tangledlines-shadowedminds

[tangledlines-shadowedminds]

As sickness goes, this week as been better, but today was a worse day. I am lucky this sickness is not something that can be caught by others. But tonight, I'm a bit jittery at the excitement of tomorrow. Many friends graduate college, I get to see my absolute best friend, and meet my wonderful month old niece. I worry for how well I will do but all I care about is seeing my friend and meeting her daughter. This is something I have been looking forward to since august when I found out I was going to be an aunt. Terrifying but exciting. I even made cookies.

[tangledlines-shadowedminds]

So I'm kind of sick and part of being means I have to drink a lot of water, which I suck at doing. Usually to get around that, I have a water bottle with a straw, but I have misplaced that water bottle so for now I have a fancy little cup that I've been drinking my water out of. I fill it with the water from my normal water bottle(cuz need the filtered stuff & when I add my extra mixes its easier to use). It has been working so well that I've had like three water bottles worth of water so far today, which is a lot for me.

[tangledlines-shadowedminds]

I love the energy! But honestly! Not that fun! I'm on the larger side and I HATE the feeling of not having a bra on if I'm not full covered by a shirt or just not having a shirt on at all. Granted I have hella texture issues so that might play into it but crop tops don't play nice with the bigger sizes.

TITTIES IN CROP TOP W NO BRA

TITTIES IN CROP TOP W NO BRA

TITTIES IN CROP TOP W NO BRA

TITTIES IN CROP TOP W NO BRA

TITTIES IN CROP TOP W NO BRA

[tangledlines-shadowedminds]

This is me right now

I should do some writing!

*sits down and stares at Tumblr for 30 minuets*

[tangledlines-shadowedminds]

I love sitting down to write with my very good water and just suddenly hearing many sirens go past my window.

i cannot wait to move, I just wish it was to the nicer place, not back to my parents place. Sickness is not cool.

[tangledlines-shadowedminds]

Slam Poetry

Once upon a time, before my wonderful man was truly mine, there was another. That time brought both joy and pain. It also helped me create a wonderful slam poem for class. Enjoy.

The moon was bright, sky clear The light shining in your eyes Full of a love I did not fear My heart races, stomach full of butterflies Not ready for the end The end that would soon shatter us both Now we just pretend Pretend that we didn't break our oath Normal in front of our friends Unaware of the pain That hangs in between us without mend My heart aches as I sit in the rain Longing for you but knowing The chance was gone, moment over The tears begin flowing As I look up, wishing for closure

[tangledlines-shadowedminds]

Of course since this was for a class we had to cut it in half so here is the shortened version:

“No, no you don't get to speak. I trusted you. I thought you cared about me. But it was all just a lie. And if it weren’t for Fate, I would end you right here and now, ending your reign of terror the same way I ended the lives of those innocent people, but I’ll offer to let you live in exchange for your help on this mission. Once that ends, so does your protection.”

What should've happened when she found out that he was controlling her

Character: Anastasia

Background: Anastasia was in an underground cult for 19 years of her life, once she got out, she met Deku Deku and they traveled for two years before gaining a few more travel companions. Before this monologue takes place, Deku Deku used his music box to take control of the city, force a party member to assassinate a famous bard, and command all the other civilians to destroy the city. He allowed the party members to escape and the assassin member has just told her that Deku Deku has been controlling her. 

Setting: Outside of the destroyed Hadwich

Audience: Deku Deku and the rest of the party

“No, no you don't get to speak.  For the last two years, I’ve been blacking out and waking up in pools of blood, other people's blood. Do you understand how terrifying that was? How traumatizing that was? And you had the audacity to comfort me like it was a disease that I couldn’t control. I trusted you. I found safety in your words and all this time you’ve made me believe you cared about me, but it was all a facade, a perfect illusion to hide the monster you truly are.  I don’t know how I never noticed that it was always you, every time, always with that stupid box and cruel smirk right before I would lose consciousness. Forcing me to do what you couldn’t do yourself. And why? Just because I’m a little stronger, a little more powerful? You disgust me.  And if it weren’t for Fate, I would end you right here and now, ending your reign of terror the same way I ended the lives of those innocent people, but I’ll offer to let you live in exchange for your help on this mission. Once that ends, so does your protection. If I don’t kill you then, I will hunt you down for the rest of your miserable life to ensure that your fate ends just as theirs did, by the blade you’ve commanded.” “No, no you don't get to speak. I trusted you. I thought you cared about me. But it was all just a lie. And if it weren’t for Fate, I would end you right here and now, ending your reign of terror the same way I ended the lives of those innocent people, but I’ll offer to let you live in exchange for your help on this mission. Once that ends, so does your protection.”

[tangledlines-shadowedminds]

What should've happened when she found out that he was controlling her

Character: Anastasia

Background: Anastasia was in an underground cult for 19 years of her life, once she got out, she met Deku Deku and they traveled for two years before gaining a few more travel companions. Before this monologue takes place, Deku Deku used his music box to take control of the city, force a party member to assassinate a famous bard, and command all the other civilians to destroy the city. He allowed the party members to escape and the assassin member has just told her that Deku Deku has been controlling her. 

Setting: Outside of the destroyed Hadwich

Audience: Deku Deku and the rest of the party

“No, no you don't get to speak.  For the last two years, I’ve been blacking out and waking up in pools of blood, other people's blood. Do you understand how terrifying that was? How traumatizing that was? And you had the audacity to comfort me like it was a disease that I couldn’t control. I trusted you. I found safety in your words and all this time you’ve made me believe you cared about me, but it was all a facade, a perfect illusion to hide the monster you truly are.  I don’t know how I never noticed that it was always you, every time, always with that stupid box and cruel smirk right before I would lose consciousness. Forcing me to do what you couldn’t do yourself. And why? Just because I’m a little stronger, a little more powerful? You disgust me.  And if it weren’t for Fate, I would end you right here and now, ending your reign of terror the same way I ended the lives of those innocent people, but I’ll offer to let you live in exchange for your help on this mission. Once that ends, so does your protection. If I don’t kill you then, I will hunt you down for the rest of your miserable life to ensure that your fate ends just as theirs did, by the blade you’ve commanded.” “No, no you don't get to speak. I trusted you. I thought you cared about me. But it was all just a lie. And if it weren’t for Fate, I would end you right here and now, ending your reign of terror the same way I ended the lives of those innocent people, but I’ll offer to let you live in exchange for your help on this mission. Once that ends, so does your protection.”

[tangledlines-shadowedminds]

Quote prompts: 456 & 123

“If you want a future, you need to make sacrifices, we’ll sacrifice Sam!”

“I can fit a lot of things in my mouth"

This was it, today was the day that the winning team would be crowned. The air was nearly visible with tension as we entered the great hall. Sam’s grip tightened on my hand as we walked to our seats. Ary, Elizabeth, Seth, and Alex sat down just before us. “What do y’all think the last challenge will be?” I nervously questioned. The guys just shrugged before turning to look towards the front. “I think I heard someone say it was going to be a test of, like, loyalty or something,” Ary whispered across the table. “Maybe? I mean, with that much money being the prize, loyalty is definitely a good thing to test,” I whispered back. “I hope its-,” Elizabeth started, but before she could finish, there was a sudden, irritating buzzing of microphone feedback over the loudspeakers.  Everyone started covering their ears and complaining while there was a general panic on stage. Once they were able to unplug the right mic and plug it back in the announcer finally stepped up to the mic. “Well ladies and gentlemen, today is the last day of the Gold Rush Tournament! I am sure you are all as eager as I am to finish off today on a high note. Unlike the rest of the week, today will only be one challenge,” he smiles and changes the slides behind him.  “Now this challenge does have two parts. It will go like this: Your team will go out into the forest and collect as many acorns as you can in one hour. Once everyone is back in, you will have a half hour to help your selected candidate to get as many acorns in their mouth as they can. Once that time is up, our officials will come around and help each team count. The winners of this challenge will have the total of acorns they had added to their overall score so this could really change the tides for many teams.” He changes the slides again. Our team name pops up, fourth place. We all look at each other, determined. “I will now give you all time to prepare. You all have two hours before the challenge begins. Lunch is in a half hour. Have fun!” The announcer places the mic back on the stand and walks off stage. Chatter starts slowly before the entire room is talking at a normal rate. Our group is slightly more aggressively deciding this. Ary, in particular. “If you want a future, you need to make sacrifices,” Ary smacked her hand on the table. We all roll our eyes. “We’ll sacrifice Sam!” “I can fit a lot of things in my mouth,” he agreed, nodding his head. “It’s not really a sacrifice, he’s not going to die from it, just going to have a bit of jaw soreness probably,” Elizabeth says, putting a hand on Ary’s arm. “Well, I'm definitely not doin it so, better him than me,” I put up my hand in surrender.

[tangledlines-shadowedminds]

I did write this with a film brain

Prompt: quote number 395(yes this is a repost i am fixing somethings with my new account)

The quote the scene is based off of. @endlessnebula

Person 1: A fate worse than death. Person 2: Coin

the scene in all its glory. If you have suggestions, please, give them, I love help!!

Our scene begins in a college meeting room, tables moved around to make decent set up for a whiteboard battle field. Five 20-something year olds are seated around this set up. “And…. oof, does a nat 20 hit?” Alex asks. “Mmm yeahhh it does,” Maggie replies. “And that's……. 29 points of damage.” “I’m down.”  “Shoooooooooot noooooo, none of us near you can heal you,” Uriah complains. “I…I can always try something,” I say. “Oh? Ohhhhhhhh, yeah no I get you.” “Mister DM, I’d like to use a thing but I’ll describe it in a different way than normal. So here what's going to happen, while they are attacking, I'm going to let myself quickly flash back to the fear I felt when they almost died in that megalodon attack, that helpless feeling.  “Then I’m going to remember how I felt the first time I ever raged, how good it felt to be so angry, and how badly I want to do that again.  “Then I'm going to remember that I need magic for this to work, so I’m going to pray to the broom God and leave 10 gold on the ground for him and take the flying broom grab my whip and ask him for the assistance I need since if I rage, I personally won’t have my own magic for this part.  “Then I'll rage and fly straight at the beast and wrap the whip around his neck.” I quickly explained. “Wow okay, that's a lot of stuff, but anything cool you want Ritsuko to say?” Alex asks. “You hurt my family? You’ll suffer a fate worse than death,” I responded in a thick russian accent.  Alex laughs, holds out his hand, “Coin?” I hand him my last hero point. Suddenly our scene shifts onto a battlefield. A Lich, a half-orc, a harrington, a half-elf, and a kitsune replace the 20-something year olds. As Jon’s great hammer swings downward and narrowly misses the Lich’s arm, Hal’s great axe bites into the leg, searing into the thin skin. The axe buries itself into the bone. Hal struggles to free it, finally dunking down and narrowly avoiding Ritsuko, who comes  barreling in with her whip ready. Hal frees the axe, and turns to face the Lich once again. Ritsuko, taking the opportunity of Hal moving out of her range, flies towards the Lich on her broom, whip ready, and coils it around his neck grasping each end in her hands. “Ay, I could use your help Dekar, you are a bit stronger than I,” Ritsuko shouts in her thick accent.  “Ey, I’m coming,” a gruff voice returns. Jon climbs the lich, taking the whip in one hand. “Please help Ariel, she’s our best hope.” “Of course,” Ritsuko replies, sliding down the back, landing next to the half-elf, Ariel, who was unconscious. The black scars began glowing through her fur as she dropped her rage and cast healing spells to bring her friend back from the brink of death.

[tangledlines-shadowedminds]

Prompt: quote number 395(yes this is a repost i am fixing somethings with my new account)

The quote the scene is based off of. @endlessnebula

Person 1: A fate worse than death. Person 2: Coin

the scene in all its glory. If you have suggestions, please, give them, I love help!!

Our scene begins in a college meeting room, tables moved around to make decent set up for a whiteboard battle field. Five 20-something year olds are seated around this set up. “And…. oof, does a nat 20 hit?” Alex asks. “Mmm yeahhh it does,” Maggie replies. “And that's……. 29 points of damage.” “I’m down.”  “Shoooooooooot noooooo, none of us near you can heal you,” Uriah complains. “I…I can always try something,” I say. “Oh? Ohhhhhhhh, yeah no I get you.” “Mister DM, I’d like to use a thing but I’ll describe it in a different way than normal. So here what's going to happen, while they are attacking, I'm going to let myself quickly flash back to the fear I felt when they almost died in that megalodon attack, that helpless feeling.  “Then I’m going to remember how I felt the first time I ever raged, how good it felt to be so angry, and how badly I want to do that again.  “Then I'm going to remember that I need magic for this to work, so I’m going to pray to the broom God and leave 10 gold on the ground for him and take the flying broom grab my whip and ask him for the assistance I need since if I rage, I personally won’t have my own magic for this part.  “Then I'll rage and fly straight at the beast and wrap the whip around his neck.” I quickly explained. “Wow okay, that's a lot of stuff, but anything cool you want Ritsuko to say?” Alex asks. “You hurt my family? You’ll suffer a fate worse than death,” I responded in a thick russian accent.  Alex laughs, holds out his hand, “Coin?” I hand him my last hero point. Suddenly our scene shifts onto a battlefield. A Lich, a half-orc, a harrington, a half-elf, and a kitsune replace the 20-something year olds. As Jon’s great hammer swings downward and narrowly misses the Lich’s arm, Hal’s great axe bites into the leg, searing into the thin skin. The axe buries itself into the bone. Hal struggles to free it, finally dunking down and narrowly avoiding Ritsuko, who comes  barreling in with her whip ready. Hal frees the axe, and turns to face the Lich once again. Ritsuko, taking the opportunity of Hal moving out of her range, flies towards the Lich on her broom, whip ready, and coils it around his neck grasping each end in her hands. “Ay, I could use your help Dekar, you are a bit stronger than I,” Ritsuko shouts in her thick accent.  “Ey, I’m coming,” a gruff voice returns. Jon climbs the lich, taking the whip in one hand. “Please help Ariel, she’s our best hope.” “Of course,” Ritsuko replies, sliding down the back, landing next to the half-elf, Ariel, who was unconscious. The black scars began glowing through her fur as she dropped her rage and cast healing spells to bring her friend back from the brink of death.

[tangledlines-shadowedminds]

Today was a tough start, but a wonderful end with some good old dnd. Perhaps the joy of goofing off is what my mind needs to get away from the sickness and pain.

Truly, my precious Ritsuko(my dnd character) is what I need sometimes just to release the silly emotions I feel.

[tangledlines-shadowedminds]

I did half- write a response song to this as things got better from my man's perspective, although it was tough because I was trying to do it verse for verse which, in hindsight was silly

This is not a dream It’ll never fade It’s been you everyday Putting a smile on my face I look into your eyes I see the love inside Tell me what you see Is it love you’ll find Deep inside of me? Tip it on its side Won’t let the seconds slip away

There was a time, long ago, where pain struck the safest of places. I created a poem, perhaps a song? This pain developed far and wide, although I denied to others that it was my true thoughts

Don’t let it be a dream Don’t let it fade away Baby stay with me In happiness we’ll lay Look into my eyes Tell me what you see Is it love you’ll find Deep inside of me? Or will we crash and burn The brutal end in sight No hope to be found Only pain into the night Oh baby, just take my hand Lead me through the dark So we can take a stand Before we lose our spark We’ve been through many storms, The raging seas we’ve tamed, Only to be caught in a whirlpool Our future’s left unnamed We’re slipping fast Like sand in the cracks Seconds tick ticking In an hour glass I can feel the end is near But maybe that’s just my fear She’s got me locked down Tied up Strung out Wanting to just Break down Hide out Lay low Head to the ground Nothing makes sense, Nothing but the stupid fuckin song inside my head I’m not ready Not ready for the fight Not ready for the feelings to all come crashing down tonight

[tangledlines-shadowedminds]

Perhaps someday, this mind of mine will find the full release of creating films out of the scripts and stories I have built, but only time will tell

[tangledlines-shadowedminds]

There was a time, long ago, where pain struck the safest of places. I created a poem, perhaps a song? This pain developed far and wide, although I denied to others that it was my true thoughts

Don’t let it be a dream Don’t let it fade away Baby stay with me In happiness we’ll lay Look into my eyes Tell me what you see Is it love you’ll find Deep inside of me? Or will we crash and burn The brutal end in sight No hope to be found Only pain into the night Oh baby, just take my hand Lead me through the dark So we can take a stand Before we lose our spark We’ve been through many storms, The raging seas we’ve tamed, Only to be caught in a whirlpool Our future’s left unnamed We’re slipping fast Like sand in the cracks Seconds tick ticking In an hour glass I can feel the end is near But maybe that’s just my fear She’s got me locked down Tied up Strung out Wanting to just Break down Hide out Lay low Head to the ground Nothing makes sense, Nothing but the stupid fuckin song inside my head I’m not ready Not ready for the fight Not ready for the feelings to all come crashing down tonight

[tangledlines-shadowedminds]

Another scene in the box of scenes, perhaps one day I'll share a short film script.

D (1): Do you reckon that I’ve lot my melon as well? Noah (2): No of course not 1: Bullshit, you think I’ve got mad! 2: No I do not. 1: You do! You lier. 2: Oh come off it D, you’ve been such an attention seeker since teddy died. Now would you just shut up and get me a beer? 1: Attention seeker? What the fuck?

Lia (3): Noah, it’s only been three months since he died, of course she’s going to still upset about it. 1: Upset??? I’m fucking devastated, as should you! You speak of him like he was nothing! He was your son you heartless ass! 2: Jesus Christ D, you act like I didn’t spend two weeks crying my eyes out after it happened. 1: Well that’s because you didn’t, I did! You just sat there!

[tangledlines-shadowedminds]

Today may have been a sick heavy day but I had a beautiful view on my way home. I may have many worries but I'm glad to have the ability to see the sky like this.