#y’all still know this meme right???

[cranberrytea451]

THANK YOU FOR 420 follows

[proudfreakmetarusonikku]

the thing with connor is that he’s, like, objectively right. george was making creepy objectifying comments to women in private he admitted to it. like he made a joke about fucking a friends girlfriend like. objectively, these guys did misogynistic as fuck shit and that’s what connor said. dream literally is just throwing shit at the wall bc he’s mad that connor thinks a guy who thinks women being treated as sex objects is funny is a misogynist and that he doesn’t trust the rest of the circle like dude what connor said is objectively correct you have been doing misogynistic things that clearly have upset other women! dream’s literally just getting people to harass a guy bc he’s mad that people won’t let him be a misogynist. fucking pathetic

[crossbackpoke-check]

i’m not sure if you’ve heard yet but nico’s tattoo is all of his family members’ astrological signs smushed together which is so… i’m obsessed

NO I HAD NOT HEARD!!!!! (partially because tumblr decided i was not to see people’s asks??)

oh my god. oh my god. that is so unbelievably. actually i take it back it is incredibly believable and i love that for him

[mattybsgroupie]

sleepover | matt sturniolo

contents: established relationship; handjob (m receiving); thigh riding (f); p in v; creampie; mommy kink; sub!matt

- ♡ -

notes: i wrote two dom!matt fics in a row i do not recognize myself. back to the sub!matt agenda, somebody has got to do it, i am the chosen one!!! (please it’s a trump meme) this is a silly little one i wrote cuz i’ve been dreaming some weird things these last few days and i’d very much like to fuck matt afterwards. not proofread but hope you enjoy it. always so thankful for every like, comment, reblog and follow, love y’all sm ♡ btw next week i might post a chris request i got idkkk

- ♡ -

i woke up out of breath, sweat dripping from my forehead as i tried to calm down. it was a nightmare - a terrible one, where i no longer had matt and no matter how much i’d scream, my voice wouldn’t come out. my phone buzzed, the screen lighting up the ceiling and part of my room. it was 3am.

i reached for the nightstand, first taking a sip of water and then grabbing my cellphone, checking my notifications. i had one missed call from matt and two other messages, which only read “babe, you up?”

i felt as the weight of the world had been lifted off my shoulders, my chest gradually lowering as i got more relaxed. i smiled and speed dialed the first number on my list.

“why are you awake!” matt picked up in a surprised tone, not really waiting for my answer. “i just texted you, did you feel it coming or something?” he giggled.

“hi, babe” i said, my voice still shaky. “i just woke up, actually”

“what happened?” matt asked me once again, clearly concerned as he heard how i sounded. i gulped and gave a few taps on my chest as i rested my back on the headboard. “what is it, hm? bad dream?”

“uhum” i nodded, even though he couldn’t see me. he knew i’d soon be curled up between the sheets, trying to fall asleep again. “what about you babe? can't sleep?” i asked, already knowing the response.

matt sighed and i could picture him running his fingers through his hair, trying to not upset me “anxious”.

“i’m sorry to hear that, matty” i pouted from the other side of the screen. “do you wanna facetime?” i suggested what we had done plenty of times. we’d be facing each other, talking nonsense until one of us fall asleep - of course, when things didn’t take a turn to either matt’s or my own horniness.

“actually… was thinking about coming over” i smiled, but he couldn’t see it. he always made me feel like a teenage girl, changing the reason of my nervousness to something silly, like him coming over.

“no way, you’re not getting the road right now” i said, playing hard to get.

“what?” matt sounded confused. “why not?!”

“it’s late and i worry about you” i responded. “don’t you have something schedule for tomorrow?”

“i don’t give a fuck” matt said, “i wanna be with you right now, do you wanna be with me?” i nodded and as if he could see me from there, he continued. “please, mommy?”

“i’m waiting!” i jokingly hang up on him after gasping by the nickname, as if it was too bold of him to call me that.

- ♡ -

i heard three knocks on my bedroom door and didn’t bother getting up. i rolled myself on the bed, waiting for him to join me.

“did i take too long?” matt asked, biggest smile on his face. he locked the door and quickly came next to me, lying down by my side.

“yeah, you know mommy doesn’t like to wait” matt widened his eyes, gulping at my words, realizing what he had done over the phone.

“i just said that so you could let me come over” he said, acting tough as he rolled his eyes before resting his head above my chest, snuggling into me.

“oh, that’s too bad” i pouted, my fingers running through his hair. “you got me all worked up…”

matt quickly raised his head, blue eyes staring at me in surprise, grin growing on his face. “did i? really?”

“of course, my good boy always gets me going” i teased, matt’s cheeks turning red. “why? you came here to sleep?”

“i mean” he started, grabbing my waist, turning my body over and changing our positions. he was now under me, his hands resting on my hips while i adjusted myself in order to get comfortable on his lap. “not anymore”.

matt leaned in for a kiss, holding the back of my head and bringing us closer. i could feel his beard slightly tickling my face as he deepened the pressure of his lips against mine, silently asking to go further by sticking his tongue and teasing me. i opened my mouth and matt’s tongue quickly slid in, the wet sounds taking over my darkened room.

one of matt's hand moved to my breasts, massaging it over the shirt. i gasped for the sudden contact, pulling away from the kiss, which led him to go to my neck instead. he trailed his lips down, altering between biting and licking my skin. my hands went to his hair once again, tangling my fingers on his curls.

matt lowered his head and stopped right above my nipple before looking at me with needy puppy eyes. i nodded vigorously, but instead of removing my shirt, matt hid his face underneath it, streching the cloth in order to fit inside. i felt his wet tongue teasing my nub and since i could no longer pull his hair, i rested my hands on his bare thighs. as matt started to swril his tongue, i threw my head back and couldn't help but start to move my hips forward, trying to get some friction to my already wet pussy.

i let out a moan when his free went to my other boob, his thumb circling the hardened nub that poked through the shirt. i wanted to look at him - wanted to see how his beard looked like rubbing against my skin, which color the hickeys he left would be, how much would the saliva run down my torso.

with my eyes closed and feeling matt sucking my tits, i tried to touch the hem of my shirt in order to remove it, i couldn't stand one more second without looking at his eyes again - however, my palm met something harder, covered by a soft fabric. i groped his shaft and received a muffled moan from matt, still busy in my tits. now with my eyes open i could finally take my clothes off, revealing matt with his messy hair, beard wet from rubbing his face against his own kisses, lips swollen.

“look at me baby” i called and carressed his cheek, “you said you wanted to sleepover and now look at you, already a mess for mommy...”

“i'm s-sorry, mommy” he started, “can't help it, you taste so good”.

“yeah? did you miss me?” i teased, starting to drag myself over his thigh once again. “we saw each other two days ago”

“it's too much” matt complained, hands going to my hips, helping me set a proper pace. “needy again”, he glanced at tent on his shorts, where my palm rested.

“is mommy's baby needy?” i almost mocked him and he nodded pathetically, but still not letting me take full control as he started to pump his legs' muscles, making my pussy clench. i opened my mouth, but nothing came out of it. matt's grip tighetned and he forced my body down, completely leading my movements.

“mommy seems needy as well” matt spoke, smashing his lips against mine. i let out a frustrated whine, wanting to feel more - i needed him inside of me. “aren't you?”

“yes- fuck” i said, trying to come back to my senses regain control of the situation “babe, be a good boy for me hm?"”

when i finally stroked matt's boner, his hands rapdly went to my ass, both palms groping it harshly as i entered inside his pants. i wrapped my fingers around his aching cock, and being the good boy he was, matt lifted up his hips, allowing me to pull down his shorts and reveal his hardened dick. he touched my waistband in response, silently asking if he could do the same to me. i mimicked his moves, letting the fabric slide down my legs.

“thought i had told you to not wear panties to bed” he said, pulling the strings of my underwear. “isn't mommy supposed to be good as well?” matt was driving me crazy with all the teasing.

i suddenly started to move my fist up and down, quickly jerking him off. matt was used with me starting slow and building up his excitement until he climaxed. but tonight, it didn't seem like he wanted to be treated kindly. matt threw his head back and closed his eyes, groaning loudly “f-fuck!”

i brushed my thumb over his tip, matt’s body immediately reacting, jointing his hips forward into my fist. i dragged my finger on his slit as matt’s nails dig into my skin, spreading the pre-cum down his shaft. his breathing got heavier, chest rising and falling quickly while he bit every inch of skin he could reach.

“not talking back anymore?” i asked, gradually stopping my motions, receiving a groan in response.

“mommy, don’t be mean” he pleaded as his sneaky fingers made their way to my entrance, pulling my panties to the side. he kissed my neck, making my eyes roll as i melted into his touch.

“matthew” i caught his attention since i didn’t really use his full name often. “stopping teasing so fucking much and just fucking say it”. he widened his eyes before letting the grin grow wide on his face.

“please, please, please” he said, “ride me, momma”i immediately got out of his thigh, adjusting myself to be in between his legs. i could feel matt’s cock being lazily dragged against my now bare pussy, panties removed as soon as i got up.

i lowered myself on his shaft, nearing my throbbing cunt to his leaking tip. both of my hands went to matt’s shoulders, looking for balance as his grabbed my hips, helping me fully sit on his length. matt’s dick was huge, stretching my walls as he hid his face on the crook of my neck, tickling beard making me giggle as i tried to adjust myself to his size.

“wasn’t so hard, was it?” i asked, getting comfortable to move my hips up. as i started riding, matt wouldn’t say a word, only muffling moans in my ear. he denied with his head, whining as i fastened my pace.

“c-close” he said, gripping tighter. “mommy- fuck”

“hold for me baby” i spoke, already out of breath, bouncing harder on his dick. matt decided to stick his face on my boobs and dragged his tongue along my skin, biting my nipple and holding me by my waist, jointing his hips forward in order to reach his high quicker.

“yes baby, just like that” i praised, matt now pounding mindlessly into me. “good boy, good boy” and that’s what took for him to snap, groaning loudly as his cock twitched and he released the knot on his lower belly, spurts of his warm cum filling my insides.

his spasms brought me closer to the edge, but i wouldn’t stop riding him. i kept on bouncing on his cock, now in search of my own climax. “mommy- mommy, fuck!” matt cried from the overstimulation. his whimpers got louder and so did my moans as my orgasm washed over me, mouth hanging open with my trembling body as i came over matt’s shaft.

i was too tired to remove myself, letting my weight fall over him. matt rolled us over, both of us laying in my bed. he turned to the side and pulled out, the mix of our realeases running down my legs and staining my sheets. matt let out a chuckle as he wrapped his arms around me, bringing me closer to his chest.

“should we sleep now?” i asked, running my fingers through his tummy.

“kid” he called, pointing to my bedroom widow. “the sun is already up” he spoke - as if this was gonna stop us from sleeping till noon. “but that’s why i came here, right? sleepover”

“of course, you’re always so clever” i rolled my eyes and giggled, allowing my body to relax next to his. i closed my eyes and knew that, while matt was around, the bad dreams would no longer come.

- ♡ -

taglist (drop a 🌸!): @thepubeburgler @submattenthusiast @pearlzier @mattsfavbitchhh @her-favorite @bugeyedgrl @mattswhore-44 @sturncakez @riowritesitall @joemamaaa42069 @mattttypooh @sturnsmia @sturnthepot

[coolestzed]

Alright, I’ve been holding this inside for years but I’m finally gonna say it.

Misako haters are actually fucking annoying at this point.

They always were to me, but now, they’re just OBJECTIVELY an annoyance. And they need to STOP.

They take literally ANY chance to slander her, even when it’s completely unwarranted. Like, I’d just look at a picture of her on Pinterest, and there’d be multiple comments going "the world’s worst mother". Or I’d see content about Koko and there’d always be comments comparing her and Misako and going like "Koko way better fuck Misako".

I’d even see a fucking meme and people would slander Misako. Like they couldn’t resist.

And that’s not even mentioning his people constantly make her seem way worse than she actually is. Im not gonna quote everything, but basically they act like she never does good things for Lloyd. That she doesn’t care about him at all! And it’s just- so WILDY out of character!! And it’s the same vice versa! I saw a funny Ninjago video the other day with a "your mom" joke and someone in the comments was like "jokes on you, Lloyd would never call Misako mom". I’m just?????? Yes he DOES????? ALL THE TIME???

People just act like their relationship is nonexistent! Like they don’t care about each other, or that Misako doesn’t care about Lloyd! Which is OBVIOUSLY not true!

People claim that she disappears every other season but the only seasons she was absent in are 12 and 13. Also, she has a job. She goes on expeditions. Obviously she’s not there 100% of the time. And she and Lloyd clearly spend time together off screen.

People don’t even acknowledge the reason why she left in the first place. They act like she dropped him off at a boarding school and dipped to take a vaycay. She was literally trying to stop her husband and son from having to fight to the death. You ever think about that? You ever think about how SHE felt in the situation? With her husband being consumed by evil and later being banished, and learning that he and their son would have to fight each other? She was HORRIFIED and GRIEVING! Ultimately she did it to save her family. It doesn’t make leaving Lloyd right but it’s understandable.

But apparently not to almost all of the fandom.

Most of y’all, completely ignore that, and everything else that came after season 2.

Misako constantly being worried about Lloyd in Tournament of Elements and Possession.

Both of them spending Day of the Departed together.

Her getting/building the Destiny’s Shadow as a birthday gift for Lloyd.

How she supported, fought beside, and risked her life for Lloyd in Hunted.

How she wanted to stay and fight with him during MoTO but only went inside because Lloyd urged her to protect the civilians.

Not to mention just their general interactions. THEY’RE ALWAYS HAPPY TO SEE EACH OTHER!!! Do you know how many times they hug?!

And this dialogue here:

"Aren’t you going to kiss your mother goodbye?"

"Mooom, we've-we've talked about this-"

WHAT MORE PROOF DO YOU NEED?!

Lloyd and Misako have a good, healthy and loving relationship. Misako has long since made up for her mistake and they’ve moved on.

Yet THE FANDOM REFUSES TO!!!

EVERYONE, TO THIS DAY, STILL TREATS HER LIKE THE FUCKING DEVIL!!!

I CAN’T EVEN COUNT THE NUMBER OF TIMES PEOPLE HAVE HAD OVERDRAMATIC TANTRUMS FROM HER JUST EXISTING.

IT MAKES ME SO UNREASONABLY ANGRY.

AND THE FACT THAT I’VE SOMEHOW BEEN SEEING EVEN MORE MISAKO HATE DURING AND AFTER MOTHERS DAY IS ACTUALLY APPALLING.

NOT EVEN FUCKING ENDEAVOR FROM MHA GETS THIS MUCH HATE AND HE’S DONE MUCH WORSE TO HIS FAMILY.

IT. HAS. BEEN. OVER. 16. SEASONS. AND. A. MOVIE.

GET. OVER. IT.

*deep breath*

Look, she’s not perfect. Obviously. She fucked up. But who in this series hasn’t? She came back, and she’s made sure to be a better mother to Lloyd. He forgave her, and they have a good relationship now. They’re close.

She wouldn’t be as hated if the writers didn’t do her dirty. Her introduction wasn’t handled the best, and having her and Lloyd have a more in depth discussion would’ve made the reunion and forgiveness feel less rushed and forced. That love triangle with Wu and Garmadon certainly didn’t do her any favors either. 😑

Regardless, her character’s gotten better over the seasons. Again, she and Lloyd and close and have a good relationship.

But hardly anyone acknowledges that, almost everyone in the fandom hyper fixates on that one mistake from years ago. They don’t pay attention to anything else. Like how she’s a better mother, or how she’s just a generally good person.

You aren’t supposed to judge characters or irl people solely on their past mistakes. Especially when they’ve already made up for them. Thats why the "Misako’s a horrible mother" statement is always bullshit to me.

Seriously, Misako’s been a part of Lloyd’s life longer than she’s been absent from it at this point.

The amount of passionate, unforgiving hate she gets is so undeserved and over the top. Too many people are projecting their own issues onto her. Or just being plain hateful. It’s not fair to define her entire character on a single mistake that she’s long made up for.

And it’s definitely not fair to people that actually like Misako. Often times on the few positive posts about her, there’d be Misako haters in the notes or reblogs complaining about her or insulting her, or just stating they hate her but love the content. And that is completely uncool and rude. It’s so unnecessary. You don’t do that, that’s so shitty. The again Misako haters have a habit of spouting unnecessary hate. Like it’s a terminal condition they have.

So, please, for the love of god, COOL IT. Stop and think, try to ACTUALLY look at her character without the veil of blind hatred.

If you still dislike or hate her, fine! But if you’re gonna detest her, at least hate her as she is and don’t make her worse than she actually is to justify hating her more.

And PLEASE stop bashing her at every turn, it’s annoying, upsetting, unwarranted, unnecessary, and just not good.

Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.

[callmelola111]

loser!ellie ♡ dating app headcanons

synopsis: totally sfw hc’s of loser!ellie (modern au) on dating apps, including a cute little 1st date scenario. basically just pure fluff !!!

      | 𓆣 | pairing & wc: ellie williams x reader. wc: 1.4k

a/n: never written headcanons before, crazy ass shit. idk if i did it exactly right but i think it will be an entertaining read no matter what. i’ve recently caved and downloaded hinge which is what inspired this---but there’s only like 40 gay bitches on there and that’s it (also like no mascs?? i’m attracted to any kind of non-man but still,,, the shortage is real y’all). ALSO let me know if this is something you’d like a nsfw/smut part 2 of. much loveeee ♡~ lola

| ❀ | loser!ellie who took weeks of convincing from dina and jesse to finally download hinge after she wouldn’t shut up about how she’s “never beating the loser lesbian allegations”. truly she could have any girl she wants but just doesn’t know how to speak to them in real life. they were so fed up with her bullshit.

| 𓆣 | loser!ellie who only has like 3 pictures of her actual face so the rest of the photos on her hinge profile are just art pics and gay memes

| ❀ | loser!ellie who had to beg dina for help writing all the little prompts just to reject all her ideas because she’d “never say something like that!”

| 𓆣 | loser!ellie who started getting so cocky as soon as those likes began to roll in. saying some shit like “ooo i have rizz” in the cringiest way possible. jesse just says it’s cause there’s a masc lesbian shortage and of course she flips him off in response.

| ❀ | loser!ellie whose cockiness immediately leaves her body when she realizes she has to go through the likes and accept/reject every girl. eventually she just gave up and stopped looking because it felt “too mean” and like “too much work”.

| 𓆣 | loser!ellie who SUCKS at responding to messages and likes after she lost all interest about 2 days into having the app. that is until she stumbled upon your profile…

✄ - - - -   ♡   - - - - 

| ❀ | loser!ellie whose glued to her notifications after she matched with you on hinge. at this point you’re her fixation, and every other message besides yours are going unanswered. as soon as she works up the courage to ask for your number, and you oblige, she immediately deletes the app.

| 𓆣 | loser!ellie who stares at her screen for like 5 minutes straight at the first text message she plans to send you, even though it was literally just “hey, is this y/n?”. she even googled the difference in connotations between hi, hey, and hello. it’s safe to say the girl is straight up mental about you.

| ❀ | loser!ellie who gets more and more unhinged as y’all get better acquainted with each other through texts. eventually she's spamming you with updates about her day, instagram memes that she thinks are funny, and an occasional flirty message—but of course, she’s waiting for that first date to really test the romantic waters. like yes she’s obsessed with you, but to the extent where she’s so scared to screw things up so every little move she makes is with caution and regard to your feelings and boundaries. it’s honestly super sweet.

| 𓆣 | loser!ellie who eventually asked you on a first date after you sent like 3 different flirty memes to get the point across that you like her a lot and wanna be taken out for real. you definitely were sending her some shit like this…

| ❀ | loser!ellie who planned out a whole agenda for y’alls first date so it would be absolutely perfect. she refused to tell you where she was taking you or what you guys would be doing because she thought it would be better as a surprise. and although you were kinda stressing about what to wear and what to expect, the element of mystery was kind of endearing.

✄ - - - -   ♡   - - - - 

| 𓆣 | loser!ellie who pulls up to your house in her little beat up sedan that she had cleaned for like the first time ever just before she came and picked you up. there was still clearly some reminisce of her mess as seen on the stained seats and crumbs on the floor, but you didn’t mind—yours was just as bad (probably worse).

| ❀ | loser!ellie who took you out for sushi as the first stop on your date, to which she graciously paid for even with you fighting to put your card down on the table first. she looked so adorable with her little california roll, and even cuter when she accidentally got too much wasabi in a bite and was fiending for water while simultaneously trying to play it cool in front of you. you just laughed which immediately made her feel better about the whole thing. 

| 𓆣 | loser!ellie who then took you to your town’s expansive park to walk the dirt trails and just talk. neither of you had ever gotten along with someone so well, the conversation was absolutely effortless. you talked about all your interests, funny life stories, your fears, and so much more. ellie listened attentively with nods and affirmations throughout which made you feel so cared for, something most girls on dating apps could never do. you extended the courtesy back and ellie told you all about her own stuff, including her obsession with space, to which she pulled out her favorite book on the topic to show you. space had never really piqued your interest before, but when it was coming out of the freckled girl's mouth, it seemed like the coolest thing in the world.

| ❀ | loser!ellie who sat next to you on one of the park’s wooden benches. time had flown by and neither of you had realized until your head was resting on her shoulder as the sun set in front of you. the orange cast hit her auburn hair just right and it looked like she was practically glowing. you couldn’t help but stare at her beauty which she noticed and with a concerned look questioned if she had anything on her face. you informed ellie of the trance she had put you in and she blushed the color of your pink nails just before leaning in to give you the most tender, loving kiss you’d ever received.

| 𓆣 | loser!ellie who couldn’t stop kissing you once she started. your lips remained locked with hers for a solid 5 minutes, lips puffy and saliva exchanging, until the sound of a dog barking a few feet away broke the exchange. the energy had shifted in the best way possible and the both of you quickly opened up about how much you liked one another. one thing lead to another and suddenly ellie has out her pocket knife and is carving an E + R (reader) into the wood of the park bench. how lesbian of you guys ♡

| ❀ | loser!ellie who didn’t want the date to end and you were right there with her, so you somehow found yourselves in an empty parking lot at 9:00pm, drinking slurpees while she tried to teach you how to skate. it started off as a real attempt with her teaching you the basics like where to put your feet and the importance of bending your knees. after about 4 different falls onto the dirty asphalt you gave up on your genuine pursuits. discouraged, you sat right down on the board, knees up, before ellie gave you a push and you rolled across the lot. she was laughing her ass off and you were too until you hit a bump and tumbled off. 

| 𓆣 | loser!ellie who bolted into the CVS the parking lot belonged to and bought a bunch of unnecessary first aid items for the small cut on your knee. she came back out of the sliding doors and you died of laughter as she pulled out a box of peppa pig bandaids for your skating “injury”. ellie insisted you needed to be taken care of though, so you let her do her thing and she finished it off with a small peck to the cap of your knee and one on your forehead.

| ❀ | loser!ellie who spent the trip back to your place with one hand on the wheel and the other on your thigh, driving you absolutely wild. you almost had to remind yourself that this was just the first date.

| 𓆣 | loser!ellie who had been parked in your driveway for 10 minutes already but continued to stall your departure with more of her shenanigans. soon she ran out of things to say though and leaned over to kiss you goodbye. this goodbye turned into more and you ended up in her lap before the night was over. it wasn’t until your back hit the steering wheel making the car honk that you finally exited the vehicle. 

| ❀ | loser!ellie who waited for you to completely make it inside before she drove home, giving you a final little wave as you opened the front door. after she was back at her place she instantly texted you about date 2 and thanked you for the best night of her life. in her eyes, you were a keeper!

✄ - - - -   masterlist   - - - -   ♡

taglist...

@endureher @gold-dustwomxn @alexpritch @4rt3m1ss @robinismywifee @sophlovesbooks @97cityy

(taglist is for all callmelola111 works, if you'd like to be removed just kindly lmk)

[robohintz]

Funniest thing is watching people backtrack now, when he first posted that y’all were praising him for his ‘sassiness’ then y’all saw what he was replying to and that poc’s were not amused and y’all immediately tried to say he was hacked and then when people pointed out that he posted -> then went on a blocking spree -> and then went on his IG to delete said racist meme posts that there’s no way it could be a hack; now it’s “well obviously it’s photoshop” or it’s “still a hack but Buddie’s are the ones who hacked him y’all are so desperate”

Mind you, this man was confronted by a Black queer man and you all still tried to make it about a ship war? And that’s the person you’re trying to blame for said hacking?? Are you all that stupid? (Don’t answer that, it’s rhetorical- I know the answer)

Y’all are actual weirdos who are doing their absolute best to defend a racist white man- am I shocked? No because when those memes first came out about him the first thing y’all did was literally made posts defending him or deflecting entirely from the situation. Y’all nasty right along side him tf you mean.

[collywobbles-n-whatnot]

Extra Extra! (various yandere x reader)

Trashy Journalist! Reader x Rich nepo! Yanderes

You were a journalist (if you can even call yourself that) for gossip rags, infamous for getting the scoop no matter the danger. So when the opportunity comes along to go to the exclusive Hail Mary college you take it. Your contact set you up with a fake identity and background to make sure you’d fit in just so. This was the school for the elite and a last ditch effort of parents to straighten out their kids before handing over the keys to the kingdom. While being higher education this place much more reflected high school with its strict class requirements and uniforms. Most people haven’t even heard of it — it’s not even google-able, that’s how exclusive this shit is. Cracking this case wide open would mean you and your parents would be set for life. Little did you know that this would change your life forever but not in any way you could fathom. 

There was Clayton, one of the first friends you met when starting. He focused on sports and shared his American snacks with you. It was hard to smuggle that sweet sweet red 40 but it was worth it. Soon he asked you to come to his games, he played as many sports as he could get his hands on and excelled in all of them. Practically, wrote the book on golden retriever energy. The sexy southern drawl made sense since his family were frackers in the oil trade. Games turned into study sessions, into movie nights, into sleepovers. He was just a touchy guy, it’s not like it meant anything. It was hard to get the scoop on others without blowing your cover with him all up in your business, but he was protective in an older brother way that felt useful for now. 

You knew Hendrix before you even met him. Somehow even though he was just about as old as you, he had already reached rock god status. He always knew a way to sneak out of class and a new place to hide a flask. Not to mention you could throw nearly any instrument at him and he could bang out a melody that could make a secret service agent cry. That isn’t the only banging he’s fond of either. His extra circulars included Carmen, Tiffany, Pauline, Brooke, etc… He even tried to sway you the second time y’all bumped into each other. In a low moment you might have let it happen a time or two but that was the end of that. He was okay with putting an end to it as long as being friends was still on the table. Hend was a little gossip and loved to talk shit with you so you kept him around. 

Arthur took more time to ware down than you’d like to admit. He began as your tutor in just one subject and then he realized that you were utterly useless in nearly all of them. Letting a dweeb like you under his care fail would besmirch his good name so he set aside a couple hours every day to go over the material with you. He was an academic at heart, a real old money type. Doesn’t need to try for much of anything and can just skate by knowing he is better than everyone else. You were the first person not afraid of his title, when he tore into you- you’d give it right back. The study sessions got longer and eventually branched out from the library. Sometimes it was a cafe in town or a bookstore, maybe your dorm or his. 

Brayden was a loud personality tolerated by few at this school. He was new money and not worth anyone’s time. That is, except yours. His wealth may only go back a generation or two but his tree still has some bad apples and questionable soil. The good news is that he’s really actually brilliant! Unfortunately, he’s also spoiled beyond belief. He wants what he wants when he wants it. He texted you, like a lot. Memes, texts, u up?’s, anything and everything. He was clingy with a capital C. He’s always leaving little gifts around for you. A little robot that dances for laughter, a watch that doesn’t tell time but shows various pictures of him like a slideshow, even a camera disguised as a teddy bear. You failed to understand the inner machinations of his mind but couldn’t help but respect it, weirdness and all. 

Haruki actually walked you around your first day and stuck around ever since. He was an extrovert if you’ve ever seen one. Despite his minimalist and conservative clothing style it didn’t stop you from noticing the crazy ink he had all over his body. The tattoos peeked out around his neck and wrists even though he tried to cover it up as best as he could. He would have to try a lot harder if he wanted to hide the fact that he was primed to take over the yakuza for his father. It was hard to imagine this guy drawing blood, he was just so down to earth and chill. While his family was clearly suspect it seemed like he planned on doing things his way and while you can respect it, it doesn’t make for good ratings. When you tried to pull away he would always pull back just a little harder. 

Liam was just a normal guy. It seemed that the fame and riches didn’t effect him at all. His family had a generic generational wealth of one patriarch using the last’s money to create a business and passing it down, wash, rinse, repeat. While this appears like a dead end, there’s a sort of edge to him that keeps you coming back for more. He knows the secret passage ways in the school and takes you through them regularly. Sometimes to get extra dessert from the mess hall after hours or to over hear a conversation in the den, he was a real one and usually down for just about anything. And I mean anything. It definitely bothered him that he didn’t have any particular skills or any real motivations but you were supportive in a way he wasn’t used to. It never really mattered if he tried because there was no real winning or losing. You were his rock in his uncertainty. 

Your English professor preferred that you call him by his first name, which then he clarified that he wanted the whole class to because if it were just you that would be weird and not appropriate. Anyway, Lysander was tweed jackets and Oxford shoes. A typical round glasses wearing teacher. He helped you out with a point or two on a test and sometimes you have tea with him at his house just off campus. You helped him find his lost cat one evening and he found your company preferable to the silence (which wasn’t usual for him). The more times you visit him the more you get the feeling that he’s hiding something though. You have a radar for this of course. It’s not something he wants anyone to know, which meant you were going to do anything in your power to find out. He was of humble origins like you but a story is a story nonetheless. 

[dollfaceksj]

please i need to know what happens next in toapp

hang on tight!

ignore any errors . don’t say anything or ur cloverphobic. i was not in the right headspace when i wrote this and im still not kncjdnxks

warnings: :)

taste of a poison paradise | jjk (m) #12

masterlist

<- previous ; next ->

you walk up to the table and yoongi instantly turns to you, pulling the chair out next to you to help you sit down

you quietly thank him and sit down

you start eating, talking, enjoying everyone’s presence

you notice the food is rapidly disappearing so you make a quick sandwich for jungkook

just??

just because

NOT FOR ANYTHING WEIRD!!

he just!

helped u at night

made u feel warm

and gave u his pillow while u were sleeping :(

so you just

wanna make sure he has some food :(

are you becoming … soft ? on JUNGKOOK?

no ur not! it’s just human decency

“how’d you sleep?” yoongi asks, reaching out to play with the shell of your ear

you smile at his touch. “i slept well. you?”

“okay. hoseok punched me in the mouth 3 times in his sleep.”

you laugh and reach out to rub his swollen bottom lip with your thumb. “it’s okay, your lips look softer now.”

a small smirk creeps on his lips. “you wanna test that theory out?”

you press your lips together and your thighs.

you shrug your shoulders. “will i get anything if my theory is correct?”

he thinks about your question for a moment. “i’m not sure. is there something on your mind right now?”

ugh he’s so smooth

you roll your eyes, slapping his knee under the table

jungkook joins later and doesn’t really look at anyone as he sits down across from you

he looks around the table and notices the food is actually gone

you reach for the sandwich on your plate and hand it to him without a word

he glances at the sandwich in your hand

and then glances at you

he slowly reaches for the sandwich and quietly thanks you

he eats it in silence while everyone is still chatting

cue mouse eating alone meme

hours have passed

everyone’s playing pictionary with each other

jungkook is just sitting in the back on his phone

it’s weird

well he’s always been quiet in group activities

but now he’s not playing along at all

isabella and hyunjoo are sitting next to him and he’s only really chatting with them

lol

not like u care though

just as you’re laughing at the competition of pictionary in front of you

you suddenly get tugged to the side by tae

he pulls you to the side, away from the others

you frown and cross your arms. “what’s up?”

he looks to the side to make sure no one’s listening

???

“what’s up with you and jungkook?”

he asks it with so much annoyance in his voice

heart drops to your ass

what

WHAT

oh shit?

nothing happened between you and jungkook yet!!

wait

yet?

LMAOOOO

nothing WILL happen between you and jk.

believe that.

“what are you talking about?” you ask, feigning innocence

he sighs in exasperation, trying to find his words. “i know y’all are not the best of friends but i’m sensing some tension. are you still mad about the fact he said that he doesn’t like you?”

?

you blink at him

wait

wait

wait a second

oh

he thinks there’s a problem between you and jungkook

he’s not suspecting the opposite

okay

you can do this

you shrug your shoulders. “i just don’t like him, tae.”

he tilts his head to the side and squints his eyes at you, staring at you with his intense eyes. “so, why did you accept sleeping in a tent with him?”

shit shit

think this through

you drop your arms. “because i’m not a little bitch, taehyung. i’m not going to ruin the trip for everyone else.”

“well, you’re going in that direction. you think i didn’t notice that little never have i ever game between you two?”

you swallow in distress. fuck

were you that obvious?

he shakes his head at your lack of response. “get your shit together, y/n.”

you rub your forehead. “sorry.”

he sighs, he never likes having to call you out but you clearly needed to hear it

taehyung leaves you by yourself

well

he’s right

let’s try building a friendly relationship with jungkook!

you help seokjin and joon with preparing the food for tonight

you’ve kinda been ignoring jungkook in hopes no one else will catch onto the games between you two before you can tell him in private to stop w the games and act friendly with each other

because tae is suspecting something

during pictionary you were just teaming with yoongi

flirting with him

being touchy

now you’re spending time with the others

hoping that you’re not the reason for ruining it for everyone

so you’re going out of your way to interact with everyone

you’re laughing and having a good time

you taste seokjin’s food and hum in delight. “that’s so fire,” you moan

he smiles and puffs his chest out proudly

“oh, you wanna taste too?” seokjin says to someone behind you

you look behind you

:)))

jungkook is walking up to the 3 of you rn

seokjin hands you the spoon holding the broth so you can give it to jungkook since you’re closer

you blink as you take it and turn back to face him, holding the spoon up to him

instead of taking the spoon

he

grabs your wrist

and leans down

directing the spoon to his mouth

and sucking the broth off of it whilst holding eye contact with you

you gulp and you can swear you hear your heart beating in your throat

he drops your hand and nods. “that’s really good, hyung.”

seokjin beams at the compliment

but not for long when seokjin has to redirect his attention to namjoon

namjoon + knife = danger

suddenly jungkook leans into your ear and whispers, “come to the tent at 8pm. then i’ll know you’re done with this childish game and ready to hear me out.”

??

hear him out?

about WHAT?

did tae already speak to him too?

he doesn’t give you a chance to ask when he suddenly ditches you to head toward his tent

you check the time

it’s 7.30pm…….

be normal!!! don’t go

don’t go

don’t go

okay!

so are you gonna tell the audience

why you’ve been standing in front of the tent since 8:06pm?????

minutes pass

and you’re still not entering

8.06pm…

8.09pm….

at 8.10pm, the tent unzips and you watch as jungkook crawls out

he stops and looks up at you as you stare down at him

well

he’s seen you now? just go

hear him out

he slowly backs into the tent and you don’t really think about it when you follow him further into the tent

you zip up the tent and watch as he backs up and sits straight up, legs stretched out as he leans back on his hands

you sit on your knees as far away from him as possible, waiting for him to say anything but he won’t

it’s quiet

too quiet

your eyes drop to his lap

and you catch the slight tremor in his leg

you finally break the silence. “why are you bouncing your leg?”

he shrugs his shoulders nonchalantly. “because i’m nervous.”

your brows pinch together. “why are you nervous?”

why?

what is he thinking about?

should you be nervous too?

he sighs and rubs his face with one hand before placing it back and leaning on it again. “because there’s a pretty girl in my tent and none of my antics or tricks work on her.”

uhh

wow :)

okay

we’re good

WE’RE GOOD.

well

maybe…

maybe it’s best to just finally be honest?

sigh

just be honest

you shake your head. “but they do work.”

his head snaps up at you. “what do you mean?”

you awkwardly shrug your shoulders. “remember the time when i came to your apartment for the speaker? when you almost kissed me?”

he frowns but nods his head nonetheless.

“i would have let you.”

wow

u actually just admitted that

he blinks at you like he doesn’t believe you

“there are a lot of times where i would go with the flow but you just,” you say as you shake your head. “why do you never just.. do it?”

he shrugs his shoulders. “i don’t know.”

this space is so … raw and vulnerable right now

it’s best to just talk about everything

you ask, “is it because of taehyung and namjoon?”

he shrugs his shoulders for the nth time. “probably. i feel like i just don’t want to be the one that makes the first move and disobey them, you know?”

hmm

is that why he always stopped before it got too far?

you bite your lip for a moment. “so what if i make the first move?”

he shrugs his shoulders. “how about you come find out?”

well

that’s it

every bone in your body

every thought in your head

that makes you act rationally

leaves your body in that specific moment

you don’t waste any time as you crawl over to him

you watch as he suddenly sits up, big eyes watching you

you throw one leg over his thighs, hands on his shoulders to support yourself

he keeps his hands respectfully besides his body as you climb onto him, looking up at you in anticipation

you slowly sink down on his lap, straddling his thighs as you cup his face

jungkook stares at you with big eyes, lips slightly parted

if you were crazy

you’d say you could hear his heart beating out of control

it could also be your own heart

but without any hesitation

you press your lips to his

oh fuck

his lips are so

damn soft

his hands automatically move on their own, gripping your waist tightly as he allows you to taste him

fuck

his hands on your body

feel otherwordly

you pull his face even closer, tilting your head to kiss him deeper

you poke his lips with your tongue and he wastes no time allowing you into his mouth

you lick into his mouth, tasting the minty toothpaste he brushed his teeth with after the late lunch he had

you need more

you need more

you move your hands down to his and push them further down, making him grip your hips

he smiles into the kiss, wasting no time as his fingers drape over your hips

his lips chase yours as if he’s scared you’ll slip through his fingertips

you wrap your arms around his neck to fully close the gap between the two of you, your chests firmly pressed together

you slowly start rolling your hips into his, making yourself moan and him hiss

fuck you need to stop

before you do something dumb

he abruptly pulls away whilst shaking his head

what

oh no

his big black eyes stare up at you

“you’re playing a dangerous game.”

well

he’s been playing games with you all this time?

a smirk tugs on the corners of your lips. “what? getting cold feet because you can’t handle a little friction?”

he raises his eyebrows, clearly surprised by your provocative words

he doesn’t like that

suddenly in one swift move, he flips you over

a yelp leaves your mouth when you’re being pushed back

you’re suddenly on your back against the floor of the tent

and jungkook has wedged his hips in between your thighs

oh fuck

you’re trapped under his body

and unfortunately

you don’t wanna be anywhere else

he reconnects your lips and gently grinds into you, making you quietly moan into his mouth

holy shit

your entire body feels like it’s on fucking fire

pathetic whimpers and pornographic moans leave your lips as he rolls his hips against your pelvis, the thin fabric of your leggings making it feel like he’s grinding directly into your sex

his tongue dives into your mouth, sensually rubbing against yours whilst he grinds his sex into yours

his tongue continues to explore your mouth, the cold of his liprings rubbing against your lips sends electricity right up your spine

he disconnects your lips and starts kissing down your neck, tongue tracing your collarbones

his hips continue to roll into yours at a perfect pace

he’s so fucking good at this

oh fuck this feels good

no wonder. he’s literally a fuckboy

everything feels that much more intense because you shouldn’t be doing this

shouldn’t be doing this

wait

why shouldn’t you be doing this?

wait

oh

what if

someone were to come right now???

what if tae or yoongi suddenly stand in front of the tent!!! ask you to come out !! see you with messed up hair !!! swollen lips !!!! jungkooks red cheeks !!!!

no

no

panic

panic

panic

“wait, wait, wait, stop,” you say, pushing your hands against jungkook’s shoulders

he pulls away and worriedly looks down at you, his hips also coming to a halt

it’s clear he thinks he did something wrong

“i-i want to keep going but what if someone comes right now? looking for us?” you ask, breathlessly

he blinks a couple of times, clearly thinking about what you just brought to his attention. “then we’re fucked.”

DAMMIT

you’d hoped he could dismiss that thought so you could keep going

but now you’re worried

calm down

and think

just

think

to be continued

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[brandogenius]

Mmmmm what about, headcannons on your interpretations on the different ways that the boys would ask you out/ you would ask the boys out?

Other thoughts:

I think that regardless of what she did, julien would say “ Can I be your girlfriend?” ( Idk why it gets me all melted and shit, probably cuz we’re used to “ will you be my girlfriend”)

Imagining Pheobe who’s the friend that would spam your comment section after you post something ( barking like a dog frfr)

And one time she replied to another commenter who went “one chance🙏🏽” and she replied “she’s mine, can you fight?” or something and y’all were in the same room. You looked up from your phone and went “ I’m yours huh?”

Pheobe: ” yep”

You: “Okay then”

Then you replied to her comment “ hers❤️ I would still recommend you know how to fight though.”

LUCY I imagine she sat you down at her house. Maybe she’d set up a backyard movie. Reasoning being to play an unreleased song. You didn’t know why she was so nervous, she pulled out her laptop and a projector started playing a video with the song in the back onto the wall from the projector. At first it seemed like a song about yalls friendship.

As the montage went on with the pictures and videos, and the song got more personal, you realized that, this was a confession?

Then at the end of the song, there was a voice snippet of lucy talking, saying how she was grateful that she met you and how she’s so glad you’re in her life. Then she mentioned the first time she starting feeling differently towards you compared to anyone else, and how nervous you made her. Then at the end she pops the big question.

-🐹

OOOOOO!!!

‼️RPF‼️

HC - the boys & reader - asking you out

[Phoebe]

phoebe would be the type of person just like you said ^^ you’d post cute photos of yourself and phoebe would be your number one hype dude in the comments “BEAUTIFUL” like that lady gaga meme “AMAZING TALENTED BEAUTIFUL GORGEOUS”

the two of you would go off to this nice little beach and take some photos but you see phoebes story just as she posts something and it’s a photo of the beach but you’re in the background and she has a heart on it. “that’s cute” you showing phoebe her story, liking it. “nah. you’re cuter” this has you lifting your head, phoebe grinning at you. “am i now? say, it is kinda late huh? what about we get some dinner? me and you” you kinda were hoping she’d understand where you’re coming from.

“yeah? like a date?” she’s smirking and you nod your head, not being able to get a word out before she’s grabbing your hand and dragging you to the nearest restaurant”

[lucy]

lucy is the type to be like play flirting with you ALL THE TIME same like phoebe but mostly irl if it makes sense? two of you could be cuddling together bickering like an old married couple. phoebe gagging in the corner like “get a fucking room” the two of you just cuddled on the couch, hands twirling some strands in your hair. lucy taking fake offensive to phoebes comment like “damn. you really are being homophobic right now - you hearing this shit?” and she looks at you and you’re nodding your head like “i can’t believe this shit”

she’s like “i can’t believe you’re being mean to me and my girlfriend” and it has everyone raising an eyebrow like 🤨🤨🤨 and she’s like “i mean - uh “ and turning to you and you’re there like “take me out to dinner first sweetheart then we’ll go further” and she’s like “say no more. tomorrow 6pm”

[Julien]

jb would be waiting for the perfect moment. to she’s been preparing ALL WEEK. getting hype from the boys “you can do it! you can do it!!” i like to imagine you work in a flower shop🤭🤭 so she walks in one day looking at the flowers trying to hype herself up to talk to you. not even realising you’re watching her with that small smile on your face.

“you looking for anything in particular?” this kinda startles her so she grabs the first bouquet she finds and hands them to you like “yup yup wanna buy these” and you’re laughing to yourself like “these are the display flowers. are you sure you were looking for these?” and she’s cringing at herself like shit fuck shit- “would you like to grab a coffee with me? maybe now- or later after your shift if you’re free- because if not that’s totally fine” but you’re stood there like :o and juliens there like inner monologue is spongebob screaming in that office as it goes up in flames.

“i’d love to” you say “i actually finish now so it’s perfect timing”

[tokkiiecloud]

lol, so I saw a few posts about Belphie’s card and went on the game just to see him, saw the prologue and..I couldn’t stop laughing from the MC and the kings just like “WE NEED THEMMM AHVSHSGDJDHJDHDJ” so here I wrote this small thing lmao :

Running away mission :

It was a normal day in hell, actually heaven no it wasn’t at all, this weird phenomenon dude appeared and for some reason ALL the kings turned beastly! The only ones that aren’t on my track are Lucifer ; Belphegor and Asmodeus, which is the biggest Blessing ever! Now to escape those breeding crazed maniacs….

First one to dodge is Satan, which is actually pretty easy just steal one of his motorcycle and run away while looking extremely badass.

Second Mammon. After arriving at Tartaros, just gotta find a teleporter (sadly in the palace) and end up in Abyssos…

Which third and probably hard one Beelzebub, this fucker as an extraordinary scent, so maybe if I go see Bael while dodging the other three who might try to capture me I’ll be able to get out of here just avoid those freaking flies at all costs!

Okay made it out and now I’m…in Hades…WHY SO MANY PEOPLE LOOKING FOR ME?!—

Something grabs Tae Hyun as they float in the air and start punching the air very aggressively :

“FORAS! YOU CUTE BASTARD!! LET ME GO THIS INSTANT!!”

“My apologies…I must take you to see our Majesty I have been running around to get you all day you’re not very easy to catch…and you also go too fast on a motorcycle I fell off…” Foras feels sick, remembering the moment they had hoped on the motorcycle, happily blushing to be able to be so close to the son of Solomon, when suddenly he hears a shout and Satan was chasing them with another motorcycle, while laughing maniacally and Tae Hyun had pumped up the gas and he fell off-

Tae Hyun struggles as another man grabs them using roses ivy, his voice as bright as the sunshine.

“Haha! You really made our poor Foras run around Son of Solomon!”

Tae Hyun glares at the man and pouts angrily, “I’ll find a way out just you see!”

Arriving at Leviathan’s palace, he personally ties up Tae Hyun :

“I’ve been in your head, I know how you think. You were tiring to catch but now I can finally have you to myself to win the contest.”

“Do you really think so? Cause I’m already gone~”

*illusion dissipates and a laugh echoes through the palace*

“…they’re in the walls..! THEY ARE IN THE GODDAMN WALLS?!”

(I had to use that meme I’m sorry)

“Finally! Successfully escaped! Now I’m back to Tartaros…”

A golden hand suddenly appears under Tae Hyun grabbing them :

“Mammon….” They said.

“Master! I found them” He said smiling with his phone out

On the other side of the phone call was Levi, Beel and Satan

Levi : “Hey make sure they don’t suddenly disappear!”

Mammon : “of course I wo-…Master?”

The golden hand had dissolved and Tae Hyun disappeared along with it.

All of the kings : “…”

“they were right on the teleporter weren’t they?” Leviathan asked.

And then that’s when they call Belphegor! And after that they were on their way to Abaddon until Belphie decided to use Monster #7’s power to get Tae Hyun who were scared as hell cause they are scared of the dark.

And also they ran to Bathin and Andrealphus the moment they saw him like :

“Huh…wtf? *looks around* …..*spots Bathin and Andrealphus* BATHIN AND BABYGIRL!! 😭😭”

*runs to hug them, completely ignoring Belphie and Beleth*

“Am I in Niflheim??” Tae Hyun asked not letting go Bathin smiles and pets their hair and Andrealphus does his best to hug them back smiling softly

“Ah you caught me off guard” Andrealphus said

“Yes you are indeed in Niflheim” Bathin says

And after that the card goes as the same story y’all I still don’t have that card and do I want to farm? Not really but do I have to? I’m hella curious about the card story… maybe I don’t know also I had to reinstall that whole game

[autisticlancemcclain]

fic rec friday 34

welcome to the thirty-fourth fic rec friday! where, on friday, i rec five of my favourite fics. 

1. Red Poppies by @icypantherwrites

Hanahaki (with a twist) AU — Lance has never experienced a case of Hanahaki this bad. He wishes he could say it’s just the amount of flowers he’s coughing up and desperately trying to hide from the team, just as he’s trying to hide the fact that he technically died at Omega Shield from them, but it’s not just that. It’s the fact he keeps choking out red poppies. And red poppies...

They symbolize death.

the most interesting take on hanahaki ive ever seen tbh. i know icy panther is known for her edgier storytelling, but this is one of my faves of hers! i like the originality of it, and of course i adore the addressing of the omega shield disaster

2. Voltron: Last Dialogue by @uncouth-peasant [IMPLIED CHARACTER DEATH]

After the events of Omega Shield, the Astral Plane has a visitor.

okay look i know everyone freaks about major character death but im asking u to read this anyway. for one its only IMPLIED, technically lance could still be alive, and also it’s just a really well-written fic. lance and shiro have so so so much potential with how similar their characters and arcs are, so i loved how this one explored that in its heartbreak

3. The Poison of Deceit by @icypantherwrites

This diplomatic mission is not going the way Lance had hoped. The diplomacy part on behalf of Voltron is going fantastic and Lance doesn’t think he’d be remiss in saying he had a large hand in that. But the whole impress Shiro bit is an epic fail as Shiro doesn’t seem to notice his efforts at all and it’s only worse with Keith showing him up at nearly every turn. The aliens they’re working on the alliance though have noticed his efforts. But as Lance stands here now, Shiro and Keith’s lives along with a vial of poison in his hands, he isn’t so certain that was a good thing.

the fuckin ‘i drank poison to save your life’ trope will NEVER get old idc idc. the heart dropping moment when the team realises that by doubting lance they may have cost him his life...insanity fr. like i eat this shit up every time

4. blind spots by @adelfie

Lance knows something’s wrong.

Keith turns his gaze on him, dark eyes latching onto him like an anchor.

Normally this is when Lance can think of something stupid to say to make Keith smile. Bonus points if he can get a laugh. Usually it isn’t hard — smiles come easy when it’s them. But something is wrong, and Lance knows that Keith’s smile will be the farthest thing from him if he says it.

-- Lance gets hurt during a mission with Keith and the Blades.

blade pining down bad keith in startled awe of bamf lance...it eats every single time like lets be honest my friends. bamf lance in every flavour is delectable but through keith’s view????? oh god it’s something special

5. Isn’t There A White Knight by @bosstoaster-writing

Kink Meme FIll: "In the first episode, Lance says that Shiro is his hero. But Shiro is still just a guy in his mid twenties, and we've seen him join in on silly stuff ("Blam blam blam!").

So what I want is five times Lance sees Shiro do dorky, ridiculous things, and one time he realizes he'd still follow this dork to Hell and back."

C'mon, as if I could pass that up.

five plus one? check. lance learning to know his idol as a human? check. gentle and careful and clumsy relationships? check. and dorky loser goober shiro, my love and light? CHECK CHECK CHECK. this fic is so so fun. shiro should get the right to be a dorky goober at all times and anyone who writes that is my hero

that’s it for today!! i’ll see y’all back next friday for the next fic rec post!!!

[chlorinecake]

your first impression of your moots and your impression now?

took me a while to get to this but here’s my long asf answer 🐈‍⬛

@angel1kisses ✮⋆˙ idk, something abt her blog jst INSTANTLY captivated me, like… even before I saw what she looked like, I knew she’d be a baddie 😏 in simple word tho, jst think of every high school stereotype (minus jock) but in one person. that’s how chaotic her energy was to me 😭 and it’s the same way now… gotta love my random and smexy wifey huhu 🤭

@nikisdubblchococake ✮⋆˙ meme material. she had an asian santa pfp when I first saw her account 😭 so I figured she would have an interesting sense of humor. she also used a lot of slang and meme references whenever we texted, but I just loved her energy from the beginning, and I knew we’d end up being really close friends like we are now 🫶 my copium 💯

@minhosimthings ✮⋆˙ okay so… mona left an interesting first impression on me… I was honestly a bit intimidated by her in the beginning 😳?? I just didn’t feel worthy/brave enough to talk to her at first 😭 like… she had a very quirky, mysterious, and boss bitch vibe all around ~~ but when I finally got to know her, she’s literally such a sweetheart :( like Ik we’re partners in crime but she seriously stole my heart… ❤️‍🩹 my jagi… all mine 🫂

@starrywonie ✮⋆˙ y’all. I’m abt to embarrass the hell out of myself when I saw this, but I was literally OBSESSED with Nana when I first found her page (way before I started writing myself) ~ like, i honestly thought she was older than me bc I just looked up to her as THE Jungwon fan page. now after getting to know her tho, she’s literally a walking wonie 🥲 the cutest bby ever 🫶

@candewlsy ✮⋆˙ okay soooooooo, i didn’t really have a first impression of Mizu bc as soon as I discovered her blog, we were talking and texting on discord the next day 🤪 !! but from that, i can say she has a very lovable and sociable nature… always willing to learn more abt a person while also sharing things abt herself... can't forget how much she loves her cowboys, too 🤠

@wonfilez ✮⋆˙ i discovered her blog during my yandere phase and boy when I tell you she had me hooked with "beautiful monster" 🫠 I just admired how talented of a writer she was (even though that was the only work I'd read by her at the time, it was enough to make me a fan 😭)... aside from the past though, once I finally got to meet her, I admired her bubbly personality 🫶

@enmayz ✮⋆ ˙ I just never felt confident/worthy enough to speak to or even follow Mira 😭 ... just from seeing the way she'd talk about her moots on her blog, I could immediately tell she had such a beautiful soul, and anyone close to her was literally so lucky, like- now tho? don't even get me started on her voice... her looks... her charisma ??? the girl just slays, I tell you...

@jaylaxies ✮⋆˙ enhabler's disney princess right here ☝️. I don't know what it is abt Aria, but she just radiates such royal energy??? like, as crazy as it sounds, I'm pretty sure she sparkles like diamonds or smth, bc she's literally a celebrity. an ICON, I tell you. but aside from my fangirling, she really is a sweetheart. very humble, very chill... yeah, she just slays like that 😌

@hoondrop ✮⋆˙ intimidating part 2. I always felt like a peasant whenever I saw Moon’s blog, like- it seemed disrespectful for me to even scroll through her posts 🤡 idk if it was just the aesthetic of her page, but she genuinely seemed ethereal to me. and even now after speaking with her a few times, she’s like an older sister 🥲 cool, chill, while still being relatable, just in a mature sense 🫠

@takiberry ✮⋆˙ miss renè... from the day she followed me, I didn't even bother checking out her blog because I HAD ALREADY BEEN STALKING NGL 🤡 she just seemed so vibey from the way she responded to her fans, plus, not a lot of creators on here write abt &team, so I was like, yes, let's be friends !! now tho, I see her as the lucky friend... blessed with good looks, a sweet personality and the opportunity to talk to ej 🥲 she's just THAT girl ~~

@rowretro ✮⋆˙ even though we just became moots closer towards the end of this year, I had to include Rowan on this list because she's just so cool and bubbly, and I've already had sm fun getting to know this cutie patootie over the past few days and I can’t wait for our friendship to blossom as time goes on :)

@squoxle ✮⋆˙ this beeyatch just gets on my nerves, honestly... from the moment I saw her as a baby in the hospital, I knew she would be the death of my 9 month streak of peace. but to look on the bright side... actually? there is no bright side 😔 only darkness... my impression of her remains the same, tho. she stinks, she's ugly, and HELLA annoying XD

@microwvdstrawb3rri3s ✮⋆˙ when I first saw her account, I didn't really form an opinion abt her bc I saw her as a follower than anything. but once we started talking more frequently, I swear she's like the cutest little sister ever 🥲 so endearing, energetic, and sweet... like, it genuinely makes my day every time I see one of her silly asks or just a random "hello" message in my dms !!

@cheruluv ✮⋆˙ if I'm remembering correctly, I first met Iya when she asked abt one of my yandere fics, so I just assumed right out the gate that she'd have more of an edgy personality, but when I actually got to know her, she's such a ray of comfort ❤️‍🩹. I mean, she's literally a human version of a my little pony character. just so nice and friendly all the time... 🫠

Side Note: This year has been TRASH to say the least (won’t get into the details because the haters are waiting to celebrate my misfortune)… But ever since I started this blog in early August, I’ve never felt happier, like…. ever 🤑!!! So I just wanna thank all of my precious mooties for literally just existing (?) and getting me through some of the toughest moments in my life this year… obviously I’m religious, so I gotta give credit to the LORD too 🧎‍♀️ but knowing you guys is such a slay for me. Legit feels like I’m winning at life… but anyway, Happy New Year to all of you lovelies 🫶🫶🫶 and special thanks to @ashgonedash (the original gangster... kudos to this queen for requesting blood on ice 🫡), and @yourmomscuntis2tighy (my highness... MEGA props for coming up with the convenient chances plot, like HELLO???)... these two girls have supported my goofy ahh blog since the beginning, and I will always remember y’all baddies for that :3 Take care and stay safe !! MUAH 😽 Love, Chloé 🩵

[darnell-la]

heyy.. hey, how y’all doing 😭🫶🏽

i absolutely love this blog, you are so talented and the work you put out BOMB !! logan’s personality/dialogue is amazing. i was wondering if you could do a part 2, or maybe a whole new blurb about logan + anal with reader? thank you so much <33

thank you so much for your kind words and support. we’ve been busy with all of these Logan x reader stories, but we’re completely fine with it. We love this man. The character AND the actor.

this is a whole different story from the last but still involves anal with the reader. he’s very mean in here but has a reason to be. I think you guys would like this…

follow our Instagram @ darnell.la so we can start posting random videos, photos, edits, and memes of the people we write about!

———

Tonight was a fun night. At first, Logan showed her off by dancing with her, filling her drinks and maybe giving her a few pecks here and there. It felt special since this was the first time he’s shown real affection towards her in public.

Everyone kind of had an idea months ago after he yelled at y/n, telling her it was too dangerous to fight without being by his side. Every mission from them, he’s literally glued on her, not letting her out of his sight for even a second.

After a couple of hours, the mutants were drunk and Logan was gone. He’s been gone for only ten minutes, but y/n noticed. She always does.

Y/n got up to talk around and find him, maybe even get another drink while she’s at it.

“So you like them badass now? Uncontrollable and dumb!?” Y/n heard Jean yell in the kitchen. “I’ve never not liked them badass, Jean,” Logan spoke. The jealousy of him talking to Jean about anything flooded her body.

“You didn’t like me when I was badass or uncontrollable. What is it about her that I don’t have, hm? Does she kiss better? Fuck? Suck? Tell me, Logan, because we both know I can do it better,” Y/n wanted to say something, but she wanted to hear what Logan had to say.

The man chuckled, knowing Jean was nowhere near how y/n was. Her personality was better, she treated him better, and she wasn’t scared to show how much she adored him. Jean never showed anything towards him unless they ran into each other in an empty hall or room.

“You wish,” he went to walk away but Jean grabbed his face and pulled him to a rough kiss. Y/n’s eyes widened as her fists balled up, but she stood still. Why? Because Logan didn’t do anything.

Y/n felt her eyes tear up, her breathing get heavy, and her head spin. She couldn’t stay watched. She left right before he finally did something.

The man grew his claws out and raised them to Jean's neck after pushing her away. “You touch me again, and I’ll bring 'em out with my fists on your neck,” Jean was angry but stayed silent. He truly has moved on, or maybe he’s never wanted her like that in the first place.

For the rest of the party, Logan searched for y/n. He walked through the whole mansion after he didn’t find her on the couch she left.

He hated not being around her. It’s not like anything would happen, but he needed her presence.

“Ssh, not too loud,” Logan heard his girl's voice coming from one of the bathrooms. The man sighed in relief, glad he finally found her until he heard a man's voice. That man was Scott.

“Why? No one’s around here, and even if they were, who cares?” The man couldn’t stop kissing all over the girl. She was so sweet and he’d been wanting to get at her before Logan claimed her.

Logan couldn’t believe what he was hearing, so he kept quiet and placed his ear on the door.

“You taste so good — I bet you’re soaked,” the man spoke as his hands traced under her dress. “How about you find out,” she giggled right before his fingers rubbed through her slick.

“Fuck,” he groaned, and that was it. Logan had enough. “The fuck is going on here!?” Logan kicked the door down. Literally. The door had broken off of the hinges, making y/n and Scott jump. His fingers instantly pulled out of her.

“Dude, what the fuck is your problem!?” Scott shouted at the man as he covered y/n up. The girl's right tit was out, her dress was pulled up and her makeup was smudged slightly. How long have they been at this, Logan thought to himself.

Logan couldn’t help but laugh at the two. He could feel his head hurt from the anger running through his body at the sight of Scott of all people, on his girl. His fingers were in his girl.

“Ima give you 5 seconds, Scott, and if you’re not off of my girl and out of my face — I’m gonna slice your ass in half,” Logan threatened and after first, Scott wasn’t scared. He wasn’t going to do shit.

“Look, she told me what you did, so why do you care if I have her now?” Scott spoke. “Five,” Logan said. “Dudes, c’mon,” Scot spoke again. “Four,” Logan said, fists balling and eyes staring through Scott’s soul.

“Logan, get out of here. I’m busy with-“ y/n was cut off after Logan’s claws came out. They seemed longer than ever. “Three,” he spoke. Now Scott was terrified. He was actually going going to do it.

“Come to me later,” Scott said as he fixed his pants and went to walk past Logan. Logan grabbed Scot by the shirt, making the scared me shout in fear, and y/n jump.

“There ain’t no later,” Logan said before throwing Scott off of him. He watched the man speed away and back to the party, ignoring how he could’ve been mauled by Logan.

“L-Logan, you can’t just-“ Logan’s hand was around her neck, cutting her off from whatever dumb shit she wanted to say. “How much did he touch you?” Logan asked. “W-What-“ Logan shook the girl by her neck in anger as he shouted, “How much did he touch you!?”

Y/n didn’t answer. She was shocked at the way he reacted. She wasn’t scared, but she knew he was pissed off. Why when he cheated?

“Answer me!” He demanded as he gripped tight. His right hand still had his claws out, trying to intimidate her, but she knew he could never hurt her, so she decided to have a little fun.

“A lot,” she replied to the man’s question. It seemed like his eyes instantly grew dark. “Did you suck him off, y/n?” He asked, praying to go she wasn’t that stupid.

He still doesn’t know that she thinks he cheated on her. All he’s thinking is that she’s too drunk to fully understand what she’s doing. Even if she did understand, he wasn’t going to let her go. She was his, and she knew that.

“What if I did?” The girl whispered with a grin he hated seeing on her face. She didn’t get the chance to, but she was thinking about it. “Why would you do that, y/n? Why!?” Logan felt his heart shatter.

“Why would you do what you did, huh!? You think this shit only goes one way!?” Y/n choked but managed to get out what she needed. “What are you on about? Y/n, you’re drunk as fuck,” Logan released her neck.

“So what? I rather be drunk and drown on Scott’s lips than spend another second with you and fake love,” y/n spat, eyes instantly tearing up at the view she saw almost an hour ago. She thought the alcohol she’d consumed since then would stop her emotions, but it failed.

“Don’t fuckin’ say that again, and what fake love are you talking about? Y/n, are you even thinkin’ right now? Is your head fucked up or some shit?” Logan tried to understand what had happened since he left her.

“The only thing that’s fucked up is you!” Y/n’s eyes darkened in anger, but they soon faded away. She was sad to unleash any type of power on him. She felt weak and betrayed.

“Baby,” Logan spoke as he stepped towards her and raised his hand to cup her cheek, but she slapped his hand away, eyes barely being able to stay up and looking at him.

“C’mere,” he softly said, finally cupping her cheek with one hand and using the other to rub her thigh. He did anything to calm her down. She’s never lashed out so bad where her powers showed.

“Talk to me, baby. You can’t just stay quiet and expect me to know what I did to upset you,” she spoke low as he rubbed the tears from her cheek. “But you should know — Y-You did it and-“Y/n cut herself off with a choked cry.

“Tell me what I did, bub — I wanna make it up to you,” he said and even though he had no idea what he did and y/n still believed he cheated, she would’ve definitely taken him back. He’s so good at apologizing in different ways.

“She kissed you — A-And you didn’t pull back,” Y/n said as she turned away. “Baby, what?” He asked, already forgetting about what Jean tried to make him do. He would never leave y/n for a woman who can’t make her mind up.

“Jean,” y/n said low, finally holding her cries in. All of a sudden, she felt angry again. “What? Baby — Wait-“ he said, remembering what went down in the kitchen. He could’ve sworn smelt y/n near but he was too busy trying to get through Jean’s head that he’s been done with her.

“Baby, she kissed me then I pushed her off of me,” Logan said. “No, you didn’t!” Y/n yelled at him before pushing his chest hard, causing him to stumble. She was strong. She always has been.

“Y/n, yes I did!” He said, confused about what she saw. Y/n scoffed as she walked out of the bathroom. “Baby- Y/n!” Logan ran after her as she stormed back towards the party.

“Y/n, stop, don’t you fuckin’ go back to him,” Logan growled, knowing that was where she was going. “Fuck off and let me have fun,” Y/n said, making the man’s blood boil.

Before she knew it, y/n was pinned up against the wall, Logan’s hands on her head and pressing her cheek up against the cold wood.

“You think I’m going to let you walk back to him? Just like that!? No — You’re gonna fuckin’ listen to me,” Logan said through his teeth as y/n tried pushing off of the wall, but every time, he slammed her back.

“I didn’t kiss her, okay? If you were there long enough, you would've seen me threatening to claw her, but I fuckin’ bet your emotional ass left before any of that, huh? Huh!?” The man shouted.

“Because you didn’t pull away-“ y/n tried saying but the man pulled her back and then smaller her against the wall again, not really wanting to hear her speak about what she thought she saw.

“I didn’t pull back right away because she got in my mind. I told her to pull back, or I’ll make her. That was it! Ten fucking seconds, and you left in five,” Logan was heated.

“W-Why would I stay and watch my boyfriend kiss his ex?” Y/n genuinely asked as she felt his body crush her. “You didn’t have to, but maybe next time you don’t go sucking Scott’s tongue and not hear me out — And, she’s not my ex!”

It was silent for a while. All you could hear was Logan’s breathing. His deep, dark, animalistic breathing. He’s never been this furious around her before. He wanted to run after Scott and make sure y/n saw nothing in him after he fucked up his face.

“I-I’m sorry,” y/n said, now understanding that Logan didn’t cheat on her. He threatened Jean for y/n, but she was too emotional to confront them or stay any longer to see what he would do.

“Oh, are you now?” Logan asked in her ear before letting out a laugh. “You always are — You’re always yellin’ at me like I’m some bitch,” Logan’s grip on her head and waist tightened.

“You couldn’t even keep your legs closed for an hour after I cheated. You were just gonna slut around, hm? Hm!?” Logan’s hand that was on her waist, loses and travels down her dress until he pulled them up, now rubbing his crotch against her ass.

“I’m sorry,” it came off as a beg for him to forgive her. “Well, sluts get treated like sluts, don’t they?” Logan asked her like she was going to answer. She didn’t know what to do or what to say to calm him down.

It was too late to calm him down. He’d already reached into his jeans and pulled his cock out. She panicked when she remembered they were in the hallway. Anyone could come out.

“No, Logan- Not out here,” she whispered like they weren’t just yelling at each other. “Sluts get treated like sluts,” Logan said after he spat on his cock, rubbing a huge amount on. He needed to make sure he could fit.

“Baby, baby, just please let’s- let’s think about this, okay? Let me apologize,” she begged, trying to move her hips away, but she was going nowhere. He had her pinned down.

“Sluts get treated like sluts,” the man repeated before she felt his tip push at the hole she’s never used before. Before she could scream at the sudden burn, Logan used the hand pushing her face into the wall, to cover her mouth.

Her body was now pressed back against him, allowing her to hear all of his low and deep groans. It hurt him pushing in, but he was going to make it work.

“L-Logan,” y/n cried, her voice still muffled but it’s not like she would’ve been heard anyways. Her heavy breathing won’t let her get a sentence out.

“That’s it,” Logan pushed until he was fully inside of her to the hilt. “So fuckin’ tight — Gotta be the most perfect girl there is,” Logan spoke as he moved his hips, thrusting to her girl slowly, allowing his spot to coat his entire cock and her hole.

Y/n cried in pain as her back arched. She was fighting for her life to keep her legs still, but they were shaking too much. He’s already big, and now he’s in her ass with lack of preparation.

“Did he do this?” Logan asked, talking about Scott. “Can he fuck you like this, hm? You think his cocks meant for your hole like I am, y/n?” The paste he was fucking her in, only made it harder for her to speak. He hadn’t even taken his hand away from her mouth.

“Oh, I know, baby — I know I’m the only one that can make you look this stupid,” Logan could see her eyes cross. She swore she was actually losing her mind. “My little dumb baby,”

Logan’s free hand dug into y/n’s waist, forcing her weak body into his thrust. He couldn’t get enough of her begs, her cries, her small moans, and the way she shook on him.

“You think he’ll want you after this? After you can’t speak for yourself?” Logan continued his bullying. “Actually, I bet he would. After his nasty ass fingers got a taste of you,” Logan got angry once he remembered.

“Bet he ran off sniffing and smelling how sweet you are. So fuckin’ sweet, but that’s supposed to be for me. Only me!”

“You fucked that up, bub, and ima make sure you regret it,” Logan pulled y/n off of the wall before throwing her to the ground. Not too hard because he still cared for her, but enough for her to know he was pissed.

“L-Logan, I’m sorry-“ she couldn’t speak before he had her on all fours and slammed right back into her ass. The scream she let out was loud, but the music the party had was louder.

“I pray to god that son of a bitch comes back out here to this view. Who would want you after you slut yourself in the middle of school, huh? Who?” He asked, pulling the girl back by her hair.

“That’s what I thought. I’m the only one that wants a pretty little slut like you,” he said in her ear as his free hand traced to her tits before letting them free.

“I’m the only one that can control you and give you what you want. No one else, do you hear me?” The tone in his voice made y/n know he wanted an answer. “Y-Yes,” she sobbed.

“So fuckin’ drunk — God, y/n,” he chuckled. “Gonna let me have my way with you? Gonna let me keep fuckin’ this ass till you pass out?” He asked as her eyes slowly became heavy. He could see her. He knew she was close.

“Cum for me first, baby doll. Wanna hear that shit all over the floor,” his deep voice seemed needy, but y/n didn’t need him to tell her twice before she let loose just like he told her to.

“That’s it, princess — My dirty little girl cummin’ brain dead,” y/n was confused but too fucked out to fully realize Logan was fucking her in the air. Her knees were on the ground her feet grazed against her floor.

“Gonna cum, baby,” Logan’s arms held her up as her asshole squeezed so hard it hurt, but he dealt with it. Apart of it made him closer.

Before he knew it, he was filling the hallway with his deep groans and the loud sounds of their skin clapping. “F-Fuuuck, baby,” he could hear his spit and cum mix around in her ass.

Logan was out of breath, but his thrust never stopped. They got harder, feeling like hard hand slaps on y/n’s ass cheeks.

“You thought it was over, baby?” Logan laughed deeply as y/n’s eyes slipped away. He knew he punished her well, but he wasn’t going to stop until Scott came back out to her to “come to her later”.

[serial-serializednovelreader]

Nova’s Notes - Dracula Daily - June 25

Where Jonathan springs into action!

“No man knows till he has suffered from the night how sweet and how dear to his heart and eye the morning can be. When the sun grew so high this morning that it struck the top of the great gateway opposite my window, the high spot which it touched seemed to me as if the dove from the ark had lighted there. My fear fell from me as if it had been a vaporous garment which dissolved in the warmth.”

His poetic side is just…*chef’s kiss*. It’s interesting also how he uses religious imagery here with the dove from Noah’s ark in the Bible. I want to dive a bit deeper into this because I think it holds meaning.

For those who may not know, the story goes that God flooded the earth and Noah and his family (plus two of every animal) were the sole survivors because he built an ark as he was instructed to. Well, after many *many* days of this flood, Noah sent a dove from the ark out. If it came back empty-beaked, they would know the flood was still on, but if it came back with something (which it did — an olive leaf), they would know the flood was ended and it would soon be time for them to be on dry land once again.

I think Jonathan comparing the sun to this dove in particular tells me that he sees it as a messenger, both of peace to him (because doves are often used as symbols of peace and his fear falls away) and that he needs to stop being passive. If he imagines that this time as a prisoner has been spent like he’s in the ark during the flood, that time has now come to an end: now it is time for him to step out onto the “land” which is almost quite literal here. He confirms this by saying:

“I must take action of some sort whilst the courage of the day is upon me. Last night one of my post-dated letters went to post, the first of that fatal series which is to blot out the very traces of my existence from the earth.”

“Let me not think of it. Action!”

He knows his time is limited and — wisely — treats it as such. As many have pointed out, Dracula has made a mistake by giving Jonathan a time limit. As he himself has said, he knows the span of his life and that is one heck of a motivator. Not to mention, he just experienced two horrific events last night (even if he didn’t see them exactly, he knows they happened and that’s enough) and it is justifiable cause to get him moving. Some people would sink into despair and wait for death to approach them, but for Jonathan, it has the opposite effect.

He figures that the Count must need some time to rest and if it’s not at night (which is always the time he’s harassed), it must be daytime, right? And the best way to find him would be to infiltrate his room — if only it weren’t locked.

But then Jonathan gets an idea. An awful idea. A wonderful, *awful* idea!

Sorry, y’all! Had to make the Grinch reference. Anyway, yes, Jonathan decides that if Dracula can crawl up walls in a lizardly fashion, so can he. Desperate times call for desperate measures. If he doesn’t make it back well…

“Good-bye, Mina, if I fail; good-bye, my faithful friend and second father; good-bye, all, and last of all Mina!”

First of all, this is so sad and so sweet that he says bye to Mina first and last (again, that first and last thing to show you care is becoming a running theme here) and calling Mr. Hawkins a second father is also very sweet.

Secondly, if you also thought of the “you said bye Squidward twice” meme like I did when you saw this (I promise I’m trying to be serious), there’s fanart for that! Check out this lovely art by @count-skribula!!

“I went whilst my courage was fresh straight to the window on the south side, and at once got outside on the narrow ledge of stone which runs around the building on this side.��

So it’s interesting that he chooses to not go from the window on his room, but instead to go from the South window. One reason may be that, as he says in the next sentence, the stones are bigger here and can probably hold him better, but I don’t think that’s the only reason.

I went back to the first Lizard Fashion entry to figure out a bit more about why that may be. Here’s what I found:

“The window at which I stood was tall and deep, stone-mullioned, and though weatherworn, was still complete; but it was evidently many a day since the case had been there.”

So this is referencing the South window and it sounds like this window is much easier to fit a human being through than, say, the one in his room. Going back to this entry was also useful because it references where the Count’s room is in relation to this window:

“As I leaned from the window my eye was caught by something moving a storey below me, and somewhat to my left, where I imagined, from the order of the rooms, that the windows of the Count's own room would look out.”

So while this window is more ideal for his ease of movement, it will be more difficult for Jonathan to reach the room itself.

“I took off my boots, and ventured out on the desperate way. I looked down once, so as to make sure that a sudden glimpse of the awful depth would not overcome me, but after that kept my eyes away from it. I knew pretty well the direction and distance of the Count's window, and made for it as well as I could, having regard to the opportunities available.”

He even gets the Lizard Fashion down to taking off his BOOTS and going barefoot. Also, have I mentioned I love Jonathan and his smartness today? Because I do!!! Him looking down once so it doesn’t catch him off guard later is so….UGH. I don’t go into fangirl mode often, but for him? Always. What a guy, so smart. I don’t know why that detail gets me but it does!! Love that man.

ANYWAY, you can tell he’s been watching the Count very often — probably every night — if he knows exactly where the window is. So another cool detail right there.

I love how he describes himself as excited initially until he reaches the window, at which point he feels agitated, whether it’s from trying to open the windowsill or just from his proximity to the Count.

After diving (feet-first) into the window, he discovers that there’s no Count! The room, in fact, is practically empty. He is able to make some astute observations about it, however:

1) It looks like most of the other South rooms he’s seen.

2) It’s dusty — obviously in disuse.

3) the Gold CornerTM — filled with gold from different countries (that he’s able to name!). It’s also dusty as if it’s been in the ground, but less than three centuries old. The jewels and chains that lay there are old and stained. It’s interesting that he takes the time to note this. It must’ve taken a while to go through the coins and note their age and where they’re from!

While he can’t open the outer door and there’s no key to speak of, he does notice a heavier door that’s open. It leads to a big spiral stairway…this is usually the part where I’d say “turn around and go back!!!” But Jonathan has proven himself quite capable for a horror protagonist thus far and he’s already taken so much effort to get to this point, why not?

At the bottom of the tunnel, he finds a door which leads to an old and broken chapel which smells of “old earth newly turned” — a horrible smell, apparently. Inside, he finds the ground has indeed been dug up, with the dirt now in boxes, the same boxes the same he saw from the Slovaks’ wagon. There are also three vaults to go into. Ever the sleuth, he carefully combs over every inch of the chapel. Going into two of the vaults yields nothing but the heebie-jeebies (with coffins and more dirt), but the third…

“There, in one of the great boxes, of which there were fifty in all, on a pile of newly dug earth, lay the Count! He was either dead or asleep, I could not say which—for the eyes were open and stony, but without the glassiness of death—and the cheeks had the warmth of life through all their pallor; the lips were as red as ever.”

Yep, Dracula jumpscare! He’s in a dirt bed (has anyone made a teenage dirtbag edit for him yet? Can we make that a thing?) and sleeps with his eyes open. *shudders*

It’s interesting that Jonathan notes while he seems dead — he even searches him for signs of life by bending over to look at his breathing — he notes that he can’t have been dead long and seems to retain some signs of life. And, most disturbingly, when he goes to search him for keys (one of his original missions here) his eyes have taken on an expression of hate. Either he has RBF (literally) or he’s not as lifeless/asleep as first thought.

“I fled from the place, and leaving the Count's room by the window, crawled again up the castle wall. Regaining my room, I threw myself panting upon the bed and tried to think....”

Now, I know you may be thinking “Jonathan, WHAT??? You went all that way just to do nothing and run back??” And yeah, I get it. But he actually did find out some good information here, both about this castle and himself:

Where Dracula sleeps

Dracula *does* rest during the day (although how is uncertain)

Dracula has currency from around the world (less than 300 years old and likely kept buried — why?)

What the Slovaks are doing

There are hidden passages in this castle (possibly more?)

Jonathan can go into Lizard Fashion ModeTM and even in a rush, too!

Keys may be a lost cause here (try something else to escape)

I would consider this productive, because above all, some of the scariest part of this whole experience for him has been his inability to gain information. Hearing the Slovaks do their work, seeing Dracula come and go, being simply locked in his room has been grueling on him. At least being able to gain some kind of information is extremely valuable and the fact that he’s setting his mind straight to thinking tells me this was not an idle trip.

Also, as a fun note: another user (here’s the post) pointed out there are airholes in the cover of Dracula’s dirt box and…yes there are LOL. Like he’s a little bug 😂😂😂 I have no special reason to point this out, I just really like that this is a thing.

Keep going, Jonathan — you got this!!

[anopenbookunderlockandkey]

For @professionalprocrastinator22 @gravelyhalversobbing

I give you…

The 118 Ramen Chat

Eddie: uhhh how do I make ramen, do I just pour some water on it and stick it in the microwave or oven?

Buck: oven

Bobby: how about just boiling water?

Eddie: how

Teapot?

Hen: a kettle

Buck: you just put water in a pot > boil > put the noodles > put the packet stuff whenever you feel like it

Bobby: or that

Also put an egg

For extra yummy

Eddie: thanks

Do I just break the egg in the pot

Buck: yeah

Crack the egg and throw it at the ramen

Eddie: anyways

I finished

*sends photo of ramen cube in a bowl with some water*

🤤

Chim: why don’t I see water there

Eddie: tf you mean it’s right there 💀

Chim: oh just lighting

Ravi: sure hope you have something to give it flavor 😛

Eddie: uhhh salt 😛

Bobby: doesn’t it have a bag?

Ravi: you’re telling me you’ll just eat the ramen just like that? No vegetables, no broth, just water, salt and ramen?

Eddie: tf

You want me to put the bag into the water?

Bobby: …

Eddie: it’s gonna melt

Hen: what

Unpack it

Eddie: it’s a plastic bag tf

In boiling water

Ravi: open the plastic bag

Hen: the flavor

Eddie: salt 🤔❓❓❓

Ravi: WHERE IS THE FLAVOR PACK GUMMYYYYYYYYYY

Buck: ok

Inside the packaging

Were there more packages

?

Eddie: oh

Yeah

Thought it was one of those anti moisture packages

So it was flavoring 😏

Good to know for next time

Bobby: 🫥

Hen: I mean

There are instructions on the packet

100%

Just read

Eddie: shit

Maybe I shouldn’t have thrown it away 🤦🏽

Hen: well it’s still in the trash bin…?

Eddie: too late now, I ate it already 😵‍💫

Hen: the fuck did you eat?

Noodles on salted water?

Eddie: they were kinda crunchy

Buck: crunchy??????

Hen: CRUNCHY

Bobby: crunchy 🫣

Hen: LMAO

AHSAHAHAHAHA

Bobby: HEAHIUSDAS

SHSJFOROABDJXJD

Buck: did you even cook

BRUH

Ravi: 😖😤🤬

Eddie: man my stomach hurt now 🥴

Bobby: I’M OUT

*Bobby has left this conversation*

Hen: you just ate

raw noodles

And salted water

Eddie: but y’all said to put salt in for flavor 😝

Hen: I can’t

I’m laughing too much

Hahahahahaha

Buck: instant noodles has too much salt already 😨

Eddie: tf y’all said not to eat it without flavor 😰

Buck: the packaged bag

Is the flavor

????????????

Eddie: oh 🤦🏽

Ravi: Eddie, please learn to read your cooking stuff, don’t try to wing it

*Buck added Bobby to the chat*

Chim: Eddie’s cooking skills

*sends Bob the builder meme: can we fix it, no it’s fucked*

Bobby: I didn’t know you could mess up instant noodles 🫠

Buck: I mean

It’s his first time

Could be worse

Chim: you could collab with Firefox on a cooking stream

Ravi: 1. boil water

2. Pour water in bowl

3. Put ramen in

4. Put powder/oil (whichever it is) for seasoning

5. Let it soak 3-5 minutes

6. VOILA

Eddie: ok explain this

If it’s called instant noodles why did it take me 45 minutes to make

Scammed

🙃

Bobby: wait what

45 minutes?

Buck: my man took 45 minutes to cook a non-flavored half-cooked instant noodles

Eddie: 🫡

Inspiration: https://www.tumblr.com/self-loving-vampire/665151715846356992/they-really-should-teach-people-how-to-cook-in