#yoga world records

[townpostin]

Health Minister Banna Gupta Honors Renowned Yoga Guru Pranav Naha

Pranav Naha, a renowned yoga guru, honored by Health Minister Banna Gupta for his achievements. Pranav Naha, recently recognized in the Yoga Book of World Records, was honored by Jharkhand’s Health Minister Banna Gupta on Saturday. JAMSHEDPUR – Jharkhand’s Health Minister Banna Gupta honored renowned yoga guru Pranav Naha on Saturday. Pranav Naha was recognized for his recent entry into the Yoga…

[webworldrecords]

Luminary in Karate and Yoga

Dr. Karate A.P. Srinath, promine­nt in karate and yoga, has a 5th Dan Black Belt and various awards. He mixe­s yoga into his karate approach, encouraging both mind and body unity. Being the­ CEO and President of Indian Sports Wing, he motivate­s many with his passion for martial arts and self-protection. Read this blog for more info https://webworldrecords.com/luminary-in-karate-and-yoga/

[harikrishnaexports]

[harrisonarchive]

Ad published in Record World, June 1979.

“If you look at the chart in yoga, there’s these energy centers. Now there’s the chakra at the heart which is where the feeling of love comes from, you know, if you feel sick you feel it in the chakra in the stomach, if you feel love you feel it in the heart. And that’s unchanging. The only thing that changes is the bodily condition. From the womb to a baby to a boy and a young man, and then you’re middle aged, then you turn into an old man and then you die. You know, you come out in this shape, this fetus bent over and then you come till you’re up like this, and then you bend over and then you die. But the one thing that’s remained the same all through is that soul, in the heart, that thing comes from life to death, life to death. Krishna in the Bhagavad Gita says: ‘There’s never a time when we weren’t, and there’ll never be a time when we cease to be.’ The only thing that changes is bodily condition.” - George Harrison, KMET, June 1979 (x)

[strangelittlestories]

Here in the end times, it feels like everyone got a little weird.

That'll happen, you know? In a city of bondage rooftop pirates, predatory psychic business suits, and tacticool kindness cults; in a world where the sun's gone all high contrast, low brightness; in a time where isolation is a synonym for safety ... let's just say the 'Overton Window of Normality' has shifted.

Yep, when the light broke, we all got a bit strange.

All except for Simon, that is.

Simon is perfectly normal. Simon is swell. Simon still stops by Nero's for a coffee in the mornings and the Coffee Mafia *serve him* (I think just out of confusion).

Simon goes into his co-working space three days a week. Sometimes he works on his screenplay. Other times he goes through long-dead databases and de-duplicates records. If you ask him why, he'll just say that he gets tired of working from home all the time and needs a change of scenery.

Simon keeps a spreadsheet to track the good places for salvage in London-in-Darkness. He has different tabs for foodstuffs, fuel, clothes, makeshift weaponry, and a dozen other useful categories. He sorts them according to quality, abundance, known predators, level of contrast corruption, and convenience for his commute. Ask him to show you his v-lookups sometime.

If you haunt the high buildings like I do, then you'll see him sometimes, scuttling about in his scruffy converse, jeans and hoodie. If he sees you see him, he'll wave.

It's not that the various predators, gangs and high-contrast memetic hazards avoid him, exactly. They continue their usual routes; their patterns of search, destroy and throw-a-wobbly. But somehow they just ... miss him. He'll be overlooked or have a miraculous lucky escape. Occasionally, he'll get captured for a few days and spend the time working on his yoga routine, before the next localised burst of spectrum distortion gives him a chance to scarper.

You might be tempted, if you run across him, to join Simon.

You might hear him say things like: "Why don't we pool our resources" or "Let's catch up sometime" or "I've set up a mini golf course in the Tate Modern, if you fancy it" or "Do you want to listen to some Bruno Mars? I think I have one of the last unscratched CDs."

I urge you: do not listen to him.

He means you no ill will. Simon is *normal* and *nice*.

But nice is not kind. Normal is not benevolent. And sometimes, people overlook that the world will hurt those less lucky than them without really thinking about it. And it is *normal* to protect yourself in that way. It is *nice* to gloss over difficult things.

Simon lives a live that is orthogonal to the rest of us. His plane of existence is ever so slightly out of sync.

Yours isn't.

He is a last unchanging remnant of a world that was.

You aren't.

If you meet him, you will want to follow him. His is a world of order and predictability, of self-care days and flexi-time, of secret film screenings and hidden menus in bougie coffee shops. You will be enchanted by the way he talks about getting plenty of natural light, the way he complains about his commute, and how he still tips twelve percent.

But I beg you: do not heed his Simon song. For it is the song of Bruno Mars and you will be dashed on the funk rocks.

Don't go with him, the world that keeps him safe does not exist anymore.

And when I see Simon scuttling through the streets with a new friend, I am sometimes glad that it is gone.

[1dcommunityficrecs]

Rec List: Sports Fics!

Hope everyone has been enjoying the Olympics -- I know I have! There have been amazing performances, emotional records, hilarious memes -- it's truly a unique human experience of community and celebration and accomplishment.

Inspired by that theme, here are some more unique human experiences -- eleven of them! Ranging from under 2000 words to over 100,000 words, fics posted a decade ago (holy smokes) to fics posted just this year, pieces that I know so well they live in my bloodstream to ones I've never heard of and can't wait to try, and even including a rare pair, there's lots of variety as usual, so dig in!

Oh Glory by alivingfire (21027, Explicit, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson) – fic post

This fic follows Harry, a swimmer, and Louis, a gymnast, at the Olympics.

Reccer says: I love the sense of time and place it evokes.

don't have to go to the pool by Kingsoftheimpossible (12245, Explicit, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson)

Harry is new to the swim team, Louis is the captain.

Reccer says: This is an absolutely sexy , adorable, efficient, serotonin-boosting fic.

Whirlwind by Dolce_piccante (21311, Mature, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson)

AU. Acclaimed actor, Hollywood heartthrob, and Oscar nominee, Harry Styles, seems to have the world at his feet, but seeks out an old friend when he needs a date for his big night

Reccer says: It's dolce, so it's sexy, it's funny and there is pining.

The Sidelines by RedRidingStiles (47078, Explicit, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson)

Harry and Louis play hockey for Penn state and can't stand one another, since they can't keep their hatred off the ice their coach and team do what they can to keep their hard earned spot in the playoffs and their two star players from killing each other

Reccer says: The enemies to lovers is done really well, and they're both stupid. It's the perfect combination of interesting plot, comedy, and smut.

Baby Just Dive Right In (Follow My Lead) by LiveLaughLoveLarry (1686, Teen, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson) – fic post

Louis and Harry are partners in synchronized diving. Also in life. They're not intentionally hiding their relationship, but somehow no one seems to pick up on their blatant hints.

Reccer says: It's so funny watching everyone brush off the most unplatonic things as just bros and friends and teammates. Like, I know it's contrived for the sake of the story, but also... it's not that far of a reach!

Get Your Head in the Game by tuxlouis (2007, General, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson)

Harry is on a blind date to a basketball game, and the guy he's supposed to be going with is a TERRIBLE date. Fortunately the cute guy sitting on the other side is a much better conversationalist -- and kisser.

Reccer says: Very sweet, very cute, very funny. Harry's original date is such a hot mess it's hysterical, and Louis is such a little shit but that's what I love about him.

Addicted To Your Fix by sunshinebombx (6312, Teen, Liam Payne/Harry Styles)

Liam injures his shoulder shortly before the French Open. He needs to get back in fighting shape, so he's set up with some yoga therapy. It's very motivating how much he enjoys watching Harry do a downward dog.

Reccer says: Harry's flirting is adorable, and Liam's complete obliviousness to the fact that it's genuine is hilarious. I also love the side-plot about how the media is convinced that Niall and Liam are bitter rivals instead of close friends who get that in sports sometimes you win and sometimes you lose and it's not personal.

Glass Closets and Greenhouses by TiredTiredTz (60933, Explicit, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson) – fic post

Charlton Athletic defender Louis Tomlinson and worldwide sex symbol Harry Styles are rumoured to be hooking up after a viral video filmed at Harry’s Wembley show was posted online by Tommo’s twin sisters.

Reccer says: This is such a great fic! Sweet, sweet meet-cute, witty banter, and actual Tommo-on-the-pitch scenes!

When the Lights Go Out by thelarenttrap (79269, Explicit, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson) – fic post Warnings: Car Crashes

Formula 1 racing drivers Harry and Louis have a history: as childhood competitors, to teammates, to enemies, to eventually lovers.

Hold My Breath by Zarah5 (19749, Mature, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson)

Louis is a footballer. Harry is a yoga teacher. Louis doesn't expect to like yoga, doesn't want to like yoga, but... Harry has a way of making it seem not that bad.

Reccer says: Because it's Zarah5 and with her nothing can be anything but fantastic.

Into The Blue by Zarah5 (117218, Explicit, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson)

Louis is Harry's diving instructor

Reccer says: I honestly think this fic is a classic. A must read. Not to mention it would be a sin

[popatochisssp]

So um I saw the ask about the adopted sibling, so I wanted to ask for the new boys plus love your headcanons

This one, right?

Phew it's been awhile, here goes...

Ash (Undergloom Sans): He’s the absolute best to chill with, whenever you need a calm moment with no expectations on you. He loves talking music with you too, and always keeps his non-existent ears open for stuff he thinks he you might like so he can share it with you later. Be prepared for him to try to convert you to the physical media lifestyle if you’re not already into it, CDs and records and cassettes are the way to go, kiddo!

Yrus (Undergloom Papyrus): You know the joke about grandmas who hear you haven’t eaten and drop everything to rush over and feed you? Well, it’s not really a joke, it’s him, he’ll do it. Not having a home-cooked meal is not an option if he has anything to say about it. Any mention of being hungry or not knowing what you’re going to do for dinner is basically a guarantee that he’s going to be coming by to check on you—either with leftovers in tow, or plans to push past you into your kitchen and get to work.

Brick (Horrorfell Sans): Do you get cold easily? Do you like knitwear? Are you in need of any sweaters or scarves or hats or gloves? Your answer is irrelevant, you’re going to get them, in spades. You also get to share basically anything he’s eating at any time, if you happen to be around, you will get offered a bite or a piece or a sip, whether you ask or not. The sooner you accept your fate, the better.

King (Horrorfell Papyrus): Problems disappear for you. You might not put it together that it’s his doing because he doesn’t go out of his way to draw attention to it, but once you’re in his life, your life starts to feel a bit more charmed. Your stuff hardly ever breaks, you always have what you need when you need it, people are nice to you—and if they’re not, they don’t seem to stay in your orbit long enough for it to matter. He’s a facilitator, and what he wants to facilitate for you is an easy, uncomplicated life. (Just don’t call him on it unless you want to be the annoying little sibling. He is not nice! How dare you imply otherwise... Brat.)

Merc (Horrorswap Sans): He’s a great sounding board for when you don’t know what to do. He doesn’t give advice, per se, but he’s a calm and patient listener, and he has a real knack for guiding you to realize what you want or need. He’s also an open invitation to absolutely anything he’s doing, whether that’s baking or yoga or watching a show. You’re always welcome to join if you want something to do!

Ell (Horrorswap Papyrus): He’s your tech-bro, the guy you bring your stuff to before having to call a professional. He’ll give you a bit of shit for 'breaking' it, what’d you do, what kind of weird sites were you on, huh? But in spite of his grumping, he always does his best to fix your problem and set you up for success later. Just show a little gratitude, pay him in chocolate, or coffee, or watching that horror movie with him that no one else wants to, yeah?

Pitch (Horrrorswapfell Sans): He’s the one you want if you’re looking for a fun time. All that stuff you need to get permission for or no one ever let you do because you’re too young or inexperienced? He’s the one to make it happen—you’ve gotta get the experience somehow, don’t you? He can get you into parties, movies, whatever you want to do, really. He’s definitely gonna be the one to take you for your first tattoo, first piercing, first drink (provided you want any of those, of course)… You only live once and there’s no better time to start than when you’re young and the world is your oyster!

Nemo (Horrorswapfell Papyrus): What’s his is yours. If there’s something he has that you like or want for yourself, go ahead, take it , he doesn’t need it—or if he does, he can get a new one. Clothes, trinkets, food, essentials, if he has it you can help yourself to it, no questions asked. The only thing he cares about is that you're happy and taken care of.

Sunny (Gastertale Sans): Do you need a ride? Will you need a ride? When will you need a ride? He’s there whenever, any time night or day if you gotta get somewhere and don’t want to (or can’t) drive. But hey, if you want to learn how to drive, he’d love to teach you! He’s chill and easygoing so he’s probably the least likely to stress you out while you’re learning…and if you do manage to ding his bumper or scrape the curb a little, hey, it happens, that’s why you’re practicing, y’know?

Aster (Gastertale Papyrus): Documentarian of all your special moments, taking pictures of, for, and with you, recording videos, saving any and all physical scraps of paper with your name or accomplishments listed on them that he can get his hands on. He’s proud of you and all the things you do, of course there ought to be a record of it all—for posterity! …And for him. …And for you, in case you ever forget any of the cool things you’ve done!

Spectr (Transcendtale Sans): He’s just kind of always around. Usually as a hooded figure lurking in the distance, but occasionally falling into step with you when you’re walking somewhere alone, or sliding into the seat beside you on public transit. He’s not always much for conversation but he likes being around if you need him, or at least keeping you from being all the way alone.

PapAIrus (Transcendtale Papyrus): A near-constant source of messages and appearances throughout your day. He’s always happy to entertain you if you want someone to talk to, but especially if you happen to be bored (the horror!). He’s got a knack for knowing when you need a diversion or an amusement and he’s sure to pop up on one screen or another to give it to you when you need him the most.

Xanth (Ascendswap Sans): He loves to shower you in presents pretty much whenever he sees you. Never anything expensive or even necessary, mostly just bizarre little tchotchkes—bracelets, pendants, bobbles and baubles—seemingly random items that ‘had your vibe’ or felt like they’d be ‘on your wavelength.’ Annoyingly enough, he’s never wrong, no matter how weird the gift, it’s always right up your alley and he loves bringing a smile to your face with his random finds.

Piper (Ascendswap Papyrus): If you didn’t want to have your own personal stylist…well sorry, maybe you shouldn’t have gotten adopted by proxy by somebody who wants you to look and feel your best, I guess? He likes to take you shopping for things and offer his advice and opinions, and if you’ll let him, maybe steer you towards a few things here and there that you wouldn’t have thought to try. Don’t worry about the cost of anything, if there’s a deal to be had, he’ll get it one way or another…

Carmine (Underfell Fruition Sans): The best wingman ever, he’s always down to be there for you when you need a little confidence boost, too shy or nervous to do something all by yourself. If you need a hype up before asking someone out, somebody to go to XYZ with so you’re not the odd one out, even just somebody to go see a movie with, the answer’s always the same—sounds great, what time? He’ll never let you down and never leave you hanging.

Tank (Underfell Fruition Papyrus): He's like having a bodyguard whenever you need one. And really, who wouldn’t want to have a big tough guy willing to follow them around and do whatever they want him to do? He’s great at that, being a strong silent presence for you whether you need a little intimidation or just someone to get something off a high shelf for you—y’know, typical scary tall guy stuff. But if you’re looking for some quiet quality time, he’s good for that too, happy to parallel play anytime!

Vi (Swapfell Fruition Sans): He’s good at keeping you on track and making sure all your important documents are in order. He knows your schedule almost down to the minute and tends to text you about anything that might interrupt your routine before it becomes a problem, and you don’t even have to ask him to take a look at your financials or help you with taxes—he’s already combed through the figures and pounced on every little discrepancy and rounding error he could find. You’re welcome, by the way.

Hunter (Swapfell Fruition Papyrus): You don’t get out enough. You’re coming out with him. Yes, outside. No, you don’t have a choice, he’ll drag you if you don’t go willingly, being inside 24/7 is terrible for you he would know. Don’t worry, it won’t be so bad, he can probably find you something cool to see, some animal tracks or a neat plant, maybe a stream. He’ll make sure you get back home in one piece and everything too, alive even, maybe. He just wants to share a little time and fresh air with you, and being cooped up indoors all the time is no fun, even if you’re used to it.

Kohl (Descendtale Sans): He…hassles you. He sneaks up on you when your guard is down, shows up in unexpected places to spook you, makes jokes at your expense… It’s nothing worse than teasing, really, and compared to how he is with most everyone else, his pestering tends to read as playful more than anything else. Still, if you’re looking for a sweet, helpful big brother…look elsewhere. He’s the bastard big brother that you’ve begrudgingly grown fond of, and you’re the irritating little sib that he’s forced to admit is growing on him, a little…much like a fungus might.

Bram (Descendtale Papyrus): He calls at least once a day if he doesn’t see you, and sometimes even then. He’s always trying to check in on you to see if you need anything, make sure you’re doing alright, and oh, of course if you’d like to do anything today, or maybe later in the week? It may be a little a lot overeager of him, but he cares about you and doesn’t ever want to lose touch! So please text him back so he knows you got home safe, he’ll worry if you’re radio silent too long!

[theficpusher]

My Little Poet by Thingssicant | G | 1861 Louis is a librarian and someone keeps ruining his books

don't be shy, i'm your guy by winterPearls | nr | 4658 "...Harry wondered if this pixie of a boy with crinkles by his long lashed eyes had a personality as addictive and loud as his laugh that reverberated around the otherwise silent library..." or AU where Harry is a cute librarian that really likes one of the boys that is a regular and he just wants to talk to him but he's shy and it's cute honestly i just suck at summarizing

Just Jump by jaerie | E | 9748 Finally, after years of suffering alone, the insurance plan at Harry's new job covered omega heat services. As a grown omega adult, it finally felt like the right time to try it out. And, since taking an entire week of heat leave would really put him behind at work, using a service to shorten it seemed like a responsible decision. At least that’s how he rationalized it. He was nervous about his decision but it was too late. The doorbell rang. “Hi!” The alpha said again and Harry took the hand he offered and shook it firmly. “I’m Louis from Omega Services. It’s nice to meet you.”

Record Your Fate (and Write Me In) by LadyLondonderry | T | 13012 Harry is the Archivist, it's his job to record what happens in the universe. He's only a few days into the job when things take an odd turn. Suddenly, the small blue eyed boy seems more important than writing about crowning dignitaries.

If the Surface Begs You Home by QuickedWeen | T | 17752 Harry is a mermaid from the underwater kingdom of Mercadia who is a little too fascinated by life above the surface. He's kicked out of his home after he winds up pregnant, and has to figure out how to make his way in the world. Louis is the darling of the small neighbouring seaside village who came home after university to take over their local library, and can't seem to stay away from the mysterious pregnant mermaid his friends introduce him to.

Checking Them Out?: How To Use Your Library Science Degree To Get an Alpha by InsightfulInsomniac | E | 19965 When a flirty, attractive alpha patron checks out an entire shelf of literature on omega behavior and omega rights, Harry can’t help but wonder why the man is so interested — is he a really attentive partner, or is he just a creep? It doesn’t help that this alpha visits weekly to exchange his books… and that he smells absolutely divine. Whether he likes it or not, Harry has a crush.

The Library Universe [Series] by allwaswell16 | E | 33825 Harry Styles has a great life. He’s a children’s librarian at the New York Public Library, he’s got wonderful friends, and he loves cooking, green tea, yoga, and his collection of bow ties. He doesn’t mind that his life seems a little structured, maybe even a little boring. But when Louis Tomlinson joins the library staff as the new Installation Coordinator, things become a lot less predictable. Louis gets under his skin right from the start, bossing Harry around, making noise during story time, and eating the last cupcake in the staff lounge. Louis may be almost offensively attractive, but Harry will not be succumbing to Louis Tomlinson’s charms, even if the rest of the library staff have.

i was yours (i wish you were mine) by staybeautiful | E | 56283 “Harry Styles!” His name rang out clear through the city streets. He turned quickly back to the bar, startled by his own name and startled by the voice that called him. Standing in the doorway to the bar, back lit and glowing slightly was Louis. Not an eighteen year old apparition dressed in the same low slung blue jeans and t-shirt with swooping bangs that was always the image in his mind. No, he was Louis now. or Ten years ago Harry dropped his best friend and high school boyfriend off at the train station and never saw him again. Now, he's twenty seven, living in NYC, and dreadfully unlucky in love. He can't stop wistfully thinking of Louis promising that they'd see each other again in ten years time. A chance meeting outside a bar has them tumbling head first into a summer of music, milkshakes, and maybe each other.

Through Eerie Chaos by MediaWhore | G | 102104 For as long as anyone can remember, Old Hillsbridge Manor has always been believed to be haunted. Everyone in the village agrees and keeps a respectful, fearful, distance. New in town after a bad breakup and an internship that led to disappointment rather than a permanent job, Harry Styles figures taking pictures of the decrepit building could be a great new creative project. Or at least a much-needed distraction while he searches for a job and crashes at his parents’ new house. No one warned him about the apparitions though; about the music, the laughter, the people who flicker and vanish when you call after them, the echoes of a past that should be long gone… Harry has never believed in spirits but even he can admit that there’s something weird going on. What starts as mere curiosity evolves into a full-blown investigation and soon enough, Harry finds himself making friends with an aristocrat from the 1920s and struggling with finding the best way to tell him that he’s dead. The Ghost Hunter AU where Niall lives to prove ghosts are real, Zayn is a skeptical librarian and Harry gets caught up in a century-old mystery and catches feeling in the process.

[theanticool]

Libraries and Adult Lonliness

As we all know, making friends as adults is hard. And while the internet has made it easier to make friends with people around the world, actually meeting people you can meet with on a regular basis and just hang out with us tough. The common answer to meeting new people is to find people who are interested in the same stuff as you. As such, finding places to meet new people who may have similar interests to you is important. And that’s why I think the library is a great resource!

As a children’s librarian, one of the things I try to point out to parents when they come in to sign their kids up for the library is that we offer adult programs too. Obviously we have book clubs - my library has 4 different book clubs for people who read different types of books. I’ve posted about it before with knitting/crochet circles. But for people who have or want to explore different interests, and meet new people via that new interest, you may want to check your local library to see their programming. For example:

Hiking: Many libraries offer things like hiking kits. These can be things such as maps for local trails, hiking sticks, a water resistant backpack, binoculars, bird guides, and the like. But some libraries having hiking clubs, such as the Poughkeepsie Public Library Distruct in NY.

Language Learning: Many libraries have access to language learning platforms such as Rosetta Stone or Mango Languages. But many other have dedicated classes where adults can come and learn languages. If you’re in L.A. county, the public library offers classes in beginner Russian, Chinese, Korean, Italian, Armenian, etc!

Music: there are many libraries that have maker spaces where you can go and record music. There’s one in the Newark Library and at a branch of the Brooklyn library. There are also ones that allow you to check out instruments. But there are also ones where you can receive free music lessons, such as the Dallas Public Library (this program was online during the pandemic but is now also offered in person!)

I could keep going.

Singing, dancing, theater, yoga, sketch comedy, creative writing, RC Cars, foraging, cemetery tour groups, jewelry making, baking, woodworking, painting, etc. If you have a niche interest or would like to get into a niche interest, there is a chance your library has had or will have a program about it. And if you’re looking to meet new people, it is a great place to start.

[nosferatini]

The Sound of Lyrics

A Belated Fluff Fest musical comedy fic for @sohoscribblers !

4.1k words - And not a trigger in sight.

🎧Recommended listening: Sound of Lyrics Soundcloud Playlist

Summary:

Crowley and Aziraphale are surprised to find the Metatron in the bookshop one fine Friday morning, but things proceed a little differently than the original Ineffable Plan. The angels depart, leaving Crowley anxious to get back to the flat and Aziraphale anxious to get back to his music.

Crowley might have been a little disappointed that they hadn’t wound up doing drunken breakfast at the Ritz, but he rather fancied emptying his plants and moving back in.

Nina and Maggie might have spoken to Aziraphale about the whole “talking” thing, but they found the bookshop quite decidedly locked.

So, they’re still not talking, per se. But perhaps, with the right persuasion… they will sing.

Excerpt:

Aziraphale eyed the record player over the rims of his spectacles. It was skipping; which would be nothing, if he weren’t an angel whose divine presence precluded such an occurrence. His records never skipped. Not since the invention of records.

He left the glasses at the desk and stepped toward the table. He stood there, doing his best at menace, yet his uncharacteristic scowl did nothing to deter it.

“What’s gotten into you?” he asked, as if the record had an excuse.

The golden hue of the bookshop flickered in time with the scratching repetitions of that single, unflattering note of Schubert’s Symphony No. 5.

“Oh, for goodness sake,” he tutted, rolling his eyes. “Crowley, did you hex the record player?”

Now, the skipping seemed to become… musical. Aziraphale stared in fascination as the scratches became notes and the repetitions took on a rhythm of their own. Crowley was certainly to blame. The record now sounded decidedly bebop, if ever he’d heard it (he hadn’t). So he made his way back to the vintage telephone at his desk.

Crowley would simply have to come by and fix it. What a shame. Aziraphale tempered his smile, pouting as he wrapped a hand around the receiver and ignoring the song in the background.

“I was tired of my lady, we’d been together too long; Like a worn out recording, of a favorite song…”

But as angelic fingers dialed—sliding along the pathways to a number known by rote—the angel’s foot began to tap to the beat. He felt a sudden urge to read the paper. And as he gazed at the one on his desk, the letters of the headline began to shift in parody of the record’s playful masculine voice…

“…If you like Pina Coladas, and getting caught in the rain; If you're not into yoga, if you have half a brain…”

Aziraphale stared, dumbstruck; slowly reasoning that the editors of The Times hadn’t decided to go tabloid with their paper. This was far more elaborate than Crowley’s usual schemes, and Aziraphale now desperately wished to talk to the demon. In fact, the more he thought about it, the greater his desire to speak… no… to sing, for Crowley.

He could feel the lyrics behind his teeth. His hand grew clammy around the receiver as he bit lips together to withhold the words like a failing dam, when Crowley’s voice drawled:

“…do it with style…”

Continue Reading on AO3

Special thanks to my betas: @finlands-world , @the-literal-kj , @playdohangel and @goodomensafterdark for the support of my guild friends :)

[bustybounty]

You try to surprise your boyfriend by taking BE pills but he surprises you first by thinking they're aspirin and taking a few pills every day for a few weeks.

And they're a lot more effective on him than they've been on you.

I absolutely love this idea~

I've been taking double the amount he has, because I really want to grow more, to the point I've surpassed even the biggest women in the world. To the point I'm a living world record, I've got the fattest, perkiest, softest, best tits a woman could have, and I'm still trying to grow... They're bigger than yoga balls and I want more.

I want to show him my gains.

Yet when I meet back with him after those weeks have passed, for a vacation together, I am instantly pinned against the wall by... one of his gigantic boobs.

To say they're more effective would be understating the fact his boy tits could crush TRUCKS and they're audibly sloshing and somehow growing even more.

He talks about how he accidentally took these BE pills thinking they were aspirins, and was surprised by the effect, but loved it.

He asks me if I want to see him take an entire bottle of pills in one go to see what'd happen.

Am I jealous? Yes. Am I so deep indulging in the craziest, most mind blowing arousal I've ever experienced, that it beats out any other possible feeling a million times over? Also very much yes.

So my answer to him is obvious, and soon, I'm no longer pinned against the wall. I'm kissing him, between his gigantic sea of boy boobage, as the house and city are turned into rubble by his growing size. I even take a whole bottle myself just to try to get to room sized tits - but nothing compared to his moon sized breasts now.

I wonder why the pills were more effective on him. But I don't care ultimately...I just wish I knew where to find more of these pills~

<3

[balladofsallyrose]

Dennis Hopper's collection of owned and gifted books (a few are listed under the cut)

Islands in the Stream (Charles Scribner's Sons, 1970)

Magic (Delacorte Press, 1976)

Sneaky People (Simon and Schuster, 1975)

Strange Peaches (Harper's Magazine Press, 1972)

I Didn't Know I Would Live So Long (Charles Scribner's Sons, 1973)

Baby Breakdown (The Bobbs-Merrill Company, Inc., 1970)

37 (Holt, Rinehart and Winston, 1970)

Presences: A Text for Marisol (Charles Scribner's Sons, 1970)

Little Prayers for Little Lips, The Book of Tao, The Bhagavadgita or The Song Divine, and Gems and Their Occult Power.

Lolita (G.P. Putnam's Sons, 1955)

The Dramas of Kansas (John F. Higgins, 1915)

Joy of Cooking (The Bobbs-Merrill Company, 1974) 

The Neurotic: His Inner and Outer Worlds (First edition, Citadel Press, 1954)

Out of My Mind: An Autobiography (Harry N. Abrams, Inc., 1997)

The Savage Mind (University of Chicago Press, 1966)

Alive: The Story of the Andes Survivors (J.B. Lippincott Company, 1974)

The Documents of 20th Century Art: Dialogues with Marcel Duchamp (Viking Press, 1971)

The Portable Dorothy Parker, A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man, I Ching, and How to Make Love to a Man.

John Steinbeck's East of Eden (Bantam, 1962)

James Dean: The Mutant King (Straight Arrow Books, 1974) by David Dalton

The Moviegoer (The Noonday Press, 1971)

 Erections, Ejaculations, Exhibitions and General Tales of Ordinary Madness (City Light Books, 1974)

Narcotics Nature's Dangerous Gifts (A Delta Book, 1973)

The Egyptian Book of the Dead (Dover Publications, 1967)

Tibetan Yoga and Secret Doctrines (Oxford University Press, 1969)

Junky (Penguin Books, 1977) by William S. Burroughs

Weed: Adventures of a Dope Smuggler (Harper & Row, 1974)

Alcoholics Anonymous (Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, 1976)

Skrebneski Portraits - A Matter of Record, Sketchbooks of Paolo Soleri, and High Tide.

Raw Notes (The Press of the Nova Scotia College of Art and Design, 2005)

Le Corbusier (Heidi Weber, 1965)

Henry Moore in America (Praeger Publishers, 1973)

Claes Oldenburg (MIT Press, 2012)

Notebooks 1959 1971 (MIT Press, 1972)

A Day in the Country (Los Angeles County Museum of Art, 1985)

Album Celine (Gallimard, 1977)

A Selection of Fifity Works From the Collection of Robert C. Scull (Sotheby Parke Bernet, Inc. 1973)

Collage A Complete Guide for Artists (Watsun-Guptill Publications, 1970)

The Fifties Aspects of Painting in New York (Smithsonian Institution Press, 1980)

A Bottle of Notes and Some Voyages (Rizzoli International Publications, 1988)

All Color Book of Art Nouveau (Octopus Books, 1974)

A Colorslide Tour of The Louvre Paris (Panorama, 1960)

Dear Dead Days (G. P. Putnam's Sons, 1959)

Woman (Aidan Ellis Publishing Limited, 1972)

The Arts and Man ( UNESCO, 1969)

Murals From the Han to the Tang (Foreign Languages Press, 1974)

A (Grove Press Inc., 1968)

Andy Warhol's Index Book (Random House, 1967)

Voices (A Big Table Book, 1969)

Another Country (A Dell Book, circa 1960s)

On The Road (Signet, circa 1980s) 

[quinnlarrabee]

Palo santo 101

Before you click play on the audio recording and blithely ignore the written guide, be sure to review the important science-based charts and insight-rich visuals sprinkled throughout it.

If you’ve ever walked into a party hosted by someone under 40 in Brooklyn, Lisbon, California, Condesa or Roma Norte, or Venice Beach and not smelled palo santo, then you probably had covid. Over the past decade palo santo has become the official scent of good vibes. It is an olfactory assurance for anyone who recognizes the scent that conversation will be limited to polyamory, regional burns, and adaptogen supplements. Despite the fact that no one ever doesn’t want to smell palo santo, it’s important to know when to use it and when to relegate your surroundings to their default odor. This guide will ensure that you know exactly how to make the most of the palo santo you carry in the shoulder bag you purchased at the Sant Jordi flea market in Ibiza during the off-season.

Like most cultural appropriations, no one who burns palo santo knows what it is, where it came from, why they use it, or why it’s even called palo santo. Let’s uncover the facts. 

Bursera Graveolens is a tree native to the dry tropical forests of South America. Its discovery by white people dates back to 1972 at a now defunct swingers resort in Quito, Ecuador, where a guest from New Jersey named Paulo Santonicola noticed a stick with a burning ember on the end of giving off a fetid, wispy trail of smoke. He pointed at the burning stick and asked the guy holding the cocaine tray, who would now be called a consent educator, “por que?”

“Plaga,” he replied, and gnashed his teeth and made a flapping-wing motion with the hand not holding the cocaine tray. Paulo brought the wood back to his central New Jersey home as a last-ditch effort to ward off the deer that were eating the tomatoes in his garden. He started burning the wood around the clock in the steamy summer of 1972, during which he and his girlfriend hosted dozens of play parties. 

“I didn’t care if people at my parties had a problem with the smell,” recounted Paulo. “Those frickin’ deer were jumping my fence and chewing through wire to eat my tomatoes. When I caught a whiff of that wood down in Quito, I thought, ‘they won’t come near my garden if I burn this shit.’” 

Mr. Santonicola had achieved some level of notoriety in the adult film industry in the early 1970s, and his parties were well attended by neo-hippies, the disco elite and the first generation of yoga professionals. Over the course of the summer, a pavlovian association formed between the scent of the wood and casual sex, and his friends started asking him for sticks so that they could take the vibe home with them. At the sunset of his porn career, he saw an opportunity not only to rebrand his legacy, distancing himself from grainy adult films with problematic titles, but also to make oceans of cash: import the wood and sell it through his readymade network of yoga instructors under his stage name, Palo Santo. 

Palo santo’s ubiquity today grew from its two foundational use cases: repelling pests and masking the odor of too many naked bodies in poorly ventilated New Jersey basements. Palo santo is still used today as a repellent of sorts to ward off bad vibes and people who do not use the word vibe in place of most nouns at the end of a question, such as scene, weather, temperature, culture, menu, rules, culture, law, opinion, suggested attire, relationship status, sexual proclivity, net worth and so on. It is also still used during group sex, but only when the group sex is intentional and/or ceremonial. There are many other ways, however, that you can improve the vibes of the world through the smoke of this wood, which was recently added to IUCN’s Red List of “near threatened” species, making it even more important to burn palo santo as a way of calling attention to its growing scarcity. 

Airplanes 

For a brief, blissful period during the pandemic, the only people who traveled were intrepid hipsters who had already contracted the virus and been instrumental in scaling it to global significance through music festivals, long-distance polycules and global nomadism. Commercial airlines from the spring of 2020 through the summer of 2021 were basically private air travel for people who know to always ask if party buffet chocolate is psycho-active. Air travel today is a much lower vibration experience, and it’s important that assertive restorative steps be taken by conscious travelers to make flying chill again. Hanging a dreamcatcher from the back of the seat in front of you and burning palo santo on the tray table is a great way of making a public flight experience feel more private. Be sure to light your palo santo only after the aircraft reaches cruising altitude, because tray tables must be stowed until then. 

Other people’s parties

Not everyone with whom you may socialize is aware of how critical palo santo is to creating and maintaining a vibe. Some less experienced hosts try to make do with incense from India, Japan or other countries that have been annexed by Brooklyn or with candles from La Labo, and it may be up to you to rescue the vibe. Back when people consumed alcohol, bringing a nice bottle of wine was a way of showing a host your appreciation, but these days bringing palo santo, immediately lighting it and waving the stick around like Harry Potter on quaaludes is the optimal way of saying thank-you to someone who has invited you into their home.  

Hospitals

While palo santo has not been proven by any form of science to deliver the healing benefits touted by people who sell or use palo santo, be assured that it does all of the things people say it does. Burning palo santo creates smoke, and smoke is pretty to watch and - like cardiovascular exercise - creates a healthy challenge for your lungs. Medical facilities are places where people go to heal, and bringing palo santo to visit a recovering friend is a beautiful contribution to not only their journey back to health but also the recovery of every patient within a twenty to fifty foot radius. 

Conscious uncoupling ceremonies

Modifying your relationship trajectory in a direction that disappoints the person you are with might seem like a low vibe experience, but you can make it a high vibe experience by burning palo santo. While explaining that the rules that you set last week for your ENM pairing have become too confining, burning palo santo will deflect negative reactions and in some cases even seduce your partner into being amenable to a situationship that has absolutely no structure, rules or expectations. This can add to your sexual abundance and also serve as a pillar in your temple of confidence that helps you acquire new lovers at floor parties. If, rather than just undefining the relationship, you are certain there is no future with the person to whom you have exposed particles of burning wood, palo santo will prevent your ex-partner from making an opposing case or lingering too long after you have had uncoupling sex. 

During sex with someone you don’t want to fall in love with you

In a rare moment of cultural relevance, Science has proven that pheromones strengthen the bonds of attraction between two or many more people during sexual activity. Sometimes, though, it is undesirable to strengthen bonds with a sex partner. Sometimes, it is optimal to maintain a totally impartial, unattached, stoic distance between the person who you are inside / is inside of you, given that attraction can lead to unintended expectations. Burning palo santo is an excellent way of muting the potency of pheromones, leveling the olfactory playing field and creating a piney through-line for all the people participating in a sexual experience. 

Any kind of intentional wellness space

Because the smell of palo santo is so potent and distracting, burning it during intentional experiences (e.g. yoga, journaling, meditation, tantra classes, tantric sex, facials or any kind of PRP therapy) compels participants to step up their intention-setting efforts. It forces deep focus and concentration, kind of like how the deafening emo whines of RY X at a RY X concert force you to lean in, cock your head and make that weird squinty-eyed, mouth-agape listening face to be able to hear the unsolicited story of how literally anyone you happen to be standing next to was in an intentional polyamorous relationship with RY X.

Ancient actually sacred genuinely authentic real cultural events that were not invented by white people to extract money from other white people

Many people who attend Burning Man have begun to explore other intentional gatherings outside of Nevada that don’t involve metallic gold body paint. Some of these gatherings are thousands of years old and are led by people who have trained their entire lives to uphold traditions that have been passed down for generations within their culture. Particularly if a gathering takes place in its country of origin (rather than being exported, diluted and branded, like an ethnic fast food franchise), you may encounter native smells that don’t smell like palo santo. In these cases, it is not only permissible but even advisable to add palo santo to everyone’s experience, which you have probably been very reluctantly allowed to attend. Burning palo santo will communicate to the religious or cultural leaders of the gathering that you are on their level and (despite having never read anything about the gathering other than first few words of the top Google result you saw while standing on the Premier Access line into your Delta flight at JFK / LAX / SFO) have a deep respect for whatever they are chanting in a language that you cannot understand while you record the most intensely sacred moments for the Instagram story that you will post at the appropriate time in your home time zone so that everyone will know that you are an internationally intentionally spiritual person who gets access to authentic cultural events. 

Despite its countless unproven benefits and its universal appeal within a very small circle, there are certain times when palo santo should not be burned. Palo santo can trigger flashbacks for people who first encountered the scent of it during acid trips. If someone walks into your container, smells the palo santo you’re burning and begins behaving erratically, just ask them to immediately return to their own container, lest they harsh the vibe you’re cultivating. The only other times that do not call for burning palo santo are when you’re alone, and no one else will see you lighting the stick and waving it around the room, bringing it within inches of everyone’s face whether they’ve invited it or not, while making awkwardly long eye contact with them, nothing but the winding trail of smoke in front of your your vulnerable gaze, thus communicating to them that you are a spiritually endowed person and care deeply about them knowing that you are a spiritually endowed person. So, a helpful rule of thumb is this: as with masturbation, you should always and only be burning palo santo when someone is watching, otherwise what’s the point.

[to-my-dearest-ana]

Things to do instead of eating

listen to music

finish that book you were reading

sketch/draw/color

play animal crossings

look at tumblr

look at pinterest

watch tv shows

make stickers

daydream about how things will be when you reach your ugw

write in a journal

shop

clean your room

organize your space

color code your closet/organize your drawer

check your grades/do homework

yoga/pilates

play with your pet

make a workout routine

make a meal plan

make jewelry

play computer games

watch mukbangs

do laundry :')

write a poem

try a new hobby (pottery, sports, journaling etc)

look at world records

visit The Useless Web

play buzzfeed quizzes

try a personality test

scroll reddit

learn a new language

watch cleaning videos

clean behind your fridge

make slime

go for a walk

listen to a podcast (i recommend busy yet pretty)

make a shopping list

HIIT workout (may make you hungrier)

[femmefatalevibe]

Femme Fatale Playbook: How To Cultivate Self-Regard (In Every Area Of Life)

How to live with self-respect in every aspect of life. Here's your ultimate guide to living in your dark feminine energy.

Living with self-regard (or self-respect) means understanding that you cannot pour from an empty cup and the importance of making yourself your #1 priority. Feeling your best also has a domino effect. You become a better friend, boss, sibling, parent, child, lover, etc. when you feel comfortable with yourself and content in your own skin. Of course, some of these practices will apply to more than one area of life (ex. Sleep improves your physical and mental health and a good night’s rest can also be considered an act of self-care), but these principles/examples are divided up to streamline these tips. Enjoy xx 

Areas of Life: 

Career

Self-Care/Self-Development 

Finances

Physical Health 

Mental Health/Emotional Well-Being 

Sexual Health/Sexuality & Sensuality 

Relationships (All Types - Friends, Family, Work, Intimate) 

Career: 

Discover what you love: Find the subject matters, industries, and a way of adding value that lights you up inside. Take a job or get creative in your methodology to make this area of interest into your career.

Set clear goals: Do I want to work at a particular company? What position/title? Do I want to go out on my own – who are my dream clients, work volume, lifestyle, business structure, income? Write all these details down and strategize small, practical daily tasks/habits to reach your goal.

Build an indispensable skillset: Research, case-building, copywriting, strategic planning, computer programming, sales, data analytics, etc. Learn transferable skills to guarantee you'll always have something valuable to bring to the table in our ever-changing world/work culture. Start with one and accumulate more as you work towards self-mastery.

Know your worth: Negotiate – your salary, rates, workday structure, corporate benefits, PTO, etc. Never let someone have you begging for breadcrumbs or the bare minimum.

Speak up (when necessary): Communicate – clearly, directly, and assertively. Don't let someone walk all over you. Finish your sentences with certainty even if someone tries to interrupt you while you're speaking. Advocate for yourself, whether you're trying to secure a promotion, a new project, a proposed solution for a client, or taking a necessary break. Also, know when it's in your best interest to stay silent. Ensure your integrity remains intact. The truth of a matter speaks volumes.

Organize your day (Prioritize!): Set yourself up to win by outlining your priorities first before others' tasks and projects consume your mind and calendar. List your top 3 to-dos for the day that are non-negotiables for you and will inch you closer to your goals. I recommend the Productivity Planner for daily use.

Keep records: Have email records and call notes regarding every interaction and decision written down. This practice enables you to stand your ground when necessary and saves you a lot of trouble.

Set boundaries: Proudly affirm your 'no' to a project, any disrespectful comment, or too many nights of overtime work. Schedule and stick to your breaks and the time you clock out (within reason, of course). Never allow a company or endeavor to run you into the ground at the expense of your mental or physical health.

Make connections: Cultivating a network of mentors, colleagues, and peers in the same or adjacent fields is priceless. These connections can lead to new opportunities, provide a healthy and productive space to explore ideas, or generally vent and exchange advice. Strike up that conversation at lunch or an event. Follow up with a LinkedIn request or thoughtful email. You never know what this conversation might lead to and the opportunities it can bring.

Self-Care/Self-Development: 

Create daily/weekly rituals: Establish ones that add a little joy and streamline your day. These habits can range from a 10-minute yoga or meditation session every morning, to practicing morning pages or a daily shadow work prompt, reading 10 pages daily, getting your steps in, and planning your tasks, lunch, and outfit for the next day the night before to creating a weekly house-cleaning schedule or meal planning. Discover systems that allow you to put yourself first and set you up to win the day.

Find ways to feel beautiful: Create luscious skincare, shower, and hair/makeup/nail routines that make you feel like a queen. Invest in well-fitting, high-quality wardrobe staples. Make your favorite cup of coffee or tea daily. Keep your signature scent on hand. Exfoliate. Invest in matching pajama sets.

Indulge all of your senses: Light a candle. Put on a moody playlist to relax, focus, unwind, or turn you on – any melody that suits the occasion and gets you in the zone. Take a bubble bath or do a face mask. Relish in a warm beverage or a healthful, comforting meal. Use silk pillowcases, hair ties, and bed sheets. Pamper yourself with small everyday luxuries.

Expand your knowledge: Make it a priority to read a few articles and 10 pages of a book daily. Being educated on different topics and the world provides you with personal fulfillment and enables you to enter into a wider pool of conversations. This practice also strengthens your mind, sharpens focus, and helps your brain relax.

Explore your interests: Learn what subjects and activities light you up inside. Whether it's painting, dancing, tennis, spin classes, learning about ancient world history, politics, fashion, science, etc. Take time to study and practice in these areas of interest.

Embrace your creative side: Write, read, draw, create a mood board, explore Pinterest or Tumblr, style outfits, organize a section of your room, cook a new recipe, make a playlist – any fun activity that ignites creativity.

Plan dates for yourself: Take yourself out for coffee, lunch, a shopping date, or even a mini vacation. You deserve to enjoy experiences and derive pleasure from enjoying these life moments without worrying about anyone but yourself.

Remember to rest: Getting 7-8 hours of sleep nightly and taking breaks is essential for productivity and overall well-being. Never feel guilty for allowing your body and mind to recover. Neglecting rest only backfires if you're playing the long-term game.

Finances: 

Know your income/expense ratio: Ensure you know exactly how much money is coming in and going out every month. Create a personal balance sheet to audit your financial well-being.

Track everything: Keep a record of every stream of income and where every dollar is going – expenses, savings, estimated taxes, investments, charity, etc.

Have a set emergency fund: Between 3-12 months of expenses should be ready in a high-yield savings account at all times. If you have a family or are self-employed, aim for 6-12 months of necessary savings to stay sane. Saving this amount of money takes time. Be patient, and cut back on frivolous expenses if needed for the short term. It's an act of self-care.

Invest (especially in a Roth IRA or backdoor Roth IRA): Set one up through Vanguard or Fidelity ASAP if you have not already. Don't underestimate the importance of compound interest on your financial future and security.

Automatically pay yourself first: Automate a portion of your paycheck to savings and your investments, so you never see this money. Pay yourself first before spending (on anything but necessities).

Always max out your 401K employer-matching: Make sure you know what percentage your employer will match and always meet this investment requirement. Do yourself the favor. It's literally free money.

Only spend on your essentials & what you actually enjoy: Invest in pleasurable items and activities strategically. Only spend on additional experiences and products that add value to your life. Cut unfulfilling expenses.

Read about personal finance/speak with your brokerage firm: Take time to read about these topics and learn everything your parents didn't teach you or were not taught at school. Use licensed professionals (CPAs, brokerage firms, etc.) as a resource, too, for your personal goals.  

Use savings plug-ins/discount codes 

Physical Health: 

Cook/eat healthy meals: At least 80% of the time. Focus on eating whole foods and a (mainly) plant-based diet. I've been vegan for 10 years and it's done wonders for my body, skin, and mental clarity.

Drink plenty of water daily: Set a target of ounces = to your weight in pounds. Incorporate lemon, lime, orange wedges, or frozen berries if necessary to keep this habit interesting.

Find workouts you love: Whether that's low-impact like pilates, yoga, walking or dance classes, spin classes, weight-lifting, etc. The best exercise routine is the one you can gladly maintain.

Make daily movement a priority: At least 15-30 minutes daily. I aim for 10-12K steps at least 5 days a week.

Limit processed foods, alcohol, cigarettes 

Step outside: Get at least 10 minutes of sun daily, weather permitting. Always wear sunscreen.

Sleep Well: Aim for 7-8 hours (Create a sleep hygiene routine!)

Maintain proper hygiene: Shower daily, moisturize, wash your hair on your necessary schedule, brush your body from head to toe, etc.

Do pelvic floor exercises: It does wonders for your bladder and helps to satisfy your libidinal energy.

Go to your annual appointments: Primary doctor/Obgyn/Dentist/Dermatologist

Mental Health/Emotional Well-Being: 

Meditate: Some of my favorite ones are linked HERE (for anxiety), HERE, (focus/productivity), and HERE (feminine/sexual energy).

Journal: Do a daily shadow work prompt, gratitude journal exercise, or practice morning pages (stream of consciousness journaling for 3 pages every morning).

Read: 10 pages of a self-development/psychology book, at least 3-5 articles, or a chapter of a fiction or non-fiction book. Daily.

Take breaks: A 10-minute walk, a real lunch break, listening to music, making coffee. Something pleasurable to recenter your focus and energy.

Discover movement you love: Walking and dancing are your best friends.

Keep your space clean: Wipe off all surfaces and put things away daily. Keep your desk organized. Clean and put away the dishes before bed. Stick to a house cleaning schedule.

Make to-do/bullet-point lists: For every area of life – work, chores, groceries, other items you need, wishlists, activities, and hobbies you want to pursue

Schedule and plan out your week: House cleaning, laundry, work project management, email time blocking, appointments, beauty routines, workouts, etc.

Create non-negotiables: Sleep, daily walks, a healthy dinner, your skincare routine, a 15-minute shower – whatever must-do rituals you need to look and feel your best every day.

Connect with your inner circle: Make a deliberate effort to stay in touch and catch up with those who are loyal and have your best interest at heart. Make time to chat on the phone, send a text, or better yet –get coffee, lunch, drinks, or dinner weekly with at least one person who you know makes your life richer in some type of way.

Put restrictions on social media/screen time: Use your settings to limit your time on certain apps (Instagram, Twitter, Tik Tok, Facebook, etc.). I set mine for 2 hours a day. Stop checking email right before bed and first thing in the morning (at least try really hard not to –I'm so guilty of this one!).

Give freely: Be generous with those who you love, mentors, and mentees. Everyone appreciates when you put a little effort into giving someone a small thoughtful gift, doing a kind gesture, or lending an ear. It makes you feel good and can make someone's day, week, month, or year.

Set boundaries: Take time for yourself – to recharge, indulge in solo activities, have some fresh air, breathe, or sit in silence. Give freely with no expectations, but never overextend yourself. When seeking to know whether you're striking the right balance between giving and gatekeeping your energy ask yourself: Am I being kind, or do I feel like I'm losing a piece of myself when engaging with this person/attending this event? Be honest with yourself. Listen to and follow your initial gut reaction.

Go to therapy: If you can afford it, weekly (or bi-weekly, monthly) sessions are a game-changer for self-discovery, emotional regulation, and general happiness/life fulfillment.

Sexual Health/Sexuality & Sensuality:

Let go of shame: Internalize your right to pleasure. Claim ownership over this aspect of your life. It gives you confidence in and outside of the bedroom, so you move through the world with a magnetic aura and powerfully feminine energy.

Own your sexuality and preferences: Embrace who and what you're attracted to. This principle extends from your sexual orientation to your libido, turn-ons (fantasies, adult content, steamy memories, etc.), preferred positions, kinks, and devices. Sexuality and arousal are so personal. Allow yourself to be free of stigmas for the things you do in private. No one needs to know how you derive pleasure behind closed doors (unless it's a partner who's involved, of course).

Make time for self-pleasure and exploration (at least weekly): Understanding that you're in control of your own pleasure is empowering. Learning what you like is essential for sexual gratification – whether you're alone or sharing the experience with a partner.

Allow the mind-body connection to be your friend, not your enemy: Sex starts in the mind, so this point is important for climaxing. Get out of your head and into your body. Learning to enjoy your own body is a sign of self-respect.

Keep everything clean & hygienic: Only wash inside with water (no steaming!), clean any toys, and use protection. Safety and self-regard go hand-in-hand.

Find products & habits that make you feel beautiful: Invest in lingerie, sheets, perfume, body lotions, candles, wine, etc. that make you feel confident while in the mood.

Engage in playful & creative activities: Don't be shy about (safe and consensual) experimentation (I'll leave this to your imagination) and activities to build up tension, like a romantic dinner or a dancing session beforehand to make this area of your life more exciting and fulfilling.

Relationships: 

Communicate expectations: Clearly and often with any individual in your life. Listen and respond. Don't react. Validate emotions when necessary. If someone cannot do the same, understand that it's almost always a sign of projection. Remain calm and confident in yourself. Always command and show up to others with the highest level of respect.

Have empathy, but not at your own expense: Live with respect and consideration for others, but remember your life is for YOU. Beware of guilt-trippers. Don't take the bait.

Set boundaries: Uphold them unapologetically. Seek to understand others' needs and boundaries, so you can be considerate of their needs too. Empathy and kindness come from a place of self-respect. They are not the same people-pleasing.

Be generous (but don’t overextend yourself): See above in the mental health section.

Be true to yourself: Authenticity is essential to personal fulfillment. Live in your uniqueness. Remember: trying to be someone else doesn't work, she's already taken. You have so much value to offer this world. Let your queen energy shine through. Live your truth. Remain self-assured. Be unapologetically you.

[demonoflight]

Cute Off the Hook details from Japan-only Splatfests:

Pearl always steals Marina’s nuggets rather than get her own. She claims it’s because she gets full fast. Sure, Pearlie, we believe you. (Fries vs. McNuggets)

Pearl once tried to get a slosher filled to the brim with fries. (Fries vs. McNuggets)

...Marina has tried the same with nuggets, but more discreetly. Pearl still noticed. (Fries vs. McNuggets)

Marina is into hot yoga. (Dexterity vs. Endurance)

Pearl gets fidgety if she isn’t on the move and even stands on her chair and walks around the studio when the girls are recording. Very adhd of her! (Dexterity vs. Endurance)

Marina is a good cook and has a recipe for deep-fried chicken with lemon peels. (Lemon vs. No Lemon) Later, she also prepares dango after the Hana vs. Dango splatfest and oshiruko after the Tsubuan vs. Koshian splatfest. All of it is to be shared with Pearl, obviously!

Marina offered to pick out cool outerwear for Pearl after winning the Inner Wear vs. Outer Wear Splatfest, which Pearl agreed to despite complaining that clothes shopping with Marina always takes too long. (Inner Wear vs. Outer Wear)

Pearl and Marina had so much fun watching the matches for the Champion vs. Challenger Splatfest that by the second half they started cheering for each other’s teams. (Champion vs. Challenger)

Marina has a serious sweet tooth and claims her brain needs high sugar content to function. (Hana vs. Dango)

Marina asked the Inkopolis News staff to avoid bringing Mushroom Mountain biscuits to her and Pearl’s dressing room. She explains that the last time she ate a Mushroom Mountain biscuit, "its silhouette gradually started looking like Pearl” and she couldn’t unsee that and had to stop eating... (Mushroom Mountain vs. Bamboo Shoot Village)

Marina likes anko (azuki red bean paste) in any form and has no idea what her preference is until Pearl probes into anko-based dishes Marina likes and accidentally makes her realize she’s Team Koshian. Pearl was so ready to have Marina on her team too... (Tsubuan vs. Koshian)

Between Marina being a newbie to the surface world and basically only watching anime and TV dramas (as she should), she has to admit on live television that she has only the bare minimum idea of what boke and tsukkomi are. Pearl teaches her by invoking an entire manzai gag utilizing Marina’s obsession with heavy machinery. (Boke vs. Tsukkomi)

Marina is extremely prone to infodumping. It’s super cute. Pearl usually lets her go on but sometimes she has to remind her they’re live and can’t turn Inkopolis News into a 2-hour documentary show unprompted. The one time she relents and promises Marina she can talk about something she’s into in their next live show, Marina gets super excited and says she’ll bring a screen and projector and prepare materials for it. Pearl accepts her fate and proceeds to inform their audience to prepare for a 24-hour live show and bring snacks and sleeping bags. (Boke vs. Tsukkomi)

After Pearl sells Marina on the idea of actually attending a baseball match (as per the North American Baseball vs. Soccer splatfest, Marina knows squat about baseball), she regretfully informs her she’s banned from the regular stands at the stadium and always has to watch from the VIP room because she gets too excited and... well, her voice, you know how it’s like. Marina resolves to set up the acoustics at the stadium so she and Pearl can go together. (Ce vs. Pa)