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xoxo-teddybear · 4 years

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He’s Lost - Bakugou Katsuki - Part 3

Bakugou x f!reader

Warnings: fluff, sexual mentions, smut, 18+, daddy kink, fingering (fisting?), f!receiving, alcohol, cursing, LONG WRITING PIECE, Bakusquad a teensy wheensy bit ooc, BAKUGOU BEING A BIG ASS SIMP

BAKUGOU’S MASTERLIST

Summary: After the classroom moment, Katsuki’s been doing everything he can to get you back. You’ve both come to terms as friends who are mutually pining for one another, but how long will it take to finally be found by one another?

A/N: Y’all I just have to keep saying thank you to all of you. The love and support is incredible and I never expected my one shot to be so likeable. Anyways, this piece is what will bring the whole story together. Just HELLA fluff. Hope you enjoy!

A/N: If you guys are curious as to what I put for Y/N’s quirk, I’ve titled it Phoenix. She has all the abilities of a Phoenix, like fire powers, regeneration, and flight ability with beautiful wings of fire that can come out on command. Honestly, her quirk isn’t really a big deal in the story but if you wanted to know, there you go.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4

“YOU DID WHAT?!”

“I fucked her in the classroom,” Bakugou so calmly said while taking a sip from his water bottle.

Kirishima felt like he was gonna faint. He told his friend to talk to her so they could make up. He didn’t expect him to dick her down.

“Wow Kacchan, didn’t know you were an exhibitionist,” The electric blonde said while nudging Bakugou in the arm with his elbow.

“I’m not......well-“

“Katsuki” Kirishima said with a warning tone because he did NOT want to hear about his friend’s kinks.

“Right. Anyway, it was fine. No one was there...actually why weren’t you guys there? We all had class you idiots.” Bakugou asked.

“Mr. Aizawa told us the day before that we were going to meet up in gym gamma for an all day training sesh. So we were all shocked when one of our best fighters didn’t show.” Kirishima explained.

“Well nobody told me we were having an all day session.” Bakugou complained.

The group then raised their phones showing the texts sent to the group chat the boys of the Bakusquad shared.

8:47 a.m.

🦈 : Bakugou, tmr is all day training in the gym. Make sure you’re there

11:21 a.m.

🕷: You gonna be in the gym wit us tmrw Bakugou?

2:10 a.m.

⚡️: Sooo we’ll see u in the gym tmr Kacchan?

After some silence and Bakugou’s soft “oh,” Bakugou asked another question. “Well why wasnt Y/N there then?”

“Just like you, the girl wasn’t in class the day before so she didn’t know. She spent the day interning with Hawks.” Sero stated while taking a break from his bag of chips.

‘Hawks huh? Guess it made sense. You both had bird-like quirks, so you guys go well together’ The blonde thought to himself.

“But enough of why you weren’t there, tell us what happened with Y/N,” Sero added on.

“The hell? Why are you so invested in how I fucked her?” Bakugou said with attitude.

“Not that man,” Kirishima intervened, “we wanna know what happened after.”

“We also wanna know which desk you fucked on so we could avoid the cum splatter.” Kaminari said, earning a wack to the back of his head from Sero.

“Well I thought we were gonna make up and get back together,” Bakugou started and the trio of boys stared right at him as if he was going to open some buried treasure.

“But I guess she’s not ready for the relationship again. At least not yet. She said she wanted some time and then she’ll come back to me. All I gotta do is wait.” Bakugou said while getting comfortable in his spot on the common room couch.

“Says who?” Kaminari added.

“ ‘scuse me?” Bakugou asked.

“Who says all you gotta do is wait?” Bakugou looked at his idiotic friend.

“She did, Dunce Face.”

“Well you could wait for her, but if I was you, I’d still treat her like my girlfriend.” The electric blonde stated.

“Huh?” The entire group asked.

“Bakugou look. Give Y/N the time she wants, but you could still treat her like your girlfriend. It’ll remind her of the times you had and it’l-“

“I’m gonna stop you right there Kaminari.”

As the group turned towards the doorway, they saw Y/N. She seemed to have gotten back from some extra training considering she was still wearing gym attire and her duffel bag was still on her shoulder.

“Hey Y/N, just got back from the gym?” Kirishima kindly started up a conversation with the girl.

“Yeah. Had to take a shower there too to save some time. I’m heading back out to go on a late night patrol with Hawks after I drop off my bag, but I can spend 2 minutes to explain something to you, dorks.” You started walking towards the group, more specifically behind Bakugou’s seat.

“I’m gonna make this real simple. Katsuki and I don’t need a grand plan to get back together. We just need some time,” when you finally made it behind Bakugou, you gently wrapped your arms around Katsuki’s neck area, “besides, Suki knows I’ll always come back to him. He’s my one and only after all, right?” You said the last part while looking at Bakugou.

“Right.” Katsuki proudly replied.

You leaned in to give him a little hug from behind and pecked his cheek before walking off to your room.

Katsuki couldn’t help but smile and watch as you walked away. He knew you guys would end up back together. All he has to do is wait. But his moment was ruined by a certain dunce face.

“Damn dude, what the fuck kinda dick did you give her to get her to act like that with you?” He shockingly asked.

“SHUT UP!” Bakugou screamed as his two other friends laughed.

——————————————————————————

Ever since, Bakugou and You grew closer and closer. To others, it looked like exes who stuck to being friends. Best friends, if anything. Y’all played together as best friends, fought and bickered like best friends and looked out for each other and loved one another like best friends. But in reality, you and Bakugou were just falling for each other even more day after day. Yes, it was clear to you both that you were already in love with each other, but damn y’all didn’t know love could grow so strong.

Bakugou stuck to his word though. He was doing whatever it took to get you back, and yeah. Maybe he took a little bit of Kaminari’s advice and continued to treat you as his girlfriend. The only difference was that he didn’t and couldn’t claim you so it kinda hurt him but he was ok because he knows what’ll happen in the end.

So now we have this Bakugou who’s at your every beck and call, even when you don’t call. Thirsty in the middle of class? Bakugou’s got your favorite drink with him on standby. Craving something special? Bakugou will learn how to make it for you. Tired after a hard day’s work? The angry Pomeranian was there to carry you back to the dorms. What a simp.

——————————————————————————

*RIINNNGGGGGG*

And there goes the bell for class. As students walked into their respective rooms, the students of 1-A notice the two entering.

“And here comes Bakugou holding the door for his lady,” Kaminari spoke aloud.

“Hey man, they’re not dating, remember?” Sero reminded him.

“Yet. That’s the exciting part. 2 lovers, patiently waiting for each other. And Bakugou being so willing to drop everything just for Y/N, and Y/N willing to tussle through challenges for Bakugou. Ohh it’s so romantic!!” Mina said with a squeal and excitement.

“Bakubro really doesn’t want anyone else but her....they’re gonna get through this!” Kirishima hopefully said. “If they don’t I’ll beat his ass myself after all the shit I went through for this relationship. You know, THE RELATIONSHIP IM NOT EVEN IN!” He said loud enough for Bakugou to hear.

“Those idiots,” Bakugou growled. “CANT A GUY JUST SPEND SOME TIME WITH HIS GIRL WITHOUT SOME CRACKHEADS WHISPERING ABOUT US?!” He yelled at the group. But with that last comment, you raised your brow.

“So I’m your girl, huh?” You said with a sly demeanor.

This caused Katsuki to blush like crazy. “You know what I meant you little dumbass!”

“Yeah, I’m a dumbass. But apparently I’m your dumbass.” Your snide remarks were beginning to drive Katsuki crazy.

“Ok, that’s it!” With that, Bakugou grabbed your arm and dragged you away from the classroom before Mr. Aizawa came. As the 2 left the room, the boys of the Bakusquad knew exactly what was about to happen.

“Annnddd they’re they go. Off to a place of sweat and ecstasy.” Kaminari sighed.

Ever since that time in the classroom, you and Bakugou have had sneaky links here and there for the past few weeks. A little make out session in the kitchen, a little grinding in the common area, some receiving in many different places. However you were both cautious and made sure it never went beyond that. No vaginal penetration with a penis!

Though you both said you weren’t dating yet, it was obvious where you both would end up.

“What do you mean?” Mina asked.

“It’s nothing you have to worry about, just let them do them.” Kirishima explained.

Fortunately, only the Bakusquad boys were aware of these secret meetings. Once Bakugou told them of the classroom sex, they could tell whenever you two were interested in doing the deed with one another. They also steered clear from Bakugou’s desk. When they found out you both had gone to town on it, they made sure to never go near it unless they knew Bakugou cleaned it up thoroughly.

——————————————————————————

“Mm...Suki..” you breathed out in between the heated kiss.

Here we are in the storage closet. Y/N seated on top of a small standing shelf with Katsuki standing over her and his fist deep inside her.

Katsuki was in the process of marking your exposed breast and enjoying the feeling of your soft walls around his hand. He couldn’t help but speed up his movements.

“P-please....slow down-“ you were cut off by your own moan and cry of pleasure as his fist hit a sensitive area.

“Oh c’mon, you know you love it. You also know you shouldn’t have given all that sass. You knew exactly where it would lead ya,” he spoke as he continued to bite and suck at your nipples. “But I bet you wanted this, didn’t you. You little slut.”

His fist sped up even more and went deeper than before earning loud cries to leave your mouth.

“Ahh...fuck! Y-yes! I wanted this so bad...ohh shit Suki!” You cried out. You felt the coil in your stomach tighten and Katsuki knew what was coming right from the look on your face. He quickly pulled his fist out and dropped his head down to meet your glistening cunt, and continued to finish you off.

“Shit....you taste so sweet.” Katsuki couldnt help but eat you out as if you were his last meal. He groaned as your hands went to tug at his hair to push him in deeper. As he stuck his tongue out to enter inside you, your hips moved on their own and began to grind against his face.

“Yes...yess oh my god..just like that Suki please,”

Katsuki was desperate for more and so his hand went to your clit. He viciously rubbed at it until your legs began to shake.

“F-FUCK!... oh yess...ah!” You let out.

“Let me taste you....come inside my mouth like a good girl and let daddy taste you.” Katsuki demanded.

And you did just that. You released the white honey all on his tongue and Katsuki lapped at every drop, sucking you dry. As he finished his meal he kissed your cunt and continued to kiss you up your body from you stomach to your chest to your neck until he reached your lips. He gave you a passionate kiss, all tongue and love, and you could taste yourself. He was right. You were sweet.

—————��————————————————————

During lunch, the Bakusquad, including Y/N, all ate together and had friendly conversations and arguments as usual.

“Man that steak hit the spot!” Kirishima exclaimed with a breath of satisfaction.

“I bet your already full too, huh Kacchan. Bet you already had your fill of Y/-“

*WHACK*

As the tray slowly slid off of Denki’s face after so rudely being thrown at him (curtousy of Sero) he was revealed to an angry Kacchan.

“Shut up dunce face!” Bakugou yelled.

“You’re one to talk Suki. If anyone should shut up, it should be the one with the booming voice.” You said as you ate your udon noodles.

“ME?!?” Bakugou exclaimed.

“Yes you ya dummy!” You retorted.

“You wanna go shitty woman?!?” Bakugou said while standing up now.

“Bring it on Blasty! I’ll take you on any day!” You replied while standing on top of your chair to beat his height.

‘Typical,’ the Bakusquad thought.

You guys would go from lovers to enemies in a split second with a besties vibe somewhere in between. The fun and teasing bickering went on like this for awhile and has been happening for awhile too. But at the end of the day, there was no real beef between you two of course. Just a mutual pining that involved some attitude.

“Man, you guys have so much energy. Cant you guys tone it down, we’re pretty sure you shouldn’t be so energized after you both just fu-“

*WHACK*

Sero was shut up with a tray (revenge from Denki) before he could finish his sentence and expose the soon to be lovers’s dirty secrets.

“I KNOW!” Mina popped up. “How about a beach day?” The pink alien girl suggested.

“Huh?” The entire group said while Y/N and Bakugou sat down again.

“A beach day! We all have pent up energy and some of us wanna relax so why not get everything out at the beach? Oou! And let’s go at night, it’ll be way cooler and so much more fun. Plus, that’s the best time for us to sneak out!” Pinkie explained.

“The hell do you mean sneak out dumbass? It’s a Friday, if we wanna go the beach, we can just go on Saturday, tomorrow.” Bakugou said.

“Jeez you moron, wheres the fun in that. Look this may seem a little wild since we’re hero trainees and all but how about we take a car to get to the beach?” Mina proposed.

“Mina, we’re under 18. We can’t drive.” Kirishima said.

“Legally. But Bakugou here knows how to drive! Remember that one time Mr. Aizawa made him pull the travel bus around the corner because he was too tired to bring it himself?” The alien girl reminded the group.

“Not only that, but Denki’s parents are outta town!” The girl added on.

“Oh yeah! We could totally take my Dad’s car! There’s definitely enough room in there!” Kaminari said.

The group was now starting to get excited. Except for one blonde of course.

“No way. Like you said Pinkie, we’re hero trainees. We can’t risk ruining ours or UA’s reputation just for some trip to the beach.” Bakugou said while downing his rice bowl.

“Aww c’mon man!”

“Whaaat but pleaseee!”

“Seriously dude?”

“Awwww :(“

The group all said in unison. But Bakugou wasn’t cracking. He wasn’t going to risk his career as a future pro just for a quick trip to some sand and sea.

That is until he felt a tugging on his sleeve. When he looked to his left he saw Y/N holding onto his sleeve with a pout and puppy dog eyes. His heart was about to blow.

“Please Suki?” You whined.

You basically embodied the “🥺” emoji. Bakugou had to turn away so he could deny your request.

“Mm mm” he said while staring out the window next to the table.

You let out a huff of frustration while looking towards your group of friends that were staring at you in desperation. You guys were going to get that beach day.

So you pulled onto Bakugou’s arm and pulled his side into your soft pillowy breast. You reached up and whispered into his ear to make sure no would could hear your next words. With a seductive voice, you spoke.

“Please daddy?”

——————————————————————————

And now here we are. The Bakusquad currently on a road trip to the beach at 9:45 p.m. Y/N riding shotgun, Mina and Kirishima in the seats behind you, Kaminari and Sero in the third row right infront of the trunk, and Bakugou behind the wheel. He was just thankful that there was almost nobody driving around here or else they would’ve noticed this young group of teens driving late at night. He was also very thankful that during lunch yesterday, nobody noticed his raging boner after Y/N whispered in his ear.

“Oh my gosh!! We’re almost there!” Mina squealed from behind.

Although it was almost 10, the weather was still really warm so it would be a fun night. Just the moon, the stars, the sand and sea, and your best friends. Perfection.

“Oh! Suki, you missed the turn for the shortcut.” You pointed out.

“No I didn’t dumbass, we’re taking another shortcut.” Bakugou replied.

“Umm, says who exactly?” You retorted.

“The one driving this damn car, now settle your fine ass down before I kiss you.” Bakubitch replied with.

“Ok, just because you add a little flirt and flare to your reply doesn’t mean your in the right.” You stated.

“Oh but I think it does.” Bakugou came back with.

“Oh! Okay Bakubitch, I don’t know who you think you’re getting smart with-“

“I know exactly who I’m getting smart with, teddy bear.” Katsuki said with a smirk on his face.

“.....Fight me. Fight me right now.” You deadpanned while obviously joking.

“I’ll beat your ass any day of the week you shitty woman-“

“Except you’ll LOSE Bakubitch.” You added.

“You wanna fight that bad, huh shitty woman?!” Bakugou now started yelling in a very Bakugou manner.

“I do! I really do Katsuki! Bring it on Explosion boy!” You said

As you and Bakugou started going at it with your words in the car, the squad was starting to get a little tired of this endless pining. JUST DATE EACH OTHER ALREADY. Mina finally snapped.

“OKAY YOU KNOW WHAT?.....I’m just gonna say it.” Mina started with.

‘Huh’ You looked behind you while Bakugou took glances from time to time in his mirror to see Mina as she spoke.

“Why don’t you cut the horse shit, and get to the part where you admit your feelings for each other?” She added on.

“WHAT?!”

“Excuse me?”

“Oh spare me, spare me, spare me!” Mina went on with. Then, Kirishima joined in.

“Yes yes Y/N, he’s a brute, I know-“

“Hey!” Bakugou interrupted but Kirishima just continued.

“He probably reminds you of a bad relationship and gosh you’d like a real nice man to settle down with,” he added on.

“But admit it! You’re real curious to know what he’s like in the sack nowadays!” Kaminari joined in.

“You idiots are dead meat,” Bakugou said.

“And you! HA!” Mina began to speak. “Well you’re just a big man baby who’d rather act tough then show his true feelings because the last time you opened your heart, you got hurt.....OWIE” Mina said in a baby voice.

“And now,” Sero began, “rather than admit these feelings, you’re dancing around one another with this mind numbing and frankly boorish mating ritual.”

Mina spoke once more.

“So PLEASE, for our sake, either quit your bickering, or PULL OVER, TEAR OFF THOSE CLOTHES, AND GET IT OVER WITH ALREADY!!!”

(Silence)

“Aye, I said what I said.” Mina concluded with her hands up at her side in defense.

As Bakugou and Y/N blushed ferociously, the squad behind them finally settled until Bakugou sped up, swerved the car and hit the brakes.....he was parking.

“Oh look, we’re here.” He said.

As he turned around to look at the group, he saw his friends all mixed up and thrown around the van.

“You guys good?” Y/N asked as she turned around in worry.

“Ugghhhhhh.” Her friends replied, clearly a little bruised.

“Alright then, let’s get going!” Y/N said with a sweet smile and exited the car.

——————————————————————————

After everyone had changed into their swim suits, everyone began setting up. The girls stayed behind with Denki to help set up the towels and seats and bring out the coolers, food, and tables. Bakugou, Kirishima, and Sero went out to collect firewood for the bond fire they were gonna make.

As you looked around the beach, you were glad that nobody was around. You guys could be as loud as you wanted, do what you wanted, and just have an awesome night. And the fact that this was a wild beach meant that there was so much more to do. You guys could go cliff diving, mountain climbing, or forest roaming. No lifeguards to stop you.

As the guys came back with fire wood, Mina and Denki pulled out the cooler.

“Hey guys~, guess what we have!” Mina said.

The group watched as Denki pulled out various beers, wine coolers, and a bottle of Hennessy and shot cups.

“Alcohol?” Kirishima asked, “where’d you guys get that.”

“We grabbed it outta my garage fridge. My family likes to turn up a lot so we also got some spares hanging around,” Kaminari explained.

You guys weren’t first time drinkers. You were high schoolers and you’ve been to parties so of course you guys have already had your first taste of alcohol. Hell, even Bakugou had some before. What can he say, he couldn’t help himself after he saw his friends seem to be enjoying themselves a little too much after getting drunk the first time.

As you started the fire with your quirk, everyone else began to get comfy near the blazing flame. Denki was the last to sit since he went to grab his acoustic guitar to play some tunes. When he finally sat down he began to sing a song.

“Let’s sit around the campfire and sing our campfire song! Our C-A-M-P—“

“NO!” The group all yelled.

“Oh alright!” The electric blonde huffed.

The group all laughed and Kaminari then began to play a chill melody on the instrument. The group was happy, laughing, enjoying themselves and having so much fun...well one of them did have something on their mind but nonetheless still enjoying themselves.

Faces were being stuffed with delicious food, alcohol was being passed around, rounds of shots were being downed like water, and everyone was having a good time. A little game of truth or dare started up and ended after Kaminari and Kirishima both threw up in separate bushes after being dared to kiss each other by Mina.

“Never again,” Kaminari said.

“Yeah I’m good with never having to get kisses from my bro again.” Kirishima sighed.

“Oh whatever you big wussies. It was a fun game while it lasted.”

Everyone laughed in agreement.

“Alright well,” Sero spoke, “we all came to the beach, why don’t we get to the main event. I’m gonna go for swim, you guys in?”

As everyone agreed they all started walking to the water. Well except for two people. As Y/N was walking to the shoreline, a hand stopped her as it grabbed onto her arm.

“You idiots go, me and Y/N are gonna join you later.” Bakugou said to the group and they all said their ok’s and went in. “You, come with me.”

As you and Bakugou walked back to the car, he asked you a question.

“So..you’re not drunk are you?” He asked precautiously.

“Just a little tipsy but I’m still in control. Still aware of everything, so no. I’m not drunk.” You answered.

“Ok cool.” He said as he got into the driver’s seat. Once you finally got in and buckled up, he drove off. In the middle of the drive, you asked him a question this time.

“Hey Suki? Where are we going?”

“I found a special place while I was looking for wood. I wanna show you.” He simply stated.

As he continued to drive off to wherever you rested your hand on the center between you and Bakugou and let your face sit in your right palm as you stared out the window. The songs playing throughout the car gave it a loving and chill vibe. You enjoyed the comfortable silence.

As you continued to stare off, you felt Bakugou’s hand intertwine with yours. You looked back and saw he was blushing while holding onto the steering wheel and staring at the road. Man, he was so hot. In nothing but his swimming trunks as he leaned into his chair and drove off. His defined abs and chiseled chest was definitely eye candy. His giant veiny hand gripped the wheel and his jaw was so sharp as he turned and looked around for other drivers. Yeah, Bakugou was definitely one of those people that looked attractive as hell when they began to drive. You looked down at your hands and squeezed his. You were really enjoying this car ride.

When the car came to a stop, you finally noticed how you were in the middle of the forest.

“Where are we Suki?” You asked him.

As he grabbed your hand he spoke, “just follow me teddy bear.”

You guys walked for what felt like a good thirty minutes until you came across.....a cave?

“I know it doesn’t seem like much but wait until you see the inside.” Bakugou said. As you walked in, you finally realized where he took you. A gorgeous crystal cave. Its colors were shining and its gems were sparkling. All the walls were covered except for the top where there seemed to be an opening. It was letting all the moonlight enter the cave causing the crystals to sparkle even more, including the giant pool of water at the center of the cave.

“Suki it’s beautiful,” you said in awe.

“Yeah, knew you’d like it,” He began.

You both sat down at the edge of the pool just dipping your legs in and enjoying each other’s company.

“Y/N.” Bakugou said.

“What’s up Suki?” You asked.

“I can’t help but keep thinking back to what Mina and the others said in the car.” He admitted.

“What? About pulling over and tearing off each other’s clothes?” You chuckled.

“No. About our feelings for each other.” Bakugou said as he just stared at the pool.

“Oh. That.” You calmly said with a hidden smile and soft blush.

Bakugou grabbed onto your hand before speaking again.

“Y/N I really, really, really, really, really love you....a lot. And I’m so sorry for everything I said and did,” Bakugou started.

“Suki....” you softly said while looking at him. You noticed he was staring down at your arm where your now tiny burn mark was. A scar that won’t be forgotten and a memory that was permanently burned into your skin. Literally.

You saw how Bakugou cringed at the sight of it.

“I am so, so sorry for everything. I don’t even know what I could say that could even make up for what I did. Every night memories of what happened keep coming back to me and I’m still in complete shock that I could even do that. To you of all people! The love of my life....I’m just really glad that you said you’d come back to me and that you gave me another chance to get close with you again. I know I said I would wait for you for as long as it takes but I don’t wanna wait anymor-“ Bakugou was cut off as you raised his head to give him a deep kiss. As he kissed you back, Bakugou put everything he couldn’t say as words into that kiss, hoping you’d understand.

When you finally pulled away, you leaned your forehead onto his while staring into his ruby eyes.

“I don’t want to wait anymore either, Suki.”

With that, Bakugou gave you the biggest smile you’ve ever seen. He pulled you in for another kiss and a tight hug.

“So....you’re mine again?” He asked.

“I was always yours Suki. You’re my one and only after all, right?” You teased.

“Right.” He proudly stated. Katsuki Bakugou finally got his girl back. He finally got his love of his life and his teddy bear. His world felt like it came back together again and he no longer felt lost.

After you both spent more time in the cave, exploring, finding all the gems, and enjoying your renewed and fixed love, you and Bakugou found yourselves back in the same spots you were sitting in when you first arrived.

With his eyes closed, chin resting on your head, and an arm wrapped around your waist, with you cuddled into his side and leaned onto his chest, you had a realization.

“Oh hey, Suki.” You said.

“What’s up teddy bear?” He asked with his eyes still closed.

“We never got to go swimming” you said with a pout.

As he opened one eye to look at you, he noticed your adorable pout and the simp in him came out along side with the devil.

“Alright then princess, let’s go for a swim. We have this crystal pool all to ourselves so why not?”

As you gleamed with excitement, you excitingly got up to jump into the water but before you could, Katsuki stopped you.

“Not so fast princess. Our little game of touch and tease is over now since your mine again. I wanna make up for lost time,” he said with a smirk.

“So you’re saying...?” Y/N asked confused.

“We’re going skinny dipping.”

At first it shocked you but then again, this is Katsuki we’re talking about. So you played his little game.

“Maybe your game of touch and tease is over but mine is still running.” You said with a smirk as you walk towards him. You placed your hand on his toned abs as you began speaking again.

“You wanna go skinny dipping Katsuki?” You then slowly went up to whisper in his ear.

“Then let’s get in daddy.”

As you walked away from him you started to undress yourself in a seductive manner. You started with your bikini top, pulled on the string to untie it and tossed it to the side. As you stepped to the pools edge, you did the same to your bikini bottoms and looked over at Katsuki. You didn’t fully face him as you spoke, but as you were holding up your chest pretending to cover yourself up, you showed just enough cleavage to get him riled up.

“You coming or not?” You teasingly asked before you stepped into the water letting its surprisingly warm temperature surrounded you. You had an idea and used your quirk to turn the pool into a hot spring. As the steam surrounded you, a blush from the heat began to show on your face and Bakugou couldnt hide his hard on inside his thin trunks. He undressed himself and entered the now spring.

A/N: YALL I DIDNT REALIZE HOW LONG THIS WAS SO THERE WILL BE A PART 4 COMING OUT RIGHT AFTER THIS ONE. I LITERALLY CANT TYPE ANY MORE SO STAY TUNED!!!

589 notes · View notes

certifiedskywalker · 4 years

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Sometimes, Love Means Leaving - Klaus Hargreeves

Anonymous said: Hello.... may I please request a Klaus Hargreeves x Reader? Your writing is beautiful and I cant stop reading your Klaus posts! I was thinking maybe the reader and klaus have been together for a long time and when she passes away in an accident klaus stays clean enough to conjure her to try to keep her around and be able to physically touch her again? (like he did with ben) i hope this makes sense.... thank you :)

fabimgc said: Hii, could you do a one shot Klaus x reader, where the reader has powers but died in a mission saving Klaus and Klaus is trying to see her but cant? Like Angst with a fluff ending if you can thankss❤️

AN: this story takes place BEFORE Season One of The Umbrella Academy. I hope you like this!

He felt awful; worse than the day you left. Worse because, when Klaus closed his eyes, he could see your face. You were so close to him, painfully so, and yet he couldn’t quite reach you. The aching in his stomach pulled him back to reality every time.

“C’mon, Klaus, there are better ways to do this.”

“Shh, jus’ shhh,” Klaus whimpered, opening his eyes just enough to glance at the phantom visage of his brother. In his mostly-sober state, Ben appeared more in focus. Light and shadow seemed to meld around him in a way that was more natural. For a moment, Klaus thought his long dead brother was really, truly, there.

“You should have stayed in re-”

“O-oh shit! Peanut gallery,” Klaus groaned, “you need to shhh!” Weak and stumbling, Klaus moved to stand. He pressed his shoulder to the wall, the plaster cooling his searing, sweaty skin. The sharp contrast was shocking to him at first but when he rested his throbbing temple against the wall, he sighed in relief. “Oh, yes. That’s better.”

Klaus let his eyes close to savor the feeling. In the dark behind his eyelids, he was weightless. Then he heard it again. Only sirens at first, high-pitched and ringing in his ears. His heart began to pound as he was thrust back into the memory. Seconds pass and the sirens turned to faint beeping, then a dull, enduring tone. Finally, mournful tune. Violins, piano, he couldn’t tell. Klaus only knew the melody from your funeral.

With a gasp, Klaus opened his eyes and crumpled to the floor of the hotel room he had rented for the evening. The carpet was rough against his skin but he could have cared less. Klaus was too busy trying to calm his breathing, still his heaving chest.

“Klaus,” Ben whispered, kneeling down beside his brother. For a moment, he thought Ben was going to reach out and stroke his hair. It something you used to do when Klaus, in an attempt to avoid the ghosts, went too far on a bender. But, Ben seemed to back down, sit back on his knees and watch him with worry in his eyes. His pity stung.

“Please go,” Klaus wheezed, letting his eyes close.

“I’m only here to-”

“Ben. Go.” Klaus opened his eyes again, “you’re not who I want here.”

Hurt washed over Ben’s face but he stood up nonetheless. “I know you’re grieving, that you’re in pain, but that doesn’t mean you get to be a dick to the people who care about you.”

Before Klaus could snap a witty comeback or apologize, he wasn’t sure what he wanted to say really, Ben was gone. Klaus was alone again, in pain again, and he could feel familiar tears well up in his eyes. All he wanted was you but you were gone and he was, seemingly, still too high to conjure you presence. His head ached with longing and withdrawal.

Frantic for comfort, Klaus thought of you and the last time he tried to get sober. It had all been in an attempt to get you to stop worrying about him. You had come home to Klaus passed out, slouched over the toilet bowl, barely moving. It had scared you so much. Klaus didn’t want to scare you so he tried to get clean.

It was a long stretch of days. Nights were spent in bed or sprawled out on the bathroom floor with blankets strew around your bodies. You would stroke his hair, read to him, in the hopes of luring him to sleep. Klaus could still feel your fingers working the knots in his curls; every some often your fingertips would brush along his hairline.

In the mornings, you would make breakfast together. Klaus would insist on everything greasy and too-sweet pastries from the local bakery. Most times, you would compromise with eggs or toast or fruits. On the mornings after a good night, when Klaus felt most sober and you were happy, you would walk, hand-in-hand and make a day of going to the cafe. Those day-long dates felt so distant now, so muddled by drugs and the passage of time.

“Y/N….” Even your name, falling from his lips, felt different. He screwed his eyes shut to keep the tears at bay. “I miss you. Please...”

Silence greeted his plea. Deafening, heartbreaking silence, and then...

“Miss me? I’m always here.”

Klaus’ eyes flew open at the sound of your voice. There you were, crouching down at his side, eyes meeting his the moment they opened. You smiled and Klaus scrambled to sit up. He let out an almost crazed laugh. He had finally done it.

“Y/N,” Klaus reached out, but stopped himself. He didn’t want his hands to go through you like they did with Ben. It would be another reminder that you weren’t truly here. “I-I…”

“You did it,” you gleamed, “you got sober.”

“Y-yeah,” Klaus was grinning now, “I did. It only took like four ye-”

“Hey, no. Be kind to yourself, this is a process. Especially when you’re doing it by yourself like you had, have been.” Klaus could see the warning in your eyes before you continued to speak. He raised his hands and shook his head.

“I don’t want to waste time with a lecture. I know I need help but right now I,” he met your eyes, “I just want to be with you.”

“Klaus,” your voice was low and your hand shifted to rest on the floor between the two of you. So close yet still so terribly far away. “If you die, we won’t get more time like this.”

He fell quiet at that. You were right, he knew that much, and it made his chest ache. After your death, all Klaus wanted was to see you again. He hadn’t thought about anything else, save for what he would say to you if he ever got sober enough to conjure.

“I love you, Y/N.” He met your gaze and felt his heart lurch in his chest. There, he saw the soft smile he had missed spread along your perfect lips, lips he craved to kiss but couldn’t.

“I love you too, Klaus. That’s why you need to take care of yourself. I want to keep loving you, even if I’m not really here.” You leaned closer to him, “you still have to live your life.”

“I can conjure you now, whenever, like Ben and I-Ben. Did you hear what I…”

“I did,” you admit. “You know he was just trying to help.” Klaus nodded and let his eyes fall to the floor where your hand was still. Small but there, flecks of blood stood out against your skin as evidence of your accident. He swallowed hard before looking back up at you.

“You’re not staying are you? Not like him?” You curled your lips together and shook your head. Klaus nodded again, bitterly this time, and let his tears fall freely.

“I can’t,” you whispered, “not if you’re going to move on. You deserve to move on, Klaus, to live. I can’t, not really, not anymore.”

“But you love me,” Klaus whimpered. There was no use in hiding his tears anymore.

“I do,” you replied, “so much, Klaus, and this hurts me. I don’t want to see you like this.”

“When you love someone you stay with them. Why aren’t you staying?” Klaus was desperate, his hands moved up to his hair where his fingers pulled on the dark strands.

“I already left this...plane,” you gesture to the room around you both, “but I never left you, Klaus. Not for a second.” You scoot along the carpet before you’re sitting before him. You’re so tantalizing close that Klaus swore he could feel your body heat for a second, smell your shampoo. Though that could not be true. “I’ve always been, and always will be, right here.”

Suddenly, Klaus feels a warmth spread through his chest. When he looked down, he finds your hand there, right above his heart. Your fingertips glow in a way he had never seen a ghost’s fingers glow before. At first, it scares him.

Then your free head reaches up, strokes his hair and brushes along his scalp. A calm, a peace he hadn’t felt in a long time washed over him.

It was the peace Klaus felt walking with you to the bakery down the street from where you lived in the city. The same one he felt listening to you talk about your family, about school, about work; he felt it in your voice. Peace came with kissing you, holding you after he was released from the hospital after that first close call. How happy he had been to hold you again.

How happy he was to be holding you again, now. Klaus lunged towards you, wiry arms wrapping over your shoulders and pulling you close. The embrace was tight and Klaus felt everything he had been holding in go; like how he would have to let you go.

“I’m so sorry, so sorry.”

“You have nothing to be sorry for, Klaus,” you said, clutching the back of his shirt. Suddenly, your fingers slipped through the material and you began to pull away. The light in your hands was beginning to fade and, as you sat back, Klaus watched, terrified.

“I love you, please don’t…”

“I love you too, Klaus. You were my unfinished business,” you leaned towards him as the light worked its way through your form. “I’ll always be here.”

With one final movement, you pressed your lips to Klaus’ and he felt his whole body go numb. He felt as if he were floating, made of the same light that was whisking you away to the next plane. Klaus knew, in those precious seconds before he opened his eyes again, that he would see you once more. He would, but not yet.

When Klaus opened his eyes, you were gone. Last, fluttering speck of light had taken your place. Stinging tears flowed from his eyes but his shoulders didn’t feel as heavy. Withdrawals had run the course or perhaps the disappearance of his full-body ache was your doing. He would never know for certain.

Slightly breathless, Klaus pressed his back against the wall. His head fell back and, with a dull thud, it hit the wall as well. His skin, his lips seemed to tingle from your ghostly touch. It was the first time that had happened before. Perhaps dear-old-dad had been right: there was more to his powers than he realized. But, in that moment, Klaus was too overwhelmed to think any further on the subject.

“You alright?” Klaus looked up and locked eyes with his brother. Ben, all dressed in black, looked down at him worried.

“I’m sorry, Ben,” Klaus murmured. Ben nodded and walked over. His slid down the wall to sit next to his sweat-drenched, chest heaving brother.

“I’m sorry too.”

Klaus smiled then and, for the first time in a while, he felt like happiness was possible. His chest swelled at the feeling and, for a split second, Klaus swore he could feel your hand run through his hand one last time.

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pitheinfinite · 4 years

Photo

Bye Bye 2020 (FINALLY!)

I’m actually writing this in 2021, the privilege for being in Asia :P

I don’t know why but lately I stayed away from TS3 and focused on building a TWICE theme park on Planet Coaster on and off. Each ride or roller coaster is based on the elements shown in TWICE MV (debut to 2020). It’s a mega (endless?) project. So far I’ve only finished the section 2015 & 2020.

The only exception is “Cry for Me,” a big hit went viral after stage performance but no MV will be released according to the girls. So I went with my own design, using the concept video as a reference with the elements like thorns, red carpet, candles and tear drop signs. The butterfly actually comes from “I Can’t Stop Me” the song before CFM. oh it’s a free fall ride, and definitely makes one cry XDDDD I really like the result haha. (Btw I have this strong crave for Ferrero Rocher lately...lol)

Another two pieces that I’m especially proud of are the zombie shooting ride “Like OOH-AHH(OOH-AHH하게)” & sync motorcycle coaster “I Cant Stop Me” I made two videos to show how it feels like when you’re unfortunately get on these evil rides. XDDD

youtube

The quality of these clips are pretty crappy cuz my GPU screams whenever I play the game. Besides, building on Planet Coaster is like playing with some digital lego, super time-consuming(For the record, that’s why I download lots of works from Steam Workshop and modify them to my needs. The only thing I build 100% on my own is CFM, so is “Like OOH-AHH, but with some custom contents) . So I bought Project Hospital during the winter sale and enjoyed the different style there. That’s pretty much I’ve been doing with my spare time lately. Not sure when I’ll go back to TS3, hopefully sometime in 2021. See you all soon! Take care and stay safe! Happy New Year everyone!🎉🎆😘

#nonsims #planet coaster #twice (트와이스)#twice #fanwork #gameplay

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98prilla · 4 years

Text

Nightmare

Can’t stop writing me some soft Roman and Virgil!

He was stupid. This was so, so stupid. What was he even doing here, hand hovering over the door, poised to knock, if he could just steel himself enough to knock…

He bit back a growl of frustration at his own cowardice. It felt like butterflies gnawing at his stomach, crawling up his throat, buzzing in a panic in his head, making his shoulders hunch higher. It was the fear of the dark of a child, the fear of the monsters under the bed, the fear of everything and nothing, the fear of the unknowns.

Because what if it hadn’t been a simple nightmare? What if it had really happened and he’d sunk back to his room and cried himself to sleep and everything being fine and perfect and normal was the dream? What if he knocked, and was met with cold, icy eyes?

What if Roman did as threatened and ran him through before he could say a word?

What if Patton told him, so gently it was cruel, that he was a nuisance, a bother?

What if Logan produced his journal, filled with reason upon cold, undeniable reason, that he was simply a hindrance?

What if they were right?

He couldn’t, couldn’t face them. He should just go back to his room and wait for one of them to come looking. If they came looking then it hadn’t been real, but he could not stand to face them if it had been.

He didn’t know why it was Roman's door, he was hovering outside of. Perhaps because the prince was always so blunt. He would know, immediately, with Roman. Maybe it was because he couldn’t take anymore gentle devastation from Patton, any more pure evidence of his detriment from Logan. Maybe because he hoped to god even if it was real, that Roman would somehow pity him enough to let him in anyway, before sending him away for good.

He bit his lip, hand shaking. Do it, just do it, why was this so hard? The longer he waited, the worse it got, the gnawing becoming a pit becoming a black hole in his stomach and he was just about to shuffle away when the door opened, revealing a yawning, bleary eyed Roman.

He froze, fear and hope and shame welling in his chest, making it hard to breathe. Then Roman spoke.

“I thought I heard you out on patrol, Stormy Knight. Wandering the halls so early?”

He burst into tears.

Because Roman had spoken softly, Roman had smiled tiredly, Roman didn’t draw his sword or snarl or slam him against the wall and tell him to never come back, and it had been a dream, just a dream, and nothing, nothing could match the pure relief flooding through him.

“Virg? What's wrong? Are you hurt?” Roman asked. Roman was worried. Was worried about him.

He shook his head, barely able to speak through the tears, through the what ifs still running and running and running through his mind, so loudly.

“H-had to s-see… didn’t kn-know…” he wasn’t being coherent, he barely knew what he was trying to say, but Roman must have understood, in some way.

Carefully, slowly, Roman reached out, tugging Virgil close, wrapping his arms around the lanky side.

“This ok?” He asked, when Virgil didn’t respond at all to his touch. He felt Virgil nod, and he choked out something that was maybe a yes.

Roman nodded, resting his head atop Virgil's, humming softly and he gently swayed with Virgil in his arms.

“there now, my little black hole. It’s alright.” He cried harder at that, somehow, and his hands fisted the fabric of Roman's pajama top, clinging to him as if his life depended on it.

He was barely aware of Roman swaying, murmuring gentle nonsense, as his tears finally gave way to hiccupping gasps, as he sagged against Roman.

“sorry… im sorry, I-"

“Virgil. It is ok, its ok.” He buried his head against Roman, he didn’t want to look up, didn’t want to see the pity in his eyes. “shall we get you back to bed?” his eyes widened, and he shoved out of Roman's embrace, stumbling until his back hit the wall.

“N-no. No! I c-can’t, I c-cant do it a-again, I-" he broke off, breath heaving, hands tangling in his hair as he fought for air, the world blurring around him.

“Kiddo, ya just aren’t really helping Thomas, y'know? It might be better if you just… stopped."

“His productiveness goes down 40 percent whenever you are around, and you also have a damaging effect on his social life. There is no if. Thomas will be empirically better without you.”

“il… eath… please…” no no no no. They were right, of course they were right, he wasn’t good, wasn’t needed, wasn’t-

“virgil.” His eyes shot up, Roman was kneeling a foot away from him, eyes warm with sympathy and concern and understanding. “can you hear me?” he swallowed dryly, managing a small, shaky nod, and Roman's face lit up with a gentle smile.

“good. Then listen to me, ok? You are never unwanted. We love you, I love you. I will never tell you to leave. And I would fight the others if they said otherwise. It was a nightmare, Virge. Just a nightmare.” Slowly, Roman reached out, ever so careful as he tucked Virgil's bangs back, letting his hand rest gently against Virgil's cheek.

“P-p-promise?” Roman's heart broke at that quiet vulnerability, his eyes wide as saucers, filled with a broken kind of hope, a shattering kind of pain.

In an instant, Roman had scooted closer, scooping Virgil onto his lap, cradling him close.

“I promise. I promise, Virgil. I promise.” He let out a soft sniffle, shoulders shaking as he wrapped his arms around Roman’s neck, face pressed against his shoulder, he was tired, so tired, but the fear ate at him, even as Roman rocked him, rubbing his back, murmuring and humming and being so patient with him. And somehow every small action, every small movement of kindness and love sent him back over the edge into tears. They were seemingly endless. He didn’t remember bottling this much up inside, didn’t remember when he shoved all this sadness and deep, aching, endless fear into his chest, but he couldn’t stop it from leaking out now.

“Oh, darling… I know. I know.” He didn’t know how long they had been kneeling there on the floor, but he was exhausted, yet completely unwilling to let go of Roman, too tired to be ashamed of his need for touch right now, too warm and sleepy to force on his dark demeanor, and pretend that he didn’t want this, need this, crave this closeness. “Sometimes talking about nightmares can make them better. That’s what we always do, me and Remus. We tell each other our nightmares, and then we make them better. We say all the ways we would defeat whatever monster hurt or chased or scared us, we turn the fears into something ridiculous. Once, I was being hunted through the imagination, by some giant, shambling, thing. I couldn’t leave the bed, I was terrified. Remus said next time I had that dream, I should imagine the thing trying to move with roller skates on, I should imagine it with googly eyes, I should make its body turn into playdough and its legs into pipe cleaners. It wasn’t so scary after that.” Roman said, getting a small, weak laugh out of Virgil, who shook his head.

“maybe. Maybe in the morning. But i… I can’t… right now, I can’t…”

“That’s ok, too, darling. You don’t have to tell me anything. You don’t have to talk about it. It just may help. Do you wanna spend the rest of the night with me?” He nodded, so fast it made his head spin. He couldn’t bear to go back to his room alone, he would die, if he had to go back alone. “alright. Going up, then, my sliver of starlight.” He let out a soft noise as he was lifted up in Roman’s arms, the fading adrenaline and minor panic attack weighing him down, so he was very nearly asleep by the time Roman carefully settled the two of them in his bed.

He curled tight against Roman, letting out a small happy sigh, at the warmth, at the touch, at the comfort as Roman wrapped his arms around him, cuddling him close and gently, thumb stroking his forehead in blissful, soothing circles.

“go to sleep, Virg. No nightmares will find you here. I promise, love.” Roman murmured, pressing a gentle kiss to the top of his head, causing him to let out a soft, small almost mewl at how damn good he felt. “Sleep well, love. Sweet dreams.”

And they were.

#sanders sides #virgil sanders #roman sanders #emotional hurt/comfort #protective roman #fluff

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crybabysunflower · 4 years

Text

The song which reminds me of a Mystic Messenger character

Introduction

I have chosen this song based on how I have perceived this certain character from the otome game. I have chosen this song because the lyrics reminded me of him every time I listened to the song.

The character I have chosen for my blog is Kim Yoosung and the song which reminds me of him is Zombie by the South Korean punk pop band Day6 from their 2020 album, The Book of Us: The Demon

Before I write this blog I would give a trigger warning because it may have mentions of having suicidal thoughts so please read at your own risk.

The Lyrics

"What kind of day was yesterday

Was there anything special

I'm trying to remember

But nothing comes to my mind"

The lyrics above represents hopelessness and pessimism, the lyrics describes how the singer can't recall anything remotely positive happened to him on the previous day, he has been so used to the misery he has been dealing with. This reminds me of how Rika's "death" had severely affected Yoosung's life to the point that his life had come to a standstill, after that incident he had been waking up to face the same monotonous, miserable days which repeats over and over. He did not experience anything positive enough to affect him since the loss of his beloved cousin.

"Today goes by the same

Am I the only one struggling

How do I get through this

Would things get better

If I cry my heart out"

The first line of the lyrics again brings back our focus to the monotonous nature of the singer's life, just like the singer Yoosung too leads a monotonous, colourless life. Just like the lyrics mentioned above, Yoosung feels that he is the only one who is still not over grieving over his cousin since the other RFA members in his perception are seemingly doing well and are succesful in their careers while he is stuck in the past and wasting away his life. He is desperate to get over the never ending pain he had been feeling since the tragic incident due to which he finds comfort in playing video games which helps him to drown his sorrows but unfortunately it turns into a serious addiction and it actually does more harm to him than doing good. The last two lines also depicts the singer's strong desire to get over the heartache and thus he wonders if crying out loud would make his agony subside. This reminds me of how just like the singer Yoosung too had desired to cry out his pain several times, but he knows that it is futile since the rest of his friends are eventually going to invalidate his feelings in some way or the other.

"Yeah we live a life

Just running in circles day and night

Yeah we live a life

Though I try to change something

I cant seem to do anything

And I have got nothing left with me"

As the lyrics mentioned above Yoosung lives a life where he is just running in circles, he wakes up, goes to school (and can't pay attention to his lessons), comes back home, plays video games for the entire remaining day, and the cycle repeats. However he tries his best to change his situation, he joins various clubs in his school, the stitching club, the barista club and many more but, he quickly ends up losing interest in them and quitting them since they barely help him to cope up with his crippling depression. Just like the lyrics mentioned above, he found nothing to permanently get rid of his heartache. The last line reminds me of the void his cousin and role model Rika had left. After Rika's absence, there was no one for him to look up to, there was no one whom he would love to impress by performing well and finally there was no one to give him the type of emotional closure which he desperately craves for.

"I feel like I became a Zombie

With an empty heart and empty head

A scarecrow without a brain inside

Since when did I end up like this oh why"

Zombie is a person's corpse which continues to haunt the earth even after the actual demise of the person. Just like a zombie, Yoosung had been dead inside. He isn't living up to his fullest like he used to under Rika's guidance before, he is just surviving for the sake of it. A scarecrow is a term which is also used for describing a person in ragged clothes. Usually a person in ragged clothes is either not able to take care of themself and/or is not bothered about taking care of themself. In Yoosung's case, its both. He plays video games most of the time barely letting himself get a wink of sleep, he also does not give himself proper meals on time and happens to survive on convenient store foods and this is all because of his crippling depression which makes him hardly care about his own well being. Since he had been dealing with depression for quite a while and it has been a pretty long time since Rika's "demise" he can't recall for how long he had been persistently melancholic.

"I became a Zombie

I walk on drifting aimlessly

Tomorrow will be no different

I live counting the time

Till I close my eyes"

Initially Yoosung aimed to be a vet due to Rika's influence for which he worked hard to earn the top position in his class during his highschool years and he even joined one of the reknowned universities in the country with full scholarship, until the sudden disappearance of his cousin from his life. After her absence he had lost all of his sense of direction and aim in his life, he was no longer motivated to do well enough to accomplish his dreams. He had stopped expecting anything different would happen to him on the next day and is waiting for everything to end. The last lines reminds me of him in the Another Story routes. There it was very obvious that he had extremely dark thoughts where he wished to put and end to his sufferings (and thats why Zen kept him under his watchful eye to prevent the younger man from doing anything dangerous).

"Yeah we live a life

Eyes wide open in the dark

This meaningless life

Though I want to just let go

Though I want to just dream on

There is nothing I can do anymore"

The line "eyes wide open in the dark" can be used in the situation both literally and metaphorically at the same time. In the literal sense it reminds me of Yoosung's messed up sleep schedule where he barely sleeps at night. In the metaphorical sense it depicts that he can't see anything ahead of himself, except darkness, his eyes are wide open to see any possible beam of hope which he could not find at that moment. His future plans are luxury for him. When he sees the other RFA members, such as Jumin, Jaehee and Zen who are successful he desires to become as succesful as them. But whenever he dreams, he has this persistent thought that he will never be as successful as them, no matter whatever he does. That tragic incident had not only left him with crippling depression but also had shattered his self esteem.

"Get it all out, wanna cry

Let go of everything

Can I cry

Give me back my tears, they have run dry"

The lines above again depicts the desparate need to get over the crippling depression which is consuming the singer like a black hole. From the previous descriptions here, it is clear that in a similar fashion, Yoosung too is desparate to get over his sufferings. This reminds me of that one time when he told that he wants to cry so hard that he would blank out. He had already cried several times while grieving over Rika, yet he isn't satisfied.

Miscellaneous

I had also made a fanart on Yoosung based on this song because I was heavily inspired by the illustrated music videos I have seen of this song

Conclusion

I had been planning to make a lyric blog which would be related to a Mystic Messenger character. I am sorry that this took a very long time to come out. The only alibi I have to justify why I took so much of time is that, I was extremely nervous about it, I wanted to write a very good blog but I was not feeling confident enough about my project and hence I was extremely nervous about writing this blog. I an very glad for having instagram user @emilytheredone help me write this blog, she helped me to ease my nervousness over writing this blog. I am very thankful to her. Therefore, please let me know if this blog has turned out to be good.

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muwur · 4 years

Note

do u think u could write something fluffy for atsumu? :D (if not, bc he just showed up in the anime, futakuchi?) nd they/them pronouns pls :3 ty ty!!!

dating headcanons

✧ hc’s ✧ for atsumu and futakuchi

❧ gn reader

✎ 1.6k words

a/n: oml my first request fgrinffej thank u anon <3 been doing sum ~research~ and brainstorming snaccing and i hope this is okay ! >:) for u i shall do both ppl hehe. feel free to lmk if you would like me to redo or add anything, i wanna do my requests justice :*)

also i find myself gettin inspo at 4 am ofhfuohf i hope this is a bit fluffy, tho its a bit playful n snarky as well fnoggrefjf. also this took me so long bc i literaly got this whole other idea LMAOOOO but i find it more suitable as a separate piece so be on the lookout for that (nudge nudge itll feature atsumu ;) i got a bit carried away AAHA). here u goo

atsumu

✧ boi’s a tease

✧ on days he stays really late to practice so like?? most days LOL you drop by a nearby eatery and pick up some fatty tuna (or something else, you like to change it up sometimes even if fatty tuna is his fave) for him to munch on (gotta replenish your body!!)

✧ even though it’s for him, he’ll make you share the food with him as you both sit on a field nearby the gym

✧ likes to feed you but exaggerates it just to mess with you

✧ “say ahh, y/n” he coos with a smirk when he holds out some food from his chopsticks

✧ and just to mess with him back, you close your mouth around the piece, taking it from the chopsticks slowly and never breaking eye contact with him until after you chew and swallow

✧ “ah, that was delicious, honey” you smile cheekily

✧ rip atsumu, he malfuncc inside

✧ however

✧ fights you for the last piece of any food or snack you’re sharing

✧ “why even offer sharing if you’re just gonna hog it all”

✧ “you were just slower than me, that’s not my problem”

✧ in the end, he would definitely just let you have it. Only fights you when hes bored and wants to provoke you, which is often

✧ pretty affectionate in public. likes to ruffle your hair or place a head on your hand, no matter what height you are

✧ especially likes to do this when you’re annoyed at him, which kinda makes it not cute anymore and you just wanna punch him in the face

✧ as annoying as he could be tho you had to admit that your bickering could be quite fun he was definitely a caring partner

✧ is quick to take notice how youre feeling, liek:

✧ “hey, are you feeling okay?”

✧ “yeah im fine, why?”

✧ “you know you dont have to lie, right? you cant hide these things, anyways, i can just tell if something’s up. what’s wrong, babe?”

✧ pulls you aside to talk things out a little, then offers to spend some time together after practice

✧ squeezes your hand as he walks you home, plants a soft kiss to your forehead before parting ways, and says goodnight

✧ he also notices any changes, no matter how small, in your appearances:

✧ *scrutinizing you* “what do you want, atsumu?”

✧ “did you do something different today? maybe like with your hair or uniform or something?”

✧ “o-oh, yeah, i did.”

✧ “hm. it really suits you, actually.”

✧ “oh, thanks. it’s such a small change, i didnt think anyone would notice--”

✧ “dont get too ahead of yourself, i didnt say it looked nice-- im kidding, im kidding!” he has to say in order to defend himself from your piercing glare

✧ lowkey highkey cant go long without seeing you

✧ so when he finally gets to spend some time with you, he’s even more touchy than usual

✧ you eye him suspiciously before saying, “you’re acting like you missed me or something”

✧ “yeah, i did miss you. something wrong with that?” he asks, burying his face in your neck as he hugs you from behind

✧ “yes, because its been two days”

✧ expect lots of kisses and hugs, though. mans is deprived and he gets what he wants (with consent, of course)

✧ makes sure everyone knows he’s there to stand up for you if necessary, which can be pretty intimidating

✧ loves it when you fall asleep on his shoulder. will take selfies with your sleeping face and show you later

✧ “you look cute even when you’re drooling all over my arm”

✧ doesn’t talk about how he sniffed or kissed your head when you were asleep. definitely doesn’t admit how he was whispering about how lucky he was to be in love with you asdfghjk

✧ was the first to admit he loved you

✧ it occurred after his team won a game to qualify for nationals. excitedly, you raced your way to meet him and tackled him in a hug. who cares if he was sweaty. “i knew you guys would win, and im so proud, atsumu.”

✧ he stumbled a bit and hugged back. he pulled away shortly to look you in the eye

✧ “y/n, i love you.”

✧ and all you could do was blush before he pulled you into a soft, yet passionate kiss

✧ surrounded by like. literally everyone lol

✧ osamu just fake gags in the background

✧ later that day:

✧ “sooooo do I get a reward for winning ? ;)”

✧ “dont push your luck”

✧ but you do spend the night just chilling at his place, watching a movie and cuddling, unwinding from a long day

futakuchi

✧ you met each other in class, bonding over how bored and sleepy you both were

✧ one day he started passing you notes and you went with along it until this class’s purpose in y’alls lives was just for goofing off and totally not to see each other’s smiles or be a bit flirty

✧ loves to mess around with you, but also thinks highly of you

✧ shortly after you started dating and met the boy’s volleyball team, moniwa asks you to please keep futakuchi in line

✧ “babe, please, you’re driving your seniors crazy”

✧ but ever since he became captain, you could sense that futakuchi seemed more responsible

✧ but poor bby was also wayyyy more tired than usual

✧ you poked his back with your pencil whenever you found him dozing off in class, just in time before he risked getting caught by the teacher

✧ you also nagged him about getting more rest and maintaining his health, doing things to help him out until he gave in and made a better attempt at taking care of himself

✧ unless you have other activities going on, you’d usually come by the gym to watch practice and then walk home with futakuchi

✧ you always bring him and his team snacks. they all love you, especially koganegawa

✧ “how are you and y/n dating, they’re so much nicer than futaku--”

✧ cant even finish his sentence before the captain smacks his head and poor kogane chokes on his snacc

✧ but les be real you also go to admire your manz

✧ on the walk home one day:

✧ “you hit a really good spike today”

✧ sheepishly scratches the back of his head, “oh, thanks. kogane’s sets are improving, so it’s getting easier to hit the ball”

✧ secretly loves and craves your praise

✧ futakuchi’s pretty down for pda. you two can often be seen walking down the aisles, hand in hand

✧ will also give you lots of pecks, especially on your cheeks and lips

✧ he also insists on helping you carry your things

✧ wants you to rely on him

✧ saw you shivering once and took his jacket off, draping it around you like nbd

✧ lets just say he wishes he coulda thought of that sooner dhqnwxhgergk youre not allowed to look this cute

✧ but now you literally keep half his closet in your house cuz he always tells you to return it whenever you want

✧ could go on dates anywhere and literally have such a good time. the night market? y’all will share foods and play games the whole time. the park? he could go for a nice, relaxing walk, or if it’s at night, he’d love to lie in the grass and admire the night sky with you (as long as you hold hands lol). at home? would totally binge some shows or movies with you, has sour gummies n a blanket ready to share hog

✧ can be a tease, but will protect you at all costs

✧ glares at anyone who looks at you with interest (boi gets jealous)

✧ had to pull you into his arms and give you a kiss to save you from getting hit on by someone from a rival school. “hey babe, i’ve been looking for you. let’s head back, everyone’s waiting.”

✧ you happily follow him, not noticing how futakuchi looks back at his now sworn-enemy and sticks his tongue out at them

✧ he will fIGHT anyone who hurts you, is very overprotective to say the least

✧ always makes sure he knows where you’re at, starts to worry a bit if you’ve gone mia

✧ got reallly worried one time when he called you like 5 times and you didnt pick up!

✧ 20 minutes later his phone rings and he picks it up immediately. “hello? y/n? are you okay?? you haven’t been answering me for a while.”

✧ “ahh, yes, im sorry about that, my phone died :P”

✧ thinks the best cuddles are the ones in which you both end up falling asleep. also likes to admire your sleeping face totes not a creeper

✧ also loveloveloves to snuggle you from behind and bury his face in your neck and loves to just smELL you

✧ you told him you loved him first

✧ you were having a rough day when you heard a knock on your door

✧ opening it, you found a futakuchi giving you a small smile and carrying a plastic bag full of goodies. “i, uh, didn’t want you to be alone, so i thought we could hang out for a bit? just us two, your favorite snacks, and whatever else you want to do”

✧ touched by his gesture, you pulled him in by his jacket’s collar and gave him a long kiss

✧ after separating, you looked into his eyes as you cupped his face gently. “thank you, kenji. i love you. this means a lot to me”

✧ ejiufnicenjfdhksujsk he nearly melted in place

✧ later tries playing the pocky game with you, but then y’all forget about the pocky after your first round and stick to the smooching

#haikyuu #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu reader insert #atsumu x reader #atsumu miya #futakuchi kenji #futakuchi x reader #haikyuu x you

107 notes · View notes

savnofilter · 5 years

Note

I think you're hilarious in such a good way and Im new to Tumblr. Your work is amzing and i was wondering if you have any bnha blog recommendations or must read fics?

WARNING! this gets long as SHIT. so im sorry. im on mobile so liek,, also there are shit ton of amazing writers on here but my memory has been terrible as of recently, so sorry about that. all the people mentioned have really good fics so going through their masterlist is the bes option i have on here for you!! also sorry this was so late, i did a lot of username checking and now finally got the balls to post this with their @s cnuidwneovn- also!! be mindful because i was iffy in tagging some because i wasnt too sure if they wrote for bnha anymore. so w/o further adieu!!!now for my fave ao3 fics (with no ranking)~

His Tryanny by goodboysensei (tumblr; @tobobio)

au: fantasy

summary: “Deep in a land just like in the fairy tales, lives 4 different kingdoms. But when a hot headed king of one kingdom wants to take over, he seeks for more power. A girl locked away in a tower for her entire life because of her forbidden power, finds a new life when an ash blonde male comes flying through her window. How will their life play out?”

my thoughts: FUCKINGT AMAZING BOOK LIKE I FUCKING STAN. TT its so fucking good! the angst, the tension, angry bloody bakugo?! fucking check! amazing book!! 12/10 will always recommend. mc will say “million reasons” i be like “his tyranny tho, 👀” (and other books but we have to appreciate my highness rq).

completed: yis!

My Angel by goodboysensei (tumblr; @tobobio)

au: greek mythology

summary: “The infamous fallen angel, serving under Hades (AFO), Bakugou Katsuki, was known for constantly wreaking havoc within heaven. Defying against God and other deities, he was blacklisted from Heaven. (l/n) (y/n) being an elite archangel under Athena (Miruko), is set on a mission to rid of Bakugou Katsuki but takes a 180 when you sudden began developing feelings for the crooked angel during the confrontation – him reciprocating the feelings. Though relationships between a worker of God and a demon was the greatest sin, and faced consequences to those who are caught. ~ Having to sneak around and hide your relationship with the fallen angel how would an archangel keep her status under God while simultaneously keeping an accursed romantic affair.(sorry i suck at summaries lmao)”

my thoughts: you know, i just have a craving to live a life in greekish-mythologyish and reading lore of olympus makes it partly redeemed. but this takes the cake. LIKE?! oh my fucking god! absoluetely love and im still reading it cause im slow asf but its so good so far! and she doesnt at all, the summaries are what got me interested!!

completed: neh~

I’m Broken Too (Shigaraki x Reader x Dabi) by Kikyo851 (quotev; kikyo851/tumblr; @heroes-among-us-all)

au: canon

summary: “What’s a girl to do when she can’t quite make it as a hero? Become a villain, of course.”

my thoughts: okay so youre thinking, “that summary is short asf” but godtdamn the book is motherfucking good dawg. lieke,,, this absolutely fueled my villain spark way back whenever. (you can gladly thank this book and all the dabi fics from @lord-explosion-baku, who also has a book called “thorns” which is also on ao3. i havent read it because im not into that au but it has many good reviews!!)

completed: neh~

Million Reasons by Chub_Rye (other socials; not listed)

au: future canon (?)

summary: “This is not a happy story, you really wished it was but how can it be when your marriage is falling apart. You truly love your husband, the thing is…he doesn’t seem to feel the same anymore ((Trigger warning: this is a very emotional heavy story, you have been warned.)) Inspiration: Million Reasons by Lady Gaga”

my thoughts:

*if i had the time i would edit to: “im fucking sobbing fam”* because this shit hurtedt. like, HURTEDT. this book, this very book is the reason why fucking katsuki fucking bakugo slapped down the damn rankings on my list. didnt fucking like him for like two weeks, just thinking about him made me mad as FUCK. but its written so good i cant be mad?! i… okay moving on before i start crying and listing reasons why katsuki needs to CHOKE in this damn book. also if you dislike deku then this story will change. you.

completed: neh~

Muted by HecateSG (other socials; not listed)

au: canon

summary: “A collection of short one-shot stories where the reader has lost the ability to speak due to an incident that ranges from accident, to intentional, which now leaves you in the care of at least one of this dashing and intrepid cast of characters. There will be a variety of scenario’s explored and kinks touched upon for all you curious depraved little ones. ~ The only thing these all have in common is that the Reader will remain almost exclusively quiet the entire time ~ The tags will be updated as more chapters are released.”

my thoughts: this is a one-shot book (no cohesive storyline unless chosen) but its so good. so good. i thought shigaraki, dabi and all might in one book was interesting but never the less, super good! i never was interested in the mute concept but its written good? (but thinking about it all the other mute!reader fics are good but they wont nsfw so it didnt interest me-) furthermore, its so good. so pure. so hot. 11/10 would recommend.

completed: neh~

Nightclub AU by sour_pink29 (tumblr; @heros-amoung-us)

au: well… nightclub

summary: “U.A. is the most prestigious and well known nightclub in the world. It takes a high price and a creditable reputation to attend the club, but only because it makes your wildest dreams and fantasies come true. The workers are the best of the best: the 1A class; with the sexiest dancers, flirtatious waitresses and waiters, master bartenders, and high class security. It’s truly no wonder why the rich and famous travel from all corners of the world to have one special night at U.A. ~ As a waitress at the club, you were used to dealing with rich, handsome, high maintenance bachelors. But when 6 mysterious men enter the club and your life, you feel something different spark between you and them as they turn your life on it’s head. For better or for worse… ~ AU where you and the 1A class (and some other characters) are workers at the club. Kaminari, Kirishima, Katsuki, Shoto, Tetsu, Izuku, and Sero are all competing for your attention. ~ WILL INCLUDE NSFW IN SOME CHAPTERS ;)”

my thoughts: THGIS BOOK FUCKIN SLAPS. HANDS DOWN WOULD TOOT MY ASS UP FOR THIS! (thought about dropping my studies and just fucking doing stripper work-) like wow… its a good book and the writer was prob one of the first wirters i followed on here?! (thats if tumblr didnt fucking remove my damn following like it usually does. ._.) enough about that, its really good. i think about it often.

completed: neh~

Plus Ultra! One-shots and Requests by MistressPikachu (FinalVolition) [tumblr; @adelheidvonschicksal]

au: varies

summary: “A place to store all my smaller drabbles for BNHA. NSFW and SFW requests CLOSED!”

my thoughts: um so she write for *everything* but not like everything, everything. so sometimes it be like a red flag so make sure you are reading it carefully on the story you click on! personally, since theyre a good asf writer i usually dip my toe in all of them but sometimes i just cant but the ones i can, i read over and over and over again. worth a million reads tbh. 12/10 would recommend if youre nasty like that (and i KNOW you guys are).

completed: neh~

slutty one shots by cherrykwrites (tumblr; @cherrykwrites)

au: varies

summary: “Collection of some slutty short scenarios. Mostly Bakugo, could include other characters too. ~ Everything will be NSFW in this collection. ~ Themes like non con, underage, alcohol, bdsm, daddy kinks, ect could occur in these writings. ~ These are purely works of fiction and do not reflect reality, I do NOT condone any of the immoral actions written in these.”

my thoughts: so of course i could not leave the og, the real home slice, cherry-mother-k-fuckin-writes- CAN WE CLAP FOR THE QUEEN? so essentially, her shit is good asf. you should read it cause its good asf. shes not around that much but she def is really good! (also has my thinking about writing some tattoo artist!bakugo these days, or even a series for my husbandos…). never thought about sandwhiched between kirishima and bakugo until i came across her fics~

completed: neh~

Euphoria - NSFW Series by NekokoaFanfiction (tumblr; @nekokoafanfictions)

au: varies

summary: “Just a bunch of BNHA characters involved in several different kinks with you. ~ Summary of first chapter: ~ “Katsuki…”That mewl you made was hard to hear but somehow it reached Midoriya’s ears and he gulped as he saw said man standing up from the ground in front of you. A smirk as wide as it can be with his tongue brushing the corners of his mouth as if he just finished eating the best meal of his life.————————- Basically, Midoriya is in for a emotional ride lol”

my thoughts: they are such a good writer. another one-shots book but they will appear once again on the list but this book is just beautiful. and im a perv. so. have fun.

comepleted: neh~

⚠️okay so this is a series of fics from one writer, but instead of making a shit ton on the list (because if this isnt long already) its by the user QuillMind (tumblr; @quillmind) here are some of my faves:⚠️

Incendiary ~ a/b/o, “Mating season has come yet again. Bakugou has even more trouble controlling it than in previous years… and it’s all your fault.”

Mating Hunt ~ a/b/o, “You and Bakugou have been together for some time. Though you both know you only want each other, your bond won’t truly be permanent and known to all until he claims you during mating season. And as impatient as Bakugou is, as an Alpha, he loves a good chase. You decide to give him one.”

Story Time - A Reader x BNHA Multific by WhenSarahSmiles (tumblr; @makethiscanon)

au: fairytale/storybook/canon-ish

summary: “Whilst fighting a powerful villain, you find yourself sucked into the world their quirk created with no memories of your old life. Yet, the men you meet along the way have a familiar feel to them. Perhaps they can help you unlock your memories? ~ A Hero Academia/Fairy Tale mash up, there’s plenty of chaos to follow even if you think you know the classic stories well. ~ [Warning: Explicit Content from chapter 3 onwards] ~ [I will warn you which chapter features the non-con]] ~ “

-> Story one: Little Red Riding Hood (Katsuki Bakugou x Reader)-> Story two: The Little Mermaid (Shouto Todoroki x Reader)-> Story three: Jack and the Beanstalk (Eijirou Kirishima x Reader)-> Story four: The Three Little Pigs (Denki Kaminari x Reader)-> Story five: Sleeping Beauty (Shouto Todoroki x Reader x Katsuki Bakugou)-> Story six: Snow White and the Seven Dwarves (Midoriya, Tokoyami, Sero, Monoma, Ojiro, Shinsou x Reader)

my thoughts: bitch i have no thoughts. i only have THOTS. this is a masterpiece, like ive been lacking, the one im on rn is the kirishima one and it worth the read, and i bet the ones after that have been just as amazing! amazing work 11/10 would recommend.

completed: neh~

Wolves Among Us (Mini Series) by NekokoaFanfiction (tumblr; @nekokoafanfictions)

au: fantasy

summary: “Something about watching him lick your chilled skin was stirring something within you. Your legs started to shiver, but not of the cold that surrounded your slightly exposed body but of a feeling blossoming in the inner regions of your lower stomach. You were getting lost in the rhythm of his pants, wandering in the hazy want of his intense eyes. Your breath began to tremble, and you tried to squeeze your legs together to withstand the odd sensation growing, but he held your leg still and showed no signs of letting go. You were suddenly aware of his hand on your lower thigh, and you noticed that it was the first time a man’s hand had touched there. ~ You were a flower that had yet to bloom in the late of spring. Pure, untouched and suddenly, bombarded with desires. You never shivered in the way a man could make you, and curiosity—maybe naivety, was keeping you from your fear of the beast. —————– Basically, you fall in love with a rude wolf man. ~ Mini series!! Werewolf!Bakugo x Human!Reader, Fantasy AU ~ Inspired by The Company of Wolves by Angela Carter”

my thoughts: i ride this books ASS for updates. my favourite bakugo au’s are fantasy (wit da dragoons) and were!katsuki (haluween). i fucking love it, i love their works. theyre busy with school (like i should be but scholars are all different-) trust me its so good. it has that good spice that make fill my heart with sexy uwuwuwuwuwuwuwus. love it.

completed: neh~

Katsuki Bakugo Scenario Collection by Hvalross (tumblr; @cutesuki–bakugou)

au: varies

summary: “A collection of oneshots and scenarios I’ve done for Bakugou, both personal works and requests on my blog Cutesuki-Bakugou. ~ Please note that the rating of each story will be in the notes of the chapter. Stories range from TEEN to EXPLICIT.”

my thoughts: oh my god. i reread this one chap over and over and over and over and over and over- and over again. the stories range from cute to just good smut and its so good. so beautifully written. and i cant help but just appreciate it. love it sm. (also sorry if i tagged the wrong tumblr im confsued as to which one you use ahaha)

completed: neh~

Wish the World Away by hoshigalaxy (other socials; not listed)

au: canon

summary: “bakugou katsuki is the number one hero. but with this title comes a huge target on his back. sometimes it’s better to stay single when you’re a pro hero. there could be accidents. ~ but that’s three years in the past now and bakugou is slowly moving on from what’s happened. that is until he runs into his mysterious new neighbour and things get complicated again.”

my thoughts: ;-; this one hits different. almost like a million reasons type of different. i dont want to spoil it but godt damn man. there is so much to be uncovered but it really hasnt been updated. (cri) its a beautiful book tho. fingers crossed for when it updates next.

completed: neh :

Up in Smoke. (Soulmate AU) by Grapelimeade (tumblr; @gojirabbit)

au: well,, soulmate

summary: “Bakugou doesn’t want a fucking soulmate.”

my thoughts: may i say…it is such a stark contrast to Million Reasons. it is so fucking captivating i will not shit you. this book, is amazing. im just saying, that midoriya scene tho,, 👀 that kirishima friendship,, 💪🏽 its so good…? got me panting for the next chap (and no not like that weirdos but there is nsfw because when tf do you catch me reading a fic without nsfw…?) but i recommend. mc: million reasons tho me: up in smoke tho-

completed: neh~

Vermilion by Morgana_Ren (tumblr; @morgana-ren)

au: canon

summary: “Tomura Shigaraki had a goal. It started out simple enough. Kill All Might, and watch the society that revered heroes above all else crumble to dust alongside their idol. However, what originally starts off as a chance encounter with a UA student during the battle of USJ sends him reeling down the crooked path of obsession.”

my thoughts: its just…? my shigaraki thirst was sparked from this very story. it good, supplies my shifty hands needs and it suffices the boiling lust in my clit. wish we’d see more cause i love it already and it blends the story line well. love it. 11/10

completed: neh~

words hurt [Bakugo Katsuki x Reader] by QueenExplosionMurder (tumblr; @strawberryandspiceandchocolate)

au: canon

summary: “*more tags to be added* ~ when Bakugo Katsuki friendzones the reader, their friendship takes a nose dive off of the face of the earth and he doesn’t hear from her for a while. that is until she is suddenly thrown back into his life, quite literally actually…”

my thoughts: well you think i can go a post without tagging my president? youre fucking wrong. i have actually posted my own prev of her book which you can find here. i am just astonished at well the mood is (because tb when all i would talk about is mood) because mood is just good. it doesnt seem cliche to me. cant wait until the next update.

completed: neh~

You and Yamada by Jo_Rutherford_Lee (other socials; not listed)

au: varies

summary: “Just a few short Present Mic/Reader PWPs I needed to get out of my head.”

my thoughts:

i love this book. couldnt find the yamada book i was looking for but i would be lying if this doesnt revive my yamada love every once in awhile. (jk i found the book but this one is really cute and a quick read!!)

completed: yis

Singed Rose Petals: (Alpha) Dabi x (Omega) Reader by Smutsy (other socials; not listed)

au: a/b/o

summary: ““The villains were always ugly in books and movies. Necessarily so, it seemed. Because if they were attractive - if their looks matched their charm and their cunning - they wouldn’t only be dangerous. They would be irresistible.” - Nenia Campbell”

my thoughts: ohhhh because you guys thought that i’d go through a post without mentioning dabi? LOL so,, this book has brought many many many happy coochie tingles to me. i would murder to be dabi’s omega. and DAS on baby. never was really interested in a/b/o stuff till i read this. love it so much 11/10.

completed: yis

special mentions:

BNHA Brothel by orphan_account [multiple, unfinished]

Hero Killer’s Charge by VulcanCaptain [stain x reader, unfinished]

Mouth Moods by Koalolive (twitter; renlup) [present mic, unfinished]

and god please dont fucking roast me i had a hawks faze. Birb Office for Birbs by insanityrunsinthe_family

458 notes · View notes

uncloseted · 3 years

Note

i related to effy an unhealthy amount when i was only 13 when i first watched it, but at the time i wasnt doing drugs, homewrecking, doing anything that young lol. however i was extremely mentally ill but undiagnosed, and so confused but i found solace in effys character because of how similar i felt to her. flashforward to being 20 now and im a nic addict/borderline drug and alcohol addict that forgets to take my prescribed antidepressants and antipsychotics. i cant tell you how many events of effys life have mirrored mine now 7 years later, both the pretty but mostly the ugly. it all feels like a joke to me, and the thing is of course it wasnt effy the fictional character that did this to me, it was the fact that i was genetically and epically set up to do this to me for as long as i existed and i saw myself in her too young. everyone ive ever met and started to befriend has fallen in love with me, has found me beautiful, and then seen my flaws and hated me even if they didnt tell me to my face. ive been a horrible friend and partner and im flighty and unreliable and destructive. i never saw effy, or a person like effy, find a happy ending and im afraid even when im at my manic highs i will never find a lasting happiness and will always accidentally self sabotage until i die. what im trying to ask is, how can i save me? i know its dumb to ask a random tumblr user but ive been following this blog since i was 13-14 and since you know effy through and through, you might know a little about me. its a long shot. (i’d also like to say this isnt a cry for help and im safe/not actively suicidal so i dont want you to feel like theres any pressure like that, but i did use this ask box as a free therapy session.)

I'm a bit biased, but I don't think there's anything wrong with asking a random Tumblr user at all. I'm happy to be a free therapy session when you need one, and I'm really touched that you've trusted me with your thoughts and feelings for so long. Hopefully I've been some help over the years 😆

Coping with mental illness can be really, really hard, but the good news is that with the right tools and support system, you can absolutely recover. It sounds like you already have a psychiatrist in your life, which is a great start. If you've having trouble remembering to take your medication, it might help to set calendar reminders on your phone, set up text prompts to remind you to take your pills, to link taking your pills with something else you do every day (like brushing your teeth or eating breakfast), or to reward yourself for taking your medication (for example, putting a piece of candy in your pill box that you can eat after taking your pill).

If you don't have one already, a therapist might also be a good idea. It can take a while to find the right therapist for you, so schedule a few appointments and see which therapist you "click" with. A therapist can help you work through any reluctance you might have towards taking you medications, as well as helping you come up with day to day strategies that help you achieve your goals and helping you work through the beliefs that you hold about yourself and the world that may be holding you back.

Moving on to talking about addiction for a bit. I strongly believe that addiction doesn't come from some type of inherent lack of willpower or moral failing, or even really the drug itself. It's the need to escape reality. And that's actually supported by scientific literature; most famously, the Rat Park experiment by Bruce K Alexander. Practically, we've seen that same thing in the aftermath of Portugal's decision to decriminalize all drugs. They took the money they were using to keep drug users in prison, and instead invested that money into reconnecting people who struggle with addiction to society. Their goal was to make sure that every person who struggles with addiction has a reason to get up in the morning and has a support system within the wider society. And it actually worked- injection drug use is down 50%, overdoses and HIV infections have massively decreased, and rates of addiction decreased as well. It's much easier to quit when you have something motivating you to keep going.

Why am I telling you all of this? I guess what I'm trying to get at is in order to recover from addiction, I think first people need to understand what the reality is that they're trying to escape. What can be done about those issues? Who's in your corner trying to support you, even if they're not doing the best job at it? Where else can you get the social support you might need? What are you passionate about? What would make it feel worth it to get up in the morning? I think instead of focusing on the drugs, or the alcohol, or the cigarettes, maybe we should focus on solving the root problems that make those attractive options. That's one of the reasons a therapist is a really good idea; they can help you figure out what those root problems are, and provide resources and tools to help you fix those problems.

In terms of practical, do it yourself advice for dealing with addiction, there are a couple things you might try. I did a whole post on evidence-based ways to set goals and follow through on them here, so I won't rehash it in this post, but basically:

Try to set goals that are specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and time bound. For you, this might be something like "My goal is to have only one drink a day (measurable and achievable) for week (time bound) so that I can be more reliable for my friends (relevant)".

Instead of trying to quit something, replace it with something else. For example, "when I feel like smoking, I'm going to do ten minutes of learning Korean instead". Learning something new is easier and more exciting, and so new habits are easier to maintain that breaking old ones. Find a new hobby that you've always wanted to do or that's exciting to you, and try to focus your energies on that to distract yourself.

Identify any obstacles (such as environmental triggers) that you might run into, and develop contingency plans for working around them. This might be something like, "when I drink coffee in the morning, I want to smoke, so I'm going to switch to tea instead." If you can, get rid of all environmental triggers that might remind you of your addiction or trigger a craving.

Get someone else involved. Tell a friend about your goal and have them check up on you. Your fear of disappointing them will help you stay on track.

Put money on the line. Give money to a friend with the understanding that you'll get it back at a set date if you've achieved the goal you set. Tell your friend that if you fail, they should donate the money to a group or cause you really hate.

Write down the reasons you want to quit, and put them somewhere you know you'll see them. Whenever you want to engage in an addiction behavior, read through that list first.

For bonus points, add to that list your contingency plan for when you want to engage in an addiction behavior. These may include ways to redirect your attention or distract yourself until the craving passes.

76% of people who wrote down their goals, actions and provided weekly progress to a friend successfully achieved their goals.

You might also try an addiction recovery app, such as these, or doing Cognitive Behavioral Therapy worksheets on your own if you can't access a therapist right now.

There are also some things you can try in order to improve your mood. As much as I hate that this is true, consistent exercise has a huge impact on mood. If you can, try taking a 20 minute walk outside, 3 times a week. Other (boring) things, like making sure you're getting 7-9 hours of sleep a night and eating regularly, can also make a big difference in mood. Some of you might know that I'm a little bit obsessed with the free Coursera class "The Science of Well-Being". It has a lot of great evidence-based tips and tricks for how to build happiness, and I highly recommend it if you're trying to live a happier life. These include things like journaling, meditating, noting things that you're grateful for, helping other people, and having regular social interactions.

Finally, a few philosophical thoughts. One of the Four Noble Truths in Buddhism is dukkha. Basically, this is the idea that suffering is an innate characteristic of existence in our world. When I was younger, I never liked this concept, but I think now I kind of get it. It's impossible to be happy 100% of the time, and that shouldn't be our goal. Suffering is the comparison by which our lives gain meaning. But we can do our best to minimize our suffering and the suffering of others, and ride the wave of suffering when it does come. And each time we ride that wave, we can learn techniques to manage it a little bit better, and to make it easier the next time. We will sometimes sabotage ourselves out of fear, but we can learn how to do it less frequently and for the consequences to be less dire. We can learn how to forgive ourselves for our flaws and what we've done in the past, and learn from those mistakes so we don't do them again in the future. It's also okay to backslide, to struggle even after you've made progress. You're never back where you started, because you've always learned more and experienced more.

I know I've thrown kind of a lot at you in this post, and I don't expect you to try all of it or for all of it to work, but hopefully something in there is helpful to you. You can get through this. You can save yourself, but please, also remember to let others help save you. You don't need to do this on your own. And just like I have been since you were 13, I'm always here to give a free therapy session and to lend my support ❤️❤️❤️

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diamondcamefromhell · 5 years

Text

Finding home ~

Jaskier x Reader

[a reupload, as the first time it didnt show up in any tags, for some reason - trying to see if this fixes that x]

This was an amazing request my anon:

“ Can I request a Jaskier x reader where the reader has a massive crush on him and is jealous of all the girls he’s always with and just feels super insecure and like she’ll never be enough and on one day when she is feeling particularly down in the dumps she just breaks down and Jaskier finds her like that? Like start with angst end with fluff type thing? “

Thank you for this. i didnt even know that I needed this a lot. to write it and feel it and what not. i loved writing it. sorry it took so long for me to get to it. i hope you like it nonetheless.

Warnings: drinking (not sure if this should be a warning, but i guess better safe than sorry)

Word count: 2,497 (my longest one yet!)

Requests are open, and all feedback is appreciated!

There are things you never get used to, your crush being surrounded by a herd of women is one of them. When I began having a crush on Jaskier, at first I was sure I could keep it under the wraps, get it out of my head and heart easily. I never wanted to like such a flirt anyways. But life works in funny ways.

The more I liked the bard, the more women seemed to gather around him. His singing was like flowers, and they were bees, looking for them. His honey must’ve been sweet.

I grunt, making my way across the tavern to Jaskier, who’s chatting with some woman. She’s pretty, I cant deny that, but I ignore her, inserting myself in front of the lady. Being this close to the bard does make my heart beat faster than I like, but I ignore it.

“Jaskier.” I say, smiling at him, praying to whoever listens that my blush on the cheeks just seems like alcohol redness.

“Y/N?” He raises his eyebrows, and I notice him glance over my shoulder at the woman behind me. My stomach twists, wondering if he’s comparing her to me.

“Maybe we should head out?” I say, lifting my arm, getting ready to push the bard ever so little. But it stays frozen in mid-air, as Jaskier moves out of the way. I try to hide my annoyance, taking a moment to gather myself, before I look at him again.

“The night is still young, Y/N.” He picks up his lute, smiling at me, and then giving a wink at the woman behind me. My chest tightens.

“Geralt is…” Jaskier scoffs, cutting me off.

“Geralt can wait!” He shouts, picking up a tune.

I stand there, helplessly watching him. I know he’s doing what he does best – entertaining people. Flirting. I wish he didn’t have to do it all the time. The woman he was previously talking to pushes me to the side, giving me a nasty look, before facing Jaskier and going to dance to his ballad.

My blood boils as I feel anger wash over me, but I manage to collect myself. I don’t like losing my cool, especially not for random women. All of us are the same, falling under bard’s beautiful curse. He can’t help but be so lovable. I know there is not an ounce of bad intentions in Jaskier’s heart, and he does not wish to hurt me or anyone else, for that matter.

But this still did make my chest feel uncomfortable and my stomach tie in knots.

I take another cup of ale, staring as two more women become enticed by his music. They twist their bodies in a way that almost seems inappropriate, but it’s a fine line and they thread it well. I cant complain, they are just having fun. Unlike me, brooding here at the bar.

I analyse them, so confident in their bodies, knowing how to handle it, mapping every move perfectly. They find their footing easily, dancing to the rhythm, offering beautiful smiles to the bard. Even their hair, clipped back perfectly, only a few strands curtaining their faces. They were beautiful. You could write so many songs about them.

Unlike me. I could never dance with such ease and whenever I tried to clip my hair, it would all fall on my face, making me look crazy. Having a nice dress was not an option, as we were always on a move. I wish I could at least pretend to be half those women. I chug the last bit of ale, my liquid courage, making my way to the bard yet again.

Jaskier sees me attempt at dancing, giving me a smirk, approaching me. He twists around me, as we seem to dance together, but he soon trails off, to other dancers, leaving a cold spot in my heart. When he finishes his song, before he can get his hands on other, I jump in front of him.

“I don’t want Geralt to be angry.” I whisper, gently tapping his arm. Jaskier sighs.

“It’s not like we are going anywhere tonight, Y/N. And believe it or not,” he winks at me, making my heart flutter. “Witcher is not such a baby, he can fall asleep on his own.”

“I know that.” I try to look for an excuse, something that would drag him out of this tavern, away from these women, who were looking at me, angrily. I feel like I am surrounded by wolves. “I just don’t want him to come here and ruin our night.”

“Then maybe you should go be with him,” one of the women barks at me, as I helplessly grip onto Jaskier’s top tighter. “Instead of ruining everyone’s night.”

“Easy there, ladies.” Jaskier’s tone is still playful, but his eyes grow a little bit cold. “There is enough Jaskier for everyone.”

“We just want to have fun.” She basically droops herself on him, pushing me away. “She has you all the time, we want to dance just for one night.”

I pray Jaskier doesn’t fall for her sweet words, and for a moment, I get hopeful, as he gently nudges her off himself. But then he picks up his lute yet again, playing a tune. Slowly, I am pushed further and further away from the bard, as my heart aches.

Anger boils over me again, as I rush to grab someones cup from the nearest table, heading straight for the girl who pushed me and did the talking. I ‘accidently’ walk into her, spilling the drink all on her dress. She gawks and other women gather around her, squealing like rats. I see Jaskier rush to get something to clean her dress, realizing that he won’t be leaving anytime soon – so I make my leave.

The night is cool - I feel cold bite me. I am not dressed appropriately, as I realize that I left my coat in the tavern. Returning for it would mean having to face those women again. Seeing them twirl around bard, my bard, was too much for my heart too handle. So I just wrap my hands around me, as I realize I am not shaking only because of the cold.

I’m upset. Angry. Sad. I didn’t even know anymore. I was tired of seeing Jaskier be with all those women all the time. He doesn’t even need to try, they sniff him out like prey. He loves attention, he’s sweet and caring, and any person with a brain loves that. I wish I didn’t have to share him with the whole entire world.

Of course, I have to remind myself that he is in fact, not even mine. And by the looks of it, he never will be.

He always seemed to fall for everyone, but me.

Tears burn my eyes, as I pick up my step, fearful some townsfolks may see me. When I am finally in the woods, my heart calms down. I am so glad we didn’t have enough coin to afford a tavern tonight, being in the woods offered an escape and shelter I so desperately needed.

I see campfire and Geralt, still awake, sitting by it. His lips move, and I know he’s talking to Roach again. I make a b line, realizing I don’t want to have to talk to him. Nor do I want him to see the tears, who have so brutally made their escape, streaming down my face.

I head for a river nearby, dropping on my knees, resting my head on a tree. I cover my mouth, making sure that the Witcher can’t hear my silent sobs, I shake uncontrollably. I never knew a simple crush could cause so much heartache, so much pain. I see my reflection in the river.

I take a rock, sending it at it. It splashes all over me, but I don’t care. I don’t even care if I alerted Geralt. I cant begin to care at all. I hate being surrounded by beautiful women, who know all the right things to say. They smell of cinnamon and apples, not of horses like I do. They were everything I could never be, and that was why Jaskier always gazed at them.

And they gazed at him, in return, he would gift them songs. They would gift him with dances and kisses. It was a flawless, perfect exchange that I have seen so many times, yet have never gotten a hang off. I could never perform it, no matter how much I wanted to.

I fully lean on a tree, covering my face, completely silencing my sobs. I trap them inside me, where they should stay. The wind picks up and the breeze is cold, making me shiver even more. I uncover my face, staring at the river, wondering if things could ever change. I don’t like my odds.

I hear a branch break to the right of me, turning around, startled. My fear doesn’t go away, as I see Jaskier, standing there, his hands up in the air, as if he’s surrendering. What is he doing here? I want to wipe my face and pretend I am fine, but instead, I feel my lips shake as more tears come. I look away, shielding my face from him with one hand.

“Y/N.” He says, softly, as I shake my head. I want to tell him to go away, but I am scared of how my voice would sound. “Are you okay?”

“Do I look okay?” I manage to say, as my voice shakes.

“You don’t.” Jaskier answers, making his way towards me. Slowly, however, as if he’s cornering an animal. I wonder, just how bad do I look.

“Then don’t ask stupid questions.” I sniffle, wiping my nose with my sleeve. Not very ladylike. “And leave me alone.”

“I think you could use a friend.” He says, keeling to my level. Friend. Always a friend.

“I could use alone time.” I try to argue, but Jaskier is already sitting down. Our shoulders touch and the warmth he provides makes my tense body relax just a little. His hand lands on my knee, and I want to pull away, but I don’t. At the end of the day, it’s his touch that I crave.

“I’m sorry.” He apologizes, but I don’t look at him. My gaze is fixed on a river. It flows so effortlessly, without struggle, I wish life was this way. “Listen, Y/N, I never wanted to make you upset.”

“You didn’t.” I say, not taking my eyes off the river. I notice big rocks in it, obstructing it’s flow.

“I didn’t want those ladies to upset you, then.” He changes his words, squeezing my knee. My eyes water yet again, but I blink it away.

“They didn’t Jaskier.” My voice breaks halfway through, sounding deeper and rougher after it. “Nobody upset me. I did it to myself.”

“I hate seeing you like this.” I continue staring at the river.

“Then leave.” I say, breaking my own heart. The river doesn’t flow simply, it has things obstructing it’s way too. Nothing in life is simple. I take my eyes off it, glancing at Jaskier. “You don’t have to see me like this.”

“I do.” He doesn’t seem to be fazed by my words, as he gently smiles. “I care about you, Y/N. Truly, I do. And I don’t care how angry or upset you are, I want to see it all. Because I don’t only care about the happy you, I care about all of you.”

“You don’t have to.” I repeat myself, like a parrot. My mind is blank, as I soak his words in.

“Right. I don’t have to, I guess.” He sighs, leaning on my tree too. Our faces are almost touching. I close my eyes. “But I want too, then. I get tired off all those perfect women, with their perfect lives and perfect hair. Believe it or not, perfect is boring.”

“But perfect is perfect.” I argue. I understand what he means, however I still want to be perfect. Perfectly boring. “Nothing can beat that.”

“Spilling a drink on a girl sure beats that.” He giggles, as I feel his body shake. I blush, not opening my eyes. “Being unapologetically and imperfectly yourself beats that too. Once you get the taste of perfect, you realize that fine wine is highly overrated.”

“So you prefer cheap ale?” I tease, as my body relaxes even more. With my eyes closed, I don’t see him, but feeling him, I know he’s here. I know he’s listening. It makes it so much easier to talk, truly open up.

“Yes. I guess I do.” His hand finds mine, squeezing it in a tight embrace. “It’s like coming home, where I don’t have to pretend. I don’t even like wine, yet I drink it. Blending in with the crowd you’re entertaining is what I do it for.”

“Isn’t it in bards blood to stand out?” I open my eyes, not looking at him. I listen to us breathing, as he thinks of an answer.

“You are correct yet again, my darling.” He sighs. “But stand out too much, you become a royal clown. Stand out too little, you fade away. You need a perfect amount of attention and praise.”

“You love attention anyways.” I see him nod, as he smiles.

“Empty attention is empty attention.” He leans forward from the tree, as I see him face me. I don’t turn to do the same. “It only matters when it’s coming from someone who truly cares about you. All of you.”

“How can you tell if it’s genuine or empty?” I turn to him now. His eyes shine, seemingly reflecting the stars in them. I try to look away, but his cosmos has sucked me in.

“You just know.” He leans in, placing his forehead on mine. I close my eyes, as my breath cuts short. “While we all enjoy finer things in life, there is nothing like people who make you feel at home.”

“Like Geralt.” I say, breathlessly. I try to divert the conversation, scared to get my hopes up, just for them to be shattered again.

“Like you, Y/N.” The way my names slides off his lips sends my heart to a race. I feel my face heat up, as tears prick my eyes yet again.

As he realizes I am crying, he pulls me to his chest, gently rubbing my back. Jaskier allows me to feel it out, to cry it out. Not worrying if I ruin his fine outfit or if I smell of Roach.

He doesn’t care about that. He didn’t need someone with a fancy dress or perfect hair. This little bard was more than just someone who was aiming for fine thrills. He was looking for a home, something exciting. Something not perfect.

And I guess somewhere in there, I fit in. Perfectly.

#jaskier #jaskier x reader #witcher #witcher imagine #jaskier imagine #jaskier fluff #jaskier angsts #fluff and angst #witcher netflix #geralt #geralt of rivia #roach #good girl energy #roach the best horse #tags pls work #thank u

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lucifers-trash-stash · 5 years

Text

Power Games

Summary: This is the third and final part to the “Mind Games” and “Twisted Games” series. It’s been so much fun to write this story and gave me some interesting territory to work in, and I will be working on the rest of my requests soon <3 So for now, please enjoy this final part, where you’re infractions are brought to Tarkin’s attention and you are punished for your desires ;)

Word Count: 1828

Warnings: Mostly warnings for some dubious consent, double penetration, and a Darth Vader/Wilhuff Tarkin/Reader threesome.

The last few days had been far from normal. After the incident during the meeting with Darth Vader, Tarkin had taken to glaring at you every time you turned around. It wasn’t unusual for Tarkin to have such a cold unwavering stare, however there was something different about this. When before he might not even look up when delivering important queries to him at his desk, he now made a point of giving you direct eye contact until you had to look away. His ice blue eyes were as cold as the rest of him, and it was impossible to meet them for too long.

You tried to brush it off and focus on your work. There were worse fates for you if you didn’t complete your tasks than being stared at by the Grand Moff. As long as you weren’t being reprimanded, it was fine.

You had hoped the rest of the day would go smoothly, but those hopes were dashed as soon as Vader swept through the door. Trying to maintain your composure, you didn’t dare look up at him. He strode past your desk, his cape billowing behind him as he approached Tarkin.

“What brings you here, Lord Vader?” Tarkin asked, his voice calm and precise.

“I have some information that might be of interest to you,” Vader’s voice hissed from the respirator.

“Oh? Pray tell what this information is?” There was no surprise to Tarkin’s voice. Whatever it was that Vader was about to tell, Tarkin was already made aware of. Your pulse quickened, your fingers trembling as you typed on your data pad.

Vader’s breathing was deafening in your ears. “I’ve been made aware of a subordinate’s inappropriate conduct while on duty. I think it is only fair that we deal with them and help correct the behavior.”

“I believe that would be a wise decision.”

Before Tarkin’s words could truly sink in, you felt something drag you from your desk and land with a thud onto Tarkin’s. You sputtered for air as the wind was knocked from your lungs, and you stared up in horror as Tarkin sat at his desk before you, fingers laced together as he leaned forward slightly in his chair. You were in the unfortunate position of being bent over Tarkin’s desk, Vader standing right behind you. Your limbs were heavy as you tried to scramble away, but you were pinned to the desk and unable to move from your compromising position.

“Now, things will prove much smoother for you if we hear the offenses in your own words.” Tarkin briefly let a cruel smile twitch upon his lips before returning to his neutral expression. “You will not like what happens if Vader has to provide the gruesome details himself.”

As embarrassing as it was, you knew you had to tell him. They were making this as torturous for you as possible. You still didn’t understand why this was happening, but you supposed it was another demonstration of Vader’s infamous cruelty and debasement of underlings that did not do as was instructed of them. Only this time it was more intimate of a punishment than the choking he was known for.

And when you heard the beep of the door locking from across the room, you knew there were no other options.

With a wavering voice, you began, “I apologize, sir, for my recent… inappropriate thoughts towards Lord Vader. He became aware of them and began to punish me for them.”

“In what way?” Tarkin asked.

“He… touches me without touching me. I can’t explain it.”

“The Force,” Vader interrupted, finally giving a name to his power.

Tarkin hummed in thought. “Yes, I am quite aware of this ability. Though I was not aware that it could be used for such things.”

“Anything is possible through the Force,” Vader supplied.

Tarkin didn’t address this. Instead, he lifted his hand to his chin and tapped his cheek with his index finger in contemplation. “Vader, might we perhaps have a demonstration?”

Before you could protest, that familiar touch pressed against your sex, pulling a sharp gasp from you. Immediately, you pressed your forehead to the desk in shame, your hips bucking against the sensations as you couldn’t bear to look your superior in the eye. But his lithe fingers wrapped around the hair at the base of your neck and pulled your head up, forcing you to look Tarkin in the eye as a whimper escaped your throat.

With a stern gaze, he uttered, “Now, please continue. I want to hear every detail.”

“He touched me at my desk. At the meeting.” Your breathing became laboured as you tried to speak with the prodding between your lower lips. “All he does is tease me, he never lets me come, he leaves me so wet and needy.” Your voice was keening now. “Oh kriff, I need more, please!”

Vader’s tone remained even as he commanded, “Tell him about his desk. Tell him about the name which you want to call me.”

Tarkin’s eyebrow quirked in curiosity. Before you could provide the answer, another jolt of pleasure left your sex tingling in desire, hips rocking against their invisible binds. After a few shameful moments of long, drawn out moans, you finally gasped out, “I want to be taken on your desk, sir, I want to be ravished and fucked, and I want to call Lord Vader ‘Daddy’ while he fucks me.”

After the rush of information, circles were rubbed into your clit as he dangled you above your release, stopping the pleasure as soon as you got close and then applying it again to torturously inch you closer before denying you again. You hadn’t fully processed your mortifying confession to Tarkin, you just needed to be fucked. You were so wet, you feared even Vader’s invisible touch wouldn’t mask the lustful sounds as the phantom fingers rubbed up and down your lips.

Tarkin’s brow furrowed slightly at the information. “How utterly obscene. To think these desires were in the mind of such a quiet and competent young woman.” His free hand stroked your cheek thoughtfully as you practically gushed from the sudden skin to skin contact you craved for so long. “However, since you have been so forthcoming with your discrepancies, I believe we can come to a mutual understanding, wouldn’t you agree?”

“Yes sir,” you whined.

With that, Tarkin stood up from his chair and rounded the desk, while at the same time Vader’s touch disappeared. You whined at the sudden lack of contact before your pants were unbuckled and yanked down your thighs. Tarkin’s hand ran down the flesh of your bottom, making you cant your hips back against his touch. When he finally reached the well between your legs, you gasped, panting as his long fingers were coated in your juices. You didn’t hesitate when he brought the fingers to your lips, and sucked them greedily into your mouth as he hissed. “Absolutely filthy. We will take care of this infraction and cure you of these rampant desires that have been impeding your work.”

When he removed your fingers from his mouth with a pop, he stepped up behind you and used his foot to push each of your legs apart as far as they could while your pants were holding your knees together. Vader now came into your field of vision, his arms crossed as he watched your prone figure twitch beneath him. As Tarkin took himself out of his own pants and brushed himself against your lips, an embarrassing squeal of pleasure erupted from your throat. You needed to be fucked so badly, and now you were going to. It didn’t matter how awkward it would be doing your job after this, having to pretend nothing conspired in this room between these two powerful men whenever you stood beside them. All that mattered now was your overwhelming need to be filled and fucked properly, no more teasing and no more delays.

There was no need for Tarkin to prepare you, as your gushing sex made it quite easy for him to completely bottom out within you in a matter of moments. He grunted in satisfaction as your walls constricted around him. Without being able to control yourself, the mere action of filling you pushed you over the precipice and an earth-shattering orgasm wracked your body. His hands found your hips and proceeded to fuck you through it, your wailing only spurning him on further.

As he continued to fuck you, Vader stepped towards you, his gloved hand reaching out and gripping your chin. The leather smell flooded your senses, and you whimpered desperately as you stared up at him and his unreadable helmet in reverence. His thumb moved into your mouth, and you began to suck on it eagerly, the material cooling down your tongue. You whined and moaned around his thumb as Tarkin took his pleasure from you, priming your body for another orgasm.

Suddenly, there was a sensation at your other hole and your eyes widened in fear. You tried to shrink away, but it was impossible being held down by both men. As Tarkin’s cock thrust in and out of you, Vader used the force to tease your other opening, all while you keened around his thumb in a mix of horror and desire for what was being done to your body.

Just as the multitude of sensations were putting you over the edge, Vader leaned down in front of your face, and you saw your reflection in the black emptiness of his helmet. In a calm voice, he said, “You have earned it.” And you immediately knew what he meant.

As Tarkin stilled inside you as your pleasure rushed over you, you let out a wail of “Daddy,” muffled slightly from his thumb in your mouth. Tarkin’s member pulsing inside you, you were filled with a warmth all over your body, certain that the overload of pleasure would leave you unable to move for hours. Even when he pulled out of you, the intermingling of yours and Tarkin’s juices trickled down, painting the inside of your thighs with your debauchery.

You were still twitching sporadically as Tarkin adjusted himself, Vader watching your expressions as his loud breathing filled your ears. Suddenly, Tarkin pulled you against his chest, his hand firmly holding you upright against him as he spoke cooly in your ear, “Now, I hope there shall be no more issues and we can all conduct our business like civil adults in the future.” He paused, casting a glance at Vader and then back to you. “If not, I’m certain you could inform us of such infractions before they occur and we may curtail them to the best of our abilities. Do you understand?”

You understood fully. And you were excited for the next time you should decide to call on them when you were in desperate need of a man’s firm touch.

-----

Tags: @vizhi0n @opheliadawnwalker3

#Darth Vader #wilhuff tarkin #darth vader fanfic #darth vader fanfiction #wilhuff tarkin fanfiction #darth vader x wilhuff tarkin x reader #star wars #star wars drabble #my fanfiction

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vegetalass · 5 years

Text

Dog House

GOD this fic has been the death of me!!!! i started writing it OVER a month ago after getting the idea at disneyland....

ive honestly put so much time into it that i cant read it anymore and it probably sucks since i cant tell if its good quality anymore...

but i hope its okay! i really am proud of it

beside, i LOVE john wick so... it cant be too bad haha... *broken heart emoji*

i posted it on AO3 here if you want to read it with better formatting

Enjoy!!!!

Warning: contains light violence

John Wick/Reader - 5105 words.

_________________________

It is a beautiful day. The sun is bright, the sky is blue, and as the waves crash against each other in front of you, it seems as though the world is stuck in time with your breathing.

It is warm, and things are good, as you think about what you should name the tiny gray sand crabs that rest in the small green bucket by your feet. You watch someone in the distance lift their hands and wave at you, smiling from afar, the sunshine a blanket that blocks their eyes from meeting yours, and you push yourself to remember what color they are.

Though it is warm, and you are resting, suddenly, the world spins and you are no longer at the beach but on a cold floor, and the sky is not blue but deep red. Although they were just waving, you can hear the shots, taste the blood and then see as the light goes out behind the eyes of the only person whom you so desperately love.

The image of raised arms blur as they reach out to you in one final stretch, and though you can’t remember their last words, and you’re sure that you don’t want to, you know that they have asked you to take care of the only thing they have left besides you.

A dog.

A dog who is loved and warm and probably asleep, safe at home in wait of a person who is not you and never will be, as you are busy holding a dead body and screaming as you watch a man dressed in black walk away and never come back...

And you are... Oh, God.

You are...

You...

You are at the dog park, and the sun is bright, and the sky is blue.

You open your eyes suddenly, hands clenched into fists, with your heart hammering wildly against the bones in your chest. Your pupils dilate and then burn, the sun seeming so bright against the backdrop of the green grass and dogs in your vision who bound about through the open park as though there is not a care to be had in the world.

Maybe there’s not, and God, you wish there wasn’t, but you’re not a dog and you don’t like the park. You have long since learned better than to live in some pretend world where you can spend weekends at the beach with all the people you love, because at this moment in time, they are all dead.

Except your dog, that is, and he’s not even really your dog. But you love him, so you save the complaining for in your head and just tell people that he was a gift rather than an inheritance after his original owner died.

You try not to focus on the past often, but it’s hard, especially now that you’re alone. It’s not like you crave love or anything like that, really, because you understand that all things come and go. It’s just that your idea of the future has always seemed to rest on the balance between finding peace and hope, and you have been ashamed to say that as of late, you are not someone who can be considered either peaceful or hopeful.

Not since you watched love die by the hands of a Heckler & Koch P30L.

Baba Yaga, you remember. The title always used to seem so silly.

Whatever, you think, hands still clenched, eyes still aching, Those days are over now, and I’m at the park.

Even if you can remember every single shot and the moans that came from the dying body you held in your arms after a raid that you were barely lucky enough to escape from alive. You almost wish that you-

“Hello?”

Someone says and you jolt, the deep voice piercing the bubble of concentration you were lost in. You raise a hand to your heart in shock, as you gaze wide-eyed at a man who stands in front of you looking hesitant and apologetic for something that’s completely unbeknownst to you.

You didn’t even notice when he started standing next to you, his tall frame shading you from the sun as you try to look around him, confused.

“Yes?”

“I just wanted to stop and say I’m sorry,” he voices immediately, sounding weirdly concerned about something you gather you’re supposed to know about but don’t.

So you freeze, almost completely sure that you look like an idiot as you stare at this stranger with your lips turned down in what’s probably an awkward frown.

“What are you talking about, sir?”

“I...” He blinks at you, eyebrows knitted together in confusion, before his face softens and his dark eyes look down to avoid your worried gaze, “Sorry. Forget about it.”

You blink, still surprised that someone is initiating contact with you at all, before you nod at him slowly.

“Okay,” You hesitate, unsure of what to call him, and what he could’ve meant by his words. He doesn’t seem like anyone you could’ve met before, but you still can’t shake the odd feeling that you have when his eyes bore into yours, “You are...?”

“John.” He replies slowly, almost in a sad way, and you smile back at him absentmindedly, trying to forget the embarrassing miscommunication that just occured as he reaches out to shake your hand.

Again, there is that familiarity to him, an uncanny edge to his presence that makes you feel like deep down, you’re supposed to recognize who he is.

However, you don’t bother wasting any more time with fitting the key into the lock of figuring out who he is, because you find everyone to be slightly familiar now, most faces blurring once you decide whether or not it’s worth it to keep looking at them.

Deep inside, you know it will never be the same.

Nobody is the same.

Besides, by now your concentration has slipped again, as you are distracted by a dog in front of you who is wagging its tail, its little gray face smiling at you as though you are some kind of angel in heaven.

Which you’re not, but the dog wouldn’t know that.

“Is he yours?” you ask, shielding your eyes from the sun as you reach out to pat his head, once, twice, and then over his ears. The dog’s eyes squint in a deeper smile, so focused and intense that you almost don’t notice the way that John is glancing at you.

“Yes,” he says, relieving some of the tension between your awkward silence, “Do you have one?”

You turn to him, gazing at his profile, before you point, eyes glazing over the crowd as though you can’t remember who you’re looking for.

“I’m watching him for a friend,” you say, distracted by the happy wag of your dog’s tail in distant sunshine as you glance back at John as he nods.

You think of the beach, the sand crabs, and then of the guns that robbed you of that day and all others that could've been like it, and how much a dog enjoys playing in water.

You go silent again.

“...Name?” Johns voice startles you once more, just like when he first spoke, still deep and powerful, and you have to stop yourself from flying off your chair for a second time.

“What?” you turn your head toward him, blinking like a stupid, sitting duck. You never used to get distracted by boys.

“I said, do they have a name?” he smiles, hesitantly, almost kindly, even though you can tell that he knows that there is something deeply wrong with you that you are never going to explain. Not to someone normal.

Not to him.

“Oh,” you laugh, feeling breathless and slightly embarrassed, trying to play off the fact that you’ve already lost yourself again in that far-off world where you’re still on the beach, and still with the people you love. Even if it feels like a different earth entirely now that it’s gone, the sunshine at the park keeps reminding you of that day.

You thought you knew better than to play pretend, and you’re unsure of what to say, realizing very quickly that you don’t have a name for the animal, at least, not a new one, and you blink, nose scrunching, before trying to reply in a way that won’t make you cry, “I actually, uh… don’t.”

It’s not funny, but you laugh nonetheless, and as he raises an eyebrow at you in confusion, you do your best to smile, at least so he doesn’t question why.

“That’s strange,” he says, in the midst of your childlike giggle, sounding more confused than upset, “My dog doesn’t have one either.”

Though you fall into silence again, being stunned by his response, it’s only after you take another five, okay, maybe ten peeks at him at your side, do you find that you are no longer thinking of the beach, or of the blood that is stained on your hands, but on the fact that John seems to be glancing at you, too, and you don’t have to guess why.

He seems nice...

Kind of.

ii.

You dream of a man dressed in black, but you never see his face.

You are sad, and wake up with wet cheeks, but when you finally open your eyes, it seems as though the clouds did all the crying for you as it rains sheets outside your window.

You are going to die.

You are going to die, and the last thing you can think about is the man in your dreams, the dark suit he was wearing, and the gun in his hands, a Heckler & Koch.

You can’t say that you know what love is anymore, though part of you wants to say that one day, you could.

However, you’re still not really that hopeful for the future, and it’s been too long since your last… romantic adventure... that you don’t really think that dreaming of some kind of evil monster in a nice outfit really constitutes as being romantic, and hits the bullseye more for being creepy, instead, especially since you are about to die.

Besides, you’ve been thinking about John-From-the-Dog-Park (as you’ve taken to calling him) a lot more than you should’ve been lately, and it’s probably weird to be grouping the two of them together whenever you think about what it would be like to start dating again.

Deep down, you know that being in love would be too hard, as you’re busy taking care of a dog you did not want and still wake up screaming every night because of the way your last relationship ended. But there’s another factor that hangs heavy over your head, and it’s because you have since restarted the process of accepting dangerous jobs you know you’d might not complete again, all for some dumb gold coins.

And this is the part that’s not a dream, even though it all feels so similar.

Though you can’t say that you were expecting this outcome to be your end, it doesn’t really surprise you that you’re going to die distracted and lost on the floor of some restaurant bathroom you have never been to before.

You hadn’t wanted to start working again. In fact, even the thought of seeing that damn leaderboard one more time made you shake, but you couldn’t stop yourself from charging up your old phone and digging up your gun from under a pile of years old blankets after at some point deciding that there was no other way to move on from your past except than to die because of it.

And now, there’s nothing you can do to change your decision except to wait for the end and hope that your neighbors take care of your dog when they realize you didn’t make it back home.

They always said that life is fragile. That you had things to live for, goals to set. And in a way, they were right. You have a dog, and a long road to recovery, but if you were to make it, even if not very far, you had at least one more conversation with John-From-the-Dog-Park to make.

But you cannot ignore the gun in your hand, and the way your sweaty fingers burn with fever as you hold it against your chest. It’s almost as if the entire space around you is some kind of fever dream as you barely slid into the bathroom fast enough to hear the final shots being unloaded into your former coworker’s head just outside its door.

You are going to die, and it’s because John Wick is here, and everyone else who was hired with you to take him down is dead.

You swore to yourself that you’d stop taking jobs. You’d promised. But it’s hard to keep a promise when there’s no one to keep it for, and when you thought you’d gotten good enough at running away and then being presumed dead that you could always make it out of these situations alive. Not that Winston didn’t give you a monstrous earful when he heard your voice for the first time in years after you called to ask who is standing chairman, but… he believed you were dead, at least.

You had wanted to apologize for running away, but in the end, he was right. If John Wick can’t escape, then neither can you.

And that’s why you’re going to die: because John Wick is here, and you can hear his footsteps approaching the locked bathroom door from which you are hiding behind, and the only thing you can think to do is long for things that are just quite out of reach.

Peace, for one. Love, another.

In their absence, you forgot what it felt like to be scared. To be sad. To realize the fact that your dog would be alone once more in a world where you never get to see the beach again.

But beaches don’t usually have guns, and the one in your hands reminds you that it’s waiting to be used just as the bathroom door creaks open despite the prayer you made when hoping that it wouldn’t.

Even though you know that you should probably be praying, you can’t help but think of the man in your dreams instead; the ghost, his gun, and then the color of someone’s eyes. You can barely remember who they belong to before you’re finally able to squeeze the gun in front of your face as though closing your eyes might be a shield that saves you from dying.

From John Wick.

You think about John-From-the-Dog-Park, and it’s only when the footsteps stop and the room rings in silence as you look up and see him that your brave facade falters and you realize the truth.

“John!” You half sigh, half scream when you finally manage to pry open your eyes all the way to take in the sight of the familiar man dressed in black peering down at you as if he were some kind of half-wit assassin.

You can’t tell if he’s shocked to see you, as by the time he is opening his mouth to respond you have already climbed from your slippery spot underneath the sink and left your gun behind to dive straight into his arms and heave.

Bloodstained and sweaty, as your fingers wrap around his waist and you sob into his chest, it’s only when he rests his hands on your shoulders that you realize how you distraught you were at dying. Part of you wonders if maybe the reason you’re crying is because you’re relieved that now, you don’t have to.

“What are you doing here?” John asks, distressed, sounding like an angrier version of the person who always startles you at the park.

It would be scary, except that you do not care if he’s upset and ignore the question. Ignore the fact that John, your John (at least, the one from the dog park) is the John Wick and was this close to killing you.

You knew he looked familiar.

“I said-”

You shush him, finally allowing yourself to release him from your grasp, using your dirty hands to smear grime across your face as you try to clear your eyes and nose of snot, tears, and blood so that you can look him in the eyes. You don’t know where he put his gun.

“I thought you were just some random guy with a dog,” you laugh, the same way you do when you’re trying not to seem bothered, which is uncharacteristic for someone who was about an inch away from dying.

“I didn’t know you worked here,” he responds, unmoving.

When you try to continue to smile, it falters instantly when John’s face doesn’t change to mirror yours and his lips do not crook upwards even the slightest bit. If you were happy to see him, he looks almost enraged at seeing you, and you can only whisper in return.

“I’ve been meaning to quit,” you shrink backwards, your hands now at your sides, as you realize you hadn’t managed to think far enough ahead to wonder what you would do if you didn’t die.

Which you didn’t.

“I think… I should go home now,” you decide out loud, feeling as though the way he is staring at you in silence implies that there is still a chance he might kill you, but you continue to look in his eyes nonetheless, “But it was really nice to see you.”

You begin to hobble away, resting a hand on the cool wall next you while you stupidly turn your back on a man who you are well aware is not kind. A man who has lost more than most people could imagine. But you don’t worry, you don’t even have the energy to, and decide that if he kills you, it would probably be a good thing.

Besides, you’ve only really spoken a few times, and you know that you have both lost the same thing.

He’s just the one who did all the killing.

You stop walking.

“John?” You ask suddenly, not looking back, the empty air responding in the only way you need, “When you apologized to me, did you mean it?”

You can envision face, the way his lips are always in half a frown. You can see his hair, it being just that little bit too long. And you can remember his eyes, and how they look at you as though you are someone he thinks will never be normal, because they always look the same as when you were holding that damn dead body.

You didn’t even recognize him. It was a miscommunication. You were someone else.

But you know now. The dark suit, the Heckler & Koch, and the way he didn’t kill you. Again.

You look at him, and you realize the reason why he was saying sorry was because he had killed somebody who you had loved, and that he had known the entire time.

The realization makes the world spin, and what little light is shining in the bathroom begins to make you feel sick. Your eyes blur as you begin to cry again, your hands now too limp to wipe your face of the tears and your body too tired to keep you standing upright while you process the new information.

“John,” you gasp, just as you begin to collapse, reaching out for him in the hopes that you don’t end up on the ground.

While you do realize that there’s a lot you should probably start being angry at him for, such as how he robbed you of the one thing you’ve been holding onto for years, the only thought you can seem to process is how warm his body is when he does manage to take your hands in his and pull you to his chest before it’s too late.

Nestled in arms, it doesn’t take much of an effort to close your eyes and pretend that he is someone else, and that this whole night never happened.

John’s voice is low, his lips close to your ear when he finally speaks, killing your fantasy almost instantly, “You didn’t recognize me, did you?”

You continue to weep, shaking your head no while you cling to his body. There are words you wish you could say to him; angry, nasty words. Yet, for some reason, nothing comes out when he finally takes your face in his hands to look into your eyes.

“I’m sorry,” he says, before you can manage to speak, one hand back to holding yours, the other pressed into your hair. You’d feel guilty about this, as though you were the one pressuring him into responding this way, holding you like this, but you can’t bring yourself to move, and are so angry that you hope it hurts him to touch you like this, too.

You remember the beach, and how easily the sky can change from blue to red, and you suddenly think of the man in your dreams, the one in the suit, and decide that he sort of looked like John. At first, it makes you feel worse, and part of you boils with rage while you try to come to terms with the understanding of what he’s done to you. But there’s another part of you, one that you’re not sure whether to be grateful for, that also reminds you of how in love you could’ve been with the man you met at the park; the one with the happy, gray dog, if you had just decided to move on.

But it's not that simple, and these versions of people in your head just ended up being the same person.

Your body aches, but you shudder in relief when you finally release John’s neck, trying to avoid looking into his eyes one more time by using your dirty fingers to smear grime across your face. While you can’t say that you’ve forgiven John-From-the-Dog-Park for being John Wick, you still try to focus on the positives: that you are not dead, and you can finally go home to feed your dog in peace.

You should know better, as John breaks the silence first. John Wick, that is.

“Do you need a ride home?” he asks, reaching out for your hand. Though you want to say no, you can’t help but nod, still unable to look him in the eyes in fear of blushing at the man who killed the last person you loved.

iii.

Once again, it is a beautiful day. The sun is bright, and the sky is a beautiful blue. This time though, you are not at the beach, but at the dog park, and your dog is racing against the wind next to another dog you have seen before but do not know the name of.

You try to call out, voice swallowed by something you can’t place, but you don’t really mind, because it’s warm out and you feel sleepy. You watch as your dog runs towards another, a friendly looking gray one, and realize that John must be close by.

So you smile, feeling contented with this dream version of your favorite killer and his dog in a world where he is not a killer and you can be together...

But something doesn’t feel right, and you...

You...

You open your eyes to the sudden sound of knocking, before you realize it is too late to answer and the door to your house swings open in haste.

It is John, except this time he is not dressed in black and he is not covered in blood, and he looks so funny in contrast to the person you always think about, even if you’ve seen him in his pair of sweats before.

“Hi, John,” you smile, eyes closing again, chest stuttering slowly as you suck a breath through your teeth.

“Are you…” he pauses, seeming unsure about the sight that’s in front of him, “Have you been shot?”

“Yea,” You say, squeezing your eyes shut with your fingers pressed against your side. You know that you’re bleeding all over your ugly old couch, but for some reason you can’t bring yourself to mend the wound and save the cushions, as by this point, it’s probably too late to try.

“How?”

“You know…” you wave your hand around, blood trailing down your fingers, and you know that John is most likely thinking of the night when he decided not to shoot you and then of the next time he decided not to shoot you and instead sobbed in his arms, “Work.”

“I thought you wanted to quit?” he asks, though it comes out more as an accusatory statement than anything else. You wish you had a better response, a better excuse, but the only thing you can do is grunt, eyes closed, while you focus on trying not to bleed out.

You can remember the leaderboard and the assigned mission, firing your gun, and then escaping, but your memory stops at the part where you managed to get caught and then torn open by someone else with a firing weapon.

It’s probably not important now, because John is still hurrying to your side, seeming concerned if not just polite, and then lets you reach out a hand for him in a way that seems a little bit familiar.

“Hey, John?” you ask, not waiting for a response before you continue, “Do you ever think about how things could be different?”

He stays quiet, as you have noticed by now that he doesn’t usually respond to your comments, but when you open your eyes to peek at his face, he looks pensive rather than like someone trying to ignore you. He catches you staring, and his face twists in a way you cannot read.

“Yes,” he says, at this point now kneeling by your side.

You nod, your fingers wiping your sweaty face, and he reaches out with a cloth to wipe for you, as you’re sure there’s more blood than tears in your eyes now by the way his handkerchief stains red.

You remember the beach, and how the slaughter that robbed everything from you also gave you a dog, which in turn gave you the dog park where you first met John.

Life is a cycle, you think, and this is the part that’s always shown as an arrow instead of a picture.

Dying.

If this were a different life, and you were not an arrow, maybe John would look at you differently. Maybe you’d both have different jobs and he wouldn’t have to watch you bleed out on your couch as you slowly forget how you even got home.

Maybe he wouldn't have taken up two spots in your mind.

But this is your life, and you are dying, and the last thing you can think about is him.

“I’m going to call a doctor now,” he says, standing up, but you reach for him, grabbing his wrist with your bloody hand, smearing red across his arm.

He blinks at you, puzzled, confused, and you’re sure that he’s wondering why you haven’t passed out yet.

“Wait,” you whisper, blinking up at his face as he hesitates, “Tell me again what they call you?”

John looks confused, but humors you anyway, even though it's not funny, “The Boogeyman?”

“No,” you whine, though it ends up sounding more like a groan, “The silly name.”

“Baba Yaga?”

You attempt to laugh, but heave instead when the gasp you let out causes your wound to burn and forces you to let go of John. As you press your hands against your side, he pulls himself away quickly and sighs when you still manage to pout at him.

Though you recognize his behavior as kind, you still can’t help but think of what you did to deserve this; bleeding out and then being forgotten all over again.

You can remember the first night he walked away, the night when you were screaming so loud you were sure the whole of New York City could hear you. The same night you watched love die, and you don't even know if John was married at the time.

In your stupor, you wonder what his wife must’ve been like, and if you are anything like her.

“You’ll be fine,” John whispers, but his voice still cuts your thoughts in half as you notice that he is staring at you, distracted by something of his own creation as his large hands move to pull an ugly pink blanket from underneath your feet to lay across your wounded body.

You’re not sure if he’s right, but you nod anyway, despite the fact that by now, you can hear his footsteps heading towards the door, feel the fading of his warmth, and when you do manage to open your eyes in one final burst of anxiety, see as he has already turned his back toward you to open your front door to leave. This time, when you reach out for him, you are reminded of the first time you lost someone who you loved.

“John,” you croak, and he stops to listen even though one of his feet is already out of the door, “We should go to the beach sometime.”

He nods, and you watch his lips to see if they twitch upward, even though in some ways, he looks as sad as when you first met him on that day when he tried to apologize.

“Thanks,” you whisper, watching as he finally leaves, hoping that if he saw your smile, you had managed to swallow all the blood in your mouth.

He hadn’t smiled back.

iv.

You are at the beach again, except that this time, you know that you are dreaming.

Still, the sun is bright and the sky is blue, and the water looks extra beautiful with a happy gray dog that splashes in its waves next to one that looks like your own.

You do not have a bucket of sand crabs at your feet, or someone close to you in the water, but you know that there is a man dressed in black somewhere nearby and that if you were to look for him, that he would wave back at you.

Even at the distant sound of sirens that go off, which seem louder with every passing second, you smile, opening your eyes to look for him, hoping that this time, he doesn’t have a gun.

#john wick x reader #john wick #john wick imagine #please kill me #i never want to see this dumb fic in my life AGAIN

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fuzzbuns · 5 years

Text

Im in a bad mood because american education system is hell so im gonna ramble about stuff no one cares about for that sweet serotonin aka atsutodo* tho really just Mr Atsushi... Sir Joned arbuck-

*?... like i mean its lowkey atsutodo i will not front but realistically speaking im just gonna talk about thier relationship and whether you see it as platonic or not it is up to you but like just know in my minds eye MY GOD these bitches GAY.... good for them tho... good for them

I just legit don’t understand people who either think/ characterize atsushi as someone who is mean or doesn’t like todomatsu. Like the only person who legitimately should ever feel that way is totty but we will get there. like, i get not everyone stans atsushi and has been following him ever since that one tweet after ep 22 where he is shown baking a totty themed meal (srsly look at this. the second i saw this tweet back in like 2016 i was like “oh i love this dude”)

LIKE.... LOOK AT THAT.......

Ok so back to the point : like i get most people do not care to keep up with the guy who had 19 seconds of screen time in ep 22 LIKE I GET THAT but literally the very second you look at his characterization in literally anything it is just so clear that he genuinely likes totty and seeks out his company!

And like i know some people saw how totty reacted to him in the movie and went “uh.” But you guys are literally forgetting that todomatsu is a matsuno.... plus totty literally tried to maul his own siblings? IDK to me it just kinda shows to todomatsu clearly feels close enough to atsushi in order to treat him like his siblings because totty is the kind of person who values what people think of him (including atsushi. In ep 7 season 2 he literally is apologizing to atsushi even when atsushi isnt even there which means he clearly cares about whether he is on good terms with him or not) so like....? If he really didnt like atsushi he just wouldnt hange out with him. He just got pissed off,,,, not very deep. Plus atsushi didnt even react.... which to me is just like.... he is close enough to totty to know he is dramatic and is use to having totty be a drunk menace to society. Also? People think he was being mean with the whole ‘neetville’ thing WHICH LIKE..... WHAT ABOUT IT.... like im not even convinced he meant it like that but even if he did, he is just teasing them....it really not that deep..... it is one negative interaction out of the many postitive ones they have had and its is mostly totty who is making a stink (which is a common theme.... BUT THAT DOESNT MEAN HE HATES ATSUSHI WE WILL GET THERE)

Back to atsushi, i feel like seeing him in highschool made me kinda get his character more (tho its just my interpretation so idk. I literally do not know how they characterize him in tabi or the spin off because i just havent seen translations for that stuff? Tho i know i heard that in one of the tabi events he was in people said he was nice to totty (aka he was a good guy... like we have known this.) but thats like.. it.) We barely see him talk! He is super quiet! Which is... going back to the last part.... kind makes the lines he has make sense? I feel like he isnt really the best at taking the lead in conversations and isnt really even that good of a conversationalist but he knows what people what to hear so he just says that and it usually works out fine? Like he can fake it well, like when i write a paper and think “idk what im talking about” and then i get it back and the prof is like “wow..... this was.... breathtaking...” like thanks my head is empty! idk if that makes sense but he just seems like the kind of person who was forced to get good at conversing when he finished highschool in order to network and shit but like deep down he would rather not. Like he is friendly! He has friends and he likes being with them but i feel like if it was up to him he would be a bit more reserved. And the fact he likes totty kinda speaks to this?

Before we get to that i should probably prove he likes totty but i feel like it is so obvious i shouldnt have to..... he set totty up with the girls in ep 7, he apparently goes to the gym with totty every now and then and like. Looks forward to it. The hesowars sprite where he is waving totty as if totty was some kind of celebrity (in front of the girls who clearly dont want to see him. Like atsushi is so oblivious to the fact the atmosphere is awkward because he is too busy being.... gay??? Sorry homies i decided it is gay.) also the offical art of totty and atsushi on a totally-not-a-date.... even if you take the subjective gay subtext i put on there off its still obvious atsushi and totty hang out and atsushi puts effort in in order to do so. I feel like the fact he is still in touch with totty after highschool speaks to just how much effort atsushi put in to keep him around because lets be 100%. Todomatsu seems like a NIGHTMARE to actually have a stable friendship that lasts more than a year with. This is the guy who literally does not get the concept of friendship... and yet here atsushi is.....very much being his friend

I feel like unless you are someone who is very good at reading inbetween the lines/a good listener, it would be impossible to be todomatsus friend just because of the front he puts up. I honestly think since they are highschool friends, totty doesnt put up as much of a front with atsushi cuz like... he saw totty at his most baby..... like you cant come back from that. But totty puts up fronts even with his own siblings so he definitely still has to put up some kind of front with atsushi. So i think atsushi being this quiet kid in highschool gave him the skills to deal with totty. I KNOW THAT SOUNDS MEAN I PROMISE I LOVE TOTTY IM JUST BEING REALISTIC. when you arent doing the talking and you are just listening and taking in what people are saying you start to pick up on a lot of little things. And because atsushi knows what totty was like in highschool i feel like he genuinely understands todomatsu as a person. Like totty can act self assured and dismissive but we (and atsushi) know that deep down he really craves affection and validation. Which is why atsushi sticks around with him and even goes as far as setting him up on dates. Atsushi is a quiet dork at heart. I will not budge on this.

So like where does the asshole rich man idea of atsushi even come from?? Because atsushi isnt really like that (tho i will admit it is very funny... rich asshole atsushi is very funny i can not lie)? The line about him having a car never came off as snobbish to me tbh it just seems awkward (like you know... a quiet kid who is forced to converse). Remember how i said we would come back to that? We are finally doing it. Todomatsu matsuno has too many insecurities and he projects them on the people around him. Notice how we always see atsushi from todomatsu perspective! Totty see atsushi as the guy who always one ups me and takes girls from me.... the guy who said neetville,,,, the guy who likes to look down on commoners..... but .... totty isnt a reliable narrator. Todomatsu has a hard time seeing other people as being genuine because he himself cant be genuine. So when atsushi hangs around him, he assumes that he must be looking down on him, because why else would someone like atsushi wanna be around someone like totty :( (i suggest “because he is gay” but like-) i think totty genuinely likes atsushi but he is so self sabotaging that he cant accept the idea that anyone who knows who he is could ever want to connect with him so he tries to keep atsushi at a distance and lashes out whenever atsushi unknowingly proves his warped perspection of him (an asshole rich guy) right because the idea of someone using ur misery as entertainment is upsetting to say the least.

Its 2020 and i cant believe i just rambled about atsutodo but i was thinking about atsushi recently plus...... i dont keep up with the oso fandom but i saw shit about people who thought atsutodo was.... bad??? And like I genuinely just cant see how you could get to that conclusion? It doesnt have to be ur thing but to reach and say its somehow “Problematic” ??????? The only messy thing about it is just totty being a matsuno like..... atsushi is genuinely such a chill guy i just... its not clicking for me.

Anyway atsushi is a dork man. Quiet highschool kid rep. Coconut head king. jon arbuckle. And if he wants to hold hands with todomatsu matsuno?? Who am i to stop him.... insert image of fma love is love thumbs up

In fact after all the effort he has put in? He deserves to hold his hand..... AND TOTTYS HAND DESERVES TO BE HELD/??/

Ok i have work to do bye

#fuzzy rambles #im suppose to be writing an paper on stress #but i got so stressed thinking about it i decided to talk about atsutodo like a loser #also forgot to eat dinner so im gonna do that

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