#wtf i'm doing
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The internet has always been an objectively dangerous place, but that feeling of insecurity was barely felt before because most of the people you encountered online were friendly. Nowadays, I feel like it's practically impossible to find a space online, especially on mainstream social media, where someone can feel safe and unjudged. Obviously, there have always been problems and conflicts, but I don't feel like back then that was the norm as it is today. Social media used to serve as a false escape from the real world but nowadays, it's just closer to being an extension of the trash you might encounter when you leave your home.
#personal blog#loser core#otakucore#me core#my thougts#thoughts#sad thoughts#schizoposting#introvert#hikkicore#done with life#done with this shit#im so tired#mentally tired#im tired#tired#wtf i'm doing
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AM I MUST EXPLAIN IT????

AHH.. I knew it
⎛⎝( ` ᢍ ´ )⎠⎞ᵐᵘʰᵃʰᵃ
SO TRUE BUT HEY
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if someone asks me what I have done this year :
-survived (worked)
-drawn a tarot deck
-saved up some money to inchallah see a random performer in NYC with the slight hope he won't cancel
-the end
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I think people should be allowed to sleep in the same bed in a non sexual and non romantic way. I think cuddles can happen non sexually and non romantically. I think most acts of affection are non sexual and non romantic until you make it sexual or romantic (other than the obvious things like actual sex is sexual)
#arospec#aspec#aromantic#asexual#5k#6k#7k#wtf why do you like this post so much#8k#WHY DO YOU LIKE THIS POST SO MUCH#WHY DO YOU LIKE THIS SHIT I POSTED AT TWO AM WHILE SLEEP DEPRIVED#LIKE I'M THANKFUL AND ALL BUT WHY#most of the tags are edits/additions#9k#whyy#10k#11k#12k#13k#14k#15k
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AuDHD is so funny sometimes like what do you mean my hyperfixations/special interests will last for years on end or possibly forever but they will cycle out every month or two with absolutely no transitional period or warning. like i will think about the same topic every day obsessively for 46 days in a row and on the 47th day with no visible cause adhd brain goes "ok! bored of that now" and autism brain goes "dw i got something queued up for ya" and i blast into full blown obsession on some other topic whose mental file folders haven't opened in 9 months. brain's out here treating hyperfixations like a crop rotation. once the dopamine runs out it cycles in another one but once something's in the rotation it never ever leaves. last summer we brought in one from when i was 11. it's so funny to me but frustrating too bc like. i cannot stress enough my inability to predict or control this. or how completely abrupt and random it can be
EDIT: seems this is more common among ND people than i thought, and probably not limited to AuDHD specifically :] i was just describing my own experiences and didn't expect this post to blow up, so don't take me for an authority, but i'm glad it resonated with so many of y'all!
#actually adhd#actually autistic#audhd#aphelion.txt#ik 'adhd brain' vs 'autism brain' is a gross oversimplification especially given how much overlap there can be#but it at least helps me conceptualize wtf is going on in my head when i do this lol#and yeah i'm mostly referring to fandoms in this post but it can happen w more 'Traditional' special interests too#like my linguistics special interest which hasn't popped up in a couple years now but whenever it does#i will fill literal notebooks while studying 4 languages at once and simultaneously inventing a conlang#and then i'll be like Ok that was fun! and several months later im deleting like. 2gb of textbooks off my iphone to make room for an update#And sometimes yeah there is a precipitating event like 'Oh something new happened in X fandom with my blorbo!' but sometimes it's like#yeah. no. idk either. switch got flipped in my brain and X no longer sparks joy. only Y rn. how come it's Y? yeah idk i also wish i knew#i don't think any of this is actually an uncommon experience for people with these types of neurodivergencies it's just.#the severity of abruptness and TOTALITY of the switch that makes me feel like a weirdo sometimes lol#like I'M getting mental whiplash from this sometimes. idk how y'all are still following my blog
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gets in charge of the bookshop for 1 (one) day: shows up in a cardigan vest and metal sleeve garters, keeps the shop CLOSED, avoids selling a single book... iconic, truly did THE MOST, 10/10 😩👌🏻
(also, the way he was this 🤏🏻 close to finally achieving the status of house husband he's been dreaming about for MILLENIA just to have the rug pulled out from under him last minute... truly DEVASTATING 😩 my girl really can't catch a break 🤧)
#good omens#good omens fanart#crowley#anthony j crowley#aziracrow#ineffable husbands#neil gaiman#do you have any idea how hard it was to distinguish wtf he was wearing exactly#when this walking disaster idea of fashion is black on black on black on black??!?!!?#i had to up the lightness to the max#and i'm still not 100% on the details tbh#but oh well#I'm sure I made better choices than he did
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snowfrin <3
#in stars and time#siffrin#isat#isat siffrin#isat fanart#needle felt#soft sculpture#he's frolicking on a snowy adventure#so glad my camera captures snowflakes in detail holy moly they give me so much serotonin#dw he is safe and dry after a light pass with the blow dryer#i went outside multiple times with a clear file taped to my arm to prevent my camera from getting covered in snow#pretty sure cars driving by were like wtf this person doing#it was hella snowing#the things you do for art#i'm procrastinating my next projects send help :')#tumblr you get the photodumps bc you have the best layout!! <3#aysrin cant art
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[Day 277]
Chamber of sea critters 🎣 (im not obsessed with lineless u are)(its so fun KJASDLAJJKA)
#dddaily4sherin#desert duo#grian#goodtimeswithscar#hermitblr#hermitcraft#hermitcraft season 10#my art#this piece is the ultimate form of “I have no clue wtf I'm doing but it is fucking working so I'm not complaining”#so happy with this one fr HSHAEJKEHHE#(except the fact that i went with orange and blue again. i need to learn other color palettes istg LOL)
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my children
[ also post-ep-43-john design reveal!!! enjoy!! ]
#they make me want to tear my skin up#i love how unhinged i get in tags like this is ELITE content for the original post viewers#not really i just look mentally deranged#it's not like i'm any ok right#EP 53 WAS A STAB IN THE STOMACH WTF#kellin my goat i'm so happy we heard of him again🥀#typing this as i'm relistening to part 4 i'm not doing well gang#let's just leave this here#malevolent#malevolent podcast#malevolent fanart#john malevolent#john doe#the king in yellow#arthur lester#jarthur#malevolent privateeyes#artists on tumblr
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Color Psychology, Red;
Love, Power, Passion, Confidence, Aggression, Dominance, Attraction, Persuasion, Performance, Energy, Risk-taking, Unapologetic, Intense, Fiery
❤️ Happy Birthday j-hope ❤️
#Hoseok#j-hope#Jung Hoseok#jhope#BTS#BTSedit#BTSgif#sabedits#screaming crying throwing up this is the THIRD set I've made 'cause I didn't like the others I did and I STILL DON'T LIKE THIS#I'll post the other one too but fuck I'm over it#as soon as I had to scrap my MIC Drop idea I was just like WTF do I even do...#anyway#happy birthday to my man my star my hope!!!#even if I can't make the gifset I had in my brain I still love you so much and am SO excited to you next month yippee!
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SEVERANCE 2x10 | 🏃🏿♂️💨
#this was just fucking delightful#severance#severance spoilers#severanceedit#myedits#like wtf milchick i love you#i was tempted to fiddle with the timing and let him running away be at full speed but alas it is late and i'm tired#the humour in this show is just so up my alley#i love the idea of milchick being so fucking harried that he literally has to sprint from meeting to meeting like buddy#you had to sprint from the break room back to mdr to do a comedy skit with creepy plastic eagan#and then pop out a full sexy dance number and THEN fight with a vending machine like what a fucking day#are you okay
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toji taking little gumi to his first judo match and you know that toji is sitting in the first row with miki, cheering him on with strong words.
and by that i mean that he's not yelling, he's barely raising his voice but he the tone is just so confident, so sure and determined that it makes gumi feel stronger too. simple things like "c'mon, gumi." and "ya have him, ya have him." are enough to clear the boy's mind – there are so many sounds and noises all around him, he's not even the only one who's doing this right now. bright lights and what feels like a hundred pairs of eyes on him were distracting before, overwhelming. but when he sees his dad, clear as day, he knows he can do it.
taking a deep breath in, little gumi eyes his opponent while thinking about everything his old man has been teaching him. patience. the other boy is excited (though gumi is too) and he's more hyper, bouncing around, trying his best to grab onto megumi's attire but he keeps getting swatted away. toji's green eyes meet gumi's over the kid's shoulders and it's the final boost of confidence he needs – in two swift moves, megumi has the boy on the floor, signaling that the match has finally come to an end.
he hears the deep rasp and his head snaps to the voice.
"that's my boy."
he doesn't yell, he doesn't scream – toji now stands by the bleachers with a proud grin on his face with a cheerful miki right beside him. his voice is steady as ever as he praises his from the distance. megumi will never forget this moment.
(toji knows how flustered his son can get if he's under the spotlight and while it is, sometimes, fun to tease him just a little for it – he would never do it in a situation like this. he wants gumi to feel good about his win, he wants him to have fun. he wants him to feel proud of himself too.)
a tiny smile, the faintest one, creeps onto megumi's lips and toji's heart is about to give out. his boy. his son. his little blessing. he watches the coach? grab his tiny hand to rightfully end the match and to show the winner to the crowd around them and toji takes a mental picture of the sight.
gumi's hand reaches up high with the help of the man beside him and he looks like a proper winner. the little boy's cheeks are flushed red from the tussling and his outfit is all disheveled from being yanked around but he looks happy. toji couldn't be more pleased.
and then gumi makes his way over to his dad and sister with haste steps. his arms reach out for toji and he's quick to reciprocate, pulling his baby boy up into his embrace. he hold gumi's head to his neck, knowing that he likes to hide there whenever he's feeling a bit too much.
"ya did s'good, gumi."
tiny fingers dig into toji's sweatshirt and toji knows that megumi heard him. really heard him. he will, of course, keep saying it again and again throughout the day but right now, he just really needed to make sure that gumi knows.
tsumiki fiddles with the hem of gumi's pants and toji gives her a smile before ruffling her hair. her scrunched up face, makes the corners of his own lips tug ever wider as he rumbles out a chuckle.
"wanna go home now?"
toji scratches gumi's warm back in order to get an answer out of him and the only thing he gets is a nod against his neck. and that's more than enough.
#softsoftsoftsoftsoftttttt#i'm sorry this is not really proofread but i do love it a lot#wahhhh gumi the little judoka:((((#toji would love to teach him:((((((((#toji#megumiii#wtf mickey can write#toji drabble#toji fluff#toji fushiguro drabble#toji fushiguro fluff#jjk toji#jjk megumi#jjk drabble#jjk fluff
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Ace Kieran supremacy all the way!!!
I believe in asexual Kieran Duffy supremacy
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happy absolute flash day so hyped for this guy :P (original post under read more cuz i keep changing it ermmmm)


#wally west#dc#dc fanart#dc comics#the flash#wtf do you tag for him i'm still a newbie to this fandom#absolute flash#you got mail#variant cover so good i had to draw it in my style AUGH
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it took 6 months but there are Finally pins in the shop!!
these are available for limited preorder and will ship around mid december <3
#bg3#baldur's gate 3#astarion#volothamp geddarm#if they do well i'll keep them around permanently!!#i'm doing a couple of preorder things over the next month to get ahead for megacon#these would also be very cute stickers#edit: just went to post to bsky and they're already going wtf
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I have been sketching. So much tma. Here's some expansions on my Jon and Martin designs I've been doing.
Another note I forgor to mention is I love how after hearing Simon go "it's enough to make your hair turn white" about Martin's office in s4 many of us collectively agreed his hair turned white because of his association with the Lonely. The shared consciousness is real and we use it to play hot potato with the communal brain cell dedicated to the sillies.
Closeup of apocalypse boyfriends (also to the person who said they love my s5 Jon's fancy white girl updo: I think about that every day)
#s5 Jon in his white girl era#whatever the fuck that means#I'm still not done w the archives cuz busy n stuff but Jon needs to let Martin know wtf goin on#God may work in mysterious ways but you do not have to. Communicate with your man please#the magnus archives#tma fanart#tma#tma season 5#tma spoilers#jonathan sims#tma podcast#martin blackwood#tma jmart#jmart#jmart fanart#jonmartin#there's so much going on in these and I am not sorry welcome to my chaotic mind#hope y'all read the tags cuz I need to announce before I fully make my Jon character sheet that his favorite band is linkin park#it's so funny and just right#tbf linkin park goes hard I'm tired of pretending it doesnt#but come on he totally was totally an edgey prick when he was younger#and older. he hasnt changed huh#anygays he totally loves linkin park and type o negative and three days grace and green day and evanescence#georgie was a paramore girlie I just know it#wish gerry were here he and jon would jam to type o negative so much :( and jon could introduce him to this cold night :(((#ok enough byeeeee#sarag art
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