#tw abusive situation

[ishouldhavejustchangedname]

The fucking disrespect people are showing Amrouranth now, I'm not following what's going on with that situation but there's people attacking the way she's dressing because that's how her husband made her dress

But like the difference is she has free fucking will to do that now?? How are people so ignorant like please learn even the basics of respect and consent please

[wildbasil]

things haven't been great but i think they will be. eventually 🌻🌼🩷

[therapythoughtstogether]

Upcoming Zoom therapy session under my current circumnstances

TW brief mention of abuse and domestic violence

As I've mentioned before, this guy who is "hosting" me has become like my shadow. He doesn't leave me alone except when he's sleeping, and I cannot go out anywhere alone.

I had originally scheduled the usual in-person session with my therapist for next week, but this guy told me that he would take me there, wait for me outside the building and pick me back when I'm done. I honestly don't want him to know where my therapist's office is located, so I requested to change the meeting to Zoom modality.

I absolutely hate online meetings. I have to see myself when the camera turns on and in the viewfinder and that distracts me. My body dysmorphia gets really bad. Plus sometimes the audio quality is not great, there are connection issues, etc. And I just miss seeing my therapist in person.

My "host" will be in the next room listening to music or watching something. I won't be so free to discuss my current situation. So I emailed my therapist to give him a heads up, and to find a way in which I can at least express my frustration regarding what's going on, without putting myself in danger or in an uncomfortable situation.

We decided that when I need to talk about what's going on here, my therapist will ask me Yes/No/Maybe questions, so I can give some information and he can give me some feedback and advice without giving away what we are discussing, until I can see him in person and talk freely.

And as I've mentioned before I have plenty plenty of other trauma to sort through, like the violence I experienced with my ex, for starters. So we won't be short of topics for sure...

[arctasy]

shelby’s recent statement on twitter

[nerdpoe]

Young Justice is always a little...concerned. With Phantom's living situation. Now they're outright afraid for him, and Bart has decided it's time to Ask An Adult.

It was the little quips. The tiny little things. Stuff that didn't seem to matter to Phantom at all, or appeared to be normal for him, that he didn't realize weren't normal at all.

"Oh, better not hope my mom catches me." "Doing what, staying out past bedtime?" "Nah, using my powers; she'd vivisect me!"

"Another stab wound. Great." "Don't worry Phantom, I've got the med kit-" "Oh, I'm not a baby or anything, I can handle it just fine. Just gimme a sec to take it out."

"My dad has better aim than that." "...Like, when he's hunting, right?" "...At what other times would he be shooting at me?"

"Huh. Not as bad as my parents place. Look; they have a decontamination shower!" "Phantom, this lab has been vandalized to the point of needing a hazmat suit." "Did I stutter?"

Finding out each others identities did nothing to soothe the worry. Tim quietly told the others that every time he tried to run facial recognition, he kept hitting a government firewall he couldn't breach. Phantom never told them his last name, just his first, and 'Danny' is super common.

The thing that really did it though, the thing that made Bart snap and run off to ask Max, was when Danny had a nightmare.

He was talking in his sleep.

"No. Don't-stop. Stoooop. I need...my skin. Mom, no. You can't...peel off...my skin..."

Bart didn't even wait for them to wake Danny up before he was standing in front of Max, talking a mile a minute as he tried to figure out what to do, with Wally staring in horror over a plate of waffles as he computed everything that Bart was saying.

~~~~~~

Danny had a dream about his mom and Skulker arguing about how to skin him. He wouldn't really call it a nightmare, because it was just Skulker, but the scariest thing was Skulker insisting to his mom that it was possible to skin him with a potato peeler. Dream mom was arguing that it was not, and that from a scientific standpoint that was a really piss poor way to preserve a specimen.

He hadn't been begging them to stop hurting him, he'd been whining at them to knock it off.

But when he wakes up, it's to a room full of worried friends and an old man who calls himself Max.

"Kid, I think we need to talk."

[give-grian-rights]

hey guys how SHITTY OF A RESPONSE do you have to make, for DreamWasTaken to make a better statement than you? x

i always thought of Wilbur as a fantastic writer and how the fuck did this guy MAKE SUCH A BAD STATEMENT that he got upstaged by DREAM??

This is one of the best things i've ever seen come from Dream. Words, actions, and intent, and to have someone who, for better or worse, has such a big platform support Shelby is just amazing to see.

[lilyminer]

Hey y’all, I was scrolling Twitter and I think what Puffy has to say on the topic is so important.

I’ve learned from irl experience that manipulative and/or abusive people do not just manipulate their direct victims. Wilbur put up a completely different online persona, he made his content feel safe. He surrounded himself with truly trustworthy people. To say we should’ve known better, or feel shame for being part of his community is not a productive or healthy mindset.

It’s not any of our fault. The only thing we can control is where our attention is drawn to in his absence. And my wholehearted suggestion is we give Shelby the love she deserves.

Source:

[brett-is-afraid]

Do you know anything but the Wilbur allegations? I just saw somethings on Twitter and Wilbur also responded

Yeah. So, here's a rundown of the situation so far for anyone who might've missed it or might not know. Each link is going to include a specific timestamp for what was said. TW for detailed abuse

Shubble went live (she begins talking about it at 3:38) and talked about abuse she had experienced from another creator. She talked about how her silence was "only keeping someone else's peace" so she opened up about it.

She specifically did not name any names and stated she was talking about it to help avoid someone else being in the same situation.

She says that in the beginning, he had expressed that he had a tendency to bite and that he'd made sure she was okay with that because he "didn't want her to come back later and say he abused her." And that she had agreed because he had never hurt her, but it had become more often that he bit too hard and hurt her. But that he always seemed, "genuinely sorry" and that they would develop a safeword.

She stated that he would bite her in front of others and that she would have to laugh it off because she was embarrassed.

She specifically talked about being bitten by him and that she had communicated that it was too hard, that she did not like it. She says she was met with him blaming it on her, saying it was her pain tolerance or that she was being dramatic. She states that he would later show off the bruises to their friends and joke that it looked like he abused her. She also states that he would poke at her bruises while they hurt.

She said she had asked him to stop and he said, "this is who he is and he wasn't going to change."

She said he also would constantly contradict himself and would fight her on it sometimes, telling her that he didn't do/say certain things.

She also said he would weaponize the safeword to make sure she was hurting, ignoring their safeword and biting harder for "just a second before letting go" or grinding his teeth down and smile after.

She said she'd express her anxiety to him and he would always reassure her.

She also said she believes he lovebombed her a lot at the beginning and that he'd make really huge romantic gestures. (Calling her his soulmate and writing love letters, etc.)

She stated she'd caught him in lies before, but it had always seemed like it was small things and she didn't address it. He then lied about big things and had been caught by his friends.

She said he insisted he didn't want to break up and expected her to have solutions, but he refused to compromise. And she said he would flaunt that he'd never prioritize her over anything.

He also allegedly stated that he would never prioritize her over anything that would give him more fame and money, admitting that he'd grown to resent her and that was the final push she needed to leave.

She said when they broke up, they'd agree to be friends and that he said he could never imagine not speaking to her again. And then he never talked to her except for when she needed things back. She also said he threw away hundreds of dollars worth of her things.

She said that once, he pinned her down and had her try to get away. When she couldn't, he made that point that he was stronger and she wouldn't be able to fight him back.

She also mentioned that he lived in a really filthy place and that she felt bad for him, believing that he just didn't know how to clean and needed someone to help him. She then states that she found out he had said that he didn't bother cleaning when she wasn't there because he would just wait for her to do it (which she only found out about after they broke up).

She said she did all the cleaning, laundry, paying for all the paper towels/soap. As well as food more than half the time.

She said she also paid for all the tickets and he never offered to pay after the very beginning. She said she also told him that she couldn't afford it and that he never traveled out to see her. He then agreed to pay for the cat sitter and did it once, and never again in the next months they dated.

Shubble never confirmed it was Wilbur, but Wilbur made a statement on it which can be found on his Twitter account.

He stated that allegations had come from an ex-girlfriend and while he claimed that he did not know he was abusing her, that he thought the behavior was consensual. He claimed he had messages that he believed proved it was, but chose not to publish them "out of respect for her."

He stated he was sharing his side to offer his perspective, but not to diminish or invalidate her.

He stated he recognized she felt her and that he wanted to apologize for it, that he had begun therapy and had made changes, committing himself to earning and maintaining trust from those around him.

[Image description in alt ids]

Neither have provided any visual proof or receipts to accompany their side of the story, despite Wilbur claiming to have it. Shubble has also not released any messages that may support her claims, although she never claimed to have them.

Other content creators have spoken about it.

Tubbo said he wanted to wait until Wilbur stated his side and that his response made him angry. He stated people might think he's biased for Wilbur, but they haven't spoken in private often. He also stated the response was "fucking vile" and that Wilbur made it about him. And that people in chat don't have any place in his chat if they're defending domestic abuse and he wants them to unfollow him. That he fully supports watching Shubble for more context.

Niki also spoke about it and stated,

"I see that people expect me to say something about the situation. Truth is that I was freshly 18 years old when I met him, while I did not see a problem with it back then I can now see how harmful he was to my young self and how damaged I am from that time. my time in the uk had some of the darkest moments of my life (and I think people can tell from the way I used to act on stream) I still can’t think too much about everything that happened back then without shaking and I don’t want to, I always felt so unheard whenever I brought up any situation regarding that time. I don’t want to say more as I don’t want to make this situation about myself."

Hannah also encouraged people to support Shubble and that she avoided unfollowing Wilbur at first because she didn't want to out who her abuser. But she has now unfollowed him.

Aimsey also stated Wilbur was not canceled, he was an abuser.

Badlinu also stated he had seen Wilbur be manipulative numerous times.

Billzo also added that he'd also seen Wilbur intimidate and manipulate his friends

As far as I'm aware, that's all that's happened as of now.

Sidenote: this is not an invitation for discourse or me trying to tell anyone how they should feel/react on said situation. This is just me trying to give an objective view of what's happened, please do not start discourse on this post/blog. As always, I will not publish any negativity about any creator as that is not what this blog is for.

[mysteriouswolf]

I'm going to start this off with saying it hurts. It fucking hurts. It hurts so, so much, and there's parts of me that still desperately want to look for a way out, to make him not the bad guy, but there isn't one.

Wilbur Soot is a fucking asshole. A piece of absolute trash, and it hurts. Because I've looked up to him for so many years now. He's been such an inspiration and comfort in my life, from dealing with issues I have myself, and giving me all the more reason to stay here. And now he's turned out to be like this. To anyone who's been following what I reblog about him, it's conflicting, because my thoughts seem to change by the minute. But I'm hoping in saying this I can clear my head and make a definite decision.

I will never be supporting Wilbur ever again. No matter how much better he gets, I don't care. What he did was unexcusable, and if you think otherwise, you can fuck off of my blog. His "apology" wasn't an apology, and for the most part all he did was defend himself. The responses from other content creators have pushed me to agree that yes, fuck Wilbur. He's an ass. I think I've stated this a couple times.

What he did to them, especially Niki and Tommy was inexcusable as well from what we know, and since Tommy is going on tour in about a week (if he's still going/up to it) PLEASE no one harass him with questions, or how he feels. Please, just leave him alone. I'm sure it's a lot to process for him too- even more than us.

I've seen some posts saying how we should be angry at other content creators for not speaking out sooner, but some of them have hinted at it/tried. And others haven't known enough, or didn't want to start causing something against him. The same reason Shelby didn't want to say his name. Maybe they couldn't. Please leave them alone.

The last thing I would like to say, is maybe controversial. If you disagree with me, I don't care, this is purely my opinion.

You can still enjoy his character. Your stories, your artwork, all that you've done with it. Don't feel bad about keeping it up, because that's yours now. You've worked so hard on it, and cared for that character so much that it's become far more yours than his. In regards to his music, I know his songs have provided a lot of us with comfort, including me. It's going to be really hard for me to stop listening to something I loved, but I'm going to make the effort- especially with his solo albums. Also, please don't harass the other members of Lovejoy. From what we know, they're lovely people, and if you're going to stop listening to them, great, do that, but don't harass them. Please. And if you do choose to listen to them, there's ways you can listen to music without supporting him- in my opinion covers are the best way to do that, but that one is up to you.

To wrap this up, I'd just like to say...please don't send death threats, or threats in general to anyone involved in this situation- including Wilbur. Leave them alone. Please.

This is subject to change if we get more information, but for now and the foreseeable future, this is my stance. I wish everyone hugs and comfort. This sucks. I'm sorry.

[dejwrld]

a black mom lost her 11 year old son that was protecting her from her abuser she dated over a decade ago (which a judge denied her protection order 3 weeks prior to this tragic event), another young girl was shot in the head and killed by her abusive ex boyfriend whom she tried to leave the day prior but he damaged her car, & 19 year old was fatally stabbed (and died) alongside her twin sister (who survived the attack) after rejecting a boy’s advances outside of a bodega. ladies please be safe out here. these men and boys (because there has been an increase of incel behavior in teenage boys also) are unhinged. they will rather take you out of this world than deal with their own emotions of rejection.

we shouldn’t live in a world where as women we have to give out fake google numbers and fake instagram pages just because we don’t know if a man/boy is having a decent day enough to not kill or harm us because we rejected them.

so please be safe out here once again.

[very-uncorrect]

What if there's a bunch of things that happened to Tails when he was a baby that he hasn't even told Sonic about, injuries that he's gotten that only he himself knows about, near death experiences that he went through as a toddler that he's never mentioned because he doesn't want anyone to waste their time worrying about him and he also might be ashamed because he doesn't want them to think he's weak, plus he also might not even realise how horrible the things that happened to him are because they're all he knew from a young age

But one time he casually mentions one of them by accident without even realising what he's said and then looks around at everyone in the room, confused as to why they look so horrified

[karda]

gentle reminder that if situations like these are affecting you mentally and you genuinely feel like your world is ending, you need to take a step back. parasocial relationships can be so dangerous for your well-being.

17yo me would be having a mental breakdown right now over this, and it took a while for me to realize that was a problem. its ok to be upset, but content creators are not your friends, and you don't know them. you can't let them have that kind of control over your mental health.

[crumb-updates]

crumb has responded to wilbur

[silamander]

Wilburs "apology" is incredibly disheartening. It honestly feels more like he's trying to excuse and justify his behavior instead of actually apologizing for it, and making it about himself. And he only focuses on the biting instead of all the other shit he did to Shelby, like oh, I don't know, maybe the FUCKING EMOTIONAL ABUSE. Wilbur playing it off as a joke just goes to show why abuse goes unnoticed. I think I speak for most of us when I say that it just feels icky now knowing I've been supporting a self-centered abuser for all these years.

And to anyone out there who's downplaying or justifying his behavior, discrediting everything Shelby's gone through, just so they feel better about watching his content and supporting him can kindly go fuck themselves. Just watch someone else or listen to a different song, it's not that fucking hard. I guess it just goes to show we don't ever really know these CC's.

My heart goes out to Shelby, and I can only hope she's doing okay now after this. I have so much respect for her for being brave enough to finally speak up about her experiences. She's created an open space for everyone to talk about their experiences, mad respect for that. If you relate to Shelby's experience, talk to someone. Friends, family, a therapist, anyone. DON'T stay silent about it, that only makes things worse. Take care of yourselves, and be safe.

[blissfali]

I’ve been thinking a lot about Lexi’s stream from yesterday and I just wanted to share my thoughts:

Hearing all the lies Wilbur has told has really like. Well I knew it was bad obviously I knew he was a BAD guy, but hearing the like. Genuine “Women aren’t funny”, just really got me thinking about how much of the platform he built was a lie.

It really hurts because you think of all his songs about all these things that connected with a lot of people, but if he can put on this role of. Actually caring about women’s issues. And it all have been a complete lie, what else has he straight up put on a facade about?

I understand that there is a difference between people and internet personas, but you have to admit that the lengths he went to are beyond normal. An internet persona is usually just more put together, more energetic, etc. It’s not straight up lying about your opinions in order to please your audience. Like that’s insanely shitty and weird.

Call me parasocial for this but it genuinely makes you wonder how far he went. All of it. I don’t know how to articulate this I might be being too vague. It just makes me think if he was willing to foster this community on safety that he didn’t believe in like… why? For the fame and money? Like is it not just easier to believe those opinions instead of just PRETENDING? How do you go so far lying on being on someone’s side just to say it’s all fake 😭Like at what point is it necessary to truly convince yourself of those things.

And again I understand it’s very easy to lie on the internet about you are. I know that. But just like… the sheer SCALE of it.

He’s always came across as pretty humble on and off of stream, so to hear that he was basically doing it all for the sake of getting money and fame and not a genuine care for creation it just. That fucks you up. I haven’t put as much money into him as other people have and I’m grateful but also. I know if I had had the means to that I would’ve. Why would you manipulate people like that, y’know? It’s just. insane to me.

You play this character on an SMP about someone whose struggling with mental health and suicide, and you turn around and abuse your partner, and you lie to your entire audience, and you hurt others in your life. At what point does it just become too much effort to lie to people like that? Why put up this elaborate facade?

I think I’m going in circles now 😭I just want to know if anyone else feels like this.

[stuffthatsrandomish]

Tw: Abuse