#we sadly lost two cookies to me burning them and one to breaking

[j-restlessgeek]

Ahhhhhhhhhhh, we are done, first and so far only batch of käärijä and häärijä cookies :3

Big thanks to @nyx-aira who gave me advice and the idea :3. They are so cute.

I will clean up the edges once they have fully dried :3. I had so much fun making them and for a first time everything am very happy and proud. :3

[chaosangel767]

Business Vs. Pleasure Pt. 2

Fandom: Obey Me

Pairing Lucifer/ MC 

Type: Angst 

Pt. 1 Here

Warning: Swearing 

*****The next Morning***** 

You wake up slowly, a massive headache forming from all the crying last night. You felt like you had been hit by a truck. You locate your DDD to see tons of messages from the night before when the brothers found out you went home sick and Belphie telling them that you were sleeping and to leave you alone. Almost all the brothers personally texted you to make sure you were okay. Lucifer called you a bunch of times too. There was a lot of commotion in the group chat as well.  

House of Lamentation Chat.

Lucifer: Y/n wake up, breakfast 

Beel: Lucifer she wasn’t feeling good last night let her sleep 

Asmo: Y/n what happened? Are you up 

Belphie: Clearly not or she would have responded by now.

Mammon: I’m going to wake her up, it's almost afternoon

Beel: MAMMON LEAVE HER ALONE SHE IS SICK

Lucifer: Mammon I will hang you upside down if you disturb her 

Y/n: I’m up guys, why are you screaming Mammon

Lucifer: hey sweetheart how are you feeling 

Y/n: Like I got hit by a truck, my head is pounding 

Beel: Want me to make you anything?

Lucifer: Take it easy Y/n don’t push yourself to much 

Satan: Lunch will be ready in a couple hours if you feel hungry

Y/n :I’m not hungry right now, maybe I’ll come down for lunch

After confirming you were okay you crawled to the shower and started it. While waiting for the water to warm up you look in the mirror and notice your mark missing on your neck. You shake your head before calling Jack. As soon as he picked up he knew something was wrong, I told him everything that happened last night and he just sighed heavily. He talked to me and offered to make me a new dress so that I didn’t have any memories. I gladly accepted and  sent him pictures from last night that Asmo had taken of me dancing with the brothers. He got me laughing like he always does and encouraged me to keep my head up. I hung up with him and took a shower feeling better now that my emotions were straightened out. I threw on a comfy outfit ( your choice) and noticed that Satan had announced lunch was ready. I walked out of my room and went to the table slipping in the free spot between Asmo and Beel. Lucifer looked up at me and shot me a smile. I attempt a smile back, but it comes out strained. I drop my head in my hands. 

“Y/n would you mind going on a date with me tonight?” Lucifer asked, bringing me out of my daze. I struggle to think of an excuse, not ready to face him.

“She can't, we had a meeting with Simeon and Luke” Beel cut in quickly. I sigh and look to Lucifer.

“Beel is right, I have to head over to Purgatory hall.” I muster my best apologetic smile to Lucifer. 

“Don’t forget we have a spa night planned” Asmo sings to me leaning over and cupping my cheek. “ It will help you relax since you aren’t feeling well” I nodded at him, feeling a little upset that I have to keep smiling.  I stood up from my Lunch and took my plate to the kitchen. 

“You barely ate Sweetheart. Are you sure you don’t want more?” Lucifer asks, catching me as I walk by. I look at him and shook my head, being with him was hurting too much. Beel and Belphie stand up. 

“Ready Y/n we should head over soon if we want to get done before dinner” Beel tells me and I nod. We rinse our plates and Belphie whispers to me

“Let me know if you need anything okay?” I nod back and Belphie heads towards the attic while Beel and I head out of the house. 

“You okay?” Beel asks once we are away from the hall. I shake my head and feel tears start to form. 

“ I have no idea how I am going to make the next 6 months, all I see when I look at him is him pounding a Succubus. It won’t go away.” I said the last few words in a whisper, tears threatening to fall. 

“Wait, why do you see that?” I hear Satan behind us, he was walking behind us to Purgatory hall. I gasp and Beel throws eyebrows at Satan. 

“What are you doing following us?” Beel asks and now its Satan’s turn to raise his eyebrows at us. 

“Solomon and I have to work on a project, so I am going over.” Satan explains. We travel the rest of the way in silence until we walk into Purgatory hall. Simeon and Luke greet us. 

“Y/n how are you feeling, are you okay, did you talk to him?” Luke fires questions at me as he hugs me looking worried. I shake my head and sigh, Simeon takes my coat and Satan looks even more confused. Solomon comes in. 

"Y/n why did Jack call me threatening murder and wanted me to go check on you?" Solomon looked concerned and I look at him sadly, trying not to cry right here.

“Y/n were you really sick last night or did something happen at the dance?” Satan questions me hanging up his coat and glaring at me. 

“Perhaps we should talk about this over something to drink in the living room.” Simeon offers you shoot him a grateful smile and nod. We go to the living room and Simeon and Luke sit with me on a couch while Satan and Beel sit on the other couch. Solomon comes in with some tea and cookies for us and sits in a chair.

“What happened last night Y/n”  Solomon breaks the silence first. Luke takes my hand and rubs circles into it calming me. Taking a sip of my tea I look up and meet everyone's eyes.

“Beel and I went looking for Lucifer last night during the party and found him doing some things with a couple of Succubi. I have some evidence and left without me seeing him. I ran into these two and they stayed with me until Beel and Belphie took me home. My mark kept burning last night too, but when I woke up this morning it was gone.” I explained, my voice starting to crack again. I couldn’t control the tears starting to fall down my face. My neck felt strange without the usual buzz from Lucifer’s mark. Usually when I touched it I could feel his warmth and heartbeat, but now my skin was cool to the touch and was like any other piece of skin. Simeon placed his arms around me and served as my anchor until I could control my emotions. Satan and Solomon looked at me shocked. 

“Y/n are you sure your mark is gone?” Satan asked wide eyed, I nodded and pulled down the shoulder of my shirt showing that the mark was missing. Satan shook his head and swore. He was shaking  trying not to switch to his demon form,  a battle he quickly lost. He got up and was shaking in fury. You get up and wrap your arms around him.

“Satan please calm down, it was my fault for believing him” I quickly try to calm him down and Simeon walks over and places a hand on Satan’s shoulder helping calm him down. Satan calms down slowly and sits back down, fury still prominent in his eyes. You know he cares about you and has proven to be insanely protective of you in the past. You and Simeon sat back down on the couch with Luke.

“How are you feeling now?” he asks, looking worried at me. 

“Drained and betrayed” I replied honestly,Satan looked at me sadly. “It's going to hurt more than normal for some time, your body is also dealing with losing his mark so you will be a lot more tired than usual.” Satan explained, he sighed heavily. “I’m so sorry Y/n, I can’t believe he did this, I wish there is a way to help.” Solomon just sat there and watched what unfolded with sympathetic eyes. After talking for a little bit longer, Solomon and Satan went off to work on their project and you watched movies with Beel, Simeon and Luke. 

Suddenly your phone starts to blow up with texts from Lucifer.

Luci

Luci: Sweetheart are you feeling okay?

Y/n: I’m fine

Luci: Are you sure, something in our bond doesn’t feel right

Luci: What are you doing?

Y/n: We are studying with the angels 

Luci: Why not study with Mammon or me?

Y/n:Simeon  wanted to study with me and Luke made sweets 

so Beel tagged along

Y/n: now excuse me I have work to do

Luci: Do not take that tone with me Y/n 

Y/n: I have stuff to do Lucifer

Luci: Y/N!

Luci: We will talk when you get home 

Y/n: Goodbye Lucifer 

Luci: I love you Y/n 

Y/n: …

5 missed calls from Luci

“Everything okay?” Beel whispered and I shook my head leaning on his shoulder.

“I may have just told Lucifer off, there is going to be hell to pay later” I reply, he groans and took my DDD reading the messages. He shuts off my DDD when Lucifer doesn't stop calling me. We continue to watch movies until Satan comes down from Solomon’s room. 

“I’ve held off Lucifer for as long as possible. We need to go home” Satan informed us. I growl and stand up, Beel stands up a little slower. 

“ If you need a place to get away Y/n you can always stay with us. “ Simeon offered and Luke nodded giving me a hug. I nod at them gratefully

“ I’ll keep that in mind, but for now I am going to  confront a cheater” I told them, putting on my coat and walking out of the dorm with Satan and Beel. While on the way home I filled Satan in on my fight and he snorted at Lucifer getting possessive. 

We walked into the house and it was eerily quiet. I walked into my room with Satan and Beel to see Lucifer sitting on my bed. 

“Beel, Satan please leave.” Lucifer commands rising from my bed. Both brothers look at me and I nod, they turn around and walk out of my room shutting the door. I sigh and look at Lucifer. He closes the gap and grabs my shoulders. 

“How dare you talk to me like that” He growls out, I glare at him and slowly feel anger built up. 

“How dare you cheat on me and act like everything is okay the next day?” I growl back, I saw him visibly tense. 

“ What did you say?” he asks again. I look him dead in the face. 

“You heard me Lucifer” He pinned me against the wall. 

“ DO NOT TALK LIKE THAT!!! I WOULD NEVER” He yells at me. My door flies open and the other brothers come in. 

“Lucifer let her go,” Beel said warningly, and Satan is pissed. Luci released me. 

“I SAW YOU LUCIFER. IT WASN’T ONE BITCH BUT TWO” I yelled back letting my anger finally go. I didn’t care that the other brothers had entered not knowing what was going on. 

“YOU SAW NOTHING!” Lucifer grabbed you again. 

“ I FUCKING SAW YOU, YOU WERE FUCKING ONE BITCH AND KISSING ANOTHER” I yank myself out of his grasp, tears finally spilling over. Lucifer looked at you shocked. 

“What are you talking about human?” Mammon asked me. He and Levi looked so confused, I sigh and decide to tell them what happened. 

“Last night I saw Lucifer cheating on me with 2 succubi.” I filled them in. 

“ Y/n dear that doesn’t sound like Lucifer”  Asmo was quick to defend Lucifer breaking my heart a little. Mammon and Levi quickly agree with him, clearly not believing me. Lucifer smirked at me. 

“Enough Y/n, you need to calm down and tell the truth. You have been cheating on me with Beel.” Lucifer crossed his arms and the brothers all looked at me. I snapped, seeing red and realizing that he was enjoying himself. 

“I have done no such thing” I defend, Lucifer’s eyes go narrow and he transforms into his demon form. He goes to hit me but Beel blocks the hit. Belphie and  Satan transform into their demon form and stand protectively  in front of me. Belphie wraps his arms around me. The other brothers look in shock. Lucifer looked shocked that they would stand up for me. 

“I was there last night Lucifer, I saw you cheating on her. I don’t know why you did it and I don’t care, but you do not hurt her because you couldn’t keep it in your pants.” Beel told him as he released his hand and Lucifer backed up. 

“ Wait, Lucifer is this true?” Asmo asked in doubt, the fact that the twins and Satan are defending you is making them rethink. I decide to tell Lucifer about my mark and then escape to the library before things escalate more.

“You told me you felt something was wrong with our bond, well it's true, funny you just did not realize it.  My mark is fucking gone because you of you. But now i know what it means when my mark burns, you have never been faithful.” I pulled down my shirt revealing the healed spot. Lucifer’s eyes widened and he sits on my bed, clearly dazed by the fact my mark had left and that I found out his secret. I turned and left my room with Satan and the twins. 

I fled to the library and Satan put up his hexes so that no one could enter and made the library soundproof. I sent the group the video of Lucifer cheating just to make sure everyone knows and turned off my DDD. I tried to keep the tears at bay, but eventually they spilled over. The twins pulled me into one of the library nooks and let me cry. Satan looked at me sadly and sat in the nook with us. Beel pulled me onto his lap, Belphie was on one side and Satan as on the other. Satan started to read poems to me and Belphie started to play with my hair. The boys held me until I fell asleep. 

 These three boys and the angels become my anchors the next 6 months, as I heal and finish the exchange program. Luci tried multiple times to get back with me, but I held my ground against his advances. Even Lord Diavolo told him to give up. I had learned my lesson, never mix business and pleasure, even though the lesson came too late. 

[star-spangledstud]

ROAD TRIP

Pairing: Steve Rogers x (female!) reader

Summary: You take the boys on a road trip. Steve has a big surprise.

Warning(s): fluff, an overload of sappy goodness and a snoring Bucky. 

Word count: 3700-ish. 

Just as the sun reaches its peak and the wind sends humid blasts of air through the air-conditioning system, Steve glances in his rear-view mirror for the fifth time in three hours. From a distance, he can barely make out the car that trails behind him along the highway. The shiny black vehicle behind his is surrounded in a cloud of sand much similar to the one that follows his own car, and slightly obscures his view. 

Even though he can hardly make out more than the outline of Sam’s car, his eyes are perfectly capable of inspecting and basking in the glorious view ahead of him. For hours it’s been nothing but sandy panes and distant canyons stretched across the horizon along the mostly deserted highway. It’s an incredible contrast to the busy streets of Brooklyn he’s so used to seeing and for the first time in months, he finds himself able to relax without having to think about missions and lurking alien threats.

He knows it was your idea to take the cross-country road trip with just the four of you, and the only reason why he even agreed to tag along in the first place was exactly that. Steve doesn’t think of himself as a particularly good driver, but with the roads mostly deserted and his best friend right beside him, he feels mostly chilled out, excited even, and he’s glad he came, because the scenery would have been lost on him if he hadn’t.

Speaking of best friends, Bucky is snoring so loud in the passenger’s seat his voice almost completely overtakes the sound of the mellow tones of Mac Demarco’s voice on the radio. Bucky has been fast asleep all morning, and even with the sun shining directly through the halfway opened window and onto his face, he looks extremely peaceful. A tad uncomfortable perhaps in his current position but peaceful, nonetheless. To this day, seeing his best friend content brings a feeling of happiness to Steve’s insides that he can’t quite put his finger on. It brings him a sense of relief that he’d been searching for years.

Even though Steve can barely hear the radio, he does hear the honking coming from behind him seconds after passing by an exit sign. He quickly glances in the mirror again and is immediately greeted with flashing headlights that shine bright, white light into his eyes. He signals back by flashing his taillights a few times in a row, and contemplates whether he should wake Bucky up now or let him sleep until they get off the road, but decides not to wake him until he pulls off the highway into a mostly abandoned parking lot that overlooks a field of cacti and dried grass blinking in the sun.

“Hey sleeping beauty,” Steve says with a cheeky smile while he nudges him gently, “bathroom break.”

Bucky groans and extends his arms above his head, his eyes falling on the gas station in front of the car. He watches an elderly gentleman entering the gas station wearing a cowboy hat and leather boots and rolls his eyes while he opens his door.

He steps out of the car and makes a straight line for the bathrooms, leaving Steve standing with his arm leaning against the burning rooftop of the shiny black vehicle as he waits for you and Sam. Apparently, Bucky is not a morning person, even though it’s technically already way past noon, and hopes his friend gets a coffee before getting back in the car.

Steve smiles brightly when you exit the passenger side, and his smile grows even bigger when you offer him a wave after stretching out your limbs. Sam locks the car and follows you over to where Steve is standing, the two of your engrossed in a discussion about which flavor of Ben & Jerry’s tastes better. Both of your sandal-clad feet drag across the sandy road, gravel rolling beneath your toes and bouncing off into the sea of sand like flying fish while you’re busy trying to convince Sam Chunky Monkey is an awful first choice. Cookie dough is clearly the best flavor.

“Pee break,” you explain when you fall in line with Steve’s step, “Where’s Buck?”

“Pee break. He beat you to the punch,” Steve says, grinning as he watches you enter the shade.

“She had four bottles of water,” Sam explains when you walk ahead of the guys, “your girl is thirsty as hell, my friend.”

He pulls down his sunglasses and winks at Steve, but Steve doesn’t reply. He punches his friend in the arm instead and begins to follow after you as he raises his middle finger in Sam’s general direction. 

He waits for you to finish going to the bathroom by the snack isle, and proceeds to watch you in amusement as you pick out two bags of sour candy and a bag of salt and vinegar chips from the spinning rack. Sam and Bucky are outside pumping gas while the two of you scour the isles of the gas station, picking up bottles of cold water, a watermelon Slurpee for you and more snacks along the way.

Steve takes in your appearance when you take a stand next to him in line. Your skin is glowing, highlighted cheekbones flashing brightly in his direction when you turn your head the other way. The Slurpee you’re sipping on tints your lips a soft shade of red, and your eyes sparkle when you meet his longing gaze.

“You tired of driving yet?” you ask as the two of you get in line for check out.

Steve drapes a heavy, glistening arm over your shoulder and kisses the top of your head. His lips, soft and warm against your skin, still give you goosebumps every time they come in contact with you.

“I wanna ride with you next,” you mumble when he kisses your lips, batting your lashes at him in a way you know he can’t resist. 

It was your idea to ride with Sam in the first place, claiming you wanted to get to know him better while simultaneously allowing Steve and Bucky some quality best friend time. Of course you didn’t know Bucky would be out like a light the entire drive, and you secretly missed the company of your boyfriend already. You couldn’t be happier when he agreed to take the trip with you, and so far it’s exceeded all your expectations and then some. Hell, even Bucky looks like he’s enjoying himself.

“How long before we get to the motel?” He asks when you place everything in your arms on the counter.

“Three hours or so,” you say after greeting the cashier, “there’s a diner on the same street where we can eat.” 

“Hmm,” he kisses your cheek and whips out his credit card before you find yours in your cross-body bag, “my girl’s done her research.” 

“Of course,” you beam when the cashier hands you the bags, “it was my idea after all.” 

Sam gladly trades you for Bucky. According to him, the Ben & Jerry’s discussion brought a cliff between your relationship that can’t possibly be fixed, and he needs time away from you to think about the future of your companionship. You laugh and flip him off as you gather your belongings from the backseat of his car, and skip happily to Steve, who’s leaning against the trunk while he waits for you.

“Forgot my sunglasses,” you say between pecks, “I’ll go get them real quick.” 

But he grabs a hold of your arm before you can turn around and from his back pocket appears a pair of black Ray-Bans. He gently pushes them onto your nose, and ten minutes later, the four of you are back on the road. 

The motel you booked earlier that morning - talk about last minute - is located in an old mining town on the edge of the desert. From the window of the room you share with Steve, you can see the bright neon sign flashing against a background of tumbleweeds and cacti illuminated by the undergoing sun. You plop down onto the king bed, hand rubbing your stomach after the heavy meal the four of you just shared while Steve grabs your overnight bags from the trunk of the car. 

“Come here,” you whine with outstretched grabby hands when he finally shuts the door behind him.

He chuckles, but follows your command, getting on the bed until he’s hovering over your body, warm breath scented like vanilla milkshake fanning across your face.

“Thank you,” you say sweetly, “for coming with me.” 

“Of course,” he says, “I wanted to come and so did the guys. You reminded us how important it is to take time off, even with our jobs.” 

You were terrified of the thought of dating an Avenger when you first met Steve in your local coffee shop in Brooklyn. You’d seen them on the news plenty of times of course, but had never come face to face with one of the mighty heroes until then. The two of you hit it off right away, and it didn’t take him very long to ask you to be his girlfriend. You remember the day like it was yesterday, and remember even more vividly how scared you were before meeting the rest of the team for the first time. 

It was your idea to take the road trip, because you wanted to get closer to the people who Steve trusted with his life. You liked all of them and wanted everyone to come along, but sadly not everyone on the team could get vacation time simultaneously, so instead of bringing the whole gang along, it was just the four of you. You’d been driving for two days straight now, and so far everything had gone smoothly. 

You’ve grown to love Sam, because the two of you can just bicker about absolutely nothing for hours on end, and you share the same dry, sarcastic humor. Bucky was harder to read in the beginning, but after seeing you and Steve together, he’s grown to love you like a sister, and you him like a brother just the same. 

“I know how much you love your job,” you say, “I just don’t want you to think I’m trying to rip you away from it.” 

He shakes his head, “of course not, baby. Like I said, I wanted to come. I enjoy spending time with you, and I can’t wait to spend two weeks with you and my best friends in a cabin by a beautiful lake.” 

“I hope you know I’m going to push you in the water,” you smile. 

“Baby,” he snorts, “do you really think you can move me even an inch? I’m the mighty Captain America.” 

“You may be Captain America, but I’ll catch you off guard and have you soaked in no-time.” 

He kisses you deeply, savoring the sweet taste of your cherry Chap-stick and the scent of your vanilla body splash. Then, he gets up from the bed, taking your arms and pulling you up with him. 

“What are you doing?” you ask, frowning when he slips on his sneakers. 

“We’re going for a walk,” he explains, “come on.” 

You follow him outside, enjoying the lingering heat on your bare arms when the two of you walk around the premises of the motel. He grabs your hand and holds it, thumb rubbing gentle circles over your skin that leave you feeling warm from the inside as well. The two of you are silent when you walk, the only sound audible being the gravel beneath your feet and the occasional car driving along the road behind you.

An hour later, you return to your room and within minutes of your heads hitting the pillows, both of you are knocked out cold.

The cabin you rented for two weeks is even more beautiful in person than in the pictures you found of it online. It’s the perfect mixture of modernistic architecture with classic log cabin vibes, which are created by the wooden log exterior and glass panels that give a perfect living room view out onto the glistening lake. Inside, the interior is eclectic, futuristic furniture with deer heads mounted to the walls. You and Steve share the master bedroom upstairs, while Bucky and Sam each have their own room on the ground floor. There’s a fireplace in the living space that is connected to the kitchen, which you immediately begin to fill with the groceries you picked up shortly before your arrival. 

Remembering you have to feed three hungry men who eat like bears, you immediately start dinner while the three of them explore the surrounding area. Sam is particularly excited about renting a boat, and you’re not opposed to spending some time out on the water yourself. You decide to make something simple, pasta Alfredo, and make sure to place a handful of beers in the freezer to chill while you cook. Steve and Bucky may not be able to get drunk, but they can still enjoy a cold one. 

After dinner, Bucky and Sam disappear again for another walk with just the two of them, and when you voice your concerns regarding them getting lost in the woods, they - including Steve - have no trouble reminding you of their Avenger status. You’re embarrassed for a moment, until Steve kisses your cheek and the guys apologize to you. The grins never leave their faces, though. 

“Those two are awfully happy to spend time together,” you mention while washing the dishes, “I feel a bromance blossoming right before us.” 

“I’ll pretend to know what a bromance is and agree with you,” Steve places a dried plate back inside the cabinet, “I love you.” 

You smile, cheeks heating when he squeezes your side with his fingers before kissing you softly on the lips. You marvel at him, amazed with how much of a perfect boyfriend he is, and kiss him twice more before the sound of running water brings you back down from the cloud you’re doing cartwheels on. 

“I like your dress,” he says, “it’s very pretty.”

“Of course you like it,” you state, “I wore it for you.” 

Steve drops the towel in his hands onto the counter and moved behind you. He pushes you hair to the side and his lips ghost over the bare skin of you neck, fingers playing teasingly with the spaghetti straps of your pastel pink summer dress. 

“Did you, now?” He whispers in your ear, hands caressing your bare shoulders and upper arms in a slow manner. 

You hum in response and shudder when he kisses your neck, softly sucking and biting on the exposed skin. The way he manages to instantly find just the spot you like does something funny to your heart rate and breathing every time, and just as you’re about to order him into your bedroom, the front door opens, and two laughing men stumble inside. 

Steve groans from the loss of contact, but steps away from you nonetheless, and he follows the sound of laughter into the living room while you finish doing the dishes alone. Tomorrow the two of them can do it, you think in annoyance. This is your vacation too, after all, and the person who cooks is never the one who cleans. 

Just before you enter the living room, the three men are speaking in hushed tones. You can’t make out what they’re saying, but the conversation falls silent the second you walk in and the atmosphere feels tense. You want to say something about the newfound silence, but swallow your words when Steve speaks first.

“Wanna go for a walk?” Steve asks with a twinkle in his eye when he spots you, and you nod hesitantly, eyes scanning the guys’ faces.

Your feet graze the beautiful old rug, and you lean against the bookshelf that’s stuffed with encyclopedias and classic board games like Monopoly, scrabble and Clue. There’s a painting above the door you only just noticed. It’s a replica of The Allegory of Painting by Vermeer.

“Something wrong?” You ask, afraid of work-related issues rising during your first night at the lake, but Steve waves them away when motions for you to join him after ordering the guys to finish cleaning up the kitchen space. 

it’s warm outside when you step onto the wooden porch, and the sound of fireflies and lizards hidden from view creates a smile on your face. It’s extremely peaceful and quiet, just what the guys need; an idyllic getaway from their jam packed schedules as Avengers and the fast-paced New York City lifestyle. It’s nice to see Steve this relaxed, you think when you take his hand, and you follow him down the trail that leads around the lake.

This is the Steve you fell in love with nearly two years ago now. You loved him, every part of him, but you had to admit you preferred casual Steve over his alternative persona. With you, he could be his authentic self. No fronts, no righteous facade, just Steve, with flaws and imperfections and questions about life in the 21st century that he only dared to ask you because you’d never laugh at him for not knowing how to work induction plates and FaceTime.

“This place is incredible,” he says when turning back to look at the slowly disappearing cabin. 

It is. It’s better than any of the places either of you have stayed at since you started dating. Hell, it even beats Tony’s penthouse suite and the mansion he owns in the south of Greece. He let you two stay there for your one-year anniversary. You smile when thinking back on that time. 

Usually, you wouldn’t even dream of walking around outside late at night, but you’ve never felt safer with Steve’s hand clasped tightly in yours. You want him here, and the look in his eyes he gives you every time he tries to secretly glance at you lets you know he wants to be here just as bad. Exactly that is what makes your relationship work; it’s a companionship just as much as it is a friendship. 

It’s nearly impossible for you to imagine him on the job when he’s strolling alongside you on the trail illuminated by the light of the moon, nearly impossible to imagine the brute force he’s accustomed to using on a daily basis. Steve’s not a violent man by nature, but his willpower to win a fair fight and keep the world safe from inner- and outer-worldly threats require him to use his power and strength all the time. You know it’s a part of him and it most likely always will be and you’ve accepted it, but still, having a super hero boyfriend brings baggage you only have time to think about when you’re spending quality time with him. It’s during those times that you realize how busy he actually is, and even though you don’t blame him for it, it still saddens you. 

“Penny for your thoughts?” He asks, watching you bite your lip in thought. 

You smile at him, “I’m just very happy you came.” 

“Honey,” he presses, “I already told you I wouldn’t miss this for the world.” 

“I know,” you reply, “but I also know your job is your life, and I can’t help but feel as if I’m trying to take you away from it.” 

He takes your face in his hands and bends down until his eyes meet yours, “Don’t ever say that again, you hear me? I mean it. I. Want. To. Spend. Time. With you. Too much work isn’t healthy, and I need you to tell me to stop when I go too far.” 

The two of you continue walking further along the trail, until finally, you pass between a group of tall trees. 

Your jaw drops when you reach the clearing, tears pricking the corners of your eyes when you look at what’s in front of you. A dozen torches, spread around the clearing in the shape of a heart light up the entire area. In the center, a blanket and two fluffy pillows are spread out across the grass. Beside it is a picnic basket, filled to the brim with fruits, snacks, and a bottle of expensive wine. 

“What is this?” You ask when Steve leads you closer to the blanket, “Steve! Did you put Sam and Bucky up to this?”

You walk closer towards the scene, face glowing in the orange flames, “this is amazing!” 

“Y/N,” he says, pulling on your wrist to catch your attention, “I love you, baby.” 

You look back at him just in time to see him falling to one knee, and when he shoves his hand into his back pocket to retrieve a blue velvet box, your vision blurs until you’re rapidly blinking to keep the tears at bay. 

“I’ve loved you from the first moment I met you,” he says, “you keep me grounded when my head is too far up in the clouds. You make me want to be a better man every day. You shine brighter than any light in New York City, and I want that shine to be for me, and me alone. I want you to take my name, Y/N. I’m not worthy of you, but I promise you I’ll do my best every day to try. Please let me try.” 

You’re crying, ugly crying now, and you don’t even realize you’re shaking your head until he finally speaks the words you’re dying to hear spill from his heart-shaped lips, “Marry me, baby.” 

“Yes,” you manage between cries, “of course I will!” 

The diamonds sparkle around your finger when he slips it on, and you’re hanging onto his neck for dear life the second he lets go of your hand.

“I love you, sweetheart,” he mumbles into your hair, “love you so much.” 

“I love you too Steve,” you sniffle. 

Yeah, this really is the nicest place the two of you have ever been. 

[orbitariums]

i don’t wanna miss a thing | stark! reader

hey guys! this was requested a while ago, just got up to it <3

word count: 1.9k 

Request: You are Stark's daughter and whenever he pisses you off you go over to Peter's house to chill out without Stark knowing and Aunt May loves you. Can be a oneshot or headcanon I'm not picky love ♡

    "Dad, seriously?" you shouted, a mixture of a whine and anger, standing at your dad's heels as he walked away from you.

    "Dead serious," he whipped around on his heels to face you and stared you down, and you folded your arms over your chest, rolling your eyes. Of course Tony noticed, and he furrowed his brows. "And enough with the attitude. Your eyes are-"

     "Gonna get stuck there, yeah, I know," you completed his sentence for him - how could you not, when he'd been saying that to you since you were a child? But if anything, he was to blame for your supposed attitude problem. Attitude was practically built into Stark blood.

    "You're being a little brat. Don't you start," Tony warned, and by the look in his eyes, he was dead serious.  

    Tony had this thing where he didn't like when you complained about not getting what you wanted because- "look around!" he'd say, "what more is there to ask for? He just didn't want you falling privy to the spoiled rich brat trope, which you appreciated, but you both knew you weren't anything like that. And anyways, you still felt like you reserved the right to complain. Like right now, he was telling you that you couldn't go out for your friend's birthday trip to Cape Cod on the weekend because of "family stuff." When did you ever have family things? It was really just you and Tony and your mom - and the Parkers, since you counted them as family. Peter Parker was your close friend, and that was before he became Spiderman. Him being Spiderman now, and working with your dad, was just a small plus.

    "This is so unfair," you muttered, scoffing as you turned around and headed for the door.

    "Don't you talk under your breath!" Tony called after you, and since he couldn't see you, you rolled your eyes hard. "Hey, I'm talking to you!"

    Tony's voice was cut off by the sound of you closing the door shut, and walking out onto the cobblestone streets. You'd get on the train and go the only place you ever went when your dad pissed you off - Peter's apartment in Queens. You loved Tony, but sometimes, you just needed a break.

    Walking into Peter's apartment, it was like a wave of calm rushed over you. You'd already relaxed some on the train ride over there, but actually being at his place granted you a homey feeling like no other. You could be with your friend and May, and Tony had no idea. It was your oasis, your home away from home. When you knocked on the door, there was a loud bang, then a:

    "Coming!" from Aunt May, whose voice you instantly recognized.

The door swung open, and you were greeted by the sight of May, who was very clearly frazzled but trying to appear put together. She lost the facade upon seeing you though, and groaned quite honestly,

     "Ugh, YN, I'm glad it's you. I'm a mess right now. Come in, Peter's in his room!"

    "Hey, Aunt May," you grinned, glad to see a friendly face, and she drew you in for a hug before you walked in, closing the door behind you.

May had a big kitchen glove on her hand and her apron was halfway done, the straps slouching down her shoulders. There were also bits of flour in her hair, and the smell of the smoke wafting from the kitchen was somewhere between burning and delicious. She noticed the confused look on your face and laughed, shaking her head with a wave of her hand,

    "Tryna bake. Yeah, turns out the emergency room doesn't train you in... baking mishaps."

You laughed,

     "Don't worry, me and Peter'll help you."

    "No need, hon', just make yourself at home, I'll figure something out. It's good to see- shit," May swore, catching a whiff of the smoke drifting into the living room from the kitchen.

    She ran off, and you shook your head playfully, making your way to Peter's room instead. You knew his apartment like clockwork, you'd been there so many times. You didn't only go when Tony pissed you off, but if that had been the case, you still would've been there a hell of a lot of times. You knocked on Peter's door and he answered, telling you to come in. He was sat on the edge of his bed, headphones in his ears, scrolling through his phone. When he looked up to see you, his face shifted in pleasant surprise. He took one earbud out and smiled up at you,

    "Oh, hey YN. What's up?"

    You smiled and leaned against his open doorframe, glad to see yet another friendly face.

    "Dad drama," you said.

    "Again?" Peter questioned, and he waved his hand in the air, beckoning you to him. You sat on the bed next to him as he showed you the song he was listening to on his phone. "Add it to your playlist."

    "Pete, you listen to the weirdest music," you chuckled, shaking your head- but you added the song to your playlist anyway.

    "It's not weird," Peter frowned. "Probably better than Black Sabbath."

    Your eyes widened playfully and you grinned, knowing that you were the topic of his teasing.

    "Don't say that around my dad."

    Peter's face went red and he seemed to recoil just at the idea of what would happen if he dissed Black Sabbath in front of your dad, who was the number one Black Sabbath fan.

    "Don't have to tell me twice."

You and Peter hung around in his room for a while. You didn't have much to talk about, but Peter could go on and on about his nerdy interests. You kind of just followed him around his room while he showed you all the new stuff that he was working on. It gave you a sense of peace to be around him. He was different from most of your friends, who could sometimes fit the "spoiled brat" stereotype that Tony so faithfully worked for you to avoid. So you liked listening to Pete ramble on about legos and Star Wars - it got you out of your head and made you forget about whatever stupid thing your dad had annoyed you over.

   "And that's the entire plot of Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back," Pete said, sitting back in his computer chair while you observed his action figures on the shelf beside his desk, picking up a miniature Jar Jar Binks.

    "Hey, Pete?"

    "Hm?" he hummed.

    "Your aunt's baking... or trying to bake. Should we help her?"

    "Crap," Pete facepalmed, shaking his head. "I should've known. Come on, let's save Aunt May."

     The two of you sauntered into the kitchen where May had her back against the fridge, oven mitts to her face in pure despair. She shook her head sadly upon seeing the both of you, and gestured over to the burnt baked goods on the stovetop.

    "Remind me to never cook again."

    "Don't worry Aunt May, we'll help you," you reassured her, looking up at the kitchen clock. "'S only 3 PM. We've got time."

    "Ugh, I knew I loved you for a reason," May said, and both you and Peter helped her up off the ground. May put a loving hand on your shoulder, a smile on her face. "You're like the child I never had."

    "Hey!" Peter whined, making both you and May chuckle.

    "Works every time," you said, smirking.

You, May, and Peter spent the next few hours baking - it was a trial and error process, especially because May refused to use box mix. She felt it was important that she broaden her horizons and actually learn something new. But at some point, you finished, with flying colors. An array of brownies, cookies, and various baked goods lay before you. And besides, it had been a fun few hours - anything you did with May and Peter was always beyond ordinary. It was more of a dance party than anything else, Peter blasting his "weird" music which you not-so-secretly enjoyed anyway.

    May ordered takeout as well, because "I'm not even going to actually try to cook anything", and invited you to stay for dinner. You figured why not, but knew that it would be smart to get back to your dad afterwards. So once you said your goodbyes to the Parkers, you hopped back on the train to your house.

    "Nice to see you're back," said Friday as you entered the passcode, the gate to your house opening.

    "Missed ya, Friday."

You walked up the steps and opened the door - to your confusion, you were met with the sound of loud music. You were a bit frightened at first - Tony played his music all the time, but the house appeared to be empty, and you had to be alert of threats at all times, even though Tony took care of you without trouble. Then, you realized that you recognized the song, and that you could hear Tony singing from the living room, waiting for you to come to him.                                            

    You hung your head when you saw your dad standing on the couch, arms outstretched and his head flung back as he made a performance out of the song, singing and dancing along. And of course, the song was none other than "I Don't Wanna Miss a Thing" by Aerosmith. And you were his audience. The music rang in your ears and your dad's singing was horrendous, but you couldn't help but laugh. If this was his way of asking for forgiveness, you'd accept.

    He pointed at you, and holding a fake mic in his hands shouted the words,

    "Even when I dream of you, the sweetest dream will never do, 'cuz I miss you babe, and I don't wanna miss a thing!"

    You just folded your arms and watched your dad make a fool of himself, but you couldn't lie - it was endearing. Tony Stark was nothing if not a drama queen, and he couldn't help but make a show out of everything, including his apologies. You watched him take a few more gratuitous moments, singing along to the classic song and dancing around, pleading with you.

     Eventually, he hopped off the couch and glided over to you, a crease in his brows as he fake pouted,

      "Missed ya."

     "Missed you too, dad," you smirked, leaning in for the hug that he was offering.

    He knew he pissed you off sometimes - he didn't grovel for your forgiveness, but he knew when he should at least apologize. As much as you and your dad argued, it was no mistake that your love was unconditional.

     "Forgive me?" he asked, gazing down at you, and you smiled.

     "Honestly, I forgot all about it," you chuckled, and Tony grinned.

     "Where do you go when you're mad at me anyway?" Tony asked, and as much as you were glad your whereabouts were unknown, you were surprised Tony hadn't just figured it out by now.

    "That's confidential," you reached up and kissed his cheek, even though he had narrowed his eyes at you, distrusting.

      "I'll figure it out," he called after you as you headed further into the house to get to your room.

     "Don't!" you called out.

As always, you couldn't stay mad at your dad for long.

[amelink66world]

Love of my Life

Heyyy guys!! Checks out the new chapter! Kinda steamy ;)

Patience...or not?

It's been exactly 2 weeks since their date. They had gone on four more dates each one ending just like the first one, though the feeling of need only intensified with the next. Even the slightest touch ignited a fire inside them.

This going slow thing is too much!! I can't bear it anymore. I have to talk to her! I mean, she's killing me here. Ughh but I need to wait. This is what she wants and I can do anything for her. Sooo, suck it up, Atticus Lincoln. He groaned thinking why in the world did he agree to take things slow when he knew it would be too hard to control himself in her presence, especially when she looked sooo sexy all the time! It's like she was doing it on purpose!!! He walked towards the coffee cart, waiting for Amelia as usual. He chuckled, she's always late.

Meredith and Maggie tried their level best to mind their own business but Amelia was making it really very hard. This whole past week, she was in a pretty bad mood. You could hear her soft groans and grunts from time to time. Some head banging on the table was involved too. One time, Meredith had to cover Bailey's ear when his dearest Aunty Amelia came down the stairs cursing. Of course, she hadn't noticed the child in the living room before muttering those horrendous words not suitable for a child to hear.

Maggie probed and prodded her occasionally but she just wouldn't budge. Meredith finally snapped. "WHAT?!" They were carpooling to the hospital, as usual. Amelia looked up from her usual seat at the back, astonished. She was continuously sighing which annoyed the crap out of Meredith. Amelia asked, " What? What did I do? "

" Obviously something's bothering you, Amelia. We can't see you like this anymore. What is it? Just spit it out now! ," Meredith said indignantly.

" It's nothing," she muttered.

Maggie sighed. Curiosity was turning into exasperation. " You know, you can talk to us, right? We're here for you," she smiled. Amelia returned her smile and told her genuinely, " I'm just not ready to tell y'all about it. I'll tell you two at the right time. Don't worry about me." Meredith seemed convinced with her answer too and nodded before continuing driving.

SHIT! I'm late again. Link must be waiting for me. Ugghh, she groans way too loudly. Amelia rushed to the attendings' lounge and quickly changed into her scrubs. She hurried towards the coffee cart and could not spot Link anywhere. He didn't wait for me?! Oh yeah right,who am I kidding? I'm 20 minutes late! He can't wait for me forever. He has patients to see, Amelia thought sadly. Dejectedly she stood in line which was moving way too slow adding to her frustration.

What she didn't know was that Link had noticed her almost dashing towards the coffee cart and wanted to tease her a little bit. He just moved a few steps back and his behind a tree until she got in the line. This was his favourite pastime now, to rile Amelia up so much that she would be forced to break that "going slow" deal and crack under the pressure. He would always pull away just in the nick of time before things got too far, making her mad. He just loved it when she got mad. Her cheeks flushed deep red and her eyes burned with such fire and desire when she got angry that he had a hard time keeping himself in check. Obviously what he was trying to do had consequences too. He always had to adjust his clothing to get rid of the sudden tightness he felt after such nuances.

Amelia suddenly felt the oh so familiar fingers sliding up her arm and her back being pressed to a sturdy chest. " You like to make me wait, don't you?", he breathed in her ear. The obvious innuendo was not lost on her. She shivered. Okay. That's enough! Do I really need to hold on for soooo long?! I'll jump him RIGHT NOW! Uggghhh...but he turned it into a competition now. No backing out now, Amelia Shepherd.

Link very well knew what effect he had on her. He wanted her to know the ridiculousness of the deal. Deciding to play dirty, he started peppering her exposed neck with feather light kisses driving her mad. They were in the middle of the park, for crying out loud!! Amelia clutched his arms wrapped around her waist for support. She was trying so hard not to moan that it seemed to physically hurt her. Her nails dug into his skin but he didn't seem to mind. Finally satisfied with his work, he pulled back before softly kissing her cheek from her behind.

Breathless, Amelia opened her eyes and smiled at his goofy face. She then mock glared at him and whispered fiercely, " You'll pay for this, mister."

His face gleamed with a dazzling smile, "Oh, that's the whole plan all along. I'll definitely wait for it." He winked at her. She blushed deep red and hit his arm. Both of them laughed. They engaged in a deep conversation about their surgeries for the day and planned to watch movies together after their shifts.

As usual, Link ordered her coffee and paid. Amelia didn't even bother to protest, he just never listened.

Their hands were constantly bumping while walking towards the hospital. Neither of them noticed who held whose hand first. It just kept happening again and again. It became like a routine. Meeting each other first thing in the morning after reaching the hospital, walking back together, having lunch in the cafeteria, making out in the on-call room for several moments between surgeries and then occasionally him dropping her off to Mer's place after their shifts. This became like a routine. THEIR routine.

The elevator was partly empty by the time they entered. They were standing next to each other with his hand on her back when suddenly a large group of people entered the elevator together. It had suddenly become very crowded. To shield Amelia from the occasional bumping, he pulled her behind him at the back of the elevator and stood stoically in front of her. She stared at him with adoration for several long moments. She was utterly grateful for this man in her life. He is so damn thoughtful! I've never had someone thinking so selflessly about me. God, I love him.

Link always wanted to protect her from everything in the world. He had decided he would always be her shield and keep her away from ever getting hurt. She could always lean on him and find him in her corner. He was pulled out of his thoughts when he felt her soft fingers gently wrapped around his waist from behind and she hugged him. Link felt his heart burst with emotion and a gleeful smile framed his face. He slightly leaned back to reciprocate the hug and caressed her fingers with one hand.

They were locked into a tight embrace till the elevator cleared out and they reached the Neuro floor. Link pulled her from behind him and towards his body. He kissed her deeply before whispering, "Have a great day." Amelia sighed with delight and kissed his cheek before pulling back. "You too!" She then playfully ordered after getting out, "Miss mee!!" She heard his laughter as the doors closed. She was highly enjoying the hospital nowadays.

Four hours and two craniotomies later, Amelia was starving. She missed Link terribly and had texted him immediately after her surgery but there was no reply. Maybe he's in surgery. Pcchhhh. She wanted to meet Link. She loved having him around. She loved their conversations, their silences, their routine. She was content and didn't want to lose all of this. She knew it was too soon to feel like this, yet she had never felt like this in her entire life! This was not irrational and impulsive Tumor Amelia. This was new. Wait, love? Is it really love? It's too soon. Nope.

She went to the cafeteria and suddenly found her eyes wandering aimlessly. Where IS everybody?! Suddenly quite surprisingly there was no one in this freaking hospital for her to talk to. There was always someone. ALWAYS. People never seemed to mind their own business here. Everyone knew about everyone and everything. Privacy actually is a thing of the past here. Groaning she grabbed a cookie and went to the pit to look for some interesting. A surgery always helps, doesn't it?

Going to the pit proved to be fruitful. Well not like thaaat, if you know what I mean. Not that I want people to have injuries. Her patient needed an ortho consult stat before going into surgery. Luckily, Nico took over for him in the OR and he came for the consult. Amelia was really glad.

Accustomed with Link's plan of action, she had already ordered an MRI. She was trying to read the scans in the room when Link suddenly brushed past her moving to the screen just next to hers. Obviously, it was intentional. Amelia hid her smile and acted nonchalant. In reality, her skin was tingling where his skin brushed hers. A devious plan popped up in her head and she smirked. No one messed with Amelia Shepherd.

Acting serious, she deliberately brushed past his body and moved to his left. Link worked an eyebrow and looked down at where her skin touched his. He shrugged and concentrated on the scans. This happened again. And again. He smirked and tilted his head towards her. " What are you doing, Amelia? Is this your weird version of Tit for Tat, huh?," he asked with amusement.

Amelia feigned offence, " Hey! First of all, it's not weird. Second, what are you talking about?," she asked with innocence and blinked. He just squinted his eyes accusingly and looked down at her, trying to break her facade but she just shrugged and moved. AGAIN. This time, the scan Link was looking at suddenly interested her too much.

Unabashedly she moved to stand right in front of him and leaned back slightly. Link's breath hitched and his hand involuntarily moved towards her. But he stopped them just in time. He wanted to see how far she'd go even if that meant taking a very cold shower in the lounge afterwards. He could practically see her smirk from the back of her head! Oh this woman will be the death of me! She knows what she does to me. Everytime. He held in a breath.

Feigning interest in the upper part of the scan, she stood her tip toes and leaned back furthermore to trace her finger on the scan. This movement pushed her ass right into his groin. Notwithstanding any of this anymore, Link groaned and grabbed her waist tightly. He pulled her body snug towards him and breathed down her neck. " Well played, Amelia," he whispered seductively. Before he could start kissing down her neck, Amelia rotated her hips once before turning in his arms. She wrapped her arms around his neck, pushing her body towards him which he gladly accepted. She kissed along his jaw and moved to his neck before brushing her lips with his.

Wanting to dominate the kiss, Link deepened the kiss and softly bit her bottom lip. Several moments later, she pulled back and moved towards his neck. Her kisses ignited a fire inside his body and he pulled her towards him even more. His fingers played with the hem of her top. She slided her fingers to his hair and gently tugging his hair. He groaned and moved his hand inside her top. She sighed loudly and bit his earlobe before seductively whispering, "The ball was always in my court, mister." She tugged his hair once last time before completely pulling back, leaving him shocked and equally frustrated.

She was grinning triumphantly whilst adjusting her top, all the while maintaining eye contact with him. Link groaned in frustration, " Ameliaaaaa...nooo. You cannot do this to meee! ", he whined. Amelia only laughed and blew a kiss at him while moving towards the door. " Tit for Tat, baby. I...have surgery. And you obviously need to take care of...that," she pointed towards his lower half. Link looked down horrified and completely missed her disappearing in the hallway.

Her laugh echoed making him laugh at her feistiness. God, I love that woman. I promise, one day I'll marry her. This was what he totally loved about her, she never backed down from a challenge. He shook his head at her antics with a loving smile on his face and stared at the door for few long seconds and moved to look at the scans, all the while adjusting his pants which was almost impossible in the condition she left him in.

Amelia's surgery finished early and she decided to wait for Link. She had texted Link. She even texted Meredith informing her that she would arrive home late. Upon receiving double question marks from her, she texted her that she would explain later. Maggie was the only person apart from Jo who knew about them. People were getting to know about them but the word hadn't spread much. For that she was grateful. All of the hospital gossip was now directed towards Jackson which she did not mind. That's the least he can go through for dumping my sister the way that he did, she puffed her cheeks and rolled her eyes.

In the attendings' lounge, about twenty minutes later, Link came running. She looked up from her instagram and chuckled at his disheveled appearance, " I will never get how you can run so much." She shook her head. Link laughed and leaned close to her face, whispering hoarsely, " Got to keep myself in shape," he wiggled his eyebrows suggestively. Amelia stopped chucking and looked deep into his eyes.

Link pulled back and removed his scrub too right in front of her face, his torso directly in her immediate lone of vision. Amelia's eyes darkened at the sight and she gulped. She suddenly found herself drooling and wanted so badly to touch those damn sexy abs. Her eyes patiently roamed his bare figure before meeting his eyes. He was enjoying it thoroughly. He was observing her face the whole time and smirked proudly. Her hungry, dark orbs met his playful, blue ones. They stared at each other for several long moments. His smirk grew even more and he flexed his pecks once before breaking eye contact and moving towards his cubby.

Amelia gulped and tried to calm her nerves. When did it get so hot in here?! She wanted to fan her face at the sight of his bare back but caught ahold of herself. She was ogling him shamelessly and she was painfully cognizant that he was aware of this fact. But she didn't care. That man is beautiful! It would be a shame not to stare at such a gorgeously sculpted man. But only I can stare! No one else. And why is he taking so long to change?!

" What?!," she shouted pointedly. She looked at him accusingly. Link turned around with pure innocence, " What?," he blinked like a child.

" Do it fast !"

" Do what fast?," he prompted feigning confusion. But he could not trick her.

" We're getting late. Change faster, Link!," she was getting really aroused and could not trust herself any longer. She even pointed her finger at him for extra measure. Link hid his smile and raised his arms in surrender. Suddenly he possessed the speed of lightning and was ready to leave in no time. He smirked and shrugged proudly.

Amelia shook her head and rolled her eyes at his petulance, " Couldn't you have done that sooner? " Link only laughed in response and took her hand in his.

They silently left the hospital and drove in Link's car. They were each telling how their day was when he pulled the car to a movie rental store. It was already late so they figured that they would rent a movie and watch at his place with pizza and popcorn. Each selected a movie of their choice, Amelia a rom-com and Link a superhero movie. Both of them laughed at the cliche an proceeded to get the pizza.

Amelia had spent the night at his place before so she already had extra clothes there. Link changed into his boxers and a loose tshirt while Amelia was in the washroom, freshening up. He laid put her pajamas on the bed before going to the kitchen to warm the pizza. He even prepared the popcorn and proceeded to keep the food on the on the sofa. He got comfortable by the time she arrived. He turned his head in her direction and felt the wind knocked out of his chest.

She had never looked sexier to him. She was wearing nothing but his old Mariners tshirt which was triple her size and hanged loosely on her body. It didn't even reach mid-thigh !! Her long, slim legs were completely bare and he had a hard time trying to concentrate on something other than her legs. Amelia dressed in his clothes made her ten times sexier. God, this woman surprises me every time! How does she expect me hold back when she's dressed like that?! Ugghh, Ameliaaaa. He silently groaned when she nonchalantly sat close to him and stretched her legs on the table in front. His eyes just could not leave her legs!

She snatched the remote from his lap and showed him a 'V' sign. She grinned and played her movie. Link stared at her, mesmerised. How can a person be so beautiful, both in and out?! She is the cutest human being on the planet. Wanting to feel her close to him, he pulled her close. He wrapped arm around her and she laid her head comfortably on his shoulder. They had their pizza while watching the movie. Well, Amelia watched the movie whereas Link watched her. He admired her completely and placed an impromptu kiss on her head.

Suddenly he reached into the pizza box only to find that one slice was left. Amelia had reached for a slice at the same time and their hands bumped. Both of them looked at each other with determination willing the other to back out. Amelia was quick to react though. She snatched the box and took off running. Link was both amused and determined to win at the same time. He followed her in the whole apartment and their laughter could be heard from a mile away.

Link was amazed. For such a petite person, she sure could run very fast. Her lack of clothing did not help his case either. His arousal was increasing by the minute. He followed her into the kitchen and it was now his turn to think quicker. He successfully trapped her between the kitchen counter and his body. Amelia tried to wiggle away but her efforts went in vain. He squinted his eyes and mock threatened her, " Give me the box, Amelia."

Defiance ran in her veins. " Nope. The slice is mine." She moved to open the box but before she could do that, Link pinned her hand behind her. The atmosphere in the room rapidly changed. Suddenly highly aware of their proximity, Amelia looked into his eyes only to find them dark with desire. Amelia wanted to melt at the hungry look he was giving her. I just don't want to wait anymore!

Link pushed himself closer to her to gauge her reaction. But she was visibly panting thereby encouraging him. He pried the pizza box from her hand and place it behind her on the counter, never once breaking the eye contact. His eyes fluttered closed and he inched his face closer but when he was only centimeters away from her lips, she whispered, " Link..."

Thinking she's asking him to stop so that they could take things slow, Link pulled back slightly but didn't remove his hands from her body. He desperately whined, " Please don't ask me to stop, Amelia. Screw 'taking this slow'. I don't want to take things slow with you, Amelia. I'm all in. Do you hear me? All in. And I really, really like you. So let's just please forget about that. I really wanna feel you close to me. It's been too long, Amelia and I miss you! Also, how do you even expect me control myself while you waltz in the room wearing nothing but MY tshirt looking so damn sexy that I couldn't remove my eyes from you! You're killing me here, woman," he groaned.

Amelia stopped his rant by putting a finger to his lips. She then cupped his cheeks and made him look into her eyes. She smiled widely at him and whispered seductively, " Shut up, Link and just kiss me already! " Link looked at her with astonishment before grinning mischievously and picking her up in his arms. He placed her on the counter. He pried her legs open and stood between them.

The tshirt rode way up exposing her creamy thighs. Link ran his hands up her thighs and groaned, " God, you're sooo sexy, Amelia." She moaned and pulled him in by his tshirt for a bruising kiss. It had been too long. There was no stopping them now.

Their tongues were battling for dominance. Link wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled body close to his. Amelia played with the hem of his tshirt and pulled it above his head, momentarily breaking the kiss. Link used this opportunity to his advantage and completely dominated the kiss this time. He was hungrily kissing, biting, nipping and licking her lips. Amelia desperately groaned and held onto his shoulders with dear life. That kiss was single handedly capable of making her cum!

He moved down to her neck and pulled his tshirt down to fully expose her left shoulder. Amelia tilted her head to give him more access which he gladly accepted. He slid her right hand up her body and grabbed her breast. She moaned loudly and tugged his hair with her fingers. She bucked her hips forward in desperate need of friction. He was palming her breast through the tshirt. She wrapped her legs around his waist and pulled him even more towards her.

He pulled back slightly only to remove her, rather, his tshirt from her body. He blatantly stared at her, taking her in, mesmerized. She was not wearing a bra underneath!! She definitely wanted to kill me tonight! She had given him enough time to start at her body and couldn't wait any longer. She pulled him down and kissed him fiercely. She ran her hand down his torso along his strong abs. Oh, I wanted to touch them for soooo long! Wanting to completely devour her, he picked her up. She wrapped her legs around his waist whilst he carried her towards the bedroom, never once breaking the kiss.

He sat on the edge of the bed with her sitting on his lap. He squeezed her cheeks pulling her further towards him. Both of them groaned. Amelia pushed him down on the bed and straddled him. She leaned down to whisper in his ear, " No more of this 'taking things slow' crap. I'm all in, too. And just by the way... I like you a lot too, Atticus Lincoln." She grinned down at him. Her words pulled at his heart strings and he quickly changed their positions. He pinned her arms above her head and smirked down at her, "That's good, Amelia Shepherd. That's the nicest thing I've ever heard," before diving in.

Author's Note:

Heyyy guysss!!! Sorry for being AWOL for soooo long. I don't even know what came over me when I took such a long break. Huuhh, writing again is so refreshing! I missed all of my readers!

This is a brand new chapter for you. I hope you really, really it ;))) Again, I apologize for the delay in updating this story. ( please don't hit me, guys 😅🙈 )

Anyway, don't forget to vote and do drop some comments! I just looovee reading your comments. They encourage me so freaking much! Thank you guys for all the love!❤ I surely don't deserve so much. Next chapter will be up in a few days. Until then.

[tired-imagination]

“Snowball Fight” - Shihai Kuroiro (Seasons Event)

“Art, the fuck have you been doing? Why aren’t you posting?” 

First off, I have a Patreon now! I’ve been working on writing stories, specifically for the $1 and $5 tiers, just so that I’m ready for school. You can keep more up to date in my discord server. Currently working on a Bakugo comfort, in fact 

Here we go, another event fic, with our lovely void Shihai Kuroiro, taking place in winter because it’s burning hot and I want it to be cold. 

WARNING: Innuendos, ALL CHARACTERS AGED UP 19+ 

“It would be nice if you didn’t watch me from the shadows, Shihai. I like being able to see my boyfriend sometimes.” You looked up from the cookies you were baking, looking around the dimly lit room for where Shihai was. 

“It’s a bit more fun when you have to look for me, sunshine.” His voice came from right behind you, his breath hot on your neck as his arms wrapped around you, running over your torso as he buried his face in your hair, leaving gentle kisses against your scalp. “Besides, the shadows have become my home. You’re the light, I’m the dark, we’re the perfect couple. Wouldn’t you think so, my love?” 

You turned around in his arms, pressing a kiss against his lips, his arms wrapping around you tightly as you hummed slightly, burying your face in his neck. “Say that one more time, and I’ll drag your ass outside and pummel you with snowballs.” 

“Feisty, I like it. Sadly, sunshine, it looks like I’m a Pro Hero, and damaging government property is a crime.” 

“I like getting punished.” You smirked, kissing the corner of his lips before pulling away, turning back to the cookies to put them in the oven, smiling gently. “If you want to have a snowball fight, I wouldn’t mind. Would be making use of the massive amounts of snow, maybe even convince you to shovel the driveway for once.” 

He laughed, the white of his teeth shining through the abyss that he seemed to be. He poked your tummy, kissing your forehead as he made his way to the coat closet, looking through for the white winter coat that you had gotten him a few years prior. You remembered him asking for a black coat to fit his aesthetic, but that you wanted him to be able to be seen amongst the dark of the night, where you and him would always go out. Besides, during the day, he would always be doing his duty as a pro hero, helping out in the underground tunnels and alleyways. Sometimes he would be gone during the night as well, but tonight, his agency decided to give him a break. Let him spend a night at home with you after several weeks of being out on duty during the day. 

You turned back to your oven, placing the mixing bowls and spoons into your sink for them to be cleaned when you and Shihai got back from your snowball fight. You laughed as you felt Shihai put your coat around your shoulders, his arms wrapping around you once more. “Cookies are amazing, but are we going outside once they’re done?” 

“When they’re done in the oven, I’ll take them out to cool, and then we go outside, yeah?” You left a gentle kiss on his lips, wrapping your arms around his neck as he placed his hands on your thighs, lifting you up onto the counter and burying his face into your neck, his breath hot against your skin as he took gentle inhales of your scent. You pulled away as the timer went off, getting off of the counter and taking the cookies out of the oven, putting them on the counter to cool. You grabbed your winter coat from Shihai’s hands, laughing as he put gloves, scarves, and one of his beanies on your head. He pressed a kiss onto your nose as he grabbed your hand, pulling you outside, bending over to pick up some of the snow from the ground. He threw it at your arm, quickly running to get more of the snow as you slowly gathered a large chunk of the snow to throw back at him. 

After a while, you had lost track of the time and what was happening. Shihai was a lot more playful than he oftentimes is, laughing almost every opportunity he got. He had ended up beating you by managing to stuff the snow down the back of your jacket, playfully burying your feet every time you fell onto the ground. Your face hurt from laughing, so much so that you were unable to feel the cold that was making your fingers so numb. You looked at his beautiful face, his smile shining as brightly as the stars. 

You laughed as Shihai picked you up off of the ground, wrapping his arms around you and carrying you back inside. As he helped you out of the many layers of clothes, you felt the cold finally creep back in as you listened to his gentle hums. 

“I went too hard, didn’t I?” He pouted slightly, going over to the fireplace and starting it up, picking you up once more and laying you down next to it. 

“Just a little bit, but it was fun.” You pecked his lips gently, burying your face into his chest for warmth. You smiled as he wrapped a blanket around you, wrapping it tighter around yourself. Shihai stood, going to the kitchen, coming back a few moments later with a mug, the smell of hot chocolate filling your senses with warmth. You smiled as he lifted the mug to your lips, helping you drink the hot chocolate without taking yourself out of the blanket. 

“I’m so happy to be with you, even if I’m pretty sure you let me win the snowball fight.” He sat next to you, wrapping an arm around your shoulders. “It’s okay though, I appreciate it. I like winning.” 

“I know you do, Shihai. I know you do.” You buried your face in his chest, listening to his heartbeat as the two of you watched the flames of the fireplace slowly eat up the wooden logs, his arms wrapped tight around you. He would never leave your side, you were sure of that much at least. 

[ghostmartyr]

how a life can move from the darkness [7/?]

| 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 |

Summary: Two drug addicts (Eren and Historia) meet in group and decide to be roommates to make their  living situation slightly less weird. From there we do the slow burn  found family dance mixed in with the struggles and agonies of recovery.  Heavy on friendship feels, especially EMA. Eventual yumikuri.

Eren’s first thought was that something was wrong with his taste buds.

He took another bite.

Light and fluffy, with enough crunch to be satisfying, the cookie melted in his mouth with the chocolate chips it was spotted with. Sugary, somehow warm despite living on a table for an hour, and… good. The cookie tasted good. Even with the small scorch marks.

“What do you think?”

Petra was hovering. Almost vibrating with how long she’d held the question back.

“They’re… good,” Eren said. “Really good. What did you do?”

Petra’s face flushed with joy, complete with a happy smile that warmed the whole gym like unfiltered sunshine. “I bought new measuring cups.”

Eren grabbed another cookie. “What was wrong with your old ones?”

She grimaced. “I was using my mom’s measuring cups and spoons. She never told me, but she got them from a bargain bin sale because none of them were labeled right. My father came by for a visit and pointed it out.” Petra sighed sadly and snagged a cookie off the plate, but that smile still shone on through. “That’s what I should have opened today with: the wonders of communication.”

“It’s good you got it sorted out.” Eren hadn’t planned on saying anything about it ever, but Historia had stopped taking the cookies after the last week’s made her throw up.

For him, he had the problem of food starting to taste like food again. He wasn’t sure how many more times he could have eaten Petra’s cookies without wanting to rip out his tongue.

Petra held out the entire plate to him. “Consider these your reward for supporting me all this time. No one else here is going to touch them, so you and Historia can take them home with you. Maybe use them as an excuse to drop by those friends you’ve reconnected with. Or that brother of yours,” she added. “He might have a sweet tooth to exploit.”

Eren took the plate and cut off eye contact so he wasn’t actually frowning at Petra. She’d had enough of that from him. “Aren’t you the one who said not to push everything at once? I just started talking to Armin and Mikasa again.” His thumb ran along a chip in the porcelain. “And it isn’t like everything changed anything between me and Zeke. It’s always been like this.”

“That’s not true,” Petra said, and before Eren could point out that she’d never met him so how would she know, she continued. “You used to never bring him up at all. I think you mentioned him five times today. By name.”

Eren hadn’t noticed that.

The corner with its folding table and loud clock he barely heard anymore felt cramped with just him and Petra. Historia was across the gym, suffering through Daz. Him trying to befriend the feral cats who hung out in the same alley his dealer had before their arrest had somehow turned into her problem.

She’d said she was a heroin addict today. Then she sat down and didn’t talk the rest of the hour. Apparently that marked her as accessible.

“It isn’t a recovery thing,” Eren said. Leaving out the shadow of Mikasa that lived in his mind and reminded him that he’d never gone and dealt with the dad part of what happened. People lost parents. Normal, healthy people. They got over it eventually. He didn’t need an extra boost of support just because he’d lost theirs so violently. Thinking he did was how the pills started. “Zeke’s just Zeke.”

Baseball-obsessed, hard to thank, hard to hate, hard to love.

Hard to have a full conversation with.

Their last one had probably been when he was six, and Zeke was explaining what was so great about a game where you spent most of it standing around doing nothing. He’d patted his helmet onto Eren’s head and carried him around the baseball diamond on his shoulders instead of partying with his division champion team.

Dad had offered to drive them. Zeke turned him down.

“You’re never doing nothing. You’re always waiting for the right moment, or creating the right moment. You watch your team and your opponents, and you think about the right pitch to throw, the right out to make—and if you watch them carefully enough, and practice hard enough, when that moment happens, you’re invincible.”

Eren had held on to his big brother’s buzzed head. “Mom says no one’s invincible.”

“Your mother wants you to stop picking fights.” Zeke looked up at him. “If you thought them through a little more carefully, maybe you’d win more.”

Eren remembered sticking out his tongue.

“You can’t win if you don’t fight.”

Years later, Eren glared at the plate he was holding and its chipped rim.

Petra was smiling at him with laughter dancing in her eyes.

“Recovery’s about us, Eren. Not what we did or what we got hooked on. Who we are as people. Just because it never technically broke doesn’t mean you can’t want it fixed.”

Eren didn’t know if he could have asked Mikasa, or Armin. Or Historia, because that answer was obvious and unhelpful. The question was all of the things he never should have let himself turn into, and it curled around his tongue like acid.

But he could ask Petra. He could ask the woman who’d made his mom believe in him a little by giving him the will to stick out every meeting when all he wanted was to burn everything he knew to the ground.

“Don’t you ever get tired of trying to fix things?”

Petra let the laugh out and squeezed Eren’s wrist.

“The secret to that,” Petra said, “is that’s what all those people you’ve already fixed things with are for.”

----

Eren taped a bagged cookie to Zeke’s apartment door.

An hour later, he had a text.

Outsides were a little scorched. You shouldn’t leave them in that long.

---

they weren’t even my cookies. i didn’t cook them, petra did.

what does he know about scorched

the first ones she made tasted like charcoal briquettes

these were so much better

like food

but go off i guess

In retrospect, spitting out a bunch of angry texts during Mikasa’s class hours and expecting it to help wasn’t the smartest thing Eren could have done. When his phone finally told him she saw them, he could practically hear the concerned silence reaching out his way and asking if someone needed to call someone for him.

I’m not on drugs, Eren clarified. Slightly less annoyed and remembering that Mikasa wasn’t used to non sequitur rants. Usually Armin got those. Because usually they weren’t about Zeke.

Mikasa finally type a response. I believe you.

Zeke’s just an asshole

               Yes.

petra worked hard on those cookies she bought new measuring cups

[…] […] Who is Petra?

friend

               Why did you give Zeke one of her cookies?

it was supposed to be therapeutic

               Oh.

Eren had known Mikasa for enough years to see her eyes tracking back to the beginning of the conversation and to know she was hearing all his words in exactly the intonation he’d stamped them out with. That was why he usually texted Armin. Armin’s judgment was in quiet sighs that passed quickly. Mikasa’s stuck around with the reminder that some people had no problem being their best self every second of every day.

               […]                I have time. If there are any cookies left, I could come over and take some for myself and Armin.

No offer of Eren coming over to their place, which used to be his place. He didn’t know if the tightness in his chest was frustration or gratitude.

really?

               Yes.                Your friend’s efforts should be appreciated.

[…] thanks i’ll let her know you love them

A grand total of one personal growth point coming from trying to reach out to Zeke, and it came from bonding with someone else over how badly it was going. Eren held his phone to his forehead and did the breathing exercises that didn’t work.

At least Petra had been right about the secret trick to it. Even if it wasn’t much of a secret. Eren’s friends had always been better than him at getting him out of the holes he dug himself.

----

“Is that real?”

“Pinch me, right?”

“No, I mean is that…”

“Yeah.”

“She’s…”

“I know.”

“I didn’t know she could do that.”

“You’re both assholes,” Ymir said. Doing nothing to change the surreal scene playing out in front of them. Her comment barely touched it. She was still bent over her bike, water bottle still held by nothing but her teeth, phone still in her hands, smiling. Genuinely. Not smirking. Not snarling or cackling or leering. Smiling.

It was one of the most unnerving things Eren had ever seen.

That covered a lot of ground.

“I thought… She’s fighting with Historia?” Eren asked.

He’d called for a break, and the first thing Ymir did after vaulting off her bike and pulling at her phone at the speed of sound was announce to the entire trail, “Eren, your jackass roommate just called me unromantic and shallow.”

Reiner was grinning like a maniac. For a guy who’d almost fallen over getting off his bike, he looked downright perky. Eren had worried he’d pushed things too far, but the bounce in his step when he flipped his water into his hands said otherwise. “She is.”

“But she’s smiling.”

“Yeah.”

“She looks happy.”

“She does.”

Someone Reiner’s size shouldn’t have been capable of giggling, but Ymir was already breaking Eren’s sense of reality. Reiner joining in wasn’t that different, and at least Reiner looking happy was something Eren could appreciate well enough for it to spread.

“What about Historia?” Reiner asked, letting his voice carry with a more direct grin at Eren. “How does her side of the fighting go?”

Eren had trouble thinking about the ongoing argument seriously without remembering tears and track marks. He couldn’t see the lighthearted moment staying if he brought that up. Ymir helped him out for once and didn’t rise to the bait. She rolled her eyes and took a sip of water by bending her entire head back instead of sparing a hand from her phone. “Historia? That’s really her name? Who hates their kid that much?”

Moment ruined anyway. “Don’t message her that,” Eren said sharply.

Ymir’s fingers had been waiting, not typing, but they stopped anyway. Her responding look saw through Eren and any past lives he or anyone in his general vicinity had lived, and Eren hated to admit it but he liked the smile more. He glared steadily back.

Her eyebrow quirked up. She tilted her head back for another drink. “Someday,” she said, “I’ll meet drug addicts who don’t have parental problems.”

“Eren likes his mom,” Reiner said, impervious to the tone shift.

“Sometimes.”

When he’d gone over to the house for dinner, she’d told him his hair was getting too long, and he should do something about it if he planned on running around so much.

“Now watch him not ask about the other times,” Ymir said.

Eren’s hackles rose. “There’s nothing wrong with my mom,” he said. “She’s the best.”

Ymir rolled her eyes so hard they practically landed in the back of her skull, and Eren didn’t know what was going to come out of her mouth next, but he’d probably want to punch her for it, and he needed to find somewhere safe for his helmet if that was how this was going to play—but they were both interrupted.

Her phone buzzed again, and the bizarre, reality-melting snap of joy that flashed over her face made Eren feel weirdly guilty about imagining what it would look like with a bloody nose.

He flopped his damp hair out of his eyes and slumped over his bike, watching a bird hop along the trail in front of them with a deep scowl that was fake enough to only make it through the third hop and the bird pecking at a piece of bread larger than its head.

That was a kind of happiness he could get. Hunger and feasting on things he wasn’t supposed to.

Eren swiped away more of his hair and looked down at the ground underneath his feet instead.

Reiner’s feet, done stretching, padded over the dirt, and his massive shoulder nudged Eren’s.

“You work at Steady Rock, right?”

Eren glanced up, because topic changes with Reiner felt safer with eye contact. “Yeah?”

“We got our hands on some coupons and wanted to know if it’s cool if we drop by during one of your shifts,” Reiner said, leaning further into Eren’s personal space than he was used to when they had somewhere larger than a cell to roam around in. “My little cousin is really into climbing right now, and she’s coming out for a visit in a few months. Scouting out places that might keep her attention is a pretty high priority before she gets here.”

Eren asked the obvious question. “Your family’s letting you watch her?”

Reiner didn’t quite look at him, and Eren wasn’t enough of a bastard to force it. “Her parents are coming along,” he said. “We’re only getting a few hours with her. But we want to show her a good time, you know? Convince them to let her back.”

Eren had spent every moment at work since Hannes’ latest discount series wondering how hard it was not to spend forty minutes of a promised hour falling off things and screaming about it, but Reiner would at least let him get a word in before he sped up a wall and got stuck. He snapped his helmet back on and shrugged. “Customers are customers,” he said.

Reiner chuckled. “Yeah, just… you know.” He cleared his throat and the next words sounded like they came out of one of the countless recovery books they’d both been forced through before their release. “Trying to respect your boundaries.”

They both looked Ymir’s way. She didn’t snipe anything back, too busy glowing.

Eren checked his watch to see how close to ending their break time was, pausing when he saw the clock over the running timer. He looked back up at Ymir, and the glint in her eye that said whatever was putting it there was ongoing.

“Time to head out?” Reiner asked.

It was a little early, but Reiner was breathing easily, and hadn’t gone after his water like the ravenous wolf he’d started out on these expeditions. “Yeah,” Eren said, one more quick, curious frown at his watch before Reiner called out to Ymir to cut her flirting short.

Weird.

He’d figured bad weird, since neither of them really knew how to talk to people and their starting point was all the yelling Eren wasn’t supposed to do anymore.

He slipped out his phone for a fast text, then put it away and got back to work, a little spark of okay beating out the worry and lightening his pedals.

----

i can’t text you during class, but ‘melancholic genius’ crystal wick can?

She doesn’t have my number. […] She was using Twitter.

----

It wasn’t because of what Ymir said.

Not really.

He would have done it anyway, eventually. She just brought it up when he was stable enough to do something with the reminder instead of stew in sad, guilty feelings that planted visions of pills in his head.

Eren scuffed his shoes on the welcome mat.

“The Doctor is Out,” it read, a sad smiley from a waiting room pain scale next to it, “But You Can Come In!”

Zeke had bought it. Eren had whined about how much time their dad spent at the office. The next day, it was on the doorstep, and his mom was telling his dad that they’d get rid of it when it stopped being accurate. Eren had said that wasn’t right, because they never told the people who knocked on their door to come in.

His mom never got rid of it, and it was back to being accurate. The doctor was out.

Before Eren could drown himself too deeply in that and why the mat wasn’t there when he came over for dinner, his mother opened the door.

“Eren,” she said. “This is a surprise.”

She looked worried behind her welcoming smile, but the kind of worried that made him want to stomp off and find a mud puddle to splash in out of spite. That kind of worry he could handle, even if it always ended with her trapping him in the laundry room and explaining how to get stains out of his clothes.

Eren rubbed the back of his neck. “Yeah. Sorry. I can call ahead next time.” His shoes crunched over the welcome mat. “I didn’t know if I had to. I still have my key and I’m not here to…” He sucked at this. Worse than any text to Historia about which chart smiley she’d pick out for her mood of the day. His ears hurt listening to himself.

“I thought I’d patch up my bedroom,” he said. “I was going to do it even if you weren’t here, so I didn’t call.”

His mom raised her eyebrows at him. “You never need a reason to call your mother, Eren.” Before the barb sunk in enough for Eren to come up with a retort, she swung the front door the rest of the way open. “Did you bring tools with you, or are you borrowing?”

Eren followed in, the bag he’d brought along swinging from his shoulder. “Borrowing for anything that needs paint. I thought I’d use what’s left in the garage for that.”

“And this isn’t going to be like the last time you tried to fix the house by yourself?”

Eren’s ears and the rest of him went a very fine red.

He and Armin had lost an action figure down a sink. They knew if Zeke wasn’t the one watching them, there wasn’t a good chance of anyone deciding that the toy’s fate was anything but sealed, so turning up the volume on the movie that had inspired the soldier’s sink dive, they’d searched the house for a saw to crack open the pipe they were sure it was stuck in.

Eren could still feel the weight of his soaked t-shirt as he tried to hide Armin behind him in the puddle they’d created, his mom’s hurried footsteps rushing down the stairs at their yelps of surprise.

The main puddle showed up because they’d tried to fix the first without anyone noticing. Armin had slipped and almost hit his head when he had the idea that they could probably find instructions in a book somewhere, and if they were really fast…

They weren’t fast, and they weren’t quiet, and Eren’s mom had rolled in like thunder.

“Never,” she had said, holding him by the chin while his wrench clattered to the floor and the pipe kept spewing water all over the three of them. “Eren you listen to me. You are never to use tools like this by yourself. You find me, or your father, and if something needs to happen, we will use them, or show you how. You never try something like this on your own.”

Most of his parents’ ‘nevers’ didn’t last long. Loopholes or exceptions followed Eren around like weeds.

That one stuck. For Armin. The first time they’d had a problem in their apartment, they’d called home, just to double-check, before getting to work. It stuck worse when Eren’s mother snatched the phone from his father, who’d picked up, and told them to talk to their landlord before they took another step.

Which had come up before she shouted it into their ears. But then they’d had diagrams, and measuring tape, and Mikasa loaned them a hammer, and they could probably fix it by themselves.

The landlord hadn’t agreed.

Walls weren’t so hard, though. Patch jobs were one of the first home improvement lessons Eren’s dad put him through. He’d thought the house could use fewer holes, and taught Eren early. Eren could tackle walls alone. Even if they were his, and he had to walk by a closed door that made his heartbeat hit deafening and his breathing fall short to get to them.

Five minutes in, standing in the gaping mausoleum of a room that didn’t have any of his stuff but had scars all over, Eren wasn’t alone.

His mother, recently changed into what she called her work clothes, entered the room and went for the spackle.

“Mom,” Eren said. “What are you doing?”

“Putting my house back together,” she said.

“It’s my room.”

“You don’t live here anymore.”

“Yeah, but it’s my room. My—” damage. Everywhere. The holes from the fist he’d put through the wall, the hole from Zeke’s baseball going through the wall, the cracks from all those holes spiraling out and trying to link together, the tiny bits of plaster on the floor… Eren had stopped remembering his room had ever looked another way, but he knew those things weren’t supposed to be there. That was why he was patching them up.

His mother didn’t seem concerned with any of the emotional progress being waged. “I have a right to participate in my own household chores, Eren,” she said.

“You haven’t done anything about this for months,” Eren said. “You left it out for me to clean up.”

“Because,” she approached a crack by Eren’s elbow that hadn’t come from a punch, just a bad nightmare that felt like it cracked his skull just as badly, “any man I raised should expect to have to come back and clean up his messes.”

She ran her fingers over the mark before taking her putty knife to it. When she looked up at him, Eren realized he’d stopped working to stare. He realized it a second too late to escape the nudge of her hand on his arm, prodding him along.

“I did think you’d be along sooner,” she continued. “Am I that far down your list?”

Eren’s face burned.

He could feel her smiling next to him, and he wasn’t surprised when the next nudge was his mother reaching up to tweak his ear. “Or,” she continued, “am I not on your list because I’m your mother, and you don’t think you have to apologize to me?”

“I know you like apologies,” Eren said defensively.

“And I know how much you love giving them to me,” she said.

The rebuke was as gentle as she bothered with, but it still stung. Eren’s hands stopped again, and he stared into the wall, the crack he’d have to tend after the hole acting like a window into a whole different dimension. One where the only reason he knew he saw his mother that day was because he could remember shouting at her.

“Mom,” he started, all the good intentions and work ethic bleeding out into guilt. “I really—I...”

The words felt as hollow as his room did without pieces of him taking up the space.

“Fix the walls,” his mother instructed. “Then you can stay for dinner and tell me how Armin and Mikasa are doing. They stop by even less often than you do. Or that roommate of yours; we’ve hardly spoken. Frieda seems to be the only one of any of you who can remember her social niceties.”

“Mom.”

----

Petra would tell him that there was nothing wrong with starting out easy.

He didn’t know where to start with his brother? Mother was in the same ballpark, and as long as he kept taking steps forward, he’d get to where he needed to be in the end. There wasn’t anything wrong with baby steps.

There was maybe something wrong with thinking of his mother as one. He’d never been a great son.

Eren, stinking of paint and supposed to be going to wash off before dinner, was stuck in front of the closed door marking the center of the upstairs hallway. The midway point between Eren’s room and his parents’. The office.

Otherwise known as the gateway to most of Eren’s fits when he was younger.

“But why. Dad has two rooms I can’t go in, why does he get two?”

At the funeral after-party, the door had been open. No one had bothered closing it after his dad changed his mind and agreed to come along to the MMA tournament finals. Eren had told him he needed to see it, because he was going to come in first place for the first time, and maybe after he could talk to Mom and change her mind about how rough it was because it wasn’t really that bad…

His dad was the one who decided if the door was open or shut. He’d left in a hurry, so he wouldn’t be late. So the day of the funeral, it was open.

Eren had slammed it shut with his crutches.

Baby steps. Closing up walls. Cutting off some of Ymir’s ammunition.

Eren watched his spackled, paint-covered hand reach out and turn the doorknob.

On slow feet, he took a step in.

He immediately wanted to step back out. The blinds were drawn. They were thick, wooden shades designed to tell the sun its service was not wanted, and the entire room was plunged into night despite it being the middle of the day. Light from the downstairs windows was still bouncing its way upstairs.

None of it touched the office.

It smelled like dust. Eren could feel his shoes leaving prints in the carpet.

He’d never been allowed inside without his father’s permission, so by the time he was five, he knew the ins and outs of the room better than any other place in the house. He knew before he could reach which certificate on the wall stood for which achievement, even with every inch being covered. Whenever his dad received an award, Eren would talk him through which spot of the office had the most room to put it in.

Armin had hidden under the desk with him. Hide and seek. They were willing to risk it when Zeke was sitting for them. Then he’d turned that back on them and found them the second after he was done counting.

Eren wouldn’t fit under the desk anymore. It was big enough for one man and the work in front of him. Plus the piles on either side. There wasn’t much extra space. The picture frames on it were pushed all the way to the edge of the wood.

It might have fitted more if the back of the desk was against the wall, but his dad had liked it in the middle of the room, his chair facing the doorway. Eren had figured out, staying up late and listening to all the different footsteps in the house, that he liked it that way so he could stand up and pace in front of the window.

Baby steps.

Eren breathed in through his nose, exhaling slowly. His legs wobbled like they were trying to go back to the last time he’d entered the room. He was, but not like that.

In, out, dinner.

He passed the desk and went over to the corner, where the largest filing cabinet in the room stood. Without stopping to think about it, he dropped to the floor, cobwebs and dust joining the paint. If it was the other way around he’d have to come back and wash the floors.

Back in the far corner of the shadows, there wasn’t enough light for anything to glint back at him, but he’d always had what his mother called an overactive imagination. Nothing close to Armin’s. That defense had never worked.

He reached his hand into the dark and flicked off whatever bug tried to latch onto his fingers, groping around until his palm connected with a piece of cold, round metal.

Eren almost yanked his hand back out without collecting it. A flinch wracked his body like a shiver.

He grabbed it, and pulled his arm back into his chest, the rapid thump of his heart covering up all of the other sensations that came with it. His forehead was clammy, bangs sticking to it like glue.

He stayed on the floor for a few more minutes than he meant to.

Long enough for his ears to catch a different thump.

The lamp in the opposite corner of the room flicked on, and after an aborted pause that Eren could feel, his mother stepped over the threshold.

“Eren? Did you hurt yourself?”

“No,” he lied, into the dusty carpet.

She sighed, but didn’t walk any closer. The floorboards creaked under her stationary feet. Eren’s fist clenched around the object in his hand, and he made himself push his body back up, taking a string of cobweb up with him and blinking under the new light.

His mother did step forward when she caught sight of the new collection of dust all over his clothes. “Eren.”

“I already had to change,” he said.

She shook her head and pulled a dust bunny out of his hair. “You really do need to get it cut.”

Eren would blame the environment for why the only thing that he could think to say, and successfully made it out of his mouth, was, “Dad had long hair.”

She fixed him with a look that he had spent his entire childhood rebelling against. “Yes, and your father took care of his,” she said, coaxing strands of his hair apart with the tips of her fingers. “If you don’t know what to do with it, having more is always a mistake. All that exercise you do; doesn’t it get into your eyes?”

Eren crossed his arms and avoided eye contact. Longer bangs helped.

Only the angle he put his head at meant he was staring straight at the photos his father kept on his desk.

The dust blurred the images, but he didn’t have any problem recognizing the candid shot Mikasa had taken at graduation. Of him and Zeke grinning at each other, the summer sun beating down on both of them while Eren wielded his diploma like a relay baton.

Eren’s folded arms fell to his sides, the cold weight in one starting to feel hot enough to burn.

“I wasn’t going to stay in here,” he said. The words rang. He fumbled his grip and held the object out to his mother. “I wanted to grab this. In case you wanted it.”

His mother, full of smiles and competence for him all day, froze. She didn’t need any of the seconds Eren had when he’d raged into the room and found it waiting on the desk. She recognized the polished shine instantly. The watch she’d given her husband for their twentieth anniversary.

The one he’d died wearing, while his son listened to the ticking clock and stopped trying to be sane.

The one his son had picked up and thrown into a dark place no one would ever think to look.

His mom’s hands shook, taking it out of Eren’s hands. He didn’t think she saw the cracks in its face. She couldn’t know to imagine the blood entangling its joints. She just took up the watch, and held it the same way she’d held it out to Eren when she picked it up from the store. Asking for his opinion while Eren shrugged and told her to bother Mikasa with stuff like that, it looked fine.

“It was already broken,” Eren said. “From the accident. I didn’t help, but… it stopped working in…”

She looked away from the watch and up at his face. Eren bit the inside of his jaw, staring at the picture of him and Zeke and thinking about how hot that day had been and how no one except Armin had been interested in a color that wasn’t black for their robes.

Then he wasn’t staring at the picture, because his mother’s hair was in the way, and her arms were wrapped around him. She tugged his head down to meet her shoulder, and she smelled like sweat and paint and mom.

The tears couldn’t make it past his choked throat.

“I told Frieda I couldn’t even miss him,” Eren whispered. “I was too busy thinking about myself.”

His mother’s soft laughter buzzed his ear. “You got that from him.”

Eren would have pulled away if that didn’t mean leaving the hug. He didn’t think he was strong enough to ask for another. “What?”

She laughed again, kissing the side of his head and rocking him slowly back and forth. “Your father,” she said, “was a passionate, driven man, and he’d get so caught up in what he was doing I sometimes think if he didn’t sleep better in his bed he’d never have come home at all. It was always the next step, with no reason to look back.” Her head turned towards the desk. “That’s why he never made things right with your brother. He thought he failed so badly, there was no reason to repeat it all. Instead he tried to move forward with the damaged parts they had left, and…”

She sighed so heavily Eren wished he’d been the one to start hugging her. She pulled away slightly, tenderly smoothing back his hair and curling it around his ears. “I like to think we both had a part in raising that out of you, no matter how little you enjoy apologizing to your mother.”

“Mom,” he said, “I am so—”

“Eren,” she interrupted. “You have never been an easy child.” She cradled his cheek in her hand. “It is always something, even when you’re supposedly a grown man so far above our responsibility.” She sighed at him again, displacing the glinting tears in her eyes and using her thumb to rub away his. “I can’t say I’m happy with how you chose to be difficult this time, but… your father was a wonderful man, and truth be told, I don’t know how to be without him either.”

Eren fell forward, holding her as tight as he knew how and hiding his eyes in her paint-stained shirt. “…You’re doing better than me,” he mumbled.

“I’m your mother,” she said. “That’s my job.”

[next]

[juminsmysticmc]

Forever with you - Saeyoung’s version

@roxinhonani said: Okay i got one, it’s only for seven or jumin though (or both if you end up liking it). Mc dies while giving birth. When their kid is four or five years old, they are drawing alone in their room, when jumin/seven go to check up on them they see a drawing that looks a lot like mc, when they never showed any picture of her to them. When they ask who is it they simply say that it’s their ghost friend that they talk and play a lot. (Summing it up: their kid is a medium) Very angst with happy ending

Ahhh I love these kind of requests! Mhh, I‘ve decided to do both, I hope you like it! Although, once again they are on a different post XD

,,Who‘s the most romantic couple?!“ he asked you.  ,,Aish, just let me sleep...“ you chuckled.  Saeyoung observed you for a few seconds, your big belly made him smile happily.  But somehow you looked odd today.  ,,Hey...“ he mumbled.  You sheepishly opened your eyes.  ,,Hey, hey, hey! What’s wrong?“ he asked you over and over again and quickly approached you.  You were burning, almost sweating.  ,,Mc! What’s wrong?“ he tried to keep you awake with a conversation but it was no use.  ,,I feel so sleepy...and sick...? I don’t know Saeyoung....“ you whispered and closed your eyes again.  Saeyoung took this as an alert and quickly called his brother to help him to get you into the car.  As soon as the three of you arrived a few nurses took you away in an hospital bed, this was the last time he saw you. 

,,We can’t explain what went wrong. We‘re sorry for your loss.“ the doctor mumbled.  Saeyoung couldn‘t stop crying, his heart was breaking.  ,,Would you like to at least see your daughter?“ the doctor asked.  Saeyoung shook his head.  ,,I don’t want to see the corpse of my daughter.“ he sobbed, deeply hurt by the loss.  ,,No Sir, she survived.“ the doctor tried to explain.  A light of hope enlightened his heart when he heard that his daughter survived.  The sight of the brown haired baby warmed up his heart, she was still so tiny and already lost her mother..... 

Seven years later the three of you moved.  The little girl was about to become seven and was currently choosing her decorations together with her daddy and her uncle.  Somehow she was crazy for angels.  Her room was so beautiful and what scared the both the most was that ever since she could speak she told them her wishes herself.  As if someone was telling her what to buy, ask for and how to place the stuff.  It was creepy but the two men weren’t thinking about it.  ,,We still need to buy coconut milk.“ the girl said and looked at the boys.  ,,Why, my precious daughter?“ Saeyoung asked her.  ,,Well, I  have to bake a cake....cookies as the basic and then a white cake with a marmalade filling.“ she explained.  Saeyoung and Saeran couldn’t believe their ears.  ,,Did Aunty tell you to do that?“ Saeyoung asked her.  ,,Aunty? Aunt Jaehee? No. Why should she?“ the girl laughed and went away.  At first she went into the wrong direction but then she mumbled something like ,,Oh, is that so?“ and turned around. Saeyoung hated the simply thought but sometimes his daughter was weird.  ,,She resembles Mc so much. Her style, her hairstyle, everything and she doesn’t even know what her mother looks like.“ Saeran mumbled. 

The girl‘s birthday was one of the hardest days for everyone.  It was a sad day but also a day to be happy.  But most of the time Saeyoung relived the day, your sick figure and then the notice of your death.  ,,Good morning, sunshine! Happy birthday!“ he opened her room and stepped in.  A beautiful drawing on his daughter’s desk caught his eyes.  The toys he played with her yesterday were put in alphabetic order again, even through she couldn’t read yet.  ,,Mhm? Mommy….? Oh, it’s you, Daddy! Good morning!’’ she smiled and hugged her dad.  Saeyoung smiled at her and then asked her if she drew the picture.  ,,Yes! Do you like it? My Ghost friend told me to draw! But sadly she said that you can’t meet her…’’ she mumbled apologetic.  Saeyoung nodded and kept asking her about her toys.  ,,Yes! She told me how to put them in the right order! Sometimes she even reads me books! Or last day she told me how to tidy up my room or decorate it! We always play!’’ she laughed happily.  Saeyoung didn’t need to ask more, he already understood that it was you. You were always by her side and by his side, he knew.  ,,Tell me more about this amazing friend of yours, my love….’’ he smiled with a trembling voice and sat next to her, enjoying the stories she was telling him. 

Jumin’s Version HERE 

[perditaalottachocolate-blog]

L’espoir

Summary: When the fire breaks on the roofs of Notre Dame there’s not much Ladybug and Chat Noir can do. No jewel in Master Fu’s case can assist them today. But then they are reminded that even in the darkest times there’s always hope. Hope as fragile as the wings of a butterfly, yet powerful enough to vie with fate.

AO3 / ff net

A sincere thank you to @tempomental-fanfics​ for beta-reading this story, as well as to Tempo, @lilaflyy​ and Remasa for brainstorming with me.

Tears stung her eyes and rolled down her mask and cheeks, marking their path with sooty lines. She no longer knew if they came from the smoke or from her helplessness. Because Ladybug failed Notre Dame, she failed Paris for the first time in years.

Chat grabbed her hand, grounding her firmly in place when she wanted to return to the roof once again.

‘We’re superheroes, my Lady,’ he whispered hoarsely. He got his fill of smoke in the last hour or so. ‘But we’re not fireproof.’

She clenched her teeth and squeezed her eyes shut to stop the tears from coming.

‘This is beyond us now,’ Chat Noir said. His thumb rubbed soothing circles over her forearm.

She didn’t notice when she drowned in his embrace, powerless and defeated. He held her and purred softly under his breath until her shoulders stopped shaking and her weeping subsided to the occasional sniff.

‘You’re almost out of time again, Bug,’ Chat whispered into her ear at the fourth beep of her miraculous. ‘Tikki needs to recharge. You both need to rest.’

Ladybug nodded quietly and withdrew from the hug. She disappeared in the first archway she found to release her transformation and fed the tired kwami. But she couldn’t keep away for long.

Marinette slipped into the crowd while Tikki munched on the last cookie in her purse. She watched in grave silence, side by side with anonymous Parisians, as the sight of her childhood, one of the oldest symbols of Paris, burned in the fading light of sunset.

There had been plenty of things she had tried, but nothing had worked. Lucky Charm after Lucky Charm failed spectacularly. And even if some of them succeeded in keeping the fire at bay, they disappeared with her transformation -- freeing the raging inferno to prey on the ancient wood of Notre Dame’s roof. Miraculous Ladybug wouldn’t fix what an akuma hadn’t caused.

Ladybug and Chat Noir did what they could to make sure everyone was safe. They helped to carry out every piece of art that could be moved from its place. They assisted the firefighters in moving the heavy equipment as close as possible. They’d been warned not to try anything risky, because the old construction might not survive it.

There was nothing more to do but watch. And grieve.

‘This is not your fault, Marinette,’ a familiar voice spoke by her ear.

She turned around only to see Master Fu coming to stand next to her.

‘Sometimes even magic is helpless and fate laughs in her face,’ the old Chinese man said sadly. ‘There’s no jewel in my case that could assist us today.’

Marinette wiped the tears that gathered under her lashes and sniffed in defeat. This was the worst day of her life.

‘There is one that could help,’ Fu continued. ‘But it’s out of our reach.’

She raised her eyes to the guardian, a question she did not dare to ask freezing on her tongue when she spotted the akuma.

The butterfly fluttered industriously over the heads of the silent crowd.

‘No!’ She cried.

She wanted to scream her lungs out. Not now. Not over this. Was that man insane to choose such a moment?

Marinette wanted to stand in the way of the akuma. She wanted to warn people, she wanted to stop it, but once again she was too late. The cursed insect landed on the helmet of a fire crew sergeant and disappeared, causing a wave of black smoke to envelop the man.

She didn’t waste another second. She couldn’t fight the fire, but she could fight the akuma and the filthy Hawkmoth, who wanted to stab Paris in the back at her lowest moment. Using the commotion, she called on her red suit behind a kiosk and quickly returned, ready for battle.

Only there was no battle, no attack. The crowds watched in baffled silence as the akumatized firefighter hovered over the cathedral roof. He had transformed into a lean, agile figure, with leather clothes and harness over a chest that looked as if it had been oiled. His skin glimmered in the evening sky. The heavy makeup, including the generous amount of eye-liner and the beard that must have been oiled too, brought a circus artist to mind. The firefighter skipped over the construction, taking no notice of the flames licking his feet.

Chat appeared at Ladybug’s side and they both observed in astonishment as the akuma raised his hands. Two torches danced in them. The man swiped the items over the flames and the fire jumped from the burning roof to the heads of the torches.

The crowd gasped as the akuma stuck one of the torches into his mouth and...  ate the flame as if it was nothing more than candy floss. He licked his lips and repeated the action with the second torch. The roof under his feet was no longer on fire. Only faint wisps of smoke indicated it ever had been.

Fire Eater started to run over the Notre Dame rooftops and swiped his torches at the fire. He proceeded to eat the flames he gathered as if it had been a treat at a fair. A path of fumes marked his route, the remnants of the roaring beast.  

At last the rooftop of the cathedral was free of fire and the akuma entered the structure, apparently looking for something more to satisfy his appetite. He reappeared at the main entrance a few minutes later, licking his lips with gusto. He went straight for Ladybug and Chat Noir who had made their way to the front of the building. His belly must have been stuffed with all the fire he’d eaten, because it expanded visibly. Little beads of sweat gathered on his forehead.

Fire Eater paid the heroes a short bow, but when he opened his mouth to speak a purple outline appeared over his eyes.

‘He says that’s all he could do,’ the akuma rasped. Little wisps of smoke escaped his lips. ‘He says it doesn’t mean he’ll stop.’

Chat reached for Ladybug’s hand just in time to prevent her from taking out her yoyo.

‘Why?’ the feline hero asked.

‘He is a Parisian too,’ the man replied with a shrug. ‘This is the city of love, his love as well.’

The heroes watched as the torches disappeared from his hands. With one last look to the blackened walls of Notre Dame Fire Eater murmured, ‘He says you can purify the akuma now so that it doesn’t multiply.’

Once again dark smoke enveloped his figure and the butterfly broke free of its confinement. The firefighter collapsed to the ground. Chat was at his side in a blink.

With one throw of her yoyo Ladybug captured the akuma. She caught Master Fu’s gaze. Tears glimmered in his eyes and it was easy to guess why.

‘This is what the butterfly miraculous was meant for,’ the old man whispered. ‘This is how it should be used.’

Ladybug hesitated looking at her weapon. She felt the insect fluttering inside. The sign of help that came from the least expected direction. The proof, that there was a human on the other side.

Beside her firefighter crews were already entering the church. It was time to asses the damage, to clean and fix it. She felt so small in the face of such a tragedy. Sometimes even magic wasn’t enough.

Chat squeezed her shoulder. ‘You okay, bug?’

She shook her head remembering herself. She opened the yoyo and released the white butterfly.

‘Come on,’ her partner said. ‘I bet we can help them with the heavy lifting,’ he wiggled his brows.’

‘Good idea,’ Ladybug nodded.

She watched the butterfly until it got lost in the sea of people rushing into the cathedral. Everyone wanted to help.

Today we’re all Parisians, she thought as she allowed the crowd to carry her inside. A small smile tugged at her lips. Because despite all the damage the fire had done, it didn’t destroy the most important thing of all.

Hope. There was still hope.

*************

Author’s Note: L’espoir means hope.

I was shocked when I heard about the fire at Notre Dame, I was sad when I saw the pictures. This is my way of coping with events like that.

Those of you who know me, know that I don't believe Gabriel is a rotten villain beyond redemption. I want to believe this would have happened if there were miraculouses in Paris yesterday.

[meleuki]

Unexpected

Axl Rose x Reader

Warnings: SMUT

Word Count: 3,200+

A/N: Here is the Axl Rose Smut that I've been writing for ages. Lemme know if there is anything I can improve on! Enjoy!

I could faintly hear the screams of the crowd behind me. I ran through the halls of backstage, searching for the dressing rooms of Guns n Roses. I'd been there just earlier, maybe two or three hours ago, but it seemed that every minute that ticked by slowly made the halls surrounding the concert stage into a rabbit warren of rock n roll.

There were a few girls standing here and there, either smoking or drinking, their stocking clad legs open to the point where it got in the way of the stage crew who had to rush around trying to make sure nothing bad happened to the band during the show. I sighed as I rushed past the groupies, ignoring their disgusted sneering as my heavy boots stomped against the ground.

I'd been ready to leave not long ago, packing my van with all the tools and make-up I'd brought along for the boys. Each had their own box, their own supply of face paint. It was then that I realised I had completely forgotten Axl's make-up box in his dressing room. The red-haired man had been flirting with me the entire time I'd touched up his face. I'd thought it would only take 15 minutes or so, but it had ended up taking at least half an hour. I'd spent more time snarling at the rock star to keep his hands off my legs than applying powder to his face, and I had eventually given up and left the room, completely forgetting the box of make-up I had brought in.

I sighed as I finally reached his door, ignoring the 'keep out' and 'do not enter' signs. Luckily for me, I'd been given a key to the dressing rooms in case of moments like this. I slid the key that hung from a lanyard around my neck into the lock, turning until I heard the familiar click of the door. I was immediately greeted by the smell of cigarette smoke as I walked into the large room. My eyes falling on two girls sitting on Axl's couch, sucking on a cancer stick each, emitting the smoke that had clouded up the whole room.

I stopped in my tracks as the two groupies turned to me, confusion in their eyes, maybe a small amount of jealousy too.

I pointed at them, "Out." and then the door, "Get the fuck out."

One of them began blubbering as they stood up, "But Axl told us to wait here until he got back from the show—!"

I held my hand out, cutting her off as I marched further into the room, my boots slapping against the carpet with every step. The metal pins and chains that I had attached to the leather shoes smacked together, creating the distinct sound of metal on metal.

"I don't give a fuck what Axl said! I said, get out!" I yelled, taking a step towards them and basking in the way they flinched at my sudden movements.

I watched as they scrambled, nodding quickly, mumbling apologies as their barely covered assets disappeared through the dressing room door. I sighed, placing my hand on my forehead as another stress fueled headache rushed through me. I groaned, searching the room for the make-up case through my pain, the one and the only reason I had come back into the hell pit people called backstage in the first place.

"Wow, I never thought I'd see you bent over like that." Axl's deep voice cut through the air. My eyes closed as I took a deep breath in through my nose, preparing myself to turn around and see the red-headed man.

"Fuck you, Axl." I groaned, standing up slowly and turning to face him with a glare on my face.

"Two little ladies down the hall told me you shoved them out of here." Axl chuckled, wiping an already damp towel over his sweaty forehead. His eyes were glazed over, probably the effect of all the adrenaline he'd built up on stage.

I grunted, beginning to look around the room again. I couldn't stand being back here any longer, especially alone in a room with Axl. I could feel his eyes on me as I searched for my tools, roaming my body like I was some piece of meat.

I snapped my head around, eyes narrowing to slits as they connected with Axl's, "You mistake me for what I am not Mr Rose, I am no slut."

"And I don't expect you to act like one Miss (L/N)." Axl's soft tone surprised me, and I began to let my tense body relax under his gaze. His eyes were green, so green. They looked like one of those rivers that you would find hidden in the woods, his eyes shone like the water's surface. I could almost smell the earth around me as I stared at him.

I let out a sigh before taking a deep breath in through my nose, "I'm getting lost in your eyes." I admitted composedly.

"And yet, two minutes ago you were ready to punch me in the face," Axl smiled sadly, "I don't understand you (Y/N)."

"I don't understand myself, Mr Rose," I spoke formally, detaching my gaze from him. I grunted uncomfortably as I moved to the beaten up couch. There had probably been many nights where people had puked, split alcohol or even had sex right where I sat, but it was the most comfortable thing in that shitty room for the time being.

"Why do you... call me that?" Axl furrowed his eyebrows as he walked over to his make-up bench, running his hand through his red hair, "Mr Rose~."

Axl dragged out the name, smirking at the way it sounded in his mouth. I could tell by the way he smiled that all he had in his head was those filthy thoughts. Thoughts of me screaming out his name, maybe even calling him 'Mr Rose', like it was some sort of symbol, phrase, calling of the power he possessed over me. I'd even begun to think about it too.

I'd been doing his make-up earlier that day, I'd tried so hard to inhale the smell of him. The same thoughts I was having, now invading my mind like some sort of lustful disease. He smelt so damn good, mouth-watering and intoxicating, like a mix of home-baked cookies and cigarettes. It was the most addictive thing my sense of smell had ever picked up on, blessing me with the aroma of Sir Axl Rose.

I unconsciously drew a deep breath in through my nose. My legs crossed as my own head began reeling with intrusive thoughts, just like the ones I'd had earlier tonight. I shut my eyes, sighing as I let the dirty scenes play behind my eyelids. Moans and whimpers echoed in my brain, thrumming in my ears like a rhythmic drum beat, slowly speeding up until the song reached its climax. It played like a highlight reel.

"Because I work for you, it's formal," I answered, straightening my neck and readjusting the slouched position my body had fallen into during my seconds away in fantasy.

"You of all people should know that shit doesn't matter to me." Axl chuckled, lighting a cigarette as he leaned against the make-up counter, his knuckles going pale-white as he gripped the edges of the wooden surface with his sweaty hands. I could see something beginning to surface inside his eyes as he looked at me, taking long drags of his cigarette.

I stood up timidly, keeping my eyes locked on Axl's as I began to walk towards him. Every step I took was cautious, wondering if he would turn away or break out of the burning gaze we were both trapped in.

It didn't take long before I had reached him, my hands delicately taking a hold of the front of his sweat-stained t-shirt. I let out a shaky breath as we continued to stare at each other. All I could smell was the smoke of the cigarette that hung out of the singer's mouth, oozing a grey river of toxicity. I missed the smell of him.

"What're you doing?" Axl mumbled, removing the white stick from his mouth before shoving it onto an ashtray clumsily. His hands shook slightly as they came back to his sides, not knowing whether or not to touch me just yet.

"I'm not entirely sure," I whispered, bringing my lips closer to his, so close I could feel his breath tickling over the chapped skin.  

"Then, um - are you sure you should be doing it?" Axl's voice lowered to match mine, his hands finally finding their way to my body and resting on my waist as the question rose up from his parched throat.

The question lingered in the air for a few moments and all that could be heard was our wavering breaths, uneven and rapid as our unspoken need for each other grew with each passing moment.

"Not at all." I sighed, pressing my body into Axl's, basking in the way his hands tightened their hold on me like he was restraining himself from taking me right then and there.

I decided I couldn't wait any longer and I smashed my lips against his. It was a fiery kiss, fueled by how long we had waited to make such an intimate connection. Axl's hands travelled from my waist and down to my ass, squeezing the muscle in his palms, shoving me further into him. I could feel his growing need against my leg, warm tingles spread through my body at the thought that he was getting hot and heavy for me, just like I was for him.

Axl’s lips travelled down from my lips to my neck, attaching themselves to the soft skin. I felt his teeth dig into me, pulling the skin into his mouth before licking it and letting it go. It was a constant movement of teeth and tongue against my neck as I moaned out for him, clasping his shirt tightly inside my fisted hands. My own nails had begun to dig into the palms of my hands, leaving crescent-shaped marks imprinted in the clammy skin.

When Axl brought his gaze back to mine his eyes were glazed, breathing laboured as he studied my eyes.

“I need to know you’re sure,” Axl spoke solemnly, his hand reaching up to caress my flushed cheeks. He slowly brushed my hair behind my ear, placing a light kiss against the curve of my jaw.

“I’m not sure what I’m doing, but I’m sure I want it.” I sighed as Axl connected his lips with mine again, sliding one of his hands to the front of my shorts and popping the button undone, quickly followed by unzipping the zipper. How could one man be so seductive?

His hand slipped past the elastic of my panties, slowly inching his way towards my core. His fingers dipped inside my folds, collecting the wetness I'd produced for him on his fingertips. I sighed at the contact, pressing my breasts into his chest, noticing the way his eyes focused on them for a few seconds before he turned to kiss me again.

This time he slid his tongue into my mouth, licking a line along the top row of my teeth, before massaging the pink muscle against my own. I felt him hum into the kiss as he moved his fingers up my slit until they rested on my swollen clit. He slowly began to massage the bundle of nerves, eliciting small gasps of pleasure from the confines of my lungs. The air around us was getting hotter by the second, waves of heat washing over both of us as we got lost in each other’s bodies. The room seemed hazy as Axl dragged his hand out of my pants, bringing his fingers to his mouth and cleaning up the mess I’d made.

Axl’s hands snaked their way around my waist, hoisting me up into his embrace as he walked us over to the couch. We both fell onto the old material with haste, wasting no time in scrambling to get to the opposite sex’s body. Our clothes were thrown across the room, long forgotten as our night continued on. The sweet smell of sex lingered around us, swallowing us whole as we dived for each other, lips making messy contact, teeth clashing harshly. Neither of us seemed to care, completely dismissing the pain as it came.

I swung my legs over Axl’s lap, straddling him. I groaned as he pressed his fingers into my hips, taking advantage of the new position and grinding his boxer-clad crotch into me. The feeling was euphoric, finally, some friction where I needed it most. My tits bounced along with the movements of Axl’s hips, creating some sort of rhythm for both of us. We probably looked like wild animals going at it, but the pleasure was too great to care, I just needed his body on mine and everything would be okay.

“Oh fuck,” Axl rasped, wrapping an arm around my waist and repositioning us, “goddamn.”

Axl swiped his tongue across his bottom lip, hydrating the swollen skin. I could basically feel the bruises on my lips already, slowly forming due to how rough our kisses had been. Axl’s hand were moving all over my body, caressing my thighs and hips. The calluses on his hands provided me with a rough texture to melt into, a feeling I’d never known but was happy to indulge myself in. His mouth was a killer, attaching itself to my perky nipples every so often, biting and swirling his tongue around the pink buds.

I slipped my hand past the waistband of Axl's boxers, teasingly brushing my fingertips against the hard tip of his cock. Axl’s jaw tightened at the unexpected feeling of pleasure, lips falling slightly apart. I ran my thumb over his leaking slit a couple of times before wrapping my fingers around the base of his member, beginning to stroke slowly. Quiet whimpers fell from his lips, rolling out of his mouth and into the space surrounding us, getting swallowed completely by the need pouring out of each of our pores. I rubbed Axl painfully slow, teasing him as much as I could before it got too much for us both.

Axl brought his lips up to meet my own hastily. I could taste his need as he kissed me, a silent beg for me to do something more, and I agreed without words, none were needed. My hands worked quickly at pulling Axl’s boxers down his thighs, eventually sliding them over his knees. I let out a small chuckle as Axl kicked the boxers of his feet, resting his hands on my hips with a small smirk.

I repositioned myself on top of Axl, getting into a comfortable position. I pressed my forehead against him, feeling how hot with anticipation he was getting. My hands slid their way to his shoulders as I began lowering myself onto him. A loud moan escaped my throat as I sunk down on his throbbing cock completely, clenching around him. Axl furrowed his eyebrows, a sharp intake of breath following soon after. My eyes fluttered shut as I tilted my head back at the feeling that I hadn’t experienced in so long, too long.

Axl began to move his hips upwards, testing the waters. I nodded at him as a signal that he could move as fast as he wanted, catching my bottom lip between my teeth as he picked up his pace significantly. My hips were surely going to be bruised tomorrow, as Axl was gripping them like they were his life support, guiding me as I bounced on top of him. I could feel my hands tightening around Axl’s shoulders, digging my nails into the pale flesh, hard enough to leave crescent marks for a few days after this encounter.

In the back of my mind, I hoped this wouldn’t simply be a one-time thing. I could feel myself slowly falling in love with this man as he fucked me. His hips rolling upwards to meet mine in a flurry of frenzied thrusts. I moved one of my hands up to Axl’s face, cupping his cheek in my hand as I stared down at him, uncontrolled moans leaving my lips. Axl looked up from where we were connected, his green eyes alone making me shiver in pleasure. His thrusts slowed down as we looked at each other, getting lost in the feelings of emotion-fueled sex - the best kind.

Axl’s hands shifted on my body as he moved to lay me down against the couch, staying inside me as we moved. My back rested on the cushions of the old couch as Axl slowly moved between my legs again, his hips bucking into me. My back arched slowly at the feeling of how deep he was inside me. I wrapped my arms around Axl’s neck, bringing his lips down to meet mine in a slow kiss. His hips rotated at a much slower pace than before, savouring every feeling that he was receiving and giving. My fingers tangled themselves in his hair, playing with the strawberry blonde strands. Axl’s thrusts were deep and hard, timed just right.

Axl’s eyes met mine again, passion exuding from the pale green orbs. I felt the air change once again, something sparking between both of us.

“Faster,” I whispered out, clutching Axl’s hair in my fists, “faster.”

Axl complied, immediately bucking his hips at twice the speed he was going beforehand, faster than when we had first started. My eyes rolled into the back of my head at the insane rush of dopamine that released inside my brain, making my body go into overdrive as it twitched in pleasure. Axl groaned out as he worked towards his orgasm, fingers dancing across my clit, doing his best to get me there as well.

I cried out as my orgasm approached me like a race car on the track, crashing against me almost painfully. I threw my head back, gasping in pleasure as Axl’s hips began stuttering, his fingers maintaining the same pace on my bundle of nerves. Axl shouted as he too reached his climax, giving one final thrust as he finished, letting out a shout of satisfaction. I stopped Axl’s movements on my clit, my body starting to writhe with overstimulation from the contact of his fingertips.

Axl dropped his head into the crook between my neck and shoulder as we both came down from our highs, panting like we’d just run a mile. Our bodies stuck together with sweat as Axl let himself soften inside of me. I smiled as Axl brought his face out from hiding, looking into my eyes with a breathy laugh.

“I don’t think I’ve - uh, ever - um, connected with someone like… that.” Axl spoke, amusement was clear as day in his eyes.

“What, with sex?” I chuckled, watching the way Axl rolled his eyes.

“No, no,” Axl smirked at me knowingly, “you know exactly what I meant. I know you felt that too.”

I nodded, tucking some of Axl’s hair behind his ear, “Yeah, I know what you mean. I like that feeling, it was so... strong and - uh, intense.”

“Me too,” Axl sighed, pressing a kiss against my forehead as he lay down next to me, “I think it’s called love, honey.”

“I think it is, Axl.”

[winters-blue-children]

The first time he pretends not to see him. He wears the jacket with the soft, worn leather and a haunted look in his eyes. He sees him in his peripheral, and if he tries, he can pretend like he’s not really there at all.

There are random moments that slowly come into focus, blurry in the peripheral, clarity growing in the center until he can finally make out the unmistakable messy head of hair of Klaus Hargreeves. The smudged eyeliner and two day old stubble awakens a familiar longing in his gut.

Dirty, tattered clothes hang off of him in loose shambles and Ben knows for certain it’s his brother.

He flickers.

He’s never felt so happy to see Klaus. Why does it feel like ages since they had last spoken? He thinks to himself, Klaus doesn’t see him yet. But the other man tenses visibly, his beautiful green eyes frozen on nothing. Ben waits for Klaus’s sharp tongue. Waits for him to ask what the hell is he doing spying on him like a creep.

The question never comes.

Nothing does.

He flickers.

Then darkness.

~

He wonders why it’s been so long since he’d seen his family. Aside from Klaus, that is. It feels strange. Like something is missing. And when did it start snowing in June?

Klaus never approaches him. Never even acknowledges that he’s there. If he didn’t know better he’d think Klaus was avoiding him. They’re all avoiding him.

Did they have a falling out? It makes sense. He wanted to leave home, has wanted to longer than he’d care to admit. His brothers and sisters never wanted to hear it.

They all have their own problems. He’s sick of being ignored.

Klaus has mood swings worse than any hormonal teenager. The drugs don’t help. Over the years, the distance between them grows larger every single day. Neither of them make any effort to close it.

When they were kids, they were the closest of their siblings.

They were different. Even of the special ones, they were different, because they were the ones who were afraid. Ben, of the darkness inside him, and Klaus of the darkness around him. So they found solitude in each other.

Ben hates to admit that things have changed.

Klaus doesn’t talk to him anymore. At some point, he started looking for comforts elsewhere. He hides away in his room, sneaks out in the dead of night when he thinks the others can’t hear his footsteps creaking across the house, and comes back reeking of sweat and alcohol.

The drugs changed him. The pills and the coke, all washed down with a fifth of vodka.

It got so bad that Father refused to let Klaus go on missions with them.

Ben grows nostalgic when he remembers how things used to be, between them. When Klaus would wrap an arm around his shoulder and pull him close. A grin spread wide across his face and his eyes more clear than Ben had seen in years.

They would tell stories about how they would run away one day. Just pack up a backpack and leave. Take off in the middle of the night and never look back again.

They wouldn’t be alone. They would have each other. Always.

He used to dream. He used to—

~

There’s snow on the ground. Ben glares at it like it’s offended him personally. He always hated the snow. The shit turns to grey sludge on the ground, seeping into his shoes and freezing his toes.

He turns his head away from the window to his brother.

“What the hell are you doing?” He demands. “Who is this guy?”

Klaus doesn’t answer, but his crooked grin crinkles around his eyes at the sound of Ben’s voice.

There’s bare skin exposed, more than Ben would care to see.

There’s a man he doesn’t know, with rough hands and long, greasy hair tugging Klaus’s tight pants down his hips.

Ben hisses through his teeth.

Finally, Klaus’s gaze meets his own.

“You shouldn’t be here,” he says.

Ben’s frown grows deeper. His eyes flick to the dresser, where he sees neat little lines of coke residue, more evidence that Klaus is probably well on his way to getting fucked up.

He looks back to the bed and grits his teeth. He can’t look away, no matter how much he wants to. The other man is already rolling Klaus over. He’s about to see something he really doesn’t want to see.

Or so he thinks.

A moment later, he drifts, and then, nothingness—

~

When they were twelve, Klaus spent a lot of time in the mausoleum. Ben doesn’t want to imagine what he saw in there that changed him so much. He came back different. He was always a loud child. There was a life inside him that Ben was always drawn to. A brightness in his soul that Ben thought, hoped maybe, would act in contrast to what he has inside himself.

At some point, Klaus changed. He started lashing out, he became cruel and disenchanted. Lifeless without the pills and full of hateful venom with them. He was rarely vicious with Ben. But he started picking on Allison. He even started fights with Luther once or twice. Ben would find him afterward nursing a black eye and a split lip.

Diego called him a lost cause. Broken.

Ben didn’t want to believe that. He still doesn’t. What did Father do to him?

He thinks Klaus must be haunted by the spirits that he sees. He once suggested that he try to help them move on. Maybe then they’d leave him alone.

He was so scared. He was just a child. They all were.

~

Ben wants to see the world. He wants to travel to a place where no one knows his name. He spent his whole life trapped in the same house, with a father that he hated and siblings who rarely paid attention to him. Most days it feels more like a prison than a home.

He wants to see the water. He’d never even seen the ocean, aside from pictures in books.  

He wants to go with someone he loves by his side. They don’t need the money. They don’t need the fame. They would have each other and that would be enough.

They could be happy.

He’s sure of it.

~

He was always so different from Klaus. He often wondered why they were the closest of their siblings. Vanya was shy and quiet like him. She liked to read too. But he was never allowed to play with Vanya.

Something about Klaus drew him close like a moth to a flame. Even when he was in one of his toxic moods, throwing a violent fit or a tantrum, Ben would rarely leave him alone.

They were partners, on missions and in life. There was never any question about it. Number Four and Number Six.

“Leave him alone,” Father would say.

“He just needs some time to calm down,” Mother would say. “I’ll make some fresh cookies,” she adds as an afterthought.

He ignored Luther’s advice and Diego’s suggestions. He would sit and watch, a silent observer as Klaus slowly came down from his high.

He’d set out a glass of orange juice and a small plate of coffee cake. His brother always did have a sweet tooth.

This pattern went on for years.

Sometimes he feels invisible. Not invisible the way Vanya is.

But invisible like…  how the one person he wants to notice him… is too high to give him the time of day.  

~

Klaus is hiding something from him. Typical Klaus, always with so many secrets. Always sneaking out at night to buy drugs and get high. He got caught so many times stealing alcohol from Father’s liquor cabinet.

He never learned his lesson.

“Hi, Klaus,” he says.

The other man doesn’t answer. His eyes are red. Probably bloodshot from the drugs.

“Why aren’t you speaking to me?”

After a long pause, Klaus slowly raises his head. He wordlessly pops two blue pills into his mouth and follows it with a heavy gulp of vodka.

Ben watches silently the way Klaus’s throat bobs as he swallows.

He wants to be angry. He wants to throws something, break something. He wants to scream and shout and demand answers. Demand to know why he’s being treated this way. Like he hasn’t always been there when Klaus needed him. He wants to—

~

“We miss you, you know?”

Ben turns around at the voice.

“I miss you,” Klaus clarifies. “I…” He voice trails off and Ben silently begs him to continue.

It feels like his tongue is caught in his throat. And there’s a terrible knot in his stomach. It hurts something awful. His head is spinning too. What is going on? He can’t breathe. He can’t speak. He can’t even fucking move—

“I thought it’d be easier seeing you,” Klaus finally whispers.

Ben shakes his head. He’s so confused. Where is he? He doesn’t recognize his surroundings. Klaus is the only familiar thing in the room.

“It’s not.”

“Why—” Ben’s voice is a scratchy whisper. He tries again. “Why—”

Klaus shakes his head sadly. There’s such despair in his green eyes.

And then there’s nothing.

~

For a while, he drifts. He’s weightless, a faceless mask in a crowd.

He feels numb, like there’s a missing piece inside him. He thinks maybe he lost something really important but he can’t for the life of him remember what it is.  

He wonders if this is what Klaus feels when he gets high. He forgets all the important things in life. He forgets the bad things too. That was how he used to describe it.

Used to.

“What is going on?” Ben asks carefully.

“I want to—” Klaus squeezes his eyes shut and trembles. Ben aches to reach out and pull him into an embrace just like when they were kids, but he doesn’t dare. He’s afraid to scare him off. Klaus looks like the slightest breeze might make him take off like a frightened animal.

When Klaus finally opens his eyes and looks at him, they flash so bright that they burn a brand into his soul.

~

He feels like he’s screaming himself hoarse in a crowd, but no one hears him at all. No one even reacts.

He can’t feel himself. He can’t even feel the monsters that lurk under his skin. As a child, they terrified him. They kept him up at night. He never got used to it. Never got control over it, to the great disappoint of dear old Dad. Father called him pathetic.

He doesn’t feel like himself and he doesn’t understand why.

But he’s sure it has something to do with Klaus. His fucked up, messed up, mess of a brother. He’s sure Klaus is the reason for this.

He’s so tired of being ignored. He’s not strong like his brothers. He doesn’t have his sister’s ambition. He’s next to last in his Father’s eyes. He’s so tired.

Ben raises a trembling hand and waves at his brother.

He smiles softly as something devastating flashes across Klaus’s face. He doesn’t know how to explain the look of absolute loss on Klaus’s features. It’s heartbreaking, but he doesn’t stop smiling.

He shudders.

He flickers.

He’s still waving when he disappears.

~

Ben dreams of the ocean. Since he was a small child, he’d wondered what lurks in the depths of the water. He read about how there are monsters that live deep in the ocean’s dark waters. He used to read stories about strange creatures the size of a blimp, with no eyes and long, terrifying tentacles.

“Do you think I’m a monster?” He asked.

“Of course not,” Klaus said. “Why would you say that? Why would you even think it?”

No one else sees what he sees. It’s not just tentacles that emerge from his flesh. He sees a whole world full of monsters. He wonders if maybe he belongs there. And that the next time he pulls the monsters into this world they might take him back with them.

“You’ve seen what I can do. What—what they can do,” Ben said softly.

Klaus chuckled and reached for his hand. “You’re just Ben,” he said firmly. “You’re not a monster. You’re my brother.”

“I’ve seen monsters,” Klaus said, when Ben continued to look skeptical. “You’re nothing like them.”

Ben looked down at their hands, fingers entwined. He squeezed tight and nodded his head. He scooched closer on the bed and took comfort in being close and safe. Klaus grabbed a flashlight from the bedside table and with a grin, he threw a blanket over their heads.

They were just two young children hiding from the dark. But they had each other.

Always.

~

For the first time in a long time, Klaus looks surprised to see him. Almost happy, even. But Ben might just be imagining it. Wishful thinking, maybe. He ignores him and pretends not to notice the other man’s presence. After all, if Klaus is so keen to act like he doesn’t exist, why shouldn’t he deliver the same treatment?

They’re just a couple of stubborn bastards.

“Ben.”

And with the sound of his name on Klaus’s lips, it all melts away. Why does it feel like forever since someone had uttered his name? What has he forgotten?

He tilts his head and looks at him strangely. “Klaus.”

Then he frowns. “You’re high,” he says with a sigh. “Again.”

“Almost,” Klaus chuckles. He shrugs his shoulders. “Getting there anyway.”

Nowadays, Klaus is always high.

~

He misses Diego. Even with the rivalry between him and Luther that grows worse by the day, Diego was always nice to him. Like an older brother, nevermind the fact that they were all born on the same day.

He misses Allison.

He misses Mom’s home-cooked meals. He’d give anything for the smell of her pot roast to fill his nostrils again.

He tells himself it’s better that he got out. It’s better that he left. After all, he hated living in that house. He hated being forced to call the monsters and kill. He hated the blood and the violence. The demons that terrified him.

Father was an asshole, always was. He used him like a weapon, an object, rather than a son.

He wanted to get out. He wanted to leave.

He just didn’t want to do it alone.

And now, there’s Klaus again. So weird how he always shows up whenever Ben is feeling his loneliest.

“You want a drink?” Klaus holds out a bottle of vodka, only to pull it away just as Ben considers taking it. He laughs to himself like it’s the funniest shit in the world while Ben fumes and rolls his eyes at his asshole of a brother.

Klaus’s eyes are glazed and hazy. Ben wonders if it was the blue pills or the red ones this time. He pretends not to notice. He’s starting to get angry. Feeling pissed off is remarkably better than feeling nothing at all, he decides.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” He explodes.

Klaus has the decency to look shocked. “Wh-what?” He stutters and blinks.

Ben leaves before Klaus can act the innocent victim.

He’s tired of taking care of him.

~

He dreams of the ocean again. The dark water, peaceful on the surface, no telling what lurks within.

Klaus appears out of nowhere. “Can we talk?”

Ben looks behind him. “You should have come away with me.”

Klaus looks him up and down like he’s seeing him for the first time. He nods. “Yeah, I should have.”

Ben sniffs and turns away. “Goodbye, Klaus.”

~

God, he wants to get spectacularly drunk. He wants to get fucked up and forget everything. And why shouldn’t he? He’s seventeen years old. That’s what any self-respecting defiant teenager would do.

He thinks about his father’s extensive collection of pricey bourbon.

He thinks about the little baggie of pills in Klaus’s pocket.

He thinks about sneaking out of the house with Klaus. Maybe they could score a couple of fake IDs, sneak into a bar and get wasted. They could run away.

And if they run far enough, they could find themselves on the other side of the globe where no one knows their faces or names. They could get jobs, be normal . No more missions, no fate of the world resting on their young shoulders. Maybe he would get a degree. Literature maybe. He always wanted to be a writer.

What would Klaus do? What does Klaus like? Before the drugs, Klaus used to enjoy playing with model planes. Maybe he could do something with that.

Life wouldn’t be easy, but they would have each other. That’s enough. What else do they need?

None of this happens, of course.

~

The next time he sees Klaus, his brother grins at him.

Ben smiles back.

He runs away without Klaus. He hates leaving him behind in that abusive house, but Klaus didn’t want to go. He didn’t want to leave so Ben had no choice. He had no choice, he had to go, he had to get away, he had to—

~

A lifetime ago, Five told him about multiple universes. He explained how there are different dimensions that exist, multiple timelines crisscrossing each other and overlapping. Different lives even.

“There’s a universe where we don’t know each other,” Five had said. “A world where Hargreeves never adopted us. And we would all be strangers to one another.”

Ben was in awe at the time, just trying to wrap his head around a universe where he didn’t know his brothers and sisters.

“That doesn’t make any sense.” Klaus had laughed harshly when he told him. “Five is so fucking weird, don’t listen to a word he says.”

~

Klaus looks like shit. He’s pale and sweating, his eyes dart nervously from side to side.

“What the hell happened to you?” Ben asks.

Klaus grunts and bows his head, arms clenched tight around his stomach.

Ben looks around. He wonders what happened to the glass of orange juice he had put out for him.

“What is going on with you?” He asks. “The pills, the alcohol, the… the sex with random strangers?” He pulls a face. Why the hell has he seen so many people fucking his brother of late? And why hasn’t he questioned how fucking weird it is until now?

Klaus sniffs and groans, it’s a muffled sound with the way he's got his face buried between his knees.

“Are you going to talk to me?” Ben asks impatiently. “You know I just want to help you.”

Small, little pathetic sounds reach his ears and he realizes Klaus is crying. Why is Klaus crying?

Klaus is trying to say sometime but Ben can barely understand him. The sounds come with a mix of snot and tears. He can’t understand a word of it.

Ben wants to reach out, he wants to—

Klaus flinches away. “No, don’t.”

Ben snatches his hand back like he’d been burned.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” Klaus shakes his head furiously. He covers his ears with his hands and squeezes his eyes shut. “I can’t do this, I can’t do this, NO!”

“Do what?!—”

He flickers and then he’s gone.

~

He starts to wonder if he’ll ever feel anything again.

“You should get some sleep,” Ben says. And he means actual sleep. Not passing out in a mixture of pills and alcohol. Or vomit. “You look terrible.”

Klaus snorts and rolls his neck. “Even now, you’re still trying to tell me what’s best for me.”

Ungrateful bastard. Ben swears he won’t care if Klaus overdoses again. He won’t care at all. He should just stop thinking about him.

He’ll stop thinking about him and he’ll stop caring, and then it’ll stop hurting seeing him like this.

Except… he never stops.

It’s always Klaus. It’s always Klaus that he sees. It’s always Klaus that he wants to be with.

Always.

And it never stops hurting.

~

Ben can’t stop thinking about how Klaus apologized to him. While crying and sobbing with spit dribbling down his chin, he said he was sorry.

He wants to get angry. He doesn’t want to forgive him.

Except he can’t quite remember what Klaus was apologizing for in the first place.

He flickers again.

~

“Ben, wait.”

He refuses to look up.

“What do you want?” He asks harshly. He’s tired of being the nice one. The one who never gets what he wants because he’s a pushover. He always does whatever Father asks. He lets everyone walk all over him, including Klaus. He’s sick of it.

“Don’t go.”

“Where the fuck would I go?” He shouts.

“I—I don’t know.”

“I have nowhere to go, Klaus!”

Klaus shakes his head quickly. “You used to… you always used to talk about running away. Just, taking off in the middle of the night and… getting away from all of it. Just you and me. Together,” he says softly. “You didn’t care where we went, you just wanted to go. And for us to…”

“Be together,” Ben finishes for him.

“I wish—”  

Ben shakes his head, cutting him off. “We’re not—” He sighs suddenly, ending that thought. “It’s too late anyway.”

“How do you feel?” Klaus asks, out of nowhere. It’s just a strange question, coming from Klaus.

Ben furrows his brow.

“Strange,” he answers. “Kind of… empty. Not like myself.”

Klaus nods. He turns like he’s going to leave.

“I wish…” Ben starts. He closes his eyes and tries again. “I wish you would take better care of yourself, Klaus. You know I hate seeing you like this.”

But Klaus is already gone.

~

He’s somewhere peaceful. He’s not sure exactly where he is. It looks like a village, near a mountainside maybe. He can smell the green trees around him. He sees flowers, beautiful flowers. He closes his eyes and grins, feeling the sun on his face. He raises his arms and takes it all in. The sky is so blue. He feels warmth on his skin, the fresh air in his lungs.

He thinks this might be the place he was born.

He wonders how close he is to the water.

~

“I was thinking about what you said.”

“You’re going to have to be more specific than that.”

“About running away. Just you and me,” Klaus says. “We could go anywhere, to the end of the world even. Get away from this place. Go somewhere where no one knows us, and we can just… be.”

“Wait… why now?” Ben asks. It doesn’t make any sense.

“Why not?” Klaus laughs, a little bit nervous.

“It’s… it’s impossible.”

“Baby, nothing’s impossible.”

“Why are you saying this to me now?” Ben demands to know. “What’s changed?”

Klaus’s expression grows hard and furious. “Why is it so hard to believe that maybe I want this too? I want to get out of here too! This place is a nightmare! I—I feel like I’m suffocating here! Like I can’t breathe! And I… I miss you! Fuck! Goddamnit, I miss you!”

“I’m right here, Klaus,” Ben says slowly. “Have you been taking those green square pills again? Stay away from those, you know they seriously fuck with your brain.”

Klaus laughs then, a little hysterical.

Ben grins a bit too, he can’t help it.

“Whatever, he says. “You really want to go? You really want to—”

~

Klaus looks annoyed. He looks pissed off. Someone is shouting in another room. It’s hard to figure out who. The voices blend together in a rage. Is that Diego?

What are they fighting over?

Klaus doesn’t look at him, doesn’t even acknowledge his presence.

Ben sighs. This again.

Like always, he’s ignored unless he’s needed, for the horrors that lurk beneath his skin. Vanya sits quietly by the side, silent as a mouse.

He only wanted to get away from all of this. The fighting and the arguing. The misery. They weren’t a family, what a joke. They were a nightmare and the only escape is out the door without looking back.

But then Klaus looks at him and everything changes.

He wants to move on but he can’t. He wants to leave but something keeps him tethered. Because the look in Klaus’s eyes is silently begging him to stay.

But he wants to leave. He wants to see the ocean. He wants another life, away from all of this. This is his time.

“I think… I think this might be goodbye.”

“Why would you say that?” Klaus spits angrily. “There’s no such thing as goodbye. Not with me—you know that.”  

Ben frowns. “Do you hate me?” He asks.

“I don’t hate you! I could never hate you! I—”

~

“I thought—”

Ben cuts himself off as he watches the tears trail down Klaus’s face.

He trembles and shakes his head. “I thought we might have been—”  

~

Everything hurts.

Seeing Klaus like this hurts. The drug use gets worse. He feels genuine fear when he starts to see needles. And he only ever seems to see him when he’s coming off a high. Or going into one. Klaus’s eyes are dull. Lifeless. Nowadays, he’s barely skin and bone.

“I don’t want you to leave,” Klaus says softly. “I miss you, but—”

“But what?”

The snow is gone. He wishes he could go back to the mountainside. Where the hell is he?

~

“I never wanted this,” Klaus tells him. “I never wanted you to leave.”

“I’m still here,” Ben says dumbly.

An unreadable expression flicks across Klaus’s face. “I should have gone with you,” he says miserably. “Every single time you asked, I should have—”

“Why are you saying that?” Ben suddenly screams. “Just stop it! Shut up! You sound like an idiot! Just stop!”

Klaus stops.

The world trembles around them.

He can’t see—

~

His room looks the same.

His books are in a neat pile on top of his dresser. His uniforms hang in the closet. A pair of loafers sit next to the bed. Everything looks the same. But something is missing. Something's not right.

Why does it feel so different?

“No one touches this room.”

Ben turns at the voice behind him.

“Not even Mom,” Klaus says. “No one touches anything in this room.”

“Well, it’s my room, I should hope not.”

A ghost of a grin flickers on Klaus’s face.

He sees Diego behind his brother.

“What the fuck are you doing in there?” Diego asks.

“Just… remembering,” Klaus answers.

Ben blinks.

“Well, stop it,” Diego mutters before walking away.

Ben frowns. “What is he talking about—”

~

“You know, most people, when they lose somebody… they’re just gone, you know?” Klaus slurs at him. “But me?” He laughs, tragic and low. “I don’t know if I’m lucky or just… haunted.”

Ben grins. “Let’s go see the ocean. Come on, you and me.”

“Yeah?” Klaus suddenly perks up. “Right now?”

“Let’s go, right now!”

He shouldn’t get his hopes up, but Klaus is grinning at him and looking happier than he has been in years. Lights swirl around his vision. Klaus’s face blurs as he laughs and Ben can’t help but feel so fucking giddy.

“Okay, let’s fucking go! Let’s—”

~

Ben’s patience is wearing thin. He’s tired and frustrated. “Can we go outside, asshole? Fuck, maybe I never should have believed you in the first place.”

“Too bad,” Klaus spits. “Because here you are.”

Ben shakes his head and looks away. “Why the hell do I even bother?” He mutters to himself.

“You’re the one who left!” Klaus screams.

“I didn’t leave, Klaus! I’m right here! Why do you act like—”

“Shut up!” Klaus shouts. “Shut up, shut up, shut up!”

Ben flinches. Another Klaus tantrum. Great. It fades into the background, a storm of furious and raging emotion as their siblings arrive to see what the commotion is about.

“What the hell is going on, Klaus?!”

He flickers out, too tired to deal with this shit.

~

“Do you want me to go?” He finally asks.

They’re sitting on Klaus’s bed, the one they used to share when the thunder got too loud. Or when the “training” got too rough, or just… when they needed each other.

“Do you want me to leave?”

Klaus is crying. His head is bowed as he shakes, knees pulled close to his chest. Why is he crying?

“No,” he sobs and shakes his head like a child.

Ben grins softly and reaches out a hand—

~

“I miss you so much.”

“I’m right here,” Ben says, like a broken record.

Klaus sighs tiredly and closes his eyes.

Ben eyes the little blue pills that rest in the palm of Klaus’s hand.

“We can still go, you know. Right now.”

“How?”

“We can grab one of the cars and just leave—”

“You know I can’t drive.”

“Stop making excuses! We’re old enough now! If you would just stop getting high for a second, you would realize that—”

He’s gone.  

~

It’s terrifying how easily everything slips away from him.

He thinks about Klaus all the time. Like he’s tethered to him, somehow. He doesn’t quite understand it. But it all comes back to Klaus. Just like when they were kids. He’s fixated and he hates it.

“You were going to leave me,” Klaus says harshly.

“I was?”

“It was so awful.” He squeezes his eyes shut as heavy tears trail down his cheeks. “It was awful, you were—you were—”

“What are you talking about?”

“You don’t remember,” Klaus laments sadly.

“Remember what?” Ben demands.

“You will,” Klaus says softly. “Sometimes, it takes a while. But you’ll remember. They always do.”

“Klaus, I—”  

~

“I stayed,” Ben realizes.

“You did.”

“I… I stayed for you.”

Klaus sniffs. “You kept talking about leaving. For so long… For that last year, it was all you could talk about, and I just…” He shakes his head and drops his gaze to his lap. “I should have taken you seriously. I should have listened. I should have—”

Ben blinks. What is Klaus saying?

“I keep thinking about how different things would be, if I had…” He shakes his head and shrugs. “Who knows, maybe… maybe you would still be here…”

Ben’s expression grows hard. “What the hell are you saying?”

“I think you know what I’m saying.”

~

He’s angry. He’s so fucking angry because goddamnit Klaus should have realized it sooner.    

His room looks abandoned. His belongings are gathering dust, untouched and uncared for. His books just sit there. His clothes hang. He supposes he never had much to begin with.

His whole life amounted to nothing. How fucking tragic.

~

There are things that he doesn’t see because Klaus is too high to keep him tethered to this world.

He never saw his own funeral. He never saw the way Allison and Vanya had cried for him. There was no body to bury, of course. Just an empty casket. Klaus had fallen away to a molotov cocktail of pills and coke. He collapsed during the reception.

No one really understood. No one tried to help him.

He was just a junkie who couldn’t even stay sober for his brother’s memorial.

~

And then he’s back.

“I miss you.”

“I know,” Ben says quietly. Because he finally gets it. It’s sad, hard to accept, even. But he gets it.

“I want to see it,” he says softly.

They’re back at the mansion and he follows Klaus’s footsteps like a dog following his master. “This place is so fucking depressing,” Ben says as they trek through the empty mansion. “It’s goddamn morbid. What the hell happened here?”

"You died," Klaus says simply.  “And we all fell apart. I knew you’d hate it.”

Ben reaches out, but his hand goes through Klaus’s shoulder.

Klaus freezes mid-step.

Maybe in another lifetime, things could have been different. Maybe they could have had another chance. A better life.

“I can’t—” Klaus chokes. “I’m sorry, I just can’t—”

“Klaus—”

~

“Stop getting fucked up. Just stop it!” Ben shouts at him. He’s furious, the anger rages through his bones, stronger than anything he’d felt in a long time. “You’re killing yourself, is that what you want? You want to fucking die?!”

“Fuck you!” Klaus screams. “Just fuck you! Fuck you for leaving! Fuck you for dying! Fuck you for leaving me alone, I can’t—I—” He chokes on his words and collapses into a ball, screaming loud enough to wake the dead.

Ben watches helplessly. He watches his brother fall apart. Unable to touch, unable to feel, because he’s a ghost wandering the mortal realm.

He can’t comfort the person he loves most.

He closes his eyes, and thinks of the ocean.  

~

“I’m a ghost, Klaus. Just another spirit haunting you, like…” Ben bites his tongue and looks away. “Like the ones who gave you nightmares when we were kids.”  

Just another monster to keep him up at night.

He flickers. He had so much to live for. There was so much he wanted to do. This isn’t fair. Nothing about this is fair. He had his whole life ahead of him! It’s not fucking fair—

Everything is quiet.

“I’m sorry I didn’t leave with you when you asked.” Klaus fidgets with his hands the way an addict does when he’s jonesing for his next fix. “Would you… would you believe that I’m sorry?”

Ben scoffs, suddenly furious again. “You only wanted me after I was gone.” He’s pissed off and it feels so good. “How could you possibly think that I would—”

Klaus closes his eyes and Ben's throat closes up like he’s being choked. If he still needed air in his lungs, he'd be in serious trouble.

He feels Klaus’s power. Feels it in every fiber of his being. Despite the way their siblings and Father think of Klaus as nothing but a joke, just an addict, a useless fuck up. But Ben knows better.

He’s not ready to let go. And it seems, for the first time in a long time, he and Klaus are on the same page. So he haunts Klaus’s every waking breath, every sober one, anyway.

He feels it when the drugs wear off, every single time, without fail.

The séance. Speaking to the dead.

Over time, it becomes laughable how little power Klaus has over his ability to visit.

Sometimes Ben fucking hates him.

He knows it’s not Klaus’s fault. It's not Klaus's fault that he died violently at a young age. But it’s easier to hate him than to simply accept his fate.

He’ll never feel again. He’ll never touch anything ever again. He hates seeing the mansion. He hates seeing his family, unable to speak or interact.

But the strangers that he sees as he follows Klaus’s life after he leaves home aren’t much better either.

“I hate it, seeing you like this. This… maudlin shit,” Ben mutters. “Get your act together, Klaus."

Klaus laughs. “Have you seen your statue?”

“Asshole,” Ben mutters. Of course he’d seen it. And he’d be grateful if he never had to lay eyes on that miserable thing ever again.

Talk about maudlin, oversentimental bullshit.

It’s fucking laughable. Maybe that’s why Klaus is cackling at him. Ben wants to punch him in the face.

He settles for rolling his eyes instead.

The irony is the worst.

May the darkness within you find peace in the light.

Who came up with this shit?

[reasonswhyimaginesmatter]

Why Oh Why (Scott Reed x Reader)

•6/16/18•

Summary: Scott Reed and Reader used to be the IT couple, but broke up. He moves on to a new girl fairly quickly.

I walked into school, greeting the few people I actually like. I saw Jessica, Clay, Alex, Justin, and Zach together., They’re the only people that are really there for me after my public breakup with Scott 3 weeks ago. I honestly don’t know how I could’ve coped without them here for me.

“Hey, guys,” I say walking up to them.

Justin was the first to speak up, “Hi Y/N, how are you feeling today? Are you okay?”

“Meh, I could be better. I’ll be alright though” I concluded.

They nodded understanding. I was with Scott for almost 2 years and he ended up breaking up with me out of nowhere.

“Hey Y/N, can we talk?” Scott stammered as he approached me.

I looked up at him worried, “Yeah, babe. What’s up?”

“You know I loved you. A lot. We can’t be together anymore, It’s not you. You’re amazing, but I don’t think we’re a good couple. We can still be friends though, however, us being together won’t work” he confessed sadly.

I felt my heart break in two as he told me this. I would’ve never thought that he would hurt me this way. Our relationship was nothing but happiness to me.

“You said you loved me. You said you would stay. Why are you doing this to me?” I started crying to him.

He looked at me sadly and scratched the back of his neck, “I’ll see you around, Y/N.”

Jessica snapped me out of my flashback by hugging me. I hugged her back feelings bummed all over again. I really love him more than anything and probably always will.

Alex looked at me, “I promise, you’ll be okay. He’s an asshole and really didn’t deserve anything you gave to him.”

I shrugged and looked over to my right. I felt my heart drop, Scott was with another girl. The worst part is that it’s Natalie, a girl I’ve been jealous of since 7th grade. This is embarrassing. Everyone already knew I was jealous of her, now my ex is dating her.

I threw my head back and groaned, “The bell’s about to ring. I gotta go.” I began walking away.

“Y/N! We have 7 minutes until the bell rings” someone called out to me.

I kept walking, wanting to get away from Scott and Natalie as soon as possible. I just walked into the bathroom to check and make sure my appearance was still in order and okay. I refuse to cry in school. I won’t give anyone the satisfaction to talk about Scott being over me, but me still reminiscing about him.

I hear the door open, “Y/N? Are you alright?”

It was Jessica. As much as I appreciate her being here for me, I really wanted to be alone at the moment.

“What?! I’m fine” I snapped looking back at her.

She looked really taken aback by my demeanor but still approached. I could feel her studying my face and my body language to figure out what she could say to make me feel better.

I felt tears welling up in my eyes, “Jess he’s gone. Please tell me, why would he leave? I was dumb to believe anything he ever said to me, he never loved me. I cried so much since he left me, I can’t even tell you how much… Why did he leave me?”

Jessica just brought me into a hug without saying anything. She just let me cry on her should.

“I loved him so much and tried so hard to let him know. Now he’s gone and with someone else. Please tell me what did I do wrong, Jess” I pulled back and looked at her with a tear-stained face.

She cupped my face in her hands, “He didn’t deserve you. You did nothing wrong, this was on him. You gave your virginity to him, went to all his games, took care of him when he was drunk and was there for him overall. This is not your fault in any shape or form. It’s his. He left you for someone else, not the other way around.”

I wish her words helped me. I really did. I felt nothing when she finished saying anything. I still feel like this is my fault in some way. He wouldn’t even tell me the reason why he decided he woke up one day and didn’t want me anymore.

“Thanks, Jess. I gotta go to class now.” I mumbled walking away from her.

I began my journey down the hall to my class. I avoid ever looking up in school just in case I see something I don’t want to. I checked my snapchat messages and collided with someone, sending me to the ground.

“Sorry,” I mumble looking down, “I guess I should pay attention more”

I look up, my heart skips a beat. It was him. The kid that broke my heart before anyone ever had the chance to.

“Scott” I whispered studying his face

He reached a hand out, “Hey, Y/N. Are you alright? I didn’t hurt you, did I?”

Physically? No. You just ripped my heart out and stomped on it like it was nothing. That pain was worse than any other physical pain.

“No, I’m fine. I was just pretty distracted, that’s all” I reply, grabbing his hand to which he pulled me up with.

I get goosebumps just by touching him. I really love this guy, I do. I couldn’t have gotten through anything without him being by my side.

“Can we talk?” I plead nervously.

He hesitated, “Y/N, I don’t think-”

“Please?” I cut him off before he could finish.

He shook his head at me, “Y/N, you need to get over me. I moved on and you should too. Now get to class, the bell is about to ring”

He looked at me one more time, before walking away. Leaving me in an empty hall, once again. I just want some type of reason why he left me. I never got one and it wasn’t fair, I didn’t even get a warning or a heads up.

I sigh and walked the rest of the distance to my history class. I took my seat next to Justin, my best friend. He has tried to help me through this, but he’s bad at it. Now, he just allows me to rant to him whenever I feel like expressing my feelings.

“You okay?” he asked looking at me worriedly.

I groaned. I’m so tired of that question, “Yes, Justin. I’m fucking fine. I wish everyone would quit asking me that. I’m going through a breakup. You’ve really been irritating me lately. I’ll be okay soon, but asking me the shit every 8 seconds is not helping. At all.”

“I’m sorry, Y/N. I’m just trying to help” He apologized, looking at me with hurt across his face.

I rubbed my hand over my face, “I know, I know. I’m sorry. This is just all so hard and I feel so lost right now. I didn’t mean to take it out on you, I’m sorry”

He looked away from me and to the board. He was still hurt, I could tell. I feel really bad for blowing up on him. Everyone is just trying their best, but I feel like a porcelain doll when I’m around them.

I sigh and pay attention to the lesson my teacher is giving me. It’s really been hard for me to concentrate on anything lately, and I feel unmotivated to do anything. I won’t even sit up and act like it’s Scott’s fault. It’s not. Sure, he contributed some way to this, but I always get like this around Winter and Spring.

Lunch rolls around and I go sit with Justin and the others. Justin is still mad at me, so I don’t sit next to him. I sit between Clay and Alex and instantly feel more comfortable around my friends.

“Where’s your food?” Clay asks looking down confused at my lack of food.

I shrug, “I’m not really hungry right now”

“You should still eat though, here Y/N” Alex insists on trying to give me a cookie.

This is what I mean by them treating me like I’m glass. I can’t even make my own choices anymore. I already had a big breakfast, so I really wasn’t hungry. Nevertheless, they still want to force feed me.

I glared at Alex, “I said I wasn’t hungry”

“And I said you would still eat” Alex snaps at me.

I scoff, “Quit treating me like a child, Alex”

“Maybe quit trying to make everyone feel bad for trying to cheer you up. You’re always a bitch, yeah, but this is not fair for us. We’re trying to help you get out of your heartbroken state, while you snap at every single thing we do” Justin barked at me from across the table, glaring at me.

I feel offended, so I get up and walk to where he’s sitting. He stands up too and glares down at me.

I look up at him, “You’re being an asshole”

“Maybe, but come on. Scott’s over you, he’s with Natalie. You’ve always been jealous of her and now I see what you do. You act like a slut sometimes Y/N. You always flirted with Natalie’s boyfriends. Even more priceless, you dated Scott even when you knew she liked him. It sucks that you fell in love with him on the way. He probably realized what a bitch you truly are” Justin insulted me harshly.

I feel my nose burning and tears well up in my eyes. Yeah, Justin and I get into a lot of arguments, but this was our worst one. He has never insulted me, and vice versa. He just called me a bitch and a slut. I felt hurt all over again.

I slap him. Hard. The whole cafeteria went silent. Everyone looked at us shocked. Even Scott, Natalie, and the rest of the baseball players. I began hitting his chest, crying out. He just stood there taking it. Clay finally ripped me off of him. He held me tight against him so I wouldn’t escape.

“Fuck you, Justin” I sobbed as I pushed Clay off and ran out of the cafeteria.

He said he loved me. He said he would stay, but now he’s gone.

[malecsecretsanta]

Merry Christmas, @forensicsisabelle!

Read on AO3

******

Your heart is bigger than our Christmas tree

“Magnus!” Alec shouted. “Where are the lollipops?”

“In your hand, darling? Magnus said slowly.

“No, I’m talking about the reindeer shaped lollipops.”

“Oh!, I saw them a minute ago. Wait.” Magnus’s eyes scanned the long table full with candies.

They were filling Christmas stockings with candies and little toys for the kids in the orphanage. “There” Magnus said when we found the bag with the lollipops.

“Thanks.”

The Christmas stockings were courtesy of Magnus’s magic. Alec smiled when he saw that Magnus had sent money to the store.

And though that was solved with magic the couple decided to fill the stockings with their hands. It was fun.

The large table had 64 Christmas stockings and Alec and Magnus already had filled 39. Alec had said to Magnus that he would finish the task while Magnus cook.

Magnus had the stove and oven full. He already baked Christmas tree shaped cookies and he was waiting for them to get cold. He also had his hands in the turkey and there was pasta and cooked ham with maple in the stove.

Alec had made the dessert the night before and it was already in the fridge. Magnus screamed when he saw his cooking timer didn’t sound and he hurried to open the oven. Alec went to the kitchen.

“Are you okay?”

Magnus checked all the food. Nothing was burned. Perfect cooking.

“Yes, everything is fine.” Magnus winked.

“Okay.” Alec didn’t ask and he disappeared and went to his work.

He had found his rhythm. He grabbed a stocking and walked around the table while grabbing the candies. At the end he chose a toy. Though he wasn’t a big fan of candies he felt like a little kid with all those bags full of candies. There were lollipops, chocolates, bubblegum, hard candies, skittles, mints, etc.

Magnus and Alec had went on candy shopping. They chose everything they liked and a thing or two more. They were both excited, it wasn’t the first time they did something like that but every time felt exciting.

Magnus used to donate money or cook for people in refugees. About two years ago he decided to make something different, to give to the kids a proper Christmas. Alec was more than happy to help.

He had smiled when his boyfriend had told him the idea. He felt so fortunate for having him in his life. He was a beautiful person.

Magnus took a break and went to see how was his boyfriend doing. He found him singing a Christmas carol in quiet voice. He smiled. What a sweet sight. Alec was doing his work with concentration so he didn’t notice Magnus until he felt his arms around his waist. Magnus’s head in his shoulder and Alec nuzzled his nose with Magnus’s cheek.

The warlock let his arms fell and Alec stopped his work not before he memorized the candy he was about to put in the stocking.

“Aren’t you a dedicated Christmas dwarf?”

Alec wrinkled his nose. “The little things that help Santa?”

“Yep. A hotter version.”

Alec’s cheeks became red but he smiled. “What about you, sparkly dwarf, how you’re your cooking?”

“Very well. We need to have a good cook in this couple, you know.” Magnus said, teasing.

“Ha-ha. Very funny. You can’t insult my abilities.”

“Okay, you’re right. Just your family’s cooking skills.”

“I can live with that. And just to prove my point..again, have a taste.” Alec grabbed a fork with pie, the slice he had been eating because he needed food while he was doing the Christmas stockings. Magnus ate from the fork and hummed.

“A man of many talents, like I said.”

“Well, we can’t all be a powerful warlock, some of us need to have many skills.”

“Hey! I could’ve summoned all the food but instead I’m making it.” Magnus made a false angry look.

Alec just smiled. “Don’t you have work to do?”

“Oh, and here I am making your day shine. Excuse me if I disturbed your labor.”

“You make my day shining even if you are in the kitchen.”

Alec thought he wasn’t good with words but Magnus didn’t complain, Alec walking with his heart in his sleeve was everything he could’ve ever asked for.

“But I did say that so you don’t feel scared of burning the food.”

“I know. And I love you have the teasing mood on.”

“You love me anyways.”

“I do.” Magnus searched for Alec’s hands and pulled him closer. The shorter man kissed Alec slowly. Alec let go Magnus’s hands so he could grab him by the waist. Magnus let his hands wander to Alec’s neck.

The kiss was almost lazy, because they didn’t have a worry in the world. Sure, they could be called for a demon emergency but in this moment they were fine, his friends and family were alright and they could get lost in happiness.

And that little piece of happiness ended with the sound of the cooking timer. Magnus huffed.

“We should call the timer ‘Jace’.”

“It’s a duck shaped timer, I think it suits him.”

Magnus gave him a last peck and went to the kitchen. Magnus set the recipients in the table. All the food was ready as well as the Christmas stockings. Alec put the lemon pie, the cheesecake, and the cake in the table too. That’s when Magnus’s magic appeared again. He multiplied the dishes, preserving the taste that just a homemade dish has.

The couple agreed to do the delivery in the mundane way. The mundanes in the orphanage needed to see them arriving in the cab. A cab full of food.

A woman with long hair opened the door, immediately she smiled and let the couple enter. There was a blonde woman singing while she swept. And a tall man was setting the tables.

They all stopped their activities and went to say hello to the couple. By that time they were well known for all the workers.

“The kids are in the yard.” Lou, the blonde woman said.

“Wonderful, because we have this Christmas stockings. We thought you could hide them and make them appear trough de night.” Magnus said, pointing at the two big black bags that Alec was carrying.

The man, named John helped Alec with a bag and both disappeared trough the last door. Another two women and a man appeared later, they went to the cab for the food.

When Alec and John came back, Lou said it was time to eat. Miranda, the lady who opened the door went to the yard and then all the kids were taking turns to hug Magnus and Alec.

When all the food was served, Miranda said the couple should give a speech. Magnus was the first and then Alec. They all said cheers with juice and ate.

After the meal, the kids began to play with the couple. Magnus pretended to be a thief while a group of kids chase him, and Alec was the guest of honor of a tea party. When Magnus had the time, he watched his boyfriend, he knew Alexander was going to be a great father, he just wished he could be as great as him. He was certain one day he and Alec will be parents, he didn’t know when but he knew it was going to happen and that thought made him more than happy. What Magnus didn’t know is that Alec had the same feeling, and though he and Magnus haven’t talked about having kids, the thought didn’t feel strange or scary. He knew some day it was going to happen and that day would bring even more joy to the couple.

The goodbyes were sad but there was also the knowledge that they were going to come back, so the kids gave them a kiss and said thanks. The workers said thanks too and then the couple leave the orphanage.

“It breaks my heart to see all of them alone.”

“I know, but they are not alone Magnus, they have Lou, Carol, John and the others, and they also have the other kids, and as Miranda said they have many adoption applications, they are just verifying that the couples are what the kids need. And as for the others, they are all incredible, sadly we can’t do anything but expect them to meet a great family but while that happens we are doing what we can, and that is bring joy to them.”

“My Alexander, you always know what to say. You are right, we can continue to do this. It really makes me happy. I just wish I could do more, you know.”

“Of course you do. You are always trying to fix the world. And that’s one of the reasons I love you.” Alec kissed Magnus’s nose. “You have a precious heart and with that you can keep bringing happiness to this place and others. And I always be by your side.”

“Of course you will, you have a big heart, Alexander. I knew it from the second I met you.” Magnus didn’t hide the tear that fell from his eye.

“My warlock, are we in a battle of size of hearts? Because if that’s so, your heart is bigger than our Christmas tree and that thing is huge.”

Magnus chuckled. “Not huge enough.”

“It’s almost 10 ft.” Alec said.

“We could have had a bigger tree.”

“But if you’d had a bigger heart you’d be an angel.”

“Shadowhunter, are you embracing your mundane part?” Magnus asked because in the Clave’s eyes an angel is a powerful being not the mundane version.

Even if Magnus was teasing him Alec knew Magnus understood what he had meant. And the warlock found himself falling in love with his warrior even more.

Alec intertwined his hand with Magnus’s.

“Come on, we will see the kids the next week but now we have a dinner to attend and your mother will be angry if we are late.” Magnus said.

“We won’t be late and she won’t be mad because you and your charming self are going to steal the night.”

“If you say so.”

“Yep. And I’m always right.”

Magnus rolled his eyes but smiled anyways, and began to walk. 

The evening was beautiful, he opened a portal and the couple walked through it.

[moonraccoon-exe]

(1) And here I am back again. Wanted to write to you sooner, but life dropped a huge pile of work on me and my mom got sick and I helped there and my brother got injured at work – a little piece of his finger was half off, but doctors say he'll be okay and he's already back home – and it was just a lot. But I am back. I totally understand the situation with that part of your family you talked about. I have something similar in my family. Everyone nice in their own way but totally stuck on old

ASLDKJALKDGJADKLGJDALKGJALGKADJGLAJGADLKGJDAKLGDJALKGADJLGKADJGLAKJGLAKJGLADKGJADLGJALKGJDALKGJDALKDALKGHADGKDAGJADKLFJADLKGJADKLGJADLKGJALKDJALSKFJAFAFASFASDASFADKGAGHADLKGJADLKGJADGKLA

PEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERIDOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*TACKLE-HUGS YOU*

MY SWEET PRECIOUS ADORABLE MUFFIN, YOU COOKIE MADE OF SWEETNESS AND WARMTH, BEAUTIFUL WONDERFUL HOOMAN, HELLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ( ´ ▽ ` ).｡ｏ♡

*KEEPS PETTING AND SNUGGLING U, U ADORBS PRECIOUS LITTLE MUFFIN*

OMG PERIDOT, HELLO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I’M SO HAPPY SO JOYED SO FLATTERED TO GET TO READ YOU AGAIN OMG I’M SO HAPPY TO BE REPLYING TO YOU!!!!!!! HEWWO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ( ´ ▽ ` )

Okay, I’m gonna add our good ol’ keep reading line here, buddy! :3

Don’t worry about not being able to reply sooner!! I did guess that you were either busy with something else, or that you needed time and you know both scenarios and any are alright. You’re not entitled to write to be with a strict schedule. I’ll be here to happily read you however long you need or want to take, aye, buddy?

ESpecially when it’s something as important as your mom and your brother!!! I’m sorry to hear that you had a sudden drop of a huge pile of work alksjdsakj that’s always startling and sort of stressing. And adding to that, your mommy getting sick and your brother having an accident. Gods above, it all suddenly piled up against you, dear Peridot!! I’m so sorry it all happened so suddenly and at once kalsjdlkgjda >

It’s also very important to acknowledge here all the hard work you gave, Peridot. Thank you for taking care of your mommy, and for worrying and helping about your brother, all while managing to get your work done. You’re quite an incredible, hard-working hooman, you know that? You managed everything. You’re absolutely incredible. I’m proud of you, buddy :3

I hope your mom is doing much better by now!! DO RECEIVE HALF OF MY MOST MAGICAL AND HAPPIEST RACCOONIE VIBES FOR HER WELL AND SOON RECOVERY!!!! The other half are, of course, for your brother!! ANOTHER HUGE LOAD OF MOST MAGICAL HAPPIEST RACCOONIE VIBES FOR WELL AND SOON RECOVERYYYYY!!!!!!!!!! (ﾉ´ヮ`)ﾉ*: ･ﾟ*: ･ﾟ*: ･ﾟ*: ･ﾟ*: ･ﾟ*: ･ﾟ*: ･ﾟ*: ･ﾟ*: ･ﾟ*: ･ﾟ*: ･ﾟ*: ･ﾟ*: ･ﾟ*: ･ﾟ

Zomg, what happened to your brother sounds like AAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!! D: But the doctors know their stuff, so let’s trust them! It’s such a relief and so good to know that he’ll be okay. All happy vibes to your family, dear Peridot!! :D

Sadly, I think a lot of today’s families have that sort of side of the family too. Those that aren’t…necessarily evil or bad, like some other parts of the family, but still not quite the sort of people one would like to hang with? Yep. It sucks to know that you too have a part of the family that behaves like that. Being stuck in old traditions is…hnngnhg…such a stRUGGLE, SUCH A HORRIBLE STRUGGLE AKSDJFKLGDJADLKGJDAGL

Especially when they come up with questions like the things they ask you. Like having a boyfriend (if you’re a girl, because those kind of people INSTANTLY assume every girl is straight by default lmao) is a MUST, like you’ll die the next morning if you don’t get one. Like. Lmao. Why do I want a walking piece of meat with fragile masculinity. And not like all men are like that omg NO XD but it’s so rare to find a man that isn’t like…that. JEEZ.

AND HELL YEAH, THE SWITCH IS SO MUCH FUN AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH! >3

HOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH PERIDOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! >3

Jesus, Peridot, you’re going to absolutely ROCK that party!! You’ll steal the spotlight aklsjdlkaj ahaha! WHAT A GORGEOUS OUTFIT ZOMG AND IT SOUNDS LIKE YOU LOVE IT AND THAT’S WHAT’S MOST IMPORTANT AAAAAHHHH!!!!!!!!! You’ll definitely feel incredible with the lipstick if you feel like you want to wear it with this!! GO, PERIDOT! BE FAAAAAAABULOOOOOOOOOOOOUS!!!!!!!!! >3

HELL YEAH, I CALLED YOU A FIRE WITCH!!! That’s because I know you love magic, and you once told me you were more into fire, sO A FIRE WITCH YOU ARE!!! °3° LOOKIE YOU MAKING ALL THAT AMAZING INCREDIBLE FIRE MAGIC IN YOUR PALM ALKSDJFGDLKJDALKGDAJALJG LOOKING BADASS AND BEING EPIC AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH, HELL YEAH FOR FIRE WITCHES AND FIRE WIZARDS AND FIRE YOU!!! /O/

GASPS

I’M HAPPY YOU LIKED MY BIRTHDAY MESSAGE AND THE CONFETTI AND THE CAKES!!!!!!!!!!! I WAS ABSOLUTELY HYPED TO KNOW IT HAD BEEN YOUR BIRTHDAY I WAS LIK EKLAJ SDKLDFJG LKAJ AL WOOOOOH!!!!!! I’M ABSOLUTELY HONORED, FLATTERED, AND INCREDIBLY JOYED TO BE YOUR FRIEND, TOO!!!!! *SQUEEZES U* ( ˙꒳​˙ )

I’M SO HYPED TOO TO KNOW THAT YOU AND YOUR BROTHER ARE GOING THROUGH AVATAR AGAIN AND THAT YOU’RE LOVING IT AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!! >3

Aaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh, it’s so cute and so good to know that Avatar is neutral ground to you two! Sibling relationships can be quite something, but I’ve always known from you that you have a good one with your brother. Still, that doesn’t mean you two agree on everything, which can be a little tense at times. But then something wonderful and beautiful like the art of animation and storytelling can bring you back together. It’s mesmerizing and mindblowing, isn’t it? How something that we’re so used to and consider “simple” like a TV cartoon is really art, and that it can have such a huge impact…wow… :3

And yes, Avatar is DEFINITELY the BEST show EVER!!!

HELL YEAH, I’M ALWAYS EXCITED WHEN ZUKO JOINS THE GAANG TOO!!!! And it always, ALWAYS, always always always without a fail makes me SO FRUSTRATED and upset and terribly sad when Zuko accidentally burns Toph. It’s GENIUS, way beyond GENIUS, but after watching Zuko struggle so much and be as courageous as to tell his dad to fuck off and choose his own path, after seeing all his suffering, we get to see how CLOSE he is to join the good guys and have a good life, aND BYE AN ACCIDENT- AKLSDJFDLGKAH JDALKFJ ALKGJAD GLKAJG DAKLG*FLIPS THE DESK* JESUS CHRIST!!!!!!!!!!!

And it’s her soles!! THE ONLY LITERAL THING SHE RELIES ON!!!! ASKJLDFGKADLGJALGJA GENIUS GODDAMN GENIUS BUT PAINFUL AND SAD AND FRUSTRATING.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO AND THE RECONCILIATION SCENE WITH UNCLE IROH!!!!!!!!!!!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THAT SCENE ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS WITHOUT FAIL BREAKS MY HEART, TAKES MY SOUL AND TEARS IT OPEN AND APART AND TOSSES MY FEELINGS INTO A TORNADO OF FEELS AND I CRY TOO, IT’S JUST- SUCH A POWERFUL SCENE I CRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

Uncle Iroh hits fragile heartstrings. Sure he can be the comedy relief, but he’s still got one of the saddest stories of the Avatar universe. We’re all ready to lose our parents one day, but we’re never mentally prepared to lose a son or daughter, and Iroh had to go through that? And then, when he projects all the love he couldn’t give to his son into Zuko, being mistreated by him, and when he’s finally starting to be loved, be BETRAYED and REJECTED by him?? WATCH ZUKO TAKE THE WRONG PATH AKLSDJ KLGDAJDALKGJADLKGJADLKGDJAGKLDAJGLKDAGJDALGK

AND WHAT GETS TO ME THE MOST, WHAT PIERCES THE DEEPEST IN MY HEARTSTRINGS IS HOW, EVEN DESPITE EVERYTHING AND HOW MUCH IROH HAS SUFFERED, WHEN ZUKO ASKS FORGIVENESS, HE’S STILL THE MOST SELFLESS CREATURE EVER, WHICH MAKES THE SCENE BEAUTIFUL BUT STILL SO HEARTBREAKING BECAUSE HOW DARE HE BE SO SELFLESS?!?!?!?!?!?!

You know with the whole, instantly hugging him and Zuko being like “I thought you’d be furious!” and Iroh is crying and tells him “I was never angry. I was sad, because I thought you’d lost the path.”

ASDKJLFAGDLDKFDGLHJGDLÑKFDAJGKDGADÑGAGJÑLFJADÑLKGHADÑLGJADFÑLKDAJGAÑDKLHDAJKLGJADÑLG

OH NO. I HURT MYSELF WRITING THAT I’M TEARING UP I’M MADE A DISASTER OF FEELS I’MGOING AKLJDFD GLAKHFJALKDGJDA

*CURLS UP AND CRIES FOR A GOOD WHILE BEFORE COMING BACK*

What I mean to say is AAAAAAAYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE, BUDDY, I TOTALLY UNDERSTAND YOU WITH THAT SCENE!!!!!! It’s so heartbreaking!! 

Definitely everyone should have an Iroh! People would be wiser, happier, and healthier. Iroh does good to the soul aahh :’)

HOH boy I’m definitely up to reading the LOTR books long and thick as they are!! The Song of Fire and Ice was my trial for that, if I could handle 5 books that size, I’m prepared now for Lord of the Rings!! But of course the Hobbit is going to be a MUST in the list, too! :D Even though I’m up to reading the original trilogy, do you still recommend reading the Hobbit first? It’s a prequel, after all, so maybe that could make the reading more rich? Or should I go with the original trilogy, THEN back to the prequel? HOH BOY I’m excited!! I’ve ALWAYS wanted to watch/read LOtR because it looks like it’s my absolute jam, it’s everthing I love!!!

I did hear/see somewhere that they’re making a movie about Mr. Tolkien!!! I’m absolutely HYPED about it, I can’t imagine how excited I’d be if I’d already read his books!!! Super curious to learn about the man with one of the biggest minds and brains for worldbuilding…IT GIVES ME CHILLS!! 

I once read, I think here on Tumblr, that the whole story of LotR started off as a bedtime story for one of his sons? And Mr. Tolkien was just coming up with random things and characters and plots, and this specific son was INCREDIBLY PICKY AND PETTY about the tiny details, like “but papa! You said the door was green the other day, and now you’re saying it’s red!” and Mr. Tolkien would stare at him, sigh, stand up, turn around and say something like ‘this picky brat’ and go make notes in his notebook to not forget those details XDSo that’s how one of Tolkien’s sons, by being UTTERLY PICKY, made one of the greatest masters of worldbuilding be so specific about his story LMAO AHAHAH

But I didn’t know that about him writing even in the trenches during battles!!!!!!!! :O WOOOOOOOOAAAAAAH, I DIDN’T EVEN KNOW HE HAD BEEN TO WAR!?!?!? WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!!!!!!!!!!!! THAT ADDS SO MUCH TO THE CONCEPT I KNEW OF MR. TOLKIEN!!! :O

Woaaah….I can’t imagine it…it must have been sort of a beautiful if tragic view; soldiers eating or smoking or walking in the terribly gross trenches, shooting, yelling, and amidst them, a man sat writing in a notebook. The sparkle of peace among disaster and chaos. Art among war. BRRRRR. CHIIIIIIIILLLLLLS, THIS GIVES ME CHILLS AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D

PERIDOT, I’M ABSOLUTELY, ENTIRELY THRILLED TO KNOW THAT YOU’RE ENJOYING THE FLAMEL BOOKS!!!!!! I wasn’t very sure if it’d be to your liking, becauase it’s been a good while of years since I read them, and it happened to me once that I read a book at like age 12, then re-read it at like age 16 because I remembered it was one of my ultimate faves, and I couldn’t make it past the first chapter without cringing and mentally vomiting LMAO HAHAHAH, so I was worried the books were just that good in my memory and not in reality. So I’m absolutely ecstatic to know you’re liking them!!!

SOPHIE AND JOSH ARE INNOCENT BABIES THAT I PROTECC!! You know, I think it WAS a good recommendation because of the twin thing. I can’t believe I TOTALLY forgot about that when I recommended it to you!!! We once talked about how awesome twins are, and how little there is of them in literature/etc, OF COURSE YOU’D LIKE THIS AS MUCH AS I DID SIMPLY FOR THE TWIN CONCEPT OH MY GOD HOW DID I FORGET KLAJSDLKAGDJDALKGJAD

HELL YEAH, your twin brother and you are as powerful too!!!! EPIC DUO, DYNAMIC PAIR, MAGICAL WIZARDS AYEEEEEEEEEEE

Nick and Perry are AWESOME too!!! I love their modern names, too. They’re very simple but that’s what makes it brilliant. It makes me wonder how many people from the past are wandering around today with modern names that can be so obvious, and yet we don’t catch…aaah!!! >3

PERRY TALKING WITH THAT POLITE GHOST GENTLEMAN ALKSJDFKLADGJADKLGAJGKLADGJ OMG I HAD FORGOTTEN ABOUT IT, I LOOOOOOOVE THAT BIT!!! I love the whole concept of Perenelle being able to see ghosts, and how she stumbled upon such a kind one. We normally think about ghosts are either scary or mentally unstable, so to read her conversation with such polite one was so comforting, especially in her situation. It felt like finding a friend in that unknown scary territory :’3

HELL YEAH, HEKATE LIVING INSIDE THE YGGDRASSIL, HOW BADASS IS THAT!??!?!!? AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH, first time I read it I didn’t know much about the Yggdrassil but when I looked it up I was like YO. BRO. THAT’S DOPE. THAT’S. THAT’S LITERALLY THE TREE OF FUCKING LIFE AND SHE’S- BRO SHE LIVES THERE. LIKE. BRO. 

She was a bit scary to me at first, and while she’s not my fave or most comforting character, I still ADORED the concept. The whole waking up a child, growing up by midday, ending the day as an old lady. JESUS CHRIST, WHAT A CHARACTER, I’M IN LOVE WITH HOW THIS AUTHOR HANDLED THE WHOLE MYTHOLOGICAL PART AKLSDJLDKGJAGLJ

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Peridot, I’m so, so, so, soooooooooooooooooooo happy that you’re enjoying the book!!! There’s still so much to see, and more characters, and I’m so excited for you to get the chance to dip into the world of those books, they’re SO GOOD and I’m thrilled and so happy that your birthday gift is to your liking!!!!  >3

Aaah...and...thank you so much for being as comprehensive and understanding about your asks as you are. I still feel so embarrassed and upset about losing a lot of asks in such stupid way. Even though you understand and you’re not upset, I’m still so sorry for losing them, not much for losing them, but because it means I never really answered. Thank you for still writing to me despite the couple asks I didn’t, and now can’t answer... ;n;

*hugs you*

Peridot, you’re really such a gift. Sometimes, you being so understanding and kind is a little beyond me, and so precious.Thank you for understanding and for not being upset at me. I would be at least disappointed, but maybe that’s me being harsh against myself aksdjfgajfklhajfalkjfa

Thank you, really. I don’t know how to say it enough. Thank you for understanding and for being so, so kind, dear Peridot... :’)

I do have something saved, though, and of course it’ll be my delight to answer them!! They’re old, but we can look at them as a TIME MACHINE ask hahaha :D Read what you told me a long time ago, re-read what I had answered so far, and continue replying as if it was recent. Hngnhng...I’m...still sorta embarrassed, but definitely happy to get the chance to still reply to that. Thank you, my dear friend... :’3

DEAR PERIDOT

You precious wonderful beautiful gem. My precious muffin. *pet pet pet* It’s always comforting and beautiful to write to you, you know? You feel like a cozy living room with a nice fireplace while outside it’s cold. Talking to you is always a joy, and sort of cathartic in a way. Thank you for taking the time to write to me, thank you for being so kind and understanding as always, and thank you for sharing with me your thoughts and experiences. It’s my honor and delight to write to my friend Peridot. Thank you, wholeheartedly.

ANYWAYS, PERIDOT!

I hope that you’re having a MOST FANTASTIC weekend, and may your week start off FANTASTICALLY AND PHENOMENALLY!!!! 

Sending you lots of hugs, my friend!! Have a WONDERFUL sunday!!!!!!!!! (ﾉ´ヮ`)ﾉ*: ･ﾟ

[saeran-choi-is-my-husband]

hello ~ can I please get a HC where the RFA, V, Saeran, and Vanderwood discover MC jamming to The Crush Song by Issa Twaimz. Have a lovely day~~~~

(Okay so it took me a bit to get used to the idea of this song and why someone would be jamming to it… so I listened to it on repeat while on dish duty during my cabin trip… and boy am I glad I was on dish duty alone after the fourth listen through ~ Admin Rowan)

Yoosung Kim

This boy had no idea what to expect.  He was taking a break between dungeon crawls when he heard music coming from the other room.  Last he had seen MC was studying in the living room, but the music didn’t sound like the usual stuff that they would study too.  When he peek in he saw them dancing with a song playing from their laptop.  At first he thought it was cute and was half tempted to record a bit of it to smile at later.  But as MC sang out loud he started to blush and look away.  It made him so happy to see how lively they could be, the way they moved their hips to the music and just seemed carefree as they sang along into the remote for the tv.  But as they sang about how hot they were he felt a blush spread across his cheeks, burning at the tips of his ears.

While he agreed that they were hot, he had to disagree about the single part.  He reminded himself that it was was just a song.  As it came to an end he shouted “and you’re my big fat crush!”  He slammed the door shut, and rushed back to his chair, his heart pounding.  Your laughter following him, keeping him smiling as he logged back in.

Jaehee Kang

While they lived together Jaehee did her best to keep her distance from MC.  Living together as roommates just made the most sense with them being business partners.  That’s what she told herself at least.  MC would always give her that coy, patient, smile of theirs and agree to anything along these lines.  Jaehee had been exhausted when she had gone to bed early.  However her body had been determined to only treat it as a nap, and woke up shortly after.  As she opened the door the first thing she noticed was the smell of freshly baked cookies.  MC was trying a new recipe, which made her smile and start towards the kitchen.  The next thing she noticed was the quieted music that MC must have been listening to.  

Jaehee was standing in the door way for a while as she watched the way MC bounced and danced in place, mumbling the word to the song.  Now it wasn’t Zen, but it was admittedly fun.  MC still had their back to her while stirring another batter of cookies with two different types already on a cooling rack behind them.  Jaehee started nodding their head in time to the song, which sadly ended not too soon after.  She was staring at the cookies waiting to hear what would be next when the song started up again.  Glancing up she caught the mischievous smile MC gave her while they hit replay.  Jaehee approached them, feeling a little sheepish.  

They tried one of the cookies while MC sang a little louder and danced a little more exaggerated this time, their smile growing with every giggle they got from Jaehee.

Hyun Ryu | Zen

He already knows the song, and his home isn’t that big that he couldn’t hear MC getting ready for the day listening to the song.  Zen had finished cleaning the dishes from making breakfast when it started up.  He snuck up to the bedroom door and tried to open it slowly so he could see what MC was doing.  It was adorable by all accounts in his book, she was wiggling more than dancing as she picked out what to wear for the day.  Mumbling the lyrics more than openly singing.  

Zen waited as he watched, he knew the song well and when the time was right he throw the door open, startling MC in the process while he started projecting his voice as he started in “hold up wait a minute-”.  Even though his girlfriend was now sitting on the door trying to keep from laughing he continued on finishing out the song by himself.  As the song ended he took a bow, enjoying the little applause MC gave him.  

Jumin Han

MC had lost track of the time, that was how Jumin explained her absence at the door to welcome him home.  It stung a little but perfect attendance was not something he was going to enforce, though he would tell MC his feelings on it when he found her.  

What he did not expect was MC dancing in their room singing with Elizabeth the third watching anxiously.  It was adorable in a way, the large arm movements, how her eyes were closed as if imagining being somewhere else, the cute cat headset he purchased for her.  So he relaxed and watch a little, even after Elizabeth the third came to him for attention when she deemed MC to be okay.  It was a moment before Jumin realized what the lyrics of the song were. 

“Excuse me, my lady.”  Jumin set Elizabeth down and carefully approached MC, as soon as the opportunity presented itself he grabbed her waist pulling her to him.  MC squeaked in surprise at being thrown off balance and at the kiss he pressed on her.  

MC removed the headphones, giggling a little, “sorry I got lost in the music, but what are you doing?”

“Just reminding you that you’re not single and that I love you.”  Jumin stated with a straight face, his eyes darting to the headphones, “strange song though.”

Luciel Choi | 707 | Saeyoung Choi

He had finally taken a break from all his work and had set out to find MC, however she was working.  As far as he could tell she was finishing up responding to emails for the RFA when suddenly she switched over to some music video.  As the music started playing MC took up and started stretching.  It was something she often reminded him to do, not to sit at the computer too long without taking some breaks.  However he had not expected what happened next.  It was only after a few seconds that he pulled out his phone and recorded MC dancing to the song, she was bouncing and the moves seemed to become more exagerated as it went on.  

As the song came to an end MC rolled her neck and shoulders, took a drink and sat down to continue working.  Unaware of Seven sneaking out of the room, a hand pressed to his mouth to keep from laughing.  He saved the video and whenever he was feeling particularly stressed he took a few minutes to watch the video. 

V | Jihyun Kim

“MC?”  He’d call out first hearing the music and he might have caught a flash of her dancing before she propelled herself at her phone to turn it off.  But not too much to get a good impression as to what had happened.  “Are you okay?”

“Oh yeah I’m good, how’re you doing?” 

“Good, so I was wondering if you wanted to go out for dinner tonight?”  And MC would agree though later on that night he would try to figure out what song it was and why it was so familiar.  

(sorry this one was so short)

Unknown | Saeran Choi(This interpretation might seem a little off, but it’s thought to happen after being in therapy for a while)

A few things. Firstly MC had no idea how long he was standing there, last she knew he had gone to take a nap.  His newest medication tends to make him drowsy.  Secondly Saeran had no idea why MC was turning red.  “Are you okay?”  

She would insist on being fine even with him coming over and checking her forehead for a fever.  “I didn’t mean to interrupt your dancing if that’s what’s wrong.”

“I wasn’t-!” MC would try to deny it while Saeran would go over and start the song over.  He would attempt to dance with her even though she would squirm and giggle trying to avoid dancing with him.  

“Is there something wrong?”  He would begin the song over from the beginning listening very intently, his eyes closed in concentration but still keeping the phone outside of MC’s reach as she tried to make it stop.  “I like the last part better if I’m honest, but it sounds fun.” Finally he would give it back with a yawn and a quick kiss on the cheek.  “Don’t be afraid to have fun, but we might need to talk to Saeyoung about getting you headphones if you’re going to listen to music while I nap.”

Vanderwood

This wasn’t the weirdest thing he’s seen.  Not by far.  Even though MC froze up and tried to pretend like she wasn’t dancing, Vanderwood barely even blinked at the moves.  In fact it was even weirder that she stopped in his book.  She had to remember, hes been dealing with agent 707 for a long time.  It often felt like the time with 707 actually took triple out of his life span. 

Even so, it was almost darling how modest she tried to be by pretending that she wasn’t just jamming out.  He was there to drop some updates off with 707 or Luciel or Saeyoung, and leave.  Though on his way out he couldn’t help the light chuckle as he saw the red tips of her ears and the horrified silence.  He turned around and caught her looking at him, feeling a little mischievous he mumbled “hush hush hush, blush blush blush, you are now my big fat crush.”  She turned a few shades of red as he called her out on the song.  Vanderwood, however, turned a few shades of red himself as he realized he just confessed and she had no idea.

Thank you for your patience, I hope you enjoyed it!

[bentenharuki]

Haikyuu Chapter 291, or How Furudate Is So Damn Predictable It Hurts...

As expected, this chapter is full of the usual thing you expect from a mangaka bound to please an army of brainless kids who like an inane “protagonist”.

As I predicted correctly (not difficult... Furudate does the things a 5 years old with TERRIBLE taste expects, so even a barely 20 years old like me feels like Einstein trying to guess his moves ya know...) we get bombed with the intuition of “bond comparisons” between the Twins and the Midget with my poor poor Lord. 

Furudate then licks even more the butts by putting Atsumu’s acknowledgement of Boku No Hero Karasuno in a form the simpletons who like The Orange Curse will think it means who knows what, while it does just mean he doesn’t consider him anymore a scrub (cit. Chapter 219, where he tells The Lord how he won’t let scrubs hit his tosses). 

Furudate does even better, trying to please the simpletons, drawing The Lord with a face THEY will interpret like my Precious One is being fazed by the proposal of Atsumu, while, giving his complete lack of further actions after it, it probably just means Kageyama thinks Atsumu has HORRIBLE taste in deciding who he would try to toss to  ;).

But let’s go in line.

I liked this chapter for the comedy provided by the twins (how I will miss them!) and for  beautiful Kita AND for the last page where Tsukki ONCE AGAIN takes my personal brain prize for telling it CLEARLY how the midget hasn’t really done much this game, being him just the one “witnessing the momentum OF OTHERS” and expecting for his (his “momentum”is what the whole game with Nekoma will portray, so I am expecting not much in term of satisfaction in it personally.)

We start with this, call it an introduction to doom? ;)

And we have to stand the “cheering and screaming” where Tsukki is a doll and my poor Lord gets harassed by Sugawara, who is not really dignified to touch that way The Lord, but my poor baby is way too tired to react (look at his face in the low cut... Kageyama is DESTROYED, he can’t even stand up or shrug anyone off...poor my baby who gave his 300% and shone so bright!):

The comedy (?) of Furudate starts pretty soon.

As I said Kageyama is dead but of course the midget has to break his balls no matter what.

Gosh, if I were The Lord I would terminate his life.

Why, WHY, WHYYYYYYYY he has to stand somebody so annoying and clueless?????

Lord Kageyama, next time kick over his ugly face better. He’s so FUGLY you could even help him in readjusting his mug.

Hinata REALLY makes me sick with his every fiber. I despise him 200%.

Anyway... Next, Furudate HAS to start to give Boku No Hero Karasuno his cookies. And what better way that destroying all decency and make Atsumu word his praise (?) in a way the simpletons will easily mistake?

I may recall to the brainless fans of The Orange Curse that what Atsumu says means SIMPLY he doesn’t consider that short one a scrub anymore (like he did at the start of the game). His way (as shown in chapter 219) to show Boku No Hero Karasuno consideration is simply telling him how he would set for him one day. 

It means IN GENERAL. It doesn’t mean at all he thinks Hinata will go who knows where, also because Atsumu himself after this debacle can’t guarantee for his own position in the top tier of National High School Volley anymore.

I know to try to put sense in the fans of the midget is a lost cause because they are not very... how to say? “ready”? But this is. Atsumu just says this way to Hinata he considers him good enough to try to spike his tosses which he wouldn’t allow scrubs to get.

Simply that.

Atsumu has clearly BAD taste, but you gotta understand the boy.

He got BURNED and SHOWED OFF by his kouhai he called “Goody Two Shoes” and sent home abruptly by him. OOOOPPPPSSS that had to hurt...

He can’t break in front of his competitor (especially being a prideful individual) even though he knows he’s no longer best young setter anymore. By losing the game, he has lost ALSO in the setter showdown.

But Ehy, Atsumu... you still a wonderful player!!!

Don’t be sad, you are a champion for sure :)

What Lord Kags wears as ???? face at Miya’s “invitation” to the midget ISN’T anything like territorial pissing or the likes... 

I think the Lord is just thinking that Atsumu simply has no idea how painful to be with Hinata is. He’s looking at him like “Really Miya san? Do You want to set for him? Good luck... gimme your brother in exchange and have fun?”

Talking about Osamu...

In the next panel Osamu is MAGNIFICENT.

His words to Atsumu’s baseless and useless “declaration” is AWESOME.

I will miss so much the twins... these panels with them are fantastic, they REALLY are amazingly believable characters.

ps: Atsumu... as former best setter, take freely Boku No Hero Karasuno.

Kags will be happy to look forward playing with his REAL peers he has already met a the Camp.

You know... the best setter has to play with the BEST SPIKER and THE BEST Libero sometime soon. And since THE Best blocker (beside Kags himself) also stays in Karasuno, has blonde hair and has JUST to finally fully blossom, you can take Hinata. He DOESN’T BELONG to what the Lord deserves anyway ;)

Enjoy the annoyance, if it pleases you and be ASSURED the Lord won’t ever regret losing him, neither would any of the people reading Haikyuu for the actual PLEASURE of volleyball, which Hinata is completely foreign about.

What was very cute beside some more comedy courtesy of Jester Atsumu (he is SO childlike and cute... really I will miss him painfully... he is so extra you can’t dislike him... he acts in everything as a teenager, and he makes me laugh a lot...), and his twin calling him MORON which once more takes the cake (OSAMU!!!! YOU are adorable too!!!) and which you can see here:

What was cute... is the way Kita demonstrates once more he was a real good captain.

I like the fact his convictions weren’t broken by a single game. I like how his vision about what volley is (even if I don’t fully agree with them) STAYS the same no matter the defeat.

Kita is another great character whom I will dearly miss.

I just find bad how Furudate HAS to put in Kita’s mouth what I was SURE would have come, namely the “comparison” between the twins and the Karasuno’s pair.

I knew predictably Furudate would have done this, I just hoped he would have gotten the decency of not using beautiful baby Kita for it.

But it’s Furudate we’re talking about.

Of course he would do the worst, when willing to glorify the senseless protagonist he has chosen to have:

Still, to have the twins doing those guilty faces and wondering at the same time what “in the zone” means, is so funny I got to include it all in the roll, no matter if it irks me to read about a comparison WHICH DOESN’T EXIST.

The twins have a TWIN BOND.

Unbreakable, genetical, deep, beyond borders.

My poor Unfortunate Lord has to carry the burden of having to cooperate with a midget who doesn’t deserve ANYTHING he does, did or will do with him, and he has to stand this pain ONLY for the sake of the team.

There is NO bond, no bond at all between Lord Kags and the Orange Scrub.

They cordially HATE each other and I really hope sometime in the next game Hinata will realize he will be better off with people different than the Lord.

Kenma... whoever... TAKE HINATA AND FREE MY LORD.

Okay... to gain back my good mood, have all this blessing image of sweet angel Kita looking like Lord Kags fair colored and smiling twin *.*

Awwwww he is SO cute, so loveable... So strong and strict, but also so sweet.

Aran’s reaction is ME looking at this panel *.*

And in front of this FINALLY even Atsumu says something worthy in this chapter, FINALLY, something we can ALL agree with and something which makes me hope also Osamu will try harder from now on on court and with volley, so he can match his brother targets (Osamu’s stats are actually BETTER than Atsumu’s ones - Furudate has decided it, look at them in the official site in japanese -, so he is meant to be the better player between the two ;)):

Inarizaki... you have been the best team I have seen in this manga.

If Itachiyama is supposed to be WAY better than even you... I can’t wait to see what Itachiyama is (I know that before it we will have Nekoma, where I only am interested in Lev as a surprise, and pretty surely Hoshiumi’s Kamomedai... but I long from now on ONLY to see Sakusa and Komori loom over my perfect Lord Kags).

Last stuffs... THESE:

As I wrote before, THANK YOU TSUKKI once again for pleasing me and my hate of the Orange Curse.

I LOVE how it is clear what you say means Hinata hasn’t truly done much this game (because he hasn’t: only the retarded fans of such a shame of a player can get all awwww about the fact he received TWICE in his volleyball career in this game, and attempted a final block - helped massively in making it successful by the Lord - you know...being a MIDDLE FRICKING BLOCKER!!!!) and this makes me happy.

Sadly the fact Furudate is the most predictable writer in the Universe when it comes to boku No hero Karasuno, this only means that the full of Nekoma game will be an ode to Hinata’s “moment” which will finally come, in time to let him face Hoshiumi in the following one.

Well, for me it will be easy...

The more the incoming chapters will see the absurdities about Hinata, the less I will care about Haikyuu, until Sakusa and Komori come to let my Lord Kags face his peers, finally.

See ya world... in a FROZEN MILAN, we are about to go out dancing tonight, so I queued this post which shall show off tomorrow morning at some time ;)

Happy weekend?

happy weekend ;)