#today was definitely more barbie playing day than actual playing day

[corneliushickey]

how long have you been growing out your hair? looks gorgeous! planning to grow out my own but i keep foiling it with trims because of split ends

unbelievable to me that i opened my tumblr app to see a kind stranger asking about the only thing in the world that actually matters to me: how long my hair is.

i'm going to give you a needlessly detailed response but if you don't wanna read all that: 7 years 8 months and it (as of today!) brushes my tailbone

i grew my hair out as long as i could in high school and it got to almost my waist. i shaved it all off in summer 2013 and started growing it out from a buzzcut in summer 2014

when it reached the ugly soccer mom bob stage i got an undercut from ear to ear around the back of my head/nape of my neck, like this:

random pic off pinterest btw idk who that is

i shaved that undercut for the last time in very late december 2016 and kept my hair at shoulder length for a while waiting for the undercut to catch up

so basically since jan. 1 2017 i have been growing out my hair from bald 👨‍🦲

in 2022 i shaved the sides from my ear forward like this

very skrillex. i loved it. i had been day dreaming about this kind of sideshave for well over a decade. at this point my hair was just past my waist.

then in 2023 i extended the side shave all the way to the nape of my neck again like a death hawk. like this:

the last time i got that sideshave touched up was 12.29.24 so it's been growing out for 7 months 12 days

i do not plan to cut the rest of my hair short to match the sideshave until it reaches like... actually idk probably my waist? but the thought of having to chop my hair back to my waist makes my entire body clench painfully so maybe not who's to say

my hair grows extremely slowly. more slowly than anyone i've ever met, actually. most people in 7 years can grow their hair down to classic length (the bottom of your butt/top of your thighs) or even longer.

i think trims can be very helpful if your hair grows quickly, if you have a lot of split ends, or if you have bleached hair. actually if you have bleached hair trims are mandatory and unavoidable. for me, i prefer to do "seek and destroy" haircuts where i just bought myself a pair of sheers and i snip off the individual split ends i find whenever i find them. is this foolproof? no definitely not. will any hairstylist tell you that trims are necessary? yes. and they probably know what they're talking about. for me, my hair grows so slowly and i want it to be long so badly that idc about splits. if i noticed my ends THINNING i would get them trimmed for sure, but otherwise i am really reluctant to let anyone cut my hair.

i had a reliable stylist who i went to for years and i trusted her to give me barbie princess layers and not take any length off. she moved out of state and i'm thrilled for her but i cannot imagine trusting a stranger with my hair. especially since the last time i did so (in july 2023) i ended up having to chop 6" off my hair because she thinned out the ends so much. SIX INCHES. that's like over 2 years of growth for me.

what i really want rn is a little itty bitty undercut around my ears like this (but with no bangs):

and with how fucking annoying my grown out sideshave is i have literally been parting my hair to do this 3-4 times a week. but i am NOT allowed to get another undercut until i grow this one out for a full year 😤 which is a rule i made up for myself because otherwise i would immediately lose the will to keep at it and just do the skrillex thing again.

also if you happen to be here from my asoiaf sideblog i can tell you that i do still play the game where every time a character's hair length is mentioned i compare it to my own hair. the two people who have me beat are khal drogo (his hair in an intricate multi strand braid reaches his thighs) and aeron greyjoy i think altho i might be misremembering aeron.

TY FOR YOUR QUESTION THERE IS NO WAY YOU WANTED THIS MUCH INFORMATION XO MWAH

[starquestingfordrarry]

Thank you thank you for the tag @lqtraintracks <3

three ships: Listen, it's just Drarry for me I'm too tired for more than that (but I do think about eruri a lot)

first ship: definitely Danny Phantom and whoever I was feeling at the time (usually Sam)

last song: 10 hours of rainy skyrim ambient music

last movie: Barbie

currently reading: A Night in the Lonesome October by Roger Zelazny

last thing i wrote: It's a secret. Everything I write is a secret. Someday I'll stop signing up for fests but today is not that day.

currently writing: I just finished my Career Fair, so I'm actually totally FREE I'm so excited I will probably do a fun little sudsfest next

Are you named after anyone: Nope

Favorite subject in school: English

Do you have kids: I have cats

When was the last time you cried: Probably when I had a migraine a few days ago :(

Do you use sarcasm a lot: not as much you'd think

What sports do you play/have played: Many a moon ago I played fieldhockey

What's the first thing you notice about people: usually if I would want to be friends - I don't know exactly what it is I'm noticing, but I will sit there longingly in the coffee shop and think "wow I bet they're cool I hope they talk to me" (reader: they don't)

Any special talents: I can worry about anything.

Where were you born: the north east of the us

What are your hobbies: reading and video gaems and making art (but not as often as I'd like) and writing

How tall are you: 5 feet

Dream job: I'm tired of the capitalist narrative that work is how to be happy - I just want enough time and energy to do the things that make me happy (but also I have wanted to be an author since I was like 10, so I guess that) I tag @drarrymyheart and @arminaa8 and @ghostofnoir and @stavromulabetaaa and @uncannycerulean

[blondrichclosetwitch]

In the end, this is the truth

We just need to pick a restaurant

I wake in the morning, another appointment, I hope the psychologist listenin'

I fear you will attack me soon

All I wanna tell you is now you'll never ever have to compromise

“Well, it ain't that Barbie doll.”

(I heard the news today, oh boy)

I slip and I fall and I die

If you liked it then you shoulda put a ring on it

If you see my reflection in the snow-covered hills, know the beekeeper is tapping you on the shoulder, telling you it’s time

you said that it would last, but I guess we enrolled in 1984

Well, I've been haunted in my sleep; you've been starring in my dreams

Lights, camera, acción: I'll do it on my own

And do you wanna go back home?

But she don’t know that daddy got plans

A migraine headache that just won’t go away

Listen to the girl as she takes on half the world

I’ve learned all I know by the age of 9

And hey, worry turns to murder= fisherman’s tale

Secret stash, heavy bread, baddest bitches in the bed: I'm your pusherman

In ten minutes I'll be late for the door

I hope to see him someday soon

All these people think love’s for show

I’m sure you’re not protected

Two friends and two true lovers

We are programmed to receive*

And when I think of it, my fingers turn to fists

I never did anything to you, man

Why did it seem so difficult to realise a simple truth?

The answer was here all the time, you see.

Just how i missed it is a mystery to me.

I have waited and waited for this day to arrive.

The revolution was televised.

Now it's over, bye bye.

The fear is over. Men are over. Women are over.

Prayer cycle

Breakdown on the shoreline

Before work I must rehearse

I couldn’t love you more

I know they're watching

All the commotion

The kiddie-like play has people talking

They're talking

Your sex is on fire ( I find it hysterical that this is my sotd, and that the subtitles are the tower& the absolute psycho version when really we’re talking about people watching me masturbate (unknowingly) on a webcam, ahhhh those were the days)

Tell me for my sanity how do I get out of here

You're the right kind of sinner to release my inner fantasy

Yeah, find your love and treat him nice

German tangerine (tangerine story, anybody not know it? Oh just ask maggie she came up with it, never mind that she abused my mother’s belief in miracles/grief, surely this is why the teenager has her on the brain, who else do you think named 8:03 oh, she’s bad)

Well you can tie me to the bed/well you can shoot me in the leg (girls, did you know two of your storylines were in a nickel back song? Shot in the leg in September/ tied to the bed for 12 days in May.)

Drummer

Brick butterfly had a history of sleeping with the kitchen staff

Superbad!

“It’s written all over your face.”

Bring your Alibis. (Now I’m of the personal belief that when something plays 3x in a day, spirit/God/the Universe is definitely trying to to slam something down your throat for a very special reason, so don’t say they didn’t warn you.)

Some other ocean at her feet

That disappearing horizon brings cold comfort to my soul

TREASON (duh—“let me put on a show.”)

Ok well let’s start here:

Who? Lisa, a great hoodoo master who was besties with the TR

Where: online jan-April 2016

What? We got assigned as “partners” in project 40 at the TR’s suggestion.

Why: all I know is I have a tape from spring 2017 where I was told the whole thing was a set-up & Chloe was doing rituals with the TR to make me lose my mind the year before. Shall I transcribe that next?

How: all I know is my mind started to breakdown, and I had to leave the program. I even left New York. And I told Sherene that the only person I would talk to was the Tarot Reader.

I never recovered after that. I cracked nonstop for months. (I’ve actually been listening to tapes from that Lisa time, and they are def disturbing)

All the stuff they tell you about in the movies

But this isn't chocolate boxes and roses

It's dirtier than that

You count the centuries, I blink my eyes

Your town is very famous for the little girl whose crying can be heard all around the world

You are forgiven

Lost in time

Your servants

We protect our little fictions like it’s all we are

You get down, real low down

You listen to Coltrane, derail your own train

Well, who hasn't been there before?

Rhiannon

I felt you so much today

I tell you that I’ll always want you near

You made a first-class fool out of me

Careful when you're tellin' us about obsessions

Also: maggie may played twice and Maggie’s farm played once yesterday. 3 times for a 3.

[britcision]

Today feels like a good day for this

So there’s two main ways of playing your ttrpg characters that I’ve seen from my players and other people telling me about their games

1) protagonist - you want to be the main character. The most important, impressive one in the room, with all the good rolls and everything works all the time

Weirdly, I have also only seen this from the edgelords? And it’s definitely not a hard rule, but it’s a firm trend. So they also have to be the most tragic, with the angiest backstory, the biggest victims of every wrong but oh they’re never affected by it

They’re not scared of anything, they’ve always seen worse, they never show their real feelings and they’re always in total control

This can soooort of work? If you are playing the right game, with the right people? But it is inherently uncollaborative because one person can’t lead every scene all the time, and when the rolls don’t match the inner narrative people tend to get upset

It feels more personal when something doesn’t work out because your story becomes personal wish fulfilment, and it feels like you have failed rather than just an unlucky roll

2) feral toddler with barbies - your character is your sweet little bean and you Want To Fuck Them Up

This is the fandom whump style, putting the horse in the plinko machine, and every single time something bad happens it is a wonderful opportunity to mess up your baby

This is much less focused on the end result and much more focused on having the most fun in the journey, which tends to work really really well in bigger groups where crime can be committed

Other players have other barbies and you tell stories by smashing them together, making them kiss or fight or commit tax fraud, and sometimes one of the barbie’s heads flies off to a far corner and you need to improvise

Now, these are two ends of a spectrum, and neither of them have anything to do with the characters, the game, or the story being told

It’s about how you react to the little moments, to the pieces controlled by chance, or to when something doesn’t go the way you expected it to

You don’t control which one you start with, although newer players might find themselves leaning towards “protagonist”, especially if they play a lot of games or video games with a single Player Character

It’s familiar, it’s what we’re used to in single player, and it’s really fun for character creation to invent this super cool person you’re gonna run around and fight dragons (or space robots) with…

But it’s also more stressful in a multiplayer game where there is always more than one protagonist

Ensemble stories are hard (and trust me I write them enough to know). Not everyone is in every scene, and time is limited so you have to work together and give each other prompts to get the stories you want out

It’s still really important to pay attention to scenes your character isn’t in, and to remember that… yeah, you can ping another player out of game to say “hey ask about my Tragic Backstory/Cool Weapon/Long Lost Sibling”

And they can also tell you what to ask about to get to the cool bits of their character’s lore, which is Just As Good As Doing Yours! Everyone gets to be cool together!

It’s actually something we’ve butted up against as a full game of newbies a lot; people want to be asked about something, but in a natural way, so they can’t mention in game that they want to be asked. And of course, the dreaded “my character would never talk about this”

(They’d never want to, my darling. You, their player, both want to and Can Make Them by having fellow players or the dm apply stressors)

Or they focus on wanting their story told, and if someone else comes in with “oh I get it I also had a little brother” or “shit you also heard about that evil wizard? This is what I know” it feels like losing control of the scene

But it’s a multiplayer game. The scene’s still about you even if it’s not only about you, and if you find yourself playing in the protagonist style and getting frustrated… maybe what you actually want to do is write the story of this cool character

Writing is hard but you control the environment, the outcomes, and your special character is the center of the narrative in a way that doesn’t work for a multiplayer game

If you’re playing the game and getting frustrated a lot and writing doesn’t appeal, it might be time to look at your character through the fandom lens

Put them in silly situations for fun and profit

Make them uncomfortable and remember that the important thing isn’t what your character wants. It’s what you want

We don’t rotate the blorbo in our heads because it’s what the blorbo wants; if you love whumpy fan content, whump your heckin’ character

If you want to talk about something the character never would, fucking make them. Put them in a vulnerable spot and poke their weak points until it all comes spilling out

Because… yeah. There’s a line where “being in character” can very easily translate to “doing what the character wants to do”, and there is one critical problem when that line blurs:

If you always back away and close off from the parts of the story your character wouldn’t want to talk about, you don’t get to talk about those parts of the story

Because woe of woes, your fellow players might respect those boundaries! They might see that you’re backing away and assume it’s because you the player don’t wanna go there!

But you do, so bad, and it’s so hard to see how to break that cycle without breaking character once you’re inside

You need to open the doors that’ll put your character in the place they don’t want to be, but gets you those delicious vulnerable tragic scenes that lead to the real bonding

You will not roll the perfect crit every time for the perfect story, so the sooner you lean in the more fun failure is and the more you can work out your ideal balance of “well I rolled a one at intimidation and normally I’m very scary, but I guess I put my fist down on the table right in a blob of ketchup”

My earliest rule for our game was “I am not going to railroad your characters. You need to decide why they’re staying with the party because I will not force them to if they don’t want to, and you can roll a new one”

Cuz that’s the whole point: player agency matters so much more than character agency. It’s your character. You are their fandom baseline.

And you’re the one making the canon, so you can put everything you’ve ever wanted in it

Make that dramatic and edgy character who wants to be the center of attention, and then you the player subvert it to watch them flail

Make that stern and taciturn character who’s Hardened and Doesn’t Make Friends and then conspire with fellow party members for tiny scenes like them being handed a flower and staring at it for a minute, then keeping it

Make the silly, happy go lucky flirty character, and then wind them up until they crack and all the top secret Hidden Lore comes pouring out

Do bad things to your characters for fun and profit my loves

You aren’t the character, you’re the story teller, so work with everyone to tell the story you’ve always dreamed of

[oathena11-writes]

Thursday thoughts

Today I'm thinking about relationships especially when it comes to Jedi.

I'm thinking about my complicated relationship with relationships. With romance.

After all, I am AroAce. But I'm married with two kids. I don't understand romance. I don't understand why people wouldn't want romance- it's just a deeper friendship, right? (Apparently not? No, no explanations please, I'm just sharing my thoughts today, I respect everyone's views, and I've seen a lot of explanations over the years)

Growing up, I saw all sorts of relationships in my real life. My parents divorced when I was five. My aunt divorced when I was a teen. My grandparents were still happily married, and still are to this day, I believe they're past 40 years of marriage at this point and in their eighties. They were the best example of a relationship for me.

I guess I never really thought about how relationships worked. I just saw my grandparents and said "I want that". I wanted a best friend, someone who understood me and accepted me when they did not. I wanted one person I could always reliably come home to, one person that I could laugh and have fun with. I wanted someone I didn't have to pretend around, someone I could cuddle and share everything without worry. Sure, I wanted more than one person, but I wanted there to be one person I could have above all else.

And that's how I've always approached romance in my life. Starting with playing pretend with barbies, and eventually into my years writing fanfiction. 

I realize now that everything I wanted (and now have in my spouse) is not necessarily romance, though it is present in all healthy relationships I know. 

I still approach relationships this way. Not necessarily having lives revolve around each other (my grandparents spent most of their days doing their own things despite retirement), but one person who at the end of the day they know is at their side.

So when I ship Jedi? That's the approach I take. Of course, there are canonical reasons there can't be romance. 

I'm not sure I reliably write romance, despite shipping characters. 

I'm not sure what I'm really doing with these characters, honestly. 

But this weird complicated feelings around romance and therefore shipping makes it strange to read pro Jedi posts that say Jedi can't be in relationships for x reasons.

(Do not get me started about statements about marriage that are definitely false as a married person; five years married here!) 

It actually sometimes is hurtful, as those who are aro but a different flavor of aro act like shipping characters like the Jedi are wrong because they can't be in relationships for x reasons. It's hurtful to see it be because they're ace and they're tired of everyone having to be in a relationship. 

Because I am also AroAce... and this implies my experience shouldn't exist. It's a me problem, certainly, and I'm not saying they should stop. Their thoughts and feelings are totally valid. I just wish I wasn't so weird sometimes so I could actually have the 'real' experience and not feel so left out. 

I like shipping Jedi. I like giving them people they absolutely can rely on, while they still have their family when things go wrong. So they don't have to have only the one person. But it's still nice to have that person at the end of the day, the one person that just gets them.

These are just my thoughts though. Everyone's totally good to have any of their own hcs and ships. I just was thinking and could not get this off of my mind today. So yeah, here's my thoughts on this weird tangle of issues.

[nic-spit]

UPDATED (‼️) 10/23 HORROR MOVIES WATCHED 2K22

‼️ Disclaimer ‼️ these are half baked opinions that, in the end, do not really matter, and have no effect nor hold any judgement on if you enjoyed/did not enjoy the same movies. I have no critical thinking skills and the number rankings are frivolous at best. YMMV. Have a good day. I love you drink some water. Be cool.

TO BE UPDATED

SPOILERS AHEAD

COMEDY-HORROR

Not everyone enjoys the hack n slash and brutality of other horror types so let's start with some lighter movies for those folks:

HOLLYBLOOD (Netflix) - 7/10

Spanish (dubbed) Twilight parody turned very very very light thriller. Literally, Hollyblood is the in-universe name for a Twilight movie. Has the most supportive dad to exist. "He's confused but he's got the spirit" in human form. CGI is minimal and cheesy, practical effects are cheesy and silly as hell. A good time. Desperate teen love, and nuns. Guys wearing eyeliner. A+

‼️ GIRLS WITH BALLS (Netflix) - 7/10

Who hasn't wanted to hunt volleyball players in the woods? As silly as it is creepy. Moral of the story: don't let old men lick your face. Has a minstrel.

THE BABYSITTER (Netflix) - 9/10

Always a sucker for an Evil Barbie. Has some of the most bloodthirsty teenagers in it who can also be wholesomely supportive of the kid they're trying to kill. Found Family in reverse. So much blood and a good amount of gore. Loses a point for the kid wanting to be a cop tho.

MY BEST FRIENDS EXORCISM (Amazon) - 10/10

Trauma and backstabbing everywhere, just like real highschool. Adults not caring about their teenage daughters, just like real highschool!! Bash from GLOW teaching kids about lifting weights for Jesus!! Just like real highschool!!!! For real tho the 4 main characters are all pretty insufferable in a realistic way and the more horror the movie turns the less i think Bash from GLOW was told it was a horror movie and not a straight comedy.

CLASSIC HORROR/THRILLER

Blood n gore and monsters and sometimes magic:

THE PRIVILEGE (Netflix) - 0/10

Idk what the fuck even happened in this movie. Nothing happened and nothing mattered. Don't ask too many questions cuz they won't answer them. Maybe ghosts? Maybe demons? What was with the old lady?

BLAIR WITCH (2016) (Netflix) - 0/10

Why did we watch this we hate found footage this made no sense IF EVERYONE DIED WHO FOUND THE FOOTAGE

‼️ THE INFLUENCE (Netflix) - 1/10

Pros: a couple cool visuals, strong lighting motifs

Cons: NOTHING IN THIS STORY MADE SENSE WHY DID ANY OF THIS HAPPEN HOW DID ANY OF THIS HAPPEN NOTHING WAS COHERENT

‼️ THE BOY 2 (Netflix) - 2/10

Definitely worse than the first. Took something that was creepy in it's own right and turned it into a cheesy supernatural flick.

‼️ BLAIR WITCH PROJECT (1999) (Hulu) - 2/10

GOD I JUST REALLY HATE FOUND FOOTAGE literally NOTHING happened but weird sounds, getting turned around, and teeth in a bundle of sticks. Only gets two points because the main character lady's fear did feel real to me. She carried that movie, cuz it's not like there was ever actually a witch to do anything lol. Liked the original more than the remake only because it felt less 'produced'. If i didn't have the internet i could possibly believe this was three kids fucking around in the woods. The new one? Lol no.

Note: i can see tho how with the marketing when this movie came out people would be freaked out by it, but by today's standards it's...weak.

NO ONE SLEEPS IN THE WOODS TONIGHT (Netflix) - 4/10

A Polish (dubbed) kids-at-camp type movie.  Mostly disappointed in how the fact they were at a tech-addiction camp never came into play outside of not having phones, and a lot of the deaths felt anticlimactic. Also aliens? Not much CGI use and one or two of the practical moments was cool. Gain points for hilarious mannequin head toss and Jurek's death scene.

‼️ THE BOY (Netflix) - 5/10

Never thought I'd be absolutely viscerally disgusted by someone saying the word 'kiss' but hey this movie did it

‼️ A CLASSIC HORROR MOVIE (Netflix) - 6/10

I wanted this to be good, after learning the twist. I really did. Loved the premise, but for some reason it just felt sloppy. Coulda been really good if it had pushed a bit further. Will gladly rewatch.

THERE'S SOMEONE INSIDE YOUR HOUSE (Netflix) - 7/10

All the gays live. The killer is not who you'd probably expect but exactly who it should be. Kids trying to survive high school. The killers motives made no sense after the first two murders.

‼️ THE WRETCHED (Netflix) - 7/10

This was genuinely a solid movie. Plot was cliche but they worked with it really well! Actually enjoyed watching it and not just making fun of it! THE DOG LIVES

ELI (Netflix) - 7/10

Not really a horror movie? Nothing scary in it but some predictable jump scares. Cool movie anyway tho. Netflix is lying about the 'heart-stopping scares'. Medical horror, maybe.

‼️ OCULUS (Hulu) - 8/10

Definitely had some of the most disturbing scenes we've watched so far, but still just not scary. Are we just immune to scare??? Loved how they did what's real/what isn't. Def had me guessing for a lot of it. Still don't think it's clear what was and wasn't real (in a good way, not a frustrating/bad way). I would trust Karen Gillan to exorcise my house.

INCARNATE (Netflix) - 8/10

Short (84 minutes) sweet and to the point. Did its thing and ended. Inception but Demons, hosted by Mr. Batman Two Face himself. Genuinely want more.

TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE (2022) (Netflix) - 8/10

Gentrification Is Bad and Influencers are Fucking Annoying: The Movie.  Lots of blood and screaming, loved the inclusion of school shooting trauma. Party Bus massacre best massacre. No magic no monsters just a pissed off dude committing murders in the name of his mom and town.

THE RITUAL (Netflix) - 9/10

Andy Serkis's movie about why camping is bad and he's right to say it. Fuck hiking. Norse mythology, cool monster, cool visuals, cults, guilt, friends fighting, compasses spinning in circles, all the good ingredients a horror movie needs.

THE OLD WAYS (Netflix) - 9/10

A somewhat realistic take on someone not believing there's a demon inside them. Cool visuals and effects, definitely had my gag reflex activated strongly at one point. The end is not the end and then there's the REAL end that is SO MUCH BETTER than if they had stopped ten minutes before. Main character ends up badass af. Based in Mexico.

‼️ HELLRAISER (1987) (Hulu) - 9/10

Look i really don't think it's the 'masterpiece' everyone else seems to think, but it was weird, grotesque, creepy, and had a goop man covered in lube so high marks for me. Felt disturbing and wrong, in the right way. Has definitely aged, but still loved it. Highly recommend.

HELLRAISER (2022) (Hulu) - 9/10

Confused on the rules but doesn't matter because Jamie Clayton and cool monster designs. Everyone gettin' off on torture. it's a good time. Love all the skin peeling, it's like helping mom with the potatoes on Thanksgiving

‼️ JASON X (Tubi) - 10/10

Jason Voorhees in the future on a spaceship, decides to immediately commit murder. Becomes half-mechanical Uberjason and fights a hot Android babe in head to toe leather with an unfortunate haircut. The vacuum of space can't even stop him. Earth 2. Amazing movie, perfect no notes.

A LIL DIFFERENT

Focused more on the mystery and story than the amount of gore scattered around (not that there's NO gore mind you):

THE BYE BYE MAN (Netflix) - 0/10

Yes we watched this because of the name. It should probably go under the Classic Horror style group but because of how hard it failed at feeling like horror it doesn't deserve to be there. The entire budget went into getting Carie-Anne Moss for the last half hour and honestly she's the best part of it. There's like?? No blood?? Would get two points for the cool little girl who saves her family by not being able to read in the dark but not even that can reclaim how bad this was. 3 college kids dick around and the killer does NOTHING the whole movie.

‼️ BOO BITCH (Netflix) - 8/10

Ghostfacers meets Mean Girls. I'm putting it on this list because it includes ghosts, which is sorta Halloweeny. Loved the look into the boyfriends' side of teenage relationships. Silly and cute.

FEAR STREET trilogy (Netflix) - 10/10

Yes loosely based on RL Stine books. Don't worry, the Gays win in this one. All three movies NEED to be binged together honestly imho, separately they fell weird and disconnected. Great story and mystery, the time jumping is great and reveals so much information, Josh and Martin need to be protected and cherished at all times forever. Lots of violence and blood, gore is few and far between.

[fortressofserenity]

So behind the times

If Hollywood and other film industries are beginning to not only adapt video games in earnest, but also where these adaptations have become critically acclaimed in any way then it’s something DC and Marvel should wise up to. Maybe their own parent companies are trying to keep them relevant as much as they can, but when video games are becoming a hot IP farm for film studios then it’s something future superhero creatives would have to be attentive to. Instead of trying to pitch a superhero story to a comics publisher, it would be wiser to pitch it to a game publisher but that’s not all.

It would have to be approached from a different angle, so different as to be largely unprecedented in superhero adaptations. I’m actually thinking something more in the lines of Alan Moore’s Top Ten (yes, that Alan Moore) where all the superheroes there are actually involved in law enforcement, so that’s an angle that’s possibly rarely, if ever, done in superhero adaptations and one that’s fresh enough to be interesting to outsiders and newcomers. If they’re used to the whole superhero being a costumed vigilante with a stage name thing, a new approach would be refreshing enough to be novel.

But one must also do market research to be able to keep up with the times, especially if today’s generation might not be that into superheroes. Like if today’s youths are more into anime like Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure and One Piece (speaking from personal experience), than they are into DC and Marvel superheroes with the latter becoming cheugy, then one would have to accept and consent to being influenced by either one of those two to remain relevant in the market. So I’m definitely going for a Jojo influence since it’s something I’m more familiar with, also it can help refresh the superhero genre for this game.

Though other influences are needed to make it actually fresh and interesting, some of it’s my own personal preferences and some of it’s based on what I’ve observed with my younger relatives. If superheroes risk being kind of outdated and out of touch with today’s youth, yet companies still want to keep those characters then they have to really find a way to make them appeal to today’s generation. Somebody like Joe Casey, when working on the Wildcats strip, had a good idea where he went on saying that to make the superhero genre relevant it can’t always be predicated on glorified pro-wrestling stories, but to look forward to a future with little regard for nostalgia.

Or something like that but you should get his point by now, which has gotten telling because of the possibility that not only are video game properties becoming more and more widely adapted by Hollywood and also critically acclaimed, but that the superhero genre might become irrelevant to today’s generation especially if they are more fond of anime properties like Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure and Dungeon Meshi (even if it needn’t to be either one or both of them) that a new influence’s needed to keep something fresh and appealing to them.

But this means that both DC and Marvel are actually behind the times or curve or something, even with their best efforts that if Zoomers are more into something else altogether then Disney and Warner Bros would have to act soon. Actually Disney is catching up with the times in some way, especially by buying stake in Epic Games upon realising how lucrative video gaming is. It did venture into video games before, with things like Epic Mickey among other things. Because video games are beginning to receive well-received adaptations and successful ones at that, that Disney’s giving video games a second chance is saying.

Video games have become the hottest IP farm these days, or at least one of the hottest since Mattel’s Barbie has been adapted into a successful live action film. One of the songs associated with it, ‘Dance The Night Away’, has even been played on radio should tell you something. Both of them are playthings but they’re lucrative playthings at that, so it’s something many film studios are beginning to take advantage of.

Things like Resident Evil, Donkey Kong, Sonic the Hedgehog and Pokemon have been adapted for television and film before, but it’s only now that more and more of them are getting this critically acclaimed and even prove to be really financially successful is something we should be attentive to. Especially when it comes to changing market trends and what’s relevant to today’s generation.

[davekitties]

oops I got high and rambled about gender my b

ironic that I only wear black (mainly) and my top 3 favorite pokemon are sylveon, skitty, and shiny virizion. the color pink, a longstanding enemy of mine, yet I still have a rather soft spot for it. to me, pink is defiant, but idk if others see it that way. a color chosen to represent women in today's society, scorn upon those who wear it "wrong," praise to those who do it "right." growing up, I always hated pink: it represented everything I never wanted to be. I never wanted to be a home maker and cook and clean and also work 40+ hours a week and take care of children. this terrified me as a child, and I grew to detest anything that would link me and femininity, ie., the color pink. I can't explain the rage my mother unleashed upon finding all the baby dolls I hadn't been playing with under my bed (re: at least a dozen). there were also unopened barbies and other baby/doll related toys and my mom grabbed one she'd gotten me recently and said, angrily, "come on, we are going to Walmart to exchange this for something you'd actually want." I, naively believed that I had finally gotten it to her, as I clutched my new giant stuffed orca plush I had found on clearance for $9 (she had spent like $40 on the gift we returned and I told her to keep the rest to make her feel better). but it was just one battle in the war to "make me a woman," something I never wanted to be.

eventually I would end up conforming to their ideals and standards (loosely) of how I was "supposed" to act and behave. I was too broken down, depressed, and tired of fighting. it was easier (on the surface level) to conform than it was to continue to fight. even still, though I tried my hardest to fill this role imposed upon me, I still loathed pink. anything but pink. pink was the personification of womanhood and why I hated living my life like this.

I was 17 when I first heard the term transgender. at first, I didn't get it (I'm a little dense sometimes), but then I kept reading the definition on that computer in the GT room that was being used to host the first ever meeting of the school's first ever GSA club. when I thought I finally understood it, my first thought was "yeah, makes sense," and then I moved on. I liked my skirts and my dresses, I liked to put on makeup every day, I liked to cook dinner every night, I didn't mind bending over backwards for everyone in my life.

when I was 19, it was a like a slap in the face one day. talking with a friend, it finally dawned upon me I didn't have to do this; I didn't have to *be* like this. I was... distraught, to say the least. a lot of things clicked into place for me (being a "tomboy," not liking "girly" toys or shows, always wearing "boys" clothes, having the feeling like there's something missing), and it *hurt*. what do you *mean* that I don't have be a woman if I don't want to be? this thought kept running through my head, along with the anger of everyone who forced me into being more feminine than I ever wanted to be.

I wanted to scream. I was so angry that it took 19 years of my life to find out that I didn't have to be a woman, that I could be literally *anything* else. it wasn't pink's fault. pink was whay I imagined was oppressing me, but it wasn't a simple color, it was society at large.

I'm older now, not as angry any more, but still sad. its not good to imagine how your life would have turned out if you had known information sooner, there's no use in speculating. I am what I am, neither man nor woman, and it's because of that that I feel comfortable enough to embrace pink again. pink has been a constant throughout my life, and I kind of hope that never goes away.

[survey--s]

636.

Think back to yesterday, what were you doing around this time? I was at work - walking Bailey, Bobby & Red.

What was the last thing you watched on the TV? I'm currently watching The Hobbit but if you're talking about TV shows, then it was Keeping Up Appearances last night.

Do you think pets can get annoying easily? Hmm, I wouldn't say annoying but sometimes it's just like...MOVE lol.

Did you know that pickles have no calories? According to Google, pickles have 11 calories per 100 grams.

Do you enjoy family get togethers? My family doesn't really do get togethers. My biological family all live abroad (except my parents) and my in-laws aren't particularly close as a group.

In a group of three, do you often feel like the third wheel? It depends on the group.

What color are your pants? Black.

Is there snow on the ground where you are? No, but it definitely feels like autumn now. It was 11 degrees when I went out a couple of hours ago.

What is keeping you warm right now? A blanket, fuzzy socks and a cat, lol. You know it's cold when Toby voluntarily comes and cuddles with you.

Has anyone bought you a piece of jewelry? Yes, several times.

How far away is your next birthday? Two months, ten days.

Do you have plans for that birthday yet? No, though I do actually have the day off for once. I'll probably go for lunch with Mike or something, that's what we normally do.

When did you last take a shower? About two and a half hours ago.

Have you ever been to the Grand Canyon? No.

Have you ever flown somewhere alone? Yeah, quite a few times. It felt weird at first but it was quite fun really.

Are you more serious or funny? It depends on the situation? I guess on here I come across as quite serious though.

Is there someone that annoys you but you haven’t told them? Hahah yes.

When is garbage day in your area? Alternate Mondays, and then alternate Thursdays for recycling.

Who/What was the last thing to really irritate you? I don't remember the last time I was genuinely really irritated.

Do you think people either love or hate spongebob? Haha yeah, I guess so. I go through phases. It's good for a kids show but sometimes it does annoy me - I think because it's quite repetitive.

Have you seen that new “Lie To Me” show? No.

What is something you’d rather be doing right now? I'm happy just having a chill day at home - it's been a crazy week.

Do you find that people are too hard on you? No.

Do you take surveys often? I rarely take any during the week unless I'm off work. I normally do all my surveys between Friday and Sunday.

Do you tend to slam things around when you’re mad? I used to, but not so much anymore.

Do you know anyone who hates/dislikes chocolate? Yeah, a few people. I'm not a huge fan - I mean, I like but it but all seems to have palm oil in it now so it's just greasy and bleurgh.

Could you vote in this last election? Yes.

Have you taken a shower today? Yes.

How much sleep did you get last night? About eight hours.

Do you have more girl friends or guy friends? Girl.

What is your current mood? Relaxed.

Is there anything on your mind at the moment? I can't believe it's October tomorrow and I'm already wearing fuzzy socks and winter jumpers.

Are there any movies out that you’d like to see? I still need to see the Barbie movie.

Have you ever been on a website called Stickam? No. I know what it is though.

Have you ever hated yourself? Yeah, I was a very dramatic teenager lol.

Are you hungry? Not really, I had breakfast just over an hour ago.

Did your parents ever ground you? No.

Where was the last place you went out to eat? The local ice-cream/coffee place.

Have you ever felt like you needed a better life than the one you have? I have felt like that in the past, yeah.

Do you own an MP3 player of some kind? No, I just use Spotify on my phone.

Do you have a moment in your life you wish you could replay over again? No.

Have you ever been in a play? If so, did you like it? Yeah, all the time in school. I loved it. I still enjoy theatre and musicals even as an adult.

What is one musical artist you wish wasn’t making music? I don't really care. I just don't listen to artists I dislike.

When was the last time you cleaned something? This morning - I cleared out the litter trays, washed the dishes and vacuumed the living room. And rinsed out the shower and did a load of laundry.

Have you ever been so sick you had to be taken to the hospital? Not sick, but injured.

Do you like your smile? Not really.

Do you have someone that you think truly understands you? Sure.

When was the last time you doubted yourself? Walking two particular dogs together but it turned out absolutely fine once they had treats lol.

Is there anything currently bothering you? Not really. I had a bit of a headache but it's finally fading.

Would you say that you’ve got something ‘special’ about you? I don't really think anyone is particularly special, to be honest. We're all just people.

Who was the last person to cheer you up when you were down? I can't remember.

Are you scared of what you do not know? No.

Is there anything in the next six months that you’re looking forward to? Yes! Going to the theatre next weekend, my birthday in December and then Christmas break a week later.

Were you/are you popular in high school? I was not.

Do you really care what people think about you? I mean, I don't want people to think badly of me, but equally I'm not bothered if they like me or not.

Do you find yourself treating others like you’d want to be treated? I try to, but it doesn't always work out that way.

Are you constantly envious of others? Not really.

Are you more of a whiner with things or a do’er of things? I do them - I mean, I might complain but nobody else is going to do my shit for me lol.

List three of your favorite TV shows: Friends, Black Books, Keeping Up Appearances.

Would your friends say you’re a relaxed person or stressed? Relaxed, I guess?

What do you find yourself worrying most about these days? I don't really worry about much, to be quite honest. I guess Simba as he's proven to have a really sensitive stomach unlike the others who can just eat anything lol.

Would you say it’s hard to earn your trust? It’s easy for me to trust people and just as easy for me to take it away. <--- yeah, that sums it up really.

Who was the last person to compliment you? Suzanne.

Anything interesting happen this past week? Not particularly, it was just a normal working week.

When was the last time you felt scared? Last week when I had to reverse up a horrible single-track road and around a blind bend. EURGH. My legs were shaking so badly but I did it and I actually did it quite well even though there were like three other cars watching me. I surprised myself hahah.

What’s on your mind this very second? I need a wee.

Do you know the difference between ‘your’ and ‘you’re’? Yes.

Do you correct other people’s grammar/spelling when talking to them online? Never.

Is bacon one of your favorite foods? No. I do like it though.

Are you one of those people who like to sleep in on the weekends? I like to sleep in a bit later but I wouldn't want to waste half my day in bed - I'm normally up by 9am on the weekends if I'm not working.

Do you like things vampire related? No.

Have you ever cussed at a parent or teacher? Yes.

When was the last time you saw snow? Last winter sometime. I think we had snow in March?

Have you ever felt stupid after saying something? Yes.

Do you find yourself cold at the moment? Not anymore, but I was earlier. I refuse to put the heating on yet though.

Are your nails currently long? No, I cut them yesterday.

Are you the kind of person who does not like talking about their past? It depends who I'm talking to.

Do you have long slender fingers or short chunky ones? Longer and slender ones.

Do you think your foot size fits your body type? Yeah, I guess so?

Are you the competitive type? I can be - especially when playing Monopoly for some reason lol.

Are you more of a mommy’s person or a daddy’s person? I was a daddy's girl growing up, but now I'm definitely closer to my mum and we have much more in common.

[insidemyhiddendrawer]

Sunday 2nd July 9:50pm

hiya folks, god my emotions have been so all over the place recently, I was mainly sobbing yesterday evening but today I was laughing pretty hard. What?

I tried a new coping mechanism yesterday, I recorded myself offloading what's on my mind onto a voice recording during my mental breakdown, it felt so weird to say it out loud and it wan't the same as thinking it to myself in my head if that makes sense but I think it might have helped a bit. they say a problem shared is a problem halved so I guess I just shared it to the void / the unfortunate future me who stumbles across it whilst trying to find a birdsong recording...

I watched Asteroid City in the cinema with my friend this evening, god I just loved the visuals but I'm still processing the storyline, you know sometimes it feels like Wes Anderson tries so hard to make his stories/dialogue deep that is ends up being superficial, also the fact that the whole 'point' of the film was slightly lost with the fact that it was a play, I don't think it was as successful as he though his movie pitch was.

Barbenheimer is approaching and both trailers were played in the correct order, Oppenheimer and then Barbie that is, I'm really SUPER exited for both films, its just a bit unfortunate they are both out on the same day... oh well. I think people forget that just because they come out on the same day doesn't mean you have to watch them on the same day, they will have more than one showing!

I also had my ballet exam this morning, my pirouettes were on fleek but there were some bits where I forgot the right direction or used the wrong leg EVEN WHEN I KNEW THE RIGHT ONE, I guess I just mess up under pressure sometimes, I'm hoping to continue at uni though so I don't feel as though this is a point where I should be the best because I will improve more after this final exam. I do feel a bit embarrassed about it but I mean I can't change it now, I could have always worked more on it but then I would have had to sacrifice some work from elsewhere and do worse on that, or at lease that's how I want to think about it.

Maybe this is a little too personal but I met someone new recently, who was really really really nice, kind and bubbly so I don't want you getting there wrong impression, but she said I should get checked out for ADHD, I don't know I guess I just hadn't considered my symptoms were actually related to that, I though it was just anxiety and dyslexia but the more I look into it the more similarities I see. I'm considering seeing a professional but I'm pretty bad at going to people about these things, I've pin pointed that its definitely because I'm scared they will diminish how I feel, mostly because its happened before at my previous school (and they were disproved later). But still, I don't know if a diagnosis would even help?

I'm so grateful to my best friend at the moment, maybe when I die they will find this account and read through all these posts and when they do, my darling best friend you have been so good to me and I hope I can repay you in however you need. So much love B

anyway, its late and I want to get up in good time to write an essay tomorrow, all the best xxx

[lordviridis]

I need better pictures, but I did go outfit shopping for Yirûn. He also has mythosaur hunter’s glaive, thanks @pyr0clast for the suggestion.

[lfc21]

Too much

You and jordan had been together since high school, he was your prom date, first kiss, first and only lover and your first romance. The day you got married was a day to remember it was something out of a fairytale. You always knew it would be jordan you would walk down the aisle to and now it was jordan who was the father of your 3 beautiful children. If there was a film about you both it wouldn't even compare to the real life moments.

Jordan had left training at 9 this morning as usual leaving you to look after your 3 children due to there half term break. Normally it was alright with just you and the kids but today was not like that. You started the day with your youngest son climbing onto you crying over his dad leaving whilst he was asleep which was accompanied by your two daughters arguing over who's barbie was who's. You usually got little bickers with the girls but not like that, you and your best friends didnt even argue like that over who's makeup was who's when you used to live together.

"Seriously put that down! I've asked once already I shouldn't be asking again" you sternly said pointing at your son as he had a hand full of paint in his hand whilst your daughters had decided to paint pictures on the kitchen floor using art paints and millions of pieces of paper. Your kids would always play in random places but deciding to do arts and graft in the middle of the kitchen was some what taking the absolute piss.

"Noooo!" Your son shouted grabbing onto your leg as you tried to get on with the tea that you knew was about to burn if these kids didn't behave.

"Right seriously pack it in" you sternly said again as he started to pull on all the cupboards he could see. Anything on the top of the counter he wanted to see and play with, you didn't know how you could keep up with the literal mini version of jordan, all you could do was want to thank Jordans mum due to her amazing parenting skills towards him. He started to climb up the counters until a large plate fell down as his hand grabbed onto it causing it to smash onto the floor. Lots of tiny parts breaking onto the floor. Your head quickly snapped to your son making sure he weren't hurt.

"Oi! That's naughty, I told you to stop! Get in the living room please" you shouted, louder than you meant to as your anger and upset started to grow on you through out the whole day. Your son ran into the living room screaming and crying as he ran over your daughters paintings causing him to run paint onto the carpet in the living room. Tiny little bright foot prints would now be pressed into the carpet which definitely wouldn't go with your theme in the living room.

"Mummy he ruined it!!!" Your eldest daughter yelled realising what her brother had done. You walked over to them both trying to see what he had done.

"Mummy hes naughty, only daddy can make us behave" your daughter said innocently not realising what she had actually said, she didn't understand how upsetting her small comment was due to her age but it was most definitely hard to hear. The 2 girls ran out wanting the tv to entertain there eyes knowing they still had abit of time before there tea. You rested your head in yours hands on the kitchen counter as you felt embarrassed on how much of a bad mother you had become in one day, you never knew thats how your children actually felt. It hurt, more than any argument with jordan or any comments made by random people, it was like something else.

"Babe! Whats up those kids are insane out there" jordan said concerned as to why all 3 of his children were wanting to pull each others hair out. Jordan had decided to come home early in order to help you out.

"Shit, I don't know darling I'm sorry erm tea will nearly be ready in 2 mi- oh fuck right now it will be ready" you quickly said startled due to Jordans early return, you didn't exactly want him to see all this.

"Babe what's up? Stop panicking" he reassuringly said grabbing onto your arms to stop you from walking off from him. You looked up at his eyes knowing you couldn't hide it. The tears fell from your eyes way quicker than you could stop them. Jordans hand came to the back of your head and pulled you into his chest strocking your long hair which was falling out of its bobble. He had seen you in this state a few times but he weren't expecting it to be today, it was only last week everything was perfect whilst you where making memories on holiday in the hot sun and beautiful beaches.

"Shhh darling it's ok" he innocently said secretly wanting to find out what behaviour issues his kids could of had to make you this upset. You pushed away the tears from your cheeks trying to fight the urge to let the other tears fall.

"Erm they said your the only one that can make them behave and they where awful today! Seriously they where screaming, shouting, fighting all day and complaining that you werent here! All i wanted was you to come back! they were so bad babe I can't look after them like this" you blurted out trying to dish out the tea whilst jordan stud resting on the counter opening a packet of grapes whilst taking in your emotional state. He quickly pushed the grapes onto the side and rushed into the living room and disappeared to the kids.

After your outburst to jordan the kids had settled down and gotten ready for bed after their tea, even though you where mad at them you where still there to give them a hug as jordan read them a bed time story as they cuddled up in your sons bed.

"Now what do we say to mummy" jordan whispered to the 3 of them with a smile as you stud quietly in the doorway with your pyjamas on.

"Where sorry mummy we love you" they all said in unison looking up at you with huge smiles on their faces. Jordan must of given them a good word as your 3 little babies had finally learnt something from today which was to never send you into a world of chaos. You would always love and cherish the time you had with your perfect family bit it often got very overwhelming yet worth it.

[dreamingofaizawa]

Guys My Age

Title and concept inspo: Guys My Age by Hey Violet

Soft Dom! Aizawa Shouta x Medium-sized Fem! Reader

Quirkless AU

***18+ Fic***

You must be at least 18 years old to participate in this reading. If you are under the age of 18 please step out of line and find another fic. Thank you and have a good day.

Warnings: Age gap, praise kink, DD/LG dynamic and terms, use of the words daddy and sir, light bondage, overstimulation, smut. 

Word Count: 4.1k

Author’s Note: I KNOW, I know, I write a lot of Aizawa fics, and they’re all DD/LG stuff. I know, okay? It’s an obsession, I’m in love with this man. Anyway, another soft dom Aizawa, but reader isn’t very well-versed in intimacy. Also, reader is what some would call medium-sized. Not necessarily big, but definitely not small. This is for all my medium-sized girls, including myself. I was very self-indulgent with this one.

Part 2

Enjoy~

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You’d always been told you were mature for your age. It wasn’t until recently you realized how true that statement might be. You’re currently 21. And very, very single. You’ve had a total of six different relationships, and all of them fell through for one very simple reason. The boys you dated were just that. Boys. They were extremely immature. Only ever wanting to ‘hang with the boys’ or stay at home. No effort was put into the relationship on their part after the first few weeks. You didn’t understand why these vastly different boys were all so adamant on staying inside.

You’d tried desperately to get them to go out on dates with you. You offered to pay, and drive, and literally anything else. But no, they were too busy playing video games or getting higher than the damn sky. Don’t even start thinking about sex. You hadn’t got any of that shit since your first ‘boyfriend’ at 17, who used you like a sex doll and broke it off once he found someone hotter and sexier and altogether better in his eyes. You were sick of it. So you did the last thing you’d ever want to do. You went on a blind date.

You’d stumbled on a website last week that allowed you to set up a blind date with a stranger. It seemed legit, and had background checks on all participants. It also allowed you to put in any preferences you had, and matched you with someone that had similar preferences and hobbies. The age range you put in? 30-35 years old. Because guys your age just didn’t cut it. You needed someone more mature, someone who could treat you like a woman, not some girl.

Today, almost a week after matching with someone, you were standing outside an italian restaurant. You didn’t know his face, just his name and age, and that he was a teacher. Aizawa Shouta, 31 years old. And he’d sent a single message when you matched.

Meet me at this location on Saturday. When you enter, I’ll be at the back corner table. Semi-formal. 8 pm, please don’t be late.

It was blunt and straightforward. You liked it. You just hoped he wasn’t quite this blunt in person. You’d put on a black knee-length cocktail dress with a halter top and a partially open back that fell to the small of your back. It accentuated your shoulders and the top half of your torso before fanning out at your waist, the silky material falling and swaying around you. 

You slipped on simple white heels and silver jewelry, with a white clutch purse. You’d decided to pull your hair into a loose half-up half-down, a silver comb pinning your hair in place, minimal makeup and clear lip gloss. For the first time in a while you felt pretty. You knew you weren’t exactly small, but the way you were dressed gave you confidence.

You looked at your watch. 7:55 pm. You took a deep breath, straightened out your dress, and stepped into the restaurant. The host asked if you had a reservation, and you told him you were meeting someone who already arrived. He let you pass, and you walked back to the table Aizawa told you to meet at. He had his back to you as you approached, but you could see his broad shoulders and muscular frame easily. 

He wore a white long-sleeve button down, sleeves rolled up to his elbows, and a black vest fitted to his form. His slacks were also fitted, showing off his muscular thighs. His long raven hair was pulled in a half-up half-down similar to yours. You hadn’t even seen his face yet and he looked delicious.

Your heels clacked on the wood flooring, and as you neared the booth he turned to look at you. You stopped next to the table and got a good look at the stranger. He was beautiful. His dark bloodshot eyes looked tired, the bags underneath giving him away and only adding to his appeal, and a scar curved under his right eye. A sharp jawline, with a tamed scruff, and thin lips in a neutral expression. You were about to introduce yourself, but he stood from the booth and held his hand out, palm up. “You must be (y/l/n) (y/n).” You smiled at the gesture, and placed your hand in his. “That’s me. And you are Aizawa Shouta. It’s a pleasure to meet you.” He pulled your hand to his lips and placed a kiss on your knuckles, before leading you to your seat.

As he sat down, you noticed a bottle of wine sitting in the center of the table in a bucket of ice, and two glasses of wine halfway full. One sat in front of you, and the other in front of Aizawa. He began the conversation with a rather specific question. “So, (y/l/n), why are you on a dating website looking for men that are so much older than you?” Normally you’d take offense to a question like that, but the way he said it was pure curiosity. So, you answered. “If I’m being honest, it’s actually pretty simple. Guys my age just don’t know how to treat me.”

He raised an eyebrow at that, a barely noticeable smirk tugging at his lips. “And how do you want to be treated?” You smiled a little at the implications behind the question, and answered. “I don’t want to be stuck in my room while my ‘boyfriend’ plays video games and smokes weed. I don’t want to be ‘one of the boys’, and I don’t want to have to plead and beg to go on a date or spend time with him. I want to be treated like a woman, not a girl. And I want to spend my time with a man, not waste it on a boy.” 

At that, Aizawa smirked and sipped at his wine. You both took a quick look at the menu and ordered when the waiter came. As you ate, you talked about random subjects and hit it off quite well. The date went by quickly, and at the end of the night you’d exchanged numbers. “I look forward to another date with you, Ms. (y/l/n).” “The feeling is mutual, Mr. Aizawa.” 

When you got back home, you undressed and cleaned your face and got into bed. As you lay there, your mind drifted back to the date, and how undeniably handsome Aizawa is. The way he spoke to you like you were his equal, and looking at you like an ancient treasure. He was everything you wanted, without even considering anything sexual. Little did you know he felt much the same way.

____

When the date ended he texted Hizashi to let him know he was free. Hizashi, of course, called him immediately, and began drilling him about the date. “How’d it go Sho? Was it a rando with a thing for older guys? Did she want a sugar daddy?” Shouta rolled his eyes. “No, Zashi, she wasn’t looking for a sugar daddy. She was...actually really mature for a 21 year old. She knows what she wants. I admire that a little. And I won’t lie, she’s quite beautiful. Not the generic, model, beauty-pageant, barbie doll pretty. It’s a natural glow she has. It’s...quite mesmerizing...”

Hizashi exploded on the other side, laughing at the new infatuation his friend had for a blind date. “I hope she’s your type, Sho. I mean physically. I know how much you like them with a little meat on their bones.” Aizawa groaned at his comment. He knew he was just teasing, but that his blonde friend was 100% right. He knew he had a type, and he’d be lying to himself if he hadn’t looked at your full figure quite frequently. 

He’d taken in your dress, how it showed off your shoulders and back. As you climbed into your car and took off your heels, he trailed his eyes up your legs, getting a small glimpse at your thick thighs. When you sat up behind the wheel, he revelled in the small rolls showing through your dress, wanting nothing more than to squeeze them and kiss them and bite them...

He shook away the thoughts that were threatening to take over his mind. “Shut it Hizashi. Her body is none of my concern, and is most definitely none of yours. I enjoyed the date and that’s what matters.” The loud blonde gasped dramatically, “Oh my god she totally is! Damn you go get some Sho!” Aizawa just ended the call.

*

*

*

The next date was planned once again by Aizawa, and it was only a week after the first. It was a simple coffee date at a small cafe. You talked casually about the things you enjoyed doing. You convinced him to let you take care of the next date, which you decided would be a relaxed ramen date. You’d gotten comfortable around each other, and after about six more dates, he invited you over to his place for dinner. Of course, you accepted.

He’d sent you the address and apartment number, and you stood outside his door in dark jeans, black flats, and a beige sweater with a white tank top underneath. You knocked on the door, and when it opened he greeted you with a peck on the cheek. It had become a normal greeting, since you’d gotten so close, though the gesture always made you a little shy. He told you to get comfortable as he finished up dinner, and you sat at the kitchen table and admired him as he worked in the kitchen. He wore fitted blue denim jeans, and a black cotton t-shirt, his hair pulled up in a bun. 

No matter how many times you looked at him, he was always just as shockingly handsome as the first time you saw him. His t-shirt left his toned arms exposed, and it was fitted to his torso, showing off his muscular frame. Your eyes traced the outline of his muscles from his shoulder, down his arm, drifting to his hips and up his back. You didn’t notice him glance back and smirk at you. “Like what you see kitty cat?” Heat rushed to your face at the realization that you’d been staring, and the fact that he’d noticed. And that name… “K-kitty?” you barely whispered, before quickly apologizing. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to stare.”

You didn’t think he heard the first part. You were wrong. “It’s alright. And yes, kitty. Don’t like the pet name?” Your face burned at the tone of his voice. “N-no, the name’s fine, you just...caught me off guard.” He chuckled. “I should do it more often. You’re cute when you’re flustered.” You didn’t think your face could get any hotter, but it did. You tilted your head down and away from him and bit your lip, letting your hair fall to hide your face. You’d never gotten this kind of attention before, and you had no idea how to handle it.

You were too busy trying to calm your breathing to hear him approach you. The proximity and demanding tone of his voice made you jump a little. “Look at me, kitten.” You swallowed and took a breath before turning your head to him, and he hooked a finger under your chin, tilting your head so you were forced to sit up taller. He moved even closer, your shoulder brushing against his abdomen, and you nearly had to look straight up to look in his eyes. 

Your eyes began to drift away from his, and he jerked your chin up higher, silently commanding you not to look away. You brought your eyes back to his and held his gaze, and after a few moments he smirked. The hand under your chin moved to stroke your cheek with his knuckles. “Good girl.”

He quickly dropped his hand and went back to the kitchen to finish preparing dinner. It took you a few seconds to let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding. You panted a little, trying to calm yourself from what just happened, and clasped your shaking hands together. But they weren’t shaking from fear. In fact, you couldn’t quite tell why you were so shaky and out of breath. And the praise from him sent a shiver down your spine.

He managed to distract you while you ate, and you had completely recovered from whatever that was earlier. After dinner you moved into the living room and relaxed on the couch while you talked some more. Soon he’d leaned his head back and closed his eyes, still talking and listening, but clearly relaxed. Once again you found yourself distracted by his body, following the muscles in his neck down to his toned chest and abdomen. And again, he noticed. “I can feel your eyes on me, kitten.” His voice was low, a rumble of smooth baritone. You found yourself turning away to hide your face again, and the command in his voice controlled you with ease. 

“Don’t look away from me, kitten.” You turned back to him, and when your eyes met his, you looked away, and he let out a low growl and your eyes snapped back to him. He adjusted and sat up, your eyes still fixed on each other. He pat his leg, “Come here kitty.” You blinked at him, not quite prepared for such a demand. His eyes darkened a little and his voice dropped to a growl, “I won’t ask twice.” 

At that you got up and went to sit on one of his legs, but he pulled his knees together and shook his head. So you climbed over and straddled his legs on your knees. He grabbed your hips and pulled you so you were fully sitting on his lap, your core dangerously close to his growing bulge.

Your eyes were still locked on his as he leaned close to you, his hands rubbing circles into your hips.  He leaned past your face and whispered into your ear. “Can I touch you kitty?” You took a shaky breath and nodded. He laid a light spank on your ass and you jumped. “Use your words kitty cat.” “Y-yes, you can t-touch me.” He laid a kiss on your neck and whispered ‘good girl’ before moving his hands under your sweater and tank top. He ran his hands up and down your back, and he gripped the fatty flesh of your stomach and hips, kneading it in his palms gently as he worked his way up your body, leaving feather light kisses along your neck and jaw.

The intimacy had you quivering, and the way he nearly worshipped your body had your breaths coming out shaky and heavy. Shouta caught on quickly. “Is it safe for me to assume you haven’t done anything in a while?” he said in your ear. You started to nod, but quickly caught yourself, “Y-yes.” He stilled his movements and wrapped his arms around your waist, resting his chin on your shoulder. “Tell me what you did before this.” You took a breath and explained the situation as simply and quickly as possible.

His arms tensed, clearly upset that you’d been used like that. But he didn’t pry into that right now. “So you haven’t explored anything? Like any preferences you might have?” You shook your head quickly, “N-no...why?” He chuckled. “Well, kitty, you’re quite submissive. If you’d let me, I can help you explore this side of you.” You swallowed and nodded. “Y-yeah, I think I’d like that.” He hummed into your neck, “We can start tonight, but only if you’re comfortable and you want to.” You took a few moments to think about your answer. This man had been nothing but good to you. He treated you with more respect than all the boys you dated had combined. And you trusted him. “I...I’m comfortable starting tonight.”

“Alright kitty. Now, listen to me closely, because this is important, okay?” “Okay, I’m listening.” “Good. Since this is new to you, we need to establish a safeword. Is ‘roses’ alright?” You nod. “Okay. Now if anything ever gets too much for you, if you feel uncomfortable for any reason, if you need to stop for any reason, or if there’s a medical emergency, you need to use it. And that goes for me too. If I don’t like where things are going, I’ll use it. Once we use the safeword, everything will stop right there, no questions asked. Understand?”

“I understand.” “Okay. Can I trust you to use it if you feel the need to?” You nod, “Yes. I’ll use it if I need to.” He kisses your neck, “Good girl.” The praise makes you shudder, and you feel him smile into your neck. “Now, kitty, I want you to address me as either ‘Daddy’, ‘Sir’, or ‘Master’ when we’re like this, do you understand?” “Yes.” He spanks you a little harder. “Yes what?” You jump at the contact “Y-yes Sir.” Another kiss on your neck, “Good girl.” He leans back and taps your arms, “Up.” You lift your arms and he pulls off your sweater and tank top at the same time. 

His hands come back down on your shoulders, and he runs his hands down your chest and stomach, taking the time to remove your bra and knead your breasts. He wraps his arms around you and stands up, and you wrap your arms around his neck and your legs around his waist as he carries you to his bedroom. He puts you down on the bed on your back and takes a rope out of the bedside table. You let him take your hands and tie your wrists to the bar at the headboard. It’s not uncomfortably tight, but a few experimental tugs tell you it’s solid and you won’t be getting out of it unless he unties you.

He trails kisses down your body, unbuttoning your jeans and removing them as he goes. Once your jeans are off, he loops his fingers in the band of your panties and pulls them off. After that, he leans back and just rakes his eyes up and down your body, eating up every inch of your skin. “You’re such a pretty kitty.” His words have you shuddering and blushing. You’d never been called pretty before, and you knew why. You were a little bigger than other girls. You weren’t necessarily insecure about it. You didn’t care all that much about how people saw you with just your looks alone. But you knew Shouta was admiring your body after knowing who you are as a person, and it made you a little giddy.

His mouth and hands were all over you, squeezing and groping, sucking bruises onto your skin. His touches were sending waves of heat through your body, and pooling between your legs. You desperately wanted him to touch you there, and you whined and rolled your hips up into the air. “Such a needy kitty. Be patient. I’m not done here yet.” He rolled a nipple in between his index and thumb, pulling the other into his mouth and teasing it with his tongue. You mewled at the sensation, and he switched his mouth over to the other side.

Your legs were rubbing together, begging for friction, and he finally moved down to your dripping core. He took a finger and slipped it over your folds. He groaned as his finger collected your slick, “You’re so wet kitty. Are you this wet for me?” You nodded your head frantically, and he laid a light smack on your pussy. You let out a soft whimper, “Yes Sir, it’s for you,” you answered quickly. He hummed, “Good girl. I didn’t even need to remind you to use your words.” He kissed the inside of your thigh, and moved to lick a stripe up your folds. You gasped at the new feeling, never having anyone’s mouth down there before.

He slipped the pink muscle into you easily, groaning when he tasted you. The sound sent vibrations through your dripping cunt, making you squirm at the pleasure. He looped his arms around your legs, dipping his fingers into your core and using the slick to rub tight circles onto your clit. An unfamiliar sensation built in the pit of your stomach, your muscles tightening in your abdomen as it got stronger. You knit your eyebrows together, and in between heavy breaths you gasped out, “S-sir...it feels strange.” He raised his eyebrows at the statement, and increased his pace until that coil inside you snapped, which didn’t take very long.

Your back arched off the bed as you let out a loud, sharp moan, your legs shaking from the intensity of your first orgasm. Aizawa kept lapping at your pussy, letting you ride out your high, and once you were relaxed and panting on the bed, he lifted his head and wiped his chin. “Kitty, have you never cum before?” He asked, a small smirk tugging at his lips. You shake your head, “No S-sir...Is that what just happened?” He chuckled, but didn’t answer the question, “You’re going to have fun tonight kitty.” You didn’t have time to question what he meant, though, because he slipped a thick finger into your core, and you mewled as your walls clenched down on him.

The game he played went on for what felt like hours, and you lost count of how many times he’s made you cum. He’d fucked you and cum multiple times himself. You’d already squirted several times, and tears were streaming down your face from the overstimulation. It felt so good, but it was starting to melt your brain and the title of ‘Sir’ drifted to ‘Daddy’ as it went on. All the muscles in your body were burning from flexing so hard, and your wrists were feeling raw from how hard you’d been tugging at your restraints. It felt so, so good...but it was too much. He leaned down close to your face and kissed at the tears, “You’re doing so well babygirl. You got one more for me?” 

You giggled lightly at the praise, your mind fuzzy, unable to form coherent thoughts as he thrust his hips into you. He stilled his movements and caressed your jaw. “How are you feeling, kitten?” Your eyes looked up into his, struggling to stay open. You giggled a little as you answered. “It’s… I f-feel…” You knit your eyebrows together in concentration, searching your brain. “R-roses?”

Everything stopped, and he instantly reached up and tugged off your restraints, and pulled your exhausted body close to his chest. Your breathing got heavier, and your chest got tight, and fresh tears fell down your cheeks. He held you tight, kissing your tears and petting your hair as your cries died down. He held you like that until your breathing was normal again. You slowly opened your eyes, weakly calling out to him, “Daddy?” He kissed your forehead, “I’m right here kitten. Tell me what you need.” You nuzzled your head into his neck and mumbled, “Water. Can I have water?” He wrapped you in a soft blanket and stood up, carrying you with him. “Anything for my kitten.”

He set you on the counter and made a glass of iced water, holding it up to your lips. As you sipped, he rubbed your back and kissed your forehead and neck, and he didn’t stop or move until you had drained the cup. He left it in the sink and picked you up again, taking you to the bathroom and filling the tub with warm water. He turned off the tap, took off your blanket, and carried you into the tub. He washed the both of you, massaging your scalp, and you let out a sound like a pur, which he smiled at.

When he was done, he stood you up and wrapped you in a fluffy towel, dried himself with one, and carried you back to bed. You curled into him, and he wrapped his arms around you. “Are you okay (y/n)?” You nodded into his chest, “Yeah, I’m okay. It was just intense.” You could hear the smile in his voice as he spoke, “Thank you for using the safeword. You did so well for me kitten, trusting me like that.” You nuzzled into his chest some more, relishing in the heat his body gave. 

You loved the praise he gave you. It made you feel warm and fuzzy in your belly, and it felt so good. Soon you were drifting into a deep sleep, comfortable in Shouta’s arms. This was nice. You’d be happy to let him guide you, let him take care of you like this. One thought drifted through your head as you drifted.

‘Guys my age could never.’

[entertainment]

Entertainment Spotlight: Genneya Walton, #blackAF

Genneya Walton came to acting through a passion for dance and performance. Once on screen, she starred as Bryden Bandweth on Project Mc², as well as taking on roles in The Resident, 911, Criminal Minds, School of Rock, and Extent. Up next, Genneya will be playing the role of Chloe Barris, daughter to Rashida Jones and Kenya Barris, in his new mockumentary #blackAF. Loosely inspired by Barris’ irreverent and honest approach to parenting, relationships, race, and culture, #blackAF uncovers the messy and often hilarious world of the fictionalized Barris family. We had the opportunity to chat to Genneya about her character on the show, experiences on set, and what it means to be a young woman of color in the world of film and television. Check it out:

You wake up tomorrow as the character you play. What do you do first? 

If I were to wake up as Chloe, I would freak out first but I think that’s a given. Secondly, I’d go through her closet and try everything on because her style is incredible and I can only imagine what her full wardrobe looks like. 

In #blackAF, you have a lot of siblings. Do you have a large family IRL? If so, were there any similarities to your rapport with your on-set family? If no, did the experience make you glad or sad you don’t? 

In real life I only have one older sister -- far less than the 5 siblings I have on the show! My parents' style of raising kids is not at all the same as Kenya and Joya’s, so I can't say there are really any similarities between my real and tv family in that aspect. Although with both of them I am lucky to be able to share my honest thoughts and feelings with them even if it’s hard at times. Even though growing up I did want a baby brother, I wouldn’t want to change anything about how my family functions now, but it was definitely an experience to almost live another life in a household that’s run so differently. 

Describe the premise of #blackAF to a five-year-old? 

#blackAF is about a teenager that is filming her family’s everyday life to send in to her favorite college in hopes of getting in. With parents like ours and six kids, things can get crazy at our house. We act a little more “out there” than a typical family so I don’t think it would be appropriate for a five year old, but you can tell your parents to watch it ;) 

What’s the first thing that you remember being a fan of? 

The first thing I remember being a fan of is Barbie. It was one of my favorite toys growing up and the movies are actually what inspired me to perform. Second, I think it would be Usher’s Confessions album. I had no business singing his songs as a child, but those songs are certainly timeless! 

Can you tell us about a funny experience you had on the set of #blackAF? 

When you’re working with Kenya and Rashida something funny is bound to happen everyday. We had a moment of downtime on set and Kenya was showing off some dance moves and Rashida hopped in and it turned into an impromptu dance battle. All I’m gonna say is they both can do a mean robot. Certainly a sight to see and I’m happy to say I’ve witnessed it in my lifetime. 

You began your career dancing before you moved on to acting. Has dancing taught you any valuable lessons for your acting career? 

Dancing has certainly shaped who I am today and I’ve been able to apply those lessons to everyday life. I used to be the most sensitive person on the planet, and although I still have my moments, the tough love from teachers gave me a thicker skin that is necessary to have in this industry. Particularly from being a competitive dancer I learned the value of teamwork and trust. A scene is a collaboration, not a solo, and when you have a scene partner you have to put your full trust in that person in order to let go and be vulnerable. Also, in competition you can’t win them all, and that’s certainly the case with this industry, and I learned from a young age to come to terms with things not always going as planned and to push on and work harder. The long rehearsal hours and high expectations to perform well every time prepared me for work days on set that could sometimes be 14+ hours. All of the hard work that goes into finally performing a 2 minute dance piece is similar to the endless preparation before a new project only for the final cut to be x amount of minutes long and that’s all people get to see. After all it’s about the journey not the destination right? Being a dancer instilled a lot of important lessons within me and I owe my current position to dance aka my first love. 

Without spoiling anything, did you have a favorite scene in the show that was fun to shoot? 

While on vacation things got a little heated between Chloe and Drea and we really had the opportunity to take it there. Both Iman and I have sisters and were able to relate to our characters in that moment. We were both completely understanding of the situation and each other's emotions that it almost made it feel as though we were truly sharing that moment together as sisters. It was a special moment for myself and it definitely brought us closer. It was a very fun challenge and I’m so happy to have been able to share that with her and portray the ups and downs that siblings have. 

How do you embody the mission of #BlackExcellence365 in your everyday work? 

I think that black excellence is our drive and ability to go for, and accomplish the great things we do despite the boundaries that have been set in front of us. We have so much power within ourselves and such a great ability to impact lives. As a kid, I only had a handful of young women of color to look up to and I am grateful that they have paved the way for young actors like myself. I am now in the position to possibly be that for today’s young girls, and it is truly a dream and a huge responsibility that I am thrilled to take on. I hope to take part in roles that can positively impact and inspire young girls to be the best versions of themselves that they can be. Representation on screen is so important and the media has the ability to shape young minds. So far I've had the honor to play a past role of a teenage genius who is a master at coding and is not afraid to be herself or speak her mind. I now get to play a young adult who attends a great college and is setting up her future. Those characters within themselves are what I believe to be some great representations of black excellence and if they positively affect at least one person I am proud of that. I’d like it to be known that it took almost two years of being unemployed before I landed my current role. At times it was tough and I honestly had a fleeting moment where I considered giving up, but I kept pushing and would have never gotten to experience being Chloe if I didn’t hold faith in myself! As my career goes on, I intend on using my platform to be vocal about things that matter most to me and inspire and pave the way for those after me. This is all bigger than myself and each accomplishment and even failure on the way to success that we share is an embodiment of #blackexcellence. 

Do you have any advice for young women of color who are looking to get into the acting business? 

When wanting to accomplish anything in life it requires hard work, resilience, and genuine belief in yourself. You will get more no’s than yes’s, but you cannot let that discourage you. When you know you have something special to share with the world, you have to keep pushing on. I’d highly recommend surrounding yourself with people that are like minded so you can uplift and push each other towards your individual goals. An African Proverb that I think describes this well is, “If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together.” So finding a strong support system whether that be within your family or your friends, I personally find to be helpful during the journey. When things get tough it is easy to get lost or caught up in this all, but remember to stay grounded and true to yourself. There is no one else like you, and that alone holds so much power! 

Thanks for taking the time Genneya! #blackAF is now streaming on Netflix.

[threeletterslife]

Propinquity (Law of Seesaw)

→ [6/7] of the Glossary Series

→ summary: You first meet him on a seesaw. What a surprise, your relationship with him is exactly like that of a seesaw too—there are ceaseless ups and downs. So much so that you wonder when it’ll end. 

→ pairing/rating: yoongi x reader | PG-13

→ genre: 50% fluff, 33% angst, 17% crack | e2l!au

→ warnings: profanity, mean insults

→ wordcount: 9.2k

♫: Seesaw by BTS

You can't remember the last time you've gone a week without fighting.

There is always a new problem that arises. A new argument that is sparked from the depths of trivial problems. Then Yoongi stops talking to you for a day (or days if the fight is serious) and sleeps downstairs on the couch until he wants to crawl back to you and apologize. Other times, you're the one who has to drag yourself to your boyfriend's study with a plate of his favorite fruit and an apology in your head.

But it seems like the fighting never ends.

Now the bed feels cold. It is empty. Just like you.

You know that Yoongi's downstairs, either working with his new client (through the dead of the night) or already sleeping on the small couch. Though you're supposed to be mad at him, you worry. The couch isn't good for his already deteriorating posture. But you can't nag at him now. It'll result in more arguments.

When was the last time you and Yoongi didn't fight, though?

The correct answer is never.

From day one, you and Yoongi were destined enemies.

"Hi." You're a proud little child, standing up straight with your hands on your hips. A bit chubby and round in the middle but you flaunt the extra weight. "My mommy says I need to make friends before kindergarten starts."

"My mommy says not to talk to strangers." The young boy peeks at you through his shaggy black hair. He rocks the paint-nicked seesaw by himself, kicking his feet off the ground only to come back down with a light oof.

"I'm not a stranger," you scoff, crossing your hands over your chest. "Let me play on the seesaw!"

Yoongi doesn't even have time to answer because you're crawling up on the opposite side already. "H-Hey!" he yells but he's too late. The moment you innocently perch upon the seesaw, you’re slammed to the ground and Yoongi's lifted up high in the air.

Ah, the weight difference.

"GET ME OFF!" Yoongi screams. "GET ME OFF!!"

Your eyes turn wide. You hadn't meant to scare the boy. You thought everyone wanted to fly up in the air, and you were just granting the little boy's wish. In your head, you didn't even think of the possibility that Yoongi is afraid of heights. (Which was stupid of him to even try playing on the seesaw in the first place.)

"GET OFF!" Yoongi yells viciously at you. His face has turned a bright shade of pink and purple.

You think he looks like he's about to suffocate.

"I'M SORRY!" you shriek as you dive off the seesaw.

Yoongi lets out a high-pitched, ear-piercing scream as he subsequently flings off the seesaw. He lands on his butt several centimeters away from the rusty playground equipment and bursts out crying.

You gasp. Oh no. This was bad. Very, very bad. So you do the first thing that comes to your head: run away.

The boy's cries become louder and louder as you sprint in the opposite direction, but you grit your teeth and dash on. Eventually, your guilt for throwing off a boy from the playground seesaw dissipates when your mother buys you ice cream for lunch. Food is always the solution.

You have no idea that day you accidentally made a little boy cry was the day you met your future boyfriend. You just thought you met a crybaby coward.

And he thought he met the devil. If the devil was a chubby little girl with chipmunk cheeks and rolls on her arms.

You two had no idea you would meet again.

So far, the first day of kindergarten isn't going so great. All the other girls brought their barbies to class. You brought your stuffed animal snake—Mr. Slithers.

And now the other girls don't really like you. Because "snakes are icky!" Their words, not yours.

If they only knew this week was a rainforest theme in your head. Every day of the week, you would prepare to bring a new stuffed animal that lived in the rainforest. Today would be the green snake, then tomorrow, the tree frog and so on. But no one applauds your genius planning skills.

So you mope around for half of the day. The girls are playing princesses with their stupid barbies and they won't let you join because a snake cannot wear a ball gown.

You end up poking at the seesaw in the kindergarten playground. It's boring when there's no one else to sit on the other side. Mr. Slithers isn't heavy enough to seesaw with you either. You want your mommy.

"You!" a high-pitched voice shrieks.

Jumping, you whip your head around to see the little boy. No. The same little boy who you accidentally flung backward on the seesaw.

"Are you gonna throw me off the seesaw again?" he yells. For such a skinny little boy he has quite a loud voice.

"I didn't mean it!" you yell back.

"You need to apologize to me!"

"No!"

You run away again.

And just like a real big stupidhead, Yoongi tattletales on you to the kindergarten teacher, Mr. Kim. In your defense, you didn't even do anything to Yoongi at kindergarten, so Mr. Kim can't make you apologize to stupid Min Yoongi.

Mr. Kim agrees with your defense. But he doesn't approve of you using the word, stupid, so you have to apologize to Yoongi anyways. While you're positively livid, Yoongi is triumphant.

That is only the start of the rivalry.

In first grade, Yoongi calls you fat.

You aren't normally one to waste your time tattling to the adults, but Yoongi did it to you in kindergarten so it only feels right to get revenge. But apparently calling someone fat is much worse than calling someone stupid. Yoongi has to apologize to you and he has to sit in the time out corner. He also gets a call home so his parents are notified of his bad behavior.

In second grade, you start losing weight. Not because Yoongi called you fat. But because you figured you should start exercising to be as healthy as your gym rat parents. When you tell the second-grade class you want to become a football star and you've planned out your whole athletic pathway, Yoongi is the first one to rudely laugh at you. So you make sure to boo his presentation when he brags about writing a whole book by himself (it's called Dot Goes to School—pretty mediocre stuff). Both of you have your recess privileges taken away.

Staying in for recess with someone you absolutely despise is not worth the satisfaction you got from teasing them. So you and Yoongi become more discreet in your never-ending ways to spite each other.

In third grade, Yoongi calls you a stick during recess. He makes sure to say it loud enough so you can hear his insult but not as loud so the playground monitor doesn't hear. Sneaky brat. You turn to him with flashing eyes and tell him very upfrontly, "Says you."

The rivalry still exists in fourth grade, when both of you feel like you're too old to play on the playground. The seesaw incident is still ingrained in the backs of both of your heads, though. So even when you and Yoongi have your separate groups of friends, you still manage to be mean to each other.

For instance, the day before the annual fourth-grade square dance, you and your new group of friends spread a rumor that Yoongi has cooties. As a result, no one wants to be his partner the next day.

But then your partner, that brat, Park Jimin calls in sick on D-Day and so your plan backfires in your face. You dance with Yoongi. And now you have cooties too.

In fifth grade, girls are starting to talk about boys during recess. When the shy, cute Gayoung confesses her crush on Min Yoongi, you have to excuse yourself from the friend group. Instead, you go out on the fields to play soccer with the guys. Thankfully, cooties are 'for babies' in fifth grade, so you have free reign with the boys.

Park Jimin confesses he likes you in sixth grade. He tells you that you are pretty. But his confession was definitely not in your schedule. You're supposed to go to swim practice in five minutes. So you wave him off. Not because you hate him. But let's face it. The boy ditched you in fourth grade and you had to dance with Yoongi. Plus, now Jimin's Yoongi's friend. There is no way in hell you are going to butt noses with Yoongi's friend.

The whole grade goes in an uproar when they find out you rejected Jimin. You couldn't care less.

Seventh grade is weird. You finally get your period. And the new sex-ed class collectively makes everyone embarrassed. It also starts the influx of period jokes from yours truly, the boys. Whenever a girl is in a bad mood, the boys yell, "YOU MUST BE ON YOUR PERIOD!" You make note of every guy who says this. Then the second time they yell that to a poor girl, you hold up a tampon with ketchup on it. It shuts them up so well that all the girls in your grade start to carry around tampons and ketchup packets.

Surprisingly enough, Yoongi isn't part of the rowdy group of boys who make insulting period jokes. He's gotten much quieter over the years (middle school must've brought some sort of maturity on him), but he still finds ways to make your life miserable.

When there are rumors that Jimin will ask you out to the Halloween dance, you actually prepare to accept—maybe just to spite Yoongi. But turns out the whole rumor was a lie made up by the boy you despise. So you're rendered embarrassed.

In eighth grade, to your surprise, Gayoung asks Yoongi out. Of course, Yoongi would say yes. He knows you hate Gayoung. She had grown ample boobs and fit in with the popular girls who talked about boy bands and got dress-coded every day. You have no idea why such a popular girl would ask out a nerdy, rat-faced boy. But apparently, Yoongi is conventionally handsome. What a load of bullcrap.

It irks you even more when they become a revolutionary couple—the first time a girl has asked out a boy.

You make a bet with your friends that the couple won't last a week. Your wallet cries that year. You lose nearly ₩30,000.

By tenth grade, they are still dating.

You're starting to wonder if Yoongi somehow got his grubby hands on a love potion. There's just no way that whiny asshole can keep a girlfriend for that long. But according to your friend who is friends with the friends of the friends of Gayoung's friends, Yoongi is a good boyfriend. You want to gut yourself after hearing that.

Gayoung is always bragging about how Yoongi buys her flowers before class, and she makes sure everyone knows of this by posting pictures of the aromatic bouquets on Instagram. Yoongi often writes her little love poems and short stories, and though you're 100% sure Gayoung doesn't read them, she posts those online too. God, she is so annoying that you unfollow her. (You've blocked Yoongi's account a long time ago.)

For the most part, though, when hating Yoongi is not on your mind, your life is pretty normal. And you're definitely content. You and a sporty transfer student from America, Jungkook, have hit it off. It's fun taking him around everywhere to taste test all the convenience stores in Korea.

Until the day you catch Jimin and Gayoung lip-locking behind your favorite kimbap store. You and Jungkook look at each other with wide eyes. Before Jungkook can stop you, you snap a quick picture of the action and run away, tugging your friend along with you.

"Dude, you should delete that picture," Jungkook says for the billionth time.

"No can do," you tell him. "I'm sending it to Yoongi."

"To spite him?"

"Duh."

"Aren't you helping him by telling him his girlfriend is a cheater?" Jungkook challenges.

You squint. "You're actually right, Kook. Then I won't tell him."

"Isn't that a little bit too mean?"

"What??"

"I mean, they've been dating since eighth grade. It's been nearly two years, right?" Jungkook points out. "I think Yoongi deserves to know."

"Don't you dare!" you gasp.

"Sorry, Y/N," Jungkook shrugs. "It's just the right thing to do."

Two days later, Gayoung comes to school wearing not the school uniform but a short skirt and tight shirt. Her arm slings around Jimin, her apparent new boyfriend. Yoongi is nowhere to be seen.

Rumor travels around fast. And they're all accurate for the most part.

But it's not very satisfying to see Yoongi missing from all the action. The whole school day, you wonder where the fuck the boy is. Maybe he's crying his guts out. You've never experienced heartbreak before, so you're not sure if you have the right to say Yoongi necessarily deserves it. You can say though, that he had it coming. After all, all those years he teased you, he hadn't felt a single bit of remorse.

Sucks for him.

It's dark by the time you begin to walk home from school. You'd stayed late to brush up on your horrible chemistry skills so you wouldn't completely fail the final test. On the walk back, you notice the familiar playground. You'd grown up with that thing. But it's been a while since you've cared enough to stare at it.

Usually, the rusty old playground is empty. But today, a figure sits in the shadows. More specifically on the seesaw.

It brings back memories. That had been the same seesaw that had started your rivalry with Min Yoongi. And someone's sitting on it.

You squint, your curiosity getting the better of you as you creep towards the figure. Oh god. Once you see the outline of the person, you know this isn't going to be a very fun experience. Ew, you think. Gross.

But that's until it occurs to you that the person is crying.

Holding your breath, you walk closer to the crying boy. He's shaking, hands covering his face. The other side of the seesaw is up in the air.

He's crying about Gayoung, you realize.

You breathe out. "Need someone to sit down to fling you out again?"

Yoongi jumps. He hiccups. Then he quickly wipes away the tears streaming down his face. "Shut up."

You grin, sitting down on the other side of the seesaw. And this time, neither of you fling off. It is completely balanced.

"What are you doing here?" Yoongi croaks when he realizes you're not going to be leaving any time soon. He sniffles, but for the most part, he hides the fact that he'd been crying very expertly.

"I dunno." You shrug. "What are you doing here?" When there's a pause, you add, "I didn't see you in school."

"Oh, didn't know you cared."

"I don't."

"Figured."

"Did you break up with Gayoung?"

Yoongi laughs scornfully. "No. She broke up with me."

"Yikes, really?"

"What is your deal, Y/N?" Yoongi sighs. "Are you going to laugh in my face? Tell me I deserve this?"

"Not anymore..." you grumble. "Because now there's no element of surprise."

Yoongi rolls his eyes. "I reckon you spread the rumor?"

"...The rumor?"

"Yeah, the fucking rumor!" Yoongi shouts, throwing up his hands. "You're the one who told everyone Gayoung was cheating on me!"

"Woah, there! I didn't say anything about it!" you yell. "It's not my fault your ex decided to hook up with Jimin!"

"What??"

"Here! I have the fucking receipts!" You whip out your phone, aggressively swiping through your photos before landing on the exact one you were looking for. When you show Yoongi, his eyes turn wide but his posture deflates. He looks defeated.

"She actually cheated...?"

The way he says it with wide eyes and a slumped attitude makes you feel a tiny bit of pity. But the habit of being mean to Yoongi sticks.

"I'm not even surprised."

Yoongi glares at you.

"I mean," you say with an innocent shrug, "she's been eyeing other guys since you started dating her."

"I know..."

You are not about to show sympathy to Min Yoongi. You are not going to let down your guard. You are going to stay cold and emotionless—

"I'm... uh... I... er, I guess I'm sorry."

Yoongi lifts an eyebrow. "Why are you sorry?"

"Well, it just seemed like you really liked her—"

"Nah."

"Oh?"

"This is going to sound very stupid."

"Try me." You grin. "In my eyes, you always sound stupid. Remember? I got in trouble for calling you stupid in kindergarten."

Yoongi rolls his eyes. "How could I forget?" He grips the seesaw handles. "I don't think I've ever really liked Gayoung."

"Damn, this is tea," you gasp. "Why bother dating her for so long, then?"

"Ha!" Yoongi laughs. "Good question, Y/N. I don't know," he says sarcastically. "I was probably trying to piss you off. Didn't think it'd last that long."

"Oh??" You raise your eyebrows. "But didn't I just see you cry over Gayoung?"

"Er—"

You definitely caught him in a lie. Though it's dark, you can imagine Yoongi flushing a bright shade of pink—he does that when he's guilty. Not that you cared enough to notice over the years.

"It's okay she's with Jimin now. Not your problem."

"Is this your half-assed attempt of trying to solace me?"

"No?" You make a face. "Why on earth would you think I'm trying to solace you, Yoongi? You called me fat in first grade."

"I see you still hold grudges."

"Oh, that's really my only talent," you snort.

"Aren't you a really good planner?"

"Me?" Is this a compliment you hear?—and from the Min Yoongi?

"Yeah, you're going to plan the graduation ceremony, right? They hand-picked you from the student council, didn't they?"

"Well, uh, yeah." You raise your eyebrows in both surprise and suspicion. "Didn't think you'd care."

"I don't."

Of course.

"Okay, fine by me."

"Why are you even here again?"

You pause. Actually, why are you here? You could've just simply walked away and never had this conversation with Yoongi. But you'd stopped. And now you're talking with him. You answer him truthfully. "I really have no idea."

Another pause.

"Are you gonna ask me to leave?"

"... No."

"Oh." You cock your head. "Okay."

The two of you stare at each other. A staring game commences.

But Yoongi blinks first, claiming you the victor of the little contest. "You can stay if you want."

You scoff. "Excuse me, I didn't know I needed your permission."

Yoongi throws his hands up in the air. "Do you always have to fucking pick a fight?"

"You're the one who starts them!"

"I didn't even say anything mildly rude."

Okay, he might kind of have a point. Maybe all those years of hating him have ingrained permanent hatred in your head, so whatever comes out of Yoongi's mouth seems like an insult that you have to respond to with equal rudeness by reflex.

"Where did we even go wrong?" you sigh, rubbing your forehead.

Yoongi snorts. "Literally right here. On this seesaw."

"You're right," you laugh. This is probably the first time you and Yoongi have agreed on something; it's a foreign feeling that doesn't quite settle right in your stomach.

"Remember when Jimin had a crush on you?"

"Oh stop—" Just one single sentence brings back so many memories.

"Now he's downgraded to girls like Gayoung," Yoongi snorts.

"Oh?" A wide smile stretches across your lips. "Are you saying I'm an upgrade compared to that vile girl?"

"When you put it that way, I'm not so sure."

In any other circumstance, you'd think Yoongi's attacking you again, putting up another unnecessary fight. But right now, it's obvious he's just teasing you.

"Let's face it, Yoongi. I'm better than your ex, aren't I?" you tease right back.

"Barely," he grumbles, but he mumbles under his breath, "but yes."

Thankfully, your owl ears pick up the last part and you grin haughtily. "That's all I needed to hear." Just by habit, you glance down at your watch, frowning when it reads a little past 10 p.m. You're definitely behind schedule right now. Strangely, though, it's kind of worth it, talking to your self-proclaimed nemesis without ripping each other apart with moderately hurtful words.

Yoongi takes notice of you checking the time. Always the same, he thinks. He can't remember the last time he saw you without a watch.

"Anyways... it's getting kind of late..." you say. But you're careful not to stand up from the seesaw—just in case you'll accidentally fling Yoongi off again.

Yoongi nods in agreement. "Yeah." But what he hears next is beyond what he would've ever thought would come out of your mouth next.

"Wanna get some cup ramen? I know a good convenience store nearby."

"With me??" The words slip out of Yoongi's mouth before he can maintain his stoic, chilled composure.

"Why not?" You shrug. "Maybe tonight's the night we can finally stop fighting and act civil for once."

"I am getting tired of the back and forth bickering," Yoongi admits. "Not a bad idea, Y/N."

"I come up with genius ideas once in a while." You flip your hair back and grin. "We just can't stay out before 12 because I need to plan my friend's birthday party before 1."

"I'll get you home by then."

"You're going to walk me home? How boyfriendly."

"It's a habit," Yoongi grumbles.

"A good habit. Keep it up, Min," you laugh. "Then you'll get a new girl in no time."

The two of you count to three before carefully getting off the seesaw together. There are no accidents this time. Everything seems... balanced.

The most what the fuck moment in your life comes when you wake up one morning and realize the person you text and hang out the most is, indeed, Yoongi. Months ago, the thought of him made your blood boil. Now, he's just a friend—a very close friend, too.

Entering eleventh grade with Yoongi by your side is weird. Every other school year, the two of you tried to stay away from each other as much as possible. Yet this year, it's the complete opposite. The two of you solace each other. Even if that involves heavy teasing and harsh verbal exchanges.

"You idiot!" Yoongi shrieks. "And you just let her get away with it?"

"Why yes, why yes I did!" you scream in your shrill voice that makes Yoongi almost flinch back. "What was I supposed to do? Yell at her and tell her I deserved to be class president and not her? Tell her to her face that she cheated the votes?"

"Yes?!"

"Well, I didn't have the guts!"

"Why do you always run away from your fucking problems?"

Yoongi's words pierce through your heart and suck up your anger, replacing it with regret. He’s right though. When something doesn't go the way you planned, you have a habit of ditching. You're afraid of the consequences that will follow when you freestyle everything. And Yoongi knows this.

"I-I... I just... It's easier," you sigh, slumping over your desk seat. "What else am I supposed to do?"

"Fight back maybe?" Yoongi's tone is softer after he sees you become dispirited. "I mean, hey, you win some, you lose some."

"I know... I just feel like I'm always losing these days."

"It's okay," Yoongi says. His big hands awkwardly pat at your back. And as funny as it is that he's attempting to comfort you, you're actually well comforted. "Doesn't matter whether you win or lose. What matters is the experience."

"Wise words."

"Well, I'm a wise person." Yoongi gives you a shit-eating grin.

"Oh god."

Sometimes, Yoongi's the one who breaks down, though it's not as often as you do. But once the storm comes, it's hard to make it leave.

"Please don't talk to me right now."

"But Yoongi," you plead, knocking on the door to his room. "I had to practically beg your parents to let me in!" you whisper angrily. "Come on, open the damn door!"

"I don't want to talk about it."

"Do you want me to break the door down??"

Silence follows and a small click indicates that the locked door is now open. You carefully turn the knob and push. Yoongi faces you immediately and the way his eyes are red and his cheeks are wet is indicative of a beforehand hysterical crying session.

"Oh, Yoongi..."

"I said I don't want to talk about it," he mutters. But you know he's just saying that because talking about it will make him cry again. You know him too well.

You pull him into a hug. "Maybe music isn't for you," you say. "It's okay if you failed that path. There are many more to take."

He's silent, squeezing you tightly. But you don't mind the silence at all. It's more peaceful that way, and you know he's actually listening to you when he's not talking.

"You're good at writing aren't you?" you whisper, patting his back. "Maybe that's your path. And if it isn't, so what? Poke at every pathway until you find one that's just right for you."

It's advice for yourself as well. Yoongi's upset that he was rejected from a music audition he was preparing to pass for years; he knew he wanted to pursue music and he did it, though it might not have been very successful. You, on the other hand, have no idea what you want to do in the future.

"I guess we both have to start on new paths now, right?"

By twelfth grade, you and Yoongi are beginning to bicker like a married couple. At least, that's what Jungkook says.

"For the last time, we do not sound married!"

Jungkook rests his head on the palm of his hand. "Sure. Sure."

"The thought of even being romantically interested in Y/N gives me goosebumps," Yoongi snorts.

"But the good kind of goosebumps if you know what I'm talking about," Jungkook says. He wiggles his eyebrows in such a suggestive way that you mock vomit.

"Okay, gross," you groan. "The day I catch feelings for Yoongi is the day the whole world will end."

"Um, right back at you," Yoongi frowns. "Don't worry," he says, giving you a cocky grin. "I'm very repulsive. You'll never catch feelings for me."

"We'll see about that," Jungkook snickers.

Every year, Yoongi writes you a birthday letter. Even now, in college, he manages to find time to make the same effort he's made for the past two years. Every year, he somehow makes you cry with his elaborate words. And every year, Yoongi films it because he's a little shit.

This year though, the tone of the letter is much, much sweeter than you expected. Almost as if it's a love serenade and not a platonic letter to your best friend. The writing is elaborately flourished and fluffed up to the point it sounds like a love poem. And you swear Yoongi spritzed perfume on the envelope because the letter smells (shockingly) amazing. The message itself doesn't make you cry. Instead, after you finish reading it, you stare up at Yoongi's camera in shock, jaw dropped open but no words coming out of your mouth. Yoongi seems to like that reaction a lot, and he even zooms up on your dumbstruck face to make fun of it later.

He'd written ten things he loves about you. And it drove you crazy that you didn't know whether it was platonic or romantic.

Love, Yoongi. He'd signed the letter. Not the usual, From your bestest motherfucking greatest friend, Yoongi.

What the fuck did 'Love, Yoongi' even mean??

And it happens so that the two of you fight about it later on.

"This year's birthday video is the best one yet," Yoongi laughs as he tries to turn the camera around to show you the screen.

You jerk away, frowning. "That is not funny."

"Why? Didn't like my letter this year?" He's teasing you but you're annoyed.

"It was different."

"A good different?" Yoongi nudges your shoulder, a smug smirk plastered on his lips.

"Literally, please, stop. Before I wipe that smirk off your face."

"Okay, okay," Yoongi sighs, raising up his hands in defense. "I bet you're just salty you can't name ten things you love about me."

"You're right, right now, I can name zero things," you scoff.

"Liar. You wouldn't have stuck by my side for this long if you didn't love me."

The fact that he's right makes it more irritating.

"Fine. One. You're an asshole—"

"Come on, is that really a reason?" Yoongi laughs. "This isn't ten things you hate about me, you know."

"Hear me out. You're a certain species of asshole that I find slightly more bearable than any other asshole," you say. "I think you're a tolerable asshole. It's a compliment."

"Thanks?"

"Two. You're an idiot—"

"Is this how the rest of the reasons gonna go?" Yoongi scoffs incredulously. "My letter was heartfelt at least!"

"No, but you're a bearable idiot. The kind that irks your strings just enough to make you pissed but not enough to make you explode. No idiot is tolerable but at least once in a million years you give good advice." You shrug as Yoongi shakes his head in denial.

"I always give good advice."

You roll your eyes. "Three. You're not very good looking—"

"I shouldn't even have asked," Yoongi grumbles. "Why did I fucking bother?"

"No, but you're not ugly. Isn't that good news?" you giggle as Yoongi just shakes his head at you. "It's perfect! That way, you attract people with your personality and not your looks! It's a compliment," you add when Yoongi glares at you.

"Whatever," he says.

"Four!" you say triumphantly. "You are drama-free. Except with me. But I'm an exception because I'm special."

"You got that right," Yoongi mutters underneath his breath. "What about five?" Compared to a minute ago, he looks more interested in your list now.

"Five? Well, you're genuine," you say nodding your head. "You wouldn't let me walk around with an eyelash on my face or spinach stuck between my teeth."

"Yeah 'cause you'd embarrass me too because you'd be by my side," Yoongi protests.

"I'm gonna pretend I didn't hear that."

"Fine. Six?"

"Six... hm..." you hum. "You have pretty eyes."

Yoongi laughs out loud. "Thanks, I guess."

"Seven... let's see... hm..." You rub your chin thoughtfully. "Well, you put the toilet seat down for me."

"My mother didn't raise a hooligan."

"I actually agree with you on that one," you say, laughing. "For eight, I want to just say you're a good friend."

"You stole my number 8 on my letter to you!"

"Yoongi, you should just be glad I even repeated it back to you," you giggle. "Wanna hear nine before I forget?"

Your friend sighs but he nods.

"You're a very good writer. And I'm not just saying that to boost your already enormous ego or anything, but I genuinely think you can write," you say. "And I love that because then I get these good ass letters on special occasions. It's weird how you can choose each word so carefully that all of the meanings fit in this gigantic well-flowing story. And you'd think you'd use all these hard vocabulary words to throw me off, but your writing's easy to read and comprehend. It makes it more impactful." You quirk your brow at your friend who finally looks satisfied. "Is that enough?"

"Yes, now that's more like it!" Yoongi grins. "Butter up my ego a bit more, won't you?"

"Can't. I don't have a number ten for you." You shrug. "Sorry."

"C'mon, you can only think of nine reasons why you love me?" Yoongi leans into you, poking your cheek. "I thought of eleven but I had to take one off. This isn't very fair."

"Oh? What was the eleventh?"

"It was more of a joke so you don't need to know."

"Excuse me? I love jokes—even though I don't take them very well."

"Yeah, well, I especially don't want you to take this a bad way," Yoongi says.

"Was it something mean about me??"

"Kind of."

You frown, scrunching your nose. "Try me."

Yoongi shrugs. "Fine, then. I called you oblivious. Happy?"

You lean back from your friend, giving him a disgraceful look. "Me? Oblivious? First of all, no. And second of all, why would you love that about me?"

"Oh, I don't know, because you're so oblivious you can't even tell that I like you??"

One look at Yoongi and you can tell he's dead serious. "Woah," you breathe. You want to ask him to repeat what he just said to see if you heard him correctly the first time. But he's already looking a little impatient at your delayed answer. So you gape at him, muttering a soft, "Like? As in...?" You can't finish the sentence.

"As in love?" Yoongi finishes for you. "Sure."

"Bro..."

Yoongi rolls his eyes. "I thought the letter made it obvious, Y/N."

"Well, I thought you were joking." You fidget with your hands. "Damn, Yoongi, now what the fuck am I supposed to say?"

"Do whatever you want with that information," he says, shrugging so nonchalantly that you wonder if this man even has feelings.

"Broo..."

"And if that means you're gonna keep saying 'bro,' then I guess that's fine too." He gives you a shit-eating grin.

"No, it's just that... wow. Since when??"

"Like, a year ago? Bit after Jungkook called us a married couple," Yoongi says. "But I'm so dead inside I hid it pretty fucking well. I kept thinking it'd go away too, but man, I still like you now, so I guess the feelings aren't going away anytime soon."

"But what are you proposing??" You run your hands through your hair. "That we go out??"

"Okay, you said it, not me."

You huff. It's weird. This dynamic you have with Yoongi. One moment you're bickering and the next, Yoongi's confessing his feelings for you. Strangely, though, you're not as turned off as you expected.

"One date."

Yoongi raises an eyebrow. "One date?"

"You can buy me dinner, and if it goes horribly, we're going right back to friends," you bargain. "In the case that it goes well, then, uh, you tell me."

Yoongi laughs. "Oh, I'll be the one to tell you, all right."

And unfortunately (or fortunately, depending on the way you look at it), he's right. Four days later, your relationship with Yoongi becomes official. It irks your strings that none of your friends are even the slightest bit surprised about your newfound romantic relationship with the man you'd known for way more than half of your life.

"We all saw it coming, Y/N," they tell you. "We're actually surprised you two didn't date sooner."

But Yoongi is actually a good boyfriend, so there are no regrets. Aside from the small bickering here and there (the married couple kind of arguing), your relationship with him is sound. And the fact that not much has changed in the way you treat each other since you began dating makes you wonder if you were technically in love with Yoongi this whole time but you were way too blinded by your stupid senses and habitual, platonic teasing that you didn't think you actually liked him romantically. It doesn't really matter now, though. Because you're with him anyway.

Yoongi's love language is quality time and coincidentally, so is yours. College becomes a blast. When you're not studying, you're with Yoongi and when you're not with Yoongi, you're 'studying,' but really thinking of your boyfriend.

Yoongi has a way of plaguing your mind. It's been like that since you were little, too.

Once out of college, things become more difficult. Marriage matures into a serious question that neither you nor Yoongi is ready for. So both of you put it off.

As soon as you secure a job as an event planner and Yoongi becomes a professional grant writer, the honeymoon phase of the relationship plummets to the ground.

For nearly eighteen years you were a victim of Yoongi's 'teasing.' His judgmental remarks. But there is a time and place to be a critique.

"Oh, come on, the food isn't even that bad, Yoongi. Just a little bland. That's it."

"There was a hair in my soup," your boyfriend complains. "I'm asking for another bowl."

"Okay, fine, but don't ask for the manager like last time."

"Last time, the waitress called me a tightwad!! What was I supposed to do?"

"Just let it slide? You yelled at her for bringing you bad food when she didn't even cook it! Can you please stop acting so above everybody?"

"Whatever." Yoongi sets down his silverware. "I'm gonna Uber home." He tosses you his credit card and it slides across the wooden table and stops right in front of your dish. "And I'm going to write a Yelp review of this shitty place."

"You're not a fucking entitled writer! Stop acting like one!" you call out to him as he turns his back to you and storms away.

You end up eating dinner at a restaurant by yourself. Yoongi's right, the place is shitty, and the food is bland, but it's not downright intolerable.

Often, these days, it feels like your relationship with Yoongi is spiraling downward. The two of you cannot seem to agree on anything. It reminds you when you'd hated him in your younger years. But you can't hate him now; you live with him.

He's unavoidable.

Usually, Yoongi drives. The car feels foreign to you only because you normally don't sit in the driver's seat. The short mixtape of songs Yoongi wrote and produced for you plays the moment you turn on the engine. He'd gifted that to you a few months ago, after one of your bigger fights. You let the soft serenades play as you drive home.

No matter how many times you and Yoongi fight, the two of you make it up to each other somehow. There is no fight without a resolution. Yoongi will be waiting for you when you get home.

And he is. He's waiting with a blueberry yogurt cake from Paris Baguette sitting on the kitchen island and a letter in his hand. A written apology. Because Yoongi thinks he conveys his feelings better in writing than with spoken words.

"I'm sorry for storming off..." he says almost shyly. The man is nearly twenty-five years old but he sounds and looks like a guilty child with his lips pulled out in a pout and his eyes glancing nervously at your face to see if you weren't going to yell at him. "I, uh... didn't write the Yelp review."

How can you stay mad at that?

"And I wrote you an apology..."

You walk closer to your boyfriend and hug him. "Thank you..."

"Yeah," he says. "And good news, the cake will be really flavorful compared to what you had for dinner."

You smile. "Good thinking."

After a storm, there is always a rainbow. When there is a down, there is an up. And vice versa.

"Can we please stop planning every single fucking second of our lives?" Yoongi says exasperatedly. He flings away the brochure you had handed him that detailed the week's trip to Hawaii down to the last minute. "We're going on vacation. This makes me feel like I'm going to a stupid summer camp."

"If we're going to Hawaii, we shouldn't just relax around in the hotel all day, Yoongi," you scoff, gathering the abandoned brochure and tugging it to your chest. "There's stuff to see on the islands. We need to try everything my friends did! Why would we even go to Hawaii if we're not going to do these fun activities?"

"Come on. 7 o'clock breakfast? 8 o'clock hiking up to the falls? 10 o'clock scuba diving in the ocean? 12 o'clock lunch at the top of a big ass hill that we have to climb up ourselves? 1 o'clock zip-lining meters in the air? 2 o'clock festival? I could go on, but isn't that too much? When can we breathe?" Yoongi shakes his head. "No way. And all of that's just in one day. And the second day is even worse. Y/N, I want to go there to rest."

"If you wanted to rest, then you can do it at home," you argue. "Why go to Hawaii to rest?"

"There are different types of resting," Yoongi sighs. "What's a better way to fall asleep than in front of the ocean? We get to relax in a hotel, which means we won't have to make our beds or cook our meals or even do the dishes. That's relaxing for me."

"Well, it's not relaxing enough for me."

"Come on, Y/N. We went to Banff and you planned every single second of the trip there. I thought it was miserable. Can we please relax just once? For literally one trip?"

"But I already booked everything..."

Yoongi curses. "Why are you always four steps ahead of everything? It's unnecessary!"

"Maybe I'm not four steps ahead and you're just four steps behind!"

"Oh, so you're telling me that everyone else in the world plans their days down to the last second." Yoongi rolls his eyes. "Bullshit, Y/N."

"It's not my fault you're so—so, fucking lazy!"

"I'm not lazy!" Yoongi's eyes flash as he slams the dinner table. "You're just too high maintenance! Fucking nobody can keep up with you!" Before you can react or even yell back, he pushes his chair away and stands up, stomping away in a fury. You can hear him enter his study. There's that familiar door slam again. And the click of the lock means you won't be getting in that room anytime soon.

You're left by yourself, clutching the Hawaii brochure to your chest. A little angry at yourself but a lot madder at your boyfriend. With a bitter scream, you toss the brochure in the trash and curl up in a ball at the side of the couch.

But the thing about you and Yoongi is that with time and space, you recognize each other's perspectives. The rest is history.

Three hours just crying out your pent-up anger gets the irritation out of your system. By the time you're done though, you're a little hungry and guilty. You make a few phone calls and switch things around.

"Hey." You knock on the door of Yoongi's study. You're too afraid to turn the knob yourself. "I know you're in there."

No answer.

"I canceled the excessive activities..." you whisper against the door. "We can plan the trip together... I mean, better yet, we don't even have to plan anything at all... We can be..."—it pains you to say but—"spontaneous."

"Go away. I'm trying to work."

Sometimes Yoongi takes a bit longer than you to come around.

But by dinnertime, he's crept out of his study and has already ordered takeout from your favorite restaurant. The steaming pile of white rice and perfect side dishes lie on the dinner table, waiting for you. He waits for you too.

"I got a new client," he says, looking down at his hands. "And I got your favorite food." You notice that he's holding the Hawaii brochure you'd thrown away. It's a little wet on the sides. Maybe because Yoongi had to wipe off the remnants of the leftovers in the trash that had stuck onto the paper. Your boyfriend finally looks up at you. Shyly. Almost cautiously. "Wanna compromise?"

"Compromise?"

"We plan half of the trip and wing the rest of it," he offers. Yoongi slides you the brochure. "See, so I was thinking..."

You've always hated roller coasters. They are almost always unpredictable with head-jerking twists and turns that bring you closer to vomiting the contents of your stomach rather than pure bliss. There are one too many ups and downs.

Yoongi likes to joke that your relationship with him is a roller coaster. Only because there are too many dips that rocket up to the sky only to plummet down again. You disagree. Because, eventually, no matter how shitty the ride is, roller coasters do end. Your relationship with Yoongi is not over.

You like to compare your relationship with Yoongi like the ocean waves. But during a tsunami. The ups are great; the towering waves give you a beautiful vantage point. And it's all fun and games until the waves crash down on everything you once loved, destroying them. And the process repeats so much that in the end, there is nothing left.

That's what you feel now. Empty.

Alone in the bed with Yoongi downstairs and nowhere to be seen near you.

After a while, even the highs of the relationship makes you feel numb. The lows wreck you past your breaking point. It takes more time to find resolutions—the fights go on for longer than days, even weeks.

When you were younger, fighting with Yoongi was irritating at most. Now, they leave you sobbing and drinking alone in the corner of the bathroom. But it's so late in the game.

You've known Yoongi for over eighteen years of your life, since kindergarten. You keep telling yourself that he's the only one in the world who could understand you; and you're the only one in the world who can understand him. But other than that, you can't find another reason why you're with him.

Sometimes, you listen back to the mixtape he made you years ago. The lyrics don't apply to you now. And this year, for your birthday, he half-assed a letter for you last-minutely because he was 'busy.' Busy drinking with his friends the night before. You've stopped planning your dates for months.

Actually, when was the last time you went on a date with him?

You can't recall.

Maybe the back and forth arguing you and Yoongi had gone through in the majority of your relationship was a sign—a bad sign. If only you hadn't met him on the seesaw that day. Then maybe none of this would've happened.

You might be dating someone you have things in common with. Maybe someone you don't argue with as much.

Falling asleep with tears in your eyes that keep the pillow wet until morning is an occurrence that you're too familiar with. It is an occurrence you want to stop. When Yoongi isn't downstairs by morning, you're thrown into further misery. He usually works from home... He must be really angry to leave without saying anything.

You eat breakfast by yourself. Lunch consists of ramen. And dinner... Yoongi's still not home so you skip the meal altogether.

By 9 p.m., you look at your phone. You don't want to be the first person to break—the first person to apologize—but you worry. Will he hang up on you? Tell you to go away? The possibilities seem endless.

So much thinking hurts your head. Some fresh air might do the trick. Before you know it, you're wandering around a familiar rusty playground again. It brings back childhood memories. When your hand trails across the paint-chipped monkey bars, you're brought back to when you were only six years old. The towering obstacle had looked so big when you were little. Now, you could easily cross the bars by simply walking.

It's strange to see the once-bustling playground be completely empty and in the dark. You hear that they're going to tear down this place to construct a little convenience store so no one must've visited this playground in a very long time. You'll miss it when it's gone. You had a lot of fun around here.

Just as that thought passes through your head, your eye catches sight of the seesaw.

Ah, the start of everything.

Slowly, you walk towards it. Each step makes your feet sink further in the smoothed over gravel but you manage to sit at the very edge of the seesaw. Immediately, the other side flings up in the air. It reminds you of when you flung Yoongi in the air. A pretty funny memory. But not right now. Thinking about Yoongi now hurts.

You hate it when you start to contemplate the worst-case scenario. A breakup. Moving out. Stress. Tears.

You run your fingers across the rusty handle of the seesaw. Hopefully, things don't come to that. But how much longer can you handle the arguments? They seem to be elongating as time passes. What if one day, the argument lasts a month? Several months? A year?

If there is one thing in your life that you strive to achieve, it's predictability. With Yoongi, there is none of that. He makes last-minute plans out of nowhere and doesn't tell you until the last second. Then you have to go on a frenzy to reschedule everything. It is a cycle that you've become sick of. And he's sick of you planning everything.

That has been the issue of the last ten fights.

The same issue.

And it's unfixable.

You and Yoongi are rock bottom on the very floor of the Mariana Trench. The back and forth game of banter has turned into something more serious, and it just isn't as light-hearted and funny anymore.

"Hey."

You nearly fall off the seesaw at the sound of Yoongi's voice. He's got his hands shoved in his pockets and he looks like he was awake for more than 24 hours.

"H-Hey," you say.

"The seesaw, huh?"

"Yeah." You nod. "The seesaw."

Yoongi smiles but it's not a very happy one. Even now, you don't think either one of you wants to apologize for the fight.

"I've been thinking," Yoongi sighs. He doesn't spare you another glance before he sits on the other side of the seesaw. You're suddenly jerked up in the air. There used to be a balance but it seems like Yoongi's gained some weight—or you've lost a lot. "Remember when I said our relationship is like a rollercoaster?"

"And I said I disagreed."

"Right." Yoongi sighs. "I take that back. We're not like a rollercoaster. We're in a game."

"A game?"

Yoongi gestures at the seesaw. "This is our game."

"...The seesaw?" You raise an eyebrow at the man but Yoongi doesn't budge.

"Yes. Look." Yoongi pushes off the gravel with his feet, putting himself in the air while sinking you to the ground. "And when you push..." Following his words, you launch yourself back in the air. Yoongi looks up at you as he sighs. "We're always on opposite sides, opposite places."

"Even when we try to balance," he continues, trying to lift his body to bring you down to the same level as him, "we fail." He ends up higher than you now and you look up at him.

"Some game this is..." you mutter.

"It's a game of ups and downs," Yoongi tells you. "It's tiring, isn't it?"

"Of course it is."

"And like all games... there is an end."

You raise both eyebrows. "Oh."

"From day one, you know... we weren't really supposed to get along," Yoongi says. "But somehow seeing each other every day, bickering with each other... all of that let us be in closer proximity with each other. And then we thought we were meant to be."

"You're analyzing our relationship?" you scoff.

"Don't act like you haven't done the same, Y/N."

You're silent.

"It doesn't matter whether we love each other at this point, Y/N... Does it? Love or not, I don't think I can live like this."

It's ridiculous. You're having a grown-up discussion possibly leading to a breakup on a fucking seesaw of all places.

"You want to separate?" Your voice comes out smaller than you expected. When it becomes a reality, it's much harder to digest.

"You've been thinking about it too, right?" Yoongi sighs. "I mean, I heard you call your mom the other day. And it didn't sound too good."

Guilty. "Well, yeah, I've been thinking about it... Just... I just didn't think it'd become a reality so soon." And you always thought you would have initiated the breakup, not the other way around.

"Yeah... I felt bad you always took initiative with things so I decided to save you the stress and do it myself."

"Wow. Thanks." You shake your head. "Real thoughtful."

"Right?" Yoongi grins. "I don't think a lot will change if we break up. We've always hated each other a little."

You let out a wry laugh. "I'll never forgive you for calling me fat."

"And I'll never forgive you for calling me stupid."

"Looks like we're even."

"Yeah, for once." Yoongi shrugs. "I guess we can be platonic roommates until I find another apartment."

"Sounds good to me." You ignore the tears welling up in your eyes as you try to smile. "Let's get off this seesaw to seal the deal then."

"The end of the game." Yoongi's voice shakes just enough for you to know he's crying.

And as the two of you walk back to your shared apartment with tears streaming down your faces, you realize you wouldn't have it any other way. A breakup any later would be regretful—even wasteful of time. A breakup any earlier would've left you to separate forever. A breakup now is perfect.

You're acquainted enough to still possibly be friends. But not bound by marriage to make the procedure worse and more complicated.

Of course, you love Yoongi. But sometimes, you love the wrong people—the people you don't belong with, the people who won't make you happy. You're just glad you didn't run away in the beginning. Yoongi taught you a difficult rivalry, a difficult friendship, a difficult relationship. But you don't always have to go the hard way.

When a relationship becomes like a game—repetitive with the addition of wins and losses—that's when you know you can stop.

You'll be on the easy route now and find someone who is as crazy about planning as you.

You look up at Yoongi. His cheeks are wet with tears but he doesn't necessarily look sad. Instead, he looks hopeful. Like he'll find somebody who can appreciate his love for leaving sarcastic Yelp reviews or somebody who loves spontaneity as much as he does.

And when he finds that special somebody, you'll be happy for Yoongi. But, of course, not before you tease the living shit out of him first.

—masterpost

—masterlist

[et-lesailes]

hot young neighbor

pairing: andy barber x reader

word count: 2233

summary: you’re not expecting such a sexy next door neighbor upon moving into your new home. you already know you want to make a move, but he seems to do it first when he invites you over for dinner.

themes: smut, age gap, oral sex

taglist: @evanstush, @tanyam93, @bval-1, @wonderwinchester, @patzammit, @rohaintahquil, @deidrashouseofpain, @sammyslonglostshoe, @jadedhillon, @bohemian-barbie, @whysparker, @sebastian-i-stan, @sebabestianstan101, @lille-kattunge, @teller258316, @peach-acid, @allsortsofinterests, @xoxabs88xox, @heyiamthatbitch, @cptn-sgrogers, @heyyouwiththeassbutt, @bangtan-serendipity, @troublermalik, @beardburnsupersoldiers, @bookish-shristi, @kind-sober-fullydressed,  @gingerninjaprincess16, @straightforwardly,  @denisemarieangelina,  @frencchfries, @xlanawriter, @littlemoistcarrot, @pottxrwolff, @arianatheangelworld, @ifuseekamyevans, @southerngracela, @nsfwsebbie, @rororo06, @savemesteeb, @raveviolet, @inactivewhore, @hurricanerin, @captainamerica-is-bae, @shaddixlife, @tessa-bl, @marvelouspottering, @pppsssyyyccchhhiiiccc, @thegetawaywriter, @dwights-new-plague, @rynabarnesrogers, @fckdeusername, @doloreschanal, @ssworldofsw

notes: sorry, this was supposed to be posted earlier but my laptop was getting fixed! hope you guys enjoy!

You’re going for a run in your new neighborhood when you see him.

You had just moved in a few days ago, and while you had already gotten to introduce yourselves to a lot of your neighbors, he’s the one you’re most interested in, and haven’t gotten a chance to talk to yet, either. He lives in the house right next door, and you sometimes see him from your window when he’s pulling up in his driveway or on the lawn throwing a football with whom you assume to be his son. You have yet to see a woman around, though, which pleases you.

He’s hot. Sexy, really, you’ve never seen someone as attractive as him. While casually digging for dirt when talking to the other neighbors, you only know his name and his occupation, but nothing about his love life. 

You glance down at yourself, happy that you’ve chosen your cuter workout apparel consisting of a sports bra and matching leggings. Coming to a stop in front of his house, you call out just as he’s about to open his front door, his arm carrying what appears to be takeout. 

“Hey! Sorry to bother ya, I just wanted to introduce myself- I just moved in next door.”

He turns around and although it’s quick, you notice his blue eyes take in your appearance. Your entire appearance. Just what you wanted. A charming but genuine smile crosses his lips, nearly making you swoon. “Oh, hey there! Sorry, I’ve been meaning to come by to say hi. Work’s been crazy this week, though, hence-” he pauses to nod towards the bag, “- Chinese for dinner tonight, no time to cook.” He sets the bag down by the door, though, coming over to you and extending his hand. “I’m Andy.”

Now it’s your turn to eye the perfectly form fitting outfit he’s wearing, that coat, the button down shirt with the sleeves rolled up, the tie, the dress pants. “You must work somewhere fancy, huh?” you tease (even though you already know). Shaking his hand, you reply, “Y/N. Nice to finally meet you!” 

He laughs, and the mere noise in itself is arousing. It’s so warm and deep, you want to hear more of it. “I’m an assistant district attorney. And it’s very nice to meet you, too.” You swear you catch a bit of an emphasis on that “very”, and you smile up at him biting your lip. “I’ll let you get back to dinner, I’m sure your family must be waiting.”

“Actually,” he sighs, looking back towards the door before looking at you, “it’s just me tonight. My son, Jacob- he’s at his mom’s place for the weekend.” He suddenly tilts his head. “Would you wanna join me, actually? I got way too much food, to be honest. Got a little overexcited when I was looking at that menu.”

You can’t believe how lucky you are- sure, you wanted to get to know your incredibly cute neighbor, but you never thought it would happen so fast and so smoothly. “Really? You’re sure? Because that sounds great.” You smile, brushing a strand of your hair behind your ear. “I still have, like, no food at home. I’ll just go take a quick shower first, I’m kinda gross and sweaty right now.” You laugh, and he chuckles too. “Gross? No way. But yeah, sure, come on over whenever you’re ready- I’ll leave the door unlocked.” He gives you a smile and you return it, trying not to look as eager as you are as you turn back to your house to get ready. 

Dinner with Andy is amazing. The two of you sit at his dining table and talk the night away, chatting about everything under the sun. He’s a perfect gentleman, always offering a drink the second yours is finished, urging you to eat more, and not even taking any phone calls while he’s in the middle of conversation with you. After eating, the two of you decide to watch a movie together- it’s Friday night, after all, neither of you have anywhere to be the next morning.

You’re walking to the living room when you notice a family photo on the credenza. “Is this Jacob? And your… ex wife?” you question, picking it up and observing it with interest. “It’s a really cute photo.” He looks over and nods, barely smiling though shrugging slightly. “Yeah. It was taken kinda recently, actually. Laurie and I divorced not too long after…”

“How are you doing with all of that?” you ask softly, coming over to the living room and sitting down on the couch. He aims the remote at the television, currently working on finding the movie you guys had decided on. “Honestly? Fine. Our marriage was a little messy for a while. I think in a way, I was always bracing myself for this to happen.” You listen to him somewhat curious, wondering how on Earth a woman could just let herself lose a man like him. He’s practically sex on legs. 

“So are ya dating again?” you ask playfully, and he glances at you amused. “Hmm. Wouldn’t you like to know,” he replies in jest, and you laugh, nibbling on your lower lip. “I guess you’re not. I doubt a girlfriend would be very happy you invited the new neighbor half your age into your home for dinner alone, hm?” you muse with a smirk, and he scoffs in amusement. “Excuse me? Half my age?” He suddenly pauses and shakes his head playfully. “You know what? Don’t elaborate on that, you’re probably right. But yeah, I’m not seeing anyone right now.” 

“That’s kind of surprising.” You blurt out, unable to help yourself. You’ve always had the tendency to speak your mind. “You’re, like, the most attractive guy I’ve met here.” He blinks in surprise but chuckles lowly, pressing play before coming to sit next to you. “Well. Thank you. And to think my son told me I had to step up my game.” You laugh softly, biting on your lip somewhat mischievously. “Yeah, I think you’re definitely doing just fine…”

He looks down at you, his expression suddenly becoming a little more serious. You’re practically lost in his deep blue eyes, staring back up at him as your heart begins to pound a little. It’s definitely happening. You can feel it. Whether this was always his intention or not, you’re unsure, but you know he wants you just as badly as you want him. 

It all happens so fast. His hands are grabbing your waist and pulling you onto his lap, his lips against yours in a furiously heated kiss, his arms wrapping entirely around you to keep you close to his body. You kiss him back now straddling his lap comfortably, your hands already lunging for the buttons of his shirt to push it off. His grunts of arousal are turning you on more and more, showcasing his absolute need and hunger; it’s clear he's been deprived ever since his divorce, and you’re more than happy to give him what he’s been ravenous for. You let him pull your top off, adjusting yourself so you can remove your shorts. He pulls back and stares at your half naked body, already panting. 

“Fuck. I forgot how sexy girls your age are,” he mumbles as his eyes rake over your figure, hands running up your waist to squeeze your breasts through your bra before traveling down to dig his fingers into your ass. “So damn tight and perky in all the right places…” You giggle breathlessly, unbuckling his belt as you lick your lips. “I think you’ll find I have a lot more… enthusiasm, too.” 

You slowly slide off him, getting down onto your knees in between his legs. He looks shocked but pleasantly surprised when you push down his pants and briefs, his teeth digging into his lower lip in anticipation when you curl your fingers around his thick length. You can’t help but stare a little, somewhat intimidated by his shaft though excited at the same time. Looking up at his expression, you barely smirk. “What’s wrong, Andy? Your ex-wife didn’t like to get down on her knees for you?” You use your other hand to rub his thigh slowly as if to comfort him, leaning down to give his tip little kitten licks. “Mm… because I’d do it for ya anytime…”

He lets out a groan, bucking his hips already in greed. “Fuck, don’t tease, Y/N. You did enough of that today standing outside my house in that tiny little bra and those tight pants.” He mutters through clenched teeth, and you blink before giggling lightly, pumping his base. “Oh? You were checking me out even then, huh?” 

“Of course I was… who wouldn’t be?” he growls, suddenly reaching out and grabbing a fistful of your hair, jerking your head forward. “Suck my damn dick already, honey, I want to fuck the back of your goddamn throat…” 

You gasp slightly but feel the wetness pool between your legs upon the pet name and dirty talk, immediately leaning forward to wrap your lips around him. You’ve never wanted to please someone so bad. He’s older, much older, and all you want to do is impress him. You bob your head up and down as your tongue swirls around his length, enjoying the sounds of his pleasured grunts and groans, looking up to see his eyes practically half shut. “Shit. You’re doing so good, honey, so… fucking good.” He hisses, clenching your hair tighter as he bucks his hips upwards. “Keep going, just like that…”

You feel his cock hitting the back of your throat, your coughs muffled from how full your mouth is. You don’t want to stop, though. You want to do everything you can to please him, to show him just what a good neighbor you are. You keep sucking, peering up at him through hooded eyes, moving your tongue skillfully to draw him closer to his edge. “Oh… oh, fuck…!” he growls, his grip on your hair tightening. “Oh, baby, I’m gonna cum…”

He releases down your throat, his shoulders finally dropping as he releases his hold on your hair. You hum happily as you swallow his load, gasping for air immediately after, your chest heaving up and down. He scoffs in awe as he stares down at you, nibbling on his lip hungrily. “You look so good taking my cock like that, honey. But I want to taste you now.” 

You squeak in surprise when he hoists you up, carrying you upstairs and to his bedroom with ease. You don’t even have time to look around before he tosses you down onto the bed on your back, crawling over and leaning down to leave a trail of kisses all the way from your collarbone, over the tops of your breasts, down your stomach and to the hem of your panties. He playfully bites on the lace to lower them down, making you giggle breathlessly. He stares at your soaked pussy, his blue eyes practically a shade darker from lust. “Look at you. All pretty and wet just for me,” he murmurs, voice dripping with fervor. “Taste me,” you whine, shivering slightly from the cool air now upon your entrance, arching your back desperately. “Please, Andy, I want you to tongue fuck me so bad.” 

He groans just from hearing you. “What a naughty girl. I can’t believe how lucky I am you moved in right next door.” He smirks and leans in, swiping his tongue across your dripping folds. You whine slowly as your eyes flutter shut, fingers grasping the bedsheets. “Mm… something tells me I’ll be here just as much as… at my house…”

“I think so too.” His voice is low and husky, his sharp features displaying nothing but carnal hunger. He nibbles teasingly around the edges of your entrance before pushing his tongue inside, hands gripping your thighs to keep your legs spread apart. Plunging in and out, spitting once to create more wetness and saliva, his tongue travels all over and laps up everything it can get. He’s grunting to himself in enjoyment, his lips even finding your clit as he sucks on it carefully but excitedly, his fingers wrapping behind to squeeze your ass. You can’t help but moan loudly, your breaths airy and uneven, the occasional gasp coming out accompanied by pitchy and pleasured hums. “Andy…!”

“Mm… mmm…. so good…” he mumbles to himself in between, his tongue working your clit and wet core expertly and sending you closer and closer over the edge. “Oh! Ooh… I’m… I’m close…!” 

You finally release and he happily cleans you all up, exhaling deeply as a satisfied smirk crosses his lips. He pulls back only to come lay next to you, his bare chest moving up and down with his irregular breaths and his fluffy brown hair now slightly tousled from his head in between your thighs. You look up at him with an amused and breathless smile, raising an eyebrow playfully innocent as you whisper, “Did I taste good…?”

“Incredibly.” He answers with a low scoff, suddenly rolling over to face you and throwing his arm around you. “You make the perfect dessert. And I think I’m going to want you every night.”

“Well, it’s a good thing I’m right next door…”