questions. He loved to hear him struggle. “Oh. What do you wanna know?”

“Well, anything. Everything, I guess. You know well enough how differently we go about these things. I genuinely don’t have a clue what she’s expecting of me tonight and I don’t wanna give her the impression that I’ve never done this before.”

“I see.” Niall was pinching the bridge of his nose trying to keep it together. He felt for his friend, he really did, but it wasn’t every day that he got to hear him like this. Harry was so… well, alpha, that he’d never heard him sound unsure about anything in his entire life before. He was enjoying this, quite a lot. “So you already asked her out.”

“Yes.”

“Where to?”

“Out.”

“Yeah- but out where?”

“... On a date?” Harry snarled in exasperation.

Niall pinched his thigh “Listen, mate. Want my help or not?”

“Well then help me. Stop asking silly questions!”

“It wasn’t silly. You gotta have a plan- you can’t just pick her up and go out. Out has to be somewhere specific. A cup of coffee, a walk, dinner, movies, a concert. Something.”

“Okay, I see. Alright.”

“So where are you taking her then?”

“Which do you suggest?”

“So the date is this evening. Like, in literal hours, and you haven’t got a plan yet?”

Harry inhaled deeply, trying to keep his cool. Niall was being infuriating, “No, mate. That is why I called, must I remind you? So that you could tell me what to do!”

“Bloody hell. Alright, okay. Let me ask Mitzy to make some calls to my usual spots and I’ll get back to you in a bit.”

Harry hung up and couldn’t help but worry a bit. The way Niall was putting it, he wasn’t at all ready for dating. The last thing he wanted was for Y/N to catch onto the fact that something was amiss, and he certainly didn’t want to appear inexperienced in any way in her eyes. He needed to ace this. Because this is what he did. He was good at everything he attempted. He wasn’t alpha for nothing.

Unlocking his phone again, he googled how to date. He couldn’t solely rely on Niall’s expertise on this, especially when the reason he was dating was just to have sex. His reason was far more complex and therefore he couldn’t treat it as superficially as Niall no doubt did.

He read through the search results. Put Yourself Out There. Keep an Open Mind. Stay Safe. Set Your Own Pace. Remember: Forming Connections Takes Time. Maintain a Positive Attitude.

Harry couldn’t help but grimace in disdain as he read through the 6 Essential Rules For Dating, only to then read the site to which it lead: brides.com

Scrolling further down with a frown, he stumbled across another set of rules: Be not afraid. · Be authentic. · Be outgoing. · Be responsive. · Be realistic, not desperate. · Be chill.

Niall’s call interrupted and Harry sighed in relief picking up, “What the fuck is wrong with humans?”

“I beg your pardon?” Niall laughed.

“I just Googled dating advice and all I got is a bunch of meaningless crap. Why are they so…“

“...So?”

The word he was going for was moronic, but he just couldn’t place his love interest in the same boat. No, since he’d met her he had new-found respect for this sub-evolved species, and he wanted to treat them fairly. “Nevermind… what have you got for me?”

“So it was too late to land any decent dinner reservations, but instead there is one last-minute option that I actually think would strike your fancy just as much.”

“Oh?”

“Still got that convertible?”

“The Ferrari Dino?”

“Damn, when’d you get that one? But no, I meant the Mercedes.”

“The 230sl? Of course. Would never dream of parting with her. She’s in the garage downtown.”

“Ok, dating tip number one: don’t refer to your cars as though they aren’t inanimate objects. Especially if someone could mistake you speaking about your girlfriend when in reality you’re referring to your car.”

“Priceless advice, Dr. Phill.”

Niall laughed, “Actually yeah, maybe search for some re-runs on youtube, I’m sure you’d love what he’s got to say. Anyway- chicks do love a fancy retro car, especially convertibles, so you’re already winning. Then, you take her to the drive-in for a movie. She’s guaranteed to jump on your lap.” Harry growled deep in his chest and Niall was quick to add “And yeah- you know- the works. Buy her some snacks, maybe get her a cocktail if she’s into that, if not make sure to get her a big ol’ milkshake- just go all out. Chicks love to see you’re not looking at money when it comes to spoiling them.”

Harry furrowed his brows. All this sounded pretty obvious to him. Of course, he’d want to treat her to a nice time in his nice car, impress her with his good taste in vintage automobiles, and then he’d want to treat her to a nice meal and have her well-satiated. Obviously, money would never be an issue when it came to her, he wasn’t exactly sure what Niall was thinking telling him all this. It was pretty self-explanatory.

“Ok. Then after the movie is over?”

“Well judging by how you growled at me just then I’m guessing you don’t want me giving you any pointers there.”

“Oh? Is it customary to have sex after a date, then?”

Niall sighed, rubbing his face, “Well. It depends on how serious you want to get with her. If you’re just looking for something casual, then yeah, you could shoot your shot. But if you want more, then I’d advise you refrained from anything too intimate just yet. You can test the waters, see where she’s at.”

“How do I gauge where she’s at?”

“At the end of the date, when you take her back to her place, go in for the kiss. If she doesn’t kiss you back then,... yeah, that’s not gonna happen, judging by that whole sexual tension between the two of you. So she’ll kiss you back for sure. Then you’re left with two options. She’ll either wish you good night or invite you in. If she invites you in, that’s a really good sign that she’s looking to move things along. If she hints at more, don’t hold back. Maybe she’s the one who wants it to be just casual, you know? But if you’re playing the long game then I’m afraid it’s customary to wait until the 3rd date at the earliest for sex. You can fool around a bit though- again, test to see her reactions and how far she’s willing to take things.”

Harry swallowed the lump in his throat listening to his friend. He knew good and well that if he went inside with her, things would no doubt escalate, as they had every single time they’d been confined together. It was therefore up to him to set the pace for this. And judging by what Niall was telling him, he needed to prove to her that he was in it for the long run, and the only way he could do that, was, ironically by holding back from bedding her. This was totally backwards if you asked him, and absolutely opposite of how he’d go about it with one of his own kind. 

But Y/N was used to this human courtship. And he had to adhere to their rules to win her over. He knew that, if he wanted to, he’d no doubt have her in his arms, more than willing by the end of the night, but he didn’t want her to think that’s all he was after. Because it wasn’t. He wanted all of her. And the only way to obtain that was by following these… rules.

*

Since Harry had been rather ambiguous about when their date was gonna start, she’d brought a change of clothes into work the next day. She figured she could leave her uniform there and change into it the following morning. Nick was on duty today so she knew she’d be on the receiving end of some serious side eye if Harry did show up to pick her up from work, and if he wouldn’t be there, then she’d know to drive back home, and wait for him to pick her up there. After all, he seemingly knew when she went off duty by the way he’d waited for her to pick her up and take her to the lake that evening.

Hours went by excruciatingly slowly. It seemed like ages had gone by until her workday was finally over. She didn’t even know what or how well she’d completed of the tasks she’d done throughout the day, her mind had been entirely occupied with all sorts of scenarios of how their date was going to play out.

She went into the rather small bathroom in the station and brushed out her dutch braids, her hair cascading in nice waves down her back as a result. She retouched her makeup and added more blush than she usually would, and even went for a winged eyeliner, giving her eyes a feline aspect she liked to sport from time to time. She accentuated the shape of her lips with a lip pencil, topped it off with lip stain since it was more durable (she was planning on reacquainting their lips a lot during the evening), and then finally went into one of the stalls and changed into the sundress she’d packed. The material was such that it didn’t wrinkle thus saving her a lot of trouble, but it was sufficiently low cut so that it was fit for a night out, and it only went up to her mid-thigh. She kept her white sneakers on, for a more casual look as well as making sure she didn’t overly exert her ankle still. She spritzed some perfume onto her pulse points and checked herself into the too-small mirror, hoping the fit would go with whatever Harry had in store for them for the evening. He hadn’t given her any heads up as to what she should wear, so she hoped this would be fine. She took her uniform into the spare room in the station where the bed was set, and neatly placed it on the back of a chair in lieu of a hanger. 

Just as she was emerging from said room, Lindsy whistled lowly taking her in, “Well, well, well. Should I be looking for the G-wagon outside then?”

“What G-wagon?” Nick popped his head from inside the main office, “Oh… wow. You look nice, Y/N. Special occasion?”

“Her boyfriend’s.” Lindsy wiggled her eyebrows at Nick.

“He’s–” Y/N caught herself just before she could correct Lindsy. Actually- she still wanted Nick to think she and Harry were involved, so why not just solidify that idea, just in case he did show up to pick her up from the station.

“He’s so fucking hot.” Lindsy groaned. “And loaded, apparently.”

Y/N normally would’ve elbowed Lindsy for her indiscretion but seeing the way Nick was looking confused, no doubt wondering if this boyfriend was none other than the man who’d threatened him at the bar that night, had her amused, she couldn’t lie.

Just then, the sound of a car driving onto the small graveled parking lot made Lindsy go straight for the window again. “Oh, my fucking god. Loaded is quite the understatement for Mr. Boyfriend, I’m afraid.”

Nick walked over to the window before Y/N could, curiosity getting the best of him. Lindsy saw the expression on his face and couldn’t help but laugh out loud, “I’d be jealous too, man. Look at that beauty. Mm-hmm.”

Y/N finally managed to peer outside from between the two of them. It was Harry, alright, in a… white convertible? 

“How did he even drive it all the way up here… that must be hell for his suspension,” Nick muttered to himself and Y/N didn’t wanna waste another moment. She’d been dying to see him and the sooner she could get into his car, the sooner they could drive off and she could properly take him all in. And kiss him. Definitely kiss him. A lot.

She grabbed her purse and walked outside and Harry had just stepped out of his car when he turned and took the sight of her in.

For a good moment, all the plans he’d made for the night went out the window. He wanted nothing more but to pick up from where they’d left off at the lake that night. She looked phenomenal. He’d never seen her like this. She was more than beautiful in his eyes, but she’d obviously put in effort to look pretty for their date and the result had him weak in the knees. 

He was used to seeing her in her uniform. Aside from that quick trip to Niall’s office that weekend, when he’d woken her up and she’d barely had time to brush her teeth and change out of her pajamas, he’d not really seen her outside those bulky, tame clothes. 

Well, that was a lie. He did see her with nothing on, after all.

But this was different. And his mind inadvertently went to that top drawer in her bedroom where he’d accidentally discovered her extensive and quite racy lingerie collection. He wondered if she was wearing any of those sets underneath that flimsy dress she had on. A pretty dress that hugged her curves just right- Harry could cry as his eyes unashamedly scanned her head to toe as she approached him.

Everything went quiet around him when he zeroed in on her pouty lips just inches away from his own. He needed to taste them, quite urgently, but he knew he had to refrain until the end of the date to prove his intentions were serious. He wanted to play this by the book but she made it near impossible. His eyes unglued themselves from her pretty mouth and took in her rosy cheeks, her sultry eyes, then her luscious hair. She was… more than he’d ever dreamed of. He didn’t know how he’d gotten so lucky. Suddenly, all the pressure he felt regarding the challenges he was going to have to face pursuing her felt insignificant. She was worth it, she was so worth it.

Y/N was well aware of how Harry was drinking her in. She loved his reaction and was exactly what she’d been hoping for. But she was busy ogling him as well. He was wearing a sheer blouse and was smelling absolutely divine. She stepped inside his car as he held the door for her and soon her hair was fluttering all around her as they drove off, away from the preserve and into the city. 

Y/N busied herself shuffling radio stations. It became apparent to her that they hadn’t spoken a word to each other, but they kept stealing glances of one another. Neither would look away when they caught the other looking. 

“Nice car.” Y/N finally broke the comfortable silence when they sat at the first stop sign.

“Thank you.”

“So you have a thing for cars?”

“I do, actually. It’s a passion of mine.”

“An expensive passion, one might argue.”

Aha, so Niall had been right in assuming she’d be impressed by his collection. Of course, she’d barely even scratched the surface, he had a lot more in his garage downtown. The G-wagon was the one he drove the most since it was the only one that could get him into their village. But when he was handling business he switched it for one of the many others. 

“I’m not in the habit of denying myself the pleasures life has to offer,” he shrugged. 

Y/N could feel herself heat up at that statement. She certainly hoped he didn’t.

Harry was trying to pace himself, knowing he had a long evening ahead of him. But the way she was fidgeting in her seat, rubbing her thighs together, he wanted nothing more than to stick his hand between them and if anything, just hold her steady. She was distracting him from his plan.

“You’re walking a lot better already.” he pointed out, trying to steer the conversation in a different way.

“Yeah. I feel so much better. It hardly even hurts anymore, but I try and remind myself to take it easy still. Where are you taking me?”

“You’ll see soon enough.”

“Oh? Is it a surprise, then?”

“Do you like surprises?”

“Depends.”

“On what?”

“Well, I guess it depends on if it’s a good surprise or not.”

Harry furrowed his brows smilingly “Fair enough. I think it’s a good surprise.”

“Then I’m sure I’ll like it.”

Harry took a mental note of that. He couldn’t say the same for himself though. Every time life had taken him by surprise it had been unpleasant. He liked to feel in control, liked knowing what to expect when to expect it, so he didn’t imagine he’d enjoy any kind of surprises, not even the good ones.

Pulling into the drive-in he heard Y/N’s small gasp. “Oh, wow! I never would’ve expected this!”

“It’s a nice night, figured we could take advantage.”

Y/N smiled to herself. She hoped he’d take advantage. Maybe this meant he’d want to fool around with her a bit. She was already on edge and he hadn’t even so much as kissed her cheek.

After parking in a decent spot, they got out of Harry’s car and walked to the concession stand, which to Harry’s dismay did not have the kind of menu he’d hoped for. 

“This is all junk food,” he pointed out.

Y/N laughed, “Of course it is. What did you think you’d get at a drive-in?”

Harry honestly didn’t know. He didn’t imagine the selection of food would be so poor. 

They settled on a soda pop, a big strawberry milkshake, a hotdog with all the toppings for Harry, cheesy tater tots for Y/N, and a box of chocolate-covered peanuts which they then brought back to Harry’s car.

Harry took a big bite of his hot dog and stopped chewing the moment he tasted the mixture of toppings that Y/N had told him he needed to get. It was awful. A soggy bun with a salty tube of meat melding with a sweet and tangy pickled gelatinous concoction, a fake runny cheese substance, raw onions, and mustard. This was… not good. 

He looked over at Y/N as he forced himself to gulp down the horrid thing as she was happily popping her cheesy tater tots into her mouth. He noted it was the same cheese on his hot dog. 

Unwrapping the foul thing he wiped off the toppings into the paper and used one of the napkins to hold the hotdog and tried again. It was better. Still not good. A grilled ribeye steak sounded much better to him at that moment. Even a bowl of macaroni and cheese (made with real cheese) would have been better.

“You don’t like it?” 

Harry turned his head toward the girl as she eyeballed what he had left of his hotdog, “No. All those toppings were making it worse. What kind of tricks are you trying to play on me?” Harry laughed.

“I’m not! That’s what I’d put on my hotdog if I were going to get one. Do you want my tater tots? We can trade?”

Harry shook his head, “No. It’s got that abysmal excuse for cheese sauce on it. Probably all soaked into the potato.”

Y/N scoffed,” Abysmal? This is nacho cheese sauce, you uncultured man! You cannot talk shit about nacho cheese sauce. It’s classic concession-stand food!”

Harry laughed and shook his head, “It’s awful.”

Y/N held up a tater tot to Harry, “Here, this one is untouched by the cheese sauce. You can have it.”

Harry tilted his head and smiled before opening his mouth up to let her put it into his mouth.

Pushing the tater tot past his lips, Y/N enjoyed how his tongue jutted out and the pad of her finger came into contact with the wet muscle for a moment.

“Good?”

“Better,” he smirked.

Harry tuned the station on his radio to the drive-in channel and kept the volume low. 

He flagged down the hostess who was making her rounds after he finished off his sad excuse for a meal. He decided to order a bucket of buttered popcorn, as he was still hungry. And when he saw that there were cocktails on the menu he figured he’d order one for Y/N.

It wasn’t often that she got to look at him without him casting his undivided attention on her. She wasn’t sure what he’d asked her while he placed their drink order, lost in thought while admiring his side profile talking to the hostess. He was quite the specimen, Harry. Yes, he was. And the way he carried himself talking to other people was a sight to behold as well. He was so assertive and self-assured, she couldn’t even dream of exerting that kind of self-confidence. So, truly, she hadn't been worried about where he was going to take her on their date or what they were going to do, or even what cocktail he was ordering her. It was just something about him that made her want to surrender and let him take over, and this was quite new to Y/N. She was a very independent woman, and she was no pushover by any means. She always stood her ground, always went for what she wanted, never let anything stand in her way, and most of all, never let a man control her in any way. She was quite the rebellious kid, even her own father could never really discipline her the way he’d wanted to. She was more stubborn than even her own brother, and she’d been quite the tomboy growing up. It was why she went to military school and pursued this career. She was not a girly girl by any means.

But there was just something about Harry that brought out her feminine side a lot. She didn’t have to step into her own masculine that much now that a true male was by her side. He was there, and she felt safe. Taken care of. 

She felt conflicted over these feelings. Her independent nature wasn’t used to letting her guard down. But his presence comforted her and made her want to explore this side she’d repressed since forever. All her previous boyfriends had told her she was too bossy, too stubborn, that she emasculated them. And now she was realizing that the right man would never feel that way around her.

The hostess left and he turned to look at her just as she was coming to the conclusion. The right man. Was that him? What about all the things she didn’t know about him still? What about the cabin, what about the expensive cars, the designer clothes? What was he hiding? That was the only thing that kept her from fully jumping into things with Harry. He was still quite the mystery to her. It felt wild that she could feel so safe in his presence, fully aware of how much he wasn’t telling her. How did he manage to do that? How was he disarming her in such a manner?

“So what movie are we watching?”

Harry paused, looking around for a bit, “I’m… not quite sure.”

Y/N laughed, “Are you serious?”

“The whole point of this, sweetheart, is to spend time in your presence. You wanted a date so I took you out on a date. I couldn’t care less what movie is showing, to tell you the truth.”

Y/N’s mouth fell slightly agape at that. He had a habit of rendering her speechless and again- contrary to how she’d normally react to that feeling, loved it. 

“Is that alright?” he pinched her chin between his thumb and his forefinger and dropped his gaze to her lips.

“Yes.” she managed, her eyes dropping to his lips as well. She wanted nothing more than to finally feel his mouth on hers again. She’d normally have taken the plunge by now, but Harry had a way about him that made her want to let him set the pace.

And for a moment she felt he’d go in for the kiss, but the lights went out and the movie began rolling on the big projector ahead. He removed himself and sat back in his seat and so did she.

It wasn’t long before the hostess returned with their order, and with the popcorn placed between them, they were silent for a bit as the movie started. The popcorn was better than the hotdog by far. Harry was taking big palmfuls and scooping it into his mouth. He was rather hungry. He hadn’t imagined the food would be so bad at the concession stand. 

Y/N watched him munch the popcorn, his jaw working as he chewed. Everything he did was attractive. Even watching him chew food had her body warming up.

When he’d swallowed his mouthful he knew she’d been looking at him so he moved his head to look back at her, “How’s your drink?” 

Y/N kept her head leaned on the seat’s headrest as she watched Harry. She had a bit of hair over her face so he reached over to move it away before she could answer, his knuckle brushing against her cheek.

“Thank you,” she smiled, “And it’s really good. If I had been paying attention this is exactly what I would have ordered myself.”

Harry liked how she responded just then. It was a simple touch and he was doing everything in his power not to slide his hand up her skirt and squeeze her thigh like he wanted. Well, he wanted far more than just that. She smelled delectable and the bottom hem of her dress was sitting at her mid-thigh. He could imagine laying her seat back and pulling her legs over the center console and diving right in. She’d like it too. He’d make sure of it.

Harry wanted to devour her. Drag her into his lap and feel her fragile body against his. Put his hands on any skin he could see, and move his palms underneath the fabric to places he couldn’t see. 

But Harry was going to be a gentleman. He was going to do what Niall told him to. At least in part. It was killing him to see her bare thigh only inches from him and not do anything about it. And he had a hard time peeling his gaze from where her soft breasts were covered by the fabric of her dress. He could easily pull the material down and have her in full view. Suck on them. Nip at the smooth skin…

Y/N bit her lip when she noticed Harry kept looking over at her. She felt his gaze on her. She liked it, though. She wanted him to do something. To reach across and press his lips against hers. She could straddle his lap and wrap her arms around his shoulders and let him paw at her all he wanted. 

Y/N had seemed to enjoy her cocktail, so when the hostess came to clear everything up he ordered her another one. He knew how little alcohol went into these things and he wasn’t worried in that regard. He wanted her to loosen up a bit though, something was on her mind and she wasn’t relaxing the way he’d have liked her to. He wanted her to enjoy their date- after all- it’s what humans liked, wasn’t it? Had the movie been a wrong choice? He hadn’t seen it before and wasn’t really paying attention, but from what he could tell it was a typical romantic comedy, pretty enjoyable by the way other people were laughing around them. Y/N giggled at a few scenes but he could tell she wasn’t really paying attention to it either.

By the time she finished her second cocktail and he removed the empty cup from her hands, he took note of her icy fingers. She then pressed her hands in between her thighs and curled in on herself a bit and that’s when he realized she must’ve been cold. Of course, she was- they were standing idle in an open field, it was well into the night and she was only wearing that flimsy dress. 

“Cold?”

She glanced over at him “A bit. Sorry. I didn’t think to bring a jacket.”

Harry pondered for a moment “Let’s move to the backseat so we can sit closer and I can keep you warm, hm?”

Y/N nodded and followed him to the backseat, and he immediately opened up his arms for her, and pushed her flush to his side, rubbing his warm hand up and down her arm. 

It was torture, this date. Harry felt like he could howl. Who had come up with this shit?! Why were they playing this silly game? They were no better than a pair of birds dancing around one another when both knew exactly how this was going to end. He was going to claim her as his, and she’d let him. They both wanted it. What was the use for this preamble? All it did was irritate him. He wanted to touch, sniff, lick, pound, and he wasn’t sure how long he was going to be able to deny his instincts around her. 

And the more he thought about it, the less sense it made. How did he let Niall convince him into doing this? They’d already had their first kiss. She’d already invited him inside. They’d already seen each other naked. This was ridiculous! This was taking a huge step back. It was probably confusing her just as much as it did him. It didn’t feel natural. It didn’t feel right, keeping his distance like this. 

He rested his hand on her hipbone and squeezed slightly, watching as she crossed her legs in response. Atop of what he could see, was what he could smell, of course. And he could feel her whole body tingling underneath his touch whenever he did something like that. She was just as riled up as he was.

Y/N swallowed thickly. She could feel her skin heat up and she knew she was starting to wet her panties. Nothing they were doing was that wild or sexy. But there was something about it being Harry. About how she knew he could do anything he wanted and yet he was only softly touching her. Keeping himself calm while Y/N was practically in a puddle and on the verge of telling him to take her back to her apartment so they could continue where they left off at the lake. 

But Harry was anything but calm. He was already beginning to thicken under his zipper, which was quite uncomfortable. He scolded himself for getting hard from barely even touching but his body’s response to Y/N had never been normal. Maybe he should start wearing joggers around her. He laughed to himself.

“What?” 

Harry looked down at the girl and he nearly lost it. Her lips were bitten and red, her pupils dilated, her chest rising and falling and her thighs pressed together. If this wasn’t the look of a female begging to be fucked…

“I just had a funny thought. Nothing really. Uh, feeling a little warmer now?”

Y/N nodded as she bit her lip again. She hadn’t even realized she’d been doing it but when she saw the way Harry’s eyes followed her mouth she released her bottom lip and then licked her lips, again, without conscious intention. Harry let out a small puff of breath and kept his eyes on her mouth as she spoke, “I feel a lot better. Thank you, Harry.”

That way she spoke his name felt erotic. To them both. She hadn’t intended on his name being spoken so breathily and Harry thought he would lose his mind imagining that that was how she’d say his name when he was pleasuring her. He’d gotten a glimpse the night before on the phone and couldn’t stop imagining the sound.

He buried his nose in her hair and inhaled deeply. She was going to be the death of him.

Her one hand rested on his thigh, and she began scratching with her nails, ever so slightly, just like a kitten. She looked it, with those feline eyes tonight. He wanted to make her purr.

Y/N squirmed in her seat, angling herself slightly toward Harry when she felt his nose in her hair and his breath down her neck. She wanted more. She was feeling antsy and when she could feel his fingers dig into her hip again she decided it was time to move things along. Her patience was wearing thin.

She moved her head away and he mourned the loss of her scent right under his nose for a moment before she brought her lips to his ear “Can we skip the rest?”

*

Harry hated feeling unsure. Hated not being in control. He wanted to do right by her and show her he was serious, but he couldn’t deny his primal nature and the way he felt he should go about it in his bones. She was calling out to him, and she’d even cut their date short, asking him to take her home. That must’ve meant she wanted him, right?

But he had to make sure. He wasn’t well versed in these human rituals, and he couldn’t risk fucking it up. Not when it came to her. 

“That was really nice, Harry. Thank you.” There it was again. The way she said his name was like an invitation for more. And that’s what it must have been. If Harry’s instincts were right about her then she was feeling the same intensity of emotions and lust as he was. If she was really his like he hoped, then they were both on the same page.

Getting out of the car, Harry walked her to her door, keeping as close as possible. He hadn’t liked being so far away from her when he was driving them back after the movie. He knew he needed to tone it down with how touchy he wanted to be with her. He wanted to have her in his lap the entire drive back. He felt like she was his already and his natural inclination was to have some part of himself in physical contact with her at all times. But until he knew for sure she was feeling what he was, he’d keep himself in line.

Y/N was feeling shaky in anticipation as they walked toward her apartment and as soon as they got to her door she felt his warm hand at the small of her back. She was losing her mind. She just wanted to jump his bones and run her hands through his hair. She wanted to tell him all about her past and ask him about his. She wanted to kiss him. She wanted a kiss. It was all she wanted all night. His warm mouth covering hers at the lake was still felt deep in her core and she couldn’t wait anymore. Not even one minute longer.

Harry was taken aback at first, that she’d been so bold, but he felt like he could breathe for the first time that evening when his lips finally came into contact with hers as she stood on her tiptoes and pulled him down so they could finally kiss. He pulled her into his body, his arms wrapping around her low back and they both sighed in relief. He cradled her delicate face into his big palms and kissed her gently at first- tentatively- making sure he was reading this right, but when she placed her smaller hands atop of his and deepened the kiss, he barely managed to pull away enough for her to unlock her door.

Harry stared down at her and part of him wondered if this is where the date would end. Niall warned him that sometimes a date would just end with a kiss. He sure hoped that wasn’t the case but he didn’t want to push his luck. 

He was ready to beg her to let him in if she told him goodnight. He didn’t want to be pushy but he needed more. It had moved past just something he wanted. He needed it. It had his entire body aching and straining.

But he didn’t have to beg. She grasped his hand as she pushed her door open and pulled him in with her. Stepping inside she fumbled to turn on a lamp and turning back around, he pounced on her, pressing her into the inside of the door. She welcomed his urgency, relished in it, had waited for the tension to snap the whole night and finally it had. She couldn’t resist moaning wantonly into his mouth feeling his palms roam over her body. That’s what she’d craved the whole evening, his hands on her, and now she felt like she couldn’t fit inside her own skin.

When he began kissing down her neck, Harry growled at the feel of her delicate skin there, the way he could feel her pulse under his lips, the way he licked where he wanted to bite and leave his mark. Y/N scratched her nails gently against the scalp at the nape of his neck and it made him feral. He didn’t know how she instinctively knew what he wanted her to do, but she pushed all his buttons just right. 

Her breathy moans and whimpers made him want nothing more than to pleasure her. He wanted to feel her shake in his arms, wanted to hear her whisper his name in his ear when he made her feel good, just the way she’d done the previous night over the phone.

“Sorry for cutting our date short… but I wanted to be alone with you. Is that so wrong?”

Harry pulled away, shaking his head and looking at her, placing his hand where his lips had just been and securing it around her throat, “How could it be wrong? Can’t you feel how right this is? Feel that?” he squeezed gently and Y/N rolled her eyes back in ecstasy, nodding as best she could against the door.

“I feel it. I want you to feel me. Feel all of me. Please.”

Harry squeezed his eyes shut at her pleading. He doubted she could make out his eyes in the semi-darkness but he couldn’t risk it with how out of his mind he felt in that moment. He bent in to kiss her again, licking into her mouth with languid strokes while his free hand explored her body, lower and lower until he reached the hem of her dress. He snaked his hand beneath it and squeezed the outside of her thigh, then the round of her ass, biting her lower lip a bit as he did that. He couldn’t wait to sink his teeth into her flesh there. He grabbed her asscheek, squeezing tightly, and he could smell her arousal pooling in between her thighs. He wasted not a moment longer before bringing his hand back up front and grazing his fingers where she wanted him most.

Y/N couldn’t help but thrust her pelvis towards him, going on her tip-toes. She winced from the pain that shot through her ankle in doing so and Harry cursed under his breath for overlooking this. He needed to get her into a position she wouldn’t thrash about. Without a second thought, he grabbed her into his arms and her legs went around his middle, bringing them to her couch. He sat down carefully, mindful of her legs, and he made sure she was resting her weight on his lap and her knees were comfortably on either side of him on the cushions. Harry whined as his fingers found the meatiest part of her bottom again when he felt the fabric of her lacy thong at the center. 

She panted into his mouth when she felt his fingers on her bare bum under her skirt. Her thong wasn’t covering much but she didn’t care. She wanted his hands all over her. Y/N scooted herself in closer as Harry continued slowly kissing her mouth, using his tongue to wet her lips and then slipping it against hers. She was losing her composure. She ground her hips into Harry’s and felt his solid erection under his jeans. 

One of his hands gathered her hair at her back and twisted it around his fist, tilting her head back and exposing her neck to him once more, while the other went in between her thighs gently feeling her soft skin as he moved his fingertips higher and closer to where her scent was beckoning him and found the crotch of her soaked panties once more. He latched his lips at her pulse point again and, pulling the drenched material to the side, he ran his fingers ever so slightly against her wet core.

“Oh my god, Harry. Don’t tease…” she mewled and Harry smiled against her neck.

“Thought you said you wanted me to feel all of you,” his thumb found her clit and she cried out in pleasure. Ah, he loved her response to him. He’d never had such an expressive lover before. He was enjoying it a lot. He’d never dragged it out with anyone this long, either. Sex was usually just that- sex. Adequate foreplay to lubricate everything enough so that it was enjoyable for both parties and nothing more. Harry had always enjoyed foreplay, but it was a means to an end. A way to heighten his own pleasure further on. But this time, he found that he enjoyed this tremendously without even considering anything in return. He loved pleasuring her just for the sake of doing just that- the way she was responding to him was spurring him on and giving him pleasure more than any form of foreplay he’d received in return had ever.

She pushed herself onto her knees against his hand as she tentatively lowered one of her own to his crotch, palming him through his jeans. She gasped at the feel of him hard and straining underneath the fabric and she quickly glanced up at his face to check for permission but his eyes were shut tightly, his nose flared as if he was trying to keep himself in check. When he didn’t stop her, she took it as her cue to begin unbuttoning his pants. 

The moment his button was undone and the zipper was yanked at, Harry groaned and pushed himself back, “Hold on…” he said as he reached inside his pants to straighten himself out more comfortably. Freeing himself of the confinement of his skinny jeans was a relief, but that’s all he would allow himself- knowing full well that if he let her touch him he’d slip over the edge and there’d be no turning back. But he loved her eagerness to please, and it was taking all of his concentrated willpower to hold back.

Y/N watched with her lips parted as he brought himself out. His tip was just there. She held her breath as she lowered her hand once more. She hadn’t had the chance to touch it before. She started to scoot back for more space and wiggled in his lap to adjust her position but Harry pulled on her hair in reprimand, “No. Stay still, sweetheart. You’re going to hurt yourself, and I’ll stop. Want me to stop?”

She shook her head and he let go of her hair, allowing her to straighten up and kiss him “Don’t stop. I need you.”

She could never tire of kissing him. He was giving it his all with every kiss. Leaving her breathless, so much so that she had to pull up for air every now and then. All the while, Harry was rubbing at her pussy in lazy circles, driving her wild. She needed more, but it felt so good like this too. The smell of his own arousal was beckoning her, and she wanted to touch too. She wanted to do a lot more than just touch. But, again, she was willing to let him set the pace, and part of her was taken aback that he’d stopped her. Most guys in his place would’ve happily accepted her returning the favor. She knew he was just teasing her, egging her on. And the anticipation was only heightening her senses. 

Breaking the kiss, Harry brought his free middle finger to her mouth, “Suck”.

She closed her mouth around him, pretending he was letting her go down on him like she so desperately craved to. Harry’s labored breathing was telling her he was waiting for that moment to happen just as much as she was, if not more. “Slide my ring off and spit it out. Go on.”

He could feel her gush against his fingers at his words and bit his lower lip watching her do as instructed. God, she was perfect. Harry would’ve never been able to conjure her up in his wildest fantasies. The way she was responding to him exceeded anything he could’ve wished for.

“This one too.” he pushed his index finger into her mouth next and watched her do the same, spitting the second ring somewhere on the couch next to the other one. “That’s a good girl.” He caressed her cheek with the back of his hand and then switched his hand for the other, bringing his ringless fingers to her entrance. 

She watched between heavy lids as he brought the other hand to his mouth, sucking the tips of his fingers into his mouth and humming low in his chest, closing his eyes. He’d had a hint of her taste before, of course, this was fresh and wet and he just simply couldn’t deny himself. 

This was different. She was different, a lot different to the females he’d been with from his own pack. She was sweeter, stickier, and now that he’d had a proper taste he was never going back. “Fuck me, Y/N. You taste so good. I’m going to want my tongue in there next. But you’ve earned my fingers for now, hm? …You want a finger, kitten?” He nudged at her entrance as he asked.

“P…please!” 

Y/N buried her own hands deeper into his hair and hung on for dear life as Harry finally began fingering her, slowly at first. How could he deny her when she asked so nicely.

“Mmmmm… Harry…. More-” Y/N pleaded in between moans. And by more, she wanted his cock. She knew he was just as turned on and that despite how large he was, with how worked up she’d gotten, he’d be able to push his way in and she wanted so badly to feel it. Not that she didn’t enjoy his finger. She just wanted more. She wanted to feel him in every way. Inside of her and all around her. 

Harry grunted on each thrust of his finger and then adding the second, he began picking up the pace. She could hear exactly how wet she was and she knew she'd make a mess out of his trousers even, but she didn’t care. His free hand went to her breast then, and thumbed at her nipple through the fabric, circling it and tugging at it just enough; then his mouth found hers again and she could still taste herself on his tongue. He then angled his palm and she cried out when he began pressing into her G-spot just right. Normally, Y/N needed clitoral stimulation no matter what, but he was doing something right, something she couldn’t replicate herself seemingly because she was sure she was going to burst any moment.

“Harry-” she grasped his hair tight and began to move her hips in time with his thrusts.

Harry tried to hold back the purr that began to vibrate from his chest but he was feeling the ecstasy just as much as she was. Her scent and her noises, the way she was yanking at his hair… and then when he felt her grinding herself down on his fingers he choked out a moan as his chest began to purr. 

He moved his mouth closer to her ear, “Fuck, Y/N… getting my whole hand wet, kitten. Good girl. Take what you need.”

“Oh god. Oh, fuck. Harry!”

“That’s it!” he nosed at her neck again, sucking the skin there into his mouth just a tiny bit, powerless to resist, “Say my name when I make you come, show me who you belong to.”

Y/N couldn’t believe how much hearing that spurred her on. The tone of his voice, so much deeper and graver than usual, the way in which he’d said it, leaving no room for interpretation or hesitation on her part made her let go and cry out his name as she came, over and over again. He didn’t let up until she slumped against his body, spent and euphoric and he rested against the back of the couch in turn, while she came to her senses in his arms.

She couldn’t put the feelings she had into words but everything about him was something that just felt right. It felt real. She felt safe with him and revered by him. She felt like she could trust him completely. Implicitly. 

Harry nuzzled into her neck to calm himself as her breathing slowed. He soon realized the contrast between his own labored breathing and her own had increased significantly, her body grew heavier against his and her heartbeats were barely audible to his heightened hearing- the girl had fallen asleep. He was surprised, but relieved because he still had a very pressing matter that wasn’t going to go away anytime soon, and if she tried to paw at him again he was sure to cave in this time around. Seeing her come apart in his arms the way she just had rendered him speechless. It was an image that would be forever imprinted on his retinae. And if he could make her come undone like that using just his two fingers, Harry was more than eager to find out how her body would react to taking him fully. 

Just the visual of that thought had him leaking precome. Harry had never needed to reign it in like this. As an alpha, he usually got whatever he wanted whenever he wanted it. He was not used to denying himself anything.

But yet, here he was, holding the most delicious being in his arms and keeping himself from absolutely ravaging her. The hardest part of that was that he knew she wanted it. So why was he doing this to himself? She’d be worth it. That’s why. Everything about the way they interacted had suddenly become so natural and so implicit that his doubts were few about what he wanted when it came to her. And he wanted her. So he’d do this right. He’d play the little game and he’d bide his time if that’s what it took. 

Although what he really wanted was to lay her flat on the couch and stick his nose right into her pussy, lick her clean. Take her flavor with him in his mouth like a parting gift.

Willing those thoughts away so he could focus on the task at hand, he held her carefully as he stood up from the couch and carried her to her bed. He hadn’t bothered turning on any lights in her bedroom but his heightened night vision could make out her pretty features in the dark with no difficulty. 

Laying her down gently, his nose picked up a familiar scent, and then he saw his own shirt he’d lent her at the lake in a puddle on the floor. Picking it up, he discovered a pair of panties in there as well, catching them just as they were about to hit the floor. Without hesitation, he stuffed them into his back pocket for… safekeeping. 

By the looks of it, she’d worn his shirt to bed. The thought alone had him purring again. She slept swaddled in his scent, the fabric of his shirt against her bare skin. She’d needed to feel his presence around her. 

He’d meant to drape a blanket over her sleeping form, but his shirt was large enough to cover her torso comfortably, and his scent would make her feel safe even in her dreams in his absence. 

He lingered a bit at the side of her bed, caressing her cheek with the back of his hand, watching her fast asleep and completely unbothered that she had a strange man in her house.

Harry knew well enough that Y/N had her reservations about him- as she should. He would’ve found her silly and reckless had she not. No, she knew he had his secrets but was choosing to trust him, but he didn’t expect her to be so vulnerable around him so soon. Sure, she’d fallen asleep on him once before- but that was back when she’d suffered what was probably the fright of her life so far (and Harry would make sure, from here on out, certainly). It was a normal reaction coming down from such an adrenaline rush. But this? This he did not expect. Her body was reacting to him instinctively. It recognized his presence was safe and comforting. And Harry reveled in that.

Harry began to back out of the room and stopped in the doorframe. He couldn’t bear the idea of parting from her so soon. He roamed his eyes over her figure. Even hidden under his shirt, or especially so, her body was beckoning him. 

He couldn’t will his feet to step away from the door. He’d just been knuckles deep inside of her. Bringing his hand to his nose he inhaled deeply and his eyes fluttered shut. He couldn't believe the restraint he’d proven not to take her then and there on the couch earlier.

But still, as much as it went against every cell in his body, he knew, rationally, that he must pace himself with her. She was not like his kind. Humans didn’t act on instinct the way they did. They didn’t understand the gravity of mating like that- the implications, the bond they’d create that nobody could ever break. Because, after all, this wouldn’t be just sex with her. This was already so much more than that.

Opening his eyes, he didn’t care to be mindful of them glowing golden. It was hard keeping himself in check like that with how much she riled him up, but not impossible. However, she couldn’t see him now, fast asleep- looming in the dark like that, preying upon her with a watering mouth.

He was achy and literally leaking. Looking down at himself, He was still hard as a rock and his tip was peeking out from over his pants, which he’d yet to zip back up. In fact, it might have been impossible to zip and button his pants with the state his dick was in. 

He brought that same hand, the fingers that had just been inside both her pretty mouth and her sweet, tight cunt, and wrapped it around himself, shuddering at the feel and instant relief. He was so pent-up that all he’d need was a few tugs. And she was right there, her scent was encompassing him, her sweet huffs in her slumber, the way her lips were slightly parted, the way her eyelashes fluttered in deep sleep. Her breath would catch at times and he thought that maybe she’d wake up and see him like that- see the real him, the predator that he was, looming in the dark, with golden eyes and primal urges he was born to give in to. 

This is who he was. 

Not the man sharing popcorn with her feet away from each other.

Cutting their date short, then initiating that kiss the way she had, and finally trying to touch and pleasure him made him believe that she was not interested in playing games either, though. The silly games people engage in that Niall and the internet had informed him about. She was going with her gut instinct more than her rational mind, and he knew it. He could see her apprehensiveness but even so, she gave in to her lust. Maybe they were more alike than he’d realized.

Part of him wished she’d wake up and see him, see the real him, and still want him just as much as she had moments prior. Would she? Could she ever see the real him and possibly want him even more? Could he risk showing her more of him? The thought of her enjoying his perverted ways spurred him on even more, the thought of her possibly being turned on by what he was doing. 

He came undone rapidly, picking a discarded sock off the floor and hoping she’d blame the washing machine for mismatching a pair while trying to regulate his breathing and be as quiet as possible. Coming to his senses a bit, he was more aware of how risky this had been.

But worth it.

He folded the sock in itself and stuffed it into his pocket, zipping himself back up. Just then, he heard the softest whimper she emitted in her sleep and Harry stepped closer with the intention of caressing her again before he left, but, extending his hand, he caught glimpse of a bit of come he’d missed on his thumb just there. His eyes sparked with mischief as he smirked to himself, and swiped his thumb across her lower lip, wetting it with his essence. The parting gift he’d wanted for himself he’d given her instead. Lewd. Dirty. But god did he love the way it looked against her mouth. A mark of sorts. His first marking on her. 

The sight alone made him stiffen right back up in his pants and his eyes widened even more when, subconsciously, the tip of her tongue wet her lips. 

Harry all but ran out of her apartment before he could cause any real irreparable damage.

*

Blinking her eyes open, Y/N knew something was amiss when she felt her socks against the bedding. Why would she be wearing–

Then his scent invaded her senses and she took note of Harry’s shirt draped over her middle and it all came rushing back to her-the date, what happened after the date, but she drew a blank as to how she’d gotten into bed. She remembered falling onto his chest after that mind-numbing orgasm he’d coaxed out of her, and she remembered his warm breath in her hair as he combed his fingers soothingly through it, his other hand caressing up and down her thigh.

She just felt so content, so perfectly relaxed in his arms that she must’ve fallen asleep. That had never happened before. Usually the first few times she was intimate with someone new, she’d have trouble finding sleep if they spent the night. Let alone fall asleep in their arms like that. 

But it was just the way Harry made her feel. Safe and taken care of, that her body naturally trusted him to do just that.

By the looks of it, though, he hadn’t spent the night. He’d tucked her in and left, but there was just one issue- he’d left her socks on. And while Y/N understood why he’d be weary of undressing her without her express consent, even after all they’d already done together and seen of each other, she couldn’t help but wonder- was he the kind to wear socks to bed? Because if he was, as wonderful as the previous night had been, she’d have to end it before it even began. She couldn’t date a monster.

She decided to text him to apologize. The poor guy had to go back home with blue balls and on top of that he didn’t even get a thank you kiss for that amazing orgasm… and maybe another kiss good night, too. 

“I’m sorry for falling asleep :( I feel awful…”

His response was rather prompt,

“Oh? Here I was thinking you were feeling good to have fallen asleep like that.”

“... You know what I meant. I never got to thank you properly.”

“You want to thank me properly, kitten?”

Y/N bit the lapel of his shirt, barely containing her grin at the use of the pet name,

“Yes.”

“I’m caught up with some business but will clear up time over the weekend, and I’ll let you do all the thanking you want. How’s that sound?”

Y/N deflated a bit. That was days away. She’d hoped to see him sooner. Also, what business? This just reiterated how little she actually knew about him. 

“We’ll see how grateful I still feel by then :)”

“We shall see.”

*

Y/N was not feeling fabulous. She figured she must’ve been experiencing withdrawal. The past few days had been agonizing. She realized her little crush might be a little more than just a crush with how much she was thinking about him, and how much she was craving being in his presence. It didn’t even have to be remotely sexual- she just wanted to be around him. Learn more about him. She just… wanted to take things further. 

It was finally Friday though, so if he was going to stay true to his word they’d be seeing each other soon. But by the way he was seemingly treating this, whatever it was, between them, it seemed like he was just looking for something casual with her. He hadn’t so much as called since they’d texted that morning. Which, maybe was her own doing- maybe she’d given him the wrong idea with how she’d all but jumped his bones cutting their date short like that. And the way she’d taken her bra off at the lake that evening. And, well. Maybe had she not been so ready to jump into bed with him he’d be pursuing more than just that with her right now. 

Or maybe she was being ridiculous and this was a grown man and not a high school jock. 

She was sick of these dating games. Was sick of holding back, and playing by the rules as to not appear too desperate or needy and give the other person the wrong impression. What was so wrong in showing you were interested? Yeah- she’d done what felt right in the moment and she didn’t regret it, not at all. She just hoped he knew that that was not the only thing she wanted from him. Because she genuinely liked his presence and wanted to explore this connection further, see what could potentially be there. 

She mindlessly played with the rings she was wearing on her necklace while she contemplated that at the station- this was the last day she’d have to do boring office duty and she was more than ready to come in on Monday and start patrolling again. 

Harry had forgotten his rings at her place, the ones he’d had her remove from his fingers using her mouth. She’d found them on the couch and inspected them closely before trying them on on her fingers and realizing they were too large and instead opted for a necklace, wearing them like pendentives. So she was sure to remember to give them back when he saw him first.

She loved his jewelry. Not usually a fan of men wearing rings but there was something about Harry that made them blend seamlessly into his character. She loved that each was so unique- but she hadn’t had a proper chance to inspect the others as closely as the two he’d left behind in her apartment. She brought them into her view as she sat at her desk and inspected them again for the umpteenth time. The inside of both bands had “Gucci” engraved so she knew they were quite valuable. One of them was a band featuring bears that appeared to be dancing. The other was an animal head, what appeared to be a wolf. She figured he must’ve been more into the forest and wildlife than she’d realized because those were quite the interesting choices for jewelry.

Karl came back from his patrol with Tom and sat at the desk, taking his ranger hat off and placing it on his knee, while his partner readied himself for night watch, brewing coffee in the break room, “Ready to get back out there, Y/N?”

“Am I ever… being cooped up here for the past 2 weeks has been torture.”

The older man chuckled, “I bet. But it was probably for the best.”

Y/N furrowed her brows, “Why, what do you mean?”

Karl sighed heavily, leaning back in his chair, “There’s been some interesting activity regarding wildlife. We’ve been seeing traces but today we’ve found evidence of some pretty brutal attacks, probably between two packs of wolves. Seems to have been quite the carnage.”

“Oh, my. Any carcasses?”

“No, but we’re pretty sure there were… victims, so to say. But, no, interestingly enough we couldn’t find any bodies. Who knows where they must’ve hidden to die off. Further into the forest for sure.”

Y/N couldn’t help but worry at the prospect of all these wolves potentially going at each other’s throats in proximity to Harry’s cabin. 

“... No human victims, though, right?”

Karl scrunched his face in amusement, “What would people be doing so deep into the forest? Nobody goes there, not even us rangers.”

“But what if someone were to wander off…”

“We would’ve heard if someone had gone missing while hiking. And people are usually mindful of the traced paths and all the off-limits warning signs. In all my time here we’ve had very few incidents.”

“Aside from the ranger I replaced.” Y/N swallowed the lump in her throat.

Her mind wandered to her predecessor. The man she replaced was brutally murdered, supposedly by a pack of wolves. There was no other explanation but there was an investigation because the police felt like there was something else at play. Forensics found nothing that pointed to human involvement, though. There hadn’t been such a violent attack in the woods before that they knew of. Certainly not with a forest ranger. Nick told her what had happened and how they found the man off the trail about a mile into the woods torn to shreds. Some of his parts were never recovered.

“Yeah. Frank, may God rest his soul. Poor fellow. Good partner, too.”

“He was your partner?”

“Yeah, back when we used to have assigned partners instead of rotating, we used to patrol together in the deeper parts. But he was just a bit too nosey. Especially about stuff like these…”

“What, you mean the wolves?”

Karl nodded absently, a faraway look on his face. “He was convinced something was amiss, that it was more than just wolves involved. He went snooping on his own… and that’s the last we saw him alive.”

Y/N's blood froze. That sounded a lot like what she’d done with the cabin and even how she’d gone about finding Harry and the pup in the first place. She could’ve easily been in Frank’s stead, and none the wiser. At least he’d told people about his concerns.

“What do you mean more than just wolves?”

“I’m not sure, to tell you the truth. Some of the things we came across were a bit too gore to have been just wolves.”

“Bears?”

“Considering we’ve hardly seen any, it’s very unlikely that there are so many hidden far away. Bears usually are pretty nosey. No, this all looked like wolf hyperactivity; who knows what goes on in their world, you know? What kind of feuds they’ve got going on that we don’t understand. They are pretty vicious creatures, especially amongst their own kind, so it’s not entirely surprising. But Frank was adamant there was more to it…”. Suddenly the man stood up, placing his hat back on his head, “I’m sure you’re very capable, Y/N. Make no mistake, I’m not undermining your capabilities. But Frank was a very experienced ranger, and he was careful, I’m certain of it. It just goes to show that you can’t go poking your nose where it doesn’t belong. Wild animals are not to be tempered with. They’re unpredictable, and this is their territory. So don’t be a hero. Alright? Stay safe out there.”

Y/N nodded as Karl took his leave for the day, gulping as she fidgeted with the rings on her necklace. She felt a very strong urge to call Harry and make sure he was okay. He did mention he’d have some business to take care of, so hopefully, that meant he wasn’t at the cabin while all of this was happening deep into the forest.

Unless said business involved the cabin, as she’d originally suspected.

“Y/N?” Karl popped his head back into the main office, “There’s a young man outside waiting for you?”

Y/N straightened in her chair abruptly and nearly fell off it in what would’ve been a very embarrassing story Karl would’ve probably lived to tell the rangers that joined in after her.

“Yeah. Be right out,” she tried to save face but she didn’t miss the older man's amused expression as he nodded his goodbye again.

She was done for the day too, she’d actually enjoyed her conversation with her colleague and got distracted. Otherwise, she’d been eyeing the clock like a hawk all day in anticipation of her two weeks of office work being officially over.

Trying to keep her cool, she tucked her necklace inside her shirt and gathered her belongings in her backpack, and walked out of the station after wishing Tom an easy night shift in the breakroom, and taking her sweet time in doing so too. She even threw in a giggle there, which probably threw her poor colleague off, but she felt petty enough to do it… and so she did. Harry seemingly had a way of coaxing the most unexpected reactions out of her.

The man in question was leaning against his original larger car, his arms crossed, and of course, sporting that seemingly perpetual scowl that she found so attractive. She bit the inside of her cheek to steady herself and approached him. As she was getting closer, Harry’s expression morphed from neutral if slightly irritated because of aforementioned scowl, to confused verging on… worried.

“What’s the matter?” he asked before she even reached him.

She furrowed her brows, “What do you mean? What?” she touched at her face in reflex “Do I have something on my face?...”

He reached out and grabbed her shoulders, looking her over intently, “Are you hurt?”

“...No? Why?”

Harry was certain she was deeply wounded. There was no way she’d hurt herself by accident and couldn’t feel it with the amount of blood he was smelling on her. 

“Are you sure?”

She laughed, “Yes, I’m sure. What’s gotten into you? My ankle is good as new! See?” she wiggled her foot for show.

Harry was thrown off by this. She seemed fine. She didn’t appear to be lying- he could always tell when people were lying- their not-so-subtle cues paired with the rush in their blood flow always gave them away- but she was being truthful, she wasn’t hurt or at least wasn’t aware of it. Giving her another once-over he decided to take her word for it and drop it- although something was definitely off. 

Was there someone else’s blood on her somehow? But he was familiarized with her own blood’s scent from when he’d cleaned her wounds at the cabin–

“Harry?” The man’s eyes snapped back at hers, “Are you alright?”

“Yeah. Yeah– sorry. Uhm. Right.” he blinked, re-focusing, “Let’s get moving, want you to catch more daylight than last time.”

‘Huh?”

“The lake. Thought we’d go for a swim again,” he opened the passenger door and held it open for her as per usual.

Y/N stalled, hesitating, “Uhm. Yeah… I can’t, though.”

Harry frowned, “Why? Did you go already?” Without me, he wanted to add but refrained.

“No, I, uh… well. We can still go but I can’t get into the water.”

“It’s still warm outside and I promise I’ll get you out before the sun sets this time around. And I’ll think of other ways to warm you up more efficiently,” he added with a smirk, roaming his eyes over her body once more, but this time for a different purpose.

Y/N raised an eyebrow and fought off a smile, “That’s awfully considerate of you, however… it’s not that. I, uh… well, I’m on my period,” she shrugged, defeatedly. There was no other way to put it.

Harry paused, staring at her for a long moment. That notion had completely gone right over his head. He knew, of course, that human females bled monthly, unlike his own kind, that inherited the canine characteristics in this regard and only went into heat once a year.

His eyes widened, realizing that must’ve meant that Y/N was essentially in heat.

And that triggered something within him. Something he’d just given himself a pep talk over. But how could he possibly stick to the plan in her presence now knowing she was, well… breedable?

Harry used all of his concentrated willpower to keep his eyes from brightening at the realization. 

“I’m sorry if that was TMI…” Y/N grimaced when he just stared at her. She’d never seen him taken aback like that. Had she grossed him out?

“Of course not,” he furrowed his brows even deeper. “Don’t be silly. What, uh… what do you normally do?”

“What, like, when I’m on my period?” she laughed “Are you sure you’re alright?”

“What’s wrong with my question?”

Y/N stammered, “Nothing, it’s just… I mean, I don’t know. I usually just stay in, eat comfort food, fight off cramps cuddled up on my couch, and watch romcoms.”

Cramps. So there was a level of discomfort there, then, “Are you in pain?”

Y/N tried not to laugh again, he seemed genuinely interested in knowing for some reason. Had none of his girlfriends had their periods around him? Or had he just never had a relationship long enough to have to deal with this? Or did he just never have relationships at all? “Uhm, not right now. It’s usually worse during the night, I guess…”

“Do you take medication for the pain?”

“Rarely. If it gets unbearable.”

Unbearable.

“But usually I can ride it out, I just, you know… place a warm water bottle on my belly or something.” she couldn’t resist covering her face, “Gosh, this is embarrassing.”

Harry gently removed her hands from her face, “Why is it embarrassing? I just want to know, so I can help.”

“... You want to help?”

Harry bit his lower lip. This was verging on dangerous territory. “Yes. Is that so wrong?”

Y/N blushed, remembering the instance in which she’d used that exact same phrase after their date. “No. No, it’s not.” She smiled, “You could come over if you want? Distract me?”

Harry was beyond confused. He’d never heard of the females in his pack being in pain during their heat. Well, maybe only if they couldn’t get someone to breed them– Was this why Y/N was hurting, then? Because there wasn’t anyone to breed her? Sure, Niall had told him impregnating her was physically impossible but the act itself was surely enough to comfort her. 

It all made sense. The way he could distract her from her pain was to fuck it out of her. She was in heat and needed to be bred. 

He knew from his own experience during his rut, the agony was almost unbearable. He needed to release around the clock to keep sane. It must’ve been the same for her. Poor thing.

Only- he wasn’t smelling her arousal. Which didn’t make any sense. Maybe her blood was overpowering it… Yes, that must’ve been it.

Harry had really wanted to give this whole human ritual angle a go, for her sake- but refraining from soothing his ma– little human was something he couldn’t even fathom.

“I’ll distract you.”

*

First things first- Y/N mentioned comfort food. He’d take it a step at a time. Harry was quite the enthusiast when it came to cooking, and what better time to etalate his talents in the kitchen than now that his services were needed the most. He drove them to her place, then dropped her off and when she turned to look at him confused as to why he wasn’t getting out of the car, he reassured her “Just gonna grab a few things and be right back, alright kitten?” 

He didn’t miss the small smile that played on her lips as she nodded and headed towards her apartment building. He waited for her to get in safely then drove off to the nearest supermarket. While he was going through the aisles, he dialed Niall’s number. Just to be on the safe side.

“Uhm- I’m kind of in the middle of something–”

“Then step to the side. What can you tell me about human menstruation?”

He could hear his friend rub his face in frustration and a bit of shuffling around before closing a door behind him with a sigh “What about it?”

“How does it work? Is it like when our females go into heat?”

“Yes and no. Ours only do it once a year, they go through this every month. Doesn’t last as long though, a few days, varying on individual aspects.”

“Is it painful?”

“Yeah, it can be quite painful.”

“Would you say it was unbearable?”

“I dunno Harry- last time I checked I wasn’t a woman.”

“Does sex help?”

Niall paused “It can help- but what’s this about exactly? Is Y/N on her period?”

Harry growled lowly “That’s none of your business.”

“Sheesh. You can fuck her if she wants, might help with the pain even- there’s no contraindications.”

“But isn’t it… preferable? You know, the same way females in heat need to be bred?”

“Hold on. Wait. Yeah- here’s the catch. The main difference is that while our kind are most fertile during their heat and need to be bred- humans are least fertile during their period. They have no urge to procreate during menstruation. That occurs for them during ovulation.”

“... What happens during ovulation?”

“Basically, it’s like they’re in heat minus the bleeding. That’s when they’re at their horniest.”

“And does that occur monthly too?”

“Yes, roughly 10 days before menstruating.”

Harry immediately thought about their encounter at the lake and the way she’d smelled a lot more potent and alluring to him. And judging by Niall’s calculations, she must’ve been ovulating then. Which explained her eagerness and boldness. He felt a pang of guilt for taking her home without comforting her in any way.

“You still there mate?”

“Yeah– ok. Ok, that checks out. So sex isn’t necessarily something that would help right now?”

“I’d leave that for later, maybe. Humans are weird about these things.”

Harry recalled how she’d mentioned it was embarrassing and figured Niall was probably right. He was going to shelve this for a later time, then. He had a feeling his little human would benefit from this special treatment. He thanked his friend for the info and let him go back to whatever he was doing that he was eager to get back to, and focused on his shopping. If sex was off the table for now he was going to spoil her in other ways, and he had a good idea about what else might make her feel better.

*

Harry was walking back through Y/N’s door much sooner than she’d anticipated. She had just started getting into an episode of a new show when Harry was opening her door that she’d left unlocked. She turned quickly to watch him with his arms full. In one arm a paper bag full of groceries and in his other, Eddie.

Y/N hopped up from her spot when she saw them and beamed, “You brought my favorite little guy! Look at you!” She took the pup from Harry’s arm and placed him down on the floor, squatting down next to him to pat his head.

“Thought you’d like seeing him. And I got some groceries so I can make us dinner. Now,” he gestured at the girl, “go put your feet up on the couch. Edward can lie with you while I make food.”

Harry wasn’t sure exactly why he was feeling so protective of her. Well, he kind of knew but this sudden need to care for her and soothe her was unusual. He’d never jumped into action in this way before. But then again, everything with Y/N was all new to him. He was fighting his natural urges while also trying to balance them with what she might expect from a boyfriend. Was that what they were? 

Harry had been doing more independent research about what it was like to date and what women expected. They liked to take things slow, but they also didn’t like to be kept waiting for some kind of commitment (which didn’t make any sense to Harry). Dating wasn’t an explicit commitment and sometimes humans would date multiple people at once. Another thing that boggled his mind. If Harry ever found out that she was dating anyone else he’d lose it. He didn’t think he’d be able to hide his inclination to harm the other man. So he wanted to figure out a way to make it clear to her that she was his. Only, he wouldn’t say it like that to her in case that sort of thinking scared her off. Humans were funny about being their own person and possessive behavior was typically frowned upon by them. 

Before he headed into the kitchen, Harry picked up Edward and placed him over her tummy. Y/N immediately started petting him- he was a bit sleepy as it was later into the evening and past his bedtime which was perfect for what she needed right now. Soon, he closed his eyes and started purring, which Harry figured would help soothe her cramps and was essentially what made him go get his nephew in the first place, aside from the fact he knew she’d enjoy seeing him again.

Harry tried to ignore his jealousy over that bit. He really wanted to just lie there with her on the couch and warm her with his hand to soothe her. But he pushed down those thoughts. He planned on doing just that after they ate dinner. 

It didn’t take long for Harry to make the truffle macaroni and cheese dish. Normally, he would use fresh truffles but he didn’t find any at the supermarket he’d been to and an employee there assured him he wouldn’t find any outside specific markets- so he’d had to settle for truffle oil and hoped it’d taste just as good. Thankfully their cheese selection was good, so he was able to use his favorites for the dish; Gruyere, fontina, and fresh parmesan to balance the flavors.

After he plated their food, he handed her a bowl and placed another down on the floor for Edward, only his bowl consisted of a mix of vegetables and meat, to his disappointment- his nephew was not pleased by this. Harry was still trying to keep up the facade about Edward being a pup so feeding him truffle mac and cheese would be confusing to a human. He was lucky Harry wasn’t feeding him dog food.

“Harry! Oh my god!” Y/N spoke as she held her hand in front of her mouth full of pasta, “This is so fucking good!” Harry smiled to himself. He knew it was good. He knew she’d like it.

Y/N was feeling absolutely pampered. He washed the dishes and gave her a pint of chocolate fudge ice cream to eat while he cleaned. But she kind of hoped he’d settle down and just lie with her or at least sit. He’d barely relaxed since he’d come back with the groceries and Eddie other than to eat with her.

“Harry?” Y/N sat up and looked toward the kitchen. She blinked her eyes at the sight of him in there cleaning her countertop and working in it like it was his own kitchen. And he had put his hair into a bun. It was oddly attractive. She’d never dated a guy with long hair. It always felt so feminine on most men. But Harry was an exception to that. He was masculine and took up a lot of space so his soft curls made sense on him somehow. He was equally pretty and handsome.

He turned to look at her when he heard her call his name and raised his brows in question.

“Will you please sit down with me for a bit? Eddie is nice company but I was hoping to have yours as well.”

Harry grinned, dimples carving into his cheeks, “I’ll be right there.”

She wanted him there with her. He would certainly make that happen. After putting the pot away that he’d just dried, Harry picked Edward up and placed him on a pillow next to the couch, and sat down. But Y/N pulled at him so he was right next to her. She was grateful for his attention and thoughtfulness. But she wanted him. Wanted to kiss him and have him hold her. 

“Such a needy little thing, Y/N,” Harry laughed at her grabby hands.

“Sometimes.” 

“What do you need right now, hm?”

Y/N smiled and bit her lip. She was never one to be shy about what she wanted, but Harry brought something else out of her. Made her feel tingly and bright all over the way he looked at her. The way he always seemed to look like he wanted to devour her. She wanted to devour him too, though.

Instead of speaking an answer, Y/N let her eyes travel to his mouth and then back up to his eyes as she licked her lips.

Harry was an expert at reading body language. He had to be because, in his wolf form, he was unable to speak so when he and his pack would need to communicate in their shifted form they relied heavily on body language. And he knew what she wanted by her simple gesture. She didn’t need to speak for him to understand her.

Moving his hand to her hip and pulling her into his arms, Harry put his nose against her neck, “Want me to hold you?” He kissed her soft skin and the way her heart was pumping rapidly against her pulse point was not missed by him. 

She let out a shaky breath and he felt her nod. He placed another soft peck against her neck before bringing his lips up to her mouth in a kiss that had Y/N completely melting. She brought her small hand up to his jaw and opened her mouth for him as he deepened the kiss before parting with a gasp. He had to take it easy. 

Harry moved them around, lying on his back with Y/N lying atop his chest. He moved his hands down and wrapped his arms around her. He hoped this counted as a third date. He wanted to do more than just hold her next time. He could tell she’d probably enjoy more than just being held even this time. To him, she definitely acted just as though she were in heat. And Niall did say it might help her if that’s what she wanted…

He didn’t have to imagine how she was feeling. He could already smell it on her. Taste it. She wanted him in the same way he wanted her. Harry’s willpower to resist was wearing thin. Especially when he could sense her aroused state.

Y/N lifted her head to look at Harry and she brought her hand up to his face and gently ghosted her fingers at his jaw, “I like you, Harry.”

Harry grinned widely and squeezed her tight, “Oh yeah? Kind of figured…” 

Y/N laughed and scooted herself upward and pressed her mouth over his. Harry loved how bold she could be at times. And he loved how she tasted. Her smooth lips against his felt so good he felt like he could lose his mind.

But that didn’t compare to the way it felt when she lowered her mouth to his jaw and then began sponging hot kisses against his neck. Harry moaned and closed his eyes as she licked and kissed his pulse point. However, it was the sudden nip and suck at his flesh that had him feeling the rush of heat that made him solid between his legs in an instant. 

“Oh… you like that…” she smiled into his neck as she repeated her gesture again.

Harry kept his eyes closed and lips parted, allowing her to mark him like she wanted. But he was slowly fading into his crude nature. Too much more of this and he’d just have to fuck her. This was the kind of thing an alpha would only allow a mate to do. 

When Y/N adjusted her position and opened her legs to straddle Harry he held her hips down to keep her from wiggling over his thickened cock too much. He needed to slow this moment down. He was here to comfort her and make her feel better but he was losing composure quickly and he needed to stop before he did anything too hasty. 

“Let’s just lie here and relax, c’mere…” Harry pulled her down so her head was lying on his chest. He couldn’t have her seeing his eyes. He was struggling to control himself.

Y/N whined and pouted which made Harry chuckle, “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing. You’re right. I’m on my period so I doubt you want to do anything with that…”

Harry gripped her hip tight and with his free hand he smoothed his thumb over her cheek, “Oh, Y/N. You couldn’t be more wrong. You have no idea the things I would do to you. Your period isn’t what is stopping me.” On the contrary.

Y/N drew her pointer finger in circles over his chest, “What’s stopping you then?”

Harry drew in a deep breath and continued brushing his finger on her cheek, “I just want to do this right,” he responded honestly, “there’s something here, don’t you think?”

Y/N tilted her head back to look up at him. There was something. She did know. He was right and she was thankful for his good sense. 

A few moments went by with Y/N looking up at Harry dreamily. His eyes had been closed the whole time.

Harry smiled and then finally allowed himself to open his eyes to look down at her just to find her smiling back. He noticed a necklace dangling from her delectable neck, the chain tucked under her shirt. And when Y/N saw his eyes lower to her neck she remembered his rings.

She pushed herself up and pulled the chain out to reveal the rings Harry had her remove the other night.

The smile fell from Harry’s face when he realized what she had on the chain. His rings. Another gesture that she didn’t realize the implications of. She was wearing his rings like a prize around her neck, a signal to others that she was spoken for. Of course, that wasn’t her intention but to Harry, it felt like a subconscious act that meant much more than she knew.

“I almost forgot I was wearing it,” Y/n placed the rings in her palm, still attached to the chain.

Harry tilted his head to the side, taking the sight in. He was once again taken aback by her natural instinct. First, the way she’d worn his shirt to bed, then the way she’d nipped at his neck just earlier, and now this. These were all things a mate would do, and she was doing them without a second thought. She just knew. When she went to undo the chain at the back of her neck he stopped her, “Looks too good on you to take off right now. Keep it on.”

When Y/N reluctantly pulled her body out of his arms to go for a bathroom break, he noted how Edward was fast asleep on the pillow and figured he should probably get his little human to bed as well. He walked into her bedroom and smiled to himself when the first thing he saw was his shirt discarded on her bed. She was still wearing it to sleep, then. Her room was as messy as ever, but for some reason, he found it endearing instead of being put off. He was quite the neat freak himself.

When she emerged from the bathroom she saw him in her room directly across the small hallway and smiled to herself, remembering the way she’d found him snooping in there the first time. 

He beckoned for her to step inside, “Let’s get you to bed, kitten.” She couldn’t help the wide smile at his use of that pet name he seemed to prefer for her. She then noticed him holding his shirt, “Are you wearing this to sleep?”

She blushed, realizing she’d been caught yet again for using it rather than having washed it to return it to him. Truth was, she didn’t want to give it back. But his cologne was starting to wear off and she secretly wished she could ask for another in exchange. Would that be too forward? “...Yes.”

“Then by all means…” he held it out to her and she hesitated. Did he want her to strip down and put his shirt on instead? When he raised an eyebrow at her expectedly, she bit her lower lip and discarded her top. She normally just wore his shirt and a pair of panties to bed. And he seemed to know that with the way he was looking at her. So she unhooked her bra next and tossed it to the floor. 

Harry’s nose flared, reigning himself in as he watched her undress in front of him in the soft light her bedside lamp provided. He allowed his eyes to linger longer than before on her alluring body. His eyes landed on his rings dangling right in between her breasts and swallowed the lump in his throat. Wetting his lips, he closed in the space between them and made a conscious effort to keep his eyes on hers, draping the shirt over her shoulders, much in the same way he’d done back at the lake when he first gave it to her. 

Never removing her eyes from his, she slid her arms into the sleeves easily with how loose it fit over her body, while he buttoned the shirt up for her. She then undid her pants and slid them off, leaving them in a heap on the floor.

Harry was reminded of her state of distress when the sweet rusted iron scent of blood hit him full force now that she was just wearing her panties under the oversized shirt. It was what snapped him out of it and reminded him he’d meant to put her to bed.

Taking initiative and crawling under the covers, Y/N watched as he pondered his next move. She scooted toward the middle of the bed, making sure to leave him plenty of space to follow suit, should he want to. She hoped he’d stay a little longer. Maybe even sleep over. Would he want that?  Was it something he’d want to do, just cuddle? 

She watched as he eventually took his shirt off, unbuttoning it slowly. She made a mental note to somehow trick him into leaving it behind in exchange for the one she was wearing. Harry then reached for his button to remove his pants and halted, looking up at Y/N, “Is this okay?”

Y/N nodded and gave him a soft smile, knowing full well he went commando. And sure enough, he pulled his jeans down his legs, leaving once again no underwear in sight. She didn’t miss the fact that he sported a semi, but looked away as to preserve the tenderness of the moment. He climbed onto the bed next to her and pulled the blanket over himself before pulling her into his arms again, her face pressed into his left pec.

Harry felt his heart calming and his body with it. He looked down at the girl who had her eyes closed. He brushed his hand against her jaw and his deep voice vibrated against her ear, “Tell me about that picture you have hanging above your dresser. The one where you’re wearing a military uniform.”

Y/N opened her eyes and angled her head to look up at him, moving her palm upward to his chest, before turning to look over at the photo Harry was referring to.

She sighed with a smile and laid her head back down on his chest as she began to tell him about the photo. Her family in it. Her time at military school and her training, “My brother was also in the military. Now he’s running a small business in the town he lives in with his wife. She’s pregnant. I’ll be an aunty soon,” she smiled at the thought.

“When was the last time you saw him?” 

“A couple of months ago. He lives a few hours away so it’s not so easy to just hop on over these days.”

Harry was momentarily lost in thought again as he absentmindedly twirled a strand of her hair between his fingers. He wished he could hop in a car and go see his brother, if only for a minute. He’d know what to tell him, about the growingly inevitable decision he’d have to face soon.

“What about you? Your family?” 

“Mmm…” Harry couldn’t tell her the full truth, but he could give her pieces, “My parents died when I was young. My uncle took care of me, then when I came of age I moved in with my older brother.”

Y/N craned her neck to look at Harry in the eyes, “I’m sorry, Harry. Are you close with your brother?”

“Mmh-” Harry grunted in response. He swallowed thickly and blinked his eyes. He wasn’t quite ready to talk about his brother.

Y/N realized that this might mean he didn’t want to talk about it. She laid her head back onto his chest and brushed her fingertips over his butterfly tattoo and higher, feeling his sparse hairs under her palm. She wanted to ask about his tattoos too. Maybe that would’ve been a safer route to getting to know more about him. Soon, his breathing became more shallow and she was sure he had fallen asleep.

But Harry was far from asleep. They laid in silence for a long while as he considered her question and as much as he didn’t want to talk about his brother, he decided that, for her, he would talk about it. Well, what he could anyway.

“He and his wife recently passed.”

Y/N lifted her head to look up at him. She hadn’t expected that. She listened intently as he continued. “It was a bad accident. Uh… and Edward was their… pet, actually, and so I took him in.”

Y/N pushed her arms around Harry’s frame and squeezed him, smushing her cheek to his chest, “Oh, Harry… that’s awful. I’m so sorry. Eddie is lucky that you took him in. If you want to talk about it… how it happened, I’ll listen.”

Harry sighed and closed his eyes. She was sweet. He felt like he could trust her completely and it took everything in him not to tell her more. But he couldn’t risk that. In that moment, he only wanted to do whatever it took to protect their growing bond.

“Maybe another day.”

Y/N nodded into his chest and closed her eyes. Harry’s natural scent was calming and her cramps were soothed. She was so pleased that Harry had shared with her what he did. It meant he trusted her. That felt important. And it meant more to her than he knew that she finally got to know something personal about him. Especially something so vulnerable. She felt content.

Harry could tell she was beginning to doze off. Her heart rate was slowing and her breaths were lighter even. He gently began to adjust her in his arms so she’d be more comfortable.

Y/N drowsily felt him turn her to her side and, fearing he’d then pull away and leave she asked in a small voice “Will you stay the whole night with me?”

It was then that it dawned on him that he’d be spending the night, sleeping next to her. He’d never done that with anyone else before. He would’ve thought it would feel unnatural to be laying in bed with her- him naked and with her bleeding as if in heat, no less- and not engage in anything sexual, but, somehow, it didn’t. It felt right. And he felt content just to be in her presence, holding her to his body. He reached to turn off the bedside lamp and then brought his arms around her, placing a big warm palm over her belly, wishing he could allow himself to purr to soothe her even more. “Of course,” he spoke into her neck as he closed his eyes. He never wanted to leave her side again.

Chapter 7

A/N: (@fkinavocado and @gurugirl here) 20k words - enough said.

please remember to like & reblog if you enjoyed this, and most importantly, come share your thoughts on it with us here 💌

if you feel so inclined, you can buy us a coffee here☕

🐺follow us on wattpad to get notified whenever we post something new/update!🐺

[cookie-crumblr]

The Smell of Smoke

Innocent F! Reader x M!Yandere Bully OC

Part 6~

His Info: 🖕✨

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7

MINORS DNI

CW: Fem! Reader, reader has a vagina, reader referred to as she/her, loud “noises”, bullying against reader, explicit language, asphyxiation, fight, blood, extreme violence against reader, hospital setting, coma-d reader,, medication use, non con kissing and touching,

Yesterday feels like a dream, but your throbbing head at least proves the alcohol part…

But what about him being … Nice-ish… to you.

Nice for him definitely.

Nice for you, eh, not so much. no more like not at all.

It’s still weird though.

You don’t understand him in the slightest.

Gods, your leg and head are in agony, like you’re in a crocodile’s mouth and she’s giving you the famously terrible roll of death.

You clamber over to your meds, but they aren’t in your bag. At first you’re confused but when you turn around, your bleary eyes land on an open bottle of beer and your med bottle… Did he try to do something “nice” for you, again?

“What the fuck…” Your lip’s upturned as you groan.

Uhg just get them in you already.

An Hour Later~

You make it to class without a hitch! you feel like for the first time in a week you can breathe, at least a little, though labored, it still feels amazing!

Ezra isn’t in class today, another sigh of relief escapes you.

You’re taking notes diligently today, it’s actually so relaxing, you had no idea something so boring and mundane could be so therapeutic.

It’s a good day without him.

Outside the sun feels so wonderful on your face you forget about your broken and branded leg. It feels like the sun’s giving you a nice warm embrace, keeping you safe from all the horrors you’ve experienced now.

You find a stall vending your favorite foods and go to buy some, and a stranger pays for your food!

It’s such a good day without him.

The Next Day~

*SLAM, BANG!*

“SURPRISE! ‘M Y’R NEW ROOMIE~”

You jump as your door flies off its hinges, and Ezra announces his presence loudly and ridiculously.

Come on, of course you cant have more than a gods damn day to yourself.

He starts throwing your roommates shit all over the room, “the fuck are you doing!?” You yell at him without thinking.

“What’d you say, bitch!?” He immediately faces you, and throws down whatever was in his hands in front of you, causing you to yelp and flinch.

“I-I didn’t—”

“Y-You what? didn’t mean it? It’s too fuckin’ late for you, slut.” He’s already on you, hand wrapped around your throat.

You cough without any air, it’s painful to even try.

Your crutches are next to you on your bed…

You reach and stretch over—

You manage to grab one, it’s a little awkward to wield and swing, but you fucking hit him!

He’s surprised and let’s go of you, a wild smile pulls at his lips.

Oh gods!!

You Bolt.

By the time you’re out of the door, your bad legs make you stumble, then in a second he’s tackling you to the ground.

He punches the back of you then grabs you by the back of your head and smashes your face into the ground.

There’s a ringing in your ears, and blood starts pouring from your nose like a geyser.

“Ezra! Stop!!” Ace’s muffled, worry filled voice rings out from down the hall.

“Stay outta it Ace!” Ezra’s voice is equally as hard to hear, even though he’s yards closer.

“No! Quit it!!! Y/N didn’t do anything to you!”

He throws you forward. You have absolutely no fight. You lie shaking and in complete shock, frozen as of time is ice around you.

“Y/N, You oka— no of course not,,” he rushes over to you.

“Ezra… why…” Ace didn’t ask it, he just sounds so disappointed in his brother.

“Yeah, yeah” Ezra doesn’t look at Ace as he walks past him.

“Easy up there, Y/N,” Ace helps you up and slips your arm around his neck. He’s shorter than Ezra so it’s a little easier to walk with him helping you.

“Fuck, I’m sorry… I’m so… Sorry,” he whispers seemingly to himself.

Your ears are still ringing and your head is in more agony than you’ve ever felt up there, you aren’t sure you can stay upright even with Ace’s help.

“woah there! here,” He lifts you into his solid arms and makes sure your tight against his chest.

You try to stay awake but find that a feeling deeper than even the promise of the deepest sleep is pulling you under fast.

“Hey, w-wait, i think you’re s’posed to stay awake with head injuries!” He panics, and speeds up to his car, but stops and calls for an ambulance.

Shit, you’re gonna have a massive bill. Your head is… in unthinkable agony. Is it gonna explode!?

You black out, and come to a few times, one second your in Ace’s arms, the next you’re in a fire truck? next your in a gurney, and then a hospital.

“Y/N!?” Its Ace that’s there next to you when you wake up, but you see a familiar strawberry blonde standing almost outside of your line of sight. He’s wearing a deep scowl. “Y/N! Y/N! You’re awake!”

“You… Were in a coma… For a week.” Ezra doesn’t look at you as he gets the words out.

“A WEEK!? This time you put me in a coma for a week, and you can’t even look at me, you’re despicable. Why are you even here!?” You grab your head as it pounds.

His fiery gaze meets yours head on and you aren’t backing down. What’s he gonna do? put you in another coma??

For fucks sake.

His expression changes, something akin to lust maybe? It’s always confusing you and giving you whiplash, nothing is ever how you expect with this guy.

“Ace, can you give us a minute?” he asks.

“No can do.” He crosses his arms and shakes his head, steadfast, and not going to leave your side.

“It’s alright, i think he’s made whatever point he wanted to make for now.” You resist rolling your eyes at Ezra, thinking back to just … Well you guess a week ago now. It feels like it just happened a second ago to you. Uhg, your head.

He takes a minutes long pause before deciding and finally standing. “okay… But… yell if you need help.” He’s torn, but you want to hear what Ezra has to say, if anything, or if he’s just gonna jump you again, at least you’re already in a hospital bed…

Oh fuck! it’s just hit you… A Weeks worth of medical bills!? FUCK.

“Y/N—” He starts, but…

“Nope, wait, let me go first. What the hell do you want from me!? Just take it and get it over with already! just look at me! are you done yet? happy?? satisfied??”

“I’m not happy.” He looks out the window at a tree. “‘sides, to be honest, thought youd ‘ave a thicker skull than that,” he snickers.

“Oh fuck off.” You’ve never been so angry before in your life. You’ve also never felt so powerless. Maybe because you have nothing left to loose you feel more unhinged and ready to fight.

“I’m sorry.” he says flatly.

“Did you just..?” NOTHING can redeem him, and he just thinks— or maybe he’s not even thinking! does he have a brain to think?

He crosses the room.

Leaning over you in your bed, he grabs your face to pull it up right in front of his own.

You meet his challenge and stare deeply back into his dark red-brown eyes.

He looks down at your puffed lips and back up.

Soon he’s grabbing you all over your upper half, chest waist, belly, throat, he messes up your gown and when it’s loose around your shoulder he bites you there.

His teeth sink into your flesh, you’re biting your lip and trying to shove him off but you have no strength.

Your head lolls back wards, and as youre about to start counting the dots in the ceiling, he backs off.

“Fuck this, ‘m goin’ out f’r a smoke,” he tosses your head back down to your body and back onto the hospital bed.

Ace steps in right after him, before the door closes, “You alright?”

“Yeah, thank you, Ace… I think i need more meds tho hah” you try and laugh but your head pounds.

“Here!” He pushes the button for you and tells the nurse what’s wrong. he listens to Ace for a second then comes to you to confirm and once you do he gives you more morphine.

Then, your whole body just melts.

Woo goodness does that feel nice. You drift back into sleep happily, forgetting everything, along with the pain just for a second.

Yet…

Both dreams end the same…

[frozen-snowflakesandsunflowers]

Frozen Fever: Elsa's flower mystery: Part 2

I've been thinking about what Elsa's flower is called ever since the short came out. But I never came round to a conclusion nor did I break it down. In part 1, I started seeing the possibilities of six petals pink flowers such as stargazer lilies and river lilies etc. but although they are similar, they're not quite exact or as close to the flower we see Elsa use on her attire. But now I'm going to narrow it down further by looking at flowers in Norway. Sunflowers are in Norway too so Elsa's flower must also be in Norway too and it's the summer so these flowers of Elsa's must also grow in the spring and summer.

Here's a reminder of what Elsa's flowers look like in the vase before she puts them on her attire:

So I've searched up pink flowers in Norway and none of the flowers I've seen look even the slightest closest to Elsa's one. So now then I start looking for red flowers because these flowers look closer to red than purple. But then again nothing.

But taking something away from my research in part 1, the results were mostly of different kinds of Lilies. So that gets me digging for lilies in Norway and then I find this:

Red Asiatic lily.

This lily is red but also comes in pink as shown on the right. Below the flower multiple leaves spiral around it that look like flowers. But it doesn't look close to it.

The flowers we see in Frozen Fever are actually smaller and have slightly straight petals and a small center in the middle. And also though they are small some can be tiny.

So then I do a much smarter thing which I should've done in the first place lol. I do a visual search. I go on Google photos and click the lens which puts the image in the Google search bar in images and finds images that are close to the photo. The results are as below:

Soiree Kawaii aka Vinca (Catharanthus)

It's possible that the flowers shown in the short didn't actually have 6 petals but 5. The leaves too also make a similar flower shape though they're bigger than the flowers. The only other difference is that these flowers don't have printed tips but rather rounded ones and I don't think they grow in Norway.

Ceratopatalum gummiferum Albery’s red

These flowers also have 5 petals and are 'red' and have 3 pointed leaves rather than 6 like Elsa's but they do match closely with Elsa's flower. In fact it's the closest result I've seen yet. This too doesn't seem to grow in Norway.

Christmas Cactus

Though the flowers look close, the leaves are definitely not it.

Azalea starstyle pink

These are close but not quite there. The pink petals are much more than 6. Though they're quite cute and pink it's not the one.

So in conclusion, hehe I don't know what the flower is exactly. There are some 6 petal pink/ red flowers but they don't match up exactly or as close and not do the 5 petal ones. Some are close and some are not so. If there ever is an opportunity to ask a question to any of the Frozen team, I'll definitely ask this question to put a lid on this full filling jar of mystery. If you guys have other alternatives to what Elsa's flower is please do let me know. All I can conclude is that it's most likely a type of lily.. unless all lilies are big in which case then, I have no idea what it could be.

Sorry for the disappointment but at least we got some options to what it could be. We did get somewhere. But I think for now this is to be put on pause until we get closer to the actual flower. Tangled's flower looks identical to a stargazer lily so I'm certain Elsa's flower isn't that. For now I'll put this topic to rest unless I come closer to finding out what to do and I'll make a part 3 which will be linked here.

[arcielee]

Dancing in the Dark

Tom Bennett x OFC Summary: War is spilling over Europe and a route is being created to help POWs escape occupied France. Sometimes love does not last forever, but lasts long enough. Warnings: Smut/NSFW later on, some misogyny cause it’s the 1940s Author’s Note: The elongated back-and-forth German is in italics because I do not to wish to disappoint my oma more than I already do. ♥ Enjoy!

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6 - ende

Chapter 2

The follow shifts extended into the night and the workload now required to keep the hospital functioning seemed ceaseless. The worst was the fear and agitation every patient held in their demeanor and their eyes, the palpable fear that the Gestapo would arrive at any moment and take them away, not to be seen or heard from again. 

The nursing staff did their best for comfort and even Vera used the last of her lipstick to pinken her lips when she offered a sweet smile, but it did not fool anyone. The only one who did not seem deterred and could offer her the slightest reprieve in her rounds was when she stopped at Bennett’s bed. 

She found him aggravating, with his nicknames for her and his snide comments. He seemed to enjoy prodding to get a rise from her and her temper outlet was a sharp look and sharper tongue, but even with their back-and-forth could not help her forget the new reality of the German administration settling into France. Vera knew her time in Paris was nearing its end; she had a fear overhead of the fabricated identity that Nancy provided her to slip away from Berlin two years prior that was now a detriment to her freedom. 

She confessed her concern with the doctor and Henriette; the nurse, in turn, also confessed that she was Jewish and her burden of fear that she now carried with her every shift.

The doctor listened to them with a somber expression on his face, learning two of his nurses stayed afloat in Paris with forged papers. “I promise I will think of something,” was all he said to them, his smile not as bright as before. “Just try and act as if everything is fine.” 

Henriette nodded, but her dark eyes were fearful, and Vera chewed her bottom lip, her eyes glancing over the doctor and landed on his desk. She spotted a télégramme with the words type, “Major Sieber arrivera le 28 Juin.” 

The Germans would be in by the end of the week. 

She continued her shifts, as Dr. O’Connor asked, acting as though everything was fine. She grabbed her tin basin, stopping at a mirror glass to look over her features; her dark curls were braided back and already spilling to frame her face, and she paused to use her free hand to pinch her cheeks for a flushed look. She had no lip blush left, but still kept her feign smile posted with every bed visit until she came to Bennett’s bed. 

He was on the mend, with the bruising on his shoulder fading away to muted purples and greens. The gash on the left side of his face had scabbed over and now showed the soft pink of scarring that, she begrudgingly admitted to herself, added to his almost roguish handsomeness. 

He laid back in the bed, his arms tucked behind his head, waiting. “Guten Tag, Fräulein.” He said, his perpetual smirk playing on his lips. 

Her green eyes narrowed on him in return. “Stop that, Bennett,” she hissed. “I do not wish to frighten my patients any more than they already are.” 

“I cannot imagine anyone being fearful of you, Mein lieber kraut,” his lips curled with his words. My little kraut. 

She scoffed at the nickname. “Stop that.”

“Is the feeling not returned? Here I lay, pining all day for our moments together-” “Sit up, Bennett,” Vera said as she sat on the bed edge, the bin on her lap. 

He pushed himself upright, his eyes focused to watch her hands flit over the supplies, trying to ignore how close he was. She found him both aggravating and charming, finding herself to feel a slight excitement when she came to his bed. Here, she was able to take a moment and chat with him. He shared about his life in Manchester with his sister and dad, before he had enlisted, and he would pry for details about Vera, determined to understand her and what passions she held outside the hospital.  

“I enjoy reading,” she shared one day. 

“Reading what?”

Her brow quirked to his question. “Anything.”

“Everything?” He pressed, his own brow raised in response.

“I like…” she hesitated. “I prefer fiction at this time. It is something that allows me to escape.” 

He pursed his lips, his head bobbed in agreement. “I can understand that,” his expression was playful once again. “Will you read to me?”

“Can you not read?” His laugh was short, then he realized she was serious. “Christ, I’m not some ill-educated Manc who enlisted out of desperation–” 

“You did enlist out of desperation,” she replied with a smirk. “And I apologize for assuming you were illiterate. I just thought…”

“You thought wrong,” he cut in. “Maybe I just enjoy hearing your voice.” 

She did not respond. With every passing day, his recovery now brought on an imperious audacity that she was unsure how to handle, finding him to be aggravatingly cocksure and flirtatious. Her tight-knit composure would crack, her frustration spill for a moment, and she would see his lips curl into his puerile grin and he would ask, “But you still like me, right?” 

Vera would refuse to reply, but he noted the flush to her cheeks and would decide to drop it. 

Today, he sat obedient as she checked him over, her fingertips touched his jawline as she turned his head. “Your face is healing, but it will be scarred–”  

“Adds a bit of mystery to my rugged good looks,” his eyes peered at her, searching for a response. 

She did not stop her smile in time and his expression was victorious. “Bennett–” her tone warned, but she saw his eyes look past her. 

Her hands dropped to her side and she turned to see German soldiers making their way down the hallway and one stopping to watch their interaction. She looked back at him, his jaw clenched and nostrils flared, with a passion that brimmed in his beautiful eyes and threatened to spill onto his lips. “Bitte, Bennett,” her voice was low with her exhale and his eyes flitted to her for a moment, watching as she pushed from the bed to retrieve her items and tucking his clipboard under her arm. “What are you doing with that prisoner?” The soldier asked with a scathing Berlinerisch dialect, squaring towards her and causing another soldier to stop to watch them both. 

She swallowed thickly, debating to feign ignorance to the German he spoke before deciding to return his burning gaze. “I am tending to our prisoners of war, soldier.”

“Really,” he scoffed. “It seems more to me as if you were sweet on him. You remember he is the enemy? Every bed in this hospital holds an enemy to our cause.”

“I am very aware,” she replied, her eyes narrowed onto him. “Which is why I take pride in my work, to ensure our great leader will have healthy prisoners of war to serve him in the camps. But you have decided to hold up my rounds.”

The soldier ran his tongue over his front teeth, sucking as he processed her reply. Without warning, he raised his arm and struck her across the jaw with the back of his hand. 

Her head jerked to the side, losing her hold on the supplies and the tin echoed as it crashed to the floor. From the corner of her eyes, she saw Bennett pressed to stand but saw her focused on him, her look warning him to remain where he was. 

The white stars dissipated in front of her eyes and Vera rightened her posture, returning to face the soldier straight on, daring to step towards him. “Does our great leader condone striking members of the Party?” Her tone was cold. “You come to your assignment with the assumption that I am working against his plans, when in fact,” her eyes went back and forth between the two soldiers, “I have been sent here by Major Sieber, to help prepare for our conquest of France.”

They jerked to attention with the name drop and the second soldier now spoke. “Forgive him, my lady. He is new and ignorant to our final solution. We will not bother you again.” His hand planted onto the offending officer and he pulled him to follow the rest of the passing soldiers.

Vera turned away from them, gripping the clipboard and taking deep, shaky breaths. “Did they hurt you?” She looked up to see Bennett, his brow scrunched with concern, giving a softness to his features she had not seen before. 

“I am fine,” she replied, dropping to her knees to gather the gauze and her tools, returning them with soft plinks into the basin. 

“Christ, I’m not blind! I saw how hard he–”

Her head shot up, her eyes bore into him and stopped him from talking. “I said I am fine.” Her voice was harsher than she wished it would sound, but she did not dare to risk catching the attention of someone else in uniform, especially since she boldly proclaimed a Major’s name from a telegram she saw, claiming he assigned her, personally, to this hospital. 

Stupid, you literally risk yourself, the hospital, Henriette, the doctor… Her thoughts were rushed and she ignored the scowl on his face, turning to walk towards the back office and cursing herself with every step. Vera pushed open the door and found Henriette and Dr. O’Connor seated at his desk, sharing a sandwich. 

“Vera?” The doctor pushed to stand up the second he saw her face. “What happened?” 

“I… fucked up.” The adrenaline left her and it was only when she spoke did she notice how tender her upper lip felt. She moved to where her purse hung and pulled out a compact mirror to check the damage done; there was split to her lip line and a smear of blood, with the beginning of a bruise to her jaw. “The Germans are here and they questioned me while I was with Bennett.”

“Oh, Vera,” Henriette was quick to retrieve a cotton swab and some alcohol. 

She allowed her friend to dab at the small cut, wincing from the burn. “I was stupid. I remembered the telegram on your desk and I said that Major Sieber had personally assigned me to work here…” she saw his grimace and for a moment, felt tears threaten her eyes. “I panicked, Webster. I did not know what else to say!”

He sat back down at his desk, searching for a piece of paper and handing her a telegram. Her eyes read over the words and she passed it to Henriette. “This is not the same one I saw before…” 

“Do you ladies remember Lyam?” He asked instead.

The girls nodded, for they remembered him fondly. Lyam was an old French man with a full head of silver hair and ice blue eyes that twinkled when he spoke. He had been admitted one night with a broken toe months ago and made little complaint when Dr. O’Connor set it; his gay tone was infectious and he teased Henriette and Vera to leave the hospital when he was discharged. “I have a son for each of you lovely ladies,” he had told them. 

“What about Lyam?” Henriette asked.

“Well,” his tone lowered and they moved closer to the desk. “Lyam and his sons are no Nazi sympathizers and have been working on an escape route to smuggle the soldiers from the hospital. They are setting up a route through the Pyrenees and into Spain, his sons currently reside in Pamplona, and then finally to Gibraltar where they can go to Britain.” 

“Webster,” Henriette paled and she bit the corner of her lip for a moment, careful with her words. “This is dangerous to speak. Can we be certain to trust these men…?” 

Vera remembered the warmth of Lyam’s eyes, the passion that brimmed when they spoke over his distaste for the German dictatorship and his empathy towards her. You were brave to escape, he had said to her. “I believe we can,” she said, looking at them both. “What must we do to help?” 

The doctor exhaled. “Well, we need to check and see if this route can work. We would also need to open a bank account in Great Britain so we can wire funding back and forth, as well as finding someone willing to meet at the checkpoints.” 

“I can do this,” she nodded and when she saw how the doctor looked at her, she added, “This is something that must be done and I can do it, Webster.”

Over the months they had all worked together, the doctor and Henriette never pressed to ask what made Vera decide to leave her folks in Berlin. She voiced her vague distaste for the NSDAP ideals, but nothing more. However, whatever the determination she brought from Berlin now clearly showed itself in this office. 

Dr. O’Connor nodded his head, a small smile to his lips. “Very well, Vera,” he cleared his throat. “I have some business to attend to, but I will find a soldier willing to offer themselves as a guinea pig.” He saw her brow furrow and explained, “We need someone who will test this. We would need them to register as a prisoner of war, then we can forge a death certificate, assuming the Germans won’t be as adamant to search for a dead man-” “What if they wish to see a body?” His chuckle was dark, “That is something we have in abundance.” 

----

previous | Chapter 3

[foxisscared]

A Meaningful Conversation

Gale Dekarios x Tiefling!Oc!Tav

A/N:Hi,so I have no idea what I'm doing, but I thought I'd give this a try with my Tav. His name is Amadius and he's a Tiefling Barbarian. Also I'm still trying to get a feeling for Gale's character so if you have any pointers please feel free to comment

Amadius was never one for idle company. He was not one for company at all, used to only relying on himself and not staying in one place long enough to forge meaningful relationships. Which is why this group unsettled him and the fact that he was automatically made leader further unnerved him. He was not used to having to care for this many people before and it showed. Even though he was considered their leader Amadius kept to himself, avoiding unnecessary chatter amongst party members, but there was one person who caught his eye.

The silly little wizard named Gale of Waterdeep who often chatted at him about things Amadius didn't quite understand, something Amadius didn't mind quite as much as he thought he would. He'd even come to expect the conversation, dare he say happily anticipated them. Today was no different Gale and Amadius sat around the campfire while Gale was cooking, Amadius looking brooding as always.

"Amadius, are you paying attention?" Gale asks as Amadius looked like he'd zoned out.

"Yes Gale, I am listening. I believe you were talking about certain incatricies of the weave, not that I understand any of it but I do find it quite interesting" He says, still not looking at the man. Gale looked surprised that anyone much less a barbarian such as himself was actually paying attention to him.

"I'd be more than happy to explain it to you. I can't remember the last time someone actually sat down and listened to what I have to say" Gale said with a chuckle but immediately quieted down noticing Amadius' far away look. "Are you okay Amadius?" He asked. "Far be it of me to demand you tell me what's wrong but I am here to support you" He said causing visible hesitation to form on Amadius' face

"Uhm... Its nothing, Gale. Its just very overwhelming going from living on your own for 20 years to leading a group of 6 people to defeat a world ending evil. I'm not used to this many people, much less leading them. I was never one for being emotionally invested and now I fear I'm more emotionally invested than ever" He says with vulnerability that seemed quite out of character for him

"Being on your own for 20 years sounds quite lonely" Gale says softly, looking at Amadius with a look Amadius couldnt quite place.

"Yeah well, that's just how things are. You go through life, prove your worth to those around you, and if you don't, you die alone. Once you disappoint enough people, you learn when to stop being a nusiance and just leave" Amadius said so casually it caught Gale off guard.

"Oh... Well... I am sure you'll prove more than valubale to our party, then there's no way you'll have to leave." Gale said awkwardly, causing Amadius to scoff and smile softly

"One can only hope." Amadius said softly glancing at Gale with an uncharacteristically soft smile. He really did hope he could prove useful, despite his best efforts he was growing quite attached to this little party and didn't want to disappoint them.

"Well... Enough depressing things for tonight, how about I finish up dinner and we eat around the campfire?" Gale says after clearing his throat as he went back to stirring the pot causing Amadius to chuckle.

"Yeah, lets do that... Then you can finally finish explaining the weave to me. Which by the way I still don't understand and I don't think I ever will understand" Amadius says causing Gale to laugh.

"Well that's what I'm here for, my friend" He said, and when the word friend left Gale's mouth, something melted in Amadius, causing him to tear up just the slightest.

"Yeah... I'd like that" Amadius said softly with a smile.

[howtowhumpyourhiccup]

Disgrace of The Family

Summary: Written for Angstober 2023 Day 1. Set after season 6’s “Poison.” Coming home without the Book of Dragons makes Tom feel even worse than he feared it would.

Warning: /

Rating: General

Characters: Tom

Pairing: /

Words: 534

Fandom: How to Train Your Dragon, The Nine Realms

Prompt: Honorbound

Whumpee: Tom

Author’s Notes: Knowing how the loudest portion thinks of The Nine Realms, chances are people will come across this fic thinking it's going to bash Tom.

It is not, make your own fic, Tom is baby. :)

Hopefully the first of many TNR fics.

Enjoy!

XoXoX

When Tom returns home after the Buzzsaw fiasco, he’s almost glad that his mom isn’t home yet. Though it feels bad to enter an empty dome, he wouldn’t want to explain to her that he lost the Book of Dragons. It’s like losing a priceless family heirloom.

Besides, it would also require telling her about the axe-wielding madman he and the other Dragon Club members have been encountering in the Realms. And if any of the adults knew… Well, they would probably have to say their dragons goodbye for good. And if the events of today have shown him anything, it’s that Tom isn’t ready to say goodbye to Thunder yet.

Leaving his backpack by the door of his room, he closes it and drops down onto his bed.

Today has been awful. Awful! Thunder could’ve died because of Buzzsaw’s poison dart and then it turned out he didn’t even have the antidote like he claimed he had! Tom never wants to see the Nightlight in so much pain ever again.

He still can’t believe he just gave him the Book of Dragons. Of course, he did it because he thought Thunder was running out of time and anyone of them would’ve done the same. Even D’Angelo said as much, but knowing so doesn’t lighten the guilty pit in his stomach in the slightest.

He rolls onto his back and stares up at the ceiling.

“I wonder what he would’ve done,” Tom wonders out loud. He finds himself thinking of a man who is long-dead.

‘Hiccup,’ that was the name of his ancestor. Or who Tom assumes to be his ancestor on account of sharing a last name with his mom’s grandfather and a bunch of other clues. He must’ve been the author of the book Tom lost. Or he was certainly a big part of it.

What would he have done had he been faced with Tom’s situation? Or was he so good at being a dragon rider that he simply never got into situations like this? He was a Viking, after all, and Vikings were tough people.

Sitting up in bed, Tom faces a picture taken of the portrait that is the most likely to be Hiccup’s.

He thought having it near, having something physical beside the book, something to look at would encourage him. He feels a strange familial connection with it even if there’s literal centuries separating the two. He hoped it would help him make the right decisions, help him make the ancient dragon rider proud, but now he just feels like he is failing and disgracing a family name he hadn’t even heard off before until a little while ago.

If Hiccup had been here… would he have been angry with him? Disappointed in him?

Or would he have understood Tom’s actions today?

“Oh great, and now I feel even worse,” Tom mutters. He drops back down onto his side, facing away from the picture as he can no longer bear to look at it.

He’ll get the book back. And not just to keep Buzzsaw from using it with bad intentions, but also because he doesn’t want to be haunted by the disappointment of a long-dead ghost.

[bad-at-names-and-faces]

A Strange, Wild Scheme

Day 6 (yes, it's the 7th as I write this) with the prompt "time loop" and Catherine Morland and Eleanor TIlney from Northanger Abbey...

Eleanor Tilney bid farewell to her new friend, Miss Morland, as she and her brother Henry left.

“Remember, twelve o’clock!” Miss Morland called out as they were leaving.

“Provided it does not rain, of course!” Eleanor called back. 

“She is a sweet girl, is she not?” she asked her brother on the way home.  He said nothing, only giving the slightest smile that none but his sister would notice.

The following morning was cloudy, which did not bode well for a walk, but Eleanor and her brother agreed that by noon, the weather would most likely improve. 

The days in Bath were often quite indistinguishable, so it was a pleasant diversion that morning to look forward to a walk like this. 

Much to her dismay, however, later in the morning, it began to rain.  The walk might have to be postponed. 

“It’s noon now,” she lamented to her brother. “I’m afraid we won’t be able to see Miss Morland today.”

“Perhaps it will clear up soon enough,” he declared.  

As if by the power of his own words, the rain cleared up within half an hour. 

“Perhaps Miss Morland will still be at home,” Eleanor said. 

They gathered their things quickly, and walked to the house where their new friend was staying. Upon arrival, they learned that she had left with the Thorpes only a few minutes prior.

“What now?” Eleanor asked her brother as they left disappointed.

***

Eleanor woke up and looked outside.  

“Another grey morning,” she sighed, remembering the previous day’s disappointment. Perhaps she would call on Miss Morland this morning. It had been raining at noon when they were to meet, so that may have been the source of the confusion. 

She found her brother alone downstairs reading.

“I think I shall call on Miss Morland this morning,” she said.

“I believe you had agreed upon noon,” he replied.

“What?” she asked. “Have you spoken to her? Are we going to attempt the walk again?”

“Again?” he asked, perplexed. “I believe the first you spoke of the arrangement was last night at the party.”

“Last night?” She thought for a moment. “That is a relief. I think I had a dream that we had not been able to get to her house on time, and we did not see her the rest of the day. It was a very dull and disappointing dream.”

“You are anxious that the social call will go well, that is quite understandable,” he smiled. 

***

Catherine Morland found Mrs. Allen downstairs. 

“I think I will call on Miss Tilney this morning,” Catherine announced. It had been disappointing not seeing her new friend the day before, and she had never made it to the castle, and all in all she would have much rather stayed home doing nothing.

“But I thought they were to come here,” Mrs. Allen said. “I believe you agreed on noon, did you not?”

“Oh,” Catherine said. “I had the oddest dream, I suppose. I’m very glad it was only a dream, though.”

***

“This is so odd,” Eleanor said as they left the house where Miss Morland was staying. “The servant said the very same thing in my dream.”

“Perhaps it is merely that there are a limited number of things a servant will say to callers,” her brother suggested. “It is not his job to think of original prose, but to let visitors know whether someone is home or has gone out.”

Eleanor nodded. That must be it.

***

Catherine Moreland sat in the carriage as the began the journey, wondering at how the day had gone nearly the same as the dream she had.  As they left Bath, Catherine wondered if they would actually see the phaeton that Mr. Thorpe had told her he had seen Miss Tilney and her brother driving. 

The rest of the day went much like the previous day, and she returned home even more disappointed than she had been. She would definitely want to find Miss Tilney the next day.

***

Eleanor looked out the window.  It was another grey day, except something about the clouds was too similar. It wasn’t simply that it was another cloudy day, but the clouds and the sun seemed to come at the exact same times as the day before, and she was quite sure it was the same as it had been in her dream, if that even had been a dream. This was too strange.

She ran downstairs as soon as she could, and found her brother reading.

“What are your plans for today?” she asked him.

“We were planning to go on a walk with Miss Morland, were we not? You agreed on that with her last night.”

***

The rain had cleared exactly as it had the prior days, for Catherine was quite certain that it was not a dream now.  What it was, she did not know, but it did not seem to be a dream. She dreaded hearing the familiar voices approaching the door.  They would be asking her to go with them, and would not care that she had plans.  But, of course, if Miss Tilney and her brother had left without her, that was very well. Still, if it was going to be the same day, she wished to avoid going with them if she could, though she was not sure if her will was strong enough.

***

Eleanor looked around as they left the house where Miss Morland was staying.  They had turned to the left previously, but perhaps if they headed in the other direction, it would at least be something different.

“Why are you going that way?” her brother asked as she pulled on his arm.

“I simply wish to,” she replied. 

With a shrug, he followed her. She heard a carriage in the distance, and looked over. 

“I believe that was Miss Morland,” she said. “But she is too far to see for sure.”

“Well, I suppose she will have an enjoyable day,” her brother said, sounding slightly annoyed at the idea.

***

Once again, Catherine’s party did not make it to the promised castle, and once again, she had not seen her new friends. She began to wonder if perhaps this was all a dream, but what then? 

She found a sheet of paper, and wrote a note to herself. She hoped she would find it in the morning, and as she awoke, she remembered the note, but found that everything was it had been every morning.  

After so many days, Catherine had now given up on anything changing. She waited for the rain, and then the inevitable call from the Thorpes.  Aside from a comment from Mrs. Allen that she seemed particularly out of spirits, nothing was changed.

On this day, however, as they were going along, she saw Miss Tilney and her brother walking along the street, not, as Mr. Thorpe had told her, driving in a phaeton.

“Stop!” she shouted.

***

Eleanor had tried for days now to get closer to the carriage in which she had seen Miss Morland, and some days her brother was just slow enough that she missed it entirely, and other days she got close enough to see, she was sure, Miss Morland looking distinctly unhappy to be there. Eleanor did not like that she was finding some joy in this fact, but it did provide some diversion to the days that were otherwise so difficult to tell apart. 

Today, her brother had allowed just quick enough of a pace that the carriage passed directly by them, and she saw Miss Morland turning around and waving.  She could have sworn that she heard her telling Mr. Thorpe to stop, but her brother did not seem to have noticed.

Still, it was different.  Different was good.

0o0o0

Catherine woke up and noticed the clouds. They were different. She had almost forgotten that the clouds could be different, though she wasn’t entirely sure if she could trust this.

As soon as she found Mrs. Allen, Catherine inquired about calling on Miss Tilney this morning, expecting the answer that Miss Tilney and her brother were to call on her.

“Go, by all means, my dear; only put on a white gown; Miss Tilney always wears white.”

[tongue---tied]

HI!!! Red Dwarf or the ask meme please! I'd much like to know your interpretations and thoughts! <3

Im throwing this under a cut because, boy, this is gonna be a long one

❤️Favorite character

This won't come as a surprise to many of any of you but, yeah, it's rimmer. I want to put him in situations, I want to take him out of situations, there's the full duality there. I relate to him a lot (which probably isn't a good sign lol) and I strongly believe you cannot have red dwarf without him (i mean, look at the ratings for season 7 even with the girlboss that is kochanski). His character itself has such good potential, the angst that comes with being a hologram, the touch-starved-ness (?), his entire childhood, his need for academic validation even 3 million years into the future when all who would care anyway are dead, I could go on forever.

👿Least favorite character

Don't do this to me man 😭 I don't even know if I have one?? At least not out of the main crew. There's no character that actually makes me vibrate with rage in a bad way... If I did really have a think it would probably be a one-off character that was only in one episode and never mentioned again. Oh! I've just remembered, some fanon interpretations of Toddhunter honestly made my skin crawl with how horrible he is, but obviously that's just fanon, and some fanon interpretations have him as honestly a really good meaning guy- looking at you, Work Thing ;)

💐Comfort character

If you can't guess at this point I honestly don't know what to say. It's rimmer, look I know I know, the comfort character who has had no comfort in his entire life/death but *slaps roof of car* this baby can fit so much projection! He's so varied, he's gay to me, he's bi to me, he's autistic to me, he has ptsd to me, he's yearning, he's in denial, he's just- HE *I am dragged away by a lone hand through the doorframe before I can continue*

😍Character you have the biggest crush on

Are you sensing a theme yet 😐 I'd say I don't wish to be perceived for this but let's be honest, my tags reveal all, and the majority of the fandom agrees. It's Rimmer. Again. Slightly outing myself as an x reader enjoyer here. *shaking him* I could fix him I really believe I could. (I'm glad you're the one who sent the ask, Lexie, we can both bond over being self shippers lol)

🤝Character you relate to the most

WHY IS IT ALWAYS RIMMER ON THIS ASK GAME PLEASE HELP😭😭😭 Hes a stickler for the rules (as long as they benefit him), he's probably autistic, he loves hammond organ music (very disappointed that he hates my main man Glenn Miller though 😔), he was an outcast for most of his childhood, he was bullied, he spirals at the slightest bad thing. I'm starting to really sense this isnt a good thing 😭 (I swear I'm doing okay I've got a good support system please don't worry)

🔥Character you think is overrated

I don't know?? 😭😭 I think all of red dwarf's characters really add to the material as a whole, and hey, it's not like this fandom is really big enough for overrating anything. I might say Duane Dibley, because yeah he's funny, Danny really performs well as that character but I don't really understand as to why he was so much of a fan favourite that they brought him back (for season 6 I think it was?) So if I had to say one character it would be Duane.

🧨Character you love to hate

*smacking my face against the doorframe* its rimmer again 😭😭😭 he's such a prick, especially in the early seasons man, I simultaneously want to look after him and throw him against a wall. I contain multitudes, it's okay

🙈Character you always forget exists

I guess I'd have to say Holly? He's got brilliant comedic timing and delivery (as Lovett and Hayridge) but the fact she was cut out in the later seasons and then brought back in season 8 and then gone again in the more recent ones just feels disjointed so she's easily forgotten sadly. (Yes I use she/he pronouns for Holly, she's genderfluid to me <3)

🐰Favorite non-human character

I'm gonna be honest, it would really have to be Holly. (I'm discounting Hologram Rimmer because he still sees himself as human in some way and he's had far too much screentime in this post). The comedic timing, the deadpan delivery, that amazing scene where she counts by smacking her head against the screen always makes me howl.

❤️‍🩹Character who deserved better

All of them. All of them. Rimmer, for reasons we've already gone into. Lister, the survivors guilt, he was SA'd at 12?!!, his entire relationship with Kochanski, his alcoholism, crushing loneliness, I could go on. The Cat, his entire species left him and his family because they were old and/or disabled, again loneliness. Kryten, literally in denial about his crew being dead, left alone for over 3 million years and still somehow hanging onto his sanity through episodes of androids, the need to do anything, literally anything to make sure he doesn't think to hard about anything other than laundry, honestly people need to talk about him more. Kochanski, losing her dave, stuck with this dave who looks exactly like hers but is so different, watching him destroy himself, having nothing in common with any of the crew, LONELINESS MAN.

Thank you so much for the ask! This was a long one phew

[red-dyed-sarumane]

OKAY VOCACOLLE SUMMER TOP 15 SONGS (my ranking) LETS GOO

1. Kannagi - Hiiragi Magnetite: the lyrics on this are going to keep me occupied for the longest time until i understand it better. the atmosphere of this song is just incredible, the addition of the bells in her hand in the song, the light chime-y parts of the the instrumental, the piano, the longer notes, u dont need to know the lyrics to know theres a sense of regret in here. theres enough in the chimes u can feel the inner reflection in this, & like other series songs it hits that standing at the end of world in the rain feeling. its paced so perfectly it doesnt even feel like 6 minutes. series wise i think thats not only a call back to kyuuyaku but like shoushitsu & kyuuyaku it shows off that loop theme, getting into whats going on building it up, theres a bit of calm and then it picks up again. lots of story telling & details in it to add to the narrative. haru fits it so perfectly & that's definitely by design. this song has already embedded itself in my heart

2. Stockholm Office - Crump: if kannagi wasnt posted this would take first place EASILY IMMEDIATELY. i cant say in words how much i loved this so instantly. the light whispery-ness of kafu & the spacey-ness of certain instruments and parts combined with the heavy groundedness of the rest of it is so so perfect. the poetic way the lyrics show off the state of things in this song without being super blunt about the complaints in it & the overall rhythm of it draws me in so so much. they really matched the mood of the instrumentals & the lyrics so perfectly. its not spacey enough for me to say true dissociation type feel but theres such a strong feeling of disconnection in this, that feeling of lying to urself to stick something out which im sure is entirely intended given the title. im about to become the number one promoter of this song its one of those found it at the perfect timing things for me.

3. Candy Drop - yurame: this has the usual yurame song feel. i can only describe it as sounding how carbonation in drinks feels. its trendy sounding but at the same time is all its own thing and authentic feeling. the lyrics are written in a way its like ah yeah i get that feeling. despite the lightness of the instrumental its good at getting that melancholic feel across & isnt jarring in the slightest. flower has that mix of rough & cute to suit this as well. very good song.

4. Quiet - szri: szri's usual quick & heavy pacing definitely building off what they did in anaphylaxis. even includes the smallest part of it & u know i love songs that connect to each other. gekiyaku & kafu are such a good combination too especially how they pull it off. not a very light song in terms of content but fun nonetheless & isnt that what vocaloids about.

5. Euthanasia - Dopam!ne: a lighter/simpler song in terms of instrumentals that he does. nice change & still very distinctly his style. definitely not a light song in terms of content the guy even put a content disclaimer at the end. still easy to listen to if u like his style tho. good song

6. Waste - mairu: this ones probably about as heavy as szri's quiet musically speaking though theres a few calmer sections. flower's roughness fits the topic well i think. another one where the mood of every part of the song just seems to align well. i dont have anything profound to say i just think its neat

7. OSINT - Sheeno Mirin: i love the atmosphere in sheeno mirin songs a lot & this one doesnt disappoint. interesting vocal combination choice not that they overlap in any part & they work well with what they were going for. theres something brain scratching (in a good way) about the instrumental, a full sound thats got a weight to it but isnt too much. its really good idk what else to say

8. groom groove - yowanecity: i feel like its been forever since ive seen anything from yowanecity i really should follow them anyway i got really excited to see they posted & this didn't disappoint. its got that bounciness i expect from their songs. fun & smooth sounding. makes u want to dance. definitely worth your time.

9. Capsule - Fuyuu: cat rime & sekai thats so fun i love that and then the gachpon theme on top of it so fun. the sound is not what you'd expect from that description tho. it has a darker feel to it almost grungy i want to say but definitely not off putting. as part of the rime lover nation i love this song. this is going to end up stuck in my head all the time just like crow crow does. very good & both sekai & rime sound like they belong in this song 👍

10. Gambit - Yunosuke: another trendy, almost bubbly sounding song from yunosuke. pretty atmosphere to it. love the whistles & traditional sound instruments mixed in with the otherwise modern electric type sound its got going on. this would be fun to sing if i take the time to learn the lyrics. super good very worth your time

11. Rain - Gomennasai ga ienakute: the usual simple sounding style they have, deceivingly simple sounding bc its very clearly not. the tension building part right before the 3 min mark hits me in particular. very cool rin high notes at the end. very nice melancholic mood to it. maybe i should rank this higher its growing on me the more i listen to it. their lyric sense is very good. compels me. definitely give this a listen.

12. Static Love - Hagino: kafu rap nation rise up. its got that chiptune sound at first that gradually gives into a more modern edm sound. a good mix of cute, cool, and fun sounding. underrated the mixing & execution of this is too good to only have a few hundred views & yet here we are. worth your time

13. Prototype - Aira: THIS SONG GOES SO HARD!! coko chisei is such a good combo too. interesting theme going on here but the melody & such is just very good. the lalala parts make it seem a little lighter than it actually is. love the slightly wavering slightly squeaky sound on both vocals. lends a certain charm to this song.

14. Lewder Liar - Zensen: another great electro swing song from zensen. very fun fresh sounding instrumentals & flower's in no way out of place here. good mix. kind of an interesting theme going on here what with the demon stuff etc.

15. Death Game - Uron Riyu: this one is so fun to me. kafu running a death game. posting this as a vocacolle song feels like its framing vocacolle itself as a death game between songs & thats such an interesting way to look at it. kinda fun. the composition on its fun in its own way too. ik it's supposed to be dark but its just a fun song to me.

[bakuliwrites]

Lunar Halo, Chapter 3- Opalescent

Rating: 18+ (for future chapters), Minors DNI!!!!!

Chapter Links: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, Ending 1, Ending 2

Fandom: Dark Souls

Relationships: Dark Sun Gwyndolin/OC, Dark Sun Gwyndolin/Chosen Undead

Tags for Whole Work: Major Character Death, Angst, Fluff, Smut, Romance, Grief/Mourning, Body Horror, Body Worship, Oral S*x, Penetrative S*x, Vaginal Fingering, Friends to Lovers, Bodyguard Romance, Blades of the Darkmoon, Marriage (and not in the Dark Souls 3 definition of it...), Marriage Proposal, Gwyndolin uses he/him pronouns, Falling in Love

Chapter Summary: Gwyndolin finds himself thinking of his Blade, even when she's not around. As they grow closer, he wonders if perhaps they're getting too familiar with one another. Read here or on my AO3

Despite wanting to distance himself from the situation, Gwyndolin finds himself musing over the conversation he’d had with his Blade. She keeps creeping into his mind at various points throughout his boring days. The small smile that crept onto her weary face, the tiny chuckle. When she asked him if he grew lonely, it struck a chord deep within the Dark Sun. She punctured some flimsy membrane in him, one that held at bay the bitter, oozing pool of his seclusion. The sorrow it contained soaks his lungs now, whispers through his veins, and crusts like salt deposits on his bones. Suddenly, in the silence of his Father’s Tomb, he feels the immense weight of his solitude. Did this human curse him somehow with her simple question? Or did she merely bring to the Dark Sun’s attention a feeling that has been plaguing him for many ages now? 

In his boredom, Gwyndolin’s ear listens intently for any inkling of his Blade’s return. At the slightest sound, he is alerted, perking up in his chair, eyes darting towards the fog gate. Disappointment wells in his heart when he sees it is not her. He waits patiently, diligently keeping watch over his Father’s Tomb, though letting his mind wander to his Blade. He wonders what they’ll talk about, what sorts of things she’ll ask him, or tales she’ll tell him. When she finally does return, Gwyndolin feels his heart flutter at the sight of her, and it scares him. 

His Blade lingers a while, greeting him jovially and seating herself before the fog gate. She is the most relaxed he has ever seen her, though not uncouth, maintaining a dignified posture in this holy temple. She rests her arm upon her knee and weaves Gwyndolin a mesmerizing tale of her pilgrimage to Anor Londo. She did not come seeking anything, journeying only to journey. There is nothing left in the world for her, or for anyone, really. Organized society in most places has long since crumbled and Anor Londo is one of the few cities that offer any sort of refuge to pilgrims. She explains that the Covenant has given her purpose, and she is grateful for it. She does not go into greater specifics, perhaps not ready to share anything beyond a skin-deep account of her life. Though, someday, that will change.

As his Blade shares news of the world beyond this palace, Gwyndolin seats himself on the floor opposite her. Though illusion is her blindfold, she seems aware that he is near, glancing up at the rustling fabric of his robes. She keeps her distance for her first couple of visits, but slowly over time, she draws closer and closer to the gate. And Gwyndolin finds himself moving nearer as well. He lounges against the archway, head resting on the cool marble, watching his Blade curiously from behind the separation of fog and mask. He likes the way the corners of her eyes crinkle when she smiles, the way she lights up when Gwyndolin asks her to stay a little longer. 

She asks him questions. What was Gwyn like? What about Gwyndolin’s other siblings? What are his duties and does he enjoy them? Gwyndolin, much to his own mortification, finds himself answering all of these, though concealing much of his responsibilities. He tries to keep his descriptions as vague as possible, not ready to reveal the inner workings of Anor Londo to this stranger, to this human. He does, however, lay out the story of his upbringing. When he finishes, he is met with a crestfallen gaze.

“You are a loyal child, my Lord,” she breathes, her brows knit with sorrow, “It is thankless work, is it not?”

Gwyndolin feels something shatter inside him, fragile glass embedding in his heart with the mirroring of her words. Was it not long ago that he asked if her work was thankless? Perhaps they are not all that different, gods and men. Gwyndolin has never questioned his duty. Never wondered if the work he does is worth it or not. Not receiving any recognition for his loyalty is something Gwyndolin has gotten used to. It is not his place to receive praise or acknowledgement for doing what he is supposed to be doing. For maintaining his birthright. He’s never thought about his position as a thankless one. And yet…

“It is, I suppose,” he admits, voice quiet, just barely above a whisper, as if the ghost of his Father were lingering nearby, ready to punish him for such slander. Furtively, he whispers this next secret, a secret he has never shared with anyone before, “I am consigned to obscurity for the sake of image. To uphold an ancient ruling. A dynasty built on the gilded rays of the sun. I was a terrible disappointment to my Father. The light of the moon dims in comparison to the incandescent star my Father idolized.”

He trails off, not sure where he is going with this. Not sure he should be speaking in such a manner, and to a human, no less. He mentally flogs himself for such treasonous words about his family, for speaking a truth that has no place in this world. A truth that should never have been spoken, that should have been buried in the cold earth and left to rot for all eternity.

“I have always favored the moon,” his Blade speaks, her eyes gazing into a distant past, “Her light is softer. More benevolent. Her rays do not blind or scorch or wither. She is a gentle body who rules the Heavens with grace.” 

She passes a knowing glance his way, smiling softly to herself. Gwyndolin is speechless, breath caught in his throat. How is he to respond to such a thing? To such a kind notion that he hardly feels deserving of? 

“My Gentle Lord,” she goes on, pressing her hand lightly to the fog barrier, but not daring to breach it, “I thank thee for thy stories. For bearing thy heart to me. I will not tarnish nor disrespect the honor I have had, today, of listening to you speak.”

 Gwyndolin stares at her hand for a moment, mind blank, before he slowly reaches out. He presses his palm to hers, lets her briefly feel his warmth against her skin. She lets her eyelids fall shut, eyelashes gracing her cheeks with spider-web shadows. There is a beauty to her tenderness, to her humanity. In the span of his life, the Dark Sun has met few who would take the time to sit with him, to know him. It is strange that a human of little renown would be the one to draw him from his solitude. But here they are, a being of Light and a being of Shadow, quietly enjoying one another’s company.

“And I thank thee,” Gwyndolin finally manages, nearly choking on his own emotion, one he has yet to identify, “I await your return, your conversation. Blessing of the benevolent moon upon thy journey.” 

Gwyndolin’s mind is fraught with confusion in the interim between his Blade’s visits. Though she has never gazed upon him, she seems to see him in some ethereal capacity. Loyal Gwyndolin, bound to duty, bound to dynasty. Fealty pledged to a tyrant Father long gone, whose presence has never dwindled despite His absence. Gwyndolin, always in the shadows, eclipsed by the Sun. Gwyndolin, silver moonlight that does not blind or scorch or wither. Gentle Gwyndolin, who rules with grace. 

Her words play over and over in his mind, passing over his thoughts like the crystal tides of a clear sea. They bathe him with warmth and he finds himself staring out at the moon with wonder rather than resentment. A silver gem faceted into the bathyal sky, surrounded by stars flickering in and out of existence. For once, the moon looks beautiful to him. 

Guilt, however, worms its way into his heart. As he and his Blade grow closer, Gwyndolin wonders if he ought to inform her of his greatest secret. Their conversations have begun to last hours, hours that feel like no time is passing at all. She bears her heart to him, though he can still sense a healthy caution in her words. A hesitance on both their parts. She never asks to see him, but he can tell that she wants to. Perhaps it would make conversation easier, but the Dark Sun does not feel ready to reveal himself to her. Everything he works so hard to maintain is contingent on his ability to uphold illusion. The balance of the world teeters on this. 

She does not know that it is the Dark Sun who calls to the Undead, who calls for them to kindle the Flame. To sacrifice themselves, so that the Age of Fire might carry on. Or maybe she does know and it does not trouble her. Gwyndolin wonders if she is one of those Undead, called by prophecy, false or otherwise, to carry out his Father’s legacy. Compelled to burn in the furnace-womb of this world. Is this something worthy of addressing, or is it best to leave it be? Gwyndolin opts to remain silent on the matter, until it becomes relevant. If it ever becomes relevant. Already he feels he has grown too close to this human. But in his loneliness, he can’t seem to help it. And it would be monumentally untrue to say that he is not starting to care deeply for this strange woman.

The next time she returns to him, his Blade bears her usual souvenirs and a little something extra. She sets before the fog barrier a simple stone, carved in the shape of a crescent moon. She averts her gaze so that Gwyndolin can collect these gifts, unseen. When he is back behind the safety of his barrier, Gwyndolin holds the stone up to the cold light of the moon beyond his window. Upon closer inspection, he discovers a bit of opalescent flecks scattered throughout the otherwise unassuming beige rock. It glints, shimmering almost joyously as he turns it this way and that.

“What is it that thou hast brought me?” the god questions, perplexed by this gesture. 

“I thought it lovely,” his Blade returns, looking sheepishly at her feet, “And it reminded me of you.” 

A small smile tugs at the corners of the Dark Sun’s lips. He draws the stone to his heart, pink blush blooming along his cheeks. He has nothing to give his Blade in return, aside from the usual items to recognize her victory. He will think of something worthy of such a kindness. She stays for a long while that night, listening as Gwyndolin recounts fables of eras long gone. After a bit, they fall into comfortable silence, each staring out at the clear, star-blanketed sky beyond. Gwyndolin is alerted to his Blade’s slumber when she lets out a small, exhausted sigh through her nose. Her eyes have fallen shut and she is slumped most uncomfortably against the archway, chin resting on her chest. 

Gently, and at great risk to himself, Gwyndolin lifts his Blade from where she slumbers and carries her to one of the empty bedchambers down the hall. Her fatigue is deep, and she does not wake even when Gwyndolin lays her down atop one of the unused beds. Stealthily, he returns to his post, heart racing in fear that she might have seen him. It was rather foolish of him, he thinks, to have done such a thing. But she looked so terribly uncomfortable. He didn’t have it in him to just leave her there. 

As he waits for her return once more, Gwyndolin keeps her stone gift on his person at all times. He finds himself reaching for it when his thoughts turn to nerves and ruin. He worries it with his thumb and thinks of his Blade, somewhere out in the world, perhaps gazing up at the same distant sky. 

A/N: I am excited because I have come up with a couple item descriptions and tried to match the tone of the games as best I could. Those won't make their appearance for a couple chapters yet, but one of those items will likely include the crescent-moon stone :) I hope you have all had a lovely weekend! Looking forward to posting the next chapter on Wednesday. Lots of love💜

[niyana-the-ambiguous-mobian]

Just finished the Miraculous movie

I do know that this film was in production for A LONG WHILE and I thought it wasn’t going to ever get released to the US for some time and now that I’ve seen it..l.

Well…at least the animation was pretty good??

Some spoilers underneath the cut

Didn’t expect all the damn songs. They sounded good ngl but…they made this a musical??? It felt kinda distracting at times. Although I did like 3 of them so that’s something worth rewatching.

That duet between Ladybug and Chat had me smiling for a bit.

HawkMoth’s song was so outta nowhere but hey, free villain song AND it sounds pretty well done? I’ll take it.

And Chat’s solo, mwah. Very nice

The actions scenes were pretty fun to watch, that part from the show was carried over well with how they used the akumatized character’s powers in unique and creative ways.

Liked how sassy they made Tikki in this, she had a ready-to-go attitude all the way.

They decimated my boy Plagg though….turned him into a flatulent joke 🤦‍♀️

Surprisingly, that one part at the ending with Adrien and Gabriel actually made me tear up a bit despite me not liking the dude in the slightest, but it was that hug man, that father-son hug was animated good, I felt that.

But for a movie based off the show that also kinda serves as a introduction for new viewers, to be honest it felt like still needed some work. I mean haven’t watched the show since it’s 2nd season and I could see how for some people it might be hard to follow since it feels like they’re fitting 3 seasons worth of story into a 100 minute movie.

Idk, I wasn’t expecting anything spectacular but I still didn’t feel too disappointed with it like a lot of other people have been.I’d give it a….6/10. Yeah, that’s my score honestly.