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gilbertscurls · 18 days

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Into it ➵ Matt Sturniolo

warnings: dry humping, soft!dom!reader, pet names (sweetheart, honey, my sweet boy)

synopsis: Matt is struggling with a persistent headache from hours of staring at his computer screen. Meanwhile, you find yourself unexpectedly captivated by how different—and attractive—Matt looks with his glasses on.

there's 400 of you already!! love you guys <3

Matt rubbed his temples as the dull ache behind his eyes intensified, the glow of the computer screen doing nothing to help. He’d been staring at it for hours, the spreadsheet blurring before him. Finally, with a sigh, he reached into his backpack and pulled out his blue light glasses.

“Man, I hate these things,” he muttered under his breath, sliding them on.

The glasses framed his face differently, the sleek black design making him look more focused, sharper. He blinked a few times, his headache already starting to ease, and went back to his work, not noticing the way you had suddenly gone very quiet.

You sat across from him, tapping at your laptop with a rhythm that had slowly died the moment Matt had put those glasses on. Your fingers hovered over the keyboard now, completely still, as you stole another glance his way.

He looked… Good. Really good.

You’d never paid much attention to Matt's glasses before, but for some reason, today was different. Maybe it was the way the lenses caught the light, making his blue eyes stand out, or how they seemed to give him this air of intelligence and quiet confidence. Whatever it was, you couldn’t stop staring.

“Baby?” Matt's voice cut through your thoughts, and you blinked, realizing you’d been caught.

“Huh?” you replied, your voice just a bit too high.

“I asked if you could double-check these numbers. You okay?” His brow furrowed in concern, but his gaze was calm behind those lenses.

“Oh! Yeah, totally.” You cleared your throat, tearing your eyes away from him and focusing on the screen. Your cheeks warmed, and you prayed he couldn’t see the blush creeping up your neck.

But as you tried to concentrate, you kept stealing glances, biting your lip as the thought kept circling in your head—How is it possible for someone to look so good in glasses?

“I, um… I think everything checks out,” you said, looking up at him with a small smile.

Matt reached out and took your hand, gently pulling you into his lap. He wanted to feel you close to him, to wrap his arms around you and hold you tight.

He leaned in and nuzzled his face into your neck, inhaling your scent and placing a soft kiss on your skin. His hands continued to rove over your legs and sides, moving in slow, soothing motions. His lips continued to move against your neck, leaving a trail of kisses along your skin as he inhaled your scent. The feeling of you in his lap, your weight on him, was so comforting and satisfying. You felt so light and delicate, and he was overcome with a protective feeling towards you.

Matt could feel you relaxing more and more into him, your body melting into his like you were made to fit together. He moved his arms around your waist, pulling you even closer to him. He could feel your soft curves pressing against him, and he couldn't help but feel a stirring of desire in his core.

He continued to nuzzle his face against your neck, his lips leaving feather-light kisses along your skin. His hands moved up your sides, gently tracing your shape and memorizing every contour of your body.

“How's your head, my sweet boy?” you asked softly.

He smiled at your endearment, feeling warmth spread through his chest. He loved when you called him your sweet boy, it always made him feel cared for and loved.

“My head is doing alright, honey,” he said, his voice soft. “I feel better with you in my arms.”

You giggled. “Glad to hear it.”

He chuckled at your giggle, feeling his heart skip a beat at the sound of your laughter. He pulled back so he could look you in the eyes, his hands still gently holding your sides.

“I don't think any medication could have worked as well as you,” he said, his tone teasing. “I should probably just make you my personal headache cure from now on.”

You looked at him with amusement before reaching up. He smiled as you fixed his glasses, your touch gentle and caring. He loved it when you did little things like that, it made him feel loved and cared for in such a simple way.

“You know, I wasn't sure about wearing these,” he said, gesturing to his glasses. “But seeing how much you seem to like them, I might have to wear them more often.”

“They make me feel… Some type of way,” you admitted sheepishly.

His smile widened as you admitted that his glasses made you feel a certain way. He was intrigued by the idea that something as simple as glasses could have an effect on you.

“Oh, really?” he teased. “And what kind of way do they make you feel, honey? Don't be shy now.”

“The 'I wanna jump you' kind of way.”

He let out a low, surprised moan when you said that, his body reacting in an instant. The thought of you being so turned on by something as simple as his glasses stirred something deep inside him.

“Is that so?” he asked, his voice a bit rougher than before. “And here I was thinking that these glasses made me look stupid.”

You laughed at his statement before shaking your head. “On the contrary,” you said, your eyes raking over him. “You look incredibly smart, and incredibly sexy in those glasses.”

You leaned in, your lips brushing against his ear as you continued in a low, sultry voice. “You look like a goddamn sex God sitting there with your legs spread, wearing your glasses and all. It's doing things to me, you have no idea.”

He felt a shiver run down his spine as your lips brushed against his ear and you whispered your words in that sultry tone. He felt a rush of desire and arousal at your words, and he felt himself harden even more in his pants.

“God, honey,” he groaned. “You can't say things like that to me when I'm already this worked up.”

You giggled playfully at his response, clearly enjoying the effect you were having on him. Your tongue poked out to wet your lips as you looked down at his lap, noticing the obvious bulge in his pants.

“Oh, I can tell,” you teased, your tone sultry. “I can see you're already hard. Does it turn you on that I think your glasses are sexy?”

He swallowed hard, his throat feeling dry. He was painfully hard in his pants, and your words were making him even more turned on. The combination of your sultry tone and the way you were looking at him was driving him wild.

“Yes,” he admitted, his voice low and rough. “Yes, it does. The thought of you wanting me like this, just because of a pair of glasses, is making me insane.”

You smirked, clearly pleased with his response. You leaned in closer, your lips right next to his ear.

“You have no idea, my sweet boy,” you murmured. “You have no idea how badly I want you right now, how much your glasses turn me on. I'm practically dripping at the thought of having you, all worked up and wearing your glasses.”

His body trembled at your words, his breath catching in his chest. Your words were like gasoline on an already raging fire, stoking the flames of his desire. The thought of you being so turned on by him, just because of his glasses, was driving him wild.

“Oh God,” he groaned, his voice strained. “Please...don't tease me like that, honey. I can't take much more of this.”

He felt you straddle him, your legs on each side of his hips. He instinctively reached to hold your hips, feeling the heat radiating off of you and the way your body pressed against his. You were sitting on his lap, and the feeling was driving him crazy.

“Jesus, sweetheart,” he breathed, his voice tight. “Are you trying to kill me?”

“Maybe I am,” you teased, your voice sultry. “Maybe I'm just trying to drive you insane.”

You began to roll your hips against his, grinding against him and feeling his hardness even through the layers of clothing. You smiled as you watched his face contort with pleasure at your movements.

“You feel so good,” you purred, your hands running up and down his chest. “And you look even better with those glasses on.”

He let out a low moan as you rolled your hips against him, the friction of your body rubbing against his sending waves of pleasure through his body. Feeling your wetness through your pants, grinding against him, was driving him crazy.

“God, honey,” he gasped, his voice strained. “You're going to kill me if you keep doing that.”

“And what a way to die,” you teased, your tongue poking out to wet your lips as you continued grinding against him. “You're hard and throbbing under me, and all because I like your glasses. How does it feel, my sweet boy?”

He felt his body responding to your movements, his hips instinctively bucking up to meet your grinding. He was so hard, it was almost painful, and the thought that you were enjoying this so much just because of his glasses was driving him wild.

“It feels amazing,” he groaned. “You have no idea how good you feel against me. I never knew my glasses could have this effect on you.”

“There's something about a smart, hot man wearing glasses that just does it for me,” you admitted, your voice dripping with desire. “You look so intelligent, so focused, and it's such a turn-on. And when you look at me over the rim of your glasses, it makes me want to devour you.”

He let out a guttural moan at your words, his grip on your hips tightening as he felt his desire for your grow even more. He loved seeing you so turned on and wanting him, and the thought that his glasses were part of the reason was incredible.

“You're killing me, honey,” he groaned. “You're so goddamn hot right now, and you know it. I don't know how much more I can take.”

You ground against him even harder, your movements becoming more insistent and desperate. You could feel how hard he was, how much he wanted you, and it only added to your own desire and need for him.

“Maybe I want to drive you over the edge,” you whispered, your voice sultry. “Maybe I want to see how much you can take before you break.”

“God, you're going to make me lose my mind,” he panted, his voice tight with desire. “If you keep talking and moving like that, I'm not going to be able to hold back much longer.”

You smiled, satisfied with his response. You could tell that he was close, that he was struggling to keep his control.

“Is that right?” you teased. “Are you going to give in to me, my sweet boy? Are you going to let go and let me take care of you?”

“God, yes,” he groaned, his voice hoarse with desire. “God, yes, I want you so badly. I need you to take care of me, honey. Just please, for the love of God, don't torture me any longer.”

You giggled at his desperation, loving the power you held over him at this moment. You could tell that he was close to breaking point, and you loved the effect you had on him.

“I love when you're so desperate for me like this,” you whispered, your mouth right next to his ear. “It's so hot to know that I have this much control over you.”

He shivered at your words, his body responding to your voice and your closeness. He felt like he was on the edge, ready to fall over any second. He was completely at your mercy, and he loved it.

“Please, honey,” he panted, his voice strained. “Please, I need you. I need you so badly. Don't make me wait any longer.”

You grinned, relishing in his pleading and desperation. You loved having him like this, so desperate and needy for you.

“Okay, my sweet boy,” you murmured, your voice low and sultry. “I'll give you what you want. Just let go, and let me take care of you.”

His breath caught in his chest as you rocked against him, his grip on your hips tightening even more. He could feel himself getting closer and closer to the edge, his body tensing up and his mind going blank from the pleasure.

“Oh God,” he gasped, his voice strained. “Oh God, honey, you're going to make me lose it. I'm so close, so close…”

You loved how desperate and on the edge he was, and you loved that you was the one doing this to him. You kept up your movements, riding him harder and faster, determined to push him over the edge. “Let go, my sweet boy,” you whispered, your mouth right next to his ear again. “Just let go, and give in to me. I want to see you lose control, just for me.”

Your words were the last straw, and he felt himself teetering on the edge.

“Oh God, honey, I'm- I'm-”

He couldn't finish his sentence, but you knew what was about to happen. His body tensed up even more, his breathing ragged and quick as he felt himself starting to let go, to give in to the pleasure that was overwhelming him.

You smiled as you felt his body tense up, knowing that he was about to lose control. You leaned in, your mouth right next to his ear, and whispered:

“That's it, my sweet boy. Let go for me. Let go and give in to me. I've got you, my good boy.”

He felt you press yourself even closer to him, your body moving frantically against his in a desperate search for your own release. He held onto you tighter, his hands gripping your hips as if his life depended on it.

“Oh God, honey,” he groaned. “You're so close, aren't you? You're so close, and it's because of me.”

You nodded, your breath coming out in ragged gasps as you felt yourself getting closer and closer to the edge.

“Yes, it's you, my sweet boy,” you panted. “It's all because of you. You're driving me wild, you're making me so hot, and it's all because of you, my smart, sexy man.”

His breathing was ragged and shallow as he felt you press your forehead against his, the frames of his glasses digging into your skin. But he was too far gone in the moment to care.

“You're so beautiful,” he mumbled, his voice strained. “So beautiful, and so hot, and I'm so close to losing it. I'm so close… So close…”

“I know,” you panted. “I can tell, my sweet boy. You're so close, but you're holding back. You're trying to be such a good boy for me, aren't you?”

He let out a low, guttural moan, his body tensing up even more as he felt himself getting even closer to the edge.

“I'm trying,” he groaned, his voice tight. “Oh God, I'm trying so hard. I don't want to lose it yet, I want to make you feel good first.”

You smiled, feeling a rush of affection for him even in this heated moment. You loved how much he was trying to make sure you were feeling good, how much he wanted to be a good boy for you.

“You're doing so good, my sweet boy,” you murmured, your mouth right next to his ear again. “You're doing so good, holding back for me. But it's okay, you can let go, my good boy. I want you to lose control, just for me.”

His body was trembling with the effort of holding back, but your words were starting to break him down.

“Oh God, honey,” he panted. “I don't know how much longer I can hold on. I'm so close, so close… Oh God, you feel so good, you look so hot, and I want to come for you so bad.”

You could tell that he was getting close to breaking point, that he was struggling to hold on any longer. But you loved seeing him like this, so desperate and needy for you.

“Then let go, my sweet boy,” you whispered, your voice low and sultry. “Just let go, and come for me. Let me see how good it feels to you, to lose control for me. You're my good boy, aren't you? My sweet, good boy?”

He let out a low, guttural moan as your words sent shivers down his spine. He was holding on by a thread, but your voice and your body against him were making it almost impossible to hang on any longer.

“Oh God, baby,” he panted, his voice strained. “I'm so close, I'm so close… Oh God, I can't hold on much longer. I want to come for you, I want to lose control for you, my sweet girl. I'm your good boy, I'm your good boy.”

He felt your breaths hitch as you teetered on the edge, and it only made him all the more desperate to make you feel good. He bucked up against you, trying to give you the friction he knew you needed.

“I want you to feel good, baby,” he panted, his voice strained. “I want you to come for me, my sweet girl. I want to see you lose control, just like I'm about to lose control for you. You're so beautiful, so hot, and you're all mine.”

You lost yourself in the sensations as he bucked up against you, and the combination of his body and his words was all you needed to push you over the edge.

“Oh God,” you gasped, your voice shaky. “Oh God, I'm cumming, I'm cumming… Oh God, my sweet boy, my good boy, my love, my everything… I'm coming…”

He felt you go over the edge, your words and your body sending him flying off the edge with you. His body contracted against yours, his grip on your hips tight as he rode out his release with you.

“Oh God, oh God, oh God… Oh God, you're so beautiful, you're so hot, you feel so good…”

You shivered through your release, your body trembling against his as you rode out your orgasm with him. When you finally came down, you collapsed against him, your forehead still pressed against his.

“That was…” you breathed, your voice rough and ragged. “Amazing.”

He wrapped his arms around you, holding you close against him as he tried to catch his breath. His body was still shaking from the intensity of his release, and he was having a hard time finding the words to express how amazing it had been.

“Yeah,” he panted, his voice low. “Yeah, it was… It was unlike anything I've ever felt before.”

He felt you giggle softly, and he realized that he could feel the wetness seeping through his pajamas. He felt a mixture of embarrassment and amusement, and he couldn't help but laugh a little as well.

“Yeah, I guess we made a bit of a mess, didn't we?” he said, his voice laced with amusement.

You pulled back a little and looked down between them, seeing the wet spot on his pajamas. You couldn't help but giggle again, a mischievous expression on your face.

“Looks like we did,” you said, your voice teasing. “Sorry about that, my sweet boy.”

He grinned, feeling a mix of amusement and affection at your teasing tone.

“Oh, don't apologize, honey,” he said, his voice playful. “I think I kinda like it, actually.”

tag list: @stuwniolo, @sturnobsessedwh0re, @matts-myloverboy, @imjusthereforthesturniolosmut, @lizzymacdonald06

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asbealthgn · 2 years

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Eddie is used to getting recognized in public, but it doesn’t mean he likes it.

And Gareth knows how much he doesn’t like it, so Eddie’s not really sure why his best friend has completely abandoned him like this. Well, maybe abandon is a little dramatic. He said he’d be right back, but that was half an hour ago, and there’s only so many times he can circle the park and dive into bushes anytime someone gets too close. Which is why Eddie left the park altogether and is now sitting at a bus station. No one would expect notorious Corroded Coffin frontman Eddie Munson to be at a bus station, right?

Except he’s not sure the hat and sunglasses and incongruous location are quite doing their job. A group of kids across the road have stopped and they’re all whispering amongst themselves as they look at him. Eddie really wishes he had something to conceal himself with, but his hand over his face would definitely look way too suspicious. He’s thinking he might just have to cut and run and take his chances back in the park bushes.

That is, until the most beautiful man he’s ever seen in his life sits in the seat next to him, unfurling a giant map that easily shields both of them. Eddie’s fucking savior.

“Hey, you wouldn’t happen to know how to get to Japantown, would you?” the guy asks.

As it happens, Eddie does know how to get to Japantown. He hasn’t actually ridden the bus in years, but he still remembers the route. “Yeah,” he says, pointing it out on the map. “You just get on line five headed east and ride it like nine or ten stops until you get to McAllister and Fillmore. From there you just have to walk a few blocks to get into the area.”

The guy looks at him with big eyes, brown and a little droopy. “McAllister and Fillmore,” he repeats, like he’s trying to memorize it. He has pretty pink lips, glistening a little like he’s wearing lipgloss.

Fuck, he’s adorable. And looks a bit prone to getting lost. And Eddie’s still kind of mad at Gareth for leaving him high and dry out here. So as the bus pulls up to the stop, Eddie figures what the hell?

“I’m actually headed that way,” Eddie says, standing. “I can show you.”

The guy’s whole face brightens and fuck, he really is gorgeous. “You don’t mind?”

“Not at all, big boy.”

The bus is blessedly empty other than one shriveled up lady sitting towards the front with her groceries and a teenager in the middle with giant headphones and their nose in a book. Eddie heads to the back with the guy, who now has a faint blush dusting his nose and cheeks.

“I’m Steve, by the way,” he says as he sits in the seat next to Eddie. “What’s your name?”

So that confirms that Steve doesn’t know who he is. It didn’t seem like he did from how he was reacting, but it’s a bit of relief to know for sure. “Eddie,” he says, bumping his shoulder into Steve’s. “Nice to meet you.”

Steve gives him a smile that’s about as radiant as the sun as he nudges Eddie’s shoulder back. “You too.”

“So what do you have going on in Japantown?” Eddie asks.

“I’m headed to a baby shower for some friends who live near there,” he says, “Well, it’s not a real baby shower.”

“No?”

“‘Cause it’s not a real baby. That is, it’s not a human baby.”

Eddie lifts his eyebrows. “I think you lost me.”

Steve twists in his seat and starts gesturing with his hands. “Well, it all started when they found out that one of their cats wasn’t actually spayed and had gotten knocked up by a stray,” he says, “And Robin was like, ‘Hey, more cats, that’s a good thing,’ and Nancy was like, ‘No, our neighbors already think we’re crazy cat ladies.’”

“Uh huh.”

“So they compromised and decided they would keep one kitten and give the rest away,” Steve says, “So it’s less of a come give us presents for our baby shower and more of a please take our babies away shower. You know?”

“Oh yeah, one of those,” Eddie says, and Steve laughs.

“Hey, are you in the market for a kitten?” he asks. “Cause if you are, I totally know where you can get one.”

It’s Eddie’s turn to laugh. “Honestly?” he says, “I’ve got nothing else going on. Why the hell not?”

Steve gives him another one of those radiant smiles and Eddie can’t help but hope he gets more than a kitten by the end of this.

#robin: what is eddie munson doing in our living room?#steve: you guys already know my new friend eddie?#i honestly don't really know what this is #i woke up from a nap and this was just in my brain #so do with it what you will #steddie #steve x eddie #steve harrington #eddie munson #stranger things #ficlet

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lilirari · 9 months

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🧋 everyone thinks pedri should stop pining for you because you 'don't give a f*ck' about him but they don't know what your actual relationship with the footballer is.

💌 pedri gonzález x fem! joao felix's bff! reader (social media au)

🌟 cw : pedri being a total simp, cheesy pick-up lines, translated spanish & portuguese sentences, timelines don't matter

💭 author's note : this is for my beloved pookie @leclercloml ! ilysm <3 idk if the ending parts make sense but please just bear with it 😞

instagram 🎥

yourinstagram

📍 new york city, usa

liked by pedri, joaofelix79, jennaortega and 13,193,299 others

yourinstagram the wind was a paid actor

view all 17,929 comments

pedri 😍😍😍

pedri eres la chica más hermosa que he visto en mi vida.

pedri i ought to complain to spotify for you not being named this week's hottest single

-> spotify complaint received 😉

-> user59 oh spotify's definitely on the pedri x y/n agenda

pedri do you happen to have a band-aid ? i just scrapped my knees falling for you

-> yourinstagram deserved fall down again

-> user80 HELPDHSHDHSHDH WHY IS SHE LIKE THIS

-> user44 poor pedri but this is kind of funny 😭

jennaortega my favourite girl (⁠ ⁠˘⁠ ⁠³⁠˘⁠)

mikkykiemeney 🫶🫶🫶

saraguendogan gorgeous !!!

user45 the way two of the most popular barça wags are in her comments.. joão really must've introduced her to everyone in barça by now 😭

joaofelix79 minha linda melhor amiga 🥰

-> yourinstagram te amo joao 🫶

user33 babe wake up pedrizz gonzález is in the comments of y/n's post again

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yourinstagram

📍 ibiza

liked by pedri, joaofelix79, ferrantorres and 15,364,748 others

yourinstagram i love pink <3

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pedri and i love you 🥰😘

-> yourinstagram ew

pedri ¿dónde has estado toda mi vida? 😍

pedri if beauty was a crime, you would've been sentenced for life in prison

-> user11 omg this is actually so good y/n please accept his love 😞

emmamyers 🩷🩷🩷

ferrantorres ❤️

liked by yourinstagram

joaofelix79 my prettiest girl 🫶

-> yourinstagram joao best boy !!!

user34 pedri should just stop trying to win y/n's heart man she clearly has no interest in him he's just wasting his time..

user50 i want a friendship like y/n and joão's 🥹

user96 is something going on between y/n and ferran ?? 🤔

user23 wait i'm a new barça fan and i came from x after seeing a post about pedri commenting on this girl's post.. who is she exactly ?

-> user22 she's y/n l/n, an upcoming model and also the bff of joão félix ! ^^

-> user23 ooh she's so pretty i get why pedri wants her lol

user82 huh ?? wasn't y/n in new york like literally yesterday ? how is she already in ibiza 😭

-> user25 queen's working so hard fr 😞

user75 pedrito i know you'll get the girl of your dreams someday i'm rooting for you !!!

liked by pedri

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yourinstagram

📍 lisbon, portugal

liked by pedri, joaofelix79, frenkiedejong and 20,182,838 others

tagged mikkykiemeney, saraguendogan, annalewandowska, taia_belloli, joaofelix79

yourinstagram on a trip with my girls (there's an imposter among us)

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pedri quisiera ser joyero para poder apreciar un diamante como tú todos los días 🤍

-> yourinstagram bro please stop before i block you 🧍‍♀️

-> user77 pedri i think you should listen to her y/n can be absolutely ruthless 😭

pedri ok but why did joão get invited and i didn't ?

-> yourinstagram bc you're not one of the girls ???

-> pedri and joão is ??

-> yourinstagram yeah !!! ☺️

-> joaofelix79 i was forced to tag along against my own will, hermano 😞

mikkykiemeney had so much fun with you, love ! 🫶

annalewandowska thanks for inviting me, angel ❤️

joaofelix79 who's the best tour guide & chauffeur ??

-> yourinstagram you are !! 🥰🥰 thanks for making this trip fun and memorable, amor 🫶

-> joaofelix79 yeah yeah i accept thanks only in cash and credit

saraguendogan 💋💋

taia_belloli mi novia 🥰

user23 AHHH Y/N WITH THE BARÇA WAGS

user81 OMG THOSE POOL PICTURES OF Y/N AND SARA ARE SO PRETTY

user43 wait does this mean y/n is a barça wag ?

-> user19 i don't think so but i also won't be surprised if she's dating one of the guys

-> user01 nah, i think she just got really close with the wags because of félix

user99 MOTHER IS MOTHERING !!!

user45 MY WIVES 💅

user55 can pedri please just give up on pursuing y/n.. she's CLEARLY not interested in you bro

-> pedri 🙉

-> user39 shut up man he clearly doesn't give a fuck about what people like you are saying

user26 no bc are we sure joão and y/n are not dating ?

-> user34 yep pretty sure

-> user84 they sure are sus for two best friends who call each other 'amor' and say 'ily' to e/o all the time

-> user07 i'm sure it's just in a platonic way, man

-> user02 what ? can't two people of the opposite gender say ily and still be only friends ? this is just a healthy friendship bro

user43 y/n please notice pedri and treat him properly challenge 😞🙏

user46 AHHH i hope joão showed them all the best places in lisbon ❤️🇵🇹

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yourinstagram

📍 paris, france

🎼 my love mine all mine : mitski

liked by joaofelix79, oliviarodrigo, gigihadid and 33,127,289 others

yourinstagram bts for the photoshoot of a new magazine cover for vogue ! oh, and i got some flowers today ;) 💐

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joaofelix79 nice flowers

joaofelix79 who's that man though 👀

-> yourinstagram idk you tell me 🫣

jennaortega already omw to pre-order 1000 copies of the magazine

-> yourinstagram please i love you 😭🫶

gigihadid perfection 🫶

-> yourinstagram love u gigi

heidiklum 🤍🖤

konichan7 🥰

adrianalima xoxo 💋

_ferminlopez 🤭

-> user77 ariana what are you doing here

user34 some of the biggest names in the modelling industry are here in the comments... y/n really has come so far i'm so proud of you girl 🥹

user27 here for y/n's famous era !!!

user97 our prettiest princess !!! we love you y/n 💌

user36 SIS IS THAT A MAN I SEE BEHIND YOU 😧

user05 don't be shy y/n show us a picture of the man in the second slide

user72 the song... the picture... the flowers... HAVE WE LOST Y/N TO A MAN ???

user55 um guys where's pedri ?

-> user78 EXACTLY WHAT I WAS THINKING

-> user40 WHERE'S OUR GOLDEN BOY AND HIS SHITTY PICK-UP LINES

user95 pedri's @ is not there in the likes...

user33 no cringey pick-up line comments from pedri and he's not in the likes either.. what's happening..

user67 i'm guessing that man must be her bf ??

user15 well ig at least we all know that the man with her is not pedri since he's nowhere to be found 🤷‍♀️

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yourinstagram

📍 barcelona, spain

liked by pedri, joaofelix79, louispartridge_ and 40,932,389 others

yourinstagram hi barcelona

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joaofelix79 what are you doing here

-> yourinstagram came to visit you bestie 🥰🥰🥰 i missed you sooooo much

-> joaofelix79 what a liar 🙄

oliviarodrigo love u girlie

alejandrobalde 🤍

liked by yourinstagram

taia_belloli you are glowing, sis !!!

jennierubyjane pretty in white ♡

alexiaputellas 💓💘

user13 my sunshine !!! 💛☀️

user04 what's balde doing here 😧

user82 BALDE ??? HELLO ????

user75 pedri in the likes but still no comment...

user16 what is happening with y/n and the barça boys

user30 damn i kinda miss pedri's comments 😭

user27 has pedri finally stopped trying to rizz y/n up ??

-> user08 i hope so.. he doesn't deserve her she seems so annoying

-> user89 how exactly is she annoying ??

-> user08 she's always dismissing/ignoring his comments and being mean to him what a bitch

-> user89 i don't think she's actually being mean though.. and if he isn't bothered by the way she acts then why are you ?

-> user75 please stop calling y/n names and trying to make her a villain she's an absolute angel

liked by pedri, joaofelix79, jennaortega and others

user66 the way we see different barça players comment on her post everyday 🧍‍♀️ guess today's man of the day is balde

user05 THAT DRESS IS GORG SIS

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yourinstagram 10 minutes ago | pedri 2 minutes ago

seen by joaofelix79, pablogavi, frenkiedejong and 17,929,199 others

y/n's dms 🏷️

☆ joaofelix79 replied to your story !

husband ??? 😰😱

yourinstagram

yuh

☆ user56 replied to your story !

HUSBAND ???? QUEEN WHO ???

☆ user69 replied to your story !

please tell me that's just a beyonce reference and you don't actually have a husband.. 🥹

twitter 🫖

imessage 💬

mi esposa 💌

i think it's time

mi esposo ❤️‍🩹

wait really ? are you sure about this ?

mi esposa 💌

yeah 100% sure i'm ready

mi esposo ❤️‍🩹

alright then

mi esposa 💌

it's been a good run, hasn't it ?

mi esposo ❤️‍🩹

it sure has...

3 years ain't that bad

mi esposa 💌

frfr !!

we're a bit too good at this 🤭

mi esposo ❤️‍🩹

i second that

mi esposa 💌

i'll drop a head's up now

see you on the other side 🫡

mi esposo ❤️‍🩹

let's go give the world a shock, mi amor 🫶

twitter 🫖

instagram 🎥

yourinstagram

📍 tenerife, canary islands

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tagged pedri

yourinstagram i'm guessing this wasn't the type of news y'all were expecting, huh ? jokes on all of you bc pedrito and i have actually been together for three years now. we were just a bit too good at hiding our relationship 🤭 anyways happy three years together, mi amor, and also happy 6 months of our marriage ! te amare por siempre, my golden boy 🤍

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pedri my gorgeous girl

pedri te amo, mi vida 🫶

liked by yourinstagram

pedri te voy a denunciar a la policía por robarme el corazón

-> yourinstagram oh no ! i can't be behind bars now — i've got my whole life ahead of me ! 😰

joaofelix79 ahh finally !!! keeping your relationship a secret was probably the hardest thing i ever had to do in my entire life

-> yourinstagram you're the absolute best joão thank you 🫶

-> joaofelix79 as i've said before, i accept thanks in only cash and credit

-> yourinstagram sending you some money rn

-> joaofelix79 😁😁😁

jennaortega my favourite couple !!!

-> yourinstagram my maid of honour 🥹🫶

pablogavi ❤️

gigihadid still in awe over this look of yours you really are the prettiest bride

mikkykiemeney 😍😍😍

annalewandowska my babies 🥹🥹

fcbarcelona the best couple 🫶

ferrantorres ❤‍🔥

user81 .... girl what

user90 WHAT IN THE ACTUAL FUVK

user12 three years... THREE YEARS ?????

user04 not only have you been together for three years but URE FRICKING MARRIED ????

user24 HOW TF DID NO ONE KNOW ABOUT THEIR RELATIONSHIP

user46 HUHHHHHHHHHHH 😧😧😧😧😧😧

user57 we are all fvcking clowns

user68 another day of blaugrana being an entire circus

user38 THREE YEARS ???? but félix joined barça only this year.. huh how did you guys meet i'm confused

-> yourinstagram pedri and i have actually known each other for a long time now 😭 most of you may just know me as joão's bff but only some people know that i'm friends with pedri's brother hehe so we got to know each other through fernando :)

user72 HOW DID YOU GUYS HID YOUR RELATIONSHIP FROM US FOR THREE HECKING YEARS ? HOW IS THIS POSSIBLE ?????

user01 HOW DID THE MEDIA AND PAPARAZZI NOT CATCH YOU WHAT

user07 goodness idek how to react to this

user29 wait so you were just pretending to hate pedri in your previous posts... but why ?

-> yourinstagram oh it was just a bet we made when joão joined barça this year. most of you knew me only when joão joined barça and pedri and i had already been working on our marriage plans by then. we've hid the facts about our relationship for three years now but marriage is a huge thing and there was no way we could hide our wedding for years so we just wanted to see how long it would take for the paparazzi to catch up on the news lol. to help hide our marriage a little longer, we just pulled an unrequited love act on my instagram posts and i pretended to ignore him irl too for fun 🤭

-> user57 this is absolutely insane... you guys are geniuses

-> user80 OKAY BUT WHO WON THE BET THOUGH ???

-> yourinstagram technically no one since we both thought the news wouldn't get out until next year but we're spending our honeymoon in barcelona rn and we just got a bit too bold in public and sadly got caught 😞

yourinstagram ok correction you guys we never really hid our rs tbh i guess you guys just never knew me or like paid much attention to things so it just got really easy to date him without having to deal with the media 🤷‍♀️

-> user03 now that i think about it... i feel like you've appeared in a few of the gonzález family photos, y/n 🤔

-> yourinstagram yes i have ! but if i remember correctly, most people just thought i was fernando's gf or sumn 😭

-> user99 omg we were so fucking blind 🧍‍♀️

-> user67 well we just never expected pedri to have enough rizz to pull a beauty queen like you ig

-> pedri HEY

-> yourinstagram LMAO FOULLLLLL

user44 i love how y/n just spilled the whole tea to us 🥹 she's so iconic

user12 GOD I LOVE Y/N SO MUCH FOR THIS LITTLE STORYTIME UNDER THE COMMENTS

user06 THEY'RE SO FUCKING ADORABLE I LOVE YNPEDRI

user55 SUCH A BEAUTIFUL WEDDING DRESS 🤍

user21 what is with joão and money though LMAO

-> joaofelix79 if barça doesn't have enough money to buy me, then i'll provide them the money instead

-> user02 I'M IN TEARS THIS IS SO ICONIC OF YOU JOÃO

-> user74 LMFAO WHAT A LEGEND

user23 PEDRI IN THAT FOURTH SLIDE DAYUMMMM

user16 i hate you both so much for lying to us for so long but also congratulations on getting married !!! 🥹

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pedri

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tagged yourinstagram

pedri feliz aniversario, mi vida 🤍

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twitter 🫖

♡ translations of pedri's pick-up lines !

“eres la chica más hermosa que he visto en mi vida.”

: you are the most beautiful girl i have ever seen in my life.

“¿dónde has estado toda mi vida?”

: where have you been all my life ?

“quisiera ser joyero para poder apreciar un diamante como tú todos los días.”

: i would like to be a jeweler so i can appreciate a diamond like you every day.

“te voy a denunciar a la policía por robarme el corazón.”

: i will report you to the police for stealing my heart.

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lxvvie · 10 months

Note

ghost hcs pls!!! general, or sfw

You know the three S's of your regular degular morning routine? Yeah, add a fourth S for Simon. For smoking that is.

Isn't really one to splurge on himself. For the most part, his place has the basic necessities, but if it doesn't have anything else, it has good fuckin' bedding, down pillows and all. Simon would much rather have a sleepless night in comfort than not.

He also likes to sleep in total darkness.

Is that one person who keeps a stash of sweets nearby. Is also that one person who looks as if he's pulling them out of thin air. Simon likes to say that they "help keep him alert" but that's bullshit, really. He just has a raging sweet tooth.

The naming conventions in his contacts are based off of personal observations, something memorable they've done, etc. It may be weird but it works for him. For instance, Price is Tea and Grumpets, Soap is Can't Flirt For Shit, and Gaz is Giggles While Pissed.

Calls any and everyone 'sweetheart' or 'kid' like an old fucking man.

His facial hair grows too fast for his liking.

Simon didn't expect to get so fuckin' big as an adult but here we are and he likes it just fine.

When he's in the comfort of his own abode while off duty, Simon usually keeps a cigarette tucked behind his ear.

Soap bought him a weighted blanket so he, too, can join the Soapurrito™ and become... the Ghosturrito™. Simon has yet to use it. May or may not have forgotten he had it at one point, too.

Has a tendency to start and not finish his knitting. As such, he has a shit ton of unfinished projects lying around his place.

If he isn't doing anything job-related, Simon can be found working on his knitting projects sometimes. Calls them his Knit and Smoke sessions. Usually has some music playing as background noise, too.

Said music would have you think he's constantly going through shit when he's... he's not.

Has a neighbor who is a huge football fan but his team is shit apparently. The walls are thin enough to hear him. Simon always gets a chuckle out of hearing him talk shit and complain every time they lose. Reminds him of Johnny.

#cw: smoking #call of duty #ghost cod #call of duty modern warfare #call of duty modern warfare 2 #call of duty modern warfare 3 #ghost mw2 #simon ghost riley #task force 141 #cod mwii #cod mw3 #knitting simon au

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writingsfromhome · 1 year

Text

Impossibly Real

A/N: cute little story about being in a rough dating world and having a nice neighbour friend.

Part 2

———————————————————

I memorize the face on my phone whilst standing in the middle of my building lobby. I study it as if I hadn’t been staring at his pictures since we both swiped right a couple weeks ago.

“Hot date?” A voice calls out. I look up to the source—one of my neighbours with takeaway in one hand and a case of beer in the other. The smell of his dinner makes my stomach rumble—I’d skipped dinner myself for this 8pm date.

“A very hot date,” I respond. Harry was one of the first people I’d interacted with when I moved to this complex a year and a half ago. He’d helped me move my boxed mattress in and I thanked him with a lukewarm beer. Ever since, we’d pick up on conversation every time we saw each other.

Most of those times were when we’d both be rushing out to work in the morning. Sometimes he’d walk to the tube with me, both of us going in opposite directions. Other times his girlfriend would pick him up.

“Let’s see,” he switches his beer to the other hand and holds his hand out.

I pretend to open the app and look for my date’s profile as if it hadn’t been open for the last three hours. He makes a sound of approval when I pass it over.

“Right?” I grin as he scans the profile.

I wasn’t always lucky in love. When Harry first met me I was fresh out of a 3 year relationship, and the only things to follow were bad dates and lonely nights.

“Likes pizza?” Harry says like he’d just caught sight of the guy’s private pictures.

“Yeah? So what?” I feel my defences go up. “Who doesn’t?”

“Yeah but that’s so…basic.” He hands the phone back. “That’s like saying ‘Drinks tea’ or ‘breathes air’.”

“No it’s not!” I wanted this to be a good one so badly, I wouldn’t hear any of Harry’s slander. “It’s relatable, and shows he’s down to earth.”

Harry groans. “Remind me what you do for work?”

I squint at him, unsure where he was going with his. “Analyst.”

“Ah,” he switches his beer back to his other hand and it snaps me out of the moment. I always lost track of time talking to Harry and this couldn’t be one of those times. I had somewhere to be!

“Ah what?” I glance at the door.

“As an analyst you’re used to reading into things-“

“Piss off!” I shut him down. “I’m leaving now.”

“I’m joking!” Harry calls out. “I’m sure he’s a great guy.”

I don’t respond to him as I walk away but he calls out my name.

“You look great, it’ll be a good date.”

“Fingers crossed,” I echo. “Enjoy your night.”

I find a taxi quickly and sit on my hands the whole way there so I don’t pick at my nails. There was no such thing as out of my league, I remind myself. He was just going to be a guy. A good looking guy.

***

“I’m getting a bit tipsy,” Dave admits. It was half past 9 and we’d had 5 drinks total, one of those being a nervous shot when he hadn’t showed up in the first ten minutes.

“We should get something to eat!” I suggest.

He grimaces. “It’s a bit overpriced in here.”

Oh. He was cheap.

That was rude. I snap out of my darkening thoughts. I couldn’t help it: not only was Dave late, he looked 5 years older than his pictures, which wasn’t a bad thing, but he was also 5 inches shorter than his profile stated.

It was awkward when he came in and I got up to hug him. I’d worn my 3 inch heels expecting to still come to his chest but we’d met at eye level instead. I didn’t want to make it awkward so I had sat down quickly. I regretted wearing these heels. They were chaffing against my feet even whilst sitting.

And the whole evening had been stiff conversation, like rubbing sandpaper against itself. It had ended in a dull evening. He was cute. That was all he had going for him.

“There’s a really good pizza place around here!” I say casually, like I hadn’t Googled the vicinity for an hour after we’d made plans. “I heard it was rated top 10 in the city.

His grimace comes back, it made him more unattractive the more he did it.

“I can go for some chips. There’s probably one down the road, you alright for a walk?”

“Great!” Maybe some fresh air and a change of scenery could spice the night up.

He pays the bill—maybe he wasn’t so cheap, I think. That is until we get to the chips shop and he hangs back for me to order for us. And pay.

I can already imagine retelling this date to my girl friends. They were all engaged or married so my dating stories were always amusing content for our hangouts.

Crossing from 20 to 30 made the stories more tragic than amusing, but I lived to laugh and that’s what I usually did after getting over bad dates like this one.

“It’s a nice night,” Dave says when we get our chips. He douses his in ketchup like a toddler would. Gah!

“It is…”

“Let’s take these outside.”

I’d rather not, with my heels digging into the backs of my feet and the blisters chafing against the fake leather. But I agree.

“So what’s with the pink?” He asks randomly.

“What?” I say over a mouthful of chip. I didn’t care how disgusting I was at this point. He’d done the bill-for-a-bill thing without asking and I’d lost any hope I had for the evening. I may as well be gross.

“The pink, you’ve got it at the bottoms of your hair and your earrings, your lips and your skirt and your heels-“

“I like pink.”

“That’s obvious,” he says dryly. “Is there a story behind it or something? Usually only schoolgirls wear their favourite colour that much.”

And usually only younger boys have fries with they ketchup rather ketchup with their fries, I want to say. But I keep my mouth shut.

“I think it’s overrated that getting older means getting all serious and boring. Pink’s my favourite colour and the world can know it. Be brighter for knowing it too.”

I keep my tone light yet Dave seems to takes my personal philosophy as a direct attack.

“But it’s a bit juvenile isn’t it? You don’t have to be boring just because you’re an adult but no one’s going to take you much seriously all dressed in pink. It’s a bit childish.”

“Not childish enough for you to want to go on a date with me,” I say. My pink hair was on display in my profile as well as many pink outfits throughout my linked Instagram. I know he’d seen it.

“That’s not what I’m talking about, not like that.” He backtracks. His face turns my favourite colour, even in the dark.

“When grown men are obsessed with Star Wars or Lord of the Rings or whatever, nobody bats an eye. They show up with fictional characters on their shirt and tattooed on their arms and it’s all dandy. But you think the world’s going to take me less seriously because I wear a lot of pink?”

“Okay I think there’s been a misunderstanding here.” Dave backs down like I knew he would. I’d known too many boys like him, who charged up when they thought they had an ounce of intellect over me. Reciprocate with even an ounce of assertive energy and they back down like a well-trained dog.

This night was tragic. My hopes up for nothing. And my feet were blistered for no damn reason.

“I think we’ve understood each other just fine.” I wipe my hands on a napkin and toss the rest of my chips away, ignoring the look Dave gives me. “It was a night, I’m going to head home now.”

“Look I-“

“Goodnight.” I walk away. I had no idea what direction but as long as I can end the night with the hope-zapper Dave.

***

On the lift up to my flat I look at myself in the mirror. Dead eyes, flushed and puffy face from the alcohol, and my hair was voluminous from the windy night air. I couldn’t wait to get to my flat and take my stupid heels off. They were so painful they’d now actually gone numb.

My phone rings as I get to my door. Dave. The nerve of that guy!

I put it on silent and fish out my keys but my phone buzzes a second time and I drop them.

“Fuck!” I say just as the door behind me opens.

“Woah!” Harry steps back into his flat after nearly tripping over my crouched figure.

“Ugh sorry,” I stand back up, keys looped around my finger.

“You’re back early.” Harry slowly eyes me from top to bottom. It makes my stomach feel like a washing machine on high. “Nice night with pizza guy?”

“Pizza guy was just like the others.”

I lean against my door and ignore my phone that’s now gone off for the third time in my purse.

“Fair enough. He did say he likes pizza.”

“Don’t make fun of me,” I whine. “I just wasted £30 on shite company.”

“Can I offer you a beer or have you had too many?”

I look down at my watch. It was half past 10, and I had work tomorrow but life was short and I was miserable so I follow Harry in.

“I’ll just toss this later.”

It’s only then I realize Harry had a trash bag in his hands and he was in his boxers and a robe. He rests the bag near his door and motions to the fridge as he walks down his hall. “Grab me one too?”

I’d been in Harry’s flat a few time, once when I baked too many sugar cookies for Christmas and he invited me in to eat with him. Another time when he was having a birthday party. I had thought it was cute his friends had done that for him old school. The last time was when my wifi stopped working one weekend and I had to ask him to use his. That was a nice day, both of us were going through busy season and had worked side by side on our laptops until Harry announced we were losers and should stop working to get dinner and watch a movie. That was one of my favourite days living in this complex so far.

I’m still standing in his kitchen when he comes out with sweatpants.

“Why are you still standing there?”

I look down at my shoes and so does he.

“Don’t you want to take those off?” Harry lifts one brow, confused.

“I’m scared.” I say. I didn’t know what I’d find. I felt like I was standing in a pool of blood.

“Why?” Harry was lucky he didn’t know the fear of taking off awful shoes after a long day of breaking them in. Men were lucky that way.

I shift my heel away from the back of the shoe and pain shoots up. It sounds sticky. I whimper. “Can you get me a chair?”

“What did you wear?” Harry’s staring at them with a mixture of fear and confusion. He carries one of his dining chairs to me. “Those are like, torture heels.”

“Tonight was torture.” I sit down and cross my foot over my knee. I take a deep breath. Harry hovers above me not able to look away. “Here goes nothing.”

I pry the shoe away and nearly cry.

“Oh my god!” Harry shouts. “Yo-you’re bleeding! What the f-“

“Oh my god,” I was dripping onto his floor. “Can I get-“

“Tissue!” Harry’s already throwing me his roll but I knock it away.

“I need help. Getting. To the bathroom.”

“Right right.” Harry kicks my shoe away and leans down so I can wrap my arm around his shoulder. I feel like an injured football player but so much more pathetic as I limp to his bathroom.

He sets me down on his toilet seat and blasts the tub with water.

“Sorry,” I limp to the edge of his bathtub and swing myself so that my feet dangle in. “I didn’t mean to intrude on your night.”

“I’m glad you did,” Harry’s voice still carries a hint of shock. “What is wrong with you? That’s diabolical you wearing shoes like that! What’s wrong with trainers? Or sandals? Don’t girls like strap sandals?”

“It just comes with being a woman okay?” I couldn’t answer all his questions. “I still need to take off the other one.”

I was more scared for my right foot than my left.

“Just…deal with that.”

Harry’s tub is filling with water and it stings everywhere it touches my foot. But especially my heel and all of my toes. I switch the knob to cold.

“Okay,” I take a deep breath. “The other fucking shoe.”

I can feel Harry peering over my shoulder. This one feels glued on and I squeal as I comes off. My foot looked like a bruised and crusted mess.

“Holy sh-“ Harry whispers. I dunk it fast in the running water and nearly topple backwards but Harry catches me with his knee and then stays there so I have somewhere to lean. It was nice.

“Bloody hell,” I swear as my feet sting and paint the water pink. “Genuinely so sorry about this.”

“Don’t be.” Harry shakes his head. “But please toss those shoes in the bin and never wear something like that again.”

“That’s impossible.”

“It’s not. It’s very possible.”

“I love heels! I just need to break these in.”

“They’re breaking you love.”

I feel him stiffen behind me which makes me suddenly self-conscious. I didn’t really read into his words, love was just a term of affection used around my friends. But apparently it wasn’t something Harry used lightly.

“They are. These ones are going in the bin, DNA and all.” I try to continue casually. This was so weird. Weirder than it needed to be given Harry and I were mates at most; I’d met his girlfriend, I didn’t think of him anything more than a neighbourhood friend. We certainly hadn’t hung out outside our flats before.

“Maybe burn them to be sure,” Harry finally responds. His voice is a bit rougher than before. “Don’t want to get accidentally framed with the free DNA.”

“I’m pretty sure I’d be too obvious a murderer to commit anything stealthily. They’d identify the pink-haired giant walking away.”

“You’re not a giant. You’re not even 6 feet.”

“I’m nearly 5’9 which is tall enough for a woman.”

“I don’t think so.” Harry brushes my hair behind my shoulder and a shiver runs up my spine. Maybe I should turn the icy water off. “Plus I like the pink. Makes you more interesting to look at.”

“So I’m not interesting to look at regularly?” I tease. I look up at him and the back of my head hits his thigh.

I see his adam’s apple bob and I suddenly feel vulnerable sitting here like this. I lean forward so my feet are steadied against the tub which is agonizing for my bloody feet but at least I wasn’t leaning against him.

“I said more interesting.”

The room grows quiet and I try not to read into it. Harry thought I was interesting to look at. Okay.

I turn the tap off and the silence in the room becomes unbearable.

“Have you got any plasters?” I turn inch by inch so I don’t slip on the lip of the tub or need more help from Harry. The energy in here was weird and him touching me was going to make it weirder.

“Yeah,” he’s eager to leave only to come back laughing. “They’re actually here. I…”

He opens a drawer and pulls a box out along with a tiny vial.

I take it from him, some sort of ointment oil. Why not.

“Motherf-“ I bite my lip as the ointment stings my cuts. “Why wouldn’t you warn me!”

Harry laughs again and it eases the tension a little. “I thought you knew it would burn!”

“I don’t treat cuts often jeez!”

“Sorry! That friend—you met him at my party, black curly hair, the one who does custom stuff?”

“Oh yeah I remember.”

“I helped him out one summer. I had to hand cut all these signs using one of those exacto blades? Cut my hands up so many times I had to buy something for them after one of them got infected.”

I wrinkle my nose at the idea of an infected cut and douse my other foot in the oil, swearing as I take the pain.

“I have a roll and cotton if you want to bandage your foot?” Harry suggests. “I don’t know if regular plasters cut it.”

“That’s so dramatic,” I usually stuck a couple plasters on and got on with it. But this was also the worst I’d ever had with breaking shoes in.

“Let me-“

“No!” I push Harry’s shoulder away as he leans down with the roll of bandage he’d procured. “Harry do not touch my foot!”

“I’ve dressed grosser,” he holds my heel gently and I try to yank it away again without falling into the tub but it’s impossible. I settle for pushing him away.

“Harry please! I’ve intruded enough stop touching my disgusting foot!”

“I’ve seen you wash it. It’s not disgusting, just bloody. Now stop squirming about!”

“Why are you…” I trail away because he wasn’t listening. He dabs my foot with a cotton pad and then begins the process of bandaging my heel and then my toe. I try not to squirm at how embarrassing this was.

Harry’s gentle and attentive as he moves on to the other foot which should make me feel okay but only adds to the humiliation. We were so not close enough to do this—I don’t even know if I’d do the same for him.

Another part of me knows I would. Despite knowing him in passing, plus a few solid occasions, I could tell Harry was one of the good guys. He was always chivalrous around the building, friendly in any interaction I’d seen with him, loved enough to be thrown a surprise birthday party, and caring enough to always ask about how I was doing. And to do this.

When he glances up I don’t expect it. Our gazes clash and the weird energy from before creeps in again.

“Sorted,” he lets my foot down gently.

“Harry I owe you like…a massive dinner, and drinks are on me forever forward.”

“That’s not necessary,” he chuckles as he puts his little first aid kit back. “Just don’t wear heels like that again please. It’s not worth it.”

“They’re so pretty though,” I sigh. They’re now discarded on the tiled floor, the insides bloody.

“Let’s get you that beer,” he holds a hand out.

“I can’t. I’ve kept you late and you probably-“

“One beer.”

“I don’t want to intrude-“

“Just one,” his tone is gentle but he’s not taking no for an answer.

“Fine!” I admit defeat. He helps me up and together I limp to his couch.

We sit in silence for a bit while we drink. I don’t know what he’s thinking about, but the events of the evening play in my head.

“He actually insulted me.” I blurt. Before he can ask questions I explain. “Firstly he was late, then he was droning on and on about shit I don’t even remember anymore. Then he was cheap about food, but because he paid for drinks he got me to pay for chips. Then he said I wear too much pink and nobody would take me seriously as an adult. That it was childish.”

“Really?” Harry leans forward from his end of the couch. “He said all that?”

“Yeah! I said men are allowed to wear their Star Wars shirts and Lord of the Rings bullshite. And when a woman wears more than one article of pink she’s childish?”

“What a prick.”

“I know!”

“You’re too good for someone like that.”

“Thank you,” I sit back, seen and validated.

“The pink makes you cool, stand out in a crowd. He’s just blind to look at you and think that. Or he’s just intimidated.”

“Oh yeah he lied about his height! So I stood there in those stupid pink heels taller than him.”

“That must have got him,” Harry grins. “I actually love that story.”

His words warm me.

“You’re so nice Harry,” I tell him. “Honestly you’re like a gem of a guy.”

“I’m not that nice-“

“Don’t tell me you’re a bad boy or something because you’re a solid good guy. Rare. Never change.”

“Hmph,” he clears his throat.

“Your girlfriend’s lucky. A lot of us have to put up with trolls before we find a good guy like you.”

Harry stays silent. Maybe I’d said too much. Maybe I should stop drinking.

“We broke up. Wasn’t good enough for her.”

Shite. Blistered, bloody, bandaged foot directly in mouth..

“I-I’m sorry. To hear that! Oh my god yeah I guess I haven’t seen her in a while-“

“Yeah been a few months now. I’m mostly over it.”

“How long were you two dating again?”

“Almost 3,” Harry twists his mouth to the side. I’d never seen him look bitter before. “I accepted it, the end of us. Until I hear from a friend she jumped right into another relationship. So…that must have been behind the scenes near the end of our relationship.”

Bitter indeed. “That’s a shitty way to find out too.”

“I wish she was just honest. Y’know like, I met someone else whatever. At least that way I took the hit at once and then got over it. Instead after a month of moving on I just got punched all over again.”

“That’s a dick move.” I agree. “I’ve seen you so many times the last few months why didn’t you tell me?”

He shrugs, “I didn’t want to bring down the mood. Felt too loaded for a conversation on the lift.”

“You could have saved it for a walking-to-the-tube conversation?”

“Then just part ways after dropping that on you?”

“Isn’t that perfect?” I tease and he covers his face. I change the subject. ��My 3.5 year relationship ended when he said he didn’t see me as marriage material.”

“I thought it was a mutual breakup?” Harry asks. I’m surprised he remembers what I told him when I first moved in.

“I lied. I didn’t want you to see me as your pathetically lonely neighbour.”

He laughs at that. At least I’d gotten a smile back on his face. “I thought it was a bit suspicious but I didn’t push it. Every time I saw you when you first moved in it always looked like you cried.”

“Oh my god!” I cover my face. “Don’t tell me that! That’s so embarrassing!”

It was true. I cried for three weeks straight after the breakup but I also thought I was sly enough to get around unnoticed.

“It’s not a big deal! I used to worry about you.”

“That’s another thing that’ll keep me up at night now—but see that’s sweet! You barely knew me and you worried. Like! You were raised right.”

“Sure,” he smiles my way with a laugh in his eyes. He was enjoying making me squirm but it’s this smile, one I’d never seen before directed at me, that made me squirm the most.

“Okay now stop being sweet and kick me out.” I gingerly stand and suck up the fresh pain that comes back.

“You can stay as long a-“

“Harry.” I look at him seriously. “I know we both work demanding jobs, and that’s what we have to do tomorrow morning. It’s past midnight and I should go.”

He sighs and gets up to help me hobble to his door.

“Good thing I live next door—oh my shoes. They’re in your-“

“I’ll get them to you later.” He promises.

“You just want to try them on in private.” I tease as he opens his door. He waits while I fish through my purse again for my keys. I remember then the missed calls from Dave—that feels so long ago.

“I like my feet whole.” He chuckles. “Plus I’m tall enough.”

“Some girls think 6 feet is short.”

“How do you know I’m 6 feet?”

I turn my key and let my door swing open.

“I’m good at telling heights.”

“What’s your secret?”

“Well,” I turn back to him and put my hand on my head. “I get my height and then just measure against the person. I gauge the inches which if I’m close enough-“ Harry moved closer to me so there’s only a few inches between us. “Uhm. If I’m close enough it’s easy to count up or down.”

“So you count up-“

“Three or so inches.” I look up, determined to meet his eye. It was just Harry. I didn’t need to feel weird around my neighbour Harry.

But I can’t look away. I never noticed the depth of his eyes; they’re mesmerizing and I can’t look away.

“It’s a neat party trick.” He says so low, but we’re so close it’s loud as hell to my ears. Or maybe that’s the blood rushing through my head.

“Don’t really go to enough parties to turn it into a trick.” My voice comes out squeaky and I clear my throat. “Mostly useful to compare a dating profile to the real thing.”

“Hm,” he hums. His fingers toy with the pinks of my hair before draping it behind my shoulder.

“I should go.” I say for the millionth time.

He looks at me again and I forget why I should go. His gaze drops to my lips and I feel hot—hotter than the pain on my bloody feet.

“You’re the real thing.”

It’s unconscious, the way I arch up to him. It’s natural, the way he meets me halfway. It’s unforgettable, the way his soft lips feel on mine.

Until I lean my weight on my toes and I’m reminded of my broken feet, this evening, and who I was kissing.

I couldn’t be kissing my neighbour! I saw him nearly every damn day!

“Har-“ I push gently at his chest and he’s quick to move back.

“Sorry I-that-“

“No I’m sorry that was me-“

“We should…”

“Yeah.” I grasp behind my back until my hand touches my doorframe. “Um…thanks for everything. Tonight.”

“Yeah.” Harry’s flushed and somehow more attractive than I’ve ever noticed. He also has a smidge of pink lipstick at the corner of his mouth but I file that away for later. “Goodnight.”

“Goodnight!” I turn and quickly close my door, knowing Harry was not going to be the first to leave. Despite my head telling me not to, I turn and peep through the peephole. He’s still leaning against his doorframe, head bowed, running his hand through his hair. I watch him mutter something and then go in. I stay there until the automatic light switches off and then sink to the floor.

Harry. Friendly, funny, neighbour Harry. He’d dressed my bloody feet, served me beer, and then kissed me.

I touch my lips. I wasn’t even mad about it. This was going to be complicated no doubt, but it wasn’t the worst thing in the world.

***

I manage to avoid Harry for a week. Which is a pretty impressive feat given our doors nearly open onto each others.

But he catches me on the lift after work one day. There’s already two others beside me and Harry nearly misses the lift, slipping in just as it’s closing. He does a double take when he sees me.

“Hey.”

“Hey!” Everything was normal. Everything was fine.

“Smart choice of shoes.”

We look down at my Stan Smiths.

“I’ve learned my lesson…for now.” I look back up at the row of numbers. The lift stops on floor 5 and the couple get out.

“You’ve been avoiding me.” He states simply when the door closes.

“I have not!” I finally look at him and nearly lose my breath. When did he become so attractive?!

“We see each other almost every day living the way we do. And you’re telling me we managed to miss each other for a week?”

I shrug, “it’s been a weird week.”

“When did the weird week start?”

Saved by the bell. The doors open to our floors with a ding, but Harry blocks me from my front door.

“Are you serious?” I try to sidestep him but he stays in my path.

“We should talk.”

“We’re talking now.”

“C’mon.” He sighs and moves out of my way. I sigh myself before opening my door and leaving it open behind me. He takes the hint.

“I want to apologize for that night.” Harry says. “I was just feeling vulnerable and it shouldn’t have happened-“

“You’re joking right? I was going on about how good you were and I got a little too into it I think. I totally kissed you so I’m sorry. For making it weird-“

“I kissed you,” Harry tries to correct me.

“No I kissed you so I should apolog-“

“No.” Harry cuts me off.

“Why are we arguing about this?” I throw my hands up. We’re standing in the entryway going back and forth about this. It was stupid. “We’re both sorry. It shouldn’t have happened. Let’s just move on okay?”

“Okay,” he agrees. “So we’re friends? You’re not going to avoid me in the building?”

“No.” I put my hands on my hips. “Cuz I wasn’t avoiding you in the first place.”

He laughs, throwing his head back and my breath catches. I lied. I wasn’t sorry I kissed him but I was sorry it ruined our friendship. Damnit.

“You’re impossible.”

“I thought I was the real thing?” I ask without thinking.

Slightly healed, but still bruised foot, directly in mouth!!!

“Impossible things can be real,” Harry’s mood changes. He stands taller and he takes a step towards me. “Do…do you want us to just move on?”

I don’t know how to answer that.

“I…we live right next to each other Harry. It’s-“

“Unconventional but not impossible.”

“Impossible.”

“But it can still be real.”

I can’t help it. I grin at how serious he was being with his play on words. He was serious about this though. It scared me a little.

“A date.”

“What about it?” I ask.

“We go on a date, see how things are. It they’re weird we go back to friends like we always were. If it’s good…”

“Okay. How about Friday?” I wanted this as much as it seemed like he wanted it. Dating was hard, apps were impossible. This good and kind man standing in front of me was impossible and real.

“Friday’s perfect. Wednesday would be even better.”

“Today is Wednesday.” I say before realizing what he meant.

“It is.”

“Okay. Pick me up at 7?”

“I’ll be on time.” Harry’s grin is contagious.

“Great.” I watch him walk back to the door.

“One favour?” He asks. I ask him what it is. “Wear something pink?”

“Most definitely.” My heart surges and I feel seen. So seen.

I think he was the real thing too. Impossibly real. And possibly something more than neighbourly friends.

Excited and hopeful were an understatement. I couldn’t wait.

#harry styles fic #writingsfromhome #harry styles #harry styles fanfic #harry styles x reader #harry styles fluff #one shot #harry styles one shot #harry styles imagine #fic #impossibly real #i’ve been writing a little again #most of my stuff is angsty and annoying so #heres the fluffier piece lol

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funkyplantguy · 11 days

Note

for the prompt asks thing: how about scarian as musicians of some sort?

rubbing my hands together. excellent, excellent - featuring: drummer!scar and singer!grian (meet-cute! kinda)

- now, in all honesty, grian had assumed that the showers would be empty at this time of night. i mean, really, who showered at 3 in the morning on a tuesday night? (freaks, that was who, freaks, and a totally normal insomniac who had maybe been up a touch too late working on his latest music project). plus - he'd never run into anyone in the showers at this time before, at least not this semester. he'd been pretty quick to memorize the bathroom routines of the people on his floor - and then use that knowledge to avoid each and every one of them. he wasn't antisocial, per say, just very busy - and plus, if he was going to be wasting valuable time showering, anyway, he might as well make use of the frankly incredible acoustics in the bathroom. so that's how he found himself here, standing butt-naked in the showers, his rendition of some old pop ballad tapering off into loud applause from directly outside his shower stall.

"that was really good!" came the voice (one that grian did not recognize - for better or for worse). "wow! you're an incredible singer." the shock of it all left grian speechless - speechless, and frankly a little incredulous at the nerve of his mysterious audience. really - who stood outside of someone's shower stall just...listening to them sing? what kind of stalker behavior was that? was it a fan who had somehow figured out where he went to college? he did have a fanbase, after all - small, but weirdly dedicated. but no, that didn't make sense - they would have had to have a keycard to get into the building, especially at this time of night when there wasn't really anyone coming. then who...?

a few moments and a hasty pair of pajamas later, grian pulled the stall door open to reveal -

oh.

sitting in front of him was a man - a very handsome man at that, all wide, green eyes and genuine, toothy smile. a very handsome man in a wheelchair, parked patiently in front of the only wheelchair-accessible shower stall on the whole floor - namely, the stall that grian had been using. hot shame rose in his cheeks as he shuffled out of the way, clutching his shower bag tightly to his chest.

"sorry," he blurted, sheepishly. "i...i, um...there's usually nobody taking showers this late at night during the week, and, uh, i didn't know that you...um...that...that anyone ever used...or needed to use...uh...oh god, sorry. yeah. sorry. i'll leave you to it."

he turned to scamper back to his dorm room, already anticipating the scolding he'd get from his roommate when he recounted the experience the next morning, but the man's loud laughter had him stopping in his tracks (and not because it was the most gorgeous laugh he'd ever heard in his life, no, definitely not that).

"it's okay!" the other affirmed, light eyes twinkling even in the dull florescent lighting. "no worries - i'm scar, by the way. i just moved in this week. had a bit of a late start - the university messed up some of my accommodations and originally had me over in schaffer."

"the dorms at the top of the hill?" grian gawked, his own blunder momentarily forgotten. "how do they expect you to get up and down that every day?" "my question exactly!" scar responded. "apparently, they "didn't think about that", so...here i am. a bit behind the curve, but hey, what can you do." "complain to the dean, frankly." "tried that. he didn't seem to care." "jesus. this place sucks." "you're telling me!"

a silence fell over the two, then, and grian shifted his weight from foot to foot, suddenly feeling...exposed, under the piercing gaze from the other. he felt like scar was taking him apart with his eyes, studying every visible piece of him and stringing together opinions - conclusions - based on what he saw. fleetingly, grian wished that he'd bought that cute, matching pajama set he'd seen when he'd gone shopping with mumbo the week prior.

"anyway," scar started again, smooth voice cutting easily through the tension. "your voice is really good! i play the drums - we should hang sometime! maybe have a jammy session." "i - a...a what?" "a jammy session! y'know, where you get together and jammy out?" "scar, i think you mean jam out. a jam session?"

"oooooh," scar responded, raising a hand to scratch at his cheek. "yeah, that makes more sense. i thought there was something weird about that, but cub said 'no scar, you're right, it's a jammy session'. i should have known better than to trust that rapscallion." "oh! cub? i know cub! he's dating my roommate, mumbo!" "no way! that's so funny - small world! cub's so annoying about mumbo." "yeah, mumbo's annoying about him, too. it's kinda cute." "definitely cute." they fell into silence once more, one thankfully much less tense than the previous. grian found his eyes darting from scar's eyes to his faded t-shirt, to the small scar above his eyebrow, to the way his long, curly hair fell messily over his shoulder - taking in every aspect of his face, taking him apart in the same way that scar had done to him, mere moments earlier. maybe it was the late hour - maybe grian was more tired than he'd thought - but something about this felt like a dream...like he was going to blink and scar would be gone. he found that he didn't want that to happen. he found that he wanted to wake up tomorrow morning and get to hear that laugh again - that loud, joyful laugh - maybe every day for the rest of his life. "a jam session would be nice," he found himself saying. "maybe you can teach me how to play the drums. i'm really rubbish at most instruments, but maybe drums will be the exception?" "sounds great!" scar chirped back, a warm smile settling on his face. "we'll make a drummer out of you yet. hey - here's my number. text me in the morning, and we'll compare schedules. alright?" "yeah - okay, yeah, i'll do that. goodnight, scar." "goodnight, songbird." it was only an hour later, swaddled in blankets and the comfortable sound of mumbo's snoring, that grian realized he'd never given scar his name. ah well. that could be remedied...at a later date.

#okay this turned out way longer than i anticipated i got a bit carried away #what can i say they're just too cute i love them so much #also you KNOW i had to do background cumbo #grian #goodtimeswithscar #scarian #hermitshipping #august writes #august answers

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suguru-getos · 10 months

Text

Fluffember with Satoru Gojo

Prompt: Sharing a drink

Summary: You are in the early phases of your relationship with Satoru where you haven't even kissed each other yet. Taking things comfortingly and achingly slow. You go on a date with him where you share a drink together. <3 Warnings: None, it's absolutely fluffy in the most Dark Academia of ways since it has an almost poetic depiction of my love for this man lol. I have self-indulged here, so the reader is lean (Mentioning of his palm almost covering our waist); apart from that - nothing else. Let me know if I've missed anything loves x -> Talk to me about the man ;)

You hadn't spent much time with Gojo Satoru yet, however that didn't mean that the early stages of the relationship are not memorable and enticing in the least. Take today for an example, you can't wait for work to finish & go on a coffee date with him. It's barely been 10 days of you two agreeing to be in a committed relationship with each other. Your backgrounds were totally different, your brother goes to Jujutsu High and as his guardian who lives in Japan- you had met Satoru Gojo several times. He had introduced him to you as his teacher when he was 15, and now he is 18. A third year and ready to graduate. Satoru met you when you were 20, and he was 26 that time. There was always an eerie, unspoken mystery between you two. You didn't try on him though, as good looking and fluent in English as he was… something about there being no chances ever to exist caused your behaviour to carry a severe astonishing indifference towards him. Something that bewildered even Satoru always, though he was happy that there is someone who does not kiss the floor he walks on. It felt a good change, the only people who behave normally with him are his male counterparts, and women like Shoko and Utahime who know he is not to be taken so seriously at times.

Until on your brother's 18th birthday, he got him a fucking Mercedes. That was- interesting to say the least. You had talked to him here and there but your brother's birthday bash is the moment when you two started talking for real. Hobbies, what are your favourite places to visit, what irks you off, how his technique works… everything. Hell he cockily showed you his domain as well, something so beautiful you were haunted by it in your dreams.

You shake off all the thoughts in your head when one of your colleagues asked your help in something. He was a junior and often came to you with his series of questions and doubts. So far you hadn't mentored anyone really… though everything has started to remind you about Satoru Gojo. How good of a mentor he is for your sibling… Damn it, that man- you still haven't kissed for fuck's sake! Just gone on a casual movie date when he had to run off when your brother felt his CE in your house. Pft- funny… you can't wait for him to judge Satoru as a boyfriend when you finally tell him.

Satoru Gojo [3:00 PM]: Hey! :D You up for the date after work right???

You bit your lip as your phone's home screen lit up with the familiar name, no you haven't saved his contact cutely yet… you can't afford to move too fast. Don't want to be the one to fall first and fall harder and then get your heart broken to pieces.

You [3:01 PM]: Yeah, ofc! I'd get free by 5. Send me the pin.

Satoru Gojo [3:01 PM]: LOL

Satoru Gojo [3:01 PM]: 🤣🤣😏

Satoru Gojo [3:01 PM]: She thinks I'll not pick her fine ass up, mkay girl

You smiled a little at the text, biting your lip and raising your hand for your colleague to stop talking. He complied, seeing you so occupied and having dusted cheeks.

You [3:02 PM]: Okay, I'll wait :)

You're a dry texter at times, but you can be extremely chaotic when you're comfortable. Satoru still needed to unlock that gremlin potential after all.

Oh you can't wait for your work day to end, glancing at the time, listening to songs, finishing the Knowledge Transfer session with your junior colleague. Finally, it was 5:00 PM. You aren't one of the people who leave work on the dot, but today is an exception. You left your seat at 4:50, gliding towards the washroom and doing a final touch up on your make-up, before leaving outside.

There he stood, the man himself. Body language easy as a breeze, like a relief you'd expect when you see him with a tingle of nervousness that makes your heart ache. Oh he was wearing his glasses today, wearing a black shirt and some formal pants, waving his hands at you with a cheerful grin. He was the tallest amongst everyone walking by, easily visible and the most beautiful and ethereal of course.

You smiled back, walking towards him like an excited child and hugging him softly. Satoru wasn't soft at all though, single-handedly covering almost your entire waist into his palm and pulling you close, letting you drown in his expensive and luxurious cologne. Satoru smelled like power, if it was supposed to be a scent. A unique and distinguished scent that you wouldn't be too creepy to ask right now.

"Gosh little girl, I missed you. What're you doing to me?" He chuckled, walking alongside you and holding your hand possessively, intertwining fingers. Everything felt too much, and nothing at the same time. Nothing as in you wanted more, too much as in you can't take his touches which are now so relevant and so easy for him.

"I missed you too, Satoru." You still slur a little, and he looks down at you from his glasses, he loves how his name sounds from your voice. You've always called him Gojo san out of respect as your brother's sensei. Calling him Satoru helps break any restraints you have bounded yourself in.

Your office was near the bustling labyrinth of Tokyo city, and finding a neat and boujee coffee shop wasn't really hard for your boyfriend. You both walked in, and the barista was as mesmerised by Satoru at first glance as you were. Can't blame her, he is gut-wrenchingly beautiful after all. Sculpted by the gods.

"I'd like uh, to have?" He rips through your stray thoughts and smiles, looking down to match your height and leaning in a little closer to your face. "What'd my girl like to have?" Fucking hell you could combust! "I'd like to have a Chocolate Frappucino with an extra shot of espresso and some vanilla extract & caramel syrup please."

"Oh making a coffee mocktail are we?" Satoru grinned, and looked at the Barista who glanced expectantly at him for his order. "Oh we'd make an extra-large, and make it two straws kay?" He said is so casually though it was the cutest thing that has happened to you so far.

He held your hand and found a place for you and him, pulling your chair like a gentleman. "How was work, little one?" He muses, while you talk to him about your day, how you organized Zumba classes today for your colleagues and how your work was as hectic as ever but nothing to complain since you're not overworked.

He nods, and listens, like- really, really listens. For someone who talks a lot, Satoru was extremely observant and quiet right now.

Then, came the order, the Barista placing the tray with the coffee on the table & sliding in the two straws. "I hope you two enjoy." The venomous formality tinged with jealousy dripped out from her throat as she left. Satoru of course paid no mind… though you could observe how people looked at him. As if he was someone to attain.

You leaned in, wrapping your lips around the straw after dipping it into the coffee and took a sip. "Mm, so good." You almost moan a little at the exquisite taste. Satoru hands you the other straw, while you looked at him bewildered. His lips wrapped around 'your' straw, which had 'your' lipstick imprint and took a sip. Leaving you absolutely flustered and fazed. "So good, true… best thing I've ever tasted in 29 years." He hums with a genuine affirmation that only drives you off the edge. "Stop it, you're so dramatic!" You laughed, taking the other straw and sharing the drink.

How to make silly little things intimate - you could only hope to learn from Satoru Gojo <3 then again, you have several more dates with him to learn it after all. He was whipped and falling desolatingly fast for you.

#gojo satoru #gojo imagines #gojo fluff #jjk fluff #jjk #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen fluff #gojo x reader #jjk x reader #jjk x reader fluff #gojo x reader fluff #jjk imagines #jjk drabbles #gojo drabbles #gojo satoru x reader #jujutsu kaisen x you

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storydays · 7 months

Text

Overture: Part 2

(3rd POV)

*With Charlie*

"Hello? Creepy..." Charlie called into the building as she looked around, walking towards the front desk. "Oh!" Charlie watched as a scroll and quill came in front of her. "Also, creepy." she smiled awkwardly, as she signed her name. A door opened up into a dark room, and Charlie walked in, calling out again, "Hello?"

" 'Sup." A male voice startled the demoness, making her fall on the floor. "Holy shit!" She yelped. Light had came on to reveal two angels, one sitting and the other standing behind the first.

Standing up, Charlie pushed her bangs back. "Hi! I'm Charlie, and my brother has sent me to meet you." "Yeah, I know." replied the yellow angel, lazily. "Okay, well, it is nice to meet you." Charlie held her hand out to shake, the angel leaning forward to shake it, "Totally, nice to meet you too." Charlie gasped when her hand passed through his.

"Ha! I fuckin' got you! DId you fuckin' see that?!" He cackled to the grey angel beside him, who nodded at his answer. "Good shit." He laughed to himself.

"Uh, so wait, you aren't here?" wondered Charlie. "No, you think I'd come down there?" He laughed again.

"No, I mean, I love the vibe, totally; I love your tunes. Pretty fuckin' hardcore, don't get me wrong. But it's such a bummer, man. Everything down there, is so..eugh, ya know. Ew." He cringed at the thought.

"Right..so I'm happy that we got this opportunity to meet! There's a project that I've been working on that I really want to talk to you about--" Charlie eyed the angel as he shushed her.

"Hey, hey, hey, slow down. We got time; how about we get to know each other, mm? How about some lunch? You hungry? I got you!" The yellow angel held up a plate of ribs, offering it to the demoness. "Here's my personal favorite. You'll love it."

Charlie smiled politely. "Um, thanks." As she reached for some, her hand went through it. The angel laughed loudly. "I got you again, bitch! Haha! Fuckin' hilarous! Haha!" The princess laughed sarcastically, annoyed by his childishness.

*Back at the hotel*

Vaggie had gathered everyone in the main foyer. Angel had his legs on (Y/N)'s lap again, and was enjoying how flustered the prince looked. The blond tried to ignore the spider but was failing miserably.

"Okay, Charlie's doing something very important, so while she's gone, we are making a new commercial." Vaggie smiled, thinking of her energetic girlfriend, before holding her hand out expectantly. "So, we need a camera. Alastor?"

The deer demon snapped his fingers and an old fashioned camera meant for photos appeared. "A video camera." snapped the Latina woman. "Hmm." Alastor hummed before giving her the requested item. "Alright, let's do this." Vaggie grinned.

"Aaand action!"

" 'Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel. Can I help you?' " Husk read from the script, from where he was standing behind the bar.

"I've been a bad boy, and I need a big, strong Daddy to put me in my place....on the path to redemption." Angel started sultrily, purposely stretching his body out, showing himself off. (Y/N) snorted behind his own script; that spider was such an idiot sometimes.

"Well, you come--" Husk started before being interrupted by Angel's moan of , "Oh yes!" (Y/N) started laughing harder, as Husk continued his lines through gritted teeth, "To the right place."

"Cut!" Vaggie sighed, putting the camera down and turning towards the men.

"Okay, Angel, I need you to be less horny, if possible. (Y/N), stop encouraging him. And Husk, can you not have the script right in your face?" Vaggie commented. Husk bristled, clearly angry, "I ain't no act! I can't memorize this shit!" He slapped the paper in his hand as Angel leaned in closer.

"Well, we could improve this shit, babycakes. Rawrr." The Italian spider purred seductively.

Husk frowned and pushed the spider into (Y/N) who wasn't even paying attention, and sent both men to the floor. "Oof," grunted Angel as he landed on (Y/N), knocking his glasses off and--

"Fuck, my nuts!" groaned (Y/N), curling in a fetal position.

Angel had accidentally kneed him...right where the sun don't shine.

"Whoops." Husk winced; he'd only meant for the spider to get out of his personal space. (Y/N) was really one of the only people he'd gotten along with. "My bad, (Y/N)."

"I could do something with your nuts, (Y/N)." Angel teased, but shivered when the prince shot a icy glare in his direction. "Or maybe later," he muttered, rubbing (Y/N)'s back soothingly as he waited for the pain to stop.

"Guys, come on." Vaggie sighed, as Husk picked up a bottle and started drinking again.

*Back with Charlie*

"So I was playing this gig, and for some fucking reason, this virtue chick was diggin' on the drummer and it's like, do you know who I am? I'm fuckin' Adam! I'm the original dick. All dicks descend from me! You think you want drummer dick? No way! I'm the fuckin' dickmaster!" Adam obnoxiously slurped on his ribs before continuing his story.

"So anyway, we fucked and it was awesome. What'd you do this weekend?" He asked a very bored looking Charlie.

"Wait, your name is Adam? Like the first man, Adam? That means you--Ohhh, that explains so much." Charlie realized. "I know, I fuckin' rock." Adam sent the princess a 'rock on sign'. "Well, Adam, sir. Mr Adam, sir--"

"Call me dickmaster." smirked the angel.

"Adam," Charlie emphasized, clearly done with Adam. "You seem like a smart--well, stand up guy."

"Uh-huh." Adam agreed as he picked his teeth.

"And I know you are the leader of the Angel Army and you are a big thinker, a revolutionary, a--a genius," Charlie complimented.

"I mean your words, babe." Adam was clearly enjoying the compliments.

"Who would really love to put his name on something." Charlie kept revving Adam up. "Fuckin' love puttin' my name on shit!" Adam stood excitedly. "Shit's the best!"

Charlie nodded along, "It's a solution to our biggest problem!"

"Ohh, herpes! Yeah, that's a bitch." Adam cringed.

"No! Our other biggest problem." The princess tried hinting at again.

"Oh, uh, ugly people? Math? Global warming? Nah, wait, that's Earth's problem. Umm...." Charlie blinked at the Angel...there was no way he was this stupid, right?

*Back at the hotel*

Niffty giggled as she chased a bug with a giant needle in her hand. "Hehehe, stab, stab, stab!" "Alright, Niffty." Vaggie called before turning to kneel in front of the cyclops. "Niffty. Niffty? Niffty! Your line is, 'We have the cleanest rooms.' Okay?" Niffty nodded excitedly, "Got it! I'm ready!" Vaggie grabbed the camera and started to record. "And action."

Niffty's smile dropped immediately and she zoned out, her pupil shrinking to a little dot. Vaggie stopped recording and lowered the camera,as she, Angel and (Y/N) stared at the cyclops with wide eyes. "Uhh...cut."

Niffty smiled, "How was that?" "Well Niffty, you have to actually say the line. Let's try again."

Same results as last time.

Angel leaned down to whisper in Vaggie's ear, "Yo're doing great Vagina." He whispered, mockingly. "Cut! Alright, um, maybe we can try to fix it in post." Vaggie thought aloud. "Do you even know what that means?" asked (Y/N). "I'll figure it out." the white haired woman snapped, not noticing the looks that the two men exchanged.

Vaggie went into a room and groaned in annoyance as the TV showed a lot of static,and barely audible sound. "Seems like you're having a bit of trouble there, eh?" Alastor grinned as he watched Vaggie.

"Ugh, este pendejo. " She cursed, before turning to the deer demon. "Why are you even here?"

Alastor sat on the opposite couch of Vaggie, his shadow crouching behind him with a sinister smile. "I came here because I love seeing wasteful souls struggle to accomplish something meaningful and fail spectacularly, like you are doing now! Good job!" He mocked cheerfully.

Scowling, Vaggie turned the camera on, and started recording, "And here is Alastor, an egocentric piece of shit--" She yelped as the camera shorted out from the demon's power. "I wouldn't try that, my dear. This face was made for radio." His eyes changed into radio dials, his mouth changed to a speaker,and his body began changing in bendy ways, as voodoo symbols floated around him.

Vaggie narrowed her eye at him. "That's it! I don't care who or what you are. If you're staying here, you are going to make this work. Because it won't be so 'entertaining' to watch over a empty hotel, will it shitass?" She snapped, walking back to her chair.

Alastor's eyes and smile narrowed before he shrugged.

"Fair enough. I'll tell you what: let's make a deal." Scoffing, Vaggie flopped back into her seat.

"You think I'm that stupid? Making a deal with a demon like you?"

"Not for your soul." The Radio Demon rolled his eyes before continuing, "Just a simple deal: I do this for you, and you never ask me to engage with this frivolous television technology again." He narrowed his eyes at the television. "Or...Charlie comes back to absolutely nothing!" The deer dropped the radio effect from his voice as he turned to smirk at Vaggie, "Your choice."

Sighing heavily, the purple demoness agreed. "Fine." She handed the video camera into Alastor's waiting hand, sealing the deal.

"Now then!" Alastor clapped his hands, and the hotel occupants and a camera crew appeared with equipment. With another snap, the Hotel company were all dressed in outfits from the 1920's.

"Alright, let's make a fucking commercial."

*Back with Charlie*

"When you take her out for the fifth time, and she still expects you to pay the check, but you're like, 'Hey, I thought you want equality/'?" Adam mocked a woman's voice. "NOO! Our shared problem of overpopulation in Hell!" Charlie snapped, a desperate look in her eye. "Ohh! Well, that's not a problem. We've got that covered. Lute, how many demons did you kill this year?" Adam asked the silent lieutenant.

"Got a good 275, sir." she replied, coldly.

"275?! Woah, badass! Awesome job, danger tits! Pound it." The two angels shared a fist bump.

"Uh, no, that's not awesome! Those are my people, you know that, right?" Charlie stood, worry written on her face. "Ohh, yeah....That must suck for you! Hahaha!" Adam laughed.

"But these are souls. Human souls, just the same as you have in Heaven." the blonde frowned. "They are not the same." Lute said bluntly, "They had their chance and they earned damnation."

"You're wrong!" Charlie disagreed. "Sinners made mistakes, sure, but everyone makes mistakes." "ANGELS don't make mistakes." hissed Lute. Charlie crossed her arms, "You really think that?" she raised an eyebrow.

"I know that." replied the exorcist.

"Yeah, I've never made a mistake in my fuckin' life." Adam agreed as Lute circled the princess. "The only reason you're still here, is because Daddy gave you and your Hellborn kind, a pardon from an exorcist blade. How's that you feel? To know how little you matter." Lute said coldly, returning to Adam's side.

"Oops! Almost out of time. Guess we should get into it." Adam sighed lazily.

"Oh fuck!" Charlie face palmed, and rushed closer to the two angels."Okay, I've got a lot to get through and not a lot of time." Charlie summoned a stack of paperwork. "And I feel like you weren't hearing me before, so here it goes."

"Awh, shit!" Charlie cursed banging on the door from where she was thrown out.

*Back at the hotel*

Charlie walked into the hotel sadly, before being greeted by her brother, who was sitting at the bar, with paperwork and a another strawberry Daiquiri in front of him, glasses perched on the edge of his nose.

He looked up at the young woman and smiled, waving his hand to send the paper work away, and taking his drink in his hand, before going over to Charlie. "Hey, sis...how'd it go?"

As he got closer, he noticed his sister's bubbly demeanor was gone, "Hey, what's wrong?"

Charlie opened her mouth before being interrupted by Vaggie hugging her. "Charlie! How'd it go? Did they listen?" Vaggie looked at Charlie hopefully.

"They sure did...hear it. But um,--" "Oh! Come here! We have something exciting to show you!" Vaggie excitedly dragged Charlie to the living room where everyone was gathered.

"Alastor pulled a few limbs, and it's about to air." (Y/N) grinned as he came to stand in between Husk and the Radio Demon, as Charlie and Vaggie sat on the couch by Niffty and Angel Dust who lounged on the floor.

"I pulled a few limbs, too!" Alastor laughed. (Y/N) shook his head at his antics.

"Wait, the commercial? You all made a new one?" Charlie asked.

"Yeah, one of my better performances if I do say so myself." Angel smiled lazily as Charlie teared up, holding her hands over her heart.

"That's amazing." She said, tearfully, before Angel shushed her. "SHH! It's startin'" He growled.

On screen, we see the hotel members dressed up; Angel blowing kisses to the camera and at (Y/N) ,who was fighting the urge to blush, before sending smirk at the spider followed by a playful middle finger. Husk was drinking his cheap booze, Niffty staring at the camera, and Alastor wasn't even facing the camera, and glitching slightly.

Vaggie smiled at the camera, "Welcome to the Hazbin Hot-" Suddenly, it was cut off to reveal a news story.

Vaggie and Angel both shouted in their native languages at the TV and the royal demons' eyes changed to their demon form eyes, both barring their teeth in anger.

"Breaking news in Hell today! We have just received word from the Heaven Embassy that the next extermination is happening sooner than ever before! Do you know what that means, Tom" asked the female reporter, turning to her co-host.

"What does that mean, Katie?" Tom asked with a head tilt.

"It means we are all royally fucked." Katie replied as the screen showed the clock changing the days to 176.

"Wait, what? Why" demanded Angel.

"Charlie...." (Y/N) turned towards his sister, "That'd be the kind of thing that's important for me to know before hand." "Sorry, got distracted by the commercial." Charlie sighed, placing her head in her hands in dismay.

*meanwhile*

A angelic hovercraft was scanning over the rummage of the remains of the extermination.

"We found the body, sir. They've never managed to kill one of us before. We should just go down there now and destroy them!" Lute hissed, her wings fluttering in anger.

"No,no. We can't risk them catching on. But don't worry, when we come back, there won't be a demon alive to pull a stunt like this again!" Adam yelled, smashing the projector, before smiling wickedly.

*With (Y/N)*

With a groan, the prince of Hell flopped back onto a couch. Bending over paperwork for hours on end, did nothing for his back.

Fuck, he was only 225, why did his back hurt so much?

(Y/N) sighed, closing his eyes as the little cat from earlier came over, and curled up on his arms, purring loudly.

"Hey, KeeKee. Hey pretty girl," he cooed, running his hands over the cat's soft fur.

"Ugh, my back." He groaned, feeling his muscles protest at the movement.

"Hey, sweetcheeks." A voice purred in his ear, making him lazily open his violet eye to peek at the spider who grinned widen seeing he had his attention.

"Mm, not now, Angel, my back his killing me."

"Oh, as much as I'd love to take you in position, big daddy, I was actually coming to offer another one of my services." Angel held up a bottle of oil. "Being bent over something for a long time can really be hard on the back. Lemme help?"

(Y/N) eyed the spider, looking for any of his usual antics, but found sincerity. "Okay, let's go to my office. I have a spare bed, for nights I don't feel like going to my room." He used his magic to transport himself and the spider, before lazily walking to the space bed.

Angel looked around the office, smiling softly at all the photos of the prince and his family. "Take your shirt off, and lay on your belly. Don't worry, I'll be careful with your wings." He waited patiently for (Y/N) to take his shirt off, smiling as he took in the view of the blond's body, clearly he took care of himself.

"No funny business." (Y/N) said, groaning softly at the pain in his back. "No funny business," agreed Angel before he straddled (Y/N)'s butt, causing him to blush slightly. "Um, what--" "I won't be able to properly massage you from the side. I swear, no funny business. Just wanted to help ya," Angel waited until (Y/N) nodded.

Angel poured the massage oil in his ungloved hands, all four, and warmed it up in his hands, before getting to work.

(Y/N) sighed softly, enjoying as the Italian spider worked out his sore muscles, being sure to include the demon's wings as well.

"Thanks, Angel."

"Qualunque costa per te, bambola."

(Y/N) smiled to himself, deciding to keep the fact that he knows every language in the world to himself as Angel hummed an old song from his childhood.

The two sat in silence as unaware as Charlie closed the door, smiling, letting the two be.

'They would be so cute.' she grinned to herself.

#hazbin husk #hazbin hotel charlie #hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin angel dust #x male reader #hazbin charlie #hazbin vaggie #hazbin niffty #viziepop

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bitter69uk · 5 months

Text

“The men sat in the next booth at the Brown Derby. My back was to them. Suddenly I perked up as I heard my name. “Liz Renay,” one of them said. “There’s a girl who had some tough breaks.” “She brought it on herself,” the other voice said. “Still … it’s kind of sad. She wasn’t just another one of those French pastries who come to Hollywood to look for fame. She had it. She has one of the most beautiful faces I ever saw. You know, she just missed being great.” I turned to get a look at the man who had just spoken. I recognized him as William Ornstein, a reporter for Hollywood Reporter. Ornstein spoke again: “Yeah, that Renay really could have made it big. She was on the way to becoming a superstar. Add a few good breaks and subtract a few of the bad ones and you know, she could have been Marilyn Monroe.”

/ From Liz Renay’s chatty, meandering autobiography My Face for the World to See (1971) /

Born on this day: the sublime Liz Renay (née Pearl Elizabeth Dobbins, 14 April 1926 - 22 January 2007) – b-movie actress / burlesque queen / jailbird / naive outsider painter / gangster Mickey Cohen’s moll / “Streaking Grandmother” / authoress of multiple volumes of sordid memoirs (including My First 2,000 Men and Staying Young) / all-round kitsch icon and the woman hailed by John Waters as “my idea of total glamour.” For Waters’ fans, Renay is venerated for her performance as Muffy St Jacques in punk masterpiece Desperate Living (1977) - especially for her acidic delivery of lines like, "I was having an erotic dream!" and "I sleep in the room next door - naked!" She’s also memorable in The Thrill Killers (1964) and The Hard Road (1970).

#lobotomy room #liz renay #john waters #desperate living #burlesque #vintage smut #vintage sleaze #b movie #muffy st jacques #kitsch #streaking grandmother #my face for the world to see #bouffant wig

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zombii-ships · 10 months

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SDJ BOYS AS : BARTENDERS

Jack:

Probably a restaurant bar kind of guy. Loves to make a show out of pours, lots of tricks and pretty drinks and unexpected ingredients. You know that one video of the guy pouring out shots that make a rainbow? Yeah that’s him. He’s a total ham and he loves chatting up patrons, gives very polite advice. Jack’s a real sweetheart, he checks in on frequenters and he’s quick to cut people off if he needs to. Def gives out too many freebies but he’s just kind. He’s got a fun pun name for every custom mix he does. A hopeless romantic that loves giving cute drinks to people on dates.

Shaun:

Def at like a rave club or a goth club. Besties with the dj, so quite a few of the songs in the playlist are per his recommendation. Lots of jokes and super snarky with patrons. He’s the type to people watch and flag down regulars to catch up. He gives really unbiased opinions, like talking to a friend. You cannot out flirt him dude, but he will think it’s cute if you try. Def the type of guy to name his custom mixes after horror icons. He’s always jamming behind the bar, he’s got an ear to the ground and he’s plugged in to all the cool places in town if you ask. Get him talking about films and you’ll be there all night, but it’s a great talk.

Nick:

Gives me Jazz Club/ Night Club vibes

Quiet, but smirks a lot at patrons conversations. He’s in his element, dude’s like hypnotic. He kinda grooves while he mixes, like he’s on beat with it. Starts patrons off with a couple questions, then makes them something that he thinks would suit them. He’s mostly going on feel, but his instincts are almost always right. He’s really quippy if he knows you, but you’ve got to get to that point. He’s got all the regulars favorites memorized.

Ian:

Theater Bar. Every show he’s got memorized, you can absolutely hear him singing along when a musical is showing. He’s shy, and a little clumsy, but he’s charming with patrons. A great shoulder to lean on, loves listening and secretly relishes in the drama he hears at the bar. Doesn’t do a lot of original drinks, more-so just tests things out while he’s at home and writes them down. Will hand out his headshots if the occasion calls for it. They’re just. on a shelf under the bar. Most likely to take lil shots every now and then. You can hear him occasionally rehearsing for his own acting career under his breath as he works.

Bonus Jacktor:

Biker Bar all the way. Definitely picks up shifts whenever he drifts into another town. He seems really really reserved but in the occasional quiet moment you can hear him snickering at a joke. Breaks up fights SO fast. All it takes is for him to talk to folks for like a minute and it’s all good. Never stays in the same place for long, he likes the changing energy and hearing people’s stories. Puts the crowd pleasers that everyone knows on the jukebox just to see everyone have fun. Master of keeping the vibes cool. Does that thing where you slide the glass down the counter to somebody. Huge flirt, but just as easily flustered. He looks like he’s exhausted being there, but really he’s just focused. Seems really intense, but hes just quiet. Huge sweetie.

#sdj jack #sdj joseph #sdj shaun #sdj ian #sdj nick #swwsdj #sdj au #PLEASE idk if this makes any sense im very sleepy #i just thought theyd all look cute mixing drinks #somethings wrong with sunny day jack

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stars-n-spice · 7 months

Text

I have a lot of thoughts regarding the first three episodes that are bouncing around my brain and I'm going to try and wrangle them up here in this post-

They will probably not be coherent or in order of the episodes or what happened but they're thoughts-

Spoilers for TBB S3 under the cut!

Hemlock is such a dickwad, holy shit. What a great antagonist, kriffing hell. When he made threats to hurt Crosshair in response to Omega's disobedience?? FUCK.

Crosshair and Omega my beloveds,, they have my hearts, I love them so much

Crosshair's shaky hands. I can see the floodgates of all the angsty art and fics that are going to come out of that. IT AFFECTING HIS AIM??? Gods above- If we get a scene of someone holding his hands while they're shaking I'm going to lose it

I'm a fucking clown for thinking we'd get Crosshair's reaction to the news of Tech's death. Absolutely CLOWN. Like they didn't give us Echo's reaction to Fives, of course they wouldn't give us Crosshair's to Tech's

Speaking of Tech,,, I think I speak for a lot of us when I say that special trooper in all black is totally him,, right?? The scrawny ass legs?? The goggles on the helmet?? Fuck,, I even think I saw the guy limp away.. It HAS to be him

THEY HAVE A DOG NOW!!! That's so sweet :(

You guys do not understand the immediate reaction I had to seeing Omega older with the new hairstyle (which I love). Fucking burst out into tears at the sight

Nala Se is so dead. So dead. I've never seen a more deader alive character than Nala Se.

Also my hopes for Emerie helping them or turning out good or something went down the drain :(

OMEGA IS FORCE SENSITIVE??? like,, that's what they're implying right??? They wanna have DNA or whatever to make Palp clones yeah??? Is that were this is going??? FUCK.

On that note, if she IS force sensitive I really really really wanna see Asajj helping her out with that because I think that would be fucking NEAT

Omega making a Lula doll out of straw took me out :( I was holding my own Lula plushie and crying

Crosshair is such a little shit. I love how he was trying to dissuade Omega from escaping with him by saying shit like, "If I got the chance, I'd leave you behind" and the moment that Omega's like, "I've got a plan" he's like "What do I do?"

Them hijacking a whole squad's ship was fucking hilarious though, get fucked

"Tech had me memorize all the plans." - "Of course he did." <- bawling my eyes out.

SO DOES THIS MEAN WE HAVE TO WATCH OMEGA GET CAPTURED AGAIN?!?!

OK ONTO THE ADVENTURES OF HUNTER AND WRECKER

ECHO ALREADY FUCKING LEFT??? <- i knew we wouldn't get like,, a conversation or a reason,, it would just be he left off screen and we've got to deal with that

Echo my love come back :(

On another note,, Wrecker and Hunter's beat up armor is such a good look but also ouch because it shows all the shit they've been through since the last season

Y'all don't understand how great it is to see my man again (Wrecker ily so much)

SPEAKING OF MY MAN!! The little,, fucking touches of reassurance he kept giving Hunter?? How he was being a voice of reason?? making sure Hunter didn't do anything reckless?? :((

I know that man is tired and he's trying so hard to hold the last remaining bits of their squad together and it hurts so bad but I love him so much for it

Clone Cadets :(( they don't really look like clones though :/ but to be expected ig....

THEY'RE GONNA TAKE THEM TO PABU :((((

the lula and tech's goggle shots took me out

Hunter fumbling around with Tech's datapad :(((

Wrecker carrying Gonky upside down with the harness was fucking amazing, oh my god

"Defective AND effective" DAMN RIGHT YOU TELL HIM 여보!!!

'slither vines' fucking ass name

makes you wonder what else hemlock is cookin up

Wrecker laughing and talking with the clone cadets :(

GONKY TO THE RESCUE

Either next episode we're going to get Hunter & Wrecker back on Pabu or continuation of Omega and Crosshair crashing their ship somewhere and Omega potentially being captured again and Crosshair eventually being reunited with Hunter & Wrecker (pretty please)

Anyways,, thankfully the episodes weren't as devastating as I thought they would be but I know it's only going to get worse from here before it (hopefully) gets better.

#i have a lot of emotions #man #now i have to wait a week for the next episode??#man this is going to be painful #tbb #tbb spoilers #tbbspoilers #the bad batch #tbb s3 #tbb s3 spoilers #tbb omega #tbb crosshair #tbb hunter #tbb wrecker #tbb tech #tbb echo

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blank-house · 10 months

Note

What do they smell like? Do you think there's specific shampoos, perfumes or anything else everyone would use?

I had to think about this one since I never really gave it any or much thought before.

But after a serious chat with a writer on the team we think that:

Deja

She would rarely use perfume. If she does then it’s the kind that you can’t put a name on it. Like— it just smells sharp and nice, good but not memorable. And it’s because she wouldn’t wanna have a lingering heavy scent.

We also think she would smell like cookies. Not vanilla, or chocolate, but cocoa because of the product she would use for her hair and her lotion. Cocoa butter is very good on her.

Reynah

She would def use perfume that has a fruity smell. Strawberries, oranges, a Spring picnic basket lmao. If not from her perfume then definitely from her shampoo and lotion.

I think it changes often though. Like one day you’d smell watermelon on her then the next it’s cherries. Idk I think I’d get like hungry if I’m to sit next to her.

Cameron

haha, we joke that they smell like fries because of the amount of takeout they get.

But in all seriousness, they probably would smell of lavender. Though not from any hair products and not from any perfume or cologne either. It’s from their aromatherapy, calms them.

Percy

Sorry for the total lack of description here- but we think he smells cold. You know how winter air feels when you breathe in? Yeah, that.

Something more descriptive is cucumber. It’s subtle but fresh, refreshing. His scent’s probably from his shampoo. He just wouldn’t really use cologne.

Jamie

He does use cologne. But it’s the same case as Deja. It just smells clean. Specifics though would be sandalwood, fresh linen, and eucalyptus.

Jamie wouldn’t be a fan of any powerful scents either. He just wants something light.

Lilly, my writer pal, pulled up Palo Santo and Sage from B&BW, and like I never smelled it before but that feels right.

Elio

HEAR US OUT: SUMMER

Like we’re joking, but we both agree that he just smells like the sun. Which is funny because in Tagalog we have a phrase for that but it’s not as cute sounding. But I still think it applies since he would be out and about often.

Other than that, apples and citrus came to mind too. Lilly says, Yuzu fruits smell like that so we’re rolling with it! Oh, and ocean spray- that also feels like Elio.

This question really did stump me haha I’m like- gonna go visit a local candle store or something soon for research. But all in all we don’t think the cast would overall care about using perfume or cologne save for Reynah and Jamie!

#keyframes vn #keyframes asks #elio #percy #jamie #cameron #deja #reynah

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mammondrivesamazdamiata · 1 year

Text

Obey Me! Boys as Baristas in a coffee shop

I myself am a barista and so I feel qualified enough to make assumptions :P Enjoy

(includes foul language lol)

Lucifer

- The opening manager

- Clean freak

- Always has a rag tucked into the pocket of his apron

- Arrives fifteen minutes early every morning and complains about it

- Keeps everyone on task during rushes

- Will passive aggressively argue with customers

"I want a medium cappuccino. Don't make it a latte. I don't want milk to the top, I want about two inches of foam."

"Ma'am, please do not speak to me like I don't know what I'm doing. I'm aware of what a cappuccino is and how to make it. Unless you'd like to come behind the counter and make it yourself?"

- Will snap at his crew when he's stressed and apologize for it later

- Freaks out when nothing is stocked

Mammon

- Strictly an order taker on most days

- Can not remember recipes to save his life

- Constantly gets into these long, drawn out conversations with customers and has to be reeled back in

- Honestly great at customer service, but totally fake

"Bye, guys! Have a good one!" *Turns around* "Holy shit they were fucking annoying."

- Has a crush on every good-looking person that comes in

- Pretty good at memorizing regular customer orders and tries to have their order saved into the POS system before they arrive

- LOVES making pup cups. He considers it the best part of his job. Will argue with Satan over who gets to hand it out

- Always gets stuck mopping the floors because no one else wants to do it

- Will straight up eat espresso beans

Levi

- Actually a very good barista

- Memorizes recipes and measurements really fast

- Can be seen carrying multiple drinks in his arms during a rush

"I've got the entire first and second tickets, so don't worry about those."

- So bad at customer service. So awkward. Not allowed to take orders unless he knows the person

- Will start dancing on the line when he thinks he's alone. Runs to the back and hides when he realizes a customer was standing at the counter watching him

- Eats a single croissant on his break

- Puts 6 shots of espresso in his drink every day. Lucifer is deeply considering cutting him off

- Won't take a bathroom break until it's an emergency

Satan

- The baker

- Usually opens with Lucifer to catch up on baking. He hates this and ignores Lucifer the whole morning

- Loves to decorate cupcakes and sugar cookies for the holidays/seasons. Always gets compliments on them

- Him and Asmodeus always come up with the specialty drinks every month

- Fights with Diavolo every day about making the coffee shop a cat cafe instead

- Would rather make food orders than coffee orders

- Gets stuck prepping everything

- In charge of inventory orders. Won't even ask anyone to help him because he doesn't trust them to do it right

- Gets so frustrated during rushes

- Will slam things until he's forced to step outside to take a breather

- Will argue with customers if they catch him on a bad day

"Jeez, seven dollars for a latte? Are you kidding me?"

"Well, yeah, it's a dollar-fifty up-charger for oat milk."

"That seems ridiculous!"

"Listen, I don't make the prices, lady, now are you going to give me your money or not?"

Asmodeus

- Employee of the month

- Literally so good at customer service

- Everyone loves working with him because he's constantly getting tipped

- Addresses regulars by name and compliments them

"Liz, did you change your hair? It looks so good!"

*Gasps* "I love your nails! Where do you get them done?"

"Good morning, Ron, are we just doing your small French roast today?"

- Is also confident in his ability to take orders

"Wow, I really am just a delight to talk to."

- Always leaves milk on the counter or forgets to close the fridges after making something

- Keeps forgetting to empty the espresso pucks after pulling. Pisses off Levi to no end

- Likes making cold drinks over hot drinks

- Doesn't even like coffee. Drinks chai lattes almost exclusively

- Flirts with customers

- Refuses to count registers

"Nah, I'm too cute for math 😊"

Beel

- Closing shift manager

- Keeps getting in trouble for sneaking bites of food between orders

Lucifer: "Beel, you cannot keep eating pickles out of the container when you're not wearing gloves that's cross contamination."

"Try and stop me."

- Every customer's barista crush. He's completely clueless to all advances

- gets hangry and snaps at his coworkers

- eats some pasta salad and is perfectly fine afterwards

- Closing shift always calls on him for customer complaints because he's such a large individual and can be really intimidating

- Will procrastinate the closing list all day and haul ass for the entire last hour to get it done on time

- Holds a lot of grudges against his coworkers but doesn't say anything to avoid conflict

- Will be fine all day but blows up at the slightest inconvenience

- Likes to take the trash out so he can decompress in peace behind the dumpsters

Belphie

- Hates his job

- Only works there because Beel convinced him to apply

- So clumsy

- Always spills drinks

- Won't argue with customers but glares at them from across the counter

- Counts registers at the end of the night

- Complains about everything

- Wants to start the closing list five hours before the cafe even closes

- Will purposefully mess up drinks for customers he doesn't like

"One Soy latte. You're all set." *Under his breath* "Joke's on you, bitch, that was 2%."

- Talks about putting in his two weeks every month but never actually does it

- Always forgets to write dates on items he opens

Diavolo

- The owner, obviously

- Has no idea how to do anything, so he leaves the brunt of cafe work to Lucifer and Barb

- Tried to make coffee for a customer once and forgot to put espresso in it

- Hands things out to the wrong customers, so the boys have to remake orders constantly when Diavolo's working with them

- Has to be restrained from making terrible business decisions

Diavolo: "Hey, what if we did a Bloody Mary bar on the weekends?"

Lucifer: "Not happening."

Diavolo: "Well, it's a good thing I'm the owner and can do whatever I want 😝"

Lucifer: "WE DON'T HAVE A LIQUOR LICENSE."

Diavolo: "Oh... How do you get one of those?"

- Goes on a cruise every month and leaves the cafe to be run by his employees

Barbatos

- Exhausted

- Handles all finances

- Sees a mouse one time and loses his mind

- Clean, clean, cleanCLEANCLEANCLEAN

- Quietly cries while he signs paychecks

- Has a nervous breakdown every time the health inspector stops by

- Stops Diavolo from making OSHA violations

Undateables as customers! (bonus)

Solomon

- Kind of a dick

- Leaves 50 cent tips

- Always complains that his black coffee is too cold

- Will not drink it unless it's 200+ degrees

- Always asks for a sleeve even though he's been told multiple times that it's already built into the cup

Simeon

- Gets a really complicated drink but all the baristas love him so it's okay

- Large iced dirty chai with 2 shots of espresso and oat milk, light ice

- Usually leaves a tip that's more than his drink

- Gossips with everyone that works there

- Super patient no matter how long it takes them to get his order out

- Diavolo keeps trying to give him a job, but Simeon is smart enough to kindly refuse

- Brings his work and sits in the lobby for hours

Luke

- Orders a hot chocolate (frozen or hot depending on the time of year) with whip cream and rainbow sprinkles

- One time he burned his tongue so bad that Lucifer gave him free drinks for a week

- Luke would just put the amount the drink cost into the tip jar instead because he felt bad

"You could pour hot coffee in my lap and I'd probably apologize to you."

- Asked for a job once. Mammon convinced Barb not to hire him on grounds of "he's so annoying."

#obey me!#obey me out of context #lucifer obey me #mammon obey me #levi obey me #satan obey me #asmodeus obey me #beel obey me #belphegor obey me #obey me diavolo #obey me au

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