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#‘I’m relieved you won’t be arrested but I’m going to kill you both’
ahsokatanohno · 1 year
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HERA AND LEIA ARE PALS. AHSOKA AND EZRA AND SABINE REUNITED. AHSOKA IS HOPEFUL AND THRIVING. THREEPIO IS HERE ON BEHALF OF SENATOR AND DEFENSE COORDINATOR LEIA ORGANA. ZEB IS TRAINING RECRUITS. MY HEART IS FULL.
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enkisstories · 7 months
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Armitage: "Wake up, rebel scum!"
Poe (waking up): "Oh, I'm so glad! It was all just a dream! I'm still on the Finalizer! ... No, wait, my arms are free..."
Looking up, Poe also spots Armitage's turquoise pendant, that the General hadn't yet worn back at Jakku. And neither had the pilot known Hux' first name or had Finn went by a name at all. Yet those names are clearly edged into Poe’s mind, and in special places, too.
Poe: "Oh, shit. No such luck, after all."
Still on Ryloth. Still very nearly having killed each other and Rose. Over a flirt. Granted, having parttaken of Colonel Cahill's fiendishly strong wine had led to the fight, but the underlying conflict had long been brewing.
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Armitage: "You sure love yourself a First Order man, ey? Should we get Ben here, too?"
Poe: "Can we pretend you're still your pre-defection selves and then you kill me quickly?"
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Finn: "Poe... At least look at us! Please!"
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Finn: "Please?"
Poe: "Goodness, Finn, I don't know what to... How mad exactly are you at me now?"
Finn: "How could I be mad at YOU, when I started this mess?"
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Poe: "Because you were merely intoxicated. Me, I was selfish. I wanted to have my cake and eat it. See, ever since we left Batuu, I harbored feelings for both of you.”
Armitage: *tickle, tickle*
Poe: “Noooo... you’re only making it worse... now I want you to go on...”
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Poe: "I was so relieved when you got arrested and were finally out of my life. It was finally over! I could be the boyfriend my Finn deserves! But then you returned and it all started anew. That’s why I said I hated you “for existing”.”
Finn: "And you thought I never noticed you flirting with Armitage? Poe, dearest, I hate to break to to you, but between us you are not the brains."
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Poe: "Yeah, it showed! Everything came crashing down, when you flirted with each other, leaving me with nothing.
I freaked out. I already pictured you two getting married! And I saw myself all alone, having lost everything. Just because I couldn’t choose."
Armitage "But we have chosen, while you slept. We decided that we will to be together..."
Poe: "Yeah. I figured you would."
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Finn: "...with you, idiot!"
Poe: "Wh...at?"
Armitage: "As long as everything around us is utter chaos, we agreed to share you.”
Poe: “So you are interested...? Really?”
Armitage: “Quite honestly, I am a fish out the water in this team. I could focus much better if at least that “will we or won’t we” wasn’t nagging at me anymore, what ultimately would benefit the mission.”
Finn: “But with that kind of arrangement, things may happen between me and Armitage, too. It’s not very likely, but possible. You need to be aware of that.”
Armitage: “And when the war is over, we’ll re-evaluate the situation.”
Poe: “How romantic...”
Finn: "The only way out of this madness.”
Armitage: "Fair?"
Poe: *nods*
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from-the-clouds · 3 years
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Kiss Me More (Part II) - Zemo/Reader
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Masterlist || Part One
Summary: Part two, read part one if you haven’t already! Sam & Bucky put reader in charge of looking after Zemo....again. Series loosely inspired by this song.
Words: 2.5k
Warnings: Kissing, heavy petting, mentions of sex, minor TFATWS spoilers.
A/N: Wow! I was so shocked on the feedback I got on the first part of this story. It has nearly 800 notes. I’m not used to my writing getting that kind of attention so I really appreciate the love. I decided to make this into at least a 3-4 part series and there will be eventual smut, but I feel like there’s something sweet between these two that goes beyond an obvious physical attraction, so I do want to build that a bit before we get there. This weekend I rewatched TFATWS & Civil War because I’m officially obsessed with Zemo lol. Please let me know what you think, and let me know if you’d like to be added to the taglist. :) 
-----
“Keep an eye on him.”
Y/N watched Bucky and Sam split off again. That was now at least the third time she’d heard that phrase since she arrived in Riga. Little did they know, she was probably the worst person to be put in charge of Zemo. Truthfully, it was starting to be a little insulting.
It was unclear why she’d been brought along on this mission, when half the time Sam and Bucky were talking in hushed tones just out of her earshot. There was always more to the story than they told her, but this time, it felt like she was more out of the loop than ever.
She adjusted the neckline of the sweater she wore out of an abundance of caution, checking subconsciously to make sure it hadn’t exposed the mark Zemo had left on her from the day before. It was a discovery she’d made that morning, and persisted despite her efforts to cover it up with makeup.
“According to those two, I must be the best at babysitting you,” she muttered under her breath. It was petty, so she wasn’t even sure if she wanted him to hear. But he did.
“Babysitting?” Zemo lifted an eyebrow. 
“You know, a nanny, a governess….whatever a Baron’s equivalent is,” she said, looking him in the eye for the first time that day, which was a mistake. He looked so handsome in that long, fur-lined coat, tall and refined, hair styled perfectly. There had to be warrants out for his arrest since escaping prison, and in his current getup, he was hard to miss. 
It wasn’t easy to ignore the stifling tension between them. The Baron hadn’t left her thoughts since she’d closed the door on him the evening before. Now they were alone again. She couldn’t decide if that was thrilling or terrifying, so she decided on both.
“It’s nice of them to give us some alone time,” Zemo stepped close to her, one gloved hand pressing between her shoulder blades. Despite the cool temperature outside, it was the first thing today that had her shivering. 
“Walk with me,” he commanded sternly. She saw no opportunity to refuse as they started in the direction opposite of where Bucky and Sam had disappeared. 
“Zemo-”
“Helmut,” he corrected her. “But go on…”
“We have to focus on figuring out where Donya’s funeral will be,” she said, feeling his hand slide down to settle on the small of her back, trying to inch away, but he just pulled her closer. “We can’t waste time.”
“I know Riga inside and out, that won’t be as difficult as you and your friends think,” he murmured. His proximity was already suffocating. Or maybe comforting. It was hard to tell. “Tell me, what is your business with them? You aren’t an Avenger. This was my first time hearing your name.”
She snorted, finally finding the strength to pull away, and he dropped his hand. That was one thing that had confounded her. He was confident, took liberties with what others would allow, but knew when to stop pushing. There was something alluring to his nature. 
“I’m not,” she responded, wondering how much she was willing to share. When she stole a glance out of the corner of her eyes, his head was lowered, leaning in, listening intently for her response. She wondered if he really cared, or if he was good at pretending. It was easy to believe that he did.
“Bucky and I aren’t that different,” she continued. “That’s why we’re friends. I’m not a super soldier, but I was taught how to fight, how to kill. I followed orders for too long without questioning whether or not I was doing the right thing. And at least now, I think I am.”
“You think,” he repeated, and corrected her again like he had the day before. As much as she wanted some kind of clever or quick quip back, she wore her heart on her sleeve for the moment and shrugged. There was nothing to defend when she still wasn’t sure what responsibilities she had in this world. 
Zemo halted, and she paused too, turning back to look at him. “So you were an assassin,” he murmured, reaching out. Nodding slightly, she lowered her eyes when his gloved thumb brushed across her face. The buttery, overpowering smell of leather took her over as he tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “I would’ve never guessed. Du bist so süß.”
Her knowledge of German was limited, but she could see a flash of what looked like affection in his eyes. He couldn’t be lying, could he? She wondered. She wanted to trust that he wasn’t, wanted to identify every good part of him she could, so she could justify the overwhelming attraction she felt towards him. Something in her just kept pulling forward against her will, like a magnet.
“You’d be surprised,” she answered, but didn’t pull away. The intensity of his gaze made her feel weak, but there was something strangely reassuring in his eyes. It was just the two of them, standing on a crowded sidewalk.
She rose her hand to clasp around his, frowning when she felt the hard loop of a ring on one of his gloved fingers. It had gone unnoticed by her, until now. He still wore a wedding band. 
It would have been easy to vocalize the observation, gauge his reaction, try to regain some upper hand and remind him who exactly he was dealing with. But, it would’ve been pointlessly cruel, as she knew what that felt like to answer that question. Those days were behind her, now. 
As if the universe was scolding her, a loud car horn broke through the perceived silence. His hand dropped from her face, and they began to walk again. 
“I had lots of time to think in prison,” he said after a heady pause in conversation. “About the things I’d done. Whatever intentions you have, to someone, you’re always the enemy. What I thought was important, trying to serve the greater good, it isn’t always worth the trouble. I was trying to protect what I had already lost, the places and people I’d taken for granted.”
Deciphering his words, she took a moment before responding. “That’s actually...very insightful,” she said, partly surprised by what he’d shared, appreciating that he felt her vulnerability, and matched it in his response.
“I know you’re stunned I’m not a brute,” he answered, increasing his pace to a determined strut rather than a lazy stroll. She was forced to keep up with him. “You’ve been told what to think about me by Sam and Bucky.”
She scoffed. “Not just them. The entire world. All the people you’ve hur-”
He halted and turned to face her so quickly, she collided with his chest and her breath caught in her throat. 
“I’m not that man anymore,” his voice was nearly a growl, disgust laced in his features as he looked down at her. 
But as soon as she recognized it, he became expressionless again, backing away. Falling back into step beside him, they continued to walk, a bit faster than they had been before. She followed him, at this point convinced that she might get lost without his guidance, but a little startled by his sudden change in behavior.
“What do you think of Riga?” he asked her as they cut through an alleyway. His voice held none of the venom that it had a few moments ago, so she wondered if she’d just hit a sore nerve.
“It’s beautiful,” she answered, admiring the old brick buildings and fine architecture. “But I think I haven’t had much of a chance to appreciate it.”
“Have you been thinking about me?”
They ducked under an alcove, and she realized he’d carefully led her off the crowded streets. It was much quieter here. She suddenly didn’t feel as protected as she had been with him in the open. The temperature in the shaded space was much lower than expected. And he was standing over her, waiting for some response she didn’t know if she could give. 
“I haven’t forgotten about last night, liebling,” he continued. 
Of course she had been thinking of him. Nearly nonstop. What they’d shared, what it meant. She hadn’t been able to sleep until she relieved herself, fingers rubbing her clit and delving into her warmth, whimpering his name when she finally came. Still, it had done little to quell the ache inside her. 
It was a horrible thing, she’d decided. Objectively horrible, and unprofessional. There was the consideration of accessibility. What did he see in her beyond a means to an end? Was she really going to throw everything she’d worked for away to a man who was going to use her to scratch an itch?
Too much was at stake, Sam and Bucky’s trust, her reputation, her job, and she couldn’t allow it to go on. 
But oh, how much she wanted it to. 
“Yesterday was nice,” she straightened up, holding her own. “I won’t lie to you.”
The corner of his mouth tugged up slightly in a self-satisfied smirk. 
“But I’m not foolish,” she continued. “Coming on to the first woman you see after you get out of jail? Seems pretty convenient.”
At first, the Baron tilted his head to the side, his brows pulled together at her words. But after a moment, the smile returned, and he chuckled. “Is that what you think this is about?”
“Don’t insult me, Helmut,” she said sternly, trying her best not to feel embarrassed. She was only being honest.
“Are you always so severe to yourself?” he asked, tutting lightly. 
It would have been better to say nothing. Why give him anything at all? 
She didn’t answer his question, just backed away from him and began walking in no particular direction, wanting only to increase the space between them and regain her common sense. That was impossible however, as she was jolted backwards before she even knew what was happening, a firm hand on her upper arm, and she was chest to chest with Zemo once more. 
“We were in Madripoor together. I could’ve had my way with many women there if I wanted. But I didn’t.”
“Please-” she rolled her eyes.
“If all I wanted to do was fuck someone, I could have done it by now,” he stalked forward, the air pressure around them dropping, weighed by the tension hanging thick between them. “But that’s not what I want. I want you.”
His words, spoken in a soft, low purr rattled away every bit of resolve she had left in her. Some last ditch effort found her stepping backwards, but her body met the brick wall behind them and she realized he had her cornered. 
In more ways than one, she thought.
Taking in a shaky breath, she looked up at his eyes, clouded with lust. “I know you want me,” he said, not a shred of doubt in his voice. But why should there have been? He was right. 
Her eyes darted around, like someone or something around them was going to jump out and save her from herself. It didn’t go unnoticed. “There’s no need to be scared, liebling. I feel it, too.”
With that, he closed the gap between their lips. He tasted sweet, like the candies he’d been eating back at his flat. Turkish delight. She was drowning in him again, his scent, his touch, everything about him enveloped and beguiled her. Her shirt had bunched up slightly somewhere along their walk and his gloved hands explored the exposed skin, leaving goosebumps in their wake. 
She surrendered, letting him tease open her mouth and claim her wholly. It was still bad, she knew. But there wasn’t any last bit of self-control left in her. 
The layers of clothing between them didn’t allow for the same proximity she’d had to him the evening before. Groaning in delight and frustration, she reached up to tangle and rake her fingers through his hair, as his fingers curled around the top of her sweater, revealing the sensitive skin of her neck. 
“Don’t hide this,” his lips left hers as his eyes focused on the stamp of affection he’d left behind the day before. “Let them see.”
“You know I can’t,” she responded, sheepishly pulling it back into place. Studying her with amiable consideration, his hand rose to brush tenderly across her cheekbone. 
“I thought you’d come to me last night,” she confessed, drawing away slightly, shocked by her own admission. But right now, she didn’t feel the need to put up as much of a facade. He looked positively virile; panting, his cheeks flushed and hair mussed, pupils blown out as he focused on her. To know she was the cause of his current state of disarray gave her an immense amount of satisfaction. A buried, salacious part of her wondered what else she could do to make him look even more unkempt.
“I considered it,” he said, sounding almost timid. “But I want to do this right.” He leaned in, pressed a kiss beneath her ear. “In private, so no one can disturb us,” he continued, lips moving down her neck. “We can take our time, you can be as loud as you’d like.”
The mental image he was currently painting for her was doing very little to strengthen her convictions, whatever those had been. The thought of her legs wrapped around his torso, naked bodies pressed together sent a bolt of electricity through the pit of her stomach, radiating outwards. She wanted his lips on every inch of her skin. Aching at the possibility, the present tease of his teeth nibbling on her collarbone wasn’t helping.
“You know we can’t,” she didn’t try to stop the thought as it came out of her mouth.
“What is there to lose?”
Everything, she thought, but didn’t answer. She couldn’t really, as his gloved hand was trailing slowly under her jacket and sweater, against her bare skin, and cupping her breast through her bra. Whimpering, she couldn’t control the way her body arched against his.
Hooking her knee on his hip, she let him press forward, feeling the warmth of his excitement through his trousers and her jeans. He ground against her once, teasingly, and she moaned softly into his mouth. 
He was the one to pull away, and she was thankful he did. “Think about it, liebling,” he said softly, pressing a tender kiss to her temple. “Du hast die Kontrolle.”
“We can’t,” she answered again, but even she didn’t believe herself. Raking her hands through her hair and adjusting her rumpled sweater, she straightened up. “We have a job to do.”
Brushing past him out of the alcove, each step she took away from him gave her the self control she desperately needed. She glanced over her shoulder to see him reluctantly trudging behind. At this point, she wasn’t foolish. There were only two ways this could end.
----
Part III
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alrightberries · 4 years
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Hi! So like what if Levi & F!Reader are like cuddling, and Levi over slept (maybe misses a meetings?) and Eren and his squad have to go find him and they see Reader and Levi all cuddly and stuffs. AND THEN Levi become super pissed bc they went into his quarters without permission and blah blah blah (you can decide the rest lolll) basically crack, fluff and humor lol. Please& thank uuu
the short end of the stick
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❈ pairing: levi ackerman x reader
❈ genre: fluff, semi-crack ❈ word count: 3.3k
❈ summary: In which the 104th cadets were not prepared to find out that the terrifying and ever-intimidating Captain Levi... is a little spoon.
❈ trigger warnings: implied sex. brief mentions of blood and death. profanity
a/n: i made the reader gender neutral, hope y’all don’t mind. i had too much fun writing this and got kinda carried away. this is my first request ever and i’m glad that i finished it. enjoy!
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Eren was shaking.
Sweat dripped down his forehead and his knuckles turned white from how hard he was clenching his fists, nails piercing his skin so harshly he swore it would draw blood. His heart angrily pumped inside his chest, every beat so strong he nearly anticipated for it to jump out of his ribcage at any given moment.
Fear.
He felt fear.
He puts a name to the feeling and it doesn’t make him feel any better. Ears ringing, lungs breathing rapidly as he tries to steady his fear-induced heart. He was hyperventilating. His eyebrows crease from his anxiousness and he feels his knees weaken, daring to give out beneath him. Was he actually shaking right now? He couldn’t even tell.
Vulnerable.
He felt vulnerable.
Eren had seen many horrors throughout his short lifetime. He saw the colossal titan rear its ugly head over Wall Maria as its foot smashed into the wall’s gates, debris flying throughout the district as a boulder crushed his home with his mother still inside. He saw his mother get snapped in half and eaten by a titan right before his very eyes at a tender age as he sat by and could do nothing but watch.
He was orphaned. Forced to grow up too soon, too fast just so he could say he survived. His entire district was left homeless, forced to become refugees as titans rampaged throughout the outer walls, forced plow the fields to combat the famine and hunger, forced to have 250,000 people go on what was essentually a suicide mission to appease the growing population.
He trained in the military. He trained for three gruesome years and had his physical and mental psyche crushed into dust beneath the boots of the commanding officer, only to be thrown into a battle—completely unprepared— with the titans once more before he could even graduate.
He saw his friends, his family, his brothers and sisters in arms get eaten. Killed. Murdered. Swatted away like flies by the very beasts he swore he’d kill.
And yet, nothing could prepare him for this.
Nothing could prepare him for the blood-pumping, adrenaline-induced terror at the mere thought of having to carry out his mission.
Nothing could prepare him for having to wake up Captain Levi from his nap.
Jean groaned. “Dammit, just fucking do it already.”
Eren is snapped out of his reverie, suddenly reminded that he wasn’t alone. His fellow soldiers stood behind him.
“Well if you’re so brave then why don’t you do it, horse-face?” He grits back, turning around and clenching his fists at his side.
He glimpses around the hallway and his eyes loom over his teammates’ amused faces, each painted with a shit-eating grin. Everyone was relieved that they weren’t the ones tagged with waking up the Captain from his nap.
Rumor around the base is, the last person from his original squadron (may they rest in peace) who had to wake up Captain Levi almost had his ear sliced off. Levi wasn’t even carrying any gear or anywhere near a knife.
One look at Mikasa told Eren that even she was glad she didn’t get picked for this task, and he shudders at the thought of being the poor bastard who had to lose his ear just so the Captain wouldn’t be late for his meeting. He quite liked having both of his ears attached to his head, thank you very much.
“It’s your task.”
“Yeah but why is it my task?!”
“Because you drew the short end of the stick, genius.” Jean replies easily.
Oh. Right.
“There has to be something we can do! Another plan. One that doesn’t involve waking up Captain Levi.” His eyes are pleading as he looks at his fellow soldiers, yet none of them seem willing to switch places with him.
Dammit. They were really going to make him work for it.
All his dignity is thrown out the window as Eren quickly gets on his knees and starts begging his friends, the shit-eating grins on their faces turning into wicked smiles as they watch him beg for mercy.
“Mikasa? What about you? Are you seriously going to let them send me to my death?” He asks, but Mikasa simply turns her head the other way as she speaks.
“He won’t kill you. Just sever your ear.”
Eren’s eye twitches.
She looks at him once more. “I’ll pick up your ear and ask the medical unit to sew it back on you. I’m sure they’ll understand.”
As proof, she holds up a glass jar and some tweezers. She had gloves on her hands.
God, he was going to kill his teammates.
Jean, apparently fed up with Eren’s incessant whining, marches towards him and grabs him by the collar, forcing him to stand up.
“Yeager, you trained in the military for three years. You’re a goddam titan shifter. You got kidnapped and held hostage. Three times. Waking up a growth-stunted man won’t be the last of you.”
Jean’s words are reassuring but it doesn’t quite reach his eyes. No, his eyes are still amused. Very amused.
Scratch that, he wasn’t going to kill all his comrades. Just Jean. Jean and his extremely punchable horse-face.
Before he could even reply, Eren is shoved inside the Captain’s office with a quick “Off you go!” and the door is quickly shut behind him.
Fear.
This was truly fear.
Captain Levi’s office is empty, Eren notices. It’s spotless as always and tall shelves line every wall, each filled to the brim with books and documents. A lone door sits at the far right wall.
The Captain’s bedroom.
Slowly, with bathed breaths, he forces his legs to walk closer to the door that held his fate. Briefly, Eren thinks about getting some protective ear covers (just in case) but he quickly shoves that idea aside when he realizes that Jean and Conny were likely blocking the door from the outside.
That, and he concludes that the Captain would just break another part of his body. Maybe his hands. He didn’t need ears for handling ODM gear but he did need his hands.
“Captain?” Eren’s voice is weak but clear as he knocks on the door. “Captain Levi, you’re late for your meeting.”
He holds his breath for a few seconds, and there’s no response. He tries once more.
“Captain,” he repeats, louder this time. “Captain, you really need to wake up. Commander Erwin says your attendance is required for the meeting to start.”
But there’s still no response.
His hands are shaky and he’s still extremely nervous, but he knew Captain Levi’s presence was urgent to the meeting. Classified, Commander Erwin had said when he asked what it was about. 
The third time Eren repeats his fruitless endeavors, he realizes that Captain Levi really wasn’t waking up any time soon.
He runs back to the door he came in from.
“Let me out!” He yells, hands throttling the doorknob as he tries to pull the door open but just as he suspected, Jean and Conny are sealing the exit and pulling at the doorknob as well.
“Let me out, dammit! Captain Levi won’t wake up, I don’t wanna die— just let me out!”
His feet are pressed up against the wall at this point and he manages to yank the door open by a few mere inches. A quick glimpse outside confirms his worse fears: all his friends are holding onto the doorknob as well, trying to keep the door closed. Even Mikasa.
He’d never felt so betrayed.
“You got this Eren!” His eyes drift to the back of the group where Sasha was smiling at him with a cheeky grin. “I’m sure the Captain won’t hurt you too badly when you wake him up.”
“No, fuck that! He’ll murder me and say it was because I went ape shit in titan form. He won’t even get arrested!”
It was when he made eye contact with Mikasa when he realized what true betrayal felt like.
“Good luck, Eren.” “No, don’t—!” Mikasa yanks the door close with one strong pull and he falls to the floor, on his ass.
The room is quite once more (save for the cheeky giggles on the other side of the door) and Eren brushes himself off as he stands up. He eyes the door to the Captain’s bedroom and he breathes in deeply when he comes to terms with what he has to do to wake the Captain from his deep slumber. He has to go inside.
He finds himself in front of the door once again, and this time his knocks are a little louder, a little more unsure, as he speaks. “Captain? I don’t think you’re waking up soon. I’m coming in.”
Slowly, he tells himself. Slowly.
Eren wasn’t sure what to expect when he opened the door to Captain Levi’s quarters. Maybe a torture chamber. Maybe swords and skeletons on the wall. Maybe a book on How To Murder With One Glare on a coffee table. He didn’t know.
But oddly, he thinks as he glances around, the Captain’s bedroom is... normal. The room’s dark, with its curtains drawn and the candles unlit. Tall shelves holding an impressive collection of books still line a portion of the walls. A bed is pressed up against the wall opposite the door, and there are two lumps underneath the blankets—
Wait.
Two lumps.
Two.
Captain Levi’s in bed with someone?
“Captain Levi,” Eren quietly calls out. He wonders who the hell managed to catch the Captain’s attention... or if someone even caught his attention at all. Captain Levi could just be hugging a pillow, he reasons. But Eren’s curiosity overtakes his fears and his legs start to walk closer towards the bed. “Captain?”
The blanket was pulled over the two sleeping lumps, and Eren gently tugs it down to reveal their faces.
No way.
No fucking way.
Briefly, Eren is speechless. His words get caught in his throat, hand frozen mid-air as he marvels at the sight of Humanity’s Strongest Soldier cuddled up within the arms of his lover. His normally stoic face is gone, replaced by relaxed eyes and a slightly ajar mouth, one cheek puffed up as it’s squished into his lover’s chest and his head is nuzzled into the crook of their neck. His arms disappear underneath the blankets, but judging by the fact that his lover’s arms were around him, Eren surmised that the Captain’s arms were most likely wrapped around his lover as well.
He looked innocent— cute, almost, and if Eren didn’t have to train under him everyday he might have actually believed that the Captain’s innocent sleeping face could be taken at face value.
Eren recognizes you, as well. He’s seen you around the base with your own squadron, an elite soldier with your own team of other elite soldiers. You’re known around the base as the squad leader who works their team to the ground, training your members so hard that they genuinely considered going to Captain Levi for comfort. But it wasn’t for naught, of course. Your squad’s survived longer than Captain Levi’s (again, may they rest in peace), barely making it out complete when the fiasco with the Female Titan occurred.
“Oi, Eren.” A voice behind him speaks, and Eren is briefly caught off guard as he turns around and makes eye contact with his comrades. Most likely, they got impatient with waiting for him and decided to see if he’d been murdered already.
Great, so now they decide they weren’t scared of going inside the Captain’s room.
“What’s taking so long?” Jean asks.
Eren is still speechless, opting to instead shakily point his finger towards the bed where Levi lay wrapped in your arms.
“H-he’s... he’s—“ “He’s what?”
He gulps and sighs deeply, speaking out so quietly his friends almost didn’t hear, speaking out in a mere shaky whisper as he utters his words.
“He’s a little spoon.”
Chaos is what Eren would use to describe what happened next. His comrades immediately jumped to stand next to him and take a look at the sight on bed, crowding around them as if they were a soap opera.
“Oh my god, he looks so...” Sasha starts in awe, hands on her cheeks and stars in her eyes but unsure how to finish her words.
Eren nods his head, understanding her speechlessness. “Innocent.”
Silently, his friends nod as well. But he couldn’t just stand here and gawk at Captain Levi’s sleeping form, he came here with a mission. “We need to wake him up. He’s already really late.” He says, more to himself than to his friends. He doesn’t wait for his comrades to exit the room as he gently places a hand on the Captain’s shoulders to shake him awake.
“Captain Levi—“
Eren learns his mistake too late as Levi’s eyes immediately snap open, hand clamping down on Eren’s and twisting it behind his back to disarm him.
“Eren!” Mikasa yells behind him, making a move to free him from Levi’s iron clad grip. From the corner of his eyes, Eren sees the person lying down next to Levi quickly sit up and throw something silver, flying past his comrades and towards Mikasa’s head, embedding itself deep within the wood next to her face.
Eren stares at his friends, all silent, frozen with fear, and rooted to their spots as their mouths hang open.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” Levi sneers, pushing down on Eren’s arm.
“C-captain, you’re late for the—“ “Holy shit, we’re late for the meeting.” You cut in, eyes wide in realization.
The Captain briefly glimpses at you and clicks his tongue as he releases Eren from his grip, the young soldier immediately slumping to the ground in relief. His arms and legs felt like jello and he could already feel himself melting into the wooden floor.
“Can someone explain to me why you brats thought it would be a good idea to enter my private quarters?” Levi glares. “Without my permission?”
Oh shit. They didn’t think this through.
A cold shiver runs down the soldier’s spines as they unanimously realize their mistake, something that Eren undoubtedly would’ve felt as well if he wasn’t too busy gawking at the realization that Captain Levi was shirtless (probably naked underneath the sheets), and you were shirtless as well (also probably naked underneath the sheets).
Levi catches Eren’s eyes staring at you, and he silently pulls the blanket over your chest and up to your collarbones without breaking his glare at the cadets.
Fuck. Eren thinks, eyes snapping to the ground as a blush creeps up his neck. Captain Levi’s definitely going to cut off both my ears now.
Conny, apparently already cracking under the pressure, flails his arms and yells as he tries to make a run for the door. Before anyone could even blink, another silver blur whizzes through the air, stabbing the wood directly in front of Conny as he freezes.
It was a knife. A fucking butter knife. Why the hell the Captain and his lover keep a butterknife next to them on the bed is something Eren doesn’t want to know.
“Since none of you lot have tongues,” Levi speaks. He’s not going to get an explanation soon. “We’ll discuss punishment later. For now,” He stands up, grabbing a still flustered Eren by the collar and dragging him towards the door, pushing out the rest of the team as well.
Eren doesn’t have time to be relieved about the fact that Captain Levi was not, for a fact, naked and was wearing black boxers. He was too busy getting pushed out the Captain’s bedroom and dragged through the office before finally getting thrown out into the hallway.
“For now, you leave me alone. I have a meeting to attend to.”
Levi slams the door shut at his awestruck soldiers, breathing in a frustrated sigh as he rests his hand on his forehead. He was getting a headache. He feels arms wrap around him from behind, hands resting on his chest. He sighs once more, this time in content, as he leans into your touch.
“Hey,” you kiss neck. “Thought you said you locked the door.”
“I did.” He turns around, still in your arms, and gently places his hands on your face as he kisses your nose. “Someone must’ve accidentally unlocked it when they were trying to grab onto something. Y’know, when they were getting fucked from behind.”
You chuckle. “Well, I’m sure that someone probably got sweet talked into getting fucked against the door.”
You break away from his arms after giving him a kiss, making your way back inside Levi’s bedroom, no doubt to get dressed for the meeting.
He stares at you as you walk, still naked and looking gorgeous. His face may be stoic but his heart was leaping, the gold ring on your left hand that matched his own glimmering in the light.
Your head peaks out from behind his bedroom door. “Round two before the meeting?” You ask cheekily.
Levi rolls his eyes as he makes his way to the bedroom as well, patting your bum as he passes by. “No. We’re already late.”
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Eren clutches the pillow to his head, exhausted from the laps he’d done. He glances around the room, eyeing the tired faces of his comrades.
As punishment for invading your privacy, Captain Levi assigned them laps around the base until sundown plus two weeks of stable duty. As punishment for invading his privacy, Captain Levi deemed them unworthy of having their own private space and made the entire squadron bunk together in the small room beside his own. 
Well, the entire squadron except for the Captain himself, at least.
Eren was pretty sure the room they were made to sleep in indefinitely was supposed to be a supply closet of some kind, but it fitted enough bunk beds for the entire team and was deemed a worthy location to carry out the rest of their punishment.
“How long do we have to sleep here?” Sasha asked dreadfully, hands covering her ears in attempts to block out the noises coming from the other room. The sound of a squeaky mattress and a wooden bed slamming against the adjacent wall continued.
“Until we learn our lesson,” Jean quotes the Captain. He himself looked extremely tired but he wasn’t trying to cover his ears like the rest of them were, undoubtedly because he’d already given up on getting a good night’s rest if the bags underneath his eyes were anything to go by.
“I don’t even care how long we have to sleep here anymore.” Conny interjects tiredly. “I just want to know when they’ll ever stop.”
As if to prove his point, a moan is heard through the walls. The soldiers flinch, still not accustomed to the sound. Mikasa silently runs her hands through Eren’s hair to calm him down.
“They’ve been at it for hours,” Jean whispers in horror. “How much stamina do those two have?”
Armin sighs, the bags under his eyes feeling heavier by the second. “They’re elite soldiers who’ve trained for years. They have more stamina than all of us combined.”
The whole room heaves out a collective groan, finally accepting that they weren’t getting any sleep tonight. 
In the other room, Captain Levi bangs his fist against the shared wall. “Oi,” he calls out. “Shut up, you brats. We can hear you.”
Levi thrusts his hips, eyes glancing down at your pleasure-struck face as he grinds into you more. The action causes you to throw your head back and let out a desperate moan, finger nails scratch down his back. He grabs your hands to pin them to the sides of your head, leaning down to whisper “Not too harsh, darling. We don’t want you leaving marks now, do we?” He continues his pace, the bed’s wooden frame slamming against the wall as he once again speaks to his soldiers.
“We have thin walls, y’know.”
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siumerghe · 3 years
Text
My Ukrainian friends are writing on twitter about their experiences in a country that was peaceful yesterday and now turned into a war zone. When I see their posts I’m both scared for them - and relieved: they are posting means they are alive.
My husband’s relatives are being bombed by Russian troops. We can’t contact some of them.
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My husband’s father is dying from cancer. He’s been urgently hospitalized this week yet we can’t even travel there to see him, possibly for the last time!
Meanwhile in my native city in Russia (as well as in other Russian cities, big and small) people are being beaten and arrested for daring to protest against the war.
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(Photo by @merr1k on twitter)
My mother who is living alone in Russia was scared and crying during our last call. She never supported Putin, she never voted for him or for his political parties. Now she can’t stop watching the news, horrified. We haven’t seen each other since Covid, and now the EU borders for ordinary Russian citizens may be closed, as many countries start to deny them visas. It’s the Iron Curtain all over again, enforced from both sides.
There are many Russians who support this war - but many of them are against it! They protest on the streets, they donate to Ukrainian charities, they spread news on social media, they fight the official propaganda, they support their Ukrainian friends however they can. Look at #нетвойне and other Russian tags on twitter, FB and Instagram.
Russia =/= Putin!
Citizens of the Free World, demand actions from your politicians! This war must be stopped!
Asking for direct military support is useless, as Putin threatened to use nuclear weapons in case of third party military intervention.
Please, don’t demand sanctions that harm common people! There is a misconception - or, worse, a comfortable lie spread by some Western politicians - that if you put enough pressure on Russian citizens they will arise and remove Putin (while the EU can continue buying Russian oil and gas). What a bullshit! Just look at North Korea. Better yet, look at Belarus where people kept protesting en masse - yet Lukashenko is still there. And Lukashenko has only a tiny fraction of money, manpower and other resources that Putin has! 
To those who don’t know: Russians have been protesting against Putin for the last 10+ years at least! And every time the repressions hit them harder and harder, while the world continued to accept Putin as a legitimate and “non-toxic” leader. The world didn’t even think to boycott the Football Championship in Russia in 2018, despite this year hundreds of political activists were arrested or forced to flee the country - this was one of the darkest years for the Russian opposition. So, when Russians had strength to fight, the world didn’t care. And now, when all independent media are silenced, all opposition leaders are killed, jailed or had to flee, all their organizations are destroyed, and the special anti-riot police force is created and trained (in addition to the regular and special police), the world wonders why Russians don’t protest as actively as people in democratic Tbilisi or Amsterdam?!
A common citizen is helpless against armored soldiers and anti-riot vehicles. In Russia, those who go on the streets are being fired from work, expelled from universities, sentenced to pay huge fines that make them bankrupt, arrested and put in jail. Parents are threatened that their children will be taken from them. Women detained at protests experience sexual harassment and humiliations. If you as much as touch a policeman this is equal to assault and guarantees you several years in prison. And modern Russian prisons are worse than Gulag: in Gulag prisoners were forced to work, in modern Russia they are tortured and raped for money and fun. So yeah, people are afraid, many feel helpless. Yet many in Russia still have courage to protest!
If you demand sanctions against Russia insist on those that either stop money influx for Putin so that he won’t be able to pay his troops and continue the war, or create pressure on his close circle so that they would off him or remove from power.
EU, stop buying Russian gas and oil! This is the main source of Putin’s power. The war in Ukraine is funded by European money! It’s been 8 years since the conflict in Ukraine has started, yet you continued to pay him all these years! First you make Putin the richest dictator on Earth - and then you hope that Russian plumbers, teachers, housewives and teenagers overthrow him?! What a joke! Instead, ask the Netherlands to open Groningen gas field again. It is the largest natural gas field in Europe and one of the largest in the world - you don’t have to depend on Russian gas to warm your homes!
UK, you’ve been for years thriving on investments from corrupt Russian officials, your capital is their biggest laundromat, they own palaces, newspapers, football clubs, businesses and what not, London is their second home so that their children don’t even speak Russian, some of your politicians are known to receive bribes from Russian oligarchs and Putin’s friends! Don’t tell me you didn’t know that these money are dirty! Perhaps, it’s time to investigate?! And not only in UK, but in Switzerland, Italy, Germany and other EU countries as well?!
I understand people’s anger but please don’t harass ordinary Russians living abroad, don’t destroy or boycott their small businesses. They chose to live and work abroad precisely because they don’t support Putin’s regime! Many of them literally HAD TO flee, despite their will - because of their political views or sexual orientation.
Many Ukrainian citizens are ethnical Russians. Many Russian citizens are ethnical Ukrainians. Many are of the mixed descent. Even President Zelensky’s native language is Russian! Are you sure you are harassing the right person?! (*that’s sarcasm as harassment is never ok*) Yesterday two of my friends living together in Czechia had their nameplates on the house splashed with red paint - yet one of them is Russian, the other is Ukrainian, and both are against the war!
If you want to be of REAL help for Ukraine:
- Donate to Ukrainian charities! - Demand actions from your politicians! - Help Ukrainian refugees! - Ask your governments not to close borders for Ukrainians! - Spread information on social media - but ALWAYS FACT CHECK! Be extra-careful for misinformation. - NEVER spread information about movements of Ukrainian troops! If you see such posts - either ask to remove them or report. - Don’t spread hate: by doing so, you are alienating Russian population and play in favor of Putin’s propaganda! Everyone who is against this war should stand united now, no matter ethnicity or citizenship!
We are living in a nightmare now, but this nightmare has to stop and never be repeated! Peace for Ukraine! And freedom for Russia!
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tomurasprincess · 4 years
Text
Kinktober Day 03: Watersports (Desperation)
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Day 03: Watersports Title: Desperation Pairing: Shigaraki x Reader Word Count: 2k Warnings: Noncon, omorashi, watersports (both pissing AND being pissed on), humiliation, degradation (like, seriously A LOT), choking, yandere Note: I have reasonable friends who talked me out of the yellow water banner I was going to use because I am clearly a mature adult. But I will not be persuaded on my yellow dripping piss font.
Kinktober Masterlist
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“Alright guys, I’ll be right back,��� you tell your friends, having to raise your voice to be heard above the booming techno music of the club. “Gotta go to the bathroom.”
“I guess someone drank a bit too much,” your friend giggles a bit as she sways on her feet. Several people from your hero agency have all come to celebrate the successful capture of a villain you’ve all been pursuing for months, a member of the notorious League of Villains. Things got just a bit out of hand, and you’ve all had too much to drink.
You stand up, grabbing briefly onto the bar before you right yourself and head to the bathroom. The bathroom is hard to find, far away from the main dance floor, and in the time it takes you to find it, your need becomes much more urgent as all the alcohol catches up with you.
If you were less drunk and more alert, you would have already noticed the red eyed, blue haired man who has been watching you the whole night. But you’ve barely been paying attention to anything but drinking and dancing, and so nothing seems amiss as you enter the bathroom, being closely pursued by the man who finally sees the opportunity to get you alone.
It isn’t until you enter the women’s bathroom that you realize there’s a problem. The door abruptly closes behind you, lock clicking loudly through the close quarters of the room. You whirl around, just a bit unsteady on your feet and meet the eyes of the man blocking the door.
You recognize him immediately. After all, you’re a pro-hero, and he’s been in the news for multiple attacks as Japan’s most wanted criminal. The leader of the villain you just helped to capture and arrest
Although you’re in absolutely no shape to fight him off, you don’t intend to go down without at least trying. You stand up straight, waiting for him to rush you, preparing every muscle to spring into attack the second he moves. But even being prepared for an attack doesn’t do you any good. You’ve always heard how fast Shigaraki moves, but you’re still taken by surprise as he crosses the length of the bathroom so quickly that you can barely see him, pinning you roughly against the wall.
“Little hero, it’s really not smart to be this drunk, you know,” he snorts derisively. “Especially not as a hero who just captured one of my members.”
Shit, shit shit, you curse to yourself, he knows that you’re responsible. Although you knew it was a long shot, you were still hoping this was a chance meeting, a complete accident. But now you realize that Shigaraki has probably been stalking you for a while.
He sees the realization on your face and laughs at you. “Yeah, I know exactly who you are, hero,” he spits the word hero out like it’s a curse. “And I decided to follow you and teach you a bit of a lesson on what happens when you fuck with the League of Villains.”
And with that, he wraps a hand around your neck, pinky raised barely above your skin as he begins to tighten his grip. You grab at his wrist as you try to pry him away, but it’s no use. You’re too drunk and he’s too strong, and you accomplish nothing but beating your fists uselessly against his arm.
Just when you’re beginning to see stars, about to pass out from the lack of oxygen, he releases you. You take gulping gasps of air as you steady yourself against the wall, hand flying up to touch your neck gently. You wince a bit at the burning sensation where his fingers dug deep into your skin and left marks.
Your eyes snap to his in confusion as to why he let you go, and you ask the question you’re afraid to know the answer to. “Are you - going to kill me?” You try to sound more confident, like the hero that you are. But you fall short, and Shigaraki smirks at your worried tone.
“No, I don’t think so,” he murmurs as his eyes roam down your body with a look of pure lust. “I’ve thought of something so much better than that.”
You instantly try to make a break for it while he’s not holding you in place, but he simply uses his hips to shove you back, grinding what is a quickly hardening erection against you before he pulls you in for a heated kiss. The kiss is more of a battle of dominance than anything else, one that you quickly lose as he overpowers you. His hand tangles into your hair, pulling you closer as he uses teeth to bite into your lip while his hand runs down your body. He grabs your dress in one hand, all five fingers touching the material, and you let out a sharp gasp as you watch the fabric turn into ash, leaving you in nothing but a bra.
“No panties? Fucking hero slut, were you expecting to get some cock tonight?
You shake your head back and forth, your confidence as a hero quickly failing you with every single thing this villain does and says. “N-no, of course not,” you stumble over your words. “I just -”
“Just what? Just wanted to show this pretty little pussy off to everyone?” He reaches down to cup you between your legs, finger dipping down below your slit to gently graze his finger over your clit. You buck a bit, trying to get out of his grasp, but he forces you roughly back against the wall. “Because I certainly saw it when you were sitting at that bar, presenting yourself to every person who walked through like a bitch in heat.”
Your bra is the next to go as he decays it like he did your dress. You feel the burning rush of shame as you stand completely naked in front of him.
You’re trembling now, both from his words and the fact that he’s continuing to graze your clit every so often, enough that you feel a brief stab of pleasure but not enough for anything else. You keep shaking your head, unable to find the words to refute his statements.
“Just admit it, hero,” he murmurs almost gently into your ear, “you wanted something like this to happen.”
“I - no, please stop, I don’t want this,” you plead, but you know that it’s not going to stop him from doing what he wants to you.
His finger goes slightly lower to slide into your entrance, curling up to hit a sensitive spot on your inner walls. You can’t contain the moan that slips out, pussy involuntarily clenching down around his finger.
“Shit, you’re fucking soaked and I haven’t even done anything to you. You really are a bitch in heat, aren’t you?”
He begins to aim for the spot that had you moaning, and once he finds it again, he doesn’t relent. You try to grab his hand and pull him away, but he grabs your wrist and slams it against the cold wall, causing you to whimper at the pain shooting out. It was then that you realized something horrible.
You still have to pee, and every movement he makes inside of you only causes it to get stronger. You begin to writhe even harder, crossing your legs as tightly as you can as you desperately try to hold it.
“What’s the matter, hero?” He mocks you in a cruel tone. “You’ve been drinking a lot tonight, and I bet you’re starting to feel it.”
“No no, please, please just let me go,” you whimper as you clamp your inner muscles down, squirming away to try and relieve the pressure.
But in your distraction, Shigaraki has unzipped his pants, and he forces you to bend over the counter as he strokes his cock in one hand. Your nipples are pressed against the cold surface, causing them to quickly harden as you shiver from the cold.
Something thick and hard prods against your entrance, and you try to brace yourself for what you know is about to happen.
It’s not as if there’s a damned thing you can do about it.
When he begins to push inside, a groan tears from both of your throats as he slides in inch by inch. You’re embarrassed to realize that he was right when he said how wet you are, as there’s not even any pain as his thick cock bottoms out inside of you.
The desperate need to pee is even more intense now, causing tears to run down your face as you throw away what little pride you have left.
“Please, I have to -” you trail off, too embarrassed to finish your sentence.
“Have to what? I can’t help if you won’t tell me,” his malicious tone contrasting with the soft words.
I have to pee,” you whimper pathetically, “please let me pee.”
“Then go,” he chuckles darkly, “I’m not stopping you. In fact -”
He reaches around to press down on your bladder, causing you to squeal as a small trickle of pee dribbles out. “I’ll even help you. Aren’t I so nice, hero?”
He begins to pound into your pussy, pushing down on your bladder in time with every thrust. Your crying does nothing but encourage him to go faster and press down even harder on your stomach.
Finally, you can’t hold it anymore, and you let out a choked sob as your bladder releases, hot piss running down your legs and drenching Shigaraki’s pants. He lets out a low groan at you pissing all over his cock, reaching down into the stream to get his hand wet.
He begins to increase his pace, reaching down with the hand covered in your own urine to rub tight circles against your clit.
He grabs your hair, keeping one finger far away as he forces your back to arch and stare into the mirror at yourself.
“See how ruined you look?” He growls as he makes you look into the mirror at yourself. Your makeup is smeared from your crying, eyeliner running down your face. Your hair is an absolute mess, and there’s a four fingered handprint around your neck where he choked you.
“Please please please, don’t, I don’t want this, please,” you babble the words almost incoherently as his fingers grind hard against your swollen bead, cock continuing to hit your g spot with every thrust.
The pleasure finally overwhelms you and you cum with a strangled wail, pussy fluttering wildly around his cock. Your orgasm sends him over the edge, barely able to pull out of you before he’s shooting ropes of cum against your back. He strokes himself through his orgasm, milking his cock out all over your skin.
“Aww, it’s okay, hero,” he coos maliciously at you, “don’t you feel better now?”
His gaze turns contemplative as he seems to think of something, his eyes lighting up with amusement. “You know, since I helped you, don’t you think you should help me?”
You’re too out of it to realize what he means until you feel hot liquid splashing against your back. You meet his eyes in horror, only for him to smirk at you. “It’s only fair, isn’t it?”
He grabs you and flips you to your front as he also covers your tits, waiting until he’s completely finished before he tucks his cock back into his pants.
You have never felt as humiliated as you do right now, bent over a bathroom counter by a villain, shivering and covered in piss and cum. Your look of utter defeat causes Shigaraki to laugh.
“This is what you get when a pathetic level 1 hero goes against someone like me,” he sneers at you as he begins to walk to the door. “If you decide to try something like that again, I’ll just have to come back for you.”
He gives a dark chuckle as he glances back at you one last time.
“Or maybe I will anyway.”
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✧༝┉┉┉┉┉˚*❋ ❋ ❋*˚┉┉┉┉┉༝✧ Kinktober Taglist: @ichor-and-symbiosis, @thewheezingwyvern, @vixen-scribbles, @katsukisprincess, @hisoknen, @leeswritingworld,  @milojwrites​, @kittycatkrissa, @reinawritesbnha, @yanderart, @dabilove27, @fae-father, @anxietyplusultra, @flutterfalla, @angmarwitch, @nereida19, @babayaga67, @fromsunnywithlove, @dabis-kitten, @bakugos-cumsock, @yumeneji, @the-grimm-writer, @iwaizumi-chan, @slashersheart, @cissiewrites, @bunnyywritings, @bakarinnie, @lucygucy123, @angie-1306, @emplosion22, @lalalemon101, @videogameboiwhowins, @armoredashley, @f4nficbaby, @sky-robin, @baroque-baby, @bbyspiiice, @celeroki, @jubilee40, @tenkoshimmy, @khemz1312,  @thirsthourdemon, @stqrlxt, @sanemitiddies, @lulu3mon, @xkatiex, @miraclefons, @thirstyforthem2dmen
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bluejayblueskies · 3 years
Text
can i be gentle?
Words: 7.1k
Relationships: Jon & Tim, Tim & Martin
Tags: Canon Divergence, Tim Lives, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Whump, Post-Unknowing, Injury Recovery
Warnings: suicidal thoughts/ideations, blood, injury, hospitals and hospitalization, survivor's guilt, body horror, minor gore, gun and knife violence, mentions of death, mentions of canon-typical worms, implied child abuse, meat, alcohol, swearing, crying, smoking
Ao3 link in source
.
Tim aches. It’s full-body, radiating through his arms and back and legs, and he wishes more than anything that he could go to sleep, to chase away the pain for at least a little while. It feels like he’s been hit by a bus.
 Or been on the receiving end of several kilos of C4 igniting all at once. But that metaphor’s a bit too on-the-nose, in his opinion.
 He should be dead. He should be dead. 
 (Does he wish he were dead? He hadn’t cared, in those few moments of clarity before he pushed the button on the detonator and the colors solidified into black nothingness, whether or not he would wake up when the smoke cleared. It’s hard to tell. He’d attached so much of himself to revenge, before, when it was easier than feeling everything else bubbling up underneath, and now that it’s been ripped away from him, he doesn’t know what emotion should be filling the gap. Probably relief.
 He doesn’t feel relieved.)
 The nurse is speaking to him. Her lips are moving, but he can’t hear her. His ears ring and ring and ring, and it sounds like spirling, mocking laughter.
 They do some tests. Blast-induced hearing loss, the pamphlet they give him proclaims. Prognosis is good. Most patients recover in 6 weeks. Hearing aids can help with high frequencies.
 His ears ring and ring and ring, and he’s alive.
 He’s alive.
 Jon is not.
 .
.
.
 “It’s because of him, you know.”
 Martin startles badly at Tim’s voice. Tim wonders if it had been too loud; the ringing in his ears is incessant, and every word spoken sounds as if it’s coming from a very, very far distance. He moves a bit further into the room that they’ve placed Jon in, his hands shaking where they grip the wheels of the wheelchair they’d given him. Hard to walk when your leg is shattered. And some ribs as well. 
 Martin says something, Tim thinks, as he’s turning. His eyes are wide and rimmed with red, and he’s looking at Tim expectantly. Tim sighs, then winces as the motion sends tendrils of pain through his ribcage. “I can’t hear you, Martin. Either speak up—way, way up—or just… move your lips more or something. I don’t care.”
 “What?” Martin enunciates, and it’s so ridiculous, Tim wants to cry.
 He answers anyway.
 “Me. Being here. I’m alive because… because of him.”
 It was stupid, thinking he could protect Tim from an entire building collapsing on top of them. But his hand had gripped Tim’s wrist and he’d pulled him to the floor and he’d covered Tim’s body with his own, so when the shock wave had hit, Jon had gotten the worst of it.
 Tim refuses to feel guilty about it. He does anyway. Because they’d argued, and Jon had stalked him, and Tim had cultivated his anger and fear into a simmering ember deep in his chest, but at the end of the day, Tim wasn’t supposed to survive.
 Jon was.
 Tim swallows, hating the bitter taste in his mouth, and says, “Do you… do you think he’s going to wake up?”
 Martin says something, too softly for Tim to hear. His mouth twists into something small and pained, and he looks at the floor.
 It’s answer enough.
 Tim doesn’t ask again. 
 .
.
.
 They arrest Elias a few hours later, after Martin’s collected himself enough to bring his plan to completion. Tim’s only regret is that he isn’t able to see the look on Elias’s face as he’s dragged away.
 Knowing Tim’s luck, he’d probably have just looked smug.
 The name Peter Lukas crosses Martin’s lips, spelled out in exaggerated motions when he visits Tim again. Tim thinks, absurdly, of the hydra. Cut off one head, two grow back.
 Lukas probably won’t be better. Knowing their luck, he’ll be much worse. But Tim thinks of the way Melanie had shaken after she’d come out of Elias’s office, of the haunted look in Martin’s eyes when Tim had asked how his plan went, and can’t find it within himself to care.
 .
.
.
 They release him from the hospital with a hefty prescription of pain meds, small plastic hearing aids tucked in each ear, and a thick folder of discharge papers. Martin’s there when they do; the bags under his eyes are dark and smudged, and he nods mechanically as the nurses talk to him, outlining Tim’s care regime for the next few weeks. His eyes keep flicking to the side, to the corridor that leads to the long-term care section of the hospital. Wordlessly, Tim reaches over and takes Martin’s hand in his, giving it a single squeeze before holding it tightly.
 Martin lets out a breath through his nose and squeezes back.
 “Do you want me to, er. To take you back to yours?” Martin asks once they’re out, his voice on the softer side of muffled and overlaid with that constant ringing but audible enough now that he doesn’t have to shout. 
 Tim feels something almost like embarrassment curling in his stomach. “I, uh. I don’t have a place anymore.” Tim drums his fingers on his thighs, looks at the ground, and says, “I canceled my lease. About a week before we left for Great Yarmouth.”
 There’s silence between them—or at least, as close to silence as Tim can get right now. Tim thinks Martin says something, a word or two brushing up against the edges of what the hearing aids allow him to hear, but he can’t grasp any of it. So, Tim looks up at Martin, at the pinched, pained expression on his face, and says, “Don’t pretend like you didn’t know.”
 “Know what?” Martin says bitterly. “That you never expected to come back? Yeah, I got that part. I even got why, you know? Doesn’t make it better, though. I didn’t want to lose you, Tim.” Martin pauses, then says, so quietly Tim can barely hear it, “I didn’t want to lose anybody.”
 “Yeah,” Tim says. But that’s not how this works. We were never going to all survive. Everything is fucked, and it still is, and it always will be.
 “I’m sorry,” he says and finds he means it. Then, to clarify: “For hurting you. And… and for Jon.” He doesn’t elaborate on that point. He doesn’t know what he would say even if he tried. “But I’m not sorry for going, and I’m not sorry for pressing that button. If I would have died, I wouldn’t have been sorry for that either.”
 “Right,” Martin says slowly. “But you didn’t. And the Circus is gone now, so do you…?”
 “Do I still want to kill myself?”
 Martin winces.
 “Hey, your question, not mine,” Tim says, holding his hands up in a defensive gesture. After a moment, his hands drop back to his lap, and he gives a small shrug. “Don’t know. I knew I would do what I needed to in order to destroy the Circus, and I did. Thought I would die in the process, but I didn’t. I’m still trapped in the world’s shittiest job, and I don’t really…”
 Tim shrugs again. “I don’t know,” he repeats. Then, because it feels true: “It was never… it was never the dying bit I was chasing, you know. I didn’t do this because I thought it would be a good way to get killed. I did it for Danny, and that’s it. Plain and simple. So if you’re asking if I want to die, the answer is no. But I can’t guarantee that I won’t make the same decision again if I have to.”
 Martin’s quiet for a long moment. Then, calmer than Tim expects, he says, “Okay.”
 “Okay,” Tim echoes. Then, with a levity that only feels slightly forced: “I suppose it’s back to your place, then. Just be sure to buy me dinner first.”
 Martin doesn’t smile at that like he used to, but his face does soften a bit. His voice is lighter when he says, “Oh, I will. Within your dietary restrictions, that is. Which means no alcohol.”
 Tim groans. “You’re no fun.”
 “Uh huh.”
 They begin the commute back to Martin’s flat, and the atmosphere between them grows more lighthearted than it’s been in months. Tim feels something warm and familiar curl in his chest, and he realizes just how much he’s missed this. It’s not quite easy conversation, not like it used to be, but it’s nice all the same.
 Tim’s ears ring, and his entire body aches, and he still feels a numbness in his core in the shape of suspicious glances and calliope music and a face he can’t remember, but for the first time in a long, long time, he allows himself to smile.
 .
.
.
 Tim doesn’t visit Jon often. At first, it’s the guilt, acute and cloying and weighing him down. Then, it’s old hurt and stale anger, resurfacing and driving away any passing thought of Jon that isn’t tinged with bad memories and broken trust. After that, it’s just habit.
 It also hurts, if he lets himself admit it. To see Jon lying there, motionless and clad entirely in white, the heart monitor attached to him reading out a constant horizontal line even as his eyes move in small, jerky motions behind his eyelids. 
 See? a part of him whispers. He’s not human. Maybe he never was. Maybe he was always a monster, and you just never noticed. It wouldn’t be the first time.
 A newer part of him, one that gets more prominent by the day, recognizes that even if Jon isn’t human anymore, he never would have chosen this. This stasis, this half-death. Not what came before, either. That part of him remembers the way Jon’s hand had gripped his tightly as they’d opened that trapdoor, and how it had continued to do so even as the worms had begun to bite into their skin. He’d tried to protect Tim then, too, putting himself between Tim and Jane Prentiss. For all the good it did, when the worms began to come from all directions. But Tim remembers the way the terror and pain in Jon’s eyes had been tinged with sadness, with a silent apology as he gripped Tim’s hand hard enough to bruise and they both accepted that this was it.
 It hadn’t been, in the end. And now it is, with Jon all-but-dead and Tim still here, wheeling his way into Jon’s hospital room for the first time in weeks. 
 He’s halfway in before he realizes he’s not alone.
 “Oh,” he says. “I… I didn’t know you’d be here.”
 Martin lets out a sharp, jagged laugh. “Where else would I be?” he says, and it’s tinged with something bitter and broken that takes Tim a bit off-guard. It’s become almost routine now, for Martin to visit Jon, and usually, he comes back looking drained but otherwise fine. Sometimes, when Tim asks him for status updates on our resident medical mystery, Martin even manages a small smile and responds, still dreaming.
 Martin scrubs a hand across his face, and Tim realizes belatedly that he’s crying.
 “Martin?” Tim says carefully, moving a bit closer to where Martin’s sitting. “Are you… did something happen?”
 “No,” Martin says, his voice catching in a way that indicates that something very much did happen. “It’s fine.”
 “Is it…?” Tim pauses, worrying his bottom lip between his teeth. “Is it about Jon?”
 Martin’s laugh this time is more like a whimper. “Nope, he’s- he’s the same as always. Still asleep.”
 Tim moves closer but doesn’t say anything. The clock ticks rhythmically in the background, and he waits. Patience has never been his strong suit, but it’s been something that’s been required of him as of late, and he’s getting better at it.
 He likes to think he’s getting better at a lot of things.
 Martin doesn’t speak again for a few minutes. He stares at his hands where they rest just shy of one of Jon’s, his fingers restless against the sheets, coming up occasionally to fiddle with the thin black ring that rests on the middle finger of his right hand. Then, so quiet Tim almost can’t hear it, he says, “My mother died today.”
 Oh.
 “I’m sorry,” Tim says. They’re empty words, but they’re better than the good riddance and about time and you’re better off without her sitting on the back of his tongue, begging to be released. He doesn’t think they would be appreciated right now, no matter how true they might be.
 “Yeah,” Martin says. He’s still staring at his hands. “They called me a few hours ago. She… she passed away in her sleep. Natural causes. From- from her illness.” He falls silent for a few moments, his fingers twisting in the sheets. Then: “I… I think I should be sad?”
 Tim studies Martin’s face—the tear tracks down his cheeks, the unhappy set to his mouth, the way he’s shaking ever so slightly where he sits. His face is one of grief, but Tim doesn’t ask. He waits for Martin to continue, and after a moment, Martin says, “She was the only family I had left. She- she was my mother. I took care of her, I- I did my best to be a- a good son.” He takes in a shaky breath, curls his hands into fists, and says, “I haven’t seen her in months, you know. I- I visited at first, but she… she never wanted to see me. So I just stopped going. I’d call, every Saturday, but it was the same every time. She’s resting. She doesn’t feel up to talking right now. Call later, and we’ll see what we can do.” 
 Finally, Martin looks at Tim, and the guilt in his eyes is so acute Tim can feel it cut through him to his core. “I should be sad that she’s dead, but… but all I can feel is relief. And that hurts. I- I don’t know… why am I relieved? God, she was right, I- I’m horrible, no wonder she- she never wanted to see me, I- why can’t I- I can’t—”
 Martin cuts off with a wet sob, and all at once, Tim understands.
 “It’s okay,” he says, and he collects Martin’s hands from the sheets, holds them tightly in his own. “You can feel however you like, it’s- it’s okay.”
 He squeezes Martin’s hands, just once, and repeats, “It’s okay.”
 He knows Martin won’t believe him. But still, he sits, and Martin cries, and he says, It’s okay.
 It’s okay.
 .
.
.
 The hearing aids are a permanent fixture in his ears now, as most people have full hearing restoration after six weeks apparently doesn’t include him. The tinnitus is still particularly bad some days, but they help with everything else. It’s not perfect, but it’s a small price to pay for living, he supposes.
 He’s not sure when, exactly, he decides that he’s glad he’s alive. But he does. 
 He wishes he hadn’t been able to hear at all, when the Flesh attacks. He wishes he hadn’t been able to hear the wet, sticky sounds of things that shouldn’t be able to move without bones slipping through the vents, shattering the relative peace they’d begun to cultivate. He wishes he hadn’t been able to hear the pops of Basira’s gun, bullets burying themselves in things that barely flinched at the contact. He wishes he hadn’t been able to hear Melanie’s screams of anger, the responding screams of pain from things with too many eyes and teeth and limbs as her knife carved a violent path through them.
 There are yellow doors and hands slick with blood and a sudden quiet as the last of the twisted, mangled creatures falls, sliced neatly in two in a way that’s just a bit too clean. 
 Melanie is breathing heavily, but her hands are steady and her eyes are hard with something raging and violent. When Basira reaches tentatively for her knife, saying, “It’s over now, Melanie. We’re- we’re safe,” Melanie stiffens but doesn’t resist.
 “This isn’t right,” Tim says after Melanie comes back to herself in bits and pieces, enough to shudder at the blood coating her arms up to the elbows and mutter something he can’t quite catch before disappearing into the toilet. “None of this is. God, can we ever catch a fucking break?”
 “We can deal with it later,” Basira says. She’s calm, but she can’t quite hide the tremor in her voice. Her Al-Amira is splattered with viscera. “Right now, we need to make a call. Get this cleaned up.”
 “What,” Tim says bitterly, “so we can continue hiding away in the Archives? You’re the one who said we should start sleeping here. Should have known it wouldn’t be safe. It’s not like it was before.” 
 He rubs at one of the small circular scars on the back of his left hand, his skin crawling with a phantom itch that makes him vaguely nauseous. 
 “We stay here,” Basira says, leaving no room for debate. “We make the call, and we stay here.”
 Tim makes a low, frustrated noise, and bites out, “Fine. Because Basira always knows best. Whatever.” He unlocks his wheelchair and says shortly, “I’m going outside for some fresh air. The smell of rotting meat is making me sick.”
 Basira doesn’t follow him.
 Martin does.
 They situate themselves just outside the glass doors, and they don’t say anything for a long time. Martin still looks vaguely ill. His face is pale, and his hands are fidgeting at his sides. His fingers are resting on his ring, twisting it back and forth, agitated. His shoes are stained a glistening red.
 Finally, Martin tilts his head back so it hits the wall behind him and says to the air above him, “Is it horrible that I wish Jon were here?”
 Tim snorts, anger still bubbling under the surface of his skin. “Because we’d have done so much better with our own flavor of spooky bullshit?” He bites out a bitter laugh. “Maybe he could have compelled them to explain exactly why every single monster out there has a personal vendetta against us. Working for an eldritch horror of voyeurism doesn’t give you much in terms of an offense.”
 “Stop,” Martin says sharply. “You know what I mean.”
 Tim does. He’s just not particularly inclined to wax nostalgic about the power of friendship and comradery when he’s got bits of meat stuck in his hair. 
 Still, he finds that he means it when he says, “I wish he was too. For what it’s worth. Which isn’t a fucking lot, but it’s what we’ve got.”
 “Yeah,” Martin says. His hand brushes against Tim’s, and they fall back into silence.
 The police arrive, followed closely by the ECDC. It’s a messy affair, even messier than the last time Tim had been in this situation, and Tim wants nothing more than to get away. Forever.
 He doesn’t make any jokes this time. He just nods in the right places, and when they’re finally released and he and Martin return to a flat they haven’t seen in weeks, he can feel weariness cutting through him to the bone.
 When he wakes the next day, Martin’s gone. His note, stuck to the door of the fridge, says, At the hospital. Be back around noon.
 It’s ten in the morning, and the sunlight is bright as it streams in through the kitchen window.
 Tim digs out the bottle of rum that Martin keeps tucked in the back of his cabinet and pours himself a drink.
 .
.
.
 “Peter Lukas wants me to be his assistant.”
 Tim looks up from what’s turning out to be quite an impressive doodle of the little figurine of a frog in a top hat he’d purchased back in research from a charity shop and says, “Absolutely not.”
 Martin sucks his bottom lip between his teeth, holds it there for a moment, and then says, “I don’t know if I have a choice in the matter, really. It’s… it’s not safe here anymore.” Quieter: “He said he can help. Off- offer protection.”
 Tim audibly scoffs at that. He sets down his pencil and notepad and crosses his arms across his chest. He can already feel a headache coming on. (More than the usual, that is. He’s almost able to tune out the constant ringing in his ears now.
 Almost.)
 “What’s he going to do, isolate them to death? It’s not like the Lonely’s any better of an offensive force than the Eye. We’re doing just fine without involving him.”
 “Are we?” Martin’s voice is hard and a bit choked when he continues, “We’re living down here because it’s not safe to stay outside for too long. We’re still finding bits of- of flesh in- eugh.” Martin shudders and folds inward on himself. Quieter, enough so that Tim has to watch the motion of his lips to make out the words, he says, “Jon’s not waking up.”
 Tim feels something inside of him twist. “We don’t know that. We don’t know what’s happening with him.” A touch bitterly—old habits die hard, he supposes—he says, “Maybe he’s just not done going through his monster metamorphosis yet.”
 “Tim.”
 Tim sighs. It’s a profoundly weary sound. “Yeah, yeah. I… I miss him too, you know.”
 He’s surprised to find that it’s not a lie.
 “Right.” A small, shaky smile crosses Martin’s face, and he says, “I- I suppose they’re right, then. Distance does make the heart grow fonder.”
 “Somehow,” Tim says, “I don’t think whoever coined that phrase had this situation in mind.”
 Martin’s smile fades as quickly as it had come, and Tim feels a pang of guilt. “Sorry,” he says, pushing away from the desk and wheeling across the room to where Martin sits. He hesitates, just a moment, before placing his hand on Martin’s where it rests on his knee. “I… I suppose I’ve forgotten how to be lighthearted about all of this.”
 Martin nods. It’s a small motion. He’s silent for a long moment; Tim squeezes his hand and says nothing. Finally, Martin looks down at his hands and says, “It’s been four months, Tim. Nothing’s changed.” He pauses again, his mouth pinching around the edges. “I… I visited him today. I begged him to wake up, to- to do anything to indicate that he’s even still there. I don’t know why I expected him to answer. It’s not like anything’s different now. He- he’s never going to wake up, Tim.”
 Martin’s voice cracks, and he repeats, wetly, “He’s never going to wake up.”
 Then, Martin’s crying, heaving sobs that overtake him completely and have him hunched over, dripping salty tears onto the back of Tim’s hand. “Hey, hey, hey,” Tim says, leaning forward as far as he’s comfortably able to and wrapping Martin in as hard of a hug as he can manage. He rubs his hands in circles across Martin’s shoulderblades, feeling Martin’s shaky breaths against the side of his neck, and says, “It’s okay. It’s okay.”
 He repeats it, again and again, as Martin cries into his shoulder and says, over and over, words thick with grief, “He’s dead, Tim. He’s dead.”
 “It’s okay,” Tim says. Maybe if he says it enough times, he’ll start to believe it.
 Eventually, Martin’s body stops shaking and he pulls back, the tear tracks on his cheeks already beginning to dry. His eyes are red-rimmed and glistening, and he looks tired, grief apparent in every line of him.
 “I said I’d think about it,” Martin says, in a voice rubbed raw and hoarse. “When Peter called me. I- I said I’d think about it. I- I don’t know why…” He cuts off, makes a small, distressed noise, and says, “What do I even have left? If- if this can help, what- what do I have to lose?”
 Tim feels a pang of hurt flash through him, but he suppresses it. He squeezes Martin’s hands, gives him as wide a smile as he can without breaking, and says, “You have me. And I’m not leaving—you’re stuck with me. So don’t think for a second that if you take Peter’s deal, I won’t be there still. I’m like a bad penny, or, I don’t know, a- a fungus or whatever. The point is, you’re not going to get rid of me. Whether or not you decide to work for Lukas—which you shouldn’t, by the way, in case I haven’t made that abundantly clear—you’re not going to be lonely, okay? Not on my watch. I can be very persistent when I put my mind to it.”
 Martin looks at Tim, eyes wide, and another small, hiccuping sob escapes him. “You really mean that?”
 “Yes, Martin,” Tim says, exasperation and fondness filling him in equal measure. “Christ, just because things got… rough for a bit, it doesn’t mean I stopped caring about you. Honestly, don’t know if I could. You’re a very lovable person, you know. It’s not like being your friend is a hardship.”
 Martin laughs a little at that, his voice still thick with tears. “Well, when you put it like that…”
 Tim gives him another smile, and this one feels easier. Like it would be harder not to smile. Still, he’s careful with his words when he says, “So, then. What are you going to do? I’ve made my opinion more than known, but…” Tim swallows around the lump in his throat and continues, “It’s your decision.”
 “Yeah,” Martin says, barely more than a whisper. “Yeah.”
 Peter calls again. And when Martin hesitates for a long moment before giving a quiet yet firm no, the relief that sweeps over Tim is enough to make him feel weightless.
 .
.
.
 Two months later, as a man who smells of death shuts the door behind him, Jon takes a rattling breath and finally opens his eyes.
 .
.
.
 “Tim?”
 Tim raises the hand that’s not holding a rather large bouquet of white daisies and baby’s breath in a half-wave. “Hi, boss. Been a while.”
 The look Jon gives him is half-shocked, half-nervous. “I… I suppose it has. Six months, apparently.”
 Tim makes a sound of affirmation before wheeling himself fully into Jon’s hospital room and letting the door swing shut behind him. “You know,” he says, allowing a blanket of levity to fall over him, “when we said you should get more sleep, this isn’t exactly what we meant.”
 Jon just stares at him for a moment, face blank and eyes wide. Then, a laugh escapes him, a small hiccup of amusement. “Yes, well. I can’t say that I feel particularly well-rested.”
 Tim imagines what it must have been like, to be locked in a dreamscape stasis for six months. He can’t say that the idea sounds particularly relaxing. “Yep, sounds about right. Guess we can cross ‘spooky coma’ off our list of possible cures for sleep deprivation.”
 Jon folds inward on himself a bit, hugging one arm to his chest and gripping the other tightly. “Right,” he says, his voice small. He looks away from Tim, focusing on the small window in the corner of the room, and says, “I… I’m sorry, Tim.”
 Right. Jon still thinks Tim hates him.
 Tim lets out a long, weary sigh and makes his way to Jon’s bed. He practically shoves the flowers into Jon’s hands; Jon takes them, more out of surprise than anything, white petals tickling the bottom of his chin. “It’s been six months, Jon. You’ve been… honestly, a bit dead? No offense. And I’ve been alive. And we both know it was meant to be the other way around.”
 Jon opens his mouth, and Tim holds up a hand. “Don’t. I know. I already hear enough about it from my therapist, I don’t need to hear about it from you too. The point is that I’ve… I’ve had time to think. And some of the things you did, I can’t forgive you for. But some of it…”
 Tim shrugs. “Martin would always go on about how it wasn’t your fault. About how you were suffering just as much as us. And maybe I didn’t believe it because I was already angry, or maybe I didn’t believe it because all I could think about was finally getting a chance at the revenge I’d chased after for years. But then you were gone, and the Circus was gone, and I just… didn’t have anything left for the anger to hold on to.”
 Jon clutches the flowers tightly in his hands, looks down at the petals. “But you were right,” he says quietly. “A- about me.”
 Tim casts himself back six months and sifts through a metric ton of bitter remarks and angry assumptions. “You’re going to have to be more specific.”
 Jon lets out a slow, shaky breath. “About me not being human.”
 Oh.
 “Jon—”
 “Do you know what I was dreaming about?” Jon cuts in before Tim can say anything else. “I- I don’t remember, not really, but… but I can guess. I… I Know, somehow, that- that they were the same dreams, over and over and over again.” Jon takes one of the flower petals between his fingers and rubs it back and forth, a nervous gesture. “I started having them soon after I took this job, you know. Naomi Herne was the first one, and I- I didn’t understand why. Every night, she was trapped in the fog, forced into her own grave, and I would try to move, because it- it felt like I should have been able to, but it- it never worked. So I… I stopped trying after a while. I would stand and watch as she relived one of the worst experiences of her life, every night, and I- I couldn’t do anything to stop it.”
 Jon crushes the petal between his fingers. “She was the first one, but- but there are so many more now. Lionel Elliott and Jordan Kennedy and- and, Christ, Georgie—”
 Jon makes a small, unhappy noise. “I don’t know when I realized that they could see me in their dreams too. That in trying to help, I- I’d just made myself another source of terror.”
 Jon falls silent for a few moments; the quiet is filled by the familiar tick tick tick of the clock in the corner. Then, so quietly Tim has to focus on his lips to catch the words, he says, “I… I think I made a choice. Before I woke up. I don’t… I don’t know what it means for me, not really, but I know it means that I’m worse than I was before.” He lets out a bitter laugh, devoid of any humor. “So, you were right. I’m just- just even less human now.”
 Jon falls silent again, and for a few moments, there’s just tick, tick, tick. Tim rolls the words over in his mind, looks at Jon’s pinched, unhappy expression, and says, “Okay.”
 Jon looks at him then, his brow furrowed in confusion. “Okay?”
 Tim shrugs and repeats, “Okay. You’re not human. I’m not going to pretend like that thrills me or whatever, but it’s… honestly, it’s a lot less of an issue for me now than it was back then.”
 “I- I don’t…” Jon trails off with a frustrated noise. “What?”
 Tim sighs. “A lot’s changed, Jon. Things have… well, things have kind of gone to hell. Honestly, we could use a few monsters who are on our side for a change.”
 Jon blinks at him in stunned silence for a few moments more before saying, bewildered, “... Right. Uh, I- I suppose I shouldn’t ask how you’ve been, then.”
 A wry smile cracks across Tim’s face. “I’ve been just peachy, thanks for asking. Blow up one Circus and suddenly every spooky monster out there wants to kill you. It’s been one big, long, horrible sleepover in the Archives. But hey, at least Elias isn’t there! Now we’ve just got Lukas, and if one or two staff members disappear every once and a while, well—that’s just how it is at the Magnus Institute. Nothing to be concerned about. Sometimes, we still go out for drinks.”
 “Tim,” Jon says flatly. The exasperated expression on his face is so familiar—so Jon—that Tim feels a tension he hadn’t known he’d been holding slip away. 
 “Yeah, yeah,” Tim says, waving a hand absently in Jon’s direction. “Point is, I’m not disappointed or angry or whatever that you’re back in the land of the living.” He pauses, and then, more sincerely: “Martin’s not the only one who’s missed you, okay?”
 Jon’s lips part into an O. Then, his mouth twitches up into a smirk, and he says, “Mm, you’re right. Basira did stop by earlier, and then of course Georgie, and I bet even Melanie—”
 “Unbelievable. And here I was nice enough to come all the way over here, to bring you flowers.”
 “Mm, they are very nice flowers.”
 “Damn right they are.”
 Jon smiles then, a fragile thing, and says, “Thank you, Tim. I… I’ve missed you too.”
 Tim could point out that Jon had been asleep for the majority of the time in question. But he knows that’s not what Jon means. So instead, he offers Jon a smile in return and says, “Be honest: more or less than the Admiral?”
 Jon shoots Tim a flat, unimpressed look. “Tim, don’t be ridiculous. Of course less than the Admiral.”
 .
.
.
 Tim’s been out of the wheelchair for a week when he finally manages to make his way to the roof of the Institute, still learning how to maneuver the crutches he’s moved on to. He swears he can feel every motion of the pins and the rods in his leg—skin covered with even more scars for the collection—as he finally heaves himself through the door and into the cool night air. 
 The view is just as good as he remembers.
 There’s the faint smell of cigarette smoke hanging in the air, and Tim’s entirely unsurprised to see Jon silhouetted against the glow of London, leaning against the wall that rings the roof with his back facing Tim. The cigarette glows a dull red as he raises it to his lips and breathes in.
 Jon doesn’t say anything, even as Tim painstakingly makes his way over to where he’s stood. Tim props his crutches against the wall before leaning his weight heavily against it, arms crossed atop the wall in a mirror image of Jon as they both look out onto the city below, humming with life and light.
 Finally, after a particularly long drag of his cigarette, Jon says, “I’m going to get Daisy.”
 There’s no room for argument in his voice. But that’s never stopped Tim from trying anyways. 
 “I thought you were done doing stupid shit that’ll get you killed,” Tim says, turning his head to look at Jon. Jon’s staring forward, but Tim gets the distinct impression that Jon isn’t looking out at the city at all.
 “It won’t kill me,” Jon says quietly. He moves his hands as he talks, surprisingly competent sign language that he’s begun using tentatively in his conversations with Tim. When Tim had asked him where he’d learned it, Jon had been quiet for a long moment before telling him that he hadn’t.
 Well. At least the Eye was being useful for once.
 “Yeah, whatever,” Tim says. “Dead or not, you’ll still be gone. You know people who crawl into that coffin don’t come back.”
 “I don’t—” Jon cuts off with a frustrated noise. After a moment, he continues, “I have a plan. I- I read a statement, and it said that I would need an anchor. A- a piece of myself to keep here. I can find it when I’m down there, and- and use it to guide me back.”
 “Right,” Tim says dryly. “Because our plans have always gone so well.”
 “What would you have me do, Tim? I- I can’t just do nothing.”
 “Why not?”
 Jon affixes him with an expression that’s half-affronted, half-stunned. “Tim.”
 “What? Jon, we barely know Daisy. She tried to kill you. No, don’t give me that look.” Tim jabs a finger in Jon’s direction. “You know I’m right.”
 “I…” Jon trails off. After a moment, he hugs his arms to himself, his snubbed-out cigarette still smoldering slightly on top of the wall. “I know. But I… I still have to go. I… I’m still going to go.”
 Tim exhales slowly and says, “Right. Suppose I should have expected that.”
 There’s silence between them for a moment. Then, Jon removes his hands from his arms and signs as he says, quietly, “Why don’t you hate me?”
 Tim stares at Jon for a long moment before saying, “What?”
 Jon sighs and repeats, the motions of his hands larger and more emphatic, “Why don’t you hate me? Basira and Melanie, they- they keep looking at me like I’m some… thing, and- and maybe I am. No, not… not maybe. I’m not… I’m not human anymore, and I- I know what you said, but what happens when I—?”
 Jon cuts off with a small, choked noise, like the air’s been sucked out of him all at once. Weakly, he signs, “I’m so hungry, all the time. What happens when I… when I can’t take it anymore? When I- I become dangerous, a- a monster, will you—?”
 Jon’s fingers curl into fists, and he drops his hands to his sides, angling himself away from Tim and staring at an arbitrary point in the distance. “It’s better this way,” he says, loudly enough that Tim can make out the words above the hum of London at night and the ever-present ringing in his ears. “I… I don’t want to go. I don’t want to lose this, to- to lose you and- and Martin. But maybe it’s better than becoming something that will hurt you.”
 Jon won’t meet Tim’s eyes. Carefully, Tim reaches across the space between them and takes Jon’s hand in his, uncurling Jon’s fingers gently in an attempt to release some of the tension. Slowly, he says, “You know, I… I shouldn’t be alive right now. Back after the Unknowing, when I woke up in the hospital, I… I didn’t want to be. It was supposed to be whatever it takes, and to me, that was always going to mean my death. Revenge and poetic justice and all of that. I should have died, but I didn’t. And… and you did. And it’s not something I feel guilty about, because we both made the same choice in the end, but that… that doesn’t stop me from feeling, sometimes, like it was my fault somehow.” He lets out a sharp laugh and says, “Well, I was the one to actually blow the place up in the end, but, you know.”
 Tim holds Jon’s hand carefully in his like it might break otherwise, the mottled texture of the scar tissue firm against his fingertips. His eyes find the thin white line slashed across Jon’s throat, the stark white bandage poking out from the collar of Jon’s shirt where it covers a fresh scalpel wound in his shoulder, the pale pink spots that pepper Jon’s skin in a mirror image of his own. He can’t see the splash of jagged scars across Jon’s back, a memory of shrapnel and white-hot explosions, but he knows they’re there. “You asked why I don’t hate you?”
 When Jon nods mutely, Tim says, “I just… ran out of reasons why I should. I still wanted to, but…” He shrugs and gives Jon a wry, humorless smile. “We’re all just stuck in the same shitty situation. And I guess at some point, I just decided that you hadn’t chosen to be here any more than I did.”
 “Oh,” Jon says, barely audible. 
 Tim takes Jon’s other hand in his, squeezes them firmly, and says, “And I’m sorry. Not for- for how we used to be, because I think the blame for that falls pretty evenly onto both of our shoulders, but… but for everything else. For what’s happened to you. Figured I’ve spent enough time feeling sorry for myself, I might as well extend you the same courtesy.”
 Jon’s fingers tighten around Tim’s, and he mumbles something Tim can’t quite catch. Then, he extracts his hands from Tim’s and signs, shakily, “I’m sorry too. For everything. But for what it’s worth, I… I’m glad you’re here. That you’re not dead. I- I know it’s been bad and- and I wish I could fix that, but I… I don’t know if I can.” Jon’s eyes when they meet Tim’s are sad but determined. “But I can fix this. I- I can get Daisy back. I can find my way out.”
 Tim looks at the firm set to Jon’s mouth, the furrow of his brow, and says, “Okay. But I’m going to hold you to that. Otherwise, I might have to go in after you.”
 Jon looks horrified. “Tim.”
 Tim holds his hands up in a placating gesture. “Hey, come back in one piece and we won’t have to worry about it.”
 Jon opens his mouth, then closes it again. There’s a long pause before he finally says, decidedly, “I will. I- I promise.”
 Don’t make promises you can’t keep, Tim wants to say. Instead, he shuffles closer to Jon and leans against the wall again, crossing his arms on top of it and looking out over the city. “Good,” he says softly. 
 After a moment, Jon shifts to face the city as well. His arm brushes against Tim’s, and Tim lets that point of contact ground him as he looks up and up and up at the stars above, pinpricks of light on a satin black sky. 
 “Thank you,” Jon says, just loud enough for Tim to hear. 
 Tim moves his hand to cover Jon’s where it sits on the wall and squeezes once. “Yeah.”
 They stand there until sunlight begins to tickle the edges of the horizon. And when Jon gives Tim’s hand one last squeeze, the other holding the lid of the coffin open, and says, “Be back soon,” Tim believes him.
 .
.
.
 Three days later, Jon climbs out of the coffin with dirt caked underneath his fingernails and a thin, sharp hand clutched in his. “Tim,” he says, and Tim ignores the pain in his leg as he lets his crutches drop to the floor and hugs Jon tightly.
 “Looks like I’m staying above ground after all,” Tim jokes, his voice light even as his words come out wet and choked.
 Jon’s laugh vibrates against Tim’s chest. “Yeah,” he says, burying his face in the fabric of Tim’s shoulder to hide his smile. “Yeah.”
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mdawritings · 3 years
Text
“Arrested” [Aaron Hotchner X Female Reader]
Fandom: Criminal Minds
Rating: E
Pairings: Aaron Hotchner/Female Reader
Wordcount: 8,510
Summary: 
The BAU is working a case in the DC area: an unsub killing women outside of nightclubs and bars. When you get arrested and manage to end up in the same precinct as Aaron Hotchner, the team discovers that their unit chief has been sleeping with a MUCH younger woman. Even more importantly, they discover that aside from being Hotch's fuck buddy, you have had direct contact with the unsub. Told through cute and smutty flashbacks throughout your relationship with Aaron.
AO3 Link
It had been weeks since you’d seen Aaron. The first week you didn’t see him was because of a case over the weekend in Florida. You had sent him a few scandalous pictures while he was flying home…
You rest your head against the arm of your sofa lazily. You reach for the phone and look at the simple text from Aaron. “On the way home now. I want to see you soon.” Just those words send bolts of happiness, excitement, and arousal through you. You press the top of your phone to your lips to suppress your growing smile. You text him back.
“Been imagining your hands touching me instead of my own”
Aaron picks up his phone at the chime. He reads the message from you and can’t help but start to stir a little. God, the thoughts of you home alone… touching yourself thinking about him. Yeah, that definitely does something to him. It’s not like you weren’t in his thoughts the entire time. It's difficult to focus on a case when all he really wants is to be home, buried under the covers with you, taking in your light, yet intoxicating perfume. Touching your soft, perfect skin. Hearing you scream his name… He almost lets out a moan but catches himself and looks around the jet at his sleeping coworkers.
He quickly replies to your message, “Oh yeah?”
You jump up from the couch, exhaustion rapidly dissipating from your previously sore limbs at the thought of seeing Aaron tonight. Memories of his large hands touching, groping, squeezing your body flood into your mind.
You hurry to slip on the purple lingerie set you bought. You stand in front of your bathroom mirror. You take a few minutes, capturing some, quite honestly, fucking amazing photos.
“Missing the feeling of you buried inside me” You send the photos along. You grow even happier at the thought of him getting a fucking hard-on while just a few feet away from his sleeping coworkers. You revel in the effect you manage to have over such a powerful, dominant, authoritative man. It makes you especially proud to think about his normal demeanor, stoic, hard-faced, serious, and how easy it is for you to reduce him to simpering, whimpering, moaning mess under your touch. Your phone chimes a mere seconds after sending the photos.
“You are torturing me. We HAVE to see each other when I land”
You fell asleep in your bed in that lingerie waiting for him. You didn’t see his messages until the next morning, saying the sitter for Jack fell through and he probably wouldn’t be able to see you until next weekend.
At the start of the second week, he got called away to a case in California. That one took up the whole week and by the time he got home, he was way too exhausted to spend time with you.
This kind of thing went on for two weeks. A full month without Aaron had been torture. It wasn’t like you expected him to drop everything and come running to you. You understand he has a kid to take care of and an FBI unit to run. Plus, it isn’t like you two are really dating. Do you sometimes wish you were? Hell yes. Is it reasonable or feasible? Absolutely not.
That doesn’t mean you don’t enjoy what you have going on right now. He comes over to your place, tired and frustrated from a long day at work, and he— well he fucks your brain out. You’re always working hard on your Ph.D. and Aaron’s job is just plain stressful. You both need and enjoy the amazing stress relieving benefits of casual sex. You do enjoy each other’s company without having sex sometimes. It usually happens on those weekends when you or he or both of you are way too exhausted. But really, it's the moments after sex that make you question what you truly are to one another…
Your heart rate begins to steady and you can’t help but smile up at Aaron. He looks down at you with that small Hotchner version of a smile. It’s a smile that wouldn’t seem like much to anyone else, but you know how infrequently he lets the corners of his mouth turn up in happiness. “How do you do it?”
You soon realize after letting the words out, (and from the confusion on his face), that he cannot, in fact, read your mind and understand what you mean, “How do you go from seeing all that bad out there in the world to lying in this bed with me with that adorable smile on your face?”
For a split second, you think you’ve said something wrong. The smile falls from his face and his brows tense up. You always tease him about his eyebrows, telling him the more he frowns the more wrinkles he’ll get.
“Sorry I didn’t mean to cross a line—”
“I don’t want to pull you into all this… my work. I want to protect you from it.” Your heart practically sinks into your stomach. That’s not the type of language you use with your casual sex partner. Then again, you’d be lying if you said you didn’t worry every time he leaves for a case. You worry that you’ll never see him again. You won’t even find out he’s dead because no one knows about the two of you.
“Y/N,” he pulls you out of your thoughts. His voice cuts through the silent room and you look back up into his soft eyes. They’re searching your face, scanning your behavior. You can tell he’s trying to figure out what you could possibly be thinking.
“Stop doing that,” you warn him, but your tone is light-hearted, “That whole studying my behavior thing you do.”
“Profiling,” he corrects you and runs a hand over your hair. The action is like a natural reflex for him, he’s not even consciously aware he’s pulling you closer to him.
“Right. That. Stop profiling me,” you laugh.
“Well, how am I supposed to know what’s spinning around in your head when you zone out like that.”
“I’m thinking about the fact that you listen to me rattle on and on about statistical physics but you don’t talk about your job.”
“You need to stop talking about physics after sex. It makes me feel like I’m sleeping with Reid,” he laughs and notices your confusion, “He’s a coworker of mine. You’d like him.”
You’d like him. That phrase sticks with you. Does that mean he wants you to meet his coworkers someday?
You’re not sure why you and Aaron never discuss a real relationship. Well, it’s more like Aaron never discusses a real relationship. Aaron doesn’t really discuss anything. The first time you really talked to him you thought his closed-off nature was charming, dreamy…
“Aaron Hotchner… right?” You look over the man who has just walked up to the bar next to you.
He reaches for the beers he’s just ordered, obviously for a group, but stops as you call out his name, “I’m sorry do I know you?”
“You work for the FBI… Behavioral something unit.” Your laugh sounds loud and obnoxious to you, but to him, it’s bright and cuts through the din of the chaotic bar.
“Behavioral Analysis Unit,” Aaron’s eyebrows furrow. He looks you over before turning his attention back to your face, searching it for answers.
“Oh god!” You're not really the type to strike up a conversation with a man in a bar but you’re feeling bold, not to mention empowered by the liquor, “I must seem so crazy. You gave a talk at Georgetown I attended. I’m a Ph.D. student there. It was about criminal psychology.” His face softens as he begins to realize you’re not a crazy stalker nor an obsessed fan. You stick your hand out for him to shake, “Y/N Y/L/N.”
“It’s nice to meet you, again, I guess,” He nods as he shakes your hand. You can tell he’s just trying to be polite and he glances over his shoulder at a group of people at a booth. Their eyes are all on you two. He wants to go back but something about you is drawing him in. “So you’re pursuing a Ph.D. in psychology?” He moves to sit at the bar next to you.
“Actually no.” You feel flush rushing into your face as he moves closer to you and sits down. You can’t help but look over his body. He’s much closer to your height now that he’s sitting down. He’s wearing a black quarter zip and dark jeans. His hair is neatly gelled back. He does not fit into this atmosphere. “I’m getting a Ph.D. in physics. I conduct theoretical research on the experimental implementation of quantum computing with trapped ions in— I conduct research.” Your blush deepens.
Aaron smiles widely at your ranting before jumping in, “So what were you doing in a criminal psychology lecture?”
Your face feels hot with embarrassment, “I snuck in. It sounded interesting.” You shrug slightly and reach for the drink from the bartender. “I almost didn’t show up, but then a classmate told me one of the FBI agents was very attractive.” You give a small wink before reaching for your check for your drinks from the night. “And she was right, Agent Prentiss is drop-dead gorgeous.” Your attempts to keep a poker face fail, your lips curling with delight.
Aaron laughs as he takes the check from your hands. “You don’t have to—” You protest slightly but Aaron holds up his hand to silence you.
“My treat. As a thank you, for breaking the rules to see my lecture.” He shares in your smile as he hands the bartender his card, paying for your drinks. Your ex just broke up with you a few weeks prior so you came out to cheer yourself up. Seeing Aaron Hotchner up close and personal is… definitely a pick me up.
“Do you have a business card or something?”
“Uh… yes.” Aaron is hesitant to hand it over but reaches into his wallet for one. You grab a pen and take the business card from Aaron. You scribble down your number on the back and hand it to him.
“This is my number.” You hold it out before reaching for your purse. He looks down at the number and then back up at you. For a grown, adult man, he doesn’t seem to understand. You can see confusion written all over his face, it’s quite adorable honestly. His face though it seemingly remains emotionless, in just the few minutes you’ve spent talking to him, you see hints of smiles hidden under a professional, powerful exterior.
“Call me sometime. You know, so I can pay you back for that drink.” You stand up from the bar, legs weak from the heavy drinking you’ve done, “Or if you just want some company.” He nods slightly in response and you turn to leave. You can’t help but turn for a second to watch as Aaron walks back to his table of what appear to be friends. One of the women looks back at you and smiles the most infectious, sweetest smile at you. You return it and move to leave the bar.
It wasn’t until late that night that you got a call. The drinking your sorrows away didn’t stop once you left that bar. You were curled up on your couch, a glass of wine clutched in your hands.
“Hello?” you mumble into the phone, pulling the blanket around your shoulders tighter.
“We didn’t really get to talk much at the bar, but I’m pretty sure you made some promises about paying me back for that drink,” A stern man’s voice cuts through the phone.
“Aaron?” you ask momentarily confused, “It—It’s late, are you drunk?”
Your laugh rings through the phone and it’s that laugh that has Aaron so intensely drawn to you. He can’t help himself. He needs to be near you, “Just go to the door.”
You stand up, “My door? How did you get my—oh right. FBI agent,” you muse and open your door. And there he is, standing at the door with the phone pressed to his ear. He pulls it away and hangs up. “This is incredibly creepy, I hope you know that.” You lean against the doorframe, pulling your large sweater around yourself tighter. His eyes run over you. You grin slightly, catching his wandering gaze, and at that, he shoves his hands in his pockets.
“So about that drink you owe me.” Aaron takes a few hesitant steps into your apartment. He closes the door behind him, “How about you pay me back wit—” he starts to talk but you don’t let him finish his sentence. You grip his shirt and pull him close, your lips melting against his.
It’s messy and passionate and needy. You struggle to stumble along, guiding him towards your bedroom and his hands are touching every inch of you. He hurriedly pulls your sweater off and tosses it off to the side before unzipping your dress. You let it fall to the floor and kick it off as you match his frantic pace, pulling off his shirt and pushing down his jeans. He lays you down gently and reaches around to unclasp your bra.
“Holy fuck,” Aaron groans as he takes a second to take in your naked body.
Then he’s leaving a trail of soft kisses down the expanse of your chest and breasts. He travels down further. His lips brush against your inner thighs, his stubble tickling your skin. He smirks up at you wickedly as he grips your thong in his teeth, pulling it down your legs. You already know your soaking wet pussy will give away just how bad you want him right now.
He doesn’t hesitate, he goes to work on you. Licking and stroking and rubbing your clit. Your back arches and you grip the sheets and his hair. You massage your breasts, panting heavily as two of his fingers press into you, his tongue flicking your overly sensitive bud of nerves. “Oh god, Aaron yes!”
His name rolls off your tongue and you continue to chant it like a fucking mantra as his somehow rough yet gentle touch drives you wild. You feel the knots building in your stomach. Your legs tremble with pleasure as your eyes shut harshly. “Fuck, fuck, fuck!” You’re panting intensely at this point and the whole room practically slips away as your orgasm hits and your body feels out of control. Every nerve ending on fire. And Aaron is merciless, he continues to lick and tease as you ride out your high.
He can’t help but grin proudly at the number he’s done on you. As he comes up to plant a few more kisses on your lips, you feel his rock hard erection pressing against your thigh. You kiss him hungrily while fumbling to stroke him through his boxers.
The groan the emerges from his lips is… holy fucking shit it’s sexy. You flip the two of you over so you’re on top of him, your chest pressed against his. You dip your hand into his boxers, pumping the entirety of his length. You feel him getting harder and his cock twitches in conjunction with a loud, throaty groan. “Y/N." His eyes flutter open and he grabs your arm to still your motions. “I need you, now.”
Within seconds he’s peeling his boxers off, you roll the condom down onto him and you slam your hips down on his. You can’t contain the loud gasps and moans as you feel your walls stretch around him. Fuck it’s been too long since you’ve had sex. You’re still for a second and Aaron bucks his hips, needing friction, needing to thrust and feel your tightness around him.
“Oh god." Your eyes are practically rolling back in your head as Aaron takes an agonizing pace, lifting your hips all the way up just to slam them all the way back down again.
He has a vice grip on your hips and you can feel the bruises forming under his fingertips. You grind your hips against his as you ride him faster. “Fuck you feel amazing,” Hotch lets out another one of those agonizingly sexy groans.
“I’m close,” you whine out. Aaron reaches to rub your clit with his thumb as he starts thrusting his hips up to meet yours chaotically. That combined with his large cock hitting your sweet spot sends you tumbling over the edge once again. It’s not long after that you feel his cock throbbing deep inside you, his hips messily thrusting and his face contorted up in pleasure. His panting becomes rapid and it's not long before he’s coming undone inside you. You flip off of him to collapse at his side on the bed.
“So when are we doing this again?” you pant heavily and hear a beautiful sound beside you. The sound of Aaron laughing.
Sometimes you worry if he’s embarrassed by you. I mean, you’re a few years shy of 20 years younger than him. You’re still in school. He was starting college by the time you were out of diapers. He runs a whole goddamn unit of the FBI and you’re still a student. You both are in entirely separate places in life, how do you reconcile that? It’s not as if he keeps you secret. Jessica knows you and you met his son Jack one time. Besides, you’re not really showing him off either. Not that you have many people to show him off to.
Like said, it’s been weeks since you’ve seen him which has just left you to sit around and overthink just about everything.
Aaron is working a case in DC. You saw the news reports the other day. Women were turning up dead in alleyways behind popular nightclubs and bars in the downtown area. Despite this horrifying news, you were happy when he told you the case was at home. It meant less travel. Less travel means Aaron is less tired. Which means more sex for you. And god, did you need sex.
It’s your friend’s 27th birthday and in an attempt to keep her from crying about getting a year older, you and a group of friends promised to go out drinking with her. You reach for your phone to check for any messages from Aaron. You would drop all your plans if he told you he was coming over tonight. There is one new message but it’s not exactly the text you were hoping for.
From: Aaron:
Please be safe for the next few days. Don’t go anywhere alone. Call me if there’s any trouble or if you need anything at all.”
You furrow your brows. It’s not news that Aaron cares about you and wants to look out for you but usually while on a case it’s radio silence from him. Yes, if you were really in danger he would want you to call immediately, but usually, he tells you he needs to focus on the job and nothing else. You dismiss the text, chalking it up to the presence of a serial killer in the city you both live in. Hell, you were pretty freaked out too. You had seen the girls on the news, 20-30, with your hair color and around your height.
You let out a long sigh, knowing you are most definitely not getting laid tonight. It’s time to get stupid drunk with your friends and enjoy your night anyway.
It does not take long for you and all your friends to reach the perfect level of sloppy drunk. Seeing as you all haven’t been out in months, what with some of you pursuing real jobs, grad school, med school, and whatnot, there hasn’t been a lot of time for screwing around as you did in college.
“So come on! You cannot still be single,” your close friend Sarah screams in your face over the music.
“It’s complicated,” you feel your words starting to string together. They’re not quite slurred but it’s getting there, “He just comes over, fucks my brains out, we spend some time together, and then it’s over.”
Your comments provoke a loud response of laughs and cheers from your friends, “So we don’t even get a name? Or a job? Or where you met him?”
“He guest lectured a course on abnormal and criminal psychology a few months ago,” You start to explain but Sarah is cutting you off before the words have left your mouth.
“Months? This has been going on for months?” You roll your eyes. The bartender places another full tray of shots in front of you guys. She nods towards a man at the edge of the bar. As you look up, he gives you a small wave and smiles. Creepy.
“No, I ran into him a few weeks after and I just gave him my number.” You down the shot, souring your face up before reaching for a lime wedge to chase it, “And then things just happened.”
“Name? Job? Age?” Another friend rattles off at you.
“Isn’t this Sarah’s birthday? Shouldn’t we be talking about her?” You try and steer the conversation away from yourself. You turn back to the bar and see that same man who sent you the shots staring at you. Even when you turn away you can feel his eyes boring into the back of your head.
“Well I want to know, so this is a birthday present,” she continues to pry and it drives you crazy. You're just not ready to share what you and Aaron have with the world.
“His name is Aaron and he works in the FBI and he’s 45,” You mumble that last part into your glass as you take a long sip.
“He’s how old?” Your friend’s jaw drops and another friend grins widely. Your face is burning hot at embarrassment and all the attention.
“Can we all just shut up and drink?” you command forcefully before downing your own.
Hotch looks down at his phone, waiting for any sign that Y/N has seen his text. He doesn’t panic though. She has a life, she’s busy. She probably has plans for the evening. Maybe she’s out… with someone. Aaron shakes his head slightly before forcing his attention to the case. But his mind wanders. Would she go out with someone? It’s not like anything between them is defined. I mean, he would never go out with anyone else. He just wants her. If she wants to go out on a date she can do whatever she wants. Yet, Hotch can’t help but feel the jealousy coursing through his body. The idea of someone else touching her… yeah, that makes him angry.
His more rational thinking takes over. Maybe she’s busy with school work. He knows how hard she’s been working on her research. He fails to hide a smile as he thinks about the way her face lights up when talking about her research. The passion she has for her work is extremely adorable...
You hear three short raps at the door, “It’s open!” you call out as you rush to get all your thoughts down on your computer. You hear the door open and the footsteps approaching.
“You leave your door unlocked? Do you realize how incredibly unsafe and unwise that is?” You can hear that Aaron probably has his stern face on, judging by the disapproval in his voice.
“I knew you were coming,” You shrug and gnaw at your bottom lip furiously as you work, “I just need one moment. I was thinking that in a controlled quantum environment...” As you start to ramble Aaron’s hands snake around your waist. He pushes your hair to the side, placing feather-light kisses along your neck.
“Mm,” He mumbles against you.
“Wait, wait,” you moan, “If you keep doing that I’m going to lose my train of thought and I will never forgive you unless you can formulate how to create thermal distrib—” He nips at your skin and gives your hips a squeeze. Your groans grow louder.
“The physics can wait,” Aaron growls against your skin, turning you around so he can passionately kiss you, “I need you now.”
The panic doesn’t ease because Aaron reaches to call you once again. You don’t pick up because well… you’re a little preoccupied drowning your liver. He thinks, if you had just given a small ok text, he would know you’re safe. But he’s panicking. He continues to panic for the next hour until something unexpected soothes that anxiety. The sound of your screaming drunken voice radiating throughout the entirety of the precinct the team is working in. But as soon as the wave of anxiety dissipates, he feels his stomach drop.
“I’m a victim here!” you screech and cement your legs in place so that the officers holding your arms are practically dragging you.
“Ma’am please!” You kick your legs violently as the officers try to seat you in a chair. They undo your handcuffs and redo them so that your hand is cuffed to the desk. “We’re understaffed and backed up so you sit here and shut up while we get you booked.”
“He was feeling me up! Under the skirt over the panties. He grabbed my ass, I’m sure I have a mark you wanna see it? He assaulted me!” you continue to screech and reach for the hem of your dress, ready to flash every cop in the precinct your ass.
“So you smashed a bottle over his head? Real ladylike,” one of the officers steps forward and holds your hand tight to keep you from lifting the dress.
“Don’t I get a phone call.” Now your words are slurred together. That last round of shots before you got arrested is hitting you hard.
“Once we book you.”
“I know a federal agent. From the FBI,” you spell out the letters obnoxiously, “Do you even know what that is?”
“Yes, I’m sure the federal government will come running to post your bail. Stay here. Don’t move,” the officer commands and you hold up your handcuffed wrist to demonstrate that you’re quite frankly incapable of going anywhere.
“Oh my god,” Prentiss lets out a small laugh from the conference room. “I can hear her through the closed doors.”
“Well, most of this room is glass and sound travels through the glass just about the same as it does air. A better insulating material would be a foam or fiberglass or even a mineral wood composite,” Reid clarifies before giving that signature tight-lipped smile.
“She is… really something,” Morgan laughs and nudges Hotch, “Hotch look.”
Hotch turns and sees what he’s dreading. He sees you, drunk out of your mind. Your skimpy dress is somehow simultaneously riding low on top and riding up on the bottom. You have a small cut lip and a little bit of blood on your dress. His brows furrow deeply. “Oh god,” he mutters under his breath.
“These cops are supposed to stay in the bars and clubs for protection. Why are they wasting time on drunk girls?” Rossi finally chimes in.
The cops finally get you settled into a chair and you kick your feet like a child. “Call the FBI! I know them.”
“Oh does she now. You guys know her?” JJ rolls her eyes and laughs, “I am so glad I never got arrested when I was in college. My parents would’ve killed me.”
“College? Girls do not look like that in college,” Morgan smirks.
“We have to focus on the case,” Hotch's jaw tightens as he sees Morgan look over your body. It’s not something new for Morgan but when he’s making those eyes at you specifically, Hotch feels that surge of jealousy again.
“Call them! Call Agent Aaron Hotchner.” You lean back and try to cross your arms, but your right hand is yanked back by the cuffs.
The team all turns to Hotch with wide eyes. “You know her?” Rossi smirks.
“Where exactly do you know her from?” Emily fights the grin growing on her lips as she looks over her stone-faced boss.
“I’m sorry what?” The cop glances down at you.
“Aaron Hotchner with the Behavioral Unit Analysis Science thing or something like that he’s in the FBI he’s unit chief. I know him.” You roll your eyes at the cop who is speechless, “Oh god. Are you that thick? A-A-R-O-N H-O-T-C-H…” you trail off the alcohol inhibiting your spelling capabilities, “N-E-R. Aaron Hotchner! Call him and he’ll tell you to let me go.”.
The cop glances at some of his coworkers before looking at the conference room. You follow his gaze and see Aaron with a large group of other well-dressed agents. “Oh fuck,” you mutter. Aaron opens the glass doors and steps out of them walking towards you.
“So how does he know this girl?” Prentiss tries her best to hide her spying on you and Aaron.
“I got money on babysitter,” Morgan nods.
“No way, she’d be with Jack right now. I’d say she met him at work." JJ leans against the desk, watching Hotch as he looks down at you, crossing his arms.
“Then we’d all have seen her before. Plus she wouldn’t be telling them she knows the FBI. She would technically be part of the FBI. Why not use that?” Rossi rubs a hand over his goatee.
“He’s sleeping with her,” Reid states simply before turning back to his geographical profile on the board.
“What?” Multiple members of the team turn in shock, not only at the statement but at the fact that Reid is the one making it.
“No way. She’s… at most 27 years old.” Morgan shakes his head, “She is not Hotch’s type.”
“Are you jealous that Hotch has more game than you?” Reid teases without turning away from his work.
“When was your last date, pretty boy? Huh?” Morgan hits him on the back of the head playfully.
“Officer.” Aaron steps in between you and the officer. Good thing, because two more minutes with that guy and you would be charged with a lot more than resisting arrest and public disturbance.
“Aaron!” you squeak, “I didn’t know you were here!”
“Well, she’s definitely not a coworker. She called him Aaron.” Rossi nods at the rest of the team still in the conference room. For a team of profilers, their attempts to hide the spying are weak at best.
“I’ll take care of her.” He doesn’t bother looking at you, but he gives the officer his best unit-chief glare.
“Sir we have a process to go through here. We’re still processing her arrest,” the officer attempts to argue with Hotch but you can see the discomfort clearly in the officer. He struggles to meet Hotch’s eyes.
“Please officer, we have much more to deal with here. I want to find this guy before another body drops. We need you out there patrolling the bars for the guys, not the drunk girls the creeps hit on.” Aaron takes on a stern voice.
“Yes agent.” The cop is visibly annoyed but isn’t willing to get into a fight with a federal agent all over your stupid drunk ass.
“Are you injured? You’re bleeding.” He grabs your chin in his calloused fingers, turning your face from side to side to assess the small cuts. You almost moan into his touch but remember the current location.
“No, no it’s someone else’s.” You turn out of his grip, trying to push his hands off.
“Someone else’s? What did you do?” Fuck. Aaron is furious with you. His arms are crossed against his chest and you can see the veins in his neck standing out. The tone he takes with you is harsh and you’re not used to him speaking with you like that… at least not used to it outside the bedroom.
“It’s not my fault okay!”
Aaron holds the bridge of his nose frustratedly, “Y/N. I have a serial killer to profile, catch, and stop from murdering innocent women. Can I just get the truth?”
“This creepy guy kept sending me and my friends drinks all night so when I went to the bar to get us another round he came over. Things got messy.” You shrug your shoulders. “Can you take off these cuffs now?” You hold out your wrists, pouting out your bottom lip. You can physically see him soften at that.
As Aaron reaches for the key and undoes the cuffs, he shakes his head at the stench of alcohol seeping out of you, “You’re gonna have to do better than things got messy.”
“I just…” You pause, knowing the details of the story are going to make him upset but he wants the truth, “I knew he was a little off. Weird and creepy and pushy, you know?” You rub your irritated wrists, “So he starts talking to me, offering me some drink. I know better than to accept a drink from a stranger so I turned him down. That's when he grabbed my arm and well… tried to cop a feel.”
“Cop a feel?” Aaron’s jaw has tightened and his hands are clenched so tightly at his sides his knuckles are pale.
“He slid his hands under my dress.” Your hand ghosts over the sore spot on your bottom where the man dug his fingers into your flesh, “He grabbed my legs and then my ass and then… and then he tried to get his hands in my underwear.” You show Aaron the red marks on your inner thigh. You’re not sure what you expect from him, but his face remains hardened. The only emotion readable on him is anger.
“The blood is from self-defense,” Aaron begins to understand.
You nod, confirming his statement, “I grabbed the first thing I could and smashed him on the head. I think I sliced his eyebrow. By the time the cops came, he was gone and I was in cuffs.”
Aaron looks back at his team in the conference room. In a poor attempt to hide their spying, they all rapidly turn their eyes to their work. He takes a few steps closer to you, his eyes looking over the red bruising on your cheek. He fights every urge to reach out and touch you, stroke your face softly and kiss your lips, “Did he hurt you? We should get a medic to check you out or–”
He doesn’t have a second to finish that thought. “Hotch, another body just dropped,” Morgan and Prentiss come rushing out of the conference room, “We’re going to the crime scene now.”
Aaron nods at his team members, “Call me if anything stands out.” The team nods and Aaron reaches for your arm, walking you towards the rest of the team, “I don’t want you alone right now. You’re going to sit here and keep quiet, understand?”
You bite your lip and look around at the team, still pretending as if they’re not listening in, “Jeez way to embarrass me, Aaron,” you mumble under your breath as you drop down into a chair with a loud sigh like a child.
JJ can’t help but come over to talk to you, “I’m Jennifer." You give her your name, "It's so nice to meet you Y/N, how do you and Hotch know each other?”
“Hotch?” you let out before quickly realizing the nickname for Aaron. You shake her hand, “Oh Agent Hotchner and I are just fuc–“
“Friends,” Aaron cuts in, “Y/N and I are friends. We have a case to get back to,” Aaron frantically changes the topic of conversation but your little comment doesn’t go unnoticed by the team members. Even Reid is smiling slightly at your comment.
You sit back in your chair and take in the sight of Agent Hotchner, Unit Chief of the BAU. The confident and commanding energy he exudes is immensely attractive. It’s not long before the agents that left for the crime scene, Morgan and Prentiss return with news for Aaron.
“Sir we found something weird at the crime scene,” Morgan steps back into the room.
“Weird?” Hotch cocks his head slightly to the side.
“There were droplets of blood over the victim’s dress but it wasn’t her own,” Morgan shakes his head.
“But you called and said she had no defensive wounds, he drugged her like the others. How could he have been injured?” Hotch turns back to the other case files.
“We’re not sure,” Emily shakes her head, “It’s possible it’s unrelated but maybe he might have been hospitalized for something recently?”
“What about any witnesses?” Hotch nods, “Any people at Churchkey bar see anything unusual? A man that was a little too forceful with women?”
You snort slightly at that, “I wouldn’t say that’s unusual for a bar.”
Hotch shoots you a hard glare that shuts you up for good, while Prentiss lets a smile shine through.
“The bar was mostly cleared out. Apparently the bar was packed earlier tonight but it cleared out after a bar fight broke out.” Morgan informs the team.
You bite your lip harshly. Aaron told you no talking but… this is more important, right? “Wait, Churchkey bar?” You finally speak up and all the agents turn their attention to you.
“What about it?”
“That’s the bar I was at tonight.” You trail off at the end of your sentence.
“You remember someone or something off?” Rossi looks over your body language.
“I think I talked to the unsub. I think... I’m the one who injured him." You unconsciously wrap your arms tightly around your body.
“You think you could walk me through the night? Tell me about him, it could really help us,” Morgan moves to sit on the edge of the desk to face you. "We could do a cognitive interview." He nods at Hotch.
"A cognitive?" You look between the two men.
"It's a memory recall exercise. We would walk you through the night and you tell us as much as you can," Morgan explains gently.
"And it could help you find him?" You ask, unsure how much you remember about him.
"You might not realize the type of details that help us form the profile." Morgan places a reassuring hand on your shoulder.
Aaron clears his throat. “She’s not sober enough for a cognitive." You can tell that the fact that his personal life is bleeding into his work is driving him crazy.
“If I can help catch this creep, I want to help. I’m fine.” You touch your finger to your nose a few times in an attempt to demonstrate your sobriety.
“Then you should drink some coffee before we start,” Aaron dismissively addresses you before turning to leave, “And I’m going to want the whole truth.” He stalks off towards the interrogation room.
Rossi runs to catch up with Aaron, pulling him off to the side. “Aaron, you cannot conduct this cognitive.”
“Excuse me?” Aaron snaps, crossing his arms against his chest.
“Take a step back, pretend she’s not someone you clearly care about,” Aaron rolls his eyes at Rossi’s comment but plays along as he continues.
“She’s a young girl… just how young is she?” Rossi raises a brow at Aaron, losing his train of thought.
“Dave.” He lets out an exasperated sigh.
Rossi holds his hands up in defense, “Fine, okay. She’s a young girl, she’s a little drunk, and she’s been sexually harassed in a bar by our unsub. Who do you send in to talk to her?”
“The least intimidating figures to her,” Aaron nods.
“So definitely not the angry boyfriend who wants to kill anyone who touches her,” Rossi clarifies.
“I’ll send in JJ and Prentiss,” Hotch sighs and turns before pausing, “And I’m not her boyfriend.”
Rossi simply smiles and pats Aaron’s back, “Ok boss.”
You sit up in your chair tiredly as Emily and JJ walk into the interrogation room.
“Hi Y/N, I’m Agent Prentiss and you’ve already met Agent Jareau,” Emily sits across from you.
“He can hear us, right?” You bite your lip and look towards the glass.
“Who can hear us?” JJ takes a seat and places a file in front of you.
“Aaron.” You search the glass, knowing that you won’t be able to see him but that he definitely can see you.
“Oh uh-” Emily pauses, unsure what to say in response.
“Do you want more privacy? I can ask the agents to leave.” JJ starts to stand.
“Hearing this would help them figure who the killer is?” You’re gnawing your lip hard enough to draw blood, a nervous habit Aaron never hesitates to point out to you.
“Yes,” JJ sits back down.
“Then it’s fine.” You look over one last time, “Just make sure Aar— Agent Hotchner,” you correct yourself, “Make sure Agent Hotchner doesn’t lose his shit.”
“No promises,” Prentiss smirks and lets out a small breath, “We’re going to walk you through the night. If it gets to be too much you let us know and we’ll take a break, okay?”
Well, now you’re really nervous. You let out a small breath, “Okay.” You close your eyes as Agent Prentiss starts.
“You’re in the bar. It’s crowded…”
“Y/N I think he really likes you,” your friend Sarah laughs. “Come on go talk to him.”
“No, I really shouldn’t.” You feel dizzy and light on your feet from the alcohol the man has been plying you and your friends with.
“Why?” Another friend chimes in, “Big strong Agent Hotchner going to punish you for talking to another guy?” Your friends taunt you playfully.
You smile widely at them, “Yes, yes he will.”
“You naughty, naughty girl!” Sarah laughs. You feel eyes on you and look back to the man at the bar. He’s hunched over in his stool. He looks nervous, but he smiles sheepishly at you and waves. It’s not long before he’s calling the bartender over again and pointing at you animatedly.
“Next round is on me,” you say softly to your friends, keeping your eyes on the man’s face, memorizing every detail you can. His face is young but worn and tired. The wrinkles on his forehead tell you he frowns a lot. They’re lines that appear on Aaron’s face too. You think about how you tease Aaron about smiling more. God, you miss Aaron right now. You wish he was here to make you feel safe. As you walk up to the bar, your presence causes the man to stand up and move closer.
“I was going to order you and your friends more drinks. I ordered you a vodka soda. It’s what you’ve been drinking all night, right?” He stutters slightly as he talks to you. He slides a glass over to you, but you know better. Strange man... drink that you didn’t see the bartender actually make... no way.
“I was actually going to order a beer,” you try to reject the glass, “You take the vodka soda though. You’ll see why they’ve been my go-to all night. He’s been making them very strong.” You look at the bartender, ordering a beer. You pray that the young bartender senses your discomfort.
“Come on it’s a harmless drink.” The strange man moves into you, pushing the glass closer. “You have the drink, we’ll get to know each other better… you’ll like it. I can make you like it.”
Thinking about his words sends chills down your spine. You have to take a moment to let out a shaky breath.
“Are you sure you want to continue listening to this?” Rossi eyes Hotch. Hotch’s face is contorted so harshly into a mixture of anger, disgust, and sadness. His neck muscles tense, his arms are tightly crossed against his body. He doesn’t even acknowledge Rossi.
“Can you keep going?” JJ eyes your face. You nod.
“No thank you, and no more drinks for my friends and I. We can get our own drinks.” You turn to grab your beer but soon the man stops you. He grabs your wrist tightly, placing his other hand behind your back. He pulls you flush against him. His rough, calloused fingertips grab and scratch up your thighs, under the dress. He grabs your ass so hard you want to scream out. He continues to trail his fingers up, hooking around your panties and—
A sickening shattering noise and cracking erupt as you swing the beer bottle at his head. The man screams. “You bitch!” He slaps your face. You stumble back, falling on the floor, cutting your hands on the broken glass from the bottle. Your skin is sticky with alcohol and you glance down at the blood on your dress. The bar grows louder. The commotion intensifies. You feel a friend’s hands wrap around your arms pulling you up off the ground.
“Wait he—!” You look around for the man but he’s nowhere to be found.
“Not long after that I was being shoved into a cop car and escorted here.” You finally open your eyes and look at the two agents.
“I can make you like it?” Emily asks you to clarify. She speaks slowly clearly enunciating her words but you can hear the disgusted tone in her voice.
“That’s exactly what he said.” You wrap your arms around yourself, “Does that all help?”
“Yes, yes it does,” JJ reaches out to touch your hand gently. Your eyes flick back to the one-way glass. You can’t see Aaron but you can tell he’s probably fuming. He probably has that signature scowl on his face.
“Am I—” You clear your throat and try to adjust your dress for more modesty, “Can I go?” Prentiss gives you a sad, pity-filled smile and nods. You stand up quickly and exit the room in a rush, colliding with Aaron’s strong chest as you do. You look up into his eyes and you see something in his face you’ve never seen in all the times you've been with him: sadness. You bury your face into his chest and his arms wrap tightly around you. “I was scared,” You choke out as his large, warm hands rub circles into your back, “I needed you.” You ball up his shirt in your fists. You’re not one to cry easily, but your body shakes as you breathe heavily.
“I know,” his voice cracks as he rests his chin on top of your head. He runs one hand over your hair softly, shushing you gently, “I’m not going to let anything happen to you.”
You pull away from his chest and frantically pull his lips down to yours. A strong hand goes to your back, holding you close to him. You hear the interrogation room door open behind you, the two agents stepping out, but neither you nor Aaron break the kiss. “I don’t know what I’d do if something happened to you,” Aaron breathes against your lips, pulling you back into a tight hug. “You’re safe here with me now.”
———
You lift the heavy metal knocker and let it slam down twice, waiting for the door to open. When it does, Rossi envelops you in his arms, a wide smile spreading across his lips. He grabs your face tightly, kissing each cheek joyfully. “Bellissimo! I’m so glad you could make it.” Rossi places a gentle hand on your back and leads you inside.
You walk into the crowded kitchen and the members of the BAU all turn and smile back at you. Aaron moves towards you and quickly gives you a soft kiss on your lips. “I’m so happy you’re here." 
“I’m so glad you’re finally home.” You pull away from Aaron to make the rounds hugging the people who are like family to you at this point.
Morgan wraps a friendly arm around your shoulder and can’t help but tease Aaron, “Hotch, you couldn’t be bothered to pick up your girl?” He turns to smile at you while Aaron shakes his head.
“I had to stop by the research lab so I just had my classmate Tyler drop me off after we finished up." You shrug.
“Tyler, huh?” Rossi grins, hoping to rile up Aaron a little.
“Is he cute?” JJ chimes in with a laugh.
Aaron quickly clears his throat, hoping to change topics. He raises his brows at you, “So do you want to share the news or should I do it for you?”
“Oh my god, you’re totally preggers!” Garcia squeals and runs to hug you again. You glance at Aaron and can only laugh.
“No, no.” You smile as she pulls away and you look at the shocked faces of everyone in the kitchen, even Aaron looks a little rattled. You playfully nudge his arm, “See what you did? Always causing trouble.”
“Me? If I recall correctly you’re the one who got arrested for being drunk off your ass and trying to fight a serial killer.” His comment elicits a series of small laughs from everyone.
"Yeah and it helped you catch him, so really you all should thank me for being drunk." You playfully argue with Aaron. "Anyway, the actual news. No, I'm not pregnant." You point at Penelope as she opens her mouth to say something else. 
“You’re looking at the proud new owner of a Ph.D. in physics!” You do a small cheesy spin as the rest of the team congratulates you, “Handed in my final thesis paper today.” Aaron smiles proudly as you move back to his side.
“Yeah that’s great and all but you’re still two Ph.D.s behind me.” Spencer can’t help but tease you. In the past year, he’s become one of your closest friends, especially since Aaron can’t even seem to begin to understand your thesis research.
“All right cool it kid.” You joke with him.
“Kid? I’m older than you.” Spencer laughs. Aaron comes closer to wrap his arm around your waist. The gesture is comforting and just this touch sends waves of pleasure through your body.
“Reid might have two more Ph.D.s than you but he’s got nothing on your good looks.” Prentiss winks at you.
“She’s got that right,” Aaron smirks as he kisses your cheek gently.
“Ok, ok, enough small talk.” You feel your face flush, “I came here to learn some cooking from chef Rossi, not talk about how hot I am.” You see Aaron roll his eyes with a smile and you pull him close as Rossi starts the demonstration.
“I love you so much, you know that?” Aaron has his arms wrapped around you from behind. He speaks softly so only you can hear.
“I know,” You smile, happiness flooding through your body, “I love you too.”
267 notes · View notes
wilbur-rabbit · 3 years
Text
We are Soulmates - Sam, Dean and Cas' POV
Criminal Minds / Supernatural Crossover
Summary: When you get arrested by the FBI Sam, Dean and Cas do everything they can to get you back.
Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x Reader (Aaron isn't in this chapter)
Word Count: 2294
Chapter 1
Warnings: cursing
A/N: This is a short story based on 'We are Soulmates' that goes through what happened in the first chapter from Sam, Dean and Cas' point of view. I recommend reading chapter one first. I hope you guys enjoy it!
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Sam and Dean had stayed behind when Y/N had decided to follow Krissy and her friends to kill the vampire. Neither of them was particularly fond of the idea of you going off on your own but you insisted that you had it. Even after all these years they still felt protective over you.
Several hours later, Sam and Dean had gotten nowhere with the foster dad. They felt in their guts that something was off about him, but they didn’t know what. Both ready to call it a night, Dean got out his cell phone prepared to call Y/N to see how things were going with Krissy, when suddenly Krissy and her friends’, Josephine and Aiden, barge through the front door. The three of them talking at once, making it impossible to decipher what they were saying.
“Okay!” Dean yelled out. “One at a time, Krissy what is going on?”
Krissy took two heavy breaths before launching into the events that occurred after they found the vampire. How Y/N had found them in the barn right after Krissy had killed the vamp that had murdered her father, to them hearing several cars pulling up and Y/N telling them to go and get the Winchester’s. When Sam and Dean heard that Krissy had seen agents with FBI vests on when they had run out of the barn, dread settled into their chests.
Right after Krissy finished her story and Sam and Dean had gotten all that they could out of them, they left heading back to their motel room to try and come up with a plan.
The impala was quiet, both brothers thinking of ways to fix the mess they have found themselves in. Dean was the first to break the silence.
“How did this even happen?” he asked his hands gripping the steering wheel tighter. “It’s our job to protect her. We shouldn’t have let her go off on her own.”
Sam glanced over at his brother. As soon as they had heard what happened to Y/N, he knew Dean would blame himself. It didn’t matter how many times you had gone off on your own on a hunt and been fine. They couldn’t have known this one would be different.
“She’s going to be okay,” Sam reassured. “She’s been in worse situations before. She can handle this.”
Dean slammed his hand down on the steering wheel, “She’s never been arrested by the fucking FBI! They found her standing over a decapitated corpse. They aren’t going to just let her go.”
They had just pulled into the parking lot of their motel and Sam waited until they parked before he responded, wanting to give Dean a moment to calm down.
“I understand that she hasn’t dealt with this before,” Sam said in the reassuring voice he always used with people when he wanted them to stay calm. Dean looked over and glared at him picking up on his tone, which caused Sam to sigh. “Okay, look, I know this is a fucked-up situation Dean, but we will get her out of it,” Sam said. “We need to call Cas and let him know what he is going on. We could use his help. Then I think we should head back to the bunker.”
“You want to leave her here?” Dean said incredulously.
Sam rolled his eyes, “I have an idea that might work, but we are going to need Cas and ingredients that we have in the bunker to do it.”
Dean sighed while pinching the bridge of his nose, “Fine. I’ll call Cas. You grab our stuff so we can check out and leave.”
As Sam was packing up the car Dean stood a few paces away waiting for Cas to pick up the phone. They hadn’t talked in a while and Dean felt bad that he was only contacting him because something was wrong. Communication was something he need to work on.
“Hello, Dean,” came Cas’ deep voice through the phone.
“Hey, Cas,” Dean replied. “How have you been?” Dean didn’t want to automatically start off with the bad news, plus he genuinely wanted to know how Cas was doing.
“I’ve been good. I just finished a hunt in Nebraska,” Cas said. “Vengeful spirit. I’m heading back to the bunker now. How are you, Dean?”
Dean wanted to ask how the hunt had gone and why Cas didn’t just come along with them if he planned on hunting, but he stopped himself. Their current predicament was more important.
“I’ve been better,” Dean said with a sigh. “Actually, that is why I called. Y/N was arrested by the FBI.” His hand that wasn’t holding the phone rested on his hip as he looked to the ground. “Sam has an idea on how to get her out, but he says we need to go back to the bunker and that we will need your help.”
Cas is silent for a moment surprised at the turn of events. “Of course. Whatever I can do to help,” he said.
“Thanks, Cas,” Dean replied happy to have Cas’ help, even though he had known Cas would be on board as soon as he knew Y/N was in trouble. “We are currently in Bloomington, Indiana, but we are getting ready to head that way.”
“Okay, good. I will see you at the bunker,” Cas said.
“Sounds good. We will call if we get an update,” Dean responded. “Bye, Cas.”
“Goodbye, Dean.”
As they started their drive back to the bunker Sam explained his plan.
“Archangel grace can be used to jump dimensions, right?” Sam asked even though he and Dean both knew that was true. Dean nodded anyway. “So, what I was thinking is that we, in theory, should be able to use Cas’ grace to open up a portal to where Y/N is. We can go through, grab Y/N and bring her back.”
“Do you even know if that will work?” Dean questioned, glancing at Sam.
“Well,” Sam started. “No, not exactly.”
“So, we have a half-assed plan that we don’t even know is going to work and is taking us farther away from where Y/N is currently locked up?” Dean asked in disbelief.
“I don’t see you coming up with anything,” Sam said, his voice rising.
“Yeah, cause you said you had a plan–,” Dean is interrupted by his phone ringing.
“Hello?” he barked not even looking at the caller ID.
“Dean,” you breathed on the other line and Dean was so relieved to hear your voice. “Where the hell are you?” he knew he shouldn’t let the panic into his voice so you would stay calm, but he couldn’t help it.
“Is that Y/N?” Sam asked. Dean nodded before taking the phone from his ear and putting it on speaker.
“I’m at the police precinct,” you said relieving both men. They hadn’t voiced it, but they had both been afraid they would move you to somewhere with higher security, especially if the feds found out that you were involved with them. They hoped for your sake it didn’t come to that.
“We know what happened and we are so sorry. We should have gone with you. We are going to find a way to get you out. We aren’t sure how, but we will. Oh, and Sam is here too.” Dean said having to get some of the guilt off his chest. Obviously, he knew that Sam had a plan but given the fact that they had no idea if it would even work, he didn’t want to give you false hope. Plus, if their call were being monitored it would be better if the feds didn’t hear what they were planning. Not that they would necessarily believe it.
“Hey Y/N/N. How are you holding up?” Sam asked.
“Hey Sammy. I’ve been better.” You chuckled, but there was no humor to your voice. “It’s bad. I don’t know if I’m going to get out of this one.”
Dean’s grip on the steering wheel tightened and Sam squeezed his eyes shut. They could both hear the fear in your voice, and they hated that they couldn’t do anything but reassure you that it would be okay.
“Hey, none of that. We’ve been in situations worse than this. We will find something. You just need to hang in there. Don’t admit to anything,” Sam said. Dean glanced over and saw the determination on his face. The look made him feel more confident that they would be able to get you home.
“Okay. Yeah, I won’t.” you responded, and they could hear the hope that Sam words had given you.
“I got a hold of Cas earlier,” Dean said. “He is heading this way too.”
“Good. I’m glad he will be back with us,” You said.
“It’s going to be okay. We will figure something out.” Dean repeated.
“I know. I trust you guys. It’s just…” You paused. Sam and Dean waited for you to continue, but when you didn’t, Dean reassured you again.
“We know. We’ve been there.” Dean said.
You were still quiet and the brothers glanced at each other, wondering what was happening on the other side of the call.
“Should I ask for a lawyer?” you questioned suddenly.
Dean turned to Sam, “Well, should she Sammy?”
Sam gave his brother a glare at the nickname, making Dean roll his eyes. Apparently, it was only okay if you called him that.
“It would probably be better if you did. We have had them in the past. That way they can’t try and pull a fake confession out of you,” Sam advised.
“Maybe I should just tell the truth,” You replied. Both of the brothers’ eyes widened, surprised that you would want to tell the FBI about the supernatural.
“That is always a tight rope to walk,” Dean cautioned.
“Yeah, you should really think about that before you do,” Sam added.
“You might be right,” you said, but you sounded slightly dazed and distracted. “I have to go. They are wanting me to get off the phone.”
“Okay. Just be careful. We’ll figure this out.” Dean said.
“I know you will. I–I love you guys.”
Hearing you say those words softened the two men that thought of you as a sister. That wasn’t a word the three of you, or even four counting Cas, used that often and at hearing you say it in a stressful time like this, like you weren’t sure when you would see them again, made the brothers realize that they need to say it more.
“We love you too, Y/N.” Sam said softly.
“Yeah, we do,” Dean confirmed.
With a quiet goodbye you hung up the phone.
Once Sam and Dean got back to the bunker, they saw Cas’ ’78 Lincoln Continental parked in the garage. Dean was relieved to see it no matter how much he hated the car. The boys grabbed their duffels and headed into the bunker. Cas was sitting in the library, several books laid out on the table as he searched through them.
“Hey, Cas,” Dean said, setting his bag down on the side of table not covered in books. Cas looked up at the two men.
“Hello, Dean. Sam.” Cas replied. “I’ve been searching, trying to find something that can help us, but I have not been particularly successful.”
Dean pulled out a chair that was across from Cas. “Well, that’s okay,” he said sitting down in the chair. “Sam has a plan.” Sarcasm dripped from his tone.
Sam rolled his eyes, pulling out the chair next to Dean’s. “My theory is that if we can use archangel grace to jump between dimensions, we can use angel grace to teleport to other places here on Earth.” Sam told Cas.
Cas squinted his eyes and tilled his head. “In theory that could work.” He said, causing Dean to grunt. “I have never tried it, though. Not long ago I wouldn’t have needed a teleporting spell to go anywhere in the world.”
Dean sighed; his head tilted back so he was facing the ceiling. “Okay,” he said, looking to Sam and Cas. “If we do this and it does work, I’m going.”
“No, you’re not.” Cas said. “Y/N is with the FBI, who you have been on the wanted by for years and still would be if they didn’t think you were dead. I’m going”
Dean sighed, knowing he was right as much as he hated it. “Fine. Let’s do this.”
The three of them went to work finding the ingredients to the original spell. A pile of bones, dried herbs, cuts of wood fungus, and a pinch of dark powder, were all found in the storage room of the bunker. They added in a lock of Y/N’s hair that Dean grabbed from your hairbrush, so they could direct the spell toward your location.
After having everything assembled it was time for the final ingredient. Cas took the knife that Dean held out to him. He brought the knife across is neck letting some of his grace flow out into the small glass bottle that Dean held up to him. After the glass was filled, Cas brought his hand to his throat, healing the wound with a glow of light from his palm.
Dean took the bottle and pored it over the bowl that held the other ingredients. As he poured the grace into the bowl Sam chanted in Enochian.
“Mah ray, fah doh, em lah. Kah day, em lah. Kah day, em lah!”
There was a flash of light, before the portal formed in the room. A crack glowing a dark gold. Cas looked to Sam and Dean for a moment before he walked through the portal, disappearing from the brothers’ view. Now all they could do is wait.
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iovjun · 3 years
Text
tsubaki (椿) - preview
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PAIRING: commander!jeno x rebel!reader (fem)
GENRE: fluff, angst, enemies to lovers(ish), royalty(ish) lmao idk
WARNINGS: mentions of murder, death, swords and knives, blood, violence
SYNOPSIS: all you’ve ever wanted was to avenge your parents, who died at the hands of the emperor. when you meet jeno, the man who commands armies, he offers to help your cause. but how can you trust the man who works for the very thing you plan to tear down?
WORD COUNT: teaser: 1.2k (estimated wc: ?? definitely more than 6k idk)
A/N: this is my very first long fic lmao not sure when it’ll come out, maybe in the next month or so. special thanks to @yoongistoesuwu for the original idea and some scenes that were also her ideas and for helping me out sometimes
[SEND A MESSAGE OR AN ASK TO BE ADDED TO THE TAGLIST]
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A silent warrior in the night.
You ran as fast as your feet could carry you, your steps making a muted thud against the soft ground. No other sounds could be heard but the chirp of the crickets and the breeze brushing past your ears. There was a howl in the distance, the sound of a wolf closing in on its prey.
You, like the other creatures of the night, were out for blood.
Each footfall ripped a ragged breath from you, your chest falling and rising rapidly. Ahead of you were the looming walls of the palace, too tall to see over. You approached the sturdy structure, cautiously observing your surroundings for any movement. Giving yourself a minute to catch your breath, you hid in the shadows beneath the wall, watching the starry sky above you.
The clouds moved and obscured the moon for a moment, pitching the world into murky darkness.
You moved quickly, taking hold of a jutting stone and scaling the wall in no time. As quiet as a mouse, you landed on the other side firmly, scurrying to find another shadow before the moon appeared again. It was risky to go through the palace courtyard, but the night was on your side this time.
As the clouds advanced once again so did you, scanning the vicinity for anyone that could be watching.
There was an approaching guard. When you saw him, your breath caught in your throat and you almost choked. You flattened yourself against the inner wall, scolding yourself for that one reckless moment that could’ve foiled your mission. As the figure got closer, you hand wandered down to rest on the dagger hanging from your hip. If he got any closer you would have no choice but to take him out.
Your grip tightened on the dagger, inhaling softly and watching the guard closely, getting ready to strike. Just as you were about to pull it from the scabbard, he turned on his heel sharply and headed the opposite direction.
Letting out a relieved breath, you continued your precarious trek along the stone wall. Your plan was perfect. Eliminating a guard was not part of it.
Just ahead was the gateway that would lead to the palace itself, and all you needed to do from then on is walk right in. It was comical how easy it was to break into such a heavily guarded place. The thought of it could make you laugh out loud.
Without making a single noise, you sprinted across the decorative stone floor and crossed the tall gateway, smirking to yourself at your skill. You finally pulled out your small weapon, holding it against your palm and crouching along the stone pillars. You momentarily stilled, your skin tingling the way it did when you trained.
Spinning on your heel, you turned and met an incoming blade with your dagger, the metal clanging and reverberating throughout the courtyard. Your eyes widen, and you quickly shove the long sword away from you, the blades making a shing! sound.
The man wielding the sword was not the one from earlier; he seemed of higher rank from his uniform robes, but you couldn’t tell clearly thanks to the lack of light.
It dawned on you that you had been discovered, and it was a problem.
In a split second, you pulled out your second knife, twin to the one you held in your right hand, and held it in your left. You lowered into your offensive stance, bending your knees and holding out your weapons in front of you.
You lunged first, aiming for a weak spot, but he moved just as fast and blocked your attack. Once again, your blades rang out and you could feel the power in his parry that made your daggers vibrate.
“Stop.”
His voice was hushed and calm as he lowered his sword. You took the opportunity to aim for his undefended chest, yet he anticipated the move and stepped aside. He grabbed your wrist and yanked you forcefully, the action catching you off guard. You tumbled down with him, hitting the stone ground hard.
“Hey!” you growled, attempting to untangle yourself from the mysterious man.
He put a hand over your mouth. “Shh...you’re going to get caught,” he muttered, pulling the both of you closer to the pillar, blending into the darkest shadows.
“Who goes there!” shouted an unfamiliar voice from behind the pillar.
You sucked in a breath and heard your unwelcome companion do the same, gripping your daggers tighter. Neither of you moved an inch, watching the other guards’s silhouette for his next move.
“I asked who’s there! Come out now before I call for more soldiers!” the voice rang out again. The hand over your mouth was removed and he used it to bring it to his lips, asking for silence. You watched him with wide eyes.
“I’m going to go out. Don’t move or make any noise, alright? I’ll take care of him,” he whispered, gripping your shoulders. “Just trust me, okay?”
Before you could even think of a response, he shot up with his sword in hand.
“Lieutenant Han!” he exclaimed. “It’s just me, don’t worry. Resume your rounds please.”
“Commander Lee? Right away sir,” the guard replied quickly as the man in front of you sheathed his sword like nothing.
Commander? You had been caught by the damn commander.
You got up quickly and stepped back but, as if reading your mind, the commander held out a hand to stop you.
“I know what you’re doing here, but you’ve got to have a better plan than just walking in and killing him,” he said, his voice low.
His words miffed you a bit. “So are you going to stop me?” you taunted, holding up your knives once more.
He sighed. “Put those down, you’ll attract the whole force if we fight. If you try now, you won’t make it. It was foolish of you to come alone.”
You lowered your weapons. “What are you saying then?” you asked him, raising your eyebrow.
“I’m saying go back home, and come back with a better plan.”
“Are all commanders this lenient? Aren’t you going to arrest me?” You scoffed.
The man shrugged, the action making him seem a bit more boyish. The shadows on his face made it impossible to discern his age, but from his voice he seemed young, too young to be a commander for the emperor.
“If you want me to, I have nothing against it. I thought it would be nice of me to give you a chance to spare your life,” he said bluntly. “Now go home, shoo shoo.”
“I am not a child. I’m here to kill the emperor,” you stated, getting defensive. “Now if you won’t stop me then move.” You tried maneuvering around him, but he blocked your path.
“I know, and I’m all for it. I told you though, it’s not time. Look at how easily I caught you, do you really think the other soldiers in there would be as forgiving as me? Go home princess.” He added the last part, putting a hand on your shoulder.
You shrugged him off. “I’m no princess. Don’t you want to murder him too? Is that why you’re letting me off the hook?”
The young man smiled dimly. “The lieutenant is coming back. I’ll see you later, princess,” he said, smirking as he emphasized the ridiculous name. “I’m Lee Jeno, by the way. Find me when you improve your master plan.”
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soulmate-game · 4 years
Note
Can you do a prompt of Marinette being the daughter of the Joker and Harley but Harley left him before Marinette was born and when Joker found out about his daughter He decided to kidnap Marinette so she can become like him (Ace chemicals) (Daminette)
Woot, my first ask in a while! Let’s see how I can do this oddly specific ask that reminds me of a fic that might actually exist but tbh I’ve read so many fanfics idk if my brain is remembering right
—*—*—*—*—*
Marinette knew Sabine and Tom weren’t her biological parents. She had known ever since she was eight, when her mother by blood visited her for the first time, sat her down, and explained everything. Including, but not limited to, her disastrously toxic past relationship, her new girlfriend, and her recent success with long term rehab (unofficial rehab that mostly consisted of illegal anti-hero actions, but hey if it worked it worked).
Marinette understood. Well no, she really didn’t since she was only eight, but she understood that her mom— that Harley— was genuine. She had always had a knack for emotions and telling when people were sincere or not. And Harley really was regretful about not being in her life beforehand, and was serious about wanting to be part of her life now that her own was mostly sorted out.
So Marinette was not surprised when Harley really did stick it out. When Harley cooed over Marinette copying her hairstyle to show her support of her biological mom, when Harley never failed to call at least once a week even if she was in jail for punching some asshole or another. Harley never stayed arrested long anymore, she was usually found to be on the right side of the moral scale more and more often so the police didn’t bother keeping her locked up anymore. Through the years, Marinette always looked forward to her mom’s calls. Looked forward to being lulled to sleep by one crazy story or another from her mother’s past. Everything was nice. Perfect, even, for a while.
A thump sounded from her balcony, one late night when Marinette was thirteen. Blinking, the dark haired girl furrowed her brows. Who would be on her balcony? Cautiously walking towards the trap door leading to it, grasping her metal pencil holder as a weapon (she remembered all of her Mom’s stories about break-ins and random attacks back in Gotham), the teen strained her ears. Akuma attacks were only a few months old now, but she had already become in high alert for any sign of Hawkmoth or his victims. As per usual, Marinette’s paranoia began to kick in. Did Hawkmoth already figure her out? Was he here for her earrings? Would she be able to fight him?
She gently pushed up the trap door, catching a glimpse of black leather. Huh? Marinette narrowed her eyes, confused. Was it Chat? He should have been on patrol, on the other side of the city. What was he doing visiting her?
Suddenly the trap door yanked the rest of the way open, making Marinette yelp as the handle for it rugged away from her fingers. And there, backlit by the pure blue-white moonlight, was Not Chat Noir. It was Catwoman, in all her skintight black leather glory, grinning at her before pushing her cat-eye goggles up to the top of her head and crouching down by the trap door’s entrance, balancing only on the pads of her feet.
“Well hello there~” the woman purred. “So you’re the cute little kitten Harley is so secretive about. Nice to finally meet you,” the woman held out a hand, sending Marinette a sweet, if mysterious, smile. For a while, the pigtailed girl only stared before a squeal of excitement left her throat, leaving very little room for any doubt as to her bloodline. A large smile curled over Marinette’s lips, leaving her beaming widely at the catlike woman on her balcony.
“Auntie Selina! Mom’s told me so much about you! Come in, come in, come in! I’ll sneak some macaroons up for you. Or do you prefer croissants? What’s your favorite flavor? Are you really dating Batman? Oh my goodness, that necklace is so lovely! Did you steal it?”
Selina could only chuckle fondly at the word vomit, letting the smaller girl drag her down the trap door and into her very… pink room. Looking around, Selina was once again slapped with just how similar this kid was to her outgoing friend. Marinette clearly had no shame in indulging in the things she liked, such as the color pink and anything regarding fashion. But there were other things amongst the girliness of the room, like the posters of Jagged Stone and the training dummy half-sticking out of her closet door. There were a few ornamental knives hung up behind her computer, seemingly just for decoration although Selina could see that they were definitely battle ready and sharpened. A small mallet, clearly a miniature replica of her mother’s own signature weapon, leaned up against the side of the girl’s laundry basket. But then there was Marinette’s mannequin, which was surrounded by meticulously cut pieces of cloth and had other pieces pinned to it strategically. Marinette clearly had the same professionalism and love for her chosen career that had so completely defined Harley in the Time Before Joker. The same genius intellect hiding in those deceptively cheerful bluebell eyes. And for the first time, though not for the last to be sure, Selina found herself thoroughly relieved that it seemed Marinette had inherited very little from her father.
Except, as she would learn from stories Harley told her later, an apparent affinity for chaos.
“I’m not that picky, kitten. But I’m not that hungry, so don’t go too out of your way,” Selina decided to just react the same way she did with Harley’s rambles, and answer one question at a time. “Also, I am actually dating Bruce Wayne. But, if you promise not to tell anyone—“ she waited for Marinette’s eager nod before continuing casually, “— the two are maybe not as mutually exclusive as many think,” Selina finished with a conspiratorial wink. “No, I actually did not steal this necklace. Bruce has been adamant in trying to curb me of my thieving habit by buying me almost everything I so much as glance at sideways. It’s sweet. Naive, because I like stealing for the fun of it, but sweet.”
Marinette giggled, bouncing in place happily. She loved a bit of innocent gossip like this. “Is Momma Ivy ever gonna visit? I don’t think Mom told her much about me yet, and I still gotta give her the shovel talk!” the fierce look that overcame Marinette’s face made Selina laugh again. Oh yes, definitely her mother’s daughter.
“Pam has been trying to sneak over, but the laws regarding Metahumans in Paris suddenly got much stricter a few months back and have caused some problems. You wouldn’t happen to know what happened, would you?” Selina did not miss when her seemingly innocent question caused her niece to close off almost instantly. Bluebell eyes took on a familiar guardedness, and scanned her with the same soul-searching intensity that Harley had when she was channeling her Psychiatrist side. Selina found herself in a slightly concerning spot though—
Because she couldn’t predict Marinette at all. She was left to simply stand there as Marinette searched for some unidentifiable thing in her eyes, completely unable to read the younger girl’s face and with no idea of what to expect. The side effect of having chaos so thoroughly entwined in both of her biological parents, she supposed.
“Nope, no idea.”
Selina knew that was a lie, but knew equally as well that she would not be getting a better answer anytime soon. So, she let it go and the two of them once again dipped into innocent chatter.
Later that night, when Selina left and the sun threatened to rise at any minute, Tikki flew up from her hiding spot under Marinette’s pillow to land on her holder’s shoulder. Marinette giggled and looked over at her little friend.
“Tikki?”
“Yes, Mari?”
“Why was I chosen to be your holder?” She asked suddenly, flopping back into her bed and staring at her ceiling. The little goddess hummed, smiling knowingly before flying down to cuddle in the crook of Marinette’s neck.
“Because you are born from luck itself. Even when bad things happen, you have the luck and determination to get out just fine, and stronger than before. And despite the destruction and anarchy in your blood, you have the willpower to reign it in and keep control of yourself. That’s all order really is, Marinette. The decision to take all the chaos and madness around us, and make it make sense. Make it do something good. And that’s a large part of who you are, I could feel it in your soul the moment we first met.”
Marinette closed her eyes, biting the inside of her cheek. “What if I lose control?”
“... You’ll just have to get it back. It’ll be hard, but as long as you have people to support you, you will be able to do it. You aren’t evil, Marinette,” the small God seemed to sense the true question her holder was asking, and did her best to soothe the doubt the girl felt. “Just remember the reasons you fight against chaos. Remember everyone you love, and you’ll be okay. And you have me, I’ll always help you.”
“... thank you, Tikki.”
—*—*—*—*—*
“He’s going to find out, Mom.”
“No he won’t, don’t be silly! I’ve been very careful about hiding you from him, Nettie-pie.”
“Mom… I just have a bad feeling. I don’t think we can hide who I am from him. If he sees me, I think he’ll know.”
The phone went silent.
“If he hurts you, I’ll kill him. If I was crazy about him, Sugar, then I’m head over heels for you. Not even he can stop me from caving his skull in if he tries his usual tricks with you.”
“... My plane leaves soon, I’ll talk to you when I land. And mom?”
“Yeah, honeycake?”
“I love you.”
—*—*—*—*—*
It was uncanny just how often Marinette’s hunches were right. Her intuition was something to behold, truly, because it only took three days in Gotham before Joker snatched her right out of her room at Harley and Ivy’s apartment. At least Marinette had sixteen by then, so she had had enough experience as a hero in Paris and with generally unpredictable situations and people who were absolutely nuts for her to not immediately panic. Too much, anyway.
Because there was definitely a little panic there.
See, Marinette knew herself inside out by then. After her own battle with her toxic feelings towards Adrien and doing her best to heal from those before she turned out like her mom, she knew she was by no means mentally indestructible. Mental illness ran the high risk of being inherited, and Marinette was well aware that her own personality was scarily similar to her mother’s at times. She got attached quickly, felt affection and love for others very strongly and, as she found with Adrien, could easily become obsessive if she didn’t watch herself. At least Harley was the perfect person to help with that, and Marinette was serious about helping herself too. She did everything she could to keep an eye on her mental health and keep her behavior in check so she didn’t do anything too unhealthy with her relationships again.
But she knew, she knew she had a soft spot for family. She got attached too easily. And being in the same room as her biological father, despite being tied up by her hands and feet and knowing just how many unforgivable things he had done in his life, Marinette felt vulnerable. She didn’t want to hurt him, despite everything. She still loved him, despite every reason not to, despite her first meeting with him being with him shoving chloroform over her face and hogtying her to a metal chain dangling over a vat of acid.
Geez, she’d need more than just her mom as a therapist after this for sure. Even if her mom had a PH.D, Marinette felt like she’d need several psychiatrists to sort through her emotional turmoil right then and make sense of any of it.
Marinette licked her lips, aware that the only kindness that Joker gave his daughter was sparing her from the discomfort of being gagged.
“Don’t,” Marinette said, surprising herself with the amount of steel she was able to put into her voice. Somehow, she managed to make the single word sound more like an order than a plead. “Joker, put me—“
“Ah-Ah-Ah!” The clown walked over, tutting and waving his finger in the air in almost playful admonishment. He gave her a dramatically fake pout. “Don’t you know it’s disrespectful to refer to your father by his first name?” Neither of them mentioned that Joker was definitely not his real name. They both knew the point was moot. “Say it with me now— ‘Daddy dearest, I am more than willing to be dunked in acid for you,’ go ahead, say it.”
Marinette’s jaw clenched. Familial love or not, she would not tolerate being ridiculed like that. She dealt with enough ridicule when she was fourteen and fifteen during school, before she put Liar Rossi in her place. She had spent the past three years as a hero in charge of the war against Hawkmoth, in charge of protecting all of Paris from an emotional terrorist.
And gee, wasn’t that what Joker was, too? Sure, he was a terrorist in the classic meaning of the word as well, but he was nothing if not a skilled manipulator. He knew the human mind just as well as Harley or any other psychiatrist did, he just used his knowledge for different means. He had emotionally abused Harley for years, he emotionally abused and manipulated people all across gotham on a daily basis. He was just another Hawkmoth, but with more physical violence in place of magic.
With these thoughts strengthening her resolve, Marinette narrowed her eyes at the man who donated half of her DNA. She let her anger boil into her irises, hitting him with one of the few traits she knew she inherited from him.
Her ability to intimidate others on the tip of a hat.
“No,” she growled back at him. She took a deep breath. It had taken her a while, but she refused to be ashamed of who she was regardless of her blood relation. She would have no problem using the very things she inherited from Joker against him. She might have gotten most of Harley’s personality, she might have inherited her mother’s habit of falling in love hard, fast, and obsessively, but she also had Joker’s defiance. His bone-deep inability to be stopped from doing exactly whatever the fuck he wanted.
And then, there were Marinette’s own traits. The ones that were completely her own, developed over her life organically. Like her refusal to bow down to bullies, her creativity, her ability to take even the most chaotic situation and see some sort of balance and sanity in it that she could use to her advantage.
That she WOULD use to her advantage. The shadows she saw move out of the corner of her eye gave her the chance to do exactly that, she just needed to buy a few more seconds. Just a few more seconds.
“Excuse me?” Joker growled right back, his own intimidation, honed over more years than Marinette had been alive and thus much more potent than her own, reading its ugly head as he stalked towards her. His face was pulled down into an ugly snarl, his shoulders tensed and back straight as he glared right at her. From his spot on the metal walkway, he was easily able to reach over the railing and grab her chin in one pale, viciously strong hand. “I think you’re misunderstanding something here, little Marionette. I’m your father. Half of your life came directly from ME. That makes you my puppet. You exist to follow my orders,” his right grip suddenly let go, leaving behind the beginnings of a bruise as his entire demeanor changed from angry to cheerful. He spread his arms as if gesturing to the whole chemical plant victoriously, and an unnaturally large smile curved over his lips and bared yellowing teeth at her. “But that’s okay. I’ll forgive you this time, you haven’t learned any better yet. That’s why we’re here. We need to cleanse you of all those icky bad habits you’ve learned up until now, all you need is a little,” he bounced in place with a wicked smirk to illustrate his next words— “jumpstart. A little acid goes a long way to enlightenment you know, you’ll see my side of things in no time. And with my blood in you, you’ll make a better sidekick than that idiot Harley ever did. I can sense it, you’ve got a real talent for Chaos in you, it’s exciting, Heheeeheheee! Now then, we should probably speed things along before our family reunion is cut short. Hang in there, my little Marionette,” the man actually had the gall to spin in place while humming a tune cheerfully before all but dancing over to the lever that held Marinette’s length of chain in the air over the vat of chemicals below her. “Everything will clear up in that little head of yours in just a second!”
There! Right as Joker pulled the switch to lower her into the bubbling vat underneath her, Marinette was able to finish untying her hands. She couldn’t contain a small yelp as gravity flung her body forward, leaving her upside down on the chain for a brief moment. That was when the chain started lowering rapidly, and Marinette was barely able to rip the rope off of her ankles in time to swing off of it and onto the metal walkway that came up right next to the giant metal container of liquid death and insanity. Joker had barely enough time to shout in rage before the windows near the ceiling shattered, admitting the city’s vigilantes themselves. Batman, Nightwing, Red Robin, Red Hood, Robin, and evening Black Bat all landed on the same metal platform above Marinette’s head that Joker was still on, buying the teen time to start running. But she didn’t go towards the exit right away, instead heading right up the stairs into the thick of the fight. Robin briefly separated from where Joker was managing to hold his own, goons flooding from side doors to inhibit the heroes in their attempt to bring their boss down.
The katana-using vigilante kept one eye on Marinette the whole time, suspicious of why the girl would come back up if not to help her father. But that wasn’t what she did, instead she flipped and kicked and punched her way through the quickly growing sea of Joker thugs until she reached a small pink purse that had been abandoned near the lever that had nearly sent her into liquid insanity. Three thugs surrounded her right as she snatched the purse up and slung it over her shoulder, but Robin barely had the chance to head over before she was heaving the men, who were all easily three times her size, over her shoulder and was slamming elbows into soft spots and the side of her hand into pressure points. By the time Robin got to her side, all three men were unconscious and bound to wake up in utter agony.
Marinette glanced up, getting ready to haul Robin over her shoulder as well before she realized who he was. She let her shoulders relax just a tick, sighing in relief before returning her eyes to scanning their surroundings. She shot him a brief grin.
“Good thing my adoptive mother, Mom, Momma Ivy, and Auntie Selina all made sure I knew how to take down a small army on my own, huh?” She asked rhetorically before they were both unceremoniously dragged back into the giant brawl.
—*—*—*—*—*
“Nettie-pie!”
“Marigold!”
Harley and Pamela Quinzel-Isley shoved down anyone and everyone who dared block their direct path to their daughter. The girl of the hour stood next to the bat clan, a shock blanket held tightly around her shoulders as she did her best to finish her statement to both the vigilantes and Commissioner Gordon.
“You untied yourself… from a ship-grade knot in high quality rope… with a phone charm?” They heard Gordon ask incredulously, to which Marinette could only give a lopsided smile. That was when her mom and stepmom crashed into her, enveloping her in a nearly suffocating hug.
“Gah— mom— momma Ivy—“ Marinette flailed in their arms for a bit before finally getting her head free and continuing her statement as if she didn’t have two of the most dangerous women in the city still giving her a bone crushing hug. “That’s better. Yes, Commissioner. You see, I realized when I was in the car with Joker, while I was pretending to still be unconscious, that one of the charms on my phone had pretty sharp corners that I could use like a serrated edge if I had enough time. So I carefully detached it from my phone, and held it in my palm. It took almost an hour, but once Joker noticed I was awake I kept him talking so that he didn’t notice what I was doing even as he tied me up to that chain. Really, it’s just lucky that I was able to get it worn down in time,” Marinette rubbed the back of her neck with a nervous chuckle. “But regardless, I think Batman and his partners,” she nodded to the listening vigilantes just to the side of her. “Were close enough that I would have been caught anyway, I just wanted to make sure they had less work to do. The sooner I freed myself, the sooner ‘Daddy Dearest,’” she grimaced as she mockingly used the same term Joker had tried to get her to say earlier that night. “Could go back behind bars where he belongs.”
“Oh my little Nettie-cake,” Harley cried, finally pulling back from the hug long enough to wipe her cheeks. It was clear that she had been crying for a while, and her colorful pigtails were mussed and tangled from where she must have been tugging on them in worry. “You were right. I’m so sorry, I never should have let you come to Gotham when I knew he was out of Arkham.”
Marinette was quick to shake her head frantically, pulling her arms out of Ivy’s hold so she could grasp Harley’s shoulders firmly. “No. No, Mom, I’m fine! And besides, we knew I couldn’t stay secret forever. I really like staying with you and Momma Ivy! Everything turned out fine though, and he’s headed back to Arkham. It’s okay.”
“It’s not okay, Nettle,” Pam argued, distracting herself by running her hands through Marinette’s bangs. She had only known the girl for two years, but that was more than long enough for her to consider the teenager as her own. “He took you right out from under our noses. You were supposed to be safe in our home, and he still got to you. That’s not okay. We weren’t able to protect you like we should have been. Maybe you should go back to Paris early.”
“What?! No way!” Marinette argued, eyes wide. “This is the first time I’ve been able to ever visit you guys in Gotham, I’m not letting some psycho sperm donor keep me from enjoying time with my family! I came here knowing full well that it was dangerous. I’m not gonna just run away after one bad experience.”
Harley snorted, and then devolved into uncontrollable giggles. “Heh— psycho sperm donor. Good one, sugar!”
Marinette smiled and rolled her eyes good naturedly at her mom’s usual immature antics. Seeing as Gordon had walked away muttering to himself a short while ago, Marinette pulled herself the rest of the way away from her moms and turned to the vigilantes. Without a second’s pause, she bowed to them just like her Maman Sabine taught her.
“Thank you for helping save me. I know it’s probably a shock that I’ve been kept secret from you guys all this time, but I hope you don’t lump me in with the likes of the green-haired half of my DNA. I’m staying with my Moms in their apartment, if you guys decide to patrol by our place like I suspect, I’ll leave some baked goods and coffee out for you on our patio. It’s the least I can do for you all after tonight. And don’t be too hard on Auntie Selina. Me and Mom swore her to secrecy, even from you guys.”
Batman jerked a little at the mention of Catwoman’s real name, jaw twitching for a second. Behind his cowl, his eyes narrowed. Marinette laughed, easily reading his body language and expression.
“She never told me who you are, but she didn’t exactly hide it either. It was easy to put the last pieces together on my own. But don’t worry, SHE swore me to secrecy too. I won’t tell anyone.
“How the hell are you related to the Laughing Asswipe from Hell?” Red Hood blurted out, his confusion clear even from behind his hideous helmet. Marinette burst into giggles, and both Pamela and Harley smiled knowingly.
“Mom gave me up for adoption when I was born, so I spent my whole life in Paris up until now,” she admitted. “Mom didn’t visit me for the first time until I was eight, and she and my adoptive parents are so awesome that it must’ve suffocated the worst traits from his DNA before they had a chance to develop,” she guessed out loud with a good natured smile.
Batman grunted. Marinette knew that one run-in wasn’t enough for them to trust her. After all, she was still the biological daughter of their arch enemy. But she didn’t mind, she understood the caution even if she didn’t fully agree with it. They weren’t outright hostile, despite the fact that Robin had never stopped glaring at her since they fought back-to-back against the mob of thugs earlier. She could live with their suspicion, as long as they continued to not be outright rude or mean to her.
At least she could empathize with Adrien now, whenever she figured out how to break it to him that Hawkmoth was definitely Gabriel and couldn’t be anyone else. Hopefully she could help soften the blow for him a little.
Harley and Ivy were starting to herd Marinette towards their car and take her back home, where they could continue to smother her in care and make sure she didn’t have even a scratch on her, when Robin’s voice stopped them all in their tracks.
“You are a surprisingly capable combatant.”
Marinette froze, blinking in surprise for a second before turning to stare at Robin in shock. The rest of the Bat Clam was doing the same, nobody expecting Robin of all people to be the first to directly complement Marinette. He tutted, crossing his arms, but never moved his gaze away from Marinette’s eyes.
“But your form could use some work. Most of your style is incredibly improvised, which I can appreciate since you do it well, but you would benefit from more structure in your fighting. I will set up a time and place for us to spar. We start in two days, if you think you can handle it.”
It took a while for what Robin said to sink in, and another few seconds for Marinette to decipher what his semi-aggressive, order-phrased proposal really meant. And she smiled.
“It’s a date.”
—*—*—*—*—*
Woo! This started off a little rough, but I really like how it ended up! Thank you, Anon!
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one-real-imonkey · 3 years
Note
Well, you talked about the chips, so prompt:
Guard having their chips removed and what happened after
Not for the first time, my mind has created an AU of an AU, so this is another way things could have gone from the point where Hound revealed the footage.
Please enjoy.
———
Fox went into surgery alone, his siblings off planet or in surgery themselves. The Jedi with him was kind, but they weren’t who he would have wanted.
He woke with Cody by his side, and as he shifted to try to get more comfortable and get a better look, he saw Rex on the other, asleep in the chair in what couldn’t be a comfortable position, worry creasing his face.
Cody helped him shift but not sit up with a clearly relieved smile and he took in the recovery room he was in.
It was mostly empty, and though it was designed to hold up to 16 patients, only one other bed was occupied.
Hound was in the bed behind Cody, and next to him Pup, oddly in a chair not a bed, still sleeping. He couldn't see Thorn or Thire or Stone or any of the others, but he had to trust they were ok, because it was over and Hound, his oh so brilliant selfless little brother, had done it.
Palpatine was gone. The war was over, or at least on pause.
His vode were safe.
"Fox, you're awake?"
"Yeah Rex’ika, I’m awake. How are you?"
They both had bandages covering new scars, a scar he was sure he now shared, like all of them. Another way they were identical.
"I'm... shellshocked, but I'm coping. But what about you, how are you?"
"Headachy."
It was true, his head was killing him. But then, it wasn’t like he’d never worked through a headache before.
Wait...
"How are you two here already? No way you made it back to Coruscant that quickly."
"Fox..." Cody paused so he and Rex could exchange a look, and that never meant anything good, "you've been unconscious for a week. We both came back, went in and out of surgery, recovered, but you just wouldn't wake up."
“Well I had mine on the ship, but that’s not the point. You’ve missed a week vod.”
"Do… do they know what was wrong?"
He had a few ideas, none of them good.
"They have a few theories. It's happened a few times across the whole GAR, and they're comparing the chips they had to the rest of us, and... Fox all of the Guard took longer to wake up than any other unit, by a few hours. All your chips have been slightly different, they're not sure why yet but..."
"Use. Palpatine. Using them probably did something."
"Thats what the Jedi are guessing."
"Hound?"
"Get some rest vod."
"No, no!" Fox struggled to sit up against his brothers holding him down, "No, tell me what's wrong!"
"Fine, just calm down."
"Fox, Hound's chip was broken, literally split. They had to take it out in two parts. They're not sure how or why, but it also shows the signs of being active. They don't know why he hasn't woken yet, but his vitals are steady, the healers say it's when he wakes, not if."
"He's not the only one," Rex added, "one of my men is suffering some after affect issues, balance and dizziness and weaknesses in his left limbs, his chip was rotted. And while Wolffe went in and out of surgery no problem, his chip was broken, but then, chances were it was the same injury that cost his eye. There have been a few issues across the GAR, and the Jedi are helping all of us."
"Stone, Thire, Fix, Thorn? They’re ok. And Wolffe, Bly, Ponds?"
"All fine. Fix and Stone are bullying the medics for more intel and Thire and Thorn are resting with other members of the Guard. They'll be back soon. Pup isn't even meant to be in here, the healers tried to kick him out to make him sleep but..."
Fox looked over to where his vod'ika was asleep against Hound's bed. Like hells anyone was going to be able to keep Pup out, not with how much Hound had done. He was actually surprised the rest of the Guard hadn't shown up and refused to leave.
“And the others?”
“Wolffe and Ponds are with the Council, Bly is with General Secura in the lower parts of the Temple setting up accommodation for the Clones.”
“…tell me.”
He knew his vodes faces, knew their expressions. Something had happened.
“Palpatine was arrested, but some of his supporters have claimed he’s being framed. That Hounds footage was faked, that the Jedi and Clones were attempting a coup. It’s… people like Senator Amidala and Organa are on our side, quite a few planets have backed us, but… but for now all Jedi and Clones have been labelled deserters and for deserting traitors, and marked for death. The Temple is locked down and defended, and between the proof and everything we set up, there’s a good chance things will go our way…”
“But we’re having to prepare for the outcome that it won’t. Palpatine planned for everything.”
“Exactly, but we have it in hand, so you can get some rest. There’ll be plenty for you to do once you’re back on your feet. Take a few days, Vod, you’ve more than earned it.”
———
Ohh this is a fun AU AU, I might have to continue this. Some other POV of what’s happening, Hound waking up. Hmmmmm.
Thanks for the prompt. Hope you enjoyed.
Inbox is always open for prompts and headcanons and asks and all sorts. :-D
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retrievablememories · 3 years
Text
afterdeath | lucas
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title: afterdeath pairing: vampire!lucas x fairy!reader genre: angst, forbidden romance, fantasy, vampire!au request: May I request a Vampire!Lucas with a fairy!s/o (Forbidden romance perhaps?) word count: 8.6k warnings: descriptions of death and sickness, mentions of a funeral, viewing, and funerary preparations, major character death (but...with a slight twist), mentions of blood and drinking blood, smoking cigarettes, arguments/conflict, mentions of physical violence, some romeo and juliet elements? a/n: hmm this fic probably could’ve been more detailed but i was trying to avoid triggering my own damn self with so much talk of death...ha...not sure why i went this route but i wanted a forbidden romance with an actual decent ending for both characters and this was the first idea i had recommended songs: OLLA - jhené aiko
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Year 1508
“We’ve felled the demon!”
“Indeed, we have!”
Cheers ring through the dawn as a large group of fairies dance around an immense bonfire, raising their shouts of celebration to the sky. Within the fire burns the body of the Primitiva Vampire, the One and Only Pureblood, haphazardly thrown over the wood pile and relieved of her head—which sits near the bottom of the burning mass of wood, her face still twisted in a mien of anger.
As the sky begins turning lighter with the onset of sunrise, the fairies continue their celebration, staying close to the fire all the while. They carry large flaming torches to guard against any of the Primitiva Vampire’s followers who might try to sneak upon them and strike in that sliver of space where the sun has yet to rise.
The Primitiva Vampire had a long reign of terrorizing fairies and turning humans and other supernatural creatures into vampires. Each transformed being became a terrible revenant, one which viciously hunted villages and stole into people’s homes for more blood, more death, and more unwilling adherents to the vampiric cult.
Mass numbers of fairies had been decimated once the vampires first tasted their blood and took a unique liking to it. For over 200 years, the carnage continued on at the hand of the Primitiva Vampire, who had one day blinked into existence in a way that could never really be explained by any conceivable means, either human or magic. And without ever giving a hint to her strange conception, she tore across cities and towns, converting others into night creatures like herself and building a loyal following of half-bedeviled beings.
When fairy populations had dwindled to nearly extinction-level quantities, they were left no other choice—fight back or be wiped completely from the universe’s ledger. So they took up arms, honed their magic skills, and did just that.
And now, all their efforts culminate in this blood-stained morning. It marks a much-anticipated moment of revelry before they have to return to their posts to watch for the night creatures inevitably waiting on the other side of the sunset, ready to avenge their slain Goddess.
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Present Day
“You probably shouldn’t be here right now.”
“I wanted to come,” Lucas replies, taking your hand is his large one. “I wanted to see you.”
“I can figure that.” You laugh quietly, a little afraid to let your voice rise higher in case it carries too far. “But that doesn’t mean you should’ve come.”
Lucas holds your hand tightly. His skin is cold against yours due to his slow blood, and colder still from the chill permeating the air. It’s only one of many vampiric traits that the other fairies would think of as strange or barbaric, but you don’t see it that way. The chilliness just reminds you solely of him.
“Well, I missed you. And I’m here now, so you’ll just have to deal with me.”
The building you’re standing behind is damp, old, and dilapidated, and it’s not even one of your pre-designated meeting places. In front of you is a rusted chain link fence, which barricades a field of tall and unkempt grass. More aged and crumbling buildings scatter themselves across the distance, taken over by grass and climbing vines.
You don’t know what’s out here. This is one place within your district you haven’t been to before. It was Lucas’s idea to come here, after your last meeting place had nearly been discovered and he found it too risky to keep going there.
The entire city of Beijing is split up into different districts, each belonging to a different faction of supernatural beings. Some nonhuman races have close ties with each other and allow frequent cross-district mingling; others are sworn enemies, forbidden to fraternize with each other under pain of death. In these latter cases, crossing into another’s territory without express permission—or in rare situations, ties to a powerful ally (or allies) on the other side—is asking to get arrested, injured, or worse.
Lucas would be your tie to the vampire side and you his tie to the fairy side if your species weren’t centuries-long enemies. Instead, you’re relegated to having him sneak in and out of your district and hide what he is with blood-scent blockers and eye contacts to make the trickery easier to get away with. There’s only so much you can do to disguise your fae nature; stepping into vampire territory would turn you into a shining beacon.
“Hmm…” you sigh, shaking your head with a small smile on your face. You grasp Lucas’s hand so you’re now holding it with both of yours. “How long do you think we can keep this up? Going from place to place like this. Hiding like criminals.”
Lucas gives a lopsided grin—one that cannot morph into a full smile because of the sadness coloring it. “I don’t know. Forever, if we’re lucky.” He chuckles.
You stare at your intertwined hands, unaware of the sheer intensity of the longing expression on your face, though Lucas sees it clearly. It threatens to burn his heart to ash. “Unfortunately, fae don’t live forever like you do, so maybe not. Besides, your people would probably find out and come after me before we could even settle into a ‘forever.’”
He shakes his head fretfully at your words, squeezing your hand. “Do we have to talk about all that now? You know we don’t have much time together. Let’s just enjoy it for what it is.” Lucas pulls you into him, tucking your head into his shoulder.
“That’s fine by me,” you say, and resist the urge to make some dark joke about how scandalous it is for a fairy to have their neck so close to a vampire’s mouth—or a vampire’s anything.
You both stay together in that dingy and old spot for a while, talking in the dark until he tells you he has to go. He follows you the whole way back home to ensure you’re safe, keeping to the shadows until he sees you disappear past your front door. Then, he slips away again to head back to the familiar manor in his own district.
It’s nearly morning when Lucas gets back to the large house he shares with the other six men. By this time of day, he knows they will either be in bed or getting ready to turn in.
“Still visiting that fairy, I see.”
The unexpected voice doesn’t scare Lucas, but it does make his body tense up a bit in irritation and a slight sense of anticipation. He sighs and stops in his tracks on the way to his room, though he doesn’t face the clan leader just yet.
“Is that a problem? Because you know I’m not going to stop.”
Kun makes a noise of disbelief. “Of course it is. You know what the consequences are if anyone outside of us finds out.” Lucas turns to him slightly, and the look on Kun’s face is more disappointment—maybe even slight fear?—than anger. “I clearly can’t stop you from doing what you want to, but I can’t help you if the Association gets involved.”
Lucas rocks back on his heels and sighs, rolling his eyes at the mention of the vampire organization. “Fuck the Association. They’re nothing but a bunch of old ass hags who have no purpose in their lives other than ruling over every other vampire in the world.”
Kun looks weary at his words. “You really don’t care, do you, Xuxi. They’d have your heart on a stake if they ever heard that.” He pauses and rolls his eyes. “They’re also not that much older than me, so I wonder who you’re calling an ‘old ass hag’...”
“Isn’t it a good thing that they won’t hear it, then?” Lucas laughs, but it’s not an entirely humorous sound, and he gives Kun a searching look as his chuckles die off.
“Don’t look at me like that. I have no interest in telling them anything, mostly because I also have no interest in our whole clan being wiped out.”
Lucas nods, reaffirming his somewhat shaky but still present trust in Kun, needing the regular reassurances for his own calm. He stretches his arms above his head and takes a few steps like he’ll go to his room, though he doesn’t move to leave just yet. “Just don’t see what the big deal about all this is. All this over some ancient bloodsucker who died like 500 years ago...who cares.”
Kun winces again, though he doesn’t bother with reprimanding Lucas this time; he only shakes his head and sighs heavily like it’s already a lost cause. “A vampire and a fairy together is more than blasphemy—it’s ridiculous. It’s illogical. They all think we’re bloodsucking demons hellbent on killing them.”
“To be fair, there’s definitely a sect of vampire zealots or two who are trying to do exactly that despite the laws.”
Kun sighs. Lucas is right; what can he say to argue that? “Xuxi…”
“I’m telling you I’ll be fine, Kun-ge. You don’t need to worry about me and Y/N. Things have been going fine for this long.” Lucas nods, then heads off to his room for real this time. Kun watches him leave, feeling a lot less reassured than the younger man.
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Ten takes Xiaojun and Lucas on one of their weekly outings to a blood lounge. Blood lounges are an easy and accessible way for vampires to get blood, though the legalities of this practice are a little muddy. Before getting with you, Lucas didn’t mind drinking straight from the source—going to one of the back rooms and sucking some willing, vulnerable being just to the point of death—but now, it feels like a type of transgression. Drinking someone else’s blood can be an intensely intimate act, on the same level as sex depending on the context, and he doesn’t want to do anything to make you think he’d be unfaithful.
To his fortune, there is no club rule about having to feed off other beings; many vampires take their blood in fancy champagne glasses, just like drinks in a human club. He does that now as the three men sit in a darkly lit booth.
Their conversation is unexciting for a while, with Lucas keeping careful not to mention you or any of his recent visits to your district to avoid any prying ears in the lounge. However, things soon get interesting. “We all know how Renjun got taken off the Association’s Registry a year ago, right?” Ten asks suddenly.
“Yes, of course.” Xiaojun answers like he’s already bored of this turn in the conversation. “That’s what happens whenever a vampire dies.”
Ten nods, but his eyes are wide like he has a secret he’s itching to tell. “But I don’t think he actually died.”
Lucas’s ears perk up at that.
“Why?” Xiaojun asks.
“He was seeing that human before he supposedly died, you know—”
“The one who lost it and drove the stake in his heart? We all know how it happened—”
“Can you let me finish? Anyway, I’ve heard some...suggestions that he faked his death—that maybe he got a magic user to set the whole crime scene up and make it look like it was real. Illusory magic, or something like that.”
Xiaojun sits forward. “A magic user. As in a fairy? Or a witch? Who?”
“I don’t know, just someone who uses magic. People are starting to think he and the human faked it all and ran away to Tianjin. I heard someone even claimed they saw somebody who resembled him when they went to Tianjin recently, though I don’t know how true that is…”
Xiaojun’s interest is thoroughly engaged now. “Think the Association will go looking for him, if it's true?”
“I don’t know if they’d care enough to hunt down an unregistered vampire who’s laying low and not creating chaos with other citizens. We all know Tianjin is way more relaxed about inter-species relationships, too. But the Association doesn’t like looking stupid. And that kind of trick definitely makes them look stupid.”
Lucas sits back, taking all of this information in. He is uncharacteristically quiet, but he doesn’t know what to make of that situation or why Ten is telling them about it. He thinks he can guess why, though, by the way Ten’s gaze lingers on him, and that scares him a little. The way this rumor piques a forbidden interest in him scares him. Lucas lifts the glass of blood to his lips and drinks from it, trying to distract himself from the current conversation.
“All this for a damn human. Only an idiot would try something like that,” Xiaojun says, shaking his head.
“Maybe a smart one. It did get him off the Registry.”
“How can you be a smart idiot?!” Ten and Xiaojun start arguing over the semantics of the term, and Lucas watches them in amusement, though his mind remains in two different places for the rest of their time in the blood lounge.
Later that night when they are back at the manor, Lucas pulls Ten aside, just like the older man expected him to.
“What’s wrong?” Ten asks, though his expression shows he already knows exactly what’s the matter.
“You...the stuff you said about Renjun earlier. I…” Lucas doesn’t know how to start or break his idea to him softly, so he decides to just say it. “Is it really possible?”
“I think it’s possible. It wouldn’t be the first time someone tried to get off the Registry…though many other attempts were way less successful.” Then Ten hesitates before saying, “You could try it.”
“Are you serious?”
“I am.” Ten’s expression softens a little. “I know you and Y/N love each other a lot, but there’s no way the Association will ever let you stay together if they find out. Y/N’s life could actually be in danger. Both of you are, every moment you spend together while living in these districts. If you really want to stay with Y/N, then…”
“...But I wouldn’t be able to see any of you again.” You and Lucas have become so entwined with one another that he can hardly imagine a life without you, but he also finds it difficult to picture his existence without his brothers. They’ve become like blood family to him over the last couple centuries.
“Yeah.” Ten sighs deeply, and although his reply is short, Lucas knows that one word is carrying the weight of all of his stress and sorrow about the idea. “Maybe we could find a way to visit you sometimes. Get the fairies or witches to do some of their magicky shit.” Ten laughs quietly. “But...it’s still just an idea. You don’t have to do it.”
Lucas shakes his head slowly. He wants to put the idea to bed and try to continue on with his life, managing his clandestine visits to your district when he can. But now that he knows of an alternative way, no matter how unreasonable or unbelievable it is, he doesn’t think he’ll be able to forget about it. “Kun-ge is going to kill you once he finds out this was your suggestion. You know that, right?”
Ten shrugs, and the sadness lifts momentarily in the curve of his lips. “He can try.”
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The next time you and Lucas meet up, it’s in yet another different place under an ancient and mostly abandoned bridge. As a precaution, you stand together underneath the darkness of the bridge and stay out of sight, though there are few chances of anyone being around to see you in the first place.
He has to muster up the courage to tell you of his idea, unsure of how you’ll react or what you’ll think of it. It’s a lot to ask of you. Your kinships and friendships are not as extensive as his, only having a brother and two cousins left in the world, but he doesn’t know if he could ever ask you to leave them behind like this. Or if he could shake off the guilt that would remain from it.
“There might be a way for us to change things…” Lucas starts, skipping the build-up because he knows it would take him forever to think of something appropriate to say. “But I don’t know if you’ll like it.”
“Change things?” You glance at him curiously. You wish you could see the deep red of his irises, but they are hidden behind his brown contacts. “As in, with us?”
“Yes. So that maybe we wouldn’t have to sneak around anymore. Or at least...not sneak around as much as we do now.”
“What is it?” you ask. Despite yourself, your wings flutter against your back as wonder and excitement rise in your chest. You and Lucas have waxed poetic many times before about how you wish things could be different; and neither of you have ever been able to come up with a workable plan. But now, his claim that maybe something is possible has you dangerously curious.
“Taking myself off the Registry. I could basically just...disappear. The Association can’t harm what technically no longer exists.”
You stare at him in confusion. “But you can’t do that, right? Only under special circumstances…”
Lucas sees the question in your eyes and nods. “Right. Like if I die…” You flinch, shaking your head immediately. “...or pretend I’ve died.” This makes you pause, not expecting to hear something like that come from him.
“Pretend...you’ve died. Faking your own death?”
“I know it sounds crazy, but...there’s another vampire who we think has done it before. And...it worked. Supposedly.”
You shake your head again, but you turn the idea over in your mind. “How would you even do that? Someone would have to know you’re not really dead. That can’t be as easy as it sounds...”
Lucas swallows hard. “I know, it doesn’t, but maybe if we plan it right...I think we could pull this off. Some of the others...already know about it.” Only Ten, really, but that’ll inevitably change soon.
Your heart is hammering in your chest just thinking about this plan—the small, undefined plan that it is—and you’re unsure how to approach it. “If we leave under those circumstances, we can’t come back here to Beijing. Which means we won’t see anyone else again, our families and friends...”
“You understand that.” Lucas’s voice comes out strained.
You sigh, wringing your hands. “I do.”
Lucas hangs his head, closing his eyes tightly. “It’s too much to ask of you. We can just forget about this, really. I know sneaking around has been difficult, and I just—”
“I never said I wouldn’t agree to it,” you say softly, interrupting him before he can begin deriding himself about the idea.
Lucas’s head perks up again, and you both look at each other for a long moment. A cold night breeze flows through your clothes and rustles your wings, which remain tucked close against your back.
“Just think of it as leaving the nest, I guess,” you say, though there are tears welling in your eyes. “Growing up and making a life for ourselves. We can do that...right?”
Lucas bites his lip and closes his eyelids to stave off the tears trying to form in his own eyes. “Yeah. We can do that. Even if it’s a bit...unconventional.”
You nod hurriedly, wiping your eyes with the backs of your hands before any more tears can make their way out. “If you really want to do this, then we need to visit my brother.”
Your brother is predictably not thrilled about the idea. He likes Lucas well enough, but he’s never been very good at hiding his skepticism about your relationship. Though he would never say this to you directly, he never expected your relationship to make it past a few months; and yet it’s been a year and a half since you and Lucas started seeing each other. Maybe he’d be glad about your relationship’s stability if your partner was anyone other than a vampire. Alas, he instead spends all his time stressing over whether either of you will be found out at any moment’s notice.
“You’re playing with fire,” your brother says as he sits down at his desk within his apothecary office. He shakes his head the entire time, but he rifles through his collection of books on magic anyway. If there is anyone who knows a potion or spell that could work for this scheme and would actually be willing to keep it all secret, it’s your brother.
“I know that, Aldriel.” You cross your arms, sighing impatiently at your brother’s continuous reprimands since you’ve stepped through his door. “That’s why we came to you. You’re one of the best magic wielders and potionists around.”
“Oh, I’m well aware. No need to blow smoke up my ass,” Aldriel replies, never one to let a moment to brag slip away. He continues flipping through his book fast enough to make the words on the pages blur, his brow creased with focus. He is paying attention to the words and pictures on the pages, though you also know him well enough to realize this is him trying to distract himself from the many thoughts that must be crowding his brain.
“Don’t be so worried about it,” you say, trying to speak against the lump that’s suddenly forming in your throat. “You’ve always complained about wanting me out of your hair, anyway.”
Aldriel pauses in flipping through his spell book to look directly at you now, his brows creased even further and his face creating a visage of bitter desperation. “Not like this.”
Sighing, you turn away from him and let him go back to his textbook, knowing you’d probably start to cry if you look at him any longer. And who knows what will happen once that begins.
You go back to Lucas, who is sitting in the other room with his face turned to the window. It is nighttime and the blinds are closed, so you know he’s not looking at anything in particular. His mind must be similarly preoccupied.
“You okay?” you ask, touching his arm.
“Fine,” he answers, though he doesn’t turn to you. He just grasps your hand where it slides down to his own, gripping your fingers tightly. “As fine as I can be in this situation, I guess.”
You sit down in front of Lucas on the floor’s intricately decorated rug, resting your head against his knee. “It’ll be okay.” You aren’t sure of the words when they leave your lips, but you have to believe in them or else all will be lost.
You both spend a few hours at Aldriel’s place. At one point, you try to prod Lucas into going back to his clan to avoid raising suspicions for being gone too long—you can just get the potion to him some other day—but he insists it’ll be easier for him to stay and receive the potion now.
Finally, in the hour before dawn, your brother’s door opens and he steps through. “It’s ready.”
Both you and Lucas come alert at that, and you step back into Aldriel’s apothecary to see what he’s developed.
“This is an advanced death glamor potion,” your brother says, holding up a small glass bottle. “It contains a magic incantation that will leave you dead for a week and only a week. Seven days. Your body will remain in perfect stasis, so there’s no risk of the regular side effects that come with death.”
“A week?” you repeat, nervousness coursing through your body. Lucas looks equally apprehensive, and he squeezes your hand tighter.
Aldriel nods, pushing his glasses further up his nose. “That should be enough time to take care of the funeral arrangements and make everyone else think you’ve passed.” He says the last bit while gesturing to Lucas. “I’m not super clear on how vampire funerary customs work, though, so—”
Lucas nods. “No, it’ll work. That’s enough time.”
Your brother’s mouth creases into a thin line. “Good.” He passes the vial to Lucas, makes an expression like he might say something else, and then shakes his head, glancing to you instead. “You plan to go to Tianjin, right?”
“That’s right,” you say quietly.
“You’ll need to find a place to stay, then, until you can get one of your own. And I think we both know exactly where that will be.”
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The potion works just as Aldriel said it would. It’s hard to know whether to be dismayed or relieved about this, though the former emotion quickly wins out with everyone.
Lucas takes it a week after meeting with your brother and procuring all the necessary fake documents, claiming it’s best not to wait any longer for it. You feel apprehensive about doing it so soon; or maybe you just want to stall for a little while longer. By now the other five men in his clan all know, each with varying reactions to it but ultimately unable to do anything to change his mind—not even Kun.
On the night Lucas uses the potion, Kun makes one last ditch attempt at reasoning.
“You don’t need to go to this extreme,” the older man insists. Though his voice is cold and sharp and deceptively calm, his entire face is a picture of perfect anger. Everyone had already had their turns talking to Lucas alone and telling him what they needed him to hear—and now it’s just Kun left.
“It’s my decision,” Lucas says, keeping his voice steadier than he feels. “I want to be with Y/N. There is no other way.”
“You’re endangering the entire clan with this. You’d throw us all away for one person?” Kun’s eyes are red-rimmed, but not just from the rage; Lucas knows he’s been crying. Lucas shuts his own eyes, his forehead creasing as he presses the pads of his fingers to his temples.
“Don’t say it like that.”
“That’s exactly what it is.”
“You wouldn’t understand.” Lucas shakes his head, knowing he is treading on very dangerous waters with what he’s about to say. As if the situation weren’t already contentious enough. “You closed yourself off to love a long time ago. After Jingyi died. You just wouldn’t know.”
The vivid red hue of anger bleeds into Kun’s irises at the mention of his late human lover, and he has to make a very concentrated effort not to reach for the younger’s neck. “How dare you speak of her.”
Lucas opens his eyes again and looks directly at his elder now. “You’ve let the Association run your life too much,” he says, though the words come out sounding a bit defeated. He’s not even sure why he invokes Kun’s lover now; maybe he is trying to make the split easier by provoking the other man into hating him. “You’ve let them beat it into you that love is not worth trying for. What did you gain from that, in the end? But more loneliness.”
Lucas gets the breath knocked from him when Kun slams him up against the wall, and the unpleasant sound of wood splintering strikes against his eardrums. A long vertical crack forms in the wood behind Lucas, but not wide enough to make the wall separate completely. Not using his full strength, then, Lucas thinks to himself.
Kun looks for all the world like he might kill Lucas then and there without the younger man ever needing to take a potion—just bite his heart right out. He crumples Lucas’s shirt in his hands, fisting the fabric tightly enough to create small rips in it. His irises are the color of newly spilled arterial blood, and alongside the red rimming of his eyes from his earlier crying, it makes for an agonizing sight—one that sears itself into the back of Lucas’s mind. It’s made even worse by the new tears spilling down the older man’s face.
He chokes out through the tears, “You cannot do this. I raised you. You would have me destroyed twice?”
Lucas wishes he could shut every one of his senses off right now, but he can only manage to shut his eyes, once again, against the pain in the other man’s gaze. “I’m sorry, Kun-ge.”
After that, Lucas goes back to his own room and sits on the bed for a long time, replaying the events in his head and growing colder with the realization of what he’s about to do. He stares at the small vial on his dresser until he can’t stare at it anymore, and then he downs it all at once. He looks at the vial with renewed interest as it actually disappears once the fluid is gone, the glass evaporating away in the palm of his hand like water droplets under the sun. No evidence.
Lying on his side, he stares at the wall across from his bed and waits for the spell to begin working. He doesn’t know how much time passes, but eventually his vision begins to blur, almost so imperceptibly that it’s difficult to realize until he notices everything in his field of view is doubled, objects bleeding out of their lines like pictures drawn by a drunken artist—there’s a strange ringing in his ears too, a sound on the edge of his hearing but still present, and he doesn’t know what any of it means, or if this is how other beings feel when they are on the brink of death—it’s frightening, and he feels a momentary pang of sympathy for other nonhumans and humans alike who have no choice but to experience this terrible ordeal at the closing of their lives—
It’s harder to keep his eyes open now, so he closes them and lets all sounds and sensations fade out of his hearing—he only holds one last memory of you in his mind, of the soft and filmy texture of your wings underneath his fingertips, of you laughing whole-heartedly at something silly he’d said, and he joins his hands together in the universal symbol of prayer even as they grow weaker, hoping and praying even to his cursed vampire ancestor that this won’t be the very last memory of you—
“Yes, he has...most certainly departed from this world.” 
An Association council member known as Belial announces this to the room of men after doing a thorough check of Lucas’s body. His voice is distant and saddened. The texture of it is almost tangible, dragging everyone down with it like a physical thing—akin to a rock being dropped into a thin sheet. “Such a fledgling, too. Truly tragic and strange circumstances.” Belial stands beside the bed, shaking his head and looking down at the still form of the younger man as if he might discover an answer if he stares for long enough. “Was there no indication…?”
“He was probably exposed to bad blood,” Ten replies, his voice tense and quiet. Though Kun is clan leader, he doesn’t say anything at all, leaving all the dirty work of explaining the lie to Ten.
Belial’s gaze turns to Ten. He shifts his head slightly to turn his ear towards him, as if he didn’t understand what the other man said. “Bad...blood? As in death by blood weakness?”
The room feels like it’s been sucked of air once these words are spoken, and the younger men shift uncomfortably. Sicheng never lifts his gaze to look at Belial, though Yangyang’s eyes keep darting between Belial and Lucas on the bed like he’s waiting for something to happen. Hendery is just as anxious beside Yangyang, both of them passing uneasy energy between each other. Xiaojun’s face is still fixed into the same permanent frown it had been in since Lucas first told them of the plan. His eyes remain downcast and fixed on Lucas, silently asking Why did you have to be the idiot this time?
“Yes, blood weakness. He hadn’t drank as much blood as usual in the last few days...maybe he seemed a little restless...but we didn’t think it was unusual. He...didn’t seem sick.”
“Where would he have gotten bad blood from? We vampires always take such care…” Belial’s tone turns condescending, as if he could expect no better from a young vampire—someone not even wise enough to tell bad blood from uninfected blood. How could one let themselves be taken out of this world by such a fundamental, basic mistake? Kun curls his fingers into a fist at his side, though he quickly remembers himself and tries to let them relax.
“The blood lounge,” Hendery blurts out. Every eye turns to him now, and Ten’s mouth thins into an agitated line. This isn’t what they agreed on. “M-maybe it was spoiled blood from the blood lounge. It had to be. He’s more careful than that…”
Belial’s eyes are whirling with so many emotions that it’s hard to pin any singular one down. “Serving bad blood, with or without knowledge of it, is an incredible offense within any vampire district. In that case, the establishment must be shut down—after an exhaustive investigation, of course.” This statement causes more discomfort among the gathered men, almost too much of it to be properly concealed.
“I think that won’t be necessary,” Kun interjects quietly. Belial looks at him with an expression that reeks of offense, and Kun returns the stare, glaring straight into the elder vampire’s eyes. “He died of blood weakness, most likely from drinking from some disease-ridden human. Even though he used the blood lounge and blood bags, he was in the habit of getting outside blood on occasion. It was a moment of poor judgment that cost him his life...and nothing more than that.”
A tense silence stretches over the room, and Belial’s eyes still don’t leave Kun’s. The other men remain statue-still, waiting to see what will happen—if it will work—until Belial says, “Yes. Of course. I’ll file his passing with the Keepers of the Registry, as protocol states.”
The other men stay quiet and motionless until Belial departs from their house.
“You used your compulsion on a council member,” says Yangyang, and even his voice is trembling when he speaks.
“I didn’t think that was possible,” Xiaojun notes, though his tone is more irritated than awed. “They’re all so much more advanced.”
That action obviously didn’t come for free, though, because Kun is holding his head like it hurts, turning away from the rest of them. “Such recklessness is not my style. Primitiva help us all. We’re all dead if we’re found out.”
“Why did you say that,” Sicheng deadpans, his words directed to Hendery. Even though Sicheng hasn’t said or done anything since stepping into the room, he looks thoroughly exhausted. “You almost gave us away.”
Hendery holds himself up on the bed as if he’ll collapse, his body bent with all the weight of their lies. He makes a motion like he might sit on the bed before remembering it’s where Lucas’s body is resting, and he straightens himself with some effort. “I...but he was thinking badly of Lucas. Like it was his fault.”
“It was,” Kun says faintly.
“You can’t let your emotions get the best of you right now. Just let me handle the talking.” Ten’s expression is stressed, and for a moment he starts to wonder if he should’ve ever said anything to Lucas at all.
Xiaojun shakes his head. “For now, there is a lot more we need to do than just talking.”
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Vampire funerary procedures are much different from what many other supernatural races are used to—even blasphemous to some. Everything is handled at the home of the deceased instead of a funeral home or mortuary, in keeping with the tradition of honoring one’s vampire ancestors—and ultimately, the Primitiva Vampire. After the Primitiva’s gruesome death hundreds of years ago, all that had been left was her ashes once the fire burned out, but her followers still gave the remains a proper processing and burial.
The men dress Lucas in one of his nicest suits and perform all the necessary actions that would be involved at a funerary home, including preparing the casket. All of them help throughout this process as tradition dictates, though it is more difficult than any of them expected it to be. (No one even makes a dark joke about you’ll have to do this for me when I’m gone, which speaks to their inner turmoil.)
The viewing is equally challenging to get through, if not more.
Many of their vampire friends and acquaintances attend, including various members of the Association. Everyone seems to buy the blood weakness lie perfectly, which means Kun’s compulsion worked as it should have. That knowledge does very little to relax any of them in the grand scheme of things, though.
Though they know Lucas is not really gone, the sight of him lying there in that dark coffin with other vampires looking sadly down at his still face and dabbing their tears away is deeply frightening.
The night of the viewing goes by at a glacial pace, and every other night after that up until the funeral passes even more slowly, like time itself has dropped its speed to prolong the torment.
When the last few straggling visitors for the viewing are gone, the men go their separate ways to try to deal with the not-so-small trauma of the day’s events. Kun goes up to one of the manor’s several wide balconies, one that they’ve all used as a familiar hangout spot or simply a place to unwind over the years. The sun will not rise for another forty-five minutes or so, giving him enough time to sit and think before it becomes unsafe. He is not very surprised when he finds Ten already there, though he decides not to leave.
“You stopped smoking three decades ago,” Kun comments, waving his hand in a pitiful attempt to clear out the smell of smoke filling the air. There’s no hint of teasing or personality in his voice, only hollowness and exhaustion. He sits beside the other man in one of the chairs sat outside. “Where did you even get cigarettes from?”
“Don’t worry about me. This is just for the nerves.”
“Why would I worry, it’s not like you can—” Kun pauses before saying the word they both know, realizing it hits far too close to home right now. Silence falls between them until Kun asks, “Do you actually believe this will be worth it?”
“It will. We’ve worked too hard for it not to be.” Ten takes a drag from his cigarette. “We’re giving them a second chance. Isn’t that something to feel good about?”
“A second chance. How interesting.”
“Everyone deserves one.” Ten glances at Kun from the corners of his eyes and doesn’t say anything more, but Kun already knows what he’s vaguely implying.
“And yet everyone doesn’t get one.”
“All the more reason to take the opportunity when it becomes possible.”
Kun doesn’t reply to that. Ten places a hand on his shoulder, but the older man meets this with little regard as he rises from his seat and walks away at a sluggish pace.
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You stand in the train station ready to buy a ticket, clutching documents falsifying your identity and feeling more terrified than you possibly ever have. Today marks the seventh day, and you don’t even know if Lucas is alive right now. It was too risky to have any of the other clan members contact you—not until you and Lucas meet up in the designated place. You know Aldriel is an excellent potion master, and if he says the spell will work as intended then it will, but there’s always that seed of doubt.
Your parting with Aldriel had been typical of your relationship with him—you crumbling before him and him pretending like he was fine, lending enough strength for the both of you to survive on, though you knew he was also bleeding from the heart.
“You better not forget about me,” you’d told him, smushing your face into the sleeve of his shirt to hide your tears, though there was no stopping the flow. It was staining his shirt sleeve right through.
He’d scoffed at you, though it was a watery sound. “I couldn’t if I wanted to.” He’d held your head closer against his shoulder, the both of you glued together in whichever way seemed fit when you’d walked through his door one last time to say goodbye. “We’ll see each other again. Don’t worry.”
You’d lifted your head from his shoulder then, looking at him with an aggrieved expression. “You shouldn’t make promises you can’t keep.”
Aldriel put his hand on top of your head, petting you like a small puppy. It was a thing you’d disliked since you were both children, but which only made your heart hurt even more now. “Have more faith in me than that, dear sister. You’ll see.”
When it’s your turn to get a ticket, you step up to the counter and hand over your information, trying to keep the shaking in your hands to a minimum. The teller behind the counter is also a fairy, their wings tucked against the back of their uniform but peeking out at the sides. You childishly try to take some solace in that, hoping there will be some solidarity between you two. Maybe they’ll be less critical of your legitimacy than any other being might be.
The process is scarily easier than you’d thought it would be, though you are sweating the entire time. A fake name and birth date, and no one suspected anything. All of this would have to be your new identity now if you were to live with Lucas in Tianjin without being discovered.
Getting on the train when it comes is only part of the long journey ahead. It doesn’t provide you with much relief, but you are at least thankful to have one segment of that journey complete.
It takes another cab to get to your destination once you’re off the train, but you soon arrive at the house of one of Aldriel’s friends and his similar-name twin—Raziel. Raziel was Aldriel’s most trusted and oldest friend, their woven history extending back to childhood. The three of you had grown up together, and you’d even been quite familiar with Raziel until they left for Tianjin some years ago. Now, you’re back in front of each other again under circumstances that you never could’ve guessed.
“You’re here. Good.” Raziel welcomes you into their house with open arms, tugging you into a jittery hug that you anxiously return.
“Have...you heard anything?” you ask, though you know it’s futile. Raziel wouldn’t have gotten any more information than you have, not until Lucas was standing right on their doorstep. They shake their head and give you a sympathetic look, patting your hands.
“He’ll be alright. Everything will go well. I believe it.” Raziel guides you further into their house, presumably towards the room you’ll be staying in while you’re there. “It’s all so romantic, though—even if it doesn’t feel like it right now. I hope you know you’re doing a good thing, in the end.”
You force your facial muscles into a smile, though it is a ghostly and fleeting one. “Thank you.”
Either way, you will have to wait until nighttime to know if Raziel’s words come true or not; the sun is still high in the sky. It’s only midday. You’ve never before hated the sunlight, but right now you curse the sun’s rays that elongate the time between you and your lover.
“You all, give him some damn space,” Ten says, trying to pull the younger vampires away so they won’t crowd around the coffin. “He doesn’t need the scare of his life looking at all your faces when he wakes up.” Despite trying his best to be the voice of reason, Ten also has to refuse the urge to station himself beside the coffin and watch for the slightest movement of eyelids, the tiniest twitch of the lips. His hands shake from the frayed nerves of a week of nothing but death and gloom, and even though he doesn’t need to sleep, he thinks he will be out for at least two days after all of this is over.
There is no set time, no designated signal for when—or the dreaded if—Lucas will awaken. The waiting game feels longer than it really is, especially with the hours until the funeral commences steadily counting down. However, it is not very long before there’s a big sucking breath coming from the coffin, the sudden sound of lungs being filled after a week of complete stillness. Everyone rushes back to the bier when this happens, peering wildly inside the coffin.
Lucas’s eyelids flutter for an eternity before shooting open. He immediately seems distressed upon waking, sitting up out of the coffin so quick that it stutters on its stand, and the others have to steady it before it tips over.
“Xuxi...are you okay?” Sicheng asks, voice hushed with nervousness. Despite his unending anger and distress about the situation, Kun has also crowded in to witness Lucas’s awakening, and he visibly sags with relief to see the younger man is at last awake.
The look in Lucas’s eyes is wild. They are momentarily afraid that maybe something has gone wrong with the potion—maybe it has affected his mind somehow and he doesn’t remember any of them— but then he says,
“Y/N. Is Y/N okay?”
“We don’t know,” Sicheng replies. “I mean, hopefully. But it was safer to not have so much cross-communication going on—you’ll have to go to the meeting spot to find out…”
Though the reasons for this make sense, this does not provide consolation. Lucas fumbles his way out of the coffin with the men’s help. It’s clear he’s still disoriented, which makes them even more nervous, if that’s possible at this point.
“You should drink some blood before you leave,” Hendery suggests, and everyone else agrees. Lucas won’t argue that, so he downs one of the blood bags they have stored until he feels a little more like himself.
“You have to go soon, the funeral is set to start in another hour—we’ll have to leave—” Yangyang warns him, though the words fade at the end of his sentence. He doesn’t know how to continue his thought or how to even begin saying goodbye.
Lucas fills that gap by steeling himself and saying his farewells to each of them in turn, though his eyes are troubled and his chin crumples like he might cry at any moment.
“Don’t say I never helped you out with anything,” Ten says, a few tears slipping down his cheeks. Being separated is painful, but it’ll ultimately serve its purpose of giving Lucas a chance at having a love that none of them could. After seeing Kun suffer the way he did after losing Jingyi, Ten wants to spare another one of his mates from dealing with the same fate.
When Lucas gets to Kun, there is a slight awkward silence and a swift exchange of glances—Lucas’s soft gaze butting up against Kun’s more solid one, which is simultaneously pleading to him and rebuking him for his actions. Still, Kun embraces him tightly enough that their bodies could join together.
“Xuxi…” Kun starts, “I don’t…” And then his words break, leaving an unspoken thought between them.
“One day, you’ll forgive me for this,” Lucas whispers to the older man. Kun gives him an endlessly hurt look in return, silently asking him how he could even conceive those words. When they separate from each other, it’s with much reluctance. Lucas looks at them all and nods once, his mouth tight with grief.
“Right. Time to go, then.”
You awake in the middle of the night to cool fingers on the side of your face, which startles you completely out of your sleep. Opening your eyes to an unfamiliar room scares you even more, and it takes you a moment to remember why your surroundings have changed. The knowledge comes back to you quickly when a large palm slips against your own, long fingers twining with yours.
“Xuxi,” you whisper quietly, the sound of his name hanging in the air like a prayer. One of the last few times you’ll be able to freely call him that, except in private.
You can’t see his figure well with all the lights turned out, but he had no problem navigating through the dark to reach your bedside. Wanting desperately to see his face, you fumble around for the bedside lamp switch before turning it on.
“Y/N…” Lucas’s face is suddenly illuminated to you in all its golden glory, a myriad of emotions flickering over his features.
“I didn’t even hear you come in,” you say breathlessly. You’re somewhat sad and wish you could’ve met him at the door, embraced him after his long trip, but it doesn’t much matter anymore because he’s here now.
“Poor Y/N. My baby must’ve been so tired.” Lucas bumps his forehead against yours, his whole body drooping with relief as he practically sinks into you, and you giggle a little as you complain about having to hold his weight up. There is a tingle behind your eyes that threatens to turn into a sudden burst of tears, but you try to hold them at bay for a while longer.
“Are we safe?” he whispers, needing your confirmation. “Raziel said so. But...are we really safe?”
“That’s frightening to even think about,” you reply quietly. “We can’t stay here too long, but for now…I think we will be.” Lucas nods without a word, still holding your hand. His blood-scent is completely absent, as it usually is when he’s around you, and you know he’s used the blockers. Soon, with the ability to go out together and not be arrested or threatened for it, that will not be necessary to disguise his vampirism anymore. “It...won’t be easy.”
“No, but the things we want out of life usually aren’t.”
You squeeze his hand. “Raziel will help take care of things for us. It won’t all be trials and tribulations. I hope.” More hesitantly, you ask him, “What was it like? Being dead?” You know that vampires, being once human, still have souls and an afterlife to go to like most other living beings.
The look on his face is worrying. He doesn’t meet your eyes; he only shakes his head and stares at your joined hands. “It was cold without you.” His lips pull into a weak and chapped smile, if only to quiet your worrying, but that doesn’t work as intended. You decide to leave it for now, figuring there will be more time to talk about it when he feels ready.
Turning the light back off, you both press your bodies together as close as they can physically get, Lucas’s head on your chest and his long legs all jumbled together with yours. You fall asleep before he does, lulled away by his comforting and safe presence. He stays awake for a while longer, staring into the dark and the dark staring back into him, before everything else falls away.
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novelist-becca · 3 years
Text
Won’t you let me in?
Fandom: The Owl House
Relationships: Eda & Luz
Summary: After the events of Separate Tides, Eda and Luz have a talk. Title is from the song “Strange Sight” by KT Tunstall.
AO3
What a day this is turning out to be, Eda thought as the so-called “Golden Guard” approached her and Luz. 
The witch had originally planned to take the money back to the house after checking in on the Selkidomus. 
But then she got caught, and it turned out Luz was on the ship instead of safe at home. (She had expected Luz to follow the cart home after they started driving back to the house) The kid had apparently wanted in on the bounty hunt, once again not knowing what she was getting into. Forget the money that was forgotten in the boiling sea, Luz was more important! Eda had of course questioned her.
“Now why were YOU on that ship to begin with? You could've gotten killed!” 
And then the Golden Chump showed up, and here they are. 
“Hello, criminals!” He said. “What's about to happen should be relatively painless. If you just do what I say.” 
“And why would we do that?” Luz retorted.
“Because none of you can use real magic.” He said, pointing a finger at the both of them. 
Eda narrowed her eyes and pointed back. “You don't know that.” Sure, glyph magic was different, but she won't stand the talk of it not being “real”. They haven't seen Luz in action.
The Golden Guard shrugged. “Maybe not. But I do know you're standing on a plant that eats flesh.” 
On cue, Eda and Luz looked down to see that they were indeed, standing on a flesh eating plant. And just in time, both of them could already feel the thing burning through their shoes. They yelped and lept to the side as the guard just watched. 
Ugh, stupid Golden Guard…, Eda thought. 
“Ahahaha! Okay.” He chortled. “The human will remain a sailor to repay all the money she lost.”
Eda tensed up at that idea. As if she'd allow Luz to become a pawn for the stupid emperor, just for some stupid money! 
Luz needs to be safe at home…
“While the Owl Lady will be arrested, again! For attacking one of the emperor's ships.” 
Luz looked at Eda, surprised. “Emperor’s ship?” She repeated. 
“They're the only ones worth robbing.” Eda replied. At least the kid didn't know. She thought. She supposed Luz wouldn't have gone if she knew this was a setup from Belos. She turned back to the guard.
“Why are you guys hunting the Selkidomus? It's a peaceful creature and you're provoking it!” Eda demanded. 
“The emperor ordered me to slay one. I'm just following orders.” The guard said nonchalantly. 
Losing her cool, Eda glared at him. “Well I'm just gonna smack you around a bit!” She shouted, snapping her arm off. Unfortunately, the Golden Guard was too quick for her, dodging her to the point where she tripped. 
“Leave Eda alone!” Eda heard Luz shout. Then the kid was tossed aside next to her. 
Apparently, the dingus wasn't finished with them quite yet, because he then threatened to dip them into the Boiling Sea, ouch, but then he changed his mind. 
“I don't have to be that mean.” He said snarkily. 
Titan I hate this guy already…
“No one will have to be a sailor or get arrested. If one of you follows those Selkidomus tracks and slays the beast.” He ordered. “Here! I'll help!” Then the guard materialized a sword into the air, dropping it in front of them. 
What is it with the coven and slaying innocent creatures?!
Luz looked at the sword, and back up to the guard, pleading with her eyes. 
The guard rubbed his mask. “Ugh, you're making this difficult. Go, or I drown the bird.” He said, revealing King behind the cage he had. Thankfully, the demon appeared unharmed. 
Eda looked at Luz, seeing her conflicted face. If she had Owlbert with her right now, she would've grabbed her kid and tried to make a break for it, as if the ordeal never happened. 
But of course it wasn't that simple. 
Luz sighed. “Fine.” And to Eda’s alarm, she picked up the sword. “I'll do it.” She said in a low voice. 
Eda reached out an arm as Luz headed towards the cave. 
“Luz, wait!” She pleaded. There had to be a way out of this other than killing! “Luz!” 
On the way to the area where the Selkidomus was, Eda was trying to disuade Luz from doing what she was about to do. 
“Luz, don't hurt the Selkidomus. We can find another way out of this.” She said. 
But Luz kept walking. “You heard what he said, Eda. If you and King want to be free…” Luz stopped in front of a ditch and jumped onto a shipwreck. “Then I have to do this alone.”
The witch found it hard to ignore that Luz excluded herself from the “being free” deal, and her heart started pounding at the sight of Luz being above a ditch again. She didn't like where this was going at all. 
“What's this ‘alone’ business? Don't you remember?” Eda tried reminding her. “Us weirdos have to-” 
“What? Stick together?” Luz snapped. She looked at Eda, forlorn, almost startling her with the sadness in her face. “Because you stuck with me you lost your magic! You almost got turned to stone, and now you can't even afford your apple blood because you're worried about what I need to eat!” She rambled, looking down sadly. 
Eda stared at Luz, her heart breaking for the girl. She knew Luz was going through some things, but she didn't think it was this bad. Only a week and a half of them being together again, and Luz still blames herself. She should've paid more attention in the last week. Eda tried to find the words to tell Luz that no, this isn't your fault, you can come down from there and we can find a different way to go back home together. 
But before Eda could come up with an answer, the Selkidomus below growled, meaning it was awake. Luz kept her balance on the beam, then looked away from Eda.
“It's my fault all this happened, that's why I've got to do this alone.” She looked back at Eda, smiling. “I'll make it all up to you, Eda the Owl Lady. I promise.” 
Then, to Eda’s horror, Luz let herself fall off the beam and down the ditch. She couldn't help reaching her hands out, as if she could actually catch her. Her heart dropped to her stomach and she couldn't help crying out Luz’s name. 
No, no, NO-
Suddenly, Eda was reminded of that day on the bridge. Her sister tossing Luz aside like a ragdoll, into the ditch, that terrified little girl screaming as she fell, onto the spikes- 
“LUZ!” 
Eda shook herself out of her stupor, reminding herself of what to do. 
Thinking quickly, Eda grabbed a nearby vibe and lept down the ditch to find her kid.
She just got her back, and she'll be damned if she lost her again.
Soon enough, the witch found a safe ledge to stand on and Eda spotted the kid on the ground, preparing to throw herself at the Selkidomus, which was already defending itself. Eda spotted a nearby branch, thick and strong enough to use. She tugged on it, preparing to swing. 
Just as Luz had catapaulted herself in the air with her ice glyph, Eda swung in just in time. She wrapped an arm around Luz, holding her as tight and as close as possible under one arm so she wouldn't be dropped. 
I gotcha, kiddo!
Thankfully they were able to avoid the creature’s jaws and landed safely in a bush. 
As soon as they landed, Luz had tumbled out of Eda’s arms and clumsily sat back up. Eda recovered as well, turning back to the kid. 
Eda pointed a finger at Luz, and she stared back with wide eyes, startled. 
“You think throwing your life away is gonna help me? Well it won't.” Eda said firmly. She needed Luz to hear this. Luz deserved to hear this. 
“You helped me find King’s crown when you barely knew me, you saved me from turning to stone,” Eda averted her eyes from the kid, starting to feel emotional. “And you even got me talking to my sister again.” She looked back up, seeing that Luz was still listening. 
“So…unfortunately for you…my life is pretty great because I'm friends with Luz the Human.” Eda finished, her voice wavering. 
That seemed to be exactly what Luz needed, because now she was looking at her with glistening eyes and a trembling lip.
Eda blinked her eyes hard to keep the tears at bay, and her face got serious again.
Focus, Eda, we need to get out of here.
“Now,” She snapped out of it and grabbed Luz’s face, startling her. “Your guilt-ridden brain is clouding your judgement.” She said, poking Luz’s forehead. “There’s gotta be a way out of this where no one has to get hurt.” Eda let go of the kid’s cheeks and looked around the cave.
Just then, a small noise made them turn around. A baby Selkidomus had approached them. Luz looked at it for a moment, putting the pieces together in her head, then turned back to Eda.
“Eda,” the witch looked at Luz, willing to hear any plan she had right now.
“Do you wanna learn your first glyph?” She asked with a determined smile, holding up one of her light glyphs.
Not for the first time, Eda marvels at just how bright her kid is.
~
Later, Luz and Eda had managed to create a fake Selkidomus out of plant glyphs and made it work by using the light glyphs to fool the Golden Guard into thinking they were fighting the real thing.
The power of theatrics and a bright young mind. 
Moments later, Eda had gotten up and used whatever paper was left to draw more light glyphs on the ground. 
She still remembers the first time Luz casted these glyphs. They were so beautiful, and Eda always found them comforting. And now she gets to draw them herself. It only took a week for her to finally try it, but it was worth it.
It wasn’t long before Luz returned with King safely out of the cage. When she approached, Eda took a ball of light in her hands and glanced up at Luz.
“My first glyph! Did I do good?” If she was being completely honest, Eda felt like a giddy little kid again, learning new magic and sharing it with the people she loved. It felt wonderful.
Luz observed her with a bright smile. “Yeah! You did great!”
The baby Selkidomus returned, quickly worming its way toward Luz, nuzzling her, which delighted the kid as she was hugging back.
“Baby, awwwww!” She cooed, and a part of Eda was relieved to see the Luz she knew begin to return.
“Wait- what is that?!” King asked, alarmed.
“Don’t worry, King, once the mother saw we weren’t a threat to her baby she calmed down.” Eda reassured, patting the baby gently. Then she turned to the mother behind them. “This area is dangerous,” she explained. “You need to move further out, into the sea.” 
Understanding Eda’s warning, the creature nodded. Then something strange happened. It started...gagging. Until it puked up a pile of some gold goop, which Eda recognized to be Selkie Gris.
Mother of Titan, they hit the jackpot!
Luz stared at it with disgust for a few seconds before Eda excitedly pulled her close in a side hug. 
“Hot dang! It gave you the treasure of the sea!” Eda said in excitement, holding her kid with one arm and holding the other arm out to present their prize.
“Gold? ...Tuna?” Luz said in confusion.
“It’s Selkie Gris!” Eda let Luz go and scooped some of the stuff into her hands. “People pay big money for it at the night market!” Seeing Luz’s still confused face, she got an idea. The witch smushed it in her hands and took the opportunity to rub it on the kid’s face. “Ahh, feeelll the money, Luz! Luxuriate it!” She teased. 
“No, no, Eda! Ahh!” As expected, Luz protested and squirmed against the touch, but she was starting to laugh, which is what Eda wanted. 
Eda smirked, taking hold of the kid’s hands as she tried and failed to get away. “What? Don’t like to luxuriate? There’s a whole pile of luxury right here!” Then she grabbed Luz’s arms and swiftly tossed her into the pile, earning a yelp from the girl. “Move over!” Eda said, following suit and landing face down.
“Edaa!” Luz protested, but she broke out into laughter with Eda. It filled the witch with much joy to see Luz laughing and smiling again. She deserved it after the rough day they just had.
With that being said, after a minute, Eda got up and decided it was finally time to head home. Maintaining her balance, she reached her hands out to Luz and hoisted her up, keeping a tight grip on her so she wouldn’t fall. 
Thankfully, the Golden Guard didn’t obliterate her boat, so they had a way back home. Eda used an extra sack she had to bag the Selkie gris so they could take it home. It was significantly lighter than the snails. They would have to make a trip the night market to trade it off soon. Something had finally gone right today!
“You ready to go home?” Eda asked, turning to Luz, who was settled behind her with King on her shoulder. 
“Aye-aye, captain!” Luz said, saluting. 
That’s the Luz I know and love, Eda thought. “Alrighty then, brace yourself!” and she, King and Luz started their way back home.
~
It was seven in the evening, and the trio had made it home. After Lilith had presented her scrying potion, Eda had gone off to order their takeout, leaving Luz alone with her thoughts in the hallway.
...Something Luz really didn’t like doing. 
A lot had happened all in one night, from her and Eda getting ambushed by the Golden Guard, to her being forced to go slay the Selkidomus (knowing she was about to take away a baby’s mother back there made it worse to think about), to Eda talking her out of it. 
In all honesty, Luz felt like she needed to hear those words. Eda was right. She had done so much to help her, and she did seem happier whenever Luz was around. Maybe she wasn’t a burden after all…
She was snapped out of her thoughts when the witch in question came back around the corner. 
“Well, I’m tired. How about you, kid?” She said, yawning. 
“Hungry.” Luz said simply. 
“Don’t worry, food should be here in about a half hour.” Eda replied, ruffling Luz’s hair. Then she noticed a familiar look on her face. “You okay, kid?”
Luz shook herself out of her thoughts. “Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?”
Eda put a hand on her shoulder. “I know that look. You’re deep in thought.” Luz looked down at the floor. “Do you wanna talk about it? You know you don’t have to if you don’t want to.” The witch knew it would only make it worse for the girl to keep things inside. And after what happened in the cave, she wanted to know how it got this bad.
Luz supposes it wouldn’t hurt. She trusted Eda. “Okay…” she gave a small nod. 
Eda slung an arm around her shoulders. ‘’C’mon, walk with me.” and the two walked slowly down the hallway. 
“A lot just happened tonight.”
“That’s for sure.” Eda agreed. “I- you really scared me back there, you know?” she said, hand tightening on Luz’s shoulder.
“I’m sorry.” Luz answered. The last thing she wanted to do was hurt Eda. She supposes she doesn’t always consider that endangering herself contributes to that. “I just...wanted to make things right.”
They stopped walking as Eda turned to her. “You don’t owe me anything, Luz. You know that, right?” She said, meeting the girl’s eyes.
“But-”
“No buts. I promise I’m not angry, kiddo, I just hate seeing you like this.” She sighs. “I wish you would’ve told me before things got this far.” Noticing Luz starting to sag, she guides them to sit against the wall so they can talk more comfortably.
“I promise I’m not angry.” Eda repeats softly. “You're just a kid, you really shouldn't have to carry shit like this…”
Luz takes a breath and continues to speak. “I hated seeing you and Lilith have such a hard time with money. And most of the money that we did have was spent on me. I-I thought that if I got a big enough bounty, you wouldn’t have to worry so much about me anymore, and I wouldn’t be such a burden to you.” Luz could feel tears starting to build up. “But I guess I messed that up.”
“Hey.” Eda said, tilting Luz’s wobbling chin up. “Listen to me. Don’t you think like that.” She moved the hand to Luz’s shoulder. “You were never a burden, okay?”
Luz looked at her with teary eyes. “Really?”
“Really. A burden is an unwanted responsibility. But you?” Eda used her thumb to gently wipe away some of Luz’s tears. “I’ll never get tired of you. You're the best thing that's happened to me in a long time. I want to take care of you. You mean so much to me.” 
At this point, Luz is smiling wide with a few stray tears rolling down her face. “Do you really mean that?”
Eda nodded, cupping her cheek. “Of course I do. I told you a week ago that I don’t regret anything. You’re a wonderful kid, Luz. Anyone that calls you otherwise is stupid.” Luz giggles at that. “I’ll pummel anyone that says otherwise.”
Luz hesitantly moves in for a hug, and Eda draws her in easily. “You promise?”
Eda nods, pulling Luz closer. “I promise. It’s okay.” She begins to stroke Luz’s hair a little bit. Then another thought intrudes her mind. Her grip tightens around her kid once more. 
“You really scared me when you jumped down there…” Eda spoke. “I thought I was gonna lose you again.” The memory of Luz falling towards those spikes is never going away anytime soon. The witch felt like her nightmares were coming true. No way in hell does she ever want to go through that again.
Luz nuzzles closer. “I know… I promise I’ll be more careful.” She isn’t sure it’s a promise she can keep, but she’s willing to try. A part of Luz notices that Eda’s becoming more and more casual with touch, but chooses to ignore it.
“Good.” Eda pulled away from the embrace, still holding Luz by her shoulders. “Remember that, okay? I don’t want you talking to yourself like this.” She said, tapping the kid’s head.
“I will.” Before they got up, Luz moved in for one more hug. “I love you, Eda.” Not for the first time, Luz was grateful that Eda made no small effort to just be there for her. She underestimated her.
Eda hugged her back. “I love you too, Luz.”
Then, a knock at the door, and a screech from Hooty.
“Looks like the food’s here! You still hungry, kiddo?” 
“Oh my god, yes.” Luz groaned. 
Eda laughed, stood up, and offered a hand to help Luz up. Unfortunately, the girl stood up too quickly, causing her to stumble a bit.
“Ahhh, head rush, head rush!” Luz murmured. She held onto Eda’s hand.
“You good?” Eda asked with a laugh.
“Yup, yup, I’m good. Just stood up too fast.”
“Wanna race to the kitchen?” Eda offered. “I’ll give you a head start.”
Luz chuckled. “You’re on!”
Yeah, Eda thought, looking fondly at her kid. I still don’t regret anything.
And Luz looked at Eda, seeing her heterochromatic eyes. True, the witch might've lost all her powers, but she didn't lose her love.
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crispyjenkins · 4 years
Note
fic with ahsoka as Obi-Wans Padawan? Maybe some angsty jangobi? (Used to be together but broke up and now they pine from afar™️)
(i’m devastated that i don’t get to write ahsoka much, especially as obi’s padawan, so that an anon would come into my inbox.... and request jangobi on top of it..... seriously, though, thank you! can’t say i wasn’t inspired by @autumnchild22’s Kenobi Tano AU, but this doesn’t share almost anything with their take of events (ノ*´◡`) i’m flattered y’all thought i could do something of theirs justice lmao
i have written entirely too much backstory for this one, i think my brainstorming ended up longer than the actual fic so like. rip. 
support artists and writers by reblogging, message me for more info if this confuses you!)
  It surprises everyone except Obi-Wan that not only does Jango join the clones on the front lines, but he does so as the ARC troopers’ medic. That the son of the Mand’alor murdered by the Jedi would allow his kid to be apprenticed by a lifetime Council member is already hard enough for the galaxy at large to swallow; believing that the man who had at once been the most feared bounty hunter in the Outer Rim wouldn’t even ask for a command position? Impossible.
  Obi-Wan knows better. Just as Obi-Wan had picked up Soresu because he could not protect his master on Naboo, Jango had learned to put people back together because he could not save his buir on Korda 6. 
  Besides, Obi-Wan thinks Mace is a wonderful match for little Boba, even though he’s joining the Jedi older than even Anakin had been. Knowing Mace was among the Jedi to liberate the spice freighter Jango had been sold to, and that he had continued to check in on Jango for years after he got his armor back, Obi-Wan actually finds it rather silly that others on the Council had thought Jango would trust Boba to anyone else. 
  Which does leave Obi-Wan in quite the predicament, when less than a year after Anakin's knighting, Mace sends him a new padawan in the middle of a campaign. 
  Ahsoka smiles with all canines, and calls Anakin Skyguy, and has to be tricked into wearing more armor because, according to Cody, she is "not to take the General's lack of self-preservation as the status quo, nor as the basis for field safety." Which, rude, Obi-Wan wears plenty of armor when the situation calls for it; he simply doesn't find many situations where plasteel has kept his men or the Jedi from dying horribly.
  Letting Ahsoka gallivant around a battlefield in a tube-top without even a cloak, however, is out of the question, and Obi-Wan thinks Waxer does a brilliant job in sizing down the armor to fit their collective padawan over the next few months. Force, had Anakin really been younger than she when he first started taking him on missions?
  "Master?"
  Obi-Wan blinks, and smiles down at Ahsoka standing next to him, his apprentice looking quite dashing in the orange paint of the 212th. "Sorry, my dear, what were you saying?"
  She shrugs, eyeing him suspiciously. "'Was just asking if we would be working with the ARC troopers on Kiros; Captain Fordo said he would show me how to use a blaster rifle next time they were on the Negotiator."
  The Kaminoans intended for a few ARC troopers to be sent with each battalion, but it had quickly become clear that Jango had not trained them that way. Instead, he had raised and created a strike team so efficient, it would have been a waste to separate them; Obi-Wan knows Jango had hand-picked them from cadets, had searched for a spark in them that the Kaminoans hadn't already snuffed out completely. Jango had been like that once, too.
  "I would be surprised if we didn't," Obi-Wan decides on, turning back to observe the 212th loading into the Negotiator, and he would be, because the ARCs are often deployed with Obi-Wan’s men, have been since the Battle of Kamino. "But I have not heard anything from Master Shaak Ti, nor Captain Fordo as of yet."
  Ahsoka scrunches up her face into a pout, an amusing show of her age that she usually does not allow. "We'll probably get halfway through the mission and they'll just show up."
  Obi-Wan chuckles. “Hm, yes, probably,” he agrees, starting to make his way down to the hangar to join his men with Ahsoka trotting along behind, “but perhaps I can convince Captain Fordo not to surprise us too badly this time.”
-
  When the ARC troopers finally storm the Kadavo Processing Facility with Anakin and the Jedi on their heels, the warden Agruss is already dead.
  The sudden swell of Jedi presence is nearly blinding after a month of helplessness, but Obi-Wan can't tap out, not yet. Rex, satisfied and vindictive and relieved, sways dangerously and automatically reaches out to Obi-Wan to steady himself. 
  That Rex trusts him enough to not even think about rank before asking for help warms Obi-Wan in ways he doesn't yet have the words for — he wraps Rex's arm around his shoulders and takes half his weight happily.
  "Thank you," Obi-Wan finds himself murmuring as he helps Rex towards the doors, and only smiles at the captain's bemused expression. 
  "Whatever for, General?" he asks, even as he looks back over their shoulders across the room, to Agruss impaled to his chair with the electrostaff still sparking. Then he returns Obi-Wan’s smile, shaking his head. "That's not very Jedi-like of you, sir."
  "I'm afraid I haven't felt much a Jedi since Kiros, my dear." Which is perhaps too honest to allow himself before he's had a proper meal and a full night's rest, but if there is anyone who will understand, it is the man that lived it with him. "We could wait up here for Anakin to find us, but it will likely be a while before they can spare him to start looking; do you think you can keep your feet long enough for us to reach the ground floor?"
  Rex snorts and gives a vague wave of his free hand towards the elevators. "Well, I'm certainly not going to wait up here like some damsel, sir, and General Skywalker would kill me if I let you wander around on your own."
  "Well!" Obi-Wan laughs, for the first time in weeks, and hitches Rex up to get a better grip on his waist. "In that case, we really should not keep him waiting."
  They somehow time it perfectly for what the 187th and the 501st to have just finished rounding up the slavers in the courtyard when he and Rex hobble out of a side door of the warden's tower. Lieutenant Law oversees the Togrutas' move to Mace’s flagship Solace, and Obi-Wan easily picks him and Boba out from the crowd, standing at the base of the loading ramp and speaking with the Kiros colony's governor. Anakin is nowhere to be seen, but Obi-Wan doesn't get the chance to keep looking before Kix spots them from his place by the medical frigate; a shout passes over the nearby clones like a wave, until Kix and an ARC trooper break away to (gently) manhandle both him and Rex to the frigate. 
  The 187th's medic, Oro, is already on board seeing to the Togrutas too injured to wait for triage on the Solace, snapping a distracted salute that Obi-Wan quickly waves off as he helps heft Rex onto a hoverbed. He fully intends to duck back out and check in with Mace, though things seem well in hand without him, but the ARC with Kix takes off his helmet and glares, until Obi-Wan meekly shuffles to the next hoverbed over.
  He could never refuse Jango, after all. 
  "You repainted your armor," he says conversationally, as Jango pulls a scanner from the bandoleer around his chest and has Obi-Wan roll up his right sleeve. 
  "'Lost the last set to a sarlacc before our deployment to Kiros," Jango snorts, Concord Dawn accent stronger than any of his clones. "Though it looks like your mission had its fair share of excitement." Running the scanner over the electrical burns on Obi-Wan’s arm, Jango raises an eyebrow at the dried blood on the shoulder of his tunics; Obi-Wan honestly doesn't remember if it's his or not.
  And he can only smile at Jango, because even with a decade and a war between them, the corner of Jango's mouth still twitches when he's stressed. "Well, it certainly wasn't boring, my dear," Obi-Wan says, opening the neck of his tunic enough for Jango to stick him with a hypospray that hopefully won't make him too high. "And I can't say I'm looking forward to what is surely going to be a long dip in the bacta tank."
  He gets a laugh for that, and can't think of the last time they had done more than make eye contact from opposite sides of a ship. Perhaps it had been Kamino, when Taun We had first sent for the Jedi to meet the army created for them. 
  Obi-Wan had rather thought Jango dead until then, when he had disappeared from the galaxy abruptly as if he had never lived in it at all. For a time, Obi-Wan believed he had just gotten cold feet, that finally meeting Anakin made it all a little too personal too quickly, but then even Mace could not get a hold of him and no one had seen a Mandalorian bounty hunter in months.
  Their... conversation, Jango's stilted explanations of his absence and of how little he actually knew about the purpose for the clones he helped create, left far too much unsaid, but then Obi-Wan had been sent to Geonosis and, well. It's been nearly two years now, and Obi-Wan isn't sure if he's even seen Jango without his helmet since then. 
  His eyes flick over Obi-Wan’s face, the left side of his lips twitching as if knowing exactly what Obi-Wan is thinking — and he might not put it past him. 
  "Where are Anakin and Ahsoka?" Obi-Wan hears himself ask, when the silence grows heavy with those unsaid words. And he really would like to check in with his padawan, he can't imagine her last month has been a picnic either.
  Jango sticks him with another stim before answering, "Mace sent Skywalker to make sure no slave is missed, and no slaver isn't arrested. As for your new foundling..." That little smile comes back, as Jango nods out the back of the frigate to where someone is cutting a line through the clones guarding their new prisoners. 
  "Oh dear," Obi-Wan mumbles, barely having time to brace himself before Ahsoka is launching herself at him, and all he can think is how relieved he is to see her out of her slave disguise. Jango steps cleanly out of the way to let Ahsoka smother herself in Obi-Wan’s chest, though it doesn’t stop him from starting to prep bacta patches to tide him over until they can get to the Negotiator’s medbay.
  “Hello, little one,” Obi-Wan murmurs, carefully loosening the tight net of his shields for the first time since Zygerria and letting Ahsoka’s presence flood his mind. 
  “It’s good to see you, Master ‘Nobi,” she says into his tunics, and her voice does not waver at all.
  He manages a chuckle, though it does not hold nearly as well as Ahsoka’s, as he feels himself finally relax. Anakin, of course, senses the both of them immediately and prods at their minds, but neither Obi-Wan nor his padawan acknowledge him. “I take it the Queen is dead?”
  Ahsoka sighs and pulls back enough to nod. “Count Dooku was there, Skyguy barely got us all out.”
  “That was a week ago,” Jango adds, not looking up from the datapad he’s logging Obi-Wan’s injuries into. “Even with the Queen giving us the location of the Processing Facility, we had to wait for the 187th to catch up.”
  Running his palm from the top of her head down her hind lek, Ahsoka melts back against him with a Togruta churr he rarely has the pleasure of hearing from her. “Hm, and I imagine Boba was thrilled to work with the ARC troopers.”
  Jango snorts, because they both know Boba is thirteen and his rebellious stage where he wants nothing to do with his father for fear of losing his independence. “Originally, the 104th was the closest battalion, but were held up in their own campaign. ‘Honestly didn’t think we could keep Skywalker from rushing in anyways.”
  And Obi-Wan has to wince at that, because no matter what he does, he can’t seem to find a way to teach Anakin about attachment in words he understands; truthfully, Obi-Wan wouldn’t have had him knighted until he had at least attempted to master that part of his mind, but, well, the War had different opinions.
  “I’m actually just surprised he didn’t try to fight Dooku,” Ahsoka admits, finally releasing Obi-Wan only to hop up on the hoverbed next to him. Jango immediately pulls Obi-Wan’s bare arm back to himself to start slapping the bacta patches over the worst of his burns. “Master Windu had a talk with him, though, I think it was good for him.”
  “I’d like to see that!” Jango barks, only half sarcastically: he knows better than most, the sorts of things Mace Windu can talk someone out of, and if it worked for one ex-slave, why shouldn’t it work on another?
  Ah, perhaps that shared history should not have slipped Obi-Wan’s mind, not here with thousands of freed slaves needing aid for injuries Jango is intimately familiar with.
  “And are you alright?” he asks before he can talk himself out of it, as Jango is cutting his sleeve further back. His brow ticks back up, clearly bewildered by what Obi-Wan could be referring to, but it’s Ahsoka that leans around Obi-Wan to sniff triumphantly up at Jango.
  “I told you he still likes you,” she says, and Jango’s hand freezes on Obi-Wan’s wrist.
  Obi-Wan sighs. “Ahsoka.”
  But instead of denying that he might have actually had such a conversation with Obi-Wan’s padawan, Jango coughs on a laugh. “So you did, edee. To be fair, I did not think that was the issue.”
  Ahsoka rolls her eyes, leaning back into Obi-Wan’s side as he automatically raises his arm to accommodate her. “He thinks he lost his chance, Master ‘Nobi,” she tells him. “Even Cody thinks he’s full of banthashit.”
  Where Obi-Wan feels a little shell-shocked by the turn in conversation, Jango simply keeps that tiny smile — even if it looks bittersweet and self-deprecating now. “Your foundling has spent the last week talking me in circles about this, I almost think she’s as stubborn as you.”
  “I’ll take that as a compliment, I think,” Obi-Wan returns, sarcasm an automatic, subconscious response. 
  “I wouldn’t need to talk you in circles if you two just talked to each other.”
  Shaking his head in bemusement, Obi-Wan gently fixes Ahsoka’s slika beads to lay properly around her montrals. “I’m afraid there’s quite a lot of history there, little one; most of which I’m sure Jango did not actually share with you.”
  She wrinkles her nose. “No, he refuses to tell me anything except that you met on a mission. And that he saved your ass from Jabba the Hutt.”
  Obi-Wan snaps his eyes to Jango, who looks absolutely anywhere but at him. “Is that how you remember it going, my dear?”
  “Could we do this later?”
  “Because if I recall correctly, and I do, this is not the first time you’ve lost your armor to a sarlacc.”
  Jango looks to the ceiling for patience. 
-
Mando'a: buir — “parent”, gender neutral  Mand’alor — “Sole ruler”, contended ruler of Mandalore. edee — “teeth”, “jaws”, used here as an affectionate name for Ahsoka. because she teeth.
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ssa-sugar-tits · 4 years
Text
queen of hearts // chapter eight
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summary : y/n y/l/n was crushed when she found out about maeve donovan. heartbroken, she left her entire life behind. what happens when she becomes the most prolific serial killer the bau has ever seen?
prologue + series masterlist & taglist
content warnings : swearing, death penalty mention, angst, sexual implications
a/n : reader is a psychotic murderer. this is purely a work of fiction and if you or someone you know are experiencing homidical urges, seek professional help immediately.
-
You'd accepted that you were going to die. You'd made peace with the way things ended, with your decisions. The only way kept yourself sane in the cold cell was by remembering the good memories you had. Before Maeve. Before your first kill. You sang to yourself and longed for someone to be there but it didn't hurt anymore. No, you were at peace.
Then you were a week late and vomiting in your cell. Your head pounded and you were cramping up like fucking hell. Your cellmate, Diane, had been the first to consider the possibility.
"Y/N you've been here a few weeks."
Not glancing up from your journal, you responded.
"Yeah, what about it?"
"I'm gonna be straight with you. You fuck anyone before getting locked up?"
Barely giving the crude implication any thought, you'd scoffed and laughed loudly and instinctively but then froze and looked at her as the words came to life. It took that conversation for you to go to the infirmary and be tested. That morning, you found out that Article 6 of the 1966 International Covenant on Civil and Political Rights states: "Sentence of death shall not be carried out on pregnant women."
You weren't going to die. The nausea somehow worsened at the news. Were you relieved or more terrified than before? Hell if you know. There were countless whispers and phone calls made-- no doubt in your mind that some of them went to the BAU. Now what you don't know is what happens next. Where to go from here. Of course you won't be released or get to see Spence again. It's over for you. But you wonder what'll happen to your child when you're gone. Would Spencer want to keep the child? Or would they be thrown into the hell people call foster care? For once since being imprisoned, you're scared. So goddamn scared. The thoughts keep you awake at night, they make you shiver and gasp with panic. Every night your silent sobs help you fall asleep eventually.
-
"Y/L/N. You have a visitor."
Who the hell would come to visit you? Your family wants nothing to do with you anymore and the only friends you've ever really had are the team. Hesitantly, you walk with the guard who called you. Each step feels heavier and heavier. You're not sure if your heart sinks or flutters when you see who it is but something inside of you wants to spring out of your chest.
It's Spencer.
Sitting down, you don't say a word. Neither does he. You just stare into each other's cold, empty eyes.
"Orange looks good on you." He whispers and tries to smile but his face fails him. You want to speak but your throat goes dry and your facial expression go blank.
"Say something Y/N. Anything." His golden brown and now tearing eyes search yours for an answer but you still don't falter. You can't.
"We need to talk about it. We need to talk about what happens next."
He triggers the response you've been trying to muster up the words for. The guard's hand grips her gun when you spit out an angry, hurt yell.
"Are you serious? 'What happens next'? I have this baby and then they kill me, plain and simple. You're a fucking genius, you know that. Don't try to play these games with me Spence, I don't need you to make me think I have some kind of control here." Your voice goes low and raspy. "Because I don't."
It's a sad sight when his eyes fill with tears and yours threaten to do the same. No one speaks, you sit in god awful silence until the guard eventually escorts you back to your cell. Not daring to look back at him, you know eyes are still piercing you with their gaze but you still don't fucking look back. Head hitting the cell wall, you shrink down to the floor and start to cry. You feel small and helpless. They're heavy and loud sobs and Diane covers her ears with her pillow, groaning with irritation. The cries come endlessly and burn your throat and sting at your eyes until you finally somehow run out of tears and screams after what seems like hours. Your head lays on the hard floor and you start to think. Maybe it doesn't have to end here. Maybe you can make a plan. Sniffling roughly, you take a look at the night shift guard standing watch. If this doesn't work, then oh-fucking-well. At least you tried.
"You're new, aren't you?" His head spins to look down at you and you bite your lip, unsure of what you're doing. He's timid but trying to remain showing the 'tough guard' facade. "It gets lonely in my cell, you know."
His demeanor changes immediately. "You're in here because you're a monster. Now settle down inmate." Fuck. That didn't go like you'd hoped. He's right about you but it still parts you inside to hear the word monster being used to describe you. You tilt your head curiously when the profiler in you sees it. Something in his dark eyes looks at you with intrigue and... despite his harsh words maybe even desire.
"If I'm such a monster why are you looking at me like that?" Smirking and wiping a salty tear off your cheek, you know it could work. You bring your hands up to the cold bars and rest your forehead against them. "You wanna tell me your name?"
The guard looks both ways before finally giving in,
"Wilson. Bryce Wilson."
You breathe out your next words.
"Well Bryce Wilson. I want to show you something."
You think, no- you beg to yourself.
Please, let this work.
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7 MONTHS LATER - THIRD PERSON POV
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Emily clicks through channels hoping to find a late night movie to watch, she's exhausted from a report on a particularly difficult case.
No way. Not a chance.
Her hands fly to her mouth and she bites furiously with anxiety at her nails when she sees Y/N's face on the screen. The remote falls from her other hand as she settles on watching the news story.
"Breaking news: Y/N Y/L/N, also known as the Queen of Hearts killer escaped from prison this evening. We've been told a guard by the name of Bryce Wilson has been arrested as an alleged accomplice. Sources say the guard was romantically involved with the killer and that she is 7 months pregnant. What we don't know is if Wilson is the father, do we Debra?" The red-haired anchor-woman beside him takes over. "Speculation is certainly out there Jeff. Tune in at 8 for any updates, you're watching Channel 2 news." Panic stricken, she scurries to dial the team and sees missed calls and chaotic texts from just about every team member. The one that catches her eye is from Hotch.
"I know you've all become aware of the situation regarding Y/N. Briefing room in an hour."
And off she, and the rest of the frantic team, went.
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