#tipsy anon

[intheorangebedroom]

saw a tweet that said pedro's frankie energy has been off the charts lately and thought of you my love 🧡 that's what you deserve!!! (🍻 i'm alive and i'll be right back muah 💋

Tipsy Anon my darling 🧡🧡🧡 I've missed you so damn much!! How have you been??

I mean.... listen... i’m not particularly fond of pap pics because of the implications but… that tweet isn't wrong 🫠 It's the curls? And the BREADTH. He just looks so SOLID. Those ARMS. @julesonrecord called him "a broad ass brick wall of sunshine" and she's a genius who deserves all the hugs for that (and many other reasons).

Also, we need to talk about Pedro Frankie at that Horror thingy, because Halloween is everything to me, but Frankie + Halloween? Yes please.

Actually you know what? Hold my beer.

*opens another Google doc*

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[hello-nichya-here]

oki wait actually I am a lil teeny bit tipsy tonight & I was gonna sleep but then I started thinking about Zucest so - hiii have a shitty semi-coherent unfinished drabble from the foggy recesses of my dead brain <3 this could be in-universe or an AU idk - a n y w a y

---

"Wait." The sound of Zuko's voice was enough to make Azula freeze. His tight grip around her wrist should have infuriated her, but instead, she was electrified.

They had been drinking a not-so-moderate amount of wine, sitting propped against the bed frame in Zuko's bed chambers and talking about the past. The soft inviting warmth of the wine had enticed them to discuss topics neither of them had dared touch over the months that they had been trying this whole reconciliation thing. Topics like their father and Azula's years alone with him. Topics like Zuko's intense jealousy and fixation on Azula's perceived perfection. Zuko spoke more than Azula did during their conversations. He had so much more to say. It was like the words spilled out of him. Like he was a broken cartridge of ink. Azula meanwhile responded with actions - like not burning this entire place to the ground - like listening when Zuko talked. She didn't have so much to say in simple conversation, but she was trying her best to show him she was trying. That had to count for something.

They had entered the early hours of the morning and Azula knew well that the logical, smart, calculated choice was to leave and return to her quarters for sleep. Zuko's grip was warm and tight around her wrist though. It was inviting in a way that Azula did not know how to place.

"Stay," Zuko said. His voice was soft.

Azula could not be certain if it was a command or a plea her brother was making of her. She hesitated. What was it, drawing her to remain here? They were both tipsy from the wine, and tired. Surely Zuko did not expect more emotional conversation - not tonight, maybe not ever. Azula wasn't sure she could stomach it.

Still, something compelled Azula to climb back beneath the covers beside her brother. "Why?" she asked, her voice soft.

Zuko responded by wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her on top of him. Azula gasped in surprise, feeling her hips crush his. He was hard, his erection pressing between her legs and making her shudder. She hadn't expected that, and she wasn't sure how to respond to it. Zuko's hands moved lower, gripping her ass with tight intensity.

"Please don't go," Zuko said. He was looking up at Azula now, his gold eyes meeting hers.

Before Azula knew it, his lips were crushed against hers. She shuddered at the surprise but leaned into it - either despite herself or because she was consumed with desire, it was impossible to discern. All Azula knew was that she had never felt fire quite like this before.

Aaaaahhhh, always a joy to see your ideas, my friend whose name I totally don't know! This was lovely! You know I can't resist Zuko being in charge 😈

[sleepipipi]

New mutual here (friend?👀) I'm a lil tipsy nut never had the confidence to say hi but maybe i am now :) I thinn you're bery sweet and I'd love to be friends maybe (thank god for autocorrect I really hope this message makes sense I can't see what I'm typing. You probably know who I am cz I've seen you like a few of my drunk posts Tonifht hehehe)

Hi mutual!😇💕💕💕💕💕 I wanna be friends too! I love new friends so so so so much!

Hehe, don't worry i get drinkies sometimes too☺️ (especially when i need a boost in confidence or if i dont have to work)

Just please remember to stay safe and drink lots of water!😇💕

[originalartblog]

skk are (disgruntled and uneven) chopsticks

(referencing this)

[lavendermin]

PLEASE MORE TIPSY JING YUAN THOUGHTS IM STARTING

please please consider Jing Yuan not being one to get tipsy at all. But it’s more of a rare occasion indulgence he’s steadily leaned into. Just one of the benefits of a large estate to share with you.

A bottle of wine or two to share as you talk about everything and nothing at all. One glass in and he’s feeling lighter, shoulders relaxing from the stresses of the week as you shower him in affections surely missed due to his busy schedule.

By the third glass there’s a fuzzy feeling and you both already started getting handsy halfway through the second glass.

cw | nsfw, suggestive, alcohol, biting, pain kink if you squint

Jing Yuan is still mostly clothed albeit a little disheveled where your roaming hands have tugged at his shirt and wandered underneath to feel his bare skin. You’re in a less proper state with an oversized shirt of his thrown on and lacy lingerie underneath—just how he wants you on a lazy evening indoors.

You’re both all giggles as his wine-stained lips can hardly keep away from any patch of your bare skin for more than ten seconds. He’s pressing wet kisses to the heated skin, tongue licking a stripe before his teeth are sinking into a soft spot. It pulls a small yelp from you, a breathy moan, but he won’t stop. If anything it fuels him to continue—in a wine-induced trance.

And you can feel him grin against your skin with each squirm as he leaves a trail of hickeys and marks along your delicate skin. It’s as if his battle-scarred hands, rough and calloused, are enamored by the softness your body retains. Lovely and soft—with ample curves for him to poke and prod.

And bite.

And it’s that third glass that has him letting loose—biting down particularly hard on the soft flesh of your thigh. In your own daze you bite back a moan, mind dizzy at the tantalizing touches contrasting the discomfort of the bite. Your eyes trail down to see the little crescent shapes of his teeth marking your thigh. No blood, only promises that he’s on a path to tear you down later.

His teeth sink into more unmarred flesh. And again. And again.

Your eyes roll to the back of your head at the discomfort confusing itself for pleasure. Perhaps he’s conditioning you to develop a pain kink. And, perhaps, you’d let him.

Lightly, you push his face away as he’s at your neck leaving new marks to bloom.

“How about I go get us more wine?”

And something… shifts as soon as your suggestion reaches him and your body moves away from him. His arms are tighter around your middle, golden eyes darker—almost a deep amber.

And his carefree smile is gone.

“You aren’t leaving. Stay.” His voice is low, steady. Commanding. It sends a shiver down your spine and electricity up every nerve ending.

It’s a feeling akin to a deer’s neck in the mouth of the lion. And for some reason (the alcohol and the very obvious sexual tension between you both right now), you love it.

Tipsy Jing Yuan is dangerously clingy in this state. Needs your skin on his as much as possible, wants to devour you whole. Longs to see you in discomfort in an achingly slow build-up, tears brimming your eyes from frustration only to be followed up with the most heart-wrenching affections. Lips on yours with the taste of wine and a quickening heartbeat beating harsh in your throat.

[popfizzles]

Mojito's father is Ol'Ethan, the pale rum who works behind the bar at the Devil's Casino.

Compared to Rumulus and Ginette, Ol'Ethan is the friendliest of the Tipsy Troop. He's kind of a bumbler, and likes to run his mouth about anything and everything, and gets even worse when he's been drinking. Mojito likes his dad a lot!! He tries to be accommodating when he can be, and will sit politely while his father talks his hypothetical ear off.

He isn't really worried about the relation his dad has to the Devil's Casino. His dad seems pretty happy, all things considered, and they don't particularly struggle with anything. It's why Mojito feels so comfortable visiting Inkwell Hell. It's not really a place of sin or preying on hardships for him. It's just a place.

And like I said before, Mojito is the last to figure out that he's bisexual (and he hasn't actually figured it out).

But I do think that Ethan would be very supportive and kind if Mojito came to the bar with a man on his arm on day, and would talk their ear off just as well. <:)

[l3viat8an]

rooo, about the bros with a sweet mc ask i send youu, i never really make an nsfw ask so this is probably the first time i did it lolol (i'm also really bad at it😭)

like..the mc is probably also a virgin too yknow yknow, they are probably too shy to initiate things with others so when they were introduce to the thing they don't really know what to do with it...so the bros teach them all about it and corrupt their mind too- AAAA this is so baddd

-🦋 anon

Nsfw content MDNI

Okayyyy so I tried to come up with something 🦋!!! But was a little lazy on this- I never know what to write for virgin stuff hdjshsjsj

Lucifer, Levi, Satan & Belphie

Fuck he’s been watching you for what feels like forever, but never going too far, never pushing more then he should.

But there’s just something about how you look, eyes wide, sweet smile and most importantly is how you look at him.

Always innocently making eyes at him, looking up and smiling whenever you see him.

Now you’re finally here. In his bed for the first time and he’s trying so hard to be gentle, using his fingers to work you open, knowing it’ll help you, after all this should be about you and your pleasure first.

Slowly bottoming out inside your tight hole.

He lives for your wines, shaky touches and those pretty tears falling from your eyes at the pleasure flooding your body….Fuck now that he has you, he won’t let you go until he’s completely corrupted you~

Mammon, Asmo & Beel

He’d never tell you that your innocence is such a huge fucking turn on for him…..he’ll be patient, so, so patient, letting you be the one to set the pace and decide how fast everything moves. He doesn’t want to rush you.

And it worked so well! Here you are and he finally has you spread out on his bed, pulling your hips to his face and burying it there, watching your face intently and even when you’re cumming all over his tongue, he doesn’t let up.

Hands pulling you closer. Maybe he can pull at least one more orgasm from you-

[lucysgraybird]

Billy taking you on a horse ride 🌞.

you have no idea how insane these blurbs make me lfggg. i hope this makes sense bc i don't actually remember learning to ride 🧍🏻‍♀️it was like 16 years ago

in this case, let’s imagine you haven’t ridden before & you’re not super comfy on a horse/with horses. billy’s been trying to get you out riding for ages and you’re always hedging around it, finding any excuse not to get on the back of a 1200 pound animal, but he does finally convince you with promises of taking it slow. he makes sure it’s the most perfect day out – no threat of storm or strong wind or really anything that could spook the horse or make you unsteady, even though he knows his horses are well-trained and won’t buck for hardly anything. the hardest part is that he really doesn’t understand being so nervous; he’s been riding for so long that he’s almost more comfortable on horseback than he is on the ground, but he’s still so careful with you. he shows you how to tack up the horse, just getting you as comfortable with it as possible before he has you get on it. when you’re ready, he boosts you up onto the horse. you make this hesitant little noise when you realize just how high up you are and he laughs a little, squeezing your calf and saying, “‘m right here, honey, you’re alright,” and it’s hard not to trust him. he shows you how to hold the reins and promises that he’s put you on a very cooperative horse, so you don’t have to worry about tugging too hard or anything. 

pretty soon, he’s deeming you good enough to start properly riding, and gets past your hesitance by saying that you’re not going to get more confident the less you ride. he mounts his horse and just rides alongside you on the plains for a while, and pretty soon he’s pushing the boundaries of what he can get you to do – “wanna try a trot, honey?” – and he seems so earnest that you can’t say no. he talks you through what to do, smirking a little when you blush at his demonstration of how to rock your hips with the movement of the horse. eventually y’all start trotting and it hurts a little but it’s so fun, the wind tearing through your hair and filling your lungs, trading spots with a loud laugh. it makes billy’s heart soar, that sound, so pleased that you’re enjoying yourself, and when you roll to a stop by his side, flushed and smiling, he’s already thinking of the next time he can take you out riding and where to bring you, just to see that look on your face again. 

[paimonial-rage]

spark - xiao

[random writing event] | requested by anonymous

“Do you want to try it?” You asked with a smile. “A day like this is a cause for celebration, don’t you think?”

He kept quiet as his gaze trailed to the thin stick within your hand. Though he never used one before, they weren’t unfamiliar to him. In times past, the more studious of the adepti found interest in those Inazuman delights. The lights would often draw his eyes from across a crowd, but he never bothered to investigate up close. While bright and beautiful, they died quickly as transient things often did.

“I’m alright. There’s no need to waste such human trivialities on me.”

As usual, his refusal didn’t color your expression with hurt. Instead, you shrugged and turned your attention back to the Mingxiao Lanterns floating in the sky.

“It wouldn’t be a waste to me. Not for you.”

He held back his urge to sigh. There you went again saying such things. Though you were assigned to his care, you didn’t need to visit him so often. You didn’t need to shower him with gifts. You didn’t need to stay by his side. He knew he wasn’t easy to be around. He knew he often made people feel nervous. But you didn’t mind. You weren’t scared away.

In the back of his mind, he wondered why Rex Lapis gave you to him. Xiao had been a loyal servant for years. Never once had he failed his duty. So he didn’t understand. What was he supposed to do with you? What was the purpose of keeping you by his side?

He broke away from his thoughts when a soft humming filled the air. Turning his attention to you, there you stood by the torchlight with that stick from earlier in hand. After lighting the tip, you held your arm out as the stick began to erupt in a burst of lights and stars. You laughed, waving it around, enjoying the streaks it made across the evening sky.

The sight was captivating.

But just as quickly as it began, it soon came to an end. With a sigh, you placed the sparkler to the side. Almost as if reading his mind, you turned to him with a bashful smile.

“They don’t last long, but they are beautiful, aren’t they? It may be a bit frivolous, but what’s the point in being alive if we don’t allow ourselves to enjoy it?”

Perhaps it was due to it being Lantern Rite that he suddenly found himself caught in a bout of honesty.

“I’m… not sure I understand.”

It was the most truthful answer he could give. And how shocking it was you did not judge him for it. Instead, you walked over to the box of sparklers and picked out a stick. With a smile, you then held it out to him.

“Why not try?”

[butmakeitgayblog]

in your canon au, say Lexa lets loose and gets drunk and extra cuddly. And she’s more vocal to Clarke about how attractive she is and how much she loves her. How does Clarke react to that seeing her be so free and be young for the first time?

Ya know... I actually think a drunk Lexa would be very mushy.

Cuddly, yes. Handsy and smoochy, yes.

I think if she ever allowed herself to be tipsy in public she'd never be anything but proper, if not a little more subdued. Sat a little lazier in her throne. Relaxed back and legs spread with that cocky air of swagger she gets about her. Probably a half grin constantly twitching juuuust at the edges of her lips. Nothing beyond that. Still entirely dignified and in command of her faculties.

But alone?

I think if Lexa allowed herself to overindulge alone in her room with Clarke, I think the more romantic and dreamy side of Lexa would come out mingled in among her normal poise of Heda. A coin constantly flipping from moment to moment. A demure and elegant smile here, a wine sodden giggle there - all bunny toothed and deliciously silly. All hazy bedroom eyes and low hung lashes dotted with warm, mushy kisses to the hinge of Clarke's jaw. Those big juicy lips stained red from berry wine constantly half pursed in drunken thought. Asking Clarke for thoughts on the clans and what she thinks of Earth, what's her favorite old world poet and ever more stories about life among the stars.

Just because, "Even when you're angry with me, I enjoy listening to you speak."

Which is... not exactly the most romantic thing a person can say, but coming from Lexa, there's always a deeper truth buried in her words. Lexa is always saying something, even when she's not saying much at all.

And it's in that understanding that moments when Lexa would do something as careless as let herself have a few drinks too many, and become more open and vocal, that would make everything she says and does hit even harder. All the thoughtless kisses and the not-so-mindless trailing of her fingers along Clarke's palm. The murmurings of how beautiful Clarke is, how sexy she is when she's... well, doing anything. Leading her people, brokering peace, eating, yawning, sleeping. When she pulls Clarke close under the furs of her bed and whispers in a kiss against Clarke's ear that she had thought she'd never get to feel this again. That after losing Costia, she'd forced herself to accept that she'd always sleep alone. That she'd forced herself to prefer it.

But she doesn't miss sleeping alone...

Because Clarke is pretty, and funny in all the ways Lexa doesn't believe that she is, and that she feels more like herself with Clarke pressed against her ribs.

And I just think Clarke would feel... strong. I think she'd feel strong in those moments. Because so much of her life is obligation and weighed down by her people and her responsibility, but this is different. Being responsible for - being trusted to protect and care for - a drunkly handsy and romantically attentive Lexa isn't complicated. Not when she's honest with herself. It's not another obligation. It's getting to be with Lexa when she's vulnerable, when she's just being Lexa. It's getting to hear how that complex brain of hers works, and all those inner thoughts being as close to unfiltered as Lexa ever gets. I mean what can she do when those big doe eyes are blinking at her from half a pillow away as Lexa whispers that she didn't know love could feel like this?

What can she do other than fall for her harder?

[intheorangebedroom]

just watched past lives and i can't see straight to write this but i needed to come thank you again for chosing to change the ending (i did not read it yet 🥹 but i will finally have loads of time these next days to give it the read it deserves) anyways sorry for the spoiler..ish? kidding i regret nothing. sending you love e um abraço apertado 🧡 🍻

Tipsy my love I HAVE MISSED YOU SO FUCKING MUCH 🥺🫂🧡🧡🧡

How are you? How have you been? I wanna know everythingggggg 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻 how’s the winter how’s the ginger how’s the business how’s your mother YOU DON’T KNOW HOW MUCH I’VE MISSED YOU.

And now you’re coming back to tell me there’s a beautiful sad love story stretching over decades in the shape and form of a movie designed to ruin me…????? MY CRACK 😱😱😱

Ok so I’ve checked, the movie’s coming out in France on December 13th, and I can’t wait to see it so we can discuss it.

I hate to think that you’re sad but I love that you felt all the feelings with this movie. ✨Catharsis✨ Ain’t that the shit?

And you know what? I don’t regret changing it 😉

Des océans d’amour 🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡

[oifaaa]

do you read the comics or just fanon stuff? genuine question, i'm sorry if you've mentioned it before, i was finding it hard to tell from your blog and thought i'd ask

you dont understand how funny this question is to me and I'll answer it... tomorrow first I wanna get the general consensus

[princessbrunette]

omg I stumbled across your blog and immediately fell in love with it <333 do you think anakin prefers ass, tits, or thighs??

omg ily !!!!! 🤍

good question !!! honestly this is such a ‘non answer’ but all. anakin is such a touchy person that if you asked him, his brain would probably explode because he adores all of them.

anakin loves ass because there’s nothing quite like watching the recoil of your ass when he passes you in the temple, his head swivelling to check if there’s any lingering eyes before giving it a little slap and grab, looking away from you nonchalantly like he has no idea what he’s doing. he can’t keep his hands off it in doggy style when it’s slapping against his thighs, jiggling obscenely, just absolutely at the mercy of his long grabby fingers. yeah, he loves ass.

but anakin loves tits too because they’re so fucking distracting. they’re warm, and comforting, and so damn grab-able that he’s honestly stopped trying to resist the urge. washing the dishes in your coruscant apartment? best believe he’s sliding up behind you, pressing his sleepy warm morning body against your back, kisses dotting along your neck with his hands sliding up your shirt just to cup them, callous thumb stroking over your hardened nipple. not to mention, the man cannot hold a simple conversation with you without his eyes slowly and not so subtly drifting down to your cleavage, sometimes forgetting what he was about to say all together.

oh but thighs. anakin loves thighs. a hand will always be resting on your thigh when he’s steering his speeder, eyes on the traffic ahead of him, navigating through the sky, his thumb absentmindedly stroking patterns into you. it’s such a thoughtless move, but turns you on to no end. anakin is a simple man, he sees his lover in thigh high socks and his brain short circuits and he has to resist the caveman-like urge to grab and bite. needless to mention, to anakin — there’s nothing quite like pushing your thighs up against your chest whilst he fucks you into the bed.

so yeah, in short — the answer is all of them. anakin loves all of them.

[popfizzles]

I think the best contenders for doing it right would be (ironically) the Tipsy Troop! They're all cups, so they'd probably know the most about fixing cracks and shatters. Plus, I'm sure they'd have SOMETHING laying around the bar that would work as a safe filling. So long as they can keep their hands steady long enough...

Rumulus would be the most "tough love" out of the three of them, calling them names and berating them but ultimately helping in the end. Ginette would be very short with them, but she'd have a more gentle touch. And then Ol' Ethan would be the kindest. :) I think he'd have a soft spot for Rummer and Tumbler. They remind him of his son.

so, take a shot of whiskey to numb the pain before we reattach your arm, got it?

[unexpectedbrickattack]

Now hold on a gosh-diddly-darn minute, I noticed the entire time talking about a tipsy Peppino no one thought to ask this but what about tipsy GUS? I mean we saw him a li'l tipsy in the fastfood saloon escape, can I hear your thoughts about that/him please? Have they ever gotten tipsy together?

(I just like the mental image of the two alone, just being real giggly with each other (Gus just says "hey" and Peppi starts giggling which sets Gus off giggling) and being sappy goofs with each other <3)

HEEHEE u are so right and i am so sorry for withholding this information from the masses 😭

My homebrew for gnomes is that they are simultaneously hardy folk (able to eat virtually anything and immune to most poisonous creatures) AND extremely intolerant of alcohol. Theres no reason for that, i just like it alot :)

So Gus would be an extreme lightweight 😭 its SO bad; he cant speak clearly at all, he cant walk straight, he has the Worst hangovers and he wont remember anything from the previous night. The line between ‘pleasantly buzzed’ and ‘blackout drunk’ is so thin that Gus doesnt even try social drinking. If he MUST drink, it will be in the comfort of his own barebones apartment 😭 at least, until Peppino started hanging out with vigilante and his crew.

Gustavo LIKES drinking! Its just hard to find a good balance, and THATS bc he simply doesnt know how alcohol works. Peppino is like:

“Look ‘ere. All of these have a number somewhere on the bottle. Or a percentage. Lower the number, the better it is for you.”

Gustavo is like !!! Oh!!! That is very helpful! What would you recommend for me then?

“Probably…2-5%. 5-10 proof. Small 'a numbers.”

Gustavo nods, interested. He points at a bottle he recognizes from the last time he came here and got shitfaced. “That one up there; do you know how ‘a strong that one is? Or should i ask the bartender?”

Peppino squints at the company label. “45%.”

“Oh!” That makes sense. “Well what do you usually drink?”

“70%.”

“Oh!”

Peppino recommends some of the LIGHT light wines, the ones that barely have a hint of anything. Theyre sweet (which Gustavo loves so very very much) and for the first time in a very long time, he Stays buzzed instead of immediately faceplanting into being blackout drunk.

Hes very. Playful. Is what Peppino would describe a tipsy Gustavo. He hesitates to use the term ‘flirty’ because that is not whats happening. But hes like. Clearly entertaining some gruff looking men like five times his size as they ramble drunkenly about random shit like ‘waow….thasso cool…and then what happened???’

Its funny at first bc Gustavo is so fucking TINY that all you can see of him, in the group of men as they yapyapyap about some inane shit that Gustavo wont even remember, is his tiny little tail 😭 It is less funny, however, when Peppino catches himself rambling about work and Gustavo is like (ears perked; tail swaying) ‘mmhmm. wrow…thats ‘a kinda nice…what else did you do??’ Peppino is like *buffering* (‘something is happening right now that will need to be addressed at a later time. Do not forget DO NOT FORGET. URGENT!!!!’)

Otherwise Gustavo is just a silly guy. Vigilante will make a joke and he laughs so low and deep that he sounds downright villainous 😭 Peppino will point out something stupid on the TV and like hours later Gus is like ‘…heeeuehuuueee…..do u remember [insert stupid reference] and Peppino will giggle. Peppinos affinity for throwing around ilus are met with Gustavo going ‘😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊’ with absolutely no way to even pretend to mask it.

Gustavo has fun being out in the saloon but he really enjoys drinking in Peppinos house. Its not nearly as loud as the saloon and theres usually homecooked foods like breads and soups (Because Peppino stress-cooks ALL the time). Brick gets to stay indoors instead of waiting outside the saloon, so Gustavo gets to mess with his soft fur contentedly. He just gets to be cozy; its quite nice 😊

[mariatesstruther]

okay just hear me out modern au where tommy ends up picking up ellie from pre school almost everyday since joel is busy but he keeps meeting teacher maria

okay bestie as a preschool teacher you GOT me with this one. like you got me SO GOOD. this might actually get published to ao3, you got me soooo fuckin’ good right now. i have so many unnecessary details for such a simple plot so here’s a cut

tbh i feel like even as busy as joel is, he’d prioritize picking up and dropping of sarah as much as he can, so maybe he and tommy would alternate???? so on days when tommy drops off, joel picks up and when joel drops off, tommy picks up. sarah goes to a public preschool with a lot of kids, so she gets easily overwhelmed and sometimes needs extra cuddles or kind words in the mornings to make it out of the car.

one monday, a couple months into school, sarah is particularly VERY anxious because there’s a new teacher to replace ms. doherty, who quit unexpectedly on friday “because she said we gave her alooooottt of headaches, daddy.” now, sarah knows nothing about the new teacher except that shes a girl from a place called new york—and sarah doesn’t even know what new yawk IS like, thats So Far Away??? (“it’s not really that far, baby,” joel says to her. “and it’s new york. with an o sound.”) still, sarah is VERY concerned:

is new yawk like another planet???? (no, babygirl.) but what if she’s an alien???? (the school only hires human teachers, baby. they promised.) but what if she’s a SECRET alien??? (she won’t be, i promise.) okay but what if she’s mean???? (if she is, you tell me or tommy and we’ll talk to her about it, okay? she shouldn’t be mean to you.) what if she doesn’t play good music at quiet time???? (you can ask her nicely and i bet she will, baby. just say please and thank you, okay?)

still, even with her questions answered, sarah is very nervous on monday. both joel and tommy go with her in an effort to start her day off extra good, especially because joel can’t pick her up. they reassure her that new york has plenty of nice people and her new teacher will probably be one of them. she also gets TWO WHOLE extra minutes of cuddle time with BOTH of them before she and daddy have to leave the car—it’s half for her and half for them, because they’re honestly pretty anxious for her to like her new teacher too

joel is the one to hold sarah’s hand and walk her inside, because the school prefers only one guardian to drop off at a time. tommy’s nervous, but joel actually seems pretty pleased when he gets back to the car with no sarah in tow. surprisingly, he’s back faster than any time they’ve ever dropped sarah off before. with a proud smile, he tells tommy is that miss maria seems really nice. more importantly, she’s Black, which joel says Sarah got really excited about. tommy pries for more details, and he’s glad he does: apparently miss maria has locs, a few even blue and purple, and the first thing sarah’d said to her was an emphatic “😲😍🤩 i like your hair!!!!!!!!,” to which she had responded “thank you! i like your hair! what’s your name, sweets?” and that’d been that

later, when tommy does pickup that day, he doesn’t know what to expect. most times at the end of the day, sarah is super reserved and a bit cranky, eager to get home to finally have time to herself. tommy’s goal is usually to try and get her to at least wave goodbye to her teachers like joel asks—but, more often than not, she opts for reaching for uppies and hiding her face in his chest until they leave.

today??? no. it takes sarah a full two minutes to even notice tommy’s there because her and this drop-dead-fucking-gorgeous woman in a soft-looking lavender pants and blouse set are finishing up a painting at the easel wall. they’re working on what looks like a brown and purple butterfly, probably the most carefully shaped sarah’s ever made.

tommy’s heart stops when this goddess miss maria finally looks over at him and smiles with perfect pearly-whites, waving him over behind sarah’s back. when she says “sarah honey, i think someone’s here for you!” in her sing-songy toddler-tone, tommy swears an angel gets his wings. sarah turns around, shrieks with joy upon seeing him, and runs down to him with her arms out, yelling all the while: “THOMMYYYYYYY!!!!!”—because sarah’s still working on her hard ts—“thommy!!!! thommy thommy thommy come look!!! i made a butterfly for u!!!!! look!!!!! it matches ms. maria!!!!!! it’s gorgeous!!!!” (she’s been obsessed with calling things gorgeous ever since she heard tommy say it about a harley motorbike last week. joel especially thinks it’s cute, especially because of how she over-emphasizes the j-sound: gor-Jus.)

tommy’s never seen her so excited to show her art off at pickup-time before; usually, she waits until they’re home and she’s feeling less shy to start showing off, but she’s babbling and pointing to it as he picks her up and sets her on his hip: “it’s brown and purple like miss maria!!! isnt it so gorgeous, unca thommy??? do you like it???? aren’t they SO gorgeous????”

and now miss maria is looking at him. and he’s looking at her. tommy knows he’s blushing, and he hesitates—which sarah does NOT appreciate, so she says: “unca tommy!!!!!!! don’t be WUDE! thell miss maria she’s gorgeous!!! she is!!!”

luckily, miss maria saves him by explaining, in a slightly firmer teaching voice: “sarah sweets, that’s okay! we’re only just meeting, and that’s not really something you say to a stranger, okay?”

“but why noooooooot?? you are gorgeous! like my butterfly! isn’t she so gorgeous, thommy?”

“well, yeah, of course,” tommy agrees easily, because she obviously is—and shit. now miss maria is looking at him like he’s a fucking bonehead, because he obviously fucking is. “but—uh, i mean—she’s right, hon’. you gotta listen to your teacher, and that’s not somethin’ you say to a stranger, okay?”

but then, after thinking to her tiny self for a few seconds: “well if she stays my teacher then she’s not a stranger, is she???” sarah asks tommy, then turns her conniving little head towards maria, too. “and you said you’d stay! so can he say you’re gorgeous tomorrow?” then, without waiting for an answer, she’s back towards tommy to finish: “i think you should call her gorgeous tomorrow.”

“i think we should go home, s’what i think,” tommy says, finally deciding to save himself from four-year-old torment. he sets sarah down and pats her on the end with a gentle but firm request to go get her stuff from her cubby, which she goes to do without her complaints of being too tired to walk. maria watches them closely with a close-lipped but relaxed grin. when sarah’s out of earshot, he apologizes. “sorry ‘bout that, ma’am.”

“don’t be,” miss maria teases, crossing her arms. “you did call me gorgeous, after all. i’ve had worse introductions.”

“tommy miller,” he offers, moving to shake her hand. he notices her nails are done-up, a sparkly blend of pretty shades of purple that look tie-dyed on somehow. her hands aren’t soft, not really, but they’re smooth enough to make him shiver as he pulls away. “sarah’s uncle.”

“oh, i know,” she reassures, then nods her head pointedly towards sarah. the little one is coming back towards them with her lunchbox in one hand and her water bottle in the other, walking extra careful so she doesn’t trip over herself like she did last week, tommy guesses. clearly fond, maria continues. “she spent all day telling me about you and her daddy. you’re doing great with her.”

“unca thommy! i’m ready to go!” sarah sing-songs, interrupting whatever miss maria might’ve said next. internally, tommy thanks his niece—the you’re doing great was already enough to make him cry, and he’d rather not do so in front of either her or her amazing new teacher. plopping her lunch and bottle at tommy’s feet, sarah gives not one, but two eager waves to miss maria, hands flapping madly up towards the woman’s face. “bye miss mariaaaaa!!!! i’ll see you tomorrow!!!!”

“bye sarah sweets!” maria says back, waving just as enthusiastically. to tommy, she raises an amused, teasing eyebrow. just loud enough for him to hear as he turns away, he hears her say “bye, gorgeous,” and laugh, giving yet another angel a pair of wings.

it takes everything in him to not fall straight to the floor, toppling his own precious niece, right then. he doesn’t think he even breathes until both he and Sarah are secured in the car, him in the front and her in her carseat. she’s already babble singing mary j. blige’s “just fine,” which they usually play and sing on their way home from school to help her regulate. when he plays the song this time, sarah smiles bright at him through the rearview and says “i already feel just fine, unca tommy!!! but can we still play it, just for fun?”

“of course, baby,” he says, and start singing along with her. he’s feeling just fine, too.

🫶🏾🫶🏾🫶🏾🫶🏾🫶🏾🫶🏾🫶🏾

tagging some homies (btw just let me know if u wanna be tagged in this kinda stuff or not guys! im never sure lol): @becomethesun @clickergossip @boilingcowboy @bumblepony