#ya know a lot of the time i fucking hate being trans

[noise-misato-boy-destroyer]

Well that's gonna hurt for like.....ever :/

[angelspenance]

Shoutout to queer masculinity. Butches, transmascs, amab people who enjoy the masculine parts of themselves, gnc people, etc etc. No if ands or buts.

[gayvampyr]

im sorry but this shit pisses me off. i don’t care if it’s a joke. where’s the punchline. even in 2022 gays still do not have equal rep in shows. the fact that only in the last couple years have we gotten actually semi-decent queer rep shows how much queer media is still needed. a lot of people still don’t even know what the word “bisexual” means, much less terms like “asexual” or “aromantic” or “nonbinary”. whether you’d like to admit it or not, it matters that a show actually has a bi character and explicitly says the word bisexual— a popular show at that. ik some of you guys have forgotten that the rest of the world isnt as acquainted with queerness as your online lgbt friend group, but a show on a major streaming platform saying “bisexual people exist” is important. it needs to be said, and it needs to keep being said until people stop forgetting and erasing bi people.

and yeah, the line “masculine guys can be gay” might seem like a stupid obvious thing, but a lot of people don’t consider masc guys to be gay at all, just like they don’t expect lesbians to be fem. i’ve been told several times that i don’t “look gay” and that i must be confused because i should like “boy stuff” and dress masculine if i really liked girls. people need to be reminded that anyone can be gay, as ridiculous as it sounds. we need to be seen as more than a stereotype and im sick of you “edgy” gays shitting on every piece of queer media like it’s twilight.

the show that these tags are in response to isn’t even adult media. honestly it’s hardly even YA. this show is for kids and teens who are discovering who they are. growing up, i never had ANY sort of representation. i didn’t grow up thinking it was okay to like girls, or that i could be interested in people other than boys, or that i even had the option to not like boys at all. queer representation is not only important, but it’s crucial. straight people get to see themselves everywhere, and never as comedic relief or the butt of a joke. queer kids grow up thinking that what they are is humiliating, that they should be ashamed of being those people who get laughed and made fun of on tv (and irl). in 99% of media, gay and trans people have been a laughing stock. the most representation a queer could get a decade ago was a white cis fem (but not TOO fem) gay man who was only a side character, was never shown with a partner, and served primarily as a clown, like queerness is a circus and cishets are the audience.

so i don’t CARE if young queer media is cringe. i don’t CARE if you don’t like it or if you think it’s forced or stupid or pointless or even if it’s just for a corporation to profit off our existence. the point isn’t why it was made or how bad you think the writing is, the point is that it exists and that there are now young queer people who can finally see themselves, not as a joke but as real people, on screen and go, “that. that’s what i am.” and im elated for this younger generation to be able to say that when i couldn’t. so i don’t care if you’d rather just be called a faggot again like in the good ol days when we were dropping like flies and everyone hated us. if cringey tv shows and bad writing is the price for queer kids to understand themselves better and for cishet people to get a better understanding of queer people, then it’s a small price to pay. shut the fuck up and let queer media exist

[wifelinkmtg]

Yeah alright let’s talk Tarkir

Getting this out of the way: I do not care about Alesha, so if you were coming here ready to hear anything about the first-ever transgender girl out of Magic*, sorry to disappoint.

Actually, yeah, I’m gonna talk about this for a little bit. I understand Alesha means a lot to some people, and I’m not saying they’re wrong to feel that way. I’m sure there are people who had to fight to make Alesha openly & canonically trans, and I’m not saying that this was meaningless, wasted effort. It’s nice to be able to point to someone and say, see, there’s a place for people like me here. I was excited about it at the time and I wasn’t even into Magic back then.

But like c’mon, y’all, she’s not really a character, right? She gets one story, the thrust of which is, “this character is trans, and that’s basically fine.” Alesha exists to be part of the banner image of the internal WotC LGBT employees’ monthly newsletter. She exists to be the discord avatar for every third trans girl into Magic. She exists so a massive corporation can point to her as evidence that they care in some nebulous way about trans people, and she costs slightly less than paying someone to, say, actually moderate the hate speech comments on their vids of Autumn Burchett’s pro tour games.

All of which is to say, they don’t actually care. You know this. Individual staff, writers, artists - sure, but they’re not the ones who make the final decisions. And you and I deserve better from our stories, and we’re never going to get that from fucking Hasbro, right?

So here’s my pitch: seek out actual queer stories, and I’m not talking about contemporary YA shit with a marketing budget. For readers of this specific blog I’d recommend looking up “Attack Helicopter” by Isabel Fall (you should still be able to find it online). Stories where the texture and structure of thought are queer and trans are revelatory. You don’t need to beg for crumbs from a megacorp’s table.

ANYWAY, COMMA,

welcome to Tarkir! There used to not be dragons here, but now there are. In either timeline, everyone is locked in a brutal, unending struggle of clan-against-clan, so thanks, Sarkhan? Yeah, no, I hear you, it’s definitely different now. Yeah, and better. Yeah, because of the...yeah, because there’s dragons now, right. No, you did great, buddy. You really, uh, made a difference.

JESUS, IS HE CRYING? GET ME OUT OF HERE PLEASE

Monastery Swiftspear (art by Steve Argyle)

I’ve come to think of the current era of MtG art (let’s arbitrarily say from Kaladesh block to the present) as the “Magali Villeneuve era”, and if I’m being totally honest, I kind of hate it. Everything is technically competent, clearly lit, and immaculately detailed. Everyone has amazing cheekbones. It is so, so boring. I’m not at all saying she’s a bad artist! Sometimes, as with Kaldheim, she is very nearly the only person in a set making good art. I’ve featured her work on here many, many times.

What I am saying is that her work always has this, like, objectivity to it that feels detached and even alienating, like we’re looking at these characters through a powerful telescope. There’s no stylization, and dare I say no style.

The reason I bring her up in a set in which I will not be reviewing her work (sorry, Narset fans), is that Steve Argyle makes for an interesting comparison. They are to my untrained eye very similar artists: the sharp linework, the combination of dynamics and detachment. The major difference is that Steve’s art is substantially hornier and substantially male-gazier.

And goddammit, at least that’s something.

I HAVE THIS OPINION BECAUSE I’M A BAD FEMINIST. AND I DESERVE TO BE PUNISHED ABOUT IT

Unyielding Krumar (art by Viktor Titov)

I’m not sure why Viktor made this orc look like a ripped lizard man. None of the other orcs in this block look like this. Maybe he thought “krumar” was a species of lizard folk, when in point of fact a krumar is, checks notes, an orphan of the Mardu raised by the Abzan who killed their parents in a twist of worldbuilding regrettably reminiscent of a strategy used in real-world genocides. Whoops!

Anyway, big arms. Lizard person. Sorry about your family.

WIZARDS STAY CLASSY I GUESS

Ire Shaman (art by Jack Wang)

Yeah, see, extremely not a lizard.

We’re not going to talk about armor practicality because that is very much beside the point, but we were all thinking it, and I want to acknowledge that before moving onto saying nice things about what all the leather bands are doing for her arms, and what this lamellar bustier is doing for her tits.

YEAH I KNOW WHAT LAMELLAR IS. PRETTY HOT, RIGHT

Den Protector (art by Viktor Titov)

I am not immune to mothers, nor women in furs, and I’m especially not immune to women with big two-handed weapons (in either sense, I suppose.) I really like the sense of motion in this picture, and the dynamic thrust of the landscape behind her, and... hm. Is her right-hand grip reversed from what it should be? Dammit, that’s going to bother me.

I LIKE MY WOMEN TO HAVE BETTER GRIP TECHNIQUE IS ALL I’M SAYING

Wandering Champion (art by Willian Murai)

I am trying really, really hard not to date myself by a reference to a shitty 20-year-old flash animation. Anyway! she has flexibility, power, and isn’t afraid of a little viscera now and again. All excellent qualities.

I AM HONESTLY EXERCISING IMMENSE SELF-RESTRAINT HERE

Sultai Flayer (art by Izzy)

Sorry, do you not want a forty-foot androgyne snake person to remove your skin with tender, agonizing slowness? Are you lost?

WHY DON’T YOU MARRY YOUR SKIN IF YOU’RE SO GODDAMN ATTACHED TO IT. PUSSY.

Highspire Mantis (art by Igor Kieryluk)

I did the mantis bit in my Battle for Zendikar post, but I thought I’d actually dig into what the appeal is here: raptorial forelimbs. The inescapable, serrated hold of something that could slice you open as easy as thinking, but hasn’t yet. The smoothness of chitin, hard without being inflexible. The many strange articulations. And then either you make out or it eats your head, and it is not up to you which.

WHEN WILL WIZARDS GIVE US THE MANTIS-FUCKER REPRESENTATION WE DESERVE. ROSEWATER’S SILENCE ON THIS ISSUE IS DEAFENING.

Alright, that’s Tarkir down! Who knows what’s next? Probably a very cranky explanation of what fiction is and why it’s okay to like fictional bad guys (it’s because they’re not real.) At first I thought that was going to be a more interesting topic, but the more I think about it the more it seems like it’s...really not. I can have fun with it, though! Thanks for reading, and I’ll see y’all next time.

---------

*the first-ever transgender girl out of Magic/had to settle on a name/and the top three contenders after weeks of debate/were Alesha/and Shensu/and the Kolaghan Bomber

[seven-oomen]

It's alright, I got all I need | Huskerdust | Trans Husk au snippet

The way Angel’s smile widens brightens his world like a little slice of heaven. Not even Nifty running past them with the decapitated corpses of those roaches in her hands, can dull the glow of that smile.

The minute they step into Angel’s room Fat Nuggets greets them at the door with happy little oinks and squeaks. Angel scoops the little guy into his arms and cuddles him close for a minute before throwing him gently back on the bed. “Love you, little buddy, but I got a bath that’s calling my name.”

“Hey buddy,” He takes a few seconds to scratch the little hell hog behind the ears and under his chin. “He’s just had a rough day, we’ll be right with ya.”

He looks up and Angel’s smiling in the doorway to the bathroom, that soft smile that turns his insides to mush and heats up his cheeks. He’s blushing like a school girl around her first crush. He’s better than that. He knows that. But when it comes to Angel, things feel… different.

“Bath?” He offers.

“Bath.” Angel agrees, grinning as he walks past him. He’s almost sure Angel’s letting his eyes roam over his form, though when he turns to look at him, his eyes meet his own. “Thanks, whiskers.”

He doesn’t answer and just draws the water to the right temperature, picking one of those chemically strawberry scented soaps Angel likes so much. His nose twitches at the sickly sweet scent, his tail flicks out and the feathers brush over the tiled floor with soft rustling. It’s not his thing, but Angel likes it and that’s enough for him. Sides, by the time Angel’s dry the scent will have faded to a degree that he can actually stand it.

“Wanna join me, handsome?” Angel’s fingers trace over the top of his left wing, running from his shoulder to the bend as he leans in.

The sudden change in demeanor ruffles his feathers and raises his hackles instinctively.

“Angel…” He warns. Things were going relatively well. But he also knows that after a day like this, Angel’s instincts to please and seduce are still strongly ingrained in him. He fucking hates it when it’s directed at him. It makes him feel like- like before. He grumbles under his breath and shakes his head as if to shake the thought out of his mind physically.

Angel gets the hint, thankfully, and steps back with his hands raised. “Alright, alright. I hear ya. Can’t fault a guy for trying.”

He meets his gaze for a few seconds. The tips of his ears tickle the top of his wings where they’re flattened against his head. “I’ll wait for you in the other room. Just… call me when you need something.”

He doesn’t wait for the response, though he’s sure he picks up a very soft “sure” before he closes the door behind him. It’s not that he doesn’t- He sighs. He likes Angel, as Anthony. He likes him a lot more than he lets on. The problem is that he absolutely hates the persona that Angel has to put on with everyone else. People don’t do that unless they’ve had bad experiences with being themselves. He knows that all too well. Many people did that around him during his time as an overlord. And back then he reveled in it. Now? He fucking hates it, with every fiber of his being.

[mickmilks]

fic requests you say? where's bongo cat.

anyway i'm throwing my hat in the ring and ask for trans!mickey after too surgery (and ian taking care of him, because mickey is being a little stupid and tries to do everything himself).

not sure that's what you're asking for but it's what came to mind.

(also, can you imagine trans!mickey realising he has an excuse to wear his hawaiian shirts now and also when he realises he can just leave them open now because his chest his flat. i am experiencing emotions.)

this got longer than needed, anyway, love ya, bud, hope YOUR recovery goes well!

nosho!!!! when i say i am in love with this prompt...

this also ended up being a little longer than planned so uh. oops? or you're welcome.

----------

“C’mon, let me-”

“I got it, Ian!” Mickey huffs.

It’s been two weeks since Mickey’s top surgery, and much to Ian’s dismay, is trying to do everything himself. Stubborn-ass, Ian calls him. Currently, Mickey is trying to reach for a coffee mug in their cabinet.

“Mickey, you could tear your incisions. Please, just let me do this one thing for you. I’ll let you make the coffee, but the doc said no reaching for a few weeks. Please.”

Begrudgingly, Mickey relents. 

“Fuckin’- fine. I hate this.” Mickey says with a sigh.

“I know,” Ian says softly, grabbing Mickey’s favorite mug from the shelf and setting it on the counter, “but if you want to heal properly, you’ve gotta listen to the doctor.”

“Feel so… useless and shit. Can’t even get a stupid coffee cup. Feels like I can’t do anything, man. Just wanna be done with this shit.”

“It’s only a few more weeks, you’ll make it, I promise. You’ve made it this far, you did such a big thing, and the payoff will be so fucking worth it.” Ian tells him, reaching to rub Mickey’s back gently. 

“Yeah, guess you’re right. Just tired of bein’ in bed all the time and cooped up like this.”

Mickey leans into Ian’s touch for a moment, then grabs a coffee pod to put in their new Keurig coffee maker. He pops it into the top of the machine and sets the mug underneath the brewer before pressing the brew button. Soon, the comforting scent of coffee fills the air. 

“Can I grab the milk for you, your highness?” Ian asks with a small smirk. 

“Fuck off, man. Fine.” Mickey retorts, a small smile in return to assure Ian he’s not actually mad.

“Hey, don’t forget, you get those annoying bandages off later today. I think you’ll feel a lot better,” Ian tells him, pouring the milk into Mickey’s coffee.

Mickey glances down at his chest, smoothing one hand down it and smiling a bit to himself. 

“Can’t believe I finally did it,” he says in a whisper. “Felt impossible, y’know?”

Ian softens at that. 

“You made it, Mickey. And I am so fucking proud of you. I love you.”

“Love you too, sap,” Mickey says, leaning over to give Ian a peck on the lips.

*******

Mickey can’t believe it. He stands in front of the mirror at the doctor’s office, seeing his unbandaged chest for the first time. The scars are still red and pronounced, but the doctor assures him that over time and with proper scar care, they’ll heal up nicely, and may even fade. A permanent reminder of how far he’s come, and the feeling of freedom is overwhelming. Tears start to form, but he rubs at his eyes to keep them from falling. 

“Holy fuck,” he says on an exhale. “It’s… that’s fuckin’ me.”

The doctor smiles, and gives Mickey and Ian a rundown of scar care, and leaves the room to give the two of them a moment together.

“You did it, Mick. I am so proud of you for doing this.”

“I - fuck.”

Before he can get too overwhelmed, Mickey reaches for his shirt and carefully pulls it on, turning to Ian. He leans into him, wrapping his arms gently around Ian’s waist, burying his face into Ian’s shoulder. Ian hugs him back, rubbing up and down his back.

“C’mon, let’s go. Let’s go get you something to celebrate. I’m thinkin’ milkshakes. What do you say?”

Mickey huffs a laugh, and nods against Ian’s shoulder. 

“Yeah, let’s go.”

*****

Six months later finds Ian and Mickey at the shores of Lake Michigan, the two of them lounging in beach chairs. Ian shirtless, Mickey with an unbuttoned Hawaiian shirt (that he definitely did not steal from the laundry room in their apartment complex). Content smiles on both their faces, hands clasped together between the two chairs. Years ago this seemed unfathomable to Mickey, laying side by side with someone who’s loved him unconditionally throughout everything, who’s been by his side through thick and thin. Let alone, laying (mostly) shirtless on a beach with that same man, watching as the sun reflects on matching silver bands on their fingers. 

“Didja ever think we’d make it here?” Mickey whispers.

“Always.” Ian says with a squeeze to Mickey’s hand.

[emililyqueer]

so... this is just kind of a personal emotional dump. i don't want to bring anyone down, you can ignore this if you just want to do the sexy stuff.

but it is an insight into me, so ya know. here it is. it turned out a lot longer than i wanted... to be honest it's sort of turned into my life story. um. sorry.

i spent so much of my life being ashamed and confused and depressed. i suppose, the thing is... i'm tired of watching other people live the life that i wanted to live.

i was brought up in a very conservative small town, in the middle of fkin nowhere. the place was extremely homogenous. no (visibly) gay or trans people, almost no people of colour. i had a single, disabled mother. my dad was very mentally ill, and he was abusive and violent with it, and even though he left when i was in single digits, he's left some very deep scars on me. i went to school under the time of the Section 28 law - which is to say, LGBT issues were banned in school, and bullying gay and trans kids was absolutely allowed to happen, or else the teachers could be seen as "taking a side" on a "controversial issue". this happened to me multiple times. i hated school. even though i started off in life with a passion of learning, going there broke my enthusiasm for literally decades.

i was queer, and i was in denial. i... sort of understood, i think?? but i realised very young that i couldn't rely on anyone, not my parents, not my teachers, not my peers. i grew up obsessed with the idea of self-reliance and some fucked up idea of personal strength. even after a university friend of mine came out, and i realised i might be trans, i still clung to these ideas, to masculinity and self-isolation. they had kept me "safe" and i felt i needed them. i abused drink and drugs because i felt empty and just wanted to fucking feel something, at least something other than anxiety and despair. it felt like parts of me were missing. most of the time, i felt either nothing, or fear, or stress, unless i was high.

i had health problems, i didn't have any energy or concentration (i later learned that i had ADD), i was depressed, and i had chronic migraines. i went to university to study a BSc in computer science, and i couldn't complete it due to these health problems.

and yeah, the health problems and depression became disabling... because of that i was constantly broke. this country, the tory party especially (but not only the tories), hates disabled people with a passion. i was into political activism at the time and the number of deaths of sick and disabled people coming out of the initial austerity era actually kind of broke my faith in society, i couldn't believe this was being allowed to happen.

as an aside - that was a choice. austerity was a choice, and it came with a body count in the tens of thousands (according to the British Medical Journal) before they just stopped fucking counting. this is a thing that actually happened in one of the richest countries on earth, and it happened as the richest people in that country only got richer and richer, and then we just... forgot, because disabled people don't fucking matter, do we? i'm sorry to get political in the middle of my own miserable ramble but these bastards need to burn in hell for what they did. fuck the tories

anyway.

because i abused my body, and i couldn't afford decent healthcare, or transition related stuff, i actually wrote off my appearance. i decided i would never be able to look good or feel good about myself. there was a brief time when i first got on HRT where i felt great about the future, but once i realised how badly i'd already hurt myself... i just gave up. for a lot of my life i was convinced that i wouldn't be here in the next few months or years, so why build a future?

my desires and sense of identity were just completely buried under a mountain of shame, self loathing, lack of direction, and substance abuse. i lost so, so many years.

so... how are things today? my living situation is crap. it's secure, but miserable. one tiny room, with mold in it which is aggravating my allergies. my financial situation is still bad, but it's not critical - i am struggling to afford some medications, but generally i'm afloat. i am, so far, just about able to maintain a small old car, which i rely on, because i live in the sticks and there's fck all public transport here. mentally, i still struggle, but it's so so much better than it was, and it is getting better. my physical health is... concerning me; i have a lot less energy than i'd like, and i'm in almost always in pain. in terms of drugs, i am mostly clean. i don't really drink, i don't smoke (neither tobacco nor anything else), but i do use prescription painkillers.

one of the bigger things is my gender and sexuality... confusing as hell, i'm in a superposition between trans woman and like... femboy, or sissy feminine man. i don't really understand it, parts of all these things appeal strongly to me on a deep, honest, fundamental level. i'm really not sure how to interpret this.

and, well, when i look at some certain sex workers and models... i feel equal parts inspired, and like i want to cry. i keep seeing people who lived the life i always wanted, and i see how fucking happy and successful they are, and i feel so many things all at once.

but... i am still here. i do still have time left. and i do know a few things about me for sure:

i am a reasonably intelligent person. i'm good with computers, electronics, and cars. i like music, travelling, and um i think i like cooking??? and of course video games. i mean duh, i'm a queer on the internet! :p

i'm determined, i don't want to lie down and die any more, i want things to get better for me, i want a future.

but i think... above all? it's the things i was ashamed of that i love the most. i love kink, i love femininity, i love showing off, i desire outrageous sexual experiences, and looking hot and changing the person i see in the mirror. i want to do porn, to revel in eroticism and queerness, and i want to take these things seriously.

so, that's what i'm going to do. that's why i'm posting this here alongside the fun kinky stuff. it's important, this is me.

[wickedlyqueer]

i've been thinking of starting the wicked novels. have you read all 4 novels? are they worth the read?

I have read all 4 novels, yes. And whether they are worth it or not... heavily depends on what you want to get out of them tbh.

WHAT TO PREPARE FOR:

dense prose that clearly has its roots in post-modernism. If you're not willing to read long sentences that begin with a deep analogy for racism and end with some sort of sexual innuendo or disturbing event, this is going to be a hard read for you.

Just. So much sexual stuff. which ironically enough you can also easily read over. (The second time I picked up on it sooo much more than the first time reading it. but in my asexual defense, how tf should i have known what "dragonsnaked" meant).

Similarly to the bullet point above: you can easily read over incredibly important plot points. This is because Maguire sometimes doesn't bother to elaborate; skips years within a single sentence; and is unforgiving to the mind who wanders while reads. There's a reason my notes look like this:

No consistency in character arcs whatsoever. This isn't your average fanfic or even YA novel. Just to put it into perspective: the book is called "The Life And Times of the Wicked Witch of the West". Which is just "Elphaba's Life". But Elphaba barely focalizes (her point of view), and when she does, it's at a point in the book where she's starting to lose her goddamn mind, so there's always a sense of an "unreliable narrator". So just know going in that the politics of Oz have the center, and especially in the later books all characters start to blend together, with a similar tone of voice and sense of humor.

Maguire—bless him and may god help him—cannot write women. He tries, he really does, but anything about the women anatomy is so unappealingly written and I was not the least bit surprised to learn he's gay lmao. He also has a tendency to turn women (especially when they get older) into "waifs". When in the fourth book he describes Glinda as being sad she never got kids I wanted to scream and rip my fucking hair out. Glinda Upland of the Arduenna Clan would never want to be a mother. She'd fucking hate it. And I'll forever hold it against Maguire for ever having suggested otherwise. (He also did something similar to one of my favorite side characters in the second book; Sister Apothecaire. She gets an absolute character assassination by the fourth book).

The biggest "reveal" in book four was literally spoiled by the family tree in the beginning of the book. 🤦 so there's a built up for like 300 pages and all the while you're like "WE KNOW!! WE ALREADY KNOW!!" which made book 4 a particularly frustrating experience imo.

WHAT TO LOOK FORWARD TO:

Understanding fanfics and other fan work much better. A lot of fanfic is based on a mix of musical and book ("booksical"). Even minor characters like Pfannee, Shenshen, Milla, Crope & Tibbet, will make an appearance, even when a fic is more musical based. This was the reason I decided to read the books too back in the day.

Also understanding (popular) interpretations in fanfics better. Like. I tend to write Elphaba as intersex, non-binary and bisexual. That looks very out of the blue when you only have the musical's context, where Elphaba is played by mostly feminine women. But once you read the book you look at those same headcanons and go "word".

Delicious gelphie (sub)text is there, if you want to look for it. But you do have to look for it (twas written in the 90s, lads).

Very queer, actually! And not just in the sense of like "there's a lesbian couple" like we see nowadays in media, but it's just... present. This is written by a gay man, and it shows. You can see queerness popping up everywhere. There's a lot of sexuality and gender stuff going on. And even though nobody goes "I am a trans man" or whatever, you sometimes read stuff and go "that's gender dysphoria babe, idk what to tell ya"

Once you get used to Maguire's writing style... he actually can write some pretty gorgeous prose and he writes with a lot of wit. I like his sense of sharp (dark) humor.

WORLD BUILDING! I honestly just read the other three books for world building for my own fics, more than anything.

FINAL VERDICT:

I do generally recommend reading at least the first book. Especially the first half of the book is just so solid. There's a reason why "Shiz Era" is so beloved in this fandom. Easily the best chapters out of the entire series. It gives so much more backstory to the musical (and bigger Oz lore). The latter half drags on imo, but that's also kinda the point?

The other three books..... depends. I read them for my world building in my fanfics. And I honestly found the second book to be rather cathartic, because it really goes through the motions of mourning Elphaba and that's what I kinda needed after the devastating ending of the first book, but I've heard other people say book 2 was their least favorite.

Basically. If Maguire hasn't utterly broken your spirit by the first book, the other three books still have plenty of joys in them. (For instance, I fucking love Nor. and whenever Glinda shows up in the sequels, it's always the biggest joy ever!)

Usually I describe the novels as such: "I didn't enjoy reading them, but I sure am glad I've read them."

[the-slasher-madame]

So I’m sneaking my phone out rn because dear lord my dysphoria is so bad. I was wonder if you could do the Sinclair brother, Thomas and RZ Michael helping a ftm s/o dealing with dysphoria? Thank you so much

I am so so sorry :(

I'm genderfluid, but I don't feel a whole lot of dysphoria, but what I have felt was horrible. And most of my friends experience it and it hurts watching them hurt. I'm sorry dear heart, I'll do my best to have a present for you <33333

TW/Notes: gender dysphoria, trans masc/trans man reader, mentions of violence (it's slashers, what do y'all expect?), cursing (but I think y'all are used to that by now lol), probably OOC but again, that's just how I roll here, let me know if I missed anything!!

Bo Sinclair:

Poor thing will take a while to understand

While I am 10000% in the camp that headcannon him as bi or pan, and I think Vinny is some shade of not-cis, Bo is still new here. And a little outdated

HOWEVER, he will defend your honor like a rabid dog. He'll hear someone misgender you and will kill them, brutally, slowly, and will not allow them to be waxified. He gets so pissed at himself when he messes up on your pronouns

Along with all that, I think he would be a little confused and not understand dysphoria. He's like "you said yer a boy, whyoncha feel like it?"

If that's the final straw and you start crying, his entire thought process is 'shit shit shit shitshitshIT'

He hates when you cry and he wants to put himself in the Wax Chair when he makes you cry

I love the idea of this man comforting me while I cry and shushing me

ANYWAYS

Once you explain that your brain is a little bitch as well as the fact that your body just feels wrong sometimes, he understands a bit better; he understands very well what it's like to feel that your body is wrong

He tries so hard to help you on days that it gets unbearable. He makes sure that if you bind, it's safely and whatever you bind with is clean. He steals every piece of masc clothing from the victims (even if it's definitely not the right size). He helps you keep your hair styled how you want (bringing in Vincent to help).

Bo would also help with when you needed to shower but didn't want to look at yourself. A couple of candles and himself, of course, to try to solve the issues

He's also there for all the hardest times, when you just wanted to cry. He always had reassurances ready for you, and never failed to remind you that you were his man

Vincent Sinclair:

I think he understands the most

I am firmly of the belief he goes by he/they, and I won't take criticism

Or is a gender non-conforming man, or non-binary, or demiboy

I think y’all get what I’m saying, he’s a masculine entity but they aren’t a man

He’s the best for helping you feel comfortable

He is the King of soft, god I fucking love them

anyways

He might mess up once or twice, but he’s like really good at getting your pronouns right. Sometimes it feels like they’re more accurate than you

If you don’t want to see feminine clothing? He will actually burn any feminine clothing in the house

While I absolutely agree that they’re co-dependent on Bo, Vincent will not hesitate to lose they’re shit on either brother for misgendering you or being rude. This man would eat straight wax for you ngl

ALWAYS READY TO LISTEN!! If he smells the most tiny bit of sadness or bad feelings, he has a cup of tea (or your favorite drink) prepped and a spot in his lap that hey, wouldn’t ya know, is you sized

They will do anything in his power to learn to make you binders. And he will not let you wear it for too long. Like exactly 8 hours later they materialize at your shoulder and politely ask you to take it off

They could and will spend days showering you in affirmations and validations. You are his man, their handsome boyfriend, and he loves telling you as much

His art of you is always perfect, always shows how you feel, and he tries so hard to show you how he feels and how he sees you in his art. However, they’re also understanding if it’s not helpful when you feel super dysphoric

Another one that’s more than happy to shut off the lights and shower you. They won’t let you lift a finger, pampering your body with all possible bath products in the house

I think they’d both sew you clothing and let you pick out anything you want from the victims. Would also threaten his brothers to buy you things in town

Did I mention they get exceptionally brutal with people who misgender you?? Like I love the idea he get’s very brutal and cruel in his art, but dear sweet jesus on a breadstick anyone who hurts you, physically or emotionally, will be kept alive for weeks and will die horrifically

Loves styling your hair <3, cause he definitely has to cut and shape the hair of finished tourists

Lester Sinclair:

I love this himbo, like I don’t care what anyone says he’s sweeter than sugar

Also like the idea of him having a dark side

Ok moving on to the, you know, request

Y’all remember how in Steven Universe, Blue said “she prefers to be called Steven”? That’s the vibe I get from him. He’s confused, but he’s got the spirit

ofc he makes mistakes, but he tries so so hard and feels so so bad when he messes up

It hurts him seeing you have to feel this way, definitely the boyfriend who cries when you cry

Firmly believes in the healing power of cuddles. Somehow cuddles you extra hard when you feel really dysphoric

I think I might’ve seen this somewhere else, but he when you’re with him and he’s picking up tourists, he will stop the car if someone misgenders you. Full stop, brake petal to the floor, full body turn towards whoever just spoke, and pulls out the Southern Politeness. The politeness that us southerners use when we want to kill someone

“Well, ma’am, if you’d like to keep ridin in my truck you best apologize to the young man who accompanies me.” He’s used to people being bitchy to him, but will not tolerate it directed towards you. I fully believe he has put people out of the truck, driven to Bo, and told him there were some target practice out about a mile or two away. Will refuse to let the twins waxify the rude tourists

Listens to you and tries his best to validate you, even if he doesn’t completely understand. Will do anything to make you feel better

Always always always buys you masculine clothing, even splurging on you (even if you insist he needs some clothes, he’ll just say, “naw, darlin’, I’m jus fine.”

NO HE’D LOVE TO SHARE CLOTHES WITH YOU IF HE COULD!!!!

I’m a slut for close intimacy that isn’t necessarily sexual, so he’d be more than happy to shower with you in the dark or make you the BIGGEST bubble bath possible

NOOO HE’D SIT JONESY DOWN AND EXPLAIN THAT “Y/N’s a boy, alright Jonesy? He’s one of the boys and we gotta treat him as such”

Does worry about when you bind, he’s read up on it and he worries about you getting hurt, but either way he will send you friendly reminders when it’s been 8 hours and very carefully washes what you bind with

Thomas Hewitt:

The Hewitt family is one of the few Christian families that live in Texas I would love to be around (I’m sorry, I have a thing against Texas and I’m suspicious of most Christians concerning my status as a queer person with a uterus in America)

Ok yea, it takes the whole family a little while to get used to everything, but Thomas and Luda are accepting and try to understand. They will also criminally assault Hoyt if he is dick

If Hoyt misgenders you, and if he does it on purpose, he better pray. Thomas will turn on his Extra Scary Mode and Luda will pull out a cast iron skillet she has set aside specifically for dealing with Hoyt

Thomas might make mistakes, but at the same time he doesn’t talk so I think that would affect how often he accidentally uses the wrong pronouns

Also, how much interaction does he have with gender and social norms?? I could see him not understanding why people think it’s a bad thing

Someone is a transphobic wad of dick cheese? Won’t eat that person, straight up won’t. Hell, he might not leave enough to eat

He keeps an eye on you and your binding, but I don’t think he’d be like Vincent and come forth from the shadows to remind you it’s been eight hours (at first at least). But he would try to find patterns to make you binders and makes sure they’re washed properly

He is a master seamster. Sews you clothes that are masculine and that fit and flatter you perfectly. You swear he uses magic when sewing you clothes because how can they possibly be this fitting and help you look so much more masculine??

Will do anything you need to feel better, from cuddles to clothes to tea. Would try to find advice from Luda on how to help you, and she’d tell him what kind of stuff usually helps people feel better, but she doesn’t know exactly what to do either

Would treat you in baths and showers, doing his best to distract you from how you feel with your body

He may not understand completely, but whew boy does he know what it’s like to have body issues. He understands that much, at least, and he aches that you feel similarly to the way he has his whole life

He doesn’t speak often, or like at all, but he’d give you a few words of validation and reassurance that he knows you’re a man, and that he sees you as a masculine individual, and that he loves you no matter what

Feels comfortable enough now to explore his gender

RZ! Michael Myers:

While this man is by no means a child, I don’t think he has a full grasp of gender (at least the way other people think he should)

Like come on y’all, he was locked up as a six year old child and didn’t get the whole experience of ya know,,, being raised (I will forever quote the person who said that Loomis’ degree was written in crayon, cause they were right)

So anyways I don’t think he really understands gender as like the rigid structure so many people think of it as. Like I know for me gender is just kinda weird. Like some sea animal with no shape, or mystery meat that shivers when you poke it

And thus he doesn’t understand transphobia at all. Like bro how does a person telling you their gender affect your life that much??

And along those lines, he may not fully understand dysphoria. His thinking is “you know you are boy, you have told me (the most important person in your life) that you are boy, so therefore you are boy”

THAT BEING SAID MY RZ MIKEY IS SOMFT AND TRYING HIS GODDAMNED BEST ALRIGHT?!!!?!??! He uses his lil 6th sense for gauging emotions to keep an eye on you and is by your side the second he detects a change

Bless his heart he’s a cat. Stares at you, will try bringing you things, and just shows up when you cry. He could be on the other side of the city, but he knows when you cry and will hightail it home

You have to warm him up to cuddles, but once you do his is always always ready

He kind of assumes you know how best to handle binding, but he will still keep an eye out and start to nudge you if you’ve had it on too long

This man doesn’t clean, he’s no help cleaning your binder, BUT he will bring you masculine clothing from a victims house...you just may need to use some lemon juice or hydrogen peroxide on it because I don’t think it was originally that shade of red

I think he’s more a bath person, and would love to try and return the kindness you show him by giving you a bath when you feel dysphoric. Might add too many bubbles, but he figures the more bubbles = the easier to hide under

Back to transphobia: he either kills them especially brutally, or really quickly because they don’t deserve the time of day. It depends on how badly they pissed him off. If someone misgenders you on purpose, you will see their face on the news the same day Mikey comes back with his coveralls soaked and pieces of flesh spattered onto his figure

He’s the kind of guy that you have to show him what to do at first to be helpful and validating, but after that he’s good to go. Give him a break he was never properly socialized as a child :(

Also understands the body issues (very few slashers don’t if I’m being honest) and will try to show you what helps him: making masks. He can be persuaded to extend that to making art

Another one that’s a masculine entity but not entirely a man in the traditional sense. He too thinks gender is a shivering mystery meat ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Alright that’s what I’ve got!!! Again I’m so sorry Ziggy :((( I hope you feel better, and if it helps any you’re definitely one of my slasher tumblr crushes <333333

I will also brutally murder anyone who misgenders you, just hit me up and I’ll grab my bat

[lyraoctaviawrites]

Thanks to Solitaire by Alice Oseman, I’ve started really enjoying writing in both first person and present tense, and I wondered what the ITP characters’ voices would be like if they were the narrator of their own book from this same perspective. Into the Phantasm is third person throughout after all.

So I decided to write a quick opening for each one because why the hell not?

If you write a lot in third person, feel free to do this with some of your own characters, it has been genuinely really fun. A simple change of perspective can do wonders.

Sarah:

Another night’s gone by with very little sleep. My eyes sting and my bones feel cold, but my alarm clock says that Sarah Taylor shall sleep no more. I think that’s a Shakespeare quote. I barely remember anything I learned in English. Why did I even quote that? Stop being weird, Sarah, it’s too early for that!

My alarm clock is way too loud. Feels like my ears are gonna fall off. I should really get a different one… I’d use my phone like a normal person would, but whenever I hear a phone vibrate I start to panic. No clue why. I’m weird. You should know this by now.

I switch my stupid clock off and get dressed into my blue hoodie and leggings. As usual, I check my mirror to see if I look okay, and as usual, I absolutely don’t. I’m passable at best and I don’t look my best today. The bags under my eyes are darker than ever and I just look really pale… It’s annoying… But, I put on my best smile anyway. I’m seeing Maya and Lillian today. A smile is the least I can do to brighten their day.

Maya:

My name is Maya Cadigan. Trans girl, half welsh, full time bitch. I love my friends, hate my mum, hate my life, hate the entire world to be honest. I just hate a lot of things, but that’s not my fault. If those things didn’t want me to hate them, they should stop being so easy to hate.

I realised I was trans a few months ago and to be honest, it’s been rough. Thanks to my mum being a phobic piece of garbage, I knew way less about being trans and queer than I should have. It took a lot of research and a lot of soul searching for me to say, ‘Hey. I’m a girl. I’m trans. And that’s okay.’

I like being a girl.

I wanna tell my friends. I don’t think I’ll be able to go into college if I don’t have them by my side in all this. I met up with them recently and hearing them deadname me made me wanna tear my whole fucking head off. I didn’t want to blame them but I couldn’t help… hating them for it. Of course, that just made me hate myself so I ended up leaving early and now whenever I think about it I cringe. I can be really illogical sometimes.

Sarah will be the easiest to tell. She’s a lesbian so she’s part of the community anyway, she’s literally the sweetest person I’ve ever met in my life and Lillian… I dunno, I guess I care a little more about Lillian’s opinion of me… Sarah first then. Before I have a chance to overthink and ruin it, I grab my phone and start typing.

Lillian:

Welp, here we go. Another day of being alive.

Late summer can be such a boring time, especially so when you’ve barely seen your friends recently and you always have to message first. It’s okay though, they both have busy lives. They both do a lot of stuff… without me… I’m gonna stop thinking about that now!

I contemplate getting dressed but I don’t really feel like going anywhere or even leaving the house. Pyjama day. Why not? Relax a little for once, why don’t ya, Lilly?

Note to self, stop calling yourself Lilly…

I don’t need my friends to have a good time. I can do all the cooking today, maybe bake something (cheesecake sounds heavenly right now, omg), and of course I can marathon some movies. Could watch a bunch of really terrible horror movies. Seems like a really terrible horror movie kinda day.

I’m fine without Sarah and Maya. Plus, when I see them again, it’ll be like they never left. I’ll be fine. It won’t ever be like the nightmares I’ve had about them leaving me. It won’t. It’ll be fine.

I’ll be fine…

Kora:

Day 272 on the run

What an exciting day this is turning out to be. This parallel dimension I’ve been reading about known as ‘Earth’ was real and I’ve just travelled to it! These magic mirrors really are fascinating. I don’t pretend to know how they work but that’s only because I haven’t finished reading the books I have about them.

I love reading so so much but I can tend to be a little slow because if I don’t give the words a little time to digest then what’s the point of even reading the book? I won’t remember any of it!

I’ve tested the mirror out a few times and it seems that moving only a short distance on Earth and warping again can cause me to appear very far away from where I first used the mirror in the Phantasm. However, when coming back to Earth, it sends me back to around the same place. I have no clue why this happens but there’s got to be an answer. My current theory is that the landmasses are a vastly different size but I have yet to prove it.

I seem to have stumbled upon some kind of training centre called a ‘College.’ Perhaps investigating it will give me some information about this amazing new world. For the sake of research, I must enter!

[glareandgrowl]

Everyone Saw it coming if they are on my blog but

Kiyotaka Ishimaru for the ask game plsssss !

Ask game Here

Sexuality Headcanon:

Now, see, starting off with a kinda hard one... Taka's an interesting bean in what I calculate his sexuality to be. Most people assume Gay since... ya know. And while I don't think that's necessarily a bad take, its the popular take. And I am one who tends to shy away from popular takes. (I am also one to vehemently project onto the characters I love). Hence, I HC Taka as Demiromantic! (and demisexual to an extent...)

Forms strong emotional bonds with people close to him? Check. Only ever seems to fall romantically for those he is extremely close with??? DOuble check babeyyy!

Gender Headcanon:

Aaaand now its simple. Taka's a male. Cut and dry. Rather fondly a guy, I must say. He strikes me as the kinda guy who would be so excited to share with you that he uses he/him pronouns! He probably did some soul searching when he first learned of transitioning and other gender orientations only to find he was rather comfortable and happy where he was. (you know he spent hours studying to learn all he could) and would be all for helping others explore their gender too!

I know a lot of people hc him and mondo both as trans, but personally I think hes just very proud of his manliness.

A ship I have with said character:

I couullddd go the easy route and say Ishimondo... But you all already know that. Instead I'm going to go with a more... scandalous... ship.

Its KiyoKiyo. Korekiyo and Kiyotaka. Its my guilty pleasure ship.

Now, granted, I imagine this as a Korekiyo who has shaken himself of his 'sister's' grasp and is "normal" (Ie LOTS of therapy), so its more like the shy introvert getting dragged along by the loud golden retriever boy but I digress. Its sweet to me. Tall lanky and smol but strong.

(And YES this originated from Danganronpa Redemption FIGHT ME---)

A BROTP I have with said character:

Once again I could go with an obvious, that being Chihiro or Hina, but you ALREADY know this and I GO AGAINST THE ORDINARY!!!

I think Sayaka and Taka would be great friends :3

Hardworking, burnout-having besties who have to be told numerous times to slow down and take a break by their chiller, sweet yet partially annoying boyfriends.

A NOTP I have with said character:

There are so many... who do I begin with... Genuinely who do I begin with. Alr I hardly see this one in the wild but Kokichi and Kiyotaka I despise. Either that's just because I hate kokichi but-- BESIDES THE POINT. Hiro and Taka is another one I don't particularly like.

I get where it comes from, the few times they interract in the canon could be seen as brotherly (I GUESS) from Hiro's standpoint but-- Idk it just kinda rubs me the wrong way. Hiro's character in general does that...

A Random Headcanon:

Taka enjoys, and is really good at boxing. (Or wrestling) Like how some stories I've read put him on the football (soccer for us americans) team (or rugby ig idk.) I have a (self-inflicted) HC that Taka has slight anger issues hes still recovering from as a child and ABSOLUTELY uses the environment of controlled violence as a way to work off pent up steam. Any sport could do that really, but the inherent homoeroticism of wrestling is just *mwah* too good to pass up.

I know people like to HC he's into some kind of martial arts lessons for the same kind of vibe, and the art of him and Peko, but I find the inante physicality of using yer fists and body as a much more... *Taka Centric* activity. Idk.

Its the same reason he really enjoys thrill rides like rollercoasters and horror movies (if he can stand to not postulate the entire plot the whole time, ruining climactic moments and making people shush him.)

General Opinions:

HE GOT FUCKING ROBBED IN CANON MY BOY---

anyway feel free to ask me about more characters!!! This was fun :3

[judeesill]

tbf i still find non radfem books like who cooked the last supper, invisible women, the feminine mystique, the second sex etc good recs for girls/women interested in radical feminism. sort of like an intro class to feminism in general before you focus on actual radfem literature. you can't go from 0 feminist readings to gyn/ecology overnight... it's not a given that gyns who find themselves on radblr will have read basic feminist texts

yeah that’s a really good point! I think a lot of the problems on radblr come from the fact that most women come to it without any knowledge about feminism, much less any organizing experience. that’s fine, and to some extent should be expected given the current states of the broader left (weak, disorganized, overrun with liberalism/ anarchism) and the feminist movement (functionally non-existent). That’s just the way it is across the left — I can’t tell you how many so-called socialists I know who couldn’t even tell you what class struggle means. In our case, though, I think it’s especially problematic, because a lot of women are “radicalized” by disillusionment with trans politics (or discomfort with trans people 🙃) — and without a proper grounding in feminist basics, it’s really, really easy to at best lose focus on women’s liberation, and at worst just become a reactionary. lol.

So, I totally agree that some feminism 101 is in order, so we’re all at least speaking the same language when it comes to the messier ideological debates about and within radical feminism.

I think a big part of the problem, though, is that … it’s not a given that women who find themselves on radblr will EVER read basic feminist texts, or even radical feminist ones. it’s pretty obvious from the way people talk about lesbian separatism and political lesbianism that, like, no one knows what they’re fucking talking about. and how could they, if they’re just reblogging quote posts and the same handful of master lists with a whole bunch of random pdfs with no context or commentary? hate to break it to ya, ladies, but all your faves were political lesbians. like, literally all of them. And this is actually pretty clear from the things they write!

I’ll save my takes on radblr’s fundamentally incoherent lesbian politics and the fact that separatism has NEVER been a settled question in radical feminism and the fact that political movements need GOALS and STRATEGIES and DUES BASED MEMBERSHIP ORGANIZATIONS for later. Suffice it to say, we need to stop being so content to let tumblr thought leaders pulling evocative quotes from PDFs decide what we think, and start getting serious about political education.

I don’t think every woman on radblr needs to do a PhD to be able to weigh in on things, but I do think those of us with the time/desire to make intellectual interventions, create syllabi, and/or start cohering some democratic organizational infrastructure (or at least some more discussion groups) can and should step up. Obv people are and have been doing this, but if we want to ever do anything more than snipe at each other online, we gotta get movin.

Thanks for letting me grandstand on ur ask, i just have a decade’s worth of frustration built up about this 🙃 always more to say. (like, I also don’t think we should be so into gyn/ecology at all, actually … but more on that later (-:< )

TL;DR: READ MORE! GET WISE, WOMEN! LET A THOUSAND READING GROUPS BLOOM!

[supercoolfelluh]

post-apocalypse headcanons pt 2!

coco st pierre vanderbilt

-she has the vibe where she uses a lot humor to cope with trauma, so she tells a lot of jokes (some childish, some dark, depending on who she's talking to), but doesn't exactly know how to show affection. her parents are super rich, so they probably didn't spend a lot of time with her and had family bonding time, so she instead, she labels the amount of calories per serving on every single snack, and labels every single compound just in case the nutritional label doesn't show

-as much as coco bickers with madison, they were somewhat nice to each other, and would give each other presents (mainly to show off their money). coco would usually buy expensive designer clothes or body washes/lotions while madi buys designer makeup and sex toys just to tease (coco would first seem disgusted but secretly takes some of them...)

-coco and mallory did everything together, and i mean EVERYTHING. they slept in the same bed, they ate meals together, they went to class together, hell, they accompanied each other to the bathroom. they never left each others side. eventually, they labeled one of their lunches as a date, and kept doing that until they had an actual confession and ended up having sex

-coco barely remembers anything of the alternate timeline, but knows that she really hurt mallory and practically spoils her. and, you know... apology sex. ya know

mallory

-she remembers everything. she fucking hates it. but she manages

-when she has nightmares or anything of the sort, coco always kisses her face to ground her (omg), and makes her hot cocoa, and jokes abt the name

-loves reading books and since shes the next supreme, she read a lot of autobiographies of past supremes and other witchy studies (EXACTLY like zoes reading)

-mal spends a lot of time with cordy, mainly because cordy is more of a mom to her than her actual mom. they do groceries together (misty and coco tag along ofc), they go on late night walks together, and all the stuff that moms are supposed to do

queenie

-cordy never actually knew why queenie left the coven, so when she found out after the apocalypse, she felt super bad. she ended up surprised queenie with a whole group of new witch students who were black, and thats how queenie was convinced into fully rejoining the coven

-queenie being on the council of witchcraft gives her way too much power, but she uses it for good. she once offered making covens open to all genders, especially because a lot of the "girls" being sent to robichaux were under the trans umbrella. even though her offer was declined, cordy had the academy renovated and made genderneutral bathrooms everywhere, and got queenie the title of "Head of Minorities in Witchcraft". queenie teaches classes on both the seven wonders and voodoo for those who are interested

-along with mal, queenie remembers all of the alternate timeline. queenie also passionately hates lady gaga's music because the voice reminds her of the countess (HA)

-is simply a queen as she has been for the entirety of her life

send me requests!

[sadaveniren]

I read some opinions here about how Harry and Louis are not together mostly because they have different values and they’re so different and that’s a thing I don’t personally agree with because I feel like I’ve seen them say the same thing about very important things in their lives and about their values and i just think that it doesn’t matter if Louis likes trash tv and Harry likes working out (examples all love to use to prove they’re so different) I just think that if your core values are still the same it doesn’t matter right

Things me and my husband (my soulmate, my business partner, my best friend, we’ve been together for … fuck i don’t even know at this point. It’s been over half our lives) don’t agree on/don’t share interests in:

- The MCU (I’m a Cap fan, my husband hates Cap with every fiber of his being)

- Shitty B movies on Netflix (my husband will see a movie on Netflix with 2.5 stars shot on a shitty camcorder and immediately turn it on so he can mystery science theater that bitch while I would rather die than waste time of BAD MEDIA)

- God (he’s an atheist, on my worst days I’m agnostic)

- whether or not Sherlock and Watson are lovers or not (me: yes him: Sherlock is an ace - possibly trans - man who finds relationships understimulating he would NEVER fall in love - and especially not with WATSON)

Things we agree on:

- our daughter is always top priority in every decision we make, both individually and as a couple

- if we can help someone in any way it is our duty as members of society and of the community to help, whether that means giving money, cooking food, providing transportation, offering a safe place to stay etc.

- if you allow one nazi (or racist, or misogynist, or homophobe, or other bigot) at the table, you have a table full of nazis etc.

- animorphs is the best YA series of all time and you cannot read the series without being radicalized (affectionate)

Notice how the ones we don’t agree on don’t weigh nearly as heavily as the things we do agree on? Who cares if my husband is never going to watch Winter Soldier even though it was my hyperfixation for 18ish months, or that I refused to learn how Yugioh worked despite it being my husband’s livelihood for the first half decade of our relationship. At the end of the day it matters more that A. We both let each other enjoy our own interests without genuine derision and B. We trust each other to always be on the same page when it comes to our end goals. Arguments and disagreements are much easier to navigate when we both know that we want the same outcome, we just don’t agree on how to get there.

Relationships aren’t about two people who are carbon copies of each other being together. Relationships involve people working towards a common goal, where that common goal ultimately helps the betterment of the people in the relationship. And this is true for all relationships, not just romantic ones! And when it comes to HL they talk A LOT about similar core values. They talk the same way when they see the future. What their end goal is for themselves and what makes them feel satisfied in their lives. It’s the kind of similar that really makes you go “they’ve talked with each other about this”. Louis says he doesn’t go to therapy but he talks like someone who has. Harry’s open about going to therapy. There’s a good chance that Louis soaks up a lot of what Harry talks about in his therapy sessions, or the therapy influences how their conversations have gone. Which is only normal.

[monsterboyfriend]

YES YOUR GENDERBEND TAGS!! One of my pet peeves is when genderbend AUs completely swap personalities and interests, and I'm like, nah man! They'd still be the same at their core, but the most interesting part of the AU at all is how despite all that, the way they'd exist in society would shape them differently. Like even if KH is still a bit odd and cold, she's also cool and artsy, and ultimately an androgynous woman is more palpable to people-- whereas DK being more Masc ™️ with her athleticism and country-ness would put her more in the face of homophobia (but also likely less so with her female peers? So interesting! Would she and FH and the other athletic glee girls get along better??)

Okay so I feel like girl!Dave (Dawn/Dove/Danielle) has a similar backstory and starting point to my ftm!Dave post. She grew up a tomboy but faced more and more social pressure to be genderconforming, and as a result doubles down on performing femininity in exchange for acceptance and in order to hide/deny her queerness.

One phenomenon I've noticed with both afab trans/nonbinary people and queer women is this "girly" phase that sometimes happens. It happened to me as a trans man from the onset of puberty until halfway through college where I really REALLY wanted to fit in (especially as an autistic person) with other kids and with what kind of girl I was expected to be. I wanted to feel normal and boys didn't even accept me in their groups. Before that I'd always flip-flopped on my gender presentation. Being trans but not knowing it, my mindset was something like "I've gotta at least try this whole 'being a woman' thing and give it my all" ya know?

I've always thought that butches were often sidelined on Glee. Probably the only time I saw a form of masculinity that felt distinctly queer was with Dave and bear culture, and both were shelved for nearly half of the show's run. And there's Sheldon, but he didn't come out until season 6. The only butch lesbian character we got was Dani, who barely got to do anything. In S2 and S3, it's implied that Santana doesn't want to be stereotyped as a butch lesbian but the show never indicates that being stone butch isn't something to be humiliated over.

So that's a big part of why girl!Dave is so appealing to me.

Back to my headcanon for girl!Dave ( @angelhummel suggested the name Dove jokingly, but I honestly think that's super cute):

So I envision Dove as being very contradictory in her gendered behavior and mannerisms. Being a longtime friend of Azimio, they're often seen together bullying the gleeks and other "losers" in the same way as canon. She's always in her Cheerio uniform though, and almost always wears the jacket over it even on warm days because she's very conscious of her body. Her and Azimio date on and off but it never goes anywhere (Az is more aware that he's a beard than she is).

She's always been more of a teammate than a friend of most of the Cheerios because they used to tease her in middle school. Her and Santana fucking hate each other. She's pretty tight with Brittany though. Dove has aspirations of being the HBIC and Head Cheerio. She's a pretty talented cheerleader, but not as dainty-looking and "pretty" as the others, so she doesn't get as much credit as she deserves.

I feel like Dove would be more willing to join Glee than Dave, because I think Dave was more concerned about seeming gay for singing and dancing than being deemed a loser (although those two are closely related in his eyes). But when people think of showchoir, they don't usually think of lesbians, although it's not surprising when lesbians end up in showchoir. So I think Dove would feel safe enough to take a chance, especially since Dave (though he pretends not to be) is VERY interested in glee club.

She and Finn would have an interesting relationship. They have a lot of the same interests and they would both probably want to date each other at some point (for different reasons of course). He would also probably (eventually) be the first person she comes out to, and he wouldn't be disappointed about it because he would still be pining for Rachel lol.

I think you're right about girl!Kurt (Kate/Liesl/Katherine/Elizabeth) in a way about her being more palatable than boy!Kurt because you can't really tell by looking at her that she's a lesbian. Remember that Kurt never officially came out to the school; everyone just automatically knew because he fit the stereotype. With Liesl, she's definitely the kind of girl that wears fashionable suits, but that could be, like, a girlboss thing. She's always been a beautiful diva ice queen who doesn't care what anyone else thinks. I'd say her initial popularity at the school was comparable to, say, Lauren Zizes before she joined Glee. She still gets slushied for being in glee club, but she doesn't get singled out. At least, not at first.

After Liesl comes out to Mercedes and then her dad in a very different version of Preggers, she gets asked out by Puck and she's like, "fuck it, I'm gay" and word spreads and she gets a lot of sexual harassment. It's kind of like IKAG, except it's ongoing. Of course, it doesn't help that she doesn't have as scary of a reputation as Santana. This all happens shortly after Dove joins the New Directions so, in true Karofsky fashion, she nopes the hell out of there and says something incredibly homophobic on her way out.

I don't think she would single out Liesl like Dave did in S2, and there are two reasons for that:

1. Dove has already befriended Liesl and they were getting along very well. She has a crush on Liesl and is in denial but she's not angry about it like Dave would be because they have friendship to fall back on. And even before Liesl came out, Dove looked up to her and thought she was really cool.

2. Because she already knows what it's like to be subjected to homophobic bullying. Middle school was really tough on her in her tomboy days. So sure, if she's panicking or needs to save face, she'll casually say some lesbophobic shit, but targeted harassment would bring up too many memories for her. The cognitive dissonance would be too intense at that point.

But I don't know. Maybe she would go after Liesl. If she did though, Azimio would 100% call her out on her bullshit because he already knows that Dove's gay, thinks she's become a miserable person to be around due to her denial, and wishes she would just get over it and stop pretending to be someone she's not. Then again, he might do that anyway.

She would decide to rejoin the glee club eventually and apologizing to Liesl, but not before reaching peak bitchy, mean-girl cheerleader levels that would put Santana to shame.

In S2 after The Sue Sylvester Shuffle and losing her Cheerio status, she would freak out because she never learned how to dress herself heterosexually and has to ask Liesl for help, and there's a reveal at the end where she steps into the halls of McKinley dressed like a baby butch and it's so sweet I'm gonna cry.

I think that's it. Sorry if I rambled too much! I wrote this intermittently for the past 8 hours!

[static-sulker]

The Process of drawing all nine mercs (Sniper And Spy)

haha I know, it's been a few months sense my last tumblr ramble and a good amount of time sense anything TF2 based. I've been really diving into my own fiction, with my book! I haven't talked here on it much, but I am a aspiring writer (cringe I know) and currently want to start getting a full book done and in my portfolio and not just dozens of short stories, which will be daunting but I think I can make it. It's been a hobby and a time consuming one at that, so I really haven't dove back into TF2 with the whole book thing, and my other hyperfixation holding me in a chokehold (COUGH COUGH fnaf, epithet erased and undertale COUGH COUGH). But now I have the mental capacity to continue this little series! Right now I have finished the designs for Scout, Spy, Sniper, Pyro, Engineer and Medic. Solider is almost done, as well as Demoman...Haven't touched Heavy's design but I promise I will soon...maybe...BUT! Today, I want to go over the silly little guys of Mundy, and Pierre (Spys headcanoned name for my canon :D) Anyways lets dive in!

Sniper

Sniper is held near and dear to my heart, but jesus fucking christ I could not get his design for a awhile. It wasn't just one thing and little tweaks, like most of the other members so far--Engineer, Medic and Spy--- whos were pretty simple to fix. Engie just had his hair, Medic on his mature features and Spy with what was behind the mask. Sniper had like 5 different core aspects that I couldn't draw when I first starting drawing team fortress. The face shape was extremely long for my styling and for the first few tries, it just felt too off. Either too small when i tried my original style and too much when I did it more accurate but less trained. his hat sucked the soul out of my body I fucking hate drawing hats. His figure at the time was hard, as when I started this journey I only drew twinks and girls, both being far younger then the main cast. So for awhile, I had to place Sniper on a shelf and studied Dell, Ludwig and Pierre more. When I finally adapted my style to older characters, I finally got to draw Sniper. His flavoring aren't much different, as the usual design was for my style. I think it's crazy that the original base game really doesn't show many visible scars on characters (besides the comics and the meet videos which were both for Sniper so that did help his design). I gave him a few bullet wounds and the Percy classic, wolfcut hair. I would give him some greyer streaks as I bet money that you don't stay to calm under the pressure in his shoes no matter how big his professional persona keeps up. Also I give him top surgery scars because I am trans. What do you expect me to do. I also gave him the trademark teeth impracticalities! He has a lot of chips and uneven teeth, cause he ya know...lives in a van. I also don't think they give dental care in popular game team fortress two.

SPY

Spys design is nothing but iconic. If you don't know the game, you probably have seen either Heavy or Spy in some type of meme template. That was the main intimidating hurdle I had to get across (as well as some minor tweaks as usual) on how to make this character still show as Spy on paper. The mask took a good while to get right, as masks were never my strongsuit, and hats. Fuck hats. Spy is really fun to draw though. My main practice to draw the characters was in dresses or formal attire if not their classic uniforms or cosmetics in the game. Spy felt so much easier to draw if I did in some type of cocktail dress or ever some flowery more formal dress. He just has the perfect slim build to work in my style. It was a fun design to recreate and I do really enjoy drawing him. The main issue, besides his mask which was an easy jump, was his face. Like. Behind the mask. I cannot tell you how I got it done, I just looked really hard at the details in popular fanfiction "Solitude, But Two" (READ IT OR DIE I DON'T MAKE THE RULES) By Lu_undy on ao3 Im rabid im crazy GRAJHAHAHA. Anyways. Ahem. I kinda just blacked out and then I had Spys face. I have him more hair as usual, and I got him a different teeth screw up. Impacted canines! it makes them look like little small fangs that are smaller then the teeth! It's really interesting and I had done a lot of just sharp canine work in Sniper and I kinda knew that already before drawing Spy. Give the man some tiny wrinkles because I want him to be angry and be disgusted by his imperfections because I love him. I also would nail him to a tree, no questions asked.