#yeah i dont need anyone to gaslight me

[a-heart-like-a-sparrow]

March 3rd, 2024 - Awkward

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Let's ignore the fact that I didn't know what to write about yesterday, so I wrote some embarrassing shit about a boy that is not worth it.

I'm not a writer. I draw. Well, at least I try to. But I'm not good at writing anything. So I can never talk about my feelings lol

Anyway, today something cool happened. I always complain about how there's nothing interesting on TV during weekends. But today my go-to channel put "Baby Driver" (2017) and I actually liked it! I've already added it to my Letterboxd.

After that I just lied on my bed until my mother suggested going out. We just stayed in the car, watching all the neighbourhoods. Then, we stopped at her shop and talked a bit with her employee. I drank my second chocolate milk of the day and ate a bunch of candy. No regrets.

Now I'm just at home, I might go to bed now. Or maybe later. I'm not sure. I'm glas I don't have P.E. classes tomorrow. They didn't tell us why tho.

I actually don't care lmao

I did thought about changing the theme of my blog again. I don't know how much I used purple for this, but I'm considering changing it to blue or red when autumn begins.

Or maybe I could use red for autumn and blue for winter. I'm not sure...

I'll see what I can do. The last time I used my computerr it had a few problems updating. I hope nothing bad happened.

Okay, that was all. Rest well.

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PS: I swear a group of men said things to me a few blocks away from my house on Friday. But since I'm a professional gaslighter against myself, I think I might have just imagined it. I don't know if it happened, but I still felt so disgusted. Whatever, the last time I tried to tell my mother about something like that, it didn't turn out well. Who cares?

I'll just change to new path to get home. And change my pants.

[isildheir]

Honestly, my abuser saying Louis was just as bad as Lestat or basically implying they hate how people write Lestat off as more abusive than he is or that Louis was just as abusive was a red flag I should've put a lot more stock into.

[snekdood]

Knowing i deserve better doesnt really do much when so many people are convinced im the devil, meaning i cant rely on them for anything let alone the better things i know i deserve

[aprilmayverse]

mayverse dash simulator 2 but this time its if they had a fandom

💀 winered Follow "we need more complex mentally ill female characters" you people couldnt even handle june july.

💄 october-november Follow why are we all acting as if april was in the wrong for not wanting to traumadump on a literal child?

👠 pinkbitchnamedbreakfast Follow she literally did not tell her anything

💄 october-november Follow did she not tell her about the poisioning.

👠 pinkbitchnamedbreakfast Follow yeah, nearly half a decade after it happened

💄 october-november Follow well was she just supposed to tell her as soon as it happened? june was like 8 or 9 at the time

👠 pinkbitchnamedbreakfast Follow i'm just saying it's fucked up of her

🌺 ithinkihauvejaundice Follow june and dys did nothing wrong. "what about the murders" god forbid a couple middle school girls have some sleepover fun. those people deserved it anyway

⛅️ evil-wifeguy-lesbian Follow june july was the realest bitch out there because if MY girlfriend needed someone dead i would do it in an instant

☀️ peacenloveonplanetsapphic Follow i don't want you to murder people for me dearest we've been over this i don't need anyone dead

🍂 littlejester Follow

🌎 thefuckingwizard Follow "february march gaslight gatekeep girlboss" this and that. wheres my february cringefailgirl truthers

🕷 thirdsilliestvriskakinnie Follow i think that if i lost a bad bitch to an arranged marriage i would do what dinah did too

🕷 thirdsilliestvriskakinnie Follow i think i hauve a mental illness

🐬 celerytheworld Follow was it casual when you promised we were going to get married as kids, were my first kiss, told me you'd be in love with me and marry me and take me on dates if one of us was the opposite gender, told me you'd love me more than your husband if we ever got married, told me you'd rather hang out with me then get married to a man, told me i'd look beautiful in a wedding dress, and then killed yourself?

🧑 normal-guy Follow op are you ok

🐬 celerytheworld Follow

🩸 murderenjoyer Follow inherent homoeroticism of killing someone together

👻 yaoifreak Follow pascal may x mr thorgett. old man yaoi anyone

🧢 whitemormonwasted Follow when i said pascal may did 9/11 this isnt what i meant

🕷 thirdsilliestvriskakinnie Follow june july is a vriska

🧣 februarymarches Follow christly shippers dont fucking interact with me! for obvious reasons! theres a four year gap there!

🌎 thefuckingwizard Follow i dont ship them but like...op how many years do you think are in between 15 and 17?

🧣 februarymarches Follow it's an eighth grader and a senior yall disgust me. four year age gap. proshitters dni is already in my bio, stop shipping a literal child with a high school senior

🕷 thirdsilliestvriskakinnie Follow 15 is not a "literal child" op

🧣 februarymarches Follow >14 in bio

⭐️ stars-discourse-sideblog Follow you're both wrong it's three years

🔥 sometimesthorgett Follow 9/11 MENTIONED

👻 yaoifreak Follow christly are both straight men anyway. if u want yaoi try pascal x thorgett

🧢 whitemormonwasted Follow those are two different characters + pascal had a wife

👻 yaoifreak Follow https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bisexuality

🕷 thirdsilliestvriskakinnie Follow 2001 and 1999 were two years apart i don't think they taught anyone on this site to read

👻 yaoifreak Follow READ?

🪼 dysapppointment Follow just saw june july's ilb design and holy shit not to be a lesbian but

🍋 thosedamnlemonstealingwhores Follow username checks out

🎱 tragedyenjoyer Follow ogigugh calendar siblings december sisters badmann siblings shiz siblings collins siblings what if i Died

🧣 februarymarches Follow just so you guys know op is a dacarol shipper. don't reblog from them.

🎱 tragedyenjoyer Follow i have bad news about the creators of the thing you're a fan of

🍂 littlejester Follow trudy cryme more like tru-deez nuts gottem

🛍️ poetrynjoyer Follow mayverse is so interesting bc you have beautiful heartfelt writing about love and loss and hope and family and friendship and romance and tragedy and loving despite with such complex women and you also have shit like "monk clickbaiter fraggot" and "9/11 porn games on steam" and whatevers going on at jms

🧲 whysoyurious Follow MAYVERSE HIT 100K F/F FICS ON AO3 WHO CHEERED

🎀 apricotmayonaise Follow making a list of who could and couldntve possibly done 9/11 in the mayverse, is doing 9/11 a sin in dana's cult?

🐝 incoherentbee Follow

YES?!??!?!?!?

[rzyraffek]

Fallout4 characters with teen!sole

Bestie you are litteraly describing one of my oc's! Of course its purley platonic😊 teen!sole is also from valut and was in fidge for last 200years. I refer to them as 'kid' bcs thats how some of characters would probably treat them anyways. Also its a screenshot vuz I accidentally deleted the ask and luckily had some sort of proof

Maccready

The only guy here with any expirence with kids

Dad vibe

Type of guy who says "We need to cut it off" after Sole tells him their hand hurts

Will teach them how to shoot, hunt ect

Also scold them every time they talk with any shady people??? Like he really doesnt want them to end up like him with whole 'gunners incident'

He thinks that Sole would get along with Duncan well!

If Sole calls him 'dad' mans gotta be so happy

Deacon

Secretly worried about their saftey, like Commonwealth is dangerous place for trained adults, and for kids ESPECIALLY ones who have no knowlage about defence or weapons

But he never shows his worries, just hangs around being cool dude he is😎😎

Rich cousin/uncle vibe

You like this cool hat you saw like week ago? Boom see it apear inside your closed 2days later

His love language (quick remidner that love also can be platonic🙄😎) is giving them little gifts when they don't see him or leaving notes with remiders on them ^^

Quick reminder that he and his wife wanted to have kids! So yeah Sole makes him wonder if thats how it feels to have kids tbh

If Sole calls him 'dad' bro will freeze and panic, probably pretending that he thought that was a joke but he's sweating so hard rn

Hancock

Wtf a child? Here?

Bestie you really shouldn't be here

If Sole is in this cringy teen phase when they do drugs/cigarettes, watch him say stuff like "drugs=bad" meanwhile taking some mentats

Your friendly local drug dealer vibe

Dude gonna teach them how to manipulate assholes, trow knifes, gaslight and still look stylish

If Sole ever tells him about their parents he will be angry, like ??? Why would anyone do anything to a kid???

He will litteraly pay fahrenheit to watch them when he's busy

Preson

"Fire, pretty sky and a lot of storytelling in middle of nowhere" vibe

Im 100% sure he knows how to play on guitar and will try to teach them

He will try to act mature and lead them to the right path but he won't try to be their "new perent" unless Sole is clear that they see him as father figure, he will never even bring this up.

When they call him 'dad' mans will be the happiest minuteman in history. Also if kid will even mention their past caretakers he will just tell them to forget about them cuz they aren't coming back and they are never going to hurt Sole anymore

Gage

How on earth some kid killed Colter? No one knows but Gage is impressed.

He gets annoyed by lack of knowlage and skills, ye ye he gets that they are like 13 or something but come on hes not going to do anything for them. Huh what do you mean you are from valut? Before the war?? Damn kid and im happy to be alive. Stop lying

*sighs* "jesus boss let me do it"

Older brother vibes.

"How many times i have to tell you, dont hang out with pack members they have bad influence on you AND do not even think about going near Nisha"

He needs to learn ALOT he dumped his family and even if he had younger siblings he never really took care of anyone, never, so yeah it is challenging

If Sole somehow calls him 'dad' they were probably incredibly tired or something very emotional happened. No matter how it happend Gage will ignore it and later overthink when Sole wont be around, like ??? Me??? Gee what kind of parental figure this kid had?? Should I check on them more often??

Danse

Uhh erm a child ee greeting?

Akward

At first he sees Sole as lil civilan and just tells them where to find nearest safe place/diamond city cuz hes very very busy and cant take care of child while on duty. If kid hangs around more he will probably warm up

Of course he will ask about their parents but when Sole tells him some upsetting stuff he won't ask again, he won't tell them to go home either. He will just idk let them vibe

I can imagine Sole just tagging along his missions by just begging him to hang out with them constantly. They quickly get along. Very lonley soldier and kid who lost everyone.

One of those 'depressed dude adopts random child he found in middle of knowhere' prompt

When Sole calls him 'dad' he gonna get emotional fr fr pls civilan he's on duty he cant cry rn 😭

Yall I loved writting for gage i might do part 2 with Gage just trying to figure out how kids work. Also another pole cuz I still have no clue how to delete those on phone. And as always, I used x reader tags ONLY to reach bigger audience 🦊

[am-that-dog]

Hello! So, I got something I need to talk about, and this is targeted to anyone with D.I.D.

I've been questioning if I have had D.I.D for a few years, and I have a whole paragraph I've written down already with some things I've personally experienced.

So, i think i have D.I.D? I don't know. Sometimes my body doesn't even feel like mine or my thoughts dont feel like mine. Ive been gaslighting myself saying "oh its just my autism" or "oh its just because im having a kinshift" but i don't even know anymore. I don't know if i have what some people say "multiple people in my head" because everything just sounds like multiple people, because im told I have a very active imagination.

All i here is voices atp and i talk to myself in my head 24/7, but i actually have no idea if its just me, or what some people will call multiple people inside my head. It doesn't exactly help the fact i often have greyouts and sometimes blackouts and just dont remember shit. And the co conscious thing isn't exactly helping either because it feels like thats happening multiple times a day. I genuinely Don't know whats happening.

But the thing is im also doubting being a system or anything because i personally don't think my trauma is that bad (minus 7th grade, but that was something else) I mean, yeah my mama left me when i was like 5 and neglected me b4 then and randomly wants back in my life now, but thats like the worse thing. (Minus 7th grade again.)

So i just genuinely dont know. And my confusion is fucking scaring me. And, I'm sorry if I did get some things wrong about D.I.D, im still researching about it, and I'm trying my best to learn still. I've gotten a lot of info from my system friends, but I do understand that not everyone is like that. So again, I apologize if I did something wrong.

Also, for those who are new to my page, I'm also a fictionkin otherkin, and a therian, so I also don't really know if this is me just randomly having kinshifts or what. But I just genuinely need y'alls help. Please, anything will work.

[macabrecravings]

yes hello i heard you asked for harper propaganda so im coming to your rescue. i am assuming the gaslighting puts you off and I UNDERSTAND even for me it was an acquired taste but here are some of their charm points that i think people dont see at a glance

1. they love you. straight up they are infatuated with you. vrel has said that theyre kylar level obsessed they just happen to be more patient. vrel has also said that they for the most part dont treat other patients the way they treat pc and that they take every opportunity possible in their busy schedule to see them.

2. ik people see them as this insidious manipulator and yeah to some degree thats true but theyre such a fucking fail when you read between the lines. cums in their pants just from touching you. harper nobody is believing that having me kiss you is legitimate therapy and it doesnt help that youre LIKE 25 and do every medical/psychological profession under the sun what degree you have to have your staff hypnotized or something. blushes when you initiate anything. blushes when you have a big dick. virginity lines are shit like "say ahh" "please try to relax, im going to administer a suppository" "its time for your prostate exam" like ok buddy sure youre still trying to pretend to be professional while youre balls deep in my ass, just admit you have a roleplay kink

3. theyre so smug and its so fucking funny "nothing good on tv i take it" when you have your second pregnancy SHUT UP LMAO

4. their favoritism of pc is so blatant bc they dont give a flying fuck about ANYONE else. that scene where they have a random med student there to help examine you. the fact that theyve forgotten the students name,, who fucking cares theyre just there to feed harpers voyeurism kink now uh student. whatever your name is help me collect this cum out of pcs holes its for research i promise

ill spare you and stop myself here but ty for reading

omfg. asylumdweller themself coming to spread harper brainrot to me??? i’m honored….

Literally no better person to convince me than you LMFAOOO. WHEN YOU PUT IT LIKE THAT …… Okay yeah, yeah, the gears r turning I see the appeal now. 🤔

BAHAHAH. Harper, I’m sorry for not giving u a fair chance 😔 It’s my Whitney situation all over again … Hated them based off of the first ick I got. (Even though I clearly would enjoy their scenes and content if I didn’t judge a book by its cover PLSNDBDNF….)

Aw :( Love an obsessive, pathetic man. Fictional insidious manipulators are fun as fuck, look at my boy Cain <3 He’s the worst and I need him so carnally. Also, cringefail loser? I see… *nodding solemnly and taking notes*

“Nothing good on tv i take it?” IS FUNNY AS FUCK STOP IAIWJDNFBFN

THANK U FOR UR TIME AND EFFORT WRITING THIS!! /gen

i have much to think about ….

[idsb]

This happened to me too with lover and evermore so i just quit fandom and it was the best! Lol obv im back here and it feels good to come back for what you enjoy and then leave and live in your own life when you want.

Connecting these songs to my life mainly involves listening to them on the train, in the car and attaching images of your life into them. You'll find your way into them when you have a certain kind of day and you go and choose one to play and it HITs. That's the long term pay off! Don't stress. I bet you dont have all the lyrics memorised yet (who could) and each time you hear one properly for the first time or sing it from memory it will feel different.

Sending love!

Thanks for sharing your similar experience bestie 🥺 yeah I truly have been feeling like I need to take a break from the fanbase always about a month after new album releases- peace and love to how anyone interprets stuff, it’s genuinely not anything against anybody, but my response to midnights so fully IN the fanbase vs this album and the first 4 days I spent totally blindfolded, really illustrated to me how the way I appreciate new albums is really incompatible with the fandom experience - and somehow unique to this fandom: for example there was a lot of hot gossip surrounding Sour, and everyone knew who it was about, but to my knowledge no one was going in with a fine-tooth comb to dissect exactly what Joshua Basset did. I love to talk about Taylor and I love dissecting the album for like, literary themes and in the end finding the plot Taylor intended months and years down the line is great! but yeah it’s not for me the moment I hear the album.

Sorry for the tangent but anyways!!! I guess I worry that knowing these plot lines make it harder for me to find my way in: like getting inside of a circle made out of a dotted line (I knew some details which were obvious but wasn’t connecting the dots to a concrete picture) vs getting inside of one that is a complete drawing, struggling to find a crack or an opening because it’s already a complete picture.

I think this would be the case for any song of hers: imagine not just knowing the Vibe of Dear John, but unlocking (I’m 100% making this up for example), “John Mayer took her virginity and then cheated on her with Jennifer Anniston and then gaslighted her to the fact that it was actually happening so she kept sleeping with him before breaking it off” as background info after hearing it a few times. Suddenly it’s not ‘deep song about being burned by a manipulative older man’, it’s THAT and that only. Every lyric points to that and evidence of that, not the general theme. You hear it and are thinking about What John Mayer Did and He Sucks For Doing This To Her, not the emotions drawn from dealing with the vague events she is describing

Anyways what you said is very true and very beautiful and I appreciate it 🥺 that’s just the facet I’m struggling with

[deathleadsarc]

heyyy

somethings been on my mind recently, for a few months, and i dont know whats making it pile up like it is, but it is. clearing my dash has been helping, but with this underlying problem i feel like some other change needs to be made and im not sure how or what to do

a long while ago, someone i had been friends with and shipping with for a long while had started to gaslight me and really only wanted to write if i was writing nsfw with them. eventually they started shipping with an aged-up muse and when i got uncomfortable with it sommmmmmmmmme stuff happened and it made me feel very hesitant to pursue shipping or really talk to people anymore. i was made to feel very used and like what i wanted didnt matter. that any problems i had with my muse or with what they were saying was just me making issues out of nothing, always in the wrong, even when in my head i knew i was right, that sending things in was annoying, and that my excitement was 'cringe' haha. sometimes, im very afraid to bring up my ideas or my feelings because i dont want to seem annoying. when i was told often that, yeah, sending in things about our muses is 'annoying'

i was very hesitant to get close to anyone at all, or send them anything, or give out my actual ideas because of how much hurt i was put through. (without getting too into it). i was so open to giving my real ideas, to sending things about ships, to openly speak on my muse - which ive been doing much much better at - but still, its really held me back.

i used to write so much. i used to explore the ideas i really loved and wanted to do. but ive gone back in time to when i was so unbearably nervous to approach even the people ive been friends with for years. im trying hard to work on this, i really am, i just pray for your patience with me as i learn to cope better with what happened. im so sad that i cant write as much because of this. its never been the job i had, or the time, its all because of this crap that happened. i wish i never met that person, so i could be the same as i was, but it cant be the same at all anymore.

im paranoid to talk, im scared to post about my character or even myself, yes even to people ive known for decades on this site. this hobby i really loved is being ruined by my own head and i dont know how to fix it myself

but im trying hard, i really am, please understand. im a shaking little doggy while a thunderstorm is outside, i just, need to calm myself out from under the bed. you know?

[rin-enjoyer]

I think a critical part of creating a Rin I would enjoy writing is that her mask should not only a source of delicious angst, but that she also just has fun with it. Deciding to inject fun into a not ideal situation sounds like her already.

As an aside, I’ve headcanoned for a while now that Kakashi’s famous “Haha, yup! <3,” in response to Naruto’s poisoning and imminent death was a stolen aspect of Rin’s attitude.(he really said it’s free real estate) That’s the kind of responses I’m imagining.

Anyways, let me explain. Most everyone has an impression that Obito and Kakashi are a pair of dysfunctional screaming cats and Rin is the long-suffering polite little angel. She notices this and decides to keep the charade up so that she can cash in on it occasionally. But her team can be a migraine making machine, and sometimes you have to be mean to people who are mean to you. For your health. In Rin’s case she has to do it in a way that can’t be perceived as mean(Now we don’t have time to unpack all of that) So her frustration manifests as cheery passive aggression, saying sappy things that she knows will annoy them, or not engaging with whatever concerning thing is happening(see above). It’s not that she’s never kind for the sake of being kind, it just gets tiring after a while, and it’s so fucking funny to be so disgustingly nice and oblivious it makes Kakashi go insane. He might even suspect it’s an act but she either gaslights him or nobody else believes him. He probably gets more of her ire than obito, who usually has good intentions and is just stupid about it. I think her act works especially well on Minato since he’s the unfortunate exhausted person who has to deal with their team. So pulling out the ‘easy child’ card gets her special treatment for sure.

Bonus points if Kushina figures her Nice Act out and she and Rin use it to cover for pranks.

oh yeah absolutely rin is a huge troll. when she is not seething/dissociating. i think,,, that minato of course falls for the "easy child" card very very hard. but i also think that obito and kakashi dont really see past her facades either. up until obito 'dies' at least. ok well obito is VERY tangled up in rin as like,,, an Ideal, even after he leaves konoha and she dies, and that doesnt ever change (in the canon timeline.) kakashi on the other hand,, i think he just. is bad at reading people for a really large chunk of his early childhood (its the trauma. and the autism). and like by the time he hits anbu/meets tenzo hes still a socially awkward gremlin but now he at least has basic observation skills!!!! but when he was hanging with rin,, i do not think he had the mental bandwidth to seriously examine her behavior or the capacity to interpret it.

anyways. this creates an odd dynamic where kakashi views rin as kind of,, childish?? naive?? actually kakarin dynamic is something i probably need to elaborate on in another post i have Many thoughts about them. but the important thing here is that all the other members of team minato seriously dont question whether or not rin is being sincere because it doesnt occur to them to question that since her facade matches with a lot of their preconceived notions of a girl like her VERY well. which means that a lot of time (for obito and minato, at least,) rin trolling results in them gritting their teeth and telling themselves that she doesnt mean anything by it and shes just trying to be nice (she is naught)

when it's just rin and kks post bridge, i think that 1-rin lets her mask slip by way of just. spending a LOT more time with kakashi than she has ever spent with anyone else and 2- kakashi internalizes a lot of her more trollish behavior, yeah, as like. A Normal Thing To Do. because he's in the process of rewriting his entire personality from scratch and rin's ALWAYS super normal!!! i know a lot of people headcanon the sukea persona to be based off of rin, and honestly i agree with that wholeheartedly. what is Rin if not a mask to be taken on and off.

on kushina: kushina is the embodiment of "fake it till you make it" to me but SPECIFICALLY in regards to like. being happy. if she is SMILING she is HAPPY and if she isnt happy then she will be soon!!!! yes i know theres not a ton of canon basis for this but kishimoto can get his women back as soon as he starts giving them personalities besides "mom". what was i talking about. oh yeah basically kushina and her weird personality stuff directly parallels rin and her weird personality stuff and so kushina HAS noticed that sometimes there is something a little Off about rin. but she dismisses it as the same kind of """"coping"""" that she herself is doing and never really sits down for a conversation about it with rin. fascinating.

anyways. i think more often than not rin indulges in trolling not because she enjoys the results(well she does thats definitely part of it) but also because she likes to prove to herself that even when she's not keeping up the mask she is keeping up the mask. especially because the way i see it most of her pranks would be like. entirely social. stirs the conversation subtly towards uncomfortable subjects For Fun. its her enrichment. i think one week she wakes up and decides that minato NEEDS to explain the birds and the bees to kks+obt (notable orphans). for her amusement. that kind of thing.

[roxyzwritez]

Stevens Trauma, and My Own Parallels.

tw: SH, su1c1d3 mentions, mental unwellness. this post gets fucking depressing. under the cut is my tale. im definitely not channeling that one person who makes detailed and really good analyses of stevwn universe... completely unrelated haha impatheticsometimes

alright. steven meltdown arc. love it.

i dont have ptsd but there are definitely relatable parts. "i need to help everyone and forget about myself" is how i spent covid. very (unintentionally) toxic atmosphere with my old friend group. a congregation of mentally unstable teens. everyone, essentially daily, having hard suicidal moments. and me panickimg and trying to talk them out of it. i wasnt amazing at it cuz they tried anyway, maybe going back at the last minute. never lost anyone, prob out of hard luck. the need to help. i was exhausted but i kept going. our collective signal for feeling suicidal was a :) and every time i see it i feel uneasy. even if only for a second. but it doesnt go away. its horrifying. i see it and i start overanalyzing the context it was used. does this person want to commit? how can i help? ok maybe i do have some trauma.

not talking abt my problems to make ppl happy. the amount of times i wanted to kms and i put a little :) in my status and id get flooded with messages. it felt painfully nice having ppl care (genuinely painful: hated myself. ppl being warm and supportive and caring made me cry and made me ANGRY. i felt like a fraud- oh hey, that sounds familiar!) and i would be like nono, see im fine. id essentially try to weakly gaslight my fucking friends into believing i was perfectly fine. oh that status saying i want to die? idk what ur talking about bro... not me! that post in my channel talking abt me hating myself? ur just imagining things. guess what? i knew that was wrong. it made me hate myself even more. i put up barriers and cut myself off from my closest ppl. i actually blocked people or just ignored them. i would push ppl away and, somehow despite their own problems, they still stuck by my side. god i would subtly ask for help and then get upset when someone answered. id be like no this isn't how youre supposed to do this. id be like you dont know how bad i am. im so horrible. (i had fuel for this too- i am into very taboo shit and i hate it honestly. yeah its fiction but i just. eygh. its all just trauma related im assuming but that doesnt help.) of course i never shared exactly what but i hoped they'd take my word for it. they always saw thru my bullshit lol.

one time. someone who was very good at comforting me was tryinh to get me to imagine a happy place. just to think of when im feeling bad. i was having none of it. but they did the right thing and continued. i freaked the fuck out and deleted my channel- with months of history. gone. and i blamed them. i was so angry at myself and them but more so me. i was so horrible there. i was like YOU COULDVE JUST STOPPED LIKE I TOLD YOU TO. i made them feel like shit.

i lost my train of thought but yeah as cr1tikal said, that's about it have a good o-

[autistook]

CW: manip. past relationship, SA

Tonight on remembering my past traumas, here are some lovely things my ex boyfriend said to me because I need them out of my system:

- Admitted he thinks I'm a whore (I showed some thigh in a photo on instagram)

- I want my ex back

- But I want you

- *slurs*

- She had better x than you

- But I love you more

- But I love her more

- I wouldn't cheat on you

- Sorry I led a double life for a year, I never dumped my ex like I told you

- I want to break up

- Nvm I wanna be together

- I kinda want her tho

- You're making that up

- I never said that

- I didn't mean it like that

- Although I did mean it in a worse way

- Its not because of you

- But I did stop having sex with you because you gained weight

- Your weight gain doesn't bother me

- You're not my type, tattoos, piercings....

- But I want to be with you

- I want children

- But I don't want them with you

- You're not as pretty as my ex

- I dont know if I wanna be with you

- Stop gaslighting me (I called him out on his behavior)

- I want you more than anyone

- I never said that (100x during our relationship)

- Your friend is a whore (has a vivid sex life, but shes a woman so its different than if it was a man)

- You had sex while we were broken up? Whore (mind you, this was while he had a whole ass girlfriend in another city and he led a double life)

- I'm sorry, I didn't think you would mind (for filming me without permission during)

- Its hot (keeping folders of every convo and picture and secret picture he has taken of me or any other exes when i found out)

- Lie part 2939383920

- Everything okay? "Mhmmm *crying*." Alright. *snores* (after I said no, I'm tired from work and he forced me anyway.

And many more. Thanks, had to get this out of my system tonight. If he ever reads this, fuck you <3

// edit ah yes forgot to add these following ones:

- Ideally I would be with the both of you so I could have both good qualities

- *crying* YOURE NEVER GONNA TRUST ME AGAIN (yeah, i ended up comforting him after he cheated on ME)

- told me he sees me as his property and object

[toournextadventure]

JUST SO I DONT ANNOY YOUR NOTIFICATIONS IM JUST GONNA DUMP THESE ALL HERE

Birb : Why would you think any of this was a good idea?

Wednesday: Probably because I'm a dangerous sociopath with a long history of violence.

Birb :

Wednesday: I don't know how you keep forgetting this.

—

Birb : That's greatly offensive to my people.

Wednesday : College dropouts?

—

Birb, at Wednesday’s funeral: I need a moment with them.

Everyone else at the funeral: Of course. *leaves*

Birb, leaning over Wednesday’s coffin: Okay, listen here you little shit. I know you’re not dead.

Wednesday, sitting up in the coffin: Yeah, no shit.

—

Birb: WHY DID YOU KILL HIM?! HE COULD HAVE HAD HOPES AND DREAMS, HE COULD HAVE HAD A FAMILY!!!

Wednesday: Birb-

Wednesday: It- it was just an ant-

—

Birb : Ayo, what the FUCK is this?!?

Wednesday , sitting down, surrounded by corpses: I won Mafia, that’s what.

—

Wednesday : How would you like your coffee?

Birb : As dark and as bitter as my soul.

Wednesday , looking at someone behind the counter: I need one vanilla latte with extra cream and sugar.

—

Wednesday: What’s your type!?

Birb, bleeding out: Black hair, 5’1, goth, a talking hand for a companion-

Wednesday:

Wednesday: your blood type.

Birb: Bro, I don’t know.

—

Birb: Wednesday is playing hard to get.

Birb: Little do they know, I'm a master at playing hard to get rid of.

—

Birb: Hey, Wednesday. What kind of flowers do you prefer?

Wednesday: I like dahlias.

Birb, pulling out a bouquet of knives: Well, shit-

—

Birb: Wait, what's going on? Are we all talking about how hot Wednesday is? Because Wednesday is a straight up sexual fox riding a red-hot nuclear bombshell right toward the yowza plaza in the heart of Babe City, Assachusetts, U S A. The last A just stands for more ass.

—

Birb: Wednesday is a little bitch.

Enid : Why?

Birb: Number one, she’s little. Number two, she’s a bitch.

—

Enid: You use emoji’s like a straight person.

Birb: That’s literally the worst thing anyone has ever said about me.

—

Enid : I feel like doing something stupid.

Birb : I’m stupid, do me.

Wednesday, from the other room: I THINK THE FUCK NOT.

—

Birb: I can't take this anymore, someone needs to take me out!

Wednesday: In a dating type of way, or an assassination type of way?

Birb: surprise me

—

Birb: Even Wednesday and I have been getting closer. The other day, she gave me half of her sandwich.

Wednesday: I mistook them for a garbage can.

—

Wednesday: Birb, you're an asshole

Birb: You are what you eat Wednesday.

Wednesday:

Birb:

Wednesday:

Birb: OH WAIT.

—

Wednesday: There’s no “I” in team, but there is one in pizza.

Birb: So, you’re not going to share?

Wednesday: I’m not going to share.

—

Wednesday : Birb , no.

Birb : Birb , yes.

—

Wednesday: Gaslight, Gatekeep, Girlboss

Birb:

Birb: Wednesday, you just go arrested for battery

🫐

No wait all of these are perfect I'm OBSESSED with these you came up with some GEMS

[cleverpaws]

NOT. a generation loss blog

dee en eye if you support that man and that skeleton and what they did in that cage..

actually im keeping the title like that its so fucking funny to me

salutation i am michael (he/they) and uh. get intro post'd x100 - bi and/or gay whichever is more comedically convenient - aro ace & apl spec fool. peace and life - nonbinary dude 🎸🎸⚡⚡⚡⚡ there's no comma there for a reason - average EX library volunqueer again :( - king of the wildly inconsistent art & writing styles <- Update we figured out why this was. you'll never guess - cartoonist 💯💯 - Mongoose/weasal/etc - i love 2 run around and have wild frolicking visions of Character - adhd. autism. npd. maybe ocd. long ago the four nations ruled in harmony - the original #1 hetch fan (shared title) - plural btw. i will now gaslight the internet into thinking i was open about this the whole time and you all just missed it - ^ u probably wont meet many other headmates just bc our switches r mostly passive influence and very short-lived. except shilo. shilo really likes tumblr for some reason

I RUN @showfallmanagement AND @lostnfounder THE SHOWFALL ASKBLOGS!!! COME SAY HI!!!

ALSO MORE RECENTLY STARTED @notslmccl do NOT go look at "chase" and do NOT poke him with sticks

dream team fans and harry potter fans you are not welcome here!! TRANSGENDER BLAST RAHH 💥💥

also no, people who think queer labels can "contradict" each other you are not welcome here either 💥💥💥 * my bi gay aroace nonbinary guy energy explodes you x100 *

things i am not normal about: - GENLOSS!!!!!!!!!! 4️⃣ - ^ and, by extension, ENCOREVERSE!!!!!!!! 🌈 - BITB!!!!!!!! - JRWI IN GENERAL I JUST PUT BITB FIRST!!!! - SPLATOON!!!!!!!!!! 🦑🦑🦑🦑🐙🐙🌊🌊 - MINECRAFT!!!!! - HOLLOW KNIGHTTTTT!!!! 🐛🐛🐛🐛🐛🐛🐛🐛🐛🐛🐛🐛🐛🐛🐛🐛🐛🐛🐛🐛🐛🐛 - ANGELS JUST LIKE AS A CONCEPT!!!!!!!!! - BODY HORROR!!!!! - VIDEO ESSAYS!!!!!!!!

things i am actually somewhat normal about (casual interests): - dsmp!!! - tdp 💪 love hate relationship - ghibli movies - cartoons in general! - assorted indie horror games - indie animation usually

i tag any and all posts that contain hetch with "#hetch generation loss" and any and all remotely sneeg/frank related posts with. shocker. "#sneeg/frank" go nuts gay people ("#asks" are also tagged)

(and if you go through "#saving this" you will find my many artist resources, recipes, and the occasional Insanely Good Post i think about every day)

ALSO!!! im like Never serious on here ever but just 4 the record (i dont even know if anyone will see this) please do not call me ur friend if i dont know you!! 😭 im aplatonic and while i do still have ppl i consider friends its personally just weird for me to be forced into friendships by people i literally havent interacted with that much (even if we're mutuals!!!!! sah ree guys) (saying stuff like "my friend" at the end of msgs in like that semi joking tone is fine tho)

how ever...... mutuals r totally free 2 ask for my discord or msg me on here 💯💯

also if you EVER need me to explain any encoreverse lore to you i will drop everything to do so 😍😍

(all banners n images r mine except the mcytblr sexyman voted one by @/tmmyhug and the sonic narc abuse one by @/nicepersondisorder)

skittering sounds alright ill get out of your hair . the particles aren't though. yeah sorry man they uh. they really get stuck in there. sorry

[mrstsung]

Me at mk12/mk1 shang:

Baby you did no wrong. The narrative does you wrong. Tells us you can never be forgiven yet other characters do horrible shit (maybe even worse) and get off scott free cuz the narrative and story told you to hate him. Instead of using your brains to think for once in your god damn lives. Calling shang lazy because he's poor,down on his luck trying to survive in this game. Ableist shitlords who tell poor people and minority groups to "put in honest work and youll get somewhere" or "shang tsung is always a liar" when a supposed "good version exists"?! Are you shitting me?! He deserve nice things. Every excuse i see seems to be wanting to demonize a character that in the story actually didn't deserve it. And by all means is valid in their anger. Shang tsung deserves better. But most of all he deserves the heads of those responsible for giving him a wretched life. So fuck nrs and fuck liu kang stans.

You deserve so much more. Shang tsung stans,my fellow tsimps. Please do him actual justice. That doesn't involve shipping him with everyone on the roster. You know actually write something worth a lick.

Also Me at mk12/mk1 liu kang and anyone who justifies him in the narrative now:

That's not my liu kang and honestly liu should have stayed dead.

Nah i won't apologize.

Hating on this man for the predicaments that you gaslight him on in a situation where liu kang has every fucking means and power to actually change shit or ya know stand up to his superiors. Does nothing. Nobody's calling out these god/titans. And look where that gets our faves.

So liu kang is just as at fault if not more.

You dont give him nearly as much shit as you give raiden as a God and yet unlike raiden

LIU KANG DESERVES TO GET FUCKING YELLED AT,CALLED OUT AND SOME FUCKING CONSEQUENCES FOR HIS BLUNDERS. but yet....he doesn't really. Just sad kitty mew mew faces and a slap on the wrist.

Meanwhile shang tsung has to pay for crimes he did WHILE HE WAS TRYING TO SURVIVE AND ACTUALLY FUCKING DO SOMETHING ABOUT THE PROBLEMS.

Dont give that "oh but evil shang" did what? Whos to say it wasn't the same shit? But instead of God liu kang,it was raiden? So same shit. Plus like i said a good shang exists. So....what is the actual excuse to not feel bad for shang. Even a lil bit?

So same shit different god. Nothing got changed. Nothing worth of lick to the story actually happened.

So what did we actually do differently that was worth it?

Nothing.

Like how am i supposed to love these supposed "good guys" but all they do is follow orders,not question shit,follow narrative,and run around like bumbling idiots? How am i supposed to root for someone who legitimately ruined the lives of others by not actually helping.

If gods actually can do all this shit in mks world. Like they say. If these beings are oh so powerful. Then show it. Because if not. Then they are just as flawed and are no better then the supposed mortals.

Gods in mk use mortals as cattle for their own amusement would be the narrative that mk needs so desperately. And for shang tsung of all people to call that shit out and actually do something about it and do a NOBLE DEED. Would be fucking amazing.

But nope y'all want your boring stale unseasoned trope of "uwu evil guy to beat up because me good guy cant possibly be an asshole in the wrong uwu"

What drove shang to evil....is the lack of actually love and care from someone that was supposed to protect him. He had a hard time trusting others. So.....help him trust again? Help him and guide him better? Maybe he needs a lil bit different teaching technique? He obviously didn't take pleasure in lying or stealing or selling to make ends meet. Obviously there was a reason. Whos to say the people wouldn't find any excuse to hate shang even if he was making an honest living? Whos to say that they wouldn't find a way to other him in the narrative as some of y'all seem to be doing?

So yeah nothing changed.

same shit. Different god. That's all that fucking changed. Period.

It's a mid game. And thats me being very very generous. If shang wasn't in it and used as fucking sale bait. I bet you it wouldn't even get off half the fucking attention it's gotten. And even then it's waning as we speak. (Good)

Say what you want but there is no valid reason to hate shang tsung. You can say he's not your fave. You can say he's done deliciously cold Blooded shit. I'd agree with you.

But dont ever say it was for no reason. He has every right to fuck the gods up.

This man is a survivor of a game that was rigged from the start.

And by god he still despite taking unnecessary L's . He stays winning because i feel he's more popular than any other character on the roster. Simply by being the lovely bastard he is.

People would argue that sub zero or scorpion are the best. Not anymore. They aint even the right ones.

Kenshi is only popular because pretty guy lewis tan(he's cute but by god fans of him are irritating) plays him and people want anime sword dude. Outside of that niche what does he actually have to offer the narrative and story beyond his part. Nothing. Unpopular opinion but...His son was cooler anyways.

Johnny cage is cool but only in small doses otherwise he's insufferable. And he's even mid tier in mk12/mk1. That jean claude van damme skin is the only reason people came back for johnny and i genuinely feel that was also a sale bait. Because they knew they couldn't beat tekkens sales nor street fighter. And had to rush shit out to even be noticed.

It reeks of "notice me younger generation. We still have the cool toys." It's desperate for the glory days that never will come.

People are tired of the mediocre.

You had an opportunity to actually shake shit up. But nope nrs just wants an injustice game so bad but have to appease the impatient mk fans. I say this as a long time mk fan. We are our own worst enemy.

But enough venting.

I'll get back to shang tsung posting soon.

Some actual good food.

Just lemme simmer down and cook a bit.

[toothlespoggers]

”Why are you sad” WHY ARE YOU HAPPY? HOW CAN YOU BE HAPPY WHEN THE ONLY WAY YOU CAN FEEL JOY IS BY HAVING ENOUGH MONEY TO GO DO STUFF THAT IS FUN IN THE MOMENT BUT ULTIMATELY STILL LEAVES YOU EMPTY INSIDE BECAUSE NO MATTER WHAT YOU DO THE WORLD IS BEING FUCKED OVER IN A MILLION DIFFERENT WAYS BY PEOPLE WHO DONT HAVE COMMON SENSE AND THERES NO HOPE IN TRYING TODO ANYTHING ABOUT IT BECAUSEIT JUST DOESNT WORK. HOW ARE YOU HAPPY WHEN ITS IMPOSSIBLE TO BE ON THE INTERNET WITHIUT SEEING EVERYTHING BAD IN THE WORLD. THE ONLY WAY TO BE “HAPPY” IS TO BE AWAY FROM LITERALLY EVERYTHING, HAVE EVERYTHING CONTROLLED AND PERFECT. AND HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO ISSUES. UNTIL YOU DIE. BECAUSE EVERYTHING ELSE, WALKING DOWN THE STREET, EATING, SLEEPING. EVERYTHING JUST REMINDS YOU THAT SOMEONE ELSE IS CONSTANTLY SUFFERING FOR NO FUCKING REASON AND THERES NOTHING YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT BECAUSE YOURE A CHILD. AND SOMEHOW ADULTS DONT CARE. THEY DONT CARE ABOUT THE DEATHS. THEY DONT SEE THE BLOODSTAINS ON EVERYTHING AROUND THEM. THEY SOMEHOW AVOID IT ALL.

WHY ARE YOU HAPPY? BECAUSE BEING SAD. BEING ANYTHING ELSE. IS TOO DIFFICULT. WHAT ARE WE JUST SUPPOSED TO ROLL OVER WHEN SOMEONE ASKS IF YOURE OK? NO. BECAUSE THIS IS HOW EVERYTHING WOULD GO

“hey man, you ight?”

“NO I AM NOT ALRIGHT, EVERYTHING IS AWFUL EVERYTHING IS BAD. THE “GOOD” IS MOSTLY JUST GASLIGHTING, A SUNNY LITTLE PICTURE OF FALSE HOPES AND PROMISES TO CALM YOU DOWN AND KEEP SOCIETY FUNCTIONING BECAUSE IN REALITY EVERYTHING IS BAD, THE BAD COMES SO MUCH AND THE GOOD IS SO SPARSE YOU HAVE TO PHYSICALLY REMIND YOURSELF OF IT, AND IF EVERYTHINGS OK WOULDNT IT BE EASY TO FIND OUT GOOD NEWS INSTEAD OF DIGGING THROUGH THE INTERNET TO FIND ANYTHING? ISNT IT RIDICULOUS THAT WE ARE LABELLED AS “MENTALLY ILL” FOR HAVING FUCKING COMMON SENSE? WE ALL REALISED AS SOON AS WE GAINED SENTIENCE

“HEY WOW, ACTUALLY THE WORLD IS KINDA HORRIBLE!” AND INSTEAD OF FIXING IT EVERYONE ELSE WAS LIKE “YEAH BRO MAYBE YOU SHOULD TALK TO SOMEONE ABOUT THAT, YOURE CRAZY. THE WORLD ISNT AWFUL! LOOK AT OUR LITTLE RICH WHITE NEIGHBOURHOOD, EVERYTHING IS PERFECT AND NOTHING IS WRONG! YOU ARE STUPID FOR THINKING THIS.”

LIKE BRO. NO??? ITS NOT OK? I DONT “GET SAD” I AM SAD. THIS ANXIETY DEPRESSION, COCKTAIL NEVER SUBSIDES. IT IS JUST IGNORED. REPEATEDLY. BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO FORGOT TO SURVIVE.

YOU HAVE TO GRIT YOUR TEETH, WIPE YOUR EYES AND DISSOCIATE. BECAUSE YOU KNOW DEEP DOWN IN YOUR HEART THAT NOTHING WILL EVER CHANGE FOR THE BETTER. YOU HAVE TO HAVE THE MINDSET OF:

“Well Im alive now, I might as well enjoy it” BECAUSE THAT IS LITERALLY ALL YOU CAN DO.

I WANT. TO BELIEVE. IN THE POSITIVES.

WE ALL DO.

BUT LOOK AROUND.

IT WOULD LITERALLY TAKE A MIRACLE, NOT A SMALL ONE. A NATIONAL. WORLD WIDE. MASSIVE MASSIVE MASSIVE MIRACLE. TO FIX THINGS.

BUT THATS NOT GOING TO HAPPEN.

YOU CANT EVEN TAKE COMFORT IN RELIGION BECAUSE RELIGION IS LIKE “yeah no everythings gonna be like really bad and get worse and worse until everyone dies”

like. SERIOUSLY.

so NO. I am not “ok” and if you are. Congratulations. You’ve achieved a level of ignorance I TRULY wish I could obtain.

you wanna know why NO ONE TALKS LIKE THIS?

BECAUSE IF EVERYONE ON EARTH KNEW THIS. EVERYTHING WOULD COLLAPSE.

And I’m not saying you can’t be happy. YOU CAN! I am often happy! I have a lot of good moments. Life is worth living! Until a certain point you can always experience joy. There will always be SOMETHING. Good.

I’m sorry it sucks. I want it to change, I want to be happy. I want to go outside knowing that there’s a future, that there isn’t just misery ahead of me.

but I can’t do anything about it.

I can’t seek therapy. I can’t tell anyone.

because all they do is try and get me to be happy again, different strategies!! Different Methods! Different medication! So much medication :,D but I’m tired of people telling me not to be sad.

Stop trying to fix the individuals with drugs and cheesy advice.

FIX THE WORLD FOR US. THEN THE CHILDREN WONT NEED TO BE HIGH ON PAIN KILLERS TO BE HAPPY.

(I try to keep stuff like this to a minimum on my blog but at this point this is the only way I can safely put my opinion out into the world without being put into a mental hospital or yelled at.)