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rebeatros · 1 year ago

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actually screaming

secret (sirius black x reader)

summary: (y/n) (y/l/n) has known sirius black since they were kids, being part of the sacred twenty-eight and coming from elitist pureblood families meant that they had shared uncomfortable reunions and awkward dinners for as long as they could remember. once in hogwarts, sirius makes it well known that he’s everything his parents are not and (y/n) is forced to follow into her family’s steps. they shouldn’t be friends, but they are. after all, (y/n) knows him better than he knows himself and sirius is the only one that sees through her façade of a perfect daughter. they are best friends, maybe something more, but it must remain a secret.

warnings: relationship violence (not detailed and only briefly mentioned)

a/n: this fic is my baby, i love her w all my heart.

i. prologue

(Y/N) could only remember pieces of her childhood, fragments buried deep in her mind that when she thought back upon them they brought a smile to her face. She could recall the feeling of the sun hitting her skin, making it warm to the touch. She could remember the sweat that had dripped down her face after running around for hours and how her mother had wiped it off using her pastel green handkerchief, her head shaking in disapproval. She could recall the sweet taste of lemonade that had been prepared by the Malfoy’s house-elf and the smell of blooming flowers. Oh, and how could she ever forget about the piggy tails, those damned piggy tails that had tugged at her scalp but that her mother was adamant she needed to use because they made her look like a “proper little lady”. She could remember running as she played with the other pureblood kids in the enormous backyard of the Malfoy Manor. Well, it would hardly be fair to call it a game, they more so competed with each other (which had almost always resulted in someone crying) but she could only remember the feeling of joy. It had been fun, probably the most fun she had ever been allowed to have.

Faces were mostly a blur, as they usually are when one is young. She could distinctly remember Father’s frown and the tapping of his fingers in the table whenever he was disappointed, a habit that stayed as the years went by. About Mother she could recall her perfectly manicured hands and the way they would thread through her hair at night, roughly pulling at the knots. But, above everything else, she could vividly remember Sirius Black. His grey eyes— one of his most distinctive features and the one thing that hadn’t changed as he grew older —were the one thing she remembered the most. They were strikingly beautiful, always bright with amusement and shining with mischief. Maybe that had been what had lured her in. Or, perhaps, it had something to do with the gentleness and warmth that could be found in those grey eyes, behind layers of playfulness. There was a certain fondness when those eyes looked at her, something she wasn’t accustomed to. Either way, (Y/N) (Y/L/N) found herself becoming close friends with a young Sirius Black, one that was fiercely protective and didn’t hesitate to break rules or push boundaries for her.

(It was to be expected, really. Not only did they spend a vast amount of time together, but he was unlike anything she’d ever known. She’d grown up in a household where love was scarce, surrounded by people that were too focused on obtaining power and money, blinded by their belief that blood purity made them better. Sirius was like a feeling of warmth and gentleness in a world that was frigid and vicious.)

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rebeatros · 3 years ago

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