#'cause it's actually a good reminder and hearing his voice saying it helps (save me matthew save me 😔)

[tinyclowndancer]

I think nervous happens before and after. It's about a control thing, right? You're not doing it so you're hoping like that but once you're on the ice… You know, we're here, that's like great! That's how The Game Awards was. Before I got to Los Angeles I was nervous, and then once I got there and I was with everybody and we were rehearsing together it was just fun, so all those nerves went away. But yeah, it's all about control - but nerves are good. Nerves make you prepare. Nervous gets you focused. You can use nerves as a positive thing, for sure. Don't be afraid of the nerves!

Behind the Voice: Alan Wake Voice Actor Matthew Porretta on Alan Wake 2 & Control (x)

[lostdreamr-blog1]

Party Gone Wrong

Summary: You went to a college party, but things started to take a turn. When your brother didn’t pick up, you called the next best person.

Pairings: Jake Seresin x Reader

Warnings: Mentions of drinking, mentions of anxiety, a few swear words.

Word count: 2.4k

Requested: Thank you Anon for this request! I hope this is what you were looking for!

A/N: Thank you all for stopping by and reading! My inbox is always open for requests, questions, or to simply say hello. For those who have sent requests, know that I am working hard on them! - C

Parties were something that was all too common at your university and the one thing you like to fit into your busy schedule when you could. Most of the time it was at some big house that belonged to a sorority or fraternity, but occasionally someone with money would throw one when their parents were gone for the weekend. Either way, it was normally a good time.

This particular night, the party was at some frat house which meant things could easily get out of hand but would most likely be a memorable night.

You enjoyed the carefree atmosphere as you closed your eyes and danced to the beat of the music. People were all around you, having the time of their lives, no one caring who was who and simply wanted to let loose. It was nights like these that reminded you how much you enjoyed coming out. You could put away all the stress of studying and the worries of life in general and get lost in the feeling of pure bliss.

Your body started to feel a bit lighter as you noticed the shots you took earlier were starting to take effect. Making sure you never over did it, you knew to wait a bit before taking another. Getting an earful from your brother about being too drunk in a public place wasn’t something you needed to hear. Bradley was always a bit overbearing.

Music blared through the house, and it was getting crowded to the point where it almost felt more like a club than someone’s home. You looked around for your friend you came with and saw she was tangled with some random guy in a corner. She did warn you before you both left that she was looking to forget her ex. And it seemed like she was exceeding her own expectations.

Your thoughts were interrupted as someone bumped into the back of you, causing you to be thrown forward. Between the shots and darkened room, you nearly crashed into the floor if it wasn’t for a pair of hands catching you.

In any other situation, you would be beyond thankful for whoever it was to stop your embarrassing fall. You had read enough romance novels that your mind naturally went into prince charming mode and wanted nothing more than to fall for the guy who saved you.

But one glance at your savior and all of that was thrown out the window. This guy had a smile that practically screamed “I’m your worst nightmare” and you knew you needed to get away from him fast. He helped you back onto your feet and you gave him the most forced smile you could come up with.

“Thanks for that. Was almost bad.” Maybe keeping your sentences short would get the message across that you weren’t looking to continue the conversation.

“No worries, beautiful. How about you thank me by coming to get a drink with me?” You’ve been around enough cocky guys to know which ones are all talk, and which ones would actually do something. And sadly, this one would no doubt take matters into his own hands if you pissed him off. Which is why you felt yourself starting to panic already.

It wasn’t lost on you that your one friend you came with was occupied and you had zero other people you could look to for help. This guy almost seemed to know this and took a step towards you, causing you to instinctively take one back.

“Thank you for the offer, but I have to get going. I could give you my number though for a rain check?” Your voice came out strong for how nervous you truly were, but it didn’t seem to fool the creep in front of you. He looked ready to pounce if you took another step away from him.

“What’s one drink?” One drink could be the beginning of the end for you. Who knew what this guy had in store, and you needed to leave. But how? Your mind wondered back to your brother and thought if you could hold out another 20 minutes, it would give Bradley enough time to get here.

So, going against every nerve in your body that told you to run, you gave him a flirty smile back. “You’re right. My paper can wait a little while longer. Would you be okay if I freshen up first?”

His smile sent shivers down your spine, but you knew you had your window to call your brother. “Yeah, babe. I’d be more than okay with that.” You sent him a small smile in thanks and made your way to the bathroom. One glance over your shoulder and you knew he was watching you like a hawk.

It took everything in your power to not breakdown as soon as you locked the door. Your anxiety was starting to reach new levels and it was taking a lot to keep a clear mind. Although, you took one look at the soap and almost washed your mouth out with how disgusted you felt talking to him like that.

You fumbled for your phone, hands shaking as you knew you didn’t have much time until he would come knocking. Dialing Bradley’s number gave you a small sliver of hope followed by a wave of frustration when you were met with his voicemail. As much as you wanted to throw your phone, another name popped into your head.

Two rings were all it took before the voice of God answered. “Seresin.”

“Jake.” You breathed his name out in relief, not thinking about how he would react on the other line.

“Y/N? What’s going on? Are you okay?” You were far from okay but freaking out over the phone wasn’t going to help either of you.

“I don’t have long, but I’m at this party about 20 minutes from base and this guy won’t leave me alone. He hasn’t done anything, but I just have this feeling. Can you come get me? My brother didn’t answer.” A knock on the door made you jump, and you called out that you would be done in a minute.

“Send me your location and I’ll be there as fast as I can. What are you doing right now?” You quickly typed out the address and said, “Hiding in the bathroom like a damn lunatic.”

You shook your head at yourself. What if you went back out there and caused a scene? That would get you out of his grasp and hopefully buy you enough time to get out of there. The only downfall was that your friend drove, and you had a long walk in the dark ahead of you.

He seemed to understand where your mind was going. “Listen to me. Go back out there, lead him over close to the front door, and do not leave that spot until I get there. And promise me you won’t drink anything he gives you.” You heard the start of an engine and knew he was already headed towards you.

“I promise.” You flushed the toilet and turned the sink on to signal to whoever was listening that you were almost done.

“I’ll be there in under 10. Call me if things change, but don’t do anything rash.” His voice was firm, but you heard the slight undertone of worry. Jake was always one to joke around and stay calm in even the most stressful situations. But hearing how he responded made the knot in your stomach worse. If he was worried, then maybe this situation was worse than you thought.

“Got it. Leaving the bathroom now.” And hung up. You took a few deep breaths before you stepped out of the safety of the small room. The perv was all of two steps away and on you in seconds.

“I figured I would save us some time and grab you a drink. I hope vodka is okay?” In any other situation, vodka would be fantastic. But the strong taste of liquor would mask anything that was put in the drink.

“It was almost like you knew what my favorite drink was.” The smile you gave was fake and anyone with two braincells would know that. But this guy seemed to only have one thing on his mind.

“Why don’t we head somewhere quieter and get to know each other more?” You took this as your chance to follow what Jake said and walked towards the front door. The only downside to this location, is that the stairs to the house where nearby and it would take some convincing to not have him force you up them.

His hand grabbed yours while you were walking, and you knew you would be having nightmares about his hands on you for a long while. Everything about him has ruined all desires to ever go to another party.

You stopped near the door, and you felt the tug of your hand as he tried to continue up the stairs. All thoughts of reason went out the door as you went to fight him back, but a hand on your shoulder made you freeze.

“Is there a reason your hand is on my girl?” The southern drawl you had come to love was music to your ears and you had all the faith he would get you out of there.

You felt your hand be released and you instinctively backed into Jake. He wrapped a protective arm around you and gave a small squeeze, letting you know he had you.

You could’ve kissed the ground he was walking on.

“Look man, she came on to me.” Before he could come up with anymore lies, Jake cut him off.

“It looked to me like you were about to drag her up those stairs. Now I need you to do us all a favor and get the fuck out of here before I do it for you.” You didn’t know if it was what he said or how he said it, but the creep in front of you tucked tail and ran.

You were frozen as you watched him leave, mind wondering what would’ve happened if Jake was a few minutes later.

“Sweetheart, let’s get you home.” He led you out the door and into his truck that was still running. You looked over to him in question and he gave a small smirk.

“Wasn’t trying to leave you with him longer than I had to.” You slid into the truck, and he closed the door behind you. It didn’t take long for him to pull away from the god-awful party and put some distance between you.

You leaned your head back on the seat and closed your eyes. Because of this, you missed the look of concern Jake had when he looked over at you. The strong, independent girl he had come to admire wasn’t here and he started to wonder just how bad tonight shook you up.

He nearly jumped when you spoke out. “Thank you for coming to get me.” You wanted to say more but the lump in your throat was getting hard to talk around. The last thing you wanted to do was breakdown in front of Jake, especially when nothing even happened. You would wait until you were in the safety of your own home before breaking those walls down.

His hand lightly grabbed yours and started rubbing circles on the back of it. “You know I would drop everything in a heartbeat for you. Even more so when your safety gets called into question.” You felt the first tear fall and knew it was only a matter of time before more of them followed.

“I just wanted to have a night off from everything. I didn’t mean for it to go this way.” His hand gave you a squeeze.

“How about this, next time you need a night off you let me know. I’ll do everything in my power to make sure you get that, and we won’t have to worry about this happening again.” You let out a sigh and looked over to him.

“You don’t have to do that. I know what you all do is a hell of a lot more stressful than my days.” He gave you one of his rare genuine smiles back.

“Sweetheart, my days would be a lot better if I got to see you at the end of them. So, if that means doing whatever you want to do in order to get that, I’d do anything.” You felt your cheeks heat up at his admission and thanked the lord it was dark in his truck. But before you could think too much more on it, the next sentence had your heart stopping.

“Your brother is going to be pissed when he hears what happened tonight.” The flirty Jake was gone as his voice became more serious. It seemed like he was running through the “what ifs” as well.

“We really don’t have to tell him.” It came out more of a plea than you wanted, but it didn’t help either way.

Jake gave you a look as if to say, “are you serious?” and shook his head. “He would not only kill me but you if he found out we kept this from him. Plus, I think he needs to know how badly things could’ve gone.”

You went back to leaning your head on the seat and closed your eyes. Images of your brother yelling at you crossed your mind and you kept trying to think of ways to avoid that.

“You’re the only family he has left. He’s going to want to know that way he can figure out how to not let this happen again.” And there went all arguments you had. You knew he was right, and you knew tonight wasn’t exactly your fault. But it still hurt to know you were going to cause your brother some sort of pain.

“I’ll be there with you if you want. Maybe take some of the heat off you.” You glanced back over to him and asked how he would do that. The answer he gave was simple.

“I’ll tell him it’ll never happen again because I don’t plan to let you out of my sight.” And sent you a wink.

A/N: Thoughts? Likes or dislikes? Thank you so so much for reading!!!

[lilis-doodle-dome]

I have so many questions about every dynamic you can think of for this au im so interested in hearing more about the tenma siblings (toya included) and nene + emu's relationship with tsukasa

im also interested to hear how the dynamic between ena and mafuyu, emu and mafuyu, + rui and mizuki changes.

There is not enough space in these charts for any real information aughh, sorry for the weird text sizing. Also I didn’t put that much effort into editing Kasa/Mafu in these images haha

But relationship charts between the group! Sorry it doesn’t answer every question, but hopefully it’s enough? Feel free to ask more if anything needs clarification!

Here’s a transcript:

Tsukasa- Emu: Always tries to make me smile, but should she really waste her energy on me?…Sometimes she reminds me of Saki when she was younger

Tsukasa-Nene: Stronger than she seems. The least chaotic of the others, when we’re together she doesn’t expect anything. It’s…nice, although it might not be good.

Tsukasa-Rui: Always has something new to try, but I think it’s more for his own curiosity than for my self discovery. He knows a lot, could be more helpful if he ever shared it.

Emu-Tsukasa: Someone important to me that I’ll help find the smile of, no matter what! You’re no oohm doom villain Tsukasa-kun!

Emu-Nene: The most wonderhoy singer! Thank you for helping me see what it means to be a leader, I promise to never lose sight of my troupe again.

Emu-Rui: He always has the best, most fun ideas! I really appreciate his support, we always do best with his directing!

Nene-Tsukasa: He can seem pretty intimidating, but he’s actually rather clueless. I hope he can figure himself out, just not at the expense of others.

Nene-Emu: You’ve grown into a person deserving of the title of leader and I’m grateful you brought us together. I know you’re determined about your goal, but don’t forget we’re here too.

Nene-Rui: I’ll get stronger, I won’t turn a blind eye to you ever again.

Rui-Tsukasa: He tests anything I ask of him without complaint, I wish I could say that was a good thing. Let’s keep using each other until we’ve found what we’re really looking for, okay?

Rui-Nene: I’m glad she’s standing up for herself more, but I hope she knows there’s nothing she needs to make up for. It’s just nice to perform with her again.

Rui-Emu: A truly admirable person, she’s dedicated herself wholeheartedly to other’s smiles. Your smile is something precious as well though, don’t forget that.

—

Mafuyu-Kanade: A musical genius to match my lyrical! Her soft mannerisms belie her unmatched stubbornness, she’ll ever so gently, tell me I’m doing too much, all while she neglects herself! How confounding!

Mafuyu-Ena: She reminds me of those small dogs that get a poor reputation for being aggressive, despite it being people ignoring their fear signals that cause those reactions. That being said, it’s rather entertaining how differently she responds to Kanade versus Mizuki.

Mafuyu-Mizuki: They’ve introduced me to many new styles I’ve never experienced before. It’s amazing how they can make the most intimidating outings seem approachable. I enjoy any and all time spent with them!

Kanade-Mafuyu: She can’t see how she’s hurting herself for the sake of others. I need to help her, someone who can actually save others- shouldn’t have to suffer for it.

Kanade-Ena: Her art is still filled with hurt, but I’m glad she’s found some peace in our group. If only I could do more for her…

Kanade-Mizuki: They always have the frankest opinions of everyone else and seem to speak their mind freely, yet rarely say anything about themself. Their perspective is always appreciated though.

Ena-Mafuyu: Aren’t the big headed types supposed to not actually be good at everything? How is that fair at all, and she’s even got the nerve to be a nice person! I’ll show her-

Ena-Kanade: She’s wonderful. The soft, patient voice-of-reason needed to reign in the group, listening to her music is like a miracle cure for bad days.

Ena-Mizuki: They’re an insistent pest, that won’t leave me in peace. I guess I don’t hate the company though and they are good at putting together outfits for photos.

Mizuki-Mafuyu: A willing dress-up doll, she’s pretty enough to be one too! Kinda reminds me of an old friend with how many questions she asks about everything, guess geniuses have that in common.

Mizuki-Kanade: Always makes sure everyone feels comfortable and safe. It’s really nice to have a space I won’t be judged…

Mizuki-Ena: She’s way too funny not to tease, but she’s just as capable as the rest of the group. It’s kinda scary how easy she is to talk to, wouldn’t want to say anything I regret.

[monty-glasses-roxy]

Freaking HAUNTED by the scenario of Cassie falling for the Mimic's act in the elevator and she comes back from it so, so, SO freaking scared but also so so SO freaking biased and spiteful and ANGRY she tries getting back at Gregory in the way that would hurt him even more than just 'paying in the same coin', by taking away from him exactly what he loves the most by trying to get Freddy destroyed. 💀 (definitely not a route I think Cassie would truly dive into but boy ain't it an interesting one none the less! 👀)

It also doubles as a way to free Roxy and the others from Freddy as well!! Two birds one stone!!

However... I've never heard the saying 'paying in the same coin' so I'm not entirely sure what it means, but I can take a pretty good guess. Not to be contrarian but what makes you think destroying Freddy wouldn't be doing the same thing Gregory did? He destroyed Roxy, Chica and Monty, and it was his voice telling him to deactivate Roxy for good to come and save him. After shutting her down, and her coming back to throw herself at Mimic for Cassie, Gregory tried to make it all for nothing by dropping her.

All of Roxy's damage falls on his shoulders, both before and after Cassie came into the picture. He didn't even care, did he? And neither did Freddy so really, this is the best vengeance she can hope for. She deals with the animatronic that Roxy keeps saying she'll kill if she ever sees him again, and hits Gregory where it really fucking hurts. Two revenge plans one stone!

And you're so right, Cassie would probably not go down that road... But ya know she might at least be a little tempted given Roxy's aggression over it. She keeps giving her ideas damn it she doesn't want them!!! Roxy can take them and do whatever she wants with them, Cassie doesn't wanna do it!!! And it works out cause Roxy doesn't have the fucking balls to go all the way with a murder plan anyway so no one gets hurt!!!

I guess that's a lose lose scenario ngl though...

This reminds me of a scenario I had the idea for a little bit ago when we were last talking about this stuff! (That got a bit long here so I'll add a read more for convenience)

The idea is that Vanessa, Gregory and Freddy return as quick as they can to try and save Cassie and instead find Roxy, once again guarding the door, Mini swarm in the shadows around them. She's obviously more damaged than before so it's a bit more difficult, but she's doing her best not to fall off the barriers she's stood on over the door and I've just had the idea of Minis holding onto her in the dark like training wheels. Aside from them, she's completely alone.

Vanessa talking is a shock to her and she's beyond happy to hear she's okay and most importantly, was freed. Surprisingly touched by her running to help her too... Just fucking snaps at Gregory and Freddy to shut the fuck up whenever they say anything cause she doesn't give a flying shit what they have to say. Vanessa hurries though, asking how she got away from that thing down there and tells her that Gregory's friend Cassie was down there too, what happened??

Yeah uh. Roxy says nothing for a while and Gregory gets impatient and tries to run at the door. The Minis grab him and the swarm just kinda take him away, literally up the fucking wall and take some pictures with an old Fazcam so Roxy can see it later lmao she's actually devastated she can't see this happening right now. Anyway, Roxy's like "what do you THINK happened?" and since she won't say anything else, they naturally, assume the fucking worst. She doesn't correct them or say another word. Just tells Freddy and Gregory that they've done enough fucking damage and to get out before she throws them out...

Oh yeah Gregory is fucking pissed. Why didn't she save her?! Why is Roxy out here when Cassie isn't?! What kind of useless animatronic is she that she couldn't save one kid?! What, is she only good at killing kids?! Is that it?! He's so fucking mad and Roxy just lets him rant and rave, the Minis stopping him for her every time he makes a run at the door until Freddy takes him away. He says he's disappointed in her, but that he's not surprised and that makes her seethe but she doesn't say anything until she hears Vanessa leaving. She stops her and when they're alone, she tells Vanessa the truth.

Cassie is in bad shape. Mimic is dead and they barely made it out, but her dad took her to hospital a little before they got here. Vanessa - who was in tears already - is so fucking relieved, but then asks why Roxy didn't say anything earlier. She tells her the truth as she knows it. That Cassie was here trying to save him. That Mimic lured her here as him, and at the end, Gregory said he couldn't risk being followed, and dropped the fucking lift with Cassie in it.

Now that doesn't make sense to Vanessa. She may not have been there for that last bit but they didn't rush all the way over here for nothing. Roxy can't exactly answer why he'd want to come back here, but she reminds her what he and Freddy did to all of them and points out that this would hardly have been out of the ordinary for him.

And so, you now have a situation where Vanessa doesn't know what to believe. She knows Roxy wouldn't lie about something like that and even if she did, she's a fucking awful liar. But she's clearly angry enough to let him think Cassie is dead and not give a shit... And she says it's to make sure he doesn't try it again so she's also asking Vanessa not to say a word. She can't do that! She can't just let a kid think his friend is dead because of him! ... But she's right in thinking this may not be completely out of the ordinary for him... But he wouldn't do that to someone he would run to the rescue of, right?? Gregory wouldn't do that, she knows him well enough to know that now!!

You see what's happened here? Now Vanessa is in the middle. If she doesn't say a word, Gregory will forever think Cassie got killed trying to save him. If she tells him and it turns out Roxy is right, then what if he tries again?

I feel she'd tell him, but no matter what, Roxy just straight up telling the truth to Vanessa, his current guardian, and not to him would cause so much pain. He could have been there screaming at her and she didn't say a fucking word because in her mind, this is nothing compared to what he's put all of them and Cassie through. And what happens if she does die in hospital?? What then?? She can't lie and say she's fine when she's not anyway!! She doesn't know shit!!

But ya get me with this? It's emotional revenge enacted at the end of Roxy's very long day in the pizzeria graveyard. Minimal effort required, with Vanessa unfortunately in the middle, but Vanessa is always welcome here. Roxy won't blame her for whatever she chooses to do, because at the end of the day, Roxy's done her job. Whether Gregory or Freddy believes it or not, she did her job.

She's really fucking glad she couldn't see his reaction though, she wouldn't have been able to keep her mouth shut if she had. Like most of the others, she can't bare to see a kid in genuine pain and she knows damn well how much her silence caused...

But yeah, you just got me thinking about that again. It's a spur of the moment thing for Roxy, inspired partly by the fact she's not good with words and doesn't really know how to approach this anyway. It's been a long day and her lack of words just turned into this and she's not even a little bit sorry. I think Cassie would appreciate the sentiment of keeping her safe from a second attempt on her life. And feel a bit bad that she takes some satisfaction in hearing how devastated Gregory was over it...

The picture of him being held from his ankles on the ceiling by the Minis is pretty good revenge too. They're proud of that one lmao

[fadeawaywithyou]

immediate first reviews of the (non-nightcore) Mammalian Sighing Reflex album from Wilbur!

spoilers below if you haven't listened to his album! I really like it! Also, I'm not looking into lyrics online just yet, it's very late and if I do that I won't sleep cause it'll just consume my mind for hours.

-Amazon Standing Lamp: I love the guitar here and I laughed when it took me about 5 seconds to realize the higher voice isn't a woman, but actually Wilbur Soot singing alongside himself. He's sampling something at the end I don't know.

-Mine/Yours: The lyrics about kissing like a job and tongue and teeth *mwah* and the last line ohhhhhhh boy. The beat reminds me of a beating heart.

-Around the Pomegranate: the instrumental at 30 seconds in is SO GOOD the beat with the distorted voice is so fun. i can make out the lines "no one else can save you" and "nowhere you [can?] return to". This whole song is very fun despite the lyrics and meaning. It's just a very experimental. I like when the music gets very loud. Speaking of the lyrics the ending where Wilbur says he wants to feel normal again is just...I'm gonna go lay on the floor.

-I Don't Think It Will Ever End: Again with the experimental music! It kinda immediately reminds me of that part in Bo Burnham's Inside, the song "All Eyes On Me" where he has a mid-song monologue. It is very interesting in a meta-sense due to the comparison I can't help but make between this and Wilbur's streams. Where he's got a "chat" or audience responding to him in a cheery voice no matter what he says.

-Glass Chalet: I like the scratchy feeling in the instrumental. He's throwing stones in a Glass Chalet, which according to google is like a fancy type of cabin found in the mountains (the alps, specifically?). Also, I love the sampling he's doing with the talking at the end.

-Melatonin 130: I like the distorted voice at the end. He's really experimenting with this album and I'll keep saying it because I love it! I love the ending lyrics about everyone hoping you fail and the apes with coloring books, I think he said?

-Oh Distant You: The music takes up most of this song, instead of the lyrics, but what is sung is very nice.

-Eulogy: One of the lyrics hits very close to home. Not in a good way, but not in a bad way either. I guess it'll depend on the day I listen to the song. It's a good song. I like it a lot.

-Dropshipped Cat Shirt: The distortion kinda reminds me of those hyperpop songs that went viral on tiktok back in 2020 and it's very new to hear it used in this way with these lyrics and the general tone of the music. The last line! God, what is it with this album and the final couple of lines that hit me upside the head? I just need someone to tell me I'm tired???? God DAMN. shit...

-The Median: Very good. I like these shorter songs in between full-length songs. It's just a minute long but I really like it.

-Trying Not To Think About It: The lines about romance and marriage...man that's relatable. this is probably gonna be my favorite song. And then the rest of the song just.../pos but ooooooof

-10 Week Rule: It's a good song. Was NOT expecting that line in the chorus, which I'll let people reading this find out themselves.

Overall, this is an excellent album! I really love it and I will be listening to it constantly. This gives me the same feelings that YCGMA gave me, while still staying very distinct. It's not more POLISHED than ycgma, but it's clearly made with Wilbur's more improved skills in music making. (there is a word for this i can't remember rn)

I'm gonna commit to picking a favorite song after a couple more listens, but so far I really like Trying Not To Think About It and Around the Promegrante. This is a very creative album and I'm glad he's experimenting here. This doesn't sound like Lovejoy, and I'm super happy. It's unique, it's fun, and it's sad!

[lloydfrontera]

berkis seems to be so powerful do you think he will able to do something like return og!lloyd and suho back to their original bodies? bring suho's original body to their world? and stop the restoration of fate? ignoring the if he isn't a lazy bum that will find this situation bothersome, but do you think berkis has these abilities?

nope! stopping the restoration of fate is one of the very few things that berkis can't do, not because he's a lazy bum but because it's actually out of his reach

Altering the path of fate was not an easy task. No, it was almost impossible. Like an overly tight bowstring, no matter how much you attempted to yank adn stretch it to change its shape, it returned to its original form as soon as you let your hands go. "That is the phenomenon called the restoration of destiny," explained Berkis dully. "That is how tenacious destiny is. And its restoration power is formidable." [...] "Then what am I supposed to do to stop destiny?" Lloyd felt dizzy as he heard these words. "I don't know," blurted Berkis nonchalantly. "Excuse me?" Lloyd's brow lifted. "Didn't you hear me? I don't know." "Wow." Lloyd gaped. "How am I supposed to know that? Do I look like a god?"

now could you argue that this is berkis not wanting to give lloyd any more incentive to ask for his help with dealing with the restoration of fate? yes absolutely this bastard led lloyd on a wild goose chase with the jewel of truth cause he didn't actually think he would be able to find all the materials and he wanted to get him off his back but. i kinda do want to take his word for it. if only because he sounded genuine when he asked if he looked like a god to know the answer.

plus. we also have confirmation that the king of hell can't do it.

"I'd like for you to clarify one thing. If I promise to work for Hell in the future... Could you put a stop to the restoration of destiny?" Lloyd asked, pining all his hopes on this question. He desperately wondered if he could save the Count, Countess, Julian, Scheherazade and everyone else around him by promising, no, signing a contract to diligently work in Hell after death, in exchange for stopping the restoration of destiny. Hell's King clicked his tongue. "I did make the right judgement about your character. You are a good man at heart. But unfortunately, that is not possible." "Even... if I promise you?" "No." Hell's King shook his head, saying, "No, the restoration of destiny cannot be stopped once it has begun regardless of anyone's opinion, including mine. The phenomenon can think and act for itself. It will not stop until it meets its goals." "It reminds me of a computer program," said Lloyd. "Yes. It's similar to a computer program of your world." "..." "It must be clear to you by now. It's out of my control," said Hell's King with finality in his voice. "I see." It was not a lie. The fact was painfully clear to him. The matter was beyond the King of Hell's control.

and if the king of hell can't do it, i'm willing to bet the archangel or berkis could neither, as they are somewhere in the same level of power.

but we also got more explicit confirmation of his from the webtoon. which. i am willing to take into account for this one thing because it doesn't directly contradict anything in the novel :P

as for whether he could return og lloyd to his own body and lloyd to his,,, i don't think so. for one thing not even the king of hell knows why lloyd took og lloyd's body in the first place and he's the one that deals with souls the most and the one that would have a better idea of why or how it happens, but he can only give his opinion, not an outright fact. i doubt berkis would know or have the power to anything about it that the king of hell couldn't.

so. yeah :]

[i-dont-get-how-this-app-works]

snippet of 'time' on wattpad

Shoto and Y/n have been coerced into marrying each other but seem to be unable to actually have a proper conversation. After Shoto saves her from a villain he realises it might be just him shes not close to.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

" Why did you leave the house?" Shoto mumbled to you as you walked side by side to his apartment. You couldn't help but absorb the sights that were offered to you by Shibuya.

" Are you going to help him?" You asked, looking at another druggie who had fallen on their face and was struggling to stand up.

Shoto had a thought that he was very ashamed of, one that reminded him of before he had made friends with Midoriya at UA, it also reminded him of the phone call they were meant to have in two hours.

" Yeh, I'll help." He mumbled going towards the man and helping him sit up against the wall, he was going to be done with it until you went up to the man and started asking where he lived.

" Excuse me." You shook him, your voice quite gentle as if you were speaking to a child. " Do you know where you are?" You asked, getting a few murmurs in response.

" Sir?" You put your hand out and Shoto almost slapped it, however, he didn't want to seem like a performative hero who only worked for fights so stood by your side as the man placed his hand in yours and stood up.

" Let me take you to the police station and they can take you home okay?"

Shoto almost groaned, feeling like this was a waste of time, there were hundreds of drunks around, they were just smart enough to stay in alleys and not come into his viewpoint.

" Shoto where is the station?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He ought to have slapped you for bringing him on such a mundane task. He had originally wanted to dump the man and go, yet here you were getting chummy with the police.

" I saw that as well, the little cosplay shop, the girls were so pretty!" You exclaimed sitting on the shared desk of two officers.

" It's so nice hearing about it from someone not from around here." The female one smiled pinching your cheeks as if you were a child.

" Do you really not have it where you're from, oh yeah, you guys are proper workaholics you don't leave work cause you're scared people will judge." The male one teased.

" That's actually true, everyone there is around you guys' age and they always want to stay in the office, that's why we don't have as much fun as you lot here." You pointed at the man you brought in. " I bet he had a really fun night, almost jealous."

" It's nice of you to bring him in, but remember, you don't need to, there are hundreds on one street, they're usually still alive in the morning alright." The male one ordered though he found it refreshing that you brought him in.

The female one nudged your shoulder, " So how'd you get Shoto to come with you? Wanna know if there's a site for this stuff wouldn't mind meeting up with Eraserhead."

" Eraserhead?" You tilted your head.

" Oh, he's underground she's really obsessed with him, forget that, how'd you meet the hottest hero of the year." He pointed at a magazine page that had been ripped out and pasted on the wall, with Shoto looking deeply at the camera with a soldering look lasering your heart immensely.

" He's my roommate."

There it was again, you calling him your roommate as if the nuptials weren't binding. He felt that you hated him and that you were very good at hiding your feelings as proven with your crying last night and your avoiding speaking with him.

" Roommate huh?" She raised her brows at you trying to allude to something more.

" It's not like that, I'm waiting till -" You stopped yourself from saying marriage realising you were married. You almost laughed at the irony.

" I'm waiting, plus I prefer Dynamight." You whispered to the two hoping Shoto wouldn't hear.

" You kids these days always go for looks and never personality, that man is so rude, he's only good for catching villains and a camera nothing else." The male one shook his head in disappointment.

" You're right," you admitted, " it's his looks his personality scares me a bit." And turns you on you would've mentioned if it was one of your close friends.

" I understand, I find Eraserhead very attractive but he seems very scary and sorta boring."

"Wait search him up I wanna see what he looks like." You mentioned shuffling yourself so you were sat at the other side of the computer.

" We could talk about pro heroes that we find attractive."

" We can look at Mirko edits after this." You exclaimed.

Shoto stood up abruptly sensing your drift into another conversation topic. If only you spoke this easily with him.

All three of you turned to him with a quirked brow.

" What's wrong?" You spoke up first thinking he might be sick or claustrophobic or anything, you were very bad at reading people that's how you always seemed to overshare.

" I think it's time we go home." He told you, his voice stern as if he was your carer.

" Yeh, course sorry for keeping you up." He turned to the two others in your company, " he's been very busy since early morning nonstop working, heroes need breaks too. It's hard thinking about how much they sacrifice to keep us safe."

" You're completely right, I remember when I saw Mirko work for 2 days straight because the villainy just wouldn't stop."

" Same with Dynamight I heard that he-"

" Y/n."  He called feeling you about to get dragged into another conversation.

" Yes coming." You called. " Nice meeting you guys."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

" So why'd you leave the house?" Todoroki asked again, checking if you were just avoiding conversation with him.

" I was hungry." You shrugged.

" Oh, do you want me to buy you something?"

" You don't need to I've got money." You replied bashfully, not wanting this stranger to pay for your food and you'd have to owe him money.

" No it's fine it wouldn't affect me much." He urged feeling like he owed you for what he put you through.

" Please let me buy it myself." You begged, wondering why it was such a big deal since you'd always find a way to make your friends pay for this type of thing.

" Ok." Shoto complied realising that you wouldn't drop the fencing you put up that separated him from being your friend and kept him on the border of stranger.

" Thank you."

Wattpad - aiysan2

[moon-blanket]

My world is forever changed by the Cataclysm. Here is my descent to madness.

There's So Much More in my notes app, but that would make this post MILES long. So i've condensed it to the highlights :3

It's That Time of Year Again

Reminds me of the Prologue of the first Vaxis album from Coheed and Cambria for absolutely no reason at all. This is probably something only I will understand. And this is okay.

Light the Match

I just realized that Asher has taken over David's low, rumbly voice :((

Milo's "who you callin' a runt" had me on my knees. And Asher whispering to him afterward YEAAAAAAAH.

Alexis "shared a bed" with Quinn for FORTY YEARS ??? LMAO ??? The way Vincent drags Alexis's name through the mud is a little hilarious though, so bold.

One Misery for Another

I cannot get over how drastically different Imp!Lasko is from Prime Lasko. It's an entirely different person. I'm into it though.

Lasko wanting to continue their conversation when the "normal business hours" are over is a little unnerving !! That's a little icky sire !!

----

VINDEMIATOR MY BABY MY BABY I COULD CRYYY !!!!

He sounds so relieved to see them. I'm going to go Nuts.

Him hating that Freelancer has to put up with so much just to be able to See Him, and them saying that it's all worth it :(( He sounds so SAD. He just wants them SAFE :(((

THE RETURN OF "My Love" YEAAHHAHAHAAA.

Holy shit the Demons are gonna take over the Academy. Just the idea of all of the Demon Boys knowing each other makes me giggle though :3

Vin doesn't want Freelancer in any more danger than they already are just to help them in their cause :(( and he Knows that they would do it in a heartbeat regardless :((

ooough my freaking GOD Vin reminding them that they don't owe any of them to do this, He's the one that owes his life to THEM :(( HE JUST WANTS THEM HAPPY AND AT PEACE, AND HE WANTS TO GIVE IT TO THEM SO BAD. WAAAAH.

God the acting in this video is SO GOOD ROOOOOAR.

Was Anton in this before he was introduced in the Prime Universe ? bc that's Cool if that's the case.

The Luxury of Morality

WE BACK WITH ASHER YAAAA I'M SAT AND I'M LISTENING.

He already sounds like he's warmed up to Babe a significant amount. He sounds so soft. I'm shaking the bars of my cage about this.

Asher mentioning Avior is So weird to me. My worlds are colliding.

Once again he sounds So Much like David and that makes me So Sad.

"I'm already dead. We all are. I'd rather go out knowing I tried something. Anything." i'm tearing UP.

"You want to know so bad ? Sit." AAAAAH OKAY !!! OKAY !!!

Alexis killed the Keaton Pack all by herself ?? Oh my god ???

OUGUGHHhhash Asher saying that Babe gave him and his Pack something to fight for :(( A way for his anger to actually Mean someething. To make something Good of his life for once.

He's forever grateful to them WAAAH. OUCH DUDE. Okay yep he's my Imperium Favorite. We have a Winner !!!!

What You Deserve

Oh, it's Imperium Vega !!! he's actually very sweet, I see the appeal now. This is so nice.

----

OH we're picking Right Back Up with Freelancer and Lasko. This seems.... kind of normal right now. I feel Dread.

Asking about partners... saying "That body..." TO them... HEY. Leave them alone >:(

"You're with your own kind" is a CRAZY thing to say Lasko !!

VIN HAVING TO WATCH THEM DO ALL OF THIS ? OH MY GOD. VIN WANTING TO JUMP IN AND SAVE THEM I'M GOING CRAZY !!!! Hearing him this heated has me kicking my feet !!! and giggling !!

Dude i'm scared while Freelancer is doing this !!! the door rattling is frightening !!!

HE TOOK ALL THE AIR OUT OF THE ROOM ??? WHAT THE FUCK ??

Lasko these pain sounds are So Interesting !!!

"Get your Pet to Safety" / "They are Not my Pet." / "You and I use different words for the Same sentiment. Get the "human that you care for" out of here"-- EATING THIS UP WITH A FORK AND KNIFE.

VEGA CUT LASKO'S THREADS LETS GOOOO.

Worth Dying For

"Say hello to Scorpio !" / "It's Scorpius"-- this is so cute LMAO. WOOO !!!! HI GBA !!

ASH WANTS TO OVERCLOCK HIS CORE ?? WHAT.

----

JETT ?? COMISSIONER JETT ??? CONSUL JETT ??

DAMIEN EXECUTED ANGEL ??? WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING.

Angel you are a Hero. Rest in Peace you will be So missed. I love you forever.

----

Milo is Such a good Beta. And a good Friend. He's so concerned for Asher :(((

Asher really is cookin' up a plan fr. I feel like it sounds good in theory, but i just Know that this shit is going to go south real quick.

Milo saying Asher's Full Name instead of "Ash" about all of this :(

I LOVE MILO SO MUUUCH I'M WEEPING HE CARES SO MUCH AND SO DEEPLY. HE'S BEGGING ASHER TO LET HIM BE ABLE TO HELP :((((((

MILO KNOCKING OUT ASHER ???? ASKING FOR HIS CORE TO BE OVERCLOCKED INSTEAD ?? IT'S THE INVERSION ALL OVER AGAIN ?? HE'S GONNA TRY AND TAKE ALEXIS OUT HIMSELF ?? MILO HONEY PLEASE.

Truth Will Out

Sam what the fuck are we doing outside of the academy right now sir !!

Now why do i think he's lying about really wanting to help out against the Imperium.

----

Starlight has officially earned their petname :')

After Avior pointed out how it never stops raining, I think i get why Gavin said that storms remind him of Aria in his one HBW audio.

----

"You're too gentle, Pet." yeah i'm going to go nuts about this.

The way Vega talks about them and the trust they put in him :((

Oooh Vega called in the Vampires. That's intriguing. General Vega sir yes sir o7.

THEY STRIKE TONIGHT ? WHAT.

----

VINDEMIATOR TAKING CARE OF FREELANCER WOOOOO.

Freelancer wants to run away with Vin and forget everything :(((

He wants to save the world specifically so Freelancer can live. What if I start crying again. Get them their little house in the woods NOW.

His little "but what if they fail ?" HURT. OUCH.

"Put your arms around my neck. Hold onto me. We're getting out of here." oh my god i'm INSANE. THE DELIVERY WAS PERFECT. The quiet reassured determination oh my god oh my god.

But it also !! Scares me !! What if he really IS what they need to save the world ! aahhah oh no !!

if i said i wanted more Sad Gavin would all of you be mad at me. Him professing his love in 500 little ways through tears Got Me. That was delicious. Can we have More of that please.

Tantum Tyrannus

This title goes So hard by the way. If google serves me right it means "Great Tyrant." I'm sure You All knew this already. But i did not.

Oh my god is this Sweetheart asking where Milo is. IT IS.

Sweetheart insisting they come save Milo too RAAAAH. They pulled the "I'm not letting my Mate die when i can Do something" card and it worked LETS GOOO.

----

NATE WEXLER IS HERE TOO ? No way this man is voiced by Erik. Man Damien said Fuck Global Warming.

----

ALEXIS VOICE !!! This was Groundbreaking when it released. I'm glad they got the same VA for the Summit. Hey girlypop. How are you.

MILO OH MY GOD. SHE BROKE HIS ARM DUDE ?

SHE FELL FOR THE BAIT DUDE LETS GOOO. That seemed too easy. What !! IS MILO OKAY. PLEASE LET HIM BE OKAY. Milo you are my Hero do not die.

----

Asher throwing Alexis's head down in front of Vincent is ICONIC.

"Impressive bite." / "Want me to show you ?"-- Yeah i'm on my knees about this.

MILO'S ALIVE WOOO !! ASHER KILLING VINCENT WOO !!!! SPITTING HIS BLOOD OUT !!! ASHER TALBOT THE MAN THAT YOU ARE !!!!!

Last Wish

All of my notes this section have :((( on them LMAO. I was SAD.

Milo's little "hey" when Asher opens the door :((( he sounds so exhausted this whole video :((

We're back to Inversion magic worries oh no. Asher reassuring Milo that he's still family regardless, just like David did in the Prime. I need to stop crying PLEASE.

Asher admitting to Milo that he couldn't have done it alone. Milo telling him how important he is to the Pack :((((

MILO ASKING WHY THEY'RE STILL CALLED SHAW PACK :((( BECAUSE THEY'LL ANSWER TO HIM REGARDLESS :((((

Oh my fucking god the reason being that Ash doesn't need to be honored with the name, David and Darlin' do... and he's not ready to give up David's name yet :(( OUCH.

WHEN HE SAYS DAVID WAS HIS MATE HIS CORE STAYS DARK :((( So the Shaw Pack is a way of keeping that feeling alive in a more Human Way.

ASHER CRYING IN MILO'S ARMS :((((((((

"I love you, Ash. Please come home." STOP MAKING ME CRY.

Asher saying "Take care of each other, okay ?" to Sweetheart and Milo. you know the way he meant it. I'm going to YELL.

----

Vega reminding Avior that he is needed to lead, but the strike is happening now-- so Vega will do it. Scary !!

Despite their arguing, Vega refuses to fight Avior because he respects him. That's nice.

VEGA CAN SEND PEOPLE BACK TO ARIA ?? HE CAN RIFT ?? You know. This makes sense giving that we know that Vega is as old as he is now.

Okay. Well. Goodbye Avior and Starlight ! I was about to wonder if they get stuck in Hell again, but immediately got my question answered LMAO.

The mentioned tears and voids, like in Prime. Are those holes in the Meridian ?? They have to be right. That's why Project Meridian exists. Wires in my brain are connecting now. I understand.

This Meridian is loud as FUCK.

"Child of Land. You are needed." RETURN !!! LETS GOOOO !!!

----

Asher hitting the door... kinda got to me !! that was a little hot !! I kicked my feet about it a little bit !!

BRACHIUM ????? What the hell are you doing here loca !!!

Finale | All Cruel Things

FIFTY ONE MINUTES ???

Vega is scary !! But the words he is saying are poetic as fuck !!

----

THEY BOUND ALL THE INVOCATIONS TO BRACHIUM ???

OOoh Brachium being the First exiled Demon. How interesting.

Asher talking about how there's No One Waiting for him. That there is no "Other Side" to get to. David isn't waiting for him somewhere :((( Everything he ever cares for keeps Dying. And are Gone. :(((

I am just sitting in awe at this whole interaction. I am Mystified.

----

Sam's evil laugh !! Hello sir !! Is this Sam and Vincent talking. Do you think they're besties :3

This whole conversation between him and Damien is. yummy.

----

E'LAETUM AND MIN'ARA !!! Hi guys !! Or you !!

"Let us speak through you" oh my GOD ? They got Blake'd. They stopped Vega's rift !!! I'm sure that's what happened in Prime too.

"Bring us a Sovereign" Do you think this is the solution in Prime also... do you think this is what Hush is for. Lots of things to think about this.

Once again this Meridian is loud as FUCK !!! OUCH !! i'm just trying to hear everyone Talk dude. Please be so nice to me.

THEY TOOK EVERY SOVEREIGN ?? ESSENTIALLY KICKED EVERYONE OUT OF ARIA TO FEED ?? FLOODING IT WITH DEMONS ??

ECHO ???

----

Sam turned Damien ... . . .. oh my god. HE MAKES HIM LICK HIS BOOT ?? CALLS HIM A BITCH ??? WHAT IS HAPPENING LMAO. Thinking lots of things right now. Lots and lots and lots of things.

----

SAM CROWNING HIMSELF KING ??? Okay that's kinda a slay. I see the intentions he had on wanting to help Vega.

This place is about to go fucking Crazy with all the Vampires. Asher and Avior you gotta get your people OUTTA HERE.

ECHO AGAIN ??? Ooough it's the ending !! Honestly what an amazing ending. What a great cliffhanger, even though it's not a cliffhanger at all-- it's an end. Ending two worlds just to save the divider. They did in fact Trade One Misery for Another, oh the cruel irony.

Surely this won't happen in the Prime right ? haha. . ..

----

THERE'S MORE ??? A POST CREDITS SCENE ?? I wonder how far into the future this is. Probably not too terribly far.

SAM GOT HUXLEY AS DAMIEN'S MEAL ??? OH MY GOD ??? Doomed Romance....

The tension is CRAAAZY. HE'S TURNING HIM INTO HIS PROGENY ??? HELL YEAH DUDE.

Final Thoughts: This was AMAZING !!!! Why did I avoid this for so long. How could you all keep this from me. Asher, Milo, and Vindemiator are my babygirls. I could literally think Forever about the Imperium Wolf Pack, and I hope Vin and Freelancer are able to keep their peace somewhere in the woods. I have a bunch of Imperium Fics that need rereading ASAP. The brainrot is Disasterous. You are my hero if you read ALL of this. I owe you my life. I'm so sorry lmao.

[luna-nigthshade-wood]

What they don´t know, will hurt them

Summary: Dean Winchesters attempts suicide on a dirty motel bathtub, ending brain dead on a hospital. A trickster promises John and Sam that he will save him for “free”, as long as they both get through watching a series of Dean´s memories, good and bad. The twist is that they will feel everything Dean did at the time and they can stop it at any time, but then Dean will die. They both accept thinking it cant be that bad. Spoiler: it is worse.  

Chapter 29

Sam feels heartbroken watching Dean´s memories. Somehow, he realizes, Dean´s happiest memories are the ones that break his heart the most, perhaps because he already knows how the story ends. He knows that there is no happiness waiting at the end, he knows there is only pain and suffering at the end, pain and suffering caused by their own hands; blood that neither he nor his father could ever wash from their hands.

 The scene starts once again and this time it shows, Dean entering a tattoo parlor, a woman is standing with her back towards him, there is an inexplicable nostalgia in the air, but Sam and John figured they will understand the reason soon enough.

-Hi, welcome to Ally´s parole- the woman says, turning slightly, the Winchesters get a small glimpse of her face, but they don’t need more to recognize her as Alana, Dean´s friend. The girl doesn’t seem to spare Dean more than a glance, before returning to her previous task- How can I help you?

-Yeah, hi- Dean responds, with a shy voice, that seems to gain confidence the more he speaks- I want a tattoo

-Kind of figured, dude- Ally responds, rolling her eyes- Where do you want your tattoo?

-On my dick- Dean responds

-I hope the design you want is tiny then- Alana responds automatically, for some reason the Winchesters don’t understand (but that Dean does) that startles her enough, for her to turn around and face Dean for the first time. Recognition hits her, and suddenly she is embracing Dean

-Dean? Is that you?- she asks happily

-Sure hope so, otherwise after that exchange, this hug would be awkward- Dean responds with a hearty laugh.

-Oh fuck you- the girl says punching the hunter´s shoulder- Man, it is good to see you, you haven’t change a thing

-But look at you, I seemed to remember that arm with less color- Dean says, pointing at her friend´s colorful sleeve of tattoos.

-Yeah, well, you know what they said, cant trust a tattoo artist without tattoos- Ally answers with a big smile- Where have you been, Sonny´s boy?

-Here and there- Dean answers as the Winchesters feel a wave of sadness invading them- I am actually staying at Sonny´s for the time being, trying to arrange my head

-Be as it is, I am glad you are here

-Thank you- Dean responds- But tell me about you? This is your gig?- he asks

-Yes, you are seeing at the proud owner of her own tattoos establishment- the girl answers

-I imagine your mom was super happy- Dean comments sarcastically

-Oh yeah, she hates it, hasn’t spoken to me in a while- Ally says rolling her eyes

-Her lost- Dean responds honestly, which makes the girl smile to him- So how is Steve?

-Being a mess, as always- Alana laughs- He is now the coach of the wrestling team at the school. They don’t suck as much as before- the girl tells her before a masculine voice interrupts her

-Is that a compliment I hear, Alana-banana?- Steve says entering the shop

-Go fuck yourself- Ally responds without any bite, before adding- Look what the cat dragged in

-Well, I´ll be damned- Steve responds- Dean Winchester, in the flesh- he says before hugging Dean- how have you been?

-I have been�� I am better now- Dean responds with honesty, making his friends smile softly at him.

As the friends keep catching up, the scene fades into the background, leaving a bittersweet feeling in the room.

 In the short time they had been viewing Dean´s life, scenes like this are the ones that remind John everything he took away from his boys. John´s crime against his family keep piling up, as he comes to the understanding that the one responsible of most of his kids, specially Dean´s, tragedies are ones of his own making. John wants to come back in time and punch himself, as he realizes, that he is the reason why Dean doesn’t have more memories like this, he is the reason that Dean have barely any friends. In his goal of making his sweet boy a good hunter, he isolated him to the point, that the only people he could rely on was his own family, the same family that ditched him the moment they didn’t need him anymore. John can only hope that these moments of peace last a little longer, for Dean´s sake

 Of course, the peace wasn’t meant to last. It started small, or so the Winchesters figure, as clippings of newspapers start to appear on the screen, the news talk about kids, ages ranging from 7 to 12-year-old, going missing. They see Dean reading the newspapers with a frown that gets deeper and deeper as days pass, and the hunters know why. Because any hunter worth their salt can recognize the MO of a rawhead preying on children. It is not until the fifth day that everything changes.

 The scene starts with Dean entering Sonny´s house, two patrol cars can be seen outside. The older hunters can feel the jitters of nerves that Dean is feeling and they had nothing to do with the cops inside the house. Still, Dean powers trough, entering the living room where Sonny is arguing with two uniformed man

-I am telling you, he would never do this- Sonny is angrily telling the cops

-Sonny?- Dean asks- What happened?

-Tony is missing- Sonny tells him, Dean quickly recognizing the name of the youngest inhabitant of Sonny´s house- And this “gentlemen”- Sonny spats- are telling me there is nothing they can do because “48 hours hadn’t passed yet” and “he probably ran away”- he exclaims

-Tony would have never done that- Dean automatically responds, because it doesn’t make sense, regardless of the reasons Tony is at Sonny´s house, he is a good boy

-Sonny, that is not what we meant- one of the cops tells him, he is obviously the “nice one” out of the two of them, because it doesn’t take long for his partner to respond

-It is exactly what we meant- the older one tells them- there are other 4 boys missing, your boy probably wanted some of the attention for himself- he spats before muttering- couldn’t expect more for a….

-I dare you to finish that sentence, pal- Dean tells him with barely conceal anger and a dangerous voice that makes the cop inch for his gun, before Sonny steps between the two and the other cop says

-Ok, lets relax all of us. Carter, that was out of line, take a break- he tells him, making the other cop stalked out of the house, angrily. The cop sighs before turning towards Sonny- Sonny, look, you have to see it from our side, four kids, two of them from prominent families, are missing, we have no clues and the mayor is breathing on our necks

-So what you are saying is that Tony´s life is worth less, because he is not from a “prominent family” and has a criminal record- the man deadpans, and for a minute he looks as dangerous as his record shows him to be

-Look man, we will do our best- the younger man mumbles- And hey who knows maybe he just decided to skipped class today- he says with a false cheer in his tone

-Get out of my house, Carl- Sonny spats, making the cop hightailed out of the house, leaving only Dean and Sonny inside the small living room.

-Sonny…- Dean starts to say, before being abruptly cut by said man

-Don’t, Dean- the man says, all fight leaving his body, as he seats in the sofa, putting his head in his hands- I know what they all think, but Tony would have never done that

-I know- Dean responds- I believe you- he tells him, before asking, insecurity creeping his voice- Do you trust me?

-Of course I do, Dean- the man says startled, clearly not knowing why the change of subjects and to be fair neither do the Winchesters watching- What…

-What if I told you that perhaps I can find him?, but you have to trust me- Dean asks, the hunter in him making itself known

-Dean, what do you mean?- Sonny asks bewildered

- I can find Tony, or at least I can do my best to find him- Dean continues- I once told you that my bruises were because of a werewolf, I know you think I was lying to protect my father, but I wasn’t- Dean tells him, before adding- I know I can find the son of a bitch that took Tony and I know because I have an inkling of what kind of monster took him and the other kids, but I need you to trust me- he finishes, there is devastation in his words, that makes the Winchesters balk on their seats, Dean is clearly preparing himself for rejection, the Winchesters are prepared as well, which is why they are surprised with what happens next

-Dean, I…-Sonny tells him- I trust you- he tells him- But you have to understand that this sounds insane

-I know- Dean sighs

-But as I said before I trust you- Sonny tells him surprising him (and everyone in the room)- And my gut had never stirred me wrong before, what do you need?- he asks with a tired smile, it takes a few minutes for Dean to get out of his own head, but soon his hunter side takes over

-When was the last time you saw Tony?- he asks with no preamble

-At breakfast today. He was supposed to go to school, but the teaches say he never made it

-Did he walk there? Was he alone?- Dean inquires

-Yes, he always walks to school, he usually goes with Mark, but as you know Mark is sick with the flue- Sonny answers

-Alright, was there anything unusual about today? Did Tony seemed spooked? Did he complain about strange noises? Was there anything off about his room?

-No, there wasn’t anything different about him today

-Alright, do you know his route to school? Does he pass any wasteland? Any place that has a weird creepy history? A place that you probably told him to walk faster or not alone even if you don’t know why?

-I… I don’t- Sonny starts before pausing- Yeah, actually, now that you mention it, I can think of a place. The old Mason´s house. It has been abandoned for years and not for the lack of trying of some, it is just almost as if…

-As if the place was haunted- Dean concludes- I have been investigating the other kids dissaperances and I can only think of a monster that fit the bill, since…

-Since no bodies had shown- Sonny finishes

-Well, yeah- Dean answers- I think I know what fugly it is and your haunted house seems like a good place to start looking for

-Alright, so lets go- Sonny says standing up

-Hey, wait a second- Dean tells him, stopping the man- There is no we, I am going

-The hell you think you are going alone, one of my kids is in danger and I am not standing with my arms cross as another one puts himself on harm´s way to rescue him- Sonny tells him crossing his arms- We are going and it is final

-Yeah, Dean- a female voice interrupts- we are going with you

-The fuck did you come from?- Dean asks startled to see Ally standing under the doorway

-I heard about Tony´s, came here to help, saw the assclowns speeding out of here, and caught tail of your conversation- she answers- Now, at this point there are two options, either you are having a breakdown, which is reason enough not to leave you alone, or you are telling the truth and monsters are real, which is even more reason to go with you, strength in numbers and all that

-You have zero training- Dean answers- Neither of you is coming with me and that is final

-Sweetie, I would like to see you and try to stop me- Ally says standing her ground, there is a hot minute when they all stand still, but finally Dean relents and says

-Fine, you are both coming with me, but you have to follow my lead

-Of course- Sonny answers

-Roger that, Capitan- Ally says with a mock salute

-Also, I know Sonny probably does, but do you know how to use a weapon, Al?- Dean asks

-I have a taser gun, does that count?- she counters

-Actually now that you mention it- Dean answers, closing the scene

 The Winchesters don’t get even a chance to ponder on it, before the next scene starts. This time the Impala and a truck pull outside of the abandoned house, the three occupants getting out of their respective vehicles with Dean talking the lead

-Alright, you know the plan- Dean tells them- We are going quietly through the house looking for the missing kids, Ally you take the left, Sonny you take the right and I take the center and we convey before checking the basement, any sounds of trouble and you scream

-Alright, and where do I go?- Steve says raising from the back of Ally´s truck

-The fuck?- Ally asks- Where you there the whole time?

-What can I say? I heard you all were going in an insane mission to save kids and I figure what the hell, I am coming with them- Steve grins, before adding with a serious tone- Also, one of the kids is in my class, I aint leaving him alone- Dean nods at that

-Alright, you stay outside then- he says, giving him a walkie talkie- See anything werid, you call it. Alright lets go

 The group enters the house quietly, each one searching their respective rooms without luck, before meeting at the top of the stairs, ready to check the basement. They climb down the ratty stairs, and it doesn’t take long for them to see five figures clutching in one corner, Tony among them. Sonny pockets his gun and rush towards them, Ally and Dean close in his heels

-Sonny- the young boy, all but screams- you came

-Of course I did, kid- Sonny answers embracing him as Ally checks the rest of the kids

-A monster took us- a younger boy tells them

-He was going to eat us- another one cries

-It is alright, you are safe now- Ally says.

-Kids, the monster that took you?- Dean asks, taser still at the ready- Where is it?- this question makes one of the boys look up and then there is a scream, as the kids and the adults turn their backs towards the monster. Dean barely has time to push the kids out of the way, before the monster charges towards him, making him lose the taser in the struggle. Dean falls to the floor and looks up at the monster, only for it to be crisped to a bone, Steve firing the killing shot

-The hell was that?- he asks almost out of breath

-A rawhead- Dean answers automatically- You may know it as the bogey man. Thought I told you to stay outside?

-A thank you is enough- Steve tells him- you butt called me on the walkie talkie, figure you might need help- he finishes shrugging making a laugh escape Ally´s mouth, and soon the whole room is laughing with relief

 The scene once more shifts and this time it shows the group standing outside sitting in the truck of Ally´s truck, as the police and paramedics help the children to their parents and checking them over

-So this is what you do for a living, Dean-o?- Ally asks him, all of them watching the proceedings in front of them

-Kind of- Dean answers

-I said it once and I will day it again- Sonny says- You are a good one, Dean- he tells him clapping his shoulder

-It doesn’t always end like this- Dean tells them

-But today it did- Steve says- You are a hero, Dean, and don’t let anyone, not even yourself, tell you any different- he finishes, before giving him a hug, ending the scene in a light tone

 And that is the quicker isn’t it, Sam thinks, that doesn’t matter all the good that Dean does, he has never once considered himself a hero, not after pulling a young Sam out of the fire, not after taking care of Sam all his life, not after saving so many people. Dean has always considered he has done what anyone else would do, without realizing that not everyone would have done all the things he does, did… Dean´s self-stem had never allowed him to see himself as anything but flawed, but Sam knows the truth, he knows his brother is a hero, he just wishes he had appreciated it when he had the chance.

 John watches the scene, wanting to clawed his eyes out of his skull, this is the comradery that he denied his son, these are the kind words he kept quiet after a hunt where his son had saved the day, these and more were the things that slowly but surely broke Dean´s self-stem piece by piece, until there was nothing else. His son is a hero, everyone can see it, except himself and his own family. Once again, he realizes too little too late, the errors of his way and once more there is nothing he can do to change it.

First chapter <<Previous Next>>> AO3

[ipegchangbin]

bully anon is filling my pea brain with insane thoughts... I have now become a bully aswell

making channie do you homework in front of you while you sit right behind him and sneak your hands under his shirt, dragging your nails along his sides making him shiver and inching upwards to his nipples🥰

rubbing them and noticing the way his breathing picks up so you lean your head ln his shoulder and notice that he stopped writing, so you tug at his nipples harshly making him arch his back and whimper in pain🥰

scolding him for being such a pervert makes his stomach churn with the shame and humiliation and his head spins. now he just has to finish (the homework) while you tug at his nipples, face flushed a deep red🤭

❕mean reader, degradation

LIA HEY OKAY IVE MADE THIS ASK MARINATE MOSTLY BECAUSE I HAVE MANY THOUGHTS ABOUT THIS

prefacing this by saying if i end up dead, just know that lia and bully anon are the culprits (affectionate & with love). and the cause is death by sub!chan 😭

chan wouldn’t be able to sit still in this state. unfortunately, he wouldn’t be able to cum either, because under your command there’s no such thing as cumming without permission.

let’s make it better though: chan is attending your online lecture for you and doing your homework while tuning in.

your hands find his nipples, fingers pinching hard, sending shockwaves all over his body. your embraces catches him and puts him in place. it doesn’t help that he could feel your own perked up nipples behind his back. the cooing from your lips followed by the plush flesh nibbling on his sensitive earlobes don’t help him.

“better perfect those notes, channie. i want good scores on the exam tomorrow.”

poor channie clicks his pen to redeem some sort of focus. “m-mhm,” he mutters.

“what do you mean ‘mhm?’ use your words.”

“y-yes, i will.”

your face lights up. “thanks, baby,” the pet name makes chan whimper through a bitten lower lip.

he crucially forgets that you weren’t done with your sentence.

“but you’re not focusing well. your handwriting’s wobbly, you’re not even writing anymore. what are you, useless?”

it was a good thing that your device was on mute and your digital camera was off. the risk in showing your pathetic boy toy to your class was addictively thrilling, sure, but exhibitionism could be saved for the future.

there were no labels yet but you still wanted to him to yourself. your best guess behind this behavior is that you can’t get over the thought that nobody gets to hear the moans of the university’s biggest people-pleaser.

before you could get too into your head about it, you grope at his chest and flick hard on his nipples at the same time, reminding you of his sweet voice. and, of course, reminding him of his place.

“i’ll be good!” that’s exactly what you wanted to hear.

…actually, sub!loser!chan is the death of me. lia and bully anon get a pass, this channie has effectively killed me

thank you for sending this in!!! ILL CRY NOW

[kpopmakesmeweep]

badboy!yeonjun x innocent!reader 

word count: 21k

angst, fluff, smut

when your teacher asked you to tutor in the beginning of the school year, you were hesitant even then. 

you knew that it meant your lunch period and one study hall for the day were gonna be completely booked, helping younger kids grasp the basic idea that the mitochondria was the powerhouse of the cell.

but then you met one young girl desperate to pass her first test in october and knew your teacher had gotten you, sending a small, defeated smile her way as you gave her the okay to put your name on the list. 

you didn’t expect to come back from winter break with the news that the next student you’d be tutoring wasn’t a sweet 7th grade girl but none other than choi yeonjun. 

the overwhelmingly attractive but horribly intimidating boy who was a year older than you and had, quite possibly, one of the worst reputations the school has ever seen.

if he wasn’t getting suspended for fighting or smoking on school grounds, you’d attempt to block out the mindless gossip about him and all the college girls he’d frequently fraternize with. 

he was in your lunch period when you were a sophomore and he was a junior and you couldn’t help but be fascinated by how handsome he was. how he carried himself and how everyone else seemed to be fascinated by him too.

he was always wearing some variation of black, like his closet was just an empty void of black leather, dark cotton and chains. if he didn’t have on a beanie or hat, his then blue hair was a mess of waves that always made you look a few seconds too long.

you’ll never forget the day that he caught you, your nose in a textbook as you studied for a midterm before a loud shout of his name caught your attention. 

you looked up and watched one of his friends playfully punch him in the arm, something about him hooking up with the older girl he had his eye on first and yeonjun only smirking at him devilishly. 

he didn’t look apologetic or regretful in the slightest, more so like he’d do again just because he could and just because he knew the girl would be eager to have another go with him. 

your breath caught in your throat when his deep brown eyes met yours, his head cocked as he held your gaze with all the confidence and smugness you could never have. 

it took his lips quirking into a cocky smile for you to snap out of it, cheeks warming and stomach churning at getting caught before you dropped your gaze right back down to your book.

it was a quick and thorough reminder that this is where you feel comfortable and this is where you belong - with your nose in a book and your mind on your studies. 

you’ve always intended to just get through high school with good grades and minimal distractions, a small (almost non-existent) friend group that left you able to make straight a’s and work a small, part-time job.

you’d done a pretty good job of that thus far, no bad boys covered in all black and sliver chains to show you that, maybe, getting out of your comfort zone isn’t such a bad thing after all.  

you met yeonjun during your 7th period study hall a week later than intended, him not showing up to either of the periods your teacher informed you both last week. 

you weren’t surprised in the slightest but also wouldn’t dare tattle on him, simply dodging the questions from your teacher or giving her a polite smile and cryptic answer. 

but you couldn’t even stop the way your eyes widened when the library door opened and he was making his way toward you, black beanie placed on his head along with a dark shirt tight across his chest paired with gray sweatpants that made you bite down on your lip.

his hair was pink now, long with a slight wave to it that looked all too soft and inviting to touch; the color probably shouldn’t work on anyone but, of course, it works on him. 

devastatingly attractive in a way that doesn’t seem fair nor human. 

he hasn’t said a word to you, he wasn’t even within six feet of you yet, but you were already scared shitless. you already didn’t trust yourself to be around him and not make a bumbling fool of yourself. 

a pretty smirk crossed his face when he stood in front of you, looking down at you with a playful look in his eye that was far too mocking and sinister. 

“hey. y/n, right?”

you never would’ve pictured this man saying (or even knowing) your name, nor him looking at you so willingly and intensely, but you have to quickly snap yourself out of it. 

this was as professional a relationship could be between two students and you really had to get it together. 

“hi, yes... that’s me,” you say softly. 

so softly that you’re not even sure he can hear it but you can, unfortunately, hear the tremor in your own voice and it’s nothing but absolute embarrassment. 

he happens to like it though, if the way his eyes light up and his smirk widens tells you anything. 

“i’m yeonjun.”

“i know.”

you say the statement far too quickly and it causes your face to warm, your mouth hanging open as the amusement continues to build behind his eyes; you can see with your own that the boy is too handsome for his own good but something tells you he’s probably far too charming as well. 

“i mean... we were supposed to meet last week,” you attempt to clarify.

it seems like a good save, something to make, both, your embarrassment lessen slightly and for him to know you’re aware that he missed the two sessions last week. 

but it doesn’t seem to work, the boy sitting down across from you with all the confidence and smoothness in the world. he leans in closer and you hold your breath, horribly lonely and touch-starved heart fluttering in your chest. 

“i know, sorry about that,” he says, a genuineness in his voice that you can’t help but question. “i was busy with some things.”

you don’t know what to say so you don’t say anything, not even wanting to think about what kind of things keeps a man like him busy.

your teeth sinks into your bottom lip nervously and you can just feel his eyes burning into you, moving across your pink face and down to your soft white sweater; it makes you look every bit as innocent as he’s presumed you to be and he can’t say it doesn’t make him smile. 

“and yet, the teacher didn’t say anything to me about missing.”

you meet his eyes at his questioning tone, so scrutinizing and intense that you feel very grateful about your decision not to blow up his spot; you don’t even wanna know what he looks like when he’s angry. 

or maybe you do, some darker and suppressed part of yourself thinks. 

“that’s because i didn’t tell her,” you say quietly, a lump forming in your throat that you’re trying desperately to push down. “i didn’t wanna....” 

you almost say tattle and you think your face wold turn an unnatural shade of red if that silly word left your mouth in front of him.

so you meekly and sweetly decide on, “i didn’t wanna get you in trouble,” a smile gracing his face that almost makes you feel like you’d done a good job or something. 

and how ridiculous does that sound? you did a good job for the older, delinquent boy - you don’t know what’s gotten into you. 

maybe his smile and his eyes and just the way he’s looking at you is making you feel as if you’re actually something to look at - you’ve never really been observed the way he’s observing you. 

a deep, melodic chuckle leaving his mouth causes you to swallow nervously, watching him with a blank expression because you’re not sure if he’s laughing at you or with you.

your heart stutters when he leans back to stretch, his arm squeezing at the back of his neck; it takes everything in you not to watch his arm flex.

“how’d i know you were a good girl, hm?”

your eyes widen at his words, stomach swooping in a way that’s only ever happened when you watch couples on tv or read about a romance in books. 

because it’s not only his words, it’s the way he carries himself. the way he’s looking at you and speaking to you, the way you never thought anyone would - let alone him. 

he must mistake your utter...shock and fascination for confusion, eyes wide and cheeks flushed and he suddenly wants to place his hand on your cheek. 

see if it’s as warm and soft as it appears to be in this very moment.

“you were in my lunch last year, no?” he hums, looking directly at you with zero ounce of fear and ever bit of confidence. “always with a textbook or writing something.”

he doesn’t remember all the girls that gawk at him but he remembered you immediately. 

caught your gaze early last year and saw something flicker in your eyes, a soft and innocent fascination he wasn’t used to seeing but immediately made him wanna ruin you - he wanted to ruin you and he didn’t even know you. 

he just knew that he’d watch you sometimes, discreetly and quickly, but enough to get his fix.

when he entered the cafeteria and made sure you were sitting there with your your face buried in a book. 

when you’d get up to buy lunch or a bottle of water, pull down your skirt or adjust your hair in a way that made him wanna touch you in a similar fashion.

when you’d leave five minutes early (in what he fantasized was so you wouldn’t be late) and send him one last glance. feel your soft, hesitant gaze on his face and meet it carelessly at the very last second.

just enough to watch you get shy and see the blush so similar to now cross your cheeks. 

he didn’t know your name and he, truthfully, never intended on learning it. because as much as he wanted to truly ruin you, he knew that’s all it was - a dark, twisted fantasy that someone like him shouldn’t act on. 

but then when he walked in and saw you here, the tutor he was dreading to meet in such a familiar position, he knew immediately that you were her. 

the cute girl from his lunch he wasn’t sure was an angel he wanted to protect or someone he wanted to fuck the shit out of. 

you weren’t sure what to think right now, not wanting to get your hopes up or think too much into his question - you were in my lunch last year, no?

think that you were special and he remembers you for reasons far too fantastical so you only nod, figuring he could be taking a guess; there’s only three lunch periods after all. 

“yeah. your hair was blue.”

a smirk crosses his face, chest warming at the fact you remembered him (even though the cocky, confident part inside of him knew you would). 

“yes it was,” he confirms, smiling down at you in a way that makes your heart jump and pound even more. ”i was hoping you’d remember. because i knew i recognized you from somewhere.”

you don’t know how you’re gonna do this. you can barely look at him, how are you supposed to talk to him and teach him twice a week and actually-

“i do wanna ask you something else though.”

your eyebrows pull together at the slight change in his voice, cocking your head to the side as you look at him.

he’s leaning in a little closer now, tiny pink strands hanging from his beanie as his brown eyes bore into yours. there’s still some amusement twinged in his eyes but it all looks very deceptive, unnerving a part of you that your stupid little heart is ignoring. 

he doesn’t allow you to ask him what before he starts talking again. 

“how about we keep these sessions the way they’ve been?” 

your eyebrow raises as confusion continues to plague you; your sessions haven’t even started? 

you haven’t even taught him anything, what could he possibly- but it’s the moment he opens his mouth to speak again, you realize that’s exactly the point. 

“you tell the teacher i’m coming to these and i’ll tell her what a good job you’re doing. how much i’m learning from you and shit.”

a smirk crosses his face when he peers into your eyes, catching the nervous, unsure look in them that only makes his smirk widen - you really are too cute. 

you, on the other hand, don’t know how you feel about his suggestion; you just know how you feel about lying. 

it doesn’t sit well with you and you don’t wanna get in trouble. 

the teacher has a class during this period so it’s not like she’d come down and check but it still makes you incredibly queasy. 

and if he needed tutoring in the first place, he obviously needs help. he’s a senior and needs to keep his grades up so he can graduate. it’d be your fault if he didn’t pass and you’d hate to be the reason he gets-

movement in front of you causes your thoughts to immediately stop, body freezing as you watch him lift his arm and bring his hand to your head. 

he moves a strand of hair from your face before smoothing out the slight crease in your forehead, biting down on his lip when he feels your skin is just as soft and smooth as he suspected. 

“what are you thinking so hard about?”

the deep, low tone of his voice and inquisitive look on his face is dangerous, almost as dangerous as the frantic beating of your heart and the way it’s about to pound out of your chest. 

it’s like he has electric sparks shooting from his hand, making you feel extremely exposed and vulnerable even though his touch is quite gentle and innocent.

“i.... it’s just....” you stutter out, taking a deep breath because you know you need to get it together fast. “you’ve been having trouble, right? that’s... why you needed tutoring in the first place.”

his eyebrow quirks up at your comment and for a split second, you think you’ve offended him. 

“i don’t want you to fail, yeonjun.”

he doesn’t allow himself to dwell on your words, realize that no one has so openly and sweetly said that to him before. or even cared enough to tell him that they don’t want him to fail.

he knows the teachers and counselors get him help because it’s their job. 

he knows his parents bitch and complain about it because they don’t want him repeating high school or wasting their money. 

he knows anyone who says anything to him about it is just doing it to make themselves look like a good person or friend. 

but you just so openly and sweetly said it, a deep concern in your eyes that he knows he can’t dwell on or his similar feelings are gonna arise from last year’s lunch.

where he’s about to throw caution to the wind and do anything and everything he wants to someone as innocent and sweet as you; but he can’t do that and he knows it, he knows that’s why these session can’t happen - on top of the fact that it’s not only you. 

he smokes during lunch and into this period. 

and there’s just no fucking way he’s spending that time suppressing his predatory attraction to you while learning about shit he doesn’t understand and being high as a kite. 

“you don’t gotta worry about me, angel,” he hums lowly, the name falling so naturally and smoothly from his mouth, he doesn’t even realize. “just do that for me, yeah? then you’ll have 7th free.”

you don’t hear much after he calls you angel, just that he’s asking you to do something for him and you’re blindly and dumbly nodding because he just called you that.

and it’s not until he smiles and thanks you deeply, looking over your face once more before saying that he’ll see you around that you realize you’re alone. 

sitting there as you watch yeonjun walk out the door without a glance back and come to terms with the fact you just agreed to lie to your teacher for him.

for almost a month, you were able to keep it up.

it was terrifying and debilitating and it almost sent you into a full blown identity crisis, but you’d somehow managed to do it.

that was until this afternoon, when your teacher cut through the cafeteria during lunch with a cup of coffee in hand and suspicion in the pit of her stomach. 

she saw you sitting there alone, your own books sprawled out around you as you wrote down notes before her short call of your name had your head snapping up. 

her eyes watching you quizzically made your own widen, stomach sinking and heart starting to pound as he she made her way over to you. 

“hi, y/n. where’s yeonjun today? it’s wednesday.”

the period only began ten minutes ago so it wouldn’t be weird for you to say that he wasn’t here yet. that he got held up after class and would be on his way shortly.

but you were just nervous and so bad at lying that you blurted out that he left to go to the bathroom, her eyes roaming the table in what you could only assume was for his books. 

“he took his backpack with him,” you tell her quietly, smiling softly in an effort to hide your guilt and distress. she only hums softly before nodding her head, taking your word for it because why wouldn’t she?

you’re good and studious and wouldn’t ever lie to a teacher.

but then when she comes down to the library next week during 7th period with her class, catching you at the table by yourself, you do it again. 

look her in the face and panic, make a scene of collecting your books as you tell her you forgot you guys were meeting in the cafeteria today - placing the blame on yourself.

you spent the rest of the period in the bathroom, collecting your thoughts and attempting to calm yourself down because you can’t keep lying. 

you haven’t even talked to yeonjun since the first time you met in the library, only seeing him in passing in the hallway or after school. 

he’ll send you a nod paired with his signature smirk and you’ll send him a small smile back, dipping your head before your cheeks flush at the mere sight of his eyes. 

you wish you hadn’t agree to this. 

you wish he didn’t effect you so much and you wish you could tell him you either need to actually help him or tell the teacher he doesn’t want to, because you’re losing your mind. 

you’re anxious and upset and not feeling good about yourself, barely able to look your teacher in the face these days. 

it’s on a friday before lunch, the bell ringing ready to dismiss you from her class, that it all comes crashing down.

she asked you to stay behind for a moment, everything about her face calm and neutral as you made your way over to her desk. 

you were anything but calm as you stood before her, that familiar feeling of dread and guilt rushing in your stomach as you smiled softly at her and asked if everything was okay. 

“yes, i just wanted to say what a great job you’re doing with yeonjun.”

you don’t even know what your face looks like but you know it’s probably the face of someone incredibly guilty, being praised for something you haven’t been doing and taking credit for it even though you know it’s wrong.

the feeling in your stomach confirms all of those feelings, tight and fluttery and buzzing with upset.

“o-oh?” 

“yeah,” she smiles tightly, looking over your face before speaking again. “we just took our third test and he did great. in the low 90s.”

a part of you desperately hopes that to be true, that maybe he started applying himself and somehow started to grasp the material all on his own. you smile at the thought that that’s the case, nodding your head as you, against your better judgment, keep up the facade. 

“i’m happy for him. he’s been working very hard. w-we studied at our last session for it, actually, and he really seemed to be understanding it.”

the contemplative look she gave you should’ve been the first sign that she knew you were full of shit, a quiet hum leaving her mouth. she holds your gaze until the moment you drop it, looking down at your white sneakers until she calls your name softly. 

“y/n... why have you been lying to me?” 

your lips press together as tears prick your eyes, all of the guilt and shame rushing through you at once. 

“he failed his test and i know you guys haven’t been meeting.”

she knows that because you can’t lie. she knows that because yeonjun still doesn’t know anything and all of the students she’s recommended to you have passed with flying colors. 

she knows because when you look up at her, your lip is trembling and it looks like you’re about to burst into tears.

“i... i’m so sorry.”

but even then, even after this moment right here, you’re still not gonna tell on yeonjun. because you don’t want him getting in trouble and you’re not gonna try to excuse your own behavior by admitting you agreed to it. 

you’re just as at fault as the older boy and you’re not gonna pretend you’re not. 

“why have you been lying? you could’ve just told me if you didn’t feel comfortable tutoring him or it wasn’t working out.”

because she knows yeonjun’s reputation. she knows he’s a year older and that you’re one of the shyer students in her class. she was hesitant at first to even put you two together but thought you’d be able to get through to him. 

and because you don’t know what to say, how to make up an excuse that puts neither of you at fault, you don’t say anything. just continue to apologize with teary eyes and a shaky voice before she eventually lets out a sigh. 

“take the next few days to figure it out. try to work on it with him or come to me and be honest that it’s not gonna work. but you didn’t have to lie to me, y/n. i’m a little disappointed in you.”

those words hit you harder than you care to admit, more tears building as you nod your head and quickly leave the room.

you knew from the beginning that it was wrong.

you never felt good about it and you knew it was bad but you still took part in it. she has every right to be disappointed in you and it feels like everything you worked so hard for has been ruined. 

now you look like a liar who can’t be trusted. 

now any time you tell her about another fellow student you’re working with, like the 7th grader you got through to or the 9th grader you helped get an a on their test, she’s gonna wonder if you really did that.

if you really helped them or if you’re just lying about that, too. telling them the answers to their homework or lazily explaining the concepts to them like you don’t work hard with each and every one of them. 

you’re surprised to see yeonjun when you make it to lunch a few moments later, your stomach still in knots and left over tears in your eyes. 

you don’t even realize you’re standing in front of his table until you hear one of his friend’s deep voices, a brash “who are you?” not even filling you with fear. 

you’re only looking at yeonjun pathetically, wide teary eyes and pouty lips in an effort to hold back more tears.

yeonjun’s dressed in his usual attire but you can’t even focus on that, his pink hair flawless against his black shirt and chain hanging around his neck as he adjusts it carelessly. 

soobin’s words catch his attention before your appearance does, looking at the front of the table and taking in the sight of wide, teary eyes and pouty lips; it pulls at something in his chest more than he cares to admit.

“yeonjun, can i talk to you for a second?” 

your voice is wobbly and timid and everything about it so incredibly embarrassing, the tears in your eyes obvious to all the young men around the table. 

you probably look like some girl he slept with and then left on read, begging him for another chance because your heart can’t take not being with him. because you got attached and now it feels like you need him. 

but, really, you just need him to let you tutor him. 

you can’t disappoint the teacher anymore and you had a job to do with him; you should’ve never told him that lying would be okay. 

“who’s this?” his friend asks with a smirk, his hair a bright shade of purple that looks striking next to yeonjun’s. 

“no one,” yeonjun’s quick to snap, looking at you before quickly getting up and guiding you out of the cafeteria by the small of your back. 

he walks down a secluded hallway and out to the garden of the school, looking at the tears in your eyes and feeling himself frown. 

“what happened?”

“i... she found out we haven’t been meeting,” you mumble, feeling silly and childish for crying in front of him about something like this; but you can’t help how you feel, you can’t help feeling sad and guilty about all of this. 

your heart drops when he actually smirks at you, looking over your face with a gaze that’s just as soft as it is amused.

you’re almost positive he’s about to laugh at you, call you a loser for crying over something as juvenile as getting caught in a silly lie and hurt your feelings even more. 

but then you’re quickly stiffening when his hand reaches up, gently brushing at your tears and marveling in just how soft your skin is. 

“that’s why you’re crying?” 

you’re embarrassed to say the least, any words you’d use to justify your reaction caught in your throat - and the smirk on his face isn’t helping either.

“you’re too pretty to cry over stupid shit like that, y/n.”

“it’s not stupid,” you respond, voice shaky and demeanor meek but still able to talk back. 

because it’s not stupid to you. wanting to be nice and studious and a good person isn’t stupid. not wanting to be a liar or someone who goes back on their word isn’t stupid. 

“she trusted me to help you and i lied to her.”

“we lied to her,” he says, voice and eyes teasing as he bends down to be on your level. you think he’s trying to make you feel better, a soft playfulness on his face that does anything but.

because you aren’t like him. 

you aren’t cool and feared and you can’t not care about how you effect other people. 

“why didn’t you just tell her it was my idea?” he asks suddenly, his eyes roaming your face in such a gentle but curious way. “she probably already knows that.”

“i... i didn’t want you to get in trouble.”

he rises to his full height as a small smile crosses his face, your soft voice and sweet words again effecting him far too much. he shouldn’t feel this way toward you and he shouldn’t want to be tutored now.

he shouldn’t be reaching out to touch the smooth skin of your cheek, a few stray tears making his lips fall into the smallest of frowns as you hear his voice the softest it’s ever been. 

“i wouldn’t get in trouble, angel.”

and there’s that word again. making your wet eyes widen and stomach to flutter, wondering how and why that simple word sounds so nice leaving his mouth. 

maybe because you’ve never been called that before. 

could only imagine being called that by someone, let alone him, in such a way. or maybe it’s because it is him, the boy you watched for months on end, forever fascinated by the way he carried himself. 

or maybe it’s because-

“but even if i did, how’s that your problem? why would you care?”

it’s a fair question you suppose but it doesn’t stop you from licking at your lips nervously, an all too familiar (and embarrassing) blush warming your cheeks. 

“i mean... it’s not,” you mutter shyly, not sure if you’re more intimidated by him calling you out or the look on his face. 

but even with those feelings, you’re still able to meet his gaze. 

take in the deep, dark intensity staring back at you in his brown eyes. they’re softer than one would expect, almost soft enough to make you forget what you were wanting to say. 

“but it’s just as much my fault as it is yours. so it didn’t seem fair.”

he smirks so he doesn’t say anything too brash, looking over the blush on your cheeks. his hand itches to move your hair behind your ear, a move he’d always do because he knew it was charming. 

knew it’d get him laid and get a girl’s heart fluttering.

but now he wants to do it just to touch you, feel your hair and skin and watch the blush on your cheeks deepen; but before he can do anything, he’s surprised to hear you speak anything.

“but it’s also not fair to keep lying,” you say softly, a broken little smile crossing your face as you look at him. “i actually really hated the lying... so if you don’t wanna do the sessions, i’m gonna tell her it’s not gonna work for us. but if you change your mind, i’m still free during those periods.”

at that moment, he had every intention of telling you no. 

he didn’t wanna give up his free time and energy to learn about things he’s absolutely sure he’s never gonna need to know after this. 

he didn’t wanna sit through the sessions high or not get high at all, the only way he’s able to cope with the last period of the school day knowing that he could roll a joint in his car with soobin. 

he didn’t wanna resist his obvious attraction and borderline fascination with you, act on it in a way he knows you’re not ready for and in a way he shouldn’t.

but when he walked in the library on monday, the time he told you he’d get back to you, you looked up and smiled at him. it was such a small, quick smile but everything about it called to him.

the twinge in your eyes and the way your hair fell, how even though your smile was small, it lit up your face and made you the prettiest girl he’d ever seen in his life.

at that moment, you were positive he was about to tell you no.

that thanks but no thanks, he’s absolutely not gonna spend his free period being tutored by a younger student who only stutters and blushes in his presence. 

but when he sat down in front of you, a smirk on his face and eyebrow quirked, you couldn’t even hold back your look of surprise. 

a deep chuckle left his mouth when he caught your expression, the sound one of the best noises you’ve ever heard.  

“what? did you think i wasn’t coming back, angel?”

it took you a month to see yeonjun was just as confident and just as much trouble as you’d expected. 

he was far too charming and attractive and funny, a sarcasm and wit in him that made you muffle your giggles like a middle school girl. 

you weren’t used to talking playfully with the people you tutored, always so focused on getting the work done and making sure you were doing a good job explaining the material for them.

but yeonjun always made sure to delay it, attempt to get to know you before you could even discuss his homework or review sheet; and even though it hasn’t been easy, he’s been persistent in breaking down that wall you put up.

“did the flashcards help or do you think you’re more of a-”

“why don’t you ever go out?”

you suppress the urge to let out a sigh as you turn to look at him, his expressive eyes looking over your face.

you’ve gotten used to the feel of his gaze on you, almost like it was burning into your skin and leaving you exposed to the bone, but it didn’t help when you made eye contact.

looked into his eyes and saw him looking back at you so confidently and so easily, you couldn’t help but feel flustered.

“what do you mean?”

you know exactly what he means but it’s the only thing you could think to say.  

you know more than anyone how much time you spend alone in your room, watching tv series and reading books and reorganizing until you don’t even recognize your own space.

but it’s not that you’re bothered by it, that’s what you like going. not going out isn’t something you find bad or upsetting.

“i mean i see people from your grade at our parties a lot,” he hums lowly, his eyes leaving yours only to look at the soft, pastel pink material of your sweater.

“but you’re never there,” he continues, looking at you and cocking his head to the side questioningly. “why’s that?”

“well, i’m not...invited, i guess,” you mumble out, ignoring the way your cheeks warm even more. “i like sticking to myself. and staying home.”

the words and your tone bring a pout to his face, your eyebrow raising at the sight. why is looking at you like that?

“well now you have an invite,” he says, a teasing smile crossing his face. “come to my friend’s party tonight. soobin, do you know him? he has the purple hair?”

his voice is far too sweet and soft compared to the look in his eye, teasing and flirty and reminding you of just how dangerous he is. how he’s capable of having so many different sides, he nearly gives you whiplash. 

he’s the bad boy everyone thinks of him to be, skipping class and getting high and ditching tutoring lessons by smiling too kindly at a mousy little tutor. 

he’s the play boy you see come out when he looks at you a second too long, bringing a blush to your cheeks and stirring something very unfamiliar in the pit of your stomach. 

but then he has a softer side you see sometimes, like when he decided to do these lessons in the first place because you cried to him and made yourself look even more pathetic. 

“i’m happy you decided to do these,” you say to him quietly. 

it was only your second session but you wanted him to know you were supportive of his decision. that, even if your word meant nothing (because, really, who are you to him?), you were proud of him.

it’s not easy for a senior to give up a period or two to learn about things they don’t understand; you probably wouldn’t wanna do it either, if school and learning didn’t come naturally to you. 

but for whatever reason, he agreed to do it.

“oh?” he hums, the trademark smirk on his face causing your cheeks to warm.

“yeah,” you smile softly, nodding your head before looking down at your clasped fingers. “i just... wanted you to know that. i understand why you didn’t want to but i think it’ll be good for-”

“why do you think i didn’t want to?” 

you look at him and for a split second you’re scared that you offended him. you suppose you don’t really know him well enough to make an assumption about him but you just assumed he-

“or, you know what, no,” he says, shaking his head as he pushes his chair closer to yours. 

he leans over the desk the same way he did during your first meeting last month, bringing your faces closer until you can smell cologne and the faint stench of cigarettes. 

“i wanna hear why you think i changed my mind?”

you quirk an eyebrow as you look at him, staring blankly until you realize he just plans on doing the same. 

“well... i guess it’s because you wanted to do good, right?” you ask meekly, unsure why he changed his mind but knowing that you were happy he did. “and maybe you didn’t wanna disappoint the teacher.”

a deep chuckle leaves his mouth that has butterflies erupting in your stomach, watching as he shakes his head and meets your gaze again. 

“is that no it?” you ask bravely, your wide eyes and confused look causing his own stomach to do flips. “what’s so funny?”

but he’s quick to push it down, reach over to ruffle your hair in a way that makes your eyebrows pull together. 

“nothing, angel,” he mumbles, his eyes roaming yours. you see the exact moment there’s s witch behind them, a flirty and darker front he puts up melting into a soft, vulnerable look.

“but thank you for telling me that. because i’m happy i’m doing them, too.”

he has yet to tell you the reason all these weeks later, probably because you wouldn’t dare ask again, but whatever it was, must’ve greatly inspired him.

because over these weeks, he’s really been putting in the work. writing notes and listening to you and asking questions when he’s not making you blush or inviting you out just for you to decline. 

“so...?” he asks, a charismatic smile stretching across his face as he looks at you awaitingly. “what do you say? you wanna come?”

“no, thank you,” you smile politely, feeling bad for downright denying it but the offer feeling far too similiar to cliche movies you’ve watched. where the popular boy invites the nerd to a party and everyone laughs at her, questions why the hell she’s here and pulls some stupid, immature prank on her.

but this isn’t a movie and you don’t think you even have the capacity to show your face there, nor would anyone care that much to target you. 

dismissing him is easier than really considering you hanging out with him outside of this library. seeing him in a different setting and allowing him to see a different side of you.

not you looking at him pleadingly, your eyes moving to the paper in front of him as you ask him to do the next question.

“i’ll do it if you come tomorrow night,” he says, a sigh leaving your mouth as you look at him in frustration.

“yeonjun...”

because if there’s another thing you’ve learned about yeonjun, it’s that he knows you have trouble saying no to him. it could because he sees the naivety in you, seeing something good in him at times and thinking you’ll really be able to help him.

but maybe he hopes you can help him, too. be a person he can lean on and know 100% is gonna be there for him. 

“c’mon, y/n, don’t you wanna have a little fun?”

“i don’t think i’d find it fun,” you mutter honestly, a pout forming on your lips that has him swearing he’s never wanted to kiss someone as much as he wants to kiss you in this moment.

just brush his lips gently against yours, hear the little sounds and see your reactions that he knows will be the best thing he’s ever had. hold your waist and feel your skin against his that while it’s juvenile to him would be so much to you. 

“you don’t know until you try, y/n,” he mutters lowly, looking up at him and seeing his gaze is, as usual, unrelenting. “have you ever been to a party before?”

of course you’ve been to parties before; birthday parties, graduation parties, wedding parties - but you’ve never been to a high school house party. 

and are you about to tell him that? absolutely not. 

“of course i have,” you mumble, a smirk on his lips because he can tell by the way you avert eye contact that you’re lying. “but it’s just... especially with kids from school who i don’t know? i don’t think it’d be fun, yeonjun.”

“but i’d be there?” he whines, something very uncharacteristic of someone who is known to be a bad boy. “isn’t that fun enough?”

you let out a groan as you frown again, tapping the notebook in front of you lightly as you meet his close gaze. 

“your test is next week, yeonjun. can you please focus on that right now?” 

it’s not until the next session that he thinks to use that to his advantage, supposing he can stand one more party without your presence as he smiles over at you. 

“let’s make a deal, angel.”

you know when he calls you that that you’re not about to talk about school or his test, looking over at him with a raised eyebrow. 

“if i get 100 on my test next week, you come to one of soobin’s party.”

you have to suppress a groan at the way he’s not letting up on this damn party, biting down on your lip as you do your best to give him a serious look.

“you should get the 100 because you want to, not because you’re trying to-”

his finger on your lips is the next thing you’re only able to focus on.

not the pounding of your heart or increasing anxiety at the thought of a party or  the fact that there’s more people in the library than usual today. 

you’re only aware of him touching you, a quiet “sh,” leaving his mouth that has your stomach fluttering far more than you care to admit. 

he meets your wide-eyed gaze and smirks at the look on your face. his finger presses down on your bottom lip gently, dragging it slowly and watching as it pops back up. 

there’s an almost pained look in his eyes that you can’t make out, his eyes never moving from your lips before meeting your gaze again. 

“i want a lot of things, y/n,” he says, his voice deep and gruff and making your heart pound even more as he looks to your mouth again. 

you feel your lower stomach swoop at the way he bites down on his bottom lip, his other hand ghosting over to rest of your knee. 

your uniform skirt comes just above your knees, becoming higher when you sit and perfectly exposing your tight covered legs. his large hand rests on your knee like it completely belongs there, like he’s gonna dare anyone to tell him it doesn’t belong there and to take his hands off you.  

“things i probably shouldn’t tell you yet so your pretty little face doesn’t become beat red,” he mumbles in your ear, his warm breath fanning onto your skin and making a shaky, embarrassing sigh leave your mouth.  

but just him realizing that makes your cheeks flush. everything about his closeness and his words and the way he’s just saying these things to you right in the middle of the library. 

the way his hand is slipping inside of your knee, fingers resting on the inside of your thigh that has some dirty, repressed part of you desperate to spread your legs just a little bit more for him.

feel more of his skin on you and heighten the feeling building in your lower half. 

“but i can assure you, none of them are an on my test. but if that means getting you to spend time with me outside of this fucking hellhole, i’m gonna do it.”

just as fast as his hand was on your thigh, it’s gone and cupping your face. holding on to your jaw as he makes you look at him and has a look of softness and amusement but also darkness and arousal. 

it probably has every bit to do with the fact you let out a tiny squeal when he did so, your eyes widening and legs now spreading apart ever so slightly. 

“do you understand now?” 

you should have the power here being his tutor but you don’t. you’re the cat and he’s the mouse, you’re the prey and he’s the predator and you’re not about to do anything to stop it. 

“ye-yes yeonjun,” you say, a groan almost leaving his mouth at you how compliant you are already. 

and it’s that reaction right there that has him skipping the party on friday and spending his weekend doing something he never thought he’d do his senior year - making flashcards and studying his ass off. 

you remember being incredibly proud when, two weeks later, yeonjun came to your session with his graded test paper in hand. 

he looked happy and accomplished and ready to take on the world, a warm feeling blooming in your chest at the look on his face.

“how’d you do?” you smiled up at him, your eyes soft and expression excited.

when he flipped the test over to reveal his 100% test, your first instinct was to raise your hand for a high five. it’s what you always did with the younger kids, praising them and sharing their excitement over a test that they worked incredibly hard on.

so when you did the same thing to him, quickly realizing he’s not one of your 7th grade students but an absurdly attractive man, your cheeks flushed and you stuttered out a “sorry.”

but he only chuckled lightly and high-fived you immediately, lacing your fingers from across the table before you could pull away. the action caught you off guard more than your nerdy high-five, eyes looking down to your conjoined hands before you gave him an incredulous look.

“what are you doing?” you squeak out, fearing that your hand’s about to get clammy and your heart may explode.

“don’t tell me you don’t remember our deal?”

you realized before you even entered soobin’s house that you made a grave mistake. 

music was pounding through the open windows of the house and a few people were littered across the lawn. a drunken couple sloppily making out while another one fought about someone dancing with a stranger all before ten p.m.

you truly intended on never coming, telling yeonjun you seriously could not go through with this and had to flake out on your deal. 

but he’d been so proud of his test. not just because it meant you were coming but because it showed him he was actually capable - or at least, that was the story he told you.

and whether you were silly and naive to believe him was on you since now, you’re walking into a party looking like someone’s holding a weapon to your back. 

“so i’ll see you tonight, right?” 

you were still hesitant even during 7th period this afternoon, looking at yeonjun with a pained expression. 

“yeonjun... i really don’t know if i can do it.”

“why not? i’m gonna be there, just for you.”

you swallow down a bold, sassy remark that he’s gonna be there anyway, probably to remind your fluttering heart not to think too much into his comment. 

but is him being there enough to make you go? or is that scaring you more? seeing him outside of school, around his friends, in an environment where he can be even more bold and daring. 

after all, being in the school library didn’t stop him from creeping his hand up your inner thigh.

“i don’t just wanna follow you around all night and bother you like a lost puppy,” you whine quietly, knowing this was part of the deal but seeing just how impossible it is. 

“how could you think you’d bother me?” he asks, his head cocked to the side just as the bell ringing interrupts you. 

you let out a sigh as you stand to gather your books. you can feel his watchful eyes on you, attempting to ignore it as you silently get ready to go to next period. 

he mistakes you walking away from the table to throw out a stray sheet of paper as you leaving, quickly rising from his feet and pulling you back into him. your body collides with his before he presses you against the table, the library nearly empty as the loud chatter of students can be heard from the hallways. 

“were you gonna leave without answering me?”

his voice is deep and has a certain dominating darkness behind it, your eyes raising to his just in time to see him cock an eyebrow up. 

“i... i was gonna throw this out,” you answer dumbly, raising the crumpled up paper behind your back. 

he hums thoughtfully before taking it from your hand, crumbling it up and tossing it in the nearest garbage can. he misses but makes no attempt to pick it up, keeping you pinned between him and the table with no qualms about it. 

“you missed,” you point out obviously. 

a smirk crosses his lips as he lets out a hum, bringing his hand up to smooth out a piece of your hair. 

“i’m gonna ask again,” he mumbles lowly in your ear, his large body and deep voice quickly making your breaths quicken. 

“how could you think you’d bother me when i spent my entire weekend studying for that test?” he asks, his hands snaking down your body before gently resting onto your hips. 

him pulling you closer causes another shaky sigh to leave you, your low, warning mumble of his name only making him smirk. he shouldn’t like this so much, how you sound so sweet and flustered and are allowing him have you like this. 

“that was all for you, angel. not for me or the teacher or my parents or anyone else. just you. because i wanna hang out with you.”

you swallow the nervous lump in your throat as you raise your eyes to meet his, the playfulness that was in them turning the slightest bit dark. something in them making you lick over your lips as you try to calm your racing heart.

“you won’t even know when i’m there. how am i gonna find you?”

it’s the worst excuse you could have ever thought of but you’re not surprised since yeonjun was pressed against your body and breathing down your neck the way he was. 

he chuckled lowly like he also knew it was the worst excuse you could’ve thought of, taking your phone from the table. he slides it open and looks to you, his eyebrow raised when you just continue to stare at him blankly. 

then you remember, like every other teenager in the world, you have a lock on your phone.

“0319.”

he smirks at how easily you give it up, tapping a few buttons on the screen before handing it back to you.

“i put my number in there. text me when you’re there, 

so even with a pit in your stomach and anxiety coursing through your veins, you go to his new contact name and type out “i’m here.”

you’re faintly aware of the fighting couple’s voices growing louder, his deep groans mixed with her higher pitched whines causing you to look over. 

“i saw you touch her waist!” the girl yelps, her hands on her hips with a very obvious look of distaste. “so obviously you didn’t mind! maybe you should dance with her the rest of the night!”

“maybe i will, since you’re so god damn annoying,” he yells back, your lips falling into a frown. 

the girl meets your gaze and it’s then you recognize her as a girl in your grade. she’s from the popular group but is one of the nicer ones, always smiling politely at other students and listening to teachers during their lessons. 

she almost looks embarrassed to be caught in this scenario, a broken smile crossing her face before her boyfriend notices your gaze; you don’t recognize him, so you think he must be in yeonjun’s grade. 

“what the fuck are you looking at?”

your cheeks flush as you immediately snap your head away, quickly becoming scared and uncomfortable. you can hear her chastising him but just want to be away as soon as possible, the prospect of this drunk man cursing at you somehow worse than a house full of strangers.

yeonjun hasn’t answered your text but you still take a deep breath as you walk toward the front door, immediately hit with the scent of alcohol, b.o. and weed. there’s loud music blaring from the speakers and making the house vibrate, bodies littered throughout the house as they all talk loudly and dance.

your eyes scan the room for his pink hair, stomach sinking when you see no sign of him. 

is he even here yet? he told you he was coming at nine but could he be running late? or did he forget entirely, ignore your text as a joke and now you have to-

“hey. how do i know you?” 

the first thing you see is purple hair and you’re immediately thrown back into the crowded cafeteria all those months ago. when you so boldly went up to yeonjun with tears in your eyes and he was quick to pull you away. 

you remember the boy in front of you asking who you were, the same curiosity in his eyes now as you stand in his house looking extremely uncomfortable and out of place. 

“i... my name’s y/n,” you begin quietly, the boy barely able to hear you over the music and loud chatter. “i had to talk to yeonjun during lunch once so i went up to your table and-”

“well shit, so you’re her.”

there’s a smirk on his face and gleam in his eye, like he knows something you don’t. you cock your head to the side in confusion, watching as his smirk widens and he nods his head approvingly. 

“his tutor, right? he told me about you.”

“oh... yeah,” you say quietly, because yeah, that would make sense - his friends probably wonder where he goes during his free period now; there’s a few beats of awkward silence before he speaks up again.

“so what are you doing here?”

your cheeks flush and you wish you could blame the stuffiness of his house, looking to him as you stutter out that yeonjun invited you. 

“did he now,” he hums, his eyes roaming your face and stopping on your cheeks. he doesn’t know what exactly yeonjun wants from a girl like you but he has to be honest in saying he sees the appeal. 

“follow me then, sweetheart. you want a drink?”

you shake your head before following behind him, making eye contact with one too many intimidating boys and girls before landing on your feet. everyone’s in pretty heeled boots and crop tops, dancing and singing and grinding like they don’t have any cares in the world. 

like they’re not terrified and dreading being here, even with the knowledge that the attractive boy they may or may not have developed a crush on is lingering  around.

“oh, yeonjunnie,” you hear soonbin whine sarcastically, your eyes shooting up just in time to see his familiar black attire. his pink hair is poking out of his black beanie, the chain around his neck hanging low as he turns to look at his friend. 

“i found someone for you,” the boy says before yeonjun can respond, bringing you around to the front. 

you’re in the middle of both boys who tower over you and you’re not sure if you’ve ever felt more threatened; especially because when yeonjun looks at you, you’d think he didn’t know your name. 

because he doesn’t give you a hi or a smile or even a flicker of recognition in his gaze.

he looks at you and simply says, “well, shit, i didn’t think you’d actually come,” with such a handsomely conniving smirk, you’re not sure what to think in that moment. 

because it seems as if all your silly, irrational fears are coming true in this moment. very much like the movies you’ve seen and scenarios you’ve pictured where you’re humiliated at a party or by the popular boy. 

but his smile and his words seemed so genuine. he’s seemed so genuine getting to know you these past few months, how could he have faked it so well? 

the way your face drops and cheeks warm cause his heart to break a little, still all too aware of the questioning eyes and lingering looks thrown your way. 

“didn’t you invite her?” soobin questions, looking between you and him and noting how embarrassed you look.

“i did,” is all yeonjun responds. no rhyme or reason or answer as to why he did. just that he did. so it could very well be a joke. 

“well then, welcome, y/n,” soobin responds, reaching his hand out to you. “i’m soobin, in case we weren’t formally introduced.”

you give him a tight smile, yeonjun’s piercing gaze on yours as you take soobin’s large hand in yours. 

“nice to meet you.”

your voice is soft and shaky and brings more heat to your cheeks, wanting to die when soobin rips up one of his friends for you to sit on the couch.

“i don’t mind standing,” you insist, shaking your head and offering a small smile to the other boy.

“no, no, pretty girls shouldn’t stand,” soobin says with a smirk, catching the way yeonjun’s eyes roll and jaw clenches; it all goes unnoticed to you, though, too busy sitting down and looking at your hands nervously folded into one another.

“so y/n,” soobin says, sitting down across from you and leaning forward the same way yeonjun does during his tutoring sessions. “what’s it like to tutor this idiot?”

his words are laced with affection, as are his actions as he ruffles yeonjun’s beanie playfully, but they still make you frown. still make you wanna defend him in front of others and ensure that he’s not an idiot. 

“he’s great actually,” you say softly, lips pulled up in a soft smile. “very smart and learns fast. definitely not an idiot.”

you look to the boy to see him staring blankly at you, heart sinking in your chest; you’re becoming increasingly uncomfortable in this environment and a big part of it as to do with his attitude. 

you weren’t expecting him to be overly excited, kiss your feet upon seeing you arrive or proclaim an irrational excitement. but it kind of seems as if, right now, he could care less that you’re here.

“ahh, that’s cool then,” soobin smiles. “you’re a year younger than us, right?” 

you can only hum a small “mhm,” yeonjun’s gaze burning into your face causing you to look at him. 

it’s the same soft, wide-eyed look you give him during your sessions but right now, it’s making him feel far too unsettled. like people seeing him with you are gonna show them a different side to him he has yet to acknowledge. 

“why’d you decide to come?” he asks, not being able to stop the words; he already knows the answer, he basically begged you too. 

and because you’ve been nothing but sweet and soft to him, he’s not surprised when you don’t throw it in his face that he’s the one who enforced this. that he studied for nights to pass that test so you’d feel inclined to come. 

“i thought it’d be fun,” you say sweetly, i thought we’d be able to have fun outside of school like you claimed to have wanted. “i don’t really come to parties a lot.”

“i can’t imagine why, you seem really sweet and funny,” soobin says, a flirty smile on his face that makes a blush creep up on your cheeks; he’s so bold and confident, you don’t know both of them do it. “you should come to more.”

seeing that shade of pink on your cheeks from someone else angers yeonjun more than he cares to admit, throwing his friend a dirty look before growling at him to shut up. 

“why? she’s sweet, isn’t she? maybe i need to be tutored too,” soobin says, throwing a smile your way as he plops down in the spot next to you. “what periods are you free? maybe we can go out for lunch and have a session.”

“i... i’m not allowed to leave for lunch.”

that’s a school rule - only seniors are allowed to leave for lunch. but with the way soobin laughs and yeonjun hold back a smirk, the other people littered around also letting out soft chuckles, it appears that’s something not many people follow. 

“you can with me,” soobin assures, patting your knee softly as he sends another charming smile your way. “i’ll make sure you don’t get in trouble.”

you smile in an effort to downplay your embarrassment and discomfort, an annoyed sigh leaving yeonjun as he rises from his seat. he looks even more big and broad surrounded by these people for some reason, in his element where he fits in like a glove.

it’s even more evident that you don’t fit in here - at least in the library, that’s a place you belong. the quiet, the smell of books, the solidarity, a keen sense of-

“i’m getting another drink.”

yeonjun’s words are short and deep as he quickly gets up, hauling ass to the kitchen before anyone can even respond to him. his friend must see the look on your face too, a small pout on your lips that has the boy frowning next to you.

“don’t worry about him, he’s grouchy tonight,” soonbin says reassuringly, wrapping his arm around you affectionately. “some girl stood him up.”

the first thing you feel is a blow to your chest, an unfamiliar pain right in the center as you register soobin’s words; he begged you to come tonight but was waiting for another girl.

probably one of the many college girls, who are prettier and funnier and more charismatic than you.

so, really, you can’t be surprised. you were silly to think he liked you in the way you thought, in the way you’ve come to discover you like him because he makes you smile and laugh and feel warm inside.

but even so, you’re hurt.

you’re hurt and embarrassed and feel humiliated even though no one knows the real reason you came here and stepped way out of your comfort zone. thank god for that, you think, because it’d be even more horrible if people knew you came for yeonjun, all while he was waiting for someone else.

“oh,” you manage to squeak out, a soft look on your face despite the pain and embarrassment inside of you. “that’s too bad.”

“yeah,” soobin says, looking at you with sympathetic eyes you know you can’t trust. “he’ll be good, though.”

you bet he will, you think, because that’s just who choi yeonjun is. he doesn’t care who he strings along or makes believe is special - he’s gonna do what he wants when he wants it with no regard for how it effects other.

even a sweet little meek tutor he was able to get under his thumb the first day he met her.

when yeonjun returns, he can tell immediately that something is wrong with you. your hands are clasped together and you’re biting the inside of your cheek, fiddling nervously as you listen in on the conversation around you.

you meet his gaze and he’s quick to look away, one because he got caught and two because he doesn’t know if he can handle the look in your eye right now.

you’re always almost about to make him crack, break down into being someone worthy of you, and he doesn’t wanna do that tonight. doesn’t wanna show everyone here that, if he wants to, he can be a worthy person.

you’re a second away from breaking before soobin asks if you wanna dance, a tight smile on your face as you shake your head.

“i... i’m actually gonna go outside for a sec,” you say, knowing full well you’re gonna book it to your car and never return. “it’s hot in here. i need some air.”

“there’s plenty of air in here, angel,” soobin remarks, your eyes widening at the term.

it sounds different coming from his mouth, not as deep and melodic and it doesn’t let off a bunch of butterflies in your stomach. you’re too busy giggling softly as you shake your head that you don’t hear the deep, low noise of distaste leave yeonjun’s mouth.

you only see him grab soobin’s arm when he tries to get up to follow you, a lowly growled “let her go,” that makes your eyebrows pull together; you don’t know if he’s trying to hurt your feelings on purpose but he’s certainly doing it a lot tonight.

it feels like you can finally take a deep breath when you get outside, no one around except the chilly air and starry sky. it makes you feel a bit better, sinking down on the stairs and humming contently when your hands meet the cold concrete.

you passed by the dancing people and laughing, smiley couples inside and felt silly for coming here. silly for thinking yeonjun wanted you in his life without him getting something out of it.

what would he want from you anyway? what could you possibly give him when he’s already had so much better?

tears prick your eyes and you bury your face in your hands, taking deep calming breaths so the harsh winter air doesn’t feel like it’s burning you.

you avoided boys and feelings like this for so long and with good reason; you’re too sensitive and naive and always try to see the good in people.

you’ll put your feelings aside in order to spare someone else - you saw it in the beginning, pushing down your qualms about lying to the teacher to further appease a boy you found cute.

and when you put it like that, it sounds really fucking stupid. it sounds like, maybe, you’re just-

“didn’t i tell you you’re too pretty to cry over stupid things?”

your first instinct is to turn around when you hear his voice, his tall, dark figure looming behind you. 

you should probably smile shyly or say that you’re not crying but you can only stay silent, turning back around to avoid his intense gaze and your own humiliation. 

the same way he should probably go inside and carry on with his night the way he usually would. drinking and flirting and dancing before he probably brought someone home or into the bathroom. 

when he moves behind you, that’s what you think he’s about to do. 

but then he’s walking around your sitting frame and bending down to you, looking up at you from his crouched position. his hand reaches out to touch your face, forcing it up so you can only stare at him with teary eyes and flushed cheeks.

there’s a frown on his face as he runs his thumb across your cold cheek, his gentle touch a shocking contrast to his harsher appearance. 

“what happened?”

what happened? you think, not used to feeling so snarky and hurt. what happened was that he got your hopes up, was nice to you and invited you and kept making you feel special, just for them to come crashing down.

but then the more you think about it, the silence between you getting longer and longer, the guiltier you feel - because your feelings aren’t his fault.

you taking his looks and kindness and lingering touches for something deeper was a mistake. you know the kind of boy he is and have still been foolish enough to fall for him.

“nothing,” you grumble, a wet, humorless laugh leaving you as you shake your head. “i’m just being silly.”

but you can’t look up from your feet, your eyes roaming the cracks in the concrete, and that’s how he knows you’re lying; that, and because he knows he was being a fucking dick. 

but seeing you in this environment was weird for him. seeing people look at you and look at him, specifically soobin who got it out of him that he might like you, was unfamiliar for him.

the same way this was unfamiliar for you - which is why he wants you to talk to him. 

“what happened, y/n?” he asks, voice a tad bit harsher and deeper as he cranes his neck down. he hears your harsh, nervous intake of breath and resists the urge to reach out and touch you. 

you need to answer him before he can touch you. 

but you never do. not after ten seconds and not after a minute, prompting him to let out a sigh and pop his neck to the side. your face pulls into a grimace at the crack that sounds through the air. 

his cold hand touching your face causes you to jump, your eyes meeting and a lump forming in your throat; his eyes fool you too much and that’s exactly the problem here.

“talk to me, angel, c’mon.”

your eyes start to burn when a harsh wind passes, tears stinging your eyes and coldness rushing over your face. why does he have to keep calling you that? why does his voice have to sound so sincere and why does he have to look at you the way he is right now?

like he cares so much and hopes those tears aren’t because you’re sad.

“there’s nothing to talk about, yeonjun,” you blurt out, anger and humiliation seep into your tone before you can stop it. you let out a sigh as you try to get it together, taking a few calming breaths before shaking your head. 

“just go back inside, okay? i’m going home. t-thank you for inviting me but i-”

“i don’t want you to go.”

he blurts the words so loud and fast, it even sounds a little awkward to your ears. but he sounds and looks almost desperate, your eyebrows pulling together and heart sinking as you take a deep breath.

because you know you can’t stop the next words from tumbling out of your mouth.

“well, it doesn’t seem like you want me here.”

your words are soft and quiet but they still physically pain his chest, his eyes roaming your face as he brings them to your cold cheeks. he wipes under your eye when wetness forms, the cold biting wind rushing around you both. 

“i want you,” he reassures quietly, his voice just as low and gravely as he speaks hushly to you; he thinks it’s the most honest and true thing he’s ever said to someone. “i want you more than you know.”

“then why are you acting like that?” you question sweetly, the pout on your lips nearly making him groan and cover them with his. “you were being... mean. i felt like... you didn’t want me here at all. or didn’t want people to know you invited me.”

your words break his heart but he also knows they’re true, his fingers caressing your face gently. he notices then how freezing and red it is, looking you over and rising from his feet.

you look disappointed that he’s gonna leave, your face falling and eyebrows furrowing before he reaches his hand down to you. 

“let’s talk in my car,” he clarifies, nodding his head toward his vehicle. “it’s freezing out here.”

you bite down on your lip, contemplating it for a few seconds before another harsh gust of wind passes. you let out a sigh as you take his hand, grateful to enter his car the moment you sit down. 

he turns it on and the engine roars to life, his fingers reaching out to turn on your heated seat. 

the next few moments only consist of the car’s engine warming up as you wait for the heat to kick on, you and yeonjun stealing glances back and forth at each other; you both miss the others gaze by a few seconds and if anyone were to be watching, it’d be obvious you both were nervous right now. 

dancing along the line you’re both nervous to cross for entirely different reasons - you because you somehow don’t think he reciprocates those feelings and him because he knows you deserve more. 

but in this moment, he decides he has to be selfish. watching you with a flush in your cheeks and your lip drawn into your mouth.

“i like you, y/n. that’s why i wanted you here,” his voice says, breaking the silence in a way that almost seems more terrifying. “but that’s also why i didn’t... want people knowing.”

your eyebrows pull together and immediately your mind goes to him being embarrassed. embarrassed that you’re younger and quiet and that no one really knows who the hell you are.

he’s infamous and cool and a senior, obviously he should be with someone similiar. like a popular girl in his grade or a college girl or maybe even a the girl who stood him up.

“not because of you, angel, but because of...”

“you?” you interrupt, a snark in your tone neither of you except; but you’ve heard this line one too many times, not expecting to ever ever hear it real life, let alone toward you. 

“it’s not you, it’s me?” you ask, a gentle, faux smile on your face as you shake your head at him. “is that what you’re about to say?”

he clenches his jaw so he doesn’t smirk, resisting the urge to laugh as he looks you over carefully. it’s obvious your smile’s fake because it doesn’t meet your eyes, the teary glint in them every bit sad as they are frustrated. 

but of course, you’re too sweet to treat him as he deserves. 

his hand reaches out to grab your chin, his thumb and pointer finger on either side as he forces your gaze to his. his smirk comes through when he hears your sharp intake of breath, tongue peeking out to lick at his lips. 

“if you let me talk, angel, you’d know what i was about to say,” he hums quietly, his breath fanning into your face at his closeness. it smells of mint and beer, it should probably be gross but surprisingly isn’t.

his words successfully stir you into silence, partially from fear and partially because the look in his eye has caused you to grow warm all over; and once he sees that, he begins to speak again.

“i didn’t want people knowing because i didn’t want anyone fucking with you, y/n. because if they did, i’d have to ruin them and then everyone would see it.”

“see what?” you ask quietly, the air between you thick and buzzing as you hold his gaze. 

hold it so adamantly and intensely, you’re barely able to register him leaning closer. inch by inch by inch, until his lips are pressed against yours and you’re kissing choi yeonjun in the front seat of his car. 

you’re stiff and awkward and don’t really know what to do but it’s fine because he laces his fingers in your hair and pulls you closer. parts your lips with his tongue which causes you to kiss him back with a slow, unsure pace.

but it only causes him to smile, retracting his tongue and keeping it sweet before he pulls back and rests his head on your forehead. 

“why i decided to spend my free period during senior year getting fucking tutored, angel,” he chuckles lowly, his hand running through your hair gently. 

the soft look in his eye causes you to swallow nervously, words caught in your throat as you stare at him wide-eyed.

“i... i thought you... you said it was...” you let out a shaky breath as you try to get your thoughts together, completely unable to remember your conversation from weeks ago. when he cryptically asked you your thoughts about just why he agreed to stop lying to the teacher and do the sessions; 

so instead, your cheeks warm and you’re hit with the reminder that you just had your first kiss with him. and that you were probably absolutely terrible at it. 

“that was my first kiss. i... i’m sorry if it was bad.”

a small smile crosses yeonjun’s face as he shakes his head at you, thumb dragging down your cheek gently to feel the warm, smooth skin of your cheek. 

“it was perfect, angel, you’re perfect.” he mumbles, your eyes widening and heart stuttering as a ball forms in your throat. “so perfect that i thought you stood me up and weren’t coming. so let’s go on date. a real date, this time.”

in the beginning of the school year, you would’ve never imagined your study sessions with yeonjun would be turning into dinner dates; but as you sit in your room and get ready, your heart pounding and palms sweaty, that’s exactly what’s happened. 

it’s the fourth date you guys are going on and you can officially say that you really, really have feelings for yeonjun. you’re still shy and nervous around him but it’s only because he’s more comfortable with you too.

he takes your hand with ease and laces your fingers together that he was meant to do that.

he’ll shamelessly peck a kiss to your lips and deepen it at any given time, your cheeks burning and embarrassed voice telling him to stop when he did it in the middle of the bowling alley last week. 

he’ll watch you and smile at you and just touch you with the softest of intentions, you almost can’t believe this is the bad boy everyone claims is so mean and heartless. 

you say almost because you still don’t do it in school. it’s still a somewhat... secret fondness you have for one another. he’ll play with your fingers under the table during sessions and wink at you in the hallway but that’s about it. 

he’d probably never kiss you in the hallway or cafeteria but you also wouldn’t want that. it would draw way too much attention and probably leave your face with a permanent, embarrassing flush. 

“are you going out?” you hear your mom ask, her head peeking in before a smile brightens her face. “aw, you look beautiful, y/n. yeonjun must be coming soon.”

the topic of dating had been undeniably embarrassing with your parents, mostly because they couldn’t believe you were showing an interest. but they welcomed yeonjun with open arms, insisting to meet him at the front door to ensure he was a nice boy.

and oh had he really showed you just how charming he could be. 

“mom,” you whine in embarrassment, her laugh echoing in your room as he throws her arms up defensively. 

“you guys be careful. it’s supposed to rain soon.”

you nod your head as you finish getting ready, smoothing over your hair once more before your phone vibrates against your desk. he texted you that he was on his way with a smiley face and heart, sending one back before looking at yourself in the mirror. 

you don’t know what the hell he sees you or why he likes you but you know if you dwell on it, you’ll talk yourself out of everything. convince yourself that this is all a joke and he’s gonna turn around and say he pities you. 

even though, when you brought this up to him, he was quick to calm those worries. 

“c-can i ask you something, yeonjun?”

you were walking home from the movies with your hands intertwined.

the cold, harsh winter had blossomed into spring, the night air growing less frigid; there was a still a bit of a chill but it was nothing a jacket and yeonjun’s warm body couldn’t fix.

“of course, angel,” he mumbles lowly, a small smile on his face as you stop in your tracks. he’s quick to follow, eyebrow raising and body turning so he can look down at you. 

he cocks his head to the side when you don’t speak for a few seconds, his lips falling into a pout as his hand tightens in yours.

“you okay?” he asks quietly, thumb tracing small circles into your skin. 

you lick over your lips nervously, feeling silly for the need to ask this question but it’s one you can’t help. it wracks your mind over and over again and it feels like you’re about to-

“why do you like me?” you blurt out, unaware you even said the words until you notice yeonjun’s face morph into one of surprise. 

his mouth opens and closes for a moment, brows pulled together as he tries to make sense of your words.

“i mean, what’s not to like?” he asks softly, taking you by the hips and pulling you closer to him. 

you’re in the middle of the sidewalk but there’s no one around, the sky dark and streets desolate as you both meet each others gazes - yours full of doubt and his full of confusion. 

“i... i don’t know,” you mumble sheepishly, looking down at your intertwined hands. “i just... it doesn’t really make sense.”

“why? because i’m older? because you’re smart and i’m not?” he teases, your panicked eyes immediately meeting his.

“no! more like the exact opposite,” you clarify as you shake your head. “because you’re popular and attractive and charming and i’m just.... not.”

his eyes roam your face and his heart sinks when he sees the doubt and nerves continue to grow. how you really feel this way about yourself and are pondering the idea that someone like him would want someone like you, when really, it should be the opposite. 

“y/n, i’m lucky that you’re settling for me,” the pink-haired boy laughs out, squeezing your hips reassuringly. “you’re good and sweet and so fucking beautiful. i wanted you the second i saw you, you know, but knew i shouldn’t.”

your eyes widen at his words, shock behind them that has a laugh bubbling from his chest. 

“in lunch. i noticed you the first day and thought you were an angel,” he says, the nickname he always calls you particularly getting the butterflies going tonight. 

“i could tell that you were good. you just have this.. aura, y/n, and i knew that i would taint it. i knew you deserved someone way better. because i’m not good like you.”

"yes you are,” you respond immediately, a frown appearing on your face as you shake your head. “you pretend not to be, but you are, yeonjun. i can see it.”

“you can see it because i wanna be good around you, baby. i wanna be someone good for you.”

tears prick your eyes as a lump forms in your throat, overwhelmed and unsure of how to respond to that. he smiles softly as he takes in your face, leaning forward to press his lips against your forehead. 

he inhales your sweet, vanilla smell while you take in his cologne and faint scent of cigarettes, swallowing down the lump and praying you don’t burst into tears on the spot. 

“don’t doubt yourself, angel,” yeonjun mumbles against your head, puling you closer until your flush against his warm, broad body. “i’m the one who got lucky here.” 

even though it meant wasting away in the fucking library. 

“the library isn’t that bad, yeonjun,” you whine ten minutes later in his car, heat blasting and music low as he drives to the restaurant. one hand’s on the steering wheel while the other’s laced with yours, your body turned in his black leather seat to look over and chastise him. 

he confessed to you that your sessions were the first time he’d ever stepped foot in that library; he hadn’t even been positive that school had a library until he walked through the door that day. 

“it smells like dust and the librarian’s a bitch.”

“she is not!” you squeal, smacking his arm lightly as you throw him a chastising look. “she’s just a little... misunderstood. people don’t respect her space.”

even you can admit sometimes she does go a little overboard; you saw her once lecture a younger student for a half hour because they mistakenly put a book on the wrong shelf. 

“you’re too nice, baby. maybe even a little biased, since you’re the only one she seems to tolerate.”

“probably because i’m there every day,” you tease lightly, your eyes widening playfully before a loud crack of thunder causes you to jump in your seat.

your mom hadn’t been kidding when she said there was gonna be a storm tonight. you’d ran to yeonjun’s car shielding the top of your head, rain pelting down and wind howling as your mom’s “be careful!” got drowned out.

and right now, it only seemed to be getting worse. 

“you scared of thunder?” 

you hear the smirk in yeonjun’s voice and resist the urge to stick your tongue out, not about to admit that, yes, you’re nearly an adult but still terrified of rain and thunder. 

“no, of-of course not,” you grumble, snatching your hand away from his. “it just surprised me.”

yeonjun looks over at you and sees the nervousness all your face, not commenting as he silently snatches your hand back. he intertwines your fingers as he raises your hand to his mouth, pressing his lips against it while he drives through the rain.

it’s getting considerably heavier by every second, his foot pressing off the gas every time he drives past a puddle. 

“i used to be scared of the rain, you know.” 

you look over at him and see him looking peacefully at the road, pink strands of hair hanging in his face. 

“oh, yeah? when you were like five?”

“twelve,” he corrects with a smile, doing his best to distract you from the chaos outside. “i used to wake up crying, sometimes. i know that’s hard to believe now. because i’m so cool and what not.”

“oh please,” you giggle out, the sweet sound filling the car also distracting him from the pounding of rain and crackling of thunder; he’s outgrown his fear of storms but even he can admit this one is a little bit scary right now. 

“what, you don’t think? i’ll have you know-”

the skidding of his tires mixed with your frightened screams is the next thing he hears, a strangled “yeonjun!” in the background as he attempts to take control of his car.

there’s the boom of thunder and lightning and loud blares of horns before everything goes still, his body acting on auto pilot as he safely pulls off on the side of the highway.

his first concern isn’t damage to his car or the heightening storm outside - it’s you in his passenger seat, eyes closed tight and tears on your face. 

“are you okay?” yeonjun’s voice frantically asks, barely able to feel the sensation of his his warm hands on your face. your heart’s pounding and your hands are shaking and for a moment, you thought you were about to die. 

your eyes pop open to meet his and the concern in them only makes your eyes water more, bottom lip trembling as you nod your head. 

but even though you’re nodding he sees you’re not. he sees you trying to catch your breath and your eyes looking back and forth nervously outside.

“hey, hey, angel. it’s okay. i’m here,” he hums lowly, his thumbs running over your face soothingly. “i’m here and you’re okay.”

you attempt to catch and slow your breaths as your eyes never leave his, his only leaving you to quickly assess you for injuries.

“i know that was scary. i’m sorry. i should’ve been more careful.”

“it wasn’t your fault,” you squeak out, swallowing the knot in your throat as you shake your head. your eyes roam his and you pout when there’s guilt and sorrow in his eyes, your own hand snaking down to hold his hand. 

“are you okay?”

his eyes soften as he cups your face and brings you to closer to him, a quiet “yes, baby,” leaving his mouth before he places his lips on your forehead.

you breathe in his scent and he breathes in yours, not allowing himself to pull away until he feels you relax under him.

“i’m gonna drive us to my house, okay?” he says, his eyes back on you looking cautious. “we can order food. i just don’t want us driving in this if it’s gonna get worse.”

you nod your head before reaching down to grasp one of his hands tightly, his small smile meeting you before he carefully pulls back onto the highway. 

the storm gets substantially worse as he makes his way to his house, hand grasping yours tightly as he drives slow and steady. 

he’s flooded with relief when he finally pulls in his driveway, running around the passenger side door to help you out. his hand doesn’t leave the small of your back until you’re in his room, a big space with white walls and black furniture that doesn’t surprise you in the slightest.

contrary to most teenage boy’s rooms, his smells really good. like a mix of his cologne, laundry detergent and a distinct smell you’ve just deemed as his natural scent.

it’s comforting and makes you feel at ease, licking over your lips nervously as you realize this is the first time you’ve been in a boy’s room.

“you want anything to drink?”

“i...i’m good,” you say, sitting on his bed as you look around.

there’s no decor on the walls except for a large flat screen tv across from his bed and above his dresser, a pile of clothes off to the side. 

“sorry, i didn’t expect to have anyone over so it’s a little messy.”

you look over at him sitting beside you, a sheepish smile on his face. you think it’s the first time he’s ever sounded somewhat... nervous and out of his comfort zone. 

maybe because he knows you’ve never been in this situation before. 

“it’s okay, i like your room,” you smile, spreading your fingers out across his soft, dark comforter. “it’s very fitting.”

“oh yeah?” he smirks, inching closer to you and making your heart speed up. “and why’s that?”

there’s that dark playfulness you’re so used to seeing swarming behind his eyes, just as teasing as it is intense that makes you hold back a squeak. he quirks his eyebrow as he moves closer, pink tongue peeking out to roll over his lips.

you can’t help when your eyes fall to them, missing the feel of them on yours. 

you two haven’t gone past making out, a clash of tongues and teeth that have you quietly moaning into his mouth. but when your body acts on its own accord, pushing yourself closer to him or grasping at the bottom of his shirt, he always stops you.

“what are you doin’ baby?”

you were in his car after a tutoring session, the parking lot of the school completely deserted. your cheeks flush and you immediately draw your hands back, lowering your head slightly as embarrassment took over. 

“i...i thought that was...don’t you wanna...”

because clothes come off, that’s how it starts - you know that much.

and you can feel how much he wants to go further, the hardness under you that scared you at first now the thing begging you to go further.

you feel wanted and desired and even though you’re scared, you want to go further.

“we don’t have to do anything, baby. this is fine,” he says softly, his hand reaching up to cup your cheek. 

“but i want to,” you mumble, not even sure if he can hear your words because of how quiet you are. 

you know he must though because he draws his fingers under your chin to lift your face, eyes heavy of fondness and arousal making your stomach flutter more. 

your first instinct is to assume he doesn’t want you - why else would he stop you? but you can see in his eyes that he does...right? because it really does look like that.

what other reason would he have to stop you though? maybe he just doesn’t-

“whatever you’re thinking is probably wrong,” yeonjun mutters, tightening his hold on you and bringing you closer to him. “i don’t wanna go further with you while we’re in the car, angel. you deserve more than that.”

“hm?” you hear him hum, ripping you from your memories. 

you look from his lips to his eyes watching you with lust, the beginnings of your nonsense words cut off when he kisses you. 

your heart flutters and stomach swoops immediately, kissing back with an embarrassing amount of fervor. he smirks against your lips as he pulls you on his lap, your arms circling around his shoulders.

his tongue traces your bottom lip before you feel it in your mouth, daringly meeting his back in a way you’d never done before. it causes him to bring his hands to your hips, squeezing and massaging them with his large hands. 

“look at you,” he mutters almost condescendingly, falling back onto his bed and causing you to squeal. you’re holding yourself above him and his eyebrow is quirked, red lips puffy and pink hair messy causing your heart to flutter mercilessly.

“if i didn’t know any better, baby, i’d think you’re real eager tonight.”

you bite down on your lip as you adjust yourself on him, your hips straddling his and brushing over him. your building heat is right under him and it takes everything in you not to moan at just the thought, his hands strong and firm.

and just as you’re about to answer, tell him that, yes, even though you’re not familiar with.... any of this, you’re eager and ready, your stomach growls and ruins the moment.

it causes a smile to light up his face, a deep chuckle leaving him before he flips you over. he’s hovering above you now, no parts of your bodies touching except for his hand a few inches away from your head. 

“or you’re hunger, my mistake, angel,” he says with a smirk, pressing a peck to your nose sweetly. “what do you want?”

you spend the next hour laying in his bed waiting for the pizza, the storm just as wild outside as it was when you were in the car. you bit down on a squeal threatening to leave your mouth every time there was a terrifying boom, your body shimming closer to yeonjun’s.

he smiled against your head and welcomed your body closer, bringing your head to his chest.

“you’re cute,” you hear him mumble, the swooping in your stomach causing you to feel warm.

you look up at him and smile shyly, tucking your head closer into his chest. you have to hide your growing smile when you feel his lips brush your head, deep content hums leaving his chest.

the doorbell ringing rips you two apart, his mumbled “i’ll be right back,’ causing you to sit up. you brush your fingers through your hair as you sit up, looking around his dark room and feeling something brewing in your stomach.

you feel every bit as nervous as you do excited and eager in his room with him right now. 

it’s still scary because you’re new to this. because you’ve never done anything like this before and you know you don’t know what you’re doing. 

but a part of you wants to kiss him on his bed. go further than he’s allowed you to because if he only didn’t want to be with you in the car, this should solve that problem, right?

you’ve never felt as desired and warm as you have with him these past months. no one’s ever looked at you the way he does or have made you feel the way he does. 

you’re usually too scared or uneasy to talk to people or form a connection; but from the moment you met him, you were able to do that. a part of you just felt inclined to help him, be a person that he knows would be there for him even if it meant in the form of helping him study or motivate him.

you never would’ve expected for him to reciprocate your feelings. nor would you have expected to be in this current situation, want and need bubbling in your stomach at the thought of yeonjun doing-

“pizza’s here,” yeonjun says, popping his head through the door holding a box of pizza. 

you smile upon seeing it, your stomach growling at the smell; if he hears it, he doesn’t say anything. just walks over and places the box on his bed, offering you a slice that you take immediately.

“thank you,” you squeak, bringing the food to your mouth.

he watches you for a few seconds, suddenly all too aware of him looking at you. you raise an eyebrow as you chew, a shy look coming over your face that causes him to smile. 

“what?”

“nothing,” he says, shaking his head as he takes out his own slice. “my mom called me and said they can’t come home tonight because of the storm.”

you take the time to chew your food as you take in his words, the fluttering in your stomach a mix of nerves and excitement. 

“oh.”

“yeah...” he hums, his eyes roaming your face; he doesn’t want his next suggestion to make you uncomfortable but he also thinks it would be best. for both of you. 

“and i don’t know if i should drive you home, angel. it’s supposed to get really bad. do you... wanna stay over?”

there’s a lump in your throat for all the reasons there shouldn’t be. 

not because this is your first time sleeping over a boy’s house or the fact that his parents aren’t home. or because you’re gonna have to call your mom and say you’re sleeping over a friend’s house.

or even because you don’t know what to expect tonight.

it’s only there because you know, in a new form of acting on your deeper desires and not suppressing yourself to just being some innocent girl, you wanna get railed.

“i... i guess i can do that,” you say, some nervousness still behind your voice because when it comes down to it, you’re unfamiliar with this situation. 

“well yeah, but do you want to, baby?” he asks with a small smirk, his hand reaching up to toy with your hair. 

his long fingers run through the strands before tucking them behind your ear, his hand slinking down to rest on your neck.

“if you don’t feel comfortable, i’ll take you home later,” he says, thumb running across your skin slowly. breath catches in your throat when he leans closer to you, his lingering scent and broadness causing you to bite down on your lip.

“i just thought it’d be nice to lay with you tonight. or wake up with you.”

“or let us go further since we’re not in the car.” 

you don’t know who’s more shocked by your words but you know you’re definitely more embarrassed, a rampant blush crossing your cheeks as you attempt to hide in his shoulder.

he’s quick to pull you away with a small “tsk,” the smirk on his lips quickly widening despite the soft look in his eyes. 

you bite back the noise threatening to leave your mouth when he wraps his hand around you hair, the slightest of stings ripping through your scalp when he pulls you forward.

“go further?” he asks lowly, his eyes peering down at you only making you feel more warm and flustered. 

words are caught in your mouth and you can’t find it in you to say anything. not only because you’re too embarrassed but you don’t even know what to say.

you know you want more than kissing and that there’s always a building pressure between your legs when he pulls you on his lap. 

you know on more than one occasion, you’ve wanted his hands that’d rest on your hips to go just a little further down. slip in the waistband of your pants and meet the wetness and heat through your underwear.

you’ve wanted to see his pink hair between your legs as you experience getting eaten out of the first time, holding back moans in the crease of your elbow as his tongue explores every inch of you. 

you know you want to look up at him with tears in your eyes and a heaving chest, ask if you can please suck him off because you’ve also never done that before. 

he can see the arousal and lust clouding your eyes the more the silence elapses, his cock quickly hardening as he takes in the sight of you on his bed ready for him to take you. 

it’s just a matter of how and when he’s gonna. how and when you tell him like the good girl he knows you are. 

“how much further are you thinking, angel?” his deep voice finally asks, successfully breaking the silence and building the thick tension. 

you let out a breathy exhale when he pushes you on your back, the knot in your stomach tightening as he looks down at your body. 

“what do you want me to do, huh?” he asks, the smirk and feeling in his chest growing when he sees you start to breathe heavily on his bed. your legs are nearly shaking from the build up in pressure, your tongue licking over your dry lips. 

“i... yeonjun...”

he bites back the groan threatening to leave his mouth at you moaning his name, holding himself above your body as he hand spays out against your stomach. 

“why are you moaning my name baby? i haven’t even done anything.”

“but... but i want you to. so bad.”

your voice is whiny and pathetic but it’s all it takes for him to snap, his hand moving from your stomach to between your legs. 

he can feel the heat and pulse of your pussy and has to suppress his own groan again, completely getting off on the feeling that you, the innocent little tutor he’s been wanting to ruin since he saw you last year, is laid out on his bed and dripping just for him. 

“please, yeonjun,” you whine again, completely out of your mind with lust when you feel his hand on you. 

he bites down on his lip before he starts gently running his hand over you, barely putting any pressure on you. he’s just relishing in the how only that makes you spread your legs immediately, hips bucking up closer to his hand. 

he pulls his hand away and pins your hips to the bed, his face hovering above yours before you can even whine again. 

“be patient, angel. or this isn’t gonna work,” he growls lowly, his thumbs running over your pants gently. 

“i- i’m sorry,” you gasp out, tears pricking your eyes because this feeling is so new and foreign and overwhelming. “i just... i’m so...”

“you’re so what?”

“i want you,” you say immediately, thinking back to your conversation with him outside of soobin’s house. when the words you’re telling him now are the same ones he told you. “i want you more than you know.”

a scoff leaves his mouth when you say that, remembering those words leaving his own mouth that night.

but the difference here is, he thinks, is that you really didn’t know that.

you didn’t know how just sitting there and smiling at him and talking to him so sweetly was making him want you. your soft smiles and vanilla scent and the wide-eyed look you’d always innocently give him.

but he’s aware of how much you want him, in this moment. he can feel it, smell it, see it. he knows just how much you want him because he wants you the same way. 

your pants and underwear are off in one shot, a gasp leaving your mouth when you realize you’re completely bare in front of him. 

he’s quick to look at your face to see if you’re okay, that teary wide-eyed look and teeth sinking in your lip greeting him; another whiney and mumbled “touch me,” leaves your mouth before he can ask.

a smile lights up his face that makes your heart jump even through this all, a teasing look in his eye even through the arousal and painful hardness in his pants.

“say please, angel.”

“please touch me, yeonjun. please.”

his fingers are on your clit right after the words leave you, your mouth hanging open and legs spreading when you’re immediately filed with a sense of some relief. 

“you’re so wet for me, angel. how long have you wanted this, huh?”

you babble out something you can’t even hear through your pounding ears but it must be something good and polite enough because you feel a finger enter you a few seconds later.

he hisses at the tightness around his finger and has to remember to be gentle with you, fingering you slowly and sweetly as he toys at your clit. 

“you’re doing so good, baby. so good for me.”

you cry out a moan that has his fingers moving quicker, curling them just right before you scream out his name; you’ve never ever felt anything like this before.

“yeonjun, oh, my god.”

“i know, baby, it’s okay,” he says, allowing his fingers to work over you and in you for a few seconds before he forces himself to remove them. your head shoots up and the sight almost makes him smile, a frustrated look in your teary eyes that has him cocking his head.

“why did you-”

the fingers just inside you are below your chin, the slickness of his fingers on your skin making you widen your eyes. is that... is he about to make you...

you hold back another moan when you watch him raise his fingers to his own mouth, his eyes rolling back when he tastes you. you don’t know if you’re a little grossed out or even more turned on but you think it must be the latter if the way your legs start to shake again and your lower stomach tightens. 

“you taste so fucking sweet, angel. can i eat your pussy?”

he could tell how scared you were when you first got here, not seeing a hint of that fear now but still needing to check before he pulls you on his face and has his way with you.

“y-yes, please, yeonjun, oh my-”

you can’t even get the words out before his hands are taking off your shirt, removing the straps of your bra and pushing them down until your boobs pop out. 

perky nipples spring into the air and he can’t stop the groan that leaves him, circling his tongue around each of them before he tells you to unhook it. your eyes meet his for just a few seconds before you reach out to take it off, quickly throwing it on the floor before you, without thinking, cover yourself. 

his eyes flash and he immediately snaps out of his trance, placing his hands on your arms but not attempting to move them. 

“what are you doing, angel?”

and it’s at this moment, something as silly as him seeing your chest completely naked, that you’re feeling insecure. 

you know he’s been with girls before this, college girls who definitely have bigger boobs than you and know what they’re doing. girls who are prettier and sexier and don’t blush or whine at the slightest hint of his touch of them. 

“i... i know you’ve been with prettier girls before. an-and i don’t think they’re that nice.”

“angel, i don’t know if i’ve gotten this across enough but you’re the most beautiful girl i’ve ever met,” he says, the sweetest words to ever leave his mouth not even making him blink.

because he needs you to know in this moment that you are. he can’t stand the insecure, fearful look in your eye that he’s not gonna find you desirable because you’re comparing yourself to other people. 

“that’s a lie,” you weakly mumble out, tears stinging your eyes because this is so stupid. now you’re ruining the moment and he’s not gonna wanna do this with you. you’re proving just how inexperienced and unfamiliar you are with-

“i don’t lie.”

your eyebrow raises and he can’t help but smirk, the realization that your whole relationship started off lying to your teacher making him let out a deep chuckle. 

“i mean i don’t lie to you, angel, i would never lie to you,” he says, reaching down to press a long kiss on your lips. it’s the most intimate kiss you’ve ever had with him, mouths parting on one another like you’re trying to get all your worries and reassurances out on one another.

him that you’re just as desirable as he knows you are and you that you really don’t know what you’re doing but you wanna do this with him. 

“you’re beautiful, baby, and if anyone’s not worthy of the other, it’s me.”

his words make your eyebrows pull together, the look in his eye one you’ve never seen before. probably the most vulnerable and honest you’ve seen him look at you. 

“but i’m gonna do my best to be, angel, so please... don’t think that,” he says, pulling your arms away from your chest. 

he feels relief flood through him when you allow him to do say, his head dipping again to place small pecks on your chest before taking another nipple in his mouth. 

he moans around you at the same time you do, throwing your head back against his pillow. your fingers lace through the back of his pink hair and you feel your pussy clenching around nothing, moaning out his name when his tongue carefully and slowly licks around the other neglected one. 

“you also have the sweetest pussy i’ve ever tasted,” he mumbles around your nipple, swirling his tongue around it one more time before grabbing your hips and throwing himself on his back. 

“so sit on my face, angel. now.”

you have no time to feel hesitant or insecure because, one, he pulls you up before you can do anything else and two, you’re far too eager to feel this for the first time. 

his tongue latching onto your clit causes you to moan out his name, trying your best to not buck your hips against his face. but his tongue feels like it’s everywhere, flicking at it your clit and up inside you and quickly making your legs shake around him. 

your hazy eyes look down and you see his own looking up at you, a hot arousal in them as you cover the rest of his face with your body. pink strands stick to his forehead and you bite down on your lip so you don’t scream, your eyes rolling back when he eats you out like a man starved.

he’s moaning against you and pulling you closer to his face, your hips bucking into his mouth as you whine out his name over and over. 

you’re so out of it and dazed with arousal and need that you don’t even think twice when an idea pops into your head. 

you buck your hips a tad harder than usual that he disconnects his mouth from you, about to ask if he hurt you somehow before you flip over on his face. your body leans over his stomach until your mouth is by the tight groin of his sweatpants, clumsily slipping down his boxers until his cock springs free.

it’s hard and red and looks completely neglected, screaming to be relieved by you.

so even though you have no idea what you’re doing, only guided by works of fiction and things you hear in the hallway, you wrap your mouth around the head of his cock.

you hear him growl at your name but only continue to suck him off, your tongue circling around him as your mouth moves up and down. you smile when he moans against your pussy just so moan around his a few seconds later, like he knew you were smiling against him at hearing that noise leave him.

he didn’t think he could get any harder than he already was but you continue to impress him and prove him wrong, his mouth working quicker on you to aid in his growing arousal. 

a loud moan of your name leaves his mouth when you deep throat him, a growled “fuck,” against your wetness that makes you whine against him. 

“i wanna fuck your mouth so badly,” he growls against you, wrapping his tongue around your clit just as you let out a strangled “please.” but he only shakes his head and continues his vigorous assault, sticking two fingers inside you that causes your scream to be muffled around his cock.

“you’re gonna come first, angel. i want you to come on my fucking face.”

and even though he already seemed to know it from the moment he met you, he sees that what he wants from you, he’s always gonna get. 

your lower stomach tightens before a feeling of euphoria consumes you, your legs shaking and hips bucking before an orgasm rips right through you. your head is leant against his head as you try to catch your breath, whining slightly when he pulls you off of him.

he lays you down gently on the bed before placing a kiss to your cheek. 

“you did so good, angel. how do you feel?”

“mmm.. that was the best thing i’ve ever felt.”

a deep laugh leaves him at your sleepy, dazed look, taking his shirt off so he can dab at your wet legs. you wince a little at the sensitivity and he mumbles an apology, laying on his back and opening his arms to you.

“lay with me, baby.”

a small smile crosses your face as you fall into his bare chest, sighing contently with your head resting over his chest. you can hear his heartbeat against your ear and feel his lips against your head, his fingers running over your arm slowly.

you’ve never been more comfortable and at ease than you are in this moment. even with the storm raging outside and the unknown parts of your relationship still coming, you feel happy. 

happy and safe and so stupidly content.  

“angel?”

you look up at him when you hear his voice break the silence, your chin against his chest as you meet his gaze. 

he smiles upon seeing you, his hand coming up to pat down your messy hair. 

“i like you. a lot.”

you bite down on your lip to hide your growing smile, daringly taking the first move to press a sweet peck on his lips.

“i like you, too. a lot, a lot,” you giggle out, the pink on your cheeks making his heart squeeze in his chest. “but i think you already knew that.”

“i was hoping,” he hums lowly, bringing you back into his chest. you smile against him as you inhale his scent, moving your body closer to him until you feel your leg hit a hard, fleshy piece of skin. 

your eyes widen and pulse quickens when you see he’s still hard and aching, the content look on his face completely disregarding it. 

“yeonjun...” you mumble, shamelessly staring at his dick a few inches from your leg. 

he peeks an eye open and sees you staring down at it, a sheepish smile crossing his face; he looks a tad embarrassed and you shouldn’t find it as endearing as you do. 

“sorry. it’ll go down eventually.”

eventually being when he gets up to go to the bathroom and jerks himself off. because there’s no way in hell he’s gonna go flaccid with you all naked and cuddled against him.

“you mean you’re not gonna fuck me?”

his eyes widen and cock twitches when those words leave your mouth, his hand falling to your jaw so you can look at him. his eyes roam your face when he sees the heavy desire building in your wide-eyed gaze, the perfect contrast of sweet and lustful that has him holding back a groan. 

“where did you learn to talk like this?” he hums lowly in your ear. 

you smirk against him before you bring your hand up to his mouth, his eyes searching yours. but you’re only staring back just as intensely, rubbing yourself against his leaking cock laying between you. 

“spit on it, please.”

he can’t even stop his groan from leaving him this time, painfully hard and ready to bust. you learned so fast what he likes and that’s when you’re both polite and eager.

“baby girl,” he moans, bringing his face down to place a messy, dominating kiss on yours. he pulls your mouths apart after allowing his tongue to explore your mouth, a string of spit connecting your lips. 

his eyes fall to your mouth before he’s tipping your head back, your hand clutching onto his shoulder and tightening when, suddenly, he spits in your mouth. 

your eyes widen but he smirks before you can say anything, wordlessly bringing your hand to his mouth and spitting on it as you so requested. you let out a shaky sigh, eyeing him warily before he gives you a nod.

it’s only then that you wrap your hand around his cock, watching as his eyes flutter shut and he leans his head back. 

“there u go, angel,” he hums lowly, your hand twisting over the tip before exploring down. 

he can feel your hesitance and unsureness but it only makes it that much more enjoyable for him, knowing this is the first time you’ve done this - although he does wonder how you knew to spit on it first. 

his words spur you on and you wet your hand again, twisting and turning on every ridge of his cock. his moans of your name cause wetness to gather between your legs, your eyes meeting his to see them right on you.

“please fuck me, yeonjun.”

you didn’t have to ask him twice before he pushed you on your back. he fumbled to take his sweatpants off fully, discarding them on the floor before pulling you toward the end of bed.

you look down at him with furrowed eyebrows before a loud gasp leaves you, his mouth back on your pussy before he slides two fingers in. he preps you again until you’re coming around him, his mouth hot around you while his fingers are curled and relentless.

“p-please, yeonjun. i wanna- feel you.”

“and you will, angel, i promise,” he says, pressing one last kiss to your swollen, wet clit before going up to your face. “you’ve never done this before, right?”

he knows it and you know it but he still needs to ask. needs to know he’s gonna be the first person to take you and ruin you. 

“no,” you immediately respond, shaking your head as tears well up in your eyes. 

he responds by smiling, placing one last long kiss on your mouth before cupping your face gently.

“it might hurt, okay? i’ll go as slow as you need.”

you nod your head as you relax on your back, looking down to see him positioning himself between your legs. he swirls the tip of his dick around your wet clit and opening, watching as your dripping hole tries to suck him in.

“holy fuck,” he growls out, “you’re so wet, baby. it’s gonna feel so fucking good.”

you whine unintelligible words but he knows to just soothe you. bring his hand to your waist and rub slowly as he promises to be in you soon.

the stretch at first in painful and unfamiliar, your face pulled into a grimace despite the deep groan leaving him.

“oh, angel,” he growls lowly, his dark eyes meeting yours to see your face twisted in pain. “are you okay? does it hurt?”

“y-yes, but it’s okay. just... slow,” you say quietly, nodding your head reassuringly. 

he hovers over your face as he inches himself in further and further, your breaths shaky and body tense as the pain worsens. 

“i’m sorry, baby, you’re doing so good.”

you nod your head and he kisses away the tears, a sigh of relief leaving you when he stops moving. he’s still inside you for a few seconds, allowing your tight walls to adjust around him before he starts moving.

it takes a few thrusts for the burning pain to subside, replaced by a full, warm feeling that had you moaning quietly into the air. 

“does it feel good now, baby?” you hear yeonjun ask, his thrusts speeding up as his body lays over you. “do you like my cock in you?”

“y-yes,” you mumble out, throwing your legs around his waist. 

he growls lowly as he starts fucking into you, keeping his pace steady and just hard enough to make you lose your mind; because he doesn’t wanna hurt you but you also feel so good, he can’t help but chase after his orgasm.

“tell me you’re mine.”

“i-i’m yours, yeonjun,” you whimper out, his hand coming down to your clit making you cry out again. “i’m yours. yours, yours, yours,” you repeat dumbly, having no sense of control over yourself as an immense pleasure builds inside you. 

he thrusts into you hitting a certain spot that has a scream leaving your mouth, a sadistic smirk on his face.

“that’s right, angel. you’re mine. you’ve been mine ever since i saw you last year,” he growls lowly, remembering the first time he saw you and knew you were gonna somehow effect him like this. 

“i wanted to ruin you then, baby, because i knew you’d be mine.”

“yeonjun,” you whine, thrusting your hips into him at his words. remembering all the times he caught you staring at him. all the times you’d watch him and thought about how handsome he was.

how someone like him would never want someone like you. 

but he wants you and you want him and it’s still something you can’t quite believe. you know you’re both different but it seems to be something that works, him bringing you out of your comfort zone and you making him wanna be someone better.

“i’m gonna come, angel,” he grunts out, “i’m gonna fucking come. come with me.”

you feel the knot in your stomach unravel before you’re both moaning each other’s names, chests heaving and his breathing harsh as he holds himself lazily above you. 

he drops his head into the crook of your neck, attempting to catch his breath despite the feeling of your post orgasm spazzing around him.

the pounding takes a few seconds to subside, a final moan leaving him before he pulls out of you. 

he’s quick to collapse onto his back, hanging his arm off the bed lazily as he searches for his shirt. 

he cleans you up a few moments later, watching you with a small smile before he pulls you down onto him again.

“how was that?” he mumbles quietly, his eyes closed and head resting atop yours. 

“really good,” you mumble back, your own eyes closed as you attempt to catch your breath. you still feel a little sticky but it’s not something you mind in this moment, your post orgasm daze leaving you content. 

it could be the post orgasm daze making you say the next words that leave your mouth. on such a high of emotions and endorphins and utter contentment that the warm feeling in your chest if confused.

or maybe it’s the months of getting to know the boy beside you who had such a bad reputation. who you were terrified of at first and thought was mean an scary, thought for sure he was gonna find you weird and nerdy.

but you’ve never felt more wanted or desired by another person. no one’s ever looked at you the way he’s looked at you before or made you feel the way he’s made you feel. 

“i... i think i love you, yeonjun.”

love had always scared yeonjun and especially hearing a confession like that after sex - it had always been his worst nightmare and, truthfully, an embarrassing moment.

but he’s never felt as listened to and comforted by someone else ever in his life before. someone who, from the second he met them, trusted him and thought of him to be good and smart and capable. 

he didn’t know why and he didn’t know what he did for you to think of him that way but he knows he’s never gonna take it for granted. because from the second he saw you, he really did know you were gonna be his.

“i think i might love you, too, angel.”

[syllvane]

home- yelena belova x reader

a/n: wrote this whole thing in about an hour, black widow spoilers obviously!

Yelena doesn’t know what home means.

For a time, it meant Ohio, a life with her sister and her parents. It meant playgrounds and mac n cheese and American Pie.

For much longer, it was blades and guns and a ledger soaked with red.

Now, it was you. It was taking her coffee the exact way you took it so that you could reach over and take a sip of her mug when you didn’t think she was looking. It was the way you woke up every time she woke up from a nightmare, always being there to reassure her that she was still in control, that the Red Room was gone. It was the little sticky notes the two of you left around the apartment, the little reminders of your love.

It was home, at least until you had woken up one day to a pile of dust next to you instead of your girlfriend.

You didn’t know what it had meant- why would you have? You thought maybe that she had accidentally burned breakfast maybe or that there was a hole in your ceiling. You thought of everything except what had actually had happened.

The apartment changes slowly, as you and the world around you realize that this is permanent. That this is a nightmare you won’t wake up from.

You can’t even remember the last words the two of you said to each other- ‘I love you’, probably, or maybe discussing the next day, time you didn’t realize the two of you didn’t have.

You reach out to Natasha and when you tell her, you see your own grief mirrored on her face- in her defense though, she doesn’t start bawling as you had.

Her grief is stoic and stray tears. Yours is sobbing and nightmares, waking up and reaching over to the other side of the bed for someone who isn’t there.

You don’t think you’ll ever get the feeling of her ashes off of your fingers.

Five years pass slowly, dragging you and everyone else who was desperately clinging to the past along with it.

You help dissolve what is left of the Black Widow agents, giving them the freedom that Yelena had always longed to give them.

You vow that Yelena’s mission won’t die with her.

You’re making dinner when you hear footsteps coming from your bedroom.

You grab the gun that Yelena always kept behind the pots, turning around and pointing only to see the woman herself standing there, taking in everything.

She faltered for a second before smiling.

“Is it a crime to oversleep now?” Yelena asked, her eyes never leaving yours.

She looks exactly like you remember her.

“You can’t be real.”

“If that’s the start of some cheesy pick-up line, I am going to walk out of that door,” She said, although there was no real threat behind the words. You set the gun down.

She could be a stray Widow, luring you into comfort before ultimately killing you.

At that moment though, you don’t really care.

It’s been five long years and you are tired and so you run over to where she is standing and you hug her tightly as if she will simply disappear through your hands again.

“Woah! What’s the occasion? Is it our anniversary or something, is that why you were holding the gun?” She asked and you didn’t respond.

“It’s you,” You said, tucking your face into her shoulder. “You’re back.”

Yelena pulled a face, not that you saw.

“Back? Where did I go?”

That was genuine confusion in her voice- she had no idea that she and half of the Earth’s population had disappeared for five years.

“Just don’t go there again, please. Just don’t go where I can’t follow.”

She doesn’t say anything- she doesn’t fully understand why you’re sobbing into her neck, but that doesn’t matter right now.

There will be plenty of time to talk about it afterwards but for now, she does one of the things she’s always been best at and she just holds you.

The excitement of Yelena returning is overshadowed a few days later by the news of Natasha’s death.

“We won’t… we won’t even have a body to bury,” Yelena said, her eyes welling up with tears as you held her, and you are reminded of your own grief in the first couple days after she had disappeared.

This time though, you do not cry.

You wanted to- Natasha had become one of your closest friends in the five years that you had lost Yelena. Your loss bound the two of you together in ways you hadn’t thought possible.

You wanted to and you do not because this is Yelena’s grief first and foremost and it is yours second.

You will not cry in front of a woman who has just lost her sister. Instead, you will hold her close and you will tell her stories of her sister from the past five years, five years that you had refused to speak about.

“She loved you so much, Yelena. She wasn’t the best at showing it, but she loved you so much.”

“Then why didn’t she stay?” Yelena asked, her voice breaking as she started crying again.

You didn’t answer, mostly because you didn’t have a good reason.

Clint Barton had told you over the phone that one of their lives had to be sacrificed and that Natasha gave her life so that he could return to his family.

That was all perfectly well and nice, but you wanted to scream at him: What about us? What about Yelena? What about Melina, Alexei? What about her family?

You didn’t though. He would have to live with her death for the rest of his life, knowing that he was only alive because she wasn’t. Maybe that would have to be enough.

“Cause she’s a hero. I don’t know. I know it’s selfish, but I need you to promise me something. Promise me that if the world needs saving and it’s your life on the line, you’ll turn around and come home to me,” You said, running your hands through her hair. “The world can burn for all I care. I just need you safe.”

“I promise. No going where you can’t follow,” She replied, repeating your words from the first night that she had returned.

There is no body to bury but there is still a funeral, still a gravestone to visit.

“I don’t want to go alone,” Yelena said, straightening the hem of her shirt in the mirror.

“You won’t be,” You promised her and she took your hand and the two of you drove to the cemetery.

Her grave was recognizable- it was covered with flowers and stuffed bears and candles.

She was renowned by so many and grieved by many more, though none as much as the two of you.

Yelena doesn’t know how to approach it- she froze when she saw it, rooted to the ground.

“I don’t think I can do this,” She said, her voice barely a whisper. “Not yet.”

“Okay. We can stay as long as you want.”

She grabbed your hand and you held on tightly.

“Don’t leave me.”

“Never.”

The two of you look at the other gravestones for about an hour before Yelena finally garners up the courage to go to Natasha’s.

She kneeled, setting the flowers down gently among the others. She seemed to freeze for another moment before her fingers began tracing a word on the gravestone: ‘sister’.

Her hand clapped over her mouth and she leaned back.

You sat next to her as she started crying again, your hand finding hers again.

Yelena didn’t know what home meant for the longest time- it was deception and Russian taught in secret and filling scrapbooks with memories manufactured in one day.

It was scalpels and guns and dead bodies and broken bones and targets. It was sniper rifles and explosives.

It was sitting at her sister's gravestone with your hand in hers, sitting with her until dusk, crying. It was waking up to your nightmares, you holding her tightly until you stopped crying, realizing that she was still here.

It was Natasha’s red hair and her fighting poses and it was your smile and laugh.

It was grief and love, it was her sister and it was you.

[mercurygguk]

him after all (m) | pjm

➵ summary; a guy you’ve never met before scoops in and saves you from a very embarrassing situation and you can’t help but notice how cute he is.

(based on this prompt)

pairing; jimin x f. reader

final word count; 17,176 (sorry y’all)

rating; 18+

content; strangers to lovers au, fluff/angst/smut, infidelity, multiple appearances from jjk, oc’s boyfriend being nasty and stupid af

warnings; swearing, making out, smut; dom!jimin, nipple play, fingering, oral sex (f. receiving), protected sex, multiple orgasms, dirty talk, light choking, orgasm denial, oc begging for jimin’s dick bc it’s just so good

a/n; i am SO sorry for this long ass wait after promising to post the other day, but here it is, y’all!! i hope you like it, i’m actually pretty proud of it myself so yeah, please let me know what you think, thanks!! ps. please ignore any typos if you see some lol

This is so embarrassing.

You want to shrink into your seat as you pray that a deep, black hole will appear and swallow you whole after telling the waitress to give you a few more minutes to decide your order. The problem is that you have no idea if a few more minutes will be enough or if you should just get up and get the walk of shame over with. It’s obvious to the other restaurant guests around you that you’re waiting for someone and have been for the past hour or so. You stopped checking the time after 28 minutes. You’ve quite literally never felt so embarrassed before. The pitying looks you’re receiving, the apologetic eyes of strangers as if they know what situation you’re currently finding yourself in. It’s only making it worse and you feel stupid for thinking your busy boyfriend, Seokmin, would be able to find time for you just this one evening. You take the last sip of your red wine and collect your purse to get ready to leave.

The waitress reappears, a polite yet sad smile on her face as she asks you once again if you’re ready to order. You can tell she’s well aware of what you’re going through at the moment.

“I’d just like the bill for the glass of wine, please,” you tell her, voice small. Just as the waitress is about to leave to get the bill, a person gets into the seat across the table. You look up, eyes wide in surprise as you look at the stranger.

“Sorry for being so late, babe, traffic is hectic right now,” the stranger says loudly to make sure everyone who has been giving you pitying looks hears him. You glance around, noticing how people start to mind their own business right away and how the waitress turns to leave the two of you alone, but not before giving the guy in front of you a nasty look. Turning back to the stranger with dirty-blonde hair, you watch confusingly as he leans closer, voice low as he says; “I’m Jimin. Just go with it, yeah? Whoever didn’t bother to show up is a dick.”

A small smile appears on your face at his words. He offers you a small smile in return as he sits back in his seat, grabbing the menu to figure out what to eat. This man you’ve never met came to your rescue and saved you from an embarrassing situation and you can’t help but grin as you grab your own menu, eyes skimming the options you have.

“____,” you suddenly speak up causing Jimin to look up at you, his eyes shimmering in the dim light of the restaurant. He nods in response, smirking softly before returning to the menu. As he ponders over what to order, you take the chance to take a good look at him. His dirty-blonde hair is swept back and parted in the middle, a small nose and big, plush lips that kind of reminds you of pink rose petals. There’s earrings adorning his earlobes and a delicate chain necklace around his neck, softly grazing his collarbones that are visible due to the rounded neck of his white t-shirt worn underneath a black blazer. His features cause him to look so soft and kind yet so flirtatious and like he knows how gorgeous he is. He must, by far, be the most handsome man you’ve ever seen. You feel slightly intimidated by it to be honest.

“It’s nice to meet you, ____,” Jimin then proceeds to say, placing the menu down, “I say we order a bottle of wine, yes?”

You nod immediately. “Sounds perfect,” you quip, the tone of your voice a tiny bit higher than before. 

Jimin smirks before calling the waitress over. You watch as he speaks to the waitress, a charming smile on his face as she writes down everything he’s planning on ordering. “A bottle of your best red wine, please,” he says, “a steak for me and for you, babe?”

This stranger who’s your date for the night glances at you, the same charming smile still on his face as he awaits your answer. You hesitate for a second, slightly distracted by the way the word ‘babe’ rolls off his tongue so confidently when talking to you, his lips curled into a smirking smile when he speaks. When you don’t give an answer right away, he lifts a single eyebrow as if to urge you on. 

“Oh, uh, the same for me, please,” you finally manage to say, not missing the way Jimin lets out a small chuckle. Did he notice you being completely distracted because of him calling you ‘babe’ for the second time since he sat down? Are you, once again, making a complete fool of yourself? What kind of messed up day is this? God, why is it so hot in this damn restaurant?

“Hey, you okay?” Jimin suddenly asks as soon as the waitress leaves you alone again. You notice the way his eyes show concern and yet a hint of amusement as well, his lips now turning into a small frown instead of the charming smile he was sporting just a few seconds ago. You can’t tell if it’s a teasing kind of frown or a genuine one. You decide it’s the former when he speaks up again before you get to answer his question. “You seem a little… flushed.”

Oh. My. God.

The air in Jimin’s car is suffocating, hot and filled with tension. So much tension you could practically cut through it with a knife. Jimin hadn’t exactly planned for this to happen when he scooped into the seat across from you after seeing you sitting by yourself for too long. He had noticed how you had been checking the watch on your wrist several times in the short amount of time he was watching you. So as the gentleman that he is, Jimin came to your rescue and scooped right in, saving you from a clearly embarrassing situation. Also, you’re really, really pretty ergo he simply couldn’t hold himself back.

But as your lips connect with his, tongues clashing and hands roaming each other’s bodies, he rethinks the whole situation and how messed up it actually is. You were clearly waiting for someone when he volunteered to be your date for the night. You hadn’t mentioned who throughout the date the two of you had nor did you ever receive a call or text of some sort from the person who had so rudely stood you up. Jimin saw a chance to save a pretty girl from an uncomfortable situation and took it. What he didn’t expect was that you’d end up in his lap in his car, grinding against him so deliciously that his mind was slowly fogging up and turning into mush.

Your mind and vision is clouded by the feeling of Jimin’s body pressed against you, the only thing on your mind is him and the fact that you’ve never made out like this with anyone before. Your hands move on their own as they cup Jimin’s face, pulling him in closer as if possible before moving on further up to his hair, tugging softly. Jimin grunts in response as his hands slide down your back to your waist and further down to grab your ass and give it a squeeze. A delicate moan tumbles from your mouth and into his own causing Jimin to slowly realize what’s actually happening in this very moment. You whine softly as he starts to slow down, his lips becoming softer and less rough on yours. His hands move back up to rest upon your hips as you kiss softly, the soft kisses turning into small, barely-there pecks. Jimin lets his head fall back against the headrest, eyes still closed as he tries to catch his breath. You’re seated in his lap, head dropping to rest against his chest and palms resting on his shoulders, your breathing ragged as you sit in silence, not entirely sure what to say after what just unfolded.

“I- uh,” you begin, searching your mind for words as you lift your head to look at Jimin. He’s smiling at you, letting out a laugh because this situation you’ve gotten yourselves into is quite amusing once you think about it, but still very messed up. You furrow your eyebrows at him, feeling a smile appear on your lips as you let his laugh spark a glee in you, “what?”

“Nothing,” he shakes his head. He reaches up, moving a strand of hair from your face and placing it behind your ear. It’s a very intimate move and yet you don’t find yourself moving away from his tender touch. “I’d like to take you out for real sometime,” the blonde suddenly says, causing your smile to falter a bit.

Oh.

“If you want to, of course,” he then quickly adds, half-smiling at you, “if not, that’s okay. Just thought I’d ask.”

Smiling, you cup his cheek carefully, your thumb running over his plump bottom lip. You move your eyes from his lips to his dark brown ones, giving him an answer before letting the thoughts of your boyfriend consume you. He’s pushed to the far back of your mind when you give a vague answer to Jimin’s offer even though you know it’s wrong.

“I’ll think about it.”

Jimin drops you off that night, giving you his number and receiving yours as well before you get out of his car. When you step out and head for the front door, you notice that the lights in your apartment are still turned off, the darkness indicating that no one was home yet. You sigh deeply, glancing back at Jimin’s car before letting yourself inside. The stranger-turned-into-your-date stays parked by the curb until he’s sure that you’re safely inside. Once the door closes and you’re nowhere in sight anymore, he speeds off.

Your apartment is empty, silent and empty when you lock yourself inside. Once you’re alone in the quietness of your home it dawns on you what happened tonight. How a stranger just scooped in and became your date for the night, saving you from experiencing something insanely embarrassing. How that said stranger was in fact one of the most handsome men you have ever laid your eyes upon and god, the way his lips felt. You feel your cheeks heat up as you recall the feeling of his lips against yours, the way his hands were all over your body, sliding over every curve and dip, pulling you closer and pushing you away again.

Kissing Jimin was probably a mistake and you should feel guilty about it but you don’t. You’re not quite sure if it was actions out of spite towards your always absent boyfriend or if it was pure attraction between you and Jimin. Maybe a little bit of both. What you do know is that what happened tonight is one of the most spontaneous things you’ve ever done and you have to admit that you liked the rush running through your body as Jimin pulled you into his lap after the first few kisses turned hungrier. But your inner, more reasonable, consciousness is telling you that Jimin was and should remain a one time thing even though you agreed to a real date with him. Dating your current boyfriend is what you’re supposed to do. After all, his parents and your own had ambitions about the two of you getting married sooner or later. Something you’re not so sure about anymore after tonight. Not that you even had been sure about it in the first place.

Although Jimin was a true gentleman, breaking the kiss before it would escalate into something more and possibly something you’d regret later on, and proceeding to invite you out on a real actual date rather than whatever tonight was, you know deep inside that what you did was wrong and that you shouldn’t let a complete stranger like Jimin be the reason for ruining the stable relationship you have with your boyfriend. Seokmin is everything every girl could ever need and want, you should be happy to be his partner.

But you’ve never wanted what every other girl wanted.

That might have occured to Seokmin after about two years of being with you. The past three years of dating Seokmin have been different for every year to say the least. When you first met him almost four years ago you found him handsome and smart, a very bright man with lots of ambition and will to thrive within his career. Something that later would become a growing problem within your relationship and most likely also the reason for him standing you up tonight. The first year with Seokmin was delightful, a bliss of a new and exciting adventure for the both of you and then after your first anniversary Seokmin fell into a routine of sleeping over at your place, kissing you goodnight briefly and kissing you goodbye as well when he left early the next morning to go to work. There was just never a moment of happiness after the first anniversary but you sucked it up because your parents did not raise a quitter and you cared about Seokmin. You really did. However, as you reached the third anniversary you stood your ground more often and took up the fights whenever Seokmin would be absent for way longer than acceptable. It has torn your relationship to hang in thin strings and perhaps that’s why kissing Jimin tonight didn’t feel like something wrong but instead like something to be grateful for.

Perhaps if you hadn’t kissed Jimin tonight, you wouldn’t have realized how off the track your relationship with Seokmin really is. Maybe you wouldn’t have realized that whatever the two of you have might not be worth fighting for. The only thing you’d fight for would be the stability of it and the secureness that comes along with marrying someone like Seokmin, and the fact that you’re slightly scared of what your parents might say if you ever came home and told them Seokmin was no longer a part of your life because they adored him like their own son and they have told you on multiple occasions that he’s a real catch and that you should marry him at some point. And perhaps that’s why you haven’t called it quits yet and probably won’t anytime soon because there’s always that part of you that cares what other people think or more importantly... what your parents think.

Your thoughts are running wild as you lay in bed, tucked into the duvets like it’s freezing but you’re just craving some kind of comfort as your brain is overworking itself. The sound of the front door being unlocked causes you to glance at your alarm on the bedside table. 

1:03 am. 

Seokmin doesn’t even try to be quiet as he arrives home, dropping his briefcase onto the floor and slamming the closet doors after hanging up his jacket. Your back is facing the bedroom door when he opens it and waltzes inside. He’s humming to himself as if nothing happened tonight and moves to the bathroom to get ready for bed. You feel your eyes dwell with tears as you listen to him moving around, realizing how inconsiderate he actually can be when he wants to. Once the bed dips behind you, the least you expected from him was a kiss goodnight but nothing comes and before you know it, he’s snoring with his back to you.

A deep sigh falls from your lips as you relax in your spot, gripping the duvet tighter and moving as far away from Seokmin as possible until you’re almost laying on the very edge of the bed. Tonight has been eventful; all from being stood up to Jimin saving your ass to Seokmin arriving home without saying a single word to you… And the realisation that the relationship you’re in is a complete disaster and probably nothing can save it anymore. Sleep overcomes you before you can feel a single tear roll down your cheek.

Seokmin leaves before you wake up the next day, his side of the bed perfectly made as if he was never there. It’s a lazy day and you’re thankful today is a day off work for you. The after effects of all the wine from last night are mocking you to no end and you’re pretty sure if the after effects were a person, they would be laughing at you as you mope around the quiet apartment. Drinking on a Wednesday never ends well. You make yourself a cup of coffee and some cereal before moving to the couch where you immediately pull up your comfort show – Friends, a classic.

You’ve been glancing at your phone from time to time ever since waking up and it’s slowly driving you crazy. You’ve kind of been hoping that Jimin would contact you at some point but you also know that it might not be a good idea if he actually does. After getting that small taste of what it’s like with Jimin, you find yourself craving more and more but you’re not too sure if you want to throw away the stability and secureness you have going on in your shared life with Seokmin. Maybe Jimin is simply a phase you need to get through and then everything will go back to normal and your relationship with Seokmin will slide back on track. Perhaps it could be that easy.

But nothing is never as easy as it could’ve been. 

The sound of a new message appearing on your phone surprises you and causes you to jump in your spot on the couch. You had been in your own thoughts for a second there, completely oblivious to your surroundings. Lowkey hoping it’s Jimin, you quickly unlock your phone and press the ‘messages’ icon. Your racing heart falls to the pit of your stomach, the small smile on your face turning into a frown once you see who the message is from.

[10:38 am] Seokmin: Won’t be home until tomorrow evening because of work. Will have to cancel movie night tonight, sorry. Love you.

You roll your eyes, scoffing to yourself at the message from your boyfriend. To say you’re surprised would be an exaggeration. Also, you couldn’t care less if he cancelled movie night. Movie night hasn’t been the same since Seokmin got promoted and insisted he had work to do at all times, and from that day movie night consisted of you actually watching the movie and Seokmin sitting beside you with his computer in his lap, typing away. The sound of him typing is always stuck in your head several hours after because the sound is so annoying. After all, movie night was just a weak attempt of saving your relationship by inserting ‘traditions’ so to speak. 

Re-reading the message from Seokmin, you notice the three words at the end of his text. You blink in surprise before your eyebrows are furrowing together in suspicion. Those three words are very unusual in a text from Seokmin. Hell, he doesn’t even say those words to you in person. That’s odd, you think to yourself but put your phone away nonetheless. You’re not in the mood to respond to it at the moment. However, his message remains on your mind for the rest of the day. You’ve been re-reading the message several times ever since receiving it, wondering why he would use those three words so randomly when he hasn’t said it to you for almost a year. 

It doesn’t feel right at all.

Now that you come to think of it, Seokmin’s behavior has seemed a bit suspicious lately. First it was the very odd working hours late at night then it was the day to day working hours and now it’s the three intimate and very unusual words in his text. It’s like he’s covering up something by acting like he cares about the relationship he has with you. 

You glance at the time, it’s almost 6 pm. After these years of dating Seokmin, you know that most of the people at his office leave at around 5 pm and that the only people left at 6 pm would be himself, the chairman, and receptionist in the lobby. To investigate your own theory further you pick up your phone and dial the phone number you know by heart. After a few rings the receptionist picks up on the other end.

“Hi Irene, it’s ____. Is Seokmin still at the office?” you ask right away. Irene, the receptionist on the other end, sounds ecstatic as she realises you’re calling the office after a long time. “It’s nice to hear from you too, Irene,” you reply with a genuine smile because Irene is just the kindest person you’ve ever met and to use her like this definitely rubs you the wrong way but there’s no way you’ll ever find out what Seokmin is up to otherwise. “Can you tell me whether Seokmin is still there or not? He isn't home yet and I’m starting to worry.”

“I’m sorry but Mr. Kim left earlier today, much earlier than he usually does actually. He didn’t say where he was going though,” Irene says, the tone of her voice causing you to imagine her frowning as she answers your question. “Has he not contacted you? I had a feeling it was date night tonight or something judging by the way he was practically skipping out of here in pure excitement.”

You feel as if someone is grabbing and clenching your heart tightly, sighing in defeat, “Oh, well, thanks Irene. Take care, yeah?”

“You too, ____,” you imagine her smiling in that warm, comforting way she always does when talking to people. Must be that serviceminded personality of hers. “Let me know if there’s anything else I can do for you.”

You smile, “I will, thank you.”

Hanging up, you let out a heavy sigh. There’s something in you that is relieved to hear that Seokmin is probably out doing something as crazy as being on a date with another woman and yet there’s also a slight hint of hurt in there as well. The relief is obviously because this means that you don’t have to feel guilty for your spontaneous date with Jimin or for kissing him. The hurt is because, if it’s true, Seokmin cheated on you first. This unknown woman he’s seeing behind your back is probably also the reason for why he stood you up and arrived home late from what he claimed to be work. You feel yourself become a bit nauseous at the thought of him being with her right this moment as you sit alone in the apartment you share with him, the slight shock from being right about Seokmin’s suspicious behavior is still hanging around you like a dark cloud.

A new text chimes in on your phone. You tear yourself from your thoughts, raising your phone to look at the screen. Jimin’s name is brightly displayed on the small screen and it goes unnoticed by you that a small smile appears on your face as you unlock to read it. 

[6:24 pm] Jimin: hey, just thought i’d check up on you. i hope you’re not too hungover after drinking all that wine last night ;) - jimin

It was indeed a lot of wine. The headache you had when you woke up is just now starting to fade away, the amount of water you’ve been drinking throughout the day has helped a great deal. You’re smiling as you type out a response to Jimin.

[6:26 pm] You: hi!! had a headache this morning, but i’m alright, thanks :) wbu?

You put your phone down and get up from the couch, deciding it’s better than sitting around and waiting for a reply. After all, you do need to eat some dinner. You forget about your phone for a while as you move around the kitchen, cooking yourself some dinner to eat before it gets too late for it to be healthy. Your dinner consists of a quickly made salad and some chicken cooked on a pan. It’s simple but very delicious. You let out a moan as you take a bite, mentally patting yourself on the shoulder for making something so good yet healthy and light to the stomach. It feels good to be eating something less greasy after last night with steak and red wine.

Just as you plop back down on the couch, a plate with dinner in one hand and a new glass of water in the other, another text from Jimin appears on your phone. You put your plate and water down before grabbing your phone, reading the messages he has sent you since you started making dinner. You let out a chuckle at his reply to your message, smiling in amusement.

[6:30 pm] Jimin: definitely still feeling the after effects since some friends thought it was a good idea to go drinking after work today. i really shouldn’t have drank those two beers earlier

[6:34 pm] Jimin: i really enjoyed myself last night tho :) i would love to see you again soon

[6:48 pm] Jimin: if i ask nicely, would you be up for lunch with me tomorrow?

You ponder over Jimin’s proposal about a lunch date. Considering everything that has happened the past two days, an innocent lunch date with Jimin wouldn’t hurt anyone. Besides, Seokmin is probably too busy with his secret girlfriend to even care about what you’re doing during and outside your working hours. If he really cared, he would’ve broken up with you before indulging in an affair with some random woman.

[6:59 pm] You: lunch sounds great!! my break’s at 12 tomorrow, where do you wanna meet up?

[7:00 pm] Jimin: i was thinking i could bring lunch to your work? or we can meet at some café if that’d be better

Having Jimin come to your office for lunch probably wasn’t a good idea as most of your colleagues know you’ve been with Seokmin for a long time. Only your boss, Jungkook, knows you well enough to not think badly of you for meeting Jimin for lunch. He has told you multiple times that he isn’t a fan of Seokmin and that he isn’t the right one for you, that you should end things with him. These opinions are based on the things you’ve told him during lunch breaks, things like Seokmin staying late at work once again or when he cancels the plans you’ve made in an attempt to save the relationship or how he barely talks to you when he’s actually home. If Jungkook, who hasn’t even met Seokmin, can see that the relationship with Seokmin isn’t genuine anymore then it might be time for some changes. Except you already know that but it’s just hard to accept when you’ve spent three years of your life with this man whom you thought was going to be the man you’d marry someday.

[7:01 pm] You: i don’t mind you coming to my office :) i work at Jeon Publishing, just say my name at the front desk and they’ll let you through

[7:02 pm] Jimin: perfect! see you tomorrow at 12 ;)

The office is dull today, nothing much is happening and only a small number of people are at work this Friday. You’ve been going over the last details of next month’s issue of the magazine you’ve scored yourself a job on when your boss announced Jeon Publishing would be taking over the publishing of it. Once you finish up, you grab the mock magazine and bring it to your boss’ office, knocking before stepping inside. Jungkook smiles at you as you come closer to his desk. 

“Here’s the final mock magazine. Thought you maybe could give it a quick look-through before I say go for printing,” you say as you put the magazine down in front of him, watching as he glances over the cover of it, the infamous actor and playboy Kim Seokjin adorning it with his good looks. Jungkook huffs out a chuckle when skimming through the magazine, pausing at a photo of the actor doing his signature pose, winking with two finger guns pointed towards the camera.

“Looks good, ____, great job,” your boss compliments your work, handing the magazine back to you. You thank him quietly, your eyes zoomed in on the magazine in your hands. Jungkook notices your quietness, finding it odd for you as you’re usually a very bright and happy person whenever you come into his office. “You alright?”

Whipping your head up to look at your boss, you smile immediately and nod, “yeah, i’m fine. why?”

Jungkook shrugs nonchalantly. “You seem quiet.”

Letting out a chuckle, you glance at the clock on his wall. Jimin will be here any minute now and your nerves are getting the best of you. You haven’t seen him since he pulled you into his lap inside his car and you had the most heated makeout session of your life. “I’m just nervous,” you tell your boss who’s more of a friend than a boss after working together for years, “I have a lunch date today with this guy I met recently.”

“Really?” Jungkook smirks softly, leaning back in his chair, bringing his arms up to rest behind his head, “what about Seokmin? Is he out of the picture?”

Grimacing, you shrug. “Kind of, I guess?” You say, the words coming out like a question instead of an answer, “things have been very, um... strange lately.”

Jungkook nods as if he understands which he probably doesn’t because this man has been dating the same woman since he graduated college and you lowkey envy him for finding someone special that early in his life. “Well, you already know what my opinion about Seokmin is. Just follow your gut and do what you feel is right for you, alright? Once you find someone who’s worth your time, you’ll know. Trust me.”

You smile at your boss, feeling a wave of comfort washing over you at his words. “Thanks, Jungkook,” you say, “I really needed to hear that.”

“Anytime, ____,” he sends you a wink before putting on a serious (not really) face, “now get back to work!”

A laugh falls from your lips as you turn on your heel, heading out of his office and back to your own. Halfway across the open office, you hear less people talking, their voices turning into hushes of whispering. You glance over your shoulder, noticing how almost everyone is looking the same way towards the elevator. You follow their line of vision, your eyes landing on a dirty-blonde, handsome man stepping out of the elevator with a brown paper bag in his hand, car keys dangling from a loose grip in the other. He looks around the place he just stepped into, skimming the people before his eyes land on you. A wide smile spreads across his face as he starts making his way to you. You feel your cheeks heat up at the sight of him, your eyes falling down to skim him from bottom to top. His tight, black jeans are hugging his legs nicely, allowing you to see how the muscles in his thighs contradict for every step he takes closer to you. He’s wearing a denim jacket with a black t-shirt underneath and a pair of black sunglasses pushed into his fluffy, dirty-blonde hair, keeping it away from his face. This look is very relaxed compared to

You hear a woman in the office muttering a low ‘god, he’s hot’ but loud enough for you to hear as you keep your eyes on Jimin. You notice how he doesn’t even notice the way the women in the office are basically drooling and swooning at the sight of him, not sparing them a single glance as he walks up to you. Stopping in front of you, he doesn’t even hesitate to wrap an arm around your waist and pull you closer only to press a soft kiss to your cheek.

“Hey babe,” he greets you, a small smirk playing upon his lips. He holds up the paper bag. “I hope you like burgers.”

You can’t believe he just used that nickname again, obviously aware of what effect it has on you as he watches the way you pull your lips into your mouth before letting a smile overtake your features. You nod, “love burgers.”

Twenty minutes later, you’re laughing your heart out, tears appearing in the corner of your eyes. Jimin is sitting in the chair that’s usually in the corner of your office, but he pulled it up to the other side of your desk to sit across from you. He has shrugged off his jacket halfway through your lunch and you’ve had a hard time focusing on what he has been saying ever since. His arms are just so toned. You’ve both finished the burgers and are now munching on the fries he had bought as well, laughing and talking about anything that comes to mind. You wipe the small wetness from the corner of your eyes, letting out a sigh after laughing hard. You can’t remember the last time you laughed so much.

“Oh god, that’s funny,” you mutter weakly, sniffling lightly because he really made you laugh till you almost cried. Jimin is grinning at you, watching you as you make sure your mascara isn’t smudged underneath your eyes. He’s pretty sure your laugh is one of his favorite sounds, not your shy laugh or your regular laugh, but that laugh he just pulled from you. A laugh so contagious and carefree where you scrunch your eyes together and throw your head back and the sound just makes his heart flip inside his chest.

Silence overcomes the two of you. Jimin’s eyes are scanning your face as you look at him. You don’t move away when he slowly leans over the desk, hand coming up to chin. You stay quiet as his thumb brushes the corner of your mouth, removing the small remnants of seasoning from the fries. Heat washes over your face, your heart beating faster as Jimin takes a chance and leans even closer over the desk. Your eyes fall to his lips, the pink color and plushiness of them making them seem irresistible. Before you know it, Jimin is cupping your jaw and pulling you in, his lips pressing softly against yours. Sighing deeply, you close your eyes and melt into him, kissing him back. His thumb is caressing your cheekbone softly as he tilts his head, deepening the kiss. His tongue brushes against yours, your hand coming up to wrap around his wrist, keeping his hand in place on your cheek. You missed kissing Jimin, the feeling of his lips unlike anything else. You want to pull him back in when he leaves a few soft and feather-like pecks against your mouth before pulling away slightly. 

“Been waiting to kiss you again,” he mutters against your lips, his breath fanning over your slightly parted lips.

“Kiss me more,” you quietly whisper, hoping he’ll fulfill your wish. Smirking softly, he leans in again, his kisses turning more harsh and hungry. A soft whimper falls from your lips as he bites onto your bottom lip, sucking on it softly. Fuck, you mentally cry. You’re slightly shocked to feel the wetness between your legs just from kissing Jimin. He hasn’t even touched you anywhere intimate. Jimin swallows your whimpers and moans as he pushes the leftover food to the side before beckoning you to crawl over the desk. Lips are still working against each other as he helps you over the desk. He helps you to sit on the edge of it before pushing himself closer to you, moving himself to stand between your spreaded legs.

As Jimin’s hands run up the expanse of your thighs and his lips leave yours to attach his lips to the skin on your neck, you mentally thank your boss for giving you an office that doesn’t have glass walls like his own does. Your mind is only half-aware of the fact that the door is unlocked as Jimin leaves wet kisses all over your neck and jaw. Your head falls back, giving him more space as your hands run up his arms and further up to his shoulders and neck, your fingers sliding into his hair. It isn’t until he grinds slightly against you that you’re pulled back to reality.

“J-Jimin,” you gasp out as he grasps your waist tightly, pulling you tight against him. “Jimin, the door- it’s unlocked.”

That causes Jimin to pause in his movements, his head buried in the crook of your neck. He’s breathing heavily, the short moment of grinding causing his thoughts to become foggy, the only thing on his mind being you and how much he’d love to take you right here on this very desk, his want almost strong enough to ignore the fact that the door is unlocked and literally anyone could walk in on the two of you.

“I don’t know how long I’ll be able to hold this off,” he chuckles as he lifts his head to look at you. You’re smiling at him apologetically, your hands falling from their grip in his hair and down to rest upon his chest. You don’t know what to say, having a difficult time processing what he means by ‘this’. You know what he means, you’re just not sure if you’re ready to imagine what it’d be like. The thought of simply imagining it brings a tingle to your stomach and a clenching feeling to occur between your legs. Your eyes fall to where Jimin’s hands are resting upon your thighs, thumbs brushing over the fabric of your pants. “Can I lure you into having dinner with me at my place tonight?”

Looking up at him, you can’t help but smile. This thing where Jimin is interested in spending time with you and wants to see you as often as possible is strange. You’ve completely forgotten what it feels like to be wanted like this. It’s nice, you think to yourself as you look at the man in front of you. He’s smiling softly at you, patiently waiting for you to say yes or no to his offer. Seokmin did say in his text that he wouldn’t be home until later tonight, so what could possibly be stopping you from having dinner with Jimin at his place? That’s right – nothing.

“I’d love that,” you tell him without giving it another thought. Jimin smiles and leans down, lips connecting with yours in a soft and tender kiss. God, the way you’ll never get tired of kissing him.

“How does six o’clock sound?” He asks once he pulls away from your mouth, just only enough to speak. You feel the air from his words hitting your mouth. You nod and lean in again, kissing him some more.

“Perfect.”

“What to wear… What to wear… What. To. Wear?” You mumble to yourself as you skim through your closet, trying to figure out what would be appropriate for a dinner at home. You have no idea what Jimin would like. You pause when your fingers brush over a tight beige colored dress. Perhaps- No, not that one. It’s a dinner at home, nothing too fancy or too relaxed. You need the perfect in between outfit. Continuing to skim through your clothes, you stop at a few options but decide against them, groaning in frustration because how hard can it fucking be to choose an outfit for a nice, cozy dinner at home? Very hard apparently.

Deciding against anything in your closet, you grumble under your breath while retrieving your phone from its spot on the bed. You’re quickly dialing Jungkook’s number, deciding that he and his fiancé is the only chance you have of finding a decent outfit.

“Yes?” Jungkook calmly answers his phone.

“I need help,” you greet him, “I don’t know what to wear for my dinner date and I think I’m seconds away from having a yelling fit.”

Jungkook chuckles on the other end, “calm down, will you? It can’t be that difficult.”

You sigh deeply. “Apparently it can,” you grumble.

You listen as Jungkook hums for a moment as if he’s thinking but you know you’re on speaker and that he’s waiting for his fiancé to help him help you. You hear her speaking in the background, her voice muffled out as you try to listen in. “Thanks, babe,” Jungkook then says before returning to you, “Sunhee says you should go with jeans, or a skirt, with a simple but elegant top.”

A few options and pieces are already appearing in your head after Jungkook passed his fiancé’s ideas on to you. “That sounds like an idea, thanks Sunhee!”

This time you hear her replying, a low ‘no problem, babe!’ sounding through the speaker. You really like Jungkook’s fiancé. She’s always so nice to you and after all this time, you’d actually just call her a friend of yours instead of just your boss’ fiancé. Jungkook scoffs, “what about me?”

“Oh, please,” you laugh, “you wouldn’t be able to help me if Sunhee hadn’t been there.”

Jungkook stills on the other end. “That’s not important. What matters is that I can fire you if I want to ergo you should thank me too.”

Rolling your eyes, you retort, “you didn’t even fire me when I accidentally deleted that article you had spent so much time on!”

“Consider this your strike two then,” Jungkook warns but you know he’s all jokes and not one bit serious. There’s no way he would fire the best creative director Jeon Publishing has ever had.

“Thank you, Kook! See you on Monday,” you coo jokingly, an undertone of laughter in your voice.

“Yeah, whatever.”

A small chuckle leaves your lips when he hangs up and leaves you to yourself. Following Sunhee’s advice, you grab a pair of blackwashed jeans from your closet along with a white tight-fitting top – nothing too fancy but still dressed up enough for you to look nice. You pair it with a loosely fitting cardigan in a faded beige color. 

As you stand by your dresser while putting on some jewelry, your thoughts begin to flow. You wonder if Jimin will like your outfit or if it’s too casual? Another thing that comes to your mind is the fact that you’re getting ready for a dinner date with someone who isn’t your boyfriend. It surprises you how you’re not disgusted with yourself for doing all this behind Seokmin’s back but you’re also convinced that fact alone shows just how much this relationship isn’t actually a relationship.

Before your thoughts can go any further, you finish up putting on some simple makeup and slip on some shoes. You don’t look back at all as you take the keys to your car and leave the apartment you and Seokmin are sharing. The drive to Jimin’s place is just you letting your nerves get the best of you. The thought of going to his place and the thought of him cooking you dinner is making your stomach tingle in that funny way. You bet his place is really nice, there’s no way it isn’t with that job he has. You remember him telling you about it on that spontaneous date the other night. You didn’t quite understand what exactly his job is but he works for Jung Enterprises and that alone says a lot about his income.

You find yourself to be right once you park your car outside of a very large and tall skyscraper. Walking up to the front doors, you skim the doorbell for Jimin’s name. You spot the small tag that says ‘Park Jimin, apartment 1608’, pressing it and waiting as it rings a few times. The sound of the door being unlocked causes your heart to beat a bit faster. You push yourself inside and take the elevator to the 16th floor. Your nerves are at top speed, your heart hammering in your chest as you make your way out of the elevator and towards Jimin’s apartment. Mentally telling yourself to calm down, you knock three times. You hear Jimin make his way to the door and before you know it, he appears in front of you, that damn charming smile on his lips again.

Holy shit, do you want to kiss him again… And again, and again.

“Hey you,” he greets you, stepping to the side to allow you inside. Once your feet have passed the threshold and you stand right in front of him, you let your body move on its own as you cup his neck, pulling him in for a kiss. Like you said, you’ll never ever get tired of kissing those plush lips. Jimin hums in response, one arm sliding around your waist as he kisses you back. After a few kisses, you break away from him.

“Hi,” you softly say, causing him to smile even wider. He quickly steals a peck from you before he lets go and helps you out of your jacket. A delicious aroma of spices fills your nostrils, your stomach growling lightly at the smell. Jimin appears back at your side after hanging up your jacket, his hand grabbing yours softly and guiding you further into his apartment. His apartment is a very open space – wide windows in the living room that allows you to look over the Seoul skyline, all the lights making up a beautiful view. He has large brown leather couches and a big flatscreen TV, lamps you recognize to be some quite expensive you saw in that one magazine you read once. There’s a fireplace in his living room as well, turned on and bringing some coziness to the entire open space.

“The food is just about ready,” Jimin says, guiding you to the couch area and motioning you to take a seat on the large pillows on the floor. You notice how he set up the coffee table already, expensive cutlery along with wine glasses and regular glasses. The more you take in simple details of his home the more intimidated you get, just now realizing how well-paid Jimin actually is. He hasn’t really given off that vibe since you met him the other night except for when he told you he worked at Jung Enterprises.

“It smells really good, Jimin,” you give his cooking a genuine compliment. Your mouth has been watering ever since the aroma hit your nostrils.

“Thanks, it’s one of my mom’s recipes,” he tells you as he moves back to the kitchen to check up on the food. You take this moment to glance him over, taking in his appearance. He looks just as casual as you in his black, slightly tight slacks and a knitted sweater. Once he deems it done, he serves it onto two plates before bringing them to where you’re seated. He places a plate in front of you and the other in his spot before taking a seat on the other side of the coffee table. “My mom has always insisted I make this exact dish for a very special woman and not just any woman.”

“Oh.” You feel your face heat up at the subtle compliment. Jimin is softly smirking as he grabs the wine bottle, unscrewing the lid before pouring some in your glass and then his own. Raising his own for you to clink it with yours, he smiles. You clink your glass against his, smiling back at him.

“To a special night,” he winks at you.

“To a special night,” you softly repeat before taking a sip of the delicious red wine he had poured you. This night will definitely be more special than many other nights and also, without a doubt, better than all the evenings and dinners you’ve had with Seokmin. You don’t even give Seokmin a thought as you and Jimin dig into the dish he so nicely made for you. He cooks, he kisses so well, he’s handsome and he’s sweet and kind. What you don’t know yet is that he’s completely and utterly whipped for you already. All you know is that you’re headed the same way with the way your heart beats a bit faster every time he glances your way.

After a few bites in comfortable silence, you speak up. “Tell me more about yourself,” you say, smiling as you take a sip of your wine. Jimin looks at you as he puts the cutlery down to clasp his hands in front of him. 

“Is there more you’d like to know?” He asks, voice soft and delicate in a way.

You shrug, smirking softly as you let your hand find his on top of the table. “I wanna know everything,” you tell him. 

And it’s true. You want to know about the small things about him. You want to know things like what his mom used to call him when he was little, you want to know about his relationships in the past and why they didn’t work out, you want to know how he likes his eggs in the morning, for god's sake. 

Jimin’s hand engulfs yours, his thumb caressing the back of it as he stays silent for a moment. You wait patiently, feeling like you have all the time in the world to get to know this man you’ve found yourself thinking about non-stop the past three days.

“Well, I’m originally from Busan, but moved here to attend university,” he starts off, “I love living in Seoul but going home to Busan is always what makes me the most happy. I’m a family guy, always have been. I love spending time with my parents and my brother.” 

You smile and nod, listening carefully as he talks about himself. While he continues to talk about his family and childhood, you can’t help but imagine a small Jimin running around with a huge grin on his face, playing with his younger brother whom you’re sure looks like him in many ways. He speaks fondly of his family, saying his dad is who he’s closest with and that his dad encouraged him to move to Seoul and get himself an education that’d make him successful later on in life. 

“He always told me to follow my heart and do what makes me happy,” Jimin has a small smile on his face as he talks about his dad, “he always said I should get myself a good education, not just any education but an education in something I enjoy.”

“That’s really great advice,” you say softly. Jimin nods, muttering a low ‘yeah’. 

Silence falls upon the two of you, the only sound filling the place is the low, calm music coming from the speaker. Jimin really knows how to create the perfect dinner night. Your hand is still in his as you close your eyes momentarily, dipping your head from side to side to stretch your neck. Jimin watches you, gulping as he runs his eyes over you and your body. At some point throughout him talking about his family, you had shedded your cardigan which leaves you in that tight-fitting white top. Even though the light is dimmed, he can easily tell you’re wearing a very thin bra underneath, your nipples slightly showing through the thin fabric of the bra and the top.

You let out a sigh of relief from stretching your neck before opening your eyes again. Jimin’s eyes are darker than before, hooded as he looks at you. You watch with a frantically beating heart as his tongue wets his lips. It goes straight to your core, a source of excitement running through your body as Jimin leans closer.

“I had planned for dessert but I can’t wait anymore,” he softly says, voice raspy as he reaches up and tugs your hair behind your ear before cupping your cheek. You feel his thumb running over your cheekbone, his eyes roaming your face and pausing at your slightly parted lips. “Wanna kiss you so bad… make you feel good.”

“Please do,” you breathe out, waiting impatiently to have him close against you again. Jimin closes the gap between you, pressing his lips to yours in a soft yet hungry kiss. A soft moan tumbles from your mouth and into his as he pulls you from your seat and into his lap. You straddle him as his hands run over the expanse of your thighs and further around to your ass, pushing you forward to meet his already slightly hardened cock. A gasp falls from you, your hand grasping his shoulder tightly as he pulls you against the bulge in his pants once again. “Fuck,” you whimper.

“You feel that?” He rasps out against your lips before moving on to press his lips against your neck, kissing his way up to your jaw and then to your ear, tongue flicking your earlobe as he moves you to grind down on him again, “all for you, baby.”

This man will end you, you’re sure of it.

Your head falls back as he kisses his way back down your neck, leaving open-mouthed kisses against your skin until he reaches your collarbones. His hands run from your ass to your waist, slipping underneath your top to feel your warm skin. He pulls away shortly to look at you, needing your approval before he rips this tight top off you. You nod, but that isn’t good enough for him.

“Need your words,” he whispers as he pecks your lips softly, a stark contrast to the hungry kisses from before.

“Yes,” you breathe out, leaning back in to kiss him, lips moving so perfectly together and tongues brushing against one another. You feel Jimin’s hands pushing the top up and further up until it’s over your breasts. He breaks the kiss to pull it over your head, throwing it to the side as he returns to your mouth. His hands come up to cup your breasts through the flimsy bra you’re wearing, the fabric doing little to hide your perked nipples. He had been right, you were wearing a thin bra.

He grunts against your mouth as his thumbs run across the still covered nipples, your hips grinding against his as a reaction. “Gotta get this off,” he mumbles, fingers quickly finding the clasp on the back. His fingers work fast to undo it before reaching for the straps to pull them down. You feel the fabric brush against your skin as it’s removed and thrown to the side, joining your top. Jimin leans back, biting his bottom lip tightly as he looks you up and down as you sit there in his lap. Wetting his lips once again, he glances up at you with a smirk on his lips. You watch as he leans down to wrap his mouth around a nipple, your mouth falling open as a gasp emits from it.

“Ohhh god,” you moan, pleasure running through your body as he sucks and bites your nipple while the other breast is caressed by one of his hands. He’s all in your head and all over your body as he caresses it, lips pleasuring you and hands roaming your skin and every dip. His name falls from your lips in a breathy voice, the sound pure music in his ears.

“Bedroom?” He asks, pulling away from your nipple to look at you. 

You shake your head, “no, here’s fine.”

Jimin doesn’t think more of it as he returns his mouth to clash against yours. Your arms snake around his neck, pulling yourself closer against him. Jimin groans against your lips as you grind down on him, desperate to feel him against your wet and clenching core. You’re sure there’s a wet spot on your jeans by now from how wet you feel yourself becoming the more you’re grinding against him. You let your hands travel from his shoulders and down his chest, reaching for the hem of his knitted sweater. Jimin helps you strip him of his sweater, his toned torso coming into view. You glance him over, taking in how well-built he is. It’s like there isn’t one single bad thing about him.

His chest is rising and falling as he pants, watching your face as you take in his body, your hands softly running over the dip of his abs. You brush your fingertips over the ‘nevermind’ tattoo on his ribs, looking up at him. He smiles, a soft and warm smile that makes your insides tingle like a small schoolgirl with a huge crush. You hum in response as he leans up and kisses you, lips capturing yours in a soft kiss.

“Wanna feel you so bad, Jimin,” you whisper against his lips, pulling away to kiss the underline of his jaw. He lets his head fall back to give you more space to leave your wet kisses against his skin. You feel his cock tensing in his pants, the fabric must be confining for him. You reach down, still leaving kisses all over his neck as you unbuckle his belt and unzips his pants. Jimin chokes on his breath as you pull him out, wrapping your hand around his hard cock. His cock is so pretty, you think to yourself. Good length and girth, fits nicely in your hand but still with room to move. You pump him, thumb wiping the precum from the tip and using it as lube to make your hand move up and down easily. Your mouth waters at the sight of it and you feel yourself becoming wetter at the sight of his cock in your hand, more precum leaking as you watch your hand pumping up and down his length. Jimin lets out a low moan at the way you softly squeeze him while giving him a handjob.

“Fuck,” he rasps out, his head falling back entirely at the feeling of your hand around him. “Feels good, baby.”

“Yeah?” You hum, moving up to meet his lips with your own. He cups your face with one hand, keeping you in place as he kisses you back, hungry and wet. His tongue moves against yours, a guttural moan tumbling into your mouth as you wipe the pad of your thumb over his tip once again. “Want you in me, please.”

Jimin’s cock tenses in your hand at the sound of your words, the pleading tone appealing to his dominating side. Kissing you slowly, he drops his hand from your cheek to the base of your neck. Without another word, he slides his hand up to wrap softly around your throat, tightening it carefully. You gasp, the feeling going straight to your core. His teeth bite into your bottom lip before pulling away, letting go of your lip with a pop sound. “On the couch, sweetheart.”

You look him in the eyes, noticing how they had changed since this whole thing began. A smirk plays on his lips, waiting patiently for you to follow his order. You don’t question it, catching the nod of approval when you get off his lap and onto the couch. Jimin strips himself entirely of his pants and boxers, standing before you in his naked glory. You lay back, watching as he wraps his hand around his cock, pumping it slowly. “Want you to remove your pants and spread your legs for me,” he says, moving closer and placing his knees on the couch to stand in front of you. You do as he says, unbuttoning your jeans and sliding them off. You leave your lace thong on, noticing the way Jimin’s eyes zoom in on the black fabric of them, softly licking his lips at the sight. Jimin moves to lay down between your legs, pushing them further apart. He keeps his eyes locked with yours as he leans down to press open-mouthed, wet kisses to your inner thighs.

A shaky breath leaves you as you watch him, lips slightly parted as he reaches up and brushes the tips of two fingers over your covered, very sensitive, core. You’re positive he feels how wet you are, all because of him. 

“You’ve ruined your panties, baby,” he hums, still smirking as he looks up at you, “completely soaked. Just for me, right?”

You whimper while nodding. 

Jimin tsks, looking up at you from between your legs. “Your words, ____,” he reminds you.

“Y-Yes, Jimin, just for you,” you whine, “please, touch me.”

You don’t need to ask him twice as Jimin leans down to press a kiss against your soaked panties before pulling them to the side, revealing your wet pussy. His breath hits your core causing goosebumps to rise upon your skin. A gasp emits from you when you feel him licking a stripe up between your folds. “Oh my god,” you moan breathily, feeling him lick you again and again. You’ve never been this wet before, you think to yourself as you feel Jimin wrap his lips around your clit. You’re whimpering, back arching as he sucks harshly, a loud whiny moan leaving you.

Jimin watches you as your eyes close and your eyebrows knit together in pure pleasure. You’re writhing above him, hips bucking up to feel more. His hands push your hips back down, holding you down as he starts eating you out at a faster tempo. You’re panting, feeling your first orgasm nearing you as he slurps your wetness, licking and sucking and flicking your clit.

When his fingers dip into your clenching pussy you let out a loud moan of his name, hands moving down to grab his hair. “Fuck, Jimin!” You whine, the first sparks of white hot pleasure clouding your vision. You feel your abdomen tightening, the string in you seconds away from snapping. The last few licks and flicks against your clit with a few pumps of his fingers brings you over the edge, the string snapping and your vision blurring. Jimin licks you through your orgasm, fingers still pumping in and out of you. He groans lowly at the feeling of your walls clenching around his fingers. The thought of you doing that to his dick makes him slightly lightheaded.

Once you’re coming down from your bliss, Jimin crawls his way up and hovers above you. He’s smiling down at you, a hint of a smirk in his smile. You sling your arm over your eyes, letting out a small laugh. Jimin leans down and presses soft kisses to your collarbone and then further down between the valley of your breasts. You let out a heavy sigh, removing your arm again to look down at him.

“Good?” He hums, coming back up to carefully press a kiss to the corner of your mouth.

You nod, “amazing.”

Jimin smiles as he kisses you, tongue immediately meeting yours. One of your hands dig into his hair while the other runs up and down the expanse of his naked back. You sigh deeply as he pulls away from the kiss, moving down your body while leaving kisses in his wake. He flicks your nipple with his tongue before moving further down. He hooks his fingers into the hem of your thong, pulling it down your legs and off before throwing it over his shoulder. You let out a laugh at that causing Jimin to grin at you once he returns to hover over you.

Jimin’s cock brushes your inner thigh, letting you know he’s close to sinking into you and being where he has been craving to be since that first kiss in his car. Before he can push himself inside of you, you press a hand against his chest. “Wait,” you stop him, raising your eyebrows at him in question. Realization hits Jimin and he’s getting off the couch, telling you he’ll be back in a minute. You wait, smiling like a goof when you hear him come running back from getting what you both were thinking of. He rips the silver packaging open with his teeth before sliding the condom on his, still very hard, cock. 

Once that’s done, he returns to his hovering position over you, placing himself at your entrance. He glances up at you for approval. Once you nod, he wastes no time and starts pushing himself between your folds. You gasp at the feeling as he sinks deeper into you, stretching you nicely. Jimin watches the way his cock disappears between your legs, his lips slightly parted at the sight. “Holy shit,” he moans, bottoming out. You let out a breath once he’s all the way in. As a true gentleman, he waits till you’re used to the feeling of him. You’ve never been filled like this before, not with Seokmin or any other man.

“Please move,” you plead, wanting nothing more than to feel him slide in and out of you, fucking you into oblivion like you know he will once you’re both completely used to the feeling of each other. Jimin follows your soft orders, pulling out almost entirely before pushing himself back in. A soft moan falls from your lips as he continues this action over and over. The stretch feels so good, his girth and length just perfect for you. “Fuck Jimin, you feel so good.”

“So do you, baby,” he affirmed, grunting at the feeling of you clenching around him, “fuck, so do you.”

Jimin grabs your legs, silently telling you to wrap them around him. You do so, tightly wrapping your legs around his waist. His hands find a spot on each side of your head, a steady grip on the leather as he starts thrusting harder into you. You gasp, feeling him hit deep in you, the glide of his dick causing him to brush against your clit. “Fuck, fuck, fuck,” you whimper, nails digging into bicep as you grab it with your hand. You’re not allowed to have this grip on him for long as he grabs both your hands, locking them with his own before moving them above your head, keeping your hands from touching him. It’s pure torture but the feeling of his hands intertwined with yours sets off another tingle in you.

You look up at him as he hovers over you, eyes still focused on the way he’s thrusting in and out of you. A thin layer of sweat coats his forehead, neck and his chest. The leather couch doesn’t do any good for your back, sweat appearing on your back as you’re pushed further into the couch from Jimin’s movements. “Oh god, I’m so close,” you moan loudly, tightening your hold on his hands. You gasp as Jimin wraps his lips around one of your nipples, sucking it harshly as he fucks you harder, faster.

“You gonna cum for me, baby? Hmm?” He rasps out, voice raw and low, deeper than when he talks. You can’t speak, he’s dominating all your senses, making sure you feel him everywhere – his dick in you, his hands tightly intertwined with yours, his lips all over your skin, leaving wet kisses everywhere he can reach. “You gonna cum all over my cock?”

“Mhm, fuck yes,” you moan loudly, voice highpitched as he hits a certain spot in you.

“Yeah?” He hisses at the feeling of your walls clenching around him, letting him know that you’re close to your second orgasm, “you gonna fall apart on my cock, huh?”

You nod frantically, feeling your eyes fill with tears at the overwhelming feeling of your second orgasm almost hitting you. Jimin notices the tears in your eyes, smirking as he slows down his pace, grinding into you. “What- Jimin, please!” You cry out, not at all okay with the way he just slowed down and is keeping you from reaching your high. “Jimin, please, faster.”

“Wanna hear you beg, sweetheart,” he’s smirking as you look at him. Oh, he is evil. He untangles his fingers from yours and sits up on his knees, hands grabbing your ankles to bring them to his shoulders. Your jaw falls open at the new position, loving the way he’s grinding deeply into you, but not the slow pace he’s currently fucking you in. It’s complete torture. He smiles as he places a kiss on your ankle, the soft action a complete contrast to the dirty words leaving his lips. “Want me to fuck you faster?”

“Y-Yes,” you whimper, nodding at his words.

“Beg.”

You want to roll your eyes but decide not to, desperate to reach that second orgasm. You bet he’s holding himself from coming right this moment, trying hard not to shoot his load into the condom as you clench around him. He looks so good as he stands there, his hips moving slowly as his dick moves in and out of you slowly, his abs contradicting under his skin, sweat glistening on his forehead and chin, dirty-blonde hair pushed back. He’s beautiful and he’s all yours for the time being. You can’t help yourself as you give in to his demands, the words tumbling from your lips before you can do anything else.

“Please, Jimin, please fuck me faster. I wanna cum all over your cock so bad,” you plead, voice in a desperate whine with an undertone of whimpering, “want you to ruin me, please!”

That seems to satisfy Jimin as he pulls out entirely only to flip you over and pull your ass up to his desired level. You don’t get to say anything before he’s pushing past your walls, sinking deep into you. Your eyebrows knit together tightly as your jaw falls slack at the feeling of him filling you up nicely just like when he slid into you the first time. His pace is brutal, hard and fast against your ass, skin slapping against skin. His hands are tightly gripping your hips, pulling you back against him. “Fuck, baby, you’re so tight,” he moans, one hand coming up to run along your spine. You gasp out his name as he grabs your shoulder and yanks you up, your back against him. One of your hands finds a spot in his hair, your head falling back to rest against his shoulder. His arm wraps around your chest, keeping you upright against his chest as he continues to fuck into you, his cock hitting the right spot over and over again.

“Oh my fucking god” you gasp out, feeling your orgasm nearing once again.

Jimin’s breathing hits the side of your face, his lips brushing against the shell of your ear, “close?”

“Mhm,” you hum, nodding as you bite your lip, holding yourself from moaning too loudly.

“Me- me too, baby,” he tells you, words halting due to a wave of pleasure rushing through his body. You feel his hips stutter, his orgasm seconds away from shooting through him at full speed. “Fuck,” he moans from behind you, the sound being a dirty melody in your ears.

“Oh god,” you moan as Jimin’s hard yet sloppy thrusts throws you over the edge a second time, “Jimin!”

You’re panting as you feel the orgasm raking through your body, the feeling going all the way to the tip of your fingers and toes, your pussy clenching as you try to catch your breath. Jimin feels your walls tightening around him, that alone being enough for him to spill his load into the condom, a low groan of pleasure emitting from his lips as his head drops to rest on your shoulder, his arm still holding you upright.

“Fuck, that was really…” You begin.

“Yeah, it was,” Jimin agrees, breathing heavily as he turns his head to leave a kiss on your cheek before letting go of you. You feel him slip out from between your folds as he moves to get off the couch. “Be right back,” he tells you before jogging (naked) towards the guest bedroom to get a damp towel. You fall back onto the couch, not bothering to cover up as Jimin returns with the damp towel, motioning you to spread your legs so he can clean up the mess down there. He’s careful as you’re still sensitive from the two orgasms he pulled you through tonight. Once you’re all cleaned up, he grabs a blanket from the other couch and moves back to you. You smile as he lays down beside you, pulling you close to his naked body and throwing a blanket over the two of you. You cuddle closer to him, feeling yourself relax entirely in his arms. You both lay in silence, the atmosphere very peaceful and comfortable.

You’re slightly startled when your phone goes off, the ring-tone extremely loud in the quiet living room. You reach for your purse on the floor, grabbing your phone out of it and answering the phone without taking a look at the caller-id. “Hello?” You greet whoever is calling you, a small smile on your lips as you feel Jimin’s lips peppering small kisses all over your shoulder and neck.

“____, where are you?”

You freeze in Jimin’s hold at the sound of Seokmin’s voice on the other end. You can tell Jimin can hear the voice of your boyfriend as he stops kissing your skin. You really should’ve looked at the caller-id before picking up. It’s a bad habit of yours that you need to get rid of eventually. Maybe this right here will teach you that lesson.

“Seokmin,” you breathe out, still kind of shocked he’s actually calling you, “uh, I’m out right now. Why?”

Seokmin is quiet on the other end. “You’re out? With who?”

You steal a glance at Jimin who’s not looking at you, but you know he’s paying attention to whatever Seokmin is saying. “A friend,” you quickly say, deciding that taking the discussion about Jimin and Seokmin’s own secret lover on the phone might not be a good idea right now.

“Well, will you be home soon or not?” Seokmin asks, clearly not giving a shit about what friend you’re with and where in the city you are in this exact moment. You let out a deep sigh, feeling like he just hit you straight in the gut by the sound of disinterest in his voice. “____, are you there?”

You nod, “yeah, I’m here. I’ll be home later.”

“Alright, see you then.”

“Yeah, bye,” you answer him even though he already hung up on you. You put your phone away before turning back to look at Jimin who’s already looking at you. The look on his face breaks your heart, the hurt flashing across his features enough to make you feel like the worst person in the world. “Jimin, I-”

“So you’re in a relationship,” he comments. You don’t say anything, your mind empty of things you could say to save your own situation right now. “And he was the one you were waiting for the other night when we met.” You nod, silently hoping and praying that Jimin will let you explain. A laugh tumbles from his lips and you’d normally find it adorable but not this one – this one is ironic, sarcastic as he shakes his head. “I really thought it was just some date who stood you up but it turns out it was your boyfriend,” he smiles sadly. He glances at you who’s looking at him with sad eyes. His sad smile falters and is replaced by a deep frown, eyes cold and empty of emotion. “I’m such an idiot.”

His words hurt, the fact that he thinks he’s the idiot in this doesn’t sit right with you. If anything, it’s you who’s the idiot. “Jimin, I was planning on breaking up with him. Our relationship ran off the tracks a long time ago,” you tell him, hoping that it would somehow make him see why you’re here with him and not at home with your boyfriend. “He doesn’t care about me at all, but you do.”

Jimin shakes his head at those words, moving to get up from the couch. He grabs his boxers from the floor, slipping them on and then his pants. You sit up, keeping the blanket close to your body, suddenly feeling very vulnerable. “Don’t do that to me, ____,” he says, jaw tightening as he does his best not to look at you, “don’t say that shit to me when you’re not fully available to care for.”

“But-” you try to speak but he isn’t having it, holding up a hand to stop you.

“When were you gonna tell me, huh?” He snapped, “after we fucked and you’ve broken up with him? Or were you just gonna leave it out and hope that it’d never be a subject of conversation?”

You feel your eyes welling up with tears, watching Jimin become angrier and angrier the more he thinks about you and Seokmin and the fact that he just had sex with someone who’s still in a relationship. You can tell it’s bothering him to no end, the way he’s frustratingly running a hand through his hair and tugging on the ends as if to relieve some of the anger that’s coursing through his body. Jimin’s thoughts are running a hundred miles per hour as he paces the living room. There’s one thing he has always sworn to never do again and that is to be involved with women who are already off the market so to speak. He made a mistake with you, ignoring the fact that you had been waiting for someone else and instead being selfish about his attraction to you. After that date the other night, he didn’t even rethink why he was on that date with you in the first place.

“Jimin, I can explain it all to you if you’ll just let me,” you tell him, voice small as you try to talk to him. 

He’s shaking his head. “No… you need to leave,“ he mutters, finally looking up at you, “this,” he points between the two of you, “whatever we had, isn’t going to happen anymore.”

“But Jimin-” you try again, standing up while still clutching the blanket to your front.

He looks at you, hurt painted all over his face because you really did hurt him and his trust. You caused him to break that one thing he swore to never do after it happened with another woman years ago. “____, please just leave,” he pleads, voice less harsh now, “get dressed and get the hell out.”

Without another word, he stalks off towards what you assume is his bedroom, muttering something along the lines of ‘can’t believe it happened again’. Again? You flinch as you hear the door being slammed shut. Tears fall down your cheeks as you begin to get dressed. You glance at the still set table, the wine glasses and plates empty for wine and food. Sighing deeply, you grab your purse from the floor and let yourself out of Jimin’s place, making sure the door is locked after you before heading for the elevator. Once inside the elevator, you let yourself feel the pain of Jimin dismissing you like that. Your cheeks are wet from tears once you reach your car. You get into the driver’s seat, sitting still for a minute as you think about what the hell just happened.

Even though you’ve only known Jimin for such a short amount of time, you’ve felt more wanted and cared for than you ever did with Seokmin. Jimin’s natural loving nature was overwhelming but in the best way possible and you’ll be damned if this is the last time you’ll ever see him. Jungkook’s advice comes to your mind; Just follow your gut and do what you feel is right for you. Your boss is a wise man, you chuckle to yourself before pulling out of the parking lot. You head home with one goal in mind – doing what you feel is right for you by ending things with Seokmin.

The apartment is quiet once you arrive home and step inside. The light is turned on in the living room, the only sound coming from Seokmin who’s seated on the couch and, as always, typing away on his laptop. This man will never stop working.

“Hey,” you call out, barely catching his attention. He glances up at you as a greeting before turning back to his laptop. You sigh deeply, his actions just confirming you in your decision. You step around the couch, placing yourself in front of him.

“What is it?” He asks, finally looking up at you. You know he notices that you’re slightly red around your eyes and that the tip of your nose is a bit red as well. You’re not surprised when he decides not to comment on it.

“We need to talk,” you tell him. 

Seokmin rolls his eyes lightly as he sighs deeply. “Can’t it wait? I got things I need to get done,” he reasons, clearly not in the mood to have a conversation with you right now.

You chuckle humorlessly, reaching a breaking point for his shitty and inconsiderate behavior. “Do you ever stop being a complete asshole?” You ask him, genuinely interested in knowing because you can’t tell if he’ll ever stop behaving like an arrogant jerk.

“What do you mean?” Seokmin asks, his arrogance shining through as he pretends to not know what you’re talking about. You can’t believe some people really behave like this, like they’re better than everyone else and that they never do anything wrong. Unfortunately, Seokmin is one of many and it’s truly sad to see how they make more enemies in life than allies. When you don’t answer him right away, he scoffs, “listen, sweetie, if you’re just here to insult me, can’t you just go to bed or something? I have work to do.”

“I know you’re cheating on me, Seokmin.”

He chokes on his own spit when he hears the words that tumbles from your mouth, coughing for a bit before he looks at you again. “Excuse me?”

You nod. “You heard me, sweetie,” you say in a mocking tone, “don’t try to explain yourself or come up with excuses. I don’t care what you’re doing behind my back, actually, I couldn’t care less.”

He chuckles nervously, “why would I cheat on you when I’ve made a promise to your parents that we’ll get married someday? Isn’t that what you want?”

“Oh, Seokmin, this thing between us has been on the wrong track a loooong time,” you laugh, “there’s no way I’ll ever marry you, you cheating asshole. That would only be putting myself in misery for the rest of my life.”

Seokmin is shocked to say the last. You can easily tell by the way he has no idea what to say or do after you’ve called him out. As you stand here in front of him, anger slowly builds up inside your chest as he still pretends to be innocent and acts like he has never done anything to be unfaithful to you.

“I cared for you for a long time, Seokmin, I really did,” you say, a sad smile on your face, “but you’ve walked all over me more times than I can count and taken my affection for granted. Yes, I wanted to marry you when we first started dating because you were everything my parents wanted in my future husband, but they don't see you like I do. They don’t see you for who you really are which is a pathetic excuse of a boyfriend who thinks he can play off his arrogance and rude behavior by treating his girlfriend to some nice gifts and dinner dates.”

“Where is all this coming from?” Seokmin sighs deeply, finally giving in and not pretending to be something he’s not.

You frown at him, Jimin appearing in your mind as you think about all the reasons for your sudden outburst. Where is all this coming from? You know where. It has been a long time coming but when Jimin came into your life so randomly, you realized that there is a good man in this world who is more than happy to take time out of his day to see you and to do something extra nice for you like cooking dinner. After all Jimin has done the past few days, you find yourself wanting to give back to him; cook him a nice dinner, bring him lunch at work and spend as much time with him as possible. But you’re not sure if that will happen after tonight.

“I met someone,” you tell Seokmin, even though it’s none of his business. Your boyfriend, or whatever he is at the moment, raises his eyebrows.

“You met someone?” He repeats your words. You nod. “And what? He’s your knight in shining armor?”

You smirk. “Something like that,” you quipped, “he’s everything you never were.”

Seokmin nods as he takes in your words. “So what you’re saying is that you’ve been cheating me as well?”

Your smirk falters, a scowl appearing on your face as he turns the conversation around to focus on you. Yes, you cheated on him as well and it is wrong, but you don’t feel bad or guilty about it because Seokmin is just as much a cheater as you are, probably more. Who knows how many times he’s had his dick in other women while you’ve been at home, thinking he was at work every single time?

“You can’t pin this on me, Seokmin. We’re both at fault here,” you point out. When he doesn’t speak up again, you turn on your heel and head for the bedroom, wanting to get out of your clothes and shower. The remnants of Jimin on you is only making the feeling of hurting him worse. You desperately need to get it off before you’re seeing his heartbroken features in your mind again. Before you reach the bedroom, you hear Seokmin speak words you didn’t think he’d say.

“I forgive you,” he calls out causing you to pause in your steps, turning around to look back at him. He gets up from the couch and walks closer to you. You watch as he comes to a stop in front of you, “I forgive you, ____. We can put all this behind us and get married like our parents want us to.”

His hands come up to cup your face, but you slap them away before he can touch you. “Are you kidding me?” You snap, anger taking over your features as you look at him in disbelief. “How can you not see that this relationship is a fucking lost cause? Nothing can save this, Seokmin. We’re done.”

Seokmin sighs deeply in frustration as he watches you whip around and stalk off into the bedroom, slamming the door to the ensuite bathroom behind you. There’s no way in hell you’re ever going to try and fix this with him. Your parents will probably disown you for fucking up something that could’ve been amazing for their reputation but this is your life, not theirs, and you’re certainly not going to spend it with some arrogant asshole who’s only in this relationship with you so that it can benefit him career-wise. You’re sick and tired of guys using you just to get close with your parents and to get a leg in the business your parents are running. 

You stay in the shower for a long time, letting your feelings consume you whole as tears fall. You’re full on sobbing as you clean Jimin’s scent off you, hating how your relationship with Jimin could become so amazing and then fall to the ground again all within three days. Why do bad things keep happening to you? It isn’t fair how you ended up in this messy situation because you’re too damn scared to stand up for yourself against your parents and everyone else in your life.

Jimin is laying in his own bed, thinking about everything that went down tonight. All from the way his stomach had been tingling the entire time while making dinner till the moment you knocked on his door. He had been in awe when he opened the door for you and noticed your casual outfit that lowkey matched his own. He had been staring at your lips throughout dinner, wondering how long it’d be before he would kiss them again because you’re just so kissable. Then he got to have you the way he had imagined since the make out session in his car. The sound of your delicate moans flowing from your lips like a song, the way you’d press yourself against him and kiss him back like nothing else mattered. And then it all came crashing down when your so-called boyfriend called to hear where you were because you weren’t at home in the apartment you share with him.

He had told you to get the hell out of his apartment, not sparing you another glance as he headed into his bedroom and slammed the door after him. He could hear your soft cries as you got dressed in the living room but he was just so angry with you and himself too that he couldn’t even be within himself at all. He cared about you, more than he probably should after such a short time of knowing you, but his mother once told him that when he meets someone special, he’ll know. And he did know. With you.

Perhaps it wasn’t meant to be, you and him. Perhaps it’s for the better and perhaps you’re supposed to be with that boyfriend of yours, even though you did say you were planning on breaking up with him. Jimin sighs deeply as he runs a hand over his face, hating how his mind is constantly thinking about ‘what if’ and ‘what now’. He’s also wondering if you’re okay, if you’re crying yourself to sleep or if you’re even able to sleep at all just like himself.

Turning over onto his side, Jimin closes his eyes and tries his best to fall asleep, hoping you’ll disappear from his mind throughout the night. However, you don’t, you’re all over the place. It’s gonna be a long ass night.

The past few nights and days have been killing you. Seokmin has hogged up the bed, only letting you take your own duvet and pillow to make yourself a camp on the couch. Thankfully, the couch is rather big and comfortable so it’s not really a problem, but you’d prefer your own bed, just not with Seokmin in it. You should’ve known he’d take the bed for himself like the arrogant idiot that he is, but a small part of you had been hoping he’d make an exception this one time considering he’s the problem in this relationship and not you.

You barely see him, only just waking up to the sound of him closing the front door and locking it. He has been going to work earlier than usual the past few mornings and coming home late, probably spending most of his time with his secret girlfriend. You don’t mind his absence anymore, but instead enjoying it as it gives you permission to mope around in your own little world after arriving home from work.

Work has been a disaster, to be honest. Next month's issue of that magazine you’re in charge of is only halfway done and the deadline is arriving a bit too fast for your liking. Jungkook has been giving you these sad smiles while doing his best to cheer you up. He even made Sunhee bake a cake just so he could bring it to you, hoping it’d make your mood just a tad bit better. It didn’t really work but the cake functioned perfectly as comfort food. You had made sure to text Sunhee, telling her how amazing her cake was and that you really appreciated her concern. You just hated being the one receiving pitying looks because you arrived to work looking like a bag of shit. It’s funny how people always end up looking like crap when their love life is going off the rails. 

It’s a late night and you’re on the couch once again, your laptop in your lap as you type away in your notes and doing some editing for the next magazine cover. Seokmin arrives home, barely glancing your way as he makes his way to the bedroom which has become his sacred place after the past couple of days. You’re silently minding your own business, not at all planning on engaging in a conversation with him as he stalks back out and towards you. He plops down beside you, his long body spreading out to fill up most of the couch. You immediately notice the smell of alcohol as he reeks of it. You pay him no attention, hoping he’ll move away again once he catches on to the silence and ignorance you’re offering him.

You scrunch up your nose as he moves closer, the strong smell of liquor invading your senses. You want to throw up, you think to yourself as he moves to sit up, one arm of his slugging around your shoulders. “Seokmin,” you warn when you feel his face nearing the side of yours, “Seokmin…”

The feeling of your heart hammering in your chest is enough to let you know that you’re nervous about what he might do if you let him get any closer. You have never experienced him so affectionate before, not even when you started dating, and the fact that he’s drunk as hell does not sit right with you. “Honey, we should work things out,” he slurs and then hiccups, “fix o-our problems and shit.”

“Please get away from me,” you whisper, slowly inching away from him and his whiskey breath. It isn’t until he wraps his arm around your shoulders entirely, trying to pull you closer, that you elbow him in the stomach. He groans in pain, clutching his stomach which allows you to get out of his grip. “Don’t you dare fucking touch me, you asshole!”

You don’t realize you’re crying until you’re out of his hold, his actions shocking you to an extent you’ve never experienced before. God, how could you be so blind to how he really is? There’s no way this man would ever want the best for you. He’s arrogant and selfish, only using people for his own sake and never giving anything in return. He doesn’t care about anyone but himself and it shows more and more for each day. You whimper as he looks up at you, a sickening scowl on his face as he rests back against the couch. You quickly grab your laptop from beside him and anything else that’s yours from the coffee table. You take a last look at him, your face twisted in disgust.

“Get the fuck out of my apartment,” he snarls, throwing a dismissing hand in your direction. You shake your head in disappointment – not in him, but in yourself. You were so blinded by his good looks and charms around people that you didn’t notice the arrogant and selfish side of him. It’s sad, really, that such an intelligent and successful man ends up being in love with no one but himself and his career. How he got to the top in his job surprises you to no end. They certainly didn’t choose him based on his personality or his ability to work as a team. Seokmin doesn’t know what it means to be a teamplayer, only doing things for himself and no one else.

Without saying another word to him, you bring your things to the bedroom to pack a bag with some necessities; clothes for work, your laptop, your chargers and a toiletries bag with the most necessary things. Seokmin is passed out on the couch once you’re dressed and ready to leave. You take a last glance at him, wanting nothing more than to slap him across the face. “I really fucking hate you, Kim Seokmin.”

The weather is against you as it’s pouring down when you’re making your way to your car. You throw your bag into the passenger seat before turning on the car and heading out of the parking spot, desperate to go somewhere else than here. But where could you possibly go? You don’t have that many friends in Seoul, the only ones being friends of Seokmin as well. You don’t want to trouble Jungkook any further with your misery and you sure as hell can’t drive all the way to Daegu to where your parents are living. 

“Jimin,” you whisper to yourself but then realizing that going there wouldn’t be a good idea. Although you don’t really have anywhere else to go. You could book a hotel room but that’d be a waste of money when there are other opportunities such as, well, Jimin’s place. God, why can’t something good just happen to you for once?

The drive to Jimin’s place feels it’ll never end. The rain is still pouring as you finally park the car in the parking lot. You turn off your car and sit back, watching the front doors to Jimin’s building opening and closing as people arrive and leave as they have places to be. You don’t even know if he’s home. With your luck, he probably isn’t. You decide that taking the chance might be as good as any other decision you can possibly make. You’re drenched in rain once you reach the doorbell, pressing Jimin’s as if you’ve been here multiple times. It rings and rings. You cross your fingers, praying to whoever rules over your life that he’ll answer it and let you up. A sigh of relief falls from your lips as you hear the door being unlocked. You quickly push yourself inside, ignoring how you’re dripping onto the tiles of the lobby and the carpeted floors of the hallway to his apartment once you step out of the elevator.

Jimin is already standing in his doorway, looking at you as you walk up to him. He looks tired, his hair is a mess and the corners of his mouth are turned upside down. You know this is your doing, but you internally hope that the sight of you makes him feel a bit better. Also, there’s a small tingle in your stomach because you’re finally seeing him again, scared you wouldn’t after that unfortunate night almost a week ago.

“I have nowhere else to go,” you quietly say, shrugging weakly as you glance to your soaked sneakers-covered feet. You’re looking utterly defeated as jimin looks at you with those sad and angry eyes as that time he told you to get out of his place when he found out about Seokmin. “All my friends are his friends and my parents live a few hours from here. I’m really sorry to come barging like this-”

“Shut up, will you?” Jimin asks you, chuckling softly, “and get in here before you freeze to death in those wet clothes.”

Smiling softly, you let him take your hand and pull you inside his apartment, closing the door after you. You drop your bag to the floor in the entrance of his home before shrugging off your wet jacket. Jimin takes it and hangs it onto a coat hanger, leaving it to dry. He doesn’t speak much as he wraps his hand around yours again, guiding you into his bedroom and further into his ensuite-bathroom. You stay in the doorway to his big bathroom as he runs a bath. You watch silently, slightly shocked to see that he pulls his sweatshirt over his head, leaving him half-naked in front of you. When you don’t move, he pauses to look at you. 

He softly smiles, motioning you to come closer, “come here.”

You step closer, stopping in front of him. Your heart is hammering inside your chest as he reaches for the hem of your slightly wet t-shirt to pull it over your head, leaving you in just a flimsy bralette. Jimin is careful as he pushes the waistline of your loose-fitting pants down and lets them fall to the floor beneath you, revealing a new pair of lace underwear. This time in a faded pink color. He smirks as he glances up at you, causing you to roll your eyes playfully. The fact that it’s so easy to fall back into things with Jimin says a lot about the two of you and the way you feel about each other, none of you just haven’t mentioned it yet.

Jimin leans down to press a soft kiss to your shoulder as he reaches around you to unclasp the flimsy, lace bralette. You close your eyes momentarily, feeling him leave a few more kisses against your skin as he helps you off with the bra, dropping it to the floor with the rest of your clothes. It’s so intimate, to be undressing each other so carefully while he kisses your skin softly. 

“Missed you so much,” he whispers against your shoulder as he wraps his arms around your naked waist, pulling you in closer. “Been thinking about since you left.”

“I missed you too,” you quietly tell him, arms snaking their way around his neck. You close your eyes as he rests his forehead against yours. It’s silent but a million words are being said within the silence. You pull away just enough to look into his eyes, cupping his cheek with one hand, thumb brushing over his cheek, “let me explain everything to you.”

“Okay,” he whispers back, removing your hand from his cheek to engulf it in his own, resting them against his chest, right above where his heart is beating just for you, “kiss me first?”

You do kiss him, carefully and softly, slowly moving your lips against his like you’ve both been waiting to kiss one another again. That’s the truth, you have been waiting, hoping, that he’d make his way into your life again and that you’d get a chance to explain everything that has been going on in your life the past year or so and how it all changed once he saved you from that embarrassing situation a bit over a week ago. After everything that has happened, you want to believe what you’ve been through has been a journey to get him after all.

[dovahkinniez]

So the lack of Nazir content in this realm really makes me sad. I’ve been thirsting for my favorite brother in the dark brotherhood. Can you give us something anything!?

YES! oh my god. i LOVE this man. let’s get into it!

Remember to not be a silent reader, like and share your thoughts! I love hearing everyone's feedback. <3

NAZIR BF HEADCANONS!

— he’s so underrated.. yet so sexy. why?

ah! screams. okay. so, this god of a man would be the ‘caring yet seemingly intimidating’ boyfriend. as innnn… if you have daddy issues this man is the one for you.

no matter who you are and how powerful, he takes care of you either way. a protector and completely devoted.

he is the ‘i’ll always save you and i’ll die saving you’ type. you’re his religion, you’re his leader and his heart.

even if he doesn’t vocalise these things, he drops the hints when he’s helping you clean up after a bad fight, scolding you for being so reckless, or when he cooks you your favourite meal after an emotionally waring day.

late nights with him are the best, the others asleep while your both sat at the table, he forces you onto his lap (you don’t complain) and both sort through the brotherhood’s work together.

lifting you off and both standing up as he opts to take a small break, which is where he takes you in his arms and dances in the candle light with you. <3

it’s late, you’re both together with nobody else and he thinks you’re the most beautiful thing to ever exist as he sways with his arms wrapped around your waist.

‘i think it’s time for bed..’ with his deep smooth voice. (help his voice is so .. ugh. <333)

never liked ties or attachments, not till you. he takes loyalty seriously, hence why you’re the first person in a long time that he became truly loyal to. definitely not the type to trust so easily, it’s earned.

so you’d expect a friendship with him beforehand, yeah, he might have fancied you. slightly excited when you’d come back, to listen to your stories of your latest kills, to laugh at the jokes you’d both make. or when he’d mask his worry when you’d be gone for awhile, just to come back as happy as ever from whatever adventure you had.

he worried you’d had died in the fire back at the old sanctuary, which caused him to realise he did actually like you… but still. he wouldn’t admit it, not until he was completely sure. of himself, and your own feelings too.

not a jealous man, he’s deadly and he knows you are also, anyone would be stupid to try and force a wedge between you both. plus, if he’s with you, he trusts you. why should he worry?

he is protective, overprotective. not jealous, or possessive.

let’s you clean up his facial hair, he takes good care of it! and allows you to help, especially when he’s too lazy or tired to do it. as his partner you gotta help him look good! (he always does either way..)

random walks around dawnstar, he complains about the cold, the moody people and offish atmosphere but he secretly enjoys you both joking around, as he leans down to your ear, pointing at one of the townsfolk, making a joke as you both begin laughing.

tells you about his past sometimes, random little nuggets of information when something reminds him of his past. tells you about his home place sometimes.

but ultimately says he wouldn’t go back and doesn’t regret anything he’s done because he wouldn’t have met you.

acts like everything that’s happened in his life doesn’t affect him, he’s an assassins, he kills for a living because he likes to do it.. why would he care for anything?

he does. deeply. he thanks everything above and below for keeping both babette and you in his life, and in his own time he grieves all else he’s lost.

lights candles for the departed members sometimes, just to remind him they did once exist and that he does think of them.

sometimes you help him light candles and have small conversations around memories with them. the conversation doesn’t last too long, ‘well.. we better get back to it..’ he’ll say and then go do something to distract him from his own emotions or memories.

but likes to help the brotherhood grow once more, always ready to train up new members.

helps to keep everything set while you’re away, you can always rely on him. for anything. he sends you letters when you’re off for awhile.

the letters usually start off formal, telling you about recent business, new members and then humorous stories and rants about cicero, before he then tells you he misses you and can’t wait for you to return home - into his arms. he’s counting the days and hopes you’ll be able to come back early because he misses you.

worries when you don’t reply so fast, or when you’re gone for long amounts of time. he knows your capable but he’s lost so much, losing you would finish him.

takes you into a huge hug when you come back, outside the sanctuary as he lifts you off your feet because he misses you so much.

definitely dedicates the next few days to you, you do work together, cuddles as much as you can, update each other on everything.

loves listening to you. feeds off your expressions and mannerisms as you tell him your stories and notices all your quirks and smiles as he quietly keeps his eyes on you.

definitely kisses your forehead before sleep. his hands on your cheeks as he kisses your forehead, ‘goodnight, love’. screams!!!!!!

his morning voice is so hot. it’s deep anyway, but in the morning as he stretches and groans out a good morning — PHEW. yeah. yeah. nice.

he’s so hot .. help.

nazir may be a murderer and not a thief, but he definitely stole your heart and the only thing he tends on murdering is your … uhhh yeah. you can decipher that one.

[because-of-a-friend]

Enemies to Lovers!Jeonghan

MASTERLIST

One day I will come up with titles for my works lol. 

Hi Hannah!!!! Thanks for requesting! I loved doing this one! I went ahead and went with Jeonghan cuz I feel like he fits this trope best! Sorry you had to wait so long, this particular fic got deleted like... three times so it was a struggle lol. I hope it’s what you were looking for!

I hope this is a good one, I’m realizing I get real insecure about my writing anytime I’m not doing a bulletpoint or reaction fic, so I don’t feel great about this time. Also I only started recently putting actual detail into my kiss scenes and idk how I’m doing with those???? Like do they seem ok??? Also I feel like I make it so obvious that I am such a sucker for SVT having cute nicknames for siblings, friends, partners, etc in fics lol. Anyways...

Also, I really said: Jeonghan... but in different types of lighting

Remember I don’t own the gif! Link to OP is right there if you want to go give the creator some love!!!

Word Count: 5.2k

Warnings: Mentions eating, reader is using female pronouns (I will keep things gn unless you request differently), I think that’s it, pls let me know if I missed any

You’re not sure exactly how it happened. It was probably just an instance of getting off on the wrong foot, that led to more awkward interactions, giving both of you the wrong impression of each other. You knew this, you could rationalize it all. You were well aware that all it would take was one “I think we might have the wrong idea of each other” conversation and it would all be over. You could easily fix it all, but…

But his stupid smug face. The sarcastic jokes. The never-ending pranks that were not as funny as he thought they were. His ridiculous arrogance. His overall unapologetic nature towards all of it.

You couldn’t help but hate Yoon Jeonghan.

*****

“I don’t know, Wonnie…” you say uneasily over the phone. In previous years, you’d go over to the dorm without hesitation. You loved spending time with your brother and many of the other boys. But ever since you had officially met and begun interacting with Jeonghan…

“C’mon, [Y/N]! I bought that new game you were talking about! We can play it together on my gaming system!” Wonwoo began to persuade. You knew you’d give in; you always did. Your brother was far too sweet a person and far too comforting a presence to reject. The question was how long did you want to argue with him about going to the dorm.

You sighed, accepting defeat early to save time, “I’ll head over there in a bit.”

Wonwoo gives a small cry of victory, “Ok, I’ll have Gyu make extra ramen.” Wonwoo abruptly hangs up the phone right after, leaving you in silence to groan in regret of your decision.

You immediately straighten yourself out, though, trying to put yourself in a mindset of determination. What were you thinking? Just because you and that asshole didn’t get along meant you couldn’t go see your own twin brother without feeling uncomfortable? Screw that! If he wanted to keep the peace then he was going to have to start watching where he stepped around you. 

*****

You knocked loud and clear on the door of their dorm, knowing that with thirteen people living inside, it was usually too noisy for them to hear someone signal their arrival. To your relief, Seungcheol opened the door just moments after you knocked and greeted you with a warm smile followed by a hand sneaking into your hair to ruffle it, “Hey there, kiddo! How’s it hanging?”

“Just fine,” you tilt your head down slightly in his direction as you pass him to enter the dorm. “How are things here?” As soon as you ask, your ears are met with the noise of someone dropping something in the kitchen, followed by Seungkwan crying in alarm.

“Same as always, I supposed,” Seungcheol sighs, but his smile doesn’t fade. “I think Mingyu and Wonwoo are already in the computer room, if you want to go ahead and see them!”

“Ok, thanks Cheol!” you call as you both rush off in different directions, him towards the kitchen and you towards the small room that would provide you solace from the possibility of having to see Yoon Jeonghan.

You were determined not to let things go how they usually did: you with your mouth clamped shut as Jeonghan spoke whatever teasing words he had saved up for you, and the most you can do to fight back is by rolling your eyes and finding any way to get away from him.

This time, you would still avoid contact with him, but if it happened, you’d speak your mind and not care what he thought, since that’s how he treated you.

But there was no sign of him or anyone else as you walked to the computer room. You could hear Mingyu and Wonwoo yelling and cheering at the game long before you opened the door. It was pitch black inside, the piercing light of the screen making you squint your eyes.

The two men inside both turn immediately to check who offended their dark space with the soft, yellow light from the hallway.

“Oh [Y/N], you came!” Mingyu beams up at you. You nod, matching his bright expression.

“How’s the game?” you ask simply, looking up to your brother.

“We like it so far,” Wonwoo’s smile is wide, he always gets excited about new games, whether they’re good or not. He leans over to grab a can of some sort of energy drink before gulping it down. “We left some ramen for you over there on the table. Eat first, then I’ll let you have a turn.”

You roll your eyes, though Wonwoo was only mere minutes older than you, he found those moments to be enough leverage to order you around and act like you should be dependent on his care. There were times when he even referred to himself as “oppa” to you and insisted that you do the same.

Most of the time you let it slide, especially when you weren’t in the mood to argue. However, there were times when you’d pull out the “We’re the same age,” “Even if you’re older, I’m smarter,” or “Don’t boss me around when I’m more mature than you” cards at the drop of a hat.

“Can you at least turn on the LEDs while I eat?” you ask, tip-toeing in the darkness towards the table at the back end of the room. You hear a click before a soft blue glow fills the room, finally giving you a clear view of your path. You pull the bowl of ramen towards you as you sit and resist the urge to comment on how little they left you. The dorm was filled with food anyways, you could find more later if you got hungry again.

Wonwoo and Mingyu begin to eagerly tell you what they like about the game as you eat. You listen happily, feeling safe in the presence of your brother and friend.

Then of course…

“Hey you two, Cheol wanted me to remind you that we have to get up early tomorrow,” you can’t help the sour expression that comes over your face as Jeonghan enters the room to speak to Wonwoo and Mingyu. “Oh, hey there cutie, I didn’t know you were here!” His smirk makes you sick.

“Don’t call me that,” you say bitterly into the nearly empty bowl.

Wonwoo looks nervously between you and his bandmate, well aware of the dislike you have for him. He’s grateful that you’ve always kept it so civil, but still feels bothered by the unrest between you.

Jeonghan lets out a little giggle in response, and Wonwoo feels a tug in the pit of his stomach, he wishes Jeonghan wouldn’t be so hard on you sometimes. He knows his hyung doesn’t mean anything by it, but you…

You feel your heart sink as Jeonghan steps fully into the room, striding to sit across from you at the table. You can only stare in wonder at his audacity as he slides the bowl towards himself and finishes off the ramen in one bite.

“I was eating that,” you try to keep your tone measured, attempting to keep within the balance of standing up for yourself but not starting any drama that would affect the boys.

“Go make more if you’re hungry, then,” Jeonghan says casually, making your anger positively flare.

You don’t even give your brother the chance to mediate, jumping up from your place and leaving the room, wanting to be anywhere but around that prick.

*****

“You’re leaving already?” Mingyu pouts at you.

“Gyu, I’ve been here for hours,” you laugh, stretching out your fingers as they start to prick from pain of slamming into a keyboard for so long. You had returned to the computer room but only after Jeonghan left. Part of you had wished you had done more to confront him; another part was glad you didn’t start a fight and put Wonwoo in an awkward position. “Besides all of you, as well as me have to get up early tomorrow, it’s already late. I need to get back home.”

“You can stay here,” Wonwoo was quick to offer.

You shook your head at him, “Then I’ll just have to get up even earlier, I’ll go back to my place.” Wonwoo nods almost reluctantly, standing to walk you out.

All of you run into Joshua on your way to the front door, he turns out to be the only one smart enough to ask how you got there.

“Oh, I took the bus,” you say slowly, knowing this is about to cause issues.

“Well, the last one would have already stopped running by now,” Mingyu says looking at the time on his phone.

“I’ll give you a ride,” Josh offers immediately.

You bring your hands up to shake them back and forth, “No, no, I can find a way home, you all need to go to bed.”

“[Y/N],” Wonwoo speaks up immediately in that stern voice you hate but also can’t help but listen to, “let Josh take you home. It’s either that or you stay here, I won’t have you walking around alone at night.” Wonwoo waits a moment to gauge your expression. He finally nods affirmatively, before speaking directly to Joshua, “Take her home, please.”

Joshua nods before walking off to grab his keys. You and Wonwoo send Mingyu off to bed. Once you’re alone, your brother pulls you in for a tight hug. “Do you want me to say something to him?” he asks lowly.

You shake your head, “I don’t want to cause any problems with you guys.” You sit in silence for a moment. “Come and stay over with me sometime, I miss our sleepovers.”

Joshua comes back and Wonwoo pulls away, “Thanks, hyung. Please get her home safe.” For the second time that night, your hair gets ruffled before your brother disappears to go off to bed.

The ride home with Joshua is comfortable. He speaks kindly to you and makes you smile.

You begin to wonder how amongst all these angels, there exists a person like Yoon Jeonghan.

*****

Wonwoo used the new game as leverage to guilt you into coming over quite often in the following weeks. You hadn’t realized how much you had limited your time at the dorm until you started going consistently once more. It was nice being able to spend time with the boys again. You hated that Jeonghan had become such an unbearable presence that it affected your relationship with the rest of your friends.

But ever since you had started to stand your ground and talk back, he had finally begun to avoid you. You supposed it was only fun for him when you sat there and took it.

It didn’t stop the two of you from bickering when you saw each other, but now both of you preferred to avoid each other instead of Jeonghan seeking you out to tease you.

The following weeks of visiting were fairly comfortable. Whenever Jeonghan wasn’t around, you got to spend plenty of time with the other boys and your brother. Plus, the new video game was even better than expected.

Jeonghan’s presence slowly became uncomfortable in a different way.

Instead of being smug and overbearing, he became strangely quiet around you. His facial expressions became more serious as he sent genuine glares your way before letting out bitter remarks and going on his way.

It made you even angrier.

Who the hell was he to torture you all this time and then act like a kicked puppy when you finally fought back???

Your anger and his bitterness slowly escalated the tension between you two. Although they were happening less frequently, the arguments between you became more serious and almost hurtful.

Whatever, you told yourself, he could do as he pleased, you wouldn’t let it affect you anymore.

*****

You stared down at your phone screen. Why? Why did it have to be here, while you were at the dorm?

The call was only five minutes. They didn’t even do it in person. Of course, they had warned that because of hard times, there’d be lay-offs soon. But they couldn’t even do it in person? And all you got was a simple “Sorry, come collect your things on Monday”??? You were a hard worker, passionate about the job, more efficient than most of your coworkers and this is how they treated you???

A part of you could’ve guessed, many of the employees your age had gotten in because of nepotism. But you didn’t want to believe that they’d just brush off all your years of hard work just to avoid stepping on the toes of higher-ups who had relative connections hired at the company.

You squatted against the wall of the hallway, still too in shock to move.

So, you simply sat in silence, for what seemed like forever.

“You good?” you had never felt worse than the exact moment his voice reached your ears.

“Go away,” you said sternly, knowing you’d be crying soon.

“Geez, forgive me for asking,” Jeonghan responds before turning to walk away. He stops abruptly after you sniffle. “So, you’re not ok?”

“No offense, Jeonghan,” you say hating the way your voice is shaking, “but you are the last person I want to speak to right now.”

There’s a heavy silence for a long moment. You silently pray that he’ll just leave. “Do you want me to get your brother?” he asks lightly.

You shake your head, “No, I don’t want to ruin the mood. I’m going to go home, just tell him I had a stomach ache.” You push yourself up and begin to walk briskly towards the door.

To your surprise, Jeonghan reaches out to stop you. You stare at his hand wrapped around your arm and wonder if you’ve ever even allowed him to touch you before. “It’s already late, let me give you a ride.”

You pull his hand off of you, “No, thanks.” You grab your coat and start to dig around in your purse to make sure you have all of your belongings.

“[Y/N],” Jeonghan’s voice rings clear in your head despite your brain feeling fuzzy. You don’t want to look at him. Who is this person that’s showing concern and speaking kindly? You don’t like it. It feels fake. It feels like a predator playing with a wounded prey. You’re just waiting for him to laugh or make a remark or do anything to make you feel worse than you already do.

But Jeonghan simply grabs the keys laying on the front table, grabs your arm once more, and leads you out to the car.

*****

The ride is suffocatingly silent. You wished he’d at least turn on some music to cover up the sound of your crying, but you remained in the quiet. You rolled down your window and stuck your head out, letting the warm night air and sound of wind comfort you. Since you were turned away from him completely, you didn’t see Jeonghan glancing over at you throughout the drive.

You couldn’t have left that car faster when you finally pulled up to your apartment.

To your dismay, Jeonghan also gets out, apparently intent on walking you up.

“You don’t have to-” you start but abruptly stop when he gives you a look telling you an emotion you don’t quite understand.

Jeonghan finally speaks when you’re riding the elevator up to your floor, “I don’t really mean it, you know.”

“Mean what?” you say weakly, starting to feel the exhaustion from crying so much.

“When I talk to you like that… I mean when I’m… rude,” he trails off, running a hand through his hair. “Usually it’s just teasing, but obviously I went too far with you. And I didn’t realize it until you started showing how upsetting it was for you. I should’ve known before that, though.”

“You seemed ruder after I started talking back,” you say, confused.  

“I was just being petty and defensive. I kept telling myself things like: It’s her fault, isn’t it? She should have made it more clear from the beginning that it was upsetting her. How was I supposed to know? But that was just me being immature, I should’ve just talked to you.”

“Is that an… apology, Yoon Jeonghan?” you ask, letting yourself be a little smug.

For the first time, you get a genuine smile out of him, “Maybe.”

There’s more silence for a second.

“It’s a two-way road, though,” you say finally.

“What do you mean?” he asks.

“I mean, I could have also come and talked to you instead of letting things escalate,” you say. “I played some part in all of this… unpleasantness. You can’t entirely blame yourself.”

Jeonghan smiles again, reaching out to ruffle your hair the way Seungcheol always did. Then he takes a dramatic deep breath and rolls his shoulders, “There! That feels better, doesn’t it? We can finally be friends!”

You roll your eyes in a playful manner, but you feel it too, a weight has been lifted.

*****

Wonwoo showed up at your door in the middle of the night that night. You took one look at his frantic face and groaned, “I told Jeonghan I would tell you myself.”

“You should have told me immediately!” your brother pouts as he passes you to walk into your apartment.

“I didn’t want to worry you so late, especially when all of you were having a good time. I was going to tell you tomorrow,” you close the door behind him. You watch as he turns on the TV and starts picking through your pantry. “Hmmm, yes it seems quite clear that you came here out of concern for me,” you can’t help but use a sarcastic tone.

Wonwoo sends a glare your way as he grabs snacks and settles on the couch. You sit next to him, grabbing your fair share of the food. You try to keep your attention on the show, but the feeling of Wonwoo staring straight at you is distracting.

“I’m fine, you don’t have to worry,” you sigh.

“Really? Because Jeonghan described you as an emotional wreck,” your brother scoffs.

“I was just shocked and upset. I’ll be ok. I have a good resume, I can find a new job,” you insist.

“I keep telling you, you don’t have to work-”

“I don’t care how much you make,” you interrupt. “I’m not going to depend on you. It’ll just make trouble for both of us.”

“Will you at least let me help out if there’s any problems before you find a new job?” Wonwoo kicks at your leg.

“Like I would even tell you if I was having trouble,” you return his kick.

“You just can’t help but be difficult,” your brother complains quietly.

You let the sound of the show take over the room for a few minutes. “I do have good news,” you finally speak up, wanting to give your brother some peace of mind about something. “Me and Jeonghan made up. We figured it out.”

Wonwoo bolts upright with a grin on his face, “Really??? It’s really all good now?”

“100%,” you say, unable to stop yourself from pinching your brother’s cheeks, finding his excited expression cute.

“Let’s celebrate soon then! We can have a big gaming party with all of the boys!” You agree to your brother’s proposal. You feel content in this moment, knowing you’ll wake up in the morning in an uncomfortable position, immediately kick at his legs and tell him to get his stinky feet away from you.

*****

Your time at the dorm increases with the weight of you and Jeonghan’s rivalry being gone. You’re enjoying getting to know him as a friend instead of constantly walking on eggshells around him. Going to visit the boys is once again a happy and comfortable experience.

You hadn’t realized how much Jeonghan had affected you until you two had worked things out. The world felt light again and you could breathe, no longer in constant worry of possibly ruining things between your brother and his bandmates.

You hoped things would remain without complications for a long time.

*****

“Seungkwan, you should come with us!” you begged. “The carnival only comes once a year; you can’t miss it!”

“But it’s so crowded and there are screaming kids everywhere,” Seungkwan complains.

“Oh, whatever,” Soonyoung interjects. “You love it every time we go.”

Seungkwan gives Soonyoung a look that has you laughing through your mouthful of ramen. “Oh, shoot,” you say feeling liquid start to dribble down your chin. “Can I get a napkin?”

“Here’s one,” you hear Jeonghan’s voice as he enters the room. You reach out to grab the napkin as Seungkwan and Soonyoung continue bickering. But instead of handing it to you, Jeonghan extends his hand not holding the napkin towards you. His fingers come to lightly touch your chin and turn you towards him. Jeonghan wipes your face with the napkin himself, taking the time to make sure it’s really all clean. “All better,” he smiles at you, running his thumb across your chin to check its cleanliness one last time.

As Jeonghan walks away, you turn to see if Seungkwan or Soonyoung saw what had happened. They were still arguing, though. The boys showing you physical touch or affection wasn’t really all that uncommon. But for some reason, the way Jeonghan had grabbed your chin just now… Why was your heart beating so hard?

*****

You couldn’t stop yourself from dragging Wonwoo all over the carnival. It was nice to get out in this environment, the lights, the laughter, the food, the games, the rides. You wanted to do everything, but not before you looked at all there was and took in the spectacle.

You could hear all the boys laughing excitedly behind you, you knew they’d want to try everything as well. You shook your head at Seungkwan’s bright expression, you couldn’t wait to play the ‘I told you so’ card later.

The night was a blur. All of you ran from games to rides to snacks and then all over again.

You couldn’t help but stop completely in your tracks as you passed a booth with a giant stuffie of your favorite animal as a prize. Your fascination with the plushie doesn’t go unnoticed.

“You want me to win it for you?” Jeonghan’s voice is suddenly speaking right into your ear. You jump after realizing he was right behind you. You grip your cotton candy a bit tighter and shyly nod. The way Jeonghan grins at you fills you with warmth.

You watch him walk over to the booth. His light hair and pink shirt were illuminated by the soft glow of the surrounding lights. Jeonghan takes his wallet out and hands some bills to the vendor. You step up closer to stand next to him as he plays the game. He laughs as he chats back and forth with the vendor. You watch in awe as Jeonghan clears the game, no problem.

“Anything from the top shelf!” the vendor exclaims happily.

“That one please,” Jeonghan points right at the stuffie you had been staring at.

“It’ll be a wonderful memory for your girlfriend,” the vendor smiles as he hands the prize directly to you.

“Oh, I’m-”

“Of course!” Jeonghan interrupts you almost instantly, wrapping an arm around your shoulders and starting to pull you away from the game. “We’ll cherish it for a long time! Thanks for the game!” The vendor waves kindly as you two walk away. After a moment, Jeonghan pulls his arm off of you, “Sorry, sometimes it’s just easier to agree than explain, you know?” You nod in agreement. “Wait a second,” he stops you by putting his hands on your shoulders and standing in front of you. Before you can ask what’s wrong, his hand comes up towards your face as it had earlier that day. He quickly swipes his thumb across your lips before pulling to back to show you remnants of your cotton candy. “Do you always eat this messily?” he grins and then, to your surprise, puts his thumb in his mouth to clean it off.

You stand there, frozen, unable to really comprehend what just happened as Jeonghan walks away towards the other boys.

“For the second time today?” Soonyoung is suddenly standing next to you.

“So you did see what happened earlier!” you exclaimed, hitting his arm lightly. “It was weird, right?!”

“Can’t tell yet,” Soonyoung replies cocking his head to the side and putting his hands in his pocket. “Sometimes Jeonghan is just sort of naturally flirtatious. But I’m not sure about you. I figured since you two didn’t get along at first, it’d take him awhile to warm up to you at that level. He seemed to get comfortable with you quite quickly.” Soonyoung turns and shrugs at you after his words.

“You’re no help at all,” you say emotionlessly. There’s a pause before both you and Soonyoung slowly look at each other and laugh at your quip.

You decide to brush off your new concerns about Jeonghan and enjoy this night with the boys. The vendor was right, it was a good memory, and you’re sure it’d last you for your whole lifetime.

*****

You hate yourself a bit for it, but you once again seem to be avoiding Jeonghan. He had made you so nervous that day, and the way your heart pounded… You didn’t want to get sucked into having a silly crush on him if he wasn’t actually trying to flirt with you.

No, from now on, interactions with Jeonghan would be friendly but short and appropriate.

You were stupid to think he wouldn’t notice.

It wasn’t long before there came a night when Jeonghan insisted that he be the one to give you a ride home. You couldn’t help the way your nerves spiked at his determination to be the one to take you. You knew he most likely wanted to talk to you about your sudden distance from him.

The ride itself was nice, Jeonghan rolled the windows down for you, remembering that you enjoyed the warm night air of summer. You talked comfortably with one another. Jeonghan was always able to make you smile so easily.

You couldn’t stop yourself from staring at him. He was just wearing a t-shirt and sweats but… His blonde hair being illuminated in the moonlight as he ran his hands through it and his bright smile as he laughed...

He really was beautiful.

Once again, Jeonghan came with you to walk you to your door. And once again, he finally spoke up in the elevator, “You’ve been avoiding me, sweetheart.” Your heart drops to your stomach at the nickname. “Is everything ok? Did I do something to make you mad again?”

You quickly shake your head and pull your hands up to shake them as well, “No! Not at all!”

“You sure?” he insists.

“Yoon Jeonghan, you really don’t think I’d tell you if you did?” you say.

He giggles, “Yeah, that’s true. You’d let me know the moment I messed up, wouldn’t you?” The elevator dings and opens up to your floor. You and Jeonghan step out together. “Is everything else ok, then? You don’t start avoiding people for no reason.”

You nod as casually as possible, “Everything is great.” Your tone isn’t convincing and Jeonghan nudges you. “I guess, I just got… nervous? I mean one moment we were like enemies and then the next we were suddenly really… close, and-”

“I made you uncomfortable?” Jeonghan’s voice is slightly panicked.

“No, you did nothing wrong! It’s all on me, I just got caught up in my emotions and-” you stop abruptly when you realize what you were about to do.

Jeonghan nods quietly as if to say he understands, but what it is he understands, you’re not sure. “Is it ok for us to remain close, or do you want me to back off?”

“I don’t want any more distance between us, but…” you trail off.

“But, what?” he prompts you again.

“I don’t want to get the wrong idea about anything…” you say, finally reaching your door.

Jeonghan watches as you slowly unlock your door and push it open, “You haven’t gotten the wrong idea about anything.” He avoids eye contact when you look up at him.

You’re shocked by his forwardness. But once he voices his thoughts out loud, you once again feel the feeling of a weight being lifted.

Jeonghan gestures for you to step inside, catching your arm once you fully pass him. He pulls you back to him, close enough for him to lean in and leave a quick kiss on your cheek, “Night, babe, I’ll see you later.”

You stand there, completely still, staring at your door that had shut closed in front of you. You can feel heat rise from the tip of your toes all the way up to your ears. You finally let yourself fall into a squatting position, covering your face with your hands, and letting out a squeal.

*****

Jeonghan invites you to meet up outside of the dorm. It’s a cute little coffee shop at a quiet part of the city. You’re already sitting when he walks in. Maybe one day, you won’t be completely caught off guard by his beauty… but today is not that day.

His whole person is bathed in the glow of the early morning light as he approaches you, the softest, most genuine smile gracing his face.

“No, don’t get up,” he says when you try to leave your chair, “I need to go off and order anyways.” Jeonghan leans down to kiss your forehead firmly. “I just wanted to come say hi first,” he whispers, holding your face close to his.

Your first date sets a wonderful precedent to the rest of your relationship. Jeonghan gets your heart racing with flirty comments and sweet touches. But he also makes you feel calm and content, easily keeping a smile on your face. You just feel… good throughout it all.

You insist on walking him back to the dorm, since they had schedules that day.

“So, we’ll be doing this again?” Jeonghan asks hopefully, as you reach the front door.

“Definitely,” you nod enthusiastically up at him, wondering how you had ever managed to despise the man that made you feel so whole and happy.

Jeonghan looks utterly happy and a tiny bit nervous as he stares down at you. His hand reaches up to brush back your hair before settling firmly against your face. Jeonghan looks at you so fondly as he leans in. His lips connect to yours… so softly… so sweetly. You can feel his nose nudge against your face to push it into a preferred position. He pulls back slightly after every little kiss to let out laughter so sweet, it sounds like it should be coming from the mouth of an angel. But he’s never far away for long, reconnecting to you quickly every time. You let him take the lead, allowing his lips to take care of yours, giving them the sweetest kind of attention. He pulls back for a moment longer to nuzzle his nose against yours, an action that has you gripping his shirt to keep him close. His hands keep themselves entertained by running across your face or through your hair.

He’s going back in to kiss you once again when he front door of the dorm opens, leaving you caught in the act. Wonwoo stares at you two for a long moment before making a single comment that causes you and Jeonghan to laugh.

“You know, when I said I wanted you two to have a better relationship, this isn’t exactly what I meant.”

[muite]

Protective boyfriend Baji !

» fluff w/ sweet boyfie kei (1.5k)

Study dates were always quiet with your boyfriend, baji keisuke who was actually known for being a loud and kinda dumb person was always so good to you during these times, taking your study dates very seriously

being neighbors was a great thing for you both, being that the reason why you met each other in the first place, both of you living with only your mothers and you with your cat, who one day went missing and it wasn't until afternoon that baji knocked on your door asking if he was yours and if he could come visit him

safe to say he managed to snatch himself a tutor who was more than able to explain to him the things he didn't understand one, two or three times while being completely patience with him, over time the two of you confessed your feelings to each other and then eventually started dating

this evening though you were explaining something different to him

"hah? what do you mean some fuckers are billing you?"

"it's bullying baji-kun"

tickling your arm he blushed before murmuring an embarrassed "shut up" putting a hand on his neck and rubbing it "what were they even bullying you for?"

"they made fun of me for my glasses, they said I looked funny"

recently you had been having constant headaches and after going for a quick check up you found out you needed reading glasses, they said the headaches were produce of you squinting too hard, so now here you are explaining all the current events happening in your school life to your boyfriend

"fuck that, you look georgess"

"it actually is gorgeous baji-kun"

"I don't give a shit, you're going home with me tomorrow"

"we don't even go to the same school"

"I'll go to yours!"

seeing you smile made him feel all dizzy inside and he'll be damned if he didn't protect your smile at all costs

"then I'll be waiting for you"

"you better cause I don't wanna get lost"

laughing softly at him you said "you won't"

at 5pm sharp he was waiting at the entrance of your school, watching dozens of students leave to finally go to their homes

but none of them were you

so already feeling irritated he decided to go looking for you, walking down the halls of the large institution many people looked at him when he passed by them, surely thinking he was some sort of freak or something cause clearly that wasn't their school's uniform

finally arriving at your class he saw the two doors closed, he thought he would wait a few minutes, that is until he heard muffled voices and mocking laughs coming from the classroom he knew you studied in

"there's some guys in my class that have been bullying me"

baji's instincts told him to slam the door open and pondering too much, that's exactly what he did

he saw four guys surrounding you as another one had your glasses in one hand above your head, the five of them were laughing at your "give it back!" while tossing the said glasses between them

"but were having such a great time y/n-chan!"

just as the leader of the group said that a fist collided with his cheek making him lay flat on the ground

the remaining 4 guys and you scrambled to see who had knocked the living shit out of the strongest guy in your class, only to find a nerd looking guy with slicked back hair wearing some really big glasses

the right hand of the leader walked up to the nerdy guy with a threatening look in his eyes

"oi damn nerd did you do thi-"

before he can finish the question a fist sent him to the ground, laying down just beside his leader

your wide eyes watched with amazement as the nerdy guy kicked the five of your bully's asses, as he knocked down the last one your mind started questioning who the nerdy guy was

"damn fuckers, making me fight in school didn't even let me change"

hearing that familiar annoyed deep growling voice your impossibly wide eyes went even wider

"baji-kun?! what are you doing here?!"

"looks like you forgot I told you I would be walking you home today y/n"

smiling sheepishly at him you said "ah.. yeah I did..."

though it was obvious why you didn't go meet him as you promised

seeing how your embarrassed face couldn't even look at him right now, he softened the scowl on his face waking over to you before grabbing your face in the most delicate way he could asking

"these idiots gave you a hard time? they didn't injure my girl anywhere right?"

cheeks heating up in his hands made him smile, he loved how adorable you were, always giving him the cutest reactions at the bare minimum of what you called "his boyfriend material side"

"hm, just them messing with my glasses and pulling my hair"

"oh right, were are them?"

hearing him ask that reminded you of the issue at hand: your glasses

"ah, I remember hiroshi-san was the last one with them in hand-"

"oi hiroshi stand up"

you knew your boyfriend was in a gang and that he had been in numerous fights with many people, you even had to patch him up many of the times he's gotten in trouble and didn't want his mom to worry

but this was completely different, seeing him, being this dangerous and demanding made you feel some type of way, you knew he was strong both in attitude and strength, but even so you couldn't stop but gawk at him being this amazing

hiroshi stood up and when he did you saw that with the fall he had landed on your brand new glasses, glasses that now laid in millions pieces with a crooked frame

you felt yourself pout and with a trembling heart you stepped to gather them in your hands but before you could touch them baji stopped you

"stand up, the five of you"

hiroshi and his friends quickly made a circle around baji, completely in his hands at the fear of the said guy beating them to unconsciousness

"all of you, every single one are going to pay for her glasses" the guys looked at each other nodding their heads unable to form words with their mouths "five times"

"hah?!"

"you bastards have a problem?"

seeing baji's threatening stare made them swallow hard, bowing down and muttering a quiet "no"

"by the end of the week I want y'all to have already paid her the... prize was it y/n?"

"p-price baji-kun"

"-paid her the price and if you don't just know that I'll be hunting down every single one of you" and after ending them a dirty look he grabbed your hand and started walking towards the door as if nothing happened

"I didn't know you could pull of glasses baji-kun"

"shut up it makes me smarter"

you couldn't help the laugh escaping your lips at that statement

the two of you were walking towards your apartment complex hand in hand, baji letting his long hair loose and putting his glasses in a little pouch into his bag

"-and didn't I already told you to stop calling me baji? I'm your boyfriend, call me keisuke or kei-kun, some cheesy shit"

"it's disrespectful"

"I call you y/n all the time"

"but you're simply you, baji-kun"

"what the hell does that even mean?"

after laughing you smiled softly at him, he was really sweet and a really good boy, even going to the lengths of beating five guys for bullying you

feeling how the grip on his hand tightened he looked over his shoulder to catch your stare, you looked troubled and your wobbly lips told him something wasn't right "you ok?"

with a hand you pulled his tie down, his face coming closer to you and finally closing the distance with a sweet kiss

his beating heart let you dictate the path of the kiss, soft sigh leaving his lips as one hand grabbed the side of your face, so soft he thought to himself as your lips molded his, some few minutes passed and then you pulled away from him

"I love you kei-kun, thank you for everything"

his soft gaze on you let you know that he was starting to feel flustered and with a soft tone he replied "idiot, you don't have to thank me"

you loved dork adorable baji at times like these

grabbing your hand he continued walking down the street

"wanna eat at my house? your mom can come too, then we'll go to yours while they're together" smirking down at you he said in a low suggesting voice "that way you can pay the prize to me for saving you"

"it actually is price kei-kun"

"way to kill the moment y/n"