moonyspride

[moonyspride]

Regulus: Tout ça c'est de ta faute.

James: I know, I know.

Regulus: Wait, you understand French?

James: No, I just know “this is all your fault” in every language.

[moonyspride]

Regulus: well, I don't like Potter anymore, so it's time for me to get back out there and spread my-

Barty: legs

Regulus: wings. My legs?! No, spread my wings thats-

Evan: I mean, either way

Regulus: no, not eith... actually

[moonyspride]

if the marauders era had twitter:

(if anyone gets this reference,, marry me???)

[moonyspride]

james: DATE NIGHTTTTT

james: WHAT DO I WEAR

remus: clothes would be a good start mate

peter: oh and definitely some boxers

peter: unless you wanna go commando

sirius: jamie… please don’t turn up in your birthday suit to take my brother on a date

remus: reggie might like that though

sirius: don’t speak so daft remus

sirius: reggie doesn’t like naked bodies. he’s too young.

peter: he’s a year younger?

remus: sirius. question.

sirius: yes my moonage daydream?

remus: did you like the look of naked bodies last year when you were 17?

sirius, winking: i liked the sight of a naked you

peter: *walks out*

remus: padfoot.

sirius: oh come on. you practically gave me that one.

james: i mean you kinda did.

james: anyways. you’ve been no help at all.

[moonyspride]

sirius: fuck me if i’m wrong but i’m an only child.

remus:

sirius:

remus:

sirius: so?

remus: i’m so done with you.

regulus: you couldn’t have just asked to shag him before erasing my existence?

sirius: sorry? who are you?

james: my boyfriend

sirius: HE’S WHAT

remus and regulus: *leave*

*distant screaming coming from the gryffindor common room*

[moonyspride]

since the old version of this post was flagged for ‘adult content’…

reblog this post if your account is a trans safe space or owned by a trans person!

along with that, reblog if your account is a non-binary spectrum safe space or owned by someone on the enby spectrum!

[moonyspride]

HELL YES

the urge to write a starchaser siren au with reg luring james to his death but suddenly just like oh he's hot

would anyone read that

[moonyspride]

peter, the only one with a brain

Sirius, thinking of Remus: It's not gay to have like...fantasies about another dude, right?

Remus, thinking of Sirius: Erm...no. Definitely not. As long as you don't... act on it.

James, thinking of Regulus: Yeah, no, it's.... completely straight.

Peter:

Peter: No, that's really fucking gay.

[moonyspride]

james: everyone thinks you suck.

regulus: suck what exactly?

james: just suck at being a person.

regulus: well they’re probably right. but i think you have the wrong number...

james: remus ?

regulus: nope. regulus.

james: well…

james: wait what suck did you think i meant ????

regulus: idk james you’re texting me at 1am in the morning. what suck do you think i thought of.

james: REGULUS????

[moonyspride]

regulus: honestly, I am so evil. So full of darkness. I feed off the souls of the living I strike fear into-

remus: you sleep with a teddybear.

regulus: he’s sECOND IN COMMAND IN MY ARMY OF DARKNESS!

[moonyspride]

sirius: bad news - reggie locked himself outside of his and james’ house.

sirius: good news - we didn't have to wait around for a locksmith.

sirius: bad news - james finds it very concerning that I know how to pick locks, and tried to unlock my tragic backstory. i was too embarrassed to admit that the reason i learned it was because, at thirteen, i figured that was the kind of skill that would impress cute guys.

sirius: good news- a cute guy saw me do it.

sirius: bad news - it was remus, and since he’s already seen me fall out of several trees, cry because i saw a fawn that was just too damn small, and knows i can ride a unicycle, he’ll never think i’m cool no matter what i do. it's too late. he knows.

marlene: you’re a fool.

[moonyspride]

Peter: You lot think there's a way to describe bubbles angrily?

James: Nah, its too innocent of a thing-

Regulus: dark solvent orbs of death

[moonyspride]

[moonyspride]

James “fuck it” Potter

Sirius “fuck me” Black

Remus “fuck off” Lupin

Peter “oh fuck” Pettigrew

Lily “fuck this” Evans

Marlene “fuuuuccck” McKinnon

Mary “fuck you” Macdonald

Dorcas “fuck my life” Meadows

Regulus “fuck everything” Black

Evan “well fuck” Rosier

Barty “for fucks sake” Crouch Jr.

Frank “fuck fuck fuck” Longbottom

Alice “what the fuck” Prewett

[moonyspride]

Regulus: um Sirius, I have to tell you something. I’m gay-

Sirius: oh my god bitch ME TOO

Regulus: -and I’m dating your best friend

Sirius: I-

Sirius: oh my god bitch ME TOO

[moonyspride]

THIS WOULD SO HAPPEN

I headcanon trans regulus Black, and you know how the stairs on the girls dorm turns into a slide if a boy tries to go up, I feel like as soon as regulus stepped his little trans ass on those stairs in first year hogwarts was just like. No. You are boy. LEAVE!!

[moonyspride]

this kind reminds me of that one b99 episode where holt thinks it’s better to tell kevin he’s watching p0rn than doing work😭 and i love it.

Regulus: why is your back all scratched up?

James: *flashback to when he chased a raccoon (barty in his animagus form) after reg told him not to bother it*

James: I'm having an affair