jaw-writes

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They did an amazing job!

Rosa sculpture💖

This took foreverrr, I finished the sculpt in January and only started painting last week😭

She’s done now tho, I hope you like her!

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You’re so sexy. Do you come here often? 😏

I live here.

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Check out and support their art!

COMMISSIONS OPEN!! URGENT

PAYMENT is PayPal

It’s either 100% upfront!

Or 50% upfront then 50% after I finish the sketch you like. (So we can both avoid getting scammed >3<)

PRICES

Full body - 20 dollars

Half body - 15 dollars

Headshot - 7 dollars

Chibi - 7 dollars

Adding a background - 10 dollars

Things I can draw

-Men

-Women

-Humans

-Kemonomimi (human with animal ears)

Things I can TRY drawing

-Furrys

-Robots/cyborgs (they have to be on the more human side)

Things I cannot draw

-Extremely detailed robots

DM HERE OR ON DISCORD <3

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I Dared My Best Friend to Ruin My Life is a Queer Masterpiece

Trigger warning: Human trafficking (I hate that the sequel went there as it was NOT equipped to handle it, but it's important to the analysis of one of the characters)

First of all, I’d like to apologize for the fact that you need to live knowing that a real human being spent this much time thinking critically about the subtext of the IDMBFTRML franchise. That’s just what autism, nostalgia, and too many nagging thoughts can lead to. Unfortunately, this is only partly ironic, you are not ready, I’m not ready, and no one ever will be.

(Also want to preface this with the fact that I am queer and have spent my life with many members of the queer community including my closest friends and current partner. The satire comes from the level of effort I’m putting into seriously over-analyzing this ridiculous Reddit story, not the identities discussed. You are loved and you are valid.)

My thesis today: “I Dared My Best Friend to Ruin My Life” contains an underlying queer subtext through the character of David King, Zander, and in the sequel series “I Dared My Best Friend to End My Life”, Sophie Atrickson.

At the beginning of the story David and Zander sit together on a couch in Zander’s home bored out of their mind. Engaging in a semi-nihilistic conversation on how they lack motivation in their lives, David brings up the structure that high school gave due to its rules and tasks. However, one of these sticks out from the rest, among expectations like getting good grades and not staying up past curfew is the act of getting a girlfriend. This subtly implies that David does not see fulfilling hetero-normative roles as something that is a natural part of himself, but instead another convention to follow. This, in tandem with the lack of evidence that David has dated anyone up to this point, indicates that while he listed it, he did not go through with it. This mention of obtaining a female partner, for someone who is supposed to be a master manipulator, is likely just to help the more romantically inclined Zander understand. Long story short, David sees dating a woman as an expectation rather than a desire and only brings it up because he believes that’s what Zander wants.

Once the dare is set into motion, they both agree to ruin each other's lives and David punches Zander in the thigh. The placement of this hit and its presence after those lines is important. Due to homophobia and transphobia, being outed can be life-ruining. This word choice coupled with the story’s focus on identity theft is a genius, subtle parallel to how trans people who are forced to remain closeted, de-transition due to circumstance, or deny their true selves. They know who they are, but that self is lost in the crossfire of whatever is preventing them from openly living. The thigh, an area that those taking injectable HRT will often pick due to its high-fat content, is hit. Symbolically this is the start of Zander’s transition/gender exploration spurred by David, a character who began this story breaking conventional gender norms. Yes, David has “masculine” interests but he’s also emotionally open with a male friend, is there for him during his mildly depressive thoughts, and shows a physical closeness that men are often shamed for. These are all healthy traits and may indicate that he’s just not toxically masculine, but more direct evidence comes later.

When the harassment begins David floods Zander with pornographic imagery in his mail and on his account upon hacking. Part of Zander’s writing style is that he is incredibly detailed, even over-explaining the act of using a search engine as well as the specific contents of the other junk like racist statements and pen pal letters. Yet, he fails to provide any details on what the NSFW images contained, along with the contents of the photos of himself that David leaked. Both of these pertain to intimacy. The privacy of what he may find arousing, and images he didn't put online, a specific focus is placed on how awkward it is that his family saw these. Families are often the people that will be the least accepting of someone's queer identity, this may indicate that the contents of both did not align with the interests Zander should have a cishet man. A form of mocking that contributes to the overall subtext that David is trying to push him out of the closet. Which goes hand in hand with Zander’s deeper resentment of them. They make him confront parts of himself he feels he shouldn't have which ultimately leads to him committing violence against them.

After this, David attempts to break up Katie and Zander via text. David is later shown to be able to manipulate audio from Zander to use against him, and with their superior intellect could have easily made a fake voice note. Yet, they don’t, instead taking the more easily disprovable route of a written message. The lack of using their voice to communicate also coincides with their use of a variety of names, including Zander’s. This speaks to the trans experience of dysphoria around one’s birth name and voice as well as the solace of using one that fits you better. David is acutely aware of how it feels to hear a part of yourself in a voice that doesn't earnestly represent you and does not want to do that to Zander. A sentiment that is even kept when they frame him as he just puts his already angry words in another context rather than fabricating emotion. In the surface-level story, this is a practical decision, but more personally it is reflective of David’s discomfort with the voice and name given to them. A discomfort that Zander comes to later understand and weaponize against them in the finale when he gets hundreds of people to speak it.

The decision to break them up rather than instantly kill or take her also speaks to David being motivated by a sense of heartbrokenness instead of hate. David is the one who encouraged Zander to do more with his life, move out of his parents' house, and keep track of his money. They have always pushed him to be better, but he was content with letting their relationship fade away.

At any time he could have shown up at the house they’d spent so much time with each other in but he never made that minimum required effort. Yet, Katie, someone who did not know him nearly as much as they did got to be the one he took into his improved life. All because she was born a girl and David wasn't. They wanted that life with him, they wanted him to accept himself and the attractions that he pushed aside by downplaying their relationship (regarding David as just an old friend when explaining the situation). Which is why they acted the way they did, if Zander was not motivated to come into his own then they’d make him by pulling away the beard growing longer every month.

Now this is where we get into spoilers for the sequel series “I Dared My Best Friend to End My Life” If, for some demented reason you want to read it on your own you’ve been warned.

Some may argue that the later kidnapping of Katie is evidence against this interpretation, but it wasn't David’s decision. It was Sophie’s. Sophie is an individual whom David met at a bar and connected with over their shared beliefs that ruining lives improves people. Though they formed a relationship and were physical Zander remained David’s main focus at all times. Sophie hated this, not liking the lack of attention and kidnapping Katie in response. To adress the obvious, this further adds to the romantic undertones of Zanvid as a dynamic. Even when faced with someone they’re “dating” David makes Zander top priority, distancing from Sophie both emotionally and physically with time. Sophie also tries to make David conform to traditional gender roles though they both end up subverting them. Sophie describes the group of criminals they and David run as a family, directly comparing David to a father and themselves to a mother by proxy. The way they treat the “children” initially aligns with these standards, as David is less emotionally attached and handles practical training in crime. Meanwhile, Sophie has a deeper connection with the “family members” and in a sense “nurtures” them by encouraging them to give into their worst aspects.

However, these binary roles and expectations of cis-het society gradually flip. David, rejecting the system tells Sophie that there “is no us” and effectively runs away with Zander. This leads Sophie to take over both maternal and paternal roles, becoming more effective in the latter and eventually laying claim to the success of the family. Now, you may think that Sophie is just a straight cis-woman who was trying to force a queer person to conform, but I believe there is more to it. Sophie says that they didn't love David in the “I want to marry you way” but as a type of adoration and a thankfulness for the family they helped give them. This implies that the love they experienced towards David is not romantic. In tandem with this is the wording of “gave me a family” which is the kind of language a man would traditionally use towards a woman who bore his children. A key conflict between Sophie and David is that Sophie is more reckless and not as single-minded. These aspects of their career paths are meant to stand in contrast to their paths in gender understanding. Sophie thinks of gender in a very binary way, but is dipping their toes into a multitude of projects. Meanwhile, David thinks of gender, more fluidly, rejecting, hetero-normative society, but is single-minded when it comes to their love (Zander). Sophie’s admiration of David’s power and masculinity along with the pride they take in gaining such traits for themselves indicates that they are a trans male who is clinging to aspects of masculinity perpetrated by the patriarchy to find comfort. An aspect that is alluded to at many points such as how he mostly surrounds himself with men, does a lot of heavy “macho” drinking, and Clark even mistakes him for David when seeing him wear his clothes after David’s death. At the same time, all these actions are just means of coping with their need for masculine validation while they deny the truth.

Some trans men and women engage in a mindset of “transmedicalism” which supports the existence of trans people but only under the gender binary with extreme dysphoria, hormones, and surgery being required to fully transition. This mindset is toxic as it is bigoted against non-binary identities and trans people who do not wish to take all of those steps and maintain aspects of their given bodies. Sophie’s enforcement of the gender binary is likely aligned with these views and is why he refuse to be out. He may feel that he does not have enough gender dysphoria to be valid or just outright denies his feelings so he doesn't have to go through the pain of the process he has made him self believe is required. However, this extends beyond internal conflict and bleeds into how he treats others.

In his attempts to feel masculine he puts women and fems down in the process. Starting with David, he is against their distancing from traditional gender roles and messes with they’re Zander plans. In the context of the romantic subtext, he is trying to bring an end to an affair and is treating Katie, a woman, as collateral damage. In a sense, he feels that David’s feelings for Zander are imasculating him. Being with someone like David is a double-edged sword, at times he ignores their masculine aspects to feel like a man for “having a woman” but when that veneer of gender solidity peels, and David’s perceived masculinity shows, he reverts to denial and gives them the pants to wear in the relationship. A healthy person would understand that they don’t need to change their own identity based on that of their partner to remain “straight” but his self-hate runs so deep he complicates everything. David, in all their cosmic genius, knows all of this but does not do anything about it. They are confident in their identity and the subpar bigoted views of someone like Sophie are not a concern to them. However, they do stick with him for a reason. It is that exact internal conflict that makes him similar to the questioning and self-hating Zander. That in addition to his similar appearance to him (they both have light hair and it's indicated in “I was abducted while studying abroad” that David has an attachment to people who resemble Zander) that they stick with him.

All this to say yes, Sophie later encouraging David to kill Zander stems from Sophie not wanting to be cucked. He’s the most incel trans man ever. He needs David to fit in whatever box benefits him most so he doesn't have to contend with the complexity of the self.

(This part will contain mentions of trafficking and SA)

As for Katie, it gets even worse. He canonically tortured Katie during the time she was held by him. The specifics are not known but he did have her beaten and kept her in unhygienic conditions. Due to him equating power to manhood, he harms her along with other women and girls by holding them hostage and selling some. It never got to that point with her, but if he had her under his thumb for longer it could have gone there. His struggle with gender identity is not the problem, but instead the way he attaches himself to the worst of toxic masculinity to validate himself. In the end, she stabs him to death in a burning church, a structure that he also stood in control of in a patriarchal fashion. Dying as the worst version of a man imaginable at the hands of someone he had hurt. Opposed to David who died with self-acceptance at the hands of a lover who realized themselves in the wake of what they experienced.

This leads us back to the pair that led to it all. Zander and David. At the end of the first story, Zander says that he is a changed person and we as an audience know David has won. Subtextually, this means Zander has accepted his queer identity, whatever it might be. This shift as a person is also discussed in the sequel, as Zander has been hardened by his previous journey, but is stronger for it. David won, and their lover has accepted themselves, but only after they sacrificed everything. The sanctity of their body, morality, and years of planning are all dust in the wind. Though they live on once Zander gets into David’s computer and leaks the documents revealing Sophie’s actions. It's never stated, but it can be inferred that David wanted this, they wanted Zander to be with them and free them both of Sophie. Though ultimately, only Zander got to drown his dark reflection.

This essay ended up being way more tragic than I expected since this is the the “David FUCKING King” story but even if this was 100% intentional, I’m glad I wrote this. The world may be full of a lot of hate, but we don’t have to be Sophie’s or David’s. We can choose life and love, even when that feels like a luxury we can’t afford. Happy Pride Month everyone.

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We all have secrets that haunt us...

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I have just discovered that baby cookies are tiny blobs of unbaked dough and it feels like a crime that people are not talking about it nearly enough

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Me when

Me when David Fucking King ruins my credit card credit (he has my gf at gunpoint too I guess…)

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I wonder if tumblr likes Rico Nasty more than insta and tiktok

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12/8/22: decomposing vertebrae harboring algal growth.

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Dear Supporter,

I hope this message finds you and your family in good health. My name is Eman Zaqout from Gaza. I am reaching you out to seek your urgent help in spreading the word about our fundraiser. I lost both my home and my job due to the ongoing genocide in Gaza and we are facing catastrophic living conditions. 💔

I kindly ask you to visit my campaign. Your support, whether through donating or sharing, will help us reach more people who can make a difference. Thank you for your continued support for the Palestinian cause. Your dedication brings us closer to freedom. 🙏🕊

Note: Verified by several people as 90-ghost and aces-and-angels. ☑

https://gofund.me/b141d50f 🔗

Please offer support where you can, thank you.

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Cut and delete selection🫀/♥️

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‼️‼️🚨🚨🚨Why don't you support us, my friends? We are in a tragic situation. We want to be in a better place🚨🚨🚨‼️‼️

🇵🇸🍉🇵🇸🍉🇵🇸🍉🇵🇸🍉

💥Please read the story carefully and imagine the situation we are living in.💥

Plz visit the pinpost link on my page do donate or reblog

👇👇👇👇👇👇👇

400 days of war and genocide.😥 There is nothing in the markets, and if anything is found, it is extremely expensive.😭 The weather is very cold, and the tents are worn out from the summer heat.🔥 The children scream from the intense cold and the darkness of the night💥. There is no electricity, the water is contaminated, no education, no healthcare, and no medicine.😓 Pregnancy has exhausted me, and I wonder how my child will survive in these conditions if they arrive. There are not even vaccinations or clothes for children.😥 Some of my relatives are covering their children with pieces of plastic to protect them from the cold due to the lack of any income sources.🍉 In addition, the sounds of bombing, gunfire, and drones mimic the sounds of wild animals and screaming to frighten people in their sleep.😔 We don't know how long this suffering will last or if we will truly be able to endure it.😰🇵🇸🍉🇵🇸🍉

We want to reach our goal we still in the beginning 🙏🙏

https://gofund.me/b845968e

✅verfied @gaza-evacuation-fund

✅bilal-salah0

✅khanger

✅dlxxv-vetted-donations

✅a-shade-of-blue

Support them if you can, they are in an awful situation and deserve to have a future to look forward to. I send love and well wishes their way, thank you.

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Hi palestine supporters 🇵🇸

I am Shima from Gaza,

Hope my message finds you well..

I’m simply don’t want to die, I want to live I want to give my children a better life. Help me to escape from Gaza❗️❗️

My home, along with all my cherished memories and dreams, was destroyed. Now, homeless, I struggle to find a safe place for my children.

Our situation is indescribable. the hopelessness of being unable to protect my family, and the desperation of not being able to provide for my children weigh heavily on me.

Please share, repost or donate to my family Please do not ignore my message 🙏🏻🍉🍉

Your donations are important for our survival

Please support them in any way you can! They are a family like any other and deserve a better life. Thank you

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When You...

When you commit genocide, the loudest screams are forced out of the innocent. Hundreds, thousands, ring out at pitches so high that dogs' ears burst. An immeasurable amount of pain is created, and no one is spared, from infants to elders. When you want a group off the face of the earth no exceptions are made.

Yet, despite how painfully deafening it is, most of the world doesn't hear it. Some never know about it and if they do, they take a moment to feel sorrow and proceed to put in earplugs. I can’t say I always blame them, I wish I could do the same, but I can’t, because I am a descendant of those who are being slaughtered. My parents, their parents, and their parents before have all existed under oppression. My blood carries generations from a dying people and culture. A group that is suffering in refugee camps as I stand here before you today. 

There is mourning built into my DNA. My bone marrow is a mix of lost souls. My face a combination of features that have been torn apart. The brown skin that binds me, a color regimes have tried to bleach. My hair, eyes, and skin, all shades that people want to be washed away in favor of a light canvas. Memories of mass murder have remained fresh in my mind. Stretching and sculpting my perception with trauma, to the point I can’t imagine having the privilege of living without it. I only exist as I am today because others like me weren't allowed to. 

Some can try to argue that my people deserved it. That far too many of us are dirty and in need of washing. This cleansing has multiple meanings. To wash away our heritage, and force our traditions and beliefs to die with us. To wash away our claim to land, leave us without homes so the majority gains more. To wash away our blood, slaughter us all, and burn the remains. Then, lastly, and this is the most important piece of the demented puzzle, to wash away our history. If no one remembers what the world lost, no one can grieve or hold you accountable.

Now, with how complex and cruel that process is, you have to wonder, what drives a single person to think that it’s okay? Let alone entire societies. Well, every maniac has a different tail they spin to themselves, and the masses, but it all ties back to one thing. Superiority. The idea is that whatever group you are attacking is less deserving of what you’re fighting them over, even if that is something as inherent as the right to live. You are in the right in your views, there's is backward. They are villains who seek to harm those who do nothing wrong, you are the hero who does what is right. They are criminal, they are rotten, they are filthy. You are lawful, you are pure, you are clean. So, it’s only your divine right to cleanse.

When you experience genocide, you and your loved ones scream so loud that they rip their vocal cords. Hundreds, thousands, of people you knew in your everyday life are abused and taken away like they are nothing more than weeds on a lawn. A pain you can’t put into words is created, and no one is safe, from your parent to your child. When you are part of a group being erased from the world and the minds in it, you are not an exception.

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romani miku!!