#warhammer. specifically about the messaging

[chaoticbardlady99]

Yesterday I Felt like Dancing (Astarion x GN! Reader)

Synopsis: You have burnt both ends of the candle and haven’t been taking care of your mental health. Unable to get yourself out of bed, Astarion begins to worry about you…

Author note- I have been hardcore struggling with my mental health lately and writing my silly little fics has been the only thing pulling me along. I thought it might be therapeutic to write about my current feelings (I have ADHD, MDD, and GAD so it’s a party up in here). I hope you enjoy!

CW- Suicidal Ideation, symptoms of depression, brief outburst, mentions of mental health diagnosis and poor medical advice.

Title inspired by song “Into the Walls” by Griff.

*not my pic, could not tell you where I found it so I apologize in advance. If you think it might be your picture, please message me so I can give proper credit.

Your last day before backtracking from the Mountain Pass to the Goblin camp is a difficult one.

Not for the group as a whole- just you specifically.

Days before a Mindflayer kidnapped you, a healer back home had told you your brain was sick. You had been devastated- resigned to your miserable fate.

You had been struggling for years at that point with inconsistent motivation, exhaustion, nightmares, and irrational thoughts for months. You have been functional for the most part, but then an overpowering wave will hit you like Warhammer in the ribs and you are rendered useless until it passes.

The healer suggested sunlight, exercise, eating healthy, and spending time with friends to help your affliction when you hit rock bottom. You were wildly unimpressed with her. At the time, you preferred to self isolate so you stayed by yourself in the woods trying to find peace there. You would have to let her know that her “going out and enjoying the sun” message is not always wise- you may get a tadpole shoved in your head. You can’t be that mad though- the tadpole helped bring your pep back.

Anyway, you have been doing all of that for weeks now, you even felt great, but today? You could not have hit rock bottom harder even if you tried.

You woke up that morning unable to get yourself out of bed. It was a rest day so it wasn’t a big deal, but you also know that your companions are going to have things they need to talk to you about and favors they need you to take care of.

Gods you had tried to get up. You are grateful that your past self had the gumption to wash off and change into clean clothes last night, but your armor is still disgustingly sitting outside your tent and your hair is long and wild. You had wanted to braid it, but it all felt like too much work.

Everything feels like too much work right now- even staying awake- so you drift in and out of uncomfortable naps throughout the morning. No matter how many times you fall asleep, begging for relief from the painful brick wall sitting on your brain, it never leaves.

You can feel the midday breeze rustle your tent. You’ve been laying here for hours now. You are crying and you honestly aren’t sure why. You feel completely paralyzed by all the things you need to do to be ready for the Underdark.

You need to clean your armor, go over the Goblin Camp’s map with Wyll, find Gale a magical artifact, and probably comfort Lae’zel since she’s been branded a heretic- but you won’t. The shame and self loathing continues. You are a silly, worthless little human being.

Every person who knocks on your tent gets a simple, “I’m just not feeling well,” and then they walk away. You don’t know why it makes you more sad than appreciative. If you were in their shoes- you would be bending over backwards to make sure they had everything they needed and you wouldn’t let them feel alone. Then you resent yourself for feeling that way towards your companions- they don’t owe you anything and you were the one who chose to help them- you didn’t ask for anything in return. This is all your fault.

The only person who hadn’t come to visit you was Astarion- which hurt your heart just a little, enough that the numbness coursing thickly through your body wavered for a moment. You are quite smitten and he is obviously not. Another mistake to add to the swirling black hole your mind has fallen into.

You knew it was stupid to want his comfort and affections- you had merely slept together a little less than a week ago. Astarion has been quasi avoiding you ever since and when he does talk to you- he’s awkward. You constantly look for flying pigs- Astarion feeling awkward or being awkward is unheard of.

You have come to accept that you were just some tryst and obviously he hadn’t enjoyed it as much as he said he did.

Astarion isn’t to blame and the situation itself certainly didn’t contribute to the sudden lack of emotions. You knew that you were on the verge of a mental collapse sooner rather than later, but you had foolishly hoped you wouldn’t be alone through it. It feels less all consuming when you try to find a reason. It’s more comfortable to know than it is to give up and say, “my brain is fucked and there isn’t a damn thing I can do so I guess I’m stuck here.”

You are jolted out of your thoughts by another knock on your tent.

“I’m sick,” you say flatly.

“Ha- you act like that will deter me. I can’t even get sick, Darling.”

Before you even have time to register that Astarion is on the other side of your tent- he pushes his way through the flaps and stares down at you in confusion. And… concern?

Astarion steps inside and kneels down next to you- scanning you for evidence of illness or injury.

“I suppose I had been worried for nothing,” he smiles sweetly at you, “you are totally fine. Come on Darling, you have to get up and eat. Wyll is fumbling with that map.”

You look at him and begin to cry. Astarion’s face lights up with alarm.

“What- what did I do!?”

“Please don’t make me,” you sob, “I just want a break. I’m so tired. I want to lay in this bed forever and never leave, but there is so much to do and it’s paralyzing.”

You continue to cry and you cover yourself with the extra blanket- successfully hiding your face.

“Go away,” you whisper, “I need to be left alone.”

You say it, but you are far from meaning it. You want him to stay- to hold you- but he doesn’t want you so it will only make everything hurt worse once the numbness fades away.

You wait for several moments and then you hear him leave. Your silent cry turns into choked sobs and your body is shaking from the pain you are in. The numbness hurts. The numbness tells you that you shouldn’t be alive.

Maybe you shouldn’t be.

Everyone here would be able to figure it out on their own (eventually) and you would finally be free. Free of your uncomfortable brain, free of your ugly body- free of the expectations of others. You would no longer be holding them back like you are today- like you will again in the future.

You are sure they would temporarily grieve you, but that was the deal with this whole journey. You had all accepted that one of you or all of you could die at any moment. You will just put them in more danger by being here…

You shake the thought from your head, violently- your head is pounding from the growing tension headache and dehydration. The tears eventually stop and you just… well, lay in bed again. You stare blankly at a book over in the corner. You keep trying to convince yourself to get up and read the damn thing- do literally ANYTHING else than just stay here in your bedroll.

Instead, you fall asleep.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

You wake up to someone knocking on your tent post. You grumble incoherently, covering your head and you hear your unexpected guest sit down next to you. The smell of food fills the tent and your stomach grumbles.

“You need to eat, my Dear,” Astarion says softly.

You are stunned to hear his voice grace your ears. You slowly pull the blanket down to just below your eyes and look at him. Astarion looks distressed, like he doesn’t want to be here. Why would he? You’re a nuisance.

You sit up gingerly and grab the bowl from him. You manage to give him a lopsided smile.

“Thanks. You don’t need to stay, I will be fine on my own,” you say apathetically, staring into the broth.

“I want to stay,” he says, “if you’ll have me.”

The expression on his face is unreadable, but he seems genuine. You nod, your lips pressed together tightly. You eat as much as you feel like while Astarion studies you.

Usually your anxiety is at an all time high (in maybe one of the better ways) when you are around Astarion- he gives you butterflies, butterflies, and even more butterflies. Usually your heart is racing in his presence, but right now you just feel empty.

“Where is your hairbrush?” Astarion asks.

You frown with confusion, “it’s in my bag, why?”

Astarion gets up and goes over to the bag- digging out a few items. He pulls out a lantern, your hairbrush, and a hair tie. Astarion comes over to you and sits down behind you. You feel him gather up the stray pieces of your hair and get to work.

Astarion runs his fingers through your scalp and your tangled hair- the feeling is soothing and it opens something inside of you. Your body shakes silently with sobs and you feel the worm behind your eyes wiggle as Astarion asks for access. You aren’t sure.

“I want to understand,” Astarion says, “please.”

His voice is so raw and desperate- you swallow thickly before allowing him to explore your current emotional state. The silence in the tent is palpable and you feel tense, uncomfortable even. No one has ever cared for you while you are in this state before.

You feel him continue his hairbrushing after he exits your mind. Astarion leaves soft kisses on your shoulder as he gently pulls apart every knot. It helps- you realize- to feel cared for. The numbness still hurts, you still hurt, but it’s nice to not feel so alone.

After Astarion is done brushing your hair, you feel his delicate fingers begin to intricately braid your hair. You wonder when he learned how to do hair.

“Leon’s daughter, Victoria, used to ask me to braid her hair all the time,” Astarion says in a bittersweet voice as if reading your mind, “I picked it up so that she would stop bugging me about it. She said and I quote, ‘you have the perfect braiding hands!’”

You smile to yourself tenderly, “That’s very kind of you, Star. I am sure she appreciated it as much as I appreciate it now.”

You feel Astarion’s hands falter at your words and you are unsure if you have upset him or not. A pregnant pause occurs before Astarion finally clears his throat and goes back to braiding your hair.

“I’m glad that I can help,” Astarion’s delicate, vulnerable words hang in the air, “I’ve… been worried about you today.”

You feel positively flustered and bad for making him feel that way.

“Oh you don’t need to worry about silly ole me! This happens sometimes” you make your voice chirpier than it needs to be, “This is actually the longest I’ve gone for a long time without this happening. I have theorized that the tadpole might help which is kinda cool- I think?”

You laugh awkwardly- desperate to ease his worry.

“How often does this happen?”

Shit. That was the winning question wasn’t it? Astarion will surely never see you as anything less than broken now.

“I’m not really sure,” your voice comes out in a whisper, “I usually always feel a bit of it all the time, but it’s manageable. I function very well regardless.”

“But this one isn’t manageable and evidently you aren’t functional right now.”

You sigh, “No, it isn’t and no, I’m not.”

“What changed?”

“Nothing,” you say, maybe too harshly, “that’s the part that drives me crazy. Yesterday was incredible- I was on top of the whole world, felt like dancing and screaming from the rooftops, but today!?”

You inhale and hold back the muted scream that wants to fill the air.

“Today,” you hiss, “I don’t even want to deal with any of this shit anymore. I’m so fucking tired. There is too much to fucking do and too many people depending on me. Then everyone gets irritated with me if I ask to push off their problems so I persevere through it despite knowing I’m getting bad again. I’m a giant stinking trash heap that everyone keeps adding more to.”

Astarion finishes braiding your hair and presses your back to his chest, pulling you into him. He puts his arms around your waist and settles his chin and face in between the crook of your neck.

“I just feel like such a nuisance all the time- no matter how hard I push myself to prove I’m not. Sometimes I think everyone would be better off if I just… went away.”

You both sit there quietly. At some point he had taken one of your hands in his and he was tracing shapes into the back of it with his thumb. Your omission still hangs heavily in the air.

“I wouldn’t be better off,” Astarion says hotly, “I’d be stuck with all these weirdos by myself. That would be truly miserable, Darling.”

You shake your head, a half smile on your face.

“And besides- you are not even close to a nuisance,” Astarion states, leaving a kiss on your cheek, “at least you aren’t in constant need of magical objects to eat or blood to drink. Oh and you don’t require a painstaking amount of searching to prevent you from literally burning everyone alive.

“Oh and did I forget to mention, we have not one, but two women who despise each other and follow hateful Goddesses which was a fun choice for whatever sick bastard twisted our fates this way.”

You laugh breathily, closing your eyes and letting the sound defrost some of your insides.

“What I’m saying is- I think you are the least of everyone’s ‘nuisances’, my Darling,” he says, squeezing you tighter to his chest, “despite how little you think of yourself. We ne- no, I want you to stay. I know everyone else would say the same, but I must emphasize that I would be horribly distraught if you disappeared. Hells I’d even pay to have you resurrected.”

You gasp playfully, your voice falling slightly flat, “You? The most frugal man I have ever met would pay 200 gold coins to ‘Strike thy name from the record’?”

Your impression of Withers gets Astarion to genuinely laugh- the sound vibrating in your chest. You lean into him and he guides you back to laying down. Astarion entangles his legs with yours as he holds you tightly- your faces are mere centimeters apart. You love the way Astarion smells- rosemary, bergamot, and brandy. You wish you could be wrapped up in him forever. You are still in pain- everything still hurts and feels too difficult, but right now it feels a little less heavy.

“I would throw bags of Gold Coins at that corpse out of revenge, my Dear,” he teases, “you couldn’t possibly think I would ever let you rest peacefully in your grave- I would be far too angry with you and unhappy without you to let that happen.”

You lay there and despite yourself, you lean forward and leave butterfly kisses along his cheeks with your lashes. Astarion scrunches up his nose reflexively and smiles at you. You plant a sweet, short kiss on his lips.

“Thank you Astarion- for everything.”

You close your eyes as he traces circles along your lower back. Your eyes begin to droop, and you fall asleep.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

When you wake up the next morning- you are disappointed to find that you are all alone in your tent. The heavy numbness is still there and you sigh. At least last night made it more bearable.

You look on the side where Astarion had been sleeping and find a note with a bottle attached to it. You pick it up and begin to read.

Tav,

Astarion had asked me about herbs for some relief regarding mental discomforts. I unfortunately don’t know many, but this is a mixture of St. John’s Wort, Valerian Root, and Ashwagandha. Historically, I know these have been used to alleviate emotional and mental pain.

Astarion didn’t tell me why he was asking, but I deduced it was you pretty quickly when he began shooing everyone away from your tent this morning.

I hope this helps- we are all here if you need us. May Silvanus light your path as you navigate this difficult time.

-Halsin

You sit in your own stunned silence for what feels like hours. Halsin knows and he wants to help? Halsin doesn’t think you are screwed or a nuisance? The man barely even knows you!

You are a bit embarrassed, but you can’t help but laugh at the image of Astarion telling everyone to leave you alone.

You open the bottle and a pleasant, earthy smell fills the tent. You drink the mixture (that definitely does not taste anywhere near as pleasant as it smells) and you do feel a slight bit better. Your apathy feels even more tolerable now. You will have to thank Halsin.

You slowly rise from your tent and look around. Everything is packed up neatly in the corner- your clothes from the previous day are folded nicely and you notice all the holes are sewn up.

You jump when someone enters your tent abruptly- the midday sun warming your skin. You turn around and Astarion is smiling at you, but looks nervous.

“I cleaned off your armor and your weapons,” he says awkwardly, scratching the back of his head, “I also packed up your stuff- as you can see. We have to start leaving unfortunately, but I’ll help you get on your armor like I usually do- I might still need help with mine though, but I can ask someone else if it’s too much for you right now. Lae’zel and Karlach offered to pack up your tent. Wyll and Shadowheart figured out the map- Wyll is going to be our ‘fearless’ leader for the day. Gale has some food for you to snack on while we travel- which you will be eating, by the way.”

Astarion is looking at you with a vulnerable expression on his face. He plays nervously with the gold coin in his hands.

You can hardly believe what you are hearing.

“Did- did you do all this for me?” You say with disbelief.

You never thought Astarion was capable of smiling shyly until he had admitted to you that you had been his first thinking creature- you certainly never thought you’d see him become shy twice in your presence.

“I did and it wasn’t a nuisance so don’t even begin to worry about that,” He walks over to you, gently cradling your face in his hands, “I hope this is all okay.”

You smile- the first genuine feeling of happiness you’ve felt in the last 24 hours gently sparks in your chest as you stare up at him. You get up on your tiptoes and bridge the gap between your lips.

“Thank you Astarion, this is perfect- you are perfect,” you are crying tears of joy, “this is the kindest gesture anyone has ever made for me. So just, thank you.”

“Of course, Darling,” he says smiling in between kisses, “I won’t let you lose to yourself. We’ll get through this together from now on- no more hiding.”

And for once? You actually believe someone.

-if you guys like this, please let me know if you would want a part two written from Astarion’s perspective.

Update- I did the thing you silly geese

https://www.tumblr.com/chaoticbardlady99/735969926279528448/i-took-all-this-love-i-found-and-i-hope-that-its

Tag-list: @spacebarbarianweird @domainoflostsouls

[moodymisty]

Hello🌻I hope you are doing well✨ Do you write in Warhammer? I saw this in the list of fandoms, but if not, I apologize a thousand😅 So, Sanguinius/reader-eternal. A moment of rest. Suppose there was some kind of difficult battle, and returning to his chambers after a victorious battle, Sanguinius feels tired and empty, he is dirty from blood and dirt, his hair is tangled, his wings have also lost their whiteness. And so he enters his chambers and smells a pleasant, but unfamiliar smell. The reader, anticipating in what state he would return, prepared a bath and took out her personal bathroom things (gels, shampoos, salts, candles, perfumes - with such smells that no one in the Imperium had seen since the Dark Era) and even more valuable to her (let it be a gift from parents or something) some kind of music player. Well, the reader comforts Angel, turns on music from his youth (maybe Beethoven, Wagner, Tchaikovsky or whatever you like best)), bathes him, takes care of his hair, nails and all that. How you can make his wings comfortable, I can’t imagine🤔 but in general, the reader was able to wash them somehow) Tells stories of plants, fruits, and animals that no primarch could ever see. About your favorite music, some kind of warm memory. Well, something like that😅 sorry if this is too long. In general, you can change the conditions to suit your comfort❤

Author's Note: So I was actually thinking of something somewhat similar to write in my own time because I'm a lonely primarch/astartes fucker for Guilliman (or pre-heresy Lorgar but that's just my 'I can fix him' mental illness talking) So when you sent this in I just about ascended. Emperor save my heretical ass for making this way too fluffy for Warhammer.

Relationships: Sanguinius/Fem!Reader

Warnings: It's 40k lol so references to war and all sorts of violence but other than that, just fluff. Also the slightest hint at the BA astartes being a bit platonic yandere for their Primarch's beloved because it's my headcanon. Enjoy petting the pigeon primarch y'all

For someone as primped and perfect as Sanguinius- A beautiful angel with not a hair out of place or word said without the most careful of consideration, his personal quarters are an absolute mess.

Feathers of all sizes lay scattered across the floor and the giant bed that adorns the massive room, its blankets strewn about and slept in multiple times without being made up in-between. In all of it’s disheveled look, it looks comfortable to say the least.

It's not as if you actually mind the mess, it's not bad enough to even really call it one, but it's simply amusing to think of someone as borderline ethereal as Sanguinius sleeping in a messy, wrinkled bed adorned with his own down.

The Blood Angel guards posted in the hall had allowed you to pass into his quarters without fuss, one of many privileges that you're still getting used to. They nodded towards you and spoke with that Astartes specific rigid but technically polite prose; Seeped in a level of respect you don't feel entirely deserving of.

Sanguinius' angelic sons are, intense. Any other word you think of is too negative in it's definition, or doesn't accurately describe this feeling of heavy downward pressure on your body you get whenever you are close to them. They have a protective quality that has only seemed to intensify the closer you've gotten to their genefather, as you can feel eyes on your back until the door closes behind you and the guards only then return to their vigilant watch of the palace halls.

Sometimes, you swear they're following you.

A pondering for another time perhaps, as you look around the messy quarters holding your things in your hands.

Sanguinius is due to return to Terra at any moment now, and after so long with only vox messages and handwritten letters, you've decided to attempt to surprise him. You probably won't be able to do so, but you can at least prepare him something that will hopefully brighten up his spirits. You can tell from his slip ups in tone that some things have been grating on him like waves on a cliffside.

You'll do anything to make sure that the Angel, your Angel, never looses that glow that seems to follow him; And perhaps steal some of those rare snippets of time to have him just to yourself. Even if only for a moment.

In the separate room that serves as his private bath you begin to run hot water, billows of steam quickly rising to the ceiling and covering the metal adornments around the room with dew. It pours out the open door, as you sit your bag on the edge and pull out various different things. Some sourced from other planets, one from your father who all but fainted upon your asking of it for a Primarch, all being hard to obtain; Little bundles of rare luxury. You fully intend to make use of them all. They smell like flowers and sea salt, far better than the scent of the iron and filth-covered armor aboard the Red Tear.

Though your ears prick to the sound of heavy footsteps before you can fully finish setting up, and you lean up and away from the massive bath and leave the room only just as Sanguinius himself enters. In saying any moment, you seem to have been perfectly accurate.

The first thing you notice of him, besides your joy of seeing him, is he has primary feathers that are bent and sticking out away from the natural pattern of his wings, a few even cracked and torn. He's already gone though the necessary process to remove his armor, and now he's clad in the usual and more comfortable garb he would wear when originally on Baal.

While Sanguinius himself is unharmed, not a single wound and the blood dried on himself not his own, he still is disheveled and messy; Hair tangled from being blown in the wind and getting caught in the raised collar of his armor. You can see mud staining the tips of his wings where it splattered upward, unable to fully protect them from whatever muck he came in contact with.

"I know,"

He sees the look on your face, and his gentle stoicism parts ever so slightly as his lips part. His eyes show the glint of irritation through his long lashes as he looks slightly downward and to the side with a furrowed brow.

"I look a mess. there is no need to point it out. Believe me when I tell you someone else has already done so." He normally wouldn't be fond of something laughing at his current condition, but he supposes he can find the entertainment in it. It's an easier thing to swallow when it's his little beloved doing so. The sound of your quiet, breathily laugh is soothing more than aggravating, and he enjoys the look of sweet mirth plastered on your face. While it may be somewhat at his expense, he doesn't mind all too much considering.

"Well, then you might like the surprise I made up for you even more." His lips crook upward in the most gentle of smirks; Though he was more than likely instantly cued into your gift by the feeling of steam wafting from the other room into this one.

"If not just to get all the dirt from your wings."

At the mere mention of it you watch his wings stretch, shaking slightly as he attempts to right feathers stuck out of alignment. He reaches for the front of his robes as he walks towards the bath.

"I hope you didn't prepare all of this only for me to enjoy it alone. I'd find myself dreadfully bored without any company." You shake your head, following the angel into the bath while he quickly begins to slip into the hot water. You move in not long after, the water almost too hot on your skin, but the feeling of the steam on your face is pleasant.

He attempts to stretch his wings; Though not many rooms can handle his wings fully unfurled. The main room of his quarters when his bed resides can, but in here he finds the tips of his primary flight feathers brushing against the wall. When you attempt to move closer, he furls his wings back up to avoid you bumping them. It lets you reach close enough to his hair, where you wet it with the hot water and watch his eyes gently close. You watch as his hair slowly becomes clean even after so long, golden sheen returning as the soot washes away.

"I have been so besieged by the smell of crude oils and sweat as of late, I swear I'd forgotten what flowers smelled like..."

He smiles when the sound of your quiet, breathy laugh hits his ears, though you still continue treating him. He might have normally apposed to such obnoxious pampering, but you seem to enjoy it, and he’ll partake in a moment of selfishness.

“Let me enjoy this moment without your mockery, will you?” Your fingers weave into his golden hair, just a bit wavy even with the water weighing it down.

"Terribly sorry, Lord Primarch." How he hates that stuffy title; His nose wrinkles. When you notice his doing so, you laugh again.

"It's the title my father used when I told him I needed some of these things." His eyes open to watch you for a moment.

"They're made of flowers from my home planet; When I said they were for The Angel Sanguinius, I swear he choked on his own spit then and there. Thought I had finally killed him."

He listens to you mumble about their origin for a short while, if for nothing more than to fill the silence. The water is no longer running, so other than the occasional splash of water the room is near silent.

You feel the brush of his feathers against your bare skin as they adjust, the water turning color as the grime slips from them and they return to their pristine white color. After all this time he finally feels clean, such a luxury he's been unable to indulge in for quite some time. Perhaps he’s odd in that regard, hating it far more than some of his fellow Primarchs.

He feels you ever so gently brush along a feather to align it with the others, fingers gentle like touching the thinnest glass. His eyes are still closed while you do so. Your gentleness of it isn’t lost on him, as he feels lips against the corner of his mouth.

A rare moment of peace; He'll indulge in it while he has the chance.

[danistotallyuncool]

frustrations under the cut please feel free to ignore.

It's now setting in that all the friend group drama I've gone through in the past 2 months started with warhammer 40k, but it wasn't actually about 40k. But it nonetheless effected my enjoyment of the hobby due to the association of said drama. And that sucks.

something that went from a slight disagreement regarding game rules unraveled a 8 year friendship because one person just couldn't accept the fact that he has historically treated his friends badly, and we were trying to get him to get a grip and not be a sore winner. but it dug up the fact that he was mad at me for not choosing him to be my best man, he tried to discourage me from going back to school, and multiple stupid arguments where he was in the wrong and would just die on his stupid hills.

He called me a liar to my face for not pointing out his behavior in public when I knew that he escalates arguments to the point of yelling, and I am bad with confrontation, even worse if it's in public.

he did this all in public, in front of my friends, as well as employees of the store we were at and their customers.

we all had an in person group discussion on table etiquette where i established this boundary, only for 1 week later to have that boundry crossed, and when my wife was explaining the fight, flight, freeze trauma response, to which my wife tried to elaborate on them still calling me a liar when i freeze to avoid confrontation and compared it to victims of sexual assault also freezing in those situations. to which this player *laughed* knowing damn well my wife is a SA victim.

This was a point I should have fucking hit him. I wanted to so bad. I didn't want to catch a charge though, so the best I could do is ask, "what's so funny about that?"

him and his wife proceed to message EVERYONE in out friend group about this feud which as far I was concerned, did not involve anyone else at that point. They sent everyone, including me a book about how we are trying to kick them out of the friend group, which was not true. I in turn began to write a long worded response that became a 14 page word document but chose not to send it and let them keep showing their asses. When some people came over to my home to paint and play warhammer, this couple promptly uninvited us from all future plans as this was seen as "taking sides" and forced this fight onto people who asked to stay out of it, one of which is someone going through the death of a pet and a divorce.

This was my final straw. this all happened at the beginning of the month. And the remaining players have a separate chat. But we all know the elephant in the room and to me feels like there is more unspoken awkwardness.

All this couple had to do was take the L, say sorry, and change their behavior. but they didn't. they let it all fall apart because they were too fucking egotistical to admit they were in the wrong and they caused people I like to hang out with to ghost the main group chat.

I know these people only have their side of the story, and I haven't tried to write to the others to defend myself or Ren because they specifically do not want to hear any more arguing, so I am trying to respect their boundaries.

I've been sitting on this for a while. And was hoping to fix it. But I see now that I can't and I gotta move on. The Hobby is still fun. But I don't enjoy it like I used to. and that sucks. It was the one fucking hobby that stuck for me and now it's tarnished. I don't know man. I just needed to vent. All I wanted to do was to build and paint little dudes with my friends and play a stupid badly worded game from the UK. and they fucked it all up.

[quietbluejay]

Wolfsbane 2

mechanicum time there's a debate about whether or not normal human form is Bad or not

oh! Cawl! and I've heard of Qvo (what a name) they're arguing about it specifically w.r.t. their boss lol

they ship of theseus'd my boss can't have shit on trisolan

ah, friendship but no this is genuine friendship lmao

eesh

in the narration cawl notes that it's because he got it asap instead of waiting to afford better medical treatment or a better implant they continue to debate the topic and I begin to wonder if it's going to be a theme

looks like someone plagiarized lol Qvo's next argument is that the astartes, custodes, and primarchs were all created by the Emperor as a means to an end

honestly this is a very fun argument it reads more as a theological discussion between two priests than anything else

good way of showing what the Mechanicum is like like the next bit is about the schism and who is the true Pope since the King of France moved him to Avignon

errr I mean since there's a new Fabricator-General on Terra like swap out the names and you could have a couple of benedictines having this discussion i would say jesuits or dominicans but both of those were a few hundred years after the Avignon papacy one must maintain historical accuracy when one makes these jokes

like look at this also "he's not the Omnissiah, he's a very naughty boy"

Cawl asks Qvo if his implant has really improved his quality of life qvo: well i can, er, see in the dark now

oh no Cawl is my mother

honestly it feels like the argument about who is really the pope is less important and what could really get you into trouble is spreading heresy which again, tracks back to their boss cawl: what has she gained anyways? nothing qvo: nothing except a 500 year lifespan qvo: and control of all the military assets of [place]

i don't know much about cawl but i know enough to know this is dramatic irony qvo accuses cawl of being obsessed with astartes

cawl: we're the mechanicum, er, mechanicus, whatever, we're all obsessed with something here

once again, more details that make this book feel the most scifi of anything Haley has written

oh, Cawl is naming the servitors, which bothers Qvo he's named this one Tez-Lar after Tesla why do I have a feeling that Haley may be one of those people with strong feelings about Edison and Tesla

anyways great conversation, very fun, very realistic I will once again forgive Haley a writing sin (headhopping this time) which he occasionally commits mainly because it was pretty subtle

i feel like i'm going to get at least one new favourite character out of this book and it's probably gonna be cawl time for description of cawl's workroom and again this sounds like a monastery Cawl built Tez-Lar from scavenged parts

technically Cawl is a graverobber w.r.t. Tez-Lar's biological parts

i want to see what happens if he were to team up with Mr. Love And Explosions on Planet Medusa i don't remember his name the mad engineer iron hand dude so cawl keeps switching specializations to try and learn everything which is starting to get noticed oops

i feel like this is also some kind of dramatic irony

AU where cawl gets an infection and keels over anyways he successfully added more RAM to his augments onwards! SCIENCE awaits! that'd be a fun crossover. stick him in Academy City

or Fate why are so many warhammer characters great fits for Nasuverse?

tonight: Russ pores over blueprints of the Vengeful Spirit with his emotional support wolves

that's one take anyways russ is enjoying the mental challenge of planning this out no jokes please (no please go ahead lmao) a message for Russ! sanguinius is back so there's going to be a brotherly council and Russ anticipates Problems

there was also some stuff about propagandists painting out all the damage to the ships im tucking this away to be considered upon later sanguinius has had a rough trip He gets greeted by Malcador, Dorn, and Jaghatai before a cheering crowd Sanguinius: uh, so where's dad Malcador: your father wants you to know he's overjoyed you're back Sanguinius: where is he

that's the most anyone has said about it in all the books i've read so far

pfffffft sanguinius wonders if it's dangerous to mislead people with all these celebrations and propaganda

so time for sanguinius to tell his story he leaves out…certain details re: the temptations of Chaos and also the entire existence of Imperium Secundus innteresting he would have told the Emperor all of it, "unburdened himself" but not his brother or Malcador Malcador is trying to read Sanguinius' mind the whole time, how annoying Sanguinius summarizes Know No Fear, Betrayer, Unremembered Empire, Pharos, Angels of Caliban, and Ruinstorm very useful for people who didn't read those books but also i guess i've been spoiled now on some plot points okay time for strategy talk

yeah dorn isn't happy

nvm i was wrong dorn says sanguinius is right Russ: yeah we don't have TIME guys

huh that's a comparison i haven't seen before okay this discussion is the best strategy i've seen from any primarch to date i wouldn't call it superhuman by any means but at least it's something so they have a plan to pin down Horus at Beta-Garmon, they think it'll be heavy casualties but they'll win Russ: yeah. about that. i'm not going to be there

lmao

incredible Dorn straight up tells him he's acting like Magnus lmao Russ: Nikaea was a trick by the enemy to make us get rid of our librarians

didn't Leman…not actually speak at Nikaea? wasn't it just Ohthere from the SW? this is great russ: anyways me and jaghatai are different. rune priests and stormseers are just different because we have tradition

he is correct in this if nothing else

again this is very fun

russ: if you want me to do what you say so bad, then make dad tell me to do it

man i wish dorn had punched him. it would have been satisfying. for me. and also dorn.

[clonerightsagenda]

accidentally recreated the oldest and most tired FMA fandom joke on discord this evening

Kat Harrowhark is Hohenheim if he was a mentally ill teen lesbian

Gill Hm. Hmmmm. I get what you’re saying but the above messages were Certainly Something to read back to back when I got home just now

Kat lmao my apologies

Gill It’s just funny bc I’m like “wait why is Harrow like Hohenheim in the specific context of the above panel” before I Realized

Kat nah she is just a philosopher's stone made of the murder of her people Everyone talks about the HS and warhammer influences on TLT but I do feel like it has some FMA vibes particularly in that Hiromu Arakawa is perhaps too into deeply unbalanced codependent partners

Gill “Riza and Roy are little bit too much like a prototype necro/cav pair”, I thought, before remembering that there’s at least two or three other FMA duos that fit that bill also Ling and Lan Fan, Ed and Al themselves, Scar and Mei, also Izumi and her husband,

Kat Arakawa loves her brawler duo especially if one of them is sworn into service to the other and kind of insane about it Olivier and that dude with the mohawk Arakwa I only find this Romantic (capital r not necessarily lowercase) if they can quit their job

Gill Iirc (it’s been A Very Long While since I read the endgame chapters) isn’t Father’s master plan that turns him into a bishie not entirely unlike Cam and Pal’s soul gestalt gambit? Except with Cam and Pal it was more or less mutually consensual and God wasn’t involved,

Kat hm. he retained his own personality, he just slorped up souls for fuel. closer to John eating Alecto really no one really pulls a Paul although frankly given how everyone behaves in this story I'm honestly shocked no one give them ideas

Gill Gotta draw the line somewhere

Kat which fma characters would die fusing their souls together into some platonic ideal of their relationship that is also kind of a corruption arc bc it involves self destruction, a list tbh though everyone seems more keen on dying before the other person in their little battle couple

Gill Hmmmm You know if anyone was gonna do it I think it’d be Roy and Riza

Kat would Roy and Riza haha I was gonna say or is their self hatred THAT strong

Gill Is their mutual devotion/co-dependence stronger than their individual self-loathing? Find out next week on Fullmetal Alchemist: Locked Tomb Edition

Kat wait a second I cannot fucking believe this because she is always the punchline of FMA jokes but canonically the person who pulled a Paul non consensually was Nina always comes back to the fucking dog

Gill God damnit

[plague-doctor-on-tumbler]

I've had this account for over a year and it's been long enough that I should make one of these

ABOUT ME

Hello everyone, I'm plague-doctor-on-tumbler but since it's a mouthful you guys can call me Sham (obviously not my real name but a close amalgamation/english bastardization) or Kaenan (another name I use).

personal stuff I don't care if you guys know: my birthday is august 28, I'm Canadian, I'm pansexual, im a weird enbie/voidpunk thing, I have a cat (his name is Lionel)

Fandoms I'm in (this will be edited depending on if I gain/lose an interest): Calvin and Hobbes, Cosmere/Brandon Sanderson, Dungeons And Dragons, Fencing, Plague Doctors, Team Fortress 2, Warframe, Warhammer 40k.

For some specifications on my fandom factions:

Calvin and Hobbes: I like Hobbes more

Cosmere/Brandon Sanderson: Shadows of Self is my favorite book in the cosmere, if I was anything in the cosmere I'd want to be a feruchemist.

Dungeons and Dragons: most of my OCs come from here, I main Bardlock when I'm not DMing, I usually am the DM

Plague Doctors: Yes I have a mask and a basic costume.

Team Fortress 2: Medic/Spy main, I miss madcap, I still hope that comic 7 will come out one day

Warframe: completed base solar system, too scared of steel path to touch it with a ten-foot pole, perfer drifter over operator, keep switching my main currently it's Kullervo

Warhammer 40k: LET'S GO NECRONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!, i am a necron player (sorry if it was hard to tell), after necrons I like Alpha Legion (they are still loyalists), Kreigers are my little fanatic boys so they're third, got into warhammer 40k via a youtube video about flayed ones that popped onto my recommended.

If you guys want to private message me you can use my discord which is: morally_gay

That's it i guess, if I want to add more stuff I'll add it

[limbobilbo]

The big LimboBilbo bio pinned post because my bio is getting too big now (this will be very big)

Hello. I am LimboBilbo, you may call me Limbo or LimboBilbo.

I am cis. And I use both He/Him and They/Them pronouns.

I am pansexual, not bi, and not straight.

I am Australian, specifically Queensland.

Im in university, studying history and philosophy

I am a diagnosed adhd haver

A comprehensive list of things I am into:

JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure, Guilty Gear (I main goldlewis), general FGC games (mainly anime ones), Persona, mythology, history, Disco Elysium, Red Dead Redemption 2, House of Leaves, Eco’s Baudolino, Warhammer 40k, Fallout, Jujutsu Kaisen (I do not take part in the jjk fanbase and Ive only watched the anime so do not message me spoilers), too many ttrpgs, Scooby Doo, worldbuilding (which i do compulsively), deltarune, horrible histories, flight of the concords, the mighty boosh, monty python

I regularly run and play tabletop roleplaying games using multiple systems. I have been told I am good at GMing.

Im a very amateur writer and I’m working on a piece of serial original fiction inspired by shonen battle manga called Death & Taxes. Which you can read for free on AO3. It updates when I have time, and my friend proofreads my writing. https://archiveofourown.org/series/4095730

I came to tumblr during the 196 migration. I actually coined the term 196 campfire.

My asks are always open and I answer basically all questions I get.

personal tags I use:

#Da Gang which I use in regards to my gang. The da gang gang. You can read about that here: https://www.tumblr.com/limbobilbo/724506341552553984/da-gang

#LimboBilbo worldbuilding which I post my worldbuilding in.

#for my sapphic followers which I use to occasionally to reblog sapphic stuff

#The Burlap sack. This ones a secret.

#Good and Correct. This is just my way of tagging stuff i really like

Also

If you think China, North Korea or Russia are ‘based’ fuck off

[the-firebird69]

Warriors of the world - Warhammer 40k tribute

Did they say my life is over but it's not over yet and we're going to use it to attack these Max with a big mouse and a huge attitude and crack this nut. I'm going in full force we do appreciate his help and these TS frames are saving everybody just like one size and I'm making tons of them and people are making kids for them and we have engines that are brings and Stratton they're easy to make they're made fast and they go fast is Dad and he are geniuses and they're helping and they're doing what they can him from beyond the grave possibly intact and he does have an army and weaponry ready and that's Arnie and they worked on it and he's a rebel and we're going to help him out and he says I can help out motorcycle guys and to stop dragging ass around in the carpet and take care of it it's only a little bit not everybody and so I'm going to do that that's why he talks to me it's gross I do see what he's saying we can pump these out and we really have to and we're going to start now we have a huge number of them that we can be making and somebody walked by with a message from shack and it looks a little bit odd but it is true and it's about these jeans and it's a specific company and it's made for Shaq it's his company and they fit his particular gigantic posterior. And yes this little kid taught me to speak this way and you got it from Randall text Cobb who got it from Will and Bill and it's horrifying. He did lift the 1200 and we're getting it from some people they said that it was going around and Randall text Cobb had notes and those are grabbed by Mac Daddy after he left and he's got actual pictures of the kid lifting it I want those out and smack daddy says I can't do it you'll have to find the pictures or find Randall text Cobb so I'm going to assemble the teams and remotely if you really demand it and he said it's probably a better idea that they can send to Sergeant in there and I'm going to do that it's probably Clancy Brown but you know some people to bring and he wants Clancy to organize it rescue rangers to go after Randall text Cobb and he is pseudo empire he knows what to do means he wants to button it up

Trump

Olympus

[wh40ksummerfest]

40K Fanwork Exchange

Summer is coming and the future is grimdark!

But even on the battlefield, love can bloom... or hijinks can happen, friendships be made or broken, the most unlikely people meet from across 10,000 years of war-torn history...!

This summer exchange is a low-pressure Warhammer 40,000-themed fanworks exchange, running from mid-May to August 1st, 2022, and welcomes all character- and relationship-driven fanfiction and fanart featuring characters from Warhammer 40,000 and the Horus Heresy series.

Participants who sign up agree to write a story of no less than 500 words, or to create a piece of fan art that is at minimum clean, finished line art on unlined paper that can stand as a completed work, in exchange for receiving one story or one piece of fan art.

Nominate your favourite characters and pairings May 11-18! Sign up for the exchange May 19-26! Assignment due July 24.

Schedule:

May 11 - May 18: Nominations May 19 - May 26: Sign ups May 27: Matching and assignments go out July 18: Early default deadline July 24 11:59 ECT: Assignments due, pinch hits go out July 30: Pinch hits due July 31: Last minute scrambling and panic August 1 00:01 ECT: Works go live August 8 00:01 ECT: Archive closes and creators are revealed

Nomination Requirements:

Allowed: Characters from the Warhammer 40,000 franchise and the Horus Heresy series, including the tabletop codices and rpg rulebooks, Black Library novels, short stories and anthologies, computer games, Warhammer TV animated films, and fan-created content such as TTS; OCs are also welcome as long as they recognisably belong in the Warhammer 40,000 universe.

Not allowed: Characters from other fandoms.

Sign-Up Requirements

You must have an AO3 account to participate.

You will be able to request between 3 and 10 characters/relationships from the tag set. Please only request characters for whom you’d like to receive content. You must request three at the minimum. If no offers match your request, you will be contacted by the mod to see if you’d like to add requests to make you matchable.

You will be able to offer between 4 and 10 characters/relationships from the tag set. Please only offer characters and relationships for which you are willing to create fic. If nothing you offer matches any requests made, the mod will contact you to see if you can add offers to your sign-up.

There will be a section in sign-ups for optional details and letters (off-site blog posts, character art, etc.) if you have them. It is very helpful to give creators an idea of what you like.

Anything you Do Not Want (DNW) to receive in your gift must be included in the AO3 sign-up; DNWs listed in external letters but not on AO3 may slip through.

Assignments

You are only guaranteed to match on one character or relationship.

Please be judicious about where you chat about your assignment; your recipient may be sharing that space with you and this is an anonymous exchange for the first week. No spoilers please!

If your assignment doesn’t match your sign-up, please contact the mod as soon as possible.

Gift Requirements

Gift works must respect the recipients’ DNWs. If a DNW is included, the creator’s work will not be published and the creator will be removed from the exchange.

Completed assignments must be a fic of at least 500 words or a fanart of clean, finished line art on unlined paper created specifically for the recipient and must include at least one of their requested characters and/or relationships.

Posting

Fanworks must be posted on AO3 in the 40K Fanworks Exchange collection.

Fic entries with excessive spelling and grammar errors or art entries drawn on lined paper/badly scanned will be rejected. Contact the mods if you need help and they will put the word out.

Obviously, as this is an anon exchange, please don’t post your work (including snippets) elsewhere before reveals.

Pinch Hits

Pinch hits will be posted here.

If you’d like to claim a pinch hit, message the mod with your AO3 name.

Treats

Treats are welcome, but should fill a stated request for the recipient

Treats must also respect any Do Not Wants

There are no minimum requirements for treats (e.g. a fic of 300 words is acceptable)

Please tag all treats as “40K Fanwork Exchange Treat.“

Treats may go into the main collection.

Code of Behavior

Please acknowledge (ideally with a comment) your gift – even if you defaulted.

Default early if you know you will be unable to complete your assignment. The mod then doesn’t have to scramble for last minute pinch hitters.

If Shit Happens last minute, PM the mod asap or shoot an e-mail to 40Kfanworkexchange@gmail.com

This is supposed to be a fun low-key celebration of Warhammer 40,000 as a whole. This is not a place for kinkshaming, ship wars, militant moral policing, or general assholery. Thank you.

[absolutely-correct-amphibia]

Okay so my theory regarding the new episode and the urn and pink frog and the night will be under the cut for spoiler purposes.

Dr. Jan said that the way pink frog is presented on the urn is like "some kind of frog deity"

And I ask you: What if they are? What if pink frog did become some kind of deity after using the powers given to them by the calamity box often enough?

What do we know about the powers the calamity box gives you? We know they "don't feel good" according to Anne. We know they can physically transform you briefly while you use them. We know Anne couldn't use her arms for while.

So, I hereby raise you the possibility that both Pink Frog and Barrel the Toad used the powers given to them by the Calamity Box and over time, after using them much too often, became corrupted and physically transformed into another being.

What beings? Well, allow me to explain.

The message on the urn says "seek the mother of olms, she will guide you to your destiny"

I believe the mother of olms and The Night might be connected, possibly even the same thing, due to the way Marcy's mind control helmet is designed with the antenna's (similar to the olms in Quarreler's Pass). 'Sides, we don't really know what the Night is.

Why am I telling you this specifically? Well, I think Pink Frog, after using their powers in an unhealthy amount, might have turned into the Night. Anne's powers made her grow horns, who's to say Pink Frog didn't too? Why would the mother of olms be mentioned on an urn with Pink Frog?

As for Barrel, with this theory it could very well be that he's that giant snake that was guarding Barrel's Warhammer.

Pretty out there, I know, but I can dream, right? (And if the show confirms they aren't the same entity then I guess Pink Frog stole the Music Box, went to earth and just lived there with vikings)

[children-of-trifarian]

Quick Rules and Mun info for Mobile

Mun

Name: Elini    Age: 21+     Gender Female (she/they)

Banner Art Done by MangakaNekoChan

Other Blogs: Main Meme Blog

Hello I am the meme queen, I am here to post dumb shit that makes me happy. I’ve been lurking around a few League of Legends rp blogs for a bit and decided to make my own. I’ve written for an rp blog once before but my main background in rping is with tabletop rpgs (Warhammer Fantasy RPG, Shadowrun, and Call of Cthulhu RPG to be specific). Please know it may take me a while to respond, so feel free to pester me occasionally. I’m just here to have fun, so if you want to chat let me know I’m very chill.

Rules

I will not write any smut or anything outwardly sexual for involving these characters. I consider that both of these characters are too young to be written in those situations and I am also personally uncomfortable with writing smut. That being said, both of my muses are still adults and still understand things of a sexual nature. Jokes and innuendos are fine, as they might make those jokes themselves which I will tag appropriately, but do not inappropriately touch or expose your muse to my characters. I will warn you once if you write anything that I am uncomfortable with but if you continue I will block you.

For shipping; I will only write romantic relationships for these characters with muses who are 18-25 years old. Anyone older than 25 I consider to be too old to be in a romantic ship with my muses, for those I will only write platonic relationships. I also want to plot and develop romantic relationships so even if I suggest it, please don’t write anything unless it’s been established. For established romantic ships with Megaera I’m okay with saying that our muses have had sex if we’ve talk about it or its been established. For Caitiff however she is asexual and I will only write her in purely romantic ships.

As said before; these muses are still adults and may write about them drinking alcohol. They are both old enough to drink responsibly, this will be tagged appropriately.

No God Mode or Instant Death, if you do send me anything like this out of context I’ll just write it as a shitpost. I would like to write combat with these muses but it should either be plotted out or we should agree on a system of dice rolling to make it seem fair.

Themes violence and war will be prevalent throughout this blog, I do not share my muses beliefs, views or actions when it comes to violence or war. This blog is for purely fictional writing purposes and I do not endorse violence, war or imperialism.

Please be specific when sending asks or starters which muse or muses you want to interact with. I’m okay with rping with both at the same time as long as it would make sense for them to be in the same location, but if you just want to interact with one of them specifically please make it clear.

I have trouble with grammar and spelling as much as I try to correct it myself. If you have problems with grammar and spelling errors you may not want to interact with me. Also please message privately if you find any of these errors before you reblog any of my posts so I can correct them.

These characters are not my own and were originally created by Riot for Legends of Runeterra, everything I write here is my own interpretation of them.

If I do anything you find offensive on my blog please politely let me know. I will try to tag what I can but feel free to message me or ask me on anon to tag something. Even if your not a mutual or an rp blogger yourself I want you to feel safe on my blog. I will not tolerate any hate and/or sexually offensive comments towards me, or guilt and toxic behavior. You will be blocked if you are excessively rude to the Mun.

[luwupercal]

I work in a library and have been ordering some Warhammer books for our collection-- what, in your opinion, would be some good choices to put on the list? Standalone or series. Just working on making more books available to the public (a couple I'd already ordered have been checked out 😊)

ooo that's a thought hmm

i'll publish this so people can share their suggestions but in terms of inside-the-box suggestions, the initial Horus Heresy trilogy (plus Flight of the Eisenstein -- don't leave people hanging!!), and i think probably it'd be a good idea also to have books about well-known Chaos marines hanging around and xeno books as well, since most of the obvious "good intro point to 40k!" suggestions are focused on the Imperium, so maybe some stuff with Ahriman since he's pretty loveable from what i've seen (people who know him better than i do can point towards more specifics lololol) and maybe some aeldari or tau-focused books, and some ork stuff might be fun? (again publishing this so people who know more can submit their thoughts).

and in terms of necron books, The Infinite and the Divine is a pretty solid book for a library to have, since it's an out and about novel and not just a novella or a short story collection; i think kids might be more inclined to pick it out? (imho the best entry points to necrons are either War in the Museum followed up by InfDiv, or Severed, but if i could jump into the eragon series with the last book kids / teens / adults / whatever bored scifi fans you entertain in your fine establishment can reasonably jump into InfDiv and not feel TOO out-of-the-loop.)

...but re: outside-the-box suggestions, Fulgrim: The Palatine Phoenix, 100%. without hesitation or doubt. i think it's a very good book for people who aren't 40k fans, but who do like scifi dystopias in general, to pick up. do i think it'll make people get into 40k? no, not really, unless they fall in love with fulgrim. but i do think they'll enjoy it very much by itself, and i dunno, i just think it's a fun book to have around

anyway if anyone has suggestions for specific titles that might be good for a library to have floating around, go ahead and add! this is a really good message tysm for sending it

[brotheralyosha]

Hey! I’ve been playing the game Spiritfarer and I think you would like it!! It’s described as “a cozy management game about death” (I found it cause i was looking for more management games like SDV.) But it’s not just a management game— it’s also a platformer, and you’re on a boat and sail around to different ports fulfilling requests and just hecking exploring. The story is also so good!! Put simply, you ferry people to the afterlife. Since it’s about death it makes me think about life and how i spend my time, and the time i spend on things as a kind of stewardship. It’s also heavily pro-union/worker’s rights. The protagonist, Stella, cares so much about everything/everyone all the time, it makes me cry. And i didn’t even mention the graphics (so cute!) or the soundtrack (very cool!). I’ve been recommending it to everyone i know but i also think that you, Elliot, specifically would like it. (I also know that you know about it since steam is stalker-y and tells me it’s on ur wishlist, so this is me saying to heckin go for it, my friend.) I’m sending this as an ask so that you can post it publicly and spread the word!!

Hello!!! This is a such lovely ask, thank you for thinking of me! Not sure if I've mentioned this before but I always feel so very happy when a friend tells me that they saw something they think I'd like or that reminded them of me. 😁😁😁

And that was an excellent choice! I heard about Spiritfarer a while back from a Waypoint review and it sounded wonderful, hence it being on my wishlist. I haven't gotten it yet because am actually taking a break from getting new games at the moment because I wanted to spend more time reading (especially because Total War Warhammer III is coming out this year and when it does that is going to be my life for a while lmaooo) but it is definitely on my list.

ALSO I have not forgotten about SDV multiplayer with you! I have actually remembered that no less than three separate times, thought to myself, "Oh yeah I'll message Echo about that as soon as I have some time" and then promptly forgotten again haha. But if you are still up for that sometime soon I would still love to!

[thelordofdarkreunion]

Magnificent Scoundrels: The Team, Part I

After having this idea buzzing through my brain for a while, I got bored and decided to write it.  This is a multi-sci-fi universe crossover story, involving the Star Wars, Star Trek, Halo, Titanfall, Mass Effect, the Marvel Cinematic Universe, Warhammer 40,000, the Empyrean Iris stories by (), and my own sci-fi story, Tongues of Fire.  

Disclaimer:

I only own Tongues of Fire.  Disney owns Star Wars, CBS owns Star Trek, Microsoft owns Halo, Respawn Entertainment owns Titanfall, Marvel owns Marvel (should be fairly obvious), Games Workshop owns Warhammer 40,000, and starr-fall-knight-rise owns Empyrean Iris.

Note: Italics indicate thoughts

Note: Star Wars, Star Trek, Halo, and Marvel (as in Marvel Comics and Marvel Cinematic Universe) exist as fictional stories in the Empyrean Iris Universe, as they were specifically mentioned or alluded to in the stories that make up that universe.  Likewise, Star Wars exists as a fictional story in the Marvel Universe, as it was specifically mentioned in several of the movies.  Otherwise, the other universes, even though they are fictional stories in the real world, do not exist as fictional stories from the respective fictional universes.

Now, sit back, relax, try not to die, and enjoy the story!

On the edge of several different galaxies 

Admiral Adam Vir walked the dark streets of what he thought was probably a long dead moon.  After the events of the past several weeks, he had received a mysterious summons from a mercenary from another galaxy to come here, this day, and hear an offer.  It was…uh, well, complicated.  Actually, complicated was putting it rather mildly, he mused.  Apparently, the man, named, he turned and discreetly checked the transcript of the message, Thomas Drake, was going to assemble a team of magnificent people to “to be all around awesome, make a ton of money, and generally get up to as many shenanigans as possible.”  This was going to end real well.

The shadows grew long as Adam, Sunny, his first lieutenant, and Krill, his medical officer, both aliens, walked into a small black building that looked like the outside of a respectable restaurant.  Two tall black-suited human guards stood at the entrance.  Strangely despite the dark, they wore eye-covering sunglasses.  As Adam and his retinue reached the entrance, the closer guard smiled.  

“Admiral Adam Vir?” he asked.  Adam forced a smile, overriding his instincts that this probably wasn’t a good idea.  Sunny and Krill shared a look.

“That’s me,” he replied.  The guard held up something that Adam recognized as a fingerprint scanner.

“Just put your hand here sir,” instructed the guard.  Adam did as he was told, and a green light blinked on the side of the device.

“You can go right in, sir,” said the guard as he opened the door for Adam and his friends.  

It was not what he expected.  It looked like an extremely high class lounge.  The windowless room was decorated with large black drapes with red trim, and had many white table-clothed booths and tables spread throughout.  There was an elegant bar on the side of the room near the door, and a dance floor on the side opposite it.  It looked quite classy, and quite cozy.  But the room itself took second place as the most interesting thing there.  By far the most interesting were the people.  Lounging and talking throughout the room, or quietly keeping to themselves and looking with suspicion at everyone else, they were probably the strangest and most varied group of people Adam had ever seen.  

Sitting far away from the door at one of the back tables, nursing a small glass of amber liquid, was a man with short-cut black hair.  He was completely by himself, and seemed rather content to remain so.  He was wearing some sort of strange, sleeveless armored vest, the likes of which Adam had never seen before.  An odd-looking green helmet with a strange x-shaped viewing slit sat on the table next to him.  The man had the look of a professional soldier, although exactly what type of soldier and from where, Adam had no idea.  

Across the way, sitting in a both, still towards the back but on the other side of the room, sat perhaps the strangest group of people Adam had ever seen, and that was saying a lot.  There were two two relatively normal looking people, a man and a woman, wearing military fatigues who glared pointedly at the two aliens in Adam's retinue when Adam looked at them.  Their regular looking appearance only served to contrast the man sitting in the middle of the both.  He had a long, scarred, rather handsome face that was framed by neatly trimmed sideburns.  Adam couldn’t really tell what color his hair was, however, because of the hat.  Where to begin with the hat?  It looked as if someone had taken several doses of LSD and tried to design an officer’s cap worn by the secret police of a fictional government agency, then made it several sizes bigger than normal.  The uniform wasn’t much better.  It was as if an insane Napoleonic-era Prussian tailor had created it, added an equally horrible-looking greatcoat, and draped the entire thing in altogether too much gold lace.  The overall effect was...bizarre, to put it mildly.  Although, now I want one, mused Adam.  The two wearing military fatigues looked at the gold-laced one, probably their boss, if the uniform quality was to be gone by, then looked back at Adams' group.  They seemed to be arguing over him, and the man made several gestures to emphasize a point before bringing his fist down on the table with a thump.  The insane-uniformed man rolled his eyes, grinned, said something that appeared to placate the two wearing fatigues, and swirled his drink experimentally before tossing it all back.  The two wearing fatigues kept glaring suspiciously in Adam’s direction.  It was only then that Adam seemed to notice the fourth person at the table.  The fourth man was sitting quietly by himself, wearing a more plain set of fatigues, bothering no one, but something about him felt...off.  Looking at the man sent chills down Adam’s spine, his collar itched for no reason, and his stomach suddenly felt slightly queasy.  He brushed it off, and kept looking across the room.

In another booth, towards the middle of the room, was...Han Solo and Chewbacca?  The hell was going on?  Was there some mercenary captain who dressed like Han Solo, the character from a 2,000 year old movie?  And there weren’t any aliens that looked like Chewbacca, or were there?  Confused, he shook his head to clear it and continued his search around the room.  His jaw dropped.  There, leaning against a wall, was the video game character Master Chief.  Another fictional character from a 2,000 year old story.  What the hell was happening?  He continued his around the room, now suspicious of where this was going.  

At another table, this time closer to the door, sat two tough looking humans males and one figure wearing a strange body suit with a purple-hued mask that completely obscured the face.  One of the humans appeared to be wearing normal civilian clothes, (the first normal one in the room, thought Vir) and the other was wearing black body armor with the numerals “N7” stamped over the right breast.  If Adam had to guess, he’d say the humans were mercenaries of some sort.  The other one, he had no idea.

Moving over to the ornate bar, located on the same wall of the room as the door, stood a tall man in a black leather greatcoat.  HIs face was movie star handsome, and framed with immaculate black hair.  He had an easy smile, and looked rather out of place in a room filled with soldiers and old fictional characters.  And talking to the man was...Captain Kirk and Spock from Star Trek.  Adam shook his head as if to clear it.  Obviously, this was some sort of fever dream, and he’d wake up in his cabin at any moment…

But it was not to be.  The door slammed open behind him, and a strangely familiar voice said, “Excuse me.”  Vir turned around, and when his eyes laid on the figure walking through the door, they almost fell out of his head.  Walking into the room was a blond-brown haired man wearing a red colored greatcoat and a small, old-fashioned music played attached to his waist.  Following the man was a green skinned human looking alien, and a raccoon walking on it’s two hind legs.  The Guardians of the Galaxy.  Another ancient fictional story, come to life.  The raccoon sneered at him.

“Finished staring?” it asked with a surprisingly human-like voice.  Adam shook his head again.

“Er, yes, yes,” he trailed off.  What was happening here?  The black haired man from the bar appeared suddenly next to him and gave an enthusiastic grin.  

“Ah Adam Vir, Sunny, Krill, Peter Quill, Gamorra, Rocket,” he addressed each of the new arrivals by name and with a small smirk as he shook each of their hands.  All the new arrivals looked at each other with confusion.  How does he know our names?  We don’t know him, seemed to be the unspoken consensus between the two groups.  “Welcome.”   He turned behind him and spoke to the rest of the room. “Alright now that everyone’s here, we can begin!  It would be best if we all sat or stood in the middle.  Yes, yes, there it is, wonderful.  You’re fine there.  C’mon, get your gluteus in gear and get over here, Han.”  Everyone shuffled somewhat awkwardly to the middle of the room.  The black haired man and several tuxedoed waiters pulled over a group of tables and chairs.  The man, who Adam guessed was their host, Thomas Drake, gestured at everyone to sit.  Most sat, with several electing to remain standing.  Drake languidly leaned against the edge of a table.

“So.  As you may already know or have already guessed, my name is Thomas Drake.  Due to several of your galaxies messing around with the fabric of time,” Drake glared pointedly at Kirk, who gave a sheepish smile, the solo military-looking man from the back of the room, who shrugged indifferently, and the elaborately uniformed man.  Said man threw out his hands in a defensive gesture.

“Hey, I’m just a humble Commissar.  If anyone’s screwing with time, it’s the Inquisition.”  Drake sighed.

“Whatever.  Anyway, before I was oh so rudely interrupted, I was saying that due to several of your galaxies screwing with time, all of our galaxies, which existed separately as alternate realities, have all combined into a massive, multi-galaxy and multi-timeline mess.  The reason that all of you are here is because, apparently unlike the rest of you, I’ve done my homework, and I’ve found something interesting.  In every one of our collective galaxies, there seems to be a badass, lucky, famous, and all around awesome soldier or mercenary.  You.”  Things were starting to make much more sense.  Drake continued, “I have invited and/or got permission for all of you to be here today for one simple reason: I plan on creating a group of all of us.  Put together, we can overcome any obstacle, learn more about this new reality of many different galaxies we are facing from inhabitants of said galaxies, cause a bunch of shenanigans, eliminate any threats to the governments we work for or the people we love, and if none of those are incentive enough, make an ungodly amount of money.”  Several people (and aliens) around the table grinned at the last one.  “I’ve already gotten permission for those who need it to join this little group, so, the only question remains,” he spread his hands wide for dramatic emphasis, “who’s in?”

Chewbacca growled something and Han Solo nodded.  “We’re in.”  The lone military-like man nodded.  

“I’m in.”  The Guardians looked at each other and nodded.

“Making tons of money and exploring new galaxies?  Oh, we’re definitely in.”  The tough-looking man with the “N7” on his armor and the hooded figure in his retinue nodded.

“I have Council authorization.  I’m in.”  Drake looked at Adam.

“And you?”  Adam’s mind was made up.  Get the chance to go through multiple galaxies, some actual fictional stories from his childhood, meet a ton of new people and get to see new aliens?  Definitely.  He looked at Sunny and Krill.  Sunny nodded, Krill merely had an exasperated look plastered on his bug-like face.

“We’re in.”  Drake looked at the elaborately-uniformed man.

“What about you?”  The man pursed his lips.  

“You got permission from the Administratum for this?” he asked skeptically.  Drake rustled through the pockets of his greatcoat and came out with a piece of parchment with a medieval-style wax seal.  

“No, I got permission from one Inquisitor Amberley Vail.  These are the written orders.”  He tossed them to the man.

“Ah.  That would explain several things.  I’m in.”  Drake turned to Kirk and Spock.

“And you two?”  Spock frowned.

“This does not seem as if it were in the best interests of the Federation.”  Drake smiled dazzlingly at him. 

“Your government would want to explore these new galaxies anyway, and who would they send?  You.  This way you have more allies to help you.”

“Fair point.  We’re in.”  Drake grinned wickedly.

“Wonderful.  Time to Rock and roll!”

[quietbluejay]

Ahriman: Exile Reread 1

So, I decided not to include my thoughts on the samples I read in between Buried Dagger and this the TLDR: Betrayer: I'm definitely intrigued but it felt like it was being unfair to Magnus :/ Angel Exterminatus: McNeill has really upped his game! The Path of Heaven: slaps roof of warhammer this franchise can fit so much chronic pain into it The Crimson King: this is what got me interested in Lucius originally

And now, the main event: Ahriman: Exile was the second ever WH40k book I ever read (first being Know No Fear), and it was basically the make or break between me staying and me leaving.

story begins with a space wolf pov and man i gotta read a space wolf book at some point, i found out there's a book where a space wolf and a thousand son end up sharing a body and then apparently they become besties so like this is a book written just for me future bluejay note: i read the sample at a later point and the book is on the list now

this guy however in the ahriman novels was as i recall my introduction to warhammer cannibalism And at this point I feel like I should maybe put a content warning. Cannibalism mentions ahead, if you've read the book it's fine, I'm not screenshotting those bits and I'm being even less descriptive

haakon (the pov guy) undergoes an experience that sounds a LOT like he has the butchers nails haakon dude r u ok

you know if i had a nickel every time in this book a dude got stripped and hung from a wall in chains and scribbled on with ink pens by one specific sorcerer i'd have two nickels which is not a lot but man, amon, you need better hobbies note from future bluejay: I misremembered oh i also forgot this bit

im sixteen pages in and we are on our SECOND cannibalism this is really gross i shouldn't have read this right after eating i was going to describe a bit and thought better of it even behind spoiler rip haakon you were alive only for the prologue chapter though wait i feel like he showed up again in a later book??? maybe it was a different gross space wolf

carmenta my beloved blorbo no, self, you have enough cosplays planned her child, for context, is the spaceship she's a rogue techpriest and she's connected to the ship

and here he is the specialest boy the sad wet beast of an evil sorcerer, the platonic ideal of a poor little meow meow

ahriman is uh, not doing very well how the mighty have fallen literally kneeling for an unsanitary blood covered dude who collects evil sorcerers like jewels

viva la vida plays in the background this is, to be honest, an uncomfortable scene, but it really works for setting the mood of the book

meanwhile ahriman is just sitting there like "his main sorcerer is going to betray him i could probably do something but what is the point of doing anything i don't know if all my powers still even work" "it was as if a portion of his soul had shrunken to a wasted shell" and meanwhile gzrel is calling him "a whipped dog among wolves" rip wolf reference ahriman doesn't actually react to that at all khayon would but ahriman basically attempts to repress all his trauma and Does Not Think about it he does that about a lot of things so yay ahriman got chosen to lead the attack on the Titan Child, he's being set up to die ahriman: ok and now over to astraeos who is also blorbo there's a lot of great characters in these books

ok so he's part of the remains of a renegade space marine chapter imperium turned on them without saying why we don't find out about this til a lot later and we find out why waaaay later and it's normally a plot i hate but it was kind of okay here because it fits the story thematically somehow he became the leader of what remains but he has no clue what to say also they're guarding carmenta

Gee I wonder why your powers don’t work any more Do I really need to know about the bloody mucus, French?

the overwhelming message im getting from this is "chaos space marines are gross and unsanitary"

ok i don't remember this either something possessed the dude next to ahriman and now there's frost everywhere it's speaking to ahriman and also everyone else is frosen in time "i am your fate come round at last" spooky note from future bluejay: arc words! arc words!

carmenta: ah my death is here i will be free at last but oops astraeos rescued her ahhh okay so she found him and his brothers floating lost in space and she rescued them and thats why they swore to protect her

ahriman 🤝 carmenta hearing ominous voices behind their thoughts ahriman 🤝 carmenta "you know what just let me die here"

oops ahriman's repression failed traumatic flashbacks to his brother's death time oh yikes rip astraeos he's a prisoner and they took one of his eyes and he's being hung from the ceiling with HOOKS IN HIS SKIN euerrrrgh rusty hooks man french is really going out of his way to emphasize the whats the right term the physical elements and the horrible reality of what it would be like, it's very visceral but also lmao trying to earn the mature rating for the book as if it didn't with the cannibalism

i don't think it's overshooting the horror im just trying to make a joke to lighten my mood because this book gets dark i actually had to take breaks when i was reading it originally because I was in a pretty bad mental place at the time oh yeah ding we have a third character held prisoner naked and hanging from the ceiling though tbh astraeos' situation is worse than haakon's or than future ahrimans will be note from future bluejay: you misremembered, there are 3 times characters are imprisoned and vulnerable and hanging from the ceiling but in only two cases were they naked and cannibalized, no one ate ahriman and he got to keep his tunic. To be fair to past bluejay, it is a weird thing to pop up multiple times in the first place

both of them they were both betrayed by the imperium that created them and outcast by it

astraeos is unsettling ahriman oh this is why he adopts astraeos isn't it

it's because he reminds him of himself and then he shapes astraeos into himself including his own mistakes…. third cannibalism at least it happened offscreen ahriman feel supernatural fear French does a good job at conveying the creeping feeling of something wrong at your back ;-; ahriman kept all the physical things he could from his time in the TS

forget bad mental health day ahriman is having a bad mental health millenium

I can't help but hear this as a riff on the "we should improve society somewhat" meme

so i am STILL not sure if it's the voice of something else in his head or not maybe this time when i finish the trilogy i will have clarity the end got really confusing

oh hey time for him to meet carmenta

and then he warns her to be careful oh gross not the human tallow candles again this was I think my first encounter with them, but sadly not my last of course they didn't do a good job rendering you think these guys know how to properly render anything it explicitly smells like meat

the visitors are thousand sons ahriman basically has a panic attack

oh ahriman is happy :D visitor is someone he knows and actually liked him

ahriman: i'm not alone :D :D :D meanwhile he keeps having visions oops "the vision slipped into his mind like a razor" i love french's similes tolbek threatens gzrel a bit and then ahriman and him talk via telepathy tolbek: you must come with me ahriman: sorry no tolbek surprise attacks it's super effective

annnnd ahriman awakens his power again

after centuries of depression, local man finally feels something and it's joy that he's going to kill someone he knew rip and then ahriman turns into a killing machine rip everyone in the room you're all dead also things get trippy with visions

oh, honey sometimes, having hope is bad because this is wh40k

but this is where it starts he's at his lowest point but he's going to start to climb oh welp he didn't kill one dude just broke his mind

ahriman: i almost feel bad for him then he remembers that this is the guy that ate astraeos' eye and tortured him ahriman: nvm and then for some reason (vision he had) he doesn't kill Maroth seriously at this point i have to think it was something making him not do it the first thing ahriman does is go to free astraeos

the thing he does not want to do is he frees astraeos anyways so now astraeos feels obligated because his honour and obligation are all he has left time for carmenta to be a badass

elmo emoji

anyways the prose is definitely holding up the weird stuff feels weirder, somehow

thinking about how fast ahriman gets attached to carmenta and astraeos but doesn't really admit it to himself which is a repeating pattern in his life thought I had last night: he has the wisdom and critical thinking skills that God gave a slug

let me amend it, that's mean to slugs ahriman does not have the wisdom and sense that God gave a slug i had some thoughts about ahriman and astraeos and some of the themes of this book but they aren't entirely coherent but basically about ahriman being at his kindest when he's at his lowest point mentally and physically and also tbh at his wisest and as he gets in better shape he loses that to his all consuming focus

ahriman is basically the manifestation of that diane di prima poem all he has is a collection of means

[the-unsleeping-bi]

Attention anyone who enjoys fanfiction of Warhammer 40K novels! Over the past few months, I devoured the whole Ciaphas Cain series and wrote a series of short fics as I went. Since they're all pretty much stand-alone and only very loosely connected, I thought I'd make this post listing them all with a bit of summary and detail, to help people pick and choose which ones they might be interested in reading!

A lot of them don't require much specific knowledge of the source material, since I wrote most of them when I wasn't finished reading it all myself either, and focused a lot more on the characters and their relationships than on specific plot events. Also, many of them are way more about sex than anything else (and I'm shipping Cain with absolutely everyone at once, because why not), but with varying levels of explicitness and seriousness about it, plus there's also one of them in there that's just funny and not sexual at all. So I think there's something for everyone! If that sounds good to you, check out the list below, and enjoy!

For each one of these I'll give a brief description/reflection, and list the main ship in it, whether you need much knowledge of canon to get it, and the level of smuttiness.

Note from the Inquisitorial Archives #1: In retrospect, this one kind of feels like it was a warm-up to the rest of the series. It's entirely from Amberley's perspective, which kind of sets it apart because I soon switched to mostly writing from Cain's perspective for the rest of the series, and really not much happens in it. But it's the origin of some cute ideas that have stuck with me and it's okay! Enjoy it maybe! Main Ship: Cain/Amberley Required Canon Knowledge: minimal Smut Level: mild

Note #2: This one was heavily influenced by some of the other great Cain fanfiction I found on Ao3 after posting my first one! I was really happy to see a few other people exploring the same characters, and it inspired me to keep going too. Anyway this one is pretty cute I think. Main Ship: Cain/Jurgen Required Canon Knowledge: best if you've read book 3 or at least don't mind it getting spoiled by way of references to major events Smut Level: medium

Note #3: I feel like this is where my writing of this series really hit its stride! This one is about a threesome and it's great, highly recommend reading it. Main Ship: Cain/Amberley/Jurgen Required Canon Knowledge: minimal Smut Level: high

Note #4: Another one I'm especially proud of, which I wrote with a burst of inspiration in just one day. Amberley introduces Cain to some light bondage, and it's very cute. Main Ship: Cain/Amberley Required Canon Knowledge: best if you've at least read book 1 and have some general understanding of Cain's character and the pressures of his career Smut Level: high

Note #5: A longer one! This one has three chapters, one of which is from Amberley's perspective instead of Cain's, which all sets up for them having a threesome with Felicia Tayber. It comes especially highly recommended from my friend @sybilius​, whose support has generally helped a lot with my writing. Thanks! Main Ship: Cain/Amberley/Felicia Required Canon Knowledge: best if you've read book 4 so you know who Felicia is Smut Level: medium

Note #6: A rare entry which is actually not about sex at all, it's just funny! I hope so anyway. Involves Cain getting really drunk and Jurgen putting up with a series of silly antics. Main Ship: Cain/Amberley is like, an element of the plot, but it's less about that than it is about Cain drunkenly stumbling around a starship Required Canon Knowledge: best if you've read the short story "The Traitor's Gambit" (the one in between books 5 and 6 in the omnibus), since it basically functions as an epilogue to it, but it doesn't rely on it so much that you wouldn't be able to appreciate it without that Smut Level: Zero! What a concept.

Note #7: This one is just about Cain and Amberley being into BDSM. Involves her slapping him in the face, like, in a hot way. Main Ship: Cain/Amberley Required Canon Knowledge: minimal Smut Level: Depends on your definition of smut I guess, since it doesn't really describe anything directly sexual, but you know what I'd still say high

Note #8: It was high time to add yet another character to my growing list of people I ship Cain with. Involves some creative and probably extremely not canon interpretation of space marine lore. Main Ship: Cain/Drumon Required Canon Knowledge: best if you've read book 7 Smut Level: medium

Note #9: Okay this is another one I'm extra proud of, I think it's very funny. The concept is that it's a passage written by Sulla, describing a time she allegedly slept with Cain, but Amberley has a lot of comments to make about stuff she thinks is inaccurate. Main Ship: Cain/Sulla Required Canon Knowledge: best if you're familiar with some of the bits where Amberley comments on Sulla's writing (also it's set during book 8 but doesn't rely on much specific knowledge of that) Smut Level: high-ish but not at all in a way that's meant to be taken seriously

Note #10: My most recent and also most explicit one! I did a little bit of actual research on what kind of video-call-type technology exists in 40K just so that I could write about Cain and Amberley making creative use of it. This one is hopefully very relatable to people in long-distance relationships. Main Ship: Cain/Amberley Required Canon Knowledge: minimal Smut Level: high

Also, separately from this series, I wrote another pretty cute Cain/Amberley one called Divine Providence. It's specifically based on another fic, Attalander's A Sinner And A Saint, so check that one out first if you're interested! I've also written a couple fics for other 40K novels too: my very first 40K fic about Bannick from Baneblade and Shadowsword fucking a chaos marine, and a very short one about Sebastian Yarrick and Dominic Seroff that takes place near the beginning of Imperial Creed. Maybe you'll like those too!

If you read that whole list, thanks, and I hope you find something to enjoy! I'll probably write more soon, so follow me here or on Ao3 if you want to see it. And feel free to comment or message me if you want to talk about Ciaphas Cain! Have a good day!