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#what did i miss…T_T
flovverworks · 9 months
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five yrs in forgotten valley would help akira tremendously
#stardust speaking !#'with what' i dont know#the farming game love is simply intense rn my heart aches for pixels forming trees and cows and turnips#also cuz mollys scene where she returned from a wedding of a former 'coworker' T_T not feeling like she belonged in the city#them more or less laughing at her when she spoke about her current job#oh my no1 love.....#matthew who feels like he isnt getting better & is frustrated about it#that nami scene where she admits she did intend to leave but she got hungry and wanted lou's cooking so she forgot about that & went back#premhyk akira is very.....lost to me T_T very kind and gentle but very. going along w the flow?#thinks of those lines about how they now can look at ppl at vincent & gilbert properly#while in the past they wouldve looked away & avoided them#also the line i always mention but akira taking comfort in the convo about burnt bread and jam and olive oil#lumina who plays perfectly but thats the issue because she just plays the notes. she isnt plyng like shes having fun#lumina who felt like she should become like her mother but also knows thats not what romana wants at all#luminas line about how practice feels like watching paint dry LMAAOOO I ADOREEEE her shes so. silly. so great#idk if ive ever said it here but forgetmenot valley has always been my favorite town. probably nostalgia factor but#i plyd hmds a tremendous amount LOL said i wouldnt marry muffy since i Always went for her in awl#so i went thro flora lumina nami.....rly like flora still i think shes cute#i miss leia too#also i read some of the engagement scenes and i rlyyyy like matthews and namis................(i like celias 9heart event a lot too LOL#i think shes cute#i should watch them too but i dont wanna yet ill do it some other time#also the gordy scene where he visits ur farm GOD the mc is SO cute T_T?!?!? the way they play w their dog ?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!#thinking about flowerworks too......although i might be flawed but arent we all......#every step you took toughened the world....#god i Have been thinking about flowerworks lately but i havent listened cuz just thinking about the lyrics makes me tear up LOLT_T#akira and their wizards......1.5..........
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mbrine · 6 months
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I have hacked the mainframe (Inspect Element)
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It seems like WOW starts at 4000 boops given, OMG at 2000, MAX at 1000
Adding on all the tiers I've found so far
MAX - 1000
LOL - 1500?(Missed the window, can't confirm)
OMG - 2000
WOW - 4000
*-* - 5000
WHY - 6000
PLZ - 7000
AAA - 7500
;_; - 8000
0_0 - 8500
T_T - 9000
MAX - 9200+? (I think the counter bugged? idk)
<33 - 9500
TUM - 10000 given
BLR - 10000 received
How to Super Boop
On desktop, hover your mouse over the Boop button for around 5 seconds, and it will do 2 spins.
Once the button is done spinning, click on it and you can send a Super Boop!
EVIL BOOPS can be accessed by allowing the animation to play 3 times before clicking
One way to get Super Boops on mobile is using a web browser to access tumblr. Use "Desktop Site"/"Desktop Mode", then click and hold the button to send the boop. That'll convert it to a Super Boop button. It seems pretty inconsistent though.
For all clicking enthusiasts, do click this too, trust me, it's just as satisfying
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Omg thanks everyone for the boops, I've been butterfly clicking the boop button for so many different people for the past 6 hours and I'm exhausted
I'm pretty sure this is also my most engaged post on any platform I've ever used, thanks for all the RBs and likes <3 <3 <3
If anyone's crazy enough to try reaching 10k without an autoclicker, here's what I did
Ok, one more tutorial for the boops before I go to bed for real.
How do I check my exact given and received boop count?
NOTE: You'll need to refresh the page to update the counters, unless there's another method to check the live count
Chrome
Go to your dash ("home" tab).
Press f12, or right click and select "Inspect Element"
In the window that pops up, click on "Sources" then "dashboard" under "www.tumblr.com" (Pic below for reference)
In the window showing the code, press Ctrl+F and type in either "givenCount" or "receivedCount".
Ta da! (Pic below for reference)
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Firefox
Go to your dash ("home" tab).
Press f12, or right click and select "Inspect Element (Q)"
In the window that pops up, click on "Debugger", then "Sources" and "dashboard" under "www.tumblr.com" (Pic below for reference)
In the window showing the code, press Ctrl+F and type in either "givenCount" or "receivedCount".
Enjoy formatting (Pic below for reference)
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Gonna take a break from Tumblr for now, my fingers are in shambles and I'm pretty sure I can hear the mouse clicks echoing around inside my skull. Thanks to everyone for making this random Singaporean guy's day, mbrine signing out! ❤
Here's a link to my Twitch and Instagram for those who're interested, seeing as the standard procedure for when a post blows up online is to shamelessly plug lol ;)
Happy April Fool's Day!
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Things about the Wisdom Saga that have plagued me all damn day
Legendary
Whether intentional or not, Miguel's Telemachus really sounds like a younger version of Jorge's Odysseus. And that hurts.
"If I fight those monsters, is it you I'll find?" The layers. Could he go out and hunt for his father? Could he find his 'legendary' strength within himself? Or will Odysseus be the 'monster' he finds?
"Somebody help me, come and give me the strength" And his call is answered T_T
20 years.
Antinous fully interrupts this bop. Rude.
Ayron sounds legitimately scary and Telemachus taking a stand is so O.O
Little Wolf
I wanna fight this guy. Love that Athena agrees. (The beat of the song and sharp bursts of vocals really emulate blows.)
The quaver on "I don't know how".
Athena is immediately charmed by Telemachus' enthusiasm. She sounds so fond.
The fact she sees heart in him as an advantage when it was Odysseus choosing heart over mind that drove them apart. Guh.
Did she tell him to bite Antinous? XD
"Oh, maybe I pushed you a bit too hard." The change in her perspective is already so apparent - she wouldn't have admitted a mistake or miscalculation to Odysseus.
We'll Be Fine
"I had a friend before..." A FRIEND? FRIEND?!?!
An admission that she didn't fully appreciate what Odysseus was going through, that she feels guilty for having "missed it all".
It's unclear to begin with if she's come to Telemachus for Odysseus, or to try and replace him. Both are equally heart-breaking.
"I don't know who your friend is, I don't know what he's like" UNKNOWINGLY ECHOING HIS OWN THOUGHTS IN 'LEGENDARY'. NO IT'S FINE I'M FINE.
"The best day of my life because I got in a fight and I didn't die! :D" Telemachus, child, please.
"We'll be fine" using the same run as "this is my goodbye" T_T
Him immediately offering up friendship to Athena, like Odysseus once did, must hit her so hard. "You're a good kid." Yes he is - because he's more like his dad than he knows.
Love in Paradise
"Old friend..." FRRRRRIIIIEEEENNNNNDDDDD!!!!!
10 years.
The memory fragments sounding so fraught and chaotic together, hitting harder because they're hitting Athena all at once. She missed a lot.
"She's my wife." "Anyways..." Calypso, girl, please.
Love that they're singing completely different melodies through the first half of this song for two reasons: because Odysseus is revisiting previous motifs, once more trying to hold onto the man he was, and also because it shows Calypso is not willing to compromise on what she wants.
"Last I checked goddesses can't die." We'll come back to this later.
Then Odysseus realises he is truly trapped and he sings along to Calypso's melody in muted horror.
POLITIES OUT HERE STILL HAUNTING THE NARRATIVE.
Just the words "open arms" are enough to confront Odysseus (again) with all he's lost. All he hears are screams.
And the one he screams out for is Athena.
"He needs my help." NO KIDDING GO GET YOUR BOY.
God Games
"Father, God, King..." There's a lot to unpack in that fun family dynamic.
"To untie apprehensions that were placed on that Greek?" Zeus is like, nobody likes that guy, why do you care?
The gods being called out like X Factor finalists is everything.
So there's a great contrast against the previous song - unlike Calypso, Athena is matching each of her singing partners with their tone and beat as she convinces them. She isn't winning by 'imposing her will', she's meeting them where they are.
Rational arguments work until Aphrodite, where Athena says "please" for the first time. She softens to appeal to Aphrodite, which is why Ares has to step in.
The way she says his name XD
Ares' lines sound like as much of a fighting chant as 'Little Wolf' did, which makes it all the better that the mention of Telemachus is what gets her to 'fight back'.
"His son's my friend!" YES HE IS. And Athena of all people declaring "a broken heart can mend" is fascinating. Can't help but wonder if she's talking about herself coming around to forgiving Odysseus.
"Never once has he cheated on his wife." Handwaving the source material is worth it for this line ALONE.
Zeus is so pressed by everyone openly knowing he cheats on Hera. Stop doing it then my dude.
Ares sounding genuinely concerned for Athena is doing things to me. Goddesses can't die, huh?
Her time motif flitting in and out like a weak heartbeat.
The soft piano of 'Warrior of the Mind', touching on a whisper of 'Legendary', then rising to a triumphant crescendo as Athena regains herself. I will be forever haunted by visions of Odysseus and Telemachus helping her to her feet.
And then, finally, she faces her own father and begs. Because Odysseus and Telemachus deserve a chance to be father and child.
The parallel, by the way, of Athena entering this saga to help an outnumbered Telemachus, and now closing it with him/Odysseus unknowingly helping her win her own battle too. JORGE HOW DARE YOU T_T
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syefiles · 2 months
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𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: sylus : midnight stealth, but what should've happened. 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠: really sadistic sylus. not accurate scene (rewritten some parts) fingering, the reader is seen as a female and has a pussy, dom! sylus, kissing. lmk if i missed anything. 𝐚/𝐧: requests/suggestions open in my ask-box [] hiyaa ! i missed writing on here. lately sylus has had me in a choke hold T_T here's me coping with my obsession with a new fic. thank you, and enjoy :)
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You were home alone with the bird twins, Sylus' most important and capable helpers whose posts are his house. You were almost going to shake your head to get more ideas on how to invade the vampire and get the brooch.
It wasn't fair. A ruler of a nation against a pitiful hunter who just happened to waltz straight into his own personal hell. "Stop worrying your pretty little head. Boss might be scary and sophisticated, but if you play your cards right, you can achieve your goal." Luke spoke from the dinner table, while Kieran was sat on it. "But then again, you only have an hour left in your deal. Make it count."
You sat up from the couch, finally picking yourself up with enough confidence to face the final boss. Luke and Kieran put up two signs, one with tiger claws and another with a peace sign. "Good luck, you stray." Kieran remarks.
The moon was beautiful. Although the sun never shined in this dimension, it was still a sight for sore eyes. You approach the heavy door decorated with expensive vintage handles, that might cost a few thousand back at home.
You tightly grip the evol-sealing handcuffs and a tranquilizer gun, giving yourself a few imaginary pats on the back. You open the door, seeing the smoke-headed crow resting on his headboard, as vulnerable as a dove. His breathing was steady, hands remained warm atop his covers. He could've just asked me to tuck him in.
You approach his figure quietly, as if cautious of a landmine on the wooden floors. Your leg climbs on his mattress, sitting down gently. Your mouth whispers his name, "Sylus, Sylus?" When you saw his chest still remained steady, you successfully cuffed his heavy hand on his headboard.
"This is what you get for toying with me." You muttered under your breath and the same volume you did when you whispered his name. You set the gun down, while you inspect his red and black robe, He must have hidden it here.
Your hands barely touched the fabric, his free hand successfully trapping your wrist. His eyes furrow, failing to recognize your features at first. You stare at his face in shock, like a cat trapped in a glass box.
"Showing up uninvited at this hour, want me to tell you a bedtime story?" He asks, clearly sarcastic and angry. Your shocked expression drops, "Actually..." Your two hands cage him in, closing the space between you. You could see his face so distinctly from here.
"You should be able to figure out what's going on here." His eyes stare at you, almost burning holes into yours. "These handcuffs have you helpless. No matter how powerful you are, you can't do anything for an hour." You taunt, successfully catching your hunt.
"Really? What do you intend to do now that I've become your prey?" He asks, intrigued. Your right hand detaches from the plush of his headboard, putting out your hand. "Where's the brooch?"
He smirks, "Help yourself." fully offering his semi-naked body to you. While patting down his sides and pockets, you list all of the things he had done to you once you stepped foot into the N109 Zone. "No ordinary person would do that. So..." Your hands stopped their advancements, completely staring at him now, he stares back.
"Don't tell me you're doing all of this because you like me."
Sylus laughs at your misunderstanding. He did all of this for his own benefit, he only desired to resonate with you and nothing else. Yet, fate chose the hard path for you two. "Clearly, you read too many fairy tales." You ignored his words and resumed back to searching.
Your hands search under the collar of his robe, "Does my answer really matter to you?" He asked. "That doesn't matter now. I won!" You exclaim, using your thumb to flip the coin up into the air, and catching it with your hand.
Sylus let a few moments of silence pass, trying to savor what little feeling of triumph you have left. "Don't tell me..." Your expression changes into a frown, "I won't go back on what I promised you." Sylus sits up, his back no longer leaning on the bed. "This was quite the thrilling experience for you huh, sweetie?" His evol submerged the metal of the handcuffs, causing it to deteriorate.
Your eyes widen, and you quickly try to get up from the bed, but he flips you over by your thighs, completely laid down. You try to retaliate with your hand, but he catches it almost immediately with his. "You're pretty good at running away."
He takes the gun by your side and inspects it himself. "You were gonna use this on me?" He almost laughs, staring at your shocked and vulnerable expression. "Yes, just like that." He says, aligning the gun on your cheek, running it down and up your soft skin. "You're so beautiful when your face contorts in fear, kitty."
He lets out a low laugh. "And disobedient kittens get punished," He lightly slaps the gun on your cheek. He traces it down to your chin, lifting it up to level his eyes with yours. "I-I won fair and square!" You respond, only receiving a heavier slap with the gun on your cheek.
"Bad girls don't talk back." His left eye glows but quickly settles down once your hands reach into his robe, feeling his hard abs and warm skin. Sylus raises an eyebrow, curious at your moves. You slip one side of his robe off, exposing his neck. You grab onto his shoulders, licking and nipping at his neck.
He lets out a groan, while a hand slips up from your inner thighs and into your panties. They're soaked, he thought. A finger hooks on your panties, sliding them to the side, his middle and ring fingers toying with your clit, rubbing circular motions on it. Your tongue slows down, letting out exasperated moans here and there. "Sylus-"
His hand slaps your clit, making you jolt in response. "Try that again, sweetheart." He stops his fingers from moving, waiting for your reply. "Sir..." You mutter, two fingers entering you. Your arms shake on his shoulders from his lengthy fingers bullying themselves into your sopping cunny.
"Good-fucking-girl." Each word came with a curl and a thrust from his fingers, making you go ballistic. He was nimble and skilled with his hand, while two were inside, his thumb was working magic on your puffy clit. Your mouth didn't stop leaving love bites all over his neck, while he kisses all over your boobs and collarbones.
"Such a pretty face." He says, admiring your sweat and small tears collecting at your waterline. You let out small moans and whimpers from the pace his fingers were jolting in and out inside of you. "Gonna cum for me?"
He asks, your cunt pulsates around his fingers and they grow tighter each curl at your g-spot. "Mmhm-mhp!" Your hand covers your mouth, cautious of all of the noise you're making. Sylus' head lowers, "Come on, be loud for me, darling." he whispers in your ear, his hot breath tickling the shell of your ear, that action alone was enough to send you over the edge.
"S-Sir, 'm cumming- oh fuck!" You exclaim, finally letting go of your hand on your mouth, Sylus quickly kisses you while you make a mess of his fingers. He didn't slow down, letting you ride out your orgasm.
He pulls away, a string of saliva connecting you two. You lay there, disheveled. "Look so pretty f'me, hm?" He grabs a towel from beside the bed and wipes off the residue and your essence. Your eyes close, you were too tired to even process anything at this point.
Sylus sets down the towel and grabs the blanket, wrapping you two in it, spooning you from behind. "B-but Sylus, what about you?" He smirks, grateful you asked him that question.
"You can pay me back at the banquet tomorrow."
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©syefiles 7/19/2024 - do not copy, translate, modify my works.
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cospinol · 2 years
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Genuinely can’t get over warau arsnotoria having the most premium Big Group of ikemen characters I’ve seen in ages, airing in this incredible dry spell Era we’ve been in lately where it’s just been season after season of ikemen shows with designs so bad/boring they can’t hold my interest at all, and then the group of characters is just… not in the show lol. The incredible nerve of it. No I will not be downloading your gatcha game to learn more thank you very much
it’s like an intentional version of the self-own bucchigire also performed this season where one character was so much better than the rest of the cast that he accidentally tanked the entire show. But at least that wasn’t on purpose
#kind of have to respect arsnotoria for doing this On Purpose even though it actually sucked to watch in practice#the girls side slice of life really did work in its own right but why would you intentionally make me not pay any attn to it T_T#txt#also I still haven’t finished bucchigire so I guess that show could have an incredible comeback of some flavour#hard to see it happening though when it seems so deeply committed to its style of character drama that Largely works but#always seems to just miss the mark by a few inches for me. idk I think that’s it’s literally just#hard for me to care abt anything else when todou-kun’s absurd melodrama is sitting right there at all times and no one around him cares!!!#which is in and of itself kind of the best part of the show & I love the aspect of the rest of the group being Paired Off w each other#as a metric of Leaving Him Out Narratively and like.. if it was on purpose this would be anime of the season#like he is so cute there’s nothing I want to see more than him being generally mistreated#if I could believe the writing was leaving him out On Purpose it would be an excellent meal#but as is i have no idea what it’s going for at all .. smth boring in the evil otouto plot I guess. we’ll see#actually nvm I would probably hate it if it was doing the Neglect dynamic on purpose#since I despised that in bokuhaka (posterchild show for shooting yourself in the foot with One Good Character)#but in my mind it’s good..#WAIT AND ALSO SINCE I’M HERE I have a petty axe to grind abt katsura being disappointing. obviously.#I’m not a shinsengumi girl in general and usually watch bakumatsu era shows for the joui characters#and obviously he was the one I was most excited to see here and his design is adorable but like ToT what the hell is that lol#lamest romance I’ve seen in anime in a hot minute and it’s where ALL his screentime goes & totally subsumes all of akira’s other development#would call it an unforced error but it’s clearly the main thing that both of these characters were conceived specifically in service of#so them both appearing interesting/appealing before it kicked off was actually the accident. I guess. yeesh
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dumpywrites · 5 months
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Cat-enaries - Min Yoongi / Suga
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Part two of Cat-astrophe 
Summary: all these series of meaningful acts, but you still don’t know where your relationship stands. 
Genre/tags: Fluff, smut (protected sex, vanilla)
Pairing: Yoongi x she/her/afab reader
a/n: this is my first time writing smut! T_T
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Ever since that eventful night you spent at Yoongi’s place, where both of you got drunk and eventually ended up sleeping on the same bed together (just sleeping!), and him wanting to get to know you more, you continued to see each other more and more. Mostly after you came back home from work, but it could be on weekends too if both of you did not have any other plans. 
After a while you began to know some of Yoongi’s friends, and same thing for him as well. He had a small circle but you were surprised on how they bring out the best out of him. He had been doing all these small gestures just like randomly giving you snacks, offering to babysit your cat when you were busy, or just simply wanting your company while he was producing music. Occasionally he would invite you to a party from his management, where you met his co-workers. 
He would only introduce you by your name though, never any label following behind the introduction. A friend? A neighbor? No, just your name. All these things he had done, and never once did he ever mention about relationship, or at least to put a name on your situation. 
It had only been three, going on four months, you kept telling yourself. Maybe he wanted to get to know you slowly and throughly and did not want to rush things. But then again, you knew how straightforward Yoongi was and he would had at least said something about it if that was the case. Maybe it was for the best, reminding yourself of the traumas you got from your past relationships, maybe it was better to take things slowly. But what made you anxious was the thought of falling by yourself.
Tonight you both agreed to watch a horror movie together at your apartment, with the occasion being you just got a promotion. The promotion happened two weeks prior, but both of you were busy. Yoongi had already sent you a dozen of donuts as a celebratory gift, but you insisted on wanting to spend some quality time with him.
“Have you eaten?” You asked as you opened your apartment door for Yoongi. 
“I have.” He simply said and immediately bent down to greet your pet who was meowing by his feet. 
“He misses you.” 
“We see each other a lot, don’t be a clingy cat.” He smiled and booped the cat’s tiny nose. He picked Cookie up and lightly kissed his forehead before letting him back to roam around the house. 
The scene made your heart race and you cleared your throat. “Well, I also miss you.” You said, hoping Yoongi would catch your intention. 
“I miss you too.” He giggled and ruffled your hair instead, before walking to sit down on your sofa, completely unaware by how disappointed you were. “We’re watching Exhuma, right?” He asked. 
You hummed in agreement, hoping he wouldn’t catch the slight disappointment in the tone of your voice. “You wanna drink something?”
“Anything’s fine.” 
You muttered an “okay” before going to your fridge and grabbed two cans of Sprite and small bowl of popcorn you had made beforehand. You sit down next to him and played the movie and thought to yourself. There wasn’t really anything affectionate happening after you spent the night at his. You had never really kissed officially with you being sober, maybe only once when he kissed your forehead when you went to roller skate together, that was if that could even be counted. 
That day you were struggling to keep your balance and he caught you in his embrace just when you were about to fall frontward. He was laughing and despite being annoyed, you couldn’t help but to get swayed by the sound of his laughter. You didn’t get to process it that much when you felt his lips lightly pressed against your forehead. It happened just for a few second before he let go and simply asked if you were okay. 
Reminiscing the moment had your whole body warm. You put your feet up and hugged your knees together. Yoongi looked to your side, noticing your behavior. 
“Are you cold?” 
“Uh, I don’t know.” It was the opposite, you dummy! You secretly complained. 
“Here,” He grabbed you by your shoulder and scooted you closer to him. “Better?”
“Slightly.” You said, you didn’t realize you were pouting while saying it. 
Yoongi sighed, but a small smile was on his lips. “Only slightly?” 
“Only slightly.” You were annoyed by this point, but you felt awful for wanting to ask, and basically begging, for any skinship from him. 
“Hey, what’s wrong?” He softly asked while stroking your shoulder gently. 
“Do you not like me like that?” You said while avoiding his gaze. “Am I reading the whole situation wrong? Do you just wanna be friends?”
Yoongi chuckled and it annoyed you further more. He had the audacity to find this hilarious while you felt confused and hurt. 
“Yoongi, this isn’t funny.” 
“On what situation is what we’re doing considered as just friends?” His words immediately made you look back at him. 
“I don’t know! You never really said anything about us being a thing, anything, and…” You found it hard to admit that you basically were asking for his affection. “Nevermind, this is stupid! Let’s just get back to the movie…”
“Look at me.”
“No.” You refused, even when your heart was beating faster at his request. 
“Y/N, look at me.” He said again, this time softly grabbing your chin to make you face him. 
Not a single word came out from him after that, only him dipping down quickly to meet your lips. You were surprised but shortly melted into his kiss and found yourself returning it. He was taking his time tasting your lips. His kisses were very gentle that it almost made you beg for more. Slowly his tongue made an entrance and you welcomed it swiftly. A small low moan escaped your lips as you parted them wider for him to access you. 
And when it was done, mainly because both of you were completely breathless, Yoongi hugged you. He chuckled and this time you couldn’t help but to smile as well. 
“I like you. Maybe in love at this point.” He confessed with you still wrapped in his embrace. “I couldn’t recall when exactly the shift to love began and I’ve been thinking to myself these past few weeks… but every time I see you, I keep wondering if there was even any moment when I wasn’t.”
You blushed at this and snuggled closer, hugging him tighter.
“I feel like I’ve been buying extra portions of my food a little too often, been on Instagram more just to send you some random internet memes that you like so much, been making sure I hear that door opening sound when you come home from work, been thinking about you twenty four seven that my music starts to have your vibe, the melodies just sound like they were made for you and I couldn’t even explain how…” He chuckled at the last mention. “The composer even told me that my work has a romantic touch to it lately.”
He broke the hug so he could look at you and smiled, showing his gum a bit. “I’ve given up cause honestly, I can’t even remember what was life before all these feelings.” He shrugged playfully. “Honestly, I don’t think I even wanna remember how life feels without these emotions.”
Your eyes got teary all of the sudden. Your view was getting a bit blurry. A small laugh, mixture of both relief and happiness, escaped your very own lips before you crashed them back on his. Yoongi immediately wrapped his arms around you, pulling you back close to him. The kiss was more desperate this time, demanding, needy, but most importantly, filled with overwhelming feelings you both had for each other. 
Yoongi swiftly pulled your body and brought you on his lap without breaking the contact on your lips. A muffled squeal came out from you, but you instantly put your arms over his shoulder, deepening the kiss. 
After moments of tongue dancing between the two of you, you pulled back first because once again he had you breathless, but it seemed like he didn’t want you to rest yet, as the moment you pulled away, his lips found their way on your neck, leaving trails of the softest kisses. You bit the insides of your lower lip, trying to subdue the moans that were eager to get out. His thigh being exactly between your legs was certainly not helping you either. Hearing you trying to conceal your voice made him looked up. The sight of you flinching concerned him. 
His right hand palmed your cheek. “I’m sorry, are you uncomfortable? Is this too much?” 
You blush at the tenderness and shook your head in disagreement. “No… uh, I’m not uncomfortable…”
Yoongi smiled at you and quickly kissed your forehead. “Okay.” He simply said, before he went back to put his attention on your neck, showering it with pecks. You were still making low sounds, not trying to conceal your voice as much, just humming with your mouth closed. Your body was still tense but was progressively easing the more his lips kisses you. 
His hands started to move up underneath your top, just shyly under your bra, as if he wasn’t sure if you would grant him more than that. When an open-mouthed moan finally came out from you, Yoongi took it as his green light and began to bring the movement of his hands upwards, gently fondling your clothed breasts, which promptly made your body turned into jelly against him. You could only bury your head on his neck, letting him continue toying your chest. 
Your eyes shot open at the feel of him unclasping your bra. The touch of his palms meeting your bare breasts sent heat through you that instantly went south. You whimpered and hugged him close, burying your face further on his neck. 
“You okay?” He chuckled, not stopping but decreased the pacing of his hands. The angle now making it awkward due to your body pressing closer to him. 
“I’m just shy.” You said while still not moving from your position. 
“You don’t wanna continue? Cause I don’t mind.” He said as he moved one hand to soothe your back. 
“N-no, Yoongi I just… kinda just getting all insecure cause it’s the first time you’ll be seeing me and I’m just scared if I’d look weird to you.” 
“You’re perfect.” He told you and he meant it. 
“I haven’t done this in a while.” You said with a slight moping tone. 
“So do I.” He took your hands to pry them apart from him. He guided them to his chest where you could feel his heart beating rapidly. “Do you think I’m not nervous?”
You looked at him and couldn’t help but to smile. But when you looked down, you realized a growing bulge was present and that seemingly he was not only nervous, but excited as well. 
“You also seem excited…” You giggled. 
“Not exactly my fault now is it.” 
“It’s okay,” You looked up to the ceiling. “I may or may not be soaking through my panties now as well.” That earned a groan from him. 
“Do you want me to help?” He breathed out. His hands now holding your waist steadily, thumb grazing your underboob. “Or we could totally just makeout and it’s alright.”
“Yoongi.”
“Yeah?”
“Continue… please.”
He groaned once again before lifting both your top and bra at the same time. As the garments sat just above your chest, the view of your nipples perking out just for him had the man salivating. Slowly, he lifted you to his side and laid you down so you could rest on your back on the sofa. He bent down and proceeded to pepper your chest and breasts with soft feather-like kisses, almost as if you would break if he pressed harder. He looked up and felt his ego somewhat boosted with the scene of you biting your lips, whimpering. 
He kissed your right nipple and began to sensually nip and twirl his tongue around it, that was it for you. You fully moaned when his right hand pinched your left nipple and twisted it. You brought your hand to your mouth, trying to repress the arousing sound coming from your mouth from being too loud. 
“It’s just me.” He mumbled into your skin, one hand went to trace the line on your back. 
But that’s the problem. Yoongi himself was your main weakness. 
He continued to play with your twins, lapping the buds with his tongue, making sure he gave both of them the same treatment. Slowly his right hand traveled downwards, caressing your middle through your sweatpants. Your breath hitched. 
“Everything okay?” He asked again. 
“Y-yeah.” You managed to vocalize. 
“Can I take these off?” He said, tugging slightly at the band of your pants. 
You only nodded and he kissed your forehead. He proceeded to deliberately slide down your bottoms, leaving you with your exposed panties. 
Yoongi gulped at the sight of your damp underwear. A small patch of wet spot could be seen and he could not lie to himself and felt proud of his doings. He bent down and kissed your lips for a second before flashing a soft smile. 
“Can we continue in your room?” Before you answered, he followed. “I want you to feel comfy while I eat you out.” 
That sentence almost had you hollering.  
“Okay…” You breathed out heavily and took his hand, dragging him inside your bedroom. 
Just after he closed the door, for a split second you saw a smirk visible on his face, before he scooped you up in his arms. You gasped, and he quickly pecked your lips before gently laid you on the bed. He brought his right hand to caress your thigh softly, slowly moving upwards to your crotch area. You moaned instantly at the contact. 
His middle and ring finger moved up and down, petting your core through the cotton cloth. The pace slowly increasing, and so did the volume of your pleas. You could feel your body turning into jelly already when neither his fingers or lips had touched your naughty bits yet. 
Finally you felt one of his finger tugging and pulling your underwear. You gladly, almost too eagerly, helped him by wiggling out from it, as you watched him pulling it loose and dropped them to your floor. He pulled you slightly so you were close to the edge of your bed, and he bent down on his knees. He gaped at your glistening core, and he really was ogling for a hot minute, lost at his thoughts. 
“Stop staring at me like that.” You quickly clamped your legs together. 
“I’m sorry, I just couldn’t believe this.” He chuckled, hands on your thigh, meddling your legs back to spread out for him. “I haven’t done this in a while…”
“You’ve told me.” Your eyes searched for his. 
“No, I mean, I might be rusty… if it feels weird or if you wanna stop, we can stop anytime.”
You could see the nervousness and self-consciousness in him and it made you wanna love him even more. 
“I just wanna taste you so bad right now.” 
He hunched closer in between your legs and dived in. He licked a bit, tasting you in his tongue. At that moment he decided it was his favorite flavor. He licked a full strip your labia, before then letting his tongue danced around it, making out with your cunt. He tried to make a mental note on which part made your back arched, which side made you moan louder. Hoping the next time, if you would let him, he promised himself he would make you feel ten times better. 
A loud yelp came out from you when he slid in his middle finger. You bit your lips, feeling shaky. He carried on trusting you, slowly in and out, pacing increasing at the same time as his tongue on your clit. He then added his ring finger and you felt it effortlessly sliding into your sopping wet hole. The attack from both his tongue and fingers quickly trembled you down. You felt your stomach came into a knot and your insides clenched. 
“Y-Yoongi… I…”
You could not form a sentence and Yoongi seemed to be too immersed to respond your pleas as he kept his tempo. You were grasping onto the bedsheets, back arching towards him, and then the orgasm hit you. 
The image of Yoongi smirking with your slick trailing down his chin would now be forever embed on your brain. It would certainly be in your dreams for quite some time. 
“That was… okay, right?” 
“That was incredible.” You said through panting. 
The guy smiled and kissed the crown of your head. He pulled his t-shirt off in one go and kissed you once again. You broke off the kiss first, pulling him by the neck so he could crawl on the bed with you. Now with you under him, he then kissed your neck before sliding your cropped top over your head, making you fully bare before his eyes. 
“Beautiful.” Yoongi said in a low voice. 
The compliment flipped your stomach upside down. “How come I’m the only one completely naked…” 
Your comment earned a smile from him. “Would you help me then?” 
You blushed, but did not oblige. You didn’t waste any time and helped him out from his pants. 
“Wait.” 
He suddenly stopped mid through. His pants were already down to his knee area, and it couldn’t be helped that all your attention were now heading towards his massive bulge that wasn’t in any way shy behind his boxer brief. He stepped down the bed, finally taking off his pants fully. You could see him taking out something from his back pocket before he let the cloth fell down joining the rest of your clothings on the floor. 
“You came prepared.” You commented with a teasing smile after seeing the item he took out from his pants. 
Yoongi just looked at you with a hint of red decorated his cheeks. You found it extremely adorable that he was bashful about it. 
You took his hand and pulled him back with you on the bed. He put the condom on your bedside table, before dipping in to kiss you. It seemed like you both had found out that kissing each other was the best thing and you felt dumb for not doing it sooner. As he kissed you passionately, you were hesitant for a second, but you slowly brought your hand to feel up the swelling bump on his below. You swallowed his groans in the kiss as you continue to stroke up and down. Breaking the kiss, you mumbled something about wanting to return his favor, but Yoongi grabbed your wrist immediately, stopping you from taking off his boxer. 
“At this rate I’m going to cum in my pants so maybe next time, sweetheart.” He kissed your forehead.
When he free himself from his underwear, your jaw dropped along with it. Of course you were no saint, you had caught a glimpse of his groin area before when he wore that one gray sweatpants that you fancied. You were in fact suspecting that he was at least a little above average, but not this. He had completely proven you wrong. Quite frankly, you had never thought about how beautiful a male part could be until you saw his. 
You gulped your saliva and salivate the mesmerizing scene in front of you, watching as he ripped the condom pack with his teeth and rolled the rubber from his tip downwards. He positioned himself in between your legs, sliding his tip up and down on your entrance, which made you whimper instantly.
“Yoongi… please…” You pleaded.
“If it hurts even just the slightest bit, let me know, okay?” He said, caressing your hair. 
You only nodded and soon after you felt his tip entering you ever so gently. You moaned loudly and it seemed like the movement not only affect you, but Yoongi also, as you saw him closing his eyes shut, grunting along with you. He slid in very carefully, making sure you were adjusting well with his girth. When he reached a certain length, you yelped. 
“Did I hurt you?” He suddenly asked out of worry. 
“No… it just… it just feels very full.” You managed a smile to reassure him. 
“Okay.” He breathed out, combing his locks through his fingers. “Let me know when I can move.”
You touched his hand to catch his attention. He looked at you with a wary expression. “You can move, I’m not that fragile.” 
He muttered a stuttered “okay” before sliding himself deeper. He lunged deep and out slowly, making love to you passionately. He intertwined his fingers with yours, going on a soft tempo, as if he was trying to confess his feelings through, making sure you feel how sincere he was. You brought your hands to cup his face, then stroked his hair, before putting them over his shoulders to pull him close. Your lips met again in the middle, muffling your moans through the tongue lacing activity. His hands were cupping your breasts, fondling with them as your kisses went harsher and sloppier. 
And when he moved from your lips to kiss your chest, you bucked your hips against him, with your hands ruffling his hair as he tongue your nipple carelessly. His tempo began to distort and the knot in your stomach started to feel too much and you knew you were close. 
Not long after you came to release, he followed soon after the feeling of you clenching hard over his cock. The sound of both your heavy breaths filled the room. Yoongi once again dipped down to kiss you. Starting from your forehead, your nose, your cheek, and lastly your lips. You giggled in between every single one. He then got up to tie the ends of the condom, timidly walking towards your bathroom to where your bin was. When he was done, you were now lying to your sides, curving your legs in a fetal position.
Yoongi approached you and slowly cuddled you from behind. You automatically scooted closer to his body warmth. 
“This is oddly familiar.” He chuckled. 
You recalled the first time you spent the night at his place by accident, when you woke up with him cuddling you exactly like this. Minus the nakedness of course. 
You turned your body to face him. A huge smile was plastered on your face. “I hate you.”
“I’m sorry?!” He eyed you with an annoyed expression. 
“I’m so madly in love with you it’s insane!” You smacked his chest lightly.
“I’m sorry, I guess I was just afraid of moving too fast. I haven’t been in a relationship in a long time and I was worrying if I’d make you uncomfortable…” 
“I thought you had decided that you don’t like me or something… I was even jealous of Cookie when you kissed him!”
“I noticed.”
“You noticed?! And you chose to do nothing???” You huffed.
“You looked cute so I decided to leave you be.” He snickered. 
“You’re evil.” 
“You’re evil for wearing that extremely tight crop top today.” His eyes travelled down and up to your nude body.
“It was… on purpose.” You bit your lips. “I guess it worked? Haha?” 
He raised one of his eyebrows at you and smirked. “Give me five minutes and we can go again.”
“Oh my god??? Who are you?! Give me back my cute and shy Yoongi!” 
You squealed as he laughed and hugged you close. 
“I love you.”
“I love you too.” You said, followed by a loud smack of smooch to your cheek from him, then he flashed you his gummy smile. 
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Thank you for reading! 💎
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taglist: @yunaurlove @waitaminswife @yoongisababygoat @hazyjoon @callsignwidow @ai-des-blog-blog @jovanaprime @bangtanmisser7 @angelk0503
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pawsci · 1 year
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ethan landry — touchy
warnings: smut. porn what plot, ( kindve pleasure / service ) dom ethan, but he’s a little mean. thigh riding, petnames, praise, teasing, degradation if you squint. a nice healthy sprinkle of dumbifictation, use of ‘sir’ like once. edging ( ? ), small bit of aftercare.
let me know if i missed anything, it’s a little short if i’m bein honest T_T
extra: no ghostface, a little bit inspired by a tiktok i found. ( @suomae, just my own twist. )
uh reader doesn’t really speak, too dumbed out
summary: 🤭🤭
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ethan landry, seemingly an angel, a dork of some sort but behind closed doors.. man was he much different than the nerd boy facade he puts out. he was a hungry man and you were more than willing to give him what he wanted.
you were sitting on ethan’s lap, facing away from him as he did some work on the computer, you were busying yourself on your phone, playing minecraft, you were decorating yours and ethan’s house right now, tongue stuck out in concentration which he found adorable. his head was laying on your shoulder, occasionally kissing the exposed skin.
he was wearing light grey sweats and a black wife beater pleaser and you were wearing a spaghetti strap, and some cotton panties, chad was out on a trip with tara so there was no need to cover up. his hands found purchase on your lower stomach as he watched a video, a video explaining who knows what. your breath hitches and he notices, keeping his warm hands on your stomach, rubbing up and down a bit. you bite your lip to stifle a moan. he smirks at that.
“jesus baby, it’s practically dripping in my lap now.” he noticed the way you bit your lip and the video was long forgotten. you let out a whimper and his hand travels lower, yet not exactly where you need him. “keep making those sounds, pretty girl. love it when you whine f’me.” he gently grabs the phone from you and saves the world, putting it on the table and closing his computer.
he decided physics could wait. his girl was all sensitive and needy, how could he resist such a beautiful girl like you. all he could hear was your whimpers and he loves every second of it. he orders you to stand up and you do, he slowly takes off your utterly soaked panties, shoving them in your mouth to use as a makeshift gag. the action surprises you but you say nothing, not that you could anyways. tasting yourself was always weird but not unwelcomed.
he settles you on his right thigh. “y’know what to do, start movin’. this is the only way you’re getting off tonight. punishment for distracting me from my work.” well, you take what you can get so you don’t complain. you start to move your hips and his hands settle on them, helping you move back and forth. “atta girl, just like that. get off on my thigh.” you whimper and he his hands start moving up, removing your tank top, he grabs your boobs. he kneads them and it only makes you wetter. if that was even possible.
you’ve been at this for who knows how long, because as soon as you start feeling that high his hands stop you from moving but you’re too dumbed out to even speak, only moans and whines left your lips and it was pure heaven for ethan, but quite literal hell to you. he’s raking it all in, eyes not leaving you even once. finally letting you move your hips again. he almost forgets to stop you because you looked so pretty like that, he loves it when you cry and beg.
“please, need you s’bad.” you cry out, well as best as you could with your own panties in your mouth. “what was that baby? ya say something?” all he did was laugh at you, at how absolutely pathetic you looked right now, all fucked out. “barely even touched you, and you’re already begging for more.” he pinches your nipples and you swear you saw god.
he takes the panties out of your mouth, the taste of cotton still on your tongue as a reminder. he puts them in his pocket opposite of the leg you’re fucking yourself on currently. “i- i said please. i need you so bad.” he meanly replies. “i don’t think so baby, i think you can get off like this. can’t you? slut.” his words were absolutely filthy and it only made you move your hips faster. “that’s a good girl. fuck, you look so good like this.” the way his voice was practically vibrating in your ear, the way his hands didn’t stop touching you, his kisses on your shoulders and the way he practically is moving you himself. it was all too much.
“please i wanna cum oh sir please let me cum.” you begged and begged. he groans and he feels his cock strain against his boxers, dick twitching as soon as you called him sir, making him weak. besides who was he to deny you when you were oh so pretty when you begged. “awh look at you asking so nicely, well since you’ve been such a good girl for me, yes you can cum.” so many “thank you’s” fell from your lips it was all becoming blurry, barely even hearing him say yes, chasing your own orgasm. “i’m gonna- fuck, i’m gonna cum.” you practically yell that out.
“go ahead and cum, pretty girl. make a mess on my thigh.” and you did, and it hit you like a truck. so hard that your vision turns white for a few seconds. you almost fell forward if it weren’t for the hands holding you up, you feel them cup your face but you feel faint, almost like falling asleep. you close your eyes to rest them for a bit.
“baby? come back to me. it’s okay, you’re okay.” he realizes you’re still in the headspace and he picks you up bridal style. he ran a bath, gently placing you in the tub. he doesn’t wash your hair since you’re in and out of consciousness and washing the hair of someone who’s head keeps falling forward isn’t very fun. he smiles to himself, loving the vibe he’s created. he tells you how good you were and all you could do was nod and smile at his words.
after he’s done he picks you up and dries you, carrying you to the bed before placing you down, he puts you in one of his shirts and his boxers since he didn’t want too much pressure on where you’re sensitive ( don’t worry these are new. ) he takes his own shower and dressed himself in new sweats and no shirt, throwing the dirty clothes in the hamper. he took care of himself in the shower. you start to come to as he settles in after turning off the lights. groggily you sit up and rub your eyes which he finds so so cute.
“hey baby, you doin alright?” you nod. “words, pretty girl.” he says. “yeah i’m fine, e. you doin okay?” you suddenly ask, cuddling up to him. “oh my oh so sweet and considerate girl, i am doing fantastic.” he smiles at you, holding you close. you cuddled into him before speaking.
“you need aftercare just as much as i do, e. let me hold you. you’ve done enough for me.” his heart softens at that, you truly did care about him. “fine i’ll listen, i love being babied.” you smile at that before changing positions, his head on your chest as you play with his hair while giving him forehead kisses. with a sigh of content you both drift to sleep.
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© landrywrites 2023
, posersays : tehee :3 hope u like . uhm third fic and it’s almost pure filth.. i don’t know if i like this one or not tbh..
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pedrospatch · 2 years
Text
to do the right thing l part ii
Post Outbreak! Joel Miller x Pregnant! Female Reader
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series masterlist
summary: Joel has a hard time dealing with things as the pregnancy progresses; you and Joel ask Bill and Frank for the favor of a lifetime.
warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, MINORS DNI. BOSTON QZ ERA. ((TW)) PREGNANCY, mentions and references to adoption, angst, asshole Joel, mentions of Sarah, softer Joel towards the end.
word count: 7.9k
a/n: i actually spent more time writing this second part, so hopefully it is a bit more well written than the first one that i wrote in an hour in the middle of the night. T_T
February, 2020
“Well, can I just say that we are just so incredibly thrilled that you two could finally come and join us for dinner this evening,” Frank beamed, grinning from ear to ear as he burst into the dining room with a bottle of his favorite red wine in one hand and a bottle opener in the other.
Bill snorted, stabbing his fork just a little too aggressively into his cut of chicken breast.
“Speak for yourself,” he grouched under his breath before taking a bite. Although he’d quit bringing his gun to the table, both you and Joel knew he had the pistol tucked somewhere nearby. You were willing to bet it was tucked into the waistband of his khaki trousers, but Joel would probably argue that it was in a less obvious place, like strapped to his ankle.
It really seemed as though Bill would never allow himself to get used to you, Tess, and he especially wouldn’t allow himself to get used to Joel. He knew it was the smart, logical choice, keeping you three around for the sake of trading supplies and resources when needed, but overall, it wasn't all that necessary. He and Frank had been doing just fine for years before you all had come into their lives after Frank had met Tess over the radio one afternoon. Or at least, that’s what he liked to believe despite the fact that during your very first lunch together, Joel had easily pointed out several flaws around the perimeter of their neighborhood—weak spots that could be vulnerable to raiders if they ever came along. You and Tess joked that Bill put Joel at the top of his shit list the moment he pointed out that their fence only had about a year left to hold strong. He’d been on it ever since.
Having you all around at this point was more for Frank’s benefit than anything. Bill would do just about anything to make Frank happy, and much to his chagrin, you, Tess, and even Joel, made him happy—having friends made him happy. Bill could do without socializing for the rest of his natural born life, but Frank, on the other hand, would lose his sanity. 
“Oh, don’t mind him. He’s just been in a bad mood because we had a massive roof leak the other day after that huge thunderstorm," Frank explained, rolling his eyes. Being the attentive, gracious host that he always was, he quickly made his way around the dinner table, pouring everyone a generous glass of wine to enjoy with their meal. “He spent hours up on that roof trying to patch it up and then damn near broke his ankle coming down when he missed the last two steps on the ladder. Can you believe that?”
“Thought I noticed a limp,” Joel remarked with an amused smirk.
Frank nudged Joel in the shoulder as he poured his wine. “I had told him to wait for you, Joel, what with you having been in construction before and all. But Mister ‘I don’t need anyone’s help’ decided to do it himself even though he has never patched a roof before in his life.”
“Tell you what, next time we’re over for lunch, I’ll go up there and check it out. Make sure he did it right ‘cause I highly doubt he did.”
Bill glowered at him.
You roughly smacked the side of his thigh underneath the table.
Joel, please, You thought silently. We need to stay on his good side.
Frank chuckled as he fell into step beside your chair. “That would be very helpful if you did, actually. It would definitely give me a bit more peace of mind, especially since the rainiest season of the year is approaching fast.” He offered Bill an apologetic smile. “I’m sorry sweetheart, but we really should let an expert take a look at it, just to be on the safe side. Joel knows his stuff, after all.”
As he reached for your glass, you quickly placed your hand over the top of it and lightly shook your head. “Oh, none for me tonight, thank you,” You declined politely. The wine was normally your favorite part of any meal they hosted, seeing as Bill and Frank, who were both quite the wine enthusiasts, knew how to make the most heavenly of pairings. It really was a fucking shame that it would be at least a few more months before you could drink again. Lord only knew you could use the alcohol after all of the bullshit that had been going on lately with Joel. “May I have a glass of water instead, please?”
“What? You don’t want any wine?” Frank frowned and reached out with his free hand, pressing the back of it against your forehead. “Are you feeling sick or something? Should we be worried? Bill, where’s the reader—?”
You chuckled at his usual dramatic little antics. “No, I’m fine,” You assured him. “I’d just rather stick to water tonight if that’s okay.”
“That’s really fucking weird of you, but alright,” he sang over his shoulder as he disappeared into the kitchen. He returned a minute later with a tall glass of clean, filtered water in his hand and set it down on the table in front of you before taking his seat next to Bill. He picked up his red cloth napkin and draped it gingerly over his lap. “So, tell us again why Tess couldn’t make it tonight?”
“She, uh, she had a few things she needed to take care of back in the QZ,” Joel explained to him briefly before popping a piece of roasted rosemary potato into his mouth. The truth was that Tess had opted to stay behind and sit this one out, stating that the conversation that would eventually take place tonight would be between the four of you. She didn’t need to be there, nor be a part of it.
“Well that’s such a shame. I really miss her,” Frank lamented between bites of his garden salad. “It’s been a while since we’ve all gotten together for a meal. Hell, this is the first time we’ve seen you in what, a couple of months at least, right Bill?”
“Felt like a lot less than that. But sure, let’s call it a couple of months.” Bill eyed Joel suspiciously. “Sounded a bit urgent when you radioed in and let us know you had to come see us tonight, Joel. More so than usual. I’m guessing that you two must really need something from us.”
You and Joel exchanged a silent glance.
“Jesus Bill, can you please not be so rude to them for once?” Frank scolded, waving a hand dismissively at his partner. He smiled apologetically at you and Joel. “Again, please don’t mind him. It seems to me that we still have some work left to do with his manners.” He paused just long enough to take a delicate sip of his wine. He set his glass down, then picked up his fork and knife. “But, if you do happen to need anything, you know that we are more than happy to help you out as best as we can if we have the supplies and resources to spare.”
“Which we don’t,” Bill chimed in, earning himself a light smack to the shoulder.
Joel ignored him and instead focused his attention on Frank. He was the one to win over out of the two. “That’s awfully kind of you, Frank. You know that we always appreciate your warm hospitality,” he remarked, and although he was laying it on a little thick for the sake of getting into his good graces, there was an underlying sincerity in his tone. He actually happened to like Frank—it was hard for anyone not to like him. Joel lifted his glass of wine to him in a toast. “Of all the people we could’ve come across on the radio that day, we’re grateful that it was you.”
Frank touched a hand lightly to his chest. He then picked up his own glass, clinking the rim against Joel’s. “Well, cheers to that.”
“I think I’m gonna be sick,” Bill grumbled, shaking his head.
Joel nudged your leg under the table as if to let you know it was time.
On the way up to Lincoln, he had suggested Bill and Frank would be a lot more inclined to agree to yours and his pending request if it came from you. Joel could butter Frank up well enough, but Bill hated his fucking guts, and you probably had a better chance of winning the survivalist over than Joel did.
You cleared your throat lightly, garnering everyone’s attention. “I have some news to share. Well, actually, we have some news to share.”
Bill raised a thick, bushy eyebrow. “What kind of news?”
“News? Is everything okay?” Frank asked, suddenly worried. “Wait. Is it Tess? Is she alright? Did something happen?”
“No, it isn’t anything like that at all. Tess is perfectly fine,” You quickly reassured him, causing him to sink back against his chair in relief. You held your breath for a moment before exhaling it softly through your mouth and announcing, “I’m, um—I’m pregnant.”
Bill nearly choked on his chicken and Frank gasped, both hands flying to his mouth in complete shock. The seconds passed in silence, and the room had gone so quiet that one could have heard a fucking pin drop on the floor. You felt the heat flood to your face and nervously shoved a forkful of baked chicken into your mouth, deciding it would be best to just give them a bit of time to process the news before moving onto phase two. However, Joel wasn’t there to waste any time and decided to step in.
“Listen, I know that this is probably a lot to take in, but we didn’t exactly come over here to share that with you just for shits and giggles. As much as it pains me to say it, Bill is right,” he admitted reluctantly. That was one phrase Joel Miller could do without saying ever again. “Truth is, we do need somethin’ from you two. We’ve got a favor to ask you both, a big one at that.”
That had been enough to slap Bill back into reality.
“Oh no, stop right there! I can see where this is going from a fucking mile away!” He jumped up from his chair, furiously shaking his head as he wagged his index finger at you and Joel. “Listen here, we have been as generous as we can possibly be with the two of you, and with Tess—but there’s got to be a line drawn somewhere and this is it! There is no fucking way in hell that we’re taking you into our home, into our neighborhood! This place belongs to us, we built it, we secured it! We worked our goddamn asses off for all that we have and just because she’s pregnant does not mean we will allow you to—”
“That’s not it.” Though your voice was smaller, softer, it managed to get through to Bill over his angry ranting. “That’s not it at all, Bill. We’re not trying to move here or invade your space like that, I swear it.”
His hand dropped down to his side. “Really?”
“No. Of course not. We know you have boundaries, and so does Frank. And whether you choose to believe it or not, we do our best to respect them as much as we possibly can.”
“Oh.” Bill slowly sank back down to his chair, looking relieved. “Then what is it that you two want? You need baby clothes or baby blankets from the boutique or something?”
“Not exactly,” You mumbled. You took a quick minute to think it over in your head, wondering if there was any correct or tactful way to ask what you were about to ask of them—there wasn’t. It didn’t matter if you spun it a million different ways, Bill was still going to blow a fuse again no matter what. “We wanted to ask you and Frank if you would be willing to take the baby into your care once it’s born.”
And just like that, Bill’s temporary relief vanished.  “I beg your fucking pardon?”
You turned to Joel, saying tightly through your teeth, “A little fucking help here, please?”
“Look. Boston ain’t no fuckin’ place for a child,” Joel started, lifting his hand in an attempt to keep Bill calm this time. “Too much shit’s been goin’ on there lately. Violence has escalated, supplies are gettin’ harder to get and costin’ us more than ever before. So we want to know if you and Frank are willing to take the baby after it’s born. It would be better off here with you two than with us in the QZ.”
Bill didn’t need to think twice about it. He answered Joel with a stern, “Absolutely not.”
Joel let out an irritated sigh and dropped his fork. The utensil clanked loudly against the white porcelain plate. He dropped his face into his hands, rubbing it harshly. “Fuckin’ knew he wasn’t gonna make this easy for us.”
You chewed anxiously on your bottom lip, an overwhelming feeling suddenly washing over your entire body from head to toe. It was strange to feel this way, considering the fact Bill and Frank’s place had always been something of a temporary escape for you. Their neighborhood, their home, it usually brought you a sense of peace and tranquility—you felt comfortable whenever you were here. But between Bill’s angry outburst, his instant decline to your request, and Frank’s wide, shocked eyes still fixed intently on you, you suddenly found yourself wishing you were anywhere but in Lincoln.
“You’re pregnant?” Frank’s incredulous voice broke the silence that had fallen over the dinner table. Part of you wondered how much of the conversation he had even heard or if it had just gone in through one ear and out the other. “You’re really pregnant?”
“Frank,” Bill said his name warningly. “Don’t even think about it.”
Frank ignored him, his attention still on you. “How far along are you?”
You glanced at Joel before turning back to him. “It’s just an estimate, but we’re thinking at this point that I might be about four and a half months, maybe almost five?” You replied with a small shrug of your shoulders. “We aren’t too sure, though.”
“And it’s yours?” Bill questioned, eyeing Joel in disbelief.
Joel glared at him, his aggravated silence speaking for him.
“Oh, Bill.” Frank suddenly turned to him with a hopeful expression. “A baby!”
There had been a couple of different occasions where, while sitting outside on the front lawn enjoying a glass of iced tea in the sunshine, Frank had confessed to both you and Tess of his desire to have a family one day. He acknowledged the chances of that ever happening were virtually impossible, but he admitted that it was something he had been dreaming of since meeting Bill. He wanted to be a father. He wanted a child, and here you were, with one that you couldn’t keep.
“Frank. No.” Bill stared at him, unable to fathom how he could even think that taking in a child could possibly be a good idea. “I’m sorry. You know I try to give you everything that you ask for, but I have to put my foot down this time. I have enough trouble keeping you safe as it is! We’ve had raiders come and try knocking at our door before—”
“And you’ve fought them off,” Joel reminded him. “Successfully.”
“Not to mention, think of all the things we would have to do in order to raise a kid, all the supplies and resources we would use up in just the first year alone—”
“Bill, we know this is a lot to ask of you, of both of you,” You somehow managed to chime in. “We know that a favor like this is one we would never be able to repay you for, not in this lifetime. But it’s this child’s only shot. What kind of life would it have where we live? What kind of future would it have in the QZ?”
“Hm. Sounds like not our fucking problem,” Bill quipped. “Sorry.”
Frank’s eyes left his partner’s and met yours across the table before they fell down to your midsection. “You said you’re about four and a half months?”
You gave him a small nod.
Bill might not have been on board, but you still had Frank.
He was your only hope. 
“Yes, but again, it’s an guess. We don’t want anyone else in the QZ knowing that I’m pregnant, so I haven’t been to see a doctor. But we think it’s a pretty close guess.” Suddenly, an idea came to mind. You hesitated, at first, but knew it was your best shot at finishing the job and reeling Frank in. You slowly stood up from the table and with trembling fingers, you started to unbutton the flannel jacket you were wearing—Joel’s flannel jacket—and showed him the swollen belly you had been hiding underneath it. It was on the smaller side, but still quite prominent underneath a snug-fitting, cotton blue tank top.
“Oh!” Frank breathed out in surprise. He rose to his feet, rushing over and around to your side of the table. He excitedly lifted his hands, but then stopped himself, glancing at you for permission first. “Would it be alright if—?”
“Of course, go right ahead,” You encouraged with a tiny smile as you continued holding the jacket open for him.
Frank sank to his knees in front of you. He lightly cradled the small bump in between his palms, looking up at you with a look of absolute wonder on his face.
It felt bizarre, not only showing your midsection to someone else, but having another set of hands besides your own on it felt foreign as well.
As soon as you’d started showing, Joel had refused to go near you—the way he tried painfully to ignore it caused you to keep it hidden away underneath oversized clothes, even in the privacy of your own quarters.
During the first few weeks of your pregnancy, he’d been just fine. Well, as fine as he could be. But once your belly had popped, it was as if it had all suddenly sunk in and really clicked for Joel—this was one hundred percent fucking real now and that was his baby growing inside of you. Since that moment, he hadn’t quite been himself, at least not with you.
Joel still looked out for you, of course. He didn’t dote sweetly on you and shower you with affection, but he did take responsibility in the ways that mattered. He made sure that you were taking the prenatal vitamins Tess had found for you, he made sure that you were eating enough, and if he ever noticed that you were still hungry, he would shovel his own portion onto your plate without asking and head off to sleep on an empty stomach. He helped you out whenever you were assigned to the same work detail, taking on an extra load of work on top of his own if it meant sparing you from even the slightest risk of straining yourself or over exerting your body.
Sure, he still cared for you. He wouldn’t do any of that if he didn’t.
But that didn’t mean things between you hadn’t changed.
They had.
Drastically.
Joel kept his distance from you, physically. He hadn’t fucked you, kissed you, or so much as even touched you in the last couple of months. He’d even started sleeping on the couch, leaving you to sleep alone in your once shared bed. Whenever he spoke to you, he stood at least a few feet away, and his eyes always remained trained on your face—he took especially great care to not look at your growing stomach. You could briefly recall one morning when you’d squeezed past him in the kitchen to grab a mug from the sink while he’d been making his morning coffee; when your belly accidentally brushed against his hand, he had cringed, snatching it away from you as if he’d touched something unpleasant. Deep down, you knew this was his own twisted, fucked up way of coping with how he was feeling, but it still didn’t stop you from wishing that he’d quit acting as if you and the baby were the fucking plague.
 As much as you tried to deny it, the way Joel had been treating you lately hurt you. It cut you deep, down to your very core. You put on a good front for him and Tess, though, acting as if none of it bothered you. But the tears that you shed on the nights they left you alone to go out on their runs were endless.
“Oh Bill,” Frank glanced pleadingly over his shoulder at his partner, his hands still on your stomach. “Please.”
“Frank—”
“Please.”
Bill couldn’t refuse Frank a majority of the time. But this was bigger than anything he’d ever asked of him and it was going to take more than his usual amount of convincing to get him to agree.
Bill scoffed, narrowing his eyes at you. “Let me guess. You want us to take this baby in and you want us to clothe it, feed it, and protect it. You want us to do the real work of raising it, using up our supplies and resources. And then what? You two come along to play mommy and daddy whenever you fucking feel like it?”
You shuffled from foot to foot, wincing slightly at his harshness. “No, of course not.”
Joel wasn’t all too fond of Bill’s tone towards you. He leaned forward, throwing him a warning glare across the table. “She’d like to visit,” he informed him, keeping his temper under control. He knew better than to go off on Bill, not when you were still trying to convince him to do you both the favor of a fucking lifetime. “Every now and again, just to see the kid. But we think it’s best if we do a closed adoption, if you wanna call it that. You and Frank are the parents, and we’re just a couple of friends who come by and visit daddy and daddy every now and again for lunch.”
“Right, and you really want me to believe that there’s no chance she’s going to be attached to this baby after carrying it for nine months?” Although Bill was facing and speaking directly to Joel, it was obvious he was indirectly grilling you. And here Joel thought the man might have had something of a soft spot for you. “Think about it, Joel. You don’t think one day she might waltz in here and decide she wants to take it back? Break Frank’s heart when he has to give up a child he’s going to undoubtedly fall in love with?”
Anger simmered underneath your skin, bubbling in your veins at the insinuation that you could ever do something to hurt Frank. “First of all, stop talking about me like I’m not in the fucking room, alright? I’m standing right here, so fucking look me in the face if you’re going to talk about me.” You seethed. Frank stood up and placed his hand on your shoulder in an effort to calm you, but it was too late. “This isn’t a fucking game, Bill. This isn’t a decision that we made on a whim or that we’re taking lightly. Me and Joel are just trying to do right by this child. If you and Frank agree to take it in as your own, it’s all yours. I’m not going to take it back,” You practically spat. “Once it’s done, it’s fucking done.”
“Alright, alright. I’m going to need you to just take a deep breath and relax before you bring on early labor in the middle of my dining room.” Frank gently guided you until you were sitting back in one of the chairs and handed you your untouched glass of water. He waited patiently as you took a few sips and then took the glass from your hand, setting it back down on the table. “Listen, before we decide anything, I just have to ask—is this really what you want to do? This is a decision that you made, right? No one is making you do this?” He noticed Joel raise his eyebrows at what he was suggesting, and before he could chime in, Frank quickly added, “I just need to hear it from her, Joel.”
“This is what’s best,” You answered honestly, feeling a dull ache in your heart that had become all too familiar. “I have spent so many long nights lying in bed just thinking this over. We don’t have any other choice, not if we want it to have a chance at a decent life. That is what I want, Frank. For it to have a chance at a decent life.”
“This child is gonna grow up and want to know who its parents are,” Bill pointed out. “Thought about that at all?”
“Use your imagination,” Joel remarked before taking a quick sip of wine. “Make somethin’ up. Lie. Tell it you found it in a basket floating down the fuckin’ river. Whatever it takes. We don’t ever want the kid to know it’s us.”
“Going to be kind of hard if it comes out looking like your clone.” Bill gestured to you with a nod of his head. “Or hers.”
“It’ll be a long, long time before this child is even old enough to notice things like who he or she looks like,” You released a little scoff, tired of him using any reason he could think of to stand against it. “Bill, please. Can’t you at least think about it for the next few weeks and at least consider it?”
“No.”
Your face fell. 
Motherfucker really wasn’t going to budge.
“Well now, wait just a second.” Frank walked over to him and put his hands on his burly shoulders. “Bill, think about it. This is our chance.” He squeezed his shoulders. “To have a family. A real family.”
“Family? It’s not our fucking kid—it’s not a part of me or you.”
“But we’ll love it like it is! Blood isn’t what makes a family. Love is,” he reminded him softly.
You swallowed back the lump that had risen in your throat.
Bill might have been a stubborn jackass, but you knew that Frank would show him how to be a good father. He had already shown him how to be an amazing, loving partner.
“So?” Joel prompted. He crossed his arms over his chest, leaning back into his chair.
Bill scowled at him. He said nothing as he reached for his glass of wine, chugging every last drop in one long gulp before he stood up and stalked out of the dining room.
Frank had his answer.
And so did you and Joel.
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As the next several weeks turned into months, pregnancy—and your ever ongoing attempts at hiding it from everyone in the Boston QZ—had really started to take its toll on you, physically, mentally, and emotionally. Joel had given you all but his entire wardrobe, helping to keep your condition hidden as well as possible, but it was taking a hell of a lot more than just his jackets and shirts to keep it a secret. When you entered your third trimester, you were starting to struggle immensely with work detail, finding it more and more difficult to keep up with what authorities expected of you. Everything ached—your feet, your back, and even the hairs on your fucking head were hurting, and yet you were forced to carry on with your daily duties as best you could to avoid raising any suspicions.
“Frank said it might be best if you gave birth at their place,” Joel commented over dinner one night. Tess was out doing a solo run, and it had just been the two of you for the last couple of days. Lately, you almost wished she would stop leaving you alone with Joel. Ever since that night at Bill and Frank’s, he had been acting a lot colder towards you, more than ever before. He could hardly look at you most days. Before, he could at least stand to look at your face. Now, there wasn’t a single part of you that his eyes could meet. “As soon as you start feelin’ off, we’re gonna need to get you over to them. Frank talked Bill into lettin’ you stay for a few days if it comes down to it and you need some time to heal.”
You simply nodded, your gaze fixed on the torn paper napkin in front of you. “Okay.”
He bit into his piece of jerky, his eyes also glued to the table. Out of his peripheral vision, he could see that you’d finished your portion already. He reached out, dropping his piece in front of you onto your napkin. ���Need to eat more,” he grumbled. He picked up his glass of whiskey, polishing it off before pouring himself another. 
You couldn’t stand it.
You couldn’t fucking take it anymore.
“Joel.” You said his name in a smaller voice than what you had been aiming for. “Can we talk?”
He racked his brain for the first bullshit excuse he could think of. “It can wait. S’real late and we need to get to bed soon. We got early work orders tomorrow.”
“No, Joel, actually, it can’t fucking wait.” Your heart was pounding at a rate that felt far too fast for your body and you tried to remind yourself to remain calm. You knew you needed to keep your emotions in check, or else your distress could cause distress to the baby. “We need to talk. Now.”
Joel drew an impatient breath. “Talk ‘bout what, exactly?”
“About how you’ve been acting over the last few months.” Your voice trembled and you almost kicked yourself for it. The last thing that you needed to do was fucking crumble. “And about the way you’ve been treating me, too. You’ve been keeping your distance from me, acting like I’m some kind of—I’ve seen you cringe a lot less when dumping the infected bodies into the fire pits, let’s just put it that way.”
“Those pregnancy hormones,” he released a short, bitter laugh. “Got you bein’ all dramatic.”
“I am not being dramatic.” Your hands curled into tiny fists. “You won’t talk to me. You won’t touch me. You won’t even fucking look at me anymore! I’m sick of it, Joel.”
“It’s nothin’,” he replied dismissively, shrugging his shoulders. He looked down into his whiskey, feigning a sudden interest in the rich amber hues in his glass.
“Nothing?” You repeated, flabbergasted. “Then why haven’t you slept in our bed with me? Hm? Oh that’s right, because you can’t fucking stand to be that close to me! You’d rather break your back on that old fucking couch rather than sleep next to me.” 
Joel’s jaw clenched, his grip around his glass tightening. “Listen, I ain’t doin’ this right now, alright?”
“Joel.” You hesitated. If you crossed this line and pushed one too many of his buttons, there was no fucking going back. “I know that you’re afraid, okay?”
“I ain’t afraid,” he countered through gritted teeth. Finally, he brought himself to look up at you, his eyes meeting yours—that same emotion that he’d just denied was right there behind them as clear as the fucking stars in the sky outside. Joel wasn’t made of stone. He wasn’t any kind of special exception to having normal human feelings. He hid everything pretty well, and because you cared about him, you were willing to put up with his asshole façade because he needed you as much as you needed him. Still, even after years of trying to take the wall he’d built down brick by brick with your bare hands, you hadn’t gotten very far and you wished the man would help you out every now and again and throw you a fucking hammer. “Ain’t no reason for me to be afraid. I ain’t the one who’s fuckin’ pregnant.”
“It’s yours too! This is your baby too, Joel. Your child. It is part of you, just as much as it is a part of me. And ever since day fucking one, you have been scared shitless of it,” You confronted him, another trembling edge coming to your voice. “And I know why, okay? I know that what happened to Sarah—”
Joel froze, going rigid in his seat. His free hand had curled into a fist, his tight knuckles turning ghost white.
It was something of an unspoken rule. 
Nobody talked about Sarah.
Hell, the only reason you even knew about his daughter was because you’d accidentally stumbled upon an old polaroid of her while washing his jeans in the kitchen sink one morning. You had found it in one of the back pockets while cleaning them out, the photograph heavily creased as if he spent ample amounts of time folding it open and then folding it closed again. Sarah’s name had been scribbled on the back of the polaroid. Her smile, her nose, it was all Joel, and it had taken you less than sixty seconds to realize the young teenaged girl posing goofily in the picture had been his daughter.
When you’d handed the picture to him while his jeans dried, it was like a silent bomb had detonated. Although it’d been a mere accident on your part, Joel had been so incredibly angry with you, as if you had gone snooping through his past life on purpose. For weeks, he hadn’t said a single word to you unless it had something to do with work or a run.
He’d lost her. He hadn’t told you that, but you’d guessed it.
Whether it was to infection or something else, you didn’t know. And you knew better than to ask him. All you knew was that losing her had done something irreparable to Joel Miller. Whoever he’d been before losing his daughter was dead too.
“Don’t,” he warned, his voice strained. “Don’t you fucking dare.”
“Joel, please,” You whispered. “Whatever happened to her, you can’t possibly keep it to yourself for the rest of your life. You can talk to me about Sarah—”
Joel slammed his curled fist down onto the table, startling you. He then turned in his chair and flung his glass at the wall behind him, the sound of it shattering into hundreds of pieces echoing throughout the small apartment. Jumping to his feet, he pointed a threatening finger in your face. “Don’t you ever utter her fuckin’ name ever again! You understand me?”
“But Joel—”
“Do you fuckin’ understand me?”
“I understand.” You hardly recognized the squeak that left your lips.
“Go to bed. Now,” he ordered, whirling around on his heel. “It’s fuckin’ late.”
Without another word, Joel stalked over towards the couch and dropped onto it, rolling over onto his side so his back was to you.
You pulled the neckline of his shirt that you wore over your mouth and pressed your palm against it in an effort to muffle a sob.
A few hours later into the middle of the night, Joel had awakened and stood up from the couch only to find you sitting there in the exact same spot where he’d left you at the table. Though it was dark in the apartment, the moonlight that shone through the torn curtains over the window illuminated your face and he could see you hadn’t stopped crying since he’d fallen asleep.
“Y’need to go lay down,” he told you quietly.
You knew this tactic all too well.
His way of apologizing for losing his shit on you without actually apologizing.
“I’m fucking fine right where I am,” You snapped stubbornly in response, quickly dabbing at your damp eyes with the back of your hand. That was a downright lie. Your lower back was on fire from having sat in the chair for so long.
Joel sighed, hanging his head. He knew he’d fucked up. He’d been fucking up for the last several months. He pulled a chair around in front of yours and sat down, his knee touching yours lightly. That alone was enough to send a chill throughout your body. “Sittin’ in that chair for too long ain’t good for your back,” he stated. He waited to see if you would speak and when you didn’t reply a couple minutes later, he sighed again. “Look, I’m real sorry about earlier, alright? Hell, I’m sorry for everythin’. You were right, I’ve been treatin’ you like shit and you definitely don’t deserve it.”
Stunned, you looked up at him.
“I was angry, but I shouldn’t have lashed out on you the way that I did. Much less while you’re in this condition.” He paused, reaching up to rub his face tiredly with one of his hands. He then let it fall back down to his thigh with a loud slapping sound. “It’s a sore spot for me, alright? Always has been and always will be. Nothin’ or no one is goin’ to change that, not ever. Not even you,” he admitted, shoulders sagging as if the realization had just come to him. “You know you mean somethin’ special to me. You know I care about you, and you know you’re what has kept me goin’ these last few years. I’d do just about anythin’ for you. But I need you to respect that I don’t wanna talk about her and I don’t want you bringin’ her up. She is from my past and that is where I need to leave her.”
“But why?” You frowned, wiping a stray tear that had fallen away from your cheek. “That’s not fair to you or to her. She doesn’t deserve to be forgotten about.”
“That what you think it is? That I’m tryin’ to forget about her? Impossible. Not a single day goes by that I don’t think of her.”
You placed your hands down onto your lap and started wringing them together anxiously. “It’s not that I think you’re trying to forget about her, Joel. But you refusing to talk about her, it’s erasing her memory, whether you think of it that way or not.” Noticing him wince at your words, you wanted nothing more than to reach out and touch him—stroke his cheek, hold his hand. But you were finally getting somewhere and you knew better than to move too fast, so you willed yourself to keep your hands to yourself. “And besides that, you aren’t doing yourself any favors by keeping her story a secret. You’ve been carrying the weight of whatever happened to her on your shoulders for what, almost two decades now?”
“It’s my burden to carry, alright?”
“You shouldn’t have to carry it alone.” Your expression softened. It dawned on you. You’d thought you knew how much pain Joel had been in for all these years, but the honest truth was that you didn’t have the slightest clue. You didn’t know how bad he was actually hurting—and that killed you inside. “You need to talk about it, Joel. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow. But someday.”
“No. I can’t—”
“Don’t you trust me?”
Joel almost seemed offended that you’d even ask such a thing. “Of course I fuckin’ trust you.”
“Then why won’t you let me in, Joel?” A fresh batch of tears brimmed your eyes, and you blinked them back furiously before they could fall. “After everything that we’ve been through together. I’m carrying your fucking child for god’s sake.”
He didn’t answer. Tearing his gaze away from you, he looked straight ahead at the wall in front of him.
“Joel.”
Silence.
“Joel. Come on. Can you just fucking look at me, please?”
Nothing.
You let out a long, sad sigh of defeat. So much for getting somewhere. “Alright. Fine.” You placed a hand on your stomach and stood up from your chair. “I’m heading to bed. See you in the morning.”
As you padded over towards your mattress, Joel’s voice stopped you dead in your tracks. “Sarah was my daughter.”
Slowly, you turned around, your lips parted slightly.
“Pretty sure you knew that already though,” he chuckled in spite of himself. “She was fourteen years old. Her mom walked out on us when she was just a baby. I spent her entire life raising her by myself. Tommy, well, he was around too, but he was more of a bad influence than anythin’ and sometimes it felt like I was lookin’ after two kids instead of one.”
You walked back over to him, placing a gentle hand on his shoulder.
Joel reached up and took your hips in his hands, carefully pulling you down to sit on his lap.
“No Joel, I’m way too heavy.” Embarrassed, you quickly tried standing up.
“You think you’re heavy?” He snorted lightly, holding you firmly in place. “If anythin’, you could stand to have a bit more meat on your bones bein’ almost nine months pregnant and all.”
“Blame my nutritious, nourishing diet of jerky and stale crackers.” The sarcasm dripped from your tone. 
He let out something in between a snort and a laugh.
You couldn’t help but smile a little and draped an arm around his shoulders.
How you’d missed this. Missed him.
You leaned into him, resting your head in the crook of his neck. For the next several minutes, Joel just held you.
Just when you were beginning to wonder how long the silence would last, he broke it.
“I’m not ready to talk ‘bout what happened to her,” he explained, quietly. “Might not be ready for a long, long time. Not sure if I’ll ever be ready, if you want the honest truth. Sarah, she was my sweet little butterfly. The absolute love of my fuckin’ life. Losin’ her was the worst fuckin’ thing that has ever happened to me. It’s a wound that’s still raw as hell, even after all these years. Might even be one of those wounds that just never heals, you know?”
You lifted your head from his shoulder, your hand going to his hair. You ran your fingers through it, amazed how even after going days without a wash, it always stayed so soft. “I know you don’t want me to say that I’m sorry—”
“I really fuckin’ don’t,” Joel confirmed with a shake of his head. “Won’t change shit. Won’t bring her back. Sure as hell won’t make me feel any better.”
“Then I won’t say it.” You brought your hand back down to your lap and leaned forward. You pressed your lips against his forehead, letting them linger. He stiffened, and you could feel him restraining himself from completely melting into your touch. You knew things would take a little time and you were willing to be as patient as you needed to be for him.
“Losin’ another child—” Joel trailed off, voice hoarse. “I just—I can’t.”
“I know,” You soothed him. “Which is why we’re doing the right thing and letting Bill and Frank take him.”
“Him?”
You offered him a small, tired smile. It really was getting late now and the exhaustion was creeping in. “I haven’t had the chance to tell you. But I think it’s a boy.”
“And how the hell could you possibly fuckin’ know that?”
You shrugged. “Just a gut feeling. Tess thinks it’s a boy too. She says with the way I’m carrying, it must be—” You stopped, doubling over in pain. “Fuck. Ouch.”
Alarmed, Joel’s hand found the small of your back, the other was in front of you, making sure you didn’t fall over off of his lap. “What? What is it?”
“The baby just kicked me.” You grimaced, leaning back into a sitting position. “Right in damn the ribs too. And there goes another one.” You exhaled sharply, the discomfort radiating throughout your body. “Jesus. He must take after you with all the violence.”
Joel seemed a bit stunned. “This the first time it’s ever kicked?”
“No. He’s done it a few times before. But never this much in one sitting. Or this hard.” You winced. “He’s really fighting in there.”
Joel just stared at you, something that looked a bit like awe in his eyes.
Through the slight pain, you raised an eyebrow at him. “Do you want to feel him?”
“Oh I don’t think, uh, I don’t think I should—”
“It’s not going to fucking kill you, Joel.”
He hesitantly lifted his hand. “Where—where do I put it?”
“Here.” You took his hand in both of yours and placed it on the side of your round midsection. “Just give it a second. You’ll feel it right here.”
You watched his face carefully. He jumped slightly once he’d felt the fluttering motion against the palm of his hand, his dark eyes going wide.
Even before the outbreak, Joel never thought he’d feel something like that again in his life.
“He’s strong,” he murmured. “Real strong.”
“I know. Wonder where he got that from,” You joked lightly.
Moving his hand away, Joel placed it on your thighs and awkwardly cleared his throat. “It’s, uh, it’s pretty late. You really do need to get some sleep.”
“Okay. But on one condition.”
“What condition?”
“Will you come to bed with me?”
“‘Course.” He stood up, letting out a small, labored grunt as he lifted you up into his arms.
“I told you I’m heavy,” You reminded him with a laugh. “Joel, put me down. This cannot possibly be good for your back.”
“Oh, shut up.” Joel walked over, gingerly placing you down onto the mattress. He waited for you to get comfortable before climbing in behind you, pulling a wool blanket over both of your bodies. He pulled your back against his chest and draped his arm around you, his hand subconsciously—instinctively—resting on your stomach. His lips found the delicate spot behind your ear and he pressed his lips gently against it, sending a small shiver up your spine.
“Joel?”
“Hm?” He mumbled into your ear. He was already falling asleep.
They were right there, right on the tip of your tongue, those three words that you had been aching to say to him for years.
I love you.
“Nevermind.” You sighed softly. “Goodnight.” 
“Mm, g’night,” he murmured, nuzzling his nose into your neck before allowing his sleep to consume him.
5K notes · View notes
merakiui · 8 months
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bestie!vil who casually fixes your boobs in your bra for you, no he did not just tweak your nipple, do you think he's one of those desperate dogs you spend so much time with? He also calls you out on your posture and says it comes from the pelvis, he knows a few massages and stretches if you're interested. You want to try on his lipstick shade? Well, he doesn't want to contaminate the entire tube so...mwah! What? It's not like it meant anything, you're best friends after all.
One of the girls!Cater who walks around in his boxer-briefs during a sleepover or before bed. When you wake up he's always cuddled up to your back, morning wood grinding into you but he needs his cuddles, dont neglect him! Also he saw the prettiest thongs at VS, and since a few of yours went missing, you should totes go buy some new ones. Cater thinks you're soooo cute first thing in the morning, too sleepy and tired to realize that he slid his underwear down and has been leaking all over the back of your tanktop the entire time :(
-👠 anon (i think tumblrs been eating my asks D:)
OTL sitting in best friend Vil's lap while he does your makeup... there's nothing to it! Just two besties giving each other makeovers. If you feel something prodding at your ass every time you shift on his lap, pay it no mind. And if Vil grabs your hips and forces you still, don't worry about that either. If you keep moving so much, he'll mess up your eyeliner! You don't want that, do you?
AND CAY-CAY WITH MORNING WOOD AAAAAAAA. It's still so early and you're much too sleepy to realize his dick is between your thighs and he's been slowly and carefully rutting into you every now and then. Quite literally fucks you back to sleep. <3 just let your bestie cuddle with you a little longer. It's so warm and cozy, and he's massaging your hip so sweetly. You doze off within seconds, leaving Cater with enough time to reach his climax and clean you up before you're waking another hour later.
Being besties with Idia and the two of you watch hentai together and rank the ahegao of every character. >:D the tier list is coming along nicely. You're lying on your stomach on his bed while he's gaming, and it hasn't yet occurred to Idia that this entire time he's been hanging out weekly with a girl. But then he starts thinking deeply about it and suddenly his mind is racing with thoughts. orz
Besties with Ace and Deuce, who have slept over so many times that at this point Ramshackle is like a second home to them. They know where you keep everything. Where all of the snacks are hidden from Grim. Which drawers hold your clothes and, most importantly, undergarments. Ace is probably so sneaky and nosy that he goes so far as trying to sniff out if you've got any sex toys hidden somewhere. Deuce is curious, but he has to be nice and respectful of your space like a good best friend. He's only following Ace to make sure he doesn't do anything weird while you're washing up in the bathroom. It's not so he can also learn the location of these toys and compare his size to the size of the dildos. T_T
Being besties with Azul and he's managed to become so comfortable around you that he allows you to relax in the pool with him while he's busy multitasking with all eight of his tentacles. You're happily swimming laps and trying (and failing) to get him to take a break and join you. He keeps you at a distance with one tentacle, pushing you away and claiming, "Not now. This is very important and requires all of my focus." You pout and whine. Maybe he entertains you with that same tentacle, playfully poking and prodding at you while his eyes remain glued to the (magically waterproof) contract he's reviewing. He knows exactly what he's doing when he "accidentally" manhandles you with his tentacle, so much so that your swimsuit top comes untied. Oh dear. Would you look at that? It's come off. <3
488 notes · View notes
lovetei · 1 year
Note
Heyyy,
I saw your toxic things the demon bros will do to keep you with them and i absolutely fell in love with. More of, my mental health issues felll in love with- ANYGAYSzz
I was wondering if you could maybe do the same for the side characters¿¿¿¿
Also did you drink water today? Cuz if thats a no here you go 💧💧💧💧
And some cookies just incase 🍪🍪🍪🍪🍪
Love anonymous 👑
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I'm not actually supposed to post anything for tonight, because I don't know? I didn't get to start anything this morning so I crammed this post T_T
But love lots! Hope you enjoy this piece ^^
But seriously, I was like "Oh shit, the algorithm I don't have!" And proceed to finish this.
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What are the most toxic thing they will do in a relationship just to make you stay with them?
Versions: Demon brothers, Side Characters
Warnings: Manipulation, yandere themes, execution, mention of torture, psychological torture, love potions, Mentions of murder, framing, alcohol
Links: Masterlist
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DIAVOLO will use his authority
He's already so happy to have you by his side
And by staying there you already secured the position of the next ruler that will stand beside him
So, why do you have to leave..?
And the reasons
"I'm not fit enough..."
"I don't deserve this much..!"
"There are more people out there that are more worthy than me..."
Won't cut it.
He knows your worth and he's sure you do too.
So why?
Perhaps you're just nervous that you won't be able to match his grace?
You don't need to.
His grace is unmatched among the demons and yours is too among the mortals.
You both are on the same chapter, just on different pages.
So why make things hard for yourself?!
All you need to do is say yes and everything will be taken care of.
Clothes, food, money, status, security and literally anything.
He loves you and you does too so it's not going to be a marriage with no love...
SO WHY?
You're starting to drive him insane, MC.
And he might just do the same to you
So he'll invite you over for a fancy dinner and a few drinks
You accepted, despite knowing that Diavolo might try something after he got you drunk
Thinking that Diavolo forgot that you can't get drunk by just a basic demonus
Fool
That's what you are for thinking Diavolo actually misses something, anything about you
So he changed the bottle of demonus to an actual human liquor but neutralized it's taste by the help of his one, loyal servant
Barbatos
Not even two hour passed by and you're already putty in his hands
Dancing just like how he wants it on his palms
Then he'll slide a paper into the table to you, together with a beautiful pen
He then point at an empty line with his finger and said "Look at that MC, this line right here wants your signature."
"Hmm, why?~"
"Because it's such a huge fan of you and it needs you to become something, someone better, so why don't you give it a sign?" Is what he said while smirking.
And there you are, signing the papers while your mind is clouded with alcohol
Oh what is it?
Just a marriage contract
You don't want it?
Look into rules and regulations, Claus 5
It's against your human rights?
How foolish, you're not in the human world.
You will tell the whole Devildom about it?
Lèse majesté
And what's the punishment for committing that? Simple.
Death.
BARBATOS and his timeline power
He loves you
So much actually
At first, it was fun to be in a relationship with him
It's fun, slowly opening him up like a present and seeing the gift, a part of him that only you know.
He builds up trust for you and so do you for him
Then it started to get suffocating
He won't admit it openly but you know,
You know that the one who kills anyone who dared act close with you is him
And it terrifies you
You may allow it if it actually harms you, severely
But it's not for your protection anymore
He's doing it out of pure annoyance now
He doesn't like you around the brothers
The angels
Solomon
Thirteen
Or even Lord Diavolo
In fact, he doesn't want you around anyone.
And it's making you feel more unsafe
He's starting to isolate you from everyone and everything
He's trying to isolate you from the world
So you decided to end things with him
And he doesn't seem to take it lightly like how you expected...
How did you know?
Simple.
You woke up weeks before that break up happened
You know how it happened and you know who made it happen
It's none other than your boyfriend of course
You thought that maybe if you talk nicely with him he'll actually understand the problem
But he didn't
He started to get more and more aggressive with you
Then when the week end
It repeats
And repeats
And repeats
And repeats again
And again
But it will keep going on like that until you learn
Until you learn that there's no other option than him
No other ending than him
He doesn't mind driving you crazy if it means you'll continue to love him
So good luck, MC.
SIMEON might just ask Father for help
Ho doesn't understand!
Why would you want to break up with him?!
He did everything, MC!
It's not clear!
Nothing is clear!
You just belive that you two are not fit together..?
You don't want him to end up like Lilith..?
He doesn't care!
He'll burn these precious, white wings for you!
He'll kill for you!
He'd actually prefer to end up like Lilith rather than this!
Because, at least, Lilith managed to be with her love until her life ended...
He'd rather be a demon or a human rather then live like the adored angel he is without you...
...
You'll still leave huh?
Alright then.
I guess he has no choice but to ask Father for help
What do you mean it will cause him to fall? Oh dear, it won't.
It might actually even promote him into a higher rank.
Father wants you in his side.
In fact, the whole celestial realm want you on this side
So when he asked "Father, it seems that we need to take even larger measure to have MC side with us. What do you think we can do?"
...oh?
Luke?
What a brilliant plan.
Now,
Let's see if you can still leave knowing an innocent life, Luke, will be put under danger because of this tantrum,
Because of you.
SOLOMON and his hidden antics
Oh dear, angel
His little devil
His most prized possession
His favorite concubine,
You won't be leaving him anytime soon, dear.
When you told him that "I want to break up with you."
He kept himself quite for a while before answering "Let me give it some thought, MC. For now, stay with me."
And just as he expected you listened obediently.
But then, his grip around your waits became more rough
And the hand he used to playfully wrap around your neck became more tight
It's hard...
It's hard to feed you his love laced cooking
But he found out that you just loves, adored even, Luke's baked cookies...
And since you're a human, he knows that Luke creates special cookies just for you
One that don't contain exotic ingredients that will upset your stomach
And it just made the work of latching love potions easier for him
He'll just add a few drops and it will do the magic for him
So, all he has to do sit tight
And wait for you to crawl back to his lap yourself.
RAPHAEL will use spears for example
Haha...
But he loves you, MC..?
He might just start crying if you say more
"Sure... But I'll make sure you'll come back to me..!"
At first, it sounded like a joke and it's funny enough to make you giggle
The beautiful memories of peaceful separation didn't last long after you saw a dead body pinned by spears though
His spears, to be specific
It doesn't even make sense
You don't even know this guy...
He hasn't talk to you and you don't even know him
Hell, you don't even recognize his face...
So what's the catch?
Why is he killing completely random people...
That's what have been running around your mind
You haven't seen him around RAD anymore
And if you do he refuse to answer your questions
Except his face will lightly flush and he'll even smile a little before sa say "Ah~ It's nice hearing your voice..."
His tone, the way he says it, none of theme are innocent
And he made it known that he knows what he's doing
The curiosity didn't last long
Until you found out that the corpses aren't for you from him as a threat
It was for the families of the victims
You found out that each of them have high power among the nobilities of Devildom
And he killed them to make the families think that you're telling him to do so
It's not to make you feel guilty, it for them to start attacking you
Until you're pushed back to a corner where no one else can save you
Except for him.
MEPHISTOPHELES's way only
Ha...
Man he loves you so much...
But all he do is stare at you blankly after you told him you ant to break up
Staring at you like you're just some kid throwing a tantrum
It's Mephistopheles in front of you, I mean, he's rich, handsome, tall, smart and has good family background
If he's a human everybody would have gone crazy over him already
Plus he wears heels and he has a sexy cane
What more could you ask for?
But yeah...
You don't want to be with him forever?
Sure, he'll talk to Diavolo.
"I'll buy MC's contract and I'll put them under my wing." Is all the reason he needs to say and a few more to have Diavolo selling you
What about your family?
This amount will do right?
I mean...
He paid for what your worth so don't expect it to be much.
Anyways, you're his now
By the eyes of the law, money and his
He'll never let you get away?
And if you did try to?
He'll simply frame you for treason and let's see if you won't come crawling back to him
After finding out that he can choose what type of punishment, torture method, to give you.
But don't worry.
He likes the game cat and mouse
He don't like playing it for a long time though
So be careful
His patience isn't as long as the line of money and connection ahead of him
THIRTEEN basically holds your life
Break up?
"You're not." Is all she said as she holds your candle
She's grinning widely as she let your candle melt, its 's wax falling directly in her hands
"Why would you even want to?" She asked even though she knows, no reason can separate the two of you
And if you did say "I don't care." as she holds you candle
She might just accidentally extinguish one of your loved ones candles
So be careful, MC.
Among everyone
She's the only one who won't joke around.
And just so you know
Her patience is shorter than the amount of time it requires to kill someone's fire off of their candle.
1K notes · View notes
delusionalwriterr · 9 months
Text
See Her Smile
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Pairing: College Athlete!Bucky Barnes x Reader
Summary: With Bucky being new to relationships, he’s still trying to learn how to handle things. But how does he handle things when you’re going through something you don’t even know how to handle yourself? 
Word Count: 5.1k
Warnings: signs of depression, angst, fluff
A/N: GUESS WHO’S BACK FROM THE DEAD Y’ALL. i missed writing so much, but life keeps giving me reasons not to T_T this fic is based off of See Her Smile from Tick, Tick... Boom! it's been stuck in my head all week, and i couldn't help but write something about it.
Masterlist | Prompt List
–––––
You hear Nat cheer beside you as you watch Steve catch the ball that was thrown to him. “That’s my man!” she exclaims as you take a swig of water, watching the football team as they prepare for an upcoming game. 
This wasn’t your normal scene. If you’d ask your freshman self if she’d be willing to sit in the sweltering heat to watch sweaty men push each other around, she would laugh it off and turn back to binge watching her favorite show on Netflix. It wasn’t until you started dating one of the university’s linebackers, Bucky Barnes, did you even begin to consider watching football matches and turning up to their practices all together. 
“Come on, lighten up! Your man’s over there too,” Nat pipes up, briefly looking over at you before turning back to watch the team. You chuckle as your eyes land on his figure. You couldn’t exactly see his face, but you were able to spot him in the field considering you’ve been dating for about 4 months now. You let out a cheer as you watch him tackle another player to the ground. His head snaps towards the direction of your voice as he stands up.  You can’t see it, but you knew he was smiling. He puts his hand on his chest before pointing at you, his way of saying, “That one’s for you!”
You grin, cheeks heating up at his gesture as you feel your chest swell. Nat turns to you, a sly smirk on her face as she sips her iced coffee. “I take it that things with you two are going well?” she asks, making you tear your attention away from the field. You grin even wider before answering, “Yeah, things are great.”
You have to admit, you’d never think you would end up dating a football player– and when Bucky approached you one night at a random party to ask you out, you halfheartedly said yes, expecting that he would just take you to a random sports bar and try to hook up with you the same night. Fortunately, the date went better than expected with him bringing you to his favorite taco truck downtown and driving you to one of those retro drive-in movie theaters. However, he failed to check what movie they were playing that night and had the both of you watch a random Scandinavian film with no subtitles. In the end, the two of you decided on staying in the car and get to know each other more with the movie long discarded in the background. 
Eventually, you ended up going on a few more dates after that and got to know how sweet he really was. Sure, he was still a jock and was still getting a hang of being in a committed relationship, but you could see him actively put the effort in it so you were more than happy. 
You hear their coach blow his whistle, signaling the end of their practice which prompts you and Nat to jump from your seats and head down to the field to meet Bucky and Steve. Nat gets there first, crashing into Steve’s embrace, almost knocking him over. You laugh at the interaction before your eyes land on Bucky’s. With his helmet off, you have the opportunity to finally see his face. His hair was flat from his helmet with a few strands clinging to his forehead, the eye black on his cheeks smudged due to the sweat, and his mouth stretched into that boyish grin you grew to love. 
“What’s a pretty girl like you doing in a place like this?” he asks playfully as you approach him. He puts his helmet down to wipe the beads of sweat on his face. “Just looking for some hot jocks to kiss,” you tease, earning a laugh from him before he wraps his arms around your waist. “Find anyone you like?” he plays along. You smile, snaking your arms to the back of his neck. “Oh, yeah, I got one right here,” you giggle as you pull him into a kiss. It was soft and slow, and you could taste the saltiness of the sweat on his upper lip, but you didn’t care. 
“Hello to you too, dollface,” you hear him mumble between your lips before pulling away.  “I’m taking Steve to that new pizza place that just opened near campus, come with us?” he asks, shaking his head which elicited droplets of sweat to fly towards you much to your disgust. “You’re such a boy for doing that,” you grumbled. “But yeah, count me in.”
He smiles, but before he could get another word in, Nat interjects, “Count me in, too!” 
Bucky shakes his head, “Nuh uh, you’re not invited. Steve told me how sick he was of you and how loud you snore when you sleep.” Nat gasps before playfully hitting Steve in the chest, earning an “ow” from him. “You told Bucky?!” she shrieks, but before she could protest even more, Steve pulls her into a kiss, muttering a quick “I love you”, then runs towards the shower room. Bucky turns back to you, giving you a swift kiss. “Pick you, guys, up in 20.” 
As he was leaving, he looks back over at Nat and lets out a few loud snores, prompting her to throw a handful of dirt towards him. “Screw you, Buchanan!”  
–––––
A few days later, Bucky walks out of the field, his bag hanging from his shoulder, a cold breeze brushing through him as he begins to walk back to campus. “Hey, Buck, solid practice today,” Sam Wilson, one of the tackles, pipes up from behind him. “Yeah, man, good job today,” Bucky replies, giving his teammate a fist bump. “Me and Parker are gonna grab a few drinks, you coming?” 
Bucky laughs, the thought of Parker getting tipsy over a few pints entering his mind. He shakes his head, “I’ll pass tonight, man. Might go see my girl.” 
Sam smirks before clasping a hand on Bucky’s shoulder. “Alright, see you around.” 
“Hey, take care of Parker, alright? Don’t want his aunt to find out he got wasted over a few cocktails!” Bucky calls out, earning a cackle from his teammate as he walks away. 
He checks the time to find out practice ended a few minutes early so he sends you a quick message, knowing you’re probably still in class. 
hey doll practice finished early
want me to walk you to your dorm? i should be able to swing by to pick you up from class
He waits for a few minutes before hearing a ping from his phone, gaze immediately falling to the screen. 
no need. didn’t go to class today wasn’t feeling well. 
oh? you want me to bring you some soup?
no its ok. thank u tho
anything for you, baby
do you want me to come over tho? 
maybe next time, bucky. sorry
Bucky frowns, taking notice of the difference in the way you typed. You were colder than usual and you’d usually want to see him even when you weren’t feeling the best. He’s a bit disappointed too, wanting to take care of you until you get better, but knows to respect your wishes. So he brushes it off. 
He shoots you a quick text saying he hopes you feel better soon before messaging Sam to say he’ll catch up with him and Parker in a few. 
Looks like he’ll take up Sam’s offer after all. 
–––––
Bucky cranes his neck over to the bleachers, but frowns when his eyes land on Nat sitting alone. You didn’t come to his practice today. Bucky would’ve been fine about it, but he knows you didn’t have any conflicting classes at this time and you would’ve messaged him beforehand if you weren’t able to come for whatever reason. 
“Maybe she’s still feeling under the weather,” Steve reasons, following his best friend’s gaze towards the seats.  
Bucky nods absentmindedly in response, “Yeah, I guess so.”
He was trying so hard to hide the fact that he was getting increasingly worried. He also doesn’t want to seem too clingy considering you’ve only been seeing each other for a short time. He’s only been in a handful of serious relationships before, and most of them happened when he was still a clueless teenager in highschool. You were the first person he was willing to be fully committed to after a few months of fooling around in college so he definitely does not want to screw things up.
After practice, he asks Nat if she knew where you were only to find out that Nat was just as clueless as he was. With a huff, Bucky fishes his phone out of his pocket. 
missed you at practice today. still feeling sick? 
“Hey,” Steve calls from behind him, Nat trailing closely behind. “Nat and I are gonna go study at the library, see you there?” 
Bucky snorts. “By study at the library you mean get frisky by the shelves at the back? Yeah, I think I’ll pass.” 
Steve laughs as Nat drags him away from the field, patting Bucky’s back comfortingly before fully parting ways. This action goes unnoticed as Bucky’s eyes remain glued to his phone, waiting for your reply. 
A few minutes pass and he grows antsy. He hesitantly types another message. 
baby? 
This time, you read the message, but still don’t reply. Bucky runs his hand through his hair, a sign that he was growing anxious. He looks around the field, desperately trying to find someone to talk to so he could take his mind off of you. To his dismay, the rest of the team either left or were still in the showers. 
Bucky thinks about his next move. 
i’m coming over. 
He quickly stuffs his phone in his pocket and practically sprints over to your dorm, a million things racing in his mind. His chest tightens at the thought of you being in trouble, not really knowing what to expect when he sees you. If he sees you. 
Bucky shakes his head to get rid of the image of him turning up at your dorm only to find it empty– he wouldn’t know where to begin looking for you considering you won’t reply to his messages. This is the first time you acted like this towards him, and Bucky tries to recall everything he’s said to you lately, attempting to think of anything that could have upset you. His pace slows down as he begins to question if he was overthinking things, his mind tricking him into thinking that he was being too clingy and it might turn you off. But with the absence of your replies and the assurance that you’re okay, Bucky’s strides become bigger and he picks up speed towards your dorm. 
A head of brown hair meets his gaze as the door to your apartment swings open upon his knock. “Hey, Wanda,” Bucky greets your roommate, chest heaving and beads of sweat adorning his forehead. “I’m sorry for barging in all of a sudden. Is she..?”
Before he could finish his sentence, Wanda nods, opening the door wider for him to come in. Bucky nods his head as he enters. “She’s in her room,” Wanda mumbles before closing the door behind him. 
Bucky mutters a “thank you” before walking towards your door, about to turn the handle, but hesitates for a second. Slowly taking his hand off the brass knob, he raises a hand and places two soft knocks on the door. “Doll,” he calls, loud enough that he’s sure you hear him, but gentle enough to not startle you. When he doesn’t hear a reply, he continues, “Can I come in?” 
A few seconds later, a soft click from the other side fills his ears. Bucky takes this as a signal to slowly turn the knob and peak inside. He barely caught a glimpse of you walking back to your bed before he sees you pull the covers back to climb in, reassuming the position he figured you were in before you unlocked the door. 
Bucky steps inside and if it wasn’t for him shutting the door behind him, separating the two of you from the noises outside your bedroom, he wouldn’t have heard the sniffles that were coming out of your mouth. Your back was facing him, but he can clearly tell that you were hugging your knees to your chest as you tried to control your breathing, desperately attempting to conceal your cries. 
“Baby…” he breathes, approaching you cautiously and planting himself by your feet. Only then does he catch a glimpse of your face, your eyes puffy and cheeks tinted pink, presumably from crying for an extended period of time. Bucky frowns upon seeing you in this state. He’s seen you cry before, but it was usually from a sad movie or being stressed with homework. He doesn’t know why you are crying now, but he’s determined to find out. He places a hand on one of your calves and begins to rub soothing circles on it. “Did something happen?” 
You shake your head, not trusting your voice as you begin to wipe the tears that were still trickling down your cheeks. “Wanna tell me why you’re crying?” Bucky persists, eyes still fixed on you. You shrug and the room falls silent as you close your eyes.   
Bucky hears you take a deep breath before finally piping up. “Just feeling a little down,” you mumble, voice hoarse and barely loud enough for Bucky to catch. He moves his hand from your calf to one of your feet, giving it a soft squeeze before beginning to slowly press on its sole, easing the tense muscles and giving you a brief moment of peace. 
Bucky tries to think of what to say, but is interrupted by the sound of his phone going off. Clicking his tongue, he grabs his phone to find a text from Pietro.
hey wya? im at the study hall 
Cursing to himself, he suddenly remembers that he and Pietro agreed to meet tonight to work on a project they were partners in. Typing a quick reply to say that he’s on his way, he turns back to you before leaning over to press a kiss on your temple. “We all get blue sometimes, doll. We just gotta hang on, you know?” he attempts to comfort you, tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear. “I gotta run, promised Pietro we’d do that project tonight. But I hope you feel better soon, baby. If you need anything, just text me, okay?” 
–––––
You don’t text him at all that night. 
In fact, if it wasn’t for the good morning text Bucky sent the next day, Bucky thinks you wouldn’t have texted him at all. Your replies grew colder and you became more distant, and Bucky was suffering. 
“Dude, what’s up? If you’re not busy being a total grump, you’re staring at your phone like you’re expecting something to pop out of it,” Steve points out as he, Bucky, and Nat sit in the cafeteria to have lunch. Bucky grumbles before slamming his phone face down on the table and sliding it away from him. “It’s (Y/N),” he starts, “she’s been acting off for days now.”
Steve and Nat share a look before Nat pipes up, “Have you tried asking her why?” Bucky scoffs. “Well, duh!” Bucky exclaims, running his hands through his hair. “I went over to her’s last night, but she just told me she was just feeling a little down.”
“And what did you say?” Steve asks. Bucky’s eyes meet his friend’s as he sighs. “I told her everyone gets sad and that we should just hang on. I left after that because I had to do that history project with Maximoff.”
The table falls silent and Bucky begins to zone out, thinking that the conversation would end there, but is quickly brought back to reality when something hits him dead center in the face. “Ow!” Bucky shouts as his hand flies up to cradle his nose. His eyes land on the table, a bread roll laying in front of him, causing his gaze to shoot up at the red head sitting across him. “Did you just throw a bread roll at me?” Bucky asks, his eyes wide with disbelief and confusion. 
“Well, duh!” Nat mocks, rolling her eyes at the brunette. “I always thought football players were dumb because of how much trauma their heads go through every game, but you’re on a whole ‘nother level, Buchanan.”
Bucky blinks. “Care to elaborate?”
Nat lets out an exasperated sigh before Steve butts in, “She’s obviously going through something, Buck. You can’t just tell her to suck it up.”
“Hellooooo!” Nat interjects, waving her hand in front of Bucky’s face as if what they were pointing out was the most obvious thing in the world. “She isn’t some jock going through a losing streak or something, actually be there for her, you know?” 
“Would you cut me some slack? It’s the first serious relationship I’ve been in since highschool, I’m still getting a hang of things again,” Bucky glares. He eyes the bread roll in front of him before giving in and grabbing it to take a bite. Nat watches him, a look of disgust adorning her face. 
The three of them sit in silence as Bucky contemplates on what to do. He picks up his phone to see no new messages from you, but his eyes catch the time. He knows you don’t have classes right now, and he figures you would just be in your dorm. He doesn’t want to ruin things with you, so he jolts up from his seat, catching the attention of the couple in front of him. “I’m gonna fix this,” he mumbles to himself before storming out of the cafeteria to head over to you.
“Atta boy!” Steve calls after him.
Bucky can feel his heart in his throat as he shakily knocks on your front door. To his surprise, you answer the door this time. His mouth starts to form a smile, but quickly turns into a frown when he takes in your form. At first, his heart skipped a beat when he noticed that you were wearing one of his shirts which was too big for you, the hem of it ending just by your thighs, and the bottom of one of his boxers peeking through it. 
But once he caught the way your shoulders were slumped and the dark circles around your eyes, he knew better than to celebrate. “Hey,” he exhales, flashing a sad smile, “can I come in?” 
You nod wordlessly before leaving the door ajar and making your way towards the couch. Bucky steps inside, shutting the door behind him before following suit. He sighs when he sees you on the couch, knees tucked closely to your chest and you watch whatever show is playing on the TV, eyes in an absent daze. 
He takes a seat beside you, draping an arm across the back of the couch only for you to launch yourself towards him like it’s a reflex. You wrap your arms around his waist and bury your face into his chest as he instinctively encases you in an embrace. Bucky’s heart breaks as he hears you rack out a sob, his thumb beginning to rub circles on your shoulder. 
He gently places a kiss on your forehead as he feels his shirt become damp with your tears. “I’m sorry for leaving so soon the last time I was here,” he mumbles, lips still pressed to your temple. 
You don’t answer back right away and Bucky is forced to listen to you cry, his heart shattering after every noise that comes out of your mouth. 
“It’s just a drag,” you say between sniffles, “the world’s so mean.” 
Bucky furrows his eyebrows, not really understanding what you mean, but tries to think of something to say. His conversation with Steve and Nat replay in his mind as he desperately thinks of a reply, determined not to mess things up like last time.
“Do you want to talk about it?” he asks, testing out the waters. He takes note of your silence and whispers, “Something’s breaking my baby’s heart and I wanna know what.” 
You let out a soft huff. “That’s the problem. I don’t know why I feel so down.”
The room falls silent. Bucky could hear his heartbeat in his ears, he felt his hands grow sweaty, his throat became dry, and his eyes began to prickle as tears started to form. He prays to whoever was listening before he asks. 
“Is it me?” 
“No, god no,” you shoot up, detaching yourself from him much to his dismay. Your eyes wide as he stares back at you with the same expression. Bucky looks down and begins to fiddle with his hands, another nervous tick of his, and you realize why he’s been so persistent about finding out what was making you upset. 
Bucky was afraid that he was the reason you’re in pain. 
You attempt to pacify his thoughts by placing your hands on both sides of his face. Bucky lets out a shaky breath as he leans into one of your hands, peppering it with feather-like kisses. You give him a teary smile. “It’s just that life’s so hard sometimes, you know?” 
Bucky gives you a smile in return, a smile that doesn’t quite reach his eyes as he stares at you, trying to dig through the deepest parts of his brain to come up with something, anything, that could possibly make you feel better.
But before he could, you remove your hands from his cheeks and place them on your own as you wipe tears that you didn’t even know were flowing down your face. You stand up, causing Bucky to look at you in confusion. “You should go.”
“What? No,” he protests, standing up following you as you begin to walk towards the front door. Bucky’s mind is racing. 
Come on, dumbass, say something. Anything!
He opens his mouth, “Baby–”
“I just need to rest, Buck,” you interrupt, opening the door. “It’s not you, I promise.”
You press a kiss on his cheek as he looks down at you with sad eyes. 
You let out a small smile, “I’ll text you, okay?”
–––––
But you don’t.
You don’t text him even the day after that. 
Bucky’s mind was spinning. He felt absolutely helpless, and if it wasn’t for the harsh sound of a whistle filling his ears, he wouldn’t have snapped out of his daze. 
“Barnes!” the voice of his coach was enough for him to remember that he was in fact in the middle of the football field in the middle of practice. “I don’t know what’s wrong with you lately, but if you can’t pull yourself together then you’re benched for the next game. You hear me?” the coach shouts from across the field. 
Bucky nods absentmindedly before shouting back, “Sorry, coach!” 
He shakes his head, trying to retain focus and deciding to pay you one more visit later. Bucky didn’t know what to do nor say, but he sure isn’t leaving your dorm without mending things. 
He sets those thoughts aside for now, and turns his attention back to his team. 
Bucky figured he had totally zoned out during practice because it was only when Steve sat beside him did he realize that practice was over. “(Y/N) still not feeling okay?” Steve asks, sympathy dripping from his every word as he looks at Bucky whose eyes were going through all of the unanswered texts he sent you today. 
good morning, doll
hope you’re feeling at least a little better today :) 
don’t forget to eat
<33 
just finished my trigonometry exam lol pretty sure i flunked it 
call me if you need anything, okay?
– 
found out parker has a gf lmaooo
i kept denying it til he introduced her to the whole team 
you’d like her :) she’s smart like you 
i miss you
please text me back 
heading to practice 
i miss you so much, doll 
Bucky drops his head in his hands, tears threatening to spill. “I don’t know what to do anymore, Stevie,” he croaks. “I just wanna see her smile again.” 
–––––
He’s met with Wanda again as the door to your dorm swings open. “Is she here?” Bucky stutters, not even bothering to apologize for showing up unannounced. Wanda shakes her head, “No, she’s been gone since last night.”
Bucky’s eyes widen as he swears he almost felt his heart stop at Wanda’s words. His breathing quickens and his chest grows tight as Wanda ushers him into the apartment. “What do you mean she’s been gone since last night? Has she talked to you today?” Wanda shakes her head again, “I’ve been texting her since this morning, but she hasn’t replied to any of it.” 
Bucky runs his hands through his hair as he begins to think about what could’ve happened to you. He starts to make a list of who to call, frantically trying to think of ways to locate you. This was it, he thought. This was how he lost you forever. If he just knew what to say at the right time, if he had just been a good boyfriend to you, this wouldn’t have happened and you wouldn’t be gone. 
He can’t breathe, his mind begins to scramble and his vision turns foggy. Bucky clutches a hand to his chest to try and ground himself, forcing himself to think. 
Think, Barnes, think! 
Just as he was about to dial 911, they hear the sound of keys rattling from the other side of the door causing both his and Wanda’s heads to snap towards its direction. Bucky holds his breath, uttering a dozen prayers in his head, hoping that it was you. 
It’s only when he sees you walk through the door did the tears finally start to flow. He bounds over to you and instantly throws his arms around you, pushing your head towards his chest. Bucky silently thanks whoever granted his prayers as one of his hands fly to rest behind your head before placing a bruising kiss on your forehead. After this, he rests his chin on top of your head and looks up, desperately trying to keep any more tears at bay. 
“I’ve been worried sick, doll, where were you?” he asks, trying to hide the fact that he’s been crying, but the crack in his voice gives it away. “Hmpff mff humff,” he hears you mumble against his chest, drawing a teary chuckle from him as he pulls away. “Sorry, come again?” 
“I went over to my parents to try and cheer myself up, I’m sorry I should’ve told you where I was going, I had my phone off the whole day and—”
“Oh, sweetheart,” Bucky laughs breathlessly, pulling you back into him. “I’m just glad you’re okay.”
He sees Wanda slowly retreat back into her room to give you space. The two of you stand there in silence, holding each other as you relish in the feeling of being in each other’s arms. 
“I don’t know if I’m okay, honestly,” you say, quietly. 
“And that’s perfectly fine, too,” Bucky replies, cradling your face in his hands. “Listen I know I haven’t been dealing with this as best as I could but—”
“No, Bucky–”
“Let me finish, doll. I know I'm still trying to find my footing with all of this, but I want you to know that I'll be here no matter what, okay? When you’re happy, when you’re sad, or even when you don’t know what you’re feeling.”
You smile at him gratefully, resting your hands on top of his. “I don’t know what’s been going on with me recently. I think college is just getting to me or something. It feels like I always wanna find the rain even on a sunny day, you know?” 
Bucky continues to stare into your eyes, sadness glazing over them. You shake your head and begin to pull away, “Forget it, it sounds stupid–”
“Woah hey, no,” Bucky interjects, placing his hands on your hips. “It doesn’t sound stupid. I may not fully understand what you’re feeling, but I’m here, aren’t I?” 
You shake your head. “I really don’t wanna drag you into this, you have so many things on your plate–”
You’re interrupted by Bucky placing his lips on yours, engulfing you in a kiss so passionate, it takes your breath away. 
“But I’m in it for the long run with you,” he mutters against your lips. 
You stumble because for the months you’ve been together, the future never really fell into conversation between the two of you. With your schedules being so hectic, you and Bucky wordlessly settled with just going with the flow, and you were fine with that. But upon hearing the words leave Bucky’s lips, you began to think what this meant. 
Bucky tenderly places his hands back on your cheeks, rubbing them softly in order to soothe you. “If it feels like life is dragging you down, then hang on ‘cause I'll be your bodyguard,” he starts, earning a soft chuckle from you which urges him to continue.  “If you feel like the whole world is a red flag, then I'll be with you to look for the green, and hell, if you wanna find rain on a sunny day then I’ll be there to dance all through the pain with you, doll.” 
Tears start to flow down your face, once again, as you smile. You smile in a way that Bucky hasn’t seen from you for the past few days. He smiles back. 
“But you gotta try to talk to me, okay?” he pipes up, wiping your tears with his thumbs before pressing another kiss on the top of your head. “I know I’m a meathead, but I promise I wanna try to understand what you’re feeling so I can help.” 
You nod against his lips as Bucky lets out a breath. You stay that way for a while, and Bucky was already satisfied with how the conversation turned out, vowing himself not to push you further into talking things out. It isn’t until he hears you mumble the words he’s been longing to tell you for so long that he feels his world come to a halt. 
“I love you.” 
This is the first time these words were uttered between the two of you, and Bucky feels his chest tighten again, but this time, it was due to an overwhelming sense of joy. He pulls you tighter against him before breathing out, “I love you too. So much.”
It was then Bucky realized that he didn’t need to mend things when you’re feeling this way. As much as he’d like to take away the pain, he knew that reminding you that he’ll always be there despite it is, and always will be, enough.  
–––––
A/N: hope you guys liked this one! highly recommend listening to the song itself, cuz it brings me so much comfort and i hope it brings you comfort too! <33
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miuszn · 1 year
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i’m actually so obsessed with your bouncer!ellie.. we need a fic immediately 🤭 -🪐
taste of lust
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SETTING : modern au
WC : 5011
WARNINGS : sexual harassment ( nothing graphic ) ( but reader is sort of implied to have trauma related to it , nothing stated explicitly tho ) , bouncer!ellie x bottlegirl!reader , idk shit about clubs so like some stuff might be insanely inaccurate but i did my best to research ( sorry in advance ) , dash of dealer!ellie bc who doesn’t love her , dom!ellie , sub!reader , teasing , overstimulation if u squint , ellie calls u pretty girl & princess , readers first time with a strap , ellie refers to her strap as her cock , i’m not fluent in english yet so there might be mistakes , not beta read
A / N : hello everyoneeee !!! i know this took FOREVER to finish and i’m so sorry about that .. i’ve been super super busy and this fic was so long omg T_T there was a point i started over completely bc i didn’t like the direction it was heading to .. this fanfic shit gets serious truly . in case u missed the warning there is sexual harassment in this fic and reader is implied to have trauma related to it . putting this here again to make sure u guys see it . anyway , i took so long to post this and so much stuff happened !! but alas , it is here , the bottlegirl!reader and bouncer!ellie fic !! this is my fav fic of mine so far so i hope u guys enjoy reading this as much as i liked writing it <3 ( and yes there will be a part two !! )
— 𓆩♥︎𓆪 —
being a bottle girl wasn’t exactly the job of your dreams. having to deal with creepy rich men every friday and saturday night was definitely not something you enjoyed doing, but that was what paid the bills and allowed you to live a rather comfy lifestyle for a college student. the bad part no one tells you about going to a top college on a full-ride scholarship is that a lot of the students are rich kids who most definitely cheated their way through high school, who live in nice apartments paid for by their mommy and daddy, who use birkins and other designer brand bags as their school bags, who would never be caught dead eating at the cafeteria. of course, you felt out of place. you weren’t exactly poor, but your family definitely could never afford that kind of lifestyle.
you’re pretty. extremely pretty. and you knew you could use that to your advantage. so when you saw a new club in the city that was looking for bottle girls you immediately knew you had to apply. sure, you had to deal with a couple creepy customers every night and sometimes even had to remind them they’re not allowed to touch you, which was annoying. you also hated being seen as an object, and you knew that’s exactly how these men saw you, and what was even worse was those very unsettling “you remind me of my daughter” comments from older men since you were so young. but the money was the main thing you needed, and you were able to put up with all this because of the pay. although the salary itself is just enough to survive, most of your earnings were in tips, and you made good tips. with a little bit of flirting and pretending you were really into customers, you scored lots of tips in the hundreds and sometimes even thousands. that wasn’t really enough for you to be able to afford luxury items whenever you wanted, but you were able to treat yourself every once in a while and that was enough for you.
you and your coworker ellie are the only college students that worked at that club. she wasn’t a bottle girl, however, she was a bouncer. during busy nights the bouncers typically took turns being at the door, and the rest would be inside the club making sure everything was fine. she didn’t mind being inside, it meant she could steal glances at you. truth was, she was into you, and it was obvious. but you took it as her just wanting to get a reaction out of you. that’s what it seemed like. but you can’t lie, whenever she wasn’t looking, you’d stare back as discreetly as you could.
she was a little possessive over you, which you weren’t really aware of. whenever she saw you flirting with customers, she couldn’t deny she felt a little jealous. she of course knew you were just trying to get more tips. regardless, she still couldn’t stand seeing the way you twirled your hair, spoke in that sweet and flirty tone, and even sometimes gave them compliments, and the fact it wasn’t towards her. she wanted it to be her, and her only. she wanted you to be hers. but she never did anything aside from flirt with you a little every once in a while, because she was scared she’d make you uncomfortable.
ellie. where does one even begin to describe her? her strong arms, her short auburn hair she styled as a mullet or put in a half bun when she felt a little lazier, her mesmerizing green eyes. from the moment you laid eyes on her you found her extremely attractive, but you were too shy and didn’t know how to approach her. what’s funny is this is the total opposite of the character you put up for your customers, an extroverted, flirty girl. the thing with you is, you can flirt with people, but only when you’re not attracted to them. when you are, such as in cases like these, the main thing you do is avoid avoid avoid. you rarely had the opportunity to interact with each other, but when you did, you always felt she was trying to subtly flirt with you. it was the kind of flirting where it was hard to tell wether she was flirting with you or just being nice, so you simply took it as being nice because you didn’t think there was any possibility she could be into you. she was just out of your league. even if it was flirting, you didn’t know if she had any other intentions. so you decided to play it safe.
that night was different from the others. your boss informed you that there’d be a bachelor party tonight and surprise surprise, you’d be serving them. the thing about bachelor parties is they’re very demanding and their tips can vary a lot. and demanding in your vocabulary is basically a synonym for entitled. they’ll insist you sit down, have a drink with them, maybe even try to grope you or something. you were not happy about having to deal with them tonight, but your boss told you they were short-staffed tonight, so you’d simply have to suck it up.
the moment the group of about 15 men came in, ellie sensed something was wrong. she rejected about half of them at the entrance before being informed by her supervisor that it was a bachelor party. she didn’t really care. she knew they were up to no good.
“i really don’t think we should let ‘em in.” she crossed her arms.
“any good reason?” he asked, annoyed.
“something just feels.. off,” she whispered, “i dunno. feel like they’re up to no good.”
“i don’t pay you to do ‘vibe checks’ on people.”
“i still don’t think we should let ‘em in. feels like they have bad intentions. have you seen how they’ve been eyeing the rest of the female staff?”
“big deal, this is a night club,” he brushed her off. “that’s how men look at women in nightclubs, williams. suck it up.”
“that still doesn’t-“
“do you want to keep your job or not?” he snapped.
she sighed and rolled her eyes, defeated, and hesitantly let the group in. her eyes were glued on them until they sat down at a table, the feeling in her stomach worsening when she realized you’d be dealing with them. it was one thing for any of the other girls to have to deal with them, but for some reason, she found herself way more worried about you. you were newer to the job and a little younger than the other girls. she couldn’t bear the thought of someone possibly harming you, or taking advantage of you, or anything like that. she felt this strange desire to protect you, something she hadn’t really felt towards anyone before. she felt this way toward you, yet she barely knew anything about you.
— 𓆩♥︎𓆪 —
tonight was going to be a long night. the moment those men sat down, you could immediately tell. you could tell by their piercing gazes, which you swore you could physically feel even though you weren’t looking at them, that you’d have to remind them several times they can look but not touch. you heard them whispering stuff to each other while looking at you and then laughing and hitting each other as if they were a group of teenagers. you took a deep breath, put on a smile, and finally went over to their table.
“hey boys,” you greeted with a flirty tone, “anything i can get you guys today?”
“yeah, a piece of that ass.” one of them said, while the rest laughed.
you faked a giggle, trying to do your best to handle this professionally, as you would with all the other annoying customers.
“anyway,” you continued, “do you guys have anything in mind? if not, you can take a look at the stuff we have over there at the bar.” you said, while pointing at the bar.
“we’ll need a moment, babygirl.” one of them replied, holding out his credit card.
you nodded, took the card, and quickly walked away. you absolutely hated that nickname. before you took this job, you didn’t really mind it. but when you started getting called it by basically every single customer you eventually grew to hate it. if you hadn’t been working, you at the very least would’ve given them a death stare or contemplated telling them off (even though you knew you’d never have the balls to do anything of the sort.)
after a couple of minutes, one of them whistled at you to get your attention. strike two. another thing you very much hated. now you were even being treated like an animal. who the hell do they think they are?
you walked over to them and plastered a fake smile on your face and asked if they were ready.
“we just wanted to know what you recommend. i’m sure you drink lots since, you know, you work here.”
some of them chuckled, and you didn’t really get what was funny. but you decided to not start anything and just answered the question.
“well, we have lots of options,” you responded, “we have many of the classics you can find anywhere else, and we also have some that are less common. we just got the louis xiii cognac which is very hard to find, so i’d recommend that one.”
“yeah? are you just saying that ‘cause it’s the most expensive?”
“if you want less pricey options, we have those too.” you replied, avoiding the question. of course you were suggesting it because it was the most expensive. that’s kinda your job. you’re supposed to make money.
“we can afford it.” one of them said.
“yeah, bring us that one.” another chimed in.
you smiled and nodded, walking away. gosh, you felt them draining any energy you had every second you spent near them. you carefully took the bottle and put it on your tray, and grabbed a few glasses and put them with the bottle. you made your way over to their table, placing their glasses in front of them one by one, and although you weren’t looking at any of them, you knew they all had their eyes glued on you. you tried your hardest to pour their drinks quickly enough so you could just get out of there, but not too quickly that they’ll notice. unfortunately for you, they caught onto what you were doing.
“why’re you pouring so fast, babygirl? you in a hurry?”
tonight was going to be a long night.
— 𓆩♥︎𓆪 —
ellie couldn’t wait for her turn at the door to be over. she made sure to peek inside every chance she had, but she’d be lying if she said she wasn’t eyeing you. she couldn’t help it. she couldn’t stop looking at how the black shorts and black baby tee you wore hugged your body and showed off your figure, and she had never been more grateful for the existence of the uniform. but above looking at you because of how attractive you were, she wanted to make sure you were safe. she had dealt with lots of men like them before, and she wouldn’t hesitate to kick them out if things escalated even the slightest bit.
after a while, her supervisor dismissed her and told her to stay inside to make sure nobody was causing any trouble. of course, she went over to the area you were, since there was no one watching over that area and because you were there.
“why’re you pouring so fast, babygirl? you in a rush?” she overheard one of the men speaking to you, with a sort of entitled tone. if she hadn’t been paying attention before, she definitely was now. with the way they were acting, it seemed like they didn’t notice she was there. you were clearly uncomfortable, but tried to play it off, you didn’t want to cause trouble or provoke them. she watched closely as they kept offering you to sit down and drink with them, not listening to you no matter how many times you politely told them you’re not allowed. telling you to “just have one drink, it’s fine” and “no one will know” and they “won't tell your boss.” but your boss was not the only concern. the concern was you. you didn’t know these men, you didn’t know what they could do.
but suddenly, one of the guys sitting on the edge of the seat pulled you in by the hip and forcibly sat you down. in that moment, ellie immediately went over to the table and knew she had to step in.
“sir, you’re not allowed to put your hands on the employees. i’m gonna have to ask you and the rest of your party to step outside.” she said in a stern tone.
“she willingly sat down with us,” one of them lied, “she just wanted to have a drink. nothin’ wrong with tha-“
“i saw what happened. no point in lying. now please step outside before i have you forcibly removed from the premises.”
“yeah?” he stood up to face her. “you’re just a woman. what’re you gonna do? you can’t get all of us out of here.”
“sir, back down.” she warned.
“or what?”
she didn’t respond. instead, she punched him in the face, breaking his nose. a few of his friends stood up, but before they could do anything, some of the security had already gone over to the scene and stopped them, escorting them out as ellie went with you to the break room.
“you alright?” she asked, seeing how shaken up you were.
“i’m, uh, i’m fine. don’t worry.” you responded, sitting down on the couch, still uneasy from the experience. you hated people touching you without your consent, even something that was sort of minor like this. you were already uncomfortable, and this just made it even worse. you didn’t notice ellie had sat down next to you until she wrapped her arm around you and you melted in her embrace. you felt a little embarrassed at how comfortable you felt with a girl you’ve only had small talk with prior, but you were able to push that feeling away because in that moment, you didn’t care. the fact she hadn’t judged you and said “it’s part of the job” or something along those lines, let alone saying you were overreacting was enough to tell you that you could trust her.
“do you, uh, want me to drive you home?” she broke the silence.
“i can’t. i have to finish this shift.” you mumbled. “plus, my roommate has someone over tonight. i can’t go home right now.”
“then, if you want, we can go to my place,” she suggested, quickly adding on “but just so you don’t have to stay in this environment, i’m not trying to be creepy i promise,” because the last thing she wanted was for you to take it the wrong way and be uncomfortable.
“thanks, but, i still have to go back out there and finish my shift.”
she was a little sad. if it was up to her, she’d make you quit and happily support you. she made a lot of money for a college student, between working as a bouncer and dealing weed on the side. she had more than enough to support the both of you, but she’d never talk about anything of the sort out loud.
“i can speak to management for you,” she said, “i’m sure they’ll understand.”
you accepted hesitantly, the voice in the back of your mind telling you you’d just end up fired. but that didn’t matter to you in the moment. you had to get out of there. you couldn’t stand it anymore.
ellie guided you through the back door, making sure you wouldn’t have to face those men again, holding you by the wrist with just enough strength to make sure she wouldn’t let you go easily but not too hard so she wouldn’t make you uncomfortable. she opened her car door for you, waiting a couple seconds for you to get settled in in case you needed her help for whatever reason.
the car ride was short and silent. it wasn’t the awkward kind of silence, more so the kind of silence when there’s nothing to say. it was a comforting silence, a drastic contrast from the loud music in the club that had been blasting in your ears for the past 2 or so hours. you were looking out the window, watching the city lights and buildings as you passed them. ellie would be lying if she said she didn’t steal a few glances at you when you were looking away. she couldn’t help it, you were just so mesmerizingly beautiful she couldn’t help but look at you any chance she could.
when you finally arrived at her place, you were surprised to see she had a house and not an apartment. it wasn’t a big house, but it seemed like it could house about 3 people. you were about to ask about her roommates, but almost as if she read your mind, she said;
“sorry about the mess, i uh, i live alone, so. don’t usually have people over either.”
“it’s fine,” you shook your head, “i’m just grateful you let me come here.”
she noticed you sounded like you were in a better mood. “you feeling a little better now?”
you nodded. “yeah. i guess i just needed to get out of there.” you bit your lip in worry. “but now i don’t know what to do. i’m pretty sure i’ll end up getting fired after leaving like that.”
“after what happened to you? nah. it’s understandable,”
“are you sure? i-i mean, am i not supposed to let them know beforehand-“
“you’ll be fine, don’t worry.” she reassured you. “you’re sort of new, aren’t you?”
“not really. i’ve been working there for a couple months.”
“so you’re new. got it.”
you playfully rolled your eyes. “sure, let’s say that.”
she smiled. “anyway, you wanna do anything? or do you just wanna rest?”
“i guess we could watch a movie or something,” you suggested, “if you want, of course.” you were surprised at how bold you were. it wasn’t anything too bold, sure, but that’s only true for everyone else. for you, something like that, which others might think is minor, is sort of a big deal. not only were you at this girl’s house, but suggesting to watch a movie as well. you were a bit scared that might’ve been too much.
“yeah, sure,” she replied, “you into horror?”
“uhh.. not really..” you admitted.
“it’s fine, we can just watch something else.”
“no, no, it’s fine!” you insisted. it was, in fact, not fine. especially at this time, horror was not your thing. it wasn’t a huge fear of yours or anything, but you were a little embarrassed of the fact you still got scared while watching them, sometimes even got nightmares. but no way you’d admit that to her right there. you felt you were already being too much of a burden on her, so you’d just suck it up to not bother her any further.
a few moments later, you were both on her couch watching some random horror movie she had picked out. you didn’t even know what was going on in the plot, you were way too scared. you’d argue this was one of the scariest movies, scratch that, media in general you’ve ever seen. where did she even find this sort of stuff? ellie was full of surprises indeed.
you didn’t notice you had snuggled up to her, your head laying on her chest, from the fear. once you realized, your face turned red as you pulled away in embarrassment and mumbled some apologies as you moved away. to your surprise, she lightly tightened her grip of her arm she had wrapped around you (which you only now noticed as well), telling you with no need for words that it was fine, and you could stay that way. you didn’t really know how to react to that, but you stayed. something about her was so comforting. you barely knew her, yet you trusted her as if you’d known her all your life. it was a strange feeling. you’d been on multiple dates with the same person many times before yet you still felt more of a connection with your coworker who you had only spoken to a handful of times beforehand. you weren’t even paying attention to the movie anymore. your mind was too busy paying attention to the thoughts racing in your head to process what was going on in the screen about a meter in front of you. you had lots of questions, and the more that popped up in your head, the more your heartbeat sped up.
ellie could feel something was wrong. she lightly lifted up your chin to make you face her, locking eyes with you. she asked if it was because of what happened earlier. you felt like you should look away, but you couldn’t. something about her was just so mesmerizing. you lightly nodded, not wanting to admit all the thoughts in your mind at that moment. you looked into each other's eyes for a couple seconds, before she planted a soft kiss on your lips. it was the type of kiss that happened almost as a reflex, the type that you have almost no control over. you could feel her try to pull away after realizing what she did, but before she fully pulled away you pressed your lips against hers, pulling her in this time in a deeper kiss.
before you knew it, you were straddling her lap as she placed kisses on your neck, occasionally sucking on it softly and leaving light purple marks on your skin. you hadn’t realized how much it was turning you on until you started lightly rocking your hips back and forth, desperate to get any sort of friction. ellie realized what you were doing, and placed her hands on your waist, almost guiding your movement, causing you to let out a few soft moans and whimpers.
“ellie..” you whined.
“i know, baby, i know.”
she carefully lifted you off her lap and laid you down on the couch, hovering over you. she tugged on the hem of your shorts.
“let’s get these off.” she said, as she undid the button and slipped them off you with ease, revealing your soaked cotton panties. “cute,” she thought to herself.
“i’ve barely touched you n’ you’re already so wet,” she teased, rubbing your clit through the thin cloth causing you to moan softly.
after a moment, you started to whine, tired of her teasing.
“desperate, huh?”
you broke eye contact as you looked away in embarrassment. in the back of your mind, you couldn’t believe everything that was going on. you found it a little embarassing, hooking up with a coworker you had barely spoken to prior. but as you had been doing the whole night, you tried to push those thoughts to the back of your mind and focus on the moment.
“don’t feel ashamed, pretty girl.” she said, noticing you felt a little off. something about her caring but almost demanding tone was turning you on even more.
she carefully pulled your panties to the side, sliding two fingers in, thrusting them at a slower but steady pace. this was better, but it still wasn’t enough. you bucked your hips ever so slightly, to tell her you wanted more.
“you’re gonna have to try a little harder than that, baby,” she said. she knew exactly what you meant, but she wanted to hear you say it. you whined in complaint, hoping she wouldn’t make you say it out loud.
“use your words, princess,” she smirked while locking eyes with you.
“please, ellie..” you begged.
“please what?”
“please, more..”
“good girl,” she said under her breath, speeding up her pace and thrusting her fingers inside you twice as fast as she was before, causing you to moan and whimper louder. soon you started feeling a knot forming in your stomach, making you attempt to grip the couch.
“ellie.. fuck..” you moaned.
“i know, pretty. but you don’t get to cum yet.” she smirked, suddenly pulling her fingers out.
you whined at her words and the sudden emptiness inside you, as ellie softly chuckled at your reaction. she found it so cute. she found pretty much everything about you to be cute.
she stood up, and went to grab something from her closet. it was a bright purple strap, and it was quite big. you weren’t sure it would even fit inside you. you watched as she effortlessly took off her pants and put the harness on, walking back to the couch and positioning herself, the tip right in front of your entrance.
“i want you to cum from my cock.”
she started sliding it along your slit, coating it in your slick, causing you to whine a little, before positioning it once again in front of your entrance and slowly sliding the tip inside you easily.
you were still a little scared since you had never done anything like this before. you’ve gotten fingered before, sure, but this was the first time someone used a strap on you. especially one this big.
“ellie..”
“hm?”
“i’ve never, uh,” you stuttered, “done something like this.”
“never gotten fucked with a strap before, huh?” she said, “i could tell. you seem kinda nervous. but relax, princess, i’ll take care of you.”
the nickname only turned you on more. you didn’t get why you loved it so much. it had never crossed your mind, yet you were now sure it was your favorite pet name ever.
with that, she started slowly sliding it in, looking at your facial expressions to make sure she wasn’t hurting you. surprisingly, you were able to take it all. she started thrusting it at a slow pace, gradually speeding up, but not quite fast yet. she definitely wanted to fuck you way harder and faster, but she wanted you to get used to the feeling first.
after a few thrusts you started to get used to the feeling, and it was amazing. she sped up her pace a little more, gripping your thighs, and this time she was able to locate your sweet spot, and boy was she about to abuse it. she hit it with every thrust, making you twitch and moan at every wave of pleasure.
“good fuckin’ girl,” she praised, “already taking my cock so well.”
“ellie.. please..” you begged, between moans, “faster..”
“yeah? you sure you can handle it, tough girl?”
you nodded, and she immediately sped up. she fucked you a little faster than you expected, and it was a little too much, but the overwhelming pleasure was, at the same time, addicting. the sounds of your moans and whimpers, her groans, and your wet cunt filled the room. soon, that familiar knot in your stomach started forming again, except this time it was much more intense, causing you to try and grip the couch once again. she realized what was going on, and started using her thumb to rub circles on your clit. you started tearing up from the overstimulation which was the littlest bit painful but also overwhelmingly pleasurable.
“i wanna hear you say my name, baby,” she demanded, “i know you’re close.”
and almost on cue, you came all over her cock as you moaned her name, just as she demanded, as she fucked you through your orgasm and finally pulling out with a slight pop.
— 𓆩♥︎𓆪 —
it had been about an hour since you finished your.. activity. she insisted on getting a bath started for you, and now there you were on her bed, in one of her t-shirts that was a little big on you, freshly out of the bath. you texted your roommate before getting in the bath to tell her you wouldn’t be coming home tonight, and of course, she didn’t mind that at all.
not only were you on ellie’s bed, but you were cuddling her, trying to sleep. she told you you didn’t have to, and that she just enjoys sleeping with body warmth, but you knew better. maybe it was true, but it sure as hell was not the only reason. but you didn’t mind. you acted stupid and like you bought her story, because truth is, you really wanted to cuddle with her, and you were even thinking of similar excuses if she hadn’t brought it up first.
“you awake?” ellie whispered.
“mhm, sort of.” you replied, in a sleepy voice.
“i just, uh,” she paused for a moment, “i just wanted to know. when will i see you again?”
“on our next shift together.” you joked.
“no, dummy, i mean like this.”
you thought about it for a moment.
“i guess we’ll see,” you responded softly, “i’m pretty sleepy. i think we should talk about this later.”
she seemed satisfied with your response, but she still had the fear you were only saying that to be polite, and you didn’t want anything more or didn’t want this to repeat. of course, she’d respect you if that was the case, although she’d be a little disappointed. but she felt there was something more there, something she couldn’t quite put her finger on. you weren’t like any of the other girls she’s hooked up with before. she wasn’t exactly sure what set you apart from them, but she knew there had to be something.
maybe it was just feelings.
but even if it didn’t seem like that was the case because of your shy personality, you wanted something more. just like her.
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z3rinn · 4 months
Text
# #. KINGDOM CALLING !!
Being a Keyblade Wielder you thought you'd have seen everything by now. But you never expected to end up in a world where the villains you defeated were worshipped.
more twst x kh content because i’ve been hyper fixated on it for the past few months T_T speaking of, the reason I've been gone for so long is because I’ve now got a fic in the makings- using this exact concept! it’s posted on my wattpad and quotev, but I’m also debating if I should put it on this site… it’s quite long though! lmk if you guys think I should :]
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Twisted Wonderland was weird.
You thought you’d have seen everything by now. Being a Keyblade Wielder, your job was to travel across worlds, defeating the darkness and hate spread by those willing to conquer.
You’d experienced stories and magic you could barely comprehend, standing on the sidelines as you watched fairytales play right before your eyes.
Creatures and supernaturals were considered friends, being far different from the monsters you imagined them to be. Even talking animals were a common thing now, having traveled with Donald Duck and Goofy for a better part of three years now.
You never thought you'd miss them.
Your life back on Destiny Islands was simple. Back there, you had a home; with small rowing boats and hammocks on the tiny island a quick swim away. You had proper food, with star shaped fruits said to bind your soul with your loved ones. Most importantly- you had your best friends; Sora, Riku, and Kairi— all eccentric yet lovable characters that held your heart. You would do anything for them.
The island was a sanctuary, a place for comfort and familiarity. If you had known what you did now, you would've trapped yourself there, basking in the warm sand and cool water brushing across your body. But then, being young and immature, you just wanted to leave.
Three years have passed since then. Years full of mystery and surprise.
You had undergone many things on your journey; battling against Heartless and monsters. Falling down rabbit holes and encountering princesses every which way you turned. Meeting leaders of all kinds of worlds, binding your hearts to create everlasting friendships. You had even sided with villians, willing to set aside your differences to accomplish your goals.
It was odd… working with Maleficent.
At one point you even had your heart stolen. Ripped away from you to create a husk. And that was just the surface.
You thought you had seen everything by now....
But Twisted Wonderland was weird.
Everything happened so suddenly; kicking open an overly fancy coffin ( far different from the ones Jack Skellington used ) only to be met by a creature that looked oddly like Stitch. But before you could ask anything, he gave chase, demanding you give him your robes— how did you even get these on?
Panic stricken, you ran. Running across classrooms, hallways, and courtyards- all while trying to get away from the cat.
Questions and concerns began to gush through your mind. How could you have gotten here? Where was everyone?
And where were you?
The next thing you knew, you were in a regal library, cornered by the monster. Floating books and dancing lanterns surrounded you, all approaching with intrigue. They all seemed to be observing you, like they were anticiping something.
Blue fire brushed across your skin, the flames flickering against your robes. You realized they were waiting for a spell, like they knew you would cast it before the thought could even pop into your mind.
Just as you raised your hand, getting ready to summon your Keyblade, a whip wrapped around the cat.
Both of you jumped, eyes darting to the double doors, finding a crow-looking man standing there. He looked oddly disappointed. Your eyes immediately narrowed, hands tensing.
Just looking at him made you feel on edge.
He was radiating darkness.
His golden eyes seemed to be staring right into your soul, gazing deep and pulling you apart from the seams. They pierced through your own. Entrancing. Like they were studying and discerning your moves. You didn't like them.
They looked like a villians.
You were wary of the man, raising a brow when he introduced himself. Crowley was his name; Descendant of a Hero. An odd name for someone whose heart seemed so full of darkness. He led you to a chamber room, surrounded by floating coffins and magic. Dark energy overfilled the room, whispers and cackles echoing from robed figures as they eyed your form.
You thought back to Organization XIII.
You didn't like robes all that much anymore.
They were traumatizing.
Crowley huffed, pushing you in front of— the magic mirror? Was that the one The Evil Queen used?
The mask in the mirror spoke, blank eyes narrowing at you as if you'd attack it at any second. Of course, it had every right to be afraid. Your friend literally threw a giant key at it once. Hopefully it could get passed that though, and you could ask it how you got here?
It bullshitted something about you not having a soul, ( you had a strange inkling it was being petty but whatever ) but before it could finish, the cat broke free.
He yelled, claiming he was strong enough to be at this school, and that he deserved your spot. You tilted your head at his outburst. Was that all he wanted? You gladly would've given your spot to him. You weren’t meant to be in this world in the first place. Hopefully you’d be out of here soon.
You had Heartless to go fight.
You had to go find Sora.
A quick mishap occurred, with Grim ( you remembered his name ) setting the room on fire. Apparently he was trying to show off his magic; an odd way to do so but you digress. A red haired boy chased after him, along with a boy with glasses.
Their magic was strange, coming out of a jeweled pen of all things.
Wind magic was casted, similar to your own Aero spells. Water attacks were aimed at it, easily dousing the blue flames. It was honestly amazing, watching so much magic come out of a tiny pen.
The redhead stopped in front of the cat, pointing his pen at him with narrowed eyes. Your own widened as he shouted a curse.
Off with your head.
That sounded awfully familiar.
Crowley was going to kick you out.
The magic mirror- or rather the dark mirror- explained that you didn't have a home to go to. You guessed it was because Destiny Islands was a whole other world, and simple mirror travel wouldn't be able to reach that far.
No matter, you could simply contact Donald or Riku on your Gummi phone and go home.
But of course, the first time a phone specifically made to communicate between worlds doesn't work is when you need it most.
So you did the only thing you could.
And showed him your Keyblade.
He muttered something to himself, widened eyes never leaving the blade in your hand. His feathers ruffled in surprise and intrigue, the slight curl of them being… strange. 
It was as if they were smiling.
Your eyes flickered to his own- noticing his scary… intense gaze.
You didn’t dare break contact, being far too focused on those piercings eyes. 
Those haunting, golden eyes. 
Eyes that looked just like Xehanorts.
The Headmage led you to a rundown cabin, home to a variety of ghosts and cobwebs. The building reminded you of the ones in Halloween Town; rundown with mischievous creatures inhabiting the spaces. These ghosts just looked like marshmallows.
You let out a low sigh, allowing yourself to fall on the dusted couch in the lounge. Debris flew up under your weight, flying into the air before dissapting. Your gaze was focused on the ceiling above, dazed as rain droplets fell to your cheeks and the wooden floors below.
The building was silent, aside from the rain. Wind blew against cobwebs, flying past your face and sticking to the rotting wood. Splinters and jagged pieces spiked up, parts of the walls ripped apart from age and student endeavors.
It was lonely here.
You didn't have anyone in this world.
Not even Jiminy fucking Cricket.
You hadn’t been alone in a long time.
The door creaked open, "Myah- it's really pouring out there!"
...
Twisted Wonderland.
That's what this place was called.
A world very befitting for its name.
Everything about this world was off— or at least— Night Raven College was.
Students seemed to love and adore the beings you had tried so desperately to keep away. They had dorms dedicated to them, embracing their darkness and allowing themselves to fall under its curse. Darkness that you had to get rid of.
Of course, they didn't actually know about the dangers you faced, finding these villians to be great and kind. They didn't know of the death and tragedy caused- the mistakes you had to fix.
It was strange though. Worlds weren't supposed to know of one another, otherwise chaos could ensue.
So why was Twisted Wonderland a combination of them all?
You suppose that's how this place got its name.
Everything in this world was twisted. Villians were considered heroic; great and all mighty beings that you and Sora definitely didn't beat.
While in the botanical gardens you sometimes laugh, imagining Leona's face if you told him you helped kill Scar. He gives you weird looks, telling you to shut up and go back to sleep. You try. It doesn’t work.
It wasn't until the Riddle incident did you realize why you were sent to this world. Darkness and hatred had been accumulating in the corners of this realm, seeping into the depths of people's hearts.
It was at times like this that made you miss Sora.
You turned over on your bed, eyes focused on the ceiling above. Moonlight seeped in through the wooden cracks, bits of the glowing celestial body peeking in. It was almost speaking to you, luring you towards it with the promise of comfort.
Kingdom Hearts.
Your eyes shut, turning away from the beckoning moon.
Well whatever. You had another long day ahead of you.
Thoughts? This was just a quick wip that I made in like an hour lolll. I’m thinking of doing another part tho, where we dive into character interactions and such. Rlly wanna write for Silver and a KH! MC!
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q1ngqve · 7 months
Note
Miss Lan Miss Lan... Gambling against Aventurine, stakes being a little pocket change (for him at least, I need credits to level up my chars T_T). While he's letting you win, in walks Veritas.
Aventurine gets serious and oh boy did the stakes just go higher...and you? You aren't even a part of the game now, you're the reward. A reward for recklessness and luck... Who do you think wins or... who do you want to win (and take you over to their room leaving the loser seething)
-🌺
omg omg i would say both are coming to my room with me hehe what's better than having sex with one hot man? having sex with two hot men!!!!!
but okay okay let's say we pick aventurine to win, he'd be so so smug about it! he'd pull you up from your seat and into his arms, wrapping his arms around your waist from behind as he smirks at a fuming dr ratio <3 i can also see him not taking this to the bedroom, instead opting for kissing you so hard your knees go weak and have to lean on the table for support, and then he'd take this chance to plop you on the table and stand between your legs to make out with you right then and there
and if you pick dr ratio to win, this man will literally throw you over his shoulder, hand on your ass as he walks out the casino, not even sparing aventurine a single glance, knowing this pisses him off even more than any words could 🤭ྀིྀིྀིྀིྀི
what about both then? they'd fuck you on the spot ahhh!!!!!! banters over who gets your ass or pussy! so so much praises / degradation from both men :( manhandling!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
"c'mon doll, you can do this."
"look at you, taking us so well."
"filthy little thing, you like being treated like our personal fuck toy, don't you?"
"whining doesn't tell us what you want, use that pretty mouth of yours."
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moyazaika · 2 days
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omg doe brought up this AMAZINGGG idea abt the crime lord yan and his lawyer darling hello hey hi!!!!!!
this kinda got away from me because it is 3am but i nEEEEEDED to get this out bjsjsjjs i blame @carnivorousyandeere
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i know i wrote the initial dynamic for his darling to be his lawyer, in that they’re on his side in court to keep him from getting sent to prison BUT BUT BUT hear me out T_T
lawyer darling who put yan kingpin away.
as in ,, you are the reason he was found guilty. you are the one, when the judge announced the final verdict, that his gaze turned to and that he smiled for, then. sentenced to death, before it was appealed to multiple life sentences; the beginning of the end of his empire.
you, you, you — the cause of his downfall.
after the infamous internationally documented case, your career soars to unprecedented heights. you’re the lawyer on every newspaper in every country, all the tv channels and glossy magazines. every law school wants you to speak at their graduation ceremonies. every firm’s reaching out to you. the whole world knows your name; you have everything!
—so why do you keep going back to the man who now has nothing?
the kingpin looks the same as he did that fateful day in court. only now, there’s bags under his eyes, and a five o clock shadow on his jaw; lips still curled in an easygoing smile. he laughs when he sees you, as if the two of you were merely old friends who hadn’t caught up in a while.
as if you’re not visiting him years later in the city’s most high security prison.
he grins. “come to gloat, have ‘ya?”
“you’ve committed countless crimes.” you state. “stolen lives and livelihoods. broken up families. killed good men. and still, all these years later, no remorse?”
“don’t get ‘yer panties in a twist,” he huffs, lazily leans back in the rickety prison chair so that he’s swinging it back and forth on its back legs, like a child. how absurd that even the garish orange uniform of a prison should suit him, “comes with the job description, don’t it?”
“i think about you,” you admit, eyeing the chains that bind his handcuffed hands to the desk in front of him. you look up, meet his gaze through the thick, dirty pane that separates you from him. keeps you safe. out of his reach, if only just.
a low whistle. “you sure know how to make a man feel special, y’know. been followin’ your cases. never put another one like me away, did ‘ya?” he grins. “i like that i’m special. makes me feel all warm ‘nd fuzzy inside.”
“wow,” you let out. “you really have gone insane.”
“always been a ‘lil crazy! like i said, part of the job description. though i’ve been thinkin’ recently,” he starts.
your fascination prompts you to lean closer. a sort of morbid curiosity that yearns to solve the puzzle of his twisted mind, slot the pieces you’ve already got in a way that makes them fit. you’ve got this weird feeling that you’re missing something. a big piece, maybe. one of the central ones.
“thinking about what?” your voice is barely above a whisper, almost conspiratorial. he leans in, too, all wide eyes—
—and then he jerks forward with the chains around the cuffs on his wrists pulled taut as he suddenly yanks them all the way, like a feral dog pulling on its leash. he looks like one, too, with that glint in his eyes.
“fuck!”
you barely even register that you’re on the floor until he laughs, low in his throat. he makes a vague gesture to your chair, toppled over on its side.
“oops.” he says, coyly. “didn’t mean to scare ‘ya.”
“liar,” you hiss, standing up to dust yourself off. this was stupid. why would you even entertain the idea of a civil conversation with a madman?
he gasps dramatically. “this is slander, your honour!”
“i’m leaving,” you scoff. “i don’t even know why i even came down here. you’re clearly fucking crazy.”
“and you’re no fun!” he pouts. “how ‘bout you stay just a little longer and i’ll make it worth ‘yer time, pretty please?”
“no can do,” you turn on your heels and reach for the door, fingers curled around the handle as you spare him one final glance over your shoulder— “have fun rotting in here for the rest of your life, psycho.”
—except the door won’t open. you try again, and again once more. the handle won’t budge. an awful sense of urgency overcomes you as you desperately shake the handle in a futile attempt to get it to just—
“funny ‘yer calling me crazy, ‘cus einstein once said real insanity is doin’ the same thing,” he beams. “over and over and over and over again, and expecting different results. door’s locked, lovely. ‘yer not getting out from there, ‘m afraid.”
you turn back then, still holding onto that door like a lifeline. he’s standing up, rubbing sore wrists that are, you realise with a sinking feeling, no longer bound by the handcuffs that kept him chained; on a short leash, like a good dog.
“what are you doing…?” your voice shakes, and it’s a far cry to the headstrong, unwavering lawyer who put the world’s most notorious criminal behind bars. “what the fuck—”
“i told you i’d make it worth your while t’stay,” he rolls up his sleeves, before pushing all of his hair (longer and greasier than the last you saw him) out of his face, features set in a determination you’ve never glimpsed before. familiar eyes twinkle with mischief. “and i meant it, y’know. the world’s very best lawyer came so far to see me! least i can do is greet ‘em properly.”
“‘cus see, the other prisoners wouldn’t be so nice. but i’ve been thinkin’ about you too.” he pulls his arm back and his fist comes flying at the pane. “don’t wanna have a conversation or nothin’ like that, nah, we talked enough.”
“you’ve been thinking about me, i’ve been waiting around for you…” bloody knuckles against cracks in the one barrier that is keeping you safe from him. you watch, helpless, as it threatens to break beneath the brute force of his trained fists.
“now let me just come over there,” he pulls his arm back again, ready to strike; knuckles raw and red, like the maniacal grin carved onto his pretty, flushed face. a deep blush and a shaky smile as those fists bring it all crashing down. “and show you how much i missed my faaavourite lawyer in the whole wide world.”
“—that be a good enough reason to stick around?” he asks slyly, before catching himself. “oh, silly me.” he shakes his head, apologetically, as he steps over broken shards on the floor, tainted with his blood. “doesn’t matter what ‘ya say.” a low hum when scarred hands reach out for you. “i waited so long for you…”
“… so, let’s make up reaaalllll good for all that lost time, okay?”
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dumpywrites · 2 months
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So What if We - Kim Namjoon / RM
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Prompt: “This wouldn’t change our friendship, right?”
Prompt request: HERE
Genre/tags: Slight angst, friends to lovers, minor mentions of smut
Pairing: Namjoon x she/her reader
a/n: I've been into friends to lovers trope lately and keep prioritizing the stories w/ this theme. I'm not neglecting the other requests I swear! haha this also turns out more sweet rather than angsty, it seems like I'm quite a bad angst writer T_T
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“This wouldn’t change our friendship, right?”
That was what the guy said to you, the morning after waking up next to you in your very own bed. His eyes were a bit droopy but he had a smile smeared on his lips. His two layers of top were tossed somewhere on the bedroom floor, messily, and his jeans were hanging loosely on the edge of the bed. You thanked the heavens that he somehow had his boxers on with him.
Both of you were drunk the night before. You knew it was a bad idea to bring alcohol to the mix when you vent to your best friend. Nevertheless, you did it anyway and the damage had been done.
Being friends with Namjoon came because of the convenient at first. While it was true that both of you came from the same circle of friends, you were never that close at the beginning. After switching job and finding out his apartment was actually near your new workplace, he would often ask you to eat dinner together after work, knowing your tendencies to forget and skip meals after work.
And that was how you grew closer. Noticing how cute his dimples were and how caring he was towards you came naturally after that. He was a gentleman. The small things he did when you were with your friends suddenly felt a little more special. Before, you would never bat an eye when he helped you on the most basic things, like pulling Taehyung’s dinner chair, just because of how heavy they were. He would always do that before, but lately, your heart did a little flip when he did the gesture. 
It started to worry you as day by day you began to see him romantically rather than how you’d view the rest of your friends. Safe to say getting pissed drunk with just the two of you comprehensibly was a bad idea. 
It started when both of you were on your fifth can of sparkling rum, the tv was playing baby shark, you could not care less of what was playing at that point, alongside the scattered conversation cards on the floor. 
You could barely read the question card in your hand, but Namjoon was quick to read his. 
“Why did you break up with your most recent ex?”
You frowned. “That’s not fair, how come your last question was about what do you miss in your childhood but I got this?!”
“Just answer it!” He laughed. 
“I don’t know. It’s been a year I don’t even wanna remember.” You shrugged.
“It’s been that long?” 
“Yeah.” You chuckled. “Can’t believe it’s been a year since last time I got laid.” 
He looked at you with widened eyes due to the unbelievable sentence that just came out from your mouth. The alcohol truly was making you lose your filter. 
“You haven’t got laid in a year???” 
“Stop, don’t say it like that!” You whined. “So what if I don’t do casual hookups?”
“True but…” He squinted his eyes, trying to get a better look at you. “I just can’t believe it cause you’re hot.”
You eyed him questioningly, squinting in a cartoonish behavior. 
“I have eyes.”
“So do I, duh.” 
“Just take a compliment, please.” He rolled his eyes.
Both of you were sitting on the sofa with shoulders touching each other. Your head was getting heavy and his voice started to sound like honey, buttering your ears, making your mind dizzy. Furthermore, you did not know since when did he has his hand over your left thigh, just sitting there doing nothing. 
“Don’t you get horny sometimes?” He asked again, followed by a light grin. 
“Obviously.” You laughed bitterly. “Why? You’re offering help or something?” 
It was a bold thing to say, but before you knew it, somehow you were manhandled into his lap and your lips met in a rough and hungry kiss. Honestly you did not know how many minutes passed of both you just tongue dancing with each other. He broke the kiss only to ask you a question. 
“Do you mind if I touch your boobs?”
You almost laughed, but quickly nodded anyway. The rest was history, which brought you to the first problem. Your best friend waking up almost fully naked next to you, asking you a question that sounded so vile in your ears. 
“This wouldn’t change our friendship, right?”
“Yeah… I guess so.” 
“I don’t wanna make you feel uncomfortable or anything—“
“No! I swear I’m not…” You quickly interrupted. 
“I did wear…”
“You did.” You chuckled. “It was a good thing I had some in my bedside.” 
“Okay.” He laughed nervously. “You sure you’re alright, though?”
“I mean… shit happens, I guess?” 
“I guess you’re right.” 
You were in fact a big fat liar. Things quickly went downhill right after. If it wasn’t that obvious to you then, it was now. You had feelings for Namjoon and it was even harder when he would still ask you to eat dinner with him after work. He acted like nothing had ever happened between you, and so did you. You endured and buried whatever feelings you had, for the sake of not wanting to lose him. 
Watching him acting normally when your friends were around while here you were, trying your best not to break your character. 
**
“Jin!” You exclaimed, hugging the guy. 
“Come on, everyone’s drinking already!”
Of course you were late, you were considering the option of not even showing up at all. It was getting harder trying to compose yourself while Namjoon was right there with all of your friends. 
“Why is Yoongi dancing?” You looked at the chaos in front of you. 
“I told you, they’re already drinking.” Jin laughed. “Here, take this.” The guy handed you a cup. 
You cringed upon bringing the cup closer to your nose. “Is this Jungkook’s whiskey cola?! That guy mixes like one percent of cola to his whiskey. I’m not drinking this.”
“You could always spend the night.” The older guy replied as he shrugged at you with a grin on his handsome face. 
“I’m not sleeping on your couch.” You laughed, bringing the untouched cup with you anyway. 
“You’re here!”
You gulped. Of course he had to greet you all excited. You wanted so badly to wipe that stupid smile off his face, but you couldn’t. You had to put on this whole best friend act. Just a little longer.
He looked casual and boyish. The plain army green oversized tee matched with his cream colored bermuda shorts. Ever since he decided to bleach his hair you couldn’t manage more than three seconds looking at his face. It was just a silly thing he did when he was bored, but boy oh boy did he look hot.
Managing a smile, you hoped he didn’t notice the few seconds of silence you took. 
“Come here!!!” Yoongi shouted at you with a silly smile on his face. Man was clearly drunk out of his mind. 
“Who’s responsible for this?” You felt bad but couldn’t help but to laugh slightly at the sight. 
“Let him be, dude’s heartbroken.” Taehyung bit his inner cheek as he told you. 
“Poor Yoongi.” You cooed. 
“Joon though, on the other hand…” Taehyung continued, whispering to your side. “My guy looks like he’s in love.”
Your body jumped internally. “He is?”
“You don’t know? I thought you guys hangout together a lot lately.”
“Well, yeah but… he’s never really mentioned anything in that topic actually.” 
“Weird.” Taehyung hummed. “Cause he’s totally acting like he’s in love with someone right now.” 
“He acts the same.” You replied. Secretly you prayed that your friend would not notice the annoyed tone in your voice. 
“He’s been writing love songs, are you kidding me?!” The guy next to you laughed. 
“So? Love songs sell.” You rolled your eyes. 
“Bro, I saw this part of the lyrics where he talk about a girl riding him! It’s insane!” Taehyung beamed. 
A flush of heat came through you and you cleared your throat, regaining your composure. “That’s none of my business.” 
“Ah, I get it now. You’re jealous.” The lad smirked and nodded his head at you. 
“Now what kind of conspiracy theory is this?!” You tried to laugh it off. 
“I mean, yeah he doesn’t normally go for girls that look like you.”
“That’s offensive.” 
“No, I mean in a good way. He dates the most boring and basic looking pretty girls.”
“I was feeling great until you drop the word “pretty” at the end.” You eyed the guy. 
“He doesn’t join our online gaming nights anymore.” 
“And?” 
“Since he started hanging out with you.”
The statement made you stop. Taehyung’s words had you contemplating. Some nights you would give Namjoon a call when you were just simply tired, wanting to hear the comfort of his voice. Listening to his random rambles and yaps were enough to ease the burnt out from work. Could it be? Was talking to you important enough to make him skip gaming with his friends? You hoped it wasn’t just a silly thought. 
“Hello?” Taehyung waved at you. “Back from delulu world, yet?”
“Shut up.”
“Suit yourself.” Taehyung snickered before leaving you to join the others doing karaoke session. 
You could only shook your head in amusement. After being friends with them for years, the sight of the guys being goofy was definitely not something new to you. Spotting the empty dining table, you chose to sit on the chair, watching them from afar. 
That was until a certain someone approached you. 
“What are you guys talking about?” Speak of the devil. 
You forced a grin. “You know Taehyung and his silly rambles.” 
“You’re not gonna join us?” 
“Nah, I don’t feel like drinking today.” Funnily, the cup of drink was still in your hand. You swirled the liquid and stared at it. 
“What’s bothering you?” He asked while taking the empty chair next to you. 
“Just don’t wanna drink today, that’s all?” 
“Wanna go get some fresh air?” He looked at you with a sly smile. 
“We can???” You looked at him with wide eyes. “Where?”
“Jin’s bedroom balcony. We just have to be very quiet though so they don’t notice us going upstairs.” He chuckled. 
“You’re crazy. This is some type of shit that will get slippers thrown at us!” 
“He’s already on his new cup.” Namjoon said, bringing your attention to the older guy taking a fill of his drink. “He won’t notice.”
The smile on his face was making it hard for you to refuse the offer. Sighing, you put the plastic cup down on the table and stood up. 
“Fine, but if anything happens, I’m blaming it fully on you.”
“Whatever you say, princess.” He laughed and stood up as well. 
Oh if only he knew the effect he had on you, just casually calling you with that nickname. 
Both of you tiptoed upstairs, giggling like a couple of high schoolers sneaking out. You let him open Jin’s room and closed the door behind. As soon as you both make it to the balcony, you saw him shuffling his hand through his back pocket. 
“Do you mind if I smoke?”
“Uh, no. Go ahead.” 
“Thanks.” He said before lighting one on his lips. 
You just stood there, unknowingly admiring him huffing and puffing smoke to the opposite direction from you. 
“Still don’t wanna tell me what’s inside your pretty little head?” He looked at you with a grin. 
“What’s with the compliments today?” You raised one of your eyebrows at him. 
“It’s probably the alcohol.” He chuckled. 
“Wow, so you need to be drunk to say that I look good?!” You folded your arms.
“I’d say it made me more honest… but believe what you wanna believe.” He looked to your direction, making your heart jumped. 
You cleared your throat. “Joon, I uh… I kinda need to tell you something.” 
“What is it?” 
Whatever the hell that happened between us, changed me. I wasn’t okay with just being friends. I have feelings for you. 
“You look like the baby from Ice Age movie.”
“Fucking hell.” He groaned as you bursted out laughing. 
It was for the best. He did not need to know. You would outgrow this abnormal phase.
The whole world stopped when he suddenly tucked your hair behind your ears. You froze, looking at him, searching for his eyes. There was that smile again. 
“It’s windy.” 
“Y-Yeah.” You stuttered. 
“This might sound crazy but can I kiss you?”
You widened your eyes and stepped back a bit. “You’re drunk.”
“Maybe if you…“ He groaned, squeezing his cigarette bud and tossing it. “Fuck it.”
“Huh—“
Your words were quickly cut by his lips on yours. Your mind went blank in an instant. What? Why? Whom? What was even happening you did not know anymore. All you knew was his lips moving softly against yours and the only thing that was filling up your brain was to do the same thing to him. You could taste the slight bitter taste of his cigarette, mixed with whatever fruity drink he had before, the one the boys clearly had drank all before you came since you were left with Jungkook’s abomination whiskey. 
You didn’t know how long were both of you lip locking with each other before you felt his hands started to travel, feeling up your body. You hummed on his lips and felt his breath hitched. Things seemed wrong but you couldn’t bring yourself to stop it. How could you? When this was all you wanted all along?
“Joon… I…” 
You tried to protest, but he quickly captured your lips again. This time more hungrily, almost feral. You swore you felt his hands grab your butt, massaging them softly. You flinched, a low yelp escaped your lips. 
Then he suddenly stopped. 
“Jesus, I’m so sorry.” He palmed his face. “I didn’t mean— Shit, you’re gonna hate me…”
“It’s okay, you’re just drunk…” 
“I’m not drunk.” He stopped you. “I have feelings for you.”
Now that’s a surprise. 
“You have feelings… for me?”
“Should’ve told you sooner, but I chickened out.” He smiled to himself. 
“You asked me if things wouldn’t change after that night…” You looked away, biting your lips. 
“I was panicking. I thought you’d hate me.”
“Well I don’t.” You huffed. “Clearly, I’m still here. I somehow managed to maintain my sanity while trying my best not to let things change between us. Just like how you wanted…” You didn’t realize some tears were already escaping your eyes. 
“Hey, don’t cry.” He grabbed your wrist and pulled you into a hug, which frankly, only made the crying worse. 
“You’re dumb.” You pulled away slightly, just to see his face. “But I have feelings for you too.”
You both laughed in unison and he pulled you back in his embrace, hugging you tighter. “I’m sorry.”
“You better be.”
“OH MY GOD!!!” 
You both turned your heads to Jin’s voice yelling from a near distance. In a flash you let go of each other. You looked at Namjoon and he only shrugged with a disappointed smile. 
“Who told you fuckers can enter my room so freely, huh?!” Jin yelled. 
“We thought you were drunk enough to not care.” You replied. 
“Well thanks to Yoongi turning our karaoke session into a crying fest, I had to wrap things up. Then I realize the two of you are missing.” He rolled his eyes. 
“I’m sorry, it was all me. I needed a quick smoke and I dragged her along.” Namjoon laughed, clearly not taking the older guy seriously. 
“Whatever.” Jin turned his back. “Just fuck off for now, my head hurts and I need to sleep.”
“Yes, sir.” Joon replied. 
“Go sleep somewhere.” The lean guy shooed. “And don’t you dare have sex in my house.”
“We didn’t—“ 
“Zip it.” Jin pointed at you. “Go before I throw my expensive Louis Vuitton slides at both of you.”
The two of you quickly made an exit. As soon as the door closed, the thick awkward atmosphere surrounded you. 
“You’re staying here for the night?” He asked. 
“Don’t know.” You looked around. “Are you?”
“Wanna… go back to my place? It’s just a ten minute walk.” He said sheepishly. “And uh, do things correctly this time?”
A giddy smile formed on your lips as you let him take your hands in his.
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Thank you for reading! ⛅️
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