#together like the glowing just does something y'know?

[nonushu]

jealousy's a disease - choe hansol

genre: fluff, bestfriends to ???...🥺😊 | wc: 840 | non-idol!vernon x reader a/n: ok fineeeeee i'll stop writing for vernon now haha...

you hate him for this. you hate the way he sits there so beautifully, so blissfully, making you gawk at him—does he even know? does he know how his skin glows in the sun, or how gracefully his lashes flutter? does he even know how-

"what?"

vernon's voice cuts you out of your trance, his body facing you on the other side of the couch. his headphones rest around his neck as he stares at you in concern.

you raise your eyebrows, confused. "what?"

"i dunno, you were just... looking at me weird," he says, narrowing his eyes.

"was i?" you say softly, putting your book down, "well, sorry, didn't mean to weird you out."

he blinks, those eyelashes fluttering, again. "nah, it's cool,"

you nod, feeling something subtle building as you pretend to read, flipping to a random page. but vernon catches the shift in your expression.

"you okay, though?"

you perk up at him, meeting his suspicious gaze. "why would i not be okay?"

"'cause you're being kinda weird," he tuts, removing headphones to place them on the table. "did i do something?"

you sigh, mirroring his movements, placing your book down next to his headphones. "i don't know, vernon. did you?"

"well, no..." he mumbles, clearly muddled, "did you do something?"

"what? no," you scoff, feeling a little flustered. "no one did anything."

a pause falls over the room as the two of you stare at each other, the tension almost palpable. vernon shifts awkwardly before speaking again. “do you… not want me to stay anymore? i can leave if-”

“no!” you blurt out, your body instinctively inching closer to him on the couch. “why would you think that?”

“i don’t know!” he says, raising his hands defensively. “i just thought you were staring at me because you were getting sick of me or something.”

your heart skips a beat at his words, the sudden rush of panic rising. because the last thing you want is for him to leave.

"i wasn't," you quickly say.

he tilts his head. "okay... then what's wrong? you're acting..."

you open your mouth to respond but nothing comes out. how do you even explain it? how do you tell him how he makes you spiral from just being... him?

you cautiously reach your hand to face, finger lingering over his eye. you can see how his brown orbs widen at your sudden closeness as you softly touch his lashes. "has anyone ever told you that you have lashes to die for?"

vernon's breath hitches, his eyes fluttering. his lips part at the comfort of your touch. "uh," he mumbles, blinking rapidly when you pull your hand away. a faint blush creeps his neck, and he lets out a nervous chuckle. "n-no? that was kinda random."

you smile even though your heart races. "well, consider yourself blessed by the gods. i'm a little jealous..."

"of my eyelashes?" he asks, deadpanned.

"yeah..." you say quietly, "i don't know what you did in your past life to be so treasured."

he scoffs, “yeah, okay," he says, shaking his head with a playful smile. "i’m not sure i’ve ever been called ‘treasured’ before.”

you lean back against the couch, trying to steady your breath, and vernon watches you with a growing curiosity.

“is that what’s been bothering you?” he teases, his smile widening. “my lashes are just too nice?”

you glance at him, a bit annoyed by how easily he brushes it off. “maybe,” you murmur, though you both know it’s more than that.

"or," vernon’s smile falters, and his eyes narrow slightly like he’s starting to piece things together. "you're just jealous of my charms.”

you blink, caught off guard by his bluntness. “what? no, I didn’t say-”

“y'know, y/n, jealousy’s a disease,” he interrupts, grinning again, though there’s something softer in his gaze now, like he’s not entirely joking anymore. “do you need me to take you to the hospital? or should I call someone?”

you roll your eyes, feeling flustered. “don’t be stupid. i’m not actually jealous.”

but vernon doesn’t let it go, leaning closer, his eyes twinkling with mischief. “oh, but you kinda are, though. and I don’t think it’s just about my lashes.”

you can feel your face heating up under his stare, and your pulse quickens. “i don’t know what you’re talking about,” you mutter, crossing your arms.

he’s closer now, his tone gentler. “i think you do.”

your heart pounds in your chest, the playful banter suddenly taking a turn you didn’t expect. you meet his gaze, and the teasing light in his eyes fades, replaced by something else.

and in that moment, you realize: you’re not just jealous of his lashes, his effortless charm, or how everyone seems to adore him. scratch that, you're not even jealous! (maybe just a smidge).

maybe its the fact that he might not feel the same way you do.

but as vernon’s hand brushes against yours, his fingers lingering just a little longer than necessary, you wonder if maybe—just maybe—he does.

[t-u-i-t-c]

they did this for me

[sailing-through-hawkins]

✧ sequel to my vampire eddie microfic because i had the urge to write a scene from steve's pov and make it super sweet so have 1k of a fluffy morning after ✧

Everything is so warm.

Steve rubs his nose deeper into the sheets with a content sigh, basking in the glow of a soft morning.

"What are you still doing here?!"

Blearily, Steve pulls his eyes open, slowly shifting in place to survey the room around him. He's alone, which is a major bummer, he's gonna have to dock points from Eddie for that. Then again, he muses as he looks over the clothes that are hanging from everywhere, including on top of the ceiling fan, maybe a few points don't matter much when he's definitely up in the hundreds already.

Oh shit, that's the brand new outfit, the one he and Robin spent hours agonizing over before their night out, thrown across the floor, isn't it? Fuck.

"Be polite, he's a guest -"

Steve stretches out his back, lifting his sore arms up towards the sky where his hands brush against the muscle tee, the one on the ceiling fan, that Eddie was wearing last night. Oh, now there's an idea.

With a smirk, Steve pulls the tee down and onto himself, fluffing out his hair and hoping today is one of those days he can pull off the bedhead look.

"Eddie?" he calls out softly as he steps out of the bedroom, rubbing at one of his eyes, the one on the side that was squished up against Eddie all night (well, not all night...).

"Stevie!"

His voice is loud and happy, far more chipper than Steve expected from a vampire after a long night. He blinks, looking up to see Eddie beaming at him with flour dusting his hair and a whisk in one hand. The sunlight filters through with the shades to cast lines of light across him and with the way he's smiling, Steve doesn't think he's ever seen a prettier sight.

"I was just making breakfast for you, I wasn't sure if you were a morning person but I figure, y'know, sun-kissed skin and whatnot, it'd make sense if you were -"

He can't help it, Steve lets out a giggle, something small and light, something he used to never let himself have. But Eddie's smile makes it so worth it. Steve smiles back shyly, gliding in closer and stroking a hand up Eddie's arm (he's wearing a different shirt, maybe he took it out of his closet?). "You're making me breakfast?"

The vampire sighs dreamily as he looks into Steve's eyes, his fangs peeking out from his dopey little smile. There's so much flour in his hair, did he forget to tie it up before starting to cook? "Yeah..."

"That's so sweet," Steve coos, bringing his hands up to cup Eddie's face, pull him in closer and nuzzle their noses together. "Thank you, Eds."

He slowly opens his eyes and stifles back a giggle at how desperately cute Eddie's expression is, eyes flickering between Steve's face and his own shirt, cheeks flushed pink with Steve's blood. He has a feeling that if vampires had tails, Eddie's would be wagging uncontrollably right now.

"So, what're you making me?" he whispers, dragging his nose down the curve of Eddie's jaw, breathing in his scent of iron and cranberries (did he have some juice? or does blood just smell like cranberries on a vampire?).

"I - uh, ha -" Eddie swallows and Steve tracks the motion with the bridge of his nose, peeking up over Eddie's shoulder to look at -

"Shit, is that the time?!"

"Wha -"

Steve shoves himself away from Eddie, rushing back into the bedroom and slamming the door shut. He frantically pulls off the tee (goodbye cozy morning, sigh) and grabs his skirt from last night - no stains on it, or on his top, thank fuck.

"Stevie?"

"Gimme a sec!" Steve calls out, crawling out from under the bed with his shoes in hand. Fuck, fuck, fuck, how did it get so late, Robin's gonna be so mad -

"What's -"

"I'm so sorry, Eddie!" Steve yanks the door open, guilt curdling up his insides when he sees Eddie waiting outside his own bedroom door with a hopeful-turned-distressed expression. He walks past him, hopping on one leg as he puts a shoe on. "I have a thing I need to get to, I honestly forgot until I saw the time -"

"Pfft, likely story," a random voice says.

He spins to stare at the sofa, where three people are strewn about, legs and arms overlapping each other. Only one of them is awake, a bleary-eyed, wavy-haired guy that's glaring at Steve.

"Shoulda thought of that excuse before he started nagging at us."

"It's not an excuse," Steve snaps, finally managing to get his second shoe on. "I have brunch -"

"Told you, dude," the guy lazily rolls his eyes over to Eddie, sending a hot flash of anger through Steve.

"Oh fuck you," he hisses, pointedly grabbing Eddie's hand (the one without the whisk, why is he still holding it?) and pulling him in closer. He glares at Eddie, who's staring at him with big doe eyes, softening at the gaze. "I'm really sorry I can't stay, Eds."

"But...waffles?" he says quietly, like he's confused, like Steve isn't making any sense.

And he isn't, not really, but he can't afford to be late to the Robin-and-Steve-Monthly-Gossip-Brunch after they both missed the past two months already, third time's the charm and he does not want to find out what that charm would be for.

"I'm sorry," he says again, wincing when Eddie visibly deflates. Steve presses a kiss to the corner of his mouth, just so he doesn't get distracted and lose even more time, and pats his chest. "I was really looking forward to breakfast with you."

A little bit of shine comes back to Eddie's eyes, flickering over from Steve to the window. He speeds away, whisk clattering somewhere in the kitchen, as Steve blinks and suddenly he's back, holding up his leather jacket towards Steve with a shy smile.

"'S cold out. Take my jacket?" Eddie asks and Steve pulls him in, flour-hair and all, for the deepest, filthiest kiss he can give, swallowing down his gasp, his moan and every last sliver of his minty breath.

"Thanks, babe." Steve whispers, pulling the jacket on (at least it makes up for the muscle tee failure) and relishing in the warmth. He opens the front door, presses one final, chaste kiss to Eddie's lips and walks out, the smell of cranberries sticking to his skin.

Eddie watches Steve leave in his jacket with a sigh, already longing for that pretty voice to say "Eds" to him again.

"You know," Gareth says from the couch, which pops the blissful balloon Eddie was happily floating in. He turns to glare at his three friends, all lounging on the couch even after he told them to be presentable. Gareth continues, "You know, you could have offered to drop him off. He'd get there faster and you'd get more time with him too. I mean, did you even get his number?"

Silence. Then -

"Fuck!"

[kairiscorner]

Hear me out (req but for the love of GOD take ur time :>)

Surveying universes with miggy

And u see a sibling reality of the one u two currently exist in,,,, except

Ur

All

Cats

Bonus pag,,, u two are a family with a little kitty gabriella

AH AHHHHHHHH AWHHHHHHH ate ur giving me a distraction from school i lavet

(reblogs are greatly appreciated, it helps get my content out there! if you guys like what you see, please reblog it too <:D)

traveling to other universes with miggy (kitty dimension) – miguel o'hara x reader

"alright, where're we off to now, mig?" you asked miguel as you peered over his broad shoulder, trying to get a peek at his watch. "slow your roll, i'm looking." "uh, actually, i'm looking." lyla quipped as miguel rolled his eyes. "yes, yes, fine, lyla's looking. just wait for a minute, it'll come up." he said as you both watched the AI assistant hop from one point of the multiverse to the other. she finally stopped at one point of the multiversal map and smiled widely. "i think you'd like it there, you'll make mig love it there, i know you will." she suggested to you with a smirk as you instinctively smiled back to her in excitement.

"right, then, let's not waste any time." you declared with a sweet smile as miguel pondered on what lyla was insinuating. lyla opened up a portal to that dimension, you merrily stepped in while miguel cautiously took a step in, following you in the portal; when you two stepped in...

"what...?" you said aloud as you looked around you left and right–you couldn't find miguel anywhere, but what you did find was astoundingly... furry? you saw a furry family walking home together to their quaint little home; they were the o'purra's, as the sign to their doorstep read. you snuck around their and rounded the back to see not only a light coming from their backdoor, but miguel was there, too.

you watched him looking into the little window, his gaze not moving away from there as he focused his sights on the little furry family having dinner in their little home. you joined him silently as you peered into the glowing glass panes, joining the furry family as they ate at their dinner table without them noticing. they were all cats in the household, with a bigger, furrier cat who seemed to be the father helping his little kitten daughter out with her math homework.

"i did it, papa! i did it!" she exclaimed as she set her pencil down and smiled up at her cat father. he nodded and smiled back at his daughter, petting the top of her head–at the in between of her perked up cat ears–her little kitten ears perking up and her big, wide eyes were sparkling at her father's affectionate touch. "alright, alright, that's very good, kiddo." said the cat father, who eerily sounded a lot like... "i remembered something like this happening to me." miguel murmured in a soft voice, his hands on the window pane as he watched the cat father and kitten daughter hug. the father's fur had the same color and miguel's hair, and the exact same hue as his eyes; the kitten daughter looked similar to the cat father, but smaller and sweeter. you chuckled at the sight of the affectionate father-daughter duo.

"they make a good team, i'm... wow, lyla was right; this world's perfect! society run by cats? that's a society i'd live in for the rest of my life, no offense to the spider society, though, y'know." you said with a slight giggle. "anyway... is it just me or does that cat dad look a little like–" "don't even start." miguel interrupted you with a low, monotonous voice as he shut his eyes and lowered his head a little, resting his forehead against the glass.

you looked at miguel, perplexed that he claimed an event like that occurred to him, and at his... his sudden desire to not want to engage in conversation about this anymore. but before you could ask him what he meant, turning your head around to face him–you witnessed the glistening of his eyes as the tears welled up in those hazel brown orbs of his; the very same ones that glowed as the cat father was being tugged by his daughter by the paw to the dinner table. you then heard yet another familiar voice to you, it was... your own voice speaking, but not out of your mouth, it was out of the other cat parent present, readying dinner for the three of them.

you gazed at the loving family, listened to their lovely purrs of appreciation for the food present and for each other as they began to sit down, dig in, and... just go about their day. it shouldn't have affected you this much, right? to see a bunch of cats that happened to sound like you and miguel with a variant of his daughter; it was so cute at first, but then it just... it made you ache for something, long for something you've never had before. "they're just cats, don't... don't get affected." miguel muttered as he shook his head, as if to shake the tears and the sentimentality of this life that seemed way too familiar to him in cat form was playing out. "stay on high alert, the anomaly's gonna wreak havoc sooner or later, and we can't let it hurt these... felines." he finished as his mask soon concealed his face, giving him a scowl for an appearance as he donned on the dark blue and red accented mask and began to walk away.

you wanted to say something to him, reach out to him–do anything to console him for this despondency he was experiencing to stay in this dimension any longer than you two should after witnessing what used to be the life he lived, and practically stole from some version of him, unfold yet again in feline form. you sighed as you watched him swing off to the nearest scratching post, with you taking one last look at the lovely family the cat versions of you two shared, and the lovely daughter you two had, took care of, and raised together.

you bid that family farewell as you shot your web at the same scratching post and swung off into the night, throwing yourself back in the damned routine you were so used to; that you tired of and wished... wished you could live a life like your cat counterpart. you desperately wished that you could just be at peace and with your loved ones–and that got you thinking, was there a version of you that found happiness? and if so... could you maybe... be there, even for a little bit, even if miguel didn't want you to stay?

well, maybe. but in the meantime, it comforted you that even a cat version of you could live one of its nine lives being comfortable, happy, and fulfilled being a co-parent with a cat father that was very reminiscent of... a man you thought you knew very well. this gave you hope, just a sma sliver of it, that you could one day attain the happiness and peaceful life you so desired.

[hollideon]

soothing tongue — knifeplay, aftercare, that robot has A Thing for blood

///

warm, wet, a bit abrasive. stinging, but in a comforting way. Bree's synthetic tongue glides slow across the open wounds on your back; short and shallow slices she herself left. you can't help but gasp and writhe, just a little bit, under the sensation.

"stop squirming, i need to make sure they're cleaned properly." firm, but still a bit teasing.

"are you sure this is part of it or do you secretly run on blood?" you ask, alternating between gasps and giggles.

sitting on the bed behind you, she tends to your back. you shudder as her razor-sharp metal talons play across your sliced-up skin. leftover combat hardware, she'd said. tame compared to the stuff they didn't let her keep. Bree — short for Breach and Clear, you've learned — was a field synth, a purpose-made combat android. lithe but still tall and imposing. metal and silicon and carbon fiber, she makes you feel especially fragile.

"my hardware doesn't, but it does give me something to get out of bed for." she says this jokingly, but you can hear the underlying hunger in her artificial voice. her tongue returns to your wounds and you gasp as the abrasive surface pulls on the edges of a particularly cruel cut. she slows herself though, caressing the aggravated wound with slow, gentle licks. the pain melts away.

"y-yeah but why do you have to lick them? they make you with antibacterial spit? sorry if that's um, a weird question."

her tongue pulls away, ever so slowly. "not at all, it's just like show and tell." she winks, like the iris of a camera. "it's simple really, just flush out the synthetic saliva and put a canister of antibacterial solution in instead."

"hehe, sounds like you've done this before."

"once or twice. i scare most humans off... and y'know, other synths don't bleed." she doesn't bother to hide the hunger in her voice now. Bree's tongue having not returned to your cuts, you turn your head to look up, behind you. even seated she looms above there, angular metal body glinting in the low light. the red glow of her eyes bore into you. tall and inhuman. a literal weapon. some part of your brain posits that this view of her is probably the last thing a lot of people ever saw.

"m-more for me," you stutter out, forcing a chuckle in an attempt to purge that moment of genuine fear from your mind.

"oh?~ you want more, do you?" her voice practically drips with sadism and those claws again dance ever so lightly down your sensitive back.

"pleeeease," you can't help but whine.

"cute, but you've had enough for today. besides," she says with another antibacterial lick, "i'm nearly done cleaning you up."

you continue melt under the care of her tongue, taking its time to give each and every cut and scratch the care it needs. stinging and soothing. so warm. though it felt strange at first, now you can't imagine a greater comfort.

a short time later, you and Bree sit together on your apartment's little balcony, your wounds properly cleaned and bandaged. the night air is cold — you share a blanket, though she doesn't need it.

[spnbaby-67]

Under the Montana Skies

Just a little one shot I came up with after I saw this cute set made by @deanwinchesterswitch. She does amazing works and I can't thank you enough for letting me use it for this one shot. I personally love it.

Pairing: Beau Arlen x Reader.

Summary: none needed,

Warnings; Just Beau Himself. (lol)

The air was crisp and filled with the scent of pine as you stood outside Beau Arlen's trailer in the heart of Montana. You and Beau had been friends for years, but lately, something had shifted between you two. The tension in the air was palpable, and tonight, under the starry Montana sky, it was finally time to address it.

Beau, with his rugged charm and flannel shirt, looked at you with those piercing green eyes. "You know, darlin', I've been wantin' to do this for a long time," he said, his voice a low drawl that sent shivers down your spine.

You nodded, feeling your heart race as the two of you walked hand in hand to a cozy spot he had set up outside his trailer. A blanket was spread out on the ground, with a small campfire crackling nearby. The stars overhead were like a million diamonds scattered across the midnight canvas.

Sitting down together, you couldn't help but steal glances at each other. The fire's warm glow danced across Beau's face, highlighting the rugged features you had come to adore. He reached into a cooler nearby and pulled out a couple of beers, offering one to you. You accepted it with a grateful smile.

As you both sipped your drinks, a comfortable silence settled over you, interrupted only by the sounds of crickets chirping in the distance. You scooted closer to Beau, your shoulders brushing against his. He turned to you, his eyes filled with a mix of longing and uncertainty.

"Y'know," he began, "I've been thinkin' 'bout this night for a long time. Montana's always been my special place, and sharin' it with you... well, that's somethin' I've wanted for even longer."

Your heart swelled with emotion as you leaned in, your lips gently pressing against his. The kiss was soft and tender, but it spoke volumes about the depth of your feelings for each other. Beau's arms wrapped around you, pulling you closer as the world around you faded into obscurity, leaving only the two of you and the Montana stars above.

As the night wore on, you and Beau shared stories and dreams by the campfire, the sparks of the fire mirroring the sparks between your hearts. The two of you gazed up at the vast expanse of the night sky, fingers intertwined, and made wishes on shooting stars.

Eventually, the chill of the Montana night crept in, and Beau wrapped you in his flannel shirt, holding you close to his chest for warmth. The stars remained, a silent witness to the love that had blossomed between you two.

Underneath the canopy of twinkling stars, you and Beau Arlen had found something precious—a love that was as vast and timeless as the Montana sky itself.

@deans-baby-momma

@deanwinchesterswitch

@nancymcl

[vexing-imogen]

I Do What I Must

There is a difference, Athena thinks, between desire and intention. Did she want to kill Calliope? Certainly not. Goddess of War she may be, but she is not the bloodthirsty brute that Ares was. Idol blood was precious and she would not spill a drop unless absolutely necessary.

Intent, however? Yes, killing Calliope had been her intention. And she'd succeeded as she often did. It should have worked perfectly. The others would have been angry at first, to be sure. But with Apollo's help explaining the prophecy, and the benefit of time, they would have seen that she was right. That she had only done what she did for the good of the people she had sworn an oath to protect.

If only Calliope had been willing to accept her fate. If only she had not gotten Grace involved.

In any other circumstance, Athena would have been delighted to welcome Grace as the new Muse. She was clever, she was charming. In just a few short days, she'd sent waves through their little pond that would continue to ripple far after she was gone. Calliope could not have chosen better.

Athena does not want to kill Grace. But she does intend to.

"You summoned me, ma'am?" Hermes pops into her office; punctual, eager, and just a little skittish, as usual.

She smiles at them. "I did. I'd like to have a word with Grace," she says. "Just a little check-in, to see how her investigation is progressing. Could you bring her here? As quickly as you can."

Hermes salutes. "On it." Their eyes start to glow, but before they can open a portal, they bite their lip and turn back to her. "Um, Athena, ma'am? Can I ask you something?"

She raises an eyebrow, but nods and gestures for them to continue.

"Do you really think that Grace killed Cal?" they ask, scratching the back of their neck. "'cause it's just...I was there, right? Like, immediately after Calliope died, and Grace was just, like, freaked the fuck out. But not in the 'I just killed someone' way. More in the 'this chick just died in my arms and now I'm a god' kind of way. Y'know?"

It is only through multiple millennia of practice that Athena keeps the smile on her face. "Well, that is for her to prove, isn't it?" she says, watching them swallow hard. "But thank you for your insight."

They salute again, hand shaking, and they disappear through a portal mere seconds after.

Athena takes the time alone to observe her office. She adjusts the plate of cookies on her desk just so to make them more appealing. Her eyes find her dagger, hidden in plain sights. Nestled amongst Zeus' laurels, Hades' helm, and Demeter's scythe, it looks like just another relic of ancient times.

Her door glows gold and Grace steps through the portal, trying to hide that she's still rubbing sleep from her eyes. "Hey," she says, clearing her throat. "Hermes said that you wanted to talk about...stuff."

"That I do," Athena says. "Have a seat, Grace."

And so they talk. Or rather, Athena lets Grace talk. She knows much of what has occurred already, Bubo is such a talented scout, but she wants to hear it from Grace's perspective.

She is less worried about what Grace herself knows, the girl is blissfully unaware that she will not be leaving this office alive, but she needs information on the other Idols. Who might be having second thoughts, who might become a problem in the future...

There is a list in her mind as the conversation winds down (Persephone is at the very top. Grace doesn't seem to realize just how many times the goddess' name had cropped up as she talked.), but that is something for Athena to focus on later. For now...

"Have a cookie?" she suggests, nudging the plate forward.

Grace takes one with a shrug, her eyes widening when she bites into it. "Damn, that's good," she mumbles, The cookie is gone before she stands, and she doesn't make it three steps before she wobbles.

She stumbles into a shelf, knocking a few books to the ground, as she turns to stare at Athena. "You?" she asks, clearly trying to piece the evidence together through a drug induced fog.

Athena nods as she steps around her desk, taking the dagger as she does. Her free arm goes around Grace's back, holding the girl upright as she struggles to maintain consciousness. She feels a pang of sympathy as fingernails scrape ineffectually against her bracer. She looks so young like this; panicked and scrambling, a rabbit caught in a snare.

"I wish I didn't have to do this," she says gently, positioning the dagger between the third and fourth ribs; the quickest path to the heart. "But it's what the prophecy demands, Grace. We cannot go against Fate."

"Prophecy?" Grace's struggling starts to slow. "You don't-" Her words start to slur. "Please..."

Athena has to take a breath and remind herself that she is not at fault here. Calliope could have prevented this. She didn't have to seek Grace out, didn't have to pass her Eidolon to an unsuspecting mortal, didn't have to doom her to a shared fate.

The blade slides in so easily after that.

Grace lets out a whimpering cry, tears gathering in eyes that are beginning to glow gold. The faintest pulse of Calliope's Eidolon can be seen through her shirt, on the cusp of escaping, though Grace is fighting to keep it in.

Athena twists the dagger in Grace's chest, feeling and hearing bones crack as she does. Grace gasps, and then coughs up a mouthful of blood onto Athena's chiton.

There is a moment of peace as she watches the life fade from Grace's eyes, though the Eidolon remains stubbornly in her chest.

And then the rest of the Chorus bursts through her doors, and she has no time to react as three pairs of eyes pierce into her with anguish, horror, and fury.

She has a moment to regret her decision to keep potted plants as vines ensnare her and anchor her to the nearest wall. Aphrodite hurries to Grace, cradling the dying girl in her arms. Persephone's eyes dart between Grace and Athena, her expression caught somewhere between devastation and murder. Ultimately, she joins Aphrodite, curling over Grace as though to shield her from further harm. Her fingers shake as they caress a pale cheek.

Apollo stands frozen in the doorway. When he finally speaks, his voice is laden with guilt. "Athena, what did you do?"

She fights to answer as vines threaten to crush her trachea. "I did what had to be done."

[leonotlara]

The New V Part 2

Uzi finds herself missing V. Wishing she would come back. But be careful of what you wish for! (Post episode 7, Uzi isn't in space anymore, sorry about that.) But this time it's not a cliffhanger.

💜💛💜💛💜💛💜💛💜💛💜💛💜💛

"Uzi...?"

"V?!"

An ear-splitting silence rang, and everyone could hear it. The subjects looked at one another."Uzi!" V ran the small distance between them but came to a halt upon seeing her face. A face of fear. Like when they first met.

"Th-This has to be some sick joke.." The purple drone whimpered, "Right?!" She backed away, visor displaying hollowed-out eyes, screen glitching as her voice altered slightly. She had dreamt and longed for V for so long. Why did she now feel like she was living in a nightmare with her presence here?

Uzi shook slightly, wobbly legs slowly carrying her to the direction of the colony bunker, mind racing, and sensors heating up far too quickly for her liking. She looked up at her father, like a small and helpless child. Did he know about this? What about Thad? Or Lizzy? Or J? Wait... no, yeah, J would definitely do this to her.

"Did you do this?" She looked and pointed at J. As the female Disassembly Drone glared with a shake of her head, Uzi began theorising who did this. A long, defeaning silence fell on the group. A tiny crunch of the snow was heard, and V, looking bigger from Uzi's perspective, made her act quickly.

She flinched away the moment she saw V inching closer, who seemed startled at the sudden movement. Realising it was now or never, Uzi took off running as fast as she had come.

♤

Why had she come so quickly in the first place? She thought they found V's remains or some sort of part of her. Maybe a recording of her death. That would've made her calm down more than to see her back and polished. This wasn't the V she thought was there before the elevator fell. That V would be in ruins, not brand-new, and yet, she was there, outside the landing pod.

The hardest thing about this was the fact that Uzi could barely pinpoint how she felt about this, but the easiest way to learn how you feel about something is to understand it clearer.

First thing the next night, she will find J and ask her how V had been seemingly revived. She had to know.

She just had to.Staring upon the ceiling, the purple lights seem to be shining brighter on the photograph above her bed. Standing on her tiptoes, she reached up for it.

It was her and V having their first kiss together right after they came back from camp.

♤

"Come in." The voice drawled, the pod door creaked open. "What do you want?" The drone asked, her hand moved a strand of her bangs to see the one who opened the door.

"Is V here? Not that I really care, y'know I just..." Uzi took a deep breath before repeating the initial question. "Is V here?"

J looked at her, pausing from her writing on the notepad she had equipped on her hands, her expression of seriousness faltering into one of confusion. "Uh, yeah, she's just outside. You must have not noticed her when you went in. How did you not see her?"

"Oh.." Uzi sighed, taking a step backwards, her boot hitting the snow that blanketed the entirety of the planet.

Closing the door after a quick thanks, Uzi looked around the spire, from retracing her steps from the entrance, to craning her neck to look up at the ceiling, to the back, cobwebs in the corners.

Thump. Thump. Thump.

She wasn't there."V..?" Uzi uttered, her voice cracking. Never had she thought to say that name again.Well, she never thought any of this would happen, and yet, here she was!

There was a faint yellow light on the ceiling of the spire, squeezed in at the top. Calling her name out again, the glow blinked.

"V, please! Look, I.. I shouldn't have been so terrified... but you just came out of nowhere! Like, I am here, mourning over your stupid death, then you just pop back in?!" She yelled, stomping on the ground. "Like, who does that? No being eased into it? No evidence you're actually you? Not even an explanation? Nothing? Anything could've helped, but no, you just came back without any sort of heads-up! Just waltz back into my life after sacrificing yourself and an ominous 'Uzi I trust you'? Yeah, sure, whatever! Maybe I was better off without you! I never desperately needed you anyway! I never needed anyone to mess up my feelings! Especially not a fricken murderer! You should've just left! I'd have more peace, you stupid, inconsiderate-"

Silence.

The yellow light began shaking, shivering, and the glow disappeared, similar to eyes closing.

A sigh echoed off the walls, and Uzi's face had guilt written all over it.

"Look... V. I-I'm sorry... really am," She whispered, sitting atop the frigid snow, her voice shaky from the screaming. "and I totally get if you need time to recharge. I'll wait right here for you, the same way you always waited for me when I had my angsty teen outbursts..." she chuckled softly. As her vision dimmed, her eyes closuig slow enough to see the yellow glow opening up again quickly.

♤

The unfamiliar weight on her left side disappeared, falling instead upon her chest. Looking down, she felt her sensors heating up.

"Hey... V." Uzi smiled, giving her a hug. V's arms wrapped around her, both drones' internal fans working overtime from the sudden warmth threatening to overheat them, mimicking a cat's purr. Both girls were smiling so broadly their cheeks were aching, but it didn't matter.

"Aw…" V's voice came out in a soft laugh. It was nice to hear it again without being deathly afraid of it.

Uzi's eyes hollowed for a split second, remembering what she said to V a few hours prior. Guilt overtook her again, her chest tightening so bad she felt like she was crumpled up.

"Uzi-"

"I'm so sorry. I should've calmed down, I should've just taken control of my emotions, I should've - "

"Hey, hey..." she grazed Uzi's cheek with her hand. Though it was a cold metal, it felt as if it was actively melting it off.

"It's okay."

"I forgive you."

...

One question remained, however. How did V come back polished and new in the first place?

When Uzi voiced her thought to V, she bit her lip, almost as if she was avoiding the question.

"Well, it seemed that Cyn had copies of the Disassembly Drones floating in pods around the exoplanets. This means she can replace us whenever. She must've had us on auto-replacing, though, so whenever we break, a new one will fly here with all the memories we had before."

…

"I couldn't have come earlier, I'm so sorry, I couldn't. It was out of my control."

"It's fine. The important thing is that you're back.

"They interlocked fingers that were resting on the snow."It's good to have you back."

[eldritch-spouse]

Pinnie, MAGUS is my dear darling. He is so fucking terrifying and that fries my fight or flight response so fckn much. He rubs my brain good and I will proceed to provoke a hyperfixation on him for the time being. (You can put all my Magus asks together dw, if you find them xD)

1. I meant for Magus to feed me, not feed me. Y'know, Vesper style.

2. I wanna see shiny fishes and cool ocean fishes with my horror of the deep bf.

3. Glauk is bestie material, I will play along w/ him like a fucking clown to entertain Magus.

4. Imagine telling Magus that humans eat but small ocean dwellers like shrimp and crabs (but boiled) Or telling Magus what seasoning is xD

5. If you have thought that far yet, how is their dick? Is it one of the tendrils like some octopi? Or is their slit like normal? 1 or 2? (Feel free to ignore if you haven't gone that far yet, or jump it)

6. Will Magus allow a threesome w/ Santi?

7. Imma grab any part of him as soon as he is near me, istg, I have fear of drowning (but the horny is stronger) in fact, I will hug whatever is closest bc my life depends on it. Doggy style is supposed to be a fucking position not my lifeline to survive in the ocean.

8. DOES MAGUS EYES GLOW IN THE DARK? DOES ANY PART OF HIM DOES? OMG FLORESCENT DICK /J

9. I will offer Magus my soul for a kiss, open that mouth boo. Imma declare my love to him instantly, I'll be cheesy and awkward bc that is a classic me move. And maybe ruin the mood but hey, the offer still stands, and sweat can't be sensed underwater.

9.1? Would I be doing harm to Magus if I kiss stain his face? Would he let me?

10. How would Magus react to Glauk approaching/walking(swimming?) in while he is fucking us?

[An essay, hmmm. I'm putting several more small mer asks under the cut.]

1) I understood, I just wasn't feeling it too much.

3) Glauk is a good mer to bother if you want to know more about Magus. They're genuine friends, even if Magus is oftentimes too much of a nasty grump to be nicer to Glauk.

4) He's vaguely disgusted by the concept of burning food, but he'll sooner come around to the concept of seasoning as a whole. You can introduce him to brand new flavors! Although he hates sweetness.

5) See this ask.

Magus is packing something quite long, as is necessary for his species. There is no way you'll ever fit all of that inside you, not even if he was shrunk to your level. It's very slippery and wriggling and looks almost ribbon-like. In great contrast to the rest of his body, it glows brightly in the water. Magus' orgasms are lengthy and your little body definitely can't handle it all.

6) Depends.

If the incubus presents himself in a submissive manner, then yes. Magus will be in control and take both of you. Santi is to never leave any sort of mark on you (be it scratching, biting or bruising).

7) A tendril will do then.

8) Magus is a lot like Breg, in the sense that his eyes remain covered behind a membrane like patch of skin. They don't glow.

9) He may not scent sweat very easily, but provided you're still sweating, he might taste it.

9.1) Magus won't stop you, but he'll automatically clean his face afterwards. Not with his tongue, the products you apply taste distinctly awful. He doesn't like them much, but the huge mer understands they're some type of land-dweller mating display. Sometimes.

10) If Magus is in heat, then he'll automatically stop and shield you, letting go to quickly give chase and possible eviscerate Glauk. However, it's hard to miss the scent of a mermonster in rut, so Glauk absolutely steers clear of his larger friend.

During standard periods, neither Glauk nor Magus will be bothered if the other walks in on sex, though this doesn't necessarily mean the other is invited to participate.

In his mouth.

He does have one.

What is any good way to survive a yandere? Generally, give into their affections.

The more submissive and cooperative you are in key moments, the more they're willing to learn how to accommodate you.

*Magus

Usually, I don't care when anons mangle my characters' names, it's even become a bit of a joke.

However, there's a Magnus floating around that I did not create, and I don't want people to get confused.

[cidandy]

mmm......chips stimming headcanons........headcanons for how i think some of the chips would stiiimmm

bert is an avid vocal stimmer i think. he makes little noises & stuff & says random phrases...based on his twitter because of how many times he just. tweets out his own name. bro stims like a pokemon /silly. also playing with the zipper on his jacket & stuufff also the fidget cube!!! hell yeah!!!

for dandy i think he doesn't really...stim very outwardly. but i think he probably plays with/pulls at his own hair & clothes & stuff. maybe the little dangling bits from the part that's tied to his arm. also the kind of guy to unbutton & rebutton the same button on his shirt a bunch of times. i don't know if that's just a thing that i do but i hope you know what i mean.

dee meows. i think they meow when they're excited :^3c i also think they knead random stuff like a cat. just subconsciously kneading at stuff with nice textures. i think they like feeling soft stuff.

i think spencer would like. this is hard to explain but he would move his shapes around & stuff...like he can change his form & stuff so. i also think he gets extra glow-y when excited or happy :^) probably makes his own stim toys out of little holograms LOL

vosim...where do u even start with vosim. i mean the whole spoon thing is literally just him stimming. like when he clinks them together & stuff. also i think he does the classic hand flapping & rocking back & forth. also i think he makes noises too, like a vvvvmmmm sound y'know. because he's a crunchy synthy voice :^3c also stares at bath bombs for hours at a time.

cider masks super hard most of the time. but he paces so much. SOOO MUCH PACING. like all the time. can't stand in one place for too long without getting antsy. also a hand flapper. i mean- how could you not be with 4 hands. also i think he messes with the wires that dangle from the extra arm things. i think he's the kind of dork to jump up & down when something makes him happy.

i'm pretty sure rotten "canonically" vocal stims by making those little clicky sounds. he's probably also pretty discreet with his stimming so he can seem all cool & tough. i think he also does a good amount of rocking, but a lot slower than vosim does. just a subtle thing. i also think he'd mess around with the collar of his jacket.

for saaaam :^D he would mostly just fidget with the cord on those headphones. & maybe the scarf too...

voder literally communicates through hissing noises. does that count as stimming? i dunno. i'll say it does.

PEDRO WOULD BITE SHIT. ALL SORTS OF STUFF. maybe even their own arm, which the others would have to remind them that it's not...safe to do that. they could probably use one of those chewy necklaces or something. probably also paces but it's less pacing & more like running around in circles.

[loguetowns]

when it happened

shanks x reader, sanji x reader

when they realize they're in love you

1k words

a/n: idk what possessed me to pair these two together but the heart wants to write what it wants and who am i to fight it

the flag is what shanks sees first, the thrice-scarred skull waving against the moonlight. next comes the ship embedded with his and his crew's blood, sweat and tears. its colossal size is a sight for sore eyes, especially compared to the dinky boat he's had to use.

but it doesn't feel like he's coming home until he sees a familiar silhouette race down the gangway, rushing towards him at a speed that only shooting stars could rival.

you run and you run, faster and faster, and shanks can't help but smile. he knows how lucky he is to have someone almost as excited as he is to come home.

how your hair catches wind, how starlight shines on your skin, and how your smile gets bigger as you get closer —

oh, how he's missed you.

"you're home!"

you hurl yourself at him, suddenly airborne when shanks lifts you off the ground. laughing, he spins you 'round and 'round with a strong hold on your waist.

it's amazing how right it feels to be embracing you like this, and shanks could never tire of this homecoming ritual of yours.

"hmm, maybe we should put a stop to this," he teases. "i feel like it keeps getting harder. you putting on weight or something?"

he sets you down with a playful smile, earning him an adorable scrunched nose in protest.

"don't be rude," you swat his arm. "maybe it's the fact that you only have one arm?"

"hmm, unlikely to be the case but that's all the more reason to stop doing this, eh. you're going to wear out my only good arm."

"bullshit," you say. "don't act like you hate this. i know you love it."

love.

love is what echoes in his mind as you pull him a little closer to you. love is what floods his veins when he meets you halfway, closing the distance until you're only a breath away from him.

your eyes reflect the heavens above, and the way the moon glows makes it looks like there's stardust on your cheeks. shanks takes in your pretty face up close, like a prisoner who's seen the sky for the first time in years.

and years is how long it's been since shanks can remember feeling this way — this warm, kindling, feel-it-in-your-bones affection.

shanks kisses you, sweet and true, and thinks to himself that if home is where the heart is then he's finally home.

"you're right," he whispers against your lips.

"it's love."

"you're up already?"

sanji looks up from the cutting board to find you standing in the doorway.

your hair is mussed and you're wearing your favourite t-shirt (aka his favourite t-shirt), thighs peeking from under the hem as you stretch. he fights a smile watching you try (and fail) to stifle a yawn but lets it go when you catch his eye and blush in embarrassment.

even half-asleep, sanji thinks you are the most adorable thing he's ever seen.

"i always wake up this early," he says, his hands return to the task at hand but his eyes stay locked on you. "breakfast for these goons needs a lot of prep, y'know."

"boo," you shuffle towards him. "why does it have to be you who always makes breakfast?"

"sweetheart, i'm the cook. that's kind of my job."

when you finally reach him, you wrap your arms to hug him from behind, careful not to disrupt his knife work. you can't see it, but sanji's expression is soft and warm, second only to a hug from his beloved.

"okay," your breath tickles him. "but it's also your job to cuddle me in the morning. so what are are we going to do about that?"

sanji laughs, the sound of it reverberating against your cheek. he puts his knife down to turns around, returning your embrace and holding you in his arms.

"what can i do to make it up to you?"

you glance up at him with sleepy eyes and the most loveable expression a man could hope to see at dawn. "a kiss would be a good start."

"easy," he grins. he leans in to close the distance between you but stops just in front of your lips. he doesn't close his eyes, choosing to take a moment and admire you in all your wonder.

as far as pretty things go, sanji's no stranger to appreciating beautiful people. yet, there's something about you that is deeper and truer than any attraction he's ever felt before.

it fills him with an inexplicable joy when you're around, and just when he thinks that his heart couldn't be any fuller, you smile at him and his heart grows and grows still. the way he feels about you is bottomless, boundless, limitless, and he's certain that this must be what love feels like.

he figures he's waited long enough to fall in love, and you've definitely waited long enough to be kissed. sanji's lips meet yours, spreading warmth all the way down to his toes, the sweetest taste on his tongue.

he pulls away with a heartstruck look that reflects your own.

sanji rubs a thumb against your cheek, "you're perfect."

you beam at him.

"but your breath stinks," he teases.

you clamp your hands over your lips, a wondrous picture of delightful embarrassment. he laughs at your cute little pout, thanking the heavens for allowing him to keep this angel to himself.

you try to pull away, but he traps you in his arms, and leans in for another kiss (despite the supposed stinky breath). you give in, kissing him again and again and again.

"well," you say when you finally break away. "if you can't join me in bed then i guess i'm joining you in the kitchen. just let me brush my teeth and become a decent human being first."

"sure, sweetheart."

sanji's heart flutters and love overflows into his veins as he watches you skip across the kitchen. you stop in the doorway, looking back over your shoulder.

"oh, sanji?"

"hm?"

"good morning," you hum.

almost like a gift from above, sunlight spills through the windows, bathing two lovers in a quiet kitchen, and sanji knows that this is all he needs.

"good morning, my love."

[forgivemeforgetmenot]

Unwritten

(Cloud x Aerith Fanfic)

Cloud awakened to a world tinted blue. It was early enough to slink back to camp before the others noticed his and Aerith's absence. Realizing he was holding her, he jolted his bare arm upward like a fire had seared his skin. The spasm must've stirred her awake; she sat up and stretched, her extended yawn shattering the lulling silence of the dawn.

"Mm…I slept great! How about you, Cloud?" She smiled down at him, prompting him to shift his eyes away. 

"We should head back to camp," he deflected dryly.

Aerith giggled, "Hope I didn't get any drool on you. You're super comfy…soft, actually. Like a cloud!"

He snorted, rising to his feet, before starting the hike back. "Heyy! Wait for me!" She called after him. 

Much to his dismay, the two returned to find Barret, Tifa, and Red already having breakfast. "Ohh," shouted Barret first, "Nice of y'all to join us! Bet ya worked up an appetite."

Red chuckled, "Hopefully, not too much of one. It's cup noodles. Again."

"Yum, anything sounds great right about now; I'm starving," replied Aerith, seemingly unphased by the blatant taunting. 

Cloud, on the other hand, felt his face turning rosy. There wasn't anything to be embarrassed about. Why did he suddenly feel so… self-conscious? 

Aerith sat beside Red and began slurping up her noodles. Wanting to put as much distance as possible between himself and her, Cloud chose a spot between Tifa and Barret. Tifa handed him his breakfast, which he took sheepishly, avoiding everyone's faces as he ate. "Alright, we got a long day before gettin' back to Sector 5. Hope you two didn't stay up too late," Barret chuckled while extinguishing the fire.

Cloud sighed, feeling pressured to explain their disappearance, but Aerith spoke up before he could formulate a reason. "I wanted to get a better view of the stars," she started, "y'know, away from the trees. Cloud caught me trying to sneak off, and like the dutiful bodyguard he is, he joined me to keep me safe from all the big bad monsters. Isn't that right, Cloud?"

Cloud fumbled over his words, caught off guard by Aerith's lie, "Mm."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever y'all say," Barret winked just before putting his shades on. 

Red smirked, "I think if the interrogation is finished, we best be on our way. This is the first lead on Sephiroth we've encountered in quite some time—if he is lurking around the slums, we don't want to miss him."

Tifa spoke up, "True, but…why would he be hanging around Sector 5? It could just be another dead end; I mean, it doesn't really make sense, does it?" 

"No, but it's all we have to go on as of right now," remarked Cloud, "we don't know what his endgame is or what exactly he needs to do to execute it."

"Feels like we're on a wild Chocobo chase…" Barret muttered. "At least I'll get to spend some time with my baby girl."

Tifa glowed, "That's right. And I can get a nice, hot shower in."

Aerith smiled, clasping her hands, "Okay then, let's get going!"

The group traveled well into the afternoon, exterminating dozens of Hedgehog Pies and Wererats. Barret led the lineup while Aerith, Red XIII, and Tifa chatted together. Cloud lingered a couple feet behind. 

During the day's travels, he noticed Tifa eyeing him periodically. He caught her staring again before she slowed her pace to match his. 

They walked silently beside each other for a brief period. "What's up," he eventually posed, sensing something plagued her. 

She hesitated. "...You know you can talk to me, right Cloud?"

Tifa gazed at him, sincerity softening her face. 

"What do you mean?" he asked, face forward. 

"You can talk to me about anything. I…just want you to know that."

Cloud eyed her curiously, "Same goes for you."

She blushed, looking downward. "Right."

"Is there… something you want to talk about?"

Tifa opened her mouth to answer, but before she could say anything, Barret cursed from up ahead. "Goddammit, don't these motherfuckers have anything better to do!"

A pack of snarling Wrath Hounds blocked their path. Instinctively, Cloud unsheathed the Buster Sword and rushed past Aerith, Red, and Barret. He slashed through a duo, Barret fired a barrage of bullets into one, and Red went toe-to-toe with another. Tifa blocked a bite, eager to sink its fangs into Cloud's shoulder. From afar, Aerith cast a flurry of ice spells, causing multiple hounds to stagger, which gave the rest of the party a collective opening to wipe them out. 

As Cloud sliced through what he thought was the last of them, a bloodcurdling scream seized his heart. He whipped his head around to discover a straggler clamped down on Aerith. Cloud lunged for the monster, ripping it off of her. Then Red pounced, sinking his teeth into the rabid beast's throat to finish it off. 

"Is she alright?!" Barret asked as he and Tifa sprinted over to join them. Cloud clutched Aerith tightly in his arms, studying her unconscious face.

"Oh God, Aerith," Tifa cried. 

"Check her pulse," Red urgently advised. 

Cloud did so. "She's breathing." Everyone shared a sigh of relief. 

"Cloud…" Aerith slowly opened her eyes, "You're kind of…hurting me."

He instantly loosened his grip, "Sorry."

She laughed weakly, "Aw. Were you worried about me?"

"We all were," Tifa smiled.

"Not me," Barret professed, "Girl's a badass. Ain't no dumb dog gonna take her out. I knew you'd be fine." Aerith giggled.

"Are you in any pain?" Red asked. 

"Somewhat," she answered truthfully.

"Can you walk?"

"I think so."

Cloud helped Aerith to her feet, his hand lingering beneath her elbow in case she couldn't. "You worry too much," she assured him, "I'm fine!"

She winced, stepping away from Cloud. Tifa swooped in to steady her, "I think we better set up camp for the night; you need to rest, Aerith." 

"I agree," added Red. 

"There's an inn just down the road, as a matter of fact," Barret suggested, "if Aerith can make it."

"Of course I can!" Aerith limped forward, grimacing in pain. 

Tifa wrapped an arm around her waist, "Let me help."

"We'll want to get there before it gets dark," Cloud interjected, approaching the two girls. Before Aerith could protest, Cloud swept her off her feet.

"Cloud!" She yelped in surprise.

"It'll be quicker this way," he decided, already pushing forward. 

The group soon made their way to the Quartz Inn, where they paid for two rooms—one for the guys and one for the girls. Cloud, Barret, and Red settled into their respective suite. Barret exhaled, flopping on one of the beds, while Red XIII curled beside the crackling fireplace; Cloud sat at the edge of the other bed. "Man, it does feel damn good to lay in a bed," Barret sighed.

"Speak for yourself," Red muttered.

"You can have this one," Cloud offered, "I'm going to check on Aerith and Tifa."

Barret chuckled, "When did you get so considerate, soldier boy?" 

"Cloud's quite the gentleman," Red commented, "especially regarding the girls." Uncomfortable with being the topic of conversation, Cloud grumbled and departed from his two taunting friends. 

He crossed the hall and knocked on the girls' door. Tifa answered, her face brightening at the sight of his. "Hey, everything okay?"

"Yeah. Just wanted to check on the both of you." 

The sweet smile slipped away, and her eyes dropped, "You mean Aerith."

Something about her tone felt less like an assumption and more like an accusation. There was truth in what Tifa said; Aerith had been wounded earlier, so naturally, she was more of a concern at the moment. 

Aerith wasn't feeble by any sense of the word, but there was always something more delicate about the flower merchant, something that ignited a passion to protect. His determination to do so only intensified after his vision—the one he'd been having nightmares about for months. On the other hand, Tifa was a powerhouse—he knew she could take care of herself. "I wanted to finish our conversation, too," Cloud added.

Tifa lighted up some, "Aerith took a nice shower, I helped tend to her scrapes, and now she's resting. I'm sure she'll feel a lot better after a good night's sleep." Relief washed over Cloud, easing the tension in his muscles. 

"Can I meet you outside, in front of the entrance? There's a patio where we can sit and talk. But I'm dying for a shower first," she laughed.

Cloud nodded, "See you in a bit."

20 minutes later, Tifa appeared. She greeted Cloud with a warm smile, sitting in the patio chair next to his. "Better?" he asked.

"Much."

Cloud waited for her to talk, but when she didn't, he began, "So, what is it?"

"Hm?"

"What you wanted to say earlier before the Wrath Hounds showed up."

"Oh," Tifa paused, "Well…"

"Tifa," Cloud groaned impatiently.

"Sorry...I just feel like it's not my place to ask."

"Ask what?" 

"How do you...feel about Aerith?"

"What?" he questioned, puzzled.

"Do you...have feelings for her?"

Cloud looked away. Why was she asking this all of a sudden? "What's it matter?"

Tifa's ruby-colored eyes glistened, "I guess it doesn't."

He shifted in his chair uncomfortably, "Do you not like her?" 

"What? No, no! I love Aerith," Tifa exclaimed. "She's become one of my closest friends."

"She's...my friend too," Cloud struggled to spit out.

"But...do you wish she was more than that?" Tifa pressed.

Agitation furrowed his brow, "That crap isn't for me."

"Right…" her voice cracked. 

Cloud examined her; Tifa's head was angled away from him. She slouched in her seat, wrapping her arms around herself. "You okay?" he asked, concerned by her body language and bizarre questions.

"Y-yeah," she sniveled, wiping at her face, "I think I better sleep." She started speed walking to the inn.

"Tifa," he called after her, but she didn't stop.

Cloud sighed, rolling his head back to take in the starry sky. What had he done wrong? Was it something he said? Should he follow her? Maybe she needed space. Space. 

He gazed up at it until his eyelids grew heavy.

The water was cold. He was cold. 

She was cold. 

Wake up, he tried to say. Wake up, wake up, wake up. But no sound bubbled from his throat. He shook her gently.

Wake up, wake up, wake up.

"Wake up. Cloud, wake up."

He obeyed and locked eyes with Aerith; her face seemed troubled. "Were you having another nightmare?"

Cloud sat up; she took her hand off his shoulder.

"Alright, alright, I get it. You don't want to talk about it."

He changed the subject, "What are you doing out here?" 

She beamed, raising her eyes toward the sky, "I wanted to see the stars again."

"You're supposed to be resting," he rebuked.

"It's not like I've been doing squats."

"Aerith."

"You're not my mommy. And what about you, mister? Why are you out here?" Cloud fell silent, recalling his earlier conversation with Tifa.

"Is...Tifa okay?" he asked.

"She was before I fell asleep earlier. I only woke up a little while ago, and when I did, she was resting. Did something happen?" Aerith asked, concern saturating her voice. 

"No," Cloud answered quickly. "I was just curious."

Aerith leaned in; Cloud's pulse quickened. "You're lying to me," she deduced.

He grunted, locking eyes with her, "Nothing happened."

"Cloud!"

He caved under the pressure of her emerald-colored daggers. "I don't know. I think I upset her or something."

"What did you do?"

"I told you, I don't know."

"You know more than you're telling me."

Cloud clenched his jaw, refusing to speak anymore on the matter. Aerith sighed, refocusing on the sky. Learn to talk to her, he had advised the flowers in her garden back when they first met. What a hypocrite. 

Cloud admired how the starlight from above twinkled in her eyes. 

"I've been having nightmares about Sephiroth," he whispered begrudgingly. Aerith faced him and offered a small smile. She slid her dainty hand into his.

"Whatever the future holds, we'll get through it together."

Her touch soothed him; the idea of defeating Sephiroth once and for all seemed utterly believable at this moment. But the sense of comfort was swiftly plowed aside by the recollection of the other nightmare plaguing him—the gruesome vision of Aerith's murder. He pulled his hand away from hers. "I've been having ones about you, too."

"They're just bad dreams, but they aren't real. And they're not premonitions," Aerith reassured.

"This one was, at one point."

She shook her head, "Not anymore."

He stayed silent, absorbing her words. "Is that why you've been acting so weird with me?" she questioned.

He gave her a slight nod. "Oh, Cloud," she sighed, resting her head on his shoulder. 

"What?"

"You should talk more. I like listening to you."

His hands felt hot; he considered slipping his gloves off. "I talk when it's necessary." 

"Actually, you don't," she argued, "you spent months bottling that up. You shouldn't live life like that."

"I talked. Big whoop. Nothing's changed."

"That's not true either," she contested, lifting her head to gaze into his eyes. 

He stared back, briefly glancing at her mouth as she spoke. 

"I feel closer to you." 

--------------------------------------------------------------

Chapter 2 repost with revisions!

[quartzhearted]

an exploratory kiss, testing the waters between them.

[ AU?? not AU??? who knows ]

ha-HA! i MEANT to wait on this one because my mind's eye knew we would c*i am beaten repeatedly with a squeaky hammer*

[ AU: emblem!lambert ]

morion had always been a staunch believer in his own strength. emblems are a sacred item not just in brodia but throughout elyos's entirety, this he knows; despite that, he assumed that, for him specifically, donning an emblem ring would be the same as giving a dragon a giant flaming meteor tome or something. it's wholly unnecessary!

...such was his thought process before he'd met the one inside the forgotten ring, of course.

lambert, he'd said his name was---the king of a cold kingdom, long since past his rule as he was at that time. he'd known of the continent of fodlan, implying a tie to the emblem of the academy, but the two's timelines had never crossed.

it was interesting to learn about him and the kingdom of faerghus from which he hailed. showing him around brodia had taught morion that the similarities were vast, which made an easy segue into a deeper connection forged by weapon fascination, mineralogy, and the fur market. he was taught how to handle snowstorms better, how to use blizzards to one's advantage, and how not to rig a plumbing system ( the lattermost point having morion howl with laughter so hard that saphir had smacked him for waking her ). dragons, lambert was funny.

and he was a beast, battle-wise. where morion wielded the axe and the sword, lambert completed the circle with his lance. the two together were indestructible; any man who dared to draw close was shredded by the weapon superiority of a king and his emblem.

...yes, his emblem. morion did like the sound of that. but did lambert appreciate having claim laid to him without his knowledge?

one evening, when the battles had subsided and the castle interior was aglow only with the light of candles, morion calls to the small ring on his right index finger.

" ...lambert? can i talk to ya? "

blue flames erupt from the gem set in the middle, but morion does not flinch; he knows these embers will never burn him nor even run hot. the light blossoms into a figure with sturdy armor that rivals the king's own, and a deep blue cape unfurls from behind a collar of fur. golden hair suspends in the air as though underwater, and it is finally then that the fire reveals a chisel-cut face with war-scarred yet gentle eyes.

lambert, emblem of the holy lion king ( as dubbed by morion ), floats at attention. it makes morion hesitant.

" hey there, " morion starts, though his voice quickly dies as he reconsiders what he's trying to say. is now the time for casualties? perhaps not. " er...

" look, lambert, i've been thinkin'. " hand draws behind neck as he looks off, somewhat bashfully. " y'know, before i'd met you, i was all against usin' emblems for myself. i thought that my strength would carry me as far as i needed, and an emblem would just be overkill.

" but after havin' you around, helping me in all those battles... i figured somethin' out. " his eyes flick back to lambert's, trying to ignore the burning focus in those ethereal blue irises. " it's not just about the power. it's about the person, too. and i've... i've gotten... attached, i guess you could say. "

he isn't sure if lambert even cares. or does he? it's never easy to read people, but emblems even less so; they've lived lives far longer than morion could ever dream of. what has lambert seen, and how does he feel under morion's command? does he respect him? does he care for him the way morion does for lambert? does he, does he, does he...

but morion's thoughts are interrupted when lambert pulls nearer. there's a glow on his face that morion thinks isn't just because of the emblem flame, and as hands smooth over his shoulders and playfully grip his chin...

...morion's much more than fairly sure he understands.

" i... hope i'm not imposin', " morion says next, voice lowered to just above a whisper, " but if it's alright with ya...

" ...i'd really like to kiss ya. "

morion feels as though it shouldn't be possible to kiss an emblem, but if the very real feeling of lambert's gauntlets on his skin is anything to go by, he probably doesn't know as much as he thinks he does about emblems. lambert inches close and so does he; their lips meet, and morion immediately feels as though he's in a dream.

blue tinders swirl through his vision and yet lambert is always perfectly clear. he feels whiskers tickle the bottom of his lip and, when lambert tilts his head, morion decides he'll just roll with whatever comes next. eyes close and emblem-bearing hand brushes against lambert's cheek,

and emblem and wielder...

...well, let us just say they achieve A+ rank, shall we?

[ninjastudioart]

Feral Lloyd Nonsense

•Lloyd crawling on all fours like an animal as if its normal terrified the ninja at first but eventually they just accepted it.

•Cole nearly died one night when he saw Lloyd just sitting on a counter like a gremlin with his giant glowing eyes staring dead at him.

•Lloyd makes a variety of weird sounds, especially when he's angry. When angry or threatened he's known to cat-growl, cat-hiss, raptor-hiss, snake-hiss, yowl, raptor-screech, cougar-scream, deer-bleat, deer-snort, bull-grunt, spider-hiss, goat bleat, raven-croak, and raven-scream. Just a sample for ya :)

•Sometimes when he laughs he squawks like a bird. He also snorts and he doesn't find either very amusing

•Lloyd purrs when he's happy or content, but he'll occasionally purr as a self-soothing mechanism. The sure way to hear him purr is giving him headpets. He hates being made to purr, but can't deny the head pets >:)

•Lloyd tends to shake himself dry, and it works despite his thick hair, well, most of the time

•Lloyd will chase lasers and you better believe the ninja abuse this

•Lloyd curls up into a ball, or crescent, to sleep if he's not comfortable or is wary (basically all the time) However if he does feel safe, he sleeps on his back, legs and arms in the air, tongue hanging out, drooling, limbs twitching, hair amess. The ninja refer to this as the "dead opposum"

•Lloyd hates people touching him without consent, but he'll crawl all over you. He's a cat bastard

•Sleeps with pillows in a nest formation

•Shreds cheap plushies apart for fun by holding them in his mouth and flinging his head around

•If you as a criminal run, he will chase. Don't activate his predatory instincts!

•Lloyd will lick and chew on people, especially their fingers and arms. The ninja stopped asking

•Y'know how cats yawn? That's Lloyd. He yawns by just stretching his cheeks to the breaking point. It may be funny, but it also shows off his awfully sharp teeth so-

•He scratches at things to keep his claws/talons nice and sharp

•Lloyd shows affection by rubbing his head on people, head butting, pressing noses together, sleeping on top of you and licking/biting

•Goes absolutely berserker at times and just becomes a savage animal

•Pupils do the cat thing and get big when aggressive or scared

•He will enter any box that seems big enough, and this contortionist may as well fit in every box

•Ninja went fishing once and watched him catch a fish with his mouth. Shocked doesn't describe how they felt

•Ears move around to show he's listening to something and to convey emotion

•Chews on shit like a puppy

•Makes biscuits in blankets and on frens (can be painful)

•He has toe beans. The ninja try to touch and Nya almost lost a finger when he snapped at her

•Endless teeth

•He's an ovo-vegetarian but sometimes instincts do what they do. Has caught mice and eaten them

•Likes to pounce from the shadows

•Actual gremlin

•His purrs are cat-like, but he's occasionally "purred" like a spider

•Hair gets boofier and messier when he's irritated

•He will bare his teeth and it is intimidating since his mouth is abnormally large and his jaws are long

•Sniffs people when they offer his head pets and such

•Will bite if you irritate him. Will scratch too. No shame

•Has ripped peoples throats out before. Don't fuck with his loved ones

•Licks his wounds without even realizing

•Fun cat stretches when he first gets up

•If he fits he sits which is problematic cause he's claustrophobic

•Ninja saw him bite at his arm when he had an itch and just stood in shock as he chewed through his skin on accident. The itch did leave tho-

•Not really a feral trait but Lloyd's hair is so thick you can't see his scalp unless you shave it. I count it on grounds of it coming from his dragon blood so shut-

•The first time Zane watched Lloyd scratch his head with his leg he thought a robot-dog had somehow disguised itself. Lloyd was not happy about being tackled

•Lays in the sun and lazies about when he won't hate himself for it

•Hates the cold and uses others as a heating pad. Kai is his favorite person ever for this

The ninja love their feral bastard tho, even tho he is an absolute rat child

[acaplaya-musings]

Voiceplay Visuals - In The Hall Of The Mountain King

Hey, it's a Voiceplay Visuals post for a video which I originally skipped over! So yeah, it's been a hot while since we've had a new full-length VoicePlay video, and it's been even longer since there's been a video worthy of a Voiceplay Visuals post, so I was like "y'know what, I might as well swallow my inhibitions and go watch In The Hall Of The Mountain King." Because if you didn't already know, I had never actually watched that one! I kinda just glanced at the thumbnail and went "hmm maybe not", but eh, what can I say, it's still Voiceplay content, and I knew from what I had heard about it that this one is/would be deserving of a visual analysis, so here we are!

Anyway, In The Hall Of The Mountain King was released on the 17th of September, 2022, and features Elizabeth Garozzo, who has provided background vocals for the Frozen 2 Medley and the Greatest Showman Medley, and she also featured in Just Sing I believe? Layne did the arrangement for this one (other than one small section which was arranged by Geoff), and he was also in charge of the video. Note: this is gonna be a rare instance of me breaking my informal personal rule of "only talk about what's on screen, don't talk about vocals", because the visuals and audio are so closely linked together in this one that it simply must be acknowledged! However, I'll keep it simple, and still only talk about stuff that's directly relevant to what's happening onscreen. But enough rambling, let's get into this!

Barely a few frames into the video and already you know this is gonna be one of those videos. The kind where the moniker "theatre kids of acapella" is practically an understatement! 😂

(Also peep the Shock mask from Nightmare Before Christmas on the far left of frame!)

I'm not giving everyone individual screencaps to talk about their appearances, because there's a lot to talk about in this video and I'm not sure whether I'll be at risk of hitting image limit or not. But of course I have notes!

Kudos to Rick Underwood as always, plus Renette Feren, for the makeup and prosthetics! Joint credits are given to Pattycake Productions and "Penguin Point Productions" for the costuming. Also check out what Eli's wearing! Does that patterned cuff/sleeve look familiar? That coat also got used in My Mother Told Me, and then later on in Valhalla Calling!

Geoff is teal/blue (again), Eli is green, Elizabeth is pink/purple, Cesar is red, and Layne is orange. I know I'm just stating the obvious, but keep note of it anyway!

(Oh yeah and look at the Lock mask in the background between Geoff and Eli!)

Eli: "Hey how about I add this to the cauldron?" (I believe that's a carrot? Or meant to be anyway)

Elizabeth: "How about you don't?"

1, Elizabeth is very pretty in this, and 2, when she starts singing and adds some magic sparkly stuff to the cauldron, the cauldron starts glowing purple!

Has that fur cape/cloak been used in a different video? Idk

So yeah, all the guys are wearing contacts to match their skin colours (idk if Elizabeth is). Coloured contacts are a pain in the backside to apply apparently, or for Geoff and Eli they are anyway

Ngl I think Geoff's character in this is growing on me, but I do still largely prefer Geoff as his normal self of course <3 (with like two exceptions)

Also he throws something into the cauldron and I have no clue what it is/what it's supposed to be, just that it's small and round! But after he does so (while still taking lead vocals), the cauldron starts glowing blue! Noticing a pattern yet?

I think Cesar really wants to add that bottle(?) of whatever that is to the potion/mixture! 😄

(And man that is one heck of a cool ear design!)

Layne, however, is less keen on the idea 😂

(And you can just see the Barrel mask behind his shoulder on the right here! Idk what the original intention was, but the masks are fun little easter eggs!)

*Pfft*

Geoff: "uh you good there?"

Eli takes a sip of the potion...

...And then starts singing operatically!

Yeah so two of recurring audio-visual connections in this video (or however you wanna phrase it) is that 1, the cauldron glows the colour of whoever has just added something to the potion (usually while vocalising), and 2, taking a sip from the potion makes you sing opera-style, at least until weird stuff starts getting added to it, lol

I still don't understand the why/how of this bit, but sure let's just go with it I guess 😂😅

(Also when Eli chucks Mini Eli into the cauldron (rip), the cauldron then glows green!)

Cesar: "Hey Layne what's that over there?"

Layne: "What? Where?"

And so while Layne's distracted, Cesar sneaks an extra little something-something into the potion! (I don't know if the spider label has any real meaning to it)

Geoff how dare you be cute in this video of all things! /lh 😂

Cesar gives Layne a taste of the potion...

...And it apparently made him drunk! XD

Cesar thinks it's hilarious, Eli is Concerned(tm)

Also, a fun fact that I learned from one of the comments: Apparently when Layne starts "drunk singing" here, the music switches from minor key to major key! (I don't know how to tell the difference so I'm just taking their word for it). And then after Cesar slaps him out of his drunken state (lol), the music switches back to minor key!

Eli I know you like spicy food but this is ridiculous 😆

Yep, the potion is now definitely much spicier! 😝

(And also, now the music is sppeding up! It's linked!)

This was a very cool switch-up in the music, and I like how they depicted it in the video!

What a queen, I love her (Also that is some really good airbrushing work!)

Geoff coming in with an extra bonus ingredient! (And even here his hair still looks really nice goddammit)

Also this isn't directly linked to the visuals, but this little "swing" section (that has been compared to the OG Inspector Gadget theme tune) is the bit that Geoff came up with/suggested for the piece!

Surprise carrot incoming

Mr Carrot Lord Layne is quite pleased with himself it seems!

Until he realized what he did would affect him too, that is! Lol rip

So yeah, that's In The Hall Of The Mountain King! Wild video, even wilder arrangement (like seriously, this is a piece of classical music! No lyrics! To do it all acapella and still make it creative and interesting and enjoyable is insane!). Idk when or what the next VoicePlay video will be, but hopefully it'll give me plenty to talk about! Bye for now!

[squarebracketsmileyface]

vaguely points towards the direction of fourth of july by fall out boy. i was talking to my friends ab it being a brian&tim song but honestly? its soo "sorry its licked" jaylex sometimes. "you are my favourite what if, you are my best ill never know." / "oh im sorry, i didnt mean any of it, i just got too lonely, in between being young and being right you were my versailles at night" / "i said id never miss you but i guess you never know" its them.

- lynxb3 (hii!)

Hi Lynxb3 :D (Lynx?) no no, you were right, I'm changing the name to "Sorry, It's Licked" forthwith and rewriting the entire story so that Jay licked Alex's keys so that they belonged to him, as per the ancient laws of the universe

Also you're SO right with that song, there are so many lyrics that work so well for Jay and Alex, and honestly just the comparison to fireworks all the way through the song works for them as well. because like, when done properly fireworks can be fun and beautiful, but if you fuck up even a little bit when you're setting them up they can shoot off in the wrong direction or too early or too late and really badly hurt people. Like, yes, they can be beautiful, but you can also get severe burns from them and stuff like that. Which, yeah that's Jaylex in S,IL alright lol.

Anyway, looking at specific lyrics under the thingy bob cos it got long:

"I said I'd never miss you, but I guess you never know, May the bridges I have burned, Light my way back home on the fourth of July" is one of the lyrics that really feels like Jay and Alex to me, like, specifically the idea that after everything got SUPER fucked up in uni and they finally parted ways, neither of them realised just how much they'd miss each other? Like, i think especially Alex wouldn't have realised it, because he's gonna break it off fairly impulsively (it's still a good decision, but it's a fairly split second one all the same) right after Jay really badly hurts him, so obviously he wouldn't think he'd miss Jay, because the last time he saw him was a time when Jay did something that really fucked him up, y'know?

and then like, the bridge between them is burned, duh, but they still find their ways back to each other years later during the events of MH. And that bridge is still burned, but instead of being a blazing inferno it's just glowing coals. Which obviously isn't gonna be fun to walk across, you'll burn your feet and there's the constant threat that a board will give way and send you plummeting into the water rushing below. And, yeah, that does happen, they both get burned then Alex purposefully shoves Jay off the bridge and sets it back on fire because that's the only thing he can think to do to stop Jay following him back across it, which would get Jay killed.

"You are my favorite what if, You are my best I'll never know" Jay and Alex both definitely had at least a phase of thinking about what they could have been if the other person hadn't fucked it up. or, well Jay would have thought about what they could have been if Alex hadn't fucked it up. Alex would have thought about what they could have been if both of them hadn't fucked it up.

Alex isn't unaware that his own actions and behaviors had a hand in their relationship failing/not going further than FWB's, but he doesn't think he's solely to blame. I think for a long time he did just purely blame himself, mostly because Jay verbally/outwardly blamed him too, like, just straight to his face made him feel like it was his fault. But (especially after he got together with Amy) he'd eventually come to realise Jay was at fault too, that they both fucked it up and chances were that they could never have worked out while they were both still 'themselves'. They'd have to have been so different than they were for their uni relationship to have worked out/been healthy.

"And I'm starting to forget, Just what summer ever meant to you, What did it ever mean to you?" Honestly, I can't decide which of them would have been more upset to find themselves forgetting things about the other, like, after a year or two of just not talking to each other or seeing each other at all after Uni.

Maybe Jay would be the most upset if he did forget anything, but I don't think he would forget that much? If that makes sense? Like, I think that relationship in uni had such an impact on him that he wouldn't forget nearly anything about it, and i think that he'd honestly hate that because he'd be so angry at Alex for how it ended (i have evil plans to give them a terrible 'break up' lmao, they do about it so fucking badly) like, I think Jay remembered Alex's birthday more easily than he remembers anyone elses, even the people he actually cared about actively, I think he would still remember Alex's favourite meal and his favourite songs, I think he'd remember the bands Alex told him he used to listen to before he met Jay, all the random ass shit. and he would hate it.

he'd hate that he remembers more about Alex than he does about his current partner or his current friends or anyone else. (no I'm not projecting. No i don't hate that I struggle to remember my best friends' birthdays but I remember a certain not-technically-my-ex's birthday without even having to think about it, because I got hyperfixated on him and my brain decided to keep weird random facts about him, what are you talking about?)

On the other hand, I think Alex would forget a lot about Jay, whether that's because of Operator mind fuckery or just as a natural thing he would have forgotten no matter what, and I think he'd hate it. I think he'd hate realising he forgot something about Jay, especially as he slowly came to terms with his sexuality and realised that he had in fact really liked Jay and just hadn't known how to deal with it, so had just shoved it down and vehemently ignored it. I think he'd hate it if he realised he could no longer remember Jay's favourite colour, his favourite season, his favourite whatever.

I think it'd make him worry about what else he didn't remember about Jay, it'd make him worry that he was forgetting good things about Jay and making it so that his mind could only paint Jay in a bad light when actually there were things he'd forgotten that would place him in a getter one.

"Oh, I'm sorry I didn't mean any of it, I just got too lonely, lonely, whoa" God, Jay and Alex say so many nasty things to each other that they don't mean in S,IL (like, over the whole series not just in the main starting fic) Like, in chapter 2 of S,IL with Alex saying anything and everything horrible that he could think of to scare Jay away and make him hate him so he stopped trying to find out what happened to Alex in uni to make him the way he is now with all the Operator stuff. and then also in chapter 3 of "If It Ain't Broken" Jay remembers a fight he and Alex had, and remembers some of the really nasty shit he said to Alex during that (and probably forgets a whole bunch of it too, because he struggles to remember stuff that happens when he's like REALLY angry, everything just kinda greys out and he doesn't remember anything much about what happened)

god they're both so horrible to each other sometimes 💀

I am a cruel god forcing their hands.

They could have been happy but I'm just here like "dance for me my pets, dance for me and perhaps I'll reward you with some sliver of fluff for you to wrap your wounds with."

And then I give their promised fluff to someone else 💀

"Don't tell me you cried, Oh, honey, you don't have to lie" (i thought this line was 'don't tell me you're fine, oh honey you don't have to lie' literally until just now when I finally looked up the lyrics for this post, so well done me) Honestly though, I think if Alex told Jay he'd been upset about ending their FWB relationship in uni Jay wouldn't have believed him. Like, if Alex had told Jay he'd cried over it, that he'd had to ask Amy to reassure him that it was the right decision and it didn't make him a bad person for ending it, Jay would think he was bullshitting him. He'd think Alex was just saying it to stop him from hating him for it, or to make him feel sorry for him.

"I wish I'd known how much you loved me, I wish I cared enough to know" Alex alex alex alex alex

alex

Specifically alex after uni realising he liked Jay back and wishing he knew how much Jay actually liked him. Like, he knew Jay liked him, obviously, but he didn't know the extent to which he did, he always shut the conversation down the second it strayed too close to real talk about real feelings, and now he's regretting that. he wished he knew, he wishes he'd cared enough to ask about it. He wished he'd consciously cared enough about Jay to get over his fear of being in love with another guy, but that wasn't how it turned out and now he's left thinking back on what they had and picking through every little thing he remembered Jay doing and saying, trying to find something to tell him exactly how much Jay liked him.

did Jay just like him casually? did Jay love him? did jay like to think they could have ended up being partners for life if Alex had just gotten over himself? or was the furthest he saw them theoretically getting just a short-ish relationship once they got out of uni, before they eventually parted ways, or maybe remained friends after that?

Alex would feel bad about not having cared enough about Jay to get over caring about himself and his fear of himself and how people percieved him. Even though he'd know that his fear of people thinking/finding out that he was queer in some way was a very valid fear to have. Y'know?

"I'm sorry every song's about you, The torture of small talk with someone you used to love" honestly this one is just the awkwardness of Alex seeing Jay again for the first time since he gave him the tapes after Uni. Like, Alex has done all sorts of introspection and come to terms with his identity and has realised he did like Jay back back in uni and just hadn't known how to deal with that. And now he's lost Amy, and he's face to face with someone he's realised he actually used to really like, and oh god maybe he still likes him, and he just doesn't know what to say, he doesn't know how to talk to him, he doesn't know how to make it so this isn't awkward.