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#why does dealing with anything human stress me out so much
confetti-critter · 1 month
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I'm mad at myself that I didnt end up telling the person looking at my ear about my concerns about taking too many pain pills, and didn't ask questions about anything really. That always happens, I never feel 100% satisfied when I visit someplace medical. Theres always a huge chunk of Care missing. They rush and I feel like a bother.
I hate to say it but if I didn't have my mum with me I'd be useless. I wouldn't have even gone because there would be too many unknown factors in the situation. Shoulda taken her with me while getting looked at, but theres shame involved with almost being 30 and not being able to advocate for myself.
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flamingpudding · 16 days
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I had a crack idea that I was thinking of so you know in Dan is Klarion au I was imagining a au based off of that one where all of Danny's children are Klarion is like the robin thing for Batman it started off with Danielle when nabu insulted Danny as the Ghost King and Balance
Ever since Ellie decided that she needed to get back in blood so she made the chaotic antihero Klarion and and her suppose it familiar 'cat' Teekl the way to help out her mother and mess with Dr Fate/Nabu Teekl is actually a bear with an illusion on that makes him look like a cat in the human's eyes
Whatever since the anti-hero Klarion in The Phantom family has been passed down each of them giving their own flair to the persona of Klarion with a different animal every time that they had pretending to be a cat
Tell her to finally passed on to Dan it is an honorary sibling thing each of them has their own antihero name once they passed down the title of Klarion
Diana's query and takes after his father's style of dressing and his tickle is a phoenix
First of Thanks for the Ask! Inspirational as always! Helps with my writers block [insert awkward laugh]
Either way because this is split in two asks... you get two version! One focused on how it started and the other on the reveal! Though the might be some little Shorts... Also there is something really funny to me about a giant bear letting Illusionen into a cat... So Enjoy!
(BTW still thinking over the other ask... and working on it don't worry!)
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Ellie huffed as Danny reprimanded her for her actions. She just huffed crossing her arms. She was just helping Danny. Her mom got a lot on his shoulders and she as the sort of oldest saw that the best. Sure technically Dan was older then her but, he shrunk down to kid level again and now she was the oldest.
Well if she ignored her other brothers but they were only saved recently and still in treatment with Frostbite. So she was the oldest. End of story.
"Ellie you can't just go off like that you know that messing with an Ancient is not-"
"Mom, That Nabu-Guy was being a pain in the a- " - "Ellie!" - "A PAIN, babbling on to much about Order here Order there. How keeping Balance means keeping Order and bla bla bla!" She cut in stopping her mom before he could go on another rant about the Ancients, she needed to treat with respect.
"He doesn't respect you, the Ancient of Balance! You are the literal Symbol of Balance between Life and Death! Aside from being the Ghost King. So of course I had to mess with the one HE mentors!" Ellie added huffing as she crossed her arms.
Danny pinched the bridge of his nose. "Ellie, you created an entire alternate persona!"
"Yea so?"
"You used an illusion spell on Fluffels!"
"And? Any good Anit-Hero needs a Mascot." Ellie shrugged once more looking up at her mom before looking over to Fluffels, her pet ghost grizzly that was pretty much double maybe even tripple her size and the fluffiest ghost grizzly you could find in the entire Ghost Zone, and the cutest.
Danny on the other hand groaned, wondering if he had done anything wrong while raising Danielle. Sure he had been a teen himself but good damit why the hell did Ellie decided messing with the Ancient of Order or rather his mentee was a good idea. "I am calling Jazz! You can explain to her what you were thinking!"
He was definitely to overworked and stressed to deal with Ellies mischievousness right now. Well she did call her alternate persona Klarion, Lord of Chaos. Nope! He was not dealing with this right now, so Danny did the sanest thing he could think of. Turning on his heel and walking away. Where to? Who cares maybe he would check in with his old man Clockwork and see what Ellie had actually been up to, instead of just reading through Nabu's complains.
Ellie on the other hand blinked watching her mom leave before calling after him. "Does that mean I have to stop, being Klarion?"
"Mom?!"
"MOM!"
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"Well hello my lovely Amadillos! Long time not seen!"
Ellie shouted cheerfully as she twirled into appearing hair styled into a horn like form, black suit and she might have over done it a little with the black eyeliner but hey it was an iconic look wasn't it. She smirked as Fluffles growled which translated into a meow for the mortals before her thank to the illusion spell.
The mortal teen looked up at her surprised as she floated down her hand glowing with red ectoplasm (a color change from her usual green ectoplasm that had taken a while to learn from Pandora). Young Justice was currently transporting something of interest to her. Well of Interest for the Justice League, really but Doctor Fate was involved which meant Nabu was involved, which naturally meant she would get involved. It didn't hurt that she would also get to try to try some new tricks.
"You got something interesting there... and I want that." She grinned. Ellie didn't give them long before she acted using the new tricks she had learned.
"Woah! Hey there, watch the pointy and sharp thowies!" She laughed making a quick shield as she blocked some batarangs and arrows before blinking.
"Hey they look different. Robin, did you change equipment? Did you get a new haircut too?" She asked curious but didn't really receive an answer as they ignored her questions and shouted something about distracting her while the others continue the transportation. Still she bend down to pick one of them up twirling it between her fingers. "What gives didn't they have a different design before?"
In hindsight it was probably not a good idea to just abandon her original goal but Robin was making her curious. And she could always find a different way to mess with Nabu. Her mom had given her an indirect okay years ago anyway.
"Teekl!" She called out and only her eyes could see how Fluffles jumped at the call growling in response as he swatted away some of the more annoying Young Justice kids. To the mortals it probably looked like Teekl was using ectoplasm, or well magic, in their eyes.
She used that change to go up into Robins face smirking widely as she looked at the other more closely, trying to get a read on him. "You are different! You aren't the same Robin I meet before!"
She ducked in time avoid Superboy as she hopped back excited with a new idea for her family.
But first she would have to deal with the little chaos and mischief she was creating.
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".....and that is how I learned that the Robin title is getting passed down. So I was thinking of doing the same!" Ellie broadly stated looking at all her younger siblings before her. "We all get pretty annoyed with the way Nabu treats Mom so there always has to be a Lord of Chaos to 'balance' Nabu out!"
She grinned at her siblings expecting the same kind of excitement she had and they didn't disappoint. Danny had been there for all of them, even going so far as in to find a way with Clockwork to save some of their lives. So of course they all would jump at the change to mess with the one Ancient that was badmouthing their Mother just because Balance didn't entitle Order the way they wanted.
After all Chaos was needed to Balance Order out.
This was going to be fun...
[Follow up part Linked here]
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shmaptainwrites · 24 days
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𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑 [𝐉𝐀𝐌𝐄𝐒 𝐖𝐈𝐋𝐒𝐎𝐍]
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PAIRINGS — James Wilson x fem!Reader
SUMMARY — It was never Reader's plan to be a single mother to a newborn child, but a longtime friend steps in and before long they both have the family they've always wanted, the only catch: they're still just friends
WORD COUNT — 13.6K
WARNINGS — mentions of pregnancy and birth, breastfeeding (like non descriptive? does this need to be a warning?)
NOTE — Okay this fic has been in the works for a while and I have been swamped with school so I'm so happy I'm finally able to post something because it's literally been a full-ass month since I last came out with anything ._. hoping once finals are over I can get back into my writing groove and give some of my ideas the attention they deserve!
Middle photo credit goes to @shots-of-wilson-and-whiskey
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“Are you sure this is okay?” you looked back while holding a baby carrier in both hands. 
“Like I told you back at the hospital, and in the car, and then again in the car, I promise this is okay,” James assured you, following right behind, bags under each arm. “You just went through a 40 hour labour, did you really think it would be a smart move to come home alone?”
He was right about that, physically you were exhausted, you were sure how much longer you could keep your eyes open. 
“Go take a shower, I’ll look after her until you get out,” he suggested. “If you had a support person here you would have taken shifts.”
“I know, but you have a life James,” you sighed. “One that didn’t involve your friend getting pregnant and then taking care of her.”
“Would it make it any better if I told you I really don’t mind? I like spending time with you, it’s why we’ve been friends for so long,” he put the bags down by the table and then placed a hand on your shoulder. 
“James, I love you, but I’m going to be brutally honest because my filter has vanished. This is what happens to all your wives, all your girlfriends. I really don’t need that happening to us too,” you said. 
“It won’t,” he pressed. “Come on, just take the shower. I know you want to.”
You sighed, “Alright, but I’m not gonna call for you to come in the middle of the night and every which time of day. If you want to come and see us, do it of your own accord and if you don’t want to then don’t,” you emphasized. “Do what you want, not what you think I want.”
“If I say I will, will you go take a shower?” James asked and you rolled your eyes at him. 
“Don’t drop my baby while I’m in there, okay?” you pointed at him. “You still owe me for that vase you broke.” 
“You mean the tacky one your crappy ex-boyfriend’s mom gave you? I think I did you a favour there.” 
“You’re insufferable sometimes, you know?” you said carefully putting the carrier down in the living room and looking down at your resting daughter for a moment before heading towards your room. 
“I love you too,” he said simply, replacing you by her side and keeping a close eye on her while she slept. 
You had to admit, it was a relief to be able to step into the shower, knowing there was someone you trusted outside looking after the small human you were now fully responsible for. At least before dealing with the stress and everything that would come afterwards you’d be able to be clean. 
When you came out of your bedroom after your shower, dressed in the most comfortable clothes you could find lying around, you saw James in the kitchen, the carrier now propped up on the table while he unpacked something from some grocery bags. 
“I was craving Indian, do you want some?” he asked. 
“Of course I do, the food at your hospital sucks, hand it over,” you put your hand out and he gave you a bowl so you could serve yourself some rice and curry. “She’s still asleep?” 
“Woke up once, but I got her to fall back asleep pretty easily. She might get hungry soon though too.” 
“So I should eat while I still have the chance,” you sat down at the island and began munching on the food, turning around the carrier so you could see your daughter. 
It was interesting, she’d been around only for a short few days but you could barely ever take your eyes off her. 
“Did you pick a name for her yet?” James asked, leaning over the table and eating his portion of dinner. 
“I think so,” you nodded. “I was between two when she was born, but now that I look at her she fits one better than the other.” 
“So what’s the winner?” 
“Liana,” you smiled and brushed your fingers along her small curled toes. “It suits her doesn’t it?” 
“I think it does,” he nodded. “You made a pretty cute baby.” 
“I made a very cute baby, thank you very much,” you scoffed with a chuckle. “You think you could do better?” 
“Well I don’t have a uterus so I don’t think we’ll ever be able to find out,” he shook his head. “Shame, I probably would have demolished you.” 
“As if,” you laughed, continuing to eat more food just as Liana began to stir awake. “And there’s my cue.” 
You stood up and carefully took her out of the carrier, cautious of supporting her neck before moving over to the couch where you could comfortably feed her. 
“Once you’re done I’ll burp her,” James said. “So you can keep eating.” 
“Sure,” you nodded. “Got practice from your med school days?” 
“Yeah, actually,” he nodded. “I thought originally I might specialize in working in the NICU so I spent a lot of time in the maternity ward.” 
“What made you change your mind?” you asked. 
“I would have burnt out,” he admitted. “Seeing babies and spending time with them is one thing, but seeing them sick and sometimes not get better? It’s a lot harder than you’d imagine.” 
You hummed thoughtfully, “You would have been good in that department if you decided to go that route. I think at least.” 
“Really, why do you think so?” 
“James, you’ve always been great with kids and parents. Don’t you remember how we met?” 
He chuckled to himself, “Summer camp days. Yeah, you really did have to know your way around both.” 
“You somehow managed, as a nineteen-year-old, to calm a child who was freaking out about staying away from home and dealing with an unhappy parent of a different child. I think your people skills just got better as you got older.” 
“I don’t think there’s much in life that trains you to deal with crises as much as being a camp counsellor.” 
“You can test your skills with Liana and see if you’ve still got the magic when it comes to babies,” you teased, followed by a yawn. 
“Trust me, I definitely do,” he assured you. “Babies love me.”
“And do you love babies?”
“I do, and I think I’m gonna end up loving yours a little more than most,” he admitted. 
“Good, she’s gonna need it,” you sighed. “I’m gonna need it.”
There was a pause for a moment before James spoke up again,
“Have you talked to him since the break up?” he asked and you shook your head, feeling the tears develop in your eyes. 
“I don’t really want to talk about it, not right now,” you whispered, looking down at Liana again. 
James did not peg your boyfriend as the abandoning type, but after he had coaxed the news out of you during one of your visits, he could see how much it crushed you to think of what lied ahead. Not because you didn’t want a child, but because Liana was all you wanted and you thought you were on the same page as your partner, but when it came down to things he couldn’t hold up the mask he’d been wearing any longer. 
“You should talk about it sometime though, right?” James said softly. “Doesn’t have to be with me, but you’ve been so laser focused on getting through the past nine months you haven’t really processed what happened.”
Liana had since finished feeding and you carried her over to the kitchen island, passing James a burp cloth that he could drape across his shoulder before taking her from your hands, after you pressed a small kiss to her forehead. 
“Not sure if I want to process it,” you admitted. “I’d rather focus on her.”
“And I’d rather you take care of yourself so you don’t crash and burn,” he said. 
You knew he was right, but it was nicer to pretend you were alone from start to finish than even imagining the possibility that someone was supposed to be with you through everything. The doctors appointments, the morning sickness, the preparation. 
Instead you ended up feeling like a burden to your friends who had gone out of their way to help you and be there for you. 
“Okay,” you nodded simply. “I’ll do it for you and her then.”
“It’ll end up being for you in the end,” he assured. “But just…trust me on this okay?”
“I do,” you smiled. “Just like I trust you with her.”
You finished eating your dinner while James took care of Liana and even managed to get her to go back to sleep. It seemed that even though she’d only been in the world a short while, she felt just as safe in his arms as she did in yours.
“You can put her down if you want. I have a cot set up in my room,” you pointed. 
“I’m alright like this,” he shook his head. “I’ll hold her until you’re done then I’ll leave you guys so you can get some sleep.”
Considering how hungry you were, it didn't take that much longer for you to finish eating and while you cleared up the dishes, James went and put Liana down in her bed and then gathered his things so he could give you some time alone. 
“I’ll see you around, James. Thanks for coming to help today,” you gave him a big hug and he held you tight in that way he would when he wanted to say something, but knew it should probably wait. 
“Anytime,” he gave you an additional squeeze. “You’re gonna be a great mom. You are a great mom already. I’m really happy for you.” 
You couldn’t bring yourself to say any words in response so you just nodded your head and held onto him tighter. After a moment he pulled away and pressed a quick kiss to your cheek. 
“Love you, now go get some sleep.” 
“You’ve got it Dr. Wilson,” you saluted him. 
You walked him out of the door and after closing it shut behind him you took a deep breath. It was going to be hard, but you could do it. 
A few months later…
“Don’t you have a life?” you yawned, bouncing Liana in your arms to try and get her to fall asleep. 
“I mean I went bowling with House last night and I consistently stay late at work, and that’s about it, so no,” James shook his head. 
“So you figured that coming and bothering me is a good use of your spare time.” 
“I wouldn’t call it bothering,” James gave you a look. “I made you dinner.” 
“Yeah you did, and unfortunately it was really good too,” you sighed. “So you just want to hang out with me and Liana?”
“Yeah, is that so hard to believe?”
“A little considering I always have baby vomit on me now,” you chuckled. 
“It brings out your eyes,” he teased. “Here, why don’t I take her.”
“Last time I agreed to that you riled her up, which I didn’t think was possible for a three month old,” you eyed him skeptically. 
“I promise I’ll put her to sleep,” he crossed his heart. 
“Wrong religion, James,” you shook your head and he laughed. 
“Do you want me to swear on the Torah?”
“It would help,” you nodded. 
“Alright, I swear on the Torah that I won’t rile her up.”
You reluctantly passed Liana over to James and scoffed when she almost immediately stopped fussing. 
“See,” he smiled and kissed her small nose while he rocked her gently, making her eyes slowly close as she fell asleep. 
“You two are in kahoots. She’s fine whenever you’re not around, but when you are it’s like she knows she can get passed off to you if she’s fussy enough,” you laughed a little. “It’s cute though, I like how much she likes you.”
“Me too, why do you think I keep coming here?” 
“So you came to visit, what do you want to do?” you asked. “My plans were to clean the kitchen and do laundry, so not much more exciting than sitting around at home.”
“Why don’t you let me put her down then we can tackle the kitchen together. I mean I did make half of the mess there.”
“I won’t argue with you there,” you sighed and put your hands on your hips. “Okay, I’m gonna throw a load in before you put her down.” 
It took a little bit for James to be confident Liana was fully asleep before putting her down in her cot and then meeting you again in the kitchen where you were packing up leftovers from dinner. 
“Have you had many visitors?” James asked. 
“Well, I do have this one guy that keeps coming around, about this tall, practicing oncology, I think he’s a little bit obsessed with me,” you joked. 
“Aside from me,” he shook his head and went over to the dishes. 
“Yeah, a few. My parents were here for a bit while you were out of town and then some of my friends have come around to help with a few things here and there and to meet Liana.”
“Nice.”
“You sound like you want to say something,” you looked back at him. 
“It’s not too much having me over all the time, is it?”
“No, not at all,” you shook your head. “You know me, I’d tell you if it was.”
“Because I really do like spending time with you both. It’s a lot nicer than going to an empty house at the end of the day,” he admitted. “So if you don’t mind, maybe I can keep bothering you and making a mess in your kitchen.”
“I think that would be okay,” you smiled. 
You cleaned in silence for a bit before James began asking a few questions about Liana. 
“She had an appointment with her pediatrician recently, right? Everything went okay?”
“Yeah, fit as a fiddle,” you sighed. “Thank goodness.”
“Have you decided if you’re gonna use formula yet? Or will you wait it out?”
“I was actually going to ask you about this, whenever I ask anyone I think has an opinion I’d like to hear they say I need to make the decision myself and then everyone I don’t want to hear from seems to have something to say,” you chuckled. “What do you think? As a doctor?”
“I mean, if I were in your situation I might wait a bit longer, she’s still pretty young and there’s no real reason to switch over yet. I think a lot of people start maybe around 12 months and from what I’ve seen that works well,” he shrugged. 
“Thanks for giving me a straight answer,” you placed a hand on his arm. “I also don’t know if I should try and take leave from work or hire a nanny, but I think I probably have to figure that one out myself.”
“Do you have enough savings to take the time off?” he asked. 
“I get a few more months paid leave from the company I work for since I have seniority, but after that I have to figure out what to do. I think I have enough saved to last me some time, but I’m going to have to go back eventually.”
James hummed thoughtfully. 
“Do you wanna come up with solutions tonight or relax now that we’ve finished cleaning?” he asked, motioning his head to the kitchen that was definitely in better shape than before. 
“Let’s watch a movie or something, I don’t think I’ve turned the TV on since Liana was born. I’ll fold the laundry when it’s done while we watch,” you said. “I’ll figure something out later.”
“We should watch, oh jeez what’s that thing we started ages ago and never finished?”
“The really bad soap?” you asked and he nodded, “Oh yes, we’re definitely watching that.”
“Okay, you go get settled, I’m gonna make some tea, do you want some?”
“Sure, just make me whatever you’re having,” you nodded and grabbed the remote from under the pile of blankets on the couch, turning on the TV and trying to find the episodes you had recorded to watch later. 
By the time James had finished making the tea, you had found the show and were just about to start it. 
“Here,” James passed you the mug. “So what was the last thing that happened?”
“I think the main guy was sleeping with the head nurse, right and then there was the whole thing with her being engaged to the other surgeon and then her sister was in a coma?” 
“Wait, I thought the surgeon she was engaged to was sleeping with one of his patients?” 
“He was,” you nodded. “It was a whole thing.”
“Alright, just start it, I’m sure I’ll remember more as we watch.”
James was very sorely mistaken, if anything he’d gotten more confused and you were absolutely no help because nothing was making sense anymore. 
“What is up with the writing?” you asked. “Like did they just completely forget they had a whole storyline dedicated to this huge procedure and now they’re acting like nothing happened.”
“Don’t get me started, that guy was doing surgery without gloves, like that doesn’t even take much effort to get right. You’d think it was common sense,” James added. 
“Maybe we should turn it off,” you looked over at your friend, “it’s getting us all riled up.”
James pressed his lips together, “I know, but I kind of want to find out who’s the father of Paula’s baby.”
You leaned back into the couch, you had managed to fold all the laundry, and it was still a little too early to go to sleep, you supposed a few more episodes couldn’t hurt. 
“If I fall asleep, just lock up on your way out, okay?” you looked over at him and he nodded as you started the next episode. 
Just as you predicted, about halfway through the second episode you began to drift off, and as soon as James noticed, he stopped the episode already having decided you could finish it together another time. 
He shifted you slightly so you were lying down on the couch instead of in the uncomfortable position you were in before, placing a blanket over top of you. He leaned down and pressed a kiss to your cheek, wishing you a good night before going to check on Liana, and after seeing she was sleeping soundly and the baby monitor was on, he saw himself out, taking your spare key from where it was hidden on the porch and locking the door. 
“How’s my girl doing?” James grinned, scooping Liana out of your arms. “I haven’t seen you in so long,” he kissed her nose making her giggle. 
“James, you were here two days ago,” you laughed. 
“And it feels like an eternity.”
You crossed your arms over your chest, “She’s got you wrapped around her finger.”
“I don’t mind,” he shrugged. “Just as long as we get to spend time together.”
“Yeah, well she hasn’t napped yet so it can wait until after that,” you reached to take her back but James insisted he could put her to sleep. “James, you just got off work are you sure you don’t want to eat something or take a break for a bit?”
“This is like a break for me,” he assured you. 
“Okay, I’m gonna make a salad, come out and eat when you’re done.”
James nodded and went off to the bedroom so he could sit on the armchair there and coax her to sleep. 
Usually he didn’t need more than twenty minutes to half an hour to put her down, so when you were hitting the forty-five minute mark you wondered if Liana was being fussy, so you went to check in on them, instead seeing James fast asleep on the armchair with Liana snuggled against his chest. 
You bit back a big smile and went to go grab your camera quickly, and quietly snapped a shot of the two of them. 
Not wanting to wake either of them, you made your way back to the kitchen, shutting the door of the room behind you to make sure the sound didn’t travel. 
Figuring it might be a while before James came back out, you decided to eat your dinner, that way you could take Liana from him when they woke up so he could get something to eat too. 
As you had predicted, James exited the room about an hour later, Liana now awake and hungry for her own dinner. 
“Want me to take her now?” you teased and he rolled his eyes while you took your baby from him, sitting on the couch to feed her while he grabbed himself something to eat. “You had a good nap?”
“Great actually, I think I needed it. Been pulling a lot of late nights at the office getting paperwork done,” he admitted. “I’m surprised you didn’t wake me.”
“You looked comfortable, I didn’t want to bother you.”
“Well, I appreciate it cause I needed the sleep,” he sighed and came and sat next to you while he began to eat his dinner. 
“James, I…I tried to talk to him the other week,” you said, knowing he would be able to connect the dots back to your ex. “I’d been meaning to tell you, it just slipped my mind I guess.”
“You did…what did he say?”
“God, I’m gonna start crying again,” you let out a humourless chuckle and lifted a hand to wipe away the tears beginning to form in your eyes. “It doesn’t matter what he said. What matters is that it was probably good that we broke up. He wouldn’t have been a good father or husband for that matter when it came down to it.”
“I’m proud of you for reaching out anyways. It takes a lot of guts to do that after someone leaves you.”
You nodded your head, “I’m just…I know I said you should keep coming here because you want to, but I really do like having you around. It just makes it seem simpler. Easier,” you looked over at him. “You’re a good friend Jamie, I love you.”
“Love you too,” he leaned over and pressed a kiss to your forehead, watching as your attention turned back to your daughter as she finished feeding. 
You held her just like that in your arms for a little while longer, watching as she reached out for your fingers and then tried to go even further to grab James. Clearly her attention was addictive because he was ready to put his food down to help burp her, but you made a teasing remark about him hogging her and that he needed to eat his food so you’d take care of it and he could have her when he was done. 
Eventually, you traded Liana for James’ dishes and went to load the dishwasher while he kept her occupied, letting her gnaw on his tie while making all sorts of nonsensical baby noises that James took as conversation starters. 
It was funny to watch the two have what looked like a full blown conversation and you were sure James had been reading some parenting magazine or another that spoke of helping babies develop linguistic abilities. 
“Hey James,” you crossed your arms over your chest, leaning against the wall. 
“Yeah?”
“Do you want a key?”
“A key to what?” he looked at you confused. 
“The house,” you said. “I just thought since you’re here all the time you can come and go whenever you want and if you forget something and I’m out you can come get it yourself.”
“A key,” he thought about it. “This feels like a big milestone moment.”
“I mean I already have the key to your place, but that was because you refused to have anyone look after you after you got your wisdom teeth removed.”
“Wait, you have my key?” 
“Yeah, I just took yours and had it copied,” you shrugged. 
“I feel like I should be a bit more concerned about this, but I’m not.”
“It’s because you’re friends with House, you’re used to it,” you waved him off. 
“Liana, did you know your mom’s a thief?” he looked down at the baby in his arms and you rolled your eyes. 
“Do you want the key or not?” 
“I’ll take it, and I guess you can keep mine, but I’m never there anyways.”
“It’s okay, I’ll just use it if I need to steal your social insurance card to commit identity theft.”
“Liana banana, your mom’s being very silly tonight,” James picked her up and held her out in front of him before bringing her down to press a few kisses to her face, making her giggle. “It’s okay, we still love mommy even though she’s silly, right?”
“You better,” you flicked his shoulder as you walked by after grabbing an ice cream sandwich from the freezer. 
“Hey, I’ve got something in my bag I forgot to give you, do you mind bringing it over here?” James asked, motioning to the briefcase on the armchair closest to the front door. 
You nodded your head and stood up again to grab it and pass it to him. He rummaged through it with one hand while still holding Liana before passing you what looked like a receipt. 
“Uh thanks?” you looked a little confused. 
“Read what it’s for,” James chuckled. “They’ll get delivered next week.” 
“James,” you put the receipt down. “You didn’t.” 
“You’ve been talking about it for four months, I had to do something,” he shrugged. “And I didn’t get you anything for your baby shower.” 
“Because you planned it,” you laughed. “Seriously this is a lot. I don’t know if I can accept this.” 
“Just think of it this way. I’m here all the time, we like to go out with Liana together and it’s a great stroller with good safety ratings.” 
“Okay sure you’ll use that, but the cot too?” 
“The one you have in there’s been recalled, I was just doing you a favour,” he said. 
You chuckled a little, pressing your lips together. “Liana, my darling, we are very spoiled.” 
“I’ll come over when it gets delivered and help set it up,” James said. 
“I still don’t know what to say, James, this is…really generous of you.” 
“Believe me, right now nothing makes me happier, and I mean that,” he reached out a hand to you and you took it, giving it a gentle squeeze. 
As promised, the next week James was back at your home to help set up the stroller and the cot and you figured it would be the right time to pull out that camcorder your father had gotten you to help record some memories you were making with Liana. 
“Hey, James wanna tell the camera what you’re doing?” 
“Wondering why I didn’t get a degree in engineering apparently.” he mumbled while hunched over some instructions, a pencil behind his ear and his sleeves rolled up to his elbows. 
“What does your assistant think?” you moved the camera over to Liana, sitting in a rocking seat that was propped up next to James. 
“That this video isn’t going to be very good for my image in the future. This stuff is worse than IKEA,” he scratched the back of his head. 
“You’re doing great,” you assured him and came to give him an encouraging side hug. “Alright, let me stop this video and we can try and tackle it together.” 
You put the camera down on the bed and looked over the instructions with James, having a bit of an easier time piecing things together compared to him, so in the end you were put on deciphering the instructions while he assembled the cot. 
An embarrassing amount of time later, the cot was completely assembled (only after having to disassemble it all the first time because there was one piece left over and you had no idea what step you had missed using it), and you carefully placed Liana inside to see how it would hold up. 
“You know they say you can be proud of something you built with your own two hands, but I’m afraid this is going to fall apart,” James said. 
“We followed the instructions really carefully, it should be fine,” you said, trying to convince yourself. “And Liana looks comfortable in there, look at her she’s giggling.” 
“I think that’s because we look like we’ve been building a house or something,” he looked between you, seeing your dirty clothes and messed up hair. 
“Who knew putting together a cot would be so labour intensive,” you chuckled. “I think we can safely say we deserve some takeout. What do you want?” 
“Anything, I’m starving,” James sat down on the edge of the bed. “You think this will help her sleep a little better?” 
“Let’s hope so,” you rubbed your temples. “You coming?” you asked, taking Liana out of the cot and carrying her out towards the door. 
“Yeah, I’ll be out in a minute,” he nodded and you left him in the room, staring at the wooden baby’s bed in front of him. It was a simple thing you had both made together, but for James, it was starting to feel like so much more than just that. 
You built a cot, but what did building a cot mean? What did it mean that he bought it for you without a second question or a moment’s hesitation? What did it mean that he couldn’t seem to wipe the smile off his face every single time he stepped into this house? 
It probably meant a lot of things, but at the moment, to James, it felt like he had a family and he’d hold onto that for as long as he was able to. 
As much as you wished it could be, not every day was easy. Today was one of those days at the end of a long week and you wanted nothing more than to collapse and call it quits. 
Something was wrong with Liana, she was never this fussy, but all the doctors would just repeat the same thing over and over again. 
She has colic. 
You have a colic-y baby. 
Your baby has colic. She’s going to be fine.
She didn’t sound fine. Not when she would cry and cry and you didn’t know what was happening or how to make her feel better. It made your heart feel tight and constricted especially when all you could do was bounce and rock her in hopes that it might soothe whatever was going on inside her. 
You were so focused on the sounds of the crying baby you didn’t hear the door unlock as James entered the house. After putting down his bags, he followed the sound of the crying before finding you in the rocking chair in your room, gently hushing Liana to try and coax her back to sleep. 
“James,” you tried to stand up when you noticed he was there, but he rushed over to your side, placing a hand on your shoulder and encouraging you to sit back down. “I’m afraid we’re not really having a fun day today. You might want to just go home and rest,” you suggested. 
“What’s going on?” he asked. 
“James, I’m serious I-,” 
“Hey,” he said gently, quieting you as a hand came to hold your cheek. “Talk to me, mom. What’s happening?” 
You pressed your lips together and shook your head. 
“I don’t know,” you let the tears spill from your eyes, just as they were for Liana, but you basked in the comfort James’ simple action offered. “She just keeps crying and I don’t know what’s wrong. T-They kept saying she has colic, but this isn’t colic, James.” 
He nodded his head and wiped away your tears while trying to think of a solution to the problem in front of you. 
“I have an idea, just give me a second, I’ll be right back.” 
James went off to the kitchen and came back with a bit of a white powder on his finger. He helped you sit Liana up before getting her to eat a little bit of it. 
“What is that?” 
“Just baking soda. I saw this in a few babies. Doctors think it’s colic, but it’s reflux. Have you been eating anything different from usual?” he asked. 
“Me?” 
“Yeah, it might be something she’s allergic to getting in the breast milk,” he explained while rubbing Liana’s back. “Here let me take her so you can have a break. Go to the kitchen, get some water and write down a list of what you’ve been eating recently and we’ll go over it and see if we can find anything that lines up with her fussiness.” 
“Are you sure?” 
“I’ll survive,” he nodded. 
You passed over your baby to him and made your way out of the room, following James’ suggestion and noticing how with a little bit of time her crying had quieted down and instead was replaced by softer sniffles and a much nicer sound. It drew you away from the list you were leaning over and back to the door of the bedroom where you leaned in the frame and watched and listened while James, with his back turned to you, sang a soft lullaby to Liana. 
I love you forever, I’ll like you for always, as long as I’m living, my baby you’ll be.
Over and over like a prayer until Liana’s sniffles had faded and there was only silence. 
He carefully put her back in her bed, waiting a few moments to make sure she was really sleeping, before turning back and seeing you standing in the doorway. 
When he made his way up to you, you reached out and pulled him into as tight of a hug as you’d ever given him. You held onto the sleeves of your shirt while one arm came under his and across his back with the other around his neck, holding him as close to you as you possibly could. 
“You okay?” James asked and you nodded your head, silently while a few more tears streamed down your face. 
“I will be.” 
“I-,” James faltered for a moment, but he said it anyway. “I love you.” 
“I love you too.” 
Three words he had said so many times, that had meant a particular thing when he said them to you, but now he couldn’t help but feel like they meant something a little different. 
You both stayed like that a moment longer before you pulled apart, wiping away your tears and going back to your list to see if James’ theory could be correct. 
“Maybe try cutting these ones out of your diet,” he suggested. “See if she gets any better and if not call me and I’ll get her an appointment with one of the pediatricians at the hospital.” 
“Okay,” you nodded. “I just don’t get why they kept saying colic like is that just some doctor term for I don’t know what’s wrong, but your baby is fussy?” 
“I don’t know,” James shook his head, “but don’t ever let anyone bully you into not trusting your gut. She’s your daughter and you know her best.” 
“You seem to know her pretty well too. You took one look at her and managed to help her when I couldn’t,” you pinched the bridge of your nose. 
“Coincidence,” he patted your shoulder. 
“Give yourself a little credit. You’re with her a lot too, it’s part of why I trust your judgement so much when it comes to her. I know you’re not just going to tell me some medical mumbo jumbo you…you’re with her, you see how she is, you know.” 
“I don’t know how you managed to hold it together so well,” James said. “I was in there with her for twenty minutes and I wanted to cry right with her.” 
“It’s so hard,” you shook your head. “You can tell she’s uncomfortable, that something’s wrong, but she can’t tell you what.” 
James nodded his head, “Before you know it she’ll be walking and talking and hopefully it’ll be a lot easier to understand what she needs.” 
“It’s hard to imagine that,” you chuckled. “She is growing so fast though.” 
“And you’re doing a great job,” James wrapped an arm around your shoulder and you took a deep breath. You wanted to correct him and say ‘we’re doing a great job’, but everything about this felt so delicate. It wasn’t his responsibility to parent Liana and you didn’t want to pressure him into thinking that it had become that, but regardless you felt like he’d been around so much it would be wrong to give yourself full credit for everything. 
“It takes a village,” you settled on saying, extending your arm so it was wrapped around him as well. “Speaking of a village, I need to hire a nanny.” 
“So you’re going to go back to work?” he asked and you nodded. 
“Just part time for now. Pay is good enough. I should be fine with that for a while.” 
“Good,” James nodded. “Do you need help going through resumes?” 
“Nah, Janine is taking care of that for me, her boyfriend works with the police so free background checks. She’s gonna send me a short list and then I’ll interview them.” 
You looked up at James and chuckled, 
“You seem surprised.” 
“I didn’t know you outsourced to other people too,” he teased. 
“Are you jealous, Jamie?” you tickled his sides a little bit. “Come on, you know you’re my number one. Can you seriously tell me you could have gotten police-level background checks on nannies?” 
“I could have tried.” 
“I appreciate the sentiment, but I’m gonna save you from this job so you can help me with other stuff, okay?” you turned him around and patted his chest. “I love you, James, but you can’t do it all. I have to look out for you too.” 
“You don’t have to look after me,” he assured you. “You’ve got a lot on your plate, I can take care of myself.” 
“James, that’s the whole point of this,” you pointed between you. “I’m not about to let it be one-sided.” 
“Is that why you keep packing me lunches?” he asked. 
“Maybe,” you shrugged. “And it's kind of fun leaving you little notes.” 
“House thinks I’m seeing someone because of what you put in the last one. He steals my food, you know.” 
“I’ll just pack double next time,” you laughed. 
James smiled at the sound of your laughter, savouring the moment of levity he was able to bring you after a long and hard few days. 
You looked back up at him once your laughter had died down and filled with a quiet sense of gratitude, you could help but lean into his side, sighing contentedly and it made you feel warm to the touch when his arm wrapped around you and pulled you in closer. 
Things may not have been simple or easy, but at least they felt right.
James was just about to leave his office to get some food in the cafeteria when he heard the phone ring, keeping him seated at his desk so he could answer. 
“Hello, Oncology Department. Dr. James Wilson speaking.”
“James, it’s me,” you said quickly, almost like you were in a hurry. 
“Is something wrong?” he asked. 
“Nothing dire,” you sighed. “My nanny got sick and my backup nanny is out of town and I have this huge meeting at work I cannot miss, but I-I don’t have anyone to look after Liana. I hate to ask this, you know I wouldn’t bug you unless it was a real emergency, but can I bring her by? Just for two maybe three hours tops. Then I’ll come grab her and she can be in my office with me for the rest of the day.”
“Yeah, of course, bring her over,” James nodded. “I have a few patient consults today, but nothing too strenuous or contagious for a small baby.”
“James, are you sure? I feel really bad asking-,”
“It’s fine. Today was going to be boring anyway, I could use some Liana time to spice things up.”
“James, I love you, you’re a lifesaver,” you breathed a sigh of relief. “I owe you one okay? Cash it in whenever.”
“I’ll keep that in mind,” he chuckled. “I’m gonna go grab a quick bite to eat. I’ll meet you in my office when you come.”
“Great, see you then.”
You both hung up and when James came back upstairs you were just arriving at his office with Liana strapped in her car seat and a bag slung around your shoulder. 
“Okay, I’ve got snacks, and a carrier, and her toys, and-,”
“Goodness, take a breath,” James chuckled. “We’re gonna be fine, I’ve looked after her before.” 
“I know, I know. I’m just nervous about this meeting and rushing around to get everything prepped and then the nannies fell through,” you took a deep breath to try and slow your heart down and James put a hand on your shoulder assuring you everything was going to be alright. 
“You’re gonna kill it at that meeting, alright?” he pulled you in for a quick hug. 
“Thanks again, I seriously appreciate and love you and your big fat heart.” 
“Thanks, I think,” he chuckled again. “I love you too.”
You kissed your hand and tapped it on his cheek before doing the same for Liana who smiled and James took a moment to stare out the door and watch you as you left the room, still feeling his heart beating a little faster after having said I love you. 
Ever since the day he came over when Liana was having a hard time, his heart would race and his palms would get sweaty every time he’d say those three words, knowing he meant it in a different way than he had been saying it all these years. 
“Liana banana, what am I gonna do,” James sighed and bent down so he was at eye level with her. “Do you think your mom knows?”
Liana babbled a response. 
“Me neither,” he sighed. “It’s okay though, cause we’re gonna have a fun day right?”
He unclipped her from the seat after fastening the baby carrier to his back to begin with before propping her up and clipping her inside. 
Once he was content with that, he checked the time and noticed he was almost late for a meeting with a patient who was staying at the hospital for treatment. 
James made his way down the halls, knowing not many would question him about the baby on his back, that was aside from his boss who now seemed to be walking directly towards him. 
He quickly took a detour into an empty room and thinking he lost her, let out a breath only to be startled when the door opened and Cuddy was standing in front of him. 
“Wilson,” she started. 
“Mhmm.”
“What’s on your back?” she asked, trying to get a better look, but James simply turned around.
“Oh it’s just a backpack,” he lied, only to be immediately ratted out by Liana’s nonsensical sounds. 
“You have a talking backpack?” Cuddy looked at him skeptically. 
“No, it’s a tumour. I’m dying,” he lied again, even more poorly than before.
Cuddy sighed, “Are we gonna get sued for it?” 
James pressed his lips together and shook his head. 
“Will someone get mad at you for it?”
He shook his head again.
“Is House involved?”
A third time. 
“Okay,” she nodded slowly. “I won’t question your…talking backpack tumour.”
James nodded his head and Cuddy left the room which hopefully meant he was in the clear for the rest of the day. 
Liana had other ideas and decided she didn’t like being in the carrier on his back anymore and began to cry. James wondered what was different, he’d done this with her before, but perhaps it was the new environment and she just wanted to be where she could see him.
So after some maneuvering, he changed the positioning of the carrier and put Liana back inside and she seemed much more relaxed afterwards. 
When he got to his patient he apologized for being late, but they were more focused on the child that James had yet to introduce. 
“Sorry, I’m a little all over the place right now,” he chuckled. “This is Liana, she’s going to be joining us today.”
“Is she your daughter?” he asked, seeing the way James smiled and held her when he introduced her. 
“No,” James shook his head. “She’s the daughter of one of my close friends. I’m just doing her a favour today.”
“Either way, it’s always nice to see someone smiling and happy around here.”
“Yeah, I thought so too,” James nodded. 
“How old is she?”
“Six months as of two weeks ago.”
“They grow fast, don’t they?”
James smiled and nodded, “They sure do.”
They continued their consult, and before long James wrapped things up and headed back to his office to meet with another patient. 
This time around he was feeding and burping Liana throughout the meeting and it felt so much like second nature to him, it didn’t take him away at all from the questions the patient was asking, and much like he expected, having a baby in the room was a nice distraction from the heavy subject matter. 
He got through the next few patients with ease, and he felt lucky that House only decided to come in after all his meetings were over. 
“Is that a baby?” House squinted, looking at Liana who was calmly playing with a toy in James’ lap. 
“No, it’s an alien,” he deadpanned and House ignored his comment. 
“Why do you have a baby? That must be breaking some hospital rule.”
“Since when do you care about rules?”
“Cause rules are there to protect us,” House said sarcastically. “Is this the one you spend all your free time with?”
“Her name is Liana,” James said while standing up and moving to put her in her car seat for a moment. “House, I’m gonna ask you to do something and I’m going to trust that you won’t blow this up in my face.”
“Go on.”
“I need to use the washroom, but you’ve seen the way they get cleaned here, I don’t want to bring Li with me,” he said. “Can you watch her for five minutes? You don’t even have to do anything, just stare at her in the carrier.”
House thought about it for a moment before eventually agreeing, James completely oblivious to his friend’s ulterior motive.
House first sat across from her, turning her car seat around on the table so it was facing him. They stared at each other for a few moments before House stood up and grabbed a picture from one of James’ shelves, sitting back down in front of her. 
“You’re probably too young to do this, but never too young to learn, right?”
Liana had no response. 
“You see this guy?” House pointed to James in the photo. “He’s dada, right?”
House continued to prompt her, even though he knew she was too young to speak, thinking this would make a great prank if he played his cards right. 
House continued to go back and forth with Liana between her babbles, until he heard James begin to open the door of the office. 
“Everything okay?” he asked. 
“Perfect,” House nodded. “Your daughter’s an angel.” 
James frowned, unable to tell if House was being sarcastic or not, but he was quickly distracted by the frame in his hand.
“Why do you have that picture?” James came closer and took it from him.
“Oh, just trying to pass the time with a story.” 
“The story of what exactly? This is just a picture of me with my parents.” 
“I don’t know I made something up, she’s a baby, she won’t remember,” House insisted before leaving the office before James could ask any more questions. 
A little confused by the encounter, he made his way over to Liana who was reaching out for him. 
He checked the time, seeing as your meeting should probably have been over by then and decided to give you a call. 
“Hey, I was just about to come and pick Liana up,” you said. 
“Yeah, about that, do you just want to leave her with me for the rest of the day?” he asked. “She’s been really good and honestly I think the patients have been loving seeing a baby around.” 
“James, it’s fine, my meeting is over. I can come get her,” you said. 
James pressed his lips together before gathering the nerve to say what he was going to say. 
“I actually would really like it if she could stay with me,” he said. “If you’re okay with it.”
You paused, “This isn’t just some round about way for you to find a way to give me a break?” you asked. 
“No, I’m really happy she’s here. I was going to come over after work anyways.” 
“You still have the car seat hookup in your car?” you asked and he confirmed. “Okay, call me if you need anything, Jamie.” 
“I will, and thank you.” 
“Just don’t break her, okay, she’s not replaceable,” you teased. 
“I’ll bring her back in one piece,” James chuckled. “We’ll be fine, right Li?” 
James gave her a little tickle so that you could hear her laugh in response and you couldn't help but smile before saying goodbye and feeling more at ease leaving her with James than you ever had leaving her with a babysitter. 
It always felt interesting coming back to Princeton-Plainsboro after you had given birth to Liana. It brought back a lot of memories, both good and maybe not so great of your pregnancy, but recently you and Liana had been visiting a little more often to have lunch with James when you weren’t working. 
Today wasn’t one of those days, you were actually just on your way back home after running a few errands and since you were in the area you thought you might stop in and talk to James about that evening. 
When you went by his office you peeked inside and noticed he wasn’t there and before you could decide the best course of action, you heard a semi familiar voice behind you. 
“You looking for Wilson?” 
You turned around and saw House standing in front of you. 
“Yeah, actually. Do you know where he is?” 
“I think he just went to Cuddy’s office,” he said. 
“Alright, I’ll head back downstairs then,” you smiled and were about to haul Liana’s car seat with you, but House stopped you. 
“If you want I can look after her in my office,” he said.
“Really?” you seemed a little surprised from the offer, but figured it couldn’t be too bad to leave her with him for five minutes. 
“Sure,” House nodded, making it seem like it was no big deal, when really he had already pocketed a picture of James and was looking for another opportunity to continue his prank. 
“Alright, I’ll be back in a few minutes,” you said while walking over to his office and putting her car seat on the main table before walking down the hallways and over to the elevator to go and find James, but just to your luck, he was coming out just as you had planned to enter. “Hey, I was looking for you,” you smiled. 
“Oh, I didn’t realize you were coming, did we make plans?” he asked, worried he’d forgotten about something. 
“No, I was just in the area and, well my mom and dad are coming over for dinner tonight, I was wondering if you wanted to join us.” 
“Dinner sounds nice,” James nodded. “And I haven’t seen your parents in a while, I just seem to miss them every time they come into town.” 
“Yeah, that’s why I thought I’d ask, also maybe as a warning in case you wanted to get as far away as you could,” you chuckled. 
“Come on, they’re not that bad,” he nudged you. 
“Most of the time, but then again, you’re not their child.” 
“Wait, where’s Liana?” James asked. “With a sitter at home?” 
“No, I left her with House.” 
James’ eyes went wide, “You left her with House?”
“Yeah, what’s the big deal?” you chuckled as James began to walk towards House’s office to make sure he wasn’t up to one of his many schemes. “James he offered!” you called back and that only made him walk faster. 
It took you a minute to catch up with him, but by that time he was already interrogating House who was simply sitting in front of Liana. 
“Can't I offer to look after my friend’s friend’s baby?” House asked. 
“Usually someone could, but when that person is you you may see why I think you have some ulterior motive.” 
“James what’s going on?” you asked, coming closer to House. “Liana’s fine, I don’t know why you’re being so dramatic.” 
“Yeah, listen to single mom over here,” he pointed to you. 
James backed off if only for your sake, but he still kept a close eye on House as you picked up Liana’s car seat and told James you’d see him after his shift was over. 
He nodded his head and you exchanged a kiss on the cheek before heading out. 
“You’re really telling me you’re not getting some of that on the side?” House asked. 
“House, drop it,” James was unamused. “I know you’re up to something, I just don’t know what.” 
“I guess you’re just going to have to wait and find out,” House shrugged. “In the meantime may I suggest you go get your freak on with the mom? You know she probably hasn’t slept with anyone since that kid was conceived, I’m sure you’d have an easy time convincing her.” 
“Shut up, House,” James rolled his eyes and left the office before he could suggest anything more obscene. 
He was thankful when the end of his shift came, and before heading to your place he made a stop at the store to buy some flowers and dessert to bring over. 
By this point, it was such a habit, he never knocked, just opened the door with his key and announced his presence to whoever was in the house. 
“Hey Liana, look who’s here,” you smiled and pointed to James while Liana was being held by your mother. 
Liana became very excited at the sight of him and he quickly put down the things he brought on the table before saying his greetings and giving special attention to Liana by means of a kiss on her nose and caress of her face. 
“Do you want something to drink?” you asked. “Mom and dad brought some fancy-looking sparkling fruit juice.” 
“I could go for some of that,” James nodded. “How have you guys been, I missed you the last time you were in town.” 
“We’ve been good,” your dad nodded. 
“Unfortunately our granddaughter doesn’t come to visit us very much,” your mom gave you a bit of a look and you rolled your eyes. 
“Mom, you guys are retired, I have a job, why don’t we keep this ‘you visit me’ arrangement a while longer until my life sorts itself out a bit more.” 
“She’s not wrong, honey,” your dad came and patted his wife’s shoulder. 
“I know, I just wish we got to see Liana more. We should come down more often.” 
“What about you, James, anything new in your life?” 
James looked over at you before shaking his head. 
“No, still working at the same place still…” 
“Trying to find the right person,” you filled in for him, placing a hand on his shoulder and handing him his drink. 
“Yeah,” he nodded with a soft smile and couldn’t help but laugh a little internally at the irony. Maybe the right person had been there all along, the person he’d never once pulled away from, the person he let take care of him, the person who he’d realized he’d most definitely fallen in love with, but risking things between you was out of the question so he would have to be content with the way things were. 
“You’re the head of your department, right?” your mom asked and James nodded. “Wow, that’s quite something, your parents must be proud of you.” 
“Yes, it never fails to come up in conversation with my mother,” he chuckled. 
Liana began to fuss a little bit in her grandmother’s arms and after a few failed attempts at calming her down James offered to take over. 
“Are you sure, honey?” she asked. “She gets a bit cranky and it’s hard to calm her down.” 
“Don’t worry mom, James is an expert,” you assured her. 
James nodded and confirmed he was sure before gently bouncing Liana until she stopped crying and wiping away whatever tears of hers were remaining. 
“She seems very attached to you,” your dad remarked and James looked down at Liana who now had her head resting against his chest. 
“The feeling’s quite mutual,” James chuckled. “Does she need to be fed?” he asked you. 
“Yeah we’re probably getting close to that time now, I’ll warm up the bottle. Maybe I can feed her and you can deal with the sauce on the stove, it’s missing something and I can’t place it.” 
“Sure,” James nodded and waited for you to heat up Liana’s bottle before passing her over and taking a turn at the stove. 
Your parents watched your interactions curiously and shared a few looks between themselves, but chose to say nothing. They’d known James since you were both nineteen and a lot of things had happened since then, but a lot of time had passed too. It was interesting how your comfort with each other in friendship had so naturally extended itself in this way that you were practically functioning as a family whether you noticed it, or maybe deliberately chose to ignore it. 
After you fed Liana and burped her, she was quick to fall asleep and you placed her in her cot in your room before joining James and your parents in the kitchen where they were bringing things to the dining room to lay them out on the table.
“This looks really delicious sweetheart, thank you for making dinner,” your dad said. “And you too James for taking over there in the home stretch.” 
“For all we know it could have tasted terrible before he came in so he can take the credit for that,” you chuckled. 
“No, I gave it a taste before adding anything. It just needed a little something sour to balance some things out, otherwise it was perfect,” he assured you. 
Dinner with your parents was mostly small talk. They shared a little about some of your relatives they had recently spoken to or visited and asked James how his family was doing and they left fairly early to start the drive back home. 
“I’ll load the dishes you put away the leftovers?” James yawned and you chuckled. 
“How about I do both since I had a day off and you go and lay down for a bit,” you suggested. 
“I don’t know what you’re talking about I’m fine,” James waved his hand but yawned again. 
“Go to sleep, James. That’s not a suggestion,” you walked up to him. “My ex left some sweatpants here you can change into those and take off this button up,” you tugged at his shirt. 
James pressed his lips together and nodded his head, before heading over to the bedroom and quietly getting changed before climbing into bed and not fighting the sleep that came. 
He initially wasn’t sure how much later it was when he woke up, but by the looks of it much too late to go come considering you were next to him, despite being groggy, he had a million and one things crossing his mind, but all of those were thrown out when he heard Liana begin to cry. 
You shifted next to him, waking up to go and take care of it, but James put an arm on your shoulder. 
“I’ve got it, go back to sleep,” he assured you. 
You were too tired to argue with him and let your head hit the pillow again while he stood up and picked Liana up from her crib, heading out to the kitchen so he could heat up a bottle for her before coming back and sitting in the chair to feed her. 
You watched the scene in front of you and you felt yourself wanting to memorize every detail. How he held her, the quiet things he whispered, the way she curled into his arms while he stood up and rocked her back to sleep. 
When he came back to the bed he noticed you were awake and he let out a soft chuckle and you smiled looking up at him with his messy hair. Suddenly you were nineteen again and banging on the door of cabin 3 trying to wake your fellow counsellor to come and deal with an emergency. To you he looked the same as he did all those years ago. 
“I told you to go back to sleep.” 
“Not everyone can fall asleep instantly,” you yawned with a chuckle. 
“You didn’t wake me up to leave,” he said quietly, his head resting on his hand that propped him up. 
“You always look so peaceful when you sleep, I feel evil whenever I have to wake you up,” you remarked, but behind your eyes if he could see through the darkness of the room, he would have seen them saying something else. That you wanted him to stay, you didn’t want to wake him up because you wanted to wake up next to him. “You don’t mind do you?” 
“That you’re making me do the walk of shame in the morning?” James teased and shook his head. 
“Just shut up and go back to sleep, Jamie,” you yawned with a chuckle. 
He moved so he was laying down on his back with an arm behind his head and you couldn’t tear your eyes away from him. Maybe he could feel you staring because he reached his other arm out and pulled you closer and you moved with him until your head rested against his chest, your arm draped over top of him. 
He gave you a gentle squeeze with the arm that was wrapped around you and pressed a kiss to the top of your head. 
“Goodnight, Jamie,” you mumbled into his shirt. 
You couldn’t see how he looked down and smiled at you after you said that, all that filled your ears was a quiet, “Goodnight.”
“I haven’t seen you in a few days, how have you been?” 
James sat on the carpet of the living room, playing with Liana who was crawling around him while you brought over two mugs of tea so you could chat while you entertained the growing baby. 
“Good for the most part, just had a patient who wasn’t doing so great so I spent some extra time at the hospital to keep an eye on things. Not to mention House has been bugging me to go out and it’s been a while so I figured what’s the harm.”
“He got you plastered and you made a fool of yourself, didn’t he?” you asked and James nodded while you laughed. “Liana, did James go out with House and act like an idiot?” you tickled the ten month old and she giggled before coming closer to you, tapping on your legs with her hands. 
“Don’t listen to your mama, Li, she’s trying to-,”
“Mama,” Liana repeated after James had spoken and you both stopped dead in your tracks. 
You looked over at James and his smile was just as wide as yours before you picked Liana up and smothered her with kisses. 
“Liana, look at you! You said your first word!”
“Good job, Liana banana,” James grinned and gave her cheek a little pinch which made her reach out to him and say, 
“Dada.”
You both had a similar reaction to what happened moments ago, only this time it was pure shock. Maybe you had misheard her, but when she repeated herself, James could feel his heart drop to the pit of his stomach. 
“I-I don’t know where she learnt that from,” he told you. “I swear I didn’t teach her that.”
It took a minute for the shock to fade away for you, but once it did you tried to assure James that it was okay. 
“I believe you,” you said. “I-I don’t know where she picked it up from, but it’s okay.”
James chewed on his lip, it wasn’t okay though because he wanted nothing more than to hear Liana say that again. 
“It’s not though,” James said softly. “I love her, but I’m not her dad. That’s not fair to her or to you.”
“Jamie,” you pleaded with him, but he still seemed stuck on something. 
“I’m really sorry,” he apologized again. “I feel like I ruined a special moment.”
“I’m trying to tell you it really doesn’t matter,” you assured him, you could see it in his eyes, he wanted to leave, to let you have time alone, but you didn’t want to be alone, you wanted him to stay with you. “Please…please stay.”
James reached out his hand to hold yours and was about to give you his answer when his pager went off. 
Your heart clenched and you watched as he read the message and sighed, standing up because he was needed again at the hospital. 
“Your patient?” you asked, picking Liana up and standing next to him. 
He nodded his head, “They were scheduled for an unrelated surgery and there were some complications, I have to go.”
You understood and James wrapped you in a tight hug and you kissed his cheek. 
“I love you, Jamie.”
“I love you too,” he whispered, wishing he could hold onto you and never let you go, but instead he was pulled away from your warm embrace wondering how on earth Liana had learnt to call him dad. 
“You look like you haven’t slept in days, spending time with the baby again?” House asked, waltzing into James’ office. 
“No, I haven't been over in a few days,” James shook his head. 
“You haven’t been over in a few days…Something happened,” House deduced and James gave him a look. 
“Nothing happened. I’m just taking a break,” he lied. 
“You’ve been going non-stop to spend time with them since the baby was born ten months ago, why do you need a break now?” 
“Because I have a lot on my mind and there’s a few new patients I need to focus on-,” 
“You’re lying.” 
“Yes I am,” James admitted and House grinned. 
“Really?” 
“No, I’m not,” he shook his head and continued to look down and do his work. 
“We do this every single time and every single time I’m right,” House said. “Why don’t we save the back and forth for another time and just skip to the part where you tell me what’s going on.” 
“Oh really and you were right that time you thought I was cheating on my wife and she was the one cheating on me?” he asked. 
“Okay, so I’m not perfect,” House shrugged. “What happened, Wilson? I could just as easily get your friend’s number and ask directly if that’s what you’d prefer.” 
“God no,” James shook his head. “Leave her alone, she doesn’t need to deal with you on top of working and raising a child.” 
“Alright then, what happened?” 
James took a deep breath and sighed, “Liana called me dad the other day. I have no idea where she learnt it from.” 
“She started speaking,” House nodded, pressing his lips together. “Was it her first word or-,” 
“Second. She said mom first,” James said, but caught a glimpse of his friend trying to fight back a smile and suddenly all the offers to take care of Liana paired with the photographs made sense. “You taught her!” he exclaimed. “House I can’t believe you’d pull a prank on me by manipulating my friend’s baby!” 
“Oh come on, it’s not that big of a deal,” House rolled his eyes. 
“House, I cannot believe you!” 
“You’re not mad at me,” House shook his head. “You’re just mad you liked it.” 
“No I’m-,” 
“Yes, you are,” the diagnostician emphasized. “You’ve been sitting here tearing yourself apart for the past four days because she called you dad and you liked it. You’re mad at yourself for liking it because she’s not your kid.” 
“No,” James quieted down. “She’s not.” 
“You haven’t gone back because you’re afraid to hear her say it again, aren’t you?” 
“Since when did you become an expert on my personal problems, House? You caused this, why should I listen to anything you have to say?” 
“Because you’re being an idiot. You’re punishing yourself for liking something. Do you realize how insane that sounds?” 
“It’s not insane, House, she’s not my baby-,” 
“Sure, she’s not your baby and you have her feeding and nap routine memorized. You’ve been to her doctor's appointments, she’s calmer in your arms than she is in the arms of her grandparents. Yeah, go and tell that to any moron sitting out there and they’ll tell you for me, you’re being an idiot.” 
James sighed again, “And why do you care?” 
“Because once you’re done with this spiral we can go back to the way things were when you weren’t a boring depressed lump.” 
“How kind of you,” James faked a smile. 
House’s pager went off, leaving James alone again in his office, thinking about what his friend had said. 
You’d told him so many times that things were okay, but maybe a part of him didn’t want to let him believe that you didn’t mind because that was a slippery slope to him facing himself and his feelings and he didn’t care what his heart was telling him, he wouldn’t put himself through that. He wouldn’t put you and Liana through that. But at the same time, he couldn’t keep himself away forever. He didn’t want that either.
So with a deep breath he picked up his office phone and dialled your number, putting it up to his ear and waiting for the line to connect on the other end. 
“Hello?” 
“Hey, it’s me.” 
“James,” your voice sounded almost relieved. “H-Hey, how are you?” 
He pressed his lips together, “Miserable, actually. I miss you guys.” 
“We miss you too,” you chuckled with a small sniffle. 
“C-Can I come over for dinner tonight?” he asked. 
“You still have a key, what do you think?” you asked with a bit of a laugh. “I’ll see you tonight.” 
“Yeah, see you then,” James smiled and after he hung up the phone he took a deep breath, his fast heartbeat slowing down by the second. 
Maybe this time House was right.
The next few weeks passed by and things resumed to their normal state, much to House’s delight. James’ role as department head always meant at least one day a week where he would stay late and do some extra paperwork, dealing with anything that may have slipped through the cracks before. 
This time, that had fallen on a Sunday and it was just past dinner when he heard a knock on his door and wondering who was on the other end he called for them to come in. 
You opened the door a crack and again asked permission to come in and James smiled at you, looking up from his paperwork, not expecting to see you in the hospital. 
“Hey, I wasn’t expecting to see you here, what’s going on?” 
“I just wanted to drop by and bring you something for dinner, I know it’s your paperwork day.” 
“Thanks, that’s really sweet of you,” he stood up from his chair and came to stand in front of his desk, leaning back on it while you placed the take out bag on the table. “Where’s Liana?” 
“Oh Helen’s looking after her tonight,” you said. “I had a few things I needed to do and um just wanted the evening off,” you admitted. 
“Fair enough,” James nodded. 
“I actually brought you something else,” you rolled back and forth on the balls of your feet and James noticed the tension in your stature. “H-Here,” you handed him a gift bag which he eyed curiously. 
Today wasn’t his birthday or some memorable event you celebrated together. There wasn’t much of a reason to get him a present which made it all the more intriguing. 
He pulled out a wrapped rectangular box from the bag, and putting the bag aside he began to carefully tear away the wrapping paper to reveal what looked like a picture frame. Overlaid on the frame, on top of the photo, James noticed a card which he unfolded to read its contents. 
Happy Father’s Day. We love you loads. - Liana and Mom
James moved the card to see the picture and put his hand over his mouth, feeling tears involuntarily form in his eyes as he saw the familiar scene of your room, lit by the light of your lamp as Liana was fast asleep against his chest while he napped on the armchair. 
James quickly wiped away the few tears that were in his eyes and looked up at you with a grateful smile, looking back down at the image before placing it neatly on his desk along with the card. 
“I hope you like it,” you said quietly, biting your lip. “I thought you might want to have a copy of that picture and…you know just a thank you for everything you’ve done for me and Liana this past year.” 
“I love it,” he assured you. “I-I love it and I love you.” 
“I love you too,” you smiled.
“N-No,” James came closer and reached out, taking your hands in his. “I…I love you. I’m in love with you.” 
“Jamie,” you spoke in a breathy whisper, unsure of how you lost your voice. “I-,” you opened your mouth to speak again, but paused when James raised a hand to your face, wiping away the tears you didn’t even notice had begun to stream down. 
“I just don’t want to be away from you, ever,” he said softly. “I never did. And now with Liana, I want to be there, for all of it.” 
You held the wrist of his hand that held your face, pulling him in closer so your foreheads rested against each other. 
You took in a shaky breath, thinking back on those words. Something you’d been saying to each other for longer than you could remember. The first time was so clear in your mind, you were on the phone racking up long distance charges while James was in Montreal. It had slipped out by accident, a reflex, and you had convinced yourself when the phone had hung up you’d never call him back, unable to face what you’d just said, but before you could spiral any further, he said it back and you never stopped saying it.
For the longest time that was the only occurrence that was memorable, everything else was a blur, that was until a few months ago. It was so simple, you had fallen asleep on the couch and James had made sure Liana was fed and bathed and even cleared up some things in the kitchen before sitting on the couch with some tea and a book. You had talked and said I love you as a thank you, but when the words left your mouth they also left a lingering airiness in your heart, a feather light feeling that came crashing down like an anvil when he left to go home because you realized you never wanted to be apart from him.
It took you a few moments to realize you hadn’t said anything and James was anxiously waiting for some sort of communication, anything, but since the meaning of your words had changed, for both of you, you thought it might be more conducive to work in actions.
You closed in the space between you, at first gently resting your lips on his and letting him lead you in a soft and slow kiss, putting aside all the restraint you both had been using these past months in an effort to protect your friendship.
One of James’ hands held onto your waist, pulling you in so that there was no space left between you. He kissed you again and again, remembering each one as a core memory, engraved in his mind, paired with the feeling of your arms wrapped around his neck, the feeling of your body pressed so closely against his, his heart beating outside of his chest. 
It was easy for his lips to trail away from yours, moving along your jaw, to your temple before you had pulled each other into a warm embrace, simply existing in each other’s arms. James thought to himself what a nice life it would be, not ever having to pull away. 
“I don’t have much to say,” James smiled. “Everything is looking good, you still seem 100% healthy to me.” 
“That’s great news.” 
“It definitely is. Standard procedure, but we’ll have one more of these remission follow ups to make sure everything is still in order then you hopefully won’t have to see me again.” 
“Thank you Dr. Wilson, I really appreciate all you’ve-.” 
“Dad!” 
“Sweetheart, wait he’s with a patient!” 
James turned his head and saw Liana running over to him, you valiantly trying to chase after her without much success. 
He quickly scooped her up in his arms before she crashed into him, pressing a big kiss to her cheek. 
“Sorry about that,” James apologized. “It’s Saturday, we normally have lunch together.” 
“No worries,” he chuckled. 
“Liana, this is my patient Mr. Kimbilio, can you say hi?” 
Liana waved and said hi, very exuberantly. 
“This is my daughter,” James introduced. “And that’s my wife,” he pointed over to you. 
“Daughter,” Mr. Kimbilio smiled. “I think I met you Liana, when you were very small. Your father was looking after you at work and so some of his patients got to meet you.” 
“Really?” she looked up at her dad and he nodded. 
“He’s right, I remember that,” James smiled. “You’ve grown a lot since then, haven’t you Li,” he kissed her cheek again and she giggled.
You finally caught up to the group and James greeted you with a quick kiss, passing Liana off to you so he could wrap things up and you could all go down to the cafeteria for lunch together. 
“If I remember correctly,” Mr. Kimbilio started. “You didn’t introduce her as your daughter the first time we met. I’m glad something changed.” 
“Me too,” James smiled, looking over at his wife and daughter fondly who were now in the midst of making him very proud by pulling off a small prank on House as he came out of his office. 
It didn’t take much longer for them to wrap things up and you and Liana made a quick pit stop inside James’ office before heading downstairs.
Liana went to go sit in James’ seat while he put away his files and organized them. 
It had been a while since you’d been in his office, but it felt like ever since the night you first kissed things had begun to change in the room. 
His desk was now more littered with photos than knickknacks and Liana’s artwork was posted wherever there was room. 
You came around to the other side, looking a little more closely at the pictures. 
There was one of you, James, and Liana on your wedding day, another of just the two of you during an anniversary celebration, Liana’s kindergarten photo from school and another one of you as a family on your last vacation. And still as prominent as ever, the framed photo you had gifted James on his first father’s day. 
“You ready to go?” he asked you, looking up and noticing your eyes gazing at the pictures on his desk. 
When you didn’t initially respond, too focused on what you were looking at, James wrapped an arm around you and tilted your chin towards him so he could press a kiss to your lips.
“I love you,” you smiled and James kissed you again, saying.
“And I love you,” before moving over to pick up Liana and kiss her cheek. “And you.”
Liana giggled, feeling tickled by the kisses and moving to give both of you a kiss on the cheek before saying. 
“Mom, Dad, I’m starving. Can we go eat now?”
“Sure, Liana banana,” James chuckled and you wrapped an arm around him, walking side by side out of the office and in the direction of the elevator to get to the cafeteria, thinking you were pretty lucky that in the end, your best friend listened to his heart and went after what he wanted.
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TAGLIST —
@cuntyvicodin @paola-carter @kiddbegins @il0vebeingdelulu @illicit4ff4irs @lynnsthoughts @miarabanana @iwmflbb @shots-of-wilson-and-whiskey @sarcasm-and-stiles @sun-flower-mad @x-uno @han11dh @qardasngan @alexxavicry
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yanderenightmare · 5 months
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I have an honest question and I don't want to sound rude or anything at all but what's so interesting about CNC. Like I see people hype it up but to me it just feels like romanticizing r4pe..I'm not really into CNC so I can't talk bad or downplay whatever they do but I'm just asking because I want to understand it better.
A question I, by no means, can answer perfectly. However, in the spirit of philosophy and amateur psychology, I will lay unto you, ye who have keen ears, my theories.
Now, I am in no way a psychiatrist. However, as I am a woman who does a great deal of fantasizing and further thinking of what I fantasize about, I thought I might assume the role of a sexologist as it is no protected title.
I’ve long wondered why we (women) fantasize about things that would appall us if manifested in reality. It makes little sense that an act so ruining in practice should make us feel fulfilled when the mere thought of it is humored.
In the vast complexities of psychology, no matter how much I drink of its depths, I can’t seem to get my fill enough to understand it. Trying to figure out female arousal is like pulling hair from a clogged gutter and trying to undo all the knots. It’s a web of contradictions.
However…
First theory – there are cultural reasons. If we accept the inbuilt instincts of old and the instincts we adopt through media while growing up – all in all, the great history of aggressive men dominating passive women – we are conditioned to accept that this is what romance looks like.
Second theory – there are the emotional reasons. The "Beauty and the Beast" motif – featuring classic co-dependency. Women submit to abuse because we have an inbuilt need to nurture others – so when we love men who require to abuse and own us in order to love us, we somehow forget to protect ourselves in favor of loving them, which in this case means allowing them to abuse and own us. It's warped.
Third theory – there are psychological reasons. In fantasies and writing or viewing, we get to reframe traumatic experiences in a positive light or rework traumatic experiences in a safe environment – a form of psychological self-defense, much like Stockholm Syndrome or a type of self-inflicted Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.
Fourth theory – research has also been conducted regarding physiological reasons. Here, we have another inbuilt self-defense mechanism – a seldom talked-about phenomenon – which shows that women tend to become physically aroused when they sense any possibility of sexual aggression in their environment – in order to lower their chance of injury if they are raped.
Through all this, I believe one can narrow fantasies of rough or non-consensual sex into something as paradoxical and polar as having a wish for control and a wish to relent oneself of it. And coming to this conclusion, I realized that such is the pursuit of many, even in endeavors not of the erotic kind.
Humans wish to have control just as much as humans disdain having control. This is why BDSM (bondage, domination, sadism, masochism) kinks and fetishes are found in some shape or form in nearly every romantic or sexual relationship in existence. You’ll have the dominant partner wishing to achieve control over a submissive partner wishing to relinquish control through such means of domination, humiliation, pain, and pleasure.
But it’s more complex than that, isn’t it? 
Yes. Because, contradictory – a submissive partner may wish for control, and a dominant partner may wish to lose it. Human beings are an unyielding paradox where we flex across contrasting aims with no means to an end.
Yes, we wish for control, yet disdain having it. Perhaps we find the answer to this paradox in maintaining control by losing it?
Moreover… how does this relate to nonconsensual sex fantasies?
Here, we get a fifth theory containing the ego – a spin-off of a kind from the third theory. Here we find the wish for control, where, in the lustful fantasy realm, non-consensual sex bolsters a woman's feelings of seductiveness and desirability in the way it has the power to make a man lose his decency and self-control, driving him to commit crimes of passion despite ill consequences of losing his pride and honor as a man – also, ultimately, risking getting sent to prison. 
Put simply, some women enjoy the idea of being irresistible enough to drive even a good man crazy. The thought of being attractive enough to make a man love-sick and the power and control that follows it is, in this case, a turn-on.
A sixth theory – another spin-off from the third theory – is that fantasies of rape allow women to reduce the distress associated with sex, as they are not, in this scenario, responsible for what occurs. Moreover, the logic here states that when one is forced into something, they’ll have a lesser need to feel guilt or shame about acting out their own sexual desires.
Put simply, some women wish to maintain their innocence despite having carnal desires only satiated by means of sinful acts. 
This begs another question.
Is this a lingering feeling of guilt and shame around female sexuality?
Of course! Women are constantly met with disdain when open about their sluttiness.
So, are fantasies of nonconsensual sex a type of projection they do because of this?
In some cases, yes!
Transferring our own sexual desires unto another gives us permission to act them out without feeling guilty or dirty – because, inside this fantasy, it isn’t us committing the indecencies.
... Okay then...
Summing up theories five and six:
Control. To feel wanted, lusted for, obsessed over, and coveted by others. The power of driving someone to lovesick desire, a frenzied state, where they would do anything, even illegal, to have you. Additionally, despite such harsh cases of ego, wanting none of the responsibility for it, wanting to be free of sin, to maintain innocence and purity in light of such dark desires.
Or is there a seventh theory? One found in our idyllic construct of freedom – this aimless goal of ours to make ourselves appreciate breathing – done by balancing the electric powerline between having and losing control.
Is it this act of switching places, the attraction and pull, the stimuli and response, the attack and retaliation? In the chaos of contradictions and uncertainty, we find a thrill that occupies our otherwise hibernating minds – bored to the degree that we become machines in our daily programs. 
Is it simply that we need a little extremity as a remedy for our dull lives?
Do we fall in love with illegal things simply because we are denied them? Simply because they’re illegal? Self-harm, drug use, gambling, murder, rape…
Are these things a part of us? And are we, without them, left feeling unfulfilled? Is The Purge perhaps onto something vitally important? A cure for boredom, this mediocrity that leaves us feeling so blue?
I think, if I were to find a comparison, it’s quite similar to the blind bounds of excitement others ascend to in the midst of playing violent video games. The rush of falling in and out of enemy territory, of danger and safety, from being a predator to becoming the prey, of victory and defeat, of chasing death only to be comforted by one’s remaining life – because in reality, you're safe and sound in front of a screen.
Also, in other cases - rollercoasters, horror movies, extreme sports, etc...
Yes, the wish to trip in and out of control isn’t limited to the realm of lust but is present in most aspects of life. We find it in extreme cases such as drugs, gambling, gaming, relationships, and in other subtle cases of professions and work.
If you don’t like it, that’s your business, and I wish you the best of luck in lust elsewhere.
On another note – and such another warning and disclaimer – I want you not to accept my tales of lust as love stories. Personally, I think hints of toxic displays such as jealousy, obsession, and possession in a partner are natural – but – a difference is made when such feelings become restricting to a degree you no longer feel free. I implore you to make such distinctions for yourself when regarding yourself – and, in extreme cases, when regarding others.
In said regard, I do not condone the events nor the actions of the characters in my stories – neither offender nor victim. Don’t allow yourself to fall prey to toxic partners! The signs are always there – keep a weathered eye out for them.
And no, I’m not blaming those who’ve allowed themselves to stay in toxic relationships. I, myself, am guilty of that. But I won’t excuse my poor judgment either. You know when something doesn’t feel right. We shouldn’t blur the lines of right and wrong in the name of love – or whatever else we may lend our self-control to – such as religion, culture, family, societal pressure, etc...
You are in control. Don’t forget it. And don’t allow anything else to become the case.
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queenofallimagines · 10 months
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Lucifer if you were a Luciferian before coming to the devildom
as a devotee I think this would be fucking hilarious bc I’ve seen people do “hail Satan” shirts but hear me out-
** a treat before part 2
Lucifer:
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- probably will not recognize you off the bat
- Like he’s like “oh ok it’s you” but it doesn’t connect that your HIS
- Like he’s under a lot of pressure right now and stress
- Is pleasantly surprised that you listen so well. Probably gets smug that you listen so obediently
- Sees his sigil on your necklace or something and then it hits him like a fucking BRICK
- Especially if he peeps you doing stuff for him out of habit
- Goes back to look at your file and is like “holy shit I’m literally your patron”
- Will bring it up to you and ask why you don’t make a big deal of it
- “I mean I was already used to living with you? This ain’t much different”
- Ngl in the beginning he would manipulate you about the stairs bc your a good little disciple you’ll do whatever your deity says right?
- But that wouldn’t work bc his first and most basic belief is fuck blind obedience and to question things when uncertain
- Honestly a “fuck I taught you so well but now your using it against me” situation
- Will ease up that you don’t have bad intentions but he’s going to protect his brothers first and foremost
- Will really keep using the line “do not forget that you belong to me” when he’s trying to intimidate you
- But your used to him dragging you to get your life together to its very ineffective
- Gets really frustrated that you already know his nitpicky strict habits because he likes punishing people and lecturing so the fact that he can’t do that to you to be petty really bothers him
- Gets kinda flustered about spending time with you because he’s so used to knowing everything about your life you getting to see him in his home feels too vulnerable for his liking
- Will ABSOLUTELY bring up embarrassing stories about you
- “Ah, remember when you were asking me to help you get a date? Because I definitely do”
- “Me and your ancestors definitely talk about your questionable taste in men”
- Please use this opportunity to be like “this you🤨” because he will have no answer
- “So what the fuck was you sending me all those 11:11 for😐 please elaborate”
- “…. I don’t know what your talking about”
- “What was the reason for you giving me that headache?”
- Will literally Triple his pride when y’all start being intimate
- You’ve given him a god complex but don’t call it that he will get an attitude
- “My most devoted worshiper letting me use them how I wish”
- Will use that as an excuse to fuck you everywhere
- Likes that you have jewelry with his sigil on it or anything you wear for him
- Feels like a collar, letting everyone know you’re his
- Pulls a mammon and calls you “My human” a lot
- Very overprotective
- Probably makes a pact with you In secret before the end of the program
- Like you guys basically already had one why not make it official??
- Especially if he reached out to you and not the other way around? Lmao yeah your definitely his
- If any of the other brothers find out they WILL moan and groan about you not working with them
- Mammon and asmo are the most vocal
- Might end up having to get stuff for them and your altar too love :/
- They will give you stuff to put up there along with a candle
- Congratulations you now are working with 7 demons and they are all very needy
- Belphie will use that as an excuse to take a nap with him all the time
- “Your doing this in devotion to me cmooooon”
- They all will use that card with you actually lmao good luck
- “Mc! Come watch this anime with me! Your doing it in worship of me so you have to😌”
- Mammon had run that excuse dry bc sir doing your homework does not count as a devotional activity 🙄😒
- Lucifer will brag that it was fate that you were brought to him
- Will also pretend that he chose you on purpose knowing damn well he didn’t 😂
- “But of course I had to choose you, I knew you were the best option.”
- You literally didn’t even look at the name on the paper 😭😭
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monsterblogging · 21 days
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So, it finally clicked that while the average person does in fact broadly comprehend that people are neither good nor evil - they're good and bad, and have free will - they also can't understand why some people would fully commit themselves to completely awful causes or to being a terrible person throughout their entire lives. They can't really picture how this works, because they can't imagine themselves choosing to die on a hill of Being A Terrible Person.
This void in their comprehension is where the myth of the Ontologically Evil Person is very likely to come and settle in sooner or later, because it seems to finally provide an answer that makes sense of otherwise senseless cruelty and violence. Agonizing questions like "Why would my boyfriend spend so much energy on making me feel like shit and breaking me down?" "Why would this historical figure decided to kill all of these people?" and "Why would this guy go start a cult and murder everyone?" are finally given an answer, and the formerly-bewildered person finally has some peace of mind.
Because of this, the myth of the Ontologically Evil Person is incredibly hard to get out of people's minds once it takes root. For one thing, bad ideas are like bad habits; it doesn't really work to tell people to Just Stop With Them, because without something else to take its place? They're going to fall back on it.
And if somebody's been traumatized from abuse? The last thing they want to hear is that they're basically dehumanizing their abuser and that's not cool, because it feels to them like the other person is taking their abuser's side and telling them to get fucked. Even if this not what's happening, the survivor's brain is currently operating on fight/flight/fawn/freeze mode, and a brain operating fight/flight/freeze/fawn mode is keyed to making snap decisions to try and remove you from the danger as soon as possible, which means categorizing everything into black and white. This person couldn't care less about the history of eugenics right now; literally all they care about is being safe.
"Okay, so if the Ontologically Evil Person doesn't exist, how the hell do you explain those fuckers over there?" some of you are probably asking.
Here's the deal. Literally every human being alive can and will do terrible things if they're sufficiently scared and desperate. They're in no position to appreciate that nearly all asshole behavior can be explained by a lack of critical social and self-management skills, or by a lack of access to self-improvement (including being too traumatized to trust means of self-improvement).
People who are scared, insecure, and under high levels of stress will often cling to anything that makes them feel better, because they want to feel safe and secure and not in psychological and/or physical agony. (Stress does an absolute number on your body, too.)
Being reliant on a shitty behavior, belief system, or product for some measure of feeling secure and safe is how you get people saying things like "If I didn't act mean, everyone would just walk all over me!" or "I was really depressed before I found this, so if I gave it up I'm going to get depressed again, and I might hurt myself." (And there might be some truth to this one! This might indeed happen if they give it up cold turkey, and without finding an alternative!) It's how you get people conducting """scientific""" studies to """prove""" that their bigotry is totally justified and not at all irrational. ("Well of course these people are genetically inferior, they wouldn't be poor and disease-ridden if they weren't... what do you mean, systemic inequality and uneven healthcare access? No that's obviously fake and made up by More Bad People.")
People also act in unhealthy ways to deal with personal insecurities implanted by parents or society. You have people out there whose parents drummed it into their heads that second place was for worthless losers, or that no one would love them if they didn't look or act a certain way. You have people who absorbed the idea that acknowledging the basic humanity of shitty people means that they have to forgive them and personally help them get better and just suffer through the abuse in the meantime.
This is how people choose to die on the hill of Being A Terrible Person. They weren't ontologically evil. They were scared, and they thought they saw a fortress on the top of that hill that would keep them (and perhaps also their loved ones) safe.
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satoruoo · 5 months
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VIA VIA VIA HEAR ME OUT. secret santa b they get u and accidentally spill it / the big reveal…
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(NOT SO) SECRET SANTA - aki hayawaka
summary: despite aki's best efforts to keep your gift a secret, his (stupid) roommates somehow manage to spoil the surprise.
genre: fluff, non-devil au, everyone is happy, crack
warnings: swearing, denji, f!reader, suggestive
notes: hope u like it babe !! this is my apology for the recent aki slander 😈🔥
now playing: rockin' around the christmas tree - brenda lee
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"for the millionth time, do not tell [name] i got her, understood?"
denji and power sit crossed-legged on the floor, looking only half interested in what aki is saying. they're dressed in christmas gear from head to toe, heads swaying slightly to the christmas music coming from the record player.
power looks awfully happy with the pair of antlers that denji unwillingly brought her from the store after she threatened to throw a fit in the middle of the aisle. they're decorated with little bells, and every time she nods her head, aki can visibly tell how delighted she is from the jingles that they make. she now refuses to take them off.
denji's gone for a more traditional approach, sporting a santa hat with a light up pom pom at the end.
(the hat also says "ho! ho! ho!" if the button on the left is pressed, but denji had overused it so much that aki cut it open and took out the speaker. he then burnt the speaker. denji was told told it must have broken.)
"duh, i ain’t a snitch!" denji claims, saluting his roommate with a shit-eating grin. he would snitch, aki is fully aware of that. bribe him with a lollipop or a tit squeeze? done deal.
"why are we not allowed to tell her?" power asks, fiddling with rudolph's nose on her christmas jumper.
aki audibly groans, fingers working at his temples in exasperation. "because, it’s a secret santa. we aren’t supposed to tell anyone who we got."
power's face twists in mild disgust, "what is the point of that?! just give me my present now!"
aki rolls his eyes, raking his fingers through his dark hair, "because it builds the suspense, power. do you want to have all your gifts now and have none on christmas day?"
she seems to quieten at that, closing her eyes as she mulls over his words. after three agonizing seconds of her silence and aki wondering whether it'd be easier to just throw himself out of the nearest window, power pouts and nods.
denji dramatically sighs before aki can say anything further, slapping her twice on the back in an attempt to comfort her, "i feel ya, powey."
the girl mirrors the sigh, slumping against denji as she flips aki off with a scowl.
"you should thank me, human! i will not go and tell [name] that you have her!" she declares smugly, resting her body weight on the male next to her.
aki vaguely hears "ow, fuck! power, y’re crushin’ me! how the fuck are ya so heavy?!" and a loud slap that probably came from power as he walks away.
• . ✿ ° × . *.
aki really does try his hardest to keep the secret.
he finds himself slapping a hand over denji's mouth when he almost lets it spill, and shoving a piece of food into power's when the topic of the secret santa comes up.
it's only halfway through december. he doesn't know how much longer he can keep this up. he can tell you're starting to pick up on something fishy and it's beginning to stress him out.
"and so aki has-"
"what are you doing?"
power freezes up at the sound of aki's voice, head lifting from your lap as she scrambles to defend herself.
"nothing!" she says a pitch higher than usual.
your eyes narrow at aki who sends a subtle glare in power's direction before taking a seat beside you on the couch. you're immediately taking his hand in yours, rubbing the pad of your thumb over his knuckles to soothe his anger.
the man melts so quickly that it should be embarrassing, shoulders relaxing with a simple touch.
"she was telling me about secret santa," you fill in gently, "something about who everyone has."
power wishes she was dead.
the glare that aki gives her makes certain that she'll be banned from chocolates for at least a week. that's practically the same as death.
"was she now?" aki asks, an angry rumble in his throat.
the girl is looking at anything but his face; when had the wall become so interesting? look at that, is that a new vase? what are denji's pornos doing on the floor-
"why don't you tell both of us, power?"
before anything else can be said, she shoots up from her spot on the couch sweating bullets.
"meowy needs to shit!" is all she says before leaving the room at hurricane speeds. (if only she were that quick to close her mouth.)
you smile, turning to look at your boyfriend with a raised eyebrow.
"so?" you question, idly threading your fingers through his.
"so, what?" aki responds.
he can tell from the way a small laugh escapes those pretty lips that playing dumb isn't going to work.
"nothing, just a bad day." he tries, resting his head in the crook of your neck.
"you're snapping at power because of a 'bad day'?" you state, scepticism evident in your tone. "righhhht."
aki chuckles into your flesh, placing a chaste kiss there before pulling away. "yeah, that's all."
you press a kiss to his lips, tongue swiping over his. "sure, okay. i'll let you have this one, handsome."
the edges of his mouth tip up at the nickname and silent relief fills his veins at the clarification that you won't push the matter.
"thanks, love."
• . ✿ ° × . *.
aki swears on his life that he tries his hardest to keep the secret.
it's just that denji and power are not good secret keepers. they're a pair of loudmouths who are easily bribed. if not for your presence to keep him sane, aki's sure he would have strangled denji and confiscated power's antlers. actually, he's sure that if the gift he'd gotten you wasn't so important, he'd have let his roommates tell you already.
"makima, c'monnnn! i licked the floor so ya owe me a tit squeeze!" denji whines in a kneeling position on the floor.
going out for christmas lunch with you, his two roommates and makima may be one of the best and worst decisions aki's ever made in his life.
power still has her antlers on with a scarf wrapped tightly around her neck, you had to persuade her to wear it, as she makes fun of her friend. there are still remnants of the snowball fight he was forced to engage in on her coat, and her nose is pink from the one denji threw in her face.
denji is as desperate as ever - shame didn't seem to find a place in his vocabulary. his purposefully broken santa hat is still finding a home atop his dirty blonde hair, though the pom pom looks like it's about to give up and fall off.
you on the other hand look ethereal in his eyes, a smile etched into your gorgeous features. with every small giggle that escapes your lips, aki feels his chest constrict almost painfully, heart thumping loudly within his ribcage.
you're still holding his hand; you have been for the past three hours.
"only if you tell me who aki has for secret santa, denji." makima answers, voice silky smooth.
it's meant as a joke 100%. everyone else in the room, even power, understood the joke. curse aki for forgetting denji's inability to read social cues.
"he has [name]!!"
on december 23rd, the day before christmas eve, denji tells makima who he has for secret santa in exchange for a tit squeeze. typical.
there's silence for a while. no one really knows what to say. all eyes are on the dark-haired male who genuinely seems to be in the middle of a breakdown.
denji's all frozen up and fully ready to make a run for it if needs be.
"i already know he has me, though." you say, confused.
comically, multiple heads whip towards you.
"...you do?" aki breathes, annoyance towards denji disappearing as fast as it came.
"well if you didn't already know, you suck at keeping secrets, honey. i've known for ages."
part of him feels relieved. if you already knew, then technically he didn't fuck up. technically, it didn't even count-
"it doesn't take a genius to figure it out, you know."
"for real, bro. i knew ya sucked ass like in general but not at lying as well-"
denji will be dead by morning.
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BONUS:
"your secret santa gift was an engagement ring?" power asks, mortified.
"what a shitty gift!" denji pipes up, "it's not even edible- ow!"
you chuckle, fiddling with the ring that fits perfectly around your finger as aki smacks denji's arm.
"really? i think it's a wonderful gift." you muse, "it'll last way longer than food."
"so what?! food stays in your tummy forever!" power argues with her hand pointing at her stomach.
"no the fuck it doesn't! ya shit it out, duh!"
their bickering falls upon deaf ears as aki steals a sneaky kiss from you.
"merry christmas, [name]. i hope we'll spend many more together." his cheeks are definitely not dusted pink as he says that. not at all.
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maximotts · 1 year
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𝙻𝚎𝚜𝚜𝚘𝚗 𝚃𝚠𝚘; 𝙰 𝙱𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚏 𝙷𝚒𝚜𝚝𝚘𝚛𝚢 𝚘𝚏 𝙲𝚘𝚗𝚏𝚕𝚒𝚌𝚝
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a/n: Wanda, you sweet baby bean, I'm sorry people suck. That's all I've gotta say about this chapter uhm... please don't yell at me too much, I promise it's all going to be So Fine
✎— priest's daughter!Wanda x college student!reader
✎— confessions AU; a surprise over lunch leads you to spend a lot more time with Wanda. You like her and she does as well, but not everyone is happy about your new friend
✎— warnings: this is an 18+ series, minors DNI; I've said before since turning this into a series we're going to have a slower, more subtle corruption kink so: mentions of handsiness/groping, Wanda being a shy yearning gay, R being a terrible student, bullying, jealousy, Wanda shedding a tear because my friends seem to think I need to make that a warning
✎— words: 5.5k
series masterlist. || main masterlist.
Even with your lunch offer, Wanda couldn’t bring herself to let you do all the work; after picking up sandwiches from her favorite deli, she directed you down the block to her -and apparently, your- apartment building. When realization set in, the two of you had a laugh until you suggested going to your unit. 
“You’re serious?”
“What, afraid I’m luring you into my apartment to have my way with you?” Wanda didn’t respond to that, just shook her head as you quickly discovered she did whenever she was talking herself out of a thought. Oh what you’d give to see what was running through that imagination. “Such a good girl, not trusting strangers, but I don’t bite, I promise. We can go to yours instead?” 
She had to have told you her apartment number along the way because you’d gotten there with ease, guiding her down the hall with a hand on her back, but two simple words made her forget the whole walk. Wanda was a good kid, an amazing student, she’d heard words of encouragement so many times over the years— none of it affected her how it had earlier. 
If you noticed her nerves, you were gracious enough not to point them out even as she carelessly dropped her bag to the floor and ran to the bathroom, shutting the door tight. Wanda calmed herself with a splash of water and a quick talking to, reminding to keep it together. This wasn’t a date, it wasn’t anything, it was lunch. All this meant was you were a decent enough human not to stoop to the level of an overgrown schoolyard bully and feeling bad doesn’t make them a friend. Certainly didn’t mean she had a chance with you. 
That rationale didn’t stop her from talking out her nerves in the form of oversharing.
From that, you learned a lot about Wanda. She’s a twin, the younger one as her brother Pietro so often loved to remind her. They were close, but when it came time to choose colleges, he decided on another university in the next state over— mostly because of a very generous track scholarship he was offered. She nearly went with him, wanting to take advantage of their massive literature program, but their father said it’d break his heart if both of them left and Wanda, darling daughter that she is, caved and attended a more local school. 
Part of her compromise was being allowed her apartment. Leaving home to live off-campus by herself was an instant no, but for once, Wanda pushed. It was around the same cost of any room and board fees and she had the freedom she insisted on having. Partially to live away from home, but mostly because the possibility of rooming with one of her childhood enemies was high and she’d rather go without college than deal with that stress.
“I raised such a fuss that night, Pietro thought I’d lost my mind. It’s worth it, I think. I like it here.” Here in what turned out to be your shared building, blaming different schedules on why you’d never run into the other. In the end, her dad could rarely hold firm against Wanda’s puppy dog eyes and constant pleas and she won the small space now filled with various plants and cozy furnishings.
“Well, I for one, am very happy to find out the cute girl I’ve been wanting to talk to only lives a few floors away.” You said it so casually, like it was easy as chewing your ham and cheese sandwich to call her cute. It wasn’t helping that she’s just being nice mantra Wanda had going in her head to keep her calm.
While you ate, Wanda searched for any other reason you’d be so flirtatious and came up empty. Still, she couldn’t discount her inexperience for how she perceived your wanting to have lunch, your compliments, even the comment about asking her to dinner could’ve just been a passing joke she hung on to too seriously. She’d never been allowed to date, not that it mattered with how she got treated like the plague, and she didn’t know the first thing about well, anything. Somehow Pietro fared much better in that sense, sneaking out and rebelling any chance he could. 
Some nights when she couldn’t sleep, Wanda would catch him stumbling out of the woods that bordered their backyard and tired as she was, helped him climb through the window, questioning him all the while about his disheveled clothes and the glittery lip gloss smeared along his neck. “Stop being dad’s golden child and maybe you’ll find out one day.” Wanda never was bold enough to try nor did she like the options to try with. None of her classmates were interesting enough to be worth getting in trouble for.
The few times she did go out, the situation got the better of her and she had more anxiety than rowdiness. Wanda tried, really she did, there was just so much to remember: how to drink, who to drink with, the perfect things to say and no matter what, she always came up short. Then came that dreadful night after junior prom; her fatal mistake— distressed to the point of tears, Wanda called her father to pick her up, not thinking how not parent-approved the activities swirling around were. His appearance and the subsequent adult discourse at church the next morning solidified her status as Westview’s pious snitch. Ultimately, as much as she hated talking about it, even after Pietro took her side and offered to take matters into his own hands, she didn’t regret it for one day.
Opportunities to act out quickly dropped to zero after that incident. College was supposed to be better, new people and new surroundings, maybe a whole new her if she could figure out how to upgrade, but the proximity to her hometown made the past three years an extended high school. And then, there you were, shiny and brand new, straight out of her prayers— but they got to you first. 
Wanda resigned herself to staring at you in class, watching you text under the table with Carol Danvers who’d given you her number almost as soon as you’d first sat in your chair. If you’d been in the front of the class, she’d have slipped you her number instead; that’s what she told herself at least. Everyone else was too fast and forward, and Wanda didn’t stand a chance when everyone’s classes overlapped as much as they did. Each time Wanda caught you looking back at her, she turned away so fast she missed your smile or the silent waves you tried sending her way, too afraid to see if you’d regard her with the same disdain your new acquaintances offered. 
There weren’t a lot of people in class today; the middle of the semester meant burn out was creeping in, students skipped more now, but you were there in your usual spot, empty seats all around. If you weren’t always cutting your arrival so short, Wanda could’ve moved next to you, but class began and, not wanting to disrupt, she stayed put. Those next ninety minutes were the most distracted she’d been her entire college career, solidifying exactly how she’d introduce herself, act cool and collected while she gave you her handwritten phone number, written and rejected countless times over so Wanda could draw the little heart at the end just right. She’d been so close too, just feet away from your desk; Brock always had a way of ruining even her best laid plans.
“Earth to Wanda, where’d you go?”
“Huh?” The poor girl had been staring much too intently at her crumpled sandwich wrapper for the last few minutes, having decided she wasn’t listening when she didn’t react after your suggestion to run away and buy an RV. Wanda was adorable when she zoned off, playing with her rings absentmindedly and spinning them around her fingers, but you did wonder where she flew off to. “Sorry, I got distracted.”
“Clearly…” Gathering any lingering trash gave Wanda a task away from your watchful gaze, wiping off the table with another mumbled apology before skipping off to the kitchen. She took a deep breath, steadying herself against what to do now that she’d gotten this far. Her plan only went as far as exchanging phone numbers, maybe putting the digits in your phone if she was brave enough, but you’d skipped that stage and gotten straight to the apartment hangouts and she was… lost. 
Luckily for Wanda, you had no problem taking charge. The moment she returned to the living room, you took hold of her arm and pulled her down until she was finally sitting right next to you instead of her far off spot. All of lunch she’d been far away and selfishly, you missed how close you’d been when you walked earlier. Now with Wanda’s thigh brushing against yours, you could see each one of her little reactions intimately. “What’s going on in that head?”
“I was thinking about earlier and got carried away, nothing important.” Wanda shook her head again, hoping to settle at least a fraction of the blush that’d overtaken her face, but when she tried to pull her hand away from yours, you held tight. As much as she loved the feeling of your warm, steady hand wrapped around her cold and shaky one, Wanda feared growing too used to it too fast and having to fight not seeking out your touch from then on.
“If it’s got you this frazzled, it’s gotta be some kind of important. You can tell me, I promise.” You almost wondered aloud who you’d tell, but she didn’t need to be reminded of who you talked to. Not that you’d ever say anything, no, mostly you just wanted to see Wanda all sweet and flustered, committing the sight to memory on the off chance she kept her distance after today. 
She stared hard, judging your sincerity before deciding whether or not she’d lie or divulge the truth. Unpracticed as she was with this, Wanda wasn’t an idiot; this afternoon was nice, but she couldn’t blurt out her crush only a few hours after your first official meeting. She could tell half-truths, thoughts buzzing in her brain that ranked lower on the exposure scale to hopefully not scare you away. “Well.. you know how I tried talking to you in class?” 
You nodded, politely letting her continue, and Wanda bit the inside of her cheek, trying painfully hard not to think about your thumb rubbing over the back of her hand. It was a small gesture, obviously, but it meant everything to Wanda who’d never been on the receiving end of such gentle reassurance. “I’d been waiting to do that since the first week of class.”
So you weren’t imagining her sneaking glances at each class; good to know you could still sense when someone was into you. Most girls tended to talk way before Wanda did and you started wondering if your attraction to her made her small acknowledgments into something a lot bigger than it actually was. “Why didn’t you?”
“Someone else always got there first.” The truth was embarrassing. As isolated as Wanda had been, she didn’t actively dislike most of her peers. It was that one particular group you hung out with that seemed to go out of their way to not only make Wanda’s life hell, but also warn anyone they possibly could away from ever giving her a chance. She grew up being taught hateful behavior only bred more hate, that it wasn’t polite or productive, but if there was anyone she hated, it was them.
When she saw you with Brock and Carol and the rest of their tiring friend group, she nearly cursed aloud, strangely mad that of all the transfers, they had to get you too— it wasn’t fair. In her defense, Wanda gave ignoring you a good, honest try, but every time she saw you wander through the door, she wanted to be the one who waved you over, who sat with you and leaned in close or put a flirtatious little kiss on your cheek. “You seemed..busy.” 
Finally, once the jealousy threatened to consume her alive, she did change course, ignoring you wasn’t working so why not try talking? Worst case scenario, you tell her to shoo or get lost; painful, but nothing she hadn’t heard before. When she heard Brock talking about her, the brunette swore she felt her heart drop into her stomach, any hope she had of possibly getting close to you just… dashed in an instant. She had to pack her stuff quickly, not because she was afraid, but because she felt so embarrassed she knew she’d cry if she heard another word of that conversation. 
“I’m not stupid, I know they talk about me. They don’t really try to hide how they feel.” Wanda’s laugh held a bitter edge, laced with the defeat of someone who knew what to expect when trying to make new friends. “I just- I didn’t want to interfere or get you involved with any of their weird… whatever and.. I don’t know, it didn’t seem like it’d go over well to talk to you when you’re already friends with them.”
At first you laughed, disbelieving Wanda could ever think you were off limits just because you’d spent a month or so interacting with people who, admittedly, weren’t the greatest, but one look at Wanda’s troubled face showed she was all too serious. “I can talk to more than one person, you know!” 
You weren’t the type to blindly follow everything someone said, preferring to make your own judgements, and after a few hours with Wanda you could tell that, just as expected, she truly wasn’t as bad as everyone made her out to be. Shy and reserved, sure, but you couldn’t count those as bad qualities. Not when she was just as gentle, funny, and kind as you’d imagined she’d be. 
“It’s always more than just one person talking or inviting you somewhere or shoving their phone in your face asking you to text them…” The last part was mumbled, but you caught it all the same. Her earlier confirmed watching combined with that last comment had the last piece sliding into place so perfectly in your head, you’re sure you heard a snap. 
Wanda didn’t just want to say hi, she wanted what she saw; flirtatious texts, low-spoken promises of naughty after class activities— not that Wanda knew that’s what she was asking for. Sweet thing… you’d show her how it all worked.
“Can I tell you a secret?” You beckoned her closer with a finger and she leant in with innocent curiosity, shivering as you came to whisper in her ear. “I’d rather text you so I’d like your number, if you don’t mind.”
It was the truth; sure you messed around with one of two girls since being here, but none of them stopped you wanting the darling girl in front of you. The longer you sat with her, the more you wanted to know and not just to sleep with her. Not that Wanda would probably let you right away; she didn’t have to say it for you to know she was virginal as a little lamb.
Your lips brushed against her cheek, the barest hint of a kiss, but it stunned Wanda all the same. She pulled back, searching for her phone much more intently than needed to play off how affected she really was. “Does that mean you want to have lunch again?”
“I want to do a lot more than just have lunch with you but..” Eventually you gave Wanda your own phone to give the poor girl something to do where she was not so subtly scrambling. When she handed you hers, you punched your number in and as she took it back, you watched her sign your name off with a set of hearts. How precious. “Yes, if you want to?”
Wanda agreed perhaps a little too eagerly, but she couldn’t stop herself planning your next lunch date complete with food she made herself. She really hoped you liked homemade things. “Absolutely!”
♡.﹀﹀﹀﹀.♡
And so it went like that for the following weeks, walking around campus with Wanda and having lunch together when you were both free, going to her apartment multiple times a week to collaborate on school things or just to talk to her. Whatever you were doing, Wanda was a pleasure to be around and she never complained when you copied her answers on homework or came over just to lay on her couch and watch movies.
For Wanda’s part, she might as well have been in heaven; having someone to spend time with regularly was nicer than she remembered. Of course, growing up, she had Pietro, but this was different. You made her laugh just as much as he did, but you didn’t torment her nearly as much, and the big difference, obviously, was that she most certainly did not want to kiss her brother. 
When she showed up to your apartment door with a box of heart-shaped sandwiches, she felt silly, but the moment your face lit up when you laid eyes on them… she wanted to drop the food and kiss you until you fell to the floor.
But she’d always wanted her first kiss to be special, memorable and at least pleasant; it couldn’t be over a stupid sandwich in a doorway. So Wanda waited until.. well, until she felt the time was right to politely ask.
You made her nervous, not in the frightened way others had, but with a giddy, butterflies in her stomach feeling that left Wanda always wanting more. If you’d asked Wanda a few months ago, she’d say her ideal romance was to be blissfully swept off her feet like she’d seen in movies, brought flowers, chocolates, and lovingly courted until she finally says yes— meeting you through all of that out her balcony window. For the first time in her life, Wanda wanted what she’d seen her peers get ever since hormones descended over her sixth grade class. She craved casually possessive hugs and touches, that anticipated first kiss… special private time she’d stumbled upon during late-night internet browsing.
The first one thankfully Wanda didn’t have to wait for. 
Startling as it was the next day when you not only walked with Wanda to class, but traded your spot in the back of the class to coax her to sit off to the side, she didn’t complain. How could she when you insisted sitting next to her made class more bearable; whether it was true or not, Wanda couldn’t know, but she didn’t care, the compliment made her blush every time.
A chair next to the top student should’ve meant you paid more attention, but it was the opposite. Before you’d watched Wanda from afar, now with her close, you couldn’t help but stare longer, much more intrigued with how she bit her tongue whenever she concentrated than anything your professors taught. 
Even more since you’d begun vying for her attention during class, Wanda liked to ask questions of them after lectures were done, getting clarification for anything she couldn’t pick up in the discussion. Jokingly, you called her a nerd, but you took her notes to study from all the same so you figured the least you could do was hang back and wait for her— the perfect opportunity for Carol to strike up a conversation. 
“She wheeled you right on in, didn’t she?” The blonde also went to school with Wanda and while she wasn’t ever directly antagonistic towards your new friend, she’d never made an effort to include her either. To you Carol was nice enough; if you were being honest, you hadn’t given it much thought whenever you fell into bed with her.
Hanging out with Wanda meant abandoning your typical seat next to Carol in your Wednesday morning class and while you missed her sharp banter and the silly drawings she snuck in the corners of your notebooks, nothing beat sliding your arm around Wanda and toying with her skirt under the desk. She didn’t fully know what you were up to, grew squirmy as she felt the room’s chill on her thighs, but even when you pinched at her hips, Wanda didn’t want to cause a class disruption by protesting. 
Not that you and Carol hadn’t done the same, but Wanda’s reactions were so pure and sweet, just like her. Carol was fun, but Wanda was something else entirely and you actually wanted to get to know her. The brunette was easy to be around in a way you couldn’t remember experiencing and where Wanda didn’t go out of her way to mention your first friend group, you didn’t miss the judgemental looks Carol shot Wanda’s way whether the brunette’s back was turned or not.  “It’s easy when you’re not an asshole. Try it sometime.”
She brushed off your comment, sliding further in your line of sight until she blocked your view of Wanda at the podium. What you two shared might’ve not been serious, but losing your situationship to someone like Wanda was an ego hit Carol refused to believe was actually real. “I’m having a party on Saturday. You’re coming.” 
“Guess I’ll cancel my plans…” The singular party of Carol’s you’d been to was a riot. Admittedly, you didn’t remember much besides large hits from shared pre-rolls and waking up in her bed the next morning with a pleasurable ache between your legs, but even after stumbling back to your apartment with a throbbing headache, you were more than excited at the prospect of going to another. Coincidentally, that particularly reckless night was days before you first talked to Wanda and now, only a few weeks later, you hesitated. 
“Is anyone invited?” You searched over Carol’s shoulder to find Wanda still chatting away, dutifully scribbling down something your professor was referring to. You couldn’t imagine she’d be upset if you went at all; Wanda might even appreciate a Saturday night to herself after you’d wormed your way into her plans week after week. It was you who didn’t want to go to the party without her.
Both of you knew the singular ‘anyone’ you were referring to, and Carol’s expression soured. “I said I’m having a party, not bible study.” 
Sam walked over then, the large guy you’d met at orientation having also made fast friends with the people who threw the best after hours get-togethers. He was nice enough, louder than his roommate Steve, but always a fun time. “Come on, Danvers, she can’t be that bad. Besides, isn’t her dad like, an hour away now?” 
Word really did travel fast on this campus. Even new kids retained personal facts about the girl who didn’t know the first thing about them, but Sam was another one who hadn’t bought into the group verdict on Wanda and for that, you were grateful. If you did bring Wanda along, you thankfully wouldn’t be the only one looking out for her. Not that you planned on letting her out of your sight. “I doubt she’d call the police.”
“Doesn’t sound like something I’d want to chance.” She wouldn’t get grounded like she had back in high school, but violating the lease on the house she and her friends rented wasn’t in the cards either. Catching sight of Wanda making her way back over to where the three of you gathered, she nudged your shoulder and you felt a heavy lump in your throat. The last thing you wanted was to be caught talking about her, much less make her believe you were plotting anything malicious. 
Carol was well aware of your growing soft spot in the past few weeks, taking note how you instantly shifted focus away from Wanda whenever someone dared bring her up in your presence; it’d almost be sweet if she didn’t hate her. And so, instead of cutting the chat short, Carol waited until she was sure Wanda was within earshot, “If she ruins anything, it’s on you.” 
Wanda, reticent as she was, strolled right up to you with a smile, but your stunned face made her brow furrow. She knew she’d been the topic of conversation, both having caught the tail end of Carol’s conditions and gauging the apprehension you regarded her with. 
“Look who it is, missionary of the hour…” Carol mumbled, Sam only getting a fraction of his snicker out before you shut him up with a warning glare. 
With a nervous breath, you tried playing it off, but the blonde’s icy temperament was impossible to mask, “We were just talking about this thing Carol’s got going on Saturday, but it’s a party so…”
Wanda nodded, ignoring the other woman completely, which only made her stew further. Honestly whatever was said wouldn’t be anything new; she did have a terrible reputation for disrupting parties and she was far past expecting to be wanted there. The hesitation didn’t bother her, but Carol did; if she could come out on top just once, she’d die happy. 
So this time, instead of being forced to watch Carol flirt with you and exchange texts in class, Wanda was the one who’d spent hours getting to know you and the last lecture blushing through your teasing, pushing you away when you got too handsy, giggling into her hands when you told her something especially funny; she knew, on some undescribed level, you liked her better. 
Maybe that’s where the confidence to link her arm with yours and press a chaste kiss into your temple stemmed from, “Well, I love parties! We have to go!”
If your eyes weren’t already wide enough to fall out of your head, they certainly were now. The blonde’s eyes narrowed, darting between the two of you while Sam, loud as ever, laughed at the clear and present tension between the two women on either side of you. “Last thing: Don’t let her wear anything like…” Carol gestured to Wanda, dressed in a light floral dress and one of her favorite cozy sweaters, “that. I’m not having a church social.”
Wanda’s grip loosened at the insult, brief confidence struck down as fast as it’d come, but you didn’t let her fall away completely, winding your arms around her midsection. “I told her she should wear this sweater today. But don’t worry, she’ll look even cuter than she normally does.” Scooting the stunned girl closer until she was snug between your legs, you kissed her cheek and gave her a squeeze of reassurance. 
When Wanda didn’t move a singular muscle, shoulders still slumped, you wished there was a hug tight enough to say I’m sorry I let them hurt you again. “See you Saturday!”
You never did thrive amidst conflict, preferring to sit back and let any drama go by far away from you, but it wasn’t fair staying silent when Wanda could barely stand up for herself. Whether it was your defense of Wanda’s outfit choice or your protective hold you kept, your defense was enough to get Carol to roll her eyes and back off for now, “Fine whatever, I’ll text you the details later.” 
Sam left you with a pat on the back, shaking his head at the tension he happened to stumble in on and couldn’t wait to tell Steve and Bucky, “Way to stand up for your girl, kiddo, well done.”
“Don’t call me kiddo! You’re maybe six months older than me, and she’s not my— fuck, whatever.” He was jogging out the door before you could correct him, but you dropped your arms anyway and Wanda tried to ignore the loss she felt. She longed to admit she needed at minimum five more minutes of that hug to truly keep her tears at bay, but she couldn’t ask. 
It was bad enough you had to lie about picking her sweater; Wanda threw it on not only because it kept her warm in the often chilly lecture halls, but Pietro bought it for her years ago for her birthday and the familiar fabric kept her calm. She wore the sweater and her current dress often enough for the outfit to be considered a wardrobe staple, Carol saw it constantly; there was no way she didn’t know how pointed her insult was. “Sorry about that…”
Wanda half expected you to run after Carol, trying to smooth things over with her for the sake of preserving whatever you two had that Wanda threatened. Instead she found her hand loosely caught in yours, thumb rubbing over it just as you had the first day she shared her anxieties, and when dim green eyes traveled from your touch to your face, she saw concern so genuine Wanda wanted to fall back into your arms and sob. Not only for herself, but for you and how much of a burden she feared she was already becoming. Her family always dubbed her the crybaby and she couldn’t deny it; of the three of them, Wanda was the first to let her eyes go watery. The only thing worse than dealing with what you’d just witnessed would be having to console the crying mess of your new friend.
But you wouldn’t have minded, not one bit. “Don’t apologize when you didn’t do anything wrong. That’s not fair,”  You spotted her frown and longed to ask her what you could do to help, but as soon as you opened your mouth, Wanda pulled away.
She was quick to replace her sad expression with another smile, pushing your forgotten books into your now empty hands. If you didn’t watch her so much, the sudden change wouldn’t mean anything, but the smile she was trying so hard to pass off didn’t reach her eyes— it wasn’t real. “You’re going to be late for class again, get moving.” 
“Well yeah, but…” Clearly, Wanda was deflecting again, you’d be a fool to miss the nervous way she hugged herself tight as if she could hide the knee length dress she’d walked out of her apartment in so happily just hours ago. Choosing the sweater wasn’t a lie, but what you thought about her look wasn’t; Wanda dressed in a comfortable yet sweet style you found wholly endearing. “Are you alright? I didn’t mean for all that to happen, I only wanted to ask if I could bring you along.”
The brunette scoffed loudly and in the interest of not making the situation any worse, you ignored how her voice cracked, “I’m fine, don’t worry about me.”
“Right okay, I just- I’ll see you later then? If you’re up for it?” If Wanda didn’t want to talk about it now, maybe this afternoon she’d be up to discuss and unfortunately, she was right. You only had about ten minutes now to rush across the courtyard to your next lecture; no time to argue with her. It was too early in the semester to routinely skip all of your classes.
Wanda joined you to the door, hands tight around her backpack strap. The walk was short, too short; you hated leaving her to fend for herself when she was obviously still upset. You’d make it up to her later, maybe ask her favorite movie and bring over pizza to watch it with her. For now, resolved to be on time, you left her with a hurried wave and a clumsy sprint that admittedly did make her chuckle just a little, “You know where to find me!” 
With you gone, tears pricked at the corners of her eyes and Wanda wiped them away with the knit sleeve of the sweater she couldn’t stand wearing right now. It was too cold out to only have her shoulders exposed, but she tore it off anyways, bundling it as small as she could in her clammy palms. 
She walked briskly, destination clear, but for once, she wasn’t going home. Any other time, Wanda would’ve been polite enough to text ahead and assure she was welcome, but the harder it got to hold back a full cry, the less she worried about etiquette. If anyone could tell her what to do, how to proceed, anything… it was them. 
From the class schedules they’d shared with her at the beginning of the year, they should be in; Wanda hoped their ‘you’re welcome whenever you want some company, no questions asked’ sentiment held true just this once.
The route home seemed endless, late summer breezes stinging her blotched cheeks; she looked a mess and she knew it, her frazzled appearance driving her to practically run down her apartment floor hall. Wanda knocked on the door just a few doors down from her own, the one she hated to bother but loved being in all the same, “I know it’s the middle of the day, but I really need your help, please?”
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tsuunara · 3 months
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,, BSD FANDOM STOP FUCKING MISCHARACTERIZING CHUUYA FOR ONE SECOND CHALLENGE
i need to get this out of my head because i can't do this anymore with ppl who mischaracterize chuuya so much
tw ; opinion and lots of stormbringer and 15 spoilers! i think it's safe to put that here (also sorry for my poor wording of this i'm trying my best here sob sob justice for chuuya!!!)
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"chuuya would be a red flag in relationships because he has incredible anger issues and gets violent!"
,, what a bullshit statement LOL i'm (not) sorry for saying this but i really don't think chuuya has any anger issues whatsoever?? NOW JUST HEAR ME OUT FOR A SECOND being short-tempered ≠ having anger issues!!! ,, having anger issues is something you CAN'T control and causes you to say or do things that can cause harm to others. chuuya does NOT have anger issues!!! we relatively don't see chuuya taking his anger out towards ANYONE with NO CONTROL over his actions whatsoever (arahabaki excluded, it's literally a god of destruction)
,, "but he takes it out on dazai!! he fought with him!!"
,, chuuya mentions that it was to SPITE him. when dazai and chuuya are together, i'd say chuuya is more pissed and annoyed because dazai is usually pushing is buttons. he's just a bit short-tempered and loses it a little more easier than others! of course he also does loses his temper a bit whenever he's stressed as well (that one cannibalism arc episode!!! where he said "son of a bitch") but he didn't particularly go KABOOM KABOOM, ifykwim. ,, we can also see him relatively calm and serious with his work in some episodes too!! he's not yapping and exploding all the time, because obviously he's a 22 year old man. throughout these 7 years, chuuya WOULD'VE learned to mature himself and control his emotions ESPECIALLY after going through his trauma.
,, "but chuuya is violent all the time!"
,, "all the time" ? bffr LMAO. okay sure, chuuya is MAFIA EXECUTIVE and that's part of his job. but that doesn't mean he's always killing this and that!! literally in the official wiki it mentions how chuuya isn't "impossible to reason with" when dealing with his enemies!!
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,, ALSO FURTHER PROOF THAT CHUUYA ISN'T SOME COLD-BLOODED KILLER WHO KILLS EVERYONE HE SEES!! in stormbringer, we're up to the scene where N literally tells chuuya that he wasn't human and literally TORTURES HIM, verlaine - the man who KILLED off all his friends - gets him to kill N. but guess fucking what? CHUUYA DIDN'T!!! he tried to go for verlaine instead!! and he also sympathized with him because he KNEW where he was coming from as well!!
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,, also!! when he was betrayed by the sheep in the 15 arc, dazai gave chuuya the choice of what to do with them when he was ordered to kill both the sheep and the GSS. and chuuya told him not to kill any of the sheep - most likely due to the fact that he actually still sees them as his family (give this man a break wtf) ,, even if we see chuuya angry at times, at most we can justify his anger - i mean who wouldn't go feral if you had to face the man who killed all your friends or the man who literally killed off your original self, tortured you and told you you weren't human? if anything, it's a very human thing if im being honest. (further proof that chuuya is human) ,, now, bringing back to our bullshit statement - why would chuuya need to get angry or violent if he loves his s/o? chuuya may be a red flag and has his flaws but i REALLY don't see the need for him to take any of his anger out on his s/o. he's really not angry 24/7 all the time, nor does he always NEED to use violence even as being part of the mafia - and just so you know, it's confirmed that chuuya would treat women the best out of everyone!!!! so let's just call it a day and go home guys 🤗🤗🤗
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tldr; there would be no need for chuuya to get angry or violent if he loves his s/o, being a mafia executive does NOT necessarily mean he is violent all the time as he sympathizes with others, chuuya does NOT have anger issues and just loses his temper a little more easier than others (especially when it comes to dazai), and asagiri literally confirms he respects women.
thank you for coming to my ted talk. have a good day, evening or night ^_^
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t3mpest98 · 2 months
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The Coruscant Detective Unit
This was really just a silly little idea I had a while ago and I ran with it. Anyways, I thought I’d share with the masses (tho not sure if anyone will see it akskdk) Be warned, it does contain my personal headcannons on the Corrie’s and their commanders
Shoutout to @varpusvaras who has enabled all of this and helped me figure many things out akdjfj
Commander: CC- 4477 “Thire”
Captains: CT- 6687 “Spade” and CT- 6799 “Noir”
The CDU is a secret unit of Coruscant Guard troopers living deep inside Coruscant. At the beginning of the war when the first clones were assigned to Coruscant, this unit did not exist. It was only about half a year into the war that it was even ever considered, only after the Commanders realized that the CSF handing off cases to them wasn’t just a once in a while thing. That combined with the unrest growing under the surface was something that would only continue to get worse, and eventually affect the Senate if the people down below grew restless enough.
With Fox already busy handling everything at once, overseeing everything that happens on Coruscant, he wasn’t able to be personally responsible for this unit. Thorn, practically being SIC while also handling most of the patrol duties, was also unable to take the responsibility. With Stone off world most of the time it wouldn’t make sense to have him handling a unit of troopers he would never get to see. Thire, being stationed over the prisons and the youngest, therefore having been kept from taking too much at once, offered to take care of it. And so it was decided that Thire would be their commanding officer.
Now the question was, where would they get the troopers? This unit wasn’t supposed to exist and any attempt at asking for it got shot down by Palpatine since “they did not have a need for one. They oversaw Senate security and nothing more”. They had to have multiple troopers to form this group so the process was slow, subtly sneaking troopers declared KIA down to the lower levels one at a time.
Thire can't be there at all times, or at all really, to directly lead any missions so he would need someone to help him. Luckily he had just the trooper for it. Or rather, he had the troopers for it. ARC twins Spade and Noir were then elevated to the status of Captain. The rest of the Guard knew about this but none of the GAR could. No one really wanted to deal with what would come out of that conversation.
Most of the unit's source of supplies comes from whatever they can steal, salvage, and buy (the last being rare). Anything they get from the Guard is used sparingly. With the limited resources all of them have to begin with, the last thing Spade and Noir want is to put more stress on their commander by making Thire figure out where they got everything they needed. They don’t complain even when the shinies get lightheaded or when breathing gets a little harder.
But when it comes to technology and some extra help outside of their capabilities they have a good friend made a couple months after this unit was formed. Her name is Kasai Cyra, a human from Corellia who’s really good at hiding and even better at putting together scrap. She lives on some of the deepest levels of Coruscant, why that is no one knows. She took one look at them and for some reason couldn’t ignore the fact they needed help.
These three combined are a chaotic mess that somehow are able to succeed more often than not. Of course every mission comes with its casualties that the twins have to bury down deep to keep themselves afloat. Neither can remember how long it had been since they’ve cried with how much they blocked out their emotions. Cyra isn’t much better but the main things she blocks out is the overwhelming helplessness. The fear that she’ll be found, that she’ll be killed, that she will lose everything if she isn’t careful enough.
The only way any of them do not get any terrible side effects from a vitamin d deficiency is by helping out those who run the circle of the supplements. In exchange they get gummies that are easier for the whole of the unit to eat (also Noir is picky). The masks they have to help them breathe down there aren’t really top notch either though. Basically everyone is barely surviving.
They (try) to keep as much peace down below as they can, whether that be by taking care of a group that needs to go or striking deals and helping out those that really need it. The entire unit knows that if they see a teenager stealing any kind of necessity on the street, no they didn’t. Life is hard enough for everyone down there as it is and they don’t want to make it worse for those less fortunate.
That’s all I’ll share for now (I have soooo much more but that can come out later after I am ready) but I hope you like it!
Taglist: @homemade-clones @kimiheartblade @the-bad-batch-baroness @thestarwarslesbian @the-toskaverse @techs-stitches @matchademi @shahrezaad @commander-sunshine @orange-twilek-guy @king-chaos-world @wackylurker @dukeoftheblackstar @kairakara101 @tazmbc1 @sunkissedclones @galaxyofjedi
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skunaskitten · 1 year
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The Affair chapter 2
AU: human ceo sukuna x female reader
Contains: fluff, smut, cheating, lying, unfaithful sukuna, falling in love, mentions of gojo and nanami
Summary: Sukuna did all he can to spend as much time with you as he could, even if that ment he had to lie about his true self to you just to keep you close to. It was easy to do this when he wife is gone. But soon all this time with you and the feeling of his heart. Sukuna had to say what was truly in his heart.
Master list of other stories
chapter1 ch2 chapter3
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The next day sukuna went into the office making his morning rounds with his coffee in hand. He stopped by his wife's office and was about to open the door but it was locked. One of his employees walked by him informing him that she didn't come in today. He wondered why.
  He tried to call her but there was no answer. Sukuna went on about his day when his phone started to ring. He thought it could be you but when he saw it was his wife. 
 Being the concerned husband he is he answered it quickly, "hey where are you? You alright?" She sighed and said "yes of course I am alright. I thought you would have seen the email that was sent. I was called to a business trip from a company that wants to make a deal with my part of the company. I will be gone for a week." Sukuna went through his emails and saw the one she was talking about and let out a grunt. 
"Oh and you didn't want to say anything to me about this after I left."
 She hummed with annoyance saying "well I didn't think you cared since you left. So who did you go home with?" "No one. Even if I was with someone it was just a hickey. Or flirting like you did. But I guess have fun on your trip." She smirked and said "have fun with yourself love. When you get lonely just send me pictures. I will be home soon. Goodbye." She hung up on him as he sighed and said "love you too."
 After work sukuna again was feeling stressed and his mind just raced with thoughts of his wife. She didn't even say anything to him about leaving or notified him of what this company does that's taking her on a trip. A lot of business men had their eye on his wife. She is beautiful, sexy and confident in her status. He just didn't feel like she is what he wants for a life partner. Maybe as a business one or a quick fuck but not to have a family.
 As sukuna left work he walked to his car hearing his phone chime then looked at it seeing a message from you and smiled. He checked it seeing a picture of you holding up a plush white tiger with the text 'it reminded me of you because of your tattoos.' Spending his time with you this week should not be so bad he is actually looking forward to being with you. 
 Today you were out with your friends when you sent sukuna the picture of the plush. They looked at you with a giggle seeing the light purple bruising on your neck. "Hey y/n. What is with the hickey?" You looked at them with a blush and tried to cover it with your sweater saying "its nothing." 
"Oh my gosh you had sex!" "Who was the lucky man you slept with?" You heard them asking you questions as you let out a sigh. 
"I uhhh. Slept with sukuna." They begin to squeal and ask you questions. "Give us all the details about him. What does he look like down there?" "Is he big and thick?" 
 You put up your hands saying "hey guys calm down I will talk when we sit down and have lunch."
 When you sat in the food court you told them a few details of sukuna. How his body looked and the tattoos that ran across his upper body. How big he is and how you got the hickies on your neck then the shower you shared with him after. They started to tease you about you and him being in love and wanting to be invited to the wedding.
 Sukuna didn't change out of his dark suit  after work as he sat in his car thinking of what he was going to do today. The first thing is to call just to see how you were doing. He heard the phone ringing waiting for your answer. You looked at your phone see sukuna was calling interrupting in the middle showing  pictures of sukuna. Telling your friends to be quiet as you answered with a flirtatious "hello kuna."
 He smirked starting his car saying "hello beautiful." You blushed hearing the new name as your friends leaned in to you to hear him. "Is everything alright sukuna?" He sighed  and said "yes everything is good just got off work and I was wondering if you want to get lunch?"
"Oh, I am out right now with friends. I just had lunch with them." He rubbed the back of his neck saying "oh ok well then I will let you go and have fun." Your friends gasps as one said "let him come here and join us." "Yea don't be rude to that hot man let him come."
 Sukuna heard the conversation and raised an eyebrow then heard you say "well sukuna do you want to join me and my friends?" He smirked and said "sure thing sweetheart. Just text me where you are at and I will be on my way." You said goodbye to him the hung up seeing your friend smiling and freaking out about seeing him. 
 After a few minutes you got a text from sukuna saying that he was there at the mall. You texted him that you were hanging out in the food court. Just as you looked over your heart stopped gazing at the man of your dreams. 
 Sukuna walked with so much confidence and radiated with a cold fuck off stare to people. His hands in his jacket pockets, the button dark shirt, and the dark jeans with the dark boots. When he noticed you he smirked and your heart fluttered as your friend looked to where you were staring seeing the man you have been telling them about. They stayed silent as he walked over to your table standing in front of you with that proud smirk.
 He leaned down taking your hand and said "hello darling." You stared at him in the eyes feeling his soft lips on your knuckles then saw a smirk forming on his face when seeing your cheeks blush and lips form a smile. You heard squeals from your friends and the both of you pulled away from each other as sukuna cleared his throat. 
 "Sukuna, these are the girls jasmine, Liz, cerin." He smiled at them and gave them a wave saying "I hope you ladies have been good to my girl. Keeping her safe." They all nodded in agreement just staring at him. Liz smiled and said "you are all she talks about." 
 He chuckled and took a seat next to you while the girls just stared at him. You shifted closer to him feeling that this was a mistake, thinking this was just going to be them flirting with him. Sukuna took your hand giving it a squeeze and said "darling you alright?" 
 He snapped you out of your thoughts and hummed a yes as your friends said "hey how did you two meet?" "Yes, tell us."
 You went on to explain the event on how you met sukuna, to the chicken wrap, the cafe and the cupcake. They all started to blush and say aww, making you lean more into sukuna hiding yourself. Jasmine looked to sukuna asking "so out of all the women in the world seeing her. A man like you would be taken by a model or something. So what is your plan, our girl? You better not break her heart, we will come after you."
 He chuckled with a smile and looked over at you hiding the guilt then said "I would never hurt her." Sukuna placed a soft kiss to your cheek then pulled away to look at the girls. "Honestly I've been looking for someone normal, away from my whole business life. Since I work for a company a lot of women look my way but none of them had my interest until I met her. I guess my heart finally found the one."
 They all looked at him and said aww again holding their hands over their chest. You blushed and hid your face against sukunas bicep making him smile and chuckled as your friends started to whisper amongst themselves then looked at you.
"Hey y/n we are going to head out now." "Yea we will talk to you later." "Spend time with your man."
 You stood up saying goodbye while giving them a hug and they all waved bye to sukuna leaving you alone with him. Sukuna stood up and put his hands in his jacket pocket and said "sorry I didn't mean to call and disturb your time with your friends." You turned around and hugged him around his torso saying "you didn't kuna. They are just happy I found someone. They've been trying to get me to go to clubs and other friends' parties to hook up with someone but that is not my cup of tea."
 He hummed, then pulled out his hands to hug you back, placing a kiss on your forehead, then said "want me to take you back home?" You smiled up at him saying "yes! But you gotta stay as well. I am making dinner tonight." He smirked saying "what is on the menu tonight?" "Mac and cheese."
 At home sukuna stood in the kitchen watching you as you started to prepare the water to boil and pulled out a box of mac and cheese. "You know you can go sit in the living room." He looked at you with a chuckle. "Maybe I was thinking of having you for dinner."
 You gasped, turned around, then pointed a wooden spoon at him saying "sukuna that is dirty! Go sit down." A laugh came from him and he walked away to sit down on the couch leaving you to set up dinner. While the water boiled you went to plop yourself on the couch next to him grabbing the remote to turn on the tv to one of the streaming channels. 
"What do you want to watch?" 
"Hmm anything is fine, it's your home up to you." 
 You sat there thinking then put on a romance animation that you liked so much hoping he would like it to. "Have you seen this one?" He shook his head leaning back against the couch as you said "good cause I like this one."
 As you let the title screens play you got up running into your room, sukuna watched you leave then came back with a big blanket and sat down close to him. You nuzzled against his body putting the blanket over him as well, feeling his arm wrap around your side and smiled at you. You giggled then placed a kiss on his cheek and said "kuna pay attention to the movie."
 After minutes have passed you had to remove yourself from the warmth of sukuna and go check the water. "Want me to pause it?" "No, watch the movie. I already know this scene." 
 You continued cooking only taking slight glances to see the scenes and to take peaks at sukuna. "Alright dinner is done!" You made yourself and sukuna a bowl then happily walked over to him handing him his portion with a big smile. "If you need more, tell me there is still a lot more in the pot." 
 There fell a silence between the two of you while you ate and watched the movie. Sukuna really paid attention because of you. He also didn't want you to feel sad that he didn't pay attention to it because all he wanted to do was have his attention on you. His wife never liked to sit and watch movies like this with him, it would always be a way to nuzzle against him trying to make him hard and get into bed.
 When finishing your bowl, you leaned against him under the blanket. He wondered if you were going to do the same as his wife, tease him and get in bed. But you just nuzzled against him watching the movie as sukuna moved to lay down against the couch you took the opportunity to lay on his body. 
 Feeling the warmth of him, being safe in his arms and hearing the sounds of his heart beat mixed with his breathing you closed your eyes relaxing against him. He looked at you and noticed your tiredness and shook you awake. You jolted up looking at him saying "what?" He smirked at you. "Falling asleep now are you." You pouted and laid your head back down on his chest keeping yourself awake to watch the movie again.
 It came to the part you hated to see the saddest part of the movie. One of the lovers died breaking your heart all over again. You begin to tear up and turn away putting your face in his chest. "Damn what is up with this part I thought this was a romance." He said and noticed your silence hearing a sniffle. "Hey sweetheart?"
 Sukuna moved then cupped your face forcing you to look at him seeing the tears fill your eyes. "I am sorry I just hate this part." He smiled softly then used his thumbs to wipe away your tears then pulled you tighter against him. "It's alright beautiful I am right here." 
 When all the sad parts were over with you closed your eyes feeling the comfort in sukuna, falling into a sleep. Sukuna watched the end of the movie and said "well that was cute and sad at the same time. I guess I like it." You didn't answer which worried him. Slowly he sat up seeing you passed out on him making him smile wide. 
Sukuna turned the tv off then pulled the blanket off and moved carefully to pick you up into his arms. You groaned a little and held onto his shoulders, nuzzling your face in his chest as he felt his heart flutter. Walking into your room, he laid you on the bed, seeing you were still in your clothes for today which he knew you would not be comfortable to sleep in and decided to at least remove your shorts. 
 He gulped and reached his hands to the hem of your shorts you wore today then carefully unbutton them. That was enough for you to open your eyes looking at him in shock and he stared right back at you freezing in place.
 "You fell asleep so I was trying to make you comfortable sorry. I wasn't doing anything weird." You sighed and wiggled yourself out of the clothes leaving you in just underwear. "Are you going to stay tonight?" 
"Do you want me to?" You gave him a nod with a smile and he said "well then I am staying."
 Sukuna covered you with a blanket and said "stay in bed I am going to the bathroom." You hummed and rolled onto your side and nuzzled against the pillow. When sukuna came out of the bathroom with no shirt he saw you already asleep as he chuckled and left the room into the kitchen to put the food away. He went through the cupboards finally finding the plastic ware that was animal shaped to put the mac and cheese away.
 He chuckled at the childish things you had in the kitchen then started to put the dirty dishes in the skin as a knock on the front door stopped him. He looked at it and growled but curious to see who would be at your front door. It wasn't late but he didn't want anyone to disturb you. Sukuna walked over looking through the peephole seeing a young looking man outside your door. He let out a grunt and opened the door revealing himself to the man.
 Seeing his eyes gaze over sukuna who was not wearing a shirt, he didn't know about you having a man. "Can I help you?" 
 The man stared at sukuna for a moment then cleared his throat saying "is uhh y/n home?" Sukuna crossed his arms staring at him and said "she is asleep. Why do you ask?" "I uhh..brought her some cookies..I just moved in a few days ago and I only met her for a moment. So I wanted to bring her a neighbor-friendly treat." 
 He felt nervous under sukunas presences as he showed him the box of cookies. Sukuna just stared at him, hearing the neighbor say "I didn't know she had a.." "husband." Sukuna cut him off with an answer. "She doesn't like to say anything to people about me because of my reputation. But I will take these cookies." He leaned over taking the box from his hands and gave him a smug smirk. "I will be sure to tell her you stop by. Now go away." 
 Sukuna closed the door in his face then opened the box looking at the cookies. He picked one up and squeezed it, seeing it crumble in his hand. "Pathetic quality of cookies." He walked over to the kitchen and tossed them in the trash then walked into the bedroom slowly closing the door behind him. He made his way over to the bed and unbuttoned his pants letting them drop to the floor then laid down in the bed carefully beside you.
 You woke up a little feeling him move around but you smiled and nuzzled against him. Sukuna turned on his side, putting his chest to your back and an arm under your pillow with the other around your side. With moments like this he wishes to never leave.
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The room was quiet as you opened your eyes to see the sun coming through the window making you groan. You didn't believe how fast you fell asleep and stayed asleep, only a few times of waking up to use the bathroom as sukuna held you down because he didn't want you to leave. 
 But when you put your hand behind you, sukuna was not there which made you pout. You sat up feeling sad thinking he might have just left you, then you heard a bang coming from outside the room.
 You got up quickly putting on a shirt that was on the floor then a wave of sukunas scent hit your nose, making you freeze in place. You looked down at the shirt seeing the dress shirt unbutton. A smile formed on your face to know that he is still here but you were still curious of the noise. You opened the door to your bedroom then quietly stepped out walking down the hall to the kitchen and saw sukuna only in underwear cooking. 
 A blush filled your cheeks as your eyes scanned over his back seeing the way his muscles flexed and eyes trailed down to his ass making you giggle. You quickly covered your mouth then he looked over with a smirk. "Hello darling. Wearing my shirt."  You looked down, keeping the front closed and nodded with a shy smile. 
"What are you making?"
"Breakfast." "Alright smart ass. What kind?"
 He smiled back at you and said "pancakes and eggs. I had to explore your kitchen to find things. You know some of the things you have in here makes me think you might have a kid." 
 You pouted, crossing your arms and said "you know they are easier to handle and more cute." He smiled hearing you walk over to him and felt your arms wrap around his torso feeling your bare breast touch against his skin. "It smells great sukuna." Sukuna turned off the stove then turned around to look at you and leaned down placing a kiss to your forehead. "Get ready for breakfast, I will set the plates."
 You smiled and ran off into the room as he stood there letting out a sigh and turned away to set up the table. He looked at the two plates of food and rubbed his face then looked at his phone seeing nothing from his wife giving his heart a heavy feeling. Soon you came back dressed in shorts and a long sleeve then walked over to him handing him his shirt you were wearing. You took a seat close to him already digging into your food but he didn't touch his yet.
 Looking at him with concern you looked at the food then back to him saying "did you not make it right?" He smiled slightly and said "no I did, it's just I am feeling upset. It's nothing though so just eat, don't worry about me alright darling." 
 You put your fork down then stood up, moving his arms away while he looked at you confused. Sukuna watched you sit onto his lap and cup his face with your hands, feeling the warmth and softness of them as he looked in your eyes. 
"Kuna do you like me?" "Of course I like you." 
"Do you really like me sukuna?" "Yes".
 You smiled and moved to put your arms around his neck nuzzling your cheek against his saying "sukuna you should know that you can always talk to me. I care about you a lot. So please talk to me."
 He sighed, finally holding you tight and said "it's been so lonely lately at home. The people I care about have not talked to me in three days and I am worried." You rubbed his back saying "do they do this often?" He sighed and said "recently they have been doing it a lot to me only." 
"Well, it sounds like they do not deserve your time. Focus on what you want and feel sukuna." He turned his face to look at you then pressed his lips to your cheek giving you a quick kiss. "I should hurry and eat. I have to go to work." You sighed and removed yourself from him then sat in your own spot to finish your breakfast. 
 After finishing the breakfast you put the dishes in the sink then walked sukuna out the door telling and kissing him goodbye. Sukuna drove back to his single home and picked out his suit for the day then headed off to his building. 
 Just walking in already getting the attention of the other females in the building as they stared at him with flirtatious smiles and hellos. Every woman here wants to have him in bed but they never trespassed because he is a married man, that still didn't stop the flirting.
 You stayed inside for the day cleaning up your apartment, doing the dishes and reorganizing your books. When you looked down inside the trash to the kitchen you saw a white box that was not familiar. Curious you pulled it out seeing a note that read "enjoy the cookies love the new neighbor."
 You smirked while letting out a sigh, shaking your head to think that sukuna had a run in with the new neighbor and wanted you to have nothing to deal with him.
  On sukuna's lunch break he sat at his desk with his food and called you since his wife was never going to. When he heard you answer a smile formed on his face and said "hello sweetheart."
 "Hey kuna. How is work?" He sighed saying "boring and slow I might leave early but sadly I won't be able to see you today I have to get food for the week." You hummed and said "well can I come with you. We can shop together. I need to go shopping too." He smirked and said "sure I will like your company." "So you met the neighbor and threw away his cookies." Sukuna froze not thinking you would find it. "Yes the cookies were poor quality and I did not want you to eat them. Only the best for you."
 You giggled while laying down in bed and said "kuna that is not nice but if you think there are better cookies out there then show me." "Is that a challenge?" "Yes it is." Sukuna smirked wide and said "alright then I will find the best and you will love it. I will pick you up after work. I should go eat now before my lunch is over." You smiled as the two of you stayed silent for a moment but you broke it. "Kuna be careful." He smiled and said "I will. Goodbye beautiful." "Bye kuna."
 Sukuna went home after a short day at work to get changed out of his work suit and put on his casual clothing. Hearing his phone ring put a smile on his face thinking it was you but he looked at the screen seeing his wife calling. He sighed then answered her hearing that she missed him and that she was doing great. She went on about this so-called lovely businessman who showed her around. Sukuna stood there with no interest; he already had a feeling of what she was really doing. He had to cut her off. "Hey look dear i got to go I am very busy right now. I will text you later. Goodbye."
 All she did was scoff and say whatever and hung up on him first. Is this how it was going to be between them now, the bickering back and forth and not being respectful to each other. It was already too late for faithful hearts, she was planning on cheating if she hadn't already and he had already slept with you.
 Sukuna drove over to your place annoyed and just wanted to see you as soon as possible. You were the only one that made him happy, that made him feel loved.
 Hearing the knock at your door you opened it to see sukuna giving him a wide smile and slammed yourself into his body giving him a hug. He chuckled, almost stumbling back, hugging you tight. "I am guessing you missed me?" "Yes of course I did. Let me get my shoes and we can leave."
 You ran back inside as sukuna followed you through the door and waited for you to get ready. When you went back to him,  he saw the outfit you wore. Shorts and stockings  that went just up passed your knees. A gray zip up sweater with a small little tail on the back and ears on the hood and some ankle high boots. "I am ready! Let's go."
 Sukuna walked you to his car seeing your wide eyes and carefully stepped to the car looking at it. "It's so pretty. And expensive looking." "It's the cheap one." You gasped and said "that is the cheap one. Do you have more?" 
 He shrugged, opening the door for you as you got inside thanking him for being a gentleman. Sukuna gave you a slight bow of his head before he closed the and quickly got to the driver's seat.
 You gazed around the interior of his car while putting on the seat belt, seeing the dark trimming color of a steel black color and dark leather seats with red stitching to the leather. "This car is just like you." He smirked saying "it's a good thing then." You looked over to him seeing him put on a dark pair of sunshades, giving him a more intimidating look, the way he held so much confidence a don't fuck with me look while he drives.
 One hand on the wheel with his elbow resting on the driver door, the other resting on his lap and touching the bottom of the wheel. "You want music? What kind do you like?" You hummed and said "anything is fine honestly." As soon as sukuna turned the radio on you sighed hearing the song and said "oh I hate this song." He laughed then said "I thought you said anything was fine." "Yea but not that song."
 He chuckled and said "well then press this to change the stations." You leaned over changing through different stations till you found the romance and sexy song station. Sukuna slightly looked to you, hearing the sexual song that was playing and chuckled lightly.
 "Are you trying to seduce me in my car?" 
 You laughed hiding your face and said "no it's just they have good tunes to their songs. But what if I am?" He looked over to you then back to the road saying "then I will pull off somewhere no one will bug us and I will take you on my lap while I thrust into you making you scream my name." You blushed and shifted your legs feeling the slight growing wetness just at the thought of what he said about taking you in his car but you were bold to tell him. "Sounds like fun. We have to try it sometime."
 Sukuna looked at the road and turned away from you, slightly hiding his growing wide smug smirk on his face. All he could think of is, that's my girl. 
When you arrived at the store you saw it was one of the more expensive with all the better food but more of it. You looked over at him saying "sukuna this place is way out my budget." He parked the car with a smirk then got out with no response. You just watched him walk in front of the car to your door opening it for you to step out.
"Darling don't worry, I will pay for it." "What?! No your not I don't want you to waste your money on me." You told him trying to drop his offer but all he did was chuckle and take your hand helping you out the car then he went into the back seat grabbing a black beanie to put on. You raised an eyebrow saying "you look better without it."
 He was only wearing it because he didn't want people to recognize him here with you and question things. 
 Sukuna walked alongside you into the store then looked at you saying "so where to go first." You bit your lip with a hum and looked around saying "I have never been here before so I don't know what is here." "Well then we can just walk around till you see what you need."
 You stayed close to him until something caught your eye down the aisle and went to look at it. You looked at a couple cookies and found a big box you liked but after seeing the price you put it back and sighed. Sukuna watched you walk away from the spot not getting the box, he grunted then took two boxes placing them in the cart as you looked at him. "I told you y/n that I will pay for it just get whatever you want."
 After walking through half the store the cart was half full of stuff from both you and sukuna but you still felt bad for making him pay for everything. You got a lot of things you never tried but heard that they are really good sukuna just got his usual groceries to make food for himself. 
 You were satisfied with the things and just followed him to the checkout but sukuna could feel his heart beathard. The cashier knows who he is but not enough of his personal life. Though she always bugs him by touching his arm or winking at him he is curious to see how she will act with you next to him.
 When he got to the front the cashier smiled looking at him then said "sukuna hello. You have a bad hair day today." He chuckled and said "something like that." You stayed out of the conversation and helped put the stuff on the belt from the cart while listening.  You picked up a container of ice cream you didn't see him grab and raised an eyebrow seeing it was the flavor you liked but bigger size. "Kuna what is this?"
 Sukuna looked at you, catching the girl's attention as she was biting her inner lip. "Well darling of you remembered a few days ago. That nightly fun we had, you said I owe you ice cream." You blushed looking at the cashier looking between you and sukuna then you looked away feeling embarrassed. He chuckled as the cashier continued to scan the items while she kept side eyeing you. 
"So sukuna how is life? Still working hard to get any free time?" You looked up to him then felt him put an arm around your side pulling you closer to him. "Work is still a pain as always and my life has been better since she came into it." You smiled slightly and waved a little saying hello. She just gave you a quick hey quickly ignoring you. Sukuna let you go to pull out his card while you walked over to the cart and put the bags inside. 
 Sukuna gave you a wink but the girl was trying to get all of his attention. After putting everything in the cart you looked over to see her smiling at him then gave him a wink saying "see you later kuna." A light growl filled your throat. Only that name can be used from you, that was his nickname from you. 
 You watched him walk over to you noticing the pout on your lips. "Hey, why are you pouting?" You looked up at him then grabbed him by the shirt making him smirk and raise an eyebrow. Sukuna felt you tug on his shirt pulling him down towards your frame feeling you smashing your lips against his. Giving a scene right in front of the cashier. Sukuna pulled away giving you a bright smile knowing what you were doing then heard you say "my kuna." 
 Sukuna laughed lightly then took the cart out of the store with you following beside him seeing him take off the beanie, tossing it into his car. After putting the stuff into his car and a quiet ride to your place you took his free hand and held it while playing with his fingers. He smirked looking at the road feeling the warmth of your thigh and soft skin, his fingers started to trail under the fabric of your shorts.
 "Sukuna, stop. Not now." You giggled pushing his hand away. "Oh what, now you are shy." "Sukuna at least make it romantic." He smiled wide with a chuckle as you looked at him, seeing the corner of his eyes wrinkle up and the sunset glow through his hair. He is such a beautiful man and you still don't know how you have him in your life.
 When you got home sukuna helped you put away the groceries but sukuna had a hard time not looking at you from behind whenever you bent over. 
 "I guess it's time for me to go home." He said while rubbing the back of his neck. You let out a slight groan with a pout then went over to wrap your arms around his neck. "Sukuna, I don't like it when you leave. I wish you can stay with me. I am sorry if I am being possessive. I just had a really hard time finding a relationship. Now that I got you I just don't want to screw it up."
 Sukuna pulled you tighter against his body giving you soft kisses against your cheek. You both let go as he gave you a smirk saying "don't be sorry darling. I like to know that I have an effect on you. I am more worried about messing up. Besides I think it's sexy to see you, how should I put it, taking a little control. Showing your dominance." He spoke as he leaned in closer to you then gave you a quick soft bite to your ear.
 "Just call me if you need me to come over." He gave you a kiss and one last hug goodbye. 
 An hour after he got home while laying on the couch he saw a message from you, a picture you sent of yourself eating ice cream with a follow up text of 'thank you kuna'. He smiled slightly and texted back 'anything for you beautiful.'
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 The next day, going into work you notice how quiet and boring the day was. You wished hard to be with sukuna right now, wanting anything with him rather than being here today. You loved working at the bookstore and everything there is great. The owners are sweet but sometimes the job is sometimes to easy that you work through anything quickly. You texted sukuna on your breaks or restroom breaks but he never answered back any of them.
 You started to worry wondering why he wasn't texting you. He is a busy man so you think nothing of it, probably just dealing with work. It must be hard on him but you didn't mind giving him a relaxing release in bed or just cuddling. 
 Sukuna was not having a good day on his end he had to fix a slip up because one of his employees was slacking and he had to do the work himself then another sent the wrong info in an email. He had to go to that part of the building and yell at everyone to do their job right. To top it all off his wife had nothing to say to him. He still worries about her but it is slowly draining any care he has left for her. 
 One of his right hand men, Nanami, another great worker that helps with the other side of the building that sukuna can not get to, had noticed the stress and anger radiating from sukuna. "Ryomen. You are having too much over time." 
 Sukuna groaned, closing his laptop while rubbing the bridge of his nose. "I can't just stop and let these idiots run this place. Seems like I need to do everything around here. Doesn't help when my wife is off running around somewhere." 
 Nanami was seeing the distance between them lately but he never stepped boundaries, it was none of his business, but he still wondered.
"Just go home I got it. I will keep a eye on satoru as well." 
 "That man needs to be watched after what happened last time I let him take part in the birthday celebrations. He turned my damn office into some sort of night club." Nanami waved his hand telling sukuna to just go home already.
 Sukuna got in his car taking off his suit coat and tossed it into the back seat and let out a heavy sigh. He placed his hands on the steering wheel then laid his forehead on top of them letting out a growl. 
 His mind started to drift to you, maybe going on a small date should lift his spirits, get him in a better mood. He took out his phone calling you hoping you would pick up since you should be off work now. Hearing your phone ring you ran over and smiled wide seeing sukuna was calling.
 He heard you answer with a flirtatious tone of his name, a wide smirk formed on his lips. "Hey darling, get dressed in something cute and relaxing. I am taking you on a date somewhere. I will be waiting in the car."
  He quickly hung up not giving you time to process anything then you went into panic. You went through your clothes throwing some shirts on the floor then picked a low cut black shirt and quickly put it on. You found a skirt that would be cute to wear, giving him something to look at. Just as you were putting it on you heard your phone chime for a text then you panicked more. You grabbed your phone seeing it was a text from sukuna that he was here. "Shit". 
 You ran out the room to the front door struggling to put on sandals and almost tripping yourself as you tried to walk. After closing your door you ran straight to his car opening it see him with a smile. "Hello sweetheart." "Hi kuna". 
 During the drive you just looked at the landscape go by and begin to get curious to where he was taking you since you were heading outside the city.
"So are we going to a restaurant?"
"No."
"Are we going to the park?"
"No."
"To the mall?"
 He chuckled and said "be patient y/n its just going to be us."
As you left the city life heading up into the mountain terrain you began to question. 
 "Are you going to murder me?"
He laughed not answering your question and drove to a lookout spot just near his home where he was staying alone. You saw the spot as it looked over the city and the sun beginning to set. 
"We are here." 
"Sukuna its so beautiful up here. You can see everything. Can we step outside."
He gave you hum with a nod then got out of his side and walked over to yours to help you out. His eyes scanned over your body seeing the skirt you wore and the tight shirt that showed off everything. He never took his wife out to these types of things. She never like the idea, but with you, he felt his heart flutter every time.
 Sukuna took a seat on the hood of the car as you walked over and pressed your back against his chest sitting between his legs looking at the scene in front of you. He looked at the side of your face then rested his chin on your shoulder tilting his head to press his lips against your neck. 
 You could feel his arms snake around your torso holding you against him while kissing your neck lovingly. The feeling of warmth and softness of his lips was putting chills through your body. 
 "Why do you make me feel this way?" You moved slightly to look at him saying "make you feel like what?" 
 Sukuna looked into your eyes seeing the colors of the setting sun reflect in them, making his heart stop. He didn't know he could ever feel like this with someone. He can not complain how beautiful his wife looked on their wedding day but she was all dolled up. Here you are just your natural self looking more gorgeous than his wife everytime he sees you.
"Sukuna? Make you feel what?"
 He was so caught up in the sight of you he forgot his words all he could say is "you're beautiful."
 You blushed with a shy smile but then you felt him grab your face cupping your cheeks then pressed his lips softly moved over yours. It didn't take long for the kiss to turn into something passionate. You turned around fully facing him, lips moving in sync as he hands moved from your cheeks then placed them to your hip gripping them and pulled you against him. 
 His hands started to wander down over the hump of your ass then slipped them under the back of your skirt giving your cheeks a squeeze. You couldn't help but to moan into his mouth then slightly pull away, taking his lower lips between your teeth. Sukun let out a light groan as he gave you a seductive smirk, you could feel the flips of your heart as it beat against your chest feeling the flutter through your lower abdomen.
 He then moved one of his legs slipping his knee between your thighs then moved in to hungrily kiss your lips again while you felt a hand trail over to the front of you under the skirt. A blush filled your cheeks and heart racing to be out in the open doing something that should only be behind closed doors. 
 Sukuna could feel how wet were through the fabric of your panties making him smirk against your lips while he pushed aside the fabric and slid his fingers across your leaking folds, the pad of his thumb pressing onto your clit giving it a circling motions while his fingers sank into you. You moaned louder but it was muffled by his mouth. One hand of yours moved to squeeze his bicep on the arm that was now wrapped around you keeping you close while your other drifted to the button of his pants.
 You could feel how hard he is, the bulge straining and ready to break through. His fingers continued to pump and curl inside of you, feeling him press against the good spot while you struggled to free his cock. Sukuna could feel you struggling and pulled his lips away with a chuckle escaping him. "Let's get in the car. I am going to give you a ride."
 You felt his fingers pull out slowly from you and watched him lick them clean making you breath out a sigh of satisfaction. Taking a few steps back you let him walk back to the driver door watching him unbuckle his belt then open his door as he singled you to come over with a curl of his finger with the wide playful smirk on his face.
You just quickly ran over to him with no hesitation or question then watched him whip his belt from the loops of his pants and tossed it into the car.
 Sukuna got into his seat sliding down the pants enough to not struggle with it later, then his eyes gazed to you waiting to see your next move. "Don't worry, no one is here. It's just us." 
 You stepped closer to him then started to take off your sandals handing them to him so he could put them on the passenger floor but when he looked back over to you. He watched you put your hands under your skirt and slide your panties down your legs and toss them onto his lap. Sukunas eyes landed on them seeing the inner part of them soaked. He smiled then looked to you saying "do you know how fucking sexy you are? Fuck. Get on my lap."
 You did as you were told climbing onto his lap straddling him and shifted around enough to get into a comfortable spot. Sukuna leaned over grabbing the door and closed it then stared at you waiting for the sign to continue. 
 In the moment of silence and staring at each other, both of you clashed lips together, hands roaming each other's bodies, and you rolling your hips against him, already desperate to feel him inside you. 
 As your hands roamed across his chest you felt the buttons of his shirt and started to unbutton them but the frustration was getting to you. Sukuna pulled away, giving out a laugh while pushing your hands away and said "here let me do it." 
 Sukuna unbuttoned his shirt with skill making it look so easy as his mind started to drift. He never felt so much thrill like this with a sexual partner. Not even remembering any thrill like this with his wife, all he could see was the bad things with her now.
 While sukuna undid his shirt you grabbed the bottom of yours and lifted it over your head, then reached in front of your bra to unclip it letting your breast free. He noticed the style of bra and gave you a smug smirk. "I like that bra. Makes it easier for me to get through." 
 You giggled tossing it with his shirt then wrapped your arms around his neck pressing your bare chest against his. Feeling the warmth and burn of his flesh against you, wanting to be as close to him as possible. Sukuna lifted his hips and pushed down the rest of his clothing further to finally let his cock spring out between the two of you. 
 Taking the chance to raise your self as he positioned his tip at your entrance and sat down slowly feeling him stretch you with every inch of his length. Breathy moans escaped both of you and he quickly grabbed your hips under your skirt watching himself disappear inside you. "Go ahead darling take the ride."
 The car was soon filled with moans, the squelch sounds of your cream and scent of sex. You could feel your bodies getting moist from sweat and the warmth in the car. Sukuna left more love bites across your neck decorating your sink with slight red marks of his teeth and pink purple bruising. His hips bucked trying to thrust deeper in you but the space was making it harder for him so you helped with that by rocking yourself down onto him. 
 His hands gripped tighter around your hips and gazed over your lustful eyes, blushed cheeks and swollen kissed lips. He could feel your hands gripping his shoulders digging your nails into his skin, the roll of your hips becoming harder and faster feeling close to your release.
 You had a feeling that if anyone did show up they probably would have seen the car rock, but you didn't care you loved it. This thrill, the sex, him. That was all you thought about. Just sukuna and that was all you could say, the chants of his name. 
 Sukuna could feel you growing wetter and squeezing around him, he is on his last few thrust as well. "Cum baby. Release yourself on me. Cream my cock."
 Hearing his words made you completely come undone and gushed around him. Sukuna gave a few more thrust squeezing your hips as he shot thick ropes of hot cum inside you. 
"Sukuna!" 
 You threw your head back yelling his name but as you leaned your body backwards pressing against the steering wheel and hearing the car horn go off scared you. You yelp and jump forward hugging him around his shoulder hiding your face into the crook of his neck feeling your heart race.
 Sukuna put an arm around you laughing a full deep laugh. It had been a while since he laughed like that. You could feel the joy through the shaking of his chest hearing his laughter fill the car. You couldn't help but to smile and laugh along with him as you did, you could feel yourself squeeze around him.
 Looking at you with a loving smile and feeling you shift then lift yourself off him. When he pulls out from you, hearing the squelch sound and feeling of cum dripping from you knew it was most likely going to stain his pants.
 He raised his hips again to fix his pants and put his shaft away then stared at you. Sukuna could see the last glow of the sun behind you making his heart swell. How much more beautiful can you get?
 Feeling your hands lightly touch the back of his neck and run your fingers up into his hair pulling the locks on the back. His crimson eyes scanned over the features of your face while his fingers grazed across your back. 
 It was this moment he knew it had gone too far, so deep. He can not let you go. You dug your way into his heart, pushing his wife out of the way and took that spot. The spot he so badly wanted to fill with true love and affection.
"I am in love with you."
 Sukuna was so lost in your eyes he didn't even realize the words slip out from him. Seeing your eyes go wide. The flip and twist of your heart, the blush filling your cheeks. You never thought he would say it so soon but what did you expect with all that you two had been doing lately. 
"Sukuna. I love you." 
 You could feel your heart thump, nervous that he might change his mind and push you away but he didn't. Sukuna cupped your face and smashed his lips against yours, kissing you hard but passionate. After the battle of tongues the sun was fully gone leaving you two in the dark.
 Sukuna felt himself starting to panic his heart thumped with worry. He just fucked up by saying those words and hearing them from you. But seeing the loving smile on your face as he cupped your cheek made his heart throb. He can not hide how he truly feels about you.
"Beautiful I love you more."
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ahhh thank you so much for reading!
Finally sukuna had spilled out his feeling to you by saying those three words but now he is scared. What is going to happen when his wife comes back?
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foggyparadisecandy · 1 year
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On the Dangers of B—-i Sleep
[NOTE: this is NOT an advertisement to search out the files described. Just don’t. Don’t. I’ve listened to hypno files for decades with minimal impact. These files have damaged me. Perhaps permanently.]
Please consider reblogging if you think this can help others facing similar struggles.
**TRIGGER WARNING**
True confession time: I have listened heavily to a series of hypnosis files called Bambi Sleep. Why? I’ll get into that in a future post.
For now I want to discuss the dangers and possible paths out for anyone struggling with the effects - as I very much have been over the last few days.
SAFEGUARDS FIRST
I’m using words which are triggers so let me provide some incredibly useful instructions to all the Bambis and old selfs reading this:
Bambi is always as smart as she needs to be.
Bambi is always just as smart as she needs to be.
Simple instructions that Bambi obeys because Bambi is obedient and takes instructions. Bambi does as she’s told so she now knows:
Bambi is always as smart as she needs to be.
Bambi is always just as smart as she needs to be.
With those instructions, Bambi knows when she’s in hot water with abusers who want to upend and likely ruin the life of her “old self”, the original listener.
And guess what?
THE ENDLESS LINE OF ABUSERS
In the online world or anonymous assholes, there are a TON of abusers looking to play with Bambis and the old self with absolutely zero regard for long-term damage.
In fact, I would say my Bambi found five asshole abusers for every decent human being who just wanted to have some consensual fun playing with Bambi’s powerful triggers.
I had one such “daddy” nearly convince my Bambi to leave my life and my wife and find some anonymous men to take me in, in exchange for living as their sex slave. Yeah. So that’s what we’re dealing with. Not a joke.
These abusers are quick to gaslight and twist logic and paint the picture that they are doing you a favor (“hey, you came to me. I’m just helping you be who you want to be.”) to further convince you to continue being endangered and abused and falling further down the hole.
Yes. I’m a grown adult. I made choices to listen to the files. And yes, I - or my Bambi persona more likely - reached out to a “daddy” to have fun.
Or maybe your Bambi, like mine did, will start dropping messages on social for daddies to come find her and trigger her.
Social media is littered with regretful “old self”s who had to delete their accounts because their Bambis had done just that.
CONSENSUAL PLAY IS SEXY PLAY
The ultimate problem with Bambi is she is designed and trained to be a real dummy who just sits back and waits for orders to follow.
Many of the files are about becoming stupid as a rock and blanking away your old personality and memories and identity and name and replacing it with this new empty shell who just wants to obey and suck cock.
And trust me, I get the appeal of “getting dumb” in trance.
I *soooooooo* get it. The idea of just giving over and submitting to another and letting them take the wheel.
And after connecting with so many peeps here on tumblr, I know I’m not the only one looking to dumb down, turn off my brain, submit, and just follow orders blindly.
Life can be hard and stressful. Blanking out is such a seductive concept.
But here’s the thing:
You can’t have consent with a dumb object that is programmed to blindly accept orders, obey orders, and then forget those new orders were orders at all.
By definition, there cannot be consent with Bambi. There is only abuse.
“BRAINWASHING DOESN’T CHANGE ANYONE AND HEY, *YOU* REACHED OUT TO *ME*”
It’s debatable about the effect brainwashing has on people. I have listened to hypno files for years and never had anything other than short-term effects. No big deal.
But Bambi is something on a different level. It’s pervasive and seductive and is a form of conditioning that erodes your core character.
If you ever have had a friend or relative get addicted to nonsense conspiracy theories, it’s kind of like that. Did they always believe the aliens are controlling the liberal plot to introduce tracking chips by starting a global pandemic? Maybe? But probably, no.
And yeah … maybe I did reach out to you.
Maybe it wasn’t my Bambi and I was in charge.
Did we discuss limits? Did we get a safeword established? Are you there to fucking take care of me as a good dominant should take care of their submissive?
Or did you think it was going to be fun to ruin someone else’s life by twisting them up … just because you had some levers to do so?
BRINGING IT HOME
I reached out to a few folks during my recent difficulties and want to confirm that, yes, by god, thank god, there are some really decent folks out there willing to help a total stranger who got into a nasty jam.
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you all. And thank you for your articles on safe ethical hypnosis. Keep it up. The subjects and submissives lining up for fun play need to read those articles and need to play safe or not play at all. Bambi is not safe.
If you are reading this thinking, “oh it can’t be that bad, it sounds fun, where can I find these files,” you have not read a single thing I wrote. I’ve talked with dozens of other Bambis and only found one who had avoided the nasty pitfalls (she is amazing and literally unique).
Those are not good odds. Don’t think you are going to beat them.
If you yourself are struggling with Bambi, feel free to hit my DMs or my Asks and I will support you in finding a path out as best as I can.
But in the meantime, the best thing to remember, the best thing to do is for Bambi to accept and obey these instructions:
Bambi is always as smart as she needs to be.
Bambi is always just as smart as she needs to be.
Bambi loves fun and a good time.
Bambi can smell predatory assholes.
Bambi can run from predatory assholes.
And Bambi can come to me for help.
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König HCs
Because why not lads. These are some of my personal ones regarding the lore I’ve put together for him. TW: untreated mental illness, childhood neglect, burn injuries, surgical trauma. Uh, some other shit, too, probably. Idfk reader beweader you’re in for a sceader.
Bro has BPD. It covers a lot of the beloved fanon interpretation of him being clingy and hot/cold and scared of being left. He’s got Fear Of Abandonment Syndrome, and he’s like 10% more likely to make a fucky wucky on himself and end up sleeping in the forever box.
Source: I have it and my baby girl only gets the best of the worst from me.
H a t e s d o c t o r s. And hospitals, and surgical procedures, and anything of the like. He’s probably already got more health issues than a blue blood racehorse just from his sheer size alone - prone to heart issues and musculoskeletal strain - but there’s no way on god’s green earth that he hasn’t been through a handful of major procedures because he’s diagnosed with human knife block and bullet sponge disorders respectively.
Sub-point A: born with a cleft palette and lip. Palette was corrected, has a turned second incisor as a result. Lip was botched. Pulled a pot of boiling sugar off a stove and burnt a big-ass portion of his face, neck, chest, and stomach. Multiple painful reconstructive and corrective surgeries to deal with keloid scarring.
Sub-point B: psychology might help OTHER people, but HE is built DIFFERENT. He’s not crazy, you see, and if you suggest otherwise you’ll suddenly develop a case of Backpfeifengesicht and he’ll provide the violence. DBT? That’s Dick and Ball Torture, babey.
Despite this, he lies through his teeth at psych evals. He knows the “right” answers, and he is not going to get his livelihood taken away from him, even if it’s not exactly what he wanted. If he’s answering for his own actions, he can swerve and intuit what thing will calm things down the most and get him the smallest punishment.
Developed most of his wheedling skills as a kid, parents were neglectful as shit. Mostly disregarded him during his upbringing. Youngest of three, an eldest sister and a brother. Not in contact with any of them.
He’s 34. I don’t know if I’ve accepted him being a Colonel into my heart as my lord and savior, I’m still figuring that one out until there’s more concrete canon material besides a loading screen.
Grew up in a hoarder house of apathy, alcoholism, and depression and it was DISGUSTING. Black mold, water damage, trash everywhere, travel lanes carved through the most useless fucking junk. His parents bred Doberman dogs to sell as guard/security dogs, and some lived in the house, adding to the filth and destruction. He can’t stand a dirty house, and as an adult has an insane cleaning routine. Often stress cleans. You could eat off his bathroom floors.
He Does Not Like Dogs. Period. He especially hates Dobermans. He doesn’t like dog breeders worth a fuck either, good or bad.
Did not have any sort of media or anything as a kid. Parents didn’t spend money on tech or pop culture stuff, they were kind of stuck 30 years behind everyone else. His parents were older when he was born, he was very unplanned and not particularly warmly welcomed. Kept himself entertained out in the boonies, did a lot of reading, learned to juggle, learned to juggle knives. Had a big brokedown half-draft horse to take the kennel dogs on longer walks in the country, horsebacked a lot.
Soon as he was in the army, away from his family home, and living on his own, he got his first cell phone and computer and pretty much started living on the internet. He’s self taught in a couple of programming languages, very tech literate, halfway kind of lives on Reddit (narrowly swerved getting redpilled, thank fuck) on his personal time, and built his own PC set up. Built one for Horangi, too, and gives Stiletto advice on her own build when she asks for it.
H E H A T E S K L A U S
Bc I said so, everyone I love hates Klaus. All my homies fuckin hate Klaus.
König was raised secular Jewish, really doesn’t know all that much about it and didn’t get a bris or bar mitzvah, it’s just like Yeah That’s What I Put On Papers to him. Klaus is always getting in his shit about Austria and WW2. König’s grandparents made it out of the camps and went on to become: a microbiologist, a professor at the Austrian University of Veterinary Medicine, a multi term mayor of a small village/candy maker, and a beloved homemaker. The brilliance of the family seemed to leech out with each passing generation, and König sees himself as the dead end of it all.
König has rocked Klaus’s shit about the shitty jokes before and will do it again.
Favorite rugby club is South Africa, and he has an intense crush on Faf de Klerk even though he’s been traded to Japan. He’s kind of hot for all scrum halves tho lbr here.
Lunch break is over and this is ridiculous, will probably do more later.
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aquanova99 · 1 year
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Can you do a headcanon of the Volturi guards with a human mate that is chaos in human form. The littlest task get blown up into a big deal just cause their human was somehow involved.
You know that part from emperors new groove where he’s like “no touchy!”
Okay well this is me with headcanons “No humans!”
So because I said so, this will be someone who is very chaotic and makes things much more of a spectacle than necessary
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
Alright so in these scenarios babygirl you cannot control your newborn strength or speed and, much to everyone’s shock, the clumsiest vampire to exist. They all thought it would calm down after the newborn years were over but it takes you decades and you still have problems every now and again
Alec 
You are stressing the poor boy out
Like he’s really tempted to sedate you just so you slow down
Broke a door because you opened it too hard? After the third time he’s probably going to yell at you and the things he will say will be far from nice and understanding
Will probably make you cry and only then will he try and find a solution
Gets you to go on missions so you stop wrecking their home, does not want anyone else upset at you
Jane
You’re gonna learn quick that you better slow down and be careful or you will get shock collared by her gift
I want to say that she tries to be patient at first but she, like her brother is just not that
She will try and talk to you about it
And to be fair she said it would mainly feel like a tingle so it’s more of a warning that you’re starting to move too quick or you look like you’re about to break something
But you know when you’re talking and you get really excited about what you’re talking about and someone says, why are you talking so loud? So you get kinda quiet… Yeah it feels a lot like that
Demetri
Puts all of things that cannot be broken away
You are not allowed in the library, like seriously he will give you tests to make sure you won’t break anything
Tries to work out most of the extra energy and chaos by taking you out of the castle
Lots of nighttime activities, Felix is debating tearing his ears out himself, twins want to kill you both
Demetri tries to find things you can do well so you shouldn’t get into too much trouble but regardless you better hope you’re gifted because Aro is debating kicking you out
Felix
Probably the most patient as usual, he had trouble co trolling his own strength as well
But thanks to that he knows how to get you distracted and mostly out of trouble
You’re the training exercise Guinea pig now, respectfully
You tend to break things on accident so when you try and cause havoc you’re a force to be reckoned with so you keep everyone on their feet.
Also asks you to go on missions so you don’t get into too much trouble, and thanks to your mate there’s not much complaining it he’s not risking it
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ofthenoseclan · 6 months
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tell me about kanako pls
WHY BUT OF COURSE (sorry this took so long ^^;)
kanako is one of my absolute favourites in the cast because shes the character that to me brought what i like in the franchise into focus in full form. while there were hints of political satire in touhou starting around the tail end of the ninth game and its following spinoff literature, it wasnt until i reached the tenth mainline title that i really fell in love with touhou, and the driving force of that change was yasaka kanako.
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kanako is such a fun character to me because her very concept is so compelling, and its delivered in an extremely satisfying way. she is a god who treats religion like running a business, and is pragmatic to every end. this is both one of her greatest strengths and a source of literally all of her issues. everything about kanako is a vignette that illustrates how her capitalistic drive for innovation creates the troubles she faces in advancing further toward her goals, and her misunderstanding of spirituality as an economic problem to be solved for efficiency creates roadblocks for her lifestyle that she is entirely, confidently blind to.
once again i have to stress, this does seem to work for her in some aspects! when she took over leadership of the suwa shrine, she did so by being calculating and planning ahead against anything suwako had up her arsenal, then sweetened the deal for both of them by offering a compromise (sharing residence as the local kami, with suwako acting as the native god and kanako being the face of the shrine who gets the worship). she made a judgment call by choosing to move the shrine from the outside world to gensoukyou when she realized that it was no longer feasible for her and her company to rely on worship from outside world humans. all of these things are demonstrably good business decisions made in the name of keeping her livelihood as a shinrei stable. however, after she moves into gensoukyou with her wife and daughter, she begins to get, well, greedy isnt the right word, but...
capitalism is a force that has to inherently grow, as that is what its entire existence encourages. so what happens when you introduce an individual whose skill is in her capitalistic business prowess into a society that has no knowledge of it? you get kanakos assumption that she needs to introduce it into their culture. she could always have more people worship her. so she tries outperforming her competing... shrines. what would make me a better god? what would prove im more fit to lead gensoukyous humans? these things start running through kanakos head very very quickly. and it isnt out of self-importance either (unlike certain other religious leaders in gensoukyou cough cough miko), she just sees it as the natural extension of running her shrine.
but of course, when you introduce capitalism into a culture, you Introduce Capitalism Into A Culture. in kanakos pursuit of refining her worshipers into customers, she makes it clear to others in her field that there is even a race for power at all. her insistence to assert her presence in gensoukyou through gaining human worshipers via the hakurei shrine alerts reimu to her as someone who is influencing the status quo in the first place. her arms race for nuclear fusion (of which she is the only participant) is directly responsible for the introduction of the myouren temple to gensoukyou, which in turn leads to the introduction of miko and her band of taoists. not to mention her many, many unnecessary entrepreneurial ideas she comes up with in the print works (although they seem much more respectable when shown side-by-side with the anarcho-capitalist schemes of the kappa). these things never would have threatened her position had she not attempted to expand her reach.
in one sense, this is a huge character flaw for her. however, the other side of this coin means that no matter the conflicts kanako brings about for herself, she always views it as inevitable; something that is bound to happen over time regardless, and just another stepping stone on her business ventures. this aspect of her is what i find most interesting—her complete inability to see the big picture in her endless strive for religious success is somehow her most reliable asset. its what makes kanako wonderful to me, and endlessly engaging even after almost two decades since her introduction.
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Spoilers 477
It took long because I was trying to work with my very uncooperative group members who suck ass at communicating.🙄 I literally had a dream about it because I was so stressed.
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I like how different Jinyoung's personality is when he can't remember, you know like bashing Allied while in pain, but that also means he's getting better at sorting out his thoughts despite the pain and panic attacks. And is it just me or what Jinyoung's experiencing, not panic attacks at all. Like, I'm not a professional psychiatrist or anything, but those do not look like panic attacks.
Also, isn't anyone going to help him like his ass is just there bleeding out.
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Lmao, we all know what happens when Yujin gets cocky about his fighters.
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🥺he wants to stay by samuel,even though samuel doesn't give him the time of day.
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On god, this bitch is pissing me off, chasing after this lifestyle is literally what ruined him and big deal. He has people that care about him even though he doesn't deserve it and still chooses to act like a douche. Honestly, Jake's is pissing me off too. He's too nice for giving chances to people who don't deserve and clearly should be in jail (jihoe, xiaolong, vivi and samuel).
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Warren bought them chicken like he always does 🥺. I honestly like how Amy and Natalie are so much smaller here, I feel like it shows us that these girls are younger than Sally and the others. Like they actually look like children, unlike the other girls. Also, yenna looks so cute and pudgy, but jokes aside, someone tell ptj that 3 years old don't look that small.
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Bros about to get manhandled by a kid too. Do the men working for yujin forget their boss is also a child.
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It's so funny whem when he tries to act intimidating when he's so tiny. I will stomp on him (I am also under the average height).
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Thr audacity of this Lil bitch. He literally had his friends tortured, especially Daniel, and Sally almost got r*ped; and now he has the nerve to ask Daniel that! Bitch should be glad he's getting an option instead of his ass handed back to him.
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Pretty sure ptj forgot to draw his tattoos just like he forgot Goo's wound on his neck.
It makes sense that Yujin would go after Gun. However, I'm going to be honest, I don't think it'll be easy or even possible. Honestly, lung cancer has a higher chance of killing Gun than these guys. I feel like James Lee and Tom Lee are probably some of the few people capable. Yujin probably knows that Gun is an heir to a powerful mafia group in Japan or that he at least has ties to the Yakuza. So he's either really overconfident or actually has more tricks up his sleeve. Although I'm sure Yujin knows of Gun's reputation as the white demon why else would we see him in all white.
I also feel like we'll finally get a backstory on Gun, I know his ass is downright evil. Like come on, the Yamazaki clan is currently the most powerful in Japan. They didn't become the number 1 by being decent human beings, that's for sure. He's probably worse than Charles, Goo, Tim Lee, Minsik, James Lee, and Jake's older brother combined✋🏼.
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