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nerd-of-karasuno · 11 months

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Itadori Yuji Dating Headcannons

word count: 2k

note: I am not taking requests for JJK at the moment. I may open them eventually, but for now, it's just Haikyu!! and My Hero Academia with maybe some Blue Lock mixed in (unless maybe you all have good Yuji requests I might do some...). I just love Yuji sm so I had write this. Hope y'all enjoy!! 💕

my dating headcannons masterlist

This is the sweetest boy right here

Yuji gives the best hugs.

He's so gentle and sweet.

You're friends right off the bat.

Yuji makes friends so easily.

He becomes very attached to you right away.

Yuji realizes he likes you when he's lying in bed late at night

he doesn't know what to do tbh

His feelings for you aren't too obvious, but at the same times there are moments that are pretty telling if you're paying attention.

It's the way he holds onto you longer during hugs more than he does with anyone else

The way he always checks to see if you're still with the group and enjoying yourself while you're out with friends

And the way that he offers you any snacks and food he has first before he offers to the rest of the people with you.

The way that you catch his eye when you walk in the room, that he can't help but stare for a few seconds, admiring you.

The way that he'll slightly lean into you laughing when you're sitting right next to him

I could go on forever about the different ways Yuji loves you

But anyway, movie nights are a requirement when you're friends with Yuji.

He probably has a day every week that he invites you, Megumi, and Nobara to watch a movie all together.

Yuji always have an unsaid claimed spot next to you.

he dives to get into that spot, which changes depending on where you're still, and he does this before you're dating too.

If you're a movie nerd, Yuji gets so excited to talk to you about movies

And even if you're not, Yuji is just as eager to talk about movies with you

It's cute hearing him talk, please listen to him

but keep in mind, he could go on for a very long time.

when the confession eventually happens, it goes either one of two ways.

Yuji smoothly pulls it off with all his practice in front of the mirror paying off

he completely stumbles his way through it

but it's so cute and super sweet and genuine that it probably gets you to fall for him even more

If you ever confront Yuji about his crush on Jennifer Lawrence, he'll get so bashful.

I feel like Todo would be the one to tell you that Yuji mention to him during their days at their old school that he found Jennifer Lawrence.

You'll definitely have a Hunger Games marathon at some point in your relationship.

Pillow fights happen every few movie nights

especially if you argue about something in the movie

Like one of you didn't like something in it or are debating which movie of a series is the best one

The pillow fights decides all.

For actual fights between you and Yuji though, Yuji has always been good at making it back up to you if he did something wrong.

sometimes he needs space after an argument but he comes back pretty quickly.

one of the first fights he went to Gojo for advice and immediately regretted it. Gojo had some good advice overall but it was covered up by some story or stories he was telling while giving it and Yuji didn't make the connection

Megumi and Nanami offer excellent advice however for any situation

usually at least one of them can't bother with the situation if Yuji is asking for advice on what to do for a date or anything like that, but one of the two always respond when it's an argument because they know how much Yuji and you mean to each other

unless it's a silly argument ofc.

Nobara also gives great advice, but sometimes she's a lil too picky with Yuji on what she gives advice on and goes off on other things about him that he could work on

im sorry, she cares a lot but I feel like she would go on tangents sometimes. We still love her very much

But Nobara is such an awesome wingwoman for both you and Yuji

Girl has the best ideas for dates and gifts and so much more.

Gojo 100% ships you and Yuji if he finds that you're right for each other

especially if he notices that you like each other before the confession

oh my gosh he gets so excited that two of his students are into each other

he tries to help out a little by putting you on missions together and gets you two to run errands together too

different things like that but occasionally it's very obvious that Gojo is trying to set the both of you up.

Nanami has told Gojo numerous times to back off because he too is one of the first to notice the connection between you and Yuji.

but of course we all know that doesn't exactly work out.

Yuji even gets you a lil tiger plush, somewhat as a joke because of his high school nickname

He thinks it's really cute when you hold the plush and it always makes him smile to see the plush in your room

If you name the tiger after him, he dies inside due to your sweetness

If you also attend Jujutsu High, Yuji sneaks into your dorm room regularly.

He loves holding you and spending nights with you, especially after rough missions

and after certain events like with what happened to Junpei

Yuji was able to hold it for quite awhile but he eventually ends up collapsing in your arms, saying nothing.

usually he's the big spoon but it's moments like these that he just needs you to hold him tight and play with his hair

no words necessary he just wants to be close to you.

Moving on... Yuji plays with your hair and fidgets with your fingers quite a lot

Yuji allows you to do the same to him if you want.

He's always open to new stuff that you tell him about

Oh there's a new restaurant? Wanna go tomorrow? You wanna play a new video game or wanna go see a new movie? Just tell him and he'll do it with you. He'll even let you put makeup on him or paint his nails if you'll really eager to

Okay kinda random, but arcade dates anyone?

Yuji will get competitive and he will try to get you to bet little things just for fun.

Also cat cafe dates?? I feel like Yuji would be so excited to go if you agree too

then he gets there and he scares some of the cats away by accidentally being too loud 😭

but the sight of you petting the cats and then snuggling up to you makes him feel better

except he didn't get to pet as many cats as you.

also dancing in your rooms together??

it'll be so random a lot of the times

but if there's music playing Yuji will try to get you to dance with him and if it's a really fun song, sing along as well.

Yuji hates when Sukuna talks around you and he tries to make sure Sukuna never talks directly to you

He doesn't want you to deal with him whatsoever

that doesn't stop Sukuna making remarks about your relationship in Yuji's head tho

especially since Yuji thinks about you a lot and Sukuna gets tired of it

He complained to you once about it when he actually managed to get a mouth to appear on Yuji's cheek

Yuji got so flustered and slapped his cheek so hard.

If you are ever assigned to fight against each other in training, Yuji immediately tries to change partners

Nothing against you, he knows that you're strong and he 100% respects that

Yuji is just extremely worried that he'll hurt you somehow

And he never ever wants to do that

Though if you do charge at him, he'll respond and up his defense if you're really going out

After that first fight that you start, Yuji'll become more comfortable with fighting against you in training

He was legitimately terrified when you came straight at him.

But you two fighting together? Yuji really enjoys working alongside you

power couple honestly

Yeah, he worries that you might get hurt but you're so beautiful in his eyes when you fight

I swear the first mission you go on together even if it was before you began dating, Yuji got distracted by you fighting whatever curse and stared a little to long

the next thing you know is Yuji is being thrown back at a wall

oh no my boy

Yuji quickly shakes it off but he refuses to admit what actually happened if you try to question him

If you tell anyone at Jujutsu High, they all can kinda place together the pieces and figure it out

Poor Yuji gets teased about that moment by quite a few people gojo im looking at you

...sorry need a gap cuz Tumblr wants a character block limit...

Yuji also gets teased a little when showing off once or twice during training

look he only does it when you're around

He can't help it

Yuji genuinely just wants to impress you

Really he just wants you to think that's he's cool

He doesn't care to much what others think

Except when they're teasing him constantly

Words of encouragement from you please if you're willing?

Actually please do that

Yuji struggles with the events that have happened in his life since he ate Sukuna's finger

so words of encouragement from you mean the absolute world to him

Your support in general really

With any way that you can show appreciation for him, Yuji becomes so soft

his mind's a mess

sukuna's not helping

man he loves you so much

you keep Yuji going

He's so grateful for that and he'll let you know.

he can't believe someone like you is willing to put so much love and spend so much time with him

sukuna shush yuji doesn't need your opinion on this

It takes him a little bit but eventually Yuji becomes very vulnerable with you

He's always been an pretty open person, but you're one of the first to see him wholely as himself, weaknesses and all

Yuji finds you so comforting

in quite a few different ways

He loves your hugs, for one

If Yuji can hold you for a bit, he'll be very happy and content

He loves resting his head on yours if you're short than him

If you're taller than him, he doesn't mind you doing the same to him

But piggy back rides? No one at Jujutsu High questions Yuji running around carrying you on his back anymore

They've all learned not to question a lot of silly things that you do with Yuji to be honest.

as long as no one is dying or injured it's probably fine - a quote probably said by a witness at Jujutsu High

Yuji thinks it's hilarious if any of the stuff that the students think about his and your actions get back to him

It makes him wanna do more semi chaotic stuff around the school.

please stop him at any time if you notice that it may be too much

You have Yuji's full heart when you're in a relationship with him

He adores you utterly

all these moments he's had with you, all the good times and the bad, Yuji Itadori wouldn't change for the world.

Yeah sometimes things weren't good between the two of you

Sometimes the circumstances around the two of you were awful

But those moments and those situations got you and Yuji to where you are now

and Yuji could not be happier.

523 notes · View notes

lbxbx · 6 months

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Cockpit 2 | knj

Pair: Namjoon x reader

Summary: Namjoon goes through a rough time while getting a divorce, meeting you at the club two weeks in a row when attraction becomes unreal.

Rating: +18 mature content, Smut, divorce, fatherhood,

Previous | Next

Two weeks later you decided on going to the same club you celebrated Yoongi’s last weekend as a single man, and after a long debate with yourself, you choose a tight red dress with spaghetti straps which compliments your boobs, and you take pride in them.

You have the same table booked, Hoseok knows someone who manages to get the same table for you every time.

“I’m so sorry, I got off work late.” Taehyung joins you finally. “I had to get home and change, what did I miss?”

Taehyung’s personality and duality scares you. You and him met in a club, he seemed like the typical bad boy that was out of every girl’s league, until he got drunk and super wasted, and you started taking body shots off of each other, he needed friends like you, and he considers you the closest to him and his safe space he can be himself and comfortable. He comes to you when he has any minor inconvenience in his life, and you do a great job helping him, but with people outside of your circle, he’s suddenly mean, quiet and obnoxious, everyone gets obnoxious around new people, but he completely refuses to give in quickly, he has to study everyone first, he’s absolutely intelligent in a different way, and he can find out an individual’s personality based off of looks.

“Yoongi and Mia arrived to Mauritius.” You unlock your phone to show him a picture Yoongi sent to your group chat, Yoongi and Mia feeding a giant turtle. Taehyung pouts. “We should have gone with them.”

“Honey moon is for sex and none of us is getting laid any time soon.” Jimin says in a serious tone, which makes Taehyung immediately interrupt- “Speak for yourself, I have a girlfriend.”

“You’re right, I think I grew my virginity back.” Jimin’s laugh is immediately wiped off when Jin kicks him in the shin. You click your tongue at Jin. “But he’s right.” You shrug. “Last time I had sex was back in march and I wasn’t so happy about it.”

“Oh please tell them what happened.” Hoseok took a sip of his drink, they look at you waiting for you to finish your story.

“No, my sex life is not going to be tonight’s topic.” You point at Hoseok, knowing if you finish your story they’re going to judge you so hard for it, they’re men after all.

“It’s an interesting subject and we’re all adults.” Jungkook interrupts and looks at Hoseok. “Is it that bad?”

Hoseok nods and you roll your eyes at him.

“What happened?” Seokjin asks, leaning forward eager to know more.

It is getting more embarrassing speaking of your sex life around a table full of men, but you actually finish. “I faked it and I don’t regret it.”

They are genuinely upset around the table as if you offended every man on planet earth and hurt their pride.

“Just tell him how he could’ve done it.” Jin whines, and Hoseok agrees. “That’s what I told her.”

“Oh shut up,” You huff and straighten your back. “One of you, get up and get us drinks let’s start the night.”

Jungkook excuses himself to use the bathroom, Jin gets up to order drinks and Jimin had to take a call outside the club.

Sitting across from Hoseok who was discussing with Taehyung the last time he had sex, you examine the club and look around, fingers intertwined, you start swaying your shoulders to the music before you grab your bottle of water and untwist it to take a few sips, you manage to spell some on your dress and chest which makes you gasp because that water is too cold for your liking.

“Shit.” You cuss under your breath and freeze in your chair, Taehyung is the first one to react and gets up. “I’ll get you tissues.” But Hoseok was even quicker to burrow some tissues from table right behind him, a familiar voice rings right across you, from behind Hoseok.

“There you go.”

“Thank you.” Hoseok pulls a few tissues and helps you dry yourself, you try to look behind Hoseok but he moves a lot and he is standing in the way, you grow impatient to know who that voice belongs to.

Hoseok finally sits down after making sure you’re alright, and finally about time, your eyes meet with the owner of that familiar voice.

Namjoon.

The moment your eyes meet, your stomach drops and you feel your shoulders tensing, you press your thighs together, and your lip lifts up in a tiny grin, you actually did get to see him again.

Your chest rises higher when your breathing becomes quicker and you clear your throat.

Are you nervous or just horny and thirsty over Namjoon?

He grabs his drink and takes a tiny sip, mirroring your grin, his dimple barely showing which makes you panic, because at this moment, you’re high key just staring at him with lifted eyebrows and wide eyes.

Hoseok and Taehyung to immersed in the conversation to notice.

You out of habit cross your legs and chew down on your lip, Jin comes back with so many drinks in his hands, he can barely put them down, Hoseok helps him and you finally take the drink you ordered in your hands, you bring it closer to your mouth, eyes still attached to Namjoon, you wink at him the way her winked at you that night, and you take a huge sip of your drink. Did you actually just do that? You’re totally panicking on the inside.

You try so hard to maintain your facial expression and keep it steady, which makes you clearly see him stress about it, he puts his drink down and scratches the back of his dark hair, he laughs too which makes him earn looks and stares from friends, he says something to them and you see him explain with his hands, his long fingers and knuckles making a show entertaining enough for you to glue your eyes to.

You hide your laugh behind your cup and take another sip. He’s clumsy.

“Y/N” Jimin calls out your name, you snap your head to him, he’s holding a tray full of shots. “We’re playing truth or dare, are you joining?”

You look back at Namjoon, you see him putting his hands on the table and using it for support to get up, he heads to the bar and faces the dance floor, his elbows leaning back on the bar, he looks at you and tilts his head towards the empty chair next to him. Is he asking you to come?

You decide to act on it quickly and shake your head to Jimin, “You guys start, I need to get a few more drinks before.” You get up and put your hand behind Jimin’s back. “I’ll join you when I’m ready.”

They already start arguing over the rules of the game, you make your way towards the bar slowly, you know he’s watching you, you brush softly against his shoulder which makes your nose pick up his manly cologne and now that you’re standing next to him, this man is so big and tall.

His breath is already irregular and yours is too, but you applaud yourself for not making it obvious, you can feel his big arm brushing against your bare skin and so can he, your skin burns him, and with that alone, he rewinds the scenario he saw in the shower, and he tells himself to focus.

You try so hard not to look at him with the corner of your eyes, and you focus on the bartender, you clear your throat and say in a tone you don’t recognize, you actually cringe at yourself on the inside, are you really trying to sound calm and sexy?

But it works because Namjoon just unlocked something new to use in his imagination when he jerks off to you in the shower.

“Can I please get a mojito—“ You turn to look at Namjoon, you eye him from head to toe, “And a beer for the gentleman.”

Namjoon is already struggling with you, he realizes that both of you are making a move on each other, so he’s trying to stay calm and cool.

“Coming right up.” The bartender leaves to make you the drinks. The tension increases and you look at him, his eyes meet yours, before he laughs, covering his mouth with the back of his hand.

You laugh too and climb up on the stool, you cross your legs and lean one elbow on the bar, facing Namjoon.

It takes seconds for you to pick up courage to start the talk since he isn’t saying anything.

“You’re the one who asked me to come here.” You start, he nods slowly, eyes focused on people on the dance floor. “Well, practically, I didn’t.”

He’s so nervous, so are you, but he’s way more nervous than you are.

“Mhm.” You nod, staring at his face from aside, his nose, his lips between his teeth, you lean your chin on your palm and still look at him and eating him with your eyes.

He can feel your eyes on him, he turns and meets your eyes, he laughs nervously again, you feel bad for him so you actually decide to look away and make him less uncomfortable, the bartender puts your drinks down, you grab the beer and hand it to Namjoon, then grab your drink and clink it with the beer in his hand.

He looks at you, this time not laughing, he brings the bottle closer to his mouth and takes a gulp, eyes still connected to yours, you take a sip from your drink and put it down.

“Are those your friends?” You point your head towards the table he was sitting at.

He nods. “Co workers actually.”

“What do you do?” You tilt your head, trying to build an image in your head, he looks like someone employed in a company, you’ve seen him twice, every time dressed in a suit. Probably a bank. No he could a teacher.

“Do you want to guess?” He studies your face. “You’re already trying to guess.”

“Smart ass, Hmm..” You nod and laugh when he laughs, you’re amused, is he actually smart or were you too easy to read?

“I’m a—“ He’s interrupted by you shaking your head, you want to play this game now. “Let me try and guess.”

He finds it cute, he closes his mouth and gestures you with hands to go ahead and try to guess.

You look into his face and try to build an image of what he could do in his life? Not that tanned, so it must be an indoor job, tall and big which means he could be an athlete, not too big to be a coach, he looks smart, probably a teacher? No offence to teachers but they’re not that sculpted and good looking.

Your eyes switch down to his body, you look at his hands, then look back at him, wondering if it’s okay to look at them, he shrugs and gives you his right hand, you hold it into yours, twist and turn it, look at his fingers, long and fucking attractive but he totally doesn’t draw or grade papers.

“At least give me a hint.” You shrug, letting go of his hand even though you don’t want to, secretly wondering if it’s okay to put them in your mouth at the spot. “Do you wear a uniform?” You snap yourself out of your thoughts.

He nods. Your brain starting to work harder than before, could he a police officer? Or in health care? Probably a soldier, he could be a chef too, they wear uniforms too.

“Do you cook?” You ask which makes him laugh like you said the biggest and fattest joke ever. “Actually no, I suck at cooking.”

You giggle and tilt your head. “Do you work in a building?”

He shakes his head. “Nope.” You’re even more confused now.

“Just tell me what do you do.” You say in frustration, he finds your lack of patience cute, he takes a sip and actually blurts out the job that you never expected to hear at all, but now you think about it, it suits him so much.

“I’m an aircraft pilot.” He says, his fingers intertwining together.

Your jaw visibly drops, they do actually exist, you only saw pilots in airports or in movies, you would’ve never thought you’d meet one in actual life.

“You’re a captain?” You squeak, he nods, his eyes on your lips, busted for staring at them, your head moves slowly left and right. “That’s so fucking hot.”

You actually just said that, you can’t be totally proud of yourself.

“Tell me more about Y/N,” His voice sounded so deep and low, making you tilt your head, he looks totally different to you now.

“What do you want to know?” You ask in return, he takes another gulp and puts his beer down. “What do you do?” He changes his tone for emphasis and stares at you, he’s probably pretending to be assuming but he already knows since he saw your pass card the other week.

“Can I guess?” He asks, which makes you scoff and bite back. “It’s totally unfair, you already saw my pass card.”

He looks confused for a second but shrugs right after, his lips forming a small pout. “But I was being genuinely serious, I just saw your first name.”

He did sound honest but for all you know he could be lying, you nod and tell him to try to guess, which makes him turn to fully face you, he hands now on his thighs, his head slightly tilted to the side, he’s trying so hard to find a job that he thinks matches someone as attractive as you are.

He hums, “Literature probably.” He questions, “A teacher, or a writer. Although your personality gives me the vibe of a human resources type of girl.”

He’s thinking out loud, trying to read your face seeing if your facial expression changes when he mentions the jobs, waiting for you to say yes, but you don’t give him anything to start with.

It’s so hard for him to focus, you think he’s staring at you trying to guess what you do, but he’s just feeding his eyes that are hungry for you, it was given to him on a silver platter, little do you know he’s biting your nipples in his head.

“It’s definitely not as interesting as yours.” You interrupt his train of thoughts, the body language on this man is driving you insane, the way he sits, the face he makes when he thinks, his fingers tapping on his thick thighs. You take a sip from your drink and look behind you at your friends making loud noises heard across the club, they’re enjoying their game.

“Tell me.” He gives up.

“I’m an emergency medicine resident.” He seems genuinely shocked and surprised, words struggling to come out of his so goddamn juicy lips, he ends up saying “Wow.” Then laughing.

“What’s funny Namjoon?” You lift an eyebrow, he’s a little startled when he heard his name, he looks at you and shakes his head. “No offense, doctors are not that good looking, and you’re too young—“ He’s interrupted with you smacking down your pass card on the counter and pushing it towards him.

“Not that I have to prove it to you.” You challenge him, he looks at the pass card and scratches the back of his head. “I’m sorry.”

You felt bad for him because you weren’t offended, he was over thinking his attitude, and to help ease his torture, you grab back the card and stand up, you’re standing way too close to him right now, he’s worried you’re mad or upset, you shoot him a soft grin to let him know that there’s no hard feelings.

“It’s okay, I need to get back to my friends.” You say, hand rising to slowly tug on a strand of his pushed back dark hair, you’re subtly flirting, but you also make him want you more.

He froze in his seat, eyes attached to yours, the look on his face almost as if he’s afraid he won’t see you again, he’s not done with you and he wants more, and things can’t end this way.

You want more too, but he’s still a man, you can’t offer him anything without him offering it first, or he should at least show some effort and ask for more.

A wild and loud debate is going through his head now, you can clearly see it because his mouth opens slightly, he’s about to say something but he stops.

“Enjoy the rest of your night.” Yeah you’re actually about to leave before he politely asks. “Hey, Y/N?”

“Hmm?” You act so innocent although you’re 100% sure he’s about to ask for a way to stay in touch, and he actually does.

“Can I get your phone number?”

Do you want to tease or should you just give it to him? Wait no, he’s a total stranger and you’re giving him your phone number? Now you’re the one who’s having a major debate in your head, you saw this man only twice and you’re already exchanging phone numbers?

You need to think fast and weigh things out, he’s a fucking hot airplane craft—

“Yeah sure.”

Really? Could you be faster than this? It comes out from you almost as if it’s a natural reflex. You didn’t even give yourself a chance to think twice, you wanted to say yes even if you weighed things out and his cons overcome his pros.

He takes his phone out and you end up exchanging phone numbers. You end up saving him as ‘NJ’, you close your phone and throw it back into your purse, you look at him one last time and your lip lifts in a tiny smirk. “So, I guess I’ll see you around, Namjoon.”

His eyes are on your lips when he swallows, the lips he imagined doing things to his dick in the shower.

“Yeah, I’ll see you around.” He snaps out of his dirty thoughts, he stands up too, and puts his hands into his pockets, his chest almost brushing against yours, his eyes very clearly move to your exposed cleavage, gosh if you only knew what is going through his wild imagination.

You turn and make your way to your friends, his eyes are totally checking out your lovely ass.

You feel your sweat on your lower back and chest, you grab a tissue and take your seat next to Hoseok, “Are you okay chief?” And you giggle at the nickname he hasn’t used in a long time.

“Yeah, I’m fine.” You put your hand his leg and he wraps an arm around you.

You chose truth which makes Jungkook whine, the game is not as fun as he wants, so he decided to give you hard time and ask you very explicit questions.

You swing back a shot when he asks you if you’ve ever sent nudes to anyone, of course you’re not going to answer that. Although you’re quite positive that drinking your shot already means yes you did, and you actually did do it before. Which you are not happy nor proud about.

Oh god your head is already spinning so much, you’ve lost count of how many shots that are now in your system, and you’re at that stage where you know it’s about to be too late, and if you continue, you will end up having a shitty hangover in the morning after.

“Come on Hobi it’s your turn.” You put your shot glass down. “Truth or dare?”

“Truth.” Hoseok doesn’t think twice which makes Jungkook whine even more, you huff. “Just choose dare, this kid is about to throw a tantrum.”

Jungkook flips you off and Hoseok proceeds. “Fine dare.” He rolls up his sleeves, you’re looking at Hoseok but behind him is the guy that you started your night with, just looking at you eagerly and his eyes not leaving you, they burn.

He’s still there with some friends, and what seems like a few of them left. You cross your arms over your chest which makes his eyes travel down to your chest again, you know he’s looking and you’re glad he is.

The boys hardly notice anything when they’re drunk, but the only one who’s been not drinking is Seokjin since he carpooled you to the club and he’s going to drop all of you home. He sees your eyes focusing elsewhere, follows your eyesight which leads him to Namjoon, he knows where Namjoon’s looking at, boys will be boys.

Seokjin can read you like an open book, since both of you think so much like each other, you two share the same birthday, only he is a few years older than you

And Seokjin’s hunch tells him that you and Namjoon are drooling over each other and you’re sharing looks of hunger.

“Hobi.” Seokjin starts. “I dare you to dare Y/N to kiss the guy on that table.”

Fuck you’re busted.

You snap your head at Seokjin and he shrugs, what is he trying to do?

And you’re even more embarrassed when all of them turn and look at Namjoon simultaneously, making Namjoon visibly nervous, and you feel extremely bad for him.

“You guys are so stupid.” You cover your face in mere embarrassment when Namjoon looks back at you, he’s confused.

“Come on he’s good looking.” Hoseok being the loud person he is, turns to you when he whines, as if that’s what you were complaining about.

You know how he’s so damn attractive, but you just exchanged numbers with that man, kissing might just ruin everything, or it could spice things up.

“He’s been staring at you the entire night.” Seokjin says, getting up and actually pulling your chair back while you’re still in it.

“Seokjin no.” You’re panicking, you totally refuse, smart enough to remember your standards, you never make a move on a man first.

“What if he comes and kisses you?” Jungkook is already on his feet and walking towards the table next to you.

You shake your head quick in utter panic and bite on your own teeth begging for Jungkook to come back. “Jeon Jungkook get back here.”

Well, it’s too late, because he already excused Namjoon out of the table, which confuses Namjoon even more.

Oh my god, your face is burning and your body is on fire!

You see Jungkook standing with his back facing your table, shakes hands with Namjoon, then points behind him with his thumb before crossing his arms, they both turn and look at you, Fuck. They’re walking closer.

“Hey, Y/N, this is Namjoon.” Jungkook introduces and you act oblivious, so does Namjoon, he’s totally not hiding his smirk. “This is my friend, Y/N. She hasn’t kissed a guy since march.”

Oh my god this brat keeps embarrassing you more and more you’re genuinely so close to crying, you want the floor to swallow you and you want to disappear.

Namjoon reaches his hand out to shake yours, “Kim Namjoon, haven’t kissed a woman in months too.” He introduces his full name and laughs, the guys laugh too, how are they even laughing this isn’t funny.

You shake his hand as if you haven’t before, totally surprised when he tightens his grip on your hand and pulls you closer, he just cuts to the chase and moves his hands lower to reach your hips.

Now that you’re even closer, this man is tall enough to make you almost tip toe, the smell of his cologne mixed with the alcohol and smoke is already doing wonders to you and sending you somewhere else, you’re drooling and it’s not from your mouth.

The feeling of his hot palms on your hips almost makes you want to collapse in his big arms.

Deep down in your head you grow impatient to feel his lips against yours, your stomach twisting in turning in pure excitement and arousal, you’re about to kiss the captain.

His nose brushes against yours and you can feel his hot breath against your lips, your hands moving to his biceps to feel them, it feels weird to do that in front of your friends, but they’re enjoying it, and they’re drunk and you think you are too, but this whole thing is more than enough to sober you up.

In a quick move Namjoon turns you so your back faces your friends, clears his throat and whispers low enough for both of you to hear, his lips softly touching yours with each letter he says. “I kind of wished they dared me to fuck you, because I want to.”

Your breath hitches and you’re already drunk on his touch, but now this man even has a dirty mouth that he uses shamelessly.

He finally pulls you closer for a kiss which you can feel your ears buzzing right away, and your legs feel like jelly. Your lips touch and melt together from the heat both of you radiating, you expect it to be a soft kiss but the attraction, you could swear there’s a magnet pulling you closer or it’s his arms pulling you closer to him, your so called soft kiss turns into a make out, his tongue licking your lower lip and quickly taking the chance to taste your mouth, you barely keep up with his kiss but you manage to.

Your hands make their way up to his chest and neck, your nails digging there softly and tugging on the back of his hair, he softly bites your lip and manages to pull back from the kiss, keeping your lower lip between his teeth while smirking, your hands move down to his big clothed arms that are tensed, you hold tighter for dear life because you’re ready to collapse any second now.

But fuck you want more, you want to feel more of him.

He pulls back from the kiss but your bodies are still touching and pressed against each other, and you stare into his eyes, his smirk getting cockier by the second when he feels you press harder into him, you visibly clear your throat and your hands move to his forearms, his smile slowly disappears when he leans closer to your ear, licking it and printing a soft kiss on it while humming.

He blows some air into the glistening spot he kissed on your ear and whispers. “I think about you when I make myself cum, I wish I could cum on your pretty face and ruin your makeup.”

Chills run through your spine, you’re seconds away from asking him to come home with you, you need him.

You shiver subtly, and you’re pretty sure if he touched you, you’d cum in an embarrassing amount of time.

You look into his eyes, they’re lazy and half closed, he bites on his bottom lip aggressively and pulls back ever so slowly, although the magnet between you feels like it’s pulling you closer.

“Enjoy the rest of your night.” He looks at Jungkook and the rest of the guys, then looks at you one last time before actually leaving the club.

You’re drooling over Kim Namjoon.

“You’re welcome.” Jungkook says.

#namjoon #bts fanfic #kim namjoon #bts smut #bts x reader #namjoon x reader #kim namjoon x reader #kpop smut #kpop fanfic #namjoon smut #bts x you #bts x y/n #bts x fem!reader

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wrathful--artist · 1 year

Text

The Caged Bird and The Chased Mouse

Part 1! \/

Okay so this idea wont leave me, genshin Sagau, classic isekai imposter scenario, but you didnt do the main sumeru story quest yet (like i did on my account, I did everything else, except the story when it came out). I’m so sorry if I mess up characterization, spelling, or general writing structure, I don’t write often.

WARNING FOR: Swearing (F-word and thats it)

So let me set the scene:

You have been isekai’ d into the Genshin world and you’re the creator but its an imposter situation. You’ve been to every other region and have been chased out, betrayed by characters you love and trust. You venture into Sumeru, with an idea of the layout but no clue of what will come next when you step into Sumeru City.

You walk into Sumeru City, amazed by the architecture in person but wary of what might happen if people catch a glimpse of your face. You wander around, just listening to conversations and seeing what foods they have to offer, eventually ending up near the Academiya. You consider if you want to set foot into the daunting structure, considering it looks guarded well and if something went wrong you’d be in the deepest trouble, unsure how the Archon of the region would react to you (poorly you assume). But against your best judgement you start walking in, far too curious for your own good. You get a handful of steps into the building until you run into who looks like a playable character, one you haven’t met before but vaguely remember from the leaks. With grey hair and skin tight shirt, look at you with suspicious, I mean who wouldn’t be suspicious of someone in a cloak that you can’t see their face.

“….” He stares at you with an intense gaze, as if we can see right through your disguise, you’re hoping he can’t actually do that.

“Well it seems we have a newcomer, hello there.” He finally speaks, “My akasha doesn’t seem to know who you are, are you new to Sumeru?”

‘Akasha?’ You think, regretting the fact you didn’t play the story quests before getting sent here. You stay silent, unsure how to respond.

“Are you, or are you not? I’d like an answer or else i’m afraid I’ll have to call the guards.” He adds the last part, to add pressure to you.

“Yes, yes! I’m new to Sumeru and I thought I might take a look at the illustrious Aca- uhm, Academiya!” You mess up on the last part, nearly forgetting the name of the building you’re in.

The grey hair man gives a hum in acknowledgment, but doesn’t give any indication that he fully believes you. You’re getting more nervous as the pause stretches on and curse at your idiotic curiosity, you’re praying to whatever higher being thats left in Tevyat to have this guy to let you go. He starts to circle you, taking in your outfit and body language.

“Alright, well, do make sure you don’t cause too much of distraction, the students need their focus.” He finally breaks his silence and gets out of your way. You let out the biggest breath out in relief, the guy absolutely catches it but you don’t care enough at the moment while your body pumps adrenaline. You debate with yourself if you actually want to continue in self or just run out, but decide it’d look far more suspicious to just run out after that exchange. You give a nod to him and start walking to the main door, you’re able to see some books so you assume you’re walking into a library.

Once you enter room and get near the middle, you’re in awe of how large the room is, how high the books reach, and just how many books are crammed in one room. You imagine you could start reading and wouldn’t finish all the books in the library by the time you die. You start walking around the room, with an odd feeling as you walk around, as if someone was watching you, but you brush it off as someone took notice of the weirdo walking through their space. Once you finish that you start your walk out of the Academiya, entirely done of it’s stuffy feeling that you’d mostly ignored.

As you walked out your foot catches a ledge making you fall to the floor, with your hood pulling back enough to show your face, you yelp.

You catch yourself before your face makes contact with the floor, not taking notice that the hood had fallen back. People started to look where the noise came from and stare in shock at seeing the creator’s- no, the Imposters face. You notice the attention on you and reach up to the hood, and pale when you realize what had happened.

You book it.

You run back into the Akademiya, with a vague idea of an escape ruin, you take left and start running up the wooden ramp. You can hear calls of “GET THEM” behind you, thats starting to gain on you. You run through the almost maze-like path with your feet pounding on the stone with students looking at you with bewilderment. Your cloak flipping behind you as you start to get closer to the top, with your ripped clothes underneath showcasing your struggles from the other three Nations.

You reach the top and jump forward, avoiding the spears of guards and get to the large green door, unsure of what’s behind but hoping, hoping to the fake stars above that it’s a safe place. You struggle to get it open but get yourself in and quickly slam the doors shut. You can hear pounding but it doesn’t seem like the door is going to open, you slowly step away and turn around to assess the room you’ve entered. As you look to the orb in the middle to walk forward to get a better look of what seemed to be inside-

Oh your stars.

That’s a fucking child.

What the fuck.

You stare in shock at the little girl seemingly trapped in a green orb in a large empty room. She’s looking at you.

You start walking even closer, she follows the movement. She isn’t scared or mad or venomous, she just watches. You try reaching your hand up to touch her prison, only then realizing that it was too high up for you to touch. She seems to understand what you want to do and touches the wall of her prison, a ghost of a hand touch. You sit down after a few minutes of starring at each other, and yawn. You havent slept in a while due to circumstances, so you lay your head down knowing that any second they could come and get you but honestly, you just wanted a rest and get away from this new reality you’ve found yourself in. You drift off and all you hear is..

“Everything will be okay.”

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Okay so,, i really hope people like this, this was just my thought to the screen and I’m very willing to make a part two!

I also added a doodle because i done know thought it’d add to the story

#sagau impostor au #sagau x reader #genshin impact sagau #genshin sagau #sagau angst #genshin impact #genshin fanfic #x reader #art #fanart #procreate

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makeitastrength · 5 months

Note

You knew this was coming... what are your fave Chenford scenes? (Same deal, 1 per season, and only 1 honorable mention allowed!). Good luuuuuuck 😘

I did. I knew it was coming, and I can't even yell at you for the evil question because I'm the one who started it. Although actually, once I got started, it didn't take me that long. Somehow this one was easier than choosing my favorite episodes.

Season 1

I gotta go with the same scene you chose here, and that's the 1x20 separated-by-a-wall scene. It's intense, it's emotional, it's vulnerable, and it really illustrates how far these two have come in just six months. Despite the literal and metaphorical wall between them in this scene, it's a lot less of a barrier than it was on day one.

Honorable mention

I've always had such a soft spot for the scene in 1x13 with Tim and Lucy and the woman with the embryos. It's the way he says "But doing this? It won't put your marriage back together, okay? Nothing will. But you will come to hate yourself if you go through with this." Every time, I flash back to 1x07 and Lucy saying "I came here to remind you that you'll regret helping her. Because it's not gonna change her. But it'll sure as hell change you." And just... THE GROWTH! Look at this man learning from his own experiences and using that to talk this woman down. It's such an underrated moment and I love it so much.

Season 2

This season was SO HARD because there are SO MANY good chenford scenes. But truthfully, the end of 2x12 has always been my favorite. In just this one scene we see Lucy struggling with her recovery, we see Tim struggling to find a way to support her through her recovery, and then we see him finding the exact words she needs to hear and ultimately pulling a smile and an almost-laugh out of her despite the tears in her eyes. They're both so raw and vulnerable and I'm pretty sure this is my favorite chenford scene of all time.

Honorable mention

It was a close call here between the hospital scene in 2x11 and the ending of 2x02, but ultimately I have to go with the latter. I mean... she called Isabel to ask about his learning style??? And then she stayed up all night to record a whole ass audio book for him??? And then she helps him see it as a strength??? This man has ALWAYS been worth the effort for her and he's only just barely beginning to comprehend that.

Season 3

Season 2 was so hard to narrow down and now here I am in season 3 with the opposite problem. Not that I dislike season 3. I'm just realizing that my favorite chenford scenes aren't really in this season. I guess I gotta go with the wedding scene in 3x14 because like, excuse me you two, you are blatantly checking each other out and you are IN PUBLIC. Absolutely zero subtlety, just elevator eyes and sass and so much flirting.

Honorable mention

I debated between two parking garage scenes here... the end of 3x01 and the end of 3x09. Ultimately I'm going with the end of 3x01, because we all know Tim will go above and beyond his job description to help her and protect her, even if he refuses to take credit for it. And this scene really just shows that she's always been worth the effort for him as well.

Season 4

Probably to no one's surprise, it's the hug in 4x09. Hands down. The vulnerability on display here breaks my heart every time. It's the first time we see Tim really, truly allowing himself to fall apart. I will never be over the way he just sinks into her and lets her hold him together. This is my favorite of their hugs, and seeing the tears in Tim's eyes brings tears to my eyes every single time.

Honorable mention

I waffled back and forth for quite a while between the hug in 4x01 and the kiss in 4x22, but ultimately I had to go with the kiss because it's just such a great scene for so many reasons. I mean, THE KISS, obviously. But also, the awkwardness beforehand, and Tim being so adorably proud of himself, and the absolute disaster they both are in the aftermath. Tim's flustered "You know what? I don't have anything," is one of his best lines ever. And don't even get me started on him standing in the hallway as all the feelings slam into him at once. SO. GOOD.

Season 5

Picking right up from that honorable mention, I gotta go with the hand hold/airplane kiss scene from 5x01 as my favorite (and yes, I'm counting that all as one scene because it's continuous even though I'm sure it was filmed separately). From Tim "if your head isn't 100% in the game it'll get you killed" Bradford reaching up to grab her hand in a way that is definitely breaking character to their completely unnecessary (and very hot) airplane bathroom kiss that I have watched on repeat approximately 12984367 times. These two protect and ground each other in a way no one else can, no matter the situation.

Honorable mention

I... don't know. There are so many. I'm honestly so torn between the scenes in 5x19, 5x20, and 5x21 because there's so much emotion. Clearly I have a thing for moments of vulnerability, and we see those in spades here with Tim's shooting, and then the fear after the shoutout in 5x21 and the complex emotions associated with Lucy working undercover. 5x20 and 5x21 especially are really just digging up so much of Tim's trauma and I think it's pretty clear this is something they're both afraid to face head on. That's not really an answer. Can we count that as an answer?

Actually no, now that I've looked through the gifs I have a real answer. It's the end of 5x21. There's something just so human about Tim searching for meaning in what he went through with Isabel. And the way he hugs her with his hand on her neck gets me every time.

#asked and answered #favorite scenes #chenford #lucy chen #tim bradford #the rookie #chenford chats

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idontknowreallywhy · 7 months

Text

Estera - Ch 16 - Distraction

Developments develop. John lives to regret his eldest brother befriending his AI daughter. But can bagels ever be bad?

TW for sickness. This remains the only part of this entire story that could be viewed as a self-insert as I drafted it in my head when I too was curled up on the bathroom floor… Estera is much braver than I was though.

Apologies if these are coming somewhat thick and fast… figured I’d get as much as I can posted while the muse cooperates and before something shiny breaks the current hyper-fixation I have on this story 😏

(Previous… Prologue - Stars are Only Visible in Darkness, Estera - 1 - Colour, 2 - Dinosaur, 3 - Shoes, 4 - Thunderbird, 5 - Lesson, 6 - Safe, 7 - Gull, 8 - Deliver, 9 - Coffee, 10 - Flight, 11 - Run, 12 - Fall, 13 - Trying, 14 - Hide, 15 - Wait)

(Sofasurf’s Recrudescence which is the foundation for all of this)

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Slumped in the corner of the bathroom, cold sweat prickling from every pore she pressed her face against the coolness of the tiles and willed away the nausea.

She did NOT. Have. Time. For. This.

It was obviously an occupational hazard of spending every working day with small children, but she often seemed to dodge the viruses that took down her colleagues and had always been secretly pleased by the fact she was able to invincibly swoop in and cover for them when required. Pride before a fall.

It was particularly embarrassing as she’d been back at work a mere 3 days after so much time off. Just tomorrow and Friday left before the holidays… she COULDN’T call in sick it was just too ridiculous. Somehow she had to power through.

This particular bug seemed determined not to be ignored, however. Another wave of sickness hit and left her curled in a tight ball, sobbing into her best quality bath towel.

Too much self pity, Estera, need to think of something else…

Her feverish mind supplied only Baby Shark on loop.

Which didn’t really help.

Groaning in frustration she reached for her mobile phone, maybe she could find distraction of some kind online. Not that anyone she knew was likely to be awake at this time.

Oh, there was just one, according to the little green dot next to the word Blue.

As always her brain warred with itself - the anticipation of the warm, safe feeling their silly little exchanges always brought versus the sharp bite of guilt that demanded to know why she had any kind of right to his time or attention after what she had done. After the pain she’d caused him.

The nausea rolled by again, threatening to drag her into despair. She gritted her teeth. Desperate times… maybe he wouldn’t mind sharing another daft joke or something…

Hi, you’re up late?

Hey there 😀 no it’s mid-afternoon here ☀️

Oh! Sorry, I actually have no idea where you live and shouldn’t have assumed.

Not a problem, we tend to keep it quiet for security so I wouldn’t have mentioned where we are.

You ARE up late though? Everything alright?

Well she should have seen that coming. Fever made her honest. Or at least had eliminated her ability to formulate a plausible lie.

“Just a bit of a sickness bug, caught it from the kids.”

Ugh, that’s the worst. You want company? I can be there in half an hour?

She blinked. He was joking, surely?

Ha, err no I’m good thanks. That’s pretty fast though!

Told you One was the best Thunderbird 😉

She laughed out loud at the reference to the passionate debate in the cave. Which triggered another bout of unpleasantness. She lay on the floor for a while waiting for her head to stop pounding.

A soft ping made her open her eyes again.

You ok?

Sorry, yes. Just… well, you know.

Don’t apologise. Just wish I could help.

I could do with some distraction.

Want to hear about how our pool got filled with jello?

You have a pool? 😲

And yes please

WELL

It started (as it often does) with Gordon (2nd youngest) winding up Alan (youngest)

I never figured out precisely what it was about but that rarely matters…

She focussed on allowing herself to relax and to be carried away by the tale. He was an engaging story teller although she was sure much of it must be exaggerated - surely no real people would take a prank war to such extremes.

He asked about Italy so she found herself telling him about her family, her nieces’ exploits and how she’d got herself completely lost on the day trip to Venice.

She even admitted the trip took place when it did because she had been signed off work - fever really did make her too honest.

She didn’t say why. He didn’t ask. But the ball of tension that had resided in her throat for weeks eased, just a little.

She talked about Bez. He told her about his family, their different skills and interests and how proud of them all he was. He shared more dad jokes. She informed him they were terrible.

An hour or so later, having been chivvied to finally send the email to the school office, she crawled back into bed and a thankfully dreamless sleep took her.

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She woke with a start to the sound of the doorbell and Bez skittering about excitedly in the hallway. 10am - was it someone from school checking she was really ill? Staggering on jelly legs to the door she cautiously cracked it open.

“Delivery for Miss Herz… Herma…zew…” the courier frowned and held out a large brown paper bag.

“That would be me. Err thanks.”

Leaning heavily on the closed door she gently pushed Bez’s enthusiastic head out of the bag. In fairness to him it was emitting quite a pleasant aroma. Which turned out to be chicken soup and plain toasted bagels from a deli in town. she recognised the name of the place but it was far too fancy for her to have ever darkened the door. A bottle of isotonic drink and a range of herbal teabags were also included along with a printed note reading only “Get well soon, S x”

Well that was… unexpected. And kind.

Bez was beginning to lose his mind so she poured half the soup into his bowl and curled up on the sofa. She nibbled at a piece of fancy bagel… it really was excellent and probably wasted on her somewhat battered palate. She picked up her phone to send a thank you message, trying to calculate what the time difference must be when suddenly she froze and the bagel fell from her hand to immediately be wolfed down by her delighted dog.

How had he known her address?

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“John?”

“Yes EOS?”

“What kind of bagel flies?”

John ducked, concerned that the AI might be regressing back to old tricks. His immediate vicinity remained airborne-bread-product free, however.

“I’m sorry?”

“A plain bagel.”

“What?”

“It is a pun. I have deliberately exploited the fact that there are two meanings of the word plane for comedic effect. It is funny.”

Silence reigned.

“John?”

He lifted his head from his hands and sighed. “Yes EOS?”

“Why aren’t you laughing?”

“I was distracted by plotting my eldest brother’s demise.”

“He mentioned that you might initially react with threats of violence to his person and advised that persistence is generally the key to good comedy. What do ghosts put on their bagels?”

John flinched unwillingly and tried to cover it by playing along.

“I don’t know EOS, what do ghosts put on their bagels?”

“Scream cheese. This one is another play on words because although it isn’t precisely the same phoneme the sound is very similar.”

“I get it EOS.”

“You still aren’t laughing, John. Should I continue with the persistence strategy? Or perhaps I should carry out further research?”

“The latter I think.”

There was a pause.

“John, whilst we are discussing bagels, I believe you would enjoy a trip to the South West of England.”

John looked up from the weather front he was monitoring and frowned as he tried to predict the punchline to this one.

“Why is that EOS?”

“This deli claims to produce the most delicious bagels in Europe.”

“Good to know. What brought that to your attention?”

“Scott asked me to research the best place to order from in that locality.”

John noted the dropping of the surname from her habitual reference to his family members. Thus far, only he had been on first name only terms with his AI. It seemed his big brother had been upgraded too.

“He did, did he?” John paused, wondering whether further enquiry was overstepping a boundary. Maybe it was a little, but Scott had been acting weirdly and as a caring brother John should keep an eye on him.

“Did he say why?”

“We sent a ‘care package’ to a friend.” EOS enunciated the new phrase carefully.

John’s eyebrows defied his attempt to maintain a poker face. Turning away from EOS’s camera track he opened a private line to Virgil.

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Hey how are you doing? Hope you managed to get some sleep?

She typed and deleted three variants of a reply, then buried the phone under a cushion and curled up on the couch with her head on Bez’s flank. The dog huffed in his sleep.

She had eaten the rest of the food. She wasn’t insane - it was delicious and probably eye-wateringly expensive - and she didn’t have the energy to prepare herself anything else. It really was a thoughtful gesture and she had to say thank you. Should have done already.

But the initial glow of warmth at the thought she had a friend out there somewhere who cared had been swamped by the creepy feeling. She wasn’t listed in the directory. Never had been. There had never seemed any point as who would look her up and it would only result in sales calls or junk mail. And advertising her surname might invite the attention of the unpleasant minority with a particular political statement to make.

The “It’s over now, why are you still here?” type of statement. Best avoided.

So how had he got it?

She thought again of his immediate offer of company, which had seemed sweet if rather silly at the time.

What if there was an ulterior motive?

She shivered and had to focus to push back certain memories that still lurked too close to the edge of her consciousness.

Don’t be ridiculous. The man had the entire world at his feet. And she was literally being sick at the time. Hardly attractive to someone thinking in that way. She thought back to the time they had had coffee… no… he didn’t seem like that kind of a person. He’d seemed… surprisingly genuine. The occasional text exchanges they’d had since then had backed up that initial impression. And last night in all that time messaging her, keeping her company, there were no red flags at all, she’d even felt maybe he was someone she could trust… could actually talk to.

Aaaaaah which meant he was just being nice and she hadn’t responded! Being wary, even cynical was one thing, but she couldn’t bear to be rude. She grabbed the phone but found herself hesitating again. Maybe she could just ask about the address and if he was weird about it let him down gently and delete his number and hide. Yes, hide from the guy who could buy her entire town if the fancy took him. Right. That would definitely work.

"Damnit Scott Tracy, you’d better not be a weirdo stalker."

Bez looked up sleepily.

“Sorry, Bez, didn’t mean to say that out loud.

Right. Ok. Thank you message.

She added a smiley face to make it seem less flat and reread it again.

And then again. It would have to do.

She pressed send.

Hi, I seem to be ok now just really drained. Thank you for the soup, it was just what I needed. 🙂

Glad to hear it. Make sure you keep hydrated and get plenty of rest

I get the impression you say that kind of thing a lot?

Ha. Yeah I’ve 4 little brothers. We’ve seen our fair share of stomach flu.

Seriously though, the hydration thing…

She eyed her empty glass. He had a point actually.

I am literally getting up to refill my drink now

Good 🥃

That was the wrong emoji, I do not recommend whisky at this time!

Estera leant heavily on the side of the sink, sipping water and trying to calculate whether she could take more tablets for the throbbing headache yet. No, not quite. She eyed the phone on the table. Ah, it was no good, she had to ask or she’d be driven to madness by overthinking.

Can I ask you something?

Of course!

Fire away

How do you know my address?

The little ticks turned green and she waited for the completely normal and un-terrifying response that was obviously coming.

Except it didn’t. After ten minutes, she stopped watching the unchanging screen and hid the phone in a drawer. Being unable to see it didn’t help in the slightest. Checking it again showed no change. She slammed the drawer closed.

She crawled into the shower and sat motionless under the flow of water, trying to work out how on earth she could afford to quit her job, move home and change her name.

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#thunderbirds are go #thunderbirds #thunderbirds fanfiction #Estera #tb estera #scott tracy #john tracy #EOS (thunderbirds)#The Commander & The Murderbot #EOS’s continuing adventures in the art of Humour #tw vomit

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mlmxreader · 1 year

Text

Break Me Gently | John Soap MacTavish x gn!reader

anonymous asked: "There's no chairs left." "You can sit on my lap"with soap please?

summary: it's a tough time to say goodbye to someone that you love, even harder when it's the very last time.

tws: swearing

support your fanfic writers by reblogging what you read & enjoy

It wasn't often that Soap was actually home for more than two seconds; the smell of his cologne lingering practically everywhere, he had freshly painted the furniture with it now that he was home and he knew that the scent had been fading.

But to him, home meant something so much more than just a lingering scent that stuck to the furniture. For Soap, home had meant absolutely everything; he was in his own bed, he could sit on his own sofa and in his own chair, he could stay in bed until the soft hours of the early afternoon and eat what he pleased and when he wanted to.

Being home always meant everything to Soap, and he always fought to make the most of it when he could; that never stopped him from regretting the fact that he would have to leave and his time with you would come to an end. Soap never liked to leave, and he always wished that he could stay until the end of the line, he always wanted to be there with you and at your side.

But the sun was kind today, as he scratched at his eyebrow and he sighed, lazils licking his lips as he watched you; Soap always knew that you looked your best as you did then. Disheveled, wearing just boxers and a single sock, folding and putting away the washing as you hummed to yourself; you smelled so much like him, he could only ever smell it when he hadn't been home for a while.

You never looked so good, and he knew it; he didn't have the heart to say it, though, that he was destined to leave yet again and he had a sinking feeling that it would be the last time. It never felt that way before, his stomach never sank and his heart never pounded in his chest and his lip never quivered. It never felt like the last time before.

He couldn't help it, his eyes starting to tear up as he took in a deep breath and tried to hold the tears back; he knew that it wouldn't be long, that he would have to be honest and tell you the truth. The last thing that Soap wanted was to be honest and to tell the truth when he was certain that it would be the very last time he would ever say goodbye.

Sighing, Soap dared to sit up with the blanket pooling in his lap and the soft warm air hitting his bare skin; he nearly didn't open his stupid mouth, chewing at the inside of his lip as he debated whether or not to actually say anything. He didn't want to destroy it, your own happiness with how you were just glad to be so near him all the time; he knew it would kill you to know that he was bound to leave you, that he was bound to leave.

Soap didn't want to abandon you, he didn't want to hurt you and to cause you any sort of upset. But he knew that he would end up doing exactly that, as much as he fucking despised the thought; maybe he could let you down easily, maybe he could break you gently if he just tried hard enough. He sighed again, and reached for the bottle of irn bru that sat on the bedside table.

"Can we talk?"

You turned around, nodding as you hummed softly. "Yeah, always."

Soap frowned, nearly pouting as he ran a hand through his hair and tilted his head to the side. "I, uh... shite. I gotta leave."

You swallowed thickly, throat becoming clogged and your mouth going raw and dry as you struggled to force the words out. "What?"

"I need to leave," he said, voice breaking. "Today's... today's my last day."

Your legs felt weak, like you were about to collapse and break the laminate with your knees, covering your mouth with your hand as you sniffled. "Baby? I... I need to sit down."

He nodded slowly. "Are you thinkin' what I am?"

You nodded back, sniffling. "Baby, there's no chairs left."

"You can sit on my lap," his voice quivered as he gestured for you to get near him.

It was a running joke between the both of you, and had been for years; his colleagues had found out about your relationship when he had offered his lap for you to sit on after you had complained about there not being any at an office party. Now, it was a sad reminder of much more simple and easy times; now it was a sad reminder that he had to leave you. He had to abandon you.

Holding you against his body, Soap pressed his face against that spot just below your throat, spilling hot and wet murky tears on your shirt as he quietly sobbed against you; you held onto him tightly, tugging harshly at his hair in a desperate attempt to make sure that he wouldn't leave. Your tears were wetting his hair something awful, but the growing wet spot on your shirt was more than evening things out.

"I don't wanna go," Soap hoarsely murmured.

You clenched your jaw, and nodded. "I don't want you to go... don't leave me, Johnny, please..."

He grabbed the back of your shirt, knuckles turning white and clicking loudly as he sniffled and choked out a harsh sob; he didn't want to let you go whatsoever, he didn't want to leave you. He knew it would be the last time, he knew that he was going to leave you in a cold and cruel world, all alone. He hated it.

Soap despised and loathed the thought that he was going to leave you all alone and abandon you, he just wished that somehow, someway, there was a way that he could let you down easier and break you gently.

More than anything, Soap wished that he could have broken you gently.

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marie-swriting · 1 year

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The Memories Of Our Relationship - Shawn Mendes

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Superache Masterlist

Summary : You finally start moving on from your relationship with Shawn, but he decided to come at your place in the middle of the night.

Warnings : angst, sad ending, Shawn is drunk, maybe some grammatical mistakes as English is not my first language, tell me if you see some or if I missed any warnings.

Word Count : 1.7k

French version on Wattpad

French version on Tumblr

Song inspiration : Memories by Conan Gray

The sound of your doorbell drags you out of bed. You blink your eyes quickly before rubbing them and looking at the time on your phone. You’re wondering who could be at your place at two in the morning. You sigh, annoyed before getting out of your room and walking to the door. You look through the peephole and see Shawn, a sad expression on his face and his hair wet from the rain. You hadn’t seen each other for the past two months, since your breakup. You have no idea why he’s here. You hesitate before opening to him, concerned you’re making a mistake. After debating with yourself mentally, you decide to give him a chance. After all, he wouldn’t be here if he didn’t have a good reason. As soon as you open the door, Shawn stumbles into your apartment. You roll your eyes and close behind him, already reconsidering your decision.

“What are you doing here ?” You ask him while he stays in the middle of your living room.

“I want to talk to you.” He announces before taking his wet coat off and putting it on the coat rack.

“It’s two AM, Shawn.”

“I know but I need to.” Shawn insists and you realise his voice is a bit different.

“Are you drunk ?”

“No, I just drank one glass.” He denies, but you know him.

“Look, just say what you wanna tell me quickly, I have to wake up tomorrow. I mean, in five hours.”

“I… I want us to get back together.”

When you hear his sentence, the fatigue officially leaves your body. You raise your eyebrows and you hope you misheard. You rub your temples, closing your eyes for a second. When you open them again, you can see the seriousness on his face.

“You’re the one who wanted to break up.” You retort before playing with your butterfly pendant hanging down your neck.

“I know, and I regret it.”

“It’s a bit too late now.”

He doesn’t listen to you and starts walking in your living room, looking around. His eyes are full of nostalgia while he reminisces about your relationship. You look at him from afar, not knowing what to do. His inebriated state doesn’t help you to make him aware of the situation. At one point, he stops and takes an object on your living room table. Even if you don’t see it, you know what he took. You trot toward him and remove the book from his hands.

“You still have our photo album ?” He asks with a stupid smile on his face. “I thought you’d have thrown it away by now.”

“Tonight is the first time I looked at it since our breakup, actually.”

“So you admit it, you miss what we had as well.”

“I never said that.” You affirm gripping on the book a bit harder.

“So why did you take it out after all this time ?”

“I don’t really know. I… I suppose I wanted to see if I could look at the pictures without breaking down.”, you explain and before he can smile, you quickly add, “which I can.”

Shawn doesn’t say anything, not convinced by your answer. He starts strolling around again before going to your kitchen. He pours himself a glass of water. He drinks it in one gulp, then he puts it in the dishwasher. You join him again, more and more annoyed by his behaviour. You wish he’d finally leave you alone, especially because you need to rest. You cross your arms over your chest before taking a determined tone.

“Why are you here, Shawn ?”

“I told you, I want us to get back together. I shouldn’t have let you go. I was an idiot.”

“You wanted it because of the distance and your job it was too complicated.”

“But you, you didn’t want it.” He retorts and you look away for a second. “You wanted to find a solution to make things work. And I was so sure I was right I didn’t listen to your arguments, like a moron. I should have. I don’t want to lose you. Without you, I’m nothing. Please, let me fix my stupid mistake.” He begs, trying to take your hand.

“Shawn, stop it.”, your order as you take a step back, “I’m finally moving on, I don’t need to hear you say that.”

“But deep down, you still love me.”

“Of course.”, you state as if it was obvious, “You’ll always have a special place in my heart, but it doesn’t mean we should be together again.”

“Why not ?”

“Love is not always enough. It didn’t work once, a second time wouldn’t be any better. Trust me, I haven’t stopped thinking about it for the last two months. I’ve imagined every scenario and there’s no happy ending for us. If you hadn’t broken up with me, we would have done it later. We were already falling out of love so our relationship was going to have an end, at some point.”

“We could stay friends ? I still want to be a part of your life.” He proposes with an ounce of hope and you’re trying not to give in.

“We can’t. It wouldn’t be a good thing, because we’d prevent each other from moving on with someone else. It’s better if we don’t talk anymore.” You tell him, your hands playing with your necklace.

“Y/N, please.”

“Oh my God, listen to me for once in your life !”, you lose your temper running your hand on your face, “I don’t want to. I was fine with the memories of our relationship. Of course when you left me, I was devastated and mad at you. I even thought I’d always have memories of you where I’d hate you, but then I realised you were right from the beginning. I have good memories of you, of us and you’re currently ruining everything. So stop it. You were perfect when you were just in my memories. I didn’t need to see you tonight, especially if you were gonna say that. I’ll always have affection for you, but it is over.”

Shawn simply nods with teary eyes while you breath heavily. You know you just broke his heart, but you need to protect yours. You had to be straight with him. You don’t like being the cause of his pain, but you don’t have any other choice. He doesn’t answer you, understanding it’s a lost cause. He leaves the room while you’re getting a grip on yourself. You breathe many times before finding back Shawn in your living room, asleep on your couch. Frustrated, you sigh, but decide to not wake him up. His drunkenness won’t allow you to make him get out of your house easily anyway and you don’t want him to drive and be the reason for an accident.

You leave him a glass of water and some medicine before taking a blanket. As you put it on him, Shawn opens his eyes for a moment. He looks at you as you’re leaning in above him and his eyes find your necklace, making him smile foolishly.

“You’re still wearing it.”

You don’t have the time to open your mouth because he falls back asleep right away. You look at him one last time and go back to your bedroom. You roll over in your bed for a bit as you think back at your discussion with Shawn. You wipe some tears on your cheek before finally being able to fall back asleep.

When your alarm goes off three hours later, you’re mad at Shawn for cutting your sleep short. You struggle to get out of bed, but you force yourself to get dressed for work. When you’re ready, you go to your living room after taking a box that has been lying in your closet around the past two months. You put it next to the couch and shake Shawn. He needs a minute to surface. When he sees you, he can’t help but have a smile on his face. For him, he’s back to the beginning of your relationship, where everything was well, where you were happy together. But your neutral expression brings him back to reality. He sits down before taking the glass of water and the medicine he just saw. When he’s done, he stands up in front of you. You point at the box before speaking.

“These are your stuff. I think there is a coat, books and CDs. I wasn’t able to give them back to you before”, you inform and he stays silent, “you can take them back.” You insist.

“You weren’t joking when you were saying you wanted our relationship to stay only memories.” Shawn says laughing to hide his pain.

“If I want to move on, I don’t have any other choice. Oh, there’s that, too.” You say, removing your necklace.

“No, Y/N, you can keep it. It belongs to you and you only.”

“I know, but I feel like as long as I’ll have it, I won’t be able to grieve our love story and I don’t want to throw it away, so take it.” You clarify, handing the jewel.

“If it’s what you want.” He murmurs, taking it.

Shawn looks at the necklace, admiring the silver butterfly. Your attempt at your first kiss had been interrupted by the appearance of the insect with beautiful blue wings. You had laughed before being able to finally kiss. The butterfly had quickly become your symbol. You love this necklace. You always touch it whenever you’re feeling a negative emotion. But you can’t keep wearing it.

Shawn puts it in the box carefully. He takes the box before walking to the door. You open it for him and he starts leaving, his head down. You’re about to close the door when he turns around one last time.

“I’m sorry about last night. I shouldn’t have come. You’re right.”, he admits before taking a deep breath, “You’ll also always have a special place in my heart. I love you.”

You wish you could say it back, but the words stay stuck in your throat because it’s not the thing to say. Deep down, you know it. So you smile at him sadly before closing the door symbolising the end of the chapter of the story with Shawn.

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{This is my side blog so I'll be answering comments under the username @marie-sworld}

#marie swriting in english #marie swriting with conan gray #marie swriting with music #marie swriting with superache #shawn mendes one shot #shawn mendes x you #shawn mendes x reader #celebrities one shot #shawn mendes x y/n #shawn mendes #shawn mendes imagine #shawn mendes x fem reader #shawn mendes x female reader #shawn mendes fanfic #shawn mendes angst #Spotify

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4dtk · 2 years

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a/n: 1.2k. post defection geto, manga spoilers, a little angst, reader also believes in geto’s flawed vision. inspired by above the chinese restaurant by laufey ♡

“(y/n)-san! (y/n)-san!” the girls’ shouts cut through you and suguru’s conversation, and your lover turns to them with an amused smile — about to speak up about something along the lines of interrupting the ‘grown ups when they’re talking’ — but mimiko and nanako doesn’t care one bit, not when they’re finding out about a new dessert place down the street.

life is simple; that is if you factor out the sorcerers at jujutsu high trying to weed you out and kill you, but among the squeezy apartment above the chinese restaurant and the delicious smell of dumplings, you think that life was well this way, even if it was inconvenient. you still remember the bags under suguru’s eyes, the hair that stuck out of all places, and the regret swirling in geto’s irises when he returned bloodied and frozen.

(“i killed them… my parents. i did i—” it doesn’t take long for geto to break down, because you know that he went through all of that, numb. you hold him all through the night that day.)

“(y/n)-san! did you hear what we said?” nanako tugged on your arm and snaps you out of the daze, showing geto’s phone that displayed the colourful crepe store, albeit upside down. giggling, you flipped it around for her and her twin, ruffling her hair.

“yes, i did, honey,” you’re pleasantly surprised when you glance back up at suguru to find him already smiling at the three of you, fond and satisfied. he looks at you like you’re his saviour. “when do you want us to take you?”

that godforsaken day, seeing two young girls caged like animals made geto snap, it made him question if he was actually protecting the right people. and that night as you hear him explain his vision in hushed tones and passionate words, you still his pacing with warm, hypnotising hands on his cheeks. you pull on his heartstrings with your loyalty and love and he promises that he’ll do everything he can for this little broken family.

and do everything he did.

from sourcing for apartments that were out of range of jujutsu high’s radar, to building twin beds for the girls, to debating desperately over what to name the two. seeing suguru in unexpected fatherhood made you smile to yourself all the time, you didn’t think you’d be this lucky to witness all of it. the chair scrapes across the floor before geto stands up, walking over to your side and feeling his arm snake around your waist along with a kiss to your cheek.

“why would you need a dessert when we have (y/n) right here?”

you roll your eyes and laugh as you push him away, opposed to the girls who just pull disgusted faces at your display of affection.

“geto-sama, we don’t love (y/n)-san the way you do,” nanako speaks up, grabbing your hand and pulling you from the chair so much that you’re forced to sit on the floor between the two girls. they’re getting stronger by the day. “we love (y/n)-san like a parent, right, mimiko?”

mimiko was more reserved than her sister, but she gives her verdict anyway, nodding to her sister’s prompt as she curled into your side silently with a small smile. “yeah.”

the failures of jujutsu high — they would often call you, but you hardly felt like one when you hear the laughter of your boyfriend with the girls. you’d even call it content when you hear them playing tag in the living room or feeding each other noodles at the dining-table-slash-kitchen. the proximity felt loving, the thought of giving them a second chance felt right.

because at least if you had your youth taken from you, it was fair that you made sure that no one took away theirs.

“do you think hell is waiting for us?” you mumble to the other that night after putting the girls to sleep, swallowing nervously at the challenges that would arise before the four of you. it seems like geto understands your anxiety, taking your hand and squeezing it softly. even without looking, it feels like the sky is your shared space of vulnerability and camaraderie.

beside you, suguru takes a deep breath before turning to you and placing his forehead on yours. the moment is tender and soft, and below, you can hear the chinese restaurant winding down and closing shop. it’s the end of the day, supposedly calm and still, but your eyes are blurred from the vision of the girls covered in blood, from the vision of the strangely vivid image of geto clutching his side that’s stained his hands red.

“hey, hey, sweetheart, what’s wrong?” you sniffle, blinking away the tears before your eyes finally lock onto him. they’re downturned and hold the glow of the moon, and you think you can see how his eyes (and him) resemble the floating rock: often wrongly overlooked but striking. you remember how the girls like to pull you along while suguru rests at the back like a tired dad, how they wake you up in the morning and go to sleep in his arms.

they find fun in you and solace in geto.

“nothing— j-just,” you sigh, “i don’t know. i’m just scared.”

geto frowns, hands from your face dipping towards your waist, “will it do you any better if you sit in my lap? hm?”

he’s skillful at using his words, but today he’s a little quieter, settling rather for the feather-like touches of his arms around your middle and the similar kisses upon your jaw. his mouth maps out your skin, a memorisation of something that he can do with his eyes closed, and his embrace tightens when he feels you stifling a smile.

“that’s that smile that i love,” suguru mumbles, finishing his journey and coming to face you again. “i’m scared, too. nothing worries me more than losing the three of you, especially when we’ve only begun this small family.” the word makes you smile, no matter how fucked up it was, but if geto was determined to give you the world, so would you.

“we’re awfully young for a proposal, but i accept it,” you laugh, pecking his forehead. he savours it, eyes closing and breath halted, and when they open again, you think suguru at the end of the day is the most beautiful — it was what he was the epitome of. the opposite of calamity and the jujutsu world, tranquil and undisturbed like the soothing tides of the night’s oceans.

“i love you.” suguru doesn’t think love is a curse at that very moment despite what his classes before at jujutsu high have taught him. your lips are an inch from his, already sensing his contagious smile before he mutters the confession again. it sounds like something forbidden, but it isn’t. “i love you.”

it is geto suguru’s curse to bear even if he falls and indulges and loves too hard, but it’s a curse he will never forget the taste of even if he lives a million lives and dies a million deaths — it will always lead back to you.

geto is a mass murderer and id still defend my little babygirl. anyway this fuckin hurt to write i wanna give him a hug so bad

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mdzs-owns-my-ass-i-guess · 1 year

Text

A series of university events

Here is the ficlet for the winning option on this poll, Jingyi going through some of the funniest moments/situations I experienced as a university student.

All of these did actually happen, believe it or not, either to me personally, or I was there to witness them.

(The last one was a bit adapted to fit the characters and the theme, but I did argue with my group mates over color accents and other such aspects when we did our project, so there is a grain of truth in there!)

I really hope this is actually funny. Enjoy!

It was 7.15 am when Lan Jingyi stepped into his university building and he didn't know whether he found that ironic, hilarious or eerie.

He had promised himself he would not be cutting it so close to Professor Lan's 8 am class anymore (last time he arrived 53 seconds before the lesson began, as per Ouyang Zizhen's cronometer), but 7.15 was way too early.

It just had to be that day that the Public Transportation Gods decided to smile upon him and have him arrive 45 minutes before Teacher Lan's class. The man was probably still home having his coffee, minding his business, while Jingyi was at school, regretting the extra 30 minutes of sleep he lost.

Jingyi walked up to his class, and was surprised to find one of the cleaning ladies struggling to clean up yesterday's mess. She was equally as surprised to see him, and even checked her watch, panicked.

"Young man, you really scared me, I thought I ran out of time!"

"I'm sorry, didn't mean to do that." A sheepish smile as he chose one of the middle seats. "The commute was surprisingly short today."

He took out his phone to scroll on social media for a bit as began to sip at his coffee, but his eyes inevitably caught onto the cleaning lady's pained expression every time she bent down to pick up discarded papers or small pieces of trash.

Jingyi immediately abandoned his phone, walking up to her to help.

"You really don't need to do that, sweetheart, you're here to learn, not to clean!"

But Jingyi only offered her a reassuring smile, placing all the trash he'd collected into the bin. "You guys work so hard for us, so we have a clean place to study. This is nothing."

And so, Jingyi and the cleaning lady worked together for a few more minutes, rearranging desks, dusting and sweeping. Neither seemed to have realized how quickly time passed, until the door swung open to reveal Jin Ling carrying a massive Starbucks drink in one hand and the keys to his car in the other, a backpack hanging off one of his shoulders.

He looked at Jingyi, then at the cleaning lady, and, as the woman thanked him for the help and left, he couldn't help lowering the rim of his sunglasses with a smirk. "Training for your future workplace?"

Jingyi rolled his eyes. "How are you able to walk around with your head so far up your ass?"

"With great ease in designer shoes." Jin Ling replied, taking the seat in front of Jingyi's. "Now how come you're so early?"

"I'm being responsible."

"Yeah, right, and I'm poor. What other lies are we telling?"

Jingyi half debated throwing his hot coffee in Jin Ling's face but decided against it. There were no coffee shops around close enough for him to go get another and return in time for class.

"You ask about me, but why are you so early?"

"I drove dad to work. His license was suspended for speeding and now he's making me drive him around like a fucking chaffeur!"

"You guys shit money. Why isn't he using an uber or something?"

Jin Ling took a long, tired sip of his drink. "He says it's good driving practice for me. And mom won't drive him because she told him if he gets one more speeding ticket, he's on his own."

Jingyi couldn't help a mischevious grin. "So it looks like you're training for your future workplace too!"

------

Lan Jingyi was hungry. He was pretty sure that his whole class was, it was lunch time after all, and you could hear a stomach growling every few seconds.

Thing is, Jingyi did have food. Plenty of it. Because he knew he would be getting hungry, he had 12h of classes back to back, after all, of course he needed to eat.

The problem was that the professor promised them a 15 minute break halfway through the class... and had yet to deliver on that, droning on about some boring lesson that Jingyi couldn't even be bothered to take notes for. He was too hungry to write, and he could always ask Sizhui to fill him in later.

The professor began drawing something on the board but stopped midway through.

"You guys are not paying any attention to me at all. What's going on?"

"We're so hungry, professor!" A female voice responded, and Jingyi was quick to recognize her as Song Qing, the insanely smart girl two years younger than him that got into university on a gifted kid scholarship.

The professor sighed. "Why didn't you guys say so? I'm hungry too, let's eat up so we focus better! Brains don't work on empty stomachs!"

The class blinked at the man, confused for a few seconds as he took out a pink lunch box from his bag. "What, you think I eat your essays for lunch or something?"

Everyone began pulling out their own food, from sandwiches to cakes, snacks, salads and everything in between.

"You have a cute lunch box." Song Qing commented, barely holding back a giggle.

The professor laughed. "My daughter packed my lunch this morning, okay? She said this is her lucky lunch box, and wanted me to have a good day, so she gave it to me."

The class collectively aww'd at that, before returning to their food. Jingyi greedily bit into his chicken sandwich, hoping to God nobody heard him moan with both delight and relief.

"Jingyi, you really need to stop moaning into your food like that." Zizhen commented as he stabbed a cherry tomato from his to go salad with a fork, "It's weird."

"Have a bite of this and you'll get it." Jingyi offered, and Zizhen shrugged, taking him up on it. The moment flavor filled his mouth, his eyes fluttered closed and a low "mm" escaped him.

"See? It's amazing!"

"Will you guys stop orgasming over food?" Jin Ling intervened. "The rest of us want to eat in peace."

"Food orgasms are the best." Jingyi replied before taking another generous bite of his sandwich.

Jin Ling mumbled something, sinking his spoon in his container of hummus, but Jingyi and Zizhen continued to fawn over their food anyway.

---

When Sizhui returned to his dorm room that day, exhausted after a long day of studying in the library, he had not expected to find his roommate, Jingyi, with a flip flop in one hand and a massive can of big spray in the other, looking nothing short of a hunter.

"Jingyi. What the hell."

"There is a massive cockroach hiding around here." Jingyi answers sternly, eyes searching the floors. "And I am going to kill it."

Sizhui sighed, placed his book bag on his bed and wondered whether to join Jingyi in his hunts or just go to bed and leave him be.

But- "Hah! There you are!" was followed by the comical sound of a flip flop hitting the wooden floors, and Sizhui realized that his friend could do very well without him too.

"So." Jingyi began, placing his weaponry down. "How was today?"

"Exhausting. Did you do any studying?"

"No, I hunted the cockroach."

"Jingyi. The final is in two days."

"I couldn't have focused knowing there was a cockroach."

"Teacher Lan is so going to fail you."

Jingyi sent him a pleading, wet dog look. "And you're just gonna let that happen...? After I saved you from that terrible beast just now?"

"I'm taking Zizhen as my roommate next year."

"As if he doesn't mooch off you too!"

"So you agree. You do mooch off me!"

---

It was once again 6 am on a Monday and Jingyi wanted to die. Well, maybe not die, but definitely sleep. Like the dead.

Still, he had to go to class. Sizhui's didn't start until 12, that lucky bastard, so he had to go through the terrible grogginess of his early morning on his own.

He was just about to get into the shower - bless Sizhui for having picked a room with an en-suite bathroom - when he heard the unmistakable sounds of... well, fucking.

They were doing it in the other room, obviously, but the walls had either thinned out over night or his neighbours just happened to be screamers. Either way, Jingyi's already foul mood was not eased by the litany of moans and begs and curses from the other side of the wall - who fucks at 6 am on a Monday, first of all, and second, who does it so damn loudly too?!

He tried to focus on his own washing up routine, tried arguing to himself that, perhaps, he too would do that if he had someone to do it with, and it was a free country, people could fuck anywhere, any time.

But the moment that he began to hear screaming, all that flew out the window and he knocked loudly into the wall, three consecutive times.

The noise stopped for a while after that, and he was gratefully enjoying the silence, only to hear, loud and clear from the other side: "that's why you get no bitches, man!"

It took all Jingyi had not to go down to their door and start a fight.

God, he hates mornings.

---

"You aren't seriously going to pick golden accents." Jingyi said, incredulous. "That's the most cliche, overdone, boring choice!

Jin Ling rolled his eyes. "It's called timeless, you dumbass. A classic."

"Are we really fighting over decorative accents right now?" Sizhui asked, exasperated. "This whole thing is fictional, guys, it's not real! We aren't actually organizing this art gallery!"

And they were not. For one of their classes, the professor wanted them to come up with an event to organize on the basis of the information he gave them, following a strategy and some pre-defined steps. It was meant to test them on their knowledge, as well as show them what event organizing entails and whether they would be up for a career in the field.

"We have to do it right still!" Jingyi argued. "And I won't have fucking golden accents! I know you Jins have gold for breakfast but this is supposed to be fine art!"

"Your ass has never seen gold filigree and it shows! Gold is elegant, subtle. What colors do you want to use, huh? Magenta?!"

Zizhen sighed. "Calm down, you two. Our gallery theme is Cloud Recesses. There are no golden clouds."

"The sun is yellow!" Jin Ling argued.

Jingyi had to intervene. "It's the Cloud Recesses, not the Sun Recesses!"

"And where the fuck do you think the sun is? Not behind clouds?!"

Sizhui sighed quietly, turning to his other friend as the two kept arguing. "Zizhen, what do you think of light blue?"

"Sounds good. White could work too, but an ashen type, we don't want the contrast to be too obvious."

"I'll write that down. Say, how much did our budget add up to?"

"500k."

"Jin Ling." Sizhui called out, just as he was about to send a book Jingyi's way. "Where do we get 500k from? That's how much the event costs."

"We'll sponsor it. We as in Jin Corp. And add Jiang Corp too, jiujiu wouldn't mind and if he does, I'll threaten him that I'll buy out my stocks."

"Fuckin' capitalist." Jingyi glared, "But if we get such rich sponsorship, we should organize an after party too."

"Oh so I'm a fucking capitalist, but then you go around and spend my money?"

"What good is it for if you don't spend it?"

"You know what? Fair."

#mdzs #mo dao zu shi #writing attempts #ljy #lsz #jl #oyzz #somg qing is a qing btw #song lan and xxc adopted her

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malum-forev · 2 years

Text

Game On: Chapter Six

The next day, (Y/N) walked down the stairs and was met with the smell of fresh coffee brewing. She poured herself a cup and followed the faint voice she heard from outside. Through the back door, she found Bucky.

“What the hell are you doing out here?” She asked while closing her cardigan. She found Bucky on the outside porch sitting in a huge metal tub that was most likely filled with freezing water. He quickly waved and put out his finger asking her for a moment.

“Yeah Steve, no worries. You guys just get to somewhere safe, we’ll be here.” He replied before saying a quick: “See you soon bud.”

“Good morning doll, you sleep alright?” He asked.

(Y/N) furrowed her brows. “Will you please tell me why you’re in a vat of water when it’s snowing? You’re going to get sick!”

“It’s nice to see that you care about me.” Bucky smiled as he got out and started to dry off, he walked past her and into the house with the towel draped over his shoulder, exposing his back. “We high performance athletes have to take good care of our Adonis like bodies. Take a good look doll, I’m about to go take a shower.”

“I get that cold water helps with inflammation but do you really have to do it half naked in the snow?” She rolled her eyes and followed him in. “What did Steve say?”

“All these excuses just so you can take a good look at this.” He said pointing towards his carved abdomen.

“At the risk of getting a headache or my eyeballs rolling out of my skull, I will not dignify an answer to that comment. When are they getting in?”

“They’re not.” Bucky simply said while shrugging his shoulders and turning around.

“What do you mean? I have a ten people feast here!” She exclaimed.

“I mean, the roads are too icy and they’re not going to make it.” He didn’t face her.

“This is ridiculous!” She huffed, sitting down at one of the stools.

“Call them over here and make them risk their lives, be my guest.” He smiled and left the room.

“You are insufferable.” She muttered.

“Ditto.”

“Well, when you find the stick that’s up your ass, come down and help me eat all of this food. I don’t want it to go bad.” She grumbled.

Bucky cleared his throat from behind her, (Y/N) was sipping peppermint tea looking out the window.

“It smells pretty good in here.” He smiled.

“I don’t get you most of the time.” She said quietly, not turning to face him.

“You don’t get me? That’s funny.” Bucky chuckled as he poured some of the leftover coffee from the morning. “I don’t get you all of the time.”

“I mean, we were having such a nice time yesterday. And now you wake up being the biggest a-hole ever.” She took a long sip. “You’re always so nice to everyone but with me, it’s like-“

“It’s like with you I can’t mask anything.” He interrupted. “I’m sorry for being a jerk this morning. I just wanted to do something but my stupid teacher said he’s already on break and can’t do anything.”

“Aw, does the scholarship baby want to change his grades?” (Y/N) smirked.

“Actually, I called him to withdraw from the debate.”

(Y/N) stood frozen and slowly closed the drawer, she was about to drop the oven mitts that she had taken out. “What?”

Bucky looked down at the floor and only turned his eyes to her, looking at (Y/N) through his eyelashes. “I want to make it better so, I took a closer look at the rules and it turns out that opponents have to be cleared one week before the debate to be able to compete with the approval of one of the chairmen. If our names are submitted 72 hours before the debate, we need both of your approvals.”

He took one step closer to her. “Look, I know this doesn’t make everything okay, especially not between us but, I want you to know how much I regret it. I truly didn’t think it would be such a big deal. So, after winter break, I am going to go down to the office and tell my professor that I want my win to be annulled. That way, you will have a do over and this time, you better win Doll.”

Her body responded before her head could even conjure up the words. (Y/N) leapt into his arms. “Bucky! You have no idea how much this means to me. Thank you so much!”

Bucky’s smile couldn’t be erased from his face, even when she took a step back and her cheeks turned red.

She tugged at her sleeves. “Just wipe that stupid grin off your face and we’ll be fine.”

“You called me Bucky.” He said quietly.

She furrowed her eyebrows and shook her head. “I don’t think so.”

“I don’t think you’ve ever called me Bucky before.”

She turned around to take the cookies out of the oven, or at least that was what she told herself. She couldn’t face the thought that he had actually made her nervous. “You must be mistaken, James.”

“I kind of like that you don’t call me Bucky, it’s like that name is a persona. And you see right through that. It’s like your eyes have the ability to see right through all of this and into my soul.” He murmured, walking towards her but only to help her close the oven door.

“Well, I think your parents chose such a pretty name for you to be called anything other than James.”

Bucky decided to ignore the tingling feeling he always got when she said his name. “You’re really going the whole nine yards with this Christmas thing.”

(Y/N) let out a sigh as she basked in the beauty in front of her, the perfectly baked tray of gingerbread cookies that would soon become a beautifully decorated house. “Cooking is my escape. That was one of the reasons I nagged the girls for us to get an actual apartment. Not those run-down bedrooms the school decided to call dorms.”

“When I was a kid, my Ma always would bring home the gingerbread houses from the store. My sister’s would always look like it had come out of a book or was part of the props of a movie or something but mine would always be a huge mess. I used to say that a monster had come into town and destroyed mine.” He chuckled.

“The secret is to shave off the sides with a microplane to make everything straight.” (Y/N) smiled before taking a picture.

“Darling, you’re talking to me in another language. But whatever you do or say, don’t stop cause your voice, it’s like a thousand of those baby angels have come down to give me a private concert.”

(Y/N) laughed while swatting his hand away from taking a gingerbread man’s leg. “Cherubs, that’s what they’re called.”

“Whatever their name is, that’s what your voice sounds like to me.” He cheekily said while sneaking a bite.

“You’re a real charmer Barnes.” (Y/N) snorted.

“Only with you doll.” He flashed a grin.

(Y/N) cocked her head to the side and gave him a, incredulous look. “Don’t make me laugh James. Remember, I’ve seen all of the girls that have come and gone.”

“Ah, you keep tabs on me now?”

“Keeping a tab on your love life would be a full-time job. I’m just a simple onlooker.”

“Well, if you had been paying more attention you would have noticed that the ladies come to me. I have no need to charm them.”

“Okay now you’ve truly made me laugh.” (Y/N) said while starting to get the ingredients for the icing ready. “There is not a girl that you haven’t come up to within a 100-mile radius from campus!”

“No girl that matters, that’s for sure. No girl that I’m interested in.” Bucky’s eyes turned a darker shade.

(Y/N) cleared her throat. “Is it too early to drink?” She asked, ignoring the warm feeling taking over her body.

“Do you always need alcohol to feel the things that are so clearly obvious?” He smiled, grabbing his chair, and placing it next to her.

“What are you? My therapist?” She laughed, getting up to clean some of the dishes and to place some distance between them. This quickly failed as he followed suit and grabbed a dishtowel to start drying off what she handed him.

“I can be anything you want me to be.” His child-like smile never leaving.

“You’re actually not licensed for that.” She replied sarcastically.

“I’ve got my class D and motorcycle license, need I more?” Me matched her tone.

“You’re playing with fire, Barnes.” She warned.

With one swift move he placed both of his hands to her sides on the countertop, trapping her. “Lucky for me, I’ve got insurance.”

She couldn’t meet his eyes but her breathing got heavier. She turned her head upwards and left only but an inch of distance between their faces. “I will never do anything, in any circumstances, with you.”

With that said, she ducked underneath his arm and got out. “Never say never.” He replied smugly.

“Trust me Barnes, I will always keep at least five feet of distance from you.”

Bucky clutched the right side of his chest. “Doll, you’re killing me.”

She sat on the couch and turned on the TV. “Don’t you dare touch those cookies!”

“I wouldn’t dream of it.” He replied as he grabbed another piece of the previously mutilated gingerbread man.

A few hours later, Bucky was getting ready to leave the cabin.

“Hey, (Y/N)! I’m thinking of driving into town. You wanna come?” He asked.

“What are you gonna do?” She asked, her eyes not leaving the screen.

“You got something better to do?”

“Well, I was planning on binging a show that’s got 7 seasons.” She smiled.

“C’mon I’ll buy you a coffee or something.” He dangled his car keys in front of her face and she quickly snatched them.

“Only if you let me drive.”

Bucky shook his head. “That is the one thing I can’t do for you doll, that thing out there is way too much car for you.”

“I promise I won’t speed!” She pleaded and he sighed, quickly giving into her demands.

“Do you always get what you want?” Bucky asked as he clipped on his seatbelt.

“Most of the time.” She smiled. “What’s the deal with this car anyways.”

“Well, it was my dad’s in the 80’s but we spent a whole summer fixing this thing three years ago. Press the breaks!” He said nervously.

(Y/N) rolled her eyes and slowly slowed down before parking in two spaces.

“Oh god, you’re one of those people.” Bucky groaned.

“I don’t usually park like this but if I parked any closer to the ram next to us you would’ve had a fit.”

“Let’s get out of here before people realize we’re the idiots that parked like this.” He took her hand in his and dragged her to the coffee shop.

Maybe it was the weather but, (Y/N) didn’t want to let go of his hand. It wasn’t until they got inside that she mustered up the courage to interwind her fingers with his. Once she did this, he started rubbing circles on her hand with his thumb. It had been years since she had let someone hold her hand and the sudden warmth felt like an old song coming into her mind and playing over and over again.

“What are you gonna order?” He hummed as he rested his head on hers.

“Don’t know yet, honey nut latte or something festive.”

“Is honey an ingredient or a term of endearment?” His laugh vibrated through her body, filling her once again with that oh so familiar feeling.

“Ingredient.” She clarified. Bucky would be lying if he said he wasn’t feeling the exact same thing as her but in that moment the only thing that mattered was the now so, he took his hand out of hers and placed it over her shoulders bringing her closer to him. He placed a gentle kiss on the top of her head.

“What was that for?” She asked turning her head up to him. “Are you going to say something about my hair? How it smells? Is it greasy?”

He let out a light chuckle. “No, nothing like that. I just- it just felt right.”

She gave him a curious look but kept smiling. “You look beautiful under these lights.” He whispered as he inched closer to her. (Y/N) bit her bottom lip but it was soon relieved by his thumb, his finger grazed from the side of her jaw to her lip.

“Are you guys ready to order?” The teenager behind the counter interrupted, (Y/N) cleared her throat and walked closer to her, leaving a larger than needed gap between them.

“Is regular milk okay?” The cashier asked after they ordered.

“Oat milk on the honey nut latte please.” Bucky said while taking out his wallet and (Y/N) smiled without saying a word.

“You need any help?” Bucky asked coming into (Y/N)’s peripheral view. “Do you need anyone to help you lick the spatula?”

“I think I’m okay.” She laughed putting the icing in the bag. “Now, it’s time for us to decorate our gingerbread homes.”

“I think I’ll just be over here and watch. I told you, I’m not very good at these things.”

“C’mon, it’s not fun when only one person is doing it.” She whined, placing every ingredient in front of him and sitting in the next spot. “I’ll be your teacher.”

“Okay but when this fails miserably, you don’t get to laugh at my house!” Bucky huffed.

“I promise not to laugh, too much.” She said quietly and got started.

About an hour later, they were finishing. Well she could say she was finished but him on the other hand, he would need about three more hours and a completely different gingerbread kit.

“I told you this would be a mess.” Bucky groaned, picking up one of the sides of the house and trying to balance it on top of some icing.

“You just need to add some flowers to the garden, look, like this!” (Y/N) beamed as she drew on some daisies on.

“This doesn’t make sense, flowers don’t grow in winter.”

“Well, this house is set in a magical land where flowers bloom all year round.” She smiled as she drew a house on his garden.

“And in this fictitious world, you decided daisies are the way to go?”

“Well, I would draw on tulips or blue irises but getting the details on those are pretty hard.”

“Are those your favorites?” He asked, grabbing the piping bag again. She hummed in agreeance.

“I wouldn’t have picked you as a tulip girl.”

“What would you have picked me as? A dead roses kind of gal?” She snorted.

“No, I would never pick roses out for you. They’re too cliché. I would get white lilies, they’re classic but with a twist. I would also make sure to grab some of the lilies that are still closed off, so you could see them open, I think you would like that. Circle of life kind of thing. Maybe some baby’s breath too.” He turned around to look at her.

“You’ve put a lot of thought into this.” She smiled. “For someone who’s never gotten me flowers.”

Bucky scootched closer to her. “I’ve always thought you would throw them in my face if I ever tried to buy you some.”

“Maybe you don’t know me too well.” She said, taking his hand in hers and helping him pipe some of the icing on.

“Maybe I would like to get to know you better.” He whispered, trying to follow her lead but his nervousness got the best of him. He suddenly pressed too hard on the bag and then they heard a pop. (Y/N) couldn’t help but burst out laughing as she saw his face drenched in icing.

“You’ve still got some in your hair.” (Y/N) laughed as she watched Bucky try and get the icing off of his body.

“If the whole law thing doesn’t work, please promise me that you won’t start teaching. I don’t think you’d have a good career there.” He muttered.

“I told you not to press too hard!” She said turning back to the table where her gingerbread house stood beautifully next to the huge mess that was Bucky’s house. “What’s today’s record gonna be?”

“Is Michael Bublé too cheesy?” He asked and took her head shaking as his answer. “How about Ella Fitzgerald?”

“Perfect.” She smiled.

(Y/N) plopped herself down on the couch and basked in the feeling. The fire crackling and Ella’s beautiful voice soothing her. “I can’t imagine how amazing it must’ve been to have this place every Christmas.”

“It was pretty great. My parents don’t really do anything for Christmas and since my sister moved out we don’t really see each other during the holidays.”

(Y/N) caught herself frowning. “Don’t you miss them?”

“Yeah, sure- sometimes. But- I mean- don’t you miss your parents? I think it’s just one of those things, you move out and you stop seeing your family.” Bucky said as he sat down next to her.

“Yeah, I do miss them. What I miss the most is that home feeling. You know what they say, home isn’t a place it’s a sentiment.” She sighed.

Bucky put his arm around her shoulder. “I sometimes feel that way when I’m with you. Maybe it’s your blunt way of talking or it’s that sparkle in your eye but I feel like I’m at home.”

“Stop you’re making me blush.” She laughed sarcastically but it quickly died down once she looked at him. The soft light illuminated his face, his expression turning soft.

“It’s the truth, I’ve told you this before. My soul is completely naked, I’m vulnerable when I’m with you.” He whispered, inching closer to her.

“What are you doing?” She mumbled, (Y/N) felt as if her heart was about to burst.

“What I wanted to do for a long time, and what I should have done yesterday.” He said before bringing his lips closer to hers, an almost invisible distance between them. “Just say the word and I won’t do it.”

Her eyes felt heavy, intoxicated by his scent. She said nothing. He placed his lips to hers, they fit perfectly. He placed his hand on the back of her neck and didn’t let go.

The moment could have gone forever had it not been for the record scratching, it brought them back to reality. (Y/N) almost leapt off of the couch.

“What did you just do!” She yelled, bringing her hand to her mouth. Her lips throbbing.

Bucky stood up and ran his hand through his hair. “You weren’t supposed to do that!” She said.

“Well it’s not like you stopped me!” He spat back. “I wanted to kiss you and you did too!”

“I didn’t!” She shoved her finger in his chest. “This isn’t supposed to happen!”

“Why not! You have to admit there’s something here.” He said pointing to the two of them. “There’s a spark and you know it!”

“There is not a spark! There can’t be one!” She shrieked.

With one step he was close to her again. “Tell me, tell me you don’t want this and I will never say a word. Tell me you don’t feel anything.”

For a second time, she said nothing. “Let go of what’s in here,” he pointed to her head. “and think about what’s in here.” He pointed to her heart.

She took a deep breath and crashed her lips onto his. (Y/N) wrapped her fingers in his hair, taking in the feeling of his soft brown locks and thinking of all the times she had thought of this moment. The thoughts that had been buried inside of her head, in a locked compartment she would only allow herself to access once in a blue moon.

“God I’ve wanted to do this for such a long time.” He said through her lips, his voice muffled.

“Shut up.” She spat back, bringing him closer to her. With her arms wrapped around him, she lead him to the stairs.

“Is this really happening?” He tossed his head back to breath for a second once they were at her door.

“Shut up.” She repeated, opening it, and bringing him in.

“Whatever you say Doll, just don’t stop taking. That voice of yours drives me insane.” He said as he shut the door behind them.

The early morning light seeped through the curtains and shone on (Y/N)’s eyes. She felt Bucky’s arm wrapped around her, she took a breath in and relaxed in his touch. The peaceful moment was soon interrupted by voices and the sound of an engine stopping.

“Bucky!” She said, shaking him. “I think there’s someone outside!”

“Just get some sleep Doll, everything’s fine.” He mumbled with his eyes closed.

“C’mon let’s get inside before my hands start to turn blue!” She heard Natasha’s laugh from outside.

“You need to get out now!” She sputtered, grabbing her cardigan and a pair of pajama pants. She pulled his hand to get him out of bed. “Hurry up!”

“You ready for another round?” He smiled trying to wipe the sleep off of his face.

“Stop that! They’re here!” She snapped as she opened her bedroom door and tossed out his pants. “Get out now!”

Bucky stumbled out of the room naked, quickly grabbing his pants. Unfortunately not quickly enough. As he bent down, he heard the front door open to reveal Natasha, Steve, Wanda, and Sam.

“Good morning?” Wanda said looking at the ceiling. Bucky quickly tried to cover himself with his balled-up clothing.

“Hey Wanda.” He smiled nervously.

“Hey Buck, were you sleepwalking again?” Steve laughed as he placed their luggage down.

“I guess I was.” Bucky smiled and walked sideways into his room.

“Shit!” Was the only thing (Y/N) could say, still inside of her room and watching everything from the crack of her door.

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dragonflight203 · 1 day

Text

Mass Effect 3 replay, post Priority: Geth Dreadnought:

-The bit where you have to warn Raan about the Konesh is odd. The signal is next to her.

I suppose we should assume the War Room is larger than it appears on screen. That would explain why Victus and Wrex apparently can’t hear each other despite being so close.

Yet Raan overhears Tali speaking about how she became an admiral, because consistency has no place here.

-The fighter squadron mission is interesting.

Legion lures you in by emphasizing that their targeting liveships – if they’re destroyed the quarians will lose resources and people.

He emphasizes destroying the servers isn't enough; the geth would just transfer to another server. Instead, you need to interact directly with the server to remove the geth.

He implies that they’ll be killed. He never actually states such.

Legion’s social skills have improved since ME2.

I know people give Legion shit about manipulation, but I fully approve of this – Legion’s in the difficult spot of needing to save his people when everyone around him is hostile. He has to be at the top of his game to save them. Part of that is knowing how to work people.

I’m cutting Tali slack on supporting genocide to save her people. I’ll give Legion some for using manipulation to save his.

-The heretics have allied with the Old Machines again.

Whatever rewriting did, it left some individuality. If it had not, the heretics would not have been able to support the Old Machines a second time.

-Legion, if you go renegade when he asks if you regret rewriting the heretics: We also miscalculated their intent. We regret this error.

Whose intent? The virus used to rewrite the heretics was never intended for them – it was intended for the true geth. Legion was the one who repurposed it, so who is this “their”?

Presumably Legion means the heretics, but they never agreed to being rewritten. They rather vehemently tried to prevent it, in fact. Their intent was to remain themselves; how much of that is let after the rewrite is up to debate.

And “regret” is an interesting word choice; Legion normally denies emotion but regret is one. Perhaps he used it because he had asked Shepard if they had regrets.

-Why was the geth megastructure not protected?

The geth know they’re hated by organics. They were born in blood. They should have had a fleet protecting the megastructure.

I suppose we can assume they did and the quarians bypassed it with their new weapons. Still, that’s something the game should have stated.

-Legion says that the geth reacted so poorly to the quarians’ attack because when every geth dies the geth as a whole lose intelligence.

Yeah, I think most people would respond with panic. And the geth have a solid defense that they were growing dumber with each death.

-Legion, about sacrificing free will for survival by allying with the Reapers: That is evidently an acceptable trade.

The immediate crisis is surviving. Freedom is the next crisis.

The wording also makes it clear that Legion disagrees.

That “consensus” is getting pretty stretched there, Legion.

-Legion says that after he returned to the geth, they planned for war because the Reaper’s arrival was imminent.

Yet the quarians’ blew through their defenses and destroyed the megastructure with ease?

Those new weapons must be very powerful.

-So of course according to Tali they’re completely useless against the Reapers.

I’ll give the game this one: the Reaper upgrades are what allowed the geth to fight back, so it makes sense that the weapons would be useless against the Reapers.

-Aaaan Maleon is thrilled to hear the genophage was cured because it retroactively justifies everything he did.

I hope Shepard wrote a detailed email back explaining that no, he still fucked up royally.

Very realistic, however. Kudos for Bioware.

-Garrus provides a contrast to Tali.

They’ve both been thrust into leadership positions by their people and are coming to terms with it. Both are filled with doubts.

Tali disagrees with her people, but goes along to save them. The other admirals value her skills but tend to run roughshod over her opinions. She feels she’s an admiral in title in name only.

Garrus feels he’s always been a bad turian; he questions bad orders. Now he’s the one giving them and has doubts about if his orders are good. The Palaven Primarch asks him for advice.

They both still have some growing to do, but the seeds are there. They’ll make good leaders.

-Javik conveniently says all the species with “female” representatives were considered attractive in his cycle. Quarians (Tali), asari (Liara)… Notably not salarians (Mordin), turians (Garrus), or krogans (Wrex).

I suspect he’s bullshitting for his own amusement.

I also suspect that the writers did not think that far, but that’s a discussion for a different day.

-Javik believes synthetics know that their creators are flawed and have no reason to exist because organics do not know why they do. Ergo, synthetics cannot be trusted.

I can see him where he’s coming from, but it feels like a stretch. Just because something is flawed or purposeless doesn’t mean it’s worthless; that’s Javik’s own projection.

-I wonder if Javik’s psychic touch is one of the reasons he’s so anti-synthetic?

Javik can learn a lot about a person by touching them.

Is this ability perhaps more limited with synthetics?

We know it works on objects – hence the memory shard and Prothean Beacons.

But maybe something with synthetics causes it to be off, and that’s one of the reasons why Javik so vehemently rejects the idea of synthetics as people. Something along the lines that Javik can read the machine’s body but not its memory.

There’s nothing in the game to back this up, but it’s an idea I’d like to explore.

-Javik: The perfection of the machine, or the chaos of the organic.

Good line.

Also highlights how Javik seems to hold the ability of machines highly even as he rejects them. He emphasizes how they’re immortal, how they have a purpose, how organics are more limited.

Then he keeps telling you to throw Legion out the airlock because he’s too dangerous.

-Cortez conveniently tells you that the Geth Fighter has already been sent to Hackett, letting you know that ME3 will not have any vehicle missions.

#mass effect #mass effect 3 #mass effect 3 replay

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daily-cookie-masterson · 3 months

Text

The Argument - A YDKJ x Vs. Void Crossover Fanfiction

Notes: I’ve been thinking about how A.C. Void and Cookie would be friends… And so, I decided to write a fanfiction of them arguing about something stupid. I need a break from drawing but I still need to update this silly little account, so here we are!

This is simply a funny fanfiction I wrote out of boredom, so don’t take it too seriously please!! Thank you and hopefully you enjoy this fic :]

Tags: You Don’t Know Jack, Vs. Void, AC Void, Cookie Masterson, Crossover Fic, Cookie and Void are friends (i guess), Cookie uses Any/All pronouns, This fic is not meant to be taken seriously, Arguing, The ‘Is a Hot Dog a Sandwich?’ Debate, Author Has Some Regrets, Cursing

It was a normal day in Chicago.

It was a slow day at You Don’t Know Jack Studios, so everybody was pretty much relaxing and enjoying themselves. The host of You Don’t Know Jack, Cookie, was simply scrolling through his phone in his office, while his friend Void (If you could even call him that…) was sitting next to him, thinking deeply about something.

It was… Surprisingly peaceful. The two weren’t really talking to each other at the moment, just doing their own thing. In fact, the only audible sound was the air conditioner going off in Cookie’s office.

Well, that was until Void finally decided to break the silence.

“Y’know what, Cookie? I think I can finally say this without questioning it,” Void said in a confident tone.

Cookie didn’t stop scrolling through her phone, but she did look at Void when he spoke.

“Hmm? What are you talking about?” Cookie questioned.

“I’m just gonna hurry up and say it—I think that a hotdog should qualify as a sandwich.”

Cookie’s head immediately shot up at this comment, making them face Void directly.

“W-What??” Cookie sputtered.

He couldn’t process what Void just said. It was illogical! It was insane! It was unbelievably stupid! Cookie began to feel that his head started hurting trying to even remotely understand why Void said that.

“I said what I said. A hotdog should qualify as a sandwich.” Void continued.

“No, you see— A hotdog is a fucking hotdog. Not a sandwich, Void.” Cookie rebutted in a condescending tone.

“Okay, but by definition, isn’t a sandwich a food that has two slices of bread and ingredients in between?”

“Well, yeah but—”

“See that? You just agreed with me. A hot dog is a sandwich, is it not?”

“No, before you interrupted me, I was going to say that sandwiches have multiple components in them. A hotdog has only the fucking hotdog—”

“Don’t hotdogs have toppings on them sometimes?” Void questioned Cookie.

Cookie had to pause for a second before replying.

“W-Where are you going with this—“

“Hotdogs have toppings on them. Ketchup, mustard, relish, cheese, chili… So on, so forth. And guess what? Sandwiches have toppings, too,” Void smugly stated to Cookie.

Cookie was practically flabbergasted.

Did someone just actually prove Cookie wrong? It was totally absurd. Cookie was always right. Well, at least that's what she thinks.

It wasn’t normal for Cookie to be proved wrong… It was so confusing that it almost physically hurt her. Well, that was until she thought of something…

“B-But, aren’t sandwiches supposed to be vertical??” Cookie desperately countered.

Void just gave Cookie a doubting look as a response. But after doing that, Void then started to think about it for a second.

“Okay… But, with that logic, subs aren’t sandwiches either, aren’t they?” Void smugly stated to Cookie. “I bet you would hate having to admit that, wouldn’t you?”

Cookie just sighed heavily at Void’s smugness.

“Y’know what— Fine. I’ll admit it— Not all sandwiches are vertical. I guess… But, I will say this— Have you ever even seen a sandwich store sell hot dogs before, Void?” Cookie confidently stated.

“Now that I think about it, no, I haven’t—”

“So hot dogs aren’t sandwiches!” Cookie insisted.

Void just scoffed at Cookie’s desperate attempts at proving him wrong.

“No Cookie, sandwich stores don’t refuse to sell hot dogs because hot dogs aren’t sandwiches— Sandwich stores refuse to sell hot dogs because they’re just a bunch of cowards.”

Cookie just looked at Void with a look of pure annoyance. They then pinched their eyebrows together out of frustration.

“Goddamnit, Void… Okay, how about this— A sandwich has two pieces of bread. A hotdog has a bun. One. Singular. Bun.” Cookie exhaustedly countered. “And by the way— I don’t wanna hear you say ‘With that logic, a burger isn’t a sandwich’ because a burger has two pieces of bread.”

Void’s eyes widened out of surprise. He then turned around away from Cookie to try and hide his very visible anger. His ego had just been terribly damaged and needed time to recover.

“Stupid freaking gameshow host… Thinking that he’s better than me…” Void angrily muttered under his breath.

Cookie was actually surprised to see Void like this. Usually, Void would just brush things off when someone hurt his feelings, but seeing Void getting frustrated over a petty argument was… interesting to say the least.

“What’s the matter, Void? Can’t handle being wrong, can you?” Cookie snarked.

“Shut up.” Void suddenly fumed. “A hot dog is still a sandwich, by the way.”

Cookie just chuckled at Void’s ridiculous comment. “Yeah yeah, sure it is…”

#cookie masterson #ydkj #you dont know jack #you don’t know jack #jackbox #jackbox games #ac void #a.c. void #a.c void #vs void #vs. void #void fnf #fnf void #ac void fnf #cookie writing #( this is so stupid /not neg )#( this was fun to write tho )

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pesterloglog · 6 months

Text

Dave Strider, Dirk Strider

Act 6, page 7917-7922

DAVE: damn

DAVE: and i thought our houses were pointlessly tall before

DAVE: it just doesnt stop from keep constantly getting more and more vertically enormous

DIRK: Shit is downright precipitous at this point.

DIRK: Like, upways.

DAVE: haha yeah

DAVE: we made sure as fuck not to come right out and literally describe that building as tall

DIRK: Hell yes.

DIRK: Who needs small and serviceable adjectives when the most ass-backwards way of saying a thing is right there, tantalizingly hidden within the vast ocean of language.

DIRK: Like a treasure in a huge shitty clam.

DAVE: we are way on the same page philosophically here

DIRK: Who is surprised by this?

DIRK: Zero people, is who.

DAVE: sounds like a club for losers to me

DAVE: theyre lucky they dont have any members, otherwise theyd all be lame as hell

DIRK: Yeah.

DAVE: so uh

DAVE: why do the houses need to be so tall again

DAVE: i never actually understood that

DAVE: except to reach the gates but once we all figured out how to fly and shit that became so pointless

DIRK: Yeah. After a while in the game, building kind of stopped mattering.

DIRK: Except near the end. Getting them to the top is just a point of completion.

DIRK: Then you dump the grist rig on top of it, apparently.

DIRK: That lets the thing spray out all the grist from the hoard in the planet's core, kind of like a huge oil derrick I guess.

DAVE: oh

DAVE: how do you know this

DAVE: do you guys have like a manual or

DIRK: I'm in communication with Arquiusprite.

DIRK: He's working on it now.

DAVE: so youre in communication with him like...

DAVE: RIGHT now?

DIRK: Yes.

DIRK: Via my shades.

DIRK: Which he incidentally used to be.

DIRK: Like, as a computer, which he lived inside as my Auto-Responder.

DAVE: right

DAVE: and

DAVE: uh

DAVE: why... did you make that thing again

DAVE: not that you ever told me before

DAVE: 'again' is just like a stammering tack-on to that sentence so as to try and not sound too fucking rude

DIRK: I don't think it's a rude question. It's perfectly fair to wonder what was going through my head when I made him.

DIRK: I've spent a lot of time wondering about that myself.

DAVE: so you just

DAVE: straight up programmed a copy of your brain

DIRK: There was some programming involved, but also a bit of cheating, through the mapping of a captchalogued ghost-imprint of my brain.

DIRK: I guess part of it was just about trying to understand myself.

DIRK: But I don't think I would have put it that way at the time. For a while I insisted he was meant to be a "debate partner" or some horseshit.

DIRK: I was pretty young, and had some stupid ideas.

DIRK: About irony in particular. But also a lot of mostly faux-intellectual thoughts on a wide variety of topics.

DIRK: Like philosophy, consciousness, programming, identity, history, ancient pop-culture... really it ran the full gamut of pretension.

DIRK: Not that I don't still find that stuff interesting. I'd just like to think I'm somewhat less full of shit about it all now.

DAVE: yeah me too

DAVE: i mean, about my interests and stuff

DIRK: Creating him was an interesting exercise I guess, but over the years I came to see his development as one of my biggest mistakes.

DIRK: He sort of turned into a monster. But I could never bring myself to get rid of him, or even really blame him for being an asshole, because he wasn't actually that different from me.

DIRK: Like, by definition.

DIRK: He seems alright as Arquius though. At least it keeps him busy, obsessing over his muscles, asking for milk and shit like that.

DAVE: hmm

DAVE: i guess i started some projects i regretted

DAVE: but nothin like making a milk weirdo eventually exist

DAVE: it sounds fucked up but is also kind of an awesome story in its own way

DIRK: I guess so.

DAVE: maybe im lucky i was never that good with computers

DAVE: now computer ART thats a different story

DAVE: ok it actually isnt i fuckin suck at that too

DAVE: but dammit i try my best and make some magic happen at least in my own mind so maybe thats good enough

DIRK: It certainly worked out for you in my universe.

DAVE: yeah

DAVE: i mean

DAVE: i DID captchalogue my own ghost brain once but i didnt know what to make of that and thought it was kinda weird so that never really went anywhere

DAVE: probably for the best

DIRK: It definitely is.

DIRK: Tinkering with your own mind, or identity or whatever... it's a dark road to go down.

DIRK: There are enough splinters of everyone running around out there as it is, just as a natural byproduct of our reality. For me in particular. Probably for you too, as a time player.

DIRK: That process doesn't need to be encouraged or fucked with.

DAVE: for real

DAVE: my bro did cool things with computers too

DAVE: i mean nothin like making a clone of his brain or anything thank god

DAVE: just some absurd bullshit with web bots and stuff mostly to help prop up his various "enterprises"

DIRK: You mean the porn stuff?

DAVE: yeah

DAVE: but with puppets of course

DAVE: it was always about the puppets

DIRK: Naturally.

DAVE: he made all these porn bots that would just talk to each other in a chatroom endlessly

DAVE: all like gettin each other riled up about squishy bottoms and whatnot

DAVE: actually it was pretty entertaining to watch them go at it for hours

DAVE: i think they may have been teetering on the threshold of SOMETHING resembling self awareness?

DAVE: except they only seemed to apply that faculty to reach even more heightened states of sexual excitement for a bunch of nude soft puppets

DIRK: That sounds...

DIRK: Oddly rewarding.

DIRK: I mean, not to say he wasn't still a douche.

DIRK: But as a pastime, cultivating a group of earnest, erotic puppet-loving chatbots sounds so much more relaxing than painstakingly constructing a version of your own brain, and then arguing with it for years thereafter.

DIRK: Almost like tending to a little flock of pigeons.

DAVE: yeah you know he did some cool things

DAVE: it wasnt necessarily all inherently terrible

DAVE: things i would really appreciate under better circumstances

DAVE: he definitely had a lot of drive and also some uh "ideas" that warranted a certain amount of respect i guess

DAVE: he just

DAVE: maybe should not have been allowed near a child?

DAVE: sall im sayin

DIRK: Sounds about right.

DIRK: We really don't have to talk about him anymore though, if it is going to stir up more bad shit for you.

DAVE: nah im alright

DAVE: i think that is all mostly out of my system

DAVE: i mean not forever because i dont think thats how things work

DAVE: i just mean my venting fit is over and im probably good for another 16 years or so and i can return to being mostly deadpan and rad

DIRK: Ok.

DIRK: Well, in sixteen years, if you need someone to vent to again, let me know.

DAVE: sure

DAVE: assuming we havent been killed by like 10 jacks before that i will

DAVE: you certainly seem to be the right guy for that

DIRK: For what?

DAVE: i mean like the most suitable recipient of my hysterical fits on that particular subject

DAVE: there is no way i would ever tell karkat all that

DAVE: i mean maybe some stuff but not ALL the stuff its just too heavy

DAVE: i certainly wasnt gonna mention the stuff to rose or john or jade or whoever else

DAVE: if i was ever gonna do one of my patented acrobatic pirouettes off that particular handle to anyone it really only could have been at him

DAVE: except he was dead

DAVE: and even if he wasnt and i did say all that shit

DAVE: theres no way it would have resulted in anything resembling reconciliation

DAVE: which i think

DAVE: was something i kinda needed

DAVE: but didnt realize it

DAVE: so....

DAVE: thank you for being a really plausible stand in for him who i could rip to shreds??

DAVE: while still being basically innocent of all that terrible garbage

DAVE: so you end up sorta being like an avatar for him that is much easier to forgive

DAVE: i mean

DAVE: maybe FORGIVE isnt the right word because im not sure he deserves that and anyway it doesnt matter because hes been dead for years and at this point is just an irrelevant deceased weirdo who doesnt matter anymore

DAVE: i guess i mean coming around to a place where i dont have to feel rotten all the time anymore

DAVE: and i guess im lucky i got to blunder into a reality that just happened to have the exact right version of a dude which made that possible for me

DAVE: sorry this fuckin ramble is really getting away from me

DAVE: i have no idea if im making sense anymore

DIRK: I think I get it.

DIRK: And sure.

DIRK: You're welcome for me existing.

DAVE: hey can that be like

DAVE: the motto on our family crest

DIRK: I think it already is.

DAVE: all that melodramatic sadbabble aside

DAVE: i think its perfectly cool if youre still curious about your adult self

DAVE: and i dont mind tellin you more stuff about him if you want

DAVE: i know im still wondering about what my adult self got up to

DIRK: Yeah.

DIRK: Well like I said, any time you want to know more, feel free to ask.

DAVE: kay how about

DAVE: we do this thing

DAVE: when i met roxy we did a thing

DIRK: A thing?

DAVE: yeah

DAVE: its called the lightning round

DIRK: That does sound like a Roxy thing.

DIRK: Does it by any chance involve asking a rapid-fire series of questions, some of which end up being a bit too personal or invasive?

DAVE: well yeah when she does it

DAVE: we could be chill though

DAVE: when it comes to asking about each others secret crushes and shit

DIRK: Then I guess I will disclaim in advance that I don't have any, and I don't care about yours even if you do.

DAVE: it is settled then on the fact that we are a couple of cool dudes who know where to draw the line on certain topics

DIRK: Cool.

DIRK: So how do we start.

DIRK: Whose lightning round is this, mine or yours?

DAVE: it can be yours go ahead shoot

DIRK: Ok.

DIRK: How...

DIRK: Did...

DIRK: He, um,

DIRK: Come to "adopt" you?

DAVE: i was a baby and i came down to earth on a meteor while riding a pony with a pink heart on its ass

DAVE: he found me in a crater on top of a dead pony and gave me a lil baby pair of shades that look exactly like the ones youre wearin now

DIRK: I see.

DIRK: So you decided to ditch those shades for the aviator glasses?

DAVE: yeah

DAVE: years ago john got me these for my bday

DAVE: it might have been like an "ironic dare" to wear them i dont remember

DAVE: but when i got em i was like hell yeah im wearing these

DAVE: gonna rock these fuckers til the end of time

DAVE: they were ben stillers

DAVE: like literally

DAVE: they actually touched his weird sort of gaunt face in one of his films

DIRK: Wait...

DIRK: THE Stiller?

DAVE: yeah

DIRK: Incredible.

DIRK: Also, such a shame what happened to that poor man.

DAVE: wait what happened to him

DIRK: I can tell you when it's your lightning round.

DIRK: Or mine. Whatever. I'm still not sure whose lightning round it is when you're the one asking questions.

DAVE: dunno ask roxy

DIRK: Ok. Anyway, didn't mean to interrupt.

DAVE: but yeah we would send each other stuff sometimes

DAVE: me and john

DAVE: well we all would

DAVE: usually absurd birthday packages and such

DIRK: We did that too.

DIRK: Except I had to send things through time.

DIRK: Always had to figure out stuff small enough to send through the sendificator, even if it was piece by piece.

DAVE: nice

DAVE: one time it turned out we ACCIDENTALLY sent presents through time

DAVE: i mean not literally, more in a roundabout way

DAVE: we all sent john a rabbit

DAVE: but all three rabbits just turned out to be the same damn rabbit

DAVE: because of stupid time shit

DIRK: Once I deliberately and quite literally sent a rabbit through time.

DIRK: It was a robot.

DAVE: wow

DIRK: He was a loyal friend to Jane. I don't know what happened to him though.

DAVE: yeah i dunno what happened to johns rabbits either

DAVE: rabbits am i right

DIRK: I hear you, man.

DAVE: what next

DIRK: Hm.

DIRK: You say he owned Cal as well?

DAVE: yep

DIRK: Did he come down to Earth on a meteor with Cal too?

DAVE: i think so

DAVE: that was a long time ago

DAVE: kinda weird to imagine him strutting around with that puppet as a kid in the 80s

DAVE: or maybe just kinda funny actually

DAVE: he sure held on to it a long time

DAVE: must have gotten attached at a really early age and just never let go

DAVE: i guess you fell to earth with one of those things too?

DIRK: Yeah.

DIRK: But if I came to Earth on a meteor the same way you all did, then I guess I just got dunked right in the fucking ocean.

DIRK: Which makes sense. One of my earliest memories is of using Cal as a flotation device.

DIRK: So he sorta saved my life in a way. I guess I bonded with him too, the way your bro did, even if that sounds a bit stupid.

DIRK: Then again, it didn't help matters much that I lived alone in the middle of the ocean. He was my only real life friend. I mean, until I built some new ones.

DAVE: hmm wait we fucked up

DAVE: i asked you a question its not my turn

DAVE: keep firing

DIRK: Ok.

DIRK: How did your bro die?

DAVE: he died fighting one of these jacks

DAVE: at this point i almost forget which one

DAVE: no wait

DAVE: ok yeah it was the omnipotent dog one

DAVE: the jack from our session

DAVE: he was fighting like a lesser form of him and then jack got extra prototyped by dog powers and then got outmatched and stabbed with his own sword

DAVE: pretty sure davesprite was fighting with him and almost died too but then it turned out he didnt

DAVE: but now im at least 99% sure that davesprite is DEFINITELY dead and wont suddenly reappear as a stupid surprise or anything

DIRK: I hate stupid surprises.

DAVE: word

DIRK: So, you said he "trained" you.

DIRK: I'm guessing that means he knew what was coming?

DIRK: Or, some things about your future, at least?

DAVE: seems that way

DAVE: not sure what he knew or how he knew it

DAVE: all our guardians seemed to know bits and pieces of stuff and did vague mysterious things to prepare

DAVE: to this day i have no idea if he was training me to fight lord english or if he even knew who that guy was on any conscious level

DAVE: or it was more like general purpose training to be able to survive some hard shit after the end of the world happened

DAVE: youd have to ask him but thats impossible

DAVE: i do know he managed to get the drop on a meteor before i entered the game

DIRK: What?

DAVE: as far as i can tell he stood on top of it and split it in half with his sword

DIRK: Um,

DIRK: Not to be too much of a wet blanket on that rad as fuck anecdote, but that sounds kind of far fetched.

DAVE: yeah it does doesnt it

DAVE: but then again so does a baby getting dunked from space in the ocean then floating on a weird doll and then growin up by himself with no adults around

DIRK: That's not far fetched. It was pretty straightforward.

DIRK: I think I just found a building poking out of the water, climbed up, then I just started foraging for food in there like a feral infant.

DIRK: Supplies which I'm sure your adult self must have left behind for me, seeing as he clearly must have known some things about the future too.

DIRK: Speaking of which, maybe it's your turn now?

DAVE: yeah ok

DAVE: questions about me hmm lets see

DAVE: ok FIRST the fuck of all

DAVE: what happened to ben stiller

DIRK: He was deemed a heretic, and was crucified on the Washington Monument by some clowns.

DAVE: wow

DIRK: Due to his dedication to freedom and peace, he came to be seen as a martyr, and then a holy figure.

DIRK: He was left on the monument as an example to all, but thousands of faithful gathered below to gaze up at his pious, sort of gaunt face.

DIRK: For years thereafter, his followers would carve stone busts of him in his memory, capturing the piercing glare of his final expression.

DIRK: But they were all smashed to pieces by the presidential church.

DIRK: That religious movement didn't last very long.

DIRK: Rumor has it the batterwitch had a lot of experience crushing righteous insurrections.

DAVE: did my adult self get pissed about stiller

DAVE: i bet he got pissed

DIRK: Yeah. There was a whole series of final insults that led to his active rebellion, instead of just producing subversive media.

DIRK: At one point, the witch "remastered" all of his films to clean up all the shitty artifacts, and released them in stunning high-def quality all over the world, using a rational business model and everything.

DIRK: That REALLY set him off.

DAVE: what the fuck

DAVE: how fucking dare that woman

DAVE: so then he tried to kill the batterwitch right

DAVE: who is the same exact alien as the condesce in this session??

DIRK: Yes. Same one.

DIRK: And yeah, he teamed up with Rose from the same era.

DIRK: They supposedly put up a good fight, but both died.

DAVE: so...

DAVE: does john know that he is literally about to go fight betty crocker yet or what

DIRK: I have no idea.

DIRK: I really don't know John at all, or any of your friends.

DIRK: I know Jane was the heiress to the Crocker brand. Uh, obviously? It is her name after all.

DIRK: Was John the heir to that empire in his universe?

DAVE: nah

DAVE: i mean not to my or his knowledge

DAVE: he just fuckin hated that company for some reason

DAVE: i think his reason was literally as mundane as just being slightly overexposed to cake

DAVE: thats classic john though he doesnt get pissed about anything except for the absolute dumbest shit

DAVE: but i guess his instincts were right in this case

DAVE: maybe we should just

DAVE: not tell him

DAVE: that hes fightin crocker i think the poor dude has probably had enough mental breakdowns for one adventure

DAVE: we all have

DIRK: I'd like to get to know him.

DIRK: Not to mention Rose and Jade. Would have been nice to hang out and chat, in a circumstance where we weren't supposed to prepare for an imminent deadly struggle.

DAVE: yeah

DAVE: well i guess we could have hung out there a few minutes longer

DAVE: i mean you wouldnt have got much outta jade who is stuck in perma-nap mode

DAVE: just like old times i guess

DIRK: Huh?

DAVE: she used to sleep a lot

DIRK: Ah.

DAVE: but yeah there wasnt much time except for like a bunch of heys and oh nice to meet yous

DAVE: and also i think i would have still been a shitty train wreck socially if we all just hunkered down right then and there for another extensive round of freestyle paltalk

DIRK: Right, I was kind of nervous about lingering there for more than a minute too.

DIRK: Mainly because of Jake.

DIRK: I didn't want to make him uncomfortable.

DIRK: I think I have done enough of that.

DAVE: i guess jake was kinda like your john of the group huh

DAVE: wait that was a pretty dumb observation never mind

DIRK: Nah, sounds about right.

DIRK: Seems like John was your close buddy growing up, and Jake was mine.

DAVE: john and i never really had anything like a falling out

DAVE: except for not talkin to each other for a few years on account of being on a meteor and boat respectively

DAVE: but i guess you two had some buddy troubles or somethin?

DIRK: Yes. A lot of buddy troubles.

DIRK: I vaguely touched on it earlier. I was a really bad influence in his life.

DAVE: what happened

DIRK: A lot of things, that were mostly my fault.

DIRK: Basically, I think I bullied him into dating me.

DIRK: Although I had plenty of "help" from my Auto-Responder.

DIRK: There were a lot of insane plans that he hatched on my behalf.

DIRK: But in fairness, I went along with them.

DIRK: To this day, I can't really tell how much of that bullshit was his doing, and how much was mine, which I've just covered up through denial or selective memory.

DAVE: wait

DAVE: you

DAVE: you dated jake?

DIRK: Yeah.

DIRK: That didn't last long though.

DIRK: It was really lopsided and kind of forced.

DAVE: ...

DAVE: so

DAVE: you

DAVE: ...

DAVE: hmm

DIRK: What?

DAVE: nothing

DAVE: i think were breakin one of the rules here

DAVE: this tangent got too personal

DIRK: Oh yeah.

DIRK: I forgot we weren't doing that.

DIRK: Anyway, carry on. You were asking about adult Dave?

DAVE: yeah

DAVE: so that covers how he died

DAVE: taking a futile stand against some unbeatable foe

DAVE: cant say im too surprised about that cause what else is even new

DAVE: what about his early life though

DAVE: guess i arrived around the same year my bro did in my universe?

DAVE: just came down on the same dead horse i rode in on

DAVE: into a world full of opportunities

DAVE: how did i get started

DIRK: His early life isn't well documented.

DIRK: There's hardly anything to read about him until he broke into show business with a few obscure projects at the turn of the century.

DIRK: It all snowballed from there.

DAVE: i guess the one thing we know for sure is i didnt find a kid in a crater and take him under my wing

DAVE: that was probably for the best

DIRK: Heh.

DAVE: actually maybe its better that most of his story is left to my imagination

DAVE: kinda like how you said you spent a lot of time thinkin about him

DAVE: filling in the gaps of his ridiculous exploits

DIRK: Right.

DIRK: There's certainly a lot of lore to work with.

DIRK: Urban legends and stuff.

DAVE: like what

DAVE: actually wait

DAVE: dont tell me

DAVE: at least not now maybe down the road it would be cool to hear some

DAVE: i think id prefer to fill in the blanks myself for a while

DAVE: really it sounds dope as hell to imagine that sort of blank canvas life

DAVE: dropped on earth as a kid in the 70s or 80s or whatever with no bossy adult to reel me in

DAVE: and just having to figure stuff out

DAVE: especially knowing that many years later it all worked out ok

DAVE: really wonder what i did

DAVE: was i like some homeless eighties ragamuffin???

DAVE: jesus christ that sounds fairly adorable if so

DAVE: maybe i slept in an alley on a bed of rubix cubes and alf merchandise

DAVE: or maybe i offered my old school rap services for food

DIRK: Like, through a shitty cardboard booth?

DIRK: You know, like the one from the fuckin' Charlie Brown comics.

DIRK: "This is what the refrance," FYI.

DAVE: yes exactly

DAVE: this sounds like exactly the life for me

DAVE: what if without a penny to my name and the wind at my back i hopped a boxcar to the big apple

DAVE: because as a dumb child i naively believed thats where they made all the apple juice

DAVE: id be sorely disappointed when i got there but it wouldnt matter because id probably scrape together a living on off off off broadway like...

DAVE: making shitty cartoons

DAVE: on stage

DAVE: and saying

DAVE: you guys

DAVE: this will be SO much funnier once the internet happens TRUST ME

DAVE: then the aristocratic patrons of fine theater just shrug and dump their shillings into my orphan hat

DIRK: It sounds to me like you've been reading up on the urban legends already.

DAVE: hahaha

DAVE: i wonder if he had like

DAVE: friends

DIRK: It sounds like he knew a lot of people, at least later in life.

DAVE: sure

DAVE: i mean im sure he knew rose at some point because obviously they teamed up

DAVE: but as fairly old people?

DAVE: it sounds as though they only knew each other as a result of their notability

DIRK: This seems likely.

DAVE: i mean more like the friends i grew up with

DAVE: he couldnt have grown up with john or jade as friends because they were already old by the time he got there

DAVE: this cool 80s kid fantasy was probably just a lot lonelier than ive been picturing in my sweet daydreams

DAVE: i didnt even have the MAYOR god what a nightmare now that i think about it

DAVE: i wonder if all he cared about was making ludicrous shit and fighting evil pastry moguls

DAVE: do you know if he had any other interests

DIRK: Like what?

DAVE: i dont know

DAVE: did you ever read any urban legends about.....

DAVE: paleontology

DIRK: Paleontology?

DAVE: yes the scientific study of dead shit

DIRK: Not that I recall.

DAVE: hmm

DAVE: i guess he probably didnt do anything with that

DAVE: what a shame

DAVE: maybe he never even got the idea since he had completely different experiences

DAVE: but if i were suddenly dropped back in the 20th century id probably look into it at some point

DAVE: i dunno how though

DAVE: i think it would be mainly like

DAVE: some sort of theraputic interest

DAVE: something relaxing to think about instead of a bunch of ironic and stupidly ambitious objectives

DIRK: Yeah, like the porn bots.

DAVE: yeah exactly

DIRK: Maybe some day, when we're both old men, you can live a quiet life tending to your fossils, and I will do the same with my dear collection of simple-minded chat robots fixated on puppet ass.

DAVE: sounds like the fucking life to me

DIRK: What was the lightning round question this stemmed from again?

DIRK: I forget.

DAVE: dunno

DAVE: maybe were tapering off with the lightning round stuff anyway and its just naturally deteriorating into regular dudechat

DIRK: Maybe.

DIRK: You sure you don't have anything else before we say it's officially deteriorated?

DAVE: k heres a curveball

DAVE: what the fuck are you wearing

DIRK: My prince gear.

DIRK: You know. Leggings, slippers, the poofy asshole pants, a hood with some sort of cloth tiara deal embedded in it.

DIRK: Basic stuff for princes, apparently.

DAVE: huh

DAVE: gotta say

DAVE: some of these god tier ensembles really are...

DAVE: something

DIRK: I thought I hated it at first.

DIRK: But over the couple hours I spent flying back, with time to think about all sorts of stuff...

DIRK: It kinda grew on me.

DIRK: The asshole pants are pretty damn comfortable, so I dunno if I even care how stupid they look.

DIRK: And I *am* kind of an asshole, after all. So who am I to complain.

DAVE: i thought the same thing about my cape outfit at first

DAVE: felt like some bozo from the renaissance festival

DAVE: like maybe i should get on a horse and sing a shitty ballad

DAVE: but then it grew on me pretty quickly

DAVE: hardly ever took it off in three years

DAVE: youre right its comfortable and theyre fuckin magic pajamas or whatever and they start to feel like part of who you are after long enough

DAVE: i mean they are supposed to last you forever right

DAVE: kinda by definition since they come along with immortality

DAVE: maybe part of their magical nature includes this insidious quality where they grow on you

DAVE: or not i dunno maybe this is bullshit and ill just wear some normal person clothes when this is all over

DAVE: what about you are you gonna wear god duds forever

DIRK: Nah. I'm sure I'll wear regular stuff again at some point.

DIRK: If a shirt with a hat on it can be deemed regular.

DAVE: im cool with deeming it as such

DAVE: yeah maybe youre right and we should all stop dressing like tools from an infinite magic slumber party for floundering teens

DAVE: and just look like standard floundering teens

DAVE: some of the getups are pretty out there

DAVE: jakes tho...

DAVE: uh

DAVE: damn??

DIRK: I...

DIRK: Yeah.

DIRK: That page costume.

DIRK: I'd have commented on it, except that would've been casting a stone through a particularly fragile glass wardrobe.

DIRK: So... I just flew away.

DAVE: yeah there was uh

DAVE: some palpable awkwardness there

DIRK: Hm.

DAVE: sorry im still

DAVE: tryin to

DAVE: like

DAVE: wrap my head around

DAVE: ...

DIRK: What?

DAVE: uh

DAVE: dammit

DAVE: ok i guess i might have to break one of our lightning round rules

DAVE: only a little tho

DAVE: i hope

DIRK: About what?

DIRK: The personal stuff?

DAVE: yeah

DIRK: That's fine.

DAVE: ok maybe im not even asking you anything

DAVE: maybe this is just a starting point to ramble to myself

DAVE: on a certain topic

DAVE: i think...

DAVE: there is a SLIGHT chance...

DAVE: i may be the biggest idiot in the world

DIRK: ?

DAVE: when it comes to understanding some things about my bro

DAVE: some pieces i never really put together

DAVE: about him

DAVE: until maybe literally right now

DAVE: which i think makes me an objective dumbass

DIRK: What does this have to do with me and Jake?

DAVE: idk

DAVE: nothin

DAVE: maybe i dont wanna ask you anything about jake

DAVE: maybe ill just keep abiding by the code of basic dude manners on that

DAVE: if i bother skirtin the line of this rule maybe id rather ask you other stuff instead

DIRK: Like what?

DAVE: like

DAVE: um

DAVE: say one of your best friends is a knucklehead you havent seen in three years

DAVE: and unless you use ultra direct and explicit language he just wont put two and two together himself

DAVE: and also say ANOTHER best friend is a girl you feel like you had kind of a special relationship with but you ALSO hadnt seen in three years

DAVE: and shes asleep

DAVE: but at some point shell wake up and youll have to talk to her

DIRK: ...

DAVE: this is dumb im not making any sense

DAVE: lemme start over

DAVE: ok lets say

DAVE: way back whenever

DAVE: howww

DAVE: ...

DAVE: how did you tell your friends

#homestuck #dave strider #dirk strider #homestuck act 6 #page 7917 #page 7918 #page 7919 #page 7920 #page 7921 #page 7922 #homestuck act 6 act 6 #homestuck act 6 act 6 intermission 5

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