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#(( this is gonna last til sunday. ))
real-life-cloud · 11 months
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I found an old fidget spinner and I've been using it (it's been very nice ^_^) but I forgot !!!! It's glow in the dark !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
#the sky speaks#literally incredible#its nice for restless energy tho i hav so much of it rn i wanna hop skip n jump#just saw my mom a couple hrs ago#it went good !#shes doing okay in the rehab place. better than the last place she went to but theres atill been drama#and theyre pretty understaffed#but nice :)#my weekedn is PACKED!!#tomorrow i work at the zoo then friday im going to fright night#then saturday is visitation for mom again and afterwards is thomas and carries bday party#then Sunday im going to thomas and carries AGAIN to play minecraft togwther#OH and friday i also am going to my moms job#next weekend is packed too dear gdo#and i wanted to open commissions gdi. not gonna happen for a while im afraid#maybe in december ?#ive barely been drawing#too busy#not enough energy to be creative. mainly been playing chill games and reading fanfic ij my downtime#oh i also had my last session w my therapist today! shes having her baby soon so i wont see her til after the new year.... kinda sad tbh#i came out to her as trans last week and we talked abt it some today tho!!! it was rly nice i had never talked abt it out loud before#felt lighter afterwards. she told me to write down everything so i can organize my thoughts better when i tell my parents#bc i wanna tell them at some point. i RLY want a breast reduction dear god. and ive gone back and forth on hrt. still contemplating it#sometimes dad will call me his 'favorite son' as a joke when i help with like. yard work or handy stuff. makes me happy#he sorta knows im gender fluid but not totally?#im juat rambling at this point. goodnight everybody 😴
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god i cannot WAIT to have a desk again
#you mean i can put all of my art stuff ??? in one place???? and its easy to find and i know whwre everything is??????#oh my godddddd#hiiiiiii my beloved mutuals#my apartment is going excellent#i . really like it. which feels crazy. i have my own space again anf its actually like.... comfortable#or like. kind of comfortable. theres still boxes everywhere. but im WORKING ON IT#and i dont start work til sunday so like!!! i have all week!!!!!!#i get to watch youtube on the tv again.... i get to have space to move around and decorate again......#theres soooo much natural light in here augh#I HAVE A FIREPLACE. I HAD A FIRE IN MY FIREPLACE LAST NIGHT HOW CRAZY IS THAT. IN AN APARTMENT !!!!!!!!!!!!!#apparently thats like???? a standard thing for a lot of places here bc the winters get really snowy and cold but it makes me feel so fancy#my brother is visiting today and hes bringing my box of christmas decorations ohhh its gonna be so comfy cozy in here#anyway my desk gets delivered this afternoon and then i have to put it together etc etc BUT LIKE !!!!!! SO SOON#aaaughghghgh. im soooo so so hoping and praying that this job works out because im kind of in love with it here#i got a library card this morning.... the local library is GORGEOUS . and HUGE .#and i wrnt grocery shopping and didnt want to immediately die ???????????#i think thay is a good sign . i think i am in a good place. maybe .#i dont wanna speak too soon bc i Do still have to like my job but . maybe !!!! maybe there is hope for me after all
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sad--tree · 1 year
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impulsively ordered a new pair of boots bc i saw shoefreaks had a pair of demonias on clearance sale in my size (!) and like. do i need another pair of platform boots? absolutely not and these weren't even on my wishlist but fuckit they're cool and at the moment i need every tiny shred of Something Good To Look Forward To after wrestling with my godforsaken java assignment for hours and getting absolutely fucking nowhere. the Death And Doom And Perpetual Academic and Professional and Personal Failure Spiral is real folks and if some 5" platform heels are what puts the brakes on said spiral in2 the Bottomless Pit of Despair well then so be it
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opens-up-4-nobody · 1 year
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...
#focus who? i dont kno her#its so bad. i csnt focus at all. and ive got way too much to do. take me back to last week where i spent hours reading papers#annoying. also possibly lack of sleep cstching up with me#do u ever get very little sleep and not miss it at all? yea bitch all the time. then i get depressed and its sleepy time#and by sleepy time i mean i get like 8hrs of sleep lol#maybe ill just do nothing and completely fuck over my sunday lol#maybe i should go run up thr mountain rn before im stuck in a car for 2 hrs#bc im getting spikes of being insane. unfortunately i have no emotional object permanence so when i feel crazy its like#ive always felt like this ans its terrible forever. and then immediately afterward im like lol wot? nah im fine. ive always been fine#shout out to mood swings ✌️ like bro im trying to get materials together so i can teach a class. can u shut the fuck up? and focus?#well see how i do today with a ton of socializing. itll b fine. im normal i can b normal#or i can b endearing quirky. or whatever i usually i am. i dont think i have conversations like a normal person but i cant tell bc im not#there for conversations im not in. whatever everyone else has conversations in a way thats boring. i just wanna grill ppl til i understand#how they work. and then feel like im gonna die if im in a group conversation 🙃 let me study thr ppl around me#bc im very normal. god. i promise irl im not that weird. ppl think im nice and cool and successful#ok maybe not cool. but i think i can get away with being interesting. i got at least a lil charisma. im only a bit horribly awkward ;-]#but i try to own it. wtf was i saying. jesus. i cant with my brain rn. i shoulf have gone for a run this morning#being social just makes me anxious so im babbling i guess. but itll b fun. and itll b pretty im sure#maybe ill try to draw my ocs while im not paying attention. ive neglected them for so long 😭#unrelated
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mythvoiced · 1 year
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-. not to post about fking sh.erl.ock in the year of our Lord & Saviour ND Stevenson 2023 but exclusive english speakers will never understand the linguistics based gasp-gutpunch-tearsinmyeyes of the scene where john asks homebaby to be his best man because if you watch the show in German when Sherlock asks 'i'm your best friend?' the 'you' John uses in his answer ('you are') is informal as the first time in the whole show they switched to 'du' rather than continuing to use the formal 'Sie' and it's such a beautiful dialogue choice i think about it every time i mourn the lack of differentiation between a formal and an informal 'you' in English
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vetteldixon · 2 years
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been having a hard time deciding what exactly to post for the anniversary, but i’m sitting on a bevy of quotes and vids and, idk, insight generally after hyperfixating on multi 21 this week if you want to send an ask/request? no stupid questions, the more specific the better--i can do hot takes, delve into technical stuff about actual racing, describe vibes. or just yeet up sourced shit
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The executive dysfunction is never more apparent than when im trying to do a thing that I need to be doing and have a deadline for
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gctchell · 5 months
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Gives Niffty the Tipsy bartender version of a grasshopper.
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Oo.
Oo.
OO.
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".. Nooope, nope nope nope, I can't risk getting totally schnockered before the big event! I'm gonna just.. put this in the veeeery back of the meat locker." No one will discover her secret big tub of alcoholic goodness there, right? She's picking it up and she's running off to the kitchen! She'll just take scoops of it every now and then.. Yeaaaah. Yeeeeah.
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neon-danger · 2 years
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this chapter is so fucking cute I wanna post it so bad
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hippolotamus · 4 months
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Sentence Sunday ✨
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I can show you lies 'Cause I'm a real tough kid, I can handle my shit They said, "Babe, you gotta fake it 'til you make it" and I did Lights, camera, bitch smile, even when you wanna die I was grinning like I'm winning, I was hitting my marks 'Cause I can do it with a broken heart
Beloved mutuals and pocket pals... I honestly don't know what to say for myself. This is a case of 'I listened to a song too much, I had an idea I knew I was never gonna write' turned 'I'll just throw it out as a prompt' --> 'I'll just make a moodboard' --> 'Oh god, I've written over 1k words in place of a summary'. SO. Have... whatever this is, T Swift influenced Buddie actor au. Under the cut to save your dash.
Honestly, if the world still exists in the morning, Eddie Diaz doesn't really give a fuck. His girlfriend left, claiming he's still not over his late wife, and his teenage son, the last thread connecting him to said wife, went to go live with his grandparents. After, of course, blaming Eddie for pushing 'yet another one' away. Christopher wouldn't even look at him before he went.
Then there's Anita Mills, his agent, who is probably a few blood pressure points away from a stroke at this point. Assuming she doesn't fire him first.
Let her, he thinks, grabbing a bottle of Maker's Mark from the cabinet. He has a string of blockbuster films to his name, not to mention a commendable collection of Oscar's and Emmy's. Not that they made his parents proud or kept his wife from leaving him before she died. But they exist as proof that he's had a successful career. Between investments and liquid assets he has more money than he would know what to do with in a hundred lifetimes. So, fuck it.
Eddie breaks the wax seal and twists off the red cap. He doesn't even bother with a glass, not really seeing a need. He's never been a big drinker, but lately his tolerance has grown considerably. Indulging until he passes out seems like an ideal use of his time right now anyway. If he wakes up after? Well, he'll consider that a success.
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"Hey! What the hell?!" Eddie manages, coughing and trying not to choke on the ice cold water hitting his body. He opens his eyes to see Mills towering over him, glowering and holding an empty vase. He swipes a hand across his face. "Seriously, Anita, what the fuck was that?"
"I don't know, Eddie, you tell me." She disappears for less than a minute, returning with a hand towel she unceremoniously drops on his chest. "Help me out here. What's today?"
He wriggles himself to something resembling sitting and leans back against the coffee table. "What's today?" He parrots back dumbly.
Anita crosses her arms and quirks an eyebrow. "I asked you first."
Today, today, today. Where was he supposed to be- "Shit! The interview with, uh, fuck." He snaps his fingers and racks his brain trying to remember a name or a face. All he knows is they're important.
"Claudette Collins. Very good, Eddie, you got it part way."
"Give me ten minutes, I'll put myself together and we can go," he says, fighting the violent wave of nausea that hits as he scrambles to stand up.
"Save your poor carpet from getting puked on and sit the hell down."
"What? No, I can-"
"Eddie," Anita interjects, "the interview was five hours ago. The interview with the Claudette Collins. The one that took me months of phone calls, groveling and cashing in favors to get for you."
Fuck. "Anita, I'm so sorry. How-"
"Save it." Anita holds her hand up, effectively silencing him. It takes him back to being seven years old and having to explain why his dad's truck had an enormous dent in it. She rests her hands on her hips, pacing back and forth as she purses her lips. Eventually she sits in the leather armchair situated in the corner. "Eddie, you and I have known each other a long time. A long time. I've been your agent since you walked into my shitty office back in Dallas. Given your impressive display of awards, I'd say we've done pretty well together."
She inhales sharply, rubbing at her temple. Anita doesn't mince words, it's part of why he's always liked her. He never has to question where he stands. She says 'jump' and he knows exactly how high. It's not difficult to guess what's coming next.
"Eddie, I know you're going through a rough patch. What you're dealing with is hard enough without seeing it splashed on every tabloid and trashy website. Not to mention none of those places knows the real story, so it's all a bunch of 'she said he might have said' bullshit. But you've made it through tougher things." Anita doesn't need to clarify that she's talking about Shannon's death and how his parents tried to take Christopher. "I don't know what's happening this time, but I need to take a step back. My wife has made it very clear that all of my attempts at stress management are not working and that if I can't get it under control I shouldn't be surprised when I come home to an empty house. So."
Eddie swallows, waiting for the inevitable and cursing himself for pretending he wouldn't care.
"I've talked to a few friends in the business and found someone willing to take you on."
What?
"What? You're not firing me?"
Anita's features soften. "Technically, yes. I am very much dropping you like a scorpion I found in my boots. However, like I said, I found someone willing to work with you. The name is Bobby Nash. He runs a smallish agency but don't let that throw you. He's cobbled together some pretty impressive talent. I assume you've heard of Evan Buckley?"
Eddie scoffs. "Of course I have. Who hasn't? Christ, he's everywhere you look. I can't pass a damn bus stop without seeing his face." A few details begin to click into place within Eddie's muddled brain. "Bobby Nash is his agent?"
"Sure is. And we all know the stories about Evan's past aren't the type you trot out at parties. My advice is that you don't look a gift horse in the mouth, go with Nash and do whatever he tells you to do. He even has a role in mind for you, costarring with Buckley. What do you say?"
What else was there to say? If Eddie didn't want to get blacklisted or wind up as some washed up tragic Hollywood story, being gossiped about where everyone - including his son - could see what a failure he was...
"I guess I say- when can I meet him?"
"Good answer." Anita clasps her hands together and gives him her signature smirk that tells him she approves. "Just leave everything to me."
Up to this point, Eddie has trusted Anita implicitly with all the messy business that comes with having him for a client. Why stop now?
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@thewolvesof1998 @watchyourbuck @welcometololaland @wildlife4life and anyone else who wants to 😘
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bl00d-bunny · 2 years
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wakeup call - lip gallagher
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-pairing- lip gallagher x fem!reader
-summary- after you're late for a shift at patsy's pies, lip swings by your apartment to check on you
-warnings- smut minors dni!!, smoking (w33d), shameless activities lol, general smuttiness, unprotected p in v (be smart, wrap it!),
-word count- 2k
-additional notes- not proofread or edited,
18+ minors do not interact!
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the southside wasn’t the best place to live and you knew that, between the near-constant construction and the fights on the streets it was a miracle that you ever got a lay in. you hadn’t been able to sleep until at least 3 am since your neighbours decided to blast crappy songs in an attempt to hide the fact they were fucking all night long (it didn’t work, obviously). And it sounded like they just started up again, great.
you sigh as you glance at the clock, 9.34 am, there goes your lie-in. you roll over and pull a pillow over your head, but the pounding against the wall only gets louder. eventually, you decide you can’t take it anymore, full of rage and lack of sleep, you throw yourself out of your warm bed, tugging your robe on tight. as you make your way to the front door you realise the banging was not your neighbours going for round 5, it was someone knocking on your door, aggressively.
you grab the wooden baseball bat you keep by the front door just in case and make your way to the door. on your tip toes, bat raised, you squint to look through the peephole. you roll your eyes and lower the bat. what was lip gallagher doing pounding on your door on a sunday morning?
“what do you want?” you swing the door open.
juxtapose to his knocking, he didn’t seem angry.
“fi sent me, you didn’t show up for your shift,” he said plainly.
fiona really helped you out when you were in a bad place, she gave you a job at patsy’s and let you rent one of her apartments. she got you off the streets and gave you stability and for that, you were forever grateful but you knew you didn’t have a shift today, you never had a shift on a sunday, and in the rare case you worked a sunday shift you wouldn’t start til 11. you told lip that much.
“it’s saturday and…” he pulled out his phone to check the time, “it’s quarter past 12,”
“what? no, my clock said…” you trailed off rushing back to your bedroom
9.34 am still flashed on your alarm clock, the power must have gone out. you grabbed your phone from where it was charging but it didn’t turn on. it died last night on your shift, but you plugged it in. and it was still plugged in you pushed the cord and your phone lit up letting you know it was finally charging.
“fuck!” you flopped back onto your bed, dragging your hands down your face.
“i’ll call fiona,” you jumped not realising he had followed you, standing in the doorway of your bedroom.
“thank you, i’ll literally be 5 minutes,” you pushed past him making your way to the bathroom.
you brushed your teeth in record time, turning the faucet off you overheard him on the phone.
“…she can’t stop throwing up, fi. there’s no way she can come in.”
you poked your head out of the bathroom “what the fuck are you doing?!?” you mouthed to him.
“relax, trust me” he turned his attention back to his phone, “i think i’m gonna stay here a little while and make sure she’s okay,”
you looked at him with wide eyes, what was he doing? you were practically ready for work and he just told fiona you’re not going in.
“what was that all about?” you started as soon as his phone was back in his pocket.
“well now neither of us has to go to work” he shrugged with a smug smile.
“and what if fiona decides to come to check up on us?” you questioned. when you are actually sick, sometimes fiona will stop by and check on you, maybe bring you some soup and a box of tissues. what if she came to check up on you and saw you were fine and lip was nowhere to be seen?
“guess we will have to hang out here, ya know just in case,” he settled himself on the sofa.
“whatever, i’m gonna try and get some sleep,” lack of sleep finally caught up to you as you shuffled to your bed that had long lost its warmth.
after what felt like an eternity you gave up on going back to sleep. tired of tossing and turning you moved to the living room. plopping yourself on the opposite side of the couch from where lip was scrolling on his phone, as whatever daytime show played on your tv. you reached under your coffee table, pulled out your rolling tray, and began rolling a joint. you saw lip watching you out of the corner of your eye but chose to ignore him until you brought the joint to your lips. you locked eyes with him as you slowly slide your tongue out to lick the gum strip before rolling the joint closed. you only broke eye contact to find a lighter, which of course you couldn’t find. lip shifted his body weight as he pulled a lighter out of his pocket, he moved closer to you and sparked it. you leaned in, joint held between your lips, looking down as the end glowed red in the orange flame.
you brought your fingers up to remove the blunt from your lips, closing your eyes and leaning back as you inhale, feeling the warmth of the weed spread throughout your whole body, instantly relaxing you. exhaling, you sit up again taking another puff before holding the spliff towards lip, instead of taking it he pulled you closer to him with your outstretched arm. you’re confused until you finally exhale your last puff and he inhales it keeping his eyes on yours. you bring the joint to your lips once more, inhaling deeper this time, moving your lips inches away from his as you exhaled.
you watch as the milky smoke moves from your lips to his. your entire being is warm, maybe its the weed, maybe its lips hands resting on your legs, or simply the close proximity, but you feel lightheaded. finally breaking eye contact with him you place the joint in the ashtray- but don’t you move from your cross-legged position and he doesn’t move his hands from your legs.
you watched his eyes fall from yours to your lips and back again. you knew what was coming next, it was only a matter of time. you and lip have had this predicament going on for a while now. you’d flirt with each other, tease each other, until the tension hung in the air like smoke, and just when one of you was about to make a move, there was always an interruption. sometimes it was a phone call, or someone walking in, no matter what it was the interruption was always there. maybe it was a sign that you shouldn’t, but neither of you cared enough to pay it any mind.
but here, in your apartment, alone, together, with nowhere to be, there was no interruption this time. he knew that you knew that, still neither made the move to close the gap. maybe a little more weed would help speed things along, you reached towards the half-smoked joint still in the ashtray, but he stopped you, his hand on your jaw, forcing you to look at him. before you could say anything, do anything, his lips were on yours, hungry as if he was starved and only you could satisfy his hunger.
his hands on your face pulling you impossibly close, you pulled yourself to be on his lap, your arms around his neck fingers tangling in his hair. no distractions, no interruptions, just you two on the couch smoke hanging in clouds around, keeping the world out.
you feel him grow hard beneath you, grinding against him, searching for friction in any form, he growled in your mouth so you continued.
he pinned you between himself and your worn-down couch, his tongue moving against your own. you bucked your hips, still chasing any kind of touch or friction. his large hands came to pin your hips against the tattered couch, you whined missing the movement.
“be patient,” he kissed your jaw. you turned your head to allow him more access as he left sloppy kisses down your neck, nipping here and there. you bit down on your lip to not give him the satisfaction.
he soon found out how worked up he’d got you when he shoved his hand down your pants. his slender fingers teasing your clit with large, slow circles. you reach between you to start unbuttoning his pants but he uses his opposite hand to pin your wrists above your head.
“really?” you huff out
“i told you to be patient,” he smirked applying pressure to your clit that caused you to squirm beneath him, his teeth at your neck.
eventually, he removed his hand from your wrists in favour of your boobs, pulling your neckline down to expose your chest. one hand pinching at your nipple, the other keeping up the slow circles on your clit, as if he couldn’t be doing anymore he brought his lips to your free nipple, sucking and nipping leaving you a mess. the room was spinning, your head clouded, heart beating wildly underneath your ribcage.
he removed himself from you, much to your displeasure. with his legs on either side of you, he unbuttoned your pants, pulling them and your underwear down in one swift motion, leaving you breathless. with him above you now you could see his cock struggling against his jeans, almost instinctively you reach up to unbutton them. he stands up to remove them further as you kick yours from around your ankles.
he kneels over you once more, one hand next to your head the other pumping his cock between you. you look down to watch, subconsciously biting your lip. he readies himself between your legs, and you wrap your arms around his neck. in one agonisingly slow thrust he bottomed out. you squeezed your eyes shut mentally adjusting your self.
he places a hand on your hip as he pulls out almost completely, he looks down where the two of you connect. you can’t help but buck your hips desperate to feel him inside of you again. he brings both his hands to you hips to press you into the couch, all you can do is whine, showing him just how desperate you are.
before you knew it his hips snapped against yours in a ruthless thrust causing your eyes to roll into the back of your head, a mix of a moan and a scream climb from your throat.
his lips against your ear now “ i warned you to be paitent,” his voice darker than before
“guess i’ll just have to teach. you. a lesson.” each word punctuated with a thrust deeper than the last. you felt yourself coming undone, he knew it too, between the moans you let out and your nails in his back, lip knew exactly what he was doing to you.
he released you hips from his grasp but didn’t let up on the speed, he brought his thumb to your clit drawing slow steady circles, a mind-numbing contrast to his thrusts now growing sloppy.
his breath hot across your face, he was close, you were too, it was a matter of time before one of you came tipping the other over the edge. he picked up the circles on your clit hoping to make you come first, you attacked his neck with your tongue, trying not to give him the satisfaction. but it was to little to late, he had you a mess beneath him, you wrapped a leg around his hip, allowing him to hit just the right spot.
in a matter of seconds, you came, closing your eyes you allowed yourself to be swallowed by the sensations, lip following closely behind, collapsing on top of you.
eyes still closed, trying to catch your breath, you feel lip get up and move to the other side of the couch, then you hear the lighter click and his steady inhale. without opening your eyes you stick you hand out in his direction awaiting the joint, instead you only hear him inhale again. you sit up giving him a death glare.
“did that lesson really teach you nothing?” he smirks before blowing the smoke in your direction.
you stand up, taking the joint from him before sitting on his lap, taking a long inhale.
“i guess i’ll be needing more lessons then”
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jo-harrington · 10 months
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Standard Operating Procedures 1.04 (Eddie Munson x Store Manager!Reader)
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Pairing: Eddie Munson x Fem!Reader
Summary: The summer is ending, school is about to start, the seasons are changing...and so are things between you and Eddie.
Previous Part: Corrective Action
Warnings/Themes: AU where the Upside Down doesn't terrorize Hawkins. Reader works at the Claire's at StarCourt. Eddie works at TapeWorld. Mutual Pining and Slow Burn, Fluff, Food/Eating, Talks about the Future, Romantic Tension/Sexual Tension
You can find my masterlist here for more featuring our resident Store Manager and all of my other writing.
Please do not interact if you are not 18+.
Enjoy!
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Eddie had always had a sweet tooth.
His mom swore, up and down, that her only craving had been for Zebra Cakes when she was pregnant with him.
His favorite food as a baby had been mashed peaches.
And now he was sure his body was chemically composed of more Dr. Pepper than water.
So it should have been no big surprise that he was so attracted to you.
Ahem.
So it should have been no big surprise that he would have planned a snack cake taste test extravaganza for your usual Sunday Not-a-Date Date.
You'd revealed early on that your grandparents were both "in the sugar business."
"My grandpa," you told him once as you walked through the mall window shopping on your lunch. "Worked the chocolate chip line at the Maurice Lenell bakery."
"Are those the fancy cookie tins--"
"That they sell at Christmas? Yes."
"Wayne always gets one with his holiday bonus," Eddie reminisced. "The pinwheel ones with the red sugar on the outside are my favorite."
"And my grandma worked at the Hostess factory," you continued. "She always always brought home boxes of rejects. I probably would have been too shy to make friends at school if they hadn't flocked to me for baked goods."
Because of this though, you had never fraternized with the enemy, as Eddie so dramatically put it: Little Debbie.
"And now," his gaze turned dark and mischievous as he threw open the doors to the van. "You shall feel the full power of the dark side."
He outdid himself, truly.
Piles of snack cakes from the gas station, sorted into two neat little stacks, a little notebook for scorekeeping, and a 6-pack of Mountain Dew as a palette cleanser.
“You keep saying,” he said as you settled in amongst the pillows and blankets he’d set up in the back so you’d both have a cozy spot to snack. The radio was softly playing in the background. It was nice. “That you wanted to drink the water in the mall fountains. Did you know that Mountain Dew is the closest you’re gonna get?”
You’d both run garbage late one Wednesday night and thrown coins into the fountain on your way back to your stores. And that’s when you’d revealed your deepest darkest secret.
“Because they’ll both probably kill me in the end?” You joked.
“No, because Bromine is in both.”
“Ok nerd.” You snorted.
“Not…a nerd,” he shoved you as he plopped down beside you. “But I did this project for chemistry class last year. On Mountain Dew. And how it gets that color. And it’s also how they keep the fountain water clean. Or pool water? I can’t remember exactly right now.”
“Ok nerd.”
“I’m sorry,” he clutched his hand over his heart. “My lady wanted to taste only the finest of fountain water. And I deliver her the closest thing and am openly mocked? Twice?”
You stuck your tongue out at him and slapped his shoulder, then asked what the rubric was for the taste test.
And then you snacked til you made yourselves sick and did what you always did, balanced conversation and companionable silence.
That was a new thing. The silence.
Not for the two of you, but for Eddie.
He wasn't used to silence, he was used to loud music, noises and raucous laughter and adventure--real or fantasy--with his friends, but since the two of you started hanging out, he was getting used to the silence a little more. Enjoying it. Savoring it. Looking forward to it.
The anticipation of waiting for something wonderful--thoughts or observations or confessions--coming of your mouth made him feel warm inside.
Eddie had pondered your friendship earlier in the day as you'd run in to let him know you couldn't take lunch together.
"There's this crazy long piercing line and I'm just running to get a slice of pizza and then going back up. I'm so sorry, I'll see you after work ok?"
Your energy was frantic and your words faster than lightspeed, but your eyes were filled with concern and care for him. The little hitch of your eyebrows and the extra pause you took so you made sure that he understood that you weren't ditching him you just...couldn't do lunch and didn't want to leave him hanging.
Even when everything was falling apart around you, you cared to make sure he understood.
It was nice.
And it wasn't just you. But it was nicer when it was you.
He didn't get a lot of understanding like that. Especially not in Hawkins where his last name and his appearance caused everyone's hackles to raise a little. And even the people who did want him around...well it was hit or miss if they decided to stick around.
But since working at StarCourt, things had been different. He had a boss and coworkers who liked him, inside jokes with people who worked at other stores. He had you. He wasn't Eddie The Freak Munson. He was Eddie from TapeWorld. And Eddie from TapeWorld seemed to help people warm up to Eddie Munson.
What a weird concept. People wanting him around. Coming to StarCourt and being around people who accepted him and valued him...understood him. He'd only felt that way with Hellfire...and with Corroded Coffin.
People were good and people liked him. A sweeter treat than all the Hostess in the world.
It had been a few months now; a few months of an actual job, a consistent crush friend, and everything seeming to look up for him. Give or take a few minor hiccups but...he was feeling good.
And school was starting soon, maybe this would be the year the tide turned? No more waiting for the future to finally happen for him; he was making things happen for himself.
It might finally be his year...
"So," he leaned over, into your personal space, and fished a folded piece of paper from his back pocket. "Kyle gave me this thing yesterday."
"Oh yeah?" Your eyebrows raised in curiosity as you happily munched on a sugary treat.
He'd spiraled a little bit when he'd been handed the sheet. Three little words at the top.
Schedule Change Request.
Way back at the beginning of summer, after the initial shock that he'd gotten the job at TapeWorld, he figured he was just counting his days until he was fired and that the start of the school year would have been the final nail in the coffin if he made it that far.
Instead Kyle was...asking him to stay.
"I’m probably not gonna be able to give you as many hours with school,” he sighed. “Which is a real bummer. But I’ll put you on as much as I can."
"You're not kicking me out?" Eddie asked, shocked.
"What? Are you nuts? Ed, you're like...my best guy! I need you here. Selling those guitars, getting those sales bonuses. And because you're my buddy. So make sure you put your for-sure days off on there...you know I'm gonna forget.”
He explained it all to you, which led to you cackling loudly.
"Oh my God," you laughed. "Eddie!"
"What? I know it's silly."
"No, I'm not laughing because of that," you began. "My first position at Claire's had been a summer job too and I seriously thought that I was gonna get fired once school was back in session."
"Seriously?"
"Yeah. And it's a real thing because no one tells you that you're done when summer's over. You're gonna see come Christmas, Kyle will have to hire seasonal associates--and hey, ok...seriously if Gareth or Dave come asking for a job...it might seem fun...but don't--and he'll have to make sure they have end dates on their paperwork otherwise it's a whole thing."
You went on and on about helping your old manager with paperwork and you'd forgotten to put an end date as you were filling everything out. And then someone's mom came to complain at the end of the season when their kid was let go.
"And she kept screaming and screaming. And that's why I have a strict parent policy at work. Even though I'm the reason that got so fucked up; trial by fire. Jen was pissed."
Eddie reached out and unwrapped your hand from the Sno-Ball that you had crushed as you told the story. He adored it when you got so animated, but the poor little pastry was now just a mess of crumbs and frosting and marshmallow goo on your fingers and now his as he plucked the half-destroyed treat from your grasp.
And the thing was...
The thing was, Eddie wasn't...he was decidedly not smooth. He was gross. He was a gross boy. He hacked loogies and did spit handshakes with the guys all the time. He had no five second rule when it came to food dropped on the floor; it was an optical inspection and then usually straight down the gullet.
He could be romantic and seductive if he wanted to be; he could charm the...ahem...pants off some people if the need arose. And he had.
But that wasn't this.
This was a caught up in the moment of having a good time with his friend and doing what he would have done if one of his buddies crushed a snack cake. He'd be his usual gross self and expect them to groan and screech and laugh at him. Boys will be boys and all.
This was a too little too late moment of realization as he, Eddie Munson, lacking the foresight of having napkins in the van for this little snack cake taste test since he usually wiped his honey-bun-icing slick hands on his jeans after he unhinged his jaw and shoved it in on mornings when he was running late, saw no other way to clean sweet frosting off your hand except to lick it off your thumb.
The van suddenly got smaller and hotter as his tongue traveled up the pad of your finger, over the ridge of each joint and to the center of your palm. His eyes traveled up to meet yours as he flicked the sweetness off of you, and his breath hitched when he saw the way your eyes widened.
How was he supposed to deal with this? How was he supposed to handle this epic potential fuck up right here? How was he supposed to stop his brain--and maybe some other parts of him--from wanting to take the hand that gently held your wrist and pull you closer so he could kiss the sugar from your lips and not just...
Lick it off your hand.
Jesus, he was an idiot.
Caught between a rock and a hard dick.
Hard place. Fuck.
But that was the conundrum right? Because Eddie did want to kiss you; he enjoyed kissing...a lot actually, and it would be...nice if all of these dates were actual dates so that he could just kiss you and squeeze you and all of the nice things that came with...having someone who liked you back. So he didn't have to shoot Kyle a dirty look every time he teased "have a nice lunch with your girlfriend" knowing fully well that it was exactly what Eddie wanted.
He'd heard the spiel many times when Kyle had come back from his own lunch and then stood over Eddie as the younger man unpacked shipments, and told him, flat out, hands on his hips "you just need to ask her out man I'm getting sick of this."
And the guys had teased him a bunch.
And Wayne kept asking when you were coming around again.
Well this could be it.
A horrible start to asking a girl out on a date but wouldn't that be a funny story, and Eddie really did like a funny story.
This is. This is the moment.
Eddie opened his mouth to say something and so did you. You both backed down from actually saying anything. Eddie's hand tightened on your wrist and he was sure he could feel your heart beating faster. And was that you leaning a little closer to him? And did your eyes look at his mouth as he licked over the seam of his lips really quickly for courage.
He opened his mouth again...
Courage. He could do it. This was gonna be his year, and you were gonna be his girl.
...and then slammed the broken remains of the SnoBall in.
Quite literally slammed, shoved, fingers flailing as he tried to smoosh the chocolate cake and pink-coated marshmallow and remnants of frosting inside.
He let go of your wrist and then backed away from you as far as he could.
Idiot.
You let out a nervous laugh and looked down at your messy hand. You tried to use a discarded wrapper to clean yourself up when Eddie just...pulled off the flannel that he'd layered on to help wipe you off instead.
Like he probably should have done in the first place.
You didn't say anything, just smiled gently at him, like you always did. Always patient. Always forgiving of his mistakes.
What had you even been talking about before?
Oh...right.
"Note to self," he muttered around the SnoBall. "Never becoming a manager."
Your eyes crinkled a little as your smile got bigger and you grabbed onto the front of his shirt and shook him a little.
"Save yourself!"
The rest of your evening went by unremarkably.
You both got too hyped up on sweets and Mountain Dew, ran a few circles around the van in the StarCourt parking lot, headbanging and screaming, after Eddie threw on a tape he said the two of you could dance to. Then to Dairy Queen where you soaked up all the sugar with chili cheese dogs.
An otherwise normal Sunday for the two of you.
Mishap forgotten.
Nerves forgotten.
Misplaced feelings...forgotten.
For now.
---
Next Part: Standard Operating Procedures 1.05
220 notes · View notes
mqverick · 7 months
Text
scummy man || ✮⋆˙ .
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“Cause he’s a scumbag, don’t you know?
I said he’s a scumbag, don’t you know?”
────────── ★ ───────────
The moment Daniel Kaffee walked into your office with his stupid apple and his stupid, childish ‘hi’, you knew you were fucked from top to bottom. Of course, they hadn’t taken you seriously when you petitioned Division to have counsel assigned. They brought you the first idiot they came across.
You’d written a seventeen page memo to Bronsky outlining the situation, you’d pleaded your case for a half hour in his living room on a Sunday afternoon, and Division assigned a Lt. Junior Grade? They had too be kidding (or hate you).
You’d managed to scare him, at least, and that you were proud of. He seemed like the type, who was particularly full of himself, which was proven as quite the right accusation, after a few minutes of speaking with him. He was just a bunch of royal bullshit, you’d decided — fucking wanted him off the case, even though he hadn’t even started yet.
He was never going to take it seriously, judging on how loose and cool he acted. For crying out loud, Dawson and Downey were at his sake, while Daniel could not care less about them, opting to practice baseball instead, because he claimed he had a critical game coming. Was that guy serious?
“Lieutenant, would you feel very insulted if I recommended to your supervisor that he assign different counsel?” you threatened, face burning as you struggled to contain your anger at his complete indifference to the situation.
“Why would you do that?”
He had the nerve to ask. “You’re not fit to handle the defense. One second more with you and the marines will have sealed their poor fate.”
Daniel nodded, unimpressed with your tone.
“You don’t even know me. Ordinarily, it takes someone hours to discover I’m not fit to handle a defense. You’ve known me for less than ten minutes.” He walked away from you, as if your threat was a joke to him, like he didn’t believe you.
You stupidly stared at him, blood boiling as you wondered how impossibly scummy one could be.
“I do know you. Daniel Allistair Kaffee, born June 8th, 1964 at Boston Mercy Hospital. Your father's Lionel Kaffee, former Navy Judge Advocate and Attorney General, of the United States, died 1985. You went to Harvard Law on a Navy scholarship, probably because that’s what your father wanted you to do, and now you’re just treading water for the three years you’ve gotta serve in the JAG Corps, just kinda laying low til you can get out and get a real job. And if that’s the situation, that’s fine, I won’t tell anyone. But my feeling is that if this case is handled in the same fast-food, slick-ass, Persian Bazaar manner with which you seem to handle everything else, something’s gonna get missed. And I’d be damned if I allowed Dawson and Downey to spend any more time in prison than absolutely necessary, because their attorney had pre-determined the path of least resistance,” your monologue prevented you from taking a breath, confidently crossing your arms like you’d just won an argument, as Daniel took a quick sip from his Yoo-Hoo, staring intently at you. The sun was hitting his face and if you allowed it to yourself, you could’ve observed how stunningly green his eyes were.
“Wow,” he admired, very taken aback. “I’m sexually aroused, Commander. I may be picking the wrong time to ask you this, but are you seeing anyone right now? ‘Cause I think you and I would be perfect together. It’s clear that you respect me and that’s the foundation for any solid—”
“Shut up.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
You let out an angry exhale and grabbed him by the collar of his thin baseball shirt, pulling him towards you. He gasped in surprise, breath caught in his throat as you stabbed your finger into his chest as a warning.
“Listen there, Kaffee, I will have you removed from the case, so don’t go around being cute and unbothered. Mark my words, you just waisted your last chance with me.”
And with that, you threw him back to the bleachers, storming away in annoyance and over the top frustration. Never had another human being ever crawled up under your nerves so quickly, it had to be an astonishing world record.
When you walked into your office the next day just to find Daniel sitting on your chair already, you neared the dreadful experience of going into cardiac arrest. You silently wondered how he’d managed to sneak in, but decided to ignore him.
“You didn’t do it.”
His words were softly spoken, causing you to look at him, undoubtedly baffled. “I beg your pardon?”
“You didn’t do it,” he repeated with more emphasis, as if that would help you understand what he was referring to. “I thought you really wanted me out of the case, so I went to check, see if you talked to my supervisor. You didn’t.”
Oh, so he was talking about that. You played it off as something frankly unimportant, not even bothering to reply anything to him. If you turned your back around just for one second, you could’ve seen exactly how distressed he was.
Daniel got up from your chair, walking up behind you as he towered over you, hands unexpectedly nervous, seeing as they couldn’t stay still for a full minute on the waistline of his uniform trousers. You chuckled silently to yourself, nose scrunching in pride as you turned your back, looking dead into his eyes, your own ones fixed on the way his Adam’s apple moved in his neck as he gulped.
“Good job, Lieutenant. I see you took my words seriously for once. Need to keep into mind that you shit your pants way too easily, threats have you following every order you’ve been given.”
Daniel’s eyes were blown with disbelief of your manners, brows raised in offense. There was no doubt that you were prepared to make his life a living hell, had every intention to cause this case to be his first and last one, because the way it was going, he’d either rip apart his diploma or plain out kill himself. And who had the delightful opportunity to hear Daniel complain day and night? None other than Sam.
“She hates me, I don’t even know why,” he cried while pacing back and forth in his small living room, bat placed over his shoulders as he rested his hands on it, mind far away from the case. Sam sighed, sinking back into the couch. “She barely even knows me! I always do stuff wrong for her, she’s never satisfied. Little miss perfect,” he continued without a break, swinging the bat now as he ignored the board that stood in the middle of the place. Sam felt nauseous, having baring his unstoppable yapping for what felt like decades, even though it’d only been less than ten minutes.
A knock on the door pulled him out of his unlimited boredom and he got up to see who it was, ignoring the way Daniel kept going on and on. He looked over the eye on the door, almost letting out an audible groan at the fact that it was you who had knocked, meaning that your appearance would drive his friend even crazier.
“Come in,” he whispered lowly to you as he unlocked the door and let you in. You shrugged your jacket off your shoulders, noticing that Daniel hadn’t even acknowledged the fact that someone else had gotten into his house. “Damn, I’ve never seen him like this before. Normally he loses interest in a girl after a date or two…” he commented with a smirk, but you ignored him.
“You know, I wish she could’ve taken me out of the case, so that I wouldn’t have to see her face again,” Daniel admitted frustratedly, stopping dead in his tracks momentarily as he laid his eyes on you. Suddenly, hitting his head as hard as possible with his bat didn’t seem like such a terrible idea. Oh, he was fucked to the core.
A smug, proud smile spread across your lips.
“Talking about me, Lieutenant Kaffee?” you rhetorically asked, crossing your arms and puffing your chest out arrogantly as you strode confidently across the room to get to him.
Daniel pretended to turn a deaf ear to your question, head strictly observing the case’s board as he gripped on the hand of his baseball bat. He wished the earth would open up and swallow him out of existence, his brain bleeding at the pure satisfaction he’d so universally given you by admitting the very phrase that you’d been accusing him of; dropping the case, because he couldn’t take the seriousness of it. And oh, well, because he couldn’t bare another second with you breathing down his neck and constantly criticizing him without even caring enough to get to know him — not as Daniel Kaffee, but Marine Lieutenant Kaffee. You had no idea of his potential, yet you still found it in you to look down at him, underestimate and humiliate him.
Sam incredulously just existed there, not taking any stance against either one of you. He’d been friends with Daniel since ages, which cast him to be very close to his way of thinking, and he knew for an undeniable fact that his friend was building up a brick wall of denial, hatred and irony just because he wouldn’t want to face the reality of the situation that pained his mind.
Daniel was captivated by you, Sam claimed.
He silently watched the way his eyes never left your face the entire time you spent in the small apartment, while working on the case, the split second that Daniel subconsciously let his jaw slightly hang open when you determinedly explained every detail of how to teach the marines how to act in the courtroom. Of course, Daniel was going through a matter of confusion.
You stood an obstacle to his limitless confidence and that wasn’t something he particularly wanted to experience every passing day, thus why he’d convinced himself that he hated you. But that was simply not true, at least according to Sam’s observations, which always proved to be right.
“I hate her,” he’d say all the time, but even the sound of his voice gave away the fact that he didn’t. How could he, anyway? Despite the hard time you were giving him, you actually worked by his side, boosting him even more. Come on — he was going to be in a courtroom — he’d never been in one before. All because of how stubborn you were with this case. Daniel loved it.
“Nobody likes her very much,” he’d said in Cuba, shouting his statement loudly enough for all the people in the convertible to hear despite the dizzying noise of shots and fighter planes. You’d rolled your eyes, opting not to give him the chance to stupidly smirk at himself for managing to piss you off (that was exactly his only goal).
───
Predictably enough, Daniel was laying down on his couch as a baseball game faintly played in the background, preventing him from concentrating. Truth be told, his mind was blank. He’d prepared himself mentally for what was coming; they’d lose the trial, make complete fools of themselves in front of an entire courtroom. His father was shaking his head disappointedly at him, Daniel knew it. He fiddled with his bat, glancing at the remnants of the two days old pizza he’d heated up in the microwave fifteen minutes ago, lazily thrown in a piece of kitchen paper, next to a half empty bottle of Yoo-hoo. His white uniform from earlier was thrown in a pile in a corner, like a piece of garbage he was itching to get out of his house.
A sudden buzz from his bell was heard, throwing him off as he jumped a little, eyebrows furrowing in confusion as he went to the door, wondering who it could be at that time, since he wasn’t even expecting anyone. Or so he thought. The moment he opened the door, you stormed inside without even waiting for him to invite you in. Daniel stood speechless for one second, then shrugged it off, simply because it was you, and your ignorance of him was unquestionable. He looked shit, he realised; dressed in a dark gray T-shirt that had small oil stains on it because of the pizza, an abstract, unbuttoned red, brown and green colored shirt thrown over it.
“I’ve really missed you. It’s been almost three hours since I last saw—” he began sarcastically, but you cut him off abruptly, while placing a stack of papers onto the living room table.
“I can already tell that you forgot we had to meet up to discuss about the case by the way you’ve shamelessly displayed your gross dinner all over the files we need to present tomorrow. Good job, like always, Kaffee.”
Daniel didn’t bother to huff or give out any reaction, at that point, he knew that you were aware of the fact that you pushed his buttons just by breathing the same direction as him. He let his bat against the arm of the couch, taking a folder into his hands and pretending to examine it.
“Is Sam not coming?” he asked without raising his eyes to look at you.
“I don’t know, he’s your buddy. Aren’t you supposed to know better than me?”
You judged his choice of childish drink with a long, disgusting glare, then buried your face into the papers as well. Dawson and Downey relied upon the three of you deeply and if proving them not guilty meant you had to spend your Friday evening in Daniel Kaffee’s apartment, then so be it. It was a lot quieter than usual and the unfamiliar emptiness had you wondering. The baseball game was still on, distracting you from thinking clearly. “I think Kendrick ordered the Code Red. So do you,” you mumbled out of the blue, catching his attention in a second.
“You didn’t just come here to bother me?”
“You’re the worst lawyer I’ve ever met,” you spoke rudely, noticing Daniel’s face drop. “Why don’t you get the poor guys a new attorney, huh? You stand no chance anyway, you’re too afraid.”
“You still haven’t taken the time to get to know me, so I don’t think that you have any rights to go around telling me what to do, Commander,” the boldness of his tone matched yours as he sat on the couch, still denying the urge to look up at you, gauge your reaction to his words. He liked to ignore you, it gave him the impression that he had some sort of power over you that drove you as far mad as you did to him. Ignorance was kind.
“Think I’m going to change my mind about you the moment I hear your childhood sob story? They can all say you’re the best damn lawyer it’s ever been their pleasure to have as an attorney, and I still wouldn’t be convinced. But go on, though, I’ll humor you for tonight. Were daddy’s expectations really that high that they scare you off to do your job correctly?”
He pursed his lips, a slight furrow between his brows again as he stared pointedly at you. His heart crashed every time you went down the family path, not fully understanding how you’d figured him out so quickly and with less effort than even Jack put into his conversations with him. “Okay, then, if you really believe all that, get me replaced, I won’t stop you. Or did you already try that with no luck? Please, spare me the psycho-babble father bullshit, though, it’s your only argument and it’s getting tiring.”
“At least I have an argument.”
“Fucking congratulations! That’s just splendid!”
“Another lawyer won’t be good enough!” you accidentally admitted on your temper. Your eyes widened at the echo in the dead silence, that grew in the apartment, after what you’d just blurted out. Daniel’s eyes softened, filled with pure bewilderment, jaw going slack. His upper front teeth were visible as he stared at you stupidly enough to have your cheeks burning the brightest shade of red. You tried to find an excuse to reason yourself, but nothing could cover up the royal bullocks you’d thrown all over yourself.
He’d never let you live that moment down.
“You frighten me. I’m involved in a situation now, in which the stakes couldn’t be higher. I’m not going to take time out to give tutorials in criminal procedure to an internal affairs schoolgirl who doesn’t know what the fuck she’s doing and still has the nerve to threaten my lead.”
“I just melt when you sugar-talk me, Danny.”Daniel felt a sudden rush of heat form in the back of his neck, traveling all the way up to his face at the sound of his nickname falling out of your lips. It wasn’t even a big deal — everyone called him Danny, yet the way it sounded in his ears when you uttered it out, it felt as though someone had turned up the dial on his internal embarrassment thermostat to maximum, and now he was sure he was ready to burst at any moment. The awkwardness of the moment had both of you completely mute, blankly finding random things in his house to interestingly stare at, as if they were suddenly very important. “Anyway, I think you know exactly how to win. They need you.”
A dumbstruck smile lightened up his face.
“You really think so?”
“Do you have something to drink?” you dodged the question, knowing that you’d revealed too much of your genuine feelings about him. Of course you admired him, how could you not?
“Yeah — Yeah! Something to drink, yes, just a second, let me see what’s in the fridge,” he exclaimed, inexplicably jumpy as he practically flew to the fridge. The corners of your lips turned upwards, enjoying the way he struggled to roam through the drinks and food, some things falling over in his attempt to search in the back. When he finally approached you, he was proudly holding a small bottle with a yellow Yoo-hoo tag on it.
You sighed. “You’re ridiculous.”
“It’s chocolate milk, you’ll love it.”
What the hell, you thought, taking the drink from him as he handed it over to you with a warm smile. Your face was filled with disgust, almost hollering at the smell. When you let a few drops touch your lips, you coughed dramatically and shook your head in denial of what you’d just drank, placing the bottle back on the table.
“That’s the most foul thing I’ve ever tasted.”
“Wait until you try my cooking. I usually save that card until the fourth or fifth date, though,” Daniel smirked, eyes gleaming under the bright yellow light of his living room. He looks so dumb, how is this man a navy lawyer? you questioned yourself.
“Explains why you’re single, then.”
“Maybe I’m just waiting for someone.”
“Is it Jack Ross? ‘Cause I think he likes you back, you should totally make a move,” you teased him.
“Maybe said someone is annoying me as we talk.”
“Come on, Danny, can’t take a joke?”
He didn’t say anything, just rolled his eyes and twirled his bat on the ground, while pacing around the coffee table. “Can I ask you something personal?” he asked out of the blue, causing a pit of anxiety to form into your stomach.
“I suppose you’ll ask even if I refuse.”
“Look at you, you’re finally getting to know me.”
“Shoot, Kaffee.”
“What made you become a lawyer for the Navy?”
Your expression changed, now fully confused. You wondered how he’d possibly come up with that question all of sudden — was he doing some sort of research on you, get you exposed and out of his lead case so that you wouldn’t annoy him anymore with your constant complaining? Or was it more just Daniel being… well, Daniel and randomly coming up with the most out of context questions and things to discuss about?
“They wouldn’t let me fly the planes,” you simply gave and he tsk’ed with a dramatic head shake.
“Pegged you for the one that never gave up. You are becoming less of a role model on Junior Lieutenant Kaffee now, Commander. You’re like seven of the strangest women I’ve ever met.”
“That’s rich of you to say,” you added a little too quickly and loudly for your liking, hating how you were always so eager to defend yourself in situations that didn’t ask for it. “I’m the girl guys like you hated in sixth grade.”
Daniel’s eyes softened as he hesitantly took a seat next to you. “You’re wrong,” he muttered through his lips, looking down at his entwined fingers before exhaling exhaustively. “You’re the girl guys like me pulled the pigtails of at minor interactions just because they were too afraid of letting her know how they really felt about her.”
A pause. Silence built up in the room as Daniel kept looking down on his lap, eyes closed as if he was hoping for something, as if he was scared that the moment he’d open them, you’d be gone, because he’d screwed everything up again. But you were still there when he eventually decided to look over at you, staring blankly at him with no emotion whatsoever. He despised the fact that he couldn’t read you, hated the thought of not knowing exactly what went through your mind during that moment; it caused him too much anxiety, plus, with his little experience with girls, he’d never lived anything similar. They were all so chattery and urgent to fuck him that they didn’t hold anything back… and then, there was you.
You, who Daniel didn’t know how to feel about.
And suddenly, he couldn’t stand — bare — the fact that you’d been staring at him with so much to say, all that visible through your glassy eyes, and it was killing him, causing his stomach to flip, because he was ridiculously unaware about whether he did the right thing to reveal so much with that metaphor, or if he’d just ruined every aspect of professionalism between you.
“Kaffee?”
“Why are you looking at me like that?” he asked, his voice worn out, shaky as if he was about to break down right there in front of you. Your lack of response made his heart feel tight. “I’m not going to reassign Dawson and Downey to another lawyer, by the way. Neither will you ever be able to replace me, because I’m going to stick here.”
You instantly warmed up. For the first time, his confidence gave you that slight ounce of reassurance that you needed to get, put the colour back in your eyes as you grinned proudly at him, not caring about the so though Commander title you’d been given. “What made you change your mind?”
“Not you,” he replied, reciprocating the calmness and brightness of your face. “Just… don’t wear that perfume, it wrecks my concentration.”
“Really?” you asked in awe. Daniel just smiled. You noticed his Adam’s apple bob as he inhaled the courage to say something, then…
“This might be the wrong time to ask this, but would you really hate the idea of me taking y—”
“I am so sorry,” Sam interrupted, barging into Daniel’s apartment while panting, struggling to take his coat off as he put a hand over his chest. “I had to take care of my daughter, she got sick and my wife wasn’t home, I — Oh, I walked into something there, didn’t I?”
You think? Daniel mutely thought of saying to his friend, so mad inside as he glared at him with burning passion to slam the door shut into his face and returning to the conversation he was having with you less than twenty seconds ago.
“I need to go, anyway, I promised the Marines that I would visit them and help them prepare for the court. I’ll see you tomorrow, Danny. Bye, Sam,” you dismissed them, getting up from the couch and waving goodbye to the two of them as you walked outside with a small smile.
“No wait!” Daniel called, but it was already too late. “What the fuck, Sam?! You know something called knocking on the fucking door?”
Sam didn’t reply, simply because he was too busy explaining the story of why he thought he wouldn’t make it to the case preparation as he cleaned Daniel’s living room. He realised that his friend was paying no attention to him at all, only staring at the almost full Yoo-hoo bottle you’d left on the table from earlier, and that was all Sam needed to know exactly why he was being ignored. “You’re in love with her, aren’t you?”
Daniel never replied.
───
“Hi!” he greeted you with the following day, head peaking in your office through the half closed door. He looked dumb, his oversized blue varsity jacket covering most of his palms as he held onto the door with a wide grin, eyes sparkling. You couldn’t understand his excitement.
“Hey,” the reply was dry and held back.
“I think we might actually have just enough evidence to prove Dawson and Downey innocent, all thanks to you,” he claimed happily, allowing himself fully into your office. You gave him a weird look but didn’t question anything, instead ignored him as you organized the discarded papers on your desk into folders. Daniel’s face dropped at your lack of enthusiasm for him, worry written all over his face as he quickly began fiddling again.
“That’s quite literally my job, Daniel.”
“Did I do something to offend you?” His heart was racing now, mind stuck in the loop of any words that he could’ve said to cause your so indifferent reaction. “You’re giving me the cold shoulder. I thought we moved past that.”
“It was just one conversation about the case. It’s not like we’re expected to act like friends after not bickering for a total of five minutes.” Oh. Daniel’s stomach was tied into knots, he felt as though he’d been kicked in the crotch with the worst possible amount of strength. His face was paled, eyes growing blurry as he nodded at your statement, not finding himself strong enough to say anything back to you, and instead choosing to walk out with his last pieces of remaining dignity.
He thought you might had started liking him. Even a little, he didn’t care about the numbers.
Daniel got easily emotionally influenced, though, and his performance at the court was screwed. He wouldn’t communicate with either you or Sam, interrogating the men on the stand with such frustration that the jury sighed every five seconds. You pinched the bridge of your nose and tightened your fingers into fists, crumbling a paper in front of you as Sam touched your shoulder in a way of telling you to calm down.
But how could you? You were losing the case already and it hadn’t even been a day. What is he doing? you thought, relentlessly questioning his choice of tone and movements. You had no idea how you restrained yourself from slapping him against the wall when he returned to the desk, hands shoved into his pockets as he set his jaw.
“What do you think you’re doing?” you whispered yelled at him, but he didn’t even bother to look at you. When the judge dismissed everyone, Daniel walked away as if nothing had happened. Your head was going to explode, you decided, as you followed him, high heels slamming against the floor. You’d strangle the soul out of him, who would even defend you? Sam followed silently, keeping it low-key as he whispered at you not to create any more trouble. Daniel was seemingly upset and at the back of your mind, you wondered if the reason was the fact that you’d neglected him less than an hour ago back in your office. You felt like you should’ve kept that for yourself and tell him later eventually, when the trial would be over. “Do you have any idea why he’s like this?” you turned to the other attorney.
“Why do you think?” was the only thing he left you with, his words ringing in your head as your pace quickened unnecessarily faster than expected. Your breath was coming in short, eyes stinging as you repeatedly called for Daniel’s name in the corridors without any response.
He was proving you right by all this.
All your doubts and fears about him being unable to thoroughly handle the case were bursting one by one, getting huger and huger until you’d start breaking down in a corner on his behalf. You hated Daniel Kaffee more than any other person.
“Daniel, fucking stop!” you shouted and he finally stilled. Your immediate instinct was to take a break from the intense walking, hand over your chest as you tried to regain your balance.
“Maybe you should’ve asked for them to keep me out,” was all he said before disappearing outside. He was mad, but mostly exhausted with everything, especially overwhelmed by you. He was done trying; finished with the case, finished the way you treated him — how one day you loved him and the next day you pretended he wasn’t even there, as if he didn’t exist. And he was fine with that, you didn’t want him, he could live.
But you gave him false hope, or so he thought.
“Lieutenant!” he heard you yell again, your pants mixed with the sound of your heels against the hallway floor. He decided not to turn around, didn’t want to hear anything that you had to say. “Lieutenant Kaffee!” And suddenly, he stopped dead in his tracks, letting out a breath as he slammed his arms against his sides in defeat.
“What? What do you want from me?” he asked with frustration, voice raspy and shaky as he firmly loosened the black tie that felt like it was cutting the air out of his lungs, suit all messed up and wrinkly from fighting it off his body. He felt heavy, bothered, didn’t want to exist anymore.
“What do you mean what?” you asked with fragility, and it was the first time he’d ever heard you speak a sentence so softly and fearfully.
“I mean what is it?”
“I wanted to say that you did quite well in there, even though it was your first time and that—”
“Please — don’t even — don’t even start…” he cut you off mid-word, eyes squinting close as he tried not to look at you, afraid that just one glance at your face would be enough for him to bend.
“Why not?”
“Because you’re giving me mixed signals!” he abruptly bursted, making you jump a little. You’d never heard him raise his voice like that before, despite the fact that you’d been into countless bickers before with him. No, there was something different this time, something more into it.
“What?”
“You’re — you’re confusing the shit out of me! One day you fucking hate me and the other you get so nice with me that it almost makes me believe that maybe, just maybe, I could have a chance with you… Start things over. And then you go back to day one — and no one has ever… I feel like one day I’m saving you from a burning building and the next I’m throwing you to the sharks, this — this is exactly how it is with us and it’s all your fucking fault! I’ve tried so hard with you, to make myself worthy, to catch your attention, to make you realise that I don’t think I’ve never admired a person more than you in my life before… and you keep throwing everything away! And I’m fine with that, but for the name of love, stop giving me hope that one day maybe you’ll actually start liking me.”
His monologue left you speechless, every word, every breath engraved and buzzing into your troubled brain as he walked away, this time without being stopped by anyone. Daniel felt like rubbish. On one hand, he felt relieved for letting the thoughts that had been eating him alive out, but on the other he felt even heavier. He knew he’d risked so much for speaking up, but the final straw had been put into his overfilled glass.
For a short moment, he considered turning back.
Perhaps you’d have something to say to him, but that was exactly what he dreaded. The more he’d spend looking at you, waiting for an answer or even the slightest reaction, the more he’d want to listen to what you’d have to say to him, and that was cautionary for his condition. Obviously, he’d fallen for you along the line. You’d screwed him over so deeply that he didn’t know where to grasp at to save himself from losing the grip he had by the end of the cliff. No, he decided, if you wanted him half as bad as he wanted you, you’d go after him, search for him, ask people, show that you cared, even if the amount wasn’t a great deal.
It was insignificant to him, if you cared about him as much as he did for you, he just wanted you to care. Even as a companion, or a respected fellow attorney. You didn’t follow him, though, and the sad part was that he wasn’t even surprised. Of course you had nothing to say to him, you’d made that very clear by wanting him so badly off the case that you were prepared to move the sky and earth just to earn the satisfaction of watching him be defeated. And if you so utterly needed him uninvolved, why did you give him motivation not to quit? Why did you keep pushing him?
Every ounce of feeling that he had for you was a big, unanswered why that tortured him inside.
Daniel wished he could erase from your memory what he’d just confessed. Make you forget all about it, have you look at him with the same hateful eye that you always did. Because now, you’d look at him with pity, scared of what to say to him (he’d revealed way too much and he was only just realising it) — gosh, he’d ruined it. He was so exhausted, both mentally and physically.
Ethic violations were involved in the mess, as well, because of course they would be. A sexual relationship with a fellow counsel in the middle of a trial? What was he thinking? As if you even wanted him breathing near you in the first place.
───
It had only been three, going to four hours, ever since Daniel got his heart crashed, made a fool of himself not only in the courtroom, but also in front of you. For him, it felt like days, even a full week. His only company was a bottle of Jack Daniel’s that he’d almost finished, stuffing it in his coat’s large pockets as he walked back home.
This was how you felt about him. You hated him.
And he’d have to make amends with that, but not without the encouragement of cheap alcohol pouring into his system. Thank god for Ross, who always bought him all the booze he needed.
You, on the other hand, had wasted all of your breath trying to look for Daniel everywhere. It’d almost been an hour and you were at the hands of Sam, trying to think about all the possible locations that his friend could be at. You searched for him at the O Club, down at the basketball court, even his own apartment, but he was nowhere to be found. Your heart was beating rapidly against your chest, caught in your throat as you walked back to his neighborhood, opting to give his apartment another try. It’d been more than thirty minutes ever since you first went, maybe he’d returned by now. Your hands were shaking as you brought a loosely balled up fist to the surface of the door, hesitantly knocking on it once, twice — then heard steps from inside.
“Go away.”
Your entire body eased momentarily at the sound of his voice. Good, he wasn’t dead. His tone was cold and distant, nevertheless, and you knew that he was in no mood for seeing or even speaking to you after how you’d behaved during his speech, or even earlier, during the trial. Your mouth went dry at the first attempt of speaking back to him.
“Danny—”
“You’ve got no place to call me that.”
Oh. So, you’d really broken him.
“Daniel,” you corrected yourself halfheartedly, your hands rubbing up and down against the sides of your outer thighs, “can you let me in?”
“No.”
Your face dropped. You weren’t used to Daniel being so… you didn’t even know how exactly to describe it. The relationship between the two of you hadn’t started on a brilliant basis, neither did it get any better throughout all the time, but even though he didn’t seem to like you very much, he’d always been open for you, in some sort of way that your mind still struggled to comprehend.
“Daniel, please,” you begged, stepping back, surprised when his door creaked open just an inch to reveal his heavy lidded, blurry eyes.
“Do you have anything to say to me about the case? Otherwise, get moving, Commander.”
“Did you… Are you drunk?” you found yourself asking worriedly, ignoring his previous question.
“Why do you care, huh? Last time I checked, you didn’t give two shits about me!” he yelled, slamming the door back shut into your face, causing you to flinch. “Get the fuck out of here.”
“So this is it?”
Daniel swore he was only a second away from exploding, your question sending him over the edge as he chuckled in frustration, not knowing whether you asked what you asked simply to piss him off, or if you were genuinely placing an inquiry that you had been unclear about.
“This is what? Are you fucking with me?”
“You’ve hated me ever since you stepped into my office. You always did, say it. Just say that you hate me, you can’t stand me anymore, come on. Or is this just for Sam’s ears? That you wished I’d taken you out of the case just so you wouldn’t have to listen to my voice any longer. Come on, Kaffee, that’s all you’ve got to say.”
Daniel backed away in disbelief, then made you silently wince as he punched hard against the door, the sound of his skin hitting the processes wood ringing in faint echoes inside your eardrums. You’d driven him out of control.
“Me? Hate you? How could you possibly say such a thing — I — I…” Daniel wasn’t sure how to continue the sentence. There were too options and both of them would have a negative impact upon your relationship with each other and case.
One; he could let his tipsy mind ramble on and on about how you hadn’t once left his mind ever since he saw you for the first time, that he’d never felt so intimidated by anyone, never had fallen into such a deep awe of someone’s passion and ability to pursue their goals in life. That he wished he could possess the one thirds of your courage and determination, because you were honestly scared of nothing, got all the questions you wanted answered within a heartbeat. You didn’t back down in any occasion, you were your own person and Daniel had fallen so deeply in love with everything that you so proudly owned in your character that he thought he was a lost card.
Two; he could never continue the sentence, trail off and stay completely silent, see if you had anything to reply to him — and of course, he opted for the safest option, which was the second one. He was too scared of wearing his heart on his sleeve, knowing that you’d break it anyway.
“The fact that you’re so fucking scared of being a lawyer is beyond me. You’re in the Navy for crying out loud, get a hold of yourself,” was all you muttered in response, leaning against his door, completely unaware of the fact that he was also in the same position, that if the door disappeared in thin air that very moment, you’d fall on top of him with your mouth so dangerously close to his own that he’d pass out (and so would you, in some extent.)
Daniel’s every muscle was so tightly contracted, that he believed they’d crash altogether without any warning if he spent one more minute, forehead pressed against the door, knowing damn well that you were still outside, that you breathed just as heavily as he did, that he’d tied himself to the tracks, ready to be run over.
He knew that whatever was happening in that moment would reek of runny makeup and salty tears, sweat of agony running down the faces of two attorneys, bewildered and scorned as they fell into silence in preference of doing what they’d studied in law school for four years; defend their own selves, master the words. The ability of speaking had died down your throats near the day you chose bitterness over respect for each other.
Daniel averted his eyes to the ground, mustered all the courage he could possibly get and loosened his fingers in his fist. He called your name once, twice, but no reply ever came back. He knew you’d left, could understand it by the way he peaked through the glass hole in his door and saw that no one was there. His logic screamed at him to stay where he was, crash in the couch, close his eyes and sleep, forget about the case, forget about you, the conversations, the feelings, the tension, everything. Take down the entire Jack Daniel’s bottle and lean into the cushions without any further thinking.
Thank God that Daniel hated logical reasoning.
His door flew open as he hurried outside, not caring about his half unbuttoned dress shirt and blowsy uniform. It had been raining for hours now, the steady patter of water hitting against the windows of his small apartment long since faded to a dull rush in the back of his mind. He stepped out of the building, the thick material of his coat almost getting soaked through instantly. He squinted his eyes, trying to make out how far ahead you’d gotten, the pouring rain blurring his vision as he eventually spotted you on the road.
“Commander!” he shouted, but you didn’t turn, so he called for your name instead, numerous times until your feet gave up. A piercing gust of wind shook the trees above your head, showering your already miserable frame with a fresh deluge. You wiped the water from your eyes with a wet sleeve and tucked a lock of long brunette hair that fell into your eyes behind your dampened ear.
“I don’t want to talk to you anymore,” you said with a steady voice, barely audible in the downpour. Daniel tried to catch his breath as he finally reached you, looking like he was about to either melt along with the rain, or simply vanish.
“No, I can’t accept that. We — We braved extraordinary circumstances to get over here. You need to give me one chance,” he begged, but you kept walking, tired of his mediocre speeches and dramatic overreactions everywhere possibly imaginable. You wanted facts, wanted to listen to him fully, crystal clearly admit what he had to say. Not dance around it like he’d catch on fire. “Hey, I’m talking to you! Fucking listen to me!”
“Fuck off, Lieutenant Kaffee!” you screamed back, not caring about the fact that the rain would probably give you a deadly cold the following day, if not kill you by throwing you off at a very abrupt road pit. Daniel was soaked, hair sticking to his forehead and still very drunk. He felt embarrassed of how high pitched his voice got whenever he yelled from the top of his lungs, almost sounding like a complaining kid at the supermarket, who wouldn’t get the sweets he wanted from the counter while waiting to pay.
He needed answers. Did you even like him?
“You’re saying I’m scared and you can’t even face how you feel!” he shouted catching you off guard. “You can’t even look at me without lying.” Your blood was boiling into your veins as you gave him that chance, which he so desperately wanted, to explain himself to you, to see what he had to say.
“What did you just say?”
Daniel came closer, hands shaking from the temper building within him, looking pathetic as his hair dripped along with the rain down his face.
“You say I’m scared, but you’re terrified. At least I’ve shown you how I feel about you. I give myself away, because I can’t hold back everything that goes into my head the second you walk in it. I’m too weak to defend myself when it comes to you — look at me, you make me forget how to do my job — and I’m one of the most qualified lawyers out there, according to the Navy.”
“What are you talking about? You haven’t even once told me anything about how you feel about me. I’ve overheard you say to Sam that you hate me, that you wish you couldn’t hear my voice. What the fuck were you on about, huh, Kaffee?”
Daniel threw his hands and looked up, gulping down his worn out feelings as he tried to collect himself from breaking down in front of you, yet once again. “You know what Sam said to me when I kept telling him all that stuff about you?”
“I don’t care about what he said to you,” you scoffed in annoyance, ready to leave again, when you heard the words fly out of his mouth.
“That I’m in love with you!”
Daniel ached to prove that you were the scared one in this, breath wasted as he summoned every single ounce of remaining strength he had to grab you by the arm and yank you close to him, crashing his lips into yours forcefully. He never imagined the first time he’d get to kiss you to be that way. His body was trembling in fear (and because of the weather), heart hammering in the most literal way possible. The kiss barely lasted, seeing as you pushed him away almost instantly.
He felt crashed into millions of pieces, exploding like they did in the cartoons. He’d gathered so much courage to finally kiss you, and there you were, looking at him like he’d committed some sort of unbelievable crime, like he’d offended your honour. Daniel felt like an idiot; he’d ruined everything even worse. Had he really misinterpreted every look, every conversation, every fight? He wanted to cry, so he did. His tears ran down his salty cheeks, mixing with the rain, which allowed him to sob as hard as he needed to, not caring whether it made him look more pathetic and weak than he already was.
Who was going to see anyway?
You weren’t saying a word and Daniel was sure that another heartbeat was all it would take for the organ to crawl up inside his throat and hurl out, break; rip in two. He’d said his biggest fear, had actually put the exact words in it, then proceeded to throw an action. And he was destroyed, not because you didn’t kiss him back or because you pushed him away, but because you had chosen the mute torture of silence.
“…What else do I have to do to prove to you that I’m so fucking head over heels for you that I can’t possibly concentrate on anything else? I might lose the case and make a fool of myself, because you make me not think,” he tried again, this time with a fragile and weak voice. He honestly had no idea what more he could do to convince you about his feelings, about how nuts you drove him with your attitude and insane personality.
But again, you opted not to say anything. Instead, you quickly took a few steps forward, grabbed him by the ends of the collar of his long, black coat and pulled him into you, mouth capturing his own swiftly as you tilted your head to the side, deepening the kiss. Daniel was paralyzed for a short second, not knowing if he’d been struck by some sort of lightning that had killed him and brought him to a different reality, or whether you kissing him was an actual, real, skin to skin thing.
Stupidly enough, he allowed his lips to turn upwards into a broadening smile, responding with such enthusiasm, even though he was ridiculously taken aback by your choice of action. It took him a minute to regain his composure, the storm — hell, the entire world — around you feeling meaningless as his hands laced with yours, causing your grip on him to relax a little.
Daniel was falling fast, faster than ever, craving more of your scent and the feel of you pressed closer and tighter to him, the taste of alcohol mixing along with the buds of your mouth, unsure how this whole story had even began for him.
But his stupid, stupid lungs had to find air, and he was forced to separate from you with the feeling of gravity being torn out of his core. You’d disconnected your hands from his (with another pitiful drop in his stomach) so you could run them through his disheveled, wet hair, and his eyes fluttered close at the touch. You looked up at him with an emotion that neither of you could really find the words to explain, and Daniel wanted to kiss you again, heat rising to his face, forming a what he thought could be a permanent blush as his heart nearly leapt out of his chest.
“I’m so wet,” you realised out loud with a dumb smile, trying to hold back a giggle as you watched him bemusedly, eyes glowing brightly at the way he looked at you with such confusion, a bulge straining into his damp uniform pants.
“What — wha… what?” his voice was high pitched and shaky as he cleared his throat. “Oh! Shit — the rain, let’s — let’s get you inside!” He was so flustered and hard, just from one kiss, and he stuttered in every word he spoke. He took his coat off and covered your head with it as he grabbed you by the hand, hurrying back to his apartment.
When you went inside, you acted all unbothered, like nothing had even happened just a moment ago, and it was killing Daniel, because he was terrified of you throwing him away once again. He helped you to the couch, then rushed into his bedroom, pulling out every piece of clothing that he had in the wardrobe with such anticipation as he anxiously roamed through the selves to find blankets to offer you, get you dry from the rain.
“Okay, this is all I have. Do you prefer the pink or the... what color is this — orange? Coral? Erm, which one—” he was getting tongue tied and you found it adorable, taking both blankets off his hands as he stared at us, mesmerised. You looked over your shoulder, as if he was looking through you, then returned your gaze at him, getting nervous. “I’ll — I’m going to make coffee!”
You heard him smack his forehead as he went in the kitchen and grinned like a child. “Daniel?” you called from the living room with a slight chuckle.
“Yeah?”
“It was coral, by the way.”
“Huh?”
“The blanket. It was coral. Can I change my clothes? I’m getting your couch wet,” you asked.
“Sure! Closet’s in the left.”
You got up, wrapped in the blankets as you walked into his closet, shamelessly going through all of his ridiculous, childish, cheap shirts that you so deeply hated (loved). You found a black shirt, which you threw over your body as you picked a checkered shirt to put on as well, feeling a little lump from the chest pocket. You went through it and pulled out an unused condom, cheeks turning pink as you held out the object and went to the kitchen, proudly exposing it in your hand.
“Is this a gift?” you questioned, laughing wholeheartedly when you noticed Daniel’s cheeks burn red in earth swallowing embarrassment.
“Oh… uhm,” he snatched the condom off you, “you’re wearing my special shirt.”
“Your what?”
“My special shirt. It’s for… good luck… for when I go to baseball games and everything. Or — Or dates. Nothing important, no need to make a great deal out of it.” He felt dead inside, still very confused by the fact that you still hadn’t made the smallest reference to the kiss you’d shared. Was it just a thing that occurred due to the heat of the moment? It broke him just to think so, because for a split minute, he gave himself the permission to picture the two of you together, as an actual couple in love. Was he supposed to bring it up first? Were you waiting for him?
Daniel felt like a jerk, unintentionally pouting.
“Please,” you mumbled. Please stop being pathetic, I really like you too. “Danny?”
“It’s still raining. You can stay… I mean, if you want to, of course.” And gosh, both of you were about to melt, saying nothing, just staring at each other with millions of words being exchanged just through the different kinds of gleams in your eyes. You fucking hated Daniel Kaffee so much.
“Danny?” you repeated and he urgently shook his head, letting you know that you could keep going with the question. You smiled warmly, wrapping your arms gently around his neck, then, “I’d love to stay overnight. Oh, and you’re like seven of the strangest men I’ve ever met.”
FIN.
for your information, me and @honeymvnt wrote this together. might be one of the best things i’ve ever had the chance to write, ilysfm lia 🫵🏼🎀
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ros3ybabe · 5 months
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Daily Check-in: April 28, 2024 🎀
No updates for Friday and Saturday, both were just so busy with class, work, and I pulled a double shift on Saturday last minute. But Sunday was super productive, and I'm so happy with that! Woke up at 5am, did some of my morning routine, and just seriously got so much done! Feeling so good about how Sunday went <3
🩷 What I Accomplished:
woke up early
read a chapter of "Good Vibes, Good Life" (I really like this book right now)
washed, folded and put away clothes
washed and put away towels
washed sheets, pillowcases, comforter, and blankets
washed dishes
cleaned the bathroom
dusted the bedroom furniture + window blinds + my table fan
clorox wiped all my electronic devices to disinfect them from the week
swept bedroom
threw out all empties in the bathroom
cleaned out my instagram following and some of my tiktok following (digital detox is in progress)
deleted uber/uber eats off my phone (I have a bad habit of ordering food when I really shouldn't be)
cooked turkey chili from scratch (and it came out so yummy and filling)
morning journaled
night skincare
ordered groceries for the next two weeks
made a brain dump list for the week
planned out morning workouts for the week and updated them on my notion
had a zoom Netflix date with my boyfriend (we talked about our upcoming 2 year anniversary, too. i don't think I'll get to see him in person but we're still gonna make it a good day!)
💞 Good Things That Happened:
honestly, all of it. Sunday was a really good day for me, besides some stuff I had to work through mentally.
💗 Stuff For Monday
complete psyc extra credit research surveys
work on reopened chemistry homework
study Spanish for a while (I have an italki meeting/lesson early Tuesday morning for the first time ever)
read some more of Good Vibes, Good Life
go to class
go to work!
night time skincare and shower after work
💕 Song of The Day: Espresso by Sabrina Carpenter
this song. I love this song. such a girly energy. we love the girly, feminine vibes, 100% 🩷🩷🩷
til next time lovelies 🩷
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thestalwartheart · 2 months
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007 Fest 2024 Masterpost
It's 11:59pm here on the 31st of July, and I'm signing off from Fest 2024 feeling like this:
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Fics
toothpaste a cup runneth over the wait the quiet whisper i can't get no the hour before tea he's a little bit
Misc
Moodboard: TEXAS HOLD 'EM (00Leiter) Moodboard and ficlet: A little bit Alexis Bond Poem: first impressions
RADI00Q: 31 Songs for Bond and Q
A full playlist of every song featured this month is available on Spotify (thanks @eleanor-is-fine!) and YouTube.
Want to relive the moodboards? Here they are:
Song 1: Good Luck, Babe - Chappell Roan Song 2: Will We Talk? - Sam Fender Song 3: I Saw - Young Fathers Song 4: This Is The Last Time - The National Song 5: Everything - MUNA Song 6: Little Red Corvette - Prince Song 7: I Hope That I Don't Fall In Love With You - Tom Waits Song 8: Blue Monday - New Order Song 9: Love Calls You By Your Name - Leonard Cohen Song 10: Catherine Wheel - The Whitlams (covered by Megan Washington and the SSO) Song 11: Pale Blue Eyes - The Velvet Underground Song 12: England - The National Song 13: Phobia - Nothing But Thieves Song 14: Sunday Best - Megan Washington Song 15: You Are In Love - Taylor Swift Song 16: I Touch Myself - The Divinyls Song 17: The Heart Is A Muscle - Gang of Youths Song 18: Want Me - Baby Queen Song 19: Mystery of Love - Sufjan Stevens Song 20: Do I Wanna Know - Arctic Monkeys Song 21: Call Your Girlfriend - Robyn Song 22: I Wish I Was Sober - Frightened Rabbit Song 23: The Walls Are Way Too Thin - Holly Humberstone Song 24: How Soon Is Now? - The Smiths Song 25: Ocean Blue - Kita Alexander Song 26: Maybe You Know - Holy Holy Song 27: Writer - Paolo Nutini Song 28: A Sunday Kind of Love - Etta James Song 29: Linger - The Cranberries Song 30: Overcome - Nothing But Thieves Bonus song: Tears For Fun - Griff Song 31: 'Til Forever Falls Apart - Ashe & FINNEAS
--- GUEST SPOTS ---
Voice In My Throat - Pearl and the Beard Nothing's Gonna Hurt You Baby - Cigarettes After Sex It Had To Be You - Frank Sinatra Wildest Dreams - Taylor Swift Shameful Company - Rainbow Kitten Surprise Splinter - MYRNE & salem ilese Please Please Please - Sabrina Carpenter Drive You Home - Garbage Hold Me Closer - Cornelia Jakobs The Ocean - Dar Williams Starlings - Elbow Talk - Hozier
I am genuinely so thankful to everyone who hyped up and supported me this month. You’re all angels.
And if your song didn’t make it to RADI00Q this month: I’m so so sorry! There were a few I didn’t have the spoons to get around to. But stay tuned - August and September might bring a few surprises 😘
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sloppysequinz · 2 months
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Mona and Lacy’s Sunday Morning
Sequel to this story. Return of the girlfriends!
Mona blinked blearily as the sunlight hit her eyes. Was it morning? Her head spun. She was definitely still drunk, at least. The last thing she remembered was….flashing the bartender for shots? Was that before or after the bouncer had offered her pills for head?
She heard a groan next to her. Looking over, she saw her girlfriend Lacy, pretty blonde hair a rats nest, raccoon eyed from last nights makeup. Mona smiled. At least they had ended up together. She hated when men thought they could bring Lacy home without her.
But, glancing around, she saw they were in their own bedroom. They were both naked, sprawled on their king-sized bed. They hadn’t bothered to get under the covers—probably too drunk or too busy fucking each other to sleep. Mona could feel last nights mascara caking up her eyelashes. Their dresses and heels were piled by the door. There was a half-empty handle of vodka on the dresser. All things considered, a pretty tame Sunday for the two of them.
Lacy moaned again, nuzzling into Mona’s tits. Mona rolled over to let her girlfriend snuggle into her, petting her pretty blonde hair and trying to gently work out some of the mess.
“How are you, baby?” Mona asked gently.
“Uhmmm…fugged up, mommy.” Lacy responded weakly. “I sink I’m drunk.”
“I think you’re more than drunk.” Mona chuckled, pinching Lacy’s cheek. “The boys were generous with you last night.”
“Yeahhhhh….” Lacy grinned up at her proudly. Mona sat up and manhandled Lacy on to her stomach. Lacy giggled and flipped bonelessly around. Mona eventually gained her prize, her pretty girlfriend’s ass, presented for inspection. She slid her fingers between the artificially rounded cheeks, exposing Lacy’s hole. It was red and inflamed and dried cum was splashed onto the cheeks on either side. Lacy moaned as Mona slid a finger inside. Cum dripped out as she fingered it, an enormous volume of cum—more than even Mona would have expected. She stopped her inspection, ignoring Lacy’s protesting whine.
“Very generous indeed~” she teased. She let Lacy clean the cum off her fingers, eager and greedy tongue lapping it up. Lacy looked at her adoringly as she swallowed the mix of strangers cum, drugged and drunk pupils blown wide even under the morning sun. Mona resumed stroking her hair and Lacy snuggled into her lap.
“It’s a shame you can’t get pregnant, puppy.” Mona mused. “You’d be such a pretty whore mother to some stranger’s baby.”
Lacy giggled. “Would be a puppy’s puppy.” She slurred. Mona giggled back.
“You’re right, puppy. So smart.” Mona praised her. Lacy wiggled her butt as though wagging her tail. Mona leaned down to give her a kiss. “Do you wanna sober up, baby?” She asked gently.
“Noooooo” Lacy replied. “I feel good, mommy.”
“Ok, honey.” Mona replied. She wiggled across the comforter to rummage through the bedside table drawer, pausing only to take a pull from the vodka bottle. She pulled out a bag of edible gummies and returned to her beloved dog. “Here,” she said to Lacy. “Puppy treats.”
“For bein’ good?” Lacy asked sweetly.
“For being good.” Mona affirmed. Lacy obediently opened her mouth and Mona began feeding her gummies, following each one with a kiss. Lacy chewed and swallowed, trusting Mona to take her where she wanted to be. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5….that should be enough for now.
Mona ruffled Lacy’s hair as she swallowed the last one. “Get some more sleep.” She ordered. “You’ll feel even better when you wake up.” Lacy obediently snuggled into the soft bed. Mona ate a couple of the gummies herself, then grabbed the vodka and staggered into the bathroom.
First, a shower for her. Then, a big breakfast—the edibles were gonna hit both their stomachs hard after yesterday’s liquor dinner. Then, drawing a bath to wash her dumb slut inebriated puppy girlfriend in.
Mona took another pull of vodka and stretched languidly, foreseeing a lazy day ahead of her. The world started to tilt and she smiled.
Sobriety could wait until tomorrow.
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