#tumblr can feel my wrath

[deviltownresident]

I don’t know you but tell me more

ohohohohoho you have no idea how long i have wanted to rant about duolingo. where to start... probably texts i once sent about it to @the-lemonisinplay

"my dad knows duolingo doesn't help but he still uses it, he's obsessed with the leagues, my mother doesn't care but she thinks it helps her skills, it does not. i want to start a chatroom of people who hate duolingo bc I can't be the only one. you know what I hate? duolingo. more specifically, other people doing duolingo. and practically shouting into their phones in a language I don't understand. and the phrase 'I have to do duolingo'. no. it's not true, you don't have to do it. you picked it up for fun and now you're getting brainwashed into doing useless activities each day instead of what? instead of people actually enjoying being in your presence. get a life. every single day. do you want to do X thing? no. you have a fucking fictional owl cartoon to spend time with. you know what else you have to spend time with? other people. my dad does duolingo twice a day, sessions of about 20 minutes? they're trying to learn Dutch atm, and it's not even helping. they're not learning anything new. they're just obsessed with staying in the right league. but the thing is they know duolingo isn't helpful and they hate it most of the time but they're still obsessed. let the world feel my wrath at the scary owl app."

i think that pretty much sums it up. i know a lot of that is about my parents but i feel like this must have happened to lots of people- it's a real problem how companies try to sell their product by giving people a false sense of accomplishment by endorsing it. and yeah, maybe i have a vendetta specifically against this stupid app, but i'm not the only one who critiques its ability to actually teach languages - anyone who's been on it for more than five minutes will know that most of the vocabulary it teaches you is bogus - ie, sentences like one my mum had, "my snail can't eat salt" - and that it's completely ineffective for teaching grammatical rules. you need a proper teacher, or at least a human fucking being to teach you that, not a corporation out there purely to scam you for your time (don't get me started on duolingo plus)

anyway. sorry this is literal months late it's been in my drafts for forever. if you made it this far... well done and i'm slightly in love with you.

[nerdy-talks]

Warning : This post is going to be a very personal rage dump/rant.

There are heavy topics involved, including cancer and death. Also explicit language.

Out of consideration and respect to those of you who would prefer not to read it (since I completely understand why you wouldn’t want to), I will continue under the cut

Also pictures of my dogs, to break up the doom and gloom ^^"

-------------------------

I absolutely despise, loathe, hate toxic people.

Especially when those toxic people are the “wolf in sheep’s clothing” type.

Especially when those people don’t have the fucking balls to confront others directly and just choose to slink about behind the scenes like scummy little vermin.

So… my uncle Joe passed away a few days ago.

It was expected. He had been battling pancreatic cancer, which ended up spreading into his liver and lungs.

With that being said, even though he will be dearly missed, at least he no longer has to suffer.

I was close with my uncle.

In fact, it’s no exaggeration to say that I was much closer to him than I was with my own father (my Dad was a permanent presence in my life up until the day he died, but we had an extremely tumultuous, dysfunctional, volatile, abusive relationship.)

We visited my uncle Joe regularly ever since I was a baby, all the way up until somewhat recently. He spent countless hours at our place throughout the years. He was super close with my parents, doing tons of outdoorsy activities with them. I spent a good amount of my childhood with his family. When his wife passed away, my parents helped him and supported him. He helped us move twice. My Mom took his kids places when she was just dating my Dad. When my Dad passed away, my uncle Joe was there for me without me even having to ask.

Literally everything was good between us, and always has been.

It’s also thanks to my uncle Joe that we gained a new furry member of our family last year, who we named Dandy 💙 my uncle’s dog had puppies, he asked how many we wanted, so we took one lol

(I’ll include a few poor quality pictures because… well, I should probably break up this message with a little “positivity”, right?)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This was Dandy when he was still just a baby, 4 weeks and 3 days old.

Look at the cute little potato 🥹

We visited my uncle Joe every week to see him grow and develop, anxiously waiting until he was old enough to bring home.

And this was the day he finally joined our family ~

Look at how tiny he was compared to my one Black Lab (sorry for the terrible quality picture. Our carpets are old, but I swear they don't look that dingy ^^")

And here's Dandy today, one year and five months later ~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Anyway! Back to my rage-fueled rant :

My uncle Joe met someone about a year and a half ago, and she moved in with him pretty quickly.

Which certainly wasn't a bad thing. We were genuinely happy for him.

She seemed very nice, sweet, accepting, kind, receptive, and welcoming.

But for whatever reason, the dynamic changed the moment my uncle fell ill and the control landed in her hands.

Since my uncle Joe was sick, we all mutually decided that it would be best if communication was between my Mom/me and her (we would text her to check in to see how he was doing, as well as find out if/when it was a good time for us to visit)

This is where some inconsistencies started to appear.

For example :

She would tell us not to visit because my uncle was too sick (which was totally understandable!), but then would tell us a few days later how he was doing great and had fishing trips planned all week.

I 100% believed her at the time.

After all, everyone has both good and bad days.

But then when we would visit, my uncle Joe told us how he couldn’t fish anymore because the chemo was causing neuropathy in his hands, and he couldn’t hold his fishing pole or cast/reel the line in.

Though we just assumed he discovered those issues after she told us about those supposed fishing trips.

But the true eye-opener happened during our one visit. My uncle Joe welcomed us into his home, we talked, found out some updates about his health (which was declining), etc. He was open/transparent with us about everything.

When my uncle went to the bathroom during that visit, his girlfriend made the comment “I probably should have told you guys not to come here, since he’s in a lot of pain today.”

Knowing my uncle, I didn’t budge from my seat. I knew that if he wasn’t up for company, he wouldn't hesitate to tell us to leave.

And I’m glad we didn’t leave… because literally 10 minutes later, her granddaughter came waltzing in to visit her.

My uncle came out of the bathroom, sat on the sofa doubled over in pain as he was talking to me and my Mom (at this time, we asked him directly if we should leave, since we knew he was dealing with a lot and we didn't want to overstay our welcome. He told us not to leave, that we could stay because he felt like shit regardless).

But as he was sitting there, clearly in pain, his girlfriend and her granddaughter asked him to get up and carve a watermelon for them instead of doing it themselves.

What sense does that make?

'I should have told you guys to stay away, but I’m gonna make him strain himself and carve a watermelon for us even though he’s already suffering and struggling enough'

…. Okay. Fuck you too.

We obviously didn’t say anything. We just visited for a little while longer, then left with a friendly/cordial “goodbye, nice to see you again” to her and her granddaughter, told my uncle that we would be thinking about him and see him again, and wished them a good day.

Two and a half months passed before we heard from them again.

Why? Because she refused to answer our numerous calls and texts.

She deliberately ignored us, which actively prevented us from having an opportunity to see my uncle.

And she knew damn well that we wouldn’t just show up at my uncle’s house unannounced because we didn’t want to disturb him if he wasn’t feeling up for company.

We only got in contact with him again after he directly called our phone and left a message saying “hey, just checking in. I hope you’re both doing okay, since I haven’t heard from either of you in a while. Stop by when you can”.

So we went to his house.

When we explained the situation to my uncle Joe/passive aggressively confronted his girlfriend, her excuse was “oh, sorry. The reception here is bad so my phone was probably just acting up.”

For two and a half months?

Even though she was literally using her phone in front of us, which appeared to be working perfectly fine?

Even though she’s always on her phone every time we see her?

Even though she could have reached out to us, yet chose not to? Not even once in two and a half months??

I call bullshit.

My Mom even told her that she was on the verge of sending a text that said “okay, cunt.” since we thought she was ignoring us after not responding to our multiple texts/calls.

We all laughed it off as a joke, Joe's girlfriend even said “hahaha, I probably would have laughed if I got a text like that!” … but it most certainly was not a joke.

(My Mom is extremely outspoken and normally doesn’t hold back, especially when it counts. She’s the type of person you either love or hate, but she’s definitely one of a kind and the perfect example of a strong, independent woman who gives zero fucks lol)

Anyway, that visit went well. We behaved like usual, talked to both my uncle and his girlfriend normally, caught up on stuff, etc.

After that interaction, his girlfriend miraculously responded to every single call and text (bad reception, huh? Funny how she had zero service issues after we called her out in front of my uncle)

But basically every time we talked with her, she would say “it’s not a good time to come by, he’s really sick.”

And we would always respond with things like “we totally understand”, “thank you so much for letting us know”, “we wish there was something we could do to help”, “we’re here for you if you ever need anything or anyone to talk to since we know this also isn’t easy for you”, “we’ll check in next weekend”, “please take care of yourself”, “we’ll be thinking about you”, etc.

Then finally, my uncle Joe told us to stop up again two weeks ago. So we did.

He was extremely sick and remained in bed, but we said hello and he told us that we are more than welcome there and we could just visit with his girlfriend. So we did. The visit remained cordial and friendly.

The next day, my uncle called and apologized for not getting up when we were there.

We immediately told him that he has absolutely no reason to be sorry, that we completely and wholeheartedly understand, that we would understand even if he told us to leave the moment we arrived, and that we were keeping him in our thoughts.

The week after that, his girlfriend said he was too sick for company (which again, we obviously understood and thanked her for letting us know, wished them the best, etc).

We didn’t visit my uncle Joe after that. He passed away before we had another opportunity to see him.

Now, here’s where my anger starts to come into play :

His girlfriend didn’t let us know when he passed away.

We found out from my other uncle, Mike, two days later. (My Dad had 3 brothers. His eldest brother is my uncle Joe who just passed away. His youngest brother is my uncle Mike who let us know what happened.)

So my Mom called her and offered her condolences, asked how she was doing, told her that we’re here for her, and asked about the arrangements. My Mom also told her that Mike was the one who let us know about Joe.

She made the comment “there’s going to be a small ceremony, but only for immediate family.”

Which didn’t make sense to me or my Mom. We were both very close with my uncle Joe, we are family. So that comment seemed a bit… off?

But we dismissed it and instead talked to my uncle Mike.

We asked him to please keep us updated, since we wanted to pay our respects to my uncle Joe and our family.

Well… I don’t know what the Hell that lady said to my cousin (Joe’s son), but he told my uncle Mike not to tell us anything else.

That snake in the grass obviously ran back and told my cousin that we found out about Joe’s passing from Mike.

But uhh... We deserved to know.

Now, we literally just found out this morning that the ceremony was held yesterday. We weren't invited (the day/time wasn't publicly announced).

We were excluded. We were denied the opportunity to say our final goodbye.

I blame his girlfriend. Completely and entirely.

I especially find it super interesting that she didn’t attend the ceremony either… almost like she was afraid that we might possibly show up and confront her (which we would never do, purely out of respect for my uncle Joe)

When my uncle Mike told us, he apologized. But we told him that we don’t blame him, since we certainly didn’t want to put him in the middle of it.

It just pisses me the fuck off.

Bad enough she actively prevented us from seeing my uncle Joe, even on his “good” days. But then to keep us away from the ceremony too?

And she HAD to have fed my cousin a bunch of lies and bullshit to cause him to tell my uncle Mike not to inform us of anything. (Luckily for us, my uncle Mike loves to talk so he didn’t mind spilling the tea. He just felt guilty for not doing so sooner. But I understand why he waited, and I hold zero animosity towards him)

It’s especially confusing and upsetting since we always remained on good terms with all of my cousins.

We saw my cousins regularly, got along well with them, joked around with them.

Literally nothing that we did or didn’t do would warrant such a reaction from them.

If there was any fault on our end, I certainly wouldn’t be angry about this situation or waste my time typing this up. (I'm not the type of person who plays the victim, I admit when I'm wrong and own up to my faults/wrongdoings. That just isn't the case here.)

So it’s seriously a mystery to me… which is why I blame my uncle Joe’s girlfriend.

Absolutely nothing changed in the decades of knowing my uncle and his kids. Literally the only recent change was her coming into the picture.

(I also want blame my cousin, since he’s older than me and has a mind of his own… but I also know that he’s grieving the loss of his father, so I feel like that bitch took advantage of the situation to say whatever she wanted about us while my cousin is vulnerable and not thinking clearly/properly).

Regardless of the finer details…. I am absolutely livid.

It’s like a giant “fuck you” to us, like we aren’t good enough, like our feelings don’t matter.

And that pisses me off beyond belief.

I’m debating whether or not I should confront her.

On one hand, I probably should just let it go and move on.

But on the other hand… I want to play dumb, call her, and be like “How are you doing? Do you know when the ceremony is?“ just to see what she says.

And then tell her to go fuck herself.

Is that immature of me? Sure.

But I’m angry. Annoyed. Irritated. Fuming. My rage is boiling, my wrath is building. And I feel like exploding.

Needless to say… my Mom was right. That lady is a cunt. A toxic, festering, diabolical, oozing, gaping, pungent cunt.

If you’ve read up to this point, I genuinely apologize for dumping all of this off here.

I just needed to vent a bit.

I also owe everyone who has tagged me a HUGE thank you. You have all given me a much needed distraction from everything, plus I genuinely love being tagged.

So I will absolutely start posting/replying to those a little later (I've already started on them and have them saved in my drafts, I just want to finish them all and post everything at once lol)

[instormer]

“go to hell” is basic. “i hope you become obsessed with a character you fully don’t know how to draw” is smart. it’s possible. it’s terrifying.

[snekdood]

i figured out the issue with tumblr and its that it will never be a good art site bc everyones always got some shit to say and everyone always thinks theyre right and thats why no one reblogs shit because “it could be problematic in a way im not detecting and someone will yell at me later for it” type shit. literal cesspool ass website.

[writella]

Reckless Romantics

Synopsis: Can be read as a stand alone or part two to getting ready for me; a return to innocent, inexperienced!reader and her relationship with Rick Grimes; two weeks after their first time together there has been some distance, but now Rick wants to make up for how hasty he was when he touched her last.

Details: Rick Grimes x fem!reader, smut: oral (f receiving) and teaching reader how to give a handjob, unspecified (of age) age gap, sweetness + kissing + a little mutual pining maybe, probably cliche, and leaning more into Rick as the dutiful leader and gentle lover (I feel this is just as in character as dom!Rick). Reader is a music lover— any kind of music you like— but she also likes a specific band only because I watched a documentary about them at the theater in July so it made its way into the story. Slightly proofread— will be corrected more later. wc: 5-7k (I lost track after finishing it on tumblr).

A/N: I wrote this message before I returned for the summer, but I still want you to read it: Been spending time outside this summer, trying to reach some goals— time got away from me. I don’t think I’ll ever stop saying I miss you, but please know it’s always true.

— with love from writella, my beautiful reader. ♡

Rick Grimes was not a man to give in to temptation.

My mercy prevails over my wrath, he’d say— his secret keepsake phrase. The one he whispers to himself in moments of hardship; the one he uses when he needs to make decisions only a leader would. Rick was a man of discipline; honor. He never boasted about how seriously he took these qualities, but when others did— admired, applauded, stuck by him for it— it would be a lie to say that he didn’t take note and use their pride to keep him going. This is how he knows he is strong-willed, why he wouldn’t fall for foolish, forbidden things. He was better than that. The safety and prosperity he brought to Alexandria proved it, reaffirmed it.

So why couldn’t someone remind him of that two weeks ago before he touched you?

As for you, you believed yourself to be a girl who wouldn’t fall so easily for the first man who showed you any kind of affection.

From an adolescence of peers who never seemed to take notice of you to one filled with walkers and adults who were either dead or seldom your age, you learned how hard love, let alone any connection, is to come by. It has made you quite the perpetual daydreamer because of it. One with a heart and mind filled with fantasy worlds, creating what you lacked externally. It often made you see yourself as much younger than you were despite all you’ve been through. No regular person your age in the old world has probably escaped as many deaths and wannabe cowboy dictators as you have. Still, they probably knew what it was like to have a high school romance, or at least go to the movies with friends, and have graduated from well, anything. You were simply born too late and shoved into this new world too early to experience even half of it.

This upbringing has brought you up to believe yourself precocious, although— maybe you were already too old for that word now. No, you were, so maybe– sensible, realistic despite the overactive imagination; you could decipher between right and wrong, real versus fake. This is why, for as long as you could, you did not entertain any thoughts of Rick Grimes.

Other people would though, women mostly. But you did have your suspicions of others who thought the same— they just weren't as shameless. Those who were, could be found during lunch breaks from work on house porches; or laughing and whispering at community gatherings and at the back of town hall meetings. Basically any time or place they could turn into a gossip session, which was often. And it didn’t always have to do with Rick. It could be about any one of the men in town; or retelling funny moments to their friends or complaining about their co-workers. But anything of true, great interest always had to do with the community leaders. You wish you could say you were the exception to this interest, but hypocritically, you loved a good inside scoop, and luckily for you, you had a trustworthy way about you. Almost everyone who spoke to you or allowed you to sit with them and their friends for meals agreed: you were a intent, quiet listener making you the best kind of person to say things to without judgment; and people assumed you as shy, yet you loved to laugh which was great for boosting egos. They often treated you as a little sister in that way, as if the pleasure was all yours to get to hear their ramblings because they were either older or perceived themselves to be more sociable and experienced than you. You tried not to care too much about what they took you for. It was nice to feel trusted, even if people could be a little too mean or weird for your liking because no matter who it was, they made you feel as if you were watching television, and you missed television. They told you things from period mishaps– (it’s the apocalypse, there are a lot of free bleeding queens okay)— to which people in their workstations annoyed them most with very detailed explanations as to why and, of course, rumors or general talk about the leaders: who they thought each of them has slept with, if there seemed to be any fighting between them and what side they were taking, and obviously, anything that had to do with one of the guys. Some were downright obvious that one or the other was their type, while others might try to be more sly about it, always bringing whichever man it was up more than the others. But unless they were diehard Daryl girls, wanted to dominate Glenn, or had some military man, hot priest, or doctor kink for Abraham, Gabriel, or Siddiq, most of them apparently felt that Rick was the love of their lives. He was like a local celebrity. A band’s frontman.

“So, what about you?” One of your scavenging partners asked on the ride home. “Which one do you like?”

“They’re all attractive guys,” you say, keeping your eyes on the road. “But I don’t really think about them like that.” You feel a flush coming on. Crushes, or anything romantic, is a part of your internal world, not something you discuss aloud.

“Come on,” she prods. “You never join in. You just laugh at us for being delusional.”

“Whose us?” Rosita asks, her voice sharp, humorous, and not without judgment. “I don’t talk about that shit.” But secretly, she loved the drama as much as you and would have many questions for you later tonight about why you have yet to tell her of the town obsession of treating her friends like the cast of a reality show.

“I don’t laugh at you! I like it when you guys talk about that stuff.”

“But what I’m saying is that I didn’t let you ride shotgun this time so you can hold out again,” the girl jokes half-heartedly.

“What do you mean this time? I get to ride shotgun because I’m the one with the CDs.”

And it’s true, the only thing that cancelled out the silence of drive in moments where conversation ceased was your Oasis album playing in the background. Learning about the band was your new obsession. Much like listening to the crazy imaginations of the girls in town, you found the Gallagher brother rivalry riveting even if you only knew pieces of the story from the music, scraps of magazine articles, and by asking whoever in town happened to be a teen in the 90s. Thankfully you had hit the jackpot today though. One of the houses you visited was once occupied by a dad and daughter with an insane music collection in the living room and a smaller, more curated one in the girl’s room. After gathering what new music you wanted to try from downstairs, you also found some old issues of QuizFest in the girl’s room, filled with activities that were themed with shows you remember from when you were a kid, but the most important discovery— the find of all finds— was one of those Ultimate Guide, Complete Life Story magazines of none other than the band Oasis.

You would now probably know all of the drama between the brothers to tell a coherent story about the band’s history to anyone who wanted an escape from walker related events and farming talk. When you weren’t listening, that’s what people would come to you for: to borrow music, get recommendations, or to tell them a story. In all, you were getting the reputation of being the town’s music historian, meaning you usually used your knowledge to avoid talking about yourself. And it mostly worked.

Except for now.

“Well, if I had to guess,” the girl persists despite your silence, “I think it would be Rick.”

“What?” Noticing the incredulity in your tone, you calm your voice. Shrugging you say, “Why Rick? Everyone likes him.”

Rosita sends a look your way. It’s innocent enough, probably just showing that she is still listening on as she drives but you were refusing to look at anyone now to know for sure.

“Exactly,” the girl says. “He’s a classic knight in shining armor type. I feel like he’d talk you through it, which I think would be good for— someone like you.”

Your face is on fire, you can’t even speak properly. “I- first of all, what do you know about my experience?” you ask, the incredulous tone returning. But all you get as an answer is knowing snorts and chortles from the two women. Ouch. Nonetheless, you continue, “Second, you think shooting a guy in the head in front of his wife and the whole town is chivalrous?”

Oh—

That makes car goes quiet.

You know you made a mistake.

You didn’t mean it as crassly as you said it, and you did feel bad for saying it knowing that the situation was more difficult than you summed it up to be, but you didn’t apologize. All this talk about crushes and especially Rick made you embarrassed. It’s not that you didn't see what others saw anyway. Of course you noticed how nice Rick’s curls are, how he doesn’t have to use any product for them to look as they do; or those blue eyes and how when you get closer, they become that much more stark and crisp; or how good he was at talking to people, convincing them of things or simply just reassuring them as a friend; and that southern drawl that still sometimes catches you by surprise by sounding so pronounced at the end of certain words, making his voice that much more intoxicating. Of course you saw the appeal, but that didn’t mean you had a crush on him.

Right?

Maybe it doesn’t matter. You just felt you knew better. He was like a president. You know of them, and you believe in them, but you don’t get close to them. And it didn’t matter that he told Carl to personally deliver you a stereo he and Daryl found while out once. How he remembered how you liked music. How he told Carl to tell you this one was probably better than the old one you had, that it was louder. You only showed him your old stereo that once when he was helping you move. He was just a perceptive guy with a good memory. All leaders are like that.

Right?

Anyway, let’s get back to your crass… joke.

“Hilarious.” Rosita says and you hear the low contempt in her voice at your insensitivity.

“That was ages ago though,” the girl chimes in, saving you just a little, “and he did it to help her. He didn’t care about the mess he made. He save her. I’d say that’s pretty romantic.”

“Let’s not call that romantic,” Rosita scoffs, and despite the slight frustration, there was a quiet sadness in her voice at the memory. “That wasn’t love.”

“That was reckless, not romantic.” You agree. Partly because you truly do, but also in attempt to win back favor from your friend. “I shouldn’t have mentioned it.”

But after that day, it was all you could think about.

The idea of a knight; a romantic; someone that would do anything for you, ruin his reputation for you; find gifts from the outside that he’d send is son to give to you. Maybe you did find it charming, idyllic.

These thoughts soared in your mind so much so that on one night when thinking about boys from books or your favorite artists wasn't enough during moments under your sheets when your back arched and your fingers trailed up your thighs, your mind switched from people you would never meet to him, to Rick. Your eyes scrunched tighter, and you tried to shake it away, telling yourself it was just the women in town and the talk in the car getting to you. But then you thought about how rich and hot pink his lips looked on a bright sun-burning day and how it would feel like flames firing inside of you if he kissed you with them.

Ideas like these went on for nearly a year now. You even started questioned if maybe you had always liked him, maybe you were always just like the other girls even though tried to not be. You had thought it made you respectful, realistic; after all, how could Rick be the love of your life if he was everyone’s? Wonderings like this became even worse and more confusing when Rosita had asked if you’d like to move in with her. Becoming closer with her meant being around the leaders more often, which meant coincidental encounters and conversations with Rick as well. Quickly, he wasn’t just that president or celebrity anymore who talked to you sometimes and got you that stereo that once. He was becoming a peer— at least in some ways. One who was curious about your interests as much as your opinions. But it’s not exactly like you were in the in-crowd now as some people assumed. You didn’t get to go to leader meetings, and as much as you knew Rosita must have been telling you more than others know, she couldn’t have been telling you everything. But you did see him more than other people now, when he and the leaders came over to the house or when Rosita was invited over to theirs and she’s tell you to come too. And now, with these thoughts spiraling, you can’t help but to look back at the at the times where Rick approached you, gave you all his attention no matter how small it was and asked you about what you were listening to or reading that week, letting you ramble. He was an older guy, yes, but he cared, he actually listened, and he didn’t make you feel like the childish little sister others do.

Sadly, you did become the fawn like you had told yourself you wouldn’t be. But you couldn’t stop picturing him when you closed your eyes, and in fact, it was nice to imagine someone to fall asleep with, to wake up to. It was just going be your secret. Part of your fantasy world. But then— it all caught up to you.

Through the sliver of the open door he saw you, fingers between folds, goading yourself on as you chanted his name in whispers.

And to your surprise, he encouraged it. No, he did so much more than that— he helped you, made you come; gave you your first orgasm and made you his like no one has before.

You loved it. You gave into it. Even if it was just one secret moment. It made you give into the idea that this would continue but of course, it didn’t. He hasn’t spoken to you in almost three weeks until—

“Woah-” you gasp, almost crashing into just the person as you exit your room.

“Sorry,” you both say in unison, holding onto each other's forearms before quickly letting go. Your arms cross over into your chest before dropping as you enter your room again, clearing the hallway, and his hands go behind his back. He’s still as unsteady as you are, his mouth is slightly open, thinking of what to say.

“Hi,” you whisper tentatively.

“Good morning,” he politely replies. His eyes now smile slightly as he nods to you. You don’t miss how the light emanating from your bright room makes them shine. And he doesn’t miss how the light shining behind your figure makes you, in your white cotton sundress, look like an absolute angel.

“Good morning,” you repeat, giggling slightly, not knowing what else to say.

“Good morning,” he says again, lost and as giddy as you are.

“Oh wait— is the leader’s meeting here today?” Rick starts to nod and answers yes as you continue to speak, “I totally forgot! I’m sorry. I know I should be gone by now.”

He shakes his head, “It’s fine. I was just going to the bathroom.”

“Here? Was someone in the one downstairs?”

“Just wanted to be away from everyone when they came. Daryl and I came early so we started talking and I just- we didn’t see eye to eye on something. I needed a minute.”

You nod. That seems to be your signature when to talk to him. You hated it honestly. Often over-analyzing your words, worrying you’ll sound immature or stutter in front of him. “I'm sorry,” you tell him sympathetically. For a moment there is only silence which makes you worry he will go away, so without thinking, you ask: “I know you’re busy but, if you need a moment, maybe you would like to come in here instead?”

Rick freezes but then, inevitably agrees. As he enters, you close the door and quickly go to shut off the low playing stereo and rehang some of the dresses on your chair in the closet— you had been getting ready for the day. Rick goes to sit on the chair after you empty it but you stop him. You sit on the vertical side of your bed and guesture Rick to sit in the spot next to you, closer to the headboard. You wanted to sit next to him.

Rick doesn’t question this, maybe he wanted to be as close to you as you had, so as he sits, your thighs touch. You try not to move too much at the first contact. Still, the heat that starts to burn inside you makes you realize how much you’ve craved this. Can two weeks feel like a lifetime? It’s like you haven’t felt him in ages.

“What were you playing today?” He asks and you realize you eyes went straight to the area where yours and Rick’s legs touched. You know he noticed but still you try to answer normally.

“Selena. Rosita loves her. It’s one of her most famous songs: Amor Prohibido.”

He nods. “I probably wouldn’t understand a bit of it,” he laughs.

He would probably remember the singer from the news if you gave more context but you don’t. There is a silence that follows until you ask, “So,” starting slowly, “what’s wrong? Is Daryl aright?”

He doesn’t answer. His mouth is open as if he’s deciding what to say, but nothing comes out, so you continue, “You know, nothing is ever right in the world when Rick and Daryl fight. It makes me sad.”

The joke makes those lines at the sides of his eyes appear— a quiet laugh. “Well you know I’d never want to make you sad. Especially not you.” You two exchange a light smile while that heat rises fast to your heart. “We’ll be fine,” he finally says, but then he goes quiet again. Rick seems unsure if he wants to continue. He even looks at the door, wonders if the others have shown up yet, but— he knows he doesn’t want to leave. And even more, he knows he shouldn’t after ignoring you like some teenage boy. He decides to tell you what’s happening: “Daryl wants us to bring new people in. You know how he’s always going out there. But I think it’s way too soon.”

You hum agreeingly, but at the same time, you understand Daryl. “I think he just likes to give people what he never used to have,” you suggest.

“I know,” he nods a bit annoyedly; “and that’s a nice way to put it, but you know him, when he has his mind set on somethin’ he can be so damn stubborn. It’s frustrating. He won’t compromise or listen to anything.”

Endearingly, you try to withhold a laugh, your lisp pursing. Not only because when he says anything, it actually sounds like anythang, but because Rick sounds like he’s describing himself and he doesn’t even realize it.

“And,” he adds, pausing for a moment before he continues, scratching his beard. It looks as if maybe he shouldn’t tell you what he’s about to. His head hangs low to say: This is not information for everyone to know, okay? But the last time he went out there with Glenn, the reason Glenn’s arm is in a sling right now, is because they met a group, tried to bring them back and before they could make it even close to home, the group fought ‘em, tried to steal what they scavenged, and almost kill Glenn.”

You widen your eyes at the statement. You actually already knew this from Rosita, but that will stay between you two. All you feel is humbled that he felt he share it with you, despite it being a dark thing. It was a close call. Rick was right for being very cautious right now. “Wow,” is all you can get in before he speaks again.

“Imagine if we lost him. Fought this war with his wife and unborn baby at the time for nothing? So he couldn’t even meet him?” Rick shakes his head, and you notice his foot tapping lightly, making his knee bounce. This had happened a month ago now but it was obviously affecting him. “It was reckless and I told him that. That right now we need to be focusing on what’s inside these walls. People have only just started getting back to being comfortable now; to feeling like this is a home.”

Your eyes remain wide, “We did so much rebuilding you.”

“We did complete rebuilding.” He corrects, though not rudely. Shaking his head, he goes back to talking about Daryl: “I think I made it seem like what happened to Glenn was his fault. So not only were we arguing but I must’ve hurt him,” Rick realizes, “and now he definitely won’t be back today— maybe not even until next week.”

A silence hangs in the air after this; it seems he finished. Now, you know you should speak, but as the silence continues, you grow more unsure of what to say. Issues like these are things you’ve never dealt with. You didn’t want to say something stereotypical.

“I’m sorry I’m putting all this on you.”

“No, no,” you quickly console, trying to think. “Um, well,” you say, starting unsteadily, “this is probably going to sound stupid and not helpful. I don’t even remember the exact context or what was truly said so it might not make any sense either but, do you remember when I had my Oasis obsession? Earlier this year?”

“I do,” he laughs, turning his head over to your music table. His eyes scan any of the visible album titles to see if he can find it, but the print on most of them are too small. He turns back to you as you continue:

“This is going to sound a little far off but I think you and Daryl are like Liam and Noel.”

His eyebrows furrow, “Didn’t those two hate each other?”

“I mean, yes— but it’s much more complicated than that to me— but no, I don’t mean in that way. It just that there is this quote Noel says that I don’t remember exactly, but I really liked: he said that even though he wrote the music and Liam did the singing that Liam meant the words just as much as Noel did because they’re brothers and he wrote them. I thought that was beautiful, but…” you trail off.

He stays silent, trying to give you space to find your words but you feel like you’ve gone too far. It’s all pretty convoluted and not a true comparison to what’s going on that you’re even confusing yourself a little. “I think what I mean is that even though they have their different roles, they still feel very similar things and believe in the same purpose. I think that’s like you and Daryl. You two are so similar yet so different. But there’s still a binding force that always brings the two of you together. So, like I’m sure you already know and I didn’t even need to tell you, but you two will be okay. You two have different ways of doing things, but the music or the life you’re trying to create in Alexandria still has the same meaning to the both of you.” You laugh small and breathily as you end. “That probably didn’t make sense.”

Rick smiles to himself. “I didn’t get that first bit, with the quote, but no… that made a lot of sense to me.” He nods toward you and you return his smile. “You’re so bright. You know that? Not everyone knows how to stitch things together like that the way you do.”

This makes you feel good. Rick thought you were smart. You know you should say thank you, but instead, something else comes out: “May I, may I kiss you?”

“Yes,” he answers, almost stuttering it out, a hint of hesitation before he did, but he nods so kindly, so reassuringly as he tells you again: “yes.”

Your fingers touch his lower cheeks lightly, feeling the bristles of his beard. You’re slow, and careful, and scared. Your fingers linger on his jaw for a moment until they completely caress his right cheek and then you move in, swiftly— worried you’ll lose your confidence, worried he’ll change his mind. You catch his lower lip and seal the kiss. Your lips are locked for a few seconds until you retreat. It was nice, and exciting, but short. You knew you could have put your tongue in his mouth. You believe he would have let you because you remember when he did it last time, but you didn’t want to embarrass yourself by doing it wrong and once again reminding him how much you don’t know. But you’re sure giving him a grade school kiss like this one was enough of a reminder.

Your eyes roll down, chin low. Your cheeks are on fire and your hands do not know where to go so you start fiddling with the hem of your dress and then you laugh. You were trying to be courageous this time, and you were, but you also weren’t.

Rick grabs your left hand, holding it at the end of your thigh, “I liked that,” he says softly.

“You did?” You ask as softly as he, eyes meeting his.

A short, airy snicker comes out, “Mhm,” he hums, giving you a closed-mouth smile. He found you simply adorable.

“Can I… try it again?”

Rick pulls on your forearm, attempting to bring you closer to him. “Yeah,” he nods, voice gentle. “Do you want me to help?”

You nod before you speak, happily accepting, “Yes.”

He puts your hands on his shoulders. One of his grabs onto your waist and the other holds you lightly under your chin, adjusting your head to meet his lips. The first kiss he places holds just for a couple of moments as the one you gave him did, gentle but packed with longing. The next two are slow, pretty pecks that already have you melting at his touch, lips agape waiting for the next one. The fourth is the one where he brings his tongue into your mouth, carefully bringing it in quarter by quarter. He tastes the top of your mouth and tongue and you feel him as he slowly starts to explore how far you may like to go, but truly you become stagnant other than your hands that press into his shoulder. Luckily, Rick either doesn’t notice your hesitation or is already silently helping you as he takes the lead, pulling you closer by the hips and slipping his tongue in and out of your mouth to kiss you more. It makes you smile— the excitement of your first make-out session. You giggle, and then it makes him smile too and your teeth slightly bump into each other. Accidently you nip his lip because of it, making you pull back.

Your fingers hover over your lips as you impart a quiet apology but Rick just shakes his head giving you another quick kiss instead. He starts to move back on your bed, back pressed again the headboard and he tells you quietly, “Come here.”

You get up and sit higher up on the bed as well, calves folded under your thighs. He takes one of your legs and starts to put it over his as he asks, “Is this okay?”

You nod, vigor growing as you do it now, thrilled to sit on his lap. Your dress bunches around your hips and the tops of your thighs. You move closer to press your chest into his and you kiss him first again, another small one but with intent as you look at him afterward, feeling the scratch of his beard on your fingertips as you smile at him, in awe that this is happening.

“You want to try this time?”

“Uh,” he means you put your tongue in his mouth this time, but you’re afraid to do it wrong but you know you want to say yes so you do, “Yes, okay.”

So he brings you in again and you kiss him. He mouth opens a little and you try to bring your tongue in slightly but you teeth clash. “Sorry,” and quickly he responds that it’s okay and rubs your cheek, telling you to just open your mouth a little wider, no teeth, let your tongue go on top of his.

You try it. Your tongues meet again, licking each other tips before you slowing press in more, your chest touching his as you try to close the gap.

Rick starts slowly rocking your hips against his and he takes control of the kiss again. It helps you not think, you like it. And you like the feeling of that incoming tight bulge starting to form under his jeans, but then you let go. “Wait,” you say, “I like this.” You pause for a moment, confusing him more as to why you stopped. “But… there is something I wanted to ask you.”

“Okay,” his hand stay fixed on your hips and waist, rubbing soothily, “What it is?”

Another pause. “I feel nervous,” you whisper.

“You have no reason to be, sweetheart. You can ask me anything.”

You laugh, smiling as you look off to the side. Anythang.

He smiles too, although unknowingly to what you found funny. His head tilts as he tries to find your gaze and turn it towards him again.

“Well, the last time we were together here you taught me how to do something. You taught me how to pleasure myself better so,” you stutter, “I want to pleasure you. If that’s okay. And I was wondering if you’d teach me how- to touch you here.” You remove yourself from straddling him and point in the direction of his cock.

Instantly he feels a stir of his already hardening dick.

This is not how he expected things to go this time. Or truly, he didn’t expect any of this at all, but when you asked to kiss him he decided he would be gentle, more giving. It felt like you wanted him to take again, the exact thing he was trying not to do. “I feel like I took advantage of you last time.”

“Rick…” you shake your head. “I’m the one who didn’t close the door all the way. You asked if it was okay and then you asked if you could go faster. I said yes to everything…” You start to worry— is he second guessing everything now?—“I feel maybe we remember this differently.” You bow your head again now. Feeling ashamed, wondering if he did.

Rick places one hand on your knee to comfort you although he still says, “It’s just that I’ve never done something like this before.” His thumb sways on your skin. “I just don’t want you to end up feeling like you’re wasting your time. Your first times.”

You’re surprised, “It’s so funny how you can be so self-assured in front of a crowd and now you don’t think you’re good enough.” You take his hand and press it towards your chest. Your heart was racing. “I like you. So much.” You swallow as he says your name softly, realizing how fast your heart was going. “No one in town is truly ever mean to me or anything, and Rosita has been so kind with letting me move in with her and we talk and its nice but, you know— she has her flings and her friendships that are separate from mine and everyone just always seems like they have their person and I just don’t. I don’t have my person, or any person.” You remove your hands from your chest but Rick still holds onto it, squeezing your hand as you start speaking again. “You’re kind, Rick, and you make me excited, and you remember things about me… “ If your face could get any hotter, it does, “And, well, you’re very handsome. If you could teach me again, I would like that.”

God… Rick was trying to be a romantic yet you were so adamant on getting him off. He laughed inwardly, shaking his head, deciding that the best way to handle this situation— and make up for some of his guilt as he was trying to— would be to give you the thing you say you want and not what he thinks you want. Suppose that’s one for widower’s wisdom.

Decidedly, Rick gets up from the bed, giving you a once over, still admiring how adorable, and how sexy, you look to him with your feet under your lap, hands on your knees as you look up at him from the bed and your white dress. He starts undoing his shirt buttons. “Remember when I did this the first time?”

A smirk came on, there’s the Rick you remember. Blue eyes intense, and voice getting cocky as he gets ready to give you what you need, what he knows you only want from him.

“Yes,” you say quiet yet with budding excitement. You start going for the hem of your dress, “Should I start taking this off too?”

“Mm, stay like that.” He’s taking off his belt. “Thought you looked beautiful in it right when I saw you.”

Your thighs squeeze together slightly. Rick Grimes was undressing before you, for you, and calling you smart and beautiful all the while.

As Rick lowers his boxers, his cock springs up. He returns to his spot on the bed, back leaning against the headboard. All of a sudden he seems to truly recognize that he is the only one exposed. He would tell you what to do, guide you, but in a small way, in a way you probably didn’t realize, you were in control. It seems that each time this happens— although it’s only been twice— and each time he talks to you— which has been plenty— you steal a little more of Rick’s heart and he just can’t stop it.

“So,” he clears his throat, your eager eyes on his cock making him twitch, “you usually just wrap your hand around, start from the base and keep pumping up.” He shakes his head, “there’s not too much too it but it’s best to keep your hand light at the start, you—”

You nod quickly, “May I?”

As he nods back you, “Yes.” And as he says it you’re already licking your hand.

“Is it okay if I spit? That helps right? Or is that nasty to you?”

He’s caught off guard, “No, no, that helps.”

So you do and you place your hand lightly at the base as he said and you start to pump. Instantly, he lets out a gasp, and the next noises that follow are repressed grunts and groans. You want to ask him to stop doing that but you’re a little scared to speak up that way just yet and you’re too engrossed in how you can see the light veins of green and blue on him and how he’s so red at the tip. It was honestly exciting. Just this, touching him with your hand, staring at his member and watching him twitch as his mouth opens to pant lightly. It still felt unreal but you liked it and you were happy to learn. You start to pump him more towards the top, placing your thumb on his slit- pressing in. His abs clench at that. You push in a little harder and you squeeze your fist around him a little— testing it out to see what happens—and he groans, unadulterated this time, “oh, fuck.”

The heel of your foot that’s under your lap pushes into your center at that.

You start pumping faster. “Am I doing good, Rick?”

Hearing your voice sets him off, “Fuck, sweetheart. Yes.” He’s honestly choking out each of his words, he didn’t expect to get so turned on by all of this. He realizes the last time he had sex was with you that first time, and before that… he can’t even remember. “You’re doing an amazing job.”

As you pump, you start to slow down, only doing it shallowly towards his base. You’re feeling confident and you kiss the side of him, licking a fat stripe up to the top and then you pump him fully again.

“Oh, fuck, yeah,” he breathes out. He wants to tell you to slow down but it comes out of nowhere, he stutters before he can even speak. An unintelligible groan mixed with a moan comes out abrupt and louder than he intends and white spurts of liquid come out.

You go faster for a few moments, then start to slow down, a little unsure of what is best to do, but you notice when you start squeezing him a little more as you continue to pump up and more whiteness fall out from inside of him.

“Did I, make you come?”

“Yeah,” he says, huffing.

“I did?” your cheekbones rise as you ask with awe— it was another first for the books.

Rick’s tries to let his embarrassment fade, he can tell you were just excited about it, but still, he looks down and to the side, avoiding direct eye contact— almost like you typically would. You peer at him, almost nervously because of it. Rick is usually the confident one. “Doesn’t always happen that fast,” he explains.

“Well before a month ago I didn’t know how to make myself come so I wouldn’t know,” you say with self-deprecating assurance. You had heard from the girls in town that it was easier to make men orgasm. You already had it in your head as something not to judge. You wonder how hard he must have been restraining himself the first time he placed himself inside you, or if it just happened to be easier for him that time around. “I didn’t expect I could do it or anything really. I thought it was…” you smile while giggling, “interesting.”

“A good interesting I hope.”

“Very,” you assure. “I liked it.” You kiss his cheek as you take some wipes that are by your night stand and you start cleaning him up. He doesn’t tell you that you don’t have to; he helps along with you.

“You sure you’ve never done any of this before?”

You shake your head. “I just read fiction books.”

He smiles to himself, a quiet snort of laughter leaving his nose. You always surprise him.

When you two are done cleaning, he puts his boxers back on. Quickly, he is on the bed again and starts to kissing you. Rick holds your shoulder and pushes you down. Finally, it’s time for his redemption, he feels. It was your turn to be pleasured. Just like he wanted to do from the beginning.

Rick kisses down your neck to your collarbone, and the parts of your exposed chest and he pushes your dress up past your hips. His lips move back up to yours, kissing you more before saying, “I really wanna show you something sweetheart.” He presses his thumb into your clit over your underwear. “Can I kiss you down there? Have you ever had that before?”

You shake your head slowly, eyes wide. “I-” you start nodding your head, “-I would really like that.” And in such a small voice you add, “Please.”

Rick kisses your cheek. Deep and softly he breathlessly tells you, “I would love to.”

Rick moves his head lower and gives you slow kisses over your underwear from your mound to the end of your lips. He starts to drag your panties over your legs and once they’re gone he kisses up your thighs. Then his nose rubs and sways ever so lightly on your lips. He breathes in and it makes you shutter. Your heart is going crazy again. Finally, he licks upward. One long and languid stripe ending with a kiss to your clit and then he truly begins.

Tongues are wet and sticky and everything you ever dreamed of. Your eyes roll back instantly from that first lick and kiss. You remember a time when you started touching yourself that you used to never think of receiving oral. You thought it was scary, nasty, that you wouldn’t like it until the moment you thought about it as a million kisses on your most sensitive lips, or someone liking you so much that they’d get drenched by your wetness just to touch you, to taste you. After that, you thought about it all the time and now it was finally happening– someone needing you so much they just had to know what you taste like. Here he was: kissing, licking, sucking, not caring about how he looks but only how you feel— you now knew what it was like to be desired.

Rick presses his tongue flat on your clit, rubbing deep circles. His eyes are open, looking up at how your mouth opens wider and wider. You let out little whimpers, enamored by his tongue, still deciding if you like the scratch of his beard, but your eyes stay glued to the ceiling, scared to look at the scene below.

He gives you kitten licks in between speaking, “Look down. Don’t miss your first time.”

Your eyes go down slowly, watching as he gives open mouth kisses to your clit and right lip, tilting his head. He stays there for a moment, hearing your short and breathy pants, kissing and licking your clit and lower lips like they were the ones above your chin. His eye contact sends bursts of sticky wet fluid down your hole and you release a whimpered moan, they’re always sp short and soft and high pitched. He can tell you like it but he can also see you’re nervous. You don’t trust yourself, you know it, and he’s starting to realize it too. You’re scared of completely letting go.

He peppers kisses to your clit before moving upward, his tongue rolling and mouth kissing from your lower stomach to your breasts till his face reaches yours again. “No one’s here,” he tells you. He then kisses your lips allowing you to taste yourself for the first time. “Relax,” he whispers, rolling out each syllable. He holds your chin with one hand while he inserts a finger into your hole with the other, his pointer is instantly drenched and you shudder at the feeling. His single calloused finger reminds you of the time he was last inside you. He pumps slowly, looking into your eyes as he speaks, “Don’t think about who could come downstairs.”

“What if Rosita or Daryl come back?”

“What if?” He says it so simply as if he’s ready for everyone to know. Truly, that would be an issue, but right now it was not about him and it was completely about you; he wanted to give. It was short-sighted, reckless, yes, but… you were just so pretty, so bright, so insightful, and he felt like he needed to make up for all the taking he did last time, of your first time. Rosita had went to run after Daryl, hopefully no one was here anyway. But again, he didn’t care. It didn’t matter. “Lay back,” he gently commands, “forget what I said before- close your eyes. Just give in to it. Like I’m the only one who's here.”

Rick licks zig zag stripes down your slit and then he decides to insert his tongue in your hole. He goes as deep as his tongue allows, collecting your wetness and trying to swallow it in moments when he turns back to kissing. He his nose is brushing and rubbing up against your clit as he sucks wetness from down below and you start letting out stringy moans you can’t control. Soft, pretty, and continuous, “uh, ah, uh, uh” that turn into “sorry, I’m sorry.” You’re still self-conscious about your own noises. This was still only the second time you’ve heard the sounds you make when someone else is fucking you.

But Rick shushes you. Giving small kisses to your clit as he looks up at you, seeing your scrunched eyes and open mouth. “I like knowing you like it, pretty girl. I like all those pretty sounds you’re making.”

Your pussy tightens around nothing at that phrase.

“Keep going. You don’t have to be shy.” He grabs your chin and you look down at him. His beard is wet. “We’ve already made a mess anyway.”

He starts kissing your labias, licking up wetness when you decide to ask, nervously, “Can you make sounds too?”

Instantly, Rick goes again to kiss your clit, humming into it as he sucks. Breathing against you he says, “Want me to tell you I like it, sweetheart?” His tongue slides down again, tongue reaching into your hole and he moans into your pussy.

Your back arches and you mewl, you could almost scream.

That’s it, he thinks. Rick keeps humming and groaning into you now. His voice is so seductive. “I love tasting your pussy, baby.”

You couldn’t breathe.

Rick starts rubbing your clit with his thumb and going fast with his tongue in your hole “My bright, pretty girl gonna come for me? Hm?”

“Oh, Rick, I want to. Please, Rick.”

Rick starts to go faster and your brain turns to mush. Only noises coming out and when he stops his tongue movements to say something more you push his head down. “Sorry,” you say. You’ve never been forceful before but he says nothing, just continues going down on you and taking his free hand to place it over his, gesturing that he wants your hands in his hair. You tug on his curls and he grunts into you. You start chanting his name and then he switches to placing his lips on your clit and putting two fingers in your pussy. It reminded you of the first time but instead of your three fingers they were two of his and it felt so much better than you ever knew before, better than you could ever do it yourself. It sets you off. Your eyes shut tighter if they could. “Rick! Oh my god,” you moan and then again and again and then you come.

Rick laps at your cunt, vigorously trying to wipe you clean. He makes it look like it will be the last and only time. It makes you worry but at the same time he looks so sexy like that; needy for you even after you finished.

He takes your wipes and cleans his lips before cleaning you up as you did for him. He kisses you thighs and your lips and your cheeks as he continues. “You did such a good job,” he says. “You always do.”

You’re filled with pride at that. “Thank you.” Then worry sets in. You realize how public you’ve made everything. “Did I just ruin your life?”

He laughs while caressing your thigh. That anxious expression of yours that he just got rid of returns after all the work he did.

“I’m gonna check downstairs. Okay? If they’re there, they’re there.” You nod. We already made a mess anyway, you remember him saying. “They might want to start the meeting when I go down so, whatever happens, happens alright? You didn’t do anything wrong.”

Your eyes are still nervous, but it’s all too late anyway. “Okay,” you respond.

“Okay,” he says back, kissing you once more. As he dresses himself again, he tells you, “I promise I won’t wait two weeks to see you again.”

“I’d like that.”

“Me too,” he says as a send off and goes into the bathroom to clean his face.

When he reaches the living room, there is no one. Rick is thankful but confused.

As he nears the coffee table there is a sheet of yellow lined legal pad with a talkie next to it.

Call when you’re done, it reads.

“Rosita?” He questions into the device. Who else could it have been, right?

He can almost hear the grin on her face. “They should start calling you Reckless Rick for all the agony you put these Alexandria girls through.” She pauses for dramatic effect. “There’s just something about that stupid hair cowboy accent, I guess.”

Before he can respond, telling her that it’s absurd to think of him as a playboy, that he was far from it, she continues:

“So, fucking my roommate? You’re glad Glenn and Maggie called everyone over to theirs instead. Hershel took his first steps while you were teaching someone else how to take theirs.”

She unpressed the button to suppress her laughter. “Just get over here,” she concludes, putting down the walkie and going back to meet the rest of the group with a perfect poker face. She tells everyone Rick will be here shortly.

Oh, Alexandria’s leader and her new little best friend who has been hearing the townswomen’s fantasies of him for years: Reckless Rick and his reckless romantic girl.

Rosita would give you so much shit for this when she gets home.

[randomitemdrop]

you've posted a few ai generated images as items lately, and i'm wondering if that's intentional or not?

Short answer: no, it wasn't. Aside from a few I made when the generators first became publicly available and all the images were gooey messes, they've all been reader-submitted, although I'll admit I didn't catch the snail-boots. Personally I think AI image generators are a more nuanced situation than a lot of opinions I've seen on Tumblr, but given that they can be used so evilly, I'm steering away from them, if only to avoid the Wrath of the Disk Horse.

Long answer, and this is just my take, if you want to really get into it you'll have a much more interesting conversation with the people with devoted AI art blogs instead of me occasionally sharing things people submit:

There have been some major cases of unethical uses for it, but I think it's important to remember why AI image generators are such an issue; data scraping and regurgitating uncredited indie art is bad, but in the case of the snail-boots, it was just a fusion of one dataset of "product photos of boots" and another of "nature photos of snails", which I would say is not depriving anyone of credit or recognition for their work (MAYBE photographers, if you're a professional nature photographer or really attached to a picture you took of a snail one time?) I get the potential misuses of it, but when Photoshop made it easy to manipulate photos, the response was "hmm let's try and use this ethically" instead of "let's ban photo editing software". Like, I'd feel pretty unethical prompting it with "[character name] as illustrated by [Tumblr illustrator desperate for commissions]" or even "[character name] in DeviantArt style", but I'd have a hard time feeling bad for prompting with "product photo of a Transformer toy that turns into the Oscar Meyer Wienermobile". I know there's the question of "normalizing" the services but I think that overestimates how much the techbros running these things care about how everyday consumers use their free products, preferring to put their effort towards convincing companies to hire them to generate images for them, and in that case they respond way better to "here are some ways to change your product so that I would be willing to use it" than to "I will never use your product". For example here's one I just made of "the holy relic department at Big Lots", fusing corporate retail photos and museum storage rooms.

TL/DR: on the one hand I understand the hate that AI gets and it's not something I'm planning on using for any of my creative projects, but on the other hand I think it's overly simplistic to say it's inherently bad and should never be used ever. On the third hand, I really hate participating in arguments over complex ethical philosophy, so I'm just gonna steer clear entirely.

[storiesoflilies]

18+ // explicit smut // MDNI

gladiator!toji fought with all the wrath of the gods in the arena to ensure his victory, because victory meant he would live for the night and return to his home, his heart.

“shh, my love,” toji groaned lowly, a light sheen of sweat on his brow, his veined forearm across her breasts. “the others will hear us.”

she gasped loudly, and he shoved two of his fingers into her mouth to silence her moans. toji bent his legs, bucking his muscled thighs to drive his cock deeper into her plush wetness, eliciting sweet, muffled whines from her. she arched her back into his broad chest, reaching a hand behind to grasp his midnight locks between her fingers, the strands still caked with the blood of his enemies.

her slick trickled down his heavy balls as they slapped against her, as she lay atop his body – a body that was art, a tanned marble statue crafted by the gods themselves. he fondled her nipple, teasing with featherlight pinches around the hardened bud, and she drooled against his fingers.

“i kill for you,” toji huffed into the curve of her ear, gripping and squeezing her breast. “everyday i kill for you, for this. so i can come back to this tight, sweet pussy of yours every night.”

in these moments, they were fueled only by fire and lust, driven to chase their pleasure from each other. she whined again, sloppily sucking on his fingers, and toji growled, pounding into her with renewed vigor. he reached down to rub quick circles on her clit, feeling her clench and pulse around his thick cock.

toji moaned, his breaths hot and heavy against her neck. “let go for me. give me what i fought for, my prize.”

and let go she did, her head tipped back in pure white ecstasy as her legs and pussy shook from the sheer force of her orgasm. her juices squirted and splashed messily against his calves and dirtied mattress, and she couldn’t help the moans escaping her lips. toji continued to thrust into her, both his calloused hands on her hips as his balls tightened.

“cum, my gladiator,” she purred, pussy squelching lewdly as she licked his strong jawline.

toji groaned again, his hips stuttering as he shoved himself as far into her as he could go, thick, hot ropes of his cum filling her up. he’d plant a piece of himself deep inside her, where he could stay for a while in the sanctuary that was her body and soul.

until the next night came.

©storiesoflilies 2024, all rights reserved. please do not plagiarize, translate, or repost any of my work on other sites! i only post on ao3 and tumblr.

[namwool]

fave shen jiu fics? i need to read more of him!

I'm incredibly sorry for answering so late!

I made a list with everything I've read and liked so far, hope this helps and can somehow make it up for my lateness! I tried to link the fics but tumblr is being a little bitch, so I had to remove them.

Also, this list includes smut as well, make sure to read the tags!

Liujiu (This is my fave couple, I dream of them like 24/7)

Ongoing

Twin Lotus by s_unfl0wer

The Orchid Grows Where Others Cannot by Iwannabe_lieve

The Wrath Of The War God by NazakiSama166

Devotion by NazakiSama166

Through The Well by NazakiSama166

To You On The Other Side by blackflowertea

Completed

'til death do us part by blackflowertea

The Sword And His Shield by blackflowertea

reluctant romance by backspacedintooblivion (Evil_and_I_know_it) 

Bamboozled Into Parenthood by Renyo 

Surrender by xpityx (Restricted)

Would you dual cultivate with me? by FakeAlice

talking is hard by technorat

Curse of the Black Moon Flower by cannon_fodder

skyfire circle by mercurials

night time, hide my eyes by technorat

One Night of Sleep by Otno (restricted)

Flower of Fondness by mohuji (togaki) (restricted)

Tainting You by scumshizun

A Necessary Darkness by xpityx (restricted)

push furniture in front of the door by formerlyknives (restricted)

Je te laisserai des mots by xnemone (restricted)

Utterance by EasternWarrior

spar with me by revesdelimonade

best laid plans by revesdelimonade 

My annoying demon by FakeAlice

forever and ever and ever and ever by pennydaniels

Mamazun by shorimochi

An unexpected visitor by Parmse

Traces by shypersomniac

Give Me Your Best Scripts by Dandesamm

Guide Dog by FakeAlice

a trip around the ninth sun by ectocosme (restricted)

hustling for the good life by Chesra

Jingwei by xnemone (restricted)

Indebted by UmbrellaMartialGod

it's that talk again by revesdelimonade

you and i by backspacedintooblivion (Evil_and_I_know_it)

it’s a crime you’re not around most of the time by backspacedintooblivion (Evil_and_I_know_it)

Loving You is Easy by Anonymous

uh... you fight good. by saccharinings

behind the scenes and be vulnerable by Anzie (anzie)

The Downfall of Cang Qiong by Anonymous

Sweet Nectar by Anonymous

altar by fencesit

your long tongue runs along my heart by ectocosme (restricted)

The War God's Redo by GT_GoldenTrashbag

Convenience by Phnx

A Poor Choice Of Words by Pancakes_With_No_Clean_Fryingpans

Comfort by xpityx (restricted)

LiuJiu Week 2022 , Promise , Rewritten by xpityx ( all 3 restricted)

like real people do by revesdelimonade

This Omega Just Want His Off Days by shorimochi

In This World by Ehann

tag team carry romance by Chesra

an open/shut case by Chesra 

Alcohol Free by Dandesamm

make sure i die first by pennydaniels

we should stick together by pennydaniels

you're my best friend, i'll love you forever by pennydaniels

Autumn Leaves by dead_leaves_fall_like_tears

Mirror of Truth by dead_leaves_fall_like_tears

Affection curse by FakeAlice

BREAKING NEWS by mohuji (togaki) (restricted)

be good to me by pennydaniels

As the West Wind Blows by demoniqt (restricted)

to tell you the truth by leviiio

Look Into The Mirror And What Did You See? by Invidia_Envy

you got a way (of making me feel insane) by backspacedintooblivion (Evil_and_I_know_it)

Gold Amidst Snow by ClearAutumnVibes

Evil Blankets and Senseless Shidis (These Maddening Delights Have Surprising Ends) by I_dont_know_anything_im_sorry

Marital Bliss by Aledono

Who had you was? I yes you would by technorat

Opposite by Ehann

Two Peak Lords Walk Into A Flower Field (you won't believe what happened next!) by Space_Samurai

Secondary When Compared To You by I_dont_know_anything_im_sorry

Old Ghosts Haunt These Hallowed Grounds by xnemone 

Mu Qingfang / Shen Jiu (this one is kinky. You've been warned.)

Just what the doctor ordered by Space_Samurai

In the carriage by Sakuja

Poisonous Love or Mu Qingfang is a psycho bastard by Sakuja

Doctor's orders by Anonymous

Too Much But Not Enough by Anonymous

healer's prescription by ectocosme (restricted)

etch me a third eye to see deeper by ectocosme

make it hurt by technorat

Shen Yuan / Shen Jiu (This one is my guilty pleasure.)

Almost Perfect by kiseki_pop 

Taboo by Anonymous

Captive by Anonymous

five times shizunyuan couldn't get off by YandereDay

I (26m) drank my best friend’s (28f) breast milk by Kasasagi (restricted)

the reports of my death have been greatly exaggerated by zigur_zig_ah

Romancing the Villain for Dummies by Chesra

You're the pink in my cheeks (And I'm scared 'cause that means I'm a little bit soft) by BambooSpirit (restricted)

One Thing or Another by Ilthit

the places where others gave you scars by Blue_tea06, Chesra, SteamingOwl

I Don't Take Insults Lightly by D20Owlbear (restricted)

Perfectionist Complex by YandereDay

Dear You by YandereDay

A coat of copper and a bamboo fan by BambooSpirit (restricted)

Press A to romance the Scum Villain by BambooSpirit (restricted)

Tianlang-jun / Shen Jiu (The potential of this couple is honestly amazing.)

Tie Me Down by Anonymous

Seducing the Villain's Father by demoniqt (restricted)

Remarried Empress by demoniqt (restricted)

True Treasure by MissMegh

Spread your Wings by Araceil (restricted)

Gongyi Xiao / Shen Jiu (Cute. That's all I have to say about them.)

Home is With You by Anonymous

Plum Blossom by hasa3810 

Honey Sweet by jeejaschocolate

Because I admire you Master Shen by IrisEvergreen

The Love Letter by shorimochi

Qiu Jianluo / Shen Jiu (pls don't judge me for this one, I am desperate for more Shen Jiu content.)

Mend, Scar by Anonymous

a whiff of coffee and healing, by im_sevenn

Dirty Laundry by im_sevenn

My Life in Your Hands by shorimochi

Target Captured by Anonymous

An unlikely savior by Midnight_illusi0n (not really Qiujiu, but I kinda hope??)

Xiu Ya / Shen Jiu (listen... desperate times calls for desperate measures, ok?)

I've only got Xiao Jiu for one day and if something happened to him I would kill everyone. Period by ectocosme

Through The Time by Invidia_Envy

Bingjiu (.... I have no excuse for this one. I am terribly ashamed.)

What it Means to Fall by xnemone  (restricted)

youtiao by revesdelimonade

The Touch Of Your Hands, The Taste Of Your Lips by mercury_retrograde

Finally by Shireyaki

Spring Flowers by xpityx (restricted)

an inch of longing, an inch of ash by xpityx (restricted)

bigger, not better by backspacedintooblivion (Evil_and_I_know_it)

Matrimony by spearpoint

The Court of the Night King by 1V1

to break your teeth on love by dearly_anonymous (restricted)

Tale as Old as Time by mrblank8l, shorimochi

When the puppy met a little snake by FakeAlice

Satisfaction Guaranteed, I'm Your Sunshine by YandereDay

Where He Cannot Follow by bloodsongs

No thank you, next! by singlewheelrolling

The Adventure of Bingpup and his Tsundere Shizun by CrazyNekoChan

It's Not Much, Goodness Knows by Anonymous

You are not alone, not anymore by Elis98

Through the Looking Glass by FarawayDreamer (restricted)

and perhaps the greatest grief is being left in a universe where you are gone by sweetlolixo

the hands of fate (my achilles' heel) by Chesra

Soft Skills by beelzebaozi

Smug Kitten's Splurge-Spending System by Anonymous

I didn't put it on the list because it's the most popular and easier to find through the tags, but Yinhua is also one of my faves.

I think I covered everything?

If anyone has anymore suggestions for some other fics I can read, please let me know!!

[devildomwriter]

Obey Me As Tumblr #30

Luke: Capitalizing every word in a sentence is vomit-inducing

Satan: Enjoy Your Trip To Puke Land, Boy!

Solomon: This is a strong contender for my favorite exchange I’ve ever seen on the internet

•

Leviathan: Despite how horrifying horse are they don’t have the requisite dexterity to play league of legends and therefor they will never be as disgusting as us

Thirteen: Horses don’t need limbs to play video games their brains are wired right into the mainfr

Mammon: They fucking killed her

Thirteen: *in a horse accent* no I’m fine!

Leviathan: What the fuck is a horse accent?

Solomon: Oh you know

•

Leviathan: What are YOUR resolutions for the new year?

Mammon: 1080p

Leviathan: Back to Hell with you

•

Asmodeus: Feeling highly lustful on this night and a little bit gluttonous

MC: Sluttonous

Asmodeus: You have my vote

•

Diavolo: Why don’t more Pokémon have blood based attacks?

Leviathan: …Where would the blood come from?

Diavolo: The Trainers

•

Satan: I really really wish I was a cat, I’m not built for this capitalist society but I am built for sleeping 19 hours a day and knocking things over.

•

Raphael: My Etsy page consists of (1) cursed doll found in the forest and nothing more

Mephistopheles: Do you know what curse it is?

Raphael: Curse that makes you sell it on Etsy

Mephistopheles: Oh sweet find I’ll go check it out

Mephistopheles: My Etsy page consists of (1) cursed doll found in the forest and nothing more

•

Satan: Friendly reminder use your turn signal

MC: Hey I’m from Tennessee I don’t understand this post?

Satan: Show this post to the horse you ride around on he’ll take it from there

•

Diavolo: Sometimes people don’t do anything TECHNICALLY wrong but still should get smacked for lacking empathy, or being Logan Paul

Belphegor: Does Jake Paul count in the smacking? Or only Logan?

Diavolo: There’s TWO?

•

MC: Feeling slothful today my friend

Belphegor: Then snooze

MC: Worry not, I am also gluttonous, and highly wrathful

Lucifer: Are you trying to hit all 7 before dinner?

MC: UH OH HERE COMES LUST

•

Asmodeus: How do you think of the funny things you say?

MC: I kidnap the writing cast for Big Bang theory and whip them in a cage until their screams resemble a sentence

Simeon: Big Bang theory isn’t funny (:

MC: Their screams are

•

Mammon: Flip phones are still dope and I’m waiting on them to resurge

Thirteen: Like we need more proof that you aren’t a drug dealer

Mammon: I’m a slut for mid2000s technology, not a slut for meth

Solomon: I’m a slut for both

Mammon: I don’t like this post so much anymore

•

Solomon: New year new me *casts a spell that morphs me into a horrible creature*

Asmodeus: *milks you*

Solomon: This is the worst comment I’ve ever got on any post

•

Luke: Ahhh where do ravens go when the sun goes down !!! ?

Simeon: Why do you think the sky is black at night?

Luke: :O

•

Diavolo: Banishment is the funniest punishment I can think of. Just get out of here.

•

Leviathan: If dumbasses can find love, so can this dumbass

Mammon: High Key this is actually really inspiring

Leviathan: PLEASE stop relating

Last • Next

[newnlovesjennie]

one piece fanfiction recommendations!!

i figured i might shine light on some of my favorite fanfics from the one piece fanbase in case anyone was looking for some reading (if any author wants something taken down, please lmk!)

note: these are all on ao3 !!

☆⋆。𖦹✮ ⋆ ˚。𖦹 ⋆。°✩°‧★☆⋆。𖦹✮ ⋆ ˚。𖦹 ⋆。°✩°‧★☆⋆。𖦹✮ ⋆ ˚。𖦹 ☆

favorite luffy fic:

bring me home by citrus scented

summary: “The sky is beautiful like this, don’t you think?”. He makes a face that melts into another grin when you laugh. “You know,” you say, “when it’s so clear and blue that it looks endless. I feel like I could just float up into this sky and go anywhere I want to.”  “You can already go anywhere you want to,” Luffy says. He picks at the grass, digging blunt fingertips into the cool earth. Nami will scold him later for having dirt under his fingernails. “If there’s somewhere you want to go, then just do it.”

luffy/reader, wc: 12.3k

cw: depression

favorite zoro fic:

the universe told me by rudimentaryflair

summary: It’s just his luck. He doesn’t even go looking for his soulmate, and he finds him anyway. (Or, snippets of a love story, as told through a series of soulmarks.)

zoro/sanji, wc: 13.5k

cw: none

favorite nami fic:

tiny tangerine speckles painted in your eyes by kermit_coded

summary: nami and all her ghosts.

nami & the strawhats, wc: 1.7k

cw: past child abuse

favorite sanji fic:

don't be weary if we're broken by blueh

summary: the Vinsmokes somehow end up on the Strawhats' ship after crashing the Big Mom's Tea Party and not everything is as right as it seems.

sanji & the strawhats, wc: 3.2k

cw: past child abuse

favorite usopp fic: 

In like a lion, out like a lamb by hongmunmu

summary: Fall on us and hide us from the face of him who is seated on the throne, and from the wrath of the Lamb (Revelation 6:15-17). In the wake of what transpired at the Pirates Festival, Luffy and Usopp take a deeper look at their relationship.

usopp/luffy, wc: 12.8k

cw: none

favorite robin fic:

(my favorite fic out of these!)

when the warm air comes by bluewalk

summary: seven prompts from frobin week on tumblr

robin/franky, wc: 4k

cw: none 

favorite franky fic:

i saw you and suddenly the world wasn’t by WhirlyBird70

summary: Take me to sea with you! She had yelled, tears falling from her eyes but some impossible dream in her heart, and a craziness no one but a Straw Hat could match. She was a mess, bruised and tired and chained but seas –Franky had never seen a soul more brave and beautiful than hers, with such faith in miracles that were unseen and unthought of. He caught a glimpse that day, of who Nico Robin truly was.

robin/franky, wc: 1.1k

cw: none

[babygirlhaljordan]

quotes that remind me of dungeon meshi characters (a thread—or tumblr equivalent)

senshi

“for every life i can’t save during my shift, one more drop of blood becomes a part of me.”

if you saw the episode regarding senshi’s backstory… you’ll understand why this quote fits. at a young age, he watched his entire party die from starvation. consequently, he studies cooking (with monsters) with a crazy intensity to starve off hunger. to never have more drops of blood join him again—especially with his suspicion that he ate his own party members. so in the case of senshi, others blood is genuinely (or believed to be) Apart Of Him

(tldr senshi’s survivors guilt goes CRAZY)

chilchuck

“his mouth may be full of acid, but gentleness oozes from his actions like chocolate syrup dripping down whipped cream.”

we all know that despite chilchuck’s professionalism (emotional distance) he isn’t as hardened off as he wants us to believe but i feel the episode that encapsulates that is when that one ogre confronts him like. “you’re worried your friends will die aren’t you” while he’s sobbing his eyes out. THAT sticks out to me.

if you ignore that episode, there’s still tons of moments from the season alone that showcases how much he cares. chilchuck trying to wake up marcille from her nightmares. deciding between following senshi or laois to protect them from other people’s wraths. facing the red dragon HEAD ON despite him Not Being A Fighter. he cares about people DAMMIT but he’s the last person to let others know, covering any harsh actions with his words—be it teasing marcille, snarking at laois, or more. yet his actions say more than what he could & that is enough

itzusumi

maybe this is what being a mortal is about. kindnesses that aren’t deserved

this resonates as itzusumi because of her inherent selfishness. even though she’s only appeared at the latter half, throughout the series, she’s been shown to prioritize herself above all. and that isn’t to say she isn’t deserving of kindness as one of her rights as a Basic Human Being but. people tend to follow the golden rule from my experience—ESPECIALLY when the other party has been rude (which itzusumi has been)

so to have laois’ party treat her with kindness (with chilchuck literally APOLOGIZING for his comments) is really heartwarming. most people would have given up or left her by now. yet his crew treats her with kindness even if she hasn’t been the best. that’s why i feel the kindness is undeserved

as for what a mortal is… that’s a question all the characters are finding out, but itzusumi (& falin) are finding out above all. as beastmen, they aren’t seen (or even seen THEMSELVES) as human. yet they are both being treated with kindness despite their actions. and i think that sticks out to me above all

marcille

“If it’s heaven’s will for us to part, I will rip heaven into pieces with my own two hands to be with you.”

falin’s transformation to a literal chimera is kickstarted all because marcille refused to let the dead rest. although the dungeon can easily allow for the revival of humans… bringing back people when they’re too far gone, when they’re already devoured.. it crosses the life between life and death, the natural order of existence. yet marcille crosses that line, of what’s considered natural or “fate” (aka what is determined by the higher order—heaven) of them parting and ripped it apart

she brought her best friend back to life.

because much like senshi, marcille is someone characterized by her losses & what she will continue to lose due to her being a long-lived species. she knows this and has been continued haunted by her past losses: her bird, her father, and i have no doubt there’s more. it’s why she studied forbidden magic: to no longer lose the people she loves. and she doesn’t care what boundaries or rules she breaks because she loves them That Much (sounds like another magic aligned user eh?)

falin

how do you separate a tiger’s beauty from its ferocity? or a cheetah’s elegance from the speed of its attack? achilles was like that—the beauty and the terror were two sides of a single coin

we all know this is referring to falin in her chimera form because while i do love her prechimera the series mainly focuses on her in that form than without. although she is dangerous, she is powerful. and in the same way, so much as she’s powerful, she’s dangerous. her existence is beautiful but it’s an example of hostility. of the potential of forbidden magic as well as the drawbacks. she’s truly two sides of the same coins

laois

“i think we sometimes make the mistake of thinking monsters are abhorrent aberrations, lurking in the darkest recesses, when the truth is far more distributing. the most monstrous of men are those who sit in plain sight, daring you to challenge them.”

this goes into manga spoilers so. if you’re not okay with that… skip this section

i wholeheartedly believe this quote fits laois due to his own negative experiences with humans. for YEARS the villagers of his home casted out falin (and him, to some degree? could be wrong) treating her poorly for who her ghost abilities. similarly, his parents struggled to stand up for them, leading lapis to have a strained relationship current day. and when he left to join the army, he struggled to fit in.

as a result, laois would dream of being a monster (and also developing a monster interest in general) for their power—especially when they could crush all the people that bullied them. his love for monsters represent laois disconnect to humans—especially with the way they treated the ones he loves. because despite the monsters being seen as the scary ones, he experiences more anxiety around humans than he ever does with beasts.

[viirtualvoiid]

frosted kisses

You're beginning to regret agreeing to a snowball fight. You should have learned by now to not accept Ajax's offers.

childe/gn!reader wc 0.9k a/n: 1st post on tumblr! decided to start posting my works here. i'm not super proud of this one but oh well :') read on ao3

You’re beginning to regret agreeing to a snowball fight. You should have learned by now to not accept Ajax's offers. You crouch down behind a rock, the cold air biting at your face as the wind blows your way. Looking around and listening closely, you watch for signs of him. He could be here, he could be anywhere.

Heart beating fast, you swallow and ready yourself for an attack. You look up, snow dancing down onto your face, wincing when a snowflake lands in your eye. You’re just gathering a snowball when you watch one narrowly miss your face, coming behind you/ You whirl around, and there he is, grinning and giggling a bit, breaking into a run. Damn it. You didn’t even hear him coming. It’s a bit scary, how skilled he is at making himself hidden if he wants to be.

Rushing after him, the freezing air nips at your face, but you’re determined. You throw a snowball at him and miss, as he ducks it with a smug smile. You gather more snow and run after him, cursing him, as he evades your wrath. Tossing a few more at him, you manage to hit him a few times, but he’s fast, losing you quickly. You make yourself run fast, faster, though you have a feeling this is a battle you’ll lose. Ajax is faster, and he's more adjusted to running in these temperatures. You, however, have far less stamina, and, with this being your first visit to Snezhnaya, feel like your lungs are frozen. He runs towards the forest and you curse to yourself, knowing you'll have to be mindful of roots now. As you dash through the forest, the trees lining the sides becoming a blur, you shout, "Ajax, I swear, I'm going to kill you!" Laughing breathlessly, he calls back, "I'd like to see you try!"

You run until you can't take it anymore, just as you reach a clearing. Finally deciding to stop, you look at him, and upon hearing your steps cease against the snow he hesitates and looks back. Taking advantage of this opportunity, you spring towards him, and tumble into him, catching him off guard as he falls backwards. You both collapse into the snow, you laughing as you both fall. A smug grin forms on your face. You catch your breath, holding him down as you remain on top of him. You take in your surroundings. You spot a snowman, wrapped in a scarf Ajax brought, and your heart melts at the sight. It's so childish, so innocent, so sweet, that it makes you fall for him all over again. He must've built this earlier, when he was bored hiding. You're snapped out of your thoughts when Ajax starts struggling, but you quickly grab handfuls of snow, dropping them on him. When you drop some on his face, Ajax lets out a yelp, sputtering and rubbing his eyes. “Does this mean I win?” You quip with a smile, and he pouts. “Fine. You’re lucky I was going easy on you.” He says bitterly, bottom lip in a cute pout. You roll your eyes, though it may be true. You’ve seen how he throws an arrow, you can only shudder to think what a snowball at full force from him would look like. Ajax speaks again, voice whiny and reproachful “You'll see. I handed you that win, I want a rematch. Next time, I-”

You shut him up with a kiss, gently pressing your lips to his. His eyes flutter shut and he takes in the feeling of you, moving a hand through your hair. His lips are warm, soft, and you think you could stay like this forever, lying in the soft snow with him. You deepen the kiss and he makes a soft noise, letting you consume him, his mind full of only you, you, you. Eventually, you must pull away. You peer down at him, admiring your conquest, looking at his red face, flushed from the cold. The blush spreads out beautifully on his cheeks and nose, like paint, and freckles scatter with them. You want to trace every one of them, map the constellations on his face, for even all the stars in the sky couldn’t compare. Your eyes drift to his, which open again. and he blinks a few times, embarrassed.. You admire the beautiful blue color to them, like the water he controls, and the way his long and pretty lashes flutter, as well as the small bit of red eyeliner he’s carefully applied. He clears his throat and you snap out of it, raising a brow.

“So. A rematch.” He says with a grin. “How about it?”

You sigh. “Maybe later. I want to go inside.” He frowns, disappointed. “Tapping out so soon? You’re no fun, I expected better.” You glare at him, knowing he’s trying to rile you up. It won’t work. “I wanted to play with your siblings anyway.” you murmur, kissing his cheek. His expression brightens at that, a fond smile replacing his smug one. He loves how you interact with his family, how you seem to love them just as much as he does, how you treat his siblings as your own. “Fine. I’m still gonna beat you, though. Even if you all get on one team. Just watch.”

Standing up, you extend your hand, and he takes it. “We’ll see.” You say, and as you walk through his frigid homeland with him, you still don’t think you’ve ever felt warmer.

[the-archangels7]

hi! were the archangels!

im raphael, the only one with a prior tumblr account ( @theetherealraphael ), so go check me out there for more stuff! i use he/they/it/any neos for pronouns, and im married to @shakespeare-official-account! my sin counterpart is envy, and i created space, and i can heal!

my name is onfiel. xe/him. my sin counterpart is sloth. i created the animals.

howdy, im gabriel! (and no, i dont act like the one from good omens, please stop asking me that!) i created humans, and my sin counterpart is wrath. he/her/xe!

samael. xe/she. dont make me and raphael interact. theyre a fucking asshole who doesnt know how to calm the fuck down. i created the earth and all the plants. my sin counterpart is greed.

hi there, im uriel! i created emotions and stuff, such as lying, and love! i use they/xe pronouns, and my sin counterpart is lust.

hey, im zachariel. he/it/xe, please. i created colours, and helped with plants, not that samael would tell you that, hahah. my sin counterpart is pride.

and im michael. i created scientific reasons for everything the others created. she/xe/they pronouns for me, and my sin counterpart is gluttony.

((( hi! uh, basically, this is a gimmick blog for my lore! feel free to send asks to the archangels lol. youll be able to tell its me and not ic raphael bc therell be brackets around the text, so keep that in mind! and if you want to send an ask to me specifically, head over to my main, mentioned earlier in the post! )))

[inthelittlewood]

do you get reminded of your real old series much anymore? im a fan from when you did your ni no kuni: wrath of the white witch playthrough, and i tend to put that playlist on when i'm not feeling jazzy. i expect folks are talking more about Evo than anything else, esp on tumblr given our love of that series and extrapolating its lore, but does anyone ever bring up kingdom of the saplings or yogbox or any of the old yogs smps (did... did we even call em smps back then??)? folks were mentioning the christmas advent-ure in the chunklock stream, but that one might just be because it was an amazing series and its that time of year. just wondering, because being a content creator (as yuck as the job title can be) is a real unique position and ya have a LOOOOOT of content the younglets these days might not know of.

happy holidays by the way ! all love and respect from indiana (USA)

Oh for sure! I've had so many different 'arcs' in my career, which has now spanned over a decade so when I meet people it's such a variety of nostalgia mentions

Minecraft, The Escapists, Zelda (numerous), Mario Maker, Fortnite, Overwatch, Jet Set Radio, Ni No Kuni, VRChat, Pokémon, the PO Box and loads more

I'm glad I was on it with making playlists of my series back in the day because it makes them easy to find on that tab of the Fortnite channel nowadays

I'm incredibly grateful for people's support for this long. I still don't know when the bubble is gonna burst 😅

[diaryofanidiot]

The Neverland Curse

Summary: MC is on the receiving end of a strong curse. They've been reverted back to a child until they can earn a meaningful memory from each of those they care about. It's up to the Demon Brothers & co. to care for them until then.

CW: de-aging, cursing, slight nyctophobia, tantrums

Chapter List: Prologue 1 2 <3> 4 5 6

Taglist: @avatarofstars @botensbabygirl @mothmothmothmothmothmoth @akira-chan8 @rinizitos @pastatownsystem @stabbylikesnukes @urhigh42 @princessparadisebaby @abadonkori @lucifersimp333 @coffeeandtealol @maxx0inwonderland @letsblazewolf

(Tumblr quit shrinking my gifs >:( )

After what seemed like the hundredth outfit Asmo had me try on, my mood soured. The one he currently had me wearing was the worst by far. It was scratchy and way too warm. Not to mention my annoyance at his millionth squeal right next to my ear about how 'cute' i was.

If any word summed up this "fashion show" as he called it, the word was torture.

"And to top it off..." Asmo reached into a bag and pulled out a funny looking hat. "A cute beret!"

I pushed the foul object away from me. "Azzyyyyy" I whined. "No more. I don't want it!" He was closer than he realized to feeling my wrath.

"Hush. There's only a few more outfits."

I stomped my foot. "No!" I was starting to miss Beel's helicopter treatment. I tore the scratchy top off, feeling better in the tank top underneath it. Finally, my skin could breathe. With a huff, I threw it down and stomped on it. "No! No! No!"

Asmo looked in horror at the way I treated the clothes he just bought me, as if I've just slapped him in the face; but didn't make a move to stop my tantrum.

"Alright, get it out of your system." He sighed, folding up the remaining clothes. I kicked the shoes off, too, before flopping on the floor with a pout. He pet my hair soothingly.

"Huh. Human tantrums are very... mild in comparison." He giggled.

I kicked my feet indignantly and buried my face in Asmo's sweater. He shushed me in an attempt to quiet my frustrations. I heard the door click behind us.

"Asmo, what do you think you're doing?" I heard Mammon's voice but didn't bother looking up.

"(MC's) just got some big emotions right now. I'm handling it."

Mammon must've seen the cause of my distress in the form of clothes piled everywhere. "Like hell you are."

I felt hands wrap under my armpits as I was lifted into the air. I whined and continued to bury my face in Mammon's shirt after he got me situated on his hip.

"Maman, make Azzy stop." I mumbled.

Asmo shot a glare at Mammon. "I'll have you know, Lucifer sent me to get clothes for them. It's only necessary to try them on. Plus they looked so adorabllleee" I felt his fingers lightly pinch my cheek.

Mammon held me tighter and turned me away. "Like I give a damn. You're exhausting my human."

"Your Human?!" Asmo shrieked. "Like you could take care of a kid!"

"I'd be the best at it!" Mammon countered.

They continued bickering for at least another five minutes. I clamped my hands over my ears. Everything was too much!

"Now look what you did!" Asmo was seething. Mammon was holding me way too tightly. Before I knew it, fat, hot tears began to roll down my face.

"No more!" I cried. The two froze, unsure of what to do. Next thing I know, I was yanked out of Mammon's arms with a speed too fast to process. I rubbed my eyes to see a blurry vision of Satan through my tears.

He didn't say anything, and neither did the other two. The look of anger on his face was enough to silence them. The very definition of If looks could kill.

With one last warning look, Satan carried me away while I struggled to stop crying. I could feel him taking deep breaths as we walked.

The bouncing movement of his walking slowly calmed me down until I could look at him. The scowl on his face was scary, but he's saved me from being smothered twice now.

I patted his cheek lightly. "TanTan, mad?"

The scowl quickly turned to a look of surprise as he stopped in his tracks. A chuckle broke free from his lips as he looked at me with bewilderment.

"TanTan, huh?" The chuckle turned to a full laugh. "Even as a kid, you know how to cheer me up. No, I'm not mad. At least, not with you."

I nodded before gently biting on the top of my thumb. "Where goin?"

"It's your bedtime. Those two idiots kept you up way too late."

I shook my head. "Not Maman. He was trying to help me."

"Even so, you need sleep. Belphie was meant to be in charge of that, but who knows where he could be right now." He opened the door to my room and set me down in the connected bathroom on the sink counter. "Cmon, let's get you ready."

I watched as he prepped a toothbrush with paste and held it out to me. "Think you can do it on your own?"

I nodded and took it. I must've made quite a mess trying because he soon took it back. "Here. Open."

With a huff, I sat with my mouth opened while he helped.

I could've done it.

"Alright, now spit." He wiped my mouth after I complied and helped me down. "Will you be comfy sleeping in that?"

"Yea but I'm not tired now." I pouted, returning my thumb to my mouth. He promptly removed it.

"None of that. You'll make yourself sick. And don't lie to me, I can see the tired in your eyes." He poked my cheek.

How dare he. I'm not a liar.

He lifted me back up and set me down in my bed, pulling up the covers around me. "Since you aren't tired, maybe a story?"

I perked up at this. "Yes, please!"

He smiled and told me to wait there while he left to pick a couple out. When he came back, I had plenty of options to choose from. After much thought, I chose the one with the dragon on the cover.

"Good choice." He smiled. "Now get cozy"

"TanTan?' I asked, moving further down the covers.

"Yes?"

"Will you stay with me? Til I go to sleep?"

He nodded, tucking me in the rest of the way. "Of course."

He pulled a chair up and began reading. His voice was nice, and he even gave the characters different voices. Occasionally, he'd swipe his eyes from the page to me. Not that it was needed, it'd be hard to tear my attention away from the fantastical story about a dragon on an adventure to find his family. I was hanging off every word.

But his words eventually turned into white noise as my eyes were forcibly closing themselves. The last thing I felt before drifting off was a hand on my head and a soft

Good night.

<----------------------->

My eyes opened to a dark room. Nervously, I looked around. Satan had left, and now I was all alone. I looked out the window but it was still dark.

Oh right... no sun.

I couldn't tell what time it was, but the dark was starting to scare me. Every shadow could turn out to be a monster or something trying to get me! A whimper escaped my lips as I pulled the covers tighter.

My hand brushed against something fluffy before I remembered Bloo was on the bed with me. I clutched the stuffed bear to my chest as I worked up the courage to get out of bed.

I swung my feet of the side of the bed and quietly ran to the door, Bloo in hand. Reaching up to grab the door handle, I slowly pushed it open. It creaked ever so slightly. I paused, eyes wide in fear of something hearing me.

"Gotta be quiet," I whispered to my bear. I knew he'd understand. The hallway was very dimly lit, clearly most everyone was in bed. Or so I thought.

A blue light emitted from under one of the doors in the hall. Maybe somebody was still awake? I clumsily knocked on the door, hoping somebody would answer. An answer I shortly got.

"Password?" A tired voice called. I recognized it but couldn't remember who.

"Um..." I frowned. Why was there a password? Not fair. "I don't know..."

Shuffling sounds could be heard on the other side before the latch clicked.

"Sorry, Hen- er.. (MC), I didn't know it was you. " Levi's hair was disheveled, and a gaming headset sat crooked from his neck as if he fell asleep during a session. "You okay?"

I clutched Bloo closer to me and shook my head, staring down at my feet. "It's dark."

Levi shifted his weight, seemingly unsure of himself. "You wanna hang out in here? The aquarium keeps the room lit through the night."

Nodding, I let him lead me into his room. My eyes widened at the sight of it. I hadn't been shown the bedrooms on the tour, and this one was even cooler than mine.

Slowly, I walked toward the giant aquarium that felt more like a view into the ocean. A single goldfish stared back at me. Levi smiled.

"That's Henry. I think he likes you." He mused, kneeling next to me.

"Hi Henry..." I whispered. He pressed himself against the glass where my hand lay before swimming off again. I glanced around once more, looking at all the posters and figurines on his shelves. "Who's that?" I asked, pointing at a poster whose face appeared plenty in different parts of the room.

"Ruri-chan!" Levi grinned at my interest. "She's the absolute coolest. In fact, if you like, we could watch one of her movies."

I perked up and nodded. I was no longer sleepy, and a movie sounded great. He pulled up a bean bag in front of his TV and motioned for me to sit while he got everything in order.

"Not this one... this one you need to know previous lore, this one has a bad guy too scary for them.." Levi continued to mumble to himself while he sorted through a pile of DVD copies. "Ah! Here we go! The Magical Ruri-Hana: The journey to the unknown. Perfect for your age right now."

He paused for a moment after putting it in. "I'll have to sort which episodes of the anime you can watch later. I'll make a list so we can binge it."

Levi was buzzing with excitement, occasionally muttering to himself about getting to show me this all over again. My confusion grew once more. I've never seen this before. What did he mean again?

"Ah! Sorry! Ignore me." He must've noticed the puzzled expression on my face.

The bean bag was large enough to share, so I made room for him to sit with me. I felt the weight of the bean bag shift as he plopped down onto it. Next thing I knew, the TV had my full attention as the opening scene began.

Levi must've been up a long time because his initial excitement was soon replaced by quiet snoring about halfway through the second movie. Despite my fixation on the film, the sounds of everyone in the house waking up kept distracting me.

Carefully, I poked Levi's cheek. "Vi... it's morning."

"Hana.. Ru.. needs saved..." He breathed out, still fully asleep.

The footsteps and muffled talking in the hallway outside the room grew more frantic. I decided to pay it no attention while I watched the rest of the movie.

Bzzt

Bzzzt

Levi's phone buzzed on a nearby table, slow notifications at first soon grew to a consistent spamming. The footsteps outside grew louder til they were right outside the door.

The door swung open, hitting the wall behind it with a loud bang. Levi jolted and sat up.

"We can't find (MC!)," Mammon yelled right before his eyes met my widened ones. "...(MC)?"

"Hi Maman!"

"How many times do I have to tell you! Password entry only!" Levi yelled before falling back onto the beanbag. "They're in here with me."

"No shit I can see that." Mammon scoffed before turning his head to the hall and shouting. "They're with Levi!"

"Oh sure. Make this a family gathering, why don't you? Stupid Mammon..." Levi paused the movie while the others crowded the doorway.

The full attention of everyone so early in the morning set my nerves aflame. "...am I in trouble?" I asked, barely above a whisper.

Asmo was the first to respond, pushing past Mammon and grabbing my shoulders. "No, hon. You just scared us when we found out you weren't where we thought you were. It's a big house and you could get lost."

I nodded softly and watched as the brothers gathered their emotions.

"Couldn't sleep anymore. It was too dark"

"We'll get you a nightlight." Lucifer suggested, being the last to come in the room. "For now, let's go have some breakfast. You have a big day today."

I took his hand as we all dispersed, aside from Levi, who wanted an extra ten minutes of sleep; and followed him to the dining room.

"What big day?"

"There's two more people who'd like to meet you." The corner of his mouth formed a small smile. "And after that, we need to go see Solomon. He's figured something out about our...current predicament."

I wasn't sure who wanted to see me, but I do know that I was excited to see Solomon again. Happy with the answer, I set my attention on breakfast.

[genericpuff]

From the standpoint of someone who doesn't even like LO that much. Reading through this gave me a strange sense of discomfort? I think. Something about the combination of the essays, and the digs at the author in a lot of posts, and making a community based on it, and the ranting. It made it feel a lot more group ragging on something than normal fandom re-writes. I can't help but want to say something on the subject (0/3)

Gonna respond to all your asks together if that's okay, from what I can glean there's a word limit on mobile (?) so it makes it very interesting to see who's able to put all their thoughts into one big ask vs. who has to cut them up into parts 😆

So I can understand that discomfort, it's actually one that I also initially felt towards the community when I discovered it. Though even more so because when I found out about antiLO being a thing, I was still a MASSIVE fan of LO and my thought was "wow, these people are losers" LOL but then a lot of what they were saying resonated with me more as I realized the story was going nowhere (it was around the trial arc when Eris was revealed to be the 'reason' for Persephone's wrath).

All that said, I don't think I was wrong to feel off back then even though I don't feel that way now. We have our own takes and ways of approaching certain subjects, and how we feel is how we feel.

I will say that I can't, in any way, take credit for 'creating' the community. AntiLO pre-existed me by years and I was simply welcomed in as my opinions of the comic changed. I was a lot more involved in UnpopularLoreOlympus when it was born around the S2 finale of the comic. So... don't give me any sort of credit in 'owning' this community or anything of that sort, I came in during a period when criticism of the comic was becoming more common practice. I'm just also someone who's very verbose and loud in their opinions which appeals to a lot of people in this community, so I get why people might see me as some kind of "pillar" within it or like I'm the loudest person in the room, but I promise you that doesn't mean I have any sort of ownership over this part of the fandom or that I feel my opinions carry any more weight than the people around me. It's just a community, after all, not a religion.

It's true that saying I'm not making money off Rekindled doesn't mean I'm not benefiting off it in other ways. But the 'benefits' are still kinda... nothing? in the grand scheme of things? like okay great I have loads of people reading my stuff every update but like, this is still just Tumblr lmao none of this is real and as soon as Rekindled is over, I might be lucky to bring some of the readers over into my next project, but I doubt whatever I do next will get as popular as Rekindled was. All the "benefits" I get are virtually the same as what people writing fanfiction get on AO3 get or what people doing redraw videos on Youtube get. It's fake Internet points for making fan creations.

And that's okay, because that's sorta just the nature of fandom in general, throughout any niche community. People will be naturally drawn to what's familiar and what I do here appeals to the people who are familiar with LO and the criticisms of it, often people who agree with those criticisms. The Zelda community has LinkedUniverse, Pokemon has Hanamusa, Attack on Titan has communities that are dedicated to loving the anime, hating the anime, and even dunking on people who don't 'get' the anime, Undertale has every single crazy rewrite and rewrites-of-rewrites that have been spawned from its fanbase. Did you know there's an entire community of people who discuss and argue over fire alarms? I didn't, but when I found out about it, it was after listening to a video on Youtube discussing all the interconnected drama of the fire alarm community. Like that's wild and seems so stupid and pointless... but it matters to the people who are in it, and my opinion of how they operate isn't going to change how it makes them feel to be a part of that space. That's kinda just human nature, we create our own little microcosms of things to bond over so for people within those microcosms, any amount of disagreement or discomfort will feel massive in proportion.

I guess the point of what I'm trying to say is that a lot of this stuff feels crazy loud but it's really only that loud because it's occupying a single room.

The reality is that Rekindled is still a very niche project dedicated to a niche webtoon that's a part of a niche medium. As loud as it is within here, it's still only because it's such a closed community. Anyone outside of the Webtoons community has zero clue what it is. The 'attention' that I'm getting is still from other niche people who occupy a very specific interest.

And that's not even exclusive to Rekindled, despite Webtoons attempts to sell LO as a 'worldwide phenomenon', a lot of people don't know it exists and couldn't care less. Does that mean my rantings about the comic and its creator matter any less to me or the people who are interested in them? Not really. Is it all pointless? Maybe, but not everything really needs to have some bigger point. We're all kinda just here spending time talking about something we both love and can't stand. What I say about LO and do with Rekindled is undoubtedly inconsequential and pointless to people who aren't in the room. That's fine. That's why I keep it all in my own house. There are definitely people who talk about it outside of the home but that's far from what I can control.

That said, I think LO also does fall into a very unique category where it's very easy to do rewrites and redraws of it simply because it, in and of itself, is a rewrite. Rekindled is far from being the first "fix it" fic, not only of LO but also of any piece of media in general, it's not really a new phenomenon (but again, when it's loud, it can be easy to go "well clearly YOU had to influence this"). People are drawn to retelling LO or 'fixing' it because LO is based on Greek myth. If it weren't for that, no, I don't think people would be as interested in doing so. It's because we literally have a solid foundation of reference material - the myths and original poems - that we can go "hey, why did LO do this? it should have / could have been xyz". You can't really do that as much with a purely original work besides wish fulfillment of "what if xyz happened" because whatever an original piece of work winds up being is clearly what it was meant to be. We have nothing to compare it against.

But with LO, we know what it could have been because we know what it was trying to be since day 1 - a retelling of the Abduction of Persephone. That's not to say we always knew exactly what Rachel was planning on doing with it, but it's not hard to be disappointed when we see certain mythical stories being established in LO - such as the tale of Eros and Psyche, the Titanomachy, etc. - only to see them get dropped or completely mishandled.

On the one hand I could use HADES and Stray Gods as examples of popular media that don't get 'rewritten' the same way LO does because while they have their own unique interpretations of the myths they're based on, they still feel like properly thought out stories that appreciate the source material. LO, by comparison, feels like it's written by someone who hates Greek myth.

But on the other hand, those rewrites may absolutely exist and I'm just not aware of them because I don't occupy those rooms! The world is only as big as we perceive it to be.

That said, it's always sort of ironic to me when people say Rekindled is "riding off the coattails of LO" because while I can understand their sentiment - because obviously it's a direct re-creation of LO - that opinion seems to operating from the assumption that LO was ever not riding off Greek myth's coattails to begin with.

And no, I don't think my criticizing of LO on an LO-focused blog should in any way be conflated with "media isn't allowed to be bad". I've said this before and I'll say it again, I'm into loads of bad media. I'm also fully capable of enjoying a piece of media but also shit-talking it without actually feeling any sort of vitriol towards it. House M.D. is one of my favorite TV shows but goddamn some of the plots are just so dramatic and out-of-this-world that you can't help but laugh at them (and that's why we have spaces like /r/okaybuddyvicodin LOL). One of my favorite games growing up was Starfox Adventures because I had never played the original Starfox games but I had played loads of Zelda and Adventures was basically Zelda but with Starfox, and I know there are plenty of people who will go "but puff, that game is ass!" and I know! But I love it regardless.

With LO, it's not a matter of "bad media shouldn't exist!" it's a matter of observing what makes it so bad and why that's had a negative impact on both the audience it attracts (primarily teenagers and children) as well as the culture it's taking its ideas from. If LO was just some "so bad its good" webtoon that was easy to enjoy but also poke fun at, I would have zero issue. It's the fact that it's blatantly problematic in its writing and intentions but still hailed as the #1 webtoon on the platform (webtoons in and of themselves being a medium that I've lived in for over a decade so it's virtually impossible to get away from whatever is influencing the culture as a whole) while winning all these accolades for being "brilliantly written" and its creator is given a voice over Greek culture when she herself is not Greek or even well-read on Greek culture in any capacity - that's the issue and why I've spent so much time talking about LO. And if it wasn't me, it would be anyone else, because the problem has been around for ages and people have been trying to get the word out about it for years.

I don't necessarily think every 'fix it fic' is built equally. I think it's a case by case thing. A lot of people are deadass just doing it for fun and to be a part of a community, and I think that's wonderful. There are also people who try to do this but ultimately disrespect whatever the creator was going for by somehow implying that their own original ideas were inferior just by existing, or using their fix-it fics as a way to deliberately harass the original creators (ex. whatever the fuck 'art lore' is on TikTok, based on what I've seen it seems purely made for bullying budding artists and talking shit which is... gross af, but I don't think it's anywhere near the same as readers of LO calling out its highly successful award-winning creator for having zero clue what she's doing with her comic lmao). I don't think a blanket statement of "fix it fics are bad" accomplishes anything because it depends on a variety of factors like the person's intentions and what they're trying to accomplish. Many fanfictions in general could be called 'fix it fics' even if the creator 100% loved the source material with zero issue - because they're still saying "what if xyz happened instead"?

Me, personally? I'm someone who loves Greek myth and who used to adore LO. I was very discouraged and upset when I saw it turned into what it became, and I wanted to try my own hand at creating something new out of the rubble that could give me closure. It's what I choose to do with my time and other people seem to enjoy it as well. I'm sure there's loads to criticize and speculate on regarding my 'intentions' in creating it, but at the end of the day I'm sorta just doing what I want to do with my time because I have a lot of thoughts and ideas I need to get out of my head and many of them are thoughts and ideas that other people like reading about.

If you feel uncomfortable by the amount I talk about it here and the way I talk about it, that's fine. Those are your feelings. There are loads of other antiLO-themed blogs to read that might not give you that same vibe. Even I have certain icks towards certain opinions within the antiLO community, I've seen some people be genuinely shitty and I'm sure that's ironic to hear considering you're describing your own discomfort towards my stuff, but we all have different tolerances towards different things at the end of the day.

I do my part to keep things in my own house of a neighborhood that's really small in the grand scheme of things. It just feels like a big neighborhood if you don't travel. There will inevitably come a day where I'll pack my boxes and move elsewhere, talk about new things and write essays about other topics. That's obviously not today but I definitely don't want this to just be like, my entire identity or the rest of my life LOL it's just something I've chosen to spend my free time doing and I'm content with that. Maybe a year from now I'll feel differently, who knows? At the very least I'm hoping to one day finish Rekindled because no, I don't want this to actually be my identity for the rest of my life, change is a good thing LOL but what that change will bring is, for now, a mystery. Here's hoping wherever I end up at least brings its own uniquely good times like I've had here :' )

Sorry, that was a very long response with a lot of sorta aimless muddling over the topic at hand, but thank you for the opportunity to discuss it regardless ! because I do think it's important to find that 'grounding point' when it comes to stuff like this. because as much as I get riled up over LO, yeah, at the end of the day, it's just a dumb webtoon and I don't wanna go soiling myself over it LOL but I'm also just like... running a Tumblr blog with my personal thoughts and ideas, no more or no less. Even the "attention" I get is still only 200-400 notes per new episode of Rekindled, which pales in comparison to any real metrics of "success" imo LMAO again, it just feels loud because this is a niche community made up of a lot of the same names and faces; step outside of it and no one gives a shit LOL